#i might have been listening to all 3 high school musical soundtracks

[mythallia]

here is “keeping up with the solaire clan” in high school musical terms.

william is continuing to bop to the top by acquiring all of the bennetts assets, however, vincent is currently upset with will for how everything went down at the summit and is unsure if they will be able to work this out.

porter made the summit a night to remember but now wants to just stay right here, right now with treasure. he’s now questioning his life choices, and is unsure if he wants to stick to the status quo.

vincent really just needs to scream to let some of his frustration out because it’s now or never to decide if he wants to step into the not so legal side of the solaire business or not.

sam told will that he’s gotta go my own way, and has left the house of solaire.

alexis is just sharpay in hsm2 when she went through her super villain era (she’s been like this for decades)

lovely needs a fucking break (please erik, let them start breaking free from this constant cycle of trauma)

are vincent and lovely going to decide that they’re all in this together or will they walk away from the solaire clan to see the start of something new?

tune in next week to find out!

[thecomfywriter]

writeblr interview

thanks for the tag @illarian-rambling <3

No further ados! Let's get straight into it :)

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Short stories, novels, or poems?

If we're talking about writing them-- novels more often than the others, but i dabble into all of them ngl. I tried writing poetry once upon a time, and while it's not all bad, it's not all good either (i shared some of the bad ones here, buried deeply in the archives. i might share the good ones sometime who knows). and short stories i used to do all the time with my irl writer friends, where we'd give each other 3-word prompts and an hour to bust one out. 10/10 recommend lol in terms of reading, all of them :)))

What genre do you prefer reading?

high fantasy and classics. give me wuthering heights and the iliad. but also, things you'd find on a high school english class reading list. i love those types of inquisitive stories

What genre do you prefer writing?

high fantasy, political fantasies or political conspiracy fictional stories. give me the complicated lore and old history, and all the strategy and war tactics and yadayada. i LIVE FOR IT

Are you a planner or a write-as-I-go kind of person?

extreme planner. i have planned every single potential wip i have in the drafts and for the future in my notion. chapter per chapter outline. scene per scene. entire oc wiki pages. lore pages. even a dictionary for their languages and different dialects, AND the scriptures they refer to/believe in. extreme planner.

What music do you listen to while writing?

whichever playlist i'm in the mood for, but typically it's my writing, august 8, or the (un)official tov soundtrack. the genres on those are so mixed, i can't even say: oh its classical, oh its r&b. no. its just vibes. anyhow, on the discord server, you can actually see what music i listen to while i write LOL because i linked it. but yes, i'll link my spotify here too because why not?

Fave books/movies?

favourite books are the iliad, the giver, wuthering heights, the last dragon, a thousand splendid suns, and the remains of the day. i've gone on a tangent about them before here!

Any current WIPs?

i'm in the editing phases of Throne of Vengeance, which I plan on publishing very soon (👀) and the writing stages of Court of Sins!

If someone were to make a cartoon out of you, what would your standard outfit be?

Hair half up in a bun and half down. Biker shorts or men's oversized lounge shorts. oversized (men's, probably) t-shirt or hoodie, or if it's with the biker shorts, a muscle-tee or a cropped tank top. layered gold necklaces, rings on every finger, multiple gold piercings and cuffs on both ears, my classic gold chain, gold bracelet, and iron cuff on my left wrist. sneakers/running shoes/vintage mint nike tennis court shoes. i have the whole outfit DOWN lmao

Create a character description for yourself

typical brown girl who can't escape the overenthusiastic punjabi girl stereotype because of her loud and eccentric personality. has strong "youngest sibling" energy with a strong level of independence and yet an immediately willingness to let someone else take care of things. flip flops between dressing extremely well and being a fashion icon with impeccable style, to dressing like she ran out of all her clothes and can only wear knitted dishrags. has been canonically told by her father she is "the son [he] never had". she doesn't know what to do with this information. incredibly studious and a huge academic. if she didn't have the extroverted personality she did, people would be more inclined to calling her a nerd. instead, they call her intelligent and call it a day. slightly a teacher's pet. can convince anyone and everyone around her to do her a favour because she's mysteriously persuasive. doesn't know how to do romantic love, but is 1000% invested in showering people in platonic love. has 10k different hobbies, none of which are remotely related. every week, she finds a new topic to obsessively research about and ramble to her voice memos to. as her sisters and friends like to say, "her life is like a series of side quests" i think that about does it., lest i wished to keep rambling LOL

Do you like incorporating people you actually know into your writing?

yes and no. i like taking a singular piece of lore from people i know, typically with their permission. so, some of the ocs in my books are named after people i know in real life whom i asked if i could name my character after. it doesn't really go beyond oc naming, tbh. i feel like stealing people's real life lore is kinda... invasive? idk.

Are you kill-happy with characters?

1000% and my best friend hates me for it. i feel like a toxic partner, only capable of showing my ocs affection by making them suffer

Coffee or tea while writing?

both, plus other substances. cold water. diet soda. hot water. milk. hot cocoa. literally everything.

Slow or fast writer?

fast, but it depends on a) if i'm in school or not (pre-med babyyyyy); b) if i have a deadline of not (i once finished a full draft in 3 months because i put the finish date on my document and felt the need to meet that deadline)

Where/who/what do you find inspiration from?

my childhood and my childhood stories. disclaimer: i DID have a happy childhood, before anyone makes any wild assumptions LOL

If you were put into a fantasy world, what would you be?

a bookkeeper, a scholar, or a soldier. or an adventurer. not just because they're cool, but because that's what i currently do irl, so why not in a fantasy setting too?

Most fave book cliche?

friends to lovers trope for romances. jealousy arcs. misunderstandings that are DONE RIGHT. angst. ANGST. found family. the old mentor. things like that, i eat it right up like we're in an all-inclusive buffet

Least fave book cliche?

toxic male leads who everyone forgives because they're hot. i honestly can't think of much. if it's executed right, everything is fun and freegame

Fave scenes to write?

i genuinely have no clue. i love writing in general. maybe the dialogue fluff scenes that never make it to the final draft because they're so absolutely filler but they butter my croissant in ways only a boulangerie would be able to serve?

Most productive time of day for writing?

night time with the cityscape if i'm in my uni town! daytime in my mancave if i'm in my hometown!

Reason for writing?

i've always been a storyteller, and i can't exist with this world in my mind without opening the gates for everyone to pay a visit. i enjoy sharing what i love. they say the universe is expanding, and that is an undeniable fact, for all the proof i need is in the way the worlds in my head keep growing.

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thanks again for the tag, my love <3

i'll tag @writingismydrugs @drchenquill @wyked-ao3 @willtheweaver @satohqbanana and @pexchys

cheerios!

[styrmwb]

Favorite Final Fantasy Music (FFVIII)

eight

VIII is a weird game. Everything about it is weird. The plot is weird, the gameplay is weird, the world is weird, the characters are weird, and of course, the sounds are weird. They're unique! Like VII, VIII has a very distinct sound, and I love it. I love VIII for all of its strangeness. I think out of the 3 PS1 games, it's not my Favorite soundtrack, but it's fucking Final Fantasy. There's literally not a bad soundtrack in this entire goddamn series. This shit is B tier AT WORST. Let me tell you about my favorite songs, as I love to do, and you can judge me silently in your transparent gray textboxes if you so wish.

5. Silence and Motion This is a silly song; I love how silly it is. It's perfect for a silly future city ruled by a very silly man. This starts by feeling very strange and cautious, probably like how you would feel if you entered a random futuristic city in the middle of an icy wasteland - and then the circus music starts? and it makes you feel like, oh actually this place is good? Then it speeds up. You feel a sense of rush. A silly sense of rush, but a sense of rush regardless. And Boom, the fuckin super speedy xylophone kicks in, and this song sounds like a busy city, with people running around, it SOUNDS like what a busy news station would sound like. That's my favorite part right there.

4. Blue Fields bum bum BUM BUM bum bum bum bum BUM BUM. Going from a silly song into a fun song. Fun, yet also calming. Blue Fields is the perfect name for this song, because to me, the main instrument in the melody reminds me of water? This might be an insane person take but like it sounds like a pool looks to me. But not like a community pool I mean like a classic backyard pool with the good blue siding. I'm rambling worse than I usually do. I do not get sick of listening to this song while walking across the overworld, and it is very important for an overworld song to be something you are not going to get sick of, cause you're going to be ALWAYS listening to it.

3. Balamb GARDEN This song sounds like a school. This is a song of LEARNING. And like sure it's a school where you're learning to be a child soldier but like who cares this is an AMAZING song for where it plays. It feels like school, but it also feels like home (it is home!). I love the strange piano sound it has (again, FFVIII has a very unique sound and I love it for that) and then you get the odd flute/wind instruments as well. As I was starting this list, I was expecting me to put a lot more battle themes, but it turns out I love the overworld themes a lot more than I thought??? Anyways, let's immediately throw that thought away and go into:

2. The Extreme Here's the battle music. The final battle music even. This song starts out so cool, giving you the same FITHOS LUSEC WECOS VINOSEC "motif" that has been spread through a few points throughout the game, and a somber piano opening before going full into the actual meat of the song, which is INCREDIBLY COOL SOUNDING. It's all like, awesome fuckin synth instruments and a high energy melody and backing that pumps you up as a final boss theme should. I love the part where the synth goes ham up and down the scale towards the middle of the song, and then of course there's the part where it slows down and brings in the choir reminding you of almost like, the core of what this encounter is, against a magic wielding sorceress (who I swear the translation should have been witch but whatever!!!). Banger song.

1. Force Your Way Honest to god contender for best normal boss theme in the whole series (VI might have it beaten out by a slight margin). I LOVE the intro so much; the organ and the heavy string hits building up the atmosphere with the little bwoodooloodooloodoo in the back going into the sickest synth melody you've ever heard in your goddamn life. Throw in a little heavy MIDI guitar and you've got the hypest moment of your life. I can imagine Uematsu had a LOT of fun crafting this one for the game, this is easily the pinnacle of how unique FFVIII's sound is and I hope I've beaten you over the head with this fact that I've made enough. This song should make you feel like you should pick up that Yamaha keyboard your family has sitting in the basement and you should fiddle with it for At Least Like 2 Hours.

Honorable mentions this time go to The Man With The Machine Gun, Maybe I'm a Lion, Fisherman's Horizon, The Castle, and water and water and water water (Don't Be Afraid)

[bi-fiend]

Hey! I’ve never watched an anime series apart from Avatar stuff, if that counts. Do you have an anime series to recommend? I strongly prefer dubs over subs, and I like fantasy. Thanks !

Might I suggest delicious in dungeon? It's about a dnd party cooking and eating monsters in a dungeon, as they save their leader's sister from a red dragon's stomach before it digests her. it is on Netflix!

Below are some more anime recs with short summaries and where to watch them, keep in mind I'm shit at summaries ↓↓↓

Mob Psycho 100: middle school student, shigeo kageyama just wants to live a normal life, Despite his psychic powers. He is taken advantage of for said powers by a con man pretending to be a psychic, reigen arataka. He runs a business called Spirits and Such, where he (mostly mob) (that's shigeo's nickname) exorcises spirits bothering his clientele. Mob's powers are also a good metaphor for autism, I think it's canon that mob's autistic? Anyway, it's fuckin' fantastic. I love this. And I love mob?? Forever and platonically?? It's on Netflix, Hulu and Crunchyroll (season 1 is free but 2 & 3 need a premium subscription)

Sk8 The Infinity: high school student Reki introduces his new friend Langa to skateboarding, and. I can't recommend you watch this enoughm despite the simple premise I gave, it's fucking fantastic! I can't put these feelings into words!Please! It is free on Crunchyroll with ads, but the dubs after episode 3 require Crunchyroll premium.

Bocchi the Rock!: and here I thought mob was literally me! Hitori wants to be in a band, because in the words of the band that inspired her, a band is where an introvert can shine! She spent her days practicing and pouring her soul into the guitar, practicing to be ready to perform at her middle school's culture festival! But, well, in her own words,

"I practiced six hours every day, so I could learn how to play in front of people... The result? Middle school ended and I never played a single note for them! I never performed once... at the culture festival! I never put together... the members for a band! And I never made a single friend... In three whole years! Now, in high school... I gotta form a band or die trying! But, despite my vow, it's been a whole month since high school started, and yet my heart remains grounded in the guitar, little better than a shut in..."

Sasaki To Miyano:

Anyway, she joins a band and that's all I'm gonna say because thisssss is getting too long. She has social anxiety! Jus like me! And she has my exact fear for the future. it made me cry tears of deep unfocused fear and misery. It's free on Crunchyroll with ads, but there's no dub. But! But! I promise you it's worth a watch! The animation is great, the voice acting is great, the humor is great, the characters are great, the story inspires me to get my shit together (thus great), and the SONGS? OUGGGHHH DONT GET ME STARTED ON THE SONGS. THSI ANIME SINGLEHANDEDLY MADE ME REALIZE HOW MUCH I LOVED MUSIC. IVE CRIED AT SOME OF THE SONGS FOR ONE REASON OR ANOTHER. EVEn if you don't watch the anime, at least listen to the soundtrack! try Rock'n roll, Morning Light Falls On You! It's crack cocaine in song form! Thank you for coming to my ted talk!

oohhhhhhgodherewego

Alright first things first, this shits adorable. Understatement! High school student Miyano befriends this guy Sasaki, and he gets interested in the bl manga that miya reads, and he borrows one. Much to Miyano's surprise, he loved it! ohhhhhgod i can feel the hyperfixation taking hold once again over time, they start to fall in love. Yeah, it's BL!!!! Fuxk! I love yaoi! I love life! The world hath gained colour! Funny part is, uh.miya's straight. He contemplates things on front of his bookshelf of BL manga. Taking a line from a summary I saw on YouTube, reading bl manga everyday and having an entire bookshelf of bl manga, while saying "yeah I'm straight!" Is a special kind of in the closet. Anyway fuckkkkkkkkkkkki love thsi series soooooososososososoo much. I have RAMMED MY HEAD INTO A WALL BECAUSE OF THIS. I HAVE PACED THE LIVING ROOM LISTENING TO THE SOUNDTRACK LIKE RETIRED MIDDLE AGED DETECTIVE GOING THROUGH A DIVORCE HAUNTED BY A COLD CASE HE JUST CANT CRACK BECAUSE OF THIS. granted that was me going delirious with hungerSASAMIYA IS MY REASON TO LIVE. anyway it is unfortunately exclusively on Crunchyroll for a premium subscription, but you can READ it! Yeah its 10 volumes are online to read! for free! call your dentist, you will gain cavities! but I do hear the dub is phenomenal!

Sorry for yappin', and happy viewing if you decide to watch any of these! Can you tell sasamiya and bocchi are my faves?

