#i love every ridiculous version of this cheer costume

[jamespotterthefirst]

October 31st (Ethan x f!MC)

Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Lilac Allende) Word count: 2.3K Warning: Language Premise: Ethan Ramsey doesn’t do costumes... except maybe for her.

A/N: A pointless Halloween fic

A/N2: For Day 28 of @choicesoctoberchallenge2020​. The prompt is “Costume”.

1. Intern Year

Ethan resisted a groan as an atrocious, remixed version of The Monster Mash blared through the speakers, eliciting a cheer from the drunken crowd. Characteristically, he pinched the bridge of his nose, eyes shut as he wondered why he decided to venture out on the worst night of the year. Perhaps he needed a drink that badly after another full day of dealing with interns.  

“Time for a refill, Dr. Ramsey,” a voice said over the music.

Ethan hated the way his pulse quickened at the sound.

Doing his best to appear collected, he shot what he hoped was an impassive glance at the figure now standing beside him at the bar, the floral notes of her perfume already caressing his every sense. One single glance at her, however, was enough to shoot all efforts of appearing aloof straight to hell.

She leaned casually against the bar, clad in a sensuous, forest green number that molded to every curve of her body and ensnared every bit of his attention. Dark green leaves embellished every surface of the sinfully short dress, tapering off into delicate, curly vines along her exposed shoulders and arms. Her glossy, dark hair was hidden away beneath a cascade of long, auburn waves that made her eyes appear greener still.

“Wig,” she explained with a small laugh when Ethan continued to stare.

At last, he pried his eyes away, feeling his neck flare with heat. Unsure of what else to say, he feigned indifference as he asked, “And what are you supposed to be, Rookie?”

Aside from fucking irresistible, his idiotic, addled brain added on impulse.

He could see Lilac's jaw go slack in a way that was almost comical but somehow managed to be entirely too adorable.

“You're kidding, right? I'm Poison Ivy.”

Ethan had known that. He had been, after all, a comic-book obsessed teenager once. If someone had told him back then that he would one day witness the sexiest version of the character imaginable, his head would have caved in on itself. Adult Ethan, it seemed, was no better because his eyes fell on her once again, unable to resist her magnetic pull.

Lilac, however, was too busy looking at the dancefloor. She nodded toward her group of friends, dancing, laughing, and contributing to half of the noise in the bar.

“We were all supposed to be Batman villains but Bryce and Landry got lazy. They put on a Thing One and Thing Two shirt and called it a day.”

Ethan followed her gaze to where the young surgeon had peeled off the aforementioned shirt, relishing in the attention that decision was earning him from a gaggle of girls nearby. The other one Lilac had mentioned stood awkwardly off to the side, too pale and and gangly to ever be Lahela's counterpart.

“More like tweedle dee and tweedle dum,” he muttered.

Lilac met his eyes at once and to his delight, she laughed, the sound sending his stomach into a dive. It was already maddening enough that the sound was entirely too attractive, but Ethan felt a swelling sense of satisfaction at being the one to inspire it.

When she sobered up, her green eyes remained on his, humor melting into a pensive expression. She continued to watch him with the conviction of someone discovering a new secret. He would have given anything to know what she was thinking at that very moment.

“What about you?”

“Hmm?”

He had been distracted by her full lips and by how fitting the damn costume was. Much like every weak-willed man in his comic books, Ethan would have risked absolutely everything to kiss her.

“No costume?”

“God no,” he spat, inspiring another little laugh.

“Never say never,” she told him in a sing-song voice.

“I can confidently say never.”

______________

2. A year later.

They paused outside the door to Bryce's apartment, the muffled sound of music and laughter making its way to the hall. Ethan briefly wondered if his neighbors would complain enough to derail the whole affair. It would mean he could go back to the peace and quiet of his home.

As if reading his mind, Lilac turned to face him, a knowing smile pulling at her lips. God, he loved it when she looked at him that way.

“You're not getting out of this,” she reminded him, her fingers moving to play with the orange Ascot tie she had forced him to wear.

“We're well into November. There was no need to dress up.”

As usual, Lilac rolled her eyes lovingly.

“It's hardly dressing up when all we did was put you in a white sweater you already owned, babe,” she explained for the hundredth time. Ethan tried to scowl at the pet name, but he was beginning to enjoy it. Instead, he relaxed into her touch, trying his best not to follow the lazy path her fingers made on his chest. “You wouldn't even wear a wig, so it doesn't count. As for the party being this late, it was the only night we all had off. And we'll be damned before we let a whole year pass us by without dressing up.”

She finalized that sentence with a searing kiss to his neck. His hands banded around her waist reflexively, pulling her soft body flush against his. In their time together, he had avidly learned the many ways to drive her just as crazy.

“You and I can still dress up,” he murmured darkly against her ear.

Lilac shivered, to his immense delight.

“Are you suggesting role play, Dr. Ramsey,” she returned in a poor attempt to mock him.

The formal mode of address, uttered in a low, breathy voice against his ear, made his blood buzz for her. More maddening still was the short, purple dress she wore along with the auburn wig that made a reappearance after a year.

“Got a thing for redheads?” she asked, correctly guessing the contents of his thoughts yet again.

Ethan smiled crookedly down at her. “I got a thing for you.”

The words rang with sincerity and an overwhelming sense of relief at finally being able to say them out loud, without any fear of consequences.

Lilac, for her part, looked as though she wanted to shove him against the wall and kiss him fiercely, but the erupting cheers from inside the apartment interrupted their exchange from advancing further.

“Mystery Gang in the house!” Bryce, dressed as a pirate, hollered as soon as they walked through the door. Everyone else cheered and hooted, the sounds no doubt fueled by the contents of the many red solo cups around the room.

“You guys look adorable!” Sienna commended over the music, greeting each of them with a friendly hug. “Fred and Daphne makes so much sense for you two.”

“Because we solve mysteries for a living?” Ethan asked, voice deadpan.

“Nah, because those two were a thing long before any of the others found out,” Elijah said as he joined them.

Lilac laughed out loud, the sound teetering on the edges of relief. She had been nervous, just like Ethan had been, that her friends would be awkward around them now that they knew of their relationship.

By the way they easily joked with him and included him in conversation throughout the night, their concerns had been for nothing. They even helped Lilac pressure him into dancing a modern pop song he had heard many times on the radio. Not that he needed much convincing when he would gladly do anything just to see her radiant smile directed his way.

By midnight, the party had dwindled down to drinks and board games. There was a raucous consensus to play Clue, which caused Bryce to roll his eyes.

“Of course the diagnosticians want to play the nerdiest game.”

Ethan rolled up his sleeves in preparation, which earned him a coy and borderline lustful look from Lilac. “You're just bitter that we're playing something other than beer pong, scalpel jockey.”

Elijah let out a surprised yet impressed laugh, wasting no time to high five Ethan. Even Bryce couldn't help but grin.

“Trash talk all you want, old man. I'm more than just a pretty face.”

When it came to Clue, however, Bryce had no chance against Ethan, who analyzed every player with sharp precision and correctly guessed the murderer, the room, and the weapon. Several games later, Ethan easily proved victorious while Bryce only laughed graciously, raising his palms up in defeat.

When even the board games ebbed into quiet conversation at the end of the night, Lilac sat on his lap, circling her arms around his neck. They sat like that for minutes, enjoying the nuances of being that annoyingly cute couple at a party.

“Thank you for dressing up for me,” she said as she pressed a chaste kiss on his cheek.

Even that sent his heart into a tumultuous rhythm.

“Only for you,” he murmured. “And as a one time deal only.”

______________

3. Many years later.

Ethan plastered the fur-lined hat on his head, a perfect complement to the fur-lined everything else he was currently wearing. Luckily, fall time in Boston was cold enough that the ensemble would prove to be practical as they walked the streets. He stepped into the hallway, not bothering to check his reflection. There was no doubt he looked utterly ridiculous.

But he didn't care.

He would do anything for her and for the unbridled joy in the eyes he loved so much.

Lilac was already waiting when he entered the living room, her smile impossibly wide as she glanced him over. It was the exact reaction he expected and he couldn't help but grin too.

“Is this how it's supposed to look?”

“Yes!” she all but shrieked in delight. The magenta cape of her costume fluttered behind her as she rushed to him, her body crashing against him in an overjoyed hug. “I love you so much for doing this.”

The words still sent a thrill through Ethan, as strong as the first time he heard them. Heart thundering wildly at his chest, he leaned down to kiss her, just because he could.

When they pulled apart, she watched him through half-closed eyes, her teeth catching her lush bottom lip. All Ethan wanted to do was carry her to their bed and tear off the costumes they had spent so much time perfecting. Inwardly, he marveled at how everything had changed over the years, but there were some things that remained the same.

Instead, he captured one of her plaits between his fingers. “These people we're dressed up as,” he started, gently trailing the ridges of her braid. Lilac watched him, captivated by his every word. “Do they end up together?”

She allowed a laugh. “We've watched nothing but that movie for a week straight.”

Ethan shrugged, allowing a sheepish grin. “I tune it out thirty minutes in every time.”

More laughter and Ethan decided then that he could hear the sound forever and not get enough.

“Don't let Dolores hear you say that,” she warned with one final kiss. She moved to break apart from their embrace but he stopped her.

His wife looked at him expectantly and Ethan frowned, suddenly doubtful.

“Do you think she'll like it?”

Lilac's curious expression melted into a fond smile. “She's going to love it,” she assured him, leaning in to press a sweet kiss on the tip of his nose.

Not surprisingly, Lilac had been right because moments later, a delighted shriek of laughter announced the arrival of their toddler daughter. Her godmother trailed close behind, crouching over in an attempt to fix the blue tulle that trailed along the floor as the child ran towards her father. It was futile and Sienna sighed in defeat, shooting Lilac an amused look.

“It's pointless,” Sienna laughed. “There's no stopping little Lolly when she sees her father.”

Proving that point, his daughter flung herself into Ethan's arms and cried, “Dada!”

“Hello, princess,” Ethan laughed as she pressed her version of a kiss on his cheek.

“I'm Elsa,” Dolores corrected sagely.

“Yes, babe,” Lilac added with mock seriousness. “You are in the presence of Queen Elsa of Arendelle. Have some respect.”

“My apologies, Your Majesty,” Ethan said to his daughter with such formality that the child laughed. Sienna watched the exchange with a watery smile, failing to repress a squeal.

A loud roar coming from the threshold informed them that their son had joined them. Sienna laughed as Jonah ran around the room, the antlers of his costume bobbing wildly as he moved. At last, he stopped right before Lilac, who picked him up in her arms.

“I didn't know reindeers roared,” she laughed, swaying her son in her arms.

Jonah roared again to demonstrate that reindeers could indeed roar formidably, at least when impersonated by a five year old. “I'm a Halloween reindeer,” he explained. “He roars to be spooky, but just for today.”

The adults laughed. “You're a good big brother, Jonah,” Lilac informed him with a kiss, closely followed by a tickle.

“Lolly wanted to be Elsa so bad so I wanted to help,” their son said through a giggle, as though it was the most obvious explanation in the world.

It was for Ethan.

As Sienna ushered them together for a picture, Ethan looked at his family, everyone smiling radiantly and far more beautifully than the moon itself. Little Dolores clung to him, laughing and looking happier than he had ever seen her.

His wife caught his eye and shot him a knowing but proud smile. Ethan knew she was remembering the cynical, jaded version of himself who had confidently proclaimed he would never do this.

Ethan had never been happier to be proven wrong.

______________

A/N: I HC they name their daughter after Dolores and nickname her Lola/ Lolly

Once upon a time I used to write for another pairing who canonically dies on Halloween. You have no idea how happy I am to write for a pairing who’s alive and well lol.

Thank you so much for reading! I love these time hop fics so much. I wrote another one for Ethan x MC a long time ago that I will publish on my birthday in November :)

Finally, Chapter 10 of the Pictagram is coming soon. It might be two parts... Yikes. Thanks for waiting so patiently for it! Life has been crazy over here

_______________

tags: @openheart12​​​ , @takeharryandgo​​​ , @trappedinfanfiction​​​, @aestheticartsx​​​, @aworldoffandoms​​​, @paulfwesley​​​, @myusualnerdyself​​​,  @rookie-ramsey​​​, @ohchoices​​​, @colossalpainintheass​​​, @enmchoices​​​, @i-bloody-love-drake-walker​​​, @choicesfanaf​​​, @openheartthot​​​, @octobereighth​​​, @nazarihoe​​​, @utterlyinevitable​​​, @kites-in-our-skies​​​, @maurine07​​​, @schnitzelbutterfingers​​​, @doilooklikeiknow​​​, @snesdudes​​​, @kingliam2019​​​, @perriewinklenerdie​​​, @cinnamonspongecake​​​, @choicesstan1​​​, @queencarb​​​, @ethxnrxmsey​​​, @missmiimiie​​​, @jens-diamondchoices​​​, @adamsdumortain​​​, @apphia12​​​, @kalogh​​​, @lucy-268​​​, @binny1985​​​, @queenbirbs​​​, @honeyandsunfl0wers​​​, @newcolonies​​​, @lilyvalentine​​​, @rigatonireid​​​, @interobanginyourmom​​​, @parkerattano​​​, @custaroonie​​​​, @nikki-2406​​​​, @lilypills​​​​, @chasingrobbie​​​​, @nooruleman​​​​,  @lonely-mxxnlight​​​​, @ruinedbypixels​​​​, @shadynaturehilariouscookie​​​​, @tsrookie​​​​, @mvalentine​​​​, @professorkingslay​​​​, @drakewalkerfantasy​​​​, @casey-v​​​​, @helloblueeyedcat​​​​, @mysticaurathings​​​​, @blossomanarchy​​​​, @thegreentwin​​​​, @togetherwearerapture​​​​, @rookieoh​​​​, @ramseysno1rookie​​​​, @rookiemarsswiftie​​​​, @natashajaniphil​​​​, @mysticalgalaxysstuff​​​​, @hatescapsicum​​​​, @choices-lurker​​​​, @kiara-36​​​​, @junehiratas​​​​, @danijimenezv​​​​, @macy-ray85​​​​, @adrex04​​​​, @canigetanawwjunk​​​​, @sanchita012​​​​, @overwhelminglyaquarius​​​​ , @scorpiochick8​​​​, @skylarklyon​​​​, @starrystarrytrouble​​​​, @mercury84choices​​​​, @drariellevalentine​​​​, @ethanrcmsey​​​​, @lion-ess24, @aarisa-frost​​​​, @kaavyaethanramsey​​​​ , @udishaman​​​​, @a-crepusculo​​, @quacksonlover​​

[espejonight28738]

Family Reuinion

A.K.A: Eurovision 2021 in the Nordic's House

You can also read it in Ao3

Pairings: None really, just some squint and you miss it DenNor and SuFin but can be read as platonic.

Iceland arrived to Denmark's house two hours before the Eurovision final began. He had wanted to come earlier, but he had been very busy in previews days and there hadn't been any earlier flies that day.

He let himself into the house with his own keys, and the moment he opened the door he felt the hit of the sweet smell of danish pastries being made. 

"Hej, lillebror. Had a good fly?" He heard Norway asking him from the living room.

Iceland sighted at the question, remembering the disagreement he and Mr. Puffin had before Iceland left his house.

Iceland walked to the voice, to find Norway in the largest sofa in front of the television, already in his pajamas. He had been here all week, with Sweden and Finland arriving on Wednesday.

The house was big enough for the five of them, seven when Sealand and Ladonia came along, to be without getting on each other's space, which was the reason Denmark hosted most of their reunions.

"It was good. Were you banned from the kitchen again, Nore?" Teased Iceland, knowing his brother couldn't help but eat whatever ingredients were at his reach, which lead him to be banned half the times Denmark baked.

"Not this time, I was waiting to give you your uniform," was the response Iceland got. Before he could ask what Norway meant, however, the nation handed him a sweater.

A greenish, bluish sweater. With a simple pixel-art drawing of his face. Like the ones from his entry.

"When did you even get this?" Asked Iceland, not sure if he should be annoyed or impressed.

"I have my ways, now go change."

"I don't see you with angel wings..." he complained, but still went to his room to change. The only thing more ridiculous than his brother's dress up games, were his methods of persuasion to make him play along.

He changed to the sweater and changed to the rest of his pajamas he had in his room before going back downstairs.

Finland was now sitting on the two-person sofa, also in his pajamas, no sign of any “uniform” to cheer for his country.

"Finland, you left me to be Nore's dress up doll by myself?"

"Hey, Ice!" Greeted him Finland, not answering to the accusation. "We missed you on Thursday's semi-final. Tanska would've probably been happy enough for you not to cry so much about not qualifying himself."

"He always cries," teased Norway.

"Mr. Puffin didn't come with you?" Asked Finland.

Iceland shook his head, already used to the aggressive behavior of the bird. 

"Are you really not going to go with me? You're supposed to support me, and you like Danmark's house," tried to argue Iceland.

"Your stupid song is lame, I don't want be associated with it," growled the bird. Iceland had been hearing this for weeks, apparently Mr. Puffin had strong opinions on how much better the entry from two years ago was to this one. "Tell Finland his entry is my favorite."

"We have matching sweaters, Ice!" Exclaimed Denmark. Indeed, they had.

"Uh, no. He didn't like my entry. He liked yours, though," said Iceland, answering Finland's question.

Norway and Finland nodded, already used to Mr. Puffin moods, even if just by second-hand anecdotes, as he still refused to talk in front of the other nordics.

"Iceland! You're finally here!" Screamed Denmark, coming from the kitchen to the living room, Sweden behind him.

"Hi, Dan–" He interrupted himself when he finally looked at the danish nation. "What the hell–?"

But the moments he took to formulate his thoughts were enough for Denmark to put the small pastries, which smelt delicious, on the central table and throw his arms around Iceland.

Iceland corresponded the hug automatically, already used to the nation's antiques, but his brain was still processing what he saw.

Once they finally got Denmark to sit down, they spent the remaining time until the beginning of the contest discussing other countries' entries.

Denmark was wearing the same sweater Iceland had, the one from his entry, just that his had the pixel-art of his own face. Once again he wondered how did Norway get not only one, but two sweaters for the final.

But that was not all, Denmark also had some cheap angel wings in his back, in behalf on Norway's entry, he guessed, and a leather bracelet with spikes, for Finland's entry.

"Where did you even get all of that?" Was what Iceland finally settled on after Denmark stepped back.

"Don't recognize your own wings?" Asked Sweden. Iceland looked confused for a second, before finally remembering he had used an angel costume for Halloween a few years ago.

He had gotten rid of the wings early in the night, as those were very uncomfortable, and he had left them somewhere in Sweden's place.

"If you don't remember," added Norway, "Danmark has the photos in the Halloween album."

Denmark's eyes shined at the idea, but Iceland grabbed him by the sleeve before he could go for the album. He had no wishes of relieving the most embarrassing costumes Denmark and Norway had gotten him into.

"And the rest of the... outfit?" He asked to redirect the conversation.

"Norge got both of us the sweaters, and the bracelet is from the things he keeps from his black-metal phase from a few decades ago." Denmark smiled with amusement, probably remembering said phase.

Even Iceland had a few photos from that one. It was a bit unfair though that Norway looked too good for them to actually be considered embarrassing photos.

"Nothing for Sverige?"

"He tried," explained Sweden, taking a seat next to Finland, "but the clothes aren't very exciting."

"I brought my swedish mini-flags," added Denmark, pointing to the lamp table next to the sofa where there were two small swedish flags.

Iceland nodded, deciding that all in all it was a very Denmark thing to do.

Iceland sat in on of the extremes of the sofa Norway had claimed, leaving the other side for Denmark. The danish nation went back to running around the kitchen, although Iceland couldn't tell what more was he doing, but he took the chance to whisper to Norway,

"You got the sweaters to cheer him up, didn't you?" 

