#i wish i was as chill as Travis sometimes | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

baxndaid · 3 months

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sal fisher x reader 🖇️🎼💍 -- popular!reader headcannons!! + scenario

a/n ; i need him so bad sorry.........idgaf..............pls request more sal

(🎵) - he judged you a little bit a first like he didn’t mean it but it just came naturally since you surrounded yourself with all the bullies, jocks, and standard mean girls

- you were lowkey a mean girl too like you had your little group and you should snicker and laugh whenever sal and his friends walked past

- and while you DID feel a TAD bit bad, you and your friends would make fun of his prosthetic head sometimes </3 it was just for a laugh

- but yes, he didn’t like you very much - with people like travis, he could somewhat understand since travis had home issues and… had no friends 🤓 you? you had everything by the looks of it

- you were popular, pretty, and everyone seemed to gravitate towards you

- overall, you were the cliche mean girl who bullied the quirky main characters (who sal and his friends, ever so graciously, gave themselves the title of)

- speaking of cliche, you two started talking when you both were forced to sit next to each other in math class, and you hated math

- he would help you though, which surprisingly you appreciated, in turn, you would help him with his art class portfolio which he also appreciated

- this didn’t mean you were entirely nice to him either, far from it, but when it was just you two it was a lot more chill and you could visibly see him relax around you when your friends weren’t there

- sal desperately wanted to be able to talk to you confidently without you or your friends shoving him into a locker, he wished you could talk to him as nicely as you did in math class

- because you worked so well in class together, you were often paired together in projects

- sally would be the most excited since that meant more alone time with you, while you were teased by your friends (they told you that you should pack pepper spray before you stepped into his room just in case, how loving!)

- as much as he didn’t want to admit it, he was attracted to you, i mean, who wouldn’t be

- he would often space out while his friends spoke amongst themselves, a distant look on his… eye? larry caught on and thought that his best friends strange behaviour came from a girl he liked~ awww

- yeah little did he know 💔 it’s the worst person you know

- larry wouldn’t take it likely knowing that sal has formed a small crush on the person who terrorises him and his friends on the daily

- “dude! you know how bad she can get!”, ashley agrees, sal waves his hand at them dismissively

“it’s fine guys!”

- larry glares at the back of his head as sal walks away, knowing that he has a class with you next

- his friend group thinks your a demon and you’ve possessed him into liking you despite your behaviour

- back to you two, as time passes you get friendlier with sally, the bullying turning into teasing, even with your friends around

- you didn’t miss how sally looked at you when he thought you weren’t looking, he would stutter and look around frantically if you caught him, you thought it was cute

- he wouldn’t show you his face, since you’ve made fun of his prosthetic before and he didn’t want to ruin whatever weird relationship you had built by showing you his disfigured face

- sally is one of the most patient (and slightly pathetic) guys you’ve ever met, so naturally, you form a small crush on him too, but you’d never admit it

- when he walks by you in the corridor, you’d yank his backpack towards you harshly, making his back jolt into your chest

- you’d then wrap your arms around his shoulders, essentially trapping him with his back towards you, and ask him about his day

- sally was a little apprehensive as first, being unable to tell whether you were about to bully him or casually do something sweet and brush it off straight after

- though he soon found that 9 times out of 10, you would be doing something affectionate ❤️

- his friends didn’t like this, obviously, but in due time they’d get used to you, they just wanted to know if sally was being messed with or if you were genuine

- sally would probably have to be the person to confess becuase lord knows your way too stubborn to admit that you actually like the blue haired guy you’ve been bullying just a while prior

- he would be sweating his ass off while shifting in his chair while he found a good time to confess, while you cluelessly played with his cat

- his dad wasn’t home, and he made larry wear a wig and makeup so he could practice his speech (in which todd and ashley recorded without the two knowing)

- but his memory failed him and his mind went blank, so he decided to wing it

- he tapped your thigh, distracting you from gizmo, and you turned to look at him curiously. he looked like he was falling apart as your gaze practically pierced into him

- he gulped silently and turned to you fully, his eye(s) looking down, and told you his feelings (the best he could at least)

- you stare at him for a minute, silent, to be honest he was getting a little upset at the lack of response. he wished you’d say something, anything instead of looking at him like he just killed somebody (💀)

- to his surprise, you leaned in slightly, but stopped and touched the chin of his prosthetic

“can i?”

- he gulped, and nodded his head as he reached for the straps behind his head to take his prosthetic off with ease. he only undid the first one, and only lifted the mask enough for you to reach his lips

- his mouth had a small cleft up to his nose (or whatever was left of it), on the left side of his mouth, his teeth were exposed, scars and missing flesh adorned his face

- despite this, you leaned in fully and managed to close the gap between you, sally’s hand reaching for yours as you kissed, you held each other

#x reader #reader insert #sally face x reader #sal fisher #sal x reader #sal fisher x reader #sally face #larry johnson #travis phelps #sally face fanart #ashley campbell #todd morrison #sally fisher #xreader

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sincelastsession · 4 months

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I've missed telling you things. But I'm stoned and I honestly don't want to remember.

How are lobotomies these days? Can they sever instead of do a nerve block to my lizard brain that keeps screaming DANGER DANGER DANGER? Is this an option? Do I need that part of my brain?

Travis is getting his drummer friend to find me noise canceling 🎧

They asked how quiet I needed it to be.

I told Travis "I don't want to hear a bomb go off" "Deafen me bröther"

So maybe that will help.

My mom wants to go to lunch tomorrow and look at garden homes. 🙃 I am scared I'll lose my shit because she presses my buttons like only a mother can. Just huge trigger if she's not calm and patient with me. She just had a huge fight with me about how she didn't want Mexican food because the Guatemalan ppl can't cook...and was acting like a racist petulant child.

I convinced her to go to spoke and hub. Then she will have a new restaurant to hate on I guess.

I wish the chill part of me would take over tomorrow but I feel like it's gonna be the take no shit manager and firefighters. I don't want that to happen but it's like so second nature to react to crap.

Yeah a nerve block sounds FANTASTIC

Honestly I'm constantly taking a leftover Adderall for a future session so you can see the difference and God maybe we can write a letter to the medical board and maybe my psychiatrist can just continue to write it. I only take 5mg max a day split up into 2.5mg doses...so I really don't see how taking that during the day with my xanax daily meds that oddly don't conflict and then just smoke my weed before bed.

But the problem is its 3 substances that are usually never prescribed together. They just happen to be the best combo for me and I'm a different person on it. I can hold a conversation.

Maybe the medical board would approve it if I could state my case and show them the difference?

Idk I just miss when I was a more functional person.

I have agoraphobia so bad some days I literally cry by my door because I can't leave.

But other days I want to go wandering around by myself in the woods.

I feel like a guy sometimes like that's weird because I do identify as female but yeah get moments of feeling like a man...I feel like I could maybe draw what the parts of me look like in minds eye.

Sometimes I feel like a small Asian woman like on kdramas and that's also odd.

Sometimes my little side pops out when I see cute things.

Sometimes a gruff dad.

Sometimes me at 16

And I'm sure there's more.

But idk if I'm me or if I'm somewhere else hidden

I say little me I don't mean inner child

My inner child doesn't feel there.

Honestly Joshua if I could afford it I'd see an emdr therapist in Lafayette and I'd make the weekly drive. I'd also see if hypnosis therapist would work. I would build an army to help me.

You aren't doing a bad job. I however haven't seen anything in my email you said you'd send and I'm not happy abt it but I'm sure since you are human you got busy

I do wish they had a manual for neurodivergent ppl and autistic ppl that translated what neurotypical ppl mean and tips and tricks on how to communicate with them.

They always think I'm fighting with em.

I hate one people call me negative. I mean I'm sorry I've been dealing with trauma since I was 2 years old so it's very hard for me to see the positives and it's not for lack of trying.

If I'd given up on getting better I'd have quit therapy years ago.

I feel like I could easily get a social work degree but it's not something I want to do as a profession. I mean do some LCSW just take like easier cases with big idiots that just need to be told to go ground and touch grass? (Joke) but no I mean I assume there's some easier clients is all.

I really don't find Myself to be a negative person I Find Myself to be a realist and I also Find Myself to be sort of a cynic and an absurdist. I do like philosophy but I do not like it enough to study it as much as other people get into it I do go down rabbit holes

I mean not only is my interest that is special and medical but I do like lots of other things it's just been had to be primarily focused in medical so I didn't get missed diagnosed and almost fucking die again because nobody likes that

It's aggravating to be your own advocate in the medical world Like it's really a big pain in the ass to fight doctors and nurses and people that do not know what they are talking about and I do not ever mean to sound egotistical but a lot of people mistake me talking like this for that

Like currently my rheumatologist is seeing a friend of mine that has a disorder that is very similar to what I had growing up and the woman is having a reaction to the method track state and I keep telling her to call our rheumatologist and go to the ER but the woman says that our rheumatologist said that's normal and I know damn well it's not normal and she's gonna end up in the ER somewhere or another and it makes me feel like an old retired charge nurse even though I'm not even old enough to be one of those sassy old charge nurses.

The funny thing is my mother is a charge nurse but she doesn't exactly act like one because she also has to make drama and play the victim.

I mean I really can't believe that she's trying to get my sister hooked up with medical marijuana right now

My sister already relies on street Marijuana that could possibly be laced and smokes it constantly all day every day

I mean honestly I sound like a giant hypocrite because I'm stoned right now but I don't smoke as much as her I used to smoke as much as her if not more and I got to a point where I could not get stoned anymore and I decided to quit until I had pain issues again and so now I'm having to legally medicate and that's pretty weird feeling when a couple of years ago you could have gotten arrested and it's weird having to convert the Scared emotions about taking my medicine into positive emotions about taking my medicine because I still get nervous when I'm about to smoke like I'm about to get caught.

I suppose you can say it similar to the feeling of walking out of a store and feeling like they're gonna stop you for shop lifting even though you didn't do anything

I have very intrusive thoughts like that all the time and I assume it's part of my o CD but it's really annoying and usually when I take my Adderall it goes away completely but I can't take it and it's pointless to take it because I only have a few left in the fucking bottle and the medical board won't allow me to have that prescribed and it's stupid bullshit and politics and the health care system for mental health is completely fucked and I've known this since I was a child And I don't even know if there's a way to fix it anymore honestly because they have screwed it so bad

I really wish that I could have made my goal make my brain better and then make me an independent and knowledgeable enough to live on my own without the help of others without my parents finances and So that I might travel or move elsewhere because I get so stir crazy but I've been stuck inside and helicopter and micro managed and harassed and terrorized and fucking abused for so long that it's scary to go places because I feel like I'm going to get in trouble for everything I do

I feel like I'm going to get in trouble if I breathe too loud

I mean I'm sure I could give you more examples because like sometimes I really do think that something takes me over and talks for me because I don't understand how else I would even function enough to communicate with other people with the insane amount of shit that has happened to me. I mean I still have things in my memory bank that are foggy and behind. closed doors. It sucks that I keep remembering things because it's the time where my brain feels safest to finally be able to understand what happened to me and stuff because I know it protected me a lot as a child and it's really weird that I just have all negative memories and only little glimmers of good things I really don't remember a lot of the good things my parents said that they did for me I don't remember a lot of experiences I've been told that I've had that were good. And you know that a lot of people have blamed on medications that I take but I have never had any memory issues due to this particular medication that I'm on that I have been on for a long time it has not really changed anything in that regard. The other ones however did fuck with my head like that.

There is something terribly wrong with my father mentally and I really would love to get him help but I don't know how to do that without it affecting my life in a major way and I don't know if I could handle another major life change without absolutely losing my shit

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jaysmith2232 · 9 months

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Man here I am in Baltimore, to see my boy demarvin take out the ravens. I got chill with him, when I got in today and it made me see everything like when we were growing up. I realized i had become blind and changed from who I used to be.being here in Baltimore with my boy, and then gettin to chill with my other boy Ty and watch him and the 76ers, and then us gettin go out like old times just with more money, man I realized I missed my boys but I’m happy both of them are in the same state doin their thing. Gettin away from all this bullshit, really cleared my head and for once in a long time I’m thinking and seeing clearly. Instead of tryin to please people and shit I’m just goin with the flow and whatever happens, happens. If it’s meant to be, then it’s meant to be but I’m gonna change my shit for the people that want to be in it, and not the people tryin to fit in it. I dont know if I needed today to happen to wake me up, but it did. I know I’m gonna get hell for sayin it like I planned shit to happen…because I didn’t but sometimes shit you don’t plan on happening is usually the shit that needs to happen. Like I said I dont know if today was a test or if it was just a wake up call, but I know today happened. I apologize to anyone that I hurt or offended and you know who you are..,like honestly my bad. It took me gettin away and seeing the people who excepted me from day 1, to wake me the fuck up. Man I should have listen to my boys all along, well let’s get this weekend with 2 dubs and then me and my boys are gonna kill the night like old times…the only one we’re missing is our boy g-dub and I wish him and his jets good luck Sunday hope they go out on top, we’ll be watching bruh so you better go off like you used to for lake Travis. Man really all I can wish for is my bous to have beast games…I know Ty lost tonight but boy fucked around and had a near 30 piece double double, talk about my boy doin work. Man I miss playin with you in travel ball dawg so me and D are gonna be alil late Saturday,but we’ll make it like old times gassin your ass up. I remember when you were playin at south garland, and dude from the other team was like “ I got Maxey, I want Maxey” and the ref didn’t miss a beat n was like “ na, you don’t want him” we spent that weekend laughing our asses off, and that was was the running joke when someone wanted to guard you. Man I miss the old days, but shit it will be like old times Saturday night homie.

