#i know they apologized but i haven't fully recovered yet

[seospicybin]

VIEWFINDER.

PART II

Seungmin x reader x Lee Know. (s,a)

Chapters: Part I

Synopsis: An accidental reunion sets the sparks fly between you and Seungmin, but the relationship takes a turn at the end of the summer and you seek help from your frenemy, Minho. (20,2k words)

Author's note: Contains angst and 2min fighting for you. Enjoy!

📼 Viewfinder playlist.

Summer break has ended and the first time you're dreading it. You are usually excited to go back. You always come with new goals and study plans, starting all over with a refreshed spirit after the long break.

Rina is strangely quiet about you not coming home for days until one day before the summer break ends. When you came home yesterday, she only looked at you for a moment then eyeing the food you brought.

Food is the best option to solve problems and cure heartbreak. She seems to have moved on though or she's covering it well with her usual bright smile and glossy lips.

"Can't wait to go back to university life," she says with sheer sarcasm, throwing her bag onto the sofa.

"Yeah," you half-heartedly respond while pouring coffee into her favorite mug.

"That's weird," she says, folding her legs on the sofa and taking her mug of coffee from you, "You usually would give a speech about how excited I should be."

You dryly laugh and sit on the armrest of the sofa. It feels awkward being with her after living with Seungmin for weeks, you have to keep reminding yourself to be careful around her.

"So... how are you?" You ask, followed by a sip of coffee.

"Feeling like shit actually," she bluntly answers.

So she hasn't fully recovered yet from the break-up, and you feel bad for your absence at such dire times.

"I'm sorry for not being here," you sincerely apologize.

She waves you off and swallows her coffee, "You're spending time with someone and you seem happy so who am I to stop you?"

That puts some weight off your chest and you feel at ease after hearing that.

"Although, I'm disappointed that you haven't introduced him to me yet," she says, narrowing her eyes at you.

You close your eyes as guilt paints over your face, "Promise, I'll make time and introduce him to you."

"Okay, good!" Rina simply responds and starts checking her phone as it rapidly dings with new notifications.

You check the time and it's time to go, you have to ride a bicycle to campus so time management is crucial for you.

"I have class at 8," you announce as you put your coffee mug into the sink and quickly grab your bag from your bedroom, "Bye, Rina!"

You're riding your bicycle while enjoying the warm sunlight when another bicycle almost crashes at you, forcing you to brake and almost sending you to crash.

"It's too early for this, Minho!" You groan in complaint.

"I'm surprised you didn't dress like a biker chick with a leather jacket and spiked boots," he jokingly says, taking a jab at you.

"I'm surprised that you didn't ride a motorcycle yourself."

Minho likes to think that he's that intimidating, well, he could be at times but you're never scared of him. You give him the side eyes and notice that he changes his hair color into soft brown which softens his sharp facial features.

You laugh and click your tongue at him, "I'm not aware that robot gets jealous. They must have updated your software while I was away."

"Me? Jealous?" He innocently asks.

"Buy a motorcycle and grow up, Minho!" You say while paddling towards the gate of the campus, leaving him behind you to not let him drag your spirit down when you need it the most.

Summer hasn't completely left yet and you want to soak as much sun as you can before the weather turns colder but you hope you stay warm inside no matter the season.

-

The time isn't right.

When you have time, Seungmin is busy working and when he has time, you're busy studying. This is why you hate being away from him, your heart aches and is heavy with longing for him. The only way to solve it is by making time. You dash out of the room the second the last class ends and bicycle your way back to the apartment to the point that your legs burning.

Thank God, Rina isn't home yet or she'll ask you a ton of questions before letting you walk out of the door. Remembering how much Seungmin likes seeing you in a dress, you borrow one from Rina's closet and call a taxi to get you to his apartment.

Since Seungmin sometimes uses his apartment as a workplace, he keeps the door unlocked at all times and you push the door with your shoulder while carrying the food you bought on the way with the plan of having dinner with him.

There is no one inside and it's not like you have any other options, you put the bags of food on the kitchen island and grab yourself a glass of water. As you're about to pour yourself another glass of water, the door swings open and Seungmin comes through the door, his hair is disheveled and you guess it's from wearing a helmet.

"Hi," you quickly greet him but keep a space to not creep him out.

"Hey," he says, looking slightly taken aback and you're sure it's because you came without telling him.

"I'm sorry I came without telling you," you say because it's always safe to apologize first.

"I just—"

Now that he has acknowledged your presence and you're not creeping him up for coming unannounced, you walk up to him and kiss him. A kiss that slowly revives you and brings you back to life, God knows you needed it so badly. You gasp when you let go of the kiss, "I just miss you so much."

Seeing his face and not kissing him is impossible, you allow yourself to kiss him again, a little longer than the first one.

"Okay, I'm— I brought us food and we can have dinner together. It's you..." your word trails off as someone appears behind him, a girl with a model body and beautiful long, blonde hair.

"Oh, you have a guest!" You wildly assume, trying to fill in the awkward silence that passes between the three of you.

Seungmin turns to look at her and says, "Can you wait in the studio?"

"Sure," she answers, carrying her purse with her in the direction of the studio with a big sliding door that separates it from his private space.

He then looks at you and says, "Come with me!"

Science says that whenever you get a bad feeling, it's actually anxiety, and as much as you hate to admit it, it could be both.

You and Seungmin sit on the end of the bed, he's softly smiling at you as he fixes your hair. That usually works to soothe you but not now. Your hands are balled into fists on your lap and you just want to vomit all of your thoughts out.

"You're working tonight?"

"She's working with you?"

"It's okay if you are, I'll just go and—"

Oh God! It's happening, you're rambling. It's the anxiety-talking, not you. The only thing that stops you is your body turns against you and makes you choke on air midsentence.

"That is Yoora," he answers, "We worked together a few times and we've been hanging all afternoon."

It's the way he casually shares all that information with such ease that gets your nails digging into the inside of your hands.

"Hanging out, huh?" You almost lose your breath at the end of the sentence.

Seungmin places his hand on yours and calmly speaks, "Before I speak further, can you please keep your mind open? Can you do that for me?"

You nod as you feel your windpipe is closing in and making it harder for you to breathe.

"I like you very, very much," he begins.

"But I'm not used to conventional things. Social obligations and forced conversations. Saying no to all the things I want to say yes to," he shakes his head in despise of those things.

Your mind is scrambled to even try to stick with one thought or any thought for that matter.

"And that includes dating."

No matter what he's trying to say, it seems like the only conclusion you make in your head is that he wants to stop dating you.

"Do you want to break up with me?" You croak.

"No, no," he quickly denies.

Seungmin quietly inhales air and licks his lips before speaking, "I want to keep dating you but I want our relationship to be an open one."

You can't force your brain to work with the lack of oxygen and anxiety taking over, "What do you mean?"

"We're dating each other but at the same time, we're free to see someone else," he explains.

Yes, you do know what an open relationship is but what you're questioning is how calm he is about this. This is how far you let your mind open yet you still have a hard time processing it.

"Look, I'll understand if you don't want to do this but I want to give this a shot. We have the—"

You hold your hand up to stop him talking and take your hands from under him, "Give me a minute!"

Turning your head the other way and look out the window to see your reflection against the dark of the night sky yet you still can't make sense of everything. You look at him and force yourself to smile, "I need time to think."

"Okay," he says with a nod.

You get up from the bed and wipe your clammy hands on the hem of your dress which reminds you of how you made the time to come here only to receive a shocking revelation. Seungmin is trailing behind you as you take your jacket and purse from the sofa. You walk in the direction of the door and see that the blonde girl is unpacking the food you brought.

"Can I eat this?" She asks, not sure if she's asking you or Seungmin.

You glance at Seungmin and then at her, "Yes, you can have it. Please, don't let it go to waste," you say with an edge to your voice.

After what he asked of you, you can't bring yourself to look at him and not feel bitter about it. Maybe it's your fault for thinking you're that special to him.

Seungmin blocks you from getting to the door, "Hey, I hope you know that I meant it when I said I like you," he says.

Well, that only makes you guess how many times he has said that or more importantly, how many girls. He puts his hand under your chin and forces you to look at him.

"You're not like the other girls I know. We were married once," Seungmin tries to be playful but it falls short on your end.

You put on a weak smile for him as you stare into his eyes, hoping he can see how devastated he makes you feel right now.

"Can I kiss you?"

You wonder if his kisses would either heal or break you apart so you nod.

Seungmin caresses your cheek and tells you the answer with a soft kiss on your lips. You look down the second your lips parted and tell yourself that maybe you shouldn't have been curious. That's just you, blessed with inquisitiveness. You read books because you want to know and the more you know the less afraid you would be when faced with a strange situation like this.

However, for the first time in your life, you don't want to know the answer to this.

-

The plan is to stop thinking about Seungmin.

However, the more you try to distract yourself from it, the more you think of him. He's not only invading your head, he's overriding your life altogether. You're hardly studying, you can't sleep, you lost your appetite, you come home only to wallow more in your room. It's been like that for a week.

Also a week without Seungmin calling or texting you, it's like the whole summer has gone away with the season.

When the professor announces that there'll be a quiz today, you're not confident you'll get a good score. Somehow, you let your discouraging thoughts manifest into reality. As you stare at the score written in red ink, you can't even be mad about it. It seems like you're going to keep spiraling down from here.

"Am I dreaming or I saw you got a C minus?" Minho says, peeking at your graded paper from behind you.

You crumple it in your hand and angrily shove it into your bag, not answering him. You're stomping your way out of the class to get away from everyone, and can't wait to go home to be by yourself again.

Your hand is rummaging inside your bag, looking for the key to the chain lock and almost having a breakdown for couldn't find it quick enough to avoid Minho.

"Congratulations Minho, you're smarter than me," you quickly say to him because that seems to be what he seeks from you, a validation that he finally gets ahead of you.

You put your bag into the basket with a loud thud and bend down to unlock the bike from the rack in silence.

"Drinks then? It's on me," Minho offers, standing with one hand on the handlebar of his bike.

"No, thanks," you answer without thinking then.

Minho shifts his weight to one side and slings his backpack on one shoulder, "Hey, are you okay?"

"How am I doing has nothing to do with the reason why I don't want to drink with you. I just don't have time for your self-centered, snobby remarks," you tell him, a little too harsh to be honest.

This is why you need to get away from people, you don't want to lash out at them. The words are out of your mouth, the damage has been done and all you need to do is leave.

You back your bicycle out of the rack but Minho quickly grabs you by the elbow, stopping you before another cycler crashes into you.

"HEY! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO WALK YOUR BIKE OUT BEFORE RIDING IT!" Minho scolds him even though he keeps riding away, unbothered.

He turns to look at you and asks again with his hand on your shoulder, "Are you really okay?"

You don't know why he chooses right now to be nice to you, you shrug his hand away from you and leave his question unanswered.

The heat that usually clung to the air has been replaced with a cool one, you're riding your bike with your eyes staying on the road and your mind wandering away from your body. It's muscle memory that helps you to keep paddling your way home without you having to order your brain to do it so and your reflex is still working when you make a quick turn to avoid two people carrying a big box across the street and in the process, you lost your balance and fall to the side, then onto the sidewalk.

You don't feel anything even after you arrive home and only notice a bruise on your ribcage when you change your clothes.

"Oh, God! That's a nasty bruise," Rina comments as she barges into the room without knocking like usual.

"I fell on my bike," you inform before she gets the wrong idea.

She takes a look at it and touches the skin, making you yelp in pain, "You should put ice on it," she says.

Rina wraps a few ice cubes in a thin towel, then sits next to you on the couch, slowly putting it on your bruised ribcage.

You hiss in pain while taking over the homemade ice pack from her, gently pressing on it, "Thank you!"

"Do not ride your bike for a while," she suggests, looking at you with worry.

You nod because there's no use fighting a losing fight.

Rina picks up her book and instead of reading it, she puts it on her lap. It seems like she has something else to say to you.

"Just say it..." you meekly allow her despite how blunt she can be.

She takes a breath and lets it out until both of her shoulders slumped, "Are you okay?"

"Why does everyone keep asking me that?" You sigh and rest your head back.

Rina puts her book away and turns on the couch to face, "Because you've been acting not like yourself lately. You're always in your room, you're barely talking to me and you don't even care that there's an expired carton of milk in the fridge right now," she lists out all of the things that are way out of your pattern of behavior.

"You always care about everything and now... it's just like you've given up, completely," she sadly adds.

She inhales air and asks again with concerns filling her light brown eyes, "What happened?"

You're not ready to talk about Seungmin to Rina. Not only that you haven't introduced him yet to her but that also means, she will not get the whole picture of what truly happened between you and Seungmin.

"Is it because of the guy you're seeing?" She asks like she's seeing through your head.

Rina is quick-witted so it's no surprise that she knows right away that the source of this change of attitude is an external one. She scoots closer and puts her hand on your knee, "Did you guys break up?"

It's time for you to take a deep breath and carefully answer her, "No, it's... complicated."

"Oh, no," Rina reacts by closing her eyes and letting out a dramatic sigh, "Complicated means it's even worse than breaking up."

Hates it when she's always right but Rina has more experience in dating and romance which automatically makes her smarter than you.

"So what is it? Does he have a problem getting it up? Weird kinks? Oh!" She suddenly gasps in surprise with both hands covering her mouth. She suddenly lowers her voice to say, "Are you pregnant?"

You groan in disgust and quickly deny, "No, it's not that."

Rina takes another guess at it and wipes her hands down her thighs, “Well if it has nothing to do with the sexual stuff then… commitment issue?”

Can’t tell if Rina is good at guessing or if all men have the same basic problem? But it’s taking you aback how spots on her guess is that you don’t know how to respond to it.

She raises her eyebrows at you knowing that she guessed it correctly, “Oh, it’s so classic,” she says with a smirk.

“It’s not exactly that but it’s around the commitment area,” you correct her.

Rina’s forehead wrinkled into a question. As she opens her mouth to say something, the doorbell rings. You both look at each other, trying to guess who’s behind that door because none of you ordering food or expecting a guest.

“I’ll get it,” Rina volunteers and walks to the door to open it.

You wait on the couch in anticipation, you don’t want to get your hopes up, but at the same time, your hopes are already flying higher than your expectation. You hear Rina chatting by the door before walking back inside.

“An attractive young man is looking for you,” Rina announces with a sly smile.

There’s someone behind her and as she walks closer, she steps aside to reveal the person walking behind her.

It’s him, the bruise that reminds you of your heartache, Seungmin.

-

After introducing him to Rina like she wanted, you take Seungmin to your bedroom to avoid Rina eavesdropping on your conversation and close the door behind you. You pull the chair from your study desk to slowly sit on it while Seungmin sits on the edge of the bed facing you. It wasn’t what you expected him to see when he walked in on you sitting on the couch, wounded.

“What happened?” He asks.

It’s not good to second-guess his intention but ever since that night, you keep wondering about the way he treated you. Was he being genuine? Was he faking it just to keep you wrapped around his little finger?

“Fell off my bike. It’s not a big deal,” you keep your answer short.

Seungmin seems to have expected this attitude coming from you and you believe it’s because he knows he deserves it. He sheepishly smiles and nods.

“At least, let me treat it for you,” he says.

You hug yourself to not let him see it, it’s already enough for him to see you’re hurting, “No, I’m alright now.”

He reaches for your hand and turns it to show you the scrape you have on the heel of your palm, “Let me take care of it for you.”

His hand is warm like the last time you hold it but you remember you shouldn’t have let him in and try to retract your hand from his, but his grip is strong. He takes the first-aid kit Rina brought to your room earlier.

Seungmin carefully dabs ointment on the scrape and then blows on it to soothe the pain. You hate to admit it but you long to share a moment like this with him and he’s so tender, so caring, he makes you feel like you’re the only one in the world. He’s still like a dream to you.

Once he safely covers your wound with a bandage, he holds your hand in his with his thumb softly rubbing on the back of your hand. He leans forward and looks at you, his eyes reminding you of summer days, bright and warm.

“I miss you,” his voice is as soft as the breeze slipping through the window.

You’re close to breaking but you put on a strong face, staring him right in the eyes, and say, “It doesn’t seem like that to me.”

Seungmin holds your gaze like you’re holding the galaxy in your eyes and trying to find out what’s lurking beyond the vast darkness. He takes your other hand and holds it on your lap as if it would help him find what he’s looking for.

“You didn’t call, you didn’t text,” your voice breaks at the end of the sentence and you can’t hold yourself together again.

“I can’t help but think that you don’t want me anymore.”

And right now, as he stares into your eyes, he’s seeing you wounded from the inside too.

“I just thought you need the space and time to think,” he tells you.

You break into tears and fall apart in front of him, there’s no use in hiding your pain anymore. You melt the moment he holds his arms out for you and into his welcoming embrace where it’s safe and comfortable, a haven.

“I miss you so much,” you admit and your heart shrinks in your chest.

Seungmin pulls you by the hands to let you sit on his lap and not waste time wrapping his arms around you so tightly, forgetting about the bruise you have.

“Ouch,” you shriek in pain and hurriedly put his hand away from where your bruise is.

“How about we lay down, mmh?” he suggests.

Oh, how you miss his scent! He smells of sunshine, leather, and fabric softener, he’s of everything that makes you think of the summer when he took you on trips on his motorcycle. Your eyes are closed as you drink in his scent while he lightly runs his fingertips down your arm.

Seungmin gently kisses your arm and looks at you, “Are you still awake?”

“Mmh,” you answer with your eyes closed.

Endearingly, he puts the strands of hair covering your face and puts it to the side, “I don’t know if you believe this kind of thing but I think fate brought us back together again.”

You open your eyes and his eyes are the first thing you see, “You think so?”

“I waited years to meet you again and I feel there’s something here,” he speaks while brushing away the hair covering your face.

Hearing him being honest and open makes you realize that you owe him for not listening to what he had to say that night. This time, you want to give him the chance to explain himself.

“It’s the first time in my life that I feel this deeply for someone and it’s you,” he says as he puts your hair to the side and holds it there.

"I want to do it right with you and that's why I chose to be honest with you," he adds.

You hold his gaze as he speaks his heart out against the quiet of your room and your hand intertwined with his in the space between your bodies.

“But I understand if you don’t want to give this a shot. I just want to let you know that… I really like you, I do.”

Maybe it is possible to be in a relationship as long as you mainly focus on his true feelings for you and that's the only truth you need.

Who knows that with time Seungmin will realize that you're the only one he needs?

"I like you," you say back to him.

Seungmin brings your hand close to his mouth to kiss you and you use the chance to softly brush his lips with your knuckle.

It's not going to be easy but all you need to do is be more understanding and open-minded, you believe you can do those things for the sake of this relationship, for the sake of you and him.

"And I think we should give it a chance," you give your final answer to him.

A smile rises on his beautiful face and he leans in to kiss you, a soft kiss that pieces you back together and makes you whole. A kiss that once broke your heart but now revives it back to life. A kiss that has found its magic back.

"Thank you," he murmurs and he leans in again to place a long peck on your lips.

Seungmin lends his arm for you to use as a pillow and you're more than happy to comply, snuggling close into his body and leaving no gap between your bodies.

He repeatedly runs his hair through your hair and then softly asks, "Sleepy?"

You hum your answer while tightening your arm around him while he angles your head to place a soft, lingering kiss on your lips.

"Goodnight," he says right after he pulls away from the kiss.

How are you going to sleep with the butterflies fluttering in your stomach?

-

It's painful to put clothes on with the darkening bruise on your ribcage.

You're doing your usual morning routine, shower, breakfast, and skipping reading the news to focus on making your coffee. You're nervous about it since Seungmin takes his coffee seriously. It's not going to be as good as his but you try your best to at least make good coffee. You get startles startled when he appears with his eyes still sleepy and fluffy bedhead.

"You didn't wake me up," he says, trudging his way to you.

"You sleep so well. I feel bad if I have to wake you up," you answer.

He stops to stand next to you and sleepily smiles, "Morning!"

"Morning!" You say back with a smile, "Coffee?"

"Yes, please!" He sweetly answers.

You're reaching up for the cabinet to get mugs and yelp in pain, forgetting about the bruised ribcage.

"I'll get it for you," Seungmin offers, getting the mugs easily without having to stand on his tiptoes like you always do.

"Thank you," you carefully fill the two mugs with hot, steaming coffee.

You look at him as he takes a small sip, anticipating his reaction to your coffee, "Is it good?"

He takes another sip before answering, "It's fine."

You let out a quiet sigh of relief and can finally sip your coffee.

"Does it still hurt?" He asks, leaning the side of his body against the kitchen island.

"Only when I lift my arms," you reply.

Seungmin doesn't hesitate to lift your blouse to take a look at your bruise, observing it without touching it because he knows it'll be painful for you.

"Put ice on it regularly," he suggests, slowly letting go of your blouse.

"Okay," you reply.

"Don't ride your bike for now," he adds.

"Yes," you respond with a smile.

Seungmin takes another sip with his hand lingers on your hips, "I'll take you to campus today."

"No, it's okay, you don't have to," you kindly refuse, holding your coffee mug with both hands while looking up at him.

"I'm not asking," he says with his eyes staring at you.

You can't help seeing his hair tousled and not try to brush it for him, you put your coffee away so you can fix his hair.

"I'll finish the coffee and use your bathroom," he says, closing his eyes as you brush his hair to the back with your fingers.

"Clean towel on the top of the rack," you inform.

"Then I'll take you to campus," he continues.

"Okay," you put your hands away to let him go.

Seungmin opens his eyes and finds yours immediately, "Maybe after I give you kisses too," he says while putting down his coffee mug.

You are not prepared when he presses his lips on yours. The first kiss is a long peck on your lips and after that, he repeatedly pecks on your lips, making you giggle. In your peripheral vision, the door of Rina's bedroom is open and she's just standing there watching Seungmin kissing you in the kitchen. She eventually interrupts by clearing her throat.

"Good morning!" She cheerily says.

Seungmin reluctantly stops kissing you but keeps his hand on your waist, "Morning!"

"Coffee!" You quickly grab a new mug for him and Seungmin is kind enough to get it for you.

"Excuse me, I have to use the bathroom," Seungmin says, leaving you and Rina alone in the kitchen.

Rina is staring at you with a wicked grin on her face as you're pouring her a cup of coffee, making you feel uneasy. She waits until the sound of the shower is turned on to start drilling you with questions.

"So, that's the summer guy?"

"Yes."

"He's the one with the commitment issue?"

"Ah... yes," you awkwardly answer.

"I see that the issue has been solved," she says with her glossy lips curling into a sly smile.

You stall by sipping your coffee, "uhm... yes."

"I bet it was with one hot makeup sex," she wildly guesses.

You almost choked on your coffee hearing that because that isn't what happened. Last night, the two of you did solve the issue together then fell asleep right afterwards.

"No," you strongly deny.

Runa bursts into laughter, "Oh, my God! Chill! I'm just glad you stopped looking depressed and unmotivated," she says.

She lifts her coffee mug close to her mouth and adds, "Also glad that I don't have to hire a contract killer to hunt down the person who broke your heart."

You laugh at her words and refill her mug with more coffee to show your gratitude. Rina may seem bold and flippant, but you know that she actually cares deeply for you.

Seungmin holds out his hand to help you hop onto the back of the motorcycle. The campus is not that far so he rides slowly, holding your hand that is resting on his waist to shove it into the pocket of his leather jacket.

Suddenly, you don't want this ride to end, you want to ditch everything and just go wherever he takes you even if it's to the end of the world. You reluctantly get off the bike when he pulls up at the gate of the campus, slowly taking off your helmet to stall the time.

He also takes his helmet off, ignoring how disheveled his hair looks but that only makes him more attractive and you hate that everyone else can see him.

"Have a great day!" he wishes with a bright smile that softens his facial features, making him look like a puppy.

You hand him the helmet and wish the same for him, "You too. Have a great day!"

He reaches for your waist and pulls you close, smiling as he presses a soft kiss on your lips. At that moment, you don't care where you are or if anybody is watching. He holds the side of your face after letting go of the kiss, "I'll call you later, mmh?"

"Okay," you answer with a shy smile.

Taking you by surprise, he kisses you again and triumphantly smiles when he pulls away, "I'm going."

"Be careful!"

He puts his helmet on and you frown because that means there'll be no more surprise kisses. He turns the engine on and rides with the wind that brings him back to you.

-

The promise you made to yourself is that you'll keep your mind open and be more understanding.

There's not much changing except that he calls you once in a while or sends you a text when he's in the middle of work. You appreciate the effort and that he's keeping you in his thoughts. Seungmin has been keeping you on read for hours now and you try to distract yourself by watching a movie with Rina, you even made a bowl of popcorn for you to snack on together.

"It's Friday night," Rina blurts out of the blue with the bowl of popcorn resting close to her chest.

"And tomorrow is Saturday, yes, the point is...?" You half-heartedly ask her back.

"You have a boyfriend now. Aren't you supposed to be out and show the world how in love you are?" She says without looking at you.

"He's working tonight," you lie because it's easier than giving her the chance to analyze your relationship.

She turns her head to look at you and puts the bowl of popcorn on her lap, "Tell him you're alone at home, and trust me, he'll come running!"

You scoff because you know it'll hardly work on him and he probably gets that kind of text already, but they're most likely from the other girls, not you.

Now that she gets you thinking of the other girls Seungmin is seeing, you get up from the couch and go into your room. As you lay on your bed staring at the ceiling, you think of Rina's trick, it may be fallible, yes but it's worth trying. Instead of texting him, you call him and will keep on calling him until he picks up.

"Hey," you sweetly greet him as soon as he picks up the phone.

"Hey," he says back and it's nice that you can hear enthusiasm in his voice.

"What are you doing? Are you done with work?"

"Yes, I've just finished it," he answers along with rustles on his end of the line.

"Oh, that's great. How about we get dinner together?" You spontaneously ask him.

"Right now?"

"Yes, right now," you answer even though you have had your dinner already.

He sighs into the phone and then says, "I promised Lea that I'll treat her to dinner after work."

Your smile fades in a second and close your eyes, feeling defeated, "Okay, then."

There's a pause before Seungmin says something, "How about—"

"I'll see you," you abruptly end the call.

The other day it was Jane, yesterday it was Mila, and tonight, it's Lea. Another day, another girl to be worried about.

You fling your phone until it lands on the other side of the bed and sighs, "I'll see you never more like."

The next day, you have enough of giving other girls the chance to be with him. You wake up early, put on your nicest dress you just bought online, and spend an hour styling your hair, leaving the apartment even before Rina wakes up from her sleep.

You stop by the bakery on the way and buy a few baked goods, you don't bother buying the coffee because he'll only drink coffee he made himself. Except that day, Seungmin tolerated your coffee because it's you who made it. You push the door of his apartment and let yourself in, smiling because he's already awake. He's in the middle of grinding his coffee.

