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#i know they’ll come around I’m just mad this happened
thelovelybitten · 8 months
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“Why? What’s the point of living when the only girl I’ll ever love is gone?”
“No dude, i feel worse.”
“Dude, i don’t have time to start over with other girls. I’m nine years old, dude. If i don’t work things out with Wendy, I could be alone my whole life.”
“I can’t let Wendy go. This whole time, I’ve been having my friends do all the talking for me. It’s time i took control.”
“Tell her i love her.”
“I can’t believe it. She’s in love with someone else.”
“There’s nothing else i can do. She was my whole life.”
And antis really think Stan doesn’t care about Wendy. Weird.
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willowfey · 1 year
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no one can make u feel crazier than ur mother<3
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chunghasweetie · 4 months
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𝐖𝐎𝐍’𝐓 𝐓𝐎𝐔𝐂𝐇 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐌𝐄 | J.JK
— part 1
— pairing | fem!oc x dealer!jjk
— summary | after a petty argument jungkook spots you showing out at a party with the hosts arm around your waist
— warning | bad writing (i’m doing my best)
unprotected sex, toxic fwb, lots cursing, jealousy, angst, ratchet behavior, dirty talk, angry sex, belittling, drinking, smoking🍃, womanizer behavior, breeding kink, both 🚩🚩 , daddy kink, degrading, slapping (face), false accusations, double standards
— word count | 6.2k words
— song suggestion | love you like me — william singe
He was blocked once again.
He didn’t even know for what this time.
Well, he had a good idea.
Running his mouth again. They always argued and he was always blocked and unblocked.
This time he think he actually irritated you.
“Goddamnit Y/n.” He cursed. He pissed you off once again but now his number and his Instagram was both blocked by you.
For some reason this time irked him more than the others.
“You’re still stressing over that girl?” Jimin plopped on the couch next to him.
“I can’t believe you still fuckin on her.” Taehyung walked in, taking a seat on the couch too.
“That’s my girl ya’ll know that.” Jungkook bit his lip, staring at his blank phone screen.
“You need to get like how you used to. 3 or more at a time. Always.” Jimin spoke, “You used to be like that. You used to make fun of guys like you. Now you’re giving out free shit to some girl.”
“I mean he does get pussy from it but like, only her bro?” Taehyung looked at Jungkook. “You used to have all these girls on you. Stephanie, Nari, Seunghee, Belle, Maya… What happened to you man?”
Jungkook thought about what they said. “Shits just different now.”
“Oh my gosh she’s ruined you.” Jimin groaned. “Nah man. We’re going to a Jackson party.”
“He’s having a party?” Jungkook looked up from his phone. “Why haven’t I heard anything about it?”
“Because you’re too busy stressin’ about some bitch.” Jimin shook his head.
Before Jungkook could correct him, Jimin corrected himself. “Some girl. Before you start.”
“Anyway, it’s tonight.” Taehyung spoke.
“So bring whatever cash you got and we’re definitely gonna send you home with a girl or two.” Jimin swung his arm around his shoulder.
“Oh shit I think she’s posting about you Jeon!” Taehyung was on her phone, immediately making Jungkook’s head snap over.
“Really?!”
“No man.” He laughed. “We really gotta get you more girls. You need more pussy than just her.”
“Yeah, no more Y/n.” Jimin shook his head.
“Whatever.”
༊—
“I’m so jealous.” Seungyeon swooned over the text messages on your phone.
“I don’t see why. This looks annoying as hell.” Elkie rolled her eyes.
Jungkook🍃
Wyd
Lemme come over
I got shit for you and your friends
Omg fucking answer
You’re mad annoying
I ain’t even mean what I said fr just reply 😭
“I think it’s cute. And hilarious.” Seungyeon chuckled. “What made you block him this time?”
“He was bragging about how many girls he sells to. How they’re all pretty and thick as hell. So I just said ‘cool’ and blocked him.” You shrugged.
You and your friends had been getting ready for hours for a Jackson Wang party they had personally been invited to.
“You better not hope he doesn’t pull up tonight.” Elkie spoke.
“Yeah Y/n. Taehyung’s going and I’m sure they’ll try to convince him.” Seungyeon told her.
“He’s probably too busy getting high in his room.” Elkie replied. “Or selling in the east side.”
“Wouldn’t doubt it.” You shook your head. “I kinda do wish he would be there though.”
“Is his dick really that good?” Elkie asked you as she was baking her makeup.
“Unfortunately it is. Like, real good.” You started to get flashbacks.
“Here she goes.” Seungyeon rolled her eyes.
“He fucks me sooo good yall don’t get it.” You began. “Even though he’s annoying and shit I’ve never had dick like his. Once we started recording our shit I can’t stop rewatching.”
“You aren’t worried he’ll show people?” Elkie asked.
“They’re all on my phone. He only has a few. Even if he does show his homeboys it’s whatever. He’s damn near louder than me anyway.” You told her.
Your phone went off, making you look over at it to see the notification.
kplug🍃 has added you on Snapchat
“Oh my gosh.” You said out loud, immediately making the girls look over.
“He fucking added you on Snapchat!” Elkie laughed out loud, “He’s crazy”
“And on his plug account?” Seungyeon’s eyes widened. “He’s obsessed.•
“What can I say? This pussy makes him insane.” You jokingly boasted.
“Did you add him back?” Seungyeon asked.
“Nah not yet. I’ll wait until I’m almost done getting ready.” You tossed your phone on your bed.
“Yeah that’ll be better.” Elkie nodded.
“Ugh I need to hurry anyway. I’m tryna look good tonight.” You groaned, looking at your barely half done makeup.
No matter what it was, you loved to look good. You were a confident woman who took pride in her appearance.
Tonight mattered. You hadn’t took good pictures in quite some time and Jackson’s party was the best place to take them at.
You had just changed up your hair last night. You had a brown base with blonde highlights. And for tonight you decided to add gold and bronze tinsel to elevate your look.
Your friends always had the same energy, wanting to look as good as they could even if it was a simple occasion.
Seungyeon and Elkie definitely showed out with you tonight.
You all had skimpier outfits on tonight. You were a low cut brown latex top with a matching black mini skirt.
Your heels were black and the strings wrapped up around your mid calf. You sprayed your expensive perfume all over, making sure you smelt as good as you looked.
Your makeup was finally done for the night and it couldn’t have looked better. You looked incredible.
The girls had taken some pre party pics in your room, posting on all social media.
“Oh Y/n! Add him back.” Seungyeon told you.
You nodded, adding Jungkook back on Snapchat.
“He’s gonna see all our videos at the party. He’s gonna regret saying all that shit to you.” Elkie laughed. “Gonna see so many dudes all up on you and start punching walls and shit.”
“He probably already is and we haven’t even left the house yet.” Seungyeon laughed with her. “The pictures we posted right now are enough to make him tear his hair out.”
“Damn right.” You giggled. “Yall got everything? I’m about to order the Uber.”
Both girls nodded, making sure they had everything they needed.
kplug🍃 just sent you a snap
You looked at the notification, “Hm.” You hummed to yourself, not opening his snap quite yet.
Once the uber pulled up all of the girls climbed in, taking more pictures in the backseat on the drive there.
You lived in a nice area, but nothing compared to Jackson’s place.
The location was one of his many homes,
“Jackson lives so far from us.” Elkie looked at the map on her phone.
“Yeah but his area is so nice. It’s worth it.” Seungyeon added. “I wonder how many people are gonna be there.”
“Girl you know it’s gonna be so packed we gonna have to get dropped off damn near a mile away.” You laughed.
“You better hope Jungkook doesn’t show up.” Elkie looked over at you, who was just opening his snap.
The snap was him a car, sitting in a car full of tackily dressed women right corner of him. One of the girls was taking the picture for him.
“I should’ve just shut up.” Elkie covered her mouth. “They’re definitely going.”
“He’s petty as hell!” Seungyeon looked over at your screen. “What does he expect you to say to that?”
“Probably nothing.” Y/n turned off the phone. “He wants to be like that he can go right ahead.”
“You’re so cool about it.” Seungyeon looked at her in amazement. “I would’ve went batshit crazy.”
“I’m not trippin because I’m not holding back at this party.” She laughed.
༊—
“Why would you guys do me like this?”
“You’re so dramatic.” Jimin rolled his eyes. “We found you a car full of girls to take to the party and you’re complaining.”
“Didn’t ask for it. Y’all make me look like a charity case. I could’ve gotten plenty at Jackson’s.”
“Whatever.” Taehyung rolled his eyes. “You know how much play she’s gonna get there? And you’re gonna have to watch it alllll.”
“Yeah man. You’re gonna have to watch all sorts of dudes kissing up on her and shit. You’re gonna look like a bitch.” Jimin added.
“Exactly. So let us help you bro.” Taehyung smiled. “Come on it’ll be worth it. Plus, you look great man. She’ll be unblocking you in no time.”
Jungkook and the boys got in the car full of women, instantly leeching onto them.
“Hello ladies” Jimin greeted, buckling up.
“Hiii Jiminnn” They replied in union, almost fighting to talk to him.
One of them turned to Jungkook, immediately biting her lip. “Hey Kookie.”
“Hey Oliver.” He exhaled.
“It’s Olivia” She laughed. “You’re like— so funny!” Her annoying voice rang in his ears.
“Oh— my bad.”
The girls had tried talking Jungkook the entire ride there, trying to get him to open up and talk to them.
“Ouuu look at his phone.” One of the girls motioned.
“Omg look!” One was quick to snatch his phone, “He added Y/n on Snapchat, let’s send her something!”
“You guys should!” Taehyung added.
“No one needs to do that!” Jungkook tried to take it back but they already snapped pictures and sent them to Y/n on his phone.
Olivia passed the phone to Taehyung who kept repeating ‘give it to me’
“Taehyung what the hell!”
“It’s for your own good!” Taehyung held onto his phone for the rest of the ride there.
༊—
“Yep. I’m definitely gonna get sloppy drunk.” Seungyeon announced as they walked inside Jackson’s party.
“There’s no way you won’t. This shits fucking cool.” Elkie looked around the home.

People everywhere and the music was booming in all corners. Girls dancing damn near naked on tables and guys dancing around with empty shot glasses.
“Oh my gosh they’re here!” One of the guys accidentally said a bit too loud, making some heads turn towards the girls.
“Seungyeon come dance with us!”
“Y/n come on we already have shots for you!”
“Elkie come get on the table with us!”
Multiple people were trying to holler at them in attempt to get their attention.
“Yeah it’ll be hard to stay sober tonight.” Elkie laughed.
“Uh huh. And when Taehyung gets here I’m dipping.” Seungyeon giggled.
“You’re still fucking with him?!” Both girls snapped their heads.
“Y’all don’t get it! He is soooo fine whenever he talks to me I just wanna do whatever the hell he wants.” Seungyeon swooned.
“She can’t be serious.” Elkie looked at you. “So let me get this straight. You’re fucking on Taehyung and you’re fucking on Jungkook. Should I just dance with Jimin tonight? Since we’re the three musketeers all of a sudden.”
“Okay Jungkook was an accident!” You defended. “You wanted weed didn’t you!”
“Cut the crap! It was one time” Elkie shook her head. “I can’t believe you two.”
“Whatever.” Seungyeon rolled her eyes. “You should go with me when I go talk to Taehyung. Omg! We can all hang out tonight!”
“Uh, did you forget we’re not on the best terms?” You interrupted her fantasy.
“You never are. Get over it.” Seungyeon rolled her eyes. “Elkie pleaseeee.”
“I can’t believe you.” Elkie kept shaking her head. “You guys are sick.”
“Who’s sick?” A voice interrupted them. “I don’t need any illness spreading around at my party.”
“Omg Jackson!” Seungyeon gasped.
“Hey ladies. Hey Y/n.” He gave you a side hug. “I knew you guys would come showing out.”
“Always. You know us.” Elkie giggled.
Jackson knew the girls very well. They’ve been around since his early party days, helping him promote and build up his status for the parties.
You always went above and beyond for him, offering to even financially support the parties during the time.
Now Jackson was so rich his party budget skyrocketed. All because of those girls he was able to be where he was now. He was more than grateful.
“I know. I shouldn’t have expected any less.” He chuckled, “I’ll tell the security upstairs about yall so don’t sweat anything okay?”
“You got new security?” You questioned him.
“Fuck yeah I did. Last party the security was too drunk to even do their fucking job. I was pissed.” Jackson shook his head.
“Everything’s all good now though,” He continued. “Gotta nice new set up and it’ll do y’all real good. I promise you won’t be disappointed. You ladies have fun, okay?”
“Thank you Jackson.” The three girls bid their goodbyes. They didn’t expect to speak to him for long, especially since he was running a huge party.
“Let’s hang out down here for a bit and then make our way up yeah?” You suggested, earning a nod from the girls.
“Unless it’s too hard for Seungyeon to keep herself away from Taehyungie” Elkie teased her.
“Oh my gosh I hate you.” Seungyeon groaned.
“Speaking of Taehyungie,” You eyes behind her. “Here comes the man of the hour now.”
“With a shit ton of girls at that.”
Seungyeon snapped her head his way. “Oh my gosh.”
“Don’t look!” Elkie turned her attention. “Act unbothered. You can’t let him know you care. Like Y/n when Jungkook calls!”
“Yeah— Okay whatever.” You rolled your eyes. “But she’s right. He’s with hella girls. He’s not thinking about you right now. You can’t act like you’re waiting for him.”
“Look at you miss love expert.” Elkie teased you. “Let’s get you drinking Seungyeon.”
“Yes! Let’s drink! Finally.” You clapped your hands.
The girls walked off to the bar, plenty of people wanting to take shots with them.
The girls played a few drinking games and partied on tables just like the girls before you.
It would be a lie to say Jungkook’s eyes weren’t locked on you.
It was just him, Taehyung, and Jungkook in their own little section, a few guys coming up to talk to them here and there.
“Oh my gosh I hate you guys.” Jimin groaned. “Taehyung you can’t do this to me too.”
“She’s so bad Jimin. I’m almost as bad as Jeon.” Taehyung stared down Seungyeon.
“I thought you wanted to drown yourself in pussy! You were hyping me and Jungkook up earlier!”
“I’m a big fat liar okay!” Taehyung folded.
Seungyeon and you were both dancing on tables, lost in your own little world with drinks in your hands.
Jungkook hadn’t said anything in a minute. Simply staring.
Damn did you show out.
He watched as many guys threw themselves at you, begging you to come down so they could have a piece.
What could he expect? You were a beautiful woman blessed with a body others would pay millions for. You could actually dance and you had looks that could kill.
You were a heavily desirable woman. Especially at a party like this where everyone knew of you.
He knew you weren’t gonna go home with any of these guys. None of them stood a chance.
He didn’t understand how he had one if he was honest.
The way you two started— having intercourse was wild and random. Just a random string of flirty led to you giving it up for him.
Goddamnit he missed you. It was a petty argument like usual. Him getting blocked just to get unblocked in the morning.
This time bothered him more than the others. Especially seeing you like this.
“Shoutout to these lovely ladies right here!” Jackson suddenly announced, all three girls surrounding him.
“My day ones right here” He said proudly.
Jackson wrapped his arm around your waist, pecking your cheek.
Interesting.
Jungkook hadn’t realized you two had become so close.
Was he the reason Jungkook wasn’t unblocked yet?
“Especially Ms. Y/n here. Shit would not be possible without her.” He spoke, making everyone cheer. “Everyone treat them well tonight alright?”
Elkie and Seungyeon cheered before Jackson walked off, finishing his announcement.
Why would it not be possible without you?
None of it made sense to Jungkook.
He downed a shot, hissing at the aftermath. It made Jimin look over.
“Someone’s mad.”
“Shut up.” Jungkook huffed. “I have no reason to be.”
The girls were laughing together and drinking a bit more.
Seungyeon kept stealing glances at Taehyung.
“Oh my gosh. She’s going insane.” Elkie pointed out Seungyeon’s constant tabs on Taehyung.
“Alright we’re going upstairs.” You motioned both girls to follow you to the next story.
“Jimin we have to follow them.” Taehyung watched as they left to go upstairs.
The man rolled his eyes.
Jungkook looked over, seeing Jackson look over that way too.
“Yeah.” Jungkook opened up his mouth. “Let’s go.”
The boys shortly followed them, heading upstairs.
This level was just as intense as the first floor. The only difference was that these people smoked a bit more than they drank.
“So many bad bitches in here.” Jimin looked around. “Nice move Tae.”
“Man who cares? Where the hell is she?” Taehyung looked over.
“Goddamnit.” Jimin cursed, forced to walk over to your friend group with Taehyung.
Jungkook wasn’t too thrilled either. Especially because he didn’t know how you were going to be like.
“Hey Seungyeon.” Taehyung approached her, making her instantly turn her head.
Poor girl had been waiting for that man to talk to her all night.
“Oh. Hey.” She kept it short, just like you and Elkie told her to.
“Let me get you and your girl friends some more drinks yeah?” He offered, making it harder to fight and say no.
“Please.” She caved in, making everyone follow them to the bar.
“Fucking great.” Jimin mumbled.

It was awkward as hell. Two odd couples and two random friends all forced to hang out together.
All because of Seungyeon and Taehyung.
Taehyung got all of them drinks like he said, everyone drinking together to ease up a bit.
Taehyung and Seungyeon were lost in their own conversation.
They were so corny it was making everyone extremely nauseous.
“Are you proud of her?” Jimin shook his head, speaking to Elkie. “Your friend single-handedly ruined my friend group.”
“My friend? Your boy here started it all.” She argued.
“Like hell he did. She took advantage of him.” He told her.
She laughed. “Who’s the one who’s supposed to just drop the shit off and go?”
“You can’t blame a man for just tryna get some.” Jimin shrugged. “Not his fault.”
“You’re delusional.” Elkie rolled her eyes.
“I like how you speak to me. You wanna go make out?”
“Sure.” Elkie shrugged, walking off with Jimin.
You’ve got to be kidding me.
You were alone with Jungkook.
“So,” You began to speak. “Which girl in the car was your favorite?”
“Is that seriously how you’re gonna start this?” Jungkook stared you down.
“Hell yeah.” You chuckled. “You’re a fucking prick. You’re childish and you’re just down right stupid. Sending me some photo of some bitches. Made you feel so good being with other girls huh?”
Started off strong already.
“You know what, it did. They didn’t have a fucking loud mouth like you do. Didn’t have to hear a bunch of bullshit every two seconds.”
“See this is exactly why you’re blocked.” You scoffed. “You’re a dick.”
“You block me all the time mama.” He shrugged nonchalantly. “Doesn’t mean shit.”
“Probably doesn’t mean anything because you’re too busy with all those other bitches.”
“Me? I’m not the one fucking the party host.” He argued back.
Your eyes widened at the accusation. “Oh wow.”
You weren’t going to deny it.
It wasn’t true. You never slept with Jackson.
But Jungkook thinking that you did was enough to satisfy you.
“We’ll come back to that.” Jungkook poked the inside of his mouth with his tongue.
He was obviously very irritated.
“You’re always so angry.” You groaned.
“Because you just manage to strike that one nerve.” He shook his head.
“You’re so aggressive all the time baby.” You eased him. “Let’s drink some more. Please?”
He shook his head. “Trying to sober up. Someone needs to take you home.”
“I can Uber back.”
“By yourself?” He scoffed. “Fuck no. Your friends are long gone and most likely gonna end up going home with Jimin and Tae. Who can’t drive.”
He wasn’t wrong.
Elkie and Seungyeon were going to town on them. The couples were drunken messes.
You agreed, continuing to drink. You two talked for a bit, somewhat civilly.
The both of you couldn’t help but check each other out.
For you, that alcohol came in through your mouth and went straight to your pussy.
Jungkook’s going straight to his dick. Probably why you two always had sex whenever you hung out.
“Let’s go to Jimin’s car.” Jungkook mumbled lowly to you, making you nod.
Jungkook lets out a low whistle as you walk next to him. He couldn't help but stare at your body.
You were so fucking beautiful, he thought to himself.
The car was a bit far from the entrance. The lot was big so the parking was a bit inconvenient.
However, it was hidden well enough.
He opened the backseat car door for you, waiting for you to get in.
You could sense he was still irritated with you. It was written all over his face and you could sense it in his body language.
His anger and irritation had the opposite effect on you, making your pussy wetter than it already was.
Jungkook started the car, letting out a heavy sigh as he pulled out of the parking lot.
He glanced over at you, his eyes scanning over your body. "You know, you make me so fucking angry sometimes..." He growled, his hand reaching over to grab your thigh.
“It’s not my fault. You started it this time.” You shook your head.
"I didn't start shit," Jungkook retorted, his eyes narrowing at you. "You did. You always fucking do."
He couldn't help but get more and more irritated with you.
The idea of you and Jackson weighed heavy on him.
You were fucking Jungkook for weed. Were you fucking Jackson for drinks and party invites?
“You did last night. That’s exactly why I blocked your ass. Always running your mouth.”
Jungkook's fingers tightened around the steering wheel. He couldn't believe you just said that. "You didn't have to block me. You’re so fucking dramatic."
He snapped at you, his anger getting the best of him. "I fucking hate you sometimes."
“Fine. Just drop me off right here then.” You replied, just as irritated with him now. “I’ll fucking walk home.”
“You're not fucking walking anywhere. I'll take you home." He gritted his teeth.
“Whatever. Just drive me home and you can just get rid of me after. Since that’s what you want so bad.” You folded your arms.
He couldn't believe how much of a stubborn girl you were, but he still couldn't help feeling attracted to you. Even when you were like this. "Why are you so fucking difficult?"
He glared at you for a moment before turning his attention back to the road.
“I’m not even doing anything.” You grabbed your purse once he pulled up to your place.
It was natural for Jungkook to let himself in. He did so again, despite their arguing.
“I thought you would approach me at the party to apologize. But no, you’re just arguing with me because you’re jealous of some guy!” You huffed.
Jungkook scoffed at your words. "Jealous? Fuck no. I just don't like seeing you with other guys, that's it."
“Yeah whatever.” You rolled your eyes, “You’re annoying. Your stupid pride won’t let you just admit it.”
You lifted up the couch cushion, a small bag of pre rolls packed away.
“You know what? Fine. I was jealous when I saw you with Jackson. Are you happy now? I fucking admitted it.
“Gonna fucking smoke with me or what?” She looked at him, ignoring him. “Got your two favorite things right here. Weed and arguing.”
He ignored her, grabbing his own preroll and lighting it up with her lighter.
“That’s all you’re gonna say?” He scoffed.
“Do you want a fucking cookie? Congrats, you actually told me the truth for once.” She took a few hits. “So you were jealous”
“Yeah, I fucking was. I don't like seeing you with other guys Y/n. It makes me want to rip their fucking heads off." He chuckled and shook his head. "Especially him.”
“Isn’t Jackson your homeboy?”
“Exactly. Why the fuck would I want to be fucking on the same girl as my bro? That makes me look like a fucking loser.” He glared at you.
“We were just catching up. We’ve known each other for mad long.” You defended.
Jungkook couldn't help but stare at you as you took a hit from the roll. He felt a surge of jealousy, but he tried to push it down.
"Just fucking catchin' up huh? With his bitch ass?" He chuckled and shook his head. "I know what kinda guy he is.”
“I know you’re not talking. Tell me, Jungkook. How many girls do you sell to that don’t pay cash? Too busy selling with their bodies.” She looked at him.
“Yeah? You’re gonna fucking start this shit again?” He chuckled, anger written all over his face. “I’ve told you the same shit over and over Y/n. I’m not fucking anyone else but you.”
“Car full of sleezy bitches all climbing on you? Yeah okay. Find that fucking hard to believe.
Jungkook understands your skepticism. Especially with the type of guys he hung around.
“Tell me this Jungkook.” You began, “How come it’s an issue when I’m with Jackson but when you’re with all these other girls I’m just supposed to believe you.”
Jungkook leaned in, his expression more serious now. He muttered. “I don’t want to do you like that.”
"I just get fucking pissed when I see other guys trying to fuck what's mine." He cocked his eyebrow.
“You’re annoying.”
Jungkook's gaze never left yours face as you rolled your eyes. He could tell you were irritated with him, but he didn't back down.
"I'm annoying cause I don't like seeing other guys around my girl?" He raised an eyebrow.
“Don’t like all these fucking guys tryna hop on you.” His eyes darkened as he stared down at you.
“I get it.” She sighed.
“Mm I don’t think you do.” He shook his head.
Jungkook turned you around, pushing you against the couch. "Fuck you piss me off. You’re just so fucking sexy" He growled, pinning your hands above your head.
"You're gonna let me fuck you like this?” He looked at you. “Because I’m fucking angry. And I’m not sure I’ll be able to give you that slow and lovey shit right now.”
You simply nodded. You swallowed hard, knowing exactly what was going to happen.
