#i'll never be the same after that song tbh

[littlespoonevan]

when hozier said "do you think i'd give up? that this might've shook the love from me" and "if someone asked me at the end i'd tell the put me back in it" and "heaven is not fit to house a love like you and i" and "so someone with your eyes might come and hold me like water or christ, hold me like a knife" and "the memory hurts but does me no harm, your hand in my pocket to keep us both warm" and "i will not be great but i'm grateful to get through, the feeling came late, i'm still glad i met you" and "i remember the view, streetlights in the dark blue, the moment i knew i'd no choice but to love you" and "if there was anyone to ever get through this life with their heart still intact, they didn't do it right" and "i don't need to know where we begin and end, i'd still know you, not being shown you, i only need the workin' of my hands" and-

[eggmeralda]

drowsed and drugged out on migraine medication and for what. music sounds the same

[mismatched-sockss]

Where I never dared to stand

» Pairing: purely Spencer Reid x fem!Reader [NO JEID whatsoever] » Wordcount: 4k » Warnings: JJ's POV (3rd person), based on Where I Stood by Missy Higgins, we're staying within the realms of canon with this one - this focuses on JJ's feelings and my own interpretations regarding those, spoilers mentioned for s12!Spencer and 13×01 300, heavy spoilers for 14×15 Truth or Dare, kind of for 15×02 Awakenings too (i used a part of the conversation between JJ and Reid about what happend in 14×15), reader is Garcia's college roommate & friend, no time line mentioned but first meeting of Spencer and Reader is said to happen somewhere after JJ married Will to mid s10 (so somewhere from s8×01 to about s10×12, reader and Spencer are together when s10×13 happens), no mentions of Maeve only a vague mention that the last years have been rough for Spencer), » A/N: multiple mentions about reader being a woman / female, use of she/her pronouns, no body description, no mentions of readers clothes --- pls take a look here for more info about my reader descriptions in general » IMPORTANT!!!: i just want to say that i hated the way the writers where forcing the climax of 14×15 through out the whole s14 both on the characters and us, and i hated just about everything about the whole thing in general tbh, (after making Will such a big part of JJ's life JEID was over and done with, i never liked them as a ship in general; just wait until i'll unleash my hate for JJ in the future (hate only regarding the way she is treating Spencer, otherwise i like her for the most part)).... the only reason this fic happened in the way it is, is because i lost track of my initial plan when i got inspiration from the song, but then i kind of got carried away while writing; i tried to capture and bring out JJ's inner conflicts, the guilt she feels about all of it etc

Jennifer Jareau liked you from the moment she saw you, no doubt about it. There was something about you, that uplifted the whole room you were in; it was hard to not be in a good mood when you were around.

Penelope had brought you along for a girl's night one evening. You had been her dorm room-mate in college and fate brought you back into each other's lives, when it just so happened that you moved into the same building she was living in. From then on, you joined them for girl's night on most occasions and it was just a matter of time until Penelope invited you to a party where not only the girls would be attending, but also the rest of the BAU team. It so happened to be Penelope's birthday party.

Everyone could see the sparks fly when Spencer and you met each other then. One look at the both of you was enough to see it; that this was a once in a life time, soulmate kind of thing. The kind of love you could only find in movies or books, the stuff all the cheesy romance movies JJ liked to watch were made of.

Something had stirred in her heart when she saw the two of you interact at Penelope's birthday party; a small ache, something she couldn't quite place at the time. So without further thinking about it, she brushed it away, forgetting all about it in the following days. That is, until the next time she saw the two of you. Together.

It was at one of Rossi's dinner parties not too long after Spencer and you met. Everyone was already accounted for in Rossi's backyard, except for Spencer. The doorbell rang and Rossi went to open the door; when he got back a big smile was plastered on his face and he was wiggling his brows suggestively. After him, Spencer walked in. With you. Holding hands.

Then and there the ache found it's way back into her heart, a little more persistent then the last time. This time she knew in an instant what it had been.

Jealousy. She couldn't stand your hands on him.

At the realization she had felt dizzy. Had it been any later in the evening she probably could have blamed the dizziness on the wine. But the glass she held in her hand was her first and she had barely nipped on it. No, it was because she was jealous, and the guilt she felt at the same time collided with it and mixed into an even bigger ugly thing that almost swept her off her feet.

Here she was, standing next to her husband and the father of her child, feeling jealous over another woman holding hands with her friend; a friend who she knew once had a thing for her, a friend who she may have had a thing for herself at one point but never even had went on a date with - actively avoided it even, if you thought about it. A friend, who she shouldn't have any feelings for that would call for her to be jealous when he got romantically involved with someone else.

A friend, she instead should be nothing less than happy for, after all the shit he had to go through in his life. She should be happy, that he finally had something good in his life, something that made him smile, something that made him happy. All she wanted was for him to be happy.

Will had commented that Spencer and you looked good together, that you made a cute couple. No matter who much that jealous part of her hated it, she had to agree.

That night at Rossi's she drank a couple more glasses of wine to flush out her confusing emotions than she maybe should have. When someone said something, she successfully played it off as being able to let go for an evening since her mother was watching Henry for the whole weekend. Luckily Will was okay with it, and even was pampering her the next day when she had a bad case of hangover.

After a short time, when JJ had sorted out her feelings, she really was happy for Spencer. So incredibly happy for him; that he had found his person. His safe haven. His forever.

And everyone could see it. That the two of you were perfect for each other.

She didn't think she had seen him this happy since... Ever, actually. Life had never been exactly easy on Spencer, but the last years had been especially rough for him. You were his rock when Gideon died, were there for him when his mom got worse and additionally stayed with her when he had to leave for a case after he took her in – oh, how much Diana loved you. You were the only person except for Spencer who she would let come close when she had an episode and was chasing the nurses away he hired. After he had been arrested in Mexico you as good as moved into his place to help (the nurse with) Diana. Whenever JJ came to visit her with the boys, she was amazed by the way you cared for Diana, so patient and understanding and affectionate, and how she would let you take care of her.

When Spencer had to go on mandatory leave after prison and the whole shit-show with Cat, JJ watched as you broke down the walls he had build around his heart in those three months he was locked away. She watched as you crumbled them down until you reached him again and then you gave him a new ground to build on, a ground back in safety and trust and love.

You broke his walls down, like JJ would never have been able to. Sometimes she wasn't sure if she could stand the fact, she just knew she should.

Back then, all those years ago when Spencer had sat down next to her on the jet with the Red Skin's tickets in his hand and asked her to go, she was scared. She knew that now, had realized it when Spencer and Penelope had been abducted by Meadows and the Messiah, when Emily spoke with her in the restroom and JJ was going crazy with worry about her best friends. Before, it had never really clicked for her, that maybe that was why she had invited Penelope to come with them to the game. Because a little voice in the back of her head had been whispering to her telling her to run, to turn away from him. She was scared of what could be, of what others might say and think.

Scared of hurting Spencer.

Deep down, she knew even back then, that she wasn't right for him.

And then, a year later, she met Will and the more serious their relationship got, the more any feelings for Spencer became platonic in nature. And it was good the way it was: working with each other, being friends. Maybe even something like best friends. It was enough.

She was happy with Will. She loved Will. She couldn't imagine life without him. The what if's and could have been's about Spencer hadn't been on JJ's mind in a very, very long time. Never really gone if she had to be honest, but not at the forefront of her thoughts all the same.

And since being honest was the keyword for today, here in this jewellery store forced with a gun pointing at her and Spencer and the other hostage, a rapid back and forth that could spiral more out of control with every passing second, the Truth she had to admit today, could change everything she had in her life.

"Truth." JJ swallowed after she said it and bit on the insides of her cheeks. Stand strong, show no fear; that was what she repeated in her head again and again, trying to fight of the raging panic that kept rising up in her chest ever since the guy had fired a warning shot in Spencer's direction just a moment ago.

"I want you to say something, you're afraid to say", the Unsub spat through gritted teeth. Saliva was pooling at the corners of his lips and the hand he was holding the gun in was shaking uncontrollably, “That you'd never tell anybody. And you better make it good!” He didn't take a step closer, he only shifted his weight from one foot to the other, but with the way he accentuated every word he was screaming with a movement of his hand, she felt like he was coming closer. Like he was placing the barrel of the gun closer to her body with every twitch, until he'd be able to press it right onto her sternum. “'Cause if it's not, it's gonna be the last thing you ever say!”

Her nostrils flared as she took a slow breath in, trying to calm her nerves enough to find an answer and to give him the answer without a waver in her voice.

“What's it gonna be?” This time when he shifted his weight, he did take a small step closer to her.

By the way her nose was aching and her eyes were burning she knew it would only be a matter of moments until the tears would fall. She blinked to keep the tears away a bit longer and avoiding eye contact with the Unsub, only looking at him for a second. When she answered, she cursed herself for how shaky her voice was. “There are only four people it trust in this world.”

“Boring”, he commented in a weird sing-sang before he pointed the weapon down and shot the Judge in the leg. The gun was immediately pointed back at JJ. “Next!”

The gunshot had drowned out the whimper she hadn't been able to hold back. And when the deadly attention was back on her, she immediately went back in to position - stand strong, show no fear. The second part almost wasn't manageable any more for her. “Uhm”, she let out, again racking her brain for an answer, something the would finally accept. What could she say? What was she willing to say?

“My, uhm.” The pained whimpers of the woman in front of her as she slowly slid down the cabinet distracted her, she wasn't sure if she was welcoming the distraction or not. JJ felt bad for even remotely feeling thankful that the woman was in pain. “My baby, I lost, I um-”, she looked around, first meeting the Unsubs gaze, then at a random point at the wall and back to him. The emotions bubbling up in her almost choked her and she had to clear her throat. She didn't want to tell him this, but she had to. “- wanted to name her Maggie.”

“BULL!”, he screamed and JJ jumped. “Come on, you can do better than that!” Again, waving the gun, closer and closer.

Spencer tried to get his attention and pull it away from her, calling out the Unsub's name. “Casey...!”

Now the gun was pointed at Spencers head. “SHUT UP!” And again with the uncontrolled waving and twitching. JJ felt like she couldn't breathe.

She jumped again when Casey suddenly was right in front of her, forcefully grabbing into the hair at the back of her head, pushing her down to her knees with the tight grip and possibly even pulling some strands out. “Okay, okay..”, she mumbled, whimpered. What could she say?

“Last chance! Something you'd never say aloud. Not even to your partner here.” For a moment he waved his gun at Spencer again. “Your deepest, darkest secret. Impress me, or I'll kill him.”

It was the first thing that came to her mind when the Unsub demanded this, and threatened Spencer's life. It was the only thing that fought its way through the panic. The panic that had clouded her mind for anything else but the need for survival. Hers. Spencers.

She couldn't hold back her tears any more. In a desperate attempt to catch Spencer's gaze, she darted her eyes to his direction. At the same time the guilt that was already coming over her and trying to pull her down, before she even said one word and it made her look away from him.

“COME ON!”

So she said it. Hoping, it would be enough to save their lives. Hoping, her fear of losing her best friend would stay just that. A fear. Hoping, that they would walk out of here alive and that nothing would change between them. That even after saying what she was about to say, they could go on like before, that they would be okay. Selfish as it was, JJ couldn't lose him. She just didn't know who she was without Spencer in her life. Her best friend, her confidant. Her fi-... She knew she should know it, that it made no sense to feel like this. But she couldn't help needing him.

With a shy look on her face, she turned to her friend, took a deep breath.

"Spence, uhm,” she started, shooting him a pained smile to ease his nerves and her own. And he looked at her, waiting for her to continue, with a sad but still vary and concentrated shimmer in his eyes. He was sitting weidly stiff and there was ovment in his shoulders but she wasn't able to focus on anything else than his face.

Or not, because JJ had to look away. She didn't think she could say this while directly looking at him. This was just too...

“I've always loved you", she admits, helplessly shrugging her shoulder as she said it. You meant more to me than anyone I loved before you, before Will.

It took Spencer a moment to understand, what she is saying. How she meant those three words, that they had said a lot of times to each other over the years, in a platonic way.

His eyes slightly widened when the words sink in. The true meaning behind them.