[emotionalhxc]

Strawberry Hospital Q&A transcribed <3 PART 3

Q: whats your favourite metal song if you have one N: "favourite metal song of all time is impossible to choose but only recently I have been obsessed with this since I heart it earlier this month"

Q: holoparasite is my favorite songs and I was wondering what inspired you to make it N: "simple repetitive gloomy looped music like the yume nikki soundtrack! I wrote it in like an hour which basically never happens for Strawberry Hospital tracks" Q: wat is cherish about :l? love ur music btw<3 N: "desperate attempts at avoiding abandonment and going as far altering your own identity to be what somebody else might prefer... (pro tip do not do this ^^) I wanted the cute electropop instrumentation to contrast the somewhat hopeless subject matter" Q: R u ever doing a show in Houston again? I loved seeing u live! N: "without a doubt I will be back! my favorite photo of that performance is currently my bandcamp banner actually" Q: What synthesizer, sampler, etc. do you dream of having? Old/new, common/rare... N: "need a full rack of ROMplers, then I will die happy. I already have my beloved SC-88 but would adore an Akai or Yamaha module in addition ! somehow I do not own a physical microKorg either?" Q: also do you watch sailor moon and if so whos your favorite character<3 N: "when I was 4 years old I begged my mother to purhacse a VHS copy of one of the episodes judging only from the cover art style, I haven't seen much since then but that probably caused me to develop an adoration for the magical girl genre long term... wait is this question because my name is Neptune...!" Q: azure is literally my favorite song ever😭is there a reason u made the song??/meaning? N: "awe I'm overjoyed that you appreciate Azure! there were countless musical influences that were poured into this one like cyrbergrind and darkstep and glitch pop, etc. I wanted harsh instrumentation layered with dense sweet melodies and harmonies lyrically, the song is a metaphor for drowning in an abyssal river of your own tears, and imagining a single angelic individual saving you or at least accompanying you in your demise it's also about grief, mutual forgiveness, and is dedicated to someone specific" Q: Hihi! Your wonderful music has brought so much comfort to me. :3 what are your favourite anime series? N: "ah!! thank you very much... I received a few instances of this question so I'll consolidate them into one response current top 5 favorites (excluding feature length animated films): - Kaiba - Madoka Magica - Haibane Renmei - Alien 9 - Princess Tutu"

Q: I really loved I miss you so long, can you tell more in depth of it pls N: "an older favorite! that one is primarily written about lethargy, escapism, and being a self depricating NEET after high school graduation (I'm reformed now as that was many years ago lol)" Q: have you ever seen the covers of the songs like Memento? (Examples: velvet by lilac) N: "yes I have mixed feelings about that specific cover. that said, I have enjoyed many of lilac's original productions and I have listened to most other covers of my songs from other musicians. it is a deeply flattering gesture" THAT'S ALL. I hope you all enjoyed reading this, I'm a huge fan of Neptune's music and I really wanted to do this to keep a log of strawberry hospital's Q&A in a somewhat more permanent way/digital archive way. Lots of love to you all xo emotionalhxc signing out :3

[dvandom]

Top 10 Hits of the 70s

I lived through the 70s, but didn't really start paying attention to pop/rock music until around 1982 or 1983. But for the last few years, a local Classic Rock station (which, distressingly, is starting to move into the 90s as "classic") has run Casey Kasem's American Top 40: The 70s on Sunday mornings. I can usually manage to catch the top ten, or at least the top five (hey, I sleep late on Sundays). There's almost always stuff that's fairly new to me, even in the top spots, which gives me an interesting view on the staying power of popular music.

Roughly speaking, Top 10 hits of the 70s can be chunked into four tiers, although where any particular song ends up is somewhat dependent on your own experiences.

Tier 1: This is the stuff you could play for a room of high school or college students and a lot of them would recognize it. Whether it's been used in a soundtrack, an ad campaign, or a viral video, these are the songs that have managed to stick around in the public consciousness for fifty years for good or for ill. Not always number one hits, though, sometimes they were just rediscovered later and finally found an audience, or they were "sold a million copies but took a while to do it so never hit number 1" deals.

Tier 2: There's still a good chance of hearing these songs even today, but now you have to go looking in places catering to Gen X and Boomers. They show up on Classic Rock and Easy Listening stations (the Billboard charts had a lot of ballads and dreamy instrumentals in the 70s), or as backing for ads you'll only see during Old People Shows. They might even pop up in store muzak once in a while, or get covered by more recent acts. (For an example of that, a fairly recent cover of "I Got You Babe" has been on college radio of late.)

Tier 3: Here's where it gets a lot more subjective. These are songs that were popular enough in the 70s that someone not actually paying attention to pop music would still have heard them. Pop cultural splashes beyond just the Billboard charts. A lot of these are from Christmas Albums (it seemed everyone was doing them in the 70s)...even if I hadn't been listening to country music in the 70s, I'd have heard the John Denver Muppet Christmas songs, for instance. This tier also includes things that were tier 1 for a while but have faded since and might as well not exist in pop culture today. Number one hits like this made a splash, but the ripples faded fairly quickly.

A lot of these were by acts that jumped on a trend and only had one or two hits before the trend faded and they went back to playing county fairs for a living or the equivalent. But some were just lesser pieces by super-popular groups. For instance, the Bee Gees are remembered enough that Saturday Night Live did a sketch around the group in 2024, and some of their hits are definitely Tier 1 (like Stayin' Alive). But they also had a lot of stuff that had no real staying power, but which hit the top ten purely because people were buying everything they released. A similar modern result would be the case of Taylor Swift capturing the entire top ten recently...I rather doubt all ten songs on that album will be remembered by any but the most diehard fan in 20 years, and if there are any that stick around they might not even be the ones in the top five.

Tier 4: "I have never heard this song before in my life," sort of reaction. Or, if I have, it was only in the context of AT40 reruns or historical music shows like I used to watch on VH1. Things like the spoken-word "The Americans" single, or "I Like Dreamin'" (which was number five on this day in 1977, and I can't recall having ever heard before).

I actually like that Tier 4 songs exist. Not only do I get to occasionally hear new-to-me music that is similar to things I already like, but it also means that our culture of "don't innovate, remake" in mass media hasn't mined out EVERYTHING. There are things that used to be popular and are not being shoved back in our face by aging entertainment executives terrified of being the one to try something new.

[amazing-spiderling]

Music ask game: 2 5 14 18 19 30 35 47 64 blue

2. Do you still buy CDs (or other physical media)?

I do! I actually still buy *blank* CDs and burn stuff to play in the car (although we finally figured out how to make the USB port play nice so that's less of a priority). I think I'm most likely to buy CDs from small indie bands at small events or live shows? Or like when I went to Meow Wolf I *HAD* to have the CDs of the music they played throughout the venue and the arcade. Also a few years ago I decided to start collecting LPs in earnest. Not like, as a BIG THING, but I bought a record player that wasn't from the thrift store and now I have a few dozen records, largely anime and video game soundtracks, but also Vaporwave and Chillwave stuff and a few "normal" bands as well.

5. Is there a song you don’t like but like its music video?

Uhhh.... I honestly couldn't think of one. OTL I dunno, I feel like these days you have to actively seek out music videos, and a lot of them are just kind of whatever. So I probably wouldn't go looking for the video of a song I didn't care for. Maybe there was a time when someone sent me a memey music video for a terrible song but I can't really think of any. :/

14. A song or album from the 50s or earlier:

Okay, this cover is from much later, but the original is from 1958. I have this whole silly headcanon from an old Spideypool Back to the Future AU that I never did anything with that involved this song, so it sticks out in my memory.

18. A song or album from the 90s:

Even though Sailor Stars hadn't been released in the US at the time I was in high school, my friends and I were the kind of nerds to get our hands on fansubs and third hand information about the final season and became low key obsessed with the Sailor Starlights. It became very important that I learn all the words to Sailor Star Fighter's image song.

19. A song or album from the 2000s:

From 2004. I saw a silly "what your favorite anime says about you" meme that said if your favorite was Samurai Champloo you think you're a little bit cooler than everyone else, and you're low key kind of right. XD I don't know if it's my favorite of all time, but I'm willing to accept that assessment anyway. This was a track I had on repeat through a lot of the 2000's

30. Songs you love to sing along to:

I don't even particularly like Metal Gear Solid 3 but I'd be lying if I said Snake Eater isn't an absolute bop.

35. A song you like in a language you don’t speak:

What else could it be? :)

47. Is there an artist you used to dislike but learned to like because of a friend’s influence?

...Huh. I think maybe not? I feel like I'm pretty instinctive about stuff like music. At most I might go from "I was unaware of this until now" to being really into it, but if I don't like something at first listen, I'm probably not going to grow an appreciation for it, since my reasons for disliking music usually has to do with how it makes me feel physically. (Stuff that's really intense like death metal and dubstep sort of makes my chest and head hurt- that's not going to change any time soon.)

64. [Send me a color and I’ll post an album cover art of that color.]

Daredevil '03 kids will understand XD

[televinita]

Am listening to Taylor Swift music again, and have been seized by the need to talk through some of her older albums -- favorite songs, personal history, whatever comes to mind. Maybe in yet another attempt to try and figure out my overall fave / ranking of them as a set? No real order is planned for this so I thought I’d start with this one, because I realized I actually hadn’t listened to it in quite some time.

(I don't really know what this mini-project is going to be but I’ve been noodling on it for a few nights and now seems as good a time as any to share.)

Background/Overview

When it was new -- and a 2010 Christmas present for me -- it was my favorite of the three, but now I'm not sure. The thing is that it has several songs I like better than the entirety of Fearless (except for #1 fave Change), but it also has a handful I find less interesting compared to that one’s “13 track listings, stars beside them all” success, and I can’t decide how to weight that. It does absolutely have the prettiest cover and booklet, though.

Songs

Ask me my favorite song on this album and I’ll say without hesitation Long Live. I don’t think that will ever change; it’s in my all-time-faves across her whole discography. The twin/companion piece to Change, it never fails to make my heart sing. It came out after I was an adult but it still makes me nostalgic and occasionally teary as hell for high school. Bonus association: this was my mental soundtrack for the end of Glee season 3 too (”for a moment, a band of thieves in ripped-up jeans got to rule the world").

Runner-up faves are Haunted, which really lives up to its name (Wuthering Heights-haunted style, maybe... between the electric guitar tearing open the scene and the chimes, the instrumentation is epic; this may be the only song that actually loses emotional impact as an acoustic/piano version), Better Than Revenge (which is my not-even-that-guilty pleasure and I will JAM OUT to it to this day; "no amount of vintage dresses gives you dignity" is SAVAGE and I love it), and The Story of Us ("looks like a lot like a tragedy now" is one of my favorite quotes to bust out in episode reviews about ‘ship destruction, or was when I still did those), which is similarly jam-out-worthy. Ooh, and Sparks Fly is one of those songs where I'm like, "WHY wasn't this a single, it's so good." I’m actually always kind of surprised that one isn’t the album opener; “my mind forgets to remind me you’re a bad idea” is my anthem for giving shows/ships/characters/episodes way more chances than they deserve. (Grey’s Anatomy. We’re mostly talking about every time I dip back into the Grey’s Anatomy waters). In slow-songs-I-like territory: Enchanted, which is frankly too pretty for the person it’s actually about (but helpfully easy to apply to anyone and relevant to every listener’s life). And Back to December, which suffers rather unjustly from my knowing that it’s about The Boring Taylor, because I used to automatically skip it about half the time, yet every time I actually listen to it I'm shocked to realize it’s way prettier than I remember. Both musically (when male vocals...enhance?? a taylor song??) and lyrically.

As far as the other singles, I kind of killed Mine for myself with overplay, but I do think it's one of the strongest singles she's ever released...and as I’m listening to it now, I think it might be back! What good music, what a sweet scenario, and how much do I love the “brace myself for the goodbye / ‘cause that’s all I’ve ever known...” part.

Mean is fun and deservedly sassy, although it too is recovering from overplay (with the added demerit of being covered in the worst, least appealing possible way on Glee and feeling tainted forever. Once upon a time this was in my top 5 for the CD). Speak Now is fun too, but also...damn, so much more juvenile and mean-spirited to me now than Better Than Revenge. You don't help a dude ditch his bride at their wedding! If he shouldn't be marrying her you talk to him BEFORE THE CEREMONY???? I have definitely lost enchantment with this one over time.

One I don’t know how to feel about: I have to be in the right mood for the song so I don’t always let it play through, but as a late bloomer homebody and perpetual looker-backer, the second half of Never Grow Up really kicked me in the heart when I first heard it. I thankfully never ended up having to experience this, but "here I am in my / new apartment in the big city / they just dropped me off / it's so much colder than I thought it would be / so I tuck myself in, and turn the nightlight on" really described all my deepest fears about graduating from college and still brings a twinge at the mere thought.

On the downturn: unpopular opinion but while Dear John is full of great lyrics, it’s just so damned slow that I skip it almost every time. I’m really hoping it gets reinvigorated by a Taylor’s Version, because whenever I give it a chance, I just end up freshly disappointed by the wasted potential.

Innocent is slightly more compelling music-wise, but still rather slow and often skipped, not least because it just...feels weird. Uneven. There are some great lines and a good idea buried in here, but with its history and context it's so patronizing even when I’m on Taylor’s side that it ends up cringe.

Meanwhile, Last Kiss doesn't even exist to me. It covers the same criminal territory as Back to December but it's EVEN SLOWER. Bonus Tracks I didn't hear them until the end of 2012 and even then only as standalones on Spotify, separate from the album associations, I absolutely love all three, more than the last 5 or 6 above in fact. Ours is the companion piece / sequel to "Mine," If This Were A Movie is sweet, and Superman is so cute and catchy.

[somethingvinyl]

The Mothers’ next album is a big one, and their last as a going band. FZ wanted the band to make a movie called Uncle Meat, and they spent a long time on the film and its soundtrack. By the time the album came out, Zappa knew he wouldn’t be finishing the movie—the liner notes call this album a soundtrack to a film you’ll probably never see. A sortof version of the Uncle Meat film was finally released in the ‘80s, but I have not heard good things. It was cobbled together from the original video shot by the Mothers in the late ‘60s and new material from the ‘80s, and does not cohere into a vision of what the original might have looked like if finished. That’s what I’ve heard—I’ve never attempted to watch it. 200 Motels was bad enough, and he finished that one. Zappa is one of my favorite composers of all time, and a lousy storyteller (I feel this way about his rock operas too).

In keeping with this dichotomy, this “soundtrack” is one of Zappa’s greatest achievements. It can be a bit of a mess—you can hear the stresses forming that will soon cause Zappa to dissolve the Mothers entirely. The most obvious sign is the skit “If We’d All Been Living in California,” which is just a candid recording of Jimmy Carl Black arguing with FZ about not making any money. It’s actually fairly painful to listen to. But this album is the furthest out into jazz/classical fusion that the original Mothers will venture. The title track and Dog Breath have long afterlives as live showpieces for just about every subsequent Zappa band, there’s some warped, surrealist doo wop that could never have been on Ruben & the Jets, and all of side 4 is devoted to King Kong, one of Zappa’s finest compositions to date.

After this album, Zappa called a meeting and abruptly, unilaterally dissolved the Mothers of Invention. The rest of the band were furious—they thought of it as a BAND, but FZ thought of them as his employees. He thought that touring with so many musicians was becoming too costly, especially since a number of them couldn’t play his compositions to his satisfaction: he’d augmented Jimmy Carl Black with the much more technically proficient Art Tripp on drums, for instance, and figured it would be better if he could just start over with the right musicians rather than having to drag along the guys he’d started with. It was cold, heartless logic, very in keeping with Zappa’s character. The band was right to be angry, but though he could have handled it better (and maybe NOT claimed sole composer credit for pieces entirely improvised by other members of the band, for instance), Zappa was right that it was time for him to move on. The original Mothers represent a great era, but he was composing music far beyond their greasy, home-brewed R&B roots.