"How many of your muses come over in the morning bearing breakfast?" You say, showing him the bag of food you bring with you.

"Good thing I always brew a pot of coffee," he says in response.

He walks up to you, taking the bag from your hand to put it on the dining table so he can hug you and properly kiss you. One kiss is all it takes to remind you that a part of him is dearly yours and no one can take that away from you. You hold him back and hold on to him, returning his kiss with the same passion.

"Morning," he says with his lips glistening wet from the kiss.

You smile looking into his warm brown eyes, "Morning!"

Seungmin continues making his coffee and it's better to give him the space to do his morning ritual, you use the chance to take a look into his studio. You can see the trace of his works from last night from the lights and the props are still there, his computer is already on and you wonder if he's been up all night working. You return to the kitchen with a cup of coffee already waiting for you and you pull a chair to sit next to him.

"Did you stay up all night working?" You ask in curiosity.

"Kind of," he answers.

You frown and suddenly regret for coming when he needs the time to rest, "I'm sorry for coming without telling you."

He shakes his head and takes out a piece of pastry out of the bag, "I should be the one apologizing for not replying to your texts and the call."

You wave him off, "It’s okay. I was stupid for asking when I knew you were busy."

The morning sun hits him right on the eyes, making them shine as he softly gazes at you, "I want to show you something!"

He takes you back into his studio where he pushes the button to automatically close the windows, making it completely dark with the only source of light coming from the computer screen.

"Please, wait!" He tells you as he operates the computer, pulling a file from so many folders stored on his computer.

It gives you the itch at how unorganized his computer filing is but you hold the urge to say something. You look away and patiently wait like he asked you.

Then the projection turns on and shows moving images on the wall, you can't see it at first but after a moment, you recognize that it's you. These are all the pictures he took of you when you first came here, also the ones he took after he first kissed you that night.

"Is that me?" You ask in disbelief.

The girl in the pictures is beautiful, bright, and happy, it's nothing like you've seen countless times in the mirror. Seungmin hugs you from the back and watches it together with you with his hands wrapped around your waist, his chin resting on your shoulder.

"It's you," he assures you.

It's like seeing a side of you that you never knew you had but you believe it's because you were in love.

"What do you think?"

"It's beautiful," you delightfully sigh.

"You are beautiful," he says with a gentle kiss on your cheek.

You slightly turn your head to the side at him, "But it's also weird looking at myself, not that this is weird but seeing myself..." you look back at the projection and continue talking, "... like this."

He turns his head at you and says, "Well, you have to get used to this because you're my source of inspiration," he coyly says.

Seungmin must be oblivious to how much his words affect you. Your cheeks are heating and your heart is leaping, it means so much more that he said you're his source of inspiration. In that moment, you believe that it's possible to be his one and only, it takes time but you're willing to wait until he's ready.

You turn around to face him and look into his eyes, there are so many things you want to say to him but at the same time, you can't fathom them into words. You show it through a kiss instead, showing him how much he means to you by passionately kissing him and putting your hands around him to show that you don't want to let go.

Seungmin tightens his hold around you, one hand holding the nape of your neck so he can angle your head as he pleases so he can deepen the kiss and taste you more. He only lets go to let you catch a breath and capture your lips in a kiss again, harder and hungrier than before.

The sound of the door being slammed shut stops the kiss and you see through the doorway that someone is coming into the apartment.

"Am I early or...?" The girl asks.

Seungmin checks on his watch and says, "No. You're actually right on time."

He glances at you and introduces her to you, "This is Yoon. She models for me."

"Ah..." you lowly gasp and suddenly, you feel like you're getting in between them instead of the other way.

"I should go," you hurriedly walk out of the studio.

"No. Please, stay!" Seungmin says.

You grab your bag from the dining table and sling it on your shoulder, "I have something," you lie.

You're aware you have to sound believable when you lie, "I have to go shopping with Rina. She's waiting for me."

Seungmin is following you as you're walking to the door but you just want to get out of there quickly, "I'll call you later. Bye!"

You close the door behind you and never look back, but it seems like Seungmin doesn't bother to chase after you.

-

It's only ten in the morning, but you don't want to go home and risk being asked by Rina why you dressed so nicely on a Saturday morning. You stop by a grocery store and buy a loaf of bread, walking in the direction of the park to clear your head while feeding the ducks by the pond.

"Where are you going with a loaf of bread?" Someone asks.

You turn on your feet and see Minho, stopping on his bicycle to talk to you. You feel horrible for the way you treated him that day.

"To the park," you answer.

"And what are you going to do with the bread?" He asks, eyeing the bag of bread you're holding in one hand.

It's an embarrassing thing to admit but after what you did that day, you remind yourself to be better than shrugging him off.

"I'm going to feed the ducks by the pond," you admit.

Minho looks at you for a moment and nods, "I'll come with you."

He gets off his bicycle and decides to walk it as you both navigate your way through the park to the pond where a flock of ducks swimming by the pond.

"For you," Minho hands you a cup of coffee.

The coffee tastes bland compared to the coffee Seungmin made but you thank Minho nonetheless. You're ripping the bread into pieces before throwing it to the mother duck with her ducklings trailing behind her.

"So this is what you do on the weekend?" He asks.

Minho is wearing a knitted sweater that looks a size too big for him yet somehow it looks good on him. The royal blue color suits him well.

"Not really," you take another slice of bread to shred it into pieces, "I come here when I need to clear my head."

Minho cracks a laugh, "What could possibly piss you off this early in the morning?"

You shrug and toss a big chunk of bread to the other mother of duck.

"I assume it's a who, not a what," he says, then sips her coffee.

He then takes a slice of bread and helps you feed the duck as another flock gathers around you.

"That explains why you were upset that day," he says with a sly smile on his face.

Minho sees through you like you're a ply of tissue which instantly makes him more dangerous than Rina. Also, he is being polite when he says you're just 'upset' when he has the right to say you were such a bitch that day. You refrain from sharing more about how he can easily conclude with a few details and it reminds you to apologize.

"I want to say sorry for that day," you sincerely tell him.

One corner of his mouth curls into a lopsided smile, "It's alright."

It's the last slice of bread you're holding and before the ducks are asking for more, you walk away from the edge of the pond.

"Why are you walking so fast?" Minho asks while fumbling to collect the coffee cups to throw into the trash bin nearby.

"The ducks are going to chase us asking for more food," you turn from jogging to half-running.

The lunch is surprisingly delightful and you get to talk in a civil manner like normal people. Minho ends up paying for it since he pulls his credit card faster than you.

"Let's say we're even," he says.

He offers to give you a bike ride home again but with the previous experience and you've just had food in your stomach, you decide to switch the role this time.

"Only if I'm the one riding," you tell him, not wasting time to get on his bike.

He laughs at your idea, "Are you sure? I'm heavy."

The more he tries to underestimate you because you're a girl, the more challenged you are. You wave him off and tie your hair into a ponytail.

"Just hop on!"

Minho is right to underestimate you. You've been riding the same street for years and only realize now that a few of them are inclining.

"Are you sure you don't want to switch?" He asks from behind you.

You shake your head and pretend to be okay even though your legs are burning from paddling, "Nah. We're only a block away."

Minho silently laughs behind you, "Well, if you insist."

He is supposed to prevent himself from falling but it's the other way, he's holding you by the shoulders to keep you balanced.

"We're almost there!" He says, squeezing your shoulders with his hands.

You can see your apartment building and paddle the bike with the remaining strength you have, wanting to end this torture you put on yourself as fast as you can. It takes everything in you not to crash the bike and pass out on the pavement, you patiently wait for Minho to get off first, then park the bike next to the pole of a streetlight.

"Told you I'm heavy," Minho says.

You shake your head, still trying to play cool about it, "I haven't been cycling for a while so..." you can't even finish your sentence because your mouth is too busy catching your breath.

After a moment of Minho pretending to care for his bicycle when he's actually giving you time to compose yourself. When he deems that you're no longer panting, he turns around to look at you.

"I must say I'm impressed," he says.

Your hands are on your waist as you say, "Don't hold your breath, Minho."

He lowly chuckles and stops himself from continuing, "Now, we're even."

"That's fair," you nod in agreement.

You look at him and slyly smile, "I was lying when I said the ducks were going to chase us."

"I know," he casually says.

"Then why are you running with me?"

"Cause I wanted to," he simply answers.

It's hard to process that there's a part of him that is this easygoing and just so fun to be with. You can't stop laughing at how you only discovered this part of him at a random time and Minho can't help but laugh along with you.

As the hilarity subsidies with time, you take your bag and hold it in front of you, "Thank you for lunch!"

"You're welcome," he responds with a smile that you rarely see on him, warm and friendly.

He gets on his bike and looks at you, "I'll get going then."

"Be careful," you blurt and why would you say that when he always rides his bicycle everywhere, "I mean, yeah, be... careful!"

Minho only responds with a smile, then rides away.

When you come into the apartment, Rina is sitting on the window sill and you guess she saw everything. She looks at you after you lock the door behind you.

"And where have you been?" She asks with her sly smile on.

"Lunch with Minho," you simply answer, walking to the kitchen to get yourself a glass of water.

"Dressed like that?"

"I was..." You think of an alternative answer by taking a big gulp of water.

"Yeah," you decide to spare her the reason why you dressed so nicely.

"Now, that you have a boyfriend—"

You hold your hand up to stop her from talking, "Seungmin wouldn't be jealous, I can promise you that," you tell her because that's just the truth.

Seungmin is with a beautiful model named Yoon in his studio as you speak, he's not giving a damn about you going on lunch with a friend from campus.

"It's not that," Rina says.

You jerk your head away and take another gulp of water.

She walks up to you and stops behind the kitchen island, "You shouldn't lead him on."

"Can you not speak in riddles, Rina? Please?" You whine, still exhausted from giving a grown adult a ride on the bike.

"Minho likes you. You shouldn't lead him on," she makes it clear by emphasizing every word to you.

You snort and water almost comes out of your nose, "yeah, sure," you half-heartedly say, then laugh it off.

Rina follows you as you walk to your room then stops at the doorway, "Laugh and deny all you want but you know that it's true," she confidently says.

You smile at her because even if it's true, it wouldn't change a thing and Seungmin wouldn't mind with you seeing another man. But you're not going to do that, you're going to prove that you're the only one Seungmin needs.

-

Gone are the warm sunny days as autumn arrives with the change of the colors of the leaves. You put on your thin coat before going out of the class and on the way out of the building, Minho joins you while carrying his books in one arm.

"Have you read the email from Professor Lim?" He asks as he's descending the stairs next to you.

"What? Did I miss an assignment?" You ask back in panic and fumble to look for your phone from the pocket of your jeans.

"No, it's the invitation to his gathering," he answers.

You stop by the door and step aside, not wanting to block other people from passing by, "I don't think I'm invited," you hopelessly say.

Minho dramatically rolls his eyes at you, "You only failed one of his tests."

There it is! You open to check if it's really the invitation and indeed it is. Professor Lim only invited the brightest students in his class and knowing that your academic presence is a little declining due to personal issues, you can't lie but feel relieved that you're still considered as one.

"It's next Saturday," he says.

"Yes, I can see that," you tell him and continue walking down the stairs.

"So, who are you going to take?" He asks.

"Is it necessary to bring a plus one?" You ask with a raised eyebrow.

He shoves his hands into the pocket of his jeans, "You're not going to take your boyfriend?"

It's funny that when you hear the word boyfriend, you don't immediately think of Seungmin, he's your boyfriend but at the same time, he doesn't feel like one.

"I'll try to ask him but I'm not sure," you tell him.

You're heading to the gate since you haven't been able to ride your bike yet and Minho is following you instead of turning to the bike station.

"You didn’t ride your bike today?"

"Popped my tire yesterday and I haven't got time to take it to the shop," he replies.

Even with an extra layer of clothes you're wearing, the cold wind is slipping through you. You're rubbing your hands together to warm yourself.

"Want to get some coffee?" Minho asks.

Having a warm drink in a weather like this couldn't be more perfect, you excitedly nod at his suggestion, "Sounds nice, yeah, sure."

There's a coffee shop one block away from campus and you both exit the campus gate heading that way when a bike stops at the side of the street.

In one look, you know that it's Seungmin even though his head is hidden in a helmet. He lifts the visor and exposes his face, softly smiling at you.

You come up to him, "Seungmin? What are you doing?"

"I came to pick you up," he simply answers, then hands you a helmet.

"Come on!" He says, not asking but ordering you to get on the bike and doing it so confidently.

You remember that you were heading to get coffee with Minho, you turn to look at him while holding the helmet in front of you.

"I'm sorry but can we do coffee next time?" You ask with an apologetic smile.

Minho coyly smiles at you and shoves his hands deeper into his jeans pockets, "That's okay."

You wave bye at him before putting on the helmet and getting on the motorcycle. You feel a funny feeling seeing Minho watch as Seungmin takes you further away from him until he disappears from your sight.

-

Seungmin notices that you're slightly shivering from riding through the cold, autumn air. He holds your hands as the elevator is taking you to his floor. He looks at you with his body pushing you to one side of the elevator.

"You're freezing," he says.

"I'll be okay," you tell him.

He doesn't answer but unzips his leather jacket, putting your hands on each side of his waist next to keep them warm under his leather jacket, "Is it warm enough?"

You nod yet he proceeds to rub his hands up and down your arms. In this enclosed space, he's closing the gap between your bodies with each passing second. He can feel every breath you take and the pounding of your heart in this proximity.

"Better now?"

"Yes," you breathless reply.

His fingertips brush your cheek as they reach for your hair to tuck it behind your ear and you stifle a breath as he holds you there. The elevator chimes and interrupts the intense moment, he takes your hand to lead you to his apartment like you never went there before.

You understand why he seems giddy as he guides you further inside, he has prepared dinner for you with candles and everything.

"I just need to get the wine," he says, going to the kitchen to get it.

"We can order when we're here... why?" You're at a loss for words.

You get used to setting your expectations low so when he does a grand gesture like this, it's nothing like what you have in mind.

"I cooked the dinner," he informs.

"What? You cooked all of these?" You say in awe, looking up at him as he's filling your glass with wine and the aphrodisiac smell wafting around the room.

"Yeah," he says it like it's not a big deal.

He lights the candles on the center of the dining table, "It's a little cold now but I hope it suits your taste," he says.

It's the way he acts like he doesn't prepare all this for you that only elevates his attractiveness, Seungmin is one of a kind and it makes you want him more. His cooking suits your taste just right and it tastes as nice as the smile he's giving you the whole dinner. You feel content just from being able to have alone time with him.

"Are you working today?" You ask to make sure that no one is going to interrupt again.

"I finished early," he shortly answers.

You let out a low sigh of relief and sip your wine to wash the anxiety down your mouth. You can finally relax your shoulders and truly enjoy the moment with him.

"I have another surprise for you," he announces after wiping his mouth with a napkin.

Your heart skips a beat at the mention of surprise because it doesn't always mean good.

"Yeah?" You nervously ask.

He gets up from his chair and holds his hand out at you which you eagerly take. He takes you in the direction of his studio and slides open the door to reveal the surprise.

"Oh, my God!" You gasp.

Seungmin turned his studio into a private art exhibition where he decorated the room with white sheets hung all over the wall and images of you projected onto them.

You cringe the moment you recognize that it's you, "It's still weird seeing my own face."

"Why? You're beautiful," he says as if it's that obvious.

He leads you to the center of the room where you can see the videos he took of you playing on each side of the wall at the same time. They look like dreams from the past but in the best way, you like how it reminds you of those summer days when everything was much warmer, brighter, and less complicated.

You look down and see that he put a bed on the floor, "That's so presumptuous of you," you say as you sit down on the bed.

Seungmin is slyly smiling as he takes a seat next to you and props one hand against the bed, "Well, we don't have to do anything if you don't want to."

You turn your head to the side and get greeted by his stare, "But I want to do... anything," you say.

He's already gone as you catch his eyes staring at your lips, he looks into your eyes again to say, "That's even better."

Is it pathetic of you to say that you miss being touched by him? Well, Seungmin can see how you crumble at the faintest of his touch on you. If it wasn't a sudden invitation, you would have dressed so nicely and put on a nice pair of lingerie. From the way he looks at you with eyes wide and heavy with lust, you're thankful that the matching underwear you're wearing is flattering enough for him.

"So beautiful," he sighs with his knuckles rubbing the back of your thigh.

He leans down to kiss your neck and chest, pulling away to look at you then sighs, "So warm..."

Only using the tip of his fingers, he places fluttering touches across your chest and murmurs, "So soft..."

He then uses his mouth to make a trail of kisses down the front of your body, stopping when his lips meet the waistband of your underwear.

Seungmin doesn't hesitate to plant his nose on your clothed core and takes a sniff at it. His hand smoothly parts your leg open and keeps it open by curving his arm around it. Through the sheer fabric of your underwear, he traces the bundle of your nerves with his tongue, circling it until it's soaked with a mix of his saliva and your essence.

Impatient, he puts the underwear to the side so he can put his mouth on your wetness, lapping at it like a man with an endless thirst. Lying on the bed almost naked with his head between your legs, you bite a finger between your teeth to muffle your noises.

Seungmin knows how to make you feel good and when he thinks using his mouth is not enough, he adds his fingers to stimulate you more. Your back is arching, slowly pulsating your hips at his face and riding on his slender fingers that curl inside you, lowly moaning through your parted mouth.

"Oh, my..." you sigh with your hands now grasping the sheet under you.

Seungmin takes your hand and slips it in his hair, wanting you to tug at it. He dives deeper into your wetness, his tongue endlessly teasing your clit, and sucks on it hard that earned him a loud moan from you. As the knot tightens inside you, your legs start to press into his head but that doesn't stop him from pleasing you until you cum all over his mouth.

Seungmin drags his glistening wet mouth across your stomach and places kisses on each breast before placing his mouth on you, kissing you so deep that it takes your breath away. He leaves you gasping for air once he lets go of the kiss, going for your neck to plant kisses on the sensitive skin. His hand smoothly pulls your soaked underwear down your legs without you realizing.

You do the same by opening the buttons of his shirt, removing every piece of clothing so you can every inch of his warm skin and taut muscles.

"I dreamed of you fucking me every night," Seungmin whispers.

You giggle as his breath tickles your ear, "Do you want me to?"

He doesn't answer but turns over on the bed and you're lying on top of him, his hand glides down your spine and stops at the curve of your ass, squeezing the ample flesh there as he presses a long kiss on your lips.

Seungmin is underneath you yet you feel intimidated as you're straddling him on the bed, his eyes never straying away from yours even for a second. You begin by reaching for the clasp of your bra on your back and take it off, slowly letting it slide down your arms, then you see that his eyes are slightly faltering at the sight of your naked body sitting on top of him.

Instead of feeling shy, you get a boost of confidence from the way Seungmin admires your body with eyes that light up in fiery desire and hands that endlessly explore places that make you lustfully sigh. You put your hands on his chest and slowly, drag them down, you watch as he whimpers as your hands stop on his abdomen. Your eyes flick at his then down at his hardening member, wrapping your hand around him to slowly stroking it.

You can feel his cock pulsating with desire in your hand, so hard and so veiny, hot all over. The harder it gets, the harder you resist yourself, you take a position and angle his cock into your entrance, wetting the tip by rubbing it down your slit.

Slowly, you ease yourself down his length as a long, breathless moan falls out of your mouth, "Oh..."

You bite your lower lip, feeling overwhelmed by how good it feels to have him inside you and fill you perfectly. You whine as he is fully sheathed in your warm, velvety walls.

Seungmin grips your waist with nails that dig into the flesh. You throw all of your hair to one side and enjoy watching him struggling to calm himself down.

"Do I feel good?" You ask him.

He sucks air through his gritted teeth and closes his eyes for a moment to finally answer, "So fucking good."

Hearing that, you feel confident to continue and you start rolling your hips, back and forth, fucking him like he dreamed every night. Not enough from just watching you fucking him, Seungmin sits up so he can kiss you, putting his hands around you with his head buried between your breasts.

"Even better than my dreams," he says against your lips.

You smile and return his kisses with the same eagerness, feeling his cock engorged inside you as you clench around him. Finding yourself lost in the pleasure as well, you put your hands around his neck as support and change the pace, bouncing on his lap as everything intensifies.

Seungmin takes your breast into his mouth and sucks on it hard, making you tug at his hair at how painful yet delightful that is. He then uses his tongue to play with your nipple before letting it go, leaving your breast wet with his saliva. He looks up at you as his hands grip each side of your waist, "You keep clenching around me."

You cup his jaw and ask, "You want me to stop?"

He shakes his head, "No."

The room is quiet except for the sound of bodies and lips crashing against each other, breathless moans, and the rustles of the bedsheets that hardly cover the bed anymore. With his hand gripping the nape of your neck, he forces you to keep looking at him as you both are closing into your highs.

Your high-pitched moans clash with his low grunts the moment both of you reach your climax together. You collapse onto his shoulder while he holds you close with his arms tightly wrapped around you.

A few kisses later, he gently lays you down on the bed and slowly pulls out of you, his eyes widening seeing his cum dripping out of you. It surprises him how much he cum inside you yet he pushes his cock inside you again before laying down next to you. He kisses your lips and nestles his head in the crook of your neck.

"I feel weird now," you say.

"Why?"

"We had sex with me watching us," you say, pointing at the video playing on the walls.

"I think it's sexy," he disagrees, then kisses your lips.

He props a hand against the mattress to support his head and tenderly caresses your cheek with his knuckle, "Want to know something?"

"Yeah?"

He gives you a soft peck on your lips first before speaking, "I think that we are indeed fated to meet again."

You put your hand on his chest and thinking that it would help you tell if he's being honest, "You think so?"

His eyes filled with nothing but admiration and sincerity, softly staring into yours and making you vulnerable under him, "I think you're the one for me."

Is it a sign that he's ready to commit to you? That you'll be the one and only girl in his life? Or should you hold your breath longer?

"I like you so much," he confesses, then rests his head on your chest.

Nevertheless, you don't want to think about what's coming next. You want to focus on this euphoric feeling of hearing those words coming out of his mouth. With that, you set yourself free and float onto cloud nine.

-

No one knows what time is it because all you can see are videos of you playing on a loop on the walls. You turn to the side and see Seungmin's eyes are open for you don't know how long. He could've watched you sleeping for hours for all you know.

"What time is it?" You croak.

He kisses your shoulder and puts his hand across your chest, "To be honest, I don't know," he replies.

You sleepily chuckle and put your hand on his forearm, "Coffee?"

"Okay," he takes your request, then rolls over to hover above you, "I'll make coffee after a kiss."

A kiss turns into two then three kisses and the fourth kiss escalates things further. The next thing you know, you're fisting the sheet and being a moaning mess underneath him.

Despite the sex revives both of you more than caffeine does, Seungmin just can't start his day without making coffee. The smell is wafting around the room while you're observing his camera collection and pick up one he's lending you.

It's been a while since you haven't taken his pictures and it's just the perfect scene, he's putting on his serious face with his mouth slightly curled into an adorable pout. He glances in your direction at the sound of the camera shutters. You ignore his glare by taking more pictures of him dressed in a white t-shirt with his fluffy bedhead.

"Oh?!" You stop to check why it won't take another picture, slightly fearing that you might have accidentally broken his camera.

He takes it from you to look for the issue, "You run out of films," he simply points out.

Seungmin pours you a cup of coffee first before handling the camera, pulling open the drawer to get a tube for the film.

Before the smell of coffee makes you forget about what you planned to ask him, you look at him and ask, "My Professor is inviting me to his gathering next Saturday and I'm thinking of taking you as my plus one."

Seungmin carefully opens the back of the camera to extract the roll of film, "When is it again?"

"Next Saturday."

He unlocks his phone to check his calendar, "Sorry, I have an appointment that day," he says.

It's not like you expected him to agree to socialize with your Professor. Just a tad disappointed but you understand that he's busy.

"That's okay," you assure him with a smile.

He puts down his phone next to his cup of coffee and takes the tube of films with him, "I'll put this to develop later."

His phone still lights up when he leaves for the studio and you don't mean to be nosy, but it's sitting there so you drag it close enough to see his schedule.

Kayla. 8 pm. Hotel Seville. That's what is written on his schedule for next Saturday. Before he notices that you're snooping in, you lock the phone and put it back next to his coffee cup. He returns to the kitchen, placing a kiss on your cheek as he walks past you before sitting on his stool.

"That looks good on you," he says, eyeing the shirt you're wearing which is the same one he wore last night.

"Yeah, it's comfortable," you reply with a smile.

"You can have it."

"I was planning to steal it anyway," you jokingly say.

Maybe you were over your head to think that what he said is a sign or maybe it is a sign for you to take a deep, deep breath and prepare yourself to hold it in longer this time.

-

The silence lets you dive further into your head and bathe yourself into your thoughts. Deeper and deeper, you're slowly drowning yourself in it until someone pulls you out of the water, taking you back to the real world that is just as harsh and as cold.

"I know I'll find you here," Minho says.

You thinly smile at him and shut the book you're hardly reading, "What's up?"

Minho puts his backpack down on the floor and joins you to sit at the other end of the window sill, it's your favorite spot in the library, "Did you fail another test or do you always look this terrible?"

If your head wasn't so centered around Seungmin, you would have come with a funny retort. You can only scoff and act like it doesn't bother you, to be honest, the only thing that bothers you is Seungmin.

"So, who are you going to take tomorrow?" You ask to shift the topic and your mind altogether.

The gathering is tomorrow which reminds you of the preparation that is still at zero. You haven't found a dress to wear and worse is no one to go with.

Minho fixes the collar of his coat as he says, "I don't think anyone wants to go with me."

That's a lie. The truth is a lot of girls are dying to ask him out and one of them would be more than glad to go with him if they weren't intimidated by his indifferent attitude, his smart mouth that only speaks harsh truth, and a brain that matches the size of his ego. The safe bet is Minho thinks that no girl is worthy enough to go with him.

"How about you?" He asks back.

"I'm taking myself," you answer with a dry laugh.

Minho sharply inhales air through his teeth and shoves his hands into his coat pockets, "Why don't we go together?"

Does it mean you're worthy enough for him? And why does that make you feel somehow... flattered? You look at him in suspicion, trying to guess what he is actually thinking when he asks you that. You eventually give up reading his inscrutable expression.

"But why?"

"Why not?" He asks back instead of answering.

You awkwardly laugh as you put your books back into your bag. There are no written rules where you can't take another guest as your plus one and he's right, why not?

"Yeah, sure," you take on his offer, "I'll meet you there."

It's not like Seungmin is going to mind you're going with Minho.

