#i often wake up on my couch and drag myself to actual bed well after midnight

[kylermalloy]

I just realized you use a queue. I was really worried about your circadian rhythm for a while lmao

Yes I have a completely normal sleep schedule nothing to worry about at all nothing to sleep—I mean to see here

[forestshadow-wolf]

Soap headcanon because I'm still projecting :) and to distract myself from the fact that my parents are fighting

Soap will sometimes get random bouts of insomnia. And they can sometimes last a little as a few days or as long as a few months. He doesn't know why, it just happens.

It makes him stay up until an hour or two before he has to get up, and then when he wakes up he's left really really tired. He ends up setting his alarms for an hour and a half before he actually has to get up to account for it. Because thats how long it takes for him to be able to drag himself out of bed. He keeps falling asleep after his alarms go off, this happens for an hour and the the last 30 minutes he just lays in bed hating himself for not being able to sleep for so long the night before.

It's not because of nightmares, he's been dealing with those for forever, knows how to handle them.

It's just that he'll go to bed at his normal time, and his eyes will just not close. He could he tired enough to fall asleep on his feet, and as soon as he lays down he's suddenly not tired anymore.

Sometimes he lays in bed doing nothing, sometimes he goes on his phone, sometimes he draws, sometimes he doesn't even bother with getting into bed. Just wonders the halls. There are some nights where he find ghost walking about as well. When he does find ghost out he doesn't always go wonder with him, sometimes he's not up for it, or he can tell ghost isn't.

He's found that during thses fits of sleeplessness he can sleep just about anywhere except for his bed. When he really desperately needs sleep he'll go sleep on the couch in the common area. But there's only so many times one can do that before people start to get suspicious.

There are some nights where his muscles and bones feel like jelly and he can't bring himself to get off the floor where he sat down. There are others where he's too hyped up on energy.

He's lost count of the number foof times he's deep cleaned the kitchen while everyone was sleeping. Or the nights where he wakes up on his floor with a crick in his neck. He's lost count of the number of times he's accidentally gone days without sleep just because his body won't let him.

I bet ghost gets suspicious about this sometimes but never has any substantial evidence to bring it up. And he knows that if he does bring it up without evidence soap will just brush it off, or redirect it towards ghost.

Ghost worries but it doesn't happen consistently so he can't actually bring it up. And soap it good a hiding his sluggishness, good a forcing his energy outward, good at putting up the smiling mask. The only reason ghost knows about it is because he's caught soap out enough times while out and about due to his own insomnia.

He watches the bags under his eyes deepen, and his hair becoms slightly unkempt. that's one of the most worrying things. For as long as he's know him, soap has always taken amazing care of himself and his hair. And then there will sometimes be months on end where the bags under his eyes look like they could reach the deepest depths of hell, and his hair gets just slightly too long and wild. Or sometimes it keeps getting cut shorter, as days pass, perhaps on restless nights when there is nothing else to do.

But again soap still acts completely normal so he can't bring it up. So he doesn't, just watches, keeps an eye on him.

Sometimes on nights where both soap and ghost are up and wandering the halls but don't interact, soap will draw. And when ghost goes back to bed soap will stay out. Continue drawing. On those nights ghost often wakes to a haphazard pile of drawings slipped under his door. He doesn't know when it started happening but he appreciates it.

[iguessweallcrazyithinktho]

┌─── ･ ｡ﾟ★: *.☪ .* :☆ﾟ. ───┐

A flight away

└─── ･ ｡ﾟ★: *.☪ .* :☆ﾟ. ───┘

—summary: You have been gaming with corpse for a few months now and the both of you have grown close to each other. Corpse started to feel comfortable around you and ultimately asked you to come see him in California. You live on the other side of the country and Even though the trip was long, it was so worth it.

—Genre: fluff

—warning: nothing, just wholesome content, reader is short in this

—word count: 1.5k

—Please don't post any of my content anywhere else without my permission

—Comment and reblogs welcome!

You and corpse have been friends for a couple of months now. You met through rae who was desprate to put you in her friends group. Instantly you clicked with corpse; he was kind and welcoming to you making you feel like you've been in the group since the beginning.

After your first game, corpse asked you to join some of his games, vice versa. You both played together, laughed together, joked together, even playfully trashed talked each other. You loved being around him and you couldn't deny the feelings you were feeling for him.

Secretly corpse felt the same way about you. With the time you spent together, he developed feelings for you, at first he thought he was just dreaming, but no, he started to notice it wasn't, it was an actual feeling.

One night corpse got an idea to ask you to come visit him. He know you lived all the way on the other side of the country, and he know you both called and facetimed often but he was dying to see you in real life.

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━��

When corpse finished his stream, he leaned back in his chair as he picked up his phone. He opened your contact. He hesitated at first, not sure he wanted to text you, but then he decided to put his nervousness aside and do something he was scared to do for a change.

Hey, I wanted to ask you something

You, who was on the other side of the country in your home laying in bed, picked up your phone to see a text from corpse. You smiled to yourself as you saw your favorite contact.

Ok, what is it corpsie?

When corpse received your text, he chuckled softly at the nickname you had gave him.

I just wanted to ask you if we could meet? You don't have to say yes, but I'm dying to see you irl you know

You gasped quietly. He was asking to meet you, YOU! You never expected him to ask.

You took a few minutes to silently cheer before you answer his text.

Holy shit yes! I'll book Myself a flight right now. I'll text you when I'm on a plane.

Corpse chuckled. He was so fucking happy you were coming to see him.

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

Hours went by and corpse was waiting for your text. He couldn't sleep of course which made the wait even harder. Around 2 am he got a text from you.

My flight is in an hour. I'll be seeing you soon! Get some sleep corpsie, I'll be there when you wake up.

It was real, you both were going to meet soon. He was was nervous and excited at the same time. He took your request and Went to sleep after a few minutes of trying.

5 hours later corpse woke up to a phone call. He groaned and picked up his phone, not bothering to look who it was. "hello?" His voice was extremely deep as he spoke. "Hi, corpse. I'm here."

When corpse noticed it was you he instantly got up from his bed. "Your here, here?

Your laugh on the other side of the phone filled corpse ears. "Yes, I'm here, here. Now come open the door, I need to see you."

Corpse laughed as he reached his front door. You heard it click before it swung open. You stood in front of corpse with a huge smile on your face. Corpse had on a hoodie that covered his head full of curls. He was tall, way taller than you making you feel like a little ant.

"oh my gosh, it's you!" You said followed by a giggle. "It's me." Corpse smiled at you. "Well come in." Corpse move, letting you in. You walked into the warm house and placed your bag on the floor. "I'm so happy I'm here."

You turned to corpse with a smile. "Thank you for proposing the idea. Now can I hug you?" You tilted your head the the side hoping he would say yes. To your surprise he did. Corpse pulled you into a hug. You were engulfed by his warmth and scent. It was very relaxing to you. After a few seconds you both pulled away.

Corpse invited you into the living room, you both took a seat on the couch and caught up. You told him about the flight and how it flew by fast. Corpse listened to you with a smirk. You definitely saw it and it made your stomach flip.

"so what have you been up to here corpsie?" You scooted closer to him and listened as he began to talk. "Well streaming, making music, suffering, you know the usual." Corpse trailed off with a soft, inaudible chuckled.

"yeah I know." You both sat in a comfortable silence once you finished your comment. You managed to scoot closer to corpse and rest your head on his shoulder. You couldn't see it, but there was a smile on his face.

Corpse turned and looked at you. You turned and looked up into his eyes, a smile rested on your face, but soon it fell when corpse kissed you.

At first you were caught off guard, but soon you warmed up to his lips and kissed him back. Corpse hand came to your side and held you as your hand came to his cheek pulling him close.

The kiss was pretty heated, you could feel the fireworks interrupt between you two. A minute of kissing ended when you both had to pull away for air.

"wow, I wasn't expecting that." You mumbled breathlessly. "Sorry, I don't know what came over me." "No it's okay." You quickly said. "I actually wanted to do that for a while."

Corpse pressed his lips into a thin line before sucking in his breath. "Yeah me too. I probably should've told you I like you before dragging you out here."

You sighed. "Well I should've told you how I liked you before you dragged me out here."

Corpse laughed. "Well I'm Happy you're here. I can't wait to spend time with you." You smiled softly at corpse. "I can't wait to spend time with you as well." You placed a kiss on his cheek before you rested your head back on his shoulder.

You weren't sure how long you were going to spend in San Diego, but you're happy you flew across the country to visit corpse, and confessed your feelings for him. It was worth it.

--

This is so bad, sorry

[golbrocklovely]

remember me // colby brock (pt 2)

A/N: as i mentioned before in a different post, this took me FOREVER to write. i loved writing this story but something about it just made me drag it out for so long. nonetheless, i love this and i'm excited to see what you all think. please lmk what you thought about this. thank you to everyone that has supported me and sent me kind messages. yall are the best ! hope you enjoy :) also lmk if you want another part...

prompt: she's the only one that remembers colby, or so they both thought.

trigger warning: ANGST, heartbreak, AU mention, friendship problems, cursing, happy-ish ending (but not the end...?), kissing

word count: 5526

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Colby was relieved that the waitress, the only one that remembered him, decided to help. The moment she agreed, Colby gave her his number and left. She texted him not too long after, and he realized for a moment she never said her name. He planned to ask her the next day when they decided to meet up at his place.

It was weird to come back to his apartment, knowing that down the hall his best friend, his brother, lived there and didn't know who he was. Usually when Colby felt lonely, he would walk down the hall to Sam's and hang out for a bit. It was always nice to talk to Sam about anything and everything.

But now... he couldn't do that.

Colby tried to sleep during the night, but barely any rest came from it. He tossed and turned, hoping that when he would wake up, this would all just be some weird-ass nightmare.

When his cell phone rang the next morning at 9:34 A.M., it was an unfamiliar ringtone. As he rubbed his eyes awake, he glanced at the caller, the name 'Waitress' appearing on his screen.

I guess this wasn’t a dream after all.

"Yeah?" Colby groaned, squinting his eyes at the sunlight.

Her voice came through cheery, the tone too loud in Colby’s ears. “Let me up to your apartment. I'm here.”

He cleared his throat. “This early?”

“I figured you would want your normal life back as soon as possible, yeah?” She sassed.

He rolled his eyes. “Alright, give me a second. I'll come down and get you.”

Colby stumbled out of bed, running his fingers through his hair as he threw on a random shirt and jeans, slowly trudging down to the lobby of his apartment. She sat on a couch, tapping her foot against the carpeted floors. Her eyes were staring out the door, almost like she was looking at someone. When she heard Colby’s footsteps, her gaze pulled away from outside.

“Did I wake you?” She frowned, grabbing her bag next to her and standing up.

He shook his head. “You can't really be woken up if you barely slept.”

“I'm sorry to hear that.” She lightly bit her lip, following Colby to the elevator.

He shrugged tiredly. “It's okay.”

They both slowly got into the elevator, climbing up to Colby's floor. The loud 'ding' of the elevator broke their silence moments later. They walked to Colby's apartment, and he unlocked his door quickly.

She whistled quietly. “Woah, nice place.”

A half smile spread across Colby’s face. “Thanks.”

“No offense, but how do you pay for this place if you're not a social media person?” She questioned, stepping into the kitchen.

He raised an eyebrow. “That's... a good question. From what my mom told me over the phone yesterday, I worked all throughout high school and college, so maybe it's from that?”

“You only worked at Dairy Queen while you were in high school. You must have gotten a better job in college because there is no way you can afford this place.” She disagreed.

Colby smirked. “How'd you know I worked at Dairy Queen?”

“Well, for starters, my friend told me. And also, I did some research about you. But I'll get to that in a second.” She continued, her voice falling to a serious tone, “So... would you like to hear my theories?”

“Theories?” He puzzled.

“As to why everyone forgot about you.” The waitress explained.

Colby sat down on his barstool, exhaling. “Let's hear it.”

“Okay. For argument sakes, you're gonna have to just go with me on this. Because otherwise, I literally have no way to help you.” She started, already pacing slightly.

He cautioned. “...okay?”

“So last night, I tried to think of a reason why everyone would collectively forget about you. And the only conclusion I could come up with is that you're in an alternative universe.” She hypothesized.

Colby’s eyes widened, bugging out of his head. “A what?”

“An alternative universe. Basically, everything is pretty much the same in your life, except a few minor details,” she revealed. “That’s why you still live in this apartment, but you didn’t get here the same way you did in your other life, your real life.”

“This... it's way too early for this.” He grumbled, astonished.

She sighed, her hands resting on her hips. “The only other option is that this is a very long-winded prank that your friends are still pulling on you. Have you tried talking to any of your other friends besides Sam?”

“No, everyone else’s number is gone in my phone, which I can only assume means they don’t know me either.” Colby retorted. Then he took a deep breath as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “But, this doesn't make sense. How did I end up here if this isn't my life?”

“I’m not sure how you got here, but I think you’re here for a specific reason. I think you’re here to right a wrong that this Colby Brock did. I’m just… not entirely sure what that wrong might be.” She answered, unsure.

He huffed. “Okay… what am I supposed to do then? Stay here and hope we figure that out soon? I don't even know who I am in this universe.”

“And that's where my research comes into play.” She pulled a laptop from her bag quickly, placing it down on the counter and opening it. She scrolled through her browsers until she came across Colby's Facebook, which surprisingly looked active for someone who hadn't been personally on it in years.

I use Facebook? Gross.

“First, I started by seeing if you and Sam were friends on here, but that didn’t amount to much since Sam doesn’t have a Facebook. However, what I found out is that you and Sam did live in the same town, go to the same high school, and played in the same marching band. Sam talked about his early years before he was ‘famous’ in one of the first videos he posted, and I crossed referenced that with your profile and it all matches up.” She informed.

“That's strange,” he mumbled. “What did we do after high school?”

She stated. “You went off to college and majored in Business Management with a minor in Philosophy. You graduated early too.”

Me? Graduating early? I couldn’t even get through math without Sam’s help.

“What did Sam do?” He asked.

The waitress scrolled to another tab, opening it to show a search of Sam. “Well, a very quick Google search shows that he actually went to the same college as you but dropped out once his Vine career started to pick up. Then he went on to Musical.ly when Vine died. He moved out to LA in 2017 and started a YouTube channel after he met Katrina, and slowly met all of his- your, friends that way. He got a bump of followers once he started dating Kat because of her following.”

Colby’s mouth gaped at her words. “That can't be true. He would have never wanted that. I mean, I had to convince him that we should be on social media so that we could spread our message. Plus, he hates those channels that use their relationship for views.”

“Not this version of Sam. Or at least, it doesn't seem like it.” She commented.

He covered his face, groaning into his hands. “What the hell am I here for? What wrong have I done in this universe?”

Her voice low, she replied. “I think it might have to do with Sam.”

“But... he doesn't know me.” He dissented, sitting up.

She nodded. “I thought so too. However, after scrolling through all of your public photos, I found this.”

Colby squinted at the screen, an old photo of him and Sam stared back. They looked super young, probably sophomores in high school. They were both smiling, laughing at something. He vaguely remembered this day.

“So, we did know each other.” He bit his lip softly.

She hummed. “Yeah. And weirdly, it’s the only photo of the two of you on your profile. But it’s not the only strange thing.”

Scrolling to a different tab, she pulled up an old tweet of Sam’s. It read ‘Never thought you would be the one to hurt me. But I guess everyone can be surprising.’

Colby noted the date. “That was back in high school.”

“Yeah, and there’s a bunch like them. He talks about being betrayed and someone hurting him deeply. He never mentions, of course. But his tweets line up with some that you were tweeting at the same time.” She confessed.

The waitress clicked on a different tab and another tweet showed up, one from Colby’s account. He gazed at it, reading the words ‘If you hate me… imagine how I feel about myself.’

Colby’s face dropped. “Wait, what?”

“You don’t tweet that often, but when you do, you talk about righting wrongs and fixing things you fucked up.” She added, “You also hate on yourself a lot.”

He doubted, crossing his arms. “You think they’re connected?”

“I do. I think in this universe you fucked up somehow and hurt Sam. And I think you are here now to fix what the other you did.” She explained.

He ranted. “This is all so fucked! When I saw him yesterday, he acted like he didn’t even know me. How am I supposed to even go about this? What, do I just go down the hall and apologize for something I don’t even remember doing?”

“No. Sam's not in his apartment anyway. I saw him leave while I was waiting for you.” She mentioned nonchalantly.

He grunted. “Great, he could be anywhere in LA right now.”

“I know exactly where he is.” She smirked.

“What? How?” He questioned.

The waitress divulged. “This version of Sam has a favorite restaurant he goes to all the time. A lot of his fans know about it, thus one look through any of his fan accounts and you'll see it. It's called ‘Paradise’.”

“Sounds like a strip club.” Colby deadpanned.

She pouted. “It's not. But he goes there all the time, and I got us a table there last minute.”

“What exactly are we gonna do when we get there?” He crossed his arms.

“I was planning on going up to his table and talking to him, maybe asking him about you, see how he reacts.” She described.

Colby furrowed his brow, confused. “And what about me?”

She slid her laptop into her bag, zipping it up hastily. “Well… I didn’t really think that far ahead. But hopefully, whatever you did is forgivable, and we can just fix it right there.”

He murmured. “That's a lot to hope for.”

“It's better than sitting here and wasting daylight.” She grabbed her stuff and headed for the door. Colby followed suit, grabbing his keys.

He spoke as he locked his door. “What if this doesn’t work?”

