#i will try and post semi-regularly about it here because i know it's important to not let things get brushed under the rug

[doodlebloo]

Rat Time Approaches......

[39oa]

hi! i’m slowly getting interested in f1 but i don’t really know how to start. so i was wondering if you had any content to recommend (except for the races of course) to get into the fandom, or anything else that could help, really.. thanks :)

oh anon i would love to help!!! are there any drivers/teams you're already particularly fond of or things you want to learn more about? i feel like it'd be easier to narrow down content if i understood your interests better since it's really something you can mold entirely to your own tastes and there are a million different ways to Enjoy and Consume the sport LOL. tbh i call myself an f1 fan but i mostly just rep oscar and in reality enjoy junior formulae more as a whole because i find the process of getting to f1 more intriguing than actually being in it... so it's really whatever you make of it! i'll try to divide my notes categorically so hopefully that helps a little bit but lmk if there's anything specific you're looking for :') and as always apologies in advance for my rambling 💔

getting into the actual sport

having a baseline understanding of the sport is obviously useful but i'm not sure how much you already know so i'll assume you can find super basic info about how seasons and points work! if you want to delve just a Bit further then:

i think chain bear is a decent youtube channel for easy explanations on some technical aspects and little things you may not have picked up on yet that will help when watching races

drive to survive is of course Not Great but it can be a nice and quick window into learning names and faces, even if a lot of it is ridiculously simplified or overexaggerated. it's basically like using duolingo for learning a new language in that it should be regarded as a semi-reliable supplemental material readily packaged for convenient consumption. if there are specific drivers you're interested in you can always pick and choose eps to consume decent Background Lore for, e.g. you can just watch s1e8 if you're a sharl fan

honestly not to shill for official f1 media but i do think f1tv is a pretty decent streaming platform when getting into the sport... definitely not saying you should subscribe to it (if it's even available in your country!) but just as an aside and maybe for future reference i do believe it's very friendly for new watchers because live races have different feeds that let you track race data (gaps, tyre usage, granular sector data during quali, etc.) and it also lets you switch between driver onboards which can be cool. moreover it has pre-race/post-race shows, technical analyses, archives of past seasons, all the f2/f3 content, documentaries, etc. so it's a pretty complete package! although a good amount of stuff gets x-posted to the official youtube channel so it's not a big deal

if you like podcasts, i think beyond the grid is cool because it has a fun variety of interviews (current drivers, retired drivers, tps, engineers, etc.) about both past and current events so you can basically seek out whatever you're interested in learning more about. otherwise i don't really listen to f1 podcasts regularly because i have weirdly low patience for them compared to hockey, but my friend told me that shift+f1 does yearly primers so that could be something useful to check out! (here's the 2023 season preview, i haven't checked it out but i thought i'd link anyway)

keeping up with news

obviously an important part of fandom is trying to keep up with current affairs, so if you haven't already then i would of course follow the f1 youtube channel + twitter account (or whatever other social media you use), f1 nowadays is extremely effective at marketing itself so it's not like hockey where you're fighting for your life waiting for the unfunniest puck personality video in existence to drop every 8 months. not that all f1 driver content is necessarily funny but there's probably a touch more investment in maintaining the illusion! anyway.

if you use reddit then r/formula1 is honestly probably the best aggregate source of f1 news and up-to-date info, i don't read everything there but it's pretty useful and easy to navigate. plus sometimes when i want to cause myself irreparable psychic damage from something that already pissed me off i can venture into a 500-comment section to get my blood boiling even more... 10/10 would recommend

other than that it's really like — follow official channels for any other drivers or teams you're fond of tbh, i do have a few motorsports journalists in my twitter list but since i respect the fact that some people don't enjoy endless news spam i'd maybe just recommend chris medland if you want a succinct live feed during races for the moment? f1 journalism is kind of godless so you don't *need* to follow that many reporters on a whole.

driver personality content

unfortunately i'll be showing my age when i say i don't have a tiktok account but now that i think about it that's probably a great source of information because it seems like f1 fandom is thriving over there!!! regardless the official f1 youtube does have a lot of little driver personality videos you can watch to get to know them more, and again i'd recommend checking out official team + driver channels for more tailored longform content. for ex just from very recent mcl fan pov they have an unboxed series with behind the scenes of select races and also loads of fun minigame content; every team should have at least SOMETHING to nibble on but certain teams are definitely more marketing-savvy than others (aka big 3 + mcl) 🥲

official f1: f1 has a yearly series called grill the grid with just mini quizzes that all the drivers compete in, some are less interesting but it's overall not bad content. the channel has a playlist for the 2021 gtgs which includes the iconic sebvettel world champion video LOL... actually if you sort the f1 channel by Most Viewed there are probably some fun classic videos in there (looking now it's a lot of crashes but you can ignore those lol), like press conference highlights and other convenient top 10 lists. for a random rec i was just nostalgically revisiting the 2019 rookie of the year video and it was getting to me a little bit!

sky sports f1 will also occasionally have good interview/inside content that you can check out, a lot of it is geolocked though (same with canal+ content in france). but for example i felt so much experiencing this random alex interview from last week... he is truly guy of this world

fan compilations: again if there are any drivers you like then you can just search up their names and there will be a ton of comps with Funny MomentsTM, sometimes it helps to just pick a guy and see how you feel about him as you consume content because your true interests will organically develop and surface eventually... sorry i feel like i'm writing a manifesto on fandom in general which is definitely not what you asked for LOL. but like twitch quartet (aka charles, george, alex, and lando) have a ton of silly streaming highlights you can find on youtube, lando has a gaming company called quadrant that he does videos with which can be uhhh hit or miss depending on how much you enjoy Lad Culture, etc...

really it's so easy to get hyperspecific with content once you pick a team or driver so i'm not sure what else to recommend on a general level but that's what i've got off the top of my head! fandom definitely skews a lot toward rb/merc/fer/mcl so it's easiest to consume both video content and fic for them, but if you're willing to go trawling for interviews then you can really get invested in anyone... fandom culture also varies so wildly depending on how you follow the sport and which drivers you invest in emotionally. my closest friend is a "chirlie" as they say and it really is an experience rife with organizational trauma and TFW You're Beholden To The Stranglehold Of Your Legacy so that's always a great pick if you're craving maximum narrative evisceration, or if you're in it for the fic then you could literally just get really into maxiel, but i'm basically chilling in my land of rookie stonks and sit down to watch non-mcl content maybe once a month.

honestly i only follow like 3.5 f1 fans on tumblr because i'm objectively terrified by the size of the fandom HLSHDFLKH so i mostly consume things in a vacuum and talk to like one friend 😭 but there loads of cool creators out here and you can always find a few gifmakers/fanartists/etc. and just follow the rabbit hole from there!!! best of luck and hope this helps >__<

[earthisspaceaustralia]

Do you have a favorite fanfiction?

Oh, I used to have a list of favorites somewhere.

Here's a list off the top of my head from the fandoms I currently read fic from. (Edit: Oh lordy I hyper-fixated. this not a short list. Also, I'm ace and am not really attached to OTPs so pairings are almost never the same fic to fic)

These are all on Ao3.

Harry Potter:

Of a Linear Circle by @deadcatwithaflamethrower, I don't remember if it's still in progress but it's at a good stopping point for people that like to only read complete things. Epic length fix-it that is still technically canon compliant until shortly before Year 5.

Circles of Power by mad_martha. Post-canon Harry/Ron where Ron is a seer. My favorite depiction of interesting uses of divination magic in Harry Potter.

Island of Fire by esama. Incomplete, and probably abandoned. It is technically a cross-over but I know nothing about the other fandom. A take on what if Harry Potter characters were stranded on a deserted island.

The secret language of plants by Edrina. I don't remember if it's complete or not. It's tagged in my bookmarks as 'the one with the socialist uprising at hogwarts'.

The Sum of Their Parts by holdmybeer. Complete. Post-canon Dark Lord!Harry. Could be read as Harry/Ron/Hermione. Harry notices government change only happens due to a Dark Lord. Chaos ensues.

Marvel:

Damaged Defenders by Sherza. Epic length fix-it. Started shortly before Captain America: Winter Soldier. Canon divergence during the first Avengers movie. Incomplete, but I still have hope that it's not abandoned.

Love is for Children by YsabetWordsmith. The Avengers get therapy through non-sexual ageplay. It's fabulous series and equal parts angst and fluff. In progress and still updating semi-regularly.

Coulson Lives but the Avengers might be the death of him by NiennaNir. Mostly canon compliant until partway through Age of Ultron, though the fic starts soon after the first Avengers. A team as family series.

The Butterfingers G.D.I Stark Guide to Problem Solving by Epiphanyx7. The one where Dummy You and Butterfingers make a baby because they are worried about Tony.

Take All The Courage by prettybirdy979. Usually I don't like misunderstandings in fic but I understand why this one happens. When you are trying to teach a blind guy sign language without him letting you know he's blind, things aren't gonna go when. Daredevil and Avengers team up.

Eight-Armed Hugs by Not_You. In all honesty this one is pretty weird. The best summary would be the description on Ao3. "The obvious corollary to hawk!Clint fics is a spider!Natasha fic".

Yes Phil Coulson does wear jeans by orderlychaos. Written shortly after the first Avengers movie. Very important detail to me: Tony has an army of sentient roombas. One of which is named dave.

Infinite Coffee and Protection Detail by owlet. At the end of Captain America: Winter Soldier, a switch flips in Bucky's brain and he decides to protect Steve without letting Steve know he's there. Favorite tag: "Everyone has their sassy pants on".

Use Your Words 'Verse by SmutLover. Team as Family, canon-divergence after Captain America: Winter Soldier, excellent use of social media.

Star Wars:

Re-Entry and Re-Entry: Journey of the Whills by @deadcatwithaflamethrower. Two beyond epic length Star Wars prequel fix its. The second is a continuation of the first, and is currently on hiatus.

A Star to Steer By by dogmatix and norcumi. Star Wars / Stargate crossover where the goa'uld are actually Sith. I knew almost nothing about Stargate when I read this the first time and it was really good. Incomplete but I think still in progress.

The Vode by RoseThorn14. A whumpy (at least in the beginning) arranged marriage Cody/Obi Wan fic. Incomplete, but I think still in progress.

Implications by AngelQueen. A funny one shot where Palpatine tries to make Anakin think that Padme is cheating on him with Obi Wan and Anakin thinks, well I have two hands....

[uta-no-sin-sama]

New Post Series Coming Soon: 5 Fun Facts and 5 Headcanons

I hope 2022 has treated you all well so far. I've had this idea for a post series for a couple months now, and wanted to wait until the new year started before I started the series.

This was inspired by a TikTok series by user alli_bugg that she does on her page where she mentions 5 fun facts about various anime characters on their canon birthdays. I figured, why not do that on my blog?

I'm also adding my own little twist to this series by also adding 5 small general headcanons I have for each character. I know most people here just write an imagine as a sort of "special" for character birthdays, but because my life offline is too hectic and energy-draining for that, I figured this would be easier to keep on top of while still celebrating with the rest of the fan base.

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More Info about this series

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What can some of these fun facts include?

I'm going to try my best to include things that can be found in material other than the anime (the games, manga, etc), but my main source I'll be using is the Fandom wiki page. Some things I might include are:

- star signs

- likes and dislikes

- Canon information (Warning: might contain spoilers, especially for later seasons)

- info about their VAs and their roles outside of Utapri (important note: because Utapri does not have an official English dub at the time of writing and is likely one of those anime that will probably never get an English dub, assume any and all information regarding VAs is for the Japanese versions of any other anime mentioned)

- original concept ideas/stuff deleted from final product we all know and love (this one will probably be lacking, ngl)

What can headcanons include?

I have already posted a few headcanons on here, but I'm going to try not to repeat any of the ones I've already posted. They'll be more focused on the characters themselves rather than in given scenarios. These can include, but are not limited to:

- fluff (what I write best lmao)

- angst (I'll try not to post too much of this, we're celebrating birthdays here, after all)

- possibly canon-inspired

- smut/semi-smut (some characters, definitely not all in this little series)

When can we expect these posts?

My time zone is about 12 hours behind Japan's time zone, so I plan on posting each of these between the hours of noon and midnight EST the day before the birthday of the character in question, so that would make it available sometime between the hours of midnight and noon in Japanese time.

When's (insert best boy/girl here)'s going to be posted?

Here's the order of when I'll post these. There are 23 total characters that will be in this series, 20 of which I regularly write for and 3 I don't usually write for. You can also find the links to their posts here in case you miss any!

