#identities pulled fully formed out of a magic hat

[max-nolastname]

at first i was like "there is never gna be a character like john silver" then i remembered that sophie devereaux exists

[forcebewitht]

Hearts And Spades And Friendship With Games (Disneyland: Ace Trappola and Deuce Spade x MC!Reader) 

The time had finally arrived. You had been waiting for this day for a long time. After a good bit of convincing on both Ace and Deuce's ends for the upcoming spring season, you had convinced the pair to travel with yourself and Grim over to a very magical place- Disneyland. You had been gushing about wishing to go ever since you had heard mentions of the place- after all, there was nothing like that back where you were from. So, here you were. You were now sitting upon a bus and happily chirping away to both Grim and Deuce. Grim was beside you in your seat while Deuce and Ace were directly across from you. Ace snorted after a while, shaking his head and glancing over at you. "I can't believe you're this choked up about a kid's park. Pffft- how childish! Haha!" Deuce sighed and shook his head, sending his fellow friend a glare. "And yet, you agreed to come with us. So, maybe it isn't as childish as you claim." The boys were already beginning to bicker back and forth. Grim shifted over to rest within your lap, gazing up at you happily. "Nyaaaahhaaaa! This is gonna be fun, y'know! Think of all the food! La la la~" You couldn't help but to release a giggle at the monster beneath you, now lightly petting him upon the head. "I am really excited about this, Grim! It seemed so...magical when everyone started talking about it! Hehe." Deuce soon looked over at you with a wide smile, his eyes lighting up and practically dazzling in the sunlight from the outside of the bus. "We're gonna get lots of pictures and souvenirs, okay? I'm going to find something extra special for my mom while we are there." Ace shook his head and snickered, glancing on over at his friend again. "Pleeaaassseeeee. I'll just be on the lookout for some princess material ladies. Hehe." After an eyebrow arch from you, Ace rose his hands in defense and laughed. "I'm kidddddiinngggg, [Y/n]. You're more close to queen material, anyways. Haha!" 

Right as you were about to retort, the bus screeched to a stop. The doors slowly opened, multiple other park-goers now making their way out into the land. Your little ragtag group was the last to get off. You allowed your eyes to widen in wonder and curiosity at the sight of the grand park. Deuce seemed to smile as he gazed up at the grand castle, as though a memory was playing through his head. Grim leapt out and jumped onto your shoulder to get a better view, already singing out his joy. Ace was the last to get off. He seemed to be a bit more passive about it, but you would be lying if you said you didn't see a sparkle in his eyes as well. The four of you now began to walk over to the main entrance with the rest of the crowd. Multiple occurrences began to hit your senses all at once. Children laughing joyfully filled your ears, the sizzling sensations of nearby food trucks wafted out into the air and graced your nostrils with its presence, and the bright and cheerful colors of the park all melded together into one gregarious scene. A warm smile tugged at your lips at the sights. A costumed man suddenly stepped up behind the four of you. The four of you turn around to face him and begin to chat. The fellow waves his hand, sparkles raining down from his fingertips. Four little headbands of sorts appeared upon the head of yourself and that of your friends. A cute little headband with mouse ears and a red polka dot bow popped itself onto Ace's head. For Deuce, another little headband with mouse ears- except with a. starry, deep blue, mini wizard's hat. For Grim, a cute little headband with a sailor's cap had popped onto his head. And finally, for yourself, a pair of white gloved hands that stuck out on either side of your head like ears upon a black headband was conjured onto your head.

Ace began to whine about his headband having a bow on it, to which the staff member laughed. He explained that the headbands were complementary and strode off. You gently poked at one of the hands upon your own headband and giggled. Grim leapt around with his sailor's hat on for joy, already making a beeline for a food stand. Given prompting from yourself, Ace and Deuce soon followed you as you chased after Grim. The monster had grabbed a little ice cream bar in the shape of a mouse's head and was now eating it happily. The rest of you soon followed suit, already snapping a few pictures away and settling down onto a bench. Once the bars were done, the four of you arose and began to travel around to different stands. A roller coaster with water included by the name of Splash Mountain was soon selected, the four of you joyously laughing or groaning out after being soaked so much. After that, a frightening stroll through the Haunted Mansion was taken. The effect of the walk-in "ride" of sorts seemed to have greatly improved over the years- for Ace had leapt into Deuce's arms a couple of times in his own fright. You had to hold Deuce back from punching a few of the more particularly scary creatures in the face while Grim nearly lit the entire mansion on fire. More rides were traveled on, such as Big Thunder Mountain Railroad (Deuce screamed something about his magic bike during that one), some Pirates Of The Caribbean ride (Ace imitated a pirate the entire time and laughed about Jack's Halloween idea from before), Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage (Grim kept saying something about finding a live tuna and eating it), and many more. But nothing seemed to excite the pair of boys more than when your group finally made their way over to the Wonderland themed area. Ace and Deuce were both beside themselves in their joy. Ace madly tapped both you and Deuce on the shoulder, pointing at a nearby costumed park worker. "Look at that card suit guy! I wonder how they get those costumes so exact?!" Deuce followed his gaze, already pulling out his phone and turning to the both of you with a wide smile. "Let's go get a picture!" A giggle from yourself and a shake of your head is all that's given. You soon follow the pair over, Grim slowly making his way over behind you (he had to make sure people didn't step on him a lot). Ace soon grinned wildly and turned to you, eyeballing your form. "Ohhhhhh yeah. That'll be awesome." You couldn't help but to feel worried at the look on Ace's face. The Card Soldier slammed his staff down upon the ground, a dazzling ruby light now surrounding your form. Once the light cleared, you found yourself in an almost identical Card Soldier suit- but yours was red while the worker's was black. The worker gave a nod with another pair of slams of his staff in a farewell, now walking over to greet more park goers. Deuce pumped his fist into the air at the sight of you. "Aaaahhhh- you look so awesome, Prefect! This'll be perfect!" You couldn't help but to grin at the sight of yourself now in the suit, slamming your own makeshift staff upon the ground to accompany the look. Grim laughed and took Deuce's phone, now leaping up onto a high enough ledge to take a picture. He grinned brightly, making motions for all of you to make a pose. "Alright! Nyaha! Everybody say- hearts and spades!" All three of you copied what Grim had said and posed. Once a few pictures were snapped, you found the costume upon you began to slowly melt off of your form. A singular red rose was now upon your top with a miniature card with a heart upon it now clipped onto it in the costume’s place. 

By now, the sun was beginning to set. Grim stayed down below and got a few more bites to eat while the three of you went onto a ferris wheel. The sun was now slowly beginning to set, painting the sky a vibrant array of warm colors. You sighed out in bliss, allowing your chin to cradle within your hand. Ace and Deuce both glanced at each other for a moment and then looked on over at you. Almost immediately, both of their expressions seemed to soften. Ace was the first one to speak up, confident and boisterous as ever. "Hey, Prefect- I have something I want to tell you." Deuce choked a bit on the air and blushed, now gazing at you as well within your seat. "S-so do I! Ahem." You couldn't help but to arch a brow again, peering on over at the two boys. Your gaze flickered between the two of them, their skin seeming to glow and sparkle in the cascading sunlight behind you. At the exact same time, the pair looked up at you and spoke, "I love you, [Y/n]." Ace's expression was rather warm yet still held a flicker of his normal mischief within them. Deuce's expression was all around warm and rather soft in comparison to his normal outbursts of anger from time to time. They both soon began to blush and allowed their eyes to widen at their realization of their exact same statements. Ace and Deuce met gazes for a moment. They glared playfully at each other for a moment and then brought their intense gazes back to you. Your eyes slightly watered as you sniffed and wiped a free tear away, your smile now extending from ear to ear. You brought them both into an embrace, grinning sweetly in the sunset. "...Don't worry. I love you too, boys." Both boys seemed to exhale in relief. Ace raised an eyebrow at Deuce to which Deuce nodded. They both leaned in at the same time, kissing you on the cheek. As you froze and a blush began to spread across your cheeks, they both took their own moments to sweetly kiss you upon your lips in kind. Ace's kiss was fierce- all around passionate and a bit salty to the taste. Deuce's, on the other hand, combated Ace's kiss on the opposing spectrum. A sensation of overwhelming sweetness and a gentle touch was the kiss Deuce gave to you, truly displaying how much the male had changed at heart. You brought both of the boy's into a hug, the pair now settling within your arms. As the sun began to fully disappear beyond the reaches of the park, there was one thing you had to admit. This day had been filled with sugar, a bit of spice...but was all around nice. And the magic was just beginning. 💫

((Hey hey, lovely Readers! I've got something a little different for y'all today! Thought I'd switch things up a bit and give you guys some extreme fluff with a cute little Disneyland writing! Props to @leviskokoro-main for the "idea". Enjoy~💖

[goji-pilled]

MK-S: Not a Dark Souls update.

One time, Klarissa’s multiverse travel had her land in a dimension she can only describe as “hellish”. The witch system was in place with a few minor differences from home:

Wishes could not be nearly as powerful or reality changing.

Domestication isn’t possible in this reality.

For the girls who know they’ll become witches in this reality, they view the previous difference as, potentially, the best part of the whole deal.

The world is roamed by man-eating creatures, things that can hide in the streets, in the clouds, on the sides of buildings: Cars vanish without a trace, only for scraps of metal and bone to be found nearby. Acidic rain happens at random times in isolated places…only for the doomed to realize that it’s not rain…it’s drool. And people are plucked from office cubicles, screaming as they are quickly pulled through a freshly broken window, in the same way that one might pluck a desired flavor from a bag of candy. And these creatures are wholly unrelated to Incubators, magical girls, or witches.

