#i love him i hate him i need him he should have died i detest him i would go mad if something happened to him i would LAUGH SO HARD if he d

[astrozure]

ah....my deer-est guy ever

[fandomworld9728]

Hi, I would like to add another idea to the previous ask I like to think that Vox and Alastor met when they were alive and human, though Vox was still a kid. Still, Lucifer took the privilege to babysit him! Vox may or may not have a kiddy crush on sweet ol' Luci

(Ooo~ that sounds so cute! And makes for an interesting timeline

Vox being in his 30s - 40s and dying in the 50s & Alastor being in his 30s - 40s and dying in the 30s)

(Here's the timeline for this AU: Alastor was born in 1900 and died in 1933 at the age of 33. When he meets Vox, he is 30 years old.

Vox was born in 1922 and died in 1958 at the age of 36. When he meets Alastor and Lucifer, he is 8 years old)

(...I had planned this to be more cute... however, it had a mind of its own and this is what my brain spat out. Plus, I'm not very good at writing kiddy crushes so I apologize)

Lucifer:

How long had he been on Earth now? He should have gone back to Hell after he got one of Paimon's sons' books back from those cultists. Lucifer was going to have a serious talk about this with him and his many children about this.

However, it wasn't all bad. He had met a very interesting human. They had been dying in a dirty alleyway and Lucifer wasn't sure why, but he had this strange compulsion to heal them.

After the human had woken up, Lucifer learned that his name was Alastor and that he was a famous radio host. Of course, he couldn't hide his true self from Alastor since he had the man ingest his blood to keep him from dying. Before he knew it, the two had made a deal and began to live together.

It's the happiest Lucifer's felt in a long time. As much as he needed to get back to Hell, he didn't want to leave all this behind. And luckily for him, Alastor made it part of their deal that Lucifer couldn't leave until Alastor himself had died.

Honestly, it almost sounded like a marriage contract rather than a demonic deal. Not that he minded. They almost acted like a married couple as it was. There was only one small snag in their happy (not) married life.

Alastor had come home with a child. That in itself wasn't an issue. The problem came with how upset his human was about the current situation he had been forced into and the details of how it happened.

Alastor's boss had a client visiting who brought his son along. The business deals were to be negotiated during seedy activities that children should not be around, and as a show of good faith Alastor had been offered up as a babysitter.

As much as his human detested his boss and having no control, he loved his job. So, with no choice in the matter if he wanted to stay hosting the radio show, he brought the kid to their apartment.

The other problem... they couldn't get caught acting like a couple. Lucifer was a naturally affectionate and clingy person. He had been ecstatic when he was given permission to freely touch and cling to his human. He wasn't sure how he was going to handle not being able to do so for a good part of the day.

Then there was the fac that they had recently started to be more... intimate... with each other. How would Lucifer survive without his daily dose of love?! Okay. Maybe he was being a little dramatic. And the kid wasn't that bad to watch.

After Alastor had made it clear he wanted nothing to do with the kid (Vic? Vox?) he had pretty much attached himself to Lucifer. Which thrilled him if he was being honest. He loved children. Plus, seeing how jealous his sinful human always got over the attention usually given to him being showered on someone else was oddly enjoyable.

Especially when Alastor took out that jealous and frustration on Lucifer in the bedroom. That, however, got them caught. As much as he hated doing it, he used his magic to repress the child's memory.

He just hoped this wouldn't come back to bite them in the ass one day.

Alastor:

Things had been going so well lately. Alastor didn't have to worry about getting caught for his crimes thanks to his deal with Lucifer and his show was growing in popularity. Soon enough he'd be able to improve their living arrangements.

While he the small devil would use his powers to do it for them if he only asked, there was something satisfying about showing him that he was able to provide. Alastor would be lying if he said he hadn't become fond of the demon and taking care of him had brought about some sort of purpose to his life.

There was just something oddly charming about Lucifer. So, with his dream job secured, a lovely roommate, and the devil's power at his disposal, Alastor's life was almost perfect.

Of course, once things started to go well for him, life decided to screw him over in some way. Case in point, his boss was forcing him to be the babysitter of an investor's child. While Alastor would never kill a child, he was not a fan of the little creatures as a general rule.

There are always exceptions to his rules, however. Like how Lucifer was the only one allowed in their his bed. Or how him and Mimzy were the only ones besides his mother who could freely touch him. And this little brat was about to cause him to break his rule regarding murder.

The way he got to freely hang off the King of Hell while Alastor was barely allowed in his space during Victor's stay with them. Because of Lucifer's lack of self-control when it came to affection, especially Alastor's, he thought it best to minimize their contact at the moment.

It would be easier to handle if that pint sized brat wasn't so smug about it. Well, there were things that Alastor could do that Victor could not. If they weren't so scared of the backlash, Alastor would show him just who Lucifer belonged to.

This was a risky move since the weasel had begged to sleep over in their spare room that Lucifer has been using during this weeklong torture session. But Alastor's patience was wearing thin. He needed to prove that he still possessed the fallen angel.

So, he did just that. High off a successful hunt and good day at work (as well as the booze Mimzy had talked him into), Alastor motioned for the beautiful devil to follow him from where he lay cuddled up to that brat. Leading him into the privacy of the bedroom they spent many nights together, he put Lucifer back where he belonged. Under Alastor in their bed.

This was crazy. But fuck, if Lucifer didn't make him crazier then he already was. Alastor had never wanted to possess someone before. Never wanted to hold, kiss, or lay with someone before. Why was this man his exception?

He was beautiful and held so much power. Was God's favorite. The first temptation and the one to give mankind free will. Was the ruler of Hell. Yet, here he was, submitting to a human sinner. Submitting only to Alastor. It filled his body with a rush of pride, power, and... dare he say warmth?

"Alastor. What are you doing? W-We shouldn't..."

"You want to do this just as much as I do. I feel like I'll lose it if I have to wait because that child somehow weaseled his way into staying the night."

"O-Okay. Just a quick round. We shouldn't be risking it like this but... I know how you feel."

With Lucifer's consent, Alastor dove right in, desperate for his favorite treat. That delicious golden blood. Biting and tearing the smooth flesh was the fastest way to get him in the mood. Alastor loved the feast and feeling of a lover who allowed him to indulge in his cannibalistic tendencies.

For some reason, Lucifer enjoyed the feeling of being bitten and having his blood drank. Something to do with brain chemicals? He wasn't going to try to understand the demon's ramblings.

A gasp pulled their attention away from their love making (they hadn't even gotten that far!) and over to the door. There stood a shocked and very angry Victor.

Oh. Alastor may not get to indulge in sex tonight, however, he did get to have the satisfaction of knowing this brat could now see that Lucifer belonged to him.

Dear beautiful Lucifer who was flushed that lovely golden color to match the blood covering him from all the bites Alastor left on his body. His lips were swollen from how hard Alastor had kissed him, leaving him a panting mess.

His fallen angel desperately tried to cover himself for whatever reason. All the important parts were out of sight from where Alastor was still seated between his legs. Unfortunately, whatever lesson he had been hoping Victor had learned was taken away by Lucifer repressing the memory.

Oh well. He still felt vindicated, and that little brat was going home that afternoon. Alastor let him have those last few hours, knowing the child will never touch what was his again.

Vox:

At the age of eight, Victor was sure he had fallen in love. His father had taken him with on a business trip and left him in the care of a radio host who worked for one of his father's friends. The man, Alastor, was so cool and charming. Someone that Victor wanted to be like. Not to mention he was very handsome.

Yet despite this, he heard the women they passed whispering about how it was a shame he was single. How could someone like Alastor be a bachelor? It didn't make any sense. That is until they stepped foot in the man's apartment. Alastor had an actual angel waiting at home for him.

Now, Victor wasn't stupid. He was fairly intelligent for his age. He knew that there were people who hid their homosexual relationships out of fear. Hell, his father had a secret male lover that his mother pretended not to know about.

So just watching the two interact briefly was enough to have him theorizing. And if he were Alastor, he would pretend to be a bachelor too. With a beauty like that waiting at home? Alastor was a lucky man.

When that soft and sunny smile was directed at Victor, he felt like his heart had stopped. He had decided he would make this angel his. Sure, he would have to come back for him when he was an adult, but it was never too early to charm him and worm his way into his heart.

That's how he spent his week. Every afternoon he would be dropped at Alastor's and since the man wanted nothing to do with him, he would spend all his time with Lucifer. He would let Victor hang off him and would let him help with whatever he would do. What made it all the better was it seemed Victor was driving a wedge between the secret love birds. Good. This would make his plan easier to complete.

He was getting closer and closer to success! Lucifer had even given him a nickname! Vox. And he refused to believe that lowly radio host's lies about his angel forgetting his name. Alastor was just jealous over how close and affectionate they were.

His last chance was here, and he had to seal the deal. Persuading (begging) his way to sleeping over on his last night there, Victor planned on asking Lucifer to leave Alastor and wait for him. He was confident the romantic gesture would surely woo him.

However, every time he tried to ask, something would get in his way! Before he knew it, it was time to go to bed. Luckily, he was able to convince Lucifer to share a bed with him. Laying cuddled up to the warm and kind angel, sleep came easily.

However, when he awoke in the middle of the night, his angel was gone. Where could he have gone? He was close to falling back asleep, thinking Lucifer may have just gotten up for some water or something, when a loud noise had him springing out of bed.

That had been Lucifer's voice! Was he okay? Had that pompous ass Alastor hurting him? If so, Victor was going to- to...

He wasn't sure what happened. One moment, he was standing in the doorway to Alastor's bedroom and the next he was waking up in bed. He felt like something was missing. But he couldn't put his finger on it.

Did something happen? Trying to remember what happened last night, Victor went to the kitchen and hugging his angel around the legs before turning to sleepily glare at the radio host.

The man looked smugger than usual. Victor was sure that stupid cheshire grin of his would haunt his for the rest of his life. One of these days, he was going to wipe it off his face.

[kerubimcrepin]

Wakfu OVA - Book 2, Ush [PART 6]

This goes very hard as a beginning for the first, liveblog I'm writing back home after my trip. (It's still running on scheduled posts because I realized I really like scheduling posts)

also: asset reusage for them falling spotted.

I need them to be in this amount of pain always.

FDGSDFGSDZFGJFDLJGVDFLKJGVSHFVDSFHGSJGUSFHVJDFGNSJKRHGDSRHBGFFGJHFGNFGHFGJTDJXGJ

Thank you OVA for this meal.

He's so fucking stupid and pathetic and I'm here giggling and kicking my feet because i love him so much because of these qualities.

Go girl give us nothing...

As was proven by season 4 of Wakfu, and the Remington comic: while Ush and Joris do hate each other, they can agree on helping people. Which is why Joris is hoping that maybe Ush will switch sides.

On a more important note than pointing out random character interactions: FANGS.

Joris in Remington comics: Ush how about you kill yourself for the good of Bonta. not like you don't have lives to spare. Ush here: You want me to be your third pet so badly that it makes you look stupid.

I need to know everything about their weird fucking rivalry. Like Ush tries to go for a multitude of low blows here.

Here's my translation of this interaction from Ush-speak: The person who takes care of Ush when he dies gets paid for it, while Cringoris has been doing this shit for free for two men who are far more stupid and entitled. AND somehow it makes Cringeoris feel entitled to Ush's cooperation or respect. While he's literally some guy he isn't even related to. (He's hardly related to Kerubim and Atcham even! Why the hell should they affect his relationship with the weird blue guy?? They're far younger than him, have a different family, maybe a different mother and different upbringing... The two of them, and all the other Ecaflip Demigods, are only related to him because of Some Pink Guy whom Ush hates and wants to get rid of. They are brothers only on a biological level. And yet to Joris, who is literally adopted, this means Something. Is he insane? Is he stupid?)

The CEO of liking people who try to kill him has spoken on his controversial yet predictable opinion on the whole "there are 13847234 "siblings" in our "family tree" because our "father" cannot stop having sex with mortal women. And we keep killing each other, not without our father's goading. What does this mean for our relationships" thing.

Yes, it's from a game that was decanonized, but:

Never forget what Ecaflip did to his demigod Yakusha and that demigod's mother.

Or everything he did to Kerubim and Atcham.

I think that Ush may have, like, very normal and understandable reasons to detest Ecaflip — and not being into the idea of getting buddy-buddy with Kerubim and Atcham just because of their shared relation to the god (whom he hates) is actually pretty rational.

A semi-canonical source (devlog for the de-canonised game Wakfu Raiders) points out that while Yakusha and Ush may not share a mother — unlike Atcham and Kerubim — they are united in being abandoned by their father.

While Kerubim and Atcham also suffered, except from, uh... too much presence of Ecaflip in their lives, I can't help but think that from Ush's point of view, they're the lucky ones.

He loves to bully his privileged loser little brothers who actually had a (horrible fuckawful) father figure while growing up.

(That, and his belief that Kerubim is stupid,,, isn't entirely unfounded.)

[10holmes]

The LiuJiu brainrot is soooo bad.

I've devoured about any and all angsty, heartbreaking but also wholesome fics there are for this pairing but I crave more!

I can't explain it.

There's just something about reading about Shen Jiu's silent struggles as a disciple (and later as a peak lord), while (not) dealing with his own trauma and PTSD, and even though he's done nothing much to warrant it (not anything more or less than other people and given the moral/rule set-up of the story world), being constantly misunderstood and bullied and badmouthed by his peers that should be family and have his back or be more willing to get to know him and the truth of him before spreading falsehoods...

And in the meantime SJ/SQQ is still giving his all to the sect and maybe even trying to be better and appear less hostile or just deep down wants and wishes for someone to truly see and understand him...

And then we have LQQ who realizes somehow, either on a mission or in the Linxi Cave or through some other situation where SQQ steps in to help and save him or something other about his past or true character is revealed, that SJ is not the scum LQG was led to believe he was, and that LQQ got it all wrong, leading them to slowly reconcile as LQG owns up to his bad past bevaviour towards SJ and becomes compeltely whipped for him.

Well, this is the happy version of alternative fics I crave.

But I actually like it even more if everything remains unresolved: SQQ continues to suffer, especially by the hands of LQG although he wishes them to make up, and eventually dies, and LQQ only later learns the truth (some of it at least)...

Or my new brainrot of agony is, imagining SJ's soul never quite left after the transmigration happens, so he pays witness to how everyone grows to like SY as SQQ, and he can't help but feel pained, more so when even YQY and LQQ don't notice anything amiss...

How heartbreaking is that?! Watching an imposter get everything you always silently wanted or longed for (but also doing something that makes you hate and detest them for defiling his body in such a way -> getting together with LBG)

I just love thinking about SJ's thoughts watching the events of SVSSS unfurl. It sure would be one anxious angsty painful soliloquy...