Weed made you horny.
Alcohol made you horny.
And you were definitely cross faded.
“Fucking open your mouth.” He moved his hand, now slapping you across your cheek.
It wasn’t enough to really hurt, but enough to leave a sting.
He seen your facial expression change. “No way. You actually like that shit?”
You two always had rough and angry sex. With the amount of times you two pissed each other off, it was like second nature.
This time was different. Jungkook was livid.
“I do.” You swallowed. “N-No condom tonight please.”
This was the first time ever. You never thought those words would ever leave your lips.
You needed it bad tonight. Real bad.
“Oh wow.” He laughed sarcastically. “You’re that sick? You get onto me every fucking day for asking to hit it raw. Now you want to?”
He almost couldn’t believe it. “Letting me toss you around like a fucking ragdoll. He fucking teach you about that shit?”
“N-No Jungkook.”
He slapped you once again. “Don’t fucking lie to me.”
“I promise. He didn’t.” You pleaded.
Jungkook let out a deep breath, knowing you submitted to him.
He moved his hand to your neck, squeezing enough for you to feel.
“Fucking embarrassing me.” He slid his pants down. “Got all my fucking friends talking about you. That what you wanted?”
“N-No.” You swallowed.
He slipped your skirt up, sliding your panties to the side.
He forcefully pushed himself inside, giving you not a single warning. “You let him fuck you raw did you?”
Staying still for a moment, knowing he would soon start fucking you with all the frustration he had in him.
“N-No I didn’t Jungkook.” You honestly replied.
“Not my fucking name.” He warned.
“You clearly wanted his attention Y/n. You think I ain’t notice that shit today?” His grip on your neck got slightly tighter.
“Changed your hair. Spending money to look good for him. Didn’t look in my fucking direction once. Get some new dick and you forget what you already have? Forgot about daddy’s dick?” He scoffed.
Jungkook's thrusts became more powerful, as he let out all the anger and jealousy he felt towards Jackson.
“T-That’s not what I—“
Jungkook's grip tightened on your hips, as he started thrusting. "Shut the fuck up Y/n." He grumbled, as he started pounding harder.
He smacked your ass, leaving a red mark. "Didn’t think you’d be this fuckin’ tight. Figured he stretched this pussy out.”
“H-He didn’t”
“You really have the fucking guys to speak to me right now?” He slapped her.
“Mmph— sorry daddy”
Jungkook grinned, hearing the slight tremble in your voice.
You couldn’t help but be turned on by how angry he was. How degrading he spoke to you.
Him expressing how jealous he was of Jackson definitely did a number on you.
"This.. is all yours, Y/n. It always has been." He slapped your face. "Don't.. you dare fuckin' look at him again. Don’t you fuckin’
dare question if I’m with other bitches or not.”
“Won’t— promise Daddy” She apologized.
Jungkook's expression changed to an angered confusion, as you apologized. "Sorry? You think.. You fuckin' deserve my mercy?"
He hissed as he stopped thrusting, grabbed you and forced you on all four. "I'll show you fuckin' sorry."
“You're mine to fuck. Mine to spoil. Mine to hug. Mine to love.” He grabbed your hair and pulled it back, as he started thrusting hard again. "And you just fucking gave that away?”
“No I— Daddy no I didn’t.” You whimpered.
Jungkook's thrusts became more violent as his anger continued to fuckin boil. "You.. You fuckin' slut," He growled and smacked your ass hard once again.
“D-Didn’t fuck him.” You confessed, swallowing. “N-Never fucked him.”
Jungkook stopped thrusting, his expression was furious, he looked at you with pure shock.
"You didn't fuck him?" He repeated between gritted teeth, not entirely sure if he should believe you or not. “Are you serious?”
“N-Never fucked him.” She hit her lip.
“So you lied?” His voice was low.
“I just never denied anything you said.” She confessed, a bit ashamed now that she was confessing out loud.
"Wow Y/n." He murmured lowly, making a pause in his thrusts, as he looked at you with confusion and shock. "And you made me do all this.”
“I-“ She felt her stomach drop.
Jungkook scoffed and shook his head in disbelief. He was still holding you by the throat, a little tighter now as his cock started to thrust intensely again. "Yeah, you did.”
Jungkook grunted, his thrusts became louder and more intense, holding you tighter. "You're a fucking slut.."
He whispered in a low voice, his hand starting to squeeze around your throat. He pulled himself out a bit to slap your face.
“Pulled all that just for some dick? Seriously Y/n?” He grunted into your ear.
“So sorry Daddy” She apologized softly, the sensual nickname slipping from her lips.
Upon hearing you call him "Daddy" his thrusts became more intense. Hearing it made him weak everytime.
A low growl sounded out from his throat again as your body was pushed back onto the bed with each thrust deeper into you.
He snickered, his hand reaching down to slap your ass cheek, hard. "You're a fucking whore.." He moans, his thrusts are so hard that he's smacking against your body. He leaned in to bite your neck.
“Finally got the dick you wanted? I can’t fucking believe you pulled that shit.” He grunted, utterly shocked. “Can’t fucking believe you did that.”
His thrusts became even more forceful, each hard smack against your ass echoing around you.
He moans as he bites into your shoulder, teeth grinding into your skin angrily. "Why'd you fucking lie to me?" He growls into your ear.
“Wanted you— Wanted your attention.” She whimpered. “Wanted to see how you felt.”
“Yeah? That’s how you fuckin’ wanted me to confess?” He roars out angrily, his grip tightening almost painfully.
“I-It worked…” She boldly whispered.
His glare is fire as he grabs your throat, pulling you back to look into your eyes.
"You like it when I get tell you how I feel? You fuckin’ like it?” He growls out, squeezing your throat tighter for a moment before letting go.
“I liked it Daddy” She bit her lip.
His jaw almost cracks from the intensity of his teeth grinding as he hears your response.
He begins to fuck you harder, losing his anger and going into a frenzy. "You’re so fucking lucky I love to abuse this pussy.”
“Shit feels so fuckin’ good Daddy— Fuck” She cursed repeatedly.
A low groan rips from his throat, feeling your walls squeezing around him at your curse. He liked when you talked dirty. “So fucking pretty like this.”
“Lying about other dudes is different for you baby..” He huffed. “You love this dick huh baby? Tell me.”
“Yes Daddy— I fuckin’ do.” You nodded quickly.
He leans back down, biting at your bottom lip and nodding.
"That's right, you love this dick, mama. Fucking take it then." He spoke lowly, encouraging you to get more vocal and naughty while he pounds into you.
“Feels so much fucking better raw.” She rolled her eyes back. “Should’ve fucking let you months ago.”
He lets out a growl, feeling how tight your walls are on him with no condom. He nods, agreeing and liking the feeling of you raw.
"That's right mama. You ain’t believe me when I said you were the only one. Should’ve been let me hit it raw.” He chuckled. “Gonna fuck you so good now though."
He's on the brink of losing it, he knows he's about to cum soon.
He looks down at you who’s absolutely fucked dumb on his cock.
He curses, slowing down just a tad. "You fucking loving that we're doing it raw now?”
“Feels so much fucking better now. W-Want you to cum inside too.” You begged, making his eyes widened.
“Are you serious?”
“W-Want it so bad I— Please.”
He groans, loving the idea at your request. “Pretty girl gonna let me cum inside, I couldn’t ask for more.”
He speeds up a little bit, slamming into you roughly and grunting. "That's right, fucking want my cum? Wanna turn mama into more than just a nickname huh?”
He dirty talked her so good.
“Mm yes Daddy yes.” She swallowed.
His eyes grow wide at the idea but he smirks while he continues to thrust into you hard, making a dirty scene in his head.
"That's right, I wanna fill your womb up with my kids, make them from your tight fucking pussy, don't fight it mama. So close” He mumbled in her ear.
“Shit I’m close too.”
He knows he's close too, groaning almost in pain from not cumming yet. He continues to fuck you relentlessly as you near the edge.
"Shit! Cum on my cock mama, you need to cum, you want to cum so bad don't you?"
“Cumming fuck” She immediately let go of the feeling building up in her stomach.
He's right on the edge with you, his cock swells up before he pulls out and shoots his hot load to the side of your stomach, he's not ready for kids, at least not yet.
He slumps backwards and curses. "Fucking shit.”
The two were panting on the couch, struggling to catch their breaths.
She panted. “I’m sorry for lying Jungkook. It was wrong of me to lie to you.”
He smirks and shakes his head but still looks at you with an amused expression.
"No need to apologize momma, we're fucking both dirty. Besides we both liked it didn't we?" He winks and wraps an arm around you.
“You’re really not mad?”
“I mean it irritated me a lot when I thought you fucked him.” He sighed. “I’m just relieved now.”
“When I told you I haven’t been with anyone else I meant it.” You told him. “That’s not
something I would lie about. Especially after I pressed you for so long.”
“I know. When I seen him touch you like that I just— I thought I lost you.” He looked at you. “I just kinda thought you were using me.”
“It’s not about weed for me anymore Jungkook.” You swallowed. “It hasn’t been for a while.”
“It was never about the weed for me.” He confessed. “I just wanted to see you since the beginning.”
“You thought that was a secret?” You couldn’t help but snort.
“Okay I’m never being vulnerable with you again.” He shook his head.
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tunafruitt · 8 months
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--> ||❝ The Creator has a.. LOVER?! ❞
SAGAU || Warnings: fluff, gender neutral reader, slight crack, reader gets called a test subject and is implied to be used as one [Dottore’s part] OOC w/ Dottore..? Idk I haven’t finished sumeru yet </3
[ The people of Teyvat find out their grace has been romantically involved with someone for a while now.. what do they think about it? ]
Character(s): DOTTORE, XIAO
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-> [ DOTTORE ]
“The Doctor is the Creator’s suitor? As in… the Second of the Eleven Fatui Harbingers? Are you sure that’s him? You are? Oh.. is— Is Your Grace feeling okay? I don’t see why anyone would be willingly involved with the Fatui Harbingers. What?! No! I’m not saying that’s not okay. Your Grace can do whatever they want! Hmph..”
The people of Teyvat felt conflicted to say the least. They weren’t judging your ability to make choices! They really weren’t… they just thought that there were better choices out there for Their Grace!! Yeah, everyone knew you liked the harbingers even before you descended, but couldn’t you have chosen a less deranged harbinger? For example… uhm... none of them.
Dottore could really care less what everyone else thought of his relationship with you though. He got the full package! His lover was the All Mighty Creator, and now he has a new “test subject”! (he says it affectionately.) Dottore knows people hate him even more than before, but who’s the one with the Creator’s arms wrapped around them, head over heels? This benefits him in so many ways. Wether it be research, obtaining materials, or just being able to have something more to use against the rest of the harbingers.
No one would ever dare voice the opinions they have of him while you’re in the vicinity. They’ll listen to you talk about a “date” you had with Dottore, which was really just you and him in his lab…. and he’s using you to help with his research. Hearing this, the rest of the allogene’s eyes are twitching, their fists are clenched, they’re FURIOUS. Not at you! Never. They’re mad at Dottore. How dare he use you as a test subject?! (you volunteered) How dare he use you to try to make another god?! (you thought that sounded fun) How dare he be IN LOVE with the All Mighty Creator?! (you fell first.)
When the two of you are seen in public, the streets go QUIET. Dottore carries this eerie aura with him, everyone knows who he is. And adding to the fact he’s a harbinger, he is also now recognized as the Creator’s suitor. Everyone besides you feels the silence and the stares, including Dottore, but if his lover is happy does it really matter? <3
In conclusion, everyone hopes Dottore dies. It’s not that they don’t want to see you happy. In fact, the entirety of Teyvat is glad you’re experiencing love and joy, just not with HIM.
─ִ━━ ꯭  ───ׂ─ִ─  ͜͡✿͜͡  ─ִ──ׂ──  ꯭  ━━ִ─
You spend a lot of days in Dottore’s lab. Today was one of those days.
You were conversing with one of Dottore’s younger clones. The clones, while being segments of Dottore, have their own distinct personalities. The one thing they hold in common is the love they have for you.
You love talking to the clones and giving them breaks from whatever days-long tasks Dottore gives them, but you miss the Dottore who’s the last thing you see before you fall asleep and after you wake up. You haven’t seen him since yesterday! Is this really how your boyfriend treats his lover…. who also happens to be the Creator???
And so you decide to go look for him. Who would’ve guessed he was sitting where he always was; his desk. Once you’ve spotted him, as payback for leaving you alone, you decide to sneak up on him. You try your hardest to silence your steps as much as possible in this hollow and echoey office of his.
“I can hear you, Y/N.”
“No you can’t... C’mon Dottore! Cut me some slack. I haven’t seen you since yesterday… and you didn’t even come to say good morning to me today!”
“Good morning.”
“It’s 4:00 PM, love. Take a break. It’s not like I’ll die anytime soon… can I even die..? Uhm.. that’s besides the point. You can conduct your experiments on me and do you research later. Come entertain me, please?”
“Are you asking because I have a choice?”
Your silence gives him an answer. You pull him up from his chair by grabbing his hands and pull him into a hug. You lean in closer to peck his cheek. He leans into you and grabs you by the waist to pull you closer—
“Doctor, the segments have finished—“
“Oh.”
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-> [ XIAO ]
“Oh! One of the adepti? THE VIGILANT YAKSHA?! S-sorry that caught me by surprise… So the Yaksha is dating the Creator, huh. His tales have been documented for millennia’s, yet he’s rarely seen in public… I guess even someone like that can’t help but fall for Our Grace.”
So that must be why you always cooked Almond Tofu… Well, since Xiao IS the Conqueror of Demons, I can see the people of Liyue being quite happy. Jealous? Yes. But who’s even more jealous? Mondstadt. Why couldn’t it be one of the Knights of Favonious or something? But they guess you’re happy and that’s enough… (Though it could’ve been with them.)
Xiao is seen a little more often with you now that it’s confirmed you two are dating. Not too often, but if you want to go try out a restaurant in the city of Liyue, he’ll never say no. He may not speak much, but according to rumors is Liyue… “his eyes are always on you, listening to anything and everything the Creator has to say. It’s clear he’s fallen completely in love!” (Said by Chef Mao, probably.)
Being Xiao’s partner may seem awkward from an outsiders perspective, but he’s surprisingly sweet! He still won’t talk much, but he’ll reply to any questions you have, no matter how stupid or obvious they are with full genuity. Him being the Conqueror of Demons and you being the Creator, you both live busy lives…. so his eyes literally light up when you two are both able to finally see each other after a long time. <3 (he’s head over heels guys help.)
The adepti would be so PROUD. They probably already knew you and Xiao had a little something going on even before it was announced because of the way Xiao seemed slightly more happy. This lead to then being suspicious and eventually seeing him and you together… doing the most intimate thing ever…..
…. HOLDING HANDS. UNDER THE MOONLIGHT. But they kept quiet so don’t worry!
─ִ━━ ꯭  ───ׂ─ִ─  ͜͡✿͜͡  ─ִ──ׂ──  ꯭  ━━ִ─
“Xiao! I found you.”
As per usual, Xiao was sitting on the roof of Wangshu Inn. Today was one of the days where both of you were busy. You had a meeting to attend, and he was doing his job as The Conqueror of Demons. It was night by the time you were able to see each other.
“You should’ve called my name, Your Grace. It would’ve been easier for me to find you.”
“Yeah but I like looking for you. I always know where you are since you’re in the same spots anyway. And besides, I like how Wangshu Inn looks at night!”
You always thought Xiao looked pretty, but he looked especially pretty under the moonlight. His face seemed to glow more than usual today. Maybe it was the warm colored light radiating from inside of Wangshu Inn, or the light reflected by the moon shining down on him. Maybe it was the fact he had missed you so much that seeing your face again brought him a feeling he hadn’t felt in a long time.
“Your Grace?”
“Oh, sorry Xiao, I lost my train of thought. Let’s go eat! I’m feeling hungry… today’s meeting was waaayy too long… C’mon, I’ll buy you something!”
“No need. I’ll be okay with just accompanying Your Grace.”
“Agh, stop calling me that. Y/N? Can you say Y/N? Please Xiao?”
“… Y-Y/N..”
“See? Not too hard right? Ok let’s go eat! I’ll make you Almond Tofu how you like it.”
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FINALLY DONE OOHMYGODDD sorry this took so long. Idk what I should do next so feel free to request anything… ANYWAYS THE FIRST PART OF THIS GOT ALMOST 700 NOTES??? omg stop guys I’m giggling and blushing aughshsgghh. But seriously thank you so much I’m bawling
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starcandybby · 1 month
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8:15 a.m. - haechan x fem!reader
warnings: reader has she/her pronouns, haechan is in love, fluff , dreamies scold and annoy haechan, might be typos.
minors pls dni ♡
‧₊˚ ✩°。⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆。°✩˚₊‧‧₊˚ ✩°。⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆。°✩˚₊‧
The practice room doors burst open as Donghyuck swiftly walks into the space.
“Lee Donghyuck!” Renjun was the first to scold him, barely giving Donghyuck the time to set his stuff down.
“I’m late, I know I know.” Donghyuck had mentally prepared himself for the lecture he knew he’d get when he arrived at practice late…again.
“This is the third time you’ve been late in the last month, Hyuck.” This time, Mark’s voice addresses Donghyuck, uncharacteristically serious for the leader.
“I know, I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.” Donghyuck sits up straight and playfully salutes his leader, hoping to ease some of the tension in the room.
“What made you late anyway?”
Donghyuck internally sighs at Jisung’s question; he was hoping that they could all just forget about his tardiness and get to practicing….which was supposed to start 15 minutes ago.
“I was just..you know…” Donghyuck was struggling to come up with an excuse that was both vague and believable to the members that know him so well.
But before he could even complete his sentence, Chenle cuts him off.
“You were with her, weren’t you?” Chenle shouts and points an accusatory finger in Donghyuck’s direction.
The mere mention of you brings a smile to his face. Donghyuck doesn’t say anything, but the tilt of his head downward, to avoid eye contact, and the smirk on his face, tells his members all they need to know.
Groans and murmurs of frustration can be heard around the practice room once the rest of Dream realizes the reason their beloved member was late.
“Man! I knew it!”
“Our Haechannie is in loveee!”
Donghyuck rolls his eyes, but his annoyed demeanor quickly dissolves as a bashful smile eventually makes a way on his face amidst the teasing.
“Yeah Yeah. Get it all out now.”
A few more teasing comments and Dream finally gets to practicing…only 20 minutes later than planned.
Hours and hours later, Donghyuck anxiously taps his foot as he listens to the choreographer wrap up the practice session. He’s sure the concluding points and improvements are important for him to know, but he can’t draw his attention away from the clock hanging above the mirrors in the practice room.
The sooner they finish up, the sooner he can get home to you-
“Alright, I think that’s all we’ve got for you today. We’ll meet back here tomorrow at the same-“
When the choreographer’s concluding words, Donghyuck jumps up and grabs his stuff, darting out of the practice room.
Mark jumps up to follow him. “Don’t be late tomorrow!” Mark calls after him, but it’s a lost cause, Donghyuck is already too far down the hall to hear his leader.
‧₊˚ ✩°。⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆。°✩˚₊‧‧₊˚ ✩°。⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆。°✩˚₊‧
Earlier that morning - 7:45 a.m.
“Please don’t go.” You nestled further into the crook between Donghyuck’s neck and shoulder. He chuckled and pulled you closer, if that was even possible. His legs tangled with yours, arms draped over your waist. Donghyuck doesn’t think it can get much better than this.
“You know I don’t want to baby.” Donghyuck can’t see your pout, but you know you’re sporting one as soon as he finished speaking. He strokes your back in an effort to comfort you, long fingers scaling your back rhythmically, almost lulling you back to sleep. Donghyuck knows you’re not really mad at him; you’ve long accepted his schedule as an idol. It doesn’t make it any easier for him to leave though.
“When do you have to leave again?” You murmur as you lift your head to look at your boyfriend. Heart eyes are practically popping out of Donghyuck’s head as he looks at you. Sleepiness still very evident on your face, but he loves it. He loves you.
“In a few minutes.” An absolute lie. He was supposed to leave about 10 minutes ago. But, he wasn’t ready to leave you, not yet.
“They’ll be mad if you’re late again.” You murmur again, leaning into Donghyuck’s hand that had come up to cup your face.
“They’ll be okay. They can miss me for the first few minutes of practice.” He reassures you with another lie. This will be the third time he’s late to practice within the month. He’s sure he’ll get reprimanded by both his leader and his captain, and he might even have to have a meet with their managers. In the moment though, Donghyuck doesn’t care about any of that. He’s feeling more like a ‘in the moment guy’ right now anyway.
It isn’t until a few minutes later, at 7:55, that Donghyuck finally rolls out of bed, much to your and his despair. He makes a stop in the bathroom to clean himself up a bit- to at least try to look presentable.
Donghyuck gives you one last kiss on the forehead- you both exchanging sleepy ‘i love yous’. He lingers longer than he should have (like he did all morning). It takes all his willpower to leave you- he wanted nothing more than to stay.
He sighs and heads out your front door. Despite consequences, Donghyuck thinks anything is worth spending more time with you.
‧₊˚ ✩°。⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆。°✩˚₊‧‧₊˚ ✩°。⋆♡ ⋆˙⟡♡ ⋆˙⟡♡⋆。°✩˚₊‧
a/n: Thank you for reading!! I was inspired by nct 127’s walk dance practice, where hyuck comes in late and then RUNS out at the end hehehe also my haechan brain rot is SO bad rn. love that man.
comments and reblogs are always appreciated <3
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the0doreslover · 9 months
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My friend | theo nott
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pairing: theodore nott x fem!reader
warnings: short sorry, fluff, poor baby enzo
summary: this amazing ask right here
"Mr. Berkshire and Miss L/n," Professor Flitwick's voice echoed through the Charms classroom. You halted your quill's progress on your parchment and turned your attention toward the back, where Lorenzo Berkshire sat engaged in conversation with Theodore Nott.
"Good luck," Hermione snickered
"Yeah, thanks, Mione," you sighed, observing Lorenzo, who seemed content to stay put. With a sigh, you gathered your belongings and maneuvered your way over to him.
"Look, she's obedient, Enzo," Theodore laughed, shooting you a sly look.
"Very funny. Let's just get this over with, yeah?" you retorted.
That was three weeks ago. In the time that followed, your friendship with Lorenzo deepened into something unexpected. Together, you not only successfully completed the assigned project, earning an impressive grade, but Lorenzo had also become a helpful study companion for your upcoming potions assignment. His willingness to help and his genuine sweetness had endeared him to you, turning him into more than just a classmate.
As the days turned into weeks, your friendship continued to flourish. Studying together became a ritual, and the laughter you shared transcended the walls of Hogwarts. Yet, amidst this newfound friendship, there was an undercurrent of tension that you couldn't ignore
Theodore Nott's grumpy demeanor. God It was as if he wanted to murder you
He saw you with enzo? his eyes rolled
Enzo wanted you to eat with them? His eyes rolled
You wanted to study with enzo? His eyes rolled
You had made a joke to enzo that one day that his eyes are going to get stuck there, but unfortunately for you he had come to give enzo his study book and heard you, but what did he do? he rolled his eyes.
To be fair to him, you weren’t any better
Enzo had to go practise with theodore? you’d sigh
Enzo wanted theodore to study with you? you’d sigh
Enzo had to go back to his dorm to see theo? you’d sigh
Poor enzo couldn’t keep up with you both, he felt like he was going mad. So what did he do? He went to blaise.
“Wow that’s alot man” blaise nodded before getting a whack from pansy.
“No enzo listen to me, they both just need to get to know each other, the only thing they think they ahve in common is you, so if we remove you maybe they’ll find something they actually like about each other” pansy explained
“Or maybe they just both have serious crushes on each other” draco piped in finally lifting his head from his book.
“go back to your book draco”
Enzo had told you to meet him in his dorm to study, which you found a bit weird but then again, enzos a weird guy. you knocked once but he didn’t answer, so you knocked again a bit louder.
“Finally you took your tim- oh it’s you” theodore nott stood infront of you his eyes raking up and down your body.
you pushed past him “where’s enzo?”
“No you’ve got it wrong princess, i’m hanging out with enzo today” he walked closer to you
“No theodore, he told me to meet him here”
he was just about to say something when you both heard the door latch shut
“You’re not coming out until you become friends, i can’t take this anymore”
“Enzo!” you shouted through the door “Enzo please open the door”
“When you become friends!”
you pressed your ear against the door and heard a few other voices
“enzo this is not what i meant at all”
“how do i get into my room?”
“This is your fault princess” you turned around and saw theodore on his bed watching you
“my fault? maybe if you didn’t make me feel like you’ve hated me this wouldn’t of happened”
Theodore was caught off guard by your response "Maybe if you weren't always stealing Enzo's attention, he could've been here to hang out with me."
