#i've been debating really hard on what to do with them tbh

[yourmidnightlover]

getting it over with - ch 1

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

summary: after relentless teasing and being the butt of too many jokes, you ask bucky to help you become more experienced in… a particular area of your life

warning: precious bucky, virgin shaming?, virgin reader, slight male!oc x reader, sexual harrassment, illuding to sex, talk of sex

w/c: 2.5k

a/n: i am working on part 2 in my other series, timeless. i've been debating two different ways i could take it and it's been an internal battle trying to figure that out. that being said, i can't help myself and started writing this and so here it is! this will likely be a simple mini series with smut in the later parts, probably the next one tbh. anywho... enjoy!

another night with the girls, and yet another night of beng singled out and ridiculed over a miniscule part of your life. 

you were a well accomplished woman and yet all of your hard work has consistently been overlooked in nearly every conversation because of your extracurricular activities. or, well, more like your lack of extracurricular activities. 

you had been working with the avengers for five years now as their pr manager, living there for a little over three after finding it was easier to represent and present the team in a brighter light when you knew more about them. it was after you moved in that you got much closer to james ‘bucky’ barnes, who you’ve coined the nickname of ‘jamie’ for. your friends also began to question why you hadn’t, in their terms, “banged,” one of the avengers you happened to live with.

truth be told, you did enjoy spending time with them, especially bucky. but, that would be crossing a line. you were practically employed by them. well, technically you were employed by tony, but that didn’t change the fact that they were your clients. it was just particularly easy to find the good in the people who constantly saved the world. well, that, and you were supposed to make them look good anyway. 

the most difficult one to paint in the golden light was definitely bucky. you were great at getting the media to lean into his humanity and reminding them of how he had been tortured into what he became. you’ve imagined him to the public as “sargeant bucky barnes,” giving him back the title he earned rather than the name he was branded. he was still wary of venturing into the eye of the public, but everytime he did there were less people yelling at him and more people giving pitying looks and whispers. sure, he would rather not be recognized at all, but whispering was a hell of a long way from harassment. 

bucky was grateful for everything you’d done for him. truth be told, you were grateful for everything they had done for you anyway. hell they had repeatedly saved all of humanity, helping their reputation was the least you could do for them. 

but regardless of how well of a job you’ve done making the avengers’ reputation way lighter, somehow the only thing your old friends could talk about is how you’re somehow still a virgin.

“god, i can’t believe you’re still a virgin sometimes. especially being surrounded by hunks like him,” stephanie spoke up as she flipped her bleached hair behind her shoulder. “i would’ve tried my luck long before i cleared their name, girl. i mean, that sergeant guy has the prettiest blue eyes, and have you never wondered what he could do with that metal hand of his?” 

you rolled your eyes, “he’s more than a pretty face, steph. he’s actually really sweet, too. his humor’s a bit old, kinda like a grandpa.”

“well, if he’s a grandpa then i’d gladly be his sugar baby,” she squeaked as she sipped on her vodka cranberry. 

“can we not talk about him like that?” your face furrowed in embarrassment and you only hoped that she would take your blushing as remnants of the alcohol running through your body.

“why?” she scoffed as she rolled her eyes. “do you want him or something?” she paused, seeingly waiting for your response. clearly, your silence was answer enough. “oh my god you like him, don’t you?” 

“no, no, it’s not like that,” you shook your head as you downed the rest of your drink. “i just spend a lot of time with him because of the job, y’know?” 

“why don’t you just get him to pop your precious cherry?” she ventured as she stood from her stool. 

boy, had you wished for that. mostly in your wildest dreams, but part of you hoped it could maybe happen. but then, you would wake up and were reminded of your place in the world. besides, jamie was over 100 years old. there’s no way he’d want someone who didn’t know what they were doing in the bedroom. 

“or,” steph interrupted your thoughts. “we can get out there and find you a different guy to pop your cherry,” she finished with a wink as she grabbed your hands, pulling you from your seat and to the dance floor. 

you managed to sneak a glance at the clock before the crowd surrounding you made it more difficult, reading the time being 11 pm. you told the guys you’d be back before 1, so that gave you enough time to please stephanie and then politely excuse yourself. 

surprisingly, you had begun to enjoy yourself. the music wasn’t so bad with the surge of confidence the alcohol running through your veins gave you. after a few too many drinks, you were in your own world. finally unbothered by the nagging thoughts of your friends and the weight of your job on your shoulders. 

you felt a gentle tap on your shoulder before turning to see a sweet smile. he had big, brown eyes and shaggy hair, broad shoulders, none that compared to the men you lived with, but they were nice nonetheless. 

“hi,” he said even sweeter than his smile, keeping his hands to himself politely. “i-i’m noah.”

“well, hello, noah,” you smiled as you stepped closer to him, uncharacteristically throwing your arms around his neck as you continued to sway to the music. “y/n.”

“i-uh-you-you’re gorgeous,” he stuttered as his hands modestly found your waist.

“you really think so?” you said teasingly before leaning up to his ear. “i think you are super cute, yourself.” 

at this point, you had nearly forgotten all about stephanie’s presence at all. maybe she had already left with another guy, herself? who knows. right now, all you knew was that you didn’t know brown eyes could be so pretty. mayb you didn’t want to wait anymore. maybe you didn’t want to be the old virgin in your friend group anymore. maybe noah could change that.

“you’re unreal,” he chuckled as he continued to sway with you for the next song until you began to kiss on his neck. 

“you taste so sweet,” you commented in his ear before kissing right below it. he pulled back, giving you a sweet smile before connecting your lips together. 

“you taste sweeter, believe me,” he huffed out a breath as you reconnected your lips with his. 

“i think i want you, noah,” you whispered against his lips so softly he wasn’t sure he even heard you. “pretty please?” 

“ye-yea, sure,” he guided you out of the bar, you needing nearly all of his support to even walk out of the threshold of the door. 

“think ‘m sleepy, noah,” you mumbled against his neck as the cold air hit your face, as if it had began to sober you up.

“you just said you wanted me…?” he perplexed as he pulled you aside into the ally to gather yourself. 

“‘m sorry, noah,” you shrugged as the cold air hit you again. “‘s cold outside, can i go back in?” you turned to walk back inside when he grabbed your arm, probably a bit more harsh than he intended to. 

“what the fuck?” he sounded disappointed. “i complimented you, i let you make the first move, and now you just wanna back out?” he pulled you closer to his body. “what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“i-i dunno, i just got confused i think?” you stumbled as you tried to back away once more. “it’s too cold out here, noah.” 

“maybe this’ll warm you up,” he grabbed your pliable face and brought you back in for a kiss before you tried to push him away again.

“y/n?” you heard a raspy voice call out. “what the fuck?” you turned to see your jamie confused.

“jamie!” you tred to wiggle out of noah’s grasp once more, a disgruntled look on your face as you did so. “jamie…” you were now limply wrestling out of noah’s grasp as he scoffed at the situation in front of him. 

“what?” he said in disbelief. “you wanna lead me on and leave with this guy?”

“noah-”

“i think you need to back of the lady, alright, man?” bucky spoke up as he stepped closer towards you. “she’s clearly a bit drunk, just let me take her home and we’ll be on our way. no harm, right?” he tried to reason with the douchebag. 

“no harm?” he grasped your arm tighter before he continued, making you wince slightly. “so this bitch is able to fucking lead me on and then leave me high and dry and there’s ‘no harm’?”

“okay, i’ve tried to be nice about this,” without a second of hesitation, he had noah’s arms behind his back, not enough to seriously injure him, but just enough to harm him enough to not tempt him to do any more harm. “you will apologize to miss y/n for talking to her the way you did, you will walk away, and you won’t do anything like that to any woman in the near future, understood?” noah nodded. “am i understood?!” 

“yes, yes!” bucky nudged him further in your direction as you were leaning your back against the brick wall for stability. “i’m sorry, y/n.”

“for…?” bucky taunted.

“i’m sorry for talking to you the way i did.”

“good boy,” bucky teased as he released the man, letting him run away and not sparing him another glance before he made his way closer to you. 

“‘m sorry, jamie,” you stumbled forward and threw your arms around him. you had never been so openly affectionate, especially with bucky since you knew his aversions. since you were so drunk, you simply didn’t register the unspoken boundaries you had unintentionally set in place for yourself. “didn’t wanna make him mad. jus’ changed my mind s’all,” you buried your face in his neck. 

“you have a right to change your mind, doll,” he soothed as he gently rubbed your back, leading you to steve’s car he borrowed. 

“y/n?” you snapped your head to look at bucky as he spoke. “i don’t want you to be so late again, doll. it’s almost 2 am. had me worried sick about ya,” his hand danced on your knee, you assumed to comfort you after the events of the night.

“i didn’t know,” you shook your head. “i swear, i just lost track of time. s’not like me to do this. i just got so mad and wanted to get it over with, y’know?”

“get what over with?”

“you won’t laugh at me?” you grabbed his hand that was resting on your knee and turned in your seat to face your body towards him. “never, doll,” he chuckled at your serious tone.

“i’m tired of bein’ a virgin,” you said with a sense of disappointment. “don’ want people makin’ fun of me anymore.”

“that’s nothing to be embarrassed about, doll,” he shook his head as he put the car in park before running to your side of the car and helping you out. “some people want to save that moment, i get it.”

“no,” you groaned as you leaned into him. “i don’t wanna save it. i was just scared at first, and then i didn’t want to, and now it’s too late because nobody wants to be with a virgin.”

“that’s not true, y/n,” he shook his ehad as he pressed your shared floor on the elevator. 

“would you wanna have sex with me?” you wondered aloud as bucky began coughing loudly. “don’t be mean,” you huffed and crossed your arms, figuring he was trying to hide his laugh. “steph said i should get you to ‘pop my cherry’ but i knew you would’t wan-”

“hey, that’s not what i meant,” he stopped your train of thought. 

“so you do wanna ‘pop my cherry’?” you awed at the man as the elevator doors opened. 

“i wan’ you to stop referencing it as ‘popping your cherry’,” he grimaced as he said it himself. 

“you wanna have sex with me? bang? do the deed? take my virginity? make love?”

“stop it,” he groaned as you giggled, leaning into his chest even more. “i wanna have this conversation when your sober, if you even remember it.”

“i’ll remember, my sweet jamie,” you held onto his arm as he walked you to your room, helping you get into bed before going into your bathroom and returning with your bin of skincare. “this is why you’re my sweet jamie,” if you didn’t know any better you’d think he was blushing. 

he began using your makeup wipes to remove the remnants of makeup that had survived the night, followed by micellar water to remove the excess remover from your face. you knew he had seen you do your skincare routine after having so many late movie nights with one another, but it was still flattering that he had remembered it all so well. he finished applying your toners, serums, and finally your moisturizer with gentle hands, his metal one providing a nice cold surface that woke your skin up a bit more. it wasn’t until you reached up to grab his flesh hand that he noticed the bruises lacing your arms. 

“god,” he sighed as he looked down at his lap. “i’m so sorry i was too late, doll.”

“you weren’t too late,” you shook your head at his negativity. “you were perfectly on time. you saved me. i don’t-i don’t know what would’ve happened had you not shown up. i-”

“i don’t wanna think about what could’ve happened, please,” he shook his head as he held onto your bruised wrist softly, tenderly rubbing his cool metal hand over the damaged skin before pressing a kiss to it. 

“will you stay with me tonight?” you asked softly, as if you were scared he would say no. as if he would ever tell you no. 

“only if you’re sure,” you nodded eagerly with a grin before he crawled into bed with you. 

bucky’s arms wrapped around your waist as you laid on his chest, breathing in his scent as his soothing heartbeat calmed you down after the nights antics. 

“i’ll remember tomorrow, jamie.”

CHAPTER 2

[floofanflurr]

Thoughts on Asgore? Just curious since a lotta people are divided on "divorced haha man" and "mass murderer"

Ohohoho this is very much a slippery slope for me! And a topic I have many opinions on. Thanks for the ask!

Please note for anyone that does not have the energy to read something like this, that this is overall, a critical piece of Asgore. (though not shamelessly bashing him.)

I'm prefacing this to anyone reading - I am not looking to fight, and I will not engage in any arguments around this. I don't have the energy to engage like that. I will delete/block any comments looking to start an argument and move on.

So here's my character analysis of Asgore under the cut, and my personal feelings about goat dad.

Asgore and his incomplete character arc, and why he honestly kind of got shafted:

I think Asgore is an interesting character, but I just... really struggle to like him.

"But Floo!" you may say "Why do you like Undyne, and the other monsters that killed/hurt Frisk/the other kids but not Asgore? Why is he different?"

I debated on that long and hard myself for a while. Why does Asgore rub me the wrong way when Undyne doesn't? Could it be because he is the reason everyone else is doing what they are, because he ordered it? But no, that didn't feel quite right.

And then I realized that it's because Asgore never truly grew as a person. There are some fics out there that I've read where I really do like Asgore. He's a fuzzy goat dad, and I just adore him! But when I examined the differences between those fics and canon, that's when it really stood out to me about WHY I don't like him in canon.