But also imagine LQG notices something is amiss and knows that this is no longer SJ and he despairs, longing for his shixiong and wishing him back and even tries to somehow find his soul and bring it back, while SJ is hovering around him as a ghost, trying to reach out but unable to...

So much angst and heartbreak potential! I might actually write something with that premise.

But it would also just be nice to read it. I need more angsty painful LiuJiu fics. Call me deranged and sick, but I crave these fics like fine chocolate.

[anyalovesu]

tolerate it.

i. i sit watch you.

— “some days, i really do wish that i did something. i wish i messed something up and ruined their life forever because maybe then, i would understand why i was being treated like shit.”

Being trapped in an ordeal of a marriage is already as stupid as it sounds. It’s not like Eli had the choice to say no and walk away because news flash, that’s never been in any of the options if there were even options at all. It’s always been sucking it up and making something tolerable out of the circumstances that were given to her. But being stuck in a nightmare of a marriage with someone she used to have memorized inside and out is a whole ‘nother realm of hell. 

It has always been the two of them. Where Eli was, there was Leon. There was a point in time where one could never be seen without the other. They were each other’s first best friends after all. In fact, they shared a lot of firsts together. It was safe to say that Eli knew Leon better than anyone and the same went for the other. The two of them weathered many storms together, always confident that the storms would eventually pass and they’d be okay because they had each other. But the storm that eventually unrooted the foundations of such friendship came in the form of love. During freshman year, Leon began dating this girl that absolutely detested Eli’s existence. It was strike one, Eli had no idea where the hatred came from and even if she asked so she could fix it, the most that she received was a snigger and an eye roll. It was atrocious, but in an attempt to fix it, Eli confronted Leon about it to ask if there’s anything she could do to make his girlfriend comfortable with her. With his response, Eli just knew that he was no longer the person she would hold on to whenever it stormed. Leon was no longer the best friend she had since she was a kid when he explained that there was no going around it and they should part ways. After all they weren’t kids anymore who needed each other to get through life.

It confused her. How can someone change so quickly? In only a glimpse, the most reliable person she knew of was no longer the same person. Leon was no longer Leon and she hated it — how easy could she be set aside for someone new?

So then, she decided if Leon was going to replace her, she was going to replace him too. 

And she did.

There was Isaac. 

Isa was everything and more that Leon couldn’t be. For the remaining years of college, Isa was Eli’s safe haven. A self-made sanctuary that she always felt at ease whenever he was around. And somehow, the pain of losing Leon in such a whiplash was no longer felt for more than she should because Isa was there. He had no problem showing his flaws and showed himself with utter genuineness. Isa is kind. He was ten-fold more patient than she is, which probably made him the most patient person that she has ever met in her entire life. Jesus. Isa never even raised his voice at her even when things got rough. It never stormed with Isa. Or maybe it did. But she was too safe to notice it.

After graduating, another storm came around. This time it came in the form of a deal. A deal that had nothing for Eli in it, nor did it have anything for the other end of the deal. There was no better day to realize that Eli, one out of three possible heirs to Yang Enterprises, was nothing more than a pawn in their parents’ businesses. That was strike two.

It was first hidden in a disguise, claiming that it’ll secure a good spot in the company. Re: Inheriting the entire company if Elizalde Yang dies. None of the three Yang children got caught on the bait. So they disguised it again. This time, it was in the form of cornering and Eli being the only daughter made her an easy target. If she says no, she’d be as good as dead to the family for refusing to be an instrument to the expansion of the company. There was more coercion that happened, but God forbid did Eli want to go through all of them one by one and relive everything again. But to sum it up, she’d be disowned if she said no.

It only got worse from there when the entire family was gathered at the dinner table with the Parks—where two former twin flames refused to look at each other, avoiding even the quickest of glances. 

Why did it have to be Leon? Eli wanted to fall to her knees and collect what remained of her heart that just dropped when the rest of the deal was discussed over dinner. Why Leon? Of all the people, why did it have to be him?

They already had everything set from the very beginning. The contract had been signed a long time ago without their knowledge and the first disguise was only to make Eli think that she had a chance and missed it. It had always been written in the contract that it was her that had to  marry one of the Park sons.

And it wasn’t even the very worst of it. Both families have already bribed and threatened their respective partners to stay away and not interfere with what is yet to come. Eli could only sit there in disbelief in front of her plate of untouched steak as she listened helplessly to how they coerced her boyfriend and Leon’s girlfriend to back away from their plan. How could Isaac agree to this? 

And that was strike three— being exchanged for money and threats like she never mattered at all. Like she was never worth fighting for. 

Leon being the way he is, couldn’t even look at anyone that night. He wanted to fight. Save what is remaining of his and his girlfriend’s relationship, but it was hopeless. He will be going against one of the most powerful men in the country. He’s never going to win that.

He is just as helpless as the next person is.

They are both helpless, powerless little pawns in their parents’ game.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ characters ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ previous ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ next ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

[wickedjr89gaming]

Erin already had access to the Grim Reaper's phone! Perfect.

Do you remember Rosemarie Taylor? https://wickedjr89gaming.tumblr.com/post/691742295677091840/olive-may-be-becoming-a-slightly-better-person

If you don't want to go to the old post: It's her killing Rosemarie Taylor in order to talk to the Grim Reaper and I had apparently said this

"Olive may be becoming a slightly better person, actually having feelings, but she needs to talk to the Grim Reaper ok?

They chat. She tells him she’s fallen for Pascal, actually fallen for him unlike her previous husbands that she just used to see Grim again. He tells her that’s for the best. Their relationship isn’t exactly healthy and while Grim doesn’t care about murder one way or the other, most people take issue with it.

She worries what will become of her in the afterlife, she’s afraid and she can’t put it off forever, not exactly. She refuses to become a vampire because Grim detests vampires, says they aren’t natural. 

He tells her they’ll meet again when she goes and he’ll help her along. She does hope someone resurrects her as a zombie. She hadn’t thought of that before but now it seems a perfect answer, she can escape death forever if that happens! Or well, probably can anyway, and since Grim makes zombies he doesn’t mind them. At least they died at one point, officially. It doesn’t matter to him if they stay in the afterlife, his job is just get them their once. 

But she’ll have to convince someone to do that for her when she dies. Meaning she needs to have genuine friends, and gasp, she’s got feelings for Pascal and since she loves Nervous, now Blair, she cares at least somewhat about the people they care about. 

What are these feelings? They feel weird to her, caring about other humans, when all she’s cared about before was Grim and getting what she wanted.

She’s still Olive, but a better Olive. Grim encourages her to be with Pascal and human friends. They’ll meet again one day but their relationship was always doomed. They are both grateful for what they had. They regret nothing.

Some habits die hard though and an improved Olive, is still Olive. "

.....

Well anyway, you can see where Olive's head is. She doesn't think being a zombie is a horrible fate. So...she resurrects Rosemarie as a zombie, truly, out of the goodness of her heart.

Rosemarie though probably doesn't see it that way.

That last pic of Olive I just imagine her thinking "Omg she stinks. I didn't realize zombies stink so bad." lol even though yes I know that that's not what is happening.

What is Rosemarie's story? Well, zombies are pretty well hated in the sims universe. The Curious brothers are different, they don't really mind since she isn't eating their brains, but most sims, detest zombies. Not all but many.

Rosemarie can't go back to her family as a zombie.

Olive thinks Rosemarie should be so happy to be back, and this time hopefully forever! Rosemarie feels trapped and confused as to why anyone would want to be a zombie, but this is her life now, and at least everyone in this household is nice to her...

[sumecienta]

Fic Ideas (Or WIPS I will probably never get back to): BNHA Version

I've got so many ideas and I honestly have them as WIPs in my Google Docs but I-

How can I continue working on them if I can't stop thinking about t h e m.

Villain/Vigilante BAMF!Inko (because I had a period in my life where motherhood was romanticized so heavily that I project my lack of ass-kicking capabilities onto her) -> Aizawa is her crime fighting nemesis -> Retires when she's preg with Mido -> Enters Mido in self-defense courses = confident and confrontational child -> UA!Arc for Mido -> Skip to Baku Rescue & Villain!Inko is at. the. scene! WOOP WOOP! -> UA Dorms, Aizawa & A/M meet her, Aizawa figures her out and they both wait for Mido & AM to have a "secret" talk outside and cOnFrOnTaTiOn WoOoO -> SHE DIES AT THE END (I have it written down... I just like my closure in my fics, and this one is wonderfully, depressing)

Soulmates AU! Where they are bound to hate, detest, absolutely loathe each other -> It's not a well-known fact but like everyone has just that person they cannot stand

Amnesiac!Inko -> Inko-centric, no one realizes something's wrong, especially since Midoriya is at UA and dealing with villainy (Post-UA Dorms), Meets villains & proceeds to dismantle the LOV through the power of god and anime on her side (+ and a little of friendships w/ a Custody Battle bc I stan Lawyer!Inko) [Crack-Fic]

(Is this fruity? Is admiring Midoriya Inko in a position of power fruity? [does it help that I admire Mirko? Am I gonna have a crisis about this? Of course not])

Uni Professor(Quirk Research)!Midoriya -> LOV is in a downlow, Shigaraki joins his class as Tenko -> months/years pass and blackmail's him to join LOV -> Oh no, look at that he doesn't want to kill heroes- BAM, have a nonconsensual quirk transfer that makes you ferally berserk (Naruto as pre-kurama w/ chakra poison cloak, feral fucker) -> Kills heroes, debuts as Jester (royal, entertainer to the big boys) -> LOV & Precepts alliance -> ERI- oh no, Mirio died- oh damn, Eri has OFA- huh

Eri!Timetravel Fic, Mido rescues her from Mid-OFA v AFO battle after AFO tries to go after her (I do not question the quirk capabilities nor limitations but Eri somehow does not disintegrate herself and ends up near Toddler!Mido (Infant Baku v Mido at the park scene) -> Lost and exchanges with Mama Mido to babysit Baby Mido for temporary housing until she can find an apartment, get a stable job & financial stability -> Tries to find Younger!Eri, does and oh look, Baby Eri is gonna delete her father- oop nope, Future!Eri stops it ("I recommend you get some help from Aizawa Shota, his quirk is erasure and under his supervision Eri could control her quirk") -> Somehow, she goes years without touching her Younger!Self so it ends with her patting her head kindly and just disappearing- INTO BABY ERI'S MEMORIES

This is bad, I did paragraphs but I need to get these on here so some poor wandering soul could adopt them and give them the life they deserve. Grow little ones, be one with society and flourish with your mistakes and ambitions. Take your potential and yell it out to the world, silent and echoing since all that should be loved by you is your own existence.

[drpg-global-archive]

DRPG - Character Episode - Etna

She's Laharl's vassal and is known for her caustic tongue. She is a great admirer of the late King Krichevskoy. She runs through Prinnies as if they were paper napkins.

Level 1/New Summon

Hey!? Wait a minute! Why have you summoned me!? I'm trying to enjoy a snack that I won fair and square! You've ruined the moment! I'm usually so stressed out. I only feel relaxed during snack time..... Give my desserts back to me.

Mere compensation isn't enough. Until I have my desserts to heal my body and mind, you will not be forgiven. Understand? Ha! What luck! I can have as many desserts as I want now.

Level 100

[Player]. I want something sweet. I want to have Jutunheim's special Omega Milk. Hmm? Why are you looking at me like that? Are you trying to tell me I eat too much?

Oh. Are you worried that I'll get fat? Humph! Stop being a worrywart! This slim and sexy body of mine can absorb all desserts! Bring it on! Also, you know that girls always crave desserts to feed their bodies and souls. What? Diabetes? Don't make me laugh!! That sort of thing only leads down a dead end!

Level 200

Even if I am the queen of desserts, there is still one that I detest. Red bean pretzels.... Listen, this really isn't a lead-in to some comedy skit where I tell you all about how "I hate red bean pretzels".

There used to be this individual I really admired. My admiration had nothing to do with romantic love. I just really respected this person. He was the father of Prince, Laharl. His name was King Krichevskoy. In my hour of need, he was the one who came to save me. If it wasn't for him, I would be dead right now.

It was a black pretzel that killed my beloved King Krichevskoy.....

Well, that's not entirely true... So, now, whenever I see a red bean pretzel, it reminds me of King Krichevskoy. As a result, pretzels always leave a bitter taste in my mouth. Do you believe me? How could I say this in front of [Player]!

Level 500

Ah! What the heck! His Royal Highness will never grow up! You listen to me, [Player]. After Your Royal Highness failed to win at this fighting game, he destroyed half the Overlord's castle out of rage. Do you know how many times this has happened? Every time he does this, I have to call the Prinnies to come help make repairs. He never considers how difficult this task is for me!

His Royal Highness is nothing more than a primary school student in a grown man's body! Really... If this continues, how am I ever going to fulfill King Krichevskoy's request? Before King Krichevskoy died, he entrusted His Royal Highness to me. His only wish was for His Royal Highness to grow up to become a qualified Overlord like him..... I want to help His Royal Highness become a powerful Overlord so that I can achieve my own dream of becoming King Krichevskoy's most trustworthy vassal.

His Royal Highness is still a long way away from being a true Overlord. I still can't call him "Your Majesty" ......Huh? You're asking me what I would do if His Royal Highness never becomes worthy enough to be King Krichevskoy's heir? Hmmm.Do you even need to ask? Kill him! And after he is dead, I will become the Overlord!

Level 1000

*Sigh* It's definitely a possibility, [Player].

Even if I do say so myself, Lv1000 is an incredible achievement! I can see potential in you. You'll be able to train whoever wants to become the greatest Overlord. To be honest, when I first saw you, I thought you'd give me a headache....Don't take it personally. I just didn't want to have to waste my time babysitting a human. But hey, you proved me wrong, [Player]. I saw you complete the mission without getting distracted.

Maybe you are a little bit like King Krichevskoy? Just a little bit. I can't explain it. There's this quality that transcends race and gender. Hmm... Maybe it is the sublimity of one's soul? Hahaha. What am I talking about? I don't usually talk like this, right? This is not who I usually am. I guess you are really good at messing me up. You should be proud of yourself.

So, keep it up. Please take care of me in the future, [Player].