-

With Rina's help, you found a black dress with an appropriate length to wear to the gathering. She also lends her dainty earrings and high heels to match with it. You hold on to your coat as the cold slowly seeps into you as you walk on the pavement leading to Professor Lim's house.

From afar, you can see that his house lights up brighter than the other house, and cars are parked along his side of the street. You're fifteen minutes early from the appointed time but intellectuals always come early if not punctual. You pick up the speed of your walking when you see Minho standing outside.

"Why are you here?" You ask.

"I'm invited."

You snort hearing his answer, "I mean, why you’re not inside?"

"I'm waiting for you," he answers, a curl of steam escaping his mouth, and tells you he must have been waiting long outside.

"It's cold. You can wait for me inside!" You scold, taking him by the elbow to climb the steps and knock on the door.

Not long after, someone opens the door and greets you, "Hello, I'm Kevin, I'm Professor Lim's husband."

His marital status shocks you more than knowing about his sexual preference and you take his hand for a handshake, "Nice to meet you!"

Minho takes his turn to shake his hand and Kevin is surprised by his cold hands, "It's cold outside. Come in! Come in!"

After taking off his coat, Minho helps you take off yours and does it carefully so as not to ruin your hair which Rina spent almost an hour to style.

"Thank you," you mutter as you turn around.

He freezes for a moment just looking at you before he can say something, "You look nice!"

You're not used to gentleman Minho who knows how to treat a girl. You look at him to give you an idea of what you should compliment on him.

"And you look... not bad," you praise.

Honestly, Minho looks dashing tonight. He wears a black suit and a crisp white shirt, the suit jacket perfectly suits him, showcasing the broadness of his shoulders and the dark slacks enhance the length of his legs.

It's a polite thing to do to greet the host of the gathering and thank him for the invitation. Professor Lim looks more lively tonight than he looks when he's in his class.

"Please write down your answer for the quiz tonight," He says.

Every guest has to write down their answer to the same question. You and Minho take a card each to write your answer and read the question above already written on it.

"The person you would most like to have dinner with real or imagined, living or dead is..."

You know the exact answer that would please Professor Lim since he talks a lot about his favorite writer.

"George Sand," you and Minho say in unison and break into laughter together.

You check everyone else's answer on the big crystal bowl and see that a few of them have written the same answer, it's either George Sand or her full real name just for added impression.

You decide to skip on writing your answer, "I'm going to get a drink."

Minho also ditches his card and follows you, finding the waiter who carries a tray of drinks around the room. He grabs two champagne flutes and hands one to you.

"I always wanted to see his book collection," you tell Minho.

He confoundedly shifts his eyes to the big shelf full of books behind you, "And those are not books?"

You take a small sip of your wine, "He has a study room upstairs and it's off-limit to guests," you lowly whisper.

Minho looks around and spots that the host is busy talking to a group of people and his husband is walking around making sure everyone is enjoying the food.

"Well... it's not exactly off-limits," he says, taking you by the hand and sneaking up the stairs as everyone else is busy socializing.

Professor Lim's study room is located on the third floor, it is supposed to be the attic but he turns it into a big study room and you guessed it correctly, that's where he keeps his dear books. Without turning on the lights, you use the flashlight on your phone to scan the titles of the books, they're well-preserved first editions.

"Oh!" Minho suddenly gasps from the other side of the room.

You turn around and find him cradling a bottle of brandy, it's half full and looks very expensive.

"Let's have a party on our own," he says with mischief written all over his face.

You usually steer yourself away from problems but you really don't want to go back downstairs and try to socialize, talking about intellectual stuff. You just want to dull your mind with alcohol. Minho pushes the window and takes the drink with him, leaving you with no choice but to follow him, hanging out by the roof of your Professor's house.

"Why are we drinking on the roof? It's cold and high, it's a disaster waiting to happen," you tell him.

He holds his hand out at you, "I brought the blanket from his chair," he says, showing you the plaid quilt blanket.

You sit next to him and resist looking down, "And about the height?"

He wraps you with the blanket, then puts his arm around you, "I'll keep you safe."

"Ugh!" You groan in disgust and shrug his hand away from your shoulder.

He laughs and uncaps the bottle of brandy, from the smell of it you can tell the alcohol percentage in it. He takes the first sip, then winces at the bitter aftertaste.

"We share the bottle?" You ask as you take the bottle from him.

"We can't use the glass and leave evidence, right?"

You sigh and reluctantly take a small sip of it, aware of how much alcohol it contains. You hurriedly hand it back to him.

"Let's be honest..." you say.

"Okay."

"What's your real answer?"

"Answer to what?"

"Professor Lim's quiz," you answer.

Minho takes a longer sip this time and prepares himself for the aftertaste, gasping once he swallows it down. He takes another moment to think of an answer.

"Tolstoy," he answers.

As expected, his answer would be one of the Russian writers. You take your turn to drink and hand it back to him quickly.

"You?"

"Since we're being honest, I'd say... Howl Pendragon," you say with a smile.

Minho gives you a judgemental look and sips the brandy without any expression whatsoever.

"We can have dinner on his moving castle and if I'm lucky, I get to meet Calcifer too," you defend your answer.

"Whatever," he comments, followed by a thick cloud of steam.

You decide to share the blanket with him, scooting closer to him and covering his back with it. You cling to the sleeve of his suit jacket and smile, "I have to hold on to something so I won't fall."

Now that the silence resides between you and him, you can see the view from the roof, mostly the university complex and the clock tower in the middle.

"If we were being honest..." Minho says, "My answer would be you."

You look at him and in this proximity, you can smell his alcohol-tinted breath, "You're drunk already."

"No... not really," he vaguely answers, then shrugs.

"Well, you can simply ask me to dinner," you tell him, "It's not like we never had dinner together before."

He gazes into your eyes and asks, "Then what about your boyfriend?"

"My boyfriend is... not really my boyfriend," you cryptically say.

"What does that mean?" He narrows his eyes at you.

You blame the alcohol for loosening you up and let your words unfiltered, "We're in an open relationship."

"So...?"

"So, he's seeing another girl as we speak," you continue.

"That's—"

"We'd better get back," you quickly end the conversation before he can dig more personal things out of you.

Drunk you is dangerous but drunk Minho is way more dangerous. You take the bottle of brandy from him, it's wise for the two of you to stop drinking. You cap the bottle and get up first, helping him walk back into the study room, then put the bottle back where it belongs.

Safely make it back downstairs undetected, you look at Minho and he looks fine, it looks as if he didn't drink a drop of alcohol.

"I need to eat something to soak the alcohol with," he excuses himself to leave your side.

Okay, maybe he is drunk yet you regret telling him about Seungmin and the open relationship thing.

In the middle of Professor Lim's reading the answer to his quiz, you decide to leave early and thank Kevin on the way out. As you collect your coat by yourself, Minho appears from behind you, taking his coat that hangs next to yours.

"Let me drive you home," he sounds as demanding as usual.

You chuckle at him, "On your bicycle?"

"No, I'm taking a car tonight," he says.

Minho isn't joking, he's driving a car tonight and you're sitting on the passenger's side, looking at his hands holding the steering wheel. This time, you conclude that it's not about how hard he grips the steering wheel, Minho simply has veiny arms and you remind yourself to look away before it gets creepy.

"The crab cakes helped you sober up, huh?" You joke.

"I stole a few slices of bread from Professor Lim's kitchen actually," he jokes back.

"Bread absorbs alcohol faster, noted."

The ride shouldn't last this long but at the same time, you don't want it to end. In this space and silence you're sharing with Minho, you feel inexplicably comfortable and safe.

"Do you have plans for winter break?" He asks.

"No."

"You're not going to your parents for holidays?" He glances at you for a second before looking straight ahead at the road.

"They're going out of the country to celebrate it with my sister and their in-law," you answer.

Minho doesn't respond but steadily taps the steering wheel with his fingers.

"What about you?"

He drops one hand and rests it on his thigh, "My parents live not too far away from the city so... you'll see me around."

"Oh, how lovely!" You meant to make it a snide comment, but you say it in a sweet tone.

Your apartment comes to sight and Minho slows the car down before pulling to the side of the street and stops the car altogether.

You unclasp the safety belt and hold your purse close to your chest, "Thank you for the lift home!"

Minho turns off the car engine, then turns his head to the side, "No problem."

Weirdly, you don't feel like getting out of the car, it's warm and quiet in here, and you're not ready to step out into the cold yet.

"Thank you for being my plus one," you add.

"Likewise," he says back.

Your cheeks are heating and you're blaming the car heater for it, not because Minho can't stop staring at you.

"I.. uh-" you lost your train of thought and quickly recover yourself, "I'll see you around."

You're about to push the car door open when he suddenly grabs your elbow. You put your hand away from the handle of the door and turn to face, "Yes?"

"Can I..." His words trail off and he swallows air instead of continuing his sentence.

You chuckle seeing him so confused and flustered all at once, "Are you still drunk?"

Minho lets out a chuckle, "Maybe."

"Want me to drive you home then?"

"Yeah," he playfully answers.

"To be honest, I am slightly drunk to drive a car," you answer, half-laughing.

In the space filled with both of your waves of laughter, your eyes meet and he's leaning in, closer and closer until his lips land on yours.

Minho glides his soft lips on yours, warm and wet, hot breath filling your mouth as you let him taste you more. His hand holds the side of your face with his thumb tenderly caressing your cheek. The kiss is everything you expect to feel when you kiss someone you like. Your heart is fluttering, you feel a tingle inside you and your chest is overflowed with warm feelings.

However, the kiss makes you realize something.

You pull away until Minho's hand slips away from your cheek.

"Goodnight, Minho," you sadly say.

Without looking at him, you step out of his car and into the cold that seeps into your bones, freezes your heart, and makes you numb.

-

Seungmin rarely calls you twice in an hour when he usually calls you at certain times just to keep you on your toes. You've been thinking out loud by the time you reel yourself back to reality, you notice you have two missed calls on your phone. You hit call back and he picks up right away on the second ring, that's also a rare occurrence.

"Hey, sorry, I was in the bathroom," you lie because it's easier.

You hear him sigh, then say, "I miss you."

That's another rare occurrence. He usually says those words after you say them first to him.

"Miss you too," you hate to admit but it's true.

"You sound unwell. Are you okay?" Seungmin asks with a concerned voice.

Even through your voice, he can sense something is going on with you. You lick your lips and lie again, "It's the cold weather."

He lowly gasps then says, "You better dressed warmly. I don't want you to get sick."

"Okay," you immediately comply but you can't find it in you to engage in a long conversation with him, "so, why did you call me?"

"I can't call my girlfriend because I miss her?" He sweetly says.

Seungmin knows how to make you weak on the knees and you hate that you always fall for his sweet words.

"So that's it? You miss me?" You play along with him.

He laughs and you also hate how your heart rattles at the sound of his crisp laugh, "I'm taking you to dinner tomorrow."

"Just the two of us?" You naively ask.

"No," he answers, "A director of a gallery invited me to their dinner party."

"Oh. How nice!" You hope he can't hear the fake enthusiasm in your voice.

"Also, I have something to tell you," he says.

"You can't tell me now?" You're not in the mood to play along anymore.

"I have to tell you in person," he replies.

"Okay," you get used to setting your expectations low for him and you keep it that way.

"It's something good," he assures you.

"I hope so," you reply.

He thinks you're being playful and chuckles at it, "I'll pick you up tomorrow."

"Okay."

"Stay warm and take care."

"Better be something I haven't seen before as well," you give in to the temptation of teasing him.

"Okay," he playfully copies you.

The next day, you start dressing for the dinner party, wearing a dress you borrowed from Rina while she's busy packing to go home for winter break.

"Want me to help you with your hair?" She offers.

"No, I can't make you miss your flight," you kindly refuse.

You don't put too much makeup on and brush your hair, securing it with bobby pins to keep it neat.

"My taxi is here!" Rina announces.

You run out of your room to bid her bye, "Sorry I can't help you with your suitcases!"

She hugs you but not too tight to not wrinkle the dress, "It's okay. I'll just roll them down the stairs."

You're watching from the window as she waves at you before getting into the taxi. You get back to getting ready, putting your stuff into your purse and Seungmin rings the doorbell right on time.

"Whoa!" He exclaims the second he sees you.

"Come in. I just need to put my shoes on," you inform.

"Wait, wait," he stops you from walking away and pulls you close, leaning in to kiss you.

With your hand on his chest, you gently push him away and say, "We're going to be late."

He ignores your words and kisses you, forcing you to lower your guard down to let himself in again. His kiss heals but also breaks, nothing in between.

"God, I miss you so much," he sighs as he pulls away from the kiss.

You smile at his words and drop your hands to the side, "I still have to get my shoes."

Relentless, he pecks your lips before letting you go. You get a pair of Rina's black heels to match your dress and put them on with one hand against the wall.

"Where's your roommate?" Seungmin asks.

"She's going home for the winter break," you answer and go to your bedroom to retrieve your purse.

"So, you'll be alone in here?"

"Why? Does it give you ideas?" You tease.

"A lot of ideas," he shortly replies and does not hesitate to kiss you again.

The make-out session you had on your couch is what caused you both to be late for the dinner party. You fix your make-up on the car ride and thankfully, they're in the middle of an appetizer when you arrive.

Seungmin introduces you to the one who invited him, "This is Kayla, the director of Rostam Gallery."

"Oh?" You exclaim a little too excitedly. This is the Kayla he met that night Seungmin was supposed to come with you to Professor Lim's gathering.

"It's nice to meet you and thank you for letting me join in," you tell her as you shake her hand.

"The more the merrier," she says, then leads you to the dining room where the other guests have seated around the big round table.

Seungmin gentlemanly pulls the chair for you and takes the seat next to you after, the waiters immediately serve appetizers for both of you even though everyone else is almost finished with theirs.

The lady sitting next to you keeps making remarks about the china and you eventually find out that she's a ceramic artist. You engage in a conversation with her while the rest of the guests are in a heated discussion about some post-modern art pieces.

Seungmin checks on you every once in a while to make sure you feel comfortable, he holds your hand under the table and smiles as he asks, "Okay?

You dab your mouth with a napkin and answer, "The food is delicious. Can't complain!"

The guy sitting next to him leaning forward on the table to take a good look at you, "Seungmin, are you keeping this beautiful lady away from me on purpose?" He says.

You politely smile at him and Seungmin leans back on his chair to introduce you to him, "This is Jim, a journalist."

Jim offers his hand for a handshake and you briefly shake it as you introduce yourself.

"She's my girlfriend," Seungmin adds at the end of the introduction.

Jim seems to be surprised hearing that and smiles at you, "You got yourself uh... a beautiful girlfriend, Seungmin!" He says in a mix of awe and shock.

Seungmin glances at you and smiles, "I know," he confidently responds.

The conversation at the table has changed into great works of Spanish artists and Seungmin is intently listening to everyone talking about it so passionately that he is not aware of his phone buzzing inside the inside pocket of his suit jacket.

You lean in close to let him know, "Seungmin, your phone is ringing."

He reaches inside to check his phone and decides to excuse himself to take the call. The waiter is done serving the dessert and you take your fork to start digging into the decadent-looking chocolate cake.

"I'm sorry about earlier," Jim says, leaning into Seungmin's seat.

You refrain from eating and put the fork down, "Sorry for what?"

"I didn't know that you're Seungmin's girlfriend," he answers.

It gives you the impression that Seungmin's way of dating is public knowledge. All these times, these people think that you're just one of Seungmin's "girl-friend" and not his actual girlfriend whom he's dating.

You manage to put on a smile and say, "That's alright."

"Oh, you must be happy about Seungmin," he shares without context.

"Pardon?"

"Oh, he hasn't told you about the exhibition he's going to hold abroad?"

You slightly shake your head, "No."

"When is the exhibition?" You hesitantly ask.

"Next month," Jim shortly answers.

That means Seungmin is going abroad for it and he doesn't tell you about it. It's embarrassing that he declares you as his girlfriend but you get to hear about him from someone else.

Seungmin returns to his seat at the right time but he seems to acknowledge the chat you had with him, "Jim, you're not trying to steal her from me, right?"

Jim snorts in response, "As if I had the chance against you!"

You return to your dessert and dig your fork at it, cutting a piece of it on the beautiful china. Before you take it into your mouth, you look around at the people sitting on the dining table and think that they're right, you're only his plus-one and nothing more.

As everyone getting too drunk from wine and the night is getting late, Seungmin decides that it's time to leave. You leave for the bathroom and come back to him talking to a girl who's sitting next to Jim. They look rather friendly and she kisses both of his cheeks before she goes back to the dining room.

Seungmin smiles when he notices you're coming his way, he has your coat and purse in his hand.

"Ready to go home?" He holds the coat and puts it on for you, fixing your hair afterward.

You grab the purse from him as you mutter your gratitude, "Yes."

The constant hum of the car heater is what you can hear on the whole car ride as you stare out the window with your head filled with so many thoughts you can't pick one and try to assess it.

Seungmin squeezes your hand and makes you turn your head at him, "You're so quiet."

You thinly smile and think of something to say, "Don't you say you have something you want to tell me?"

He quickly glances at you before looking straight ahead, "Yeah, but I'll tell you once we get home."

"Is it about the exhibition?" You don't mean to spoil it from him but you feel sick the longer you hold it to yourself.

He looks rather surprised that you know about it, "Yes and there's another thing," he says.

"That you will be leaving the country for it?"

He awkwardly smiles, "Yes, but—"

"How did you do it?" You cut him off.

"How did I do what?" He asks in confusion.

There's no going back once you let everything out of your chest but this is it, you're done trying to control your feelings when it's your right to feel angry about what he's doing to you.

You turn on your seat to face him and ask, "How did you kiss some other girls and not feel guilty about it?"

Seungmin decides to pull the car to the side of the road and stops the engine. He looks at you and asks again, "What is it? What is wrong?"

You're tired of swallowing things down and trying to understand when he doesn't even try to do the same for you, "I kissed another guy the other night," you confess.

"And I feel horrible... I feel so bad about it because it feels like I'm cheating on you," you croak with tears getting in between the words.

You shut your eyes tight for a moment to fight the tears from coming out of you but it's a fruitless effort, "What I'm asking is how did you do it? Kissing other girls and not feeling like you betrayed me?"

Seungmin's mouth is agape but no words coming out of it. There's only a sigh and eyes that stare back into your glassy eyes.

"How did you do it?" You raise your voice that it's echoing in the small space of his car. Even with your eyes blurry with tears, you can see that he has no answer to your question.

"You don't even seem to be mad about me kissing another guy."

Tears won't stop coming down your face and you feel a lump blocking you from talking.

You take a deep breath but all it does is make you feel aches inside, "Am I really your girlfriend? Do I mean something to you?"

For the first time in your life, you don't want to know the answer. You unclasp your safety belt, grab your purse, and get out of the car. The cold slaps you in the face with the harsh cold air and you hurriedly hailing your hand to get a taxi, wanting to get as far away from him as possible.

From your peripheral vision, you see Seungmin getting out of the car and is about to walk up to you when a taxi stops right in front of you. You immediately get yourself inside and tell the driver to drive, leaving a trail of pieces of broken your heart as you go.

-

You find yourself in front of Minho's apartment an hour later.

It's unclear why you decided to come here but deep down, you know why. It's been days since you both kissed and you haven't said anything to him about it.

Minho probably thinks you hate him or that the kiss was a wrong move on his part when the truth is... the kiss is what you needed to take you back into reality. You knock on his door and wait in anticipation, afraid that he's already leaving for the holidays. After a while, you hear footsteps and someone unlocks the door.

Minho opens the door just enough to show himself and he looks surprised to see you. You're not aware of how miserable you must have looked with your ruined makeup and red, puffy eyes.

"The kiss was right," you tell him before losing yourself in the sadness again.

He opens the door wider to let you in, "Hey, why don't you come—"

"The kiss was nice, the kiss was everything I hoped for and I realize that I do like you, Minho," you admit with a voice that quivers from the cold.

You lick your lips and look at him, "But I also hate it. The kiss... the kiss made me realize that I... I deserve better."

The lump in your throat appears again and it turns into a hot coal as you resist letting yourself cry again.

"That I deserve someone who treats me right, special... someone who doesn't make me feel insecure all the time, someone better, someone..."

Fresh tears roll down your cheeks again and it feels hot on your cheeks after walking a block in the cold.

"Someone like you," you finish your sentence.

You look at him against the hot tears that can't stop pooling in your eyes no matter how much you wipe them with the back of your hands, "But it feels like my heart is no longer a part of my body, I can't–I can't control it, Minho," you say in a frustrated tone.

You close your eyes because what you're about you say next is painful to admit, "I can't stop it. My heart wants him."

You break into sobs the moment Minho pulls you into his hug.

From hundreds of books you've read in your life, it's impossible to find the answers to this: If the heart is no longer part of your body then how can you still feel it aches inside your chest?

-

Seungmin knows that one night is enough time and space he gave you. He knows that if he lets it on too long, he'll lose you and he doesn't want that.

He hits the speed limit as he rides his bike to go to your place and knock on your door only to be answered by disappointment. He calls your phone but you don't pick up, he tries knocking on the door only to get disappointed again.

As a last effort, he hits the call button again and leans against the door of your apartment. He turns around and sees someone he knows, he has seen him with you before.

"You're her friend, aren't you?" Seungmin confidently guesses.

Minho stops at the top of the stairs and stays there, "Yes."

"She's not home. Do you have any ideas where she might be?" Seungmin asks, taking a step closer to him.

Even in this proximity, Seungmin can tell that he knows the answer but he can't decide whether to tell him or not.

"I'm not sure," Minho answers and he turns around to walk down the stairs.

It seems that he decided to do the third option and that is lying about his answer. Seungmin follows him down the stairs and tries to get an answer from him.

"I know that you know," Seungmin says from behind him.

"You're her boyfriend. You should know," Minho nonchalantly says while keeps walking down the stairs with hands shoved inside his coat pockets.

Seungmin sighs to calm himself down but asking him kindly is not working, so he tries another way, "And I know you're the guy she kissed."

Minho lands on the base of the stairs, takes another step, and turns around on his feet, "So? What are you going to do about it?"

Seungmin hates this brazen, flippant attitude and if there's one good thing about it, he knows that he is just a passing fancy for you.

"Nothing," he simply answers Minho's question.

Seungmin walks the rest of the steps and stops right in front of him, "Because I know she likes me better than you!"

Minho tilts his head to meet his stare and laughs, he licks his lips before talking right into his face, "But I treat her better than you."

That gets on Seungmin's nerves that he grabs fistfuls of Minho's sweater and pulls him close, "You know nothing. Your words mean nothing to me. Just tell me where she is!"

Minho takes his hands and puts them away from him, "You don't deserve her. Why would I tell you where she is so you can break her heart again and again?" He raises his voice louder than him.

The first one, he let it go but this is his second strike and he makes the third strike when Minho decides to leave him behind. Seungmin just can't allow this anymore, he chases him outside and pulls him by his coat.

In the next second, it turns into a childish fight of pushing and shoving each other, making a scene that the passerby can't ignore anymore. Minho lets go first and takes a few steps back away from Seungmin.

"If you want to play around and date as many girls as you want, just let her go! You don't deserve her!" Minho shouts at him.

Seungmin is going at him but a stranger holding him back by his arms, "You know nothing!"

Minho yanks his arms away from the people who broke away from their fight and comes up at Seungmin, "I know everything! She went to my place last night and told me everything!"

Minho lowers his voice to not let people hear what he's saying, "You know what? She's right about everything. You didn't even mad about me kissing her."

Seungmin's heart drops that Minho indeed knows about everything. He feels it now, the betrayal. This is how you must've felt last night.

"And you're about to leave her too, right? You're going out of the country, running away from commitment like you always do," Minho says with a snide smile.

"Fuck you!" Seungmin curses out of anger, "I'm not running away from her."

People are coming to break the fight again but Seungmin tells them to stay back. He calms himself down by taking a deep breath and looks at Minho again, "I'm taking her with me and I was about to ask her if she wants to go with me when she suddenly admitted to kissing you!"

Minho looks away and lets out a snarky laugh, "You think a vacation will fix everything?"

"No," Seungmin answers while daringly looking into his eyes, "but I planned on telling her that I'm ready to commit to her."

The smirk on Minho's face gradually fades and his jaws clenched, probably holding in the urge to go at him. But he knows he has no right to prevent him from seeing you.

Minho goes for his bike parked next to the bench and Seungmin hopelessly follows him, "So, please, tell me where I can find her!"

Minho unlocks his bike and walks it to the side of the road, he turns to look at him and considers whether to tell him or not.

-

It's like someone has punctured your lungs, no matter how much you breathe, you keep losing air. If anything, you find it hard to breathe.

You look down at the ducks swimming on the pond, munching on the pieces of bread you throw onto the pond and it's floating on the surface of water.

You feel jealous at how easy things are for them, they only have to follow the natural law of finding their mates and procreate. No rules, no games, no tricks, no complications, no heartache. It's as simple as that.

You throw the plastic bag into the trash bin and think of taking a walk around the park before heading back home. It's cold for a walk but it's better than wallowing things in your room, all alone.

White steam escapes your mouth as you let out a sigh and rub your hands together to keep them warm when you feel a hand grab you by the shoulder.

You look over your shoulder and see the last person you want to see, Seungmin.

"Why are you out in this cold?" He asks, taking his gloves off so he can put them on you.

You take your hands away and sadly tell him "It's too late for that, Seungmin."

He ignores your words and slips his glove into your hand, "I'll always care for you."

"And for other girls too, apparently," you add.

Seungmin holds your gloved hands in his and waits until you look him in the eyes before speaking, it takes a minute until you eventually trapped yourself in his gaze.

"You didn't let me talk last night," he says.

"That won't change a thing. I'll never understand you, what you want..." you tell him.

This time, you put on a tough face and even tougher heart, you have cried enough for him. You refuse to cry again for him.

"I'm not a stop along the way, Seungmin. I'm a destination. I want you for me and me only but if you want to keep going and see where it takes you, then I beg you to please let me go," you rest your case with a steadfast heart.

"You either stay or leave and I'm afraid this is your only chance to decide," you give him the ultimatum and turn the table back to him.

It feels lighter now that you have let everything out of you and both decisions would cost you pain but it's worth knowing the answer to this.

"Can I talk now?" Seungmin asks and you must admit that he puts on a different kind of serious expression than the one he makes whenever he's making coffee.

It's only fair that you listen to what he needs to say, so you nod and let him talk.

"Last night, I was going to tell you about the exhibition and that I'll be leaving soon to prepare it," he begins.

He fiercely looks into your eyes as he steadily holds your hands, "then you left before I got the chance to say about the things I really wanted to tell you."