#old times #new memories

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vreugd-madelon · 1 year

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Legends and Lattes Review

Legends and Lattes by Travis Baldree is a 308 page LGBT+ fantasy novel.

Worn out after decades of packing steel and raising hell, Viv the orc barbarian cashes out of the warrior’s life with one final score. A forgotten legend, a fabled artifact, and an unreasonable amount of hope lead her to the streets of Thune, where she plans to open the first coffee shop the city has ever seen. However, her dreams of a fresh start pulling shots instead of swinging swords are hardly a sure bet. Old frenemies and Thune’s shady underbelly may just upset her plans. To finally build something that will last, Viv will need some new partners and a different kind of resolve.

I rate this book 5/5 stars.

I really enjoyed reading this book, and love how the title of the book returned into the story. Another this I love is how chill and cozy the story is, while the pacing is sometimes broken with fast paced action sequences. I love how the friendship slowly evolves into into a romantic one. I like how the menu at the café expands throughout the story.

One thing I dislike, it a personal pet peeve of mine, and that is the fact that every chapter is starting on the right side of the pages. This causes the left sides to be blank, which is a waste of paper. This book could've been 11 pages shorter, which is close to a chapter.

Do you have any questions? Or maybe some recommendations? Send me an ask here on Tumblr or tweet me. If you wish to support me, you can buy me a coffee! Or even buy my debut fantasy novel, The Mending Road.

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zigtheeortega · 4 years

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ride or die playlist

by @pixeljazzy and @zigtheeortega

so after pj made this post, and was encouraged by @choicesarehard to make a playlist for rodaw, i reached out to her and we decided to collab! this is a comprehensive playlist, with explanations for each song. some being the lyrics fit really well, but others are because the vibe fits the characters (in our opinion), not necessarily the song meaning.

putting the song explanations under the cut, since it’ll be long! songs picked by pj have [p] next to it and mine have [j] next to it! hope you enjoy it!

Logan

What You Know Bout Love, Pop Smoke [p]

I had to apply the pressure, ‘cause you my hidden treasure / I think I’m falling in love

Are we surprised this song is first? C’mon now. Anyway, literally when I heard it for the first time, I was like this is the love song that I could see someone just vibing to in a car with their partner, at a house party in the corner serenading their boo, etc. and then BOOM a vision of Hieron and Logan in a car appeared because I could totally see this as their vibe. Just the thought of Logan rapping this line to Hieron clears my skin.

[p.s. pj wrote a fic based on this song and it’s perfect you should read it]

The Way, Trippie Redd ft. Russ [p]

We’re lost but, babe, we found the way

Because Logan and MC are two teens are a mess lowkey and don’t know what they want from life quite yet but they know they got it together.

Think About Me, dvsn [p]

This song is just radiating Logan and MC parting ways vibes

FIND MY WAY, DaBaby [p]

I feel like as Logan is driving away from MC to god knows where, this is something he’d definitely drive to

Seasons, 6lack ft. Khalid [p]

You’re lucky the greatest thing I can do is marry you / ‘cause if I could, I’d spill my blood

I absolutely adore this slow, chill song, and feel like this is something MC and Logan would be listening to as they unwind in their loft, and with the favorite line, I think it encapsulates how much Logan truly loves and would do anything for MC

Idfc, blackbear [p]

This is giving me Logan vibes after the reveal where MC leaves the shop and he’s just reeling in his emotions and feelings and is just purely in his bag thinking about everything

Hide, Juice WRLD ft. Seezyn [p]

Really think I found my home, shorty made me feel at home

Think I met my soulmate, yeah, I know it

Dusk Till Dawn, ZAYN ft. Sia [p]

But you’ll never be alone / I’ll be with you from dusk till dawn / I’ll be with you from dusk till dawn / Baby, I’m right here

This song hurts me so so much but it’s giving me MC sleeping on Logan’s chest type of vibes while he’s up because he can’t sleep and he’ . Also reminds me of Logan because we all know that infamous line “I was just a rock in space lucky enough to burn up in your atmosphere for a moment,” and I feel like this was an unspoken if you look to the stars you’ll know I’m always with you type beat.

Fool In Love, Rihanna [p]

Mama, I found a man / who loves me and understands / papa, he’s quite a man / he adores me, he’s my biggest fan

Okay so y’all remember how MC was having a mini identity crisis and didn’t know which version of herself she was? And Logan was listening and understanding and processing everything she was ranting about but in the end was just like no matter which one you decide, I like all of you? Yeah, that. Along with him just supporting her whenever he can, even though sometimes it can be overbearing, and him just loving watching her change and grow before his eyes (even though we not gonna mention the part of him that doesn’t love that change, feeling guilty for the person she’s becoming and how it could change her life, and the initial intentions he had although how he feels now is genuine) is literally what I think about with these lines

And don’t get me wrong, I know he’s not perfect in your eyes / but somehow he’s flawless in mine

Papa, did I let you down? / Are you ashamed of how your little girl turned out?

This is the lyric that really gets me because one of the things I loved about Ride or Die was the complicated relationship MC had with her father as it was something that resonated so strongly with me. So this one right here really just encapsulates an aspect of that because when MC’s on her this is who I am now and I know you resent that because he genuinely is so hurt and in shock of how his girl changed before his eyes, beyond the reigns of control that he once had, and he can’t do anything else but process and accept that his little girl isn’t so little anymore, rolling around with the people he tried so hard to keep her away from.

Roll Dice, Roddy Rich [j]

I seen the Reap’ come / Live my life I had to roll dice / Been through strife, my heart is cold as ice

I’m a star, I’m just hidden in the low light

Pretty explanatory, considering Logan’s been through a considerable amount of situations that put him in harm’s way and he’s come out stronger (and considerably more detached) each time.

Story Of Us, Tinashe [j]

Yeah, you’re the prince of my heart / And now there ain’t no way they can keep us apart, keep us apart

This song reminds me of Logan and MC a lot because it’s an optimistic take on their relationship as a whole and the sad ending.

You Know That I Love You, Donnell Jones [j]

You know that I love you / And that ain’t gon’ change / And though you’re not here with me now / My love for you stays the same

I think Logan would listen to R&B, specifically sappy 90’s R&B, and this line reminds me of them perfectly. I mean just listen to it, it’s perfect.

My Favorite Part, Mac Miller & Ariana Grande [j]

Said, you just don’t know how beautiful you are / And baby that’s my favorite part / You walk around so clueless to it all / Like nobody gonna break your heart

Said, the universe couldn’t keep us apart / Why would it even try?

Before things come together, they have to fall apart

Logan says from the get go that he thinks it’s wild that MC is modest and that he’s surprised she hadn’t gotten a lot of attention from guys. The other song lyrics I mentioned remind me a lot of their separation.

Colt

Me And My Girlfriend, Tupac Shakur [j]

Lost in the whirlwind, ninety-six, Bonnie and Clyde / Me and my girlfriend, do one-eighty-five when we ride

All I need in this life of sin, is me and my girlfriend / Down to ride to the bloody end, just me and my girlfriend

So it’s canon that Colt likes West Coast rap – and this song absolutely embodies Colt’s musical interests and his relationship with MC. He wouldn’t admit it out loud but he definitely heard this song and thought of MC.

Something Special, Pop Smoke [p]

I think you’re something special / I’ll take you on a shopping spree

We all know Colt is the king of LA and can definitely buy him and MC anything they want, also the “her father the police” verse quite literally hit the nail on the head

Martin & Gina, Polo G [p]

He was playing games / Got you dancing in the middle of the club

At first, saw this as a Logan and MC song to listen to in the car, but if you’re like me and was romancing Logan but danced in the club with Colt because Logan was being distant, the lyrics just do it for me

Hit ‘Em Up, Tupac Shakur [p]

You couldn’t tell us Colt wouldn’t love this song, we’re not accepting criticism at this time

Pulling Me Back, Chingy ft. Tyrese [j]

Every time I try to leave / Something keeps pulling me back, me back / Telling me I need you in my life / It was meant to be / You were meant for me / So that means we gotta make it work

This song reminds me a lot of Colt’s feelings towards MC, because in the lyrics they’re not mentioning they necessarily love her, they’re just gravitating towards her, realizing they need her. And that’s exactly how Colt works through his feelings.

Loveeeeeee Song, Rihanna ft. Future [j]

Boy lately, you been stingy with your time / Got me wondering, I’m wondering if I’m on your mind / Boy I just wanna be in your possession / You say I’m the one you want so come express it

Yeah, we all know Colt wasn’t straightforward with his feelings but is more prone to expressing himself physically, and I think this song feels like a confession of her own qualms with him but recognizing that she’s alright with him being physical over verbal. Honestly it’s probably not that deep but this song reminds me of Colt x MC so much.

Complicated, Rihanna [j]

Why is everything with you so complicated / Why do you make it hard to love you / Oh I hate it / ‘Cause if you really wanna be alone / I, will throw my hands up ‘Cause baby I tried

God this whole song is Colt and MC all over because he’s so wishy washy and doesn’t express himself properly.

90210, Travis Scott [j]

I think Colt and Logan would bump this and that’s my only reasoning.

Changed Up, Rae Sremmurd [j]

I think Logan and Colt both alike would bump this in their car and maybe relate to the lyrics and the general vibe of it.

Demons and Angels, A Boogie With a Hoodie ft. Juice WRLD [p]

I’m from the West Side, know not to play with us, yeah

I think I’m addicted to this lifestyle, I swear

Colt is quite literally from the West Side, and the ‘I think I’m addicted to this lifestyle’ line is what really stood out to me because Colt wanted nothing than to be a part of his father’s life and legacy, and Kaneko wanted to keep that separate from him because he knew Colt would be all in.

Run This Town, Jay-Z ft. Rihanna [p]

Does this need an explanation because you already know Colt is running the fuck outta LA thank you for tuning in

Mona

Ungodly Hour, Chloe x Halle [j]

You know that I’ve, I heard it all before / You’re hesitant, wish you could give me more

I don’t have the time / To teach you how to love all over again / Now let me ask you this / Are you giving all that you could give?

This is Mona and MC all over. She was clear about being hurt by an ex, and that it was hard for her to open up to MC in the first place, let alone fall for her. So this is like a confessional from MC to Mona.

Te Amo, Rihanna [j]

Then she said Te amo, then she put her hand around my waist / I told her no, she cried Te amo / I told her I’m not gonna run away, but let me go / My soul is awry and without asking why / I said Te amo

The lyrics are sad but this reminds me of Mona and MC, too. There’s a lot of push and pull with Mona, so I think this describes their back and forth so well.

Scared of Love, Juice WRLD [p]

Not scared to love, just scared of love

I initially put this in the Logan section, but I think it’s more fitting for Mona because she put up these walls to avoid putting herself at risk in the process of giving someone her all after the last girl played her, but underneath it all, she’s still capable to love even though she may think she’s undeserving of it from MC or that love in itself is a scam.

ball w/o you, 21 Savage [p] [and j bc our minds are linked]

I’d rather have loyalty than love / ‘Cause love don’t really mean jack / See love is just a feeling / You can love somebody and still stab them in they back

This is giving me Mona and her ex vibes, and just how Mona is a very everyone for themselves type of person so she has no problem balling by herself because that’s what she expects in the end.

Escape, Akon and Wizkid [p]

We can run away / so far away, escape

Oh, my baby, oh, baby / I would never let you go

Okay I know our songs for Mona have been sad lately, but this reminds me of them because Mona said MC would be hard asf to forget and I already know MC is scrambling to find a solution, a possibility, where Mona didn’t have to go to jail and they’d be able to be together, hence ‘escape’.

Escape, Kehlani [p]

Strange for me to wanna love someone / Who’s better by themselves

‘Cause I can’t let you lose yourself, looking for me / And I can’t let you make me your, your everything

I know you see this escape theme I’m on here LMFAOO but I think this is in Mona’s perspective about MC because she’s like MC is a goody two shoes, new to this life, etc. just overall someone with a better future than me and I don’t wanna mess that up for them (hence the I’m dangerous and pushing her away in the beginning and all the warnings).

Acquainted, The Weeknd [p]

Baby, you’re no good / Cause they warned me ‘bout your type girl, I’ve been ducking left and right

To say that we’re in love is dangerous / But girl I’m so glad we’re acquainted

Can’t Remember to Forget You, Shakira ft. Rihanna [p and j]

I can’t remember to forget you / I keep forgetting I should let you go

“You’re gonna be damn hard to forget.”

This is so Mona because it’s both flexible in meaning with her ex and MC.

