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#i made these for myselfs so i will say. if you are mean to harry in the tags i'll be sad. think about it
isalisewrites · 23 hours
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TERRIBLE, BUT GREAT - CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
SUMMARY:
“Harry Potter.” The cold burrowed into his flesh, the scent of cloying death and molding earth clogged his senses.
“The Boy Who Lived.”
A strange sense of loss and disappointment rose within him. That brilliant, yet cruel boy could’ve been so much more if he’d not stepped down this bloodied path.
Terrible, but great. He pitied this creature.
“Come to die.”
Harry Potter faced the flash of green light with the bravery of a Gryffindor and the broken heart of a Hufflepuff.
---
When Death gives Harry a third option, one that can save everyone he ever cared about, he takes it unflinchingly. Even when that means doing the impossible: falling in love with the enemy, Tom Riddle.
---
THIRTY-FIVE EXCERPT:
“Well, if she’s not your type, Harry, I’m sure I could help you find—”
Roland’s spoon snapped in half; he flinched with a sharp gasp, dropping the broken end of his spoon; it clinked onto the table. The flare of familiar magic crackled and prickled against Harry’s skin, his neck and arm hair standing on end. A faint shiver slid through Harry at the feel of it. The other Slytherin boys froze, their collective gazes swiveling onto Tom.
Tom’s knuckles were white; his tight grip on his fork shook. Tom’s lips thinned, their color stark against his pale skin.
Alphard blinked awake. “Did I just… feel accidental magic from Tom?” he asked in a sleepy voice. He scrunched his eyes. “That’s unusual.”
The blood drained further from Tom’s cheeks.
Roland grinned. “Oho,” he drawled in delight. He grabbed another fork. He leaned an elbow onto the table, glee in his eyes. “Did you wanna shag her, Tom? I’m sure she’d get over herself if you asked with your usual charm—”
Roland’s second fork flung upwards, snapping in half midair. A couple of Slytherin girls cried out, while everyone in the vicinity ducked; the broken fork clanged onto the table, one part landing in a pitcher of pumpkin juice and sending a spray of liquid everywhere. The other piece landed on Simon’s plate, splattering his breakfast all over his front.
Bloody hell.
“Damn,” murmured Alphard.
Quintus’ lips trembled with the visible effort of holding back a smirk.
Cheeks a bright pink with his features pinched in suppressed emotion, Tom bolted to his feet and threw his bag over his shoulder; he fled the Great Hall.
Quintus smacked Roland on the shoulder; Roland squawked in protest. “You have no tact whatsoever,” he muttered.
“Me?” cried Roland. “After what you said a few weeks ago? Have you heard the shit the two of you go on about? I wasn’t saying anything weird. I was just asking if—”
“You were crass,” said Simon. His brow twitched low; his nostrils flared. He vanished the mess from his robes with a roll of his eyes. “And you know this already.”
Roland grinned. He shrugged and didn’t say anything.
Marcus shook his head. “Still… that was a bit strange, wasn’t it?”
“What was?” asked Sebastian.
“I think that’s the first time I’ve ever seen uncontrolled magic from Tom.”
---
What in Salazar’s name was that?
Tom was trembling; his magic rippled beneath his skin, wild and restless. He could feel the disquiet and the agitation in his very magic.
He hid in an alcove next to a suit of armor and covered his face with his hands. He never lost control like that. Never. What was happening to him? This was utter madness. I’m losing myself. Control was his strength. He could not lose that. Control over himself was what set him apart from everyone else. Total control over his emotions, his body, his magic. With these, he could control everyone else.
But if he lost that… He lost everything that made Tom who he was.
This didn’t make any sense.
He was getting enough sleep. His wand wasn’t disobeying him or causing any trouble at all. Since when did he have problems with his accidental magic? He never had issues like that. He hadn’t even had issues with it when he was a child, at least not for long. He’d quickly learned how to have total control over his magic as a child.
What is this? What is happening to me?
Tom leaned against the wall, his head knocking lightly against the brick. He took a deep calming breath. Calm down. If he analyzed what was said and what had triggered the lose of control, he’d be able to mitigate losing it the next time.
Olive.
That awful girl had been the problem.
Right?
Having the audacity to break traditions, asking Harry out as her date—they weren’t a couple, so where had she come off with the gall to ask Harry to the Yule Ball? If she’d waited, she might’ve gotten a dance out of Harry.
The suit of armor creaked beside him. The fire in the nearby lamps flickered. Tom’s heart rate spiked. The control over his magic began slipping again and he had to place a hand over his heart in the effort to calm it down.
Okay, maybe she wasn’t the only problem.
It was the idea of Harry dancing with her that irritated him and Tom wasn’t sure what to make of this strange feeling that bubbled and coiled deep within his gut.
And Roland’s disgusting language about sleeping with her irritated Tom even further.
The idea of finding Harry in a forbidden tryst with the girl in the confines of a broom cupboard filled Tom with apocalyptic levels of rage.
Right, that was a very normal reaction. Right. He certainly didn’t feel the same way when Alphard and Quintus got up to their mischief. Why should he feel any differently about Harry?
Oh, but he did.
And Tom didn’t understand why.
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einaudis · 6 months
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ALL OF US STRANGERS (2023) dir. ANDREW HAIGH
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livvyofthelake · 1 month
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joel mchale in the american housewife finale btw. as cooper's dad that's crazy.... AND jim rash is still here playing that waiter who sucks at his job and is a huge cunt <3 i miss community....
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harrysfolklore · 2 months
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spill your guts or fill your guts
all i have to say is, i miss this man so much
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
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When Harry told you that the Late Late Show asked him to do the 'Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts' segment with you as the guest, you didn't think twice before accepting the invitation.
However, as you sat in front of a table full of plates with bizarre and disgusting food, your boyfriend in front of you ready to ask you uncomfortable questions and cameras rolling catching your every reaction, you started to regret considering it in the first place.
"How are you feeling about this?" Harry asked when the cheers and applause died down, giving you his million dollar smile that made everyone drool over him.
"I can't believe I agreed to do this." You said shaking your head as you adjusted your top, giving a nervous smile to the audience.
Harry turned his head to the camera before speaking, "This is our first time, playing the game I mean," he smirked for a second, making the audience cheer and shake your head again, "And the last time we will do it also, right love?" and the blush didn't fail to appear in your cheeks at the pet name, because no matter how long you and Harry had been together, he could still make you blush like the first time.
"Right, indeed," you nodded your head, "Let's take a look at the food we have on the table."
"Okay so, we have Bug Trifle," Harry said and the audience instantly let out a collective sound of disgust, "Yeah ew," he mimicked making you laugh and he smiled slightly because your nerves were slowly fading away, "Jellyfish," the audience groaned again and Harry couldn't help himself before he mimicked them one more time "Yeah, ugh!" you laughed again as he continued naming the food for the game, that consisted in giant water scorpion, 1,000 year old eggnog, cow blood and pork tongue jelly, cod sperm, salmon smoothie and bull penis. 
"So I'll ask the first question, the producers have not shown us these ahead of time, and before I choose the food you'll have to eat I want to say something," Harry paused to look at the camera for a minute before turning to you again, "I love you babe, I consider myself a good boyfriend, and I hope I'm still a good boyfriend after this," the audience erupted in cheers and howls, and the blush rushed into your cheeks again, "That being said, let's start with the 1,000 year old eggnog."
"Nooo!" you couldn't help but squeal when the food was placed in front of you, "You know I love you too but you might end up taking the couch tonight!" Harry chuckled and the audience laughed along with him, "Is the cinnamon supposed to make this any better?" you grabbed the cinnamon stick making a disgusted face at the drink.
"Give it a sniff." Harry spread his arms as it was the most obvious thing.
"Why?" you asked but sniffed the drink anyway, "Oh my god! That's disgusting!" Harry laughed and you felt the urge to throw up without even tasting it yet.
"Come on love, It's gonna be fine," Harry sent you a wink and you rolled your eyes with affection, "Ready?" 
"No! But let's get this over with."
"Okay," Harry said as he grabbed the card to read the first question, and when he let out a devilish laugh you knew you were in for a ride, "You are great friends with the girls from BlackPink, you have been on tour together and released multiple collaborations, rank the members Jennie, Lisa, Jisoo and Rosé."
He finished the question and the audience erupted in screams and cheers, it was no secret that you and the BlackPink girls were the best of friends and they were dying to hear your answer.
You grabbed the cup and moved it close to your face scrunching your nose at the smell, "Hold on, I think I can answer it," Harry raised his brow and tilted his head at you before you continued, "I mean, I love all of them so much, and this doesn't mean I love any of them any less, It's just based on how close-"
"Drink the eggnog." Harry interrupted your rant making the audience laugh.
"Noooo!" you protested, refusing to drink the beverage, "Okay, it would be like, Jennie, Rosé, Jisoo and Lisa."
You said quickly and instantly covered your face in embarrassment, even thought the girls would understand that it's all part of the game.
"Whoo!" Harry said laughing and putting an amused face, "That was controversial, love."
"Oh shut up, It's your turn."
"Alright, now you choose something for me that I would have to eat." 
"I'll do the sperm." you said turning the table to place the food in front of him.
"Okay."
"Here you go."
"Okay." he said again and the crowd laughed for a minute.
"Just so all you know, this is exactly how an argument between us looks like, me yelling like a maniac and him just saying okay," the audience laughed again and Harry just shook his head and shrugged his shoulders.
"Alright," you said before clearing your throat and grabbing the card with his question, "Oh I'm dying to know this," your smirked before continuing, "Which songs on your One Direction albums are about me?"
Harry instantly covered his eyes and started laughing at the question, over the years fans have speculated about songs by the band were about you, since Harry confirmed he had a crush on you ever since you were on tour together.
With the crowd cheering and your expectantly look on him, Harry grabbed the napkin that was on the table to put it on his neck and try to cut the cod sperm, "Sooo, I would say track number-"
"No! Answer it or eat it!" you interrupted him and he had no other choice but to grab a piece with the fork that instantly made him make a disgusted face.
"Just don't look at it."
"Oh yeah, that fixes everything. Just don't look at it!" Harry sassed at you, "What we doing?" he looked at the camera almost in disbelief.
"This was your idea! Now go," and with a final look at you, he put the cod sperm on his mouth and started chewing it, looking directly at the camera as he did it.
"Just swallow it, why do you keep chewing on it."
"To spit or to swallow, that is the question," and the crowd broke down in laughs again at his cheekiness as he spit the cod sperm on the bucket beside him, "Really carries an aftertaste, fancy a kiss, love?" he tried to stand up and you stopped him immediately.
 "Nope! No kissing until we wash our mouths properly!"
"Okay so, I'll give you the salmon smoothie now."
And if Harry wasn't your boyfriend that you loved him so much and you weren't on live television, you swore you could murder him on the spot for giving you the food that you hated the most.
"Why are you doing this to me? You know I hate salmon."
"Come on love, I'm putting you up for a challenge," you rolled your eyes and he smiled before grabbing the card with your question, "Okay, you were part of Versace's newest campaign alongside some of the most popular supermodels in the world, who was the most unlikable out of all of them?"
"I have the answer. I can't say it, though," and without further notice, you grabbed the glass and took a big gulp of the salmon smoothie, feeling disgusted when the flavor hit your tongue and grabbing a glass of water to erase the aftertaste.
"Watching you drink that made me feel sick." Harry handed you his napkin and you wiped your mouth as you looked around the table to choose the next food for him.
"Okay, I'll give you the bug trifle," you grabbed the card with the question, "We have been dating for three years now, do you see yourself dating me for another three years?" 
"That's easy, yes," he shrugged and the audience went nuts at his confession, and your cheeks were blushing again as your heart melted.
"You're such a sap, and on national television too!" you teased him and he srugged again.
"I'm just a boy who's in love, can you blame me?" The crowd awed and you rolled your eyes as you encouraged him to give you your next food.
"I think we're going to go with bull penis," he cheekily smiled for a moment, "Yeah, bull penis. You ready?"
"No, but you could go."
"It's just bull penis," he said as he grabbed the next card, and when he read what was on it he instantly let out a mischievous laugh that made you nervous about what was coming, "Okay, who is the most surprising celeb to ever slide into your DMs?"
"Who is he?" Harry yelled after a few minutes of silence from you and you laughed at his antics, "That's information I must know, babe."
"I feel like I can say it, right?"
"You're telling me who was it off camera anyway, so?"
"Shut up!" you paused for a moment to think about if you should whether or not reveal that the most surprising celebrity that tried to hit on you via Instagram was no other than Liam Payne, your boyfriend's former bandmate, even tho he knew that you and Harry were happily in a relationship and you couldn't be less interested.
 "I think I'm eating the penis," deciding to be a nice person and not embarrass him on national television, you said and grabbed a piece of it to put in your mouth, "Oh my god! That was disgusting."
You grabbed the bucket beside you and threw the piece in as Harry laughed.
"Just so we're clear, however was that bloke, I hope you know she's taken, by me." Harry shrugged and gave the camera an innocent look.
"For your last question I'm giving you... the scorpion thing," you read his question and it was your turn to give him a devilish look, "Between Louis, Liam, Niall and Zayn rank their solo-"
And before you could even finish the question, Harry already had the giant scorpion on his mouth, making you, the audience on set and his thousands of fans watching at home scream and laugh.
He spat on the bucket after chewing for a minute, took a big gulp of water and wiped his mouth before turning to the camera to wrap up the segment.
"That was 'Spill your guts or fill your guts', we'll be right back with more of the Late Late Show!"
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avatar-anna · 25 days
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Where It All Began
Hockey Player! Harry x Figure Skater! Reader
i had this finished hours ago and then tumblr didn't save it and i wanted to throw my phone out a window.
also, i don't write smut so if it's bad say nothing 🫣
When you saw Harry on the other side of your open door, you immediately slammed it shut in his face.
"Oh, come on, princess, don't be like that!"
"Go away!" you groaned loud enough that he could hear through the door.
Harry did not go away. His head thudded against the door instead. You could almost picture his forehead pressed against it, small pout on his lips for not getting his way.
"Are you really going to ignore me? After everything we've been through together?"
No. "Yes. And stop calling me princess!" you said, a little louder this time.
"I know you love it," Harry said. "You had quite a different reaction when I said it last week. A week, princess. How long are you gonna keep me in agony here?"
The night in question was one you'd been trying and failing to forget. It was a slip, a lapse in judgement, something you didn't think about carefully before doing it, and now look at where you were. Harry had been trying to talk to you, both discreetly and not so discreetly ever since, but you'd given him the cold shoulder, for no other reason than if you stayed too long in his presence you might've slipped again.
Hooking up with your mortal enemy was a horrible idea, one you were now paying dearly for.
With a scoff, you said through the door, "Don't act like half the school isn't lined up to sleep with you. Go be with one of them."
It was one of the reasons why you tried to stay away from Harry. You didn't judge him for his alleged sexual prowess, but you wanted someone committed to you and only you. If you wanted someone, that is. Between your studies and figure skating, there was no room for relationships of any kind, especially not with arrogant hockey players. Especially not Harry Styles.
"You really want that to be it?" Harry asked, ignoring your comment. "I mean it was great, but a coat closet isn't conducive to showing off my best work. Come on, princess, let me show you some of my best work."
"Maybe I don't want to because it wasn't satisfying enough." Liar. You knew it, and he knew it too.
"The stains on my shirt from you squirting everywhere say otherwise," he said, and your cheeks heated immediately. You could hear the smirk in his voice, the satisfaction in it as he remembered how you came on his fingers. It made your core pulse, but you mentally scolded yourself.
"Nothing to say to that, huh? I thought so," he said. "I can't help it now that I'm hooked, Y/n. I need that everywhere. Can you imagine riding me when you do that? Or sitting on my face? God please sit on my—"
You finally opened the door and yanked Harry inside before slamming it shut again. "Keep your voice down!" you hissed.
If you weren't so annoyed with him, you would've noticed Harry was looking at you with hearts in his eyes, but it would be a long time before you realized he looked at you like that all the time.
But unfortunately, all you saw was his smirk, his dimples set deep in his cheeks as he looked you up and down. "It wouldn't have been a problem if you had just let me in in the first place. It's not my fault you need a physical barrier to keep yourself from throwing yourself at me."
"I—I did not throw myself at you!"
