#i want to have stuff done soon b/c i love having written so much

[eachmostremembering]

like i have a lot of projects right now that are very romance-focused; there's the romance novel, the bear fic, the bear fic 2, the bear fic three, the bear fic 4, the a6 stuff i fuckin needed to finish two years ago, etc.

but like ngl the bear (and paterson) really got me renewed my belief in love again and that's great

[theteasetwrites]

SFW Alphabet: Scud

❧ Pairing: Scud x Female Reader ❧ Warnings: mentions of drug use ❧ From this template

❧ A/N: No one asked for this, but I feel like it needed to be done. I love Scud so much. 🥹💕 Also NSFW alphabet coming soon too…

❧ A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Scud is a hugger. He loves physical touch, he loves being affectionate. Nuzzling his head in the crook of your neck, playing with your fingers absentmindedly, laying on your lap and looking up at you until he falls asleep… He’s also not shy at all. Public displays of affection are essential to him. He loves to grab you by the waist and kiss you like no one’s looking, even if you’re in a crowded room.

❧ B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Scud is a great best friend. He’s fun and laid back, and he is generally pretty agreeable. Anything you suggest and he’ll do it—night on the town, or a night in, he’s down for anything.

I think the friendship would start with something like meeting in college or at a party. My personal headcanon is that Scud was an engineering student before he dropped out, so maybe you’d meet in class. Surely, I think he would be the one to strike up a conversation. Scud seems pretty outgoing and funny, so he’d probably try to butter you up with a few jokes (most of which don’t really land, but you find him cute and fun to talk to, so it’s okay).

❧ C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Oh, yes! Of course he loves to cuddle. Big time cuddler. I think he liked all kinds of cuddling, but his favorite is laying on your lap or resting his head between/on your boobs lol they make a great cushion. And as I mentioned before, he’s a big fan of public displays of affection, so cuddling in public is never an issue for him. He might pout a little if you tell him to knock it off, though.

❧ D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

I don’t think Scud is too interested in settling down, to be honest with you. I think he is fine with spending the rest of his life with one person, but I don’t think he cares much about marriage. I mean I guess if it’s something you really want and you can convince him then he’ll do it, I just don’t think he’s going to be super involved with the process. Scud is lazy. He likes shortcuts, and if he can convince you to get married in a courthouse he will. Good luck getting him in a monkey suit. “Not gonna happen, girlie,” he’d say.

As for cooking and cleaning, terrible. By far the worst at cooking and cleaning of any other Norman character I’ve written this for lol. Worse than Daryl and Murphy (I think Daryl is the best, and even he is not very good at it). Scud is one of those people who either doesn’t eat all day because he’s busy working on something or gets takeout for every meal. He has the worst eating habits and barely takes care of himself, but you try to step in and make sure he’s well-fed. How sweet. 🥹

❧ E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

I hate this one so much. I pretend I do not see it.

❧ F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

As mentioned, I don’t think Scud is interested in getting married. He’s fine with being committed. Maybe you’ll catch him reading a dirty magazine every once in a while, but that’s as close as he’ll get to cheating on you. He’s committed. He’s a big love bug. He loves you too much to hurt you.

Not quick at all. He doesn’t see the point. He figures you love each other and you live together and that’s all the two of you need.

❧ G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Pretty gentle. I think Scud sometimes forgets that he doesn’t have much of a filter so he’ll say stuff that he shouldn’t say, but he is learning. He’s trying to be as good for you as he can.

Physically, I think he’s also pretty gentle. He likes to give you pretty harsh squeezes, though, and lots of butt pinches and smacks, so he definitely has that side of him that’s not so gentle.

❧ H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Of course he likes hugs! He’ll take any physical touch he can get.

❧ I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

I think it would take him a while because he doesn’t really know what love is at first. He probably hasn’t really felt it before you, so he’s still trying to figure out what it means, but after a few hits of a joint, he’s got a pretty good idea of what love is, and it’s staring right back at him. “I love you, girlie,” he’d say, followed by a slightly delirious laugh. When you ask if he means it or if he’s just high, he says he means everything he says when he’s high.

❧ J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Not super jealous. He’s so laid back and pretty confident in himself, so he doesn’t have much to worry about. He knows you love him. The only time he might be jealous is if you’re paying more physical attention to someone else than you are him. He’ll demand to hold your hand or lean his head on your shoulder until you acknowledge him. He just wants to be the center of your attention, but most of the time he’s not going to make a big scene.

❧ K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Very sloppy and fast kisses. Lots of tongue and lots of teeth, too. He likes to bite you just a little, getting you to yelp and giggle into his mouth. I think Scud likes to bite and to be bitten… 👀

❧ L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

I think he really likes kids! I mean he’s hardly ever around them, but when he is, he likes to tell them little jokes and make funny faces at them. They often ask him about his little inventions and he tries to explain how he made them, in the hopes that maybe he’ll inspire a little spark of ingenuity, but mostly he just likes how fun they are to talk to. It’s very cute to see him interact with kiddos. They love Scud.

❧ M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Chaotic, I think. Mostly for you, not for him. Scud stays up really late working on stuff, so he basically always sleeps through the morning and wakes up around noon, which is inconvenient for you. While you’re cooking breakfast and trying to get to work on time, he’s out cold, probably drooling and snoring (it’s adorable, tbh). You try to wake him up and get him to eat something for breakfast, but he just mumbles something incoherent and plummets his face back into the pillow.

❧ N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Much more lively for Scud. He will take a break from his work to be with you, too. Those are the most intimate times between the two of you, usually spent in your bedroom watching a bad movie or smoking pot (whether or not you choose to partake is up to you lol). Scud gets philosophical at night, pondering about the great mysteries of the universe. He loves to go stargazing, so he’ll take you out in his van to some isolated field away from the city lights and hold you on the hood as he goes on and on about stuff that doesn’t really make a whole lot of sense, but you love hearing his voice, so you don’t mind.

❧ O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

I think Scud is a pretty open book. What you see is what you get (ignore the movie lmao), so it doesn’t really take a long time for him to open up.

❧ P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

Not easily angered at all. He hates conflict, and he’s very “go with the flow.” He might get frustrated sometimes, usually when his projects go awry, but for the most part, he’s relaxed. Probably has never raised his voice at you. He’s a lover, not a fighter.

❧ Q = Quizzes (How much do they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Oh man. Well, I don’t think Scud has a very good memory. He smokes a lot of weed. He is bound to be forgetful. I don’t think he does it on purpose at all, though. If he could remember everything, he would, but he does tend to forget short term things, and sometimes long term things like anniversaries, but never your birthday. I think he always has that pinned in his memory. He’s a good boyfriend in that way, but you do get a little annoyed when he forgets other things.

❧ R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

I feel like Scud really loves the funny moments. He likes thinking about all the times he made you laugh so hard you snorted or blew milk out of your nose or held your stomach as you chuckled. He loves your laugh and your smile, the way your nose crinkles, how you shake your head at him because he’s just too goddamn perfect.

❧ S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He’s lowkey very protective of you, since you live in a world where vampires exist, and Scud works for a vampire. Well, half vampire, but still. Luckily, Scud is pretty good with his hands and very inventive, so he constructs things like booby traps and tripwires and crazy explosives to keep you safe. He’d never let anything happen to you. That’s for sure.

❧ T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Minimal effort, to be honest. He’s lazy, and he doesn’t really put much effort into anything except his inventions. Still, he’ll do little things like maybe bring you flowers or something, and of course show you lots of affection.

❧ U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

POT. He smokes way too much pot. He’s basically constantly smoking in the movie sooo… But to be honest, I really think he’d at least try to cut down for you. I also think he’d try to cover up the scent in case you don’t like it.

❧ V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

Surprisingly, I think Scud actually puts a decent amount of effort into his look. He has a certain style, and it definitely shows. He is probably a little bit obsessed with his hair (especially since you like to run your fingers through it so much), and he definitely makes a conscious effort when he’s putting on all those necklaces (that choker… mmm). I think he knows how cute he is, for sure.

❧ W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Absolutely. He probably wouldn’t admit it, but he needs you. You’re the most responsible person in his life, and you balance him out. He needs you to keep him on track and not give into his lazy, apathetic nature. Oh, and he loves you. A lot.

❧ X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them)

I think Scud likes to dance. I think sometimes he’ll come up behind you, spin you around, and take you in his arms and just sloppily sway back and forth until you start moving on your own, and then it becomes a little dance party, usually ending up with both of you cackling on the sofa. Scud just seems like so much fun to me. Such a fun boyfriend. 💕

❧ Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

I think Scud hates judgmental people. He probably wouldn’t like that in a partner either. While I don’t think he’d care if his partner doesn’t smoke pot, I don’t think he’d want to be shamed for it. Still, if you asked him to cut back, I think he would. Mostly, I think he just doesn’t like negativity. He wants to love all the time.

❧ Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

Big cuddle bug. He won’t let you go, even in his sleep. Prepare to become a human teddy bear, because he’s going to hold you close to him all night long.

~

Thanks for reading! Likes, reblogs, and comments of any kind are always appreciated!

~

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Masterlist

[himbo-only-zone]

Can you do Rantaro fluff alphabet?

rantaro amami || fluff alphabet

Me? Getting a post out? Woah- /lh. Anyway, of course I can! Here ya go! Sorry if it's out of character, I've never written for him before! I'm glad I was able to, though!

- Mod Anna

a. attractive. what does he find attractive about you? he loves your hands, they fit perfectly in his. he'll kiss you knuckles happily before dragging you on, another adventure to pursue. he's excited to be anywhere with you, and knowing that you're holding his hand, by his side? that's amazing.

b. baby. would he like a family? he would! i can see him wanting to show a kid the world, point out cool things in pictures, telling wild stories about what happened while he was there. he wouldn't mind taking them on trips as well!

c. cuddle. how does he cuddle? he's usually the big spoon, and he loves you facing him. he's pretty protective, a hand usually pressed against your lower back and a soft kiss on your forehead. he's very gentle and loving with this sort of thing.

d. dates. what are dates with him like? usually you're doing something different that you haven't done before, dates are never the same. he likes to be spontaneous, but also have a little bit of an idea of what's going to happen. he likes to keep you completely in the dark, though, having you play guessing games, although he wouldn't tell you even if they're correct.

e. everything. what are you to him? (ex. you are my _____) you're his favorite adventure. out of everything he's done, everywhere he's been, the greatest adventure of all was finding out about you and learning every little thing that he's come to love.

f. feelings. when did he know he was in love? you two were on an adventure, and you were a bit scared of something, whether it be the bugs or the night. he held you close and said that you didn't have to do this for him, but you shook your head. you were dedicated, and wanted to be with him no matter what, even during a small adventure. that was enough.

g. gentle. is he gentle with you? he's pretty gentle, holding your hand with a tight enough grip not to hurt you, kisses just firm enough, and hugs just warm enough. he's very careful. he loves you more than anything, and he thinks about your well-being all the time.

h. hands. how does he like to hold hands? he likes your fingers interlocked. it doesn't have to be tight, it can even super loose. just as long as your hands are touching, he knows you're safe, and that's all he wants to know. he loves pressing kisses to your knuckles.

i. impression. what was his first impression of you? he saw that you had an interesting personality, that would match well with his own. he saw a possible future, and wanted to pursue it. he didn't waste too much time asking you out, but he did get to know you a little first.

j. jealousy. how often does he get jealous? he is a very chill person in general, so it's very unlikely that he'd get jealous. there is the occasional moment, but it's far from often. he refuses to show it, not wanting it to interrupt your relationships with other people. he wants you happy. you'll notice the little things soon, however.

k. kiss. how does he kiss? who initiated the first kiss? he's an amazing kisser. the kisses are firm, yet soft and sweet. they show his passion for you. it's always accompanied by a hand on your lower back, and the other gently cupping your cheek. to break it, he often smiles into it and stares into your eyes.

l. love. who says "i love you" first? he does. it's done when you two are on the way home from some date, his hand on your knee as he drives. at a stop light, he looks over at you and just smiles. “damn, i love you. a lot,” he says, taking your hand and kissing your knuckles.

m. memory. what's his favorite memory with you? every one. he takes pictures of every date, every little thing you two do together. he loves every moment he spends with you, and he cherishes it more than anything. all the memories with you fill him with more joy that you'd expect.

n. nickel. how much does he spend on you? well, you two share most of your money so it can go towards trips and stuff, but he makes sure to spend more than you do. you don't deserve to pay that much, he was the one who took you on all of this. he also buys you surprise souvenirs.

o. orange. what color reminds him of you? purple. it represents mystery in his eyes, and he likes to explore mystery with you. hand in hand, exploring the world together.

p. pet names. what pet names does he use? more often than not, he uses babe. it's classic, and it gets the point across. but he loves throwing in the occasional love, dear, or prince/princess. he loves seeing your reaction, it's his favorite.

q. quaint. what's a non-modern thing he does? he scrapbooks. y'know how all of his moments with you are special, and he takes pictures? all of those pictures are in a scrapbook. all of those little details are put in there, journal entries of the fun things, little pieces of leaves found where you were ... it's beautiful.

r. rainy days. what does he do with you on a rainy day? you two aren't able to get out, so the day is mostly spent laying on the couch and watching tv. you two need to rest sometimes, all of the adventuring gets tiring after a while. he has an arm tightly wrapped around you, pressing a kiss against your temple.

s. sad. how does he cheer you up? he insists on laying down with you and letting you vent about what's going on. he's stroke your cheek with one hand and hold your other one tight, listening to your every word. he wants to see you happy. you're amazing to him.

t. talking. what does he like to talk about? he likes learning about what makes you you. like your childhood, your parents, siblings if you have any. it makes him smile, knowing that you had an interesting past, no matter what it will be. and yes, he will be asking your parents for baby pictures.

u. unencumbered. what makes him relax? he likes taking soothing nature walks. he wants a house near the woods so that he can go out and relax if needed. he likes taking you with him, enjoying a comfortable silence together. it makes him feel a lot better.

v. vaunt. does he show you off? you two are a pretty loving couple in general, so yes? he doesn't really do it intentionally, but if he catches someone staring, he'll smirk happily and pull you a little closer. a quick kiss to the forehead, and he'll walk away with you in his arms. he's so happy with you.

w. wedding. when, how, and where does he propose? he would want something simple, but at a really nice place. on the top of a mountain, the view absolutely beautiful. he pulls out a ring with is extremely simple, maybe one small diamond, but it holds so much meaning. “s/o ... you know i love you. most of what i would say would be me repeating myself over and over again, but ... being your husband would be the best adventure of my life. will you marry me?”

x. xylophone. what song reminds him of you? what's your theme song? honeypie by jawny reminds him of you! your them song is desert island disk by radiohead!

y. yes. does he think about proposing to and marrying you? he would love that! going on adventures with his wife/husband/life partner? being able to call you that to people when asked? god, it'd make him feel like the best man in the world. he loves you more than anything.

z. zebra. if he could have a pet, what would he get? from such an adventurous man, you'd expect something exotic, right? hell no, he would be insistent on getting a big dog. he loves big dogs. and they're his best friend. no questions asked.

[loveyhoneydovey]

SFW Alphabet with Joaquín Torres

Note: I've been dying to write something like this so I decided to do it with my baby first. Might do Sam next

All my stories are written with a bisexual reader of colour in mind, but anyone else is more than welcome to read them

Joaquín Torres x GN!Reader

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

He’s a very affectionate partner and especially shows his love through physical affection and acts of service. He wants to feel useful and do his best to make life easier and more enjoyable for you.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

He’d be the type of best friend that’s not physically there often, due to the nature of his job. However, when you do get a chance to spend it feels like he’s never been gone. He completely focuses on you, asks for updates about your life and checks if you need anything. He’s so chill and he’s got the type of personality that has you at ease. You first met him at a mutual friend’s wedding, you both got a bit tipsy and decided to hang out with each other and that was the start of a beautiful friendship

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

YES!!! As I previously mentioned, he loves physical touch and cuddling is one of his favourite ways of showing affection. He loves being the small spoon and he’s not ashamed to say it. He says it’s because you make him feel safe and makes him feel like he has a home to go back to after all the shit he sees

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He wants to settle down for sure, eventually. Before meeting you, he thought that would come later, but you definitely made him rethink. I don’t think he’s the best cook, but I think he has a few of recipes of food his mom made him when he was younger. Those are the ones he learned to perfect. As for cleaning, because of how strict his life is at the army, I think he allows himself to be a bit messy at home. Definitely messy and not dirty. You both try to split house chores evenly.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

I think he’d be honest and would do it in person. Ending a relationship that played such an important part in his life is definitely heartbreaking, but he thinks he owes it to himself and to you to put an end to it before it gets worse. He’d rather end things on semi good terms than letting it sour and go nowhere.