Norway gave a self-satisfied smile, clearly proud of how well it had worked.

"I also got one each for the rest of us, we are taking family pictures on those," at Iceland attempt to interrupt, Norway raised his hand in a gesture to stop him, "and no, it's not a suggestion. Everyone loved the sweaters; we are doing it. You can go back to being a moody teenager after."

"I'm not a teenager," argued Iceland, but he left the 'moody' part out, knowing that was probably a lost battle.

"Sure, lillebror."

"I can't believe you didn't vote for me, Su-san, I'm divorcing you and taking Sealand and Hanatamago."

"We don't get a say at the jury vote," tried to argue Sweden. 

Every year someone had some version of that same argument, and Iceland was glad it wasn't Norway who started to complain how he hadn't gotten votes from the icelandic jury.

Iceland was feeling kind of smug about having been the only one everyone voted for, even if he didn't win in the end. Only for that we would complain just the minimum for the photos with the matching sweaters.

"Does anyone understand the jokes about calling my guy... Castiel? And saying something about some turbo-hell?" Asked Norway, interrupting Finland and Sweden's bickering.

Norway was leaning on Denmark's shoulder, but still wide awake and checking, Iceland guessed, social media on his phone.

"You don't want to know"/"Long story" Denmark and Sweden answered simultaneously.

Iceland couldn't help a small laugh at that, but that ended in him yawning, which apparently was everyone's sign to go to sleep.

They all congratulated Iceland for being the highest-ranked nordic of the year, so only after his obligatory line of hugs he could go to his bedroom.

He kept yawning on his way upstairs, and collapsed on his bed as soon as he closed the door behind him. On Monday he would have to fly back to his home, but after all these months barely seeing each other, Iceland just enjoyed the feeling of being asleep under the same roof as his family.

[feminaexlux]

Stronger

Hey hey hey welcome to Part 3 of Miraculous Leap (Part 1). Part 2 is 5 Minutes

Ending this year with Lukanette again! Hoping it brings good tidings for 2021 (better than 2020 that's for sure)! Happy New Year!

FYI: Dewey = Dominic :)

AO3 link!

⁂

Ladybug brushed away her tears and smiled back up at Viperion. "Okay," she said shakily, nodding to indicate that she understood. "Okay."

They were in the past, or at least they were currently occupying their past selves. Hmm, how long ago was this? Ladybug looked back down at her suit and it was that ridiculous basic-ass red and black polka dot version. She didn't even have her wings. Okay, that narrowed it down to… younger than 16?

Ugh, that sucked. No one in their right mind would ever want to repeat their awkward teenage years over again, but… as much as she loved Dewey and wanted him with her at least right now she wasn't feeling like she'd swallowed a basketball. And she currently didn't have any back pain, which was a bonus.

Tikki, I need my wings, Ladybug thought at Tikki.

Tikki sounded a little startled to be pinged directly like she just was. Oh… um… Okay, Marinette!

She suddenly felt herself being wrenched away from Luka by another person before her wings fully manifested. "H-Hey!" She yelled out.

Chat had pulled her behind him and was aiming his baton at Viperion. "Don't touch her, you jerk! What did you do?! Why'd you make her cry?!"

"Chat… wh-what?" Ladybug sputtered. She heard Viperion growling under his breath.

"Are you okay, Milady?" Chat called out over his shoulder. Oh God, not this phase. She saw Luka clench his jaw and fold his arms but otherwise he was remaining still. Luka was pissed at the way she was being handled but he knew better than to step in and make things worse… Though Marinette knew he had a limit.

Ladybug sighed. "Chat, I'm fine!" Of course Chat wasn't standing down.

"Here's what's going on," Viperion said, sounding clipped. "This akuma controls time. Its power is to swap someone from a different time period in their life to here. Long story short the Ladybug and Viperion here now are from the future. I'm from the future. She's from the future. We're from the same future, since your LB and Viperion got hit with the same blast. We'd both been… taking care of someone, and it was terrifying that he wasn't here with us."

Chat was taken aback and reacted like he'd just been slapped. "Who… Both of…? No, nevermind. You guys… don't look like you're from the future," he said suspiciously.

Viperion took a deep inhale and long exhale in annoyance. "It was a mental swap. Sorry. Should have clarified." Thank God her husband had the patience he did. But oh shit--

"V! 7 o'clock!" Ladybug yelled out, pushing Chat out of her way. Ladybug wasn't 100% certain Viperion had access to all of his abilities so she had started to get her yoyo shield ready. Viperion turned in the direction she specified and caught the blast before it landed, reversing time itself and pushing the blast back to its origin. Okay, that question answered. Viperion had what he needed.

"Wow! What was that?!" Chat cried out in astonishment. "Oh holy crud, Ladybug, you--you can fly?!"

"Chat! Focus! We need to take care of this akuma!" Ladybug called out. The sooner they finish, the sooner she and Luka can get back to… She snorted to herself. What an awkward time for her past self to end up in.

⁂

(Back in the future…)

"I can't believe we have 5 kids," Marinette started laughing. It… oddly didn't bother her all that much. After all, with a certain someone she had imagined having up to 3. 5… was… well, definitely way less believable, but it didn't bother her.

Luka looked a little embarrassed and took a drink of his water. He just shrugged and sat down on the floor next to Marinette, pressing his back up against the edge of the bed. "I didn't have a plan for anything," he said sheepishly. "Just me and my guitar for… ever, I guess."

Marinette blinked in surprise. "You never planned to ask me out?"

"Didn't seem like you'd be interested," he said, raising an eyebrow at her question. "I don't mean for this to sound bad but… I don't know how we got…" He gestured at the room. "Here."

It's 'cause he thinks you're in love with Adrien, duh, Marinette chided herself. But… but was she… really?

"Wait… where are… the kids?" Luka asked.

"With my parents," Marinette answered. "Seems like they all go over pretty regularly," she said, showing Luka her calendar. Every 2 weekends she had an event called "Kids @ T/S," with the alternate weekends being labeled "Kids w/Granarka." Well, that was extremely nice of their parents to take on… "We must like these kids if we wanted 5 of them," Marinette mumbled to herself. She opened up her phone's photos and looked through the albums.

She noticed that Luka had leaned in a little to look over her shoulder. "Sorry," he said, pulling back.

"No, they're… yours too," she laughed. She angled the phone so the both of them could see.

"Harmony" was the oldest at 9, the most recent video had her playing a yellow electric guitar and singing on stage by herself at what looked like a small café. There were so many pictures and videos of her at these showings, and in a number of them it looked like future Luka was just offstage cheering her on.

"Melody" was second oldest at 6, and it seemed like she was a little copy of Marinette herself. Marinette couldn't help but smile down at the photos of her future second daughter dressing up and posing in various costumes and placing scrap fabric pieces together on the floor in make-believe designs. Apparently Marinette would have a protégé to call her own.

"Hugo & Louis" were the twin boys, still toddlers at 3. They always had silly faces on in all the pictures Marinette and Luka scanned. She had a video of future Luka tossing both boys into a ball pit and them giggling like maniacs, enjoying the airtime and landing in an explosion of brightly colored plastic balls.

And finally, "Dominic" was an album full of sonograms. Marinette patted her stomach. "Well, hello Dominic," she said. "I wish we met under better circumstances. I hope you're alright."

There had been another album labeled "Us" that Marinette scrolled through. Stills of future Marinette and future Luka together at award shows or at fashion events. Selfie videos of them sending jokes to one another. Pictures of future Luka working in his studio or playing his guitar or hanging out with friends.

Future Marinette adored him. Every picture had him smiling back or pleasantly surprised.

One selfie from several months ago had him with his arms wrapped around her from behind, leaning down to kiss her shoulder as she held up 3 different positive pregnancy test results in front of the bathroom mirror. Future them looked so happy.

Suddenly an awful, sinking feeling hit Marinette.

"We're not going to remember this," she said to Luka, and it was something like anguish that made her voice sound so raw. "Probably? Sometimes no one remembers what happened when the Miraculous Ladybugs reset everything…" She saw his eyes widen. "I don't… This… I-I… I want to remember this!"

His eyes widened further in surprise as both eyebrows went up. "You do?"

"Yeah! I mean, look at us! We're so… so… Wait… do you want… all this?"

Luka looked somewhat incredulous. "You remember I had zero plans, right? I didn't think about dating or marriage or kids." Marinette felt like a balloon (pregnancy aside) that just got punctured. For some reason her heart ached. "I mean… I never figured I'd get anywhere with you past being your friend. I didn't think you liked me that way at all. This? All this," he pointed at the pictures, "wasn't even a possibility." He closed his eyes.

Marinette wasn't sure what to say.

"Wasn't before," he said quietly, after a few moments. He started staring off into the distance. "Now? Do I want this?" He dropped his gaze to his left ring finger, then back up at her. "Yeah. Yes. But I don't want you to start liking me because of this. Futures aren't ever set in stone." He stared back off into space. "Honestly I want us to forget this. It's nice. Really nice. And maybe it won't happen. It'd hurt a lot to know what I missed out on."

Oh. Oh no. She'd been doing the Chat thing where she was barreling toward a specific outcome without thinking about the process or journey. Luka was right. Maybe it wouldn't happen. Not without her taking honest stock of her feelings first.

Did she want… him?

"It's supposed to lift you up and make you feel stronger." Chat had done that for her once. Then recently it'd been more like "Don't focus on the bad stuff." That didn't stop the bad stuff from existing.

Adrien had done that for her when he said she was the "Everyday Ladybug." And then it felt that no matter what she did he kept getting further and further away. And Adrien hadn't reached back out for her to help close the distance.

"Sorry," Luka said, breaking her out of her thoughts. "Guess I'm just… worried."

Marinette looked at him. "No, you're right. It would be unfair if all I wanted was the result." She paused for a few seconds to think her words through.

"I'm not going to start liking you because we got to experience this future," Marinette began again. "I don't even know when it really started. I just know I already do. You've never made me feel like I was wrong. You've never made me doubt myself. You've never made me think for one second I'd have to watch the things I say and the things I do or pretend to be friends with the people who've hurt me. You've always let me be who I am."

He had turned to look at her, worry and concern etched in the furrows of his brows. But the edges had softened as she talked.

Marinette smiled shyly. "I know it's not going to be easy… and it's something we'll have to keep working on… but I'd like to find out how far we can go together." She held out her hand to him, palm up. "I want… us. An us… whatever it looks like in the end."

Luka searched her face for a few heartbeats and took a breath, seemingly content with whatever he found. He gave her a lopsided smile. "I want that too." He reached out and took her hand.

⁂

(The "past")

"Miracu--!" Ladybug was getting ready to launch her Lucky Charm up in the air when Chat stopped her.

"Wait! Wait wait wait. Please. Can… can I talk with you… in private? For a little bit, Milady?" Chat looked down at her pleading with his most pathetic looking kitten eyes and Ladybug sighed. She glanced back at Viperion, who cocked his head a tiny bit to the side and smiled.

Like Luka was shrugging a What can you do?

Marinette winked back a Won't take long, handed Viperion the Lucky Charm, and turned back to Chat. "Alright. The rules are I'm not going to tell you any details but we can talk."

Chat jumped over to another rooftop and down into the alley below, putting a few buildings between him and Viperion. Ladybug followed behind him, floating down with her wings. Chat leaned his back against the brick wall and folded his arms. "Did… I ever have a chance with you?"

Huh. Okay. Chat was more observant than she remembered him being at 15. "Hmm, yes," Ladybug answered. She knew who he was, after all.

"Then… I guess I screwed up," Chat said miserably. "I always thought we were made for each other, you know?"

"We might have been once," Ladybug said gently. "But we both grew up, Chat. Neither of us screwed up at all."

Chat furrowed his brows at that. "Is there anything I can do now to change?"

"You wouldn't be you, Chat." She walked over to him and pulled him into a hug, leaving a hand on his shoulder after stepping back. "I know it's not what you thought you wanted, but your future will still be amazing."

"Are… you happy?"

Ladybug had a serene smile, glancing back in Viperion's general direction with her hands now over her heart. "I am."

Chat stared at her for a bit. Something about the quiet conviction she had was more… meaningful than if she'd been animated about saying it.

There was nothing to prove to anyone. It was just the truth.

Chat sighed audibly. "Okay, Ladybug. Thanks," he gave her a small smile. "Sorry. You need to get back home, right?" Ladybug nodded. "Then let's get going!"

Moments later Ladybug and Chat Noir landed together in front of Viperion, who handed the Lucky Charm back to her. She threw it high into the sky and said "Miraculous Ladybugs!"

Ladybug reached out her hand and Viperion took it in his. They smiled at each other when the waves of ladybugs passed over them.

⁂

Ladybug blinked a few times, her brain a little foggy after being hit with that blast. She'd been trying to save Viperion from the akuma's attack… She must have been a little too slow. Wait, where were they? And Viperion was in front of her now, and he looked… okay?

He was staring down at something. When she looked in the same direction she saw that they were holding hands. A small part of her panicked and wanted to pull away, but… an overwhelmingly larger part of her… liked it? Viperion hadn't pulled away either. So she… didn't pull away.

"Welcome back, Viperbug," Chat laughed, his baton across his shoulders with his hands on either end.

"What… happened?" Ladybug asked, her cheeks slightly pinking as she kept a hold of Viperion. It just felt… kinda nice.

"There was something about the future," Viperion said, still staring down at their linked hands. "I feel like there was something important, but… I can't seem to remember."

"Yeah, you guys got hit by the akuma but we still managed to take care of it. Paris is safe again," Chat smiled. "I'm heading out. See you guys later!" he yelled out, leaping away after saluting.

Huh. It felt like Chat wanted to leave faster than usual. He didn't even stop for their typical "Bien Joué!"

"… I guess we're done here? Alright, I'll drop you back off at home," Ladybug said to Viperion.

⁂

(One day later)

"Hey Marinette," Luka said from behind her. Marinette yelped and windmilled forward, nearly falling over but quickly got back to her feet and spun on her heels to face him. "… Are you looking for Juleka?" He had a smile on his face… one part amusement by her antics and another part joy in seeing her.

She'd come onboard the Liberty and stood on the deck… there wasn't any real reason why, she just kinda… showed up. "Ah haha, um, no, no I a-actually… I was just um! Looking around! Yeah! The-The stage!" Oh God why did she say that.

Luka rolled with it, even though Marinette was certain he knew she just made that up. "Sure, feel free. It's good to see you."

"Too! It's you! I mean it's good to you! See you. Too," she laughed nervously. He moved around her and set his backpack down against the atrium couch. She slapped both hands to her face and cringed when she thought he wasn't looking at her. Auuugh.

"I'm gonna get a snack. Do you want anything?"

She jumped again, hiding her hands behind her back. "Oh! S-sure, thanks, that's great."

"Cool, do you want to follow me down and let me know what you'd like?" She nodded and went to the main cabin with him. She sat down at the kitchen counter bar and asked for juice, sipping it nervously when he sat in the seat next to her.

"I… I actually just wanted to talk with you," she said. "You… said I can just be myself around you." It had been hard to look at him so she just stared at her glass, feeling self conscious.

"Yeah, always," he said easily. He'd gotten some yogurt for himself, but he hadn't opened it up yet. "What do you want to talk about?"

"I… There was… You know…" she started, sighing when she couldn't get the words she wanted out. "I'm not sure how to say it but… have you ever gotten the sense that you… missed something really important? Like you got caught up in something… silly and there was this really cool person you passed by 'cause you were distracted." She finally looked up at him.

"If they're still around you still have a chance to say hi," he smiled at her. "People are pretty chill, and I'm sure they'd love to talk with you." He opened up his yogurt and took a spoonful.

Marinette was pretty sure she was blushing. "Y-Yeah, he's pretty chill. Soooo. Hah, um. Hi."

With the spoon in his mouth he got out a "Hmm?"

"Wanna… see a movie?" She should clarify. "J-Just us! No group!" She should further clarify. "A date! It's a date! I'm asking!"

He swallowed too fast and started coughing. At least he hadn't swallowed the spoon. "Ah," he laughed after recovering. "That sounds great, but…" Marinette's heart jumped into her throat. "I wanna make sure you're… sure," he said awkwardly. "Sure you're not… missing out on what you really want," he added, blushing a bit himself.

"Th-That's why… I'm asking," she said shyly. "I-I think… What I really want is… something new. Someone that helps make me better, you know? Makes me happy too. And… I've been thinking about you."

"Me," he said, sounding a little surprised.

Marinette nodded. "Are… are you… interested?"

He took her hand in his. "Yeah. Definitely."

[ziaxkawaii]

Cute toothy grin (Kirishima x Reader)

Pairing: Kirishima x Reader

Warnings: Cursing.

Summary: Kirishima gets turned into a toddler.

~Your relationship with Kirishima has been more interesting and wonderful than you could begin to explain.

~The two of you were the: Cutesy smile couple, for the obvious reason that you two seemed to shine like the sun when you two smiled in each others company or even when you were separated.

~Your partner since the beginning of UA, was always so caring and a loving boyfriend when you hung out, and was always there when you needed him the most. 

~Of course you happily returned the favor when he himself needed some affection.

~Today turned out to be one of those days where you need to be with him at all times. At least for today.

~You and Kirishima worked at the same agency for hero-work study, and as much as it sounded that it was intentional, it wasn’t. It was a happy little surprise when you two found out that you both would be working together for the Pro-hero Fat Gum.

~For the past month, everything was going smoothly. Nothing too crazy happened and only couple of incident were bad enough to cause you minor injuries, but nothing you couldn’t handle.

~That changed however when you, Kirishima and Tamaki also known as Suneater, were chasing down two villains. One of them had a quirk that made their hair grow as long as they wished and they could control it like some octopus tentacles.

~You had no idea what kind of quirk the other one had but it was soon found out when Kirishima slipped and got hit by it. Unfortunately the villain got away but the good news was Tamaki managed to apprehend the hair-tentacle villain. Still you and Tamaki were upset for the failure.

~You were about to inform, that it could have ended much worse, but a sound of slight sniffling and ruffling of clothes caught your and Tamaki's attention.

~You turned around and swore on the spot that you were dreaming.

~On the other side of the rooftop sat a little teary eyed toddler in a far too large hero costume for his frame and with a completely different hair color than before. a Pretty coal black.

~”Ei-Eijiro?!!...” You exclaimed. Immediately picking up the child version of him along with the costume. You exchanged worried looks with Tamaki who didn’t seem to know what to say.

~Once you got back to the agency and told Fat Gum what happened. He too was a bit surprised to say the least. He said he would look into the villain and told you, Kirishima would be excused from doing any herowork until he turned back to normal.

~You really didn’t attract much attention on the sidewalk, but when you reached the school grounds, you started to get some interesting looks from the other students. Wondering whose child you were carrying or why he was there in the first place.

~Kirishima didn’t like all the attention so he buried his head in you shoulder to hide away while muttering something incoherent.

~You spoke with Aizawa, who didn’t really change his expression when he saw Kirishima's state. Only telling you that if he didn’t change back by the end of the week end, they had to figure something out.

~You bowed and quickly made your way to the class 1-A dorms.

~As soon as you stepped inside the building, you had the attention of the entire class that was in the common room. Some girls were squealing while some other people were generally confused.

~”Oh my, who’s this this little fella?~” Mina was the first at your side, trying to get a good look at Kirishima who was still hiding his face.

~“Are they your younger sibling?” Ochaco asked next to you. You laughed nervously.

~”No he’s not. He is actually Kirishima.” The whole class screamed in surprise. By now Kirishima lifted his head to look at the many faces surrounding him. At least he didn’t seem scared anymore.

~After briefly explaining what happened during your work study, everybody seemed to understand the situation. While your explanation, Momo had offered to make some suitable clothes for Kirishima when she noticed he was bare, now he was peeking behind every cough as if expecting something to be there, while you and your classmates were sitting and talking in the living room.