She turned back to him. “It will. It has to.”

~~~

Paradise was a themed restaurant, which Colby thought was strange because his Sam never really liked those types of restaurants. The theme was nice, however, tropical and Hawaiian. It felt like something he, Sam, and a few friends would have gone to after a fun, drunk night.

As Colby and the waitress were escorted to their table, they both kept an eye out for Sam, glancing around nervously for the blonde boy.

“I think the worst thing about this universe version of me is how messy my car is,” Colby joked. “It’s like I live out of it.”

She shrugged, smiling. “It wasn’t that bad.”

“You should see my real car. My honey wagon is spotless.” He expressed, waving his hand.

“Honey wagon?” She queried.

“Long story,” he chuckled. Then abruptly, he gasped. “Holy shit, I just realized I never got your name.”

She cocked her head. “What? I never told you?”

He blinked. “No.”

She started. “It's-”

“Hi, I'm Tony, I'll be your server for today. Can I get you something to drink to start you guys off?” Tony greeted, cutting her off.

“Yeah, sure. A water for me.” She blurted out.

Colby added. “Coke, please.”

Tony smiled. “Okay, coming right up.”

Once Tony left, the waitress started scoping out for Sam again, her eyes widening once she saw him.

Her body stiffened, turning back to Colby. “He's over there, three tables down to your left.”

Colby gazed over his shoulder at his friend. Sam looked lost in thought, staring at his phone as he ate his food.

“Why is he alone?” He muttered.

“From some of the blogs I read, he likes to go out and eat by himself. Also, apparently, him and Kat are on the rocks.” She admitted.

“They love each other so much, it's kinda gross to be around them sometimes,” He quipped, but shook his head. “So to hear that...”

“I'm gonna head over.” She announced quickly.

Before he could speak, she left the booth. Colby watched her walk over to Sam, listening closely to their conversation as he ducked his head down.

“Hey... sorry to bother you, but are you Sam Golbach?” She asked sweetly.

“Yeah I am. Did you want something?” Sam stared blankly at her.

“Um, yeah?” She almost scoffed at his tone. “I’m a huge fan and I know this might be a weird question, but do you know someone named Colby Brock?”

Sam’s face remained stoic, but his eyes intensified. “No, I've never heard of that name before.”

“Are you sure, because I'm pretty certain that you and him are best friends.” She insisted.

He raised an eyebrow. “What are you talking about?”

Colby watched nervously as she pulled out her phone and showed Sam the photo. Sam scrunched up his face, his eyes scanning the image. “Yeah, no. Still don’t know who he is. What was his name again?”

“Colby Brock.” She stated.

“...Sorry. I’ve never heard a name like that before.” He mumbled, almost inaudibly. “Sounds stupid anyway.”

She cocked her head. “Wait, what?”

Colby clenched his fist, unable to hear this conversation any longer. He needed to come face-to-face with Sam. He slid out of his seat, walking hastily over to Sam and the waitress. Sam’s eyes narrowed as he gaped at Colby.

“Sam…” Colby started.

Sam growled. “Are you fucking serious, Colby? Did you really have to get one of my fans involved?”

“What?” Colby puzzled.

Sam jumped out of his seat, grabbing Colby’s arm and pulling him out of the restaurant. The waitress followed behind them, confused just as much as Colby. Sam’s feet stopped behind the back door of the building, turning to Colby without warning.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Sam barked.

Colby stepped back, surprised by Sam’s anger. “...Uh, I don’t know what you mean by that.”

Sam scoffed. “Why the fuck are you here? After all this time?”

“So, you do remember me.” Colby remarked.

“Yeah, I do. When you showed up at my place yesterday, it took me a minute to realize it was you, since you decided to dress up like a Hot Topic employee, but yeah, I knew it was you. Are you really gonna pretend in front of her that we don’t know each other?” Sam teared his eyes away from Colby’s, staring at the waitress suddenly. “Let me guess, he hasn’t told you the whole story, right?”

“I guess not.” She shrugged uncomfortably.

Sam chuckled darkly. “Of course not. If he told the whole story, he would have to admit he was an asshole, and God knows he’s not gonna do that.”

“What are you talking about?” Colby panted.

“Do you not remember? Well, I’ll give you a refresher. You and I became friends freshman year of high school. You were my best friend and I was yours. I trusted you. I trusted you with a lot of shit that I’ve never told anyone. Senior year of high school, right before we were about to graduate, right as we were starting a social media career, suddenly you don’t want anything to do with me; which would have been bad enough, but then I go and find out you and my girlfriend were hooking up behind my back,” Sam snapped, catching his breath for a moment. “So yeah, I remember you, Colby.”

Colby’s mouth fell open, his breathing speeding up.

None of this sounds like me. I would never hurt Sam like that.

“And now, you have the fucking audacity to show up when everything in my life is going great and I’m succeeding. I have fans, friends, and a girlfriend that all love and care about me, and you’re here trying to what? Stir up drama? Get some clout from me?” He demanded.

“If your friends and girlfriend love you, why are you eating all alone?” The waitress jeered.

Sam glared at her, biting his tongue. “And you made one of my fans hate me. Dope, dude.”

“Sam, look; I’m sorry for what I did. But that was years ago. I’m not who I was back then.” Colby choked out.

“I don’t care. I don’t want you in my life. Do you not understand what you did to me?” Sam persisted.

“I know I was an asshole, and I apologize for ever hurting you like that. But I miss you, and I want to work things out. Let me prove to you that I’m better.” He trembled, getting closer to Sam.

Sam backed up, blocking Colby. “No. No! You don’t get to miss me. You don’t get to miss a relationship you fucked up. It took me years to trust again. Hell, I’m still going through it. You don’t get to decide whether or not you’re in my life. Not anymore.”

“Sam… please.” Colby whimpered.

“Don’t show up at my place again. Don’t talk to my fans about me. Don’t act like you care about me. Because I’m done,” Sam stared into Colby’s eyes before going back into the restaurant. “I don’t care about you. Fuck off forever and leave me alone.”

Sam’s words punched Colby hard, taking the breath out of him instantly. He caught himself against the wall, his legs turning to gelatin under his weight.

He stuttered. “I… gotta leave. I-I have to…”

“Colby, relax. It’s gonna be okay.” She grabbed his hand.

He shook off her embrace. “What? No it’s not! Did you not hear what he said? Why would he want to be friends with a piece of shit like me?!”

“You were eighteen when this all happened. Give yourself a break.” She argued.

“No. I’m fucking terrible. This version of me is terrible. Of course he doesn’t want to be friends with me! I don’t even want to be me.” His voice quivered with anger, his body racing away from her.

She furrowed her brows, trying to keep up with him. “Where are you going?”

“I just need to leave. I can’t be here right now!” He grunted, his pace picking up.

She called after him, but Colby didn’t care. His heart slammed against his chest over and over again. Tears weld up into his eyes, blurring his vision as he began to run. He wanted to keep running until his legs gave out, until he couldn’t remember all the words Sam had said to him.

It dawned to Colby how much worse this universe was.

He wasn’t just stuck in a universe where Sam didn’t know him.

He was stuck in a universe where Sam didn’t want to know him.

In a universe where Sam didn’t love him.

And he had no way of escaping.

Colby must have blacked out while he ran, somehow maintaining to stay upright, because once his thoughts started to subside, and his body basically gave out under him, he noticed he was in a part of LA he had never been before. Some random neighborhood that was unfamiliar.

He shoved his body up against a metal telephone pole, sliding down to the ground. He tried catching his breath, gulping back breaths as he forced down the nausea overwhelming his senses. He wiped his face with his sleeve, feeling more tears rush down his cheeks.

His throat and chest burned with each sharp inhale. He whimpered into his hands, covering his face from the slowly retreating sun.

He slid his phone out of his pocket once he caught his breath, calling the only number he knew.

“Hey honey. What’s up?” His mom’s voice rang back sweetly.

Colby’s voice was monotone, exhausted. “You know who Sam is, don’t you?”

The line went quiet for a moment, all Colby could hear was her light breath.

“You told me not to talk about him. After you two stopped being friends, you said you never wanted to hear his name again.” She exhaled deeply, “I was taken aback when you asked about him yesterday.”

“He’s out here… in LA.” He responded.

She gasped lightly. “Did you run into him?”

He laughed bitterly. “You could say that.”

“Oh, Colby. I’m so sorry.” His mother consoled.

“There’s nothing to be sorry about, mama. I just…” Colby trailed off, unable to explain.

“Why don’t you come home this weekend?” She offered. “I miss you, you know.”

“I would love to. But…” His chest heaved as hot tears drifted down his cheeks. “That’s not my home.”

“Nonsense. You will always have a home here.” She assured him, her voice almost trembling.

He wiped a fallen tear, a broken smile coming to his face. “That’s good to know. I love you.”

She hummed. “I love you too, baby. Call me again soon.”

“I will. Bye.” He uttered breathlessly.

The sky was getting darker and darker, and Colby remained against the phone pole. He didn’t know how much time had passed, but suddenly his phone vibrated, a new message from ‘Waitress’ asking where he was. He sent his location, and she arrived twenty minutes later in his car. He stood up, stumbling to his passenger door. His legs were weak from the sprinting he had just done. As he got in, the cool AC blasted the sweat and tears off his face.

They didn’t speak, a quiet radio station playing in the background the only sound. She drove through the hills of LA, eventually hitting a peak. She parked the car as it overlooked LA, the lights looking like stars on the horizon.

She got out a minute later, walking over to the hood and leaning against it. He could see something in her hand but didn’t recognize it. Colby sat in the car by himself, not able to physically move his body from how exhausted he felt. Eventually, he achingly stepped out of the car, sitting next to her on the hood.

“I’m fucked.” Colby breathed.

She started. “I don’t think-”

“Please don’t try to make me feel better. I know you mean well, but I am fucked,” he rebutted, his voice dark. “I’m stuck here, in this universe, where Sam hates me. And as if that weren’t bad enough, I did terrible things, things I know I would never do to him. How the fuck am I supposed to apologize for those mistakes? I wouldn’t take him back if the roles were reversed.”

“Read this.” The waitress stated, handing him a journal.

He glanced down at the leather-bound book, slightly faded from years of writing. He unclicked the lock and opened it, looking down at the pages. It was his, a journal full of writings he had done.

“Where did you get this?” He inquired.

“You were right about your car being messy. But you’d be surprised what you fine if you just look.” She teased.

Colby read over the words, the first entry catching his eye. It was dated a year after him and Sam had graduated high school.

Sam is succeeding without me. I knew he would. He was always so smart when it came to business decisions. He just hit 10k followers on Vine. That’s crazy!

“What the hell is this?” Colby questioned.

She answered quickly. “This whole journal was you keeping up with Sam without him knowing. This version of you always paid attention to what he was doing, even if you guys were no longer friends.”

“I’m obsessed with Sam? That’s great.” He deadpanned.

“You’re not obsessed with Sam. Read this entry.” She skipped a handful of pages, finally stopping on one and showing it to him.

I hate myself everyday for the hurt I caused Sam. I can’t believe what an idiot I was back when I was 18. We could have gone so far together… but I had to go and fuck it up.

He scowled. “Am I supposed to be sad for myself?”

“Keep reading.” She pushed.

The night I chose to never speak to Sam again, I knew I made the wrong decision. But I had to. Sam was ready to go on and do bigger and better things. I was just gonna hold him back. I was terrified of failing, not only myself, but him. He deserves success. That’s why I had to ignore him. I have never been as smart as him. I would have ruined our chances of doing something great. And I have been proven right by how far he has gone without me.

“You stopped being his friend because you were scared, not because you didn’t care anymore.” She repeated.

He slid off the car, scoffing. “So what if I was scared to fail? Sam didn’t deserve the hurt I caused just because of that. And what about me cheating with his girlfriend?”

She jumped off the car, striding up to Colby. She grabbed the journal from his hand. “You didn’t cheat, look.”

She pointed at the bottom of the page, his eyes following her finger.

“Me and Lexi were never together! I hate her for telling him that. One night, they had a really big fight and she came over to my house to ask what she should do. I told her to break up with him if she really didn’t care anymore. And then she tried to hit on me. I told her off and threatened to tell Sam, but she got to him first. She must have told him her and I were together.” The waitress read aloud.

“Wait, if I never hooked up with his girlfriend, why wouldn’t I tell him that?” Colby hissed.

“I think at that point, you wanted the friendship to be over, and I think this solidified it.” The waitress responded.

“All this time I could have been friends with Sam, but I ruined it because I was scared? What a fucking idiot.” He spat.

“You weren’t an idiot,” She interjected. “You just disliked yourself so much you didn’t think you deserved happiness. At least now you know that this version of you isn’t as terrible as you thought.”

“Even with that being the case, Sam’s never gonna accept my apology. Why should he?” Colby lamented, “I let him down the worst ways. I broke his trust and loyalty.”

She shook her head, stepping towards him. “Give him some time. You might be surprised."

Before Colby could speak, his phone rang. He took his phone out of his pocket and looked at the number. It looked familiar, but he couldn’t place it.

“Hello?” He answered.

“Did you really mean it when you said you were sorry?” Sam spoke, his tone hesitant, but dry.

His breath hitched at the sound of Sam’s voice. “Of course. I never meant to hurt you, Sam.”

Sam paused for a moment, before breathing out. “I’m giving you one more chance. Tomorrow. Come by my place. You apparently know where I live.”

“Yeah,” Colby laughed awkwardly. “I’ll come by. Thank you… Sam.”

“Don’t thank me yet. I’ll see you later.” Sam stated, hanging up.

Once the call ended, Colby’s eyes stared down at his phone widely. He almost couldn’t believe that happened.

He inhaled sharply. “Sam just called me. He wants to meet me tomorrow.”

“That’s great.” Her voice just above a whisper.

“He wants to hear me out… he wants to give me another chance.” His face dropped with confusion. “How did he get my number?”

It hit Colby like a brick as he gazed up at the waitress, who bit her lip hiding her smile. “You…?”

“You weren’t the first person I showed the journal to,” she explained. “When you ran off, I was gonna go after you. As I got in your car, I saw this journal sticking out from under your seat. I read through it and… I knew I had to show Sam. I went back in and talked to him for an hour, showing him how much you were actually sorry. How much you had beat yourself up over hurting him. And then I gave him your number. I wasn’t sure if he was gonna call but-”

“Oh my God, you’re amazing!” Colby ran up to her, grabbing her by the waist and spinning her around. She gripped his shoulders tightly as they spun, laughing loudly into his ear. As her feet touched the ground, he stared into her eyes, his smile the brightest she had ever seen it. His hands glided up her body to her face, cupping her cheeks quickly. He smashed his lips against hers, his heart pounding as he did. Her hands lowered to his chest, her grasp on his shirt tightened as she felt herself lose her footing and back up into the car.

As they stumbled, he realized what he was doing, pulling away quickly. “Shit… I’m sorry. I-I shouldn’t have-”

“No, it’s okay,” She giggled. “I’m just… surprised.”

He exhaled, letting his arms fall away from her body. “Me too.”

They leaned against the car, keeping a slight distance from each other. A light blush rested on both their faces; however, it was hard to see with the setting sun, something they were both grateful for.

The waitress sighed, breaking the moment of silence. “I think I know why this happened. Why I was the only one who remembered you…”

He raised an eyebrow, slightly side-eyeing her. “Really?”

“I lied to you when we first met. I wanted to seem a bit cooler than I am, but I don’t think I can hide that anymore.” She began, nervously.

Colby’s face relaxed a little, surprised at her words. “Okay.”

“My friend didn’t introduce me to you guys… I introduced her… to you.” She confessed.

A soft grin came to his face. “I had a feeling.”

She rolled her eyes. “No, you didn’t.”

“Yes, I did! I totally did,” he snickered. “Not every fan knows I worked at Dairy Queen. And… no average fan would have helped me get Sam back the way you did.”

“I think there’s a reason for all of this. I think in your universe, your life… you don’t know me.” Her voice dropped suddenly, making Colby turn to her.

“That’s true, I don’t.” He nodded.

Her eyes met his, a sad glint reflecting in the moonlight. “But I think the reason for that is because… you’re not supposed to.”

“What do you mean?” He replied, his face twisting in confusion.

“I think you and I are only supposed to have met here, in this universe. But not in yours.” She glared up at the sky, “Maybe in some weird way, I’m your guardian or guide or something.”

Colby’s thoughts raced. “So, what you’re saying is-“

“This might be the last time you’ll ever see me. You did what you had to do. You got Sam and you to talk again.” Her voice cracked as she held back tears, “You can go home.”

He grabbed her hands, holding them close to his body. “But… I don’t want to leave if it means I don’t know you.”

A hitched breath fell from her lips, a smile appearing from his words. “If we’re meant to be, we’ll see each other again.”

“That’s not fair.” He shook his head, a deep frown settling on his face.

“I know, but it’s how it has to be.” She whispered.

He rested his forehead against her, breathing deeply. “Can I… get one more kiss?”

She bit her lip softly. “I thought you’d never ask.”

They leaned in, his breath fanning across her lips for a split second before he pulled away.

“Wait…” He shuddered. “I never got your name.”

A soft smile came to her lips. “I’ll tell you after.”

His arms wrapped around her, pressing her body into his as their lips collided. He held onto her for dear life, terrified that the moment he pulled away, she would be gone.

He could feel things around him slow down, almost melting away, but he couldn’t tell if it was from the beauty of their kiss making him dizzy. A whirling silence overcame his senses. A burning sensation sliced through his abdomen; his breath ripped from his lungs.

A heavy darkness overtook his vision and for the briefest of moments, he felt absolutely nothing.

Except her lips.

<< |

[hanniiesuckle17]

Dating Seo Changbin

A/n: I am so sorry this took so long!!! i hope you like it <3 oof its been a while since I've done this style so here we go

Requested: @mrsunshine999

Tag List: @distrikt9 @mini-meanhoee @poeticallyspaghetti @hanstagrams @desertofdessert @hoes4hoseok @yangomangos @jeonqqin @geminirules @crscendoforsung @mrsunshine999 @jisungsjheekies @hannie-squirrel00 @cotccotc @multi-net​

Warnings: cussing, changbin being best boi, 

First of all....reader you are one lucky bitch.

Dating THE changbin

damn

Changbin is definitely one of the more domestic boys

He thriiiives with being a cuddly soft boyfriend

You probably met his parents on like your fourth date

But it was like a surprise thing 

He was like “Stop by my place because I’ve got to take care of somethings before we go out”

and you were like sure whatever so you get there like twenty minutes early and knock on the door

changbin opens and says you can wait in the living room while he is grabbing some things

first of all you notice his house is super fuckin nice

you’re like “mental note to ask who his decorated is” 

so he goes off and you walk in the living room and there are his parents just looking at you with kind expectant smiles

and you’re like “ummmm.........hello........changbin’s parents....”

changbin is like walking in and out of the room completely unaware that you are lowkey shitting your pants because omg his parents are right there and you were not prepared for this you were just promised food

its then you realize this is his parents house and he freaking tricked you into meeting them

by the time he sits down next to you on the couch you’ve practically sweated through your nice outfit and answered a billion questions

“I told you, I pick good ones mom- OW!” 

you pinched him really hard and made a nervous look towards the door. 

He laugh and got the message

the two of you said goodbye and you proceeded to whack him very hard the second the door closed behind you

loves to spoil you

anytime you're mad at him the next day you find a very expensive flower arrangement as well as a nice piece of jewelry on your desk or doorstep

he never lets you pay for anything

in fact the most common argument you have is about him spending too much money on you or not letting you pay

one time after a really big fight he secretly paid your rent for the month (which led to you yelling at him again)

“CHANGBIN YOU PAID FOR MY RENT?!”

“I thought I was doing a nice thing!”

“Yes it was very nice but I want to do things for myself!”

“But you’re so....baby....my baby....I wanna take care of you.”

“I AM NOT BABY!”

he thinks you look really cute when you’re mad so you never really end up getting anywhere with arguments like that

changbin is definitely a huge cuddler

likes being both little and big spoon

his favorite sleeping position is probably you sleeping on top of his chest so he can hug you like a teddy bear (you have replaced Munchlax haha)

probably takes you on the most aesthetic dates

he loves being your personal photographer

he can’t show you off on the skz insta so he probably has like a separate private account just to post really cute pictures of the you and him

changbin is a huge fan of couple clothes 

like any kind

his favorite is finding couple shoes like sneakers. 

he likes knowing that he could wear them onstage and bring a piece of you into the public view but its like his lil secret

changbin is like super no no about scandals so after a few months he probably announces the relationship before the press even think he is in one

changbin is like the pinterest boyfriend 

like he strives to be pinterest worthy

the boys give him so much shit about it but like lowkey he doesn’t care he just steals their coffee or something in revenge

he probably keeps like special products for you in his apartment

he always has the coffee or tea you like stocked in his kitchen

changbin is definitely the type to love hard and love fast so once this boy has you locked down in a relationship he just goes all in

you two probably move in together pretty quickly because this boy is just so anxious to be around you all the time

lowkey whiny once you move in 

“y/nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!”

“changbin you've said my name like 18 times what the hell do you want”

“i wanna hug.”

tries to use aegyo to get out of chores and housework

“I love dark my ass.” you say shoving a laundry basket in his arms and watching him pout 

late night gym dates at like two in the morning

the boys lowkey getting jealous of how much time he spends with you

Felix and Hyunjin basically live at your apartment

you don’t know how they got keys but somehow they are always there 

you’ll wake up one morning and felix will be randomly asleep on your couch for no reason

your dates are often crash by one of the boys but you honestly don’t mind because they are so much fun

changbin is actually the most caring and empathetic boyfriend

he always seems to know when you have a bad day or are just feeling bad about yourself

sometimes you don't even understand how he knows 

you’ll just be laying in bed on your phone after a really rough day and wanting to cry and changbin will just come up and give you the warmest gentlest bear hug 

he won’t say anything but he’ll just hold you until you want to talk or just cry it out

lets be honest changbin hugs would be the best tho

like he hugs with his whole being

in a relationship i feel like he is super affectionate so hugs are pretty common but he probably hugs differently for different circumstances

like he gives really gentle hugs when your sad and strokes your hair, kissing the top of your head

probably a big fan of quick side hugs when you're in public or with the boys

big cuddly hugs when you’re alone where he can rock you side to side or flop onto the couch with you

so ‘i love you’

again changbin falls fast and hard so he would for sure be the first one to fall in love

but he wants you to say it first because he knows sometimes he can move too quickly and he doesn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable

the first time you say it changbin is just so happy 

before you can even finish the sentence he’s already saying it back

“I love you-”

“I love you more.”

he never forgets an anniversary even if he is on tour

during one of their breaks he flew you out so you could celebrate together 

he loves traveling with you

even if its just a road trip or the two of you randomly decide to spend the weekend at a hotel that's thirty minutes from your house

changbin definitely knows what he wants in life so the second he decides you are the one for him he starts planning how he wants to spend his life with you

he loves having serious conversations with you about the future

changbin loves when the two of you invite all the boys over for dinner and it turns into a fancy dinner party and he cant help but picture you doing this five or six years from now and you have kids and are throwing dinner parties like this on the weekends

you too throw a HUGE Christmas party every year

like inviting lots of staff from the company and a bunch of family and friends 

so like one second you are talking to changbin’s sister and your mom then the next thing you know you are accidently bumping shoulders with fuckin BamBam from Got7 or Tzuyu from Twice and Jae is singing with Jisung in your living room

its like a huge fancy event that you and changbin throw at your place that you spend like a month planning for

everyone is dressed very nice and your house is spotless and flawlessly decorated with a brightly lit tree that you and changbin spent four hours decorating

by 9pm everyone is drunk on egg nog and opening presents from secret Santa 

changbin also never lets a Christmas go by without kissing you under the mistletoe 

the boys stay the night mostly because no one is sober enough to drag Jisung out of your house. 

So Christmas morning is always spent with the boys 

changbin always puts you first 

he is really considerate and always considers how his decisions will affect you (unless he’s trying to pay for something)

all in all changbin would just be the best boyfriend

congrat reader you landed an angel

Masterlist

[howtodisassembleyourdeviant]

Hanks lifeless body on his kitchen floor because you failed to save him

Send my muse an anonymous nightmare.

"Hey, Hank!" Connor calls out cheerily, having just returned from walking Sumo. He regularly snuck over to the Lieutenant's house after moving out, taking Sumo on walks or just checking on the man. He figured, once Hank returned from work, they could have a movie night. The old car was parked out front when the duo walked up. Though, it was a little concerning to see it parked crooked, Connor knows Hank has been working a lot lately. He really should take some time off.

Connor froze once he looked up from unclipping Sumo, the dog immediately running into the kitchen to the fallen man. There was a bottle of Black Lamb on the kitchen table, 3/4 empty. The photo they had moved to the mantle, set next to new photos of happy memories, had been pulled down, sitting where the man could see it on the kitchen table. What made his blood run cold was the light reflecting off the gun, smoke still swirling from the barrel.

"Hank!" Connor ran to his side, hoping, praying, it wasn't too late. Those hopes were dashed the second he was at the threshold. The sickly scent of iron hung in the air, and he knew if he were human, he would have lost the contents of his stomach, "H-Hank?" Connor called to him weakly, voice cracking. He didn't need to scan him to know he's gone.

Sumo wasn't so easily convinced, licking at his master's cheek, whimpering when Hank didn't move to pet him, push him away and say how disgusting he is, drooling all over him. Tell him he's a good dog for waking him from another of his drunken stupors.

"Sumo, stop," Connor got out, finally finding the strength to move closer, "He's... H-he's gone." Saying it aloud broke him, collapsing to his knees at Hank's side. The RK doesn't understand. He was doing so well, wasn't he? He had cut down on his drinking, talking about his problems, Connor had even managed to convince Hank to start going to therapy. What had gone wrong? How could he have failed? The one person who needed him most.

"Dad... Please, please wake up," Connor pleaded through his sobs, knowing it wasn't going to happen. He can't do this without him. He wouldn't even be alive without Hank.

Seeing the gun, Connor acted on impulse, picking it up and pointing it to his own head and squeezing the trigger.

*click*

Nothing. He tries again and again. *click* *click* *click*

Connor tosses the gun in anguish. It only ever had one bullet. One shot, but it shattered the lives of everyone who knew Hank.

It's too much for him to take, slamming his head against the tile floor. Sumo is barking at him, biting at his jacket, his arm, trying to get the android to stop. On the third hit, the tile shatters. On the fifth, Connor is out.

....

He awakes screaming on the floor, tangled in his bedsheets. His head hurts, thirium on the corner of the nightstand. None of that matters. Connor is immediately up and running out the door of his apartment. He doesn't even bother with shoes, wearing only his tank top and sweatpants. He runs down the street, turning this way and that, only living a few blocks from Hank's street.

Once he's at Hank's, Connor runs up to the door, realizing he had forgotten his key in his rush, frantically banging on the door and ringing the doorbell. He heard Sumo barking, dredging up memories of his dream. Just as he was about to take off for the kitchen window he knows he can break into, Hank opens the door, gun in hand.

"The fuck is-" He's cut off by Connor disarming him, wrapping his arms tightly around his middle, "Connor?!?"

The RK was shaking, burying his face into the man's neck as he sobbed.