If you stream Uncle Meat or get the CD, make sure to skip the penalty tracks. There are three “bonus tracks,” bizarrely placed between sides 3 and 4, that come from the ‘80s movie and are nigh-unlistenable. For years I ignored disc 2 entirely because of them, meaning I missed out on King Kong!

My copy of the vinyl is the modern re-issue. I bought it before I had succeeded in finding many FZ records on original vinyl—Michael Bremer praised the sound quality of the pressing, and that was enough for me. Still is, since I haven’t replaced it. Still, I’d like to get a copy with the Bizarre labels, since this was the first album issued with them. Zappa left Verve after Mothermania and got a distribution deal with Reprise to run Bizarre as a full label. In this era he also put out a slew of releases by other artists on Bizarre and its sister label Straight, most notably his high school friend Captain Beefheart and the early works of Alice Cooper.

[lilliganmusic]

If you had to ask me what my favourite anime OST’s would be then here they are! Top 10 obviously because who doesn’t love lists?

I have amazing taste in anime OST’s btw, so I will be eagerly awaiting comments from those who haven’t already been blessed by these anime, telling me how good these tracks are.

Honorable Track Mentions from anime that didn’t make the cut:

Ao Haru Ride

“Ao Haru Ride”

“I Will - Instrumental”

“忘れられない時間”

Cowboy Bebop

“Cats on Mars”

“Piano Black”

“Rush”

Demon Slayer

“A Butterfly’s Dream & Anger”

“Kamado Tanjiro no Uta”

“Rengoku’s Last Smile”

Neon Genesis Evangelion

“Asuka Strikes”

“Decisive Battle”

“Misato”

“Rei II”

One Punch Man

“BATTLE!!”

“Mysterious”

“Seigi Shikkou”

And now on with the list!

10. Wonder Egg Priority

YEAHHHH, GOOD OST!!! I think the music is really cool and funky in this show! Probably the most unique OST I’ve ever heard. I love how the music can be so light and whimsical one moment, then “oh shit, we are fighting the metaphorical manifestation of your trauma and could very well die”. It’s like the kind of music you would have for an alarm or a ringtone. I think “Wonder Egg” and “花開く時” might very well be my favourite tracks, but I have a special place for “いぎ戦わん、乙女たちよ” as well. It’s upbeat and creepy! There isn’t a bad song in the OST, the only downside with the tracks would be how short they are!!

“WEP fans shocked that someone is finally talking about the anime.”

9. Ouran High School Host Club

Honestly what a good anime, we all know how iconic the OP and ED are but what about the OST? I have a bias for orchestral themes and OHSHC delivers that in spades. They have so many funny tracks that perfectly evoke the crack energy of the lads and Haruhi, as well as some nostalgic ballads that sweep you right off your feet. “Polka Capriccioso” is their anthem, the minute I heard this again I started laughing. Then you have emotional tracks like “Nocturne for Orchestra” and “Pavan for Piano and Orchestra”. There’s not a single bad track, (which goes for most of the OST’s on here) and honestly I’ll be incorporating some of these tracks into my playlist.

“OHSHC fans rolling up to every social function to be as LGBTQIA+ as possible.”

8. Beastars

I love this jazzy anime!!! Like yasss!!! So melodramatic and angsty!!! This show just has a really good soundtrack, it was really hard not to list everything lol. “Beastars - Classical”, “Beastars - Another Side” and “Hope of this World” have my heart forevermore, while “Impending Darkness” and “Louis’ Feelings” are fucking BOPS! We don’t talk about “Bite Me!”…

“There’s no shoujo filter, you’re just a furry.”

7. Dr. Stone

I DUNNO HOW I MISSED THIS SOUNDTRACK OR JUST FAILED TO APPRECIATE IT, BUT MAYBE I WAS TOO ENTHRALLED WITH ALL THE SCIENCE HAPPENING TO PAY ATTENTION? WHAT THE FUCK I HAVE GOOSEBUMPS?? HOLY SHIT THIS SOUNDTRACK IS SO EPIC???? JUST GO LISTEN TO THE WHOLE THING I GUESS, NOT A SINGLE BAD TRACK. I WOULD RANK IT HIGHER BUT I JUST STARTED LISTENING TO IT WISNSOALSPDK. THIS COULD EASILY BE IN MY TOP 3.

“Me ascending to a higher plane while listening to the Dr. Stone OST.”

6. Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood

I can already hear the FMAB hardcore fans screaming about “FMAB IS PEAK FICTION!!! BEST ANIME EVER!!! THAT INCLUDES ITS SOUNDTRACK!!! IT SHOULD BE IN FIRST PLACE [gamer slur] [death threat]”. Shut up. I love FMAB, and my god when I hear “The Fullmetal Alchemist” and “Trisha’s Lullaby” am I frozen to the spot. I knew FMAB would go down as one of my favourite animes when it made me cry on the second episode. I watched this anime in 2020 and I still get nostalgia hearing the music. My two other faves are “Concerto ~ Brotherhood” and “Overture ~ Brotherhood”. Fitting since these two are my favourite brothers in fiction.

“Anime fans happy to see that FMAB didn’t take 1st place for something anime related.”

5. Toilet Bound Hanako-kun

OOOOOOOOH BOY!!! I first thought TBHK was just gonna be some pastel middle school reverse harem anime, but I was wrong, wrong, wrong! I love this anime and it’s music so much, I was listening to my fave tracks for a solid month straight. Also during 2021 I would just listen to a piano version of Tiny Lights during my online maths classes and sob my heart out. Maths is very stressful. This anime has RANGE!!! It has a lot of good comedic tracks, spooooky tracks and ROMANTIC ones. “Tomo Tomo” and “Firindotto” are such endearing tracks to hear, while “Fantasuteriasu” is downright ICONIC, but my absolutely favourite would obviously have to be “Sutarakushon”.

“TBHK fans when they get a Nene x Hanako moment right after being emotionally destroyed.”

4. My Hero Academia

I didn’t want to put My Hero Academia on the list. I’m not even up to date with the anime/manga — I’m still on S3. I have a love hate relationship with this show but goddamn does this OST make me so emotional. It makes me feel like I can do anything, and I can’t ignore that raw emotion. My Hero Academia was one of my first anime, I have to show it some love. My favourite tracks from S1 would be: “You Can Be A Hero”, “HERO A” and “My Hero Academia”. For S2: “You Say Run” (obviously), “Eiyuuteki Butou Sentoukyoku” and “Bakusatsuou”. Finally for S3 (which I never finished 💀) my absolute fave has to be “Bakugo’s Rescue Soundtrack”. THOSE DRUMS!!!! I SCREAM EVERY TIME!!!

“MHA fans when “You Say Run” starts playing.”

3. Hunter X Hunter

Oh yeah!! I started watching HXH because I found out the Among Us betrayed music was from the show, no that’s not a joke. I have also listened to Hyori Ittai an unhealthy amount of times. Probably my all time favourite song to ever exist, but we’re talking about OSTs! Truly the tracks for this anime are beyond iconic, you hear that music and you know it’s time for nostalgia. The thing with HXH is that it has so many OSTs and no, it’s not cheating to talk about all of them. My favourite tracks from the first would be: “The Silver-Haired Boy” and “The Silver-Haired Lullaby”. For the second OST my faves would be: “Zoldyck Family Theme”, “Go on Gon!”, and “Departure for Strings”. From the Phantom Rouge OST: “The Red-Eyed Monster” and “Emperor’s Time”. Finally the last OST, and holy shit is that an OST to contend with: “Kingdom of Predators”, “Hyori Ittai Lamento for Piano” and “Elegy of the Dynast”.

“HXH fans after hearing that HXH is never going to have an ending for the 1246396481623748292638 time.”

2. The Promised Neverland

There are no words for how much I love this soundtrack. It was originally going to be first, but I remembered one other anime with an OST that I’ve listened to religiously. If I liked a background song in an anime I’d try and find it, but TPN was the anime that got me to actually go find and listen to the OST. Even for the No. 1 anime OST. This OST is so haunting and ethereal, adding to the bittersweet tragedy of the show. Those motherfuckers bottled raw emotion in their music. My favourites would be “The Promised Neverland Track 1”, “Isabella’s Lullaby”, “Emma’s Sorrow” and “Emma’s Determination”.

(Edit: I forgot about how good Ray’s Retaliation is and how fun Dancing Krone is.)

“Ah fuck, ran out of ways to slaughter anime fans— ah well, Cloverworks already covered that with TPN S2.”

1. Violet Evergarden

I’ve listened to and enjoyed almost every single track in this OST. Each one is meticulously crafted in a way that adds to the world of Violet Evergarden. Everything about this anime is beautiful and the music, a thing of perfection in itself elevates the anime to where it is. There is not a single bad or boring track. Watch the anime and listen to the OST.

“‘Bwuwuhhwhhuwbbwbb’ - average Violet Evergarden fan trying to convince you to watch the show”

[pippenpaddlopsicopolisthethird]

That person might not have said top ten but I would like to see the other five underrated animes 👀

(First post) I’LL KEEP ‘EM COMING, I LIVE FOR RECOMMENDING ANIME. I keep changing my mind on which ones to include because there’s so much good shit out there.

By the way, all of the recommendations in this list AND the last one are 26 episodes or less and tell a complete story. No cliffhangers, no “finish the manga to see the finale”, no “where’s the rest of it???” endings. That’s why, for now, Stars Align and Princess Jellyfish still get stuck with the honorable mentions even though what’s been made for both of them is incredible.

1. The Tatami Galaxy (Drama, Introspective)

The director behind Ping Pong the Animation and the original author behind Eccentric Family join forces to make Tatami Galaxy, which capitalizes on the best strengths of both shows. The protagonist is a lonely college student facing the prospect of graduating after having thoroughly wasted his college years. He bemoans how circumstances outside of his control, from conniving fake-friends to selfish and shallow extras, have conspired to ruin what should have been a “rose-colored campus life”, and wishes he could do it over again so he can get it right.

So he does, with the show using avant-garde animation and abstract storytelling to explore all of his threads of what-ifs. The plotlines seem separate but weave together and subtly build on each other, culminating to a finale that explores the meaning of relationships and who you are in the absence of outside forces that can define you. It’s heartfelt, funny, raunchy, and deep, and perfectly encapsulates the existential dread of being in college. I watched it for the first time when I was about to finish undergrad and it hit like an emotional freight train, then I rewatched it during quarantine and it hit like a truck. This is one of my top favorite anime of all time.

2. Re:Creators (Fantasy, action)

Most of the anime I’ve put on these lists get their spots for being deep, nuanced, and delicately crafted. This is not one of them. But, by god, is it one of the most over-the-top fun shows I’ve ever seen. Re:Creators is a rare reverse-isekai. Fictional characters from popular anime, games, and manga suddenly start turning up in the real world, instructed to “find your Creator and reshape the world you came from”. The soundtrack by Hiroyuki Sawano is bar-none one of the hypest things out there; seriously, just listen to Layers, the song for a character from a grimdark everyone-dies series begging her author to tell her why.

The characters in this show are so fun to watch bounce off each other, even if they’re not as “three dimensional” as others. Magical girls fight Stand users, mechs face down scifi-noir detectives, Lawful Good Paladins go toe-to-toe with Chaotic Evil light novel villains.  But by including the artists who imagined these characters as characters themselves, it also has a lot to say about the creative process, the reasons people create, and the relationship between an artist and their work. Between the high-octane fight scenes, there’s a surprisingly human and genuine throughline.

3. Sora no Woto (Slice of life, music, post-apocalyptic)

This show is another of my favorite examples of worldbuilding done right. A young girl joins the army as a bugler because it’s one of the only ways she can learn to play music. The episode plots focus on how she and her tiny regiment of young women stationed at a small town in the middle of nowhere deal with day-to-day troubles, while the details of the world around them slowly fill and round out the picture of a broken society where people still just... live. They still create myths, they still have festivals, they still blow glass and tell ghost stories and make art. The plots seem inconsequential, until the world built into the background becomes too prominent to ignore. The background art and music is some of the most gorgeous I’ve seen. It’s part of a genre I’ve been calling “soft apocalypse” and it’s been one of my favorites for years.

BONUS MENTION: Girl’s Last Tour (Slice of life, post-apocalyptic)

Yes, I’m cheating, but listen. Girl’s Last Tour fits perfectly into the canon narrative provided by Sora no Woto, just set in the far future, a few apocalypses later. It’s got less of a main plot, because there’s almost nothing of society left, just two girls wandering together through an abandoned world. It’s soft, introspective, and bittersweet, showing how humanity is still humanity no matter how few people are left. Despite having nothing about their productions in common, it’s the perfect spiritual successor to Sora no Woto and they deserve to be recommended in the same spot.

4. Tamako Market (+ the movie) (Romance, slice-of-life)

This show is the platonic ideal of a soft, heartwarming, sweet-as-sugar, slice-of-life romance. It follows the daily life of Tamako, a high school girl who lives above a family-owned mochi shop in a shopping center, who is followed around by a talking bird trying to find a bride for his prince in a far-off land. But really the show isn’t about the bird. The show is about love in all its forms. The love that the other families in the shopping center have for Tamako, the love that she and her friends have for each other, the love they have for the activities they’re passionate about, the love you feel when someone makes you a cup of coffee, fated love, childhood crushes, family love.

Something about this show that also stands out is how gently and naturally it incorporates some of the best queer representation I’ve ever seen in anime. One of the shop owners is a kind and soft-spoken trans woman, who is never the butt of a joke, never questioned, never treated as different, loved all the same. One of Tamako’s friends is gay, and her crush on Tamako is treated with as much respect and care as every other moment in the show. This series never makes you flinch for fear of “representation” that turns sour. It’s the epitome of a feel-good show.

5. ACCA 13-Territory Inspection Department (Political, mystery, drama)

Yes, I keep saving my favorites for last on these lists. I can’t describe this show as anything but the perfectly written plot. As a rule, I don’t like political dramas, and this is one of my favorite anime of all time. It’s set in a fictional country, where 13 regions all exist relatively independently under one collective monarchical ruler, and follows Jean, an agent of the independent Inspection Department, which acts as a check and balance to each power. The series begins with Jean being assigned a full review of each territory while the powers-that-be field whispers of a coup. This show masters foreshadowing, intrigue, escalation, and mystery. The stakes build and overlap on scales from intensely personal to national. The pacing is amazing, keeping tension balanced with plot twists that answer more questions than they ask.

Plus, it’s got one of the most visually appealing and stylized openings out there. I realize that political drama isn’t exactly escapism right now, but believe me, this series is worth it.

[imagines-r-s]

sticking it - j. farabee

chapter 7

a/n: besties, it’s here. this is so wholesome, i swear to god. i don’t really have much else to say, but i do plan on continuing writing fics for the ‘sticking it’ universe?? (idk if that’s the right way to word that) so if you have requests for fics that still follow y/n and joel after the olympics or even throughout the series, i will gladly accept those requests. feedback is welcome, please enjoy

taglist: @butgilinsky @barbienoturbby @sunsetholland​ @lovenhlboys @sortagaysortahigh @hockey-racing-fubol @oopsiedoopsie23 @iwantahockeyhimbo @dreamsndior

warnings: high school musical, an annoying amount of fluff, maybe another your mom joke, bestie adrian

sticking it masterlist

wc: 3.0k

(gif not mine)

As soon as the boys got back from the roadie, everyone was ready to go home and sleep in their own bed. Winning two of the three games during the trip, most of the guys had been running on adrenaline, but were ready to crash. 