Every other character in the game gets growth that was (while caused by your/frisk's actions) still decided on by themselves. Let's go in order of the decisions these characters made that showcased their growth (in a pacifist run)-

Toriel - She, after having been given suitable time to ruminate, realizes that what she is doing will not work and tears herself out of her isolation to go after the last child and protect them. Her passivity wasn't saving anyone, so she changes herself, grows, and goes to protect them. (it's late, but it DOES happen)

Papyrus - I think the place he really shines in a pacifist/neutral run is when he beats Frisk 3 times and lets them go, but his character arc is all the same, anyway, even if you do beat him. Namely, that he lets them go. He could keep going, he could keep fighting, but he realizes that his want for friends and fame wasn't worth hurting someone. (even if that's not directly how he phrases it.)

Even if you outlast him and beat him the traditional way, he still decides to use his last special attack instead of fighting you until you're down. It's pretty clear he could have kept going if he wanted to.

Undyne - She, like Papyrus (and almost every other monster) has the character growth of letting Frisk go. A decision she actively makes. When Frisk saves her in hotland, pouring water over her head, she could have continued on with the chase, and kept going. But she didn't - she was honorable and conceded her defeat.

Mettaton - Same song and dance as Papyrus and Undyne (I love this character growth, and that's not to diminish ANYONES. They all have different flavors and motivations for going after Frisk that need confronted, even if the action is similar.) But he lets frisk go and realizes that the people underground need him more than anyone above ground. And also learns to touch base with his family a bit more, and value his friends/family more.

Alphys - Alphys decides to confront her crimes and reveal herself! There's still a bit of external pressure here (the "I KNOW WHAT YOU DID" note from Flowey) but still, she didn't have to come clean. But despite everything, she did, and she faced her wrongdoings and also told the people she loved.

Flowey - Do I need to explain this one? There's so many character essays on him (and Alphys tbh LMAO) Long story short, he learns to move on and let go. (and also broke the barrier and released the souls)

So now we move to the crux of the issue. Asgore.

He had a HELL of a character arc building up! So many flaws and bad decisions! We know he's kind, and a pushover, but also responsible for all of this hurt and death of children. (Yes, he had reasons, but that doesn't change his actions.) To be honest, it's the kind of character arc I love. Someone who has caused harm, learning to grow and be a better person. (Cough cough, Heart on the Table, cough cough)

...But he never actually got to the "better person" part.

We know monsters in Undertale are flawed. It's why it's such a great game! So many characters have done so much bad, but! The core of the game is that anyone can be a good person if they try! Look at all these people learning and growing, and being better people than they were before!

But the true pacifist ending kinda shafted Asgore, to be honest. He's a coward, and he never really has to face what he's done. He never decides to just... stop. To face his crimes and the world he's shaped around him.

If he had, independently of others, decided to spare Frisk, that would be one thing. But he didn't - it wasn't until Toriel showed up, and then all of Frisk's friends that he stopped.

Asgore's core conflict was that he was doing something he hated and he knew was bad, but he couldn't stop because how would everyone else react? His people needed him to do this bad thing.

A completed character arc for him, from a story telling perspective, would have had him stop what he was doing, while still under the impression that this would be a hard decision, and that everyone would hate him for it.

(A bed he made for himself! Through his action and inaction, he stoked monsterkind's hatred for humanity back up. There is a much larger discussion to be had around this topic, also how Chara was treated by him and monster kind (also his hand in Chara and Asriel's death) and many more factors. I am aware this is a highly debated topic, and I don't have the energy to fight it, so I will leave it at that.)

Regardless on if you agree if that would be a good or bad decision on his part, that would have been character growth - basically, Asgore having to face all of the accumulation of his cowardice and actions.

But he didn't. He didn't back down until he was basically told "hey yeah, so we all like this kid so you don't have to kill them."

He never wanted to kill them! That was never the issue! The issue was that he was willing to kill them anyway. And if Frisk's friends and his ex wife hadn't shown up and said "hey so we actually DONT want you to kill this kid" he would have! He was willing to kill a child because other people wanted him to, and we never get to see him overcome that hurdle of not killing a child despite other people wanting him to.

We can talk about the potential ending where he offers Frisk his soul, but even then, he still never actually confronts his actions. He's still unwilling to face all of the people he's harmed. (and YES allowing and ENCOURAGING his citizens to murder children is harming them, too. Especially because monsters don't see humans as people. (another essay I don't have time to get into right now, but is based on canon fact))

So... Yeah. I think Asgore has a lot of wonderful conflict baked into him, which is something I love in a character. He's torn, and a coward, and a father, and a broken ruler and king who is doing what he thinks his people want. But it's frustrating to me because he never got the character arc he deserved, and never got the chance to grow into a better person like everyone else in Undertale gets.

I do actually enjoy writing about him... and drawing him too on occasion! (though he's hard to draw) and ASGORE and Bergentrückung are actually my favorite songs in the soundtrack since they are filled with so much emotion. He really is a delightfully conflicted character and that conflict and hurt and pain in a character is addicting to me.

If he had a resolved character arc in game... well, to be honest, he'd probably be my favorite character??? Like, maybe even more than Papyrus (before the hyperfixation took hold, of course. That's a beast you can't reason with.)

But alas, it is what it is, and Asgore never grew. He's stuck being the same monster he was from the very beginning.

Thanks again for the ask and sorry you got a whole ass essay in response lol! I have many feelings about this game and the characters in it, Asgore included.

(Also, to anyone reading, I am aware what I have stated is simply my opinion, and many people have different ones. My opinion has no more value than any other persons.)

Another disclaimer - I love Undertale, and all of it's characters and everything that went into it, and while there are things that I feel about Asgore's character arc, I love and appreciate the way the game played out in actuality, and I wouldn't change a thing about it. Toby wrote a masterpiece, and is not only allowed, but should write characters the way he wants to. Who cares if it's not textbook?

Have a cookie for making it this far:

🍪

(I was gonna drop an Asgore sketch but HOLY HECK it was not cooperating.)

[destinyc1020]

I loved your review of Challengers!!!! I watched the movie 3 times now and although I love the vibes the film gave me, I had big issues with the script and overall's Tashi's arc. I felt that the male characters were more interesting as ppl and their story of a close friendship turned rivalry to ending with both of them not speaking for years was quite compelling. I honestly just thought Tashi was a symbol for them tbh. this is where I blame the writer Justin cause the reason he made Tashi black was because he was inspired by Serena and Naomi Osaka however, this film is very apolitical. Outside of the mention of the alleged racist tennis opponent, her race is never mentioned. Her black father isn't even present in the older Tashi scenes. So what was the point of taking such good care of her white boys' line?

The last point is not going to be a point but a link. It discusses how Zendaya is the next leading lady of the generation. I have some thoughts but I hope you can read it so we can discuss. I do think that one critic has some inflammatory comments on Z that I feel are more personal than biased, but as a dark-skinned black woman, I can understand where that frustration comes from. It is tough because it is a lot and I appreciate if you do want to add any more discourse because I do feel Z sometimes is separated apart because she biracial black woman the bigger issue is Hollywood as an entity but using that white boy line kinda justify it for me.

https://www.vulture.com/article/zendaya-challengers-leading-lady-debate.html

Whew!!! Anon....this was a very deep and interesting read! Thank you for your kind words Anon about my review. Like I said, I'm always 100% honest on here about how I feel lol. 😄

I'll just say this, that overall, people are going to have varying opinions on someone's acting or just a film in general. I look at films and an actor's performance as just something that is subjective.... One person may LOVE a film or an actor's performance, and another person may think the film/acting was just "So-so". It's just like a piece of art. We can all have various different tastes, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that necessarily? Sometimes, our life experiences, exposure, and world view can shape how we view certain films or pieces of art. So, I am not even surprised that one of the critics in this article doesn't really care for Z's acting/films, etc... It's her personal opinion I guess.... 🤷🏾‍♀️

I'm a little iffy as well on Justin's writing tbh.... I remember when leaks of the script/screenplay FIRST came out, people were cringing lol. 😅 I'm glad that the film version wasn't as cringe-worthy as some people felt the film would be. I still would have changed some things about the writing.

But hey, sometimes, you don't need a picture-perfect film with picture-perfect characters. Sometimes, life is complicated, PEOPLE are complicated, and you don't need an ending that's tied neatly into a nice little bow with a "happily ever after" attached.

With that said, I'll comment and provide my reaction to some of the points in the article you just linked:

Whew... Welp...She made some interesting points. I know this will probably ruffle a few feathers here, but she's definitely coming in with some hard-hitting thoughts and feelings.

I've been saying this about Hollywood for years... The fact that monoracial, YOUNG, desirable, darker-skinned black women are basically ignored in Hollywood.... I do agree with her statements on this. I am a huge supporter of Z, and I love that she has the type of power that she has in Hollywood, but I do also feel for my darker-hued sisters as well. 😔

With regards to race.... Don't get me wrong, I don't need films where black people (black women especially) have to address RACE in every single role that is given a black person. Is it just me?? But sometimes, it's just REFRESHING to watch a movie, see a black person onscreen, and NOT have to think about race. 👀 We already have to deal with race and think about it just about every single day, 24/7... That can at times be exhausting. Sometimes, when you watch movies, you just want to ESCAPE...Escape your problems, escape reality, escape real life, or just escape what's on your mind atm, etc... You don't need a constant reminder of societal issues, and views of "blackness" in every single film that features a black person. At least, I don't feel that way.

But I do feel like certain elements and ways that woc (black women in particular) are portrayed onscreen DO play a huge role in how we are viewed in society, how we view ourselves, and how certain stereotypes are continuously perpetuated. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Anyway, I still hate that "white boys" line lol. It just seemed cringe to me, and totally out of nowhere lol. 😅 I'm like, do people even talk like that in REAL life? I doubt it lol.

Hmmm....interesting take.... 🤔

.

I meannnnn....I DO have to agree w/her statement on Timmy and Zendaya in the "Dune" franchise. I sense more platonic/"Friendship" chemistry btwn them, than actual sexual or sensual chemistry tbh. 👀

Whereas, I felt like she and Josh definitely seemed to have tangible sexual chemistry onscreen in "Challengers". Sometimes, you can know someone a little TOO well, that when you act with them in romantic scenes, it's not really believable because you two are like brother and sister vibes irl with each other lol. 🤣 I think that's the case w/Timmy and Zendaya onscreen.

.

While I don't agree with her that black people should ONLY work with mostly other black people onscreen lol, I will say that I agree with her part highlighted above. I've been saying for a while now that I'm really curious to see how Z would fare in a film directed by a black director, surrounded by a primarily black cast. 😊

.

With all of this said, I have to admit, this little part right here made me smile...

I can see it too! The Academy LOOOVES indie films like these. 😊😃

Anyway, great read Anon! 👍🏾 Thanks for sharing! It was good to get dual sides of the coin from their differing opinions.

[g-xix]

just want to say a massive congrats on your results!!!

🥹🥹🥹

Thank you man i seriously appreciate it

ibfr

since getting results ive done the whole emotional rollercoaster of crying, going on mental health walks, reconnecting with nature.... I feel so absolutely self-pitying and neglectful and unappreciative of my results saying this, but whilst knowing i did so well - knowing that the one person i wanted to make proud and impress and i practically tried to get these grades for, isn't proud and is acc disappointed...?

Im hurting so bad right now

Slow mental and emotional ache, nothing physical, barely even emotions or mental tbh. It just taints everything so hard.

Again, sound so negative nancy and i appreciate every single one of you congratulating me. I just genuinely feel so dejected because the one person i worked for doesn't care about the output and end result.

Don't even know what i can do about it atp. I've tried to apologise for something that isn't my fault, they've... apologised(? debatable really), but still I've been moved to crying by them, and they just don't like me.

Rough days in the g-xix mindscape these days

[perhaps-in-anotherdream]

Hi:) I made a post with the same questions I'm about to put in here, but then deleted it since I thought I'll be guaranteed to get an answer if I just ask you.

I've been playing MLQC since its launch. To be honest, haven't kept up with the story in years and only continue playing and logging in to get Shaw's cards, but I do know how the game works like the back of my hand.

A few days ago I saw Sylus for the first time on X, and the minute I did I began to debate whether or not I should install Love and Deepspace. Just so I can see what he's like. He's very attractive, and he seems charismatic and mysterious too lol

However, before I decide to download and make a potential commitment, I want to know a few things first. 99% of my questions are general questions, while the other 1% isn't :P

What's the game like? (gameplay, mechanics, options, daily tasks(?), currencies, gacha, etc.)

Are there similarities to MLQC? (gameplay-wise, content, dailies, wish tree, events, etc.)

The cards come with stories, right? I honestly feel stupid asking this, but I'm just that clueless about the game and how it works lolol

Is the game F2P-friendly? (tolerable grinding, fairness in stocking up on required materials, cost of cards, etc.) Is it at least similar to MLQC in terms of abundance in materials and currency?

Do limited cards get re-runs? Or is it that once a card is launched and its event ends, the chance to get it is forever gone?

Can cards only be pulled, or can they also be run in MLQC-style shoot/birthday events and bought using in-game currency (i.e. like the gems in MLQC)?

There's probably a grade to the cards, correct? (SR, SSR, UR, etc.)

I saw on the store that Sylus's 'Wish' event is ongoing at the moment; will his card be added permanently after the event ends, or is this a one-time thing (like the time ltd. Wish Tree events in MLQC)?

Taking into consideration the fact that I'll be a noob with barely any resources, if at all: do I have a chance of getting Sylus's card before the event end if I begin playing soon?

Sorry for all the questions, and thank you for your response in advance :D

hello! firstly i’m sorry but my answers will only have necessary info b/c i’m not in the physical or mental state to go at lengths rn.