"What happened? Are you hurt?" Hank was freaking out, not sure what's going on. The android only shakes his head, continuing to sob. He's been through something similar with him while he was living here, sleep-deprived mind piecing together what happened. He hugs Connor back with a sigh, "Come on, son. Let's sit down and figure this out."

He half walks, half drags Connor inside, shutting the door behind them. Sumo is beside them, wondering why his weird-smelling human was upset. They get to the couch, Hank urging Connor to sit down with him. The android complied, but still refused to let him go. By now, Hank knew better than to try and pry him off or talk, simply holding him until Connor calmed down on his own. Sumo climbed up on the RK's opposite side, lying against him and offering his own form of comfort.

It was a solid 30 minutes before Connor was calm enough to release his death grip. Hank had been dozing off, the adrenaline having left him some time ago.

"I'm sorry, Hank," Connor apologized, still pressed against him, though much looser so he could actually breathe. Hank assuming it was for banging on his door in the middle of the night until he continued, "I'm sorry I couldn't save you."

"Save me? What are you talking about?" Hank grouched, "I'm sober more often than not, you keep pestering me about my diet, and you even got me going to a fucking shrink. You've done enough. You can't fix everything, Connor, but... You've gotten me through a dark time in my life."

Connor pulled away from his shoulder, looking the man in the eye, his own still wet with tears mixed with thirium from the decent gash on his forehead, "Then why would you...?" he couldn't bring himself to say it, more tears welling in his eyes. He doesn't want to lose Hank. There has to be something more.

"Why would I-" it clicked what Connor was trying to say, "Oh, son. Is that what your nightmare was about? I ain't about to off myself. You don't have to worry about that." He hugged Connor tighter, "I still have my bad times, but they're not as bad as they used to be. I'm retired from that game. 'Sides, I can't leave you without teaching you about culture. Real culture. Not what people nowadays are calling it." Hank have him a final squeeze before releasing him, "Now, let's get that wrapped up," he gestured to his forehead, "then we can find a movie to watch."

"It's late, Hank. Shouldn't you get back to bed?" Connor asked in a small voice. He's already taken enough of Hank's time and he needs rest. The Lieutenant was having none of it, standing up to grab a bandage and some blue blood.

"fuck that. I'll sleep when I'm..." He looked at Connor, caught by his said puppy-dog stare, "yeah, I'll get some sleep later. It's my day off, I'll spend it how I like. Just, get comfortable. No point in runnin' off. Didn't even bother with shoes." Hank murmured the last part as he walked away. He loves the kid, but he might be next in line to see the shrink or he'll be giving Hank a heart attack one of these days.

[danganronpaimaginess]

Danganronpa Characters Seeing you in a Cute Outfit (no despair AU)

~~this is NOT a request. For these headcanons I picked Makoto, Aoi, Nagito, Sonia, Kiibo and Tenko. (I'm on phone, so I'm sorry for the bad layout)I hope you enjoy! ~mod fuyuhiko~~

MAKOTO NAEGI:

-As soon as he looked at you, he looked away. This worried you.

-When you wandered into his vision the second time, you noticed his beet red face. And then it all clicked.

-You began teasing him, poking his cheek and messing up his hair. Makoto puffed his cheeks out in response, albeit still flustered.

-"(y/n), stopppp...y-you look really pretty/handsome...t-today.."

-Makoto stumbled over his words so much you could hardly tell what he was saying. Soon, you deciphered it.

-"Aww, thanks Makoto! You're so sweet." You tackle him down onto the bed he was sitting on. Although you were on top of him, he was still looking everywhere but at you.

-"Makotoooooo, look at meee," you pouted, and he instantly looked over to you, face redder than ever. You chuckled.

-You lept up from the bed, grabbing Makoto's hand and dragging him out the door. "Let's go!"

AOI ASAHINA:

-Aoi was waiting for you in the kitchen, as per usual. You stumbled into the kitchen, wearing a new outfit you bought recently that you fell in love with.

-Aoi heard you open the door, and turned over to you, a donut in her mouth and a paper plate in her hand. Her jaw went slack. The donut fell onto the plate.

-As a red pigment coated her cheeks, she yelled, "(y/n)!!!! You're so beautiful/handsome!!" As she placed her plate onto the counter, she stormed over to you encasing you in a bear hug.

-You could hardly breathe by how tight she was hugging you, and you poked her back to tell her that. With Aoi being an athlete worthy of the title of 'Ultra', she easily managed to lift you up and cuddle you.

-You got flustered "Aoi....We're gonna be l-late.." Aoi remembered your date and let go, placing you on the ground delicately before trying to wrap up a donut and hide in her bag before you could see.

-You quickly caught her and reprimanded her, "Aoi, you're not gonna eat all the food you order at the restaurant if you eat all the donuts!" "The restaurant...oh! Right! Our date!"

-She ran to you so fast you could hardly see her and she grabbed your hand and sprinted to the door so fast you had just about enough time to grab your wallet.

-Even at the end of your date, she still begged for donuts (she made you take the route that has a Dunkin'Donuts along the way.)

NAGITO KOMAEDA

-Nagito always worshipped your fashion choices. He always thought you were so attractive and gorgeous, and he took any chance he could get to tell you that.

-You had put on an outfit that you were sure Nagito had never seen before. It was a Saturday, and in a self indulging mood, you decided to feel good about yourself. Nagito was sitting on the (favourite dark colour) couch in your living room.

-You walked over and sat next to him, a cup of (favourite drink) in one hand, a cup of Nagito's preferred drink in the other. "Hi, Nagito. How've you been, babe?"

-Nagito didn't look at you as you sat down, only turning to grab his drink. He reached out for it, but he froze as soon as he locked his eyes onto you. You silently cheered in celebration, happy that your new look really was quite jaw dropping.

-"(y/n), you're...you're perfect! Trash like myself doesn't deserve you... why'd you decide to dress up today?"

-You explained why you felt so confident today and he placed his cup down to embrace you tightly, one hand moving from your spine to your side, the other playing with your hair. (If you are uncomfortable with that, imagine him doing something else that calms you down)

-You immediately returned the embrace and soaked in the sweet whispers and compliments Nagito gave you, until he broke the hug and stood up. Having already being dressed, he grabbed his phone and your hand and led you outside.

-You two bought bagels at the end of your sudden date.

SONIA NEVERMIND:

-Sonia was attracted to you from day one. You were the only one she actually spoke to for the first few months of Hope's Peak Academy. You were a huge fan of Sparking Justice, just like her, so you two instantly clicked.

-Sonia asked you out after some time. You were over the moon! She got you treats and little trinkets all the time, which you told her was a bit too much. She didn't listen, and she showered you with expensive gifts 24/7.

-On a certain day, you and Sonia had a date you had never been on before; an anime binge date. Sonia invited you over to her... house? mansion? palace? as per usual, and as soon as she opened the door she froze like a deer in the headlights.

-You were dressed in a simple but comfortable outfit, perfect for cuddling and staying home. Sonia threw her arms around you, squealing adorably over you.

-"(y/n)! You're so pretty/handsome! I am absolutely in love with your style! Come in, come in!" She ushered you in after she was done ogling you.

-You two binge watched plenty of original anime, and before you knew it the sun was setting and you were falling asleep, head on Sonia's lap.

-She snapped countless pictures of you on her pretty dark purple phone, all at different angles. You would soon wake up to her adorable giggling, peeking over to see your sleeping face.

-"S-Sonia!" "I'm sorry, my beloved! I could not hold back!" As much as you wanted the pictures deleted, you couldn't help but melt at her cute giggles and smile.

KIIBO:

-Well, you guessed it; he overheated as soon as he laid his eyes on your form. How could he not? You were so handsome/beautiful to him, his servos starting freezing up.

-You got scared as he began to scream in a low monotone voice, falling in the process. You grabbed the boy before he could hit the ground, his eyes locked on yours the whole time.

-You took him to Miu, who lived in the apartment down the hall. Even she commented on your appearance! "Hell yeah, (y/n)! You look sexy as hell!"

-You set out as soon as Kiibo woke up, and he almost overheated when he saw you once again. Miu smacked him out of it.

-Kiibo, trying not to overheat, lead you to an adorable picnic he had set up. You got so impressed; you hugged him tight and he could feel his servos jitter as he hugged you back.

-As clichè as it was, you loved it to bits. Kiibo tried his best. Kiibo, who struggled to talk most the time, complimented you as much as he possibly could. When it got too cold to stay out for longer, you both went home.

-You passed out on his shoulder as soon as you got through the door. Kiibo almost overheated for the nth time that night, but he dragged you over to your bed as he tried ignoring it.

-He was probably going to overheat seeing you in the same outfit tomorrow, but oh well.

TENKO CHABASHIRA:

-Tenko was always going around insulting the men around her; you could hear her from miles away. She was quite easy to track down.

-That said, you were determined to show her your new outfit that you based around her own. It took a while, but you managed to find her in the hallway, pointing and aggressively raising her voice at poor Shuichi.

-You walked over to the bow haired girl, sliding your arms over her neck and embracing her in a hug. She got scared, but she noticed your head on her shoulder. "Ah! (Y/n), you're here! I'm happy to se-"

-It was then that she noticed your outfit. It didn't take long for her face to turn a rich red. She covered her face with her arms and pointed to you.

-"(y/n), w-what are you w-w-wearing!?" She stuttered and stumbled, her voice breaking quite often. "I was planning outfits, and I wanted to match with you, babe!"

-You knew exactly how to get her into a flustered and jumbled mess. Although she was quite tough, you were the only one who was able to break through that and always managed to make her a shy girl around you.

-"H-hey! We should go out somewhere...like, like right now!" "Tenko, it's almost time for class-" "Doesn't matter! We're leaving, now!" She sped through the exit with you in tow.

-While you two enjoyed your very unexpected date, Shuichi stood there shortly after you left, more or less confused on what he had witnessed.

[bxcketbarnes]

Insomnia

Pairing: Jonathan Pine x Reader

Words: 3900+

Author’s Note: If you haven’t seen The Night Manager you definitely should. It’s super good and Tom looks incredible as usual. I hope whoever reads this likes it!

Your eyes bulge at the beautiful scenery of Milan as your school group walks towards the hotel you'll be residing in for two weeks. You're so glad that you could afford to come on this trip, wanting to visit Italy for a while, since you were a small child.

"Do you think we'll find some hot guys to fuck around with?" Kayla asks as the two of you walk into the fancy hotel.

You let out a snort and shake your head in reply, looking over at the short brunette. "In the time frame that we have? Maybe. I wouldn't think you can achieve more than just a hookup though," you explain to her as your teacher checks you guys in.

"Hm, true, but it doesn't hurt to try," she states and you nod your head in agreement.

"Okay, everyone!" Your teacher calls out to gather the group's attention. "We've got six rooms with two beds in each room. There's twelve of you so pair up and grab a key."

You and Kaya give each other a look before laughing, the two of you walking towards your teacher. You smile at the older woman as she writes your names down before handing you a key.

"Kaya and Y/N… room 145," she mumbles and you grab the key from her hands. The two of you head towards your room, deciding to relax a bit before you all head out again.

Hours Later…

You toss and turn in the queen-sized bed, a soft sigh leaving your lips as the insomnia kicks in. You throw your covers off of your body before getting up. You quietly grab your room key and glance over at Kayla, seeing her dead asleep.

You envy her, wishing you could be dead asleep. You've been dealing with insomnia since your early teens. You'd be surprised if you ever got a full eight-hour sleep. Most of the time it's about four or five hours.

You hold your breath as you quietly open the door to your room, slipping out before the hall lights can shine into the room. You release a breath after you hear the lock of the door click. You walk around the gorgeous hotel, your eyes looking at every art piece you walk by.

"I'm really surprised Mrs. Smith chose this hotel," you mumble to yourself while heading towards the lobby as you remember seeing a little seating area next to a fireplace.

You didn't notice the man standing at the reception desk as you walk into the lobby, your arms crossing over your chest as you head straight towards the loveseat sofa. The man at the desk watches you as you sit down before grabbing one of the magazines.

His eyes glance towards his watch to see that it's almost 1:45 in the morning. It's not often he sees any guests at this time of hour. You run a hand through your hair as you prop your feet up, another quiet sigh leaving your lips.

"Is there anything I can help you with, Miss?" An accented voice asks you and you jump in your seat, looking over your shoulder.

Your breath hitches in your throat as a tall man stands beside the couch, his blue suit making his blue eyes stand out just as much. Holy shit he's gorgeous. "U-Uh, no I'm okay," you mumble shyly and the man smiles.

"Are you sure? I can get you a water bottle or something," he offers and you feel your cheeks blush.

"Okay, sure," you smile softly and the sandy brunette nods before walking away from you.

The man returns with a bottle of water and holds it out for you to take. You thank him quietly while grabbing it, feeling your fingertips brush against his. You press your lips together as you could feel butterflies roaming around your stomach.

"May I sit with you?" He asks politely and you nod your head in reply. The man sits in the chair beside you, his blue eyes looking towards the fireplace. "I'm Jonathan Pine, the Night Manager."

"Y/N L/N," you introduce while tucking a strand of hair behind your ear and you lean forwards to set the magazine back onto the coffee table. "So, you stay up all night to watch the place?"

A chuckle leaves Jonathan's throat as he nods his head, crossing one of his legs. "I do, yes. Been doing it for years now," he explains and you hum in response.

"Don't you ever get… lonely?" You quietly ask and Jonathan furrows his eyebrows together.

"I've never really thought about that, honestly. I guess I keep myself occupied enough to not really think about it," he mentions and you grab a hold of the pillow beside you, hugging it to your chest. "Real question is why are you up at two in the morning?"

A chuckle leaves your lips as you lean against the arm of the couch, adjusting your position. You prop your feet up on the cushions as you turn towards Jonathan. "Oh, this is usual for me. I suffer from insomnia and don't usually fall asleep until three or three-thirty," you tell him and the man frowns slightly. "That's why I asked you if you ever get lonely because I'm lonely every night."

"Do you want some tea? I have this tea recipe I use when I'm trying to sleep," Jonathan offers and you smile at him, fond of his kindness.

"If you think it'll work, go for it. I could use the sleep," you joke and earn a laugh from the blue-eyed man as well.

Jonathan stands up from his chair before holding out a hand to you. "Come," he smiles softly and you hesitantly reach out to grab his hand.

He pulls you up from the couch and leads you towards his office. "Have you been to Milan before?" He asks while the two of you walk into the office, Jonathan shutting the door behind you.

"First time, actually," you tell him and fiddle with your fingers. "But, I've wanted to come here since I was younger. I'm glad that one of my college courses was able to make my dream come to life."

"That's pretty neat. So, you're here with a school?" Jonathan questions while motioning for you to sit at the small table. "You must be the one staying here for two weeks."

You hum in response as you watch him fill the kettle. How are you so calm right now? This man is beyond gorgeous. You think to yourself as your fingertips tap along the wooden table.

Jonathan grabs a cup from one of his drawers and sets it on the table in front of you. "I hope I'm not making things weird for you," he mumbles and you shake your head immediately.

"Oh, you're fine, Jonathan," you reassure him with a smile. "It's nice to have someone actually care? Like, I've roamed around places I've stayed and no one's stopped to have a conversation with me. Let alone make me tea."

You rest your chin against the palm of your hand as Jonathan lets out a chuckle. "I'm not like many people, darling. Plus, it's my job to take care of our guests," he informs you and your chest clenches a bit, the smile dropping from your lips.

So you didn't do it just because? You hum as you're suddenly not feeling up for tea. You stand up from your chair, gaining the man's attention. "I'm not feeling well," you whisper as you walk towards his office door. "I'm going to head back to my room."

The smile on Jonathan's lips fell as you leave his office without letting him get a word in. He clears his throat while turning off the kettle, not needing it anymore before letting out a sigh. "Was it something I said?" He questions himself while heading back towards his reception desk.

-

A knock on your hotel room door wakes you from your slumber, a small groan leaving your lips as the sun peaks into the room. "Be up and ready in half an hour!" Mrs. Smith calls from outside the door.

You look towards Kayla, seeing her bed empty and already made. You rub the sleep from your eyes and sit up slowly, glancing towards the alarm clock to see it was almost nine in the morning. "Jesus Christ," you groan and lay back down, placing your arm over your eyes.

"Morning, sunshine!" Kayla beams as she walks out of the bathroom. You move your arm to look over at her before letting out a grunt. "That's what happens when you roam around the hotel for two hours."

You sit up suddenly, your eyebrows furrowing together in confusion. How does she know that? "What- I-"

"Don't even try to come up with an excuse. I woke up to go to the bathroom last night and you were nowhere in sight," she explains and you deeply sigh.

"Sorry. I have insomnia," you tell her and her eyes soften a bit. "I went to the lobby to sit by the fireplace for a bit."

Kayla sits down beside you as she brushes through her wet hair. "How come you didn't tell me about this? We're best friends," she mumbles sadly and you shrug your shoulders.

"Not many people know. I usually just keep it to myself so no one else has to bother with it," you confess while fiddling with your fingers.

"Well, I care about you. Don't you forget that," she whispers and you give her a soft smile,  thanking her quietly. "Now get dressed. I need some coffee in me."

Kayla patiently waits as you get ready, the brunette scrolling through her phone. You tie your tennis shoes before standing up,  letting her know that you're ready. The two of you walk towards the lobby, your heart dropping a bit as you see Jonathan standing at the desk still.

When does he leave? 

Your friend drags you up to the reception desk, watching her eyes widen as she takes in the man standing in front of her. Jonathan looks up from the computer he's typing on meets your eyes first.

"Good Morning, Y/N," he greets with a soft smile before turning his attention to Kayla, "Miss, what can I help you guys with?"

Kayla quickly glances your way before telling him that she would like a coffee. He simply nods his head and moves away from the desk, doing as she asked. "He knows your name?" She asks you as soon as he disappears.

You rub the back of your neck and nod your head in reply. "I met him last night," you tell her and she slaps your arm, causing you to groan. "What the hell?!"

"You didn't think to tell me you met one of the most handsome guys in Milan?!" She laughs and you shrug your shoulders, feeling your cheeks blush. "Did something happen?"

"No. I'll tell you about it later," you mumble as Jonathan comes back with the coffee Kayla ordered.

She takes it from him with a smile before walking away from the two of you while giving you a look. You hated her sometimes. You think and chuckle to yourself.

"Do you need anything, Y/N?" He asks softly and you shake your head in answer. "Uhm, if you don't mind me asking… have I said something wrong last night that made you run away?"

You press your lips together before looking up at him. "I felt special. You actually made me feel special by taking time out of your night to talk to me… when no one has ever done it, and you ruined it by telling me it's just part of your job. So, what you're saying is that you wouldn't keep me company and offer me tea to help me sleep if you weren't the Night Manager?" You rant on, feeling yourself getting angrier by the second.

Jonathan's eyes widen slightly as you breathe heavily, moving to walk away from him when his hand grabs a hold of your wrist. "I'm sorry," he mumbles and you can see the sadness in his blue eyes. "I… I didn't mean to make you feel that way. That was never my intention."

You pry your wrist from his hand and give him a sad smile. "I've got to go," you mumble quietly as your group begins to walk out the door.

Kayla calls out to you and motions for you to come along when you glance back at Jonathan once more. You swallow thickly and your heart breaks at the look on his face. You shouldn't feel like this. You just met. You take a deep breath as you catch up to everyone else, linking arms with your best friend before walking out the hotel doors.

Jonathan taps his fingers against the desk and scrunches his nose. "That's your girl?" A random person asks and Jonathan glances towards one of the hotel customers.

"Oh, no, sir," he politely tells him with a small smile.

The man scoffs in response and glances back towards the front door. "Could've fooled me. The way the two of you looked at each other. It was like you've been together for years," he explains and Jonathan swallows the lump in his throat before clearing it.

"Heh, no. She's a guest just like you, sir," Jonathan awkwardly laughs while the gentleman working the day shift stands beside the blue-eyed man.

-

"Are you going to visit Jonathan again tonight?" Kayla asks as the group walks into the hotel. It's almost nine-thirty at night when you all return, most students feeling exhausted after today's activities.

You shrug your shoulders and glance towards the reception desk to see Jonathan relieving the man who you assumed works the day shift. His blue eyes meet yours and the two of you smile softly at one another.

"I don't know, maybe," you mumble as the two of you walk towards your room.

"Good Evening, everyone," Jonathan greets and your teacher gives him a warm smile.

You glance over your shoulder at him as you can't help but feel somewhat entranced by the man. A small sigh leaves your lips as you continue towards your room.

"You should. I can tell that the two of you have this unspoken thing going on," Kayla mentions and you hum in response. "I'm just saying… you don't have to follow my advice."

You're twiddling with your fingers as you stare off into the darkness. Tonight's the one night you wish you could fall asleep since you've been out in the sun all day. You're exhausted,  yet here you are, not able to get some shut-eye.

A sigh leaves your lips as you find yourself getting up, deciding to roam around for the second night in a row. Albeit you're a bit nervous to run into Jonathan, but part of you wants to see him again.

You throw a hoodie on before leaving your room quietly. You cross your arms over your chest as you wander into the lobby, seeing Jonathan standing at the reception desk still.

"Hey," you softly call out and the dirty blonde picks his head up, his blue eyes meeting yours before a smile comes to his lips.

"Y/N," Jonathan smiles and lets out a small chuckle, "I'm very surprised the Milan sun hasn't knocked you out."

A snort leaves your lips as you nod your head and rest your arms against the desk in front of you. "Honestly, I am too. I was hoping it would," you mumble loud enough for him to hear.

"If you want I can make that tea I told you about," he offers and your heart flutters at how gentlemanly he is.

"Do you have a girlfriend, Jonathan?" You suddenly ask and his eyes widen a bit before shaking his head. You tsk in response and look into his ocean blue eyes. "It's a shame because anyone would be so lucky to have you."

Jonathan's heart pounds against his chest at your compliment, having not heard it before from a guest… a stranger. A smile comes to his lips before taking a glance down at his shiny shoes.

"Well, thank you, darling. That's quite sweet of you to say." You chuckle softly as Jonathan adjusts the tie he's wearing. "If you're comfortable with it… would you want to come to my room? I can make you some tea and we can just hang out, get to know each other."

You bite your bottom lip softly as you think about it before nodding your head in reply. "As long as you don't murder me, sure," you joke with him and the blue-eyed man lets out a laugh while shaking his head.

"I promise, darling," he grins with a chuckle and logs out of the computer before walking around the desk. "This way."

You fiddle with your fingers as you follow Jonathan down the hall. He glances over his shoulder at you a few times and you give him a reassuring smile when his eyes meet yours.

"What did you guys do today?" Jonathan asks while inviting you into the spacious room.

"Oh, we did so much," you laugh while sitting down in the computer chair, hooking one of your legs beneath you. "We went for breakfast at this cute little Cafe near the hotel and then we went to all the famous tourist attractions. I swear my eyes have never been so wide before. This place is beautiful."

Jonathan grins widely as he listens to you rant while making your tea. "I'm glad you're enjoying yourself, darling," he mentions and pours the boiling water into the teacup.

"I'm really glad I was able to afford this trip," you chuckle as Jonathan walks towards you with your tea. You swoon a bit as you hear him call you darling once more, taking the cup from his slender fingers. "Thank you for this."

He sits down beside you on the bed and nods his head in response. "It's no problem. I'm hoping it can help you sleep. If so, I'll send you one to your room each night before bed," he offers and your heart flutters in your chest.

"But then I won't be able to have these late-night conversations with you," you whisper while looking up at him through your lashes.

You drink a sip of your tea as it becomes quiet between the two of you. You hum in delight at the taste of the drink and set it down on the nightstand beside you.

"Is it weird that I feel so close to you when I barely know you?" You suddenly ask and Jonathan raises an eyebrow. A dry laugh leaves your lips as you fiddle with your fingers. "I must sound crazy. It's just-"

"I feel it too," he mumbles loud enough for you to hear and your breath hitches in your throat. "There was this customer yesterday… he said that the way you and I looked at each other was the way a couple who's been together for years looks at each other."

You swallow thickly as you can feel yourself growing tired. "Maybe this is God bringing us together or something…" You trail off as you lay back on the bed. "Damn that tea really helps. Are you sure you didn't spike it?"

Jonathan frowns at your joke and shakes his head in response. "Of course not, darling. I would never," he softly tells you and you smile up at him before your eyes flutter shut.

The blue-eyed man stands up from the bed and adjusts your body so you're lying completely on the bed. He covers you up with the duvet before grabbing your cup of tea and places it in the little kitchenette area.

"Sleep well," he whispers to your unconscious body before flicking off the light and returning to the lobby.

-

Kayla's eyes widen when she wakes up as you're not sleeping in the bed beside her. "Y/N," she calls out, and her heart pounds in her chest when you don't reply. The brunette flings herself out of her bed and rushes towards the bathroom to see it empty. "Oh, no."

She quickly throws some clothes on before running out of the room. Kayla makes her way towards the lobby as she spots Jonathan standing at the reception desk, talking to the man who'll take over for him.

"Jonathan, right?" She calls out to him and the dirty blonde picks his head up.

"Yes, Miss?" He asks politely and Kayla breathes heavily as she frantically looks around.

"I… have you seen Y/N? She's not in our room," Kayla mumbles and Jonathan gives her a small smile while placing a hand on her arm in reassurance.

"Do not fret. Y/N fell asleep in my room last night. That's where she is now if you want me to bring you to her," Jonathan offers and Kayla lets out a breath of relief.

Thank God. The brunette thinks while nodding her head in reply. Jonathan leads her to where you're currently finishing up breakfast while watching whatever the blue-eyed man put on the television.

You pick your head up when you hear the door opening, your eyes widening a bit as you see Kayla walk into the room before Jonathan. "You gave me a scare, Y/N!" She immediately says and you give her a small smile while mumbling an apology. "I'm just thankful you were in Jonathan's hands rather than a stranger."

"Jonathan is kind of a stranger, Kayla," you laugh while covering your mouth, finishing the food you're eating. "But, I get what you mean."

A sigh leaves your best friend's lips as she crosses her arms over her chest. "So, what happened?"

"We were sitting here talking and whatnot and the tea he made me that would help me sleep better worked quicker than I expected it to. I ended up falling asleep on the bed," you explain to her as your eyes move to Jonathan, seeing him standing in the corner of his room.

"You take good care of her or I swear to-"

"Kayla!" You scold her embarrassingly, feeling your cheeks heat up as Jonathan lets out a laugh.

"I promise to take good care of her. No matter what," he says in his beautiful English accented voice.

Your best friend lets out a sigh of relief before turning to leave the room. "I'll let Mrs. Smith know that you're feeling ill," she gives you a wink and walks out the door.

"God," you mumble to yourself and hide your face in your hands. You feel Jonathan sit down beside you, his hand resting on your blanket-covered thigh. "Sorry about her she can be-"

"It's quite alright, darling. I understand where she's coming from," he grins and you giggle softly. "But, now that you're ill… I can spend the day with you. If that's what you want anyway."