~”So we have no idea how long he’ll be like this?” Kaminari asked as he instinctively rubbed Kirishima’s head in a brotherly way from his seat. Kirishima tries to push his hands away while laughing wildly. 

~”Stop! No, not the hair!” He whined smiling.

~”Huh… So he has been like that since childhood.” Muttered Sero.

~”But everything aside, what are we supposed to do? Babysit him for the weekend?” Ojiro jumped into the conversation.

~”I wouldn’t mind taking care of him.” You admitted and you took the turn to run your fingers through Kirishima's black locks when he was tugging on your pants, demanding attention.

~”That settles it then, but don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it.” Tsuyu informed you and you nodded, picking up your boyfriend and placing him on your lap.

~”I’ll keep that in mind.”

~~~

~You panted heavily as you rested on the common room couch. Just as your ‘babysitting’ started, Kirishima wanted play a game. You of course compiled, as you couldn’t say no to his adorable shark grin and eyes that twinkled like stars were in them. 

~After playing tag for what felt like hours, you were tired and Eijiro on the other hand didn’t seem faced at all. Apparently children have infinite energy.

~”Let’s play hide and seek!”

~”What?!” You immediately lifted your head and scanned your surroundings. Kirishima was nowhere in sight. Panic rose within your chest.

~“Where did he go?!” You exclaimed looking around once more to make sure you weren’t mistaken. Shit… He could be literally anywhere. In the basement, outside since the back door was open at the moment or even in someone's dorm room. Why do kids have to be so damn fast on their feet?

~”The hell you’re crying here about!?” Yelled a familiar voice that belonged to the one and only explosive blond. You and Bakugou weren’t best friends per say, but you do talk to each other here and there since you were: ‘not as bad as the other extras’ in his book.

~”I’m afraid I have lost my partner in a game of hide and seek, but the open front and back doors at this hour are not helping the case.”

~”Why are you so worked up over nothing? Shitty-hair can handle himself just fine until you find him.”

~”He literally hurt himself twice with his own quirk in the past hour! Plus he managed to spill water all over himself and the rug while taking a sip.” You said. Referring how clumsy he is in this toddler form. 

~Bakugou was present when that incident happened. His idiotic friend was drinking a glass of water but for some reason decided to dip his head and glass far too back and the drink spilled all over his face, clothes and the rug. Kids are stupid and there’s no telling what he could do next.

~As much as he would’ve liked to already be sleeping, he couldn’t leave Kirishima in trouble at this state. He was still a friend. (Although bakugou continues to deny their friendship). ”Damn it..., fine. I’ll look outside, you’ll look inside. Clear?”

~”Crystal.” You replied and already headed off to check the laundry room. When you were a child, that was the best hiding place for you so it seemed like a good start. You opened the door to laundry room and made a quick search.

~”Not here.” You continued to the next place. The baths.

~Now, you definitely aren’t going in the boys baths. You just need some outside help. Fortunately, Tokoyami was about to enter the baths but you called his name and stopped him in his tracks.

~”Hey, Tokoyami. I seem to have lost Eijiro, so can you please help me look if he’s in the baths?” You inquired, slightly embarrassed since you had to admit your failure to more people.

~”I’ll take a look then.” He said and walked in. After a few minutes of standing in the hallway, You heard Tokayami’s voice shout.

~”He is not here (y/n)!”

~”Oh, okay thank you!” You called and went to check the girls baths for good measure. Not there either.

~There weren’t really any good places in the dorms to hide, so it was getting kind of ridiculous that you still haven't found him after checking the emergency stairs, the second, third and fourth floor. You even checked his own room but he wasn’t there, and now you were getting even more anxious.

~”It’s fine, Either me or Bakugou, will find him sooner or later.” You calmed yourself. You walked to fifth and also the last floor, if Eijiro wasn’t here you don’t know what you would do.

~You took a few steps into the hallway and spotted something on the ground. Bending down you picked it up. It was a band-aid, more specifically the same kind you used to patch Kirishima up when he got hurt today.

~”He has at least been here.” You said to yourself. Then a sudden conclusion hit you. Your dorm room was on this floor…. could he be? You walked to your room door and pulled the handle. Just as you pulled it open, something from inside jumped on you and you stumbled back. 

~”You found me (y/n)!” The black haired toddler cheered. You were still shocked from his sudden jump on you, but you brought your arms around him and pulled him close.

~”Eijiro! You scared me, please don’t leave so suddenly! I was worried.” You hugged him tighter. Eijiro seemed to begun to understand his mistake.

~”I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to….” He apologized, but then let out a deep yawn.

~”Oh, you must be tired. We should get you to bed.” You said and instinctively picked him up, now you started to question the sleeping arrangements. Can you just take him to his room to sleep or are you supposed to sleep next to him as a form of security?

~You got your answer quickly when Kirishima wrapped his tiny arms around you like a vice, with no intention of letting go. You sighed and walked into your room and attempted to lower him down onto your bed.

~”Eijiro. Come on, I have to change.” You whispered while gently tugging his hands. He let go with a whine and cuddled up with your comforter. You swiftly changed out of your school uniform that you, for some reason still wore the whole day, and into a tank top and shorts.

~You crawled into your bed and as by instinct, Kirishima was instantly hugging you again. The image of him being flushed to your chest while your arm was protectively around him, made you smile.

~Usually it was the other way around, but you sure as hell aren’t complaining. He was so cute afterall!

~You pressed a quick kiss to his forehead and let yourself fall into a peaceful slumber.

~~~

~You felt warm. A little bit too warm, but you felt comfortable nonetheless. The sun peeked through your curtains as it obnoxiously shined in your eye. You figured it was a great time to wake up, but a massive weight on your body stopped you.

~You looked down and realized it was your boyfriends body that held you down. He had turned back to his normal form and his hair was the usual crimson red. Dyed or not, it was perfect in your eyes no matter what.

~His head nestled on your shoulder while his other arm held your waist firmly. It would have been cute…. if he wasn’t completely bare… Now you definitely felt like you were on fire as you blushed profusely.

~Whatever was out there had been merciful and hid Kirishima's ass under sheets, but you could see everything else. You unintentionally shreaked and fell off the bed, the noise you were making woke the sleeping boy up.

~”What’s wrong?” He asked tiredly rubbing his eyes.

~”P- P-Put some clothes on!” You turned around when he went to get up.

~”Huh..?” He took a look of himself and also blushed immediately, it only worsened when he remembered last days events.

~I-I’m so sorry for everything!!!” He apologized profusely, attempting to cover himself up with his hands. Oh, how embarrassed he was.

~”There were no clothes for you to wear in my room. I’ll go get some from your’s.” You announced, and got up to leave. But turned around before you stepped outside.

~”And about yesterday, don’t be sorry.” You called. “You’re just so cute with that smile of yours, so you're forgiven.” You winked bashfully and left, leaving Kirishima to fall on your bed, red faced.

[bluezey]

Pretty Pretty Dresses - extended cut

Someone wanted to see an extended version of the Pretty Pretty Dresses drabble, and I felt inspired to do such a thing.  There’s a lot more fluff in it, and it ends with Ian being humiliated, cause you know me, I’m a jerk to characters I love.

So, for those who haven’t heard or need a refresher, this is just basically Ian being a big brother to his new little sister Judy, in a way that some readers may not expect, and some might.

It was late Friday afternoon when Ian came home.  Willowdale College is about an hour away, so he likes to visit every other weekend. Especially when he doesn’t have that much homework.  This weekend could be a little bit of an exception, he has a report to write, and an exam on Wednesday.

As he opens the front door, he hears the familiar footsteps racing towards him.  It’s not Blazey this time.

“Ian!” the little three year old girl cheered, arms out as far as she could stretch them.

He happily knelt down and caught her in a big hug.  “Judy!”

Ian and Barley were not surprised when Laurel and Colt got married, but boy were they surprised when they found out their mother was pregnant with Colt’s child.  Funny enough, it wasn’t that the child was going to be half elf, half centaur that Ian and Barley had to prepare for.  It was that the child was going to be a girl. Not long after that shocker, Ian had to share Barley’s bedroom, Ian’s old bedroom was turned into their little sister’s bedroom, and Judith was born.

It took some getting used to, the young adult brothers now having a little sister, now three and a half years old.  Especially for Ian.  Not only giving up his bedroom to become Barley’s new roommate (thank Alora for college dorms), but being a big brother in general.  Over time, as Judy grew from a baby to a preschooler, they got the hang of it. Barley seemed to handle the more tomboy things, like rough housing, making mud pies, catching bugs, even playing Quests of Yore once Barley adjusted the rules to make the game easier for her. While Ian…

“Are you here for the tea party?” Judy asked.

“Oh, uh,” Ian stood back up. “I have homework to do.  I wish I could…”

Judy’s glowing smile immediately fell to a frown, her elf ears flopped downward a little thanks to those extra ear muscles she got from the centaur side.

Ian felt terrible, but gave a little grin as he thought aloud, “But Iandelle may be available.”

“Really?” Judy hugged her big brother’s long spindly legs.

Ian patted the top of her brown haired head.  “Go to your room, she’ll see you in a minute.”

“Kay, brother!” Judy went running upstairs, slowing a bit so she can clop each hoof on the stairs.

Ian picked up his backpack and suitcase, took his staff and headed to his bedroom.  Well, his and Barley’s bedroom.  Ian opened the door and peeked his head inside first, seeing if Barley was there.  Nope, their bedroom was empty.  Barley must be working another job.  Let’s see if he can keep this one.

Ian had to step over some dirty laundry, trash and Quests of Yore toys to make it across the bedroom. Barley’s mess sure has expanded since Ian was gone and Barley had their room to himself.  Thankfully, the part of their room that had Ian’s desk, bed and closet still had some clean floor left.  Wish he could do something about the musky smell though.

Ian placed his suitcase and backpack on his bed and his staff by his desk.  He opened up his closet doors.  Thankfully he got the closet while Barley made do with his clothes in a dresser.  Well, most of the closet, there were a few stacks of gaming and “questing” toys on the top shelf.

Squeezing past a wood dresser shoved into his closet, Ian dug deep behind some of the clothes hung up on hangars and grabbed an outfit he purposely hid as deep as he could.  It wasn’t that he was embarrassed, it’s just that he’d be embarrassed if anyone but Judy caught him in it.  After finally unhooking it from the hangar, Ian pulled out a pristine white costume dress, frilly with pastel bows and puffy cap sleeves. Ian draped the dress on his bed before staring at it, giving a soft “this is ridiculous” shake of his head.  But he still had a grin on his face cause, well, it’s for Judy.

Ian got dressed into the pink frilly dress, fumbling a bit to reach the zipper in the back, but he managed to get it.  He sat down and pulled the dress up to his knees, then put on a pair of lacey white stockings that ran up to his mid thigh with matching pink ribbon and bows sewn on the hem.  Yeah it was silly, but he’ll take to the grave that he thinks he looks in them.

Once dressed and ready, Ian peeked his head out the bedroom door, looking both ways to see if the coast is clear.  No one in sight.  Hitching up the skirt a bit so he can walk better, without tripping on the hem that is, Ian crept his way upstairs, easing into a walk to his old bedroom, now Judy’s room.

The walls and floor remained untouched, but everything that reminded Ian of his old room was gone. Where his bed once was instead had a little girl’s bed, well still pretty big since it had to fit her horse half, covered with sheets branded with the many princesses and queens from the Pretty Pretty Centaurs series.  Where his blue rug used to be was a heart shaped rug so pink he could be blinded by it. His old closet was now overflowing with a mixture of toys, butterfly nets, foam play swords and other assorted play things.  The room also included a white wooden dresser, a plastic toy table with a little play tea set, and a small plastic play vanity.

Judy was already dressed as one of her favorite play dresses, complete with a matching plastic tiara.  She backed out of her closet, pulling one of her Pretty Pretty Centaur dolls out of a pile, letting the pile fall as she freed the dollie.  She turned to see Ian standing in the doorway, and her face glowed that cooling pink elf faces are known for when she smiled. “Princess Iandelle!”

Ian chuckled.  It’s just him in a dress, a boy elf in a dress. But since Barley made up that nickname, it just stuck whenever Ian was in a dress.  “Hey Judy.  I heard I was invited to a tea party?”

“Do you want to play makeups first?” Judy asked.

Ian sighed, keeping up that smile, though the rest of his face fell.  He thought it was just going to be a quick play date, but makeovers?  But, how could he say no to that little face? That little face that could throw a pretty big tantrum if she wanted to.

Ian tried to sit in the little plastic kid’s chair by the vanity, making sure to keep his legs together and his skirt covering so only his feet showed.  He may be a boy, but he still has to sit properly in a dress. Judy opened up the small drawer in the plastic vanity, pushing away the fake plastic molded prop makeup for the real makeup Judy and Ian hide in the back.  Just blush and lipstick, nothing too fancy.  And if Ian helped apply them, nothing too messy.  Ian applied a thin layer of pink lipstick, subtle but complimented Judy’s blue elf skin perfectly.  He then added a thin layer of pink blush that gave her freckly cheeks a nice sparkle.  It was Judy’s turn, painting Ian’s cheeks in the same blush, and coating his lips in a soft blue that made his lips just a touch more darker.  He smiled, approving of Judy’s makeover.  Then, when Judy’s back was turned, quickly grabbed a paper towel and mirror to remove a whole lot of it so his makeup looked more like a subtle touch up than clown paint.

Judy returned from the toppled pile with an armful of accessories.  Ian sighed, preparing himself.  Judy picked out some clip on earrings and a pink bow hair clip for Ian, and a toy necklace for herself.  Ian clipped the earrings onto his long blue elf ears and helped Judy with clipping the bow to the side of his head.  At least the hair clip was small and nice.  The costume jewelry earrings, however, were gawdy, and didn’t match the outfit at all.

“And now we’re ready for the tea party,” Judy declared happily.

Ian exhaled.  “Oh.  Good.”

Judy sat down at the plastic kiddie table, the back legs of her horse half perched in a little plastic chair.  Ian chose to sit on the floor, his legs folded so he was sitting on his calves. The skirt puffed up around the lower half of his body, making him look like a cupcake decorated with white and pink icing.  Judy placed her Pretty Pretty Centaur doll at the table, their third member to their tea party.

“Would you like some tea, Princess Iandelle?” Judy asked politely as she picked up the ceramic toy teapot.

Ian offered his little ceramic teacup.  “Why thank you, Princess Judy.”  He smiled politely.

Minutes passed as Ian and Judy shared their little tea date together.  Ian “sipped” on some calming tea and “nibbled” on some imaginary crumpets as they had some polite conversation.  Ian shared what he was learning in college and studying magic, mostly Judy nodded but didn’t understand the college stuff.  Judy told of her art projects and friends she made in daycare, or what antics she and Barley have been up to.  Ian would smile and politely ask a question or two when Judy had her Princess Idina doll speak.

As Ian was in the middle of a sip of tea, he heard a loud snap and a caught a quick flash out of the corner of his eye.  He quickly turned and caught sight of Barley’s janky smart phone ducking behind Judy’s bedroom door.

“BARLEY!!” Ian shot up to standing, but one step later, Ian planted face first onto the floor.

Barley was halfway down the hall, smart phone in hand, laughing loudly, as Ian burst through the door and came running down the hall.  Barley noticed Ian holding up the skirt a bit so he could run better, revealing those lacey white stockings underneath.  Quickly, Barley took another picture.

When Ian heard that loud snap, he nearly died a little inside.  “NO!!” he shouted as he tackled Barley to the ground.

The two brothers wrestled on the hardwood floor of the hallway.  Barley was trying to pin Ian down, while Ian was grabbing desperately for Barley’s phone.  In their struggle, Ian lost one of those costume earrings.

“Come on, Princess Iandelle,” Barley asked, putting Ian in a head lock and giving his head a noogie.  “Where’s your sense of humor?”

Ian struggled to grab the phone off the floor, just inches from his fingertips.  “Delete those pictures this instant!”

“Yay!  Barley’s home!” Judy came bolting out of her bedroom and leaped into the pile, thinking it was time to wrestle.  Barley was happy to play, letting Ian go and grabbing Judy by the waist, picking her up.  Man, Barley can be strong!

This was Ian’s chance. He scrambled to grab the phone, but found it missing.  He did a double take back to Barley’s direction.  Shantar’s Talon, he must still have the phone!

“Kids!” Laurel called from downstairs.  “Dinner’s almost ready!”

Soon as Ian heard his mom’s voice, he caught the smell of dinner baking in the oven.  How long have Barley and mom been home?  How long have he and Judy been playing?

“Okay, kiddo,” Barley told Judy, leading her to  the bathroom. “Time to wash up for dinner.”

“Aww,” Judy moaned.

Ian wiped the lipstick off his face with the back of his hand.  “And delete those photos, Barley!”

“Oh no!” Barley’s voice echoed through the hall.  “They are too good!”

Ian groaned as he stood up, adjusting his feet so he doesn’t step on the hem and rip his dress.  He made his way downstairs and headed to his and Barley’s bedroom to get changed back into his usual clothes.

Laurel was in the kitchen when she caught sight of Ian at the door.  “Will Princess Iandelle be joining us for dinner tonight?” she asked with a smile.

“Mom,” Ian groaned as he shut the bedroom door behind him.

[faunaflanaganarchive]

here we go again | fae

Who: Fauna Flangan and Jae Puckerman @puckerjae What: Bingo Card Mamma Mia Roleplay (Fauna), Use of clothes as bondage (Jae)  Where: Jaes place When: Wednesday 09/09/20

Rorys card was ridiculous and that was the point of it, so Fauna didn’t feel at all nervous dressed up in the seventies flairs that glittered with every step that she took. “I know I look mad, but please don’t laugh Sir.” She teased lightly, passing her microphone from one hand to the other.