These things can’t be wished away and the dead can’t be revived so common wishes, that get accepted, are along the lines of “keep my family safe in our home”, “don’t let it be my dad who is the one eaten at work today”, or “give me the power to fight these monsters as best as I can”. To add extra salt on the wound, the incubators energy gains from what they do get, wouldn’t be worth the energy for more than a one way trip to Earth; the only reason they bothered at all was because this breed of incubator pitied mankind. Most of their main sales pitch for becoming a witch is summed up in this idea:

Save who you can, then save yourself through becoming a witch.

Klarissa was stuck in this dimension for about two and a half days. Phil was nonresponsive during this time for some reason. She saw many people come to brutal ends, and dueled some beast to a standstill while in her witch form, before the creature decided she wasn’t worth the haste and left…but not before it sucked a hiding civilian into its mouth leaping away as the screams started and ceased in almost the same moment. Other things she saw…she thinks even her mother Oktavia would be disturbed at the sight.

The first action of Phil when he started doing anything again was some of the loudest screaming Klarissa has ever heard come out of her hat, and she found herself in the bubble-like sphere that Phil surrounds her in during dimensional travel. When it faded, she was back home…sort of: she was in her home dimension, but she’d been dropped off in the city park under a tree.

When Klarissa arrived home to the Kanames’ house, she was immediately embraced by Madoka and Homura for worrying them. Madoka went to call Oktavia, and Homura went to compare wrist watches with Klarissa. (As a precaution of space-time shenanigans, Klarissa is required to wear a digital wristwatch with the date as part of it when multiverse traveling. This is then meant to be compared to an identical wristwatch Homura has, to see if there was any time speed up/down for Klarissa. A requirement for Klarissa to be allowed to do these multiverse travels, and she accepted as it’s one of the very few requirements they ask for for this.) The watches show only an 11 hour and 37 minute difference, with Klarissa being the one who spent less time away from home, than her home had spent with her absent. This is unusually long, as the difference is usually just two or three hours in either direction, if there was a difference at all. When Oktavia shows up, she’s fully ready to chew Klarissa out as she was not to be gone on such a trip for more than a day at most, especially not without their permission…but Madoka halts her rage and shows her that Klarissa seems to have been disturbed. When asked what she saw, she doesn’t want to go into it. All she wants is tight hugs, and to know her grandma will be safe at work. Hugs are given and Juno is given a call. Klarissa puts a pause on her extradimentional traveling for a while, ranging from at least several weeks to no more than one year (depending on reader interpretation of her character). When Phil is questioned about what happened, something big comes out of her hat. It could best be compared in shape to a leafless tree, though one made of bone or perhaps some form of chitinous exoskeleton. There were also several human-like eyes on this thing, and two long vertical mouths composed of several rows of teeth: in one the teeth were all human, the other a seemingly random mixture of teeth from random animals, not even all pointed ones. Klarissa has no idea what this is supposed to mean, nor what the liquid Void substance on it is. As per section 7 subsection 3 of the Homura and Mami multiverse and Phil precautionary act, this organic object was incinerated with prejudice.

MK-S: So, you may be wondering why Phil dropped Klarissa off in a place that would disturb her, and push her witch form combat to its limits. Was it some sort of lesson he wanted to teach his Lady? Could he have been trying to again hammer in the notion that in the multiverse, don’t bother trying to save anyone/everyone? Well, no. There’s two answers to the question, one meta (my reason for writing it), and then Phil’s reason.

My meta reason was that I needed some sort of disturbing place that was out of character for Phil to leave Klarissa (as a plot device for the upcoming reason), but it kinda escalated into a mini-story from there.

Phil’s reason for dropping Klarissa off there and then basically ghosting her is simple: He didn’t. Or rather, phrasing it like that wouldn’t be entirely accurate. He didn’t so much “drop Klarissa off” in that dimension, as much as he just “dropped Klarissa” in that dimension. Phil was jumped by a pack of primordial entities from before time, while he was transporting Klarissa. Imagine being suddenly attacked by a pack of wolves, and then dropping whatever it was you were carrying. Not sure if Phil would be akin to a human, another (lone) wolf, or a giant octopus in this metaphor though…and the combat/disassembly/assimilation…you know, the metaphor breaks down in ways beyond concepts we have words for, and into things we should NEVER have words for, so I’ll just recap: Phil got jumped by other Eldritch abominations, dropped Klarissa in a traumatizing nightmare realm (dimensional travel is strange, and the notion of “over there are the bad dimensions, but everything close to home is fine” doesn’t really apply), spent 2 and a 1/2 to 3 days fighting them (give or take a few eternities, combat outside of Time and space makes those measurements complicated), brought Lady Klarissa home and went “close enough” dropping her off in the park. Heck, he’s later impressed he dropped her off on the right continent, given how exhausted he was. He’s also quite content with Klarissa’s temporary hold on multiverse travel, as he needs time to mend his wounds…but not as much time as he needs in order to purge such entities that would dare attack him again. So he’ll be keeping himself busy for the weeks, months, or year (singular) it takes for Klarissa to mentally recover. Besides, time at home is good for her.

Hope this was a fun read!

Wow another one that is incredibly disturbing! How nice!

[ionlydatesassyelves]

mods are asleep post more gay drabbles it's the only flavor i can write

modern human au where L and Luigi are seperate people who have to deal with each other, and then they also have to deal with Dimentio. because that's the only other flavor i can write.