January

- 7th: Nagi

- 23rd: Camus

February

- 14th: Ren

March

- 1st: Ai

- 3rd: Haruka

April

- 30th: Yamato

- 11th: Otoya

May

- 5th: Kira

- 15th: Ryuuya (Note: This one might be posted a little bit earlier, maybe by a day or two, because I actually have the same birthday as him lol)

June

- 9th: Natsuki and Syo (they will each have their own post, and I'll try to space it out so they're not posted at the same time)

July

- 7th: Tomochika

- 13th: Reiji

August

- 6th: Tokiya

September

- 1st: Eiichi

- 15th: Ringo

- 29th: Ranmaru

October

- 20th: Eiji

- 31st: Cecil

November

- 4th: Shion

- 22nd: Shining (I'm probably going to regret including him in this list lmfao)

December

- 12th: Van

- 29th: Masato

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I can't wait to start this new series for you all and I hope this will make up for a lack of any kind of imagines as I try to get back into the swing of things.

Up first, our favorite cosmically-cute idol!

- Lizzie Rose

[wistfulwatcher]

Hello I saw your tag on that "im 25 and dying post" please tell us how it got better for you. Im 26, still living with parents, currently having a fight with my boyfriend, and i still have a year until I get my bachelors. The comparison to everyone younger than me is killing me.

I'm really sorry to hear that you're struggling, but I hope you can take some solace in the fact that that post has a lot of notes and you are absolutely not alone in feeling the way you do! I can certainly try and share my experience, but unfortunately I think the biggest factor is just time (and like, a buttload of self-reflection).

I moved back home after college and worked full time at an administrative job I was doing during school breaks. I majored in psychology and anthropology in college, and was planning to eventually go into forensic psychology, but wasn't interested in going straight into grad school. So I did that administrative job for about a year, and tried to find something that was a bit more stable and at least semi-related to my field. I did end up finding a new job when I was 23 - stable, semi-related to my field (a psych/research background was required), and decent pay (especially as I was still living at home). Exactly what I needed, since I still wasn't ready to start looking into grad school.

I was doing pretty well, until I started getting comfortable at that job, and then I started getting hit with the "I'm not doing enough," and "I need to look into grad school," and "will I ever find a boyfriend?" (friendly reminder that 23-year-old me thought she was straight, yikes), "how will I afford to move out, I have to save my money and do it soon!", "I'm not doing anything but watching TV, I'm wasting my life," "I'm lonely, but I'm too tired to try and make friends," etc., etc.

But it wasn't constant. I'd have a flurry of those questions and fears, and then days where I was just living life and doing my job and taking care of my dogs, without any of that. And I don't think I felt good or particularly comfortable those days, it was more like I just wasn't actively thinking about it, like when you feel "good" after a physical pain goes away and you're just normal.

Eventually, I started thinking about all of these concerns I had, and the fact that it felt like it was URGENT whenever I thought about them. It felt like I needed to get my shit together immediately. I also started to acknowledge that there was this big sense of guilt around those concerns; I was too old to be living at home, I was too old to be single, I was too old not to be starting a career. I felt like I was wasting my life (cue the guilt), and I realized that part of why I felt like I was wasting it was that I felt like I was missing milestones I wouldn't be able to do at a later time because the older I was past "normal" the more humiliating it would be to try (cue the shame and embarrassment, hard).

I also started to doubt that I wanted to go into forensic psychology. More importantly, I started to seriously doubt that I wanted a "career" at all. My job (as I kept that same semi-related to my field one) was absolutely a job, not a career. And I think this was a huge tipping point for me, because a career had always been a given in my life. I'm passionate about what I'm interested in, so it literally just never occurred to me that I would be content with a job. I also started acknowledging that I had some messed up associations about being content with a job meaning that I was lazy (because the only way to be ambitious is with a career and, more damaging, a lack of ambition is fundamentally bad).

Now, I need to clarify that all of the above occurred over the course of years. I was constantly seeing "friends" (i.e., of the facebook variety) go to grad school, start careers, get married, buy homes, etc. And with all of that alongside the entire mess I've outlined in the above paragraphs, it was really, really, tough. It gets hard to find a foothold in better thinking, I believe, when seeing all of these people (some younger) doing things "right" was really just compounding my guilt and shame. (I feel like it's worth mentioning, too, that I was always "an individual" growing up, march-to-the-beat-of-my-own-drummer, yada yada. I feel like that's worth pointing out for others who may be in the same boat, because I think it can lead to another layer of shame in comparing yourself to those around you - especially if it's a big part of your identity that you DON'T do that, because I think it's inevitable as you get older, and you're looking to reach these milestones that prove you're an adult.)

So, here I am, acknowledging that I feel guilt and shame about what I'm not doing. And suddenly I ask myself my first really important question: Do I want a career? The question hot on its heels is: Do I want to go to grad school? Honestly, my answer is no. There is nothing in me that's excited by the prospect. But what, does that mean I'm just going to work my job for the rest of my life? How is giving up going to make me feel better about Not Doing Enough?

As I'm opening this door (remember, years), three things happen: 1) I realize I'm gay, 2) I watch Dirty 30, 3) I start playing D&D.

First, realizing I'm gay. Woohoo! Not only was this exciting because girls are amazing, but it made me seriously look at myself. Realizing I had spent 25 years assuming one thing about myself that turned out to be completely wrong made me question everything for a while. I started to ask myself, "Do I really like this?" more often, which seems like a really obvious question, but I'm not convinced that it's one people ask themselves consciously all that often. But once I did, I realized how freeing it was to answer, "No," and move on to something I did like.

Second, I watched Dirty 30, the Grace Helbig/Mamrie Hart/Hannah Hart movie. It feels dramatic to say that it changed my life, but the older I get the more I honestly think it did. Mamrie Hart's character is a dental hygienist who is freaking out about turning 30 and feeling very much like that text post I reblogged. But (spoilers), at the end of the movie, she decides that she loves her job (job, not career!) because it's comfortable and she has fun at work, and that it makes her happy. She has other things going on, but the idea that a character in a film is content with her job and choosing to "settle" into her life as-is and she's genuinely happy about it? I honestly can't think of a single other time I've seen that happen on-screen. I still think about that ending very often. And after seeing it, I started to ask myself another question regularly: "Am I happy?" Again, this feels pretty obvious, but I think there is something incredibly empowering about making sure you are happy on a regular basis, instead of just assuming that you're fine until something hurts.

Third, I started playing D&D. This is not a plug for D&D! (Well, maybe a little.) One thing that happened to me when I started to get into the urgent-guilt-shame-confusion mess of my mid-20s was that I got very much into a routine of go to work, come home, sleep, go to work, come home, sleep, be totally brain-dead on the weekend, repeat. I found it very difficult to feel creative because I was just wiped, and as all of my creative outlets (gifs, fanfic) are self-motivated, it was really easy to brush them off. I ended up starting Critical Role (this is also not a plug for CR! well, maybe), and I wanted to give D&D a try myself. (I was VERY lucky - my best friend happened to be listening to the Adventure Zone at the same time I started CR, and she wanted to try to run a game. The stars truly aligned!)

I started playing, then DMing, and found that it was a great fit for my interests. I used to be a theatre kid, and I was getting to act again (something I didn't realize I was missing). I was getting to build and flesh out characters, which is what I love the most about writing fanfic. I was also discovering that I was stretching myself - world building and plot had never been my strong suit, but as a DM it became the majority of my creative effort. It gave me soft deadlines with people I didn't want to let down, and it made me truly social again for the first time since college. Essentially, it was filling in all of the gaps of what I felt lacking in my life. This isn't a D&D plug because it wasn't D&D specifically, but rather a hobby that satisfied what was missing in my life. For example, I didn't realize how isolated I was before D&D until I had regular interactions with friends, and that isolation absolutely made the urgent-guilt-shame-confusion worse.

D&D gave me that final push to realize that I was OK with having a job and being passionate about hobbies instead of trying to fit myself into a career, because I was getting out of that hobby what I had been convinced I would get out of a career. I started to really value that I could punch out and go have fun doing exactly what I wanted to do. (It feels so obvious as I type this, but it took me a long time to get here! Sometimes it really is that simple!)

The above is specific to my job vs. career struggle which may not be in the mix of things you're struggling with. But what I do think is universal/can be your take away, is that sometimes you just have to actively choose to let go of the pressure to be doing things. Which, I know, sounds so much easier than it is (and part of why I think it just takes time/is part of growing older). But I think it's something that can be worked at over time, by checking in with yourself about what you feel, why you feel it, and what you need to make yourself feel better in the present.

It's been 6 years since I started that semi-related job, and I'm still there. I still live with my mom. I'm still single. My circumstances have not changed since 24, but honestly? I'm OK. When I check in with myself about it, I do enjoy living with my mom and our dogs (even though I'm 30 and "real" adults move out). I am happy more often than I'm not (much more, actually!). I have a job that allows me to be done after 8 hours, and I have hobbies I look forward to doing each night (and the energy to do them, most of the time). My weekends are free to play D&D with my friends and laugh until I cry. That is what I've worked out as my definition of what I want life to be right now. You'll notice it includes none of the "milestones" that those younger than me have hit.

As I noted on that text post tag, I still struggle with this. I definitely have days where I think, I'm a mess, I'm not DOING anything. It's hard. But time does help, those days become fewer and farther between.

I know that was probably a hundred times longer than you wanted it to be, but I did want to illustrate just how much of a process it is. It takes time. My summary advice is to check in with yourself often, be honest about what you want and what you need, do not let anyone else define where you "should" be. And if you aren't living life how you want to be, identify what you can do (however small) to make yourself feel like you're getting closer.

[chainofclovers]

It’s been awhile since my brain insisted on a Life In a Bulleted List post! (Please forgive any odd emotional leaps bullet to bullet.)

During the middle part of this week, my wife is going to travel for a work thing for the first time since February 2020. We’re both fully vaccinated, in a spot with low COVID numbers, and she’s going to a spot with low COVID numbers, and honestly, it feels weird to be the amount of worried I am, which is not very worried! Obviously COVID is still a massive problem worldwide, and of course we live in a country whose greed and foreign policies actively make things worse for other places, and of course it’s still very important to take every precaution here (we’re still wearing masks in stores/public places, for instance). But I’ve spent the last fifteen months with pretty painful anxiety, worry, and anger as my near-constant companions, and it is wild to think about my wife going off to a different area and to feel...pretty much OK with that. 

This will, however, be my first (and second and third) night spent without her since, yes, February 2020. And honestly, while it might be kind of a novelty this week to, like, eat something I like that my wife doesn’t, or to stay up writing until a not-very-sensible hour...all this time together has been great. Didn’t get tired of her once. (At least not anything a solo walk around the neighborhood or a solo trip to pick up groceries couldn’t fix.) We are very lucky. Understatement.

I am becoming a person who doesn’t kill every plant. And our yard is closer to “done” which is very exciting. And I’m finally getting to the point with container gardening where our food is semi-regularly seasoned with things I’ve grown. I’ve got a lot to learn but for awhile I was worried I would never be even partially successful.

Last week we found two young opossums dead in the backyard, quite far apart from each other. We couldn’t figure out what happened, but it’s possible they got into some poison elsewhere and ventured into our yard? I said some words over them (it’s not like we knew them but I suppose everything deserves to hear “you are loved and will be remembered” even if the people promising to remember you are just two random women) and we buried them and it was really sad. I love opossums, and I wish I knew what happened so I could try to prevent it in the future.

My writing brain continues to be entirely focused on fiction (well, fiction and my professional genre). I’m almost certain I’m currently setting a record for Longest Time Without Poetry since my childhood, maybe. It’s weird. But fiction! I’m having so much fun and feel so connected to everything I’m writing and thinking about, both in terms of orignal stuff and fic. I love the feeling of being out in the world doing mundane little things but in a good mood because of fiction. :) :) :) 

I haven’t watched all of this past Friday’s Fire Drill Friday yet, but I think Jane Fonda’s hair is getting more Grace Hanson-shaped as the G&F season 7 filming gets closer to resuming. I feel very convinced this is true, whether intentional or subconscious, and I hope it means they’re gonna let Grace’s hair go grey this season. I know there’s at least one interview in which she said that’s what she wanted to happen, plus the Grace wig visible in S7 BTS pics (since they started filming after she’d already changed her real hair) seems to have grey roots?!

Speaking of FDF, the guest was Demi Lovato and it is pretty wild how many people on the Instagram event announcement, people who claim to be a Jane Fonda fan or a fan of the environment or social justice or whatever could absolutely Not Handle It to see someone respectfully yet nonchalantly use the correct pronouns for a non-binary person? The sanctity of grammar argument is EMBARRASSING. The phrase “attention addict” is EMBARRASSING. Especially since judging someone for seeming like an attention addict seems like a slippery slope on Judgment Mountain to judging someone for their actual addictions, past or present. And since we as a society love to punish people for their addictions and weaknesses instead of celebrating the way that self-discovery and honesty and self-actualization give people the tools to be stronger and cope with their “weaknesses” more effectively. And I’m sorry, Gail, but if you aren’t thinking maybe it’s a little weird that an 83-year-old can use they/them pronouns in a sentence while you’re on her page performatively misgendering someone, then you aren’t embarrassed enough but I will feel embarrassed on your behalf. 