You swallow air and feel a pang of guilt inside you. You did act selfishly last night, you can see it now after he pointed it out to you.

Seungmin takes something from the inner pocket of his leather jacket, flight tickets, two of them. He shows it to you and smiles, "I was about to ask you if you want to go with me."

He inhales air before continuing to talk, "I'll be working most of the time but I think of us spending Christmas and New Year together..." he pauses to sniff from the cold air, "And I can't think of spending it with anyone else but you."

He pits the tickets back into his leather jacket pocket and shifts his focus back on you again, "I know you must have been so confused with this open relationship thing but if you give me more time, I know I'll be more certain with my feelings."

He squeezes your hands to emphasize how much he means his words, "Give me one more chance to prove it to you, to show you that I want to stay."

It's so hard with his eyes softly gazing into your eyes and they're warm and earnest, he's so open and honest with you. But you can't find the answer in him, you have to look into your heart and ask it if it's still what it wants.

There's only one way to find out.

"Can I kiss you?"

"Yes, with pleasure," Seungmin replies with an enthusiastic smile.

You take a step closer and close the gap of your bodies. You lean in and kiss him, letting yourself immerse in it to get what you want.

This time, the kiss will neither heal nor break you. This time, the kiss will tell you the answer.

-

The last time Minho saw you, you were putting in your suitcase into the trunk of a taxi and that was when he told himself that it was time to wave the white flag.

Frankly, he admitted defeat when he told Seungmin where to find you, that you must be feeding the ducks by the pond and it seemed to be leading you to agree on going away with Seungmin for the holidays.

It's what your heart wants and Minho only helped you get it.

There's a week left in winter break but snow has just started piling on the pavement he walks on. Minho wraps himself in layers of clothes and shields himself from the cold by hugging himself while listening to the crunch of the snow as he steps on it.

The plan is to return some books he borrowed over the holidays and let the librarian lady take care of them as he browses for more books to borrow.

Something tells him that he needs to check somewhere where he knows that he'll only meet disappointment. Yet he follows his heart and lets it take him to where you usually would be.

Minho almost laughs because of how vivid the imagery is. He sees you there, sitting on the big window sill with your feet pulled up and your breath fogging the glass.

Wait... does Minho see what he wants to see or is it real? Either way, he thinks his eyes are playing tricks on him so he refuses to believe, turning around on his heels.

The sound of your voice calling his name shatters his doubts, "Minho?"

It takes him a moment to get himself together and turns around to answer your call, "Yes?"

Now that he sees your smile and it's aimed toward him, he no longer thinks his eyes are playing tricks. It is what it is, it's you, right there and he's walking towards that smile.

"I thought you're still on holiday," You say and hold your book close to your chest with your hand covering the front of the book, he can't see the title.

It should be him asking that question. Shouldn't you be in another country and spend the rest of the winter break with your boyfriend?

"You know me. I like seeing books more than seeing my family," he half-heartedly says with a sheepish smile.

"Roasting yourself, huh? That's new," you say with a low laugh.

The view outside the window of tree branches covered in the show makes a picturesque background as you put your feet down the window sill but all he sees is you.

"I haven't had breakfast," you suddenly share.

"Why not?" He asks back.

"I have nothing in my fridge so I only had coffee," you answer while looking up with eyes that shine for him, "Do you have anything in your fridge I can eat?"

It takes no genius that you're asking him to cook breakfast for you but it would be stupid of him to pass the chance.

"No," Minho answers, then hoists the strap of his bag higher on his shoulder, "But I can cook them for you."

-

It's almost noon to be considered a breakfast so Minho cooks lunch for two while you're playing with his cats on the carpeted floor.

"I'm fun when I'm sober, right?" You coo at the eldest of his three cats, softly scratching her belly with your fingers.

He silently watches from the kitchen as he prepares the table smiling without him realizing it. He snaps himself out of it and announces, "Lunch is ready!"

You get up from the floor and dash to the sink to wash your hands, pulling a chair from the dining table and sitting on it. You take a whiff of the steaming bowl of soup Minho cooked and hum in delight, "Whoa. Smells so good!"

Minho sits on his chair after getting a pitcher of water to the table and he sees that you're waiting for him to start eating, "Aren't you hungry?"

"Thank you for the food!" You say in gratitude and with that being said, you pick up your spoon to start eating.

Maybe it's the cold weather, maybe it's the hot soup that he's eating, but Minho feels warm, inside and out. He believes it's mostly because he's enjoying the company he's with who's heartily eating the food he cooked.

"I ate too much pie and cookies at Rina's," you share out of the blue.

"Rina's?" He asks with a puzzled look on his face.

You nod and put down your spoon to drink your water, "Where did you think I spent the holidays?"

That gets him thinking for a moment. What answer should he give you? An honest one where he thought you went away with your boyfriend and possibly admits that he got a little heartbroken about it or play it cool like he usually does?

"I saw you leaving with your suitcase so I thought..." he skips on finishing his sentence.

"Ah..." you take another sip of your water and put the glass down.

"Well, that was me going to the airport to crash Rina's family's Christmas," you sheepishly answer.

Minho doesn't know how to say it without getting his hopes up yet he dares himself to ask, "You didn't go with him?"

Your eyes are nowhere looking at him but he sees a sad, profound smile on your face, then you shake your head, "He may be what my heart wants but he's not what I need."

In that moment, something is filling his chest, something warm, something that makes him feel like he can finally breathe again. Minho is hopeful once again.

"For the record, I offered to help with the dishes," you tell him, placing a mug of coffee you made for him on the kitchen counter.

Minho dries his hands with a cloth before leaning against the kitchen counter next to you and sipping his coffee, watching his cat lying under the hazy sunlight coming through the window.

He steals glances at you and hesitates to ask how you're feeling about your unexpected decision, "How are you doing?"

You inhale the air before answering, "I'm doing better than I expected actually."

Minho doesn't even think about how things will be going from here but hearing that you're doing fine puts him at ease. He has so many things to say but it's wise for him to not rush things, he's certain that you still need time.

You turn your head to look at him and say, "I've just finished reading something this week and it surprised me how much I enjoyed it."

You have one hand on your chest while the other holding your coffee mug, "It's a play and there's this line that deeply resonates with me."

The way you stare into his eyes enchants him to stare back into yours, there's a space between your bodies but looking eyes to eyes like this makes him feel closer to you in a sense.

"It says... 'If ever my life can be of any use to you, come and claim it.'."

Minho recognizes the lines right away. It's from one of his favorite writers. He gets flustered and smiles, "You read Russian literature now, huh?"

"Yeah, guess I'll be as boring as you now," You softly laugh and put down your mug on the counter next to him.

"I think it's my time to leave," you put your hands on the edge of the counter and accidentally nudged him.

Minho doesn't want to let you go again so he holds you by the fingers and looks into your eyes. His mouth gets ahead of his brain when he blurts out, "Stay."

He holds more of your hand in his and brings himself closer to you. With eyes that look deeper into your eyes and a heart that knows what it wants, Minho says, "I want you to stay."

He sees the doubt and fears in your eyes, he would understand if you chose to leave, and for once in his life, it's okay for him to lose to you.

To his surprise, you hold his hand back and say, "Well, why don't you come and claim it?"

If Minho knew that all he had to do was to come and claim it, he would have done it sooner. But right now is not too late so he closes the gap between your bodies and puts his hand on the side of your face.

With such love, he cups your cheek and swipes his thumb across your lips which he dreamed of kissing a million times, asleep or awake. This is not a dream yet you still feel like one.

The moment your lips meet again, it thaws his heart and his worried mind. He pulls you close and puts his heart closer to yours, two hearts beating as one with mere flesh and bones in between.

You are of words that create a poem and the sentiment it has between the lines, you are the allusion in his written life in which Minho has now come and claimed.

-

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taglist: @svintsandghosts @abiaswreck @septicrebel @cursed-mars-bars @ppiri-bahng @drhsthl @tangylemonade @bluenights1899 @thisisnotstraight88 @elizalabs3 @avyskai @is2cb97 @simeonswhore @marvelous-llama @linovely @jisungsleftcheek @hanjisbeloved @luvsskzs @knowleeknow @army-stay-noel @djeniryuu @bigsobs4skz @toplinehyunjin @channies-luv @foxinnie8 @biribarabiribbaem @dalamjisung @moasworld @sherryblossom @fawnpeaks @lukeys-giggle @obeythemasters @primoppang @devilsmatches @skz-streamer @freckleboilix @idkluvutellme @laylasbunbunny @cherry-edibles @cutiespaghetti @yourmercibeaucoupsblog @hanjisunginc

[harunayuuka2060]

MC: *feeding Luke*

Luke: *his cheeks puffing whenever he chews the food*

MC: *feels satisfaction that he's now fully-recovered*

Luke: MC?

MC: ?

Luke: Can I visit you in the House Of Lamentation?

MC: ...

MC: Luke, you know you're always free to go there.

Luke: *smiles* Because it's been a while.

MC: ...

MC: I'm sorry.

Luke: Why are you apologizing? I didn't say that to make you feel guilty.

MC: ...

Luke: *gets the plate from them and set it aside*

Luke: *holds both of their hands* But next time, don't end our friendship like that or you'll see me get mad. Hmph! *puffing his cheeks*

MC: ...

MC: *nods*

Luke: *giggles*

Simeon: *enters the room* Luke? Ah, MC. You're here. Good. I need to talk to both of you.

Luke: Huh?

Simeon: Luke, after you get discharged from this hospital, we will go back to Celestial Realm.

Luke and MC: *both look shocked*

Luke: I-Isn't that too sudden? We haven't finished the student exchange program yet—

Simeon: Diavolo said that it had to be postponed.

Luke: Oh...

MC: ...

MC: Does that mean Luke has no reason to stay here?

Simeon: Yes, MC. I'm afraid.

MC: ...

Luke: But we just got— *sad frowns*— How about extending my stay here for a few days?

Simeon: *smiles understandingly* I'll ask.

*Simeon managed to talk it out and Luke was allowed to stay one more week in Devildom*

Luke and MC: *has been spending the remaining time cuddling in their room while MC tells him stories told by their mother when she was still alive*

MC: In the end, the hawk and the rabbit had to depart separately.

Luke: That's quite sad...

MC: ...

MC: But mother said, the hawk continued to protect the rabbit from the distance. Stopping other hawks from hunting the rabbit.

Luke: ...

Luke: Was the hawk being careful though?

MC: *nods*

Luke: Would it continue to eat its meal and be healthy?

MC: *nods*

Luke: That's good! Because I'm sure the rabbit will see them again!

MC: ...

MC: *nods* No matter how much time passes, I'll be still your friend.

Luke: Hm! Maybe in another 1000 years, I'll be an archangel! Then, I'll be a proper big brother to you!

MC: You're already a proper big brother to me.

Luke: No! Big brothers cuddle! Not being cuddled!

MC: ...

MC: *hugs him tighter*

Luke: ...

Luke: *tearing up* Always take care of yourself, okay?

MC: *nods*

Levi: I've heard that Luke already left.

Mammon: Yeah. Simeon came to fetch him.

Levi: ...

Levi: How about MC?

Mammon: They didn't say anything.

Levi: ...

Mammon: What? You're not thinking of going in there so you can comfort them, are you?

Mammon: *mutters* Trying to replace Luke as soon as he left.

Levi: *blushes in embarrassment* I'm not thinking that way! And besides, it's not like I see MC as a friend or a sibling—

Asmo: Ooh~! Did I hear that right?

Levi: A-Asmo! What are you doing here?

Asmo: Too bad, Levi. You're too late.

Levi: Huh? What do you mean?

Asmo: I'm sure it's more likely that MC will end up with Beel. Not you or Satan.

Levi: ...

Mammon: How come?

Asmo: Eh? You didn't know? Before Luke left—

Luke: Beelzebub! Make sure no demons will try to make a move on MC while I'm away!

Beel: ...

Beel: Not even me?

Luke: Wha— What do you mean about that?! Of course that includes you!

Simeon: Luke, I think it isn't right that you restrict MC from having a relationship. *sweat drop*

Luke: I'm not restricting them! It's just that— no one deserves them here in Devildom!

Beel: Um... Me?

MC: ...

MC: I don't remember you being interested in me.

Beel: I am. I'm just not being obvious.

Asmo: And that's how it went.

Levi: ...

Mammon: Yo, bro? Are you okay?

Levi: *fumes* I'm not okay! Tell me where Beel is! How dare he be sneaky?! *runs to find him*

Mammon: ...

Mammon: You just made that up, didn't you?

Asmo: Nope. That's totally true.

Mammon: Er. People are forgetting that MC is still scary and intimidating.

Asmo: Lucifer is scary and intimidating but almost everyone loves him.

Mammon: Good point.

[sneakersnacks]

Come Back Safe to Me

A/N: Hi everyone its August, I kind of crashed and burned after traveling so much and went through a weird slump. Please enjoy part 4 guys

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

You suck in a sharp breath as you jolt up, taking in your surroundings and realizing you were in Ghosts spare bedroom, you've been staying here for a good two months now, almost fully recovered. Sometimes your brain would wander whilst you slept, dreaming of the things you have seen and done. You turn on the side lamp next to you and open the little drawer in the nightstand. Taking out a pill bottle and holding it in your hands, fiddling with the cap. You didn't like taking these but sometimes, the anxiousness was too much for you to deal with on your own.

There was a light tap on your door, you set the pill bottle down being unsuccessful with getting it open, "Yea?" you say and the door opens just a crack.

"Are you alright?" Ghost said through the sliver of door, his face not visible to you. You knew he didn't sleep with his mask on and you guys haven't reached that boundary of you seeing him without it off yet, you didn't mind though.

"I am, I apologize if I woke you up, bad dream ya know?" you heard a hum of agreement come from him. He was about to close the door but you spoke before it was shut, "Can you open this for me? I promise I wont look." you say as you grab the bottle from the side table. He tells you to close your eyes and you do as youre told.

With closed eyes, you hold out the pill bottle toward the doorway. You hear Ghost step inside and approach you cautiously. His presence is comforting, familiar even though you can't see him. You feel a gentle touch as he takes the bottle from your hand.

"Keep your eyes closed," he reminds you softly, his voice carrying a warmth that soothes your nerves. You listen, your breaths slow and deliberate, trying to push away the lingering unease from the nightmare that still lingered in your mind.

The click of the pill bottle being opened resonates in the quiet room. You feel Ghost's fingers deftly undo the cap, the sound reassuring in its simplicity. He places the bottle back in your hand, his touch fleeting yet tender.

"Here you go," Ghost says, and you sense the pill bottle being placed back into your palm. "Take your time."

"Thank you," you murmur gratefully, your trust in him absolute. You wait a moment before opening your eyes, adjusting to the soft glow of the lamp once more. As you look toward the door, Ghost is already slipping out, the door shutting gently behind him.

You take a breath, your fingers tracing the rim of the opened bottle. There's a strange sense of vulnerability mixed with relief in letting someone else assist you in such a personal moment. Ghost's empathy, his quiet understanding, it's something that tugs at your heart in a way you hadn't expected.

You swallow the pill, the familiar bitter taste lingering on your tongue, and you lay back down, allowing the medication to slowly calm your racing thoughts. But as the anxiety begins to ebb away, a different sort of ache lingers—the ache of needing someone to confide in, to share the burdens you carry.

Ghost has been a constant in your life, an enigmatic presence offering support without prying. But there's a distance you can't seem to bridge, an unspoken barrier that both comforts and frustrates you. You wonder what lies behind that mask, what thoughts and emotions hide beneath its surface.

The room remains quiet, save for the soft hum of the lamp. Your thoughts drift, pondering the complexity of emotions swirling within you. There's a growing desire to understand Ghost better, to unravel the mystery that shrouds him. But you also fear disrupting the delicate balance that exists between you two.

-Next Morning-

The smell of coffee filled your nose waking you up from the light sleep that you were able to get. The medicine always made you more groggy in the morning, needing an extra minute or two to put yourself together. You grab your joggers and pull them onto your legs before heading out of the room, going directly into the kitchen and seeing Ghosts back. His compression top fitting him just right, you always wondered what color his hair was, if he had any hair? You get a small smile on your face thinking about Ghost being bald. You walk up to him and prop yourself on the kitchen counter, he is making himself some tea, he pulls another mug out and pours some coffee into it, adding a bit of cream and no sugar, the way you liked it. He was silent in this process, something seemed a bit off.

"Whats wrong?" you ask.

He hands you the mug without meeting your eyes and takes his cup of tea in his hands, his balaclava is rolled up so he could sip on it easily. He grabs his phone out of his pocket with his free hand and scrolls through it for a second before showing me the screen, its a message from Price.

I need you and Crow to come back to base, urgent

It was brief, couldn't afford giving details over text. Ghost spoke now, "I know you are about recovered but I dont like the idea of you going on a mission just yet." You were about to protest before he cut you off, "I have no say in what you do Crow but I swear if you dont come back in one piece I will end you myself."

"I'll be fine, Ghost," You assured him, your voice calm yet determined. "We've been through worse."

He let out a sigh, his demeanor tense as he took a sip of his tea. His balaclava rolled up, revealing only a fraction of his face, but enough to convey the worry etched in his expression.

"You can't control everything," You reminded him gently, knowing well the weight he carried on his shoulders, the need to protect those around him, even if it meant suppressing his own fears.

Ghost's jaw tensed slightly, his gaze fixed on a distant point. "I know," he murmured, the words heavy with unspoken emotions. He took a deep breath, composing himself before meeting my eyes for the first time since the message arrived.

"I'll be right by your side." He says

The gesture touched you, the silent support and willingness to stand by your side despite his reservations. You could feel the depth of his concern, the silent plea in his eyes urging you to be cautious.

"I appreciate that," You replied, offering him a small smile, trying to alleviate some of the worry etched on his features. "But I'll be fine, I promise."

Ghost nodded, a silent agreement passing between us. He understood your need to fulfill the duty we had signed up for, just as he carried his own burdens. There was an unspoken bond forged in these moments, a mutual understanding of the risks we faced and the unyielding determination to see it through together.

As we finished our drinks in the quiet of the kitchen, preparing ourselves mentally for the imminent mission, you couldn't help but feel grateful for Ghost's unwavering support. His silent promise to watch over you resonated deeply, a reassurance that even amidst uncertainty, we would navigate the challenges together.

The urgency of the situation lingered, yet there was an unspoken tension between the both of you as you prepared to head back to the base. Ghost's concern for your safety was evident, his protective instincts on high alert.

As the two of you stood in the kitchen, the weight of the impending mission pressing down, You felt a sudden impulse, a longing to dispel the unease between you, if only for a fleeting moment.

Ghost's gaze was fixed on his phone, contemplating the message from Price, his balaclava still rolled up. Without thinking, you set your mug down and reached out, your fingers lightly grazing his hand, causing him to glance up in surprise.

Your eyes met, a silent understanding passing between the both of you. In that brief moment, You saw a myriad of emotions flicker in his eyes—concern, hesitation, and an underlying vulnerability.

Leaning in slightly, you hesitated for a moment, giving him an opportunity to pull away. But Ghost remained still, his gaze locked with yours, a silent invitation in his eyes.

Closing the gap, you pressed your lips gently against his—a soft, tentative kiss filled with unspoken emotions. It was a fleeting yet meaningful gesture, an attempt to convey the unspoken gratitude, trust, and reassurance that words often failed to express.

For a moment, time seemed to stand still as your lips met, a surge of warmth spreading through you. Ghost responded with a hint of surprise, his lips yielding to the gentle touch before he pulled back slightly, his expression a mix of astonishment and a touch of vulnerability.

"I-I'm sorry," You stammered, feeling a rush of embarrassment flood over me. "I just... I wanted to..."

But before you could finish your sentence, Ghost's hand cupped your cheek gently, his thumb brushing against your skin. He leaned in, his lips meeting yours in a more deliberate kiss this time—a silent affirmation, a reciprocation of the unspoken sentiments that lingered between us.

The kiss was tender, a fragile yet profound connection that spoke volumes. In that moment, the worries about the impending mission, the uncertainties, and the dangers ahead faded into the background, eclipsed by the intimacy of the shared moment.

As you each pulled away, the air between you seemed charged with a newfound closeness. Ghost's eyes held a softness you hadn't seen before, a silent acknowledgment of the depth of our connection.

"Be careful," he whispered, his voice tinged with emotion, a silent plea echoing in his words.

"I will, Ghost" You promised, feeling a surge of warmth and gratitude for the unspoken understanding that had blossomed between you two in that simple yet profound exchange.

"Simon." he said. You raised an eyebrow at him, "When its the two of us, its Simon." he states

"Simon." You say with a small voice, a smile upon your lips, you feel him take a deep breath in.

With a shared glance filled with unspoken promises, we readied ourselves for the mission ahead, the memory of that fleeting yet meaningful kiss lingering like a fragile echo in the air, a silent promise of something more waiting to be explored.

[ask-sibverse]

So! Yesterday was another bad migraine and my brain turns to cotton when those happen. I'm still kiiiiinda recovering so for now, because reading other people talking about their headcanons and thoughts on fandom shit just makes me wanna yell about my own shit! So here we go, going into every single Dreamtale in Sibverse, why they fought, and how they reconcile (short summaries, only going into anything not a spoiler)

Nox and Reve (main pair)

Why they fought: p typical Apple incident, Nox was still just angry at everything and everyone by the time Reve came out of stone. It took a long time before Nox calmed down, and by then was too proud to admit he was wrong. Reve really didn't know how to handle things, so things continued in much of the same for thousands of years

How they reconciled: Mari, who was originally a close friend of Reve, is "accidentally kidnapped" by the Bad Sanses and ends up befriending them as well. Through some more dumbass bullshit the twins are finally in a calmer situation to talk things out (and actually admit to their own stupidity)

Star and Nova (outer/celestialverse)

Why they fought: they only fought during the Apple Incident

How they reconciled: Nova and Star talked things out immediately after Star came out of being a statue

Belladonna and Daisy (floralverse)

Why they fought: the torment of the villagers continued even into teenage years. Daisy, likely as a coping mechanism, was unable to fully admit to how bad the villagers were, leading Bella to believe his twin just couldn't admit that "good people" could be bad. This led to an almost compulsive "need" to "prove" to Daisy that everyone has darkness and can be bad.

How they reconciled: tbh Bella and Daisy never truly "talked things out." It's more that over time while Bella was sealed he started to calm down and they were less at each other's throats (this is sibverse only. The floralverse fic is a "what if" Star never came and Bella was never sealed)

Kage and Yume (I still need to fucking name this verse)

Why they fought: similar to Bella and Daisy, but Kage honestly wanted everyone to hurt like he was hurting, including his twin. Kage honestly did some fucked up shit that will require trigger warnings when appropriate.

How they reconciled: they really don't. Their bond is never able to recover, even with Kage eventually apologizing

Morpheus and Pyrite (witchverse, we're getting into verses I haven't introduced yet)

Why they fought: post apple incident Morph calmed down relatively fast, all things considered. He was unable to free his twin at the time, and ended up meeting and becoming close to a mortal that became like a mother/family to him. When she was murdered, he fucking lost it, and decided to just wreck everything in his grief

How they reconciled: Morph started handling his grief better and calmed the fuck down (there is a lot more to this)

Comfy and Anxy (Comfort and Anxiety, they don't quite have a name for the verse oops)

Why they fought: Acrylic(Ink) ended up repeatedly alienating Comfy from his twin, meanwhile Anxy had some of his own issues that made everything worse.

How they reconciled: they actually got a chance to talk properly with help from some outside forces.

Important note: Acrylic is not an "evil" Ink. He had some shit ways of handling some trauma and mental issues, but is not evil.

Solar and Lunar (mythverse, a semi FTFO inspired verse with influences from Norse and other pagan mythology)

Why they fought: being stubborn

How they reconciled: they ended up raising Cura (their Ink) together

Nighty and Shard

Why they fought: apple incident

How they reconciled: Nighty grew up and calmed down, and talked things out with Shard post statue, then raised his twin

Dagger and Knuckles (Fellverse)

Why they fought: honestly it was the two dumbasses just petty bickering - because they're Swapfell based not Swap based - post Apple Incident

How they reconciled: work between Lighter (their Ink, an absolutely sassy gremlin in platform heels) and Star to basically literally knock some sense into both of them

Swad and Swan (Swapdream babyyyy)

Why they fought: excessive amounts of positive magic in Swad's system led to the blinding positivity and manic behavior

How they reconciled: Star basically fought Swad enough to burn the magic out of the system enough for him to finally calm down and the two had a very long talk

Other Dreamtale twins that did not need to reconcile are Silver and Gold (merverse/leviathan verse, if they ever fought and reconciled it was waaaaay outside the fic timeline), and Summer and Winter (rescued basically moments before the Apple Incident, their tree of feelings is under a magic barrier now and neither twin consumed an apple), and then Yami and Hikari (coreverse, the multiverse Observer was born in) reconcile due to heavy amounts of plot intervention

[animeangelicprincess]

Update

Hey guys. I know I keep disappearing on you guys and I do apologize for that sincerely. My old charger stopped working properly all of a sudden and I had to get a new one. There is my iPhone, but in some cases,Tumblr tends to be more beneficial on my laptop in my opinion.

I also have posted the 1-year anniversary event for the @danganronpa-v3-demo-au blog, but it's... not fully ready. This is mainly due to the post being rushed and me wanting to get it out in September (the month of the anniversary). You can still interact with the page if you want. There just won't be any sprites unfortunately.

I'm also currently recovering from COVID, which sucks because I caught it on a Sunday night, just a week before Christmas. I didn't even realize I had it until like... after I got tested twice(one on Dec 19 and the other on Dec 22)! I'm feeling a lot better now at least.

As for when I'm going to be RPing again, the only answer I can give is that I will try my best be as active as possible. I can't make any promises as, like I said before, I have a job now. The day I first started on my very first RP blog was when I was unemployed and looking for work, which is why I had so much free time. I still get free time. Just not as much as I used to.

If you ever notice that I'm active but haven't responded to your interaction yet, please keep in mind that I have a LOT of interactions to catch up on. As a matter of fact, I fear that a lot of my old notifications regarding interactions have been deleted by tumblr due to me not responding to them after such a long time. If there's an RP I haven't gotten back to you on since September 6th or earler, I would suggest either finding the last thread and tagging me or starting a brand new interaction. I enjoy RPing with all of you and would love to continue to do so.

Otherwise, please be patience with me. If you feel the need to check on me, that's fine, but please make sure not to do it multiple times a day. A week prior is good enough.

Happy Holidays!

-Mod Princess

@unofficialuser @lamarlemieux

@mod-puffys-hell @miss-amethyst-needs-a-life @werewolf-makoto-naegi @laylayeh @get-outside-nekomatsu @aster-nightingale @vivuz (Apologies to anyone I didn't tag as I'm not good a remembering mod usernames ^^;)

[firstaidspray]

WIP Wednesday!!!!!