When Joel entered his apartment, still in his suit, ready to go to bed, he was shocked to see that some of his lights and his tv were on. He knew that he had double checked to make sure that they were off, but when he saw a pair of crutches leaning near where his couch was he quickly figured out why. 

He took note of the way you had fallen asleep on his couch, still in one of his jerseys, and with your phone still in your hand. “Hey, babe, wake up,” he spoke softly which caused you to simply groan in response and turn around, “y/n/n, c’mon.”

Turning back around to face him, you smiled, which quickly dropped seconds later as you realized you had intended to stay awake to see him, “oh my god, I was supposed to stay awake to surprise you.”

“Aw, don’t stress it. Seeing you here was a really good surprise either way.”

“Bee, can you do me a favor?” you asked, starting to get up. He simply hummed in response, “do you think you could step outside, act like you haven’t come in here yet, and act shocked once you get back?”

“You’re so dramatic, I swear.”

“Ah, ah, ah, I just want to know if you’ll walk back outside,” you said, smiling as he rolled his eyes before turning around and walking out of the door, “make sure you close the door for even more dramatic effect.”

Joel simply rolled his eyes once more before walking back into his apartment, “oh my gosh, babe, what a surprise to see you here. Never expected that one, that’s insane.” 

“Thank you,” you yawned, “I kinda missed you, not gonna lie.”

“Kinda?”

“Yes, I will not admit to anything more.”

“Ok, I missed you,too. C’mon, let’s go to bed though,” he grabbed your crutches from beside the couch and brought them to you. 

“I’m fine just going home,” you said, but once you yawned again, you knew he would immediately reject that idea. 

“You are way too tired to drive right now.”

“I have physical therapy tomorrow and if I stay here-”

“I’ll take you there tomorrow or at least just make sure you’re up in time, don’t stress it. Now, c’mon, you need some sleep,” he said, ushering you towards his room. As he started walking, he paused halfway through the hall, “wait, how’d you get in here?”

“I took a locksmith class once,” you said, shrugging, which only left him more confused. 

 “Um, alright,” he said as the two of you made your way towards his room. As you entered, you noticed the various pictures and hockey related things in his room. pictures of the team, along with pictures of his friends and family, pucks from his first nhl goal and his first hat trick sitting on one of the shelves. 

As you glanced around his room, you took note of how his room wasn’t a mess, but it wasn’t completely clean either. taking a seat on his bed, you set your crutches off to the side near his bed. “As much as I love seeing you in my jersey, I don't think it’s the best thing to sleep in,” Joel said, throwing you one of his shirts. 

“Awe, pretty boy. That’s very sweet. as much as I love seeing you in your suit, it might not be the best thing to sleep in. Might I suggest just sweatpants?” you asked, smiling sweetly. 

“Just sweatpants?” he asked, looking for confirmation that he heard what you said correctly. Taking the nod he got in response as confirmation, he grabbed a pair of black sweatpants from his dresser, “I’ll be back in a sec, you need anything?”

“No, I’m okay, but thank you, Bee,” as soon as he left, you got ready for bed. As soon as you laid down, you tried to stay awake to talk to Joel about his games, but sleep soon overtook you. 

When Joel got back, he smiled at seeing you asleep in his bed. After setting down the water bottle he got you, even though you said you didn’t need anything, he got into bed. Turning on his music, he turned towards you and wrapped his arms around you with his chest to your back. 

He quickly moved his arms when he felt you turn, only to smile when you wrapped your arms around him with your face nestled in the crook of his neck, “goodnight, Bee.”

“Goodnight, babe,” seeing as you had already fallen back asleep, he quietly whispered, “I love you.” 

When Joel woke up to an empty bed, he tried to avoid the assumption that you had heard what he said and had left him again. He knew it was bad to think, but that was the first place his mind went.

Getting out of bed to go to the bathroom, he heard music coming from the kitchen. As he walked closer to the kitchen, he heard the familiar soundtrack of High School Musical 3 playing, you singing along as you cracked an egg into the frying pan. 

As you listened to the last part of ‘A Night to Remember’, you didn’t even notice Joel standing in the doorway watching you. You were in your own little world. As you used the spatula as a microphone, you did a turn and you shrieked as you noticed him leaning on the doorway, “god, Bee, what the fuck are you doing just standing there?”

“I didn’t want to interrupt your karaoke session,” he stated, pushing off the wall to walk closer to you. 

“You weren’t supposed to see that.” 

“Don’t be upset, it was adorable.”

“I’m not trying to be adorable,” you scowled, turning back to the eggs that were still cooking. Feeling Joel stand right behind you, holding onto your hips as he dipped his head to kiss your neck, “better watch yourself, Farabee.”

“Babe, I’m just messing with you. Whatcha making?”

“Well, right now I’m making eggs and I was about to start the pancakes,” you said, listening as the song changed to ‘Just Wanna Be With You’, smiling as you heard Joel mumbling the words into the crook of your neck. 

“Babe, c’mon, it’s a duet. So you have to ‘do it’, you know?” he said, taking a step back from you, grabbing onto your waist once more to spin you around to face him, as he started obnoxiously singing the words. 

“Maybe you should stick to hockey, Bee. Singing is not your forte,” you said, laughing. 

“You’re ruining the moment, sweet pea,” he said, spinning you around. You joined him in the singing and dancing, laughing whenever either of you messed up the words. As the last words rang out, his lips met yours, you smiled into the kiss as you heard ‘The Boys Are Back’ start to play. 

“You guys should listen to this in the locker room, I think it’s perfect for game days,” you smiled, double checking the eggs once more. 

“Oh, yeah? I’ll make sure to mention it to them.” 

The two of you ate your breakfast in comfortable silence before getting ready for your PT appointment, you borrowing another one of Joel’s shirts to wear with the leggings you had worn the day before. 

“I want to warn you,” you started as Joel parked the car, “Adrian is kinda a handful. He’s super nice, but he’s, uh. He’s Adrian.”

“Got it, alright,” he said, genuinely unsure of what was about to go down. 

Lacing your hand in his, you led the way to Adrian’s office, walking right in as you saw that his door was open, “ooh, it’s my Olympic Superstar,” he said, quickly glancing behind you, “ooh, and the hockey superstar? Okay.” 

“Hi, Adrian,” you sat down on the bench, Joel sitting in the chair beside you, “ this is Joel Farabee. Bee, this is Adrian Michael.”

“I see why you were super nervous to text him, he’s pretty,” Adrian said, removing your knee brace, “she literally threw the phone right after texting you one day, it was so funny.”

“Adrian, your face is right by my leg, if I kick my leg hard enough, I could easily do some damage.”

“Awe, babe. Don’t be mean. Adrian, what else happened?” Joel said, smirking. 

“Oh, I like him, I approve,” Adrian said, glancing up to see you hiding your face with your hands, “I told her she was a dumbass for not talking to you about how she felt, but I’m assuming she did that since you’re here right now.” 

“Yeah, I agree, she is kinda a dumbass at times,” Joel said, trying not to laugh.

“You’re a dumbass, too, so don’t even,” you said, shooting a glare his way.

“Alright, kids. I can tell you’re the perfect match for each other, but good news is your knee is getting better. I can tell you actually listened to what I told you to do this time around,” he said, grabbing some athletic tape,” I know the two weeks aren’t exactly done, but you only have two days left, so I’m going to wrap up your knee for now. But you can start training, minimal pressure on your legs , no hard landings, no vault or tumbling,  you know the deal. But keep up what you’re doing, you’ll be all set to start training as soon as a week.”

“Wait, really?” you smiled as he nodded in response. 

“But you have to be smart about your training. Stick to mainly conditioning and drills for right now, only do pit landings if you need to work on any dismounts, actually use the athletic tape, and if you feel any pain, you let me know ASAP.”

“Ok, cool,” you smiled, ready to go to the gym now. 

“Knowing you, you’ll be at the gym later tonight, but don’t do anything dumb,” Adrian said, rolling his eyes, “and keep her line, pretty boy.”

“I’ll try my best,” Joel said, smiling. 

“Alright, you should be all set then. Good luck, superstar.”

“Thanks, Adrian,” you said as you walked out the door. 

…..

Joel knew that you wanted to go to the gym to at least do something since you were finally able to, so he took you to your apartment to get your gym bag right after lunch. As soon as you got there, you asked Michelle and Marcus if you would be able to have some time in the back gym - which was essentially the same as the main gym, it just held some of the older, but still safe, equipment. 

Setting your bag down, you decided to start on floor with basic skills, just to get in the groove of doing actual skills again. Stretching first, you made your way to the floor to get started. As you got back into doing some easy skills - with no harsh landings, obviously - you made your way to beam and bars, knowing that vault would be too hard on you right now. 

You were able to work on some of the skills that you had done for years now, there were only a few things that you couldn’t work on that weren’t dismounts or tumbling. You were just happy to be back to where you felt most at home. 

As you did your cool down workout, you had gotten your phone out, scrolling through twitter to see the usual mentions that you would see on the daily. But recently, there were a lot more negative things said, more comparison to your teammates and competitors, and people doubting that you deserved this. 

Joel quickly saw the way your face fell as you looked at your phone, he could only assume that you had seen something that had completely ruined how happy you were. He reached over to grab the phone from your hands, “what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, Bee. Don’t worry about it,” you said, trying to grab the phone from his hand. 

“y/n/n, I know something is up, what happened?”

“Just people saying shit, it’s nothing.”

“See, on any regular occasion, it would be nothing. You block whoever, yeah, yeah, yeah. But we’re talking about the Olympics here, babe. Everyone here supports and believes in you, so what you do is, you go out there and you prove to those people that you deserve your spot. The only opinion that matters is yours at the end of the day,” he smiled, “so, are you going to let them get to you? Or are you going to prove them wrong?”

“I mean proving them wrong is probably the better option, you know,” you said, jokingly. 

“Let’s try that answer again. Which one are you going to do?”

“Prove them wrong.”

“That’s my girl,” he said, leaving you stunned for a moment as he helped you get your gym bag together. When he noticed you still standing there, he quickly turned around, “are you okay?” 

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. You just said ‘my girl’, I just - I wasn’t expecting it.”

“Did I just make the y/n y/l/n flustered? Awe, and she’s blushing. Oh my god, are you guys seeing this?” he yelled out to the empty gym, “Hm, and there for a minute I didn’t think you felt anything.”

“Shut the fuck up, Farabee,” you said, rolling your eyes. 

“And we’re back to our regularly scheduled programming,” he said, mocking an announcer’s voice. 

“You’re an idiot, Bee.”

“I’m your idiot, though,” he said simply, leaving no room for debate. 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” you smiled, the two of you walking back towards his car with your hands intertwined. 

…..

As the days passed on, since you still had limited practice time, you were able to attend games and team celebrations as the Flyers got closer to the playoffs. Karly even convinced you to sit with her and the other WAGs at a few games. 

“Hm, it’s almost like I told you that you would end up sitting up here with us one day,” Karly said, rolling her eyes. 

“Yes, Karly, you did indeed say that,” you grumbled. 

“Awe, Sunshine, it’s okay to admit that you’re wrong sometimes.”

“I strongly disagree,” the two of you made your way back to your seats, smiling when you saw Joel messing around with Phil during warm up. 

“You are so in love with him, it’s crazy,” Ryanne said as she sat down beside you. 

“What? No- not today. I tolerate him more than I tolerate most people, but I don’t love him,” you rushed out, still in shock from what you had just heard. 

“Just because you don’t say it out loud doesn’t mean it’s not true, you know,” Karly added. 

“Yeah, but- that’s kinda scary,” you sighed, looking out onto the ice as you saw Joel laughing at something Nolan had said. 

“Love is scary sometimes, but with the right person, it’s super easy to do. It happens, but you better not run away from it this time. You both deserve it and you’re both happy, so don’t run,” Ryanne said, holding Gavin on her lap. 

You didn’t say anything in response, simply watching as the game started. This game was the last game that they had before the playoff games, so you could visibly see the tension rolling through the team as the game started. 

By the second period, the game was tied - Joel, Nolan, and Claude having scored . Third period was their make it or break it moment, so everyone in the stands was watching intently as the period started. As the period progressed, both goalies were doing a great job of keeping goals from being scored, meaning that by the end of the third period the score was still tied. 

With no points being made during overtime, a shootout was set to happen. Karly quickly gripped your hand as the two of you watched as Nolan skated onto the ice. “Nolan, c’mon, you got this,” you mumbled mostly to yourself. Watching intently as Nolan started skating towards the goal, watching as he made his way towards the goal, pulling his stick back and hitting the puck. Right into the goal. 

The whole arena erupted in cheers as the boys celebrated, you and the other WAGs smiling as you watched the team that had grown so much this season make more progress towards their main goal. As spectators left the arena, you made your way down to the tunnel to wait on Joel. 

You waited anxiously for Joel to exit, your eyes glued to the door every time you heard it open, “you watching the door isn’t going to make him leave any faster. Trust me, I’ve tried,” Ryanne said, smiling. 

“Yeah, I’m still going to try it though,” you laughed. 

“Figured.” 

You spent some time holding Gavin, trying to get him to sleep, so that Ryanne wouldn’t have to worry about it, “you know, you’re really good with kids.”

“Ah, ah, ah. You already brought up me being in love with Bee earlier, I’m not having this conversation,” you said, looking up to see Ryanne watching behind you. 

“You’re in love with me?” a familiar voice said from behind you, causing you to almost give yourself whiplash as you turned around. 

“Uh, hi, Bee,” the tension in your body immediately dissipated when you saw the smile that was now on his face, “yeah, Bee. I love you.”

“I love you, too,” he said, softly before his lips met yours gently. “I don’t think this day could get any better.” 

“It would be a lot better if you didn’t kiss her in front of me, Beezer,” Kevin’s voice boomed from the other side of the hallway. 

“What was that, Hayesy? It almost sounded like you said something, I don’t know for sure though,” Joel said, wrapping his hand around your waist. 

“I’m proud of you, babe. You did it,” you whispered, leaning into his side. 

“Dude, imagine. ‘Stanley Cup Champion dating Olympic Gymnastics Champion,’ I like the sounds of that.”

“Hate to break it to you, but it would definitely be ‘Olympic Gymnastics Gold Medalist dating Stanley Cup Champion. You know the Olympics are kind of a big deal.”

[slipping-through-my-fingertips]

Music for the Soul

Summary: Soulmate AU where the song your soulmate is thinking of gets stuck in your head. 

This fic is inspired by and gifted to @yellowpaintpots.

Notes:  canonical, this is S2 E6 and a little beyond but it’s not exactly like the show obviously.

AO3

Kurt Hummel was used to not fitting in. At McKinley High, he was often an odd man out. He did partner projects alone, he held his tongue around bullies and had no one to complain to, and most days, he had an entire lunch table to himself. No one sat with the kid in weird, homemade clothes unless there was no other choice. 

