#i take even the ones i think might be intentional with a grain of salt

[cringefaildiaz]

For clarification, I was a Buddie shipper for the longest time, but because of recent episodes I’ve kinda abandoned ship.

I think that we (tumblr, reddit, Twitter) see the show differently than the general audience. I think there’s a lot of people who dig into things that don’t actually mean anything and call it in the name of Buddie. I shipped them because narratively it made the most sense, but I 100% think the shirt colors/water/beer theories aren’t complete and utter bullshit. Like, I enjoy reading them, but they aren’t anything. These are writers who 1: can’t remember their own details 2: are very open about any sort of metaphor, like the couch thing. The couch metaphor for a relationship was said on screen, it was real. Everything else is grasping. I’m an actor, I’ve gone through costume fittings before, I’ve seen wardrobe trailers, I’ve had a costumer. In a show that’s this expensive and that’s running this long, they will wear the same stuff a few times. Blue and green look best on screen. They can’t use product placement of real items. There’s a lot of reasons for stuff in the show that doesn’t have to do with Buddie and it makes me, and many others, not take Buddie seriously when people say things like “the lightning strike is the baking soda and it’s standing in the way of the beer which is their relationship” Nope. That’s just set dressing and props doing their job. “They made 3 s’mores because one represents Buck!” No… it represents Shannon, that was in the episode.

I also don’t think Buck and Eddie are a slowburn. Or if they are, and this is something they’ve planned out, they’ve done a terrible job. The point of a slowburn is for the audience to see, to feel, to root for the characters to get together. It has to be really obvious that it’s happening, albeit slowly. That it grows and they are so in love, and there’s feelings, and it’s a big will they won’t they. Buck and Eddie had a foundation for this, but the general audience can still call them brothers or platonic friends. Meaning that it’s not clearly romantic and therefore not a slowburn. It could be, if they wanna have Eddie really hate Natalia and openly reveal feelings for Buck even just to himself and let that drive them into season 7, then yes we would have an actual slowburn. It’s not impossible and it’s not too far gone, but if they keep down the path they’re on where it’s tumblr users grasping, it will be.

I also just think they’re writing the characters in circles and until they break out of that, there’s no hope for anything. I mean anything, romantically or not. Buck is currently a headache, at least Eddie seems to be having some growth, but his is also tied to a relationship and people telling him to date and him thinking he has to… ugh

so I actually mostly agree with you, but I think this might be a case of missing the forest for the trees.

I'm definitely with you that a lot of the fandom theories are...not realistic. I'm actually intimately familiar with how wardrobe and costume design operates on shows like 9-1-1 through my job, and I have never in my life heard of wardrobe operating on a set the way fans theorize they do. Not to say that things like color never mean anything, they can absolutely be used very intentionally (and are, by good designers), but they have very different reasons for making choices than what is popularly discussed here. (baby rant on costume metas->on a show like 9-1-1, the most important factor—beyond making your actors look good—is making their wardrobe choices believably human. It's about psychology and fleshing out character; it's rarely about storytelling. What would this real life person have in their closet? How would they choose to present themself in this setting? I'd also say there are some things the fandom DOES pick up on that I read as intentional, but on a show as big as 911, its a little silly to assume every outfit has a deeper meaning)

I also agree with your general point that people read a little too deep into metaphors and symbolism that aren't there on a textual level. You're right that the creators make it VERY obvious when those things are in play—because 911 wasn't a show that was made to be analyzed. Again, not saying that there's nothing to pick up on; I think it's pretty obvious Eddie's on the journey to find his soulmate, and I think it's pretty obvious Natalia isn't Buck's endgame, because they made it clear in the text. But that doesn't mean that every detail is put in to give hints on what's coming. It's a goofy procedural, it's not high art. I don't know how many people really believe those theories vs. how many people just have fun with them (like me), but I get what you're saying about it seeming really silly to anyone outside the bubble.

But re: missing the forest for the trees, I do think it's a little sad to get bogged down by the theories so much that it takes you out of digesting the actual media. You said that you "shipped them because narratively it made the most sense," and I guess I wonder if you don't think it makes narrative sense anymore, or if the popular theories seem so off the wall that you've written off any subtext that's actually coming from the show. And either is fine, but I remain firmly on the "it makes the most narrative sense" side of the aisle, although for more textual reasons than the goofy theories entertain (and I follow a lot of excellent blogs that do the same)

I think that you're really spot on with the slowburn aspect—s2-6a buddie was a developing close friendship, and a beautifully done one in my opinion. But it didn't read to me as romantic while watching casually, it read to me as a really significant platonic partnership. And I so agree that it's a really phenomenal foundation for an actual slowburn. After watching the episode last night, I think that might be the direction they're headed, and I don't think I'd feel that way if not for the couch of it all. But I've said it a few times on here, I don't see any way that this is the final act of their slowburn, because I don't feel there's been any burn yet. The fact that I'm starting to think there might be a reveal to the GA, a real will they/won't they, is what has me so firmly on the buddie canon train right now.

And yeah, Buck going in circles is how I'd put it, too. But as I said it to another anon, I get the feeling that this is the last circle for Buck before his series-long journey for happiness and self worth ends. I actually love the aspect of solving one problem with his perspective only to unearth another, deeper problem, but I can only watch that large man be sad in the exact same way so many times. As for Eddie's dating adventures, I'm feeling like they're making it clear that even though Pepa was the one to push him into it, he is actually interested in finding a partner for the right reasons.

Anyways, seems like we mostly agree and I'm either more optimistic or more delusional than you—only time will tell! Thanks for sharing your thoughts with me

drop your thoughts/theories/speculation on why you don't think buddie will go canon in my ask box because I'm curious (I'll be nice I promise)

I'm tagging all these posts with #anti-buddie and #buddie-neg if you want to filter

[valent1neg0d]

THINGS I WISH I KNEW WHEN I WAS GETTING STARTED WITH THE LAW OF ASSUMPTION (AS SOMEONE WHO HAS BEEN MANIFESTING FOR 5 YEARS)

1. the law of assumption is personal. considering how we have different sets of experiences, different environments, different upbringings, and even different languages, we have different assumptions.

because of this, we are affected by teachings and success stories differently. it's important to note this since a lot of manifestation coaches will teach you about the law in a way that worked for them (and the others they may have taught) but it's possible that their advice (even my own) may not be the best for you. even abdullah and neville goddard, two of the people who are known to start this discipline, may have ancient or varied belief systems and techniques. this is normal considering the world they lived in before is different from the world we live in now.

although, you should still read on abdullah and neville because they will teach you the basics and they will help you understand the foundations of the law.

as an example, you might manifest your dream career faster with simple affirmation techniques but a coach may have taught you to focus on visualization techniques.

even the idea that "dominant THOUGHTS manifest" or "what you BELIEVE in manifests" is entirely up to you.

note: notice how i said "may not be the best for you" instead of "may not work for you". any technique can, does, and will work.

how i learned this: when i was learning about the law, i mainly focused on neville's teachings because he was one of the most prominent figures in the practice. and though i liked his practical techniques (especially mental diet and inner conversations), there were some beliefs that i do not agree with e.g. divine timing, appointed hour, avoiding "does not" "is not" "will not".

when i was going through sammy ingrams' takes, she said that it's better to have concise affirmations/short list (non-verbatim) than a long list of 25+ affirmations. but going through affirmations without being specific about them doesn't personally resonate with me and that's just because i'm a detail-oriented person (also a writer).

what i can advise:

learn about different approaches

a. through scientific concepts. e.g. quantum physics, reticular activating system, cognitive reframing, cognitive behavioral therapy, the psychology of placebo effect, the psychology of affirmations, Baader-Meinhof phenomenon (a.k.a. the psychology of self-fulfilling prophecy)

b. through religious and/or spiritual concepts. e.g. passages from the Bible, passages from the Quran, deity work, spells and rituals

c. through self-development. e.g. identity-based habit

start the practice with an identity you like in the present or an identity that you resonate with (learning style, talents, interests, etc.)

examples:

-visual learner = vision boards

-loves writing = scripting

-words of affection love language = affirmations

take teachings with a grain of salt. do not limit yourself and do not allow other people to limit you. experiment with concepts, ideas, and techniques, and have fun with them.

2. techniques are only reminders. you are manifesting either by thinking, feeling, or acting out your desires. you are manifesting every second of the day either with your thoughts, emotions, or by embodying a state. you are only being intentional when you anchor techniques.

note: it is true that your dominant thoughts manifest. it is also true that what you believe in manifests, the same way that your inner knowing manifests. BUT these ideas are meant to empower you. they are meant to remind you that manifestation is as easy as thinking, feeling, acting, believing, understanding, deciding, etc. if an idea doesn't feel good to you, it doesn't have to be an ultimate truth you embrace and carry on with. this is the same with techniques.

what i can advise:

choose one technique and practice it for 7 to 21 days. it can be mental diet, affirmation tapes, sats, mind movies, etc. as long as you can persist with it. give it time. give it time. give it time. in other aspects of the world, you give change some time. when you're calcium deficient and you decide to drink calcium supplements, you realize that it's counterproductive to ask "why am i still calcium deficient?" as soon as you start your regimen because you know your body is changing with the supplement and you put your trust into it. after all, why would you choose a supplement you have no faith on? you just give it time.

note: you can still manifest changes to be instant. you can affirm "i am seeing results now", "results come immediately", "my manifestation is quick". the amount of time you're using a technique does not equate to the amount of time your results will come.

the reason why i encourage you to practice for maximum 21 days is so you can fully explore and master the technique you chose. with the abundance of topics and methods discussed in social media, switching and trying new things is tempting. now, there is nothing wrong with this. it's just that, you wouldn't be able to take a step back and reflect on what worked and what takes more effort when you change techniques every so often.

try a technique that is popularized in the media. a lot of the times, the reason why this technique gained traction is either because it's simple or because it has worked for a lot of people. now, here's the thing: if said technique wasn't for you, at least you can say "oh this is a tiktok/twitter/youtube/old/beginner technique, there are other techniques out there" and you can try another technique with less resistance. but, if it did work, then it did. congratulations.

you can invent your own. here are some techniques that i invented throughout the years.

a. "name is set and solid with the fact that..." - works amazing for sp, getting people to commit, getting people to pursue you

b. "okay! manifestation powers go brrr!" - funny but i do this when I'm spiraling; it also helps me surrender doubts and i think it's because it's so simple and unserious lmao

you can combine them. for example, you want to do sats but you cannot hold a vision for long, what you can do is montage photos or videos that is similar to the vision you want to manifest. you can also have affirmation tapes running in the background.

3. "concept" work can be such a banger. assumptions are basically the conception about the world, about yourself, about the people around you. hence, when you manifest and apply the law of assumption, you change or reinforce a conception.

these can be done through:

self-concept

what it is: your awareness about yourself; the way you perceive yourself.

how you can apply it: there are multiple ways to establish your self-concept but the best way, is to start reinforcing the universal truth: that you are inherently worthy. you deserve money and resources because you are worthy. you deserve love because you are worthy. you deserve ease because you are worthy.

other ways to grow your self-concept is celebrating the identities you have within yourself that you like e.g. that you are strong, you are disciplined, you are beautiful. be careful about strongly tying yourself into these identities though because these are not the reasons why you shall receive. again, you shall receive because you are inherently worthy.

why it works: by having a strong self-concept, you develop ease. you are less likely to rationalize or question the law or why you deserve the things you're asking for. and as you may think, rationalizing may be a form of resistance. questioning may be a form of resistance.

one of the ways i have seen this is when people receive incentives from work, instead of just receiving or saying "thank you", they say things like "what have i done to receive this?", sometimes completely rejecting this gift because of fear that they might lose something when they receive. this can be an example of a weak self-concept. consequently, the company starts questioning "did my employer really do enough to receive this?".

on the other hand, someone with a strong self-concept can take this incentive and buy the things they like because they know they deserve it. they can also take this incentive and say to themselves "oh it's because i worked hard these past few days". it's the knowing and confidence they have within themselves that everything around them has no other option but to recognize.

conception of other things (e.g. of love, of money, of a specific person)

you can work on your conception of other things the same way you work on your self-concept: choosing a narrative that is uplifting to you.

in case you have resistance to a specific object, you can also listen to people's success stories to start shifting to a more positive and desirable perception. one of the ways i do this is by going back to abdullah and neville's story. these two men lived at difficult times, through difficult eras, yet they manifested their desires. they managed to let go of the 3D.