On a much, much, much happier note, baking with weed for older relatives is a love language. <3

And finally, on a very related note, I leave you with One Weird Trick your doctor won’t tell you for how to make sure you don’t forget which brownies are the special ones:

(Image ID: a white saucer containing two brownies. One is plain on top and the other is covered with a variety of rainbow sprinkles and colorful sugar.)

[catflowerqueen]

Actually, as an addendum to my last Chicory post about Pizza really leaning into the janitor thing… I can think of a semi-plausible way for that to happen. I mean. It has them straddling the border between sheer obliviousness and denial, but…

 Given how important the Brush and position of Wielder is, there have to be things like promotional materials, souvenirs, and, like, novelty brushes and things, right? Like, fake Brushes for kids to play with and pretend to wield (and Blackberry probably hates them, but there really isn’t anything she can do about it). So… Imagine a scenario where someone made giant fake Brushes for janitors to use in place of regular mops and brooms. Perhaps not even for “novelty” purposes, but because someone had the bright idea that literally everything in the Wielder Tower had to be art-themed or something. So Pizza is very used to wielding brushes as part of janitorial work.

I would also imagine that the colors and décor of the Tower—and possibly even Luncheon itself—change regularly just due to sheer proximity to the Wielder. That’s where they live, and likely where they would do a lot of their practice and experimenting. And since Pizza doesn’t have a transit card at the start of the game, they likely don’t get out too much and are used to fairly impermanent scenery.

Keeping that in mind… I could very easily see that, on the day of the color wipe, a somewhat more oblivious Pizza who genuinely thinks they made a cleaning mistake or something that wiped all the colors—perhaps spilling some sort of powdered cleaner, or laundry detergent, or actual flour or white powder that Chicory hadn’t felt like painting—comes across the Brush and mistakes it for one of their mops/brooms—because obviously Chicory would never let the actual Brush out of her sight, right? And with everything in black and white, it might genuinely be hard to tell that it isn’t one of their own tools. So they pick it up and commence with “cleaning”… and find that the color has returned. Sure, maybe it looks a little different than yesterday, but, remember, the Tower probably changes fairly often, so they assume that Chicory just did a little work on this recently.

So Pizza continues about their day, thinking that they are just doing the usual cleaning and not realizing that they are actually coloring things in on their own, and then heads outside.

And here is where the obliviousness/sheer stubborn denial comes in, when they see that everything else is also still in black and white and assume that either they or someone else just made a really big mess of powder/detergent/whatever. So then they just decide that, since they are a janitor—specifically the Wielder’s janitor, it is their job to clean up everything else, too, so that Chicory’s colors are visible again. And since, again, they don’t leave town much, they really don’t know/remember too much about the way that Chicory decorated the rest of Picnic (not to mention that Blackberry’s remnants probably would still have been around before the color wipe, even if things were in the process of fading naturally), they still don’t realize that they are actually putting their own colors and designs on display.

Well. Apart from places like the café or shops that ask you to design your own styles and things. They know they’re the ones doing that, but since a lot of those either have you do it in black and white anyways or specify that they use science to extract the colors and put them on food, they still don’t realize there’s anything special about it.

Anyone trying to call them the Wielder either gets brushed off (ha) or gets some sort of exuberant gushing over how “realistic” the “mop” must look since everyone keeps “mistaking it for the real Brush,” and, on the flip side of that, everyone else just thinks Pizza is being extremely humble or talking in metaphors when they call themselves a janitor, rather than a wielder. (And Blackberry and Radish are probably even more annoyed and confused by Pizza’s attitude than they were in canon. Like. Especially Blackberry).

Depending on how deeply into denial they end up being, the Brush can probably eventually start picking up some things and creating corruptions, but it is not going to be getting nearly the same extent because Pizza’s angst about art and “worthiness” would be far lower-key? At least initially. Like… more of it would probably come from dealings with the Art Institute and Radish, actually. Pizza would probably happily join classes at Clementine’s prompting, and then just see it as a way to get in some sibling bonding, and would only start becoming insecure when they hear that their paintings are getting put up in museums and different display areas, and then with the stuff Radish says and does. It would probably make them buckle down even more on the janitor issue, but in a less funny way and tone than before.

And I’m not entirely certain Pizza would ever realize they were holding the actual Brush the entire time. At least not until after everything was said and done and they were playing around with the new Brush they made—which they would know from the start was an actual Brush and not just a mop because they would have already learned about the Brush tree and the first Wielder and all that—and then realized that the colors and things being created were the same ones that were happening throughout the course of their “cleaning” earlier.

[mercuryislove]

Don’t hate me but… I kinda want you to answer all of the deep dive WIP asks 🥺 if that’s unreasonable tho, just 2, 9, and 10 please!

I am SORRY for the delay!!! i answered every question for BOTH projects so you're in for like.... several thousand words of shit that makes absolutely no sense, but i hope you you enjoy it! :)

1. Who are two characters that don't like each other? What do they reveal about each other to the readers? Will they ever learn to put aside their differences?

White Crane: okay this is hard because like. so many people do not like each other. (I know I made a post once about how terrible it would be to be one of twenty-eight people that have the power of dead gods but are trapped in stupid human bodies and you're all a thousand years old and hate each other so so so so so much because you all SUCK.) But for the sake of simplicity, I will talk about Ciaran and Sihla who never got along but only played nice to keep Anwei happy. They absolutely do NOT put aside their differences lmao once everything kind of, um, blows up between the three of them, all they want to do is KILL each other. She makes it her life's goal to make him suffer, and he basically loses his sanity in the process of trying to find a way to kill her for good. The beef is unbelievable. ANYWAY, what they reveal about each other is that Ciaran is not nearly as innocent in anything as he likes to pretend and Sihla is not as guilty as everyone says she is. I mean, she is still a terrible person in many ways, but that does not excuse the things he did to her all those years ago. She hates him for many, many good reasons.

Old Blood: Andhira HATES the entire Ekion family, but specifically the oldest son (who does not have an official name yet.... oops). He doesn't much care for her either but is usually too busy trying to better his social standing to worry too much about her. Except when they're in the same room together (which happens semi-regularly because her brother is kind of in love with him lmao). They hate each other for the exact same reason and it's that they're both SO arrogant. They look down on everyone around them (which in Andhira's case is like. fair. She's the firstborn of the two most powerful people on the planet, and the only person that comes close to that level of power is her twin brother who was born a mere fourteen minutes after her) but think the other is completely unjustified in their actions. Really all it reveals to a reader is that they both kind of suck and need to get over themselves because all that behavior does is make people resent you. They only put aside their differences because she does kind of need his help once or twice, but they would gladly spit in each other's face and/or push each other down a flight of stairs in the name of pettiness.

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2. What do you hope your readers will take away from your wip? Is there an intentional theme to the story?

These can be answered together! I started writing these stories because I wanted to have fun but they've both kind of morphed into a long-winded way of saying that like. it's okay to be messed up and hate yourself and have major internal struggles because there are people who still love you. I KNOW it doesn't sound like that from uhhhhhh literally everything I've ever said about this stuff but bear with me. The BIG theme is that love is EVERYTHING. All kinds of love. It's the reason to keep on going. You are never alone, even strangers can love you in their own way, etc etc etc etc. Also gay love fucking prevails always and forever.

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3. What do you love most about your protagonist?

Yixing is funny and weird and definitely a horse girl and he kind of sucks sometimes because he's stubborn as hell and has terrible people skills and maybe also a drinking problem, but he is kind and empathetic and despite the absolute hell he's lived through, he still sees the good in people and knows that it's easy to make mistakes and that most people deserve second chances in life. Also I like him because he is without a doubt the ideal man and I made him that way on purpose. And god I wish we could drink together. I'm talking stumbling drunk, crying on the bathroom floor, please-hold-my-hair-i'm-about-to-throw-up kind of drinking. We would have a great time being stupid together I think.

Vera is resilient and mean and stubborn and cold and off-putting and hard to get to know, and she sucks for those reasons but it's also why I love her so much. She has also lived through hell and it didn't make her try to see the good in people like Yixing does. It just made her bitter and resentful. She warms up over time, but she fights tooth and nail against it. I also love her so much because she is the archetype of like. the washed up former prodigy that has to return sort of against her will to her old life, and she realizes that she misses it in some ways but also remembers exactly why she left. I would Not want to drink with her (because she doesn't drink anymore), but I would love to take one of her art classes.

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4. Is there anything in the story that is implied but not directly stated? Will this become more relevant later on? How perceptive would a reader have to be to pick up on this?

White Crane: This is hard because I'm so invested in my own shit that it feels obvious to me, but I try to lay out a little candy trail that tells the reader that Ciaran and Anwei are Not What They Seem right from the start. It’s hard to explain without specific examples but it’s in the way they talk, they way they interact with other people, the way certain things they say don’t line up, etc etc etc. And there is a Big Hint of what will happen to Ciaran in the second and third installment, but idk if that counts. Also there are definitely implications that Yixing is trans but that's neither here nor there (honestly I’ve gone back and forth on whether or not he should be explicitly trans or if it should be left to reader interpretation because well... I don’t know if I'm capable of writing the nuance of transness because I'm not trans despite my complex and confusing relationship with gender but I'm also not a thirty-something year old Asian man NOR am I a god NOR am I a former vampire hunter NOR am I like. any of the things I write about other than a mean lesbian so. who knows?)

Old Blood: TRUE FANS already know this one, but regular degular readers that haven't participated in funny question friday or read my random late night posting would not immediately know that Josef and the Sovereign were once involved. Basically the only characters in the story that know are Josef, Luka, the Sovereign himself, and Tahire. But there are definitely some hints peppered throughout conversations and perhaps some photos and trinkets that Josef has kept after all this time... It has like no weight on the events of the story but I just think it's fun. Once again I am way too invested to know if it's easy to pick up on or not but I think it takes some theorizing about maybe? Other than that there aren’t any significant secrets.

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5. Which character has the most intricate backstory? Is this backstory common knowledge from the start, or is it revealed later on? How does the backstory affect the narrative?

White Crane: this is unfair because some of the characters are almost a thousand years old and some of them are like. 35. I DO have a full timeline written out of the thousand years of history that Ciaran and Anwei have lived through, if that counts as an answer. Like it doesn't have every single day and year, but it has all the big events for sure. Barring that, Yixing definitely has a pretty complex backstory. The man gets around lol and I try (and maybe fail?) to make him seem not too complex initially but then things get revealed and you learn more about him and are like “oh my god no wonder this man has Problems.” Also if he was like. “normal” and perhaps “well-adjusted” the story would not exist at all because he is the way he is and makes some of the stupid decisions he does because of his weird little life.

Old Blood: ONCE AGAIN, this is unfair because the Sovereign is like older than god. And Vera is 37. But like. I haven't fleshed him or any of the old ass vampires out nearly as much as Vera so there's your answer I guess? And I guess the important things are known from the start (that she was a prodigy, that she retired because terrible shit happened and she couldn't handle it, that she suffers from significant ptsd because of it, etc), but there is a lot of detail that doesn't come out until much later when she has to confront her Feelings (ewww feelings). Uh... the backstory affects the narrative because it wouldn't exist at all if Vera wasn't plagued by her fucked up blood nightmares lol

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6. Which two characters have the most complicated relationship? How does their relationship develop over time?

White Crane: Ciaran and Anwei totally. They love each other because they're brother and sister and were all the other had for a VERY long time (and even when they were still uh mortal, they relied on each other constantly), but also they hate each other because they're brother and sister. You know how it is with siblings. I love my brother and sister to pieces but I can't imagine being immortal and having to put up with the both of them for all eternity (sorry guys if you are reading this somehow.... I love you but we are all so annoying god bless). They handled their newfound godhood very, very, very differently and it kind of colors their relationship for the rest of time. There were times where they were extremely codependent and other times where they didn't speak to each other for DECADES. At the start of our story, they're on much better terms and have buried all their hatchets, but it doesn't take much for that to change....

Old Blood: Probably Vera and Andhira? They're only brought together because of their shared fucked up blood nightmares, and neither of them like that thought. They both resent the other for everything they are, and Vera is pretty much completely hostile to Andhira about it for a long time (and Andhira is only just barely cordial lol), but obviously a significant part of the plot revolves around them like. falling in love so they DO get over it after a while :)

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7. What is the most heart-wrenching scene in your wip? Why?

