#i love this meme so much guys you have no idea

[fandomxo00]

I might be a freak for this but Hugh jacking off to his younger costar who should be sleeping in the next room over (maybe like the hotel is pretty dingy because of the location of the shoot they can’t do any better and the walls are so so thin) but noiiooooo youre wide awake and doing the same and listening to him grunt out your name and you’re planning how youre going to corner him the next day and finally fuck him

note: ive wanted to do something like this for so long just needed some inspo, doesn't follow the idea to a tee but i tried-- omg im so excited!!!! we're all freaks dw 18+ below got carried away again - i have some requests wanting older readers so imma start trying, im only 19 but i like to think that maybe i am mature enough to write for older, wish me luck lmao

characters: Hugh Jackman x 30yo!Actress!Reader

You and Hugh had gotten relatively close in the last couple of months. You had to shoot in the middle of nowhere at some crappy motel and funnily enough they could only find some dingy hotel, that had a tiny lobby, they didn't serve breakfast, they barely had an ice machine. You almost laughed at the idea of a guy like Hugh staying in place like this. You knew he wasn't a snob, and the place was relatively clean, but you just saw him in a large suite with a little living room and kitchen area. The bed was only five feet away from the bed at this hotel and it didn't even have a couch.

You had texted Hugh when you got to the hotel, and you could hear his laughter from the other side at the meme you sent him. When Hugh first met you had been enamored. You were as surprised as everyone else when you'd been drawn to him like a magnetic. He had heard about your anxiety, so he kept checking up on you. Hugh was also your scene part and love interest in the film so eventually you felt this sense of comfort around him, he's seemed very trustworthy and kind. Always asking before he touched you in any scene, going over exactly what he would do. Sometimes when he pulled you in a little too close you got a little dumb drunk off of him. So, you wound up just staring at him like a dear in the headlights. But then he'd usually would end the conversation by making you laugh.

The storyline of the movie where he's engaged to a woman, though he loves her very much when he meets her younger sister the two connect and become close friends. Then you're on vacation and your sister wounds up in the hospital severely hurt, not knowing if she was going to wake up. You seek comfort in Hugh's character and the two of you have sex before the hospital calls about the death of your sister. He realizes that he's been in love with you for a while and your denial. He reveals his feelings for her. It's a whole mess but the two wound up together in the end.

Hugh wasn't going to accept the role unless he liked his co-workers, he hadn't done romance in a while, and even his last romance movie was more thriller than anything. He had been really interested in you when he heard about your journey to this movie.

You still lived in a little apartment in Brooklyn, traveling for work and trying to get as many gigs as you could. You had audition for a side character in this film but then they told you they were eyeing you for the lead female character. Though you were caught off guard that they needed you to do a chemistry test with Hugh Jackman.

The chemistry test was just the confirmation to Hugh that he should do this movie. He had seen your audition after he'd been at the studio, and he suggested you to the directors. Not because he was attracted to you, it wasn't even something he cared about when he first saw you. Hugh just thought that you were talented, and it would in fact help that you a gentle beauty that wasn't really in Hollywood. You were tall but curvy, the shorts you were highlighted your hips and your ass while clutching to the soft skin of your stomach. So maybe he did the care...Even if you have no real interest in him at least he could be around a woman like you. He got to actually meet you and work with you even if it was just a test read. You were incredibly strong-willed, you acted with so much emotion and when he was looking into your eyes, he definitely felt things while looking into the golden-brown hues of your iris'. Hugh's eyes flitted to the curls that fell out of the clip in your hair.

Then when it came to actually shooting with it, it grew progressively harder to not put himself into this character. To not feel something when he has to stare into your eyes, and the first he had to kiss you? He could tell how nervous you were before filming but when you got into character, looking up at him with wanting eyes. Hugh tried not to stare into your soul and grow feelings for you. But how could he not?

It was intense scene, the two of you had to share a motel room, your sister in the movie was in the hospital. You come into the room with your clothes soaking wet because of the rain, you were crying, the makeup they put on you to make you look more flushed was waterproof. As you started practically sobbing in Hugh's arms, before he convinced you to change your clothes. You had completely came into your character, he could see the change in you, as you cried in his arms. The two of you were upset about what happened to your sister, talking to each other, his hand coming to yours before he kisses you. The kiss is soft, his lips landing on the side of lips but your own puckering to meet his. Then his hand came up to rest right above your heart, touching the skin between your breasts and neck. Hugh softly smiled into the kiss as he felt your heart race, that's when he heard a cut!

"Why are you smiling?" The director questioned, a frown on his face.

"Sorry." Hugh cleared his throat as you looked up at him with a doe eyed gaze. God you were in your 30's, he shouldn't want you the way he wants you right now. About the happiness that fills up in him when he gets to touch you so intimately.

You redo the scene, and Hugh sticks the landing this time. His hand coming up to your jaw as you continued on with scene, your lips moving his. You let out the scripted moan as his tongue dove into your mouth.

Hugh went off script as your breathless look at him, "You're so beautiful." He murmured, his hand coming to brush away your hair.

"I-." You breathed out, before darting forward to connect your lips again. His hand went to the back of your neck, before pausing as the director yelled cut.

"Good job guys." The director yelled.

"Are you doing okay, love?" Hugh checked in, his hand coming to your shoulder in a friendly squeeze before moving away.

"Yeah." You hummed, nodding your head.

"You're being awfully quiet." He said, his chin dipping to look into your eyes.

"Well it's not every day you kiss Hugh Jackman." You laughed, as his started smiling over at you.

"Really now, hmm?" Hugh teased as you blushed, reaching out to hit at his chest, which made him laugh even harder. That's when the intimacy coordinator came up to you and Hugh, the two of you turning towards her. She refreshed the mints in your mouth while she spoke, as she talked over the basics, showing the pasties that go over your breasts and the longer bandages that went over your private parts. Hugh got a sock, because the two of you had to be completely nude for these scenes. He hasn't had do one of these scenes for years, during the sex scenes he stayed respectful as always.

It was normal for actors to get aroused in sex scenes, even if its just a character they are still getting into that mindset. It wasn't like Hugh ever got super turned on but with you? Attraction was normal between costars but having romantic feelings was less so. He was so nervous that it was going to be more than just a little attraction.

Hugh had reason to be concerned to, but because when he saw you naked, he kept his eyes to himself as much as he could. But even with your breasts and genitalia were covered, he tried to think of things that turned him off. Trying to rid himself the embarrassment of getting hard before the scene even started. The two of you finished the make out part of the scene before starting to strip each other's clothes off. Even though it seemed like such a simple thing, the coordinator and director had full control of your movements. His hand settles on the middle of your back as you rise on your knees, reaching his face as met his lips in sloppy kiss.

"Closer." The director spoke, and the two of you moved in closer to each other. Hugh knew it was okay when you start moving forward, so he made it look natural as your hand came to his chest while he pulled you into him.

You felt so flushed you were embarrassed as you felt yourself become wet. Even when his hand came down to fake massage at you, hovering over your core and making the actions with his hand. The way you wanted to connect his fingers with core was so hard to keep at bay. But that's when you felt his hard on accidentally rest against your thigh before he subtly but quickly moved it away from you. "Sorry." he breathed, the quietest whisper before he continued on with his lines for the scene, teasing you and your eyes fluttering shut. Your brain was screaming, 'Please fucking touch me'.

They gave the two of you your breaks, time to drink water, freshen back up, and calm down. Your mind coming back to center, trying not to become animalistic. You nerves about doing the scene were long gone though, Hugh made you feel so comfortable and somewhere deep down your crush fueled off the fact that he was hard. Even though it was just a biological function, you knew it was delusion, but you didn't really care. Then when he was ontop of you, his lips sloppily pressing against yours as he thrusted against the pillow between the two of you. Your hands around his neck, your legs hiked up around his waist. You wanted Hugh to press his hips in harder, to feel the outline of his cock against your core.

This wasn't going to happen again until much later in filming and you knew that it would go just as quick as this did. You wanted to soak up every minute of his attention on you. Even though he was only looking at your character that way. It felt nice to be looked at like you meant something to someone, even if it wasn't real.

Little did you know that Hugh couldn't get his dick to go down, not even when they got back to the hotel that night. He kept his hardened cock tucked into his waistband, avoiding everyone and trying to get back as quick as possible. Though as he was leaving you asked him for a ride, and of course he said yes.

It hadn't been this awkward between the two of you since the first time you met. And it wasn't just because you were starstruck. You were both stuck in your own heads as you thought about the other on top of you doing dirty-dirty things. Hugh would glance over at you and try to think of what to say. But the blood wasn't in his brain helping him fuel his thoughts, all of the blood went straight to his dick.

Hugh's eyes skimming down your body as he naturally looked at your legs covered in shorts, before shaking his head as he looked away. You hummed to the song playing on the radio as you fidgeted with your hands. "Are you sure we're alright, I didn't make you uncomfortable?"

Your head looked over to his so quickly he was surprised you didn't have whiplash. A furrow in your brow as you glared over at him, "Of course not. It was just ya know tiring ready to lay down in bed."

"If only I could show you the real thing." Hugh blurted, his cheeks flaming red as he chuckled, trying to come off as joke. You awkwardly laughed along; your eyes wide as you swallow the lump in your throat, avoiding his gaze. Before looking up at him with a kind smile.

God, he hasn't this way in twenty years. Hasn't been so obsessed with someone, infatuated and cared so much about your opinion and feelings. Hugh had been raised to treat a woman right, he had succeeded in doing that for 27 years, but one day it didn't matter how he treated her. The two had drifted so far apart, the two giving up on a love that was once everything to the both of them. It was now something they wanted to move on from.

When he got back to his hotel room, he hadn't wasted much time in getting comfortable on the red comforter. Taking off his shirt, his pants and his underwear before walking into the bathroom. Hugh turned on the shower, stepping inside and soon grabbing his cock in his hand. He looked down and spit on his shaft before thinking about your hand replacing his, moving up and down his long pulsing cock. The idea of your pretty little eyes looking up at him as you kissed him his cock. Just the thought of the moans you had given him in the scene, imagined the vibrations against his dick. "Fuck, y/n. So fucking beautiful for me." His voice rasped, as he started to fucking himself harder in his hand.