Tagged by @corvosattano to share some shit for WIP Wednesday. Thank you!! Here's some stuff from Navy and Tim's first meeting in the Dark Place.

Alan had given her his last pack of batteries. “Make them last,” he'd told her. So Navy does, keeping her flashlight off while slinking through the alleys of the Dark Place, searching every little corner for supplies. She's running low, and her apartment hasn't appeared for what seems like a few days. Her hunting rifle only has the ammo loaded into it, none else to spare, and her handgun is empty. One half-empty bottle of painkillers jostles around in her bag, but otherwise, no first aid, either.

The shadows that skulk around the Dark Place seem to all be the disappearing kind today, grumbling Alan's name as they shamble by, fizzing out and evaporating when Navy approaches them. Why they still utter his name in her presence is unknown, but she's too tired to question it. 

And though they are the disappearing kind for now, Navy holds her rifle close, finger kept as trigger discipline dictates but ready to change in an instant should a shadow need dispatching. She also carries her flashlight, though it's off to conserve battery life, and will blast a beam of brightness into a shadow's face should one attack her. As of now, that hasn't happened, but the Dark Place is unpredictable.

Stepping down the alleyway that passes by the OD Diner, Navy hums to herself, until she hears the clattering of objects inside the diner. She holds her rifle and flashlight at the ready, though doesn't yet turn it on, and slowly nudges the door open and enters. As expected, objects are knocked down, but there isn't an entity in sight. 

Until there is.

He appears from nowhere, only able to utter a friendly “hey” before Navy uses the end of her flashlight to smack him directly in the head. He stumbles back and begins making sounds of pain, and when Navy flashes her light at him, he is not a shadow. He doesn't burn away like the dark substance they are made of. 

It's a normal guy.

“Oh shit,” she calls, slinging her rifle over her back and rushing over to the man. He's sitting on the floor, leaned against the counter, rubbing the spot she'd just smacked him in– that flashlight had left quite a mark on his forehead. 

“I'm so sorry,” Navy apologizes, kneeling next to him and rifling through her bag, “I didn't know you were normal. I thought you were another shadow. I'm so sorry.”

He gives a weak thumbs up and a smile to match. “It's okay. I understand. It's good to see another human around here.”

In her bag, Navy manages to find a trauma pad inside a zipper she hadn't yet checked, and pulls out the last of her painkillers. She begins to hastily apply the pad to the injury on the man's head, and offers him two pills. 

“Here, take these. They'll help.” She urges him to take the pills, and he does, swallowing them dry and making a face at the texture. “I really am sorry for that. What's your name?”

He manages to stand up, balancing on the counter. “Tim Breaker. I'm– err, was, I guess– the sheriff of Bright Falls. I was brought here by a man named Warlin Door.”

Navy makes a confused facial expression. “Mr Door? How did he…never mind. I'm Navy Young. Look, you and I need to find someplace safe to recover. Preferably my apartment, if I can get it to show up…”

“It's really okay, Navy,” he reassures her, fully standing up. “I'm fine. I mean, I'm not saying no to a safe spot, but…it's gonna be pretty hard to find one around here. I haven't been able to find one since that first one that Door popped me into, and even it disappeared. This place shifts, like a dream. Still kind of convinced it is one.”

She shakes her head. “Trust me, it's not. It's…another realm of reality. It does shift, you're right about that, but the Dark Place isn't something you can just wake up from. I've been here for years, God knows how many. Navigating it is next to impossible. The goal when I'm outside of my apartment is to simply survive.”

“But you have an apartment here?” Tim asks. “Weird. Does it shift like the rest of the world?”

“No. It's the one consistent place in the whole realm. I mean, where the entrance shows up is pretty random, but the inside is like a safe zone. The Dark Presence put me there to write a song that'll get me out of here, but honestly, I've played until my fingers bled and no luck. I doubt I'll ever leave. So lately I've just been trying to chart the area my apartment tends to show up at, this central area outside. C'mon, I'll show you.”

Tim follows Navy out the door, following her suit and clutching his handgun, and the two step onto Caldera Street. Lights flicker above them, and the wet sidewalk reflects the neon of the signs on the buildings surrounding. Shadows lurk on the street in the distance, but luckily don't come near them…yet.

[rays-of-fire-and-ice]

Have you got any new fanfictions in the works? I don't mean to sound demanding or anything, just wondering is all, I like reading your stories 😁

No problem anon, I'm glad you like reading them.

Life's been busy lately, but I definitely have a few I'm working on. Most are unfinished ones from Two Weeks of Hitsuhina 2021, and one is a request from months ago (was working on it until I jumped on here).

Also while I'm here, I haven't forgotten to make a post regarding what the next Hitsuhina event will be, I'm hoping to have that post out sometime in the next two weeks.

Here's a few fic previews, please feel free to provide any feedback or comments:

Our Home (request)

“How do you feel about a mushroom and leek broth tonight?” she asks without stopping.

Toshiro is behind her, tending the fruits part of the garden. “What with?”

“Soba noodles and…maybe fish?”

He shrugs. “I can go get the fish after we’re done here.”

She remembers a time when she first started this garden when he’d use any excuse to not garden. To be fair, she’d started when the heat was rising, and just as the sky was blue, Toshiro did not cope well with the heat. However, the day she brought home watermelon seeds, it seemed he’d made his mission to grow his favorite fruit. Sometimes she’d catch him in the early hours of the morning out in the garden, tending to the watermelon plant. He’d brush it off, saying he thought he’d heard an animal and worried all of her hard work would come undone if they’d got into the garden. She’d yet to see any animals come close to the home, but they’d put up a fence just to be safe.

“You don’t have to,” I was planning to go to the Junrinan anyway to...” She trails off when Toshiro makes a startled sound.

“What is it?” she asks.

“Come see for yourself.”

Before the Dawn of War

Only a few lights are on outside, but the crescent moon is bright enough to illuminate her path. Momo doesn’t have a particular destination in mind, just letting herself wonder around where she feels like. In the past, she’d only caught a glimpse of Seireitei at this time of the night – once when she’d come back from a mission in the World of Living, another time when she had to help Rangiku get back to her quarters after drinking too much – but each time she’d noticed the stillness and almost silence all around her. It’s normally quiet, save for the few Shinigami who are still out for one reason or another.

Tonight though, save for her footsteps, it’s completely silent. There’s no wind to rattle the lanterns or flag signs along the walls, and no Shinigami wondering around. Despite sensing all the reiatsu around her and her zanpakuto at her side, Momo feels alone.

It’s not helped when she comes upon wreckage that had yet to be cleared. Two walls were half destroyed, and the surrounding buildings were in only slightly better condition. With a shuddering breath, she’s quick to turn on her heel and go down another path. How was any of this fair? They’d just come out of a war and were thrust into another one with no time to fully recover.

She halts when a pulse of reiatsu comes from one of the joint training grounds. She frowns and looks in its direction. Hitsugaya-kun?

At the Root of it All

The dragon lowers his head, coming to closer to the captain. Then let me rephrase. Why do you care about her?

“You know the answer to that already.”

There are some parts of you I cannot fully comprehend, Master. I need to hear you say it.

Toshiro lowers his head. Memories of happier times with Momo come to mind, but they don’t give him the usual burst of nostalgia. His heart aches, a small part of him wishing he could go back to those times and be completely oblivious to what his future held. He also wonders if he had teased or shrugged her off too much. Did any of his remarks hurt her and he never realized? Should he have done more to apologize to her when he upset her?

“She was the strangest person I knew back then,” he remarks. “She was never afraid of me. The qualities about me that made people scared of me…she saw them differently. She called me a ‘friend’, she wanted to do things together. She even thought we’d both go to the Academy. Even so, before I knew your name, I had no intention of becoming a Shinigami. I watched her go to Academy, thinking she’d never come back and that I’d never go to her.”

Berry Much (inspired by @tinaillustrations art)

He’d thought it was an odd suggestion from the start.

“You want to go to…a strawberry farm?”

Momo nodded enthusiastically. “It’s spring in that part of the World of the Living, so it won’t be too hot for you.”

Toshiro looked down at the pamphlet again. Come and pick your own strawberries, fresh from the plant!! And don’t forget to stop by our shop for our famous strawberry foods and merchandise! He and Momo had managed align their schedules to get a short break together. Momo hadn’t been to the World of the Living for years, so Toshiro told her to pick somewhere and they’d go for a daytrip. This is not what he’d expect her to pick. “Why this?”

“I thought it would be a nice change of pace. Plus, I’ve been craving strawberries lately.”

And so here they were, crouching in the dirt with a cloudless, blue sky above them, and rows of strawberries as far as the eye could see.

[starlit-serenade]

Kiss and Make Up

🧡 Summary: Months after a heart-breaking break-up, your best friend Hyunjin begs you to attend a late night party at his home, where you see the last person you'd wanted to see--your ex-boyfriend, Bang Chan. (Requested)

🧡 Word Count: 2,421

🧡 Pairing: Christopher Bang/Bang Chan X Reader / Characters: GenderNeutral!Reader; Producer!Bang Chan; Hwang Hyunjin (Hyunjin);

🧡 Rated: T for swearing / Warnings: swearing / Genre: GenderNeutral!Reader; Angst; Fluff (?);

You stare at yourself in the mirror, wondering if you look good enough or if you need to change any part of your appearance. You want to look attractive enough for the party, but not attractive enough that you'll attract any unwanted attention from men.

Not that you don't like men. You just don't want a boyfriend anytime soon. You just got out of a relationship about a month or so ago and you haven't fully recovered yet.

You sigh and redo your hair. Still, you just aren't satisfied with your appearance, but you promised your friend Hyunjin that you'd be there at 10, and it's already 9:30.

You arrive at Hyunjin's home only a few minutes after you'd planned to. The place is filled with dancing people that you recognize, but most that you don't know. It's Hyunjin's party and the only people here are friends of his, friends of friends, and friends of friends of friends. You don't see him anywhere as you enter the house, but you expect him to be in the kitchen near the drinks, so that's where you start.

You see Hyunjin leaning against the counter with a red cup in his hand, and push through the crowd of people dancing to music to walk toward him. His long, blonde hair is tied back in a messy little ponytail, and he's dressed 

"Oh, look who's finally here," he says. He passes you a cup, which you sip from slowly. "Don't drink too much. We both know your alcohol tolerance is shit."

"It's not that bad."

"Well, there was that one time where you got absolutely shitfaced and threw up, and Channie had to take you back to our dorm."

You glare at Hyunjin at the mention of your ex boyfriend, and he ducks his head apologetically.

"Sorry. I won't say his name."

"You had better not. Why did you want me to come here, anyway?"

"Because I didn't want you cooped up in your room forever, idiot. You need to get out."

There's a long moment of silence between you two, filled by the sound of loud music and people dancing and singing along or talking. You hadn't been to one of these parties in a long time, mostly because you were afraid you were going to run into Bang Chan, a frequent party-goer. But Hyunjin had texted you last night, saying he wanted you here.

You start tapping your foot to the music as you look over the people dancing in the living room. You think, for a moment, that you see a familiar form drift through the crowd and tense up.

 "What?" Hyunjin asks, frowning at you from the side.

"I thought I saw . . ."

Chan emerges from the crowd again, wearing a black cap, and leather jacket over a black T-shirt and black jeans. He looks around before his eyes fall on you.

"Fuck," you mutter,  lowering your head, hoping that he didn't recognize you. You turn your head and stare, wide-eyed, at Hyunjin, who has his hands up in surrender. "Did you know he was coming? Is that why you asked me here?"

"Who?" he asks.

You glare at him accusingly. "Bang Chan," you hiss.

"Well Y/N, I just . . . he asked me to let you know if you were going to be here, because he wanted to fix things with you and--"

"Fuck off," you mutter.

"Y/N, he wants to fix things. He loves you."

"Whatever." You turn around and march past Hyunjin and pour yourself some more alcohol. Fuck it.

You broke up with Bang Chan a few months ago. Not because any of you did anything to each other, specifically. Neither of you hurt each other physically or insulted each other. After just over a year of dating, you knew you had loved him. But that didn't mean the relationship was perfect.

Bang Chan loved you too. You knew that. But he was often too busy to show it. He was also a hard worker, dedicated to his job. That meant that he was rarely home, and when he was, he was always working or too tired to give you enough attention. You had once tried to tell him that you needed more attention, but he waved you off. You eventually realized that you couldn't live like this, feeling alone, and broke it off with him. You loved him, but you couldn't stay in the relationship if you were going to feel isolated. It broke your heart.

You've spent the past few months recovering from the pain of missing him, intentionally avoiding any place you might see Bang Chan. It didn't help that your friend Hyunjin was friends with Bang Chan.

You take another sip of the drink in your hand. You've been trying so hard to get over Bang Chan, and you know that seeing him will undo all of that work. Might as well drink some more so you can survive the rest of the night after seeing him.

Halfway through your third cup, someone taps your shoulder. You turn, and unsurprisingly, it's Bamg Chan. He looks really good. He's removed his baseball hat, so you can see that he dyed his hair back to black sometime since you broke up with him.

"Hey Y/N," he says, looking you up and down. "Can we talk?"

Fuck.

You're halfway through your third cup of whatever-it-was, but you're still not drunk enough for this. You're drunk enough to make stupid decisions, but you're not drunk enough to be unaware of them. Every stupid thing you may or may not do, you'll remember clearly.

"Sure," you say, facing him and leaning your weight against the edge of the table. "What do you want?" you ask somewhat drunkenly.

God, that sounded lame.

"I just wanted to apologize," he says. "I was thinking back to our last conversation."

You can feel your head is dizzy, but you shake your head and ignore it. Chan seems too focused on his speaking to notice.

"I realize that I was being a real dick. I wasn't listening to you back then. I wasn't giving you enough attention.  I was too absorbed in my work, and I didn't see it then. I was too obsessed with my--"

You don't know what comes over you. You just want him to shut up and stop talking. You grab the car of his stupid leather jacket and kiss him. It certainly shuts him up.

He's frozen for a moment, before he places his hands on your waist and starts kissing you back. You hum and your fingers wind into his hair, pulling him closer. He tastes so familiar.

His fingers squeeze your hip gently. That brings you back to reality.

Why am I kissing him? We broke up.

You pull away from him, letting go of his jacket, your hand covering your mouth in shock. Your head hurts. You don't know if it was drunk you or normal you who kissed Chan. You're sober enough to know that that was stupid, though. Chan doesn't know that, though. He could think you're just drunk out of your mind, right?

You push past him and can hear him calling your name. Calling for you to come back. You need to get out of here.

You wake up the morning after, feeling like absolute shit. Your hair is a mess. You're tired, from seeing Bang Chan at last night's party. But it's the weekend and you have no plans.

Your phone has several messages from Hyunjin, asking if you're okay and got home safe, but you're too emotionally exhausted to respond.

After sitting in bed, thinking about how you kissed your ex boyfriend Bang Chan, you decide to take a refreshing shower.

After you finish your shower, you wipe yourself off in your towel. As you stand in the mirror, your towel wrapped around your body, your phone rings and, to your horror, it's Bang Chan. You'd deleted your number from his phone during your last argument, and his from yours. He doesn't have your number memorized, you know that. So how can he have called you?

You pick up.

"How did you get my number, Christopher?" you say before he can speak. You rarely call him Christopher. Usually, it's Chris or Chan or Channie. It's only Christopher when you're mad, and you've been mad at him for months.

He pauses. "A friend we both have."

You groan. "I'm going to kill Hyunjin."

"Y/N, I have a request," Chan says on the other end of the phone. You groan.

"I can't guarantee I'll say yes, but just say it."

He takes a deep breath. "Can we meet for breakfast? I want to just talk."

You know you should decline for your own sanity. But deep down, you miss Chan. You miss his kisses, his hugs. You miss him.

"Alright," you say, your voice coming out much softer than you intended.

"Can we meet at our breakfast place? I mean--it's not our breakfast place anymore. But can we meet there?"

You tense. "Okay."

"Thank you."

You hang up and finish up getting ready for the day. Halfway through dressing yourself, you realize you're wearing one of your nicest shirts, as if you're dressing up for a nice party. You tell yourself you're not dressing up for Chan, but deep down you know you are.

You head to the coffee shop you and Chan used to go to for regular dates. It was a great place to focus on work and school. As you walk in, you see Chan sitting at your usual table. He waves you over and you sit across from him anxiously. The table already has your usual breakfast and drink. He remembered it. Your heart melts. You'd thought he didn't care enough to remember, but apparently he did remember. 

"Hey . . ." he says, smiling nervously, fidgeting with his fingers on the table.

"Hi." You look up at him. He's smiling sadly at you, like you're something he wants so dearly, but just out of reach. Perhaps that's how you felt before. You had wanted to be his, but you never felt like you were when he would only focus on his work instead of you. Realizing there was no point in trying to get his attention, despite him already being your boyfriend, you gave up.

"So . . . last night at the party."

You freeze up. "I was drunk."

"I know," he says. "But you know what they say. Drunk words and actions are sober thoughts."

You glare at him. "Did you call me to breakfast just to rub it in my face that I miss you and kissed you? Why did you call me here, Christopher?"

"You miss me?" he asks, eyebrow raised cockily, as if he couldn't tell from how you two made out last night.

"Christopher!"

"Sorry," he says, ducking his head. "So how have you been?"

"I've been alright," you say. His question feels forced, like an awkward transition, but you answer anyway. "How has producing been going for you?"

Chan winces. "It's been going alright. After we . . . after you left, I didn't sleep for a few days. I didn't want to go home because I didn't want to come home to an empty apartment. Then when I finally went home, it finally hit me that you were gone. I couldn't produce anything for weeks. Changbin and Jisung were worried."

You nod. "I'm sorry that I took you away from your work by just not being there."

"No," he says, shaking your head. "It was good. It gave me time to think. About us. About my role in the break up."

"I'm glad."

"Y/N," Chan says suddenly. You look up at him, and he's staring at you. "I was saying it last night--before you kissed me--but I understand, now, what I couldn't all those months ago. I wasn't giving you enough attention.  I was too obsessed with my work to see that I was neglecting you. I loved you, I love you, and I didn't show that enough. I'm so, so sorry. I want to ask you if I can have one more chance. I don't deserve it, but please. If you give me this chance, I promise I'll be better. I've toned it down with my work. I will listen to you."

You stare at him.

Honestly, you miss him. You think back to your relationship with Chan. You loved him. You still love him. You never stopped. But near the end of your relationship, you felt so alone. It felt one sided. You were in a relationship with Bang Chan, and Bang Chan was in a relationship with his work.

But looking at him now, you know he's grown, and you're sure he's changed. It's not like he meant to hurt you. He was just being stupid and unaware. Now he's very aware of his mistakes, and has changed a lot.

You look down at the food and drink that Chan ordered for you. He remembered your tastes, what you like, your favorites. You'd thought he wouldn't remember things like that. But he did. Perhaps . . . 

"Okay," you say softly. Chan looks up at you, eyes wide in surprise.

"Really?"

You smile and nod. "Yes. One more chance."

His smile is bright and wide, and he grabs your hand from across the table. You feel warm inside. "Thank you, Y/N. I promise I won't disappoint you."

You feel yourself smiling. Bang Chan's smile is something you've missed seeing, and now that he's smiling at you again, months after your breakup, you feel so happy.

"I know." You squeeze his hands gently.

"So . . ." Chan looks around anxiously. "Do you have any plans after this?"

You shake your head, smiling.

"Do you want to spend the rest of the day with me?"

You nod. "I'd like that."

[riseandshinelittleblossom]

The Hedge Maze

I have been debating over whether or not to post this, or hell even finish it, for the last couple of weeks, so before I talk myself out of it again...here it is. I apologize.

Warning: LEMONS...its just lemons.

Disclaimer: I do not own Maxwell Beaumont (PB does), he owns me.

Tagging some thirsties: @fullbeaumonty @speedyoperarascalparty @leelee10898 @emichelle @ao719

words: 1731

      Finley surveyed the bar from across the crowded ballroom. One or two nobles that she probably should, but did not recognize. The bartender polished glasses in a dreadful attempt to appear busy. With an audible sigh she made her way over. 

      "And for you, madam?" The bartender's heavy voice as he peered at her with intense green eyes.

     "Surprise me."

     Finley spun on her heels and leaned her elbows on the bar, observing the room. 

      In the far corner she could see a dark haired man in a blue sports coat. He seemed as out of place as he was uncomfortable, like one of those dogs that people put Halloween costumes on and then actually took them trick or treating.

       I feel you, buddy.

   Immediately to her right, but closer to the center of the room stood King Liam, his wife Riley on his arm as they chatted away with an older blonde woman. She held a champagne glass in each hand and she gestured widely as she spoke. Finley could tell that the king and queen were less than enthused about the conversation, however she noted that they still gave the impression of being enthralled by the woman's tale.

        The Lady Hana Lee was to their left, a stiff man in a tweed jacket beside her. Finley recognized Hana since her uncle and Hana's father were business associates. She made a mental note to make sure she said hello, lest her Uncle Brandon kill her slowly. 

     "Here you are, miss." 

     Finley turned to see the barkeep sliding a mojito across the bar towards her.

     "Thank you kindly." Finley tipped her head to the man as she collected the drink, swirling it once before taking a sip.

    She hated these sorts of events, but as her uncle had never taken a wife, she was often forced to accompany him.  

     Finley had been raised to fit into courtly life, but as her father was only the brother of an Earl it was never expected that she would live a courtly life, and that was fine by her. 

     From the corner of her eye she saw a man- about her age- wearing a simple black suit coat with a white shirt. She noticed right away that said shirt was unbuttoned far too low to be acceptable, but she ignored him otherwise and continued her ametur surveillance. 

      Still only viewing the man from her peripheral vision she watched as he smoothed his jacket and ran his hands over his chocolate hair before snapping his wrists and sliding up next to her.

     "Good evening, ma'am." he said.

    Without turning her gaze toward him she simply replied, "No."

    He fumbled over himself searching for what to say next.

    "You didn't even look at me. You could at least look a man in his eye when you reject him."

    A smirk formed across Finley's face as she cocked her head to the side ever so slightly.

    She had to admit she was a little intrigued by his persistence and even with only a sideways glance he was quite handsome. Maybe he could be just a bit of fun for the evening, if he played his cards right.

     Shuffling her stance so that she faced him, she peered into his azure eyes.

   "No thank you, m'lord." 

     She offered him a curtsey.

   "That was better, but I feel like that response just lacked the conviction necessary to convince me that you're not interested."

    Finley quirked an eyebrow at him, taking a long pull from her mojito. 

    "I'll take that look as a second chance," he grinned. "I'm Maxwell Beaumont."

    "I'm still unimpressed."

    The brunette man scoffed. "I am a Guardian of the Realm. Won't that at least get me a dance?" 

    Finley giggled, much to her surprise.

    "Fine. But only because you made me laugh."

     They found a spot near the edge of the dance floor, Maxwell immediately pulling her a little closer than the dance actually called for.

      "So, I've told you my name," he smiled down at her before dropping his lips to the shell of her ear. "What's yours?"

    An involuntary shudder shot through Finley's body as his words filled her ear. Her body felt like putty. 

      How did he do that?

      "I- uh- I'm...my name is..it's Finley. Finley Sawyer." she stammered.

     "What a pleasure, Finley Sawyer."

     Several mojitos and a few dances later, Finley found herself gleefully running through the palace's infamous hedge maze, with Maxwell in hot pursuit. Twisting and turning through the foliage, her strawberry blonde hair flying behind her she had never felt freer, and she couldn't remember the last time she'd smiled so much.

      They came to a clearing lined with old timey lanterns, a large round fountain laced with fairy lights in the center.

      "I...I can't...I can't...Maxwell I can't breathe!" She panted, falling immediately into a shrill burst of laughter as he accosted her, fingers wildly tickling her sides as she squirmed.

     They finally fell together on the edge of the fountain, still giggling and doubling over as they tried to catch their breath.

    "I haven't….whoo..I haven't laughed like that in….maybe ever." Finley told him, absentmindedly resting her hand on his thigh.

     Maxwell took a gulp of air and held it, calming his fit before covering her hand in his.

    "Thank you." She said, their eyes finally meeting. 

    "Finley, I," he began, but he paused to wet his lips. "I'm going to kiss you."

    "I would be disappointed if you didn't."

     His long slender fingers brushed her cheek as he tenderly cupped her face. Finley peeked up at him with darkened eyes, leaning closer and closer until at last his soft lips found hers. A bolt of electricity shot directly to her core as Maxwell deepened the kiss, slowly at first but rapidly becoming frantic. Finley splayed her hands against the surprisingly firm muscles of his chest, smoothing her palms under his jacket and over his shoulders.

   Maxwell shrugged the garment off, quickly returning his hands to either side of her face as Finley's fingers deftly worked at his dress shirt buttons.

     "Fin, I want you to know that...I mean I obviously hoped, but...we don't have to do this." Maxwell told her, breaking the kiss.

     A coy grin spread itself across the redhead's lips. "I already know you're a gentleman, no need to go and prove it."

    She slowly stood up, still facing him and she reached behind her to unzip her simple yet elegant black dress.

    Without any straps, it quickly pooled at her feet, her round perky breasts now fully exposed. 

     Maxwell's eyes roamed over the curves of her, his tongue involuntarily running along his bottom lip as he drank in the sight.

     Silently she stepped out of the fabric, throwing one leg over his lap and settling herself upon him. She chastely pressed her lips to his, slowly making her way up his jaw line until she stopped long enough to nibble at his earlobe.

    "Fuck," 

      It fell from his lips in a whisper, his hips bucking slightly as he shuddered.

    "You're a bit overdressed, Mr. Beaumont." She murmured before slowly tracing the shell of his ear with her tongue.

     Maxwell made short work of his dress shirt before fumbling with his belt. Finley dropped her hands between them to assist with the zipper before reaching past the fabric and gripping his hard length. She gently tugged it free of it's confines with a mischievous grin.

    "Big boy. I'll admit I wasn't expecting that." 

     Maxwell's cheeks burned with a twinge of embarrassment but he recovered quickly, his hands gripping her hips, lifting her as he wiggled his hips into position. 

     Finley took her time easing herself down onto him. She gently gyrated her hips in small circles down his length, hands digging into the tanned skin of his shoulders to keep balanced. 

     "Goddamnit, Finley. You're so fucking tight." He moaned, his head falling back. 

     She ran her tongue up his windpipe, nipping and suckling it. 

     When she had finally sheathed him fully inside of her, he gripped the gloves of her ass in two fistfuls and slowly stood up with her. Finley wrapped her legs around his waist instinctively, digging her heels into him. 