F = Fiancé(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

He always told himself, when it came to relationships, he’d go with the flow and see how he felt about long-term commitment. He’s a m*ilitary boy, so I think he kinda (unintentionally) follows the stereotype and proposes quickly. Although in his case he does it because he’s truly in love with you and doesn’t want to wait longer than he has to make you his. He’d propose after about a year and a half I’d say.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Have you seen him? He’s the gentlest sweetest baby in every way. I think the fact that he sees so much violence and horror during his deployment pushes him to be more gentle in other aspects of his life. More specifically with you and his family. He wants you to feel like you can come to him for anything whether it’s when you’re feeling down or when you’ve cut your finger on a piece of glass. Either way he’ll treat you with kindness, but not like you’re breakable.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

omg he LOVES hugs. Again, due to the nature of his job, he doesn’t get a lot of physical affection, which drives him crazy. So when he’s home, you can expect him to attack you with hugs all day long. Doesn’t matter if you’re washing the dishes or brushing your teeth. He’ll come up from behind and wrap his arms around your waist, while putting his chin on your shoulder. If you’re facing him, he’s going to engulf you and wrap his arms around you. His hugs are warm and comforting and make you feel safe.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

oh real quick, but actually so do you. I actually headcanon that you two say it at the same time by accident. You both were probably nervous because it was after like two months, but end up laughing it off cause you were so in sync.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He understands the root of jealousy is mostly insecurity, so he doesn’t get jealous often, because he’s secure in his relationship with you and is actually pretty confident with himself. Of course, it happens occasionally, he’s only human. However, you both always thought that feeling jealous sometimes wasn’t bad, but what could lead to issues was the way one could act on it. So, whenever he feels jealous he takes a moment to collect his thoughts if he needs to, then you’d both talk about it.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses are often playful and sweet. He doesn’t like to take himself too seriously and neither do you, so you keep things light and playful, but that doesn’t mean it’s not passionate. On the contrary, you feel his love for you with every kiss he leaves on you skin. His favourite place to kiss you is on the nose, because of the way you scrunch it and giggle after he kisses it. As for where he liked to be kissed, soon after you started dating, you found out he loved being shirtless which allowed you to notice he had a beauty mark on the upper part of his right shoulder. From that moment, you developed a habit of kissing it and it made him melt, so it became his favourite place to be kissed.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Oh the BEST. For some reason he attracts them. You told him it was probably because he was a child himself and he flipped you off. You actually think it’s because he’s so cheerful and happy, and he treats them like they’re his friends. You’ve caught him having full on conversations with your friends’ babies who couldn’t even speak yet. And once you had kids, he did the same thing with them.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Whenever possible, you have lazy mornings where you alternate between sleeping, having lazy morning sex and snacking. If it’s a regular morning, he usually has to leave before you, and every time you’d try to distract him and make him stay a bit longer. He’s so used to your “five more minutes, please” that he started waking up five minutes earlier.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

This man has a whole skincare routine before going to sleep. If you also do, then you both complete your routines side by side in front of the bathroom mirror. He might read a bit before bed (and you try to sneakily take a pic of him in his glasses cause you think he looks so cute), or you’d both talk about your day and maybe cuddle a bit before turning off your lamps and getting some sleep.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He’d open up slowly, there was no pressure between the two of you and he took his time to share the more difficult parts of his life. Now if you open up to him about something defining or traumatic that happened in your life, he might open up faster to let you know you’re not alone, but also to reciprocate the trust you put in him.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He’s pretty patient most of the time and tries to not let himself get angry over little things, however he’s still human. So depending on the gravity of the situation, he might get angered quickly if he sees something upsetting happening, however, he’s very careful with the way he reacts. He knows something done in anger can lead to regret and guilt, so he thinks before he acts and speaks.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

I think he’d remember an important date like your birthday, he knows around what time your anniversary is, but I feel like he would forget which date it is exactly. He’d remember the most random facts about you, like the kind of stuff where you think he was paying attention, but he was listening subconsciously.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Cliché, but it was during your honeymoon. It was the first time you had referred to him as your husband and it made his heart swell with pride. The love you held for him was so obvious when you looked at him.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He’s protective when he needs to be. He’s not overbearing and trusts that you’re capable of taking care of yourself most of the time. He will step in if he feels like a situation is escalating (let’s say if you’re getting physically or verbally harassed) and he will put himself physically between you and whoever’s trying to harm you.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Omg listen this baby puts so much effort into making your dates enjoyable. He plans out full picnics with cute cakes and charcuterie boards and that doesn’t stop as your relationship progresses. Any gifts he gives you usually have a meaning behind them, and he doesn’t always buy them, sometimes he makes them himself. As I said, he is a bit messy in his daily life, but you two actually have a chart with who’s supposed to do what and that’s how you share your chores, and he does mostly follow it.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He has a habit of leaving some important stuff until the last minute. It works out in the end, but it causes him an unnecessary amount of stress.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

… have you seen the amount shirtless selfies Danny takes? I think Torres is the exact same. So, he does like to take care of his looks, especially when he sees the effect it has on you. And he has to stay in shape either way, due to his job

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

I think he’d be heartbroken and might feel incomplete for the first few months, but as time goes one, he begins to feel whole again and learns to feel self sufficient.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He wants to learn another language fluently someday. He wants to help people and he thinks there’s no better way than being able to understand their needs in their native language to be able to help

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

I think he doesn’t like the smell of cigarettes or smoke. He doesn’t mind if his partner’s a smoker, but he probably wouldn’t be around them while they’re smoking.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

This boy sleeps in the weirdest, funniest positions. Like you’d go to sleep in a normal position side by side, or with your back to him, then when you’d wake up you’d find him in a new position every time.

[fawnhunter]

Lincoln Clay SFW A-Z

- written with a chubby reader in mind, but that’s not the main focus at all.

!: possible suggestive themes. nothing too serious tho

A= activites- what do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

When Lincoln does have time to spend with you [ Aside from any missions he takes you on] he likes to take you out to do things. He will take you to areas and districts he has already claimed so that it’s safe for the two of you. And then he leaves it up to you. You want dinner? You got it. You wanna go to a show? You got it. You wanna have a night in with just you and him? You can have that too. But he wants to show you off.

B=beauty- what do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Lincoln enjoys his s/o’s shoulders/chest. He thinks that your collar bones are beautiful, and he enjoys a sweetheart neckline. When he sees you during the day, his arms always find their way around your shoulders. And at night in the bed, he wraps his arms around your shoulders and crushes you against his side. His face finds its way to your neck and chest by the end of the night

C=comfort- How would they help their s/o during hard times or when they need it most?

When you come to him with an issue, and it so happens that you ended up getting hurt or threatened. Then he handles the issue right away, he may have other things to do but you are at the top of his list. He will make sure you never have to deal with this issue again. If the issue happened to be more emotional, he may not be as much help. But he will hold you until you pull yourself together and assure you that he has your back.

D= dreams- how do they picture their future with their s/o?

All Lincoln knows is that he wants you for as long as he can keep you. He will continue to fight to keep you, but he knows some day soon his story will come to an end. The thought that his life is not guaranteed is the only reason why your future is iffy.

E= equal- are they the dominant one or are they more passive in your relationship?

As much as my switch ass hates to admit it, he ends up being the more dominant one in the relationship. He leads the way day in and out. Let you know when to go and where. Stands in front of you when you go places, and nudges you behind him a little for most conversations. Checks in on you all the damn time, and does most of the stuff for you when at home, even when you insist you can handle it.

F= Flirting- how often do they flirt or tease their s/o? How smooth are they?

He is flirting with you every chance he gets. Sly little things whisper into your ear when you try making breakfast. Lingering touches when you begin getting dressed for the day. Filthy things said over the dinner table, just to startle you a little. Smoother than he should be. Every move he makes has the ability to lead into a quickie somewhere. A dangerous man indeed.

G= Gratitude- How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o does for them?

Lincoln is very grateful for you. He knows he can be considered scary, he hears it enough from the people on the street. But his heart swells every time he returns to your shared Apartment and all of you are still there. He Doesn't know how he would patch himself up if you were there as well, you keep him clean and healthy after a long day.

H=Honesty- do they have any secret that they keep from their s/o or do they share everything

Lincoln doesn’t talk about the things he did during the war, he will talk about his time, and about the activities he did with donovan. But he leaves out the gross gorey details, he doesn't want to come off as a monster

I=Inspiration- did their s/o change something about them or is it the other way around? (it could be personal issues or just trying new day to day things)

You have reminded him that there is still a little heart within him. When he comes home, he tries to remind himself that this is you. And that you love him. And he tries to put that hardcore, Sal killing mindset away, and just tries to relax

J=jealousy- do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

I don't think that he is given many chances to get jealous. I think he knows that the two of you are in a relationship, and I think that he would have trust for you. If he ever does get jealous, he will bring it up and maybe ask a question. But he really just wants peace of mind not to create problems for the two of you.

K=kiss- how do they kiss? What was the first kiss like?

Well for starters Lincoln alway kisses you when he sees you, and when he's saying goodbye. These kisses are short and chaste, just enough to give a taste of you for good measure. His other kisses are always more intense, his hand squeezing your waist or thread through the hair on the back of your neck, just to hold you in place while he kisses you. Breathes in the scent of you deeply and doesn't let you go until he’s done kissing you

L=Love confession- How did it go down?

He was hurt pretty badly after a mission. It seems like all the adrenaline shots in the world couldn't help his case. He was hurting real bad, but all he could think about was coming to you, and making you the last thing he sees, before his time is up. But your home appeared closer than he thought it would, and before collapsing on your doorstep he knocked on the door. [Ever the gentleman] And After hearing your concerned gaps and the watering of your eyes and felt safe enough to sleep. And when he woke up, the first thing he saw was your form right next to him. He had to let you know how felt, before he never got the chance again

M=Marriage- do they want to get married? How do they propose? Wedding day description?

Marriage may seem like a far off dream for Lincoln. The only thing he sees set in stone for his future is Sal Marcono’s death. I think Under different circumstances, with Sammy still alive, he would be a married man for sure.

N=nicknames- what do they call their s/o?

Puddin

Peaches

Darlin

Honey

O=Obsessed- how protective are they of their s/o? How much are they worried about them?

Lincoln is as protective as one can be. When at your home, he is alway in the same room as you. He may be doing something like reading a file, or fixing his guns but his glance always finds its way back to you. When he is out with you he is your shadow, right behind you or almost flanking you. He worries about you sometimes, when he has to leave the area of your home, he finds himself calling you, or asking Donovan to check up on you.

P=PDA- are they obvious about the relationship? Do they talk a lot about his s/o? Are they okay with affection in front of others?

Lincoln does not just go running around yelling about you. That being said his immediate crew does know about you, sometimes with you coming with him on missions you run into them. Cassandra and Vito are favorable to you, And Burke is.. well.. Burke. PDA in front of the other is rare as when you two are out together there is rarely time for that.

Q= Quirk- some random ability they have in a relationship

Lincoln is just a little touch starved, the human contact he receives is associated with pain and lies. So i think he won't ever need any space, sit next him, on his lap, look over his shoulder when he reads. Just touch him he loves it

R=Romance- how romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o smile? Are their ideas rather original or creative?

Lincoln takes any chance he has to be romantic.When he isn’t trying to get things done, he likes to spend his time with you. Dates outside of your home are not a common occurrence, he just doesn’t feel like he can really keep you safe. His romance has more of a catering feel. He shadows you a lot so you find yourself not needing to grab things or reach on your own, he’s already one step ahead of you. He likes to make you laugh by being his cute butterbean self.

S=support- do they push their s/o to do better? Do they believe in them?

lincoln isn't the type of person to get to involved in his S/o’s personal life, i mean we all know he is a busy man. If he does push his S/o to do better it's because he knows it's something his S/o is passionate about. He wants the best for you and believes in you as well, he just isn't overbearing about it and may need to be reminded to express that verbally sometimes.

T=thrill- are they okay with a certain routine or do they need some spice every once in a while?

Lincoln needs routine in his life. He has spent most of it away at war where nothing is ever the same. And when he attempted to rebuild his life the first time, everything went sideways. Knowing exactly what going to happen when he comes to see you is something that make him feel stable, and it is something that he craves

Understanding- how well do they know you? Are they sensitive to your emotions?

If Lincoln has committed to being your S/o then he knows you like the back of his hand. He knows when you have good days and bad ones and is always ready to step in and lend a hand

V=Value- how important is your relationship compared to other things in their life?

This question is a little tricky for Lincoln because he has a job to do . He loves you but he also knows that this is a thing he needs to get done. And in order to do that sometimes his job may have to come before you. In the names of people on his list, you are at the top. If you are not his first thought then you are the second.

W=Wild card-Random Fluff bomb!!

Lincoln finds great pleasure in being helpful towards you any time he can get involved in something you’re doing, he wants to be the one who helped you finish.

X=XOXO- how affectionate are they? Are they a cuddle bug or do they like their space?

Because he can always see you, he tends to be very affectionate with you. In his day to day life he doesn't get much healthy skin to skin contact, so any chance he has to get some love from you he takes it. He is a cuddle bug, when you take a seat on the couch he sits next to you but much closer than he should be. When out in public his arm finds its way around your waist and shoulders on its own.

Yearning- what happenes when they miss you

When he misses you he finds anyway he can to reach out to you and tell you that he loves you. He most likely has a memento that you've given him in the past that he keeps on him for moments like this. Other than that he gets really solemn, he punches a little harder so he can have a reason for you to clean him up.

Zzz- how do you both fall asleep/nap

When sleeping you both are engulfed in each other. His arms wrapped around you pressing you to him as tight a possible. One leg thrown over his side and your arms around his neck keeping him close to your chest. ITs hot and sticky and gross but you can hear his heartbeat and the sound of his breathing and decide that it's worth it.

[kitkatopinions]

The sad thing is that Blake's most healthiest option romance wise is someone who gives her space and willing to let her go. Sun fits this description perfectly. But they went with a codependent toxic relationship partially held together by guilt in which one side is clearly submissive and the other too worried and insecure.

Yeah, tbh, the send off to Sun at the start of volume six made me think they would pick up the relationship where it left off eventually for a couple different reasons, but one of them was this reason.

I want to preface this post by saying that A. I don’t really like Bumblebee and I don’t need a reason to dislike it even though I have reason to dislike it, B. I’ve shipped BlackSun from Sun’s first introduction, and C. also I’m coming at this as someone who has been in a co-dependent relationship, so all three of those things means I’m naturally a little biased. I’m not pretending this is all a super objective, impersonal interpretation. This is just me talking honestly about my thoughts towards a ship I don’t like. Bees, I’m sorry if this shows up in your tags, Tumblr is being screwy and I’m not trying to rain on anyone else’s posts. I’m using filterables and putting this under a keep reading to try and make it easier for Bumblebee fans to not see this.

I had - when I saw season six’s opening ep - given the show mad props for writing a romance driven relationship where the partners didn’t have to stay together all the time to still care about each other and be secure. It felt like the perfect move to me to get some distance between their characters while firmly establishing that Sun had never done the things he’d done ‘to win the girl,’ and didn’t consider himself ‘letting Blake go.’ Sun not only being willing to spend this time away from Blake, but to not even need it really said, and to have his own stuff he needed to do as well... All of that felt like a healthy, independent relationship. I don’t mean to get personal on main, but I’ve been in a relationship where I felt partially responsible for my partner’s happiness and he tried to do things like keep me from my friends or guilt me into things. I ignored the red flags because our relationship was important to me, but it made me feel pretty unhappy because I was always worried that if I didn’t do the things he wanted, he would get upset and over-react, and put himself down until I built him back up, and if we didn’t spend the majority of our time together, he would start talking about feeling like I didn’t really care that much about him and how lonely he felt. This was really exhausting to me, especially since I’m an introvert.

Sun always seemed like such a good partner for Blake because he was always so self-possessed, so confident in who he was already, independent and happy and accepting of Blake’s independence. Sun was always there for Blake, but he also was the one usually pushing her towards interacting with others too, they were able to go do separate things and even go on completely different missions with confidence and without drama. For a character who had previously been in a destructive, possessive, controlling, abusive relationship, it had seemed like a scene that clearly established Blake and Sun’s relationship as one where Sun wasn’t expecting Blake to stay with him all the time, respected her goals and her independence, and had his own life and his own friends too. I had kind of just assumed that the choice to have Sun leave the group and go to Vacuo was to further their relationship. Upon rewatching the scene later now that I know that the writers were already starting to try to implement Bumbleby, I can see how the show writers might’ve been intending that scene to be an amiable goodbye where Sun confirms to Neptune that they aren’t actually an item with his ‘it was never about that.’ But I just have to shake my head, because I was giving the writers credit for something they didn’t do.

Instead, they were trying to tie off the relationship between Sun and Blake by having him leave, not cementing Blake’s independence and Sun’s encouragement of that (and they tied it off badly imo because Blake freakin’ kissed the boy lol.) And once they had Sun leave, they started setting Blake up with Yang. I want to clarify that there’s nothing wrong with the writers deciding to go with Blake x Yang, and the ship itself was not a totally baseless one. I’m personally disappointed that one of my favorite RWBY ships isn’t going to be endgame, and I personally don’t like the idea of Blake and Yang as a couple. But my problem isn’t really with the ship itself, it’s with how the show writers have chosen to write the ship in execution.