God he wanted you here, he wanted to shove you up against the wall. That's when he heard it, pausing as he heard moans and a buzzing from the other room.

Little did you know that you'd been doing the same thing, your cunt soaked with all the things running through your head. Flashes of his hands on you, the way he moved with you, against you. The taste and feel of his mouth on yours. You had your suctioned rose over your clit, plunging a dildo into your cunt. It was the best way to get yourself off and you knew you needed release after everything that happened.

You imagined Hugh over you, the imagine of him stroking your cunt with his thick fingers, made rip from his throat before panting out his name like a prayer. "Hugh, god fuck." Your voice high-pitched and echoing through the walls.

Hugh moaned at the sound of your voice whispering his name, a flush coming his chest as he beat his dick, bucking up into his hand whenever he heard you moan. Imagining whatever vibrator, you had against your soft little pearl, and he imagined you so wet that you dripped out on to your petals. He wanted to shove his face into your cunt, he didn't want to admit to smelling your arousal. But at one point he had to kiss down your stomach, it wasn't a very long scene. But the potency of your arousal made his cock stir, the fantasy of licking up your core invading his mind. You had to be really fucking wet in order for him to smell your slick.

Hugh felt a flush come over his body as he came into his hand, the deep grunting of your name, rumbled against the thin walls. Making your legs tremble as you came around the toy. The thought of him getting himself off to you driving you over the edge. Hugh turned off the shower once his seed was rinsed off of him. He was quick as he stepped out of the shower, wanting to get to you, way too quick as he slipped. The sound of him groaning loudly but not in a good way heard through the wall. You quickly gathered yourself though you hadn't even have to clean yourself before getting up and running over to check on him.

You knocked on the door, and moments later it opened. Hugh had a hand to his head, and you stepped in, neglecting to bring up the fact that you heard each other getting off to the other respectively. Your hands came up to his face as worry flashed your eyes. "I just slipped out of the shower, I'm fine love." Hugh murmured, as you shoved his hand away to feel over where he wincing.

He grimaced but there was no bump or blood, so you moved your hand away before rubbing at his chest. You felt far more comfortable being intimate with him now. "So you're okay?" he chuckled lightly as he nodded his head. Hugh's hand went to your waist as you'd not move away from him. You licked your lips as you looked down at his.

"I could be better."

"Yeah? How can I do that?"

"I think you know." Hugh grunted, his voice deep yet soothing as he whispered in your ear, his accent thick and making your hands curl against the robe he was wearing. You moved back to look at his chest, as your hands went to the belt wrapped around his waist. You fiddled with the knot as you looked up at his dark eyes.

"I heard you." You whispered, your voice practically trembling in anticipation.

"I know." Hugh replied, his eyes looking down at you with all the emotions he had to conceal earlier in the day. "I've wanted you for so long."

"Really?" Your eyebrows rose as you scanned his eyes light hazel eyes. Hugh pulled you into him as your hands started fiddling with the strings of the robe.

"Since the moment I met you." He confessed, as he stepped closer to you, you slowly kept pulling him along as you started untying the belt. Hugh pressed you up against the door, it moving back as it closed all the way. His hand moved from your waist to lock the door as the robe opened up to reveal his naked body underneath. You couldn't see much, but he looked like a fucking fantasy with the way he was looking at you.

"Me too." You admitted as his lips landed on yours, his hand coming up to cup your cheek. Hugh's lips were alot more firm, excitement raidating through the two of you as you felt his erection. "Already?" You giggled.

"Never got soft again, baby." He husked, before he leant down to grab at your shorts and pull them down. Your hands came to his chest when he met you eye to eye, moving the material away from his chest. Just as Hugh's hands went to your shirt and swiftly pulled it over your head. A smile coming to his lips as you realized you hadn't even put on any panties.

Your eyes flitted down his naked body, your heart racing in your chest. It felt different this time, you felt more in the present as you traced his muscled figure, his toned and large biceps, the way his v-line dips and his cock bobbing as he moved to pick you up. Your legs wrapping around his waist as you pressed your lips against his jaw. "God I want you so bad, Hugh. Please."

"I want you to keep begging like that." Hugh murmured, humor in his voice as his hips rolled against yours. "Do you need any pro-."

"Just fuck me, please c'mon. " Hugh didn't say anything else as he smiled over at you before gripping your hips and sliding his cock inside of you. You let out lewdest moan, your eyebrows pinching together as your eyes closed. Hugh watched every movement, completely enveloped on the pleasure he was already providing for you.

"So fucking wet for me, huh? Still got that little crush on me?" Hugh mocked, as you flushed, hiding your head in his neck as he slowly started rolling his hips against you. Your back flush to the wall, with each thrust you moved up, you felt him so deep inside of you. That's when he picked you up and moved you over to the bed. His hands coming to your thighs and moving them up to your chest. Hugh's cock filled you once again, hitting that spongy spot deep inside of you. The moans let out drove him nuts as he started pounding into you. His leverage on the bed making his thrusts hard and deep. "Gotta use one of those toys next time, hmm? Yeah, fuck."

"Hugh. " You panted, as he grunted into your mouth as he kissed. "So close, fuckin help me, please." Hugh groaned at your sweet yet filthy words, as his fingers came to your clit. Rubbing in tight circles as he focused on the place that made your eyes water. You started trembling, your back arching, your fingers digging into his shoulders as he brought you to your second orgasm of the night. Fourth if you counted the two fake ones in the scene before.

Hugh was already overstimulated, he usually waited a little longer between sessions. But the need to fill you came over him and he knew the two of you didn't need any foreplay. He was determined to make you come again though, holding off his orgasm as he pulled out of you right before coming. Moving your legs back around his waist as he moved over you, his cock penterating you at a different angle. Your tired eyes flutter shut at the feeling of his pulsing cock inside of you. "Please come in me." You pleaded, as Hugh started slowly rolling his hips back into yours.

"So dirty." He murmured into your lips, his hands coming to your legs, using them as leverage at his steady pace. One of his large hands encompassing your large breast, squeezing the flesh before moving down to suck on the skin on top of your breasts. Before moving down to take the nipple into his mouth and suck while trying to find that spot in you again.

When he found it, your hips bucked against his, and he moved up straight to start quickening his pace as he neared the end of his rope. Hugh usually took things slower at first but neither one of you could deny what you wanted any longer. "Gonna make me come inside of this tight pussy."

"Fuck yes." You moaned, as your hand came up to his lips, without needing the stimulation of your clit, you shattered around his cock. You don't usually ever come with his just penetration, only a rare few times you have. But you were already so overstimulated, and his cock was so much thicker and warm than the dildo you played with before. The two of you came together, the feeling of your walls suffocating his cock ripped his orgasm out of him. You felt the spurts of his come inside of you, your walls pulsating at the feeling of being utterly fucked out.

Hugh pulled out of you, flopping on to his back on the bed. His cock now softened against him as he glanced over at you. "Fucking amazing you are." A tired grin came over your lips as his arms wrapped around you and pulled you in close. "If it's alright with you, I'd like to keep you."

"It's more than alright, Hugh."

tags: @jessjessmarvelandhp @chronicallybubbly @delicateholland

[certifries]

based on this bc its hilarious

we all know ruby messed up and bedo now has to deal with it

[deepseawave]

obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog

Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️

Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D

[thoodleoo]

hey so your boyfriend was in these 9 books that a sibyl was offering me and i refused to buy them so she kept burning them up and by the time i finally bought them there were only 3 books left. sorry about that

[theblogof-rassilon]

Hello Rassilon. Apologies for the deception but I rather wanted to make sure you started reading, so I thought it best not to announce myself. I'm assuming you're alone; you always did prefer to read your Asks in private. I wouldn't try too hard to stop reading, there's every likelihood you'll just hurt yourself. So just listen.

Anon ask of Omega (Your Ex) regarding Rassilon's current partners. Ask begins.

I hope you'll forgive me the self-indulgence, but I have worked so very hard for this moment, a culmination of two centuries of work. It's rare that you get the chance to monologue through another, and you can't tell me you're not curious.

Why does an ex seek to talk about their former partner's lovers?

It's a simple enough answer: for satisfying one's curiosity. Uninspired, perhaps, but my god. The discovery, not simply of the variety of partners you take interest in, but that you would quite willingly date the teacher of one of Gallifrey's most infamous children.

It's a strange thing to know about an ex, but the fascination, Rassilon, the fascination of it all. I have dedicated my afterlife to handing myself knowledge of these partners, and I feel nothing but satisfaction in this choice.

I believe there are far more people in this world that would catch your eye than you would ever guess. And I have preceeded all of them.

Of course, their desires did not manifest overnight. When Tumblr first gathered your romantic intereste – Borusa, Banthony, and the rest – to discuss and hypothesize on the nature of their love for you, I felt what I believe we all felt: jealousy, and anger.

But as attention on Tumblr increased in number and discussion on the greatest partner for you emerged, I began to develop a very specific concern. Banthony was so obsessed with his ideas on you and his marriage, even as our fellows began to flirt and confess our love to you ourselves.

I began to worry that if Banthony successfully attempted to catch your gaze, then I would be as much a victim as any, trapped in the nightmare landscape of a twisted world without your love.

At first, I attempted prevention, but the cause seemed hopeless. The only way to ensure I did not suffer the tribulations of what I believed to be an inevitable confession of love was to stop my own feelings of love. So what began as an experiment soon became a race. I would make you fall in love with Banthony before professing your love to anyone else, therefore eliminating what myself or Borusa's feelings may be.

And there, I think, we are brought just about up to date. I have enjoyed our little trip down memory lane, but past here lies only a happy future for you and Banthony.

Goodbye, Rassilon

- Omega xoxo

I- I don't know what to say.

Omega, if this is really you, if you somehow, by every twist and turn of fate imaginable, survived this long in some form... My love for you has always been the greatest of any I have felt. Never have I loved another in the way I loved you.

But that is in the past. I have to stop letting you hold me back. I made my decision that fateful day; I did what I had to do to reach the top, to shape this society- our society, our dream- in the way that it must be shaped. Gallifrey could never have had two rulers. You knew this going in. And, best of all, dearest love, you knew that I would not be able to stand a threat to my power and my control. So, as much as I loved you, Omega, my sweet Ohm, my darling Peylix, I had to let you go. For us, for our home, for our people, for our dream. For Gallifrey. We would both be dead and gone by now if I had not, but now, you live on in your beautous creations, and in our shared society. Look at our children. At what we have created. This must be enough.