"You did, but that's okay. I liked it."
"You're infuriating!"
"And you're stubborn! And blind!"
"Blind? To what?"
With each word exchanged, Harry backed you up until your back hit your bed. There was nowhere left to run, nowhere to hide. It was either push him away or give in to him.
"Look at me, princess. I want to see those pretty eyes when I say this to you," he said, voice now hushed and gravelly now that he was in your room. You looked up, unable to ignore the command in his tone or the way it turned your insides molten.
"I want you, Y/n. I haven't been able to stop thinking about you since that night. Since—"
"Since?" you asked, curious why he stopped all of a sudden.
"Nevermind. The point is that I want you, and I know you want me. You can't tell me someone else has made you feel as good as I have."
No one had, and it was infuriating. You couldn't deny it, not when he was staring at you so intensely. So you fell back on your tried and true excuse. "I don't have time—"
"You think I have all sorts of free time?" Harry asked. "Both of our schedules are crazy, Y/n. All I'm asking is for you to give it a try."
"Give what a try? Sleeping together?"
Something shifted in Harry's expression, but it was back to his heated gaze before you could process it. "Yeah, princess. You need someone to take your frustrations out on? Take them out on me. Need a break from studying? I'm there. Just need someone to fuck you so hard that you forget how to think properly? Well, you saw what I did with just my fingers."
"So...just hooking up," you confirmed. "No dating."
"No dating," Harry agreed, his hand slipping to the back of your neck, the light touch sending shivers down your spine. "Just sex."
"And no one else can know," you managed to get out before finally giving in. Every cell in your body was screaming at you to kiss him, to tear his clothes off and taste him everywhere. But you had to say this first. "I don't want our friends weighing in or giving us a hard time."
"Might have to be really quiet sometimes, then. Think you can handle it?"
He was so self-assured. It was something that annoyed you to no end, but now made your pulse quicken. You were wet from the gravel in his voice alone, feeling it skitter along your skin and turning your core molten. You wanted him. It was time to stop denying yourself the pleasure he was promising you. But first, you needed to level the playing field a bit.
You kissed him, taking Harry by surprise but he was quick to recover. Shoving your hands in his hair, you threw off the baseball cap that always sat backwards on his head. He groaned against your mouth as you pulled at the roots, the sound going straight between your legs.
Hands were everywhere, and so was Harry's tongue. His mouth was on your neck, your jaw, your collar bones and chest. It was enough of a distraction to slip your hands to his waist, to flick off the button of his jeans and slide them down until they looked on the floor.
Harry stepped out of them with ease, following your lead as you turned until his back was against your bed. His eyes were heavy with lust, widening slightly as you got down on your knees and pulled his briefs down. You caught him in your hand, unable to stop yourself from licking your lips at the sight of him.
His cock was long and hard, the tip and angry shade of red, as if just blowing on it might send him over the edge. You did just that, curious to know the answer. Harry didn't come, but he made a strangled sound that made you smile. Looking up at him innocently, you finally asked him, "Can you?"
"Can I—Fuck. "Can I what, princess?"
You didn't answer right away, satisfied with making him wait. Satisfied with the moans and stuttered breaths and the harsh grip in your hair as you played with him.
Harry's cock was heavy in your mouth, and it took everything in you not to show how much you enjoyed sucking him off. Giving pleasure was something that got you off, but with him it was all dialed up. You could feel your underwear dampen as you took him further down your throat, your eyes watering as you bobbed back and forth.
Before he could hit the back of your throat, Harry's grip on your hair tightened and pulled you off him. Almost embarrassingly, you tried to reach him but he held you back.
"Can I what?" Harry repeated. His cheeks were flushed, and the look in his eyes promised a harsh throat fucking if you complied, so you did.
"Can you handle keeping your voice down too? From what I understand it doesn't seem like you can."
Harry chuckled like he was impressed, which pleased you in a way that it shouldn't have. You wanted to impress him all of a sudden. You wanted to please him.
"I guess we'll see. Get up on the bed."
You hesitated. As much as you wanted him inside you, you wanted him in your mouth more. You weren't finished yet. Or rather, Harry wasn't finished yet.
"What is it?" he asked.
You took him into your mouth again, losing yourself in the weight and feel of him on your tongue despite yourself. It was infuriating how much Harry turned you on despite how annoying he was. Mixed with your penchant for getting off and getting others off, you were a goner.
Harry's moans and the grip on your hair only fueled you. Your panties were nothing but a wet scrap of fabric at this point but you didn't care.
Before you could take him down the back of your throat, Harry pulled you off him again. In the fog of lust, you leaned for him involuntarily but he held you back.
Harry chuckled, his usual smirk not so irritating as it normally was. "A slut and a brat. I didn't know I was getting two for the price of one, but we'll work on that don't worry."
A flash of irritation came to the surface. "You're so—"
"Ah ah ah, let's get back to what you do best, yeah? If you wanna suck cock all day, by all means," Harry said, his voice so condescending you almost didn't want to, but your lust eventually won out.
You couldn't help it. You really did want him in your mouth.
"Fuck, there we go. I knew you couldn't resist for long."
"Shut up, you're ruining this for me."
"Sorry, princess, I'll let you focus. You can tap my thigh if it's too much. I have a feeling you might get carried away. Just had no idea you were such a slut for my cock."
You pinched Harry's leg instead as you worked your mouth further down his length. Hissing, he gripped your hair tight, a small warning to behave.
"What would all our friends say if they knew, huh? Everyone thinks you hate me, but in reality you can't go a whole week without my cock in you. That must really piss you off."
You breathed harshly through your nose, but Harry didn't miss that subtle squeeze of your thighs, proving him right. You could pretend all you wanted, he didn't seem to care one way or another. It probably satisfied him to no end to know that he got under your skin, that the focused, levelheaded good girl you appeared to be was a mere facade.
"You can't stand it, can you? And yet you're probably so fuckin' wet when I talk like this, huh? Dirty girl. My dirty girl. You look like a fucked out mess and you don't even care. I bet you even like it."
Harry pulled you off his cock, a small whimper leaving your swollen, drool covered lips. You looked up at him with wide, pleading eyes, too far gone to act like this wasn't exactly where you wanted to be.
"You look so cute," Harry cooed, gently wiping spit or precum from the corner of Y/n's mouth. That seemed to snap her out of her trance, and she swatted his hand away, reaching out for his length to finish him off. "Ah ah ah. I think I need to hear it first."
"Hear what?"
"How much you want this. How much you want me."
Y/n narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest as she sat back on her heels, not saying a single word.
"You can sit there and bruise your knees, princess," Harry said, running a hand over his dick, smiling slightly as he watched her eyes track the movement. "Maybe I'll just come on your face and leave without getting you off. But something tells me you might like that."
Your pussy throbbed at the thought, the little traitor, though you were starting to feel like giving in was easier than resisting, no matter how much Harry might tease you for it after.
"I get off on pleasuring other people, sue me," you snapped, pointedly looking away from Harry and his ministrations.
"True," Harry agreed. "But that's not the whole truth. Come on, Y/n. You know I'll reward you for being a good girl, but if you take too long..."
Swiping his thumb over his tip, Harry leaned his head back and moaned. The veins in his neck bulged as the muscles in his stomach contracted. His whole body was flushed pink. He really was gonna come.
"Fine! Fine," you huffed barely looking in his eyes. "I—I want you."
"You can do better than that," Harry teased, still pumping his shaft lightly. "Touch yourself while you convince me. I want to see what that little pussy will tell me if you can't say it with your words."
Whimpering, you dipped your fingers beneath your panties, gasping as they grazed your clit as they made their way down to your slit. You were soaked, which wasn't news to you, but the sound of two fingers pumping in and out of you with ease told Harry enough.
"Please," you whimpered. "I want to finish you off. I want you, Harry. Please let me suck your cock."
"Well, since you asked so nicely," Harry said, grinning almost evilly. "Keep playing with yourself too. But don't fucking come. I told you where I wanted you to squirt and it won't be on the fucking floor."
You moaned as you finally took him into your mouth again. He was close, his hips bucking into you frenetically. You focused on the tip, swirling your tongue over it while your hands took care of the rest. It was intoxicating, he was intoxicating. You lost yourself in the feel of him on your tongue, in the twinge of pain in your scalp as he kept a tight grip on your hair. You added a third finger to your throbbing pussy, moaning around Harry until it became too much.
"Come. Please come, Harry," you begged. "I'm so close and I—I can feel it."
Then, pulling your hand from your heat, you sucked at his tip, using the slickness of your hand to pump the rest of him before sliding back down his length. You could taste yourself on him, the sensation nearly sending you over the edge. Part of you wanted to know what Harry would do if you did come, if you disobeyed, but you figured there would be an opportunity for that. Right now, you wanted him, and you wanted to ride his face as reward for your hard work.
"God you're a fucking dream," Harry moaned, thrusting into your mouth after your little display.
He spilled into your mouth then, his cock twitching as you eagerly swallowed spurt after spurt of his cum. Harry cursed and moaned through it all, gently running a hand through your hair. You didn't want to let up, still in a trance as you tried to milk every possible bit out of him as possible.
"A slut in a good girl's clothes. Who knew," he said, chest rising rapidly as if he just did sprints on the ice.
Raising your brow, you licked your hand clean, keeping eye contact with him until he eventually brought you to your feet. Your legs were wobbly, but Harry steadied you. He kissed you hard, tongue thrusting into your mouth as if he was chasing the taste of your heat on your tongue. "If you wanted to get rid of me, you failed miserably, princess," he murmured onto your lips before hoisting you on your bed. You practically vibrated with anticipation, your pussy aching for his attention. It wouldn't take much to come since you were so close, but you figured your legs would be locked around Harry's head until he was ready to fuck you properly.
When Harry was situated on your bed the way he liked, he motioned for you to come closer. You crawled up the bed, stopping right before his face. His expression was eager as he helped you out of your shirt, his hands kneading your breasts appreciatively and tweaking your nipples until you moaned, moving your hips involuntarily.
"Don't or I swear to God I'm gonna come," you hissed, trying to hold your impending orgasm at bay.
"Hm. Another time then," Harry said. "Don't be gentle, okay? Make a mess out of me. Now move those panties to the side so I can get a good look at you.
It was the last intelligible thing either of you said for a while, you too lost in your own pleasure and Harry smothered in you, his hands guiding your hips and gripping your ass appreciatively. He moaned almost as much as you did, his tongue working over your slit, up to your clit, and down again over and over. You can rather quickly because of everything that happened before, your legs trembling as you tried to move off him. But he held you down, seating you on him once more.
"No."
"Harry, I—"
"No. You're not done coming yet. I need at least two more," he said before sticking two fingers into your hole and latching his lips around your clit.
He pumped at a bruising pace, sucking and flicking the tip of his tongue, driving tears to your eyes from the overstimulation. It was almost painful, but your hips bucked in time with Harry's fingers. And even though you'd never done it before in such quick succession, you could feel a second orgasm barreling through you. The pressure built and built, and all it took was the graze of Harry's teeth against your clit to send you over.
The pleasure was so intense you were pretty sure you blacked out. Harry's fingers didn't let up, curling into you and making you climax for the third time before you even finished your second.
You don't know if you screamed, you don't know if you stopped making sound altogether. All you knew was pure euphoria and the slide of Harry's tongue on your trembling thighs as he lapped up the messy aftermath of your two consecutive releases. His nose graze your clit, and you twitched, twitched, moaning or sobbing or begging, you couldn't tell.
"Okay, princess, time to lay down," Harry said.
You felt lighter than air as he laid you flat on your back. You were pretty sure you had pillows, but you couldn't recall how to ask. All you knew was the man beside you who knew how to make you c so hard you saw stars.
The same man kissed you before sliding off the bed and you reached for him, something you would never normally do. "Where—You—You're not staying with me?"
Harry's features softened as he kissed you again, this time on your cheek. "Gotta get you cleaned up. Gotta clean myself up for that matter. I'll be quick, I promise."
"Okay."
Harry was quick, just as he promised. A warm towel between your legs, your bed dipping, Harry's body wrapped around yours, the smell of his body wash comforting as it engulfed you—it all made your eyes heavy.
"Where are my pillows?" you finally asked, realizing you were using his arm as one instead.
"They, uh, took the brunt of your special talent, along with my face," he said, only slightly teasing.
"Sorry," you said, cheeks pinking.
"You'll never hear me complaining about that," Harry said, kissing your neck. "Might have to have that regularly. You've made an addict out of me."
You had enough energy to pinch the arm wrapped around you. "Pig."
"Go to sleep, princess. You're not you when you're high on orgasms, and I miss our verbal spats."
You didn't need to be told twice and fell asleep almost instantly. When you woke up, Harry and any and all traces of him were gone. Your pillows were back on the bed without their pillowcases. One glance at your hamper told you where Harry put them before he left.
Part of you didn't like that he left while you were asleep, but as the fog of sleep wore off and you fitted a shirt over your head, you told yourself it was for the best. Especially when a couple minutes later your roommate walked in.
"Hey, Y/n," she said as she set her backpack by her desk.
"Hey," you replied, stretching your arms high above your head before covering a yawn.
"I don't think I've ever seen you so tired in the middle of the day. Tough workout at the rink this morning?"
You couldn't help but grin, your afternoon with Harry replaying in your head. Despite the earth-shattering orgasms only a couple hours ago, you felt your core pulse at the memory.
"Yeah. Something like that."
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garagepaperback · 4 months
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What are your favorite drarry fics?
oh. ooooooooooooh oh oh.
here are my staples:
draco, the magic dragon - libbydrew a fic i first read on livejournal (showing off the varnish of my casket here) that i thought about regularly for the almost two decades i fell out of fandom. canon to me tbh. libby invented my draco rubric: proud lil showboat even when everything around him has gone to rancid shit, sarcastic and aloof personality as a poor facade to distract from the big ol' gaping well of hurt.
Potter took a great breath, then let it out slowly – a low whistle between his teeth. "Malfoy, I had no idea. I thought—" "Why are you here?" Draco cut him off before the idiot embarrassed them both. Their shared past was water under the bridge – even if Draco had drowned in it.
nightingale - michi_the_killer
another back-in-my-day fav, even though i can only stand to read half of it. actually even thinking about it is making me stare off in a distance for upwards of three minutes. this one i would hand off wrapped in about a million miles of caution tape. + also a huge fan of michi's gory veela fic.
It was better than fighting, Harry thought, although sometimes he still wanted to rip into Malfoy, to hurt him. Other days, he thought, it was better than anything.
rookie moves - peu_a_peu
what can i say that hasn't already been said - peu is a MASTER. if you somehow know who i am but haven't read this, reassess your life choices through professional means but not until after you dive in.
“Feels kinda big,” Malfoy said, smirking. “For a guy your height.” “My height is average,” Harry said, although he was undeniably glaring upward at Malfoy’s face when they stood so close together. “And it is kinda big.”
stately homes of wiltshire - waspabi another one that crept into my heart and made a home. hard to choose between this and waspabi's other drarry fic, but there's something about the decrepit manor that just does it for me. a perfect harry and draco, perfect soft reaching towards each other.
Draco smiled and dragged Potter from the shop before he could charm any more elderly ladies with his unkept, take-care-of-me-I’m-confused-and-have-nice-shoulders aesthetic. Once outside in the drizzle, he realised he still had his hand around Potter’s forearm. He yanked his hand back immediately.
i wake up falling - warmfoothills
warmfoothills :,) just reading this moniker makes me vision go soft around the edges. their writing has made me out loud, quietly say "oh," multiple times. the prose is darling, this story is such a brief, aching glance. it was also really hard to pick just one (flashback, warm nights i also go in for).
“I love you,” he says, unable to stop himself. Draco blinks, a barely-there flinch, like Harry’s taken a swing at him. “I know,” he says, still oblivious to the reference, oblivious to the way his words scoop right into the meat of Harry’s stupid, hopeful heart. “It’s not enough, is it?” Draco shakes his head. Above, the stars watch unfeelingly on.
the pure and simple truth - lettered no one does dialogue with the mastery lettered does. my GOD. my god. i feel like this fic is drarry perfectly distilled.