“And I wasjusttooscaredtosay it before.” Her words came out in a blur, almost undistinguishable. She exhaled and looked away, shook the hair out of her face with a quick motion of her head. And as she tried to bite back her tears,she scoffed. “And now, things are just”, the sob leaving her throat almost sounded like a laugh, “far too complicated to say it now.” I am married and have kids, my kids are your godsons. You have a girlfriend, the love of your life waiting for you at home. These are the things she didn't say, didn't need to say. Didn't want to say in front of everyone else in the room.

Maybe she did laugh. The situation was so absurd, so surreal. It almost didn't feel real if there wouldn't be this gun pointed at her.

With tears running down her face she forced herself to look at Spencer. “I'm sorry”, she breathed out. “But you should know.” In case I die here. In case you die here. I had to let you know.

He didn't give away what he was thinking or feeling, had closed off the expressions on his face after the initial shock. The whisper of a sad smile stretched his lips as an acknowledgement when she stopped talking.

The giggle the Unsub let out, made the bile rise into JJ's throat.

“Hot damn”, he laughed, switching between looking at her and Spencer. “That's what I'm talking about.”

Neither of them looked up at the man standing over them, caught in a silent conversation. Did I just destroy everything? - Don't worry. At least that was what she hoped he was saying with his eyes.

“Now those are some last words right there.” Could this guy please, please, please just stop waving the god damn gun around!?

For the fracture of a second, everything fell from JJ's shoulders. The guilt, the sorrow, the fear. She did it, her confessions had been enough. Worthy of saving them. Just when the muscles in her body relaxed, the gun was pointed back right in to her face, mere inches away. “But not good enough to safe your life!” Spit landed on her face.

JJ readied herself, even with the immense fear shooting through her whole body so harsh her body felt numb. The hole of the barrel drew her eyes to it, hypnotized her. For some reason, she started a countdown in her head.

Three, two – BANG!

Casey's legs gave out and he grunted as his weapon fell out of his hand and he helds his stomach. Then, he collapsed, his dead-weight body falling into the space between her and Spencer. Her brain had problems catching up after already checking out, after making some kind of peace with her immediate death.

She looked from the dead body, to Spencer and the gun in his hand, too stunned to ask or think about how he had managed to free his hands and where the gun came from.

They didn't speak a word to each other after their team burst in, there neither had been the time nor a fitting occasion to talk. They didn't speak until some time later in the evening, after the team made it back, just in time to get cleaned up and celebrate David's & Krystall's marriage.

When they finally shared some words when they both headed to the bar to get something to drink, they didn't talk long.

JJ was nervous. A whole lot of new what if's regarding Spencer were now on her mind. What if he hates me now? What if he wants nothing to do with me any more? What if he leaves me? She hated herself for being so selfish when the last one crossed her mind. She had been prepared to take this secret with her to her grave. But she had needed to say some thing real, something that would not only get the Unsubs attention, but also Spencers. Only then could she have made sure to get a chance at getting them out of there. She was sorry for spilling her secret, for doing this to him and burdening him with it. But now it was out an she couldn't take it back.

“So I, uh, I didn't get a chance to... say it back there, but...”, she started before saying anything else about her confession, having to start the conversation at least somewhere. “Thank you... for saving my life.” She smiled at him.

“You're welcome.” He nodded his head, a small smile stretching in his lips as well. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” She laughed nervously. “So uh, Luke was right, two guns, huh? Since when have you been wearing an ankle holster?”

“Around the time I got out of prison”, Spencer smirked.

“Right.” JJ nodded, then quickly looked away, internally working herself up to get the next words out, the ones she so desperately wanted to ask him. “Look, uh, I... Are- are we, okay?” That was all she could hope for at this point. It was all she wanted. That they were okay.

He smiled at her reassuringly and nodded. “Of course.” His smile and the soft tone his voice held eased her nerves instantly.

She held back a sigh of relief and smiled. “Good.”

They fell silent as they wait, Spencer for his water and JJ for a glass of wine. She softly drummed the tips of her finger on the wood, before she turned around to find where you were standing. When your name fell from her lips Spencers eyes darted to you, not even having to search the room. Like a magnetic pull, something that just came natural to him, knowing where to find you. “She looks beautiful tonight.”

Spencer silently nods as his eyes roam your body, how the fabric of your outfit hugged itself around you. “Yeah”, he breathes out, almost inaudibly. “She is.”

The glass clinking as the drinks were served caught her attention and she turned to take hers into her hand. With her free hand she touched Spencers arm and squeezed lightly. Their gazes met and they shared a smile before she walked away.

Just when JJ got back to the table the music changed into a soft and slow tune. Will took the glass form her hand and pulled her away to dance with her. Happy, she leaned into him, and enjoyed the moment. Enjoyed being in his arms.

She couldn't help but look as Spencer and you found your way to other side of the dance floor. He pulled you so close to him, not even a sheet of paper would have had space between the both of you. He was smiling down at you as you were slowly swaying to the rhythm of the music together and you were smiling up at him just as bright. Lost in each others eyes. Every so often he would lift your intertwined hands from his chest up to plant a kiss to your knuckles, or he would brush the tip of his nose against yours before he stole a quick kiss from your lips. Not for one second losing the bright smile, that all but screamed that he was drunk on love.

Spencer was JJ's first love, and the first love is something special, something you can't just erase out of your heart as if it never had made it's home in there in the first place. He was a big piece of her heart and would always be. But she had never even dared to try and stand where you were standing now. By his side; as his partner, his equal. His other half. His forever.

Even if she wouldn't have Will and her two beautiful boys - and don't get me wrong, she wouldn't trade her life with her family for the world-, the way the two of you were clinging to each other right now, looking like you were deeply sunken into your own little universe where no one else existed; and so full of bliss and love for each other... There was no way she would destroy this, no way she would break you two apart.

There was nothing in the world that could break Spencer and you apart.

JJ couldn't hear what you were whispering about, she could only guess by the way you looked at each other and giggled occasionally. The longer you danced it seemed like you were melting into each other, merging your bodies and souls together to form one.

Emily's speech from earlier ringed in her ears then. Penelope says, that this was fate. That [their marriage] was in the stars. [They] are twin flames. Two souls, that are always meant to be together. […] The thing about twin flames is, that nothing can keep them apart.

It was similar to something she had heard Spencer himself say once: "There's an old Buddhist saying, that, when you meet your soulmate, […] the act to bring you together was 500 years in the making." She thought both descriptions were fitting for what you and Spencer had.

As she let her eyes linger on your swaying forms, she suddenly felt like she was intruding something personal and intimate, so she averted her gaze and turned her head away. She rested her cheek against her husbands chest as she faced the other way and closed her eyes. JJ hugged Will closer and as his own hold on her tightened he rested his chin on the crown of her head.

It wasn't fair that she loved Spencer. Because she loved Will and her two boys too. Her family had made her who she was. But so had Spencer.

It wasn't fair to anyone involved.

She had never meant to hurt him, never. She just wanted him to be happy. And you made him happy.

No matter who much she loves Spencer now, had loved him before and would continue to love him, she could never love him as much as you did; the woman who stood where JJ never even had dared to stand.,

[hon3yteddy]

꒰ nct dream + intimate moments i want to experience 🍞 ꒱

synopsis: tbh idk but there thing i'd generally kill to experience (this is not a joke), and add some arson too if i get to do them with dream genre(s): established relationship, romance, tooth rotting fluff warning(s): mix use of tenses, severe symptoms of delusions and signs of parasocial relationship, not reread at all !!! author's note: hanging out with newjeans at the psych ward

#𝟎𝟐𝟎𝟖 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐋𝐄𝐄 . . .

― kind of cliché a cheesy... but slow dancing! mark's one of us - a hopeless romantic so he'd definitely be a sucker for a slow dance under the dim lights of your shared apartment. he'd perfectly time his movements after instantly recognising your favourite slow song (i recommend any song by laufey) drift from the kitchen as you prepare your dinner for the evening. he's heard the song too many times to count but mark never minded. he loved that about you - the little things, the big things, and everything in between.

just before the chorus, he'd slip behind you, guiding your hands with his own to carefully drop whatever you were holding, and clumsily twirl you round to face him. i can feel it in my bones that the man would do those knew weakening, borderline giggle, chuckle of his and gently pull your hand for a light kiss against the skin of your knuckles. you would find yourself resting one hand on his shoulder and the other being embraced tightly by his. mark always loves how close you feel when you're like this.

he would give you that look, the look you've seen a hundred times. it's the same one he gave you before he kissed you for the first time, the same one he wore when he finally got the guts to ask you on a date, that look so beautiful and real that your too much in a daze to notice him slip an arm around your waist. together you slowly sway to the beat of the song, forgetting the past and ignoring the future.

he holds you close, maybe too close even. yet none of that mattered. all that did was the way he was whisking you across the room, embracing you tight. feathered kisses, words of worship, lovesick eyes - truly a night to remember.

♡: mark, the foods going to burn... mk: guess so. but i'll eat anything made by you, burnt or not. ♡: the food is definitely burning right now!

#𝟐𝟑𝟎𝟑 𝐇𝐔𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐉𝐔𝐍 . . .

― renjun is a true artist and what is one of the most popular forms of art? paintings. he adores painting you, a truly enjoyable pastime. countless of times would you catch him sketching you, entrapping every detail of your soul onto a canvas or simply just the ripped page of a battered notebook. you have always been curious about his hobby so every now and then you'd have the honour of spending the hour painting with renjun.

there's something so dear about painting with someone you love. maybe it's the serenity, or the way the soul becomes so vulnerable yet so free on the canvas. whatever it was, things always felt so different when it would be the two of you.

evenings were always the time for such dates and soon enough the both of you would have long ago abandoned the canvases. it all had started when you had gotten frustrated with your piece of the day, for it could never compare to renjun's. so frustration took over, and you had painted a sad face on side of his face so very careful to not poke him in the eye. your shaky attempt at frown reminded you of the earlier days where it was socially acceptable to paint on one’s face and so you didn’t stop.

you enjoyed it and he could tell as he too abandoned his own piece to paint on you. the way he carefully held your giggling bod still and swirled his brush against your exposed skin from the blush of your cheeks, to the dent of your collarbones. you always found renjun prettier when he was focused and now he was focused on every part of you, adorning you with works of his own. yet none of his paintings could ever compete with the beauty of you. 

♡: you always make me look so beautiful, renjun. rj: you just simply are, that's all.

#𝟐𝟑𝟎𝟒 𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐉𝐄𝐍𝐎 . . .

― jeno is a man sent from the heavens, carved by zeus himself and blesses the undeserving earth with his presence. basically, he's a sweet man with big, beefy arms you kinda just want to chomp and snuggle against. (the indescribable things i'd do to be embraced by the lee jeno can not be said aloud.)

cuddling is a simplistic show of affection and jeno must be the best person to hug in the whole world. a true safe place in this cruel world where you can finally let yourself be vulnerable and receive the love you oh so needed.

jeno loves hugging you. if it's after work, after a hard day, on the sofa, out of the blue, the man would be at your beck and cal. sometimes you didn't need to ask. he'd would be right there each and every time and he would love every hug he got to share with you. the thought of simply hugging you is everything to this lovesick puppy.

the hugs he loves the most are the ones you just needed the most. the ones where there was no need for an exchange of words or questioning eyes, just open arms. there was no other soul on this very earth who could make you feel so loved yet so weak in his arms that you could swear you could break, and sometimes you did. but he was there, and that's all you needed.

there's something so intense between each hug - tight embraces, soft hums, tender kisses, and the alignment of both your hearts. with each hug, jeno told you he loved you without the need for a single word.

jn: … (i love you) ♡: … (i love you too)

#𝟎𝟔𝟎𝟔 𝐋𝐄𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐍 . . .

― now it's no surprise to us when i say haechan adores physical touch. he honestly invented the love language itself. so of course, the dude is very much in love with you and the act of kissing you. every chance he got, he kissed you every time. but if there was one thing haechan loves more than kissing you, it's you kissing him.

imagine just kissing every inch of this man who deserves all the love in the world! he loves it when you kiss his moles with whispered words of praise in between. he never lets you miss one and always points out one just to get another kiss.

he's a giggling mess and you are too. hiding underneath the bed covers, tracing your hands against his bare skin, enjoying the way he writhes in anticipation for your next kiss. it's a game you both enjoy too much.

don't worry, you always get your fair share of kisses. he loves kissing the details of your skin and he loves even more the reaction he earns with each one (cocky dude). there isn't a single part of you he dislikes. oh, and if you too are blessed with moles of your own, he'll find each and every one to give a tickling kiss. sometimes he'll call them stars, sometimes its the cute dots of ladybugs - every single blemish, scar and mole would be loved, for haechan is just utterly in love with your very being down to the last detail.

hc: you know moles are where your lover kissed you in your past life? ♡: really? you must have given me these then. hc: and in your next life, you’ll have so many more for me to kiss…

#𝟏𝟑𝟎𝟖 𝐍𝐀 𝐉𝐀𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍 . . .

― bubble baths. i can't explain it easily, but there's something so romantic about bubble baths. jaemin isn't necessarily joining you, but if wants to, he can hop in my imagine bath tub. he's actually the one preparing them for you. he'll always want his lover to feel a tease, he could never let you drown yourself in stress.

every now and then he would prepare the perfect bubble bath, filling the tub with hot water, scented ointments, expensive soap and even a dash of petals. you can tell he enjoys doing it too as he'll usually greeted by the man himself at the door, wearing the proudest smile. he doesn't hesitate in sweeping you off your feet, always nagging for you to relax while he takes care of everything else.

he always prepares a lot, paying attention to every detail he knows you'll love. your favourite song plays, a calming scent drift from the candles he's lit, there'll always be a glass of your favourite drink by your side and your favourite pjs hang against the door for you to slip in after.

as you lay in the bath, wading your hands against the water that’s just right, you sometimes feel shy under jaemin’s attentive and kind gaze. You may even complain about it all being too much but he’s quick to hush you with a kiss. jaemin just wants you to enjoy the serenity every now and then, he can’t handle seeing the one he loves struggling. he enjoys spoiling you and he loves seeing your tense body finally give up and melt. this week he’ll read you a book as he sits beside the bathtub, not caring if you splash a little water onto him. the next he’ll let you enjoy a movie, and the one after, he’ll bring you a meal for you to enjoy whether that be a fast food burger or home cooked pasta. chivalry could never be dead with jaemin around.

jm: it's time you to take a break! ♡: you already did this for me like last week! jm: it's not illegal for you to take regular breaks, okay?

#𝟐𝟐𝟏𝟏 𝐙𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐆 𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐍𝐋𝐄 . . .

― you know that genre of romance scenes where the main couple help the other put on a necklace, fix a tie, button up their shirt, brush their hair etc, that - all of that. the simplicity of getting ready with a lover is so dreamy and chenle is indeed the man of everyone's dream.

the intensity shared between the two of you is unmatched. the bliss silence, hesitant touches, enchanted eye contact... gosh i'm blushing. when he stands behind you, letting his fingers graze the back of your neck to clasp the new necklace he's bought you. a compliment leaves his lips to touch upon the shell of your ear. he never dares to hide from your watchful eyes in the reflection and neither do you.

chenle lets his fingers glide down you bare back to zip the material of your outfit together. he holds you still while his hand painstakingly slowly moves up your spine for him to stop with a soft “all done”, enamoured by you and only you. and when he places you in front of the vanity mirror, threading his fingers through your hair, taking his time in watching, no, worshipping your very being in a blissful silence

the tension would almost be too much to bear. the way he gazes down at you while your busy fixing the tie he has clearly messed up on purpose. he always catches himself enjoying it all too much. something about the close proximity, focused eyes and building tension that's got his knees on the verge of buckling. just every moment chenlesees you, he swears he's fallen in love with you all over again.

cl: so b- ♡: you're going to call me beautiful again, aren't you?

#𝟎𝟓𝟎𝟐 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐉𝐈𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆 . . .

― now me and mr park jisung don't have a lot in common, but we do share the epitome of being awkward (he just pulls it off better than me. so it's fair to say that hand holding would get jisung weak in the knees. he's just a tall grown man with the soul of a little child and who's hopelessly in love with you.

and i must say, jisung has got the prettiest hands i've ever seen, no wonder you can't hold yourself back from slipping your hands into his. it makes him jump every time but he'd hold hands with you forever if he could.

it begins with the two of you walking side by side and a noticeable brush of hands. then a classic pinkie lock comes into play and jisung is in a mess already. and finally you'll intertwine your fingers with his once again. it's shock to his poor heart every time it occurs. he'd never let his eyes meet your face, he's far to weak to look at your beautiful face. he would simply falter and break under your loving gaze.

hand holding is a timeless classic move that is every loner's dream. does jisung wish he could experience the sensation of holding hands with you for the first time? very much so!

♡: you're adorable, jisung. js: … (internal monologue about how much he's in love with you)

january 2023 © hon3yteddy

[zerobaseonefics]

reactions to the lipstick trend (pt.1) ㅡ jeonghyeon, s.hanbin, taerae (requested)

boys planet trainees x gn!reader

genre : fluff, maybe a bit suggestive for jeonghyeon but nothing really happens tbh

note : there was supposed to be six boys for this one 😭 but it was just soooo long so i'll make a part two with kamden, junhyeon and i'm still hesitating on the last one! should be coming soon. thank you guys once again for the 200 followers <3

• Sung Hanbin

one thing about hanbin, he is a simp. he didn't know if it was something in his nature or you were the cause of this new feature, but he knew he was. he would see you in all the little things : stray cats, the reflexion of the sun on his phone screen, sweet love songs, the scent of your favorite flavor when he was making drinks at his mother's cafe, the lovers he would see on the street...

that's why when he saw that trend on tiktok, he couldn't help imagining himself doing it with you. he hesitated for a while before asking, one day where you where laying on his chest at his place. hanbin was scrolling on his for you page while you were slowly dozing off on him. suddenly, one of the videos of the trend came up. he looked at you, before telling himself it was destiny if it came up when you were here.

"babe" he softly called, checking if you were awake. you simply looked at him and he gave you his phone for you to see the video. watching your reaction, he secretly hoped you would find it cute as well. when the tiktok ended, your eyes suspiciously darted to him, examining his face to understand his motivations.

"i'm not doing this with you" you simply said before giving him back his phone.

"how did you know?" exclaimed hanbin.

"i just know you."

despite the fact his heart fluttered at the thought of you knowing him so well, hanbin pouted.

"why wouldn't we? it's cute!"

"because that means i have to get up and put on lipstick and look good and i'm too lazy for this."

"you always look good though..."

"don't try to rizz me up??"

hanbin didn't want to force you in anything, so he simply accepted your choice. however, you could clearly see that he was upset. you looked up to him, still laying on his chest, before sighing and rolling next to him.

"bring the lipstick color you want and let's do this."

you saw his face lit up as he got up immediatly to go and grab the color he wanted. he didn't take long, so you thought he just took a random one... in fact, he just decided what color he wanted beforehand..

you sat on the bed and gestured him to do the same. he did, his back against the headboard. you couldn't stop yourself from smiling seeing how happy he looked, and you sat closer to him. hanbin insisted on applying the lipstick for you, the action flustering you a bit. after that, he rearranged your hair with his hand, telling you more than once that you looked beautiful.

after that, it was your turn to play the part and kiss him. you looked at him as his eyes were also on you, an excited expression on his angelic face. you didn't know where to kiss first, so you went to kiss both of his cheeks, making him smile wider. little by little, hanbin's face was covered by all the lipstick marks you applied with your pecks.

"it should be enough."

"i want neck kisses too." he mumbled, holding your hand to coax you. your felt your face warming up but you still gently leaned down to grant his wish as he looked like the happiest man on earth. safe to say you made his day, his week, his month even, and he watches the video you made daily with a dumb smile on the face.

• jeonghyeon

jeonghyeon always tried his best to seem like a cool guy, never losing his temper, never flustered by anything. sometimes, it pissed you off a little, because you would do everything to make him shy in vain. jeonghyeon would even counter the attacks and you were always the one ending up blushing as he laughed. he didn't mean jeonghyeon was unfazed by your action, far from it, he was just good at hiding. he'd keep his cool in front of you until he's home alone kicking his feet and giggling like a middle schooler.

after all, God sends his hardest battles to his strongest soldiers. and jeonghyeon always proved himself to be deserving of the title of strongest soldier. that is until the day you came to him with your stupid tiktok trend, your stupid lipstick, your stupid pretty face and your stupid smile. sitting on the couch of your apartment, he found himself taken aback by your request. he knew he was down for the second you asked him to do it. could he say no? yes, he could. but could he stand your disappointment afterwards and the fact that you'll lose that smile? no, he couldn't. plus, it was a win-win situation, and i'm not talking about the boy from wayv, i'm talking about him having the honor to have his face peppered of your kisses.

he swore someone was praying on his downfall when you just sat on his lap, both of your legs straddling his. he did his best to look calm when your hands softly grabbed his face. your lips first met the corner of his, leaving a pretty mark on the spot. don't lose the battle, jeonghyeon! fight back! do something to make them flustered! but at the moment, jeonghyeon's brain was broken, he had no idea what to do. he wanted to put his hands on your waist in attempt to make you shy, but he failed when your lips touched him a second time, leaving him to squeeze the back of your shirt in defeat.

suddenly, still sitting on him, you leaned back to observe his face. he looked at you, confused.

"what?" he asked.

"your cheeks are red and it's definitly not the lipstick..."

"what?" jeonghyeon repeated. "no! they are not, it's... all in your head."

"are you gaslighting me to make sure i don't see you're blushing?" you asked.

"what?" jeonghyeon said for third time before mentally slapping himself. "look, do your things quickly okay? you like it too much you're starting to have hallucinations."

you didn't reply, simply leaning back to his face. you stopped when yours lips were almost touching his, and he could now feel that you were not lying : he was blushing. his panicked eyes went to your colored lips and now he has a new problem. jeonghyeon couldn't think about something else, he wanted to kiss you so bad. he didn't care anymore that you knew he was down bad.

he squeezed your shirt tighter, this time to have your attention.

"do you want something?" you asked him in a teasing tone.

"can you kiss me there?" his voice quieter than usual as he pointed his lips with his finger. as he saw the smirk on your face, he knew you will not give him what he wanted easily. "please", he added.

"you look so cute, blushing like this. isn't it the first time I saw this look on you? i was starting to feel like i had no effect on you" you said, a fake pout on your face.

"you got no idea about the power you have on me."

at first, you wanted to tease him a bit more, but you were as affected by the situation as him. plus, it was the first time you saw him seem that desperate for you, or for anything else. you decided to press your lips on his and he instantly responded to your kiss. the grip he had on your shirt finally loosened as he find the courage to put his hands on your waist, pulling you closer to his body.

at the end of the day, maybe the person who prayed for jeonghyeon's downfall did the right thing, and the tiktok you were planning to do was soon forgotten after the heated make out that happened.

• taerae

"you....wanna... do that...??"

ladies, gentlemen, and non-binaries, today i'm introducing you to kim taerae, the man with no bitches. he would always tell you the contrary, but you knew him since forever, and you knew he was lying : he never dated someone before you. all these things couples do, it was just so new to him. he didn't really care about love before meeting you. taerae wasn't popular before, and it just never crossed his mind to have a partner before meeting you.

taerae would always be willing to do whatever you want to do with him. and he would always love it. so when you asked him to do the trend with you, despite his obvious pinkness, he said yes right away. he observed you as you applied the elegant color on your lips, admiring how good you looked. when you sat in front of him, you went closer to his face to leave a soft peck on his forehead.

despite being positive to all your requests, taerae always had some.... interesting reactions. in fact, he would freak out each time. that famous smile of his immediatly made its appearance on his face once you gave him the first kiss. it didn't stop growing when you kissed him a second time on the cheek. and it was enough for taerae to go crazy.

"stop! wait. let me get it together." taerae said, his hand gesturing you to stop. you looked at him while he tried to regain his composure. you gently smiled when you realized the effect you had on him.

"okay, i'm ready. do it again."

however, when you got back to it, taerae wasn't able to keep his cool. in fact, the boy would ask for a break every two kisses because he just couldn't stand how fast his heart was racing. no cuz jeonghyeon would wait home to cry about how much he loved you but taerae he's deadass kicking his feet and shii in front of you 💀

at the end, you ended up never filming this damn video because he just made it so hard. as much as your kisses where doing things to him, his loser-like attitude did the same to you. you two ended up cuddling with his gace still lipstick-stained. and don't think you're going anywhere because you're going to be trapped in his arms for hours now.