You grin widely and look up at the beautiful man. "That would be fun, Jonathan," you tell him and lean forward to kiss his cheek.

Jonathan's eyes stare into yours as he brings his hands to your cheeks before connecting his lips with yours. A small gasp leaves your lips, eyes widening before fluttering shut. You begin to kiss him back while bringing one of your hands to his shoulder, your fingers gripping the suit jacket he's wearing.

After about a minute Jonathan pulls away from you, a stupid grin on both of your lips as the two sit in silence. "Okay… that… felt really good," you whisper out causing the blue-eyed man to chuckle in response.

"Well, there's more where that came from."

[skycollides]

Hi are your requests open? If so I LOVEDD the last Billy Russo fic you wrote, with that being said, can you write something with smut&angst? For Billy Russo please

Hello, I love your writing. Can you give me something smutty and filthy for Billy Russo? If your ok with that?

Thank your for reading my work. It means a lot!💜

I combined these to I hope that's okay!

I Need You

Billy Russo x Reader

Authors note: I apologize in advance for grammar or spelling mistakes

English isn’t my native language.

Let me know if you want to be tagged.

Requests are open. Feel free to send them in.

Warning: angst, smut, mentions of body fluids, swearing

Words: 2.170

Billy is more and more busy with Anvil. You actually thought after he quit the Army you will be able to spend more time with him, to have him around more often. You always felt so lonely when he left to another tour but having him home now doesn’t change the way you feel. You still feel lonely. Actually you feel more lonely than before. You barely see Billy anymore. You wake up in the morning he is gone, you go to bed at night he’s still out. The only time you see him is when you wake up in the middle of the night. You’ve reached the point where you cry yourself to sleep nearly everyday because you can’t take the distance and these feelings anymore.

It’s time for a change because you don’t wanna continue living like this anymore. You asked your cousin if she would take you in for a couple of days, at least until you know what to do. So here you are packing a bag while crying your eyes out. You’re so scared that this will be the very end of your relationship. Still you are taking only the necessary stuff hoping that you won’t have to stay long. Once you’re done you take the bag and leave your shared apartment.

Billys Pov.

Billy comes home earlier than the last couple of months and he is greeted with an empty apartment.

’’Y/n? Babe where are you?’’ asks loudly but there is no answer. He searches the whole apartment for you but you’re not there. So he decides to text you.

Hey baby,

I’m at home where are you?

It’s lonely without you here.

It takes a few minutes before he gets a reply.

Guess now you know 

how I’ve been feeling since

you came back from the army.

First your head was still over there

and now it is with Anvil.

I’m not really mad Billy, 

more sad but hey people change

maybe it’s a sign that we 

aren’t the people we used to be.

That’s okay! 

Billy reads the text over and over again. He’s now thinking about the past couple of weeks even months and he realizes his mistake. He didn’t give you the attention you deserve and need. He also realizes how much he missed you and how scary the thought of loosing you is.

Come home sweetheart.

Please come home.

I beg you Y/n.

I need you as much as you need me.

I love you.

Billy puts his phone on the coffee table in front of him and hopes that you will return to him.

Your Pov.

You read  the message and hand your phone over to your cousin. She reads the message and looks at you waiting for a reaction. 

’’What should I do?’’ you ask her and she gives you your phone back.

’’Go home and talk to him. I mean you just got here couple of hours ago and I don’t wanna get a rid of you but you two should talk. At some point you’ll have to so why not now.’’

’’Looks like I’ll be going home then.’’ you say and get off the couch.

You take the your stuff hug you cousin and drive home.

———————————————————————————————————————————

’’Hey’’ you say softly and drop the bag. Billy looks up to you and smiles.

’’Hey. Thank you for coming home Y/n. Come here.’’ he says and holds his hand out for you. You walk over to him and sit down next to him.

’’Tell me everything that’s been bothering you Y/n. I know I fucked up. I need to know how much my actions actually did affect you.’’

’’Everything?’’

’’Everything. Don’t hold back Y/n.’’

’’I cried myself to sleep nearly everyday. I feel like shit Billy. I feel like you forget about me, like you don’t care about me anymore. I feel more alone having you here than back then when you were with the Marines. When you were on those tours you at least called me and send me letters. You didn’t bother doing that over the past couple of weeks. The text you sent me earlier - it was the first I love you I received in a really long time. All I know is that I won’t continue living like this. I wont continue feeling like this. I don’t want you to throw away your dreams and I won’t make you chose between me and Anvil.  We have two opportunities right know Billy. Whether we go separate ways, which I don’t want at all or you find a way to have both, Anvil and me. Then you need to work on your time management because I’m not a doll to throw in a corner and get it back when it suits you. What happens now is on you.’’  you say and he gets off the couch leaving you there which makes you cry even more. He soon returns with your favorite blanket and a pack of tissues. He sits down next to you again, hands you the tissues and wraps the blanket around you. You take them gladly, blow your nose and wipe the tears away.

Billy pulls you in his arms stoking your back.

’’I’m so sorry baby. I worked so hard on Anvil, on my future - our future that I forgot what’s most important. You my love. I want to be able to take care of you. While I put all my effort in Anvil I stopped putting effort in us. I stop working on weekends. Saturdays and Sundays are ours from now on and I will be home sooner during the week. All I can say is that I am sorry. I love you with everything I have Y/n you’re the one for me. Don’t give up on me.’’

’’Promise?’’ 

’’Pinky promise’’ he says and holds out his finger.

’’Idiot’’ you say and laugh.

’’There is one question left Y/n.’’ you give him a questioning look at him and raise your eyebrow.

’’How can I make it up to you?’’

’’I’ve got an idea Russo.’’ you say and smirk. You grab his hand and drag him to the bedroom.

’’I love the way your brain works baby.’’ he says and you push him on the bed before you slip out of your dress.

’’Go gonna strip for me?’’ Billy asks.

’’You’re going to make it up to me not the other way around. You Mr. Russo don’t deserve it. So no I won’t be stripping for you and now get out of your clothes.’’ you reply.

’’Someone’s desperate.’’ he says and smirks.

’’Considering the fact that I can’t even remember the last time we had sex, I’m allowed to be.’’ you say as you watch him undress.

’’Well get over here then ba-.’’ before he can fishes his sentence you’re on top of him , straddling him, cutting him off with a kiss. 

’’I need you Billy!’’ you say not caring how desperate it my sound.

Billy pulls his face closer to his, kissing you like his life is depending on it. His hand goes straight to you neck keeping you place. 

’’Get off me Y/n.’’ he says after he releases your lips and you sit down next to him. You take off your bra while Billy takes care of your panties. As soon as you’re completely naked you lay down.

’’Relax baby I’m gonna take care of you.’’ Billy says pushing two fingers in your mouth. You suck on them right away, getting them nice and wet. Billy pulls his fingers out he starts rubbing your clit. You let out a sigh.

’’Can’t believe you’re already this wet for me. We haven’t even started yet.’’ he says and pushes his fingers inside of you. You moan loudly finally being this close to Billy again. He starts to move them in and out slowly, not wanting to make you feel uncomfortable since its been a while since you were intimate.

While he is pumping his fingers in and out you start rubbing your clit looking straight into Billys eyes.

’’Does that feel good babygirl?’’ 

’’So good babe’’ you say and whimper as the pleasure is building up more and more.

’’Such a good girl you are Y/n. Are you close baby?’’

’’Yes. Please let me cum.’’ you beg as you feel your orgasm building up.

All of the sudden Billy slaps your hand away and removes his fingers licking them clean.

’’You won’t cum unless my dick’s inside of you. You taste incredible by the way.’’ he says once he is done licking his fingers.

’’On your hands and knees Y/n. NOW!’’ Billy demands and you do as you’re told. He gets behind you right away. His hand moves to his now hard cock, stroking it a few times before bringing it to your pussy. He pushes the head between your folds moving up and down to tease you.

’’Stop teasing me and fuck me Russo!’’

Billy pushes himself inside you carefully. You hold onto his pillow which in laying next to you trying not to cum right away. Once he’s inside you all the way he waits a moment to make sure you okay.

’’Go on babe’’ you say and he starts to push in and out of you faster now making you jolt forward.

’’Fuck Billy just like that. Don’t make me wait that long for you ever again.’’

’’Never again Y/n. Fuck I don’t know how I was surviving without this tight beautiful pussy of yours. Shit you feel so good babygirl.’’ he says and your pussy clenches around him because of it. Billy lets out a low moan. 

’’Tell me what you want Y/n’’ he says and smacks your ass a couple of times.

’’I want you and I want you hard and fast. Destroy this pussy. Show me who owns it.’’ you beg and after those words there’s no holding back for Billy.

He is now slamming his cock in and out has hard and as fast as he can. He grabs a fist full of you hair and pulls you back into his chest. Once you’re up he wraps his hand around your throat choking you slightly while the other arm wraps around your waist holding you in place.

’’That’s what you wanted right? Am I making you feel good babygirl?’’

’’Yes Billy god yes don’t stop.’’ you say and he pushes you down again.

’’Such a needy girl you are. I swear once I’m done with you, you won’t be able to walk properly for a week.’’ he says and smack you ass hard again.

Billys movements become more and more irregular and you know he is as close as you are.

’’Billy I need to cum. Please let me cum. I beg you. Please’’ you scream.

’’Cum for me baby. Cum all over my cock.’’ he says and you let go.

You arch you back and Billy can’t hold back anymore as he feels your pussy clench around him.

He finds his release inside of you not stopping to thrust inside of you. The both of you are moaning messes not wanting this feeling to end. He stays inside you for a little longer before slowly pulling out. You’re not able to move. You simply lay there trying to deal with this intense orgasm you’re pretty sure you passed out for a moment.

You feel his and your juices dripping out of you.

’’You were absolutely incredible Y/n. Fuck woman.’’ he says but you don’t reply.

’’You okay there baby?’’ Billy asks as he stokes your back. You turn your head to look at him.

’’Mhmmm’’ is all you get out.

’’You’re dick drunk Y/n’’ he says and laughs.

’’Probably. No one’s fucked me as good as you do.’’ you confess and he smiles.

’’We guess what? Your pussy is the best I’ve ever had and you know my record.’’ he says and kisses you deeply.

’’I love you William Russo.’’ you say and stoke his cheek with your thumb.

’’I love you too Y/n L/n more than anything in this world. Ready for round two?’’ he asks

’’Give me break Russo. Ask me again in 10 minutes.’’ you say and he laughs. Billy gets off the bed and pulls his phone out of his jeans before laying down next to you again.

’’What are you doing?’’ you ask.

’’Setting a timer.’’ he replies as if it’s the most normal, thing in the world.

’’You’re impossible.’’ you say shaking your head.

’’And still you love me.’’

’’True that. By the way just because you fucked me good doesn’t mean you’re off the hook yet.’’

’’That’s fine the night is still young and I meant what I said once I’m done you won’t be able to talk anymore. I will destroy this sweet little pussy of yours.’’

’’That’s a threat?’’

’’No babygirl that’s a damn promise.’’ he says with a smirk.

Taglist:

@justatiredfool

@artemisausten

[sasa-gay-yo]

Just Us (Chapter Twelve: Sleep)

←Chapter Eleven

“You know, you don’t always have to come down here. You can stay upstairs.” I set the refilled teacup of the table looking down at the book he’d taken from my bookcase upstairs. It was a fairytale book Mr. Flynn had bought me when I was fourteen, so it couldn’t have been interesting enough for him to reread. He just flipped the page and picked up the teacup in the way he always does and I sat down in the chair next to him, prolonging the closing cleaning process. 

A cold rain washed over Trost today and that made it easy for customers to drag in tons of mud. I’d taken time to clean it at noon, because Levi told me too, but now it was raining again and the last of the customers didn’t stop to wipe their feet on the entry rug. It would take me forever to scrub the dried mud off the floors; probably until after my regularly scheduled dinner time. 

“If I don’t come, you won’t ever clean.” I rolled my eyes at him and reached down to take a sip of his tea. Today, I added a little less honey. 

“I do clean, just apparently not to your standard. I receive full marks on inspection days.” He took the cup directly from my hand and had another sip. The first day he was here, he told me that the backroom was infested with the plague because he saw a single fly and always made me go back and get something while he worked on kneading tomorrow’s fresh bread.

I stood up and grabbed a wash rag, aiming to get all the tables and chairs done in a swift thirty minutes before dragging the mop out of the back room. Levi grabbed my hand lightly when I turned away and I looked back over my shoulder. He had put down the book and his cup, going to stand up.

“I’ll help you. To make it faster.” He took the wash rag from my hand and turned right away to wash the table he’d been sitting at. I smiled at him leaning against another table to watch him. He fit well with the café. It made me think about the future. It was embarrassing to even think about a future in this world, but when I did, it was always Levi behind the counter helping me serve pastries and coffee, no titans or Scouts in sight. Those thoughts had increased over the past three days he’d been here, helping me knead and portion dough every morning after he’d wake me up. It was a slice of domestic bliss combined with us trying to get at each other with words, me, or a body, him.

Over the last few days with him, I realized what might be his issue. While saying and expressing emotion was hard for him, being too personal and intimate, he didn’t have a problem expressing his physical self. Most of the time, physical meant teasing me with his body or a way he held me. Still, every time I would say something suggestive or comment on how cute he looked with a white bandana holding back his hair, he would become a stuttering mess. 

I didn’t want him to confirm it, but it had to be because of what happened in the Underground. He could never be intimate with anyone, never showing his true emotions, but he probably and easily had gotten into physical relationships with others. If that was true, he was more accustomed to using his body to arouse reactions from others then telling them what he was actually thinking or feeling. I’d have to ask him some time, but every time he would do something physical towards me, brush the small of my back when he went behind the counter or come out of the bathroom shirtless, I was too flustered to do anything. Then when it came to actually kissing me (which he hadn’t done yet), being emotionally open, or sleeping in my bed (again, hasn’t done yet), he would shy away because of how intimate it was. It scared him to be open, even with me. I’d have to help him. 

“Levi, what do you think about running the shop with me? In the future when there’s no more titans.” He stopped cleaning the tables, freezing up. I should’ve known better than asking him something like this again.

Just staring down at his hands he answered, his voice tough, “Don’t talk about the future right now.” I was taken aback by his tone, but decided not to push him. Perhaps that was another thing that scared him to talk about. I’d have to romanticize myself. 

Late in the night, when he was reading another one of my books and I was counting out expenses, I was bold enough to ask again. 

“Why can’t we talk about the future?” I saw the same reaction. He froze up, looking at me over the book with a harsh gaze. It also made me shrug away from him.

“I’ll hate myself when it doesn’t happen.” Again, short and terse. This happened a day or two ago too. I asked him about the plans the Scouts had made for next year, thinking if I could plan out when I’d see him next or not. He froze then too, telling me that he didn’t know and there ended that conversation. It made me question what was going on with the Scouts or within Levi. If it was some form of emotional turmoil, if I wasn’t the one getting him to talk, it would just be left up in the air. 

“Do you want to sleep with me tonight?” Again he glanced over the book, but you could see that he was back to his flustered self. 

“Maybe word it better, Eva?” You smirked at him, leaning back on the couch. The tense aura of a few seconds ago faded away. That’s why you weren’t that worried about it currently. He would snap once or twice throughout the day, but everything else was normal. 

“Why? We’ve been dating for almost a year. We could do both.” Again, it was so easy for me to say stuff like this, but my heart was still racing. Every time I asked, I was just waiting for the day he said yes. 

“I haven’t seen you in six months.” I laid down on the couch, looking over at him and he pushed the book up all the way so I couldn’t see his face. I huffed and rolled to look at the ceiling.

“Shouldn’t that be more reason to?” He just shrugged and I closed my eyes, trying to think of something else to talk about. I made him explain everything in our letters and about the work that Erwin had him doing. Besides the obvious confidential stuff, he was just training new cadets and attending meetings about January’s big expedition. When I pushed him about why it was so big, he wouldn’t tell me. It had to involve something important if Levi, Erwin, and Hange all mentioned it. 

“Levi, let’s take a walk.” He grunted ‘no’ from behind the book and I turned to look at him again. How long could he just read books and sit here? How many books has he read since he’s been here? It seems like the only thing he wanted to do was finish my bookshelf and terrorize me with his abs for thirty minutes out of the day. 

“Why noooooooot?” I sat up again on the couch so that you could see his face over the book. Only his eyes shifted to look at me, a neutral expression painting his face. He didn’t see a need for a walk, so he wasn’t going to go on one. I was going to force him. 

“It’s cold.” 

“But you can wear a coat! I can lend you a sweater, we’re the same size. Please? It’s something to do,” I begged, putting my hands together so he saw how much I wanted to go on a walk. I stayed in that position for a minute, hoping he would agree because I looked ridiculous like that. When he sighed and put the book down, I smiled, knowing that I won. He saw my smile too, pulling an annoyed face. 

“Give me a sweater. And we’re not the same size.” I hopped up, running to my room to grab one and pull another one over me. It was incredibly cold outside and I knew that I was going to freeze, but at least I was doing something with Levi. It was better than sitting inside and staring at him all night. 

“If you complain that you’re cold, we’re coming back right away.” He wrapped a green scarf around his neck and I wished I had one like that, pulling only my coat’s hood to cover my ears. Yet, I bounced down the stairs, staring up at him from the bottom as he took his normal pace. It made me giddy inside, going on my first night walk with him. This was something that I would do often, even in the Underground. When I’d came to Mr. Flynn, he still couldn’t get me to stop. I would sneak out and walk around Trost at one in the morning, just letting the time pass by. It was near two now.

Jonas used to walk with me sometimes. When he’d stay at my house, I’d force him up for a walk and would have to hold him up as we walked. Now, I guess it was Levi who was entrapped in my tradition. At least he rarely slept. It would wake me up sometimes, not getting used to his presence in the house. A door opening, a candle lit in the bathroom, or the sound of a teapot hitting the metal of the sink would rouse me at four or five, only to realize it was Levi.  I wondered how many books of mine he read at night when I was sleeping. 

“The streets are so empty now. Normally, there are people coming in and out of bars still.” He just walked next to me, hands in his pockets. I was the leader, taking him down the main road, having no rhyme or reason in your direction. Wherever I would end up, I’d probably been there before and were able to walk back  home. 

“Do you always walk at this time?” He raised an eyebrow at me, and I smiled knowing why he was asking that question. I knew if I answered, he’d reprimand me for walking alone at night. 

“Not always. I haven’t since Wall Maria fell. It’s just a way to clear my mind.”

“I’m sure this cold would freeze anyone’s brain, yes.” He brought his hands up to his mouth, blowing hot air on them. I did the same as my pockets weren’t really helping in keeping the cold away.

“It’s nice in the summertime, but I do prefer colder nights. That’s how it was when I was younger.” We both turned a corner, now at Trost’s city center. The lanterns were on their last bit of oil for the night, so everything was dark except for the moonlight. It was pretty, but it would be better if the courtyard was taken better care of. After Maria, no one cared for pretty things. The titans would eat us, trimmed flower beds or not. One nice thing to look at was Levi and the way the moonlight reflected off of his hair and skin. Funny how he was the brightest at night. 

“Hange once told me that people stay awake late at night because they’re unable to control the day. One doesn’t have to worry about others if they’re the only one up, so they stay up to relish in it.”

“Is that why you stay up so late?” He laughed lowly, shoving his hands back in his pockets as we exited the courtyard and went back to only having the light of the oil lamps lining the street. He went back to being dull. 

“Perhaps. It’s not the only reason. I’m asking you if that’s why you go on these walks. You’re able to experience the world you live in without all the annoying ramblings of people.” I looked up at the sky, thinking about why I took these walks. It really wasn’t any philosophical reason like he was mocking it up to be. Whenever I took walks in the Underground, I never got to be away from people, so that probably wasn’t why. 

“I… I don’t know why I walk. It seems to be relaxing. Maybe since I spend the day inside a room with people coming in and out, it’s better to end the night out here. I can think clearly without someone asking me for a refill. Besides, I don’t stay up late compared to you. After I get home, I’m going to bed. What will you be doing?” I shivered as a cold wind blew down the alleyway and I saw the way he glanced over at me, waiting for me to complain. I made sure to pull my coat tighter around me, but keep my mouth shut. He would turn back just because he wanted to spite me. 

Surprisingly, he lifted his scarf off his head, and shoved it over mine, pulling it tight. He mumbled something about not getting sick under his breath, and I smiled, pulling the scarf above my nose. It was warm, and so were my cheeks after that small display of care. Even if he messed up my hair, it was worth it. I was warm and got to smell him as I walked.

“I usually sleep for an hour and then read a book or think out some maneuvers Erwin has suggested. The small chalkboard you have in the one room is quite convenient. You don’t seem to use that room at all, so I put some of my papers in it. I hope you don’t mind.” Something about Levi setting up shop in my study made me feel warm too. He was making a permanent place in my house. That had to mean something right? If he left his papers there, then he would have to keep coming back to get them. If he needed to work away from the HQ, away from the cadet’s or Hange’s interruptions, he had a place here. I wonder if he realized that yet or if he was subconsciously making permanence. 

“That was the boy’s old room and Mr. Flynn’s office. The desk and books are all his, but he bought the chalkboard for Ben a long time ago. I only use the desk sometimes when I’m writing letters to a certain someone.” He took his hands out of his pockets to blow on them again, probably hiding the blush my words caused him. 

“Imagine someone looking down and seeing Captain Levi of the Survey Corps blushing.” He threw me a glare and lowered his hands to his sides. 

“The only reason I agreed to this walk is because it’s late at night. Don’t think I’ll walk with you during the daytime like this.” You pouted up to him, but it seemed to have no affect. You looked down at his hands, hanging by his side. The vow you made instantly popped in your head as you wanted to reach down and hold his hand. If he was being generous now, then maybe he would let me. I mean, this whole week he’s been nothing but physically suggestive, so if he shies away from holding my hand, I could use that to tease him back. He also gave me the scarf, so I could make something up about my hands being cold. Is holding hands too intimate for the Captain? And it wasn’t like holding him either, it was just hands. Why was I obsessing over this, I’ve held many peoples hands before? But he probably hasn’t. 

I decided to go for it.

I got closer to his side so our shoulders were brushing. When he didn’t move or react, that pushed me even more to reach down and grab his hand. I entwined our fingers quickly and his grip tightened to an almost, intolerable tightness. He even stopped walking to hold up our entwined hands to eye level. 

“W-what are you doing?” Still, he didn’t pull away from me. That was my fuel. 

“I’m holding my boyfriend’s hand at night since I can’t do it during the day. Do you not want to?” 

“I-I...uh - um.” He dropped our hands down, turning so I had no direct view to his face. My smile widened as his grip loosened and I faced no resistance. 

“Come on,” I pulled him a bit and he started walking again, his face still looking everywhere but at mine. His hand was warm, slim with long fingers that almost covered the complete back of my hand. They were rough too. I could feel the callouses from years and years of wielding knives and the ODM gear swords. It was a weird juxtaposition to my hands that were rough only because of physical ailment and making bread almost everyday. They were softer though, Levi having given me another refill of balm from the capital. 

Levi cleared his throat, “I think boyfriend is a bit… childish? I’m thirty.” I snickered, thinking back to our time on the meadow inside Wall Rose. It also made me replay the dream I once had, but I pushed that away. I would have that dream probably once a month, or other variations. Levi is eaten by a titan, Levi is taken away by the Royal Government, so on and so forth. I didn’t know why it kept replaying, but I would wake up in a cold sweat and bile rising to my throat. Since Levi was here, however, I haven’t had it yet.   

“We’ve talked about this. Once you give me a better alternative, then I’ll agree. Domestic partner is way too formal, and you’re not calling me your Comrade in Arms either. I think ‘my boyfriend’ is just fine. What do you call me with Erwin and Hange?” He just shrugged. 

“Your name. What else would you like? Hange likes to talk about you quite a bit, so I’ll have time to use it.” That made me a bit happy. Levi would talk about me during his normal day, or, rather, he’d probably listen to Hange say things and only answer them in his head. At least he would think about me. 

“Do I get a special title since I’m dating you now? Co-Captain? Co-Captain Flynn. That has a nice ring.” Levi huffed once, but I sensed it was him trying to hide a laugh. I was bouncing around him like a child, hands still connected. His face seemed amused at least and I could tell once he saw my smile, he softened up more. 

“No, you can’t be Co-Captain. What do you know about the military? You’re not even at cadet ranking.” 

“Fly on wires, have big knives, hit titan’s neck.” This time he couldn’t hide his smile as he shook his head, looking down again at our hands. 

“It takes the average cadet two years to become proficient with their ODM gear. Even more to master it. You make it sound much easier than it is. Do you want to try ODM gear?” I shook my free hand around wildly, making a face. 

“I’m fine on the ground.” 

“I could take you into the trees. You could just hold onto me while I flew around.” I shook my head this time and he sighed. It seemed at that point he just wanted to show off to me instead of actually teach. It was cute, but I was never going to get off the ground on that death machine, even if it meant I got to latch onto him. 

“I heard that the ODM gear is really heavy. You probably won’t be able to lift me and it.” It was his turn to shake his head at me. 

“You’re easily lighter than it. Combined it’s about fifty six kilograms.” My eyes probably were probably the size of the moon and it made me stop walking. 

“You mean you did all those flips and stuff with that on?!” He smirked at me, nodding, pulling on my hand to keep walking. This made me blush a little, but I followed, realizing I led us on the way back home. It was probably a few more minutes till we reached the bakery. 

“That’s why your shoulders are so broad! You have to carry that around all day.” I could hear his breath catch in his throat. So much for being bold and pulling me along with him. 

“Complimenting me won’t get me in your bed, Eva.” I mimicked his voice and turned my face away from him. 

“Just take the compliment, hm.” I would’ve crossed my arms if my hand wasn’t in his, but I wasn’t going to unclasp them because then he probably wouldn’t let me hold his hand again. We walked for a bit more in silence as I tried to keep up my act, but I was quickly getting annoyed. Levi was fine if I didn’t talk to him, and ignoring him didn’t do anything. 

“Why are you so adamant that I sleep in your bed? I don’t even sleep, it would be annoying for you to wake up when I get up. I know you already wake up because of the noise I make.” I was shocked that he asked me that. It sounded like something he would just keep in his head and try to answer it. It made me feel a bit better that he was making an effort to understand. I could tell by the tone of his voice it was a serious question. 