[unfoundhoney]

a sister’s sacrifice ; part three ↠

↠ platonic!c!sleepy bois inc x fem!reader , platonic!c!tubbo x fem!reader ; angst just angst

↠ masterlist

↠ part one ; part two ; part three ;

↠ @leafyturtle @basheverythingyesterday @terribletoothbat @bestioe @junoblad3 @machiebach @ok-honey

when considering the deaths of the people on the dream smp server, yours is the hardest

schlatt was detested by all when he’d died

few people still truly cared for wilbur when he met his end; the man he once was was long gone by then

but you

you never changed

you were a constant for so many & immovably kind to the rest

selfless, giving, caring

even when you just wanted an escape, you came to the aid of your brothers

you gave the ultimate sacrifice & paid the price

everyone mourns you

when the battle is won & dream locked away indefinitely

once everyone has come down from the high of freeing themselves from dream’s reign, the server goes into a state of grieving

there’s no denying your death

they all saw the message in chat

you’re dead

those that were close to you took it hard

niki was narrowly stopped from burning down the bakery you encouraged her to open and helped build

eret put her emotions into work on a memorial in their museum for you

even under the egg’s control, bad & ant put the eggpire aside for you

of course, those who took it the hardest is your family

when ghostbur learns of your death, he’s distraught

he doesn’t quite know how to handle the information

he protects your home & only allows people to enter when he supervises them

tommy took a while to move past his anger & deal with the fact that you’re gone

tubbo ran off to start snowchester

he chose to distract himself rather than truly process his emotions, even if you’d always done your best to break that habit of his

now that you’re not around, who’s to stop him from letting himself be numb to it all?

techno is another one of your family members who chose to barely acknowledge your passing

he became somehow more monotonous & emotionless

and phil

...

there’s no word for a parent who loses a child

wilbur was gone & of course it messed phil up to be the one to take will’s last life but by that point his son was gone

but you

you’d always been such a genuinely good person

phil did so little for you as a father

he was so absent

he never apologized to you for that

he never told you how much he loves & appreciates you & everything you’ve done to keep their family together when he couldn’t be bothered

it’s a few hours after he received the news from ranboo that all the guilt for everything he had ever put you through hit him

he broke down in his kitchen while trying to distract himself by organizing his cupboards

but all he could think about was you

you & your never ending kindness & compassion

he was never a father to you

yet you never hated him

why couldn’t you have hated him?

it would hurt less to lose you if you hated him; it’s what he deserves

he’s unworthy of your love

but he can only dwell so long on you

you are given a proper funeral

you’re buried by the seashore, somewhere between l’manberg and tommy’s abandoned vacation homes in an open field

the sever members plant so many flowers, your gravesite becomes a flower field

but soon, life goes on

it will only hurt for longer to draw out the mourning period

it would do no good for anyone

besides, you wouldn’t want the server to be sad for your sake

techno supposes it’s for the best that you died

he does his best to move on, filling his days with resource gathering and upgrading his tools, weapons, and armor while trying to think through his emotions logically

as much as he liked you

as much as everyone liked you, you were too good

you were the best of them

fate is not kind to heroes

“hello!”

technoblade is not an easy man to sneak up on, let alone scare

the greeting itself isn’t want startles him

it’s turning toward the voice to lock eyes with you

you who is dead

techno is not proud of the sound he made when he saw you but you of all people wouldn’t make fun of him for it

he just stares at you, slowly realizing what’s happened

you look desaturated, the color drained from your clothes

your skin is grey & almost translucent

you’re a ghost

“y/n.”

“hello! who are you?”

techno tells no on one of your ghost form

he even keeps the rest of the server a secret from you

he leads you to your old home & leaves you there w/ ghostbur

he hopes your and ghostbur’s combined amnesia will keep you out of harm’s way i.e. the rest of the server

he visits you occasionally but mostly leaves you be

you live happily with ghostbur for a while

he is very glad to have you back

his memory is nearly as bad as yours, so the story of the server & what happened to you when you were alive is only given to you in bits & pieces that are near impossible to fit together

it was only a matter of time before someone came to visit your house

“...y/n?”

it’s tubbo who finds you first

or he finds your ghost

(tubbo) y/n! oh my god! you’re a ghost! you’ve come back!

(you) hello! *whispers* ghostbur, who is this?

(ghostbur, whispering obviously) that’s tubbo, one of your other brothers i’ve told you about

(you, whispering) oh, right

(tubbo) how long have you- oh, this is incredible! i have to tell tommy! he’s been so sad since you died; he’ll be so glad to see you!

tubbo messages tommy, who is skeptical but reluctantly comes to your house anyway

but there you are

your ghost anyway

which is good enough, honestly

(tommy) y/n!

you catch him in a hug easily, even if you’ve never met him before

(tommy) you’re alive!

(you) no i’m not. i’m a ghost!

techno happens to check in on you when tubbo & tommy are there

bad news for technoblade: you’d told them about techno leading you here

meaning: tommy knows techno hid you from him & everyone else

needless to say, he is not too happy about that

(tommy) you hid her! you kept her away from us!

(techno) tommy, you have to understand-

(tommy) i don’t have to understand shit! you hid her from us! you lied to us!

(techno) tommy-

(tommy) you kept her from everyone! you’re selfish and you’re a liar and you’re horrible and-

(techno) i did it to protect her! she’s been hurt enough protecting others; it’s our turn to protect her. the only way we can do that is by leaving her alone

(tommy) she’s my sister

(techno) your sister is dead, tommy. for once in her life, let her have peace

tommy gives up on techno & goes to you instead

(tommy) y/n! y/n, we can bring you back. we can revive you. well, dream can revive you but he’s in prison so he has to do what we say so we can bring you back. we can be a family again. don’t you want to come back?

(you) ...no

that

...

that isn’t what tommy was expecting

(tommy) what?

(you) if alive y/n comes back, i won’t exist anymore. and i’ve only just got here. i don’t want to go yet

(tommy) don’t you understand how much y/n means to me? y/n has to come back. she has to. she’s so important. not just to me but to, um... tubbo as well! right, tubbo? don’t you want y/n back?

tommy looks to tubbo for some backup but the shorter boy looks away

(tubbo) i think we need to let y/n go, tommy

the betrayal that fills tommy’s chest is soon gone as he locks eyes with techno

tommy knows techno is right

you’re too much of a good person

you’re too willing to sacrifice yourself for others

even as a ghost your kindness is blinding

this server will only drain you of everything you have yet again

he will drain you of everything you are

he’s just tried to convince you to cease to exist to bring back the former version of yourself

(you) i’m sorry. it’s just- i’ve heard there are these really pretty blue flowers in the swamp biome that i haven’t got to see yet-

(tommy) no. it’s fine. i’m sorry. i-... i should go.

tommy leaves your house & tubbo goes with him

even if tubbo caught on a bit sooner to techno’s reasoning, he’s still concerned at his friend’s sudden change in character

(tubbo) tommy... are you alright?

(tommy) ...i really want her back

(tubbo) i do, too. but she’s gone

(tommy) she doesn’t have to be

tubbo can’t argue with that

(tommy) but... maybe it’s for the best

(tubbo) really?

(tommy) yeah.

(tubbo) but just earlier you were telling me about your plan to get the revive book from dream

(tommy) techno’s right, tubbo. all everyone- myself included- has ever done to y/n is take. and she’s given everything

(tubbo) because she loved us

(tommy) as much as she loved us and as much as we loved her... the only thing we’ve ever brought her is pain. i think now... now is her time to rest.

(tubbo) ...that’s very pog champ of you, big man

tommy had planned to visit dream as many times as it took to get the revive book location off of him so he could revive you, but now he’s accepted that he needs to move on

he needs to move on from you & dream & everything dream has put him through

he decides to pay one last visit to dream, put him behind him, & never look back

he’s ready to start a new chapter in his life, one without dream

and the first one without you

but then he’s locked in the prison

two weeks pass

nearing three weeks & tommy still isn’t allowed out of dream’s cell

he’s irritated and annoyed and most of all he’s scared

but he can’t let dream know he’s still afraid of him, that’s why he pisses dream off enough to the point of being beat to death

tommy begs him to stop

but then he’s gone

everything is dark

black

empty

nothing

is this what death is?

conscious in absolute nothingness?

tommy’s feet feel the ground beneath him

his senses come back to him

it’s still dark but he feels as though he can see again

where is he?

heaven?

no, probably hell

or maybe neither?

both...?

what the hell happened?

the first thing to break the silence is the voice tommy has known since he was an infant

the voice of the person who raised him

the voice of the person who has always been there for him

the voice of the person who he has finally let go of

your voice

saying one simple word

“tommy?”

[carmillas-vampiric-rage]

Silco x Reader, if you were pregnant

Silco x Biracial GN!Reader

Ended up losing my mind and writing a tiny drabble at the end of this (was not my intention but it's adorable so you know) most of this though is complete and utter crack, idk why these hdcs popped into my head but they did, and I hope you appreciate them lol.

Dude would legit be a helicopter mom (saw someone else say it like that and 100% agree) absolutely be like this: 👁️👄🔴 at you 24/7. Stares at you all the time because he's afraid the baby's just gonna like, fall out of you. You so much as laugh in a weird way and he's like "omfg are you okay should I call the doctor?!😭". You always laugh at the way he acts. Telling him you're fine and that he can relax, that he doesn't need to be ringing his hands every two seconds. You're very soft with him though, even if you tease him a little, as you understand he's just concerned about you and the baby.

While Silco is very excited to meet his future child, he has this weird thing where he almost looks at his future kid as any enemy.(OH OH THE MIS-sorry). Like obviously he sees everyone else as an enemy too. (OH OH THE-*GUNSHOT*), he lets no one near you, (within reason of course), but since he cares about you so much and would literally die and kill for you, he sees this baby of yours and his as almost a parasite. Since you're pregnant, you're obviously dealing with a lot of changes and symptoms: morning sickness, aching and swelling feet, trouble sleeping, general uncomfortableness etc. And Silco basically gets mad at the baby. Like legit this man might fight a baby. Sometimes when you're dealing with really bad nausea and he's near you doing as much as he can to ease your symptoms, he's glaring at your belly-at the baby- because HOW DARE THIS BABY MAKE YOU FEEL SO FUCKING AWFUL. It's clearly irrational. Obviously. Cause as we've seen from Dad!Silco, he'd legit burn the world down for his kid (or realistically defend the fact his kid (Jinx) burned down the world down...) So OF COURSE he's gonna love and protect this kid with his life, but since he hates seeing you in any type of discomfort, and his emotions have gotten all out of wack too, this irrationality is very present. When you found out -after Sevika caught him glaring at your belly and demanded he tell her what the hell that was about- you found it hilarious and adorable and almost sweet, he was just being his protective self. Sevika nearly died of laughter and literally couldn't breathe after finding out, and that was probably the closest thing her and Jinx had to a bonding moment as Jinx too nearly collapsed from laughter as well. Silco was mortified and embarrassed, and blamed the baby.

Would obviously be in the delivery room with you. I've seen some hcs where he's waiting outside a nervous wreck and losing his mind (and obviously he'd still be that and I still like those hcs) but I cannot imagine our guy leaving you alone to give birth. First off, he wants to be there for you and help as best he can, and second of all, HE TRUSTS NO ONE (except you Jinx and Sevika of course 😘), so of course he'd be in there with you. Those doctors could be hired assassins or double agents or some shit. Of course he's done thorough research on what doctors interact with his family, but that doesn't stop the distrusting thoughts from running through his head. He's glaring at the doctors and nurses every other minute, judging every decision they make and making it very known. And if it wasn't for the fact he was literally The Eye of Zaun™- they'd have kicked him out immediately. (Side hdc: I picture one of the nurses literally hates him with everything in her being, and detests him questioning and demanding everything, and has thought about is it worth the risk of the unstable blue haired girl, and the love of his life going after her, and after weighing her odds... It was almost worth it.)

Speaking of the delivery room, like I said Silco would be in there with you the whole time doing whatever it is you needed. Holding your hand, kissing your forehead, telling you sweet words of comfort, letting you shatter his hand bones, distracting you with gruesome stories about work that would horrify the doctors, bring Jinx and Sevika in to also distract you, let you crush his fingers and hand, would never take it personal if you told him to fuck off because he understands you're in great pain, kisses your forehead again because you love that physical touch, would never leave your side, you don't want him to, doesn't need his hand anyway, he's lived life well enough with one eye, he can do it with one hand too, would have you in the most comfortable bed in the universe with any and all things from home that would make you more comfortable. This man will do any and everything to make the birth as easy a process as possible and you absolutely love him for it. (you'd apologize profusely afterwards though for cursing at him and he'd hear none of it).

Would be so awestruck and nervous to hold the baby. I think it's fandom consensus Silco would be a lil nervous guy when about to hold his newborn child. They look so small and tiny and delicate. You'd be holding the baby, exhausted and so happy, and he'd be right near you of course, with Jinx on the bed with you, promising all the cool weapons she'd be inventing for them, and Sevika would be hovering over with her cigarette (to the horror of the doctors) nodding at how strong the baby looked and how a lot less annoying they looked then Jinx, to which Jinx would give her the finger. Silco would be quiet the whole time, just watching you and the baby and Jinx and Sevika. His little family. He saw the whole birth, cut the umbilical cord himself, and yet his hands trembled with anxiety at the thought of holding something so tiny. You'd finally look at him, realizing how quiet he'd become.

"Do you wanna hold them?" You'd ask smiling with kind understanding eyes that spoke way more to Silco then any words could.

He'd pause, thinking about his next words. "I... Don't know..." He'd finally say.

Jinx and Sevika would encourage him, excited and serious tones hitting him as he looked at his baby. He wouldn't be able to help the tiny itty-bitty smile from appearing on his face as Sevika and Jinx continued to encourage him.

"You don't have to yet, if you're not ready." You'd cut in gently, immediately silencing Jinx and Sevika.

Silco shook his head slowly. "No... I want to hold them... I just... I've never done this before." He'd look at you with a rare moment of vulnerability. "What if I mess up..."

You'd smile at him, your emotions all over the place from just delivering an entire human, and you could feel the tears brimming in your eyes.

"You'll do perfect." Is all you say. Silco takes a breath and nods, shaking the nerves off him.

"okay, I want to hold them." He says.

There's a lot of maneuvering and chaos as you begin to hand the baby to him, soft, kind directions that the nurse had told you not that long ago, along with similar additions from Jinx and Sevika, loud and probably unneeded, but very much appreciated by Silco as he took his baby in his arms, wide eyed.

He would stare at the tiny bundle, the wrinkly little face and squeezed shut eyes -Jinx and Sevika had been roasting only minutes before - with complete awe, it's almost as if he's holding his breath. They have your skin tone, your coily hair, his sharp nose. Cute and pudgy, yet his nose nonetheless. He can't help but smile at that. You can literally see all his emotions through his face, his eye, as he stares down at your baby. He has a very rare, soft smile on his face as he brushes a finger gently over the baby's cheek, earning an adorable coo from them as they move around in their snug blanket.

"Awwwwwwwww!!" Jinx mutters with her hands clasped.