Oh, but my darling, you never could be so easily satisfied.

That is why I loved you. And that is why I had to let you go.

If this really were you, I would say, dearest Ohm, that I am glad you are able to let me go. I know that must be exceedingly difficult. But, I am happy with Borusa, and I do not love Banthony. If I did not have Borusa to think of, perhaps things would be different, and I would honour your wishes. Perhaps, then, you may finally find peace.

I am truly sorry that I must leave you trapped in your death, but you will never be in a world without my love. My love for you transcends the grave- and yes, I know, it must be your grave, my darling, for you cannot have survived beyond. I know, in my hearts, that you are gone and that this cannot be from you, not really, for you are lost to all but my memory.

Goodbye, my love. For whatever isn't left of you, for whatever could have been- my love for you persists even now, across regenerations and across death and across time.

[gremlincorner]

i caved

the source image also bc i speedran drawing this very poorly

[townslore]

discovery of the day

[volivolition]

dude the TOP song you posted (truce) fucking kills me and the way you described the animatic is??? so good???? I'd bawl actually /pos

I need to know if there's any other TOP songs you relate to the furies/any DE character really, or any slower songs even if they aren't by TOP

OH AGREED ABSOLUTELY!! TRUCE MY BELOVED... and THANK YOU!! we are imagining animatics and crying together! /pos :'] <3

ooh!! well, i havent listened to a lot of TOP in a while, so i don't have many recommendations there unfortunately :'] but for other slow, soft songs, let's see... i'll put them under a cut with all my explanations, but ☀️ "See The Day" by The Altogether (Volition song!), 🍃 "Rounds" by The Oh Hellos (Shivers song!), 🦋 "Would You Be So Kind" by dodie (general skills song, Suggestion primarily!) are the best contenders!

Pretty sure you've seen it already, but from a different ask, i recommend "Almost (Sweet Music)" by Hozier! (and "Like Real People Do" if you want to cry and yearn with me, though my DE ideas for it are very loose hkjhg) these are slow ones i like hkjhg <3

"Goodbye" by The Altogether is a Harry and Dora song :0

"Soldier, Poet, King" by The Oh Hellos is one i specifically relate to Volition (my beloved protector/motivator/crownhead blorbo! [picks him up and wiggles him!!!]), but i would make one of those animation memes for it with every skill slotted into a "soldier" "poet" or "king" position.

☀️ "See the Day" is both another The Altogether song and another Volition song! a real "the worst is over. we made it through. we're going to survive this. it might not get easier yet, but we'll come out the other side and we'll be alive" song. it makes me cry hkjgh

🍃 "Rounds" by The Oh Hellos is a soft Shivers song, though the lyrics don't start until halfway in. ough my god listening to it makes my heart ache (/pos) <3 La Revacholiere singing to Harry in the wind. "Will you start when I end? Yeah, I'm long in the wind..."

"Northern Star" by Dom Fera, a song Harry would sing for karaoke and dedicate to Kim, and then they'd waltz a little clumsily on the dim, starlit sidewalk on their way home for the evening... <3

🦋 "Would You Be So Kind?" by dodie BUT SPECIFICALLY THIS VERSION, because i love everyone's crowded but earnest vibes. this one is led by Suggestion ("oooh you wanna fall in love with us so bad right? right???") and makes me grin, you GOTTA imagine all of the skills squished together in the front of Harry's brain all trying different tactics to get Kim to fall in love with them, (rhetoric: "I HAVE A QUESTION..." ency: "let's write a story! be in my book!") at 2:35, after all the skills singing together loudly, it's just Harry himself singing to Kim, with all the skills slowly backing him up. the ending is all of them fucking ECSTATIC celebrating when harry finally kisses kim hkjhg jesus this'd be so cute hold on i have to go plan this out i have so many thoughts hkjdh

"Seven" by Sleeping at Last would be a sweet Reaction Speed song (ironic that im adding react speed to a list of soft, slow songs though hkjgh) "I'm ready for whatever comes next!" <3 Reaction Speed is a fast, restless little fella who can't sit still for long, always loves moving, acting, doing. he's like the personification of a verb hkjhg <3 i would also accept an interpretation for echem <3

"Cosmos" by Jawbreaker Reunion is a song that The Furies recently suggested to me as a jean song and it's so right for that, very soft and i like it very much :'] (you should also ask The Furies if you want to, it's much more musically inclined than me, i feel hkjhg <3)

awuahg thank you for asking and for reading!! i appreciate it!! <33

oh and here's links to all of the songs in the tags: Come Together Now, Two, Four, Five, Six, Eight, Nine, RPG Animation Meme (<- homestuck lmao)

[fierrochase-falafel]

Thoughts on Spider-Man: Across the Spiderverse and being different (Pt. 1: Miles Morales)

Just watched Across the Spiderverse and I think regardless of the argument of Gwen being trans or not (and yes, I will get to Gwen), there's something to be said about this movie's handling of the experience of being Spiderman as an allegory for outcasthood (and yes, this includes queerness pretty heavily), especially through the character arc of Miles Morales. This discusses both Spiderverse movies, so do note: SPOILERS ABOUND!

[I will add a quick disclaimer here to say that obviously my opinions only come from what I have learnt from other people or experienced in person. I cannot claim experience for everything I may mention, and even though certain minorities I mention may apply to me, I can't claim to know everyone else's experiences either, so this is just my take. In the end, I'm just some guy saying stuff on Tumblr.]

Spiderman has always been easy to read as a queer allegory because of, y'know: the hiding in plain sight, the lying, the exhaustion, often risk/danger if you're queer in an unsupportive environment, the suffering of not just the Spiderman themself but the people they love / who love them too. In Across the Spiderverse particularly though, carrying on from Into the Spiderverse, I really love the continuation of a really similar problem Miles had in the first movie. In the first movie, Miles was seen as weak and an outcast, even as he joined a new school where he didn't really fit in. He was someone who was not *really* Spiderman until the end where he was finally able to control his powers, proving himself to the other dimension Spider-people. It was a great arc, yet just when Miles thought his fellow Spider-people were on the same level as him, it was revealed to him that he's been the outsider all this time AGAIN. It turns out they were lying to him and the reason Miguel gives to him is that he is an anomaly, that he shouldn't exist. There's something in that which really hurts if you understand the feeling of thinking you're atleast somewhat understood and respected by people you thought you were equal to, only to have the rug pulled out from under you. I mean, I'd say it's a part of my own experience, moving to different schools / environments in different countries and being made fun of for not knowing things without me even realising until afterwards, and I looked like a downright idiot for not knowing things. It's like when everyone picks up on a joke you don't and you're being pulled along on a string like a puppet to entertain the people around you, just when you thought they saw you as one of them.

Even after Miles proves he is smart and can pull off being Spiderman, it's not enough for the majority of Spider-people to respect him, and he has to reckon with the fact that he will never stop being questioned and belittled for who he is. Doesn't that sound familiar? We see it in ethnic minorities being treated like outsiders regardless of where they are from, women being perceived as less smart, neurodiverse people being perceieved as less capable, trans people being seen as too naive to know what they're doing when it comes to transitioning. For Miles, it's finally at this point he lets go of the image of being Spiderman the way the others are- if he won't be accepted as Spiderman because he has not been through supposed 'canon events' and is disrupting them then so be it. As long as he identifies himself as Spiderman, as someone who protects the people as Spiderman, then who the hell is anyone to tell him he isn't! This is the epitome of reclaiming your own identity- his suffering doesn't define him as Spiderman but his passion and will do, and nobody is allowed to dictate to him who he is or how is story is supposed to go. I really love this: I feel especially many minority communities have people who say you can't really be said minority unless you have suffered enough in x ways, or unless you have gone through y things, but this is a really toxic outlook on people's identities and experiences. It's within debates with transmedicalists (I think that's what they're called?) who say people can't be trans unless they have a certain amount of crippling gender dysphoria, or when people say you need to have undergone a certain set of experiences to really be so-and-so nationality or even race. Miles rejects the suffering he (or other Spider-people, for that matter) is supposed to experience as a 'canon event' (from a queer lens, things like being ostracised from your family for your identity come to mind) and also accepts he is an anomaly, ceasing trying to blend in with the rest of the Spider-people as he knows it is pointless to try- without that, all he can rely on is 'doing his own thing', so he goes ahead to do just that.

It's meant to hurt to watch how much Miles wants to see his friends again with hints throughout the film- his A in AP Physics and future ambition to traverse the multiverse, his sketchbook, everything he does to try and not be alone in his experiences- only to find out the others really could have visited him. He wants to speak to the few people who understand his dilemma as Spiderman, and wants to be worthy enough to be one of them until he realises in this film that his own intuition is more valuable than Spider Society could ever be. And even if it hurts to feel like he's alone in this intuition and that everyone thinks he's crazy, it's still more reliable and worthy than the rules anyone else is trying to place over him...

This is my intepretation of the events from my perspective on how the Spiderverse speaks to people who feel different or incompatible with society- while I add nothing to the plot , I think points like mine are really well analysed in terms of the actual Spiderverse by Sage's Rain on Youtube ("Who deserves to be Spider Man?") which I really love seeing and I'd recommend checking out his video!

~ End of Part 1 ~

[candyunicornsateme]

Hello!!

I hope you’re doing okay!

Sometimes I read your posts and see how you long to talk to someone and make friends but maybe scared? I also feel that way very much and wanted to let you know that you’re not alone and I and many others enjoy seeing your headcanons of the k2 boys and yeah :)

Hey ;; thank you that's really reassuring. It can be difficult for me to not think no one'd care about my thoughts, even if it's about what most people probably freakin follow me for ??? Yanno?? So it means a lot ;-; Pls always feel free to pick my brain about stuff!!

[the-girl-who-didnt-smile]

“BIG PAPA” LEGBA

The man, the myth, the legend.

This is the leader of the Loa, who as I mentioned before are just the gods of Hazbin Hotel. Their leader is really fucking strong.

“Big Papa” is my favorite because all of the Loa are complete bullshit, but he’s the most bullshit of them all. 

I think I cooked up something really special with him. I cannot wait to share him with the world.