Jae was still getting used to so many people calling him 'Sir' for this bingo event, but the scene he had in store with Fauna was silly enough to distract him from that feeling. He couldn't help but laugh at her get-up. "You look adorable, tho. I could never laugh at you. I love it." He leaned back on the couch, ready for the performance. "Serenade away..." “Thank you, I’m never one to half do a costume so if I commit to something then imma do it all the way.” She promised, and then started up the music on her phone. Wiggling her butt as she completed a very over the top version of Super Trooper from the movie. Thinking the whole situation was funnier because he didn’t know the film at all. Jae nodded, he did like the commitment. He also didn't know what to expect, so when the music started blaring and she started singing and swaying her hips, it was hard for him to comprehend what the song was even about and even more what the movie was about to have a song like this in the movie. Still he took it for what it was and realized Fauna had an amazing voice. He wanted to dance along but also didn't want to  embarrass himself. So he just watched with a huge smile on his face, clapping loudly when it finally came to and end. "Oh - wow. That was great!" Fauna was a little out of breath by the time she was finished, but she always enjoyed putting on a show. “Thank you ever so much Sir, hopefully ive tempted you into watching the movie sometime.” The brunette responded, slotting the little microphone into her belt. "I'm not just saying this, I promise, but I really might have to watch this. I'm thinking and hoping that maybe you could watch it with me? Cause I feel like I'm gonna need a lot of things explained." the performance ending meant that it was time for his turn of the deal and he was suddenly nervous. Maybe they should have lead with his part and relaxed after with the performance. She took a shaky breath and looked over her ensemble. "Okay. Can you take of the jacket and pants?" He asked trying to figure out how he would use those items for bondage. “Of course I’ll watch it with you Sir! half of the fun of Mamma Mia is someone singing along to all the songs and giggling at all the cheesy jokes with you.” The brunette replied, and then nodded. “Sure, honestly these things are so long.” She told him as she wriggled her way out of the pants and trousers. “The legs are pretty long so you could probably tie me to something using them?” She suggested. "We'll have to set that up some time." Jae was looking for more small talk, to put off the rest of the scene, but he knew he would have to do it eventually so he took her suggestion in stride and got to what they were there to do. "Yeah, that sounds great. Thanks." He looked around the room and pointing to the table. "Maybe we can sit you on top and tie you to the table top here. and tie your hands to your legs, stretch your body a little. What do you think?" Fauna nodded easily. “No worries at all Sir, creative problem solving is fun.” She told him, and then wandered over to the table hopping up on top. “Sounds good to me, I’ve never been tied with my own pants before so this is definitely something new!” Jae was pleasantly surprised by how well this was going with Fauna. Especially when considering how weird some of these bingo slots were. They were having fun with it though and Fauna definitely made it easy for him. He smiled at her comment. "First time for everything, right?" He held his hand out to her to help her get settled on top of the table. "Ready?" He asked, taking the pants in his hands and kneeling down in front of the table. Fauna had no trouble submitting to Jae, he didn’t make her feel small or worried that he was going to take advantage of her. She simply felt like she was helping out a friend which was something she always liked to be able to do. “Indeed Sir, you never know it could become your go to bondage.” She chattered, stretching out her limbs for him to make it easier. “Ready when you are.” She agreed Jae chuckled a bit. He would probably never use articles of clothing again, but she was right, he needed to keep an open mind. Once she gave him the go ahead and stretched herself a bit, he separated both pant legs and scooped the underside of the table with it, then tied them around the thickest part of her thighs, to ensure that it would keep her in place. The fabric was a little too thick for his liking when it came to tying it, but he managed, double knotting it to ensure it would stay put. "How does that feel?" Fauna imagined that it would be pretty hard to work with the denim and almost felt bad that she hadn't worn something that might be a little bit easier to use. She lay as still as she could to try and make it easy for him as he worked, watching as he knotted the fabric. "Feels tight enough Sir, I don't think I could escape." She commented. "Awesome." He pulled on the knot again to make sure because he needed that one to be strong for the next one to work. He offered her his hand again, pulling her up into a sitting position and pulling her arms forward so that her wrists were touching her ankles. "Is that too much? How does that feel?" Fauna smiled at him, taking his hand and balancing in the sitting position that he had placed her in. It was the second time she'd been tied up in the past couple of days, so it really wasn't all that much of an imposition. She could easily touch her wrists to her ankles thanks to cheerleading so she shook her head when he asked if it was too much. "It's fine thank you Sir, cheerleading flexibility comes in handy." It seemed as though Jae had lucked into having Fauna as a partner for this particular scene, she was more than accommodating and seemed like the perfect fit for this type of bondage. She was easily pulled forward and stayed there effortlessly as he got the jacket ready to tie her wrists to her ankles. "That's right, I did see you out there during the game. Awesome." He tucked the jacket beneath her feet then pulled her forward a little bit more, wanting to really get her to stretch out. When the knot was complete, he tugged at that one as well to ensure she was secure. "Awesome, that worked out better than I thought. How are you feeling? Is it stretching you out at least a little bit?" Fauna hadn't done a lot of bondage that was for anything beyond just holding her in place, or for like sex reasons so she actually enjoyed the challenge aspect of being stretched out. "Thank you, I literally had no idea how much I was going to enjoy cheerleading until I started doing it." She leaned further forward for him as he tied her wrists to her ankles. "It definitely feels like a stretch." She confirmed, feeling the familiar pull of exercise in her muscles. "It say it's working pretty well Sir!" "Well you definitely look like you're having a hell of a lot of fun out there while you're cheering." The casual conversation helped Jae stay centered and grounded. When she confirmed it was a stretch, he smiled. It was what helped him, putting a challenge ahead of him so that when that particular task or challenge was met, he could feel accomplished. "Okay cool, awesome. Good." He pulled back a little bit and took out his phone. "I think ten minutes in that position just to make it ache a little then we're done?" He swiped up. "Would if be okay if I snapped a couple of photos of you like this?" "It's a clique but cheering really is a sport to me, like the achievement of getting a stunt right and the thrill of flying.. it's really something." Fauna explained, and nodded along with his assessment of ten minutes. "Ten minutes sounds good Sir, honestly Alexis and Q will be glad of the extra work out it will put me through." The brunette joked, and then nodded. "Snap away, I'm sure I look hella weird." "Are you kidding? It's definitely a sport. The way you guys are being thrown into the air like that? Most people could never." Jae was not just gassing her up. He found some of their routines just as, if not more exciting than the actual game. Especially when it was in terms of adrenaline pumping. She continued to make him smile and make him feel proud of the work he was doing in regards to this scene. "Cool, thanks." He just wanted to commemorate some of the more bazar memories, and this definitely counted as one of them. Once he got a few pics, he showed her. "It kind of looks normal when you ignore the denim and pleather," he commented. “Eh some people have teased me when I called it a sport.” she confessed. “But honestly I’m literally at my pique physical health right now, I’ve never worked so hard.” She allowed herself to focus on stretching the muscles for a moment, not wanting to go into cramp by moving anything wrong. “I doubt that, but send one to me will you when we’re done Sir? . I think I’d like to put it on my wall of photos.” "You don't have to convince me, I totally believe you." He couldn't help but laugh at her reaction to his comment. It did look odd, there was no way around that, but the position itself looked exactly like something he'd seen during his research. He couldn't wait till his body was stretched and pulled as the result of predicament bondage. He had time now when he checked his phone for the time and sent it to her quickly before kneeling down in front of her to better see her face. "We're almost there. Just like another minute or so." He changed positions, sitting down completely and crossed his legs before putting the phone down, ready to untie her when it went off. “Honestly I might have to do this to get my hamstrings stretched before I do my next handstand training.” Fauna mused, her muscles burned but it was definitely more of a work out than it was sexy to her. Even with Sawyer she wasn’t so sure she could see it as a kink. “No worries Sir, I do the splits for half an hour sometimes.” She admitted, waiting for the timer. The talk of encouragement was probably more for himself than for her, but he was grateful she was acknowledging him. It seemed like no more time had passed at all before the timer was going off. He swiped it off then moved to untie the jacket first but before he let it loose completely, he grabbed her hand to keep her from springing back too much on her own. He dropped the jacket then stood, only to help lay her back on her back so he could untie the jeans from her ankles. He massaged the muscles there for a moment then did the same to her wrists. "How you feeling?" When the timer went off, Fauna moved her neck around a little and then gratefully moved her wrists back as she was untied. “Thank you Sir.” She acknowledged as he untied the jeans and helped her to loosen her muscles a little. “Like I just did a handstand for ten minutes.” She laughed. “But fine.” Jae laughed along with her, finally relaxed because the scene was finally over. He held his hand out to her and helped her up off the table and held his hand up for a high five. "That was weird, but also awesome. Thanks for helping me out, Fauna. You can go back to just calling me Jae now," he offered with a smile. She jumped down from the table happily, giving him a big high five and then doing a quick stretch of her back. “No problem at all Jae, it was a total pleasure. Getting to perform Mamma Mia is always a dream come true.” JaeToday at 20:52 He went back to his usual self, rubbing the back of his neck with a small smile. "Next week I'll text you then? About watching Mamma Mia?" “Please do, because I’m absolutely holding you to that.” She warned him before giving him a smile and then a wave before slipping off.

[goingoverthegardenwall]

Chapter 3: Schooltown Follies

Since there have been stories, there have been stories that anthropomorphize animals. Folks have imagined creatures behaving as humans in every corner of the world, in myths and fables and fairy tales from ancient cultures to today. So by the turn of the 20th century, when a mycologist known for painting incredibly detailed images of fungus decided to instead write and illustrate stories about animals in contemporary clothes, it wasn’t exactly a new idea. But perhaps that makes it more impressive: despite the multitude of animal books for children that have been published in the last hundred and fifty years, the work of Beatrix Potter still stands out.

She’s not alone, of course: no good conversation about humanized animals in Western kid lit can last long without mentioning Richard Scarry or Margaret Wise Brown or Arnold Lobel. And Peter Rabbit’s extended family is quite British, which puts it at odds with the nostalgic Americana of Over the Garden Wall: it’s not for nothing that our assortment of animals in Schooltown Follies includes a raccoon and an opossum. But the timeless quality of Potter’s work is still felt in this episode in two ways. First, while the show has a cartoony lens, the school animals are far more anatomically accurate than Beatrice or the frogs of Lullaby in Frogland, evoking Potter’s signature field guide style. And second, there’s a mischief to Potter’s animals that makes them feel more like real children than the cute but bland residents of Scarry’s Busytown, and mischief is the name of the game when Greg comes to schooltown.

Schooltown Follies is full of clever tricks, but perhaps its most clever is introducing animals with human qualities (they wear clothes, play instruments, and walk on their hind legs) but not giving them voices. It’s generally great comedy fuel, showing the inherent ridiculousness of a school for sorta normal animals, but it more importantly allows the episode a silent movie feel, with plenty of physical humor enhanced by characters without dialogue. That style completes the episode’s subversion of Beatrix Potter’s oeuvre: she wrote stories about naughty animals learning that they should behave, but in this vaudeville version, the only way to save the day is by misbehaving.

“Then I’ll do what I need to do, I guess.”

Despite being one of our three main characters, Greg trades a full character arc for a comic relief role. At the beginning of Over the Garden Wall he’s a chatty kid who never gives up and loves fun, and at the end he’s a chatty kid who never gives up and loves fun. This doesn’t mean he’s fully static, as he matures enough to accept some responsibility to others instead of seeking entertainment for himself: he abandons a potential happy ending to try to save Wirt with the Beast, and returns his stolen Rock Facts Rock in the last shot of the series. But even this obligation to help out is present early on: Schooltown Follies is the first of his two focus episodes, and the foundation of his eventual heroism is established right here.

And frankly? I think it’s okay if he’s not that dynamic. Greg doesn’t change as much as Wirt or Beatrice because he doesn’t have nearly as much to overcome, and he still contributes to the show without forcing the crew to juggle three distinct arcs. Our older kids are on a shorter timer to grow up, and have clearer negative traits (Wirt’s got no confidence, Beatrice is a jerk), and while we can accuse Greg of lacking social cues, he’s so young that it’s not indicative of a larger problem. He’s just acting his age, albeit in a heightened way for entertainment, and to lose that innocence this early in his life would make this show a serious downer.

“Heightened” is the general mood of Schooltown Follies, where Greg’s less realistic behavior fits much better than The Old Grist Mill’s bottom-of-the-barrel aside. This is an episode where Two Old Cat, an old-timey bat-and-ball game that evokes a similar old-school era as our old school, involves searching for actual old cats, somehow finding them immediately, then realizing one is too old to play and must instead be taken care of by a raccoon in a newsboy cap and overalls.

While there’s plenty of humor to go around in Over the Garden Wall, this is the only fully silly episode. Our other lighthearted outings come with dark twists: Songs of the Dark Lantern introduces the Beast, Lullaby in Frogland reveals Adelaide, and Babes in the Wood turns out to be the most somber episode of the series with context. Here we almost get a parody of such a twist, with characters repeatedly mentioning a wild gorilla on the loose apropos of nothing, then revealing that the gorilla is Miss Langtree’s paramour trapped in a suit. It’s a ridiculous setup to a ridiculous punchline, aided by casting Thomas Lennon for a few lines of dialogue (his read for “I. Was. The gorilla” was worth every penny), so there’s never any sense of danger. Jimmy Brown and Enoch are equally harmless in the end, but I doubt any little kids watching are gonna get nightmares about the ape suit.

This mood is enhanced with song, but among the many musical moments in the series—Mad Love is the only episode without singing in some form—Schooltown Follies stands out by not letting any of the numbers finish. We begin and end the episode in song, but Greg doesn’t have the last lines for Adelaide Parade figured out, Langtree’s Lament faces numerous interruptions before being cut short by the bell (they actually did a full version though!), and Potatoes and Molasses gets stopped first by Mr. Langtree, then by the end credits. Even Miss Langtree’s piano rendition of last episode’s Patient is the Night halts when Greg mashes the keys. It’s the perfect atmosphere for an episode about a kid who loves fun, but is easily distracted and hasn’t developed good planning skills.

Which isn’t to say that Greg is dumb, but that he’s prone to winging it in a way that sets him apart from Wirt. While Wirt rambles his thoughts aloud, Greg takes action without telling anyone why, making his decisions appear random in a medium that often explains motives concretely to young viewers. Wandering in his own direction has become a running gag by now, and while he sets off to make the world a better place, he instead plays outside with animal truants. He’s jolted back to his quest by the bland food and dull atmosphere of lunch hour, and his irrepressible energy lightens everybody’s day without much effort. When Mr. Langtree steps in as an antagonist, Greg decides once again to do something about it, this time saying explicitly that he has no plan, but everything works out again. We get an excellent joke from his decision to rob Langtree right after he becomes sympathetic, but as usual, Greg has bigger ideas behind the humor that he just hasn’t articulated. 

While Greg is busy delightfully saving the day, Wirt and Beatrice ease into a sniping side story that establishes their relationship for the next few episodes. They got off on the wrong foot in The Old Grist Mill and twisted that ankle in Hard Times at the Huskin’ Bee, so by now Beatrice doesn’t even try to hide her disdain and Wirt gets fed up with it. This is the perfect type of subplot, one that develops our characters and fits into the theme of the episode—Wirt’s rebellious obedience bounces off Greg’s rebellious call to disobey—but doesn’t distract from the main story.

Beatrice is helpful in opening up Wirt’s snotty side in a way that allows us to cheer for him. Until now his biggest conversation partner has been Greg, and it’s tough to side with Wirt when he’s mean to Greg, but Beatrice is an equal in terms of sparring, and her rudeness is a more understandable motive for Wirt to be obstinate than Greg’s playfulness. Our last episode had him aimlessly suggest staying in Pottsfield, and he’s similarly bound to this new location, but his different attitude changes the entire story. After two episodes of dithering, it’s nice that they let Elijah Wood play a character who’s funny on purpose for a spell, reveling in annoying Beatrice.

And even though he doesn’t know what to do, we actually get our first heroic moment from Wirt here. Greg saved the day in Grist Mill, and the situation resolves without much issue in Hard Times, but Jimmy is saved from the gorilla costume because of Wirt. True, he only interferes after being commanded to by Mr. Langtree, and he clearly has no idea what to do, and he trips over his shoelaces rather than contribute in an intentional way, but it sets the stage for his rescue of Beatrice in our next episode. Deep down, when he’s not overthinking it, the kid is capable of bravery when it’s asked of him. And it’s wonderful that for all his differences from Greg, both share an impulsive approach to heroism when they decide to help others. It’s almost like they’re related.

Beyond getting a few good digs in at Wirt, Beatrice extends her meanness to Miss Langtree, which makes her pestering of the boys feel less personal: it’s not that she hates them, she’s irritable with everyone. But we also get the first hint of her warming to our heroes, letting Greg have his fun at the concert and telling Wirt to finally tie his shoes with just a tiny speckle of fondness. While she gets a bigger friendship moment in Mad Love, when she’s essentially forced to get to know Wirt better, it’s neat to see Beatrice gradually come around instead of flipping a switch after a major story event.

We’re about to get our next big Plot Episode, introducing the Beast and adding new doubts about the Woodsman, so a silly episode is just what we need. It’s our third in a row where something sinister turns out to be okay: obviously the gorilla is an example of this, but Mr. Langtree is similarly an intimidating presence who ends up being a regular man. Even the creepy squirrels from the opening shots of the Unknown’s dangers in The Old Grist Mill return as comic relief. We’re fully primed to look for goodness where we see wickedness. Just in time for us to learn to fear merry opera echoing from the woods.

Rock Factsheet

Greg’s spiel on hot dogs might not summon the Rock Fact Rock, but it certainly evokes the stone’s spirit.

Where have we come, and where shall we end?

Adelaide Parade and Potatoes and Molasses will both get dark reprises, and the former also gets the rare jolly reprise as well. But we unfortunately don’t get a harrowing future scene featuring Langtree’s Lament.

Two Old Cat is part of a list of bat-and-ball games mentioned by a rambling background teen in The Unknown.

[fanfics-of-marvel]

Winter Adventures

One Shot

Release date: 02/01/2020

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Y/N: Upon your 4th anniversary Steve has prepared a few surprises for you.

Words count: 2.5K

A/N: This fanfic was supposed to be a Christmas one but due to inability to finish it before Christmas I decided to re-write it with a slightly different theme.

Warnings: None!

One Shots | Masterlist

Taglist: @all-things-marvel-related ; @steeeeverogers ; @chipilerendi ; @mrspeacem1nusone ; @starkershomelife ; @itavero-pater (still unable to properly tag this person) ; @merlin-288 ; @nutellakirb ;  @livsheph ; @ivvitm1109 ; @misstummelisa ;

I’m not a native English speaker, so there might be spelling or grammatical mistakes.

This fanfic is my own work, it is not to be re-posted on this site or posted anywhere else without my knowledge and consent!

——————————————————–

You opened your eyes to what seemed to be a lazy winter Sunday. An ordinary day for everybody else, a special day for you.

Exactly 4 years ago a friend of yours who was dating Bucky at the time invited you over on a double date with his best friend Steve. A habit which Bucky hadn’t forgotten from their common lives in the 1940s – trying to get his best friend a date as well.

However, Steve had no interest in dating and neither did you who had just gotten out of a long serious relationship. Your friend really just wanted to cheer you up and Bucky just wanted to get Steve out of his apartment. But this particular unwillingness to go to this double date was what bonded you two that evening. You talked and talked as if the time had stopped for just the two of you. You didn’t even notice when Bucky and your friend had left. You were completely consumed by each another.

Time passed and you kept on dating. And unlike your friend and Bucky who broke up shortly after you and Steve fell into a deep loving relationship that lasted for 4 full years. And this particular day marked this milestone. However, you never were much of a celebrating person when it came to anniversaries. You never demanded big expensive gifts, romantic diners at fancy restaurants or surprising vacations to exotic places. You rarely even wanted to make anything special on these days which would be different to any other regular day. A trait about you that Steve really loved.

But on this particular anniversary Steve had prepared a surprise for you because he wanted this day to be a very special one.

It all began in the moment you opened your eyes. A delicious scent of fresh toasts and coffee was filling the air mixed with… what was that? Strawberry jam?

You looked around confused where the delightful aroma was coming from and saw Steve holding a bed tray just across the bed.

“Good morning, sunshine.” He gently whispered as he lowered himself and kissed your forehead.

“Morning, babe.” You said sleepily with only one eye opened.

“Come on, sit down. It’s breakfast time.” Steve said as he placed the bed tray in front of you.

It wasn’t the first time Steve had brought you breakfast in bed, so you didn’t suspect anything. Until after you finished eating he told you to put on clothes because you were going out.

“Why? Today is a lazy day.” You tried to protest. “Breakfast in bed, hot cocoa in bed, a book in bed, maybe lunch in bed… you and I in bed.” You said the last words with a foxy smile.

Steve smiled back at you and bit his lower lip. How tempting everything sounded. But he still wanted to fulfill his surprise for the day.

“This sounds all great but we’ll have to leave it for another day.” Steve finally said. “Because today… I have something prepared for you.” He finished with a smile.

“Steve… you know I’m not really into these anniversary celebrations.” You said. “You can just come and cuddle with me under the blanket and it’ll be all the same.”

Steve smiled even wider. “It won’t be the same. Not at all.” He finished his sentence and helped you get out of bed.

It all started at the local Ice Rink.

You gasped when you reached the place. You loved ice skating but Steve was definitely not made for it. That was why you two had never done it beforehand. But Steve wanted nothing more than to make this day a special one for you. He bravely put on the ice skates and got on the ice. For 3 full seconds he was holding up, after which he fell on his butt. You laughed uncontrollably and went to check on him.

“Oh my god, babe. Are you alright?”

“I was under ice for 70 years. I think I’ll survive this.” Steve replied back wittily.

