#i was very close to my previous partner but never developed any romantic attraction so that really confused things

[shouts-into-the-void]

I've been coming to the realization that I'm demiromantic over the past week, which is extremely uncomfortable given I've identified as Aro-Ace for the past three years, and I've obviously been met with a lot of the "you'll find the right person eventually" crowd

[a-libra-writes]

I absolutely love all of your Mordecai stories! Could you write one where reader is specifically male and how that would affect the relationship? Or a more general scenario where Mordecai makes a habit of fixing reader’s appearance for symmetry, definitely not because he wants an excuse to stand so close to them.

hhhhhh okay i had to prioritize this because i just. i have so much brainrot about this stupid hitman esp with a male partner in particular !!! This will be adjacent to the part 3 of Romantic HC's with him (and I included ur cute symmetry idea in that one instead!) I have a lot of thoughts..

First off, I HC him as gay ace, and that is what I tend to go off whenever I write him. These are my own thoughts and obvs yall can have something totally different! With that said...

He would be slightly more open and have an easier time getting to know a man, simply because of the socialization and gender expectations in the 20's. With women he's always been uneasy because of the unspoken, unknown "expectation" of interacting with them. (though if she wasn't ladylike at all and toted around a gun or dressed masc he'd probs feel otherwise, see him interacting fine with Serafine). Again, 1920's socializing acting as if women are an entirely different creature from men and should be treated as such. So, he'd be a little more accepting of touches and attention from a man because that's more familiar, but we're talking 10% more. Not a huge jump.

As stated in the previous HC's, this is still years of building trust between the two of you before he's willing to acknowledge any feelings. If you're openly gay or bi during this time, he's never been judgmental about it like some might be. Actually, Mordecai doesn't think about your potential love life in the slightest, at least until you two begin to get closer. Then suddenly he's thinking about it.

Attraction has never been something he's experienced, at least not in the way he's heard men talk about women (which, ew, that kind of talk is disgusting). But as you two become closer, he develops emotional and physical attraction toward you; both are confounding and frustrating. It's less sexual attraction and more a very intense physical admiration, even if that person doesn't have conventionally attractive features.

(Personally I think he'd be very attracted to either a very tall and muscular type - similar to Viktor - or a smaller, slender more "pretty" kind of guy. Two opposites on a spectrum, which he admires for different reasons.)

Regardless, it's awful, Mordecai has no idea why this is hitting him just now in his mid-fucking-20s after a whole adolescence of not seeing people that way. The physical admiration comes and goes, but the emotional attraction always hits him like a train when you're both together.

This is probably Totally Normal for close friends who are also comrades that murder people together. This is fine.

Note it's possible you have plenty of other admirers, which gives him even more agitated and conflicting feelings. If it's women fawning over you - even if you aren't interested - that's easy for Mordecai to deal with. Women have bothered him plenty of times, at least until they realize how cold and awkward he is and give up. He doesn't understand why you have to smile and flirt back, but, well, at least that doesn't upset them ....

Men flirting with you is a bit of a different story, especially if you've always been open and comfortable with your own sexuality. The women seem harmless, the men do not. You have this ease and freedom with them that Mordecai doesn't understand and somewhat envies. He can't brush off their attention as being "silly" like the women are; they don't just want to dance with you. It agitates him so much and he struggles to fully articulate why. Maybe a small voice in his head tells him that if he were more normal, maybe you might be just as attentive to him. That you have expressed your trust and affection to him, but he struggles in returning it, so it's no wonder you might seek it elsewhere.

In this time period, there's incredibly little understanding around the concept of asexuality (and even then, it's written as though it's a disease or mental failure). Mordecai has certainly never heard of such things, and he's never struggled with his lack of sexual attraction until his feelings began developing for you. This is why he becomes so jealous if you're free with your love and attention to others. Before you both were ever a real "thing" (but the feelings were very much there, hanging unspoken between you), Mordecai would start huge arguments about whoever you'd be sleeping around with. He hadn't cared for years, and now he does? Seriously, if you smell like another man Mordecai goes from 0 to 100 and barks at you to wash up. You point out that Viktor always smells like sawdust and oil but Mordecai doesn't shove him into the bathroom.

Viktor thinks whatever you two have going on with these spats is just weird. More than once he's yanked you both by the neck and tossed you out of the garage for being so noisy.

(Note if you're someone whose on a similar wavelength as Mordecai, or you simply don't enjoy sleeping around with strangers and prefer close connections, that jealousy simmers down considerably. No, these are not healthy reactions or feelings he has. He has never been a well-adjusted individual. )

Once you both are more of an established ""couple"" (if thats what this strange long-term pining and angsting and yearning that's finally become something of a real Thing can be called), Mordecai still wouldn't consider himself "like that". Not because of shame of being gay, but because he genuinely hasn't felt this way toward anyone, man or woman. You're his exception. He likes you.

All the drama aside... Because of the odd nature of you and Mordecai's relationship, plus his closed-off personality and the odd hours you two keep, no one actually suspects the relationship is romantic for a very long time. Mitzi and maybe Atlas have caught onto something, especially if you're open about your attraction to men, but they assume it's a one-sided crush on your part. Viktor is the only one who picks up that Mordecai might feel the same, and only because he's around you both so often and he sees the odd looks and lingering touches - and notably, how you two interact with him is very different with how you interact with each other. Not his business, but he'd protect you both in a heartbeat. Viktor never says it out loud, but he's aware of other associates or employees who may not be accepting of you two and could be a potential threat. He watches them very carefully.

(And related to that - Atlas doesn't think twice about taking you in and treats you with just as much respect as his other employees, which would be remarkable for a known gay man in the 20's. That's probably how he got you signed onto being a triggerman...)

And related to any threats, Mordecai will go fucking feral on anyone who tries to threaten or hurt you for your sexuality. It doesn't matter if you're playing it cool or ignoring them, he's already got his gun out. Viktor will join in too, but he at least asks if you want to kill them or "just" scare them shitless.

So, in closing ... Yes, the relationship would be a little more complicated with a masc person vs a femme because of the time period and the lack of vocabulary+understanding of Mordecai's own identity. A person whose experienced and very comfortable in their own skin would help him out a lot, whether they're asexual or allosexual, someone whose willing to just sit and talk these things out (even if sometimes he's mortified to even bring it up). If the person is just as questioning and confused, well, it might end up more chaotic, hah.

[diagnosed-crazy]

AroAce

Here is a fun story about how I found out I was asexual and why I believe myself to be aromantic.

tl:dr I knew that I was aromantic and asexual because I never felt any type of attraction towards anyone.

When I was in late middle school years, I overheard two of my female classmates (I am also female) talking about how they felt when they looked at someone they thought was “hot”. One of the was like, “Yeah, when I see him, its like a waterfall.”

At the time, I had no idea what the fuck that meant, and not because I was some sheltered child who had never heard a bad word or watched an R rated movie (my family did not care what I watched and I used to play drinking games with my parents and older siblings while drinking a juice box. I was not sheltered). I just could not relate to that experience.

It stuck with me. It was something that I noticed more and more as more of my classmates got into relationship and would share their experiences. I never felt like that, and it wasn’t until I came across the term Asexual that things started to make sense. I wasn’t just a weird kid who hadn’t talked to enough people or looked at enough attractive people or gotten emotionally close enough with someone to feel that way. I just didn’t feel it and there were other people like me.

I came out to my friends junior year of high school because we were at speech practice and someone said something about the not being asexual because they like women too much and I was like “I am.” and that was it.

As for why I suspected I am aromantic, that took me a little bit longer to understand. I considered and accepted that I was aromantic towards the end of my senior year of high school. I hadn’t ever felt romantically attracted to anyone ever. I hadn’t been in any serious relationships. I wasn’t ever interested in anyone, but I kept making excuses of: “Oh, I just don’t talk to many people who aren’t my friends.” or “If I wanted to date someone, I could start talking to someone and I could develop romantic feelings.”

It came down to me thinking about the past relationships that I had been in, and the previous “crush” that I had. The fact that I had only ever had one “crush” should have probably been a factor already, but after I realized I was ace, I started thinking about why I said I had a crush on someone. A close friend at the time was always pressuring me to say something. “Who do you like? Why do you like them?” so finally I gave them a name. A boy with really pretty eyes who was involved in the same things I was, but who I was not friends with or in any of the close circles around me. He was just close enough to not be strange to like, but not close enough that I would ever be asked to socialize with him. (Also I say pretty eyes from an artistic perspective. They were a really cool color and I always wanted to try and paint them.)

I had a hard time accepting that for a while though. I didn’t like the idea of being alone in my life, and while I thought being asexual would make it hard to find someone who would want to be with me, being aromantic to me meant that I was doomed to be alone forever and left behind by all the people around me. I know that this was a stupid thought, but it was how I felt for a while. When I first starting thinking about it, being aromantic to me meant a concrete black and white state of not feeling attracted to anyone or having life partners. That is just not the case. Like everything, being aromantic is also a spectrum, and I have come to feel very comfortable in this little aroace range I am occupying.

I learned that I could still feel romantic attraction, it could just not happen very often (haven’t had it happen yet, but your never know). I learned that even if I never feel romantic attraction, I could still be in healthy and loving romantic relationships. I learned that if I didn’t want a romantic relationship, I could still have a platonic partner.

But most of all, I learned that I am okay with being the crazy mountain lady living alone in the woods that I will probably turn out to be. And I have come to greatly appreciate the fact that I have yet to feel the warm fuzzies because my friends all feel them and it seems like a bunch of unnecessary bullshit. Love triangles and cheating and heartbreak. Granted not all of them have the greatest taste in partners, but I’m good. I don’t want to deal with that first hand. Second hand was more than enough.

[alixofagnia]

OpheThorn III: Back to Rambling

The Memory of Babel…Wow.

If nothing else, this book GOES. We’re dropped onto Babel just as lost, bewildered, and determined as Ophelia to get to the bottom of this ark. Boy, was it worth the wait! Babel is exquisitely written and, incredible as it sounds, even more treacherous than the Pole. The backbone Ophelia shows in this book is awesome! I love that she’s taken the measure of her worth—all the things she’s been through and survived in the previous novels—and come out resilient As Fuck. This book is definitely a penultimate novel. Dazzling as it is, much of it feels like groundwork being laid for the finale.

OpheThorn is less nuanced and ambiguous in Babel. While I feel there’s less to analyze, I do really love this pairing and I like writing about their dynamic. So, I’m just going to put my thoughts down and see what comes up!

[There will be spoilers]

[All fanart images credited to @patricialyfoung​]

Intro

One of the things that drew me into The Mirror Visitor series is the relationship between Ophelia and Thorn. Theirs is not a traditional love story at all; in fact, it avoids clichés and instead plays about with two romantic tropes: enemies to lovers and marriage of convenience. The series spins these tropes anew by offering subtle signs of attraction (discussed here) and giving both characters antisocial tendencies, as well as—in Thorn’s case—possible ASD traits (discussed here).

When we left these two in Clairdelune, Thorn had just put his feelings on the table. Before she could give her response, however, they were separated under upsetting, even traumatic circumstances. Years later, we meet Ophelia again…

Ophelia

…and, oh dear, she is in a sorry state indeed. We find her disastrously operating a waffle stand during a kooky Animist festival for, of all things, clocks. Just what the girl pining for Thorn needs, right? All is not well with Ophelia. As Aunt Rosaline points out,

“No, you’re not fine. You don’t go out anymore, you eat any old thing, you sleep at any old time. You haven’t even been back to the museum.” [19]

Although her mother, sister, and to an extent Aunt Rosaline all believe Ophelia is wasting away, shutting herself in her room, she’s actually been quite busy. She’s been studying and developing working hypotheses about God and the Other: where they are, there she’ll find Thorn. She’s convinced of it. Working from obscure clues dropped in Clairdelune, Ophelia settles on Babel as the ark most likely to yield some answers, and when the chance to travel there appears, she wastes no time at all.

She. Is. Going.

Thorn

In Babel, Thorn has made a name for himself as Sir Henry, rising to become a Lord of LUX, the gatekeepers of Babel who serve a similar function to that of the Doyennes on Anima. He is commanding, magnetic, and aloof as ever. It is unsurprising to find that he has been playing close to the fire again. But the stress and tension of his investigative life on Babel is certainly heightened in a way that it wasn’t at the Pole. 

We also learn that his nickname in Babel is the Automaton due to his unceasing energy. Thorn, thus, has dealt with the separation by predictably burying himself in work.

The Reunion

To Ophelia’s disappointment, the reunion with Thorn does not go quite as she had envisioned, and that’s because she hadn’t really envisioned past the goal of finding him [203]. Ophelia is very much a character who takes things one at a time as she’s confronted by them. When Thorn seems less than pleased to see her, she must consider all these Troublesome Feelings and why his underwhelming reaction upsets her.

The thing is Ophelia is waiting for Thorn to take the lead. But he already did, and she didn’t follow—at least, not in a way that he could understand. As previously discussed, Thorn does not function well with non-verbal cues. He needs to be explicitly told how someone else feels, or how he is making someone else feel, in order to know when to adjust his behavior. That can be quite flustering, especially for someone like Ophelia who struggles to vocalize her feelings exactly as they are.

“Is that it?” Ophelia murmured. “You have nothing more to say to me?”

 “I have, actually,” Thorn muttered, not stopping all his connecting. […] “And you?” he finally asked, in turn. “You have nothing more to say to me?” [263]

She doesn’t. Thorn coldly dismisses her and continues to keep her at arm’s length, especially when he gives her a second chance to confess her feelings and she still refuses to take it. 

Ophelia has social anxiety. She’s not exactly shy, she just gets tongue-tied and befuddled sometimes. It’s part of her make-up, but it doesn’t just happen around Thorn—there are plenty of instances where she has trouble expressing herself to those she cares about, such as Ambrose and Blaise in this novel, or Fox in Clairdelune. She even struggles to express basic gratitude toward Aunt Rosaline in Promise. Unlike them, Thorn challenges her to uncomfortable levels. Her feelings for him are complex and utterly foreign; she has no idea what to do about them. 

Unfortunately, Thorn is fresh out of fucks to give over her see-saw act. He’s well-past this stage of confusion and cowardice she’s experiencing because he’s been in love with Ophelia since Promise (“I’m starting to get used to you”) and dealt with the ramifications of that in Clairdelune (“I don’t give a damn whether people find me suspect, as long as I am not so in your eyes.”). 

Thorn does nothing half-heartedly. In no uncertain terms, he left her with the bluntest of blunt confessions (“By the way, I love you.”), which was a milestone in his emotional growth. It is clear that he does not love frivolously or casually in the way of his foil, Archibald, so for him, nothing has changed in three years. Likely, he thinks this should be obvious to Ophelia, and it probably should be at this point. He’s done all he can, after all, what more can she want? From his perspective, it’s Ophelia’s turn to make a move, not his.