     "Do you trust me?" He asked.

     "I suppose I trust you enough."

      Maxwell briefly reached behind him and touched her ankles.

     "Don't let go." He instructed before grabbing her ass once more with white knuckles.

     He slammed his hips into hers, his knees bending slightly as he fucked up into her. 

     "Max... Maxwell, oooooh." She groaned.

     He quickened his pace, rocking gently on the balls of his feet, Finley bouncing wildly into him as she clung to his neck for dear life. 

   She could feel her thighs tighten around his trunk as the familiar warmth gathered in her core. She palmed his cheek, crashing her lips against his and swallowing whole the moans that escaped him. Her other hand slid between their bodies, expertly finding her clit to help herself along. 

      Maxwell's legs began to sputter, the sight of her strumming herself more than he could take and he slowed momentarily as he found his release. 

     Not to be deterred, he buried his face into the crook of her neck, still slamming her hips into his until a moment later Finley joined him, the rush of her arousal coating his cock and abdomen.

      Carefully he stepped back until his calves felt the smooth stone of the fountain and he sat back down. 

     She kissed his forehead, breathing still heavy as she stood from his lap to collect her dress.

   Maxwell licked his lips, enjoying the sight of her dressing in the lantern light. 

    "And to think, a couple of hours ago you wouldn't even let me ask you for a dance."

    He smirked at her, tucking himself away and zipping his pants.

    "Everybody makes mistakes." She answered matter-of-factly. "Will you zip me?"

    Maxwell stood up and grasped her zipper, working it easily up her back. He traced the backs of his fingers up her spine before softly kissing her shoulder.

    "So what do you think, Finley? Can I call you sometime?" 

     She flung her hair over her shoulder, smacking Maxwell in the face with it as she spun to face him.

     "No."

     Finley gathered up her skirt and made her way into the maze.

[nobodyfamousposts]

I haven't read or watched Twilight but I'm very invested in the recent salt posts so please tell me about this Seth's flaws

In my opinion, it’s not worth reading or watching. But I am biased against it because I am a cynical person who hates the series with the white hot intensity of a thousand suns.

But a brief explanation is that Seth is a side character of limited importance to the series. What little importance he has is to emphasize how “cool” the other characters are supposed to be. He is one of the werewolves introduced in the second book (New Moon) and the younger brother of the only female werewolf, Leah (whom is unfairly treated like crap for the crime of being the sole girl to be able to transform into a wolf).

Seth is a fanboy. Plain and simple. He is younger than the other members of the pack and blindly looks up to and supports Jacob (the so-called “true alpha” because bloodline says so), to the point of being fully willing to abandon his home, his family, his pack, and his duty to chase after Jacob when Jacob chooses to abandon everything in order to protect Bella, the main character and single most important person in the series despite the fact that she does nothing useful while also being directly responsible for nearly every bad thing to happen in the series.

Seth’s idolization of Jacob and the other guys is his defining character trait in that he will do anything to be recognized by them (particularly Jacob) and won’t argue with them. Even when they’re being jerks in general or actively contemplating the death of his sister specifically for being annoying and in their words, a “bitter harpy” (because she’s justifiably angry about her ex fiancé leaving her for her cousin and then being forced to transform into a wolf and follow said ex’s orders).

Seth’s importance to the series comes in two ways. Once during the mostly undescribed “Newborn war” when he is praised for killing a vampire on his own off screen (which is like…one of the entire army, so okay but not really THAT great), which seems to be used less as a matter of his character and ability and more to serve as a direct contrast to the results of his sister’s attempts to do the same. Leah, being a female who isn’t Bella, is noted to fail when trying to take on a vampire on her own off screen only for Jacob to somehow have to “save” her from it and get injured in the process, making everyone feel bad for Jacob and blame Leah for trying to handle something on her own or in any way “prove herself”. (It should be noted that the rest of the pack has never actually tried to make her welcome in the group and even indicated they kind of want her dead, btw, which doesn’t exactly make for a team you can trust to have your back in a battle but surely would have NOTHING to do with her choice to try and handle things on her own……really.) This serves the purpose of having Jacob be injured in order for Bella to have an emotional visit with him while he’s recovering without her being the one “technically responsible” for his injury so she can feel guilty without actually appearing guilty (even though the entire war only happened because of her in the first place).

The other and more notable point of Seth’s importance in the series is when Jacob yet again abandons everyone he’s supposed to care about because the wolves are planning to attack the vampires because the vampires are going to break the treaty with the wolves and turn Bella into one of them (at HER insistence, despite knowing full well there is a treaty and that the vampires turning her would be breaking that treaty). Jacob actively abandons his people to try and protect the people he still very much hates just because Bella will be at risk.

Seth is notable for being the first to leave the wolf pack to join Jacob during this time. Because he’s Jacob’s fanboy. And he gives no real thought or concern to the fact that he is similarly abandoning his home, his family, his friends, and everyone he’s ever known to follow Jacob in trying to defend what are essentially strangers who are directly responsible for the current conflict.

Bear in mind that Jacob’s initial abandoning of his people to protect the female protagonist who has made it clear by this point she isn’t interested in him is shown to be the “right thing to do”, and that similarly, Seth’s trailing after him like a puppy is also the “right thing to do”.

Seth’s leaving after Jacob results in Leah leaving the pack to join them because Seth is her younger brother and she wants to protect him. Jacob wanted to be a lone wolf in the first place and tries to use Leah as an excuse to not have Seth join him. Seth then proceeds to turn on Leah at this point and tell her “You ruin everything!” in a line that comes off as so wholly ignorant, insensitive, and pretentious that I almost mistook him for one of the main characters.

This is bearing in mind that Seth is Leah’s younger brother. He KNOWS what she has been through. He also knows damn well that what has happened to Leah was not her fault (losing her now ex fiancé, her father’s death, turning into a wolf). And whether he meant to or not, he essentially blamed her for everything that has happened to her.

Seth actually appears to be acting from this incredibly childish frame of mind that turning into a wolf and being forced to fight and kill to protect people is a super cool thing that only the “elite” get to do instead of a DUTY. He’s stoked that he’s finally allowed into the “special kids club” except that he’s stuck sharing it with his sister who doesn’t want to be there and whose only priority is keeping him alive. And with this being his mind set, he proceeds to whine and blame her for keeping him from getting to go off and do the cool and incredibly dangerous thing he wants to do just because Jacob is doing it.

AND AT NO POINT DOES HE APOLOGIZE.

AT NO POINT DOES HE EVER GROW UP.

[ann-stay]

Brown soft light, fighting the dark shadows-Seungmin

Warnings/au: sadness, angst (?), soft, idk I wrote this ages ago but enjoy!

Please Note: this used to be a W**j*n story however due to recent events I no longer support him, if I’ve missed a part in here where I’ve used his name and didn’t change it please let me know.

She pushed herself away from the desk and slide in the chair to the other side of the room. Groaning, she stood and exited the plain room. She headed to the kitchen for something good, something that could ease her frustration.

It had been like this for a few days, her continuously having to leave her laptop out of anger and frustration. She just couldn't write. She wasn't burnt out, no, she'd already recovered from that. She had major writer's block. Every idea that came to her head didn't flow nicely, nor could she put it into words on the screen.

All knowledge of writing had left her the past few days and it annoyed her to the point where she could break down. She was an online author, so updates were vital to her work. Without updates, she couldn't get views, without views, she didn't get paid. She questioned why she chose such a difficult path.

Swinging the fridge open she grabbed the chocolate and slammed the door shut. She hopped onto the kitchen bench and let her legs hang. It was her favourite thing to do, sit there and think. The bench was surprisingly comfortable and bought a warm homey feeling. She'd done this since she was little.

Taking a bite from the chocolate she looked about her apartment. It was a medium-sized apartment that she lived alone in. Although, her boyfriend would sleep over most nights when he was free. Which he wasn't often, but he made the time.

As far as a normal human could see, her life was good. Dream job, good boyfriend, nice apartment. It was perfect. But it wasn't. She struggled much more then anyone would be able to see. She had struggled with her own mind since she was a young girl. It got to the point, she could hide it from everyone-including the people that were closest to her.

Heck-she'd even isolate herself for a bit and people still wouldn't notice. All except one. Unfortunately, (or fortunately, as she would think) she had gotten better hiding it from said person.

It was scary for her to hide it though. The one person willing to help and that notices everything-she shuts out his help. Every moment she does she knows it hurts him. She hates that. She hates hurting him. So, she continues. Continues to cut him out more and more, hoping that he'll leave and find a better person.

But she doesn't want him to leave. She wants to curl up in his arms and stay there forever. She wants that warmth, love, and support. She wants to feel happy and content.

However, every waking happy moment she has it always turns bad. A light shower of rain, enough to even see a rainbow, suddenly turning into a raging storm that could tear lives apart. But she loves the rain.

The sound of it hitting the glass window. The cold calm feeling it brings with it. The way she would have to wear a sweater every time it rains so she can be comfy and warm. Drinking hot chocolate and watching the droplets fall.

"I don't deserve it..." she mumbled.

The chocolate fell from her hand onto the bench space beside her. A few tears pricking at her eyes as every dark thought seeped their way into her mind. Lacing her brain with its toxins. The plague of the mind. Except this plague is deadlier. Killing someone with a voice in their head. Killing them slowly as they still live. Yet they don't live. They are alive, but they aren't living. As if death himself inhabited them.

A sob escapes her mouth, getting off the bench, making sure she doesn't fall. Her back sliding down the cupboard doors. She pulls her knees as close to her chest as she can, her chubby body making it hard to hug them comfortably.

More sobs leave her trembling lips. Furiously wiping the bucket loads of tears. The lump in her throat making the crying just the more painful. Though she manages to shut them up, the tears were the only thing to show for her breakdown.

The lump in her throat grows, an empty yet full stomach of emotion. Pain. That's all she feels. She didn't know what pain it was. It was like the world had come crashing down even if it hadn't. A feeling that you'd get when you were having fun and then all that happiness was sucked out of you. Exhaustion. Yet it was way more complex and stronger than those feelings. It was a feeling you'd have to experience to understand but a feeling no one should ever experience or understand.

She wanted to scream.

She wanted it to end.

...

Keys rattled.

...

A door clicked, unlocking.

The girl stood quickly and rushed to the bathroom. Forcing her tears away. Rubbing at her face rapidly. Wash, towel, wash towel-repeat a million times. She looked at herself in the mirror.

"Hey, babe?" Her boyfriend called out.

"In the bathroom! I'll be out in a second!" She shouted back.

She smiled a few times, trying to get her face into a 'normal' position rather than one that looks exhausted and broken. The door opened and she stepped out.

"Where are you?" She asked.

"Just in the kitchen," he replied.

She followed his voice and found him taking a bite of her chocolate that was left on the bench. She smiled. He was too cute.

"Come here~ I missed you so much," he whined.

The girl laughed at him before walking over and getting engulfed in a warm hug.

"I missed you too Bubba~"

The boy chuckled at her, lifting her up onto the bench. He stood between her legs and held her at her waist. Her arms rested around his neck, playing with the back of his hair absentmindedly. Their eyes locked and the once happy smile on his face was replaced by a frown and furrowed brows.

"What's wro-"

"You've been crying."

"No, I haven't."

He looked at her, raising his brow.

"You think I don't notice these things?" he asked.

"Notice what things?" She asked, trying to act innocent.

"Things such as your face being slightly red in parts. When you cry your lips get red in patches. Your nose and cheeks also have red patches. Your eyes are slightly glossed over because you can never get the tears all out. Heck, your eyes don't match your smile...babe, what's wrong?"

She lost it. The tears instantly fell, the same world crashing feeling returned. Her head hit his shoulder/neck area and she sobbed, arms wrapping around him tighter. He was taken back for a split second, quickly recovering and pulling her closer.

He whispered sweet nothings into her ear, rubbing her back to comfort her. Her pain, so strong, it filled the apartment to the point her boyfriend could feel it. Like a dark shadow flowing off her body and covering everything. The homey feeling disappearing, replaced with emptiness.

He hated it. Not what his girlfriend had caused but what she was going through. He knew she was pushing him away. He knew that she knew it hurt him. But he also knew that all she needed was some space. He wasn't new to this.

Her isolating herself. In fact, it was good for her to a certain point. The isolation was her recharge. But at some point, in the recharge she always hits, so to say, a malfunction. A percentage where she was so close to being good yet so far.

In this time, he knew to be there for her. To hug her and support her. Not to ask what's wrong but to be there for her. If she needs to talk about it, she will-after asking if it's okay to talk with him a million times.

The sobbing quietened. Soon it stopped. His shirt drenched, but he could care less. A weight lifted from his shoulder. His eyes met her tired and broken ones. They said something, an apology. An apology from breaking down, for being weak, for possibly ruining his shirt, for the toxicity, ruining their night and so much more.

But in his eyes, they held forgiveness and care. He forgave her for everything she apologised for, whether she should've apologised for it or not. He cared about her more then she knew.

She did know though. She just couldn't understand or accept it fully.

They rested their foreheads together, soft breathes tickling each other's faces.

"The voices returned..." she mumbled, eyes closed.

He studied her now calm features, the way her soft lips moved.

"What were they saying this time?"

"Everything."

She opened her glossy eyes and stared into his. No one said anything. They just stared at each other, holding one another close together.

And soon enough, the warmth returned. Her boyfriend's warmth started radiating onto her and their apartment. A soft brown light battling the dark shadow. A sad smile appeared on the girl's face. Then a happy one on her boyfriends.

"You know, your eyes are really cute. And the small scar on your lips is adorable~" He cooed.

A blush etched its way on her cheeks.

"Oh, shush it."

They both laughed.

"Do you want to know something?" She asked.

"Hm?" he hummed in response.

"You, Mr. Kim Seungmin, are the best boyfriend in the world. My Bubba."

She scrunched her face up and squished his cheeks between her hands. Seungmin laughed widely, finding it cute how her face and nose scrunched.

"And you, Ms. Kim, are the best girlfriend in the world. My adorable koala bear."

He returned the favour and squished her cheeks. The girl flushed red and groaned, pushing his hands away.

"Yah! I'm not Ms. Kim...yet. And I'm not a Koala! What are you doing home anyway? I thought you had a meeting?" She asked.

"Soon you'll be, and I can call you a Koala because you sleep a lot and are from Australia. But anyway, Chan canceled it because half of the boys are sick," Seungmin explained.

He placed his hands back onto her waist but holding her closer still. His girlfriends face turned from happy flushed to concerned.

"Why didn't you text me?! We need to go over there so I can help take care of them! I can't believe you left Chan and the others by themselves-" She jumped off the bench and move around frantically looking for her shoes- "They can barely take care of themselves when they aren't sick! Hurry-"

Seungmin hugged her from behind, stopping her from moving.

"No."

"What do you mean 'no' mister. Your friends are sick and I'm worried!"

"I said no. We are staying here together. If Chan needs help, he'll text me-or you. He always messages you first in an emergency remember?"

The girl groaned and nodded.

"Fine..."

"Yay! Now let's cuddle!"

He picked her up, causing her to squeak, and carried her to their bed. He sat on the bed and moved under the cover, still holding his girlfriend.

"Hey! You can't just-"

Seungmin placed a soft, loving kiss on her lips. She smiled and melted into the kiss. When they pulled apart Seungmin had a smirk on his lips.

"Meanie, you can't just shut me up by kissi-"

He kisses her once again. But this time when they pull back, she rolls her eyes at him and turns to face her back against his chest. She cuddles closer to him, pulling his arms around her more, loving the feeling of the warmth.

He laughed at her, nuzzling his face into her shoulder/neck area. Causing giggles to erupt from her at the tickling feeling. Happiness and warmth filled them both.

The storm that was raging moments ago now calm and showing rainbows. The toxic thoughts and feelings now flew far away, unable to hurt either one of them.

There they cuddled, in the middle of the bed wrapped in blankets. Nothing playing. No music, no talking, no sound. Just their breathing and the small kisses here and there. The room was dim as the light faded and the street outside lit it up. It had started to rain, the droplets hitting the window, creating that amazing sound.

Seungmins arms were wrapped tightly around his girlfriend. Loving her squishy, slightly chubby and small figure. The girl rested her head on his chest, her hands resting on top of his. Focus wandering. She soon drifted into a peaceful, content and happy sleep.

Her boyfriend watched her. He noticed the small things. Like the way she blinks with her eyes closed, an indication she was having a dream. The way she would make some expressions like the ones in her dreams. Or how her jaw had to be clenched shut, a habit she made as a kid out of fear of chomping on her tongue by accident.

He noticed how her cheeks flushed red when her body temperature was too high or when it was way too cold. And he even noticed how, when she has a deep sleep her lips get plumper.

He loved her with his whole heart and soul. He noticed all the details and little things. He loved how happy she'd look and feel when he pointed them out as well. It showed her that he cared a lot about her.

He smiled happily, lifting one of his hands up to play with some of her curls that had fallen free from her bun. He chuckled, watching it bounce back into place. He removed her hair tie carefully. Massaging her scalp and playing with her hair.

Soon enough, Seungmin found himself falling into a deep sleep as well.

[hoopdiddies]

I'm Not Over You // Ben Hardy x Reader (Part 2)

Summary: You had always loved Ben ever since you two met at university and became the best of friends. That feeling went out like a candle flame when the two of you parted ways until he re-entered your life...but this time with someone who has already occupied his heart.

Warnings: Fluff, angst, FlUFf, AnGst. Just one mention of alcohol.

WC:2184

A/N: Irrelevant but omg tomorrow's the Endgame premiere. Please pray for my grieving soul.

Tags: @mrsmazzello , @likeit-or-leaveit

"Hey Joe, I'm going to get something from the car. Mind if I borrow your keys?" You ask Joe who's enjoyed a few drinks but hasn't intoxicated himself. He nods in a lousy way and fish his car keys from his back pocket, dropping it onto your open palm. "Bronze key."

"Thanks, Maz." You ruffle his fiery red hair and leave it a mess, making your way back into the kitchen and through the living room. You had expected to at least find Ben close by but he's probably somewhere else. The guests are gradually leaving anyway so that could be a good thing. Upon reaching the front door and swinging it open, you gasp breathlessly at the sight of Ben standing in front of you.

"Oh god, you scared me." You plant your hand on your chest as to catch your breath and punch his arm jokingly. He rubs his nape, chewing on his bottom lip as a playful smile dares to take form on his face. "Yikes, sorry, Y/N. You were little jumpy there."

"No kidding." You raise an eyebrow as you zip past him, in a rush to get to Joe's car.

"Wait, where are you going?" He calls out and you turn, juggling Joe's keys carelessly. "Just going to get something in Joe's car."

With the amused smile still plastered on his face, he glances sideways and strides over to your side. "I'll go with you."

"I think I'm capable of crossing the street, Ben." You fold your arms together yet to no avail he spins you around and leads you across the empty street to Joe's car, squeezing your hand. Your brows furrow at his eagerness but at the same time, you feel your blood accumulate in your face as the way his fingers entwine around yours triggers a weird spark between you.

However elating it feels, you wonder where Rosy is.

"I know, but I had to tell you something, right?" He looks at you over his shoulder with a lopsided smile and you nod, avoiding eye contact. Upon reaching Joe's car, you pull out the bronze key and unlock the driver's seat to retrieve your wallet from the dashboard.

Afterwards, you slam the door shut and secure the lock, slowly turning to Ben to prompt him to talk. He inhales sharply and shoves his hands into his back pockets. "See, I wanted some advice from you. And a little verbal encouragement." He averts his gaze from yours, leaning towards the hood of the car.

Your brows couldn't be any more higher than they already are. "Did you and Rosy bicker?"

"No. But yes. It is about Rosy." It's almost as if he nearly hesitated to say her name but you could've been just hearing things. You encourage him to go on and he does, lacking the will to look you in the eye thereby giving you the inkling that he wants something to progress between them.

"Thing is, do you think I'm ready?" He finally looks at you directly and you smirk. "Ready for what?"

"For you know...that life."

"You're not making any sense, Ben."

He scratches the side of his nose and swears underneath his breath, letting out a faint chuckle. "I'm not good at this."

"Just build up the words right."

"Okay, do you think I'm ready for a new life with her? You know," and out of the fear that he might say the thing you now dread the most, you unconsciously hold your breath in, "settling down?"

It takes a good five seconds for you to fully comprehend the latter words and just as Ben is about to snap his fingers to bring you back to reality, you heave out a rough exhale and force a supportive smile at him. "If you want to, of course."

"What would I be like as a husband?" He just had to ask. Had he meant that in the fictional situation where you were in the place of Rosy, you would have a definite answer. But he's asking you as a friend. As someone who knows you and looks at you from a sibling-like perspective.

You feel yourself crumble from the inside as you open your mouth to answer. "You as a husband? Oh god, the horrors!" You joke to mask the pain.

He rakes his hand through his hair and plays along. "Come on, Y/N. Silly idea but I wanna hear it from you."

"Why me? Why not the girl who inspired you to ask this?"

He takes a light step forward and rubs your shoulders, having his green eyes burn through you. "Because you've known me longer."

Yes, I have. But why did you still pick her? The inner voice in your head cries out. The only rational thing you could do now is be here for him. As you always have. No matter how painful it is, you love him enough to support him with this.

"You as a husband? You wouldn't be perfect, " you pause to look down but after doing so resume, "you'd have your fights, temper tantrums and frankly, I doubt you could be a lot less messier in the morning."

"Y/N-"

"But your ability to love makes up for your imperfections, Ben. I know of Rosy's little episodes and despite her being a mess sometimes, being moody and hard to handle, you loved her regardless," you gently press your palm against Ben's cheek, caressing his skin softly, "you'd be the husband whom she'd wait for at the door every night."

Touched by how delicately you delivered your words, he takes you by surprise and hugs you tight. Your eyes widen for a couple of seconds before finally surrendering to his the beat of his heart, wrapping your arms around him too. No matter how bittersweet the situation is.

You've lived through Ben being that way. He truly is someone you'd always wait for at the door. Someone you wish to wait for.

"How come you're still single?" He asks amusingly and you look up to prevent the tears from falling. "I'm not."

Wait a minute.

Ben quickly releases you from his hold and his expression shifts instantly. "Who's the guy?" He asks you directly and you still haven't recovered from what you just said. In a daze, you ask back. "What?"

"You said you're not single anymore. Who's the lucky guy?"

Why did you say that? You haven't got a clue as to why, it was probably some kind of involuntary thing to fight back the hurt but now that there's no taking back what you said, you play along awkwardly. The somehow bright idea of pretending to be in a relationship to compensate for being in a hopeless situation popping into your mind.

"Um...um. Uh.." You can't think of anyone decent enough but luckily, and unluckily at the same time, you spot Joe jogging across the street over to you and reluctantly, you answer Ben's question.

"Joe!" You say out loud, catching Ben off guard and confusing an approaching Joe. "Hey...guys. What are you two still doing out here?" Joe, clueless to what you just said, asks.

You glance awkwardly at Joe and pull him close to your side. "Yeah, Joe and I are together." You say out of nowhere, making Joe do double-take at you to make sure he's hearing you correctly. Ben's eyes fall as a smile forms on his face. "That's awesome! Since when?"

Just as Joe begins to protest, you answer abruptly before he could utter a word. "Just last week. Sorry for not telling you earlier. We've dated for a while, often so when you and I don't hang out." You swear you could just toss yourself in the middle of the road and hope for a truck to run you over.

As being the only one who knows how you really feel about Ben, Joe seems to catch your drift instantly and what you're trying to pull, so he decides to play along.

"Is that right, mate?" Ben asks curiously and Joe nods in the most casual way possible. "Yeah. Been seeing this lovely girl for a while now."

"I see."

"Ben, darling! There you are!" You close your eyes as you hear Rosy call out from a feet across. Ben shrugs meekly before whisking past you and Joe in his way to Rosy.

"Hey babe, sorry. I was just helping Y/N with something." He smiles down at her. She gives you an almost curt glance and smiles back at Ben. "It's alright. Let's get back inside, it's cold out here."

"Yeah."

You apologize to Joe quietly for involving him in your mess yet he doesn't mind, as long as he's helping you get over it. You suddenly feel the need to get back home to recharge your batteries and escape the unwanted strains you get from seeing Ben and Rosy in each other's arms.

You walk towards them and huff. "Hey, uh, Ben? We better get going. I'm so sorry if I can't stay any longer but I have work tomorrow."

He turns his body to you fully and by the looks of it, he's quite disappointed that you have to go so soon. "Oh. Are you sure?"

You nod and he sighs, giving you one last embrace for the night. "If you have to. Thank you for coming and the gift. You have no idea how much it means to me everytime you're around." You ought to slap yourself everytime Ben says something that just breaks you into two. You rest your head over his shoulder and smile softly. "Of course. Thanks for the time as well. Happy Birthday again."

You pull away deliberately and give him and Rosy one last smile before walking back to Joe. He opens the driver's seat for you and you get in, clipping the seatbelt over yourself.

Accepting that you're now in the arms of someone as trustworthy as Joe, Ben smiles crookedly at him."Don't break her heart. That's just one rule, okay?"

"Never been one to do that. Don't worry." Joe reassures with a wink and gets in after you, the two of you waving at Ben and Rosy before driving off. You immediately take out your phone to text Lucy and Gwilym about your rush to leave the party. After doing so, you place your phone on your lap and cover your face with your hands.

"I'm curious, what prompted you to lie to him about being in a relationship with me?" As eager as ever to hold back a laugh, he asks, keeping his eyes firm on the road.

You throw your head back against the seat and tut. "He thought of proposing to Rosy."

"Seriously?"

"He didn't actually say that, per se. But he gave a clear hint. It didn't even seem like a hint."

"But what if he does propose," he adjusts his rearview mirror all the while stealing glimpses of you, "because I can tell you, when a guy implies like that, it's go time." You shrug weakly, "What can I do but be there for him? Yes it'll hurt, a lot, but seeing him happy is enough."

"Are you sure? You've known Ben longer, heck even loved him longer. Why didn't you ever tell him?" Now that Joe's brought up the question, you begin rethinking what could've been had you told him.

You didn't want to ruin what you already had. Your friendship with Ben was already considered a strong bond, it was on all levels...except romantic. You feared it might have just caused a riff in your relationship and damage what you've built with him through the years.

What if he does propose?

Would you still be strong enough to be around him?

You look out the window and trace your finger across the glass. "It's complicated, Joe."

"Okay," Joe exhales softly and raises his brows at you, pressing his lips to a hard line, "if you're tired, feel free to doze off. You look bummed." You smile at him and pat his hand that's on the gear lever, leaning against the window afterwards to take a nap through the drive back.