You held his big manly hand and helped him get up. You patiently started teaching him how to do it. Fall after fall, laugh after laugh, Steve started keeping himself in the air more and more. He managed to cover longer distances. At few times he even caught up with you.

You held Steve’s hands and started pulling him forward which resulted in both of you falling on the ground. Steve had nothing more to do than hold you in his arms fully exhausted of the exertion.

“Here’s no place for snuggles.” Said the person in charge when he reached you two. “I know you love each other but there are other people in here… and kids.” The man added with a playful tone.

You got back up and continued ice skating. Steve was falling, you were laughing. But at the few moments in which he managed to keep himself in the air long enough you two held hands and skated next to each other gazing lovingly at one another. Until Steve fell down.

At the end of the allowed time Steve was filled with bruises while the only thing you got were the probable abs from the non-stop laughing.

“Steve, that was amazing!” You told him after you got out of the Ice Rink. “That was absolutely incredible!” You grabbed his neck and kissed him on the lips. “Thank you!”

“I’m glad you liked it, sweetheart, because we’ve barely began.” Steve replied with a smile.

“Huh?” You were confused but excited at the same time.

Steve grabbed your hand and led you towards the next adventure.

You saw snowballs flying everywhere. People were at ‘war’. Or at least that was what the poster said. Somebody had organized a big event of snowballs fight. And you were about to go in the middle of it.

“Ready, babe?” Steve asked you still holding your hand.

“Steve!” You screamed uncertain but smiling like a kid. Deep down you wanted this.

“Come on, honey. It’s now or never!” Steve pulled your hand and you suddenly got to the middle of the ‘war field’.

A freezing wet snowball hit your face making you fall on the ground. Steve quickly laid down upon you and took a few hits on his back and butt.

“Ouch!” He screamed. “Not the butt! I just fell on it a few times on hard ice!”

You giggled uncontrollably once again as you could feel the numerous snowballs which continued hitting Steve. Including on his butt. He continued groaning with every hit. Until the soldier in him was awoken and he started crawling towards a hiding hole. All of the time he tried to keep you safe even though you took a few hits too.

You managed to hide where no snowballs could reach you. You could barely move your face which was freezing from the first hit. Nonetheless, you couldn’t stop laughing. Steve was turning around like a meat on grill which has to be cooked evenly on both sides. He was so bruised from the Ice Rink that he couldn’t lay down on either side.

“That’s it! I’m attacking!” Suddenly, Steve said as he started forming snowballs.

You lifted yourself too and briskly made a few snowballs of your own. Then you joined the ‘war’. You felt like that for every 1 snowball thrown you were hit like 2 times. And Steve continued to groan with every hit. You were laughing so much that eventually a snowball got in your mouth and you started choking. This time it was his turn to laugh.

After about an hour of intense snowballs war you thought you were going home. Until Steve held your hand and pulled it towards the next adventure.

“Steve! But we’re soaking wet!” You tried to protest. “I even ate snow… and you have a bruised butt.” You said your final words chuckling.

“Shhh, don’t worry.” Steve calmed you. “We’re going to warm up now… and what does my butt have to do with us being wet?”

You giggled even more as a reply and let him take you wherever he wanted.

Unexpectedly, you ended up in a local café. You wondered what adventure could there be in it.

“You want some hot chocolate?” Steve asked you after you walked through the door.

“Yes, please!” You were shivering like crazy, so you were dying for some.

“Well, then you have to earn it.” Steve smiled smugly.

You looked at him confused until you reached further inside the café. A man was standing in there asking for the next volunteers.

“Over here!” Steve suddenly said raising his hand while holding yours with his other.

“Ah, the gentleman and his beautiful lady.” The host said. “Please, come here.”

Steve smiled at you with a wink and pulled your hand to the improvised stage. After everyone gasped at the fact that Captain America himself was standing in front of them you two were sent to the ‘backstage’ to change your clothes. You were put in fitted sticky-on-the-outside costumes. You couldn’t stop laughing even when you were asked to go back to the stage again. You two just looked so damn ridiculous.

“And now…” The host started. “For their free hot chocolate + a muffin Captain America himself and his girl Y/N will play our latest game – Mission Impossible, the Sticky Version!” After his final words the small crowd went crazy.

Steve looked at you with a wide smile to which you replied with an even wider smile. Then some people came to you and adhered your costume’s back to Steve’s. A whole bunch of winter-related objects were scattered on the ground. And your task was to collect them all except that either one of you had a specified type of objects to collect in a specified for that basket.

The start was given and the time started ticking. Both of you ran towards their objects causing you two to fall down.

“Oh, my butt!” Steve exclaimed for the billionth time today.

You started laughing again. Steve tried to get back up but it wasn’t synchronized with you, so he fell again… on his butt.

Your laughter was so hard that you couldn’t get up. Steve started crawling dragging you with him, so that he could collect at least his objects.

Eventually, however, your giggling calmed down, so you joined the game as well. You were trying to crawl alongside Steve even though you were more often being dragged by him. After all, he was at least 5 times stronger than you. Or maybe 10 times?

You were trying to throw some of your objects to your basket from afar. One ball bounced off the wall and hit Steve accidentally… on his butt. You assumed it was all blue by now. Some people might have given up on this game after so many painful hits. But Steve… Steve had fought in the WWII against Hydra and the Nazis. He wasn’t the one to whine and quit.

Falling and getting up, crawling and dragging one another, hitting each other accidentally. After a few minutes of real exertion the finish signal finally beeped. Only a small amount of your objects were actually in their baskets, so you assumed you had lost the game. But the real purpose of it was to have fun and of course a marketing strategy to promote the café, so you were given your free hot chocolate + a muffin.

You sat down at a quiet part of the establishment with a nice view of the stage, so you could observe the next pair playing the same game. Steve groaned when he sat down.

“You alright?” You asked him playfully.

“Very funny.” Steve replied sarcastically.

“What? I am genuinely concern of your well-being… Well, I mean… your butt’s well-being.” You blew some more air out of your nose.

“My butt is fine.” Steve finally answered after trying to keep in his laughter.

“I’m glad to hear that.” You replied with a wide smile. “Thank you, Steve. For this amazing day!”

“Well, you better have your hot chocolate and muffin quickly because we are not done for today!” Steve stated with a smile.

You gasped. There’s more?

Then you enjoyed the free hot chocolate and the delicious muffin while having a sweet conversation with Steve and laughing at the next pairs that joined the game. Somebody falling off the stage was a most unexpected outcome. Neither was the couple having a serious quarrel while playing the game. But the two little twins were absolutely adorable.

By the time you got out of the café it was entirely dark outside. Steve held your hand and pulled it towards the local park. The Christmas lights which were still on were absolutely breathtaking. But they weren’t anything new. You had enjoyed them countless time prior to this evening. Besides, Christmas had passed and everyone expected them to be removed anytime soon.

“Where are we going, Steve?” You felt the need to ask. You were really impatient to know what the next adventure was.

“Shhh, we’re almost there.” Steve replied softly as he kissed your forehead.

You walked through the park until you reached a darker part of it. You were pretty certain there used to be Christmas decoration there before. You assumed the process of removing it had begun.

“You wait right here.” Steve told you as he walked away.

He got to a man nearby and started talking to him. Then Steve got back to you and held your hand. He looked forward in anticipation. You looked there as well.

A moment later a brand new decoration lit up.

“Happy 4th anniversary, Y/N!”

You gasped and covered your mouth with your hands. That was the last thing you’d expected to show up in there.

“Oh, Steve!” You exclaimed. “It’s beautiful!”

“You like it?” Steve asked as to be sure.

“Yes, I love it!” You replied with watery eyes.

While you were staring at the lights they suddenly shut down. Your eyes were still blinded by the bright light for you to have noticed that Steve had gotten down on one knee. Next thing you knew new lights lit up.

“Will you marry me?”

You gasped even louder. That was even more unexpected. You put your shaking hands at your face. You looked to your side only to find Steve holding a box with a ring at your feet. His eyes were sparkling with hope.

“Y/N…” He started. “Will you marry me?”

“Oh god, yes!” You exclaimed when you unexpectedly heard some random observers cheering up.

Steve got up and hugged you lifting you in the air. He spun you a few times after which he removed your glove to put on the ring. He found it a little hard because of your shaky hand. The ring was stunningly beautiful. You couldn’t stop staring at it until you got home. Even though your hand was freezing.

For the rest of the evening you two discussed the future plans for the wedding. The possible date, the clothes, the food, the guests, the place. You had ideas of the invitations’ design and talked about the decorations.

After that you cuddled on the couch while a nice romantic movie was on TV. Your head was placed upon Steve’s chest. Your head was going up and down at his breathing while his heart was singing you a lullaby. Imperceptibly, you fell asleep dreaming of your future life with Steve.

————————��—————————–

Thank you for reading! If you liked it please react - reply/like/reblog! Your support is appreciated!

This fanfic is my own work, it is not to be re-posted on this site or posted anywhere else without my knowledge and consent!

[cattypatties]

Bugs bunny was known as the smooth talker and the one who always got whatever he desired. He never lost and he was never the underdog. No matter what he did it always ended with people celebrating his heroic ways. His life was the definition of perfect. He had a girlfriend Lola she was rich, funny, caring and a hopeless romantic, he had a house, he won a fucking Nobel peace prize for crying out loud! His roommate however was the opposite of everything he was Daffy Duck was a loser. A selfish, rude, loud mouthed, jerk. He was arrogant, a liar, and he was broken. He always got in trouble and never cared for anyone, but himself. He was everything that was the very definition of bad luck. Of course somehow he ended up with Tina Russo, a sassy, caring, companion. So why did this all matter? It's because Lola and bugs had been dating for 2 years and bugs had finally built up the courage to pop the question. He knew Lola was meant to be his bride right? So..then why? Why did she dump him?She left him, for a skunk. He couldn't understand. He'd always gotten what he wanted, he was kind, humble, just a bit cocky, and overall not a bad guy. So why did she leave him then? Was he not affectionate enough? He thought he was, he took her to Paris. Was he offending her? No, he never would. So what did he do wrong? Bugs dropped everything that night. He sat on his bed, pondering why..why him? He clutched the box with the ring tighter. He was so distraught he hadn't even noticed that his roommate daffy had stepped in until he felt his weight shift onto the bed. He was surprised that daffy was even here. He had specifically told Bugs that he was going to do a stupid cash grab that night, so then..why?He turned to daffy, Bugs still with fresh tears in his empty, sad, eyes. Daffy then slid his arms around Bugs thin frame and held him close, rubbing his back and comforting him. A few months had passed and Bugs was starting to settle down again, all while daffy was still there doing his usual stupid money schemes. Until one night.. "Hey bugs!" Bugs looked up from his book and set it down. Making his way towards the banister he replied quick, patiently while tapping his foot out of habit. "What's up doc?" He said in somewhat amusement, of daffy's ridiculous schemes, that happened to be almost every night since the break up. "Since I know you have nothing better to do with your life.." Daffy appeared at the balcony peering down at bugs wearing a dress and a wig, with some lipstick. "You should tag along! It'll be fun!"  he said. Bugs only shrugged and decided to hell with it, he might as well partake in the evenings schemes. After a small nod from his roomie, daffy immediately burst into a happy grin. He rushed down the stairs and thanked his pal for coming with a fast handshake and quick change clothes, they left the house in a black van.

The place they were traveling to tonight was a joint daffy nicknamed "money grab" simply because all you had to do was compete against a few other contestants who usually sucked. Daffy had been there multiple times and won every time so it wasn't to much of a hassle for him. As for bugs, he didn't know what they were going to do exactly for this rip off talent show of America's got talent, but once again he just shrugged it off. Besides bugs had done improv before moving out of his hole back in the old days when he and daffy would try to out do each other in the woods whenever Duck or rabbit season came up. Once on stage daffy still dressed funnily, introduced them both as Romeo and Juliet, but with a catch that it was a comedy version. The judges smiled expectantly they had seen him numerous times and they were always pleased with results. The audience cheered knowing that they were going to be laughing the entire time. Then the lights dimmed and the music track played setting up the scene perfectly. Bugs had walked out wearing his stupid costume that daffy had assigned him to wear. Knowing that this was a comedy he started off with a joke. "So folks, you came here for laughs right?" He paused getting ready for the punch line "So I know this is supposedly a tragedy but,"

"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you fall into an open sewer and die."

The audience laughed making bugs feel his confidence boost. As he continued daffy came on stage walking right past Bugs mentioning the party at the capulets house. As he walked past he also mentioned that the montagues and the capulets needed to accept Juliet's love for Romeo

"You have to accept me, if you truly are my family. Always..accept who you are. Unless you're a serial killer."

The audience uproars in giggles a snorts. In the final scenes daffy decides to end his loneliness

"Man I went  to therapy for being lonely without Romeo, but then no one showed up."

The audience applauded as daffy then faked his death. After that little scheme they of course won, on the drive home daffy stopped at a nearby lake. Kicking off his heels, taking of the makeup, the wig and finally the dress. Since the dress was so tight he had to slide it down his hips while Bugs was watching and taking off his costume. Bugs' face heated up despite daffy being nude all the time. He looked away wondering why he'd been feeling this way towards daffy as when he felt it towards Lola. He realized all at once as the world stopped that he couldn't actually win this battle.. Like he'd always won despite all the odds against him. But now? He couldn't actually get the girl..who was a boy because daffy was obliviously happy with Tina. He couldn't do that to him and for once..bugs felt like the underdog..not sure what to do as he watched daffy smile at him. He felt lost..and almost imperfect.,like Daffy. He laughed at the irony for a bit a cried a little..he was ready..but he'd need time. Who knew that the winner would fall for such a loser and then,They'd switch places?

I’m so sorry that couldn’t find the person who gave me this idea

Edit: it was @darkwingsnark who came up with concept. Thanks to @shadowangel624 for informing me!

Thank you for all the likes! I didn’t expect this to blow up, considering all of the text was like a heading/title font. Lol, I guess the power of baffy compels us- though I look back on it and probably could’ve written it better, yikes :/

[schmergo]

Scarlet Pimpernel at Lincoln Center (informal review)

I just saw the most amazing show at Lincoln Center last night. I said to someone the other day that I don’t usually write informal “reviews” of limited-run productions because nobody else would probably be able to get tickets to them, but this was something special. It was a one-night only semi-staged version of The Scarlet Pimpernel, which originally ran on Broadway from 1997-2000 and has never yet been revived. A rarely-performed musical, my friend Wren and I discovered it in 10th grade and quickly fell in love with the catchy score but never thought we’d see a professional production.

When I first heard about the Lincoln Center concert, I burst into tears with excitement and thought, “Oh MAN, I wish I could go!” and moped around for a few days. Then I realized, “Hang on, I have some money saved. I have lots of unused vacation days. It’s only a four-hour bus ride away. What’s stopping me from going?” And I am so glad I did. Was it a flawless production? No. Was it painstakingly and meticulously designed and rehearsed? Definitely not. But was it one of the liveliest, most entertaining shows I’ve seen with top-notch vocals, hilarious gags, and tremendous audience response (actors sometimes having to cut off the excessive cheers and applause after certain numbers) that culminated in a 100% standing ovation? All that and a bag of pommes frites.

If you’re unfamiliar with the story, The Scarlet Pimpernel is based on a classic adventure-romance novel by Baroness Emmuska Orczy. Set during the French Revolution, it’s often called the original superhero story, in which a disguised vigilante hides behind a mild-mannered secret identity. When fashionable English gentleman Sir Percy Blakeney suspects his new bride, Marguerite, may be a spy for the French Revolution, he sets off on a mission to rescue innocent people from the guillotine- without his wife finding out. But he and his band of merry men don’t fight terror with terror. No, they employ witty disguises, tricks, and antics, leaving behind the mark of a flower called the Scarlet Pimpernel (Percy’s family crest). Back home, the men escape suspicion by exaggerating their mannerisms into ridiculous caricatures of fancy fops who care more about French lace and silk than French Revolutions.

But when Marguerite’s ex-lover Chauvelin (now a high-ranking French agent) blackmails her into discovering the true identity of the Pimpernel lest her brother die, she little knows how close to home her mission will hit.

It sounds like it could either be an overwrought melodrama or a Looney Toons short- and indeed, it is a bit of both. The musical itself endured many extensive rewrites during its short run, never quite finding the right balance. This concert seems to be a mish-mash of about three different past versions with at least one new song. But despite the jarring shifts between heart-wrenching ballads and silly slapstick in which tap shoes become a valuable component in a duel and executioners are distracted by 123 rampant geese, this performance was so rich in heart, joy, and spirit that the whole audience beamed along.

Of the leading roles, the only one I’d never seen or heard before was Tony Yazbeck, inhabiting the many hats (literally) of the Pimpernel himself. I can confidently say that he gave one of the most brilliant performances I’ve ever seen, period. Although he’s already an accomplished performer, I suspect this one-night show might catapult him to being a massive star. He’s, like, a quadruple threat, with so much stage presence that he shimmers. Yazbeck’s Percy can be ludicrously silly or achingly sincere, powerful or vulnerable, with a powerhouse voice and untiring energy and grace. I was sitting close enough to see all of his facial expressions, however over-the-top or subtle, and he was totally immersed in the character the entire time, sometimes hurling his script to the ground with emotion. (Remember, it was a staged concert with about a week of rehearsal.) He frequently breaks the fourth wall, trying to steal a violinist’s bow, dropping ad-libbed comments, sitting in the audience or dancing down the aisle, without dropping his polished English accent. I can’t wait to see what he’ll do next.

My personal favorite singer, Norm Lewis, co-starred as sinister French operative Chauvelin, who I can best describe as a more seductive Javert who is constantly humiliated by those around him. Having recently seen him in the Music Man, in which he gave a jovial performance but struggled with some lyrics, I was relieved to see that he held his script in hand most of the time here. He still flubbed the occasional word and seemed overly reliant on his script at times, but oh my good golly, I have NEVER heard his voice sound better. He has one of the richest, most powerful voices on Broadway, not to mention a huge vocal range, and this score puts all of it to use. This is the 6th time I’ve seen him live (plus his filmed performances in the 25th anniversary Les Mis concert and NBC’s Jesus Christ Superstar), and every song he sang here sent huge chills up my spine and fireworks off in my brain. Gosh, I love him. I do think Mr Lewis bit off a little more than he could chew doing these two semi-staged concerts only a week apart— he did seem less confident than the other performers— but I still feel so lucky to have seen him in both.

Laura Osnes sparkles as the sensitive and vivacious Marguerite. Her voice is higher and lighter than how I’d heard the role performed before, but she can certainly belt out a tune when required. She gives nuance and genuine feeling to Marguerite’s inner conflict, even joining in a sword fight to defend her husband! Osnes shows remarkable poise, rarely consulting her script. She has especially great onstage chemistry with Corey Cott, who plays her little brother with earnest puppy dog eyes and a strong pop vocal.

Though I didn’t like all of the changes in the song listing, lyrics, and script, I was completely invested the entire time. The able and versatile ensemble took on a variety of roles, from Percy’s merry men to French guards. Drew Gehling gave a particularly scene-stealing turn in the dual roles of Robespierre (stern and sardonic) and the Prince of Wales (utterly zany and wearing a magnificent feathered hat). Backed by a chorus of over 200 people and a full orchestra, the music was nothing short of sublime.

The pared-down nature of the show mostly came across in costumes and props, or lack thereof- Percy’s elaborate 18th century suits were clearly necessary to the plot, but stood out against most characters’ contemporary clothing. Supporting characters merely threw on a cheap-looking accessory or two to connote a different character or disguise, and Marguerite wore modern ball gowns. Sometimes, the script referred to characters changing clothes without the actors actually doing so. Still, the movement and staging was more complex than I had expected, and I was particularly taken by the effective guillotine prop.