“What’s he going to be?” Blaise raised a brow. “Pardon?” “You said he says Hermione should be Minister, and all those other things. What does Malfoy think he should be?” There was something much like pity in Blaise’s eyes. “He thinks he should never, ever be forgiven for the things he’s done.” Harry felt ill. “That’s not fair.” “When has Draco ever been fair?” “I meant―” Harry swallowed hard. “That’s not right.” Blaise looked more pitying still. “When has Draco ever been right?”
far from the tree - aideomai
the writer i avoid talking about the most bc once i start i cannot physically restrain myself from going on about their beauty forever. i sat for forty-five solid minutes frowning, trying to choose between this one and in the hand. and dwelling. okay anyway. i keep a doc of quotes from fics that resonate and it's 50% aideomai.
Draco wondered what Potter thought of this day, in the future the twins came from. If he had told Ginny about it. If he had forgotten it. He couldn’t forget it, could he? It felt burned into Draco’s body already, a final point that he had been moving toward for years without knowing.
i could go on but i think seven is a nice solid number tyvm for this ask!
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fluoresensitive · 3 months
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it's so hard to say goodbye to yesterday.
I’ve been on Tumblr for a really, really, really long time. I joined back in 2012, when I was thirteen years old. Like pretty much every thirteen-year-old who finds themselves on Tumblr, I was closeted and depressed and lonely. I was so isolated from my peers due to my autism that I had been taken out of school and was being homeschooled. Other than church activities, Tumblr was my only way of looking out into a scary, “secular” world that I was shielded from.
It was bliss! The first blog I ever had was an Alan Rickman themed blog because I was obsessed with Alan Rickman. I liked reading about feminism from the massive amounts of feminist blogs there used to be, I liked seeing older Black people discuss racism, I liked knowing there was a place where it was okay to question my gender and sexuality and my upbringing.
 It rocked my world! I got into fandom spaces, I got into writing fanfiction and roleplaying. Some of my best memories are me auditioning for Harry Potter Marauder Era roleplay groups. And then discovering independent roleplaying, creating my own characters or roleplaying as my favorites with no group behind me. People who remember me from way, way, way back will know I used to roleplay as Hannibal Lecter, as Gustavo Fring, as my most successful and important OC I’ve created Agatha Garcia, a baking witch with a sad story. Even writing this now I’m beaming because despite the traumas of being in these kinda icky spaces. Tumblr was an escape, it was magical.
Of course, there were not-so-great moments. In 2014, I was angry about anti-Blackness and my God was Tumblr’s fandom spaces anti-Black. You couldn’t discuss real life issues without being accused of being a reverse racist, you couldn’t discuss the realities of being Black in America (especially, after Mike Brown’s death) without being shouted down about keeping the peace. I was not a peaceful teenager. I was angry, I was awake, and I was not going to take anything laying down. Because of my less than serene posting, I got callout posts, I got a reputation for being mean and a bully and aggressive. I took it as a badge of honor—of course these racist motherfuckers think I’m a bully! I leaned into it, I got angrier, but eventually, around 2016, I broke from the roleplay community, and drifted off into a world of my own.
First it was called musespiration, then blvckmuseum, a way for me to sit at the periphery of the roleplay community without interacting with it directly. I reblogged pictures of Black people that I hoped would be inspirational and inspire them to keep creating their awesome original characters. Late 2016, I switched to vaantablack—one of my greatest eras, I think at least. I started making moodboards and posting little bits of my writing. I got into “trouble”, again, for being aggressive about anti-Blackness but this time I was surrounded by Black tumblr users, people who were more than happy to stand behind me. It didn’t matter how many ugly asks I got, there were people who liked me! Who thought I was smart and creative and funny. People who stood by me when my family went homeless in 2017, who celebrated with me when we were housed in 2018. I remember watching Beychella with all of Black tumblr, all of us screaming about the iconness the moment. I remember when Black Panther came out and we lost our collective minds. Ugh, what a time!
Around that time, I changed my URL from vaantablack to the now very recognizable fluoresensitive that is my brand, I guess? I changed my aesthetic (still sticking to my eerie changeling vibes) and started to knuckle down with posting my short stories. I built a thing for myself, made a community of (dwindling) Black tumblr users. More and more of us were being ran off the site—some accused falsely of being Russian bots, some driven away by the Klan-esque hordes of white (and non-Black) users who did not want us there. People I ki’d with, iconic trans women like Silver and Rashida, huge blogs like lagirl and hundondestiny and so on, were disappearing. No one wanted to deal with cruelty outside and on the computer.  
I stuck it out. Call it loneliness, call it bailing out a sinking shit; I stayed on Tumblr. I liked sharing, I liked having a place where people listened to me and trusted me and thought what I said I had value. I thought I was, in my small way, changing the world.
Even if I haven’t exactly shaken the roots of the blogging world, I hope I’ve touched people. I hope you think about my vaantablack or fluoresensitive, and you smile. I hope when you find me on bookshelves, you can share an anecdote about something I’ve said or posted. I hope I’ve helped you see the humanity in Blackness, the beauty of being nonbinary, the joy of lesbianism. I hope I gave you good recommendations for movies and books, I hope you enjoyed the horror-posting. And more than anything, to Black tumblr, I hope you remember me.
This is my final text post. I’ll be clearing out my likes slowly and answering a last few questions, but as of Friday the 21st, this’ll be an archive. I’ll miss you all.
If you want to follow my career and adventures, you can find me on Instagram, my professional Twitter, my Patreon, or my Substack. Long time friends/mutuals, please ask for my phone and email, I never want to lose contact with you!
(And, of course, if you want to make this Juneteenth goodbye especially sweet, here are my money links. Very overjoyed to never have to beg for help after this again, but thank God for everyone who gave to me throughout the years. I swear you’ve kept my family from living on the streets!)
paypal.me/marsinaries venmo.com/fluoresensitive
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folklvrsworld · 1 year
Text
between the books ♡
pairing: harry james potter x fem!reader
warnings: smut, unprotected sex, kissing, swearing/cussing, slightly spying
summary: reader is doing assignments in the library when she feels a pair of eyes watching her, harry decided to distract her and get her mind off of school for a hot minute
song: collide - justin skye, tyga
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Being a sixth year doesn't mean you can relax. Yes, we do have a lot more free time, but those free times are mostly used for doing homework, which the professors gave a lot, or studying for N.E.W.T. exams that we will have to do in our seventh year.
I was in the library, scribbling down answers for my defence against the dark arts homework, while constantly switching books. The library wasn't empty that day, but it wasn't full either. As I was writing, I felt like someone was watching me. I looked around, but no one was looking at my direction.
I shrugged it off and continued on what I was doing. I finally finished my homework and I closed the books, before putting them back in the right shelves. As I was returning the last book, I felt a presence behind me and before I could turn around, I felt someone kiss my neck.
"Harry..." I giggled quitely while turning around to see the raven haired boy standing in front of me.
"Took you long enough to notice me." he grinned and pecked my lips slowly.
I kissed him back and pulled away with a raised eyebrow, "What do you mean?"
"I've been watching you for the past ten minutes, I thought you would notice me, but you were very focused on your homework." he chuckled, kissing me again.
"I knew I felt someone was watching me." I said in between kisses, "Now we really shouldn't make out here, I have homework to do."
He groaned, "Oh come on, it's time for you to have a little break. What d'you say?" he smiled while running his hands up and down my waist.
I gulped and stared at him in the eyes, he wasn't wrong, I do need a little break. I've been doing homework for the past three hours, my fingers were tired from writing, my brain was tired from thinking, I needed a distraction.
"Fine.." I finally said, earning a big grin from him before he pinned me to the bookshelf and kissed my neck, "W-Wait...Here?!"
He pulled away and shrugged, "Why not? If you're comfortable with it, of course."
I reminded myself that we were on the back of the library, the section where no one really comes to, so if we were to do it here, it would be somewhat safe. We just have to be quiet.
"Okay...We have to be quiet though."
He chuckled, "You mean you have to be quiet, princess." he smirked as his hand started to go under my skirt, "Let me take care of you, yeah? I know you're tired, you don't have to do anything."
His words gave me butterflies on my stomach. Sex with him was always either gentle and sweet, rough and kinky, or lusty and passionate. Him being cute and gentle was always my favorite one.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and stroked the back of his neck before leaning in to kiss him, as our lips collided and moved in sync, his hand made its way to my underwear. He stroked my clit through the fabric making me gasp and  have goosebumps from head to toe.
"Shh, relax. I'll be gentle." he muttered through the kiss as he felt the wetness on the underwear, he fiddled with the fabric at first, before slowly taking it off of me.
When it was off, he kept it in his pocket and started to trail his thumb over my clit. I shuddered at his touch and he did it over and over again, "Can you tell me what you want, princess?"
I nearly come undone hearing his words, but I managed to look him in the eyes while saying, "Touch me...Please, Harry..."
He smiled and pecked my lips before slowly entering a finger in, while still caressing my clit with his thumb. I held back a moan as I closed my eyes and bit my bottom lip.
"Merlin, you're so wet." he groaned quitely as he went in and out with his finger, and not long after, he added a second finger.
I threw my head back to the bookshelf and couldn't help but let out a little gasp, he started moving faster and faster, it was getting really hard to hold back my moans. When he added a third finger, he knew I was about to moan, because he slammed his lips onto mine.
"F-Fuck..." I moaned quitely through the kiss, his fingers moving in and out frantically, I pulled away and gasped for air.
Suddenly, I felt the knot in my stomach forming, my body was starting to shake, I was close. Harry seemed to realize as he stopped for a second to rest his fingers before going in and out in a frantic pace, his thumb stroking my clit.
"Come for me, baby." he said while unbuttoning my shirt and squeezing my boobs gently.
Not wasting another moment, I bit back a moan as I felt my body completely let go. I let out little whimpers of pleasure as my body jerk and shake a little from the force of the orgasm. When I've relaxed, he gently pulled his fingers out and licked them clean.
"Good girl." he smiled at me and kissed me, letting me taste myself on his tongue, "Do you want more or was that enough for you, my love?"
I panted heavily, still recovering from the orgasm, and looked at him and his bulge. I knew I would have to really fight myself to not moan if we go further, but my body needed him. Badly.
"You deserve some too, Harry. Not just me." I smiled while fumbling with his pants, he raised an eyebrow before smirking lightly.
He understood what I wanted so he quickly took of his pants and underwear, while I completely took off my shirt, leaving me only in my skirt and bra. He picked me up and made me straddle him before taking one of my boobs into his mouth.
I moaned quitely as I tug his hair and let out a sigh of pleasure. He continued sucking on my breast while playing with the other one, before pulling away and looking at me in the eyes, "You're the most beautiful person I've ever met, Y/N."
My body instantly was filled with euphoria hearing that, my cheeks went red as I smiled at him and kissed him. He kissed me back with tongue as he gave his dick a few strokes before gently and slowly entering me.
"O-Oh, fuck...." I pulled away from the kiss and moaned, with our foreheads still touching.
He breathed heavily and continued to thrust himself deeper. When he's fully in me, he paused for a second to take a deep breath, before slowly moving in and out.
"H-Harry..." I rested my hand on his shoulder and clawed his back, we were only getting started and we were already such a moaning mess.
"Y-You feel so good, Merlin..." he moaned, squeezing my ass as he continued his rapid movement.
We were looking into each other's eyes as he moved in and out of me. Both of us sweating and breathing heavily, euphoria and pleasure feeling both our bodies. It wasn't until we heard someone talking that we knew someone was in the shelf next to ours.
"No, that's not the one I'm looking for. Maybe it's in the next shelf."
I widened my eyes and mouthed to Harry, "We're the next shelf!"
He was about to pull out of me but before he could do anything, another voice was heard, "Wait, here it is. Nevermind, we don't have to go to the other shelf, Celia. I got it."
We both took a deep breath of relief and waited for them to leave, when they did, he looked at me and smirked, "Now, where were we?" he started moving in and out of me again. 
Not so long after, he thrusted deep inside me, hitting my g-spot. I had to bury my face on the crook of his neck to hold myself from screaming out of pleasure. I was in absolute bliss. His thrust became faster and harder by the second.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck baby..." I whimpered into his neck, my body jerking from the force of his thrust.
He stroked my back reassuringly and eagerly kissed my neck to calm me down, "Shh, I know, sweetheart. I know."
He started hitting my g-spot over and over again, my body was jerking and shaking from the amount of pleasure I was getting. Little gasps and moans coming out of my mouth, as I feel the knot on my stomach forming again.
"I-I'm close, Harry..." I gasped and my legs tightened the grip on his waist.
He nodded his head and groaned, while pulling away from my neck after successfully making a hickey there, "Me too. Oh fucking hell, love.."
His movement suddenly became fast and hard, he was trying to reach both of our orgasms. My mouth was hung open in a silent scream, he was gasping for air and watching me slowly come building up to my release.
"Beautiful. So fucking beautiful."
With his words, I come undone. I tried my best to moan quitely, as my body convulsed and my thighs shake. I saw stars and I couldn't feel anything else except for pleasure. I never wanted it to end. I was having uncontrollable spams. It was the hardest orgasm I've ever had.
A second after my release, he had his. He buried his face into my chest as he groaned and released inside me. I felt his hot liquid filling me up, making me shudder and jerk slightly. As we were both coming down from our high, he stroked my stomach gently to calm me down, and I stroked his hair.
When we both have relaxed, we looked at each other and couldn't help but smile. He pulled out of me slowly and set me down on my feet, I trembled but I quickly leaned against the shelf so I don't fall down.
"Did you enjoy it, my love?" he said out of breath, while moving a strand of hair from my face.
I nodded my head vigorously and chuckled, "Every second of it, darling." I smiled, "God, I really needed that. Homework has been stressing me out lately."
He smiled and kissed my forehead, "I noticed, princess." he took out my underwear from his pocket and gave it to me, "We should dress up before anyone sees us."
We quickly tidied ourselves up. We made ourselves look like we did not just fuck the shit out of each other as much as we could. I fixed him a bit and he did the same for me, before we both walk away from the shelf hand in hand.
I quickly gathered my stuff that was still on the table before walking out of the library with him, "That was one of the craziest things I've ever done."
He chuckled and shrugged, "Hey, everyone does crazy things from time to time. But you didn't regret it, did you?" he said as he put a bit of my hair at the front, to hide my hickey.
I smiled up at him and shook my head, "Not one bit, Harry."
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calisources · 6 months
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𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒.
All sentences here were taken from different media about possessive love, the thrill of the chase, banter, and competition regarding one's affection. Some have foul language so please beware but most are fun, banter, possessive fun. All of these are made for roleplay purposes. Change names, pronouns, locations as you see fit.
I love you. You’re mine. I’ll kill any bastard who tries to take you from me.
I spend a quarter of every day inside you. 
I have never said this to anyone before.
But the idea of you with child is the most insanely arousing thing I’ve ever imagined.
Your belly all swollen, your breasts heavy, the funny little way you would walk … I would worship you. I would take care of your every need. And everyone would know that I’d made you that way, that you belonged to me.
You want to be free. You also want to be mine. You can't be both.
We can't possess one another.
Just because I can't have you right now, doesn't mean I'm okay with him having you.
I will be good to you, Myst. Please, I promise.
You are mine. And I protect what’s mine.
Of course I won't go alone. I shall take my maid.
No.You will take me.
The purpose of a knight is to protect. Why won’t you let him do his job to me?
I want you all to myself.
I can’t explain to you the joy I feel knowing it’s all mine. That you are all mine, that your body is all mine.
There is something in me that wakes up when I want something, a possession.
God knows he deserved you more than I do. 
Listen well, for you belong to me.
Good grief, you’re such an adorably greedy person.
And when you fall in love with her  just keep in mind that she’s mine. 
 She’s more than you could handle, anyway.
That almost sounds like a challenge.
I don’t need your permission to do anything.
Your hands will touch me and no one else, Meadow. That is final.
You chase off every man that’s ever been interested, and you do it without even trying.
You reject every suitor and yet, you keep entertaining me. I believe you want me too, and you are dying to be touched.
I don't own you, you just belong to me.
You’re my gold, your cunt is my liquid gold. 
I will have your mouth, you will give it to me. Then I will have your spirit, Circe. I will own it. Always.
By the gods you have never been more beautiful than you are right now, spread before me, wrapped in my wool.
Once I take you, you are mine. My woman. No other man can have you.
