#i'm really proud of this one | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

decojellyfish · 1 month

Text

It's okay, love ♡

Hope you guys enjoy this one! Gaz needed a proper one, not just a drabble :) If you have any constructive criticism, please comment below! If you have any requests, or just want to say stuff to me, feel free to submit stuff!

------

Harpee Hawk! Gaz x Harpee Dove! Fem! Reader Both of you are nervous on your first date together :3

SFW ~ An odd combination of fluff, then angst, then fluff again :) Warnings: N/A

───♡───────────── Beginning You were waiting at the reserved table at the restaurant where you had planned to meet your date, fingers nervously fidgeting with the fabric of your dress. Your anxiety about being set up makes you glance at the time on your phone every 5 seconds. It was 2 minutes passed your agreed meeting time. You try to subtly fan yourself with your hand, nervousness setting in and making your skin slightly perspire and your white feathered wings twitch ever so slightly in anticipation.

Then you saw him. He came slightly rushing in, he knew he was a little late. You could see in his face. Although he was afar, at the entryway, you could see a slight glint of guilt in his eyes. He was scanning the restaurant for your face, but he spotted you because of your shiny, soft wings instead.

It made your stomach fill with enough butterflies to make a bug collector jealous with how his face suddenly lit up and he began to make his way to your table.

He spoke your name as he approached, almost in disbelief. He was just as astounded as you were as you took in each other’s beauty. It was kind of a brief awkward silence, which you two realized as you looked away from each other with a light blush dusted upon your cheeks.

“I-I’m Kyle.” He spoke, still in awe of your presence, as he held out his hand to you. You responded with your name, as well, and held his hand. You thought it was a handshake, although that would’ve been awfully business-like for a romantic date until he began to raise your hand to his face and he gently kissed your knuckles.

He looked at you the whole time, with you practically melting at the way his half-lidded eyes gazed into yours that were wide open at the surprise.

He then sat himself down in the seat across from you, “Sorry, love, f’ bein’ late. Traffic was complete chaos out there.” He chuckled, making you smile and laugh as well. “It’s okay, at least you showed up late rather than not at all.” You responded, adjusting the shoulder strap of your dress.

“Have you ordered anything yet?” “No, I was kind of waiting on you. I was just gonna wait until about 20 minutes passed our agreed time before I just ordered something or just went home.” You both laughed, a waitress soon approached your table and requested your order.

After you two had placed your orders, she left and you were left alone with each other again. You both stared at each other for a moment before he was the first one to speak up.

“You’re dress looks lovely. It goes well with your wings.” Kyle smiled, you could almost melt with the way his eyes shifted to the feathered protrusions in your back. His brown eyes began to sparkle with admiration before they returned to your face. “You look lovely…” He spoke softly, but loud enough for you to hear him.

You had never really made it this far when it came to a date, either being ghosted or stood up, or your date making you so uncomfortable that you say you’re off to the bathroom when, in reality, you’re booking it out of the agreed spot and going home. Something about the thought of someone caring for you so much that they would kiss you, greet you every morning, comfort you every night, and take you off on an adventure to experience new things together.

It felt so foreign to you. But with Kyle, you could feel the love radiating off of him. Honestly, it terrified you. This felt strange, weird, scary. Scary that you had never gotten this far, scary that you didn’t know what to do or where to go from here.

So you did what felt familiar.

You grabbed your purse, stood up, and spoke the words that felt like a safety blanket to you. “I-I just need to use the restroom for a bit, is that okay…?” “Oh, of course, love. I’ll be right here when you get back.”

He was oblivious, only an understanding smile appearing on his face. It made your heart almost shatter with guilt. But it was the only way you wouldn’t become an emotionally terrified wreck in front of the gorgeous piece of art that sat across from you.

Walking away from the table, you went in the direction of the bathroom, constantly checking over your shoulder to make sure he couldn’t see you before abruptly changing direction and going towards the entrance. You grabbed your coat, quickly putting it on as the host thanked you for coming to the establishment.

You didn’t say a word, quickly shooting a glance over your shoulder at the two-person table. Kyle still obliviously waiting for your return. You felt a burning lump in your throat, tears pricking at your eyes as you couldn’t bear to watch. You were setting up this man’s beautiful heart to be broken. All because you were scared of what actual love felt like, having been denied it for so long.

You swiftly left, already beginning to hiccup, and blinked back your tears. You didn’t want him to see you abandoning him through the windows, so you shot up into the sky and began to fly back home.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

“They’re just in the bathroom, they’ll be out in a minute.” Kyle smiled up at the waitress as she served your food across from him. Once she left, he softly muttered to himself, “Hopefully…” before glancing over at the bathroom with a small sigh. He held his hands together in his lap, trying to calm himself down. It had been 24 minutes. Kyle didn’t know what had happened to you.

Maybe you were having stomach issues? But how could they have been so bad that it kept you almost 30 minutes in the restroom? The worst idea that he had popped up in his head was that you had gotten hurt in the bathroom and needed dire help. But that one was also the most unlikely, so he pushed it to the back of his head.

It’s been 32 minutes since you announced that you needed the restroom, he didn’t want the food to get cold. He took a small bite of it, surely he could explain once you got back that he didn’t want to eat cold food that had originally been served warm.

It’s been an hour and 3 minutes since you had left. Kyle had eaten part of his food, not even half of it. He was too worried about what had happened to you. Why you left him. He looked at the plate of perfectly untouched food that was probably cold now.