[the-cookie-of-doom]

Hiii

I remember when you were posting about your Kim/Wik Twins AU and I was so hooked! There’s so much potential for angst in this AU😩🤌 I always wondered if there was anything new going on with this WIP.

PS: I’ve been following your blog for a little while (I don’t interact bc im shyy) and I love all your Kimchay WIPS and little excerpts you’ve blessed us with (they make my day everytime I see one). So I want to personally thank your brain for all these wonderful ideas and just thank you for being you 😊

send me an ask and I'll tell you about one of these WIPs!

Oh anon, you're a darling! This was so nice to wake up to <3 I actually haven't worked much on that AU since originally posting it, but you're right, there is so much angst potential in this AU between Wik and Kim. One of the inspirations from it actually came from World of Warcraft, and how the character Varian was split into two people, the other one being Lo'Gosh. I really loved how it wasn't just "this is the good side vs. the bad/feral side." Varian was polite and charming and good at socializing, but he was also vain and easy to manipulate (which was the point of splitting him), whereas Lo'Gosh was definitely a barbarian, but he was also all of Varian's strong will and ambition/motivation, and passion. I hadn't seen that kind of character splitting before, because it's usually an easy shorthand for doing a good/evil thing.

So for the purposes of this fic, Kim isn't just all the evil mafia while Wik is the sweetheart singer. Wik is very driven and tbh a little selfish, he's kind to his fans but ultimately very cold, because he grew up in a world where anything he cared about could be used against him. Both of them are still calculating in clever, but it's Wik that begins investigating Chay, intentionally using his stardom as an in, and purposefully manipulating him to get more information. He takes it to a stronger degree than we actually see from Kim in the show.

Whereas Kim is the quieter, more contained side. They both love music but Kim prefers guitar/piano over singing because he doesn't want to draw attention to himself the way Wik does, although he does write a lot of poetry/lyrics. One of the betrayals from Wik leaving is that he stole Kim's songs. The other is that he left Kim behind. He loves his brother more than anything, and Wik leaving him without so much as a goodbye was devastating for him.

Here's your slightly less than 500 words!

“You left me!” “Would you have even come with me?” Kim’s voice breaks on a desperate, “Yes!” He wants to take it back as soon as the word leaves his mouth, too honest in the heat of his moment, chest heaving with the weight of it. The only good thing about the admission is that his brother is too stunned to reply; Kim takes satisfaction in that, in the implication of it, as Wik realizes the depth of his own selfishness.  “Kim…” “I would…” Kim swallows. Days of captivity have left his throat dry. It hurts, speaking these words aloud, tearing them out of his chest to release them after all these years. “I would have. If you asked me to, I would have.”  He would have followed his brother anywhere. They were always meant to be together. Kim and Wik, two halves of the same whole, mirror images down to their names. Until Wik decided he couldn’t bear his own reflection anymore.  “Kim, I’m sorry, I didn’t know—” “How could you? You only ever think about yourself.” Kim laughs. It’s wet. It hurts, like everything else about this damned conversation. Maybe Wik was right; they were better off alone. “I thought you knew me better than anyone, but you don’t know me at all.” Maybe Wik never did. What a horrible time to realize how truly alone he really is.  Wik doesn’t speak for a long time. Neither does Kim, keeping his head bowed and his breaths measured, cracked ribs aching with every rise and fall of his chest. What a cruel joke that the first time they’re sharing a space in years, something Kim has longed for since the day Wik left, and it’s only because someone else has forced them together.  “I don’t think you would ever leave the family,” Wik eventually says, his voice quieter than Kim has ever heard it. “You’re not like me, Kim, you never wanted to leave.” Of course he didn’t. Why would Kim ever want to leave his brothers? But at least if he had, Kinn and Tankhun would have had each other. They wouldn’t have been alone, not like Wik is now. Not like Kim is, forever missing his other half. Neither of them were meant to be alone. "It doesn't matter anymore." "Yes it does. Kim. I never meant to hurt you. I—" But there's no more time to talk because their captors are walking in, and Wik is throwing himself in front of Kim, both of them bound and unable to put of any kind of fight. Not that it would have mattered; Wik already got himself kidnapped. Too nosy to stay out of the family completely, but apparently the idealistic fool didn't bother to keep up with his martial arts. Still. Despite blaming him for the current predicament, Kim is a little bit touched that Wik is trying to protect him now. Too late to matter, maybe, but it's something.

[slexenskee]

What are the heroes opinions on No Scrubs music? And are there certain songs that some of the pros empathize more with?

Been pretty curious about this since Erasure and the Detective talked about how there are plenty of off duty pro's in the crowd of a No Scrubs concert.

Ahaha should I just go down the list? Tbh idk if I'll ever get to most of these reactions so it's a good thing this was asked haha

Echo: Biggest stan. He can do no wrong. She was shocked to hear he's Dabi, but also loves the more chaotic No Scrubs songs (I Write Sins not Tragedies, But it's Better if you Do, Jesus of Suburbia etc) and is like, nahh that checks out. Her favorite album is "Good News for People Who Love Bad News".

All Might: listens to them during his hospital stay bc Naomasa recommended it to him (the troll lol). He loves them on first listen, bc he really digs american alternative music and is shocked he's only first hearing them now. His favorite album is Death Before Decaf by a landslide. He worries about his Satoru-shounen, bc some of these songs deal with a lot of trauma. Also is like... wait a minute Semi-Charmed Life is my favorite song and why is it about crystal-meth??? Satoru-shounen?!

Eraserhead: thinks "... this guy has a lot of songs about women, for a guy who historically has never slept with a single woman." His favorite songs are 'This Ain't a Scene it's an arms race' and 'Sugar we're going down', bc he appreciates the irony of some of the lyrics

Present Mic: loveesss the vibe of Glass Onion Heart, as he's a pop-fan. He was really surprised to find Ru-kun and Dabi are the same person, but he respects the hell out of Ru-kun and adores his music and has also mad respect for Dabi after he saved the kiddos on multiple occasions, so he's a major stan. His favorite song is Tokyo, or Moving to New York, bc they both have that 'electropop sound'

Midnight: Her favorite song is Misery Business, or Thanks for the Memories. She's more of a peripheral fan than Present Mic, but she enjoys their music. She adores Dabi/Ru-kun's 'aesthetic'.

Endeavor: doesn't know how to feel. Is very overwhelmed. Somehow he could handle watching his son blow up a terrorist cult on live TV but has heart palpitations watching him perform in a wig and a Sailor Moon outfit. there's too many songs for him to parse out. He tries the acoustic album first because it seems less overwhelming, and it just makes him kind of sad. And full of regret in a way. His son is so talented and Endeavor had always been so full of himself that he'd never realized. His favorite song is No Such Thing - he identifies with it a lot and lowkey hates himself for it bc he 'realizes' how similar he and Touya must be to go through similar circumstances. He also really likes Notion from the same album. He hasn't managed to branch out to the other albums, but he always listens when the songs are on the radio. He only really dislikes hearing Say It Aint So, for obvious reasons, even though the whole alcoholism and step-father thing confuse the hell out of him.

Tensei: Obviously has a soft spot for the acoustic album he bullied ru-kun into making, but his favorite is Good News for People Who Love Bad News, bc that's the album he first found them through and he feels nostalgic about it, but he absolutely adores all the songs/subliminal messages of Death Before Decaf. I'm Not Okay is his favorite song, although it's a tough call. He obviously was the first hero to find out Ru-kun and Dabi are the same person, and he's also lowkey moonlighting as an online forum warrior defending Dabi to his dying breath lol. He'll be very embarrassed if anyone finds out his screen name.

Best Jeanist: Not his kind of music, but he digs the ✨aesthetic✨ and is obsessed with some of Ru-kuns more performative outfits, even the ones that aren't jeans. He's actually a lowkey fan of Mitsuya's designs (but doesn't know his real identity) and can spot one from a mile off. He would absolutely slink up to Dabi at a random event and ask him where he bought his jeans.

Miruko: Also not her kind of music, but once the 'SixWings' stuff drops she's curious enough to give it a listen. She likes Glass Onion Heart the most bc of its more pop sound. She definitely just wanted to be nosey and see if any of the songs were blatantly about Hawks, but is a little confused to see most of them seem to be about women.

Edgeshot: Actually digs their latest album Infinity On High. Has a soft spot for the Green Day songs, Jesus of Suburbia, Holiday, and Hitchin' a Ride - although he's emphatically not an anti-establishment rebel like those songs would suggest lol.

Kamui Woods: Lowkey another major stan that keeps it lowkey like Tensei. Also has a gay crisis over Ru-kun. 1979 is his favorite song. He's unknowingly a Smashing Pumpkins fan, so he likes Today, Cherub Rock, 1979 and Mayonaise.

Hawks: I mean we'll def get his reaction in the fic but yes he's a fan, once he starts listening to it. His favorite is Mayonaise... for what will be obvious reasons... and also Island in the Sun for similar reasons lol. Outside of those he's actually similar to Endeavor (which he doesn't know how to feel about lol) in that the acoustic album is his favorite and specifically No Such Thing and Notion. Although when he turns 23 he changes his ringtone to What's My Age Again.

Not really heroes but do the students count??

Jirou: Favorite song is Misery Business, but her favorite album is Thanks I Hate it Here. She's a massive fan of all their songs, but with her keen ear for music she's especially fond of the really great riffs in Death Before Decaf. Her second favorite would be Smells Like Teen Spirit.

Katsuki: His favorite song to play is Reinventing The Wheel to Run Myself Over, + he likes that song in general bc he just identifies with it lol. He also really likes Homesick at Space Camp, again becuase it's just a fun song to play on the drums. Most repeated No Scrubs song on his spotify is actually My Heart Is The Worst Kind of Weapon from Ru-kun's acoustic album... bc he's a massive simp and is absolutely obsessed with ru-kun's voice. Like he'd buy random super racy bodice-ripper audiobooks narrated in a language he barely understands just because Ru-kun was narrating them.

Hagakure: Immediately downloads all the albums after the news breaks bc she stans Dabi and omgggg he's a sexy rockstar on top of that?! Yeah she's a bandwagonner and she'll fight you about it. She really loves the fun, teenage-rebellion type songs - What's My Age Again is a personal favorite, even though she's not 23 lol. She also likes Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner, a Little Less Sixteen Candles, and Sugar We're Going Down.

Ashido: Fellow bandwagonner who stans Dabi and now stans Ru-kun. She and Hagakure absolutely nerd out and giggle in their rooms listening to their favorite villain/artist, and Jirou sometimes joins them. Yui finds the whole thing embarrassing and pretends she doesn't notice them. She's also obsessed with the acoustic album (thank you Tensei lol) bc she daydreams of Ru-kun one day serenading her with his guitar. She likes the classic Fall Out Boy From Under the Cork Tree teenage-romance-angst-drama songs, Nobody Puts Baby in a Corner, a Little Less Sixteen Candles, Sugar We're Going Down + Thanks for the Memories and This Ain't a Scene from FOB's Infinity on High.

Uraraka: feels like she has to get into it bc all the 1-A girls are into it now. She's too embarrassed to ask Yui about it directly the way Ashido and Hagakure sometimes do (Yui usually just hedges the questions off) but she always listens to the girl's answers whenever they do. Her favorites are Dance, Dance and Tokyo.

Tamaki: had totally been a fan before realizing Ru-kun and Dabi were the same person, had the usual gay crisis about it, was mortified to realize he'd made such a terrible first impression on one of his favorite artists and goes on to sulk in a corner for a lil bit but gets over it. His favorite song is My Own Worst Enemy, just loves the all around vibe. He also really likes Jesus of Suburbia and Smells Like Teen Spirit.

Mirio: Had heard of them bc of Tamaki, but had never gave them a real listen until after the news dropped. He likes a classic rock sound so his favorites are ones like Cherub Rock, In One Ear, and the assorted Green Day songs. He also loves Dance Floor Anthem though, just because it's such a fun song.

Nejire: Same as Mirio, it's not really her usual bubble-pop so she's heard of them through Tamaki but otherwise has never really listened to them. Accordingly she likes the acoustic album (omggg Ru-kun's voice is so sexy ~) and Glass Onion Heart's more pop-ish songs like Dance Floor Anthem, Dance, Dance and Tokyo.