I do not belong to you, or to anyone else. I will talk to whomever I want, whenever I want.
Not if it’s some ass who thinks he can put his hands on you.
You didn’t have a problem with me acting like a caveman last night.
When it comes to you… I don’t like to share.
Most men prefer to do the eating.
Do you know what passion is?
Most people think it only means desire. Arousal. Wild abandon. But that’s not all. The word derives from the Latin. It means suffering. Submission. Pain and pleasure, Nikki. Passion.
You’re wearing my colors, love.
I’m going to put you on your knees, Ruby. You’re going to hate how much you love it.
He is my king, he is my warrior, he is my husband and I am proud to say above all… he is mine.
You have rare beauty the like I have never seen but you will be more beautiful heavy with my seed.
You are my golden queen. You are my tigress. You are my Circe. 
Never will I allow your gold to be taken from me. Never. Understand this, Circe, and never forget.
Maybe I fell in love with a version of him that didn't exist.
 I would have you right here if you would let me. Fear you? I exalt you. 
You could burn me a thousand times, and I would still want you for my own.
Everything has a price. The price, however, isn't always money.
You’re my scariest hell, You’re my perfect paradise.
Well, I admit my crib is pretty sweet. But a gold cage is still a cage, Harry.
I intend to the last. 
If I win, then you shall be mine. Tonight.
You are so sure of yourself.
The game is simple. The women run, the men chase. If you catch the one with your color. . .well, that’s up to you.
But women have been running all their lives, most men don’t catch that easily.
We are in a maze, lost, and your hand is up my skirt.
Aye, but I don’t hear any complaints. The maze will hide our secret.
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gurugirl · 1 month
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Can you please tell what unicorn!harry and yn are up to? 🙏
dad!harry x nanny!reader
The Unicorn Masterlist
I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF I HAVE NO IDEA BUT YEAH - LITTLE PEEK INTO A MOMENT IN TIME!
Lil smuttyish blurb - 492 words
. .
Well, you live with Harry now. He's made sure of it. He didn't like you going back to your apartment. Ever. And besides, it just made sense because you usually stayed over at his anyway. Even the boys love you and wanted you around.
But at this very moment? You're lying all mushy and soft with your head against his stomach, post-orgasm. You both got home at the same time and the boys are out for a couple more hours so Harry charmed your panties off (as he does) and now you're both in a daze, catching your breaths and strewn about on the sex-scented sheets together. The sheet barely covering his half-hard dick, still wet from having it inside of you only moments before. Which also means you're still wet and probably a bit of a mess down there. But neither of you is in a rush to get it washed off because Harry can see where this is going again as you're staring at the lump under the sheet like there's a treat hidden beneath (there is).
He plucks at the thin fabric and slides it off for you because he knows you want more (you always do). He can see your eyes home in and widen and your lips part as you peek up at him and then back to his fat cock, just lying there so invitingly. Like it deserves to be licked clean (it does). And when he pets the back of your head and pushes just so you know you're invited to indulge and so you do. Grinning wide at the beautiful, heavy dick lying right next to your face you allow your head to be pushed down by his palm and you happily suckle at his tip just like you wanted.
"You wanna clean daddy up, sweet girl?"
And now that he's in your mouth you're not letting up so instead of responding with words you hum a yes and look up at him as you slide your tongue down around him just a little more, his hand still pressing, guiding (because he wants it just as much).
It tastes like salty cum and tangy arousal all mixed up and you smack around him, savoring and gorging on the mouthful that he is. Harry sighs, leaning his head back into the pillow, and lets you take care of him because you're such a good girl and because he's always taking care of you so he grants you permission (like he'd say no) by pushing at you just a little more since he wants a little more.
You're already blissed out and purring as you look up at him again, eyes rounded and glossy and he knows what you're trying to say because Harry knows you better than anyone. He knows you would say thank you, daddy, if you didn't have your mouth occupied like you did. But you do so you can’t.
"You're welcome, baby."
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grapejuicestyless · 4 months
Text
Happier
Harry Styles x fem!reader
Summery: Y/n is not happy, despite the smile etched into her face, and nobody can see that, nobody but Harry, who can’t seem to express his concern in a gentle way.
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“You look happier.”
What am I supposed to say to that? Thank you? I don’t mean to be mean when nobody meant any harm, but it feels so casually cruel for someone to pick up on the way I’ve changed and mistake my spiraling for happiness.
I don’t know the true shape of my face. My cheeks were round most of my life, meant to be kneaded between the fingers of my working class grandmother while she baked in the kitchen, but more recently the skin has fallen from the bone and what was once rolled between wrinkled fingers is tighter to my face as it strangles me from the inside out.
I don’t recognize myself either. Maybe I never did, because even when I search for the girl I once was, I can never seem to find her. I remember running around as a child with my best friend, the grass stains on my jeans and the holes in my sweater from tug of war’s in his backyard. She was happy, even if she looked tired. She was the happiest I’d ever been, but she was so young. She hadn’t found herself yet and maybe that’s what made life so good, the ignorance of the real world and how it would shape her.
Maybe the real me is the person who reaches out to her friends when she misses them, or maybe its the girl who counted down the days to her seventeenth birthday so she could finally relate to the lyrics of Dancing Queen and mean it finally. But maybe it’s the girl who sits in bed staring at the ceiling wondering why she never made it where everyone else was going. Maybe it’s the girl who wished her mother cared just a little bit more to stop comparing her to her “smarter” friends when she was twelve.
So maybe I do look happy, maybe I am happy. Maybe I have never felt happy before and maybe that’s why I feel so conflicted about if I truly am or if I am just projecting it out to seem that way.
“Harry.”
I call into the darkness, wandering the house party in a sweaty costume sticky with splashes of beer on the fabric, only half of the costume I came with.
The hallway is long and winding, but it always feels that way when I’m not exactly sure if I’m going in the right direction.
“Harry?” I call out again, spotting the other half of my costume.
“Y/n.” He smiles with a sigh, like even though the smoke between his fingers is taking off the edge, I’ve just calmed the entire air surrounding him. For me, it’s the same feeling. When he’s near, everything seems to slow down for a moment. After about the thousandth comment on how much better I looked from some friends of friends, he disappeared, and maybe that’s why their integrating looks bother me so much, because theres no hand to hold onto to distract me from myself.
I slide against the wall to sit with him, my eyes finding purchase on the same cracks across the thin hallway as he did, and the warm blunt being lazily passed from his fingers to mine.
“I think you’re rubbing all your glitter onto my pants.” he breathes out casually into the comfortable silence. I feel the tension in my shoulders expand before fading.
“I think it’s in my eyes too.”
“Just when I thought they couldn’t shine any brighter.” Harry lifts his hand to hook his index finger around my chin, smiling like an idiot when he sees my lips curl comfortably around the joint.
“Well, maybe I feel better than usual. It’s finally reflecting back to you.”
I joke, feeling sick as I recall the conversation from before. I look happier, as if to suggest that before I was miserable, and even if they weren’t wrong about that, the fact that anyone could read that without a second glance scared me. How a stranger could read me before I could.
“Well, you look like shit if you do.”
“Ouch, that obvious?”
“If I counted each time you rolled your eyes when someone told you that whole speech about how good you look, I’d run out of fingers.”
Harry laughs as he takes back the weed to finish it off. I’ve already drank more than him, so the sway in my body becomes more noticeable as the burn sears down my throat.
“It’s just so…wrong. I mean, I guess I feel okay, but do I really look good enough for all this praise?” I ask quietly into the night, my knees pressing against my chest as I hug my calves tightly between my sweaty palms.
“I think you’re very pretty, Y/n. You are pretty. But your face is changing and no amount of glitter can cover that up.” He tells me honestly, rubbing out the dying end onto his knee and sighing at the burn.
“If you still believe that then I haven’t used enough glitter.” I try to joke, to brush away the rising bile in my throat and tension in the air.
“You can fool anyone else, but I know you. Even if you’re not who you once were, I still know you because I love you.”
“Well you shouldn’t. I’m a leech. I’ll fucking suck up all the joy from your life until you’re too exhausted to leave.” I smiled at the ground drunkenly, head hung low and my eyes heavy.
“But I do. You’re my best friend and it’s pathetic how you let yourself fall so low.” Harry flicks out the end of the blunt, watching the ashes fall the floor and stain the carpet lining the thin hallway.
“I came to you for comfort, you know. Not to get drilled in a bunny costume.” I roll my eyes, the haze clearing at his bitter remarks.
“Well tough luck, I guess. You look like shit for a girl who everyone here thinks is so happy.” Harry looks at me, his hand moving to wipe away the glitter by my eye.
“I need air.” I stand up, almost stumbling against the faint curling of the carpet at the edges. It’s new and that’s how you can tell, it hasn’t fully sunken into the floor, and it’s such a shame that it’s forever stuck with the glitter from my costume and the ashes of Harry’s joint.
“You need help.”
I stop, and there’s a beat that passes.
“You’re a real asshole when you’re high, you know. I have my own shit, I don’t need to be taking yours too.” I smile at him, but only because he was smiling at me.
“Maybe I am.” He responds plainly, and when he looks the other way, I feel heavier than before, more picked apart than before, more vulnerable than before.
Theres a thousand eyes on my back just waiting for me to crack, like the chip in my tooth from how hard I’m smiling while talking to strangers about my hopeless life. And they all say I look happier.
“But y/n,” Harry calls out for me, and for a moment I believe he might apologize.
“You look happy.”
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reiderwriter · 1 year
Text
♦️There Are No Words Left to Speak ♦️
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Chapter 5 of That's What You Get
Prev Chap || Next Chap
Pairing: Spencer Reid X Fem Reader
Summary: In a panic, you spill your guts to Penelope and receive some much needed advice before your "date" with Reid.
Warnings: None!!
A/N: This one is 4k words long because I absolutely could not help myself 😭 I've has a lot of messages and asks about this series lately, and it's been really encouraging to see! If you like this chapter, please comment or reblog and let me know or come chat with me in my inbox! Happy Reading!!
You can find my masterlist here and the series masterlist here.
"Penelope, I fucked up and I need your advice," you screamed into the room as soon as the door slammed open, startling the other woman as she threw her phone up in surprise. 
"Jesus, Y/N, you're lucky I didn't reach for the all too full can of pepper spray I store in here, oh my god."
"I'm sorry, Pen, I'm just, I'm kinda freaking out, and I need your help."
"Are we going to need wine, or are we going to need ice cream and a chick flick? What kind of problem are we talking here?" she asked from her place at the desk. 
"I married Spencer in Vegas." You said and then clamped your hand over your mouth as you finally let the pressure of the weekends mess seep out of you now that you'd shared your secret. 
"Oh my god, both, we'll do both. We need both, let's go, let's go now."
–X– 
Penelope drove the two of you home, immediately moving into a mothering role as soon as the words left your mouth, and she could see your impending implosion. You were grateful that she didn’t ask you any further questions as you made your way back to her apartment, just turning on the radio to a channel playing 90s pop hits and simply letting you calm down through the fun music. 
When you finally got through her door, she let you get comfortable and then immediately came back with all the things she promised. 
“Okay, I know you’re more a rose girl, but all I have is this really nice white that Derek got me for my last birthday and half a bottle of tequila, and I think it’s better for the both of us if we don’t open the tequila. Also, I have chocolate, cookie dough ice cream, and tissues, and When Harry Met Sally on DVD, I'm ready to be plugged in and played as soon as you say the word.” 
“Penelope, we do not tell you how brilliant you are as often as we should.” 
“While that is true, I’m trying my best not to immediately cave and ask you to spill, so can we please sing my praises after you explain what you mean by saying you married Spencer.” 
“God, Penelope, I don’t know what happened,” you let your head hang in your hands and she immediately moved to sit closer to you, rubbing a hand over your back and getting the tissues ready. 
“We went out drinking, and my mom got in my head earlier in that call I took, and I don’t remember anything and then I woke up and we were in bed together and-” you rambled out, lifting your head up as you tried to explain, but she cut you off quickly there.
“You were in bed together? Did you… you know, bump uglies with Spencer? Do the old in n’ out? Sorry, I’m making this worse, I’ll shut up now,” she said, but you laughed at her enthusiasm, and you felt more of the weekend’s tension leave your body. You knew that you had made the right decision coming to Penelope with this. She always knew how to make you feel better. 
“I don’t know, but it looks like it. TMI but-”
“Hold on, I don’t think I want to know what the Good Doctor is like in bed.” She visibly shuddered, and you let out another shaky laugh. 
“Well considering I remember none of it, you’d be hard pressed to get those details from me. I did wake up handcuffed to the bed, though.” 
“Shut the front door, no you did not!” Penelope’s jaw dropped. “Oh god, I’m almost morbidly curious, but I don’t want to open that can of worms. Sorry, please continue.” 
You took a swig of the wine she poured you and relaxed a bit further into her couch, pulling your legs up under you to find a more comfortable position as you told the rest of your story to Penelope, gaining more confidence with each of her reactions to what you told her. 
“So, now we just need to track down our two witnesses and get the marriage quietly annulled, and we can forget it ever happened.” You could hear the frown in your voice before you realised you were making that kind of expression, and from Penelope’s reaction, you could see that she’d noticed too. 
“Oh.. oh, I know that look. You don’t want the annulment, do you?” 
“Yes! I mean, no! Look, I really don’t know how to answer that right now, it’s just…” you trailed off, and Penelope silently filled your wine glass again, not saying anything and letting you come around at your own pace. 
“Earlier today, after we told Rossi, and before I came running to you, he… he kissed my forehead, and he called me Mrs. Reid, and I really liked it. And I didn’t think about it before, but Reid is nice, and he is good, and he is obviously really smart, and, god  he’d be a great dad, and he took care of me yesterday and today… Penelope, I think I have a crush on my husband.” You gasped out, feeling the weight of your revelation as it hit you straight in the gut. 
“But we talked about it and we’re getting an annulment and now it’s like I fucked up before I really got the chance to let it go anywhere, and what if it’s a mistake? What if I made the world’s greatest fuck up and married a great man in Vegas and then threw it all away a week later?” you raked your hand through your hair quickly, trying to ignore the tears forming quickly in your eyes. 
“Oh my god, sweetie, it’s going to be okay… You’re going to have to trust me when I tell you that it’s going to be okay…” she patted you on the back and you let the tears fall down a bit, quickly dabbing them away with the now balled up tissue in your hand. 
“I don’t know if I can, Pen…” you tried to smile up at her, but you could feel your lips wobbling and you let your head hang again before you could let out a choked sob. 
“No, nonononoonono, listen to me… Okay, promise you won’t hate me after I say this?” She said, squishing your cheeks between her hands as she made you look up into her eyes. 
“I pwomise,” you sniffed out, voice muffled by her strong grip. She let you go then, content that she had your attention. 
“I know for a fact that the boy is as infatuated with you as you are with him because… because I saw you two.” She stopped there to watch your reaction, but you froze, so she continued.
“You… you called me from wherever you guys were out in Vegas, mumbled some words over the phone and then sent me a picture of a brochure with an address on it, and then when I turned up it was a wedding chapel and you were getting married.” She winced out those last words, and you gasped at the confession. 
“You were one of the witnesses! Penelope!” You pointed an accusatory finger at her, but it was half-hearted. You knew that you were stubborn enough while sober. You certainly wouldn’t have been persuaded out of something you obviously wanted while blackout drunk. 
“I know, I know, I’m sorry, but you guys were just too cute! He was giving you all these small kisses on your forehead and on your cheeks, and you looked like innocent kids giddy and high on love, and I didn’t want to bring you back down to earth. You looked so happy, and I do not make it a habit to get in the way of my friends’ happiness.” 
“Penelope, why didn’t you say anything?” You groan out, sounding a bit like a petulant teenager who has just discovered her mom threw out a shirt she hadn’t worn in years. 
“I wanted to, but I was told not to…” she winced away. “And before you ask, I won’t tell you who else was there! Just know it was someone else who also loves both of you and would’ve pulled you two out of there. No questions asked if they thought you were making a stupid decision!” 
You let the revelations sink in, one by one. Penelope was there. Reid couldn’t keep his lips off of you. The other witness thought you two were good together. It almost didn’t surprise you when you started giggling, finding humour in the situation at least. 