Ophelia, though, functions differently. She has always needed verbal reinforcement and reassurance. That need has been heightened by their long separation. Essentially, they’re out of touch with one another and, in Ophelia’s case, she’s completely out of touch with herself, which is why when prompted by Thorn she doesn’t provide an answer, even though there could be only one reason for her going to Babel. Things finally come to a head when Thorn loses all patience and replaces her as his assistant. Ophelia is pissed.

“You weren’t available. Waiting for you would have slowed me down in my research.”

“Slowed you down? For your information, I was also doing research of my own. It might interest you to learn…”

“Of your own, that’s precisely the problem,” he interrupted her. “I advised you never to leave your division, and you were supposed to warn me if you discovered anything new. Nothing has changed, you still always make your decisions alone.”

“I wanted to help you,” Ophelia hissed, through gritted teeth.

“I don’t want any of your finer feelings. I need efficiency. If you don’t mind, I now have a flight to take.”

Ophelia’s blood ignited in her every vein. “You’re an egoist.” She had wanted to anger Thorn, and she knew, by the way he had frozen on the spot, that she had succeeded. All the shadows of the night suddenly seemed to  have been drawn to the center of his face. He threw Ophelia a look so hard, she reeled from its impact.

“I am demanding, a killjoy, obsessive, antisocial, and crippled,” he intoned, in a forbidding voice. “You can put all the defects in the world on me, but I will not permit you to call me an egoist. If you prefer to do things your way, go ahead, but don’t waste my time anymore. Our collaboration is over.” [305]

OMG, this is harsh. But it’s the kick in the ass Ophelia needs. Since taking up a secret identity as Eulalia and aspiring to become a Forerunner (essentially a scholar and a scribe), she’s already been confronted by the fact that she’s not as good a researcher as she’s prided herself on. Now, she’s being confronted by the suggestion that she’s not a very good partner, either. It leaves her feeling “drier than dust.” [321]

I think it’s interesting how Thorn’s dialogue here has a double meaning. He’s talking about their partnership as an investigative team, of course. But it just as easily applies to their personal relationship. He can’t keep waiting around for Ophelia to make up her mind. He’s got a God to hunt down, an Other to face. Having to wonder about where he stands with Ophelia is getting to be too much. By once again haranguing off on her own, Ophelia has made it plain to him that she prefers to do things without him. In his eyes, she’s pushing him away.

Eventually, she is able to see this perspective and she is ashamed to realize how badly she’s held Thorn to a double standard. He gave of himself through words and gestures as far as he was able, while she gave him nothing in return. Finally, FINALLY, Ophelia fully expresses her love for Thorn and, as he once did, asks him to forgive her shortcomings. It’s a very sweet scene, I must say.  

Now, to go back for a moment, what’s really gutting about Ophelia calling Thorn an egoist is this:

“God said he would keep his eyes on you,” he muttered, in a choked voice. “Right in front of me. I make a lamentable husband, but I permit no one, particularly him, to persecute my wife. It’s impossible for me to tear you away from God, but I can tear him away from you. If a book exists that contains God’s secret, and allows his invulnerability to be punctured, I will find it.” [392]

For context, Ophelia had admonished Thorn for his dogged pursuit of this quest, expressing outrage that he should be doing this for a world that’s done nothing for him. At one time, yes, Thorn may have been acting in the interest of the world. Then, he met Ophelia (who is too curious for her own good) and he met God. God threatened her, and Thorn is not a man who could allow such a thing to go unpunished, no matter the consequence. Ever since they met—through every consideration, every move in this impossible investigation and despite each rejection from her—he’s been acting out of love for Ophelia. 

As Thorn said, he is not an egoist.

The Blind Spot

After their “egoist” argument, Ophelia feels instant regret and tries to stop Thorn from walking away. She doesn’t succeed, however, because she is struck by his claws. At first, she believes he may have done this on purpose, the thought of which really scares her because it indicates that Thorn is absolutely done with her.

Later, after she finally makes her confession, we all learn that, in fact, Thorn has lost a bit of control over his family power. He has no idea that he used his claws on Ophelia. I’m a little bit unsure what caused this vulnerability—I don’t really follow the given reason, so I’m wondering if Thorn doesn’t quite know himself why this has come to be.

My theory is more euphemistic. Ophelia had reached out to touch his turned back and the gesture badly startled him. He overreacts then overcorrects, and they both take a memorable tumble. Thorn explains:

“Never again accost me from behind my back or from any of my blind spots. Don’t do any movement that I can’t see coming in advance, or then warn me out loud.” [389]

He further explains that he can retain control as long as his claws don’t perceive her as a threat and asks her not to be absent-minded with him. I think it’s entirely plausible that his control over his Dragon power has weakened due to his deep emotion regarding Ophelia. I also feel that this speaks closely to their recent conflict as well as Thorn’s coding as autistic. It’s like Thorn is saying, “No more hide and seek. No more games. Tell me straight, or not at all.”

Ophelia knows how deep his passions run. She once held his dice and thought she might die under the weight and intensity of his emotions. Perhaps it is her Animism that has wrought this change in him. Perhaps it is simply her existence. Either way, she can no longer afford to be careless when it comes to Thorn’s feelings. In the final chapter, Ophelia and Thorn have a true heart to heart, reaffirming their partnership. But Thorn has something to add.

“No half-measures,” he interrupted her. “I’m not and do not wish to be your friend.” [445]

What he leaves unspoken is that he wants to be her husband, in every version of the role: Partner. Protector. Lover. Now that Ophelia has given him an answer, Thorn is comfortable leading them forward and it is the role of lover that he specifically has in mind. Considering this is probably the first time he’s ever propositioned a woman for sex, he is understandably quite awkward. Ophelia quickly realizes that she’s added to his inner turmoil by repressing her own sexuality around him and inadvertently making him feel less than attractive. She also understands that she, too, wants to be his wife in every version of that role: Partner. Protector. Lover. What follows is a really beautiful expression of honest acceptance and true value.

Desire

My dudes, our girl is constantly at risk of exploding (or maybe imploding?) with desire in this book. It’s consuming her, emptying her, and driving every atom of her being. Look at this!

Ophelia had received no news from Thorn after his escape. Not a single telegram, not a single letter. She could keep telling herself that he couldn’t run the risk of making contact, that he was a man wanted by the law, perhaps by God himself, but it was eating her up inside. [22]

Whenever she crossed a man who was a bit taller than average, she couldn’t stop herself from looking back as she passed, with a frantic pounding in her chest. [83]

Ophelia would have recognized his voice out of a thousand. The resonance of a double bass, solemn and sullen, that echoed through her inner emptiness, shook her to the core, welled up to her throat, choked her. [240]

She waited until her heartbeat, taxed by the run, had returned to normal. But it didn’t happen. Her entire flesh seemed to be pulsating to a single chaotic rhythm. This evening, she would see Thorn again. [249]

She wanted to be with Thorn right there, right now. She’d wanted that every second of every minute of every hour, for almost three years. [249]

Although she knew the temperature of this place was strictly maintained at minus eight degrees, Ophelia felt as if it were fifteen degrees warmer. Never in her life had she cared about appearances, and yet she ran a nervous hand through her hair to tidy it up. [253]

She suddenly realized that there wasn’t much she would have refused him, had he but asked. [278]

Instead, he disinfected his hands for a second time, as if they really were repulsive. They weren’t in Ophelia’s eyes. From a distance, she took in the network of veins under the skin, the long, curved fingers, the bone that          rose up on each wrist, and suddenly, she felt something like pain in the pit of her stomach. She hadn’t the slightest idea what was happening to her, but looking at those hands made her want to scream. [283]

She felt it again, even more violently, this urgent call from deep inside her. [446]

Ophelia is so horny and I’m so here for it!

Closing Thoughts

Do I think Ophelia’s internal conflict over Thorn is drawn out? Yes. 

Do I think it’s contrived? No.

I think it falls in line with Ophelia’s characterization and I think Thorn’s frosty reaction to her presence in Babel falls in line with his characterization. These characters aren’t perfect: Ophelia is quirky and endearing, but that doesn’t make her immune to cowardice; Thorn is highly skilled and competent but is deficient socially and sometimes emotionally. I can’t emphasize enough how well Christelle Dabos knows her characters and allows them to be who they are rather than force them to make weird changes to fill plot holes.  

We can’t forget, either, the fact that they have been completely cut off from one another for years. Yes, we might think in that time Ophelia could have done more to sort out her feelings. But as we’ve seen, she just doesn’t focus on more than what she can handle at a time. She always thinks in terms of breaking a problem down into steps. The first step was following up on those clues from Claridelune. The second step was finding Thorn. The last step was dealing with herself. 

Their relationship here, which has progressed in a way that felt natural and believable, is the most straightforward it has ever been. That made writing about them this time around kind of hard, actually, because it’s all plainly there in the text. For me, I think the notable takeaway is being able to mark just how far these two characters have come in their individual and mutual journeys. Now and together, they can tackle the gargantuan, perilous task ahead. It might all end on a bittersweet note. But for this couple…that seems about right, and I can’t wait to read the conclusion.

Thank you so much for reading these long posts and leaving such kind feedback! I’m glad that you, too, enjoy Ophelia, Thorn, and this magical series. 

[arcgeminga]

Romantic Headcanon Meme: 2-4, 9, 12, 16, 17, 20, 21, 23, 25, 26-29 (Aspros (lol obviously his ship with Manigoldo haha))

Romantic Headcanon Meme | AsupuMani (my OTP ❤️)

What my Muse admires about their love interest(s)

Hm... This is pretty hard to pin down for Aspros. In the most canon version, Aspros doesn't really realize he loves Manigoldo. Yes, he does have an attraction, but he doesn't realize that it's a 'love interest' sort of attraction. I don't even think he's consciously aware that he admires some parts of Manigoldo.

Metagaming tho, he admires Manigoldo's boisterous nature. It's like an attractive amount of cockiness and confidence that isn't too overpowering since Manigoldo can and will be humble should he need to be. It's just Manigoldo prefers to hide this part of himself.

I would also guess that Aspros unconsciously admires Manigoldo's respect for life and people from all walks of life? I feel like Manigoldo, from what I gathered in his gaiden, doesn't really hold things against people. like, he even said something along the lines of "The world isn't there to satisfy selfish people, but even then, I don't hate those kinds of people". And he says it with a smile. So I'd think that Manigoldo isn't the type that judges people just because of how they are or where they came from. You treat him and his friends good, and he'll accept you how you are; if you're an enemy, he doesn't make a whole show about how you are. I think Aspros would unconsciously admire that greatly (especially if you take my headcanons of him being gay-leaning into account since it was loathed in the 1700s). This is hilarious since I'm sure after the assassination attempt, Aspros would have been enemy number 1 on Manigoldo's list.

What sort of daydreams / stray thoughts they have about their love interest(s)

Woof.... As you know, in my headcanons, Aspros is a romantic. I'm sure that the things that 'normal' couples can do in public, Aspros would have daydreams of. But, you know, since they're in a forbidden love, they would probably never do such things. But, also, if we're going with the close-to-canon-as-possible portrayal for this, I'm sure Aspros wouldn't even admit that he has such daydreams. Or, actually, I'm sure that he wouldn't be aware of having such thoughts. If he does catch himself having those thoughts, he would think that he's having a sexual craving rather than it being a romantic desire.

Their worries/insecurities regarding their love interest(s)

Oof... I don't think Aspros would be aware of any worries or insecurities. Aspros is a very guarded person and he's also a very selfish person. Especially since we're doing this post-corruption. Plus, I don't believe that Aspros would have a lot to worry about with Manigoldo. Taking inspiration from my previous RP partner that helped me develop the AsupuMani ship, Manigoldo is pretty loyal, and since Mani didn't have any prior relationship, he's pretty blinded by his first love.

I will say, the only thing that Aspros would be mildly concerned about is if Manigoldo manages to somehow see through his plan of seducing him. Like, Aspros *is* using Manigoldo in order to get an idea of how the Pope sees him and as a safety net of support for after he secures his position as pope. So if Manigoldo ends up seeing through his act, then it would undoubtedly lead to Manigoldo losing trust in him. And, out of everything, Aspros puts a lot of significance on loyalty and trust. So that's about the only thing I'd say that Aspros is concerned about, but it's a very mild concern.

Any physical/emotional/mental/spiritual feature(s) they find attractive

Oh woof... let's go down the list of prominent things then, shall we?

Physical: Muscles. /shrug/ As I said, my version of Aspros is gay, or rather gay-leaning. He's more attracted to the toned body of men than he is into the curves of a woman. I'll also say he's attracted to Manigoldo's smiles and grins? Because Manigoldo does have really cute smiles and smug grins, I feel like Aspros would unconsciously be weak for those. And, ofc, as a gay man, I don't think I need to say that he's attracted to... ahem. Other parts of the body...

Emotional: I feel like Aspros would find Manigoldo's empathy attractive. My version of Manigoldo is very empathetic (Cancer trait), so he'll understand how other people are feeling without needing to ask. But just as he is attracted to that part of Manigoldo, he's also very cautious of it since, because of that emotional reading, Aspros is aware of how much of a risk it is if Manigoldo manages to 'read' through his acting. So, it's an attraction to a double-edged sword.

Ways my Muse goes out of their way for their love interest(s)

I wouldn't doubt that Aspros is a partner that would take more than he gives, and Manigoldo would probably be satisfying giving more than he gets... but I do not think that Aspros would be an unfair sort of lover. Within the "love languages", Aspros definitely falls under 'acts of service' more than he falls under 'physical touch'. So Aspros would do things he knows would probably benefit Manigoldo. And should Manigoldo ask for his assistance, Aspros would grant it immediately. He would probably even do things in the background that would make Manigoldo's missions run smoother. He would even, perhaps, stick his neck out for Manigoldo a little more than he should. Not quite risking his position, but obviously in a way that would be rather uncharacteristic if anyone is paying attention close enough.

And the most hilarious thing about this is that 85% of the time, Aspros would be unconsciously committing these acts. Some things might be intentional, such as doing things in the background to aid Manigoldo, but the majority of them won't be.

My Muse’s kinks and how they would bring them up to their partners), if at all

hahahahehehehuahuahuahuhuhuhohoho

Hm... Well, I do have the kink that Aspros likes when his hair is pulled, he also has a thing for dirty talking too, especially if he's bottoming. There's also edging, both receiving and giving, I can see that being a part of his kink list. There are also some moments, especially when he's feeling upset, when he wants to ravish and/or wants to be ravished (in the CNC/rough sex way), but never anything that treads into BDSM... Another thing I can see is semi-public sex or the thrill of nearly being caught/being heard by others... Although that's more of a fantasy he has, I would say he still gets off at the idea of it.

But, ah, I'm very bad at this... I don't really know much more unless I explore it in drabbles (since my stories and headcanons write themselves, some things just pop up while I'm writing)...

How he'll bring it up? Communicating and just sharing the fantasy with Mani. Aspros isn't afraid of talking these things through, especially if it's important to talk it over first before getting into it. Although, for some things, I'd imagine he'll bring it up via dirty talk, just to see Manigoldo get agitated and aroused by the fantasies.