((will format correctly in the morning because fuck tumblr mobile))

~~~~~

L wasn't entirely certain when a street performer had set up a magic show in front of his mechanic shop, but it didn't seem to be driving away business, so for now he ignored it. For several weeks, actually, he did a stellar job of ignoring it.

The performer stopped him one day on his way into work, sauntered into his path before the crowd with a dazzling smile. He conjured a rose for L and offered it with a bow, the trick met with cheers and applause.

L scoffed and moved to step around the attention whore, but his path was blocked again. "Not one for flowers, then?" the shorter man sang. He pulled the scarf from his own neck, wrapped it around the delicate rose, and pulled it away with a flourish.

He now held a bouquet of rusty wrenches and screwdrivers wrapped in colorful paper.

L couldn't help it, he laughed, the whole crowd laughing and applauding as well. The man bowed again, and this time L accepted the gift, and he was at last allowed to go on his way.

He pulled the bouquet apart once he entered the shop--not excellent tools, gathered probably from the dump, but the gesture was still hilarious. Once L had unwrapped the paper, he found a card nestled among the tools. No number to call, no elaboration on the givers identity. Only a name.

"Dimentio"

L tried very hard not to hope Dimentio would be hanging around outside his shop again, but he couldn't help being glad to see the thin boy stood up on a box and talking excitedly to the crowd before him.

L elected to spare five minutes to be late for work and watch a couple of Dimentio's tricks. Dimentio smiled when he spotted him in the crowd, asked him to pick a card at one point and summoned it from a little girls knit cap. The girl was delighted, her mother twofold, and she let the little girl hand Dimentio a sizeable tip at the end of the show.

L was more than disappointed he couldn't spare the cash to at least tip Dimentio. He knew Luigi often liked to leave a parting gift for hard working performers that had made him smile, and Dimentio had done that two days in a row. Which was not an easy feat, given L's situation.

The thought pressed firmly at the back of his mind all day. Eventually, he decided to take an early lunch and bolted to catch Dimentio outside.

The performer was gathering tricks and props into a worn duffle bag by this hour, moving onto a different spot. L called out to him before he could go, and Dimentio seemed surprised to see him again.

"I'm afraid you've missed the encore," he teasingly replied, slinging his bag over his shoulder.

"Nah, I got enough of your flashy tricks, thanks," L returned. He jogged over to meet Dimentio on the corner, and it was more apparent without the box that Dimentio stood more than a full head shorter than him. It was also more apparent he wasn't wearing shoes.

L frowned down at the sidewalk, taking in the boys pale toes and wondering if he was okay. It wasn't the coldest of the year yet, but it was still far from warm.

Dimentio shifted in place, seemingly eager to get on. He smiled at L anyway. "To what do I owe the pleasure then?"

L ran a hand through his messy hair. He was never very good at this. "You eat yet?"

There was a laugh, and L smiled again. It was different than the stage laugh. Dimentio choked on it a little suddenly, and his voice cracked on the end of it. "Was than an invitation?"

L snorted and jerked his head over his shoulder, walking back towards his shop. He was thrilled that Dimentio followed him.

There wasn't much to the shop, but there was a small, worn couch tucked away in a tiny back room where L could retreat to relax and warm up a little. Dimentio left his pack at the door and happily settled onto the couch with his legs folded under him. L tried not to sit too close to him, but it was difficult to not squish in the small space.

L brewed hot coffee for them both and they shared the sack lunch L had brought for the day. He tried to get Dimentio to eat the whole sandwich, insisting he could make something later, but Dimentio refused to touch more than half of anything.

They sat and talked in the warm little nook for some time longer than they probably should have, but eventually Dimentio went on his way.

L didn't mean to go on and on to Luigi every time this happened afterwards, but eventually Luigi encouraged him to take enough food for L and Dimentio to both have a decent lunch. Gradually, their dates became routine enough that Dimentio swung by the shop even when he had been performing elsewhere that morning.

L didn't quite realize he had a crush until the afternoon the windchill picked up and he gave Dimentio an old coat. It swallowed him up, but he had thanked L sincerely, and stood on tiptoes to give L a kiss on the cheek before he left that day. L didn't want to admit he had spent the rest of the day finding his fingers softly touching the spot, but he did.

It was three dates after that when L finally worked up the nerve to scoot closer to Dimentio on the couch and kiss him fully. Dimentio was so quick to slide his arms around L and return the deep kiss. They wound up making out on the couch, and it wouldnt be the first time.

------

Luigi got to meet Dimentio three weeks after the first time L had invited him to lunch. Usually he kept to the quiet, shambly part of the city, but he'd been visiting a friend on that end of town and ran into Luigi on his way to work, mistaking him for L. They had laughed at the mix up, but Luigi was glad to meet Dimentio at last, and Dimentio was thrilled to discover L had been talking about him.

Dimentio had neglected to tease L about it later that day, but when Luigi told him that night his boyfriend was indeed very cute, the flowers and lovebites L had to come home with suddenly made sense.

Luigi and L both began to look forward to Dimentio brightening their days, either in the silly gifts he would conjure for Luigi before work, or the warm kisses he snuck around L's shop to steal. It wasn't uncommon for Dimentio to come up in conversation while Luigi and L ate dinner together.

Winter rolled around, and they began to wonder more and more where Dimentio called home. If he was safe at night, or at least warm.

L stayed up later pacing some nights, wondering where Dimentio might be and if he was okay. Some days his make out session with the preformer turned into something more, and L could give Dimentio an hour or more of warmth and comfort. But Dimentio always left into the bitter cold with L's old jacket pulled tight around his thin form, bare feet against the cold sidewalk, but no less a spring in his step or spark in his smile.

L began working late and hoarding spare change, cutting little treats for himself where he could to gather up a little bit of extra cash. When Luigi finally asked what he was up to, if he needed help with anything, L admitted he wanted to get Dimentio something warm to wear. At least some new shoes. Luigi gave him the sweetest, warmest smile, and began working overtime as well, adding extra tips to L's fund.

L was beyond tickled the day he finally could lead Dimentio into his worn shop hand in hand. After they ate and exchanged their usual quips, L reached behind the couch and handed Dimentio a very large plastic bag. They couldn't do much to wrap the gift, but Dimentio took it with a bewildered grin. "What is this, now?"

"Call it an early Christmas..." L muttered, sitting back and trying to appear as casual as possible. He was sitting on pins and needles, praying Dimentio didn't notice.

Dimentio eagerly set to digging through the bag, but his motions soon slowed. He pulled out two large, fluffy sweaters in bright colors, and a wool scarf with matching hat, holding all the items in a bundle against his chest. He turned and gave L a shaky smile, like he was waiting for the punchline. "...is this for me?"

"Yeah, it's for you," L almost laughed. "Don't want you to fuckin blow away in the wind out there."

Dimentio turned very quickly back to the gifts in his lap. He looked like he might cry. He busied himself instead pulling the box from the bottom of the bag and opening the lid with a quiet gasp.

"They're a little worn..." L apologized as Dimentio ran his fingers thoughtfully over the black boots. "We found them at a thrift store but, uh... I really didn't want you to freeze..."

Dimentio smiled, and choked a little. "I love them." he said quietly.

He tried them on, and they were a size too big, but only half a size with the colorful wool socks Luigi had tucked into the box. They were big and bulky especially since Dimentio didn't bother lacing them, but they somehow suited him when he kicked his legs back and forth on the couch, and L couldn't help smiling.

He pressed his face into L's shoulder and wrapped his arms tightly around the larger man. "I love them," he repeated.

L tried not to respond "I love you too."

Dimentio hung out around the shop the rest of the day, leaving only when L locked up for the night. L insisted he might as well come over for dinner, but Dimentio fidgeted anxiously and insisted he couldn't owe L any more favors.

L wrapped both arms around Dimentio and kissed him slow and deep. "You don't owe me. Just stay safe, okay?"

Dimentio winked, adjusting his scarf around his face to hide the bright blush coloring his cheeks. "No promises."

L bit his lip, but he steeled his nerves and tightening his grip before dimentio's fingers could slip from his. He had to know. "You got somewhere warm to sleep right?"

Dimentio gave L a peck on the cheek and squeezed his hand. "I'll find somewhere."

And then he left.

L couldn't sleep that night.

The thought of Dimentio huddled in the freezing streets was keeping him up. He had already been sick with worry, but previously he could chalk it up to paranoia. Now it had been confirmed, Dimentio was homeless. It wasn't fair. Nothing was in this awful city, but that especially tore L up.

Four times, L almost asked Luigi if he could invite Dimentio to stay. But every time he tried to come up with a reason, he felt like he was asking to keep a dog, which was both insulting to Dimentio's independence and throwing another burden on Luigi. L hated both of those things, so four times, he shut his mouth.

The fifth time had been an impromptu trip to the grocery store, stocking up on essentials. L had commented idly on people looking like they were preparing for the apocalypse.

"Its probably the storm," Luigi had carelessly reminded him.

"...what storm?" L asked, face melting to horror.

Luigi sighed a little as he compared their cart to their list. "I told you, there's supposed to be a blizzard rolling in tomorrow. They say the streets are going to freeze. Oh--remind me to leave the water running tonight, we're fucked if the pipes freeze too."

L couldn't help his knee jerk response. "Dimentio's homeless."

Luigi's eyes flew up to meet L's, wide and shocked. He knew what that meant. "What?" he asked anyway.

"Dimentio's homeless," L repeated, his voice shaking. "He's out on the streets, I don't think he has anywhere to go."

Luigi took that in for about three seconds, then took a deep, steadying breath. "Let's hurry up here and get this home, then we'll see if we can find him."

-----

Luigi almost wrecked the car when L spotted Dimentio from the passengers seat and just jumped out onto the sidewalk. L ignored the frustrated scolding behind him and bolted towards the performer.

Dimentio had taken shelter from the falling snow on a high slope beneath a bridge, but when L climbed up he discovered that Dimentio was already shivering. He was bundled in several layers, but his nose and ears were already a pale shade of blue.

"Get up, you're coming with us," L said sternly, not waiting for a reply as he grabbed Dimentio's bag and slung it over his own shoulder.

"N-no, L, it's... d-d-don't--" Dimentio tried to stutter out a protest, but he was shivering too hard in the howling wind.

His effort was interrupted by L scooping him up off the ground--all the clothes put together probably weighed more than Dimentio himself. "I don't want to hear it. We're going home."

