#i remember not having like but one brown and a few skintones which is why i did the hair blue

[cheswirls]

redraw!! 2014 > 2018

[reanimatedcourier]

How to Write Indigenous Characters Without Looking like a Jackass:

Update as of December 26th, 2020: I have added a couple new sections about naming and legal terms, as well as a bit of reading on the Cherokee Princess phenomenon.

Boozhoo (hello) Fallout fandom! I'm a card-carrying Anishinaabe delivering this rough guide about writing Indigenous characters because wow, do I see a lot of shit.

Let's get something out of the way first: Fallout's portrayal of Indigenous people is racist. From a vague definition of "tribal" to the claims of them being "savage" and "uncivilized" mirror real-world stereotypes used to dehumanize us. Fallout New Vegas' narrated intro has Ron Perlman saying Mr. House "rehabilitated" tribals to create New Vegas' Three Families. You know. Rehabilitate. As if we are animals. Top it off with an erasure of Indigenous people in the American Southwest and no real tribe names, and you've got some pretty shitty representation. The absence of Native American as a race option in the GECK isn't too great, given that two Native characters are marked "Caucasian" despite being brown. Butch Deloria is a pretty well-known example of this effect. (Addendum: Indigenous people can have any mix of dominant and recessive traits, as well as present different phenotypes. What bothers me is it doesn't accommodate us or mixed people, which is another post entirely.)

As a precautionary warning: this post and the sources linked will discuss racism and genocide. There will also be discussion of multiple kinds of abuse.

Now, your best approach will be to pick a nation or tribe and research them. However, what follows will be general references.

Terms that may come up in your research include Aboriginal/Native Canadian, American Indian/Native American, Inuit, Métis, and Mestizo. The latter two refer to cultural groups created after the discovery of the so-called New World. (Addendum made September 5th, 2020: Mestizo has negative connotations and originally meant "half breed" so stick with referring to your mixed Latine and Indigenous characters as mixed Indigenous or simply by the name of their people [Maya, Nahua].)

As a note, not every mixed person is Métis or Mestizo. If you are, say, Serbian and Anishinaabe, you would be mixed, but not Métis (the big M is important here, as it refers to a specific culture). Even the most liberal definition caps off at French and British ancestry alongside Indigenous (some say Scottish and English). Mestizo works the same, since it refers to descendants of Spanish conquistadors/settlers and Indigenous people.

Trouble figuring out whose land is where? No problem, check out this map.

Drawing

Don't draw us with red skin. It's offensive and stereotypical.

Tutorial for Native Skintones

Tutorial for Mixed Native Skintones

Why Many Natives Have Long Hair (this would technically fit better under another category, but give your Native men long hair!)

If You're Including Traditional Wear, Research! It's Out There

Languages

Remember, there are a variety of languages spoken by Indigenous people today. No two tribes will speak the same language, though there are some that are close and may have loan words from each other (Cree and Anishinaabemowin come to mind). Make sure your Diné (you may know them as Navajo) character doesn't start dropping Cree words.

Here's a Site With a Map and Voice Clips

Here's an Extensive List of Amerindian Languages

Keep in mind there are some sounds that have no direct English equivalents. But while we're at it, remember a lot of us speak English, French, Spanish, or Portuguese. The languages of the countries that colonized us.

Words in Amerindian languages tend to be longer than English ones and are in the format of prefix + verb + suffix to get concepts across. Gaawiin miskwaasinoon is a complete sentence in Anishinaabemowin, for example (it is not red).

Names

Surprisingly, we don't have names like Passing Dawn or Two-Bears-High-Fiving in real life. A lot of us have, for lack of better phrasing, white people names. We may have family traditions of passing a name down from generation to generation (I am the fourth person in my maternal line to have my middle name), but not everyone is going to do that. If you do opt for a name from a specific tribe, make sure you haven't chosen a last name from another tribe.

Baby name sites aren't reliable, because most of the names on there will be made up by people who aren't Indigenous. That site does list some notable exceptions and debunks misconceptions.

Here's a list of last names from the American census.

Indian Names

You may also hear "spirit names" because that's what they are for. You know the sort of mystical nature-related name getting slapped on an Indigenous character? Let's dive into that for a moment.

The concept of a spirit name seems to have gotten mistranslated at some point in time. It is the name Creator calls you throughout all your time both here and in the spirit world. These names are given (note the word usage) to you in a ceremony performed by an elder. This is not done lightly.

A lot of imitations of this end up sounding strange because they don't follow traditional guidelines. (I realize this has spread out of the original circle, but Fallout fans may recall other characters in Honest Hearts and mods that do this. They have really weird and racist results.)

If you're not Indigenous: don't try this. You will be wrong.

Legal Terms

Now, sometimes the legal term (or terms) for a tribe may not be what they refer to themselves as. A really great example of this would be the Oceti Sakowin and "Sioux". How did that happen, you might be wondering. Smoky Mountain News has an article about this word and others, including the history of these terms.

For the most accurate information, you are best off having your character refer to themselves by the name their nation uses outside of legislation. A band name would be pretty good for this (Oglala Lakota, for example). I personally refer to myself by my band.

Cowboys

And something the Fallout New Vegas fans might be interested in, cowboys! Here's a link to a post with several books about Black and Indigenous cowboys in the Wild West.

Representation: Stereotypes and Critical Thought

Now, you'll need to think critically about why you want to write your Indigenous character a certain way. Here is a comprehensive post about stereotypes versus nuance.

Familiarize yourself with tropes. The Magical Indian is a pretty prominent one, with lots of shaman-type characters in movies and television shows. This post touches on its sister tropes (The Magical Asian and The Magical Negro), but is primarily about the latter.

Say you want to write an Indigenous woman. Awesome! Characters I love to see. Just make sure you're aware of the stereotypes surrounding her and other Women of Color.

Word to the wise: do not make your Indigenous character an alcoholic. "What, so they can't even drink?" You might be asking. That is not what I'm saying. There is a pervasive stereotype about Drunk Indians, painting a reaction to trauma as an inherent genetic failing, as stated in this piece about Indigenous social worker Jessica Elm's research. The same goes for drugs. Ellen Deloria is an example of this stereotype.

Familiarize yourself with and avoid the Noble Savage trope. This was used to dehumanize us and paint us as "childlike" for the sake of a plot device. It unfortunately persists today.

Casinos are one of the few ways for tribes to make money so they can build homes and maintain roads. However, some are planning on diversifying into other business ventures.

There's a stereotype where we all live off government handouts. Buddy, some of these long-term boil water advisories have been in place for over twenty years. The funding allocated to us as a percentage is 0.39%: less than half a percent to fight the coronavirus. They don't give us money.

"But what about people claiming to be descended from a Cherokee princess?" Cherokee don't and never had anything resembling princesses. White southerners made that up prior to the Civil War. As the article mentions, they fancied themselves "defending their lands as the Indians did".

Also, don't make your Indigenous character a cannibal. Cannibalism is a serious taboo in a lot of our cultures, particularly northern ones.

Our lands are not cursed. We don't have a litany of curses to cast on white people in found footage films. Seriously. We have better things to be doing. Why on earth would our ancestors be haunting you when they could be with their families? Very egotistical assumption.

Indigenous Ties and Blood Quantum

Blood quantum is a colonial system that was initially designed to "breed out the Indian" in people. To dilute our bloodlines until we assimilated properly into white society. NPR has an article on it here.

However, this isn't how a vast majority of us define our identities. What makes us Indigenous is our connections (or reconnection) to our families, tribes, bands, clans, and communities.

Blood quantum has also historically been used to exclude Black Natives from tribal enrollment, given that it was first based on appearance. So, if you looked Black and not the image of "Indian" the white census taker had in his brain, you were excluded and so were your descendants.

Here are two tumblrs that talk about Black Indigenous issues and their perspectives. They also talk about Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people of Australia.

However, if you aren't Indigenous, don't bring up blood quantum. Don't. This is an issue you should not be speaking about.

Cherokee Princess Myth

"Princess" was not a real position in any tribe. The European idea of monarchy did not suddenly manifest somewhere else. The closest probable approximation may have been the daughter of a chief or other politically prominent person. But princess? No.

Here is an article talking about possible origins of this myth. Several things are of note here: women from other tribes may have bee shoved under this label and the idea of a "Cherokee Princess" had been brought up to explain the sudden appearance of a brown-skinned (read: half Black) family member.

For a somewhat more in depth discussion of why, specifically, this myth gets touted around so often, Timeline has this piece.

Religion

Our religions are closed. We are not going to tell you how we worship. Mostly because every little bit we choose to share gets appropriated. Smudging is the most recent example. If you aren't Indigenous, that's smoke cleansing. Smudging is done in a specific way with ceremonies and prayers.

Now, a lot of us were forcibly converted. Every residential school was run by Christians. So plenty of us are Catholic, Baptist, Anglican, Lutheran, etc. Catholicism in Latin America also has influence from the Indigenous religions in that region.

Having your Indigenous character pray or carry rosaries wouldn't be a bad thing, if that religion was important to them. Even if they are atheist, if they lived outside of a reserve or other Indigenous communities, they might have Christian influences due to its domination of the Western world.

Settler Colonialism and the White Savior Trope

Now we've come to our most painful section yet. Fallout unintentionally has an excellent agent of settler-colonialism, in particular the Western Christian European variety, in Caesar's Legion and Joshua Graham.

(Addendum: Honest Hearts is extremely offensive in its portrayal of Indigenous people, and egregiously shows a white man needing to "civilize" tribals and having to teach them basic skills. These skills include cooking, finding safe water, and defending themselves from other tribes.)

Before we dive in, here is a post explaining the concept of cultural Christianity, if you are unfamiliar with it.

We also need to familiarize ourselves with The White Man's Burden. While the poem was written regarding the American-Philippine war, it still captures the attitudes toward Indigenous folks all over the world at the time.

As this article in Teen Vogue points out, white people like to believe they need to save People of Color. You don't need to. People of Color can save themselves.

Now, cultural Christianity isn't alone on this side of the pond. Writer Teju Cole authored a piece on the White Savior Industrial Complex to describe mission trips undertaken by white missionaries to Africa to feed their egos.

Colonialism has always been about the acquisition of wealth. To share a quote from this paper about the ongoing genocide of Indigenous peoples: "Negatively, [settler colonialism] strives for the dissolution of native societies. Positively, it erects a new colonial society on the expropriated land base—as I put it, settler colonizers come to stay: invasion is a structure not an event. In its positive aspect, elimination is an organizing principal of settler-colonial society rather than a one-off (and superseded) occurrence. The positive outcomes of the logic of elimination can include officially encouraged miscegenation, the breaking-down of native title into alienable individual freeholds, native citizenship, child abduction, religious conversion, resocialization in total institutions such as missions or boarding schools, and a whole range of cognate biocultural assimilations. All these strategies, including frontier homicide, are characteristic of settler colonialism. Some of them are more controversial in genocide studies than others." (Positive, here, is referring to "benefits" for the colonizers. Indigenous people don't consider colonization beneficial.)

An example of a non-benefit, the Church Rock disaster had Diné children playing in radioactive water so the company involved could avoid bad publicity.

Moving on, don't sterilize your Indigenous people. Sterilization, particularly when it is done without consent, has long been used as a tool by the white system to prevent "undesirables" (read, People of Color and disabled people) from having children. Somehow, as of 2018, it wasn't officially considered a crime.

The goal of colonization was to eliminate us entirely. Millions died because of exposure to European diseases. Settlers used to and still do separate our children from us for reasons so small as having a dirty dish in the sink. You read that right, a single dirty dish in your kitchen sink was enough to get your children taken and adopted out to white families. This information was told to me by an Indigenous social work student whose name I will keep anonymous.

It wasn't until recently they made amendments to the Indian Act that wouldn't automatically render Indigenous women non-status if they married someone not Indigenous. It also took much too long for Indigenous families to take priority in child placement over white ones. Canada used to adopt Indigenous out to white American families. The source for that statement is further down, but adoption has been used as a tool to destroy cultures.

I am also begging you to cast aside whatever colonialist systems have told you about us. We are alive. People with a past, not people of the past, which was wonderfully said here by Frank Waln.

Topics to Avoid if You Aren't Indigenous

Child Separation. Just don't. We deserve to remain with our families and our communities. Let us stay together and be happy that way.

Assimilation schools. Do not bring up a tool for cultural genocide that has left lasting trauma in our communities.

W/ndigos. I don't care that they're in Fallout 76. They shouldn't be. Besides, you never get them right anyway.