All in all, I left the theatre electrified and touched that this huge audience- David Geffen Hall holds 2,738 and this show was pretty much sold out- had all seen and evidently loved this musical that means so much to me, that over 200 people put in so much effort and enthusiasm to bring it to life, and that I got to be there.

Another thing that unexpectedly moved me was Percy’s character arc. I’ve always strangely related to Percy despite not being heroic, rich, or fashionable, but I AM known for being kinda silly and flamboyant. And like Percy, I like to think there’s more to me than that. Although Percy becomes the Pimpernel out of anguish and desperation, he seems to genuinely relish getting to act so weird and over-the-top. He seems so comfortable in his own skin. Even when his identity is unmasked, he continues to be outlandish, even forcing Chauvelin into a tap dance battle. He and his wife desperately love one another, his friends care about him and always have his back, and he’s able to be his true and complete self— strong, smart, and brave, yes, but also in touch with his feminine side, compassionate, theatrical, romantic, and generally outrageous. As someone who feels equally accepted by my loved ones despite my outsized personality, I love this non-conformist romantic hero who proves you don’t have to be macho and grimly stoic to save the day.

“And that is why the lord created men!” Percy sings after springing a trap on Chauvelin. Marguerite and Madame Tussaud, who both helped, cough. “And women!” he sings to cheers from the audience.

I loved this show. I wish you could have been there. I’m heading home on the bus right now and this piece reminded me more then anything how much I value and appreciate all of the people in my life. Onward, ho!

[ninasfireescape]

top 10 crazy ex girlfriend songs

this amazing show is coming to an end this week so because I love making lists, I thought I would recap my top 10 songs from it. This will be based on a number of things including catchiness, how well-written the lyrics are, how well-written the music is, how much they tackle social issues and how funny they are. This is just my opinion and it was a very tricky choice as there are so many good ones I had to miss out. And yes, I know most of them are from season 1 but you have to admit, that was when most of the songs were fabulous.

10. I’m a Good Person

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Ix3qJPS1b4

I can’t really say I find this song relatable without sounding like, well, not a good person. This song appears in an early episode of the show as Greg accuses Rebecca of being a bad person. In response she sings this but throughout the song, it becomes clearer and clearer that everything she is doing directly contradicts her words. This song is creative and has perfect comic timing with all the ways Rebecca manages to be a bad person, mic dropping into a drink, destroying the microphone, scattering chips everywhere as confetti and eventually pointing a knife at someone to make them call her a good person. It is also incredibly catchy. The reason I call it relatable is because I know I could be a less extreme version of this. I relate to Rebecca as a character a lot. In real life, my pet peeve is people who take pride in being mean. As a result, I try to be nice to everyone but the fact is I have the worst timing, I’m socially awkward and yes at times I can be mean about people. I can definitely imagine myself trying to cheer up a friend and saying something that upsets them even more by accident or trying to help someone clean up but just getting in their way or dropping everything.

9. Where’s the Bathroom?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVjq4v1B4pQ

As a Jewish girl, I love a good Jewish mother song. In one of my favourite episodes of all the show’s four seasons, Rebecca’s mother Naomi comes to visit for Chanukah (or Hanukkah). After she arrives, what follows is three straight minutes of her rapidly criticizing Rebecca and demanding to know where her bathroom while barely stopping to breathe, all accompanied by klezmer music. It is expertly composed and really showcases the talents of the actress.

8. The Math of Love Triangles

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=epuILDZ3KIo

I’m not sure quite what it is about this song but it really does it for me. It is one moment in the show where I have really considered how fantastic a singer Rachel Bloom is as well as an actress because the voice she does is hilarious. This song also has great lyric writing (all the triangle puns) and amazing sets and costumes.

7. You Stupid Bitch

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vrPrr4wmnJ4

After getting too deep into a Josh-involved scheme, Rebecca sings this powerful ballad of self-hatred. I’m going to be honest, I sing this song to myself a lot, every time I slightly mess up a social interaction. I love the chandelier made out of broken glass and Rachel Bloom can belt.

6. JAP Battle

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-TQmo5TvZQY

A rap battle between Rebecca and her arch nemesis, both of whom are ‘Jewish American Princesses.’ I love everything about this song: the Jewish puns, the roasts, the rapping abilities of both actresses, the bad dancing, Josh sliding around on a chair, everything. It has a reprise in season 4 as well where they compliment each other.

5. The Sexy Getting Ready Song

From the very first episode of the show. Rebecca gets ready for a party. It cuts between a dreamlike sequence, similar to the fantasy world of beauty adverts and the reality of Rebecca getting ready. It is completely on the nose about the message. We all know the struggle of burning yourself on a hair straightener. The song just sounds nice in itself as well and I always show people this song when I want to get them into the show. What really makes the song though is how the episode ends. This is terrible timing but the song features Nipsey Hussle who sadly was killed this week. He begins rapping only to see all the pain Rebecca must go through to get ready and leaves horrified. The episode ends with him having a list of ‘bitches’ to apologize to and it is comedy gold.

4. Put Yourself First

I really admire how this show does not shy away from issues which most forms of even feminist media do not address. Rebecca goes to a summer camp to teach girls female empowerment when she is really just there for Josh. The teenage girls find this out and tell her to ‘Put herself first…in a sexy way.’ From this, follows a horribly uncomfortable makeover sequence. The song is again very obvious about its message: that teenage girls are being taught it is empowering and self-care to make themselves attractive. It parodies songs by girl groups such as Fifth Harmony which I like because I used to listen to their music a lot. I think rather than criticizing the teenage girls themselves, it criticizes the culture that has forced them to think this way.

3. Getting’ Bi

Wow Alexia you like a song about being bisexual? I never would have guessed that! This was most people’s, including my first interaction with the show, seeing the music video being spread around on here. Rarely do I see a show use the dreaded B-word, let alone sing about it while dancing in front of a bi flag. The show has treated bisexuality so casually and so well with three bisexual characters! It has very positive representation and this song is just such a bop. Plus it has the line “It doesn’t take an intellectual to get that I’m bisexual.” If your show doesn’t have a bisexual character playing the saxophone, are you even trying?

2. Let’s Generalise About Men

80’s Music + Hating Men = Poetic Cinema. This song, as the title indicates, features the gurl squad making ridiculous generalizations about men. Yes, we have all done this. The song, though acknowledging we can go too far sometimes, does not condemn us for this behaviour as it explains this is a “primal ritual we need now and then”.

1.  Remember That We Suffered

This song is criminally underrated although I suppose it is a hard song to understand the humour of unless you are Jewish and have lived through every festival of the year being about a story of our suffering. Yes, it does require quite a dark sense of humour. But then again, the dancing in it makes me nostalgic for my Bat Mitzvah, it has Patti Lupone, and it has the line “We sing in a minor key to remember that we suffered.” The writers really get it.

Special Mentions: Friendtopia, I Go to the Zoo, I’m the Villain in my Own Story, Who’s the New Guy?, Ping Pong Girl.

[blueseasfanfics]

Halloween Treats

Pairing: Loki X Reader

Word Count: 1526

Warnings: Fluff

A/N: Hello everyone! I still count it as Halloween if I’m eating Halloween candy (that I bought. When it wasn’t 3 AM). Go to the end for an important announcement!

You like Halloween. Just not the parties that come with it. You weren't sure what always rubbed you the wrong way. You think its a mix between way too many people forced together, the ridiculous amounts of alcohol making everyone acting equally ridiculous, and the festive touch of being forced to wear a costume. Of course, Tony always had a huge Halloween party at the Tower every year, and all the Avengers were invited. More like forced to come, but invited nonetheless. As you got dressed, you tried to hype yourself up for this year's party. This year, the tower decided to dress up as each other, and everyone pulled a name out of the hat. You pulled out Loki, and you're really looking forward to his face when he sees you. Mainly because you made him look ridiculous. You had the flashiest gold heels on, that had straps that twisted all the way up to your mid-calf, and a short, green sequined dress that looked so over the top you might as well be floating above the Tower. The finishing touch was a pair of cardboard horns, spray painted gold. You had originally wanted to steal his real horns, but that would have just ruined the surprise, considering you were the only one that was stupid enough to even attempt it. No, you'll go ahead with the cardboard. Looking at yourself in the mirror, you even realize it all looks..good. You had meant for it to be a trashy version of Loki, but instead you somehow managed to find something you could even see him wearing. ... Ok, maybe not, but it's still a funny image. He could probably only wear this dress as a shirt anyway, so maybe stop imagining that for now. For now. Looking at the clock, you leave, meeting up with Natasha in the hallway. She must have gotten Clint, because she's in an all purple get-up, ridiculous sunglasses on, and what seems to be his actual bow in her hand. You weren't the only one wanting to steal from their partner, it seems. Looping your arm in hers, you both walk down to the main room, where the party has already started. Approaching the stairwell leading down into the pit of people, the din of their conversation and laughter wafting up the stairs, you take a deep breath. Quickly, both you and Natasha walk down the spiral stairs, trying your hardest not to stumble. As you get to the bottom, you look for people you recognize, and noticing how every single Avenger really took their costume seriously. Tony had gotten Bucky, and he wore a silver suit arm, gotten an old wig, and was dressed in sweatpants and a tank top, with Bucky having painted his arm (and pretty much the rest of his body) red. In the distance, you saw Thor with a curly red wig and leather gear, Clint with his already short hair dyed blonde and every piece of American flag clothing you can buy at Walmart on his body, and Steve with a long wig and what seems to be the front rooms red curtain pinned to his back. Then, that means, Loki is.. Whirling around to the corner, you see Loki, already looking at you with a bemused smile. His longer hair is pinned up in a bun, and he must have raided your drawer because you are 100% certain that he's wearing your sweater and blue sweatpants. That jerk, he's going to stretch out the fabric. He mouths from across the crowded floor, it full of tipsy people dancing and milling around, but you still feel like you can hear him as clear as day. "Come here." Smiling to yourself, you walk to him confidently, standing in front of him and looking him over. "I expect those back by tomorrow. Those are my comfy clothes." You remark, and he chuckles. "And I expect that dress myself. It just fits my personality so well." He reaches to the side when a waiter comes by with sparkling rosé on trays, and grabs two, offering you one. You accept, and sip it as he continues looking you over, rendering you as pink as your drink. "You like what you see?" You say after a minute and he shrugs. "Would it be a compliment or narcissism to tell you that you look beautiful tonight?" He drinks slowly, looking at you over the brim of his glass, as you choke slightly. "Well, I guess it would be a little bit of both. But a thank you either way." You say timidly, and he laughs a little again. You take a gamble and move next to him, leaning against the wall and staring out into the crowd. Currently, Thor is in a drinking contest, the slumped over losers of the two previous dares on a couch next to him. Cheers ensue as his third victim laughs and lays his head down on the table. "This is boring." Loki sighs, his fingers fiddling with his empty glass. "Oh? Is this party too tame for your Asgardian standards?" "Yes, actually. Asgardian parties are much more lively. Normally I would be engaged in a fight to the death with someone by now." "What?" "Nothing. You seem bored as well, or you wouldn't be talking to me." "Ah yes, because I spend most of my time with you on a regular basis because you're boring." You roll your eyes, but Loki only chuckles and grabs hold of your wrist in nimble fingers, pulling away from the wall and bringing you with him. "I like this song." He yells over his shoulder as he pulls you closer to the dance floor. "How much have you drank tonight? More than Thor?" You yell back incredulously, but he only pulls you into the middle of the dance floor and turns to you, taking your glass and his and throwing them into..nothing. It always entrances you when he uses his magic like that. He puts his hand on your waist, and pulls you closer until your against him, his mouth next to your ear. "Hey there." He murmurs, and you chuckle nervously. "Maybe you actually have drank more than Thor.." "The only intoxicating thing to me is you." You can only press your face into his throat, your ear on his shoulder, swaying to the music with him to one of the rarer slow songs on Tony's playlist. "Why do you say things like that?" You ask softly, and he sighs. "Because you refuse to notice subtle hints. Or big ones, apparently." "What do you mean by that?" "Mortal, how many people do you think are allowed in my bedroom? To touch my things? Hel, to even touch me?" "Well, I would think anyone you invited to your room which has to be-" "You. Only you. You are the one that has a permanent access to my being, and it frustrates me that you will not see it. Unless, of course, you do not wish for it then it's perfectly alright and-" "No. I want it." You blurt out. His hand around your waist clenches slightly, pulling you even closer to him, until the only way you can be any closer is by stepping on his toes. "I'm glad to hear that." He murmurs against your cheek, his lips seeming to burn a hole in your skin, and when the heat gets too unbearable, you move your lips to his. You seem to have taken him by surprise, since at first he doesn't make a motion, but a split second later he's taken your face in both hands and kissing you back hungrily. Both of you forget about the rest of the party around you, the music and voices melting into nothing as the only thing you can focus on is him and how his lips feel against yours. The only thing breaking you apart is Thor's loud cheer as he smashes down his mug, shattering it and sending glass everywhere. The screams that arise from this make you cover your ears, and Loki quickly wraps his frame around yours and after your next blink, you're both standing in the kitchen. "When my brother does that, it's usually time to leave." "It's not time to leave when the fighting to the death starts?" You laugh slightly, and he brushes it aside as he lifts your chin up and kisses you again, gently backing you against the counter. "Well, there are you two. And thank God, do you know how hard it was to rig a hat so you would pull each other? I have no idea how Voldemort did it." Tony has staggered up to the kitchen, rifling through the fridge. "You're not supposed to say his name." Loki growls, pulling away from you slightly and you gasp. "You finally read the books!" You say excitedly, and Tony rolls his eyes. "True love, isn't it? Was the counter when you two are done." His words fell on deaf ears, as both of you are in an heated conversation about Snape, interrupted with kisses whenever there was a pause.

Hey y'all. I'm back. With some good and bad news. Good news first: I am back, and I am writing! I will trying to get into my regular ways very soon, as I have finally finished moving in and getting my life set-up (no job yet, as I am still a couple months short away from being an adult), but writing this actually came very easily to me so I'm hoping I get better quality works and more, soon. Bad news: I may be done writing Loki. I have felt for a while now that I haven't been writing Loki, that I haven;t gotten his personality down correctly or his mannerisms, and I would like to work more with writing him and reading him more so I can truly put his being into words. Until then, I will be writing primarily Bucky, but I would love to know who you all would like to read! And again, don't worry, you'll be getting some Loki sometimes too, just not as my main focus. Anyway, that's all. Hello again y'all!

TAGLIST @fuckthatfeeling @drakesfiance @ihavenofilter @nalokoniloki

[askcarlyle]

[A contribution (in conjunction with @askbarnum) to FanFicFeb on @theothersidediscord for Prompt #14 (Soulmate). Edited from the live version, which appeared on server earlier this month.]

Barnum

Wanders into the office a warm afternoon, hair still slick with sweat from rehearsals and puts down a mug of coffee and a muffin in front of Phillip

Time for a break from those finance forms. You've been staring at them for over an hour.

Carlyle 

pushes aside the papers, shaking head

That's because I'm still not sure why you ordered costume beards for the elephants. They're shedding hair everywhere and you need five people to tie each one on.

Barnum

Hey, sometimes you just have to trust me. Thought you'd know that by now.

Beams at him smugly, playfully grabbing his shoulder and giving it a little shake

Let's take a walk, Phil. I wanna show you something anyway and you look like you could use the air. You get any more pale and you'll blind people when the spotlight hits you.

Tugs him to his feet gently

Carlyle 

comes along gamely but holds up one finger in protest at the last comment

New York City air is hardly the healthiest panacea one can offer, you know. I'm pretty sure many places would turn one green rather than pale.

Barnum

Raises his eyebrows sassy at him as they exit the circus and ushers him into a carriage. Plonking the muffin into his lap as he sits down

Eat, I didn’t see you grab any lunch.

Taps the top of the carriage and tells the driver where to go, sitting back and bumping shoulders with Phillip affectionately before pressing a kiss to his cheek

I've been working on this in the mornings all month.

Carlyle

looks up from muffin, startled

Exactly how early were you waking up? You've been in at the normal time every day. Except that one time you got sidetracked by the patterned waistcoat sale in the warehouse district. That delivery never arrived, by the way. I have no idea why.

Barnum 

Yes I did notice. Mysterious.

Sips from the mans coffee cup before handing it back to him

4am, you can tell the bits I've worked on by candlelight. It's been worth it though.

As the carriage comes to a stop he dusts the crumbs off his jacket, opening the door for Phillip to reveal their train. Originally black now brightly painted in red. Many of the carriages are still unfinished, charcoal sketches of lions and oddities covering the sides. The very first carriage is the only one completely finished and painted in vibrant tones. A carriage sized painting of Phillip in his ringmaster costume gracing the front, next to him Barnum himself.

Carlyle 

brushes crumbs off lap before looking up, and stares for an extended minute

You did this all by yourself? It's incredible...

steps a bit closer and puts out hand, about to touch, before drawing back at the last minute

Is it finished?

Barnum 

It’s dry, don’t worry. Finished the last glaze this morning.

Leans his head against Phillip's shoulder fondly

I was going to wait until the whole thing was finished but I think if I do everything myself it might take the rest of my life so I've hired a few artists to finish up the rest. You were looking a little low this morning and I wanted to cheer you up.

Carlyle

reaches out again and runs hand over his larger-than-life portrait, lingering over its raised hand

You painted the ring, too. Right there on the front of the train.

Barnum 

He shrugs one shoulder, almost a little sheepish that he noticed, and glances at his boots for a moment with a chuckle

I can paint over it....if it makes you uncomfortable. I'm just. I'm proud to be engaged to you. I couldn’t bear to leave the ring out. It's a symbol of how much you mean to me. Besides, people aren’t going to know, right? They'll probably just think it's yours from Miss Wheeler or something. It's hardly the most scandalising thing I've done.

Meets his eyes again. Excited but vulnerable. Eager for his verdict on the piece

Carlyle

shakes head and leans over to pick up an abandoned brush and dip it in gold paint before adding a similar ring onto Barnum's portrait

Just one... little... addition. Anyone who does figure it out might as well be thoroughly scandalized rather than just halfway.

takes Barnum's hand and impulsively paints a matching golden adornment on his actual hand

I might have picked one for you a while back as well, but never quite found the right moment to give it to you, so this will have to do until we get home later.

looks Barnum in the eye, still holding hand and giving its scarred knuckles an affectionate kiss

Now it's absolutely perfect. 

Barnum 

Stares at the wet ring of shimmering gold paint on his finger, where the faint dent left from so many years of wearing a wedding ring before was lingering. His eyes misting up after a while of silence, a little speechless and clearly rather touched.

Chuckles loudly, throwing his arms around Phillip and swinging him around enthusiastically. When his feet touch the floor once more he immediately presses a loving kiss to his lips

You are ridiculous. I love you.

Carlyle 

Hmm. Learned from the greatest, so I'm told.

wraps arms loosely around the back of Barnum's neck and sways in time to music in his head

[FTB]

[upontheshelfreviews]

Merry Christmas everyone! To conclude this month of merrymaking we’re looking at an animated Christmas cult classic that I have a bit of a soft spot for. But perhaps it’s best to start at the beginning:

ETA Hoffman’s “The Nutcracker and the Mouse King” is one of my favorite fantasy stories, though chances are you’re more familiar with the famous ballet by Tchaikovsky that it inspired. The music is gorgeous and instantly recognizable, but few know the actual story of The Nutcracker beyond what your average community production rolls out every December. Much of the plot plays out like a variation of Beauty and the Beast with a protagonist akin to The Wizard of Oz’s Dorothy and story elements that wouldn’t feel out of place in a Grimms’ fairytale. Sadly, most of those details were lost in the translation from book to light holiday entertainment. Not that I’m complaining, I love the ballet, but there’s so much more to its origins that people aren’t usually interested in delving into.