His words hung in the air, leaving a palpable tension between you two. You were definitely not expecting such a direct accusation. Theodore, on the other hand, immediately regretted his choice of words as he saw the impact they had on you.
Before you could respond, he sighed and muttered, "I didn't mean it like that."
Fed up, you sighed. “what’s your deal? We can’t keep up like this, for enzo, the poor guy looks like he’s aging for gods sake.”
He hesitated, before choosing to stay silent
Your eyes narrowed. “maybe if you weren’t such a sour git, we wouldn’t be having this conversation.”
Theodore shot you a glare“Maybe if you weren’t always acting like you own the place, we wouldn’t have a problem.”
The argument escalated, each insult flying like sparks from a misfiring spell. The dorm now echoed with your bickering. It was like a full-on wizard duel, but with words instead of wands.
“Merlin’s beard, Theo, can’t you just chill for once?” you snapped.
“Chill? Maybe you should lower your ego!” Theodore shot back.
“me lower my ego! theodore you’re a teenager acting like a toddler
The back-and-forth continued, like a never-ending Quidditch match of insults. But then, in the midst of the verbal chaos, something shifted. There was a moment, a beat where you both just stopped, realizing how ridiculous the argument had become.
Theodore sighed, running a hand through his hair. “This is stupid. Why are we even fighting?”
You rolled your eyes. “Beats me, Theo. Maybe you just enjoy being a prat.”
He smirked, a flicker of amusement in his eyes. “And maybe you just enjoy being a know-it-all.”
For a moment, you both just stood there, the tension dissipating like a deflating balloon. Then, in a twist of events, Theodore did something unexpected. He closed the distance between you, and before you could react, his lips crashed into yours.
It was like a jinx had hit you, leaving you momentarily stunned. The argument was forgotten as he brung you impossibly closer to him
And when he pulled away, there was a smirk on his face. “Well, that shut you up.”
You blinked, still processing what just happened. “What the hell, Theo?”
He chuckled, the tension between you replaced by an awkward sort of understanding. “I figured we needed a different kind of distraction.”
You rolled your eyes, but couldn’t help the small smile that tugged at your lips. “You’re mental, you know that?”
Theodore grinned. “Maybe. But at least we’re not fighting anymore.”
“Hm, i guess your right”
“is it safe to come in now!” enzo shouted wailed
“No enzo she just stabbed me in the gut”
you watched as the door slowly opened and enzo came in along with blaise pansy and draco.
“can i just say that i was right?” draco smirked taking a bite of his apple
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hazelfoureyes · 5 months
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⟢Alastor x Cupid FemReader Tasked with making a demon believe in true love or you can’t return to heaven, things immediately go off the rails when you hurt yourself and Alastor catches one of your most troubling arrows; Mania
˚₊ · »-♡→ Week 1 and Week 2
˚₊ · »-♡→Week 3 and Week 4 smut💦 (keep reading)
Alastor lets you leave the hotel! Together! For soup. Later, your plans to make Alastor lose his obsession backfire. But like, in a hot way so you’re not that mad about it. A+ for effort?
˚₊ · »-♡→Week 5, Week 6, Week 7, and Epilogue smut💦
「warnings/promises: smut, I once again misuse a fucking prayer in a sacrilegious way, soup, spoon feeding, Angel texts, so much cum, bondage, tentacles, just good ole fashion fucking in the radio station, not quite dubcon but Alastor doesn’t really listen, hell has twitter and lets be real it’s just normal twitter, giant Alastor, Horse Luci」
Minors DNI ♥️ 🧹lovingly
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You finally managed to leave the hotel. It was of course with Alastor at your side, microphone pressing into the small of your back like a third arm. It was as if he worried you’d just turn around and run.
He opened every door, pulled out your chair, and when your left hand shook and dropped your food he took on the task of feeding you. It was embarrassing, to say the very least. The sinners in the restaurant staring, a brave few filming or typing furiously on their phones.
You got a buzz on your own cell, a gift from Angel when he realized Alastor wouldn’t let you speak with others alone. 
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He texted a link to a post on some hell site, to a photo of you right then, at that exact moment, being spoon fed by the radio demon. You considered smashing your head into the table until you blacked out. If you got up and left would you make it back to the hotel before someone realized you weren’t a sinner? You were absolutely terrified of someone noticing you as heaven sent.
Heaven kicked? Heaven thrown. Yeah that one felt right.
“You need to eat. You can’t heal like this.” Alastor sounded concerned, but you fought the urge to care. 
He hadn’t apologized to Husk, but Husk did say Alastor seemed to avoid eye contact which was basically a gift to him. Alastor had come to your room to dress you the next day as he always did, neither of you mentioning the day before. The hall was magically pristine by the time you left.
A tiny sliver of you thought he felt embarrassed. But decades of experience told you that Mania didn’t afford embarrassment, the stricken couldn’t be truly manic if something like that was holding them back.
Maybe it had been such a shallow cut he hadn’t gotten the full punch of Mania?
Another attempt to feed yourself, slowly bringing your spoon to your mouth, “You know when I heal I am going to finish my task and leave, right?” 
An odd laugh, a non-existent tear wiped away, “Adorable. No. I promise you, that won’t happen.”
“Alastor.” You put the spoon down with a clink.
“I love when you say my name. May I offer you more reasons to hold it in your mouth?”
“Al-,” you groaned, “I can’t stay forever.”
He hummed, a show of pretending to think about what you said, “Wrong! You can. And I argue, you will.”
You tried again with the spoon, regretting soup. Your appetite had been shot for awhile and it seemed easy enough. Wrong. Again. There was a constant tremble to your hands since arriving. Perhaps experiencing pain for the first time was rattling your body so much that it couldn’t cope. “Why would I ever do that? This is literal hell.”
Alastor leaned over, taking the spoon from you with ease and bringing it to your mouth, “Because I’ll make you understand it’s where you belong. They didn’t appreciate you,” his grin widened, “Not like I do. Like I can, if you’d let me.”
Annoyed and flustered, you took the help to eat. “Thank you.” A spoonful, “How can you say that though? I’m the one and only Cupid.”
“Actually, no. You’re not. You are just the current incarnation. They’ll replace you.” 
You regretted telling him that. They could. Just replace you, that is. There was nothing stopping them. You stared into your soup, lips curling down.
“Don’t look so defeated. I’ll make you happy, for eternity.” 
Your eyes rolled. “When do you plan on starting that eternal happiness?”
You didn’t look at him when you said it, but you could see his hand slow, then become completely still. Had you wounded him?
He pivoted, “Doesn’t Cupid have wings?”
Another spoonful, “Of course.”
Alastor waited while you took a drink, determined to make you eat the entire bowl, “Where are they?”
A pause. Where were they? You hadn’t realized you couldn’t feel them. They weren’t everpresent, but their weight still sat between your shoulder blades at all times. Always. Normally. But now? 
“You don’t know? That’s troubling.” Alastor read your face with ease.
You shot him a look. Stop doing that. Stop replying to unspoken thoughts.
“Apologies.”
Another text before you could snap at him.
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You slid the phone away from Alastor, face red. “Do you think, honestly, if you’re capable of it, that I’ll ever be able to go home?”
His hand came to your neck, running over your collarbone, “For the record, I’ve never once lied to you.” You rolled your eyes, fine, okay, “With your heavenly body, even as weakened as you have been here, I’d say just a few more weeks.”
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You turned the phone face down.
“Good…that’s good. If you plan on winning me over, your countdown has started.” You pushed the soup away, appetite gone. The idea of never returning to heaven made you nauseous. He slid it back to you, face stern despite the smile he wore.
The walk home was quiet, your stomach full of unwanted soup.
No, not home. The hotel. 
He usually spoke a lot, clearly loving the sound of his own voice. His hand replaced the staff, settled on your back as he guided you. You could feel the warmth through your clothes. How could he be so hot and not be sweating? Another sinner thing?
The thought hadn’t left you by the time you came into view of the hotel gates. Maybe you had been replaced. How would you know? Maybe that was why your wings were gone. Surely there was some way to communicate from hell.
You found Lucifer as soon as you returned, unbothered by Alastor’s presence, “I need to speak to heaven.” 
Alastor was saying something but you had gotten quite good at tuning him out. Lucifer snapped back, the men quickly devolving into arguing again.
“Lucifer.” You said it with your chest. 
His apple topped cane whirled, a golden circle appearing with a crystal clear image of heaven’s glowing gates through its center.
A loud noise erupted behind you, a high pitched static wail, familiar tentacles flailed and a long shadow of a growing Alastor stretched across the wall. His back was bent into the lobby ceiling, perhaps three stories tall now.
The sounds of magic popping as Lucifer shapeshifted accented the sounds of horror with that of whimsy. You approached the portal, those black tendrils slithering around your ankles but you easily slipped out of them as their owner's energy was pulled to full demon Lucifer slamming into him.
Almost, you could see it. 
A monstrously large hand came down, shaking the hotel and knocking various objects off their perches in the lobby. Charlie and Vaggie, someone else you’d come to enjoy the company of, flew down the stairs.
The common area was filled with the sounds of yelling and breaking glass. You crawled over his hand as Alastor’s fingers curled around your body gingerly. He tried to pull you from the gateway but while he slowed, Lucifer now a flying horse kicking him in the face, your outstretched hand strained to enter the portal.
Your fingers grazed the doorway, the air around the lobby fizzing and warping as a desperate screech tore from Alastor’s wide and impossibly thin chest. The grip tightened around you. A static whine threatened to pop your eardrums.
As your fingertips pressed past the ring, they stopped. Something impenetrable and unseen between you and heaven. 
Alastor must have noticed it too, his grip loosening as you clamored on hand and knees to the portal. Your palm ran over the doorway, searching for a hole or seam to rip. Just under your skin was your home, bright and clean and painless. A tiny ‘no’ fell from your lips, smacking at the barrier with your open hand.
Alastor returned to his normal, still terrifying, height. Lucifer came forward, their fight losing motivation, his small hand on your shoulder as you sat on the hotel lobby floor. He closed the portal and apologized, “Sorry kid. Let’s try again when you finish that task, okay?”
Alastor’s arms went under your back and knees and lifted you off the ground. You didn’t resist or argue. Your eyes were unfocused, vision blurry with tears, as you were carried past the others. Vaggie looked ashamed, which was odd given she had more character than half the archangels could muster together between them.
There existed permissions for who could enter the heavenly realm, a list meticulously kept. They’d removed you from that roster. They’d locked the doors behind you.
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You felt good. The final week of your first, and hopefully last, month in hell was marked with taking off your sling for the first time.
A good three day wallow in a metaphorical cave helped you emerge with renewed vigor. Of course they locked the gates behind you, otherwise you’d just go home. That made sense. That made sense.
That had to make sense. 
Deciding to take a risk and attempt to expedite your homecoming, you and Angel made plans. Like a teenager in a party movie you snuck out of the hotel when Alastor was asleep. Well, so you assumed. You weren’t really sure what he did behind closed doors.
Angel brought you somewhere he felt people would be receptive to discussing love and talking to angelic beings, and admittedly also very high. 
Sling off but still being as gentle as you could, you leaned across the small standing-only table to talk-shout with a rather cute aquatic demon. An eel? Or maybe some kind of water-fond lizard? It didn’t matter, his glasses were cute, both of you a little drunk,  and you quite good at saying the right things.
And all of the right things were said, and you felt maybe if nothing else you’d enjoy your first demonic lay, when the power shut off.
Everyone filed out, bummed and bothered to find most of the neighborhood shrouded in darkness.
Angel tapped your shoulder and pointed up the hill to the hotel, radio station a glow with a red light, “Ya know, I wouldn’t be surprised.” Nothing to do but to stare, you stayed quiet and angry while he flagged down a taxi knowing the trip would be fast without traffic lights, “Guess Daddy Dead Eyes is calling you back.” 
Anger grew and grew in your chest as you were charioted home.
Jesus, to the hotel. Stop doing that.
You burst into the radio station tower, Alastor barely reacting. Until, that is, you marched up to his desk.
Pinned before you could react, his body pressing into yours as your ass ran up onto the desk.
“Sneaking out like a child?” His voice was low, soft, unnatural. “Why do you intentionally torment me?” 
 “I have done,” you tried to move but only succeeded in rubbing your stomach against his crotch, “no such thing. You’re just possessed.”
He responded by pressing forward, no accident, as his eyes narrowed on you, “Correct. I am a man possessed.” When he rolled himself into you, an alcohol primed groan escaped your mouth. 
“I thought you didn’t care about those things,” your eyes flashed to his lap pushing into you and then back to his glare.
“You’re my exception that proves the rule. If you’re so desperate for attention there’s no need to leave the hotel to find it.” His smile was poisoned by the simmering anger in his eyes, “Dear.”
It was the alcohol and annoyance at losing a chance with glasses-man, Jake or Jark or something not worth a scrabble move, that made you sneer a reply, “Not yours. I am a divine creature, demon. Your body would just filthy me.” Nose up, feeling absolutely better than him in every sense, you pushed him off and left. 
That was easy. Wow. 
Proud of yourself, you made it to the elevator before you realized— illusions. Perhaps his illusion was the idea sex with you was worth the effort, more so than others. He said it himself before, he didn’t care for such things. Perhaps if you could show him it was as boring and unattractive as sex with anyone else could be, maybe you could shatter his mania with disappointment.
You pulled a u-turn and heel-toed right back into his station. Giving him no time to react this time, you climbed onto his chair and straddled him, “On second thought, try your worst. Let’s get it out of your system and move on.” You ground your hips down. He only smiled up at you, amused. Taking his hands you set them on your waist, giving him permission to handle you, “Claim me. Make everyone know I’m yours.” He didn’t move. You were starting to feel embarrassed, had he goaded you just to make you look stupid? He would.  But your kind invented the tension before sex between enemies, “If you can.”
That did it. His hair visibly stood on end, “It is not a matter of ability. It’s about-”
“If you can’t, that’s fine. No need to start lying to me now. But don’t say I never gave you the opportunity.” You smirked, hoping he enjoyed a taste of his own sardonic medicine, and lifted yourself off of him.
His hands came to life on your hips, helping you rise and then flipping you onto your stomach. Your arms pushed radio transmitters and various old timey fuckery away to make room for yourself.
Those talons slipped up the center of your bottoms and crooked into your underwear. Long and strong, his fingers felt you. “Is this a perk of a heavenly body or is this,” two fingers dipped into your already wet and relaxed entrance, “all for me?”
You fought the urge to respond with anything other than malice, “Don’t flatter yourself.”
In heaven no one needs preparation, no one needs lube or required stretching to keep things whole and fun. You would love to say that quality followed you down, but unfortunately, like perfect health and angelic wings, it had not. 
You decided to chalk it up to the alcohol. Always an easy excuse to offer yourself.
Alastor’s hands pulled away and up, finding the place just above the Rosie’s Emporium clothing tag and ripping the bottoms and underwear clean in half.
You bit into your hand to keep your excited shriek to yourself but unfortunately couldn’t stop your legs kicking up. His laugh echoed off the many windows. 
Why couldn’t he be worse at this? Why couldn’t Alastor be clumsy and meek and awkward at sex? No, the menace you’d gotten almost used to was confident and commanding, you felt yourself twitching in anticipation. People have a misconception that Cupid was a chaste and wholly emotional creature, which was false. First of all, Cupids varied based on the incarnation. Just like other heavenly creatures their personality was varied and unpredictable. 
Personally, you weren’t suited for the job. If you were honest. Why couldn’t your quiver just be full of Eros and Agape? Even of those two, sexual love was more your speed. Romance was fine and lovely but perhaps you’d gotten a little jaded. 
Luckily for you, fucking Cupid was something many winners had on their afterlife bucket lists and you rarely found yourself with an empty bed.
Your attention was stolen back, Alastor’s clawed hand grabbing at the flesh of your thighs, “Oops.”
Focus. Why were you doing this again? Your system was metabolizing the alcohol now, and with the air cooling off your exposed sex, everything was awash with lust. Did you want to diminish his mania or were you just horny?
Would it really be so bad to admit you were both?
Deep breath, you remembered. Boring. Banal. The plan was to be motionless and not provide him any satisfying sounds. Don’t touch him, don’t try to push back on him, no tricks or fancy shit. The sooner he was over this you could make someone trust in love and fuck off home. 
Seconds turned to a minute, your ass in the air as Alastor’s hands pawed at your skin. You wanted to ask what the hold up was, but you didn’t want to give away how much you were needing him to just fuck you already.
“Do you miss flying?”
You looked around, were you so drunk you missed an entire chunk of conversation while thinking about how to hide thirsting for his dick?
“Yes…?” True statement.
“Allow me to help with that.”
There was a moment you half expected to be chucked out the window, but almost worse than that, you heard him seat himself in the chair again before your body was picked up and off the desk. “Alastor! I don’t-,” Hands flailing, feet moving around the best they could, you struggled against the familiar tentacles he had command over. “I do not allow it!”
Your hands batted at them fruitlessly. One came under your knees and folded them to either side of your chest before wrapping around your waist twice, a second across your chest like a seatbelt snug and secure. Had you been on the floor you could almost be mistaken for taking a deeply devout praying stance. Only your arms were free to move, the position making you open and incapable of taking back any semblance of control. 
“Alastor!” Stretching, you could almost reach the edge of his work table, but your fingers and toes curled in as you were seated on something hot and stiff. Your lips quivered, desperate to keep silent as you were pulled down onto him. Reaching back your hands found his stomach, raking your nails across the skin in need of anything to grip. 
When you heard him chuckle to himself, you knew you were already losing. Plan backfiring entirely. You pulled your hands back to your center, taking ahold of the tentacle nestled between and across your chest. 
“Heavenly Father,” his voice was quiet but sure, your eyes so wide you worried you’d get stuck making a permanent face of utter shock and despair, “bless us and these thy gifts which we receive from thy bountiful goodness, through your name, our lord.” You were lifted off his lap, Alastor’s swollen tip dragging along your unstretched walls as he said the Lord's prayer, “Amen.” Pulled back down before the second syllable even reached your ears, you cut into your bottom lip as a scream bounced around behind your teeth.
Heathen.
“I would think you of all people knew how to finish a prayer.” Alastor chided, “What will heaven say?”
If heaven knew you were being impaled midair on an overlord’s cock, they’d create a second hell for you to rule. Population of none. Except maybe some horny nuns.
As he found a pace he seemed happy with, slow and long draws out of you, you realized how fucked you were. Looking down, you could see one of his hands was settled at the base of his cock, those long fingers draped down his balls. The other hand was unseen and unfelt. 
“Alastor.” You tried to sound stern.
“Oh I doubt heaven knows my name. Not yet at least.” He sounded unbothered, almost unaffected. “Not until I’ve spirited away their little angel of love.”
You were almost insulted at how easily he could speak despite being buried so far into your wet, hot cunt. Maybe you had been spoiled in heaven, people usually so turned on by the idea of you that they were coming undone as soon as you were wrapped around them or in them in whatever way you decided.  
A broken chant of “be bored, be bored,” in your mind as Alastor hummed, that mystery clawed hand falling at your back. Biting your lip, you tried to think about anything other than how full he was making you. Did the glasses man at the club have a cock as thick as Alastor’s? Would you have been as satisfied as you were now? Every down thrust made the tuft of fur at this base press against your ass. Soft. You wanted to grind against it, the idea pulling a wanton moan out.
Fuck. Failing to distract yourself because you got distracted. It was so hard to think about anything else than your body being pushed open again and again. The blood on your lips was sweet, licking them clean before finding a new spot to bite down on. Quiet.
“Ah, are you giving me the silent treatment?”
Could this son of a bitch read minds? Could sinners read minds?!
 If you didn’t reply, that was confirmation. But if you did reply, you were breaking your goal of not talking.
“Just…,” you took a deep sigh, knowing this was going to be rough, “I’m not really feeling like making any noise.” A shrug, the best you could manage at least while bound and held aloft in the space above his lap. Pretending this was normal and boring was a feat. “I’m not a vocal person during sex. I prefer to just lie there and get serviced. Don’t mind me.”
That sounded awful. Perfect. 
“Oh? Well then, I guess I’ll not worry myself.” You could hear the smile in his voice. Less perfect. He began to hum a little tune as your body, partially upright, was now being tilted forward at a 45 degree angle from his lap. His cock was bending in you, head pressing harshly up into your walls. 
Heart beating so fast you felt a dizzy spell hit you, that renewed anticipation almost as arousing as the sensations.
His humming continued like he was reading the paper. You’d never ridden a roller coaster, but you’d seen many people do it before and this was surely the same feeling; right at the peak before the drop. When the ride operator stills you and lets you stare down at the height before you. Your stomach was flipping, excitement tinged with fear. 
You were pulled off his dick until you felt the bell of his red tip get just outside your entrance. Was he going to pull out entirely?
No. He pulled you down by way of shadows and fucked you just a couple inches into your cunt. His head was dragging out past your tight hole and smashing back in, directly hitting your g-spot. The spongy bundle of nerve endings was dented with every thrust.
You weren’t used to having your entrance stimulated so much, the skin luckily becoming slick as your own wetness was fucked out of you. 
“That feels weird, please.” How quickly you gave up. “Stop pulling out like that.”
A considerate sigh, “But you’ve gotten so wet, my dear. You’re dripping down my thighs already. I don’t think you want me to stop.”
Could you cum like this? You felt like you could, maybe if you just…you quickened your breath, faster and faster. Your stomach heaving, you felt the crescendo of pleasure. 
“On second thought!” He stopped.
Your toes wiggled, hands gripping the tentacle on your chest. Quiet. Shh. Don’t argue. Boring. Don’t care. The building orgasm waned, you felt your blood pressure lower. This really was hell. 
Alastor’s head was just sitting in you, burning hot and throbbing. You were sure you could feel his heartbeat. 
You two were locked in a standoff. Someone had to let on they were enjoying themselves; Alastor releasing pent up frustration with your attitude toward his affections, you chasing down a rare penetration-only orgasm. 
An idea struck you, a way to hopefully antagonize him and bruise his pride enough to force him into your hand (pussy), “Thank God. I think it’s almost my bedtime.”
Alastor’s smile strained, a twitch coming over his left eye. A trap. But the idea of letting you down and off of him seemed far worse than the small defeat you were offering. “Allow me to rock you to sleep then, sweetheart.”
Success! Shit! 
You reached out, the angle of your punishment allowing you to grab the edge of the table and grip. Alastor’s annoyance translated to an inhuman pace, him pulling you off entirely from his cock before bringing you back down. He was positively slipping in and out of you, your lower lips puffy and soaked around him. This degree of wetness was something you couldn’t remember feeling outside of marathon sessions. 
When your hands tightened, a shock of pain tore down your arm, a scream bringing Alastor to a sudden stop. “My collar…” Pain was apparently not a kink you enjoyed, though you briefly wondered if heaven allowed it at all. 
You couldn’t even fuck properly. You couldn’t do anything right. All you managed to do was fail. A sting to your eyes as the air hit your welling tears. Did humans feel this pain often? Your body was righted and turned, you looked down to Alastor’s face as you were brought to him. He looked so soft, usual smirk a sweet toothless smile, “I told you to keep the sling on, didn’t I?” He looked happy.
Your arms found his shoulders and your head came to his chest, “Shut up and finish already.” He didn’t release you from the binding, instead pulling the right arm under the hold of his slender tendril to keep it safe and out of the way.  His hands were both at the base of his cock while you were gently riding him. Well, “you”. He was still using his powers to manipulate your body on and off of him. Alastor’s fingers were spreading your arousal down his shaft and along his tightening balls, if you had looked at his face you’d have seen a weakened man there, furrowed brows and lust drunk eyes. But you didn’t look, trying to hide the same expression on your own features. 
Left hand free, no need to hold yourself up, you made lazy, and you hoped subtle, circles around your clit. You weren’t sure if this was a total failure or not, but you could finish and say something good came of it. You, specifically. 
Things were quiet, though. The loudest sound in the room was the wet pop coming from where his body was meeting your sopping hole. His breathing was fast and soft, sighing when he bottomed out. Another bite to your lip, a few more deep hits to your cervix, and you enjoyed a small but satisfying release. The hand on you stayed through, riding out tiny waves of pleasure as you twitched around him. When you felt his release you sighed, you did it. You think. Maybe. Regardless. 
As he slowly lifted you, you considered if your legs could hold you—
Up you went and back down you fell as he took a new, quicker pace.
“A-Ah-lastor?! You,” you bit your tongue, “already finished?”
You had made a mistake earlier that you hadn’t even realized. But Alastor had been holding it between his sharp teeth, “How many times?”
Absolutely no idea what he was talking about, you gasped out a reply, “What!?”