The general consensus is very "???" and also "man this guy has been through some shit and has some bad vices about it but damn does he have a great voice" and frankly, take one look at him and think he lives a very appropriate rockstar-esque life lol. Ru-kun has definitely given everyone the impression that he drinks/does drugs/sleeps around with a hell of a lot more women than he actually does (or in the case of drugs and women, does at all).

[equallyshaw]

So I lay in your arms and pretend that it's love | trevor zegras.

based off olivia rodrigo's song- scared of my guitar!

trevor x singer nameless oc!

not too sure if i wanna do gif's or pictures like that above..trying something new out (:

word count: 2.3k+

warnings: tbh, she's toxic...pls dont be like her.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

◦

Perfect, easy, so good to me So why's there a pit in my gut in the shape of you? Distract myself, say it's somethin' else Maybe I'm just overwhelmed, maybe I'm confused

◦

for around 11 months it was pure bliss...the two of them everywhere and anywhere. onlookers looked on with smiles and hushed whispers about how 'in love' they were. the two of them moved quickly in their relationship, but nobody found anything weird with it based on how their friends watched them and how they spoke about one another in the media when asked. trevor loved bringing home flowers whenever he came back from a roadie, or just because he felt like it. he showered her with gifts from the get-go as her own life was beginning to fill with riches, as her music career took off.

but once the 1 year mark was coming closer and closer, she began to feel a sense of dread. a sense of anxiety and fear, she hadn't had before. whenever she heard his name in passing or whenever somebody asked her about him, she'd freeze and stutter; not sure what to exactly say. or what was weirder, was that she spent more and more time at her apartment in la and not at his newport house...claiming that the record label was hounding her for an album and she was working day and night, like a dog. she did whatever she could in order to not think about him may it be hanging with friends, driving up and down the coast to san diego to visit family and taking spur of the moment trips with her friends. and when people asked her what was wrong or what she was thinking about, she'd always say 'work' and every white lie that came with that topic.

but when she see's trevor sporadically, she understands why she fell in love with him in the first place. he's charming, relentlessly nerdy, incredibly kind and respectful; all of which she adores. and while basking in that feeling for a bit of time, she feels guilty about how her feelings change when she's not with him. she then chalks it up to work, and how much pressure the label is giving her. so maybe just maybe, she'll stick it out with trevor.

◦

Barely sleep when you sleep next to me

But I keep thinkin' I'll find a cure

I say that I'm fine, I tell you all the time

I've never felt so happy and sure

◦

shortly after their one year, as she stays with trevor about once or twice a week, she can't help but toss and turn all night. claiming she's just stressed and overly exhausted, and he buys it all. he buys all her, "I've never been happier" or "I've never felt so sure about something in my entire life". he buys the, "once im done with the album ill move in with you." too, yet she knows they wont last. that sickening and dreadful feeling that keeps her up at night.

she goes to all of these lengths just to keep her heart from collapsing and her conscious from crumbling above her, and yet she knows right from wrong. she know's that the one that would be hurt the most is him.

◦

But I'm so scared of my guitar'

Cause it cuts right through to the heart

Yeah, it knows me too well so I got no excuse

I can't lie to it the same way that I lie to you

◦

but then when she sits down to write and come up with the chords for a song, she cant help but cry. everything becoming too much for her, her closest friends and producer seeing right through her. her music speaking the words, she can't help but think but not say. she knows that if she lies in a song, she'd be betraying her heart and her soul. her music being her lifelong love and escape, would truly affect her relationship with it.

◦

So I lay in your arms and pretend that it's love

◦

around a year and five months, she stopped writing. she stopped playing her guitar until the early morning hours. she stopped recording, citing that she was dealing with some personal issue. once the acknowledgment of 'oh shit, i need to break things off- soon' hit her mind one day during a writing session, she knew she couldn't write or sing until she did just that. and so she made her way down the coast to newport to do just that, but when she walked inside she saw a doe-eyed and blissful trevor in her midst. she crumbled right then and there, allowing him to make their way to the bedroom. she laid in his arms, not being able to fall asleep once again; and reminding herself that she loved trevor .. or at least needed to remind herself more. was it though? at least on her part?

◦

I was ravin', no boy like you I had the nerve to just stop stringin' you all along But I'm not half as decent as you I'd rather be tied to someone, even if they're wrong

◦

trevor was the guy, she thought when they first met. she thought that they were end game and would go to the absolute ends of the galaxy to believe that, to show and make people believe it too. and after some point, she felt guilty about stringing him along and talking about their future plans together. another morning she stopped by abruptly on her way from san diego, she knew she had to break things off with him. yet when she arrived at his place, she found him making breakfast and the brightest smile she hadn't seen in awhile. he went along and continued with his breakfast but not before making a cup of coffee for her and a extra serving of his breakfast for her. before leading her over to the dining room table and held her hand as they ate. guilt crept up her spine as she looked at him, talking about something that had happened on a road trip and she felt a pang in her heart. she was a coward. rather than break the band aid and say what she'd wanted to say for months now...she let him continue to speak.

he was a better person than she was, she thought. he would have ended things a long time ago if he'd felt what she'd felt or thought. he wouldn't have continued to string her along. he was a good person like that. but her? she was half the person he was, he was a good person with good intentions. the culprit?

she didn't want to be alone.

◦

I make excuses, my friends know the truth is I'm not as alright as I claim I say that I'm fine, I tell them all the time As they watch all the life fade away

◦

the life was draining from her and her friends watched as it did. she was hiding herself away in her los angeles apartment, shortly after she stopped writing. they were all rightfully concerned with her mental health and wouldn't take the 'im fine's!" she hurled at them time and time again. they even reached out to trevor and even he could not get her to come out of her shell. though, he never got the full story of why she was like that. he dropped around unannounced before and after practice, sometimes staying the night but most times slipping out after she'd fallen asleep. but not without a soft kiss to her temple, and tiptoeing out. his family and friends grew concerned when he opted to stay in newport for the offseason. by the offseason, she'd gone back into the studio and pushed through. the studio eating up whatever she had written, and loved it all.

◦

I pretend that it's love, love

'Cause what if I never find anything better? The doubt always creeps through my mind So we'll stay together 'cause how could I ever Trade somethin' that's good for what's right?

◦

with no end in sight, she continued to push through with the relationship, trying to get back to how things were before when she was without a doubt, happy and in love. when trevor does finally leave the sunshine state to go visit family and friends, she stays up thinking about her and trevor's future. would she find anybody better than him? would she find the love that they shared early in their relationship? would she find somebody almost as arrogantly confident? somebody with an infinite passion for what they do? their (affectionately) dumb friends who adored her? and somebody with a zest for life? her journals filled to the brim that summer with what had been eating her up inside.

when trevor comes back right before the season begins, he take's her out to malibu one early morning before the sunrise. she was groggy and tired from the night before, and so when she was awoken abruptly she groaned; trying to desperately to go back to bed. trevor said that he wanted to go for a sunrise and she hummed, thinking he'd go by himself. but instead, he tickled her enough to wake her up and she dreaded getting out of bed. they drove up to malibu that September 2nd, and held one another as he wrapped his arms around her from behind. he bit the inside of his cheek, body filled with nerves and anxiety. he whispered her name to begin with, and in the most trevor and most un trevor way, he proposed. she turned around to see him with tears in his eyes and visible anxiety washed over his features. she smiled softly feeling the inside of her scream to say no and beg her to leave the life she grown used to the past mere months. her smile grew wider and faker, as she said yes. trevor had gotten her dream ring from new york, and she gushed as he pulled it out. tears swelled her eyes as she felt her heart tug at the effort he'd made for her. she was going to show him the same effort as well, even if it hurt her to no end.

◦

her record label demanded an ep of some new songs they knew she undoubtedly had written after she got engaged. her album release was a massive success, going #1 and platinum in many countries. her career was reaching new heights and she was engaged? she was the it girl everybody wanted to be. yet she felt so very far from it, but kept that signature smile on at all times.

she felt herself buy into the idea of marrying trevor when she saw how excited her family was when they showed up to a private dinner the very evening of her album released. they gushed and gushed over the ring and endless possibilities her and trevor could have together. she saw how good both of their families bonded and got along with one another. she could feel the pride and gratitude that oozed off of trevor that night. he loved - no absolutely adored this life the universe had bespoked upon him. the singer was just another addition. he thought he had everything before they met, but when he saw her get absolutely hammered at a party they were both invited to; he was enamored. the grace she carried herself with when dancing, talking, singing and most importantly; the love she oozed for her friends was intoxicating. he could not and never wanted to get enough of it.

the look he gave her that night was one she'd never, ever forget in this lifetime. it was how all girls wished to be looked at. the one that would spare nothing to make their partner happy. the one where you know they'd go to the ends of the earth for you and with you. it was as if she hung the moon and the stars for him.

who would pass that up?

◦

I let the thought in, it's already done

◦

she brought into the idea of going through with the wedding after the release party and found herself immersed in wedding planning. she found herself non stop traveling with trevor that summer, after a serious playoff run. she found herself thinking of their future together because lets be honest, it was there. and she couldn't help but get excited just a bit when trevor had said, that she was going to be most beautiful bride and future mom to ever grace this planet. she looked at him through the mirror and again that look, captivated and brought her in.

◦ But I lay in your arms and pretend that it's love Yeah, I lay in your arms and pretend it's enough

◦

their wedding was a dream. an absolute dream. hollywood and hockey royalty showed up and showed out. the wedding of all weddings. they danced the night away to taylor swift. then as a surprise, trevor and his groomesman shamelessly, did a group dance to one of her upbeat songs as she sat there blushing like a fool, covering her face in embarrassment. they spent the night basking in everybody's presence, the singer not having a second to spare a second thought about what was going to be coming in the next few months. she knew that the world and everybody in their lives would be asking about kids and what not. yet, she pushed that towards the back of her mind. she played the role of a loving and adoring newlywed. she smiled to the camera's as if there was no tomorrow. her friends actually believing that she was happy and that she had found her way back to trevor. and in a way, that was true. she felt stuck with no way out.

the couple retreated back to the ritz carlton new york hotel suite, with a bottle of very expensive champagne, thin slice pizza and new york cheesecake. after stuffing their faces in between making out, the two fell asleep. or at least trevor did. the singer looked up at the ceiling, wide awake and unable to sleep. she had played the part this long...what was another ten?

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

umm....sorry about that! part two is coming at some point because i wanna hurt myself even more lmao...

please like and reblog if you did and id love to hear your thoughts too!

tags: @cuttergauthier @zegrasbabyyy @hockeyboysarehot @slafgoalskybaby @sc0tters @sweetestdesire @jayda12 @starshine-hockey-girl @cellythefloshie

[linktoo-doodles]

Although the core of tntduo is based around their inability to be on the same side of one another despite their similarities, do you think conflict with discduo could have brought them together? I know Wilbur’s jealousy around Tommy and who can and can’t “protect him” is a major roadblock for a lot of his insecurities, but if it was properly addressed along side Q’s tendency to build walls with people that make him vulnerable, do you think there could’ve been a major shift that brought not only them but the entire ensemble back into a healing mess of a community ? (I’m a bit of a sucker for hopeful narratives if this question isn’t obvious and Tommy’s whole character being a symbol of hope really drives this concept but I’d love to hear what you think!)

Or I guess in short; What would’ve had to happen if tntduo were to actually end up working together and potentially mending their fucked up relationship?

yeah! I wish they worked together at least once. Something corny and just working together to help defeat cDream at the very end feels right. To actually tie off their arcs though, not quite because cQuackity seems like someone who would reestablish trust and bonds that are with other people first, lack of trust was not really a theme with tntduo.

In my idea of the ending the moment, after setting things straight with the original L'manburg crew, Wilbur would still leave. After apologizing to Tommy and giving themselves space. I think spiritually it's a representative of Wilbur's YCGMA album song "I'm sorry Boris".

I think Wilbur should have stayed until Dream was no longer an active threat to Tommy, and then left... maybe one day to return, or one day people come to him in his new life to start things again.