(1) it's an otome with action elements i.e. different styles of combats. there's also main story, dates, socmed, mini games, photo booth etc.

(2) idk whether to laugh or cry here tbh. in all fairness, PG really just took every feature of lovepro/ MLQC and upgraded them in LaDS (the combats aside LOL). although personally i don’t have anything positive to say on their writing quality, so you’ll have to figure out your feelings on that yourself ahah.

the dailies are quick once you've been there long enough as it is with most games. the wish tree has pity carry over system. they have two types of gacha pools: permanent and limited. and the two pools have different ticket currencies. there is no exchange system for event cards like MLQC.

leveling up the cards is an extremely tricky business here by the way. it's gonna become an essay if i try to explain, but know that you can never have enough stamina here LOL.

(3) yes. the 5 and 4 stars.

(4) nope lmfao. even if you tunnel vision one bias, it'd be difficult have all his cards without spending. they do have free 5 and 4 star card events though and those give rewards + the limited events often offer some rewards (in-game), but still it'd be hard if you have crappy gacha luck plus their stupid 50/50 choice in the pool almost never works lol and since the game is a simulpub, you won't have the advantage you have with MLQC to plan out your spending.

a friend of mine has done an overview, so please go through that to get an idea: ♡

(5) give it some time 😂 the game is only six months old. eventually all limited cards are re-run in these sort of games.

(6) no, there's no currency only card like MLQC in the game (at least not as of now). all cards are to be obtained through gacha (free ones aside).

(7) yes.

(8) QinChe/ Sylus has multiple events going on at the moment. there's a limited pool that ends on august 1 and you won't be able to get that one after the event until further notice. and the permanent pool also has a limited mechanism right now that will end after the event. but every other card except for event limited card will be added to the permanent pool afterwards.

(9) the permanent cards can be obtained later too (though definitely will be way harder b/c the limited mechanism for the permanent pool will gone then). as for the limited banner, it depends on your luck 😂 70x is the pity for 5-stars. i can't remember if there was any newbie pity, but since there's no guarantee or exchange, it might prove hard to obtain the card without spending if you have bad gacha luck. :/

hope these answer your questions~

—

[strawberrystepmom]

I have two zodiac-based questions (but not horoscope explanations like you've been doing), the first is dependent on whether or not you've watched Fairy Tail. (I'll send a separate ask)

The second: if you were to assign ONE anime character to best exemplify the different zodiac signs, who would you pick? (Can be from any anime of your choice, and they don't all have to be from the same anime, but you can only pick ONE).

Alternatively you could pick two, but they have to be based on the month divide (social media tells me there's a different between June and July Cancers (and obviously the others, but we're in Cancer season lol)?).

Feel free to answer in your own time, or completely ignore it.

ALRIGHT! this has been such a fun task to complete and I cannot thank you enough for asking me such a thoughtful question. I really have pondered on this for days just to be certain I have it as right as I want it to be.

Aries: Akitaru Obi - Fire Force

reason: embodies most of the natural traits of Aries as a sign. motivated, hard working, friend and family oriented. willing to put in the work to get done what he needs to get done. he trains every day for this!

Taurus: Gon Freecss - HxH

reason: aside from being boy of All Time, Gon to me embodies everything a Taurean is at their best. loyal, digging their heels in when it matters the most, giving it all but also understanding the joy in laying on your back and watching the clouds roll by.

Gemini: Itachi Uchiha - Naruto

reason: literally the most stereotypical Gemini I can think of even down to his decision making processes. committed to the bit when he was ready to go all in, thought a lot about it before then, remains fluid in his decisions afterward although it comes from an altruistic and good place.

Cancer: Ichigo Kurosaki - Bleach

reason: truly every Cancer trait exists in this man in a way I've seen very seldom. he's loyal, emotional, compassionate, but he doesn't let it blind him and this is common for a lot of Cancer people once they can suss a situation out.

Leo: Bulma Briefs - DB/DBZ

reason: hot genius heiress and literally knows it. I feel like a simple look at her screams LEO so loudly I don't really need to explain.

Virgo: Kakashi Hatake - Naruto

reason: the first Virgo man to ever make me crazy gets to keep his title but mostly because of his internal thought processes. Kakashi's anxiety has been widely debated in fandom for many years but I've always firmly subscribed to the theory (and tbh fact if you read the manga but I digress) that is is wracked by it. he is loyal, he tends to be grounded but he questions himself. idk. just so Virgo it hurts down to this.

Libra: Joseph Joestar - JJBA

reason: please watch one episode of Battle Tendency to know more. I will not be defending this decision and you will come back to tell me I'm right.

Scorpio: L Lawliet - Death Note

reason: intelligent, intuitive, endearingly strange. he is the Scorpio pinkprint in the very best way.

Sagittarius: Asuka Langley-Soryu - NGE

reason: literally every Sagittarius stereotype exists in this lovely young woman and she does no wrong to me so it doesn't matter but she's brash, she's proud of herself, she gets done what she sets out to do.

Capricorn: Senku Ishigami - Dr. Stone

reason: work ethic alone. he is the most stereotypical Capricorn I can think of in any media depiction down to deep emotions and the way he views his comrades and the things he does for them to make a world they weren't meant to be in more comfortable for them. I LOVE U SENKU!!!

Aquarius: Suguru Geto - JJK

reason: even if he hadn't gone murderous over it, he is an Aquarius through and through, down to everything he does being for the whole rather than himself.

Pisces: Yuuta Okkotsu - JJK

reason: literally the Pisces stereotype. kind, compassionate, good to everyone, everyone eventually becomes family which is just sooooo deeply Piscean thanks to our ability to really tune in and be there for people. just so good. glad to be associated with him.

[birchbow]

How exactly do moirails work? I keep getting confused between what constitutes a matespiritship and moirailegence. I know that moirails are able to help sooth and calm but I feel that there is way more to moirails than just that and I’m having a hard time understanding.

Ahhh, well, this is one of those things that's really only defined in-comic in a fairly skeletal way, and the form it takes in fics is always going to be like 50% headcanon, minimum. And in my case probably more because I've been fascinated by the concept of non-sexual romance/intimacy for a long time and so I've written a LOT of pale content lol. SO here's some rambling about moiraillegiance, which I'm pre-emptively putting under a cut because I know myself.

First, a brief review. Pale-related things we get in the canon, at a quick top-of-my-head scan, are basically:

some trolls are a more emotionally unstable/violent and will find somebody who complements their personality and helps keep them from murderously flying off the handle.*

of the four quadrants of relationships trolls are expected to have, this is not a concupiscient (sexual) one** but it is a (positive emotions toward your partner) one, which Karkat and the narration frame as "pity" (see "****")

At one point, a scene that appears to be setting up for a death-match is defused by one party shh-ing the other one and patting their face until they calm down, from which fandom took 'shooshing" and 'papping' as terms, from the sound effects in those panels.***

talking about your thoughts and emotions is mentioned several times in the context of pale relationships****, and I believe at one point called a feelings jam although I don't have it in me to dig back and see if that one is canon

that is the canon stuff that occurs off the top of my head

*how much of the part where the narrative explains quadrants is biased (because of what a shitshow Alternia is) is up for debate **fandom interpretation varies on this from "having sex with your moirail is a huge taboo" to "it's totally fine, it's just not one of the quadrants the drones demand contributions for". ***And also where I (and quite a few other people I would guess) started thinking about trolls having separate, alien instincts and responses to stimuli that humans would find relatively unremarkable, like having their face patted or having somebody shush them ****Alternia aggressively punishes perceived weakness to the point that seeing another troll being vulnerable and not killing them for it is narrated as "pity" which is the closest we seem to get to an Alternian-culture concept of "love". ANYWAY that probably has a finger on the needle RE: how exclusive it is to ONLY talk to your moirail about your feelings, because they're in a relationship with you and therefore hopefully won't cull you for it.

Things that are NOT canon include: most of it lmao. If you wanted an itemized list of things in my Troll Society writing that were made up almost entirely whole cloth, we would be here all day. Moving on!

When it comes to writing pale vs flushed, I mostly go by vibes, tbh lol. I suppose if I had to organize my criteria a little bit,,, I am going to spitball. Bear with me.

Pale looks at its partner and goes "I see the things wrong with you, and instead of culling you for them, we are going to fix them" and also "the place where we both are is a place we're both steady and safe" (passive/steadying/protective),

and flush is more like. "I see the things wrong with you, and instead of culling you for them I'm suffering them with you" and also "the place where we both are is a place where we Want More" (active/passionate/aggressive I guess??? Can't find the word).

or to rephrase

pale->unpicking feelings, controlling violent impulse, steadying emotional state, physical touch to invite a sort of subspace-adjacent hazy alien-arousal-that's-not-arousal.

flush->passionate, intense, active attraction, sometimes kind of violent! sometimes too passionate for its own good! Physical touch to work each other up and drive each other higher in a positive way (hopefully) (mostly) (trolls are violent assholes tbh)

I DON'T KNOW DUDE there's no guide for this stuff lol. As evidenced above, canon basically has just like a skeleton framework, so we are all out here putting these lines down ourselves.

Making this more complicated: regardless of what the author of any given fic headcanons as the social norm, it also makes sense to me that there are variations in trolls just like in humans. I usually don't write my pale pairings fucking, but it seems reasonable and inevitable to me that some trolls would be into that! Or trolls who were attracted to concupiscient quads but didn't want to bone down, although that's dangerous and untenable for reasons mentioned in previous asks.

fig 1: Meenah and Kurloz's swinging back and forth² from the (hate+fucking) quadrant to the (love/pity+no fucking³) quadrant in PoF felt like it came naturally as I was writing, because what else are two of the oldest, most powerful trolls in the universe going to do, when each of them is the only person around who comes close to actually knowing the other enough to hate/pity?

²Switching back and forth between quadrants is actually called "vacillating" and seems to be a fairly common event in troll society and media--the blurring/combining pale and pitch that they're doing is the more scandalous part, according to general fanon ³I have always preferred to write pale relationships with a lot of the traits my culture associates with sexual relationships (nudity, intimacy, an industrial porn complex lol) but to cut the sex and leave the rest and play with that contrast. How much of that is because I'm personally not sexually attracted to people, and I'm deeply Emotions about a society recognizing that kind of relationship as crucial and desirable??? I mean idk boss y'all don't pay me for introspection lol.

ANYWAY that also means the boundaries of what any given troll defines as "too much intimacy not to be pale" or "the feelings you're talking to me about are too personal for this not to be pale" or "you're touching me in a way that seems pale (or flushed)" are going to be different, which makes this extra hard to answer. Example!!

When I write Kurloz, I write him with an old-fashioned and strict view of what quadrants entail, but also being too old and above too many laws and social norms to give much of a shit about whether he blurs those lines or not most of the time. The little nods to things like it being slutty In His Time to wear your hair short and show off the roots of your horns hopefully bring across some of the cranky old man vibes lmao.

VERSUS when I write Karkat, I'm writing a much younger guy who spends a ton of time thinking about relationships and watching romcoms, synthesizing his own very in-depth thesis of What Feelings Are--and also just coming from a much younger generation. He's not nearly as comfortable blurring the lines, but he also places those lines in very different spots than Kurloz does.

TBH follow your heart haha it's just an alien sandbox and we're all just slapping sand around.

[quigzahhutt]

8 (as unhinged as you can), 57, 58, 77

yessss im so excited

from the fanfiction ask game !

8 - Post an out-of-context spoiler from a WIP (as unhinged as I can)

hmm ok ok

George and Alex were currently bickering– no, have been bickering, for the last half an hour– the debate is something about a cuck chair? For some reason, both men are absolutely convinced one of them has to be plopped in The Chair™ while the other two fuck. Logan doesn't really understand why they can't just fuck him at the same time; its not like they haven't done that before. A while ago Logan had accidentally stumbled across George furiously jacking off Alex in the Williams motorhome. The pair fervently tried to shoo him away– which, first of all, rude; the motorhome is a shared space for both drivers– and second of all, well…  Logan may have ended up having sex with them. Both of them. At the same time.  It was messy and rushed and hardly even sex at all, but since then, the two older men have been absolutely enraptured by the young American. “Guys,” Logan tried to interrupt, “guys!” He shouted, eventually finally catching both men's attention, “what is the point of this argument at all? Couldn't I just be in the… cuck chair? If it's such a debate,” Logan grates out, overcome with embarrassment at the prospect of having to ask at all, “No–” both older men try to intervene at the same time, talking over each other. With a glare, George wins the battle and gains first speaking rights, “It just makes sense, no?,” the Brit said, his tone uneven and wonky, as if he's also embarrassed all the sudden, “Yeah, Loges, it's just the logical course of action,” Alex interrupts, gesturing with his hands “or it would be if someone wasn't being so difficult,” he says, sending a pointed look toward George. Logan could tell this was getting nowhere, and that both men were about to start arguing again, “What if you just... both have sex with me?” The youngest man states plainly; the two older men freeze, “What– did you guys not even consider that?” Logan huffs out in disbelief, “Well– we, um–” George begins, stuttering out syllable after syllable,

this is from an old logalex WIP I eventually abandoned; I was going for kind of a romantic comedy type thing but it just wasnt working out unfortunately :/ but maybe I'll finish it one day who knows

---

57 - how conscious are you of including symbolism or foreshadowing in your fics?

not too much tbh it just kind of happens as I go? sometimes I'll make a comparison or foreshadow something I think might happen as the season unfolds, but its not something I pay too much attention to in the grand scheme of things lol

---

58 - do you have a favorite piece of figurative language you've written?

ohhhhh this is a really good one, and I have been utilizing this a LOT in my recent works

The blanket on top of him seems to be the one he had seen thrown on the couch yesterday. It was soft– a dark navy with white threading frayed along the edges. It was obviously well loved, but it wasn't stringy or flattened; Logan clearly takes good care of it to balance out the overuse. There are loose smatterings of dog hair strewn over the surface of the fiber, embedded into the follicles, sticking out like fresh crops of black and brown grass; hints of a part of Logan's life he had never let Liam in on.

this is from my Liam/Logan fic (that I promise will be finished soon😭😭). I use a lot of figurative language in this fic specifically bcuz it's a lot more like... introspective than a lot of my other fics? but the visual of dog hair sticking out of the blanket like grass made me particularly teary and idk why😭😭 it's one of my favorite lines in the entire fic

---

77 - why do you enjoy writing fanfiction?

ohhh good question. I mean obviously as a form of creative expression but I feel like writing fanfic in particular is easier for me than just writing in general; I've always had a tricky relationship with creative expression because I have a hard time being artistic through typical means. Like, I can't just pick up a pencil and draw out an idea, it just wouldn't scratch it itch in my brain? I've always had to find more obscure forms of media to express myself in a way that feels satisfying. obviously writing and drawing are the big two main categories, but I can only ever express my creativity through hyper specific means of those forms, does that make sense?