“How many times should I fill you before you’re too filthy to return to heaven, do you think?” He couldn’t be serious. “Three? Five? You see, the advantage of using my tentacles is that I don't get tired.”
Oh, but he was serious. 
The battle was entirely forfeit somewhere around the third time he flooded you with his seed.
“These aren’t the usual screams I enjoy from my studio, but I’m not averse to them.”
 When he felt you’d learned whatever lesson you were supposed to be taking in by the pump full, you were finally removed from him. He covered your lower half with his coat around your waist. It would be lying to say you were surprised to find his wide shoulders and small waist wasn’t just an illusion of his well tailored, yet oddly torn, coat. He was annoyingly attractive. Who gave him the right?
Your legs gave out when you tried to stand, warm hands pulling under your armpits to get you back on your feet. As much as you wanted to push him away, you were still a little tipsy and your legs still getting used to full blood flow. His arm held out for you to use for stability, you took it and wobbled silently to the floor you both lived on. Before you left the elevator you looked down and saw a line of white dripping down your inner leg. Took longer than you expected, honestly. 
When you turned to the right to go to your door, his arm came around your waist and shepherded you to his room on the left. You shot him a look, asking what he thought he was doing. 
He laughed, “Oh, after tonight’s little escapade, you’re moving!” He opened his door and gestured for you to enter, “Welcome home, my dear.”
What was worse than a failure? A catastrophe? This was that. 
“Now come on, we need to get you cleaned up.” A hand patted softly at your ass before ushering you inside.
He did just that, wiping you down and undressing you before settling you into his bed. Exhausted and sore, you decided to argue after sleep.
When you awoke, you checked your shredded bottoms for your phone. Nothing. 
An answer was found when you mentioned it to Alastor, who asked what you were searching for so early in the morning, “Perhaps someone at that venue you enjoyed has it? Too bad you can’t go back and ask.” He was resting his back against the headboard, you realized he’d unbuttoned his shirt quite a bit. “Oh well!”
How was he always making you scream?
ᡣ𐭩ˋ°•*⁀➷ masterlist
∰ Summoning the Horny Little Deer Cult (general tag list):
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@asianfrustration13 @alittletiredcry @sirens-and-moonflowers @alastorssimp
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saintsenara · 5 months
Note
Riddle’s extremely fearful and aggressive reaction to Dumbledore when he thinks he’s a doctor (and the fact that he assumes this at all and believes he is being lied to) has some pretty dark implications (which of course no one follows up on). Do you have thoughts?
thank you very much for the ask, anon!
and yes - this has occurred to me too... which means that my thoughts come with a trigger warning for the sexual abuse of a child, and are under the cut.
the relevant scene in canon is, of course, this:
“I am Professor Dumbledore.” “Professor?” repeated Riddle. He looked wary. “Is that like doctor? What are you here for? Did she get you in to have a look at me?”  He was pointing at the door through which Mrs. Cole had just left. “No, no,” said Dumbledore, smiling.  “I don’t believe you,” said Riddle. “She wants me looked at, doesn’t she? Tell the truth!”  He spoke the last three words with a ringing force that was almost shocking. It was a command, and it sounded as though he had given it many times before. His eyes had widened and he was glaring at Dumbledore, who made no response except to continue smiling pleasantly. After a few seconds Riddle stopped glaring, though he looked, if anything, warier still. “Who are you?” “I have told you. My name is Professor Dumbledore and I work at a school called Hogwarts. I have come to offer you a place at my school - your new school, if you would like to come.”  Riddle’s reaction to this was most surprising. He leapt from the bed and backed away from Dumbledore, looking furious.  “You can’t kid me! The asylum, that’s where you’re from, isn’t it? ‘Professor,’ yes, of course - well, I’m not going, see? That old cat’s the one who should be in the asylum. I never did anything to little Amy Benson or Dennis Bishop, and you can ask them, they’ll tell you!”
the surface-level reading of this scene - which is clearly what the text wants us to go for - is that riddle thinks he's about to be institutionalised for being "mad" - and, specifically, that he thinks that what dumbledore has been told is his "madness" is actually his magic.
[he is also clearly meant to be read as panicking a little bit that he's fucked around torturing his fellow children and is now about to find out...]
that riddle accepts he's a wizard so easily - and that he is so reassured by dumbledore agreeing that he's not mad - is something the text wants us to read as sinister. him immediately describing himself as "special" is set up as a precursor to the adult voldemort's delusions of grandeur - which the entire arc of the series, ending in his death as an ordinary man, is designed to undermine.
but i've always disliked this reading. the eleven-year-old riddle - a magical child raised around non-magical people - is objectively correct to describe his powers as "special" [in that they make him identifiably different from the crowd] within the context in which he lives. the word choice is nowhere near as deep as dumbledore decides - he's clearly known since he was very young that he's a wizard, but he didn't have the precise language to describe this fundamental part of himself until dumbledore offered it; prior to that, "special" is a perfectly reasonable alternative term.
and, in always knowing that he's a wizard, he also knows that he doesn't have a mental illness - but he must also know that this is something it's near impossible for him to prove.
in the real world, if i spoke to a patient who told me:
“I can make things move without touching them. I can make animals do what I want them to do, without training them. I can make bad things happen to people who annoy me. I can make them hurt if I want to.”
then i would be correct to describe them as experiencing psychosis. and i might - depending on their other symptoms - have reasonable cause to admit them [voluntarily or not] for psychiatric treatment.
riddle is - of course - demonstrably not psychotic. but it's not unreasonable that mrs cole would assume he is - the world she lives in, as a muggle [even if she's a religious one], is one in which people do not possess the ability to move objects or control animals with their minds, and if one of her charges is convinced that he can, then she's justified in seeking medical intervention.
[that psychiatric treatment in the 1930s can be described without exaggeration as inhumane is another matter...]
which is to say, i think we can easily suppose that mrs cole has - prior to dumbledore's arrival - succeeded in having riddle "looked at", and that the idea that he's mentally ill and should be committed to an asylum has been mentioned before. i think most of us would be instinctively [and angrily] wary of doctors if this happened to us, regardless of how nice the doctors in question were.
and maybe that's all there is to it.
and maybe it isn't...
in the doylist text, the eleven-year-old riddle's personality is the way it is because he's the villain of the series. where harry is preternaturally capable, even as a child, of all the things the series defines as admirable - above all, enduring difficulty without complaint - riddle is preternaturally incapable of them. he's meant to come across as unambiguously sinister - and the fact that the text repeatedly emphasises that he has control over his unpleasant traits invites us to view him as someone who is acting with full agency. that he lives in an orphanage is a trope which the text uses, like a campy horror film might, predominately to underscore how creepy he is - and the text, in keeping with its general lack of interest in states and their institutions, never really prompts us to interrogate the impact of his childhood upon the course his life takes.
[this is despite the fact that voldemort's reliving of the night he killed the potters in deathly hallows is an incredibly accurate depiction of ptsd...]
but it's also the case that the eleven-year-old riddle's behaviour and personality fits a pattern we might expect to see in a child who is being abused, sexually or otherwise:
he's aggressive, he has a hair-trigger temper, and he becomes distressed even by behaviour - such as dumbledore speaking mildly and calmly - which would not ordinarily be expected to provoke such a reaction.
his broader emotional state is fractious. his mood changes sharply, he seems to feel emotions very profoundly, he struggles to control his emotional response to things, he's extremely easily irritated, he's attention-seeking - and he particularly seeks negative attention, and he's very highly-strung. his admission in deathly hallows that he feels calm before he kills - or before he otherwise eradicates a threat or a problem - comes with the flip-side that he's someone who appears, when things aren't going well or he finds himself in a situation which he can't control, to become quite anxious. which is a trauma response.
he's extremely isolated. the text presents the fact that he has no friends as a deliberate choice - "lord voldemort has never had a friend, nor do i believe that he has ever wanted one" - and his relationship with everyone else he ever meets, including his fellow orphans, is defined by the text as exclusively involving him controlling, manipulating, and punishing them. or: he is always the more powerful person in the pairing. but this need for control can be read as self-protective just as easily as it can be read as sinister. there are hints in canon that riddle is not just some malevolent force in the orphanage preying on mild-mannered innocents. for example, billy stubbs, the owner of the rabbit he kills, is targeted by riddle as revenge: “Billy Stubbs’s rabbit... well, Tom said he didn’t do it and I don’t see how he could have done, but even so, it didn’t hang itself from the rafters, did it? [...] But I’m jiggered if I know how he got up there to do it. All I know is he and Billy had argued the day before." on the rare occasions billy turns up in fics, he's usually - i find - written very like neville - sweet and guileless and a bit pathetic. but the alternative reading - especially when we take into account that riddle attacks the rabbit rather than billy himself - is that billy is someone he would be afraid to physically confront. indeed, it's striking that voldemort - at all stages of his life - is described as being quite physically fragile. not only is he very thin, but he's always cold and his heartbeat is described several times in canon as irregular. i think this is supposed to be a comment on the physical changes he undergoes the more horcruxes he makes - although the idea that the soul would affect the heart doesn't actually align with how the series understands the soul to relate to the body - but it can also be interpreted perfectly legitimately as something he was experiencing prior to splitting his soul. i am committed to the headcanon that riddle was quite a sickly child - and that this is one of the things which drives his fear of death - and i'm also committed to the idea that his obsession with magic is because the enormity of his magical power makes up for his physical lack. he can defeat - and humiliate and frighten and remove the threat of - billy or dennis [or even an adult man?] with magic. without it, if they were to physically overpower him, then he wouldn't be able to throw them off.
he is extremely nervous about being alone in a room with dumbledore - someone he doesn't know, and who he assumes is connected to a profession [and, maybe, who knows any other doctors he's been previously made to see...] of which he is frightened.
he doesn't trust or confide in anyone - which, as a child, means particularly that he doesn't trust or confide in adults in positions of responsibility. he's clearly uneasy with the idea of finding himself in the subordinate position in an adult-child relationship when dumbledore offers to take him shopping for school supplies - potentially because he's worried that dumbledore will try and dictate or restrict what he's allowed to buy unless he behaves in a certain way... and i am always very struck that dumbledore says in half-blood prince: "He was very guarded with me; he felt, I am sure, that in the thrill of discovering his true identity he had told me a little too much. He was careful never to reveal as much again." this is presented in the text as evidence that dumbledore is the only person of whom voldemort is afraid - by which the text means that voldemort acknowledges that dumbledore knows that an ordinary man, mortal and unimpressive, lurks behind the mask of unassailable power he has created for himself; and which the text thinks is a good thing. but we can also read it as a self-protective act on riddle's part. in his excitement, he offers dumbledore information [that he is known to be a liar, that he is in trouble a lot, that mrs cole dislikes him and is disinclined to believe anything he says] which would give dumbledore - or anyone in a similar position of power and presumed respectability - cover to abuse him, safe in the knowledge that he would be unlikely to be believed if he reported it.
he doesn't appear to feel safe in the orphanage and he's frequently absent from it - by his own admission, he spends a huge amount of time wandering around london on his own, which may even involve him staying away for several days at a time. nobody appears to notice or care about this.
he's very independent - which the text again presents as evidence of his deliberate self-isolation and rejection of the bonds of love and friendship - and his independence is unusual for a child his age [i.e. that he is capable of doing all his own shopping for school].
his knowledge of violence - i.e. how he designs the trip to the cave to be maximally psychologically devastating for dennis and amy and devoid of repercussions for himself - is also more advanced and methodical than would be expected in a child of his age. again, the text uses this to emphasise how inextricable the child-voldemort is from his adult self - and also, to some extent, to underscore the intellectual brilliance [his magic is also more advanced than is normal for a child] which his narrative archetype [the exceptional villain who is defeated by the everyman hero] requires. but we can also read it as evidence of his own victimisation. a common sign that a child is being sexually abused is that they display a knowledge of sexual behaviour which is more advanced than is reasonable for a child of their age - for example, knowing in detail how a sex act is performed, or fluently using sexual slang which they have no chance of knowing either from age-appropriate settings like school-based sex education or conversations with a parent or trusted adult, or from the sort of enthusiastic hoarding of rude words and phrases all children enjoy as they grow up. riddle's precise, clinical knowledge of how to manipulate, frighten, torture, and control can be seen as something similar. if he can - at eleven or younger - methodically break down another child until they're "never quite right" again, then this is because he's learned how to from someone.
he keeps secrets. and he also goes out of his way to extract them. his grooming of ginny in chamber of secrets - he manipulates her into confiding things she wants to keep to herself, promises he won't tell anyone, and then uses the threat that he will to get her to do his bidding - is an absolutely textbook example of how abusers use the idea of secrecy to control their victims. it doesn't make his abuse of ginny any less inexcusable if we assume he learns this from being on the other side of things.
dumbledore understands his little cache of objects as trophies he's taken from victims - and the text takes the view that dumbledore is correct in this assessment. that hoarding trophies is something widely associated with serial killers means that this is yet another thing which underlines how creepy - and how like his adult self - the child-voldemort is. but it's also the case that the adult - and teenage - voldemort places a lot of emphasis on gift-giving as part of his control over other people. the two most obvious examples in canon are wormtail being given his shiny hand as a reward for helping voldemort get his body back, and slughorn being buttered up with crystallised pineapple before voldemort asks him about horcruxes. the text thinks this is sinister - and one of the reasons it does this is because gift-giving is a grooming tactic. the text also clearly thinks this isn't behaviour voldemort has learned from the other side. and yet a common sign that a child is being abused is if they have possessions it doesn't make sense for them to own [i.e. a child from a low-income background who is suddenly decked in designer clothes] and which they can't or won't explain how they came by. riddle's cache isn't luxurious - although he's so poor that a yoyo or a mouth organ probably is a luxury to him - but there's also nothing in canon which precludes the objects being presents, rather than stolen goods. if the spell dumbledore uses to make the box rattle is caused by a statement which is both relatively ambiguous and dependent on dumbledore's subjective personal morality - is there anything in this room he's acquired through nefarious means? - then the spell would still work as it does in canon if riddle was an abuse victim given the objects as "rewards". dumbledore's tendency to locate right and wrong in the individual and dumbledore's belief that good people should steadfastly endure misery means he can be written entirely canon-coherently as someone who would think a victim who appeared to collude in their own abuse - such as a victim who "offered" a sexual act because their abuser promised them something if they did - was behaving consensually, manipulatively, and nefariously. and it's worth noting that when riddle doesn't know what dumbledore has done to make the box rattle, he is "unnerved". when he realises dumbledore thinks he's stolen the objects - and that he has no interest in forcing him to admit this aloud - he is "unabashed". perhaps because he's just received proof that an experience he doesn't want to talk about is still secret...
on the other hand, the objects could indeed be stolen - because petty criminality and anti-social behaviour, especially in pre-teen children, is also a sign of abuse.
he can be extremely obsequious - when dumbledore tells him to watch how he speaks he becomes "unrecognisably polite", he ruthlessly flatters slughorn, and he is cringingly deferential to hepzibah smith. the text understands this as evidence that his apparent charm is only superficial - another trait associated in the popular imagination with serial killers [and it's striking that so much about the young voldemort - handsome, charming, seemingly quiet and polite, true evil lurking underneath the mask - is exactly like the pop-culture persona which has been created for ted bundy...]. voldemort himself agrees that his charm is performative in chamber of secrets: “If I say it myself, Harry, I’ve always been able to charm the people I needed. So Ginny poured out her soul to me, and her soul happened to be exactly what I wanted." but his obsequiousness is also a fawn response - a way of minimising a threat by attempting to please the person issuing it. he becomes "unrecognisably polite" - after all - in response to this: Dumbledore raised his eyebrows. “If, as I take it, you are accepting your place at Hogwarts - ” “Of course I am!” “Then you will address me as ‘Professor’ or ‘sir.’ ”  Riddle’s expression hardened for the most fleeting moment before he said, in an unrecognisably polite voice, “I’m sorry, sir. I meant - please, Professor, could you show me - ?”  riddle could reasonably interpret what dumbledore says here as a threat to prevent him attending hogwarts - even though dumbledore evidently doesn't mean it in this way - and he switches to being fawning because this is something he really doesn't want to happen...
do i think that any of this is what the text was actually going for? no. and nor do i think that reading riddle as a victim of abuse excuses the violence which the adult voldemort goes on to perpetuate.
but i think it is a reading of his characterisation which is both canon-plausible and interesting - a strange, sickly child with a reputation for cruelty and dishonesty being abused by the respectable doctor who is constantly called in to treat his coughs and wheezes, who buys him little presents and charms him into telling him secrets, who then [to paraphrase the teenage voldemort] feeds him a few secrets of his own, safe in the knowledge that nobody will ever believe him if he tries to get help.
and i also think this a reading which is sincerely important.
a significant contributor to the prevalence of child abuse - no matter what exact form this abuse takes - is that we are culturally conditioned to imagine that both the abuser and the victim will look and behave in a certain way if the abuse is "real".
and this means, all too often, that we take child abuse more seriously when the victim is "sympathetic" - when they're from a stable home, and their family are respectable, and they do well in school, and they're polite and sweet, and they look innocent, and they behave perfectly appropriately for their age, and nobody would ever dare to say that they come across as older than they are, and they're white, and they don't have a history of lying, and they don't have a history of attention-seeking, and they don't have a criminal record, and they're not abusive themselves, and there's absolutely no way of suggesting that they colluded in their abuse, and the perpetrator was someone who looks like a child abuser.
someone who is creepy, low-status, ugly, unpopular. someone who everyone can tell is socially abnormal, someone who nobody would ever intentionally permit to be around their children. not someone who is charming, well-respected, attractive, rich, popular, trustworthy. not someone who has a loving family and a happy home. not someone we might be friends with.
but many perpetrators of child abuse are these second group of people. and many victims of child abuse are "unsympathetic", when their social positions and reputations are compared to their abusers' own.
they lie. they steal. they're attention-seeking. they're vindictive. they have trouble distinguishing between imagination and reality. they're violent. they're bullies. they hurt animals. they abuse other children. they take drugs. they're mentally-ill. they come from broken homes. they're in the care of the state. they're dirty. they're poor. they're odd. they're behind at school and badly-behaved in the classroom. they do things which allow their abuse to be dismissed as something they brought upon themselves - they speak or dress in certain ways, they pose provocatively in pictures and post them on the internet, they are known to be sexually active outside of the context of their abuse, they lie about being over the age of consent, they engage in sexual behaviour with an adult abuser in a way which appears [even though it isn't, and there's never a circumstance in which it will be] to be consensual or for their own personal gain, they are flattered by the attention they receive from someone who is important or attractive grooming them, they have complicated - and not always wholly negative - feelings towards their abusers.
and they are still - unequivocally - victims, and what happens to them is still - unequivocally - abuse.
tom riddle is an unsympathetic victim - not only of any potential abuse, but also of the horrors of his life which are explicit on the canon page: that he is raised in an orphanage; that he is grieving; that he knows nothing about his family; that he is thought to be mad.
the absence of any institutional response to his childhood experiences - dumbledore, by his own admission, discloses nothing about riddle to his fellow teachers - is a flaw repeated again and again in the worldbuilding of the harry potter series.
hogwarts - and the wizarding [and muggle] state more broadly - doesn't intervene in any case of neglect or abuse, from harry to snape to voldemort's own parents. the series' individualistic morality means that we aren't supposed to interrogate these collective failings. and the series' black-and-white view of good and evil - and its general belief that violence is fine if the person it happens to "deserves" it - means that it has no interest in examining the ways that poverty, isolation, and neglect are risk factors; that straightforwardly unpleasant people can still be victims; that victims can go on to become perpetrators without their victimhood ceasing to matter; and that the abuse of children usually takes place not in silence and secrecy, concealed in ways which make it fine for adults not to notice it and not to intervene, but in plain sight.
this is knowledge it never hurts to refresh. thinking about lord voldemort's childhood might be an usual way of doing so... but it is an effective one nonetheless...
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lushaletta · 6 months
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I have a question??? Could you do Fred Weasley x older sister Potter reader who's he's friends with and like headcanons of their relationship please and thank you
in good hands / fred weasley
pairing: fred weasley x fem!reader
content: mild swearing, older sister potter!reader
summary: being harry potter’s older sister is difficult. you hate watching your little brother get hurt both physically and emotionally, but fred happens to be a great protector.
a/n: MY FRED WEASLEY DEBUT!! george is my fav but fred is so arghghghgh hot. anywayyyy tysm for this request and i’m sorry i didn’t follow it to a t!! i was originally gonna do headcanons as requested but i kinda got in the zone… i do kinda like this pairing though so i may end up doing hcs eventually anyway! also my bad for this taking FOREVER i’ve been madly busy… love u folks
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⋆ ࣪.  ⁺⑅ ⋰˚ *.゚ .˳⁺⁎˚ ˚⁎⁺˳ . ༺ ˖࣪ ˖࣪ ∗
Harry comes running into your room, soaked with both rain water and agitation. His broom is immediately tossed to the side and you can’t help but be concerned— you have a feeling you know what this is going to be about, and it’s not the first time.
“Harry?”
“So sick of it! I only try to help, you know? To make things better and no one ever gives a fuck! No gratitude or even kindness, after everything I’ve done.” Your face softens as he inches towards you, even being careful not to get your bed wet with his clothing.
“They’re still mad at you for losing the game? Are you serious?” You’re completely furious. Harry’s had the world on his shoulders since forever and his entire life is a tragedy. He can’t even play a school sport without being reamed for something that’s hardly his fault.
Peeling his jersey off, he crawls into your side and waits for your affection; the only thing he can count on when the world isn’t on his side.
“I tried to fix things, you know? Told Fletcher I was sorry but they’re still pissed, calling me a freak and saying all this crap about Voldemort.” You shush him and cradle his face in your arms. Your heart is breaking because how could anyone treat your baby brother like this, how could anyone see him as something less than precious?
His eyes shimmer but not with the sparkle of joy. They’re teary. “Fuck ‘em all. They’ll come around, Harry. They do eventually.”
It’s not fair what they do to him. He’ll mess something up and half the time it’s out of his control, and suddenly he’s public enemy number one. You’re usually there to help, and so are his friends like Hermione and Ron, but it can’t always be like this.
He’s okay after a while. You amp up the jokes and ruffle his hair and he’s okay. He has dinner with his group and you with yours. It’s a nice evening and all you can do is hope he’s forgetting everything wrong with the world. It seems like he is, because he’s tossing peanuts in the air and catching them in his mouth while Ron is laughing hysterically and Hermione is resting her hand on a judgemental expression.
“Oi, Weasley!” you say, and Fred whips his head towards you. “I’ve got something to ask. A favour.”
He perks up. You were asking him for a favour. He’s been waiting for his in since forever, but he wouldn’t let you know that. “Yeah?” he replies, taking a sip of pumpkin juice.
A quick breath escapes your lips as you lean on him, lashes fluttering and a little grin settled on your face. He can look at you trying to be all persuasive without blushing. He’s stronger than this.
“How about.. you and George look after Harry? I’ve been worried about him, with the whole dementor thing. And after what happened last game, I can’t just sit from the stands and watch him get injured again knowing I didn’t do anything about it. Everyone’s pissed at him.”
Fred softens. His mind races, trying to come up with the cons of the request. He comes up empty. This was an excuse to talk to you more and, well, he already quite liked Harry, so that was no issue. And with your convincing doe eyes, how could he refuse?
He’s taking too long to respond and he knows it, but he can’t stop staring at your pretty face. You clear your throat, prodding for an answer. “Huh? Oh, yeah. The lad’s gonna be in good hands, m’lady,” he winks.
The roll of your eyes makes him smile. “Better make sure of it, Weasley.”
And to shut you up, he shoves a grape between your lips and you smack him across the arm.
From then on, Fred and George made sure no one got in Harry’s way. Someone messed with him, they messed with them. The twins were 190 and a half centimetres of beater strength and poking the bear was on no one’s to-do list, so Harry was pretty much set. Well, not entirely.
All Harry really wants to do is sit down and catch up on the pile of homework he’s missed for Chosen One duties, but some people take that as being haughty.
“Potter. You and your godforesaken hero complex. You think you’re untouchable? What’ll happen if I sock you in the face, huh? You think magic will—“
“Fuck around and find out.”
Finnick Lewis turns around. He immediately backtracks. “Hey, listen, man, I don’t want any trouble.” Fred didn’t miss the nasty glare that Lewis sent Harry on his way out. He’d take care of that one later.
The boy doesn’t really know what’s just happened or why, but he’ll take whatever he can get and he’ll be grateful for it. He mumbles out a thank you before scrambling to his room.
You’d seen Fred’s effort in protecting your brother. He’d done a damn good job at it too, because Harry hadn’t complained much about students in weeks. You’re glad you at least took that load off his shoulders.
“Tell you what, Weasley,” you say nonchalantly, unwrapping a chocolate.