I say all this because today’s movie, The Nutcracker Prince, is one of the very few filmic adaptations that pays faithful tribute to both its source material and its theatrical counterpart. In spite of – or perhaps because of – the popularity of the ballet, there’s been only a handful of film versions of Hoffman’s The Nutcracker (or at least a handful compared to something like A Christmas Carol). How good you find each of them to be depends upon your taste and the production value. I’ve found remarkably little about the making of this particular adaption, but that probably has to do with the fact that it was barely a blip on the box office radar. Released through Warner Brothers (which itself would issue another Nutcracker movie starring Maculay Culkin six years later), this was the only full-length animated feature created by Canada’s Lacewood Productions. A shame, really, because looking at The Nutcracker Prince you can see the studio’s potential. But thanks to the home video circuit, the movie has found a new life as a nostalgic Christmas classic for 90’s kids like myself. Let’s unwrap the reasons why, shall we?

If there’s one thing I appreciate about The Nutcracker Prince, it’s how it plays around with the music order to emphasize a scene’s mood rather than slavishly follow the original score. Instead of the recognizable jovial overture piping over the main titles, we have the Snowflake Waltz from the finale of Act 1, building an aura of mystery and magic to lure us into the story. A series of cross-hatched stills introduce us to our cast and characters, and I tell you, when you recognize these names you will not be able to look at this movie the same way. If I told someone that Anne of Green Gables, Jack Bauer, Lawrence of Arabia, Jimmy Neutron’s grandma and several prominent cast members from Canada’s Saturday morning fixture The Raccoons shared the screen together once, they’d think I was crazy, but as you’ll see it’s the honest to Zeus truth.

Our story begins proper with Clara Stahlbaum (Meagan Follows) and her younger brother Fritz delivering last-minute gifts to their neighbors on Christmas Eve. They race through the icy streets of Germany until they reach the shop of eccentric family friend Uncle Drosselmeier (Peter Boretski), a clockmaker and expert craftsman of mechanical toys. Drosselmeier greets the children and they invite him to come light up the Christmas tree with the family, but he enigmatically tells them he has to prepare for his nephew. This comes as news to Clara and Fritz, since they’ve known Drosselmeier for their whole lives and have never heard him mention a nephew before. Drosselmeier sends them on their way promising he’ll be at the Stahlbaum’s party that evening. Once they’re gone, he hints that there may be something magical in the air this Christmas…

“Blasted pixie dust everywhere! Once the holidays are done I’ve got to get the place fumigated!”

On their way home Clara and Fritz debate what Uncle Drosselmeier’s big annual present he makes for the family will be this time. Fritz, the little future warlord that he is, wishes for a working fort with a mechanical army, while Clara dreams of an enchanted garden where swans in golden necklaces glide across the water. This conversation is a little holdover from the Hoffman story that I like. One of the most difficult challenges every writer faces is writing natural sounding dialogue for children; while Hoffman’s dialogue is a bit stilted by the conventions of the era, the meaning still comes through. Fritz laughs at Clara’s fantasy but because he finds the idea of swans wearing jewelry more ludicrous than a magic garden, which is how an ebullient boy like him would think.

Back at the Stahlbaums, preparations for the Christmas party are underway. The parents give their children their presents: older sister Louise (who’s often excised from other adaptations) receives a pretty new dress, Fritz a hobby horse and toy soldier gear, and Clara a pair of ballet slippers and a new doll she christens Marie. I have to wonder if this is some kind weird in-joke since in the story, the main character is called Marie and the doll she receives is the one who’s named Clara. What happened during the process of making this movie that resulted in their names being switched? Clara is thrilled since these slippers bring her one step closer to her dreams of joining the royal ballet, but feels a touch bemused when she overhears her mother getting choked up at the notion that this may be Clara’s last doll.

The party arrives, including Louise’s boyfriend Eric. Clara and Fritz tease the lovebirds (though to be frank, anyone who wears a powdered wig twelve years out of fashion to something that isn’t a costume party deserves to be ridiculed) but something about their shared intimacy stirs something within Clara. This on top of the adult party guests commenting on how fast she is growing marks her entrance into that state of melancholy and confusion that comes from standing between childhood and adulthood and not knowing where you belong. Clara’s age is never mentioned though I suspect she’s roughly twelve or thirteen, right on the cusp of adolescence and about the time where that mindset begins to sink in. She still plays with dolls and treats them like they were alive, but imagines a future as an adult. There’s a growing sadness over the impending decision between the two that she subconsciously acknowledges through her playing with Marie. This theme isn’t present in the Hoffman story (Marie is a confirmed seven year old in the prime of juvenescence) but it’s been incorporated into the Maurice Sendak retelling a couple of years prior to The Nutcracker Prince and I like its inclusion here as well.

“I wonder if this is anything like what my pen pal Wendy went through with that Peter boy…nah, you’re overthinking it, Clara.”

But there’s no time for her to ponder the implications as a crack of thunder, gust of wind and explosion of fireworks marks the arrival of the final party guest – Drosselmeier. He comes bearing his greatest creation, an enchanting music box castle complete with marching soldiers, seven swans a-swimming, and figures dancing inside the ballroom. In another humorous scene from the original story, Clara and Fritz fawn over the castle while frustrating Drosselmeier with their requests to make the automated figures do more, leading him to go on a brief “kids today don’t appreciate shit” rant.

As the party guests waltz to the strains of more Tchaikovsky, Clara wanders by the tree and spies a present she hadn’t noticed before – a nutcracker in the shape of a soldier. He’s not the most handsome toy in the box, but there’s something charming about him that she is drawn to. Drosselmeier confesses that he’s just part of his gift for the family and demonstrates how he works. On seeing the Nutcracker, Fritz wrestles him out of Clara’s arms and insists he has a go. But because there are no nuts left, he tries one of his toy cannonballs and breaks its jaw. Drosselmeier cheers Clara up by telling a story of how the Nutcracker came to look as he does. And this is where things get…weird.

Now I don’t mind the inclusion of the story-within-a-story. I’m happy they go into how the Nutcracker was cursed unlike most other versions, and there’s some good gags thrown in that make me chuckle. It’s how they go about it that I take some issue with. First, look at the movie’s style looked so far.

The character designs are clearly inspired by Disney – big eyes, soft rounder faces, realistic body proportions for the main characters, only slightly exaggerated for the lesser ones. The backgrounds are warmly lit and richly detailed, like an early work by Thomas Kincade. Overall it feels like something out of a classic storybook.

Now here’s some screencaps from Drosselmeier’s story.

“All right, who changed the channel to Cartoon Network?”

The scene doesn’t even look like it’s from the same movie. It goes from feature film quality to a Saturday morning cartoon, and that’s not entirely coincidental. Lacewood Productions grew out of Hinton Animation Studios which primarily made, you guessed it, cartoons for tv. And Hinton Animation itself had its roots in Atkinson Film-Arts, the studio that produced The Raccoons, hence why some of the cast makes appearances. But because I couldn’t find anything on the making of The Nutcracker Prince, we’ll never know if they went this route because the budget ran out, or the animators didn’t feel comfortable drawing the entire movie in the Disney house style and worked out some kind of compromise, or they just wanted the reveal of the Nutcracker’s human form at the end to be an even bigger surprise. Given some time and creativity they might have been able to come up with something better. You could argue this is how Clara envisions the story playing out in her head, but I don’t think a child from the 1800’s would imagine a fairy tale in the style of Danny Antonucci. In fact, if you played music from Ed Edd and Eddy over this part it wouldn’t feel out of place. Everything is played up for nothing but laughs, not even the Nutcracker’s transformation into a lifeless object, which should be an emotional gut punch. And I’d be ok with all this if it was a short sequence, but it lasts fifteen minutes. That might not seem like long, but since this movie is only seventy-five minutes that means it takes up a good portion of its first half. Plus the cuts back and forth between the story to it being told reminds you of how jarring the whole sequence is compared to the rest of the film.

But on to the story itself. Drosselmeier’s tale takes place in a faraway kingdom belonging to a King who I can only describe Yosemite Sam in his golden years right down to the ornery western accent (it wasn’t until doing my research that I discovered he’s voiced by the Texan monster from the Beetlejuice cartoon which certainly explains it), an extreme doormat Queen, and their daughter, the “beautiful” but very spoiled and unfortunately named Princess Pirlipat. They have in their employ a world-famous clock maker and magician coincidentally also named Drosselmeier and his apprentice, his shy nephew Hans (Kiefer Sutherland).

“Patience, friends. The joke you’re all expecting is coming.”

The occasion on which this flashback takes place is the King’s birthday, and the Queen has put in an order for a cake made out of his favorite food, blue cheese (would that make it a blue cheesecake?) This has the unwanted side effect of drawing out every mouse in the palace. Led by the Mouse Queen (legendary comedienne Phyllis Diller) and her dimwitted son (Mike MacDonald), they pounce upon the cake just as the Queen is putting on the finishing touches.

With no time left to make a new cake, the Queen is forced to send it out to the King and his party guests. This disaster is almost salvaged by a sycophantic Emperor’s New Clothes-style response to the dessert, but Pirlipat ruins everything by whining how she refuses to eat that repulsive offal. The King promotes Drosselmeier to the post of Royal Exterminator and soon all the mice are caught – except the Mouse Queen and her son. She takes her revenge out on Pirlipat; using her dark magic she curses the princess with extreme ugliness, cementing it with a bite to the foot.

Oh please, that’s just Kellyanne Conway before her makeup.

Eager to blame somebody for Pirlipat’s state, the King is ready to execute Drosselmeier until the Queen suddenly intervenes and begs him to consider giving the clockmaker some time to reverse the curse. It was at this moment I realized the King and Queen here are like if the monarchs from Alice in Wonderland had their personalities switched. They even have the same body types as their Disney counterparts.

The King reluctantly acquiesces, but gives Drosselmeier and Hans no more than…well…did I already mention Kiefer Sutherland is in this movie?

“Your obligatory reference humor, all wrapped up in one neat package. Merry Christmas!”

So Hans and Drosselmeier study the princess to figure out a way to break the spell, not helped by Pirlipat’s constant ear-bleedingly grating crying. Her only comfort is Hans feeding her nuts he cracks for her himself. Inspired, Drosselmeier researches well into the night and discovers the cure for Pirlipat’s condition – the Krakatooth Nut, the hardest nut in the world. It can only be cracked open by a young man who’s never shaved or worn boots and they must take exactly seven steps to and from the person they’re feeding the nut to with their eyes shut and without stumbling, which even by fairy tale logic is some damn arbitrary rules.

The King invites noblemen from around the world to crack the Krakatooth with the promise of marrying Pirlipat and becoming heir to the kingdom if they succeed, though he has them and the rest of the court blindfolded so they won’t be scared off by her hideousness. Unfortunately each man who makes an attempt winds up with a mouth full of broken teeth. The Mouse Queen, confident in her evil plan, watches the misery play out with delight. Hans, however, decides to give it a try, and to Drosselmeier, the royal family, and the Mouse Queen and Prince’s surprise, he succeeds. Pirlipat is transformed back into her normal, terrible old self, however the court is too busy fawning over their restored icon to notice what happens next.

Enraged over being foiled, the Mouse Queen casts a curse on Hans to make him “the prince of the dolls”. Before he can take his final step backward, she bites his foot and he is transformed into a wide-smiling nutcracker. In his new form he accidentally knocks over a line of busts domino-style, the last of which the Mouse Queen is too late to escape from. I love it when villains are hit by instant karma. Alas, Pirlipat takes one look at Hans and refuses to marry a doll that’s not even half as ugly as she was moments ago.

Yep. Totally unmarriageable material.

On seeing his prospective son-in law for himself, the King accuses Drosselmeier of trying to trick his daughter into marrying one of his contraptions. He has the poor guy who’s shown nothing but years of loyalty and service to his outlandish demands banished forthwith while he and his wife and daughter celebrate their own selfish victory. I always hated how they never earned some kind of punishment for their behavior, but considering the boundary-shifting turmoil Europe endured before, during and after this tale was written, it’s more than likely these foolish monarchs will get what’s coming to them in the worst possible way down the line.

Enjoy your power while you can, assholes. Come the Napoleonic wars, you’re all royally screwed.

As for the Mouse Prince, he mourns his mother for all of ten seconds before realizing her death makes him the new Mouse King. He declares to Drosselmeier that he’ll have his revenge on the Nutcracker – not for killing mommie dearest but for smashing the end of his tail when the busts fell and making it go crooked.

With the story done, we abruptly return to the party and Clara expressing her disappointment in Hans’ unfair fate. Drosselmeier assures her that while Hans may be stuck as a Nutcracker, he’s still the rightful ruler of the magical kingdom of the dolls and the spell over him can be broken, but only if he defeats the Mouse King and wins the hand of a fair maiden. I love Clara’s reaction to this; she rolls her eyes and wonders why all fairy tales have the same solution.

Long after the party has ended and the Stahlbaums are fast asleep, a restless Clara sneaks downstairs with her kitty Pavlova to check on her Nutcracker. She introduces him to his new subjects, her toys – Marie, her old matronly doll Trudy, and Pantaloon, the ancient captain of Fritz’s toy soldiers. Taken by a music box’s melody, Clara shares a romantic song and dance with the Nutcracker to the tune of the Waltz of the Flowers, not unlike the one Louise and Eric had earlier.

And for those of you watching, yes, Clara is clearly rotoscoped when she’s dancing. I’m not against rotoscoping as long as animators don’t rely too heavily on it (COUGHBAKSHICOUGH), though the use of it here as well as in one other scene emphasizes how uneven the rest of the film’s animation is under scrutiny. I do wish there was a full version of this song somewhere though because it’s quite pretty.

The music comes to a sudden halt as Pavlova breaks an ornament. Clara quickly stashes the Nutcracker our of fear of being caught out of bed, but before she can return upstairs she’s startled by the famous ghostly image of Drosselmeier atop the grandfather clock in place of the decorative owl, his cloak billowing out like wings. He showers the entire parlor in pixie dust, and goofy-looking mice armed with forks and needles pop up from of every crevice. Pavlova scares them away from Clara until one arrives to scare him back – the Mouse King, looking far more intimidating than he did in the flashback.

One is an animation student’s design project, the other is Ratigan’s cousin. Would you believe they’re one and the same?

Drosselmeier also douses the toy cabinet with his magic and brings them all to life. The Nutcracker is woken up and, having no idea of what’s happened since the incident with Pirlipat, quickly has to come to grips with his new form and the fact that a sociopathic mouse has sworn a vendetta against him. And you thought the Hangover guys had it bad. Marie and Trudy plead him to take up his mantle as Prince of the Dolls and fight despite his inexperience. Fritz’s soldiers vow their loyalty and Pantaloon (voiced by Peter O’Freaking Toole) is made second-in-command. Though rather than do any actual fighting the old coot drones on and on in Shakespeare references.

“So we’re not watching Ratatouille Peter O’Toole so much as Man of La Mancha Peter O’Toole. Imagine my delight.”

Actually, like the Marie/Clara name switch before, I have to wonder if this odd characteristic of Pantaloon is another subtle in-joke or reference towards the original story. Hoffman was a big Shakespeare fan and often referenced him in his writings, including The Nutcracker. In the book when Fritz’s soldiers desert the battle, the Nutcracker cries out the famous line from Richard the Third, “My kingdom for a horse!” (paired down here to a simple “Come back!” when the toy horses run free). In a weird way, having Pantaloon riff on Shakespeare is a nod to Hoffman. On top of that, one of his first lines is “All for one and one for all”, which everyone remembers from Alexandre Dumas’ The Three Musketeers. Years after Hoffman’s Nutcracker was published, Dumas wrote his own version of the story which is the lighter, softer one that the ballet takes the most cues from. So whether or not this was intentional is up for debate, but if it was I give the writers all the credit in the world for honoring both authors of The Nutcracker in such an obscure and subtle way.

The battle between the mice and the dolls promises to be an exciting one. The problem is once it gets going, it’s so wildly unfocused. The mice and dolls run around each other aimlessly firing and flailing at will. Clara could end all this just by kicking the mice to the other side of the room, but she just stands to the side and giggles at everything happening. Then there’s Marie, who in spite of Trudy strongarming her into helping the fight barely does anything other than scream in a stereotypical Southern accent and complain about how all this fighting is spoiling her complexion, like if she were a more spoiled version of Princess and the Frog’s Charlotte LaBouff. She’s marginally more tolerable that Pirlipat. Granted she does have one funny moment where her dress gets splattered with cheese and that’s what pushes her into a violent rage against the mice.

“And you will know my name is the Lord & Taylor when I lay my vengeance upon thee!”

Anyway, the mice hold down Nutcracker long enough for the Mouse King to have a go at killing him. Clara finally intervenes, throwing her slipper at the Mouse King and knocking him off his high toy horse. But she slips on a marble into the clock and falls unconscious.

Clara wakes up back in her bed on Christmas morning, her head wrapped up in bandages. Nobody believes what she saw the previous night, owing her delusions to a fever sustained from her injury. Drosselmeier pays Clara a surprise visit and presents her with a newly fixed Nutcracker. Grateful as she is, Clara calls him out for not doing anything when his own nephew was in danger, though Drosselmeier states he’s not the one who has the power to save him. Clara’s mother insists she stay in bed and do nothing for the rest of the day, which, come on Mom. Worst Christmas ever.

That evening the Mouse King also pops into Clara’s room to return her slipper. Awfully decent of him, all things considering. After making more big talk about how he’s gonna turn Nutcracker into a pile of splinters, Clara lures him into her drawer with the promise of some chocolates Fritz left her earlier and traps him in there. She flees downstairs to hide Nutcracker, but the Mouse King has mastered offscreen teleportation and threatens to kill Pavlova if she doesn’t hand him over. The owl on top of the clock changes into Drosselmeier and once again he brings the toys to life. This time it’s just for moral support as Nutcracker and the Mouse King battle mano-e-mouso up the Christmas tree. It’s a big improvement over the first battle. There’s more focus since it’s just the two of them fighting and there’s creative use of the terrain and presents around it. My one complaint is that Nutcracker doesn’t drunkenly tackle the tree itself at one point, but we can’t have everything we want for Christmas.

Whomsoever pulls the sword from the spruce shall become king of all Toyland! Oops, wrong mythos.

At one point the Mouse King nearly runs through a defenseless Nutcracker but Pantaloon bravely intervenes at the cost of a nasty back wound. Finally, Nutcracker delivers the killing blow and the Mouse King’s body crashes to the floor. The mice scatter and the toys declare victory. But Pantaloon’s batteries are about to expire, and since the Stahlbaums out of double-A’s the only way to save him is to get him to the Land of the Dolls; the gate to which is coincidentally right through Drosselmeier’s castle. Nutcracker eagerly invites Clara to join them, and after saying some mysterious something or other about time, Drosselmeier shrinks her down to their size with magic. They enter the castle, and Pavlova goes to inspect the Mouse King, which, for a decomposing corpse, seems to be growling an awful lot…

In the castle Marie gets sidetracked by the waltzing gentlemen while the rest continue on. They reach some lovely winter gardens where the snow is made of coconut icing and the royal swans Clara has fantasized earlier wait to take them on their journey. Since Marie is too late to join them, she has to settle for being dragged through the air on a common mallard.

Still better than flying United Airlines.

The swans soar over a forest of Christmas trees up to the stars and through a magical waterfall that changes Clara and Nutcracker into attire befitting royalty and restores Pantaloon to health. They all land at a beautiful palace made of sweets where Nutcracker’s subjects give them a warm welcome. Clara and Nutcracker head out on to the ballroom floor to dance to my favorite piece from the ballet – scratch that, of any classical composer – the achingly beautiful Pas De Deux.

Like Clara’s solo before, the choreography is rotoscoped, but they’re much more clever at hiding it this time around. The dancing plays out like a dreamy montage with the moves fading in and out from one another, alternating between pink and blue silhouettes, minimally colored full-body shots, and more detailed animation reserved for closeups. There’s also an old-fashioned Vaseline-on-the-lens-style filter on, the kind normally reserved for romantic moments from Hollywood’s golden age which befits the tone they’re going for.