4. practice some distance as you're starting. you were exposed to a different life before the law, it's only normal and human to have doubts or spiral once in a while. however, when you set distance on things that do not help you embody the state, you set distance on things that will feed your doubts and spiraling.

for example, if you're shifting to a state of wealth and you're affirming "i have 1,000 dollars". it's unhelpful and opposing to be constantly surrounded by someone else saying "you only have 10 dollars".

now, i do understand that not everyone can do this right away because of circumstances. but PLEASE do whatever you can to set this distance. find a voice to reinstate your truth.

a personal story, i am an asian girl living with a grandmother who was pessimistic about love because her two children (my mom and my aunt) struggled with it. because of this, she used to constantly remind me of how love is difficult. i didn't know this at the time, but this created a set of beliefs in my head. consequently, as a teenager, i only seeked and allowed love which was difficult because that was all i've ever known. that was all my assumption.

but around the pandemic, i went back to the countryside with my dad where i had a lot of time on my own. this was when i got deep into new-age spirituality and did shadow work. from here, i realized: this is not my assumption about love. before my parents broke up, my assumption was that love is easy. you only have to make the other person laugh. when i was busy in school and would spend most of the time at my friend's house, my assumption was that love is support and light. i started to get these epiphanies that a lot of my pessimistic perception was because of someone i was constantly surrounded with and that i have to build new assumptions.

but around august 2020, i have to go back to the city with my grandmom. i was afraid of the toll i might get into when i got back. however, because i already practiced distance and understood what are the assumptions that serve me, what are the assumptions that i want, i was more at peace. i listed down affirmations about myself, about love, about money, about being "deserving".

after this, every time she told me what love was, i can stop her and say no. i can tell her that it's not the universal truth, and certainly not mine. along the way, i started manifesting that she believes love is easy and supportive. i started manifesting that she believes i deserve love that is soft and tender.

then, when i got into my relationship, she was nothing but happy and supportive.

other ways i have practiced distance while manifesting:

unfollowing content creators who normalized hating men.

unfollowing content creators who were shady and negative about relationships.

unfriending highschool guy friends who do not make me feel safe about men.

unfriending relatives who make unnecessary comments about my looks, my studies, my relationship, and my earnings.

unfollowing girls who made me feel bad about also liking girls.

unfollowing manifestation gurus who romanticize struggles because "the more you struggle, the more you get blessed"

unfollowing manifestation gurus who say stuff like "if you want money, you have to take action to deserve it. not just manifesting"

now, you can totally manifest these people to change and be better, as long as it will make you feel good.

that's all i can share today (since this post is already getting long). i hope you learned a thing or two. thank you so much for reading. i love you and i appreciate you !

xo

[techmomma]

whilst I am sick in bed, I want to put something out here before things start getting wild with conspiracy theories about this whole submersible debacle. because I think we will start seeing a lot of conspiracy theories starting up. some irrational, but some rational!

also note that I have no educated experience on these matters, just 33 years of living and a special interest in both the titanic and maritime disasters. so take everything with a grain of salt(water).

and while yes, if they’re dead, I genuinely think every navy and coast guard already knows and has known since like the first three hours since the sub went missing, I also genuinely do not think this was out of malicious or subversive intent, or trying to hide some big secret, and I will explain why:

underwater explosions/implosions make a very characteristic sound. this is called a bubble pulse: multiple booms being the result of initial explosion, followed by water pressure collapsing the gas bubble.

the major powers of the world, certainly the US with SOSUS/IUSS, have underwater listening stations. this is a system of underwater hydrophones and listening devices originally meant to track soviet submarine activity and underwater nuclear tests. this system was already quite powerful in the 60s, and its capabilities by now in the 2020s are classified but likely even moreso powerful. this is not me saying THEY’RE LISTENING TO US AND PUTTING TRACKERS IN US this is me saying “by the early 90s they could track a single whale over the entire Pacific for several years.”

if the submersible imploded--and I am leaning toward it not being built well enough to withstand four days of 375 atmospheres worth of pressure--then this was almost undoubtedly heard by listening stations across the atlantic

so why not tell the public?

despite having declassified much of the program, SOSUS/IUSS still has many parts that remain classified. to reveal that they heard the implosion would be to also reveal potentially delicate information such as station positions (figuring out WHERE a classified station might be based on the fact that it picked up the sound, and figuring out the minimum capabilities of such a system).

we’re already in kind of a weird proxy war with the Russians, again, so the government’s paranoia about not letting anything leak to them Russkies is, again, at an all-time high. I will state though that classified information is actually like, at the bottom of my list of “reasons why they may not have said anything immediately.”

this is an incredibly... unique situation. while I have no doubt they heard the implosion, they may not have been able to concretely confirm that it was an implosion, and an implosion of a civilian submersible, until after the story of the missing sub had already gotten out to the public. one of those “it looked like a duck and quacked like a duck so I’m pretty sure it was a goddamn duck, but I technically need to run tests to make 100% certain that it was in fact a duck, because if I’m wrong that could mean big trouble.”

in addition, to 100% confirm an implosion, typically the debris field has to be actually spotted on the sea floor, in addition to all the previous criteria being met. they have been trying to find a debris field... in a bigger, messier debris field.

they need to do this, because if there’s even a .0000000001% chance that they are still alive and you left them for dead, that would be... bad, for a lot of reasons

because the debris field has not been found and there IS a .0000001% chance that they could be alive, they still need to TREAT it as a rescue operation. this is standard procedure for like. everywhere.

even if they WERE still alive, they were going to die. every rescue party out there right now knows this. just planning to recover debris from that depth often takes months if not years of planning, let alone a sub about to run out of air in four days, max. in these situations, where the rescuers know the victims are alive but will, without fail, die, you have to still TREAT IT as if they are able to be saved (while also, quietly, making sure no one else is going to be further hurt). for the sake of the victims, their families, and the public at large. for the basic dignity of the victims. yes, out of compassion.

a comparable situation is when an EMT arrives to the scene of a traffic accident and knows, immediately, that this person, while not technically dead, is absolutely not going to make it. the EMT is still going to attempt to do everything they can to save that person, for their dignity and for the slim chance that maybe, by some miracle, they can help. you don’t give up until you know they’re actually dead. this is standard procedure and also like. a basic human compassion thing.

this is also likely why, if you’ve been watching any news about this, we’ve not seen any illustrations of “potential ways to rescue the sub,” or how authorities think they might do it, only diagrams and illustrations of where the sub might be or the depth it might be at. ideas have been floated around, but nothing concrete. because there is nothing concrete. at least, that’s what I’ve seen but that’s probably confirmation bias.

so yeah. in the coming days or years or whatever, I think it’ll come out that rescuers have known all along what happened and kept that little part quiet. but I also think it’s for the most boring, mundane reasons possible: standard procedure technicalities and human compassion while having to navigate a sticky situation between the media and the public.

[heliads]

Theo raeken x fem!reader, theo confessing to reader but being rejected cause of all the stuff he did to the pack

a theo request?? anon god bless i miss him

masterlist

The first thing Stiles Stilinski says upon sprinting down the hallway to stop immediately in front of you, is, “Theo Raeken is going to kill us all again.”

The second thing Stiles tells you, without a single pause after the first nor one word of explanation, is, “And it’s all your fault.”

Stiles is prone to drama. He’s a lovely boy, sure, you’ve been his friend since you were a kid, and you’ve counted on him to save your life from the millions of dangers all living in the home you both call Beacon Hills, but you’ve learned to take pronouncements like these with a grain of salt.

So, instead of losing your mind with worry like you did the first dozen times Stiles approached you with yet another rumor of death and danger, you just smile, put the last of your books in your locker, and shut the door. Once you take a breath or two, you turn to face him at last.

“Good morning, Stiles,” you say pointedly, “How good to see you again. How was your weekend? Oh, you’re spouting off about another crazy theory? So good to hear! I know you’re going to tell it to me nicely, and you definitely won’t try to do something weird like blame me for it. That would be ridiculous, don’t you think?”

Stiles has the grace to look at least a little needled, but he still stands firm. “I’m not kidding, Y/N. We’re about to get hit by Hurricane Theo, Round Two, and when we’re all bloody, broken corpses, I’ll be having the last laugh.”

You frown. “I thought we would all be dead. How can you be laughing if we’re all bloody, broken corpses like you said?”

Stiles waves a hand irritably. “That’s why it would be the last laugh, idiot. I would rub it in your face then immediately pass away. Anyway, you’re not focusing.”

“I am focusing,” you argue, “I have been focusing on Theo Raeken for a while now. We all have.”

Stiles groans. “He’s going to try to topple our pack again, though. Look, I’ve been watching him for a while, and I know it. I can feel it. And I was right about him the first time, right? Even when you all doubted me, I was right. I’m going to be right again.”

As much as you’d like to have some snappy little comeback, you can’t deny that Stiles totally hit the nail on the head with Theo the first time around. Back when Theo Raeken returned to Beacon Hills for the first time in years, everyone in the McCall pack had been more than willing to welcome him with open arms. Only Stiles had second thoughts about the guy, and Stiles was proven right when Theo tried to kill Scott and take over the rest of you.

Now, though, you’re all aware of Theo’s twisted intentions. There’s no doubt in any of your minds that he’s still scheming, but for now, he’s been holding back. Nothing has happened to alert anyone’s suspicions more than usual, yet Stiles seems dead set in his latest theory.

You sigh and start to walk down the hallway, Stiles by your side. “Fine, then. What makes you think he’s going to pick today to attack?”

“Well, it might not be today,” Stiles admits. “Soon, though. This I promise. And I’m not just making stuff up, Y/N. He’s been acting differently. He even talked to me about it.”

You arch a brow. “You let Theo get close enough to talk?”

“Not willingly, but he wouldn’t leave me alone until I did,” Stiles grumbles.

You have to bite back a laugh. You can picture exactly how that conversation went– Stiles doggedly avoiding Theo as long as he could, Theo just a few paces behind until Stiles gave in and let him speak. Stiles hates Theo’s guts, which is understandable, considering Theo tried to murder his best friend, so whatever Theo had to say must have been important to risk Stiles’ wrath.

Now that you’re finally listening, though, Stiles is holding back the crucial information. He really is so dramatic when he wants to be, isn’t he?

You wave your hand irritably. “Alright, then. Get on with it. What did he say?”

Stiles huffs out a breath at getting rushed like this, but his face turns serious soon enough. “Well, that’s the thing. He wasn’t really telling me anything. In fact, the only thing he really did was ask me about you.”

A pause looms between you. You’re no wolf, but you swear you can hear every conversation happening up and down this hall, how the words echo in your head. It’s easier to pick apart everyone else’s idle chatter instead of comprehending what Stiles has just told you.

“He asked about me? That makes no sense. I’m human, Stiles. What would he want with me?”

Stiles swats you on the shoulder. “Hey, as, like, one of the only other humans here, we’ve got to be proud of ourselves. We have value. I don’t know why he asked, though. He didn’t mention pack stuff or anything. He just wanted to know how you were doing, if you were busy after school or something.”

Your eyes widen. “You don’t think he’s trying to kill me after we get out of class or something? What did you tell him?”

“I’m already a step ahead,” Stiles assures you. “I said you were totally busy and we wouldn’t let you near any of his traitorous pack without the rest of us there to keep you safe. He seems kind of put off by that, but he said that he wasn’t trying to kill you.”

“That’s exactly what someone who’s trying to kill me would say,” you point out.

“Tell me about it. I don’t think he’ll try anything today, at least not at school, but be careful, alright? Don’t go anywhere without one of us. I don’t like this.” Stiles says.

You shiver. “I don’t like it either.”

Theo’s attention never ends well. And, when the two of you turn a corner, you glance over your shoulder and see that someone else has taken your spot at your locker. He’s not trying to open it, just leaning against the metal. He raises a hand in greeting when he sees you looking. It’s Theo Raeken, and judging by the proud smile on his face, he knows exactly who you’re talking about.

You can’t focus throughout that class, nor the next. Theo Raeken is dangerous. He played all of you except Stiles like a fiddle the first time he was trying to kill Scott. What’s to stop him from trying to do it again? Or, worse, what’s to stop him from trying to do it to you?

You stop by your locker later that day. You had just managed to put the morning’s incident from your mind, but when you unlock the door to find a note pushed inside, it all comes rushing back. The paper inside carries no threats, but you still feel your blood run cold when you read it.

Meet me outside after the school day ends. T.R.