He hums. It’s a lazy Sunday afternoon and he’s trying to finish up an essay. Lupin likes him just fine, but he’s definitely a tough grader.
“If you can make sure Harry’s perfectly uninjured after the next game, I’ll give you a kiss.”
Who cares about Lupin? Fred looks up at you instantly, suddenly feeling the velvet of the chair on his skin. “I’ll totally bite. How many seconds?”
You snort. “The kiss?” He nods. “3 seconds. 5 if I’m feeling generous.”
The essay is forgotten just like that.
The man moved the moon and sun to ensure Harry’s safety on his watch. Lewis and Fletcher had their tails between their legs after a few careful threats and actions to back them up, and Harry felt good. Safe. That’s all that mattered.
Monday arrives and the Quidditch stands are a sea of red and green with Gryffindor particularly antsy as Harry zooms around the pitch, Golden Snitch right within his view but not quite arms reach.
“Potter’s got his eye on the prize! I’ve got mine on too, Johnson looks impeccable in robes, I’ll tell you that much— Sorry, Professor.”
Fred’s holding his own, watching out for any foul play from the Slytherin Seeker whilst batting Bludgers. George is at his side, throwing them out and scoring right into Flint’s stomach.
“Wonderful play from Weasley! Not quite sure which one, but great nonetheless,” Lee says through the megaphone.
Fred’s just about to hit a Bludger into the opposing Keeper’s side, but he spots Harry in the corner of his eye being tailed by Higgs and there’s a nasty Slytherin Bludger coming right for him and he’s flying there immediately.
Harry’s so pumped with adrenaline and focus on the Snitch, he doesn’t even notice the ball coming straight to his nose. Godric knows that would leave a mark. Fred comes up and bats it away, nearly falling off his broom.
You’re watching from the stands in admiration and excitement and Fred can’t help but find you in the crowd. He sends you a wink from the pitch and a girl beside you seems to think it’s for her. You let it happen. You know who it belonged to.
Gryffindor emerges victorious, winning by two points and Harry’s crowd surfing, a big smile on his face as students chant his name. He doesn’t know how long the fame will last, but he doesn’t really care.
“You did good, Weasley,” you admit as Fred comes up beside you.
“Think I deserve my kiss now?”
In typical you fashion, you roll your eyes and pull him towards your face.
He thinks the kiss will be haste, but you melt into his lips and he does the very same. His arms snake around your waist and bring you impossibly closer and you relish in it. It’s embarrassing how much you’re grinning, but you can feel his smile too.
Catching your breath, “That was like 30 seconds. Now you gotta help Harry with his homework.”
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samandcolbyownme · 4 months
Text
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Summary: Reader teaches some of the kids at Alexandria to swim and Daryl is the reason for making that happen.
Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, swearing, reader in said to be 25, basically swim instructor!reader, Subtle flirting, teasing, mentions of weapons at times, Daryl being dominant, kissing, biting, scratching, hair pulling, oral (fem rec), unprotected sex, use of daddy, fluff and filth
Word Count: 3.9k | Not edited
ᖭི༏ᖫྀ ⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ᖭི༏ᖫྀ ⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ᖭི༏ᖫྀ ⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆ᖭི༏ᖫྀ
4 • WEEKS • EARLIER
“I miss swimming.” You sigh as you motion to the green, swampy looking pool. Michonne nods, “Pool side with a margarita? Mmm.”
“Now you’re teasing.” You joke, laughing as you walk into the house with her, “But on a serious note, how many of the kids know how to swim?”
She gives you a confused look, “I’m not sure, but I’m curious as to why you’re asking.”
“Well, I mean. As long as Alexandria stays up, the only water the kids will have to really worry about is the water that’s in the middle of the town.”
“You want to teach them to swim.” Michonne smiles and you nod, “If I could, I would. I want them to have the best chance as surviving this world. I mean look at me, I fell into that huge lake the other day and if I didn’t know how to swim I wouldn’t probably still be here.”
At this point, you didn’t know Daryl was right around the corner of the one door, listening. He had come to get you guys, but stopped when he heard you talking, and he heard everything.
“C’mon, the others are probably waiting.” Michonne nods and as you guys go to walk out of the one door, Daryl walks through the other, “Hey, Rick found somethin’.”
Present • day
“Hey.” Rick nods as you open your door. You give him a smile and tilt your head, “Need me to hang out with Jude?”
He shakes his head, “No, no. I need you to come with me.”
Your furrow your brows, “Is everything okay?”
He laughs and nods his head, reaching up to push the door open more, “Yes, now c’mon.” You go to reach for your weapons but Rick shakes his head, “You won’t need them, I promise.”
You sigh, “Fine.” You laugh as you walk out the door, waiting for Rick at the bottom of the stairs. You follow him as he starts walking down the road, “So, a little birdie told me that you have experience with teaching kids how to swim.”
“Lifeguard for a few years.” You shrug, “Why, what’s up?”
Rick looks at you and smirks, “Now, it’s not perfect okay. It’s the best we could do, y’know, for what we could find.”
“What are you talking about?” You ask, stopping when you realize you’re out front of Daryl’s house, “Why are we here? Isn’t he on a run today?”
Rick nods, “We’re goin’round back.”
He leads you outback and your mouth drops as an actual running, underground pool comes into view, “Rick, how in the fuck?”
You look at him, still shocked and he laughs, “I’m just glad we could get it up and running, it’s been getting hotter these last few days, oh, and Michonne also has a schedule for you with a list of kids.”
“Rick Grimes.” You shake your head, fingers moving up cover your lips, “Oh my god. You guys.”
“This was mostly Daryl.”
You whip your body towards him, “What?”
He nods, “He overheard you guys talking. He came to Michonne and I after we got back.”
“That sneaky son of a bitch.” You shake your head, “So you’re not mad I brought back a few swimsuits and stuff for the kids then?”
He gives you a funny look, “Why? They’ll give the kids a sense of normality, you know?”
You let out a sigh, looking back at the pool, “How soon do I start?” Rick tilts his head, giving you a shrug, “Tomorrow? Probably noon?”
You nod, “Deal.”
Later on that day, you waited by that gate. All of your stuff was done, if anyone needed you, you weren’t hiding.
“You still waiting?” Carol comes up to sit down on the ground next to you. You nod, “I’m planting one on him. I’m not giving him any time to run.”
“I take it you found out about the pool?”
“Why didn’t anyone mention we had a pool lying around?” You look at her, shocked like it’s the worst news anyone kept from you.
She laughs, “It’s Daryl’s house, y/n. The only people that have ever been inside of that place is Rick, myself, and you.”
You smirk, “Yeah, I wouldn’t wanna be caught dead in his house unwanted.”
“Can I be nosey?” Carol asks, but her tone made it sound like she was going to ask anyway. You laugh, giving her a nod.
“Have you and Daryl..”
You shake your head, “No, but we have shared a few drunken kisses before.”
She giggles, “I’m not surprised. I had my thoughts about you two.” You roll your eyes, “I don’t mean to sound like a teenage girl, but. Has he said anything to me about you?”
She smirks, “He said something about your age difference because what are you like, twenty three?”
You tilt your head, “Twenty five.” You smirk, “But thank you.”
She laughs, “Wow, okay. I told him that if he didn’t I would and I think that got him thinking.” You can’t help but laugh at that, “oh my god, Carol, that is so funny.”
You hear the chains to the gate rattle and you look at Carol before standing up and walking over, arms crossed over your chest as your heart races in your chest.
You also were nervous and hoped that it was a good run, because you didn’t want to send him over the edge with what you planned on doing.
You see the other walking in, smiles on their faces so you know you had the green light. A huge smile appears on your lips as soon as you see Daryl.
He shakes his hair out of his eyes and smiles back at you, walking over as his arm reaches out for you, “Did y-“
You cut him off, hands on his cheeks as you press your lips to his.
His hand falls on your waist and everyone around you stops and starts to smile and give you low , “Oooh’s”
He smirks against your lips, waving everyone off with a smirk. You lean back, looking up at him with a smile, “Thank you for making that happen for me.”
He shrugs, “Helps the kids y’know, jus’like y’said.” He gives you a wink and you shake your head, “just admit it, Daryl Dixon.” You say as he walks away, pulling a cigarette up to his lips, “You love me.”
He turns around, lighting the cigarette, “I ain’t admittin’ t’shit, darlin’.”
But he didn’t have to.
——
“Alright my sweeties, look at me. When you want to doggy paddle, okay. You’re going to have your arms and hands like this.” You demonstrate by putting your arms in front of you, “And then you’re going to want to kick your feet behind you, and you want to keep your head up.”
As you demonstrate, you don’t realize that you’re being watched from Daryl’s bedroom window.
He loves how you can go from being so tough and hard shelled out on runs, to absolutely relaxing the second you see those children running to give you a hug. He loved how gentle you were with them, always treated them like they were your own when they were in your care.
But that’s how he is, too. Daryl can be a softy when he wants to be, and what grew into you being his, what it felt like, best friend, allowed that.
He couldn’t lie, thought, the thought of you having his baby did cross his mind, but that always lead into him thinking about his cum being inside of you and so on.
You both were actually madly in love with each other, you both just liked the chase and screwing with each other, a lot.
You had fun together, but after this. You needed him to be fully yours, even if you have to kick yourself in the ass everyday for not doing it sooner, he will still be yours.
“Yes! Judith! Great job!” You clap your hands and the other kids follow. You smile that smile that Daryl loves so much, only him and the kids really ever bring it out.
“Alright, RJ, your turn, honey! Just do exactly what Judith did okay?” You watch as he does it perfectly and you cheer him on, “That was good! Great job!”
Daryl also can’t help but notice how tight your swim suit hugs your body. He had a feeling that he knew you wore that one on purpose, you know, with it being his house and all.
That soon would be proven correct, too.
Before Daryl decides to leave and go somewhere else for the time being, you glance up, having the feeling you’re still being watched and you smirk quickly when you look up and see him already staring.
You lick your lips before tuning your attention back to the kids.
Later on that day, you walk up to Daryl and nudge him with your elbow, “Didn’t know we moved up to stalking, I would have been watching you through your window a lot sooner.”
You laugh at your own joke and he looks at you, rolling his eyes, “You’re great w’the kids, y’know that?”
You nod, “Yeah, yeah, I’ve been told.”
“Y/n! Come on!” Rosita calls for you and you let out a sigh, “Gotta go.” You smile at him and he nods, “Be careful, a’ight.”
“Always am.”
——
The second day, Daryl had come down to the pool, smiling and talking with the kids as they tell them how much fun they’re having.
He tells them to hang on as he walks over to where you’re standing in the water, “You need me?”
He nods, motioning for you to come over. You had moms there today so you signaled for them to keep an eye on the group while you swam over to the wall, “What’s up, sweetie?”
He snickers at the nickname and bends down, “Y’wanna go onna run w’me later? We can take the bike.”
“Um, hell yes.” You smirk, “I love seeing you on that thing.” He chuckles, shaking his head, “Yeah, so you’ve said.”
You smile as you let your lower half float up, you kind of push out your ass, but Daryl notices almost instantly, “Oh, have I?”
He shakes his head, jutting his chin towards your ass, “Quit doin’at.” You okay dumb, kicking your feet slightly, “Doin’ what?”
He scoffs, lowering his voice, “Teasin’.”
You laugh slightly, “Come here.” You move to push yourself upward out of the water, hands flat on the concrete to hold you up as you whisper in his ear, “I’ll stop when you finally pin me down and absolutely fuck me into your mattress.”
You gasp quietly as you lean away, lowering yourself back into the water, “oops. Gotta go. Come find me about that run later.”
You swim away to continue coaching the children and Daryl stares at you for a few seconds, trying to keep his cock from growing anymore, but your voice just plays in his head, over and over against like a broken record.
He stands up and manages to go inside before anyone could notice, but you definitely knew.
Later on that day, Daryl cancelled of course. You had a feeling he was going to chicken out, but you didn’t push him.
Instead, you just waited until the sun went down.
Thankfully, they had added lights, so you knew Daryl would look to see who the hell is at his house at this time, which is exactly what you wanted.
You took off your shirt and shirts, tossing them on the chair quietly.
You worse a bra and a pair of underwear, which you knew you were safe to do.
As soon as you plugged the light in, you ran and dove in. You come to the surface, pushing water out of your face as you look up, and there he is.
Arm rested up on the window as he has his other hand in his pocket. He knew what you were doing, and it was working. He found it so hot how you were so comfortable with yourself to be out there, alone and vulnerable, but it was even hotter that he knew you can handle your own.
His head shakes side to side as he watches you in the water, and it isn’t long before he’s gone walking towards you, arms out slightly, “What the hell are ya doin’?”
“Listen, here Dixon, I belong on a beach, with messy hair, tanned skin, and a margarita watching the waves and obviously I can’t do that, so this is my only option.”
He shakes his head, looking around, “yeah, m’sorry ya can’t have that.”
You shrug, “Why’d you cancel on me?”
He sighs giving you a chuckle. You swim over to where he sits down on the concrete, “Huh?”
He pulls a cigarette out of the pack and lights it, “Y/n.”
“C’mon. I know you like me.” You reach out, leaving a wet spot on his knee as you poke it, “Admit it.”
“I ain’t admittin’ shit cause I don’t have to. Y’know I love you, darlin’”
You state up at him, “Say it again.”
He takes a drag of his cigarette and shrugs, “Get out’a the pool and maybe I will.”
You lift yourself up, pulling yourself up onto the concrete and stand there, “Tell me again, Daryl Dixon.”
He puts his cigarette out beside him before looking up at you, “I love you.”
You were on your knees for him, lips on his, your hands on his chest and neck as you lean into him. His hands slides down your back, moaning against your lips as he pulls you closer to him.
“What was it you wanted me to do earlier today?”
You smirk, and he tilts his head, “Say it f’me, baby. C’mon.”
“Take me inside, pin me down and absolutely fuck me into your mattress.”
His hands are on you, moving the both of you to your feet, “Go.” He pushes you towards the house and you walk quickly inside, excited to finally get what you’ve been wanting for so long.
You go up the steps, Daryl following behind you. You reach behind your back, clipping your bra before dropping in on the steps.
He shakes his head, hands gripping your waist to spin you around to face him once you reach the top, “Look’at you.”
You bite your lip, watching as his eyes travel down to your bare boobs, “Y’got such nice tits, darlin’.” He bends down and lifts you up, kissing between them as he walks you into his room.
He kicks the door shut before he walks over and you’re tossed into the mattress. You look up at Daryl and he leans down to grab your ankles, pulling you down to the end of the bed.
Your leg bed down over the edge and his hands slide up your goosebump covered skin to your panties. You lify your hips, biting your lip as you feel them slide down your thighs.
You lean up on your elbows, lip pulled between your teeth as you watch the man infront of you kiss up the inside of your leg.
The stubble from his beard causing your gasp out when it tickles your skin, “P-please.”
“Listen t’you beggin’ f’me.” He mumbles against your thigh, “Been wantin’ ya, baby.”
“You could have had me any time, Daryl.” You whimper as he grows closer to your pussy, “I-I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”
He chuckles at your apology, “y’know how much it takes me not t’kill anyone who looks at’chu, huh?”
You nod, head tilting to the side as his kisses grow so close to where you need him, “I-I know what you mean.”
He pushes your thighs back as his tongue slips into your folds, causing you to gasp out loudly, “F-Fuck!”
He groans against you as he licks and laps at your pussy, his fingertips digging into your legs. Your hands go to the back of his, pulling your legs back further as your back arches.
You clench your walls around his tongue, moaning out as his nose nudges your clit just right, “F-Fuck.” You gasp out, “I think I’m close.”
You look down at him, moaning as how beautiful he looks between your legs. You bring one arm up, moving it lay over your body as your hand moves to lay on his head, pushing him into you more as you try to roll your hips.
Your mouth drops open as you feel him slide a finger in. You were immediately squeezing it, begging for more, which causes Daryl to chuckle, “Greedy lil girl t’night, ain’tcha.”
You whine at his words, “P-please.” You intertwine you fingers within his hair, tugging slightly which earns a low groan, “Fuck, hold on darlin’.”
You whimper, but that’s stopped as soon as you feel another one of his fingers push into you, “That what’cha wanted, baby, hmm?”
You mood, looking down at him, “Y-yes, Fuckfuck, yes.” You whimper as you roll your hips, “S-so close, baby.” You arch your back, your orgasm coming a lot sooner then you thought.
A string of screams, moans, and whines, leave your lips, earning praise from Daryl, “That’s it, baby.” He guides you through your high, leaning down to suck at your clit.
You roll your hips, thigh squeezing his head, “S-shit.” You gasp, “D-Daryl.”
He lifts his head, fingers slowly coming to a stop before he pulls them out, “Fuckin’ hell, baby.” He stands up, undoing his jeans before he leans forward, knees on the bed.
His hands bed down, lifting you hips and pulling you to him. He takes the head of his cock and rubs it up am down your slit as he spits down, smearing it around before slipping just the tip in.
You arch your back, going silent as you feel his cock stretch you the more he pushes in, “Fuckin’ hell, baby.” Daryl leans forward, your legs moving to wrap around his waist, “F-fuck y-you’re so big.” You whimper, “Shit.”
He smirks at your comment, leaning in to kiss up your neck as he slowly grows into a thrusting rhythm. You moan with each one, your hand grabbing his hair tighter and tighter as you cry out how good he’s making you feel into his ear.
“Thas’it, baby. Tell me how good y’feel.” He presses a kiss to your forehead and lays a hand on your cheek.
You nuzzle your head into his hand, squeezing his cock with your desperate cunt as you feel another orgasm coming on, “F-fuck.” You gasp, “Don’t stop.”
You cry out, back arching off the bed as you cum all over his cock this time around, moaning louder with each thrusts into you, “Yes, yes, yesyesyes!”
“Takin’ my cock so well, darlin’.” Daryl roughly turns your head and kisses your lips, “Y’look fuckin’ beautiful doin’ it.”
You smile at his words, moaning as he lays his hand on your throat, pinning it to the bed, “fuckin’ shit.” He groans, leaning in to kiss you again.
He heaves your body forward, wrapping his arm around you before lifting you up. Your arms go around his neck and your body starts to move against his as his hands guided you up and down.
He pauses to turn around so he can sit on the bed, and as soon as he’s down, you push him backwards, leaning down to kiss him as you hip bounce up and down on his cock.
His hands move to grip your ass, moving them faster as he bucks upward. You shoot up, hand laying flat on his chest as you squeeze his cock, moaning loudly as you lean forward, slamming your hips harder until that feeling of satisfaction washes over you.
“f-fuck.” You gasp out, “d-Daryl.”
“Shh, s’okay, baby. I got ya.” He lays a hand on the center of your back, “almost done, m’kay?” You nod, “Where do you want to finish?”
He shakes his head, “wherever y’want me to, baby.” He slowly starts to shrugs upward as he holds your hips still, “jus’let me know soon.”
He pecks at your neck, the stubble in his chin makes you gasp quietly, “i just..” you moan in his ear, “Don’t pull out.”
“Y’sure?” Daryl asks, “I do-“
“I just got over my period a few days ago, we should be good.” You kiss up his neck as you drag your finger up the other side and down his jaw, “Need all of you, baby.”
“Fuck, you’re good.” He smirks, rolling you back over. He brings your legs up, resting them against his shoulders as he slides back into you, “Y’so fuckin’ tight.”
He moans lowly, “Feels so fuckin’ good, darlin’, takin’ me so fuckin’ well, y’see that?” He slides a hand down, thumb massaging your clit as you moan out loudly, “O-oh, fuck. D-Daryl, baby.”
“Mm baby? Was’wrong, huh?” He reaches up, pointer and thumb gripping your chin, “Tell me s’I can fix it.”
“Need to cum again.” You whimper out and Daryl nods, instantly pulling his cock from your cunt and dropping down, your legs still rested over his broad shoulders.
Your heels dig into his chest as his lips wrap around you clit, causing you to moan out, “F-fu- yesyesyes.”
You spread your legs wider, forcing yourself to watch the man below you eat your cunt like there’s no tomorrow, “Fuck, yes. Just like that daddy.”
The words roll with breath you let out, but Daryl doesn’t seem to mind it, infact, it encourages him to make you cum faster, “C’mon, baby.”
He mumbles again say your cunt, “Cum f’daddy.”
You moan at his words, that is the hottest thing that has ever blessed your ears, “F-fuck.” You squeal as you feel his two fingers enter your soaked cunt, “Oh fuck, daddy yes!”
His lips suck and pull at your clit, encouraging a third orgasm to busts its way through your body, moaning loudly as your back arches and your hips roll forward.
Daryl quickly replaces his fingers with his cock, guiding you through your own orgasm as he enters his. You squeeze his cock, begging for every drop of his cum to fill you completely.
His head falls down, eyes closes as he breathes heavy for a moment. You stare up at him, reaching up to lay a hand on his cheek, “I’m definitely going to kick myself in the ass everyday for not jumping your bones sooner.”
He laughs, nodding as he nuzzles his cheek into your hand, “Yep. Me, too.” You smile and let out a sigh, “So, this means you’re mine right.”
He glances down and back up at you, “I would say so, y/n.” You smirk, biting your lip as he pulls out, “Just clarifying.”
“Everyone knows that I love you.” He stands up, “I get picked on all the time for it because I’m always staring at your ass in your jeans.”
You smirk, “I know.”
——
Sorry I haven’t gotten anything out, I’ve been having some writers block but please let me know how you liked this one!! As always, thanks for reading! I love yas! 🖤
Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!
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peachesofteal · 1 year
Note
Very curious about the aftermath of darling having to explain why they lied about taking the suppressants— would they refuse to say anything? Or during their heat would Simon & Johnny contact their doctor for something— maybe if darlings fever was higher than it should be— and found out a bit what happened to them when they were younger because they’re their medical proxy.
🖤
Takes place after this / thank you to @ghostlythunderbird for her help!
18+ MDNI / dead disco omegaverse au / cock warming / mature themes
Simon leans over the tub, fingers swirling through the extremely hot water while you whimper and gasp against Johnny’s chest, mouth half open, nearly asleep astride his lap.
“Alpha.” You whine when he shifts, face burrowed against his skin.
“I’ve got ye, darling. I’m here.” He smoothes a hand up and down your back, soothing you, all while trying not to grit his teeth too loud.
He’s teetering on the edge, cock hard again inside your body, recovered from earlier when he finally took you as Simon soaped you clean.
Simon spreads his fingers across the the small of your back, dripping water droplets up your spine before twisting a bunch of your hair into a clip to keep it from getting wet. You’d be mad if you weren’t out of your mind in a heat haze, and your hair got wet outside of a wash day.
“Johnny.” You whimper, and the Alpha’s hand disappears beneath the water in response, patting your hip and pressing his lips to gland to settle you.
Simon really wants to pluck you from the tub and spread you to wide on the bathroom floor. He wants to spread towels out to prevent your skin from being chilled and then lay you on your back, wants to fuck his come deep into your womb until you’re gushing with it, until it takes. It’s the same way Johnny felt, when you were sitting on his lap, bouncing with your desperation, crying in need for him to fill you.
If he was in a rut, no one would have even made it to the bathroom. He would have already bred you, already fucked you full of his seed and plugged it.
But he’s not. And he’s not the one in the tub right now either, so he has to attend to the other things. Just as important, not as much fun.
“A-alpha please.” You gasp, eyes wide and teary and Johnny nods, pressing a thumb against your bottom lip, and starting back up a deep, harmonic purr in hopes of getting you back to sleep.
“I know, I know.” He coos.
Simon bends, swallowing Johnny’s lips, kissing him lazily, indulging in his pants and gasps as you tighten around him. You push at Simon’s shoulder, face screwed up in irritation, and he chuckles softly before kissing you sweetly, long and deep until you’re whining for him to get in the tub behind you.
Now that they’ve started, you’ll only stop for food and rest, and getting you to eat and drink will be a challenge in itself. Everything is shifting, your unease, distress has faded away to your instincts, your drive to be bred by them, and they’ll spend the rest of your heat giving you everything you need, soothing you and praising you, comforting you and making you feel safe, satisfying and taking care of you. They’ll flood you with their DNA, their hormones, their pheromones, completing the cycle over and over until it passes.
Simon relishes it. He loves caring for you with or without your designation, loves the idea of growing their family, of him or Johnny fucking you full of themselves until you’re swelling with their baby. It’s instinct, and primal, but so, so much more with you. You’re not just some Omega… you’re theirs. Their darling. You’ve always been theirs.
Which is why he can’t stay in the bathroom, even though he dearly wants to.
Your fingers latch onto his forearm when he pulls away, and he folds you farther into Johnny, until his mouth is above your gland and he’s licking, distracting you enough for Simon to slip away.
“Her last prescription was written six months ago, but it was a lower dosage, preparing for the weaning off time frame.” The kitchen knife slows to a stop in the middle of the apple he’s cutting, and he places it down to hold the phone firmly in his hand.