Don’t Make It Harder On Me, Chloe x Halle [j]

If you keep acting so sweet / I might just wake up and leave / This boy that I pinky swore / We’d be together for sure / I can’t be thinking of you / When I’m alone with my boo / If you smile at me again / I may do something stupid

Gives me Logan/Colt/Mona love triangle type vibes!

Who Can I Run To, Xscape [j]

Who can I run to, to share this empty space? / Who can I run to, When I need love? / Who can I run to, to fill this empty space with laughter?

After her li’s leave this def gives me those bittersweet vibes like when they all leave L.A., including MC for college.

Aston Martin Music, Rick Ross [j]

Bobbin’ to the music / This is how we do it, all night / Breezin’ down the freeway / Just me and my baby

Would’ve came back for you / I just needed time to do what I had to do / Caught in the life / I can’t let it go / Whether that’s right I won’t ever know

This reminds me of another bittersweet moment like MC is reflecting on her favorite times with her LI, but also acknowledging that her LI can’t be 100% loyal to her because of her lifestyle

Love Without Tragedy / Mother Mary, Rihanna [j]

Brown eyes, tuxedo, fast cars / A James Dean on the low, Dean on the low

Who knew the course of this one drive / Injured us fatally

Let’s live in the moment / As long as we got each other / Die in the moment / I’m prepared to die in the moment / ‘Cause even forever ain’t forever

This entire song fits for all the LI’s (despite the lyrics saying “boy” it works for all of them perfectly. I just picked a couple lyrics to prove it!

Question Existing, Rihanna [j]

Who am I living for?/ Is this my limit?/ Can I endure some more?/ Chances I’m given, question existing

Reminds me of when MC was torn between loyalty to her father and Jason Shaw and MPC at the same time.

Bed of Lies, Nicki Minaj ft. Skylar Grey [p]

This is 100% MC after the reveal.

Change Your Life, Kehlani ft. Jhene Aiko [p and j]

I heard that you a gangsta / Not one to try to save her / Always focus on your paper / Don't got time to wager with your heart

You deserve someone that'll take you to another level

The lyrics to this song fit so well with all of the LI’s. Definitely addresses all of the LI’s reluctance to be with MC and MC’s pursuit of them.

Serial Lover, Kehlani [p and j]

Lord knows / My intentions are pure and my heart full of gold, oh

This song fits MC’s relationship with all of the LI’s, especially when there’s conflict between them. MC is miles more transparent with her feelings than Logan, Colt, and Mona.

She’s So Gone, Naomi Scott [p]

So it looks like the joke’s on you / ‘cause the girl that you thought you knew / She’s so gone

You can look but you won’t see the girl I used to be, ‘cause she / she’s so gone, away / like history

Yes this is from Lemonade Mouth and yes I feel like this embodies MC perfectly!

Misc.

(this includes Ximena, Toby, side characters, the overall vibe of ROD, etc.)

Tints, Anderson .Paak ft. Kendrick Lamar [j]

Ridin’, ridin’, round that open street / I need tints / I need my windows tinted / I can’t be flying down that 110 with a bad bitch in my whip / I need tints

This reminds me a lot of Ximena and Toby because they’re so chill and carefree compared to the rest of the crew, and this song embodies that.

Nascar, Roddy Ricch [p]

Honestly, heard this song and thought I’d be perfect for another side show, or a racing song

We Don’t Luv Em, HoodRich Pablo Juan [p]

Another side show/racing song

DJ Got Us Fallin’ In Love, Usher [p]

I feel like this could’ve played at the club depending on the vibe they were going for, and even if they weren’t, I feel like the club was a very romantically charged event so the DJ had errbody falling in love (MC and whoever, Toby and the guy he went off to dance with, etc.)

break da law, 21 Savage [p]

Me and my dawgs break laws

This is Kaneko and the crew, even though Kaneko would never call them his dawgs, but you get the gist.

Trust Nobody, Lil Wayne ft. Adam Levine [p]

I don’t trust nobody, not my lovers, not my friends / I don’t make no promises ‘cause I know just how they’ll end / I don’t trust nobody, I don’t need nobody else / And as messed up as it sounds, I don’t even trust myself, yeah

This hurts me because the song talks about not being able to trust people in general so I feel like this has been Logan all his life, Mona after she was betrayed, and Colt after the death of his father (minus the don’t trust my lover part because obviously they are whipped for MC and you can’t change my mind).

Undercover, Kehlani [p]

You know they don’t wanna see us together / But it don’t matter, no, ‘cause I got you

Baby, they don’t wanna see me be happy / ‘Cause they ain’t happy, no -- they don’t got you

So this is MC with all the LI’s because everybody (Riya, Darius, her dad, etc.) thinks everyone in the crew is bad news but no matter who MC is with, they’re happy with them regardless of what everyone thinks.

Party Monster, The Weeknd [p]

Okay, this might seem really weird, but I feel like this is a song that would play in the background as the crew would plan or orchestrate a heist you know like the camera panning to different people just really focused on that they’re doing like there’s some camera work going on in my head that I wish I could properly articulate but I hope you guys see the vision.

Shut Up and Drive, Rihanna [p and j]

This is self explanatory.

#playchoices #rod logan #rod mona #colt kaneko #choices playlist #rodaw #playlist

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burkymakar · 5 years

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Random Nolan as a bf headcanons? Can sfw or nsfw

i’m gonna do safe bc that was a LOT i wrote last night lol

when you go out in public together, he’s also so sweet when he gets recognized. if people ever flirt though, he just subtly puts his hand on your waist and they get the hint.

double dates with travis and his girlfriend!!

(just because this is funny) his picture to mark u two as “instagram official” is a picture of him, you and gritty with the caption “stole gritty’s girl”

and gritty responds “can’t stand in the way of young love” with the broken heart emoji

nolan is a big fan of netflix and chill, lazily making out with you with some dumb tv show on in the background

not the sexiest white noise but ur boyfriend more than makes up for it.

once a month, u and nolan try one new thing. one month it’s a pottery class, and the next it’s axe throwing. sometimes the other boys and wags come with, and then it gets crazy

you wear your patrick jersey to his games and cheer for him whenever he does well, even when he gets into fights

(hell, especially when he gets into fights. when he gets in the sin bin, he searches for you in the crowd and licks his lips every so slightly, thinking of sinning with u)

he sometimes ties his hair up with one of ur hair bands and he looks like a canadian pebbles flintstone

when his migraines get really bad, you turn off all the lights in the apartment and let him rest his head on your lap. you run your fingers through his hair and just be there for him.

sometimes he needs to be alone too. and you miss him and want to help him so bad, but you give him his space and wait for it to pass.

you also try to cook together but mostly u just end up burning pans and then ordering delivery

he gives you piggyback rides when ur heels make ur feet hurt or u just wanna feel tall.

his new superstition is u kissing him on his cheeks before the game

if u say anything abt how rosy they are, he pouts

wearing!!! his!!! clothes!!! wish i had something more clever to say, i just think his clothes look super comfortable and i hope to steal them as his gf one day

#asks #anon #mywriting #nolan patrick imagine

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pbandjesse · 4 years

Text

Today was a pretty nice day. I still dont love my schedule. I wish I had more morning. But Im getting used to it. Im getting a routine. Im trying.

But I felt a lot better. I dont know why I keep having these hard nights. I like just couldnt stop crying last night and it was just not fun. So I woke up with swollen eyes. James tried really hard to make me feel better but I was just. Very fragile. But I felt better this morning.

I woke up and felt alright. I just scrolled on my phone a bit. James came in let me know the leg wound wasnt bothering them as much. So that was pretty good. He was getting ready for work but held me in bed for a bit. But he had to get on his computer and so I got up to get dressed.

My eyes were swollen but I felt pretty cute besides that. I felt sort of weird but I got dressed and ready and decided before breakfast I cleaned the apartment. I vacuumed and swiffered and tried to clean the bathroom a bit. Jess is coming tomorrow night and I dont have a ton of time to get the space nice for company. So Im trying my best to fit in the time. James has so much work tomorrow that he wont be able to do much. Maybe change the sheets. But thats okay. I handled what I could today.

I finally had breakfast after I swiffered the floors. I had about an hour so I did a jewelry drawing. I continue to hate drawing chain. But the actual pendant part was fun to do. I think as the drawing goes it will be much better because I can find the chains behind things.

I made hot chocolate to bring with me again. Packed up my art stuff. And headed out. I still left to early but that was okay. I took my time getting myself together when I got there and washed my hands and it was all good.

It was a really fun day honestly. The group was real small today. When I got in there were 10, but soon there were 8. And then 7. It stayed at 7 for the longest part of the day. But having such a small group for most of the day was fun. I got a little frazzled when I found out Travis wasnt going to be in and I would be alone. So I was nervous. But it ended up being fine. The morning teacher stayed a little later to help and get all the kids on their computers and checked what assignments were missing. So for about an hour they were all catching up on work and that was really good. Felt productive.

We also did more sewing today. I had the child who missed the sewing catch up and he ended up really taking to it and made 3 different plushes. And some of the other boys also really jumped into it and made more toys. It was great. We also worked on those god eyes where you wrap yarn around popsicle sticks. I couldnt exactly remember how to make those so I had two of the boys try it to workshop it and when I realized what was wrong I asked if I could take them apart and they said yes but then the one had a meltdown and we had to do some deep breaths and then he was all good and I was very proud of him.

We had a weird meditation yoga class. It was just breathing. So when the kids asked to do stretches I lead them through a little yoga after that and we had lots of laughs.

We did some more art after that. Played games. It was fun. It was not as much running around but like. I think thats alright. Im going to talk to Travis about possibly splitting the group sometimes I dont think all of them always want to be in the gym. So I can have a quiet group. I think that could be nice.

The end of the day was nice. I just had 2 kids for most of the last hour. It was funny when I "caught" one of the littles watching minecradft youtube and I was like. Its okay! You can watch it! But you looked so guilty!! Stop that haha! Someone is going to think youre doing something really bad.

I did some classroom decorating. And then the last child left. I had been doing a little crochet but I was more than happy to go home. We had a meeting at 630 but that was alright. It would be nice to have an hour to just chill.

It was very warm outside! Most of the snow has melted now. And the walk was nice. James was making us indian food and the apartment smelt really nice.

My last gift for James finally came and they got all smiley and excited when they saw it was a neat little train puzzle. Made me really happy.

I dyed my hair and we had dinner. And then I had my meeting. It was nice to hear some shout outs from the manager and she made me feel very welcomed and liked. We are also supposed to have the News come to the site tomorrow so Im a little nervous but it will be okay. It will be a good day. Im willing it to be so.

I went to work in my studio. And cut sweetP's nails. And now I am ready to go wash the dye out of my hair. And get some rest. I hope you all have a great night tonight. Sleep good. Be happy.

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kingofthereapers · 4 years

Photo

Lincoln was going about his life, getting Brooklyn up and ready for the day. As things had gotten more serious between December and him, the two of them spent just about every night together. It was odd to call her his girlfriend, because she felt like so much more than that, but in all honesty, it was what December was to him. From time to time she even watched over Brooke when he had to go to work. It gave his mom a break every once in a while. Link knew that Brooklyn loved it too, because Dee not only gave her presents, but they played dress up and the clothes that were in his girlfriend’s closet weren’t anything like you would see on a daily basis in Amesbury. Suddenly, Lincoln heard the soft ringtone going off on his phone. The blond man padded around the house, trying to find just where he’d left that stupid cell phone.

By the time he’d found it there was a missed phone call from Hank Maddox. The two men worked together at the shop. To say that Hank was like a second father to the young man would have been an understatement. It wasn’t like there was anything wrong with the relationship that Link had with his own father, but Hank was the voice of reason that he needed sometimes. He called the number back and waited for an answer. When the line was picked up and he heard the older man’s voice on the other end Link smiled, some of the nerves in his stomach going away. Hank wasn’t getting any younger and sometimes he worried that something would happen to the man, despite him being in great shape. “Hey, I couldn’t find my cell.” Link admitted with a chuckle, because he was notorious for misplacing the thing.

“Son, you should come down to the hospital.” Hank’s deep voice sent chills down Lincoln’s spine and his brows furrowed. “What happened? Are you okay? Is Lula okay?” His mind went straight to the fateful night some years ago that he’d been in the hospital for his wife. The prayers didn’t work, because she didn’t survive. He tried pushing those nagging thoughts from his mind though as he focused on what Hank was saying. “Travis was in a bad accident.” Despite what had happened between the two men, Lincoln still didn’t want to see Travis hurt, or to be dead, but when he heard of the accident he half wondered if it was actually an accident after all. Travis had quite a long list of enemies that didn’t always pertain to the club. It always seemed like Travis had his hands in some kind of mischief. “I’m on my way.” Link muttered and hung up the phone without so much as another word.