I think I enjoy writing fanfic because it's creative, but in a more obscure way? it's about characters and people and it gives me a more strict guideline to follow so i don't get stuck on the tricky creative hurdles that make me lose motivation.

but I also enjoy writing fanfic because I know other people enjoy my work! not in a selfish way, but in the way of like... I'm providing content for a fanbase that other people consume. especially for like ships like sargebon or LiLo that are kind of more obscure; it makes me happy knowing im creating content for something that has a lack of it, if that makes sense?

[dallasurr]

i feel so hurt and upset about Simon he needed to heal too

i can't sleep at night sometimes

I know this is so random but i don't care i feel so hurt by the idea of everyone healing but him dead and bound to be forgetten. .. i want him feel good i want to get him out of there.

I've said this before but as much as I'd like to see the series to its planned end, I'm not that unhappy about not getting season 5. It would be really hard for me to see Amelia get a redemption or her exit when she went on the train as a fully mature adult in her 30s, and did wayyyy worse things than Simon did. Although she was mentally unstable at the time she got on the train, it doesn't seem like she had a history of mental illness before Alrick died.

What Simon did to Grace and Hazel was fucked up, I can wrap my head around his justification for killing Tuba and I'm not the person to debate about this bc I straight up didn't like Tuba. She went out of her way to kidnap and scare Grace and Simon, who would have probably found the exit to the car and went on their way the next day without her interference, and I'm of the opinion that she put both herself and Hazel in danger with her little prank. I know we wouldn't have a story without it, and it doesn't justify her death, but literally from their first interaction she showed Simon she can be hostile and dangerous. And while she warmed up to Grace (according to Grace lol I didn't see much friendly interaction between them at all, just Grace enjoying/admiring the way she interacted with Hazel), Simon always got attitude from her, I can't blame him for not warming up to her.

Simon might have been 18 at the time of his season but let's be honest, both he and Grace were very immature and justifiably so. They only had each other and their delusions for years and years before they became guardians themselves. The train has proven itself to be dangerous, and proved how high the stakes are when he died, but people act like he was a fucking monster for doing what he thought he needed to protect himself, grace and hazel from a perceived threat. He could have been a little more tactful with explaining what happened, or lied about it, but like tbh as a neurodivergent person myself who sees Simon as someone who is on the autism spectrum, I REALLY struggle with lying and deceiving people so I can understand why he just blurted out the truth without any thought.

I do think one of the most irredeemable things he did was dehumanize Grace and trap her in her memories, whether or not he knew it could kill her (I assume he didn't bc the Cat as usual didn't explain shit to him) the way he pushed her over and walks away makes me nauseous.

But I certainly don't think he deserved to die for that, and I think the series would have been a lot better if instead of kicking her off the train again (which at this point in the scene felt kind of slapstick i'm ngl), Simon finally broke out of his paranoid and delusional thought patterns and they were able to drag everyone back into the mall car for a heart to heart.

In my head in episodes 9 and 10 he's a lot like Catra in The Portal episodes, but instead of getting 2 more seasons after his fall from grace (lol) to recover and heal and fix his issues, he just got killed instead.

And it sucks because dude was clearly mentally ill and traumatized, and as someone who has mental illness and trauma that can make me act out sometimes too, who also struggles to read the room and understand what people want from me if they don't tell me directly, who ALSO had parents that didn't have my best interests as even a consideration to whatever they could gain from me, it kind of reinforces my anxiety which tells me that I deserve to suffer because of x y z stupid thing I did or said 5, 10, even 20 years ago.

(and before anyone says simon had all the chances to change and grow that grace did, please rewatch the season, he absolutely did not and all of the events that led to grace growing as a person happened when simon wasn't around, yes he was immature in a lot of moments but dude literally did not have a normal adolescence and to expect him to act like a fucking adult all the time after that is ridiculous)

[idontwanttospoiltheparty]

Interested in your perception of Julia Baird’s portrait or Mimi vs more common narrative that Mimi rescued John from his mother Julia’s irresponsible parenting. I go back and forth between vilifying Mimi and considering that it might have been a challenging situation if Julia Baird’s dad was alcoholic and didn’t want John around. Although I lean towards holding Mimi accountable for getting social services involved to take away Julia’s custody rights….

First off: obligatory "It was a different time", except I do want to emphasize it, because it's not only to contextualize some of Mimi's behaviour that a lot of people might classify as emotional abuse nowadays, but because it affects literally all of this. Social mores dictated the actions not just of Mimi but of all the Stanley sisters, who in my view all enabled the situation to get as far as it did. And, most pertinently, I don't think people at the time really understood how damaging it is to all parties to separate a child from their parents (and tbh, especially their mother). My main takeaway from the whole situation, as well as what I've learned about "difficult homes" since, is that taking John away from Julia should have been an absolute last resort, unless there was extremely concrete evidence that Julia was being highly abusive towards him.

(and I do mean highly abusive. It, for instance, would not have done Paul and Mike any good to be separated from their father, even if Jim put them through hell at times [though of course, the extent of the abuse they suffered is debatable]. These situations are terrible all-around, but from what I can tell – and what I think John's story shows – breaking apart families is very rarely the best course of action.)

"But Julia was making little John share a bed with her and Bobby Dykins!" – okay, I see how this is potentially a problem, though it's from what I can tell entirely (implied? I don't know that she went so far as to say it out loud) conjecture on Mimi's part that John was made to witness adults having sex. In my opinion, the first course of action here should have been to help Julia out by acquiring a separate bed for John.

I recognize that Julia was probably often irresponsible and, from what I've read about her, I suspect she at times struggled with parenting in way similar to how John would later on – not due to a lack of love, per se, more due to a helplessness in the face of the true burden of taking care of someone and a difficulty comprehending the seriousness and scope of child-rearing. That being said, it's hard to fully blame her when she had her toddler taken away – because of her own sister, as you mention – and had to give up her second baby for adoption. That's twice-over the worst trauma a mother could endure* so it seems natural to me that she would have attachment issues with John later on. Again, helping Julia with her parenting instead of denying her the role of mother seems to me the best course of action here. (Oh look, it's my nuclear family take rearing its head again.)

*some people happily give up babies – I don't have much reason to believe Julia was one of them.

I also think Mimi thought she was doing the right thing and her decision to take John in admittedly made more sense when Uncle George was still alive. This is where the "It was a different time" comes back in, because it would be unfair of me to expect her to understand all the complexity I've been describing. I don't know that I believe Julia Baird's claim that Mimi instigated the entire situation so she could have John for herself – but there is perhaps a middle ground here, where Mimi loved her nephew a lot, felt no one was taking care of him the way she believed he needed, and let that blind her to the damage she was going to inflict by interfering the way she did.

It's difficult to fully assess Mimi's impact on John, because it seems the abandonment issues his early childhood instilled in him made him particularly loyal to her. Mimi was, if nothing else and above all, steadfast. (You can draw a parallel here to Yoko, though that's another discussion.) You aren't gonna find a ton of statements from him condemning her, and I definitely don't want to discount the genuine love they both had for each other. I appreciate that she didn't have an easy task, bringing him up, especially after being widowed, and I appreciate that she came through for him in significant ways.

The thing that motivated my (somewhat callous) post last night, was this:

"You wonder why John didn't have the strength to just say 'Look Mimi, I'm moving in with Mum.'" JULIA BAIRD: "Hm. Well, I remember the– a particular row in the kitchen, where he was going back [to Mendips] after the school holidays and he was crying. And my father [Bobby Dykins] said 'That's it. That's it. I've had enough. You stay here. I'll go and see Mimi. I will sort this out once and for all.' And John said 'Nononono, nonono. I've got to go. Don't tell Mimi.' That was another refrain [?]. 'My dream's out.' and 'Don't tell Mimi. Don't tell Mimi, don't tell Mimi.' She was fearsome, I can tell you. Fearsome." SOURCE: I am the Eggpod, Episode 100, 00:49:49

What I hate about the above quote the most is how often John, even as a teen, is conceptualized as this free-spirited rebel*; but looking at this, it hits extra hard that he was a child who had virtually no power in this situation the adults around him put him in.

*and writers like Mark Lewisohn are definitely not off the hook here; one of the things I find the most questionable about him as a biographer is that, despite his painfully obvious bias towards John, he still fails to contextualize huge chunks of John's childhood, preferring to defend Mimi at all cost.

Now, it does seem like there's some he-said/she-said going on regarding how much Bobby Dykins and John got along. I don't think John spoke super highly of him, but I also don't recall him expressing any larger issues with his pseudo step-father. Yes, Julia Baird is probably biased towards her own parents, but here's the thing: don't most of our pro-Mimi accounts come from her? Is John an unbiased source on the aunt who raised him?

So why should Julia Baird – whom I consider to be one of the most empathetic characters involved in Beatles history; rarely have I seen someone so interested in truly understanding their own family history, considering the cultural context, tying in her experience as a teacher in special needs and talking to multiple people to gain a fuller picture, even when a lot of it must've been incredibly painful for her – be seen as a less trustworthy source than Mimi – who we know has a history of editing stories to suit her:

I [Hunter Davies, the Beatles' official biographer] sent [the manuscript of the biography] to Mimi and she had hysterics. The chapter about his childhood came back with almost every paragraph heavily crossed out or amended. In the margins she had written beside John's own quotes such things as 'Rubbish', 'Never!' She denied so many of John's own memories of his childhood, especially if they contradicted her memories of the same people or events. She was against his use of bad language, as she maintained John had never sworn when he was little, and didn't want stories about him stealing. SOURCE: The Beatles by Hunter Davies, 2009 Introduction

The only thing Mimi has "going for her" as a source is that she was an adult and not a child when these events transpired. I think that's fair enough, and I do believe there are details to this story Julia Baird and we the public will never know, which made Mimi's decisions seem more justified to her and to her family. But that doesn't stop me from largely condemning most of the decisions made, even though I suspect Julia did at least on the surface agree with them.

[wordsinhaled]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @landwriter <3 thank you, gloam!

How many works do you have on Ao3?

14! (yes, only 14)

What's your total Ao3 word count?

14,842

What fandoms do you write for?

so far, it's been the sandman, good omens, and merlin - though i don't have any published (or finished...) merlin fics. i also just finished dead boy detectives, which may result in a bit of fic - we'll see!

Top five fics by kudos:

just pull on your hair, just pull on your pout - shameless excuse to make dream & hob make out in the cold like teenagers, inspired by the cure & a beautiful fanart of professor hob by @pomegranateruin!

eternity is in us now - dreamling proposal fic <3

if the walls were too thin, you would break right in - this was the first dreamling fic i wrote! :D

while the little moments dream - the one where dream offers hob godhood at the end of the world. soft <3

we are the cosmos fleeing the night - i think this was my second dreamling ficlet? dreamling FWB but make it still romantic

Do you respond to comments?

i'll be honest, i'm pretty bad about responding to comments - NOT because i don't appreciate them! i love each comment i receive dearly and they all mean the world to me. but being less generally flustered and knowing what to say in response to comments is something i'm working on. <3

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

maybe this one? all night or a hundred years is my take on the wine-sharing scene from season of mists. so you know, angst comes with the territory but that one hurts me particularly badly, so it probably fits the bill.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

it's DEFINITELY this one, which has no name and which i should probably crosspost to Ao3 at some point, but it's basically dreamling being sappy and getting married. that's it, that's the plot

Do you get hate on fics?

thankfully i never have!

Do you write smut?

i write... smut-adjacent? i don't think i've ever written like, a pure PWP before or anything i would say rates as explicit. it's just something i've never tried and feel kind of intimidated by tbh, though i'm sure it would be fine if i ever do get around to it! if anyone wants to cheerlead me through my first smut fic i am game, lmao (is there ghost detective smut on my horizon???? IS THERE??? listen. it's not an impossibility is all i'm saying)

Craziest crossover:

i am not sure i've actually written a crossover, but i just finished dead boy detectives and i have many crossover thoughts! oh, also sandman/the old guard, of course. though that's not so much crazy as reasonable, i think

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge!