This man is called “Big Papa” Legba. Everything about this man is completely outrageous.

He is completely batshit insane.

This is how I envision this man gets introduced into Hazbin Hotel:

So you just hear this rumor that there exists a man in Hazbin Hotel who is so fucking strong that he can rip apart the entire universe with his bare hands. And you think he’s going to be this really scary guy. You think he is going to be really serious and that he is going to look completely terrifying, but no.

The most powerful man in all of Hazbin Hotel is just a jazzman from the Harlem Renaissance. 

He’s the jazziest jazzman to ever jazz.

He just fucking waltzes in, he makes a microphone materialize out of nowhere and he just starts fucking singing. 

This happens in a context when it is completely inappropriate for Black Santa Claus to break out into song. He does not care. He’s also got the craziest pipes ever. 

He’s literally got the best voice out of anyone in Hazbin Hotel, which is fucking insane because the cast of Hazbin is so packed when it comes to vocals.

This man can sing. He can dance, and he can play every musical instrument.

He introduces himself with a musical number. His musical number is called “You Can Call Me ‘BIG’ Papa!”

It’s a jazz number. 

This has to be one of the best tracks out of any season of Hazbin Hotel. It has to be the catchiest jazz number ever. 

It’s just a tribute to the Harlem Renaissance, and Alastor’s little musical number in the pilot. He brings that level of mania, dialed up to eleven. Dialed up to a thousand.

I tried to pour all of my mania into this guy, and I can be a little manic at times.

“Big Papa” Legba is just a walking tribute to the Harlem Renaissance and bullshit anime superpowers, especially One Piece. He’s basically everything I love, condensed into one man. 

This guy is so much fun.

He wears a bright red zoot. He carries a magic gold staff with a huge coil in. He can turn the staff into a gorgeous snake that he wraps around his body and he can turn it into any musical instrument. He smokes a pipe, which he can turn into saxophone and other silly things. He can just turn someone a little violin and start playing. He does all of these things during his little musical number. 

The recurring verse in his song “You Can Call Me BIG-” and when he says the word “Papa!”, he slams his magic staff into the ground. Magic gold sparks fly everywhere, and the word “BOOM” appears in pitch black behind him, filling up the entire screen. But that’s not just the word “BOOM”. What he did just there is he tore a hole in the universe in the shape of the word “BOOM”, and then he closed it. Because he can fucking do that. 

This how strong this guy is. He is the man that is powerful enough to rip apart the entire universe with his bare hands, and he loves doing it too. He rips holes in the universe all the goddamn time.

The way this man moves, walks, and talks, you get the sense that he is enormously powerful. You are correct. Everywhere he walks, magic gold sparks are flying off of him, and he sounds like thunder when he walks and talks. He is the magic man in a bright red zoot. This man is just overflowing with golden magic and charisma. His physical form can barely contain his massive reserves of pure magic.

He loves using his powers to do all sorts of crazy shit. He takes off his head and starts juggling it. He makes his arms and legs fly off like Buggy D. Clown. It goes without saying that he can do everything that Alastor can do, but can do way more than that. He has every busted Devil Fruit power, and it’s not like he can’t swim. He uses his voodoo magic to force people to listen to jazz, because he fucking loves jazz, and he forces you to start dancing to it to. 

At one point, he changes the entire art style of the show.

Also, he loves using his powers to do little quirky, mischievous things. One of the little quirky things he does with his powers is dog-taming. He can tame any dog, no matter how vicious it is, and turn it against its master. Dogs are his favorite animal. He’s got little bones in his hat, not because he has death-related powers, but because he just fucking loves dogs and they fucking love him back too. He uses his powers to make bones materialize out of nowhere so he can give them to dogs. He likes to transform the orb at the top of his staff into a bulldog head. He loves to transform himself into a bulldog too. 

On the subject of his staff, he also likes to transform the magic gold orb into a sun. He normally does this when he's about to do something NUTS with his powers, or just for a bit of visual flair.

He likes to shapeshift with his powers, and he likes to transform other people too. Another quirky thing he does is he reverts humans, sinners, and angels back into what they looked like as children during their lives as humans. This has the effect of disarming that person, but also because he’s really good with kids. He probably doesn’t need to disarm you anyways, because he’s probably way the fuck more powerful than you.

He is just a very mischievous, jazzy man.

This man always has a shit-eating grin, but it’s like a really infectious shit-eating grin. The way he smiles, you look at him, and you kind of want to start smiling too. Unlike Alastor, he only ever smiles when he’s actually happy. He’s just happy almost all of the time. He’s just a jolly old man who fucking loves jazz, and he’s here to have a good time.

He’s also just about the most powerful thing that ever existed and ever will exist.

So you might be looking at this guy and wondering “Why is he a One Piece character?” Because, in Voodoo mythology, Papa Legba (as in, the actual deity) is like this mischievous old man who wears a straw hat. He smokes a pipe and he loves dogs. He assumes the form of an old man so you think he’s more feeble than he actually, but he’s actually like the most powerful and most important deity in all of voodoo. He’s a little devious in this regard. That is why “Big Papa” Legba (as in, my attempt to turn this deity into a batshit insane anime character) is just Monkey D. Garp with the most insane voodoo magic you have ever seen in your entire goddamn life.

You cannot convince me that “Big Papa” Legba would not make the greatest addition to the cast of Hazbin Hotel.

“BIG PAPA” IN MY DERANGED FANFICTION

So in my deranged fanfiction, “Big Papa” is 100% the most important OC I have introduced here, because he’s Alastor’s surrogate father figure. He popped into Alastor’s life when he was like twelve years old and filled the void left following the deaths of both of his parents. He fucking loved Alastor’s mom. He taught Alastor everything he knows about voodoo magic. He’s the reason Alastor is as insane as he is. It’s this fucking guy.

Alastor fascinates “Big Papa” because Alastor’s entire existence is extremely improbable. In my fanfiction, Alastor is not just this mixed race Creole dude, he is also FTM trans and the child of the most evil guy and the most virtuous woman ever. He stands at the very crossroads of Black and White, Male and Female, and most importantly: Good and Evil. “Big Papa” is like this ancient, immortal god who has existed for millennia. Human lives are like these little specks flash by him in the time it takes for him to blink. In the time it takes for him to blink, Alastor is just going to be dead, and he will have missed this once-in-a-lifetime chance to study the person who stood at the very crossroads of Race, Gender, and Morality.

Also, as I mentioned, he fucking loved Alastor’s mom. Alastor’s mom was like the most virtuous and pious woman ever. She built up an enormous fortune of goodwill with these uber-powerful beings. These guys who are literally just the gods of Hazbin Hotel. They all loved her, and her dying wish was for them to protect her child. So now the most powerful god of them all is just like following Alastor around and keeping an eye on him and shit. Alastor probably would have died as a teenager if “Big Papa” didn’t have his back.

“Big Papa” thinks that just by tracking Alastor, he can learn about humanity itself. He sees Alastor as a such a improbability that he stands at the very crossroads of existence. For “Big Papa” is the god of the spiritual Crossroads, and he is a very curious god. There is no other god more captured by the existence of human lives than he.

Anyways, the best part about “Big Papa” Legba is his powers, which is what I really want to talk about. They are the most outrageous thing about this very outrageous man.

“BIG PAPA” LEGBA’S POWERS

“Big Papa” Legba’s power level is just completely fucking insane. 

In Voodoo, Papa Legba (the actual deity) is called “The Doorkeeper” and he is the deity of spiritual crossroads. This is my attempt to translate these attributes into completely insane, bullshit anime superpowers.

“Big Papa” Legba wields the powers of Dimensional Manipulation, and “Crossroads”. These are both really good powers. 

Both of these powers are completely fucking broken.

This is what it is like trying to fight this guy:

So he starts the battle by just expanding to whatever size he needs to be. He can just instantly become whatever size he needs to be, but if he is not in danger, he likes to take his time doing this. He is probably going to start dancing and singing while doing this too. Once he’s the size he needs to be, he drills his magic staff into the ground and a huge, pitch black void forms underneath him.

It is important to note that his staff does not need to make contact with the ground for this attack to activate. He’s just picking a point in space-time and choosing to make that the center of his attack.

If you fall into this void, you’re super dead.

So you’re thinking “I’ll just stay out of this void”, but this void has an insane gravitational pull. It’s basically a black hole. 

Even if you can somehow resist the enormous force behind this gravitational pull, “Big Papa” can just teleport next to you and throw you into this void. He can just turn his arm into a rubber hose and throw you in. There are a million different goofy ways this man can force you into this void. And once you’re in, you just die.

This void looks completely pitch black, unless you are standing directly above. Then you can see what is actually happening.

“Big Papa” is just collapsing all three dimensional objects that enter this void into two dimensional space. It’s just “the paper” from the Remembrance of Earth’s Past trilogy. It's actually a stronger version of the paper, because he can literally make it any size he wants and there's no spaceship fast enough to save an ORDINARY HUMAN from this attack! This is a near instantaneous attack! This is his weakest and slowest attack. He always opens with this because just wants to see who can survive his weakest slowest attack, and he loves toying with his opponents.

So you’re thinking to yourself, “I’m a shapeshifter. I’m just going to shapeshift into a two-dimensional object so Papa’s dimensional attack doesn’t kill me.” First of all, you probably cannot shapeshift fast enough to dodge this. Moreover, Papa selects three properties when he uses this attack: a center, a radius, and an angle. The angle is not fixed to the angle his staff makes with the center point of this attack. If you are not perfectly aligned to the angle of this two-dimensional plane he creates, he does not gently rotate you into the correct orientation. You get ripped by this one! The odds that you correctly guess the angle he selects is basically zero (his Battle IQ is REALLY high!!!) This is a really strong attack he’s opening with.

If you can somehow survive getting all your three dimensional matter UNRAVELED and CRUSHED into two dimensional space, now he goes in the opposite direction and explodes your ass into four dimensional confetti. 

You might be wondering what it means to get exploded into four dimensional confetti. So you know how a piece of paper is basically a two dimensional object. If you grab the top of the paper and pull it along the z-axis in one direction, while grabbing the bottom and pulling it in the opposite z-axis direction, you rip that paper in half. That’s what he’s doing to your ass, but in four dimensions. This attack rips every three dimensional object to pieces.