Lincoln felt numb as he turned to walk down the hallway to the bedroom to find December. “Babe…” His voice sounded somewhat hollow, and different even in his own head. “I have to go, Travis is in the hospital.” He said simply, his greenish blue orbs slightly wide as he was still trying to process just what was going on. He took a deep breath and tried his best to fake a smile for her. “I’ll see you later, you have Brooklyn, right?” He checked before turning to go. It wasn’t often that Lincoln rode his motorcycle anymore, unless it was for club business, so without a thought he jumped into his little red pick up truck. The vehicle was perfect for lugging around tools and parts for the cars that he worked on both at the shop and at home. It wasn’t anything fancy as it chugged along, making a lot of noise, but not going so fast, but it worked for Lincoln.

His stomach began to tie in knots as he approached the hospital, because he hadn’t been there in a couple years. He could remember the feeling of hopelessness he’d felt as he walked up the sidewalk to the emergency room entrance, wondering if he would have to say goodbye to his wife in the next couple minutes. That was exactly what he had done, although she was just about gone by the time they’d let him in the room. “Can you tell me where Travis Davies’ room is?” Link asked at the front desk, surprised he didn’t vomit straight onto the woman glancing up at him as he spoke. “Room 54.” The nurse replied after a couple taps on the keyboard in front of her. “Thanks.” Link replied before he was off, wandering the halls and trying his best not to lose what little was in his stomach this early in the morning. As he found the rhythm of the rooms, with each step that drew him closer to Travis’ room, he felt more and more sick to his stomach.

A large 54 was written on the room just to his right and the blond man paused outside the door as he took a couple breaths and then pushed the door open. He’d half expected to see Travis and Lula in some inappropriate position on the bed, but before he could even see the bed he heard the beep beep beep of the machines. He caught sight of Lula hunched over in a chair beside the bed, sleeping probably and as Hank got up from his chair in the corner that also caught the attention of the blue eyed man. Only when his gaze fell on Travis in the bed did his brows furrow and the numbness went away, replaced by a bubbling feeling of anger.

Slowly the tall, lean man made his way over to the side of the bed opposite Lula to gaze down at the man he’d spent countless hours with for as long as he could remember. This had been his best friend growing up. They had gone hunting together, and Thomas Davies had taught Link how to skin and gut a deer when he was about 10 years old. That seemed a lifetime ago with the way things had gone as they’d grown into men. It was around that time in fact that Travis began to drift away from the kid he’d always called his closest friend. The fairer sex became just that much more important to the man that now was laid up in the hospital bed with tubes and wires all over the place. Even then, they’d go fishing and ride their bikes and go four wheeling for hours on end. Some nearly twenty years later, Lincoln couldn’t tell you who Travis spent most of his time with besides the ever present Lula Maddox.

Here he was though, standing over the man that had had an affair with his wife, then killed her when she found out she was knocked up with his kid. This kind of man didn’t deserve to live in Lincoln’s book, but all in the same one, it was his friend. There was some obvious torment going on with Lincoln as he stared down at the dark haired man and Hank woke Lula to see if she wanted anything from the cafeteria. Lincoln silently watched the interaction and then his gaze fell upon Lula as she realized that he was standing there silently. The three of them went back to when they were in diapers, so it hurt to see Lula crying, even if it was over a man that treated her like shit. He wasn’t expecting the words that came out of her mouth, but they stunned him to the point that his heart skipped a beat. “Bo….Walker?” Lincoln confirmed, his eyebrows knitting together even more, causing his head to ache. “How do you know?” Link’s mind was racing, one of his hands coming up to run through his hair to push it back from his face.

Bo was their enforcer. The man was obsessed with rules, and rightfully so. He was the one to make sure everyone was following those rules. For him to go as far as to try and kill their president was almost too far fetched to believe. There wasn’t time enough for Lincoln to stick around for the reasoning though, because he knew Bo would be on the run, at least for a while. Until he could explain himself to the club. With enough reason they would be forgiving after all. Lincoln began to step back slowly and then he turned to head for the door. “I love you, Lula.” He said softly to her, his eyes as clear and focused as they had ever been before he turned to go down the hall to retrace his steps. The blond man ended up back in his pick up, wishing he’d brought his bike this time around. Speed was not on his side, but he took the roads as quickly as he could until the paved roads ended about fifteen miles outside of town, and his truck crunched over the gravel path that took him up a rather steep incline that eventually flattened out into a large grassy field. His truck bounced across the greenery until he parked in front of a small cabin that was tucked between a grouping of pine trees.

The house was little more than a one bedroom cabin, perfect for camping, or hunting. That was exactly what the group of men linked to the Reapers used it for. Right in front of the steps that led to the front door was Ian “Bo” Walker’s bike. No one in town had a bike quite like Bo, and in fact many people could pair the two together in a lineup because it’s outrageous decor just suited the also outrageously tattooed man. Link gave the back tire of the bike a small kick as he passed it and went boldly into the cabin without so much as a knock on the door. Bo was sitting there, waiting for him, though his well groomed brows rose when he saw just who it was. Lincoln was the last person in the club he would have expected to come after him. The two men were not equally built either, so Bo settled into his seat with a bit of a smirk while he holstered the gun he’d had trailed on the door.

“Lincoln.” The man spoke through his large beard with his chocolate hues trailing the blonde man that paced in front of him. “You know it was a long time coming.” Boy, did Lincoln know those words to be true, but this wasn’t the way it was supposed to go down, and he showed his distaste for those words with a slow shake of his blond head while his boots thudded against the wooden floor of the cabin. “It’s not your place.” Link muttered, blue eyes trailing along the floor in front of him before he came to stop straight in front of the older man. “He is supposed to be mine.” Link growled, eyes narrowing before he began to pace again as that burning anger began to bubble up in the pit of his stomach. “He killed my fucking wife!!!” Lincoln then screamed, although he knew killing Travis wouldn’t make him feel even the slightest better, and it sure as hell wouldn’t bring back Bethany.

Bo stood up, trying to make himself look as big as possible because he didn’t appreciate getting yelled at, even if it was by his vice president. Lincoln glared at him. “You gonna try to kill me too?” He snapped to which Bo’s eyes grew wide. “Try? The fuck you talking about, man. There is no way he survived that.” Lincoln laughed, stepping further into the cabin, near the simple kitchen with little more than a spot for a propane fueled stove top. His oil stained hand reached out and he flicked on the switch to one of the burners and a small whoosh could be heard as the propane tank opened, though no flame showed up because Link didn’t hold his lighter up to ignite it. “You stupid idiot, he is still alive, barely, but he is alive and this lands on me now.” He explained to the other man standing behind him. “Our enforcer can’t be trusted, and who does it always fall to? I have to pick up the pieces.” Lincoln sounded like he might have been on the verge of tears now as he spoke, but in a movement Bo hadn’t been expecting, Lincoln turned and pulled out the handgun that was tucked in the back of his pants.

It wasn’t a fatal wound, but just one to disarm the other man almost completely, because he had little, if any use of his right arm. His left arm reaching across for his gun was a much slower movement, and Lincoln was an excellent shot. The younger man took a few steps towards the older man as he stumbled and sat back down in his chair. Blood was pouring from his arm and it wasn’t looking good if Lincoln just drew this out long enough. “You should have said something, Bo.” Link muttered softly, his brows furrowed again. This was the last thing he had wanted to do, but he couldn’t let the club see him as the weak one anymore. He’d been in this club damn near as long as Travis, and he had done nearly as much. This had to put him at least in the top rankings for the club. He held up the gun again, aimed straight between Bo’s eyes and the older man knew he wouldn’t miss. “Please….” Bo shifted, though he wasn’t reaching for a gun, or begging for his life, he was asking for a different method. The older man held out a small blade that he’d carved and sharpened himself as a young boy. “Use this.”

Link stepped forward and took the wooden handle of the blade that was offered and then he flipped the knife in his hand for a moment. “You’re a good guy, you know that Bo?” The older man gave a nod of his head and offered a sad smile. “I’m ready to see my sweetheart. I’ve missed her a lot.” Lincoln pursed his lips and gave a solemn nod of his head as he raised the blade above his head and slammed it down as hard as he could into Bo’s neck. The blade made a loud thud when the hilt connected with his skin and the blade wedged against his collar bone. Lincoln gazed down at the large man as the light slowly began to leave his eyes. It was a sight that wasn’t completely unfamiliar to Lincoln, because he’d been hunting his whole life, but this was the first time he’d watched the death of a person. He stepped back slowly, eyes filling with tears as he then turned back to that damn propane stove. It had been the bane of his existence when he’d been hunting as a kid, so he was going to be glad to see it go.

Link turned on the other three burners so the propane was being pumped right into the room as quickly as it could be. It was a decent sized tank that they had sitting under the counter too, so Link knew this would do some damage. The blond man took one last look at Bo sitting there in his chair with blood seeping from his neck and his shoulder. “I’m sorry, ol’ man.” Lincoln said softly as he stepped out into the early morning sunshine. He hadn’t realized just how much the cabin smelled like blood until he’d gone out into the fresh air. He took a deep breath and steadied himself against the railing on the porch as he finally hurled right into the well maintained bushes. After wiping his mouth on his shirt Link walked out to his truck and got in and looked around for some rope. There was a hank of rope just waiting for him underneath the passenger seat. The blond man snatched it up and began to untwine it until he had about enough to cover the field and lead right up to the door. That was exactly how Lincoln laid the rope out, tipping a bit of gasoline from the near empty gas can in the back of his truck onto the rope every couple feet.

From across the field, Lincoln looked at the old cabin. It had been a home away from home, and sometimes a haven when he just needed to get away as a teenager. He could even remember a time or two that he and Bethany had snuck in for a little action as teenagers. The thought made him laugh, but the joy didn’t linger on his face. Blue orbs trailed down to the end of the rope in his hand until he pulled his trusty lighter from his pocket. Times were changing and it was time for them all to grow up. The Reapers wasn’t just fun and games. They were serious about this shit, and Lincoln was on board for taking care of business in any way he saw fit. There wasn’t a way that anyone else was going to pull one over on him again. Not Travis, not Bo, not anyone. The flame popped up from his lighter and once it was close to the rope it took off, and faster than Lincoln had expected. The blond man jumped into his truck and began the bumpy ride back down the gravel road. Seeing that house go up in flames would have been the icing on the cake, but Lincoln didn’t have time for fun and games anymore.

#Lincoln Albrecht #TheReapers #Amesbury NC #creeping darkness

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bonelesswords · 5 years

Text

a study of souls | alex høgh andersen au

Chapter six: kiss you goodnight

gid credit: @lol-haha-joke

masterlist

Warnings: Language, sexual content, mentions and using of drugs, mentions of a toxic relationships, grammar mistakes (english is not my first language)

note: I came back with this one aaaahh, if you like it let me know and if you didn’t let me know as well, feedback is appreciated.

Once again this week, it starts raining over my head and the already wet ground. I jump around, trying to avoid the loose tiles next to Rory, who tells me that Julia’s only excuse for not reading The Great Gatsby is that she always forgets to buy a copy, because there was none in her house. Rory says it’s incredible not to have read the Great Gatsby at twenty-two, now twenty-three years. This is how he came up with his birthday present, which he brings into his hands now.

“She will be happy, I’m telling you. You will see that I am the person who makes the best gifts of them all.”

I laugh as we go to the street of Julia’s house. I try to act like I’m not nervous as fuck, because the truth is that I haven’t stopped thinking since Rory called me to tell me that Julia would like me to attend her birthday because I got along with her. My mind hasn’t stopped wandering around the name of Alex. I don’t know anything about him since I left his car last Saturday, the idea of seeing him in just a few seconds makes me almost anxious, but no one could know, the only people who know what happened last week are just him and I.

“Julia still lives in her parents’ house.” Rory whispers to me, as if she were going to listen to us. “They have a huge house, I don’t blame her. With all due respect.” He jokes, referring to me.

“I don’t live at grandma’s house!” I reply indignantly “We share the house, we live together, I pay the bills too.”

“Of course, June, sometimes I forget you’re an angel.” He retracts himself by shaking my hair, I laugh before I realize that we are at the end of the street, in front of a house, in fact, quite large.

Rory rings the bell and after a few seconds, Julia opens the door with a smile too big on her face.

“You were already late!” she says and greets us with big kisses on our cheeks and invites us to go to a small hall with many pictures with pictures on the walls, She goes ahead to one of the red doors before looking back at us. “I’m glad you came, June.” She smiles at me and I smile back, I like her.

“Sure, happy birthday.”

“Thank you, now come in, I made pizza today.”

We enter into a living room illuminated only with warm lights, as the entire room seems to be decorated. All of them are sitting on cushions on the floor, surrounding a coffee table with a large pizza in the middle and many glasses. Everyone turns around to greet us, my stomach turns around when I see Alex and he looks at me, he sketches an almost awkward smile and directs his gaze to another place in two seconds. Was he as nervous as I was? Or maybe that didn’t mean anything?

I sit next to Julia and right in front of him, which is uncomfortable even for me, but why? If the last time we met we had a good time. After thinking about it all week I had come to the conclusion that Alex didn’t owe me a kiss, despite having implied that he liked me, and almost doing it. He repented, that is a fact, however, in a scenario in which he and I have our eyes on each other, the discomfort is remarkable, the tension could be cut with a knife. “Happy birthday, Julia. I owe you.” My brother says reaching the rectangular wrapper for her, who grabs it with enthusiasm. “Now you won’t have any more excuses.”