Have you ever had a fic translated?

i don't believe so, but i would be honored!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

never, but it sounds fun!

All time favourite ship?

well, i'm a multishipper, so this one's hard - i can list my OTPs per fandom... the sandman - dreamling, gaulcienne, hob/destruction (honestly hob/all the endless thanks to @softest-punk but i particularly love how you write hob/desire) doctor who - tenrose / doctor/rose & thoschei my beloveds (particular shoutout to twelve/missy, no one's doing it like them) bbc merlin - merthur, merwaine, mergwenthur dbda - obviously edwin/charles [and edwin&charles of course\ (whatever their ship name is I REFUSE TO CALL IT CHEDWIN... PLEASE... SAVE ME...). but i was absolutely also rooting for crystal/niko in addition to that...

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

oh my god i have so many. SO MANY. TOO MANY. i really want to finish the dreamling fealty fic one day because i literally have 2k+ words for it already sitting in my drafts, but i have no idea if i will. also it would be nice to finish ANY merlin WIP sometime this century. i am also debating if i want to start any dbda WIPs but they are... percolating still

What are your writing strengths?

i would say conveying atmosphere in a small number of words, if i had to say something!

What are your writing weaknesses?

FINISHING THINGS! god, and i'm terrible at turning fic ideas into actual writing. the ideas form faster than i can even write them down, but writing the ideas instead of having them play out cool music video-style in my head is SO HARD! also longfic is my kryptonite, i have no idea how authors do it!!!

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

i think it can work, but if it's in a language i understand i find myself focused on if the grammar is correct and such. russian usually... has not been (stevebucky fandom i'm looking at u)...

First fandom you wrote in?

harry potter ages and ages ago was my first fandom, but i don't recall if i ever had any actual proper finished fics that i posted anywhere, until sandman fandom. i wouldn't say i considered myself a "proper" fic writer until dreamling actually

Favourite fic you've written?

hard to say - i like them all for different reasons but i'm proud of the opposite of blindness !

tagging whoever wants to do it as i'm sure most of my mutuals have already done this! <3

[babacontainsmultitudes]

15 Questions for 15 People

@locke-n-k3y thanks for the tag :] ah hm tbh I feel like my answers for these might be a bit boring but let's see...

1. Are you named after anyone?

Yes! (Referring to my legal name- which I still use), I was named after a character from the soap opera "General Hospital" haha.

2. When was the last time you cried?

Last week lol- which was... The first time in a couple months? It was nice but not enough.

3. Do you have kids?

Absolutely not. Never lol.

4. What sports do you play/have you played?

Never did any sports outside of gym class! Not formally, anyways. I do workout (mostly strength/weight training) fairly regularly... But I don't think that really counts here lol. :0 Been thinking a lot lately about picking up boxing.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Yup! irl I often go for a sort of deadpan delivery of my sarcasm- what I've learned from other people is that I'm a little too good at that (I sometimes say very ridiculous things very convincingly). I won't usually specify unprompted that I'm being sarcastic, but you're always welcome to ask. Not as sarcastic online in general, however.

6. What's the first thing you notice about people?

Irl? Hmm. Hard to say. Maybe: eyes, voice, posture.

Online? Typing/texting style I suppose!

7. What's you're eye color?

Dark brown 👁

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Not mutually exclusive lol. But, happy endings. I don't "dislike" tragedies but I'm not actively drawn to them either.

9. Any talents?

HM. I mean obviously I have things I'm good at but I'm never quite sure what differentiates a "talent" from a "skill". I suppose a lot of friends have said something to the effect of me being "good at reading minds" haha- also "good at explaining things" which is debatable but sweet lol.

10. Where were you born?

Halifax! Which I feel fine saying cause I haven't lived there for a long time lol. A foggy fishing city that I miss even now.

11. What are your hobbies?

I guess a large chunk of what I do on this blog counts as hobbies? Writing (whether it's fiction or analysis or shitposts), drawing, audio clipping and editing apparently (though much of that I just keep to myself- same for drawing tbh). :] I've also gotten into making iron-on patches. Tabletop and video games for sure but... Neither as much as I'd like these days. I tend to collect a lot of things as well- most notably coins.

12. Do you have any pets?

I've had MANY pets of many different species- but currently just my cat Bok! I do tend to take care of my older sister's bunny a lot too though.

13. How tall are you?

5'4, which all my 6'0 friends love teasing me over 😒. I've been told that I "seem taller from the way [I] carry myself", however. (Despite everything, I'm actually fine with my height!)

14. Favorite subject in school?

When I was completing my bachelor's (in computer science) I was particularly drawn to graphics-related stuff! In highschool my fave was definitely drama haha (gee I miss it tbh).

15. What is your dream job?

I HAVE NO IDEA no idea and that's kind of my issue rn tbh. Plenty of things that seem interesting, but I don't think I'm the kind of person who could have the same job for my whole life, no matter how perfect it is. I'll presumably end up in something programming-related eventually, though it's not what I'm looking for now. OH OKAY ACTUALLY dream job? Probably doing video essays (or possibly let's plays) on Youtube haha.

15 PEOPLE IS A LOT OF PEOPLE TO TAG AND I ALWAYS FEEL SO SHY TAGGING PEOPLE IN GAMES and I have no idea who's been tagged already ahaha UM NO PRESSURE WHATSOEVER!!! @llumimoon @happi-tree @kaseyskat @abeinginsand @nolassolace @goldturnedgray @swiffin @insomaniiiac @meiwks @calamity-unlocked @coolfire333 @supremely-unsupervised @b1gwings @giraffeskull There! 15! Tried to get a few new people in there lol. But fr no stress!

[notthewriteryourelookingfor]

So I made a Palestine flag pin to wear at work, partially because it feels like all I can do, and partially because the city I work in seems to be having a weekly protest about what's happening in Gaza but I seem to be working or otherwise busy every time so I can't join them but I can do this.

I'm a supervisor at a retail store and if I'm working on the weekend, I'm in charge of the day. (This does matter)

Anyway, yesterday I'd stepped away from the register cuz my coworkers had it covered and I was in the middle of fixing up an isle that was in danger of dropping a bunch of rolls of fabric on someone if they pulled out the wrong roll.

After a second or two, one of my coworkers came up like "Hey the dude at the register is giving [coworker] a hard time about your Palestine pin" so I went over to check out what was going on.

He'd left by the time I got there but I did catch a glimpse of him leaving. I am a larger woman, both because I'm tall (like 175cm which is about 5'8-9") and also wider/a lil chubby, the coworker he'd been having a go at was the smallest of the three of us (all women) that was working there. And part of me thinks that's why he complained to her and not me. Because I'm nearly the same size has him but the one he decided to have a go with was like 60% his body mass.

So she has a name that sounds like it comes from the middle east and I'm p sure he's racist based on what he said so there's that too.

Some of the things he said was "[Palestine] is a terrorist state" (which isn't even how words work tbh) and that me wearing the pin was "offensive and disappointing" and then left. (My coworker told me that these are some of the things she said).

My coworker is ok, she was a little rattled mostly cuz that's just how you react when a customer randomly has a go at you, especially since the majority of our customers are nice (if stupid) and then she was just annoyed that she wasn't able to snap back at him.

I've told the women working yesterday and I'm telling the women who are working with me today (who are also quite small and petite) that our store is not a place for debating, and if they feel uncomfortable about anything a customer is saying they can tell them to leave. I will back them up 100% and cover for them of necessary though our store manager is pretty good about having our back on these things too.

It's just so wild to me that he saw my pin, right below my "I'm a supervisor" pin, went to checkout, saw a tiny, maybe middle-eastern woman ladled as a "team member in training" and decided to parrot racist bullshit that almost definitely came from Fox News and then walk off like he'd won something.

I will say, I've had nothing but good things said to me about my pin. I have the Palestine flag pin, and the Indigenous Australian flag pin, both of which I made out of old fandom badges that I painted over cuz I couldn't find anyone selling badges near me and wanted the Indigenous flag before the voice vote a few weeks back. And then cuz I was continuing to wear that, I decided I should also support another group of people who have been invaded, colonised, oppressed, and demonised. (Just cuz Australians didn't carpet bomb the indigenous people when they were driven from their homes, doesn't mean they wouldn't have if the technology had been available at the time tbh)

People have asked if I made them or have asked where I got them because they wanted to buy them. There are more people who support Palestine than we really realise and that's great.

But:

Leave retail workers alone.

And don't get your info from Fox News or Murdock news.

[mirkwoodshewolf]

Ahh so I’ve had brain cancer since Feb of 2019 (it’s come back 3 times and i just came home from the hospital yesterday so this is why I’m asking) but Quill has been a huge comfort character to me through this. I’ve always seen him as my older brother and imagining him being there for me (especially since his mom had what I have, probably hits him hard) had played a HUGE part in getting me through this. If it’s okay to ask, how do you think he would react fo his sister figure going through this- like how would be support her? (I know it’s weird to find so much comfort in a fictional character but he’s really helped me through this emotionally tbh)

Oh my god I am sooo sorry you're going through this, my grandpa has been dealing with bone cancer since 2015 and it's been rough for all of us. And hey there is NOTHING wrong with seeking comfort in a fictional character, we all do it here even I do it (though I have multiple comfort characters so it's all a debate of who I want to be my comfort character for that reason or day).

Okay so HC for a sister figure who is going through cancer let's see:

When it's the first time you get the brain tumor, he's first immediately hit with PTSD with his mom.

But he also knows that since you're still young, you're feeling absolutely terrified and can't do this alone.

So you can bet your ass that he is searching across the entire galaxy for the best doctors and medicine that will get rid of your cancer permanately.

When he does, he takes you to them and all it takes is a laser eye surgery like machine that targets the tumor and it goes away.

But a year passes and the tumor comes back.

Peter refuses to let this tumor take you away like it did his mom. You're his little sister and he can't let you suffer like this.

So he finds another set of doctors that suggest a microchip to be implanted that will help target any source of the tumor should it ever come back.

Peter asks you if it's what you want. But you don't trust a microchip because what if it short circuits and does something worse than merely malfunctioning.

With the microchip option off the table, the doctors then suggest a minor surgery that'll not only get rid of the tumor, but enhance your brain waves that'll help strength your body and can even attack any cancer cells that may develop in the future.

So you go with the surgery and Peter is right there with you holding your hand the entire time.

For awhile it seems to work, in fact you almost feel enhanced at your new strength. Even your intelligence seemed to be enhanced as you find yourself helping Rocket out with the ship a lot more than you usually did in the past.

But after 2 years after the surgery, the tumor comes back a third time and this time it's with avengance.

Peter is frantic, he's saved the galaxy multiple times. He defeated his own father who was a FREAKIN PLANET!! And helped defeat the Mad Titian Thanos, but he can't defeat a simple brain tumor!!

But what you tell him is, "It doesn't matter how many doctors I see, or what they'll do. It'll keep coming back".

"But I'm your brother! I've always seen you like my sister and I'm supposed to protect you!"

"Peter, you did everything humanly possible. Hell if we were back on Earth, there wouldn't be as many options as we've had here. But cancer is something that is purely universal that not even alien intelligence can beat."

"Isn't it supposed to be me that's comforting you, I mean this has came back on you three times already."

"I think you also need to know this so that you can heal from your experience with this."

Peter smiled at you and embraced you.

"What do you need from me?" he asks you.

"Not doctors, I just need you Pete."

"I'll do my best. But if I can't help you, then we're seeking professional help, deal?"

"Deal." you guys do your secret handshake with one another.

As promised, Peter is there for you.

On your good days he'll merely check up on you asking if there's any dizziness or pain.

And on your bad days, he'll make you as comfortable as possible.

There is no music playing, Drax, Rocket and Groot promised to keep their fighting noises down whenever your headaches grow too much.

If there's ever a time when your sight or hearing goes out, Peter is right there holding your hand squeezing it in code to assure you he's right there.

And you never have to be judged when your nausea hits hard and your vomiting your guts out.

Like a good brother, Peter is there to hold your hair back and rubbing your back in soothing circles.

He'll also try to make sure you're eating and drinking plenty of water. Even when you're not hungry, he at least keeps the food close by.

Even Drax saves you some of his Zarg-nuts.

Though the tumor can't be defeated, Peter knows you're still gonna try and fight it and he's gonna be right there for you win or lose.

Overall I see Peter trying to help you rid of this tumor because he already lost his mother and he wasn't able to do anything about it, but now he can. Even when the tumor keeps coming back, he'll keep fighting but also remember that day with his mom. Terrified and helpless, but no matter what he's there for you like any brother should be.

I wish you all the luck and fighting spirit for you my dear, having a cancer come back multiple times surely can't be easy on you or your family. But you've kept fighting my dear and you are a survivor!! NEVER. Lose that fighting spirit and hopefully one day you'll finally kick this tumor's ass and it'll see that you aren't worth taking down because YOU. ARE. A. SURVIVOR!!

So don't give up my dear, stay strong, always keep fighting, and know you've got support not only from your irl family but your tumblr family here. Good luck my dear!!!