My Muse’s sexual fantasies regarding their partner(s)

Oh. Boy.

Can I just answer this by saying 'There's a lot'??? Because there is. Even with things that aren't really his kink, he fantasizes about because he's fascinated with Manigoldo's reaction before, during, and after the deed is done.

Any pet names my Muse has or would call their partner(s)

Hm... I don't think so? Aside from 'darling', 'beloved', 'love', so on... Things he thinks he doesn't mean.

How my Muse would comfort their partner

As I touched upon it before, Aspros' "love language' is 'acts of service' and 'physical affection''. If Manigoldo was ever upset, Aspros' way of comforting him would be to 'be of service' no matter how he's used, as well as physical affection such as hugs, cuddles, and kisses should it be needed. Of course, he'll do these things believing that if he were to be at Manigoldo's side during difficult times, it'll get Manigoldo to trust him blindly--not quite realizing that he himself is genuine in these acts.

My Muse’s thoughts on marriage and their position as a spouse

Oh ooohhhh... This is an interesting thought, especially since we're going with the close-to-canon portrayal for this ship.

I don't think Aspros ever thought upon marriage. I don't think he was ever interested in it, especially since, during his time, marriage was exclusive to a man and a woman. Or, rather, I don't think it'll ever be in his thoughts unless it was brought up by his partner, and his partner specifically. If it's brought up by anyone else, he'll probably brush it off, but if Manigoldo brought it up (like, perhaps a sexual fantasy where they're roleplaying the wedding night), he'll probably mull over the idea more than he should.

But I'd imagine that after he starts to think about it, it'll just be a daydream. Since, after all, it's unheard of to marry another man (for his time period). But I would think that, if he were to daydream about it without being a prick to himself, he wouldn't be against marriage to his partner. It would be a private/secret thing, but it would definitely satisfy a large romantic desire he wouldn't know he would be craving. He probably wouldn't think on it deeply since, a.) he doesn't want to believe in fantasies regarding a romantically fulfilled future (since, if you go with my headcanons, the last time he did that with Klaus, it hurt him terribly) b.) It's useless to think about such things unless it's a roleplay fantasy for bedroom activities.

Although, in the canon divergence on the successful assassination plot, I can see Aspros sort of coaxing Manigoldo into a pseudo-marriage. Using Manigoldo's emotional vulnerability to get him to vow to be by his side forever. Not officially a marriage, but something very similar to it and extremely private to just them two. That way he can keep a powerful saint by his side while also securing his partnership with Manigoldo (unconsciously fulfilling the romantic desire).

My Muse’s thoughts on their experience / skill in bed

Oh, he knows he's good. Before Manigoldo, he had a lot of sexual partners due to his sexual desires. Although, the number pales in comparison to Defteros' body count since Aspros doesn't seek out the company of harlots and stray men frequently. So he knows he's skilled in bed. But not like Manigoldo would notice (since Mani's first is Aspros, a headcanon I will take to my grave).

My Muse’s favorite part about having sex with their partner(s)

Hm... Well, I mentioned it before, but Manigoldo's reactions before, during, and after sex would be Aspros' favorite things... but Aspros also loves to hear his partner too, from moans to growls to screams. Plus, I would imagine, although Aspros had a list of sexual partners before Manigoldo, I'm sure he wasn't too emotionally invested in them. So, when he does it with Manigoldo, because he's unconsciously emotionally attached, it would just feel a lot more fulfilling. So he'll just like it more overall when it is his partner.

My Muse’s go-to gift or treat for their significant other(s)

Hmm!! I honestly haven't thought about it...

I would think that expensive things would be a go-to? I mean, after all, Aspros is of the mindset that the wealthiest of people will show off their wealth by buying high-quality and rare items. I would imagine that, in order to lavish his partner, he'll buy things like expensive clothing and jewelry. Especially something that isn't straightforwardly a romantic item, so that they can keep their relationship a secret.

My Muse’s favorite way to spoil and/or pleasure their partner(s)

lmao, you mean something other than smoldering his partner with kisses and dragging them to bed to have sex? Honestly, for spoiling, probably cuddles, treats out to restaurants, lavishing with expensive goods... pleasuring his partner? Hm... anything sexual, I guess, but also entertaining emotional needs as well, even if he thinks he isn't involved too heavily in it. He would say words of affection as well if he knew that his partner needs to hear such things, but he wouldn't ever say "I love you", because--as far as he's aware--he doesn't love his partner (at least until a second before he dies when he realizes that he actually does, but by then it'd be already too late).

My Muse’s preferred method of being spoiled / pleasured by their partner(s)

lmao, you mean something other than being smoldered by kisses and getting dragged into bed to have sex? For being spoiled, Aspros loves head scratches. His scalp is pretty sensitive (like Defteros'), and he absolutely loves it when a hand runs through his hair and rubs his scalp. It turns him into a docile creature (or an aroused docile creature), but not a lot of people know about that. Pleasure? Definitely any sexual act. Also, while he wouldn't be aware of it, but hearing words of affection would bring him pleasure in an emotional sense. Especially, as ironic as this is, the "I love you" words. He'd see it as him successfully tricking Manigoldo into an emotionally secure place, but he wouldn't realize that he craves to hear those words (another romantic desire he wouldn't realize he has).

[thenamesseven]

Word count: 2.7k

Warnings: Jae getting a bit...Naughty xD

A/N: Hey! New chapter here! I just wanted to ask you all a question, are you guys still interested in this story? Each chapter is getting less and less notes and I feel like it is not interesting anymore, I would like you all to answer sincerely so I know if I should keep updating it or not! Thank you and enjoy the chapter! ^^

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Scoffing, Jaebum kicked a little stone that was on the ground as he walked outside of the building, hands in his pockets and eyes down as thousands of thoughts ran back and forward in his mind. He would have never thought things would turn out to be more difficult than he expected, at the beginning his task seemed to be incredibly easy, one that anybody could have done. You were single, he was fairly attractive and showing interest in you, he had been more than clear when it came to the kind of relationship he wanted to develop between the two of you.

But stupid Yugyeom had to show up and screw everything.

What did he have that he didn’t anyways? Jaebum was older than you, something girls definitely liked. In his opinion, he looked more mature and as a consequence he also looked slightly more attractive. Jaebum also had this kind of bad boy aura, the one people who weren't afraid of breaking the rules had while Yugyeom looked like somebody who could have never broken a plate. Those were the worst kind of guys, it wouldn’t surprise Jaebum if he stabbed you on the back as soon as he got tired of you or as soon as he got what he wanted from you.

Let’s see if he stays around when that project the two of you had was finished. Jaebum was ready to bet all his money on Yugyeom vanishing.

Since he didn’t have any money on him he decided his best option would be walking all the way back to your apartment, it wasn’t too far but it wasn’t close either, walking around would help clear his mind hopefully, maybe that was exactly what he needed. His eyes landed on Youngjae as he looked around, another sigh leaving his lips when he realized how the male discreetly tried avoiding him as soon as he realized Jaebum was by himself. He was going to ignore him, Jaebum wasn’t a huge fan of your neighbor either but he then remembered Yugyeom mentioning him and his plans quickly changed.

“Youngjae!” He called out so he would wait for him, Jaebum increased his pace in order to not make him wait too much, Youngjae already looked uneasy, he didn’t need to make things worse for him “Hey man, already on your way home?” He asked

Youngjae, being the nice person he was, nodded innocently, gesturing to the bus stop “Yeah, I’m already done with classes for today” Both males started walking, pace slow but fast enough to get to their destination in time.

“Mind paying for me? (Y/N) is busy and I don’t have any money right now, I’ll give you the money as soon as we get home” Jaebum asked, perfectly knowing the other wouldn’t say no to him.

“Sure” Youngjae didn’t sound too excited about his new bus partner, not because he didn’t like Jaebum but more because he was lowkey scared of him. “I thought you would stay around with (Y/N) for the entire day?” He asked curiously, glancing at him as they both stopped by the bus stop, hands in their pockets.

“Nah, she can concentrate better without me around” Jaebum forced a confident yet fake smirk on his lips that Youngjae obviously believed, quickly catching the insinuation on the male’s tone, making his cheeks turn slightly pink “But yeah, she and this Yugyeom guy were really busy talking about this upcoming project and I didn’t want to bother them”

“Oh! Yugyeom? I’m glad he managed to get paired up with her for this, he was really looking forward to working with (Y/N)” Youngjae said with a more relaxed smile on his lips.

The bus stopped in front of them and Jaebum took his chance to stay quiet, letting Youngjae walk in first, pay for their tickets and choose seats that would allow the both of them to sit together for the whole ride “Was he? Does he like her or something like that?” Maybe his question had been a bit too direct but honestly? He didn’t know how else to ask.

“I don’t think so?” Youngjae said, sitting right next to the window, looking at Jaebum as he sat down besides him “I mean, Yugyeom is not the kind of guy who goes after somebody that’s already taken” He said trying to reassure Jaebum about it but again, the two of them were bestfriends and he didn’t know if Youngjae’s opinion was completely neutral.

“He better don’t” Jaebum muttered under his breath, leaning back against the seat as he kept his eyes forward “Why is he so excited about being paired up with her though?” 

“I mean, (Y/N) is really good at what she does” Youngjae admitted with a shy smile, which twitched slightly when the other male turned on his seat and looked at him with an arched eyebrow “I-I mean, she sometimes doesn’t use headphones when she works and plays music really loudly” He quickly added, panicking at the thought of Jaebum thinking about him trying to seduce his girlfriend “If some songs that I’ve heard are hers, I can understand why Yugyeom would want to work with her” Youngjae shrugged, dragging his eyes away from his seatmate to focus on the road “Besides she’s really nice and responsible, everybody likes her” 

“Everybody?” 

“(Y/N) is a very likable person, it’s just...Her nature, you know?” 

“So I shouldn’t really worry about the crush my girlfriend used to have on Yugyeom right?” Jaebum asked, making Youngjae chuckle softly. By your reaction earlier he had easily guessed everyone knew about your feelings towards Yugyeom but you were too oblivious to realize just how obvious you were actually being.

“I guess not” Youngjae shrugged “Yugyeom has always kind of known, like, I’ve heard him comment how cute she always acts around him and how flustered she used to become when he was around but Yugs never acted on it, I doubt he will try to date her now that he knows you are her boyfriend”

“So you’re telling me he knew she had a crush on him and never said anything?” Jaebum frowned at the information he had just been given. If he was always so sweet and nice with you, if he had always been interested then why wouldn’t he have asked you out?

You know why? Because he was just leading you on.

Youngjae shrugged, not really wanting to talk bad about his best friend “If he knew, he never told me”

“What an asshole” He muttered under his breath, shaking his head as he glanced down at the rings in his hands, playing with them when it was time to bring up another subject, something that would surely make him embarrassed but it was time to admit he needed help, Jaebum couldn’t figure this out by his own and getting some advice would definitely help.

“I kind of need your help for something” Jaebum suddenly said, breaking the small silence that had settled down between the two of them. He slightly turned in his bus seat, facing Youngjae and ignoring some of the curious eyes that darted their way when they noticed the change in Jaebum’s tone.

“Me?” Youngjae asked, unable to hide the surprise in his expression. “I thought we...Like….Uh…” He was about to confess how he thought Jaebum hated him but preferred to stay quiet, not willing to screw this sudden friendly behaviour he was showing “What do you need my help for?”

“You know, when I lived abroad our relationship was more…” Jaebum stayed quiet thinking for the right words to describe something that never existed in the first place, a small frown appeared on his forehead, how was he supposed to explain all to Youngjae based on lies? “Passionate?” He asked himself, frown becoming deeper since he didn’t even know what he was exactly trying to explain “But now that I’ve showed up here and we live in the same place it’s all constant arguments and mood swings” He sighed as if he was desperate “Like there are moments when I think she’s going to kiss my soul out of me and then, seconds later, she looks like she’s about to slap me”

Youngjae looked at him dumbfounded, not really believing Jaebum was telling him that kind of information about the relationship he shared with you when the two of them hadn’t even shared a few hours together, hell, Youngjae thought Jaebum hated him this morning.

“What do you think I can do to make things a bit smoother between us?” Jaebum asked when Youngjae simply kept staring at him, shocked and surprised, his silence was honestly making him even more frustrated.

“Uh...What does (Y/N) like? Maybe buy her presents?” Jaebum scoffed obviously not happy with that reply, even when he had not even spent more than seventy two hours with you, he knew you weren’t the type of girl that was easily bought with those materialistic gestures. By the few conversations he had shared with you and the books he had spotted in your room, you were more of a romantic, someone who preferred being guided by feelings and not logic or greed.

You were a complicated one.

“That’s not going to make things better, trust me” He replied sighing, leaning his head back against the bus seat so he could stare at the ceiling. The bus would soon arrive to the apartment’s building and Jaebum was still as clueless as he was when he got out of the cafeteria before.

“What you need is to get back that spark, your relationship has turned dull, comfortable now that the two of you live together and you need to spice things up once again” Jaebum turned around, shocked when he found an old man sitting there. The smile on his face said he wasn’t making fun of him, that he was simply trying to help but Jaebum couldn’t help but feel slightly embarrassed that somebody else now knew he was incredibly lost when it came to relationships “Trust me young man, it worked with my marriage and I’ve been married for almost fifty five years with my Inhye” 

“Fifty-five?” Jaebum asked surprised, hope resurfacing in his chest “So I just have to spice things up a little and everything will go back to being fine?” He asked, ignoring the way Youngjae started frowning besides him, he obviously disagreed with what the old man was saying but Jaebum knew someone as nice as Youngjae probably didn’t even know what spice up meant.

“Spoil her with attention and passion, show her you love her” Jaebum’s smile twitched when he heard those words, he kept his smile up though, afraid the people surrounding him would be able to see through his façade. Everyone would surely call him a hypocrite for criticizing Yugyeom when he was doing something similar.

Love was something that didn’t exist for Jaebum, it wasn’t in his nature to have those kinds of feelings in him. There was a time when he was human, when he also had stupid crushes like yours on girls that would have never noticed him, he also experienced heartbreaks well enough to know how hurt you would be if you knew why Yugyeom was being so nice and sweet, you were useful for him, you could make things easier in his life and you were silly enough to trust him blindly.

“Thanks for the advice, I’ll definitely do that” Jaebum said, standing up with Youngjae once the bus stopped. The old man reached out to pat his back, nodding and cheering for him enthusiastically while he walked out.

Jaebum still didn’t have a game plan but at least, he had a slight idea of what he would have to do now.

After attending your classes, having a quick lunch in a place nearby campus and working your entire shift in the coffee shop close to your university you were finally standing in front of your apartment’s door. A regular person would be completely happy and relaxed, content now that they could get rid of the uncomfortable clothes they were getting, take a shower and get some dinner before going to bed. You weren’t ordinary and you wouldn’t be able to relax as soon as you walked through that door.