Julia breaks the wrap and when she sees the book under it, her face lights up with a big smile, as big as when she opened the door and laughs happily, thanking him.

I grab a slice of pizza and the night begins.

I take the glass of beer to my lips while I stare at Jack, who is in the middle of an anecdote, I have noticed that Jack makes a lot of effort to tell them, because he does a whole act before, imitates the voices of the people involved, their movements, makes long and suspensive pauses until the joke arrives, and I jump, trying not to spit the beer on someone’s face when it makes me laugh so much that the liquid could get out of my nose. Jack seems to enjoy when people laugh at his jokes, he likes to make them laugh, so he laughs at my reaction and my effort to keep all the liquid in my mouth and not spit anything on the floor.

“Oh, come on June, what do you think?” He asks, crossing his arms over his chest. It’s very difficult to look at Jack at all, just because Alex, who hasn’t spoken to me since I arrived, is sitting next to him, I can feel how he looks at me every second.

“Me? I don’t think I’ve ever fucked on a first date” I answer, Rory shakes her head as if he didn’t want to have heard that.

“You think!?” He exclaims and I burst a laugh .

“Because you didn’t want it or because it never happens?” Asks, this time, Evangeline.

“Because there was no place for the situation.”

“What if there was?” Helena inquires now, as if she wanted to torture Rory with that kind of information. The only thing I can think of is Alex’s face, but I do my best not to look at him, otherwise I would turn as red as a tomato.

“I mean, If I wanted to, why not?” I say and turn to see my brother, who covers his face with his hands, making me laugh.

“Oh my god, Rory.” Travis shakes his head, ruffling rory’s hair.

“Besides,” Julia begins “when you’re on a first date, after so many kisses at some point you have to feel like moving on to the next base, right? It’s normal”

Alex and I are completely silent and I wonder at what point the conversation began to take that path. Julia turns to me, fully aware of my sudden silence.

“God, no June, don’t make that face.”

“What face?” I ask laughing.

“That face that you don’t kiss on first dates.“

"I’m not making that face!” I protest amused. “I always try, at least.” The words come out of my mouth almost on purpose, almost too much on purpose.

“No, June, a kiss is the minimum step that has to be taken on a date.”

“Julia! You can be afraid!” Travis reproaches her.

“Afraid of what, Travis? The girl said yes, something has to mean. You’re not sixteen anymore”

“If a guy don’t kiss me on a date he’s afraid.” Evangeline states.

“Or maybe he just regretted it.” I point this time.

“There’s no guy who would regret taking me on a date.” Evangeline says again and everyone bursts into laughter, including Alex who the conversation seemed already too uncomfortable for him.

In the middle of laughter my eyes meet Alex’s and they stay that way for a few seconds, it’s almost intimate how only him and I know. A chill runs through my back when he stays serious for a moment and then looks away sharply.

For the rest of the night, Alex does not speak to me again, even when I try, the answers he gives me are short and abrupt, I wonder if he really got angry at what I said, because he only behaves like that with me, as if the person he is now and who I went out with a few days ago are not the same, as if suddenly he stopped liking me. Julia, however, distracts me. She talks too much, she doesn’t finish talking about one topic because she has already started talking about another, but it keeps us all entertained. She opens five debates at once and seems not to get tired until others understand her point, which is a bit difficult for Travis, despite loving each other a lot, they differ even in the least, and it is obvious that Julia doesn’t like to be contradicted much, and it is even more obvious that Evangeline is tired of hearing them discuss when she has rolled her eyes more than five times in four minutes, but the rest of them find it funny hearing them fight. Even Alex comments from time to time, sometimes in favor of Travis’s opinion and sometimes of Julia’s, prompting them to continue arguing as if they were two children.

While I find Alex right in front of me, it takes me a second to sort all the thoughts in my head but above all, be clear with myself: I might like Alex, yes, but he didn’t seem to like me, despite having said it, maybe he regretted it in every way.

Fuck.

There is no way to order my thoughts, it seems impossible, all I know is that today, Alex is more handsome than usual, as if he had planned it on purpose. His denim jacket makes his eyes look more blue and when he run his fingers through his hair, it is messy and he doesn’t bother to fix it. I feel so stupid when he makes me sigh. The thought hits me overwhelmingly and too cheesy when I find myself silent, looking over the glass full of beer, I wish that day in his car, the safety belt lock had not sounded and that he had kissed me. Nothing else. Sometimes he catches me watching him, and sometimes I catch him watching me. I could swear that every person in the room can feel the tension in the air, but no, it’s just him and I.

Julia gets up from the cushion ready to bring another pizza from the kitchen, she asks me for help to bring some drinks and I follow her to the next room with empty plastic bottles in my hands.

“My parents aren’t home for the whole weekend.” she explains “That’s why they are all here today. They went to a friend’s cabin or something like that before everyone came. We celebrated my birthday today at noon.”

“Are you going to be alone all weekend?” I ask. Even if it was my house I wouldn’t spend the night alone here, it is too big, too dark. None of the halls have enough lighting, if I didn’t see the light bulbs above my head, I would swear that the house is only lit by candles. In her house seems more autumn than it is outside.

“No, of course not. I would die of fear. I invited Evangeline to stay today, and Jack tomorrow. We’re going to make a sleepover.” She says and remains silent as she begins to put small pieces of cheese to a pre pizza until she looks up, her eyebrows raised, as if a light bulb had lit on her head “You should stay!”

“Me? No, I don’t have pajamas.” I shake my head but she denies.

“What about it? I have lots! You should stay. It’s a plan, okay? You’ll stay. Evangeline and me would be bored anyway.”

“Do I have a choice?”

“No, you don’t. I’ll take you home tomorrow if you want.”

“That would be great, I don’t even know how to get home from here.”

Julia lives in a neighborhood quite far from mine, one where you walked and you found a house bigger than the other, I had never been to those places, if I had to take the bus alone I would get lost in five minutes. Grandma and I live in a nice neighborhood, I can’t complain, but that was something else.

She puts the pizza in the oven and leans against the counter. “You know, June, I have this thing that I can easily read eyes and there’s something about yours,” She says amused, tilting her head to the side. It makes me laugh, although it’s hard to know if she speaks seriously or not.

“Do I have weird eyes?” I ask her laughing.

“No, but they say a lot of things. Like, tell me June, do you have a boyfriend? A girlfriend?” She inquieres, crossing her arms over her chest. I sigh, oh Julia, if you knew that my love life is a disaster.

“Neither of them.”

“Oh, I knew that.” She jokes.

“I don’t look like someone who could have a boyfriend?” I laugh and she shakes her head, too into the conversation now. “No, actually. That’s why I asked you. You got this tired look, June. I will find out why you have that look, not now, maybe, but anytime soon. You know what I mean?” I nod, I know what she means, so I give her a bittersweet smile. Was it very ridiculous to ask myself if she was right or not? Of course I was tired, not physically, but I was, quite a while ago. It’s unusual that she notices.

“Yes, it’ll be fun watching you try.”

“YES! And I’ll start tonight because you’re staying, right?”

“Right.” I confirm and she dramatically changes the subject.

Julia strives to know me more, tries to include me in all the talks, to explain jokes that I don’t understand, to tell me who they are talking about when a name that I don’t know comes up.

“I saw Theo today, Alex.” Travis says with a smile forming on his face.

“Yeah?” Alex asks, a little hostility sneaks into his voice.” Did he talk to you?“

"Yeah, he ask me about your pretty face” Travis replies covering his mouth in the middle of a laugh before finishing the sentence, Alex rolls his eyes. “He said that since he left your face like a walking bruise you haven’t been to the club.”

Travis!“ Helena scolds him. "Don’t you realize that the kid goes crazy?”

“Tell him that I’m making him believe that I’m not going anymore so when I come back he won’t expect that I beat the shit out of him.” Alex replies angry and the room is full a sound of “uuuh”, but Travis explodes in laughter and Alex rolls his eyes again.

“You aren’t going beat the shit out of no one Alex, chill.” Rory laughs, bringing a glass of beer to his lips.

“I’m beating the shit out of you, Alex, if you come black to that shitty club.” Evangeline reproaches him.

“No one is beating the shit out of no one! It’s my birthday.” Julia bangs her fist against the table.

“Technically your birthday was yesterday, Julia. It’s after twelve, so …” Jack mutters through the whole murmur, rolling up his shirt as if he were about to start a fight, and in two seconds, everything is laughing again, although Alex keeps a frown for a few more seconds and pulls out his phone and doesn’t pay attention to anyone for five minutes.

It is no surprise how fragile the ego of men is.

Night passes and when I tell Rory that Julia practically forced me to stay at her house, he gets happy. Everyone is leaving, including my brother. Now the only one left are Evangeline, Travis, Alex and me.

“I want to pee so bad.” Julia hisses making me laugh.

“And why don’t you go to the bathroom?”

“Because I’m afraid of the hallway upstairs.” She explains with a worried face.

“I go with you, if you want. I also have to go to the bathroom.”

“Well, thanks. I’m also going to change my clothes because I’ve stained myself with pizza sauce.” She says pointing to an orange stain on her pink shirt.

I nod and she let everyone know that we are going to the bathroom. Julia leads me through the hall where we entered when we arrived with Rory and I start up the stairs behind her. She turns to hear footsteps behind me, I do too, and a few steps below me, is Alex.

“Do you know that there’s another bathroom there, right?” Julia asks.

“Yes, but I’m going to this one for the same reason as you, Julia. You should put new light bulbs in that hallway, it’s scary.” Julia rolls her eyes but keeps going up the stairs.

The corridor of the second floor is large, has four doors in total and is only illuminated by a small orange light, it was true, the halls of Julia’s house were scary. She walks at full speed to the last door, squeezing her legs and stumbling, enters the bathroom and closes the door tightly. I lean against the wall, crossing my arms.Alex imitates me and leans against the opposite wall, looking me in the eye. I raise an eyebrow.

“What are you watching?” He asks hostile.

“I’m not seeing anything, I just have eyes, in case that confuses you” I answer with a frown.

“Yes, I know, those have been looking at me the whole night.” He mutters suddenly and takes me off guard. I open my mouth in surprise, but he doesn’t seem to be, a devilish smile appears on his lips, too amused.

“I though you were the one who were looking me all night, Alex. For a minute I though you became mute.” The sarcastic tone sneaks into my voice, causing him to roll his eyes.

“Maybe I just way afraid of talking to you.” He narrows his eyes, referring to a few hours ago, when almost all the girls agreed that the least you had to do on a date was to kiss, if not, you were afraid.

“Oh, it is about that?” I ask without waiting for an answer, but he nods, waiting for him to keep talking.“ Look, Alex, you don’t owe me a kiss, we were just kidding. ”

“Do you think I was afraid of kissing you?” He whispers serious while taking a step towards me, at that moment my pulse goes crazy.

“I mean, if you were it’s okay. I understand.” I whisper as well, all that is heard in the hallway are whispers now, and hissteps slowly approaching to me.

“Afraid of what?”

“You know what..” The words stay in the air and he sighs, stepping closer. My heart beats at full speed and I’m almost sure he can hear it, but I don’t say anything, nothing happens. I listen to his breath, I listen to mine. “Of Ror…”

“I’m not afraid of your brother!” He interrupts me annoyed. “Why would I?”

“Again Alex, it’s okay if you are.” I say calm, but he is still upset, his brows are so close to each other I suspect they hurt.

“I’m not, June. In fact, I think you are afraid of your brother.”

“Me?” I ask laughing “That’s bullshit.”

“Why are hoy whispering, then? Are you afraid that one of Rory’s friends hears of what we are talking about?”

“I’m whispering because you starte…” I begin to say but before finishing the sentence, he grabs the back of my neck, drawing me towards him to stamp his lips against mine. His right hand goes up my waist and I can swear that there is no more space to separate us, my abdomen is on his. His kiss is not rushed or abrupt, but it is soft and slow, but it is enough for all emotions to explode in my stomach and my breathing may shake perhaps too much. His hand goes up and down on my waist to the rhythm in which his thumb of his left hand draws invisible circles on my neck, both movements burn on my clothes and my skin. Suddenly, the bathroom chain makes a rumble throughout the hallway, I can feel it when he is startled and leaves my lips abruptly. I feel a little disappointed when he leans his back on the wall, right next to me. After a few seconds, Julia opens the bathroom door with another shirt on.

“Okay, I’m going down stairs, Be quick, Alex, so I can say goodbye to you. Yes, I’m kicking you out.” Julia says starting to move down the hall.

“Always so sweet, Julia.” Alex’s chest rises and falls to the rhythm of his agitated breathing, I can feel my heart beating in my mouth, but Julia does not notice, she keeps moving forward while singing a song I don’t know.

We both froze in our places while we listened to Julia go down the stairs and then close the red door of the hall, only then we are sure that there is no one in this part of the house.

That’s when he grabs my wrist and only in one movement, he drags me into the bathroom. My heart skips a beat but the emotion mixes with the surprise when I see how big Julia’s bathroom is, it is so large that it looks like a public bathroom and has a large mirror that extends over almost the entire wall.