You show Scott and the others at lunch. None of them like it either. Scott agrees with Stiles in telling you to never go out alone, and certainly not to meet Theo like he asked. This has to be a trap. There’s no way it could be anything else.

You’re perfectly fine with that plan, but, as it turns out, it’s a little easier said than done. You end up staying a little while after class to ask a teacher a few questions about an upcoming exam, and when you emerge into the empty hallway once more, it occurs to you that you forgot to tell anyone that you were staying after. It’s not that any one of the pack would intentionally abandon you, especially not after the shift in Theo’s attention today, but they all would have assumed that someone else was with you, and left it at that.

Now, you’re wandering the school alone, listening to the sound of your footsteps echo off of the walls and wondering if he’s waiting for you somewhere. Your phone is in your hand, ready to text one of your friends to pick you up, but you don’t live far from school. It won’t take that long to get home, not if you hurry. You’re certain you can avoid him if you try.

Glancing around to make sure he’s not lingering by the door, you set out into the sunlight. Your footsteps are quick, hurrying around corners and down the sidewalk, but, as it turns out, not quick enough. Then again, how could you ever think you could outpace him? You’re human. Theo is a chimera. He could sprint down the length of your neighborhood in the time it takes you to blink.

You wait for the inevitable– claws in your throat, perhaps, or a knife in your back, something Theo-like and unavoidable, but he doesn’t kill you. Not yet. Instead, Theo Raeken walks next to you, tilts his head up to the blue afternoon sky, and says, “It’s a nice day out, isn’t it?”

You blink. Of all the ways you expected this encounter to end, talking to Theo about the weather was just about last on your list. “What?”

Theo shrugs. “It’s warm out. I don’t know.”

He still seems nice, which is weird, obviously. To be honest, this abrupt change in his usual demeanor is freaking you out more than if he’d just been his normal, scheming, threatening self. At least then you wouldn’t be waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“What do you want, Theo?” You ask at last. “Are you here to kill me or not?”

Theo glances over at you, looking genuinely surprised. “What are you talking about? I would never kill you. Y/N, I could never hurt you. You know that.”

He’s not entirely wrong. During his attempted toppling of the McCall pack, Scott nearly died, and many of you were injured, but Theo never touched so much as a hair on your head. Truth be told, back when he was still pretending to be good, you liked him a lot. He won you over fast, probably faster than he should have. Still, that was then, and this is now. You’re both on opposite sides of a war, and that sort of gulf cannot be easily crossed by anything. Least of all by you.

“Fine. Are you trying to use me to hurt the pack?”

Theo scoffs. “They’re trying to convince you to see the worst in me. I’m not surprised, to be honest. I’m not here to hurt you, Y/N, not in any way. I’m here because I want to take you on a date.”

You stop walking. This is absurd. You wait for him to start laughing or something, call an end to the joke, but he doesn’t. He just pauses by your side. “What time can I pick you up?” He continues, as if nothing has been said at all.

“Never,” you manage, “We’re not going on a date, Theo.”

He frowns. “Why not? If you’re busy this week, I can wait. It’s fine.”

“No, we can’t reschedule, because it’s not happening. You tried to murder Scott. You’re still trying to take over our pack. Why would I go on a date with you?”

Theo lifts a shoulder. “Because you like me. And don’t try to argue, Y/N, I know you do. You liked me well enough before I started moving forward with my plans.”

This, again, is a little closer to the truth than you’d like to admit. Theo was wonderful before he tried to murder everyone you hold dear. He was charming and funny. He partnered with you in class, he helped you study, he walked home with you after school. He was perfectly lovely until you burst into the Beacon Hills High School library one day to find him standing over Scott’s corpse.

“I might have, but that’s over now, Theo. I can’t love someone who tried to kill my friends. End of story.”

Theo shakes his head, brown hair flying around his eyes, which have taken on a glint almost akin to madness. “That’s the noble thing to do, sure, but you don’t have to be noble. We don’t have to be noble. It’s just you and me, Y/N. We don’t need any of them. Come on, you can’t tell me that you don’t want this.”

He says every word with such certainty that you know he believes it. You understand now why he was able to rally the other chimeras behind him, why even Liam was able to fall for his scheming. Theo is someone you want to believe. Always.

Always, even when you know better. Especially when you know better. You take a subtle step back, then two. “I can’t do this, Theo. Even if I went out with you, I’d be wondering if you were going to stab me in the back the entire time. I can’t trust you.”

His face falls. “But you want this. You want me.”

“I do,” you admit, “but that doesn’t make it right.”

He goes quiet. You wait for him to shout or swear or something like the monster you’ve been hearing so much about, but instead, he just looks towards where you were walking again. “Can I at least walk you home?”

You nod. “You remember where to go?”

“Of course,” he answers simply.

He could just recall where you live because you’re a part of the McCall pack and he needs a target. A second, calmer voice somewhere in the back of your head whispers that maybe, just maybe, it is because of you.

The walk back is quiet, but not terrible. You’re both thinking through a grave number of things. When you finally reach your house, Theo stops and faces you in front of the door. “Just–” he breaks off, then manages to finish it. “Think about it. If I were better, would you think about it?”

You let out a low breath. “Yes, Theo, I would.”

He almost smiles. “Goodbye, Y/N.”

“Goodbye, Theo,” you whisper back, and watch as he turns and leaves your house once more. 

It will be a long time before you can trust him for sure. You have no doubt that he’s got something else up his sleeve. Theo Raeken doesn’t strike you as the kind to give up easily. But then again, that’s why you’re still thinking of him even after he disappears from sight. Maybe, just maybe, Theo will do good on what he asked of you. Maybe, if he was better, he would come back. Until then, you’ll watch, and you’ll wait, and perhaps one day, you’ll be able to say yes after all.

teen wolf tag list: @mayfieldss, @rogueanschel, @lovesanimals0000, @rafecameronswhore, @bellabadacadabra, @watchreadfangirlrepeat, @23victoria

all tags list: @wordsarelife

[blackfilmmakers]

I am convinced Wish straight up stole the story from the Stardust episode in Kizazi Moto: Generation Fire. How so?

-A gathering ceremony of a man called the Oracle granting “destinies” to people that become of age

-Setting is set in a North African region (Egypt most likely) and the MC(Nawara) is most likely Amazigh. This is based on her design, and what I’ve seen Amazigh people tend to wear-take my words with a grain of salt. But even if that is not the case, Nawara’s design shares similarities with Asha’s concept art

-Similar tower observatory structure because the Oracle, like Magnifico, look into astrology for their source of power

-An MC that approaches the Oracle for the intention for her own ambitions being granted

-The MC feels wronged when denied their wishes/destinies, and plans to steal them

-There is great emphasis on a fallen Star. Stars in general, but mainly this particular “wishing Star”

-She becomes the apprentice of the Oracle(he’s not actually a villain, but alluded to be). Hey Remember when Asha applied to be an assistant, and that was never explored on what they do?

-The story is essentially telling you that you can make your own wishes/destinies come true

-Literally has Nawara end the short saying “nothing but this!” (Look at lyrics of This Wish)

Taking into account that Kizazi Moto is region locked with Disney+ (I don’t think most African countries can even watch it), and that Disney barely advertised the show, I would not be surprised they scrapped everything they originally had, just to poorly mimic this story. There are just way too many similarities between these two for it all to be a coincidence

Kizazi Moto has been in development for years btw, so yes it is possible for Disney to steal aspects of the premise for Wish

It would explain why Wish’s characters and plot barely get any development and just feel empty. This one short was able to immerse us in a finished world building perspective. The city in Stardust actually feels magical, and the MC changes by the end of the story. Feel like the reason Wish failed in these aspects is partly because they tried to mimic Stardust, but divorced it from its own lore and context. And so you just have a movie of nothing

Disney has always had a habit of stealing works from others to make profit. Remember when they tried to copyright Hakuna Matata?

I’m already mad they hardly advertised Kizazi Moto to begin with, but now I am more mad at the fact that an 8 min short did Wish better in every aspect, and it’s probably because Wish stole these concepts from African animators like Ahmed Teliab(directed and written Stardust)

And there are other cool episodes in Generation Fire, I would appreciate y’all checking out. African animators and writers hardly get any recognition for their talents.

Even if Wish really didn’t steal this episode’s concepts, again, Stardust does everything better than Wish in every way

Conclusion: Go watch Kizazi Moto, but yknow pirate it. They don’t even show the series in African countries anyways. You might as well look into their works, and support them. The company supporting a genocide with some of those African countries, ain’t going to care about them

[overandundertarot]

How can you release this anger?

Recently, I've come to the realisation that I hold quite a lot of pent up anger without even knowing how to release it. I think this reading could be helpful to people who may be in a similar position, or just experiencing pent up emotions and are unsure how they could release this or start that process of transforming those emotions, if they want to.

Piles 1-4(left to right)

Pile 1

Cards; 6 of wands, Knight of swords.

Believe in yourself pile one! There is self doubt here, and pride brought about by trying to conceal insecurity. Act on your thoughts. A lot of this anger is towards yourself. I feel like you are perfectionists, and you dont like when you are not perfect according to your standards. Well, there's nothing you can do about that. You either have to develop yourself till you feel you're perfect enough( which will take quite a while and you may never reach your lofty aspirations for yourself) or take action now on whatever it is you want to do. I'm getting that it's not even related to the material world, but your personality or creative interests. You may feel like you are not the person that you should be, but instead of practicing any self development activities, you just spend alot of time having self deprecating thoughts. You may not be where you want to be, but that does not mean that you can never get there. Appreciate yourself for what you have and what you can do and allow yourself to indulge in your hobbies/ interests with less judgement.

Pile 2

Cards; The Sun, 2 of Swords, Page of Pentacles.

In any case pile 2, youre not supposed to be making a decison right now. Good things and opportunities are coming to you now but its overwhelming. I think that is where this anger is coming from, because you can't allow yourself to fully enjoy the present moment and be connected to your spirituality. So you are angered because you have a lot but it is still not enough. You have to force yourself to enjoy what you have right now pile 2, because all of the planning and deciding and moving forward is being used as a distraction. Of course, take this with a grain of salt and don't put your life on hold to try and attempt this. Start small, think about things in your daily life and what use they provide for you, do you appreciate them enough? Be in the present moment and appreciate what you have worked for. Some of you are also angered by the fact that you might not be able to find a direction in life. It will come in time; try to be connected with your desires and intentions so when the opportunity arises, you can make a decision that will trully make you happy.

Pile 3

Cards; The Emperor reversed, King of cups.

Your anger may stem from the fact that you may have never fit into society, particularly that you may have been too sensitive for other peoples tastes. Some of you may be a part of the lgbtq community as well. The way you express yourself garnered much criticism and you may care about issues that society doesn't like to face such as animal rights, environmentalism and child abuse. Emotional issues, childhood trauma. A lot of the people in this pile have heavily feminine energy, regardless of their gender. The way for pile 3 to release their anger would be to develop ways of managing their emotions. Unfortunately, the world is unlikely to change but we can find ways to regulate our emotions and work through our traumas so that we can be less affected by the harshness of society. Also, try to channel your anger and pain into creative pursuits such as writing, and even consuming more media concerning these issues that affect you. It may help you feel seen and understood.

Pile 4

Cards; The Tower reversed, Justice.

Pile 4 you have been resisting change for a while. By not allowing it to crumble, you have become a prisoner of the tower. Your anger is brought about by you not allowing yourself to feel your emotions fully. You're not letting go of something that happened in the past, or you're trying to keep a steady hold on your life right now, but it's failing. You can't control everything. To release this anger, accept what happened and move on. Take responsibility for your actions, what happened was a result of past actions and you can't change those. You either accept what happened, move on and try to create a better future for yourself, or stay in that tower and torment yourself forever. That sounded a bit dramatic but the messages coming through are quite firm, whatever happened you have to accept it and move on.

***

Thank you for participating in this Pick a Card reading!

I hope it gave you some insight for your situation. Please dont hesistate to give any feedback you may have regarding this reading!

[lets-try-some-writing]

This is a theory and you can take this as a grain of salt, since I know in grim dark archive au the story and headcannons will be completely different. I still can’t wait for the update 😉!