By the soft music you could hear from your side of the door, you knew Jaebum was waiting for you inside. Doing what? You didn’t know but you just hoped he wasn’t in a mood as bad as the one he was in when he walked away during lunch period. You would have contacted him earlier, tried to talk things out to really find out what his problem was but since you didn’t even know if he had a mobile phone you couldn’t call him.

You gasped when you opened the door, surprised to see Jaebum was standing there. You hoped he had heard you coming up the stairs instead of waiting there for the entire afternoon because that would have surely been incredibly tiring. Opening your mouth to greet him, you were instantly silenced when he reached out and grabbed your wrist, pulling you closer to his body and allowing himself to embrace you with his arms.

What was going on?

“Uhm...Hello?” You said trying to look up at him, voice hesitant as Jaebum only pulled you closer to him. A soft blush appeared on your cheeks when you felt your breasts being squeezed against his hard chest, he was too close for your liking “What did you break?”

“Why would I break something?” He asked, instantly leaning back to look into your eyes 

“I don’t know, being all lovely is what kids do when they’ve done something their mother is going to ground them for”

You couldn’t have known this but your words were pretty insulting for Jaebum’s ego. First you ignore him for some kind of guy that was obviously using you to get good marks and now, after he had gone through the efforts of preparing the romantic dinner that awaited you in the living room, you refer to him as a kid? Out of nowhere like that?

Jaebum spun the two of you around, making your back meet the front door with a soft thud. Like the night the two of you met, he kept his body pressed against yours, not letting you move away. Your hands instantly flew up to his chest, keeping a little and not enough for you space between the both of you.

“J-Jae?” The nickname slipped past your lips in a desperate attempt to get his attention, but the intense gaze in his eyes told you Jaebum was really set on doing whatever he was planning to do and that he wouldn’t back down now that he had you where he wanted

“I’m not a kid (Y/N)” He said quietly, his tone so low and husky that a shiver ran down your spine. He looked so different from the innocent Jaebum you’ve been with this morning, he wasn’t the same person, in fact, he looked like a predator hunting down the prey his been after for too long “And I would strongly advised you to change that attitude because my patience is running thin” His head moved lower, lips brushing against yours in a tempting way, making your heart pound against your chest.

“What are you…?”

Jaebum proceeded to dig his face into your neck, running his nose against the sensitive skin in order to shut you up “I’m saying you’re mine and it’s about time you act like it” He whispered, breath tickling your earlobe as he moved his mouth up, teasing you with each warm breath he took “After all, I’m sure you’re smart enough to figure out what happens to bad girls, mhm?” Your face was absolutely red at this point, flustered was an understatement for how you felt 

“I won’t play your games Jaebum” You warned, trying to sound as serious as you could, attempting to hide the trembling in your words

Jaebum scoffed ignoring you, shaking his head before he gently placed his forehead against yours “Bad girls get punished babygirl” He whispered, his hand snaking up your arm and towards your neck “And you don’t want to tempt me, trust me”

Taglist: @gold--gucciempress​ @harringtonsblackgf​

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #371

“some of those that work forces are the same that burn crosses”

What is one song you feel as though you sing particularly well, if any? Probably none, lol. What was the last lengthy task you completed? I love these unique questions I've had lately, but damn, are a lot of my answers "I don't know," lol. What type of photography do you enjoy looking at? Do you take any photos yourself, and if so, what types of things do you prefer to photograph? I love floral and wildlife photography. Landscapes, too, and I have a great fondness for boudoir for reasons I've mentioned in previous surveys. I like taking nature pictures, mainly. Have you ever gone out for the Black Friday shopping rush? Did you enjoy it, or not so much? Or, what’s the busiest shopping day you’ve ever experienced? Hell no, that's a hard pass. I'm sure the busiest shopping experience I've had was like at the mall or something around Christmas, idk. Do you enjoy reading diaries or stories you wrote from when you were younger, or does it embarrass you? If you’ve kept them, was there a particular reason for hanging on to them so long? NO. I DON'T. BECAUSE I CRINGE INTO ANOTHER DIMENSION. I keep a lot of it for memory's sake, but goddamn, is it always embarrassing. What would you say was your first true hobby? What about your most recently developed one? Um... the first thing I really remember is video games. I played Spyro like, a LOT, along with other childhood games. I was just really into gaming at a young age. Is there one thing that throws off your mood more than others, whether it be lack of sleep, lack of food, heat/cold, etc., and when was the last time you felt especially cranky? THE HEAT. I become so irritable. I was needlessly cranky a few days ago for whatever reason. What kinds of things are you likely to complain about? My legs hurting, more than anything. Also being hot. Do you like to put any extra effort into your food in terms of presentation, or do you prefer to just put it on a plate and eat it as it is, no frills? Ha, no. It's not gonna look fancy in my stomach, so whatever. Have you ever dated someone who had kids? No, and I very much doubt I ever would. Are there any candles in the room with you? No. Does the last person you kissed have tattoos? No, but I tell her all the time that dainty nature tattoos would be THE most beautiful on her. When was the last time someone called you pretty? I think when I last updated my Facebook profile picture. Do you like the color pink? It's my favorite! Does your cell phone have a case on it? What color? It came with this thin purple one. What was the last song you had on repeat? "Moon Baby" by Godsmack. Ever kissed someone your parents hated? No. Your most recent ex says he/she hates you, you say? I wouldn't *say* anything, I'd break down sobbing. Would you feel hurt if your last ex was in a relationship? No. Have you ever had to choose between two people? Yes: Jason and Juan. Juan and I dated for less than a day not all that long before Jason and I got together, and Juan was pretty upset. He was nooot a fan of Jason due to a shared ex-girlfriend. Jason, meanwhile, just didn't care. What is the saddest thing that has happened to you? What about the happiest? I think the saddest thing has to be my breakup, especially when you know just how madly in love I was with him and had endless trust that he would never leave, and then he was gone in a flash one night. The happiest is, in turn, my recovery from said split. I found strength in myself and felt hope for once as I learned coping mechanics and got a psychiatrist that was worth a shit in my partial hospitalization program. What was the last new drink you discovered that was delicious? *shrug* Do you have a YouTube channel? Yes. I don't make videos anymore, though. Were you happy as a teenager? God no, my depression was awful. What do you do for your mom on Mother’s Day? Sigh. Not enough. I just tell her happy Mother's Day, give her a hug, and try to be an extra good daughter. Do you know anyone who follows a raw vegan diet and lifestyle? No. Can you go see a doctor alone or do you like to take someone with you? I can do it alone (but only have once), but I like to bring my mom with me still. Would you have sex with someone of the same gender as you? I'm bi, so. Have you ever had a concussion? One or two, I can't remember. How many dresses do you own? Zero. Do you know anyone who has a pet gecko? Yeah, my friend Summer has a darling leopard gecko. I want oneeeeee. They look so damn derpy and adorable, and their chill demeanor is something I really like in pets. Would you ever go bear hunting? No. Absolutely never. Do you prefer drawing or painting? Any particular reason why? Drawing, for sure. At least you can erase stuff, and paint is just so messy. Do you like raisins? NO THANKS MAN. Do you remember your locker combinations from high school? Nope. Do you forget to flip the page of your calendar at the start of each month? I don't have a calendar. Are you racist to any race? Nope. Have you ever intentionally hurt an animal? I've given cats and dogs a small pop on the rear, but nothing more than that. I hate doing even that, but with the language barrier and all, sometimes it's the only way to get your point across. Do you own any autographed memorabilia? No. Have you ever dated a twin? No. Oreos or Chips Ahoy? Oreos. Have you ever considered being a cop? Yeah, no thank you. What’s your favorite superhero movie? Maybe Logan. I thought it was very emotional and just overall a good movie. Name somebody you know who deserves a better life than they have: MY MOM. Name something that you’re good at but don’t like: uhhhhhhhh Name something that you’re bad at but DO like: Dancing, maybe. Which is worse: Stale chips or flat soda? Stale chips, for sure. It's certainly not my preference, but I can drink flat soda. Who’s the hottest guy and hottest girl out there? M-Mark Fischbach. :') Girl... let's seeeeee... maybe Alissa White-Gluz from Arch Enemy. GodDAMN what a WOMAN. ❤_❤ Do you ever trip over your pets? Yes, because he just looooves to follow me at my feet. What’s your relationship like with your exes? Aaron, Juan, Jason, and Tyler: nonexistent. Sara and Girt: great. What was the last thing you turned down doing? Going to my nephew's t-ball game. I always feel bad when I say no when Mom asks if I wanna go... but at least the kids know I just don't handle the heat well. Are you a party animal? Faaaaar from it, my friend. Who are you the biggest fan of? m-m-m-mMARKIPLIER You’re DJ for the night - first track to get everyone going? Uhhhh maybe "Party Hard" by Andrew W.K.? Have you ever been hit on by a pushy person? I think Juan was kinda pushy, but not to an uncomfortable degree. He respected what I felt. What accent do you find attractive? Most attractive, British. But I also really like Scottish and Irish. Also French accents in women I tend to find very beautiful-sounding. Have you ever had feelings for a friend's partner? Yes. What’s your favorite thing to do that doesn’t cost much? Drive around take pictures, maybe? Let's, uh, ignore the whole gas crisis in this answer. When in danger are you more fight or flight? Flight. Do you feel self conscious about a certain body part? *gestures to entire body* Have you been accused of being manipulative? Yes. Have you ever considered violence to solve your problem? No. Are you romantic? I personally think so. If you are a smoker, how long does a pack typically last you? If you aren’t a smoker, does anybody you are close to smoke, & if so, are you against the fact that they’re a smoker? I don't smoke. To answer the next part, yes, like my dad and stepmom. I wish they would stop so badly, like it's literally going to kill them both. Do you have more subscribers or more people that you are subscribed to? On YouTube? I'm definitely subscribed to waaay more people. Is there anything that has been drilled into your brain since you were young & you finally decided to stop listening to? How did it feel once you decided to listen to yourself over what you were told? Yes: "finish your plate." Teaching your kid to eat beyond their comfort can be very destructive, and I'm glad I never stuck to that once Mom stopped enforcing it. If you are currently in a relationship, what is one thing that seems to be unique or different about your relationship with this person, compared to other relationships in general? If you are currently single, is this more of a choice or is it more just the way things are going, not really something you chose? If you are neither “single” or officially in a relationship, what are your feelings on your current situation? I'm single, and it's just how it is. I know realistically I wouldn't tell what felt like the right person no, but it really is probably better that I stay single and keep figuring my shit out. Think of somebody famous that you have a lot of respect for. What is something that you really admire them for? To name just one thing I admire in Mark, his relentless "I'm going to do this no matter what" attitude is very inspirational to me. He lets like... n-o-t-h-i-n-g get in his way. If somebody were to leave a harsh comment on a survey you took, judging you on one of your opinions, how would you react? I'd get pretty self-conscious, just because I in general take judgment quite poorly. I obsess over "what if they're right, and you're just an idiot?". Are there any other sites you use to find surveys to take? What sites do you use? I mainly use Tumblr and LiveJournal, but in times of great desperation, I'll use Bzoink and just google surveys as well, haha. Have you sent or received any friend requests on Facebook lately? Not sent, but I got one from someone I had no mutual friends with the other day. Safe to say I declined it. Can you recall the last time you turned down an offer, of any kind? Uhhhhh no. Which fruit would you say you eat the most often? Apples. What was your pet’s last vet visit concerning? Roman has been to the vet once to get neutered (and I think shots?). I took Venus many years ago because I thought she had a respiratory infection. Thank god, she didn't. Which animals do you tend to go check out first at pet stores? The reptiles, snakes in particular. Have you ever been a victim of a house fire? No. What’s the longest you’ve ever had to wait before being seated at a restaurant? Like, over an hour. Have you ever had a cavity before? How about a root canal? A tooth pulled? Braces? Cavities and braces, yes. What is your favorite zoo animal that you would like to set free? Probably polar bears. Like especially here, it gets so hot in the summer, and the poor things sometimes only have a bit of snow in the shade. Like... they can't be very happy. Especially when you see those videos of them playing in snow, and then you think about situations like our zoo here... ugh. What kinds of artifacts fascinate you? I really think old figurines built with like clay and stuff are cool. But all artifacts I find to be very intriguing. It's so interesting to see that the desire to create has always been with us as a species. Is there anyone that you’ve visited in jail? No.

[whitewolfofwinterfell]

Are u more bangel or cangel?

Would you believe me if I said I’m an even 50/50 split? In fact, I’m not even that. I love all three of Angel’s ships - Dangel, Bangel and Cangel - and consider them all to be OTPs. So I guess I’m a 33.333333% split between the three haha.

I couldn’t rank them or choose one as my favourite above the others, because I love them all for completely different reasons and appreciate that they represent different stages of Angel’s life and development. Darla was Angel’s creator, his partner in death, the person that shaped and defined him and was the mother of his child. Buffy was Angel’s first love, the one that showed him what it meant to love and be loved, and what it meant to fight with a purpose. Cordelia was Angel’s best friend and confidante, his constant and main source of support. Each of them brought something entirely different to Angel’s life and were vital to him. 

Overall, I strongly dislike comparing Bangel and Cangel, because for me, they’re incomparable. I’ve spoken about this in a previous post:

People have a tendency to make comparisons between the Angel/Cordelia and Buffy/Angel relationships, when in reality (as I’ve mentioned above) the two aren’t really comparable. Angel’s relationships with Buffy and Cordelia were distinctive, took place under completely different circumstances and brought different things to his life. Angel was fully engaged in a romantic relationship with Buffy for 2 years (on and off), but he never had the opportunity to do that with Cordelia. The romantic feelings were there, as was the potential for them to act on that and see what they could be, but it didn’t happen. So to compare the two relationships (when technically Angel and Cordy never entered into a romantic relationship) is futile to say the least.

If you want to read more about this, you can find the full meta here. Skip to point 9 if you specifically want to read about Bangel and Cangel. 

I stand by the last point - comparing the two relationships is futile because they’re so different. Bangel was a more romantic and sexual relationship than Cangel, whose relationship was rooted in friendship and companionship. On the surface, this makes Bangel seem like the preferential ship, but not everything has to be about sexual attraction. Deep, intense romantic love can exist without an underlying and dominating sexual attraction. Futhermore, Angel’s curse made a romantic-sexual relationship difficult to pursue (this is a large part of what drove Bangel apart - the risk of him losing his soul and their struggle to resist each other sexually, amongst other things). I also headcanon Cordy as ace so the fact that the sexual aspect of Cangel’s relationship wasn’t as developed never bothered me. It made sense for Angel and Cordy to fall for each other and pursue the kind of relationship they had with each other, when considering the context of their previous relationships and them as characters. 