Sk/nwalkers. Absolutely do not. Diné stories are not your playthings either.

I've already talked about drugs and alcohol. Do your research with compassion and empathy in mind. Indigenous people have a lot of pain and generational trauma. You will need to be extremely careful having your Indigenous characters use drugs and alcohol. If your character can be reduced to their (possible) substance abuse issues, you need to step back and rework it. As mentioned in Jessica Elm's research, remember that it isn't inherent to us.

For our final note: remember that we're complex, autonomous human beings. Don't use our deaths to further the stories of your white characters. Don't reduce us to some childlike thing that needs to be raised and civilized by white characters. We interact with society a little differently than you do, but we interact nonetheless.

Meegwetch (thank you) for reading! Remember to do your research and portray us well, but also back off when you are told by an Indigenous person.

This may be updated in the future, it depends on what information I come across or, if other Indigenous people are so inclined, what is added to this post.

[onmykneesforhotdilfs]

Tilt

Bloom smiled as a butler offered her a crystal glass filled with, what she assumed was, very expensive champagne. She nodded gratefully as she took a sip, and then promptly had to physically stop herself from spitting it right back out. Either the champagne wasn’t as good as she expected or officials of Isis simply decided to serve something from the supermarket, while hoping that no one would notice. Then again, Bloom mused, it might just be that my taste buds are so used to the $10 wine so everything fancier just tastes like crap.

She shook her head and crossed her arms underneath the bustier of her skintone, off the shoulder gown with baby blue flowers scattered across the top and sporadically across the skirt as well. The nude color made her appear more tan than she actually was and while the dress was indeed very beautiful, it was just as uncomfortable. Bloom winced as shifting weight from one stiletto clad foot to another sent white hot signal of pain when one of the wires supporting her bustier stabbed her in the ribs. She bit the inside of her cheek to in order to stop herself from simply burning the fabric.

A cheerful laugh of her best friend snapped her out of her trance. Stella emerged from the mass of bodies on the dancefloor, her asymmetrical off shoulder gown highlighting every curve on her body perfectly. Long purple sleeve blended with yellow in a way Bloom didn’t even deem possible considering how different two colors are. Her other arm, that was completely sleeveless, sported some golden jewelry and floor length gown swept the floor elegantly with Stella’s every step. She was holding the same glass, filled with same champagne as Bloom, with her well manicured fingers. As soon as Stella was within arm’s reach, she grabbed Bloom’s elbow and leaned close to her, smile completely disappeared from her face.

“This stuff is absolutely disgusting.” Stella spoke through gritted teeth.

“Oh really?” Bloom asked as smirk slowly rose on her lips. “And here I thought you preferred this,” she lifted a fancy glass into the air, “over my cheap wine.”

“Anything is better than this, for the lack of a better word, crap.” Stella scoffed. “This would’ve never happened on Solaria.” She tilted the glass once again to take a sip in hope it somehow started tasting better but ended up disappointed. Bloom almost laughed at Stella’s expression. “But then again, should I have expected anything more from a planet Diaspro came from?”

Bloom almost winced at the mention of a woman that had the ability to mess up her relationship with Sky like no other. The latest stunt she pulled, thanks to Valtor, only made Bloom more angry at everybody that turned a blind eye to her actions simply because she is a princess. It was only then that the thought occurred to her, that Diaspro might be here and that she might ruin their mission. She glanced nervously around the hall, panicking more the longer she couldn’t find her.

Stella, recognizing Bloom’s ‘two breaths away from having a panic attack' look on her face, was quick to put a calming hand on her shoulder. Bloom recoiled slightly but Stella gripped the flesh lightly in order to ground her. She leaned closer to whisper in Bloom’s ear. “Relax, she’s not here. Apparently her parents don’t allow her to go to events where his highness, prince Sky of Eraklyon, might be present.”

Sarcasm was obvious in Stella’s voice but it served the purpose of calming Bloom to the point where she actually start thinking lucidly again.

Bloom took a deep breath as her shoulders slouched slightly forward. “Thank you.” She whispered to Stella. Then, the actual sentences Stella was saying caught up to her and her eyebrows touched her hairline in obvious amusement. “Still angry at Sky I see?”

Stella snorted and wrinkled her nose at the mention of Sky’s name. “If you were smarter, you’d be angry too.”

“Hey!” Bloom yelped angrily but settled down quickly as she looked away. “I am angry at him.”

“Apparently not enough.” Stella gripped the glass so hard her knuckles turned white. “I mean, what’s up with him suddenly becoming a poster boy and actually listening to what his daddy says?”

“Well, technically, Sky’s meeting with Diaspro or her parents might cause interplanetary scandal between Eraklyon and Isis.” Bloom spoke in Techna's voice.

Stella’s lip twitched. “Still, interplanetary scandal or a potential threat of one never actually stopped him from going against orders before. So my question still remains.”

“Any sign of Valtor?” Bloom asked, hoping to divert the route of conversation.

“I just spoke to Techna. He hasn’t been detected and Amplificarum is still safely locked in the vault.”

“He’ll show up eventually.” Bloom nodded absentmindedly. “He always does.”

“See this, this right here,” Stella pointed to the marble floor and Bloom lowered her gaze to the direction her finger was indicating but furrowed her brows when she found nothing. “This is why Sky should be here.” Bloom’s lips shaped into a thin line whe she realized what she was talking about as Stella continued to rant. “Isn’t he concerned that Valtor might attack and something might happen to you?”

Bloom gasped. “I’m not some… damsel in distress that needs saving Stella!” She scoffed. “I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.

“C’mon Bloom, don’t give me that.”

“Well what do you want me to say Stell? That I’m angry? Disappointed? Fine. I’m disappointed that Sky chose to follow the order from his father when I wanted him to come with me. He most certainly could've found another solution but he did nothing. Instead he left me to face, potentially Diaspro and Valtor alone. There! Was that enough? Are you happy now?” Bloom’s cheeks were red by the time she finished her rant as her chest continued rising up and down in order to return much needed oxygen into her lungs, her exhaustion more due to stress than the actual rant.

Stella smiled and patted Bloom on the shoulder. “There you go. Now was that so hard to say?”

“What?”

“Nevermind that, anyway, be sure to tell him that next time, ok?”

Bloom rolled her eyes but a smile threatened to spread on her face. “You’re unbelievable.”

“Mhm, that’s why you love me so much.” Stella spoke with an obvious pride evident in her voice.

“Yeah, let’s just say you’re lucky I do.” Bloom shook her head and grabbed Stella’s elbow as she spotted a familiar short brown hair emerging from the crowd. “There’s Brandon.” She turned to Stella and pointed to where she saw him. “Go bother him for a while.”

Stella pouted and stuck her tongue out playfully at Bloom but strutted off towards her boyfriend, leaving Bloom alone.

With Stella gone, all of Bloom’s physical discomfort came rushing back and hitting her like a rogue train. Her feet ached, her head started hurting from the tight updo and she was pretty sure the wire that poked her in the ribs has punctured her skin. She felt the tender area with her opposite hand as much as she dared and exhaled short puff of air when she found nothing. She wanted to sit down or maybe even lay down and then not move for a few days.

She shook her head and took a sip of her disgusting drink in order to wake herself up. She looked around the dancefloor, automatically finding Stella and Brandon as they swayed to the rhythm. Techna and Timmy were huddled in the corner probably discussing something about technology. Musa and Riven were also in the corner, be it on the opposite side from Techna, which greatly surprised Bloom because Musa was more often than not first on the dancefloor alongside Layla (though club suited them more, but the two always found a way to fit in anywhere), but right now dancefloor seemed like the last place Musa wanted to be. Instead, fairy of music was busy glaring daggers at her boyfriend that seemed to pay little to no attention to them.

Bloom rolled her eyes at the two of them (not that her and Sky were any better) and focused on finding Layla that also, surprisingly, decided to go solo on this mission. She found her talking to some Isis official that she probably knew due to her status. With Layla’s position in mind, bloom turned to finding the last couple but Flora and Helia were nowhere to be found so Bloom assumed they were probably taking a stroll in the garden.

With those in mind, Bloom once again diverted her eyes from the dancefloor and looked at the champagne bubbling in her glass as her thoughts ran over the information she remembered about Amplificarum.

Apparently, the green stone, by physical appearance almost indistinguishable from emerald, had the power to magnify any spells or beams aimed at something. Or someone, Bloom thought. It was most commonly used for protection spells and it generally wasn’t meant for offensive spellwork. Bloom somehow had doubts Valtor will use it for protection spells. The sheer thought of chaos that could potentially happen if such artifact ever fell into Valtor’s, or anyone’s wrong hands, made Bloom shudder all over and grip her champagne glass bit tighter. That can never be allowed to happen. It’s why you’re here. There’s no way he will be able to slip in and out undetected with eleven pairs of eyes looking for him.

Bloom couldn’t deny that Valtor is the most powerful, and quite frankly the most cunning, villain they ever had the pleasure of meeting. What irked her to the point of madness, however, was the fact that Valtor always seemed to be one step ahead of them.

The battles are like chess game. Daphne’s voice sounded in her head. In order to defeat your opponent you have to figure out their strategy. You have to master the art of reading their moves and find a way to turn the odds in your favor.

It was not hard to guess who played certain roles in this game though. She was an amateur, an amateur that was loosing valuable chess pieces battle after battle whereas Valtor was a professional that suffered minor losses here and there but still had the most prized figurines in the game. It didn’t take a professional chess player to see that the odds were most definitely not in Bloom’s favor.

He’ll slip sooner or later. Bloom thought with a smile. Even Valtor can make a mistake. And it takes only a second, a slip of concentration, a lapse in judgment and the board will tilt in our direction. Even an amateur can get lucky and stometimes, the pawn can be the most powerful piece capable of settling the final score, so don’t sell yourself short.

Bloom was so distracted by her mental pep talk that she failed to notice one of the guests approach.

“This stuff they’re serving us,” Bloom jumped as a deep melodic voice rang out next to her. “it’s not something I expected from Isis royal court.”

The stranger came to stand almost arm to arm with her, but she also noticed she was almost two heads shorter than him.

“In a good, or a bad way?” Bloom asked with a frown. The stranger has short brown hair styled to a perfection, not even a hair out of place. From what she could see from the side without being too obvious, she noticed he had perfectly straight nose and an overall boyish appearance.

The stranger lifted one of his eyebrows curiously. “Have you tried that?” He pointed to her glass.

“Yes.”

“And how does it taste?”

“Like a hair conditioner.”

He nodded approvingly. “Interesting comparison. Not inaccurate though. Well Miss, I think you just answered your own question.”

Despite all odds, Bloom found herself smiling at stranger’s antics and clever quips. “I am sorry but I don’t think I got your name.”

“That’s because I didn’t give it to you.”

Okay, rude.

“Well,” she forced out, “would you be so kind to give me your name then?” Bloom really hoped her smile was more convincing than her words.

“There’s no need, Bloom. You already know my name.” Bloom’s smile vanished as the man finally turned to face her, the unique icy colored eyes she only saw on one particular individual looking straight into her wider-than-dinnerplates blue ones. She felt a bead of sweat roll down the thin column of her neck and disappear into her cleavage.

Bloom gulped.

Valtor smirked.

“You!” was the only thing that came out of her mouth.

He shook his head, his eyebrows set in a frown as he let out a disappointed huff. “That is not my name princess. You might wish to try again.”

“What are you doing here, Valtor?” Bloom managed through gritted teeth.

“Oh so you do remember.” Valtor smirked like the cat who got all the cream. “Good. Otherwise I would have to remind you and I really don’t want to spoil anyone’s evening.”

“As if you need me, or anyone, for that!” Bloom whisper-yelled as her eyes darted desperately across the room, trying to locate her team.

“Now now,” Valtor cooed, “it is not polite to look away from the person you’re having a conversation with, Bloom. Someone should’ve taught you proper manners.”

Bloom gasped as she felt the dragon fire raging in her chest, the effect much more intense than she’s ever experienced before. She swayed slightly on her feet and she raised her unoccupied arm to clutch lightly at her chest. The world was spinning in front of her eyes and just as she feared she might topple over, one of Valtor’s large hands grasped her bicep and the forest fire that burned in her turned into smoldering ashes.

Bloom leaned slightly on her side, Valtor’s arm acting like an anchor as she fought to regain her breath.

“What,” she rasped out, her voice hoarse like she just inhaled smoke, “was that?”

“Just a reminder that you should not antagonize me.” Valtor’s voice was cold and sharp and it made her swallow down a snarky response.