Getting past the queerbaitery nature of Bumblebee as a ship, the choices surrounding Blake and Yang seem faulty on both sides (which I also think is important to remember. I’ve seen loads of people recognizing that Bumblebee as written in the show is destructive to Blake, but I’ve seen much fewer people talk about how it’s not the best for Yang too.)

Let’s start from the fact that Blake is an abuse victim. She was previously in a relationship with Adam and talks about his destructive and violent behavior. Blake has a really hard time trusting people because of how Adam had acted. He was explosive, manipulative, and he got angry at and hurt Blake specifically for leaving him. The last thing Blake would need is a relationship where she feels personally responsible for the stability of another person. The last thing she needs is to be pressured into staying with someone. The last thing she needs is to be expected to be with that person without the option of ever working with others. The last thing she needs is to be in a relationship where she can’t be apart from someone even temporarily without that person getting anxious and insecure or without having to feel guilty and like she did something wrong.

And yet the show has her in a relationship with someone that has abandonment issues. The show has her promise to stay with Yang in a moment of huge trauma, Blake crying out a desperate denial to the accusations of the abusive ex who had made her life hell, after he tried to again separate her from anyone she loved and she was forced to kill someone she had once deeply cared about. It was also a really weird choice of the writers to have the characters respond to a question over if they’d ever thought about working with other partners with dismissive and cold behavior as if the very idea was somehow wrong (especially since Yang spent quite a bit of time pre-volume six working with Weiss and Blake spent so much of her time working with Sun.) And the writers chose to frame Blake and Yang leaving on temporary separate missions in volume eight to result in insecurity and anxiety from Yang and guilt for Blake. On top of that, Yang is a person with a strong temper and aggressive tendencies. Although she seemed to be trying to work through those problems in seasons four and five, Yang backslid and seems just as controlled by her anger and her insecurities as her volume 2 self now, who had lashed out at Blake and angrily pushed her for not listening in ‘burning the candle.’

As for Yang, she lost her mom when she was very young (Ruby was a toddler,) and her dad temporarily shut down after that. She soon found out her biological mom had left her when she was a baby and spent her whole life wondering why while her uncle spent that time flitting in and out of her life and taking on dangerous missions - the same types of missions that had killed the woman who had raised Yang for the first part of her life. Yang has deep seeded fears of being abandoned and losing her loved ones, and she also has a history of trying to take care of and support the people around her even at her own personal expense. While Yang’s more selfless moments in season five - like giving up her dream of getting answers from Raven to follow and protect Ruby even when she clearly wasn’t wholly healed from her trauma - are admirable, what Yang absolutely doesn’t need in a partner is someone who she feels like she has to protect and save and sacrifice for. What Yang absolutely doesn’t need in a partner is someone she feels like she can’t rely on to be there for her. What she doesn’t need in a partner is someone who can’t give her stability or struggles to trust her. What she doesn’t need in a partner is someone who won’t call her out when she goes a little too far. And yet the writers chose to put Yang with someone who runs on the regular, the only member of their team who thought Yang might be lying about Mercury, someone who needs time and distance when Yang clearly needs someone who is consistent and present. And then the writers made it so that Yang and Blake spend very little time with anyone else. The writers made it so that they can’t be apart without guilt and anxieties.

And you guys, Blake in seasons 6-8 feels so needy. She’s consistently in need of saving, consistently doesn’t stand for herself, seems like she needs a lot of reassurance in her relationship, she’s consistently waiting for other people to make moves, etc. Even when Blake convinces Yang to divulge top secret information to Robyn, when Ironwood confronts them about it, Blake backs up and leaves Yang to explain their actions. In the early seasons, it feels like Yang cares more about their friendship than Blake does and that she’s putting in more effort, which don’t get me wrong, makes total sense since Blake had just gotten out of an abusive relationship and Yang’s clear anger problems (and her using a laser pointer to try and force Blake to talk to her,) might’ve made Blake hesitant to get close to or open up to Yang. But while it no longer feels like Yang cares more, it still feels like Yang puts in more work. Yang is constantly reassuring, protecting, comforting, and stepping up for Blake, while Blake is so passive and acts so dependent that I personally can’t help but feel like Yang must be exhausted. Yang needs stability and reassurance too, Yang needs a partner she can talk to and rely on to be there. When the writers did write Blake as trying to comfort and take care of Yang, it was way too much and had undertones of ableism. And I know, I know they had this ‘we’re taking care of each other’ moment when they were fighting Adam, but that’s just what we were told for one scene, and not what we’ve actually seen in their relationship.

The worst thing is that it didn’t need to be that way. Bumbleby could’ve been a really good ship that built on their foundation. Blake used to be an independent, brave, strong, active character. Blake stood up for herself to Weiss, told Ozpin to his face that he needed to do more for the Faunus, used to have a great, creative fighting style, used to be this sassy girl who’d banter with Sun and with Yang and when she did start opening up to Yang, it was a great way to start evolving their characters to be a strong relationship. In V3 when Blake admitted that she had doubts about Yang due to her past experiences with Adam, but opened herself up and decided to trust Yang anyway when Yang looked her in the eyes and told her sincerely exactly what had happened... That was so great and it really showed off the dynamic the two of them were starting to adapt. CRWBY might’ve immediately separated the two, but A. Seasons four and most of season five had great set up for them to work through their problems and then continue to grow that great dynamic we started seeing in the first three seasons. And B. their respective arcs continued their growth as characters even apart from each other. While I wish that RWBY had let the two work some of this out together, the growth that we were getting did make them more suited for each other. I’ll always ship BlackSun. But Yang getting a hold on her emotions, maturing, starting to work through her abandonment issues, and displaying just what a caring, honest person she was, at the same time that Blake was working through her past and her fears, learning to let people in, strengthening her resolve, and coming into her own as a leader... Come on, those two characters could’ve easily developed a good, healthy, strong, independent relationship and I’m legitimately sad that’s not what we got, especially since we sacrificed so much of Blake’s personality to get a worse ship.

I don’t even know what to say about it, tbh. Idk what else the writers expected us to think with how they wrote things. I’ve heard before that there was probably a cut scene in volume eight that included Yang and Blake fighting (which would then justify Yang and Blake’s reactions when they reunited,) and I do believe that, but the writers chose not to include it, and that made them look worse as a couple. Just like they chose not to include a scene where Blake and Yang work through the problem of Blake having left Yang without a word of explanation at the end of Volume 3. And they didn’t include a scene where Blake explains herself and Yang realizes that maybe she was being a little shortsighted about the trauma Blake had also gone through. And they didn’t include a scene where Blake actually learned that she didn’t have to protect or take care of Yang in volume six. And they haven’t included a scene where Blake puts just as much effort into their relationship as Yang does. And they didn’t include a scene where the two make it clear that they’re fine being apart. If anything, CRWBY has established the opposite, and it isn’t enough to just say that they’re taking care of each other, when they don’t show that to be the case. 

Sun being not only willing to let Blake be with others, go her own way, and be her own person, but encouraging of that, made him a very compelling romantic prospect for her. Unfortunately I just don’t see that with Blake and Yang. Their relationship feels co-dependent, and maybe it’s just my personal experience talking and making me chafe, but I personally just don’t like it.

However, fans have been queerbaited long enough. So personal opinions aside, CRWBY give Bumblebee some confirmation you fucking cowards.

[rainbowsky]

More on the Fan Fic issue

I have a few more asks about the issue raised the other day, some of which are long and go into detail on the 'wars' that have been happening on Twitter and AO3.

Sorry for grouping these but I wanted to put it all under a cut because these are long, and also in case people don't want to dig into these issues (which would be understandable).

Anonymous 1 asked:

"I am very strongly of the opinion that the BJYX term is still a fandom umbrella term" I agree. Mainly because Bjyx is the most popular. Many antis always say bjyx, and have no idea the others. So sometimes it's easier just to say bjyx instead of explaining all three. I myself more like "who cares as long as they happy." So I enjoy Yizhan in all contexts. Many bxgs I know also like that, mostly ibxgs. I think deep down all bxgs (no matter which position they prefer) just want Yizhan to be happy

Not sure we can be so certain about that last part, Anon (I think for a lot of people GG and DD are just characters in a smutty story they have in their heads), but I agree about the term being popular regardless of the type of fans people are.

From what I can see the BJYX term seems to be used 80-90% umbrella, 10-20% dynamic in both international and c-social media (for every 10 times you see the term used, only one or two of those usages - probably less - are referring to a dynamic). This is my totally unscientific estimation, but I think even 10-20% dynamic is being generous. The number of people who are fixated on a sexual dynamic aren't nearly as large as they'd like to believe.

Anonymous 2 asked:

about the promptfests - i’ve been on twitter since early 2020 and what i’ve noticed is that this influx bjyx-only promptfests started gaining speed once lots of rational voices started leaving the fandom recently either because a) new interests have caught their attention or b) the toxicity of the popular bxg circles on twitter have become too much to handle.

gdgdbaby was usually the organizer of dynamic-inclusive events, and she’s received lots, and lots, and lots of backlash by bxg, sometimes even by accounts with thousands followers, for using bjyx as a catch-all term. and as her interest in yizhan has since waned—hopefully for reasons unrelated to fandom toxicity—many of the people who were attracted to the welcoming environment she created distanced themselves as well.

zsww/lsfy fans have become an outnumbered circle who try their best to create exclusive events to avoid the “is bjyx a catch-all term” discourse, but never seem to gain as much traction as gdgdbaby (who has a sizeable following) or those who host bjyx-only events (who also have sizeable followings).

meanwhile the dynamic war has only become more and more hostile and bjyx is clearly the more populated group… ao3 is simply a battlegrounds, if i may dramatize the situation a little for the sake of humor, and the promptfests are a reaction to this irritating t/b discourse that has made bxg twitter completely inhospitable for me…and lots of other fans too.

(i’ve also noticed a huge reinforcement as of recently where ppl will call gg laopo, a milf, an omega, etc even outside of rpf (i.e. posting pictures of him at events and saying he looks pregnant or he’s going into heat) and it’s just… uncomfortable.)

(also please note i have a biased account of all of this drama bc many of my friends were harassed over it, and anyone who disagrees with my take may feel free to interject.)

I took the liberty of adding paragraph breaks because they are pretty important for some readers, particularly ND readers like me.

It's sad to hear how fucked up everything has become, but I'm not even remotely surprised. Toxicity leads to toxicity, and the whole idea of dividing up a RP fandom by sex position was misguided from the outset - no matter why it was done or how good the intentions might have been.

And yes, like I said, these people aren't just framing things this way for fan fic. This is how they talk about IRL GGDD.

I had written a lengthy essay here about homophobia in the fandom but deleted it all. Perhaps I'll post it separately at some later point. Suffice it to say that this stuff creates a climate that's often hostile for queer people. So much of it is deeply homophobic, whether people are aware of it or not.

It's really sad to hear about gdgdbaby being mistreated in any way. Anyone who steps up and sticks their neck out to help organize and coordinate activities that benefit a broader group of people should be celebrated and supported, not run out of town by an angry mob.

I've read some of her stories and even have one or two on my rec list. And here's someone who is not only writing good works, but also supporting others to write more good works. Such a shame.

Anonymous 3 asked:

Hello Mr. RBS! I think I can chime in a bit about the fanfic topic as I’ve watched this all unravel on twitter (where a majority of authors/readers are). I apologize if this gets long but it’s been something that’s also been on my mind.

I want to preface this by saying that I’m not a fan of the distinctions of dynamics as, like you said, the supposed line between real life and fanfic is long gone, so I’m not trying to be biased against one group over another.

Short answer to the question of, “is this retaliation?” : I do believe it is. (From here onwards I’ll be using bjyx as the dynamic term just for the ease of simplicity.) To understand why, I’ll have to explain with a bit of background info. On twitter, I’d say that there’s a quite large divide between bjyx and zsww/lsfy. That itself isn’t really a problem because people are free to like what they like and associate with whoever.

However there is a big problem where bjyx people are not just bjyx but also anti-zsww/lsfy. To the point where I’ve seen people say that they feel physically ill when they accidentally read zsww. I don’t think this type of behavior should exist in any dynamic bc in the end GGDD are real people with a real relationship behind this content and it’s just a gross fetishization at that point.

With all this happening, zsww/lsfy people have gotten more outspoken on how GG is often portrayed in those types of scenarios, mainly the over-feminization of him, bc it’s not just done in the context of fanfic but regular discussion of GGDD at this point. This tension between the dynamics kind of boiled over when the pregnant xz fest was announced, as you can take a guess at how that went over with zsww/lsfy people. lol.

But around that same time, another zsww/lsfy event was announced (I’m not sure if it’s the one anon was talking about) but the creator of the event suddenly got a ton of backlash for excluding bjyx, with the reasoning that bjyx is technically a part of lsfy. But the event was done to highlight zsww/lsfy (as all specific events are) bc the community and content for these dynamics are much less than bjyx.

Which is how we come back to the starting point of, is all this recent bjyx stuff retaliatory. I believe so bc the events (preg fest, dark event) are very specific prompts that target exactly what zsww/lsfy people have been outspoken against.

As to the point anon made about trying to drown out the tags, keep in mind that zsww/lsfy content is very minimal compared to bjyx and has only just recently started to gain more traction. I think most people would love to just peacefully exist in their own circles but I don’t see this problem between dynamics disappearing anytime soon.

Like I said with the above Anon, I've added paragraph breaks for ND readers.

What a mess.

I have absolutely nothing useful to say here about the fandom on AO3 and how it's managed by community members, but I do think it's unfortunate that people choose to be war-like rather than make space for diverse voices, and I think it's a real shame that some people have been essentially run out of the fandom because of this garbage.

Thanks for giving some context for how/why the major shift in tone of fan fic lately. I had no idea any of this was going on.

I urge people to work hard to give space for all voices and perspectives, and not just the ones they favor. I'd also urge people to reflect on how their thoughts, behavior and actions in the fandom might affect queer people in the fandom.

As always, we have no control over what other people do, say or think. All we have any control over is how we respond to what other people do, say or think. Hopefully we'll chose the path of peace and try to avoid fan wars or fights that only ruin the experience for everyone.

I guess one thing I'd ask any of the Anons who have written me about this issue - or anyone who has thoughts about it - is, what can we as readers/fans who care about diversity of voices and perspectives do to support that here and on AO3, without getting involved in any kind of war?

[obeymeluv]

The Bros and School Headcanons

I have other stuff in mind but this is something short I can put out for now.

It’s my headcanon on the types of school/college people the bros are. I guess you can consider it college AU?

Lucifer

The Type-A asshole everyone probably hates

Doesn’t originally start out that way, doesn’t mean for people to hate him. Soon LIVES for it. Seriously, it’s like his coffee.

Prideful AF. MUST be top of the class!

His motto: “Do it right, do it once.”

Runs on an insane amount of coffee and just as insane (read: little) amount of sleep

The type to remind the teacher about assignments that were due in class if it seems like they’re going to forget about it

Asks about extra credit on day one

If people ask repeat questions that were LITERALLY just answered, he gets pissy and silently suffers

Ends up a little sad and burnt out, wondering if the grade was worth skipping out on other opportunities

Says he’s not going to do it next semester, but gets addicted to that grade high

The “friends” he makes in class are usually fellow rivals and they have a hot and cold relationship that somehow works really well

When he drops the grade-chaser stuff, he’s actually really nice to be around. He has really deep, interesting conversations that are between philosophical and educational (you just have to pull his head out of his ass first)

Mammon

Some people wonder how he got into the class, some people wonder how he’s passing it

Mammon is the dude who looks like he doesn’t know about the subject but is an absolute FOUNTAIN of knowledge

Always has sunglasses on and has some kind of drink within arm’s reach. Usually a very big coffee with lots of espresso

Constant bedhead (even if he says he fixed his hair)

Tried sitting in the front row the first week, kept getting sleepy. Now sits in the back row towards the doors.

He’s either early or late. Never on time.

The one that brings a notebook and a pen to class. Nothing extra.

Usually falls asleep or cat naps. Says he learns through osmosis

This asshole is really good at auditory learning and gets by recording the lectures

Blows through exams like they’re nothing. He’s a good BS’er and gets C’s, minimum. Usually low B’s.

This guy laughs at the Type-A stresser’s and enjoys his minimum studying

Can be suckered into group studying fairly easily but most people won’t study with him because he turns study sessions into anything BUT studying

Knows people who know people. Could probably get his hands on old tests and stuff. If he can, it’ll cost you. A lot.

Levi

This poor baby has testing anxiety hella bad when it comes to subjects he’s not super interested in or that he’s already struggling in

If he likes the subject and feels confident in it, there’s no testing anxiety.

Also brings a drink to class. It’s an energy drink.

Always comes to class early and is usually in a pair of wireless headphones, browsing on his phone

A great visual learner.