And (lmfao I feel like a tntduo traitor here) imo tntduo was never really like... "meant" for each other at least romantically. I think they'd work out their feelings, they'd be on their way to become good friends again. They'd remember quiet moments of solidarity, of them understanding the other, but they'd end up just staying friends in the end. I don't think tntduo would ever be a domestic couple happily ever after because at the end of the day, the chase was what was fun about their dynamic. They seem to be people that wouldn't end up Being Together in the long run.

Healing can come with realizing youre not good for someone romantically tbh, and it's what I see for tntduo. I'll forever mourn for the fact the L'manberg crew was never able to heal and move on.

[hillbilly---man]

A list of my works on AO3

(they're all Saiki K fics at the moment but I'll add fandom categories to this post if I ever get a new interest lol)

It doesn't fit my plans; it's something I don't understand

Published July 11, 2021

Summary: Saiki is fascinated by Satou Hiroshi, and the people around him start to see that this might be more than just a platonic curiosity.

What is this feeling called love?

[Notes: Bittersweet ending. Nobody gets together. My insistence on theming these early fics after songs is pretty embarrassing now. I'm not proud of my writing here but the story is ok. I might rewrite it someday. Not bad for my first fic since like 2003 though]

Something Changed

Published August 11, 2021

Summary: Aiura wrote a letter to her soulmate the night before they were supposed to meet.

She's predicted a lot of things... how could she have gotten this one wrong?

[Notes: Another sad ending. The format of this is almost entirely an excited letter about the future Aiura imagined that would never come to pass. Not really much of a story happening here tbh]

Won't it be strange when we're all fully grown?

Published August 28, 2021 (INCOMPLETE)

Summary: With graduation quickly approaching, the psychics of PK Academy (and Akechi) worry that they'll drift apart. Luckily, they come up with an idea.

"Let's all meet up in the year 2030!"

A lot can change in a decade.

[Notes: Kind of like a psychicker class reunion where they're all adults with jobs and everything catching up. Future chapters were going to have almost a Scooby Doo vibe (with a twist reveal at the end about Aiura's husband!) I abandoned it because I posted some art and someone called my art creepy and it made the whole fic feel bad to think about. Maybe I'll get back to it someday. It's cool to see how quickly my writing improved. I was also super proud of how well I wrote Akechi's dialogue here]

Hotel Valentine

Published September 24, 2021

Summary: Toritsuka Reita is a pretty lucky guy. He somehow managed to not get expelled from PK Academy, he graduated, and he's avoided creeping on any living girls for a few months. To celebrate, the PK Psychics paid for a one-night stay in the fanciest hotel in Tokyo so Reita can creep on the ghost girl of his dreams. Pretty lucky, right?

Too bad things aren't going his way. He's being ignored by the staff, he's bored out of his mind, and he can't find the ghost girl anywhere. Some vacation, huh?

[Notes: Spoiler: Toritsuka's a ghost stuck in a nice hotel. This is based on a concept album that most of you have never heard but hear me out! It really has nothing to do with the Cibo Matto album of the same title except that the chapters are named after the songs and there are fun Easter eggs for fans of the album. Another slightly sad ending but not too bad]

Coffee & TV

Published August 27th, 2022

Summary: The new silence in her house felt heavy on Kumi's shoulders. Everything reminded her of Kumagoro... especially her grandson Kusuo, who has been coming to visit more often than ever before.

[Notes: this is my least popular finished fic and I understand why. It's about grief and the loss of a grandparent. It's about the unique pain that a psychic would have after failing to prevent that death. There's a sad twist that TBH I think I was a little too subtle with. One of my favorites]

Friendly Fire

Published January 8, 2023

Summary: Being an adult is great until the Problems start. Good grief.

30-year-old Kusuo's psychic powers have been pretty well controlled for over a decade. Why are things starting to go haywire all of a sudden?

[Notes: Friendly Fire my fucking beloved!! In this fic, Saiki gets essentially psychic multiple sclerosis and has to deal with some complicated emotions. I don't think it's a masterpiece or anything but it was cathartic to write and I'm in love with the versions of these characters that I wrote here. So much so that I'm writing a sequel just so I can write more of them. Also, FINALLY a happy ending!!]

Ramen Ikouze?

Published April 28, 2023

Summary: After being dragged to get ramen with Nendou every week, Kusuo starts to realize that it's not so bad after all.

[Notes: I love Nendou, he's so good. This fic is very cute and about their friendship. A couple of fun twists]

Saiki has Plans?

Published May 2, 2023

Summary: Saiki mentions having plans after school, and the overactive imaginations at PK Academy work themselves into a fuss trying to imagine what he could be doing.

[Notes: This fic follows around a bunch of Saiki's classmates as they gossip and snoop to find out what he's up to. It's my most popular fic for some reason]

A Bright Flash

Published May 13, 2023

Summary: Saiki develops an annoying new ability, and through some comedy series logic is forced to tell Teruhashi about it. She tries to be a good ally to her "newly psychic" crush.

[Notes: Teruhashi accidentally finds out about Saiki's new power and he's like "fine. I'm a psychic. But it's just this one power and nothing else."]

Heat Wave

Published June 6, 2023

Summary: There's a historic heat wave in Hidariwakibara, and some of our favorite PK Academy students end up running into each other while taking refuge from the hot weather.

A series of four standalone (but connected) stories taking place at the same time:

Aiura has a vision of disaster, and she and Nendou try to stop it

Yumehara gives Toritsuka some advice to improve his game

Akechi meets Teruhashi's brother

Saiki really wants some shaved ice from the kakigori stand where Mera is working

[Notes: The summary explains it well but also I weaved so many connections between the chapters (that are all happening at roughly the same time). It was also a lot of fun writing interactions between characters that didn't get much in canon. Also you can tell it was hot as hell when I wrote it because I definitely gave Saiki some kind of psychic heat intolerance lol]

Immunity

Published July 6, 2023

Summary: She didn't know why, but Kokomi was finally able to see the truth.

Why Saiki seemed to appear and disappear without explanation. Why it seemed like he always knew what she was planning. Why he wore those weird hairpins.

It was all so obvious now.

Saiki had psychic powers.

[Notes: The veil is lifted suddenly and all the truths that Saiki kept locked behind his mind control were revealed to Teruhashi. He and Aiura have a chat with her about it. Also this was the first fic of mine that an IRL friend read (to my knowledge) and his comment was something like "I don't know anything about your boy but he sounds autistic and gnc" and I took that as a fucking compliment! You know you've written Saiki right when people can see that shit from space]

The Disastrous Financial Situation of Saiki K

Published August 9, 2023 (IN PROGRESS)

Summary: Adjusting to his new limitations has been annoying, and now Kusuo (age 31) needs a car to get around.

Unfortunately, taking time off work has drained his savings.

How is he going to get the money for a car now?

[Notes: This is my sequel to Friendly Fire but it's a lot lighter in nature. 100-Yen-Man goes around doing stuff for Saiki's friends. There are mentions of his disability from Friendly Fire and it's plot relevant but I think you can catch on even if you didn't read the original. I haven't updated in a while but I am actively working on it!! A Yumehara and Makino chapter next and then a Toritsuka chapter after that. TBH this isn't my best work and it's pretty unpopular but I'm having fun and that's all that counts)

[xxlady-lunaxx]

Beauty and the Beast | {ObaMitsu}

Theme: Angsty fluff

Note: EVER JUST THE SAMEEEEEE EVER A SURPRISEEE!! EVER AS BEFORE, EVER JUST AS SURE, AS THE SUN WILL RISEEE ✨

i love the song Tale as Old as TIme tbh (i can't see shit rn nd i messed up writing 'tbh' like 15 times... /srs)

Obanai sat with his head buried in his hands, his bandages no where to be seen.

Fuck. He'd been careless. And stupid. 

He hadn't slept in several days then he'd gone off one a mission and let the stupid demon cut off his bandages the same day he'd forgotten to bring extra. And he didn't have anywhere to go given that his crow had gotten hurt at one point—not the curtesy of the demon, luckily—so he didn't have any missions and the closest place here was a small shelter that looked like it would fall in at any moment.

Nevertheless, he'd stayed there, desperately needing some sleep. And now he was feeling useless and horrible because if anyone were to come here before his crow came back, they'd see his face.

Horrid. He couldn't imagine what would play out if that were to happen. 

And so he sat there, Kaburamaru sliding across the floor in search for a place that might appear warmer and never finding any.

But then there was a knock at the door and, upon noting it wasn't a demon—and mostly from instinct—he said, "Hm?"

"Uhm... Oh! Iguro-San, you're here? I'm glad... Can I come in?" Mitsuri's voice slipped past the thin barrier the cabin created. 

It was windy and cold outside of this place as well, though it didn't do much but somewhat helped block the wind. And Obanai hated the thought of Mitsuri to be cold, especially when he noted that there was a shiver in her voice as she spoke. 

He lifted his sleeve, letting his haori cover his face, then he opened the door, letting the Hashira in.

"Iguro-San! Hi! I heard you didn't have your crow or anything and so I came here." Mitsuri offered him a sweet smile and he nearly melted right then and there. "Do you not have any bandages?" she asked then, noting how he was covering his face.

He shook his head. "No," he said, his voice muffled by his sleeve. "I... forgot to bring any and the ones I usually wear got, uhm, torn." He sounded so stupid right now.

"Awh... Well! Good news is I got some," Mitsuri said, smiling brightly. "Want me to help you put them on?" she asked.

Obanai hesitated. He would love to have her put them on if it weren't for the fact that he looked like a demon, himself, without the bandages. 

"It's alright if you don't," Mitsuri said, probably noting his hesitation.

But he took it as that she'd misinterpreted it as unwanting her there and he scrambled for a response. "You... can help! Just, uhm, I'll... turn this way and then you don't have to look at my face," he said, saying more than he'd meant to in his nervousness.

"Hm? But your face is pretty," she said, quite cheerfully. Then flushed. 

Obanai's cheeks were a deep shade of pink as he shook his head, flustered. "No, uhm... I'm not pretty," he mumbled. Then, deciding that sounded ungrateful for her compliment, "but thank you. You're the... pretty one, Kanroji," he added quietly. 

The two Hashira sat there for a long moment, their faces brushed with pink in their embarrassment. 

"Iguro-San, I have complete faith that you're beautiful. Nothing could ruin that!" Mitsuri said after another minute of silence.

"No... You simply say that because you're far too kind, Kanroji. My... appearance is nothing of the sort that could be complimented at all. From my eyes to... the reason I wear the bandages. None of it is 'beautiful,'" Obanai concluded, his sleeve slipping over his eyes as well. Fuck, he was going to cry. 

"No!" Mitsuri said, her voice defiant and almost... sad. "No, you're not anything but beautiful, Iguro-San!! I love your eyes—the different colors are so pretty and I love how they almost seem to glow when you're happy. Your hair is very pretty too! I love the darkness of the color and how soft and soothing it looks. And I'm sure whatever you have under your bandages is quite so beautiful because you have not a flaw in you," she said, her arms crossed as she stared at him as if waiting for him to defy her.

And then, perhaps from exhaustion or perhaps he was tired of hiding it, Obanai's arm fell to his lap, his face completely exposed. He averted his eyes, staring at the ground instead. He wish Kaburamaru was with him, to tell him what to do, but the snake had slipped out to give the two privacy a couple minutes ago and now he was alone. 

Mitsuri gasped, seeing the deep mark the scar had left on him, the only physical sign that he'd been through anything in the past. "Oh, Iguro-San..." she murmured, moving forwards and reaching out. She hesitated, then, unsure if she should, and her arm fell to her side. 

"You see?" Obanai whispered. "I'm ugly. I'm not beautiful. I could never be. You are a beauty, Kanroji. Something I could never be. I'm... sorry. For not meeting your expectations. Or not pleasing your eyes."

A silence drew the room to one without movement for a long while and Obanai figured that Mitsuri might've left right now somehow if no one was saying anything.

But then two hands were placed on his cheeks to lift his gaze up and his eyes widened.

"K...Kanroji?" he said uncertainly.