“Sorry, you said… six months?” His heart thunders in his ears. Six months? Half a year? He struggles to get a handle on the ache in his soul when he thinks about you struggling for so long, without them even knowing.
The doctor sighs.
“She was advised to inform you, to see if your work schedules could be adjusted for her heats. After being on suppressants for so long, they were anticipated to be more intense, more debilitating.”
“I- I don’t understand. Why did she come off the suppressants?”
“The long term use of suppressants have had negative impacts on her body… did she not tell you?” His stomach twists.
“No, she… failed to mention. We came home to her in the beginning of a heat but, she wasn’t herself. She was self soothing, we’re very concerned.”
“As you’re aware, yourself and Mr. MacTavish are listed as medical proxy… I can email an encrypted chart with her medical information if you’d like.” He grimaces. You’re going to be so pissed, so bloody heated when you come out of this and realize they’ve trampled all over your boundaries in this way but what else can he do?
“Alright, that will work fine.”
He reads the file alone. He doesn’t think it appropriate, to read it with Johnny while you’re practically attached to him, even though that makes him feel guilty too.
But he can’t run the risk of upsetting you, not when they finally got you settled and comfortable.
So, he opens it on the couch. It’s a massive file, as he expects most Omega’s are, considering their unique genetic needs, complicated endocrine systems and of course, reproductive health needs.
He finds the chart notes from your appointment, six months ago.
“-advised pt that stopping suppressants should be considered due to impact in pheromone production and reproductive health. Advised pt that continued long term use may have permanent effects. Pt stated she understood, agreed to start next month with a lower dosage to wean off.”
He scrolls, to a visit from last year. It’s fairly standard, mentions of blood work and labs, appropriate levels and other medical jargon, but something sticks out.
“-pt inquired if it was possible to successfully bite and bond without a heat. Informed pt it was not advised.”
Why were you asking about bites? You’d never expressed interest in that to them before… you had always told them you were happy the way things were. That you didn’t need a bond to be theirs, just like you didn’t need a heat. He’s still frowning when a note from your visit three years ago jars him.
“-pt advised she feels she’s in a safe, healthy relationship, and would consider coming off suppressants. Previous feral state symptoms have seemed to completely dissipate. Pt seems happy and very healthy. I advised I feel it would be safe if she did come off her suppressants if she chose.”
Feral? Feral state?
“Oh, darling.” He murmurs. “Why didn’t you tell us?”
He scrolls farther, eyes scanning through years and years of visits, going much farther back since they’ve known you, until he finds an intake form from a hospital, when you only 16 years old.
His heart stops in his chest.
“-female Omega brought in with the group who was rescued from the trafficking ring. Fluctuates between catatonia and feral state. No bites or bonds, gland intact. Unable to verbalize her name, or memories. Started on sedative drip until specialist arrives.”
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trippinsorrows · 2 months
Text
with me + part nineteen
Tumblr media
authors note: the infamous chapter is finally here! a lot of questions you all have asked me are finally answered. i hope it's enjoyable and worth the wait!
status: in progress // masterlist
warnings: angst (discussion of child loss), language, suggestive themes
song inspo: with me by destiny’s child
faceclaims
words: 10k
taglist: @pixiedust4000 @yolobloggers @msbigredmachine @southerngirl41 @wanderingreigns @romanreignsbae
To say your 2024 Bingo card has been filled with nothing but surprises would be the understatement of the century.
The past six months, really, have been mostly wonderful but also chaotic as hell.
And if someone had told you, way back when it was just you and Joe in your own little fantasy world, that his wife would one day text you in the middle of the night, wanting to meet and join forces to combat your apparently psycho-ex best friend, you’d laugh your ass off. Laugh your ass off harder than a guest at a Katt Williams special.
But, life is funny, and God clearly has a sense of humor, because that’s exactly what happened.
It’s also why you’re sitting on Joe’s bathroom counter at 4am as he finishes up in the shower, readying for his early flight.
“I’m sorry, it completely slipped my mind to tell you I gave her your number.” Joe shuts the water off, and you immediately redirect your attention to anywhere but him as he walks out. It’s bad enough you two didn’t have enough time to get in another session before his departure, but it’s another thing to be so cruelly taunted by your sexy ass man in all his buff, your favorite pastime on fully display but unable to be touched.
Sucked.
Rode.
All of the above.
Joe continues, and your eyes land on him just as he’s knotting the towel around his waist.
“I should have asked you before I did so, but with everything going on—”
“You don’t have to apologize, Joe.” Cutting off his unnecessary apology feels like a good move, the right move. You’re not mad at him about that at all. “I know you would have never done so if you believed she had any ill intent.” And it’s the truth, especially on the eve of this Mariah mess. “Sure, I would have liked a heads up that my boyfriend’s ex-wife would be texting me asking to meet and essentially do an interview together, but it wasn’t a necessity.”
He chuckles, looking over and asking, “what are your thoughts there?”
A heavy sigh leaves your mouth at his equally heavy question. “I don’t know. I feel torn. On one hand, it’s kinda weird, ya know? Truth be told, I always figured if by some miracle I ever spoke to her, she’d try to kick my ass sooner than she’d want to grab dinner.” You quickly add, “emphasis on try because ain’t no bitch beating my ass.”
He chuckles, reaching for his deodorant. “Well, you better not be fighting nobody with my baby in you.”
Rolling your eyes, your hand naturally rests on your stomach. “I know, I just….what do you think?”
“I think you should do whatever makes you most comfortable.”
“None of this is comfortable,” you murmur, and it’s the truth. This whole thing sucks all around. “And that’s not an answer.”
He shrugs. “I can’t tell you what to do, babe.”
“Technically, you can, but you’re choosing not to. There’s a difference.”
Joe moves over and caresses your temple, sharing quietly, “I want you and Callie to come down to Philly a few days before WrestleMania. They’ll put me up in an Airbnb. I’ll make sure it’s big enough for all of us.” 
The abrupt change of topic confuses you, yes, but there’s more excitement at the thought of being reunited with him than bewilderment. It brings a small smile to your face. “Are you sure?” Any chance to see Joe will always be taken advantage of, you just don’t want your and Callie’s visiting him at such a time to cause any sort of distraction.  “I don’t want us to get in the way. You need to focus.”
“You two could never get in the way, and my focus is exactly where it should be.” His hand snakes under your shirt, feeling your soft belly. “I also want you to come to the Hall of Fame Awards with me.”
That definitely takes you by surprise. You’ve never attended any sort of formal, public event with him before, and the WWE Hall of Fame awards is like the event. “Are—are you sure that’s a good idea?” Being careful with your words and honest with yourself, you confess, “I’m not sure if it’s a good look for you to be seen so publicly and openly with me right now. Your fans already kinda hate me.”
Limiting your media consumption has been a saving grace in all this. Not that you were big on it to begin with. However, you have read a couple articles and made the even bigger mistake of reading the comments. To say some, if not most, of the internet wrestling community have nothing nice to say about you would be putting it lightly. 
There’s people cussing you out, people saying you should burn in hell for what you did, even some saying if Joe (Roman) loses at WrestleMania, it’ll be your fault.
That last one is at least a little funny to you, because for such big fans, they sure don’t know how WWE works.
Roman’s gonna retain the same way he has for almost three years. 
Ain’t shit stopping that.
“I told you before, and I’ll keep saying it until I’m blue in the face—I don’t give a fuck what they have to say about us. I love you, and I’m going to be with you, regardless of what anyone thinks. The Hall of Fame, Wrestlemania, hell, I’ll take you in the fucking ring with me if I want to.” His defense is so strong in its delivery and conviction that it almost instantly takes away any and all reservations on your end. “And they’re not fans if they have some negative shit to say about the woman I love.”
“Well, in their defense, Mariah did a damn good job making me out to be some Jezebel.”
“That’s partially why I think you should do the Live with Jadah.” His tone and expression soften, thumb rubbing against your stomach. “They don’t know you like I do, and they don’t need to per se, but they can at least see you’re not what she’s made you out to be.” He brings his mouth to your temple, lips lingering. “They can see why I love you so much.”
“Knew you had an opinion on what you think I should do.” But, regardless, you’re thankful for him truly allowing you to decide what is best for you. And you think you have. With a big breath, you settle on your final answer. “I’m gonna do it, but not even to let people see I’m not this horrible person. I just….I haven’t really had a chance to use my voice in any of this. Like…..” You work hard to help him understand where you’re coming from. “I didn’t have a voice in the DCFS situation outside of defending my parenting, but in this….there’s a chance for me to speak my side, to be able to defend myself. And I feel like I need to do it.”
“I agree.” You’re not surprised. Joe is anything and everything, including forever supportive. “Ya’ll are gonna use my Instagram to do it too.”
“Wait, what?”
“Baby, Jadah doesn’t have any social media, and you don’t need all them damn people on your page, nor do you want that.” He’s right. You hadn’t thought of it that way. “Mariah had an audience. You get one too.” 
Fair. Very fair. “Okay.”
He taps your hip, informing. “I’ll leave you the login info." It sometimes still amazes you how much he trusts you, how easy it is for share so many things with you that are objectively personal. His banking information, his fucking social medias that are literally tied to his career.
It means the world for him to have so much trust in you.
“We’re going to Disney after Mania.” 
Joe is just full of surprises, jumping from subject to subject. “What? I thought we were going for Callie’s birthday.”
“We are, for a second time, but the first time is gonna be that Tuesday after Mania. A day for you and Callie to rest.” 
You’re still trying to settle on the fact that this man is proposing two Disney visits literally back to back when something else hits you. “Wait, the week after WrestleMania? Don’t you have to work?”
“I’ve got it handled,” is all he says, all he offers, all he provides. 
“Joe, what does that even mean? How does that work? How do you just win WrestleMania and disappear right after?” Something’s not adding up. There’s something he’s not telling you, and it pisses you off for a lot of reasons, but mostly because you just hate being kept in the dark. “Is it being written into the storyline or—”
“I’ve got it handled, okay?” His tone is exasperated, which you find ironic considering you’re the one on the receiving end of his vague ass answers. “Just….trust me.”
That’s a hard one. Not trusting him. That comes second nature at this point, but trusting him and not knowing if whatever he’s handled causes any sort of problems for him. You worry about any hits he might take sometimes because of his decisions that are usually for the sake of you and Callie.
It shouldn’t bother you, but it does, especially because you know how important his career is to him.
“What about you?” That’s your biggest concern. This man has been ripping and running for what feels like months. He deserves a vacation. He needs a vacation. If he’s gonna be off for a couple days at least, why not use them to recharge? “You need to rest too, Joe. I can tell you’re exhausted, baby. There’s no need for us to go twice. We can just stick with May for her birthday.”
He shakes his head, preparing a guaranteed disagreement. “You’re gonna be five months pregnant by then. You don’t need to be walking around a damn amusement park while that far along. I don’t know if you’ll even want to.”
“Baby, trust me when I tell you, I could be nine months pregnant, and I’m still going to waddle my big ass around that park. I’m fighting any kid that tries to get in my or Callie’s way.”
He shakes his head, muttering, “the May visit might not happen if your ass gets us banned.”
“I can behave,” you murmur, recognizing you’re being a bit dramatic. Just a smidge. Disney has been a dream visit since you were a kid, so there's an immense amount of excitement at going.
“And why are we going twice anyway?” Eyes narrowing in suspicion, you realize and point out, “you’re up to something, aren’t you?” He rolls his eyes but says nothing. “You are. Oh my God, Joe, you’ve already done so much for us, we don’t need anything else. I don’t need anything else.”
It’s the truth, too. Going to Disney twice in one year when some people never get to go at all is absolutely not a necessity. No matter whatever he clearly has planned that requires two trips.
Joe looks like he wants to say something but decides against it. Annoying ass. “It better not have anything to do with a damn dog.” He laughs. “Especially with me pregnant now. Two kids under the age of 5 is gonna be a lot in and of itself.” Since you’re already on the subject, you add, “I’ve been thinking maybe my mom can come stay with us a little after the baby is born? So, I can have some help when you can’t be there.”
There’s something in Joe's expression that gives you pause, like he wants to say something but decides against it. “And I mean, I’d be fine with your mom coming too, I just—another adult will be great.” You throw that out, an honest thing, thinking maybe he’s wondering why it always has to be your mom and not more of his side of the family.
Although deep down, you know that’s not it.
“Of course, whatever you want.” He kisses your forehead and moves away to finish getting ready to go.
As much as you don’t want to feel annoyed, you do. This is at least the second or third time you’ve tried to broach the subject of post-baby, and he’s been elusive, borderline dismissive. 
It’s hard to tell if it’s because he’s maybe nervous about something, if he truly doesn’t understand why you’re wanting to discuss this now, or something else, but regardless, it’s annoying.
And you don’t like it.
You don’t like it at all.
———-
Things happen fast in Florida, or maybe it’s just you and the reality show that your life has been the past week or so.
Because one minute you’re celebrating an unexpected but welcomed pregnancy, and the next you’re the subject of major media articles, publications, and news segments. Followed up with being hit up by your boyfriend’s ex-wife, the same wife he had when you first started sleeping with him.
The same woman who you’re anxiously awaiting to ring your doorbell at any minute now.
The silence of the large house doesn’t help either. You're greatly wishing you could be distracted by Callie’s loud singing, running around, laughter, something. But, you asked Alexis to take her out for a few hours for you, not wanting her to be around in the event that things turn ugly.
And that’s a bit of an irrational belief on your part.
You would have never invited her over, accepted her invitation, agreed to even meet with her if there was any thought in the back of your mind that she has any ulterior motives. In a weird twist of fate, you’re both kind of in the same position, the subject of all kinds of public scrutiny. Granted, from what you have seen on social media, majority of the people are on her “side.” Some going even as far as starting and using the hashtag #TeamJadah.
And you can understand that, understand why the public would “side” with the wife versus the mistress, but it’s also based upon a shit ton of Mariah’s lies and smear campaigns that have painted you in such an ugly light.
That’s ultimately why you’ve agreed to this, agreed to this highly uncomfortable team up, because it’s the only and best way to reclaim your voice.
To reclaim your narrative.
The sound of the doorbell ringing literally makes you jump from where you sit criss-crossed on the new expensive ass sofa Joe picked out for the house. It is comfortable though, and for a second, you almost choose to stay in the comfort of the sofa versus answering the door.
But, you know that’s not an option, for Jadah to fly out on such short notice only to be stood up by the other woman.
It’s not a good look.
Clearly.
So with a deep breath and quick mental pep talk, your feet carry you to the door that you unlock and hesitate only a second before opening.
Instantly, you’re hit with two things: the sweet smell of Jadah’s perfume and Jadah herself. Right off the bat, you can’t get over how gorgeous she is. Her deep complexion is absolutely flawless and moisturized as hell, thick eyebrows that frame her almost slender facial shape perfectly. Full lips pulled back into a sly smile. She’s wearing a pair of jeans and thin sleeved top that show off her shape, both slim and thick where it counts. 
She’s as drop dead gorgeous as you imagined her to be. You can’t be attractive as Joe is without someone to match your aura. 
“Well, let no one say Joe doesn’t have good taste. You’re even prettier in person.” 
Receiving compliments from your boyfriend’s ex-wife was also nowhere on your 2024 bingo card, but clearly all projections need to be discarded at this point with how many stunners have happened.
“Thank you.” It’s strange. You’ve always been super good with compliments, taking them at face value, because you know that you’re pretty, always having the high self-esteem to recognize as such. But, hearing it come from her of all people feels a little…..off. Like, she shouldn’t be complimenting you. “Umm, come in, please.” 
She does so, walking and looking around, almost inspecting. “This place is beautiful.”
All of the compliments are throwing you. It’s not what you were expecting. Then again, you’re not sure just what you were expecting. 
“Thanks. Do you…want some water or something?”
She shakes her head, “I’m good, thank you.” Jadah gestures with a manicured finger between the kitchen and the living room. “Preference?”
Shaking your head, you leave that up to her. “Whatever you like.”
She nods and heads into the living room, sitting down on the sofa where you just sat, anxiously awaiting her arrival. Wordlessly, you follow suit, sitting on the sofa opposite of her. 
“Thank you for agreeing to this,” she says, placing her purse on the coffee table. “I know me reaching out must have taken you for a loop.”
“A little.” A lot. But, she doesn’t need to know that. “I—I can understand why. I’m so sorry you got caught up in all of this.”
“One thing you don’t have to do is apologize. For any of this. For anything. From what Joe told me, this girl is just psycho and has some weird obsession with trying to ruin your life.”
Scoffing bitterly, you can’t find a point to disagree with. “That sounds about right….”
No one says anything for a good, solid minute. Or two.
“Okay, why don’t we get the awkward part over.” Her voice takes on a new tone, one similar to boredom and insouciance. “We both dated and slept with the same man. I happened to be married to said man when you started sleeping with him, but that shit doesn’t even matter, cause you already know what our deal was.”
The deal…..
No, you have no idea what the deal was. That’s part of why you’re happy to finally be talking to her, because you have so many questions. Granted, that’s not the reason she’s here in the first place but still.
Your facial expression must give away the confusion because Jadah’s indifferent tone shifts to something else, something more serious. “Y/N…..how much do you know about my marriage to Joe?”
It’s a bit difficult for you to navigate how honest you should or shouldn’t be with her. She’s a stranger for all intents and purposes, but given why you two are now even sitting across from each other, maybe honesty is the best option. “He’s never really said anything about you or his marriage, and I won’t lie to you, it’s not like I’ve made a lot of effort to find out.”
There’s a part of you that still struggles with a level of guilt for the intentionality you had at the beginning of dating Joe to not ask about his wife, to pretend that you didn't see the wedding band on his finger.
Avoidance makes justification a hell of a lot easier. 
She chuckles, gaze settling on her lap. “I shouldn’t be surprised. Joe’s always been a good man. He was probably trying to protect me, protect my privacy.” Jadah shakes her head. “The irony, huh?” She leans forward, hands on her knees. “Alright, we’re doing this.” She seems to be speaking more to herself than anything, and you get it fully. You’re still giving yourself mental pep-talks just sitting across from her. “I’m gonna tell you the truth about us, but I’m telling you now, certain things Joe, even with how much he clearly loves you, may never talk about. Really, it’s years of therapy that’s why I can talk about it now.” On one hand, the warning is appreciated. On the other hand, it only increases your anxiety at whatever you’re about to hear. “I also have this thing where I use dark humor to cope with heavy shit, so just pretend like you don’t notice.”
The conversation with Kaylah in Vegas returns to the forefront of your mind, and you start to feel bad for opening the door for Jadah to have to revisit a clearly painful past. But before you can protest, she starts sharing.
“Joe and I met in college. I was 20, going on 21, and he was 22. He was playing football, I played soccer. I thought he was attractive and vice versa. We had a class together, and I approached him first. Next thing I know, we’re fuck buddies. It wasn’t romantic. We didn’t go on dates. He didn’t want that, and neither did I. It was just sex.” She says it so simply, so casually, and for a second, your mind goes towards comparisons. That’s kind of similar to how it was with you and Joe at the beginning. Just all about sex.
“Well, like two dumb college kids, we were having unprotected sex, and we both know what can happen there. I ended up getting pregnant. And this….this is where shit gets bad, because both his family and my family were of the belief that because we were having a child together that we should get married, so guess what we did?” She rolls her eyes, leaning back into the sofa. “I think that might have been our first mistake.”
A mistake….
Joe has also made a comment at least once or twice insinuating he viewed the marriage as a mistake. Had stated they initially married for the wrong reasons, and hearing the full story, you sort of agree. 
It’s such an outdated belief that two people need to be married in order to have a child.
“We did it, we got married. My family is in real estate, so we moved into an apartment they owned off campus and prepared for the baby. That was really the only time we talked and interacted. When it had something to do with the baby. And looking back on that, I can see now that even if we wanted it to work, it wouldn’t have. I felt nothing for him outside of the fact that we were having a baby together, and I know he would say the same because we discussed as such when we finally decided to get divorced. But, I’m jumping ahead of myself.”
Slowing down would be wonderful, because this is a lot for you to take in and digest. Jadah sounds like she’s essentially stating she never loved Joe, never had feelings for him. And it seems like he felt the same way, like they were only trying to make it work for the sake of the baby and their families.
She’s quiet for a second, and you already know the next thing that’s about to come out of her mouth. “There’s—there’s no easy way to say this, so I’ll just say it.” Another pause. “We lost the baby. I–I had a stillbirth. I was just about 8 months along. I—grief is so damn weird, because some days I’m okay, and then others, I feel like it just happened.”
Shaking your head, you advise gently, “Jadah, you don’t—”
She lifts her hand, stopping you as she explains, “today….today is an okay day. I’m….I’m good.” And you hope, for her sake, that she’s being honest with both you and herself. The last thing you want is to unintentionally trigger her. “We coped the only way we knew how at the time: avoiding each other and having sex when we weren’t avoiding each other. Both of which were unhealthy, one of which resulted in me getting pregnant again. But, I—I ended up miscarrying.”
That….that you especially weren’t expecting to hear. The loss of one child seems unfathomable, but the loss of two children is just so wrong. Like, it shouldn’t be allowed to happen. No one deserves to experience that kind of grief, and while your heart aches for Jadah, it’s hard not to think mostly about Joe.
To think about how that kind of experience had to have torn him up. How could it have not?
“After that miscarriage is when we tried to make things work, tried to actually be a real couple. It was mostly on my end but also that loss was the first time we actually tried to heal together instead of separate. I did most of the initiating, and I can be honest with myself now in admitting it was mostly because I wanted to try again. I wanted to try to have another child.” Her attention is mostly focused on her lap as she recalls what had to have been one of the most difficult times in her life. “Through therapy, I learned that I thought if I could finally just have a child, my grief would go away. Obviously, that’s not how that works, and I learned the hard way because I did get pregnant again, but I….I also ended up miscarrying again.” 
Words. There are none to properly describe what’s going through your head right now, the emotions all circulating throughout your entire body. Tears brim your eyes listening to this heartbreak. You have such a tremendous amount of compassion and sympathy for the woman sitting across from you.
For the man not before you currently but you’d give anything to be able to hold and hug right now. You had no idea he’s been through so much, lost so much, and yet he still stands tall, forever being your backbone.
Being your saving grace. 
“That was the last time Joe and I were ever intimate,” she continues, dabbing at her eyes. “He refused to touch me unless I got on birth control. Said he didn’t want to see me go through that anymore, and I believe him. But, I also don’t think he could handle another loss either.”
You’re not sure anyone could handle that kind of loss a fourth time. 
“I was the one who cheated first, but it’s hard to call it that when I nor Joe ever really saw our marriage as real. It was legal, yes, but he never loved me, and I never loved him. We had love for each other, but we weren’t in love with each other. And I think the little we did feel was because of our shared losses.”
This almost feels like a discussion that needed to happen in separate sessions, because it’s so much to take in. You’d always wondered about this marriage, wondered what the real story was, but hearing that real story almost has you wishing you would have never asked. It’s just all so heavy.
“And then he started becoming more famous and up there in the WWE. I don’t need to tell you how crazy his schedule can be. I barely ever saw him. We essentially became roommates. He did his thing and who he wanted, while I did my thing and who I wanted.”
It’s hard on you hearing all this, for obvious reasons, but there’s also a part of you that is grieving for different reasons. Grieving what maybe you and Joe could have been if you knew all of this. Knew his wife wasn’t the high school sweetheart turned wife, knew he wasn’t going home and playing house when he wasn’t in your bed. You always just assumed this was the case, the few times you even allowed yourself to think about him being married. It was more toward the end of your relationship as you realized you needed to start being honest with yourself about your relationship with him.
“I know for a fact Joe never initiated a divorce because he felt like it was wrong. Like it was wrong for him to leave me because I couldn’t give him what he wanted, a family. I can’t speak for him, but I’d bet that’s why he didn’t divorce me even when he met you. Because he’s a good man who still felt a sense of loyalty to me because I had tried to give him a child. I just….I couldn’t.”
Your chest tightens at her words. Did she just….. “Joe wanted kids?”
Jadah is quick with the response, reiterating. “He always wanted to be a dad. Even with our first pregnancy, we were both nervous and young, but he told me that he wanted a big family because he came from one.”
It’s getting harder and harder to keep the tears at bay. You hadn’t the slightest clue fatherhood was something Joe always envisioned for himself, something he always wanted. It makes sense, it makes all the sense now why he reacted so strongly as he did when he found out about Callie. The way he looked at you with such love and appreciation on Christmas when you apologized for not getting him anything, the way his eyes fell on Callie is he calmly told you that you already did.
A child. 
You’d given him a child, something he always wanted but could never have.
Shaking your head, you admit aloud but gently, “I didn’t—I didn’t know that.”