This is a pretty good power.

“Big Papa” can do this because he’s the Doorkeeper of the Dimensions. 

He can also crush you down into one dimensional space or explode you into higher dimensions. But his favorites are turning you into a pretty two dimensional picture, or four dimensional confetti. This man will literally just instant transmission to an uninhabited solar system, unravel and collapse all of its three dimensional matter into two dimensional space, then shrink that down like a PNG to make his next jazz album cover. He can turn the entire galaxy into four dimensional confetti and put that in his next music video.

If you are one of the few who is completely immune to dimensional attacks, then he uses his next power. This power is called “Crossroads”. “Crossroads” is when “Big Papa” claps his hands and shouts the word “CROSSROADS!!” This attack splits all of your atoms apart because it sends all your protons flying in one direction and all your neutrons flying in the opposite direction. “Big Papa” does not have to shout “CROSSROADS!!” to use the attack “Crossroads”, he just likes doing that. This attack activates once his palms make contact with each other. While he does have to clap his hand to activate this attack, as you can imagine this man can clap his hands very fast.

This is a really fast attack. The center of this attack is the point where his palms make contact with each other, and if it was not obvious, this is a spherical attack (in three dimensional space). He picks the center and radius of this attack and it activates almost instantaneously.

In theory, it is possible to dodge the attack “Crossroads”, but you cannot dodge it by stepping to the side. The only way to dodge this is to back up really fast, or to just teleport. But you probably cannot teleport fast enough to dodge this.

If you somehow manage to dodge this, “Big Papa” just keeps spamming “Crossroads” until it hits you. The probability that you dodge three rounds of “Crossroads” is basically zero. He can just instant transmission to wherever he needs to be to kill your ass with this attack.

If anyone is still alive after Papa’s void attack and three rounds of “Crossroads”, “Big Papa” just turns them into party balloons. He jump ropes with them a little bit, and then goes back to doing whatever he was doing before.

This man is a whole ass problem.

You can send armies full of millions of super-powered men at this guy, and they’re all dead in less than two minutes. And most of that time was just Papa expanding at the very beginning. You can form an army out of every canon character in the Hazbin Hotel universe and he no-diffs this army in less than thirty seconds. I don’t even think he needs to use “Crossroads” to kill all of them. I think they’re all dead after his first dimensional attack.

“BIG PAPA” GETS SERIOUS

Let’s say you can survive Papa’s void, three rounds of “Crossroads”, and getting turned into party balloons, because you are also a god. If you are also unimaginably strong and going to battle with “Big Papa”, then he gets serious.

The real fight begins.

“Big Papa” starts using all sorts of insane dimensional manipulation powers. He does not just wield the power of dimensional manipulation, he is the master of dimensional manipulation. He has completely optimized this power for maximum destruction.

This is like trying to fight a loony toon, but the loony toon is also manipulating the dimensions all around you to move your ass around too. It is basically impossible to land a hit on “Big Papa” when he gets serious. Also he’s just constantly firing “Crossroads” at you while he is doing this.

“Big Papa” can use “Crossroads” in all sorts of creative ways. For you see “Crossroads” is not restricted to splitting protons from neutrons. “Crossroads” is a really powerful magic attack where you target two parts of an object and split them apart from each other. “Big Papa” just defaults “protons” and “neutrons” because this completely obliterates pretty much everything in three dimensional space. But he can modify this attack to work in any dimensional space, and he can change the target to whatever he imagines. The only limit to what you can target with “Crossroads” is your imagination. As you can imagine, “Big Papa” is a very imaginative man. If he is fighting an ethereal, five-dimensional being that is not made out of “protons” and “neutrons”, he can still split its “arms” from its “legs”. He can destroy pretty much anything with this power.

Fighting “Big Papa” means the destruction of the known universe. He just starts tearing holes all over the universe and doesn’t bother to close them back up. You are probably going to destroy most or all of the known multiverse if you do battle with “Big Papa” Legba.

This guy is like Sun God Nika, but I think he’s actually stronger than Sun God Nika. I think he’s actually a lot stronger than Sun God Nika.

He can make himself even stronger too.

This is what “Big Papa” does when he just wants to end the fight. He stops grinning, he closes his right eye and opens left eye really wide. His left eye forms a perfect circle, and you just see this very tight gold spiral form in the center of his pupil. For you see “Big Papa” is not actually jazzman from the Harlem Renaissance in a bright red zoot. This is just the preferred avatar he assumes in three-dimensional space. 

“Big Papa” is actually a near-infinite reserve of extremely powerful magic that exists across every dimensional space in existence. He is the Doorkeeper of the Dimensions - and I mean all dimensions, including imaginary dimensions! The gold in the center of his pupil is his magic. When he opens his eye really wide like that, he is concentrating an enormous amount of his ultra-powerful magic into the one-dimensional point at the very center of his pupil. So his body goes completely stiff and still because he is no longer wasting any of his magic to manipulate his three-dimensional avatar. 

When he does this, “Crossroads” no longer has any limits to it. It just targets “everything” within an object and splits it apart. “Crossroads” is the power to destroy anything within a given dimensional space. “The Doorkeeper of the Dimensions” can also travel between dimensions and rip apart the fabric of any given dimensional space. For you see, “Big Papa” Legba is actually the god of Dimensional Destruction itself.

The best part is that his powers just look so fucking goofy no matter how serious he gets. It’s literally just Black Santa Claus in a bright red zoot. He’s no longer smiling, but he’s winking at you. He can instant transmission anywhere and grow or shrink to whatever size he needs to be. He can kill pretty much anything that ever existed and ever will exist, and I don’t think there is anything that can kill this guy. 

“Big Papa” Legba was just designed to be the most broken anime character of all time. He is so goddamn strong. He is, without exaggeration, the most powerful of the gods. It is almost inconceivable how fucking strong this man is. I think he might be the strongest man in all of fiction.

The only thing more powerful than this man is God. He is the Voodoo King from New Orleans, and he’s got power beyond your wildest dreams. 

He can pretty much do whatever the fuck he wants.

[kikyoupdates]

Girlfriend-For-Hire ⭑˚🦋⭑ 𝟶𝟷

yandere!ocs x f!reader

yandere, reverse harem, yandere reverse harem, original characters x fem!reader, slowburn, slowburn yandere

Hoping to try something new and earn a bit of money on the side, you join an app that lets people hire you for your dating services. The idea is pretty straightforward — you pose as the client's girlfriend for a brief period of time, and in turn, you receive payment. But you didn't foresee everyone getting so attached to you, and suddenly, they're no longer satisfied with a fabricated relationship.

story masterlist | next

“...you can do what now?”

“Hire someone to date you,” your friend, Ava, repeats. She chuckles and waves you off dismissively. “Come on, [Name]. It’s the modern age. People are always coming up with new things these days. I’m willing to bet there’s an app or website out there for practically anything.”

You blink in disbelief. Granted, there is all kinds of crazy shit going on in the world, and you’ve heard of companionship services before—like escorts or sugar baby arrangements—but to hear that something like this is trending nowadays is still undeniably a shock. 

“Here, look,” Ava gestures, pulling out her phone. “I was curious, so I downloaded the app the other day just to check out.” 

“Uh, don’t you already have a boyfriend?”

“He knows I was just browsing. I showed him too, and we scrolled through some stuff together. A lot of the profiles on here are wild,” she laughs. “It’s crazy what people advertise they’re willing to do. Get a load of this guy. He says he’s down to meet your family and make a total ass out of himself just so that he lowers your parents’ standards and the next real boyfriend you get will look way better by comparison.”

“Fucking hell,” you mutter. “I can’t tell if this is actually real, or just some new meme template.” 

“Of course it’s real! I think you’re underestimating how lonely people these days are. There’s definitely a lot of money to be made in this industry. Just look at how much people are willing to blow on their favorite streamer, even though they’ve never met them a day in their life. Dating’s gotten a lot more complicated lately, so I guess some people just want to skip past the troublesome parts and experience what it’s like to be with someone.” 

You furrow your brows. The whole thing sounds incredibly sad when you think of it that way. People would rather pay for a fabricated relationship than put in the time and effort towards building something real? Loneliness is starting to sound like an actual epidemic nowadays. 

“Well, I guess I shouldn’t judge people without understanding where they’re coming from,” you acknowledge. “It’s not like I know what they’ve been through. Times are changing and all. It sounds like this is actually starting to become pretty mainstream.” 

Ava nods chipperly. “Yep! I mean, I love my boyfriend, so I’m definitely not the target audience, but maybe it’s what some people need to gain a little boost of confidence and get back into the dating scene. I doubt everyone uses it in a romantic sense too. There are people out there that just want a bit of company every now and then. Isn’t it nice that they have someone to spend time with this way?” 

“Yeah… I guess that’s true.” 

Honestly, you’re still struggling to fully wrap your head around this. You understand the premise well enough, but you can’t really get past the part about accepting payment just to provide someone with a fabricated experience. Then again, you suppose that’s the case for most things nowadays. People are willing to spend the brunt of their earnings on in-game purchases for video games and other things that aren’t tangible in the real world, because even though they aren’t necessarily organic, it still provides them with some satisfaction. 

Long story short, it’s not up to you to decide what does or doesn’t make someone else happy, and you suppose as long as it’s executed in a professional manner, there’s nothing wrong with meeting new people this way. 

“Hey, I’ve got a great idea,” Ava suddenly perks up. “You should join this app! You’re super pretty, smart, and nice. I bet you’d have loads of guys lining up to hire you as their girlfriend!”

“Me?” You blink repeatedly, shuffling backwards the closer she leans in. “I mean, I just don’t think I’m the right person for the job. If it makes people happy, then I support it, but deep down, I worry I’d feel like I’m exploiting someone’s feelings just for a few extra bucks. Morally speaking, I’m not so sure I like the idea…” 

“It’s not exploitation,” she insists. “People know what they’re signing up for. At the end of the day, it’s a buyer-seller relationship. Someone pays for the service being advertised, and they receive it. As long as you’re not ambiguous about what you’re willing to do for the amount that you’re charging, people know what to expect. Of course, I’m sure there might be the occasional asshole here and there, but if they do anything inappropriate or violate the terms, you can report them through the app and they’ll be banned from using it.” 