“It’s just nice to fall asleep having someone next to you. Sometimes you can cuddle too, but I don’t think you’d do that, and who knows, maybe when you sleep with me you won’t wake up. I have a calming effect on you, remember?” I was referring to all the times he’s laid his head on my lap. While we haven’t had such close contact like the night before he left, he still would lay his head in my lap to read a book or look over some papers. At first, it would shock me when he initiated, but it also made my heart burst. Soon, even if it was only over the last three days, it became common practice. I would sit down on the couch after dinner or coming back from the bakery if I had nothing to attend to and he would come to lay his head down on my lap, and sometimes he would read the book out loud or ask me for my opinion. 

“Have you done it with other people?” Oh. His tone changed when he asked that question. Or maybe he was gauging how comfortable it would be for me.

“Yes, I have.” 

“Jonas?” Hearing his name out of Levi’s mouth hurt a bit. It hadn’t even been a week since we fought, and I haven’t seen him since. He’d sent another delivery driver and since there was no festival, there was no way to see him. I asked Ben in passing, but he just shrugged. After he came home from the bakery, Jonas was gone. He does not meddle in his kids' lives enough to keep tabs on them. I sighed before answering. 

“Yes, with him. It’s just sleeping though.” He grunted and I noticed he gripped my hand a little tighter. 

“Did it happen when I was gone?” Was he… jealous? This was new. 

“Yes, it did. I had… Well, I have nightmares sometimes. Don’t worry though, after we started dating, I’d kick him out after he calmed me down. Even when we were little, he would sleep next to me so I wouldn’t wake up scared and alone. It just turned into a habit.” I scratched the back of my head, seeing his point of view as well as Jonas’s. That was another thing I should’ve stopped when I found out he liked me, but I was selfish and needed the emotional support sometimes. 

“You haven’t had a nightmare since I’ve been here. I would know.” I could see the bakery up ahead of me, the sign blowing in the wind. 

“You’re right, I haven’t.” He nodded. 

“If I hear you having a nightmare, I’ll sleep with you then.” I hummed in agreement, knowing that even that was a hard decision for him to make. Finally reaching the stairs, I went up one before Levi pulled me to stop. He just stood at the edge of the stairs, staring up at me while holding on to my hand. 

“I apologize for not knowing how to do any of this.” My eyes softened down at him and turned to face him straight on. 

“Don’t apologize. I know you haven’t ever had feelings like this before. It makes sense that you don’t know how to interpret them or interpret mine.” He shook his head slowly. 

“No, it’s not an excuse. I should learn, I just… I just don’t know about certain things.” I put my hand on his cheek, giving him a reassuring smile. 

“Thank you for sharing this emotion with me, though. That’s all I ask for. Don’t hide things you don’t need to from me.” He grumbled, shifting down to look at the stairs. There was no blush, but I could tell what I said had an effect. There was something he wanted to tell me, but he was still uncomfortable saying it outloud. I wondered who made him this way in the Underground. I was the same way when Mr. Flynn found me, but he made me find happiness. He let me trust humans again. I would have to do the same to Levi.  

“The reason… well, one of the reasons.” He gripped my hand harder, gritting his teeth. It hurt me to see this physically hurt him. 

“You don’t need to explain it to me, Levi. If it’s too hard to-” He took one step up on the same stair as me, making sure he was close as he could be. He took my other hand too, closing his eyes and clenching his jaw. 

“I owe you an explanation. Even if I feel so weak telling you things like this, I need to tell you. I promised to tell you.” His eyes opened and the emotion was back again. The one when I gave him the tea set and when I held him that night on the couch. My heart sped up as the atmosphere around us morphed into a cloud of that emotion. 

“When I slept in other’s beds, it was only to leave before they could wake up. The few that I’ve ever been in, it was only for a fast physical relief. So when you invite me to sleep in your bed, I think only of those moments. I only think of that connotation. When you ask me to sleep with you, I can only picture the end result of a regretful night in the Underground. I don’t want that with you. I respect you more and I actually feel something for you. I can’t just be so casually physical with you, it holds more weight now. Even when saying that, I don’t know how to do that. I don’t know how to not be casually physical with you when that’s all I know. So I’m cautious. I stop myself from doing certain things because I feel I’ll end up with the same result from not knowing better. I beat myself up inside after I do things like that because I don’t want to do that to you.” Those words almost took my breath away. No man I’ve been with has given me such consideration. Has put such value on me. It was like I had previously thought. The only way he knows how to express is physically, so when the line blurs, he doesn’t know what to do. 

“Is that why you haven’t kissed me back yet?” This time he did flush a bit, turning his head to the side. Yet, he kept on being vulnerable which made me want to take him in my arms and thank him. I knew how hard this all was for him, but at the same time, I didn’t. How many years has he gone without meaningful interaction with someone else?

“Yes, it is. I’ve never - it’s never been emotionally charged for me. I’m scared that if I kiss you, it will turn out like the rest. I’ve never been kissed the way you kissed me in the café. What if I can’t do it?” I could see true worry in his eyes. He was like a child in front of me, deflating at each word. He was afraid of failing. Afraid of losing. That’s why he would always ask me before he did something. He was afraid of doing something wrong and resulting in the same harsh end he’s faced over and over again. I gripped his hands, moving my head so I could see his face completely. He wanted to hide from me, but I wasn’t going to let him. 

“This isn’t going to be like before, Levi. This isn’t the Underground. You’re here with me, someone who’s stuck with you for almost a whole year. I’m not like the others you’ve been with either. You know that. And you’re - you’re not like them, Levi. You’ve held me. You’ve shown me emotion. You’ve been vulnerable with me. This happened to me too. It took me so long to realize that people up here weren’t going to hurt me like they do down there. People love up here. People want to live up here. People won’t leave you here. I won’t leave you like they have.” He grabbed me into a hug, this time without asking. It was how his body was manifesting whatever emotion I was making him feel. Maybe he did this to make me stop talking, who knows. He buried his face in my neck, one hand in my hair, the other still holding my hand. 

“You’re not like them either,” he whispered into my neck, “You’re nothing like them. But one day, I might leave you forever.” I knew what he meant. One day, he might die and I’ll be alone. Still, I stand by what I told Erwin. He isn’t going to die. He’s Levi. 

“I told you, don’t care.” He stood up, his hands staying where they were. His eyes were wide still, probably at the tone I gave him. I’ve had to tell him at least ten different times that I didn’t care about the possibility of him dying because I knew he wouldn’t. When I told him then, it was a bit harsh, but it’s what he needed to hear. I don’t care if there’s that possibility, I’m going to choose to live without fear. I tried to make sure he saw that in my eyes.

“The titans might come into Trost, and I’ll die. What then?” He gripped me harder shaking his head. 

“No, I’ll save you before then. You’ll be the first one I save if that happens.” I huffed once in laughter, just lightly. I knew he was being serious and speaking the truth. If Trost somehow was breached by titans, he would knock down that door and take me up with him. That thought was at least a little comforting. 

“I’ll save you, too. Somehow.” He leaned forward, looking up at my eyes as he did. His grip was still hard on my hand and in my hair so I wouldn’t move away. There was no chance of me moving away from him. 

“I’m going to kiss you.” His breath wafted over my lips and I didn’t say anything. I just nodded to him, tilting my head the other way to give him some form of consent. He still couldn’t shake the habit of telling me, but I’d let it go for now. 

When his lips locked with mine, finally on their own accord, I melted my body forward with his, trying to get as close as possible. The cold air around us seemed nonexistent as we both heated up in the cold. It started as one kiss, then another, then another. His lips were soft and he still tasted like the mint tea he was sipping on before I forced him to take a walk. 

My stomach was twisting, I couldn’t think straight, and I had to stop myself from going on my tiptoes with the amount of passion he had put in the kiss. He was so worried about not being about to put in emotion after years of blanks, but here he was, kissing the life out of me. He was the one who would initiate another kiss and then another, pulling me close to his body feeling every curve. He was trying to show me all the emotion I’d given him. It was mind-numbing to think he was holding back this much. I was trying to follow him, not trying to get caught up and even more out of breath, but with no avail. No one had made me feel this way while their lips were on mine. How did I go through life never having kissed Levi? I didn’t want it to end, and I lifted my other hand up to his cheek, holding him there.  

When my tongue glanced over his bottom lip, he lost his balance at that action, falling back and catching both of us with one hand on the stair railing. He pulled back and I was lightheaded, trying to catch my breath. He did the same, now not being able to look me in the eyes while his shoulders moved up and down in time with his deep breaths. They were almost gasps. We both had to catch our breath, the cold air coming back to fill our burning lungs. How badly did I want to reach down and do that again? It was going to be so addicting kissing him. Kissing him. I just kissed him. No, he just kissed me. Maybe nine or ten times. Each with blazing emotion that was still making me unable to speak. Just him kissing me was enough to make me dumb. It was dangerous to think about what he could do that would completely ruin me. I would welcome it so easily after experiencing this. It was just the tip of the iceberg. 

“I-” I stopped him from saying anything. Was he going to apologize? Say something more self-degrading. I didn’t know and I didn’t care. 

“I know, Levi,” I said, sounding almost breathless. Whatever it was, I seemed to satisfy it and he gripped my hand harder.

“L-let’s go up.”

-

“Goodnight then, yeah?” I stared at him from my doorway as he put the book down on his stomach to look back at me. This had to be the twentieth book he’d read while he was here. Soon, I’d have to buy him more because he’d have read every single one in my bookshelf.

“It’s so early for you to sleep though. The past week you went to bed always after three.” I rolled my eyes as him. He was the reason for that and he knew it. He was probably upset that I was sleeping this early, but I was tired.

“Well, last week someone learned how to kiss with their tongue and wanted to perfect the technique till three each night,” His face went beat red, and he stuttered again, picking up the book to read it so he didn’t have to respond, “Mhm, that’s what I thought.” 

“Go to bed.” I crossed your arms over my chest looking at my empty bed. 

“Not going to join me?” He scoffed, always being annoyed that I asked him. I’d always pull away from his lips, leaving him annoyed because he “wasn’t done practicing yet” and ask that question. He was probably tired of hearing it even though he made his intentions clear. Only if I need it because of a nightmare; those were his rules. But, with him here, I knew I would never have a nightmare. 

“Dream about something scary and I will.” I pouted, but he refused to look at me, knowing I’d say something to further incriminate his actions over the past week. Once he kissed me, it seemed to open a floodgate of need. We’d do the same routine as before, I’d come back from making tomorrow’s loaves, he’d find a book and lay his head on my lap, but then suddenly he’d be pushing me against the couch, one hand next to my head and the other holding my cheek exploring some new technique I’d told him off hand. It was comically methodic, matching the same energy as practicing titan maneuvers. Maybe that’s how he built the courage for himself to do it, aligning it to a common day occurrence. Hey, practice makes perfect, and he was a perfectionist. I didn’t complain.

Yet, he never did anything but kiss me. He’d pull back once he was done practicing or if he decided it was getting too far, ask for a review, make a game plan for tomorrow, and then see it was pretty much the time I’d go to bed. It would make me laugh every time. Tonight was the night before year-end, so I had orders upon orders to fill and no time for Levi to get in some practice. That’s why he commented on how early it was for me to sleep, but he’d have to deal with it. Imagine if anyone saw him like this, he’d be mortified. It made me smug that he was like this just for me. 

I turned around to go to bed, making sure the door was cracked only a little bit. 

“Goodnight Eva,” he mumbled behind the door and I smiled before getting into bed. Tomorrow was going to be a very long day, but at least I had a guaranteed stress relieving session after… even if it left me with some pent up energy… and even if he was leaving in another day or two. I closed my eyes not thinking about it, falling asleep to Levi turning the pages of his book every so often. 

Yet, my sound sleep was interrupted sometime later. I didn’t know what time it was, but I did know that all the candles and lamps in your house were off. That means Levi wasn’t in the study, nor in the kitchen. Maybe I’d only been asleep for an hour and he had yet to wake up from a nap. 

I sat up in my bed, looking around the dark room. Why did I wake up? I shrugged and decided to go get some water or bother Levi if he was awake. Perhaps not having a practice session to wear me out before bed caused this. I threw the covers off of me, feet putting on slippers so I didn’t touch the cold floor. 

Then I heard it. A whimper. It was low and came from the other side of the door. My eyes widened and I grabbed the edge of the door to open it quickly. It took time for my eyes to adjust to the moonlight filtering through the two windows, but it shined right on Levi’s sleeping figure. 

I first saw how deep his eyebrows were creased, and then saw him fisting his shirt. He was asleep, that was for sure, but he was restless. His head was moving every so often and I saw his jaw grit more than once. Then the whimper came again. It made me stop taking steps into the living room to listen closely. I’d never heard that sound come from him ever. 

“N-no.” He grabbed his shirt again, hard, and I saw the fabric twist completely. Then, the noises came. They sounded like noises of struggle, of soft screams at something. He was having a nightmare. My eyes widened and I didn’t know what to do. Do I go and wake him up? I had to. He needed to wake up from whatever he was dreaming of. That was what Jonas did to me. Still, I was worried what would happen if I did. Would he be upset that I saw him like this? 

I approached him, his body softly flailing around as those noises still kept coming. I had to wake him up, I couldn’t see him like this. Still, I stood a foot away from him, trying not to get hit. 

“Levi..? Levi..? Levi!” It didn’t work. He was still thrashing around, sweat falling down his face. It broke my heart to see him like that. Hours previous he was calm, sitting on the couch and reading a book I’d given him about tea. Now, that book was thrown halfway across the room and he looked helpless under this nightmare’s grasp. I had to go in, no matter if he hit me. I couldn’t stand watching him suffer like this. 

I knelt down and grabbed the hand that had his shirt in a death grip. Quickly, it grabbed my wrist, thinking it was some type of invader. Ow, ow, ow, it hurt so much. This was his true strength and my hesitations about waking him up came true. 

“Levi!” I tried to wave that hand, hoping the movement would wake him up, but I couldn’t even move under his harsh grasp. I hoped that his other hand was too busy grabbing the life out of the couch to attack me too. I’d probably have to hit him to wake him up, but that might just escalate the situation. 

“Levi, wake up!” I was yelling at him now, but with no avail. Tears were springing in the corner of my eyes at the pain of being grabbed like that, and soon enough my other hand was hitting his chest in a last resort.

“Levi,” hit, “wake,” hit, “up! Ow, ow, ow, ow!” Why wasn’t he waking up? Oh my gods. I reached up to his face, having to stretch, and slapped him once. It wasn’t hard, but it had to be enough to wake him up. When I pulled back my hand, I gasped feeling the wetness. He was crying. I had to wake him up now. He was in pain. He was hurting. 

“Levi, wake up! Please!” Finally, I used my foot to reach up and kick his side. This made him cough hard, interrupting his whines. I said a polite sorry, but I needed to get my hand out of his grip before he broke my wrist. 

“Levi! It’s me! Eva!” I said through my teeth, not being able to take the pain anymore. I let out a loud groan when he finally released me, falling back to the floor, nursing my wrist with my other hand. I could tell there would be bruises around it tomorrow. Great, on the day I needed my hands the most, I decided to try and get Humanity’s Strongest up from a nightmare. That wasn’t smart at all.

“Eva,” he mumbled, looking at me withering on the floor. He brought a hand to his face, feeling the remains of tears, and then it all clicked. His eyes widened.

“Oh my fuckin-” 

“Ice pack please,” I groaned and he shot up from the coach, running to the icebox to make a bag. Honestly, now that I was sitting here for a few, it didn’t hurt as much, but it was still throbbing. I was more worried about him than my wrist at the moment, but he seemed to completely forget that he was having a night terror seconds previous. 

When he came back over, he grabbed me off the floor, lifting me up on the couch. I didn’t move against him and he grabbed my wrist lightly, making me wince. His eyes had changed now. There was horror, but for the situation in front of him. What he had just done when he was sleeping weighted heavy on him, no doubt. I had to reassure him. 

“Levi, it’s okay. You were-” 

“It’s not okay!” He raised his voice, holding the box of frozen butter to my wrist. I winced more at that than the ice and he noticed. This made him try to calm back down for my own sake.

“Levi, you were having a nightmare. I just tried to wake you up. You didn’t know what you were doing, you were asleep.” Still, he put his head in my lap, hand gripping his leg hard. With every apology, he hit his leg harder.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.” He whispered it over and over again and it made me want to throw up. He was in so much pain and here he was apologizing for it. I wouldn’t take it. I couldn’t take the fact that he wasn’t only apologizing to me, but still trying to get out of his nightmare. He woke up to a nightmare because of me.

“Levi, stop!” It was harsh, but it got him to stop saying it. When he sat up to look at me, his jaw and hand were still clenched. He was trying to calm down, but his eyes were still wild like before. He was eating himself up inside. 

“I. Hurt. You.” My eyes softened and I lifted my good hand up to touch his cheek. He shied away from it, which made me frown even more. I didn’t care about my damn wrist. 

“What were you dreaming about?” I made sure my voice was softer than before, trying to redirect him. He shook his head. 

“Not important. Your wrist-” I grabbed at his cheek, trying to get him to stop talking. It was the cheek I slapped. 

“Levi, you were crying!” It made him look down at your hand laying on the block of butter. I knew he knew he was crying. I’d never seen him cry before, so it was concerning. It hurt too. I was seeing him in so much pain, but now he felt that he had to hide it from me. I couldn’t do anything to help him even thought I wanted to. I wanted so bad for him to cry in front of me and release whatever he was feeling, but that probably would never happen. Levi would never cry in front of anyone.

“I… I d-don’t want to talk - talk about it. Please.” It was a plea and it hit me deep down. I stopped pressing him. He needed to be comforted. I knew that much. I could do that much.

“Let me hold you?” He took the butter, now at room temperature, and stood up to get away from the question and to get another cold thing. I wasn’t going to let him run away from this. 

“Levi, you said you would lay with me if I had a nightmare. The same applies to you.” He stared at me from the opening in the kitchen, his eyes having no emotion in them anymore. He hid everything deeper and deeper so I couldn’t point anything out.

“No.” You stood up quickly, but Levi was there to make me sit down again with a bag of corn, “No, sit.” 

“If I listen to you, you have to listen to me.” He sighed and pushed me back down to nurse my wrist. 

“The difference is I’m not going back to sleep.” The dark circles under his eyes became more evident to me after that. How much sleep had he lost to nightmares? 

“Are nightmares the reason you don’t sleep much?” I put two fingers under his chin, directing him to look at me again. He didn’t want to, but he wasn’t going to refuse me. 

“Most of the time, yes,” he whispered and that made tears well in my eyes again. Sadly, that seemed to make him feel worse, “Hey, stop. Don’t cry for me. It’s not worth it, okay? They usually aren’t this bad, yeah? Eva, it’s okay. I’m okay.” It was funny he was trying to reassure me when he was the one who needed it the most. He was pushing down everything to make me feel okay. 

“I don’t care. Rules are rules,” I rubbed the tears away with my hand, “If you have nightmares, you had to sleep with me. What’s the difference between laying on the couch and laying in my bed with me?” He turned my wrist so he could ice the other side. 

“There’s a difference to me. I don’t deserve to be in your bed when I hurt you like this.” His thumb ran over the red, splotchy marks on my wrist, and I had to pull him out of his wallowing. Somehow. 

“Then here. I’ll lay here with you on the couch.” He shook his head again.

“No, you go sleep in your bed. I’m up now, for good. There’s only a few hours till sunrise.” I ripped my wrist out of his grasp, hissing at the pain it left me. He only seemed to care about the pain I caused myself and he glared at me for doing something stupid like that. Still, I was going to force him for his own good.

“I’m going to sit here until you lay down with me and that’s final, Levi.” He groaned, and I crossed my arms, careful of my wrist, showing him I was serious. If this was any other situation, he would probably have laughed at me, but he just let out a long sigh. 

“Fine,” it was a whisper of defeat, and I would usually smile, but this time I laid my head in his chest. He got the cue and wrapped his arms around me, leaning back so that his head was laying on a pillow. My body was on top of his, legs intertwined at the other end of the couch. If this were any other situation, I would be blushing, my heart beating faster, but I was here to calm him. Regardless of who was holding who, I needed to make sure that he was okay. I put my ear to his chest, listening to the sound of his heartbeat. It was still beating fast and I didn’t know if that was because of our position or the adrenaline from earlier. Either way, I reached a hand up to pay with his hair like he liked, trying to get the same reaction out of his that I do when he lays in my lap. He did the same, running his fingers in my still-damp hair from showering. His breath started slowing down too and when I looked up at him, his eyes were closed, so I did the same, matching my breath with his. We laid like this for a few minutes, just taking in the position we had with the other. It was our first time like this, but the pain, physical and mental, overshadowed any type of blushing reserve we would usually have.

“I dreamt about the time my friends were eaten by Titans, but this time you were there too, in that stupid Scout uniform I made you wear.” I opened my eyes at his words. His tone was much calmer, even if he was hiding everything, and I hoped that I was the one who made him feel more at ease. He told me what he dreamt about, and that was all I could ask.

“You said I’d make a good Scout.” He laughed slowly, and I felt the vibrations from his chest. It calmed me down.

“I wanted to say that you looked cute.” It was my turn to blush at his words, so I buried my face into his chest more, taking in his scent. It remained unchanged. Mint, lemon, and cedar

“Do you want me to wear it again?” He grabbed my waist, pulling me up so that our chests’ matched and my face could be buried in his neck. I sat up on my elbows to look his in the eyes, wondering why he pulled me closer.

“No, I think you look fine in what you wear normally.” I rested my head in one of my hands, still looking down at him. Even if he was acting calm, he looked like shit. The tears had dried, but his eyes were still red and the dark circles were now more prominent. The dream hurt him, but he wouldn’t tell me that. He never wanted me to see him broken like that. 

“When you come back from your expedition, can you bring me some more of those button ups? They’re really nice quality.” My free hand, the hurt one, traced circles in his cheek. There was still no emotion in his eyes as he looked up at me. That was the number one tell that he wasn’t okay. He was hiding. 

“No, I can’t steal military issued clothing for you. Besides, we’re already short.” I pouted and, again, there was no emotion or little annoyed expression. He wasn’t giving me anything to work with, and I was getting too tired to yell at him more. He knew that, that’s why he kept talking about random things. 

“What am I going to have when you’re gone for those three months?” He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath, resting his hands on my waist. 

“Maybe I’ll be nice to you and leave a few of my military issued shirts in your dresser.” I smiled down at him and finally laid down, my head on his shoulder. Laying with him was as amazing as I expected, if only it wasn’t under such circumstances. He was warm and comfortable, and the thumbs drawing circles in my waist made it easy for you to relax into him. 

“That would be nice of you, Captain. Maybe I’ll be nice to you and leave a few bags of peppermint tea in your duffle bag before you leave.” He moved his hand up to my hair again, running his fingers through it. I was glad I took the time to brush it before bed. 

“That would be nice of you, Co-Captain. Now go to sleep, you have a lot of work to do in the morning.” I hummed, doing just that, on your new, warm, comfortable, muscular bed. How was I ever going to fall asleep on something different now?

Chapter Thirteen→

Chapter Masterlist

xx Sorry for the long wait! I’ve been trying to catch up with my requests and school work! 

[ddmilo]

Wholesome MC and Luke Headcanons !!

Content: GN! MC and Luke

Featuring MC as an older sibling/parental figure to Luke!

Lately, I’ve been obsessed w/ the idea of MC being a figure that Luke looks up to so...

Here is my MC and Luke brainrot!!

First things first, he hangs out with you ALOT. Like, alot alot. So much so that it’s a bit tiring i mean-- that the brothers start to get jealous w/ how much he’s around you. Lucifer starts to bully him a bit more when he’s around you but you are there to stand up for him and protect him from mean old Lucifer.

Also there to stand up to demons that pick on both him and you which doesn’t go as well as Lucifer because those demons really don’t care about your opinion (not that Lucifer cares alot either but at least he stops in a timely manner)

Won’t ask you himself, but he’ll beg Simeon to invite you somewhere out with them. Like out to a restaurant or something.

If he sneezes and you don’t bless him, he’ll assume you’re a little busy, wait a bit, and then fake sneeze a bit louder than the first one. If you still haven’t blessed him after that, he’ll start to get a little angry. He’ll kinda just...stare...at you?? Like, he’ll just...

yeah....

If you ask him what’s wrong he’ll come right out and say that you didn’t bless him. At first you’re confused. Bless him? What is he talking about?? So you ask him:

“Bless...you?”

“Thank you.”

And then it clicks that he probably sneezed at that’s what he was talking about. He can’t stay mad at you for long and everythings fine after that.

It doesn’t happen often but if he makes you mad he’ll try anything and everything to make it up to you (to be honest though, it really makes it worse. If you’re super angry at him he’ll know to just avoid you.

 One time. he broke one of your things on accident and you didn’t talk to him the whole school day. After school ended, as he was walking back to Purgatory Hall, he noticed you standing beside his room. Maybe you wanted to reconcile; maybe you weren’t mad at him anymore! 

Then he noticed how you were blocking entrance to his room. And how you were standing. And how you had a familiar mischevious look on your face-

Oh no.

Don’t do it

No

No MC

NO-

Luke didn’t have enough time to drop his bags and run as you ran toward him and scooped him up at full speed. You were running around the House of Lamentation and laughing maniacally as he clung onto you for dear life.

Good news:

At least you weren’t mad at him anymore.

Phew, the days events really tired you out!

Glad it’s nightime. Now you can just relax and sleep peacefully until the next days chaotic adventures.

...

.......

Or so you thought.

 You wake up to a knock on you’re door in the middle of the night. You disregard it as one of the brothers trying to get your attention. The knocks get increasingly louder to the point where you really couldn’t take it anymore.

So you open the door and look up, expecting to see one of the brothers towering over you. Nothing. You stand there a bit confused until you hear a voice and look down.

“Luke? I- uh, what’re you doing here?”

“Can I sleep in your room tonight? Just this once?”

Major irony there-

“Oh-uhm sure, of course!”

You take a pillow and small blanket from your bed and you tell Luke that he can sleep on your bed, you’ll just sleep on the couch. He thanks you and you set up your new couch-bed for the night. As you feel your eyes close....

“Um...MC?”

“Yeah?”

“Can you.. sleep beside me?”

“What?”

“On the floor I mean.”

“Oh, sure.”

Poor boy sure must be lonely in Purgatory Hall-

“Wait, Luke, why’d you come all the way over here when you could’ve just went to Simeon or even Solomon?”

....

“Because.”

Typical 11 year old response.

After that, he started coming to your room a little more, like once every month or so.

Now, it’s like once every week and everytime you hear a little knock on your door, you know immediately that you’ve been evicted out of your bed.

Also, he is the kind of sleeper that literally shoves things off of the bed while he’s tossing and turning.

All of your blankets and comforters are on the floor.

 And they somehow manage to land on you??

 You are suffocating under your own comforters while he’s sprawled on your bed.

This was going to be the end, but then I thought:

What would he do if he saw one of the brothers in your bed?

And oh lordie....