“I have never been in a bathroom so big …” I say looking at the ceiling and Alex smirking without paying much attention to the place, then grabs me by the waist again and stamps me against the bathroom door, as if he was making sure no one entered. I put my hands on his chest laughing nervously when he catches my lower lips with his teeth, hesitating before kissing me again, In a completely rushed kiss now, but just as soft and loud, I always hated loud kisses, but in this moment I don’t care.

His fingers sneak under my shirt and it doesn’t take long to put his tongue back into my mouth, making me hold on to his gray shirt. His cologne takes me out of balance, and I don’t realize how much time passes when I realize that I am in the bathroom of a person I met no more than a month ago and that I should not be sucking the lips of another person in this place. I separate from him a little, but his lips look for mine again.

“Alex…” I wishper breathing heavy and he takes a little step black nodding.

“Yeah, I know, I know…” He hisses ruffling his hair, he has a side smile stamped on his face and I’m sure i’m completely red.

“Did you prove your point?” I joke fixing my shirt with my hands.

“I kinda did, didn’t I?”

When we return to the living room, Travis is ready to leave, apparently Alex and him are leaving together since Rory is fixing Travis’ motorcycle. Travis gets a little distracted by telling Julia what happened to his motorcycle, so Alex takes advantage.

“I’m not leaving without your number tonight.” He whispers once again. I try to hide my smile and all the feelings that run in my body in this moment, but yes, I fail.

“Another mistake you made the other night.”

“I’d kiss you goodnight if I could.” He whispers, perhaps too close. I bite my lip and God, he didn’t need to say that.

“That’s the cheesiest thing you ever said. “

"You’re still giving me your number, c'mon, we don’t have much time.” He rushes me and pulls out his phone from his back pocket and opens the contact list. I dictate my number and he saves it. He puts his phone again in his pocket and that same arrogant smile returns to dance on his lips.

“Goodnight, Junie.”

I leave the bathroom dressed in Julia’s pajamas and run in the dark to her room closing the door behind me. Julia is arranging the mattresses where Evangeline and I are going to sleep, I turn to Evangeline to help her with the pillows and when everything is ready for us to sleep, Julia sits on the mattresses on the floor, staring at me.

“You know what I asked Evangeline the other day, June?” She asks me when a smile begins to widen in her face.

“Julia?” Evangeline narrows her eyes, not quite sure what her friend is going to say next, but Julia doesn’t pray attention to her.

“See, I asked her if she thought that I had an opportutiny with you, because, let’s be real, you’re really pretty and, believe me, I like pretty girls more than anything in the world.” She starts, confuses me a little, but then, like an idiot, I realize what she’s talking about, Julia is confessing that she likes me. “And Evangeline said "maybe, you have to ask her first”, and I was going to do it, so I invited you tonight to see if you like girls.“ JUlia explains, I’m still little confused, frowning. My gaze goes from Evangeline to Julia, and from Julia to Evangeline. The first one looks like she wants the earth to swallow her, apparently her friend could be making a fool of herself. "But that asshole Alex, oh I swear I hate him.”

“Alex!?” I exclaim, but Julia finds it funny.

“Yes, baby don’t play dumb with me, I heard you two arguing in the hallway, and worse, I heard you kissing each other like you were about to fuck.” Julia spits and I don’t know if I should laugh or cry.

“What?” I ask laughing nervous, Evangeline is as confussed as I am.

“Oh my god, June did you kiss Alex?” Evangeline screams jumping in her place.

“Maybe?”

“Maybe!?” Julia snaps. “I don’t know what was more red, if your lips or your face.” Evangeline burst in a laugh and I cover my face with my hands.

“Was it so bad?”

“Yes! But the worst thing was that stupid smirk of him! Damn, June. I thought I had a chance with you.” She shakes her head with closed eyes. “He is the worst, once I like a girl he decides to kiss her in my house, that’s unfair.” Evangeline keeps laughing so I know that Julia is just joking about hating Alex.

“We can still be friends, you know?”

“We sure can, but I mean, you could have chosen any of the boys and you chose that asshole?” She asks trying to sound funny now, I sigh.

“He’s nice to me…” I murmur “And, I don’t know, I like the way he talks to me when he’s not flirting”

“Oh, June! I’ll pray for you, that idiot never knows what he wants.” Evangeline says wrinkling his nose.

“I’ve kissed bigger idiots than Alex, I’m sure.”

“Poor kid, Evy, shut up. Alex is the nicest guy ever. He’s still kind of a prick but the nicest guy ever. But you have to tell us how the hell that happened.”

I sigh and when I’m about to start talking, my screen lights up with a message from an unknown number. It’s a simple emoji blowing a kiss.

#alex høgh #alex høgh imagine #alex høgh andersen #alex hogh #alex høgh x reader #alex høgh fanfiction #Alex høgh andersen fan fiction #ivar imagine #modern ivar #ivar x oc #ivar x reader #ivar fanfic #alex hoegh andersen

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estelanel · 4 years

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Mighty Nein ep. 92

“Hi, I’m Beau, I don’t give a fuck. Fuck you, dad.” - “That’s pretty good, actually.”

“Is there a book on old women in woods who can grant wishes?” - and on strange women lying in ponds distributing swords?

That moment between Fjord and Beau was so Soft.

yES!! I KNEW IT!! Ahh I love those bandits.

Look, Fjord just rolling with Caleb’s shenanigans in that chill way he doesn’t run with anyone else’s makes it hard for me to drop that ship. XD

“It felt like there was a lesson here, and I’m pretty sure we haven’t learned it.”

Beau: gives a necklace to her 2-year-old brother TJ: immediately puts it in his mouth Laura and Travis, parents of a 2-year-old son: yup.

You know, Daddy Lionett. When you’re talking about raising your own child you don’t get to play the ‘both sides’ card. Because one side was a grown-ass adult parent, and one side was a fucking child.

“Many years ago I was granted a wish by that same witch, and I turned into this as a result, so I hope that doesn’t happen to you. Bye. - And I will steal literally anything.” Sometimes I don’t know if it’s Sam or Nott I’m applauding, but I kinda laughed out loud at this.

Also, man. Yasha can sure be intimidating.

Wet group cuddle. <3

#Nane watches CR

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pothead-on-the-run · 4 years

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How would the gang + travis react if they had a crush on someone?

💙Sally💙

~ He is probably super awkward around you at first and doesn't know what to do with himself, but then once you guys get a little closer he's not as weird around you. ~ I feel like he would be a little bit protective of you, but it would be subtle ~ Like, if Travis would walk by Sal would get closer to you ~ Or when you guys are ghost hunting and stuff, he would constantly make sure that you're ok and you're not too scared or anything ~ And god forbid somebody hurt you, he would go fucking ham. But he wouldn't let you see. ~ He would keep a calm composure for you, but he is fucking r a g i n g on the inside. ~ Who in their right mind would ever try to hurt somebody as perfect as you? ~ Also, he definitely hugs his pillow sometimes and pretends that it's you ~ That's not weird, is it? ~ So basically he's a shy little bean but he would give the world to you if he had the chance 🧡Larry🧡

~ Is the opposite of Sal, in which he is not awkward whatsoever. ~ Except maybe if you get a bit close to him, but most of the time he's super chill ~ He probably wouldn't even try to hide it ~ He would probably tease you and call you pet names and stuff all the time ~ He would be super protective of you ~ Like, if Travis walks past you guys in the hall or something, he is guarding you as if Travis is going to pounce at any moment. ~ You honestly find it kind of amusing, but sweet at the same time. ~ He's kind of similar to Sal in the sense that if anybody hurt you he'd be pissed, except Larry probably wouldn't hide his anger as much. ~ Whoever hurt you is honestly as good as dead in his eyes ~ Also, he will often times call you at like two in the morning asking if you wanna smoke some dope with him in his treehouse

💜Ash💜

~ She's probably the most chill out of everybody ~ Like, you'd never guess that she had a crush on you until she straight up tells you ~ Although she's usually pretty chill, she's also secretly the jealous type ~ But she'd never let you know that she's jealous of somebody ~ She would stare at you in class and stuff, just wishing that she could hold your hand and kiss you and do all of that cute couple stuff ~ Todd would be the only person that knows that she likes you ~ "Ash, you need to focus. You have a test tomorrow." ~ "I know, I know! I just can't stop thinking about Y/N..." ~ She would also have a playlist dedicated to romantic songs that remind her of you ~ She'd also memorize all of the small details about you- your schedule, what time you arrive at lunch, your favorite perfume/cologne/body spray/good smell... ~ So yeah, she loves you 💚Todd💚

~ Haha, if you think Sal is awkward when he likes someone, you are in for something. ~ Whenever you enter the room, Todd's mind turns to that of a toddler, because it's just so fixated on you ~ Also, he'd go into a lot of denial about liking you, because he doesn't want to act like little kid everytime he sees you. ~ After a few weeks to a month, he starts to get used to it though and goes mostly back to normal ~ Like Ash, he would be quick to find out everything about you. Your favorite food, your favorite song, your favorite color, everything ~ That means that he would immediately notice if you were starting to fall behind in any subject or class, and is quick to offer his help ~ He would also quickly notice any changes in your behavioral patterns; if you seemed extra tired, extra petulant, or anything else like that ~ He would try to offer his support to you, even if you try and tell him that it's nothing ~ Basically he is just the physical human embodiment wholesome husbando material

❤️Travis❤️

~ o h n o ~ You know how some people pick on people they like? ~ Well this mans takes it to a whole nother level ~ He throws every slur in the book at you, and don't even get me started on the beating up ~ But like, he definitely cries about you when he’s by himself. ~ then you catch him crying in the bathroom 😳 ~ He won’t straight up say “I like you haha” but he’ll probably stop being as mean from there on out. ~ After a while he might even come up and start talking to you. ~ And then he’ll start asking to be partners on group projects. ~ And then he’d get really sweet, calling you pet names and teasing you. ~ He is a completely different Travis from the one you first met ~ He even stopped beating up Sal! ~ So, yeah he really loves you and he’d kind of do anything for you <3

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miraclesnail · 5 years

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When your primary ship in a big fandom are crackpairs or rarepairs 😞

And for PJO that has to be Will/Travis and I wrote a fanfic on how I think their dynamic will work! rather than study for microbiology like a good student

[Travis]

Travis Stoll. Son of Hermes. Head Counselor. A prankster. Can pickpocket and steal like no other, a prodigy in that sense.

A decent swordsman.

A slightly above average bowsman.

And absolutely incapable of being remotely serious.

Even when the situation direly calls for it. Even on the verge of death, is too lax. Even seconds away from passing out, got to get one last joke in. Even when I’m about to nag his ears off for being too careless, will nod attentively with a stupid, stupid grin and do the stupid, stupid thing again.

Ask me what I find attractive about Travis, and I’ll definitely say its not his unhealthy love for pranks. His desire for some ‘fun in his very boring life as a yearrounder’ sometimes (most times) bringing only pain and misery and even acrimony. And even though he apologizes, the very next day he’s doing it again.

Travis doesn’t learn. Not from lectures. Not from mistakes. Not from him or Chiron. Only Connor can change his behaviors (and Connor doesn’t. Connor only just encourages and pushes Travis to go further by bringing Travis’s ideas to fruition.)

Travis is tactless. He jokes around when no one should be and he says stuff that never needs to be said. ‘No, Travis, you shouldn’t be joking about how Clarisse is a chicken for not wanting to enter the labyrinth again. And you shouldn’t be joking about your dead half-brother actually being Olympus’s savior when he was the one to start it all. And you really shouldn’t be joking about breaking into the camp store in such precise detail when Chiron is right there.’ But he still does it.

Travis is careless too. How does someone set landmines on the wrong hill? Seriously? When there are only so many hills at camp? And that time during the 2nd titan war when he wanted to raid a candy store, who the heck thinks of such things in the middle of a freaking war?! I wonder sometimes how he made it this far in life with his attitude. Maybe it’s his brother. Connor’s (only slightly) more level headed than Travis.

But even though Travis can be too casual at times, and too careless, and his morals sometimes delve too much into the grey, he’s a kind friend and a kind brother.

He likes to have fun. To live life to the fullest. To laugh and smile as much as he possibly can. To never waste a second regretting the past. Even when some of his pranks backfire on him or when he gets caught and cursed, he doesn’t dwell on it for too long. I met people who said they don’t look in the past, but Travis is the only one I know who commits to it. Snide comments. Unkind gestures. The Sneering and taunting he’ll get from other campers simply for being Luke’s half-brother back during the Second Titan War. He really doesn’t linger on any of that even though it gets my blood boiling.

He doesn’t hold a grudge towards any of them and that’s admirable. If it was me, I would have made them beg for my forgiveness, maybe made them do some of my side chores. It grates on my nerves whenever I recall those years. The fact that he refused Luke even though he’s his brother, even though almost all of his siblings followed Luke, even though he knows first hand how neglectful the gods are, Travis still refused. That counts for something.