--

By the time you arrived home, you give Joe a kiss on the cheek and thank him for the night and particularly for saving your ass when you couldn't think of someone to name as your "boyfriend" at that moment. He bids you good night and drives off.

You kick the door to your apartment open and toss your shoes aside, flopping like a pancake onto the couch and feeling your phone buzz from your back pocket. You take it out and find one message from Lucy, two from Gwilym and...one from Ben.

You narrow your eyes as you skip the first, three messages to read Ben's and find yourself unwillingly tear up at one simple text from him.

Hhhh- Ben:

We finally found our soul mates like we once swore. Thanks for bein here, love. Good night, love you.

Your eyes gloss over those two words once more.

,love you.

If only he knew.

(Part 3 will be posted tomorrow...after I come out of the theatre wheezing uwu)

[chocolatemin]

TIME (ONEUS FANTASY AU)

AMBER'S POV

Once I got inside, the passage immediately shut. Sigh. Why does that always happen? Am I in a sort of horror movie? Cold wind brushed against my cheek caused me to shiver and snap back to reality.

I looked to my surroundings and everything is covered with thick snow while the sky is pale. "Winter?" It's very cold that I can barely move from my position. I hugged myself due to intense coldness. "Why didn't Xion tell me about this?" I started walking trying my best to ignore the freezing wind. "Thank goodness, I am wearing this black leather boots, my feet could've been stuck as soon as I stepped here!" I whispered triumphantly to myself. I can't find any other way except heading straight so I didn't bother to trouble myself.

I was walking and walking until it started to snow, I pulled my hoodie up to lessen the chance of me getting sick due to excessive coldness. I just keep walking as I lost track of time, maybe an hour or two had passed already... I wasn't able to notice that the road is quite bumpy. I slipped and fell down to the pile of snow and landed on my butt. "Ow, ow, not too cold! Ouch, it burns!" I looked up and saw a large, human-sized raven looking down at me with its clawed hand offered to me. I got startled and moved back from it. "Do you want my help or not?" I got more shocked when I heard him speak but regained my composure and took his hand, the feeling of his scaled skin and claw fingers are foreign which sent chills to my body. I thanked him for helping me and apologized for my behavior. "Have you broken some bones?" "Fortunately, I haven't, thank you for your concern." I hesitantly smiled to the large black bird from the crow family.

"By the way, my name is Ravn and don't be afraid, I don't bite." He suddenly turned into a human-like appearance. He has pretty eyes that compliments his other features well. "I'm Amber, I'm looking for the way out of here and was kinda lost, perhaps do you know any exits?" "I do, there's a town plaza nearby the castle, at the back of the castle is the Forest of the Lost which I had heard rumors of having an exit somewhere." "Can you help me go to that place?" "Sure. I'm heading there too. Just follow me." He smiled at me and pulled me beside him before we started walking.

"Do you live here?" I curiously asked him. "Yes." He replied briefly. "Uh, about earlier, why were you in that appearance?" "Oh, I'm sorry about that, it was too cold at that part of the land and was snowing heavily at the woods so I used my hybrid form to keep me warm." "Ah, I see. So I'm guessing you are not a human?" "Not really. I'm from the Human-Crow family, to be specific, the Ravens." "Woah, I think that's cool." "Well, I ain't gonna deny it." I looked up to him and he smiled cheekily. "Why did you choose to walk instead of flying?" "I'm still weak as of now and I cannot fly yet. I had just recovered from cold and fever." "What? Then you shouldn't be here, you could have just stayed home!" I got worried but he reassured me, "I was looking for a certain fruit to cure me, and fortunately I found it and ate it right away. I'm all good now." "You sure?" "Yeah. Don't worry."

We walked in comfortable silence and talked occasionally, it's very easy to make a conversation with him and it wasn't awkward, as if we had known each other for some time. We reached the seventeen o'clock as said on the huge clock in the middle of the plaza. It is not like any other clocks that are up to twelve only, instead, it is up to eighteen. It was really weird. "I'm going to buy dry ingredients at the market. Is it okay for you to wait a bit?" "No problem, I am looking for a botique, is it possible to find it here?" "Yup, are you going to buy clothes for you? Do you have money, I can lend you some if you want." "Don't worry, I have some with me besides I can't stand the coldness wearing these clothes." I sighed and shook my head earning a chuckle from him. "Yeah, yeah, I'll take you there after I buy the ingredients, is it okay?" "It's okay, I don't mind waiting." I smiled at him.

—

Ravn told me to change my clothes in the bathroom. I thought there isn't enough water for them since it's currently winter but I was wrong. The pump has lots of water. Ravn even heated water for me incase I wanted to take a quick bath. As I am taking a quick bath I suddenly remembered the clock on the town plaza, why is it up to eighteen? I'll ask Ravn after. I changed into a white long sleeve ruffle blouse and fitted dress pants that I bought from the botique. It is old fashioned but simple. Ravn told me to just leave my clothes on the small table inside the bathroom. Before I leave, I made sure that the place is clean. I left bathroom feeling warm and refreshed.

I headed to the kitchen where Ravn is preparing the plates. "I'm done, thank you for letting me use the bathroom." "No problem, come here, sit down." He motioned me to sit on the chair opposite to him, "I prepared dinner." I sat down and thanked him. After we ate, I volunteered to clean the dishes while he get changed which he agreed hesistantly not wanting to bother me but I insisted.

"Are you done yet, Amber?" Ravn asked me when he got out of the bathroom. "Yes." I replied as I am drying my hands using the hand towel on the cupboard. He sat down on one of the chairs at the dining table. "Amber, please sit down, I have some questions to ask you." He said sternly which made me quite nervous, so I sat down quickly, "What is it?" "Helping you and letting you stay here doesn't mean I trust you fully and I'm not suspicious, right?" "Well, yeah. I'm still a stranger to you." "I don't want to hurt your feelings." "No, no, not at all. Go ahead."

"What are you?" Ravn realized his question, "I'm sorry it came off like that." "It's okay. I am just a mere human. Next question please." "You said you were kinda lost. How did you end up here?" "Well, I... uh, I entered a gate and was transported here. I don't know if you'll believe that but it's true." "Oh, I see. Are you aware of this place? I bet you don't know anything about the Winter Realm." "It is true that I don't." He sighed at my answer. "Be thankful that I'm the one who found you, if it was the werewolves hybrid, they could have killed you." My body shivered thinking of it. "But why would they kill me?" "They aren't very welcoming to strangers. Plus, you also look suspicious so they'll probably put you to painful death." I cringed at the thought of them tearing my body apart.

"I'm done asking questions, if you want, you can ask me too." My insides calmed down after he said that. "Then, where am I really? What kind of place is this?" My eyebrows furrowed unintentionally. "You're in Winter Realm, and obviously it's winter here. Wherein the season through out the whole year is winter." "What?!" "Yes." "How do you survive in this place? If the snowing is all-year round?" "Most of the citizens here are hybrids, humans are very rare here. And I'm not the only one from the Human-Crow family living here, we're a lot. Also, the werewolves hybrid are living here too. They are the knights of the castle while some of the human-crows are messengers and servants. Some of the hybrids us are just like me, a commoner." Woah, his house is quite big for a commoner's, that's what I thought. "Does that mean that the workers on the botique I bought these clothes, are not human? How about you?" He nodded and I gasped, if Ravn wasn't with me, maybe they won't sell clothes to me. "I sometimes have a duty in the castle as a cook or whatever they need for a special occasion like grand balls, meeting other diplomats but I work part-time on a small restaurant at the town plaza every 27 o'clock until 32."

"Oh, speaking of time, why is the clock up to eighteen?" "Are you referring to the clock on the plaza?" I nod. "It is because a day is equivalent to thirty-six hours, but! The daytime is 'til 12 o'clock only, then the rest is nighttime. That's total of 24 hours of night." "Then, what time is it now?" He looked to the window at the living room and squinted his eyes. "Hmm, according to the clock outside, it's currently passed twenty one o'clock ." "Isn't it late already?" "Not really. Why do you ask?" "In the place where I originally live, it's actually time to sleep by twenty one o'clock." "Really? You may sleep at my bed upstairs." "It's okay. I will just sleep at the couch. Can you take me to the forest later instead?" "That won't be a problem. It's actually my nap time, and I take my naps on the couch." "Oh, then I guess I'll be sleeping on the bed, you may have the couch." We both sat up and I reluctantly went to the three-stepped stairs while he's heading to the living room. "I told you, just sleep on the bed." He laughed while I climb the stairs, I just smiled at him and head to his room. I left the door half-closed since I'm not used to sleeping not in my room and for him to be able to enter without the need to knock.

I can't fall asleep yet so I stood up and went over to the window. The neighbourhood looks peaceful at night, I wonder, what are they doing too? Some are in their houses, while the others have their lights turned off. After admiring the view for some time, sleepiness finally kicked in and I immediately dozed off as I laid down myself.

—

"Amber, you ready?" Ravn asked me after I finished gathering the things I needed. "Well, the keys are here, the coins too, the fruits I bought earlier and the water bladder you gave me. I'm ready to go!" I replied to him happily and put on my sling bag. "Wait!" "Why?" I furrowed my eyebrows at him. "Take this lamp and this dagger, you can't just go to a forest without anything to protect you, especially at night!" He handed me the lamp and the dagger with a smile. I tied the dagger to my waist and hid it under my cloak. "What time is it?" "It's 26:13. I think we need to go now." "I believe so. Let's go?" Ravn opened the door to his house and let me step outside first.

—

Ravn flew me to the back of the castle and we landed safely. I climbed down from him before he transformed back to his human form, "Thank you for this, I cannot give anything back except these coins." I took the purse from my bag and handed it to him, he pushes it back to me saying he's fine but I grabbed his hand, placed the purse on it and shoved it to him and smiled, "No, I insist, take those. I have the half of it in my bag." Lie, I only left a quarter on my bag. "Well, I don't have a choice, you're too persistent." We both laughed knowing he won't win this arguement with me.

"Thank you so much Ravn for everything you did... From helping me on my way to the town, letting me stay the night, to bringing me here. I wish I could have given you anything aside from those coins." "It's alright, Amber. I'm glad I was able to help you. It's our family's rule— to help anyone in need without seeking for something in return." He plastered a smile. "Thank you again, but I think you need to head back or you'll be late for your work and might get paid less than you should have." I replied in a concerned tone, afraid he might think I'm shooing him away. His eyes went wide, looks like he had forgotten it already, I chuckled at the sight. "Oh right, I totally forgot about it, thank you for reminding me. I need to go, bye Amber." He waved to me and quickly transformed into a black raven spreading its magnificent wings. I waved back at him and he looked at me one last time before flying away.

I marched towards the inside of the said forest with excitement and nervousness. The only things I hear are the sound of crickets, owls and my own footsteps. I countinued walking until I heard a howling sound from afar. I got startled and stopped on my tracks for a while. Sure, walking at night– in the woods, with a small light and all alone? Isn't really scary. As I walked deeper and deeper to the forest, the growling of the animal became less and less faint until I spotted a creature not far from me. Its body is covered with black smoke and its eyes are glowing yellow. I stopped on my tracks to prevent further noise and hid the lamp beside me, hoping that the creature won't notice the light and come towards me. Unfortunately, it started walking to my direction causing me to flinch and drop the lamp I was carrying. It jumped infront of me and I wasn't able to move due to fear taking over me.

"Grrr, what is a lady doing here at night? Mayhaps you don't want to be able to see the sunlight tomorrow, eh?" It growled louder and before I could talk it lunged infront of me causing me to fall to the ground. "Please, spare my life." "Ha! You wish. Now, say goodbye." The creature, which somewhat look alike to a lion and wolf at the same time, slowly brings its face closer and opened its mouth widely. Is this where I end already?

-END OF CHAPTER-

[A/N: kskshskksjj-]

previous | next

[doodlelolly0910]

Close Encounters of the Spiritual Kind

Summary: Emma Nolan spent a lot of time alone, and that was fine by her. Because one is never truly alone. She should know. She can talk to dead people. What she didn’t expect was one of these spiritual encounters to hang around, taking her down a rabbit hole of missing women, revenge, and, least expected, love. Can she save the day and Killian Jones? Is there even another choice?

Read it from the beginning on AO3 and FFN!

A/N: So I have been reliably informed that I am cruel and evil for this chapter sooooooo sorry? Lol. Some very big shifts happen here, but I won't say much more because I don't want to give too much away for this chapter or the chapters this affects in the future. You'll have to read and see ;) An especially large thank you this week to @kmomof4 who was very patient and efficient with this chapter, which made it possible for this to be posted on time (I had a really rough week lol) and of course thank you to @courtorderedcake because she's amazing, this art is amazing, and I'm just in awe of her period. *insert Wayne and Garth WE'RE NOT WORTHY bowing here* lol. Y'all are fabulous for all the reviews and favorites and reblogs and even just for reading this. I appreciate each and every one of you. Alrighty, on with the show, I hope you guys like it!

Chapter 13

Despite her better judgement, and the severity of the situation, Emma found herself managing Will Scarlett’s presence quite tolerantly. He reminded her of an annoying little brother, eating her sunflower seeds and spitting them all over himself, fiddling with her radio, trying to go through her console and glove box, making her thankful she’d locked the latter. It held her badge and gun in case of emergency.

“Take another left over here.” He pointed to an upcoming side street, happily bobbing his head to the music and chomping on another handful of seeds. Emma wrinkled her nose as he noisily slobbered shells into an empty convenience store cup.

“Can you not do that? It’s distracting. And disgusting,” she said, turning down the street he’d pointed out. She was glad she'd called Jefferson before they left and let him know she was waiting on Gold because this journey was taking much longer than she thought it would.

“Aw. Have I offended the princess’s delicate sensibilities?” he asked, grinning and still chewing on the seeds in his mouth. “Turn right up here.”

“Where are you even taking me?” Emma asked, complying with his instruction once more.

“Don’t trust me, love? I thought I had an honest face,” he grinned, a black bit of seed lodged in between his second and third upper teeth.  Emma rolled her eyes, and tightened her grip along the steering wheel. Much as she tolerated Will Scarlett, he was still a criminal leading her to a dangerous man in an unknown location. That, and he was infuriating.

“Can’t you just give a single straight answer?” she grumbled and suddenly, she recognized their surroundings. The smell of the sea permeated the vehicle, which was a welcomed break from the floral torture she’d been under for the last day solid, and she took a deep breath. “The docks, huh? I still have my knife if you’re trying to dump a body.” Will snorted.

“Hook would have more than me balls for somethin’ like that. And it’s broad daylight, if ya haven’t noticed,” he pointed out, motioning around them as the car came to a stop. “Not exactly prime conditions for corpse dumpin’.” With a final grin and a waggle of his ridiculous eyebrows, he opened the door and slipped from the vehicle like a cat. Emma was slower to respond, taking in her surroundings and a deep breath as she unbuckled her seatbelt. She exhaled slowly, trying to get her bearings, when her breath cut off short at the sight waiting for her.

Will was making his way towards a small pier where a figure stood staring out over the water. She knew even from behind that it was Killian Jones. His slightly overlong hair moved with the seaspray, his good hand tucked into the pocket of his leather jacket. His weight was supported on one leg, giving him a slight lean, his hook swinging freely at his side. It was exactly like the very first vision Milah had shown her of him. This must be something he did often, and she wondered briefly why he would summon her to a place that obviously meant a lot to him. Will approached him, saying something that she couldn’t hear, and Hook turned to acknowledge the man before setting his sights on her. He said something back, slipping his hand from his pocket and clapping Will on the shoulder but keeping his gaze firmly locked on hers. Shaking her hands out over her lap, she reached for the door handle and got out.

She leaned against the open door as he walked over to her, expression near unreadable, but somehow lighter than anything she’d seen on his face before. As he got closer, his eyes seemed to hold a note of apology and relief, which surprised her. He did throw her out, after all, dismissing her admissions and fears immediately. She couldn’t say without a second thought, because, well, here she was.

“Have you met with Gold yet?” he asked, coming to a stop just on the other side of the barrier the door provided. She raised an eyebrow at that.

“Good to see you again, too. And, yeah, I did,” she said, motioning to the bruise forming on her cheek and the split in her lip where the man in question had struck her. The anger that she was used to seeing in Hook’s eyes flashed there once again and he clenched his jaw making her blink at him in bewilderment. “I’m still in one piece, though, so I mean, it could be worse,” she mumbled, unsure of why she felt the need to reassure him of her well being.

“Aye. It could. Maybe you are a fool after all, Swan,” he said tersely, as if he were scolding a child. This ignited the rage in her belly all over again.

“Okay,” she said, slapping her hands on the top of her door. “Nice to see you again. I’m leaving.” She made to get back in the driver’s seat.

“No, no, wait, love, wait,” he rushed forward, hand and prosthetic held up to stop her. She paused, her lips pursed into a tight line.

Just listen, Milah murmured softly and Emma squeezed her eyes shut at the sound, shaking her head lightly. She blinked them open and scanned the area again, finding Will still patiently waiting on the dock he'd approached Hook on, clearly giving them space. She turned her attention back to Hook, his eyes searching her features as if trying to read her.

“I know you're upset with me,” he began and Emma snorted.

“Understatement,” she scoffed and a surge of jasmine around her made her bite her tongue against further barbs. The last thing she needed was for Milah and Hook to be battling for her attention.

“I know, and I called you here because perhaps I was a little hasty in enforcing your departure.” He nearly winced at the words, looking down and fiddling with his prosthetic with his good hand, and Emma found herself mildly amused by his discomfort. Apology did not seem to be his strong suit.

“So you regret missing an opportunity to recover your mother's ring,” she replied, irritation overriding her amusement. “Anything else?”

His eyes snapped up to hers with a force that almost had her stumbling backwards, a curious intensity to them that almost made the blue brighter and darker at the same time.

“I never told you that was my mother's ring,” he said, his tone low and even. Emma almost swallowed her tongue, fully expecting him to lash out again.

“I- I- uh- you didn't? I'm sure you did because, I mean, how else would I know that?” she tittered nervously, scooting closer to the interior of the car in order to make a quick escape if needed.

Silence descended between them and his eyes settled into a saddened expression, his brow furrowing slightly.

“No, love, I didn't. I haven't spoken of my mother in quite a long time. And the last people I spoke about her with are long gone.” He shifted towards her carefully, his movements slow and obvious, as if she was a wild cornered animal. She felt like one, so it was appropriate.

“Why am I here, Hook?” she said in a cracked voice, much higher than she would have liked it to be. He was standing practically up against the door now, his expression more sincere than anything she'd seen from him yet. There was a glimmer of vulnerability in the depths of his pupils that she was sure he didn't let free often and her heart clenched in her chest at the thought of him letting that side open to her. In this moment, she knew she was dealing with Killian Jones, not Hook.

“I want to help you,” he said with a steady certainty. “Gold is… well, you're in over your head. I'd like to help get you out of this predicament.”

“I can take care of myself,” she ground out. “I'm not a damsel in distress.”

“Of that I have no doubt, Swan,” he said, the mirth returning to his voice. He smirked and rocked back on his heels with a single ridiculously arched eyebrow. “But it would be bad form to leave a lady in distress when I have the power to ease her troubles.” He chuckled a little. “That's something Liam would have said. He was a navy man. Believed in all things done in ‘good form’.” He made air quotes with his hand and hook, eyes glazing in memory, and Emma couldn't help but soften as he spoke of his brother. His gaze came up to meet hers again, raw and honest. “But you already knew that, didn't you?”

Emma's breath caught in her throat as she gauged his expression. Strangely, she found no judgment or malice there this time. Just something that looked an awful lot like hope. She didn't trust her voice, she she offered him a simple wide eyed nod. He smiled, a soft little thing that made him look years younger and infinitely more handsome. Emma blinked a few times against that thought and drew her brows together in confusion. She had a job to do, she reminded herself. No time to be distracted by handsome criminals.

But distracted she was when his good hand came unexpectedly to rest on top of hers, turning it to grasp her fingers, his skin warm and callused on hers. Her heartbeat kicked up a notch and she stared at him, trying to get a read on what was going on.

“I don't know who you are, Emma Swan, or what's happening here, but I think I want to,” he said earnestly and Emma's heartbeat went from moderately fast to breakneck speed, her grip involuntarily tightening on his hand. He smirked at the movement, his tongue coming out to trace over his lips before lifting her fingers to them and placing a kiss on the back of her hand and releasing it easily. Emma didn't know what to do, what to say.

A shrill ringing sound coming from the console inside her car broke the tension and she darted her eyes to the interior.

“I better…” she trailed off, pointing awkwardly into the vehicle before slipping into it and retrieving the phone.

The words UNKNOWN NUMBER flashed across her screen. Emma felt a chill run through her and she fought not to shiver, knowing she was still under Hook's scrutiny.

“Swan,” she answered, a little proud of how businesslike and even her tone was.

“Neverland Shipping Warehouse,” Gold's voice said through the line, clipped and straight to the point. Emma was surprised to hear him on the line, rather than Zelena or another of his goons. “I've sent the address to your phone. There is a crate inside that I need you to get into. It is labelled with a large red X. You have four hours. Do not disappoint me again,” he said coldly and hung up before she could say another word.

DANGEROUS, Milah's voice shrieked out in her head, and Emma frowned deeply, ignoring her and looking down to the phone to confirm she received the information. Once she had, she looked up to see Killian Jones watching her with quiet concern, his hand on her still open door.

“Gold's people, I presume?” he said, his eyes darkening again.

“Ah, the man himself, actually,” she said and Killian looked so surprised it bordered on alarm. “I have to go. Duty calls.” She gave him an apologetic look, then glanced towards the docks to see Will Scarlett heading back in their direction.

She reached for her door, fully intending on making her escape (and making Scarlett Hook's problem), but she was halted by Hook's hand pulling the door gently, but firmly back to him. A puzzled look crossed her face and she jerked her head up to meet Hook's gaze.

“This isn't right, love. I don't think it's wise that you go,” he said, caution painted in every word.

STAY, DANGER, Milah repeated.

Emma scoffed and rolled her eyes at the both of them, pulling the door back to her and out of his grip, shutting it with only a little more force than strictly necessary. She rolled her window down to about halfway and smiled up at him, his face still a mask of stony concern.

“Swan, you're playing with fire here,” he cautioned again.

“Wouldn't be the first time I've gotten burned.” She shrugged and started her little yellow bug, the engine puttering to life. “I'll be in touch.”

As she pulled away with one last reassuring smile, she saw Hook motion sharply for Will Scarlett to get in the black SUV that was parked by a small building. He would get over it. She had to focus on Gold. Then she could worry about him.

The drive was short, thankfully for her nerves. She shot Jefferson a quick text to update him on her location and the plan, and he confirmed it with the usual caution to be safe that made her roll her eyes again. She had more people seemingly concerned for her well being now than she'd had in her whole life.

When she pulled up to the abandoned looking metal building that matched the address Gold had sent her, she was pretty damn sure that Hook and Gold must certainly have the monopoly on the real estate market for places that looked like they'd be a good spot to hide a body.  The building looked like it hadn't been used in at least a decade. It was the last one standing on the block that was surrounded by dilapidated, crumbling structures, buildings that were shadows of their former selves and that should have been set for demolition years ago. A general unease set into the pit of her belly.

Dangerous, Milah murmured in her head again, the sound a feeble plea. Emma supposed she was getting as tired of saying it as she was hearing it. She ground her teeth together. She knew it was dangerous. She had no other choice.

She took a deep breath and pulled her door open, her senses on high alert and the hair on the back of her neck standing on end. The jasmine scent surrounded her still as she moved towards the warehouse, strangely giving Emma comfort that she wasn't alone, even though Milah was adamantly unsupportive of this endeavor.  She scanned the area, making sure no one was watching as she made her way to the door and tried the handle.

Much to her surprise, it wasn't even locked. The door was heavy though and it took several pulls before the rusty old thing swung open on a loud groan that had Emma's heart dropping to her stomach. She quickly looked around as she darted inside, making sure the noise hadn't given her away. She still saw no one in the vicinity and she wondered briefly what was so important and difficult to obtain at this location. She shrugged it off. If this was the way to get back into Gold's good graces, so be it.

The room she found herself in was large and mostly empty, a few empty crates and pieces of abandoned, unstable furniture littering the area. The door shut heavily behind her, making her wince once more. It was quiet. Almost too quiet. But none of that mattered when she spied her prize.

A wooden box sat in the center of the room, not overly large in size, but conspicuous all the same as it looked like it had been recently placed there. The large, spray painted red X on the outside of the box told her she was in the right place.

Emma, leave now, danger, Milah said firmly, her accented voice full of worry, making Emma pause in her tracks. The spirit had never called her by name before and a chill went down her spine.

“I can't, Milah, I have to see this through,” she said, her tone acknowledging the regret she felt in the pit of her stomach.

As she approached the box, one of the corners appeared to be wedged up, giving Emma her in. This was turning out to be far smoother than she thought it would be, which put her even more on alert, especially with the steady warnings her ghostly companion had been offering (not to mention how the last time something was going her way went). She screwed her courage to the sticking place and put her gloved hands on the lid, prying it open. The box was filled with styrofoam peanuts, a paper that looked like a packing slip at first glance sitting on top. She picked it up and unfolded it to read and her blood immediately froze in her veins.

One is not useless if they can be used as an example, dearie.

It was then she noticed the red wire hanging limply from the back end of the lid, most likely separated from whatever it was connected to when she lifted the wooden top. Frantically she shoved the packing peanuts out of the way until she laid her eyes on the something she definitely hadn't been prepared to see.

Several gray blocks of a clay like substance sat surrounding a clock face, a motherboard and wires connecting them all together wedged underneath. She looked at the digital numbers in the center and her adrenaline spiked immediately.

00:12

00:11

00:10

00:09

EMMA RUN, Milah screamed out in her head and she didn't have to be told twice. The paper fluttered to the floor and she scrambled to turn around, her feet carrying her as fast as they could back to the door she came through. The heavy metal door was even harder to open from the inside. She struggled, pulling and yanking on the handle so hard she was almost afraid she was going to pull it off. In one last effort, Emma planted her foot against the door frame and tugged as hard as she could, the groan from the hinges giving way like music to her ears. She stumbled backwards with the force of opening it but quickly righted herself and ran through the door to freedom.

A deafening boom rang out behind her the instant her feet hit the packed dirt outside the door, heat and debris assaulting her back, and then she was falling. She could hear nothing except a high pitched ringing in her ears as her world turned on its axis. Her body rolled midair with the force of the explosion, the sky coming into view above her, flames licking at her peripheries, and her head hit the ground with a crack she couldn't hear in the same spot she had been struck before. She felt immediately ill, her vision blackening at the edges.

Through her haze, she registered two sets of legs running in her direction, but she couldn't see who they belonged to through her rapidly darkening sight.