He was holding his face in his hands, wondering what he had done wrong to make you have this reaction, when the waitress approached him and asked about the bill.

“It looks like I’ll be the one paying f’ it huh?” He responded, defeated. He took the bill from her, quickly speaking up before she left him alone. “And can I get two boxes f’ these?” She responded with a yes and a nod.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

It wasn’t that difficult for him to find your address, he had just asked through the grapevine of people he knew definitely were in contact with you. He knew how creepy it was, but he just wanted to make sure you had gotten your uneaten food. That’s all.

Kyle landed outside of your townhouse, walking up the steps and knocking on your door. He hoped you at least had made it home safe.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

You were still sniffling from your crying session. You felt like such a fool for leaving what seemed to be a perfect man in the dark like that. You felt so many emotions all at once, even as you tried to compose yourself in your pajamas, and snuggled up in your bed as some pitiful attempt of physically comforting yourself. Shame, embarrassment, fear, confusion, helplessness, and frustration with yourself.

You nearly gasped in horror when you heard a knock on your front door. Tears rushed to your eyes, that stupid look you always developed when you were about to cry made its way to your face again. You waited, hoping, praying that whoever it was would just leave you alone.

But it came again, somewhat more frantic than the first time. It felt oddly like a ‘worried’ knock. You sighed, grabbed another tissue, and lazily tried to clean yourself up, this person wasn’t going, were they?

You got out of bed, your wings slightly twitching as they stretched out. They had been stuck in a position that was slightly wrapped protectively around you as you were crying. Your wing muscles were aching, and it took you up until now to notice how stressed they were.

Shuffling down the stairs, you just wanted to be left alone which was why you didn’t bother to look out the windows by your front door.

Your front door opened, Kyle felt relieved that you were okay, you nearly got a heart attack when you saw him on your front step. Here come those tears, already severely blurring your vision, obscuring his worried face once he saw you begin to cry at the mere sight of him.

“You kind of forgot your food, love…” He softly chuckled and handed you a styrofoam box, your shaky hands taking it. “You alright…? ‘M sorry if it was anything I said that made you feel the need to-” “I-I’m sorry…” You whimpered out through trembling breaths and uncontrolled hiccups.

Kyle looked at you, his eyes growing sympathetic as he watched how you just crumbled right in front of him. It made him want just to hold you, cup the back of your head, and whisper into your ear ‘It’ll be okay’.

“I-I’m sorry for-... for just leaving you like that!” You desperately explained, your tears now already rolling down your face, down your cheeks, and down your neck. You didn’t know where to put your take-out box so you just awkwardly held it as you used one hand to wipe at your face.

He looked at you, taking a small breath before stepping into your home and gently taking the box from you. He set it down on a nearby table where you kept your shoes and a vase of flowers. Then he turned back to you and gingerly took your hands in his, looking into your red, puffy, watery eyes.

“It’s alright, love, I forgive you… but there must’ve been a reason you did it…” He was gentle with his words, they felt like a hug almost. “Was there…?”

You sniffled and glanced up at him as you thought of an explanation. “I-I guess I’m just… just afraid of actual love…? As stupid as it sounds…” you sniffled, your shoulders quivering along with your breaths as you tried to calm down. You gave a small awkward, kind of desperate laugh.

Kyle softly chuckled, “‘Fraid of love…? That sounds awful…” he would gently plant a light peck against your knuckles. “How long have you had philiphobia…?” he asked with a small smile. This time, you let out a real laugh. Small, but real. “What’s that…?”

“The irrational fear of love…” His words were so smooth, soft, and velvety as he said that. It felt strange, but like a strange comfort, almost. You took some time to think. “Well, I’m not exactly terrified of it… more like, I’m just unnerved by the prospect of it…”

“Still, how long have you been bothered by it…?” You really started to dig deep into your memory, trying to figure out where it all began.

“I guess… I guess when people started to make a big deal about getting into relationships… I suppose all the way back in elementary, I just wanted nothing to be loved… romantically loved. I never really got that, in any of my school years, and now I’ve just… kind of grown distant to the idea of being loved…?”

“And yet you still reach out for it, love. You’re in the dating pool, you still want love…”

“Yeah… I guess I do…” you mumbled to yourself. He looked at you, moving a bit of hair that had stuck to your face via crying. “Mind if I show you just a little bit…? Not a kiss, but I still want to give you the romantic love you desire…”

You paused, in thought, debating internally on whether or not you accept his proposal. Maybe it was time you did something you were afraid of. I mean, exposure therapy is there for a reason, right?

You give him a small nod, and you see him light up like a warm candle, a comforting light within the cold darkness of night. He then opened up his wings and proceeded to wrap them around you, pulling you closer to him. His coffee-brown feathers gently brushed and rubbed against your ivory ones. He then held you closer with his own arms.

Those muscular arms that silently screamed, ‘I will protect you with every fiber of my being’. One hand resided at one of your shoulder blades and the other cusped against the back of your head.

You both stayed like that for a bit. And you finally let yourself just be. Just be in love. Just relax into the comfort of the loving embrace of one harpee to another. Your eyelids would begin to droop shut, your body relaxing in the warmth of Kyle’s love. You could hear it, in the way he breathed, that he was smiling once he felt you relax into him.

“How’s this, love…?”

“...I like it.”

“You sure? You just like it?” He quietly chuckled.

“Yeah… I love it.” ───♡───────────── End