In grim dark archive, I can’t help but think there might a sprinkle of Papa Unicron au in this, except with much more darker implications. In this au, I feel that Unicron does care about humanity, but his feelings are more eldritich-like that would scare the cybertronians and even humans themselves. Think of it like this, since the beginning of the universe there were multiple forces that were chaos, order, creation, and destruction. Unicron and Primus weren’t the only powerful beings in the universe (I bet there were multiple more powerful cosmic entities), but since they were “brothers” and the antithesis to each other. They constantly battled each other for control and order (Primus) or for chaos and change (Unicron). Until Primus had the idea to create the cybertronians to defeat his brother. Meanwhile Unicron would devour planets to not only to gain more power, but to ensure his brother’s creations, don’t spread across the universe. The battle ended with both of them stuck in stasis as planets, while Primus was conscious and controlling the cybertronians, creating a caste system and keeping his favorites in power. Unicron was unconscious and his signals were kept low keeping him hidden from his brother. During his time being unconscious, cells come into contact with dark energon, did life on Earth began to take form. As humans began to evolve, Unicron was able to connect his mind to the billions of minds of the humans living on top of him, and experienced the chaos that happened daily to a human lifespan and how that chaos changes a person’s personality as they grow.

Without a rival to fight against or to subjugate Cybertron began to stagnate and looked within to sate those desires only to create a war that wiped out a huge number of their population and made the planet half dead. While across the galaxy Unicron is living through the lives of a billion humans on Earth.

The difference between the cybertronians and the humans, was that Primus created the cybertronians as tools with the intention of using them to carry out his will in the universe while Unicron unintentionally created humans with no other purpose than to live. To live vicariously through humans and experience their emotions of joy and anger, to feel what motivates them to keep fighting, how one’s own choices sets them on their own path in life, to feel the bonds of love hate, to feel the ravages of time as once strong bodies grow feeble yet wise from their own life experience. I could only image how pissed he would be if a creation of Primus tries to destroy what he sees an extension of himself.

You are on the right track with your idea here! The whole point of my Grim Dark Archives thing is to really drive home how ALIEN these robots are. Its not quite shattered glass, so Unicron is still not going to be the kindest of beings. But with that said, neither is Primus. Those two deities have an interesting attachment to their creations that walks the fence of actual parental affection and the care one would have for a favorite tool or toy.

One more little detail I will throw out is simply that Primus is not a particularly kind creator in this au. He is more than willing to fuel the fires of his will at the expense of another, especially those most loyal to him.

I hope to get back to The Grim Dark Archives soon, and when I do, I hope you like what I come up with!

[qqueenofhades]

Think what strikes me about something like "we can't vote because the system is rigged! Ban the electoral college!" is the big underlying implication of it.

That there is no multiple solutions or paths, only the one correct path and everything else is worthless.

And that's incredibly frustrating because there are two levels of problems with it:

is the utter dismissiveness of anything other than their specific solution, which ignores how any degree of positive change cannot occur with only just ONE idea, it's usually the result of many ideas that lead to change.

The fact that it feels like they're skipping every step in between the current situation to this end result, or actively fixating on themselves having the correct solution, but only by literally getting everything in between completely wrong in the process.

Like, the latter point in particular is like a complex math equation: Just because you got the right answer doesn't mean you can just ignore every difficult step in between, or just assume that all of the WRONG processes become validated retroactively because you stumbled into the correct answer. You'd literally get failed and be forced to redo the problem if you tried that shit in math.

I saw a poll the other day claiming that support for abolishing the Electoral College had now reached 65% of all Americans. Now, I take all polls, whether good or bad, with a grain of salt, but this does reflect a growing awareness that the EC is a horrible racist anti-democratic dinosaur only applied to the presidential election and only used for electing Republicans who don't win the nationwide popular vote, and that there's a genuine groundswell of support to abolish it. See the National Popular Vote Interstate Compact, which could possibly collect enough state-by-state ratifications to go into effect into 2028 (in the best-case scenario). So even all the bitching about how "the system is rigged" (which. WE KNOW! WE KNOW! There's not a single Democratic voter going to vote like WOW I LOVE THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE CAN'T WAIT FOR MY VOTE TO DEPEND ON HOW MUCH IT COUNTS THANKS TO THE ELECTORAL COLLEGE WHEE OLD DEAD WHITE GUYS!) blatantly ignores that a possible seismic change IS possibly in the offing, because people put in the work to make it happen!!! The fact that the EC might soon be superseded or disempowered is FUCKING MONUMENTALLY HUGE!!! It has existed literally since the beginning of America and arbitrated every single presidential election!!! And let me tell you, the people working to make that change and fundamentally reshape American democracy are absolutely not the Online Leftists, whose grasp of civic and political theory starts and ends at "wah the system is rigged I do not vote I am very smart!"

This also reminds me of the recent idiots in my notes complaining that Biden was a) not "genuine" in supporting the striking auto workers, that b) Don't You Know He Broke The Rail Strike (the follow-up where he gave the railworkers what they most wanted with that strike was conveniently never mentioned), or c) that he wasn't "doing it for the right reasons" (whatever the fuck that means). Which accurately reflects their belief that the way you do politics, or praxis, or anything at all, is just by having the Really Goodest Mostest Purest Intentions really hard, and that's it. Like. Aside from the fact that it's impossible to prove why Biden is privately motivated to do anything, we have a long track record demonstrating that he is a person of genuine Catholic faith who has been moving more and more to the left overall, and has been the most pro-union, pro-labor president in American history. So first of all, complaining that "he's not GENUINE!!!!" in supporting the strikers is impossible to prove, and contradicted by actual evidence. But the Online Leftists gotta feel More Gooder Than Him somehow, so.

Likewise: as I said in one of my previous posts about Hillary Clinton: I do not give a fuck if she was privately the most Neoliberal Corporate Centrist Shill Ever To Shill (and as I also said, none of those words means what the Online Leftists think they do). I do not care about the American monarch president's personal feelings, unless they reflect directly on the policy that they make and the real-world effects that it has. I don't care if Clinton killed puppies (or dreamed about killing puppies, which for the thoughtcrime police is equally bad), as long as she appointed 3 new liberal justices to SCOTUS and throughout the courts, instead of the hacks that Trump forced onto the bench and literally everything else he did. In the same vein, Biden could secretly be like "hahahaha fuck all workers BIG CORPORATIONS FOR LYFE but I gotta support the workers and get them their rights so they'll vote 4 meeee" (not that I actually think he is, but still) and hold onto your hankies, children: I DO NOT CARE! Because the tangible real-world effects of that policy that he is working hard on making results in a better economy for those workers and substantial redistribution of capital away from the oligarchs for the first time in a generation! Not to mention, I kind of like the idea that a president decides to make himself most appealing to workers instead of bosses! But for the Online Leftists, if this action isn't done with the Sufficiently Pure Motives, it is Wrong and Bad and Not Good Enough and Blah Blah Biden Sekrit Republican.

Anyway. Yes. That. The end.

[meruz]

hello! i'm a big fan of your work! i noticed youre a risd alumnus, and i just wanted to ask: as someone currently working in the animation industry, how was your experience with risd? i'm having to choose between risd and a school that's popular specifically for animation, and was wondering if you might have any info that could help.

thank you, i hope this ask isn't any bother!

ooh I actually love this question because theres SO MUCH I wish I knew about the RISD animation program ahead of time and I'd love to give people a better idea than the one I had going in LOL. disclaimer that because I went a while ago (a whole class of college students have come and gone since I've graduated!) some of this info may be outdated. also this is purely my personal experience. BUT hopefully it helps

I want to say upfront that I loved my experience at RISD. I attended from the years 2013-2017. Like all private art colleges it was way too expensive (worth noting I had a significant need-based scholarship) but I worked my ass off and I learned a lot about art and I made friends there that I wouldn't trade for the world. As far as an art school experience goes I would tentatively say it was "worth it". However, I went in as a freshman hoping to major in animation and I came out with a BFA in illustration and this is a large part of why: RISD doesn’t have a good animation program for those looking to go into commercial animation. And I don’t think this is a grand statement like I think most of my fellow alum and teachers would agree. The thing is it’s kind of intentional LOL?? And the keyword here of course is “commercial”. Culturally, RISD is kind of a fine arts school first and I wouldn’t say they’re hostile towards industry work but it’s more often treated as secondary or like something unfortunate/dirty you have to do to make money so you can focus more on your “true art”. I have a tweet about this that went semi-viral a while ago actually…

I’m not gonna say everyone at RISD thinks this but it’s pretty prevalent. I'm honestly not outside the opinion lol. You can call it integrity or pretentiousness or whatever but without going into whether this is good or bad it really orients the curriculum and priorities of the school. It’s hearsay so take it with a grain of salt but I’ve heard that on occasions where RISD has been offered opportunities or partnerships to make the school into a pipeline for big studios (like making work specifically to cater to those places and funnel students through the door right after school) they’ve always stuck to their guns and said no to preserve their independence. 

The animation program at RISD is actually called FAV (sometimes stylized as F/A/V) for Film Animation Video and is… as one would guess..a mishmash of animation, film, and experimental video. Multimedia, experimental work is highly encouraged and overall the work and structure is a lot more geared towards submitting independent short films to film and animation festivals than it is towards building a portfolio to secure industry or client work. I didn’t major in FAV but I was on the FAV thesis track for about 3 years and I’d say the amount of help I had making an animation industry portfolio from my experience with FAV classes is close to none. At least for the thesis program we were never required or even asked to do anything such as design character turnarounds, bg designs or paint, even storyboards. And to be fair a lot of that pre-prod work that fills industry portfolios is a necessity of large commercial crews that need to coordinate over disparate departments and studios, not so much for independent single-animator projects. 

But as a result, a lot of RISD students with ambitions to go into animation/video games/ entertainment industry art in general actually major in illustration. Myself included. It’s not a perfect 1:1 match and even within the department there’s conflict as to whether there should be more of a focus on traditional editorial illustration or otherwise but it’s one of the broadest majors at RISD because past sophomore year it’s 100% electives and there’s more classes oriented towards technical drawing and painting skill, concept, story, and communication for client work in a very all of which funnel rather neatly into commercial animation. It’s also a good route for exploring your options like if you’re stuck between wanting to do children’s books, TCG paintings, and comic books you can explore all those at more or less the same time. The downside to this is that in order to get what you want you really have to build your own curriculum. I definitely think it rewards the proactive.

So while nothing at RISD got me to build an animation portfolio I took a lot of classes that I think were fundamental to developing those skills. Ie I did actually take a storyboarding elective, painting classes that focused on color, illustration concepts classes that formed critical thinking and seeing, a sculpting class that trained anatomy and 3d construction skills, Barbara Meier teaches a 3D animation class at Brown that RISD students can cross-enroll at that’s pretty good? None of these are substitutes for a holistic animation curriculum but I think the education I did get was a lot broader and just as personally fulfilling. At the end of the day, I'm glad I wasn't so focused on animation that I was still able to explore illustration, comics, painting and sculpture. I led a student club that coordinated Brown and RISD students to work together and make video games every semester! I take the skills I picked up from these things into my animation career all the time.

Also the nice thing about animation jobs in the U.S. is that you don’t actually need to have animated a whole kickass industry-standard short film to be hireable. The pipeline is so compartmentalized and jobs so specialized that bg designers really just need to be good at environmental perspective and linework, and bg painters don’t even need to worry about that they can just be good at color and light. And almost no one at least in the U.S. animation industry actually needs to know how to animate LOL. Am I being reductive? Am I downing a heavy dose of copium for going to the school that I did? Who knows. Midway through my freshman year I was seriously considering transferring to a school with a better animation curriculum but I never completed those applications because I took a class during the winter semester called Science-Fiction Fantasy Illustration and midway between designing shitty aliens and my new best friends falling asleep on me during a 2001 Space Odyssey screening I was like. This isn’t so bad. Anyways, it turned out ok, we all have jobs now. 

All that aside, Providence is a beautiful little city. There’s an arts and alternative culture there that feels completely different from those in places like NYC and LA. Chris Van Allsburg the writer/illustrator of Jumanji and The Polar Express was a RISD illustration alum and he based a lot of the imagery of Santa's Village off of Providence. This drawing I did is literally a view from Benefit st that I would walk from my off-campus housing to campus everyday:

There’s a lot of stuff that goes into whether a school, or any school, is the right fit for you. Sorry for rambling but I tried to answer this quick because ik college decisions can be time sensitive. Good luck with your decision making!

[topgunreacts]

please share your thoughts on canon ice with the peanut gallery. character analysis i beg of you. this funky little guy has been shaking in my parlor like a sopping wet chihuahua and i cannot understand him by God. break him down for me. explain him.

what are your thoughts. feelings. complaints, concerns. rude remarks. who is Iceman what’s he about

Omg I'm so bad at these. Please take everything I say with a grain of salt. I will try my best. My real character dissertations are in my stories.