“Oh my god, Penelope, I got married in Vegas to my coworker. And I think I’m in love with him now.” You were in a fit of giggles now, and Penelope hesitantly joined in at first. 
“Yeah, I suppose it is funny when you put it that way.” 
“God, what am I going to do? How am I going to face him from now on?” You pulled yourself together again and faced Penelope again, hoping that she would have actual answers for your very rhetorical question. 
“Well, at least we have a couple of days off now. You don’t have to see him again until we go to work.” 
“No, we have a date tomorrow,” you said matter-of-factly. “Appointment, really, he’s reading some books on alcohol induced memory loss tonight, and then I’m going over to his place to see if any of it can help us fill in the blanks.” 
“Oh god, you’re going to talk books with Reid. That’s practically as romantic as it gets for him. No wonder he wifed you up.” You playfully kicked her leg, and she laughed again. “Okay, so no avoidance, okay. Maybe you could put the moves on him? Try to recreate that scene with the handcuffs. Who knows what might happen.” She wiggled her eyebrows at you then, and you did your best not to once again be overcome by a fit of giggles.
“Okay, enough of my romantic problems. I was promised When Harry Met Sally and that ice cream has probably melted, so let’s get to it.” 
–X–
You braced yourself at the apartment door as you psyched yourself up to knock. As promised, you’d been greeted in the morning by a text from Spencer with his address and a proposed time to meet. He’d suggested 5pm, and you’d agreed, but here you were 20 minutes early, probably looking overdressed and over eager to spend time with your coworker/ husband/ soon to be former husband, maybe. 
You’d left Penelope’s apartment that morning, having had an impromptu sleepover, happy that you’d at least confirmed your own feelings. You’d taken a taxi to collect your car, then spent the rest of your time at home overthinking and overpreparing. 
You’d put on a dress and some make-up, and you were almost regretting the decision now you were on his doorstep, wondering what he’d think. You worked one of the toughest jobs in the world together, and you knew that he’d seen you completely black and blue after going blow for blow with unsubs in the past. Would he think this sudden effort was weird? You tried not to pace, knowing that your footsteps in the hall would alert him to your presence, but you couldn’t bring yourself to knock just yet. 
You checked your phone again. 4:45. You couldn’t spend another fifteen minutes out here overthinking, so you finally just pushed ahead and knocked. Almost as if he had been waiting on the other side of the door this entire time, Reid answered immediately, not even letting you get a third rap in before he was there standing in front of you. 
“Hi,” you said, standing there awkwardly with your hand still up, ready to knock again. 
“Hey,” he replied, smiling at you. 
You felt his eyes trail down your body, taking in your appearance. The dress you’d chosen wasn’t particularly special, just a mid-length tiered dress with bow straps. The weather was getting chillier so you’d layered it over a plain turtleneck, enjoying the added bonus of not having to conceal down your neck to mask the love bites he’d lavished upon you only a few nights prior. 
You looked at him as well, and you were pleasantly surprised by his casual wear. He was more dressed down than he was in the office, but not by much. He was still wearing slacks, and a button down shirt as well, but he’d thrown a beaten up CalTech sweater over the top of them, and he looked so cosy you wanted to bury your head in his chest. He was wearing his glasses, and you were so thankful for that, as you forgot how well they suited him, fitting him perfectly. 
“You’re early.” He said, finally breaking the silence between the two of you, drawing you out of the trance he’d kept you in while you took in the sight of him. 
“Yeah, I guess I just overestimated how long it was going to take to get here. Is that okay?” 
“Yeah, yeah, it’s great, totally fine. Come in.” He moved his body to the side slightly so you could enter the door, but kept his outer arm pressed against the door so you had to duck under it, brushing past him as you went. The small contact made your entire body buzz, your heartrate picking up as you willed yourself to act natural. 
“The food should be here any minute.” He smiled as he followed you back into his apartment. “I wanted it to arrive before you got here so I could surprise you.” You turned around to face him, and you could hear the bashfulness in his voice as he made the admission. 
“Sorry for ruining the surprise,” you smiled up at him. “What did you order?” 
“I remembered you mentioned that Korean streetfood place a while back that does those spicy rice cakes and kimbap rolls, so I got us some of that. Is that okay?” 
“Sounds perfect.” You were touched that he even remembered the conversation when you yourself couldn’t even think of when it might have happened. He turned and walked further into the apartment, and you followed him this time, finally looking around and taking it all in. 
The walls were obviously lined with bookshelves, and there were books laying around in piles everywhere. The walls were painted a dark colour, which made the space feel calming, almost more intimate, and sunlight was streaming in from the open window on the back wall. 
“Sorry, it’s not much. Take a seat wherever, and I’ll grab those books I was talking about.” 
You took a seat on the couch and watched him trail around the room, picking up books from several shelves and stacks. 
“Okay, this is all of them. So the main takeaway is that it usually takes two weeks to fully recover memories from alcohol induced blackouts.” He explained, bringing you a stack at least eight books high. 
“Spencer, did you read all of these last night?” You asked. 
“Yeah, I said I would, I thought it would help.” 
“Spencer,” you took his hand into yours as he set the books on the floor and flopped down to the couch beside you. “I really appreciate you putting in all this effort to help us, but you could’ve just come home and relaxed, you know. Our case was long and tough, and now all of this, you deserve a break.” You stroked your thumb over the back of his hand, trying to make the gesture calm and reassuring. 
“I know, I wanted to do this. I want to remember what happened between us,” he whispered the words softly, not needing to fill the space with much sound as you’d crept closer and closer together since he’d returned. 
“So, uh, two weeks then, is that it, we just have to wait for the memories to return?” you asked quietly, letting go of the small moment you’d shared to get back to the task at hand. 
“It seemed so, but there are some other more general tips we could implement that could help us piece together what happened. We might at least be able to figure out who our witnesses were.” 
You felt almost guilty then, but you kept your mouth shut. You’d decided the night before that you wouldn’t tell Reid about Penelope. At least not yet. You wanted the time first to see if he could possibly feel the same way about you before you worked up the courage to let him in on what you had learnt. 
“Yeah, I’m open to try anything. Within reason, that is.” 
“Great! I was thinking at first that maybe we could do a cognitive interview, but as we only have each other to work with, I thought that might make some of our answers more biased and not garner effective results. But we could still try to jog our memories by working out some of the same emotions, doing some things we could have done that night, and seeing if any of it rings a bell?” 
“Some of the things we did that night?” 
“Yeah,” he repled. 
“Like… like make out or get handcuffed to a bed?” You enjoyed watching the flush creep up his neck, and his eyes go wide as he struggled to backtrack on that one. 
“No, no! I mean, unless you want to, or you think it would help?” It was your turn to be left speechless, your mouth suddenly not complying with your brain as you begged yourself to respond somehow. All you could muster was a glance down at his lips that lingered a bit too long, your body slowly creeping forward. 
He noticed and moved closer towards you as well, letting his hand grasp your waist as you got caught in his atmosphere. 
“It’s worth a try, right? To regain our memories.” He supplied you with the words, letting you stay silent as your lips grew closer and closer together, seconds away from taking your breath away forever. 
A loud rap at the door and a shout of “delivery” had the two of you suddenly bouncing away from each other, Reid scrambling to the door to collect the food, while you stood up awkwardly and tried to pretend there was something really interesting on his bookshelf that had caught your attention all of a sudden. 
For the Nth time in so many days, you found yourself trying to convince your heart to beat a little quieter, and you managed to get yourself under control as he returned with the food.
“I’m sorry, I lost track of time…” he trailed off as you nodded, joining him back at the couch as he began unpacking the food. 
“It’s totally fine, we should eat anyways, trust me when I say this stuff doesn’t taste even half as good cold.” You smiled at him, but it didn’t go quite to your eyes. You really wanted to kiss him, and you were really doing your best to control your disappointment, not wanting to show off how desperate for him you were. 
“Well, you’re in luck, because you now get to witness one of my only flaws,” he said, fishing out two sets of chopsticks from the delivery bag. “I am absolutely terrible with chopsticks.” 
You giggled at him and grabbed the pair he offered you, letting out a dramatic fake gasp. “And you only tell me after we get married? That’s it, I want a divorce,” you laugh, and the two of you settle down into a comfortable silence as you begin your meal. 
–X– 
Two hours later, and you’re still no closer to locking lips with the man than you were earlier. You’d had a nice time talking with him over the food, both of you sitting like kids on the floor as you ate over his coffee table. He’d told you about a Korean film festival he’d attended a few years back, one of many international film festivals he’d been to, and you sat and listened, in awe of the way his eyes lit up when he talked about something that excited him. You hoped that one day, he’d talk about you in that same way. 
You helped him clean up and settled back onto the couch, where he’d mentioned having a copy of one of the films that had since been subtitled, and you ended up in another movie marathon.
The movie was good, but his presence next to you was even better. He’d stretched out his arms on the couch behind you, letting you snuggle up into his side as you pulled your legs up and under you, screwing yourself up in a comfortable little ball, burrowing into him for warmth. He was a fire beside you, and you wished you were bold enough to push further into him, to drag your hands across his skin and feel even more of him, continuing the exploration from earlier. But you weren’t, and, honestly, you were tired, so you let yourself sit peacefully beside him, touching but not much, as you were lulled to sleep by the sounds of the TV. 
It was pitch black outside when you finally cracked your eyes open again, but he was still there next to you on the couch. The movie had been turned off, and so had the TV, and there was a blanket now wrapped around your legs, so he had obviously moved, but he had also come back to you. You shifted your head up to look at him and smiled. He’d picked up another book from who knows what shelf and was reading slowly so as not to wake you with the movements of his hand as he traced down the page. Your head had moved from his chest to his lap, and he held the book off to the side in one hand, his other resting protectively over your waist. He was so engrossed by his book that he hadn’t even realised you’d moved and that you were awake until you spoke to him. 
“Spencer? What time is it?” you asked, your voice thick with sleep. 
“It’s 11:30. You fell asleep during the movie and you looked like you could use the sleep.” 
“Wow, what a way to tell a girl she doesn’t look so good,” you laughed at him as he pouted down at you. 
“I didn’t mean that. Y/N, you look beautiful today. You look beautiful everyday.” 
You lifted yourself up from his lap, one hand braced on either side of his legs on the couch as you bought yourself eye-to-eye with him, your chests close enough to touch if you took a big breath in. Instead, yours were shallow as you looked up at him through heavy eyes. 
“Thank you, Spencer.” You whispered, silently begging him to close the space between the two of you. But he didn’t, instead, clearing his throat and putting his book down, breaking your eye contact. 
“I should be getting home now. It’s pretty late.” You said, standing up from the couch. He followed you up and around as you started collecting your things and organising the space you’d occupied. 
“Y/N it’s late, and you’re tired. I can’t let you drive home like that. An estimated 30% of road accidents occur due to sleep deficiency, you know.” 
“It’s fine, I don’t want to get a taxi and just leave my car here and then have to come back in the morning. I’ll be fine driving,” you said, but he softly took the keys out of your hands as you grabbed them from your bag. 
“Stay here tonight.” He said, less of a suggestion than an already established fact. You looked up at him and knew there was no changing his mind, but he continued anyway. 
“I have a spare toothbrush and some old clothes you can probably use as pajamas, and it’s not like we haven’t shared a bed before. Maybe…maybe waking up next to each other again will help jog our memories, too. We only have until the end of the week, right?” 
He looked at you expectantly, and you let out a little sigh and nodded your head, letting him guide you away to the bedroom and back into sleeping in his arms. 
--×--
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944 notes · View notes
catboywizard · 3 months
Text
heyyy hot takes at 4am time but like what is wrong with people?? we just received really huge awful news, let people have some time to process???
i just saw someone saying anyone upset about the neil gaiman thing because of what it means for good omens, something they loved deeply, is a “fucking monster”
like, good for you for never having anything you love be revealed to be made by an awful person, i guess?
of course we should be supporting and believing the victims, but people can be upset about things for more than one reason? and talking about one of those things doesn’t negate the other? (like right now, i’m specifically talking about the situation in the context of assholes online acting like they’re so much better then fans who are upset, and that doesn’t mean i think we shouldn’t be centering the victims and what they’ve gone through)
it took me a really long time to (mostly) get over harry potter because it was a huge part of me and something i cared about very deeply. even as a victim of jkr’s vitriol myself. now im at the point where thinking about the situation only hurts a little bit, but it took me like a year or even longer to get there. the neil gaiman news is less than 24 hours old at this point.
just, be nicer to good omens fans right now please. mourning something you loved so much it felt like a part of you doesn’t make you automatically selfish.
and if this kind of thing hasn’t happened to you yet, just know that any human is capable of terrible things like this, and that means any of your favorite creators. if one of them ever gets revealed to be a horrible person, i hope people are nicer to you about it then they are being right now.
note: i also saw a couple people saying stuff like “well yall should have dropped him ages ago when he was revealed to be a zionist/be creepy towards younger fans/write women characters really badly/etc.” and like yeah, that’s not great, but i didn’t know any of that stuff? i feel like a lot of discourse would be solved if people just remembered that the worlds a big place and just cause you know something doesn’t mean everyone does. it’s not a moral failing to have never been informed about something (also, i haven’t personally found any actual evidence of him being a zionist, just people claiming he is)
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rosesareredrosa · 1 month
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theo nott x harrys twin based off of scared of my guitar by olivia rodrigo where like since shes a slytherin people dont rly like her and are rude and she and harry dont talk at all and she lies to theo saying shes ok but he finds her diary and finds out everything and he comforts her
You are NOTT Nothing
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Theo Nott x fem reader
w/c: 1371
Being Harry Potter's twin sister meant living in his shadow, but being sorted into Slytherin meant living in isolation. I’d spent years pretending the whispers and the cold shoulders didn’t bother me, but the truth was, it hurt more than I could ever admit. I was the black sheep, the one who didn’t fit in Gryffindor like everyone thought I should. And worse, I wasn’t even accepted by my own housemates.
I could feel the stares on my back as I walked through the common room. The Slytherins watched me with narrowed eyes, some with curiosity, others with disdain. I wasn’t one of them, not really. I wasn’t the sharp-tongued, cunning Slytherin they expected. I was just Y/N Potter, the oddity.
But the worst part was that Theo was part of their group—the popular ones, the ones who ruled Slytherin with confidence and charisma. Theodore Nott, with his quiet intensity, was different from the others, but he was still one of them. He spent his time with Draco, Pansy, Blaise, Mattheo, and Lorenzo, the group that everyone either feared or admired.
I always felt out of place around them. Draco’s sharp wit, Pansy’s biting remarks, Blaise’s aloofness, Mattheo’s mischievous grin, and Lorenzo’s easy charm—they all made me feel like I didn’t belong. And Theo? Theo was the only one who ever seemed to notice me, the only one who looked at me without judgment. But even then, he was distant, part of a world I could never touch.
I’d gotten good at pretending it didn’t bother me. I’d perfected the art of smiling and nodding, of pretending everything was fine when inside, I was crumbling. I didn’t let anyone see the real me—not even Theo.
I’m scared of my own guitar, of all the things it says I am, I scribbled in my diary one night, reflecting on the lyrics that had been running through my mind. The song reminded me of how terrified I was of the expectations placed on me, how scared I was of not living up to them, of not being enough. Of all the things I know I’m not, I added, my heart aching with the weight of the words.
It’s like the strings know the truth, even when I lie to myself, I wrote, feeling the familiar lump in my throat. I hated how vulnerable I felt, how every time I tried to express myself, it felt like I was revealing too much. I’m scared that if I play, everyone will hear what I’m trying so hard to hide.
One day, I was sitting in the library, tucked away in a corner where no one could see me. I was supposed to be studying, but my mind was elsewhere. My diary lay open in front of me, the pages filled with my fears and frustrations, the things I could never say out loud.
Just as I was about to write something, I heard footsteps approaching. I quickly closed the diary, my heart racing as Theo rounded the corner, his expression unreadable.
“Y/N,” he said quietly, his eyes searching mine.
I tried to smile, but it felt forced. “Theo. What are you doing here?”
“I’ve been looking for you,” he replied, his gaze flickering to the closed diary on the table. “I... I found your diary in the common room the other day.”
My heart dropped. “You read it?”
He nodded, his expression pained. “I didn’t mean to invade your privacy, but... I couldn’t just ignore it. Y/N, why didn’t you tell me how you were feeling?”