Another reason it’s futile to compare the two is because Bangel had a lot more advantages than Cangel. Bangel had a much higher standard of writing in canon, SMG and David’s chemistry was incredible and they had a fully realised and fleshed out romantic relationship across 3 seasons. In comparison, Cangel were never fully realised as a romantic ship, were repeatedly done a disservice and halted in their progress any time they even tried to explore their romantic feelings for each other. 

Furthermore, the two relationships were fundamentally two different types of love. Bangel was very typical of first love - it was immediate, intense, spiritual, angsty and steeped in sexual attraction. Their connection was built more on spiritual connection and magnetic attraction than anything else. Cangel’s connection was more mature and developed over time as a consequence of spending time together. It wasn’t love at first sight, it was an evolution of friendship to family to romance which developed from being so intimately and closely involved in each other’s lives; sharing a home, work, purpose, emotions etc. 

Overall, I love Bangel and Cangel equally, but my love for each of them exists for different reasons and fluctuates at different points. On BtVS, my heart is 100% for Bangel; on AtS, my heart is 100% for Cangel. I prefer Bangel’s chemistry and story; I’m more emotionally invested in Cangel’s because of the disservice that was done to them. I love giffing both; I make more Cangel edits because they have a smaller fandom. I love the epic star-crossed lovers trope that Bangel have; I have more appreciation of the “realness” and groundedness of Cangel’s love. I find enjoyment and validation in the Buffyverse fandom because of the love Bangel get; I feel very protective of Cangel in the fandom because they seem to be forgotten, misunderstood and/or reduced to living in Bangel’s shadow. I prefer canon for Bangel; I yearn for the potential that Cangel had in canon. I enjoy the gratification of Bangel’s love at first sight relationship; I connect more with the slow-burn and development of Cangel’s relationship. I live for the angst of Bangel; I enjoy the more lighthearted tone of Cangel (up until s4 at least lol). I love the intruige of Angelus and Bangel in BtVS; I freakin’ adore the Angel we see with Cordelia in AtS. I love watching Bangel’s sexual attraction and chemistry; I find it refreshing that Cangel’s relationship is somewhat separated from sex.  

I’m sure when you asked this question you didn’t bargain for an essay, but if you know me, you would’ve known to expect this since I can never give simple one word answers to any question I’m asked haha. To summarise: I love Bangel and Cangel equally but in different ways because of the fundamental differences in their relationships and how they were written. 

[itsclydebitches]

Do you have anything to say on the romances in Rwby because in my opinion they’re all pretty bad but I don’t know if that’s just because I don’t like romance or the writing is actually bad.

A summary! (I’m ignoring the previous generation ships like Tai/Summer and Tai/Raven just because we know so little about them.) 

Ren/Nora - I’ve always liked them as a couple in the way I like simple, wholesome relationships that I never expected to develop in any remarkable manner. Ren and Nora were basically a couple when we first met them, to the point where a lot of fans (myself included) were a bit confused regarding if that was actually the case, if not when might they admit their rather obvious feelings, if hand-holding in the RWBY universe was meant to be a stand-in for a fully established relationship, etc. It was only last year when things started changing a bit (Nora referring to Ren as “my man”) and this year when they actually kissed that it became clear their relationship still had somewhere to go. Suddenly, renora wasn’t the super simple, opposites-attract love we’d gotten used to but something a little more complicated they still had to work out. My only problem with that is how RT has handled it so far. Whatever fears Ren had regarding their relationship were ignored in favor of a non-consensual kiss. Ren is apparently so distraught by where their relationship currently stands that merely seeing Neo-as-Nora causes him to cry. Yet instead of making any space for these issues or handling them sensitively, the story (thus far) has ignored them and prioritized saying “Look they’re a couple! Couples dramatically kiss!”  over tackling the difficulties the show has now introduced. As with much in RWBY, I think they would have been better served to keep things simple. The renora relationship was “good” in as much as it was comfortingly straightforward and adorable (imo) to watch. Now there’s potential to mess things up, but we’ll obviously have to see where it goes. 

Saphron/Terra - A lot like renora in that they’re established (what renora was presumed to be at the start) and are very happy together. They hold hands. Raise a kid. Occasionally exchange glances that speak to a very long time spent together. And they’re queer!! I like them a lot. Again, very simple and straightforward which, at this point, is what I think RWBY does best. 

Jaune/Pyrrha - Fine, I guess, provided we’re taking into account the fact that they never actually had a relationship. They each had a crush on the other that culminated in one kiss before Pyrrha died. With the exception of their head-on-Jaune’s-shoulder talk (which I quite liked) there was no romance. Jaune’s story was focused on him overcoming his bullying/ineptitude/leadership woes. Pyrrha’s story was focused on becoming the Fall Maiden. They overlapped primarily through Pyrrha training him and Jaune revealing his fake transcripts. There were absolutely hints - Pyrrha trying to get Jaune’s attention early on, Nora realizing she shouldn’t interrupt them, etc. - but by the time we actually got to the romance Pyrrha had been killed. Which, notably, is an easy way to do a “good” relationship: just don’t provide one and let the audience fill that space in with their personal “What if”s. Arkos is the “perfect” relationship because we never actually got to see it unfold. Pyrrha is forever a heroic martyr. Jaune will forever mourn her. The audience is forever imagining the adorable, epic, steamy scenes we could have gotten. Which we didn’t. You can’t ruin a ship when the ship is never actually depicted on screen and a depicted relationship can’t compete with whatever fans imagine in their headcanons. Arkos is popular in part because it was written out of the story, leaving everyone to engage only their preferred romance for them. 

Yang/Blake - Not canon yet, which is its biggest issue imo. Unlike a lot of other fans I don’t think their relationship has necessarily been “rushed.” Once Yang pulled Blake aside to confront her they’ve had a very close, ongoing friendship, with their status as partners acting as filler. Has it been perfect? No. Could RWBY have done more in the early volumes to make them even closer and tackle some of the tension between them (such as Blake being wary of Yang after her framing)? Yes. But I can see how RT is trying to develop the relationship in recent volumes and I respect that work alongside the numerous moments of coding we’ve gotten: hand holding, blushing, flirty dialogue, etc. The problem is it’s not actually a relationship yet. It’s not canon. It’s fine to have Blake and Yang at the very start of a romance, only just moving away from being friends, but we need an overt acknowledgement of that, both because of the queer aspect and so that we avoid the confusion we saw with Ren/Nora. In addition, in volume 6 and 7 I greatly dislike how attached at the hip Blake and Yang are without that relationship being canonical. I’ve seen a lot of fans defend their extreme attachment as them being in the “honeymoon phase,” AKA so in love it only make sense that they’d never want to be separated. But the story hasn’t taken the plunge to actually say they’re in love (and when I’ve got endless asks insisting that hand-holding means nothing, yes, that overt representation is necessary). So, canonically, that just leaves us with two women, one of whom has a history of anger management issues and the other a history of running away, both with extreme fears of abandonment, getting mad when someone suggests they team up with someone else and conspiring against a general without the rest of their team’s input. Within the context of the show - not the impression fans want to get from the text - all this does is tell us that Blake and Yang are unhealthily co-dependent, clinging too tightly after Adam’s death and trying to function as their own, autonomous unit, none of which the show acknowledges. What it doesn’t tell us is, “Look how wonderfully in love Yang and Blake are.” Because, again, that romantic love doesn’t yet exist. If RT makes them canonical then we can revise our interpretation of a lot of these scenes, asking how much of this is justified by two young women being head over heels for once another. But until then RT has left us in the lurch. 

[mr-kamiyama]

A Word for Zoomers Who're Told They're "Making Up" Genders and Orientations.

I'm an Xer.

Well, actually I'm in that b.1977-85 throe where no two people can agree what I am. I'm Post Dankai Junior in the old country, but I was too old to be a kid for Pokémon, Harry Potter, I caught Digimon 02 during its premiere US run a rare Saturday the firm I worked at, that normally had Saturday hours, was closed. I met Windows Millennium Edition because a housemate, as back then, I'd realised I wanted to live with company, wanted to upgrade our computer to the newest version of Windows (and I promptly made AMVs using GIFs and lost them to the sands of time all before YouTube even existed) So that gives you an idea of my age.

I came out for the first time in high school. I came out as bi.

In Japan, transness, like here had different words we no longer use, but unlike here, wasn't a secret.

If I'd stayed in Japan just one more year, in '95 politician Kamikawa Aya began advocating on NHK for trans rights.

Maybe I'd've learned that transition *to* male and actual medical treatment like HRT to make that possible existed a whole lot sooner.

But I didn't. And so, I didn't realise it was actually something I could *do* and I wasn't doomed to be stuck until about 2010.

I claimed "bi" in the '90s, and mistook "you're a really cool person and really nice to me when few people are and so I really like you in a platonic sense" +aesthetic attraction for crushes of a romantic and sexual nature.

The SAM model was developed by bi people in the '70s, but where and when I was, there weren't exactly highly visible LGBT centres where I could learn this. So I thought any orientation had to be "x-sexual"

And I only knew about straight, gay/lesbian, and bi.

Which, the term "laaaaaaaabelllls" was coined by biphobic people my age. See, we weren't like people today, who literally can't live because of unfettered crony capitalism. You could get a nice studio on the nice side of town for eight days' work at minimum wage (of course, being POC, you had to find the right realtor), which back then was under four dollars an hour. You could get a 2br/1.5ba rowhouse for about two weeks' worth, which is half a month, but these days, that much work will get you a barely-studio in shoot-you-in-the-face-in-broad-daylight territory.

But we were still plenty suspicious of marketing. So queerphobic Xers went "don't make me acknowledge your filthy non-mono sexuality! What if I told you naming what you are is dehumanising, like labelling a jar of mayo, and you're the product!"

Which is no different that queerphobic Millennials claiming "Queer is a slur uwu call it gay because cisgay and cishet are the only valid IDs uwu Gay has never ever been used as a pejorative uwu"

Which is also bunk because back in the '90s, if one young man did ANYTHING another didn't like, the other one could call it and him "gaaayyy" and that would be a homophobic attack via toxic masculinity on the first young man. Heck, I don't listen to much grunge, though I did at the time, but it's used this way in some Nirvana song. I just can't remember which one.

Anyway, so I claimed bi and spent the next 23 or so years fighting for it even against physical violence to make me claim something in the false straight/gay binary

All along, I thought "the mushy stuff squicks me because I'm a guy (insert ways I justified things before I realised that yes, I actually am male for prior to 2010)" which, yeah, I'm still sorting through the myriad manifestations of toxic masculinity and learning to spot them. What that actually is is romance repulsion.

I'm actually aroace.

To go further, I actually have very strong platonic affection feelings, and "idemromantic" is not necessarily my actual identity, but that, and at least some idea, if even wrong, that the other party was interested, was how I sorted whether I should approach the other person as "friend" or "potential partner" subconsciously.

Plus to further complicate things, I'm sex-favourable ace/cupiosexual, which meant that just hearing limited definitions of things like sex repulsion in aces didn't clue me in. It wasn't until discussing what sexual attraction was with a newly-realised gay first wave Xer last year that I realised I had no idea what that was and had never felt it, and was therefore asexual. Which after the discussion with that guy, I dove into readings by you all on Tumbler first.

And I only realised I'm aromantic last month, though I've been questioning for actually a year this month.

Now, I'd say my aesthetic attraction is definitely bi, and yes, I accept the redefinition made with the info we have now of two or more genders including your own" which *I read* as "but not necessarily all genders, and perceived gender is a factor" whereas pan seems to me like "perceived gender is not a factor in attraction" ??

Now, I still actually don't have an idea about my potential aesthetic feelings towards people who present NB. The men and women I feel it towards tend to have this or that decidedly masculine or feminine traits, and I may never, because people my age are less likely to come out.

Whether orientation or gender, people my age are products of a very binary 20th century. We were really all sorts of shape pegs, but many of us were and still are dodecahedrons and whatnot with choices of only square, circle, and mayyybe triangle holes.

Naturally, the dodecahedrons and the hexagons all tried to jam themselves in circle and square holes, whichever ones it looked like we could maybe wedge into.

This means plenty of us are going around thinking things like "I guess I don't like sex because I'm a woman" or "I guess I don't like the mushy stuff because I'm a man" or "I don't feel female so I guess I'm a man because I'm AMAB and that's all I got" etc.

Those most likely to come out are those with very strong NB/aro/ace feelings WHO BECOME INFORMED. And some may still not, or those with feelings they can't sort, because they've lived so long the previous way, they may at least feel they have too much to lose.

There's also people like me that need a lot of info to realise they were misreading their own feelings due to decades of amatonormative/heteronormative/binarist/toxic masculine brainwashing.

(I still don't like the term "toxic masculine" because I really want a term where we have more room to redefine "masculine" as decidedly masculine but wholly without the toxic stuff that's so married to "manliness," room to reject that stuff and revision manliness, but whatever)

THE REASON OLDER GENERATIONS DON'T HAVE THIS STUFF IS NOT BECAUSE YOU'RE INVENTING IT. IT IS BECAUSE OUR TIME DIDN'T ACKNOWLEDGE IT.

Yes, I think it's funny imaging how lost you'd be trying to use an 8-track player, or a library card catalogue actually made of index cards.

And had I not miscarried in December 2003 and had a sixteen year old, I'd have had them set up the internet TV device I got instead of three hours barely restraining myself from breaking it into pieces just like I was the only one who was able to figure out how to set the VCR clock and VCR+ timers when we got one when I was young. Which my difficulty with this stuff is more like a Boomer than an Xer. Most of my peers are pretty savvy. Sometimes my friends can tele-help me.

And I think new music,which I define as post-Y2K, stinks.

So I'm not hip and new. Plenty about me is just like your parents.

But no, you aren't making this up. And you're informing a lot of us. You're waking us up to how truly diverse humanity is. You're waking some of us up to who we really are.

And as for those of you who have crummy and even Karen parents, two things:

A. The Latino kids took me and the other Asian in in high school. There aren't many Asians in FL. (The "Another Chinese Family" bit on Fresh Off The Boat is so real) There are definitely some crummy Xers out there, and that's been true all along. There was even a right-wing youth org called "young republicans." There were Regean-loving racist queerphobes all along. They made my life miserable in high school, too.

B. There are also others like me that believe in you. That actually need you. You're bringing *back* a diversity that was smothered by colonial Europe. Historical precedent is actually on your side.

Thank you. I mean it. You're doing good, you're legit, and there are a lot of us who believe in you, too.

[deanbentley]

Trial Claim Form

The absolute thought, care and love that went into this form is amazing and should be what everyone aspires to have in a claim. That being said even Non-Romantic claims should have this much love and respect for each other so take note! The trial claim has been approved, and the papers will be officially turned in on Monday. 

SAWYER HUDSON AND FAUNA ELOISE WILL IMMEDIATELY MOVE INTO TRIAL CLAIM DORM 202.

Name and Age of Dominant or Switch: 

Sawyer Thomas Hudson, 24 years old, Dominant.

Name and Age of Switch or Submissive: 

Fauna Eloise Flanagan, 23 years old, submissive. 