Thots

Tall

Moist

I don't give a shit what color his eyes are; it's running gag of mine (and only funny to me) to switch up his eye color between stories

Stop wearing sunglasses indoors

Great bone structure in the fingers

Fuckable but not by me

Misunderstood

Gum problem

So fucking tired

Incredibly bad at talking about his feelings. So bad. But god he tries his best to make Maverick feel better after Goose goes to the Untitled Game in the sky.

Too smart for his own good

Afraid of emails

Home of sexual

Every time I give him anxiety, I also give him a huge cock as a consolation prize. It's what he deserves.

Could use a good consensual caning. He could learn from Chance Engagement Ice.

Goes to bed at 9 PM

From California or Hawaii or Michigan or Canada or somewhere, a place definitely, with a location that is real

Is NOT a rule follower. Look at his fucking hair. He says YO to Viper. He is unapologetically Doing His Own Thing. Werk.

Concerns

Iceman is regarded as a shallow villain-antagonist by many people. This is very silly. Just because Maverick is The Hero doesn't mean he's right about everything or that what he does is justified. Each and every time Ice calls Maverick out on his behavior, he's (1) correct and (2) motivated by a desire to go home alive at the end of each day. Maverick IS dangerous. He IS unsafe. His behavior SHOULD be regarded with suspicion re: his intentions by his supposed allies. These people are flying around in high-speed metal triangles. Have you ever seen the end result of a mid-air collision between aircraft that AREN'T going mach speeds? Here is an example! [image depicts plane crash debris, no bodies, but...nobody survived this] [TCAS wasn't invented until after the 1956 Grand Canyon collision!!!!!] The DC-7 was the faster jet in the incident, with a max speed of 406 mph (653 km/h, 353 kn). Those little regional jets you might have flown on for short domestic hops can hit speeds of 600 mph in the modern era. A Tomcat, remember, can go supersonic. Ice would become confetti. I'd fucking say something, too!

At no point does Ice come across as cruel when he makes these comments about Maverick's performance, also. He shit talks (cough cough bullshit) but it always struck me as standard issue locker room talk crap. It's not Personal. He's not trying to throw Maverick off his game or anything. Ice isn't there to make FRIENDS he's there to WIN is at TOPGUN ready to do his job and kick ass. And he also, you know, wants to survive to graduation without getting slammed [aerially] by the guy who thinks it's fun to break aviation regulations over an ACTIVE AIRFIELD. People like to compare Ice to Hangman in terms of attitude. A lot. And Ice is not even remotely like Hangman. Asking Maverick whose side he's on after Maverick demonstrates careless piloting--behavior that directly endangers Ice and others--is not the same thing as bringing up somebody's dead dad as like, a dig.

Feelings

Spoonable.

Val Kilmer's little mole is cute.

Complaints

Needs more gay

Needs more lines

Needs more ass shots like the ones Miranda got in Mass Effect 2*

Rude Remarks

Take off your fucking shades in tha club, you absolute square.

*(Did you know the person who made the ME2 mod to remove Miranda's ass shots made a mod for the legendary edition to re-add the ass shots? The studio took out the ass shots on their own for legendary. To be modern and corporate-approved feminist or something. And this modder was like no. Only I can do that. They took Miranda's ass out of this world and they're going to put it back in.)

Conclusion

pussy shot.

[mdhwrites]

I don't know if you've watched Gravity Falls or been deep in the fandom but I just realized how similar Luz and Mabel kinda are. They're both young quirky girls whose selfish actions helped the main villain achieve their goal (supposedly, in Luz's case) and learn the lesson of facing reality instead of being stuck in a fantasy world where they get everything they want (although Luz doesn't really learn this even though it was kinda set-up for her in s1) (they also have a girl rival with shit parents that the fandom ships them with but anyway-)

I'm not saying this to shit on Luz though, I like Luz. But it mind boggles me how Mabel gets shitted on way more than her does despite being younger, actually learning her lesson, and apologizing for it. It might because they're different shows but I know a lot of TOH fans were/are GF fans because of the creators' relationship so the fandoms aren't that different from one another. It MIGHT be because Mabel trusted Blendin so easily despite the situation being shady as hell (while Luz just thought Philip was a normal human in the demon realm) but to be fair, Mabel was cornered in a moment of vulnerability and she literally didn't even know what she was giving him. Abandoning her friends and family for her own fantasy land while an apocalypse going on was really horrible, I won't deny that, but Luz also pretty much did the same when she chose the demon realm (place she doesn't know anything about with STRANGERS) over her own world in the first episode. Sure there wasn't anything horrific going on in the human realm so her ignorance of it wasn't as bad as Mabel's– BUT THEN in TTT she thinks of leaving everyone behind by staying in the human realm while the Collector was doing who knows what???

I don't know, this might be kinda petty, I haven't rewatched GF in ages, but I just think it's unfair Mabel gets more hate than Luz. I feel she's had more character progression compared to the latter and at least she always got called out when she did something wrong and learned from it.

So take all of this with a grain of salt because while I've heard a little of this discourse, I haven't watched a lot of Gravity Falls (recently tried again and found myself not loving the first episode if I'm honest) and have never been a part of its fandom. However, this is a chance to talk about why Luz is so liked and 'relatable' to so many because it is not hard to figure out why people like Luz. Why? Well... A lot of it comes down to framing and how the two shows see the two girls.

Gravity Falls sees Mabel as a tweenage girl.

The Owl House sees Luz as the embodiment of what a teenage nerd wishes they were/could be.

Those are VERY different goals and framing.

One, Mabel, is going to be INCREDIBLY fallible. Neither her or Dipper are anywhere close to perfect people because... Well, they're teenagers. They get way too into certain things. They're awkward when it comes to those obsessions. They're awkward about how to deal with change, consequences, etc. like that because that's just the age they are. They're figuring out the world and are going to run face first into it and that will be awkward, clumsy and often destructive without any sort of excuse besides they didn't think the consequences through. That's kids for you.

The other is... More idealistic. Luz doesn't face real consequences for testing her boundaries and is always bailed out. When she fucks up, she always does it with the best intentions and/or no one actually gets hurt. People coddle her and always make concessions to her desires with minimal push back and always end up on her side unless they're just a REALLY big meanie head. She always makes peoples' lives better, she never gets real criticism or ridicule for her interests and is always accepted by the right people for those interests. Always given more and more for being her quirky self!

A lot of this for Luz is because she's an audience surrogate and TOH wants the audience to feel good about themselves. It knows that a lot of nerds will be the ones watching it and leans in. This is actually contrasted by the fact that, well, Mabel isn't the audience surrogate or the absolute primary character of Gravity Falls. Her role is more complicated versus Dipper who IS the nerdy one who's closer to being the audience surrogate.

Just to really drive this home: People on my Discord have talked about this and one of the biggest 'crimes' as seen by a lot of the fandom is that Mabel causes Dipper to lose out on his dream of researching with Ford and staying in Gravity Falls. I could even see some arguments of things like "He's planning a future!" or "He's making the world better!"

But... Let's shift the framing for a moment from "Mabel caused Dipper to give up on his dream" to "Mabel made sure Dipper chose reality over fantasy." After all, his desire was to throw away his friends, his family, EVERYTHING to just continue hanging out with this one old dude and studying the weird phenomenon of the world, an inherently isolating job. He gets to go on this big adventure and follow his intellectual drive... At the cost of reality and everything he has known.

So why don't people get upset at Dipper for trying to do this? Well, there's a lot of potential reasons that I can't really narrow down without watching the show. It may have just been framed as a positive while Mabel's is framed as negative. It could be that while Mabel's is just a generic, girly fantasy that not much of the core audience actually wants, Dipper's is the cool, smart fantasy that is totally not just a fantasy, but a CAREER. Or it could go back to the root problem: Because Dipper is closer to the audience surrogate, closer to the main character, there is a bias to inherently see his actions as good. We could literally watch two characters do the same thing and we will root for the main character simply because that is who we are trained to root for.

A great example of this from TOH is how Luz is allowed to get mad at people for lying to her but not the other way around. She literally attacks Eda and gets the two captured in Titan, Where Art Thou? because Eda lied to her and she is supposed to feel justified in this anger to make the tragedy angle work. Meanwhile, there is ONE time when anyone gets mad at Luz for lying and honestly, the framing and reactions cause it to end up feeling much more like it was just for a prettier scene change during Reaching Out. After all, Amity still wants to fix Luz's pain before Luz even apologizes for breaking her word by lying. So why doesn't anyone call out the hypocrisy here? Why is NO ONE allowed to get upset with Luz about this?

Because she's the main character. Because we are trained to root for her and, well, Luz also is the one we are told to want to be. She is the every nerd. She is meant to connect to a very wide net of outcasts who feel like they don't belong and wish things were different. Wishes people weren't mean to them or didn't get mad at them when they made mistakes. That just let them be the hero of their own story.

So of course, they don't want Luz to be yelled at, even when that is the actually human and reasonable thing for someone to do. They don't want to question what she does so when the show gives them an excuse, or they have to go to reality if the show itself doesn't give an excuse (This is why people emphasize Luz's age and nuerodivergence to excuse her while bluntly ignoring Mabel's age when it comes to her actions), so that they don't have to recognize that Luz does some REALLY shitty things, especially in the back half of the show. It is simply more convenient for the narrative they want out of the show for Luz to be this way.

And that is okay from a casual standpoint. A lot of fiction is escapist. There's nothing wrong with wanting to jump into a world where you're never actually wrong and never in trouble. Where your angst is always met with hugs and understanding rather than actual human emotion. That's how media works. Most mass appeal products are escapist. It's part of why the Isekai genre is SO prevalent right now because it is one of the purest forms of escapist fiction out there, especially due to modern isekai tropes.

But if you're going to talk critically about something, escapism is very rarely a good jumping off point for it. It will make you ignore a LOT about the work because it's uncomfortable for you to ask questions about it. I'm not talking about "Why does this world have magic" sort of things mind you. I'm talking about, say, "Why does this character get so many power ups, so easily, and with little effort in earning them?" When you want escapism, the pacing won't bother you. If you're actually looking at themes and payoffs, it will bother you a LOT. And yes, this does tie into TOH because if you want to be Luz, getting the glyphs feels great! If you actually interrogate the story, you go "Wait, they hadn't actually done like... ANYTHING with her not having magic in a magical world and she already gets a spell? And two of these spells she does literally nothing for. Arguably three since she is put into timeout as a punishment and gets the glyph I guess for being a bad person." That TOTALLY is good storytelling and makes sense with positive themes and proper explorations of its own ideas.

*sigh*

It's a rough push and pull and it can make it so people, even if they like the show, who disagree with the popular opinion, the one that usually lifts up the audience flattering elements the most, are just in a rough position where they hear the same opinions over and over again. All while knowing that if they speak up, they'll be stomped on.

Just like Mabel was while Dipper was raised into the spotlight. At least by the fandom.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[anderscim]

✦ language, sentence structure and footnote #5 in the new DRDT MV

//spoilers for the new “Literature Girl Insane” music video posted by DRDT

//also spoilers for DRDT up to chapter 2 part 1

i think i’m pretty clever for using this frame, am i right? (-∀-)

alright, here is my 2k+ word rant regarding some things i noticed with the word order and translations in the new video—as well as its connections with some of the footnotes.

(take all of this with a grain of salt)

i noticed recently that the DRDT dev pays very, very close attention to lyrics and lyrical structure in japanese—and that is seen in the way they order certain words.

let’s take this screen, for example:

i’m not sure if you all noticed, but in this part, the lyrics show up in a very specific order.

instead of each word appearing in an order similar to how you would read it in english (“look, aside from that, give me the usual medicine”), they do this:

look -> aside -> from that ->the -> usual -> medicine -> give me

and surprisingly, this isn’t random. the words appear in an order that aligns with the sentence structure for the japanese lyrics.

in japanese, the lyrics are as follows:

「ほら、/ それより / いつもの / 薬 / を出して」

if you translate these separately, “medicine” (薬) comes before “give me” (出して, in this context), “the usual” (いつもの) comes before that—and so on and so forth. interestingly enough, the dev subtly threw that detail in the video, instead of just going by the alignment of the english translation.

and, if you didn’t know, in many cases (more often than not), japanese sentence structure wildly differs from english sentence structure—which is exactly what makes it so hard to translate. (;- -)

this also happens in other spots, by the way! here’s another example:

“even if you have a heart full of ambition” appears in reverse order here—but that’s also because of japanese sentence structure.