With the dance done, Nutcracker asks Clara to stay with him and rule the Land of the Dolls forever. Clara is sorely tempted, but something holds her back from saying yes. The idea of living in a candy castle with her dream prince and childhood friends is too good to be true, a perfect happy ending. And that’s just it – an ending. Clara has dreams beyond that will never come true if she settles, dreams of seeing the world and being a prima ballerina which can only happen if she chooses to grow up, and she wants to in spite of how much she’s fallen in love with Nutcracker. It would have hit harder if this theme of choosing to mature vs. clinging to girlhood was explored more throughout the movie, but the point still stands.

Now that the desire to grow up has taken hold, Pantaloon, Marie and Trudy change back into ordinary toys, the spark of life bestowed by childhood imagination put out. One by one, the denizens of the doll kingdom drop like flies, their number growing as Clara keeps justifying her refusal to stay.

And as if things couldn’t get any worse, guess who crashes the party?

Ohhhhhh shiiiiit….

Up to this point the Mouse King was a comical villain who was difficult to take seriously. But now here he is like Ratigan in the final act of The Great Mouse Detective, bereft of his senses and embracing his inner animal. His chest wound is still bleeding, his breathing is ragged, he doesn’t even talk, and he shuffles forward like a zombie, but nothing holds him back his single-minded pursuit of Clara. You can’t even tell if he’s going after her because he recognizes the part she played in his eventual demise or he’s desperate to stick it to Nutcracker before he drops dead. Hell, maybe in his near-death state he’s so delusional that he thinks Clara IS Nutcracker. That makes it even more terrifying; he knows he’s dying but refuses to go without taking someone, anyone out with him in as violent a manner as possible.

The circle-eyes kind of kill it for me, though. I mean, when a bad guy or monster is cornering you in their final moments, which gaze is more threatening – bloodshot, glowing and blank, or colorful cartoon rings? Unless their name is Judge Doom, the answer should always be the former.

Defenseless, all Clara can do is pelt dessert at him. But it’s only delaying the inevitable. And when Nutcracker tries to help, the change slowly and painfully takes over him and he is forced to watch as his mortal enemy corners his true love, resulting in the most arresting visual of the movie.

Nutcracker gasps out Clara’s name one last time and morphs fully back into wood. A single tear remains on his face, the only sign he was ever truly alive.

The Mouse King traps Clara on the balcony, lunges at her and goes over the railing, finally taking himself out with a classic Disney villain fall. Clara pulls herself back up and sees the palace is now completely abandoned and filling up with mist. She cries desperately for her Nutcracker as the final heartrending strings of the Pas De Deux play, and the scene to slowly fades to black.

This scene…this whole scene from the moment the Pas De Deux began…how it got me when I was a kid. It broke my heart and did an echappé all over the pieces. Everything from the visuals to the acting and especially the music still punches me in the feels. For all my gripes about the inconsistent animation, this is the part of the movie where it absolutely shines. And thanks to the ramped up tension that follows every note, I’ve always associated this piece of Tchaikovsky’s score with poignant dramatic moments. Say what you will about the past hour of this movie, it is worth it for this excellent emotional climax.

Fritz bursts into Clara’s room startling her awake and declares Pavlova killed a crooked-tailed mouse by the clockwork castle. Clara dashes downstairs to the toy cabinet but finds Nutcracker is gone. She sprints out of the house straight to Drosselmeier’s shop. Oddly enough, he seems to be expecting her. Clara begs Drosselmeier to tell her if the story about the Nutcracker and the Mouse King is true for the sake of her sanity. But then, a handsome young man enters from the other room.

Drosselmeier introduces him as his nephew, Hans. Despite this apparently being their first time meeting, Hans greets her with familiarity, even bowing to her just as her Nutcracker Prince did. And his voice is one Clara would know anywhere. She in turn gives the perfect response.

“Hello…Nutcracker.”

If the climax already left me nearly speechless than the finale takes whatever little words are left straight from my mouth. As far as endings go it’s near flawless. I’d say The Nutcracker Prince borrowed from Disney’s Beauty and the Beast if it weren’t for the fact that it came out the year before Beauty did. Like The Wizard of Oz, it knows how to leave you on an emotional high note. While it’s supposed to be ambiguous, it’s the kind where deep down you just know the real answer without any explanations given.

“Though I can only imagine how awkward it would have been after she said that if it did turn out to be a dream.”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP CYNICISM YOU WILL NOT RUIN THIS MOMENT FOR ME!!”

And because this was the 90’s, our end credits play over another Oscar-bait power ballad, this one being loosely inspired by the Waltz of the Flowers. Not one of the best, but still a good one to close the film on. Enjoy!

I honestly feel a little bad critiquing The Nutcracker Prince because at the end of the day it’s a fantasy, and fantasies play by their own emotional nonsensical surrealistic rules. It’d be like if Cinema Sins tried to blast a Jean Cocteau flick (and knowing those bastards’ egos they will if they haven’t already). Sure the characters aren’t the most deep, there’s some fluff in the story that could have been put to better use and the animation is inconsistent (characters go wildly off-model and if you pause at the right moment you’ve got plenty of fodder for the “DIDNEY WORL” meme) but when they get it right it’s wonderful. I’d say this and the obscure stop-motion version done by Sanrio (yes, the Hello Kitty factory) make for the most faithful and interesting retellings of The Nutcracker out there. I credit The Nutcracker Prince along with the Nutcracker Suite segment of Fantasia for introducing me to this magical music and story in the first place. I watched the tape quite a bit up until it got lost in the home entertainment shuffle, and enjoyed seeing it several times on the Disney Channel and Toon Disney during the holidays (and the occasional Christmas in July marathon). It’s not perfect, but hey, it wouldn’t be the holidays if you didn’t enjoy at least one imperfectly animated special that hits you over the head with nostalgia feels. Some people have Rankin-Bass, I have The Nutcracker Prince. And I hope the next generation will embrace it too.

Merry Christmas, and thank you for reading! Do you have a favorite version of The Nutcracker? Let me know in the comments! If you’d like to support me and see more reviews, consider supporting me on Patreon.

I’ll see you in the new year with Abby Kane’s requested review of Disney’s Pinocchio – that is, if my special Christmas present doesn’t keep me from finishing it on time (you’re going down, Ridley!!)

Artwork by Charles Moss.

Christmas Shelf Reviews: The Nutcracker Prince (1990) Merry Christmas everyone! To conclude this month of merrymaking we're looking at an animated Christmas cult classic that I have a bit of a soft spot for.

[chanzicoup]

A/N: I got this template from tenseoyong and I could not find the original creator to give proper credit to and I’ll link the Hyuk ver. of this request when it’s up and posted! Sorry to keep you waiting! I’m so happy some of you guys like my Daddy A-Zs and are showing VIXX some love~

{Hyuk’s Version}

A = Announcement.- How do you tell him and the world that you’re expecting?

The two of you would drop hints via social media updates, not really releasing the pregnancy.

B = Books.- Did he read the books?

No he doesn't think he needs to because of his older siblings that have children.

C = Cuddles.- Who cuddles the baby more?

He likes to cuddle so he'd cuddle you and the baby as often as possible.

D = Daddy.- (His reaction to being called Daddy and it setting in.)

He'd laugh about it at first bc he's not used to being called that and it's embarrassing at first but then he's hella prideful bc he made a cute ass baby.

E = Empty.- Who goes to the store when you guys run out of supplies?

There is no running out in your household, just running low. You would send him a list of things you need and he'd give the list to a manager or an intern. But he'd feel bad for using their services for personal reason so he'd treat them to dinner or something every once in a while to say thank you.

F = Feeding time- Who does feeding time?

He loves feeding time and he makes a game out of it when the baby starts to become a picky eater. He's that dad that'll pretend the food is an airplane that needs to land in the airport aka the baby's mouth. Ken would even make the food look like animals or shape it into hearts or smth.

G = Grumpy baby. - Who is better at dealing with a grumpy baby?

Ken goofs around too much so normally it would distract the baby and get them engaged in another activity but when the baby is cranky and needs a nap he's not good at calming down, only hyping up. That's when you come in and hush the baby to sleep while sitting on the couch and next thing you know Ken is asleep on your shoulders and you have your two babies cuddling with you for warmth.

H = How?- how many kids does he want?

He's grown up in a house full of boys (his older brothers) and he's lived in the VIXX dorm so I could say he's tired of a bunch of boys and want to have like two or three daughters. But if he's granted a son he's be just as happy.

J = Jokes.- best dad joke?

Q: Where does a Korean grandfather look for love?

A: e-할머니!

K = Kisses.- His favorite place to kiss the baby.

Dad!Ken has a bit of beard stubble coming through and he noticed that it tickled the baby when he picked them up. Now whenever his beard starts back up again Ken is practically rubbing his face against the baby's, kissing every so often.

L = Little.- How he feels when he holds the baby for the first time.

He's an emotional wreck and he's still mentally recovering from the labor process along with you, who is physically recovering. This is definitely the calmest you have ever and will ever see Ken be. He gently strokes the baby's cheeks with he thumb while they hold his pinky with their entire hand.

M = Mommy.- what does he call you?

You two have an inside joke and it's basically making fun of how you two are all grown up with a baby, bills, jobs, etc. and you're "grandma" while he's "grandpa"

N = Nappies.- who deals with the really bad diapers?

Ken is really good at this bc he makes it entertaining for the baby, who real;y hates having their diaper changed

O = Onesies- Who likes to dress the baby in ridiculous outfits?

Oh puh-lease ken is in for it 100%. He even gets one for you and him so you two can match the baby. When you refuse to wear the outrageous costume he and the baby pout cutly before you submit to it regretfully.

P = Pet names- names he calls the baby.

"munchkin"

Q = Questions.- How many questions does he ask the nurse?

None really. He's hella cocky (but in the nicest way possible) and thinks that what he knows is all he needs to know to raise a child and let's just say he doesn't know nearly everything he needs to so when there is something that trips him up he's calling his brother for advice.

R = Rely- what is the biggest thing you rely on each other for?

You would rely on him to grow up along with the baby. I am not insulting Ken at all it's just that I can see him getting carried away with the joking around and making things turn south. He's going to rely on you to have patience with him, and recognize he's trying to improve.

S = Sleep duty. - who gets up when it’s really late at night?

Neither of you want to get up but it's ultimately you who does bc Ken would pull out a book to lull them back to sleep with and end up singing the whole thing and waking the baby up even more.

T = Trepidation.- fears as a new parent.

He's afraid that when he's trying to cheer the child up when they are upset he'll only make the situation worse. It's an issue he wants to solve asap.

U = Ultra sounds.- His reactions to the ultrasounds.

Ken couldn't see the baby at first, as most new parents also have trouble seeing for the first time. He didn't want the nurse to know so he went along with it, pretending to know what the nurse was talking about. When he and you were given time to yourselves he admitted he couldn't see it and you'd have to point it out to him. It's a story you two will laugh at in the future.

V = Values.- what is the most important value he wants to teach your child.

He wants to make sure his child knows that the largest priority in life is one's own happiness, and that work/school should not come before it.

W = Water.- Who gives the babe the baths?

He would too and have a field day with the bubbles in the body wash and there's an abundance of squeeky ducks that he may or may not have collected since he was a boy and wanted to use them again one day with his own baby.

X = X-mas- what do you guys plan for the holidays?

For the first few years Ken, You, and the baby spend time with family you'd never see on a regular basic but after a while it'll be time for the baby to stay with VIXX uncles while momma and papa go out to a romantic date night for the holidays. Of course you and him will be back to celebrate with your child, but Ken doesn't want you to forget how much you mean to him.

Y = Yelling.- How many fights do the two of you get in?

Most of the time when you two fight it'll be because of something stupid adding onto something else that's just as stupid and you two are just annoyed with the situation and take it out on each other but you two always apologize immediately after and solve the problem like mature adults.

Z = Zoo- How crazy is the house after the birth?

It's an organized mess that you two don't bother with anymore bc the baby is only going to make a mess again after their nap.

~Blake

[not-close-to-straight]

*Christmas* (Chapter 23)

CHRISTMAS LIST HERE!

Enjoy!

***********************

{{SONG}}

Any other time of year, it would have been disconcerting to see Deadpool--in full Mercenary regalia complete with a mask and with the added bonus of a Santa beard--crooning a surprisingly good karaoke rendition of Last Christmas to his blushing, grinning boyfriend. 

And Peter was blushing, a bright red that almost overshadowed the obnoxious suit he was wearing, {{SUIT}}, but he couldnt stop smiling either, still buzzing from an incredible first night and day in their new home together, too happy and too in love to care that the rest of the Avengers were cat calling good naturedly at Wade, Hawkeye flinging one dollar bills at him, and a surprisingly tipsy Maria Hill hollering for him to take it off!

Wade had wanted the obnoxious suit, of course, but his self consciousness had crept in at the last minute and he had opted to hide beneath his costume, but gamely added a Santa beard to make it festive. 

Peter had kissed his boyfriend on the lips, told him that it was perfectly fine to wear his suit, and bought the suit in a smaller size. 

And now Wade was belting along to George Michael and making a spectacular scene--- 

---And Peter just cheered his love on. 

***********************

Natasha had poured herself into a sparkly green dress with silver pumps, a Santa hat pinned on top of her hair, and every time she crossed her legs, the already short skirt rode up and showed the holster on her thigh. 

Pepper was in a nearly matching dress in a sultry shade of red, a black pair of heels putting her a few inches over six feet tall, and showing off miles and miles of perfect legs, and the tiny bells on her earrings tinkled every time she laughed. 

Val had even come tonight, looking less Christmas-y but still amazing in leather pants and an off the shoulder sweater, her hair loose around her shoulders and a smile on her face as she stood and talked with the women. Sam had talked her into tucking a sprig of mistletoe behind her ear, and Bruce had shoved a poinsettia at her as they came through the door, so she looked at least a little festive, even if she kept rolling her eyes every time Pepper’s earrings jingled. 

Clint, Sam, and Rhodey, all looking equal parts dashingly handsome and also entirely ridiculous in their Christmas suits {{SUITS}}, watched their girls chat and laugh and drank their beer.

“Gotta tell ya.” Sam took a long drink, his eyes lighting when Val looked his way and waved. “I dont know what I did in a past life to get me a girl like Val in this one, but damn. Damn I did good.” 

“I hear that.” Rhodey raised his glass in a salute. “Pepper is the best thing that ever happened to me.” 

“How long did it take her to say yes to a date, again?” Sam needled. “Six years?” 

“Five.” Rhodey sent him a look. “And in my defense--”

“Isnt she beautiful?” Clint sighed dreamily and the other men turned to look at him, grinning at each other over how he was just staring at Nat. “Look how good she looks in that dress. In those shoes. Look at the ring on her finger. Ive waited seven years to give her a real ring and damn if it doesnt look amazing on her. Seven years to give that woman a diamond she deserves and I still don’t know if its enough for her.” 

“She’s stayed with you this long.” Rhodey elbowed him teasingly. “The diamond should make sure she stays another seven or so, huh?” 

“Leave him alone.” Sam signaled the bartender for another drink. “He’s spending Christmas with the terrifying woman he loves--”

“--you’re one to talk--”

“--SO WE SHOULD LET HIM BE ALL SAPPY IF HE WANTS!” Sam finished loudly. “And you know what, Colonel. At least my woman--”

“OH! We are not going to get into a conversation like that!” Bruce interrupted their chat, pushing through to get to the bar. “Do not start comparing women. All three of them are beautiful and incredibly smart and terrifying in their own way.” 

“Ill drink to that.” Rhodey nodded. 

“Here here.” 

***************************

“Im not really sure the cape goes with your suit, babe.” Steve teased, running his hands up Thors arms, squeezing at his biceps appreciatively. “But maybe later you ditch the suit and just keep the cape?” 

“Steven, my love.” Thor cocked an eyebrow at him. “I have always worn a cape, and I will continue to do so. Even with this--” he glanced down at the suit Steve had ordered for him in distaste. “-- Even in this version of Earth clothing.” 

“Dont worry.” Steve leaned up and kissed him. “You look great in it. And did you see Tony’s face when we walked in?”

“Yes, he--” 

“Oh look.” Bucky joined them, casting a critical eye over their matching suits {{SUITS}} “Its Tweedle Dee and Tweedle- Dumb-Ass. Nice suits.” 

“Tony made you watch Alice in Wonderland?” Steve asked instead of commenting on Buckys own {{SUIT}}, an atrocious thing that he had found just earlier today in a thrift store. 

“God yeah, what is wrong with that movie?” Bucky asked, exasperated. “Tony loves it!!” 

“Yeah. Made me watch it like eight times with him.” Steve groaned. “But you know, literally anything is better than watching the Grinch of repeat so you know--” 

“Where is Anthony?” Thor looked around the crowded room, over the heads of the team and the agents from SHIELD Tony had invited, and the other various vigilante types like Matt Murdock and the sharp tongued Jessica Jones. 

“Yeah, why’s Tony late to his own party? That doesnt sound like--”

Before Steve could even finish the sentence, the soft music cut out, and a new song started playing just as the balcony doors flew open and the Iron Man suit came flying through, music blasting from its outer speakers {{SONG}} as it barrel rolled and shot off glitter bombs as it circled the huge room. 

The suit landed with a boom-- and Tony jumped out with his arms held high, a huge grin on his face, the worst Christmas {SUIT} anyone had ever seen tailored perfectly to his body.

“Christmas Party!!!” he yelled and everyone yelled right back at him, lifting their drinks in a cheers as the music started blasting again, and Tony started moving through the room, shaking hands, and sharing hugs and exclaiming over everyones suit. 

“You guys all wore suits!” he cried, dragging Bucky down for a kiss and snatching a bottle out of the air as Clint tossed him one. “Best party ever!” 

“Where did you get this?” Bucky tugged at the hideous thing. “I mean you look great, sugar but... damn.” 

“I had it specially made.” Tony waggled his eyebrows. “I got a guy for this.” 

“Of course you do.” 

“Merry Christmas Tony!” Nat and Pepper nearly attacked him with kisses to his cheeks, and Sam snapped a picture just as Tony was laughing over it. 

“Merry Christmas guys. Lets get holly jolly drunk, huh?” 

***********************

***********************

It was four am when the party finally cleared out, the last guest put up in a spare room, the alcohol put away. 

Most of the guys had ditched their suit jackets and were lounging in just the brightly colored pants and dress shirts, snacking on whatever was left over, laughing over the evenings events. 

Nat was sprawled across Clints lap, letting him work his fingers through her hair, pulling bobby pins out and massaging at her scalp. 

Pepper and Rhodey were cuddled up on the recliner, Peppers shoes somewhere over by the karaoke stage, Rhodey’s jacket draped around her shoulders to keep her warm. 

Steve was full on straddling Thor, teasing him about how good he looked in the suit, and then lowering his voice and teasing things that no one wanted to have to overhear.

Tony came back downstairs from making sure Wade and Peter had found their room -- and been thoroughly warned on pain of being thrown out a window to not destroy it-- and Bucky reached for him instantly, tugging him onto his lap and kissing him soundly. 

Sam and Val sat holding hands, talking quietly with Bruce, who was having a cup of tea to try and get a jump on what would be a hell of a hangover later on. 

“How you feeling, baby?” Bucky whispered. “You doing alright? Happy with the party?” 

Tony looked around the room with a little smile on his face. “The party was perfect. Got a Tower full of friends and family who had a blast tonight. And now now its 4am on Christmas Eve, and Ive got my arms around my fells--” Bucky grinned at that. “-- So I am just about as happy as Ive ever been.” 

Tony leaned in and kissed him again. “Just as happy as Ive ever been.” 

************************