Education Completed: 

Fauna: 5 months at a D/s school in Ohio and degree in Medicine

Sawyer: 6 months at a D/s school in Ohio, certification in Higher Education of Arts

Length of Relationship: 

Officially in a partnership and romantic relationship for one year and 2 months, however we were seeing one another on a more casual basis for three months before that.

Why would you like to enter into a trial claim?

FAUNA

I feel that Sawyer and I are an excellent partnership in all senses of the word, not only do I respect him and his authority as a Dominant I also love him as a boyfriend. I want us to be able to have a future together, and I think that my time at this institution would be best served if I could experience it in a claim with Sawyer. Honestly I have neither the want nor the need to submit to anyone else, and I want to spend the rest of my life with him. Also I don’t know if this needs saying on a form but I love him a lot, and also I’m exceedingly attracted to him physically. Plus I want people to have to defer to him when it comes to me, like if they perceive me to be acting up I want it to be Sawyer Hudson they have to talk to.

 SAWYER

Fauna and I have an excellent chemistry between us, both as Dominant and submissive and as boyfriend and girlfriend. We would like to enter the trial claim to prove that we’re best fit for each other in every sense of the world, as well as giving us enough experience in a safe, controlled learning environment to grow and adapt, before heading out in the real world. I also feel like I’d be able to care for Fauna better as my submissive, trial or otherwise, and any issues anyone has, I’d have the power to help resolve them, as well as give her a sense of protection. 

  Do you feel you know your partner well enough on a personal level?

FAUNA

I do, as Sawyer and I have lived together independently for over a year now, and have been committed to one another for all of that time. I’m aware not only of his expectations of me as a submissive but also of his own personal hopes and desires and how they function in regards to my own ambition. I know that he isn’t quite sure exactly what he wants to do in regards to his career right now and that’s more than fine with me, I want to help him explore that and to support him in whatever he does choose to do. There isn’t anything that’s a part of my personal history or development that he isn’t aware of, and we spend most of our time together so if I don’t know anything about him then I’m sure I’ll find out soon. 

 SAWYER

As we have just surpassed our year long relationship, including living together in close quarters, it is safe to say Fauna and I know each other extremely well on a personal level. From our daily routines, to habits, to even goals and hopes for the future, I know everything there is to know about Fauna, and am willing to support her every step of the way. We have developed enough trust with each other to discuss dreams both realistic and more outlandish, as well as our deepest, darkest fears and secrets. I have also developed a routine to fit around her studying, as her goal is to become a pediatric surgeon and I am more than willing to help her achieve it no matter what it takes, as I’m sure she is willing to help me find my path. 

  Do you feel as though you have learned enough about you and your partners limits and expectations of the relationship as a whole?

FAUNA

Due to my extensive knowledge of Sawyers personal history as well as numerous scenes I believe I know his expectations of me very well. He’s always been incredibly respectful with my limits such as not being photographed or recorded while in intimate situations, he’s the only person I would ever trust to push my limits or that I would be willing to discuss doing so. Because I know that he loves me and he would never ever want to do anything to hurt me.  I’m also aware of his past with BDSM and we both continually check in with one another during any scene. 

 SAWYER

We have made sure to stress the importance of communication in our relationship as a whole, with an added emphasis within our D/s lifestyle. From this, detailed discussions regarding kinks, limits, and preferred aftercare has been discussed, and adjusted when needed. The expectations from the relationship as a whole is rather simple; trust, love, and safety. We pride ourselves on practicing scenes in a safe, sane and consensual manner, and we have done scenes to test the boundaries for both of us so we can encourage safe-wording, and thus opening a conversation both needed, and should be expected. I trust Fauna cares about my limits and boundaries as much as I care for her, and I would put my life in her hands if needed, and am glad that, due to our constant communication, she is still comfortable and safe with me despite past mistakes in D/s relationships. 

  Do you feel you both are well versed in what a claim will be outside of the trial period?

FAUNA

Yes, Sawyer and I have discussed our future together in detail. We both understand that our claim will be a romantic partnership, and Sawyer is more than supportive of my desire to enter into a surgical internship program after we have finished our studies here. Sawyer and I share similar lifestyle aspirations, and we don’t expect the relationship that we’ve maintained for the past year to change dramatically after we enter into a claim. 

 SAWYER

We understand that a permanent claim is a more serious commitment than the trial period, and are excited for the potential challenge it could bring upon us. As we are both equally as trusting, caring and supportive in our relationship, both as a Dominant and submissive, and as romantic partners, we imagine that the permanent claim would make no difference to our arrangement. On top of this, we have discussed our future in detail, including her job as a pediatric surgeon, and desire to enter the surgical internship program upon graduation, and potentially moving to Malibu, California to do so. She is, in return, supportive of my desire to go back to school, and explore my options career wise. We also have similar ideas in lifestyle and budget, and can’t imagine a permanent claim would alter this.

  Do you believe you are comfortable enough with each other and the fundamental levels of BDSM as a whole?

FAUNA

I do believe so for a number of reasons before I met Sawyer I had already been involved in a number of BDSM dynamics as the submissive party and so my experience with kink is quite extensive. Paired with the schooling that I undertook at my previous institution, and a year of private exploration within our own relationship in which we have not only explored shared kinks but also experimented with new ones I believe I’m exceedingly comfortable with our dynamic in the D/s sense of the word. 

SAWYER

I am extremely comfortable with Fauna, as my girlfriend, my submissive, and as another person in general. Our trust in each other has helped me become more comfortable with the fundamentals of BDSM as a whole, as certain past experiences left me rather scarred, until Fauna and I created a trust between us that only built up over time. We have explored kinks we have in common, kinks the other one prefers more, kinks we were willing to experiment with, and have had in-detail conversations regarding this. In addition with our past education, as well as our schooling here, I can only imagine my comfort levels will grow even more.

  Lastly please provide the list of rules under which your claim will operate, including examples of punishments and rewards that may be used to reinforce them.

General Rules

Fauna Eloise will follow all laws and school rules to the best of her ability 

Fauna Eloise will wear her collar at all times

Fauna Eloise will use my title (Sir) where appropriate 

Fauna Eloise will put her mental and physical well-being first and communicate with me effectively if she is hurt or upset so that we can work on it together.

Fauna Eloise will try to never lie to me, if she does not wish to discuss something then she is simply to express that rather than lying. 

Fauna Eloise will remember that nobody she invites into our home is to touch the records or the books without my permission

Fauna Eloise will be respectful of our space, and keep it clean and tidy. This includes doing the dishes on a daily basis if she has cooked. 

Fauna Eloise will inform me before inviting anyone to stay the night and if she is staying the night anywhere else.

Any major financial decisions will be discussed before they are undertaken by either party.

Fauna Eloise is welcome to discuss any punishment that is being administered with me if she feels it is unfair or unearned, and should remember our claim is always an open conversation between two partners. 

Scene Rules 

Fauna Eloise will ask permission if she wishes to take part in a scene with anyone else. 

Fauna Eloise will use her safeword, and remember that she is encouraged to stop a scene at any time if she feels in any way uncomfortable. Should any new limits arise she should communicate this immediately so that I can keep her safe. 

Fauna Eloise will accept any and all aftercare that I deem necessary and tell me if she thinks anything is missing. 

Fauna Eloise will communicate if she wishes to try anything new or if she is interested in a particular scene

Wednesdays are our day, and should be reserved for exploring a new scene together or alternatively ‘date night’. 

Punishments will include: 

Removal of her Nintendo Switch

Sleeping in the spare room

Orgasm denial 

The temporary inability to socialise with Alexis St James (including text messages)

Rewards will include: 

Extra orgasms

A roleplay scene of her choice

Me appearing in a Tik Tok

One of her My Melody plush being moved to the living room

[theinsanecrayonbox]

Digging your tabletop pride icons! I like the filter effect they have! :-) Do you by any chance have a textpost of the characters and their sexual orientations/gender identities? I recognise some of your characters, but not all of them, and there are pride flags I've never seen before, so I'd like to learn more. :-)

well thank you. it was just a bit of photoshop work.

i do not have a list of that made up yet...so lets do that now lol

let me preface this though with two points.; 1) i am 1 of 2 females who play regularly in my dnd group of 6 (sometimes 7) people, the other is Dixon. so i am usually the only female in the party itself. i have only ever played 2 (and a half) male characters in the 6/7 years i’ve been playing; every other male character i do in my tabletop group arts are story characters, not player characters. i am also 1 of 2 (sometimes 3) people in the group under 40. romance isn’t really a big part of our storytelling...no matter how hard i try to put it back in there ^^; 2) i identify as quoisexual myself, so all my characters have that to some degree in them just because i’m the player and you bleed into your characters that way. i also use goggle as a helpful tool to learn about all the different identities, so my knowledge and interpretation is fallible.

ok so list now;

Paige-Cupioromantic, meaning does not feel attraction, but desires that type of relationship i went with this, because Paige....well...is Paige lol. as one player once said “it feels wrong trying to date her, because she acts so young and innocent” and to be fair, she isn’t really out here looking at people as romantic partners. she wants friends, she loves her friends. also you know, mortal embodiment of an eldritch horror terror, so...

Cizma-Fraysexual, meaning has strong attraction until a relationship is formed and then the attraction fades she’s the opposite of Paige, and this is mostly based on her “relationship” with InkShade honestly; she believes she’s madly in love with him, but he refuses her, so she pursues him more. i think if he gave into hr advances and reciprocated, she’d realized her feelings weren’t what she thought they were. i admit, this one’s new to me so my interpretation could be very wrong, but that’s how i feel it fits Cizma.

Ada-Quoisexual, meaning has trouble distinguishing between romantic and sexual attraction as i said above, my default is this, so if i don’t know a character’s leanings it’s their too (yes jelena is my icon and is this too fyi). BUT in fairness, it suits Ada because of how she was raised; she has very little idea how to properly people here. and she is developing some sort of a relationship with Til. also, her first dice bag was my pride bag with this flag.

Gauzra-Lithoromantic, meaning has desires of attraction, but does not want them reciprocated again, kind of supposed to be in opposite to Ada, and seeing as i still don’t know Gauzra’s personality this could change...but from my interpretation of her right now, this feels right. plus the flag goes with her color scheme.

Rosalba-Demisexual, meaning does not feel attraction until a strong bond is formed at the time i was playing Ro, this was how i identified primarily, but it still suits her i think. if you met Rico after meeting her, you would never know WHY they were a couple, but those two kinda fought against two life times to be together (three if you count the accent into godhood). Ro’s also never been good at getting close to people, but once she did, you’re stuck with her.

K’nessan-Nonbinary, meaning does not identify with a binary gender scale; Marsic, meaning is attracted to masculine qualities ok, ok, *technically* since Ness is a hermaphrodite they should be inter-sexed BUT they do prefer the gender neutral pronouns (followed by the masc; never use “it/that’ or you will die)...and their color scheme matches the flag, so... ^^; i also included in the list the Marsic because Ness does have a preference for male partners

Nemo-Asexual, meaning has no desires for attraction Nemo is nothing but a hero, so that pretty much screamed ace to me...plus it matched her color scheme

Mekala-Aromantic, meaning has no desire for attraction i wasn’t really sure about her, since you know 2 failed campaigns in a row didn’t give her much room to grow, but i could see this working. she’s not really looking for anything, more searching her past. 

Jass-Bisexual, meaning attracted to both males and females Jass is my sabretooth, so my sabretooth headcanons are canon for her lol. we only saw her have a relationship with fantasy!Deadpool in the game she was played, but hey

Tesla-Electio Aroace, meaning has no desire for attraction, whether sexual, romantic, or tertiary  i admit, this one is completely new to me, so my interpretation could be very wrong, but the idea that this is one that is uninterested in any form of attraction suits my viral android very well. again, she has gone on record saying that “the biological imperative for emotions is distractive” (more or less) which is especially funny since she was played in a valentines game where the goal was to let Cupid infect a town with horniness to make babies; Tesla was the only one unaffected and actively trying to stop that. so yeah.

Theo-Pansexual, meaning is attracted to any gender yeah, Theo’s just out there doing and being anything

Sean-Bisexual, meaning attracted to both males and females; he however has a stronger male preference i admit, one reason why Sean is bi and not just gay is for the “half and half” joke...but yeah, he started the game with a boyfriend, he would kill everyone for his boyfriend, he woudl die for his boyfriend.

Vitanya-Gynosexual, meaning attracted to feminine qualities still learning new things as we do this, but since Vita has had little development (but will be getting more) i’m kinda aiming to have her be a bit more into girls...we’ll see how that pans out

Lokaj-Androsexual, meaning attracted to masculine qualities originally i had him as something else, but when i saw that description i liked it better, since he ended up with Arkos and all

Arkos-Transgender, meaning identifies with a different physical gender than the one assigned at birth; Gay, meaning attracted to men going more off the latest version here than my previous one for this. but yeah, he’s just straight up trans here, not intersexed, and his tribe is cool with it. plus being a tribe means not enough money to get magic to physically change anything...but he’s ok with that. in his tribe it’s less what you have and more how to act.

Rikkar-Bisexual, meaning attracted to both males and females mainly because he did have a fiance...even though they weren’t super into the idea, they weren’t against it either...but he’s far more into Ark

Tarn-Lesbian, meaning attracted to women she has been a loud raging lesbian since day one, and nothing will ever change that. not even one continuity having her in a forced, bested in trial by combat, marriage to Starlord basically. she will only go for a dude if he’s a dragon...and he’s gotta be a hot dragon...and even then it win’t lasting dude.

Reyzah-Abrosexual, meaning one’s attraction is constantly changing or fluid Reyzah started as a knock-off tarn honestly and never got to thrive too much. but compared to her siblings, she was always the one learning and trying to figure herself out, so this fits well.

Margus-gay, meaning attracted to men Margus, similarly to his sister, started off as quiet nervous gay, and by the end of the adventure he had himself a doppleganger husband and confidence to boot, so yeah, my baby boy grew up good. admittedly a lot of his self-confidence issues were more from his half-orc heritage, BUT that fed into the “no one would wanna date me cause i suck” mentality. so yeah.

Nikkos-Asexual, meaning feels no desire for attraction he’s Margus’ twins, and was always intended to be some sort of ace. the joke being the Ironbrood kids are a full set; likes girls, likes guys, figuring things out, likes doughnuts. i waffled over making him a more defined type though...but since i’ve only played him for like one session as a background character, i’m not sure where he’s at. so general ace is fine. he loves and supports his siblings, and is best uncle to Margus’ kids anyways, so s’all good.

Jelena-Quoisexual, meaning has trouble distinguishing between romantic and sexual attraction i know i said up in Ada’s that Jelena was this too, but here i am saying it again since she’s my actual icon and not in the reffed to image set. i haven’t played her, so this could change...but i’m very self projecting on her during quarantine to begin with, so yeah she’s quoi until proven otherwise ^^;

so hope you found this informative...and that my information isn’t too terribly off ^^;;;

[nounicornhorn]

a unicorn tale

Follows is an account of my triad as briefly as I could manage. My ex-girlfriend has betrayed and lied about us, and I have long needed to get my truth out there.