Mitsuri's face had contorted to a somewhat mad one, though she looked quite adorable with this expression and none the angry bear. Her eyes met Obanai's and she said, slowly at first as if trying to make a child understand, "You're every bit the worth the world. You're every positive comment and compliment and you're beautiful, Iguro-San. I don't want to hear you say otherwise. Every part of you will have it's own story, whether it's good or bad but regardless you're still the amazing, cool, and pretty Iguro-San I've ever known, understood? You musn't say otherwise, you musn't think otherwise because it is not true! So do not, under any circumstances, say you're ugly again. Because you're not!! I swear on my life, you're one of the most beautiful people I've met." And then she let go of his face with one hand, tracing the scar, his nose, his cheeks with her finger, the action so gentle and loving Obanai nearly collapsed upon her. 

"I..." he started, but a finger was place to his lips to sience him.

"Will you promise me to not say bad stuff about yourself anymore?" Mitsuri asked sternly.

Obanai's eyes fluttered and he nodded slowly. He would do it for her. 

"Good," she said, releasing his face. "I'm... sorry for going so close to you."

"No... No, it's alright," Obanai said. Then, figuring she'd already seen the worst of him and still somehow hadn't run away screaming, said, "Kanroji, may I... confess something?"

"Anything," Mitsuri said, smiling gently at him. "Whatever you want, Iguro-San!"

"I... Uhm... I've liked you for a while... I was afraid to say anything or mention it because of my scar. My... family did horrible things in the past and, in short, I tried escaping and got them all killed—knowing that they might be killed. Yes, I was young, but it's still no excuse. I didn't want to tell you this because... well, who was I fit to date such a pretty girl? If you ever accepted, anyways. I was equally fearing that you would be disgusted by my scar, but you haven't been yet—or at least you aren't making it obvious. And because of that, I... wanted to tell you this," he said, his eyes catching everything but her. 

She went silent for a moment before she said, "Oh, Iguro-San, oh, I do love you much so!!" She nearabout burst into tears and clung onto him. "Of course I want to date you!!"

Still with shock, Obanai nearly forgot to say anything. "R...Really?" 

"Yes! Yes, I'm so happy right now," Mitsuri cried out. 

He patted her head, unsure what to do. She sat up suddenly and Obanai realized just how close they actually were.

"Iguro-San! Can... I kiss you?" she asked nervously.

Kiss him. She wanted to kiss him? "...Yes, yes you don't have to ask," Obanai said, slipping his hand under her chin.

Their eyes fluttered closed and Mitsuri pressed her lips against his tenderly, gently.

Kaburamaru slipped back inside right at that moment, taking one look at the two before going back out.

They pulled apart, breathless from the experience. 

"Iguro-San?"

"Hm?"

"Are we dating now?"

Obanai paused. "Do you want us to be?" he asked.

She laughed. "Of course! I want to be with you always, Iguro-San. Through life and death!!"

He smiled back. "Then yes."

{Word count: 1473}

Mitsuri realizing she never gave him the bandages later

happy new yearsss :3 i wrote this in like 40 mins in my bed when i'm not allowed online muahahaha >:D (i snuck my laptop upstairs Xd)

anywho

Idk where this random burst of motivation came from but hopefully it stays bc i keep starting my requests and not finishing them :'>

[luciddreamingcroww]

☾𓄿☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟIntroduction☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟ𓄿☽

+Friend application- Partner application

{Pls pls pls I'm so desperate to have a online friend}

Hello^^ my name is Kristi, I'm a artist and also a fanfiction writer {my fan fic page is LucidDrLibrary }

Kristina

Female {she/her}

Lesbian {wlw/nmlnm} & Demi Aroace {only capable of having feelings for someone only after there's a emotional bond/attachment}

16 {turning 17 on the 22 of December}

Autistic {currently trying to get a proper diagnosis with the help of my therapist}

Easter European

⋆⭒˚｡⋆My Interests☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟ

{btw this will be organised from topics I could rant about all day to casual appreciation}

Hypertensions/Special interests

{Things I can talk about all day and every day}

Genshin impact++

Cookie run Kingdom/Ovenbreak++

Vulture culture + Taxidermy + Wet specimens

TRINKET COLLECTING!! {I love it sm}

Psychology {especially maladaptive daydreaming, autism and how they can affect the human mind and experience}

Astrology {More specifically the Greek myths behind the constellations and why were they formed}

Drawing/painting

More casual but still adore talking about it

Crows

Honkai star rail

Witchcraft and paganism {currently learning more and starting to practice it}

Reverse 1999 { I don't know anything about it but I want to play it so bad + I have a crush on the tooth fairy}

Sculpting

Long video essays (when drawing)

Casual interests that I may not focus on as much (rarely thinking about it but still liking it)

Plush making

Warrior cats

I love Amy

{I'll add more here if I remember it in the future}

⋆⭒˚｡⋆My Favourite music artists⋆⭒˚｡

Starset

Fav album - Vessels

The neighborhood

My favourite songs

Temporal tower - pkm mystery dungeon

Time gear - pkm mystery dungeon

Never ever forget - pkm mystery dungeon

Gravity of you - Starset

Everglow - Starset

Dark on me - Starset

Stratosphere - Starset

Where the skies end - Starset

You get me so high all the time - the neighborhood

Flawless - the neighborhood

Female robbery - the neighborhood

Unfair - the neighborhood

Void - the neighborhood

A little death - the neighborhood

The perfect girl - Mareux

It's snowing like the end of the world - Krobak

⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

✧What I'd like in a friendship✧

Tbh I'd really like to have one of those friendships where you could talk about anything whenever and just have a overall nice bond, I know and understand that things like these take a bit time to develop but I still really want it because I'm overall really isolated and I can just make time for anyone tbh

I would really prefer if the person I'm bonding with likes the same hyperfixations/special interests as I do {especially vulture culture because I really want to share my passion about it without making people uncomfortable and such}

Btw if you wanna be my friend just feel free to message me^^ if you only like I won't really get the hint that u wann be friends.

⋆⭒˚｡⋆As for a ending to this post I'd like to show some of my art :)⋆⭒˚｡⋆

[thesherrinfordfacility]

Have we taken into consideration that Aziraphale's last glance towards Crowley before he got on the elevator might just be to send him a signal of "i need your help"? 'Cause I've just rewatched episode 6 and it's the first time my lightbulb went out that Crowley is there to watch Aziraphale's entire face journey after hearing about the Second Coming and that's why Aziraphale looks one last time towards Crowley. Yes, of course there are those sentiments of regret and resentment and all that complicated mix, but also, I think it's a signal towards him of "when the time comes and I know how, I'll need your helping hand. I could always rely on you, please trust me". All that with the added signal of turning on "A Nightingale Sang In Berkeley Square" in the Bentley (because, Y E S, that miracle chime is VERY clearly audible right before it starts playing) is telling Crowley what he couldn't anymore directly.

good morning @crowleykinning my beloved💕

i think that look can be interpreted multiple different ways, and i think it depends on how you read the scene before it? like, i read the look as a combination of -

'oh shit' / 'yep, told you.', to

'please come with me' / 'nope, you chose this.', to

'is this what you were warning me about?' / 'tried, yeah, but i wanted to protect you.', to

'im going to need your help' / 'yep, and i hope i'll give it to you when the time comes', to

'trust me to see this through, please' / 'i do... don't really have much of a choice.', to

'wait for me?' / '...yeah, alright.', to

'i love you' / 'i know, i love you too, but it's not enough right now.'

and a thousand other interpretations asides - a Look can be quite versatile!

it's a cacophony, 6000 years, of different sentiments and unspoken words, and i almost don't think it's really for us to understand? idk how to put it, but it's the same look at any lovers or friends give each other just before disaster hits - because whilst the Feral Domestic was a catastrophe in and of itself, this is the brief lull before all hell (pardon the pun) breaks loose.

im also not entirely sure what to make of the song playing; and im almost hoping that it's never explained, because any explanation holds its own weight and importance.

it was crowley (which, to me - given that he walks away in the direction of the bentley in the below gif, and by the end of the ep the driver's window is down - is the logical explanation), having queued it ready to go to the Ritz

it was aziraphale, slapped in the face with the 'no nightingales' line, after it playing at the end of s1 and in the missing 1941 scene, tries to get into crowley's head that none of what happened means that he doesn't love him

it was the bentley - my beloved, back again with the poor timing and heartbreaking bitch behaviour after the bookshop fire and slipping 'somebody to love' onto the decks, as some measure of comfort? or expressing her own upset? reflecting crowley's thoughts/feelings?

it was just a coincidence that that song happened to be playing. im not sure where i sit on the 'god has the aux' thought process (most of me doesn't like it, tbh), but i do think there is something to be said about it being, literally, just a cruelly-timed accident.

as for the miracle chime, the timing of it vs. aziraphale still reeling in the wake of the second coming bombshell personally satisfies me that it was the metatron's miracle, to call the lift in the donkey pub.

but we do know that regardless, aziraphale and crowley both, if not all of these beings, are able to influence the world around them... whatever happened with the song in the bentley doesn't necessarily need to have been a conscious, hand-waving effort!!!✨

[acaplaya-musings]

Voiceplay Visuals: Hellfire

As IF I was ever going to skip over this video!!!!

Voiceplay's cover of Hellfire was released on the 7th of October, 2023 (being their Halloween upload for the year), and, fun fact, it was the first Voiceplay video I watched after a sort of personal "hiatus" of 1-1.5 years, where they had somehow fallen off my radar for a while (which can happen when A, you weren't originally subscribed to them and mostly just relied on the Youtube algorithm/recommended section, and B, you previously only watched videos for songs you were already familiar with (I know better now though, obviously), plus a few other random factors). Geoff's cover of Jack's Lament was the first from his channel I had seen in quite a while (thank you YouTube algorithm for actually being helpful!), and I stumbled upon Hellfire the following day. And man what a video to bring me back into the fold!

Both video and arrangement were done Layne, and although this is another "guest feature" for J None (he did 5 full-length videos with Voiceplay in 2023!), he's only a backing vocalist for most of this one. Who took lead vocals? Geoff! Apparently Layne was wanting Voiceplay to do a cover of Hellfire for quite a while, and had always envisioned Geoff as the main singer for it, but Geoff, for a long time, said no. I don't know/can't remember what his exact reasoning was; whether he just thought the song was too dark or he thought he wouldn't be able to do it justice, but obviously Layne eventually managed to persuade him (made him an arrangement he couldn't refuse, I'm guessing, because seriously this arrangement is STUNNING), and quite frankly I am forever in Layne's debt for it!

I have no estimate of how long this post might be or how much I'll actually have to say about the screencaps I share, but I'll try to make this worthwhile, and so without further ado, let's get into this!

Pretty "basic"/"simple" visuals here, but honestly that's all that's needed for this one! For one thing, the vocals/arrangement are amazing enough to shine on their own (kinda like with Nothing Else Matters), and for another thing, this may be a Disney villain song, but at the same time it's not really a "Disney Song", y'know? This ain't Friends On The Other Side, or Poor Unfortunate Souls, or Be Prepared; this is a song about deep internal conflict, "burning desire", and attempts to suppress said burning desire, which only leads to more trouble. This is a villain song taken completely seriously, and boy oh boy do Voiceplay nail it!

(I feel like I should also mention that I've never actually watched The Hunchback Of Notre Dame, but I know the characters, I know the story, and this song speaks for itself tbh.)

I mean of course all the guys understood the assignment for this one but Cesar really Understood👏The👏Assignment!👏

I can't believe I'm having one of my "hang on a minute-" moments on freaking Hellfire of all videos, but somehow I never noticed the purple gemstone ring that Eli is wearing here before now! (And Cesar is wearing a red gemstone ring as well, which I only just spotted in a previous shot).

Yep, Layne's got a gemstone ring on as well!

I'm guessing J has got a matching ring as well, but I'm fairly certain Geoff doesn't, because he's got this gemstone necklace instead, which of course helps to further identify him as the lead vocalist/"main character" in this one.

(And even though Voiceplay seem to wear black/dark colours a fair bit (and Geoff does a lot), I still really freaking love the costuming in this video. They all look so good!!!!!)

Yep, there it is! J has a ring as well!

"BURN IT"

((If you've been reading/paying attention to all my Voiceplay Visuals posts, you might have picked up that usually, Geoff is the only one who gets bold font for quotes, but I'm more than willing to make an exception this time, because goddamn))

"This fire in my skin"

The way he looks down at his hands and arms as if feeling himself changing, as if there really are flames coursing right underneath the surface of the skin!!!!