Dimentio didn't argue with that.

Luigi had managed to stop the car nearby when L struggled back down the hill with Dimentio in his arms. L didn't think much about taking the backseat on the ride home and holding Dimentio in his lap, but the preformer didn't seem very intent on moving, so no one questioned it.

Granted the rickety apartment wasn't much, especially for three people, but anything was better in a blizzard. Luigi took Dimentio immediately into the bathroom and showed him how the shower worked, told him to get clean and more importantly, warm. He left Dimentio a soft towel and some of his own cozy pajamas, and Dimentio still seemed at a loss for words.

While he was in the shower, Luigi made a warm soup for dinner and L busied himself cleaning space in his own room for Dimentio's things and piling spare blankets onto his bed.

Dimentio arrived in Luigi's pajamas and the coat he'd been wearing, and L traded it for a softer hoodie. He was still a little uncertain, but he seemed happier and at least the color of a healthy human again.

The three piled on the couch together and ate soup out of mismatched bowls, watching TV as they chatted late into the night.

Before they headed to bed, Luigi got Dimentio to gather up what little clothes he owned so he could wash them in the morning. Luigi also produced a spare toothbrush for Dimentio they "happened" to have, and certainly hadn't bought that day hoping and praying they would find Dimentio tonight.

Dimentio was grinning ear to ear by the time everyone was getting ready to settle into bed. L insisted Dimentio keep his bed tonight, and went to the couch himself, but the preformer clung to him and bashfully asked if L would be willing to stay.

They snuggled into bed together, squished in the small space, but warm and happy to hold onto each other. They whispered in the dark for several hours before falling asleep, sneaking in soft kisses here and there.

The storm did end up snowing them in for several days, and Dimentio was happier to be in the house with each passing hour. Dimentio taught them both several card tricks, and Luigi taught Dimentio new, flashy ways to shuffle the deck. They traded stories about the ongoing struggle against the upper class, laughed over preparing meals, and snuggled together in the quiet.

On the fifth day, news reports began to state that the worst of the storm had passed, and streets should begin to get clear. The weather in the early morning channels also seemed to indicate that the danger of freezing outside would be gone.

L found Dimentio staring out of a window soon following the newscast, watching the snow fall on the empty streets outside. L sat behind him and slid his arms around Dimentio's thin waist, and the smaller man leaned back against his chest. "So I have bad news," L began with a sigh.

"Mm." was all Dimentio said.

"The truth is, we've kidnapped you," he announced grimly.

Dimentio snorted, and L could just make out his smile in the window reflection. "Is that so?"

"Unfortunately, yes, you've actually been a hostage this entire time," L went on in a deadpan, sarcastic tone. He propped his chin on Dimentio's head, and a sigh ruffled his curly hair. "I'm afraid you're going to have to stay forever."

Dimentio's grin crept a little wider. His hands wandered up and rested over L's. "Unfortunate indeed... and if I were to refuse?"

"Well, Luigi gets attached easily, so you might make him cry," L informed him.

"Hmm. Tragic." Dimentio hummed. "You're not one for tears, are you?"

L shrugged carelessly. "Nah. I'd just drag you back here. What do you weigh, like eight pounds?"

"Probably six," Dimentio agreed. He squeezed the toned muscle of L's forearms latched around his waist and teased "Hardly a struggle, even for a weak shrimp like you."

L laughed into Dimentio's hair, and squeezed the performer tighter against him. He pressed a kiss to the top of Dimentio's head and murmured "I want you to stay. We both do."

Dimentio bit his lower lip - a failed attempt to control the excited grin on his face. His hands squeezed awkwardly around L's wrists, and he sucked in a short, thrilled gasp. "I'd love to," he managed.

[lawnierose]

“Potter, Harry”

Whispers broke out throughout the Great Hall. All eyes seemed to follow the raven haired boy that walked to the stool. Some staff had waited years for this moment. Students, some of whom grew up hearing about the Boy-Who-Lived, couldn’t believe that they were seeing their hero. Some students had no clue what was going on but were caught up in the moment and begging those around them for an explanation. A few commented that the boy looked fairly small for his age. Minerva Mcgonagall pursed her lips at seeing the child again after ten years apart. She had to hold her typical stoicism, instead of wrapping up the boy she had adopted as her grandchild in her arms. She hated everyday that she had let Albus talk her into leaving him with those muggles. She knew Albus had caused her to forget their address mere moments after they had left the baby behind. Meanwhile, Severus Snape was sneering from where he sat at the head table. All he saw was a child who looked nearly identical to one of his greatest tormentors. A bully who had somehow stolen his first and best friend. He watched curiously as the hat was placed upon the small child.

One minute…

Two minutes…

Five minutes...The boy was a hatstall.

Ten minutes… Murmurs could be heard rumbling all around the Hall.

Twelve minutes… The brim of the hat parted and a collective breath was held.

“Headmaster, Heads of Houses, I need you to bring the child to the antechamber. I will sort the rest then the Deputy Headmistress will bring me to join you.”

There was a cacophony of noise as students had never heard of something like this happening. Minerva silenced the room with a bang from her wand. Pomona Sprout collected the child and escorted them from the Hall. Albus, Severus, and Filius Flitwick followed the pair. Severus turned to Albus with an incredulous look and spoke in hushed tones.

“What is going on, Headmaster? How is the Potter brat already causing problems?”

“Severus, my boy, I can tell you I haven't a clue what is going on. Are you planning to place your old grudge on the boy already?”

Meanwhile, the child was looking around in bewilderment, confusion, but also a begrudging acceptance. The adults in the room paying attention, noticed that Harry’s eyes seemed far older than the eleven years the boy actually was. All four tried to ask him questions but he remained stubbornly silent. Fifteen minutes went by, as they could hear the sorting continue in the other room. They heard Minerva start the feast before she joined them with the Sorting Hat in hand. She set the hat on a table in the room and conjured a comfortable chair. The other professors did the same, but she noticed Harry was still standing so she conjured a second chair by her side and motioned for him to sit. After he did, she turned back to the Hat.

“What is going on?”

“Why were you unable to sort the boy?”

“What in Merlin’s name is the problem?”

All of the adults tried asking their questions at the same time. They promptly shut up as they realized they were nearly shouting over each other. The Hat let out a put upon sigh, and if an inanimate object could glare they could all feel it.

“If you will all be quiet, I will tell you what the devil is going on. The child has multiple individuals in their head. Unlike the last time this happened, exactly twenty years ago, these multiples will not be sorted into one singular house. I regret to inform you that I sensed six individuals. Young Potter must simply be a child of Hogwarts, something that has not happened in two hundred years.”

The five adults sat back in stunned silence. Magical Multiple Disorder was incredibly rare. The person who was referenced from twenty years ago was sitting in the room as one of the heads of houses and knew intimately what caused that particular disorder to arise. Severus and Minerva looked at each other in horror as what the Hat said fully materialized in their minds. Six multiples, that meant Potter had gone through some of the worst abuse one could receive and all before age eleven. As one, they glared at the Headmaster. Minerva was the first to speak, and Albus had gone pale at the sheer loathing he could see in her eyes.

“Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbeldore, give me one good reason I shouldn’t hex you into oblivion right this instant. Explain yourself or I will permanently transfigure you into a cat scratch post.”

“Now dear…”

His response was cut off as a nasty stinging hex hit him in the forehead.

“Don’t you ‘now dear’ me you meddling old goat. You know what, sit there in silence. I am sure young Potter can tell us what we need to know.”

With that the headmaster was hit with four silencing spells of such power he couldn’t break through them. Although, if Albus was being honest with himself he most definitely deserved this. He had obviously failed Harry Potter for the child to arrive with six multiple forms. His eyes widened as he remembered what that truly meant. It was with great effort that he did not vomit as a wave of guilt swept over him. He focused back on everyone else in the room as Minerva asked her first question.

“Harry, do you know what the Hat is talking about? I am so sorry that we weren’t there for you but I promise we will do everything we can to help you. I couldn’t check on you, because this meddlesome man took my memory of where we left you. I wanted so badly to look in on you. Please, will you let us help.”

Harry took a moment to study the faces around him. He saw guilt, concern, anger, and despair, but he was happy that there was no pity. He took a deep breath and as he let it out, he also shifted. The adults gasped as suddenly a near identical twin to the child’s mother stood in front of them now. Severus went pale as a ghost and had to slam his Occlumency shields into place just to stay cognizant.

“Hello, I am Azalea, and I am our Nurturer. Harry is our Face, but he needs a moment. Yes, we know what is going on. After Hagrid took us to Gringotts, we pickpocketed our key and went back in. We met with our account manager and got recommendations for books to help us learn about what we are and the wizarding world in general. Headmaster, you are lucky that you never took money from us or had anything to do with those ridiculous books written about Harry Potter. My relatives are about to be bankrupt, by paying back what you set up to send them for my care. The writers and publishers of those books are also about to meet a lawsuit like they have never seen before.

Obviously, you all seem to know what causes this Disorder. My relatives were the absolute worst sort of Muggles…”

Apparently, Albus hadn’t fully learned his lesson as he finally broke the silencing charms around him. He proved just how senile he was going by daring to interupt Azalea.

“My dear girl, they are your family. You had to stay with them for your own safety.”

He flinched back as a dagger whipped past his nose and buried itself in the wood behind him. He stared wide eyed at the new form in front of him. Where just a moment ago had been a thirteen year old miniature of Lily, now sat a fifteen year old female version of Sirius. She was scarily similar to Andromeda or Bellatrix Black, if either woman had ever delved into muggle goth-punk fashion that is. Black curls ending in blue tips were pulled up into a messy mohawk. The girl was twirling another dagger between her fingers and glaring at Dumbledore.

“Feck off ya ol’ cunt. Safe, ya think ay ‘as safe with dem bloody rat bastards. I was created at four years old. FOUR ya fecking prick! I’s Zoey by the by, the Protector. If youse the bastard lef’ me ‘er, youse jus’ as much at fault. Argh! Fine. Harry wants to speak again.”