If you didn’t answer the door the third time he knocked, then he would assume you’re in a really deep sleep and he’ll actually just let himself in with the emergency key.

Luke opens the door and walks into your room slowly, as to not startle you too badly.

“Hey...MC....”

“Mcccc... is it okay if I-”

He sees one of the brothers in your bed.

Sleeping with you.

With their arm around you.

He freezes and just stares. His fists are balled up and he is physically trembling with anger. And he just stands there and stares and doesn’t do anything.

Whatever warming up he had with that brother was OUT the window.

He is FURIOUS.

Extra anger points if it’s Lucifer.

We all know Lucifer sleeps with one eye open.

So he’ll know Luke is there and he’ll shift ever so much to put his other arm around you and put his face in the crook of your neck. We all know he’s smirking. Luke wants to scream because he knows he’s doing it on purpose but can’t do anything about it.

At this point Lukes knuckles are white and his face is red and there are tears stinging his eyes.

So he just lets out a little huff and then quietly goes out of your room.

He wants to slam the door behind him, but he doesn’t want to wake you or anyone else up, so he just resorts to closing it softly and then doing a little angry dance outside of your room.

The next day, if you try to talk to him he will full on ignore you.

MC: “Hey Luke, did I do something wrong..?”

Luke: “Simeon, do you feel that gust of wind blowing? Kind of annoying huh.”

MC: “Oh come on Luke, first off that’s so petty and second off we’re inside. What wind is blowing??”

Luke: “The air vents must be turned up really high today right, Simeon?”

MC: “Wow, very mature...”

Simeon: “Well, he is ten. What else did you expect?”

Luke: “I’m eleven, for one. And also, who are you talking to?”

MC: “I’m talking to you, Luke”

Luke: “I’m not talking to you.”

MC: “You are now.”

Luke: “These vent currents sure are something, huh Simeon?”

MC: “I-...Oh well...since you’re so intent on ignoring me, I guess I’ll just eat these two slices of cake that Barbatos made by myself......”

Coincidentally, he stopped ignoring you after that.

This doesn’t mean he forgives you though.

Well a bit... Okay he mostly forgives you but he’s still a little mad.

Also, he’s staring daggers at the brothers anytime they try to come near you.

Angry Luke is like having your own personal guard chihuahua that isn’t that intimidating and he can’t actually do anything in regards of sending people away, so he’ll just drag you off somewhere else.

Give him a break he’s doing his best,,,

Sibling MC hhngnng Sorry this was so long,,, I haven’t really gotten that far into the story but I really like the game so far! Anyways, I hope you enjoyed my little headcanons,,!

-ddmilo

[taeken-my-heart]

Revenant Finale

Summary: You’d always been told that when you died that you’d walk into the light towards Heaven. Only problem is, you died and the light never showed up. Now you’re attached to a handsome but grumpy and sleep deprived medical student and neither one of you knows what to do to get you to finally cross over.

Rating: PG15

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader

Genre: Fluff, angst, Ghost!au, MedicalStudent!Namjoon

Word Count: 6538

Warnings: Mentions of a seizure, though nothing is graphically described.

.

.

The majority of the next two weeks went by mostly uneventfully. You spent the larger part of your time split between watching Namjoon work at the hospital or in class. Sometimes, when your family could spare an hour, you’d spend time with them in your room; listening as they spoke to your comatose body.

Cora was often with your mom when she came to visit, touching everything in your room that interested her before coming back to stand at your bedside. On occasion, she’d stay in daycare and you’d get your mom to yourself. She told you about everything going on in the world and it was a bizarre mixture of comfort and anguish. Things were changing without you while you laid in that bed waiting to wake up. Time truly waited for no one. It was strange to think that one moment you were here and the next you were gone and the majority of the world wouldn’t change even a little because of it.

On this particular morning, your family had yet to come see you. You lounged on the couch across the room from where Namjoon was taking the vitals of your body and watched him work. You felt suddenly sleepy, like a dream was dragging you in and you felt your body clench tight before slumping over on the couch. The noise of the room, a blaring alarm, it all sunk into clouds of nothing.

Opening your eyes, the ceiling of your hospital room quickly came back into focus and you took a deep breath. For the first time in what felt like forever, you could feel something more than just gentle pressure. Your whole body felt like it had been tensed for hours; you were sore and out of breath and you watched zombie like as Namjoon quickly exited the room.

The room was filled with nurses, Dr. Bang standing over your body and you watched as everyone took a collective sigh of relief. What had happened? Why did everything feel so sore and where had Namjoon gone?

There was a tingle that spread through your whole body, similar to when your foot falls asleep and you winced, flexing your fingers as they stung. When the pain had subsided and you’d caught your breath, you stood from the chair to look for Namjoon. As you stepped into the hallway you suddenly found yourself standing in the disabled bathroom. Frowning, you looked down to find Namjoon huddled in the corner, face buried in his folded arms. His shoulders shook and you paused in surprise.

“Are you OK?” You asked softly.

Namjoon jumped, gaze darting up to you. His eyes were red rimmed and puffy and your heart ached for him. You went to sit beside him, wishing more than anything that you could wipe the tears from his face.

“I should be the one asking you that.” He groaned, wiping at his nose with the back of his hand. “I’m so sorry. I just- I don’t know why you’re attached to me, I don’t know how to help you.” His bottom lip quivered as he stared down at his shoes, tucked underneath him on the cold linoleum floor.

“I want so badly to help,” he continued, looking back at you, “I want to be able to make things better, but I don’t know what I’m doing and that…that was terrifying. I thought that I’d lost you.” He reached his hand forward to stroke against your cheek and for a moment you nearly jumped at the contact.

It felt so real, like you were actually sitting in front of him, two normal people, and you could feel everything as though you weren’t somewhere floating between life and death. It was euphoric.

He seemed to be having the same thoughts as he watched, transfixed, as his thumb stroked across your cheek and down towards your mouth. “We, I mean.” He whispered, “I thought we’d lost you.”

“What happened?” You asked and he looked at you in confusion.

“You don’t remember? You were staring right at me.” When you shook your head no, he continued. “You had a seizure. I called a code blue and everything just happened so fast. It looked like both your body and you were having a seizure. It was awful. I was so scared. I really don’t know how I’m supposed to help you.” He repeated.

“It’s ok.” You said softly, leaning into the contact of his hand on your face. You craved the affection, the way his thumb lit nerve endings across your face. It was electric; he was electric. “Just having someone who can see me…someone who knows I’m still around and is willing to fight to get me back. You have no idea how much that means to me.”

“I wish I could do more.” He bemoaned and you smiled. “I want to make it all better.”

“You’re going to make such an excellent doctor.” You sighed, reaching up to grab his hand. “I’m glad you’re taking care of me; I couldn’t ask for anyone better.”

Namjoon flushed, dropping his hand into his lap but you kept your fingers tangled with his, squeezing gently. You wondered if he could feel you as strongly as you could feel him. “Not even Hoseok?” He teased.

You could see the apprehension in his gaze as he asked it and you grinned, shaking your head. “Nope, not even Hoseok. Only you.”

You reached out to wipe the tears from his face, watching in amazement as they disappeared with the swipe of your fingers. You wondered what was going on with your body right now; why you were suddenly so present.

Standing, you motioned for Namjoon to stand up as well. He stood, going to splash some water on his face before grabbing a paper towel to dry off. “Let’s get you back to work.” You hummed, moving towards the door. “Somehow, things will all work out. Don’t you think?”

He moved towards you, staring down into your face, eyes still slightly red but dimples on display as he smiled. “They better.”

.

.

Around three in the afternoon, your family came. Cora was dressed in the cute yellow dress you remembered agonizing over. It was too expensive but you wanted her to have something that made her feel like a princess. In the end, your mom had paid for it and then it had taken 3 days to convince Cora to take it off after trying it on so you could wash it.

“We rushed over as soon as we were able.” Your mom said and you watched as her eyes filled with tears, “she had a seizure? What happened?”

“We’re not really sure at this point in time,” Dr. Bang started, “it’s not typical for someone to have a seizure this far along into their recovery. We’re doing more tests to make sure everything is functioning properly; with special attention to her brain. So far, though, she seems to have actually improved. Every test we’ve run has come back very positive. It’s extremely encouraging.”

Your mother flopped in the chair beside your bed, relief washing over her features and you watched as your brother Luke went to go squeeze her shoulder. Your dad and Ethan both stood with Dr. Bang as he gave more information, but your attention was captured by Cora as she attempted to climb on your bed.

You grinned as your mother fussed over her, pulling her back into her lap while Cora pouted. Normally, your daughter was fairly fussy with what she wanted. It seemed like you being here in this bed had subdued her somehow. You missed your feisty girl.

They spent the afternoon fussing over your hair, straightening your bedding and putting new, fluffed pillows under your head. You smiled at the attention, their love warming you from the inside out.

You couldn’t wait to give them all hugs again.

.

.

The apartment was quiet once more. Namjoon flipped on the lights in the hallway, illuminating it in low florescence as he slowly removed his shoes. He was weary this evening, you could almost see his thoughts racing through his mind as he leaned against the wall, kicking his final shoe into the shoe bin by the door.

He stood, sluggish, and moved towards the living room to sit on the couch. “I guess I broke a cardinal rule today.” He sighed. You came to sit beside him, brows furrowed in your confusion.

“What rules?”

“The unwritten one that says to not get too attached to your patients.” He looked over at you with a sad smile. You felt your chest clench but you weren’t sure if it was good or bad. Admitting to being attached sounded nice…but he said it like it was a bad thing. “I thought we were gonna lose you today and I felt like I was losing a piece of myself with you.” He admitted.

“Is that a bad thing?” You asked carefully.

His head dropped onto the back of the couch, staring up at the ceiling. “I guess it depends on how you choose to see it. It’s got its good and its bad. I can’t fall apart every time I lose someone as a doctor, and it’s bound to happen. I know it sounds callous to people on the outside, but you have to separate yourself from the tragedy somehow or it will chew you up and spit you out.”

“You haven’t lost me, though.” You pointed out softly and his answering smile was grim.

“But have I ever really had you?” You couldn’t say anything to that because the truth is, you didn’t really know the answer. “At first, we thought you were dead. Then we find out you’re actually in a coma, which could be good or bad depending on if you wake up. If you do wake up, will you even remember me? All this? We’re banking on a whole lot of what ifs.”

You paused, rubbing your lips together before finally releasing your thoughts. “You sound as though you’re thinking of something more beyond me just waking up and being with my family again.”

He looked over at you, eyes scanning the planes of your face before speaking. “Did I read things wrong?” He whispered. “I thought there was potential for something more…between us. I’m sorry.”

You shook your head. “No, you didn’t read it wrong.” You leaned your head against his shoulder, burrowing into his neck. You could smell his cologne, sharp and woodsy and you inhaled deeply. “But what about Eunae?”

Your head rose as he shrugged. “What about her?”

“Haven’t you been wanting to take her out? I mean, let’s be honest, I’m half way between alive and dead. I’m not exactly a catch right now. Even if I wake up…I have a daughter. Eunae doesn’t have baggage like me.”

Namjoon scoffed. “Everyone has baggage, Y/N. You wanna know my baggage? The real reason I haven’t asked Eunae out, I mean.”

You sat up fully, angling your body to face him and you nodded. “Lay it on me.”

He smiled before sighing. “Because I’m scared,” he said. “Not of Eunae or commitment but I’m scared of being left behind. My mom left my family when I was 7. Got home from school one day and all her stuff was just…gone. No note, no explanation. My mom was the happiest person in the world; if she was suffering in any way, you’d never know. I guess that’s what made it so easy for her to leave and have everyone reeling.”

“I’m so afraid that I could give my entire world to someone, like my dad did, and they could just take it all away from me. You build a beautiful life with someone, get married, have children, and then suddenly they’re just…gone. So, there you go. I’ve got mommy issues.” He laughed; short and humorless, twisting the ring on his finger in circles.

It would be a lie if you said you weren’t surprised, because you certainly were. Namjoon seemed so put together, like he had no problems in the world. It was a good reminder to not judge a book by its cover because you just never knew what was under the surface.

“I’ve got ex-boyfriend issues.” You finally said with a grin and he smiled. “It’s like you said, we’ve all got our baggage. Let’s not worry about things right now, we’ll face things as they come. First, though, I need to wake up.”

Namjoon chuckled, nodding. “Aren’t you hungry, by the way?” You asked and he looked down at his watch.

“Yeah, actually. I’m gonna order some take out. I’m feeling pizza.”

“If you put pineapples on it, I’ll judge you.”

Namjoon grimaced. “I’m not a monster."

.

.

Namjoon yawned loudly, stretched across the couch lethargically. Jin and Jimin had arrived shortly before the pizza and they’d brought company with them. Taehyung and Jungkook were as good looking as you remembered, Taehyung stretched like a cat across the carpet while Jungkook nursed his lukewarm beer.

It had been hours since the hospital; since the scare of the morning, and being with this group, though most didn’t know you were even there, made you feel like you’d been missing something all your life. Because of Tim (your ex,) you’d become rather isolated friend wise. There were a few work acquaintances and a couple friendly regulars at the bar, but it wasn’t the same as having a solid group of people to call your own.

You’d given up a lot of yourself to be with Tim and then in turn to be a mother. You wondered if being a part of a group like this was still attainable. Between work and spending time with Cora, having friends just seemed like an impossible dream. The first thing you needed to do when you woke up was to find a new job. You couldn’t keep going on acting like these sort of relationships weren’t important.

Namjoon yawned again, standing and stretching. “I gotta get to bed. I’ve got clinicals again tomorrow and I’m barely functioning as is.”

“Night!” Taehyung called from the floor, eyes blinking slowly up at him, looking more cat like and regal than before. Namjoon said his goodnights before looking over at you and inclining his head slightly towards the hallway. You moved from your spot in the living room and followed him down the hall towards his room. He shut the door after the two of you, clearing his throat and you watched him curiously.

“I was wondering,” He idled, scratching the back of his neck. “Would it be weird if I asked you to stay with me…in here? I know you don’t sleep right now but, it would make me feel better to have you closer. No pressure, of course! I was just wondering.”

His words tapered off in his embarrassment and you smiled. “Which side?” You asked.

He grinned, pointing to the right and you moved towards the mattress, sitting down and patting his side of the bed. “Come on then.” You hummed. He chuckled, cheeks pinker than before.

“I need to change and brush my teeth.”

“I’ll be here.” You nodded, moving to lay down against the bed.

He returned not long after, dressed in pajamas and smelling minty. He grabbed the covers that had been squished down towards the end of the mattress and pulled them up and over your shoulders. Burying himself the same, he stared over at you and you watched him pull the blankets to his chin.

“Thanks for humoring me.” He muttered softly.

“I’m not humoring you; I want to. It’s nice to be here with you, to feel normal again.”

He scooted a little closer, reaching his hand out carefully to touch your arm. You could feel it as though your body was really here, lying with him in this bed. So real, so intense.

“It’s like you’re really here.” He whispered, running the tips of his fingers gently down your arm and watching the goosebumps left in his wake. “Not in that hospital bed.” You shivered.

“Yeah.”

He tucked his chin into his chest, clearing his throat once again. “Uh…I like to cuddle at night, is…is that ok?”

You chuckled, nodding and his hand slid carefully around your waist, pulling you closer. You could feel the warmth of his chest through your fingertips and you tried not to let your emotions show.

“Goodnight.” You whispered.

His fingers dancing across your spine was his reply as he closed his eyes, drifting quickly to sleep.

.

.

It was still dark when the bird’s started chirping; happy and bright like they knew the sunrise was on its way. Namjoon’s alarm hadn’t gone yet, but his body had woken as though on instinct. His bed felt empty, the room absent as well and he sat up suddenly.

“Y/N?” He called, stepping from his bed and into his slippers. There was no reply and he opened the door to his room, moving down the hallway and into the living room. The empty beer bottles and pizza boxes from last night were still laying on the coffee table, but otherwise, the room was deserted.

Namjoon’s heart lurched uncomfortably in his chest. “Y/N?” He whispered. Still no answer.

Where were you? You’d been practically attached to his hip the last few weeks, but where were you now? What if you had died during the night? He hadn’t prepared himself for a situation like that and he felt suddenly nauseous. Rushing back to his room, he quickly showered before dressing and running from the apartment. He was in such a hurry he nearly left his bag.

The subway was even emptier this time of morning. He’d left earlier than normal, but fear was controlling his limbs right now and he could hardly sit still; knee bouncing loudly in the empty carriage.

What if he got there and you’d died? Been moved to the morgue? Bile rose in his throat and he closed his eyes, willing the thought away. He couldn’t handle this right now, he’d deal with it later if it came to it. Maybe you were just attached to your body in the hospital room now. Stranger things had happened, right? Seeing ghosts in the first place definitely fit that bill.

When the subway arrived at his station, he rushed from the train and up the stairs out into the morning. Birds were chirping louder now as the sun was starting to rise. Namjoon didn’t even stop to drop his things off in his locker, he walked as quickly as was acceptable to the room he knew was yours.

Rounding the corner, his body sagged with relief to see your body still laying in the bed. He moved closer slowly, watching your chest rise and fall and he thought he’d throw up all over again from the emotions rushing through him. Still, he didn’t see your ghost standing anywhere around and he ached to know what had happened; where you had gone. He moved closer still, standing over your bed and reaching out carefully to run his hand over your forehead.

His heart nearly dropped as your eyes fluttered open, darting around the room before settling on him. You smiled and he felt like his whole body was melting into the floor.

“You’re here.” You whispered.

“You remember?” He asked, eyes stinging.

You nodded. “Everything.”

Namjoon choked back a sob, the stinging behind his eyes leaving tracks down his cheeks as he bent forward, hugging you close. “I thought you’d died.”

“I’m sorry I scared you,” you said, running your fingers through his dark hair. His tears wet through to the skin of your shoulder. “I felt a tug, though, the sort you can’t ignore, and then I was back here in my body. I knew you’d come.”

He pulled back to look at you, smiling and you pulled his face down towards yours, kissing him softly. “Thank you for helping me.” You whispered against his mouth and he kissed you again before pulling away.

“I didn’t do anything.” He huffed, but you shook your head to dispute.

“You saw me. You have no idea how much I wanted to be seen.”

You hoped he knew what you really meant.

You had the feeling he did.

“Thank you for not hating me after I was so rude to you at first.” He smiled shyly.

You chuckled, running your fingers down his cheek. “Well, I was a trespassing ghost.” Namjoon’s stomach growled loudly and you looked down before back up at him. “Have you eaten?”

He flushed, shaking his head no. “I was so worried you’d died; I couldn’t think of anything else.”

You glanced up at the clock and then back at him. “There’s still an hour before your clinicals start. Go now and get some breakfast from the cafeteria.” He looked like he meant to refuse you and you smiled, kissing him once more. “I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be here when you get back.”

He grumbled but stood, shaking his hair through with his fingers and nodded. “I’ll ask the doctor if I can call your family with the news. I really want to be the one to do it.”

“I want that too.” You grinned.

.

.

Once the sun had fully risen and you’d been fed, Dr. Bang entered the room, smiling bright. “We sure are happy to see you awake. You gave us a scare the other morning.”

You sent Namjoon a private smile before answering, “Yes, I heard thanks to Mr. Kim.”

“Namjoon will make an excellent Doctor someday.” Dr. Bang smiled, “you’ve been in very good hands.”

The next few minutes you spent with Dr. Bang as he explained your progress to you so far and Namjoon stepped out of the room to call your family. They still weren’t sure why you’d had a seizure and you wondered absently if somehow it had woken you up, but thankfully all scans and bloodwork had come back normal since then.

Both Namjoon and Dr. Bang had to return to work, with promises to return when your family came. Suddenly, you were left to your own thoughts. You’d been in a coma for just over a month so you really hadn’t missed much of the world, especially since your spirit or ghost or whatever you had been, had been wandering around seeing and hearing things.

Mostly, you’d missed out on time with your family. Your daughter. You couldn’t wait to hold her in your arms. You wondered if you’d have to testify at Tim’s trial. Most likely. You were alive and well, but he had intended anything but and you needed to make sure he never had the opportunity again.

When your family finally arrived, Namjoon stayed close by your side, explaining to them what had been going on with your care as you cuddled Cora in your arms. She talked happily about her upcoming show-and-tell at daycare and you discussed all the things she thought maybe she could take with her.

Your brother Ethan owned a snake that your daughter was a little bit obsessed with and you were mildly afraid he’d actually let her take it with her to show off. Ethan and Luke were both “cool” uncles, giving Cora anything she wanted and sometimes you questioned their motivations. You had the feeling they were both vying for the position of favorite uncle.

Come lunch time, after your family had left and you’d eaten, you laid back in your bed, staring out the window as a bird soared passed and landed on the branch of a nearby tree.

“How are you feeling?”

You turned to see Namjoon standing by the door and you smiled. “Good. Tired, but really good.”

“Do you have enough energy to see one more guest?” He asked, and you frowned. Another guest? But who?

He motioned for someone to come in and you smiled brightly as a familiar handsome man in a leather jacket entered. “Jimin!”

Jimin laughed, scratching at the back of his neck. “This is weird,” he admitted with a grin. “I know we technically met but, you know.” He shrugged and you laughed.

“But you couldn’t see me. Well now you can; how’s it feel?”

“Surreal.” He admitted, walking to the side of your bed. “You said my name with so much confidence and I’ve never seen your face before. It’s like meeting someone you’ve met before and forgetting their name. I’m a little embarrassed.” “I’m truly offended.” You nodded resolutely and he grinned, taking the seat beside your bed.

“What are you going to do now? Back in the world of the living, everyone can see you. It must feel like a new lease on life.”

You smiled, twisting the sheets over your lap between your fingers. “I’m gonna find a new job. I’ve got two right now that make me feel like I have barely anytime to breathe, let alone feel human again. I want a change of pace.”

“They’re hiring receptionists here, you know.” Namjoon said suddenly. “Not yet, I mean, but I know a few of the current receptionists are going back to school and planning on putting in their two weeks. Maybe I could put in a good word. Hours are decent and pay is good.

” “Thank you, Namjoon. I’d appreciate that.”

.

.

~ 1 year later ~

“I don’t want to wear pants!” Cora complained loudly and you sighed, rubbing your eyes.

“Honey, I told you before, we’re moving boxes today; a dress just isn’t practical.”

Cora stomped across the room, sitting down on the couch between boxes. She was wearing the frilly pink dress you’d bought for her just last week and looking like a little pouting princess. Goodness, if she weren’t your kid…

“I hate pacticyool.” She frowned and you chuckled, moving to stoop in front of her.

“It’s practical, and that just means that it will be hard to do things in your beautiful new dress. We’re gonna be getting dirty. Do you really want your beautiful princess dress to be covered in dirt and maybe even get ripped?”

Cora huffed, kicking her feet forward slightly in a miniature tantrum before letting her folded arms fall to her sides. “I don’t want it to get broken.” She admitted and you stood, reaching out your hand for her.

“Then let’s change quickly. Namjoon and Jimin will be here soon.”

“What about uncle Taehyungie? He promised to bring me a ring when he got back.”

You smiled, hoisting her to her feet and helping her maneuver through the boxes back to her nearly empty room. One box left open with a small t-shirt and some jeans on top, you helped her to unzip the back of her dress.

“Taehyung, Jungkook, and Jin will be waiting at our new apartment for us. I’m sure they’re all really excited to see you!”

This cheered her up and she quickly helped you to drag her t-shirt over her head, insisting she could do it herself like the independent little stinker she was. After getting her into a pair of socks and taping the last box with her pink dress safely inside, you stared out back over the tiny, dingy little apartment one more time.

It was a piece of crap, honestly, but it had been your piece of crap since Cora was only a baby. You’d had a lot of really amazing memories here and a couple of not so amazing memories too. It was bitter sweet to say goodbye.

A knock at the door roused your attention and you went to open, beckoning both Namjoon and Jimin inside excitedly. “Good morning!” You cried as you shut the door behind you. “Did you bring your muscles?”

“And then some.” Jimin flirted, wiggling his eyebrows at you and you laughed. Namjoon smacked his shoulder, going to reach for your waist before pausing.

Cora had come back into the living room just then, curly, red haired ragdoll clamped in her little arms and she beamed widely as she saw the two new additions to your party. She didn’t know about Namjoon and you yet, you’d been afraid to introduce her to someone that might not be a more permanent fixture in your life until you were positive.

Now…well, the small rock on your finger made you feel safe, but with “uncle” Jimin in the room, now was not the time to tell her. “Namjoon! Uncle Jimin!” She shouted happily, bouncing towards them and into their arms.

Your heart soared as she clung tightly to Namjoon’s neck and he rubbed his hand up and down her back. You couldn’t have asked for a better man to raise your daughter with you. Couldn’t believe he was so willing to step up to the plate.

You ushered everyone to start grabbing things before you got misty eyed and the four of you spent the next ten minutes moving boxes into the moving truck. Namjoon and the guys had helped last night too, after Cora had gone to sleep, so there wasn’t much to move now, but you’d insisted on leaving a few of the light one’s so she could feel like a “big girl helper.”

After everything was packed up, the four of you squished into the cab of the moving truck and started the journey to the other side of the town, closer to your new job. Namjoon had kept his word and had helped you to get a job at the hospital.

Your first paycheck had nearly made your eyes bug out of your skull and you’d definitely cried as your skimpy looking bank account had sagged with its weight.

 You were by no mean’s rich, but you felt like you were these days.

.

.

The apartment complex was newer construction. White stucco and tree lined streets greeted you as you arrived. Namjoon had gone apartment hunting with you at your insistence. Once you told Cora about the two of you (and mitigated any potential problems or confusion,) you intended for him to move in with the two of you. You wanted him to like the place.

Jin had groaned about finding a new roommate, complained loudly about the hassle and Jimin had rolled his eyes, whispering that they’d actually already gotten someone; Seokjin was just a drama lover and wanted a rise. He’d been disappointed not to get one, but you’d just laughed.

Cora was overjoyed to see Taehyung as you pulled up along the curb, practically leaping into his arms once he’d unbuckled her. You followed after her, Jungkook holding out a hand for you to take as you stepped down and you thanked him.

Taehyung let the rest of you grab a box while he carried Cora up to the 16th floor (on the elevator, of course. He wasn’t a martyr.) Jin complained about Tae being a slacker and you grinned, sliding the key into your door, pushing it open and stepping inside.

“Wow, nice digs!” Jungkook complimented, walking into the open floor plan main room, across the linoleum floors and to the window. “You’ve got a balcony?” He cried suddenly, twisting the lock. “What luxury is this?”

You laughed, placing your box on the kitchen counter and moving to stand on the balcony with him. “Nice right? Not much of a view, really, but it’s not a brick wall either, so we’re really moving up in the world.”