His notes are written sloppily and kind of sporadically but they’re decently organized with notes in the margin and things like that

Doesn’t like asking questions out loud. Will either email the teacher, ask after class, or make a friend that isn’t afraid to ask them for him.

If he’s having a good day, he’ll try to make jokes that only make a few people laugh. It’s usually bad timing and he’s a little sad.

MUCH BETTER AT DRAGGING PEOPLE! It’s not something he thinks about. It just slips out! Before his face can overheat, he realizes people are laughing and he kind of basks in it for a while.

Has coordinated stationary; is probably animes he’s into or colors he likes

If he has a laptop, it’s absolutely smothered in stickers

The BEST guy to have a study session with. Something about being in a library or quiet area ramps up his focus and he’s like a second-hand teacher.

Very different from his in-class persona, but is often spot on with ‘If I were the teacher, I’d put this on the exam.’

Want to be friends? Comment on his merch. He’ll start a conversation if he sees a shirt/pin/bag/pencil or anything he likes. It helps if you offer Starbucks or snacks in exchange for being tutored

Satan

Takes pride in his grades but doesn’t go out of his way to make people hate him

Will casually drop his grades when asked, but won’t own up to being the top grade. Very vague (”I did okay. Just like I expected.”)

He more or less enjoys the satisfaction of seeing a good grade come back to him after all that studying

Prone to over-thinking

Probably the first one done, but he’ll do 2 or 3 look overs to check everything before turning it in

Low-key exhausts his professors with written assignments because he gives them a fucking book. It’s all technical and correct but, really, it was only supposed to be three pages!

The one that will yell at the obnoxious people interrupting lecture. Will throw things at them if they’re in reach.

Super protective of his books and class materials. Has a hoarding/scooping reflex when messy people spread out their stuff or unwrap food. The books are not to be desecrated!

If an obnoxious eater/drinker is beside him, he thinks about strangling them to the point where it distracts him from lecture

Usually reads ahead and works ahead

If he gets points off of something, he’ll want an explanation. If he feels the points were taken away unnecessarily, there will be words

If he gets too overstimulated with noises or just hits a point of being fed up, he’ll leave lecture

Rarely brings food or drink to class but can be found at the Starbucks on campus before class. Maybe after. Some days it’s both.

Best notes around. Very technical and perfectly organized. Not colorful or anything, but definitely the envy of people.

Sells his notes/study guides each semester for money

Asmo

That guy who can slide into any friend group

Socially sharp. Can tell who the most prepared are and has an instinct for who the strongest class partners will be

Makes friends with the TA’s before the professors.

Totally convinces that TA to give him hints about the upcoming exams

People either love him or hate him. Most people love him, some people hate them because they can’t be him.

Almost always has a drink and it’s rarely the same. Usually a healthy smoothie or one of the cute juice drinks from Starbucks.

The type to bring in outside food and pick at it while he listens to lecture. Tries to listen, anyways.

Really easily distracted. Gets bored with monotonous voices and HATES teachers who just read off of a powerpoint.

His notes are very colorful and aesthetic but may not be the most informative

Does his best to stay on top of assignments but usually has 2 or 3 big screw ups a semester

Somehow always gets his ass saved. Boy has good karma in stock

This is the guy that things ALWAYS seem to work out for, and they fall in his lap

Proposes cute/semi-extravagant study dates. They are rare and exclusive. Extended to a few choice people (no, it’s not to sucker anyone into giving him class notes.)

Aim’s for C’s because anything more is just a bonus. D’s and F’s are unacceptable.

Will drag a bad partner in a heartbeat. If they didn’t help in the group project, their name isn’t going on it.

Beel

Also one of the types that doesn’t look like he belongs, but he does

Is a fountain of random knowledge

Very strong memory, but not perfect. The type that needs a little push before the absolute WALL of information comes out.

Really strong test taker

Brings tons of snacks to class

Once brought a whole-ass meal to class. He ate it one-handed and took notes with the other.

The guy that somehow gets roped into favors by other people. It’s usually quick stuff and he’s good about setting boundaries to make time for himself and his studies

Want him to study with you? Mention about splitting a pizza or something.

Your hype man. Good guy to reassure you before tests if you get test anxiety

Sick and skip class? He’ll check in on you AND send copies of his notes

Doesn’t always get assignments in on time. Only late once or twice a semester. Either eats the point difference or convinces the teacher to give him an extension.

Will take you out for post-test fun errands

Belphie

Does he exist? You won’t find out until it’s time to take an exam.

Belphie does a lot of research before he signs up for a class. Would like to go 100% online but knows that isn’t realistic, so he combs teacher reviews to get nice, easygoing professors

Has a photographic memory, so all he really needs are the powerpoints and to check out reference copies of the textbooks from the libraries

Tries to take the same classes as his brothers so he can swipe the textbook for a bit

If his only option is a morning class, he DEFINITELY picks the same one as one of his bros to make sure he gets up and goes

More of a night owl

The one that’s addicted to caffeine, stays up all night, and somehow gets 7 assignments done. Has periods of intense focus then it’s back to not knowing what day it is. He just wants sleep.

Usually seen with Beel or Satan. Tends to show up at events with free food.

Loves finals week when they bring in dogs and pets.

Has wireless earbuds and is always listening to a podcast, Tedtalk, or something soothing

Catnaps through class. Even if he’s woken up from a dead sleep, he can answer whatever snarky question someone asked

Takes advantage of the meditation classes and alternative therapy walk-ins promoted by the Mental Health Clinic. He really likes guided meditation with singing bowls.

[kineticallyanywhere]

got tagged by @writingondaisies! 

How many works do you have on AO3?

14 (there’s one I should move from ff.net soon, but it’s not there now)

What’s your total AO3 word count?

270,817

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

In order of recencey... Dungeons & Daddies, RWBY, Red vs Blue, The Flash/Arrowverse, Danny Phantom, Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja, (back into ff.net days, Kim Possible, American Dragon: Jake Long, a Percy Jackson one-shot... another thing... Warriors)

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Mind over Matter (Red vs Blue)

Fourteen, and four thousand, years old (RWBY)

Flying, falling, stand your ground (RWBY)

The Way Out (Red vs Blue)

Washin’Boose (Red vs Blue) 

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I try to for long-running fics and for especially long or intense comments, but I’m usually just so nervous ;<; they all warm my heart tho, there is not one that I haven’t read more than once

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

I’m typically allergic to straight tragedy, but... I think probably Put your Stampler in a box (D&Dads), since the whole thing is a hypothetical lead-up to a magic teenager going on a rampage. Mind over Matter has a really emotional ending, but I like to think it’s more bittersweet than straight angst. Fourteen, and four thousand, years old swerves into angst, but nobody’s dying or anything so... yeah!

Do you write crossovers? If so what’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Heroes Under Drinking Age is the incomplete MASSIVE thing which is supposed to ultimately crossover Danny Phantom, RC9GN, American Dragon, and Kim Possible. I hit a hard writing wall on the ADJL and KP side and just never got over it :( I still dream of finishing it

Oh I guess there’s also a TMA-D&Dads crossover I’ve put some thought into, where after s5 Jon and Martin land in Faerun to replace The Library, and they get to decompress in this strange world, meet the Likelys, and hear about the eldritch-adjacent beings from other worlds. 

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Nope! (knocks on all the wood) at least not if you’re not counting someone pointing out spelling stuff unsolicited or stuff like that. 

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

n o p e 

when I did Demons not sold separately (D&Dads) they kiss like two times and talk about the prospect of doing more, but it doesn’t go anywhere cause there’s kids nearby. I tagged it as “ace writing allos” just in case, cause boy howdy do I not know what I’m doing in that department ^u^’

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that I know of? I wouldn’t know where to start checking for that and if it’s happened, no one’s told me about it

Have you ever had a fic translated?

only in my dreams

Washin’Boose got a pod-fic tho!! 

What’s your all time favorite ship?

I don’t ship too much and I slide around a lot when I do, but Clark KentxLois Lane 4ever

Whats a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Heroes Under Drinking Age, my beloved...

I’ve also got a number of AUs for DnDads, some with enough written that I may as well post some of the stuff as one-shots to maybe expand on later. One is a high school au where Hen (14) comes to Earth early, another is an exploration of what it might be like to be a sort of demi-god descendant of a chaos entity with the Doodler Cult coming back (called Puberty, ????, and You). Idk if Done Sons and Dragons counts, cause that’d be a whole comic. I’d love to publish something of at least one of these

And then there’s a half-baked idea for Yet Another Oscar Time Travel AU for RWBY, that would take place starting after v8 and would feature Oscar and Emerald traveling back to the series start (on purpose.)

What are your writing strengths?

I’ve gotten quite a few compliments on my prose and scene pacing! I like writing prose like it’s the thought process of the character I’m following, and I often find myself getting a bit poetic about it. I’m a big fan of parallelisms and using repetition for impact. 

I also put a lot into trying to match the original tone of the content I’m writing fic for, and have gotten quite a few compliments on my character dialogue. I just get their voices in my brain and they don’t leave. On only one occasion have they paid rent. The freeloaders. 

What are your writing weaknesses?

I bite off more than I can chew and never finish 

I worry a lot over making sure emotional beats connect, and that it doesn’t feel like I’m jumping from point A to point C, and I’m afraid that makes me over-explain point B. Like I was rereading HUDA: Alpha after I posted it to ao3, and I have a lot of grace for my high school self, but some parts of that fic could have been smoothed out quite a bit. Parts of Mind over Matter are a bit wordier than they needed to be, too. 

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I feel like it’s best done by people who are fluent in a language. Language isn’t just changing words from A to B, it comes with cultural connotations and altered meanings and layers that are only going to come across perfectly when it comes from someone who knows exactly what they’re talking about. so like if I were ever to use more than a few words or a common phrase in another language in a fic, I’d find someone who actually speaks it to help me out. 

as for how to format it... if the meaning needs to be understood by the reader, you may as just put it in the fic’s main language and alter the formatting (like with itallics) or dialogue tag to denote that they’re speaking another language. If it’s small bits, I don’t super mind footnotes at the bottom or just leaving it untranslated, like a special bit for people who speak the language or are willing to look it up. 

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

warrior cats! me, my best friend, and my older sister all had OCs and were part of RainClan, our OC clan. Their camp was made in the trunk and branches of a big willow tree that made a kind of sheltered dome. I didn’t even know what fanfiction was back then

What’s your favorite fic that you’ve written?

Mind over Matter. Hands down. For one, it’s actually done. That would put it in contest with The Way Out, which is also multi-chapter and complete, but MoM is WAY longer and took SO much more work but was SO worth it. It started as just scratching an itch and then grew into something that helped me prove to myself that I can do a long-term project, including themes and foreshadowing and narrative hootenanny and character arcs and character relationship arcs. the html coding. It was a great time, I’m so proud of it, editing it helped build one of my best friendships, and there is nothing I would trade that experience for. 

tagging @aryashi, @cinaed, @hedgiwithapen, and @glowstickia

[wickedobsessed101]

Fanfic Writer Asks

[SOURCE: criminal-minds-fanfiction: Most of the writer ask posts I come across are only like ten or so questions long so I thought I’d try to make a longer one because we like talking about our writing! Feel free to reblog!]

I’m answering all of these b/c I love Q & A’s about my writing, both for my fics and other things.

1) How old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction? It was 2013, so I was 14 years old. I’m now almost 23.

2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one? I’m mostly in the Wicked Musical fandom, but I like to read for other fandoms, like Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Chronicles of Narnia, ect.

3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer. OCs, but I’m more than willing to create an OC for someone based on characteristics they give me.

4) What is your favourite genre to write for? I love me some fluffy romance and hurt/comfort, but I also love some angsty drama.

5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi-chaptered stories, which would it be and why? OMG, don’t make me choose! They’re all my babies! I love all my children equally! They all hold special places in my heart.

6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why? Goodness, most of my stories prior to 2017, because I was in high school and had no idea what I was doing because I was just getting my feet wet with writing.

7) When is your preferred time to write? Anytime really. The latest I’ve stayed up writing a fic was 4AM. *Glares at ‘Threads of Truth’*

8) Where do you take your inspiration from? Where ever it happens to come up. I’m not picky. Movies, music, people I’ve seen on the street, random thoughts that enter my head, anything.

9) In your xxx fic, what’s your favourite scene that you wrote? In ‘Threads of Truth’, it’s a tie between Villy’s first date, and an argument that happens in an upcoming chapter. And that’s all I’m saying about that.

10) In your xxx fic, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternative ending in mind? In ‘Play The Game’, I liked the epilogue ending that I gave Elphaba with her family, even without Fiyero. I like writing her with kids. Another ending would be with the Fiyeraba still together, but I’m satisfied with the ending it has.

11) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it? I’ll go back and fix typos that are pointed out, but I don’t change plot stuff. Like, I wrote what I wrote and I will amend my technique in future stories.

12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why? Other than my OCs, because I get to fully create them and my lowkey babies, I’d have to say G(a)linda. She has so much potential and she’s so much fun.

13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why? Boq. Not because I hate him (I don’t!), but because I don’t normally know what to do with him. If he’s not with Nessa, he’s literally just standing there like a brick wall. No offence, Boq!

14) How did you come up with the title for the xxx? - You can ask about multiple stories. [Ask me about a specific story(ies)]

15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names? I usually change consonants and vowels to already existing names, or add unnecessary letters because... reasons.

16) How did you come up with the idea for xxx? [Ask me about a specific story]

17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on. “Hopefully, this will soak up any more leaks.” (Upcoming Wicked fanfic)

18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them? Yes, 2. Both of them are a few years old and I’ve grown as a writer since then. Maybe one day, I’ll edit them and repost, but not anytime soon.

19) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to? Not everything can have a sequel, y’all! XD

20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently? Yes! Around 60% of them.

21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire? @vinkunwildflowerqueen @raven-curls @mylittleelphie @weaselspeedfanfic Ultimate Queen of Cliffies

22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it? This goes back to Question #6; most of what I posted prior to 2017.

23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence? Silence. I need to focus.

24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes? I can’t write it. They’ll make out, and then be pregnant in the next chapter. Y’all can do the math for yourselves.

25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story? YES! Yes, I have! Both sad tears and tears of joy. I’ve also cringed from second-hand embarrassment at the things the characters do and say. I’m not in control of their actions all the time. Sometimes they tell me what they’re gonna do, and I’m like, “Well, alright, then.”

26) Which part of your xxx fic was the hardest to write? [Ask me about a specific story]

27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow? I write bullet points of things I want to happen in a chapter on the Word Doc, or in the story as a whole, and I try to keep those bullet points in order. And the Notes App on my phone holds a lot of my ideas, and sometimes full scenes.

28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction? That I’d become obsessed with writing and continue doing it for almost ten years, as well as expanding to writing plays and musicals.

29) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like? Yeah. I’m not gonna say which one, but just know there’s one... or a few.

30) In contrast to 29 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at? Yes, and I’m still not gonna say which one(s). I want all the love!

31) Send me a fic recommendation and I’ll post it for my followers to see! (The asker is to send the rec, not the answerer) Yeah, sure!

32) Are any of your characters based on real people? Yes. Villy Doiir from ‘Threads of Truth’ is based on 4 people I know in real life, all mixed together into one wholesome, mother figure/ mentor. Perhaps that’s why I like writing her so much.

33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten? All reviews keep me going, no matter the length. But I love it when people review saying that they picked up on little references that were really just for me. It makes me feel like we’ve shared a moment.

34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten? A guest reviewer once said, “You tend to write Fiyero as an abusive person”. It wasn’t harsh, just... NOT TRUE. Especially for the story they were reviewing.

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest? Close to my chest. I’ll share it with the world when I’m ready.

36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s? NOPE! You’ll just have to wait and see! LOL!

37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written? I... really don’t know. My stories all have their funny moments.

38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it. I’m very busy, and collabs aren’t really my thing, but I’m always willing to lend an extra pair of eyes pre-posting.

39) Do you prefer first, second or third person? I’ve written one story in the first person and it was fun to get into the character’s head, but I love third person, cause I like knowing what everyone is thinking. Second person makes me feel a certain way and that don’t really like.

40) Do people know you write fanfiction? IRL, no. It’s not something I bring up over dinner. I’ll talk about my plays and musicals, but not fanfiction. I like keeping my fics for the online peeps and my more personal writings for the RL peeps.

41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written? My OC, Princess Hannalyn, from ‘A Royal Romance’. She was so much fun!

42) Song fic - What made you decide to use the song xxx for xxx. I haven’t done a song fic.

43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it? Not fully, but they’ve had little inklings, but certain details were still a surprise. And I’m not mad about it.

44) What is the last line you wrote? “I don’t want this to be the last time we see each other.”

45) What spurs you on during the writing process? When I’ll have one idea, and it spirals into many others, and when the characters write themselves. It makes it so much easier for me. Sometimes they tell me that they’re about to make a bad decision, and I just go along with it. They need to learn and grow somehow.