Sevika turns away whipping her eye and mumbling about dust in the room.

You stare at Silco with tear filled eyes as you gently put a hand on his arm. He looks down at you, his soft smile still on his face. The baby coos again and lets out a little cry, then returns to sleep.

"they're perfect." Silco says to you, there's a slight crack in his voice and you squeeze his arm gently.

"Yes they are, my love." You whisper, brushing a loose strand of his hair from his face. You can tell the slight nervousness has returned and he gently hands the baby back to you, nearly getting thrown to the ground (again) as Jinx gives him a hug. He returns it, planting a kiss on her forehead. Jinx scoots near the baby again, talking about a super unique middle name they have to give them. Sevika- having recovered - will disagree with every one of Jinx's suggestions and offer up her own.

"Diggly is a terrible middle name, Sevika." Jinx will say with narrowed eyes.

"It's more unique and normal than 'Thunderbomb'." Sevika will retort back.

Silco will find a spot next to you on the bed, wrapping an arm around you and planting a firm kiss on your forehead. You smile, leaning into the kiss. The baby coos for a third time, this time, raising their pudgy little hands out. Silco will let the baby trap one of his fingers as he whispers to you.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

[zeenmrala]

By The Light Of The Second Moon

A Darth Maul x F/AFAB!Reader Fanfiction

chapter four: in the trees, an electric feel

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CHAPTER SUMMARY: You try to come to terms with the stranger’s cruelty, and when you return to the woods, you are surprised by what you find. RATING: Explicit. This work is strictly for those 18+ due to sexual content. MINORS, DO NOT INTERACT. WORD COUNT: 3.5k CONTENT/TRIGGER WARNINGS: Angst, anxiety, loss of a parent/family member, overprotective father/family. Smutty/dirty thoughts. CHAPTER SONGS: saturn, sleeping at last. electric feel, henry green. A/N: I just love Maul so much. hehehe ♡

Chapter Four

In the Trees, an Electric Feel

The next day feels as if it will never end. The morning drags by slowly, then the afternoon, the evening – the whole day is a blur, long and dull. You aren’t needed for any work today. There is nothing for you to do in the surgery, no household chores either - you even go out of your way to find Mellie and ask if you can watch Lia, or help her with her sewing. You are dismissed by everybody.

You even consider sneaking out this afternoon, to go and find the spaceship on the other side of the Great Wood by the light of the sun. You wonder if meeting a new, friendly traveler could lift your spirits. But you cringe at the thought of somebody in town seeing you and reporting back to your Father.

As frustrated as you are, as much as you detest his strictness - you hate the idea of letting him down, causing upset for him, disobeying him. You know the pain he has experienced in his life, the worry he holds for you because of what happened to your Mother. Even though you don’t know how she died, as you were young when it happened. One evening when cleaning up after dinner, unprompted, your Aunt confessed that you shared a great likeness with your Mother. You can see that moment now, the way she paused, her hands gripping the counter in front of her, her eyes glazed with tears as she spoke. “You are so similar to Lamarna. In both body and spirit.” That is the only time she has ever mentioned her to you, and has never spoken of Mother ever again. It made more sense from that point on, why your family were terrified at the idea of losing you – they can see history repeating itself, that fire for the thrill of the unknown that burns in your eyes once burned in hers. Even so, it still feels unfair to be so heavily compared to your Mother, a woman you will never know. Your whole life you have been trying to find a comfortable balance between doing what you want and to be seen doing what they want. You want to be happy, but you do not want them to be unhappy. For the first time in years you seem to be walking the line successfully.

So you will not risk ruining it all by being too careless. You will wait, as usual, for the second moon. Subsequently, there is nothing to distract you from the colossal embarrassment of last night. You spend the entire day in your bedroom, only leaving to eat at mealtimes – so, left to your own devices, you think over the encounter again and again and again. You examine it, cringe over it, and think of all the things you should of said. You wonder why he was so abrasive, where he came from, how long he would be staying. Despite his insults and intimidation, there is just something about him. Something enticing, something that makes you unable to stop thinking about him. And it is so vexing because he was so rude and cruel.

He made you cry.

The memory unexpectedly triggers a defensive anger in you – and you now scold yourself, not for your ignorance, but for allowing the Zabrak to speak to you in such a way. At how you cowered so easily. You decide that if you meet again tonight, you will shut out your anxiety, your ego. You will not grant him the satisfaction of making you fawn.

After considering this, your feelings begin to shift. The humiliation and self-frustration concerning your ignorance fade away. They transform into that of a steadfastness, an optimism that shines through the insecurity, because if anything, at least you are determined. You have and will continue to make the best of your circumstances. If that means taking information from outsiders at face value to learn more of the galaxy - then so be it. You will not let the opinion of a stranger stop you from trying to learn and better yourself.

Even if said stranger is domineering and cruel, and his words sting like the claws of a rabid tooka.

---

The night rolls by as you survey the Great Wood from the window. The second moon slow-dances into the sky, the familiar buzz of your brief escape thrums inside you, and the surgery is quiet and dark.

The time has finally come. You partake in your usual routine, pouch of drawing tools in hand as you climb down the tree, squeeze through the gap in the fence, and walk silently to the woods, guided by the blue light of the moon.

You arrive, inhaling the fresh scents of moss, mud and greenery – it is so quiet, and not in an eerie way, but peaceful and comforting. The only noises are the crunch and shuffle of grass and leaves beneath your feet which lull you into the familiar calm of the Great Wood. You eventually find the rotten tree you hid your sketchpad in. You retrieve it and traverse the woods deeper, intending on making it out to the other side, to the other spaceship. As you make your way, you consider - what if it is no longer there and you spend the entire night walking for nothing? These hours are so precious to you, and you do not want to waste them. You eventually decide to climb up a thick, towering tree that will allow you to climb to a vantage point, to see if the starship is still there. Halfway up the tree, your nerves betray you when your eyes accidentally glance downwards. The sheer height of the tree you are climbing hits you and it knots your stomach. You decide to settle down on to a sturdy, fat branch for a moment. For a break, to breathe away the anxiety of climbing so high. To distract yourself, you flip to the back of your secret sketchpad and look at your latest portrait. To your surprise – it’s rather good, and you find yourself smirking. You have captured the Zabrak’s pretentious scowl perfectly, and it looks exactly like when he told you that you were irritating. You stifle a giggle as you run your eyes over the drawing, thoroughly impressed with yourself. Those intense eyes, you have somehow translated the superb heaviness of that fixed stare.

That weight that, you notice, you can feel now…

“Why did you come back?” His voice takes you by such surprise that it makes you physically jump, destabilising any grasp that you had on your worry of falling off of the tree. Luckily you picked a wide branch that comfortably holds your weight. You groan, annoyed by his sneaking up on you, and then the audacity of his question - this is your planet, you have been coming to these woods your entire life. But the rich, deliciousness of his voice rings in your ears, and almost makes you forget about his abrupt rudeness – almost.

You turn to where the sound came from. Framed by leaves, he perches on the branch of a tree adjacent to you. He is the perfect predator in wait, assessing you silently, poised and prepared. You did not hear him following you, there was no sign he was anywhere nearby whatsoever. You consider the danger you are in, high above the ground and unable to run away, how severe his expression is… You force yourself to swallow your anxiety. You will not allow him to intimidate you again. So you decide not to reply, ignoring his question as he so silently does to your own. You drag your eyes away from him, looking instead at the version of him in your sketchpad.

In your peripheral vision, you see his frame relax. You sneak a quick glance at him as he sits down, legs dangling over the edge, and he settles. A small, wave of relief washes over you at the sight of him no longer ready to pounce on you like some kind of vicious animal. He is still soundless, his gaze is unyielding. You make a show of ignoring him, flicking through and reading random pages of your sketchpad, though you do not take any of the information in. His eyes on you are much too distracting. After a few minutes of sitting in awkward, tense quiet - you bite.

“Why are you watching me like that?” You try to sound as exasperated and uninterested as possible.

 You swear you see a flash of amusement across his hard features. He doesn’t reply.

“Now you’re the one being irritating,” you spit harshly, any semblance of apathy disappearing completely.

He chuckles softly. You find that the noise is comforting, and then curse yourself for being so soft.  

“Did I really offend you so terribly?” He asks, an edge of patronising sympathy to the question.

You strongly assert a “yes,” and shoot him a hard glare for good measure. He pulls up and crosses his legs, balancing with casual litheness on the branch of his tree, which is much thinner than yours. You both watch each other carefully, until he slightly nods his head, and with a small smile, breaks the silence. “My apologies.”

Your face warms, and a smile tugs at your lips as his apology tugs at your heart. Kriff, you are so weak. He is not intimidating you anymore, but he is enticing you. You glance up at him, and say, “okay.” It is quiet again, and though it seems he is comfortable with the awkward silence, you are not. So you decide to answer his question after all.

“I came back, because I always come here.”

“In the middle of the night?” He seems genuinely curious. “I like the light, of the moon.” You gesture towards the sky, where between leaves and branches, you can see the moon glow among the sprawling stars. “It’s…nice.”

There is a pause. Then, he quietly responds with one word.

“Maul.” “What?” “My name. My name is Maul.” You nod, taken slightly aback. You tell you him your own name. His harsh face somewhat lightens at the sound of it on your lips. Your introduction to him makes your heart flutter. Maul. It suits him. How dangerous.  

“You cannot again ask me why I am here.” He asserts, as if he is establishing ground rules to this interaction between the two of you. “Because I cannot tell you. No matter how…curious you are.”

Ah, of course. Though a flare of frustration rattles in your chest, you nod. You’re well versed with not knowing, being unaware of secrets. Something nags you in the back of your mind – why would he not just lie, if he cannot or does not want to tell you the truth? You cannot help but feel like he is teasing you in some way. “Ah, I see. Need to know.” You roll your eyes, relaxing further back into the core of the tree, leaning your head against it, then tilting your eyes towards him.  

He blinks as if in confirmation, then flashes a small smile that seems to imply something.

So you ask, “what?”

“You are just so strange.” He looks amused.

“Me?”

He nods.

Well…you are the one climbing trees alone at night. You cock your head and purse your lips in a show of consideration, which elicits a low, growl of a laugh from him. The seductive noise flips your stomach.

“Should I be expecting your presence every night?” He asks, quietly.

You counter. “You mean, should I be expecting yours?”

A sly smile. “Yes. For the time being.” He considers for a moment and then asks, “would you prefer that we do not interact?”

No.

You find him thrilling, and this is the most intriguing contact you have had with an outsider ever. The threat of it ending so abruptly almost makes you whimper. You try not to come across too eager, and as casually as you can muster, you reply. “No, no - I enjoy visitors.” You indicate to your sketchpad. “Even if…they lie to me. Or, in your case, withhold truths.” You try to hide your resentment of that fact, flashing a sweet smile. You are not sure if it works, as he does not react, and there is that silence again. You sigh, hesitating slightly before asking him the question that has been eating at you all day.

“What…what was untrue in my sketchpad?” You look at him, and you can’t prevent that longing in your eyes. He senses your yearning, and his gaze switches to your sketchpad briefly, before returning to your face.

“A great deal.” He does not elaborate.

You scoff. “Very helpful. Thank you so much.”

He does not laugh at your sarcasm, or acknowledge your response in any obvious way. He does look as if he is considering whether or not to ask his next question. He decides to inquire, with genuine interest. “Why do you not leave this planet and see for yourself?”

The embers of shame and embarrassment begin to burn deep within you again, as well as your craving for that very thing. If only it were that simple.

“Because…” you ponder the correct way to phrase it, settling on, “it is not a possibility.”

He accepts that answer a bit too easily, and speaks no more about it.

“Can I ask another question?” You snicker a quick chuckle. “You just did.” He flashes a wicked smile at your laughter. “Why are you climbing this tree?”

You shrug. “I want to get a better view…” You catch his eyes flicking up, then down, then back to you, and you can tell that he does not seem to believe you. You add, “I was just taking a quick break from climbing, when a mysterious stranger started asking me questions.”

“Mysterious,” he repeats, and his smile is almost a grin, and the sight of this makes your insides flutter. “Though, not a stranger anymore, I suppose.”

“An acquaintance,” you suggest.

“Yes.” He draws the word out in that devious voice of his. He doesn’t even try to hide the way he is looking at you, intense, golden eyes lazily raking up and down your body.

Is he…flirting with you? Your cheeks suddenly burn, your heart racing at the prospect. You know that you are enjoying his lingering gaze, the way he drinks you in makes you feel desirable, and stirs up increasingly inappropriate thoughts in your mind. However, the growing warmth between your thighs surprises you, and flustered, you try to figure out a way to stop getting ahead of yourself. You tear your eyes away from him, and look in the direction of where the first spaceship should be. You decide to tell him about it, maybe he will know something of it, and you can think of something other than how it would feel to have those fierce eyes look at you without your clothes on…

“I saw a ship land beyond these woods, the same day that you arrived. I wanted to see if it was still there.”

Any softness in his face dissipates, that hard, serious expression returning. “It has gone.” You feel disappointed by that, but you are not really surprised. No one stays here for long, and you quickly accept that you have missed your opportunity to meet whoever it was that stopped by in their fancy ship. Your expression seems to concern him, and before you can interrogate him anymore about the visitors, he asks, slightly more serious in tone, “why do you care?”

You smile innocently. “We don’t get many visitors here. I like meeting people.” You pause, indicating your sketchbook, adding, “and I would have liked to have drawn them – whoever they were, and their starship.” His comment about your sketches being unimpressive comes to mind, dampening your spirit somewhat. He does not seem to be thinking the same, because he simply remarks, “I see.”

He looks to be considering something once again. It is as if every sentence or question must be definite and deliberate. Though he appears to contemplate for a while, he does not say anything else. Then he stands up, nimble and casual, as if he is safely on land, not almost thirty feet up in the air, on a tree branch. He huffs a quiet snicker at your bewilderment, but you are too occupied with your disappointment to react to him. You feel a stinging wave of sadness that your conversation could be over already, and you try to find something to say, to delay an ending. Before you get the chance, he shoots you a daring smile. “I suppose you can sketch my ship, if you like.”

You beam at him.

--

Two hours later, you sit on the floor in the clearing, sketching the ship manically from all different angles for the third time, as if this opportunity could cease to exist at any moment. Your climb down from the tree was painfully slow compared to how quickly and easily Maul did it. However, you refuse to feel embarrassed, as he descended with such agile, swift movements, you are sure anyone would feel clunky in comparison. When you made it to the last branch before the ground, he offered you his hand. When you accepted and felt his gloved fingers grip your own, that sensual heat below your navel began to flare up again. All you could think about was how firmly he held your hand when supporting you back to the ground, and how badly you wanted to see his gloveless hands, feel the skin of his fingers caressing other areas of your body. The muffled thud of your feet on the ground yanked you from your daydream, and you muttered a quiet “thank you” and snatched your hand away in a desperate attempt at containing your surprising arousal.  