“Do you know what Joe told me when we finally realized we needed to just file?” She doesn’t wait for a response, most likely already knowing what your answer will be. “He said he was never supposed to be with me, because he was always supposed to be with you.” A tiny gasp leaves your mouth. “And he’s right. Joe never spoke about me the way he speaks about you, the way his eyes light up, the smile on his face…... He was never in love with me, because his heart was always supposed to be with you.” Any effort to refrain from crying is null and void. “And I’m happy for him. I truly am. I couldn’t give him what he wanted, and that’s okay, because you have.”
Her comforting you is the last thing that should be happening, but it’s exactly what occurs. She reaches over, placing her hand on top of yours.
“Y/N. I don’t hate you. I don’t think you’re a whore who ruined my marriage. That marriage was a sham from the beginning. If anything, I was more upset at you when Joe told me about Calista. I was upset because I wish you had told him from the beginning that you were pregnant. We could have gotten divorced sooner, and he could have finally experienced fatherhood. I could have finally figured out what I want in life.”
Sniffling, wiping at your eyes, “All this time…..I thought that I had been that woman, that I took him from you. That’s why I didn’t tell him about Callie, I thought—I felt like it was wrong, wrong because he was married.” It’s that along with your unaddressed daddy issues, that whole trauma, but while Jadah is relatively open with you about her struggles. You’re just not there yet.
“You can’t take what never belonged to me. I’m able to admit now that I never had Joe, and to be honest with you, I never really wanted him.” She frowns almost, continuing to share more with you than you ever expected her to share. “I wanted to do humanitarian work after college, and I didn’t do that because I was too busy living my life the way everyone said I should. I don’t blame Joe either. I guess I just wish all three of us didn’t have to wait so long to finally have what we wanted.”
In a strange sort of sense, all three of you are victims of some type of circumstances, different in various ways but still victims. 
“Are you….are you happy, Jadah?”
In all that you’ve heard her divulge, a no wouldn’t surprise you. She’s such a strong woman, but in the midst of all this, you getting Joe, Joe having you, where’s her happy ending?
“I’m bisexual.” It’s such a strange first initial response, one that you’re not sure how to reply to or take. Not that you’re judging at all. Good for fucking her. But, where is the relevance?  “It’s not a secret, either. I’ve been out since I was in middle school, but I’ve been in a relationship with this amazing woman for almost a year now, and it’s with her I’ve realized I just tend to form deeper connections with women than men. Especially emotionally. It’s gotta be why I never felt anything for Joe, because we both know that man is objectively gorgeous, insanely sweet, and the D is fire.”
That makes you laugh, the first in the midst of this heartfelt conversation. “You’re not wrong about that.”
“But, she’s amazing, and we’re so happy, so yes, I am more than happy.” Her eyes light up the same way you’re certain she’s seen with Joe when he talks about you. “But, you know what will make me happier?” She announces with attitude and determination. “Getting on Live together and blowing up this bitch whole spot.”
Another laugh that’s followed up with. “I’d rather beat her ass, but this is second best.”
“I mean, we can do that too. I don’t really know how to fight, but I’ll cheer for you on the side.” 
There’s more laughter as you realize Jadah has that dry sense of humor that can have you dubbed over in tears from the humor, meanwhile she’s got a straight face the whole time. 
“I wish, but I can’t be fighting in my condition.”
It leaves your mouth before you even realize what you’re basically confirming, and before you can freak out, scolding yourself for being so insensitive, Jadah is already two steps ahead.
“Seriously? Congratulations!” Her smile is just as genuine and happy as all the outdoors, as she explains. “Y/N, just because I can’t have kids doesn’t mean I can’t be happy for people who can. I know Joe must be over the moon happy.”
“He is,” you answer with a matching smile, hand going to your stomach. “I’m really happy I got to meet you, Jadah. I think….I think we both needed this.”
There was something so healing about all of this, some sense of solace and closure that feels like it’s been provided for the both of you. Her being able to talk this out and be honest about her feelings, and you learning that maybe, just maybe, your relationship with Joe was never wrong in the first place.
Because it was always supposed to be.
“I agree.” She squeezes her hand. “Now, let’s get started on our strategy for this Live, cause I’m ready to shut that ex best friend of yours fifteen minutes of fame down.”
———-
In another life, you and Jadah could have been the best of friends. 
There’s such an ease that comes with talking to her. Not only is she just as laid back as Joe promised, but the bitch is funny as hell. The strategizing your game plan for the Live is filled with her dry humor that almost has you in tears at one point. And it amazes you how someone who’s been through so much can still find it in her to laugh, to still be filled with so much joy.
It’s admirable. 
And maybe there’s a way where you can be friends of some sort, because there’s truly no ill feelings towards her on your end. You’re also almost certain it’s the same for her as well, but right now, the focus is on this Live. 
Well, sort of.
“I definitely think the cool tones will really compliment the white theme of the house. You guys don’t plan to paint, right?”
Joe never mentioned that Jadah is an interior designer, not that he needed or even had a reason to, but it definitely comes in handy considering you have this big ass house to decorate without a lick of knowledge about decorating. 
It didn’t take long to figure out how you’re going to tackle the Live, and you two even got your iPad set up in the kitchen, deciding that’s where you would hold it. She even set up the practice live so you two could familiarize yourself with the layout before actually going live.
So with that out the way, it only took one question from Jadah about designing for her to be assisting you with some options for different rooms in the house.
“No. Joe hasn’t mentioned anything about it.” You then remember. “We are getting a mural painted in Callie’s room. I guess Joe knows someone.”
“Oh, that’s awesome.” She beams, asking, “what’s the mural gonna be?”
Smiling, you answer, “disney. She loves Disney.”
“Y/N…..do you….do you think I could meet her?” She quickly adds, almost as if she’s nervous about even asking in the first place. “I know you probably need to talk to Joe first, but—”
“Of course, you can meet her.” There’s no need to think about it, no need to talk with Joe about it. “I was actually going to ask you if you wanted to meet her. She’s out with my best friend right now, because I didn’t want her overhearing our Live, but I’d love for you to meet her.”
She seems so moved and appreciative of this. “Thank you.” She motions down the hall, “you don’t happen to have any food, do you?”
Laughing, you answer. “Girl, I was just thinking we need to get this Live done, cause I’m hungry.”
It’s not too surprising on your end. In the past few days, you’ve noticed your appetite increasing, a strange symptom to have so early on in your pregnancy. Annoying, too.
“Well, let’s pig out on snacks, and maybe we can get actual food later,” she suggests. You’re down for that, thinking about asking Alexis to stop and pick something up on her way back to the house with Callie. 
“Sounds good to me.” She then looks around, noticing the speakers located throughout the house. “Do those work?”
Already knowing where she’s headed, you pull out your phone, opening up Spotify and reaching it to her. “What’s the vibe?”
Jadah sucks her teeth, taking the phone. “Girl, you already know.”
She moves her fingers around the screen before music starts to play.
Knuck if you buck boy
Knuck if you buck boy
Knuck if you buck boy
“Oh my god, you taking it way back.” And it’s so appreciated, cause this always has been and always will be your song. It’s aptly appropriate as well.
“We gotta be in the zone.” She’s dancing along the way to the kitchen, tossing you your phone as she walks backwards. “You still remember Princess verse?”
Is water wet? “Don’t play with me.” Making it to the kitchen, you’re barely able to open the cabinet where the snacks are before the verse starts.
Yeah we knuckin' and buckin' and ready to fight
I betcha I'm'a throw dem thangs
So haters best to think twice
Word for word, you don’t miss a beat, and Jadah is right there with you, dancing and playfully twerking to the soundtrack of every middle school fight back in the Y2K era. 
The two of you share a laugh at your silliness as she forages through the cabinet for her preferred snack while you open the goldfish and glance at the iPad. Frowning, you move closer, asking, “why is the screen still on? It’s supposed to be on auto—Jadah?”
She’s distracted, caught between Cheez-Its and Pretzels, answering distractedly. “Yeah?”
“Why does this say we’re live?”
At your question, she answers half-heartedly, “it’s in that practice mode thing, isn’t it?”
That would provide a heavy layer of relief if your eyes didn’t land on the number of the corner of the screen.
The number that reads over 100,000k people are currently watching this live.
“Jadah! It’s fucking live!” She spins around, confused. “Like, we’re on Live!”
“Oh, shit,” she curses, running over and also looking at the screen. “Damn, we are.”
Panicked, you back up to the opposite counter, lecturing, “I thought you said it was in practice mode!”
“I thought it was!” She defends, shrugging and reminding you of her naivety with technology. “You should have never left me in charge in the first place! I haven’t used social media since Tom and I were besties on MySpace!”
“Oh my god.” your hand remains over your mouth as you take in the fact that this thing has just been sitting here, live for the whole wide world to sit and watch.
“I don’t know why there’s so many people here. Were ya’ll just sitting here staring at her fridge?”
“Jadah.”
“It’s a valid question!” She sucks her teeth, pulling out the bar stool and plopping down. “Well, since everyone’s here, we might as well get started.” She reaches for your phone, simply saying “music.”
Believing she’s going to turn off Crime Mob, you hand it to her, but that’s too good to be true. Because instead of silence, you’re hit with Megan Thee Stallion.
I just want to kick this shit off by saying, "Fuck y'all!"
I ain't gotta clear my name on a motherfuckin' thang
“Jadah!”
“I said we were getting started. We need to set the tone.”
“We can’t be playing this kind of music on Joe’s account though.” At least, you think so. You’re not entirely certain what exactly his public image is supposed to exemplify. But, songs about fighting and cussing people out don't seem to align.
However, she waves you off, focusing on the screen. “Hello, everyone, and welcome to this special edition Live. I’m sure most, if not all of you, recognize Y/N, thanks to a basic bitch we’re about to roast alive in this here video.” She gestures to you, and unsure of how exactly to respond or act, you simply offer a sarcastic wave. “But most of you may not know I am because I’m pretty sure there’s only a couple of photos of me online, which is the way I prefer it.” She places one hand on her chest. “I’m Jadah, the infamous ex-wife who apparently hates Y/N and pulled up ready to knuck if you buck, but we’ll get into that later.”
Feeling more comfortable after making active efforts to push away your nerves, you tease, “bet ya’ll didn’t see this one coming.”
Jadah’s face lights up with a mischievous smile. “We figured there’s so much being said about us by this delusional bitch, that it’s time we speak our truth. And I’m just gonna say right now that while we’re doing this to clear up the lies, there are some things we’re not going to touch on because it’s nobody’s business.”
“None of this is really anyone’s business,” you add, the confidence growing by the second. “It’s all really fucked up how we even have to come up here and defend our characters and talk about personal, real life situations. I never wanted any of this, never wanted to have my face be out there, to have my daughter’s face be out there.”
“And that’s the thing, too,” Jadah seems to be feeding off your energy just as much as you’re feeding off hers. “I don’t have any social media at all. I hate it. After today, I don’t plan to ever do anything like this ever again. But, it’s also the fact that people are saying such cruel things about an innocent child that absolutely disgusts me. Like, people are attacking an innocent little girl and saying that it’s in defense of me, which is so insane because none of you know the truth.” She looks over at you, asking, “mind if I start off?”
“No, go ahead, please.”
“Bet.” She claps and announces. “I’m gonna keep this super easy for all of ya’ll. First things first, I have never spoken to that Mariah person a day in my life. Have zero clue who she is. The texts? Never happened. Phone calls? Never happened. Screenshots of said messages? Never fucking happend. Why?” Jadah makes a triangle over her mouth so her voice projects. “Because I don’t fucking know her!”
“More facts: Joe and I were married, yes. We got married when we were like 21 and 22 because I was pregnant, and that’s when people still believed children could only be raised by married couples. That’s the only reason I married that man. We were never in love. Never even dated. We were just horny college kids who didn’t use protection.” 
As strange as it may be, you can tell there’s a bit of hesitation on Jadah’s end before she goes into the next part. “We, unfortunately, lost that child. And experienced some other forms of loss that I won’t get into because it’s very personal, but to make a long story short, we ended up having an arrangement. Essentially, he did what and who he wanted, and I did the same.” 
She pushes some of her hair back, continuing to explain bits and pieces that are still true but protect her from having to lay out her darkest experiences. “I don’t even consider it an open marriage, because outside of us legally being married, we never had an actual marriage. As most of you already know, professional wrestlers have insane schedules, so when I tell you he was at the crib maybe a month out of the year? I’m not even exaggerating. That man was my platonic roommate.”
There’s a small smile on your face as her humor and sass melt into her delivery after carefully maneuvering around the specifics of her personal loss. “Ya’ll are all up in arms, coming after this girl talking about she broke up my marriage, blah blah blah. But, she couldn’t break up what didn’t exist. I never loved that man. Joe is a great guy, but we never loved each other.” She gestures to you with her thumb. “This is who he loves. This is who he has a family with. And the fact that ya’ll can sit there and claim to support him and be a fan while attacking the people he loves blows my mind.”
“So, it goes without saying, Mariah lied her ass off about all of that for clicks and views. She’s a liar. And you can print that in your tabloids.”
“I also wanna clear up some things about her if that’s cool with you?” Jadah nods, and motions for you to have the figurative floor. “I need people to understand that this is somebody who I thought was my best friend, who I’ve called a best friend since I was in kindergarten. Matter of fact, we met because some boy was picking on her, and I went up and pushed him, standing up for her. I’ve always prided myself on being a loyal friend, especially to her. So for her to do all that she’s done to me has been so fucking hurtful and confusing.”
“I found out that she’s been sleeping with my very first boyfriend, the boy I lost my virginity to and dated on and off up until I was in my mid-twenties behind my back since we were teenagers.” You have no intention of stooping to Mariah’s level, but if she wants to lay out your information for public scrutiny, then you damn sure can make sure they know just who they’re believing. Know her character, or lack thereof. “Mind you, he ain’t shit either and he can go fuck himself just as much as she can. Like, it takes two, but here I am calling this girl my best friend, crying and confiding in her about all he’s putting me through, and the whole time she’s fucking him behind my back.”
“That’s so foul.” Jadah looks just as disgusted as you feel just thinking and talking about it. 
“But you know what? As fucked up as that is, that part is well with my soul because I have a man who treats me so damn good, a beautiful daughter, and a loving, supportive family. So, that’s fine. What really fucks with me though, still—” There’s an unplanned pause as emotions get the best of you, just revisiting this subject. “Fuck, I said I wasn’t gonna cry.” Taking a deep breath, you do your best to continue without breaking down in front of the whole damn internet. “What gets me is that this girl who I considered a sister, who I literally made the legal godmother of my child, called DCFS on me, made up horrific lies and stated my child was in immediate danger—”
“Oh my god—”
“They took my baby away from me and placed her with my mother, so I legally could not have any contact with my child or my mom for three days. And that may not seem like a lot of time to ya’ll, but I love my child. She’s very attached to me, and I’m kinda the same. So those three days were torture. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t keep anything down, my chest hurt. I had to hire a lawyer, be interrogated like I’m some criminal. It was awful.” Your attempts to hold back the tears failed epically, and Jadah’s hand is on the small of your back, rubbing in a comforting motion. “And now she’s sold all these personal photos and videos of my daughter to the highest bidder, so now I worry about what kind of fucking disgusting perverts now have access to them. It’s been fucking hell dealing with girl. You all have no idea.”
Up until this point, you’ve made an active, concerted effort to keep your eyes away from the comments, not wanting to lash out or be unintentionally triggered. But, an accidental glance reveals a slew of incoming comments including hearts of all colors. 
It’s then you can’t help but to read a few, also needing to get your shit together. Crying on the internet is something you used to make fun of people for. Now, you’re in the same position.
The comments are a complete 180 from the last time you decided to torture yourself by viewing the public’s general opinion on you. 
There’s a tremendous amount of sympathy, support, and newfound understanding. For both you and Jadah, though, the majority of them seem to be aimed towards you.
A lot of apologies as well.
“And this is the kind of person you all have been deceived by. The only thing she was truthful about is that yes, I met Joe because of her. She won a contest years ago that gave her tickets and backstage passes to a Smackdown show, so she invited me, and I met him that night.” That’s probably the only thing you could ever be grateful to Mariah about, the fact that her letting you be her plus one resulted in you meeting the love of your life. “But, I’m not a whore. Not a golddigger. I’m very intelligent. I got nearly a perfect score on my ACT and my SAT back in high school. I was student body president, homecoming queen, prom queen. You look up Ms. Popularity, and you’ll see my fucking face. I have a bachelor's degree in education, I’m a licensed teacher in my state. Like, I don’t need attention from strangers nor do I want it.”
“And here’s the thing, my daughter is almost five, so I’ve been in the picture. If I was this big attention whore like she says I am, why have I not gone public or made my presence known? The only reason ya’ll even know who I am now is because I was essentially outed, but I don’t want this shit. Joe is famous. Not me. I don’t want that. I just want to live in peace and privacy with my family. That’s all.”
It’s a bit of playing with the truth, insinuating that you’ve been in Joe’s life consistently the past five years, but that’s one of the parts of this that doesn’t need to be shared on the world wide web. 
“We black and educated excellence over here. We don’t need validation from strangers.” Jadah says it better than you can as you continue to blot at your eyes, grateful the tears are drying up. “We need some church in here to lift the spirits.”
“Oh, Lord, what are you going to play now? We are about to get Joe’s account banned.”
She clicks around on your phone before the song starts playing.
We lift our hands in the sanctuary.
We lift our hands to give You the glory.
“You’re so stupid.” This laughter is so good for your soul, it’s the most you’ve done in such a short span in a while. And it feels good. “But why would you pick this damn song, knowing good and well it never ends.” Reaching for the goldfish bag on the island, you open and grab a few. 
“Y/N! Why are you eating? We are in church.”
You give her that ‘girl, please’ look, justifying. “Girl, I’m hungry. It’s snack time, shit.” You’re craving more than a snack, more like a full course meal, but Callie’s snacks will have to do for now.
“Now you’re cussing in church. Don’t drag me to hell with you, whore.” She leans closer into the phone, taunting, “you liked that one, didn’t you, Mariah?”
You almost spit out your food. “Jadah!”
“What? You are a whore. That’s why I pulled up at your house blasting Sideline Hoe by Monica in my 2007 Toyota Camry, wearing my Baby Phat bomber jacket to fight you that one day.” At this point, you’re about to piss on yourself. Jadah’s sense of humor is golden, because she’s saying all this with such a straight face. Never once breaking scene. 
You decide to play along, correcting. “No, it was The Boy Is Mine, remember?”
She snaps her finger. “That’s right. My bad. And then the second fight, it was Jolene. I played that when I snuck in your hospital room at Grey Sloan and caught you flirting with Dr. McDreamy.”
Turning your head, you try your best to hold in your laughter, but it’s impossible. 
And Jadah also breaks a bit, speaking to the phone and viewers. “You see how ridiculous and stupid this all sounds? That’s exactly how stupid majority of the shit that came out of Mariah’s mouth is. I literally just met Y/N for the first time today, this morning. And as ya’ll can clearly see, we good over here. She got her man. I have a wonderful, beautiful girlfriend. Stop being so invested in lives you don’t live.”
You start to add something else when Jadah interjects, “and let me just say this, cause I saw some people having the audacity to say this girl is ugly. Ugly where? The bitch is gorgeous. Look at her!” She gestures to you, adding, “she’s stacked in the front, and it’s sitting in the back. Shit, I would hit that too.”
“Girl, you better stop before they start making up rumors and shit about us all being poly.” Snickering at just the thought alone of that being the latest on the rumor mill, you jokingly coin it prematurely. “Roman’s Harem.”
“Roman’s Hoe House,” she suggests, and you’re nearly in tears from laughter. This bitch is hilarious. “Plot twist, everyone. This was all a publicity stunt for a new season of Flavor of Love featuring Roman Reigns.”
“Jadah, oh my god, stop.”
She lifts her hands to silence you as you lay your head on her shoulder, laughing your ass off. “We will be taking applications following this Live. If you are a woman of color with ass and boobs, please apply. Slim thick girls, ya’ll can apply too with the understanding your chances are a bit slimmer. No pun intended. Skinny girls….maybe try the Bachelor or something.”
“Jadah, you are a menace.” You are dying for her to meet Alexis. They seem very similar in a lot of ways, and it seems like they’d vibe well. Hopefully.
“Y/N, please, I am trying to build recruits for the harem.” She finally cracks, shaking her head and leaning forward to read some of the comments. She then asks you, “should we answer questions?”
That’s an easy pass, though you also know this is your one chance to really show who you actually are versus who you’ve been painted out to be. “Sure. A couple.”
Jadah gets to reading, “uhhhh, okay this one is tame. What’s the sexiest thing about Roman?”
“Jadah, how is that tame?”
“You should have seen the other one,” she mutters. Something tells you that it’s better you didn’t.
“All of him. That’s such a generic, basic answer, but it’s the truth. He’s the full package. Tall, handsome, amazing body. Insanely kind.” Big dick, not that that needs to be shared with the whole world. “I will say though, like, seeing him parent our daughter, how good and patient he is with her. That is immensely attractive. Him being such an amazing dad and partner. That shit is sexy. If you’re grown, you agree with me.”
“You better be grown if you’re watching this Live.” She’s not entirely wrong. Jadah then reads the next one. “What’s something most people don’t know about Roman?”
Looking over at Jadah, you ask, “do you wanna….”
Immediately, she’s shaking her head, admitting, “I don’t know him well enough to really speak on that. Like, we knew each other better in college, but obviously who we were in college is vastly different than who we are now.”
It really does stump you to hear her say that aloud, not that it upsets you, but just the mere fact that you spent so long viewing her relationship with Joe in one way, but in actuality, they were more strangers than anything. 
Strangers only bonded by loss.
“Ummm, a lot, actually.” You finally answer, trying to figure out how or even what to share. “He’s actually very quiet, like, borderline shy. At least when you first meet him. Once he warms up, you see more of his personality. But yeah, it’s fascinating how well Joe encapsulates Roman cause they’re totally different people.” You glance at Jadah, murmuring, “maybe one more.” 
This Live has gone on long enough, and you feel that you and Jadah touched on all the points you wanted and needed to address.
She nods, clearly searching for a good final one. A couple seconds later, she reads aloud. “What’s one thing you’d like to say to Roman’s fans?”
Damn. 
What a final question.
There’s a couple seconds you utilize to gather your words, wanting to articulate effectively and clearly. “That regardless of how you feel about me, please don’t let that change how you viewed him before you even found out I existed. Joe—sorry—Roman, no, fuck that. Joe is so damn passionate about what he does, his work is everything to him, and he does it like he does everything else in his life—with full passion and dedication.” Your eyes are starting to water again from unexpected emotionality. “I’m so proud of him and all he’s done and accomplished, and I know it’s just the beginning, so I’d love for you to continue to support him on his journey.”
“Damn.” Jadah mumbles after a minute of silence. “That was deep. We need another song—”
“Jadah, I swear to God, if you play one more song—”
“You’re going to like this one!”
“I think we’re just about finished anyway.” It’s not a think. It’s a know. Callie’s been gone long enough. You miss your baby. “What—”
Roman’s theme song plays louder than the previous songs Jadah played, and a smile is instantly on your face. “Okay, you were right.” The two of you vibe for a minute, because your man’s song really is an actual vibe.
“Alright,” Jadah laughs. “You all have been a wonderful crowd now, but we’re hungry, so we’re gonna go eat—what are you thinking?”
“Hmmm, maybe Chinese?”
“Good call.” She then focuses on the screen again. “We’re gonna go pig out, listen to some more amazing music and….yeah.” Jadah grabs you and pulls you right next to her, so you can say something too.
“Thank you for listening to our side, the truth, and please be kind. To everyone. Not just the people you know.”
“And don’t forget to send in your applications for—”
“Jadah!”
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ariesmoontarot · 4 days
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The Honest Truth
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Hey everyone I hope you’re having a good day! So this reading is going to be different from my usual readings. I’m going to channel what the collective needs to hear without a specific topic being in mind. Take it how it resonates and leave what doesn’t. Enjoy!
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choose a number from 1-3 to pick your pile.