Namjoon laughed from behind you, hugging you around the waist and you glanced over your shoulder to see Cora occupied with Taehyung at the countertop. She was opening a small sparkly purple box that you assumed was her new ring and you grinned before cuddling further into Namjoon’s chest.

“We don’t have balconies in student housing.” Jungkook complained.

“Someday, man.” Namjoon said, standing and patting him on the shoulder.

“Mommy!” Cora squealed and you could hear her bare feet slapping across the linoleum as she ran to you. You turned and bent down to look as she held her fist in the air. “I’ve got a ring like you now!”

You smiled, staring down at the giant pink ring, lopsided on her finger from being slightly too big. “So you do!” you cried happily as she jumped around, thrusting her fist in everyone’s face for them to have a look.

After an appropriate amount of time spent praising Cora’s new ring, you all returned to the truck to grab more boxes. After 10 minutes, Cora began to complain about being tired so Taehyung took her back up to the apartment to keep her occupied while the rest of you finished the job.

You ordered takeout that would hopefully arrive right around when you were finished in the truck and spent the next 20 minutes daydreaming about cream cheese filled rangoons. You were famished by the time the food had arrived (and thrilled into a small victory dance due to a working doorbell.)

Everyone sat down on the living room floor, Cora with a pillow underneath her, and you all chatted late into the afternoon. Early evening came and everyone said their goodbyes, only Namjoon staying for dinner.

You made spaghetti, Cora’s favorite, and Namjoon helped her to find the box full of her stuffed animals. You’d all managed to set up the large furniture before the others had, had to leave, so at least there were beds and seating. You’d spend most of your day off tomorrow unpacking while Cora was at her grandparent’s house.

“Dinner’s ready!” You called, setting plates and forks down on the table. “Cora, baby, do you want juice or water?”

“Water, please.” She requested, crawling up into the dining chair and grabbing her fork. She dug in messily and you watched as she slurped spaghetti messily up and over her chin. Oh well, she was getting a bath anyway.

After grabbing waters, you sat in your own seat, smiling over at Namjoon as he waited for you to eat. You took a bite of your food, staring down at your daughter as she waved her head back and forth over her plate, staring down at the noodle hanging from her mouth and wiggling like a worm.

“Cora, honey.” She looked up at you, eyes wide as though you would scold her and she slurped the noodle noisily into her mouth.

“Yes?” She questioned softly.

You looked over at Namjoon before continuing. Now was as good a time as any, you supposed. “What would you think if Namjoon came to live with us too?”

“Oh.” She said, looking over at him, taking in his features pensively. “That would be cool. He doesn’t have a bedroom, though. Where will he sleep mommy?”

“Well,” you started, but she interrupted quickly, ideas sprouting quickly in her little mind.

“We’ve got a couch!” She supplied, “Or, mommy says we have sleeping bags too.”

You chuckled, continuing on carefully. “Actually, mommy and Namjoon were thinking about getting married. What do you think about that? Would that be nice?”

“Married?” She mumbled, testing the word in her mouth. “Is that when mommy’s get babies?”

Namjoon choked on his sip of water and you giggled nervously. “Well, sometimes honey.”

“Mommy said she can only get a baby if there’s a daddy.” Cora replied matter of fact. “You can be a daddy, right?”

Namjoon patted at his mouth and the dribble of water in front of him on the table with his napkin before continuing. “Yes, someday I would like to be a daddy.”

Cora shrugged, going back to her spaghetti. “I think it sounds fun.” She replied, slurping another noodle into her mouth. “My daddy had to go somewhere right now, but maybe you can be my new daddy. Will you give me a sister? I really want a sister.”

Namjoon grinned over at you and then back at her. “I’ll definitely try my best to give you a sister.”

He chuckled as you smacked at his arm but Cora continued on. “When will you get married? I would like to have a sister soon, please.”

You reached across the table to pat at her mouth with your napkin. “Well, we haven’t decided when exactly we’ll get married, but soon. Maybe next year.”

“That’s forever away!” Cora complained. She turned to look at Namjoon. “Will you move in tonight?”

He smiled, rubbing at the back of her head. “Not tonight, but really soon. I don’t have any of my things to move in yet. Are you happy that mommy and I want to get married?”

Cora nodded, grabbing a fork way too full of noodles and attempting to shove them all in her mouth at the same time. “I think it’s cool.” She slurred sloppily around her mouthful. To un-trained ears, it sounded like a whole lot of noise and nothing else, but thankfully you were accustomed to her speech patterns.

You grimaced. “Babe, finish your mouthful before speaking, please.”

.

.

After Cora was tucked into bed and had finally fallen asleep, both Namjoon and you turned the TV on low and sat back on the couch. “Thank you for cleaning up.” You said softly and he smiled, wrapping his arm around your shoulders and kissing you softly.

“Happy to help.” He whispered back. “So, Cora seems happy.”

“Yeah,” you smiled, leaning your head back against his shoulder. “I’m glad. I was afraid…not that I had any reason to be; she loves you. Still, I want my two favorite people to get along.”

Namjoon reached for your hand, fiddling with the ring on your finger absentmindedly. “I’ll admit I was nervous too. Didn’t know what I would have done if she’d been upset. Turns out, all she was really concerned about was getting a baby sister.”

“Which you promised her.” You chuckled and he grinned, shrugging.

“I’ll at least enjoy trying to fulfill that promise.” He grinned wolfishly and you rolled your eyes with a smile.

“Well, actually, about that…” you trailed off, reaching for your purse and pulling something from it to hand to him.

He gaped down at the pregnancy test in his hands, mouth flapping uselessly as he grappled for words. “Really?” He asked, looking up at you with wide eyes.

“Really.” You nodded as he looked back down at the pregnancy test. “I took it last night…so, did you have fun trying?” You teased.

He laughed, looking down at you as his eyes darkened. “I did. Hey, you in the mood to roleplay?” He mused.

“What did you have in mind?” You grinned as he tucked his face into your neck, kissing along the edge of your jaw.

“How about some good old fashioned baby making?” He teased and you grinned.

You pulled his head up to hover over yours, staring into his eyes. “Are you OK with this? It wasn’t planned, but are you happy?”

His features softened, smile settling into a gentle simmer. “I couldn’t be happier.” He murmured, kissing you deeply.

You hummed against his mouth, wrapping your legs around his waist. “Take me to the bedroom, Mr. Kim.”

“With pleasure.” He grinned.

.

.

Thank you so much for going on this journey with me and being so patient! I decided to combine the last two chapters together. I hope you like it. Please let me know what you think! <3

Copyright © 2019 by Taeken-My-Heart. All rights reserved.

[sachigram]

((In standard me fashion, I picked a prompt from Shizaya Week, weeks late, and have no intention of doing the others, lmaoooooooooo)) 

Prompt: I can’t sleep so will you hold me?

Shizuo doesn't think he could ever get used to Izaya and his bat-shit flea antics entirely, but Izaya has proven to be easier to deal with than Shizuo ever would've thought before. There are often hidden truths in Izaya's actions, things ordinary people who don't deal with him often enough would think to look for. Shizuo doesn't consider himself an expert in anything, but he thinks he's become a decent flea-to-human to translator.

Izaya will cook, but not without making snide remarks about Shizuo's inability to cook. Izaya will do laundry, but will refuse to fold it. If Shizuo asks for Izaya to come home early, Izaya will do so, but he'll still arrive later than Shizuo requested. Sometimes it still annoys Shizuo what a brat Izaya is, but he can see Izaya is actually trying, and that's enough to keep Shizuo from flying off the handle.

Izaya's sleeping habits, however, remain a constant source of contention between them both. Shizuo has a regular sleep schedule and always has. Even when he's angry or upset, which is more often than not, he finds sleep easily. It's taken him a long time to wrap his head around Izaya's sleeping habits, which are all over the place. Truly, Shizuo still doesn't get it.

Izaya will be up all night and then wake early in the morning, even without setting an alarm. He'll pass out at his desk and be dead to the world, but wake up a mere hour later and go right back to work. Sometimes he'll be out after Shizuo goes to bed and already be gone in the morning before Shizuo wakes up. It drives Shizuo insane, especially when Izaya will have dark circles and bags under his eyes but still firmly refuse to lie down. Izaya always says he has too much work to do to sleep like a normal person, and then he'll make some scathing remark about Shizuo having a caveman sleep cycle, and they'll end up arguing. It's always the same song and dance, but Shizuo is getting fed up with following Izaya's lead.

Today, Izaya is at his desk, clacking away at his keyboard. He has a humongous coffee cup next to him, which he will occasionally reach for and sip from, and he has a blanket wrapped around his shoulders. He looks cute, and Shizuo hates him for it, because Shizuo wants to be mad at him.

“Why are you staring at me, Shizu-chan?” Izaya asks, and Shizuo glowers up at him.

“You didn't come to bed last night.”

“What's wrong? Are you worried I was out being unfaithful to you?” Izaya bats his eyelashes playfully, and he grins at the expression on Shizuo's face. “I told you, I have to work.”

“All night? And you're still at it. What are you even doing?” Shizuo grumbles.

“That's top secret! I don't ask you about your work, now do I?” Izaya keeps typing even as he speaks, barely glancing in Shizuo's direction. “I'll sleep when I'm done.”

“You're never done. As soon as you finish that one, you'll think of something else to do.”

“No rest for the wicked,” Izaya sings, still not looking at Shizuo. “It takes a lot to be as efficient as me, you know? I rest for one day and suddenly I'm out of the loop.”

“I'm not asking for an entire day! I'm asking you to sleep when you need it!” Shizuo snaps, and Izaya finally frowns up at him.

“Your nagging is unattractive.”

“You—!” Shizuo stands and stomps over to the desk, looming menacingly over Izaya. “Turn off. The computer,” he hisses through clenched teeth.

“I'm not tired, you idiot! Damn it, just—“ Izaya lifts his hand as if to wave Shizuo away, and Shizuo growls before grabbing Izaya's hand and tugging him. “Stop it! Shizu-chaaaaaaan!” Izaya wails as Shizuo drags Izaya, swivel-chair and all, towards the stairs. “Shizu-chan, you're hurting me!”

Shizuo freezes in his tracks and releases Izaya, who glares up at him, cradling his hand to himself. Shizuo feels guilty, feels like lead is in his stomach. He doesn't want to hurt anyone, but he especially never wants to hurt Izaya, even when the fucker deserves it.

“Sorry,” Shizuo mumbles.

“Oh, relax, I was kidding. You weren't hurting me; I just wanted you to let me go.” Izaya scoots himself back towards the desk, and he lifts his coffee cup, grinning at Shizuo over the rim. “What an expression you're making! I bet you wished you hurt me now, huh?”

Shizuo takes a deep breath, cracks his knuckles by one, and then moves towards Izaya again, who only looks up at him smugly. Shizuo leans onto the desk.

“You wanna work? Fine. But tonight, you're going to bed when I do, and you're not leaving the bed till I do,” Shizuo says.

“That's not happening,” Izaya says, taking another sip of coffee. Shizuo slaps the coffee out of his hands, and Izaya looks from the shattered cup to Shizuo, clearly irritated.

“Yes the fuck it is happening, 'cause if you refuse, I'm gonna throw your computer out the window, and then I'm gonna tie your scrawny ass to the bed for a week.” Shizuo smiles, but there's nothing pleasant about it. “What's it gonna be, I-za-ya?”

“You're going to tie me down? Kinky. I don't see how turning me on is going to get me to sleep.”

“Keep it up and I'll tie you upside-down.”

“Whoever would've guessed how high-maintenance you are?” Izaya sighs loudly and then shrugs. “Sure, what do I care? I'll just watch you sleep and do creepy stuff to you until morning. Will that placate you?”

“Yes,” Shizuo says, not threatened in the least. Izaya scowls, but doesn't argue, and that's a victory in Shizuo's book.

***

Hours later, after they've both eaten dinner, (Izaya at his desk, eating while working) Shizuo stands from the couch and yawns. He looks over at Izaya, who is pointedly ignoring him.

“Bedtime,” Shizuo announces.

“What? Now?” Izaya asks, looking from the monitor to Shizuo. “It's not even ten!”  

“I'm tired now,” Shizuo says. “Besides, you look like a zombie. You need it more than me.”

“I'm not tired!” Izaya whines, his legs kicking out a bit. Shizuo withholds a grin at Izaya's antics, finding them cute. Before they got together, he never would have guessed how childish Izaya can be. Izaya doesn't throw tantrums, but he does pout and whine when he's not getting his way, and his surly attitude will persist for a long time afterwards until the opportunity to be a vindictive little shit comes along. “Shizu-chan, I'm still not done!”

“A deal is a deal. Come with me, or I'm tying you down, and you'll miss even more work.” Shizuo crosses his arms and watches Izaya, who rolls his eyes, sinks into his chair, and glares at Shizuo with his bottom lip poking out.

“You're being unreasonable.”

“I'll count to three.”

“Shizu-chan, I just—“

“One.”

“This is really important. My life could be on the line if I—“

“Two.”

“I hate you. I detest you! You're horrible, absolutely the worst!”

“Three.”

Groaning loudly, Izaya pushes himself up, slumps his shoulders, and makes his way up the stairs, grumbling the entire way about Shizuo. Nodding to himself, Shizuo moves to Izaya's computer, shuts it down, and turns off all the lights before joining Izaya upstairs. Izaya is in the bathroom, cat ear headband pulling his bangs off his forehead, and he's brushing his teeth with his narrowed, catlike gaze settled on Shizuo.

“Keep sulking all you want. You not sleeping isn't impressing anyone. You're lucky you haven't passed out in the path of one of your enemies,” Shizuo says, pulling his shirt off. He unbuttons his pants and steps out of them, and when he looks up, Izaya is still glowering at him. Sighing, Shizuo walks into the bathroom, shoving past Izaya to get to his own toothbrush.

When Izaya is done, he moves on to his skincare, an extensive process. Shizuo finishes brushing his teeth and then leans against the counter, simply watching Izaya apply serum after serum to his face.

“You know, you could put less shit on your face if you'd just sleep sometimes,” Shizuo says, amusement clear in his tone.

“You sound like a broken record,” Izaya says.

“You sound like an asshole.”

Clearly fuming but not wanting to show it, Izaya slams the container in his hands onto the counter, not bothering to look at Shizuo. He moves on to the next step of the process, and Shizuo reaches out to tug on the hem of Izaya's shirt, pulling him closer.

“Let go of me. You're lucky I haven't kicked you out,” Izaya huffs, but Shizuo pulls him in anyway.

“I wouldn't have to nag you if you'd bother to take care of yourself,” Shizuo murmurs into Izaya's hair.

“I take care of myself just fine,” Izaya argues.

“You don't. Being clean and having good skin isn't taking care of yourself.”

“Neither is punching people. Neither is being a stupid, simpleminded beast of a man.”

“I think that's enough skincare. Clearly you're getting grumpy from lack of sleep,” Shizuo says, unaffected by Izaya's sharp tongue. Usually he'd be enraged, but the sight of Izaya in the cat ears is too endearing. He'll yell at Izaya later, he decides, and in a swift motion, he throws Izaya over his shoulder and carries him towards the bed. Izaya curses and squirms, his bony elbows digging into Shizuo's back, and Shizuo tosses him down onto the bed, grinning triumphantly down at him.

“At least let me get undressed,” Izaya grumbles. He pulls his shirt off, pulling the headband off along with it. He looks up at Shizuo expectantly.

“Oh, you want one of my shirts?”

“Clearly.”

Snorting, Shizuo tosses a T-shirt at Izaya, who pulls it on with a pleased expression. Izaya is just squirming out of his pants when Shizuo turns out the light, bathing the room in darkness. Izaya sighs again, flops back into the bed, and relents to being held, though he doesn't relent quietly.

Despite all of Izaya's bitching, he falls asleep within the hour. He's soft in Shizuo's arms, his leg wedged between Shizuo's, and he's breathing evenly, dead to the world. Shizuo smiles and runs his hand through Izaya's hair before he closes his eyes and lets sleep take him as well.

***

When Shizuo wakes, it's still dark.

It takes him a minute to figure out what exactly woke him, but then he realizes Izaya is moving around, muttering little things under his breath.

“Flea?” Shizuo asks softly. Izaya doesn't respond, and Shizuo realizes Izaya is dreaming, talking in his sleep.

“Need to...work...” Izaya says something else after it, unintelligible, and he swats at Shizuo, who is beyond amused. “Brute.” Izaya finishes.

“What's that? You dreaming of me?”

“Hate you.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Shizuo says. He lifts his hand to wipe some drool off his chin, and Izaya makes an affronted little noise, pawing at Shizuo's chest. “What?”

“Want...want Shizu-chan...”

“I'm right here.”

Izaya whines and burrows closer, still swatting at Shizuo.

“Flea, quit it, I'm right here!” Shizuo huffs, though he's finding it hard to be annoyed when Izaya is being so cute. Izaya makes another anguished sound and presses his face into Shizuo's neck.

“Hold me...” Izaya's words are muffled, barely audible, and Shizuo wonders if he imagined them. Izaya is never this clingy, this open with his desires.

Gently, Shizuo wraps his arm around Izaya, who makes another noise, this one sounding happy. Izaya stops squirming and the room grows quiet once more, save for the pounding of Shizuo's heart. Izaya is a pain in the ass, and he's hard to deal with, and he's stubborn as all hell, and he's the last person in the world who should feel safe with Shizuo, but he does. He's here, sound asleep in Shizuo's arms, asking to be held, and Shizuo feels a lump in his throat.

“Izaya...”

Izaya hums in reply, clearly contented, and Shizuo kisses Izaya's forehead, pulls him closer, and dares to hold him a little tighter.

[cutiepisenpai]

Part 1 of 3.   Part 2   Part 3

Kenma X F!Reader

Warnings: Fluff, Implied Sex

Kenma is a well known and extremely successful video game streamer. He has millions of followers who would show up day after day and watch his hours-long streams. His followers of course know very little about his life outside of gaming. The shy streamer shared nothing of his personal life and his fans searched for any miniscule amount of information they could find. They all knew about his best friend Kuroo who would show up in his streams from time to time. They also knew he has a long time girlfriend, they heard you talking to him on a few streams before but you never come into view of the camera. The few times that they had heard her she was checking in on him. His followers have asked many times if he would ever reveal her and he always says no. He likes his private life to stay private, but little did they know that there is another reason other than privacy that he didn’t show his girlfriend in videos is because you are a very popular vlogger and cosplayer. Back when you were in high school he was in a few of your videos that are now private, long before either of you rose to popularity becoming the big names you are known as now. Some older viewers of yours know about your relationship and thankfully have kept that secret for you as well. But there are still people who just want to know anything they can.

Right now you are doing a live Q and A and can’t count how many times, ‘Who are you dating?’ has shown up in the chat. 

“Alright guys the Q and A can’t just be you asking me about my relationship. So for the final time no you don’t get to know his name or see what he looks like.” You say, before continuing on answering questions about upcoming conventions and cosplays you are working on.

“Okay guys it’s about time to bring this to its end…” At that moment Kenma peeks his head in and you look up over the camera. “Hey, I was just signing, off I’ll be there in a minute.” Kenma nods leaving the room.

“Ok I am out until next time.” You say ending the live.

Sitting back into your chair giving a little stretch before getting up and walking out of the room. You find your way to Kenma who is lounging on the couch switch in hand. You sit down next to him leaning your head on his shoulder.

“Sup, puddin’?” 

He shrugs, “Nothing, your stream went well. Except for all the people asking about me.” 

Another thing no one knows is that you moderate each other's chats while streaming. 

“They just want your beautiful face to grace their screens.” You joke. 

“Do you want them to know?” He asks.

“Nah, I prefer to keep you all to myself but I would be glad to stop all the questions.”

“That wouldn’t stop the questions. They will ask hundreds more after finding out.” He says.

“True. If we ever decide to tell them then I can finally convince you to dress up at a con with me.”

“Not a chance.” He shuts you down.

“Oh, come on.”

Your regular day could be hectic; you usually filmed early in the morning while Kenma was still sleeping before editing or working on your cosplay. Today you are filming several videos consecutively because you were going to a gaming expo with Kenma and you can’t film or stream while there together. You also needed to pack later for the both of you for the trip. Kenma could pack for himself but it's easier on both of you if you just do it. While you are busy getting everything you need to do done, Kenma sleeps on peacefully.

You may have thought that Kenma was asleep when you got out of the bed, but he hadn’t slept at all that night. He had big plans that you are unaware of. He talked with Kuroo and Hinata but neither helped calm his nerves. He lays awake in the bed exhausted, he can hear you filming in the next room. The sounds of your cheerful laughter makes him smile. He has been so exhausted trying to keep his plans a secret from you and soon it will all come to a close. He takes a deep breath before sitting up and dragging himself out of the bed. He pulls his suitcase out of the closet and starts packing. 

Once you are done filming you walk back to the bedroom to find Kenma has already packed his bad and started on yours. He is currently looking into your underwear drawer confused. 

“What are you doing?” You ask.

“Packing.” He says bluntly and you roll your eyes.

“I see that, I meant why?”

“We’re going on a trip.” This guy can’t be serious.

“I am also aware of that...”

“Why do you own so many different types of underwear.” He asks cutting you off.

“What?” 

“They’re organized in pairs, but why are there just so many?”

“Pairs?” 

“Tops and bottoms.” He hasn’t turned to face you looking at the drawers offendedly. 

“I was going to pack.”

“I couldn’t sleep so I just did it.”

“Did I wake you?” You ask. He shakes his head in response. “Okay, well thank you for packing, but I can take it from here.” 

Kenma makes no effort to move, giving the drawer one last glance before picking up a sheer mesh bra and panty set. “You should bring these.” He says, before kissing your forehead and walking away. 

A few hours later and your bag is packed you set it and Kenma’s next to the front door stopping  by his stream room to check in on him. You peek inside waiting to catch his attention. 

“I’m not streaming right now.” He says.

You walk over sitting in his lap and draping your hands over his shoulders. 

“What are you doing?”   

“Just editing some clips for while we are gone.”

“Ah, I need to go edit my videos too.” 

“You should probably go and get that done.” He says. 

“Trying to get rid of me.” You feign being hurt.

“No but I don’t want you to be stressed about it tomorrow while we are traveling.” 

You share a quick kiss before you are on your way out. Once he is sure you’ve gone to work on your own stuff he pulls the video program back up that he had been working in. It was a video he had already edited several times trying to assure it was perfect. 

The next morning bright and early, much to Kenma’s dismay, you were off heading to the convention. The first night would be a preview night, but that didn’t mean you could walk around as a couple. You actually avoided each other a bit so that no one would become suspicious. He hung with other game streamers while you met up with some vloggers you know, occasionally coming together your close friends always asked if it was difficult to do these events together when you had to pretend to not be a couple. And of course it could be difficult but you were both used to it at this point. During these events Kenma wished that everyone knew about your relationship already so that he could have you next time while he dealt with the hordes of people he encountered. By the end of the first night you are both completely exhausted and after your showers you fall asleep quickly. Kenma wakes up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. He looks over to you sleeping peacefully and decides to go into the other room. He opens his laptop playing an RPG game, but he can’t focus and dies repeatedly. He grows frustrated until you plop down on the couch beside him startling him.

“You should be asleep.” He says.

“You’re one to talk. Why are you in here?”

“Can’t sleep.”

“What’s wrong?” You ask.

“Nothing.”

“I know you better than that. Something has been bothering you. I thought you were stressed about the trip but now I know I’m not sure.”

Kenma is quiet, he is normally quiet but this is a telling silence. 

“I’m just worried about tomorrow.” He sighs.

“What’s tomorrow? The tournament?”

“Yeah.” He lies. 

“You shouldn’t worry about something as silly as that you’ll be great.” You say to reassure him. 

Seeing you smile believing so wholeheartedly in him, helped relieve the immense amount of stress he had been feeling. 

“Ready to go back to bed.” You ask.

“Yeah.” 

Kenma finally got to sleep peacefully for the first time in weeks. The next morning trying to wake Kenma up requires effort and patience.

“Come on Puddin’. You have to get up.” 

“Don’t want to.” He mumbles. 

“We’ve got to get downstairs.” You say and receive no response. 

“I’ll give you kisses.”

“You’ll do that anyways.” You hear muffled from under the covers. 

“You are right, Okay what do I have to do to get you out of bed.”

“Nothing I’m not getting up.”

“I’m not going to keep playing nice with you.” No response. “Okay.”

You pull the covers off of him climbing over him and straddling his hips. He cracks an eye open looking up at you and moves his hands to your hips. 

“What is your plan?” 

“Get up.” You say adamantly. 

“You don’t scare me.” 

“I have an incriminating photo of you.”

“You would never post that.”

“You’re right I wouldn’t, I have a better plan. I will send it in the group text to the team.”

He opens both of his eyes wide, “You wouldn’t”

You pull your phone out, “Try me.”

“You’re mean but fine.” He pouts sitting up and coming face to face with you. 

You smile at him, “See that wasn’t so hard.”

He kisses your forehead and taps your legs for you to get up. Down at the expo today Kenma is busy meeting his fans, you watch from a distance and even from where you are standing you can see how uncomfortable he is. You want nothing more to go over and comfort him but you know you can’t. You send him a text instead, 

To Puddin’:

You’ve got this just take a deep breath. 👍

He opens the message and smiles, the crowd notices and breaks out in questions and you are glad you weren’t over there. Later on that same day you meet up before the tournament starts.

“This is so exhausting. How do you do this so often?” He asks 

“Mmm, I’m much more of a people person that you. But I think I just got used to it.” You look at the clock nearby, “Alright it looks like it’s time to head over for the tournament.” 

He hums in agreement getting up and heading out of the door before you. You wait a few minutes after he leaves before leaving yourself and going to take your seat watching the tournament begin. Kuroo shows up taking the seat next to you, “Hey, what’s up?” Kuroo says.

“What are you doing here?” You ask him.

“Wow you hurt me and I thought we were friends.” Kuroo says clutching his hands close to his chest.

“I’m happy to see you. I'm just surprised. Shouldn’t you be at work.”

“I got out of it.” He says proudly. 

You raise an eyebrow at him, “Oh yea do they know you’re at a gaming expo?”

“You don’t tell my secret and I won’t tell yours.”

“I don’t have any secrets.”

“So your millions of followers know about Kenma now.”

“Shut up.”

The announcer comes out and introduces the gamers playing in the tournament. You and Kuroo cheer loudly and embarrass Kenma just a bit. The tournament has been going well, everyone making quiet conversation, Kenma has gotten into a groove playing intensely. Suddenly the power goes out. You feel Kurro’s hand grip your wrist, people murmur around you. ‘Sorry for the interruption everyone. We will fix the power and be back momentarily.’ The announcer says. 

“Are you afraid of the dark?” You ask Kuroo.

“No, are you?”

“No but I am also not holding onto you.”

“I’m keeping you safe.”

“From what exactly.”

“Creeps.” 

You laugh knowing he is completely serious. The screen on the stage flickers before lighting up and everyone's attention is directed towards it. A video begins to play, “Hey, it’s Kenma.” You say to no one in particular. He looks nervous almost fidgeting before he takes a breath and starts talking, “Hi everyone I am Kozuken if you didn’t know I am a pro - gamer.” You stand and watch trying to figure out what this video is, “I am not good at this, but I made this video for something important. My followers have always asked about my girlfriend and for privacy reasons I never show her in my videos. But she is the.. I don’t…  there aren’t words to describe her.. But this video is for her.” There are a series of awws heard all around. The video shows a montage consisting of photos and video clips in chronological order, starting from when they first met in middle school to high school with the volleyball team, graduation from high school. When they lived together in college and the moments of their life until now. You are so engrossed in the video you don’t see everything moving around you. As the montage ends Kenma is back on the screen. “She is my heart and soul and I can’t imagine my life without her and so if she would just turn around I have something to ask her.” The video ends and when you turn around Kenma is behind you down on one knee ring in hand. 

“Will you marry me?”  

You stand there in shock because you hadn’t suspected it at all but you can see him starting to panic from your silence. 

“Yes, of course I will.”