As you both made your way back to the clearing, you tried to tease details out of him about where he came from, where he was going, if he knew anybody here. As he requested, you did not explicitly ask why he was here again. Even so, he did not reveal much at all, only that he was here for the foreseeable future, which made you smile. The rest of the walk was quiet, which left you with a few moments to process your rapid attraction to this man. It was clearly not enough time, because as you sketch, you are still in utter disbelief at how much you desire him.

You have had sexual relationships with men previously, though each one has been human, and from your home world. This current attraction is completely new to you in so many ways – and you have never felt so flustered around someone like you are around Maul. You look up from your sketchpad and see his eyes lingering on your own hands, and you cannot help but wonder if he is thinking similar things about your fingers and the intimate parts of his body. His eyes dart upwards to yours, and the intensity between you is so electric, it almost makes you whimper. You slam your sketchbook closed, the sudden movement breaking the tension. “I think I finished,” you say as calmly as you can.

He nods as you stand up, and watches as you brush the dirt and debris off of your dress. The third moon is in the sky now, which means you should probably return home. He notices your hesitation, and gives you a knowing glance. It sends an erotic shiver down your spine.

“I am going to head back,” you say, clutching tightly to your sketchpad and pouch of tools. “Thank you for letting me sketch your ship.”

He lets the quiet of the night sit between you for a moment before replying. “Very well.” Then he wishes you goodnight, and he says your name for the first time. The way it sounds on his lips once again stokes that delicious heat between your legs.

“Goodnight, Maul.” --

Your mind is reeling on your walk home. You stash the secret sketchpad in a new hiding place, a smaller, recognisable tree – far away from both the rotten log and the tree you hid it in previously. As much as you like this man, after his negative comments on your work, you do not want him looking in your sketchpad again. You still harbour some insecurity, and think that you always will.

When you make it back to your bedroom, you close the window gently, then lean your forehead against it, staring longingly toward the way you came from. You take a breath and allow yourself a goofy smile, using the palm of your hand to stifle an outlandish giggle. Then you compose yourself, strip naked and fall into bed, drifting to sleep with a grin on your face.

You dream you are in a hot jungle, and unforgiving rain drenches your clothes. You are looking for something, but you do not know what. You find a small lake, and floating in the water, beaten by the rain, is a single, black glove.

--

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[shijiujun]

Okay I’ve decided to do a single rec after I finish one novel hahaha because if I wait to get around to it all it’ll never happen! Anyway because @sarah-yyy​​ has been reading it and I’ve gotten a lot of asks/replies on this, I’m just going to do one huge list for one of my faves so everyone knows what’s going on and where to find things XD

- Part of Min’s ‘Why You Should Read’ Series -

Summary: 

This is set in a historical setting where men can marry other men, but it’s usually reserved for sons who were not borne by the official main first wife of the patriarch of the family, i.e. a son born by a concubine in a family may be forced to marry a man to keep him from being able to become the next family’s patriarch for example. This is because any family’s next leader needs to be able to have children with a wife who married in as a zheng shi (lawful wife), and not a ce shi (second wife) or any other concubines/mistresses etc. Most of these men who marry other men have to take them as their zheng shi and lawful spouse in a sense, and the same goes for the royal family.

The story starts with third prince Jing Shao, who was forced to marry Mu Han Zhang, a Marquis’ second son, by the Empress and Emperor, thereby officially and effectively cutting him out of the race for the throne. He’s mocked by the public as everyone knows what this means, and for the next 10 years, he neglects Mu Han Zhang, blaming him for his predicament, and deliberately showers his three other concubines with affection in front of him, but 10 years later, when Jing Shao is accused of treason, everyone leaves him except for Mu Han Zhang. They are chased to the edge of the cliff by soldiers, and Mu Han Zhang dies in his arms having taken an arrow meant for him earlier, and Jing Shao jumps off the cliff with his dead body, and promises that if there’s a next life, he will do everything Han Zhang says, and love him.

He wakes up immediately on the night of his marriage with Han Zhang, and realizes that he’s been given a second chance to make everything right. Han Zhang is definitely afraid of him, humiliated and angry when he first wakes up after how rough Jing Shao was with him earlier on their wedding night, and he has no memories of their past life. Jing Shao then sets to SHOWER HAN ZHANG with affection, love and basically everything, because he realized that this is the only person who stayed by his side until the end, and then he falls in love with Han Zhang properly this time, and also deals with every single person who maligned and schemed against him in his previous life, with Han Zhang by his side.

Read: 

Novel (Online) | Novel (Print) - Not Available | Novel Translations | Manhua (You’ll have to download the KuaiKan app, the chapters are currently all free)

Characters:

1. 景韶 Jing Shao - 3rd Prince and is the first out of his three other brothers to be given a title 成王 (cheng wang). He’s referred to as 王爷, and also 小勺 (xiao shao) by Han Zhang. Went out on his first war when he was 14, and was thus given a title before any of his brothers. He’s known for being a merciless, cold and fierce army general/commander, but this was before his second life with Han Zhang, where he puts on like his doting mode and is basically a dumbass XD who listens to Han Zhang with a lot of trust, which is cool and all.

He marries Han Zhang when he’s 19, and in his first life he was very reluctant and resistant, and neglected Han Zhang for 10 years, until he was charged with treason and hunted down. 

In his first life he wanted to snatch the throne, even from his blood-related brother Jing Chen, but more out of spite than anything else because he felt he was dealt an unfair hand by having to marry Han Zhang. Not only that, but Jing Shao is not his father’s favourite son, and he always felt that the emperor was biased against him. Anyway, a huge accumulation of daddy and anger issues, which is fair.

When he realizes that Han Zhang died for him, he decides he will be good to Han Zhang if they are reborn in their next life.

2. 慕含章 Mu Han Zhang - The 2nd son of Marquis Bei Hou’s, born to a concubine. He’s called by his 表字 which is 君清 (jun qing) by Jing Shao. Official First Wife Bei Wei Hou-furen and her son (who is in line to inherit the Marquis title from his father) has bullied him all his life, and wanted to push him into greater desperation by marrying him to Jing Shao, knowing he will suffer at the hands of the supposed merciless/heartless wangye. He has a weak body because of an accident when he was younger, and in his first life he was really sick after being neglected for 10 years, and knowing this in their second life, Jing Shao does everything he can to take care of him.

He is incredibly smart, has a brain for business and sales, and is also very good at handling people, especially scheming ones. He aids Jing Shao in the beginning of their second life, and then Jing Chen later as well, as both brothers begin to fight to put Jing Chen on the throne, against the 1st and 4th Princes. Is an incredibly good tactician in war as well.

3. 景琛 Jing Chen - 2nd Prince, Jing Shao’s blood related older brother who is handsome af too. His title, given later in the novel, is 睿王 (rui wang). He was misunderstood by Jing Shao in the first life as Jing Shao thought it was his brother who led to him marrying Han Zhang, and because he’s not very good at expressing himself and shows his concern to Jing Shao by nagging at him, Jing Shao always thought he hated him. In their second life, Jing Shao already knows that Jing Chen loves him and did a lot for him in his first life, and so trusts his brother and supports him right off the bat, because Jing Chen is indeed the most suited person for the throne.

He has a wife and a concubine, 3 sons and 2 daughters at this point. He ends up helping Jing Shao a lot, and when he realizes that Han Zhang is way more adept at politics and the whole scheming thing than Jing Shao is, he begins trusting Han Zhang a lot more as well! There’s a surprise with Jing Chen hahaha which I loveee and could see, but wasn’t sure until they confirmed it in the last few chapters AHAHAHAHA.

Other Notable Characters:

1. Song Ling Xin (Second Wife) on the left, and two other concubines on the right

They’re pretty much vying for Jing Shao’s attention, but at this point apparently he hasn’t slept with any of them before. Song Ling Xin is the daughter of the Military Department’s Head Song An, and Jing Shao married her initially out of interest. The right most concubine (I forgot her name oops) was a gift given to him by his oldest brother, the 1st Prince. The two of them played a huge role in Jing Shao’s downfall back in his first life, and so in his second life, he especially detests Song Ling Xin. Plus the three of them keep bullying Han Zhang in the beginning, but thankfully Jing Shao is like: “Anything my Jun Qing wants”. They don’t stay around for long either, watch as Jing Shao gets rid of them like he’s swatting flies.

2. Xiao Yuan & Zhou Da-Ge

This is another male couple who’s been married for 7-8 years if I recall. Xiao Yuan is one of Jing Shao’s important allies and friends in the second life, because in Jing Shao’s first life, this was one of the only young officials in court who spoke up for him when the accusations of treason came about. Zhou Da-Ge is his husband, who is a cook running a restaurant in the city. Whenever Zhou Da-Ge bullies Xiao Yuan in bed a little too much, Xiao Yuan punishes him by making him wear colourful clothes out (pink, bright yellow, purple, etc.) and thus he has a reputation for being eccentric and a weirdo, but oh well, all for love.

3. Gu Huai Qing

One of Jing Shao and Jing Chen’s most powerful allies, and he becomes blood-sworn brothers with Jing Shao without realizing who he is. Later he takes a liking to Jing Chen.

(Will update with photos when they come out, but they’re a bit further into the story so we won’t have them for a few months yet ahahaha)

Amazing Scenes:

Jing Shao & Han Zhang first looks in the manhua

Jing Shao being THAT clingy husband and helping Han Zhang to wear his clothes properly so cute!!!!!

Han Zhang and Jing Shao in their first lives (10 years later), about to die, sad and then Jing Shao jumps down the cliff with Han Zhang’s corpse, regretful cuz he a dumb bij

Jing Shao unable to resist kissing Han Zhang’s cheek, realizes what he’s doing, and gets embarrassed LMAOOOO 没出息!!!!!!! (This is different from the novel, because in the novel Jing Shao just kisses and is done with that, the embarrassment part is drawn in only in the manhua hahaha)

Other Things I Like in the Novel:

Jing Shao is like, he does a 180 entirely and he is very cognisant of all his faults and what he did wrong previously, and how badly he treated Han Zhang, so he legit forces his brain to go “I will listen to Jun Qing from now on” and he really sticks to it!

Loves kissing and teasing Han Zhang, but doesn’t force him into bed after their wedding night, and instead goes to Xiao Yuan and asks for tips on how to make his partner feel less scared about sex

The both of them end up with a pet tiger?!! That’s called Xiao Huang (little yellow) LMAO

They nap together a lot which I love <3333

Jing Shao knows he’s bullied at home, so when they go back to the Marquis Bei Hou manor, he holds Han Zhang’s hand in front of everyone to let them know Han Zhang has someone to back him up

Brings Han Zhang to war because he “cannot concentrate if Jun Qing isn’t with me at all times” - and asks for special permission to do so

Han Zhang notes that since he married Jing Shao, as the ‘wife’ he is supposed to serve Jing Shao, but it’s always Jing Shao serving him - Getting water for him, bringing him to baths, putting clothes on for him, putting food in his plate if it tastes nice, massaging his back and waist etc. - and best is he doesn’t have to deal with any in-laws?!! HAHAHA

Jing Shao gets revenge on those who hurt Han Zhang when he was younger for him, and the outcome is pretty hilarious but well-deserved

EPILOGUES are cute af!!!!

[mrsalwayswrite]

Fight For You (Ivar x Reader)

This is my contribution to @youbloodymadgenius​ 1k celebration! Congrats, love! 

My prompt was: You had my curiosity. But now you have my attention. (Django Unchained)

Warnings: a smidgeon of violence, talk of premeditative murder of a spouse, some possessive!Ivar? my poor attempts at humor and flirting.

Words:3900

  The talking of the other earls, jarls and king grated on Ivar's nerves. Instead of threatening to cut out all of their tongues and make a necklace of them, like he strongly desired to do, he silently reclined in his seat fuming. It was both boring and infuriating to listen to these lesser men squabble amongst themselves like children. But like Hvitserk frequently reminded him, the others needed to be included in the planning. Even if Ivar despised it. 

 So he sat back, pretending to listen to the others as they attempted to make a battle plan. Even if it was a piss poor attempt and honestly, laughable. He kept silent for now. For he had his own plan and when he felt he had given them enough time to argue, he would share what they needed to know to fulfill it. He never shared the full plan; he would never give another that kind of power and knowledge. 

 King Harald Finehair was the least incompetent of the warriors and since at least half of their heathen army was there due to him, many listened intently when he spoke. 

 "If our scouts are correct, our army vastly outnumbers anything the town has." King Harald placed both of his hands on the table, drawing the attention of those under the meeting tent to himself. "I say tomorrow we attack with our full force. If they barricade themselves in, then we burn the gate down."

 "How great will our casualties be then?" Earl Liefson questioned, eyeing most of Norway's King with scrutiny. 

 "Did you not hear King Harald? We outnumber them! Those that die during the fight will certainly go to Valhalla to feast with Odin and Thor. Let us attack without fear or worry!" Jarl Haakon boasted, slapping a hand to his broad chest in emphasis. 

 This time Ivar did not try to suppress his annoyance. He rolled his eyes at the Jarl, practically biting his tongue to withhold a scathing comment. Looking to his left, he caught the gaze of his brother, Hvitserk, who at least was better at hiding his irritation. 

 There were many men that Ivar detested, many men he loathed. Jarl Haakon was most certainly in the top five. The man loved the sound of his own voice and any idea spewed from his mouth usually equaled in value to a pig's fart. At first, Ivar could not fathom how the Jarl managed to stay in his position of power. Sure, he fought like a berserker and thrived on bloodlust like many Vikings…. but he was a pompous, narrow-minded idiot. 

 Yet once the meetings started, plans being drawn for this great raid, Ivar figured it out. 

 It was you. 

 In the beginning, some of the other earls initially protested when Jarl Haakon brought you into the meetings; especially since you were no shieldmaiden, you were only his wife. But when he flatly stated either you came with him or him and his men left, their protests died down. Those very men were further silenced when King Harald greeted you warmly and welcomed your company. 

 At first, Ivar loathed your presence, thinking you were there just to satisfy your husband's ego, his continuous need to show off his beautiful wife. It was only after plans were finalized and Jarl Haakon looked down at you, his hand possessively on your lower back, that Ivar realized you were not there just to look pretty. 

 You surveyed over the "map" drawn into the dirt, eyes analyzing. Then you did the most unexpected thing. You critiqued the plan. Perfecting it in ways that even Ivar had not seen. 

 And the bloodthirsty prince could only sit back in shock and awe. 