What kept him going was music. He had one earbud in as he walked down the halls. Choosing from playlists his mother used to listen to, Broadway soundtracks sung by people still performing on stage today, and to the thrill of his father, rock classics. If Burt Hummel had passed anything onto his son, it was his music tastes and the fantastical idea of soulmates. 

The image of a white knight coming to save him by serenade was one that haunted him before he fell asleep. A boy, which little eleven-year-old Kurt held close to his heart, picked out by the universe meant just for him. Even when he started to find the fantasy a little too cheesy, it kept Kurt going until he found the glee club.

No one could touch him or change him because there was someone out there who would love him exactly the way he was. 

The New Directions were a hot mess when they started, of course. The 5 of them weren’t winning any competitions when they first found themselves in the choir room but they were five misfits who finally had friends. People who understood the passion of music and an adult who shared that same passion and would hopefully guide them to their dream futures. 

Just months later, they became a mixture of a dozen sophomores and freshmen with a Sectionals win under their belt all ready to face the Dalton Academy Warblers in a few weeks. With Regionals looming over them, glee had become much messier than usual. With plenty of in-fighting about solos and song choices, the choir room was always a jumbled, loud mess. That is until Mr. Schue came up with the idea for a school musical. It was taking their minds off of Regionals for the time being.

Kurt was all too happy to be auditioning for a role instead of sitting in the back row wishing he had a shot at a solo. His voice was too unique for Ohio. But someday, he knew, it would get him to Broadway. He held that thought close to his heart while tuning out Rachel’s insistence bickering.  

Yesterday, Mr. Schue had decided their school musical was going to the Rocky Horror Picture Show. Kurt loved cult classics as much as the next person but he wasn’t sure how Mr. Schue had gotten this approved by Figgins. It seemed too risqué for high schoolers. 

He only hoped whoever his soulmate was enjoying the soundtrack he had stuck in his head this week. 

Kurt planned on auditioning for Riff Raff. Already putting mental outfits from his closet to wear. The wound of Mr. Schue assuming he’d play Frank N. Furter based solely on the fact that he was gay was still fresh but his audition was going to blow everyone away. 

He had chosen “Dammit Janet” for his audition despite it being a Brad and Janet duet. Quinn, who was hoping for Magenta, was going to be his partner. They had joked about the main roles already being off the table before auditions; it was clear Mr. Schue had chosen Finn and Rachel for the leads. It was hard to be upset when Quinn had instantly offered to do a joint audition with him. Their voices went so well together and Kurt liked spending time with her. 

Ever since Kurt and Mercedes had their stint as Cheerios, they had gotten closer. The three of them even had a weekend sleepover this past Saturday. Mercedes had dumped the Cheerios but Kurt stayed on and Quinn had just gotten back on the squad after her dismissal last year. Coach Sue had them sing during practice last week and Quinn was waiting for him after their showers with the suggestion of a double audition song. 

They had been having rehearsals in the auditorium during their shared free period and twice after glee club on days when it wasn’t already reserved. As the day came closer, Quinn offered her house to practice in since her parents were rarely home and so Finn wouldn’t become Rachel's spy. Though, Kurt assured her Finn was much too engrossed in video games to bother with their rehearsals. 

Since they increased their run-throughs, Kurt’s had one song in his head all morning. In case the lyrics weren’t already ingrained into his head, he had his own little concert in his head. Just after lunch, that changed. A mere 3 hours until his audition after school his soulmate’s music had taken root. As much as Kurt was willing to bow down to the queens of pop, what he wouldn’t give for 5 minutes of something other than Katy Perry’s “Teenage Dream”. This bubble gum pop song had gone from ‘oh, that’s a good song to scream in the car’ to ‘if I hear it one more time, I’ll rip my ears off’ fairly quickly. 

It hadn’t helped that his brain went from one song on repeat to another. 

As he sits in geometry, he tries to hear Mr. Finnegan’s explanation of arcs but his brain has other plans. 

Let you put your hands on me in my skin tight jeans. 

Kurt knows it’s just a song but the image is so clear in his head. 

Smooth, soft skin. Obviously, someone who used lotions regularly, Kurt expected nothing less from his soulmate. Neatly trimmed fingernails so they wouldn’t catch on Kurt’s pants when fingers trailed up to cup his knee. The grip would be teasingly light. He never let his fantasies get too far. Especially outside the privacy of his bedroom. In all honesty, even when he was alone in his bed at night envisioning the same kind of scenario, Kurt didn’t really know what came next. He wasn’t even sure what kissing really entailed. 

What if his soulmate is ready for...certain things...Kurt’s not even to verbalize yet. What if he’s imagining their first meeting very differently then Kurt, who’s hopeful they’ll have coffee or a meal together before they do anything besides maybe hand-holding. The touch of the fingertips is as sexy as it gets, unless you ask Katy Perry it seems. 

He spends the rest of math wondering what the boy with Katy Perry in his head must look like. Kurt wonders if his soulmate wears bright colors like his idol or maybe Katy is a secret shame that he’ll only share with Kurt. 

…

Blaine liked fitting in. He enjoyed the uniform for many reasons. One, he thought the blazer looked stylish. It was also nice knowing what you had to wear every day, one less thing to worry about people judging you for. Plenty of people at his old school picked on him for his bow ties but at Dalton, everyone had neckwear. The standard blue and red striped tie. He liked how neat it was; there was a certain way to wear said uniform. 

Everyone was the same here. No typical hierarchy of jocks and cheerleaders. Only the Warblers stood out simply because everyone knew them. 

How could you forget a group of boys singing acapella at all hours of the day?

 Blaine might joke that they’re teenage rockstars but really they are just a group of talented guys who liked to sing. 

The Warblers were the first real friends he ever had. 

When he was still attending public school he held tightly to the idea of his soulmate since it seemed hopeless to wish for friendship. Not when he was being harassed for a sexuality he wasn’t sure of yet and being pushed to the ground in the parking lot for it. 

But a soulmate was a guarantee. Everyone had one. By the time Blaine reached eighth grade, he knew. All of those middle school bullies had used words Blaine didn’t quite understand until that moment. 

He was surrounded in the parking lot after school having missed his bus because someone had stuck gum in his curls during last period. That was the day Blaine started to seriously consider investing in some gel. Maybe that would prevent some bullying. Anyway, he was surrounded, being literally kicked around by a group of soccer players and friends. 

Other students had gathered to watch the so-called fight but Blaine thought their chants would only grab the attention of a teacher or so he hoped. No one came quickly. He had enough injuries by the end for his mom to insist on a trip to the ER. A big black eye and sprained his wrist along with plenty of bruising on his limbs. 

But he honestly didn’t remember getting hurt beyond the initial pushing to the ground. When the bullying got bad like this he pulled out those daydreams. This time around it wasn’t this blurry image of hand holding, there was a boy. Blaine hadn’t seen his face but his voice was soft and comforting, inviting Blaine in. There was an outstretched hand just out of reach for Blaine to take. Blaine knew then. His soulmate was a boy. 

When everything was over and he was being released by the doctor, all he knew was there was some boy built perfectly for Blaine just waiting to be found. Waiting for him. 

He hadn’t even been upset by his injuries because he was sitting with these thoughts of ‘how do I come out to my parents?’ 

Instead of deciding that day, he kept those daydreams close to his heart for the next year and a half. Until the issue of high school came out and Blaine didn’t want to go back to public school. To his surprise, both of his parents took it well. They were more concerned for his safety than his sexuality. Together, they decided on Dalton. A private school with a zero tolerance policy for bullies. That was that. 

He still had his doubts at Dalton. Was he really good enough to be a lead soloist let alone go onto Broadway someday? Could he make it out of Ohio? In those moments, Blaine still came back to his soulmate. Someone, no matter what came, Blaine would have by his side. 

When he imagined his soulmate, Blaine could never truly figure out what he’d look like. All he saw was that outstretched hand. Usually, people could draw up a picture in their heads based on the music they heard. 

For Blaine, the genre of music didn’t help. His soulmate was clearly someone with mixed taste. 

Today’s selection was...a musical. Blaine wasn’t familiar with the characters Brad and Janet but he had looked it up at lunch. Some kind of cult classic people went to see in the weeks leading up to Halloween. It was October so it made sense for the soundtrack to be stuck in his soulmate’s head. Blaine wondered if he had gone to see it, wondered who he saw it with. 

The Warblers thought he was crazy. Imagining that his soulmate was off with some other person. It was rare to date seriously before meeting a soulmate but Blaine always told them the same story of his parents. Both of them had been in very serious relationships before they met. Hell, his mother had been engaged. Neither of them thought they’d meet their soulmate, which was also fairly rare but had happened.  

When they met, they didn’t drop everything to be together. The wedding was put on hold but his father hadn’t broken up with his girlfriend right away. His parents wanted to be together only if they agreed with the universe’s choice. 

Blaine knew his dad had been wary of his mother’s music taste. Pam had been deep into her metal phrase in her early twenties. His dad, Robert, was not a fan. He loved classical music. Forever dooming Pam to hum music without lyrics meanwhile Robert was cursed with “nonsense yelling” as he called it. Lucky, both of their music tastes had shifted over the years to have more overlap. Though, Blaine and Cooper had been subjected to dinners with a mixtape of Def Leppard and Bach. 

They got together in the end, which was the important part, but what if they hadn’t chosen each other? What if Blaine’s soulmate was deeply in love with someone else and he’d spend the rest of his days loveless and alone?

When he voiced these thoughts aloud, his friends usually told him what a downer he could be, which tended to shake those fears away. If his parents, different as they were, still fell in love it would happen to him too. It was just a matter of when. 

…

The next day at lunch, Mercedes was fretting over her soulmate. 

“What if he’s super young, Kurt?” 

“What makes you think that?” He asked, stabbing his salad. 

“He’s got The Backyardigans theme song in his head again,” she sighed. “He got to be like 7. I’m just not comfortable with that.” 

“It’s an age gap for sure,” Kurt agreed, but he’s fairly sure Sam Evans was singing that song after PE today, “or maybe he just has younger siblings. Don’t let your only-childness cloud your judgment.”

She hummed in agreement and pushed her tater tots around. 

It was sort of a hard way to figure out your soulmate unless they were obvious about what music they had playing in their heads.

Some people, like Mr. Schue, we’re pretty obvious. He had been singing in the auditorium when Ms. Pillsbury found him. It was a pretty clear-cut match. As far as Mercedes was concerned, Kurt is sure she’ll overhear Sam’s humming soon enough. 

He doesn’t want to spoil anything for his best friend nor does he want to be wrong. Soulmate meetings only come once in a lifetime. 

Well, the first soulmate meeting that is. 

There are plenty of people, like his dad, who lose a soulmate too soon and are gifted another one later in life. Kurt was so happy when he introduced Burt and Carole at parent-teacher conferences. They had just been listening to the Wicked soundtrack in the car ride over and Carole Hudson did not strike Kurt as the type of person who knew “I’m Not That Girl” by heart. 

“Are you nervous about auditions?” Mercedes asked. “The list goes up today after glee.” 

“Not at all like,” he shrugged, “I think Quinn and I did well.” 

“Oh no, Kurt, we crushed it,” Quinn said, sitting down with her lunch. 

He smiled at her. Quinn went on to compliment Mercedes on her audition, having heard part of it from outside the audition. She would’ve been inside with Kurt to watch but Coach Sue wanted to meet with her head Cheerio about their upcoming competition. From what Quinn had told them via text, Sue was going all out at practice today. 

“She doesn’t want us to be late,” Quinn said. “That list better be up right away.” 

“We should change before glee,” Kurt suggested. 

“Good idea.” 

Once Quinn had sat down the rest of the New Directions filed in. With interlocking pinkies, Santana and Brittany wandered over taking the last two seats available. 

“Cheerios practice is gonna be hell, hope you’re up for the challenge Hummel,” Santana said. 

He shot her a short glare. 

“Kurt always understands the assignment, Santana,” Quinn quipped back. 

Brittany nodded in agreement smiling at Kurt from across the table. She gave him a small wave half hidden by her lunch tray. In return, Kurt waved back just as shyly. 

They had an interesting friendship. Kurt had kissed Brittany before. He was sure it hadn’t phrased Brittany as it had him. After all, she had kissed almost every boy in school. Some kind of record, he thought. 

They sort of dated for like a week when Kurt was trying to convince himself he was straight. When he firmly realized he was kidding no one, not even himself, they broke up. Since then, he and Brittany had remained close. They were both Cheerios and in the glee club, it made sense. 

He was happy to have Brittany in his life, even if that meant Santana by extension came with her. Santana was fine outside of the public eye. If the Unholy Trinity incited Kurt to their sleepovers, Santana was a different person. She put up a front at McKinley, extremely similar to the one Kurt attempted when he dated Brittany. 

Few are privy to why she did this, Quinn and Kurt knew and he was fairly certain Mercedes did as well. She was very perceptive that way. Brittany was Santana’s soulmate. It explained so much about their relationship. Always in sync, completing each other perfectly, a literal better half.

Honestly, it gave Kurt so much hope that everyone’s soulmate was like that. A missing puzzle piece. 

He really hoped his soulmate listened to more than just Teenage Dream because the lyrics were slowly creeping into his everyday language. 

Usually, Kurt found himself hyper-focused in glee club. He got an energy boost just from walking into the choir room. Like a light switch turning on. His focus wasn’t always on whatever lecture Mr. Schue was pursuing, sometimes he watched his fellow glee clubbers (catching himself up on drama just by sideways glances), or mentally mapping out his next performance. 

Today, Kurt wasn’t able to do any of those things. With the soundtrack of Teenage Dream (again) in his head, all he was thinking about was the center of a bulletin board with the cast list for The Rocky Horror Show on it. How far down the list was Riff Raff? How many names came before his?

Someone was snapping in front of his face. Kurt shook himself from his daydream to find Mercedes.

“Boy, wake up!” She said, “cast list is about to go up.” 

Either glee club had gotten shorter or Mr. Schue was putting it up early. 

…

Blaine didn’t really understand why the Warblers were concerned. Doing an improv performance was not new to them. In fact, Blaine had done three already this school year and he was only a freshman. 

The first one he did had been way back in September, he hadn’t even been an official Warbler yet. Warbler Tradition said: all potential freshman recruits were required to perform again after their auditions with the whole group. It was a solid way to see if they fit in well with the other established Warblers. Blaine fondly remembers vibing along with the older Warblers and fellow potentials to a medley of Pink songs. None of the freshmen had solos but it was still a fun time. 

At the time it seemed like all of Dalton fit into the choir room and surrounding hallways but in reality it was the entire freshman class. Improv performances weren’t something any middle schooler had seen before but the upperclassmen of Dalton knew the Warblers had plenty of improvs to come for the rest of the school year. The first one was special. Just for the newbies. 

Three days after that performance, Blaine had gotten word that he was to be a new Warbler and two months after that he was granted his first solo. Now, he was slowly becoming their go-to soloist for almost every performance for an audience. Blaine had become a vital part of all rehearsals for the most part. He was honored by their commitment to him honestly and he loved to sing however, a week and half of preparations was a tad excessive. Still, he walked his way to rehearsal positive that the council would have at least five points to discuss before they actually started singing. 

He walked into the choir room shaking his shake fondly and smiling at the Warblers already present. 