46) I really loved your xxx fic. If you were ever to do a sequel, what do you think might happen in it? [Ask me for a specific story]

47) Here’s a fic title - insert a made up title. What would this story be about? [Ask me]

48) What’s your favourite trope to write? I love a good Royalty AU (not fully AU ‘cause of our princey-prince, but still) and Holiday AUs. And I’ve never written a Coffeeshop AU, but I LOVE reading them. I’ll read anything. I’m not picky, and I love to see what ideas others have.

49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about? Yes, and both of them were Gelphies: 1 - “Easier Said Than Done” by mecelphie - It’s part of a long, wonderful series of Elphaba and Glinda together at Shiz and how their lives evolve together and has many lovable OCs. 2 - “The Thropp Diaries” by denpa wave chick saki - It’s first-person Elphaba POV of the book. It expands on lots of mentioned moments and we get to journey through Elphaba’s thoughts.

50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why? I’d have to say fluff, so I can get my escape from reality. But it’s hard to write pure fluff without a little bit of conflict.

If you wanna read my stories, they’re all right here: Fae’sFlower

[theyearoftheking]

Book Eighty-One: Billy Summers

“Maybe a chilly story needs a chilly writing room, he thinks. It’s as good an explanation as any, since the whole process is a mystery to him, anyway.” 

Well hello there, Constant Readers! Have you missed me and my half-assed reviews of Steve books? 

Crickets. 

I know I’ve promised book reviews, television recaps... all the things. But I’m kind of busy living and enjoying life at the moment, without the need to take notes or screen grabs. That being said, I really did enjoy Billy Summers, and it took me almost a hundred pages to remember how this blogging thing worked. I was supposed to take notes? Dark Tower references? DePere, Wisconsin? Should I remember that for some reason? But don’t worry, it was like riding a bike. This blog is full of all the stuff you’ve come to know and love, as well as SPOILERS!!! So, if you have not finished the book yet, stop reading and come back once you’ve turned the last page.

SPOILERS!!! Consider yourselves adequately warned. 

Billy Summers doesn’t really include anything supernatural, and it’s more suspenseful and plot driven than some of Steve’s other books. In other words, it’s another great recommendation for people who don’t claim they don’t like Stephen King. 

Billy is an assassin who has mastered the art of “dumb like a fox”. 

He’s hired for a new assignment, but something seems off. Billy has been in the assassin game long enough to know when something is foul in the state of Denmark. He doesn’t trust the people who hired him, and he has the distinct impression he’s going to end up as the patsy in the end. But, he plays along as Dave Lockridge, single man and writer. He moves onto a charming street in Midwood (I kept reading this as Midworld... thanks, Steve), makes friends with all the neighbors, and beats all the neighborhood kids at Monopoly on the weekends. This part of the book was so tender, it reminded me a lot of Ted Brautigan and the kids from Hearts in Atlantis. Of all the things Billy later regrets, it’s letting these kids down, and having them trust him when he was obviously so untrustworthy. 

During the day, Billy writes  at his office in Gerald Tower. There’s always a tower, isn’t there? And this tower takes on more significance, because it’s the spot from which Billy is supposed to shoot Joel Allen. Joel is due to be transferred to Midwood, and marched up the steps of the courthouse just like in The Outsider. Constant Readers remember how well that worked out... 

Billy has an assassins creed: he only shoots bad guys. On the scale of bad guys, Joel Allen isn’t quite Ted Bundy, but he’s not Mr. Rodgers either. He had something of a “me too” moment when he accidentally mistook a feminist writer for a sex worker; and there was a gun fight outside of a poker game. It’s enough for Billy to work with. 

Billy is waiting for Joel to be transferred to the Midworld Midwood county lock-up; and he bides his time by actually doing some writing. He covers his tragic childhood (his mom worked in a laundry facility, just like Steve’s mom), and his time in the military. This is where Steve really shines. Billy’s book is written in a childish tone that just WORKS. It’s exactly what you’d expect from a simple-minded assassin. But still waters, friends. As the story goes on, Billy’s voice grows and improves. Well done, Steve, it’s like two books for the price of one.

In between writing, Billy assumes another fake identity (Dalton Smith), and secures a bolt hole to hide out in once his job is complete. Believe it or not, the murder of Joel Allen is such an insignificant part of the book. Billy successfully takes him out, and makes it to his bolt hole undetected. And this is really where the second part of the book starts. 

One rainy night, Billy hears random noises outside his apartment. He looks out the window in time to see a van full of guys dump a female body into a gutter. Billy should have just anonymously called the police... but if he had done that, we wouldn’t have a story. Instead, Billy goes full on Captain Save A Ho, and pulls the young woman from the gutter. It’s clear she had been drugged and assaulted, and she manages to puke all over Billy’s place. 

Neat. 

When Alice wakes up in the morning, she recognizes Billy from the police sketches, but promises not to rat him out for the Joel Allen murder. They form an unlikely friendship that includes watering the neighbor’s plants, watching Blacklist, and Alice reading Billy’s book. Basically, they were sheltering in place before that was even a thing; something Steve jokes about. Eventually, Billy knows he needs to get the rest of his money for the Joel Allen hit, and punish the guys who raped Alice. 

Y’all. I’m still having nightmares over the most creative use of a hand mixer I have ever read. I thought the can-opener in Lisey’s Story was bad... this was worse. But the kind of worse you feel good about, if that makes sense. 

After finding out the name of the guy behind the Joel Allen hit, killing a few bad dudes, and pissing off a bitch named Marge (fucking Marge if you’re nasty), Billy and Alice hunker down in Colorado with Billy’s assassin booking agent, Bucky. 

As soon as Billy and Alice entered Colorado and the town of Sidewinder was mentioned, I knew where we were headed. Yeah buddy, Overlook time! 

Billy takes to writing in a little shack behind Bucky’s house, and inside the shack is a Polaroid picture of the topiary animals at the Overlook. Every time Billy looks at the picture, the animals seem to have shifted. It gives him a cold sense of dread. 

There’s a certain parallel I picked up on in Colorado: Jack Torrance and Billy Summers are both haunted men running away from things. The Overlook was where Jack went to dry out, and work on his writing. He wanted to work on his marriage, and become a better father to Danny. We all know he failed spectacularly. Then, we’ve got Billy. Billy actually gets writing accomplished, and becomes an unlikely father-figure to Alice. Despite having just as much, if not more baggage than Jack, Billy doesn’t let it define him. He acknowledges it, and moves past it. It’s almost like Billy accomplishes what Jack couldn’t. And it took the Overlook burning to the ground for that to happen. 

While we’re on the topic of Billy and Alice, one of the things I love about Steve’s characters is he never forces romance where there doesn’t need to be any. While Billy acknowledges the age gap between him and Alice, nothing untoward ever happens between them. There’s obvious love, but never the romantic kind. Steve is one of the few contemporary writers to get this right. 

The story ends with Billy killing the guy behind Joel’s hit, getting shot by Marge as he leaves the crime scene (fucking Marge), Alice nursing him back to health, and getting him back to Colorado where they all live happily ever after.

I wish.

I wish I had stopped reading twenty-three pages before the book ended, because the actual end was more realistic, but heartbreaking. In reality, fucking Marge shot Billy in the stomach, and he died of an infection in the back of a Walmart parking lot. Fucking Marge indeed. But this was the way the book should have ended. Needed to end. Anything else would have been unrealistic. But damn, I hated to see Billy go out like that. 

There was one Wisconsin reference: after Billy kills Joel Allen, he’s supposed to be transferred to a safe house in De Pere. You know... where Steve lived when he was in a kid.

Other than Gerald Tower, we were also graced with “the world has moved on-” just to remind us that we all follow The Beam. 

Total Wisconsin Mentions: 49

Total Dark Tower References: 78

Book Grade: A+

Rebecca’s Definitive Ranking of Stephen King Books

Doctor Sleep: A+

The Talisman: A+

Wizard and Glass: A+

11/22/63: A+

Mr. Mercedes: A+

Billy Summers: A+

End of Watch: A+

Under the Dome: A+

Needful Things: A+

On Writing: A+

The Green Mile: A+

Hearts in Atlantis: A+

Full Dark, No Stars: A+

The Outsider: A+

The Bazaar of Bad Dreams: A+

If It Bleeds: A+

Just After Sunset: A+

Rose Madder: A+

Misery: A+

Different Seasons: A+

It: A+

Four Past Midnight: A+

Stephen King Goes to the Movies: A+

The Shining: A-

The Stand: A-

Finders Keepers: A-

Bag of Bones: A-

Duma Key: A-

Black House: A-

The Institute: A-

The Wastelands: A-

The Drawing of the Three: A-

The Dark Tower: A-

Dolores Claiborne: A-

Blaze: B+

Hard Listening: B+

Revival: B+

Nightmares in the Sky: B+

The Dark Half: B+

Joyland: B+

Skeleton Crew: B+

The Dead Zone: B+

Nightmares & Dreamscapes: B+

Wolves of the Calla: B+

‘Salem’s Lot: B+

Song of Susannah: B+

Carrie: B+

Creepshow: B+

Later: B+

From a Buick 8: B

The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon: B

Sleeping Beauties: B-

The Colorado Kid: B-

Storm of the Century: B-

Everything’s Eventual: B-

Cycle of the Werewolf: B-

The Wind Through the Keyhole: B-

Danse Macabre: B-

The Running Man: C+

Cell: C+

Thinner: C+

Dark Visions: C+

The Eyes of the Dragon: C+

The Long Walk: C+

The Gunslinger: C+

Pet Sematary: C+

Firestarter: C+

Rage: C

Desperation: C-

Insomnia: C-

Cujo: C-

Nightshift: C-

Faithful: D

Gerald’s Game: D

Roadwork: D

Lisey’s Story: D

Christine: D

Dreamcatcher: D

The Regulators: D

The Tommyknockers D

I’m not going to end this with any promises of upcoming posts. That way when I do randomly stumble on here one afternoon, it will be a delight for us all.

Until next time, Long Days & Pleasant Nights,

Rebecca

[pies-writes-and-more]

boardroom fantasies

Word Count: 3, 552

Pairing: Fem!Reader x Steve Rogers

MASSIVE CONGRATULATIONS TO MY FRIEND @kayteewritessteve !!!!! This was written as a part of her 1000 Follower Prompt Challenge ! Please go give her a shoutout or give her works a read (they’re amazing!)

Warnings: Okay listen, I’ve never written smut before but hey, these days we’re supposed to be trying new things right? ANYWAYS so this is clearly very 18+ NSFW. Reader is assumed to be of legal age.

KINKS: Dominant Steve is always my fave, oof. Pet names, sex is a (semi?) public area, and probs some other stuff but I’m already all flustered knowing I’m gonna post this P U B L I C L Y so forgive me lol  

(not my gif but damn does that look just kill me, credits to the original owner!!)

It wasn’t that she was wearing anything different today. She was always wearing something nice and Steve had seen her in that tight fitting skirt a million times.

It wasn’t her makeup either, she always worn that ‘just-kissed’ shade of pink lipstick, and her hair was always done up in that messy bun when she was trying to concentrate at work.

Steve couldn’t quite put his finger on it but there was something about her today that was like a giant billboard screaming “FUCK ME”. He shifted uncomfortably in his office, tugging slightly on his pants to relieve some of the pressure of his semi-hard cock.

“Hey Steve, everyone’s leaving a bit early for some drinks. You know, some relaxation and bonding, you wanna join?” Sam asked, leaning against the doorframe of the Captain’s office.

Steve thought for a moment and glanced in (Y/N)’s direction, noting that same young guy from accounting that always seemed to be near her, grinning that same cheeky smile and probably saying the same disgusting terrible lines.

“I’ll join in a bit. Just gotta finish some paperwork. Do you mind sending (Y/N) in here? I think I might need her help with some of this,” Steve said, scrunching up his face in fake confusion, something that Sam was all too familiar with.

Sam laughed and nodded, “What, Google got you confused again, old man?” He teased. “Fine, just as long as you don’t ask me. I dunno if I can explain everything as patiently as (Y/N) does,” he grinned, leaving the doorway to grab her.

Steve smirked to himself as Sam interrupted Accounting Dude’s egotistical manner. The three of them near (Y/N)’s desk glanced in Steve’s direction and Steve could’ve sworn he saw the Accounting Guy roll his eyes. (Y/N) nodded to Sam and waved a smile to the rest of them, heading over to Steve while everyone else seemed to be heading the opposite way to the elevators.

“Need some help there, Cap’n?” (Y/N) asked cheerfully.

Maybe it was just the happiness in her eyes, or the innocent work-friendly tone in her voice, but Steve Rogers would be lying if he said he didn’t immediately think about how nice that face would be under his desk right now.

He quickly cleared his throat, shaking his head awkwardly, “Uh yeah. I was hoping to get you to help me with the uh- you know the thing that’s gotta be presented…” his voice trailed off. Fuck, he thought to himself awkwardly, staring at the screen so he didn’t have to look at her cute smile, should’ve thought of something to ask before she came.

“I mean if it’s a presentation, then it should be in the boardroom hm?” (Y/N) asked him. Steve looked up at her in surprise, wondering why she was going along with such an obvious lie. “Pretty sure it’s been open for hours and if everyone else is gone for drinks, we could have it all to ourselves for however long we want.”

There was a sultriness to her voice. Like a temptress, she lured him out of his office and into the boardroom with nothing but a few words. Steve was like putty in her hands. God her hands, he thought to himself as she walked into the boardroom in front of him. What I’d give to just see her holding my cock in her hands.

Steve tried to tear the inappropriate thoughts out of his mind, knowing that if he kept going, he was bound to become noticeably horny. At least right now, it was concealed, but if his mind kept fantasizing the way that it did…

“Steve?”

Her voice was like music to his ears. He blinked as he looked at her, biting his lip slightly as he realized they were already in the boardroom.

“Something on your mind?” She asked innocently. Her lashes batted a little too innocently. She had to be thinking the same thing as him, didn’t she? There was no way she wasn’t just putting this whole innocent and sexy vibe as an act.

“(Y/N)…I uh… something going on between you and…” Steve waved in the direction of her desk, trying desperately to remember the Accounting Guy’s real name.

She giggled, sitting up on the boardroom table. God that skirt. Steve wanted to pull down her tights and just fuck her right there, skirt on and everything. He loved the way it held onto her body, the way that she seemed to be so confident in it. “Eric?” She filled in for him, smiling. “He’s… a little too pushy for me.” She admitted, tilting her head slightly to look up at the Captain.

“Oh,” was all Steve said. So she didn’t like pushy. That’s fine, Steve didn’t have to be dominant in bed, I mean he’d be fine not being slightly aggressive- wait what was he thinking? This wasn’t even about being in bed-

“I mean, I like pushy, sure,” (Y/N) interrupted his thoughts, smirking up at him. “But… I prefer it in a more….intimate setting.” For a moment, Steve had to remind himself that she wasn’t a mind reader. He shifted in his stance for a moment, glancing at the door which somehow already seemed closed… and locked… had she locked it when they came in here?

“(Y/N)-” he started.

“I wanna be fucked, Captain.”

The words hit him like a truck. Steve was sure he was hearing things. He blinked in surprise, staring at him, “S-Sorry?”

(Y/N) batted her lashes again, leaning forward slightly so Steve could see over the collar of her shirt. “I. Wanna be. Fucked.” She stated slowly, her voice having that same sultry tone that got Steve here in the first place. “Isn’t that why you called me in here?” She asked, an innocent giggle leaving her lips. “Haven’t you been thinking about me?”

Steve needed fresh air, or a smack in the face. He couldn’t decide which. Was he actually fantasizing this was or was this actually happening?

“Sorry, did I read the situation wrong?” (Y/N) asked after a moment, looking almost horrified. “I-I’m sorry, Steve, I just thought… I mean there’s been so much sexual tension between us but I mean I guess that could all just be in my head?”

She started to get off the boardroom table and Steve quickly found himself standing between her legs, holding her wrists down to the table so she couldn’t move. “You didn’t read anything wrong. Just… say it again for me.” He said lowly, feeling his more dominant self arising.

“Say what-”

“Say it. Again.”

(Y/N) blinked up at him innocently, leaning forward again so her chest was pressed against his. “I wanna be fucked,” she whispered with a smirk.

Steve grinned at her and pressed a quick kiss to her nose, unable to help himself. Not only was she absolutely sinfully sexy, she was also incredibly adorable. “Alright then, come on-” Steve started to move towards the door.

“Where are you going?” (Y/N) asked, not having moved from the table. Steve looked back at her, her eyebrow raised in confusion.

Steve looked at her in shock, blinking between her and the table she was seated on. “Really? You wanna have sex….here? Now?” Steve asked, surprised. He glanced up at the corners of the room, confirming his previous knowledge that there were no cameras in this boardroom. “Are you sure?”

“Please?” She whined in a submissive tone. Her hand led up to her collar, playing with the top button on her white shirt.

“You better take that hand off,” he growled, eyes darkening. (Y/N) giggled and moved her hand away from her shirt, but not before she unbuttoned the first button.