 It was after that first encounter, whenever you were nearby, his gaze never strayed far from you. 

 Now, you stood silently next to your husband, focused on the plan being discussed. Instead of fully listening to the others, Ivar watched you. The way you bit your lower lip in concentration, the faint twitch of your right eye when someone said something you disagreed with, the quiet way you controlled your husband with a simple word or touch. It all mesmerized him. 

 What inflamed him the most was the few times your gaze would rise to meet his. The way you would peek at him through your lashes like a shy maiden, as if silently asking for his permission, then speak to the group of men. The power and intellect you kept hidden would be unveiled with your words. It was enough to make Ivar salivate every time. 

 Most women bothered Ivar with their whimpering or tedious nature, even most of the shieldmaidens made him want to plunge a dagger into them. But not you. You were not most women. Ivar swore on all the gods that you were a Valkyrie sent from Odin to bless him, to confirm his favor with the Aesir and his lineage tracing back to Odin himself. 

 Yet somehow you were married to that fool of a Jarl….and Ivar hated it. 

 "What say you, Ivar?" King Harald asked, drawing the prince back to the current conversation. The gazes of the other leaders weighed heavily once their eyes turned to Ivar, but instead of buckling underneath their inquiry, he thrived. 

 "I say why waste time and men? Let us lead a main force from the river like they expect us to do. A second force will attack from the north, hiding in the woods. My scout says there is a second smaller gate that their hunters use to leave the town. Because of its location, it is not well defended. Using that, there will be no need for a siege." He confidently explained his plan, looking around the meeting tent. A knot in his core tightened as he saw the corners of your lips turned upward in a brief smile and the bright gleam in your eyes. His plan was flawless, but seeing your approval bolstered his confidence, made him straighten further in his chair. 

 "Why did you not tell us about this second gate sooner?" An older earl demanded. His fingers tapped on the axe he wore on his hip, either purposefully threatening or mindlessly was yet to be determined. 

 The dark-haired prince rolled his head to the side, glaring at the man with malice in his icy blue eyes. "I waited until the information was necessary. If you sent your own scouts, they may have discovered it themselves instead of wasting their time drunk everyday we've been here."

 "A second gate is fortuitous for us." King Harald interrupted before the earl could respond. "We will lose less men. I will lead the main attack with my men. Ivar will lead the second attack since you were the one who brought this information."

 Ivar cocked his head for a moment then nodded. "Agreed." Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jarl Haakon turn to you with a silent question in his look. Without hesitation, you give a single nod and your husband smiled. 

 "What are we standing around for then? We have Saxons to kill and glory and riches to earn. Let us prepare!" Jarl Haakon loudly proclaimed, making a couple of the earls chuckle. After that everyone began to disperse back to their own tents and warriors. Word would spread to prepare for battle the next day. 

 Catching Hvitserk's eye, Ivar motioned for his older brother to accompany him. Together, they walked out of the meeting tent and past groups of warriors, tents and cooking fires. The noon sun blared down on them, causing many to seek shelter under tents or tree canopies. 

 "What is it?" The flaxen-haired warrior asked, falling easily into step with his little brother. 

 Ivar hated how easily his brother could keep pace with him, while he stumbled along with his crippled legs and crutch. It was not Hvitserk's fault, but it was a resentment that Ivar still held nonetheless. Keeping his gaze forward, he grunted a vague reply. "I have questions."

 "Ah." Hvitserk ran a hand over his mustache as he surveyed the camp around them. After a moment, he spoke up again. "Anything to do with y/n?"

 Ivar snapped his head around to glare only to meet the amused look of his smirking brother. His upper lip curled up in a snarl but Hvitserk cut him off with a shrug.

 "What? You're not as subtle as you think you are. You're lucky her husband hasn't taken notice of your…. attention."

 "Shut up."

 "Alright…. we are going to see her though, right?"

 Ivar did not respond, instead he grit his teeth as he pressed on to his destination. Beside him, Hvitserk laughed but kept pace and any further comments to himself. 

 The two princes walked towards Jarl Haakon's tent. From observing, Ivar knew that the Jarl would be off with King Harald, talking to their warriors and finalizing their own plans. Without fail, he always postured himself to the forefront in speaking to their warriors, most likely to make sure his voice was heard just after King Harald and to boost his own ego. Even if his usefulness in making the battle plans was nonexistent. He was a warrior, through and through, but not a strategist. His value lied on his ability to wield his sword and axe on the battlefield.  

 To Ivar's surprise, you always retired to your tent right away after meetings. He witnessed on more than one occasion where your husband tried to convince you to accompany him, all to no avail. Oh, it was obvious your husband cared for you, but he also thrived on the jealous looks from others. His hand continuously rested on your lower back or around your shoulders, pulling you against him, dwarfing you with his larger frame. Frequently, he loudly proclaimed how he was gifted with a wife from Freya herself, making sure to steal a kiss as he laughed boisterously. 

 A coy smile danced on your lips but Ivar could see it hidden in the depths of your eyes, the annoyance and disgust by your husband's actions. You were a goddess on Midgard. That simpleton of a husband was not worthy of you. He should worship at your feet, begging for a moment of your divine attention. Yet, you were his lawful wife.

 And jealousy threatened to burn Ivar alive as he looked on.  

 The son of Ragnar was further enraged as he approached your tent to witness no guards posted in front of it. How dare your husband leave you undefended? He was even more of a fool than Ivar thought.

 With his usual arrogance, Ivar drew back the flap to your tent without calling out for your permission. As he stepped through, he could hear Hvitserk mutter something under his breath behind him, but still followed into the Jarl's tent.

 You stood next to a short table on the far side of the tent. Your hair was out of its typical braids, catching the prince's eye. An image of him running his hand through your hair flashed through his mind without warning. With the cloth in hand and the shallow bowl before you, Ivar knew he had interrupted your cleansing. 

 "Prince Ivar," you started, dragging the cloth down your neck sensually before setting it softly into the bowl. "My husband is not here at the moment. Would you like me to send for him?"

 "That's alright. It's you I'm interested in." He smirked as he watched you straighten further, a faint furrow between your brows. Your eyes continued to hold his, sending a thrill straight down his spine. He moved to the center of the tent, drawing closer as if magnetized by you. Leaning on his crutch, he tipped his head to peer at you. Lesser men would fear being alone with him, a Viking known for his bloodlust and cruelty but not you. There was no fear, no concern for safety in your eyes, only interest….and that amused and enthralled the crippled prince. 

 "I confess, I find your relationship with your husband…. peculiar. At first, I thought you were another pretty face, just another useless wife. But I see now, you are far more cunning and clever than you let on. Even now. Your husband is a fool, but he is intelligent enough to recognize he's need for you. So, I have been curious. Why are you still married to that oaf? I suspect there are far better suitors out there for you."

 You shrugged, taking a couple steps closer to the center of the tent. "It was the gods' will, and he is a good man." 

 "He's an idiot." Ivar deadpanned.  A muffled snort came from the direction of Hvitserk behind him but he kept his piercing eyes on you. 

 "Perhaps. He is still my husband."

 "Mmm….and do you care for your husband?"

 You glanced over at Hvitserk, who stood near the entrance, leaning against a pole casually, and then back to Ivar. For the first time, he saw uncertainty flash across your eyes but it was quickly subdued. "Why does it matter?"

 He moved closer until he stood before you, the sound of his crutch muffled by the furs covering the ground. "He is always touching you, but you never reciprocate. You are…. complacent. Tell me, honestly. Does his intellect bore you? Is that why you run back to your tent?"

 "Ivar…." Hvitserk said in warning, only to be ignored. 

 "Would you bore me?" You asked coquettishly, looking at him from under your lashes, making his heart race. "I find most men…. simple."

 "I think you know the answer to that." His mouth curved in an arrogant smile. "Is that why you steal looks at me during meetings?"

 "Or is it because I feel your eyes on me already?"

 Gods, he wanted to touch you. As you stared into one another's eyes, a silent conversation flowed between you two. It was now he finally saw what he hoped for, what he silently prayed for. A longing lay hidden in your gaze that matched his own. An understanding. A hunger that bespoke of adventure and passion. The torturous desire was enough to drive him mad with need but he refrained. He would make you come to him though, he would make you touch him first to prove your want for him. 

 "Is this…. are you two flirting?" Hvitserk suddenly asked, shattering the revealing moment. 

 "No, brother. I would never flirt with a married woman." Ivar took a step back from you, feeling the space like a chasm between you two. "I think my questions have been answered." He turned around and started towards the entrance. 

 In anger, most people revealed their true selves. He had learned that if he could say the right thing, push people the right way, their true selves, their true desires would manifest. So he decided to see if the meek wife you portrayed was accurate or just a mask, if he could draw that longing out from you. He turned his head just enough to the side to make sure you heard his next statement. "It seems you are just another pretty face after all."

 In the next step, the sharp edge of a dagger pressed to his throat froze his step. Shifting his head slightly, the edge dug further, almost piercing his skin. You stood just behind him, the dagger in your hand. 

 "I may not be a shieldmaiden but I am no helpless Saxon woman." You slowly, teasingly, dragged the dagger's tip further up his neck to his pulse point. The whole time he never removed his eyes from yours over his shoulder. The tension glided across his body, shooting a shiver down his spine. He wondered if the heated look in your eyes matched his own. If he licked his lips, could he taste the ardor saturating the air between you.  

 When you spoke again, it was with a low and titillating tone. Your breath brushed against his neck, the feeling of your body almost touching his- tormenting. His hand clutched his crutch with a white-knuckle grip, his self-control slipping away with each moment. "I always have at least three daggers on me…. would you like to try and find them?"

 "I do!" Hvitserk said, raising his hand, breaking the tension. "I volunteer!"

 You winked at Hvitserk before withdrawing the dagger from Ivar's throat and taking a step back. Ivar continued to watch you as your gaze met his again. "Do not assume just because you cannot see something, does not mean it is not there. I may look like the submissive wife but that is far from the truth."

 To say he was aroused was an understatement. Spinning on his heel, he faced you, not even trying to suppress the hunger bubbling up within him. "You had my curiosity. But now you have my attention."

 "And what does that mean, 'I have your attention'? Is there a prize?" You raised an eyebrow but the devious smirk betrayed your amusement. 

 "I always reward those who…. interest me." He shifted forward to gently reach forward and caress your cheek. A sharp inhale and the fluttering of your lashes at his touch proved his effect on you. Carefully, you tipped your head, leaning your cheek against his hand. Never before had he coveted you so strongly. His instincts screamed at him to take your hand and lead you back to his tent, to make you his forever. You were a free woman though; the choice was yours. He wanted you to choose him. 

 "You are too smart for that idiot. Leave him." He muttered, tracing a finger over the seam of your lips. 

 "It's not that simple."

 "It can be."

 You pressed a kiss to the tip of his finger. "And what will I do then?"

 "You can be my woman!" Hvitserk declared, placing a hand over his heart. 

 You giggled at the harsh glare Ivar threw his brother over his shoulder. 

 "What?" Hvitserk asked in mock innocence. “You know I would share, little brother!"

 "Hvitty, say another word and I will cut your tongue out."

 The flaxen-haired prince rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest. "Both of you need to work on your flirting. I did quite enjoy the little display you gave us, it's been far too long since someone threatened Ivar. We could make a shieldmaiden out of you yet, y/n."

 You stepped around Ivar to approach Hvitserk, much to Ivar's chagrin. He watched you give a quick peck on the cheek to his brother. Red began to color Ivar's sight, the tight grip on his crutch borderline painful.

 "I could make you very happy." Hvitserk said with a flirty wink, making you giggle. 

 The innuendo did not go over both Ivar and your heads. You smiled though, walking back towards the center of the tent. "I'm sure but I would hate to take that opportunity away from all the other women since I don't like to share."

 Ivar reached over and grabbed your arm, pulling you closer to him. The sweet smile lingered on your face but now directed at him softened some of his jealous anger. He cupped the side of your face, gazing down at you in something akin to reverence and longing. Silently, you placed your hands on his chest, staring up at him. He wondered if you caused his heart to beat or it beat for you. 

 "You fascinate me." He whispered, as if scared to utter the confession. 

 A sigh escaped you as you glanced downward at your hands on him. "If only we had met in another life."

 "Leave him. He doesn't deserve you. You deserve to be worshipped and recognized. Not treated as something to be shown off."

 "Perhaps one day." You lifted your eyes to meet his once more. "But I can't yet. An alliance relies on our marriage."

 He nodded, running his tongue along his bottom lip. It made sense. That would explain how you ended up married to the foolish warrior jarl. Lifting one of your hands from his chest, he pressed a lingering kiss to your knuckles, wishing it was your lips instead. Without another word, he started towards the entrance to your tent. His mind needed to process what it learned and how to best utilize that information for his plan. 

 Just before opening the flap, he turned back to you, surprised to see you still standing in the same spot but now rubbing your kissed knuckles across your bottom lip. Warmth and determination welled in his chest. 

 "Will you pray to the gods for our victory?"

 A smug smile curled the corners of your mouth. "I always do, but it is not necessary for who can defeat Ivar the Boneless?"

 He could not stop the grin from spreading across his face. "And do you pray for your husband's safety?"

 "That I leave to the gods."

 With one last heated look sent your way, he ducked out of the tent and back into the sunny camp.  

 "What now?" Hvitserk asked, walking beside him.

 "I need to talk with King Harald."

 "Ivar, you can't…. that’s…."

 He stopped to round on his brother, a scowl directed at him. "She deserves better than Jarl Haakon. Do you disagree?" He spat out, his wrath directed at your husband blazing once again. 

 Hvitserk sighed. "No, but…."

 "Then it's settled." Without waiting, he started in the direction of King Harald's tent. 

 Hvitserk rushed back to his side, falling into step. "So you'll pursue her after?"

 Ivar kept silent, mind already finalizing plans on how to best dispose of your husband. The battle coming up was the perfect opportunity, as if the timing was ordained and blessed by the gods. 

 "You won't be the only one. You're not the only man to watch her."

 Ivar sneered at the thought. "They will find themselves with my axe embedded in their guts if they even try."

 "So protective of her already and she is still another man's wife." 

 Ivar turned on his brother but Hvitserk just sidestepped the dagger aimed at his chest. 

 "If it's the gods' will for her to be your wife then I will help you." His older brother stated with his hands held up in surrender. "You know this. Besides I think you found your match with her."

 "She is…." The crippled prince started but his words trailed off. How could he adequately describe how you meant to him, how he longed for you, how he knew with you by his side he would be unstoppable and maybe for once in his life, actually happy. 

 "Is that Ivar the Boneless speechless? It must be love…. or the sun is getting to your head and you're going to be sick."

 "Shut up." Ivar snapped but without malice. 