I looked away, shame flooding through me. “Because you’re part of their world, Theo. You’re with Draco, Pansy, Blaise, and the others. You wouldn’t understand.”
He stepped closer, his voice soft but firm. “I’m with them, yes, but that doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. I’ve seen how they treat you, how everyone treats you. And it’s wrong. You don’t have to go through this alone.”
I shook my head, tears welling up in my eyes. “You don’t get it, Theo. I’m not like them. I don’t belong here, not in Slytherin, not anywhere. I’m just... nothing.”
Theo’s expression hardened, and before I could react, he reached out and took my hand in his. His touch was gentle, but there was a strength in it that made my heart skip a beat.
“You are not nothing,” he said fiercely. “You’re Y/N Potter, and you’re more than just Harry’s twin. You’re brave, and strong, and you’ve been dealing with more than anyone should have to. I hate seeing you like this, and I hate that you feel like you have to hide it from me.”
The tears I had been holding back finally spilled over, and I looked down, unable to meet his eyes. “I don’t want to be a burden.”
“You’re not a burden,” Theo insisted. “You never were. You mean something to me, Y/N. I know I’m part of that group, but I’m not like them. I care about you, and I want to help you.”
I took a deep breath, the words bubbling up in my chest, words I’d been too scared to say out loud. But looking into Theo’s eyes, I knew I could trust him. I had to let him in.
“I’m scared, Theo,” I admitted, my voice trembling. “I’m scared of everything. I’m scared of my own thoughts, of what they say about me when I’m alone. I’m scared that I’ll never be good enough for anyone, not for Slytherin, not for Harry, not even for myself.”
I could feel his grip on my hand tighten, his eyes softening as I continued.
“I’m scared that if I open up, if I let anyone see who I really am, they’ll hate me. I’m scared that I’m not strong enough to be who everyone thinks I should be. I’m scared that I’m nothing, Theo, that I’ll never be more than just the shadow of someone else.”
Theo stepped closer, his other hand gently cupping my cheek, forcing me to look at him. “Y/N, listen to me. You are not nothing. You’re not a shadow, and you’re not alone in this. You’re everything that matters to me. I know it’s hard to believe, but you’re worth so much more than you think. And you don’t have to pretend with me. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.”
I stared at him, my vision blurred by tears. “But what if you see all the things I’m scared of? What if you see me for what I really am, and you realize I’m not worth it?”
Theo’s thumb brushed away a tear that had escaped down my cheek. “I already see you, Y/N. And I promise you, you are worth it. Every fear, every doubt, every single thing you’re scared to show, I’m here for all of it. You don’t have to hide from me. I’m not scared of who you are. I’m not going to run.”
Something inside me broke, the walls I had built up around myself crumbling as I let out a sob, stepping forward into his arms. He held me tightly, his embrace warm and secure, and I let myself fall into it, let myself believe that maybe, just maybe, I wasn’t alone after all.
“It’s okay,” Theo murmured, his voice soothing as he stroked my hair. “I’m here, Y/N. You’re not alone anymore. You don’t have to be scared. I’ve got you.”
I clung to him, my tears soaking into his robes as I let out everything I had been holding back. Theo held me through it all, never letting go, never pulling away. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I wasn’t alone, like I wasn’t just the shadow of someone else.
I had Theo, and in that moment, that was enough.
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patrophthia · 2 years
Text
love is sour grapes | theo. nott
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pairing: theodore nott x hufflepuff!reader
genre: fluff, angst (if you squint), unrequited love but not really, everyone is an idiot, self indulgent, not beta read.
word count: 5.9K
originally posted on ao3 on: 06/28/2022
"Uhm— would you like to—"
He turned to me calmly, the rest of his appearance devoid of emotions.
"—go out sometimes?" I finished. "As a Date?"
One, two, three beats passes and all Theodore did was look at me. No answer. No emotions. No words. Nothing.
Or Theodore is a quiet piece of shit and that leads to miscommunication and complicated feelings
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Theodore Nott. The one constant thought that has been running through my head way too often for my liking. He was handsome, quiet, smart, lanky in all the right ways and never seemed to be engaged in a conversation —or at least one where he was talking instead of just listening and listening and listening.
Talking to him had always been one of my goals, it shouldn't have, really, it shouldn't. But somehow I had found myself more than just infatuated with him. 
Theodore was an observant person, if he noticed me studying him, he never confronted me about it. 
But, as my friend says it, Theodore Nott is sour grapes. Or, in better words, love is sour grapes. If this even was love that is. 
"I think you should just talk to him," Hermione says kindly. "I still don't think that he would be good for you but if you fancy him that much then go ahead." 
"If you want a death wish that is," Ron snickered. "Honestly, can't you have picked a better guy to fancy? I mean— Nott? Of all people."
"Do you want me to fancy Malfoy instead? Would that make you happy," I quipped, hearing Hermione hide a laugh between closed lips. "Or god forbid, you." 
Ron face contorted to one of offense. "I'm notthatbad." 
"Yeah sure," I murmured, with no malice. And turned to Harry who had been quiet about the situation ever since he found out. "What do you think?" 
Harry shrugged, looking startled. "I don't know," He said first, and then. "I think you need someone better than Nott. You're friendly and thoughtful—" he paused hesitantly. "—and you're quite awfully pretty." 
"Thank you, Harry." My eyes fell downwards with no real intention. I was none of those things. "But I don't think he'd agree." 
"What does it matter if he agrees," Hermione said loudly. "Harry's right. You're all of those things. It's his loss if he doesn't go out with you. You're fit, incredibly so. I would be happy if someone like you were to ever fancy me."
If Ron had a reaction to those words, neither Hermione nor Harry noticed. 
"Well," I said as a group of Slytherin walked into the Potions classroom. Potions would be starting any minute now, and I needed to head into class before Snape does. "I'll keep that in mind. If all fails, I'll just have to marry you, Mione." 
With a final smile, I bid them a quick goodbye and made my way into class. The three of them heading to which ever direction they needed to be. 
The class quickly starts, and Snape wasted no time in assigning me a potion to make. Invigoration Draught. The potion that energizes the drinker. How fun.
The ingredients were mostly easy to obtain. Peppermint, Honeywater, Stewed Mandrake then there's Dried billywig sting: my biggest nightmare.
I was only so tall and the shelves where the ingredients were stored stood so so high. I would've used a stool had it been free to use, but a Slytherin had already been occupying it and it would be rude if I were to take it away from them.
There was a cough behind my back, and then, a hand reached; over me and towards the exact thing I needed. Dried billywig sting: my new biggest enemy.
The person pulled back —jar filled with billywig in hand, and stood still as I turned to them. The jar had a decent amount of billywig in it, if they needed it I could still manage to ask for just enough for my potion. That is if they were kind enough to let me have some.
"Could I—" I paused mid-turn. There stood Theodore Nott in all his glory. Dark eyes, dark hair and facial features that looked like every part of him was chosen by Aphrodite herself, watching me with a raised eyebrow. "—uhm, could I have a few of those? I needed it for my potion but I couldn't reach it."
Theodore blinked once, looking unfazed and handed the jar over.
I blinked twice the time he did, opening up the jar; intending on taking out a few and handing it back over when he stopped me.
"I don't need it."
His voice.
"You don't?" I find myself asking, trying not to breathe too loud or to forget how to even breathe in the first place.
Theodore shook his head once. And reached up for something else. Had he seen me struggle and had gotten it just for me?
"Thank you," I tell him. Theodore nodded once, accepting it as it is. I think you should just talk to him. Goddamn it, Granger. "Uhm— would you like to—"
He turned to me calmly, the rest of his appearance devoid of emotions.
"—go out sometimes?" I finished. "As a Date?"
One, two, three beats passes and all Theodore did was look at me. No answer. No emotions. No words. Nothing.
Whether he was scrutinizing me or not, I didn't know. What I do know is that I was wrong and stupid. And my friends were wrong too.
He needed more than me. I might be friendly and kind and maybe quite awfully pretty. But Theodore needed more than me.
"You know what." I cleared my throat, smiling. "Forget I said anything. Have a good day, Nott."
•••
I had been down lately. My friends noticed that. Even Harry and Ron noticed it and they were as daft as they come. Whenever they asked me what was wrong I find myself telling them that I was just stressed over my O.W.Ls.
Which I was. But it was mostly a lie to cover up something I was more upset about. I had idiotically asked Theodore out and now I have to face the consequences of being rejected.
I think —in some ways— him having not even say 'no' or have given a clearer answer was more upsetting then if he had just said no out loud.
It was stupid of me to get my hopes up and think that anything else would've happened. It was stupid for me to even think I was in his league.
It was also late. I hated walking back to the common rooms in these hours but it was my fault for procrastinating my essay until the night before it was due so I had to rush the entire thing in an hour in the library. I had only hoped that Umbridge wouldn't punish me for being out pass curfew.
I had one more hall left to turn before I reached the Hufflepuff's barrels when someone shouted out my surname, halting me in my place.
Fast pace footsteps approached and then, donning from head to toe in pink was Umbridge. Fuck.
"What do you think you're doing out of your dorm at this time?" She asked quickly, her toad like face twitching with irritation.
"I was in the library and lost track off time," I quickly confessed. "I'm so sorry. My dorm's close by and I—"
"It was my fault professor." His voice. "I’d asked for her help and lost track of time. She was trying to head back before curfew but it seems like her efforts were to no avail. I can only hope you would excuse her and blame me for my faults."
Umbridge looked baffled. He talked? Theodore talked? She made that annoying noise that she can't seemed to get rid off. "Well." her voice laced with false kindness.
"I see no point in deducting any points." She then turned to me. "But I will be expecting to see you tomorrow for separating yourself from help at a time as late as this. Merlin knows, it's dangerous for a girl to wander alone at this time."
"Just me?" I asked, slightly confused.
Her eyes flashed with annoyance. "Do you expect Mister Nott here to be punished for wanting to make sure you got back to your dorm safe?"
That wasn’t what he— okay. Fine. Whatever.
"Now, go off," she said with a wave of her hand. "And Theodore, would you be so kind as to walk her back? I don't want to know the troubles she might cause when I let her out my sight."
Theodore nodded, doing as he was told and took a step forward. He looked behind his shoulders, his eyes meeting mine and tilted his head slightly: signaling that we should leave now before it gets worse.
I avoided Umbridge's eyes and stepped forward, trailing after Theodore. Detention. All because I was too lazy to finish my essay any other time I had.
I think I feel my eyes water. I think it feels harder to breathe. I don't know for sure how I feel exactly despite dejected and disappointed with myself.
If I had just made one different choice, I wouldn't have to have detention with the one professor known to physically harm the students. And to top it off, being walked back to my common room by the boy who recently rejected me whilst bottling up my feelings about everything I did wrong.
"You don't have to actually walk me back." I paid no heed to the crack of my voice. Theodore does though. "It's late." I pointed out the obvious. "You should go."
Theodore glanced at me quickly. His look was so quick that I suspected he had planned to only spare me a second of his time. But something about me, something about how vulnerable I must've looked, had him pausing.
"I shouldn't." He said slowly, his tone so attentively that it made me think that he had saw something in me that I never did. "I can't leave you."
"You can." I don't think I can handle being near him any longer, not when he was studying me so cautiously. "It's only a few steps away, I can assure you I'll be fine."
Theodore eyes flickered down the corridor quickly, finally tearing themselves away from me and looked forward, continuing towards the direction of my common room.
When we finally reached where we needed to be. Theodore stood back watching as I tapped the barrels carefully.
I looked over my shoulder once the path opens up. Smiling slightly when I found his eyes on me. "Thank you for taking the blame, Theo. You didn't have to and you did and spared me way too many house points. I really appreciate it."
He made a noise of acknowledgment, taking my word as it is. And then, as he was about to step away. "Goodnight."
•••
I think I hate life. I might be wrong but life sucks. Especially when you have to repeatedly write the same sentence over and over again with a magic quill that tears through your skin.
That can't have been a legal source of punishment but Umbridge made the rules so it was no use fighting her about it.
My hand hurts. Holy fuck, does it hurt. I don't even have to glance down at it for me to see my skin burning red, bleeding slightly. Curved out in the sentence. I will not be out pass curfew. 
"You alright there?" Came a voice. 
I looked up quick and abruptly, sure that I'll get whiplash from my actions; to find George Weasley watching me with interest. I smiled, subconsciously hiding away my hand. "I'm fine." 
"You sure?" He followed up. "You don't look too good."
I nodded, trying to look as reassuring as possible. "I'm fine, just got a paper cut is all." 
He fixes me a look of disbelief but let it slides. "You should go," he said with a small smile. "I think Ron's looking for you? Something about slimey snakes and what not." 
"Oh." The sound slipped out. "Thank you, I'll go find him." 
It was weird to see George without Fred but I decided that I didn't want to know why. They were probably setting up a prank and I had walked right through it. 
Bidding George a goodbye. I continued down the corridor, turned the corridor and found the trio standing by with Draco Malfoy, Blaise Zabini, and Theodore Nott by their sides. This can't be good. 
Is this what George referred to when he said Ron was looking me about some slimey snakes? 
"There she is," Malfoy said with mild annoyance. "We've been looking for you." 
"You have?" My eyes drifted to Hermione but she only shrugged, looking as clueless as I was. "Why?" 
Malfoy took a steps towards me. "You've been with Professor Umbridge?" 
"Yes." I nodded. "Why?" 
"Did she give you the quill?" 
What was he playing at? Why was he interrogating me? "Yes." I repeated. "Why?" 
Zabini rolled his eyes and step up, seemingly having enough of Malfoy's dramatics. "Here." He handed out a bottle. "It's Murtlap essence. Suppose to help you with the cuts. Nott made it for you." 
"He did?" I asked, taking the bottle of Murtlap essence from Zabini's hand. I turned to look at Theodore, finding his eyes glued to my bleeding hand that was grasping the bottle. Jerking my hand back, I smiled, thanking him. "Thank you for this, I really appreciate and for uhm— thanks again for covering for me last night." 
Everyone —all but Theodore and I— brows raised upwards, surprised. So they didn't know about what had happened last night.
Theodore showed no outwards reaction, having just watch me with a straight face and patient eyes. Then he turned to Zabini and tilted his head slightly. Zabini seemingly understood, slapped a hand over Malfoy's shoulder and with a goodbye, steered the blond boy away. 
"Bloody hell," Ron said exasperatedly. "Did that really happen?" 
"Nott made you Murtlap essence?" Hermione asked more to herself than anyone else. "How did he even know you needed it?" 
"I—" I stopped, glancing at my hand. "—I was out pass curfew and Umbridge caught me. Nott took the blame for it. I think Umbridge was too surprised with hearing him talk to properly acknowledge that he too was out of the dorms pass curfew. She said she won't take away any house points but gave me detention as a punishment." 
"That's all?" Hermione said. "Why would Nott take the fall for it and then proceed to make Murtlap essence for you if there wasn't anything in it for him?" 
"I don't know," I told her, shrugging. "He also walked me back to my common room and wouldn't leave me when I insisted otherwise." 
"Do you think." Ron started. "Maybe that Nott fancies you?" 
"No." I was quick to shake my head in disagreement. "He's doesn't. He's made that clear already." 
"He has?" Harry asked loudly, brows knitted together. 
"Yeah," I murmured. "That day I talked to the three of you. I asked him during class if maybe we could go out on a date sometimes and he didn't say anything. Not a yes. Not a no. Nothing." 
"That's terrible," said Hermione sympathetically. "Honestly, what kind of person rejects someone then proceed to do things as if they cared for them." 
"Hermione," said Harry cautiously, eyes shifting between me and her. "I don't think that does anything to soothe her nerves." 
"Sorry." Hermione blinked in realization. "It's just— you deserve better. I don't understand a thing Nott's doing and I don't want you to get hurt in the process." 
"He could be figuring out his feelings," Ron suggested making Hermione shoot a sharp glare his direction. Ron tsked. "I'm just pointing it out." 
"Well it's not helping." Hermione said in an obvious tone. Her eyes drifted down to my hand, scanning the words then looked back up. "I think you should head back and take care of your hand. You don't want it to scar now, do you?" 
I nodded, waving. "I'll see you at dinner?"