“向上/の/心/だって/持ったって” -> “ambition/of/heart/even/if you have” this is a rough translation by the way sorry (_ _;)

i can come up with more examples if needed, so let me know (*´ω`*)

however, this isn’t the only way that the dev is being attentive to specific details in japanese. they also seemed to be aware of some literary references that were legitimately within the lyrics, and put their own spin onto it.

for example, this:

at first, the (turbatus) may seem out of place, but trust me, it isn’t. the original japanese lyrics also reference “ego cognito ergo sum” (i think, therefore i am), but put their own spin onto it—the dev somehow managed to translate the lyrics in a way that kept the same modification.

the japanese equivalent to “ego cognito ergo sum” is as follows:

“我思う故に我あり”

however, the japanese lyrics for bungaku shoujo insane put a small modification to the very end:

“我思う故に悩み”

悩み (nayami) is to be worried/troubled/etc.²¹

but basically, the dev also managed to keep that same modification by adding “turbatus” (which translates to “disturbed, disoriented, upset”) to their rendition of the lyrics. though this is me speaking from personal experience, 悩み usually has a different (more lighthearted and flexible) connotation compared to something as heavy as turbatus—so i wonder if this specific word choice might be telling us a lot more.

…okay that was a huge tangent. moving on. what i basically wanted to say is, well… the DRDT team is very attentive and pays very close attention to minor details in japanese, and a lot of it is actually successfully conveyed in their video. however, this pretty much indicates that anything they “botch” in the translation is intentional.⁵ (i’ll get to that later.)

buuuut before we get to that, how ‘bout i switch topics to something else: there is one specific part that they weren’t able to manipulate the translation, even if they wanted to.

i think you know which few frames i’m referring to.

(the other two have the same issue as well, but these first two are easier to explain.)

the thing is, the reason why there’s no translation here is that there’s no way to translate these lyrics without messing up the original japanese sentence structure.

let me break it down. “革命家” (kakumeika) is the japanese translation for a revolutionary. Xander, as the ultimate rebel, is the perfect image for this. “気取り” (kidori) is used in this context to mean that they’re “pretending to be / having the air of” a revolutionary, rather than actually being one.

“馬鹿” (baka) is “idiot,” “鉛” (namari) is lead (as in the metal), “切符” (kippu) is “ticket,” and “与える” (ataeru) in this context is “to give” (but more in a “feeding something to a pet” context than an actual “gifting something to a person” context). “与えよう” (ataeyou) is just a different tense, as in “let’s give,” and so on and so forth.

however, if you were to translate these two lines into english, this is what you would get (rough translation):

“let’s give the idiots pretending to be revolutionaries tickets of lead.”

my brain is fried so i can’t go too far into details right now, but essentially, the translation completely switches around the sentence structure and jumbles the order of the words. if the dev wanted to specifically distribute the lyrics to those two frames in a way that fit those specific images, they would have to warp existing grammar rules and write something that’s… well, obscure. my horrible attempt at a literal translation with the same structure: “assuming the air of revolutionaries / these idiots, tickets of lead should be given to them.” however, this would be too obscure and it gives this lyric a largely different tone (_ _;) especially since david probably doesn’t want to call xander an idiot (/hj) the lyrics would have been extremely difficult to rewrite while getting a similar message across, it was actually more fitting to instead keep the original japanese lyrics and fit them to the two frames in a way that best mirrors each character. …by the way, this is part of the reason why i was (jokingly) suspecting whether or not the dev was actually japanese. some of their attention to wording, sentence structure… even if they’re not japanese, they’re insanely dedicated. massive kudos to them. o(≧▽≦)o okay this has been plaguing my mind for a little bit, side note and small tangent: Xander (at least, i think it’s him. based on the glove) is holding his assigned weapon, a gun, in the first frame here. however, as we know—Xander’s gun is actually nonfunctional, and does not work. the fact that he’s holding it and having his finger on the trigger, despite it being unable to fire, could actually reference the “air of a revolutionary” in the original lyrics, as he may pretend to be someone that can use action to make change in the world but actually can’t. however, that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s true. this video is from david’s perspective, so this may actually be more of a reflection of david’s philosophy regarding how the world can’t change, rather than xander himself. this would match the “unreliable narrator” angle i’m seeing in this video—which i’ll get to later. i also unfortunately do not have a clear answer regarding who the person with the envelope is, but my bets are on it being a teacher of some sorts, or one of the adults that formally invited the students (including xander, david, and the rest of the students) to hope’s peak in the united states. after all, they’re handing out a “ticket of lead,” as seen in the lyrics. lead can cause poisoning to the body, and is known to accumulate over time. by even joining this school in the first place, the drdt cast is unknowingly signing themselves up for something that will traumatize them / corrupt their minds for the coming years. and i don’t know if this is just me, but some aspects of the embossing stamp of the envelope (including the justice scales, the shield(?)-esque pattern, the wings), seem very suspiciously similar to a logo for a school like that. i’m done with the tangent for now ( ´ ▽ ` )

what’s incredibly interesting (and ironic) about this frame, however, is the footnote. out of all places to put it, the dev placed footnote #5 in the one place where there isn’t a translation.

for those of you that aren’t aware, by the way, this is footnote #5:

As the translation has been intentionally botched in many parts, it should not be considered accurate.

and, actually—this is true. not necessarily botched, though, just maybe slightly manipulated.

here’s a couple of examples:

switching out pronouns in some of the lyrics (changing “i” to “you,” for example). most clearly seen here:

original lyrics: “今僕は何故泣くの？ / 今僕は何故暴れ出すの？” most of the lyrics are the same, except for one thing: “僕” (boku) is used when one wants to refer to themselves. (in other terms, it should be: “right now, why do i cry? / right now, why do i go insane?”). however, the lyrics use “you” instead. side note: this “botch,” and the roman numerals combined—david spinning the narrative so he’s directing those questions towards others, and not towards himself as a form of deflection? the unreliable narrator theory becomes stronger and stronger （＾ν＾） /j

another example is here:

original: “満足したなら / 消えて行け！” -> “if you are [now] satisfied / go and disappear!”

again, another pronoun switch, but this time it’s flipped—while the original lyrics are directing this at someone else, david (or whoever “???” is) is talking about himself. it almost seems like a response to the original lyrics. either way, this is one thing to think about. there are other examples, and i might bring them up later—but for now, these are the main ones i can think of.

2. verb tenses! specifically, these two frames:

the original lyrics: “大事なものなら / 壊れて消えたよ” this is also pretty similar, except using the ending “た” (ta) at the end of a verb, instead of “る” (lu/ru), puts the verb into past tense. (this is from personal experience, however. take it with a grain of salt)

so in reality, the lyrics are: ”if something was important, / it already broke and disappeared”

which is… interesting. because it actually does imply some things regarding david’s philosophies. given that this was likely intentional, this may be an indication of david manipulating his own thought process—from regretting what he lost in the past, to spinning that into “it was going to be lost anyways, regardless of what happened” (after all, for him, “if something is important, it will break away and disappear”). basically, it loops him into an almost pessimistic way of coping. from his perspective, if something is important to him, it will be lost, no matter what—which is hopeless, yes, but it prevents him from forming any other relationships that are “important” and/or getting emotionally attached to them in the expectation that they’ll get burned away eventually.

3. i don’t even know what to call this… like, re-contextualization? specifically, here:

the original lyrics:

“そうして忘れてゆくのでしょう / はい”

however, despite keeping the same literal meanings, this translation completely reconstructs the context of the lyrics. “はい” in this situation is actually used as an interjection, as in “yeah, / okay,” rather than a direct “yes” or an answer to a question.

additionally, “そうして忘れてゆくのでしょう” isn’t exactly a question—more so, it’s more of a “but then you’ll forget anyways” sort of… i guess “throwaway phrase.” my brain is dead, so sorry if this is a bit unclear. the true translation would be closer to “but then, i bet, you’ll forget about it.”

either way, just one thing is clear: the original lyrics were made with no intention at all to be read as a conversation, yet the translation was intentionally spun in a way to fit that. this “botch” also seems to be very important, especially with the fact that it’s labeled with the 19th footnote—as for why, however, i’m not too sure. it could be an indication that david has the idea that people will forget what has happened (and never try to change it the next time around) so ingrained into his head that it affects the way he hears conversations, events, and certain interactions—or it could be that he’s just an unreliable narrator and this is his way of proving his philosophy even in the most minor of word choices, or both, or neither. to be honest, i don’t know what the exact purpose is. (￣ー￣ )

there’s probably other “botched translations,” but those are all i have for now. but yeah, the fact that outside of these “slips” the dev was very attentive about the translation and sentence structure is what gives clear confirmation that these mistakes are absolutely intentional. they’re likely there to provide some insight into not just david’s character and philosophies, but also about his coping mechanisms and how he spins his own narrative to prove his worldview right.

as for why the corresponding footnote is placed at the one place there isn’t a proper translation in the mv… well…

(/hj) i’ll figure it out soon. (( _ _ ))

either way, feel free to reblog or send in an ask if there’s anything you want to say regarding my noticings (whether that’s refuting them or adding evidence)!

and as always, take this with a grain of salt

[itsbeenliketenyearsitsprettywild]

What if... Kazui’s victim WASN’T his wife?

So, I just connected some dots about Kazui’s videos and various points of symbolism in it, and If I’m right.. Kazui might’ve been pulling the wool over our eyes way further than we thought, guys. That is to say: What if his wife’s death was in reaction to his original murder?

(rest under readmore!)

Part 1: Kazui, René Magritte, and the Art of Misdirection

One of the things Cat made sure to make clear to the audience was that we have to take everything Kazui gives us with a major grain of salt. This is shown multiple ways; the illusionist persona he takes on for most of the video, the fast-paced sequences meant to obscure important details, the fact that it involves multiple René Magritte references, etc.

Though, speaking of René Magritte... anyone remember another of his famous works?

That’s right: Kazui’s mind might be feeding us a narrative more deceptive and treacherous than we think. And this will all unfortunately be ignoring the fact that ‘une pipe’ is French slang for ‘a blowjob’.  don’t blame me, blame Kazui’s subconscious

Just to be clear: I still think the visuals Kazui gives us and the clues he sets up for us are very important to consider. It’s just that the obvious picture they paint isn’t entirely accurate.

After all, while he may be one of the prisoners that the narrative has been clear about being an intentional liar/deceiver, the way his mind portrays these deceptions is very different from how MILGRAM’s other liar, Shidou, goes out of his way to deceive us:

Shidou’s method of deception is more obvious while at the same time being more obtuse: he makes copious use of visual symbolism and metaphor. The building blocks he uses are, by their nature revealing to us his subjective feelings and personal truth with regards to a subject, while the objective reality of what happened takes a back seat. In doing so, he’s still honestly revealing that everything we’re seeing at a given moment is important. It’s just that, what anything we’re being shown is actually supposed to convey, that’s for us to work out.

In comparison, the way Kazui sets up his lies?  Well, like any true illusionist, it’s all in the presentation and setup.

Part 2: The Man(’s Wife) Behind the Curtain

So, given that Prisoner 007’s main tactic for lying to us is misdirection, this means one big foundational aspect of truth is immediately doubtful: Anything Kazui directly tries to tell/convey to us is immediately questionable and likely not entirely accurate.

You see, one of the best ways a stage magician can misdirect an audience is through an misleading framing of events. They do this multiple ways - by stating what kind of trick they’re going to be pulling, letting the audience see what props they’re holding as the trick begins, and noting where the conceit of the trick isn’t (ie; the classic  “Nothing up my sleeve!” line).

In doing so, the audience is primed to see everything they notice from a particular perspective. That way, even if they DO glance at the trick the magician is pulling, they’ll still be unlikely to understand exactly what they’re seeing and have ‘the magic ruined’ for them.

So, any big conceits and large framing devices Kazui draws our attention to probably aren’t being utilized the way they seem to be at face value. If we want to the truth, it’s gonna be in the slower moments where Kazui isn’t talking to us. Or, in the moments that he is, the most important parts are the little things that go by too fast for up to keep up with.

As an example, look back up at the most recent screenshot I posted. Notice anything that’s a bit harder to immediately parse compared to everything else?

Yep, that little French blurb tucked between all this bigger, flashier stuff. Just based on the captions, it’s easy to pin them as the lyrics translated to French, right?