“Sorry about that. Zoey is quite aggressive and vulgar, and we would be here all night if I let her continue. As Zoey said, she appeared at the age of four, as did Freak and Jamie, who you will meet momentarily. Jamie is our Child, Freak is the Masochist. There is also Holly, the Slut. She appeared at age nine. Our Uncle decided beatings and starvation weren’t punishment enough. She and Freak are unique in that they would black certain things out for the rest of us. Those memories remain muted to the rest of us. Despite our collective mind, if you want details you will have to request those come forward. Be warned if you do that, we will probably slip into our Child form and need care for the rest of the night.”

The adults decided they did need to know more. First, they asked Freak to the forefront. Professor Sprout had to conjure a bucket which she immediately filled with the contents of her stomach. Freak was approximately sixteen and a mass of corded muscle. Over that muscle and covering his skin was crisscrossed dozens of scars. You could see them because all Freak wore was a pair of ripped sweatpants that ended at the knee. Roped scars covered his chest, back, and arms. The adults could see words; freak, monster, and whore, carved into his flesh at various points. It seems Freak had taken every wound and what it left behind onto his form. His size came from the sheer level of strength needed to survive all that had been done. While listening to Freak present his memories, Pomona and Minerva were brought to tears. Severus ended up summoning calming droughts for every adult present. Then they met Holly, who is around fourteen years old. She gave all of them appraising looks before informing them that her stories would have to come another time. The collective group was drained, hungry, and getting tired. The adults realized how late it had gotten. They decided Albus would make an announcement in the morning, and he went to give the closing speech and dismiss the students. As soon as he was gone, Holly told them Jamie was coming. The shift revealed a four year old boy, who was too skinny for that age. He had a stuffed black dog and a blanket that Minerva recognized as the one he had been left with that fateful night. Her heart nearly broke as he reached out to her.

“Nana Minnie, up?”

[uppastthejelliclemoon]

Could you tell us more about your headcanon next gen kittens? I loved their appearances in that older!Munkustrap story you wrote, and I'd love to know more about them!

Absolutely!!

Anthea and Charon: Hestia and Tumblebrutus’ kittens

- Charon’s older by a year, and he’s very protective over his little sister. Anthea loves her big brother very much, and the two of them are absolutely inseparable. 

- Anthea definitely takes after her dad, and loves learning how to do all the acrobatic flips and tumbles that he does, and she’s very bubbly and happy!

- Charon takes more after his mom, and he’s a bit quieter than his sister and is more introverted. He loves his cuddles though, and as a kitten, he would refuse to leave his mother and father’s sides. He’d always have to be carried around, and if it was Hestia or Tumble holding him, it was most likely Tugger, because his mane is ideal for kittens to snuggle into.

- Tumble is absolutely the best dad, and he always takes time for both his kittens, because he loves them both so much and wants to spend as much time as he can with his family. He takes them on adventures around the Junkyard, and Hestia brings them to Bustopher’s clubs to visit their great-uncle. 

- Charon and Anthea are very in tune with each other, and since they both have their mom’s magic, they’re able to know each other’s feelings. They’re not as magically in tune as Coricopat and Tantomile, but they know each other well enough without having to talk to each other. 

Tate and Ramona: Jemima’s kittens

- Ramona was the first kitten that Jemima found on the street. She was hunting through some garbage, and Jemima brought her back to the Junkyard. Demeter nearly cried because SHE HAS A GRANDDAUGHTER NOW and Jemima became very happy with her little girl.

- Not long after, she found Tate. He was sick, tossed out by his humans once they found out that one of the children had an allergy. Jemima brought him back to the Junkyard, and, with the help of Jenny, helped him get better.

- Ramona really loves her brother, but Tate is a very distrusting cat. After what happened with his humans, he’s hesitant to interact with others, so he really only talks to his mom and sister. He does talk to Charon and Anthea, and occasionally with Evangeline and Felicity, but he prefers to stay quiet.

- Jemima really loves being a mom, and she sings her kittens to sleep every night, which always helps to soothe Ramona’s nightmares. She gets nightmares from being on the streets, so this actually helps her form a bond with her Auntie Jojo! She really likes Jubilee.

- Tate forms a close bond with Hestia, and Hestia loves her nephew very much. Jubilee and Hestia are just the best aunts to the twins (even though they’re not really twins, that’s what everyone calls them!)

Kace, Tallulah, Rhiannon: Tantomile and Rumpleteazer’s kittens

- After the “Seven Kittens in a Hat” event, Mistoffelees realized that he could help Jellicles who couldn’t have kittens of their own.

- He took a bit of Tanto’s fur and a bit of Teazer’s, and put it into his hat. He then pulled out a tom kitten who was a copy of Tanto, a queen kitten who was a copy of Teazer, and a final queen kitten who was a perfect mix of them both. 

- Kace, even though he looks identical to Tantomille, actually takes after Teazer the most, and he loves spending time with his Uncle Jerrie. He’s a very chaotic boy, and Tantomile’s the only one who can get him to calm down.

- Tallulah is a mix of both her moms, just like her fur. She’s got Teazer’s chaotic streak, but she’s also got the braincell of the triplets, so she knows when to not make chaos in the Junkyard. 

- Of course, Rhiannon takes after Tantomile. She’s the calmest of her siblings and cousins, and prefers to meditate with her mom and Uncle Cori. She loves spending time at the library with her Auntie Jojo.

Jax: George and Etcetera’s kitten

- Jax is a sweet angel baby boy and 10/10 would die for him. 

- Etcetera loves her son with all her heart, and George is the proudest dad in the entire world. Jax loves his mom and dad, and he’s just such a sweetheart. He’s the best kitten, and is happy just to have his mom and dad spending time with him.

- Like George, Jax is very excitable, and he is a very friendly boy. He can and will run and hug absolutely anyone who comes into the Junkyard. He gives Munkustrap heart attacks when he just runs off to hug any random cat (or dog).

- He may or may not have a ridiculously massive crush on Zephyr, and he just turns into an absolutely stuttering mess whenever Zephyr looks his way. 

- He really loves spending time with his cousins and his Auntie Hestia, but he really, really loves going on adventures with his granddad. Skimble sometimes takes him to the train station, and they ride the railway together. Skimble tells Jax stories, and he absolutely loves hearing about all the adventures he’s gone on. 

Zephyr: Cassandra and Alonzo’s kitten

- He looks a lot like Cassandra, with a bit of white mixed into his brown fur. 

- He’s very slinky, just like his father, but he has not graduated fully into the Slinky Bastard form. He’s getting there, though. 

- He’s very good at controlling his emotions and not letting them get the better of him. He’s very proper, and occasionally can come off as a bit aloof and mean before others get to know him.

- That being said, he’s absolutely HOPELESS when it comes to his feelings for Jax. He’s very stubborn, but as soon as he sees Jax jumping all over the place and just being his usual, excitable, adorable self, he’s a goner. He spends most nights venting to either his mom or his dad about “stupid Jax and his adorable laugh and his funny jokes and his warm hugs and DAD STOP LAUGHING AT ME”

- Zelda also teases him CONSTANTLY about it, but then he gets back at her by teasing her about her crush on Kace so it’s okay. 

Zelda and Thalia: Victoria and Plato’s kittens

- Zelda’s older than Thalia by two years, so she and Zephyr are attached at the hip. Both girls see Zephyr as another brother. 

- Zelda’s a bit better with her emotions, so she’s at least able to have a civil conversation with Kace, so she’s getting somewhere with her feelings!!

- Thalia is blind. But, to the surprise of her parents, she has magic, inherited from her grandmother on Victoria’s side, the same queen who is the reason for Mistoffelees having magic. 

- So, with the help of her magic, Thalia can “see” the auras of other cats, and that’s how she’s able to get around. This just makes Zelda a little extra protective of her, but Thalia knows that her sister loves her. 

- Plato is absolutely in love with his girls, and he cried when they were both born because he’s a dork. Victoria teaches them how to dance while Plato just watches proudly because he’s the best dad. 

@queencurlycrown PLEASE PUT YOUR HEADCANONS FOR EVA AND FELI!!!

(also whoops looks like I have a large amount of ocs now... did not mean for that to happen but oH WELL)

[quicksilversquared]

Supervillain Backstabber: Chapter 2

Lila Rossi had an understanding of sorts with Paris’ head supervillain, Hawkmoth. He would give her powers to take down Ladybug; she would try to get the Miraculous for him. She assumed that their agreement would also grant her immunity from being targeted by any of his other akumas. When it turns out that that isn’t the case…

Well, Lila never forgives a slight. And she WILL get her revenge.

links in the reblog

-----------

The next part of Lila's plan unfortunately required more stakeouts on top of rooftops. Now that they were reaching the hottest part of the summer and the sun was beating down overhead, all she wanted to do was find an air-conditioned building and hide inside of it all day. Either that, or escape to the beach and spend most of the day splashing in the water.

But she wasn't going to do that. No, Lila had a plan, and she intended to stick to it.

Hiding out on the rooftop of the Grand Paris was both harder and more exasperating than Lila had expected it to be. She had to dress up to make it pass the doorman, work her way up to the rooftop, and then shed the gaudy, bulky parts of her disguise in order to effectively hide in the foliage on the roof, where everyone who had half a brain cell knew that Chloe always waited with her bee-light during akuma battles, waiting for the superheroes to come give her the Bee Miraculous. It didn't happen often- Ladybug and Chat Noir tended to take care of akumas on their own most of the time, and when they didn't they seemed to favor the temporary superheroes who weren't the most spoiled brat in all of Paris- but it did happen on occasion.

And Lila had to wait for that. With every hot, humid, sweaty, uncomfortable day that Lila spent on that rooftop, her anger grew. If Hawkmoth had just managed to honor their partnership, as strange as it was- if Ladybug had just kept her nose out of it and not made Lila into an akuma in the first place- if- if-

She should have been reaping the rewards of having most of the school wrapped around her pinky finger right now, attending picnics and invited to pool parties and sleepovers every day. But instead, Lila was sitting on a rooftop, trying not to attract any attention.

They were all going to pay for this.

Each akuma fight made her sit up and take notice. With every boring, underpowered, uncreative akuma that came out, she slumped. Chloe wouldn't be needed for those.

And then came D-Day. An akuma that was just a little too much for Ladybug and Chat Noir alone. Chloe cheered when she spotted Chat Noir heading for the Grand Paris, and Lila rolled up onto the balls of her feet, making sure that her hat and sunglasses were firmly in place. They would hide her face from view, and the long ponytail that she had pulled her hair into instead of her usual three-part style would keep her identity safe.

She was ready. She had to be. Thankfully, Chat Noir seemed to be in a hurry.

"Catch!" he yelled as he touched down for a moment, tossing a small box at Chloe. She nearly fumbled it. "Transform and meet us near the Eiffel Tower!"