Hermione let out an agreeing hum and went on her way, Ron pestering her from behind. Harry hadn't moved though, looking at me with furrowed brows. "Could I maybe have some of your Murtlap essence?"
"Yeah." I handed it over. "I didn't know you had to endure Umbridge as well."
"Didn't think it was important to mention." He pulled out an empty ink pot from his bag and twisted it open, pouring just enough essence to not overflow it. Harry put the cap back on and handed it back over. "Don't tell Hermione or Ron, will you? I don't want to be a bother." 
" 'course." I smiled. "I won't tell anyone." 
•••
What are the chances that I get caught being out pass curfew twice in the same week. Pretty fucking high because I was once again being called out late at night. 
Two sets of foot steps stops before me and it took me roughly five seconds to realize just how grave the situation was. Draco Malfoy stood tall and smug with Hannah Abott by his side looking tired —if a little irritated by Malfoy's presence. 
"What are you doing out, badger?" Malfoy asked. 
"I was heading back from the kitchens." Malfoy made a face and glanced down at my outfit that looked way too overdressed to be heading down to the kitchens. 
"Are you sure?" 
"Yes." It was clear that I was caught in a lie. Goddamn you, Radiohead concert. "I must've lost track of time." 
Hannah looked like she wanted to say something but bit her tongue. Not wanting any of her words to be counted as it being biased just because I was her dorm mate. 
And then, as I waited to hear Malfoy state just how many points he wanted to take away from my house. He said with annoyance, "you can go." Unfazed to the look of surprise that showed up on both mine and Hannah's faces. "Tell Nott he owes me one." 
•••
I don't think my head could —or will ever fully comprehend "tell Nott he owes me one." I don't know why exactly but that sentence feels way more ominous than it ought to be. 
ott does not owe him anything for letting me go. 
And I don't think I owe Nott anything for helping me be let go? maybe I could've phrased that better. What I meant to say is that: I owe Nott nothing for his friend's behavior towards me. At least I don't think I do. 
But things works in mysterious way. Like how —despite how ironic I find it— Nott always find out a way to help me out during potions. Especially when it came to the ingredients. 
Though that was the least of my concerns right now. My concern, for now, is revolved between the three books in my hand that I can't decide —for the life of me— which one to buy. 
On other occasions I would buy all three and went about my day but I had only brought enough money for one book and food for the rest of the day at Hogsmeade, and my friend didn't seem like they'd be heading back to Hogwarts for extra cash any time soon. 
I looked over my options once more, trying to figure out which one would be the bang of my buck. 
Option one: All Or Nothing, a novel about a girl trying to navigate relationships with the people she surrounded herself with and see whether they would react differently when she gave them her all, and then; how they would react when she gave them nothing. 863 pages. 
Option two: Glimpse Of Us, a novel about a boy who always —and I mean always, sees his ex in the girls he dates after her. 295 pages. 
Option three: Listen boy, a cheesy novel about a girl who had little to no interest when it comes to going on dates with guys but when her roommate compliments her on the socks she wore, she finds herself wanting to do nothing but go on dates with them. 530 pages. 
Both Glimpse Of Us and All Or Nothing seems like sad book. Maybe it's time for me to find some joy in my life —which seems to seize to exist after whatever happened between me Nott happened. As I turned, intending to put those two books back in their respective places. I was more than surprise to find Nott looking at me with a slight fascinated tilt to his head.
“Which is it?”
"Hmm?" I find myself humming. Should I pick All Or Nothing instead? Wouldn't that make me seem more intelligent than a book about a girl being in love with her roommate. 
"Which one have you chose?" He clarified, and I might've imagined it —no I definitely did because, Theodore Nott's lips did not just curve up at all. 
"This one." I lifted up whatever was in my right hand which just happens to be Listen boy. And there goes sounding more intelligent in front of Theodore. "It seems cute." 
"Is that all?" He followed up and it's then that I realize he was wearing a forest green that had no reasons to make him look as good as it did. Green really was his colour. "Nothing more?"
"No." I shook my head. "Ideally I would like two get these two as well," I told him truthfully. "But I only brought enough for one —technically two, if I stretched it out but that would mean no snacks for the rest of the day so it's a no." 
"I'll get it for you then," he says casually. Like it's something you say to someone you recently rejected. Like he was walking around, waiting for someone to tell him that they haven't brought enough cash for the other books they wanted. "Would you like anything else? I am more than willing to indulge you." 
"No, I don't." I stop myself. Yes, I mean. Because I really did want other books, especially if someone else was paying for it but I know that my poor heart cannot handle it. 
It is already breaking apart at how handsome he looked with his forest green jumper and black ironed pants. His hair, a usual dark brown, just the slightest tinge brighter under the sunlight (which is both a sight for sore eye and a rare view since I only ever see him in the dungeons, hunched over a bubbling pot and disgusting lightings) which flatters him in all the best way possible. 
And no, my heart is not picking up a million paces over I am more than willing to indulge you in that very tone of voice, in that very set of clothes, in very set of lighting, by that very Slytherin that I could not seem to get over.
"You don't have to," I insisted, trying to not shiver under his gaze. He narrows his eyes and it says way more than words could ever say. He knows he doesn't, he wants to. Oh lord save me. "Maybe this one? It's cheaper." 
"That was not my question," he said curtly. "I asked you if you'd like anything else, not which option was cheaper."
What are we even talking about now? Was he planning on buying me the three books in my hands and more or was he planning on letting me pay for my choice then pay for the others I couldn't afford. 
Is my face that much of an open book? Because, without even having to say it. Theodore had already answered my questions for me. "I'll buy you the three in your hands and anymore you'd like. I'd buy you the whole store if you wanted me to." 
I think I'm having a heart attack. Or dreaming. Or both. I can't tell. Maybe I'm dreaming while having a heart attack? Who knows. All I know is that Theodore Nott did not just say that. Did he? 
"No." I shake my head quickly, maybe even too quickly. "No, I— these three are more than enough. I promise to pay you back when we get back to school."
Theodore fixes me a look. One ridiculing me to the point that I wished —more than anything— that I was a bludger being hit so hard I pass through the most oblivious of oblivions. I'm so sure that that would be less stressful. 
"I mean it!" I press all three books to my side. "I promise, and I always keep my promise. I won't take advantage of your money, I will get it and find you as soon as I—"
I didn't see the point in finishing my words because he was smiling. And laughing. I think. It's a mixture of those two and it's so heavenly that I believe in everything ethereal alike. 
Theodore noticed my silence, the side of his lips curved the slightest bit (so so small and tiny that you couldn't even spot it), looking at me with clearly amused eyes. And then, "did you not hear me?" 
"What?" The words slipped out easily. 
"I told you I'd buy you the whole store if you'd like and you think I'd want my money back?" He said slowly. "I couldn't care less about the money. I just wanted to make you happy. Salazar knows, I've made you upset more often than I could count between my fingers." 
Now what the fuck was he on about. He has never made me upset —save for rejecting me that one time,  but I understood it, he didn't like me, that's that. I have gotten over. I think. But I'm more than sure that I could count that one event between his ten fingers.
Unless Theodore only had one finger? Does he? I cast a glance down to his hands and there are those ten fingers. Ten exactly. Not one short or one more. Ten and a couple of silver bands that made me want to do nothing but sit and stare at his long, pale, slim fingers. And how they would feel around my— nope, nope. Absolute not. 
"Merlin, we leave Nott alone and he goes around trying to find his girlfriend." Girlfriend? 
When the owner of the voice, Zabini, finally arrives before me and Theodore, I was no where near surprised to see the other Slytherins in their group by his side. 
Parkinson. Malfoy. And finally, Greengrass —whom I was actually friends with. 
"Well?" Zabini muttered, eyes shifting between me and Theodore, and then landing on him solely. "Are the pair of you planning on standing here the whole day?" 
"No," I said with narrowed eyes. "I don't know what he's doing here, I'm just trying to buy a book." 
Zabini raised a brow. "Is that all, princess?" 
"Pretty much." This feels like a trap. Is this a trap? "Are you planning on going somewhere with Theo?" 
"Theo," Zabini tsked with a smirk. "I've never once called him that and I've known him for about five year now. How cute is that." 
Yep. This is definitely a trap. I think I'm going to die now. 
Theodore, with a roll of his eyes, made his way to my side and pried at the books pressed to my waist. Confused, and a little daze at the warmth of his fingers grazing my hip, I let go of the three books and watched him with wide eyes. 
He seemed (and looked) unaffected by how everyone eyes were now on him. Walking around and picking another set of the exact books I'd picked out. Theodore paid for them without a word, asking for separate bags and handed a set over to me. 
And then, quietly he says. "Zabini's an idiot." He smiled a winsome one and I am so sure I'm dying and this —whatever this was— is just a figment of my imagination that my brain curated during my dying breath. "I like it. Don't ever stop calling me Theo." 
•••
Blaise Zabini is trying to be matchmaker. I'm sure of it. Or else he wouldn't be bothering me as much as he did now. I can't seem to peacefully spend time in the library without being interrupted by him. 
"Hello," he greeted, smiling as he sat opposing me. I raised an eyebrow and he was able to read me quick enough, telling me the reason he was here. "Just wanted to let you know that Nott finished those three novels he bought and he's looking for someone to talk it over with a cup of tea —or coffee, whichever one you prefer." 
Is he implying what I think he's implying? "Why is that any of my concerns." 
"I thought you might be interested." He shrugged. "Since you know, you fancy Nott and all." 
"I don't fancy Nott." I told him. An obvious lie, and Zabini knew that too. "And he doesn't fancy me so it's just a waste of time." 
"Nott doesn't fancy you?" He's laughing. He's actually laughing. What was so funny about the truth? "What makes you think that?" 
"He literally turns me down I when I asked him out," I said blankly. "It's pretty clear, isn't it?" 
"And what exactly did he say?" Zabini asked playfully, as if he was humoring me. 
"Nothing," I answered. "He just looked at me and said nothing, I don't think I need anything else to tell me that it's an obvious no." 
"Nothing?" Zabini repeated with a grin. "Have you heard of being speechless? Or better yet, you know Nott doesn't really speak right?" 
"That doesn't excuse him saying nothing when I asked him to go on a date," I countered.
"It doesn't," Zabini concurred. "But Nott's an idiot." Funny, Theodore said the exact same thing about Blaise. "Did you know Nott did Malfoy's work for a week without complain just because he let you go that one time you snuck out?" 
No. I don't say. Malfoy did say Nott owe him one but I hadn't thought it important. "What does that have anything to do with what you were talking about?" 
"Because," he says exaggeratedly. "Nott fancies you back. I suspected that he liked you since third year though he won't admit it. He won't even admit that he fancies you now but he's incredibly easy to read." 
I shut my book and looked at him. Really looked at him. Trying to gauge whether he was messing with me or telling the truth. "What am I supposed to do with this information?" 
"Ask him out again," he suggested lightly. "Give him another chance for being the biggest twat there is."
"And have him reject me again?"
"He won't," Zabini says calmly. "He'd burn the entire school down before even thinking of rejecting you." 
I hesitate. "I don't want to embarrass myself again."
"You won't," he says with a roll his eyes. "Look I know being rejected is hard, I think I get it. I've never been rejected before. But I also know that the both of you like each other just as much and it's getting tiring seeing you beat around the bush." 
"Nott won't make the first move. He thinks you hate him now for not answering when you ask so you'd have to ask again —if you still want to be with him that is. Do you? Or else I've been doing all this for nothing." 
Yes. I think. I'm pretty sure that I want to be with him. "Do you know where he is?" 
"Oh," Zabini said delightedly. "He's actually coming here right now. I told him I was coming to find you but never gave him a reason why. He'd be here any —speaking of the devil. Hello, Theo."
Theodore doesn't bother to return his greeting. Eyes heavily set on Zabini in a glare that had me shivering just from the side lines. Then his eyes turn to me and his glare on hardens. 
"Hi, Theo." I don't think I've ever since Theodore like this before. "What are you doing here?" 
"What did he do?" He asked instead. 
"Nothing," I said quickly. "He did nothing. We just talked." 
"About?" 
"Stuff."
"Stuff?" 
"Yes. Stuff." 
"What kind of stuff?" 
"Oh you know," I huffed. "The weather. Coffee. You." 
"Me?" 
"Yes." My lips fold itself into a thin line. "Actually Theo. Could I ask you something?" 
His gaze softens when he nods.I am more than willing to indulge you.I am so sure now, more than ever, that love really is sour grapes. 
"Uhm— would you like to—"
His eyes widened, large as saucers as he processed in my words.
"—go out sometimes?" I finished. "As a Date?" 
One, two, three beats passes and all Theodore did was look at me. No answer. No emotions. No words. Nothing. And I am briefly reminded of everything that happened. 
And then, "yes," he says. "Yes, I would." 
•••
Theodore really did read those books he bought me. This I knew now as I sat under the sun on one of Hogsmeade many benches with Theo to my left. 
This part of Hogsmeade was quiet, it wasn't too far from the shops but far enough for no one to frequent by. A few people passed by trying to move from destination to destination but none noticed the bench wedge into the middle of the place where two fifth years were sat, talking about everything and anything under the moon and stars. 
"So you liked it? You liked 'Listen, boy'?"
"I did." He was smiling and I wished more than anything that I'd had a camera to capture every smile he had given me during the pass hours. "Is that so hard to believe?"
"Yes," I laugh and his smile widens. "It just doesn't seem like you. It's a cheesy and corny book and you're always so dark and broody about everything." 
"I'm not dark and broody about everything," he denied. 
"You are!" I countered. "You were even dark and broody when I'd first asked you out."
"That's 'cause I didn't know what to say," he says truthfully. "You could've said yes, that would've made it easy for the both of us," I told him. "I really couldn't. You don't deserve just a yes. You deserved everything, not something so simple." 
"But that yes would've made my week, Theo." 
Theo looked like he was about to say something before he changed his mind. "I'm sorry I didn't say yes when you'd first asked me. Could you ever forgive me?" 
I want to kiss him until his lips, his skin, his hands, his scent, every tiny bit of him is imprinted in my mind. "Yes." I say. "Yes, I think I could." 
Theodore chuckled, his nose crinkling at the motion and something between that laugh and smile of his causes me to lose it. 
My hand reached forward first, palm pressing against his cheek, pulling him closer to me and pressed my lips onto his. I kissed him once then as I reached to pull away; I find that both of his hands had found their way to my cheeks, holding me still as he kissed me back. 
Theodore pulled back, the tiniest of smile on his lips that had the smallest smudge of my lipstick attached to it. And he tells me, as if he had been thinking of this for days, years, lifetimes. "You are the prettiest girl I've ever seen." 
And when I smiled, Theo leans back in. Peppering quick kisses on my lips, my nose, my cheeks, my forehead, anywhere I would let him kiss me; he will cherish it. 
Once Theo finally pulls back —and this was for real this time, no more quick kisses. He looks at me and I know deep down that he will be the death of me when he says. "You are going to be the death of me."
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— from bee: the thing about theo is that we know nothing about him so you can’t say that this is ooc :>
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avatar-anna · 2 years
Text
Unknown Number
someone made a request about reader accidentally being given harry's number, but i accidentally deleted it, so if you requested it, here it is!
(the text chain will be from harry's point of view)
italics: y/n (unknown number)
bold: harry
Part Two
Part Three
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Unknown Number (UN): heyy. i had a really good time the other night. maybe we could do it again sometime? xx (click to download image)
Harry Styles (HS): How did you get this number?
UN: you gave it to me?
UN: last night at the pub? marcus, right?
HS: No. You have the wrong number.
UN: is this a joke? are you fucking with me right now?
HS: No.
UN: oh my god
UN: i feel like such an idiot
UN: one of the first times a guy gives me his number at a bar and he gives me the wrong number
UN: probably on purpose too
UN: i should've known when he left his OWN APARTMENT the next morning but i was actually hopeful
UN: and now i've made an ass of myself here too. sorry to bother you i'll leave you alone. sorry again
(one hour later)
HS: It's okay. Sorry about that guy. Sounds like a jerk.
(twenty minutes later)
UN: it's fine, i guess
UN: i wasn't in love with him or anything but he could've had the decency of expressing his disinterest himself instead of hiding behind a fake number.
HS: That is quite a dick move.
HS: I'm not gonna lie, I wasn't expecting that text. I didn't open the picture either by the way.