The council were always first to arrive. Together. Then it was a mixed bag of who followed. Usually Trent was there, punctual as always, and Blaine took the seat between Trent and Jeff. 

The room was mostly full already. 

Nick came in shortly after Blaine and sat across from him immediately asking if there had been a pop quiz in Stanton’s class earlier and was rather relieved to find out Jeremy was a filthy liar, who liked to start trouble. Before Jeremy could get on Blaine’s case about being overly sincere, the meeting began. 

Wes banged his gavel and welcomed everyone before gesturing for David to read off last meeting’s notes. Once the talking portion of the meeting was over, they pushed the furniture aside to make room. 

...

A week later Kurt was happy to have one musical under his belt but thankful the performance run had been short. If you thought the New Directions were dramatic during competition weeks, it was nothing compared to their musical rehearsals. 

Now, Mr. Schue was having the brilliant idea to host a boys vs girls competition. Of course, Kurt hadn’t wanted to work with the boys. They were sure to exclude his musical talents and he doubted he could get them to agree to any of his costume suggestions. 

This was hardly a challenge. It was bland and they had done it already. 

Kurt was sitting in the back of the choir room pouting. Yes, pouting. Full on arms crossed, head down, and bottom lip puffed out. Until, Mr. Schue had an actual brilliant idea, Kurt’s suggestion of course, to spice things up. 

The boys did not appreciate Kurt’s six hours of work putting two posters together. Even with the assignment to bring more feminine qualities into their performance, the boys ignored his input. So, when Puckerman suggested Kurt spy on the Warblers, he was thankful for a reason to leave. He packed up his projects and headed home to change.

When Mr. Schue found out who their competition was, Rachel and Kurt did some googling. He had seen the all-boys school uniform and was fairly sure he could replicate it with clothes he already had. 

He pulled some looks from his closet. Once satisfied he looked up directions to Westerville. 

Dalton was huge. It looked like a museum. How on earth was Kurt going to find their choir room? He hoped there were signs inside or a map. 

As he walked down a spiral staircase much too pretty to be in a school, he decided to just ask for directions. He was going to get lost if he kept walking without help. 

When the boy he stopped turned around, all Kurt could think was ‘I’d love to put my hands all over you.’ Which was a ridiculous thought to have because he didn’t know this boy and where had that even come from? Oh right, Teenage Dream was still playing in his head. Thanks, Katy. 

If only his soulmate knew he was using this song to fantasize about running off into the sunset with another boy. 

…

Blaine loved being in the spotlight. Wes would say it was because he didn’t get that kind of attention from his parents but that simply wasn’t true. Well, unless Cooper was around; he always pulled focus when it came to their parents. Older sibling privilege, he assumed. 

But he was running late. He stayed behind in class to ask a question which turned into his teacher rambling. Didn’t he know the Warblers had a performance today in the senior commons and Blaine was their lead singer? 

He was checking the time when someone stopped him on the stairs. 

A beautiful boy. Unlike anyone Blaine had ever seen before. He almost missed his name because he was caught up in memorizing his face. 

There was something said about being new, which Blaine doubted since he wasn’t in uniform, and Blaine mentioned a shortcut he knew of. 

It wasn’t really a shortcut. More like the long way to the Senior Commons but less crowded. Everyone was making their way to the Warblers and Blaine wanted as much time alone with Kurt as he could get. 

He wanted Kurt’s full attention. It was no wonder he instantly wanted to show off. Teenage Dream fit his vocals perfectly and Kurt was an excellent audience. In fact, Blaine was set on serenading him. 

He had no way of knowing that exact song had been playing all day long in Kurt Hummel’s mind. 

Afterward, Blaine lost himself in a group hug from the Warblers but Kurt’s beaming smile caught his eye. He pulled Wes and David aside, confirming his own suspicions that Kurt was spying on them first before convincing them to invite Kurt for coffee. 

The four boys sat at a table. Kurt seemed very nervous now. Blaine wasn’t sure if it was because he had been caught or something else was going on. In the end, Blaine thought it best for just him and Kurt to have a conversation. Not at all because he wanted alone time with him. 

This clearly wasn’t the time or place for romance. 

Once they were alone the whole tale seemed to flow out of Kurt: the name calling, locker shoving, his biggest bully. Blaine could relate. 

Sometimes he felt phantom pains in his right leg from Sadie Hawkins. At first, Kurt scoffed when Blaine began sympathizing. If he were Kurt, he might not believe himself. 

Private schoolboy bullied? Blaine sure didn’t look like someone who lacked friends. It was fairly common knowledge that Dalton had a zero tolerance policy for harassment. So, he explained. As brief as he could about his own experience with public school bullies. 

Kurt and he seemed to have more in common than a love for music. 

He doesn't have any plans to see Kurt again though Blaine has plenty of ideas on how they could get together. Coffee at the Lima Bean. Old musicals were playing at the revival theater. Maybe another high school was putting on a play this weekend. All Blaine needed was a good enough message to ask Kurt out. He drafted plenty but none sent. 

After school, Blaine knew Kurt might need an extra push. He was pretty sure classes at McKinley were done for the day. 

He sent a single word. Less second-guessing that way. 

Courage. 

Then, he walked to the library to start writing an essay on Lord of the Flies for English. 

However, he found himself unable to concentrate. Usually after a performance, Blaine had the song stuck in his head for at least a day or two afterward. In addition to humming in the weeks of rehearsals, of course. Instead, Blaine found himself thinking about Start Me Up by the Rolling Stones and oddly Livin’ On a Prayer. Both songs he thought better suited his father or Cooper’s tastes. It was a mashup of the two songs like his soulmate was hearing them simultaneously. 

When he started thinking about his soulmate, there was a clear picture of someone. It didn’t take long for Blaine to bring up those blue eyes and the soft complexion of Kurt Hummel. Which was crazy thinking. He had no idea if Kurt was his soulmate. 

Soulmates tended to be around the same age but just because Kurt was also in high school meant nothing. By that logic anyone at Dalton could be his soulmate too. 

During his brief time with Kurt this week, Blaine heard no music from his mouth. In fact, Blaine had done all the singing. Even with half his brain saying he was nuts to think Kurt was his forever, Blaine couldn’t let the thought go. 

…

Blaine’s text comes in in the midst of the girls’ performance. A wonderful mashup and excellent costumes. Tina had texted Kurt about the leather jacket idea early this week. He was very proud of how they managed to pull the looks together in such a short time. It was impressive. 

Altogether, Kurt was feeling great. The boys had their rehearsal, apparently their performance was turning into an apology. Kurt wasn’t sure what they had done to Coach Beiste but apparently, she was quitting. He and Blaine were texting periodically now. No one knew it but Kurt was surely developing a huge crush on the Warbler boy. 

Then, he confronted Karofsky. He didn’t want to feel the same regret Blaine did—no one messes with the Hummels. 

It seemed like mere hours but in reality, it was days, Kurt was enrolled at Dalton and saying goodbye to the New Directions. 

He was full on having a Vanessa leaving Troy moment here. Kurt Hummel has got to go his own way. 

God was he nervous to start at a new school. In the middle of the school year too. Being the new kid was going to be hard but not as difficult as staying at McKinley would be. 

When Kurt was greeted by Blaine’s smile outside the office on his first day, it made Kurt relax. At least he already had a friend here. 

It isn’t until they’re walking down the hall together—Blaine insisted on escorting Kurt to his first class—that Kurt noticed Blaine was humming.

“Is that High School Musical?” Kurt asked. 

“Oh, um, technically it’s the sequel.” 

“What about us…” Blaine sang, “what about everything we’ve been through?” 

“What about trust…you know I’ve never wanted to hurt you?” 

Blaine chucked. “Cheesy but true. Such a good movie.” 

“We should watch it sometime,” Kurt suggested. 

Instantly, he wanted to take it back. He’s been told he can come on too strong. Especially around cute boys. 

“I’d love too!” Blaine said. “I have it on DVD.” 

Kurt doesn’t see Blaine again until their one shared class of the day right before lunch. He sits across the room from Blaine during history but next to him at the Warbler’s lunch table. 

Most of the group has the same lunch so Kurt is introduced to them before his audition later this afternoon. 

“Nervous?” Wes asked, “you shouldn’t be.” 

“Yeah, from what Blaine's told us you're a great singer,” Trent added. 

“He’s barely heard me sing,” Kurt replied, poking Blaine’s arm. 

He only sang one line of a song to the other boy today. 

“Well…” Blaine rubs his neck abashedly. “I might’ve watched some New Directions videos on YouTube.” 

“Oh, I forgot Rachel uploaded those.” Kurt tunes to the other Warblers then, “I hope I don’t disappoint.” 

After lunch, Blaine walks Kurt to class again. “Between you and me, you’re a shoo-in.” 

“Really?” The Warblers were such an esteemed group. Not at all like the disorganized New Directions. They had also been a glee club for far longer. 

“Really.” 

***

Blaine has had High School Musical songs in his head all day. Whoever his soulmate is, at least he’s got good taste in Disney Channel original movies. Then as the Warblers were preparing for Kurt’s audition, the song switched. An Evita song. 

His soulmate sure did love musicals. Blaine was rather happy about that. He could already picture them sitting on the couch cuddled under a fluffy blanket with any number of classic musicals laid out before them. Arguing over if it was too soon to rewatch Moulin Rouge and whose turn it was to make popcorn. 

They’d be in a big city apartment. Somewhere where no one cared if they were gay. All anyone wanted to know was how they discovered they were soulmates. Their origin story. 

From that point, the daydream grew fuzzy. Blaine couldn’t come up with that meet-cute story. It hadn’t happened yet and nothing his brain could come up with would ever match up with his future reality. 

He shook his head, bringing himself back to the choir room. 

The room was buzzing with excitement. It wasn’t every day the Warblers auditioned someone mid-semester. Of course, Kurt had special circumstances but the group was notorious for never breaking tradition. 

Blaine tried to focus but it was difficult without Kurt at his side. Lately, he had been distracted whenever Kurt wasn’t around. All Blaine could hear, despite the loud room, was the song in his head. 

I had to let it happen

I had to change

Then, Kurt walked in and music started to play. For a split second, Blaine thought he was imagining the words from “Don’t Cry for Me Argentina” coming from Kurt’s lips. Surely he hadn’t chosen the same song as Blaine’s soulmate had in their head. He knew it couldn’t be his imagination when Trent leaned over and whispered to Blaine how much he loved this song. 

Like lightning striking a tree, Blaine had a realization. Kurt Hummel was his soulmate. 

Oh god, what was he going to do? 

His skin was burning as if it was burned away like bark. He drooped in his seat desperate for water to put himself out with. To put a stop to the tingling sensation bubbling up under his skin. 

All he wanted to do was reach out and touch Kurt. Some part of his brain was able to override that thought. He couldn’t ruin this audition for him. There was plenty of time to spend with Kurt after this, Blaine had all the time in the world to talk with his soulmate.

Soulmate.  

Never did he think he would find his soulmate this soon. Gosh, they were only teenagers. They had so much life to live together. This was rare, special, to find your soulmate so quickly in life. Blaine would cherish it, he’d be thankful for this gift for rest of his days. 

But how in the hell was he going to tell Kurt? It had to be romantic. Blaine always thought it would be when he finally came face to face with his soulmate, his one true love. There was so much work to be done and so little time to do it. Now that Blaine knew, he didn’t want to spend another day without Kurt knowing too. 

He used to dream about running dramatically in slow motion towards each other and embracing just as it started to rain, which of course led to a fabulous first kiss in the sudden storm. But Blaine knew how unlikely that would be. 

He’d just have to build a new fantasy, which he thought would be easy to do if Kurt was his so-called Prince Charming. Whatever happened was going to outweigh everything his imagination had come up with thus far. 

First and foremost, he’d had to sit through a discussion of this audition, which he was barely able to pay attention to. All he wanted to do was walk up to Kurt, cup his face, and kiss him. After Kurt was finished, the council dismissed him. Blaine knew he’d find Kurt just outside the choir room because they had plans afterward but now he had no idea how he was going to sit through coffee with Kurt and not tell him. 

“He’s very good,” Trent said, nudging Blaine. 

He nodded in agreement. It seems most of the group concurred, Kurt was a good fit for them. 

Kurt Hummel was the perfect fit for Blaine too. Even if he didn’t know it yet. 

***

Kurt didn’t consider himself to be a good reader of social cues especially when his own emotions were involved. See, Finn Hudson and Sam Evans. Crushes on straight boys never ended well. With Blaine, he swore things would be different. 

They were friends, classmates, and hopefully, soon they’d be fellow Warblers. Kurt was not going to mess this up. Even if Blaine was really cute and friendly and super kind and understanding. There was so much to love about Blaine, Kurt found it hard to find something he didn’t like. 

He had found focusing on his dislikes of a person kept his feelings at bay. Like how messy Finn could be really shut down any romance fantasy Kurt had drawn up. Except, Blaine didn’t dye his hair like Sam, he was completely organized (Kurt had seen his dorm room; spotless), he was modest and genuine. 

It made sense that everyone at Dalton wanted some of his attention. Blaine embodied Kurt’s idea of a gentleman and then some. 

After his audition, Kurt sat outside the choir room waiting for his results. The council would discuss with the full group, release them, and regroup tomorrow with a vote. Kurt was waiting for Blaine to be dismissed because Blaine had promised to buy him a cup of coffee. 

Some of the Warblers who were leaving had some pretty nice things to say about Kurt’s performance. Just general praise which soothes some of his initial nerves. Mostly, he just wanted Blaine to walk out with a big smile on his face. That boy couldn’t keep a secret. Kurt would know if he was in or not just by looking at his face. 

Kurt was joined on his bench by a boy who introduced himself as Duncan. 

“I was super nervous after my audition. I just got in at the beginning of this year so I know what you’re going through.” 

Kurt felt his shoulders drop in relief. As much as Blaine tried to assure him the audition would be perfect, Kurt felt like he couldn’t relate much as the star of the glee club. Back at McKinley, Kurt rarely had center stage. Here, Blaine always had everyone’s attention. 

“That’s actually great to hear,” Kurt said, with a slight chuckle. 

“Seriously, Kurt, I don’t think you have anything to worry about. I’m a little concerned they’ll kick me out just to have your voice,” Duncan teased. 

They keep talking about what it’s like to be a new Warbler since Duncan is positive Kurt will be getting good news shortly. He offers up some pointers to get on the council’s good side. 

“I loved your song choice by the way, so weird because Evita had been in my head all day.” 

It feels like someone’s dropped an ice cube down his back. He sits up quickly. 

Oh, Kurt thought, is this it? 

“You did?” He must’ve heard wrong. There’s just no way. 

“Yeah, I love that musical,” Duncan confirmed. 

Could it be this easy? He wondered. 

“We should hang out again soon,” Duncan told him, “I’d love to get to know you. Newbie Warblers gotta stick together.” 

Kurt gives Duncan his number before the other boy wanders off. Before Kurt can get too deep into any fantasies of his soulmate, wondering if that soulmate has just left him or not, Blaine comes out from the choir room. 

“Hey you,” Blaine greeted with a big smile. 

“Are you allowed to give me any inclination?” 

He shook his head but was still smiling wide which made Kurt feel like good news was in his near future like Duncan had said. Kurt was telling Blaine how long he had practiced the song over the weekend with Rachel and Duncan reassurances when Blaine blurted, “Duncan Samuels?” 