White Crane: When Yixing fucking DIES. I feel like this one should be self-explanatory. But I mean if you would like further explanation, it's unpleasant and slow and agonizing and nobody can do anything to stop it (haha....... unless?) so Ciaran gets to hold him for a long time and feel really bad about it lol

Old Blood: idk if there are any really heart-wrenching scenes but there are definitely some miserable and uncomfortable scenes like where Vera relives in vivid detail the days that she witnessed the gruesome deaths of her young apprentice and her last lover. They're upsetting because those are the two days that basically ruined her life (and one was the final straw that sent her spiraling completely out of control) and it's painful to watch her have to live with the guilt of what happened even if it wasn't her fault.

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8. What is a song that you associate with your wip? Explain.

White Crane: not to be basic but absolutely without a doubt in my stupid mind “Everybody Wants to Rule the World” by Tears for Fears lol it's because uh. well. Everybody wants to rule the world right? Basically way back in 2019 when I was crafting the ideas for the dnd campaign that became this thing instead, I was definitely having a metal gear moment (honestly I’m about to have a metal gear moment NOW lol) and was listening to a lot of like. mgs adjacent music and latched onto this song (and also promises, promises by naked eyes lmao) as some like thematic element. Like my brain making amvs. You know how it is. ANYWAY the point is. The concept was originally way different and was supposed to be more about the immediate aftermath of the so-called end of the world (yes Yixing was still there and yes he was still just some guy), and it focused a lot more on power struggles between all of these insane people that were granted godhood in the wake of the dying world. Which........ is something I'd like to write about at some point because it's intriguing in its own way but at the time I was unequipped to write about that when I really just wanted to write about people who are, for all intents and purposes, quite average getting caught up in the batshit drama of higher powers. (fun fact: Ciaran was supposed to be a tyrant king that ran a death cult and Anwei and Yixing were working together to figure out a way to kill him. Which is. Kind of what my dnd campaign is like now lol BASICALLY he's like if Big Boss was unkillable and could also rip souls out of people's bodies and eat them. I absolutely do not remember what this question originally was. Something about a song?)

Old Blood: THIS is the reason it took me so long to answer this whole thing. I thought long and hard and looked through all my playlists and listened to random songs that came to mind but it turns out the song I was looking for was right in front of me the whole time. DUH. It's “Golden Light” by Twin Shadow :) In my humble homo interpretation, I think it's a song about being afraid to fall in love and. Well. That's the whole point. Also #spoilers but the first time Vera sees Andhira and is like “oops I think I have feelings” is when they've just arrived at Andhira's home and the sun is rising and she looks over at her as they stand at the top of a hill and she has her eyes closed to the sun and she's bathed in golden light and OOUGGGGHGHHH poetic cinema. (honorable mention goes to “Groove is in the Heart” by Deee-lite because it’s quintessential early 90s music that Vera would be super into)

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9. What does your protagonist want most? What would they do to achieve this? What is something they wouldn't do to achieve this?

White Crane: Yixing wants to be happy for once. Like actually really happy instead of just. getting by. There's a scene where they're making wishes for the next seasons during the summer solstice and someone asks what he wants and he's like “uh I guess I want to still be alive at the end of the year?” and the other person is like “isn't that what everyone wants? Raise the fucking bar please. What do you REALLY want?” and he's stands there for a really long time and thinks about it before finally saying “I think I just want to be happy for once” and everyone else is like. wow. Way to kill the fucking mood dude. Anyway. He has had fleeting moments of happiness in his life but wants nothing more than to feel that way forever. It's kind of hard to say what he wouldn't do for that because like. there's not really much you CAN do in the first place, so I feel like there's even less you couldn't do. I guess he wouldn't like sell his soul to the devil or something lmao (though by being involved with Ciaran he's pretty much halfway there)

Old Blood: to be left alone. Vera just wants a normal life. She really truly does want to pretend that none of the horrible shit happened to her and that she was never a world-famous hunter. And she wants to teach art classes and live a quiet life!!! I mean, she is already mostly doing that exact thing when we first meet her, but obviously she has some hindrances (aka fucked up blood nightmares). She is begrudgingly helping Andhira because she assumes that will fix her problem and that she'll be able to get to that quiet living as soon as all is said and done. The only thing she really wouldn't do to get what she wants is like... live somewhere far away from Josef and Luka lol She likes having them close by more than she wants to be left alone.

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10. Within your story's world, were there any events that impacted every character (or most characters)? How would they be different if this event never happened? (Alternatively, erase an important even from on character's backstory and imagine where they'd be now.)

White Crane: well. If the stupid old gods didn't all kill themselves and almost end the world then I guess none of this story would exist lol But the actual answer is like. If Yixing had never run out on his girlfriend of ten years then he wouldn't have moved across the continent to Jengmi and wouldn't have made a name for himself way out there and wouldn't have been scouted and recruited and wouldn't have met Ciaran or Anwei and wouldn't have gotten in the middle of the batshit grudge between a bunch of ancient petty gay people and wouldn't have DIED and wouldn't have made one of the ancient petty gay people in particular lose his grip on his humanity via a lust for power in a desperate attempt to guarantee his safety and wouldn't have been the reason that tens of thousands of people die in his name and wouldn't have accidentally set off a chain of events that resulted in him having to hunt down and kill the Actual God that started it all in a fit of jealous rage. So like. maybe he should have just gone through with the wedding. All things considered, his life would have been way less stressful.

Old Blood: uhhh, that's tough because the stuff that happens only really has any effect on the mortal characters (I mean yeah people still try to kill the Sovereign but they're too dumb to know the ACTUAL way to kill him.... haha unless??), so it would be more like a what if Vera didn't witness the violent deaths of both her apprentice and her lover and have a full blown nervous breakdown and abandon her career? Well...... I think most things in the plot would transpire more or less the same, except she would be WAY less pissed off about it. In fact, she would probably be hyped as hell to get the chance to make the acquaintance of the Sovereign's family like Josef had before her. The thought of Vera being upbeat and not a sleep-deprived asshole that hates being dragged back to her old life..... ew. Not that I enjoy her suffering but you know what I mean. It just wouldn't be the same.

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11. What is something from your wip that you just really want to ramble about?

Are you sure you're ready for this. This is going to be so so so so long I'm sorry in advance. It's Saturday night and I'm alone and kind of sad so I'm just going to let loose.

As I hone down plot elements for next two installments in my little trilogy, I have kind of become obsessed with the passage of time and how different it must feel to someone that, well, lives forever. One of the ways I'd written (that has since been kind of changed) for Yixing to start to figure out what Ciaran really is was that he would casually be looking through his bookshelf and find an old photograph of Ciaran, Anwei, and their mom standing backstage together after one of his performances. And when he eventually asks Ciaran about it, he gets upset because how dare you touch the one thing I have left to remember my mother? To remember what my life used to be like? There are so many names and faces and places and foods and sensations that I've forgotten in the 940 years I've lived like this and I would give anything I have to see any of it just one more time because I didn't know that the last time I would ever speak to my mom we would have an argument on the phone about how I need to go to the temple and pray for good fortune on my birthday, or that the last time I would ever see my best friend would be at 6am when we both came into the studio to practice and he asked me to go out to breakfast and I said no because I thought a nap would be more important. And there are so many people that I've watched die whose names I never learned and whose faces I forgot the moment I turned away, and there are so many others that I loved so dearly that I had to leave behind because they grew old and I didn't. And I have lived lifetimes in solitude to keep myself a secret from other people and I have died more than any person should ever have to die and I have witnessed atrocities no one should ever witness and I hate everything about this life so much but I love everything about this life so much and I wouldn’t trade it for anything but I think I would give it all away in an instant if only to remember the scent of my mother's favorite perfume and I think I would give it all away in an instant if it meant I didn't have to watch you turn to dust in my arms.

ANYWAY. I think a lot about the agony of loving things that aren't permanent and how it really DOES drive you mad because lately I have been unbelievably nostalgic for certain things that weren't even that long ago but..... I didn't appreciate them at the time and I feel so guilty about it. (And like. I too would give up my entire life to be able to remember the scent of my grandmother's favorite perfume.) And all my pent-up sadness is for things that only happened in my childhood. I have pictures and videos and other people to share those memories with, but what does it feel like to be one of very few people that watched the entire world fall apart and rebuild itself and have nothing to hold onto from that time? What does it feel like to foster dozens of generations of children and outlive every single one of them? What does it feel like to have only fragments of memories of entire lifetimes? How lonely is it? I mean, Ciaran and Anwei have each other and that makes a difference but it still has to be the most isolating feeling. And then there's the pain that comes with memories that have faded or otherwise become hazy. I doubt either of them remember their father's face. They hadn't seen him in years even before it all happened. If it wasn't for that single photo he has, they wouldn't remember their mother's face either. Do they still remember her name? Or her birthday? Do they remember anyone else? Cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents, friends, coworkers? If they do, do they even want to talk about it? One thing I worry about in my own life (and this is how I know I have Problems) is that I'm so afraid that talking about memories will alter them somehow. There are so many things that I don't even like to share because once the words are spoken the little vhs tape that has all my memories has been recorded over, even if it's just by a single frame. Something about it has been changed forever each time I talk about it. Do they feel the same way and keep things to themselves instead of sharing the sadness? I think maybe they used to talk about the “old days” or whatever much more often back in the past, but as the years went by.... they just learned to keep it to themselves.

I think maybe I have a lot of anxiety about the passage of time and of being forgotten!

Anyway again. The passage of time drives me insane. And I think it would make me even more insane if I had been chosen to carry the mantle of a dead god and would live forever. My dog died a year ago and I still cry like every single day thinking about her. If I was doomed to live forever I don't know how the sadness wouldn't swallow me whole! No wonder all the people in this book are fucking CRAZY!!

And don't even get me started on the Sovereign lol he's like “oh boo-hoo you've lived for not even a thousand years? Bitch they hadn't invented fucking GLASS yet when I was born. The horse wasn't domesticated yet. Cry harder!!”

[infiniteoddball]

A/n: Chapter One . I know I don’t usually switch POV’s in stories, but for this story, it feels quite relevant and needed. This story is going to be heavily based in Angst & some happiness and smartassery here and there. (In exciting news! this marks my 1,000 post!)  Tags: Angst; Hints at Sex: Talks of possible sexual abuse  Tagging: @storiesofsvu​ @svushots @barsonaddict @wall1418 @vivis-ghost-wife @teyamarra 

Olivia sat across from Barba, pushing her food around her plate. She didn’t know what to say about her earlier conversation, or if she should even bring it up. Rita’s words sat heavily in her conscious. She didn’t know what to make of it. She knew she could possibly be going down a rabbit hole, or she might be right. She took a sip of her wine, but still stayed silent.

“Okay, spill. What is going on?” He quipped.

“Nothing...I mean...” Olivia sighed, “It’s just, this conversation that I had with Rita is not sitting well with me. It feels like she confessed something but didn’t at the same time.”

“Olivia,” He evenly said, “What are you talking about? I am completely lost here.” 

“You know Rita better than me. Why did she leave the district attorney’s office?” Olivia looked up at him, wondering why she was thinking so heavily into this.

“Why are you asking? What conversation?”

“She said something to me today that makes me think she left because of abuse,” She bit her lip, pushing her semi-full plate away, “I mean-What she said was concerning to me. I have never seen her so small. She has never been that sloppy in court...” Olivia’s words drifted off as she slipped into her thoughts.

“Liv,” Rafael snapped his fingers to pull her attention back, “Rita? Sloppy? What are you talking about? Hello?” He took her hand into his, running his thumb over her knuckles, “Talk to me.”

Olivia blushed, turning her hand upwards as she grazed her fingers over his wrist, “Okay. I have never seen Rita, in all these years, threatened to be held in contempt of court. Have you ever seen that happen with her? I mean, not only that, but Carisi told me that she was semi-combative with the judge. I am pretty sure that didn’t help Chip Gallagher. Also, I mean, I have seen her be hostile with witness, but only ever when she has asked to treat them like a hostile witness. However, something just...I honestly don’t know if I am overthinking this. ”

Rafael shook his head, “Never. But why are you asking about her leaving the district attorney? Does this have to do with the conversation you had with her?” 

“Today, I was in the elevator with her. I asked her why she was still defending men like Chip Gallagher. She said if I didn’t get on the proper side that my career would become marginalized. Normally, that isn’t something that bothers me, but it was the way that Rita said it. She said it as if it was a warning that she shouldn’t be giving. More so, it was the last thing she said to me that got me. She said, verbatim, ‘my advice...lie back and pretend you’re enjoying it.’ I got a chill down my spine. It was almost like she shrunk by two inches after she said that.” Liv looked up at Rafael, “What do you think? Maybe this might not be anything, but she also wasn’t wearing her normal tailored suits. What she was wearing was kind of baggy on her.”