“Is that how you snuck past Techna and me?” The pain was gone but her legs still felt wobbly and she was forced to hold onto Valtor in order to remain standing. “A cloaking spell?”

“If the shoe fits…” he trailed off as Bloom stood up to her full height but despite the heels she wore, Valtor noted with a slight amusement, only managed to reach his shoulders. The glare princess of Domino sent him would make a lesser man run to his mom but it only made Valtor grin. Bloom ripped her arm from his grasp and he had to bite his lip to stifle a chuckle that threatened to escape as Bloom stumbled slightly when he willingly let her go.

Bloom mumbled something that even his heighten senses couldn’t pick up. “I apologize darling, I didn’t quite catch that. Would you mind repeating it?”

“I said that if you turn around and bend over, I’ll show you where my shoe fits.”

Valtor was in stupor for a minute, but then a surprised chuckle broke through his lips and his shoulders started shaking from the laughter he tried, and was slowly failing at, keeping contained. “Oh, and she bites.”

Valtor continued laughing sporadically, stopping for a few moments only to start up again. The lines around his eyes crinkled and Bloom found herself fascinated by how melodic and pleasant his laugh sounded. The thought only lasted for a few seconds before Bloom stomped on it with a part of her brain that was still capable of making rational thoughts. Get it together, Bloom.

“If you’re quite done,” Bloom spoke, her cheeks red from rather unorthodox behavior she exhibited few minutes ago, “how about you tell me what are you doing here, finally?”

“I think you know why I’m here.”

“Forget it, you’re not getting it!” She turned to face him fully, her eyes boring a hole into the side of his head.

Valtor lifted his eyebrows as if to say ‘Really?’, mockery clear in his eyes. “Are you going to stop me?”

Bloom nodded. “I am.”

Valtor shook his head, smile on his face, amused by her confident tone. She thinks she’s a match for me. Silly girl. He was just about to tell her as much when the music that played as more of a background noise, suddenly became louder, loud to the point it drowned out all the chatter in the room.

Bloom almost jumped out of her skin when the orchestra started playing, loudly. She flinched, however, when she once again felt Valtor’s huge hand on her body. This time his palm was not in a direct contact with her skin but the unusual placement of the said appendage caused her to panic. His hand landed on the small of her back and it was quite persistently pushing her forward, straight onto the dancefloor between other couples.

“What do you think you’re doing?” She hissed through clenched teeth, sparks flaring at her fingertips, beginnings of an offensive spell already forming on her vocal cords.

“We are dancing.” His calm voice only made her more angry and she started struggling against the force pushing her forward.

“I don’t want to dance. Let me go.”

He stopped just short of the line separating area designed for dancing and bowed down theatrically while offering his hand to her. “May I have this dance, Miss?”

Few people closest to them turned around at the sound of his voice and Bloom had to bite her tongue to resist the urge to claw his eyes out. “No, you can’t!” She huffed out quietly instead, her neck and cheeks turning red from anger. “I told you, I don’t want to dance and I most certainly do not want to dance with the likes of you!"

“You wound me princess, truly. I don’t bite… not unless you want me to, of course.”

Bloom’s nostrils flared and flames began to dance in her eyes. What insolence.

“Let’s make a deal, princess of Domino.” He interrupted her just as smoke was about to start coming out of her ears. “You let me have this dance, and I’ll tell you everything you wish to know and I promise to tell the truth.”

“Why should I trust you?” She raised her eyebrows but it was obvious she was interested.

“You shouldn’t.” He tilted his head to the side as smile stretched across his lips. “But that never stopped you before.”

Sea blue met the arctic ice. A spark erupted and the coldness of his gaze melted away. “I give you my word.” His hand was still hovering in the air, his palm opened in invitation as he tilted his head in the direction of the dancefloor.

Bloom weighed her options. For as far as she knew, this could be another one of Valtor’s tricks to gain the information from her instead of vice versa. But the burning questions only he had the answers to kept pressing on the part of her brain that was telling her how much of a madness this was. Bloom sighed. Her hand rose hesitantly and slowly took hold of Valtor’s.

“One dance. That’s all you get.”

“That’s all I’ll need.”

He gripped Bloom’s fingers bit tighter as he lead her into the classic pose with his unoccupied hand placed on her lower back, lower than socially accepted when dancing with someone you do not know, but still in the safe zone that didn’t ask for Bloom to knee him in the balls. His other hand loosened around her fingers and now gently supported her palm. Instead of placing her other arm on Valtor’s shoulder, Bloom gripped one side of her skirt so she could move freely and to minimize contact. He looked down , searching her face, but Bloom turned her head in the opposite direction.

Valtor was never the one to blatantly display his emotions but Bloom’s refusal to look him in the eyes was one thing that almost made him boil. He didn’t know why the daughter of those that defeated him had such effect on him and he didn’t like it. He hated not knowing what was running through her head, especially in the place where he was in an obvious disadvantage concerning numbers of the two opposing teams. During his careful observation, he counted eleven of them, and there was only one of him. Not like any of them actually pose any threat, he mused. The only one that is able to even remotely challenge me is the one I’m dancing with and from this proximity she can be easily taken care of. He studied her posture, how her eyes avoided his at all cost, how her back stood stiff like someone stuck a pole to her spine, how tightly she gripped her skirt as he moved with her elegantly. It was obvious she was not enjoying this. Well then, let’s make you even more uncomfortable.

Without warning, Valtor pulled Bloom closer to his body, upper body completely pressed against hers, one of his legs between both of hers as her head snapped up to look at his cheeky smile. Fire was blazing in her eyes but Valtor didn’t care. He thrived on her reactions. Bloom squeezed the hand that was holding hers in warning but Valtor only gripped the flesh of her hip in response. Devils were dancing in his eyes but to Bloom they looked alive for the first time. Gone was the icy look capable of making even the best trained soldier hesitate before rushing into the battle against him.

He’s genuinely amused by this. She thought. If only be wasn’t having fun at my expense, I might’ve let it slide. Valtor twirled her around other dancing couples, his graceful steps never flattering, and it occurred to Bloom for the first time that she actually didn’t step on his toes even once.

“How are you doing this?” She asked him as he swung her away from himself, only to bring her in again, her back to his front, both of his hands gripping her hips. In her peripheral vision, she saw him rise his eyebrow. “I’ve never been good at dancing.”

Valtor smirked. “Perhaps you’ve never had a good enough partner.”

Judging by the tone of his voice, he was mocking Sky openly so Bloom miscalculated and stepped with the heel of her foot onto his polished shoe. She heard him grunt as, what she assumed was a curse, left his mouth. She smiled. If you play with fire, you’re gonna get burned.

“What happened to my parents?” Her next question made him quirk an eyebrow and she saw his eyes widen for a second before he regained his bearings.

“What did Faragonda tell you?” He answered her questions with one of his own and that made her irrationally angry for some reason.

“I asked you first.” She bit her tongue before insults started spewing out of her mouth. She realized long ago that snarky comments only made him more angry so she wasn’t willing to risk her one chance. “Answer me.”

“Do you think you are in position to demand anything, heiress of the lost kingdom?” Anger was starting to creep up in his voice as he dipped her low and snapped her back up harsher than necessary.

Bloom gasped as she suddenly found herself in an almost horizontal position. “You promised.”

Valtor assumed their previous position, except this time he lowered his head so his breath would graze her neck when he spoke. He sighed and goosebumps rose on Bloom’s skin as his hot breath washed over her collarbones and sternum.

“The truth is, I do not know what happened to your parents. I was imprisoned before the final battle. As far as I’m aware, ancient witches were the last to see them.”

Bloom swallowed. “That’s not Faragonda’s version.”

Valtor laughed, though his laugh was somehow bitter. “And you, as a good fairy, believe everything that your headmistress says don’t you?”

“And who am I supposed to trust? You?”

“Have you ever wondered why,” he repositioned her hand slightly as he side stepped to avoid the couple that was directly on a collision course with them. The sudden movement made the lock of Bloom’s hair wiggle out of her bun. “your headmistress send bunch of barely legal girls to suicide missions against the powerful enemies such as myself?”

“Because she trusts us?”

“Because she has an underlying motive.” He continued when Bloom scoffed. “Think about it. Can you honestly tell me your headmistress provides you with all the available information before she sends you off into battles?”

His question made her think of all the times Faragonda withheld the valuable information because she deemed it necessary and she bit her lip as realization hit her. “That doesn’t make her evil.”

“I never said it made her evil.” Smirk once again climbed on her face. “She’s cunning alright, but not cunning enough to be considered evil.”

“What’s her underlying motive according to your expertise?”

He shrugged carelessly. “Everybody needs someone to do their dirty work.”

“Like you have Trix?” Bloom raised her eyebrows in question.

“Don’t remind me.” He groaned. “Those three are as incompetent as they get.”

They danced in surprisingly comfortable silence for a few seconds, Valtor’s capable hands leading them. “You never answered my question.” Bloom said.

“What question?”

“How are you doing this?” She tilted her head slightly to their intertwined hands.

The edge of Valtor’s lips turned upwards. “You know how I’m doing it.”

Bloom frowned in confusion. “No, I actually really don’t.”

“Yes you do.” She was about to open her mouth to protest and to ask him what the hell he’s playing at, but he was faster than her. “You just have to let yourself feel it.”

Bloom’s shoulders tensed as the feeling of her native fire burning spread across her whole body. Okay, this is new.

“Pretty impressive, don’t you think?”

Bloom locked eyes with Valtor as he bent slightly in the knees, his hands gripped her hips tightly and her hands automatically came to rest on his broad shoulders, as he lifted her up and then, with care she didn’t know he was capable of, lowered her back to the ground. There was something hypnotic about his eyes and Bloom found herself unable to look away as she fought to regain her breath once her feet touched the ground again.

Whatever moment they shared was interrupted by a horrendous sound of alarm blaring and all the lights going off at the same time as explosion sounded somewhere above them. Valtor smirked as Bloom recoiled from him as if he burned her. Her hands lit on fire as people started screaming around her and moving away from them.

Valtor could hear Bloom’s friends calling her name as they pushed through the crowd of panicked guests.

“This was your plan all along, wasn’t it!?” Anger was obvious in her eyes and Valtor found himself fascinated as the fiery glow from her hands reflected in her irises. What he would do to have her on his side.

He shook himself out of his stupor as he snapped his fingers, letting his disguise slip off. Short brown hair and boyish look was replaced by long strawberry blond hair and his face morphed back into high cheekbones and sharp jaw. “I would love to continue our conversation,” he raised his arm and shot blindly towards the ceiling, blowing a huge hole into it. “however, I believe that my time has run out.”

Distant flashes lit up and Winx finally emerged from the crowd, sparkly outfits and huge wings on point. Bloom was the only one that remained in her normal attire, her hands showing no sign of burning out anytime soon, as she kept shooting daggers at Valtor with her eyes.

“It’s a shame I wasn’t able to answer more of your questions, Bloom. But I don’t think this is our last meeting.” Valtor grinned, thirty two pearly white teeth on display. “Besides,” he drawled as Icy flew from the direction of the vault Amplificarum was locked in, green gem standing out against the pale skin of her hand. “you know where to find me.”

“Solar energy!” Stella’s arm shot up, spell hurtling straight towards Valtor, but he didn’t even bat an eyelash as his hand rose to absorb the spell.

“Stop in the name of the law!” Armed soldiers and specialists started breaking through, their weapons and swords drawn and ready for a fight.

Valtor’s laugh echoed in the room as he shot off towards the hole in the ceiling, his mouth reciting the spell Bloom was quite familiar with. “Have the taste of your own medicine, princess of Solaria.”

Bloom barely had time to put up a shield as Stella’s own amplified spell was hurled back to them, painting the whole room in white hot glow, forcing everyone to close their eyes so they don’t go blind.

When Bloom finally gathered enough strength to open her eyes, Valtor was nowhere to be seen and people, specialists, guards and her team were slowly climbing back on their feet. Remnants of Stella’s spell still lingered in the air, making the room uncomfortably bright and forcing Bloom to squint.

“He did it again.” Stella spoke next to her and Bloom nodded absentmindedly as Stella continued looking around. “He used a heightened version of my spell… it’s a miracle no one’s been hurt.”

Bloom shook her head. “I don’t think he meant to hurt anyone Stell. He obviously needed a distraction to get away.”

“He doesn’t want unnecessary pain and destruction… you told me that’s what he said to you on Andros.”

Bloom nodded. “I think he managed to fulfill his promise, for once.”

Bloom looked up where Valtor made his exit and couldn’t help but to think that the chessboard once again tilted in his favor.