You had forgotten you were at a public event surrounded by thousands of people until the crowd cheers startling the both of you. He stands sliding the ring on your finger giving you a quick kiss on the cheek. There are cameras flashing and people cheering all around. You are ushered out by the event coordinators helping you back to your room. Once inside with the doors closed you are finally able to take a deep breath and take in what happened. You feel a rush of excitement and jump wrapping your arms around him. 

You let out a high pitched squeal, “Oh my god. I can’t believe that just happened. I had no idea…” You begin to ramble. 

Kenma just looks at you in awe smiling. He listens to your rambling just happy he was finally able to get that done and even happier that you said yes. You two stop when you hear a knock followed by the door promptly opening.

“Hey lovebirds, please tell me you’re decent. Wouldn’t want to see that again.” Kuroo says walking into the room.

“If you would stop walking in without anyone prompting you that wouldn’t have happened the first time.” Kenma says as your face heats up at the thought of that incident. 

“Ah, just yell out before I can see anything.” He smirks, “You know to let me know. But I guess that could be confused with the other kind of yelling out.”

“Okay, what do you want?” You ask before he can say anything else. 

“To celebrate with you of course. I’ve seen this from the very beginning now let’s break out the champagne and celebrate since you know pudding head finally decided to announce his love for you to the world.”

“To the world?” You ask. 

“Oh yeah that whole thing was live streamed on both of your channels.” Kuroo says.

You look to Kenma who is avoiding eye contact, “Is that true?” 

“Yea, sorry I didn’t ask it would’ve ruined the surprise.”

“It’s okay I’m just surprised and a little scared to check my phone now.” 

“Do that later after you’re completely blitzed.” Kuroo cheers popping the cork on the champagne. 

You spend the rest of the afternoon cuddled next to Kenma drinking way more than you should and talking with Kuroo. Late into the evening Kuroo says his goodbyes before heading for his own hotel room. You and Kenma are lying in bed and you can see your phone flicker every few seconds with a new notification. The ringer had been turned off long ago. You turn over in bed to face Kenma gently moving the strands of hair from blocking his eyes. He grabs a hold of your hand bringing it to his lips and kissing it. 

“Tomorrow is going to be a very long day.” You say.

“It is .” Kenma nods in agreement.

“At least I can stick close to you. Since everyone knows now.”

“Yea that will be good.”

You have a big smile plastered on your face. “What?” Kenma asks.

“I’m just happy.”

“Go to sleep.”

The next day things are eventful normally the final day of any event would be calm and this was anything but that. Fans are still buzzing over the news of you two and the engagement surprise offering the congratulations. The day is overwhelming for both of you and by the time it is over you are ready to be back in your own peaceful and quiet home. When you finally decide to check social media you are bombarded by thousands of photos, videos, clips and mentions. Most are positive but there are a few critical tweets here and there. It is just too much and you decide it can be avoided for a little while longer. It can’t be avoided forever. Both of your careers require you to react eventually and it will come sooner rather than later since you have filming and lives planned. At the house you want to collapse on your bed, you slowly change waiting for Kenma to come in but he doesn’t. When you find him he is in his streaming room staring at the three monitors. 

“Couldn’t wait to play.”

“”Hmm, I’m not playing.” He says turning slowly to face you but looking back at the screen. As you approach him and the screen comes into view you see that he is in fact scrolling through twitter, something that he never does. He opens his arms up a gesture you have come to know as him asking you to sit in his lap. You do just that sitting between his legs leaning your back against his chest. 

“So why are you scrolling through twitter?” You ask.

“It’s faster on my pc than my phone.” 

“Understandable, the question is still the same.”

“I had a lot of notifications.” 

“Well when you decide to abruptly make your private relationship with another well known creator public that happens.” You say.

“Are you sure you’re okay with this?”

“Yes.”

“Well so long as I am with you I am always happy.” He says hooking his chin over your shoulder.

“You should probably stop scrolling. It’s not good.” You say and he hums in agreement. “We can take a bath together and cuddle while playing an easy game.” 

The next week was hectic, you two tried to continue as usual. But during Kenma’s first stream back his chat was spammed with question upon question about you and your relationship. Why weren’t you on his stream, after three hours he ended his stream early out of frustration. You had a little better control in your own live for the most part, you started your live by saying you would not be discussing your personal life regardless of them knowing about the two of you now. You thanked everyone who sent their congratulations but still you had to remind them that you and Kenma still valued your privacy and not to go over to his channel and bother him. 

“We’re going to have to do a Q and A aren’t we.” Kenma says over dinner. 

“We don’t have to do anything, everything that we do is our own choice and our own decision.” 

“Do you think they will ever stop asking?”

“It may die down after a few weeks but there will always be questions.” 

You two end up announcing a joint live Q and A after too many of Kenma’s streams kept getting spammed with questions. 

“Hello everyone and welcome to our first and probably only ever joint Q and A.” You announce. 

You can feel the nervousness seeping out of Kenma, he was barely comfortable answering questions during his streams and then he had a buffer. Most of his focus on the game. It was strange to be here with Kenma if anyone had ever said when you started dating that one day he would propose to you with nearly a million people watching you would have thought it was a lie. Hell if someone had mentioned that something like this would happen even a month ago you wouldn’t believe it.

“I hope you all don’t mind listening to me talk because getting a lot out of this one is practically impossible.” You say gesturing to Kenma. “So we have a list of pre submitted questions we will be going through and after we will answer questions from the chat.” 

You hold up a notecard with a question for Kenma to read, “ ‘Where did you meet?’, Seriously that’s boring.”

“Okay so we actually met way back as first years in middle school. I was an exchange student and Kenma was my first friend in Japan.” Kenma nods along not feeling the need to add more.

“ ‘What was your first impression of me?’ Oh that’s a good one.” You read.

“You were quiet and shy. I don’t know where that went.”

“I got more comfortable around you. Is this your way of telling me to be more quiet?”

“No.”

“ ‘How long have you been dating?’ ” He reads, “Since high school.” 

“We have been dating for seven years since our first year of high school.” You say. 

There are comments in the chat talking about you being high school sweethearts and of course none of them would have ever had a chance with either of you since you have been together so long. You two have finally gotten into a groove answering questions, laughing and telling stories. Kenma loosens up after a while almost forgetting you are being watched live. You had gone through cards you had prepared and are now taking questions from the chat. 

“ ‘When are you going to get married?’ ” Kenma reads.

“Well since we’ve been engaged for less than two weeks no idea. Seriously take a guess and maybe you’ll be right. We probably won’t mention it publicly anyway. We love you guys but don’t want any wedding crashers.”

“ ‘What do you argue about the most?’ ” You read.

“Sleep probably?” Kenma says looking at you. 

“Yeah neither of us have the best sleep schedules and we argue telling the other that they need to sleep.” 

“ ‘Who wears the pants in the relationship?’ ”

“We like it best when neither of us are wearing pants.”

“ ‘Who said I love you first?’ ” 

“Well we were friends for a long time before we started dating So I love you was just a pretty normal thing to say like hello or goodbye by the time our relationship became romantic.” You say. 

“She did.” Kenma answers.

“Care to elaborate.”

“No”

“C’mon, you obviously remember and I don’t so it’s only fair that you share.” 

With a huff, “The first time you said it was when you were leaving to visit your home over the summer break. You hugged me and said I love you and that I would be the first person you saw when you got back.”

You are left speechless that he remembers that so vividly. The chat of course is filled with hearts and everyone talking about how cute it is that he remembered. 

“Okay everyone this is where we are ending this tonight because nothing else could top that. We hope that you are having a good morning, afternoon, or evening wherever you are in the world. Until next time.” You say ending the live. “Oh my god were you trying to make me cry on live.” 

“No.”

“Well I almost did. You do realize you are so cute and anyone who was not simping for you before that definitely is now.” 

“Why all I did was say what happened.” 

You give him a kiss, “Yea and that is exactly why.”

“That makes no sense.”

[spideyyystark]

Worst of you pt. 1 (Tom Holland)

I'm sitting at home and wait for my boyfriend. Again. He promised that it would be different. He promised that I wouldn't have to wait for him everyday but here we are. I fell almost asleep while watching Brooklyn 99 and waiting for him. But only almost. I hear the door open and close. I stand up and go to Tom who's putting his jacket in the closet.

"Where were you?" I ask concerned.

"It's none of your business." He answers and walks past me to the kitchen. I follow him sighing. That's how it always goes. I'm worried that something happened to him because he doesn't came home the time he said and when I call him I go straight to voicemail.

"There's dinner in the fridge." I tell him, leaning against the doorframe. He nods and puts it in the microwave to warm it up.

"Today happened the funniest thing ever." I grin at him. "You know my friend (f/n), right? Well she went to get coffees but-" Tom interrupts me and goes to the living room. He sits down on the couch and grabs the remote.

"You were watching Brooklyn 99? Again?" He asks me, shaking his head.

"It's my favorite tv show." I explain (if it's not just insert yours). "Anyways, (f/n) went to get us coffees and-"

"Honestly, I don't care." Tom says changing the channel and starts eating and meanwhile telling me about his day.

Another promise he broke. He promised me so many times that he would listen. But he never did except at the start of our relationship. But I actually don't really care. I love his voice and take every opportunity to hear it.

"Tomorrow is Haz's Birthday and he's throwing a party and we're obviously invited. We're going at 5." Tom says not really waiting for an answer or asking if I even want to go. I mean I want to go, Harrison's one of my best friends, but it's about the principle.

Whenever we're going out Tom's role-playing the good guy, like he's the most perfect boyfriend without any flaws and like we don't have any problems. And it's nice to forget them for a while and to act like everything's okay.

He's also lying about where he's always going and I believe him. But the next morning I realize how naive I am and that he's lying like always.

You promise it's different

You swear that you listened

I don't mind if you didn't

I just love the sound of your voice

You role-play the good guy

Lemon juice your white lies

But I see 'em in the Sunrise

He's got complete control about me, knowing that I'd do everything for him. He's the love of my life but apparently I'm not his. I know that he knows it too. Sometimes he uses it for his advantage.

If we would go swimming he'd probably let me drown. And I? I would be there with a band for him. When I'd hit the sea bed I would see Tom, and only him. Would I be angry? No, I love him too much.

You got me right in the palm of your hand and you know it

Oh It's what you do

So let me drown I'll be there with the band

Hit the sea bed

All I'd see is you

He could give me the worst excuses, no matter if they make sense or not, I just need a reason to stay with him. A reason not to leave him.

Whenever we kiss his lips taste like cherry lipgloss. I had thoughts about him cheating but I would've never guessed that he'd really do it. But I don't care. I would still kiss him. I would rather have him cheating on me, crushing my heart than walking away. He's giving me the worst of him but I want him anyway.

So give me your worst excuses

any reason to stay

Give me your lips that taste of her

I'd kiss them again

I'd rather you walk all over me than walk away

Give me the worst of you

Cause I want you anyway

"Happy Birthday Haz!" I smile at the birthday boy and hand him mine and Tom's present. It's one of my rare real smiles.

"Hey, (y/n), Tom, I'm glad you could come." He hugs me and then Tom who excuses himself right afterwards. Harrison looks at me, his eyes full with worry.

"Is everything okay?" He lowers his voice, not wanting everybody to be part of this conversation. I nod as a response. He doesn't seem to believe me, I wouldn't either. I'm a terrible liar.

"Again?" Haz asks, glaring at Tom who seems to have the time if his life. He's talking with his friends completely forgetting about his girlfriend he came here with. So much for the perfect boyfriend. But I'm used to it. He's always taking me to every party just to talk to his friends and leaving me alone.

I nod again, not being able to speak without my voice breaking.

"I'm sorry (y/n/n)" He says truthfully and embraces me in a hug.

"It's okay." I mumble in his chest. "Now go back to your party and have fun." I pat his chest and after a last glance at me he's doing what I wanted him to do. I sigh, I really don't want to pull Haz in all the drama. He only know because I used to call him when Tom didn't came home at night. He, Haz, helped me a lot in this time and I can't imagine a life without him as my best friend.

Tom let's me down so often but I let him do it again, every time.

So take me to every party and just talk to your friends

Why don't you let me down

I'll let you do it again

Go on and walk all over me just don't walk away

Give me the worst of you

Cause I want you anyway

"Hey, what are you doing here alone?" Tom sneaks up from behind, puts his arms around my waist and rests his chin on my shoulder. "You're supposed to have fun, it's a party."

"I'm having fun." I assure him smiling, a fake one this time.

"Are you sure?" He asks me, acting like he actually cares. That's the worst part of dating an actor: never knowing if it's real or if he's just acting.

I nod and tell him to go back to his friends. He does like I said but he's dragging me with him.

"What are you doing?" I ask him confused.

"You're going to have fun today." He smiles down at me. "I'm sorry that I let you down so often. But let me make it up to you." He whispers the last part in my ear, sending shivers down my spine.

"Guys, you know (y/n), right?" Tom introduces me to his friends.

"Your girlfriend?" One of them asks.

"Yup, that's her. The one and only." Tom gives me a small kiss. I enjoy really being his girlfriend for once. Who knows when I'm having this chance again?

"Thank you Haz for inviting us." I hug him as a goodbye.

"See you around." Tom and Haz do their handshake while Tom has one arm around my waist. Haz looks at me, raising an eyebrow. I just shrug my shoulders and smile.

As soon as the door closes Tom takes his arm away like I'm poisonous or disgusting or some like that. I sigh silently. I knew that this was going to happen sooner or later.

"Where are you? I called you like six times?" I ask Tom through the phone.

"Who are you? My mother?" He asks clearly annoyed.

"No, you're girlfriend! I'm sorry that I actually care about you."

"I'm an adult I can look after myself."

"I'll quote you the next time I have to pick you up when you're drunk."

Tom sighs.

"Look, I'm sorry. I overreacted."

"Because your day was stressful?"

"Yeah, that's why. I just want to come home."

"I'm sorry too. We can watch your favorite show and eat pizza if you want to?"

"Yeah sure." And with that he hangs up. I'm always letting him win and I basically make his excuses.

We make up, but I'll know we fistfight

Through iphones

My left hook a no-show

Cause I'll just keep letting you win

But baby the truth is I make your excuses

You let me down and I'm used to it

When Tom comes home I already put on his favorite tv show and put the pizza on two plates. He walks into our living room and sits down immediately. No hello or thank you, he just grabs his plate and waits for me to push the play button on the remote. I don't even say anything about it because I don't want to cause trouble. It's also something I'm used to. During our relationship Tom changed. He went to the bar every day, never talked to me and stopped treating me like I mean something to him. That's when I relied on Haz a lot. He helped me to go through the days without Tom. He also tells me every time I call him that I should leave Tom since it wouldn't make much difference. My answer is always that I can't break up with Tom because I love him. Harrison once Said what we both were thinking: "But does he love you?"

I snap out of my thoughts because Tom stands up.

"Where are you going?" I ask confused.

"Bed." And with that he goes upstairs. I follow after I cleaned everything up.

You got me right in the palm of your hand and you know it

Oh it's what you do

So let me drown I'll be there with the band

Hit the sea bed

All I'd see is you

After a short shower I lay down next to Tom who's already asleep. I watch him a little bit. He looks so innocent when he sleeps, like he could never do anything bad to anyone.

"I love you" I whisper and give him a small kiss on his hair.

So give me your worst excuses any reason to stay

Give me your lips that taste of her

I'd kiss them again

I'd rather you walk all over me than walk away

Give me the worst of you

Cause I want you anyway

I wake up because of the lack of warmth. Sleepily I open my eyes to see that Tom is already gone and his side is cold. I look at my phone to see what time it is. It's 9 am. Where the hell is Tom at this time? I mean he leaves the house early, yes, but never that early.

Anyways I decide to stand up and get ready since Haz and I wanted to meet. I wear a comfy but sweet outfit and put my (h/c) hair in a high ponytail.

I walk into the café where Haz already waits for me.

"Hey." I smile at him and we hug like always.

"How are you?" Haz asks me while we sit down.

"I'm fine. And you?"

"I'm fine too, thanks."

A waitress comes to us and we both order waffles and a coffee.

"So how's it going with Tom?"

"Why don't you ask him? He's your best friend?" I say a bit too harsh.

"The old Tom is my best friend. The new Tom is just an asshole. You're my new best friend. I don't want to be Tom's best friend when he acts like that." Harrison assures me.

The waitress comes with our orders and we thank her.

"You have to do something about the situation with Tom, (y/n). You can't live in a toxic relationship forever. You'll drown in it." Harrison says concerned.

"But I cant imagine a life without Tom." I try to protest but it fails miserably.

"You can't be happy like that." Harrison stands up from his chair to sit next to me and comfort me while I cry in his shoulder.

"I'm not but I-"

"No but's." He interrupts me. "You're going to break up with him and this time you don't come back to him right afterwards."

"Are you sure?" I look up from his now with tears stained shirt to his face.

"100%. You don't deserve that. Nobody does."

So take me to every party and just talk to your friends

Why don't you let me down

I'll let you do it again

Go on and walk all over me just don't walk away

Give me the worst of you

Cause I want you anyway (anyway, anyway)

Cause I want you anyway (anyway, anyway)

Back home I see Tom sitting on the couch.

"Hey, You're home." I say surprised and put my jacket in the closet.

"What's that?" He asks me with furrowed eyebrows and shows me an article on his phone.

Tom Holland's girlfriend cheating with Harrison Osterfield?

"That's not true." I assure him.

"Really?" I probably should break up with him now. That's the perfect time: He thinks I'm cheating and I, I don't know.

"Yes. I love you, not Harrison. I promise."

"Good."

I'm sorry Haz

Another night

Another dotted line

I sign my heart away to you

Some call it foolish

Guess I'll call it art

[janeyseymour]

Simple as Anything (pt. 1)

It’s as simple as anything really- Jane Seymour was not the put together woman she wished she was. Try as she might, she simply was not the perfect person that the beautiful queendom- and even her fellow queens, to an extent- made her out to be.

pt. 2 can be found here.

It’s as simple as anything really- Jane Seymour was not the put together woman she wished she was. Try as she might, she simply was not the perfect person that the beautiful queendom- and even her fellow queens, to an extent-  made her out to be.

--

When the six were first reincarnated, Jane had quite a hard time adapting to the modern world. Small rectangles that people carried with them constantly in order to connect with others? She couldn’t get over the fact that she didn’t have to struggle with reading and writing handwritten letters as often. Women were allowed to wear pants? The thought at first was completely beyond her. Women were allowed to have jobs? She wouldn’t be forced to marry someone she didn’t love? Women were able to speak up about the hardships they endured during relationships? They wouldn’t get absolutely dragged through the mud for simply existing? She was allowed to be vulnerable outside of her house- outside of her bedroom where no one else could see or hear her tears? Men weren’t simply looking at her with the idea that she would bear their children? Some people didn’t even want children anymore? The twenty-first century absolutely baffled her.

She did her best to adapt to the modern world; she really did. At first, when she learned that she didn’t have to keep every emotion at bay, it was waterworks all the time. It didn’t matter what happened. If someone treated her with basic human decency, the woman would dissolve into tears and thank the person endlessly for treating her kindly. Only when she got strange looks from others in the local coffee shop when she sobbed and thanked the kind barista did she realize that perhaps a grown woman crying hysterically because someone treated her politely was probably socially unacceptable.

As she took on the maternal role in the house (she was more than happy to do so), she realized that most of the mothers she saw out in public looked as though they had their entire lives together. Never did she see a woman with a child looking anything less than perfectly content with her life. Mothers these days had it all figured out- or at least that’s what she told herself. Maybe she knew that behind the facade they weren’t quite as happy as they made themselves out to be. Maybe it was the way she exclusively chose to watch the women who seemed content and not allow herself to see the women in the grocery store who looked like they were at their wits end when their child was throwing a tantrum at the checkout line because they wanted candy. Maybe she chose not to see the mothers who walked around town with spit up on their chest and bags under their eyes because they simply couldn’t have cared less about their appearance at that moment because they were so utterly exhausted. Maybe she did see it and chose to ignore it. All that the third queen knew was she saw women who were dressed to the nines and looking thrilled to have their sweet child with them. That’s all that mattered to Jane- she had to live up to that lifestyle.

As time went on, she learned the ways of the modern world a bit more. She finally figured out the blasted phone without too much help from Katherine- the youngest queen who had wormed her way into Jane’s heart and begun to call her ‘mum’. She was more than happy to be able to wear jeans or even a skirt that showed off a bit of leg without being berated for displaying too much skin. She was happily single and wasn’t planning on changing that any time soon. Men be damned; she was a free woman, and she was going to take advantage of that no matter the amount of men who had tried to pick her up at the bar down the road. She had gotten her emotions in check. No longer did she cry when someone was nice to her. No, instead she grinned at them and thanked them for showing her kindness.

For as much as she had adapted to the new society she was living in, Jane stuck with her roots of hiding away her emotions in a place where no one could see them: internally. Vulnerability stayed behind closed doors. She had everything figured out. That’s what all of the other mothers did, right? ‘If I can even call myself a mother,’ she would chide herself before remembering that she was a mum in this life. Maybe not to Edward like she had hoped, but to her sweet Katherine.

--

It was a known fact that the blonde was the first one to be awake in the house. She liked to see Anna out as she went on her morning run. She basked in the quiet time she and Aragon had before “Hurricane Anne” (Catherine’s words, not hers) came tumbling down the stairs. She liked to have breakfast out on the table by the time Anna would come back from her run- where she would close the door just a bit too loudly and wake up the rest of the house. She absolutely loved seeing all of their sleepy but smiling faces when they saw the love and care that she had put into making breakfast and being able to kiss their foreheads as they gathered at the dining room table. After breakfast was over, she would dance around the house cleaning before preparing for the day’s other work. Clockwork really.

So when one day Jane hadn’t been up and ready to greet Anna before her run and see her off, the fourth queen knocked on her predecessor’s door.

“Seymour?” she called but got no response. Quietly, she opened the door. The blonde, who was clearly awake, turned over in her bed and sighed.

“I’m awake love. What’s up?”

“I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. You’re usually up by the time I’m ready for my morning run.”

“Oh. I’m just fine dear. Just thinking is all. I suppose I got lost in my thoughts. Do you want me to come down and see you out?” The third queen threw her covers off of her body and began to sit up.

“It’s alright,” Cleves shuffled over to the bed awkwardly. “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

“I’m just dandy dear. Go on your run. Breakfast will be ready by the time you get back, I promise.”

“If you just want to hang out, I can forgo my run and make breakfast?”

“Oh no, I wouldn’t put that on you. I can do it. See?” Jane stood from her mattress and smiled a crooked smile- although it wasn’t her typical smile. Her eyes just didn’t light up the way they usually did. “Off you go dear. I’ll see you when you get back.” She pressed a kiss to the red queen’s forehead, much like she did when she was downstairs and watching her friend run out the door. (Anna of Cleves would never admit it, but she was hoping she would get the morning kiss she usually did when she knocked on the door earlier. Not receiving a kiss before heading out the door would just seem wrong.)

--

Breakfast went on just fine, the third queen keeping her promise of having the meal on the table before the fourth queen would return. And then, Jane simply excused herself, asking Cathy to clear off the table instead. Of course every queen noticed the out of character behavior from the third queen. Assuming she was going upstairs to change out of her pajamas (yet another odd thing for the others to see in the morning, for the silver queen was usually out of her pajamas by the time the others had walked down), the other five queens were shocked to see the woman plop herself on the couch and reach for the television remote.

“Is Jane feeling alright?” Cathy asked the fifth queen in a hushed tone as she cleared off the table.

“I- I don’t really know. She seems okay? She made breakfast, right?”

“Yeah, Seymour made breakfast. But, this morning she wasn’t waiting by the front door to watch me leave for my run. She was still in bed,” Cleves threw in.

“That doesn’t sound like Mum,” Kat said worriedly. “Should one of us talk to her?”

“She told me she was fine, but I’m not sure she is,” the red queen admitted.

“Lina, you should talk to her,” Anne suggested. When she got a multitude of reactions from the others, she shrugged. “What? You guys are the two mums of the house? It makes sense that one mum friend would check on the other mum friend.”

“Listen, I’m all for making sure that Jane’s okay,” the first queen paused. “But the last time I did that she quite literally pushed me out of her bedroom. I don’t want to know what will happen again.”

“Okay, what about you Kat?” the green queen proposed.

“I guess I can do it. She’s never been one to lose her cool on me.” It was decided that the youngest queen would try to peek into the soul of her maternal figure. The five finished cleaning up the table before they cleared the room to give Katherine a chance to talk to Jane.

--

“Hey Mum,” the pink haired queen settled down on the couch next to the blonde. “What’re you watching?” When Jane didn’t respond, it was quite clear she wasn’t actually watching whatever show was playing. Lost in thought, the third queen shook her head to herself. “Mum?” Kat tried again, nudging her slightly.

“Hmm,” the silver queen sighed before snapping to. “Oh! Hey Kit. Sorry I guess I just got distracted by uh-” Jane glanced at the television to see what was playing. “-the beautiful house.”

“Yeah,” Kat snorted. “What’s wrong? You seem off today.”

“Nothing’s wrong dear.” Jane fixed her posture and tried to let a smile wash over her face.

“It doesn’t look like nothing. Did something happen?” the fifth queen prodded the blonde in the ribs playfully.

“Nothing has happened. I promise.”

“Well then, what’s wrong?” she asked again.

“Kat, nothing’s wrong. I promise you. I just wanted to watch some television is all.”

“You weren’t even watching it,” the fifth queen pointed out daringly. “Please, just tell me what’s wrong. I want to help you.”

“Katherine Howard Seymour,” Jane’s tone got scarily calm as she took a deep breath. “Nothing is wrong at the moment, but if you ask me that question one more time something is going to be very wrong.”

“Okay fine,” Kat stood from where she was. “Sorry for caring about you I guess.” She sulked away and into her room.

--

Not long after the others went about their days, they heard the small slamming of a door. They could only assume it was Jane or Katherine. Anna, who was particularly close with both women, ventured out of her room and saw Jane’s door was still open, but her other friend’s was shut. Sending a quick text to the other queens, save for Jane (who was still moping on the couch), she entered the room. Soon enough, the others found their way into the light pink room.

“Any word?” Cathy inquired.

“No,” Kat sighed.

“Well, what are we supposed to do?” Anne groaned.

“Just let her be,” Aragon replied. “As much as we all hate when one of us is in a bad mood, we just have to ride it out.”