 They walked for a few more minutes in silence before Hvitserk spoke up again. 

 "It will be pleasant to not hear his irritating voice anymore in meetings. We may be able to find an earl willing to just kill him for us."

 Ivar chuckled darkly. His thoughts returned to you and how he would willingly do anything to make you his wife. You were his Valkyrie, his goddess, you would complete him. Soon you would at his side, come death or Ragnarök, he would fight for you. 

[sellyoursoulforagoodfic]

Fated Epilogue

Epilogue

Ares x reader

Word Count: 2041

Summary: Time skip to Zag running around trying to fix everything; then he gets a weird message from Ares.

The affair known to most of the Underworld’s population as The Confusion of Zagreus started as most things in his life did, on a run through the place as he tested the defenses against an escaping entity for what felt like the thousandth time. He’d had Ares’ vial with him, so naturally he’d gotten a fair few of the war god’s boons. Nothing too unusual, right? That’s what he thought right up until Ares said the most curious thing.

“When next you see Thanatos, tell him that his sister wants him to visit more.”

Sister? Zagreus wondered. Than doesn’t speak to his . . . Wait, Nemesis . . . But why would Lord Ares have messages from her?

When he mentioned it to his lover, Thanatos just chuckled. “I suppose it has been a while since I last saw her,” was all he had to say on the matter.

And that set the trend that continued for a while. He’d get a message from Ares to Than, pass it on, and get some cryptic non-answer in return. It was absolutely maddening. Even when he asked others, all they had to say was that it wasn’t any of his business, which was fair, but that didn’t aid his curiosity.

Finally, all that started changing when he managed to squeeze a drop of information out of Than when he asked, “So why does Ares see your sister more than you?” while they were dining together one evening.

And without really thinking, Death Incarnate reflexively replied, “Because she lives with him in Thrace instead of here.” Of course, immediately after that, Thanatos realized what he’d just admitted and promptly clammed up, but it was something at least.

Then Demeter let slip something else in one of her messages after he’d accepted several of Ares’ boons yet again. “Ares is aiding you when you get injured, is he? I’d be surprised if Nemesis didn’t have a hand in that sort of attack.”

And that set him thinking. Revenge was her area of expertise, after all. And many of Ares’ such boons were noticeably more powerful in dealing direct damage instead of causing various other effects. Could Than’s sister have been indirectly aiding him through Ares all this time?

Then came another piece of knowledge, this one from his mother upon inquiring why Thanatos and Lord Ares seemed to be so close. 

“Well War and Death were always bound to meet frequently just from their natures, I suppose, but it could also have been because of that mess where he saved poor Thanatos from being chained in a box. I’d wager that was a big help to making their friendship grow.” Before he could ask just what that was about, she continued, “Though it could have also started back when Lord Ares almost passed away, too. I remember Thanatos being quite concerned for both him and Nemesis during all that.”

“What do you mean Lord Ares almost died? He’s an Olympian!”

“He is, but the day Hermes found him was a day that stoked fear in the heart of every Olympian,” Persephone said gravely. “They all worried about Ares’ fate despite how they regularly ridicule the man, because if he could die that meant any of them could.”

Zagreus suddenly found his mouth extremely dry and couldn’t form a response.

“Yes, that was definitely the start of their friendship now that I think on it. It was very kind of Thanatos to linger without threatening the poor dears. From what I heard, he was very calm during the whole affair even in the face of such shocking news.”

“Yes, I suppose learning even the great Olympians might die would be quite dramatic,” he murmured, shoulders sagging.

“No, that’s not--ah! You don’t know, do you?”

He perked back up. “Know what, Mother?” he prompted innocently.

She smiled kindly as she patted his forearm. “It’s not my place to tell you if they haven’t already; I’d forgotten how much they value their privacy when they can get it.”

Who is ‘they’? Zagreus wanted to scream while yanking his hair out. Thanatos and his sister? Her and Ares? Thanatos and Ares?? But he didn’t. Instead, he just smiled stiffly and nodded.

It wasn’t until he managed to broker a peace between the Chthonic gods and the Olympians that he finally got answers.

~

There was a party you were supposed to be preparing for, but you were having a hard time working up the gumption to move from your current position. Because of said celebration, you and your husband--how you’d never tire of calling him that--had arranged your schedules so that they aligned, which of course was the reason you found yourself lying in bed perpendicular to the man, using one arm as a pillow under your head on his chest while the other hand played with his hair.

His gleaming red eyes flicked over to the open, brightly illuminated window where sheer white curtains swayed softly in the breeze. “We really should be dressing; I have a feeling your brother-in-law wants to meet us sooner rather than later.”

“Yes, but it’s so rare that we get time like this to ourselves.”

His hand found the one you’d been carding through his hair and brought it to his lips to kiss. “You and I have an eternity full of moments like this ahead of us; we can spare an evening for the boy.”

You huffed dramatically. “Let it never be said that you’re not a man of your word.” A sigh left your lips, but still you pried yourself out of bed without further complaint. “Are we doing full regalia or casual?” When there was no answer, you glanced back to see that he was transfixed by the sight of your naked form heading towards the shared closet. “Ares!” you laughed, snapping his attention back to reality.

“Darling, I take it all back; you must come back to bed at once. There’s a rather pressing matter that needs your attention at once.”

Now, you rolled your eyes. “Well that pressing matter can wait until we return. Are we doing armor or not?”

From there, there were a lot of kisses, gropes, and laughter between that moment and being fully clothed--in light leather greaves and cloth chitons rather than the usual full armor, after all, Ares so hated to be unprotected or unarmed--but neither of you were really complaining.

“Boys!” Ares called down the hallway with you tucked under his arm.

Two heads of wild silver hair just like their father’s appeared from the same doorway. “Yes, Father?” they chorused.

“We’re leaving. I trust you can manage things until our return?”

“Of course, Father.” And then they were gone from sight, their snickering still echoing in their absence.

Ares chuckled as he shook his head. “Little terrors, the both of them.”

Though they weren’t yours, you’d grown to love both of the twins the moment you met them. With Aphrodite being so absent in their lives, you’d taken up the role of ‘mother figure’ quickly, and the two were practically your own by now. “Well, to be fair, one of them is Panic.” 

~

You were unsurprised at the Olympian turnout at the party; most arrived near the time when you did, but none stayed particularly long. As fond as they were of Zagreus in theory, their detest of the Underworld would always be greater. Only Ares and Demeter attended from the mountain and stayed past the pleasantries and feast. Otherwise, it was entirely the subjects of the House of Hades that were present. Fortunately, they seemed to be enjoying themselves nonetheless judging from the way Meg and Dusa had quickly roped you and Ares into conversation.

Zagreus hadn’t seemed to notice your arrival yet--too wrapped up in getting to know his mother and grandmother, you assumed--but you caught sight of Hades glaring at Ares every now and then. Every time you caught him, the harsh threat he’d delivered to Ares rang through your ears once more. 

“Set foot outside this house, boy, and you shall find yourself in a fate worse than death.” Neither of you were surprised by the warning. He was, after all, still angry about the whole ‘bursting into the Underworld without permission to save Thanatos’ fiasco.

Eventually, you and Ares found yourselves alone for a moment once Achilles and Patroclus excused themselves. You tugged the glass from his fingers to steal a sip of his ambrosia, something that’d been quite hard to find the last time you’d visited. You didn’t want a full glass, and Ares never complained about sharing.

He pressed a kiss to your temple, clearly worried about you partaking in a drink you’d never really managed to develop a taste for. “Are you alright?” he asked quietly. The drinking coupled with the knowledge of how much you hated being dragged to these things had likely set him on edge.

“I’m fine,” you assured him with a genuine smile. “These are my family, remember? Much nicer to be around than yours.”

“That’s quite true,” he murmured. No doubt, he was remembering when he and Aphrodite had been paraded around and humiliated as the entertainment at one of his family’s gatherings. His gaze flickered up as he noticed something before you did: Zagreus approaching at last. “And there’s the man of the hour!” he greeted warmly. It was hard to mistake the boy for any other given his attire was his family’s colors and the way he absolutely looked like a mix of his parents.

“Lord Ares!” Zag’s face was alight with happiness. “I’m glad you were able to make it; it’s an honor to meet you properly.” His eyes shifted to you. “You must be Than’s lovely sister I’ve heard very little about.”

You laughed lightly. You like this kid already. “I suppose that’s me, yes.”

“Frankly, I’m amazed I haven’t seen you around the House before now,” he probed curiously.

You decided to indulge him; it was a celebration in his honor after all. “I pop by to visit Mother and Hypnos from time to time, but I see Than enough that lingering isn’t worth it. I’ve gathered that you’re usually gone from the House as much as he is.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” he chuckled. “Makes sense you wouldn’t just lurk around when you put it like that.”

“Have to budget that precious time off somehow.””

“Plus, it’s sort of my fault that she resides in Thrace since I stole her all those years ago,” Ares teased.

“Stole her, sir?” Oh, how the poor boy looked so confused at those words. You were willing to bet his mind was just running back over Persephone’s situation and comparing it to yours.

Your brows furrowed. “Zag, has no one told you about Ares and I?”

“No!” his voice was laughing but had a manic edge to it. “Everyone keeps hinting at there being something going on with you two, but no one wants to clue me in! I’ve tried to respect your privacy by not asking directly, but it’s driving me crazy!”

“Oh, for Father’s sake.” Ares rolled his eyes. “I’m going to have a word with your brother about this,” he announced as he started pulling away from you.

“Wait! You’re not mad at Than are you?” Zagreus fretted. “Because I’d hate to cause strife between you because of my own curiosity, and--”

“Relax, Zag,” you soothed.

“Thanatos is the only being I would ever call my friend outside of her,” he gestured toward you. “I thought it went without saying that he didn’t have to keep secrets from you for my benefit, but apparently that isn’t the case. I’m simply going to tell him that. I’ll be right back, my darling.” With a kiss to your temple, he stalked over to where Than was loitering with his sleeping brother at the edge of the room.

When you looked back at Zagreus, he was staring at you absolutely slack-jawed, probably at Ares’ display of affection. “Blood and darkness, my Lady,” he managed to wheeze, “what is going on?”

You snorted a little, amused slightly by his turmoil. “Zagreus, Ares is my Fated. He’s my husband.”

His eyes went a little crossed as he realized it was just that simple. “Oh, is that all?!”

[danny-chase]

Do you think that Tim saved Dick in a way? Because we see Dick getting better as he gets closer to Tim and healing and getting back into the family, and ig it’s Tim who initiated that.

I literally don't have a yes or no answer for this... like most things in the Batfam - it's complicated. (Following answer is informed by 90s-00s comics, i can't really speak for new52 because it just... has so many issues one of which being erasing the relationship between Dick and Tim for *checks note* no discernable reason other than possibly *checks note* Didio hates legacy characters and wants only bad things for them so he could have excuses to kill them off or cancel their comics... idk just a guess)

Warnings: for Bruce stans - just look away i'm about to bring up bits of canon you most likely don't like, for Dick stans - Devin Grayson's run is mentioned, for the lovely anon - i wrote an essay, hope you are prepared

Tim coming into the family gave Dick a reason to occasionally hang around Bruce and i'm not sure if this is an exaggeration or not but he did sort of save that relationship - but whether that was a good or bad thing at the time, i can't really say. For sure - it starts off good, Bruce is actually trying to be a good dad (he comes down to Blud to check on Dick, adopts him, trusts him with his own city, calls him for backup, etc.). But we also see throughout Bruce Wayne: Fugitive/Murderer how unhealthy the relationship between the two can be. Dick built his core values around Bruce - if Bruce had actually killed here it would have been devastating for Dick (he was pretty much on the verge of a mental breakdown simply because they couldn't find proof Bruce wasn't guilty). The two literally got in a fist fight during the arc because Bruce was being uncommunicative and Dick couldn't take it anymore, snapped, and punched him when Bruce said "Bruce Wayne is dead only Batman now" - this tied into Dick finally having the relief and validation of being adopted and he couldn't handle Bruce stripping himself (and by extension, his fatherhood of Dick) away. In this era of comics Bruce had gotten physical with Dick before (here's me venting like an annoyed loser), and here's a clip from Bruce Wayne Fugitive that i just, *sigh*, canon Bruce, my detested.

Now on the other hand - getting Dick involved in the batfam more doesn't just mean he was hanging out with Bruce. His relationship with Tim is pretty great and I can definitely see where it was healing for a while - but also - to give credit where credit is due, the healing he goes through during this era of comics can also be attributed to Barbara and the Titans (the fab five specifically). Wally literally joins the Titans to give Dick a "social life" (me - it's because he's gay and wants to spend more time with Dick, actually, screw you DC you know i'm right). Donna plays a major part in keeping Dick's emotional well being in check. So like everything was going fine - Dick was healing, spending more time with friends, spending a lot of time with people he loved, like Tim, except he was neglecting his health and not sleeping - but overall he was in fact, managing, and moving past the deaths of Jason and some of the other Titans. With the current Titans - he was a hardass (which like ~trauma~ so I understand), but like things were going relatively okay.

And then Donna and Lilith died. And hooof Donna dying was like really really bad for his mental health.

Teen Titans/Outsiders Secret Files (2003) #1

[Image ID: Dick sits in a room staring at a photo, the phone rings in the background, and he doesn't even acknowledge it, the voice mail plays: "I'm not here. Leave a message after the beep." The photo is shown closer in the next frame, it's of the five original Teen Titans - Roy kisses Donna on the cheek, tipping his hat his other hand making the okay sign, Donna has an arm around Roy, the other hand on Dick's shoulder, Garth proudly stands beaming with his hands on his hips, and Dick has both his arms around Wally's neck. Everyone is smiling in the photo. A voice plays over the answering machine: "Dick, it's Roy - pick up the phone... c'mon... please... I know you're there... just pick up. Dick, we need to talk... you can't just... please..." End ID]

For context - the previous page noted that this is Dick SIX WEEKS after Donna died. Usually Dick's the one who moves on quickly, but Donna dying broke him in a way nothing else had before - and that could be partly because he was still recovering from everyone else's death.

Up to this point, Dick had been healing and Tim was definitely a part of that, but then DC decided to throw the absolute book, bookshelf, and library at him. Reading Outsiders (2003) it's very clear he's very traumatized, and around the same time, Devin is literally whumping him like it's the whump Olympics, breaking him and Babs up, burning down his childhood home, blowing up his apartment complex (killing all but like two of his neighbors), he's literally sleeping on fire escapes using newspapers as covering because he has nothing, and the bad thing i don't like to think about (i'll let you know if you ask but that one needs lots of tw, but if you know where i'm going you know what it is already), Blockbuster is killed and he blames himself - and loses it over breaking Bruce's one rule, Bludhaven is nuked, and he pretty much tries to kill himself.