UN: thank you. for a moment i was worried i was messaging a creep, but hopefully you're not a creep
UN: i mean you could be still and i'd have no idea
UN: maybe i should stop texting you
(ten minutes later)
HS: I'm not a creep.
UN: that's exactly what a creep would say
HS: I don't really know how to prove it to you. You're the one who sent me a photo of yourself half naked. You could be the creep.
UN: you said you didn't open it!
HS: I was trying to be polite!
UN: great now some 40 year old living in his parents basement has one of my nudes
HS: I'm not 40! And I don't live in my parents basement
UN: you text like an old man
HS: wuld u rather i txt like ths???
UN: no but i'm just saying i don't know many people my age who use proper punctuation in text messages
HS: Well I might not be your age, but I'm certainly not 40
UN: "certainly not." you're right. you sound like my grandpa
HS: I suddenly regret restarting a conversation with you
UN: you know despite the fact that you might be catfishing me, i've enjoyed this. i feel like i'm doing what all the other teen girls did in high school at sleepovers
HS: So you're out of high school.
UN: creep!
HS: You outed yourself, that's not on me.
UN: you...might be right
UN: can you tell me something about yourself to make it even? there's always a possibility that you could be lying and i have no reason to trust you, but...idk i feel like i can
HS: Well that's stupid.
HS: But I suppose since I've already seen you partially naked...
UN: i'm blocking your number
HS: My first name is H, and I'm 20 years old.
UN: h? just the letter h?
HS: You could be a creep too for all I know
UN: fair enough. i'm june
HS: Full name? Wow, you really are a dummy.
UN: don't get your 60 year old panties in a twist. it's a nickname
HS: June is a nickname?
HS: And I'm not 60.
UN: june. june bug. that's what the folks call me
HS: Folks? Now who sounds old?
UN: whatever
(thirty minutes later)
HS: Well, it was nice talking to you, June. June bug.
UN: you too h
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(three days later)
June (J): you're a guy right?
HS: I'm sorry?
J: well when i first texted you i thought you were a guy, but you weren't THAT guy, so i have no idea
J: i just assumed but i thought i would ask
J: plus i need solicited guy advice and if you're not a creep i would really appreciate it
HS: We're back to me being a creep?
J: it's a risk every time i text you
J: so? are you a dude?
HS: Yes.
J: great! can i ask you something?
HS: Um...I guess...
J: ok. would you ever get offended if a woman covered their drink during a conversation with you?
HS: I'm not following...
J: like say we're at a bar and we're talking and i turn my head away for some reason but i put my hand over my drink until i look back at you to prevent it from being spiked. would you be offended by that?
HS: No. Why?
J: see? i don't think that's unreasonable. some loser got mad at me for doing that. well EXCUSE ME for not immediately trusting the guy i matched with on tinder
J: who was not as cute in real life i might add
HS: You don't have the best taste in guys.
J: that is not advice!
HS: Okay, here's my advice: don't swipe right on guys who have mirror selfies in their profile.
J: ...
J: ok fair enough but it's not like prince charmings are falling from the sky. it's hard out here
HS: I'm sure.
J: what you don't have the same problem?
HS: I don't really date.
J: in like a douchey way? are you one of those guys who say they just fuck?
HS: I just don't have time for dating, I guess.
J: so no special someone?
HS: No.
(four hours later)
HS: If you asked for advice, does that mean I can too?
(one hour later)
J: sorry i was at work
J: and i don't see why not
HS: What do you think about guys who wear skinny jeans?
J: hm...i think styled right it could be nice
J: YSL is kind of pushing the whole skinny jeans and chelsea boots thing which might eventually trickle down to the losers i match with on tinder so...why not? i say dress how you want
J: any guy who has a good sense of style is sexy to me
J: sorry if that wasn't the answer you were looking for
HS: Yes and no. I've been experimenting with different styles. Sometimes I get a little in my head about it.
J: doesn't everyone?
HS: I guess you're right.
HS: Do you follow fashion shows and things like that?
HS: That's not too personal, is it?
J: no, but it's kind of embarrassing
HS: Not as embarrassing as sending a complete stranger a picture of yourself in your bra
J: harsh...but fair
J: fashion is kind of my religion
J: i'm trying to become a stylist. keyword trying
HS: That's cool!
J: tell that to my family
HS: they don't support you?
J: nope! but i'm gonna do it anyway!
HS: Do you have a favorite designer?
J: it kinda depends on the year and who was creative director at the time, but the first time i got my hands on vintage vivienne westwood i was hooked
J: you?
HS: I'm just starting to explore the fashion world I guess you could say.
J: well lucky for you i happen to be a bit of an encyclopedia when it comes to house codes
HS: House codes?
J: oh boy. i hope you're comfortable. we might be here a while
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(two days later)
HS: Have you ever had rumors spread about you?
J: i don't think so
J: oh wait! in eighth grade this girl in my class told everyone i made out with a boy at the school dance which was NOT true
J: it was just a peck
HS: Naughty.
J: it was harmless. why do you ask?
HS: There's a rumor going around about me. It's just frustrating when people actually believe it. sometimes it gets to the point where i start to believe it myself.
J: i'm sorry. i won't pry or anything, but i know what it feels like to not be understood
HS: I just hate the feeling of being under a microscope. It's exhausting. I feel like my life isn't my own sometimes.
J: that sucks
J: sorry that was in no way helpful, but i don't really know what to say. is there someone you can talk to about this?
HS: ...
J: oh! i actually feel kind of honored
J: well, obviously i don't know the whole situation, but maybe try and surround yourself with people who don't scrutinize you so much?
HS: Easier said than done.
J: true but i think if you have a solid group of people who know you and understand you and like you for who you are, it's easier to deal with things like rumors and being under the proverbial microscope, you know?
J: and don't be afraid to get rid of the toxic people in your life! it's not easy but you'll be better off in the long run
HS: sometimes it's hard to tell who's toxic and who's not
J: start with the people who would never believe a rumor about you, or the ones who would never START one about you
HS: Well said, June Bug.
J: thanks! maybe i should entertain a career in counseling
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(one month later)
HS: Why June Bug?
J: i was born in the summer. it was a nickname my grandparents gave me. been called that ever since
HS: That's sweet.
J: there are worse nicknames i suppose. i have a cousin that got stuck with chip because he used to stuff his face like a chipmunk when he was little
HS: Yikes.
J: you're telling me
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(three weeks later)
J: have you ever danced alone in your bedroom to stevie nicks?
HS: Have you?
J: i have, and can i just say she does NOT get enough credit as a songwriter?
HS: Edge of Seventeen?
J: edge of seventeen
J: i went on a date last week with a guy who had the AUDACITY to call her music mediocre
HS: You didn't see him again did you?
J: ...
HS: June!
J: just once! and only because he had really nice hands
HS: I don't get how that would make you stay with a stevie hater...
J: REALLY nice hands ;)
HS: You disappoint me sometimes.
J: ;))))
(fifteen minutes later)
J: hey you never answered my question about dancing in your room!
HS: ...No comment...
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(one week later)
J: you ever been in love, h?
HS: I can't say that I have. Have you?
J: no ://
J: i think i want it too much. i've always just been in love with the idea of falling in love, you know?
J: but the reality isn't what i thought it would be
HS: I'm sorry.
HS: It probably won't help but I'm sure you'll find someone. You seem like a great person. Anyone would be lucky to be with you.
J: aw h you're making me blush!
HS: But perhaps you should stop looking for love on a hookup app
J: annnd good feeling gone
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(two weeks later)
HS: Guess who has two thumbs and got invited to Paris Fashion Week!
J: no fair!
J: and that joke doesn't work if i can't see you point to yourself. it doesn't work period
HS: I will let that slide because I know you're just jealous.
J: are you kidding me? OF COURSE i'm jealous! i can't believe you get to see Alessandro Michele's work up close
HS: Who?
J: don't think because we only communicate through text that i can't strangle you
HS: Relax. I'm only joking.
HS: Alessandro is a friend ;))
(ten minutes later)
J: sorry i just had to scream into my pillow
J: what exactly do you do again?
HS: I told you. I work in the industry.
J: but that could mean anything! the cosmetics industry, the movie industry, the meat packing industry...
HS: Meat packing?
J: you know what i mean!
HS: I do a lot of PR.
J: see. that wasn't so hard now was it?
HS: Can I go back to gloating?
J: only if you promise to give me a full report afterwards you go to all the shows
HS: Deal.
(four days later)
HS: Favorite movie?
J: that's hard...
J: it's probably cliche but the devil wears prada
HS: Good choice.
J: what about you?
HS: The Notebook.
J: really?
HS: Yes. Why?
J: do you say that to impress girls or because it's actually your favorite?
HS: Would you rather I have said a film with lots of car chases?
J: no
J: but i went out with a guy who was a film major once
HS: Is that a bad thing?
J: let's just say it won't be happening again
J: he thought he was superior for disliking popular movies. i hate that
HS: Well, I love The Notebook and I love Ryan Gosling
J: now THAT is something we can agree on!
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(six weeks later)
J: BIG NEWS
J: LIKE HUGE
J: GROUNDBREAKING
HS: And here I was thinking you forgot about me.
J: i texted you yesterday
HS: You asked me if my dick could move on its own.
J: a legitimate question! i nearly had a heart attack when i saw it in person
J: but i was also weirdly fascinated. my question was purely scientific!
HS: You said you had news?
J: right!
(twenty minutes later)
HS: Are you making me wait to create anticipation?
J: no sorry i got a phone call.
J: i got my first real gig as a stylist
HS: That's great! Congratulations!
J: thanks
HS: You don't sound excited anymore. What happened to all caps?
J: my mother happened
HS: Still not on board, then?
J: she told me it was a waste of time and that i should get a real job
HS: You're still gonna take it though right?
J: i don't know. maybe she's right. the pay is less than ideal. more like i'm being paid in experience, and it's not the clientele i was imagining...
HS: But it's a foot in the door, right? That's something.
J: i guess
HS: Make connections. Get good references. And who knows, you might actually enjoy yourself.
J: you're right.
J: it's for some up and coming band that's going on tour. pretty sure i was what they could afford
HS: Don't sell yourself short. You're gonna do great.
J: thanks. i hardly even know you and you're currently my biggest supporter
HS: What happened to Bill?
J: ancient history
HS: What was wrong with him? He seemed nice.
J: yeah
J: his girlfriend thought so too.
HS: On behalf of all men: Sorry. We truly are the worst.
J: agreed. what about you? still single?
HS: Yes, though people keep trying to set me up on dates.
J: the horror!
HS: Ha ha
HS: I just want to meet someone on my own terms.
J: i get that
J: i just want to meet someone who's actually a decent human being
HS: I'll be on the lookout.
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(three weeks later)
J: i think i've decided that tour life is not for me
HS: oh?
J: yeah. sitting on a bus for hours and hours with only myself to keep me company? no thanks
HS: it can't just be you on the bus can it?
J: no but i have a hard time making friends right away. and a lot of the crew for this tour are older than me
HS: are your clients nice at least?
J: yeah. one of them tried to hit on me, which i guess i should take as a compliment, but i am on the clock. no flirting for me
HS: a professional then. or are you not into the musician type?
J: not sure. i haven't dated one before
J: i told you that the other day
HS: right. must've slipped my mind
HS: but back to taste in men. is it all about looks for you or do you like funny guys?
HS: are you the type to sleep with someone on the first date? because i feel like that's very telling about a girl
J: who is this?
HS: what do you mean? it's me
J: it's not. you're not texting like a middle aged woman and you're acting like a total ass
HS: Sorry. I thought I'd try something new. And I was just curious. Can't blame a guy for asking right? You did send some guy you barely knew a picture of yourself
HS: It was very wholesome by the way. Maybe try a little more skin next time and you'll get the response you want. You can practice here if you'd like.
J: oh my god
HS: What?
J: this was a mistake. i'm such an IDIOT
J: was this some kind of prank?
J: whoever you are, you're sick
J: don't text me again
HS: June, I'm so sorry. That was my friend he was just being stupid.
HS: Last time I leave my phone anywhere.
HS: June?
HS: June please.
HS: That wasn't me I swear!
HS: I'm sorry.
(three weeks later)
HS: Day 21 of trying to get you to respond.
HS You probably blocked me which is fine. I don't blame you.
HS: But if you DO happen to read these and are just ignoring me...
HS: I'm sorry. Again. For like the millionth time.
J is typing...
HS: June?
J: i should've blocked you
HS: Why didn't you?
J: because as insane as it sounds, you've become a close friend
HS: I feel the same. I'm really sorry about before. I swear it was one of my mates. I would never say something like that.
J: that's what makes this whole thing crazy! i don't actually know you, so how do i know if i can trust you?
HS: I mean you even noticed that he wasn't texting like me. I would never ask you questions like that, June. I never have.
HS: And I do NOT text like a middle aged woman by the way
J: i guess that's true
J: i think it just doubled down the fact that we don't actually know each other. this whole thing is ridiculous if you think about it too long. it gives me a headache sometimes.
J: i know we've joked about it but...this could be potentially dangerous
HS is typing...
HS: I could send you a voice note.
J: you would do that?
HS: You're right. This whole thing is ridiculous but...I don't know, I trust you, and I consider you a friend.
J: a friend you say?
HS: That's all I'm willing to admit for one day
J: and what about tomorrow?
HS is typing...
HS (voice recording): Maybe tomorrow I'll admit a little more.
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(one day later)
Y/n hated how much her stomach flipped every time her phone pinged with a new message.
It was so reckless and dangerous and utterly ridiculous. She didn't know who H was, she didn't even know what time zone he lived in, and yet she felt like she knew him.
And after hearing his deep voice—deep British voice—on the voice recording, Y/n determined that he wasn't some creep in his forties like she'd originally thought.
Since sending that voice recording, they'd sent each other messages like that all night. And by all night she meant all night. They stayed up late sending voice recordings back and forth. It was the longest conversation they'd held to date, which was surprising considering that they often missed each other during certain hours. Just based on what hours of the day they texted the most, Y/n figured H lived somewhere in Europe, which gave her peace of mind considering he couldn't exactly kidnap her if he was a whole ocean away. But the last couple weeks their schedules seemed to be lining up, though Y/n chalked it up to all the traveling she'd been doing lately.
One thing she was certain of was that she adored H's voice. It was soft and deep, but got raspier the longer they spoke. And at times he would whisper in his messages, like he had to keep his voice down. The hushed tones made her shiver.
Y/n didn't call H, and he never offered. But she wanted to, boy did she want to. No matter how terrifying that thought was. A full-fledged phone call seemed more...real to Y/n. With the messages, she and H were still in their little bubble. It was stupid, but she needed that bit of separation. She was becoming attached to someone she'd never met.
Walking through the halls of a stadium in Canada, Y/n pulled up past conversations with H. It was too embarrassing to admit to anyone out loud, but she felt like she really knew him. He was endearing, had a silly sense of humor, had good taste in music, and was honest. Well, as honest as either of them could be. Outside of the one slip up with H's friend, Y/n believed what he said to her over text. Maybe that made her naive, but their conversations were legit. He felt like a friend, and she knew he felt similarly.
Maybe tomorrow I'll admit a little more.
Y/n had no idea what that could mean. She of course knew what she wanted it to mean, but what she wanted rarely ever lined up with reality.
Y/n looked up from her phone to make sure she didn't pass the right door. The one in front of her read, Harry Styles in big bold lettering. She quickly hurried past and continued down the hall to where the dressing room for Five Seconds of Summer was.
Harry Styles was a bit of an enigma. Even though she was on the same tour as him and One Direction, Y/n hardly ever saw him. And when she did, his nose was always in his phone, completely closed off to the world around him. He just had this vibe that said, "don't talk to me," and Y/n received that message loud and clear. The Five Seconds of Summer boys seemed to get on with all the members of One Direction, but Y/n usually made herself scarce whenever they came by the dressing room, for no other reason than too much testosterone in one room.
"You want to come out after the show, Harry?" Y/n heard one of the boys ask. Michael.
"Um...No. I think I'll have to pass tonight, boys. Sorry."
"What? Big date tonight?"
"Something like that."
Y/n felt frozen to the linoleum floor. She knew that voice. She'd spent all night listening to that voice.
"Holy shit."
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