Wrong. 

While the lyrics and visuals seem to be painting a picture of Kazui eventually coming into conflict with his innocent wife, the second line in French... could almost be taken as a... statement of solidarity? It’s written in past tense (as compared to ‘we will be better’), but is still much more equal and affectionate on both sides than the simple ‘victim-criminal’ dynamic would lead one to infer.

Not to mention... wasn’t it implied they talked about all this and largely resolved it back in half?

And indeed, it was! Starting from 2:18 going to 2:36, we get the green apple (which seems to represent Kazui’s hidden nature) sitting on a table onstage with the spotlight shining directly on it. The truth about Kazui has been put front and center where it can readily be seen. And what do we see as we pull into the foreground?

Not a fight, or a clash, but Hinako reaching out and comforting Kazui.

For all he’s told us that confessing the truth is what lead to ‘her’ death, the actual (notably subdued and understated) moment we see where it seems like he’s finally admitted what he’s been hiding his entire life, she responds to his truth with a very small smile.

A hand on his cheek. More than anything else, it’s this moment that resonates with that ‘we would do better’ that Kazui tried to slide past our radar.

But if that’s the case, it raises a very important question: If it wasn’t actually the truth itself that caused everything come crashing down, what did? If this was still everything being fine... 

Then, what moment was represented by all of this?

What, exactly, was this ‘dove’ Kazui tore apart with his teeth that drove his wife to react with horror and despair?

Part 3: Green, the color of hidden truths

For all that Kazui’s intentional deception of the viewer is near exclusively done through misdirecting the audience’s attention or misleading our perspective, there’s still a lot he’s only willing to tell us through symbolism. The most obvious case of this, of course, is Kazui’s green apple, reflecting his true nature he’s hidden away for most of his life.

But did you notice the color coding he also uses throughout most of Cat?

On the most basic level, we can see this utilized as a way to differentiate relevance to characters: Kazui represents himself with blue, and Hinako with pink.

See? 

As such, the colors Kazui uses in backgrounds, in drawing characters, and to write out text can be very important in deciphering what everything is supposed to mean. The problem is that he uses a lot more colors besides just pink and blue, with us currently not knowing what any of the other colors mean.

...Well, besides green, at least. He’s already made it pretty obvious that green represents hidden things that Kazui (on some level) doesn’t want discovered.

...But, wait. 

If so....

...Why is this one woman in the wedding audience wearing a green dress?

Most of y’all probably already know this, but I recently made a post where I drew the conclusion that she’s actually the wife of Kazui’s childhood friend, the bartender, with the bar scene in half being their introductory meeting so they could get to know each other better.

One of the things I didn’t bring up in that post was the fact that we seem to watch her get absolutely sloshed during it.

Which. Certainly is a choice? Going out all dressed up to where your hubby works, to meet the guy he’s been best friends with since childhood, and you decide the best way to make a first impression is to get hammered and start having to lean against this relative stranger just so you don’t fall off the stool? 

Don’t worry, my theory isn’t going the roofie route, so no need to fret over that.

Instead, the question I started considering was, “Why would she feel the need to start drinking so much?” And, in general, there’s a few different reasons why someone might decide to get seriously inebriated; to blow off steam, to forget your problems, to fuel a budding alcohol addiction, etc. 

But the reason that made the most sense to me in this context was drinking to settle the nerves. 

Sometimes, when people feel tense or awkward when socializing, they’ll start drinking alcohol as a way to calm themselves down and make things less tense. Booze is a well-known social lubricant, after all; knock enough back and suddenly you’re everybody’s friend! 

But, to feel the need to go that far just to keep up a conversation with the guy your husband is closest to... She must have felt REALLY uncomfortable, for some reason.

Which brings me back to her wearing the color of intentionally hidden secrets at Kazui’s wedding.

I think she had a feeling about Kazui’s true nature from when they first met. While the thought of it made her uncomfortable, largely as to what might mean for Kazui’s dynamic with her husband. However, she didn’t want to come out and confront him about it in such a public place (and where her spouse works, no less!), so instead she just kept drinking. The wedding... to be honest, I think the wedding reassured and assuaged her doubts for at least a little while. 

After all, he and Hinako seemed to be seriously happy and in love! It wouldn’t feel anywhere near as sincere if the groom was secretly ‘like that’, right?

And at some point during that time (don’t remember if we’ve been given an official marriage length for them or not; please let me know if we have) Kazui confessed the truth to Hinako, who largely just took it in stride and stayed by his side through thick and thin. 

‘It’ only occurred after all that had already happened.

What’s ‘it’, you ask?

Well... the truth is, I have no way of knowing precisely what ‘it’ was; it’s the biggest truth Kazui is hiding from us, after all, and a magician would never reveal his secrets so easily. What I do know is that it likely involved the bartender’s wife directly confronting Kazui, with Kazui doing something drastic in return, likely to better keep his secret hidden.

And, for all I can’t tell you precisely what ‘it’ was, whether ‘it’ was threatening someone or the actual murder Kazui was put in Milgram for, I CAN readily point you to how Kazui viewed ‘it’:

And it was only after discovering whatever the above represents that we see Hinako react like this: 

But, with all this in mind, I think Hinako’s potential... murder? suicide? whatever it was? ... is far less about whatever ‘green apple’ Kazui was hiding, and far more about how far he was willing to go to keep it hidden. 

TL;DR: In keeping audience misdirection in mind, Hinako finding out about Kazui’s true nature more than likely isn’t what lead to the ‘murder’ Kazui is in Milgram for. If anything, it was likely the wife of his childhood friend confronting Kazui about his secret that lead to where things ended up; from what we can tell, Kazui had already told his wife his secret, and that hadn’t pushed her away.

[compacflt]

Home. February 2009.

Mitchell’s got the radio on in the garage—quiet, but still loud enough that he doesn’t hear Kazansky come through the door. He’s working on one of his bikes, crouched low, parts and tools scattered on the concrete around him—but, in typical Maverick fashion, with a method to the madness. Kazansky leans up against the doorjamb and watches him work for a few moments—his intense laser-like focus, even as he’s tapping the toe of a cowboy boot to Duran Duran’s “Rio;” the steadiness of his hands; the way the gears turn so obviously in his head…watching Mitchell think is sometimes as entertaining as a football game. Around others, he makes a point of annoyingly remarking on every little thing; but when he’s by himself, he’s quiet, systematic, methodical. When one piece doesn’t fit, he sets it down and tries the next. The two of them really are more alike than they are different, when it comes down to it.

It takes a few more minutes, but Mitchell finally looks back for something, and catches Kazansky watching him. “Jeez,” he says with a facetious sigh of relief, “you scared me!”

“Your ass is hanging out of those blue jeans, Captain.”

“Oh, yeah?” says Mitchell, standing to hoist them back up. “And how long have you been standing there admiring the view?”

“Either a few seconds or a few hours, depending on who’s asking.” He comes closer. “Whatcha doing?”

Mitchell leans back against his workbench and taps his little crescent wrench against his grease-stained palm. “It’s kinda boring. Just fixing shit. It was long overdue.”

Kazansky shrugs. “Show me. I got time.”

“Well,” says Mitchell, crouching again and gesturing to the gaping-open wheelwell of his bike— “This old girl’s got trouble with her gear shifts. It’s a known issue with Kawasakis. Once you disengage the clutch, sometimes the flywheel slips between fourth and fifth gear and you get stuck there without moving up. Normally it’s not a big deal, I just pull the clutch and slow down a little and then gun it back into gear, but it’s been pissing me off for a decade, so I figured I’d just fix it myself. Ordered a smooth-shifter kit a few weeks back. Now I’m just trying to get it onto the P.V.C. module. So that’s what I’m doing.”

“Uh-huh,” says Kazansky, and that’s when he notices that he hasn’t looked at the bike once. Sometimes he gets a kick out of just watching Mitchell talk. “You’re the only one of us with an actual mechanic's license, so take my advice with a grain of salt, but I think the process would go a lot smoother if you actually bothered to read the instruction manual…”

“I have an A. and P. license to work on planes,” Mitchell specifies, “and just our plane in particular.” Then he tosses his head with a smile. “Sure, it might go smoother with instructions. But where’s the fun in that?”

It’s one of those slow little moments where Kazansky isn’t thinking—and, more importantly, when he doesn’t want to think. He rests his hand on Mitchell’s hip, tugs him gently forward, leans down, and kisses him—a little chastely, but only a little—and then can’t control himself away from smiling against Mitchell’s mouth. Keeps his eyes closed. “I just came out here to tell you—I’m hungry, and I was gonna go get food, and to ask you if you wanted anything in particular.”

Mitchell still has a hand on the nape of Kazansky’s neck, a thumb on the shell of his ear. “Let’s do Mexican,” he decides after a second.

“Again? We just had Mexican on Tuesday.”

“I’m a hardworking boy,” he counters, “and I deserve a burrito.”

“Fine,” says Kazansky, already stepping away and fishing out his keys. “I’ll just go downtown. Don’t go anywhere. I’ll be back in forty-five.”

“Oh, you know me, Ice,” says Mitchell, turning back to his precious bike. “I never go anywhere.”

He’s already come back to a laser-focus, his smile dropping; he crouches again and gets back to work, and he really is something of a genius, because he’s putting together this puzzle without even looking at the picture on the box, and so intently focused that he never even notices Kazansky standing in the doorway, watching him work for another three-and-a-half minutes straight.

Many, many years later, Tom will tell Pete he loves him—as he so often will, in those days; it will eventually come to him as easily as breathing—but for once Pete will stop and jokingly reply, “Why? —No, go on, give me a list. Why?”

And that’s such a complicated question Tom won’t know how to respond for a few seconds.

But then he’ll think of moments like this one, moments that at the time had seemed insignificant and forgettable—if not forgettable, then like they should be forgotten—but were of course impossibly important in hindsight. Tom will think of all these little moments, all these little ways they said they loved each other without ever needing to actually say it—and it’ll make him want to cry.

But he won’t, because in the grand scheme of things, moments like this one were always the furthest thing from sad.

He’ll still need to answer Pete’s question. “Well,” he will say slowly, “you might think this is a ridiculous answer, but…you know how you never use instructions when you’re building something…?” —and that’s how the very long list will begin.

[athousandbyeol]

discussion #8 (only friends): topmew are fighting a losing battle from the beginning [episode 1 recap]

there are so many things to unravel and i don't even know where to begin. i was quite overwhelmed and underwhelmed during the premiere of only friends. i couldn't fathom everything that was happening as episode 1 was A LOT, but i'll try my best to gather everything that i see from these two episodes in two different posts (and will try to be as coherent and concise as possible).

as always, my discussion posts are always welcomed to incite more discourses everywhere. i hope it can provide a bit of clarity to the thoughts or questions everyone has especially about topmew.

please take this with a grain of salt :)

let's begin.

episode 1: the game begins

topmew's first encounter; the baseline of top's interest in mew

so, it turns out, top and mew met way before boston introduced them to each other! that was a very pleasant surprise. and also very essential to the 'possible' topmew love arc.

i believe, during their first encounter, top was possibly annoyed by this guy (mew) who happened to bump into him and spill the drink all over his shirt. but as mew poorly attempted to fix the mess, top was more interested in mew's white wristband.

this is when things get interesting. white wristband means celibacy; mew isn't interested to be 'hit on'. but top outwardly said, "you're wearing a white wristband. i guess i can hit on you." at this point, top is really colour blind

but what top said there showed his egoistic/self-centred nature. i guess when top said this to other people, they might immediately agree to 'get laid' by the top tier. but clearly, mew (and ray) wasn't succumbing to top's ego. and this somehow challenged his pride even more. their first encounter was a moment of sparked interest in top— he wanted mew more than ever. who is this guy? why is he so hard to impress?

topmew's second encounter; they kicked off (together)

as they met again the second time, the spark was mutual. mew was interested this time, probably because he saw top's persistence as a 'challenge' that he wanted to take on. he was flattered, yes, when top said he was cute, but he also knew he couldn't let those words cloud his judgement because, at the end of the day, top was still a stranger with a name.

these stealing glances; both of them were checking each other out, kind of like a player looking at their opponent, trying to study their enemy's face/appearance so it would be easier for them to strategise and take aim for the upcoming battle. but it was also a moment of blooming intimacy between them. the distance was nonexistent and it was clearly intentional from top's behalf. he just wanted to be there, present and close and reachable to mew. top wanted to make himself bigger than anyone else in the room. it was his way of saying just look at me and no one else. and oh, did mew look at him all right.