“Yeah, we just met.” 

Should he tell Blaine about them being soulmates or wait until he was sure? 

But Blaine just nodded. Something was clearly bothering his friend. For now, Kurt was going to let it go because he was sure Blaine would come to him if he wanted to talk. He didn’t want to force it out of Blaine. 

Kurt couldn’t even get Finn to talk to him during their warm milk chats at night. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to pull the information out of Blaine if he tried.

“Anyway,” Kurt said, continuing his previous line of thought, “Rachel has this whole stage setup in her dads’ basement.” 

“I don’t find that hard to believe based on everything you’ve told me about her.” 

After that comment, their coffee date is back on track, Kurt doesn’t bring up his potential soulmate meeting. 

***

Duncan Samuels was his lifelong nemesis. As far as Blaine was considered his life began when he figured out Kurt was his soulmate and if Duncan was going to interfere with that they were now enemies. Since their coffee date yesterday, Blaine hasn’t heard a word about Duncan but he also had yet to see Kurt today. They only had one class together after lunch, which Blaine was on his way to now. 

Kurt saved him a seat and delivered the news. 

“Duncan and I are going for coffee today.” 

Those words were devastating. 

In normal circumstances, Blaine would’ve asked Kurt why he wasn’t going to rehearsal but of course Kurt wasn’t a Warbler…yet. Blaine knew the Warblers were going to announce Kurt’s membership at the end of day, which meant this was the last rehearsal Kurt wouldn’t attend. 

So instead of a calmly said, normal statement, Blaine spent the next minute freaking out. 

Duncan was the worst! He was going to steal Kurt away from him before Blaine ever got the chance. Well okay, the rational side of him thought, Kurt isn’t being stolen he’s going willingly. 

“That’s nice,” he finally said. 

There was no way for Blaine to stop Kurt and honestly no reason to try since Duncan posed no threat to Kurt. He didn’t need a protector. Blaine knew they were soulmates and he’d find a way to tell Kurt later on. At the end of it all, Kurt was his soulmate. He just knew it. 

“Are you free when I get out of rehearsal?” 

“For you?” Kurt asked, “of course, I’ll probably still be in the cafe.” 

“I’ll come find you,” Blaine told him. 

Still, all throughout Warbler rehearsal, Blaine’s attention was elsewhere. He needed to get out of here and meet up with Kurt. Wes knew it too because he pulled him aside at one point while David ushered the guys into a new arrangement.

“What’s up with you?” He asked, “I need you focused for competition.” 

“I will be,” he vowed. 

“You didn’t answer my question.” 

Blaine looked back at the other boys but they were already harmonizing. 

“It’s Kurt.” 

Wes smiled. “Don’t worry about him. He’s in, I can’t believe we have a countertenor on our team now. We’re going to wipe the floor at regionals.” 

“Don’t get ahead of yourself, Wesley. McKinley already knows what a talent Kurt is, he won’t be a surprise to them,” Blaine reminded him. 

“Ah, but they didn’t utilize his talent,” Wes said, “it’ll shock them to see Kurt in the spotlight.” 

Wes patted Blaine’s back and guided him back to the group to finish up rehearsal. 

Blaine couldn’t help but check his phone again before he tuned back into rehearsal. He knew Kurt was getting coffee and that’s why he wasn’t answering his phone. 

One of the best things about Kurt was when you were with him everything else was put aside. Blaine was sure if things got really serious, Kurt would shut his phone off entirely to prove a point. Right now, it was annoying as hell. Blaine needed to see a reassuring text that Kurt wasn’t running off into the sunset with Duncan Samuels. 

What if his phone was turned off because the two of them were standing at the altar? Everyone turns their phones off in church. 

He really really needed to talk to him. Blaine didn’t want to be the type of soulmate that holds onto that information too long. It’s like he’s lying to himself not being with Kurt. 

Once rehearsal was finally over, Blaine rushed over to the on-campus cafe where he knew Kurt would be. He had to be there. 

When Blaine pushed his way through the door, he saw Kurt was sitting alone nursing what looked to be a cup of tea. When Blaine approached him he could tell it was Chamomile. 

“Can I sit?” 

Kurt nodded but didn’t say a word as Blaine hung his bag across the back of the chair and removed his blazer. 

He expected a question about the Warblers, perhaps an inquiry about his status to become one but nothing came. Kurt wasn’t even drinking his tea. 

“What’s wrong? Did Duncan say something to upset you?”

“I’m fine, Blaine,” Kurt said, “Duncan didn’t do anything wrong. It’s me as usual.” 

Blaine didn’t understand. 

“Am I that unlovable?” 

“What?” 

Kurt was the most kind, sincere person he knew and Blaine had only met him a few weeks ago. He was most certainly lovable considering Blaine fell for him in just under 3 weeks 

“I can’t really blame him,” Kurt continued, “it’s not his fault we aren’t soulmates.” 

“You thought he was your soulmate?” 

Maybe telling Kurt wouldn’t be too difficult after all. 

“It’s just he made this comment yesterday that made me think…but of course I got too ahead of myself again and really I should know by now,” Kurt mumbled the last bit, “nothing ever goes to plan.” 

“You can say that again.” 

This cafe wasn’t a romantic candlelit dinner. He didn’t have rose petals to scatter around. There was no champagne to toast. But he had the most important thing. 

Blaine reached across the table to grab Kurt’s hand. “Think of a song.” 

“Why?” 

“Just do it,” Blaine said. 

Kurt’s face was scrunched up in a “I’m confused but I’ll trust you” kind of way. 

As soon as the song hit him, Blaine opened his mouth to sing, “this could be the start of something new…it feels so right to be here with you.”

“How did you—?” 

Blaine smiled at him. “Pick another song.” 

“Your cares and troubles are gone. They'll be no more from now on.”

His mouth opens slightly. 

“Your turn,” Blaine said, “ I want you to sing what comes to mind.” 

Wasn’t the best way to prove they were soulmates to test each other? 

Blaine wanted Kurt to have his own moment of realization even if he engineered it. He didn’t want their “how-did-you-know” story to be him informing Kurt about their connection. Instead, he wanted to tell people about listening to Kurt’s Warbler audition and thinking how odd it was to know the song he was going to sing before it began. Kurt’s story would start with a laugh because he imagined someone other than Blaine as his soulmate the very same day. 

And wasn’t that just so silly of him? 

Rather than have Kurt just sing to him, Blaine harmonized with him. This was the proof. He’d sing everything Kurt could come up with and vice versa. 

“But baby, can't you see there's nothing else for me to do? I'm hopelessly devoted to you.”

“Blaine,” Kurt said. “We’re….”

He nodded. 

Before Blaine even realized it, Kurt was out of his seat leaning towards him, they’re kissing. Kurt’s fingers are curved around his chin and his other hand is tickling the curls at the back of his neck. The tiny wisps of hair that always escape the gel by the late afternoon. 

Blaine would happily keep his curls loose if it meant Kurt would keep his hands in his hair always. Especially, if it meant they’d never stop kissing. 

Eventually, Kurt has to pull away. They’re still close enough to feel each other’s breath. 

“Soulmates,” Blaine whispered. 

It had been quiet while they kissed like everything else in the world just stopped. All the sounds of Dalton came rushing back all at once. The students in the halls, coffee orders being called out, and the shuffling of chairs as people came and went. 

“When did you know?” Kurt asked, sitting down again. 

Blaine pulled his seat around so they were closer and Kurt immediately reached for his hand. 

***

3 months later. 

Blaine hadn’t been upset to lose to McKinley at Regionals. How could he have been when he got to sing with his soulmate in front of a crowd? Their duet was so in sync and the crowd could tell. He doesn’t think he ever received such a loud applause. 

Blaine had wanted to just be in that moment forever—staring into Kurt’s eyes hearing the words in his head just before they were said aloud, gripping his hand before pushing him into the spotlight to soak up the audience’s love. 

No, Blaine was happy about Regionals. The Warblers had worked hard on the set; their second place trophy sat on the right corner of the council’s table at meetings now. What Blaine was concerned about was Kurt’s leaving. 

His dorm room was empty now, the last suitcase zipped up. Blaine was sitting on his boyfriend’s mattress taking in the last moment that Kurt was a Dalton student. 

“I’ll miss you too, you know, a lot,” Kurt said from the doorway. 

“I know,” Blaine replied, “it’s just sad.” 

Kurt took a seat next to him on the bed. 

“I’ll sing to you.” 

Blaine smiled. “Promise?” 

“Everyday.” Kurt kissed his cheek. 

They were going to be okay. 

[perseusannabeth]

Don’t Look (Okay Maybe Just a Little Peek) - Part 3

A/N: So this is based off a prompt I received in my inbox, “dance with me” for Nessian. I decided to write it for day 1 of NaNoWriMo, so I haven’t really proof read this super well. 

Read on ao3

Read on tumblr, part 1, part 2

Word count: 1960

Nesta was in a good mood. She had the day off work, and she was home alone. She had just finished reading a book which had a really cute ending, and it had left her feeling happy and light. She also supposed that Cassian also had something to do with her good mood, as much as she was loathed to admit it to anyone, especially Cassian.  

Things had changed between Cassian and Nesta. It had been just over a week since that disastrous day he had walked in on her in the shower, but somehow miraculously, things had taken a turn for the better. Nesta still couldn't quite believe that Cassian was interested in her, that he had asked her on a date, but then she would catch the way he looked at her from the corner of her eye and realise that no, it was true. She still couldn't quite believe that he was looking like that. It seemed so out of the blue, except, he did flirt with her a lot. She had assumed he was joking but he had just been too scared to ask her on a date. He had said he used to practice in the mirror! 

She didn't want to admit it, but the thought of Cassian practising how to ask her on a date like some sort of love-struck teenager made her laugh. It also made her feel warm and fuzzy, something that Nesta Archeron was not well known for. It was really sweet and cute, which was not a way that she thought she would ever end up describing Cassian. But the more she got to know Cassian, she realised that she didn't really know him at all until she started living with him. She had known Cassian before, obviously, otherwise, she wouldn't have agreed to live with him. But before living with him she had never seen the way he was a morning person, and how he loved to cook, and how he likes soft things so his flat is full of fluffy blankets and soft pillows.  

Thinking about Cassian did give her a warm fuzzy feeling, and she wasn't quite sure what to do about it. It was strange. She had never felt anything like this, certainly not as strong as this. She had never thought she would feel this way, especially after Tomas. She had known, somewhere in the back of her mind that she had some sort of feelings for Cassian, but she had ignored them. Dealing with something like that is too dangerous after Tomas.  

Cassian always seemed to force her out of her comfort zone, and this was no different. She now couldn't ignore her feelings, which was something she was comfortable doing. However, despite the uncomfortable feeling, and the slight anxiety, seeing Cassian so happy about agreeing to go on a date with him seemed to calm the anxiety. The goofy smile on his face was all she needed to think of to calm herself when thinking about her possible feelings towards him.  

But right now, she was thinking about the goofy look on Cassian's dumb face, while listening to the High School Musical 2 soundtrack and cleaning the kitchen. She had a red velvet cake in the oven because after she had finished reading she felt like baking. She was in her pyjamas still, with no bra on because why would she put her boobs in their jail on her day off?  

Nesta couldn't quite help herself as she started singing along with Bet On It, which always pumped her up. Plus, the High School Musical 2 soundtrack was brilliant, and she very rarely got to enjoy it blasting from the speakers because she was always too worried that Cassian would find out and laugh at her. But right now, even the idea of Cassian laughing at her couldn't bring her down.  

She finished filling the dishwasher up as What Time Is It? Came on shuffle, and Nesta couldn't even stop herself from dancing along to it as she cleaned the surfaces. She eventually just gave up even pretending that she was going to carry on cleaning, and dropped the spray and cloth, allowing herself to dance properly.  

She was having so much fun dancing, that she didn't hear the front door open, and she didn't notice Cassian leaning in the doorway of the kitchen, just watching Nesta with a look of awe on his face. Nesta turned around, and let out a little scream, not expecting Cassian to be stood there. She clutched her chest as she tried to calm down her heart rate, and turned the music down.  

"I wasn't expecting you to be home at," she glanced at her phone to check the time, "3 pm. How long have you been stood there?" She asked, almost hesitantly, bracing herself for the rude comments about how she's a child or laughing at her, or the number of other ways Tomas might have reacted. She could feel herself tensing up, as though she was about to receive a blow. With Tomas, she probably would've received a blow. She knew, somewhere in the back of her mind, that Cassian would never do that, but her instincts sometimes took over her body before her mind could talk her out of it.  

Cassian looked at her in that way of his, where she knew he was assessing the situation, what she was doing and how she was acting. She had always hated it, but before, it had made her angry, today, the anger made way for a new feeling. Today, she felt seen, like he could tell what was going on in her brain. It was unnerving, and she felt naked. She hated the way Cassian could just look at her and read her emotions when she tried so hard to keep those walls up.  

"I've not been home that long, don't worry." Cassian paused for a second, and then gave her a soft smile, that Nesta hated because it made her feel all weird and fluttery in her stomach. "I'm glad you've been having fun today. You deserve it."  

Nesta felt her cheeks heat at that. Somehow, his sincere and heartfelt comments always made her blush much easier than his dirty ones did. Maybe it was because he always made the dirty comments and jokes and she had gotten used to it, or maybe it was because she wasn't used to Cassian being so honest with his feelings for her, but she could feel her face heating.  

"Thanks, I've just had a nice day I guess," Nesta said with a shrug, trying to regain her calm and collected demeanour, but she knew she was failing. Thankfully, Cassian didn't comment on it and just smiled at her.  

"What have you been baking?" Cassian asked, his eyes lighting up as he noticed the cake in the oven. He raised his nose into the air, sniffing like a dog trying to figure out what she had put in the oven. 

Nesta raised her eyebrows, trying to look unimpressed. "It's a red velvet cake because I was craving one."  

Cassian's eyes went wide with excitement, as he rubbed his stomach. "Gods, I love red velvet cake," he said, closing his eyes and licking his lips thinking about the cake.  

Nesta couldn't help but track the movement of his tongue on his luscious looking lips. Suddenly she couldn't think properly, she couldn't think of anything but Cassian's lips. Cassian, noticing the silence, opened his eyes, and grinned when he realised where Nesta's gaze had been fixed.  

Before Cassian could open his mouth to say anything stupid that would annoy or embarrass Nesta, she put her music back up. Her Spotify had now started playing You Are The Music In Me. Nesta decided to throw all caution to the wind, and ask, "Dance with me?" 

She looked up at Cassian, trying not to let it show on her face how nervous she now was. Cassian's face went slack, almost exactly like it had when he had seen her in the shower. Nesta started pulling her hand away, but Cassian grabbed onto it and used it to pull her closer. Another soft smile covered his face as he looked down at her as they started swaying.  

"I didn't know you were a High School Musical fan." 

"It's the greatest film of our generation. Also, which kid didn't have a crush on Zac Efron?" 

Cassian let out a booming laugh. "That's valid I suppose, although I was more of a Camp Rock fan myself. I mean, have you seen those Jonas brothers?" 