Chloe nodded eagerly, opening the box. Something round and yellow popped out, but Lila knew that her target- the bee comb- was still in the box. With Chloe distracted by the yellow blob and Chat Noir already heading off, Lila had her chance. Popping up, she sprinted with all of her might across the rooftop. Her muscles complained after being still for so long, but Lila ignored them as she reached out and grabbed the box, pinning the comb down with her thumb as she ripped the Miraculous out of an unsuspecting Chloe's hands.

"Stop!" she heard Chloe scream. "Come back here right now! Thief!"

Up ahead, Chat Noir paused mid-air, turning around. Lila didn't wait to see what his reaction was. Instead, she shoved the comb into her hair, calling out the phrase that Chloe had oh-so-helpfully shared with the world during her superhero vlogs.

"Pollen, transform me!"

This rush of magic felt much more potent than her akuma transformations. Sting grinned and took to the air, her wings- why Queen Bee didn't have them, she didn't know and didn't care- beating furiously. Before Chat Noir could fully turn around, Sting was off, dodging between buildings until she reached street level. Once she reached an alley, she detransformed. Lila slid the Miraculous back into the box and pocketed it, smirking the whole way.

Phase Two was complete. Hawkmoth was going to regret ever crossing her, and then, once he fell... well, the superheroes of Paris wouldn't be far behind.

 ----------------

 The news was all over Paris: the Bee Miraculous had been stolen from Chloe Bourgeois. No one knew who had done it, or why. After the escape, the new Bee hadn't been seen.

Public opinion was mixed, Alya had texted Lila. Some people were worried that someone connected to Hawkmoth had stolen the extra Miraculous. Some thought it was a foreign curiosity-seeker, because who else would risk the wrath of Ladybug and Chat Noir once they were found?

Others, much to Lila's surprise, were of the opinion that someone taking Chloe's Miraculous was long overdue. After all, she hadn't exactly been picked so much as she had taken the Miraculous for herself, and now she had at least a little experience as part of the superhero team, so Ladybug and Chat Noir kept using her. She wasn't much of a hero, particularly outside of the superhero suit. Whoever had taken it had to be better, right?

Most people were holding out to see what the new Bee would be like before they formed their opinion. After all, they hadn't joined the superheroes during that fight.

The other news- which Lila had already heard, because it was impossible not to- was that the mayor had dedicated a special police force to finding the thief and getting Chloe's Miraculous back. They were going over the video footage, trying to pick out any distinguishing features.

It was a really good thing that Lila had been wearing an outfit that she had gotten from a thrift store and had been able to toss. Her mom wouldn't recognize her, and neither would any of her classmates.

She let the fervor die down for a few days, then took the Miraculous out again. Once again, the yellow orb formed and a small figure appeared in it. It frowned.

"You aren't my Queen."

"I'm your new owner. The last one was inadequate." Lila surveyed the small being. From Chloe's videos, she was assuming that this was the bee kwami, aka Pollen. "And I'm going to defeat Hawkmoth."

Pollen frowned. "Then are you going to join Ladybug and Chat Noir?"

"No." Lila couldn't help the dark scowl that flashed over her face. She rushed to hide it, though, because this Pollen could be a valuable source of information if she played her cards right. "They only battle the akumas. I've spent the entire summer up on rooftops, tracking down the source of the akumas. And I've found it."

Pollen gasped. "You found- you found Hawkmoth?"

"Right. Unlike Ladybug and Chat Noir, I actually put in the effort to find him. And I'm going to take him down." Lila leaned forward, fixing Pollen with a steady look. "And to win, I need you to tell me everything about this Miraculous."

 --------------------------

 Preparing for the final battle took another two weeks, weeks in which Lila spent transforming in the dead of the night and practicing her fighting on the rooftops. Pollen had told her about all of the Bee's powers- which really weren't that impressive, if Lila were being honest- and Lila needed them honed to perfection. During that time, her relationship with Pollen got tenser.

The kwami had never been happy about the thief of the Miraculous, which was ridiculous considering that Chloe had pretty much stolen it in the first place. Lila's refusal to work with Ladybug and Chat Noir had the kwami further on edge, particularly when Lila refused to divulge why she was so against working with the superheroes. Lila didn't trust the kwami with Hawkmoth's identity, either.

And then she had discovered that Pollen had to do whatever she commanded. There was an order in all of her questions now, and the kwami had to answer.

Unfortunately, Lila learned nothing new from that. Pollen had already told her about all of the Bee's powers that she could access, and knew only the same things as the public did about Hawkmoth and his powers. She hadn't been holding anything back.

Lila really, really wished that Chloe had had the Fox Miraculous instead. Now that she could do something with.

With the end of summer starting to appear on the horizon, Lila knew that she had to act if she wanted to take out Hawkmoth and the superheroes before school started up again. So she transformed and flew over to the Agreste manor one evening, readying herself for the fight. Ten minutes of looking in the windows and prowling around the outside of the mansion told her that Adrien was out- no doubt with his annoying lie-detecting sidekick- and Mr. Agreste was nowhere to be seen.

He had to be in his lair. She had come at a good time.

Sting flew over the manor, taking advantage of the falling gloom to keep herself out of sight. Her dark outfit would keep her hidden against the rooftops, for the most part, and if anyone noticed her hopefully they would assume that she was Chat Noir.

Not that it would matter soon enough.

It wasn't long at all before the tiny window that she had noticed before opened. Before any akuma could come out, Sting threw her trompo forward and smashed the rest of the glass before flying in as fast as she possibly could. She landed in front of a clearly startled Hawkmoth and smirked.

"I am Sting... and your time is up."

Hawkmoth staggered back a step in surprise, then grabbed his walking stick and pulled a sword out of it. His eyes narrowed. "How did you find-?"

Sting scoffed. "Like it was hard to find. I just had to figure out where the akumas were coming from."

Hawkmoth's smile was anything but friendly as he took a fighting stance. Sting mirrored him. "How smart of you. And why, may I ask, did you bother to track me down? No one else in Paris has even tried."

"Because you betrayed me, you no-good backstabber," Venom spat. "I helped you so many times, and what did that get me? Nothing but on the Miraculous Watch List! You still sent an akuma villain after me!"

Hawkmoth's eyes widened, then narrowed as he glared at her. "Volpina."

"It's Sting now, and I'm here to get my revenge! Now say good-bye to your Miraculous!"

As she charged, Sting saw Hawkmoth smirk. "I wouldn't be so sure about that if I were you, Sting."

Her trompo connected with his sword, and Sting yanked on the cord to pull Hawkmoth's weapon out of his grasp. Instead of it flying into her hand, Hawkmoth yanked back and Sting went stumbling towards him. Once she got close enough, his foot connected with her middle and she was flung back, hitting the wall hard and slumping to the floor.

No! She couldn't fail like this! She refused. She had trained and trained for two entire weeks. Sting refused to lose to a backstabbing traitor.

Grimacing, Sting pushed herself up. "You'll pay for this, Hawkmoth."

"I rather think I won't. But you will learn what happens to intruders in my lair." Hawkmoth pushed a button, and several panels on the wall opened. Something slid out, and it took Sting a moment to place them.

Missiles. What had she gotten herself into?

Sting's hand tightened around her weapon, and with a start she remembered that she was protected by a super-suit. If Ladybug and Chat Noir could get thrown around Paris every day and come out without a single scratch, she wasn't in danger from a couple measly missiles. They were meant as a distraction, and she would not fall for it.

Gritting her teeth, Sting charged again. This time, she did manage to pull the sword away from Hawkmoth. A second of trying told her that she couldn't break it, so instead she flung it out of the broken window with all of her might. Sting gave herself a mental pat on the back and turned back to attack Hawkmoth.

She never got there.

A click and a hiss were all the warning she got before a missile hit her right in the middle of the back and sent her flying into another wall. Sting scrambled away before it could explode, only to get caught by another, then another. Her head was spinning as she tried to crawl away.

How- how had it gone this wrong? What was happening?

"Little baby superhero thinks that she can go up against a supervillain and win," Hawkmoth taunted. "How foolish. All you've done is deliver another Miraculous straight into my hands."

"I'm no superhero," Sting spat, activating Venom. "And I'm not done with you yet-"

Hawkmoth laughed, just as another missile hit her. The trompo clattered across the floor, and Sting had a moment to panic before her head hit the wall yet again and the world started fading. "Big words from someone who couldn't even land a hit."

And then the world went black.

 --------------------------

 Lila woke up in a hospital bed. She blinked her eyes open and tried to glance around, but regretted it immediately.

Everything hurt.

"Don't try to move. You took some pretty hard hits."

Lila gasped and turned her head anyway. There, standing in one corner of the room, was a police officer. A nurse stood behind her, looking worried.

"Ladybug and Chat Noir rescued you," the police officer informed Lila, and she had to resist the urge to scowl. Of course they had. "They defeated Hawkmoth and brought the two of you in. And I have to inform you that you're wanted by the police for the thief of the Bee Miraculous."

Her brain was working a little slower than usual, but as soon as the police officer's words sunk in, Lila began to sniffle. "After all I did to track Hawkmoth down? The superheroes never would have found him if it weren't for me!"

The nurse looked uncomfortable, but the officer remained stoic. "You could have informed the superheroes of his location instead of stealing a Miraculous to try to take him on yourself. Ladybug and Chat Noir have testified that they knew nothing of your research or plans, and that they only found you and Hawkmoth because of the noise from his missiles. They said that your actions could have given Hawkmoth another Miraculous and endangered the entire city."

Lila turned up the tears. "I t-tried to tell them and they didn't want to listen to me! They said that I was just searching for fame and not to w-waste their time and now they're lying to save face. What other option did I have?"

"You'll have to tell that to the judge, I'm guessing." The police officer nodded to the nurse and then left. Lila stared after her, disbelieving.

They- they couldn't possibly still be thinking of going through with charging her, could they? That just- that wasn't fair at all! The public should be thanking her, admiring her bravery and commitment to taking Hawkmoth down.

"I'm sure the charges won't go far, dear," the nurse assured her once the door closed. "It's just that the mayor and his daughter always throw a fit over any perceived wrong. The public will be thrilled over Hawkmoth's defeat, and they won't care so much over how it happened."

Lila played up the sniffles. This was someone who she could get on her side. "I r-really hope you're right, because I just- I just wanted to help-"