"This burning desire, is turning me to s i n"

Not here to make fun or tease this time, certainly not! Geoff did a fantastic acting job in this one, and his delivery of every single vocal line was just absolutely *chefs kiss*

Everyone else was brilliant in this too, and Cesar absolutely had some attention-grabbing moments of his own! 😄

The "it's not my fault!" section of the song is really cleverly done here imo. (it's technically visual as well! I can talk about it!) It gives other members a bit more of a chance to shine, in a song which (aside from the Latin chanting in the background) is only meant to be a one-man performance. And the video (arrangement included) does this by turning Layne, J, Eli, and Cesar into a sort of Greek Chorus, or more specifically, a "singing chorus" (yes, that's a real thing, which I learned about when I was double-checking to see if I actually remembered the correct meaning of Greek Chorus). Singing choruses are sometimes incorporated into musical theatre and grand opera, and are "used frequently to interpret the mental and emotional reactions of the principal characters, after the manner of a Greek chorus." And while Eli and Cesar are taking over the lead for this bit here, Geoff becomes a little bit more subdued, head slightly bowed, just doing some little self-conducting hand movements as he holds down the bassline (I'm assuming, though I can't really hear him at all in the background until his arpeggios(?) when J takes over (look, sometimes you really can't fully describe/talk about what's happening on screen without talking about the audio that goes with it!!!))

Cesar with the sick air guitar! (Not all reactors seemingly noticed this moment, which is a damn crime tbh (you can actually see him doing it in the group shot just a few seconds before this too, though that part I myself didn't pick up on till just now))

I can't remember seeing a single reaction video (out of the ones I've watched at least) that actually figured out who the Guard was, even though it's in the description of the video! (Though I guess those who were watching from Patreon have more of an excuse). It's Tony! (Also, this means that this video featured 4 "generations" of Voiceplay baritones - Layne, Tony, J, and Cesar!)

I've heard one or two reactors say they wish they could have seen the guard's face, but nah, I don't think it's necessary. He's there to provide Relevant Information for progression of the plot/song/scene, and that's it! His identity is irrelevant!

(But still, shoutout to Tony!)

"what" (hhhhhh)

"I'll find her,"

"I'll find her and I'll find her if I have to burn down all of PARIS!"

(He did so well! <3 <3 <3)

At first when I watched this video I was like "wow I really love this video, but should I like this video so much? Considering the context/meaning behind the song and all that?" That lasted for like maybe a week maximum. I adore this cover and this video and I make no apologies about it!)

*swoon*

Very cool flame effect in the eyes! According to one reaction video I watched, that likely was not easy to do, but it's a great addition to the already-very-awesome video!

The zoom-out on Geoff is done brilliantly for dramatic effect here as well!

Do I even need to say it at this point? 😂😅

Well anyway, obligatory "he's so pretty!" comment

(Here's a slight shot of Cesar's ring btw)

Man I love it when he belts <3

Firstly, the absolute power and feeling that Geoff put into this, like it's absolutely amazing to watch and it delights me to no end. Secondly, I wasn't going to include that third pic above, but turns out Geoff is wearing a gemstone ring as well! (maybe more than one?) I knew he was wearing rings in the video, but I just assumed they were his wedding/engagement rings, as he pretty much always wears them in videos (unless he can't for costuming purposes), one on each hand, but now I wonder if he was in fact wearing them at all in this video?

Excuse me while I just- *muffled yelling into pillow*

As I type this, Voiceplay's cover of Hellfire is just 4,700 views away from reaching one million hits on YouTube! I hope it gets there, it certainly deserves it (and more!). (UPDATE: As of the morning of the 20th of February (AEST timezone), it's now at one million views! Can I hear a wahoo!?!) (SECOND UPDATE: and it's now at over 1.1 million, as of the 25th of March!)

It's not exactly a typical Halloween-type video for Voiceplay, no super-elaborate character costumes or coloured face/body paint, but just like practically everything Voiceplay did in 2023, this was EPIC!

But anyway, I'll be skipping over Whiskey In The Jar, and I'm not doing any posts about Christmas videos (for now), which means that I'm finally onto the first two full-length uploads of 2024! (And I really would have expected there to be a third 2024 upload by this point, but it seems we're just gonna have to keep on waiting.) Stay tuned!

[aromanticannibal]

Ok, Feldup recs post!

Mostly my opinion (which is wildly positive) on his most recent album, Stared at from a Distance.

Warnings, this entire album talks about Feldup's SA from a woman twice his age. It's hard to listen to, it was hard to listen to for me, who suffered through no such experiences and isn't triggered, squicked or made uncomfortable by many things.

First, I'd advise that you listen to the entire album all at once (which breaks throughout if needed), in order and with lyrics (there are subtitles in the linked video). I promise it's worth it. Now for my favorite songs :

Stared at from a Distance (2nd track, 12:06), is obviously incredible and one of my faves. It's pretty long and is way more explicit on what it's talking about than Waters (4:55), the first track (which I really liked too, the music video for it is excellently made as well). I really love the way the instrumental and beat switches throughout to accompany the story, and the end of the song made me think I was going to cry (I just needed to sneeze but tbh it's still crying material). Really good, if you listen to only one song in the album I think it should be this one. (Side note, I'm also wondering if I didn't hear part of that song when I was at Feldup's concert - it was before the album was out, but you know. I don't think I heard all of it, but maybe I just forgot).

Naked and Afraid (3rd track, 3:11) is very good and picks up very well after the second track. It makes you understand that this album really is a story you're following, and you're going to get every detail of it. The following track, Dizzy (4:11) is transitioned to so well I thought it was the same song (it's also excellent), and Fear of Abandonment (4:07) right after is like. Painful. /pos

Shove it (6th track, 03:39) is honestly terrifying to listen to, and it works very well for its subject. I don't even have much to talk about for this one, it's just really good. The 7th track, Moment of Sobriety (5:30) managed to be even scarier, because of how real it gets then (if that makes sense. The whole album is painfully real, and it reminds you of this regularly).

Crying as a Weapon (8th track, 5:20) is where I had to take a break. I think it might be one of the most relatable songs for many people who were abused, not just sexually.

Death of an Illusion (9th track, 10:23) is the other very long track of this album and it is, unsurprisingly, incredible, and one of my absolute favorites. It's also one I could relate to a lot, and its progression is very satisfying. It Never Leaves (9:09) is similar to Death of an Illusion, its continuity, and its ending made me incredibly happy.

The last one, To Love Again (4:49), is the song I enjoyed the less, musically speaking, but one of my favorites nevertheless, and a perfect ending for the album in my opinion. It also has a shift in the... well, not the narration, but I guess the message, somewhat (trying not to spoil because it's so incredible to realize to me), which entirely convinced me this is actually my favorite album of all time construction-wise.

In conclusion, Oh My Fucking God this is so incredible.

Feldup is a great person who writes incredible texts and makes excellent music. The constructions of his songs and the way his story is told throughout eleven tracks is beautiful and heartbreaking and hopeful, and it genuinely is currently changing my brain chemistry /hj. It is so good. It's on Spotify and Bandcamp for sure, and I think it's on most other streaming services, and you still have the Youtube video I linked at the top. Please give it a try.

I'll quickly give my favorite songs from his other album, A Thousand Doors, Just One Key, but they're all really good too : Falling Apart (2nd track, 4:08) which is his most known song as far as I'm aware and is a fucking banger from the first notes, Mental Health (6th, 4:25), Attention (3rd, 3:54), and Stockholm (10th, 11:21), which holds one of my favorite lyrics ever (There is no cure/I am the disease).

Anyways, have a good day or night, stream Feldup's music.

[sirenspells]

WIPs and abandoned projects (March 2021-December 2023)

Info on each one (as well as what the songs/audio sources are):

The song playing in the intro and outro is Dianthus Nardiformis from the Dreaming Mary OST.

19: March 2021. Okay so this one's not actually a work in progress. I made this on my 19th birthday, the joke being that the singer just says 19 then it ends. I think I thought it was kinda dumb so I didn't end up actually posting it. Also features a sona I had before Cress that I never really got attached to, so she was barely used. Song is 19 by Old 97's.

Lonely Holiday: July 2021. This has the honor of being the first OMORI mv I ever attempted. I started this on a whim while bored out of my mind dogsitting for a couple weeks, and I kinda just lost interest in it. Dunno if I'll go back to it. Song is Lonely Holiday by Old 97's.

Numb: July 2021. Another one I started while dogsitting, and another one I kinda just lost interest in, but I absolutely want to revisit it someday because it's an idea I've had for a while and still really want to do. Song is Numb (Linkin Park Cover) by Robyn Adele Anderson.

The Artist: December 2021. I stopped working on this one because doing everything manually frame-by-frame got really annoying and I started to hate working on it. I dunno why I did the zoom in manually but it looks bad, lol. The entire MV would have been just this verse of the song because I thought it really fit Basil and Omori. Tbh I still like how this looks and I may come back to it. Song is The Artist by The Hush Sound.

Higher: February 2022. It's the animation meme. I actually posted this wip a while ago but I'm still gonna include it here for completion's sake. This was really just storyboard practice, so I don't have much of an interest in completing it beyond this. It's Omori Strikers AU (my omori x persona 5 crossover au) and it's basically about Omori's identity issues due to being Sunny's Shadow. The quality's really bad on this one, for some reason iMovie refused to export it in a higher quality than this, I don't know why. Song is High by SIVIK.

Little Sunbeam: February 2022. This MV would have centered on the omari au, and beyond this it'd switch to Mari's pov and take on different palettes. Doing that text effect made working on this very annoying and would make my art program lag a lot so I lost interest in working on it. I might revisit this one, though I'd have to rework the original idea I had now that my perception on the common omari au has changed lol. Song is Little Sunbeam by Eleisha Eagle.

Nightmarish: April 2022. This MV would technically be a remake of one I made in 2020. Same song, same color palette, but with a completely new media. Part of wanting to work on this is wanting to spread Dreaming Mary propaganda cause I love it and I think people who like OMORI will like Dreaming Mary as well. Also I love this song. I definitely wanna go back to this one at some point. Song is Nightmarish from the Dreaming Mary OST.

Keep You Safe: July 2022. Like Higher I also posted this wip before but will still include it here. I absolutely want to go back to this one someday because I still really like the idea I have for it. Fun fact, for those who remember this piece, that was based on this MV, but it's not like you can tell based on what's shown here. Song is Keep You Safe by The Crane Wives.

Four Walls: August 2022. Amnesiac Omori MV, what would have been his youtube introduction if I hadn't stopped working on it and then made When Am I Gonna Lose You. I think I kinda just lost interest in this one, though I wanna go back to it at some point I think. Song is Four Walls (The Ballad of Perry Smith) by Bastille.

Someone Gets Hurt: January 2023. Amnesiac omori again babey!! Animatic that would have taken place after he regains his memories, where he's basically really angry and lashes out at Sunny and Stranger. Might revisit this one. Song is Someone Gets Hurt (Reprise) from the Mean Girls musical.

Uhh some shitpost: February 2023. Silly thing, it's a shame I stopped working on it before it actually got to the main funny part. I dunno if I'll go back to this one. Audio from @/tylergaca on twitter.

Jealous: March 2023. Animation meme. It would've been about Sunny and Mari in my pmd au and the leadup to the incident. It took me a while to get that second shot right and I still really don't like it. Do wanna revisit this one cause I love angst surrounding these two so much I love them in pmd au GRAHHH. Song is Jealous by Eyedress (slowed down).

Stranger lipsync test: May 2023. This was way too difficult as a lipsync test so I gave up on it, though I still like the animation for it. Also this is a pretty good contender for headcanon voice for Stranger I'll be real. Audio is from Persona 5 Royal.

Propaganda: August 2023. Amnesiac omori au storyboard that I do actually wanna make into a completed thing. This is very spoilery so my master plan is to not explain what's happening. Muah hah hah >:3c. Also once again iMovie exported this in a really bad quality for some reason. Song is Propaganda by Kill J.

Alter's Rant: December 2023. One more amnesiac omori animatic for the road. Once again it's really spoilery but it's basically Alter and Omori's final confrontation. I have more done than what's shown here but I wanna keep it a surprise for when I finish it, which should hopefully be soon >:3c. Also this one also got hit by iMovie's low quality curse. Song is Eva's Rant from Bring It On The Musical.