“Rita left the District Attorney after losing a case that would have been hard on anyone. She fought harder than I ever saw her fight. She wanted justice for her victim that she was defending, but she lost. She seemed very disconnected, disillusioned and quite frankly? Emotional. Especially since she was very close with the victim. It was the first and last time I saw her connect past a professional relationship with a victim, or currently known as a client.” Rafael sighed heavily, “She never disclosed to me if that is what you are getting at. As far as I know, there were no disclosures or firings for abuse of power the year that she left, but I can always check for you.” Rafael stated.

Olivia leaned forward, resting her chin in her hand, “Am I overthinking this?”

Rafael leaned forward, pausing as he kissed her briefly, “With what you have right now, I would call it circumstantial, but in all my years I have known you, you have never been wrong about these kinds of things. Why are you second guessing yourself now?”

“Because it’s Rita Calhoun. For as long as I have known Rita Calhoun, this is completely out of her realm of behavior. Wait, you said she was connected with the victim? What was the case?”

“I don’t know Liv. That was years ago. Look, all I can remember is she was almost charged with contempt. Then that night, she told me over a glass of bourbon that she put her notice in effective immediately. A few weeks later, I was facing her in court.” Rafael shrugged.

“Contempt? Rafi, I know I am grasping for straws, but this has got to be connected. Was she close to anyone else?”

“Liv,” Rafael cupped her cheeks, tilting her head upwards, “Rabbit hole. You are grasping for straws. Why don’t you talk to her? She disclosed something to you. Or she was warning you. Either way, you need to talk to her before you go jumping to conclusions, because clearly, whatever it is that she is trying to tell you is important and it will effect you one way or another.”

“Rafael I am not-“

Her words were cut short as Rafael pulled her in for a long, languid kiss. He slowly pulled away, “Let’s go to bed before you get too far in.” He grinned.

—————————————

Olivia threw the covers back, getting up nearly an hour before her alarm would be going off. She stood, pulling her shirt and panties on before she made her way to the bathroom. She managed to sleep a few hours since Rafael had worn her out, but this...it just wasn’t sitting well with her. Everything that Rafael had told her was making her mind race. 

She flicked the handle upwards on the sink, getting herself a glass of water before making herself comfortable on Rafael’s couch. She sipped her drink slowly, thinking about Rita. She sighed deeply, massaging her temple. She felt her stomach clench. She knew, deep down, Rita wasn’t a person that got sloppy. She knew that she wasn’t crazy. Something happened to Rita. 

She glanced at the clock, sighing with the fact that it was only six am. She dropped head against the back of the couch as she sank further into the comfortable fabric. She finished her drink before standing. She grabbed one of his legal pads before sitting at his desk, “She was admitting something to me,” She mumbled.

By the time Olivia had to get ready for work, she had a basic timeline sketched out. She also had written down any names of judges, current or present, that were known for their abuse. Olivia was so lost in thought that she nearly screamed as Rafael grazed his lips along her neck. 

“When did you get up?” 

“A couple of hours ago,” She said honestly, flipping the notepad over, “I need to get going, I will call you when I can come over again,” She gave him a hurried kiss before leaving him in the dining room to get dressed. 

*** “Rita!” Olivia called as she ran down the courthouse steps, “Hey! Got a minute?” 

Rita glanced over her shoulder, feeling her stomach clench, “Benson, not really. I am headed to meet a client.” 

Olivia drank in the fact that she was wearing a tailored pants suit, “I can walk and talk,” She stated as she caught up with Rita, “I just wanted to ask you a question!” Olivia gently touched Rita’s arm to catch her attention, “Why did you leave the district attorney?” 

Rita felt her stomach drop as she turned to face Olivia, “Why are you asking me about this?” 

“Because you are hiding something,” Olivia bluntly stated, “You admitted something to me in that elevator. What I can’t figure out if it was intentional or to protect me.” 

Rita looked over her face, knowing she was screwed. The past was finally coming to haunt her, “I regularly go up against you in court defending rapists, and criminals. Now, you are questioning why I am doing this?” 

“Yes.” 

Rita rubbed her temple, turning away from her, “I have to go. I don’t have time for this.” 

Olivia grabbed her elbow, standing in front of her, “Clearly you do if you were acting so out of character to the point you basically insinuated that I should turn a blind eye to corruption. What happened?” She questioned. 

Rita felt her nostrils flare as she took a deep breath, “I grew close to a victim named Natalie Burse and I promised her that I would win her case. A case that broke the both of us. Are you done with your witch hunt now?!” She snapped. 

Olivia dropped her arm, “I have more questions. Call me when you can,” She stated as she stepped out of her way. Olivia waited until she was around the corner before she called Fin, “Hey, I need you to dig up everything that you can with a victim by the name of Natalie Burse.”  

[a-dragons-journal]

I identify as a creature from the Star Wars universe. I don’t know if people would be interested in me making a blog on here for it or not. Do you think it would be interesting? I don’t know how many Star Wars related otherkin there are on here.

I think it’s less important to ask if other people would be interested and more important to ask if it’s something you want to do and are interested in. If you’re interested and invested in what you’re posting, people will find you who are also interested - don’t change your whole blog to try and chase popularity; it’ll just feel paper-thin and kind of false to you and everyone else.

(If you need proof of that, that’s exactly what I did - made a personal journaling blog because I wanted to keep a timestamped record of my thoughts and experiences and interact with the community, without any thought to whether other people would be interested - and I’m currently at upwards of 1800 followers, somehow.)

I also don’t know how many Star Wars ‘kin folk there are here, to be honest; I know there’s a Rey who posts in the tags semi-regularly but I can’t find their URL right now for some reason. I don’t really run in fictionkin circles, so I’m afraid I don’t know their population as well. Best way to find out is probably to just start posting about your experiences, whatever you want to share, and to keep tabs on the fictionkin and star wars kin tags. (Again, I don’t run in fictionkin circles, so I’m not totally sure what the standard format for “[source media] kin” tags is as far as spaces and all that goes, sorry. I recommend trying a couple variations and seeing which is the most active.)

Any Star Wars ‘kin who have something more to add for anon? Feel free to reply or reblog! (Anon, I recommend keeping tabs on the notes on this post; I may or may not reblog responses.)

[hillbillyoracle]

Six of Swords Circle: A Proposal

So I’ve reached a point in my work where in order to continue serving folks like I have tried to, I’ll need to work with others. Last year, I really enjoyed offering Shadow Work classes on a free and pay-what-you-can basis. But the minute I crashed, the whole thing ground to a halt. What I’d like to do is:

help set up a group that can work even if I am tending to an emergency

establish a space with a focus on spiritual nourishment over skill acquisition 

serve more folks than I could on my own and connect others to an opportunity to serve a community they otherwise couldn’t

So here’s my proposal. I will help coordinate a group to meet weekly on Sundays at 8pm EST on Zoom. 

Order of Events

Welcome + Announcements

Brief words of welcome, reminding people of the norms, and any important announcements

Card to Center [Individual]

I or a Tech will play music while people center, shuffle cards, and draw a card for what they personally can get from the service and focus on throughout.

Opening Literary Readings

I individually or in collaboration with a Reader will select a poem or passage from any relevant text (poetry, novels, song lyrics, etc) to read aloud before the talk.

Talk [20-30 minutes]

I or a Speaker will prepare a talk on any tarot related topic with an emphasis placed on what is spiritually fulfilling rather than what is technical and furthers a particular skill. This may include meditations on specific cards, spreads, or combinations or personal reflections on aspects of their tarot reading practice with relevance to the wider group.

Silent Meditation [10 minutes]

I or a Tech will play soft music while the circle sits with the message of the talk quietly for 10 minutes.

Joys + Sorrows

I or a Moderator will lead the circle in sharing their personal joys and sorrows. People will raise their hand or respond in the chat that they'd like to share. I or the volunteer will call on people in the order they respond. No crosstalk will be allowed. Each person should try to keep their sharing to around 3 minutes.

Card for the Congregation [Collective]

I or a Cardist will shuffle cards and draw one card for the circle as a whole and offer their thoughts on how it relates to what we should focus on in the coming week.

Closing Literary Reading

I or a Reader will read a second reading from a relevant text.

This order of events very loosely follows that of Unitarian Universalists, a humanist religion focused on the free and responsible search for truth.

Suggested Daily Practice

Totally optional but I thought this is how I would use the meeting in my daily practice: Keep the Card to Center and the Card for the Congregation up where you can see them and draw a third card each day. Meditate on or journal the reading. Pray a prayer and/or form an intention related to the reading. Spend a moment in gratitude. Offer something back (water for spirits, money or acts of service to fellow people).

Small Groups 

In addition to regular weekly circle meetings, I’d like to provide a way for people to form small groups where they can select a text they’d like to read together and meet regularly to discuss it. 

Volunteers Needed

Moderators

Moderators would help manage the chat during a service and run any Discord the community would want to get set up. This is the role I am most in need of because I am a terrible moderator. I would greatly appreciate people who know how to set up a server, bots and all, and write clear guidelines for behavior norms. 

Techs

I’m pretty good at running Zoom by myself but in cases where another person is presenting the talk, a Tech would be helpful to have to run the Tech side of things in case the Speaker can’t. 

Speakers

I could really use people who’ve been working with tarot deeply and writing/speaking about it to swap in and out with so I can take breaks. Pro if you have some public speaking experience but no pressure if that’s still new. Would want to see some of your tarot writing. 

Readers

Readers bring their knowledge of various texts to help express the main message of the talk in a different and hopefully helpful way. Ideal person would be someone who reads widely and collects notes on materials they really loved. 

Cardists

Ideal this is someone who’s been reading for others for quite some time and can quickly and succinctly summarize cards in a relevant way. Open to seeing what level of skill it actually requires, but will probably start with folks who’ve been reading for others for a while. 

Transcriptionist

It would be amazing if we could offer transcriptions of most circle meetings live. I really enjoyed the method of having it be transcribed live in a google doc with the link given at the beginning of the presentation. But recording and transcribing afterwards could still be good too. 

Wanna help make this happen?

Please reach out to me, either on here or email me at hillbillyoracletarot@gmail.com, if you’re willing to volunteer for a position. Include if you have any relevant experience. Please reply to this post if you’d likely attend meetings semi-regularly. I just want to get a vibe for what the interest level is like. If there’s not much, no hard feelings, I know folks are really going through it. But if there is enough, I’d really like to try to make it happen. 

[vulturepunk]

a follow-up to my previous post-- kind words are nice and all, but here’s some solid advice that got me through the last ten years of serious depression

get yourself a stack of candy bars and tell yourself that if you get through the day, you can eat one of them. you don’t have to do anything “productive” to deserve that reward; it’s just a reward for surviving, because god knows that’s hard enough.

your floor is probably trashed. pick up one (1) thing and put it where it belongs-- trash can, laundry hamper, whatever. if you find that you can do more than that, awesome!!! if not, still awesome! you are one thing closer to having a clean living space. be proud of yourself.

i know cooking for yourself is impossible, but do try to eat semi-regularly, okay? i like to get a big head of broccoli and a bunch of ramen and break the broccoli up into the ramen. sometimes i add half a can of beans too. it’s not gourmet cooking, but it’s protein and vegetables and water, all things you need. 

fuck schoolwork. you fail a class, you need to repeat a grade, so what. staying alive and taking care of yourself is more important. (note: if you have abusive parents or some other situation that makes doing badly in school Unsafe for you, then ignore this point, but if not, seriously, fuck school)

reach out to people. tell your friends, your parents, your friend’s parents, whoever. don’t go quietly. scream until someone helps you.

dry shampoo and wet wipes are your friends

get out of bed at least once a day. it’s okay if you just go sit in the living room. it’s okay if you just sit on the floor next to your bed. just, get up, get out. don’t stagnate.

driving in circles with loud music is good for the soul.

talk to your school about accommodations if you’re too anxious or depressed to make it to class or complete schoolwork or take tests or do presentations. they may or may not be helpful, and i understand that you’re not in the best place to advocate for yourself right now, but do try.

remember that every day you survive is a victory

[warsmith-38]

How I would do RWBY pt.3

Season Three

Tournament a go-go

RWBY, JNPR, SSSN, CFVY, CEMN, and some others win their starter rounds against some jobbers because important characters.

Cinder and Ruby have lunch to celebrate their mutual victories.

Have been having lunch together regularly.

Penny crashes the party in more glorious awkwardness.