"And you did. Hawkmoth is gone, and Ladybug and Chat Noir saved the day once again." The nurse smiled as she raised the bed so that Lila could sit up, missing the flash of anger that flashed over Lila's face. Of course the superheroes were getting all of the credit. That's just what they always did, didn't they? "I hear that it was a hard fight. I don't think that they landed in the hospital, though."

Lila did her best not to say anything to that.

"And your mom should be on the way," the nurse continued, oblivious to her internal rage. "She was getting briefed by the doctors on the care that you'll need once- well, once you're discharged. That certainly won't be right away."

That pulled Lila out of her increasingly murderous thoughts. Briefing? And she wasn't getting discharged right away? That didn't sound good. Her mom wouldn't need to be briefed for a little concussion, would she? "Care?"

This time, the nurse's wince wasn't hidden at all. "I- yes. You see, what the superheroes said probably happened was that your Miraculous got dislodged during that last throw, and you started detransforming as you hit the wall. And I'm sorry to tell you that there were some spinal injuries. If- if you're very lucky, with therapy, you may be able to walk again, but it could take quite a while and-"

This time, Lila's tears were real.

 ---------------------------

 Apparently the nurses thought that Lila wanted to watch the endless coverage about Hawkmoth's defeat, or maybe that was all that was on TV. Three days after she woke up, Lila was stuck watching some annoying news anchor chatter on about how Mr. Agreste's home was currently being combed from top to bottom and a second Miraculous had been confiscated by the superheroes, one belonging to Mayura, Hawkmoth's ally from Heroes Day. Mr. Agreste's secretary was being taken in for questioning on suspicion of assisting a supervillain. The investigation into Mrs. Agreste's disappearance was being more closely examined, and investigators hoped to get a break soon. The superheroes were on scene 24/7, of course, and had been joined by Rena Rouge, Queen Bee, and a little old superhero called Jade Turtle as they searched for clues.

The gushing over the superheroes was going to make Lila ill, and she only refrained from turning the TV's incessant chattering off because she needed to know what the current story was in order to make up her own. She would have to explain several things: why she had started hunting Hawkmoth down, why she hadn't just gone to Ladybug and Chat Noir instead of taking a Miraculous, and, to her classmates, why she had been in the city instead of in London or- actually, no, she had said that she was meeting with some people in Sweden now, she thought.

So far, it looked like Lila could keep on using the sob story that she had come up with upon waking up: that she had wanted to help the city, of course, and had spent weeks and weeks tracking down Hawkmoth's lair, only to have the superheroes brush off her claims all because she had been akumatized more often than the average person (because she was the victim of bullying, boo-hoo, and she was always so hurt when people called her a liar). She had taken things into her own hands, and bravely ventured into Hawkmoth's lair alone. She had wanted to call for backup, of course, but had been worried that Ladybug and Chat Noir would ignore her again, and now she had a permanent back injury as a result.

(It... maybe, possibly, might not be permanent. The doctors had said that she might be able to recover, but Lila had seen the looks they had exchanged. Full recovery wasn't likely.)

That story was what she had told the police, and the hospital staff, and her mom. As a result, Lila's mom was considering a lawsuit against the superheroes, since their "inaction" had pushed Lila into a situation where she had gotten super hurt.

Even if Lila couldn't take Ladybug and Chat Noir's Miraculous like she had initially planned, she could still drag their names through the mud.

That afternoon, a reporter came to visit Lila, and she happily fed Madam Chamack the story that she had come up with. She looked shocked at Lila's story, but dutifully recorded everything before promising Lila that she would get a proper interview with a camera once she had recovered and was out of the hospital. There would no doubt be a big special with all sorts of interviews once all of the investigations had died down, and Lila would feature heavily.

Frankly, she couldn't wait. She also couldn't wait to get out of the hospital and go home and eat some decent food and wear her own clothes again. She wanted to be able to have visitors- her classmates no doubt had heard what had happened and wanted to visit, but visitors were heavily restricted and it had taken even Madam Chamack several days to get permission to come in for a short visit. Lila wasn't sure if it was the hospital or the police who had made that decision, but it was annoying.

She was bored.

The next morning, Lila asked one of her nurses when she would get to leave. Instead of a straightforward answer or a fudging "I'll ask the doctors", she just frowned and shrugged.

Any answer would have been better than that. Maybe they were tired of asking, or maybe they knew as well as Lila did that between her condition and the police investigation, there was no real way to know when she would get out.

Right after that, another police officer came in for yet another official interview. Lila was getting tired of them by now- wasn't one enough?- but maybe it was because her mom had formally submitted the lawsuit against the superheroes the previous evening.

Lila smirked at that as she reached for the remote to turn on the TV. She wondered how the public had reacted to that, and to her interview. Madam Chamack had seemed shocked by Lila's story but accepted it easily enough, and Lila had to hope that the rest of Paris would be the same.

The superheroes would protest, no doubt, and try to contradict her story, but who was Paris going to believe: them, or the girl who had figured out who Hawkmoth was and tried to confront him on her own, leaving her with a serious injury?

(Lila hoped that she would get her legs back, she really, really did. It had only been a couple days and she wanted to walk, run, anything.)

"-continued developments on the Hawkmoth case," Madam Chamack was saying as the screen came to life. "Yesterday afternoon, Paris was shocked by accusations that Ladybug and Chat Noir ignored a tip-off from Lila Rossi, the girl who was injured during her face-off with Hawkmoth. There was even a lawsuit filed against them. Ladybug and Chat Noir refuted the claims yesterday evening, as expected."

"We knew nothing about Lila's efforts to find Hawkmoth, as we said before," Ladybug firmly told the camera in what was clearly a clip from the previous evening. "We take all potential leads very seriously. The police will have records of some of the tips that we received and subsequently investigated in the past, no matter how questionable the source or the accusation."

Madam Chamack's face filled the screen again. "We went to the police department, and while the files are closed due to the fact that they concern private citizens not accused of anything, the chief assured us that they do exist and that the superheroes followed up on all sorts of leads, even ones with absolutely no evidence. And then this morning, while Gabriel Agreste was being moved from a high-security ward at the hospital to the prison, we managed to get a shocking interview with him."

Slightly shaky interview footage filled the screen, with Mr. Agreste in the middle of a ring of burly police officers. There was a flash of Madam Chamack's hair in the corner of the screen as a microphone was thrust into view. "Mr. Agreste! Mr. Agreste, a few questions!" She didn't sound deterred by the police at all, even though several looked less than thrilled about her presence. "Mr. Agreste, you were found after Ms. Rossi spent several weeks following akumas back to your house. Why do you think, out of everyone in Paris-"

"Why did she decide to do that?" Mr. Agreste finished for the reporter. He had come to a stop, and none of the police looked thrilled. He shot one that was clearly trying to nudge him along a disgusted look. "That's easy enough. She told me why. She wanted revenge."

"Revenge?" Madam Chamack sounded confused. Lila was starting to feel a sinking feeling of dread in his gut. "Was she akumatized and wasn't happy about it?"

Mr. Agreste snorted. "Not happy about it? She was thrilled about it. She hates the superheroes and Ladybug in particular after some incident with them, and so she had been accepting akumas on purpose and even grabbing ones destined for others so that she could go after the superheroes. Apparently she was under the impression that doing so would grant her immunity against any akuma attacks."

There was a clear gasp from Madam Chamack. "She was getting akumatized on purpose?"

"She would volunteer for it. Then she got upset that she got targeted once and wanted revenge for that reason. It was hardly for a noble cause, and I don't doubt that she planned on taking out Ladybug and Chat Noir after defeating me." Mr. Agreste was jostled again, harder this time, and he glared at the policeman responsible before returning his attention to Madam Chamack. "If you don't believe me, I have proof. There'll be security camera footage- video and audio- from my lair on the home computer. The camera was there in case there were ever any intruders who came in while I wasn't there."

This was his revenge on her, Lila realized with a sick, sinking feeling. He was going down- there was no getting around that- but he was going to take her down with him. She wouldn't get cleared of the charges for stealing a Miraculous and needlessly endangering it, and at this rate...

She was going to get charged with purposefully colluding with a supervillain. If the police searched her notebooks- and they would now, who was she kidding?- they would see that she had been planning on taking out the superheroes, too.

Unless...unless they didn't listen to a supervillain. Unless they thought that he was just lying to slander her. But he had mentioned proof, and the likelihood of both reporters and police not following up on that was pretty slim.

"After that, while the police searched for the footage, we decided to approach some of Lila's classmates to see what they thought of the accusations," Madam Chamack continued. "Most of them were confused and not sure what to believe. Others, though, are positive that at least part of Lila's story are made up."

It didn't take a genius to figure out what was coming. Still, Lila couldn't hold in a hiss when she saw Marinette Dupain-Cheng's face appear on screen.

"Lila tells a lot of stories," she told Madam Chamack. "There was a video of her on the Ladyblog a while back with her claiming that she's Ladybug's best friend, even though she had just arrived in Paris. Anyone could have asked Ladybug about it and had that disproved in seconds."

"Ladybug told Lila to stop spreading lies about her right after that, and Lila didn't listen," another voice chimed in, and Lila scowled when the camera panned out to include Adrien Agreste. Why anyone would bother to interview him, she didn't know. Surely he wasn't considered a reliable source of information, with his father unmasked as Paris's supervillain. "That was the first time that she was akumatized as Volpina."

"She was akumatized again and made the illusions of the fighting Ladybug and Chat Noir on Heroes Day, even though she was claiming that she was in the middle of a trip out of the country," Marinette added. "She was gone from school for several months, claiming that she was on a trip and meeting all of these famous people. I don't know why no one besides us ever fact-checked her story. There were a ton of details that just didn't line up."

"Celebrities not even in the same country that she claimed they were, landscapes behind her with stores that closed years ago- it wasn't that hard to find the posters that she used as a backdrop to her Skype calls," Adrien told Madam Chamack. He wrapped his arm around Marinette's. "And no one ever checked up on that."