Travis is also stupidly powerful. I don’t know anyone who can get into so much trouble yet still find a way out. 90% of the time, he gets away with his pranks because nobody can prove he and Connor set it up. That takes skills. He once moved live mines from Ares cabin to the other side of camp. Not anyone can just move landmines but he somehow did.

He has a soft side too. It’s not really hidden, but it’s not really apparent either. I can see it whenever he welcomes a new camper to his cabin. Or whenever he says goodbye to a newly claimed camper. Although I find it debatable when Travis teaches his cabinmates how to beat anyone at poker, he truly offers them a home in his cabin.

And whenever he tried to teach me how to pickpocket or how to lie with a straight face or even shoot an arrow, he’s so patient. Even though I am so bad at it, he doesn’t laugh or make fun of me. He doesn’t give up on me even though I never make progress.

I try.

I really, truly do try to aim, but after years of faulted attempts, most people give up on me. Even Chiron did eventually. But Travis would still follow me to the archery range. Travis would still be in the same room as me as everyone else hurries to leave. Travis would still stay as my arrows go everywhere but the bullseye. Travis would still give me advice. Travis would still follow me again the next day even if I utterly failed today.

“It’s okay,” he would say calmly as an arrow thunk a centimeter to the right of his knee cap, “You don’t have to be perfect at everything you do.”

I’ll admit, Travis worries me some time with how carefree he can be and he may be morally gray at times, but when it comes down to it, he just wants people to know life is fun.

And I guess that’s what I like about him.

[Will]

Will Solace.

What can I say about the Will Solace? He’s a son of Apollo. He’s blond. He has blue eyes. And he can be a total prick, but I guess that’s what draws me to him.

Will is talented at so many things, but he also sucks at many things.

Do you all know Will is very bad at thievery? Pickpocketing, lockpicking, even just lying or fibbing, he’s bad at it all. He can’t keep a straight face and will starts talking faster and faster and faster. It’s adorable. He’s so honest and righteous, I don’t know why he ever liked someone as dishonest and shifty as me.

Back during the battle in Manhattan when I volunteered to get some medical supplies, Will actually told me to leave money. Who the heck thinks about businesses when we’re right smack in the middle of the battle of the century? Will Solace, that’s who. Only Will Solace.

Oh, and Will is bad at being… what’s the word? Compassionate? Kind? Merciful? Sympathetic! He’s not very sympathetic when it is absolutely needed. He’s blunter than unsharpen pencils. Normally, he’s a chill person but if someone is being bullheaded, out comes his fangs. He says what he thinks even though he doesn’t know the full picture. When he told Nico di Angelo that the camp’s dislike of him was all in his head, I wanted to wince. I know Will means well but he didn’t had Nico living in his cabin for a couple of months.

People were scared of him. People did avoid him. Maybe nobody outright confronted him, but they all certainly gave him a lot of space. When it was game night, only Connor or I would partner up with him. It wasn’t all in his head.

Will is that way with everybody.

Luckily for me, I have skin made of titanium. Years of pranking and getting caught and suffering the worst humiliation I ever can has made me immune to all criticizations.

“Travis, you’re never going to make friends if you piss everybody off with your pranks. Travis you can’t keep using comedy as your coping mechanism for everything. Travis, stop bottling everything up and talk to someone.”

I admit Will can be pushy and forward, but his heart is in the right place. He just has an indelicate way of showing it.

Will is also awful at archery. He’s remarkably bad actually. It’s one of the few things he’s insecure about. He can be surprisingly fragile when it comes to that. Hours of training and nothing comes out of it. I feel like when Apollo was deciding what to gift Will in, rather than distribute it evenly across healing, archery, music and prophetic abilities, Apollo just shove all he can into healing.

Maybe that’s why Will is so great in his medic role. He is the best healer of this millennia. I don’t know how his whole healing power works but it’s crazy taxing on him. And the more monster related the wound is, the more power it takes to heal it. He almost passed out trying to heal Annabeth back in Manhattan. You would think Will the health fanatic, the perpetual worrywart, the ‘If you shadow travel one more time, I’m going to seriously handcuff my arm to yours’ Will Solace would limit himself. But no. The guy goes and goes till he gets the job done. Either the person is healed or he passes out.

I wish he wouldn’t do that.

I wish he knows it’s okay to not be 100% perfect.

Will tries more than anyone I know. I would have given up archery after a month of training and no improvement. Just write it off as a lack of talent, you know? But not Will. He goes and goes till his fingers are blistered and his arms ache.

Will is incredible sort of in that way. He’s incredibly hardworking. He’s incredibly ethical. And he’s incredibly nice.

Will genuinely cares for everyone. Even for someone like Octavian who was seconds away from destroying our home. I’m kind of ashamed to admit this but I would have let Octavian go. I might have even lighted the cannon myself if given the chance. Because if it was Octavian's life over my brother’s, over my siblings, over my friends, over Will’s, I wouldn’t hesitate.

Will is genuinely nice, remarkably nice, even to someone like me, to someone like Octavian, to the point I worry if he’ll be taken advantage of.

But his unconditional kindness is what I like about him.

(Tell me what you think! Good, bad, okay, down to hell, up to heaven, or just plain nothing. I’m okay with it all.)

#Willvis #Will Solace #Travis Stoll #percy jackson #heroes of olympus #ao3 #fanfiction #somebody please #make content for them other than me #not saying I'm needy for validation but like...#validation is great #my writing

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princessamericachavez · 6 years

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Fjorester in Episode 47

They might be leaving the ocean for a while soon but this ship is still sailing strong and unstoppable.

Let me tell you guys, I was stressed out this holiday season thinking of all the ways things could go when we returned, it was a constant cycle of highs and lows for my little shipper heart: Fjord pinning (high!), Jester pulling away (low), Sunflower (high), You’re Someone Else (low), their answers on talks (both?)

But oh boy oh boy did this episode restore my fragile little soul with some much needed softness like:

Jester’s little flirty “oh, hi, Fjord” right after killing one crab and before fighting the other like a badass.

F: “Jester, that was very impressive, I must say” J: “What? Oh, you mean that little Inflict Wounds I did?” F: “Yeah, that and the use of the lollipop, really nice touch.” J: “Oh, yeah, that lollipop is pretty freaking cool.”

I love how this is a continuation of two things:

a. Fjord being increasingly aware of Jester during missions, thanking her for her help in the jungle, keeping her close in the Diver’s Grave, being impressed when she does something badass...

b. Continuing Fjord’s efforts to bridge whatever feels broken between them as he has been doing for 3 days after the dragon fight.

J: *goes outside to look at the crabs* F: “Careful if you head out there, you don’t know what’s above you.” N: “He cares about you.”

Again, I love how this is a continuation of Fjord being extra protective of Jester after the dragon too, like how he tried to help her then, tried to make sure she was okay after and shouted at her to get out of danger during Yasha’s lightning fight.

A++ to Travis in consistent continuity.

Also I love how they both roll their eyes at Nott’s remark, it feels very “she’s not my girlfriend” trope-y which is hilarious to me

Nott insisting they both go out to drag a body as if it was the most romantic of dates lmfao

I appreciate Nott’s efforts but I wish they weren’t so on-the-nose sometimes haha

J: “Could you ask your god?” F: “How do I do that, Jester?” J: “Like I do with the Traveler” F: “He just answers you when you talk to him?” J: “Yeah.” [...] F: “Could you ask him?”

I love this two comparing their deities and their relationship with them, trying hard to understand where the other is coming from but struggling because they only have their own godly experiences to go by.

Also the cleric/warlock dynamics? Especially with how different their deities are? How drastically distinct their communication methods are? How different being chosen by them feels to both of them? GOOD SHIT.

“What if the chamber closes and you’re stuck in here, Fjord?”

And then, speaking of faith, Jester praying to the Traveler.

Now, I wanna take a moment to talk about this because we are talking about a very religious and spiritual person, someone whose faith is so powerful that it has granted her magic and the favoritism of her deity.

We are talking about Jester reaching out to the Traveler, her god, her oldest friend, the one she has chosen to devote her life to, the one that recently saved her life when she felt most abandoned... and asking him to look after Fjord.

Can we take a minute to consider just how much that means? Even when she’s confused by him, when she has been distant, when she’s brokenhearted, her priority is that Fjord is safe and alright, so much so that she trusts him to her deity as a personal favor.

“Hey, Traveler. So I know that he’s like doing something for this other god guy but we both know this other god is pretty stupid...”

AND BY PRETTY STUPID SHE MEANS VERY DANGEROUS AND SHADY AND SHE’S SO WORRIED

“...so if you do me a favor and you, like, you know, watch after Fjord that would be really great because you know he’s done a lot of things that have really helped out to do stuff for you...”

PUTTING A GOOD WORD IN FOR FJORD WITH HER GOD

“...and he’s gonna be pretty helpful in helping me get to you later this year...”

EVEN WHEN DOUBTING WHO HE IS AND BEING CONFUSED AND SAD AND TIRED, JESTER HAS ONE THING CLEAR: THAT FJORD WILL SUPPORT HER AND BE BY HER SIDE WHEN SHE NEEDS HIM

“...so yeah, anyway, I really like you and I really like him and I would like if you could help out. Please. Thank you.”

SHE IS LITERALLY PARALLELING HER LOVE FOR FJORD WITH HER LOVE FOR HER DEITY. CAN WE. JSUT. ÑDJFAÑF

And this is great all of it’s own, but to make matters even bigger Fjord hears it all.

Now let’s consider this. Fjord, who told Beau after the Iron Shepherds that he hasn’t had many kindness shown his way. Fjord, who knows Jester has gone out of her way to help him in his goals from the very start. Fjord, who still feels guilty over leaving her with that dragon. Fjord, who can feel her pulling away and probably thinks she’s furious at him right now.

And then Fjord hears all this, done privately, not for show or flirting but born out of honest concern and kindness. No wonder he’s Soft Af as he sits before her.

I love the image of him approaching Jester and slowly bending down until he’s sitting right in front of her, coming down to her level so that they are face to face, and in her metaphorical ground, her deity.

He comes down and meets her after she’s been chasing after him during this arc, when she pulls way, he reaches out and takes the initiative to come to her.

It’s just so meaningful you guys!!!!!

Even when Jester pulls back again, tries to act distant as she has been doing for days, “can I help you?” she asks trying to sound cold

but unlike before Fjord doesn’t fall for it, because he just heard the truth a second ago. “What did he say?”

And there’s a moment of panic as Jester realizes he heard that, because the only person Jester opens up to more than Fjord is the Traveler and to be caught in that moment of vulnerability is probably off-putting to her (think how she reacted the first time she was overheard by Beau)

She tries to play it off, as if she was waiting for an answer, even if the Traveler has been keeping some distance lately, and Fjord, bless him, gives her an out.

“Jester.” “What?”

HOW DOES TRAVIS WILLINGHAM KILL ME WITH THE DELIVERY OF A SINGLE LINE

He is so soft. Look at the way he looks at her.

“You don’t have to tell me. It’s fine. I appreciate the sentiment.”

AND SHE TRIES TO SPEAK BUT SOMETHING HOLDS HER BACK

whatever she wanted to say, an apology, a declaration, a confession, it gets stuck inside her like it rarely happens with Jester, but Fjord knows her, he doesn’t need words

“It’s okay. You can go.”

AND HE SAYS THIS WORDS, LIBERATING HER OF RESPONSIBILITY AND GUILT, because Fjord knows Jester, he knows she has been by his side every single step of the way, he knows she promised to heal him if something happened, he has seen her been quiet this whole time as he convinced the others to leave him behind and he knows she hates this plan and the idea of being far from him if something goes wrong... but he’s not about to risk her in this, not after the first temple nearly claims her life (remember the kiss? wink wink)

So he’s reassuring, instead, acting calm and in control so that she will be able to leave him behind.

“I really hope he does help you.”

“Me too.”

And there’s that long pause... where they stare at each other and they are heavily aware of everything that could go wrong

LOOK AT THEM

JESTER IS SO WORRIED, SO SAD, SO CONFLICTED

BUT FJORD IS JUST CONTEMPT, JUST LOOKING AT HER WITH SO MUCH LOVE

BECAUSE THIS BRAVE GIRL WOULD STAY HERE WITH HIM WOULD DO ANYTHING TO PROTECT HIM

HE’S OKAY WITH THIS ENDING AS LONG AS SHE’S SAFE

HE’S NOT SCARED BECAUSE SHE’S HERE

*plays Sunflower in the background and sobs quietly*

“Be safe, Fjord.”

LISTEN SHE JUST CARES SO FREAKING MUCH EVEN AFTER EVERYTHING, ESPECIALLY AFTER EVERYTHING

“And also,” Jester leans in with a smile and Fjord leans too, mirroring her naturally, sharing a secret, knowing this part of the script by heart: this is the part where they lift each other up.

“Don’t turn evil,” she says, and she smiles because as much as she has been doubting him, in this moment it feels like she knows it won’t happen, but just in case, “but if you do I’ll still be your friend, you know some people are evil it’s not big deal.”

“Just... don’t turn evil to me.”

Don’t leave me.

Don’t forget me.