Cinder quietly analyses a potential problem and/or opportunity in evil plan and tries to make nice along the way.

Ozpin starts to act gloomier than usual.

Blames a gut feeling he has.

Qrow shows up.

Everyone gives him a wide berth out of fear.

He is a massive fucking dork who is nowhere near as cool as he acts or his reputation implies.

Yang and Ruby are happy to see their uncle.

Weiss and Blake are wondering how this dork has such a badass reputation.

CEMN have little strategy meeting as to how Qrow might fuck up the evil plan.

Mysterious benefactor (Salem) tells them to go through with it hell or high water.

Second round of tournament.

Penny and Ciel deck Coco and Fox.

Yang and Weiss take down Sun and Sage.

Pyrrha and Jaune lose to Neo and Cinder, with Neo only contributing as much as is polite.

Pyrrha’s magnetism doesn’t work on Cinder’s glass/obsidian/whatever bow-sword.

Ozpin reveals to Pyrrha that he not only always knew about Jaune’s cheating into the academy but purposely rigged the bracket to put her and Jaune against people he knew they had a disadvantage to.

Wants both of them free to work for him and not be distracted by the tournament.

Also reveals that he knows Cinder and team are agents of Salem (Even namedrops Salem).

Says that Qrow is here to snatch her at the earliest and quietest convenience and question her about Salem’s plan.

Cinder is more slippery than anticipated.

Never gives an easy target and uses her befriending of Ruby to give herself a sort of buffer between her and Qrow.

Pyrrha is brought into fold against Salem on the grounds that she’s, on paper, the best student at the academy and Ozpin is desperate for hitters.

He’s holding off on Jaune for now to further test his competency and loyalty.

Plans to also bring Ruby into the fold, but is also holding off for reasons he won’t talk about.

Pyrrha is told to keep secrets but Jaune quickly sees that something is up and tells the rest of team about his suspicions.

Says he recognized disguised Neo’s fighting style from old crime surveillance footage and things Yang has said about her fight with her on the train.

Pyrrha is very conflicted but Ozpin orders her to try and keep Jaune quiet.

Yang vs Mercury.

Mercury takes his dive and Emerald fucks with Yang’s perception, making her ‘cripple’ Mercury.

Crowd is already upset that famous Pyrrha lost, is now rowdy at poor sportsmanship.

Yang is detained but is quickly told by Ironwood and Qrow that they know she was set up and are in the process of making things right.

Team CEMN is allowed a rematch against another team due to RWBY getting disqualified.

Cinder vs Penny.

Plan is Penny is going to tire Cinder out, win/lose, and after the match Qrow will snatch Cinder to interrogate her.

Ruby, naively, cheers on both of her friends, trying to ignore the problems of the last match.

Cinder kills Penny.

Like, Mortal Kombat fatality style. It’s only PG-13 because it’s being done to a robot.

Ruby gets BSOD’d.

Cinder gives big evil public speech while rest of her team hacks the robots and security measures into attacking people.

Horde of Grimm shows up and Cinder disappears.

Ozpin nabs P+J and tells them that shit is popping off and, while the grimm are manageable, Salem’s agents are the real issue.

Gets cut off by an arrow going into his neck.

Cinder tells him that that arrow is from Salem herself. Made from her bone and blood.

Ozpin drops like a sack of potatoes.

Cinder fights Jaune and Pyrrha.

Cinder’s already proven that she can kick their asses so she starts kicking their asses.

Pyrrha sends Jaune away to fight Cinder alone.

Jaune meets rest of team, says what’s going on as fast and succinctly as he can.

Adam and White Fang show up to cause more problems.

Yang and Blake start fighting White Fang members.

Weiss finds Ruby and breaks her out of her BSOD.

Make quick plan to shut down robots.

Neo has busted Roman out of jail and are now both directing robot attacks from Comm. tower.

Ruby and Weiss get to tower through waves of robots and fight Roman and Neo.

Takes some effort, but Roman and Neo are down for the count.

Cinder remotely primes a bomb to stop the robots from being used by the good guys again.

Roman realized that he was set up.

Neo is shocked but is knocked away to safety.

Ruby and Weiss cheese it before the boom.

Roman goes boom.

Blake and Adam have brief fight.

Adam kicks the crap out of her.

Yang and Adam have brief fight.

Yang, due to her uncontrolled rage mode, technically has a higher power level than Adam but do note the ‘uncontrolled’ part.

Adam is able to outmaneuver and outwit her and proceeds to cut her arm off.

Blake sneaks the both of them away from Adam as he’s reveling in the carnage.

Ruby see big fire coming from Ozpin’s tower.

Cinder isn’t even fighting anymore.

She’s just sadistically playing with Pyrrha.

Ruby arrives just in time to see Cinder get bored and incinerate Pyrrha.

Ruby BSODs again.

Breaks out of it to fight Cinder.

Cinder is final boss of season. Is also a ‘destined to lose’ kind of boss fight.

Cinder starts taunting her while kicking the crap out of her.

Says that it was all a lie, their friendship was just a tool, her whole reason for being there was to try and kill Ozpin, calls her an idiot, et cetera.

Cinder has won this fight.

Is about to finish Ruby Mortal Kombat style.

Ruby’s eyes explode in a blast of white fire.

Wakes up at home.

Tai is super happy his daughter is safe.

Says that JNR and CFVY rescued her from white fire hellscape that was once Ozpin’s office.

Qrow tells her that she has unlocked her second semblance.

It’s the same one that Summer had.

It’s a little different. Less fine control, but more raw power.

World is shocked at the events of Beacon.

Vale is almost post-apocalyptic now.

Main city is semi-stable but damage to outer areas is immense.

Grimm are everywhere and hunters are stretched thin.

Ozpin was later found miraculously alive.

Yang tells Ruby that Blake has run off like a punk-bitch (she’s a bit miffed at that) and Weiss got taken back home.

Ruby tries (poorly) to keep a positive outlook.

Yang rebukes her and calls her a naïve idiot.

Tells her to grow up and accept that shit will never really improve.

Ruby is trying her hardest to keep it together.

It is worse for knowing and losing than simply never having.

She is once again stuck at home with overprotective dad but now with callous and depressed sister.

This is on top of watching her new best friend murder her other new best friend, losing pretty much all of her other friends, watching part of her home and kingdom getting wrecked, and her father didn’t buy any of her favorite ice cream.

Tai goes for groceries.

Ruby takes a moment to try and calm down in her room.

She doesn’t.

Demolishes her room in an enraged fit.

Breaks down sobbing her eyes out.

Ruby is full of various negative emotions about the circumstance she is in.

If there wasn’t already a very dense core of grief and pain centered around Beacon, she would be attracting grimm.

Yang wants to comfort Ruby but her own depression and self-apathy stops her.

Ruby sees on the TV that problems are mounting in Mistral and uses that as the justification she needs.

Ruby runs away from home that night, alone, armed, and Mistral bound.

Season three done.

School arc done.

[scandalsavagefanfic]

DC Kink Meme Prompts List

Since the kink meme is getting a lot of attention and growing daily, I thought I’d post a convenient place where I can keep track of the prompts that I’d like to see filled again. I figure you’re all here because we share similar interests and this way, if you’re a writer with looking for a prompt, you don’t have to scroll through the almost 400 prompts that are currently posted. 

So here we go. Beware, this is a kink meme. These are nsfw and some may be triggering. 

JayDick Watersports -  Filled HERE

sub!Jason & Dom!Dick are in a consensual D/s relationship that has a heavy Master/slave dynamic (whether 24/7 or primarily during sex is up to you!). They're on a stakeout one night, and it's really cold, and, aw, fuck, Dick needs to piss, but he doesn't want his dick to freeze. Good thing he's got his bitch there with him, right? Dick pissing in Jay's ass preferred just to show the level of not caring about Jay's comfort [it's still cold!], but totally not gonna complain about piss drinking, either, if Dick's feeling a little more charitable. Is Jay surprised because it's the first time Dick has done this? Is this a normal, expected duty that he performs regularly? That's up to you!

Tim/Jason A/B/O - Filled

In an A/B/O world where omegas are in charge and alphas are treated like animals, or kept as pets, CEO Tim decides to treat himself to a new toy and buys Jason. Feel free to go as wild as you like with the kinks, I'm pretty unsquickable

Tim/Jason Stalker!Tim - Filled on the Meme by anon and HERE (by me)

Older Tim, younger Jason, where Tim's stalking gets a little obsessive once Jason takes over as Robin, and he starts stalking Jason out of costume as well as at night. A little judicious hacking later and he's able to keep an eye on Jason's internet activity too. Once he finds Jason looking at gay porn he knows he's got an in. And he starts blackmailing Jason, online at first, but escalating every time he gets Jason to go a little further, until he gets him to submit in person.

Slade/Dick/Jason - Filled amazingly HERE

Dick's been with Slade for a while, and now that he's stopped fighting and given into his training, Slade thinks he deserves a reward. Every good boy deserves a puppy, and Batman's new Robin looks like he could fit the role perfectly.

Jason Todd - Object Insertion - Filled on the meme (art)

Honestly, that's all I've got for you. I just want someone making Jason take things up his ass that have no business being there. Consensual or not are both fine! Any ship, though definitely a strong preference for Roy, Slade, Tim, Kyle, Dick, Roman or Ra's. Preferably not underage, but I'm not entirely opposed.

Ra's/Jason - Filled HERE

Ra's test drives an undunked Jason. The boy must be useful for something, after all, and he looks so pretty in chains. ABO welcome. 

Prompt- Pegging (Jason) - Filled HERE

Jason gets pegged by one (or more ;)) of the lovely ladies of the DC universe. And enjoys it thoroughly Pairing is dealer's choice. <3

Bruce/Jason 

Bruce takes in Jason off the streets, but more for use as a personal whore than to be Robin. Bonuses for Bruce still adopting Jason and getting off on fucking his son. EXTRA bonus points for Alfred's unfazed acceptance/support of it and perhaps even his participation.

Jason Todd Intercrural Sex - Filled on meme

This man deserves more thigh fucking and so do we! All ships welcome!

No Title - Bruce/Jason, Dick finds out Bruce has been sexually abusing Jason

One of the other prompts made me realize that while there are a lot of fics where Jason discovers Bruce has been abusing Dick, there are none the other way around and suddenly I have a craving. So I would like for Dick to find out (maybe right after Jason returns, Dick catches them and overhears Bruce say something to indicate it used to happen regularly) that Bruce had been sexually abusing Jason since the moment he found him and try to save him. And like, because of his background as a child prostitute, Jason kind of thinks it's normal or that it's the only way he could earn love? Maybe Bruce implies that Jason is useless otherwise and he'd end up back on the streets if he's not useful. Maybe Bruce is even happy to point out that the reason he never even considered touching the others is because they were too good for it, pure and wholesome, while Jason was ruined goods.

Dick/Jason fuck-or-die bottom!Jay 

I would absolutely kill to see a fic where Dick is forced to fuck Jason (for whatever reason but preferably not due to sex pollen/aphrodisiacs/drugs - I would prefer if they were both in their right minds please) Preferably they wouldn't be in a relationship or have secret feelings for each other and this would be mutual noncon/rape with a focus on how horrified they are that they're having to do this to each other. I would really, really like if it was bottom!Jason for this, but that there is acknowledgement that Dick is being raped here too!

Skeezy Ric Grayson

One specific fic I read has completely coloured my perception of Ric, and now I'm just desperate to see him being a total creep. Perving on his siblings and former friends. Would love to see him not take no for an answer, especially with someone who doesn't want to fight back because "it's still Dick in there somewhere, I can't hurt him" or something like that. Preference for Wally (HiC who?) or Jason, but Tim, Roy, Babs or Donna would be okay, too! A/B/O with Alpha!Ric would be a bonus but isn't necessary.

Cassie/Rose bondage spanking and D/s, semi-dubious consent

Cassie has had enough of Rose mouthing off and causing trouble, so she ties her up with her lasso and lectures her. Rose mockingly asks her if she’s going to spank her for being a bad girl, and much to her surprise, Cassie does. They both enjoy it much more than expected

Nyssa/Talia

Nyssa/Talia, set post-Death and the Maidens, Talia restrained while Nyssa gets her off, begging to be allowed to reciprocate. Bonus points for twisty fucked up Nyssa POV with all kinds of big global megalomaniacal justifications for what she's doing and how important it is to the greater good. (Reposted from old DC kinkmeme)

Jason Todd/Dick Grayson/Roy Harper/Koriand’r

Kori loves watching her subs play with each other and rewards them well for good behavior

JayTim hatesex

Jason and Tim having incestuous-sibling-rivalry-hate-sex against the memorial

Any Bats/???, Alfred has to clean up

Poor Alfred often gets stuck cleaning up the mess when any of the family bring partners over. The crackier the circumstances the better!