[streetkid-named-desire]

I've also been tagged in some wip whenevers but have had some morale issues lately

First is the collab smut fic between me and @luvwich

Who wants to beta 5,219 words of Bea/VG smut

Finally, he was free. Bea tilted her head to admire: V truly had a beautiful cock. It curved up to rest, heavy with blood and longing, on his lower stomach, still glossy with her spit and begging for more of it. She ran her hands up his torso, moving her body further up his, until her breasts settled on either side of his shaft. With a serene sigh, she wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her head on his stomach. He was warm and soft, his muscles firm but not too firm: the perfect pillow. Eyes slipping closed, she might have nearly dozed off until she felt his cock twitch against her.

And then I wrote that lil sugar daddy thing about VG that is smutty and that I might actually turn into a longer origin thing also as more exposure therapy to writing butt stuff

Charles called to V when he entered the room to join him in the shower. V stripped on his way to the bathroom and as soon as he slid the shower door open, Charles grabbed him by his shoulders and pulled him in. He attacked V's mouth, desperate for connection, for joining. V pushed him away, "Missed me?" Charles grinned and nodded. He turned V around and slammed him against the shower wall and trailed kisses down his spine. V spread his legs as Charles kneaded his firm asscheeks. He teased V, kissing his supple flesh but not quite digging in just yet. V reached his hand between his legs and stroked himself, sighing contentedly.

@merge-conflict gave me good feedback (like really good I deeply appreciate it) on chapter 3 but my brain keeps seeing it as A Whole Thing because there are some major holes I have to fill and I'm kinda just at a standstill. Tbh I'm debating fixing what I feel my brain can fix and then just publishing and moving on. I can fix those other parts later.

Anyway it did force me to resolve the whole V cheating on Panam thing

"Really? A fucking mine?" V stared at the fading blue architecture blueprint for an abandoned mine shaft currently being used by some Raffen. He folded his arms and read the notes in Panam's handwriting where she had annotated various points of egress and speculation around where they were keeping the captives. It was the most thoroughly documented plan he'd ever seen come from Panam.

"What, afraid of the dark?" Panam teased. V looked up at her smiling face, her eyes glinting with the familiar glee she got before gigs. After Saul had convinced her to let V stay with them, she took him aside and yelled at him. A lot. He stood there and agreed with everything she said, every name she called him. She didn’t forgive him–and never would–but she never forgot all that he did for the family, and that mattered. The more time he spent in camp, the closer they got to rekindling their friendship.

Otherwise I've just been playing DAO and taking VP. Been doing some roleplaying with @totentnz of the early years of our Vs friendships

V shifts uncomfortably in his chair and slips his phone back in his pocket. "Did you know you can get unlimited balls for Skee-ball by playing a specific frequency from your phone by the machines?" V looks around at the other games. "Okay, that motorcycle racing game and the snowboarding one? Shove a penny in a specific spot beneath the seat or board and you can lean farther to the side than you should be able to. Just...don't fall off." He stands up to get a better view at the other machines. "Air hockey? Actually, I'm just really good at that one, nevermind." V pulls out his phone again to reply, turned away from V, <got a working shower with hot water?>

My birthday is next month. Gonna get myself a fancy cake. Probably ask it to be decorated in the blorbo colors.

Just got the summer blues or something idk existing is hard

[watchoutforthefanfics]

achievement unlocked 🔓 (part twelve) || Streamer AU! Reddie (IT)

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11

AVAILABLE ON AO3

Inspiration: this prompt + BIRDS OF A FEATHER by Billie Eilish

Summary: Richie liked to play video games, and by some stroke of luck, it became his job. Being primarily known as Trashmouth on stream, he found his own little group of streamer friends and they became intertwined: The Losers Club. It never did feel quite complete, though. Well, until, he got his very own backseat gamer in chat.

TWs: innuendos, lots of talk of sex (it's Richie), cursing, brief mention of toxic relationships, and shameless flirting.

[[A/N: Finally time for the fucking prompt !!! Everyone shout hooray!!! I did change it a little though. There's a lot of fucking Minecraft in this. Just fyi. Anyway, I based how they play on how my siblings and I did. Enjoy :))]]

big.bill ✔️

What about Minecraft?

Richie paused, pressing his lips together.

They'd all been debating a game to stream together since Eddie had asked to play with him (and the Losers). Most of the good ones were limited to like 4, so it was actually pretty fucking hard. Every other day, someone would suggest one, and they'd all debate it. There was nothing that quite clicked yet.

Well, until now.

benny.boy.official ✔️

I've got it on both pc and console

he'd just have to make an account

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

that would make my chat so fucking happy

they have been asking for it for like a month

stan.the.man ✔️

Why haven't you played it then?

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

not in my minecraft phase tbh

it happens like once a year

mike.me.up ✔️

I've seen reels about that

Is that a universal experience ?

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

I think so

reddy.bevvy ✔️

no it's true mine was like last month

lasted 4 months

and then poof

Richie was about to text again, but somebody cut him off.

e.kaspbrak

I've played it like once. Ever.

stan.the.man ✔️

It's honestly pretty easy.

You don't have to know the more complicated stuff. Just the basics.

benny.boy.official ✔️

I can teach you Eddie ☺️

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

see eds don't worry ur pretty lil head about it

we got u

e.kaspbrak

Shut the fuck up, asshole.

And thanks, Ben.

Richie laughed, he really fucking loved him. And his weird ass responses to him. Like who responds so aggressively to someone they like, that they're dating. Richie digs it, so who gives a fuck, honestly-

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

isn't he just so sweet guys

stan.the.man ✔️

You need to be humbled anyway, Rich.

e.kaspbrak

@/stan.the.man You too.

Richie laughed again, taking a moment to absorb it all. His angry little Eds. He knew he was totally 100% serious too, it was nice in a weird sort of way.

mike.me.up ✔️

ooh, you're in trouble~

reddy.bevvy ✔️

that's right Eddie, stick up for your man 😤😤😤

benny.boy.official ✔️

uh oh

big.bill ✔️

Wow.

stan.the.man ✔️

I respect that, Eddie.

Did we decide on Minecraft?

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

eds ?

There was a pause, and Richie mulled over the idea. All of them playing Minecraft. The Losers had done it before, many times, actually. It was a mix of things, survival, creative, and even like the online games (Richie remembers being particularly competitive). It would be different now, with Eddie.

Maybe he could build them both a house, and they could share it-

e.kaspbrak

Yeah, let's do it.

The stream was in a few days, they'd all kind of correlated depending on their schedules, and it all lined up. Which was very responsible of them, so, he was proud of himself. (A win is a win, as they say.) He was troubleshooting Minecraft actually, making sure there were no big ass updates (because there always were) and testing it to make sure it would run properly later.

Richie had also offered to buy an online realm so they could all play together wherever the fuck they were. And so everyone could stream playing it later without someone needing to be there. Any way to get more content, am I right? It was all going pretty good, honestly-

Bzzt, bzzt.

He blinked, moving to his phone (which was vibrating). Grabbing it swiftly, he eyed the reason.

e.kaspbrak is calling

Richie didn't hesitate a moment, smiling big and bright.

"Hey Eddie baby," he cheered, grinning -spinning away from his computer, to give him his undivided attention (like he always did).

"Are you busy?" He asked (like it would matter if he was).

"Never too much for you, Eds," Richie replied with ease, "-Whatcha need?"

"I just-" Eddie started, voice cutting off for a second, "-The stream is stressing me the fuck out."

Richie frowned, "Why?"

"I'm just so fucking nervous," Eddie rush out in a breath, "-What if I can't fucking talk? What's the whole point?"

"Eds, if you can't do it," Richie explained, "-you can't do it. Everybody would understand."

"I know that," Eddie sighed out, speaking faster (Richie could tell he was working himself up), "-but I want to, I do-"

"Okay, okay," Richie relented, softly, "-I hear you."

He could hear Eddie let out a heavy breath, but it was slow. Slower than before, Richie noted it. I can work with this-

"Let's-" Richie started, before pressing his lips together and thinking, "-I can tell when you're working yourself up, Eds, so... if I hear it, I will get you off the stream. Even if it's just for a second."

"You'd do that?"

"Of course, Eds," Richie spoke like it was obvious (which it was), "-I fucking love you. I'm going to help you through shit. Obviously."

Eddie stayed silent. Richie couldn't tell if it was good or bad, so he went with his failsafe-

"You forget I'm your boyfriend?" Richie laughed, "-I know I'm a shithead but-"

"Shut up, asshole," Eddie started to laugh too (Richie was happy with that), "-you're such a dick."

They laughed together for a second, and it stirred into Richie's chest like it always did. He hoped it would feel the same every time, and he was pretty sure it would. It made something more genuine slip from him.

"I'm gonna take care of you, Eds," Richie offered, softly. As genuine as he figured he could ever be, "-okay?"

There was a silence then, a comfortable one. He didn't think it'd ever be uncomfortable with Eddie. He and Eddie just fucking... worked. It rattled through his bones sometimes. He felt like he'd known him his whole life.

"Yeah," Eddie spoke, quietly, "-I know."

"Wow, did you just Han Solo me?" Richie laughed out, playfully.

"Well," he could almost hear Eddie's face scrunch up in frustration, "-what the fuck did you want me to say? Fucking thank you-"

"Oh, I'll take care of you too," Richie listed off, "-Richie, you're the best boyfriend ever-"

"You are such an asshole," Eddie was laughing again and Richie only grinned wider, "-It's common sense for boyfriends to take care of each other, dipshit-"

"Hey," Richie interrupted, playfully (a jab at himself really), "-not in all relationships, Spaghetti."

It was silent for a second, and Richie was a little nervous that he'd crossed some sort of line. Eddie was fiercely protective, even if it was Richie shitting on himself-

"I swear to fucking god, I wish I could beat the shit out of your exes."

Richie snorted, bursting into laughter, "I'm starting to think you're serious, Eds."

"Richie," Eddie leveled, "-I am dead fucking serious."

Richie's laughter cut short, and he pressed his lips together, "You... Seriously?"

Eddie responded, plainly, "I harassed your ex into blocking me on Instagram, dipshit."

"Well, yeah, but-"

"No buts," Eddie interrupted, "-If I wouldn't catch charges, I'd beat the shit out of every single one. Especially, that bitch Connor-"

"My hero, Eds," Richie sighed out, dramatically, "-I'd bail you out."

"Haha," Eddie bit back, sarcastically, "-I'm not gonna get criminal charges, Rich. Not even for you."

"But like-" Richie asked, clarifying, "-in the Purge-"

"Oh yeah," Eddie answered, instinctively (on the exact same wavelength), "-they better watch their fucking backs."

Richie laughed again. Ah Eddie, my little shit. What the fuck would I do without you?

Richie hoped he'd never fucking find out. God, he really fucking hoped, with everything in him, that he'd get Eddie forever. Just fucking forever. He'd do anything-

reddy.bevvy ✔️

stream day babes !!!

Richie blinked at the message like he hadn't been sitting at his computer for the last hour. He was fucking excited, sue him-

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

how we feeling fellas

big.bill ✔️

Gonna try and get to the Ender Dragon this stream.

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

what a fucking mad lad

stan.the.man ✔️

You are clinically insane, Bill.

big.bill ✔️

Speedruns exist for a reason, Stanley.

benny.boy.official ✔️

super excited !!!

setting up Eddie now

reddy.bevvy ✔️

how did he do with your tutorial?

benny.boy.official ✔️

really good !!!

he hates the skeletons though

mike.me.up ✔️

valid take

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

no he's right

they're almost as shitty as the children

stan.the.man ✔️

???

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

the zombie kids

it's funnier to just call them a child

reddy.bevvy ✔️

where is Eddie ???

Richie pursed his lips, something biting at him. Eddie wasn't freaking himself out, was he? It made something in his stomach swirl-

e.kaspbrak

You guys are really fucking impatient.

It's been like 3 minutes since the conversation started.

Richie smiled.

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

3 minutes is long in internet time, eds

e.kaspbrak

I don't believe shit that comes out of your mouth, Rich.

mike.me.up ✔️

get a room you two

reddy.bevvy ✔️

come back to me guys

Richie, are you streaming first?

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

yea

I gotta invite everyone to the realm anyway

speaking of what's eds's gamertag ???

There was an odd pause in the chat, it made Richie furrow his eyebrows. He licked a line along his teeth, waiting a moment. What the fuck-

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

hello ???

benny.boy.official ✔️

I don't wanna get in trouble

Richie furrowed his eyebrows even more, frowning. What the fuck-

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

sweet, sweet benny boy

I can't add him if I don't know his gamertag

There was another pause.

benny.boy.official ✔️

eddie.spaghetti

Richie burst into the brightest fucking grin he thought he'd ever been able to grin.

e.kaspbrak

Don't fucking start.

mike.me.up ✔️

he's definitely already started

hate to break it to you

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

aweeeee 💞❤️🤭💞❤️

eds likes me guyssss

stan.the.man ✔️

Yeah, we know Richie.

big.bill ✔️

Actually, Eddie are you going to start gaming yourself?

Like streaming?

There was another pause, and he watched as Eddie typed in the corner. Little bubbles flickering by.

e.kaspbrak

No.

I think I'm good being known as Trashmouth's boyfriend.

Richie was never going to get over that. My boyfriend, Eddie's my boyfriend, mine, my boyfriend-

stan.the.man ✔️

A brave soul.

mike.me.up ✔️

fair point

Rich is a lot to handle and also highly sought after

Yeah, Richie never really got that. He definitely had fans that were into him like that (he'd seen the edits, which significantly had most clips of him with his glasses off weirdly). He didn't really like it, or agree with it. But he was flattered, in some way. And also maybe weirded out.

reddy.bevvy ✔️

Eddie was one of those

so I think he knows

Richie grinned.