The Piles:
💙Pile One:
I feel like things are happening around you that are changing you as a person. Your whole life could be changing in every aspect and I just feel like there is something you’re questioning. You feel confused and doubting how you feel in this situation. I’m seeing a heavy heart. You feel overwhelmed, exhausted, & burdened by a situation you feel betrayed in. I feel like something happened that made you feel like you were left for the wolves and it’s pushing you to pull yourself together as best as you can. I see you trying to create a feeling of stability and independence but it’s been a hard and long journey to get to where you are right now and you’re doing it! Slowly but surely. All things come around in full circle. What you give is what you get and maybe you gave time, effort, and energy to a situation that didn’t happen the way you wanted, but it’s happening in the right time in the way that it’s supposed to. I feel like you’ve blocked someone or something from being able to reach you. You’re protecting yourself and standing on business. I feel like you aren’t letting anything or anyone affect the ambition and goals you have in mind no matter how much it hurts. You’re learning to have healthier boundaries and I feel like for a lot of you there’s a person you felt connected to emotionally and they could have lied or moved a certain way that inevitably made you feel the way you do. You’re questioning on whether or not this person or connection is really for you. I feel like things didn’t seem to work out for you guys because of the way they approached you. I feel like they let their fears and pride get in the way of things and they self sabotaged. They know going about things the way they do isn’t going to work with you and I feel like you’re upset with them. You’re a little mad to be honest. I feel like you’re giving them the silent treatment and completely closed off now. I see they do have feelings for you and you make them really happy. They feel emotionally invested with you and they want to try and come together to make things work, but it’s taking time and I feel like they’re procrastinating not taking any responsibility or steps to come towards you at all. They’re just sitting on how they feel and not expressing it. I see them trying to approach you with this opportunity to try again for something long term and it took a lot for this person to come towards you. They had to let go of alot of things and I feel like they are trying to feel confident with their approach. Something blew up in this persons face and I feel like it was the fact that you went ghost on them. You simply withdrew yourself and went your own way. I see them looking at the situation with anxiety and fear because they know they’ll be losing a good person if they don’t get their act together. I feel like right now you’re just focused on loving yourself and life. You have this lighthearted energy where you aren’t letting things really get to you. You acknowledge the uncomfortable feelings and keep it moving. I feel like you’re disappointed and hurt but you just keep it moving with this “naive” attitude. It’s not like you’re giving them the benefit of the doubt, but you’re definitely just acting ignorant like you don’t know the gameplay. You know things aren’t fair right now and I feel like you’re aware of everything that’s going on. You’re just observing and paying close attention to all the details. You’re watching them too, maybe on social media or something but however you see them you’re definitely gathering up all the facts and evidence needed to back up how you feel without it actually being said to you. It’s like you’re listening to your own truth and accepting how you feel for what it really is. It’s up to you what you want to do with the information you find, but I see a lot of you are about to or already went hermit. I feel guided to tell you to pick another pile after this one if you feel like you should.
💙Pile Two:
Hi pile 2! I feel like right now you’re a bit disappointed and sad over some spilled milk. You’re feeling some guilt for doing what is best for you. I feel like you have all that you need to change your circumstances within yourself. You just need to be determined, patient, and willing. Good things really do take time. Trials and tribulations will happen and that’s just life. You don’t learn to appreciate the good if there is no bad. I see someone keeping a close eye on you. Paying attention and maybe talking about you. It doesn’t have to be bad talk though. I just feel like they’re seeing you do you and talking about it with people they’re around or close to. I see you feeling inspired by this disappointment though. The hurt is inspiring you to change and take control over what you can and that is yourself. You’re putting an end to this feeling of sadness and guilt and turning it into something positive. I feel like you’re not stopping your life for nobody. You keep it pushing even when it’s hard to. You’ve grown so much as a person and I feel like this situation is only pushing you to do even better than you are! You aren’t waiting for anyone to come and save you or be the person that you need. You’re definitely giving someone the cold shoulder and letting them watch you. You don’t necessarily need anyone, but when a person is getting your time, care, and efforts I feel like you aren’t going to just let them walk all over you and not hold up their end of the line. You have standards, morals, & integrity. I feel like you don’t like the unnecessary drama or chaos and if someone is disrupting your peace you will gladly cut off all communication with them. I see you confidently enjoying yourself and resting assured all things will happen the way they should. You’re letting your actions and effort lead you and having faith that you accepting things and letting them just happen will align what and who is really meant for you. I just keep getting this energy of “wait for me”. I’m not sure who is wanting this but someone definitely is. Someone who loves and cares about you, but can’t give you what you need right now in whatever way that applies to you. They’re trying their best to hold onto you and not let you go. Even if it’s just watching you, not saying too much or anything but putting on this front like as if they’re fine. They’re being lighthearted and cold at the same time. It’s like they’re being really quiet not saying much, but definitely feeling a lot of emotion without letting you see too deeply. They know if they get too close they will fall in love with you. For some of you this could be a friend or someone you have history with. This person is up in their head not trying to say anything because they’re afraid or they feel like they just can’t do much because of where they are right now. They want to take the lead and you follow, but I feel like they need to come up with a plan or take the extra mile in order to even get to you because I don’t see you settling. You feel like the situation itself is too much drama and conflict. It’s a bit triggering for you because I feel like you’ve grown past all that type of energy. You’re completely blocked off to this person and I feel like they feel it. They know you shut them out of your life and it took a lot for you to do that as well.
💙Pile Three:
I feel like you’re working on multiple things in your life right now and one of those things is a connection you have with someone. I feel like you were offering your love and care to this person and they broke your trust. You feel like you lost your energy to even try anymore and the situation has gone draining and more of a setback than it is benefiting you. I feel like you just want things to be balanced and reciprocated, but instead it feels like you’re the only one trying and you’re tired. I feel like you don’t want to fight for this anymore. This person unexpectedly felt something for you and I feel like they didn’t feel prepared at all for that. They feel this calling to just hold onto you and not let you go. They keep trying to put in bits of effort to hold on to the connection but I feel like because of the way they’re showing up it seems like they don’t feel for you at all. They seem distracted or a bit closed off emotionally and it’s because they’re afraid of opening up. For some of you they’re afraid of their feelings for you. You might be wondering why this person keeps in contact with you at all but it’s because they feel like they need to take their time with things and be patient with the way things are going. You don’t want to go with the flow when you don’t know where that river leads to. I’m hearing “this is getting old” and “reaching for the stars”. I feel like you’re tired of the same old story and excuses. It just feels like this will never be good. You can feel that way or this person does. I just feel like the energy is giving pessimistic hopeless romantic. Feeling like there’s no hope of this ever working out and I feel like you’re ready to just move on and keep it pushing. You’re not dealing with inconsistent and immature behavior. This person isn’t on the same level as you emotionally and besides all the surface level and physical stuff, deep down they’re struggling. They don’t know how to handle their feelings and I feel like they may run from them. I’m getting a lot of messages about the ocean and water so emotions are definitely a big factor here. It feels like you were building on an unsteady foundation and it was almost as if you stepped into a building that was inevitably going to fall apart and the minute you stepped in it crumbled. That’s how this person heart feels. It’s like the minute they got too close things just started coming undone. I do see you speaking your mind to this person and being completely honest about how you feel and I feel like you told them what you needed and wanted out and it made them realize they want the same things their mind is just at war with their heart. They aren’t saying much to you and I feel like they could just be ignoring you and not saying anything at all because they know you just want nothing but clear and direct communication. You want everything straight forward and I feel like your standards are high so you aren’t accepting less than. You’re very intelligent and I feel like you see through any situation that seems unclear. You know the minute you’re being gaslighted or manipulated and I feel like whenever you start to second guess yourself and what you feel, you know something is up. You know this person isn’t quite sure on how they feel and I feel like you accepted what they gave you and ran with it. In the sense that you let them do what they want to do and you just observe and move accordingly. Either way you’re gonna do what’s best for you. This person is separated from you by fate. I feel like there is distance between you and it could be a lack of communication, physical or emotional distance, or all of the above. This is happening so they can understand things by themselves. They know deep down how they feel and it’s up to them whether or not they want to accept it. I don’t see you waiting around though. You’re doing what makes you happy and I feel like being stuck and confused is something you’re definitely not about to do and they know this because of what you said and did. You said what you said and you stand on that.
You meant everything you ever said to them and I feel like when you walked away they realized how serious you were. I seen something that said “If a woman likes you enough you don’t even have to lie to her, she will lie to herself.” Some of you could have been lying to yourself giving this person the benefit of the doubt, but then you decided you couldn’t do it anymore and just started being honest with yourself. Of course you don’t have to be a woman but generally speaking. This person could’ve been in another situation before you, that didn’t work out and maybe they seen a good opportunity with you just to have a person like you around. They could’ve attempted to fill the void that they feel with you. However, they underestimated you. But I just hear “I’m not dealing with this” from you and you walked away. Completely cut off contact and went about your life as you should. I just feel like this person feels stuck and that’s something they’re gonna have to figure out.
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astropookie · 1 year
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astro observations that i founded in my notes
*birth chart placements
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star dream
taurus moon: they’re so CALM and so comforting. my histrionic energy 🤪 at first didn’t understand but just accept it. Sometimes I have the urge to smack them or shake their shoulders so they can “wake up”. They seem high, in a way they seem to accept things as how they come -but I really doubt it- (it’ll resonate more on the ones with mercury 12H at pisces degree) -I only know them for like 2 weeks-. THEY LOOK SO FUCKING COMFORTABLE OR CALM. When they’re panicking they don’t rise their voice BUT I’ve seen another taurus moon with a lot of cancer and Leo placements that’s the total opposite - I wanted to point it out bc it surprised me how tf they look so in tune with everything but at the same time their expression say otherwise-. UPDATE: she left. And that makes me wanna point out another thing. (she also has a pisces rising) —->
Pisces risings ALWAYS -idk how to bring this up- make their actions seem irresponsable or the situations they go trough are really unexpected. The other day, out of nowhere, a friend disappeared and told me she wasn’t going to stay. She didn’t specified anything. Too suden. They act or -I want to believe- their life makes them take decisions that can seem irresponsable, impulsive or egoist. I knew her for fourth weeks and then she disappeared, not specifying what was the situation. Everyone was asking me what happened and she left me the weight? the responsibility of telling everyone something I couldn’t tell (bc she told me it was a secret and I didn’t told them exactly). My ex best friend is a pisces rising and he always made decisions that affected not only him but their loved ones in a devastating way. He always passed the barrier of limits only bc he wanted and he could. He knew how much weight the situations held and even knowing that he minimized them. I’m not saying every pisces rising is like that. BC THEYRE NOT. Don’t generalize or take my observation as a way of justifying others actions. It’s complex. That’s based on what I observed, it’s completely subjective. So pls don’t take advantage of this and benefit yourself to hate on others. UPDATE: She changed careers, to major in communication to medicine. THAT’S A WHOLE CHANGE. SHE JUST TOLD ME. (with majority of air elements)
I’ve noticed that pisces risings are always questioning if they look good physically. They ask “Do I look good?” and if you say yes, they’ll be like “What do you mean that I look good? Specify. Do I look good meh or do I look good good?”
If you order an Aquarius and Capricorn prominent person, they will not do what you ordered them. They don’t like to be told what to do, to not be able to process and question that order and simply bc you’re telling them what to do, you’re demanding them. They only can do THAT -order people-, if you’re not informed 🙄
oN tHE otHeR hAnD, if you order a Sagittarius prominent person to do something they will not do it but not bc they’re mad at you, like the case of Saturn rulers. No, they’ll not do it. They’ll joke about it and ignore it bc they don’t feel free, to not be allowed or able to choose and the most important thing: bc they can.
The life of people with Venus 7H turns around relationships, romantic relationships? A really lovely friend I have always suffer bc he gives too much of his energy on relationships, friendships, every type/aspect. He came out of his almost 2 years relationship -he was very mature about it, also he was really broken when it happened obviously but he knew how to overcome it and im proud of him 😭-, now, time have passed but not too much -I’m not judging him. I didn’t thought about it till now, 3-2 months😟🤪😚- and he already told me he is starting to like someone and that he kissed her and I’m proud of him BUT HOW TF YOU LIKE SOMEONE SO EASILY AND START SOMETHING WITH SOMEONE IN A ROMANTIC PURE WAY. IM LITERALLY SAYING ROMANTIC BC HES REALLY LOYAL, ALWAYS THINKING TOO MUCH ABOUT THEIR PARTNER/LOVED ONES ETC. I FUCKING BLOCK ALL MY FEELINGS LIKE HOW DO YOU ENTER A SOMETHING SMOOTHLY WITHOUT KILLING YOURSELF THINKING THAT YOU CANT HAVE CONTROL OF THE SITUATION OR AAAAAAA
I think I know why my friend with scorpio moon don’t like my other friend with moon and mercury 12H. Scorpio always likes to control the situation, what’s happening, to know everything and to everyone to know nothing but what they want others to know -except for their loved ones?no-. 12H is synonym of “hidden”, they always hide something…-traumatic- that a scorpio may find it often uncomfortable. Why? They don’t know what’s happening easily, they know the other is hiding something. They can’t control it. They have to make an effort. They don’t like when people on purpose hide something. Scorpio moons are intuitive ASF. They don’t like your fake smile. My scorpio moon friend told me “I don’t like her. She hides something” and yes, my mercury/moon 12H friend does. She is always smiling and daydreaming, she’s not direct. She told me about her past situations that were certainly traumatic, there were a lot of changes in her life and my scorpio moon friend knows she hides THAT something.
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❀ Based on my personal experience and what I’ve analyzed in my surroundings.
❀ English is not my first language.
❀ I’m not a profesional astrologer.
Thank youu. baibaiii🫣🫶🏼💋
Do not copy. Please give me credits.
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miheartsedthings · 7 months
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All The Lovers in the Night
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“Smells like rain.” 
Billy glances from the movie he’s watching to where you’re leaning on the window sill, your nose nearly pressed against the screen. 
“Hm?”
It’s cool out, early spring. 
“Rain,” you say again, “C’mere.” 
Graduation was months ago, and since then you and Billy spend as much time as possible together. Now, you’re at his place while his dad is away on a business trip. Susan doesn’t stand in the way of you being together, as long as you all have some idea of which friends Max is hanging out with. She’s with Lucas and the others, so you and Billy have the house to yourselves and you’ve taken up in the living room. 
You’re on your knees in front of the window beside the TV, transfixed by the little green yard and the trees just beyond. All settled under graying clouds. Billy comes to stand beside you. 
“Smells like…” he pauses, leaning down and closing his eyes. He’s been so at ease since his dad left. Since his ribs healed and the nightmares lessened. So much more thoughtful. More like his true self than he ever would’ve been before. 
“Kinda like ocean.” He says as he looks out. He’s smiling but only with his eyes. 
“Yeah,” you say, taking another big inhale. “Wet dirt, and like…” another breath “the way it smells on foggy mornings, ya know?” 
He nods. He sits down on the hardwood, one knee bent as he reclines on the opposite arm. 
“You’re missing your movie,” you say. 
His eyes are far away, looking out into the sky. 
“It used to be quiet in our house when it stormed,” he says. “My grandma lived with us and she used to make me and my mom huddle up in the living room and pray until it passed. Normally, my dad bitched about everything that woman said, but…when it stormed, something came over him, too. Everything would just get mellow and we’d sit there…damn. I forgot about that.” 
A cool, damp breeze rolls over you, and slowly a shush drums up from the ground as the rain starts to fall. Quietly at first, and then louder, filling the air with scattered water and the sour smell of soil. Billy loops an arm around your waist and pulls you into his lap. He tucks his face into your neck and kisses the chilled skin before returning his eyes to the window. You settle into him, closing yourself into the warmth of his arms. 
“There’s so much I wish I could change about what happened to you.” 
Your words feel thin. Maybe they’ll slip right out the window and be trampled by the rain. Broken through like butterfly wings. 
“I know,” he says “I know what you'd do for me if you could.” 
His arms tighten around you, somehow bringing you closer to his chest. You know the words are meant to be comforting, but they make you feel powerless. You sit there drowning in all the nothing you can do to fix the things he suffered with. Before you know it, you’ve sniffled, and he turns you to face him with a hand under your chin. 
“Hey,” he says, his face tightening into a stern glare. “You don’t get to be mad at yourself about shit you can’t change. Remember we made that rule?” You nod, but it only makes it worse that he cares so much. “Keep being a crybaby you’re gonna get yourself in trouble.” 
A laugh bursts out of you, regardless of your tears. He’s able to make you laugh whenever he wants, it’s like some weird superpower he has. He smiles a little and kisses you, letting his lips linger. 
“Don’t worry,” he says. “You can’t have more regrets than me and shit…I’m here.” 
You’re flooded with more words, more sentiment than you’d ever burden one person with. It’s too much. So you kiss him again and try to telegraph it all through the dense space between your internal self and his. You try to send him healing and care. Compassion beyond description. Forgivenesses not yours to give. All of it. Everything. 
For a moment, when he’s filling you, you think he feels it. By some miracle of the body and the sound of rain, he finally feels how much you love him. You’re so happy you could die. 
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Artist Credit: Cécile Berrubé
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luffyvace · 8 months
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BSD character’s reactions to screwing up they’re first date with you ( T_T)\(^-^ )
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Includes (most) the ada and port mafia <3
they’ll be pretty short since it’s a lot of characters :P (these exclude kyoka, Q and lemon thing aka kajii)
ADA
Fukuzawa 🗡
he’s probably slightly embarrassed but knowing him I’m sure it wasn’t too bad of a screw up
in fact it was probably a minor embarrassing moment that happened
it was silence for a split second before you two changed subjects from what happened
the date went pretty smoothly after that
the typa detail that gets left out when you talk about how the date went
Ranpo 👓
he’ll probably realize what’s gonna happen to ruin the date before it does, and either act to make sure it doesn’t
or smoothly addresses it and moves on
just cuz he’s like that 😎🤷‍♀️ (LOL)
but if something he doesn’t predict happens that crashes your date he’ll be pretty butt hurt
like? How come the worlds greatest detective didn’t see through this??
🙄
you likely end up assuring him it’s fine and continue the date
he sulks and eats snacks when he gets home
your probability of still going on the next date anyway is 89% but he’s still mad that happened
Yosano🥼
she will be pretty bummed out and will starting drinking wine mid date
she may ask if you want some
she’s not sulking or anything but if like where y’all was gonna go is booked/closed you end up just going to some open public area and talking
about how this sucks, what you’ll do next date, if you can do something last minute, that you both doubt you’ll try and go there for a date again and eventually to lighter topics like your hobbies n such
but yeah the date decently recovers
kunikida🤓
YOU ALREADY KNOW THIS MAN IS UTTERLY ENRAGED
in all seriousness he’s s t r e s s i n g
he kinda panics because he planned this out so perfectly and now it’s ruined??
over course he has a back up plan down to z but it’s was supposed to go PERFECT.
(if dazai ruined it for you two he’s gonna choke him out as soon as he sees him)
eventually he stops mumbling and pacing and just takes you to plan b
which actually goes really well!
thankfully it ended in his favor but he’s still gonna spend everyday of his like repenting his first date
because you were his first date with anyone ever
and it was….spoiled. 😀
Dazai💀
you already know mr. slick bounced back immediately
like he went “oh well” and took you to do something else without batting an eye
made it just as fun as the original activity was gonna be
you’d think he had a plan b in mind but he indeed did not
he just had the money to make it look like it 😉
smooth operator 🤪😚
Tanizaki😅
apologizes like a million times
he didn’t mean to ruin it!!
especially if this is your first date too
cuz this is definitely his seeing as though Naomi won’t let him date nobody else 😃😅
(you only got away with him bc Naomi likes you /j)
you guys probably end up walking around and get some ice cream
sitting on a bench and talking
a cat came up to you two and you pet them
All in all it ended peacefully !! <3
(he sulked to Naomi but was grateful things still went alright)
naomi💗
she went “awwww” 🙁
you all likely end up in a arcade and eat some snacks too
You guys use the money you were gonna spend at the original place
it still ends up being pretty fun but you can tell she’s bummed out
you give her a kiss on the cheek at the end of the date to make her feel better 💖
(she immediately perks up)
Kenji🐄
he was kinda like “that stinks” but didn’t even seem sad about it
you two rerouted but couldn’t find anything to do
so you pretty much ended up wandering
not either of you mind, passerby we’re really kind to you and gave you free stuff
At least you didn’t leave empty handed 🤷‍♀️😋
atsushi🐯
your his first ever date- canon.
so when he realizes he (wasn’t his fault but he feels like it anyway) blew it, he’s utterly disappointed
he explains this is his first date and he wanted it to be special, even more so since it was with someone so cool like you
you hear him out, patting his back and giving him head pats to make him feel better
he even went out of his way to buy some new clothes 😞
you tell him it’s okay but he doesn’t feel that way
he asks if there’s anyway he can make it up to you and insists to buy you something before you go
he gets you something you picked out from a shop
although he’s practically hyperventilating over whether you’ll ghost him or not since he screwed it up
PM
Mori💉
another smooth one
i doubt whatever store/place you were trying to go to was closed because he could just pay to open it back up
so it’s likely something embarrassing/awkward happened instead
HE PROBABLY TOOK ELISE AND SHE SAID SMTH 😂😂😂😂
anyway
if so he immediately corrects her then deactivates his ability……
he wanted her to come on the date so he could take her in the future and have you be used to it
clearly that talk he had about not saying private stuff went in one ear and out the other
he apologizes for whatever inconvenience happened and does what every rich man does :)
throws money at the problem :)
no fr y’all went to every shop and he bought you what you wanted from it
(Hey just the for the record I don’t condone mori’s behavior and i genuinely don’t know why the creator did that—they coulda just left that out he coulda been so much better🧍‍♀️)
Hirotsu👔
he doesn’t let little things bother him, but a date with someone that’s important to him?
and it gets ruined??
now that’s kinda disappointing
he formally apologizes and asks if there’s anything you have in mind or like to do for compensation
or maybe if it’s not that drastic he’ll just apologize and try to direct the conversation else where
he isn’t sweating it or anything but the blunder was a pain for a hot second
either way he gets through it without letting it stop the entire date as a whole
Koyo👘
is really embarrassed for 3 hot secs before she collects herself, sighing
Is blushing a bit when she asks if your upset and apologizes
she likely planned this date and told you not to worry about it because things like this wasn’t so supposed to happen
luckily for her she switched from her original idea to something else, so now that that hasn’t worked out she can go back
from there the date returns to smooth sailing
she spoils you and tries to get you forget as much as possible
she especially doesn’t want that getting on her reputation if you work at the PM as well
Chuuya🥂
really irritated and swears under his breath while facing away from you
tries to make it look like he has it under control but he’s kinda freaking out
he liked you so much he really wanted this to go well :/
In the end he can’t think of anything and ends up muttering an apologizing before suggesting to go get some wine together
gets even more embarrassed if your not a drinker
he’s mentally slapping himself at this point
you probably end up pitching in and throwing an idea out there yourself, to which your idea works and the rest of the night is really fun! ;3
he keeps mentioning how good your idea was because it totally saved him
He’s happy when he walks through the door of his place, but when he remembers he blew it he gets upset again
spends the rest of the night drinking and thinking about it hoping you still wanna date him
Higuchi🔫
she is a lover who wants to do everything for the one she loves
so finally landing a date with you and blowing it is like her whole world exploding 💥
she becomes frantic in apologizing asking how to make it up to you
even if it was just a minor thing
if she can turn things around she still feels successful but makes precautions not to let that happen again
if not she’s totally bawling her eyes out to gin about it
she does her best to get on your good side before asking for another date
Tachihara⚔️
gets a bit flustered and sheepishly looks at you to see if it bothered you
his reaction depends on yours
if you start complaining about how much of a bummer it is he’ll start to feel bad
he tries to cheer you up and suggests to move to something else
but if your calm n cool about it so is he
he kinda shrugs one shoulder and says “so what now/wanna do somethin’ else instead?”
Akutagawa🧥
*coughs*
”err..guess the place is closed. I checked yesterday and they were open so this must be a fluke..”
he probably awkwardly stands there from there
if your response is too negative he’ll apologize for wasting your time and offer to drive you home
he will likely hesitate before asking you on a date again and makes sure everything is perfect this time
”curse the weretiger” (you hear him mumble this like it’s a swear word before you close the door to your house)
If you don’t mind as much you two will probably just end up chatting somewhere
it ends with him apologizing anyway
(say you enjoyed talking with him and you might be met with wide eyes and a little blush on his face <3)
Gin☺️
blushes, stammers and apologizes like crazy
she feels really ashamed since this is your first date and something went wrong
she covers her mouth with her hand to sort of “hide” out of embarrassment
she even took off her mask and dressed up all cute for you!! :(
luckily! She brought you a gift !
you ended up really liking it and you hugged her for it, which made her feel a bit better
you ask to return the favor by buying her something too
she insists you don’t have to but you end up doing it anyway
you wrap your arm around each other’s waist while you walk which was pretty romantic :)
you kiss her atop her forehead before separating to head home
(if your not in the PM or can’t physically hand yourself—she probably follows you home from a distance, BUT NOT IN A CREEPY WAY. In a ‘she wants to know your home safe’ loving way)
she squeals when she gets home and tells ryuunosuke about the highs and lows of your date 💗
yes as I said pretty short but these were mostly a trial run for fun :)
again this is just me branching out and expirmenting ;P hopes to you enjoyed!!
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