“Are you trying to get yourself punished, little miss?” Steve asked her, walking back to her and gripping her knees a little tight.

(Y/N) bit her lip as she looked up at the domineering man, shifting slightly. “N-No Sir.” She whispered slightly, smiling but shifting under his stance.

“That’s what I thought.” Steve chuckled, tilting her head up and crashing his lips down to hers.

The undressing happened a lot quicker than Steve had fantasized (and he had fantasized a lot). Her heels were tossed onto the floor, her tights were quickly ripped off her legs and Steve pulled tightly on her shirt, ripping buttons off.

“Steve!” She pouted, looking at her ripped shirt.

“I’ll buy you a new one,” he growled into her ear, peppering kisses down her throat.

Her moans were soft at first as he grinded his hips into hers. Steve held onto her legs tightly, pulling her up close to his own body as he gently laid her back onto the table.

“W-What’re you doing?” (Y/N) asked. Her voice was shy now, watching as he kneeled down on the floor, head between her legs.

“Stay still,” was all he said. Steve couldn’t help but smirk at the red thong he found under her skirt. He pushed the skirt’s fabric up onto her hips as far as he could and used a finger to slowly tear the now wet fabric of her underwear from her skin.

“Steve…” (Y/N) murmured, shifting slightly as she felt her thong move.

“Don’t. Move.” Steve ordered lowly and she immediately froze. He chuckled to himself, so she was a good girl after all. He pulled her thong annoyingly slow down to her ankles, watching as her whole body shook in an attempt not to move. “Now, what do we say when we want something, pet?” He asked her teasingly.

“P-Please,” she whispered.

“Can’t hear you,” he grinned, leaning closer to her warmth. He took a breath in, inhaling her scent. He could still smell that body soap she used, the one that he always tried to get an extra whiff of.

“P-Please- oh fuck!” she yelped. As soon as the please had left her lips, Steve latched his lips onto her clit. His tongue flicked up and down along the nub, teasing it endlessly. “S-Steve! S-Slow down!” She whined, only to be met with him speeding up. Her back arched in response as his index finger gently touched her entrance.

(Y/N) had almost forgotten where she was, lying there on the Avengers’ boardroom table. She tried to grip the smooth surface with her fingers, long moans being drawn out from her throat. She had to shut her eyes quick, the mere look of Steve between her legs shortening the distance to her orgasm.

“Pretty little thing,” Steve hummed as he let go of her clit after a while, letting his thumb circle it instead. He gently coaxed his index finger into her sopping wetness, smirking as he watched her try not to thrash around. “Teasing me all day endlessly. Making me horny all the goddamn time.”

“I-I’m sorry, Sir,” she quickly apologized, shaking still. “P-Please please please please,” she begged, looking down at him earnestly.

“Please what, darling?” Steve teased with a laugh, sliding his finger slowly in and out of her. The sounds leaving her lips were better than he could’ve ever imagined.

(Y/N) whined, but couldn’t deny how much she loved this playful and dominant Steve. His finger was slick with her wetness, dripping down to the palm of her hand, the sound of him finger-fucking her filling the room. “I-I want your cock, Steve, please.”

He scoffed playfully, adding a second finger and making her squirm more. “Not yet. I need you to cum for me, darling. I want to be able to fuck you with all your juices on me.” His voice was so much deeper than it usually was. (Y/N) felt every syllable that left his lips send shivers down her spine.

Steve was proud to know that she was enjoying herself. He slowly let his fingers curl, searching for that patch of skin that just felt slightly different.

Wasn’t too long before he found it. She let him know quicker than he realized he had rubbed it. A long whine left her throat, her head hitting the table with an echoing sound as her back arched.

“Don’t hurt yourself, pet,” he smirked, rubbing her spot ever so slowly. “Do you like that? Is that what you want during work every day? To come into my office and sit on my lap, have my fingers in you whenever you want, Princess?”

The nicknames were all too much. (Y/N) had fantasized all too much about Steve holding her hair in his hand while she sucked him off, praising his good little girl. She got herself off too many nights to the thought of what was happening right this moment, and she was loving every second of it.

Although he had asked her to stay still, he couldn’t help but enjoy the sight of her wriggling. “Come on, darling, ride my fingers hm?” He whispered, helping her to a halfway seated position.

(Y/N) looked at him, almost dazed, but quickly snapped out of it. She smirked at him and nodded innocently, holding onto his arm as she positioned herself in a comfortable seat on his hand. Her hips swayed along his palm, eyes rolling back everytime she pushed her clit along the heel his hand. “S-Steve,” she mewed loudly.

The Captain bit down on his lip, quickly releasing his hard-on from his pants and stroking it slowly as she rode his fingers. He followed her rhythm, groaning quietly to himself as he took in the sight. It was much better than anything he had dreamt of, anything he had thought of. It wasn’t long before her body started to clench down on his hand, her whines and moans getting higher and louder.

Steve “Cum for me baby, pretty please,” he taunted into her ear, grunting softly as he  imagined what it was going to feel like, with his cock buried deep inside her. He let his hand leave his shaft for a moment, helping his other hand and flicking at her clit with his thumb as she rode his fingers. He slid the slick juices onto his cock, wincing at just how nice it felt. It was almost too good to be true.

Her climax was made very evident by the loud “FUCK” that left her lips. Her hips rocked back and forth over his hand as she rode out her orgasm, whining and clutching at his wrist. His arm was getting a tad sore at this point but Steve waved the discomfort away. He was going to fuck her here and now and he wouldn’t let his own hand get in the way.

Steve wanted to give her a moment, let her recover from what seemed like a pretty good orgasm (his hand under her was almost completely covered and there was absolutely a small bit that had leaked onto the table) but (Y/N)’s eyes flickered to his cock in his hands. She looked up at him with pleading eyes, lips parting but no words came out.

“What is it darling?” he crooned playfully. “Are you all done?”

(Y/N)’s lips formed a pout, giving him a glare. “Goddammit, Steve, fuck me!” She huffed.

Steve’s eyes went darker, grabbing her hair and tugging her back to half lying down on the table. “Too rough?” he asked quickly and she immediately shook her head.

“I like it when you pull my hair,” she purred, making Steve’s lips form a smile. He pulled her waist so her ass was hanging off the table, meeting perfectly at the height where he wanted her.

Steve kissed her quickly and harshly, their tongues meeting eagerly as he pressed the tip of his cock to her soaking wet entrance. “Please,” she begged between kisses. And he complied.

Steve slid in her smoothly with her past orgasm aiding his entry, groaning into her ear as he used an arm behind her for stability, the other hand gripping her side. “God I’ve wanted you for so long,” he grumbled into her hair, biting at her neck as he moved into her further. He waited here for a moment, letting her shift to get comfortable.

It wasn’t until she smirked up at him that he realized that she wasn’t shifting to get comfortable. He kept sighing and moaning with every move she made. She was teasing him, toying with him.

“Evil,” he laughed, kissing her again as he swiftly pulled almost fully out of her. He let her start a sentence before quickly slamming back into her, letting her scream his name into the empty office.

Steve let his hips pound her into the table, her hips lifting up to meet him almost every time. Their grunts and groans echoed in the boardroom and Steve was almost high on the sound. His body pushed into her more as she scratched as his back, squealing her way into another orgasm. “Go-God,” he groaned, tilting his head back as he felt her squeeze him, his cock shaking and begging for release.

He couldn’t let it end so soon. He had wanted this for far too long. She let out a frustrated groan when he pulled out of her, making his lips turn into a smile.

“On your feet. And turn around,” Steve whispered to her in a growl. He pulled her closer to the edge of the table, helping her to her feet. She wobbled for a moment, eager to get back to it and yet still swaying from the magic of it all. She turned in his grip, facing the table and quickly pushed her skirt off, glancing back to make sure his eyes were exactly where she wanted them.

And they were. What a sight. Steve had to almost force himself to stop staring. God, he couldn’t imagine being in this boardroom again, going through a meeting, without constantly thinking about her, ass out and facing him, begging to be fucked.

“Good girl,” he managed to get out, straightening his back as he adjusted his stance. His fingers coiled into her hair, giving a quick and playful tug just to make her whine again. “Louder this time, (Y/N),” he told her in a dangerous tone. “I want to hear you louder.”

It wasn’t hard to do. (Y/N) was going to answer with a simple, “Yes sir,” but Steve interrupted it like he had been doing this whole time. His cock slammed up into her all too easy with how wet she was, making her yelp. She wanted to lean into the table more, give her something to collapse onto, but his grip on her hair was tight. He pulled her hair just a little more, keeping her with her chin up as he fucked her harder. Faster.

She wanted to scream for him, she wanted to be louder. (Y/N) couldn’t tell if she was just going deaf with how loud they were or if she was just in such a state of bliss, she just couldn’t hear anything.

“Y-You’re gonna make me cum too quick,” Steve grunted, slamming into her again and not failing to hit that sweet spot that he had been teasing earlier.

“Steveeeee!” (Y/N) whined as he went slower, obviously trying to calm himself down.

Steve groaned out her name in a chant, as if it become the only word he knew. “Fuck,” he grumbled, leaning his forehead into her shoulder for a moment, caressing that perfect ass of hers. “I just don’t want it to end,” he told her, pushing deeper into her, slower and slower, just to annoy her.

“Cum, Steve, please,” (Y/N) finally begged. “I want you to cum on me so we have a reason to go take a shower.” She glanced back at him, that same innocent and yet so naughty look in her eye. “Don’t you want to fuck me in the shower, Steve?”

He didn’t need any other kind of permission. His cock swelled more in her and Steve continued to pound her hard, faster than he had before. After a moment, (Y/N) felt him tense behind her and he let out a loud groan. She was almost sad when he pulled out, half wanting to feel how his cum felt sliding down her leg. But he flipped her over quicker than she could voice it, his cock twitching in front of her as he came all over her front.

There was a moment of silence as the two caught their breath, (Y/N) slumping into the table. Steve held his cock in his hands, still sighing happily as it twitched in the open air. He watched as she locked eyes with him, dipping her fingers into the mess he had made on her and before he could realize what she was doing, she licked it slowly off her fingers.

“You’re going to pay for all this teasing,” Steve groaned, imagining what her tongue would feel like on his sensitive cock.

“Shower. Now.” (Y/N) demanded with a sinful grin. The two tried to clumsily grab their things, giggling like young kids as they made their way back to Steve’s room in the tower. He couldn’t help but think about the numerous places they could sneak off to during their work week.

He wanted to fuck her everywhere, in any way she wanted. There was nothing more that Steve Rogers needed than her screaming his name over and over again.

** ** ** ** ** ** **

As this is my first smut fic, it would mean the world to me if you guys let me know if you liked it! Thanks so much to @kayteewritessteve who helped me edit this and gave me the confidence to post it! Again, this was for her 1000 Follower Celebration so congratulations again, Kaytee!!!!! <3 

AVENGERS MASTERLIST | MASTERLIST

Taglist (Let me know if you’d like to join!): @kayteewritessteve @kniveouts @steveeologyy @lil-stark @angryteapot @aletteredaffair @littlemarvelfics @skizzlewonderland @choiluana @neoqueen306 @m-a-t-91 @officialmarvelwhore @fandom-hoe101 @blueswedebeatbox @nubivagantdreaming @kahlanmars @geek-and-proud @carostar2020 @evanstush @infinitycaprogers @omlbarnes @nixphomaniac @rinymichelle321 @farfromjustordinary @bubbabarnes @purplekitten30 @songforhema @afellowmidnightwarrior @mrspeacem1nusone @coonflix @mina-minabobina @to-write-ornah​

[kriffingunlucky]

Could pleeassseee do a scared reader request with like the 501st (whoever you want) where the reader is like scared to go back to her house or quarters or something b/c someone broke in or something(?) and she wants them to like do a walk through to make sure it’s safe. Bonus if like they stay over to keep watch and make her feel extra safe. Also, you’re writing is sooo goood I would wait a year to read your stuff tbh☺️😍

A/N: Ahh! Thank you, darling! That’s too sweet of you. You might actually have to wait a year at the pace I’m spitting out fanfics heh. Oops. Sorry!

This is such a cute idea though! So I’ll do it for sure. :)

---------

Strolling down the hallways of the old base that the Republic just gained back, your eyes dart carefully around. Scanning the ceiling and ventilation shafts. You could swear you heard something up there. Nervously playing with your fingers, you step as quietly as you could, so if any noises were made you’d know and be able to react. Not that you’d know what to do.

After paranoidly stalking your way towards your quarters, you jumped a mile high when the door you were standing beside slides open. Eyes wide and body shaking, you creep towards the opening. Peeking your head in, the darkness giving you chills.

But there was nothing inside.

“What are you doing?”

You yell, startled, turning around and covering your face with your arms. Terror on your face. But after you weren’t attacked and the person starts laughing softly, you uncovered your face to look at the suspect.

“Oh, Fives. Hi.”

“What were you lookin’ for?” The man smiles, trying to stifle his laughter. But failing. “Ghosts?”

“No!” You defend yourself, voice cracking. “I was just, seeing who opened it. Yeah.”

Fives nods slowly, entertainment on his face. “M’kay, love. Whatever you say.”

You open your mouth to protest but you hear another voice call out, also making you jump. Leaping behind the ARC in front of you, you move his arm to peek out from behind him.

It was just Echo approaching.

“What took you so long? You said you were just going to see what that noise was.” Echo crosses his arms, inspecting his closest vod.

“SO YOU HEARD IT TOO!” You shout, shoving your head between Fives’ arm and side, making him look down and move his arm slightly. Not stepping out from behind him, though, you look at Echo.

Realization sets in on his face.

She’s what kept him, duh. What other than girls could distract Fives? Echo shakes his head side to side with a smile, raising an eyebrow at you.

“I did hear it. Can’t decide what it sounds like though.” He laughs.

Frowning, you mummer lowly, like it was a secret. “I’ve heard some guys talking about ghosts haunting this place.”

Echo sighs, “That’s silly-”

“I believe it!” Fives declares, throwing his hands dramatically around. “I set my bucket down as me n’ Echo were eating our rations, but when I turned back to where I know fur’sure I left it. It was gone!”

“Fives, that’s because you misplaced it.” Echo interjects, looking unamused.

“Spooky.” The goateed man whispers down towards you, something in his eyes. Ignoring what his friend had said, like he totally didn’t just ruin his story.

“I kept hearing things in the ceiling and art ducts, it was scary.” You swallow, looking down at your feet. Suddenly worried about what they’d think of you. It wasn’t stupid that you were afraid, right? “I didn’t like walking alone. That’s why you scared me so much when you walked up, Fives.”

The clone frowns in response, “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I didn’t know.”

You mumble an ‘it’s okay’ under your breath and try to not look as tense as you were, but fail. Your body was painfully stiff as you flinch at the noise you hear again.

“We’re almost done with our rounds, and heading in the same direction as your quarters anyways, so maybe we could assist you. Would you mind if we walked you the rest of the way?” Echo offers, tilting his head.

You look up, guilt written all over your face. Eyes wide. “No, no you don’t ha-”

“(Y/n). It’s not an inconvenience, so don’t even start on that.” Fives shoots you a reassuring grin, holding his hand out to you. “It’d be our pleasure.”

Swallowing down the lump in your throat, you nod. Smiling at the both of them and take his hand. Finishing their rounds with them. You chatted about the most random things, being friendly and joking around, picking on each other. They both helped you forget how afraid you were before, feeling safe walking between them, holding Fives’ hand.

But the three of you arrive at your room.

“Here we are! Glad we could walk ya! I enjoyed talkin’.” Fives laughs, letting go of your hand as you unlock your door.

You chuckle, agreeing with him as you walk in, turning around with a smile. “Yes, thank you both! I’ll see you around.”

Fives and Echo both say their goodbyes, strolling down the hallways back to the barracks for the shift change.

You inspected your room, not being scared at first, but it set in later. The base had barely any lights, and most of them weren’t even working. The metal walls seeming closer then they really are. The shadows shifting around in the room, never letting you set your eyes on them. Your breath hitches in your throat as tears form in the corners of your eyes. You realize;

you’re terrified.

In a fit of panic you open the door again and yell for your ARC friends, voice shaking violently. “Come back! Please don’t leave me!!”

Tears stream down your face as you cry, terrified as it felt like the darkness followed you down the halls, as your feet carried you in the direction they walked off in. You couldn’t stop yourself from going, and once you were, you didn’t want to stop. Closing your eyes as you turn the corner, you wanted everything to just stop.

You ram into a hard, but movable, wall. Not exactly what you were thinking but it worked well enough for you. Falling onto your butt, you continue to sob, curling into a ball. Whispering things out of worry. You didn’t open your eyes, because you knew that if you did whatever was chasing you would be in front of you.

“(Y/n)?”

Echo’s voice finally broke through your fit of panic, his warm hand on the side of your face. You didn’t know how long he’d been trying to talk to you, but you tried to quiet down, listening to what he was saying.

“Take big breaths, okay? In and out. Open your eyes. I’m right here. I won’t hurt you. I promise.”