[kessielrg]

[Kingdom Hearts] Shutter to Stutter

Summary: By far, Ven’s got the most boring job at the flower shop; the cashier. Sitting day in and day out for someone to browse along the rows of flowers and gardening tools, then probably walk right out again. Sometimes an interesting thing would happen- but they were few and far between. [flower shop AU focused on UX kids][Part 8 in a series of oneshots][VenxOC][EphemerxOC/F!Player] 

Rating: K+ (mild cursing)

Word Count: 2,062 words

If you liked this story, please reblog!

---

Ven couldn’t remember the last time the flower shop had this much activity to it. At least, in terms of what they did for their billboard ads. Most of the time it was some seasonal flower with witty text advertising the store. Apparently this time, someone had requested something a bit more ‘personal.’ Which meant that they needed models this time around. Sabrina was a shoo-in; her face more than once gracing the billboard on I-02. But this time Luca was also being brought in. The two were to pose as if Luca was giving Sabrina a sunflower, and at the moment, the toddler wanted to do anything but.

It probably would have helped if the space wasn’t so overwhelming. Literally everyone was here. Lauriam had gotten a full camera set up- two large lights, a tripod, and his DSLR he usually used for some horticulture club he was in. Brain was his assistant, of a sorts, helping with adjusting the lights every now and again. Strelitzia -and surprisingly, Elrena- was there to do Sabrina’s make up for her. (Luca had been lucky to have Anora’s darker skintone, leading him to not be as washed out as the paler Sabrina.) Since their child was being exploited, of course both Ephemer and Anora were there to coax him to cooperate. And then there was Skuld- pretty much directing everyone, and likely not helping in Luca’s resistance.

No one had really asked Ven to help with this project, so he sat behind his counter to continue being invisible. Although he did wonder- was he still getting paid for this even though he wasn’t directly helping? This was still his normal shift, after all.

“Luca, look here.” Ephemer coaxed his child from behind Sabrina. “Look over here!”

Luca refused to acknowledge his parent. Instead he made do with picking off the petals on the sunflower with rather impressive pinches. It was less impressive when a strand of the toddler’s hair got into his face, and he used his whole hand to wipe it away. He didn’t even bother to look up when Anora started to shake what Ven could only assume was Luca’s favorite toy. The poor thing rattled not far from Sabrina’s face. No envy was lost as Sabrina’s face grew incredibly dark at the annoyance of having Ephemer verbally calling his son, while Anora rattled a toy on the other side. At this point, even if they could get Luca to remotely look Sabrina’s way, it was going to take another five minutes for her to look close to pleased again.

Brain knew his sister was pushing her limit because he gently pushed his way over to Skuld just to suggest, “Maybe we should try something different?”

Skuld looked at him like he gained another head.

“No.” she said to him with a shake of her head.

“So you want Wabi-Sabi to go Hulk when Ephemer calls for Luca again?”

“She’ll be fine.” Skuld snapped. To further prove a point, Skuld shouted at Sabrina, “Sabrina! You’re doing fine with Ephemer and Anora behind you, aren't you?”

Sabrina gave Skuld a glare so dark, it sent a chill up everyone’s (or, at least the people who happened to be looking at her at the time) spine. Skuld didn’t seem phased.

“Hey Sabrina,” Lauriam then spoke up from behind his camera. “Can you look over here for a moment? Cross your legs a bit too?”

Hate turning into an expression of mild confusion, Sabrina turned her body a bit to better face Lauriam. She crossed her legs and sat a bit straighter. Lauriam checked his camera’s viewfinder for a moment before several shutter snaps could be heard.

“Perfect.” Lauriam nodded. “Thank you.”

“Lauriam, stop taking boudoir photographs of my sister.” Brain teased as he went back over.

Lauriam actually looked rather offended at the idea. “I'm pretty sure these photos are taking themselves, Brain.” he informed his coworker. “My finger's not even on the trigger.”

“You have a remote.” Brain nonchalantly pointed out.

“Do I?” Lauriam looked down at his hand. Sure enough, there was a remote there. He looked up at Sabrina who was trying to scoot Luca back so they could maintain the agreed distance. Lauriam didn’t look away as he took another photograph, using the remote to trigger the shutter. He once more looked down at his hand in wonder before saying, “So I do.”

The duo shared a hearty laugh. The sound irking Sabrina’s nerves again as she also gave them a death glare. She was perfectly ignored for the time being. Every now and again, Lauriam still pressed the shutter button on the remote, even if nothing of substantial use was going on. He was going to end up with a lot of junk photos later, but he had always preferred to overshoot for that reason. If none of them had the particular vision Skuld was looking for, then surely there would be something that could suffice. There had to be.

Meanwhile, sitting by the main counter where Ventus was trying not to be seen, was Strelitzia and Elrena. Strelitzia was humming a little tune to herself as she watched over the main chaos.

“I wonder why Luca isn’t paying that much attention to Ephemer or Anora.” she casually wondered, placing a hand against her cheek. “He’s usually so attentive when they’re around.”

“Humph.” Elrena grumbled. “You know what they say, just like with dogs and cats; babies can sense evil.”

“Explains why he won't go near you.” Ventus hissed under his breath.

Both girls immediately looked at Ven- Strelitzia looked partially amused, while Elrena’s face could almost rival how irate Sabrina was. Elrena immediately slammed her hand down on the counter.

“Listen here, Roxas,” Elrena said, emphasizing the wrong name because she knew he didn’t like it, “I don’t know what’s gotten into you recently, but I’m not liking this bold streak you think you have going on. It’s not impressing anyone.”

“You wanna bet?”

Ventus, Elrena, and Strelitzia all turned their attention to Sabrina. She was sitting up straight and giving Elrena a particularly hard glare. Every other sound in the flower shop came to a grinding stop. (Spare for a few camera clicks, but at this point it was out of habit.) Seeing Sabrina defend Ventus made Elrena laugh.

“And what are you going to do?” Elrena challenged.

“Elrena.” Lauriam warned. She just as easily ignored him.

“‘Oh, look at me, Miss Independent.’” Elrena taunted. “‘I don’t care about anyone until I suddenly do. Oh, woe is me, being a cold hearted bi- I mean, witch, there’s a child present, I suppose- is just exhausting. It’s everyone else’s fault but mine. Oh woe!’”

Sabrina got up from her spot so quick, Brain nearly tripped over Lauriam’s tripod just to make sure his sister didn’t go straight for Elrena’s face. But she didn’t have thoughts of smashing the electric blonde’s face in just yet. Strelitzia had moved just as fast to take hold of Elrena’s elbow. Her grip was tight- a nonverbal warning that her friend needed to dial it back soon. But the shots had been fired, and neither one of them were going to let it go unattended.

“Brain, let go of my arm.” Sabrina hissed to her brother, not letting her gaze waver from Elrena. “You guys can keep going with the photoshoot, but there’s something I need to tell her a bit more privately.”

“You’re not leaving the shop to do it.” Brain told her.

“Of course not.” she spat- perfectly paired with a roll of her eyes.

“Luca will probably sit still for the camera better with her gone too.” Skuld spoke up, as if she wanted to remind everyone on why they were here today. “Lauriam, can you make it happen?”

“Of course.” he agreed. He took a look at his sister, giving her a stern glare meant to communicate that she needed to leave with Elrena soon. Strelitzia’s face paled a bit, but she gave a nod to show she understood.

With that, Brain let go of Sabrina’s arm. She very carefully walked around the photography junk to stand right in front of Elrena. Ventus could feel the air on the back of his neck stand up. There was a fury in Sabrina’s eye that he couldn’t tell if he admired or feared. He would have left to further give the girls time alone, but something kept him rooted in his spot. Everyone else returned to trying to take a good picture of Luca holding up a flower.

“You know, Elrena,” Sabrina started to say, “We’re a lot alike- you and I.”

Hearing this, Elrena stood a bit straighter. Ven tried to hold back the urge to shout that they weren’t. Sabrina gave them enough time to consider the idea before she continued.

“We’re both rather harsh to people we don’t like. Quite frankly, I don’t think we have ever liked each other. Sometimes, it’s very gratifying in just watching the world burn. You know what I mean?”

“Pssht. Yeah.” Elrena snorted. “Some people just deserve it.”

“And that’s where we differ.” Sabrina mused, taking another step toward Elrena. “You keep hiding. You keep hiding every little thing until you’re desperate. It’s not even a matter of holding your cards close- you literally can not let anyone in. People always ask who hurt me, but do they ask the same about you? I know where I fucked up in life, but do you? At least I’m able to admit that I like the person standing two feet away from me. By way, Ven? Last week? That was my first kiss. Great job.”

Ven immediately looked down, his face flushing a deep red. The black haired, brown eyed bitch smirked at the reaction. It became malicious when she looked back at Elrena.

“Have you kissed the person standing two feet next to you yet, sweetie?” She turned to look Strelitzia dead in the eye before asking, “Has she?”

For a moment, Strelitzia didn’t know how to respond. “Elrena doesn’t…” she tried to say, but she wandered in looking at Elrena’s face. The electric blonde’s face was a shade of red that it rivaled the ripest of apples.

“You- you just can’t say that!” Elrena spat. “You don’t know-”

“I may hate people, but I know them. But if I’m wrong, then kiss her.”

Elrena looked like she wanted to throw up.

“S-Strelitzia,” she then stammered. “We need to go now. You’re my ride home.”

“Yeah…” Strelitzia slowly nodded. “Let’s go.”

Strelitzia started toward the front door without a second thought. She paused at Lauriam to tell him something, (something he did not look pleased about at all) before leaving the building altogether. Elrena remained in a deadlock with Sabrina.

“You’re a bitch.” she told the dark haired girl.

“Have to be,” the reply came, almost as pure and simple as day. “How else will the person I like know I actually do like them?”

Elrena pursed her lips together. She tried to storm out, but the attempt still seemed rather half hearted at best. Sabrina casually watched her leave as she leaned against the counter. She refused to look at Lauriam. She knew he was giving her a heated glare.

Ven leaned forward on the counter just to whisper at her, “You’re insane.”

Sabrina moved enough to give him an over the shoulder stare.

“And yet, you’re the one that kissed me.” she mused, rather triumphantly. “Guess that makes you just as bad.”

“It was one kiss.” Ven tried to say in his defense. “Didn’t have to mean anything.”

“No, no it didn’t.” Sabrina quietly mumbled. She got off the counter and took her spot back in front of the camera equipment. Her expression was hard as she told her brother that things were fine. She even told Lauriam that she didn’t mean to put Strelitzia on the spot. But then she went back to modeling like nothing had ever happened. Right down to being slightly annoyed at the parents on either side of her trying to get their kid’s attention.

Ventus hummed as he rested an elbow on the counter, then cupped his face into his hand. Only one thought entered his head as he watched the photoshoot, and it was one that sent butterflies to his stomach.

She is amazing.

[straychesire]

Sage & Lavender

Dreamcatcher’s Dami x Female Reader

It all started because you couldn’t. sleep. A concoction of stress, anxiety, with a dash of intermittent insomnia made it particularly challenging to get rest. It didn’t help that you were having several challenges at work: new co-workers that were determined to get you into trouble, your boss going through a divorce (which made him especially irritated), and a new software in which made no logical sense whatsoever. 

The culmination of all of that nearly brought you to your breaking point - which is when you noticed the odd little shop near your work: Avalon. The building was an old home and looked a bit rustic, with a somewhat mystical quality to it. Various glass bottles were hung from the tree beside the entrance, catching the resting sun’s last light and reflecting it all over the ground. You stood outside for what felt like several minutes before finally ascending the rickety few steps and pulling the door open; a soft bell announced your presence, giving a soothing tinkle.

The first room was filled with nicknacks of various cultures and religions. A red tapestry featuring a golden dragon seemed to pull you in, it’s eyes boring into your soul. It appeared to be a traditional Chinese dragon. You couldn’t help but run a few delicate fingertips over the fabric, feeling the bumps of thread beneath your touch. Several statues of golden Buddhas from different Asian countries sat on a shelf to the right of the tapestry, each a different size.

You spun on your heels, slow and entranced as you took in the organized clutter of the space. A few maneki-neko sat in a corner of the room, their cute little paws raised in the air - a corner which you quickly deemed the “cat corner”. There were handmade bags pilled up on a shelf, along with pillows (that you assumed were used for meditation, based on their style and orientation) along with clothing lined the other wall. 