Don’t turn on me.

There’s almost a dark taste to this phrase, to this moment, to the idea that even if they break the world together, Jester would be okay as long as he stays by her side. Which is unlikely, knowing her, but still it speaks to a depth of sentiment that carries danger (remember the Briarwoods?”

Fjord laughs, he’s about to face his patron, he was super serious and nervous a second ago, but she makes him laugh.

“Or anyone else? Just you?”

“Really any of us would be nice but-.”

“Deal.”

“Okay.”

And that little shoulder pat, like she needs to touch him for an instant at least to reassure herself and feel him here, maybe for the last time.

okay okay okay okay okay moving on before i keep screaming forever about this wonderful moment

Jester staying behind with Beau to wait for Fjord to come out.

I know it’s ooc but Travis’s face when he realizes she rolled a Nat1 in her Dex safe and gets hit by falling debris as a result was wow

Fjord crushing even harder on Jester every time she is a total badass like with the clutch control water that saved them all.

“Jester, I didn’t know you could mess with water like that.”

“Yeah, Fjord, haven’t you seen me control water before?”

Do you ever think about how showy Avantika was about her new found power and how she used it as a bargaining tool to seduce Fjord, and how far Fjord was willing to go to get that power for himself too, and now he sees Jester not only having it (he’d seen it before but eh memory) but using it in a way more badass way to save him and his friends. The parallels, man, the parallels. And she’s so chill and nonchalant about it, which is wonderful too because it feels like whatever tension there was between them after the dragon has faded away (for now)

Fjord being 110% on board with Jester’s tattooing shenanigans was hilarious to me

“My first priority was just getting Jester to her mama for a hot minute if we could.”

This boy is finally getting his priorities straight and I love how as soon as this whole orb/temple madness was over he was ready to stand back and act as his usual self again, which must definitely be reassuring for Jester too.

Especially when he brings up how he hoped to have a vision about Vandran again, which as someone had pointed out before was a weird area between Jester and Fjord where she almost seemed more intent on finding the old sailor than he did.

Here we see his priorities stated, and you can feel Jester’s relief

Even when he again rejects the idea of messaging the Plank King (I suspect more out of fear of it having negative repercussions or revealing something disheartening about his mentor).

J: “You should give [the strength potion] to Fjord”

F: “Fuck off.”

J: *carries him* “I’m just kidding.”

THE FRIENDLY BANTER IS BACK Y’ALL

THINGS WILL BE ALRIGHT

Anyway who else is excited about going back to Nicodranas and the Empire and the Gentleman and Traveler Con and Beau and Nott’s backstory and the War and Vandran is alive holy shit I can’t wait????

#fjorester #fjord #jester lavorre #critical role #cr spoilers #sofia's nonsense

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unwarrantedopinions-blog1 · 5 years

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“NINE” by Blink-182

So for my first “official” blog post, I figured I’d write about something near and dear to my heart. My favorite band, Blink-182, released their new album “NINE” 09/20/2019. As soon as I heard it, it sparked some sort of energy and interest in me to blog a review. It started out as a journal, but with some encouragement and motivation from my friends, I was able to pen a full review and now, post it. So here it is, my complete review of the album “NINE” as I heard it for the first time, with additional information added with subsequent play throughs.

1. The First Time - 2:27

Upbeat, loud drums, distant yelling. Cherish your first times for any occasion. Memories about taking risks, taking chances. What are you going to remember when you’re old?: the memories you made taking risks or the times you played it safe? Take risks, try new things, experience life. Still wishing Tom DeLonge was back, but his replacement, Matt Skiba (also the frontman of rock band Alkaline Trio), is fitting in perfectly fine with Mark and Travis.

Final: 8/10.

2. Happy Days - 2:59

Sounds very reminiscent of “Stay Together For The Kids”. A song about being positive when you don’t know what positive even is, don’t know what’s going on, don’t know what your next step is. “I want to feel happy days”. Memories triggering sadness, not doing enough, feeling like you aren’t enough. Yet, at the same time, still being content in your life. Still pushing, still trying, still working to achieve your true happiness. It’s like you can acknowledge there is room for change, but you don’t know if you can yet. It’s a first step, though, and sometimes that’s all it takes for everything to fall into place.

Final: 9/10

3. Heaven - 3:17

First thought: existential crisis. Impulsive actions. Self destruction. From good to bad, not getting into Heaven based off of prior actions. Struggling to better, but falling short due to lack of effort. A feeling of being forgotten, left behind, not fitting in because of your choices. “We’re lost in our ways, nothing left to say” .. “we’re stuck in our ways, I’ve got so much to say”. Acknowledging the need to change, but not actually changing.

Final: 7/10

4. Darkside - 3:01

Observing a mysterious, unknown girl. I get an 80’s vibe from this song. Waiting, waiting, waiting. Following someone into the unknown for a new journey, to a new world, an unknown place. New experiences. Sounds kinda synthy at the bridge. The fading of the loud voices make it sound more like a yell.

Final: 7/10

5. Blame It On My Youth - 3:06

Airy sound, bass comes in, Mark’s angel voice. Growing up in the past vs growing up today. Apologizing for differences in their youth vs how they are in adulthood, but ultimately saying to blame it on how they were raised. We are in a completely different time now than what they were when they were growing up. “I don’t need an excuse”. What was socially accepted then ( ) vs now (maybe 2016 on), they are two completely different time frames and have two completely different socially acceptable norms.

Final: 7/10

6. Generational Divide - 0:49

Heavy drums. Work in progress adjusting to life before and life after? This is probably the most confusing bit in the whole album. The rating is more for sound than message since it was so short and I didn’t get much out of it.

Final: 8/10

7. Run Away - 2:28

Sounds very two albums ago. Childish rebellion, teen angst vibes. Possibly a song about blaming others for your actions but still getting left with the responsibility. Running away from your problems, but hoping someone holds you down to own up to them. Definite “Neighborhoods” vibes based off of the sound alone. Another great Blink album.

Final: 7/10

8. Black Rain - 2:46

Starts slow with Skiba vocals, then the pace picks up and it’s loud singing by Mark. Chorus comes back in and is slow, lighter than during Mark’s part. A song about struggling with loss. Mark’s voice seems far away when listening through a phone or TV speaker, different when you’re wearing headphones/earbuds/etc. “Tragedy erased my memory and now all I see is this black rain. Tragedy, you too my everything.” Sound is actually kinda shit in conjunction with their voices.

Final: 6/10

9. I Really Wish I Hated You - 3:11

This song hit hard, it’s very relatable. “Cuz I really don’t like myself without you, every song I sing is still about you. Save me from myself the way you used to, cuz I really don’t like myself without you. I really wish I hated you right now. Won’t you say something?” Being broken with someone you clearly love, not knowing what to do without them, unable to cope with them being gone. A longing for someone you wish you could have because you gave them your all, you tried your hardest, but love being too strong to stay. Stuck in the past, thinking, reminiscing. Hard to let go of someone you care about, even though you know they are better off without you. You start to feel like a burden and it doesn’t even get better. “I hate the way you’re better off” .. basically letting them go because you know it’s the less selfish thing to do if it means they’re happy. You can’t keep someone for your own benefit.

Final: 10/10

10. Pin the Grenade - 2:59

Another song about losing someone, life changing and going on without them. Not being able to let go, t hint to drag it out as long as possible. Not worth losing someone compared to being dead. “Just another night before I’m lost and all alone. If you’re gonna kill me, baby, please just do it slow” .. dragging out the torture of being killed to get more time with that person you love.

Final: 9/10

11. No Heart To Speak Of - 3:40

Remembering a life you had before, losing someone, being heartbroken over the memories you keep thinking about. There’s nothing left for you here. “Laying on the bedroom floor, hanging on the words you said before” .. “Dying on the bathroom floor, thinking of the life we had before”. When you’re so heartbroken, is it worth staying alive when you don’t have that person who made you whole? The sound overall is good, reminds me of “Ocean Avenue” by Yellowcard based off the sound alone. I love the range of Skiba’s voice, from soft and lull to loud and emotional, almost strained.

Final: 9.5/10

12. Ransom - 1:25

“Say the word and I’ll be there”. Sounds kinda trappy. Like SoundCloud trappy. Two opposites attracting, becoming one. A guy obsessed with a girl, uprooting his life to be with her across the country. Trapped. Ransom.

Final: 7/10

13. On Some Emo Sh** - 3:10

Missing someone so much that your current life is put on hold. You remember things so vividly that it interrupts your current life. Questioning why you exist without that person who made your existence seem painless, easy, worthwhile. Memories, flashbacks, stories, all about someone you still love. “These feelings pound in my chest, maybe I am better off dead.” Still leaving yourself 100% open for someone you love that takes advantage of your soft spot for them. Is it happiness you’re after? Or is it the fear of being alone? Is there a sliver of hope left that things will fall back together eventually or are you just torturing yourself holding onto that hope?

Final: 8/10

14. Hungover You - 2:59

Fuck this song, first of all. Second, I absolutely love it. Super relatable for someone, anyone, that has had their heart broken. Maybe even for people who have broken hearts. If you’ve broken a heart, does this open your eyes to the feelings you left your significant other with after you were gone? The overall sound, the breakdown on the chorus, and the way Hoppus and Skiba harmonize gives me chills. The only song that I found myself screaming along to while I was driving. Can’t get over someone, they disappeared from your life. “It was just one time, one time. Started turning into two times, a few times”. “It feels like last night, you come over. And now I wake up, and you’re nowhere.” Is this even real? Is this a drunk hallucination? How long has this person been gone that he can say he’s “still hungover you”? Shouts out to Travis Barker on the drums, this one is one of my favorites because of the work he puts in with the sound.

Final: 10/10

15. Remember to Forget Me - 3:30

Sounds like a song that represents giving someone your all, being broken into tiny pieces in the process, and then all those tiny pieces being scattered. Sounds like some soft dubs in the second verse. Not sure of how to exist on your own without your person. Lack of ability to be independent. Kind of sounds like you want someone to get rid of every thought, memory, trace of you when they forget you. Don’t even think about me in the future. Erase your memory.

Final: 8/10

FINAL THOUGHTS

Well, I obviously fucking love Blink-182. I was always a little skeptical about Matt Skiba taking over for Tom DeLonge, but at the same time, I was never a fan of Angels and Airwaves (Tom’s other project), so I feel like it could be a reasonable compromise. Personally, the lack of vibe balance throws me off a little. You start out super happy, upbeat, encouraging, and then the whole album takes a turn into missing someone, losing someone, feeling completely lost without someone. And honestly? I fucking felt that shit. You can only be so positive when you feel like you’d be better off dead. The last, like, 12 months of my life have been absolutely chaotic and I’ve lost so many people from friends, fuck buddies, boyfriends, family members, wherever it is, I’ve probably lost it. I’ve made a lot of big life changes and shit so this album actually kind of hit me hard. Only two 10/10 songs, but a lot of 9s to back it up. The two 10/10s (“I Really Wish I Hated You” and “Hungover You”) made my “Top Songs To Scream Along To” playlist for when I’m driving and feel hyper, bummed, emo, etc.

I’m not entirely sure what I expected from NINE, but I don’t think that I was necessarily disappointed either. I like the sounds, I like the progress, all the guys are doing great together. They just did a tour with Neck Deep and Lil Wayne, including a few shows guest starring my favorite band All Time Low out in Ohio. It was a really fun album to review. I’ve listened to it all the way through a handful of times, writing over them between two instances and the rest just trying to listen without pressuring myself to make something out of it, but instead just to vibe and understand.

The big difference with this album is that it’s so serious. This Blink album is honestly so mature, there’s no dick jokes or short interludes about fucking someone’s mom. It’s super foreign territory for Blink to delve into, but I respect the change and enjoyed the album just the same without the jokes and silly antics. Another thing with this album is that I heard a lot of throwback sounds and I actually fucked with it heavy. Hearing an old song’s tune in a different way actually made the album kind of nostalgic. The beginning of “The First Time” has big time “Feeling This” (Blink-182 self title, 2003) vibes. On top of that, “Hungover You”, (yes, I’m obsessing over every aspect of this song), has BIIIIG “Snake Charmer” (Neighborhoods, 2011) sounds with the maraca/salt sounds. Almost every song on this album, if not for sure every album, has throwback sounds in a different pitch, frequency, order, etc. and I’m actually really digging it. The synthy sound from “Ransom“ is a dead ringer for the beginning of “Love Is Dangerous” (Neighborhoods, 2011), which is the last album that featured founding member Tom DeLonge. The sound itself isn’t spot on, but the concept of the sound is what is familiar. I don’t know if this was intentional, but regardless, it’s an interesting take on the new sound playing off the old sound.

So, what did you think of the album? Did you hear any other similarities between albums or notice any big differences between old Blink and seemingly new Blink? Comment down below what you think and suggest some new albums that would be worth a review! There you have it, an opinion nobody wanted, but y’all are getting it anyway.

#blink-182 #tom delonge #mark hoppus #matt skiba #travis barker #alkaline trio #blog post #music blog #follow #music #pop punk #punk rock #everything

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