Breathing deeply you slowly peek your eyes open, met by his deep brown ones, clouded with worry. Throwing yourself over him in a hug you try to keep your breathing steady.

“Now, what happene-”

“Please stay with me.” You whisper into his neck, voice shaking.

Echo looks up at Fives, and they share a glance, but decide on what to do.

“Okay.” He responds, standing up with you in his arms. “Lets go back and get you in bed.”

Fives walks behind Echo, a soft smile on his features as he looks at you. He really did love you, wanting to keep you safe was at the top of his list. So making sure that if you decided to open your beautiful (e/c) eyes again, he would be there. To reassure you that you’re safe.

Entering your room, the door opening with a woosh, you were lowered down to be set on the small bed. But you don’t release the clone from your grasp.

Echo sighs, speaking to you gently. “You have to let go of me so I can remove some of my armor, it’d be uncomfortable to sleep in. Trust me. I’ll climb into the bed with you as soon as I’m done, alright?”

Slowly nodding, you move your arms from around his neck. Nervously shifting on the bed. Whispering, “Sorry.”

Fives was out of the top half of his armor first, so he scoots into the bed with you, his back pressed against the wall as he pats beside him. “It’s fine, love. C’mere.”

Doing as you were told, you scoot closer. Curling into Fives’ large chest with some hesitance. He wraps his arms around your shoulders carefully though, keeping you near to his chest. Your head against where his heart his, the loud, healthy thudding calming you. Soon your small legs become entangled with his.

Echo then joins you both in the small bunk, crawling close to you and snuggling into your back, arms around your waist and face wedged into the crook of your neck. Sticking his feet under Fives’ warm legs, he smiles into your skin.

“Are you feeling okay?”

But the only answer he got was a loud snore from you.

This will be one hell of a situation to explain to the captain, but it’s worth it for her.

[bregee13]

A New Home WIP

Here's what I wrote of this so far. There is a LOT l have yet to write. So much so, that I've been debating on splitting this up in to multiple parts.

Also this story is part of a long series of stories I already wrote, so context is important in order to understand what's going on. You can read what I've written so far here.

But if that's way too long (I don't blame you), here's a TLDR: There was a Raposa family living in Rapoville that comprised of a mom (Nixie), a dad (Bob), a son (Hunter), and a daughter (Polly). Hunter for a while was secretly going to the twilite woods on his own. Polly eventually found out Hunter's secret, and threatened to tell on him if he didn't let her go with him through the forest gate to see the twilite woods. When the two went into the twilite woods, a flyin rabbit doll attacked Polly and cursed her into making a flyin rabbit doll (which she named Bongo). After a big argument between Hunter and Polly, Hunter ran to the twilite woods. But the darkness around Rapoville was getting worse, and ended up trapping Hunter in the forest gate region (he's fine, he'll go on to live with the Baki there. Nobody knows that though). Nobody knows where Hunter was except Polly, and she was extremely guilty about it. She tried to enter the darkness to try rescuing him, but was caught by Cricket. But when she noticed she dropped Bongo right next to the expanding wall of darkness, she ran up to get it (risking her life in the process, which resulted in Bongo absorbing a lot of loving energy). But Cricket managed to save her from the darkness. Eventually the darkness gets so bad that Polly and her parents are forced to move out of the village (via the bridge).

This story picks up with them moving through the snow gate region into the forest gate region, and them having to deal with a new temporary home. Also a bunch of other stuff, especially Bongo stuff, but I didn't get to that part yet. 😭

The actual WIP is under the read more.

It wasn't before long until the Raposa family wandered into the snowy fields. At first the snow barely dusted the grass beneath their feet, but eventually the snow became almost knee deep. It was a good thing Polly thought of bringing blankets with them. Even then, the three wished they had the time to change into warmer clothing.

Polly, while squeezing her dad's arm for support, shivered uncontrollably. "D-dad??? Why did-didn't we u-use the S-snow G-gate...?"

Nixie, who was also freezing, couldn't help but glare at her husband. "That's a g-good question, Polly! Bobby, why DIDN'T we use the snow g-gate?"

"Nghh..." 'How's this my fault? Movin dis way was YOUR idea...' As much as Bob wanted to say it out loud, he was much too tired to butt heads. Besides, after trudging through the snow for that long, you almost HAD to blame somebody. Though, if he didn't say anything, Nixie would freeze him to death before any snow could. "Well, if we w-went through the snow gate, we could've walked right i-into darkness. A-and dat wouldn't be fun, would it?"

Nixie, who was starting to remember her plan, felt her cheeks flush a little more than they already were. Though embarrassed, she welcomed the extra warmth on her face.

"B-but.... Why did-didn't we go to th-the dock?? A-and r-ride a boat somewhere?" Polly asked, hoping asking more questions would distract her from the cold.

Her mother shook her head. "N-no... We couldn't have done that. The d-darkness might've covered the dock by then..."

"M-might've!?! Y-you didn't k-know?!"

"I...I... Um... f-figured there wouldn't be any more boats sailing to and from there anyway... With all this darkness, of course... Of course...."

"Th... That... s-sounds..." Polly tried to call her mom out on her poor excuse, but she was just too frozen to speak.

"Dat sounds like a c-cra... crummy excuse, N-Nix.."

Nixie turned her head toward Bob in confusion. "Wh...what? Are you saying, Bobby?"

Bob stared off into the distance. He longed to go back home and sleep in the warmth of his bed, but he knew that was impossible. "D-dere was no h-harm in checkin first... Ya k-knew dere was a chance of esc-cape dere.... W-what the Rapo stopped ya...?"

"Oh... U-um... You know, um..." 'Well, you didn't bother to check either! Why blame me...?' It took a moment for Nixie to regain some of her composure. She knew she was the only one planning anything out, and that Bob likely didn't even think of checking the docks in the heat of the moment. She actually thought about leaving the village by boat many times. But the one thing that stopped her every time was her fear. "...E-even if there was a way.... Th-there's no way to know what to expect... The o-other villages might be worse off than where we w-were.... There's no way... There's no way...." While she did fear the darkness in other villages, she did have one other small fear that she was afraid to admit. She was scared of returning to her parents after going missing for so long. 'Only Creator knows how those two would react...'

"...Y-ya got a point.... I haven't h-heard from Jack in a real long time... H-Hope he and the folks are alright in Lavasteam... N-nice.... hot..... L-Lavasteam...." 'Rapo... This snow is messin with our heads n' makin us lookin all ridiculous!'

Bob looked back toward Polly. She hadn't spoken for a while now, which was odd for her. On top of that, she was moving at a snail's pace, slowing everyone down as a result. "Polly? Ya doin okay?"

"..." Polly, shaking rapidly, fully relied on her father's arm for support. She had a hard time gathering her words and saying them out loud. She felt horrible. "D-dad....." She cried. "I...I can't feel my legs......."

"Dat can't be good.... Hang on..." Bob walked up to Nixie and handed her the clothes he was carrying. "Hold dis for a s-sec?"

"O-oh... Of... Of course..."

Bob then proceeded to lift Polly off the ground, and carry her in his arms. "Urk!" 'She's heavier than I remember!' "It's okay... you're o-okay... Y-you you're gonna be okay, okay?" He tried to reassure her, but it only seemed to make everything worse. 'Oh Creator, she's real cold....' As worried as Bob was, he knew he couldn't show too much concern. For all he knew, it would just jinx everything. "...Y-Ya got uhh... Um... Bangle with ya? Ah! I..! I m-meant...! B....Bon...Go?"

Polly, squeezing her stuffed friend in her arms, didn't even bother to correct her dad. Though the fact that he caught the mistake on his own really meant a lot to her. "Mhmm..."

"G-good. Dat's good... "

Nixie took the clothes that were handed to her and covered her daughter with them as if they were extra blankets. "There. H-hope that will help s-somehow..."

"Th-thank thank you..."

The three silently continued on their journey through the snow. The bitter wind brushed their cheeks. Eventually, the snow began to die down, and the air was less stiff. The knee-high snow turned into mere frost. Needless to say, everyone was relieved. The ice life is NOT a nice life.

The wide open snow fields slowly turned into a chilly forest. The trees were of a purplish hue and had seemingly no end to them. It was clear that they had entered the forest gate region.

Bob, now getting tired of carrying her around, set Polly down by one of the many trees. "There ya go. Are ya feelin any better?"

Polly slowly nodded. "Y-yeah."

Nixie leaned down to feel Polly's arm. "She's still really cold..." She turned to her husband. "What should we do now?"

Bob looked up at the sky. It wouldn't be too long before it grew dark. "We gotta get some shelter. Can't rest out in da open..."

"Where are we going to find this shelter, anyhow?"

"We're gon have to build it from scratch... Don't expect nothin fancy, I don't got no tools to work with."

"That's fine... But..." She looked down at Polly before returning her gaze to Bob. "Are you going to be alright by yourself?"

Bob tried to reassure her with a smile. "I'll be good on my own. Don't worry bout me. Just worry bout her."

"...Okay. Just be back soon."

"I will." Bob stepped back from his family and got to work.

Now, Bob may be a carpenter, but he wasn't exactly experienced in wilderness survival. Lucky for the three Raposa, he managed to put a small shelter together out of branches and leaves. And for the restrictions he had, it was relatively spacious. Just big enough for everyone to lay in comfortably.

Nixie had Polly wrapped up in her arms. "How are you feeling, baby? Are you warmer now?"

Polly yawned. "Yeah. I'm okay. I think Bongo's a little tired though. Are you tired, Bongo?"

"..."

"Yeah... He's pretty tired..." Polly's eyes had grown heavy from the exhausting journey she had been through.

Nixie, who was tired as well, softly chuckled to herself. "It seems that you're tired too. How about we get ready for bedtime?"

"Yeah… Okay." Polly stretched.

"Are you well enough to get up on your own?"

"I think so..." Polly slowly started to get up off of the ground. Although her legs were a little wobbly from sitting too long.

Nixie reached out for her daughter in an attempt to stable her. "Are you alright?!"

"I'm okay! I'm okay! My legs are just sleepy."

"Come on, I'll help you over there." Nixie had her arm wrapped around Polly's body, helping to guide her to the makeshift home Bob had made. "Bobby! Is the shelter finished over there?"

Bob looked back at his wife, and sighed. "It's 'bout as done as it's gonna get... Hope it works just fine."

"It looks wonderful. Why don't you take a break and get some rest? It's been quite a long day."

"It is gettin pretty late, huh? Alright. I'll take a breather."

"That's what I wanted to hear! Besides, a good sleep in there will make the perfect test for the structure you made."

"That's true..."

Polly pulled her mother's arm toward the shelter. She was starting to get cranky from a lack of sleep. "Mooom... C'mon! We gotta go to bed! Bongo's really really tired!"

"Alright, Polly! Settle down! We're on our way. Why don't you go on ahead and get ready for dreamland?" Nixie suggested.

"Okay..." Polly yawned. "G'night...." She squeezed Bongo in her arms, and stepped inside.

Nixie glanced at her husband. "We should follow her."

Bob nodded. "Yeah, I guess we should..."

The two stepped inside the structure. The dirt floor was covered in a bedding of grass and leaves, which in turn was covered by the largest blanket they had brought. It was cozy to say the least.

Polly was already laying down, curled up underneath her very own blanket. She held onto her doll as tightly as she could. Her eyes were shut. As far as Nixie and Bob could tell, she was already fast asleep.

“She looks so peaceful…” Nixie whispered.

“Dat didn’t take very long at all, huh?”

“That journey must have drained all of the energy from her. I don’t believe I blame her.”

“Poor Polly… I sure hope all dat snow didn’t leave her sick…”

“I hope so too. She didn’t seem to be all that ill, just tired. ...I have faith that she’ll turn out alright.”

Bob sighed. “Rapo, what’d we do to deserve any of this? We lost nearly everythin, and now we gotta live in this… this… whatever this is!”

“You’re the one who built the shack… I don’t see why you’re the one complaining.” Nixie mumbled.

“...What was that supposed to mean?”

��Nothing. It doesn’t mean anything. It’s fine.” Nixie clearly sounded annoyed. “It’s not a permanent solution, anyhow… We’re not staying too long.”

“...Are you insulting my work?”

“Bobby, please.”

“No no, I get it. I understand! I don’t wanna live here either! Who da Rapo would? In fact, it’s so awful dat any normal Raposa would rather sleep outside on the dirt and die!”

“We may as well be…” Nixie muttered.

“Excuse me?! I worked real hard to set this up! All by myself with no tools, no help of any kind, and you’re talkin to me like that?! A lil while ago, you said it was fantastic. I worked the best that I could under these circumstances, and now you’re mad it ain’t good enough?!”

“Bobby, you know that isn’t what I meant.”

“Really? What else could you have meant by that?! I don’t understand anything you’re saying, Nix! First you said one thing, then you say the opposite? I don’t understand at all...” Bob crossed his arms and hung his head low. His eyes were starting to water in frustration. “...Explain to me, Nix. What’s wrong? What’d I do wrong? What the Rapo did I do to you to make you insult me like dat?!”

“Rapo, you didn’t do anything! Nothing is wrong! Why would you come to the conclusion that everything is your fault?! What the Rapo do you even think you did?”

“I-I dunno… I was just askin you that! Ya can’t just say ‘nothin is wrong’ right after complaining your rear off to me!”

“Well maybe I’m just feeling a little peeved.”

“Peeved?!”

“Of course I’m peeved! I didn’t want this! I didn’t want to be forced out of my home, I didn’t want to have to worry about whether or not we’ll make it out of this okay, and I surely didn’t want you to yell at me!”

“Yell at ya?! Nix, you’re da one dat started it!”

“Bobby, what the Rapo are you talking about? I didn’t start anything! You just got mad at me out of nowhere!”

“Out of- What?! I-I would never do dat to you! I would never yell or get mad at you for no reason!”

“Then why are you yelling at me right now then?”

“B-because... I’m mad because you insulted me!” He began to cry. “I’m mad because you decided to be mean at me for no reason! I’m mad… because I don’t understand why you would do that…”

“Bobby?”

“That… that really hurt, Nix… Why would you go and do that?”

“Bobby… I… I’m so sorry.” She gently lifted his chin up so she could see his face better. “I’m sorry.”

Bob looked at her and sniffled. “I don’t understand, Nix. I-I know it ain’t the best I’ve done, but you ain’t gotta be mean about it…”

“I wasn’t trying to be mean to you… I… I was just frustrated. And I ended up saying the wrong thing… I know that wasn’t right for me to snap like that, but… I’m sorry…”

“I know you’re sorry… I know you’re just stressed out. Dat just… really got to me for some reason. I-I’m sorry I overreacted.”

“Bobby… You didn’t overreact. It’s okay. It’s my fault for upsetting you.” She sighed. “We’re both just... frazzled from all of this. I understand.”

“...I forgive ya Nix. I know ya didn’t mean what you said.” He faintly smiled for a moment. “But… Dere’s somethin I don’t understand. Why’d ya say it looked good earlier? I don’t get it.”

“...You want me to be honest? I... was trying to be polite. I didn’t want something like this to happen. Especially not in front of Polly. ...Wait a minute. Polly!” She turned around to face Polly, hoping that she was fast asleep and didn’t hear anything they said.

Polly, who was watching the entire time, hid under her blanket once she got caught. ‘Rapo! She saw me!’ She then pretended to be sleeping, hoping that she wasn’t in trouble.

Nixie sighed and turned back to her husband. “We really need to pull ourselves together, don’t we?”

Bob nodded. “If I were her, I wouldn’t want my folks arguing over nothin… I’d want em to be happy. I’d wanna be sure that it’s all gonna be okay. ...We gotta do better for her.”

“You’re right. From now on, we have to stay positive. No matter what happens.”

“Of course. We gotta set an example. It’s what Polly deserves. It’s what Hunter deserves too.”

“...Yeah.”

“...I wonder if Hunter’s doin alright. Maybe… Maybe he’s alive somehow?”

“I don’t want to talk about Hunter...”

“Alright, I understand.”

The two stood there for a moment in awkward silence.

[i-need-air]

Hawks Fluff Alphabet.

So I wrote this because I was bored, thought it was fun and it ended in 2,4k words. Casually. No biggie. Just chillin here. I think it's been done a million times already bUT have aNotHer oNe.

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Lazy days together are the definition of perfection for him. The domestic vibe those days have make him belong somewhere. For a hero that's been forced to have a one track mind to now have this intimacy plus on these days he gets some rest with his significant other... Perfection.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Your face and your expressions. He studied people for so long that he's a natural at it and when it comes to you, it's all so comforting. Your smile; the way your eyes sparkle, small wrinkles at their corner, the sweet curving of your lips. Your blush; cheeks flustered, you denying it, head turning the other way, pouty face depending on how he teased you. Your frown; determination in your orbs, the clear need to argue written all over you. Your concentration face, your daydreaming face, you...

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

If you're feeling down he takes his compliments a step higher yet his voice gets softer. It lacks the teasing edge it normally has. Attempts to cook, fails, brings you take-out. Tries to make you smile all the time, mostly by being a dumb chicken or by being cheesy.