You stepped through the doorway, pushing aside the beaded curtain, met with a giant room covered in crystals and gemstones. You noted a couple doorways on the left-side of the room, but your focus seemed to be being pulled by an unnamed force that led you straight to an old fireplace. Various crystal balls adorned the mantle, but one in particular caught your attention: it was light pink in color, maybe four or five inches in diameter. It sat upon a gold holder, with four legs that resembled an old claw-foot bathtub.

“Can I help you with anything?”

The voice made you jump, your hand flying up to press against your beating heart. The employee stood beside you, her hands clasped behind her back as she made eye-contact with you. She didn’t seem fazed at all by your dramatics, which helped you calm down quicker than you would have. 

“Um, actually,” you smoothed your hands down your shirt, tugging on the hem as you cleared your throat, “...yes.”

The woman simply raised an eyebrow, signaling for you to continue. That small action effected you more than you’d like to admit. 

“I’ve been having a hard time sleeping? I’ve tried, you know, drinking tea before bed and the sounds of the ocean and all that, but none of it’s worked.” You hugged yourself, absentmindedly tapping your right thumb against your upper arm. “Do you...have anything that could possibly help?”

“Are nightmares your trouble? Or is it other things, such as stress and listlessness?”

“No nightmares. Mostly stress.” Your body heaved when you gave a great sigh. “Some bouts of insomnia, but that seems to only happen when I’m extremely stressed.” 

She nodded, swiftly moving over to the many baskets that held crystals of all shapes, sizes, and colors. The first stone she grabbed was lavender in color, maybe half an inch long and imperfect in shape. She held her hand out, asking for your own. Admittedly, you felt your heart beat a little faster as you place your hand into hers. You took in the sight of her slender fingers, short nails coated with a nude nail polish that nearly matched her skintone. Her movements were swift as she flipped your hand around so the back of yours pressed against the palm of hers. She pressed the smooth, cool stone into your open palm.

“Lepidolite. It’s the ideal stone for tackling sleep issues. Among other things, this stone will help calm your mind and ease any stress. You can put it on your bedside table, or even place it beneath your pillow for maximum effectiveness.” You nodded, pulling your gaze from the small stone to the employee’s eyes. You were taken aback to find that she was already looking at you - her intense eyes nearly sending you into a trance.

She reached down, picking up something that your ignorant self deemed to be quartz. It was smooth, bewitchingly so. The low light danced off of the surface giving the appearance that it was glittering. The stone was a few inches in length, and appeared more like a pillar. It was also pressed into your hand, reaching from the bottom of your palm to the bottoms of your fingers.

“Selenite. This will help your mind calm even more and become more clear. Use this wand before you sleep: take a moment to breathe, dragging the wand through the air in front of you from the top of your head to your core. Doing this will pass the crystal over your chakras and will help bring clarity.” She gave you the smallest of smiles. “If you have a cat, I recommend keeping it where they cannot get to it. They love things that roll.”

You laughed, imaging your own cat at home having a field day with this...wand, she called it. “Got it.”

Without moving away, she pushed a sky blue stone into your hand alongside the other small stone. You weren’t sure when she grabbed that one, but maybe you had been too caught up in checking her out to notice. “Celestite. This will help push chaotic thoughts out of your mind and bring you serenity. You can place this stone wherever you place your lepidolite.” Her nail tapped against the purple stone, a subtle way to remind you which was which. 

She closed your palm around your new crystals, her fingers lingering against your own before letting go. The stones clicked as they bumped each other within your closed fist. Her movements were swift as she walked behind the glass counter, her aura beckoning you to follow. She reached for your hand, gently pulling the crystals from your hand and setting them onto the counter top. 

Before you could say anything, she placed a brown bottle next to your - well, her - findings. A black spray-cap sat screwed into the top of the bottle, and your eyes darted down to the white wrap around label. Decorated with small stars and a crescent moon, the label read ‘calming pillow spray’ with, what you assumed were ingredients, listed below: sage and lavender.

“I’m sensing that you’re more stressed than you lead on earlier.” Her voice caused your head to pick up. “Spray this a few times onto your pillow before you sleep, and after you meditate with the wand.” Her fingers tapped the white stone wand silently. “Remember to breathe in deep, holding it for a few seconds before exhaling. Taking in the scent of lavender will help you become calm, while sage can help with insomnia. I sometimes spray this in the air when I’m stressed, just to help me relax.” A small giggle left her lips, and her smiling face left you absolutely enchanted.

You found yourself smiling back. “Thank you. So much, for all your help.”

The clicking of her fingertips typing on the computer filled the air. “Of course. It’s why I’m here.” 

You watched with unwavering intent as she placed each item on their own sheet of purple tissue paper, showering them with a mystery mixture of crushed herbs. Whatever it was, the smell made you feel more relaxed than you had felt in weeks. 

After paying, you grabbed your bag from her and started to leave the shop. But before you even made it halfway through the crystals room, you stopped and turned around. “Hey. What’s your name?”

“Dami.”

You bit your bottom lip before smiling. “Thank you very much, Dami. I hope to see you again.”

“Likewise.”

The images of Dami crowded your mind as you made your way home. You could still feel her gaze on you, her touch against your hand and the warm, homely feeling that you got when you were around her. You hadn’t realized how much she and that shop affected you until you stepped outside, the sunlight falling down to kiss your skin and hair.

It was a decent drive to your apartment, the brown bag sat on your passenger’s seat the whole ride home.

The moon had risen before you were able to sit down in your bedroom and open up the purchases from earlier. As you reached in, your fingers brushed against what felt like card stock. It proved to be a business card, the word Avalon across the front in a fantastical font. You flipped it over, eyes widening a tad at the scribbled phone number. Beneath the number was a short yet sweet message:

“Sleep well and sweet dreams. May we meet again.

-Dami”

[ilovedangos]

Cosplaying CLANNAD

CLANNADman

Okazaki is the average high school kind of guy that almost every anime has. He’s not going to be hard to portray unless you’re the weird minority who lives in a different world. To be like him all you need is:

spiky blue or dark hair (natural or dyed)

tan skintone (If you’re naturally pale you can choose to get a tan. All optional anyway!)

male Hikarizaka school uniform with senior badge

plain and casual clothes

a straight face (He's never seen without one except for few occasions.)

a low voice

realist attitude

street-smarts

casual, informal way of speech

teenage immaturity (Okazaki is the rebellious type who always breaks the rules.)

talk less (He isn’t a very talkative person.)

talking slowly (Okazaki is always calm and never talks fast.)

low energy level (He is always tired, laidback, and very relaxed.)

a sense of humor (He and Sunohara are never caught dead without one!)

Cockroach

Nagisa is a shy girl who is bad at making friends and later become’s Okazaki’s wife. She is going to be hard to cosplay because of her shyness, eccentricity, and often animated demeanor. If you’re not a shy or strange person, I suggest you carefully follow every single one of these tips to better understand how she acts:

short red or brown hair with antennae

amber contacts (because of her unnatural eye color but optional)

kawaii makeup (Nagisa doesn’t wear a lot of makeup so you can just go for an ulzzang look with faux lashes if you’re eyes aren’t big.)

peach skintone (Getting a tan or not is all optional.)

female Hikarizaka school uniform with senior badge

girly, cute clothes with light colors that aren’t too stylish (Nagisa is a girly girl so besides her school uniform, she is seen wearing skirts or dresses.)

girly and childish high pitched voice (Again she is a girly girl and also very childish.)

always say “desu” at the end of your sentences (She’s one of those weirdos with fucking verbal tics!)

smile and talk a lot (Nagisa is a very bubbly and talkative girl who is never suffering in silence.)

talk fast (She is a very excitable and nervous person.)

blush all the time (She lacks composure.)

innocence (She always follows the rules.)

optimistic attitude (Nagisa sees the good in everything to a fault.)

very good manners (Nagisa is demure, always talks politely, and never swears.)

apologize and forgive (Nagisa always apologizes even if the other person wronged her.)

sensitivity and earnesty (Nagisa doesn’t have much sense of humor and acts on her feelings. Like her mom, she cries a lot or gets defensive when insulted.)

Dangos (She always talks about them nonstop; you can even sing the song all the time to be more like her.)

Fujibayashi twins

The twins are CLANNADman’s friends whom act as support for the Drama Club. They are just normal Japanese high school girls that are easy to portray if you live in Japan or have knowledge of Japanese culture. Since they’re opposite in personalities, you’ll have to be aware of how they each act.

Kyou is a bold and energetic girl who has been good friends with Okazaki since their junior year. She is the archetypal Tsundere, which means type A. To have her aggressive personality, you’ll need:

long purple hair (dyed or wig)

white lace hair ribbon (left side)

bold makeup (Kyou has piercing purple Tsurime eyes so you’d want to apply lots of eyeliner to look fierce like her. Then fill in your eyebrows to complete the look.)

fair skin (If you’re naturally tan I suggest you stay that way.)

female Hikarizaka school uniform with senior badge

flashy, bright colored clothes

knee-high socks

audacity

high energy level

a bad temper

loud, rough voice (mezzo-soprano)

informal, tomboyish way of speech

talk at a faster speed (She’s very energetic and expressive.)

cooking skills (For a tomboy, Kyou is an excellent cook.)

athletism (Participate in as many sports you can in your school.)

work ethic

good sense of humor (She can use sarcasm but she doesn’t have the silly humor like CLANNADman or Sunohara.)

textbooks (to throw at idiots, especially when you see CLANNADman or Sunohara)

pet boar (optional)

sibling to protect (optional)

Kyou's twin is a timid girl who knew Okazaki through her sister and had a crush on him ever since. She doesn’t have as much of a personality nor presence like the other characters which makes it an advantage to easily cosplay her. All you need in order to be like this Dandere girl is:

Similar appearance as her twin except short hair and hairpiece (right side)

mild-mannered face (She has blue Tareme eyes.)

female Hikarizaka school uniform with senior badge

light, dull makeup (Fujibayashi doesn’t stand out much so she won’t be wearing lots of makeup.)

light, casual clothes

soft-spoken, mezzo-soprano voice

cautiousness and hesitance (Unlike her twin, she is a girl who thinks before she speaks or acts.)

clumsiness

talk at a slower speed (She doesn’t talk very much.)

decent manners (Fujibayashi is a fairly polite girl in both speech and behavior, especially compared to her boisterous sister who always yells and acts brash.)

work ethic

sense of humor (She has a decent and average amount of humor, no problems understanding jokes or sarcasm.)

do anything for your true love (Fujibayashi can be bolder when in a serious situation that involves her love, Kappei. She risked telling him white lies and had the courage to have his baby if he didn’t want live.)

player cards (Her hobby is fortune telling.)

older sibling (optional)

Tomoyo

Tomoyo is a tough and cool girl who becomes good friends with Tomoya and Sunohara. She is the 'Strong-Silent-Type' who is very mature for her age; she’d be an example of a Kuudere. Tomoyo is a female version of Tomoya since she doesn’t have any noticeable quirks like many of the other characters and is the most sane compared to the other girls. She is a classic tomboy so to cosplay her you’ll need:

Rapunzel length messy silver hair and bangs (dyed or wig)

thick black headband

dark, dull makeup (Tomoyo is more quieter compared to many of the girls in both appearance and personality. You can apply smoky eyeliner then draw your eyebrows in a dark, deep color to give the serious look that she has.)

pale skintone (You can always remember to put sunscreen so you don’t get tan.)

female Hikarizaka school uniform with junior badge

athleisure style or streetwear

piercings (a few here and there)

stoic face

deep monotone

being talented (She is very strong and nobody, not even Kyou, can beat her in that. Eat healthy and exercise to be more fit, beautiful like her.)

intelligence (Tomoyo is a straight A student and has many opportunities ahead of her. To seem smarter, you can pick up a book or 2, study more, or watch the news.)

sense of responsibility (Tomoyo is diligent and hardworking.)

talk less (Tomoyo is a girl of few words; she speaks only when necessary.)

talk slowly (She is a sensible girl who doesn’t have time for nonsense such as Sunohara.)

casual but direct form of speech

confidence (why she’s known as the STRONG silent type of girl)

dark or dry sense of humor (Tomoyo is very snarky and sarcastic like CLANNADman.)