Nesta froze in his arms,  glaring up at him. "Camp rock was good, but I can't believe you're saying it's better than High School Musical. I'm not sure I can go on a date with someone who thinks like that. Or even live with them. I might have to move out."  

Nesta couldn't help but let out a small laugh as she felt Cassian's grip tighten as she tried to move away. She looked up at his dumb face to see that he was pouting.  

"I'm sorry I have terrible taste in terrible films, please don't leave me for it." 

Nesta was quiet, staring, at his lips again, so big and pouty. Cassian realised once again what her eyes were focused on, and went quiet, his eyes dilating as he took in Nesta, and how close she was to him. Cassian's chest was definitely moving faster than it usually was, and Nesta could tell it wasn't from their terrible attempt at dancing to High School Musical. It sent a thrill down Nesta's spine, the fact that she had this kind of effect on Cassian. She pressed her body against his, still swaying to the music, although Cassian seemed to be just following her lead. She wasn't entirely sure he even knew what he was doing, he seemed too lost looking at Nesta.  

Cassian's breath hitched as Nesta pressed herself against him. He broke his gaze from her lips to look down at their connected bodies, noticing the way her boobs pressed against his chest, her hips pressing dangerously close to his. She knew if she shifted a little, she might even feel the hard outline of his dick, pressing against his trousers, but didn't dare push things that far.  

She tilted her head up, not sure if she wanted to kiss him, but knew she wanted her face closer to him. Cassian was frozen now, his chest wasn't moving at all. She wasn't entirely sure if he was even breathing. 

Perhaps it was a good thing, but she couldn't help but curse internally as the timer went off to let her know the cake needed to come out of the oven. It startled her enough that she quickly pulled back from Cassian, flushing as she did. She tried to distract herself with the cake, but she could feel Cassian's eyes on her.  

"I'll leave you to it," Cassian rasped out. Nesta couldn't help but feel a little proud, knowing that was because of her.  

She turned around and smiled, trying to will the blush on her cheeks to calm down. "Do you want me to call you when the cake is done?" 

"Nah it's fine, I'll have my slice after dinner. I'll cook since you made dessert." He winked, and then quickly scuttled off to his room. 

Nesta bit the inside of her cheek, trying not to smile too much when she noticed the strange way that Cassian walked, and realised that perhaps she had a bigger effect on Cassian than she had ever realised. She decided that she quite enjoyed having that kind of an effect on Cassian. 

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@hizqueen4life @kelly-fasel @sannelovesreading @acourtofmarauders @maastrash @sjm-things @bookstantrash @cursebreaker29 @humanexile @iammissstark @stardelia @superspiritfestival @courtofjurdan @cass-nes @thewayshedreamed @queenestarcheron @sayosdreams @illyrianshadowhunter @blood-dreams

[nanowrimo]

6 Tips for Writing Your Opening Scene

The first few pages are often the most intimidating to write, but they don’t have to be! Young Writer Claire S. is joining us today to share six key tips on how to write opening scenes:

Sometimes I spin a story idea in my head for a day or two, imagining the characters and creating the story’s fantastical world. When I finally sit down at my computer with a blank document, I’m totally excited to write the story that I had been creating in my mind! Then I write out a couple of paragraphs and realize it’s not what I thought or imagined it to be. 

It’ll take me a couple of days, weeks, or even months to dig out the feeling or idea I really wanted to transpose. But in those few days, weeks, months, I’ll be trying to find my inspiration. I’ll be playing around with ideas, listening to music, drawing, even, so I can build the story I so desperately wanted to write.

So a couple of tips for writing your first pages? No problem. Here are some tips that I try to keep in mind when I sit down to write the start of a story.

1. Draw in your audience.

Remember that your first sentence, the sentence to lure in the audience (not to mention yourself), is the Rube Goldberg to your whole novel or short story: it’ll set your story in motion. It’s got that “first sentence power.” And, remember, you are your novel’s first audience, so it should interest you. But also keep in mind that nothing is perfect! If it doesn’t sound exactly right, you’ll get a chance to revise it in later drafts.

2. Show your characters.

Think about how you want to introduce your main character(s). The scene, the dialogue, the entire mood can be introduced in the first couple of pages. You may even want to try and transform yourself into the character, (well, not really) by thinking in the way you’d want your character to think and respond to what’s happening at the beginning of the story.

3. Don’t worry about messing up. 

Forget about errors or mistakes, they are the antagonists of story writing. If you see an error, or that you spelled a word wrong, forget it (for now). Leave it for editing later. Why? Because you’ll feel like re-reading what you wrote, and you’ll start to criticize your work, and you might overthink about what you’ve written. It’s happened to me tons of times.

4. Use music as inspiration. 

Music is an incredible ally. What I mean by that is that there are so many different songs that invoke feelings in you that can make you feel super inspired and ready for the novel creation path. You can even create a “Novel Soundtrack” for songs that help you get into the writing mood.

5. Take breaks when you need to.

If you need a break, take it. I get writer’s block all the time, and sometimes I get frustrated because I just want to write but I can’t. Instead, I’ll just think “Okay, no reason to get mad at my book, I’ll just play a game or go on a walk, and come back to this later.”

6. Get to know and love your story.

Your story can be your best friend. You already started writing a story, and now you have a relationship with the story. It’s up to you to give up on it, or keep going, and make a masterpiece out of something you worked hard on, cherished, cried over, even hated sometimes, because that’s how friendships go too. There’s no strong connection without hardship.

Finally: This isn’t a tip, but I just want to say: You’ve got this. Keep writing, and keep on soaring, because the world is your oyster. Whether you break out or keep hidden, either way, you’re a beautiful pearl.

Claire is a proud resident of California. Going into sophomore year of high school, she’s already thinking about college. She loves dogs, cats, and all animals, and loves to write, draw, and of course, read. Discovering the world of writing was like discovering a piece of herself, and she swears “I will never stop!” Armed with a pencil and a notebook, she plans to take down the world, one idea at a time.

Top photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash

[longinglook]

I may or may not have spent my entire Sunday binge watching all of I told sunset about you and Gaya sa pelikula and now I have so many thoughts and feelings that I need to write about them so here we go! Under a read more (if tumblr allows me to) because it’s 2k words hehe

First of all, I knew next to nothing about both shows before starting them. I had seen a couple of gifs here and there, but really had no idea what I was in for.

I started with I told sunset about you, which has 3 episodes out of 5 out. All I knew is that it was going to be beautiful and possibly sad, and it was. Everything about this show is so high quality, from the audio to the dialogue to the locations to the acting, just wow. The production is better than a lot of movies I’ve seen, and every technical aspect is perfect. I am really loving the plot so far as well, I find the childhood friendship to stubborn rivalry to grown up friendship again very relatable. I think it’s a very common experience for a lot of non straight folks to develop an extremely close bond with a same sex friend when you’re too young to realize what you’re actually feeling for them until you’re a lot older and suddely the jealousy and possessivenes all make sense.

I love the recurring themes sprinkled throughout the episodes, starting from the chinese vocabulary that expresses the core thoughts of the two main characters: rival, intimacy, secret, male protagonist, as promised. They could easily be the episode titles, or the names of imaginary sections the show could be divided into. It’s a great way to integrate metaphors and deeper meaning into the plot.

That’s how most of the communication goes in this show, deep emotions are never conveyed through words because words are scary and loud and they can’t be taken back once they’re out there. The plot advances though stares and gestures and touch and gorgeous shots of the landscape. The pace is slow with hour-long episodes that could each be a movie of their own. This worried me a bit before starting, and I have to admit that at times I struggled to stay focused, especially during scenes that set the mood but don’t do much plot-wise. This is just a personal preference, though, and in no way I see it as a flaw. 

The dancing around each other the main characters do, sometimes literal, is frustrating but it determines an emotional build up that’s just starting to reach its peak. This is one of those shows that has me screaming if only they talked to each other, but the silences and unspoken words are so well directed and acted that it works. I struggle a lot with keeping in mind that they’re still in high school, they’re very young and I can’t expect them to act rationally just yet. 

I was really worried about Teh possibly going the insufferable Theory-of-love-khai way, and I am still not 100% sold on him. When he started helping Oh-aew again it felt like he was just doing it to make himself feel better about the whole thing. It was frustrating to see him so possessive and jealous while also so deeply in denial about his own feelings, to the point where he had me rooting for Bas instead. He was getting better, but then he fled at the end of episode 3 and now I have no clue what’s going to happen next. About this, I really have no idea if they’re going for a happy ending or a sad one. I’m really hoping it will be good, because so far there has been barely any emotional payoff for all the repressed longing and misunderstanding the show has put us through.

I do like their dynamic a lot though, I have a weak spot for childhood friends reconnecting and an ever weaker spot for informal mentor/mentee relationships. Oh-aew asking Teh to tutor him until he passes the admission exam was an almost exact mirror of Yuri on ice Yuri begging Victor to be his coach until he retires and I loved that a lot.

Now on to the one issue I have with this show: it feels too much like an art film. It reminds me of Moonlight and Call me by your name, in the way that I wasn’t able to connect with those movies because they are too perfect. They are so beautiful and carefully crafted that I can’t fully immerse myself in them. There’s a filter that stops me from relating to the characters and constantly reminds me that this is not reality. It’s pretty, it’s extremely well done, but it feels like art. It has some quirks, some scenes that feel too artificial. One scene in particular, the one where Teh buries his head in the paper Oh-aew wrote with his coconut scented pen to sniff it, which is a direct parallel to Call me by your name, bothered me in particular. Just as it felt over-the-top and purposefully weird in the movie, so it feels in the show. It’s a way of showcasing how a confused teen deals with attraction he barely understands, it’s raw and animalistic in a way, but it’s so quirky that all it accomplishes is to remind me that I’m watching an lgbt show. It makes me wonder if a scene like this would make sense in a straight relationship because here it seems to highlight how different and primal his attraction is. If I had to pinpoint it, I’d say that I have a problem with media showcasing queerness though peculiar, purposefully awkward scenes like these instead of normal kissing and cuddling.

Overall, I can’t wait to see how this show ends and I still think it’s one of the best bls to air in 2020, if not ever. It’s refreshing to see something with a big budget used well! So far my rating is 8/10, which I know is a lot lower than what everyone else seems to think but it’s still very much subject to change! Just hoping they won’t pull a Make our days count, but I doubt they’ll go there.

And now Gaya sa pelikula. Wow. Again, I knew next to nothing about this show before watching, and I was coming from a 3 hour I told sunset about you binge watch, so the bar was pretty high.

And boy, did this show deliver. I was blown away by the depth and the humor of it. It feels like the writers had fun taking all sorts of common tropes and stereotypes just to show everyone how well they can be evolved and made complex. Two strangers who somehow find themselves sharing an apartment sounds like the start of so many fanfictions out there, but it’s so well executed and interesting that you don’t even stop to think about how weak the premises for their meeting are. It doesn’t matter and it’s not even that far-fetched, either. The sister and the neighbor are also two characters that start off as extra stereotyped, but in just a few scenes they unveil an incredible depth and backstory. It blew me away.

Each character is so realistic. Everything they do and say makes sense, they all have their reasons and their past and they react accordingly, it’s so coherent. It’s impressive how everything takes place inside the house and you barely realize it because things happen and the plot moves anyways, and the way information about external events and people is conveyed is so seamless that you don’t even notice it. In only 7 episodes (so far) they have managed to give everyone a complex background and personality through the use of objects and small details and wow don’t get me started on the music.

The soundtrack is SO GOOD. I never really pay attention to music in shows but it plays a very important role here in my opinion and, well, it’s exactly the kind of music I like listening to and ahhh I just spent 4 hours playing the first kiss song on loop so I might be biased. Right from the start in episode 1, when Karl gives in to Vlad’s music and starts dancing to it, it’s established that it’s an important element to the mood of each scene. I love how the dancing I talked about for I told sunset about you comes back here, but while I saw it as a hesitant dancing around each other there, here it’s the opposite, it’s freeing and it’s about accepting yourself. And the end of episode 6 highlights this, with the beautiful quote “You are entitled to a love that lets you dance without fear and shame.” It made me cry a looooot.

I think the development of their relationship is masterfully done. It doesn’t happen too quickly nor too slowly. Karl goes through some needed shocks that act as his wake up call. When I’m watching bl shows I care the most about them feeling real and relatable. I don’t want to feel like they were written by a straight person trying to guess what it’s like to be gay. Now I didn’t look anything up about the Gaya sa pelikula writers, but I’d be very surprised if they were straight. I can relate to both Karl and Vlad for different aspects of their stories and their worries and thoughts. There was one part in particular that hit so close that I had to take a few breaks because it hurt too much. I am a lesbian, I’ve had relationship with a girl that lasted over a year, I am out to some friends but not all. I never came out to my parents, who are both very open minded and friends with a lot of gay people and would love me just as much if I told them, and yet I can’t. It’s not just that, I am terrified by the idea of them already knowing or being able to guess. When Karl freaked out over his uncle guessing, it hit me so hard because I’ve felt the same way so many times.

Episode 7 was amazing. I hate badly written drama the most, and 99% of shows can’t come up with any good reason for drama but they have to put it in there anyways and it sucks. This was the complete opposite, I adored it and I say this as a lover of fluff. It feels right, I think it’s an issue that would come up between two people like them. They are both right and the only thing that could happen there is what actually went down. I definitely think things will be fixed by the end and I am looking forward to it, but I am very glad this issue was included because it’s so important and so true to many lgbt people’s lives.

Another aspect I absolutely adored are the multiple references to lgbt theory and language, and Vlad has some of the best lines I’ve ever heard coming from a bl. When he tells Karl not to be afraid of the word, when he explains that “you don’t look gay” isn’t a compliment, when he scolds his sister for not acknowledging the things she used to say to him by covering them up with her ally act, those are all such important and educative moments that I hope everyone listens to. I love that Vlad is not correcting some ignorant bad guy, but it’s his accepting and loving friends and family that make the mistakes, because sometimes being supportive your own way isn’t enough if you’re not actively learning from the ones you want to support.

This is a 10/10 for me right now. I can’t find anything I don’t like about it. It never feels boring, it never feels overdone, it never feels cheap or unoriginal. It went straight to the top of my favorite bls.

And now I can’t help but compare the two a bit, because yes they are two different shows but right now the relationships they portray have reached the same point: there has been a climax and now the one who is more confused about his sexuality is panicking and taking a step back. It’s a coincidence that I watched both shows on the same day when their last aired episodes end in such a similar way, but it really leads me to compare the two. I don’t want to put them one against each other or say which one did it better because that’s not the point of this, they are both two amazing and important shows who are excelling in what they’re doing. 

Gaya sa pelikula is down to earth, it’s explicit and it’s straight to the point in explaining what’s going on inside each character’s head. It feels like watching real people deal with real struggles. I told sunset about you is a lot more subtle and quiet, and since we don’t really have a clear insight in the characters’ heads sometimes it’s hard to completely understand what’s going on with them. It’s a completely different way of narrating, and while Gaya sa pelikula makes me feel like I’m a part of the events, I told sunset about you feels like I’m just spectating from an outside perspective. They are different choices, but one of them ends up feeling a lot more emotional to me than the other.

To wrap it up, I highly recommend both shows and I can’t wait to see how they’ll end! They are both among the best shows of the year, both free of all those annoyingly stereotyped characters and plot points that most bls tend to overuse.