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

celebrity crush for a year and a half babeyyyyyy

e.kaspbrak

Bev, why the fuck would you do that?

He's never gonna shut the fuck up about it now.

mike.me.up ✔️

to be fair I wouldn't either

stan.the.man ✔️

Yeah, you're kind of fucked on that one, Eddie.

big.bill ✔️

Way too good to pass up.

e.kaspbrak

I hate all of you.

That brought Richie to now, fidgeting with his hands as he made some adjustments to the game. Adding everyone in was pretty easy, honestly, he'd just want to do a final test run on his equipment. He went through a checklist in his head: charged controller, good framerate, open discord, and a slew of just stream shit.

Mindlessly, he adjusted his collar, he was actually wearing one of the two Bev made him (the one with the stars, he should clarify). It was really comfortable, and nicely colored. It might’ve been his favorite shirt honestly-

There was a little chime, and Richie opened his mouth to see if it was on the call or the game-

"Hey, Rich," Stan commented, "-You're early."

"Staniel, hey," Richie countered, "-You gonna go ahead and join the world?"

"Yeah, sure," Stan answered, "-I'm just checking some of my stream shit."

"Yeah, oka-"

Chime.

"Hi," Bev smiled, "-how's setting up, you two?"

"I actually troubleshooted today," Ruchie commented, "-so you guys should be very fucking proud of me."

"That's the bare minimum, Rich," Stan responded, flatly.

Bev clapped, he could hear it through her microphone, "Good job, honey."

There was a pause.

Chime.

"Hey g-guys," Bill called out, "-everything working on t-the world, R-Rich?"

"You know it, Billy," Richie chimed back.

Chime.

"Hello," Mike spoke, cheerfully, "-how's everybody doing?"

Everyone chimed in how they felt, respectfully one at a time though. They'd already figured out a balance, especially in regards to talking. Their streams needed to be organized, so all the kinks were already worked out.

Stanley started up, judgementally, "Did you seriously name it 'Tenacious D'?"

"Yep," Richie answered, "-What can I say, I love Jack Black."

"A-And it's a dick j-joke," Bill added.

Richie pursed his lips, before admitting, "And it's a dick joke."

Chime.

"Hey guys," Ben cheered out -soft and gentle like he always was. It offered a different kind of vibe to the group, a nicer one. Warm, inviting. Richie understood why people liked watching his streams, "-Imma run over and fix Eddie's mic-"

Richie suddenly realized they were most definitely in different rooms, why didn't he think of that beforehand? He did kinda want Eddie to be on his streams in person first, though, so he was kinda fucking glad, honestly-

Chime.

There was silence.

"Eddie?" Beverly called, gently.

"I think he's nervous," Ben answered back, carefully.

Richie was gnawing at his lip. His hands fidgeting with some of the shit on his desk, he tapped along the wood.

"There's nothing to be nervous about," she chimed again, softer.

He scrambled for a second, trying to figure out how exactly to help in front of everybody. How to get Eddie out of his head-

"Imma annoy you until you unmute, Eds," he sung out -off key, of course.

Nothing.

"Billy, Mikey," Richie hummed, knowing exactly who to recruit, "-start a chant with me."

"Y-Yeah, okay," Bill responded.

Mike agreed -wholeheartedly, "Let's do it, Rich."

"UNMUTE! UNMUTE! UNMUTE!"

"Guys, shut the hell up," Ben spoke -flatly, "-this is very stressful for him."

Richie's lips snapped shut, and the others followed suite. Oh shit.

Bev chimed then, softly, "Eddie, it's okay if you don't want to talk, we understand."

Richie was gnawing at his lip again, wringing his hands (he wanted to fucking be there and fucking help-), "You know we understand if you can't do it, Eds. And you sure as fuck know I'm not gonna hate you for it."

I love you, you know that. That's not going away.

There was a sigh, what Richie knew to be an Eddie sigh. He had like everything about him memorized, seriously. Richie lightened just a little.

"It's okay," Eddie breathed out, faster than he should (Richie logged it in his head), "-I'm just really fucking nervous-"

It's like a switch in Richie's brain flipped, a lightbulb going off in his head. It was just instinct, helping Eddie calm down. (He was half joking and half genuine, as he always was.)

He leaned back in his chair, distancing himself from the microphone (for dramatic effect, of course. And maybe not to blow people's ears out).

"HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK I’M IN LOVE-"

"Oh, shut up, asshole," Eddie laughed, his favorite kind actually -the one he meant (he really was so fucking in love with him, he wanted to shout it from the rooftops), "-You're such a fucking moron."

"Yeah," Stanley responded, "-sounds like Richie's type."

Bill agreed, "N-No yeah, d-definitely."

"Eddie, I'm so glad to actually hear you," Bev smiled, avoiding the other two -distinctly (like she was a disappointed mother), "-I've only heard your voice through videos."

"It's weird," he laughed a little, "-hearing all of you guys. I'm so used to your streams, it's fucking weird to hear you talking to me. Other than Ben and Mike, obviously. And well, Richie too."

"T-That, must've b-been fucking weird," Bill spoke, kinda like a question, "-fucking flirting w-with your celebrity c-crush? I c-can't even imagine-"

"It's not," Eddie spoke suddenly, before amending, "-Don't get me wrong when I saw that he liked my post, I literally almost ate shit-"

"How?" Bev laughed.

"I was on a morning jog," Eddie clarified, "-heard my phone chime through my headphones, and almost fucking faceplanted."

"Hey, I didn't know that," Richie complained, maybe pouting his lips like a sad toddler (no one else could see so, it didn't matter).

"You would've said something stupid about it," Eddie explained, plainly, "-and I hear enough of your stupid shit."

Richie opened his mouth to respond, like he always did with Eddie. Probably like 'I thought you liked when I said shit'-

"How is it not?" Ben steered the conversation back, gentle and calm.

Eddie seemed to take a second, and Richie waited. He was really fucking invested in this, honestly. He wanted to know-

"I don't fucking know, it's-" he started, most definitely flustered (Richie could physically see the puffed-up cheeks in his mind), "-It was strangely fucking natural. Like I've known him forever. Been dealing with his shit forever-"

Richie felt something squeeze in his chest. He knew he felt that way, but to know Eddie did too? It made his heart burst so much that he felt like it might claw out of his chest and land in Eddie's hands. Where it fucking belonged-

"He wasn't-" Eddie continued, trying to find his words, "-He wasn't Trashmouth to me, he was always... always Richie. If that makes any sense."

There was silence for a second, like everyone was processing it. Fuck, Richie still was-

"Yeah," Stanley echoed out, soft, "-it does, Eddie."

They kept talking for a little longer, before Richie broke off to start streaming. He muted himself in the discord groupchat until they all started playing (survival, by the way). The intro and shit needed to be individual, so, they worked it out that way.

"Hey, motherfuckers," he called out, before going into like an announcer's voice, "-it's the long awaited Minecraft stream-"

dizknees: THE TITLE THO

minecrafter.on.main: fucking finally

trashy.tozier: SPAGHETTI TOO????

elite._.gamer: this is going to be so much fun !!!

geez.zee: @/sam.i.am bet u 10 bucks he blows stan's house up at least once

only-here-for-trashmouth: 🍝🍝🍝 ???

the.losers.are.better: finally some delicious fucking food

babey_boy: hey everybodyyyyy

sam.i.am: @/geez.zee deal

girls.girl: can't believe Eddie's gonna be playing, love wins

trashmouth-for-me: SCREAMING !!! EDDIE !!!

Right, the title: Minecraft w/ The Losers 2.0 (now featuring 🍝).

Richie was honestly pretty fucking proud of himself-

"Yes, chat," Richie laughed, "-my boyfriend will be joining us today, and everybody else too. Not that you fuckers seem to care."

genuine._.disappointment: is 🍝 streaming too ?

"Oh, no," Richie corrected, "-Eds, is not a streamer, he doesn't really want to be. You guys will hear him though, and probably see him a lot, because, well, you're fucking watching me-"

screamingandcrying: whipped

toziers-trash: no bc I get it I'm obsessed too

younganddumb: crying in single rn

too.tough.to.cry: #1 Eddie content creator

trashmouth-for-me: @/tozier_babeyyyy get here the clips for your comp !!!

grumpy_frog: so many wins for reddie rn

an_idiot_sandwich32: creative or survival

reddie-girlie: I have risen

babey_gurlll: so excited !!!

tellmealie34: hardcore ? jk... unless 👀

trashy.tozier: @/reddie-girlie THAT WAS SO FUCKING FAST WHAT

your._.mom: r u a builder or miner ? or fighter ?

minecraft-minecraft76: is this survival ?

toziers-trash: @/reddie-girlie @/trashy.tozier the army is rising 🫡

genuine._.disappointment: @/your._.mom he's gay hope this helps

Richie pointed out a few more chats (the game type and if it was a realm, mostly), before finally loading into the game. He waited a few seconds, messaging if everyone was ready and when they answered connecting the audio.

"You guys hear everybody okay?"

dizknees: all good 👍

Richie nodded, before turning toward the game -typical forest. He watched as faces popped into the world, each one a unique skin (except for Eddie). He should clarify that he made Stan make one, otherwise, he would've been Steve.

"Alright troops," Richie chimed, low tone (like a sargent), "-let's get that fucking wood."

Near instantly, Eddie responded -Steve turning to him (his Tony the tiger skin really was a dead giveaway), "Since when are you the fucking boss?"

genuine._.disappointment: EDDIEEEE

grumpy_frog: 🍝🍝🍝

trashy.tozier: his name is EDDIE.SPAGHETTI ??? SOBBING

babey_boy: 🍝🍝🍝

kermie_my_love: 🍝🍝🍝

trashmouth-for-me: @/trashy.tozier that's so cute 😭

the.losers.are.better: ah, Eddie how we love you

tozier_babeyyyy: clipped

maybe_maybelline45: 🍝🍝🍝

reddie-girlie: say that king 👏

"Good point," Richie relented, "-and also, chat says hi, Eds."

There was a moment.

"Hi," he responded, a little sheepishly (so fucking cute, it made Richie want to physically explode).

Richie watched as his chat blew by with both waves and 'hi's with a smile. They probably rivaled him at this point-

"Is this k-keep inventory?" Bill asked.

Richie pressed his lips together, "Yeah, there's no fucking stress in my Minecraft game, Bills."

Bill's character (one that looked like him) promptly leaped off the mountain. Richie burst into laughter within seconds.

"What the fuck-" Eddie piped up, laughing a little himself.

"Yeah, Bill," Mike continued (he was some sort of media character that Richie knew but couldn't quite name), "-What are you doing?"

"I s-saw c-coal," Bill explained, shortly, "-I knew I c-could make it."

Richie was still laughing, "You did that for coal?"

Stan, whose skin looked exactly fucking like him, was still mindlessly gathering wood -unaffected, "Why are we surprised guys? It's fucking Bill."

Bev agreed, diligently breaking grass and flowers, "Yeah, he's going to do shit like that."

"K-Keep talking," Bill scoffed, "-see who you fuckers c-come t-to for resources."

Eventually, all of them ran into a village.

"What the fuck is this?" Eddie called out, and Richie turned to see him slowly looking around the area.

"You didn't see a village in a tutorial, Spaghetti?" Richie smiled, asking curiously.

Ben clarified, quickly, "We were in creative."

"Oh," Richie hummed, before answering, "-it's a village, and those fuckers are villagers. We're basically here to steal their shit."

Eddie roamed closer to Richie, like he would protect him (Richie nearly fucking died right there), "Are they enemies?"

"Eds," Richie teased, "-are they trying to kill you right now?"

"Fuck you," Eddie bit back, most definitely flustered and frustrated, "-We're stealing their shit, I didn't know if they were gonna fucking... be mad."

"Eds," Richie smiled, teasing again (he'll admit it), "-are you afraid the villagers are going to be mad at you?"

"I will kill you."

"Sadly, PvP is turned off," Richie commented, "-but I would turn it on for you if I could."

"Shut up," Eddie was laughing, and it made something in him shimmer.

tozier_babeyyyy: this is a gold mine rn

girls.girl: new way to flirt just dropped

girlie-pops: fuck romeo and juliet I want what these bitches have

yodel-hey-he-who: 🍝🍝🍝

only-here-for-trashmouth: I'm sobbing why do I love them

trashy.tozier: @/tozier_babeyyyy ur comp is gonna HIT

shake_my_spear: no bc I'm new but I'm invested

reddie-girlie: EDDIE !!!

Richie just shook his head, smiling (he was so entirely fucked, as always), and making a crafting table.

"There," he dropped him a sword (just a stone one but it was better than fucking nothing), "-if the villagers start swinging, Eds, you're protected."

"Fuck you," Eddie responded, before adding, "-but thanks, Rich."

"Yeah, yeah-"

"BILL, WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT-"

They both spun around, and Richie watched Bill get launched by the iron golem -halfway across the village. He couldn't help but fucking laugh, his friends were such fucking idiots-

"What the fuck is that?" Eddie asked -horrified, and Richie watched him roam closer again (even though he had the sword).

"I w-want his s-shit!" Bill answered, swiftly running away -the golem closely behind.