So I knew she was controlling, but I had sympathy for her. I saw her feeling trapped in a marriage that didn't quite suit her and had put too many responsibilities on her shoulders. I knew they were trouble and that I had become a battleground for this. I cried myself to sleep on their spare bed wondering if I had ruined them.

He and I had a hard time staying away from each other. I thought he was doing this because we were allowed. When I asked him about it I found out we were not. We continued to have a problem with this, and although she was angry at him, this was far more to my disadvantage.

I knew she thought I was too into him and it was off-putting for her, but I also knew she was jealous. Her jealousy over someone she seemed to feel trapped by was difficult for me to take. But not without reason, I hoped that she had a disordered attachment style. I saw her to pushing both him and I away so that we would fight to get her back.

I have struggled with what emotional abuses to describe and which to skip. Suffice it to say, it is impossible to please my ex-girlfriend. She has always been ruthless and manipulative. I have never in my life been more motivated than I was when I was trying to protect us from her reckless and selfish destruction. Despite it, I always saw her as a vulnerable person and hoped we could be harmonious if we worked to earn her trust. We shared an amazing conversation dynamic and many mutual interests and had so many great moments, even close to our end.

He was my emotional rock, as I'm sure he was also hers. He and I seemed to have a loneliness and a devoted nature in common. I worried about her attitude with him and when he said she was like that when I was not there, I trusted him. I thought he and I could give each other a firm at home bond with little ambivalence. I thought I could give her my time and attention and a safe amount of freedom from him. I thought I could help them, but I knew it would be hard.

I spent tons of time with her, as a triad and a couple. I considered her an essential relationship in my life. I kept trying to earn my place in hers; Her stated reason for breakups was often her lack of interest in me sexually. I tried to argue for a label such as nonsexual romantic or queer platonic, but she insisted that sexual connection was imperative, so I kept trying.

Throughout, I had been considering myself a one-sided primary partner to both. I knew that I was only a secondary partner to them. In our talks, I'd tell him I was concerned she didn't love me and was only using me to bench him. Each time he'd patiently have me turn around and I'd feel encouraged to try to win her over.

When she got a steady boyfriend, she stopped breaking us up. Our quad almost seemed it might work out. Yet she spent way less time with me as soon as she met her new boy, which is why I lost hope of meaning anything more to her.

They had always massively overspent, so I wanted to work to pay for his uncovered medical needs. Years later, I was devastated by my lack of savings. I was working 60+ hr weeks merely trying my hardest to relieve us from her financial abuse. I had to look back and say all my hard work and effort to give them space had only enabled her. She had only become more demanding, abusive, and contradictory and would attack if held accountable.

I got fed up with it and started getting ready to leave, but he needed me and begged me to stay. So I warned them about the conditions where I would not stay: She must lift veto. If her boyfriend left she would not return to her previous behavior of excluding me from sleeping in our bed. She agreed to and told me she loved me, and I was elated. Yet despite everything, her boyfriend left and she immediately wanted to exclude me from same bedroom where I had always been while we were a quad. So I left them.

The next day, I met him and we talked. I agreed to return if he could smooth it over with her and she could re-commit to the rules I set about where I can sleep. I asked for a mutual primary relationship with him equal to hers and for him to stand up for me if she wanted to exclude me or unilaterally break us up. He agreed and returned home to talk with her and I was planning to later join them if it went well.

Instead, that night she hurt him terribly and crossed a very clear line. He fled the house, I picked him up. I was shocked she took her abuse that far. His sullen comments toward me added to my developing fear he resented me for getting tired of her shit.

In the few days after, she kept calling us back to take care of our dogs or other things she needed because she wouldn't do it herself. When we arrived to help her she screamed and unfairly berated us. For reasons such as: I refused to deliver her food once. She accused me of leaving her to die. (She threatened to kill herself if she didn't get what she wanted quite a lot.) Once I returned for medication we all needed and she actually hit me, scattering it all over the floor. "That doesn't belong to you," she said, even though I bought it for us all to share, took a portion and left her more.

When he went back again get our belongings, her aggression and screaming was was horrifying. Her being recorded deterred her none. In the footage, she complained that their unicorn was supposed to be for her and expressed her rage that he was my favorite.

She stole everything I owned that he could not get. She also took much of technically their mutual property really rightfully his, such as his collectables. She seemed ready to keep their dog from him forever, so we took the dog which she left outside with no people at home. (we left her their other dog) We cut contact when she wanted to harass everyone we knew over the dog. She then lied to the police and tried to get him in trouble for things he did not do. She had left her job and could not afford to keep the lease on our home and her dream house, so she totally trashed the place for our return. In court, she throws tantrums and even takes out her rage physically toward people who are there with her to support her.

He and I did not last as a couple to no one's surprise but my own. With her gone, I was no use to him, and I spent some months exhausting myself making sure of this fact.

I feel like I have learned a lot from watching someone I love abuse myself and someone I love. I hope it's given me a unique perspective that some people have expressed interest in. On the chance you have not found this boring and would like to be a beta for further writing, please let me know.

[robinine-blog]

Pairing the Scrooge

We all have our head cannons about sexualities and favourite pairings. I'm an inclusive person. I'm not sure if I have a OTP, although there's several I favour.

So here I'm going to present my thoughts on Scrooge McDuck, his sexuality and a few pairings for him.

Scrooge McDuck

Asexual? Possible. No long term romantic relationship in canon. Only one known sexual relationship, short term. Little evidence of sexual attraction to anyone.

Demi Sexual. My personal head canon. That one known sexual relationship? Only happened after he gained respect and appreciation for his partner, shown to still pine for that partner and regret the could of beens.

Hetrosexual? One known sexual relationship suggests yes.

Homosexual? Perhaps. Known to have several close relationships with men, and perform dating activities with them, such as dinners, social events, museum visits, sports and vacations. Could also be a preference for one to one friendship time due to being an introvert.

Homoromatic? Scrooge's feelings and actions seem to be of a more romantic nature than sexual. He wants to spend time and do social things with the men he's close to, but doesn't invite them into him home. Those that are invited into his home are employees or family, and within strict boundaries that Scrooge sets.

Bisexual? Perhaps. While his known Sexual relationship is with a woman, Scrooge has shown no desire either way, which could be him supressing all desire because it is a disadvantage in business. Or a factor of the media he is in.

Biromatic? Shown to have a few close friendships with both men and women, although he spends more time of a romantic nature with men.

Pan? Adding this because it's considered a separate sexuality, but I don't think there's the difference between bi and pan other than personal preference for the label (I previous thought it was a consideration of non-binary or trans people, but have revised my opinion in recent years)

So, I think that covers Scrooge's possible sexuality from my point of view, now onto pairings.

Scrooge X Goldie

The one who got away.

Their relationship in the comics and DuckTales '87 is shown as in the past. It was a brief fling that could have been more if not for a misunderstanding. And Scrooge definitely pines for her. He may even consider her his one true love.

Goldie on the other hand is shown to have very fond feelings for Scrooge, wants him to see her at her best, but I think she's moved on. It was a fond memory of a good man and several passionate fights, but from Goldie's point of view, this doesn't make the basis of a good marriage. Maybe when she was younger, before the misunderstanding that drove them apart, they could have made it work. But now? They're too invested in the lives they built for themselves.

In DuckTales 17 we get a very different relationship. Scrooge is attracted, Scrooge is pining, but there's no evidence that a sexual or romantic relationship has taken place. They are competitors.

Goldie is shown to have no romantic feelings and doesn't even consider the possibility of a romantic relationship with Scrooge.

There is mutual attraction, and respect for each others capabilities, but they have never allowed themselves to be vulnerable to each other until Scrooge opens up during the flashbacks in the episode "The Golden Lagoon of White Agony Plains!" At which point Scrooge feels betrayed because Goldie didn't have the same experience and didn't read his mind. She left him, assuming that it was still part of the game they played, while Scrooge had stopped playing and was ready for something else.

Thinking about this makes me angry, because Scrooge had no way of communicating, Goldie isn't a mind reader, and yet Scrooge feels betrayed that Goldie didn't understand?

In a future episode I hope we see Goldie tackle the idea of a romantic relationship with Scrooge, but for the moment her answer seems a clear no with confusion over why Scrooge wants to change the basis of their current relationship.

Scrooge X Bridgette

I've not seen much of this relationship, so apologies if I make a few wrong assumptions.

Bridgette seems to have a full blown crush on Scrooge, to the point of obsession and stalking.

Scrooge seems to have a very casual friendship with her, and doesn't seriously consider the possibility of a romantic relationship.

I don't like the vibe of it, but it probably depends on the writers. The comics can be a bit all over the place.

Scrooge X Mrs Beakley

I haven't seen them in the comics, and their relationship in '87 and '07 is rather different.

First of all let's deal with '87. As a child I was angry that Mrs Beakley worked for Scrooge without wages. To be honest, that still bugs me, but now I know a lot more history I can see why Mrs Beakley might have offered to work for free.

She's not an employee, she's a volunteer. She can walk any time she needs to, there's no contract in place.

She gets shelter for herself and her granddaughter, as well as the protection of a powerful, wealthy man. Maybe Webby is an heir to a fortune, and her grandmother doesn't want her taken advantage of by less moral relatives.

Maybe Mrs Beakley has money, maybe she just wanted out of a desperate situation, maybe maybe maybe XD all this considering is giving me plot bunnies.

But Scrooge does come to respect and appreciate her, as Mrs Beakley gains admiration for Scrooge (as well as knocking some of the glitter off her preconceived notions)

I think as their relationship develops, they gain a strong understanding of each other.

Could there be romantic love? Possible. Marriage? I don't think Scrooge would consider it even if Mrs Beakley angled for it, and I don't think she would want to give up her freedom that way

'07 is an entirely different kettle of fish.

Beakley and Scrooge again start with a work association, but they are being hired by the same company and expected to work together.

There's a bit of jockeying for power, as Scrooge considers himself the expert on this mission, while Beakley is the experienced agent. They work well together as partners and later seem to develop a friendship and presumably go on several more missions together.

They respect and appreciate each other, there's a lot of trust in this relationship, and they're both willing to call each other out when necessary.

Now here's a question for you. Has Mrs Beakley retired from the spy business altogether, or did she take up another role when she retired as Agent 22?

Current day, Mrs Beakley is working for Scrooge, but it could easily be a cover for something else. Considering Launchpad's and Fenton's activities, I don't think Scrooge would object if Beakley is taking a few missions on the side.

I think they have the basis for a strong marriage, but I don't think they would seriously consider a romantic relationship. Scrooge doesn't seem to fit Beakley's type.

On the other hand, I think most people would agree that Webby looks incredibly like a member of the Duck family. I'm almost tempted to suggest she could be Scrooge's granddaughter, if not for the importance of family to Scrooge. Even if he was the sperm donor, I imagine he would want some involvement, and Beakley's actions also seem to discount that possibility.

So overall, I don't think Beakley is attracted to Scrooge or vis versa, but I could entertain the possibilities for hours.

Scrooge X Ma Beagle

I can already hear the screams. XD

The only way I could see this relationship starting would be deception or magic.

The trouble being both Scrooge and Ma Beagle are known for their tricks, and I can easily imagine situations where one or both are disguised. Both want to know what the other is thinking/planning/plotting…

Of course it would end in tears, because we all know Ma Beagle just wants his money, and even if she didn't, who would believe that?

Although why it's okay from Goldie and not anyone else…

Onto the men in Scrooge's life.

Scrooge X Glomgold

I consider this crack. Entirely entertaining crack, but still crack. A relationship wouldn't work because they would never trust each other and Scrooge would grow bored of Glomgold's plotting.

Glomgold definitely has the obsession down, and he matters to Scrooge. Scrooge tried to do right by him, and failed badly. I'm pretty sure Scrooge wouldn't seriously consider it.

Scrooge X Duckworth

Possible? I don't know, there's a huge power issue here. I would love to know how Duckworth went from Scrooge's chaperone for high society to partner in crime. I actually suspect Duckworth's past has a few interesting twists and turns.

Scrooge certainly appreciates and respects Duckworth. Attraction? I don't see any. Just two very good friends, but I'm willing to consider otherwise.

Scrooge X Johnny

Scrooge seeks out Johnny for several reasons, and often these reasons come under the heading of possible date activity.

I don't know a lot about Johnny, but I could easily believe that they are dating, but keeping it quiet because of their reputations.

Does anyone have any other pairings they like to add for Scrooge? I know there's a few characters from the comics I've missed.

[desertgourd]

NAME:  Sabaku no Gaara

NICKNAME: Gaara of the Desert

GENDER: Male

ORIENTATION: wiggly hand motion - read more here

PREFERRED  PET  NAMES: None.

RELATIONSHIP  STATUS: Single.

FAVORITE  CANON  SHIP( S ): What’s canon?

FAVORITE  NON-CANON  SHIP( S ): Lee/Gaara, Deidara/Gaara in certain AUs (i.e. modern), Naruto/Gaara in certain contexts (since they’re doomed to fail). Open to others.  Please note I don’t differentiate between “top” or “bottom” and the order of the pairing makes no difference.

OPINION  ON  TRUE  LOVE:  See a full headcanon of Gaara’s perspective on love here. To put it in a few words: Gaara has lived nearly his entire life believing that love is something inherently tied with betrayal. Although he is slowly working through his decade and a half of severe psychological trauma borne of abuse and neglect telling him otherwise, Gaara is slowly realizing that love can take many forms, such as familial, platonic, or, yes, romantic. However, he struggles to comprehend how love can apply to him, and how he can express it to others. It is not something he has ever been taught to recognize. If a trusted person were to ask him, he would admit he does not think himself human enough to experience it.

OPINION  ON  LOVE  AT  FIRST SIGHT: Completely absurd. It is not possible to feel any genuine love merely due to a person’s appearance.

HOW  ‘ROMANTIC’  ARE  THEY:  Please see my headcanon on romantic affection here.

IDEAL  PHYSICAL  TRAITS: All physical traits he finds attractive are linked to personality traits that bequeath them. He is attracted to physical strength and prowess - those who keep both their bodies and souls healthy. He is attracted to a kind smile, confident movements, and gentleness.

IDEAL  PERSONALITY  TRAITS: As hinted above, Gaara prizes honesty, confidence, mental strength, flexibility, determination, and patience. He needs a partner who can help him develop and grow into a functional half of a relationship. He prizes kindness, but also sternness - someone who will not treat him like he is about to break, and someone who can withstand (and perhaps match) his inevitable stubbornness.

UNATTRACTIVE  PHYSICAL  TRAITS: Slovenliness, because this shows  a lack of self-respect and self-care. He tends to be less attracted to those who are markedly physically unfit, since he believes this shows a lack of work ethic and responsibility. Otherwise, emotional aspects are far more important than physical.