Kotomi

Kotomi is a taciturn and sluggish girl Tomoya reunites with as she is his childhood friend. She is the school’s genius and is seen always reading books in the library. Kotomi is the archetypal Dandere lacking in social skills and common sense which makes her seemingly strange. What you’ll need to cosplay this hot nerd is:

dark purple hair (dyed or wig, medium length)

horsetails tied with 2 large pink beads

pale skintone (not too pale)

female Hikarizaka school uniform with senior badge

formal clothes (Kotomi is a nerd so she always dresses conservatively.)

emotionless face

low, quiet mezzo-soprano voice

talk less (Kotomi is a very taciturn and reticent person who is barely seen talking.)

talking at a very slow speed

good manners (Kotomi is a polite girl despite being a nerd with no social skills.)

low energy level

books (Her hobby is reading all day.)

violin (If you’re a violin player and want to have a deadly weapon, put pressure on the strings to make it sound higher and deafening.)

teddy bear (She loves bears.)

weak sense of humor (Kotomi isn’t one for humor and when she tries, it’s not supposed to be funny. Because she lacks social skills, she doesn’t know how to tell jokes.)

Fu-chan

Fuko is a childish girl who befriends Okazaki and Nagisa. She is actually a ghost whose real self is still in a coma. Fuko is a very loud and hyperactive girl who gets easily distracted. Since you have to be good enough to act as this silly girl, you’re going to need:

dark green hair (natural or wig, medium length, low ponytail tied in a big blue ribbon)

technicolor contacts (She has light unnatural colored eyes.)

bright, colorful kids makeup

tan skintone (optional)

female Hikarizaka school uniform with freshman badge

youthful, colorful clothes

loud, childish voice

very animated facial expressions and body language

talk at a very fast speed (Fuko is the most talkative character in the show and is never speechless.)

artistic interests

little to no manners (Fuko acts like a little girl and tends to come off rude at times)

wooden “starfish” sculpture

childlike sense of humor (Fuko tends to joke around with Tomoya and Sunohara, but her humor isn’t as mature as theirs.)

Sunohara

Sunohara is Okazaki’s best friend who is another fellow delinquent. He is the Boke of the duo and tends to make the stupidest, most immature jokes ever. Sunohara is very easy to portray because he is another average idiotic, immature teenage boy just like CLANNADman. All you’re gonna need is:

bleached hair (He is an archetypal Anime delinquent character.)

fair skin (If you’re naturally tan I suggest you stay that way.)

blue contacts (He is “baby-faced” so his light blue eyes emphasize that.)

male Hikarizaka school uniform with senior badge

sloppy and bright clothes

loud, excitable voice (He has a more higher voice than the darker, more serious CLANNADman.)

obnoxious facial expressions and body language

very rude, informal way of speech (Sunohara talks in an abrasive manner, lacking any sense of politeness.)

talk at a fast speed (Sunohara talks a lot, way more than the quiet Okazaki.)

low energy level (He is a very lazy and tired guy who is hard to motivate.)

waste time (He is known for being the dumbest character in the show.)

distract people for no reason (He always provokes others for stupid reasons.)

cause trouble all the time

irresponsibility (Sunohara is a coward who puts the blame on others for his own mistakes.)

think you’re all that when you’re not (Sunohara has a huge ego even though he is still thought as a loser.)

silly, dirty sense of humor (Sunohara is very insensitive and makes offensive jokes which gets him beaten up a lot.)

Miyazawa

Yukine is a nice, quiet girl Tomoya meets in the back of the school library. She helps him and anyone who visits her, always serving them tea and casting spells. She is the girliest but most wisest, mature of the characters, so to be like her you’ll need:

straight light brown hair with ahoge (natural or dyed, medium-length)

sleepy eyes

full-face or light makeup (Yukine is a mature, feminine character so she’ll have to look pretty and refined. You can start off with contouring your face, applying foundation, etc. Then lightly apply eyeliner and draw in eyebrows. Apply light eyeshadow, mascara, blush, and lipgloss as well.)

pale skintone (not too pale)

female Hikarizaka school uniform with junior badge

lowkey, feminine wardrobe (Yukine is a motherly figure who wears sophisticated clothes.)

a warm, welcoming smile

quiet, reserved voice (Yukine never raises her voice unless something serious happens.)

low energy level

talk at a slow speed (Never talk too fast as that’s the opposite of calm which Yukine is.)

great manners (Yukine is always polite and considerate to others.)

cooking skills (She’s very feminine so she’s obviously going to be good in the kitchen.)

magic spells book (She likes books people don’t read very much, that get left without being touched.)

tea set (She always makes and gives tea when she sees someone.)

[victorluvsalice]

But I forgot to mention I’d also made over VICTOR, didn’t I? :p This is something interesting I found out recently -- remember how, when Alice first became a vampire, I discovered I had to go into Manage Households -- Edit In CAS to properly do her vampire dark form? Turns out you can edit ALL of your sims in CAS like that. Which included the chance to give Victor his PROPER skintone. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to do that when I made over Alice, but when Emma aged up, I decided “You know what, I DO want to do that.” So yeah, from now on, Victor’s going to be properly pale!

As for the house makeover -- well, it started out with me updating Emma’s bedroom from a toddler’s room to a child’s, and then I decided that, if I was going to have that front hallway thing, I ought to own it. I also decided that, they have money, I can get them some nicer things, so -- I did! The most major changes include:

-->The aforementioned “front hall” area -- I widened it out so it looked less weird, got a nice new door, and stuck a few shoe racks and a side table in there to make it look lived-in

-->Lots of new seating -- more comfortable chairs mean happier Sims!

-->Emma now has a proper child bed (it’s actually one of the new Cats & Dogs beds, which has a headboard that looks like a kitty), and I traded her toddler bookcase for a small desk for homework

-->Victor’s music room now has a personal desk and computer for him, along with his ladybug habitat. There’s still a computer in the bedroom, but much like the Brown/Kosperov merging, I figured it made more sense to have multiple computers in the house

-->Updated the look of some of the kitchen items (going strong with the black appliances theme now), and -- as you can see in the walls-up picture -- got some wall cabinets! I’ve never used them before, and I decided, why not?

-->Also in “Things I Don’t Normally Use But Decided To Try Out” -- curtains! I blame this one on the YouTube Simmer Deligracy -- she did a build of a vampire house and felt it important to have lots of curtains. I was kind of inspired and decided to slap a few up

-->Expanded the backyard patio area to make room for the “Wake The Llama” game (decided I wanted to keep it), rearranged the doggy obstacle course a bit, added monkey bars for Emma to play on, and made Victor’s garden slightly bigger to accommodate a future new tree

What new tree, you ask? Well, that’s for next week. Tune in then -- the Van Dorts are getting out of the house! Quite a bit, in fact. . .

[schpiedehl]

An open letter to Hamilton (etc) fan artists, Re:whitewashing

Hello. Time for another ill-constructed rant on probably already well-tread ground. Specifically whitewashing in fan art (even more specifically Hamilton art though this could be applied to any fandom) and when it is ok. lol jk it’s never ok. PLEASE NOTE: I am an (amateur) artist. I am not ragging on artists because I “don’t understand how hard making art is,” “how hard artists work,” or what have you. These are legitimate problems of representation in fanart (that I have witnessed firsthand) and this is my earnest attempt to elucidate these issues. Feel free to interact with this post as you see fit. I am always free for debate if you disagree, would like clarification, or have anything to add.  

+Look out for those embedded hyperlinks for more content 

Preface: I am a member of far too many fb Hamilton groups. Sometimes people post their art, apparently forgetting that when you post things online you open yourself to critique. Hilarity ensues.

I often see Hamilton characters (generally portrayed as original Broadway cast members - Lin-Manuel Miranda, Okieriete Onaodowan, Anthony Ramos, etc.) who have been horrifically whitewashed - complete with lightened skin, bizarrely red or light brown hair, lightened eyes, and so forth. The most common defenses for this misstep, from both artists and fans, are personal style and apparent inability to approximate accurate skin tone (“I tried but skin color is hard”). Here’s why both of those excuses are utter bullshit.

1. Personal Style:

A lot of things in life are open to interpretation and all art is inherently interpretive. But the racial and cultural identity of a real life person is not one of these interpretive things. [PAUSE: before anyone says that this is precisely what Hamilton is doing with its casting, don’t.] First of all, I get it, personal style is important to art. Some people trend toward realism while others prefer more abbreviated, abstracted, and/or cartoony styles and part of that is selecting stylized color palettes, interpreting color in new and inventive ways, and playing with light, value, line, form, etc. This is NOT what I am talking about. It is entirely possible to honor a person’s background using relative or approximated shading/tone/coloration and to create beautiful art in the process [example: Chris Vision’s color series]. This little rant is specifically directed at people who "attempt" to depict Hamilton (etc) actors/characters using realistic/semi-realistic color palettes (as in, how they appear irl, accounting for abstraction, drawing style, etc) but fall short when it comes to depicting the actors, particularly in regards to racial background. You can find excellent examples of what I mean at Calling Out Whitewashed Hamilton Art and I’m positive you can find far too many examples in this and many other fandoms simply by scrolling through the tags on Tumblr and Instagram.  So without further ado, lightening a person/character’s skin in fanart is racist. There’s really no ifs, ands, or buts about it. Foremost, the practice of editing a person of color to appear more European (skin, hair, eyes, even facial features) intentionally erases the cultural, racial, and ethnic background of the person in question. This is incredibly disrespectful to the actors who portray these characters and works to undermine what Hamilton as a whole is trying to build. If Hamilton is trying to reclaim American history for People of Color, stripping the racial, ethnic, and cultural backgrounds from the actors represents a rejection of conceit and, perhaps, even a form of appropriation. It is as though “fans” are saying that they want the art that is made by and for POC while simultaneously rejecting the distinctly racialized aspects of that art. When artists depict Lin!Hamilton as white, they are rejecting the Nuyorican background which Lin brings to the character in both writing and performance and projecting faux whiteness upon the character. In doing so, whether consciously or not, they are rejecting the actor’s race as well. Lin is beloved because of the art that he makes which allows many fans to look past his racial and cultural identity rather than accept it as an intrinsic aspect of both the man and his art.  Moreover, the ubiquity of this whitewashed art also reveals a lot about what “fans” find visually appealing and acceptable - e.g., the Eurocentric standard of beauty. Whitewashing in art represents not only a rejection of POC’s culture but, obviously, their physical attributes as well. Dark skin is lightened and or whitened, hair is often straightened and/or lightened to a light brown or red hue (with the exception of Laurens, whose features, hair in particular, are often feminized as a form a queer fetishization but that is a rant for another day), and features are changed to appear more European. Often, depictions of characters are changed so much it is nearly impossible to tell that the art is based on any particular actor. In addition to being, again, extremely disrespectful to the actors, this further perpetuates the extremely harmful notion that beauty only exists in European features and sends a direct message to POC fans that their appearance is neither beautiful not accepted by the fanbase of a piece of media that was made by other POC specifically to appeal to them. This seems especially true of dark skinned black individuals who are often completely stripped of the melanin in fan art, further driving home notions of ingrained cultural colorism and anti-blackness. With Hamilton in particular, it is fine to “change” a character’s race if and only if you are depicting a character as a different actor. For instance, while Lin!Hamilton is Latino, Michael!Hamilton is a black man and depicting Hamilton as such, while uncommon among fan communities, is better than fine [*the lack of art of dark skinned actors is another point of contention. Not only are dark skinned actors frequently whitewashed, many are ignored altogether]. Depicting Michael!Hamilton as light skinned or white, however, is obviously not fine.  Having established that lightening a character’s skin or depicting them with more European features is inherently racist, the claim that whitewashing is a stylistic choice is invalid. If you make the “stylistic choice” to depict a POC as white, you are racist. End of story.  And if you want to do better but find yourself wanting to draw Lin!Hamilton as white, remember that this guy existed and just draw him instead. It’s not that hard.  2. Technical Difficulties:

One of the most unfortunately common excuses for whitewashing in fanart seems to be that, for some reason or another, artists have difficulty accurately approximating actors’ skin color so they presumedly just make something up, This results in Lin!Hamilton and Phillipa!Eliza looking a bit like Snow White, Oak!Mulligan looking a little tan, and so forth. As an artist, I understand that approximating realistic skintones can be rather hard, especially with traditional mediums, but it is glaringly obvious when artists don’t put in any effort.  With traditional mediums such as paint, markers, or color pencils, artists can blend to create the colors which accurately (or as accurately as possible given the limitations of certain mediums like watercolors) approximate actors’ skin tones. If the colors dry lighter than intended, the artist generally layer and blend more to achieve a better approximation. If they then scan their image, they can use a photo editor to fix or correct any mistakes. It might not be the easiest to find good matches (speaking from experience, there aren’t a ton of good warm brown toned markers and thus a lot of blending is sometimes required) but, as previously stated, it’s generally easy to tell when someone at least tried to get close to a correct skin tone. With digital art, it’s even easier. Fact: Nearly all art programs have a nifty eyedropper tool which can be used to pull color swatches directly from a reference picture. Even MSpaint has this function. By pulling multiple swatches from a variety of reference images (to account for different lighting conditions), an artist can build a relatively accurate gradiented palette for skin tone. It’s really that simple! And if an artist notices that the color isn’t quite right, it’s nothing a few tweaks to hue and saturation can’t fix!  If my tone seemed a bit sarcastic/passive aggressive in that last paragraph, it’s because it totally was. I see this excuse so much more often than I see any other excuse for whitewashed fan art and it is incredibly frustrating but also, as an (extraordinarily mediocre) artist myself, it rings incredibly inaccurate, especially for digital art. I completely understand that it sometimes takes a lot of time to get used to a medium but when an artist’s color palette is literally limitless, there is absolutely no reason (aside from personal, possibly subconscious/implicit but no less real, biases) for an actor/character to be depicted as white/light skinned when they are not. As previously discussed, that is disrespectful and harmful, and really only serves to make the artist (and those that support work) look like a jackass.  And look, if you find yourself making whitewashed art, it’s not as though it is impossible to change. When someone criticizes your whitewash-y art, don’t get defensive. Don’t claim that it’s your style or that you don’t know how to color POC. It looks and sounds really fucking ridiculous. Instead, evaluate your art and place it into a cultural context. Take it as an opportunity to improve. And maybe also take the opportunity to learn a little about yourself and your biases.  This wasn’t meant to be a call out post and I’d like to end this on a positive note so here are a few wonderful Hamilton fan artists who are worth a look:  terror-in-a-dream zzzoehsu linmanwhydididothis mikiprice thegentlehoneybee dorothywonderland maeng

[mirokuna-hime]

All of the plants

Oh my …God! thank you so much rabbah

This goes under a cut because this is really long and sometimes I couldn’t stop rambling

baby’s breath: 5 things you associate yourself with:

headphones (I’ve got 6 and they are all lying around the house because I#m always hearing music),everything chocolate flavored,literature,games aaannd cats

bleeding heart: what makes you heart go mushy?

I’m pretty hard to crack honestly but if something makes my heart go mushy it’s friendship? Like if I see a beautiful supportive friendship of two people who trust each other unconditionally my heart just melts. Cheeta and Patsu of Castle in the sky (my favorite ghibli movie btw)is a prime example of that. Everyone deserves a friend like Patsu!

bell flower: what’s the title of the song that makes you want to jump around out of joy?

O-zone - Dragostea din tei !                                                                        Numa, numa, yay! Numa, Numa, Numa yay!~ 

Sorry I got carried away a little. This is such an old song , a song of my childhood to be exact but I love it so much I can’t keep my feet still once the first few seconds of this song start playing.

evening primrose: what’s your sleeping playlist (give me 5 songs)?

I have no sleeping playlist, but sometimes they have radioplays with the horror genre in the radio sooo yeah I listen to that to fall asleep (they also do Ann of Green Gables sometimes but pssshhht!)

forget-me-not: who is your favorite blog who isn’t following you?

@checkurselfb4umachuwreckurself I really love his content but i actually don’t mind him not following me since my blog is a mess!

daffodil: what is one plant that you want to have but can never get?

plastic plants…Listen I’m really not good with flowers or anything green, I killed a cactus once and the palm tree in my room isn’t looking that healthy either v.v But my mum won’t allow me one because of all the dust…

calla lily: are you more of a sunny day or a rainy evening?

rainy evening 100% I like thunderstorms even more I think they’re relaxing, a nice book/movie, some tea, some snacks and here you have my dream of an evening

foxglove: what is your favorite color and in what shade?

ughhhh dammit, I love so many colours especially pastels but if you really want me to choose it’s burgundy? I like any colour with some violet in it to be fair…

lavender: what is something that you’ve always wanted to be/have/get but can never have?

My initial thought was “cats!” but I can keep some once I moved out so that doesn’t count. And this now, is goin to sound completely stupid but ..blonde hair. I wanted to be blondewith bright green eyes (I’m a sucker for green eyes)  since I was a small child. My hair is dark brown with a lot of red in it so colouring it isn’t really an option my skintone also doesn’t fit well with blonde hair so rip my aesthetics…

love in a mist: what is the latest dream that you remember?

I dreamed I failed my music test, which I was supposed to be writing today but it was cancelled…

daisy: what is your favorite flavor of cotton candy, ice cream, and juice?

Never had cotton candy, chocolate, good old classic orange juice

painter’s palette: are you more of a singer, dancer, painter, or instrumentalist?

I’m more of a painter, I doodle rather often but I feel insecure about my results maybe one day I will upload something. I’m a disaster when it comes to music to be honest…

tulip: what is your most favorite make-up product? do you like it more natural, dark, or etc?

natural,since I don’t wear make up, I never learned how to use it properly. I’ll look like clown if I would try it now also i feel uncomfortable with it.

waxflower: are you a bee or a butterfly person? a dog or a cat person?

Neither I’m terrified of insects (and spiders) of any kind so even a butterfly will freak me out. I love both but I’m more of a cat person.

sugarbush: do you have sweet tooth? if yes, what’s your favorite sweets? if no, why?

chocolate…and I have a very sweet tooth

sunflower: would you like to be a fairy or a mermaid?

I’d rather be a mermaid that way I can’t drown, which is number one of my list in “Ways I don’t want to Die” (yes I also have a list in ways I would “like” to day before you ask)

sweet pea: what would you like to call your significant other?

Im boring. I would like to call him/her by his/her name or a shortform of it. I only use petnames on actual pets. I call them baby, beautiful, sweety etc. 

sea lavender: can you swim? which strokes can you do?

butterfly style but I’m horribly slow and a bad swimmer.

windflower: list 5 of your favorite blogs and explain why i like them

@sasstral, @xionchan and @checkurselfb4umachuwreckurself I like the content! and the humour! and the people!

@reijiakabutt and @pendulum-sonata :These two are by far not the biggest fans of zexal,but I like reading their rants and they changed my opinions on lots of things plus I like to see things from a different perspective (same goes for @kaguranzu)

golden rod: are you more of a baker or a cook?

I’m a great cook but my desserts are even better! 

bloom: what is something that you would like to tell your children?

I don’t want children but i would propably tell them that it is fine to make mistakes and have regrets, you just need to accept them and grow from that experience!

peony: what is something that you wish your parents could’ve told you?

I wish my family would have been alot more convincing at telling me that “santa is real” ! Every Chrisrmas was hell for the pour soul who had to put on the santa costume because I was a little shit and didn’t believe in santa and searched for proof that he doesn’t exist every. goddamn. christmas! I apologize for that mum.

prairie gentian: do you have a significant other?

never had one

september flower: are you more of a sunshine or sunset person?

sunset, I see it every morning while I walk to school

bird of paradise: do you wake up early? do you sleep early?

wake up early but go to bed rather late..I don’t know how I manage to do this

marigold: what’s your favorite tea?

google translate told me it’s rose hips tea…should I trust him?

peruvian lily: what are the names of your pets?

My first dog was named: Trixie, my second Lucky. I have two birds that are called: Berry and Litschi

hyacinth: do you name your plants?

the name of my palm tree ist Bernd

lilac: would you rather sleep and be cozy or hang out with your friends?Why not both?

poppy: do you like to dip your fries or do you like it as is?

dip!

dandelion: any special talent that you have?

Teachers have been telling me I’m gifted at writing and anylyzing! I#m proud of that 

[theres-someone-to-write-about-it]

A Queen’s Return

“I remember you being… prettier.” He stares down at me, brows furrowed in contempt for the woman he is betrothed to marry. I do not open my mouth, biting back the fire in my throat I wish to spit at him. In true womanly manners, I smile before bowing my head as my body automatically curtsies. 

“I apologize, my lord. She came to us like this,” the Duke detaches all blame from himself, avoiding any possible way I could meet his eyes. Not moments ago he was reassuring and comforting, however in the face of a King true colors are shown. I am not here to be beautiful, I am here to follow through on an alliance. Had either of them known what I had been through away from court, maybe their words would be kinder. I refuse to allow them to pity me, I will suffer disdain before pity. The King shrugs, grown bored with my arrival, and I am shipped off to my chambers to prepare for my first official dinner back at court. 

As I am escorted from the room, I hear all manner of talk to cancel much of celebration for this evening. It seems the King does not wish to show off his now ugly bride. He may do what he wishes, I shall have no more influence on him now than when we are married. Despite what ladies maids and lesser courtiers whisper, I am no more happy about this arrangement than he is. 

My chamber is considerable, as fit for a Queen to be. A large bed, four wooden posts with all manner of floral designs cut into them by hand, taking hours, perhaps years, supporting an elegant canopy. Around the large room are symbols of my future husband's country; crests and colors of the flag, as to constantly remind me of where I must spend the rest of my days. Bitterly, I almost refuse to sit on the bed, wishing to burn the entire room in order to redecorate it myself with all the things I wished to bring from home. However, I would most likely be ordered to enjoy the smell of burnt curtains. I am no longer of my home, there is nothing there for me now. 

Within the wardrobe are dresses off all style and color, in the drawers shoes to match. All manner of makeup and skin care products in the vanity. It is all any courtier woman would dream of. To please my King, these things will be plastered across my face to achieve some sort of aesthetic favor, distract him from the fact that in 15 years I have indeed changed. A long, sad sigh lets up from my throat but I have no time to pity myself. My task has been planned and ingrained in my memory since I was old enough to understand my father's advisors crafty words and double meanings. I’ve been sent here for one reason and I mustn't fail. I hear a knock on the door, the page enters announcing the names of my ladies. I forget them within minutes as their expressions of joy turn to exasperation at my unpleasing looks. 

They all rush to me at once, pulling out dresses by the armful in order to compare the color with my skintone. Pale yellow makes my face look sunken in, emerald doesn’t go with my eyes, and lavender washes out my hair. Finally, a deep blue gown is pulled from the very back, causing one of them to mutter how it was left here by the last one. Last one of the King’s ladies I assume with annoyance flaring in my gut. An unmarried man is allowed any past he wishes, especially a king, women on the other hand must be chaste else our worth be destroyed. I am sure that every eye in this castle is on me, looking for some stain on my reputation to remove my chances of marrying the King. 

The blue, despite its former ownership being questionable, makes my skin, eyes, and hair glow according to the women. It’s a simple piece, which has my appreciation and does not require much fuss to put on or walk in. Next, my face and hair are tugged at, smeared with substances, and drastically changed so that when I am allowed to look in the mirror I do not recognize myself, there is no trace of me left. 

The dinner bell rings, erupting in a rush of last minute checks in every reflective surface on the way to the dining room. The dining room itself was stripped of the grandeur previously planned, set with the lowest of plates and pewter goblets. It was a non-verbal slap in the face to my honor as a guest, but I did not waver in my stoney expression, acting as if I had not noticed. Surprisingly, a server pulled my chair beside the King out for me and I was prepared to sit by myself without anyone standing in honor, when a figure shadowed by the dusk light stood at attention and saluted me as my countrymen do in the highest honor. 

Whispers were silenced as I remain standing, awestruck and speechless at this outright defiance towards the King and allegiance to me. Politely, with as little smugness I could muster showing through, I smile and return to salute. It is good to know I have a friend here at court. As I sit, the figure waits a moment before following suit, and then the food and drinks are brought out from the kitchen. Servants do not bother to stick to the shadows as they do in formal meals, there is no glass raised to toast my return or talk of joyful memories many at the table and I shared as children. Courtiers gossip about the goings on in countries they’ve never set foot in, perpetuating false rumors that ruin kingdoms overnight. I move the food in front of me about my plate, not trusting that the smallest bite will not poison me. I keep my head high, posture straight, and eyes meeting everyone at the table. It’s better to know who will meet my eyes and who will avoid it at all costs, so far the only one I can trust is the dark figure at the end of the table who raises their glass or nods their head slightly whenever they find my glance on them. 

Four courses and not a chanced bite later, the actual guests take their leave, receiving a head bow and a generous thank you from the King. He has not looked in my direction once all evening, not that I expected him to. Even with the supposed miracle work my ladies had done, I am no more than the once beautiful young child and now ugly woman. We are escorted together from the hall, sheltered by our perspective parties from one another. The ladies talk of dresses and new people visiting in the coming days to see me before I am married to the King. A wedding date has been set for the coming year, plans being drawn without consultation from me as I am to assume everything will be. 