So basically, he was on the path to healing (with Tim as part of that) before he got absolutely destroyed (and almost killed off by Didio in one of the crisis). Tim in his own right, was also going through a lot in the meantime, his dad died, Steph died, Kon and Bart died, i don't remember what else happened and i haven't read that era of Robin yet. Things were good until they weren't anymore, and sometimes i think Dick would regret ever exposing Tim to the life they live, and questions whether he should have just sent Tim packing x2. They do get to spend a year together on a mental health cruise, but then Damian comes into the picture, Battle for the Cowl happens, and they have their falling out. But whatever happened on that cruise must have been really healing for Dick because he actually kind of rocks it in this era - he keeps things light with Damian, Alfred notes at one point how he makes things easy because he has lightness in him, and he patches things up with Tim - catching him in that panel of Red Robin - from there they kind of go back to normal, there's a lightness to the way they banter with each other (also here) and Tim returns the favor (from the Red Robin incident) by pulling Dick out of the water.

They've saved each other multiple times over (physically), and in both in the Black Mirror and Gates of Gotham, Tim helps out in a period where Dick is starting to fall apart from the pressure of holding things together for so long (something Tim might feel guilty for, because he did run away from Gotham on a wild goose chase for Bruce). In that period, it's really clear that Dick saves Tim (he reminds him in RR, that someone does actually care for him) and then Tim saves Dick from being torn apart by Gotham.

I should point out - Damian, while starting off as kind of a hinderance, does eventually start helping Dick as well. By the end of their relationship (before the New52 destroys everything i love), Dick has helped Damian grow emotionally, and through that process Dick probably finds meaning and value in their time together, probably a lot like he used to feel with Tim. And of course, physically, they've both saved each other multiple times by the end of the run.

So yeah. I think Dick finds meaning in growth in mentoring his younger brothers, and it's likely a healing process, that healing just has some twists and turns along the way, and sometimes, on bad days, he probably feels like maybe he shouldn't have intervened at all, but i think on most days, he's proud of what Tim's become.

...I hope this is coherent lmao

[capitainelevi]

For @pufferssss, happy late birthday!! ❤️

Waiting for sunrise

Words: 2968

The first and last time Levi visits Petra`s grave.

Levi arranged his cravat again, self-conscious at the thought of visiting her for the first time. He stood frozen in place, with a bouquet of orange lilies in his hand. Her favorite flowers. Just a mere coincidence, not an effort on his part, of course. He never imagined he would visit her here so early on. Staring at the newly carved headstone, he tried to set aside the nagging thought that the earth underneath it only held an empty coffin.

What should he say to her?

“Your dad came to see me after the mission, and I had to tell him that I don`t even have a body to bring back home to him”?

“I failed in getting justice for you and the guys”?

“I miss your tea”?

The only words he could spurt out were “Hi, Ral.”

He groaned at his awkwardness and settled on presenting her with the flowers he chose for her. He could feel his hands getting sweaty from anxiousness, much to his confusion. He had nothing to be nervous about. It was just Petra in front of him. His subordinate. Petra, who fought by his side for years. Who swore to devote her life to him. Just his Petra.

Levi sat on the ground next to the gravestone, unconcerned about the dirt he would have to clean out of his clothes at the end of the day. “I hope you can hear me, wherever you are. I like to think you`re listening.” He never spent much time concerning himself with death and the life that supposedly followed it, but ever since losing them as well, he found himself wishing they were happy. He knew that those brats would be wasting the rest they earned to look over him, no matter how much he objected.

“I hope you like the spot I chose for you. It`s sunny, but you also get some shade from the tree. I thought you`d like listening to birds singing." On their free days, he could always spot Petra with a book on her lap, under the shade of the oak tree in their yard. He never dared to bother her, worried he would disturb the angelic aura of the image, content with being fortunate enough to catch a glimpse of it. He never dared get so close to the sun.

"I`m going to bring some flowers we can plant next time I visit. I know you had a green thumb.” Levi omitted in letting her know it only took a month for the plant in his office that she cared for years to wither away in his care. Or maybe it just knew Petra would never be back.

Levi closed his eyes, lulled to sleep by the quietness around him and the feeling of the afternoon sky on his skin, considering if someone would bother him if he moved to the tree trunk to nap. He craved some peace.

“I`m sorry I didn`t get to come earlier. You missed a real shit show in Sina.” He took a glance at his wounded leg and sighed. “It`s not as bad as it looks, no need to mother me.”

Without raising his eyes from the ground in front of him, Levi admitted to her in a hoarse voice- “I kept calling out orders for you, and Erwin had to remind me that you`re not here anymore. Like I could ever fucking forget.”

Despite the emptiness in his chest, he went on- “Eren misses you. I really wish you could help me manage that brat. You always knew what to say to him. Hange misses you. I… everyone misses you.” They left a hole behind that he doubted he would ever patch.

Levi cleaned off some dust from her headstone before promising her he would be back as soon as he could.

As promised, the second time Levi visited her, he got her some daisies to plant next to her resting place. After wiping his hands clean on a rag, Levi sat down against the tree trunk to admire his work. He was sure Petra would be proud of the progress he made regarding gardening. He had even gotten a new plant to replace the one on his desk.

“Tch, not talkative today, are we? That`s alright, you know I always talk a lot.”

Visiting her calmed his restless spirit. His anxiety over the plan, his worry over Erwin`s wellbeing, his longing to have his old squad by his side again, they were all pilling up for the last few days. Levi found himself losing even more sleep lately. But he would never tell her that since it would most likely end in another one of her scoldings.

“You`re missing it, the final push. The brat`s finally going to do it, he`s going to seal the Wall.” Levi hoped that they would be able to carry out the mission. That his squad`s sacrifice to keep Eren alive would not have been in vain.

“You`re not being fair, are you? You already know what we will find in the basement, and yet you keep it all to yourself. Tch, be like that.” Would it all be worth it? The pain, the countless sacrifices, and the lives lost along the way? He wished Petra could answer that for him.

He never wanted to upset her, but Petra always encouraged him to let others help him carry the burden. Levi took a deep breath before speaking again- “I think Eren misses you. He`s been going on about how he wants to visit you again. Bring you flowers. To help me maintain this place clean." Levi rolled his eyes again and the memory. "Like I would ever need his help with that.”

Levi took the ribbon out of his pocket and started fiddling with it, ignoring the slight pang of guilt at how he came into its possession.

“I hope you won`t mind I took that.” The first night he spent without them, Levi found himself roaming the empty corridors of the castle. When his steps took him in front of Petra`s door, the urge to hold on to something physical to remember her overtook his sense of shame. He was aware that her belongings would go back to her parents in the next few days, but he hoped the red ribbon Petra used to tie her hair with would not be missed.

“I took your patch at first. I was going to keep it in my breast pocket. To have a reminder of your sacrifice. But when I saw that kid eaten up by guilt, I knew what I had to do. I knew what you would have wanted me to do with it.” He had no regrets about that. It was the perfect way to honor the kindest soldier the Survey Corps ever had.

When the light began to fade, Levi got up from his spot and left without saying another word to Petra. He did not want to say goodbye to her. Levi felt no need for it since death could be in his cards the next day. And he could get to see her again sooner than he thought.

The third time Levi visited her, it was not with a flower bouquet in his hand but with a bottle of cheap alcohol he found on Moblit`s desk. That night, Levi allowed grief to consume him.

"Erwin died. But I have a feeling you know that already, don`t you?" Levi wiped his nose with the back on his hand, too absorbed in his anger to even care about the disgusting habit.

"Are you mad at him? Are you mad that he chose to sacrifice your life?"

But only silence greeted him.

"Are you mad that I didn`t even question it?"

No answer again. The rage burning inside him overtook him, and Levi smashed the bottle against the headstone.

"Shit. I`m sorry, I shouldn`t have done that." Levi crouched down and collected the pieces of the bottle into his handkerchief. The grief, the anger, and now the shame for denigrating her place of rest were eating him alive.

"We found out the truth, you know? It`s a shitty world out there, Ral. But I have a feeling not even that would have cut off your wings."

Levi found himself craving touch. Her touch. And for the first time in his life, he felt the need to be comforted. He smiled to himself bitterly. How cruel must the deity who created him be for making him desire the impossible?

The fourth time Levi visited her, he brought a special gift for her. A small, odd thing that Armin called seashell.

“We saw the sea today. Just a big old pile of saltwater. But you would have loved it.”

Seeing the brats play in the water with carefree smiles on their face made him yearn for a glimpse of amber hair in the picture. He missed them all dearly.

“I would have to pull you out of it by the collar of your shirt, I bet.” For as devoted and strict as she was, Petra always seemed to cause him distress. Not that he minded it, of course. Levi found himself wishing to hear her timid knocks on his door again, even in the middle of the night. He longed for those times, where she shyly approached him after needing his help in whatever problem she found herself stuck in again.

While that was not his intention when he first came to her, his heart was heavy with words he never said to her. "The world hates us, Ral." He could never imagine how someone would ever detest someone as kind as Petra just for the blood running in her veins. But if he had to be true to himself, a part of him hated Petra as well.

"Maybe I hate you too."

Petra broke his promises to him, after all. Two years ago, when death was imminent on an expedition, and Petra put down her swords in acceptance, Levi fought with her. He made her promise she would make it to the end. That she would be by his side the day they kill the last titan.

"Do you remember your promises to me? Such bullshit. Never thought you were a liar, Petra."

But Levi knew she would have never left him had she had a choice. That she would have fought for even just a second more by his side. But it never dulled the pain of losing her.

With a heavy heart, Levi said his goodbye for the evening, guilty for blaming her for things out of her control.

The fifth time Levi visited her, it was snowing outside.

It was always a wonder how someone radiating light and warmth could be a winter child. But Levi was sure he memorized the date right. It was an important one for him, after all. Levi fought to make sure he had enough time to get ready for celebrating her birthday. She deserved nothing more than a perfect day. Hange had been more than understanding, the wound left by losing Moblit still fresh in their heart.

Levi put the bouquet of twenty-two golden roses on the frozen ground. “Happy birthday. Twenty-two, huh? You`re turning into an old woman, Ral.” The irony of his words made a slight pang of guilt rise in his chest. The passing of time would never touch her again.

“I have your favorite”- he said, lightly shaking the box containing a small vanilla cake. Sugar was a rarity, but getting a cake was an unspoken rule in his squad. Their lives were too short to worry about the money. The first thing Levi noticed about Petra was the faint flower smell emanating from her. The first thing after setting his eyes on her clean nails, of course. On her first birthday that they celebrated as a squad, Levi gifted Petra a bottle of scented body lotion. And some high-quality cleaning rags, of course. But she did not pay attention to that. She and the rest of the Survey Corps never knew how to appreciate the finer things in life. But Levi did not miss the way her face lit up when he noticed something she enjoyed.

“I could never understand your sweet tooth, but today, I`m going to have a slice of cake.” Levi always refrained from indulging in this vice. Having grown unaccustomed to sugar, the idea of sweetness was unappealing to him. He always felt bad for disappointing her each year when she sat in front of him, with a small piece of cake she had cut for him. “Or two slices. Two is more appropriate anyway. If I get cavities, it`s on your ass.”

The ground was too cold for him to sit down on, and Levi made a mental note to build a small bench close to her headstone. He opened the box and eyed the cake wearily, considering if he should change his mind. He took a small bite of the cake, and he almost choked on it. “Oi, this is so damn sweet. How the fuck could you eat so much of it?” But it did not stop him from finishing his slice.

Levi expected to find some flowers lying in the snow or at least some tracks leading up to her grave.

“Does your old man still come around? I`ve never crossed paths with him since the expedition.” Sometimes, when he closed his eyes at night, he could still recall Mr. Ral`s pained expression when he realized there was no one left for him to wait for.

“Maybe it`s for the best. I bet he doesn`t want to see me again.” To see the face of the man who was supposed to protect his daughter. The face of the man his daughter wanted to devote her life to. The man who could not even bring him a body home to bury.

“I`m a shit. Ruining your birthday with talk like this.” Levi was never good at this. In his spot, Eld would have teased Petra about her first expedition. Tell her how now that she was a big girl, she ought to refrain from soiling herself again. Petra would turn red from embarrassment and elbow Eld in the ribs. Gunther would point out that despite their age, they are still children. And proceed with teasing Petra himself. Oluo would try to defend Petra`s honor to gain her attention, which would make him the target instead. Levi gave a small smile at the thoughts. He missed them dearly, more than he would ever care to admit.

Levi crouched down and cleared the layer of snow covering her headstone. He ran his finger alongside the letters of her name, wishing he would have had more opportunities to write it down.

“Happy birthday again, brat.”

The last time he visited her, Levi had company. Gabi and Falco did not give it another thought before offering to help him see her again before they would all leave for a new life. A better life, he hoped. But without her by his side, it was never going to be perfect. Gabi set down the flowers before they gave him privacy. While they never asked him about who she was, they knew Levi must have cared for her a great deal.

"Hi, brat. It`s been a while."

He had so much to say to her, and yet, he did not know where to start. A part of him expected to join her during the last battle, but fate always had something new in store for him. Levi was uncertain if it was luck by his side or a curse to watch everyone he ever cared about die. But life was looking brighter, and Levi promised himself he would never lose anyone again.

"Are Hange and Erwin with you now? How about the guys?" He wished for nothing more than to be there by their side. But Levi knew they would never forgive him if he did not try to live the remainder of his life to the fullest. And for them, he would try.

"Does Oluo still bite his tongue? Did he try to flirt with you again? Is Eld still teasing you? Does Gunther still treat you as a little sister?" Levi chuckled at the memory of their antics. He learned the hard way that he never appreciated them enough before he lost them.

"I hope there is an afterlife. I hope it`s peaceful. You all deserve it. Such a shitty end..." He closed his eyes and sighed at the words coming out of his mouth. "I`m sorry, I didn`t mean it. But you already knew that. I was always an open book to you."

Levi felt guilty for leaving the home they bled for behind, but if he were truthful, it had not felt like home to him for years. With no one left by his side, nothing was keeping him in Paradise anymore. While neither of them voiced it out, he had dreamed of a future with Petra by his side. And for her, he would try to live a long and happy life. Before he got to be with her.

"I`m sorry... for the future I never got to offer you. The one you deserved. I`m sorry for the house I never got to build for us, for the vows we never got to take, for the brats that will never play in my backyard." Levi knew Petra would encourage him to find love, but he never would again. He could never imagine a future by someone else`s side.

Levi glanced back at her grave for one last time before he set out for the remainder of his life- "I`ll see you soon. Wait for me."

ao3