If you're having a panic attack/are depressed, he's attentive and listens to everything you have to say. Is there to support you and will try to give you a hand, just tell him when you're ready to take the step. Hugs and full of sincere love.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Has always dreamed about a big family, even if he's actually terrified of the idea. He had a disfunctional upbringing, filled with poverty, alcohol and arguments and then he has been thrown into a life of basically military training from a very young age. He wants stability, he wants his chance to find love, enjoy a normal person's life, go on casual dates, sing in the rain, get married, have kids... the image of being called Papa crosses his mind. Getting old, having a big house filled with warmth. Hopefully someday you'll allow him that. But first he has to allow himself have it.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

Goes with the flow? Sometimes he takes the wheel, sometimes you do. He doesn't think one has to be more dominant than the other. Always asks and considers your opinion about things.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

Hmm. Fights happen, sure, but rarely since he's one to stop and track back once one starts. He likes to communicate the problem from the very beginning. Once a fight does step out of hand he over-explains things, which can get very frustrating. He wants you to see his side of the story too so he'll need some acknowledgement from your part before willing to listen more too. He's not stubborn but expects to be heard too. If it gets too much, you both have to decide to cool off and talk later. Keigo is easy at forgiving because in that time he considered your point of view and hopes you're willing to discuss things calmly. Although these type of fights almost never happen. More like arguments with Facts™. He does not shout. He won't relive his childhood, he's better than that.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

Very verbal about it with a teasing edge. Loves to hear how you indeed wanted to, for example, pamper him. Appreciative of every small thing you do for him since he's not used to people caring about him on a personal level. Even the fact that you ask him how was his day, how is he feeling, so on, makes him thankful.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Before the LoV he wouldn't tell you about his missions when they were on-going, but afterwards he'd slip some juicy details casually. Makes you pinky promise to not spill things but actually does keep stuff to himself. Yeah, you get some exclusive details, specially if he gets hurt and tries to make you feel better. Keeps stuff that could bring harm to you. Doesn't tell you about the LoV, just promises you he's always going to be there, so don't question when he dissappear for a few days. Trust him, please.

About casual things, gossip and other stuff he's an open book. "So I was casually flying while on duty and you won't guess who I saw kissing who... 👀"

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

You made him belong somewhere. I mentioned it before but he has a reason to go home, a reason to look at the phone without expecting the Commission on his ass or a "friend" that only cares about his status. He's got that's tranquility he craved.

He will always encourage you to be your best self in a way or another.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Doesn't get overly jealous but might be insecure at times. Maybe you deserve better, someone who has the time to be there for you, someone that might not die the following day... If he sees someone getting close to you and with intentions clear of pursuing you, not just flirting, he'll get into that mentality. A tiny spark of possessiveness awakens in him but remains casual and laid back.

This is one of the concerns he doesn't voice straight away to you but will, eventually. Just tell him he's all you need.

If the person just flirts with you, Keigo knows you can handle yourself. Will step in if you're uncomfortable and will, without a doubt, make that person 10x more uncomfortable. He does trust you completely, even if the insecurities get to him at times.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Oh, yes. His kisses range from sweet to needy and even the smallest peck has passion in it, which you can see in his eyes afterwards.

Your first kiss was after a date, something casual as he tried his best to do it right, you know? At your front door when he dropped you off after a full date of trying to be being a gentleman, he waits for you to lean in as a signal, but he couldn't help himself to interrupt your sweet goodbyes. "Can I kiss you, dove?"

Slow, sweet, he breathes you in as he encircles your frame in his arms. One of his favorite memories and also his favorite kisses.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

People consider him flirty but he's just good at compliments. With you in the picture? Now that's Hawks actually flirting. And it was supposed to be his way of telling you he's very much interested. And he's smooth.

Overall decides to be casual yet serious about it. When he finally gets time alone with you he just tells you he's really interested and would love if you wanted to grab something to eat that same night. As a date.

The first "I love you" is quiet, he stops what he's doing and just grabs your wrist gently, looking into your eyes. It does take time to process the emotion and to assure himself it's okay to say it. Does confess at a random time but soon you learn he just really couldn't hold it in anymore. After the first one he never stops saying it. Makes you wonder if he's a chicken or a parrot.

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

Ultimately, yes. I already went through it before, he dreams of that.

After the LoV ordeal and when everything settled, he'll be ready to do it. It somehow taught him that life is short and he needs to take the wheel in this one. He has many scenarios in head but goes to a simple night out, renting the top of a building, preparing it with a single table in the middle of it. Lights, flowers decorating everything. Personal chef, beautiful view. And a ruby engagement ring.

[I made a whole post about married Hawks, check that out 👀]

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

Dove, love, angel... And then some very cheesy ones. All the cheesy nicknames actually. All of them.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

It depends on who he's with. If he's with people he trusts, which are not many, he'll be talking about you all the time. Proclaims he's in love, doesn't care. His smiles are more sincere and if you'd known him for long enough you'd see how he didn't have such a weight on his shoulders.

Clearly won't go proclaiming it to villains, so there's that. Is very careful about mentioning you to the Commission too, he's worried they'd use you against him. They do know you're together but that's all they need to know.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

C'mon, shy away from kisses? Keeps it lowkey from the media but apart from that? Who can deny you some smooches?

You met his friends, all being heroes like him, and you both are officially The Couple™. You know what I'm talking about.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

His ability to read people and his honesty about it made you avoid some harmful "friends" that came your way. Know that he just means the best when he mentions something.

On a more casual level, his feathers bringing you both stuff from the kitchen while you lazy around in the couch is just 10/10.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Ok, this boy is somehow a romantic but a dumb romantic. Likes clichés but with his twist, mostly humorous.

Brings you little things that reminded him of you, it's his thing to prove that you're always on his mind even if he's far away.

"No, baby, don't leave me! I love you... I can't live without you!" while grabbing you close as you were to leave.

"Keigo. I'm just going to work."

... or...

"Love, there's a storm, let's make out in the pouring rain."

"Did you just wake me up at 3 A.M. to–"

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Definitely. He likes to encourage you to do your best and if he can help somehow, he will. Sees so much potential in you. Will be your personal cheerleader.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

Balances it. Does enjoy some structure but with you he learned he can also let go, so don't be surprised when he grabs you one day and takes you to a random carnival or something. Is bummed because he can't be as spontaneous as he wanted because of his fame, but it's okay, he can bring the spontaneous at home.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Observant man as he is, Keigo knows you pretty well. Which is okay actually, he wants to know you as much as possible and loves growing and maturing with you.

Listens to you and considers what you have to say and believe me, your words mean a lot to him.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

When he got so attached to you he tried to separate himself from the thought of a relationship but just as he started the process he also stopped instantly. Hawks knew you were important from the moment his heart ached to be near you and that feeling remains to this day.

Loves you. Just... Loves you. You're so important in his life it actually scares him. Because life is also unpredictable, his job specially. Many people hate him...

It's a thought that invades his mind frequently. He's past the point of backing out, so what he needs to do is to protect the most precious human being he's ever known with all his power.

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

I don't know why but I feel he's a very artistic person. As in he draws and has a small sketchbook in his jacket all the time. And many pages are filled with drawings of you.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

Dumb romantic chicken loves the affection and the attention that comes with it. Give him both. Drop everything you're doing and give him love, damnit. Hugs are a must; his chin on your shoulder watching you do something; his head in your chest as you play with his hair; sit on his lap and smooch his face while he just hugs you tight. Skin contact is very important to him and I think it's his actual love language.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

Pouty and an attention whore although nobody notices. Once he gets the time, he texts you how much he misses you. He's very vocal about it so expect 17 texts in a row telling you. All written the same minute. Guess what happens 5 minutes later? 20 more texts.

Just give him a call already. That's when you hear him pout about it. Loves hearing your voice but if you're far apart for too long he will ruin a cute romantic moment with an innocent "So what are you wearing?"

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

It might sound crude but him being in a relationship with you while the world is basically on fire is enough saying. He can't let you go anymore. He doesn't think he ever was after landings his eyes on you. Will fight for this relationship and promised himself to protect you from danger.

[dearfuturehusbandblog]

Welcome To The World, LittleBean: A Life Update

Dear Future Husband,

My sister had the baby! And it made me depressed.

I kind of receded from the world for a couple of weeks and stopped talking to people I enjoy talking to, and stopped doing things I enjoy doing, and kind of stayed in my room unless it was absolutely necessary to leave.

Why, might you ask, would I have done such a thing as a response to such a happy event?

Well, for some of the reasons I've written about previously. The emotional weight of the sadness that comes along with seeing a younger sibling live through something you yourself desire but feel you'll never have, is probably the biggest.

But another reason I've been really down is because of my mother.

Dear old MotherLivelyHeart has problems.

I think I've mentioned this previously, but if/when I marry, I will most definitely be marrying INTO a family and as "out" of my own as I possibly can.

MotherLivelyHeart suffers from anxiety and depression. Shocker, I know.

In fact, my inner voice is comprised mainly of her criticism and negativity. Shocker, I know.

Dear old MotherLivelyHeart has never really wanted to be a mother, as far as I can tell. Shocker? ...I dunno.

When I was growing up, my mother used to always say "I only had children for the grandkids" and everyone would laugh. But HAHA! it wasn't a joke. I figured out pretty early on that she was kind of serious with that statement.

But nothing in my life confirmed that until she was on the phone with her machutanim on the day LittleBean was born and repeated that sentiment to them.

So, all my life, she's struggled with being the parent she never wanted to be in order for us to have offspring that she could love and adore and spoil and then send home to their parents without having to parent herself.

THIS is the "home" I came from.

THIS is the parenting I received.

It's absolutely no wonder I'm so screwed up.

My mother has been overbearing my entire life. And a lot of it comes from her own insecurities and anxieties and lack of the world living up to her expectations. Which is kind of understandable.

The problem comes when those expectations come at the cost of other peoples' comfort and safety.

LilSis had a c-section. The baby wasn't exactly breached, but was flipped at a weird angle and stuck. The baby was also a meconium baby, so while it was already over a week past the due date, LilSis thought she still had time. But as it turned out there wasn't any time because when she went for what she thought was a routine check up, they induced her and after two days of labor and nothing happening, they did the c-section.

Now, LilSis made it clear earlier this year that she didn't want anyone at the hospital with her aside from her doula and husband. No visitors, family included. The rest of us seemed to accept this, but MotherLivelyHeart just kind of smirked and went, "yeah, ok, we'll see about that."

And I get that LilSis is her baby.

I get that it's not easy to see your child suffer.

I get that she's been waiting her whole life to be a grandmother.

I get that she's had expectations about what it would be like to meet her grandchildren, especially her first grandchild.

I. GET. IT.

But when LilSis facetimed and showed us the baby and B"H the baby looked fine but LilSis was clearly too pale and weak and dizzy and needed to get off the phone, but again repeated that she didn't want anyone coming to the hospital, dear old MotherLivelyHeart's response was that she wanted to "surprise" them at the hospital.

"I don't need to ask permission."

"I'm not a 'visitor', I'm her MOTHER."

"I don't need permission to see my own daughter."

"I know what she needs, I'll just drop it off, give her a hug and leave."

"I don't need to see her, I just want to see the baby."

UHM, NOOOOOOOOO.

Your daughter is almost 30.

She's been married for over half a decade.

She has a right to her space and her boundaries for her little nuclear family and YOU ARE CROSSING THEM by even THINKING that would be acceptable.

And the next day, my mother called LilSis and asked her about something she wanted to bring with her. LilSis made it clear that she didn't want anyone to come. When my mother didn't seem to get this, my brother in law texted her a kind "now isn't a good time" message and my mother felt "ganged up on".

She went into a tailspin.

"They don't like me."

"What did I ever do to them that they hate me so much?"

"I've been dissed and dismissed."

"They've cut me out of their lives."

And sooooooo many other thoughts along those lines.

There isn't even enough space here to describe all the insane things she did as a response to this "rejection" she was experiencing.

She was 100000000000% projecting her own thoughts, expectations, and experiences with her own c-section onto LilSis and the whole situation was absurd.

Then LittleBean ended up back in the hospital because of some complications and LilSis and her husband still wanted space.

Now, what MotherLivelyHeart doesn't know, because I will never tell her, is that I saw LittleBean before she did.

Because I'm actually supportive and respectful of boundaries, when they got home LilSis and her husband allowed me to come by and drop stuff off, and run some errands for them (while they were still keeping overbearing MotherLivelyHeart at arms length). So I met LittleBean like 3 or 4 times. And the babes is absolutely precious. <3

LilSis and her husband finally let MotherLivelyHeart over this past week to meet LittleBean and help out and it's like a switch was flipped. Suddenly everything for MotherLivelyHeart is sunshine and rainbows and I legit can't handle the mood swings.

But I digress....

One night last week I drove around and cried and screamed for an hour.

It absolutely sucks when you have no one to talk to.

Which brings me to the next part of my life update:

I finally spoke to a therapist.

So, I thought I was ghosted by the therapist I wanted to speak to. It took a few days, but he finally responded there was an issue with his online scheduler and he needed me to reschedule.

Fine, whatever.

I rescheduled for two weeks from that date (which had already been rescheduled from two weeks prior). So, now it's been a month and a half.

Fine, whatever.

Well, my meeting with him ended up being earlier this week. As it turns out, this therapist I wanted to speak to isn't taking on new clients at the moment, so he was acting more as triage for his practice and had a 15 minute zoom call with me before picking a therapist from his practice he thought I'd connect with.

So the next night I had an hour and a half zoom call with her and she's absolutely lovely and has experience working with children and adults who have experienced similar situations to the one I'm in.

For $120 I had my thought processes and experiences validated.

But that's pretty much it.

She told me I sound pretty level headed and understand what's healthy and what's not healthy in my life and in my past (which is one of the problems with being an overthinker, overanalyzer, and having done extensive research to try and figure out WTF is wrong with me), and she told me there are some exercises to try and reduce stress because it's clear that I'm overstressed and have been since I was a child, and even possibly since birth.

But these are all things I knew already. These are all things I've validated for myself. Yes, it's nice to hear a specialist say the same things, but for $120!?

I literally had to use unemployment money to pay for that. Unemployment that I'm going to have to end pretty soon.

How on EARTH am I supposed to be able to afford continued therapy when it costs so bloody much!?

It's absolutely awful that the people who need therapy the most are the ones who can't afford it.

And I found an organization that claims to help anyone who asks without needing an explanation, so I messaged them a brief "my life is a mess and I need to talk to a therapist. I found someone I think I can connect with, but it costs $120." and they sent me $10.

They said they help anyone who asks without an explanation.

I gave a valid explanation with a specific amount requested.

And they sent me $10.

It just so often feels like I'm banging my head against a wall.

Like I'm a joke to Hashem.

This random organization was like a beacon in the dark. A sign from Hashem that if I reach out for help, I can receive it.

He put this organization into my path and awareness just at the time that I needed it.

All so that He could mock me.

OF COURSE the therapy practice I chose doesn't take insurance.

Not that it would help, because my OBAMAdoesntCARE has been PENDING SINCE OCTOBER.

So OF COURSE I have to pay out of pocket.

And OF COURSE it costs so damn much.

And OF COURSE when I reach out for help I get laughed at.

What did they think I was supposed to do with the $10?

That's literally 1/12 of what I needed.

Even the Torah has us give more than that in maaser.

I legitimately don't understand.

Where do I have to go and what do I have to do to get a sugar daddy to pay for this so I can get my goddamn life in order!?

I'm literally drowning out here and God is throwing me half-deflated pool floaties.

On the bright side, I keep making amazing non-Jewish internet friends.

Do you know how much that sucks?

That I'm literally getting more support from non-Jewish internet friends that live halfway across the world than I am from my own community?

And it sucks even more to know that Hashem put those people into my path too!!

He literally keeps giving me things that He knows will make me feel worse because they make me feel better but also disconnected from the Jewish community, and not giving me things that would make me feel better and closer to Him and the Jewish community.

What am I supposed to do with that knowledge!?

I've often wondered if maybe I just wasn't meant to be Jewish. Like maybe there was some mistake and my mother isn't really Jewish and therefore I'm not Jewish and this is Hashem's way of telling me that I just need to separate myself from the Jewish world and go seek a secular life because that's truly who I'm supposed to be.

Except that my parents were married by a really chashuv community rav who did his research and would not have married my parents if there'd been even one safek as to her Jewishness.

And so, I'm stuck.

I'm stuck feeling constantly disconnected from the community that's supposed to be my rock and support. By the God who's supposed to be merciful and kind.

It's exhausting.

Are you out there? Do you feel the same? Are you a BT or ger or someone else who has lived both lives and can explain to me why yiddishkeit is better?

I have too much Jewish guilt to walk away from any of this, but I have too much mental stress to keep striving to be a part of it.

It's utterly exhausting to be stuck in the middle.

I hope you're doing better than I am.

-LivelyHeart