the push and pull game continued as top complimented mew, saying he was cute with the glasses. i don't know if it's intentional how frequently the 'i can read people well' and 'i know what people are thinking' is repeated in episode 1. i guess it's a foreshadowing that 1) mew's judgement of top will be entirely wrong (perhaps mew has always seen top as someone who's a bit suspicious but kind. but that will change once he knows top and boston are fucking behind his back while top 'deemed' to pursue mew as his boyfriend) or 2) mew has been right all along (he knows top was playing with him from the get-go so he tricked top into his 'game' and played him too). i think it'll be a mixture of these two (and possibly more) because mew is proven to be VERY cunning, deceiving and manipulative too.

i have to say, i think top does like mew, but not romantically (not yet). in episode 1, i think top just likes the idea of winning mew over. i believe it's fairly easy for top to get whatever he wants, given that look and status of his. however, he has never met someone like mew who didn't see those things as charming or a good enough reason to have a steamy hook-up for the night. and this tallies with what mew said in episode 2, "you aren't entirely my type."

at this point, top just wanted to prove to boston that he could have his way with mew. mew wouldn't be so difficult to lure because look at him? doesn't he look gullible? i think these are top's initial thoughts as he observed mew from afar. he truly believed that mew would eventually give in if top played his cards well. (but mew isn't as easy as top and boston think he is.)

so that's when top used one of his tricks, "i have a headache. sorry because i have to crash at your house for a while." this is clearly top 1) putting mew at ease by coming over to mew's house (mew's territory), just to make mew comfortable of doing 'it' at his own space (again, an act of manipulation that read gentleman-ly, but not really), and 2) giving mew the idea that mew is in control and he can stop if he doesn't want to (which to an extent was valid, but top was hoping they won't stop because he wanted to do mew there and then and there was no way top would leave this house without having a taste of mew).

topmew's first kiss; a silent demand of agreement

as i've mentioned, top only wanted to have sex with mew and that was it. he didn't have other intentions to be in mew's house other than getting in mew's pants and giving him a 'good' time.

from the way top behaved around mew, it was like a hunter studying his prey. again, in this hunter-prey/hunter-hunter relationship, of course, one will have the upper hand over the other. but it's different when it comes to topmew. it's because, in actuality, both of them are hunters. yet, top and mew delude themselves into believing mew is top's prey and top is mew's prey. thus, this is one of the reasons why i equate their relationship as fighting a losing battle. if both of them are hunters, is it possible to benefit anything from each other aside from gaining new skills? i don't think so. this isn't a beneficial relationship. both of them will end up hurting each other the most to determine who's the better hunter.

however, as top and mew were kissing, it was mainly controlled by top. as this was in top's element, he had all the benefits. and he believed, with his good kissing 'skills', it would be enough to bend mew in his direction and give in.

at one point, mew was about to admit defeat.

here, i think mew was a bit dazed. none of his past lovers (?) were this bold and top took him by surprise. it was also evident when top first kissed him. it took about 2 to 3 seconds for mew to respond as he finally could register whatever was going on right now.

there was hesitation, but as mew was also equally intrigued by top, this wasn't as bad as he thought it would be.

drawing boundaries; another challenge for top to partake

the sexy times ended as quickly as they began. mew wasn't ready to do it with top. i'm glad they retained this part. it provides so much depth to mew's character. also, it makes sense because their first time will be very special for mew as it'll confirm his feelings for top, and it'll also be one of his tools to 'guilt-trip' top into thinking, "you've destroyed my trust in our relationship," aka the confrontation scene.

i think it's very valid how mew wants his first time to be with someone he knows— likes. he doesn't want to do it with a stranger, even though that stranger is very handsome and charming like top. and it's also funny to me that top insisted—

—they can do it even without knowing each other.

this already sets top and mew apart; top doing this so casually with anyone as long as he 'comes', for the sake of his pleasure and to set his mind off of his problems, and mew wants to do this only with people he knows/likes because it's what he believes is appropriate/true. it shows how different their understanding of sex is, and possibly how love works. what top said here also amplifies his need and frustration to have things going on as he planned. he didn't want mew to ruin it even though this involved mew. he just wanted to taste mew— why is it so difficult?

and this line knocked me off GOOD because it's going to be so pertinent as the series progresses.

side note: i have a tiny feeling that mew will end up being like boston at one point in this drama to get on top's nerves. it might be one of his ways to play top at his own game; sleeping around with no strings attached, with no names acquired, with no feelings tied. top uses sex as a relief and confidence booster, so mew will also use sex to break top's heart. and this will tear top apart. i hope it will.

ice cream; a motif of gaining composure and masking anger

i see this ice cream scene for two different reasons.

from mew's perspective, the ice cream acts as a 'cooling effect'. he was definitely 'heated' from the intense make-out session with top before. so the ice cream helped mew regained his composure and set his virtues straight again; no one-night stands in my watch, ever. not even with someone like top. he's levelling his head again so that he won't act on impulse— it's one of mew's ways to gain back the control he has over the game.

as for top, it's very interesting how the camera focused on top's mouth first.

i think it's clear as day: top IS mad. he is beyond pissed. he didn't get what he wanted. and mew had the audacity to offer him ice cream? that's why the camera focused on top's mouth; we didn't get to see his eyes because the eye is the beholder of emotions. if his whole face is shown, it's easy to detect the anger in top's eyes. it's very smart directing in my opinion. i absolutely adore this shot.

then, this scene progressed with mew saying some interesting things. i think it might be another foreshadowing that mew will be the obsessive/possessive type when he likes something/someone. and top keeps on playing this confident and understanding guy in front of mew despite knowing mew might get the gist of his dishonesty. but, again, at this stage, top doesn't really know mew to make that judgement. it's safe to say it's his constant perception of mew; he won't know. he's too nice/gullible to read through my lies. again, it's top thinking he's still in power; but in reality, mew is also controlling him.

when they're sleeping on the bed, mew glanced at top. i think it was an invitation. didn't you say you want to cuddle? why should i go to you? you have to go to me. again, this clearly shows who's more powerful in this relationship; it's mew.

also, i think it's quite baffling how easily top agreed to mew's needs here on the bed. i guess it's because the bed/sleeping is top's weakest point (point proven in episode 2 when it's confirmed top is an insomniac! i freaked out while watching it last night because my assumption came true t_t).

so, being here with mew on the bed, when top has always been battling with those nightmares— of course, he would be at mew's mercy. mew was giving him a lot of things here; comfort, solidity, company, safety and warmth. these attributes helped top to get a good sleep and keep those devils astray. (i believe this is one of the things top //genuinely// likes about mew. mew helps him sleep better. mew helps top with his sleeping problems. mew offers him safety, something he has been battling with for a long time.)

"it all depends on you," mew's way of saying, are you up for the challenge?

previously, i thought only ray would be the volatile/unstable character in this drama, but i think mew also fits this category.

he puzzles me because at one point, it looked like he was about to take top in, but then i see him pushed top away especially when top was getting closer to him. i don't know what he's trying to do here; if he's ever genuine in wanting top to 'woo' him, or it's just mew wanting to have some 'fun' time by playing with top's ego.

mew said this relationship could work, but it depended on top. if top was sincere and diligent enough, mew might let top in. it's just another way of mew luring top into his trap, again, wanting to be the controller in this relationship. mew didn't want to give in that easily. if top wanted him, he had to keep trying.

i guess mew is holding onto this belief; if you want me, come and get me. i won't do the work. it's entirely on you.

this somehow also makes me believe top and mew are each other's mirrors. whoever top is, mew is like that too. whoever mew is, top resonates with his traits too.

"will you be my boyfriend?" top challenging mew's 'kindness'

the public proposal. honestly, i believed mew wouldn't say yes (but he DID. i kind of blacked out yesterday because of it).

but what was the purpose of it? well, i think it's just to prove boston wrong (again).

boston said they are the same; they don't do love. they don't settle. they won't have as much fun if they decide to be a faithful lover and only do it with their respective partners. this ticked top off because in no way top ever wanted to be equated to boston; he is a man of his own. he's number one. how dare boston thinks they are the same?

side note: this bombastic side eye reminded me so much of akk :') i have to say, akk and top have this similar boyish charm that is absolutely gratifying. however, akk is a certified green flag while top is mayday mayday red alert all the way.

hence, top decided to go to lengths; he asked mew to be his boyfriend publically.

i'm not sure about this, but i think there's a tendency for a public proposal to be successful just to 'save' face, and that was what mew told top in episode 2. he wasn't comfortable with these grand gestures because mew wanted his potential lover to respect him. clearly, top's proposal wasn't an act of respect as it was spontaneous and 'impulsive'.

but in one way or another, top did win this round because mew said yes— and that was all that mattered to top— winning mew over.

conclusion

episode 1 set the foundation of the characters and their dynamics with each other. however, i also believe episode 1's common theme is to let the games begin. i see this in topmew, sanray and bostonnick too. but i'm sorry for not diving deep into other pairs because my brain isn't brain-ing at this point hahahahaha.

i'm curious to see how far mew and top are going to lure each other into their 'territory' just to have the upper hand in this so-called 'game'. but again, as i said, they're just battling a losing game. they both will lose in the end, literally and figuratively.

[1 | 2 | 3 | 4 (i) | 4 (ii) | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12]

[sayakxmi]

A follow up to this post, except this time around I’m much less confident.

The problem with the dancestos is the fact that with how little information we have about them, most of it really boils down to how you interpret them, so I guess this is my interpretation of the canon dancestors.

...That I might change my mind about later.

Seriously. Take it with a grain of salt.

GOOD

Lawful -

Latula - I was considering her to be a Neutral Good, but after some thinking I’ve decided Lawful might be a bit more accurrate. The type of person to follow her personal code, that would also be devastated if she ended up breaking it.

Neutral -

Meulin - she’s genuinely very nice.

Mituna - he’s an asshole, but will go out of his way to save everybody if they need saving.

Chaotic -

Aranea - as much as she’d like to be seen as a Lawful Good, lawful she is not. Does what she considers the best course of action. Well-intentioned with questionable methods. / Snap!Aranea is probably a Chaotic Evil. Does what she wants with little regard to anybody.

Kankri - another case of “wants to be seen as a Lawful Good, but isn’t one”. Heart in the right place, but extremely overzealous. Tries to set rules that he ends up not following himself. Interrupting any potential signs of conflicts between his friends as we speak. Really, though, his time in the bubbles is apparently spent on quelling any arguments, whether they’re happening or not.

NEUTRAL

Lawful -

Cronus - he’s, well, awful, but I can’t exactly bring myself to see him as Evil. Mostly keeps to himself (unless he spots anything that breathes. or doesn’t. he’s not picky...), believes in the hemospectrum even though clamis not to... Has some patterns he follows and is genuinely unpleasant, but that’s kinda it. I genuinely considered him as Neutral Evil, but tbh, I feel like he’s the type who’d pretend to be a neutral evil, but it just lacks the necessary heat, y’know? Things might’ve looked a bit different before, though, he did mention something about trying to tone it down with aggessiveness. 

Horuss - he’s also awful, but not awful enough to be declared evil, even though I considered him as Neutral Evil, too. STRONGLY believes in rules and hierarchy, but is too selfish to be good, and just not enough malevolent to be evil.

Chaotic -

Rufioh & Porrim - both are very self-centered and value their own freedom above anybody else’s. Easily disregard others’ feelings, but aren’t exactly malevolent, either.

EVIL

Lawful -

Kurloz - unpopular(?) opinion, he gives me a much more “Lawful Evil” vibe than Chaotic. Gamzee’s more of a nihilistic force of destruction, Kurloz is an actual zealot. He’s dedicated to his cult enough he’d bite his own tongue off if he were to even consider something blasphemous.

Meenah - she’s awful. Really awful. But also not very dedicated to anything. Would sell you to the Mirthfull Messiahs for some pyrite. But her destructiveness comes and goes like waves, fittingly.

Snap!Damara - jumping around the timeline and causing absolute mayhem? That’s a force of destruction if you’d seen one. She seems to have calmed down in the bubbles but... has she? That unpredictability sure adds to everything. / Pre-Snap!Damara... no idea, honestly, we’ve never met her, only heard some stuff from very unreliable people. I’d like for to be a True Neutral, bc that empty spot annoys me, lmao. Might’ve been a Neutral Good, tho.