She must have been going crazy after all,  because the last thing she thought she saw before losing consciousness completely was the profile of her mother's face, the song that had comforted her for years echoing over the ringing in her head.

[woozletania]

Sanctuary, part 2 (full chapter - RR/GOTG slice of life)

Rocket slowly gets used to having another Uplift on board, 96L02 gets a real name, and Rocket makes a catastrophic error that may ruin everything.

"Man, you work fast." Rocket looked up from his plate of eggs and sausage.  He'd wanted to head up to the cockpit - he knew he'd left that panel a mess when he got distracted by Doc Foster's letter and it made his fingers itch to leave something half put together like that - but the others insisted he have at least another full day off to recover. "Whattaya mean?  I haven't worked on anything today.  Just woke up and came out to breakfast." "Really?  I looked in the cabin today and you and Lima were," Pete grinned and made some gestures Rocket couldn't scope out except to guess that they were rude. "Wasn't like that," Rocket growled.  "She was having a nightmare and I was just tryin' to calm her down.  Fell asleep afterward, I guess." "You sure buddy?  It sure looked like you two were-" "I am Groot!" Peter looked up to see Rocket's ears go back and the fangs come out. Groot grabbed Rocket just in time to keep the raccoon from coming across the table at him. "Joke!  Joke!" Peter backed away as Rocket snarled.  "I didn't mean anything by it buddy!" Groot still had his vines around Rocket, who struggled with all his might despite his injuries.  "If you think 'I just rescued this poor little thing, got to jump in bed with her' then I'm not the 'monster' here, Pete!" "That's enough!" Gamora literally put her foot down, stomping the deck plates hard enough that everyone jumped.  "Rocket, Peter was just being stupid.  Peter, apologize." "Sorry man," Peter said.  "I wasn't thinking.  You know me, I say stupid things." Rocket, panting, finally settled down, one hand pressed against his chest.  He still hadn't fully recovered from the gas.  "Yeah, well, don't.  She's not a 'thing.'  Not a toy. Don't call her one. Don't think of her as one either." Lima  ('We really do need to find her a better name, Rocket thought')  poked her head shyly into the common area, drawn by the shouting and the smell of food. Mantis served her a plate of eggs and stood there stroking the yellow creature's head as she ate, smiling at the way Lima pushed back against her palm.  It didn't seem to bother Lima at all to be petted unlike Rocket, who until very recently would snap at anyone who touched him. "What were you fighting about," she said, and Rocket grumbled. "Nothin'. Pete and I fight all time 'bout all sortsa crap." "What I want to know is why pick an otter to Uplift," Peter said, his mouth full of eggs. "What's an otter," Lima said, and Rocket growled. "Probably some stupid thing he thinks you are." "Look Rock, I know you don't like being compared to animals, but we gotta have a species for you, right?  You may not be one but you look exactly like a raccoon and you," Pete pointed his fork at Lima, "You're an otter.  Kind of a big water weasel." Though 'big' was relative, as she was about as heavy as Rocket if a little longer. "I like 'otter,' Lima chirped.  "It sounds funny." "You need to pick a name," Gamora said, and Rocket nodded.  "We can't keep calling you part of your number." "Ottah," Pete said, to which Rocket immediately snapped "No!" "Rocket is named after the men he killed to get free," Drax said with a typical lack of tact.  "You didn't kill anyone, so you can't do that." "Was there anyone at the compound you 'liked?'" Surprisingly it was Mantis who asked. "There was one," Lima said, and for the first time she looked sad. "She snuck me pills when I couldn't sleep after the operations." Though Rocket had just tried to attack Peter, Pete still put his hand on the raccoon's shoulder when he saw Rocket grit his teeth and look away.  "It's OK, man." "But they caught her," Lima said, looking down at her plate.  "I never saw her again. Her name was Lilla." "Lylla," Drax said. He didn't quite have it right, but close. "I like it." "I do too," Peter said.  "Rocket?" "I told you, it's not our decision.  What do you think," he said to the otter. "Lylla?  If I had gotten out another way I might have named myself after the nice one. It's up to you, though." "Lylla," said the otter.  "I like it too. I'm Lylla!" She beamed, and only Rocket didn't match her smile. He had his reasons. "Okay, Lylla," Rocket said a moment later.  "Speaking of nice guys.  I want you to meet a friend of mine soon. He's a doctor." And just like that all the joy vanished from Lylla's face, replaced by horror. "No," she said, dropping her plate.  "No, no, no." She fell to all fours and scurried back towards her room. From the back you could see the shaved areas, the implants, the scars, though they weren't as bad as Rocket's had been. The raccoon was right after her on all fours as well.  "Lylla!  Let me explain!" "Wait, Peter," Gamora said.  "Give him a minute. He's the one who knows why she is afraid." "We all know why she's afraid," Drax said. "But he's the one who lived that life," Gamora said, and Peter reluctantly sat back down. "I am Groot?" "He's in my cabin with our guest," Peter said as the three-foot-high tree tree arrived. He didn't really understand Groot yet but he at least knew the tree was looking for Rocket. "She's really upset and he went to talk to her." "I am Groot!" "Wait, Groot," but it was too late. The tree was already hot after his friend. By the time Rocket reached the cabin Lylla had burrowed into the nest of blankets she'd pulled into the padded pet bed.  All that showed was a shivering yellow tailtip and Rocket pulled up short, sure she'd snap at him if he climbed in too. He would. "Lylla, listen," he said, settling down cross-legged a pace away.  "No one's going to make you see a doctor if you don't want.  It's your choice.  Everything's your choice now." A whiskery muzzle appeared out of the blankets, and Rocket winced to see the tears in her eyes.  "Really, Rocket?" "Yeah.  I should've explained..." "I am Groot." Rocket smiled as a vine came to rest on his shoulder.  "It's all right, buddy. Lylla's just scared.  I was scared too, remember." "I am Groot!" "Yeah. Lylla, a while back my back was messed up.  Cybernetics problems, scars, infection. It hurt all the time but I'm scared of doctors, same as you are." The whiskery face visible under the blanket nodded.  "Because they hurt us. They make us into things they want us to be, not what we want to be," she chirped. "When they made me, I hated them so much," Rocket said, and his muzzle dipped until he was looking at the floor, not Lylla.  "They cut me open and tortured me to train me.  I wanted to kill them all.  But there was one who wasn't cruel.  He brought me pills to take away the pain." Slowly the otter's head rose up out of the covers as she listened.  "I started to save them. Hid them.  I counted them every day.  Soon I'd have enough to make the pain go away forever." "Oh Rocket," she said, tears running down her cheeks.  "Me too." He sniffled.  He was too emotional these days.  Teared up too easily. "But then I got out.  I'm a monster, Lylla.  A killer. I try to change, to be good, but they made me to kill.  And that's what I did.  I killed my way out.  Except for the one nice doctor." Finally he met her gaze, his eyes as wet as hers.  "Him I couldn't kill.  He's why I am...only a little bit monster.  If it weren't for him I would have killed and killed and killed. Instead I'm a Guardian of the Galaxy." "I am Groot," the tree behind him said, and grew more vines to support Rocket.  The raccoon was still weak, still recovering. "When the other Guardians found out how bad my back was they made me see someone.  I picked the guy who kept me sane. That's who I want you to see, Lylla.  I can hear your pain when you move.  I know they messed you up. Doc Foster can help. He's the guy who brought me the pills.  He's the reason I'm here instead of dead or crazy." "I don't know, Rocket..." "I'll be there, Lylla.  We'll all be there.  He won't hurt you, he's my friend, but if he does, if anyone hurts you...I try to be good, Lylla.   But if anyone hurts my friends, hurts you, I'll be a monster again." "Yeah," came a voice from the doorway as Peter leaned in for a moment. "We'll all be monsters if someone hurts our friends." The other Guardians nodded from the hall. "I am Groot," Groot said. "What did he say," Lylla chirped. "That he'd do anything for his friends," Rocket said, and put his hand on the vine draped across his shoulder. "And he would. He has." "All right," Lylla said, unknowingly echoing Rocket, a few months back.  "As long as you're there." "Good." Rocket nodded.  "You wanna go have some more breakfast? You hardly ate at all." "I just want to rest," she chirped, and burrowed back under the blankets.  "They never let me just lie around like this. I'll eat later." "Okay." Rocket climbed to his feet using Groot for support. His leg still hurt, oddly worse than the neck bite that almost killed him. And his chest, though that was slowly getting better. A voice came from under the blankets. "Please don't go, Rocket.  I was so afraid last night, with all this metal around, like a cage.  Then I woke up and you were there. Having you there made me feel so safe." "Well, I'm supposed to be resting too I guess," Rocket said doubtfully, and then he protested as Groot picked him up.  "Hey, you don't need to carry me, dummy. I'm not that hurt." But Groot didn't listen, easing him into the padded bed with the otter, and there was a confusion of slow movements as she emerged from beneath the covers and curled around him. Rocket was so warm, and comfortable, and safe, that the protests just drained out of him. "Thank you, Rocket," she chirped into his ear, and Rocket thought, 'Ain't not thing like me, 'cept me. Except maybe there is, now.  Or close enough.' ***** They woke a few hours later, curled together in the round padded bed.  Rocket twitched awake at the unfamiliar sensation of someone sleepily grooming his nape. For a moment he went stiff with panic, then slowly relaxed.  The fabric of the bed was thick with his scent, and now, that of Lylla as well.  It was good to wake and not be alone. It wasn't like the many times he'd woken in a pile of sleeping bodies in prison.  Those bodies didn't smell or feel good. Lylla did. Peter didn't know that one reason he took so easily to what he knew was a bed made for an animal was that snuggling into it brought back vague memories of warm fur and safety. When he could smell himself on it he knew that it was -his- bed, his safe place to sleep.   Now there was another scent on the fabric as well, and for the first time it wasn't some bald sweaty creature's.  It was a scent he liked. But he had work to do. Rocket crawled from the bed, tugging off his ship-tunic for a new one. (He liked being surrounded by a cloud of his own scent.  The other Guardians weren't so fond of the idea.)  Lylla shifted uneasily in a bed, missing the warm presence of another body, and an implant stood out for a moment from the dense fur of her shoulder.  The covers moved enough that some of the shaved areas on her back were exposed and Rocket snapped his fingers.  He knew he'd forgotten something and  after a brief trip down the hall he was back with his C-bag, or what he called the pouch with most of his cybernetics tools. Somewhere in the ship Peter was playing his music and Rocket hummed along to the familiar tune as he sorted his tools.  Shallow scanner, deep scanner, three sizes of input plugs (he had a port on his back for the middle one for diagnostics, Lylla had one at the back of her neck that looked like the larger size).  Diagnostic unit, phase comparator, various wrenches, magnetic grapple for remotely aligning servos. Replacement parts if he needed them, including the ones he'd scavenged in the complex where he found Lylla. There was a certain compulsion to get them all perfectly arranged before he started to work that he couldn't explain.  They had to be aligned just so, and after all he would know where to reach for one if he got them all set up ahead of time, right? That was why though he had no intention of using them, he still had out the cutting tools and scalpels when Lylla woke up. She blinked awake and the first thing she saw was a glittering array of tools, knives and blades. With a terrified squeak she was out from under the blankets so fast they hovered in the air and disappeared through the door. Rocket was left staring at the empty bed before he slapped a hand on his forehead. "Stupid!  Stupid, stupid, stupid." And then he was out the door on all fours as well, calling after her.  "Lylla!  Wait, I'm sorry, I can explain!" Drax paused in his leisurely trip down the hall as Rocket shot between his legs. He stood still for a moment to make sure he didn't step on the ringed tail whistling past and shrugged.  "Uplifts." Rocket followed Lylla's scent until he found her backed under one of the common area bunks, shivering with fear and snarling at him as he approached. Mantis peeked in from the doorway but just stood there, letting the two of them work it out. He started by apologizing again.  "Lylla, I'm sorry.  I've been planning to look at your implants so I can send some scans ahead to Doc Foster.  I wasn't going to do anything until you were awake and only with your permission.  I was just sorting my tools, okay?  I was just going to scan you.  No scalpels." "I saw them," she growled.  "I saw them." "They weren't for you!  I just had them out to sort them.  I sometimes use them, but it's on me or Gamora.  I swear, I'll never touch you unless you let me." It took ten more minutes to finally talk her out of her hidey-hole, and then only because he promised to put the tools away.  When he got back from doing that he found she'd made her way to galley and that Mantis and Peter had set the table for a late breakfast. Lylla wouldn't look at him and Rocket sat awkwardly across the table, only eating a few bites though he was hungry.  Lylla on the other hand dug into reheated eggs and sausage.  She was clearly evolved from a carnivore and quickly cleaned her plate with her sharp fangs. By the time she finished licking her long whiskers Mantis served her a second helping. Like Rocket, though, she was much smaller than the rest of the crew and even if he ate as much as she did, two hungry Uplifts ate less between them than Drax did at one sitting. Rocket's wrist beeped and he checked the time.  "Gotta call the doc. Be back in a bit." Lylla nodded and kept eating, but as soon as the raccoon headed up the stairs she turned to Mantis. "Do you trust Rocket?" Mantis tilted her head like an inquisitive Uplift.  "Of course I do.  Why?" Lylla just shrugged and went back to eating as up in the cockpit, Rocket ran into Peter. "Two days in a row I'm chasing her around trying to apologize," Rocket grumbled. "Get used to it, pal." What's that supposed to mean?" Peter smiled. "Women, y'know?" Rocket just flicked an ear and tapped controls to open a connection.  "Hello, this is Doctor Foster's office," said the voice at the other end. "So turns out Nova Corps sent all the other Uplifts from the compound to Doc Foster too," he said to the Guardians (and Lylla) a little later.  "I put in a good word for him and he's happy for the business but there isn't a slot in his schedule for Lylla until next week." Lylla still wouldn't talk to him and half an hour later Peter found him sewing blankets.  Rocket  scrounged up some older ones from the ship's stores and had rolled and stitched two up into long narrow cylinders.  Peter watched him as he started to sew one into a tight spiral.  Eventually he figured out what he was seeing. "Making another bed?" "Yeah," Rocket said, continuing the spiral with the second blanket.  Soon enough he was working on the raised rim around the central spiral pad. "I don't wanna leave Lylla alone but I don't know if she wants to share a bed now.  I was real dumb earlier.  Now she doesn't trust me." "Let me tell you man, I've been there.". Rocket had several high-tech devices for sewing but at the moment he was doing it the old fashioned way, with needle and thread.  "I didn't know you knew how to sew." "'Course I do.  Gotta work on my armor, they don't make sets my size. And shirts, stuff I wear 'cos you complain when I walk around naked.  Sometimes you gotta hand pack explosives and sew cases around 'em and you can make pretty good garrotes out of cloth." "What's a garrote?" "Strangling cord.  You know, gik!" Rocket mimed being strangled. "When would you need one of those?" "Don't ask questions you don't wanna know the answers to, Pete." A few hours earlier Lylla stuck to Rocket like a second tail but now she avoided him. Instead she was never more than a step from Mantis, which didn't bother the empath at all.  She stroked Lylla's spine as they talked. "Why is he so angry all the time?" "He isn't," the empath said.  "He's much better now than when I first met him. The first time I tried to pet him he bit me." "And I think," she went on, "That except for Groot, everyone Rocket met before he knew us hurt him in one way or another. Being around people just means there are more ways for him to get hurt, so he's...angry.  If people are afraid of him, maybe they won't hurt him." "I am Groot," said the tree, arriving as though summoned by his name. "Yes, he's brave," the otter said.  "Because he has to be?" Mantis's antennae twitched.  "You can understand him?" "A little," the otter said.  "More as I hear him.  Linguist!". She smiled and touched her head.  It would have been cute had the lines of operation scars not stood out on her skull when her fingers flattened the fur. One deck up Rocket's ear twitched as he thought he heard his name.  Peter had left and he could make his second call of the day, the one the other Guardians didn't need to know about. "It's really you," said the man in the yellow prison jumpsuit on the screen. "89P13." "Subject Eight-Nine-Papa-One-three does not report for duty, asshole," Rocket growled, though an involuntary twitch ran through his body as he said it. Even now the compulsion to spring to attention was hard to resist. "Listen close," he said.  "'Cause you only get to hear this once.  You're going to get out of jail pretty soon.  Good lawyers, lots of money, and some dead guys you can scapegoat. Good for you. When you get out, I'll be watching. You touch another animal, I don't care what for...I was nice when I came in.  Most of you guys survived.  But we only got about half the Uplifts out.  So next time I won't be nice. And I'll take my time with you, personally. Don't make me come looking for you, Doctor Zek." With that he cut the connection.  His contacts in Nova Corps had only given him a private channel for a few minutes anyway. Grumpy and bored, a combination his crew mates had learned to fear, he fetched his B bag (general maintenance) and crawled halfway into a control console to finish repairs he'd started two days before. He was still sore but he had to get back to work sometime. It was fortunate that his hands knew what to do even when his mind was elsewhere, because he was distracted. 'How could I have been so stupid?  Of course she'd panic if she saw surgical tools.' He was just starting to get used to having her around and maybe, maybe just a little, starting to like her. But he'd never been in the situation of treating a fellow Uplift.  Gamora and Nebula knew what cyborg maintenance entailed. Lylla only knew that seeing tools like that meant pain. "Stupid," Rocket growled, and bashed a wrench against a component that was usefully both frangible and expendable. 'Maybe I'm getting soft.' He'd gotten along just fine without another Uplift on board, and she wasn't likely to stay long anyway, right?  Get on with his life, that was the thing to do. Just think about work, money, booze.  No need to think about the nice-smelling otter he'd shared a bed with these last two nights. And so that night when he showed Lylla the other bed and proposed they sleep side by side, not together, he wasn't too disappointed when she nodded. That was what he told himself, anyway. 'At least I can smell her,' Rocket thought, then quickly quashed that thought. He slept badly.

[woozletania]

Sanctuary, part 2 (RR/GOTG slice of life)

(Actually about half S2, but this is what I have ready at the moment.  The full version will be done when it’s done. You really have to read the first one to understand why an otter is on board the Milano and why everyone calls her Lima at first.)

"Man, you work fast." Rocket looked up from his plate of eggs and sausage.  He'd wanted to head up to the cockpit - he knew he'd left that panel a mess when he got distracted by Doc Foster's letter and it made his fingers itch to leave something half put together like that - but the others insisted he have at least another full day off to recover. "Whattaya mean?  I haven't worked on anything today.  Just woke up and came out to breakfast." "Really?  I looked in the cabin today and you and Lima were," Pete grinned and made some gestures Rocket couldn't scope out except to guess that they were rude. "Wasn't like that," Rocket growled.  "She was having a nightmare and I was just tryin' to calm her down.  Fell asleep afterward, I guess." "You sure buddy?  It sure looked like you two were-" "I am Groot!" Peter looked up to see Rocket's ears go back and the fangs come out. Groot grabbed Rocket just in time to keep the raccoon from coming across the table at him. "Joke!  Joke!" Peter backed away as Rocket snarled.  "I didn't mean anything by it buddy!" Groot still had his vines around Rocket, who struggled with all his might despite his injuries.  "If you think 'I just rescued this poor little thing, got to jump in bed with her' then I'm not the 'monster' here, Pete!" "That's enough!" Gamora literally put her foot down, stomping the deck plates hard enough that everyone jumped.  "Rocket, Peter was just being stupid.  Peter, apologize." "Sorry man," Peter said.  "I wasn't thinking.  You know me, I say stupid things." Rocket, panting, finally settled down, one hand pressed against his chest.  He still hadn't fully recovered from the gas.  "Yeah, well, don't.  She's not a 'thing.'  Not a toy. Don't call her one. Don't think of her as one either." Lima  (We really do need to find her a better name, Rocket thought)  poked her head shyly into the common area, drawn by the shouting and the smell of food. Mantis served her a plate of eggs and stood there stroking the yellow creature's head as she ate, smiling at the way Lima pushed back against her palm.  It didn't seem to bother Lima at all to be petted unlike Rocket, who until very recently would snap at anyone who touched him. "What were you fighting about," she said, and Rocket grumbled. "Nothin'. Pete and I fight all time 'bout all sortsa crap." "What I want to know is why pick an otter to Uplift," Peter said, his mouth full of eggs. "What's an otter," Lima said, and Rocket growled. "Probably some stupid thing he thinks you are." "Look Rock, I know you don't like being compared to animals, but we gotta have a species for you, right?  You may not be one but you look exactly like a raccoon and you," Pete pointed his fork at Lima, "You're an otter.  Kind of a big water weasel." Though 'big' was relative, as she was about as heavy as Rocket if a little longer. "I like 'otter,' Lima chirped.  "It sounds funny." "You need to pick a name," Gamora said, and Rocket nodded.  "We can't keep calling you part of your number." "Ottah," Pete said, to which Rocket immediately snapped "No!" "Rocket is named after the men he killed to get free," Drax said with a typical lack of tact.  "You didn't kill anyone, so you can't do that." "Was there anyone at the compound you 'liked?'" Surprisingly it was Mantis who asked. "There was one," Lima said, and for the first time she looked sad. "She snuck me pills when I couldn't sleep after the operations." Though Rocket had just tried to attack Peter, Pete still put his hand on the raccoon's shoulder when he saw Rocket grit his teeth and look away.  "It's OK, man." "But they caught her," Lima said, looking down at her plate.  "I never saw her again. Her name was Lilla." "Lylla," Drax said. He didn't quite have it right, but close. "I like it." "I do too," Peter said.  "Rocket?" "I told you, it's not our decision.  What do you think," he said to the otter. "Lylla?  If I had gotten out another way I might have named myself after the nice one. It's up to you, though." "Lylla," said the otter.  "I like it too. I'm Lylla!" She beamed, and only Rocket didn't match her smile. He had his reasons. "Okay, Lylla," Rocket said a moment later.  "Speaking of nice guys.  I want you to meet a friend of mine soon. He's a doctor." And just like that all the joy vanished from Lylla's face, replaced by horror. "No," she said, dropping her plate.  "No, no, no." She fell to all fours and scurried back towards her room. From the back you could see the shaved areas, the implants, the scars, though they weren't as bad as Rocket's had been. The raccoon was right after her on all fours as well.  "Lylla!  Let me explain!" "Wait, Peter," Gamora said.  "Give him a minute. He's the one who knows why she is afraid." "We all know why she's afraid," Drax said. "But he's the one who lived that life," Gamora said, and Peter reluctantly sat back down. "I am Groot?" "He's in my cabin with our guest," Peter said as the three-foot-high tree tree arrived. He didn't really understand Groot yet but he at least knew the tree was looking for Rocket. "She's really upset and he went to talk to her." "I am Groot!" "Wait, Groot," but it was too late. The tree was already hot after his friend. By the time Rocket reached the cabin Lylla had burrowed into the nest of blankets she'd pulled into the padded pet bed.  All that showed was a shivering yellow tailtip and Rocket pulled up short, sure she'd snap at him if he climbed in too. He would. "Lylla, listen," he said, settling down cross-legged a pace away.  "No one's going to make you see a doctor if you don't want.  It's your choice.  Everything's your choice now." A whiskery muzzle appeared out of the blankets, and Rocket winced to see the tears in her eyes.  "Really, Rocket?" "Yeah.  I should've explained..." "I am Groot." Rocket smiled as a vine came to rest on his shoulder.  "It's all right, buddy. Lylla's just scared.  I was scared too, remember." "I am Groot!" "Yeah. Lylla, a while back my back was messed up.  Cybernetics problems, scars, infection. It hurt all the time but I'm scared of doctors, same as you are." The whiskery face visible under the blanket nodded.  "Because they hurt us. They make us into things they want us to be, not what we want to be," she chirped. "When they made me, I hated them so much," Rocket said, and his muzzle dipped until he was looking at the floor, not Lylla.  "They cut me open and tortured me to train me.  I wanted to kill them all.  But there was one who wasn't cruel.  He brought me pills to take away the pain." Slowly the otter's head rose up out of the covers as she listened.  "I started to save them. Hid them.  I counted them every day.  Soon I'd have enough to make the pain go away forever." "Oh Rocket," she said, tears running down her cheeks.  "Me too." He sniffled.  He was too emotional these days.  Teared up too easily. "But then I got out.  I'm a monster, Lylla.  A killer. I try to change, to be good, but they made me to kill.  And that's what I did.  I killed my way out.  Except for the one nice doctor." Finally he met her gaze, his eyes as wet as hers.  "Him I couldn't kill.  He's why I am...only a little bit monster.  If it weren't for him I would have killed and killed and killed. Instead I'm a Guardian of the Galaxy." "I am Groot," the tree behind him said, and grew more vines to support Rocket.  The raccoon was still weak, still recovering. "When the other Guardians found out how bad my back was they made me see someone.  I picked the guy who kept me sane. That's who I want you to see, Lylla.  I can hear your pain when you move.  I know they messed you up. Doc Foster can help. He's the guy who brought me the pills. He's the reason I'm here instead of dead or crazy." "I don't know, Rocket..." "I'll be there, Lylla.  We'll all be there.  He won't hurt you, he's my friend, but if he does, if anyone hurts you...I try to be good, Lylla.   But if anyone hurts my friends, hurts you, I'll be a monster again." "Yeah," came a voice from the doorway as Peter leaned in for a moment. "We'll all be monsters if someone hurts our friends." The other Guardians nodded from the hall. "I am Groot," Groot said. "What did he say," Lylla chirped. "That he'd do anything for his friends," Rocket said, and put his hand on the vine draped across his shoulder. "And he would. He has." "All right," Lylla said, unknowingly echoing Rocket, a few months back.  "As long as you're there." "Good." Rocket nodded.  "You wanna go have some more breakfast? You hardly ate at all." "I just want to rest," she chirped, and burrowed back under the blankets.  "They never let me just lie around like this. I'll eat later." "Okay." Rocket climbed to his feet using Groot for support. His leg still hurt, oddly worse than the neck bite that almost killed him. And his chest, though that was slowly getting better. A voice came from under the blankets. "Please don't go, Rocket.  I was so afraid last night, with all this metal around, like a cage.  Then I woke up and you were there. Having you there made me feel so safe." "Well, I'm supposed to be resting too I guess," Rocket said doubtfully, and then he protested as Groot picked him up.  "Hey, you don't need to carry me, dummy. I'm not that hurt." But Groot didn't listen, easing him into the padded bed with the otter, and there was a confusion of slow movements as she emerged from beneath the covers and curled around him. Rocket was so warm, and comfortable, and safe, that the protests just drained out of him. "Thank you, Rocket," she chirped into his ear, and Rocket thought, 'Ain't not thing like me, 'cept me. Except maybe there is, now.  Or close enough.'