Slade/Jason identity porn

Slade and Jason fuck while in costume as and pretending to be Batman and Nightwing respectively

Kyle Rayner/any

Kyle winds up working as a stripper somehow. Some other heroes find out and pay him a visit

Batfam/Jason; non con or resigned-to-his-fate cumdumpster!Jason

Could also be Earth-3 Owlfam/Jason. A/B/O welcome but it doesn't have to be. Would appreciate any one or combination of the following: dehumanization/objectification, humiliation, public sex, breeding kink, restraints, fucking machines, cum enemas, lots of cum in general, size kink... I just want something unapologetically filthy. I'm pretty much good with everything but scat.

Dick/Tim non/dub-con, universe hopping

Dark Dick from a dark universe ends up in the main universe, where he is delighted to find a brand new Timmy to play with, who unconditionally trusts his brother and doesn't know he's been replaced. Cue Dick slowly luring him in so he can have his fun. Tim doesn't realize until it's too late, or doesn't realize at all and has no idea how his beloved older brother could do this to him. Main universe has fully platonic, familial relationships within in the batfam. Feel free to imply/state anything you like about the dark universe. Grooming/slowly warming Tim up to more and more touches, crying, overstimulation, bondage, or any combination thereof are all bonuses

Young Justice S3 Dick/Jason omegaverse

Alpha!Dick Grayson is stuck on a mission and somehow has to help the mysterious Red-Hooded omega through his heat. But they have to stay quiet in order to not wake the pup Damian sleeping right next to them. Preferably there's an identity reveal in there where Dick finds out the omega is Jason Todd under the mask.

Addict!Roy Harper Noncon

Noncon (or possibly dubcon, if the manipulation is clear enough to readers) with Snowbirds Don't Fly era!Roy Harper as the victim. Could be an OC, another Titan, a Leaguer, a canon villain... Dealer's choice! Looking for something that really focuses on how he's being taken advantage of, rather than just "can't technically consent because he's high, but is totally into it."

Woder Woman/Batman, Rough Sex

Bruce loves it when Diana is rough with him

Bane/Bruce, violent noncon

Something set during Knightfall, where Bane decides to take “breaking the Bat” even further by raping Bruce and possibly also his precious little Robin

Jay/Tim bdsm AU, sub Jay

What it says on the tin. Was thinking maybe also an arranged marriage of sub Jason to dom Tim Drake, to cement a business union but also because subs aren’t full citizens.

Robin!Jason/Bruce Somnophilia

Bruce drugs his new little Robin and slips into his room. He takes his time with him, enjoying Jason before carefully opening and fucking him. Would be great if Jason wakes up towards the end but can't do anything but take it- maybe because of the drugs, maybe because of the way Bruce is holding him down, or even because he likes it.

Sidekicks/Villains noncon glory wall

Any sidekicks you want—Speedy, the Robins and Batgirls, Kid Flash and Impulse, the Wonder girls, etc.—being displayed in a glory wall, leaving their holes open for fucking. Interested villains can pay to fuck any hole they desire, and they enjoy wrecking the sidekicks and filling them with come

Robin!Jason/Villains & Henchmen?

Robin Jason gets captured and tied up by the villain of the week, who decides to take advantage of the situation. Robin is blindfolded and groped/fucked by the villain and maybe some henchmen while waiting for Batman to rescue him. Batman finding a bound and blind Jay too tempting to resist is a bonus.

Dickjay daddy kink

Older! Dick and bottom! Jason. Jason came back years later and Dick is around 40.

OmegaJason/Batfam first heat, lactation

It's Jason's first heat and the alphas of the pack know that his milk is on its way soon. All it needs is a little encouragement. A few knots and some nipple play should do it. His milk tastes perfect as it starts to flow.

Jason/Dick, Jason/RomanSionis, Hooker!Jason & Officer Grayson

So this is based off a discussion from AGES ago in the jayroman discord server that I still think about to this day XD A no capes au in which Jason never gets picked up by Bruce and ends up a crime alley prostitute who somehow along the way caught the eye of Black Mask and winds up working for him. And Black Mask has basically the whole city in his pocket, including the police force, which is why it’s so annoying when this little upstart, Officer Dick Grayson, starts to try to challenge his hold on the city, the little goody two-shoes denying any and all bribes and refusing to back down in the face of threats. And it should be easy to squash one annoying little bug, but somehow all attempts have failed and he can’t openly go after him without risking his reputation as a clean, law-abiding businessman, a reputation that’s slowly starting to unravel thanks to the dogged efforts of Officer Grayson, because the little shit is annoyingly not as stupid as his attempts to go after Roman would make him seem and despite all of Roman’s power and having basically the entire police force and the various other government officials Roman has in his pocket against him, he has made far too much headway in his endeavors So Roman gives Jason the job of seducing Dick, because if bribery and threats don’t work, video evidence of an officer fucking an underage hooker makes excellent blackmail material, and should be enough to take him down for good if he ever steps a toe out of line again Except no matter how Jason tries to seduce him, Dick is just too decent a guy to take advantage (Ex: Jason: *shows up wearing even more revealing clothes than the night before.* Dick: “You must be cold, here, take my jacket.” etc.) And before he knows it, Jason finds himself growing weirdly fond of the infuriating idiot with his stupid puns and painful sincerity

Roman Sionis/Jason Todd, AOB noncon impregnation gang rape

Intersex AOB verse. Roman wants to punish and claim the upstart omega, so he plugs Jason’s cunt and lets his men anally rape Jason until the omega begs Roman to breed his pussy

TimKon, a/b/o, alpha!Tim, bottom Conner

Humans have a/b/o. Kryptonians do not. Alpha!Tim thinks that he shouldn't bother Kon about Tim's rut. Kon thinks otherwise. Whether Kon can keep up with Tim (superpowers got to be good for something, right?) or is overwhelmed is up to anon :) I am absolutely unsquickable so whatever extra kinks are fine with me. Just please top!Tim only. Please, my crops are dying.

past romanjay now mobJay, gangbang

After getting tired with his new toy, Roman decided to just give his subordinates a chance to have fun with it. But mostly he just want to see the red hood to get more humiliated after destroying his empire.

Damian Wayne/Jason Todd, bestiality

It's time for Damian to introduce his new acquired pet to the pack, Titus and Ace.

Tim gags and spanks Damian

Red Robin has to take Robin out on patrol because Batman is away, Damian is reckless and keeps disobeying orders so Tim punishes him while having him gagged for being mouthy. can progress to something more sexual but doesn't have to be. Damian secretly enjoying it is a bonus.

Deathstroke/All the Robins

Slade really has a thing for fighting and chasing after Batbrats…

Rose/Jason mommy kink edging and pegging

Jason wants to be a good boy for mommy, Rose rewards his good behavior

Jason Todd/Kyle Rayner hatesex - Filled

I’d love some rough, angry, violent hatesex between these two. Bonus points for snarky asshole bottom!jason and kyle using his ring to make restraints/other kinky constructs ;)

Flashpoint!Father Todd/Incubus!Dick

Incubus!Dick seduces Father Todd. Jason holds out longer than most but Dick prides himself on being irresistible. He’s never failed before and he doesn’t plan to start now. But maybe, instead of his usual dine-and-ditch MO, Dick think’s he might like to savor this meal for long. Jason falls so beautifully. (bottom Jason please) Catholic aesthetics, blasphemy as kink, church sex (altar, confessional, pews, etc)

Flashpoint Thomas Wayne/Father Todd

Thomas Wayne as Batman bends Father Todd over the altar. In uniform. (At least for Thomas. It would be super hot if he strips Father Todd out of his robes first. Maybe everything except his rosary?)

Jason/Tim rape

Tim ties down Jason and rides(rapes) him. Pls let Tim use Jason as nothing but a mere meat dildo.

Titans/Dick, Titans/Jason, Titans/Tim consensual gangbang - Filled

The not-so-secret tradition of team bonding by fucking the current Bat on the Teen Titans is well-adhered to, especially given the enthusiastic consent of all participants Feel free to include any or all: garden sex, pool sex, power use, DP, riding, pegging, toy use, CBT, nipple play, cockwarming, CFNM/CMNM, and consensual somno All other kinks welcome excluding scat, watersports, emeto, ageplay, vore, and anything else bloody

Thomas Elliot/Bruce Wayne (Rape/Non-con)

Bruce doesn't realise how obsessed Thomas really is with him. Leads to Hush raping Bruce. Can be when Bruce knows who Hush is or when he still doesn't know.

Evil!Dick and Jason, noncon or dubcon

Jason comes back to his safehouse and is surprised to find Dick already there. After the initial surprise, Jason is quick to find out that there's something... off, about this Dick. He's not acting like his usual self. It turns out this isn't the usual Dick that Jason is familiar with, instead, he is a darker version of him (drugged? Talon from Earth-3 that somehow ends up in the main universe? other possibilities? all welcome options!), and this Dark!Dick is obsessed with Jason and wants to fuck him... and he doesn't take no for an answer. So there's a setup for a non-con or dub-con(in case Jason also has a crush on main Dick) for you. Restraints (gags, ropes, tapes etc.) are also welcome but doesn't have to be present.

Kon-El/Lex Luthor Daddy Kink DubCon

Lex genetically programmed Kon to need his daddy to fill him up when he created him. Lex made Kon to check all his boxes (ie Superman, something he made, a gifted teenager). Kon can’t actually consent because of programming, and he doesn’t want it until he’s getting it. Can be simple daddy kink or full of abdl. Bonus points for trans!Kon

Guy Gardner/Bunch of Aliens possible Dubcon/Noncon

Macho, hotheaded, shit-talking Guy is the embodiment of hyper-masculinity, and that arrogance of his gets him into a lot more than just a bar fight. All of Guy's enemies seem to be of the huge, muscular variety, so let's see the most stocky lantern get put in his place. Does he secretly love it? Does he outright hate it? Maybe all that shit-talking was just a ploy to finally get someone to "punish" him right. The choice is up to you. Maybe it's a bunch of random aliens Guy's ticked off in a bar. Maybe all that showboating's pissed off Kilowog or Arkillo. Maybe Lobo's still put out after being tricked one too many times by Guy. Perhaps, Atrocitus's still kinda harboring a grudge for Guy kicking him out of the Red Lanterns. Then there's always the way too touchy Dementor with his Vuldarian kin. I'm all for any other kinks or situations, I just would prefer no bathroom stuff. Go absolutely wild.

Black Mask/anyone, bathroom control, omorashi - Filled on meme

I'm a simple person with simple needs: Roman controlling whether or not someone's allowed to piss. can be consensual or noncon torture, the victim can end up pissing themselves or make it to the bathroom safely. just as long as Roman's in total control of the situation, and smug about it. bonus points: tears, begging, banter, degradation, embarrassment, additional torture, anything else along those lines. watersports only, please, no scat!

Roy Clones/Dick gangbang omegaverse

YJ season 3 episode 4 has excellent gangbang material just so you know Add omegaverse to it and its perfect Noncon/dubcon is accepted also

Titans/Jason Gangbang

Prefer comics based more than the show but either is fine. Dick and his friends welcome the new Robin the Titans way, by breaking in that hole. New kid is always the team toy, and it's even more fun now that it's Nightwing's bratty kid brother. Consensual or non con, dealer's choice. Double (or triple) penetration, dirty talk, and powers used for sex are favorite kinks but I'm good with pretty much anything.

Willis Todd/Jason Todd, Mob/Jason; Incest and forced underage prostitution

Willis pimps out his kid for cash and drugs. Catherine either pretends she doesn't know or knows and helps/doesn't care. And like any good salesman, he makes sure to test out his product to make sure it's up to snuff. 

Make it cruel and awful and hopeless. Dehumanizing and degrading. Jason is just a hole to sell and use. belting in sensitive areas, beatings, violent sex, cum play, blood play... I just want something dark and nasty. 

____________________________________________________

Woo! Ok. I’ll try to keep this up the best I can. I’ll link/mark when prompts are filled so that you guys can check it out if you want (all filled prompts can be reached by the link in the title, but some have ao3 links that I put on the “Filled” note). 

I’ll also reblog this with any new prompts that come up or if I find I’ve forgotten one. 

[chaoticspacefam]

2020 In Review: Wordcount Tag

I was tagged for this by @actualanxiousswampwitch​ , thank you! I’m not sure who’s already done or been tagged for this cause I am, once again, late to the party LOL but I shall (no pressure and sorry if you’ve already done it!) tag: @rainofaugustsith​ , @darth-bagel​ , @thatmmolesbian​ , @thelastenvoyyy​ and anybody else who wants to do this. Yes, I promise I mean you!