"Iron ingots?" Stan replied -incredulous, "-Just go fucking mining-"

"Don't worry, Eddie baby," Richie spoke through laughter (he was wiping his eyes, seriously), "-he's like the bodyguard for the villagers. Bill definitely fucking picked that fight."

"Oh," Eddie spoke, softer, and god, Richie loved the shit out of him.

"Now, hate to do this to you, Eds, but-" Richie chimed, pulling out his sword and chasing after Bill, "-I gotta get in on this shit."

dizknees: EDDIE BABY ???

biggurls_dontcry5: bill is insane

yoohoo789: I really feel Stan rn

trashmouth-for-me: @/dizknees 😭😭😭

grumpy_frog: that's what I expected honestly

babey_boy: bills pov must be crazyyyy

trashy.tozier: @/dizknees @/trashmouth-for-me the pet names are killing me

minecrafter.on.main: this is so fucking funny

the.losers.are.better: I literally love these streamers

Bill did, in fact, die. Richie didn't, he killed the fucker, and then refused to give Bill the iron ingots. As Richie Tozier would do.

After that, the whole group was trying to find a place to stop. They were at that point where they had too much shit to keep moving. So, eyes were peeled (even throughout the nights, which Richie neatly stayed by Eddie's side through, if you were wondering).

Personally, Richie didn't really give a fuck about where they lived. He did like to see the sick ass mountains generated with like cool peaks and shit, but he didn't have to build there. So, he was kinda lenient.

"Is this a flower field?" Eddie asked, curiously.

Everyone stopped to look ahead. And there was one, levels and levels of flowers. Richie even saw sunflowers, actually, turned toward the sun. It really was just... good, Minecraft was so feel-good sometimes-

"Yeah," Mike answered, "-sometimes they spawn. It's nice, isn't it?"

Eddie didn't say anything for a second, Steve just turned out to the flowers. Richie wished he could see him like this, what his face looked like-

"It's really fucking pretty."

Richie wasn't fucking moving an inch. He was going to throw a tantrum if they didn't set up camp here, actually. And he knew how to throw a fucking tantrum-

"I'm staying here," he expressed, flatly, "-I'm living here. My vote's for here-"

Stan spoke up then, deadpanning, "I wonder why."

"I'm dead fucking serious-"

"I like it too actually," Bev interrupted, ignoring both of them, "-It's got the flowers and a cute little creek. My vote is for here too."

Ben hummed -unsurprisingly (because obviously), "I agree, it's nice and flat too."

Mike added, "Who am I to disagree?"

"I-I just w-want to p-put down my b-bed," Bill offered, abruptly. Richie knew he probably wouldn't even spend time building a house, or maybe he was afraid of dying again.

"So your vote doesn't matter," Bev addressed, "-Stan? Eddie?"

Stan answered, after a few hesistant seconds, "Yeah, I like it."

Eddie was quiet for a second, "We don't have to do it here, guys-"

"We want to," Ben chimed back, and Richie could tell he was smiling. All warm and just Ben. Richie could feel it all the way across the country.

"Plus," Mike leveled, "-Richie isn't gonna let us go anywhere else."

"Very true," Stanley agreed -succinctly. And yeah, he really wasn't.

There was a pause.

"Well, then," Eddie sighed out, maybe flustered again, "-yeah. I like it here. A lot."

"Awesome!" Bev chimed, happily, "-Let's place down our beds, and then-"

"I don't have one," Eddie offered, maybe a little concerned.

"I've got one for you, Eds," Richie soothed -casually, "-no worries."

Eddie was soft and quiet, barely above a whisper, "Thanks."

Richie blinked, tilting his head slightly. It was a weird reaction, he noted. He didn't think it was him being nervous (or the bad kind that they talked about), but still... it was different.

"'Course, Eds," Richie laughed (I love you), "-Imma place it, just hit it once, and you'll make it your respawn point."

Eddie obediently did so.

The others were bickering, but Richie wasn't really listening. He was a little lost. It felt like Eddie was actually fucking here. Like he was standing right next to him. In a fucking Minecraft game, he felt so fucking close to him for once.

And that feeling shook through his bones.

"I'm just gonna start building my house," Bev called out, and it knocked him right out of his thoughts. He really didn't have a fucking clue about what they'd been talking about before, but-

Richie cleared his throat, just moving on autopilot (which in this case meant building a chest and putting all of his shit in said chest). It was instinctual. And helped him shake that feeling of Eddie being so fucking far-

"Can I build the house?"

Richie hummed, preoccupied, "Hmm?"

"Our house," Eddie clarified, simply, "-Can I build it?"

trashy.tozier: OUR HOUSE

minecrafter.on.main: no bc I came here for Minecraft why am I crying

babey_gurlll: it's not love if they don't build you a joint Minecraft house

only-here-for-trashmouth: @/trashy.tozier 😭😭😭

ghoulie_girlie69: 🍝🍝🍝

toziers-trash: this is so sweet

younganddumb: is this even a trashmouth stream rn ??? or is it a coming-of-age romcom ???

babey_boy: this is so gay where's the gay shit guy

grumpy_frog: 🍝🍝🍝

shake_my_spear: this feels like I'm watching a movie

Richie processed that for a second. Taking it in. He blinked once and just stared at his screen -he'd said it so casually. It shot through his heart.

Our house.

"Yeah, of course," he finally said, laughing a little, "-I would've just made a fucking dirt fort anyway."

"Ew," Eddie frowned (Richie could almost see the shrivel of his nose).

"If you, um," Richie pressed his lips together, maybe a little awkwardly, "-If you need any supplies, tell me, and I'm fucking on it."

Eddie waited a second, like he was thinking, "Could you get me some flowers? It's kinda fucking plain as shit over here."

Fuck, Richie would get them all. For him. For Eddie. God. I love him, I love you, I love you-

"Aye, aye, captain!" Richie chimed instead, saluting (even though Eddie could not see it).

"Stop fucking saluting," Eddie chastised, "-I know you're doing it. It's such a stupid bit-"

Richie laughed -decidedly still saluting, "Sir, yes, sir!"

"Did you do it again?" Eddie asked, accusingly. Like he could see him straight through the screen. Like he knew him so well, and he fucking did-

"Maybe."

Eddie let out something between a sigh and a laugh (or a hidden laugh, he definitely tried to hide it), "You're an idiot."

Richie grinned, a big wide cheesy grin like it was just the two of them. Like he was right fucking in front of him. Like Eddie was there, and he wasn't-

Fuck. He was so fucking far away-

Stan interrupted the thought, "Hey, Rich, do have any extra sticks? I wanna build a fishing rod and get away from all that shit."

Richie looked toward Bev's rough shape of a house. It was only just started, but her and Ben seemed to be working together on it. Maybe they were taking a break? And Bill wasn't anywhere to be seen, he assumed he'd gone into a nearby ravine (that Richie had almost fallen into and died like three fucking times).

"Awe, Stanthony doesn't want to be a third wheel?" Richie cooed, patronizingly.

"For you or them," Stan clarified, before reiterating, "-Sticks?"

"I get 50% of the good loot," Richie remarked, throwing some out of his inventory, "-which I know you fucking get from enough fishing."

"25%," Stan stated like it wasn't even a debate, "-because you could fucking fish yourself."

"Fine," Richie conceded.

"Yeah, thanks," Stanley commented passively, before going towards the nearest water source.

When he turned around, he didn't expect his one chest to triple. But it had.

Richie furrowed his eyebrows, watching as Eddie (Steve really) went through the line -opening each one for a moment and then moving down. He pressed his lips together and tilted his head.

"Uh," Richie tried, "-Eds?"

"Yeah?" Eddie replied, unmoving in his cycle.

"What-" Richie started, staring, "-What are you doing?"

"Sorting the chests," Eddie responded -frankly, "-fucking obviously."

Richie hummed, "You know you're gonna have to pick all that shit back up to put it into the house, right?"

"No," Eddie retorted, plainly, "-you're gonna have to pick all this shit up and put it in the house. And then, I'll organize it again."

"Eddie baby, I will do that for you, don't get me wrong, but-" Richie pointed out, "-that's still double the work for you."

Eddie didn't flinch, not even looking up, "I don't mind."

Richie pursed his lips before shrugging, and retorting -flat and nasally, "Yes, dear."

"Haha, hilarious-" Eddie mocked, still busy, "-Didn't I ask for fucking flowers, dickweed?"

Richie repeated, even more nasally (it was almost Squidward), "Yes, dear."

"You're such a-"

The rest of the stream was much calmer, just slow little builds. Richie did eventually join Bill in the mines, where they had quite a harrowing adventure. Including landing in one block of water, fighting six skeletons at once, uncovering a mob spawn, and finding the fucking WARDEN (which Richie did not know about until Bill saw it)-

That did, in fact, kill them. But Richie went back to a finished house, perfectly organized chests, and well... Eddie, so, he counts it as a win.

benny.boy.official ✔️

that was really fun, guys !!!

mike.me.up ✔️

yeah, I miss our group streams

reddy.bevvy ✔️

we def have to do more

big.bill ✔️

Yeah, pretty sure this kick-started my yearly Minecraft phase.

Richie was about to type out a message, when he got another notification.

e.kaspbrak

Hey, Rich.

Can we talk in this chat?

Richie frowned for a second.

trashmouth.tozier ✔️

yeah of course eds

why ?

everything okay ?

Richie stared at the bubbles for a few more seconds, watching as they typed and retyped. Until, they just disappeared. He frowned again, ready to follow up-

e.kaspbrak is calling

He flinched at the noise, taking a second. What the fuck is happening? Even still, he clicked answer -unhesitatingly.

Before he could even open his mouth, Eddie was talking.

"You should come get me next week."

Richie blinked, "What?"

"Come get me next week, Thursday," Eddie clarified like it would make more sense when he repeated it.

"Eds," he laughed, "-you have like two weeks left of the month-"

"I know what I said, dipshit," Eddie replied -biting back, "-Things change and they fucking have."

Richie felt like the words were lodged in his throat.

"Do you not-" Eddie started up, hesitantly, "-Do you not want me there earlier? Or-"

"Eds, I would bring you here right now if I could," Richie explained, instantly (Eddie was not thinking that for one more fucking second), "-I would get into my car at 3 am if you wanted me to-"

Eddie interrupted, bitterly (in a caring kinda way), "You are not fucking doing that."

"-I just don't want you to fucking... regret it."

"Regret what?" Eddie asked, genuinely.

"I don't know-" Richie started, "-moving in with me, not waiting the full month, fucking anything, Eds. I don't know if I... I don't know if I could handle you regretting a single fucking thing."

Eddie was silent for a second. And it made Richie debate the biting his nails habit again. They were actually pretty healthy, so he thought might've really fucked them up-

"Richie," he began, carefully, "-that stupid fucking game made me realize... that I was just wasting fucking time."

Richie fell silent. For once.

"I don't-" Eddie cleared his throat, "-I don't wanna be in New York anymore. I wanna fucking be with you. So fucking badly that sometimes it physically hurts."

Something curled up in his chest, and Richie felt a little like crying. The good kind, he should say.

"And I know that I just fucking said a month, but it's just-" Eddie let out a long sigh, "-That stupid game, you were right fucking there. And I want you right fucking there all the time."

God, he was fucking crying. Maybe he'd even get to ugly crying if Eddie kept this shit up.

"When the fuck have I done the shit that I want?" Eddie echoed out, "-Ever? So I'm gonna fucking do it. You're gonna show up at my doorstep whether you fucking like it or not-"

Richie laughed and it was a little teary. God, I fucking love him. So much.

"-and I'm going to San Francisco. Because this shit sucks, and I wanna be there. With you, and your dumb fucking jokes, and your fucking shitty ass shirts, and your crooked as fuck smile, and your... just... just everything."

Yeah, okay, here comes the ugly crying.

"Fuck, Eds," Richie laughed, sniffling, "-you can't just pull all that shit out on me again. Last time you did I fucking confessed my love for you. What the fuck am I supposed to do now-"

"Come and fucking get me," Eddie replied simply.

"Yeah, okay," Richie breathed out, shaky, "-Thursday."

"I changed my fucking mind," Eddie erupted again, somehow sharp and happy (Eddie did that a lot), "-come tomorrow. Start your trip tomorrow."

"What the fuck?" Richie laughed, fucking elated (had he ever been elated in his fucking life?), "-Tomorrow?"

"Yes," Eddie affirmed, "-I'm already gonna have to wait like 5 days for you to fucking get here. So tomorrow."

"Shit, okay, yeah," Richie grinned, "-tomorrow. I gotta do so much shit-"

"Let me guess, you haven't even thought about packing?" Eddie chastised.

"Eds, I had weeks," Richie countered, "-Why would I pack fucking weeks in advance?"

"I have," Eddie offered.

"Spaghetti, I love you, I do," Richie chimed, "-but you're a little freak of nature."

"I am average fucking height, dickweed-"

"Not in America," Richie contradicted, in a sort of sing-songy tone, "-Also fucking love that you're only arguing the little part."

"I fully acknowledge that I'm a freak," Eddie explained, "-because you love me and you know that. So, it's pretty fucking irrelevant at this point."

"Is that all that matters?" Richie laughed.

"Yeah," Eddie answered (like it was obvious), "-you've already said that you're gonna take care of me. And that fucking includes the freakiness. Nothing else matters."

Just you and me, Richie's mind hummed -calm and quiet, Just you and me.

"Yeah, Eds," Richie agreed, grinning, "-nothing else matters."