I take my leave from the incessant jabbering just as the four voices start to sound exactly the same. As if one person is having four parts of a conversation with herself. I strip from my gown, taking pleasure in removing every pin and kohl mark from my hair and face. There is a framed picture on my bureau I catch behind me in the mirror, it wasn’t there before. Once I am myself again, I pick up the picture. It is of me as a young child, formally taken here when a photographer came to visit the castle about his invention. Even through the grain, I see that I have changed so much. Looking back into the mirror, I analyze my features in attempt to justify the hatred for me. As a young girl my hair was the color of shadowed honeycomb, but as I grew older it darkened into a brown with only a glimpse of auburn. My eyes, too, have changed from a reflection of the pure blue sea to deeply sad olive green. Even my skin which once was pale and smooth has deepened to tan with an abundance of freckles. How could I have changed so much? 

Shaking away the brewing headache from not eating, today’s events, and my most recent inquiry. I turn down all the oil lamps and pull the covers up around my body in preparation for an uneasy night's sleep. I can practically hear my father growling in my ears, pushing me to complete my task that very night. He is a regularly impatient man, which is why his advisors charged me with this duty to my country. I must gain the trust of the King, be in his every confidence and thought as his wife. Only then may I take my choice of vials hidden amongst the few belongings I was awarded to bring, picking the poison most fitted to kill the King without rising the most suspicion. 

I will kill the King.  

The coming morning I am woken by a rather rude serving woman, angrily announcing the King’s Mother had demanded an audience with me. Grumbling to myself in the few moments of peace I have before the ladies arrive to fuss over my lack of presentability. I take a seat at my vanity, brushing fingers against the features I find agreeable despite being criticized otherwise. My elegantly sharp jaw and shapely cheekbones, I trace the underside of my collarbone sighing. I had just pride in it before, how my face thinned after being so full as a child. I had not much of a choice, really, fullness in the cheeks are gained through eating healthily as a royal, and such a luxury I was never afforded. 

Natural fullness in my figure has served me well in my life and this court, seemingly the only attribute that is not looked upon with almost promise. I stand and shrug on my robe as the four women storm into my chamber unannounced in a rush of giggling gossip. 

“Have you seen the size of his wardrobe? It’s as large as a lady’s,” one of them laughs heartily, her yellow hair is curled in waves down her back and set in graceful beadwork. I suppose that as I am to live here the rest of my known days, I should at least learn to separate one girl from the next. 

“Compensating for much smaller things I have no doubt,” this one has red hair, it curls naturally in untamable spirals only to the edge of her shoulder blades. The others giggle in agreement, only perpetuating what is implied. 

“Well you would know, Diana, or was it another noble that kept you from the lady’s chamber until this morning?” The third smirks over her shoulder at the fourth, presumably Diana. Both have raven hair, so straight it seems unnatural, and pinned with combs that are identical except in color. Sharing the same rounded jaw and soft brown eyes, I assume sisterhood. Diana gives no reply but a rude look to let the giggles die down. Finally, all four acknowledge my presence.

“Morning, your grace,” They say together, half curtsying. The urge to demand respect strikes my chest, but I must earn favor not grudges. I force a smile which appears real after all the practice I’ve had. 

“Good morning, ladies. I trust you slept well.” Looks of confusion and caution cross their faces as I had not spoken a word to anyone yesterday and scarcely met their eyes. Collectively, they nod in response muttering affirmatives. “Shall I start pulling my own dresses?” At that, it is a rush away from my eyes and to the wardrobe which is freshly stocked with gowns in shades of blue, violet, green less rich than the emerald I tried yesterday. Easily, I am dressed and even the process of my makeup is less extreme than it was for dinner. 

Soon I am being escorted to my future mother-in-law’s private balcony. She is also presented in less grandeur than last night’s dinner. Her brown hair matches that of her son, despite being grown out to be voluminous and lovely adorned in a Queen’s fashion. The morning sunlight glows the slightest gold within her dark chocolate hair. She looks up as soon as I enter the balcony, it is set with only two plates from the simplest of a Queen’s dining ware, much more respect than I received with dinner. “Good morning, my child. Please sit and have breakfast with me.” 

I smile softly with a deep bow and take the seat opposite her, smoothing out my skirt before speaking, “Thank you for having me, your Majesty. It is an honor to make your acquaintance.” 

“Oh, dear, if it is alright with you I’d prefer to skip all this formality and get to the point.” Her tone is light, but I am cautious as to what point she wishes to discuss. I am prepared to defend the alliance both she and I are sworn to. I nod in agreement, secretly happy to not constantly worry about every syllable I let escape my mouth. “Good, now as clearly made by the disgrace of a dinner, my son is not happy with this match. While I knew fully that you would change naturally over the years, my immature son expected the fair haired, doe-eyed, girl he enjoyed playing with as a child. Despite whatever the King may believe, we both know there is no way out of your marriage.” 

She pauses as servants bring out a plate of eggs, toast, and sausage. There was a bowl of sliced melons was placed on the table along with the filling of our goblets with white wine. I take a small sip and find it pleasantly refreshing, only momentarily hesitating with the thought of poison. The Queen nods her head knowingly, “We eat from the same pot, you have nothing to fear within my charge.”  

“Thank you, your Majesty, I am glad we are of equal mind on this matter.” 

[midlifechic]

Ok, so in the second of my new season direction posts, I want to talk about colour trends Autumn – Winter 18. There’s a temptation at this time of year to leave bright colours behind with summer and slide into a wardrobe of neutrals – blacks, greys and navys. I think it’s partly because we often subconsciously associate September with the start of school term and so there’s that whole uniform reference in our minds but also because it’s just easier to fade to grey. As soon as you start having to factor multiple pieces worn in various layers into an outfit, neutrals are just simpler. The problem for midlifers is that unless you have a strong natural skintone, as your own colouring starts to fade (in terms of complexion and hair), neutrals can just look and feel drab.

To back-check this theory I spent some time analysing both my own and other over-40 Instagram accounts. It’s noticeable that the posts featuring outfits in bold colours that suit the wearer get far more likes and engagement than neutrals, even if the neutral outfits work well. Colour just gives you a boost.

Now of course there’s a whole industry dedicated to colour analysis and I’m not an expert although I know some of you are. However over the years I’ve learned what suits me largely by making mistakes along the way. Long term readers will remember that when I was invited to ‘have my colours done,’ the autumnal palette that I was given just didn’t work for me, even though I agreed with it as we were going through the process. It was only when my sister went to see a different consultant and was defined as a ‘Blue Spring’ that I had a eureka moment.

If you feel unsure about your own best colours, there are a number of ways that you can uncover them

See a colour consultant

Think about the colours that you know you look good in and then go to the colour charts on the Kettlewell Colours website to find your grouping (go to the shop by colour section)

Have a look at Imogen Lamport’s blog which is completely dedicated not only to understanding your colour palette, but also to defining things like the level of contrast that will suit you. It explains why the classic colour consultant solution of two strong colours and a scarf in a third really doesn’t work for everyone.

Autumn 2018 colour trends

The reason that I want to help you to define your own best colours is that there are some incredibly strong and powerful shades around this autumn. Some, such as the many shades of brown, will be completely new to some people because they haven’t been around for such a long time. If you don’t know what you’re looking for, you’re going to feel lost when you start shopping in this season’s sartorial paintbox.

Why is bright colour such a dominant trend at the moment? As so often with fashion it’s partly socio-political. Whenever there’s a lot of bad news and uncertainty, humans find a way to cheer themselves up and colour is a solace. Years of boom tend to be filled with cool, soft colours and years of bust turn warm and vibrant.

I’m being strict with myself this year because as soon as I see the first autumn leaves, I usually head for every shade of burgundy and although I love it, it really doesn’t suit me. Luckily there’s less of it around to tempt me this year. In fact Grazia has declared that AW18 is simply down to a choice between purple and brown:

… but when you look through the reality of the new collections on the high street, there are a lot of other strong colours coming through too. These are the most dominant that I’m seeing:

Postbox red

Cadbury’s purple

Cobalt blue

Saffron yellow

Paprika

Leaf green

Worked with a selection of these neutrals:

Chocolate

Tan

Warm grey

Warm white

Blush pink

Black

Of course it’s all well and good knowing what the colour trends are but then you need to work out how you’re going to wear them. There are three key ways.

1. Colour blocking

The really eye-catching outfits are the ones that contrast the strong palette to dramatic effect.

Left: funnel neck jumper; blouse; trousers; boots (coming soon)

Centre: Jumper; culottes; boots (coming soon); bag

Right: Jumper; trousers; boots (coming soon);

Left: coat; top; culottes (coming soon); boots (coming soon); bag

Centre: coat; top; culottes; boots (coming soon);

Left: coat; top; culottes; boots (coming soon); bag

2. Tonal

If that feels like too much, the other option is to go tonal. This year neutrals have moved on. Step away from black and grey and pull together the toffee colours that are out there. Add chocolate or grey to give them more depth but unless you have a strong skin-tone, avoid too much black.

While we’re on the subject of black, I’ve told you before about the uber-stylish, Sorbonne-educated style director that I worked with at Selfridges. I once asked her what she saw as the biggest mistake that British women in particular made when it came to style. She surprised me with her answer by saying “wearing colours with black. Black is best kept as part of a monochrome scheme – with grey, ivory or you can stretch it to tan. Of course it doesn’t apply to every British woman but the classic English rose doesn’t have the depth in her colouring that is required to carry off the contrast of schemes such as red and black or bright blue and black. She needs to pair a bright colour with another bright or something softer such as camel, grey, navy or brown.”

Left: coat; jumper (coming soon); skirt

Right: coat; jacket; top; gloves; bag

Jumper (coming soon); satin wrap skirt; sock boots

3. Neutral with a contrast

The final option is to go this way and contrast one of the brights with a warm neutral

Jumper; skirt; coat; maxi scarf; boots

Outfit details

Dress; Bag; Boots

Jumper; Tweed skirt; Boots; Bag

Scarf; checked coat; jumper; wide cropped jeans (coming soon); shoes; bag

Coat; jacket (coming soon); jumper; shirt; trousers; shoes

You can always take baby steps…

I have two posts coming up where I’m setting myself the challenge of putting this winter’s brights together to see how easy it is. In the meantime, your homework is to try to identify a new colour to try this season because it will really update your wardrobe. Even if you decide to take baby steps and begin with an accessory – yellow boots or a scarlet bag – you can’t go wrong with a scarlet bag and… I have some beautiful new bags coming to the Midlifechic Boutique at the end of September.

Outfit details

A big thank you to Dove

Before I go I just want to say a big thank you to Dove for supporting these trend posts. They approached me in the summer to work with them on the launch of Dove Invisible Care, the new deodorant that has been specifically developed for people who love bright clothes. It leaves no white marks on over 100 colours. I discussed this colour trend post with them and they felt it was the perfect fit.

Although it may appear to be a simple post to write, it actually takes ages because rather than just searching online for whatever Pantone have declared to be the colour of the season, I analyse all of the pictures that I take at press days to find the commonalities. This way I can tell you what you’re really going to find on the high street. However it requires a lot of time and our very efficient accounts chap is keeping a beady eye on the hours I take away from my day job and reporting them back to me. So, Dove’s support on this has enabled me to justify it to him!

A deodorant created specifically for people who love wearing colour

Invisible Care is new, I’ve been testing it for the last few weeks and it’s true – even when you roll on the tightest, brightest top there are none of those white stripes down your side. Other great things are that it doesn’t contain any alcohol thus helping your underarm skin to recover from any irritation caused by shaving and it lasts for 48 hours so you’ll even be fragrant when you wake up in the morning.

I’ve always used Dove deodorant and the middle son borrowed it one morning when we were in transit this summer. He said it smelt like safety and rather lyrically explained that it was the fragrance of being picked up and held when he was little. So if he ever makes it as a famous actor and is interviewed by The Times, when he’s asked what reminds him of his mother it won’t be Chanel No 5 – it’ll be Dove!

So, I hope you’ll join me in boosting your autumn wardrobe with some colour. If ever there was a year to do it, it’s this one. I’ll be back on Friday with my first colour filled session where I’ll be playing around with the blues, oranges and yellows that are to be found in the new collection from John Lewis & Partners.

Disclosure: ‘Colour trends Autumn – Winter 18’ was underpinned by Dove Invisible Care whose support enabled me to spend time defining the colours of the season away from the beady eyes of my accountant!

  Colour trends Autumn – Winter 18 and how to work them Ok, so in the second of my new season direction posts, I want to talk about colour trends Autumn - Winter 18.