You’re not quite sure how to respond to that. Some extra money would be nice. You’re a university student with all sorts of loans, so it’s not like you’ve got excess cash lying around. And it’s also true that you’ve been looking to apply for a new job lately, since your old manager was a total ass and you ended up quitting. 

Still. A girlfriend-for-hire? Someone like you? It’s just really difficult to imagine. 

“I actually think it’d be a good experience,” Ava goes on. “You’ve never really put yourself out there before. I know everyone dates at their own pace and stuff, but you shouldn’t have to be afraid. Who knows? Maybe you’ll meet some cool people and want to date them for real. And even if you don’t end up going for them, you still make some money, so either way, you’ve got nothing to lose.”

You chuckle weakly. “Yeah, I just don’t know. I feel like I’m better suited for traditional jobs. But thanks for the vote of confidence. I’m glad you think people would actually be willing to pay to date me.” 

“Girl, you seriously need to believe in yourself more,” Ava sighs. “I’m telling you, you’re a catch. But at the end of the day, it’s your call. You shouldn’t force yourself into anything if you feel uncomfortable.”

You smile and nod in agreement, and sensing your discomfort, Ava decides to change the topic.

But for some reason, you feel a twinge in your chest, and it’s hard to keep your mind from wandering.

Later that same day, you’re lounging on the couch, mouth agape, having just downloaded the app on your own phone. 

“What the hell am I doing…?” 

You tell yourself that it’s just simple curiosity. Yeah. That’s all it is. Ava piqued your interest earlier, and now you just want to scroll through in more detail to get a better sense of what kind of people use this platform. 

The app is called ‘Partner For Hire’. The name isn’t particularly inspired, you have to admit, but you suppose it communicates its point rather effectively and leaves no room for ambiguity. Ultimately, this is a transactional relationship, and it’s probably for the best that clients know what to expect. 

You can use the app as either a buyer or seller. Meaning that you can create your profile and advertise your services, or simply list yourself as a prospective client and what your hobbies and interests are. In that sense, it’s kind of similar to most dating apps, since you have to take a flattering photo to go along with whatever blurb you’re providing. Of course, just because you try to solicit someone’s services doesn’t mean there’s any guarantee they’ll accept. This is an app where you can run everything yourself, and of course the company takes a cut of your profits, rather than an agency that matches you with a client regardless of whether you want to accept the job or not. 

There’s definitely a lot of flexibility, and you can easily choose who you want to pretend to date. If someone is interested in hiring you, they submit a request to be able to contact you, and once you accept, you can message them directly and establish the terms of the dating contract, such as the length and what particular services will be provided. 

You scroll through the list of boyfriends/girlfriends being advertised on the app, and honestly, it seems like there’s a decent amount of money to be made. Of course, a lot of that comes with building a good reputation and improving your ratings and visibility so more people will want to hire you, but it actually seems like a decent amount of people are able to make a living off this sort of thing. 

You bite down on your lower lip. Should you really go ahead and just do it? Like Ava said, there’s probably not much to lose. All the transactions are managed on the app, so you can easily report people who try to skip out on paying. Clients have to link their banking and personal info, so they’d be taking on a big risk by trying to scam people. You’re sure it might happen from time to time, but based on the reviews you’ve read, the company is really good at enforcing their policies and making sure everyone gets paid.

The money seems good, and it would definitely help take some pressure off your student loans, but ultimately, the biggest thing you’re struggling with is your moral compass.

People are willing to spend money for this kind of thing, and that’s entirely their choice to make, so it’s not like you’re extorting them or anything. Still… you wonder if it’s actually okay to profit off of someone else’s loneliness. You’ve never worked the kind of job that requires you to cater directly to another person’s emotions, and it kind of freaks you out.

But maybe Ava is right. There are all sorts of people in this world. Maybe some of them are just curious to try the app out. Maybe others just want to get their families off their back by pretending like they’re dating someone for a little while. There’s no way to discern everyone’s motivations, so perhaps there’s really no point in thinking about it at all. 

Most importantly, this could be a good thing for you. Life has been stagnant recently, and it’s true that you usually hesitate to put yourself out there. You’ll never learn what you do or don’t like if you keep on avoiding everything. This could be a chance to learn a lot about other people, but also, to learn more about yourself. 

Yeah. It’s time to stop overthinking for a change and just try something new. 

Thus, feeling unusually determined, you spend the rest of the day setting up your profile (finding nice selfies was the longest part of the whole ordeal), and with a resolved huff, you post it and officially go live on the app. 

You’re not really sure what you were expecting, but needless to say, there isn’t any immediate feedback. It probably takes a while for people to stumble across your profile, and even then, there’s no guarantee they’ll want to go out with you. 

I guess I was getting worked up for no reason. Certain people might find success with this kind of thing, but it’s probably not as easy as it looks. 

You scratch your cheek, suddenly sheepish over how needlessly excited you got earlier. You’re not used to stepping out of your comfort zone, so you must have gotten a bit carried away. 

For the rest of the evening, you set your phone aside and come back to reality. You get some homework done, make dinner, and by the time you’re ready for bed, you’ve pretty much forgotten about the whole thing altogether. 

That is, until you check and see that you’ve missed a notification.

“Huh? Someone viewed my profile and wants to message me?”

You’re undeniably taken aback. Not just because it’s happening a lot sooner than you expected, but also because it means that contrary to what you first thought, people are interested in you. 

Having minimal experience when it comes to dating and romance in general, you have to admit, the thought of being viewed as desirable is immensely flattering. 

Curious to see who wants to hire your services, you click on the user’s profile.

His name is Isaac, and he’s twenty-one years old, set to complete his undergraduate studies at the end of the year. He goes to a different university than yours, thankfully, because you can’t help but feel like it would be incredibly awkward to bump into him on campus after pretending to be his girlfriend. He’s studying to become a doctor, which means he’s still got a lot of school ahead of him, but you’ve always had a lot of admiration for people who are willing to commit to their goals and work hard. 

Also, even though you don’t want to sound shallow or anything… he’s really, really attractive. 

You frown. Granted, there’s more to a person than their appearance, but based on how he comes across in his profile and what his future career is, he doesn’t strike you as the type of person who would struggle to date someone.

But again, you can never know what’s going on in a stranger’s life. And there’s no real way to find out why he decided to join the app.

Apart from speaking to him directly, of course. 

[𝐃𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐭𝐨 𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐫’𝐬 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬?]

>>[𝐘𝐄𝐒]

After a momentary delay, the screen loads into a messaging interface, allowing you to see what Isaac sent you and respond to him directly.  

You stare at the messages without blinking, just taking it all in. So, there really are people like him out there, who use these apps for reasons other than seeking companionship. It sounds like he’s not too interested in dating for real, but his parents are putting a lot of pressure on him, so he just wants an escape. Honestly, you can’t blame him for it. Your parents were overbearing for the better portion of your life—even now, as an adult—so you can understand just how suffocating it gets at times.

All of a sudden, you don’t feel too bad about accepting the job. It doesn’t feel like exploitation in the slightest. In fact, you’d be helping someone resolve a frustration situation, while getting paid in the process. It actually sounds like it could be rather fulfilling. 

More importantly, you decided to be more confident and try something new. You refuse to back out now. 

You stare at the messages without blinking, just taking it all in. So, there really are people like him out there, who use these apps for reasons other than seeking companionship. It sounds like he’s not too interested in dating for real, but his parents are putting a lot of pressure on him, so he just wants an escape. Honestly, you can’t blame him for it. Your parents were overbearing for the better portion of your life—even now, as an adult—so you can understand just how suffocating it gets at times. 

All of a sudden, you don’t feel too bad about accepting the job. It doesn’t feel like exploitation in the slightest. In fact, you’d be helping someone resolve a frustration situation, while getting paid in the process. It actually sounds like it could be rather fulfilling. 

More importantly, you decided to be more confident and try something new. You refuse to back out now. 

[𝐍𝐚𝐦𝐞]:

You’re admittedly a bit nervous, especially since you want to do a good job and avoid letting him down, but mostly, you’re feeling excited. All of this is uncharted territory for you, after all. Never in a million years would you have imagined taking on a job like this. 

And you really shouldn’t have.

You don’t know it yet, but this will be the cause of many, many regrets. 

Shit. I’m starting to have second thoughts. 

Even now, you still can’t believe you’re really going through with this. After talking to Isaac and ironing out the finer details, you agreed to join him for a family gathering and pose as his girlfriend. You expected for him to have quite a few requests, but luckily, he seems pretty laid back about the whole thing. The better portion of your conversation was spent on getting your stories straight so as not to incur any suspicion, and since you’ve always been a good student and a hard worker, you promptly memorized everything there was to know. 

And now, it’s finally time to put this plan in motion. 

“Hey,” Isaac greets. “[Name], right?”

It’s the evening, since his parents are hosting a dinner party. The event is supposed to be pretty casual, but you still dressed up semi-formal in the hopes of making a good impression. He never explicitly mentioned how strict his parents are, but since they’ve been on his case about getting a girlfriend, it never hurts to go the extra mile. 

"Hi, Isaac,” you smile. “It’s so nice to meet you.” 

“You, too,” he nods. He’s considerably taller than you, and every bit as handsome as his picture suggested. Unless his personality is god-awful (which you probably would’ve picked up on after messaging him for so long), you’ve got a good feeling that most girls would be interested in him.

Still, everyone is different. He might have really high standards, or maybe he wants to focus on his studies, or perhaps it’s just a case of having never met the right person. Whatever the reason may be, his parents shouldn’t be pressuring him to date someone, and if you have the means to help him out, you’ll happily do it. 

“You look really nice,” Isaac says. He tilts his head to the side. “I hope you didn’t feel like you had to dress up to impress anyone. The most important part is that they believe I’m seeing someone so that they finally ease up a bit.” 

“Oh, I just did this for my own peace of mind,” you reassure. “I made sure to memorize everything you told me in advance, so I’m confident I can convince them that we’re the real deal. Even though this is technically my first day on the job… I promise not to let you down.” 

You blush, feeling rather flustered. The idea of being someone’s hired girlfriend is still a lot to wrap your head around, and you certainly don’t want to make empty promises, but you have every intention of giving it your best shot. Isaac is in a stressful situation, and you’re resolved to do whatever you can to fix it. 