Words: 45,314

Published: 0 (I’m not counting the couple of Six Sentence tags I’ve gotten, they’re snippets of an unfinished piece & are included below instead :), or roleplay replies, cause that feels like cheating lol.) I actually wrote a lot more than I thought I had, this is a rough guesstimate as well, as my oneshot WIPs tend to be all over the place across something like 6 different documents, some of which have existed since 2018, so I had to guess at how far up to count from the end for some of them, but I think it’s a fair guesstimate XD I also have included lore/worldbuilding docs in this because that was a 3-month long Lockdown 1.0 Boredom/”Canon is a trash fire so I’m ignoring that and making up my own lore” passion project and I’m goddamn proud of how much I wrote for that. It’s the most I’ve written in one stretch (think I finished it over a span of 3 nights or so, once I’d done all the research and made all the notes ofc ^^)

Not Published: 45,314

The Breakdown:

swtor - 45,314

for creeping shadows (my main longfic/part one of the subterfugeverse series) - 1,553  - Aria, stop being difficult! *shakes fists* XD

oneshots - 16,223

lore/worldbuilding (for subterfugeverse naturally) - 23,001 (is this ALL tomato alien lore? pretty much, yes, yes it is :’D ~400 words is “the WIP reworked timeline to correlate my worldbuilding with the canon timeline that was released”, but 98% is just...me thinking way too much about Purebloods and how they deserved way better goddamn lore. I blame @fluffynexu ‘s amazing tomato worldbuilding posts,  reading them when I went looking for “canon” lore one day for the rp is what got me started down that rabbithole (it’s awesome and if you haven’t already you should totally go check hers out too :DD), I had a “fuck you then canon I’ll do it myself too >:L” moment and once I started I couldn’t stop until I’d crapped out literally over 20k words on the subject *whispering* thank you LOL)

zephyrverse au bonus oneshots - 4,537 (stuff I wrote to fill in time gaps or “just cause I had a plot bunny”, relating to mine and k-christine’s zephyrverse au rp. None of these will likely be posted publicly, but they still deserve to be counted as words I wrote this year :’D

As you can see, most of my “muse” this year came from sporadic oneshots :’D The Ahaszaai twins also properly plot-bunnied their way into my brain in late 2019 and haven’t stopped making a nuisance of themselves the whole fucking year. Every time I tried to carry on with a chapter, one of the two of them would pop up like “Nooo write about ME! pay attention to ME!” - Yes, Ni’kasi, I will get to you this year, I promise XD

New Things I Tried:

Just Writing. Not worrying about whether “it wasn’t part of the next chapter” or “it comes from a part in the story that I’m nowhere near close to posting yet”. If I felt like writing something, or for a specific pairing/feeling/scene, whatever. I wrote until I ran outta muse juice. Yeah, it meant I didn’t technically “finish” anything this year BUT - the important thing is I wrote stuff. and that’s all that really matters, eh? :’D

Polyam ships! May not seem like a big deal but I spent a long time talking myself out of them because of internalised toxic monogamy and finally saying “you know what, fuck it! I can ship three or more people together and it can still be a perfectly wholesome, healthy and loving relationship and that’s okay” was a BIG thing for me this year.

Dialogue Scripts: which I didn’t count as wordcount because really it’s just word vomit of general tone/inflection and dialogue that I came up with right before falling asleep which I didn’t want to lose. Basically, if an exchange or a particularly punchy or moving line of dialogue popped into my brain but I wasn’t ready to write the whole scene that it fit into out, but didn’t want to forget the line(s). I wrote it out in movie script/script-style roleplay fashion e.g. Character’s Name: (emotion, hand gestures etc.) [Dialogue here] and so on. I know this is probably a well known trick of the trade, but I never took it seriously until this year. Seriously, do it. It’s great.

Favorite Thing I Wrote:

Hmmm, a snippet for Andronikos/Ni’kasi that I started this week which isn’t posted yet (saving it for this week’s Six Sentence Sunday so look out for it! :D) was pretty fun to work on, I love their dynamic and Kas is suprisingly fun to write for.

Also the Aria/Vano proposal scene that I posted a snippet for the week before last. I’m having great fun with that scene, and I really enjoy putting a non-serious spin on the classic “proposal scene” tropes. Can’t wait to finish it, though it may be a while before the full one goes up on AO3, as it depends whether it ends up fitting in as part of the mainfic or as an additional oneshot

And I have a D’leah/Kissai oneshot that I need to give another once-over before I finally yeet it onto AO3 and Tumblr for you guys to see :’D

Favorite Fic I Read:

@sleepswithvillains Eleanora/Quinn fic, Helplessly Hoping. I’m horribly behind on chapters and I gotta catch up and read the finale this week, but it’s been a helluva great ride and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed the story! <3

Also The Invitation collab with @tishinada featuring Zas and Fiona had me squealing, I can’t wait to catch up on HH and see more of these two, they’re adorable ;-; @a-muirehen​ ‘s Relu/Merkara series of course! I’m a complete sucker for (friends to lovers to in Ariano’s case but yea pfpfpf) enemies to lovers ships and these two are just so good, I am on the edge of my seat every time we get a new snippet for them, ngl (grimace emoji) @darth-bagel ‘s Sylvas/Graz’zt and Sylvas/Liz/Rilfaen snippets which they’ve been spoiling me with on Discord @mercurypilgrim ‘s Ven’fir/Quinn AU oneshots, Cloudbank (Western was a particular favourite, but all are very good!) and of course @rainofaugustsith ‘s Lana/Viri updates are always fantastic, some personal favourites from this year were Almost There & Memory of Healing :3 (I totally still go back to read Commander & Advisor too sometimes, getting to see Viri be a little diabolical and messing with “MiNiSTeR LoRMaN!” was and still is my favourite thing XD)

If I’ve left you out I’m sorry!! These were the ones that stuck out in my memory, but I’ve loved everyone’s writing this year, it’s been great :3

Writing Goals:

to actually finish and post chapter 8 & 9 of Creeping Shadows. Then we’ll get to the meat and potatoes of the story and maybe Aria will stop being a brat and fighting me every time I try to stick to a semi-regular update schedule Get off my butt, finalise the name and get started on Ni’kasi’s part of the Subterfugeverse story. Maybe run the updates in-tandem with Creeping Shadows but idk if I want to wait till after CS is done before I start posting Kas’s side, or do them side-by-side yet, we’ll see ;) Keep writing! I know better than to pressure myself by setting a specific word count goal, that’s never worked well in the past

At least 2 chapters of each of the works mentioned above would be great though, more would be better! We’ll see how I go

Words of Thanks:

honestly, to everybody in the fandom I’ve met this year. Anybody that I follow, thank you for being there and engaging with me and/or posting amazing content for me to look at! I came over from deviantART where the SWTOR fandom is incredibly small and generally quite inactive and the contrast since moving over here has been incredibly uplifting. I very nearly cancelled Creeping Shadows and stopped posting fic for my SWTORverse altogether because I got next to no engagement on dA and it was very disheartening to the point where I felt I could enjoy the game and the rp partners I had, but the solo projects I’d put so much thought, time and love into already weren’t worth continuing. You guys took that spark and kept it going and I really don’t have enough words to say how grateful I am for that. Even if I haven’t published much this year, making posts on this tumblr, interacting with everyone and working on lore, plot points and so on for Subterfugeverse has kept me going through the Hellish Year of Nightmares that was 2020 <3

to the amazing new friends I’ve made in this past year, who have listened to me ramble about headcanons, character backstories, writing snippets (and rambled/sent some back), keep being awesome: @walk-ng-d-saster , @darth-bagel , @kyber-heart , @deepseacritter , @thedinalixlegacy to further friends and meme tag buddies, I get so excited every time I see a mention for a new meme or ask game in my inbox, so thank you!! : @mimabeann , @palepinkycat , @a-master-procrastinator , @raven-of-domain-kwaad , @actualanxiousswampwitch , @thatmmolesbian , @a-muirehen to my regular commentors/rebloggers/likers/askbox lurkers, I see every one of you and every time your users pop up I grin like a kid in a toy shop: @starlightjedi , @sparkles-and-rust , @wilvarin-chan , @sunsetofdoom , @ask-an-andalite , @thelastenvoyyy . @lyrishadow and more because Tumblr only goes so far back and I have the memory of Swiss Cheese. If you regularly comment, like, reblog, or anything, from me, know that I see you, and I love and appreciate you for it! <3

I couldn’t possibly remember to tag everyone and I promise if I missed you out it’s not because I hate you! Anxiety just sometimes be a bitch and I don’t wanna look like a clown calling someone a “friend” if I’m not explicitly sure we are, in fact, friends. I think you’re all awesome and I’m so glad to have moved over here and met you all <3

[seatosomert]

Street Photography...my New therapy.

Now you guys who've been here a while will already know about my love for Street Photography.

Just of late I've been dealing with some significant work stress.

I'm meditating and getting outdoors. I usually exercise regularly in the gym but I've not been for a week now.

I've needed something else to immerse myself into and take my mind away from the stresses at work.

I've chosen to throw myself into more Street photography.

I've been reading what I can only describe as one of the best self help books I've read. I'm sure the author Sean Tucker intended this book for other means, yet I say self help because it is self help for creatives.

In writing this book Sean has helped me to do some real soul searching and I've made some discoveries along the way.

I've leapt out of a creative rut, discovered my photographic Raison D' Etre and I've started to connect with my photography in an entirely new way. And it feels great.

I've let go of my, probably unhealthy connection with Social Media for a more casual relationship. I've started to invest more time in helping others by getting back into coaching again.

In essence I've completely fallen back, head over heels, in love with my photography again. But this time without the baggage that has us doubting ourselves or comparing ourselves to others too often.

We all do it.

The book is a mix of philosophical narrative, which Tucker presents with a gentle, non-patronising delivery. He writes with an honesty and degree of vulnerability that allows the reader to truly connect with his story. One which some of us share in many aspects.

However, where this book differs from all others about improving your photography let's say, is that it's applicable to all creatives.

Indeed it doesn't focus on photography, but instead talks about just being creative and the struggles we can all face. Then he begins to unwrap some of this and gives you some suggestions on how to unpack your creative blocks let's say, re-organise your priorities (pretty much you as a person really) in a conversational manner rather than a list of what to do and what not to do.

It's also a bit of an auto biography for Tucker. And what an interesting and varied life he has led.

Anyway. I tell you this not to try and sell you his book (although I can HIGHLY recommend it), but instead to explain to you how I have refocused my creative attention and some of the tools I've used to do this. It's got me into a much better place creatively. This book was the significant catalyst.

Zone Focusing...the street photogs secret weapon.

I've gone back to shooting on the Sony a6300 for now when shooting street scenes. The articulating screen is great for this genre and as I have been using some 7Artisans manual focus lenses (25mm f/1.8 and 55mm f/1.4) I've been using the superior Peak focusing in the Sony a6300.

However. Today I was using zone focusing. This is where you set your aperture and focus point so that you have. A zone within which any subject entering that zone will be in acceptable focus.

The advantage of this method is that you set your focus and aperture then you shoot. You can also preset your shutter speed and just switch ISO to auto and then just focus on what's going on around you and composition. It's the fastest possible way you can shoot. Yes, it's even faster than the fastest AF, because you see, you shoot, you move on. That's it.

It's a truly liberating way to shoot and before anyone even notices you you're done and gone.

It's great and I highly recommend it.

If anyone wants me to go into this more and talk through how this is done, comment on the post and I'll sort something for you guys.

So here are some more shots, all of which have been shot with the focus zone method.

I have to say, I went to meet a pal for lunch today and so went to the city an hour early and shot for an hour before our meet.

It was easy to fit in and it was so therapeutic just pointing my fully manual semi pro (some might say) Camera as a point and shoot, but a point and shoot that I had complete control over the metering etc and firing away. I didn't do any chimping. Just shot and moved on.

I managed to hit focus about 98% of the time I have found when I examined the images at home. It was great.

And the important bit...I was feeling complete overwhelm with stress a couple of days ago. I couldn't be arsed doing anything.

I knew that was totally not me.

Getting out to shoot in this way, no stress shooting basically, allowed me to just completely immerse myself and be present in my environment and just to shoot for the sheer pleasure of it.

So my gratitude goes out to Sean Tucker for writing what is a truly amazing piece of work and to photography for saving me from complete burn out.

So this last image was taken yesterday by my amazing wife who managed to catch a rare image of me with a genuine smile.

(Love you babes 😁x)

So that's it guys. Comment, like, share follow and hit me up for any observations, any questions and feel free to share your stories in the comments if you've had a similar experience to the one I describe here.

See all in a bit.

Kind regards.

Neil.