UNATTRACTIVE  PERSONALITY  TRAITS: Lying and deceit. Meekness. Weakness. Shyness. People who tiptoe around him; people afraid to speak their minds. Gaara cannot enter in a relationship with someone who expects him to make the first moves and do all the work; he simply does not have that capability.

IDEAL  DATE: Simple and intimate, and easily fit within his regular routine: Sharing a meal, or stargazing, or taking a walk along the village perimeter. Come visit him in his greenhouse so he can drone on for hours about his plants. Take him to the gardens or a park in Konoha he hasn’t visited before. He isn’t one for big displays of affection or surprises. You might be able to convince him to try a new food, if he trusts you.

DO  THEY  HAVE  A  TYPE: The traits described above pretty much fit his ‘type’ - you could say Lee and Naruto, both good relationship candidates, fall within the same type as well.

AVERAGE  RELATIONSHIP  LENGTH: Gaara has never entered a romantic relationship. However, once he chooses a person, he is unlikely to let go. Another betrayal via breakup would destroy him.

PREFERRED  NON-SEXUAL  INTIMACY: Physical intimacy is huge. Sitting or lying down together, hair stroking, massages, embraces, small touches on arms or backs. Just make sure he sees you coming.

COMMITMENT  LEVEL: Gaara mates for life. He is extremely slow to fall for someone, slower even to realize the feelings for what they are. He takes each step in a relationship almost bureaucratically, and once he has made a decision he is unwilling to change it. Any breaking of a relationship - death, breaking up, cheating - would crush him, and he would very likely never find love again.

OPINION  OF  PUBLIC  AFFECTION: Gaara will not shy away from small tokens of affection such as handholding or a kiss on the cheek, but he prefers anything more intimate to remain behind closed doors.

PAST  RELATIONSHIPS: Currently none. In my previous default portrayal he had entered in a long-term relationship with @urarenge‘s Lee in which they married after four years together and eventually adopted Baki’s infant daughter after her parents’ passing. After urarenge largely left that blog I reformed Gaara into my current canon default where he has had no relationship experience. In modern verse he had a long-term, on-and-off, and extremely dysfunctional relationship with a no-longer-active Deidara; I now portray him in that verse as having broken things off with Deidara in a messy, unfinished, and quite painful fashion.

tagged: @fadedmccn​, @deardeerdude​, and @ningxai​ alright yall you convinced me!

tagging: @spikyhairedsilhouette @licnsdenn @hyugainterior @icecurse @saligiare & whoever else wants to do it

[oneharry]

bestfriend!harry part two??? mhmmm

IT’S FINALLY HERE

I HOPE YOU ENJOY

IT’S A BIT DIFFERENT BUT I’M TRYING TO GO SOMEWHERE WITH THIS

HERE’S PART 1 BTW

Y/N is frantically running aroundthe apartment, trying to pick up some of the mess. They’ve been pretty carelesswith the way they kept the flat lately, because well, she’s a busy woman, andHarry still seems pretty down. He offered to pay some of the rent, which hedidn’t even have to do. She doesn’t want to ask for more.

She also tries to hide theembarrassing things laying around (like the outstanding amount of wine bottlesin the recycling bin, the cheesy workout DVDs, some corny romance novels andthat huge, neon-coloured vibrator Perrie got her when she came back from herJapan student exchange five days ago, to name a few). What’s left clutteringaround is mostly Harry’s, now, and as much as she doesn’t want to bother him,it needs to be cleaned up.

“Harry,pick up your shit a little, will ya?”

Harry mumbles out an unclearresponse from the sofa. The sofa, or what’s been primarily used as his bed forthe past three weeks, now, at least on most nights. Some nights, Y/N’s notsleeping at home and he gets to sleep in her bed. Some other nights, he gets tosleep in her bed for no good reason. She’s not out. She’s also in the bed.

Harry gets up from where he’s beensitting for three hours’ worth of How IMet Your Mother. He takes his time stretching his arms, groaning, as Y/Nwalks by to pick up some of the clutter and prods her fingers in his left side.It results in him bringing his arms back down quickly, yelping.

“Ow! Hey, don’t do tha’.” She laughsat his reaction.

“Then help me out a little, yeah? Idon’t want Sam to be repulsed by your mess.”

He chuckles and bends over to pickup some dirty clothes from under the sofa. He stands back up for a while andlooks at Y/N with a smirk.

“Ya really think a few hoodies lyingaround can keep a man from liking you?” he asks, cockily. “Geez, Y/N, do youeven know yourself?”

She sighs and rolls her eyes, whilehe actually awaits a response. She can’t help but smile at him.

“I know we’re married, but noteveryone feels the way you do towards me. Some people don’t even like me, canyou believe that?”

After Harry’s breakup, him and Y/N –who had also hit a (much smaller) wall herself after a series of datingmisfortunes – jokingly suggested that they should just marry each other. So,for the last couple of weeks, their lives have been punctuated by the aftermathof that tipsy inside joke: “Turn that shit down, sweet lumpkins, m’tryna take a nap,” “Yo, soulmate, did you make coffee?” and “Would you mind taking out thetrash, my sexy mystery rain man?”

Before Harry’s previousrelationship, Y/N always called him affectionate pet names on a more seriousnote. She does that with a few other close people in her life (mostly Perrieand maybe Liam) but it was way, way more frequent in Harry’s case. She stoppedabruptly at one point, he pretended not to notice. He did find it disturbingthough. But nothing else changed, so he didn’t think much of it. They now somehowmanage to bring it back ironically.

What’s even more ironic though, isthat they can joke about being in a very committed relationship, but they nevertalked about that kiss on the first night after the breakup. They also nevertalk about the multiple other occasions on which kiss happened. They,correspondingly, never talk about the cuddles, the very close, non-platoniccuddles, how Harry isn’t even ashamed of enjoying being the little spoon (whichhe was in his past relationships), and how when he isn’t the little spoon, heholds Y/N close enough so at some point she definitely feels his thickeningmember through his sweatpants or boxers, but she says nothing at all. They bothdon’t say anything, like they’re just friends who do that, like that’s a sanerelationship to have, like it can just bea thing. It’s all eating Harry alive.

The pet names, how the back of his stomach kind of bubbles up when shecalls him love of my life, no matterhow many layers of sarcasm there are, it all hurts. He’s angry that he can’tun-taste her lips and tongue, that he can’t un-live that enthralling momentwhen they absent-mindedly made out listening to Tame Impala, he kissed down herchest and abdomen and came strangely close to eating her out. It all messeswith him more than anything ever has.

“Listen, there’s some behaviours I’dlike for you to adjust,” Daphne said, fixing the slim strap of her clutch bagaround her body.

Y/N’s first thought is to somehowbelieve that Daphne must be drunk, but she quickly reasoned with herself,remembering that her and Harry just got here. The Yorkshire woman actually usedthis occasion – her asking for a moment alone with Y/N in Liam’s room – to dropher jacket on the bed with the others, specifically next to Y/N’s. Y/Nswallowed, annoyed, thinking that her jacket will probably smell likecigarettes for days if she didn’t wash it right away.

“What’s that?” Y/N asked trulyintrigued. Daphne chuckles, innocently.

“Can I ask you this – and I reallydon’t mean to be rude – but why would you even call Harry pet names?” Y/Nshrugged.

“Because I care about him, I’d say,”she replied. Daphne nodded along as she spoke. “We’ve been friends for years,we developed nicknames for each other, and stuff.”

“No, I get this. S’just that Harryhas a girlfriend now,” Daphne said while waving at Y/N, like she was trying tosignal her presence, like Y/N didn’t notice her enough. “Dunno, it’s weird. Youreally don’t feel weird about it at all? Calling someone else’s boyfriend ‘honey’ and ‘love’?”

“I don’t think of it like that. It’snot a romantic gesture. I call Perrie and Liam ‘babe’ all the time and they’re both in relationships.”

“That’s different.”

“How is it different?”

“Well for starters,” Daphne clearedher throat, leaning against the edge of Liam’s desk, trying not to display howannoyed she was, “you’re way closer to Harry than to anyone else. Also, Perrieis straight. She couldn’t be attracted to you. Liam doesn’t date girls either.”

“He does, though. He’s bisexual.”

“Well, his partner doesn’t seem toworry about you.”

“Why is that?”

“I don’t know, you’re friends.”

“Not really. We don’t hang out. Onlywhen I’m with Liam and he’s there,” Y/N paused. “He just likes me, I guess. Isthat the difference?”

“Y/N, I don’t hate you.”

“Yeah, but you don’t like me. Youdon’t have to like me, Daph,” She walked up to Daphne, who actually didn’tsmell like cigarettes. She smelled annoyingly good. “I know you’re not reallyfond of me, I’m not that stupid, I see it.”

“Y/N…”

“I understand it can freak you out abit that I’m so close to your boyfriend. I respect you, so I’m going to cut thepet names, but you need to understand that Harry and I love each other. Not inthe way that you and him love each other, at all. We’re best friends and wecan’t put everything we’ve had for the last eight years aside to leave room foryou.”

Daphne just stared at Y/N andnodded. She hated that Y/N was right. Her and Harry have a thing that she willnever understand, but that she has to deal with.

“I’m sorry Daphne, that wasincredibly harsh.”

“It’s okay, Y/N,” she chuckled. “Youand Harry have a thing. I don’t want to come in the way of that. I just need toadjust myself to that. I’ll be fine. Thanks for understanding, I see why Harrycares about you so much.”

She was cut off by Louis knockingand opening the door without waiting for a response. He stopped moving abruptlywhen he was greeted by Daphne and Y/N’s straight faces.

“Am I interrupting anything?”

“No! We’re all done,” Daphne replied,grinning. “We were just chatting.”

“The room is yours,” Y/N added,getting up, walking out and patting Louis on the shoulder, “you and Liam canbang all you want.”

Louis laughed at Y/N, and Daphnesighed. She hated how everyone liked Y/N. She was likeable, and Daphne had noreason not to like her, except wishing her own relationship with Harry was asprofound as his friendship with Y/N. All Daphne could do is be friendly, toeveryone, which she already was. Perrie once described her as annoyingly sweet, which was prettyaccurate.

She got up and tapped Louis’ shoulderas well.

“Just make sure you remove the jackets from the bed before you do thedirty, yeah?” That made Louis laugh.

“No,” Harry said.

“What? No to what?” Y/N asks,confused.

Harry realises he actually had beenpondering on his own for a while and that the context was lost. He chuckles.

“I find it hard to believe thatanyone would not like you.”

“I know some people who don’t likeme,” Y/N responds, cleaning the dining table.

“Really? Like who?”

“Your ex.” Harry sighs. She pointsat a towel on the floor for Harry to pick it up.

“Daph didn’t hate you.”

“But she didn’t like me. Pick up thedamn towel, love.”

Harry can’t think of any way torefute that. Daphne always wanted to be nice, and she never wanted to deceivehim. She always found a way of convincing Harry that she liked Y/N when she soobviously didn’t. She tolerated her, and she was always publicly sweet to her,but it seemed like chore, like community service. Yet, she was somehowirreproachable. The reason it looked so much like she was doing it against herwill was hard to pinpoint.

Harry reaches down for the towel andY/N playfully spanks him as she walks behind him to get to the bathroom,probably to get ready for her date coming over. He is a bit startled at first,before becoming angry at himself for getting slightly turned on. He wonderedwhen those interactions became so normal.

“My back hurts today,” Harry said,out of nowhere, really. “Dunno. Probably slept weird.”

Y/N gazed travelled from the tellyto her new unofficial roommate, who was shifting on the couch, trying to find acomfortable position. He was clearly dropping hints that he didn’t want tosleep on the couch tonight, for what literally would only be the fifth night inthe week and a half he had been staying here, but she pretended not to knowthat. She decided to push the tension even further, slightly amused.

“Want a massage?”

Harry’s whole body tensed for half asecond, but he then played it off like it was no big deal at all, like thethought of it didn’t already make something in his chest feel swirly.

“Yeah, sure. F’ya want.”

He turned around a little so hisback is facing her and cracked a big smile as he felt her hands start to rubhis aching back. His shoulders dropped a bit and she chuckled.

“We should get you a propermattress,” she suggested. “Maybe at least an inflatable one. This sofa sucks.”

Harry winced as Y/N’s fingers workedon a bad knot at the bottom right of his back. The throbbing pain slowlyworsened before suddenly stopping, getting him to exhale loudly in relief. Herhands were incredibly soothing. She was very good at massages; despite beingpersuaded of the opposite.

She scooted a bit closer to him, andsomehow, without seeing it, he sensed it. He felt a sudden heat around him anda shiver up his spine. His back tensed up slightly. Y/N laughed.

“Hey, relax.”

He took a deep breath and tries tofocus on the television, but Y/N touch made it harder than he thought. She keptkneading his back until she felt like he was finally relaxed (which he neverwas, his body felt like it was on fire). She then leered and ran her fingers onthe back of his ribs. He wormed around a bit and giggled loudly.

“Ah, Y/N, tha’ tickles!”

She snickered and he turned around,with a defeated sort of pouty smile. She, for some reason she didn’t want toconnect with, found that smirk extremely attractive, and her body absentmindedlykind of stopped all activity to just, stare,and Harry didn’t really react. He stared back, his face slowly approaching hers.

After their lips locked for a shortthree seconds, they looked back at the screen almost in an inhumane manner,like there wasn’t a single feeling involved in the kiss. In reality, Y/N wasactually weirdly overwhelmed, and Harry had a whole entire Big Bang in hischest. But they don’t talk about that.

As their movie ended and the creditsrolled, Y/N turned off the TV and yawned.

“M’going to bed,” she mumbled, stretching.She slowly got up and lazily walked to the bedroom. Harry just silently staredat her. She looked back at him as she stood in the room’s doorway.

“Aren’t you coming, H?”

Y/N touch, lately, feels like thebest thing to ever happen to him. But it’s weirdly narcotic, and he feelshimself starting to actually crave or even need it. She fills that need,always. It’s like she senses his lust and actually wants to quench it. It’salmost like she also feels it, sometimes.

Harry throws the towel in thelaundry basket by the bathroom door and smiles to himself. She didn’t need toslap his butt just now. She did it anyway. And every time she kissed him, shedidn’t need to.

It feels so natural, like there is absolutelynothing unusual of off about them showing that kind of affection towards each other.No word has to be said. Maybe it’s a rebound. But he was already confused atthe end of his relationship with Daphne. Maybe it’s loneliness, because they’resurrounded with so much love – Perrie is already planning on buying a condowith her boyfriend, and Liam just loves his, and gushes about him so much he’son that thin line between adorable and irritating – and maybe they crave thatsame sensation.

He wants those small things (andbigger things) to keep happening. And he wants them to happen with Y/N, and Y/Nonly, somehow. He denies the obvious reason why. But what he is fully consciousof, is that Sam is coming over, and he despises the thought of her with anotherman. He is very, very aware of that.