“Can’t wait to get this over with,” Isaac sighs. He opens the passenger door and gestures for you to step inside the car. “Don’t worry. I know you might be feeling a bit uneasy, but I promise I’m not a serial killer or anything like that. I won’t hold it against you if you have 911 ready on speed dial until we get to my parents’ house.” 

“I trust you,” you insist. “I’ve heard good things about this app, and it sounds like they take safety seriously. They’ve got your information in their system, after all. Plus, I can tell that you’re a nice guy. It’s just a gut feeling.”

“I appreciate it,” he smiles. “Anyways… I guess I’ve stalled for long enough. You can probably tell that I really don’t feel like going. But the sooner I get them off my back, the better.” 

“I’ll be the best girlfriend you can ask for,” you beam. 

It’s a promise to him, but also to yourself. You are committed to taking this new job seriously, and for the rest of the evening, you will do whatever it takes to blend into the role that’s been thrust upon you. There’s no reason to get worked up. At the end of the day, all of this is pretend. It won’t be anywhere near as complicated as a real relationship.

Right?

story masterlist | next

Enjoying the story so far? More chapters are available on Quotev!

⊱.⋅follow + post notifications on for story update announcements or join the author's discord!⋅.⊰

🦋 main masterlist ♡ character appearances

[fastandcarlos]

Mixing Work And Pleasure : ̗̀➛ Carlos Sainz

summary: you’re sure as you start at ferrari you’re going to be the ultimate professional, but is it really so bad if you mix work and pleasure?

pairing: carlos x verstappen!reader

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by scuderiaferrari, charles_leclerc and 26,948 others

ynverstappen: first day on the new job, I think I might just like it around here ❤️🏎️

3,859 comments

username1: congratulations yn, this is such an exciting step for you!!

maxverstappen1: couldn’t be prouder of you little one, if anyone bothers you, send them big brother’s way 😂

carlossainz55: we’re so excited to have you with us making the best content in the world 🥺

username2: let’s be honest, she only got the job cause she’s max’s sister

danielricciardo: does this mean you’re in the paddock every week now so I can always come and annoy you!?

ynusername: @/danielricciardo I’m a professional now btw 🙃

charles_leclerc: can’t wait to get started and see what you’ve got in store for us!!

username3: the way she already has charles and carlos smiling after one day makes me think this is gonna be amazing

landonorris: fighting through the tears knowing you picked them over me 😭

ynusername: @/landonorris send your complaints to your boss who assured me you didn’t need any new media managers!!

username4: our favourite sibling is gonna be in the paddock every week from now on 🎉

username5: there is no one more deserving of this, you’re a genius with ideas for content!!

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by landonorris, danielricciardo and 1,392,058 others

carlossainz55: the perfect weekend doing all of my favourite things 💞

90,473 comments

username6: not carlos just suddenly springing a relationship on us like it’s nothing 🙂‍↔️

charles_leclerc: hope you guys enjoyed the recommendation I gave you ☺️

carlossainz55: @/charles_leclerc to please your ego I’ll give you full credit for the fact I’ve got a second date!

username7: forget the golf, forget the driving, I wanna know all about the dinner!!

maxverstappen1: isn’t it about time you started doing a different sport, one that’s at least a little bit exciting??

carlossainz55: @/maxverstappen1 I would suggest padel but that’s only exciting for me constantly beating you

username8: he only said a few weeks ago in an interview that he wanted to stay single for a while 😂

landonorris: the only reason the golf is on there is because you beat me!!

username9: there’s no way he’s gonna be able to hide this for too long, the paps follow him everywhere

alex_albon: holding the hands of random strangers is restaurant should not be your favourite thing to do 😂

username10: is this the sort of content the new manager has approved of???

username11: my heart was not prepared for this sudden post to let me know my chances with carlos are over 😭

danielricciardo: looks like someone has some serious explaining to do…

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by oscarpiastri, alex_albon and 1,103,694 others

carlossainz55: this new social media manager has me doing all sorts of weird things, apparently fans like photos of me like this…I’m yet to be convinced 😂

103,684 comments

username12: fyi we absolutely love photos like these 😂

landonorris: I nearly fell off my chair laughing after scrolling through this post 😂😂😂

username13: thank you yn for convincing carlos to bless us with a world of meme worthy content

maxverstappen1: enjoy an insight into what I’ve had to deal with for the past 20 years 🙄

carlossainz55: @/maxverstappen1 I’m honestly wondering how you’ve survived this for so long 🤭

username14: he has no idea how much we love seeing this side of him does he???

ynverstappen: I didn’t exactly hear you arguing when I suggested you posting these 🤨

carlossainz55: @/ynverstappen that’s because fred assured me that you know what you’re doing 🤔

username15: saving that middle photo as my new lock screen as we speak 😍

username16: I cannot stress how happy I am that ferrari took a chance on yn!!

oscarpiastri: thanks for showing the world that you’re just a massive weirdo like the rest of us 😂

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by username17, username21 and 2,046 others

f1gossip: SPOTTED in monaco on the weekend off the circuit, carlos sainz and ferrari media manager yn verstappen were spotted looking very comfortable together on a boat. onlookers said the pair looked very happy and were particularly touchy with each other throughout their day. is there a new couple pending in the paddock?

361 comments

username17: I always had a suspicious feeling about these two 🤔

username18: ngl all I want to know is what’s going through max’s head rn…

username19: does this make charles an official third wheel???

username20: I want to be jealous but who can deny that they look so good together

username21: she must be special, carlos wouldn’t post the photos that he did the other day for no one 😂

username22: watch carlos insist that they’re still just friends in the media pen this week 🙃

username23: I thought ferrari hired yn for max…but maybe it was for carlos all along?!

username24: did they really think we wouldn’t notice how close the two of them actually are!?

username25: I can’t wait to see the content we get if they’re dating too 😂

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by maxverstappen1, carlossainz55 and 32,054 others

ynverstappen: another race means another set up and another day with my two favourite humans. they pull these faces and yet still agree to everything I say cause they adore me 🥺❤️

4,957 comments

username26: are we just gonna pretend this is all professional yn…🤨

charles_leclerc: in that first photo we were both asking for help and yet you chose to ignore us and make us suffer if I remember 🙄

ynverstappen: @/charles_leclerc I repeat, that’s why you adore me!!

maxverstappen1: I hope filming content is all that you’re doing with them!?

username27: I think one might adore you slightly more than the other 🤔

landonorris: something tells me that charles has no choice but to put up with you these days

georgerussell63: adore me = one of the drivers is hopelessly in love with me

username28: “please yn don’t make us do something stupid again!”

danielricciardo: if only you knew just how much carlos really talks about you 🎙️

username29: no one has ever made these two act so daft, yn must have some magical powers 😂

username30: I love how she brings the best out of carlos and charles just goes along with it for the fun!!

carlossainz55: there aren’t many people we would willingly make fools of ourselves for just so you know 👀

ynverstappen: @/carlossainz55 I’ll happily be the exception to the rule 👑

username31: whoever chose yn for the job will forever be known as my favourite person in the world

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris and 34,958 others

ynverstappen: look out for another challenge coming up on the socials later on this week, as ever I enjoyed annoying these two so much that they didn’t speak to me for the rest of the weekend 🏎️

5,937 comments

username32: I always look forward to the content that you bring us yn 🥺

oscarpiastri: we wouldn’t treat you like that at mclaren fyi 😉

charles_leclerc: @/oscarpiastri you don’t see the things she makes us do!!

username33: I refuse to believe that carlos didn’t actually speak to you for the rest of the weekend…

lewishamilton: is this the sort of thing I’ve got to look forward to 😬

carlossainz55: my ass will never be the same after bouncing on that space hopper 🤦🏻‍♂️

username34: can anyone actually remember a time when yn wasn’t at ferrari now???

scuderiaferrari: we can’t wait to see what you guys have been up to this week ❤️

charles_leclerc: @/scuderaiferrari does health and safety not matter to you guys anymore??

username35: in every photo yn looks like such a proud aunt that she’s tormenting our boys 😂

landonorris: whatever you do don’t get the boys to race on those space hoppers, I’ve been there and it doesn’t end well 😂😂

danielricciardo: @/landonorris hands down still one of the funniest moments of my career 🙌🏻

username36: I don’t think carlos would ever describe yn as annoying!!

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by maxverstappen1, alex_albon and 1,038,261 others

carlossainz55: if someone was to ever ask me what my dream weekend looks like, these are the photos that I would show them ✈️🌊🍳

128,505 comments

username37: not that we needed it, but surely that first photo is definitely yn! 😍

maxverstappen1: at least we know whoever she is (😉) she’s well fed up and seeing the sun!

charles_leclerc: thank you for giving me some much needed peace and quiet this weekend 😂

username38: you know it’s serious when carlos is making pancakes for her!!

landonorris: how come it’s been six years and you’ve not made pancakes for me, yet a certain someone else has already had them!?

carlossainz55: @/landonorris last time I checked we’ve never been in a relationship 🤔

username39: is he really trying to hide her face and put us off the scent like it isn’t obvious 🤦🏻‍♀️

oscarpiastri: we’re just gonna pretend like the whole world doesn’t already know who your girlfriend is are we??

username40: arguably a dream weekend for most of your fans too!!

ynverstappen: nice to see you getting plenty of rest old man 💕

carlossainz55: @/ynverstappen I just turned 30…this is abuse ‼️

username41: every time one of these two post I fall in love with them just a little bit more…

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

liked by ynverstappen, charles_leclerc and 1,294,483 others

carlossainz55: cuddles, kisses and champagne, if you ask me ferrari made the best decision ever hiring you ❤️✨

129,058 comments

username42: eurgh it’s not fair how adorable these two are 😭

landonorris: worst. kept. secret. ever.

oscarpiastri: @/landonorris I don’t think you can ever call these two a secret!

username43: I second that statement btw, best decision ever!!

charles_leclerc: well this explains why I always get the worse deal out of the two of us in all our videos 😂😂

username44: no one seems to be talking about the fact that max seems to be so supportive of these two too 🥺

maxverstappen1: who knew seeing my sister with a guy in red could actually be quite sweet ☺️

username45: from here on in charles shall always be known as the third wheel 😂

georgerussell63: just gonna pretend like I definitely had no idea that this was happening 🙃

danielricciardo: damn cause you did such a good job of pretending you two weren’t together 😝

username46: if yn doesn’t move to williams with carlos next year I don’t know what I’ll do…

ynverstappen: a definite perk of the job was meeting you 💞

carlossainz55: @/ynverstappen the best part of ferrari is definitely you!!

username47: who says that you shouldn’t mix work with pleasure, looks like it paid off for these two!

˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚＊

˗ˏˋ 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ! ´ˎ˗

[obscurevideogames]

Tumblr’s Core Prodct Stratgy

Here at Tumblr, we’ve been working hard on trying to keep our sinking ship afloat for as long as possible. This means desperately trying to copy every new fly-by-night social media app that some multi-billionaire sh*t out during their daily Peloton routine. What follows is the strategy we're using to accomplish the goal of user growth. If you find the things we say here worrisome, please understand that is our exact intention. You've outgrown our target demographic. Don't let the door hit you on the way out.

The Diagnosis

It's lookin' pretty bad y'all!

After somehow losing hundreds of thousands of users during the great pr0n purge of 2018, we started to wonder if anything could be done to get back to where we were. We even brought in a management consultant who charged us a ridiculous amount of money. It would make you sick if you knew how much, but we got a few nice meals out of it at least. Anyhow, we handed this guy the app, and HE HAD NO IDEA HOW TO USE IT! It was f*cking hilarious! But suddenly it all clicked -- our users are a bunch of stupid idiots who can't even do basic arithmetic. I mean, they spend all day looking at their phones, so what do you expect?

Tumblr’s best feature is its unique content and vibrant communities. But who cares, right? We're just as happy getting traffic from people sh*t-posting memes, vague-booking, giving out-of-context hot takes to news events, and spewing whatever random thought is in their head at the moment. Plus that stuff doesn't p*ss off Apple.

To keep this thing going we need new people. And by "people" we mean teenagers, like we used to have back in the good ol' days. Unfortunately we're all in our 40s now, so we have no idea what they want. But teenagers are so cool! Imagine if they talked to us like we're one of them? We're getting hard just thinking about it.

Our Guidng Principls

To make Tumblr cool again, we must address these huge glaring issues.

People can look at a blog without logging in. How is that fair to all the poor schlubs who had to fill out forms to get an account? Also we haven't figured out a way to force ads onto the personalized pages yet. But we swear that's not the main reason.

People can see content they are looking for or linked to. People can keep up with blogs they follow. But the problem with this is, people don't know what they want. We know what they want! We're smart. We wrote this damn site, remember?

Promote posts that incite pointless conversations. Posts that are guaranteed to bait every troll into responding. Isn't that why all your Magat relatives love Facebook so much? We can do that!

P*ss off your content creators in every way possible (see #2).

Create algorithms that throw an unending barrage of irrelevant content in your face. Have you seen Instagram lately? We could do that so easy!!!

The app is slow. The website is slow. Obviously this is because of GIFs. Facebook and Instagram don't allow them, so why should we?

Conclusion

Our mission changes on a day-to-day basis. Right now we're super jealous of all the attention that new Threads thing is getting. We're still not sure what it is, but we're gonna download it after work.

[chaostudee]

leaked , george russell

summary : you are george russell's assistant to the public eye but to george you are much more than that. warnings : language. faceclaim : maria isabel a/n : literally had this idea at like 2am last night but im acc obsessed eeek

y/nusername i'm just a girl

by landonorris, georgerussell, oscarpiastri and 560,819 others.

landonorris are those my shorts 👀

y/nusername maybe.....

user i want to be y/n when i grow up !!

f1fan GIRL WE NEED THE CURLY HAIR ROUTINE

username_67 we need a clothing line asap girll

kikagomes ugh my gorge bsf 💋

oscarpiastri i'm just a girlll 🎶

y/nusername you get it

user829 stopp y/n's relationship with all the drivers is adorable :)

georgerussell summer break, with the best company 🫶

liked by lewishamilton,landonorris, charlesleclerc and 1,679,910 others.

f1fan ugh to be that dog

landonorris basic asf fit

georgerussell this acc hurt me

user829 awwww

f1lover_88 this is so cute omggg

charlesleclerc you up for a playdate with leo??

georgerussell ofcccc

y/nprivate summer with you <3

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, georgerussell and 200 others.

georgerussell i love you sm

landonorris WHY WASN'T I THERE

oscarpiastri fr

y/nusername selfies.

liked by landonorris, georgerussell, lewishamilton and 382,920 others.

kikagomes im obsessed with u acc

y/nusername 💋

user829 oh wow

f1fan ugh to be her though

f1lover damnnnn

landonorris 👀

georgerussell 👀

georgerussell WE ARE BACK!!!

》 y/nusername mine

》 georgerussell all yours

》 user22 oh yum

》 f1fan yesss we are backkkk

》 user11 acc cant wait for this weekend omggg

y/nusername

》 user819 HELP PLS I LOVE HER

》 f1fan WBJSSNSSK

》 user01 george memes give me life

》 georgerussell me running to my phone whenever u post

y/nusername this weekend :)

liked by lewishamilton, georgerussell, landonorris and 632,891 others.

user10 mercedes one two :)

justaninchident ugh my queen

user9229 i wish my weekly dump was like this 😩

f1fan y/n how do u feel this weekend went??

y/nusername great, as usual george and lewis tried their best but so happy with a double podium hehe

landonorris should've been me and oscar on the podium

georgerussell boy please 😀

y/nprivate date night

liked by kikagomez, landonorris, georgerussell and 471 others.

kikagomes love u both smm <33

y/nusername love u smmm

landonorris cuteee

georgerussell my gorgeous girl

georgerussellupdates GEORGE RUSSELL SPOTTED WITH HIS ASSISANT Y/N AT A KNICKS GAME !!

liked by f1fan, justaninchident, f1lover and 56,910 others.

f1fan WHAT WHAT

justaninchident guys calm down they are just close friends they have literally seen this before

f1lover i love them idc what ya'll say

user11 not y/n plsss i hate her she's so annoyinggg

anon why george

user337 omfg leave them alone its acc none of our business

username_92 👀👀

y/nusername last night 🏀

liked by georgerussell, oscarpiastri, kikagomez and 711,620 others.

knicks hope u had the best time

y/nusername yesss ilyyy 🙈

user818 outfit details plssss

f1fan why tf was she with george

user910 shes literally his assistant wdym???

kikagomes ate

y/nusername thanks to my stylist ;)

landonorris girl since when do u like basketball

anon gold digger

y/nusername

》 georgerussell i still don't understand this trend 🙃

》 y/nusername it's okay i love u anyway

》 user929 and this is why y/n is iconic

》 landonorris george is demure, oscar is mindful and im cutesy.

》 y/nusername no because literally 😭😭

》 oscarpiastri i hate this trend acc

y/nusername my bsf (and her annoying bf)

liked by kikagomes, pierregasly, georgerussell and 916,810 others.

pierregasly umm excuse me but why am i annoying???

y/nusername because u stole kika from me 😪

user82 my fav wagsss

f1fan78 no cause why are pierre and kika so cuteeee

user11 oh to be a wag

justaninchident hehe i love them

georgerussell hi everyone i just wanted to come on here to address a few things. a few days ago a social media account posted private messages between me and my girlfriend y/n. i am utterly disgusted that our privacy and private life was invaded this way and i do not condone any hateful backlash and comments to y/n or our relationship. for this such reason we decided to keep our relationship out of the public eye. i hope you can all understand that me and y/n will be taking a break from social media to focus on ourselves. thank you for all your support always ❤️

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, lewishamilton and 2,829,923 others.

y/nusername ❤️

georgerussell ❤️

lewishamilton i'm so sorry that this happened to you guys, i'm here for you both.

georgerussell appreciate it mate 👍

landonorrris y/n and george stan forever

oscarpiastri mom and dad

taglist ⭑.ᐟ

@mxryxmfooty

@hadidsworld

@llando4norris

@lottalove4evelyn

@heavy-vettel

[imoncloud7]

suna rintaro headcanons

general:

has a meme folder in his phone with over 2000 pics & videos and uses them as reaction photos frequently

some are even of the twins LOL

has a google drive of all the school fight videos and charges people for them

hes actually really smart but chooses not to try in school?

suuuper close with his little sister

she calls him all the time when hes away at school (since hes not from hyogo)

they play roblox together every night

they play those princess roleplay games (fantasia) and a lot of dress to impress

hes literally a top model by now

he really like indie films esp horror movies

has never picked up a book in his life

he owns wired apple headphone for the "aesthetic"

the twins clown him for them and flex their airpods

hes an avid wearer of the uniqlo airism tee

has a silver chain he never takes off

lowkey would be a stalker and have burner ig and tiktok accounts

nonchalant king

literally hes so mysterious and girls looove that

he ran an anonymous account on instagram rating all the water fountains at school

had a lot of followers ngl

he takes his bed very seriously

like weighted blanket, silk sheets, the weighted dino stuffed animal from target, fresh water by his bed, magnesium and melatonin at night

doesn't let anyone sit in it with outside clothes on

neevvverrrr lets the twins sit in it

definitely uses "yh" when hes texting (absolutely tf not)

as a boyfriend:

he was plottin on you since the start

but bc hes nonchalant af you had no idea

hes really perceptive so he could kinda tell you reciprocated those feelings

so he took that as his sign and he confessed first

he was super casual about it

you guys were walking back to the dorms after his practice one day and he just kinda dropped it on you

"yo can i tell you something"

LMAOOOO

he was kindddd of awkward about it

but its ok!! now youre dating!!!

his love language is def physical touch

this man takes his cuddling time SERIOUSLY

youre one of the only people he frequently lets in his bed

you guys stay up till 2 am cuddling and giggling with one another about stupid shit

so many sneaky sleepovers (the dorms dont usually allow opposite genders in the same room)

yall r one of those couples that sit in the corner and talk shit about everyone in the room like whispering in each others ears and laughing

esp about the twins

you two have a very long streak of word hunt going back and forth

you guys also send a lot of voice memos ranting back and forth

his sister loves you!! she doesn't have an older sister, so you fill that role. only so much that suna can do for her

she texts you a lot too lol

you join them in playing roblox every night

so many 2 am convenience store runs