"And there were stories that she would tell in class, too- she claimed to have a hearing problem after saving Jagged Stone's kitten on an airplane runway, that's the one I remember most," Marinette finished. "Which is ridiculous. It's not hard to find video of Jagged Stone saying that he only likes reptiles and that he's had Fang for years. So I'd say that Lila is lying this time, too. Getting super-bent on revenge because of some perceived slight is totally up her alley. She's clearly trying to discredit Ladybug and Chat Noir and all of their hard work for the city."

"And she's certainly been akumatized far more often than anyone else in the city," Adrien added in. "Most of those times- the majority, I'd say- there wasn't even anything that had happened that we knew of to upset her."

"So even before we got our hands on the tape, there were some serious doubts about Lila Rossi's trustworthiness," Madam Chamack said as that clip ended. "Conversations with the teachers at her school confirmed that Lila had told those stories, and a source at the embassy confirmed that Ms. Rossi's mom was not traveling during the time that her daughter claimed. And then we received this clip."

Lila's heart was in her throat as a familiar scene showed up on-screen- Hawkmoth's lair. Glass shattered, and Sting appeared in front of Hawkmoth. They started their exchange, and every word she had said came over loud and clear.

No. No. All of her lies, all of her hard work, the careful web that she had spun- all of it was falling apart. Lila buried her hands in her hair, tugging as she tried to figure out some way- any way- out of this. She had to figure out something, anything, anything at all.

Nothing came to mind.

There was a knock on the door, and it opened to reveal several police officers. All of them had grim looks on their faces, and Lila knew without a doubt that they had already been informed of everything that Madam Chamack had just presented. The questioning that morning hadn't been because of her mom's lawsuit- which was definitely going to get thrown out, if it hadn't been already- it was because they were going to use her own words against her, pointing out where the evidence contradicted her words.

Lila gulped, unable to completely hide her nerves. She had never faced this level of scrutiny before, and had never told such large lies before, either. She hadn't ever done anything worse than threaten a couple people into silence before, and now- now she was facing multiple charges, each more serious than the last.

This time, Lila had to admit, she might have bitten off more than she could chew.

Fin.

[lokibug]

Blinded

Pairing: Loki x Blind!Reader

Summary: Beauty and the Beast AU in which Loki is forced to stay in his Jotun form until another human loves him. He becomes a caretaker for You due to be recently permanently blind.

Warnings: Angst, Cursing, Mention of Blood

Song: Heal by Tom Odell

A/N: Hey everyone sorry for the delay and the length of this one, but there’s more to come. Also for those in my ask box, I’m sorry but I can’t add more people in the tags. I’ve hit the limit as well as realizing the struggle of tagging people in the comments, but I’m still so honored for all of you in support of my story. Enjoy!

Part 1| Part 2| Part 3| Part 4| Part 5| Part 6| Part 7| Part 8| Part 9| Part 10

Sirens flared throughout the streets. It was as if everything were happening in slow motion. Stephanie pulling Y/N away from her father’s limp body. Loki making sure the medics lifted him properly. The God was not used to such a sight, he always seen humans as such weak specimens. Little did he know how strong they could be as well. For their flesh might’ve been weak, but their hearts far more intense than all else.

In order to save y/f/n’s life, the surgeons had to put him through surgery immediately. They worked as fast as they could in an attempt to save y/n’s father’s life. Y/N stood side by side with Loki and Stephanie. All with sorrowed faces. Despite all looking like complete messes, the doctors allowed them in a side waiting room so they wouldn’t disturb other worried patients. Y/N cling to Loki’s arm as her foot continuously and impatiently tapped on the carpeted floor. The wait allowed her to stop her sobbing and control herself somewhat. Stephanie rubbed y/n’s other hand in an attempt to comfort her. It worked for the moment.

Four hours later, a doctor came to the three of them. He asked to speak to y/n alone, despite her not truly being able to handle it...she went anyways. He broke the news that her father pulled through, but due to health conditions slipped into a coma. The tears appeared again and she felt as if she was going to scream. Instead she remained quiet minus a few sniffles. The doctor apologized and informed her of the process of which they were going to go through with her father’s recovery. After another half hour of explaining, Loki finally ushered her out of the hospital.

“Y/N?” Stephanie whispered, “Do you need me to stay with you tonight?” Y/N pondered over in her mind and rubbed her hands on her dress, still damped with spots of her father’s blood.

Raspy voiced, she responded, “Thank you Stephanie,” she sniffed, “But I think I’ll be okay...”

Stephanie gave her a tight hug and rubbed her palms on y/n’s back, “If you need anything at any time, I’ll be there.”

“Thank you...” she whispered before pulling away and grabbed onto Loki’s arm.

Y/N said nothing on the way home. She remained silent and leaned against the window of the car that took them home. Her heart was shattered and her beloved could only sit there and watch. He didn’t know how to hold her hand or display any type of love in the moment. Upon arriving to their home, y/n only held onto Loki until they made it completely inside. She wordlessly grabbed a robe for the shower. She showered for almost an hour scrubbing her skin till it burned. She never thought the smell would disappear. She was absolutely a nervous wreck. No tears fell as they did before, her mind only rewound on a continuous loop of the possible outcomes.

She grabbed the brush from the cabinet and ran it through her wet hair. Loki was near by, she had been inside the bathroom far too long and he was beginning to worry about her, well if had ever stopped worrying to begin with. The lights were dimmed and the main light source came from the moon. She stepped out of the bathroom and into the room. She had bumped into the doorway twice and groaned. She rubbed her arm and threw the dress on the bed. Y/N slowly stepped out the room and into the living room.

“Hey..” Loki said softly.

“Hey—“ suddenly y/n bumped her shin into the coffee table knocking over the coasters and she groaned. “—fucking shit! I can’t do t-this!” She began to sob as her body shook and she slowly sunk to the floor. Loki quickly went over to her. He wrapped his arms around her and gently carried her upon the couch. His cold fingers released her as he looked at her hands covering her face.

“Hey, Hey, Hey...” he whispered, “Y/N...please...talk to me...tell me what’s on your mind..” he encouraged her to voice her sorrow.

Catching her breath Y/N opened her eyelids, something she had never done before. The obvious pain and confusion laid in them and caused Loki’s heart to break. He knew not of the accident that caused this but he knew that she absolutely hated the thought of what her eyes must’ve looked like. “I can’t even walk to t-the living room without being scared sometimes Loki. I remember looking into my dad’s eyes and seeing only love. The only love I’ve ever known. Loki-I’ll never see him again because I’m fucking disabled and blind! I can’t do anything, what if I never feel him again?...what if he never scolds me again for making inappropriate jokes—o-or ask me about the movies no one else likes...” she laid her head down, “...I’m never going to see him again.” She his her face from him.

Loki quickly took his palms and placed them on her cheeks so she would face him. She could see his shadow from the moonlight. “Y/N,” his voice cracked, “Your father loves you, he loves you so much. He does not want you to worry for him, he’s going to be okay. I can’t promise, but y/n there’s hope. You taught that to me. There’s so much hope that we have...if you don’t have enough then I suppose I shall have enough for the both of us...” He pulled her into a tight hug as his eyes watered, “And you cry if you need to cry...don’t every deny yourself the privilege of your humanity. For you are the most beautiful and loving human I’ve ever met.” He stroked the back of her head as she buried her face in his shoulder as she quietly cried. Loki held onto her for as long as she was able to not fall asleep from exhaustion. The whole time she felt safe...warm, even in his cold aura. She didn’t understand what changed in him, why he was so nice to her. Perhaps Stephanie was right, maybe Loki was into her.

Little did she know this entire evening Loki felt lucky enough to hold the woman he felt he could love if he hadn’t already. Without his magic, it pained him to see that there was physically nothing he could do about the situation. What he did know, was that he had a pretty good idea as to who it could’ve been.

The two eventually made their way to bed, Loki gently lying her down and keeping her company until she was fully asleep. The next morning across town, the rather bad part of town, Lucas stood in an alley way in a hat and trench coat that shielded most of his identity. He held a suitcase full of money and waited until another hooded man appeared before him.

“You bring it all?...” The brown haired man spoke to him rubbing his gloved hands together.

Lucas nodded, “All of it here, the rest transferred.” He then handed over the briefcase into the hands that held a gun the previous evening.

“It better all be there, or we’ll make sure we get it.” He said inspecting the case. He snapped it closed once more as two other large men stood at the end of the alley way. Lucas eyed them and looked back at the man. “Are you threatening me?” He questioned.

“And what do you think you’re gonna do about it pretty boy?”

Lucas merely chuckled and wiped the corner of his mouth with his thumb, “You fellas have a good day.” With that he turned on his heels and walked in the opposite direction. With everything going just the way Lucas planned, he knew it was only a matter of time till he neared his goal and no one was getting in his way. He was going to deal with things his no matter who got in his way.

Since visiting hours started Y/N and Loki made their way down to the hospital. Loki still wore the surgical mask and hat. He left in the contacts and makeup from the previous night as Stephanie guided him on how to do so. Y/N managed to throw on whatever hoodie and jeans were lying around. She was eager to know her father’s condition. It was stable and improving, she was glad to hear this.

Loki stepped into the hospital room, seeing Y/N curled up on a chair next to the bed. She was caressing her dad’s limp hand and in deep thought. Hearing the quiet footsteps, she cleared her throat, “Who’s there?”

“It’s me love, I brought you back something from that room down stairs. They said they sold food and I just brought you back this...turkey,” he inspected the label, “sandwich and some of those chips you buy.” She sat up and smirked softly.

“Thank you, Loki. I was thinking I could read to him. I read somewhere that if you keep talking to coma patients that they could hear you. He loved when I could read to him, so I brought my brail book Stephanie got me. It’s in my bag, can you hand it to me?” She asked retrieving the items Loki had just brought her.

Loki rummaged through the black backpack next to the wall. He found a few things but no sign of the book.

“Hm, I can’t seem to find the book. I don’t think you put it in there.” He commented. Obvious disappointment was painted upon y/n’s face. Loki looked away from the bag to her face and rubbed his hands together. “I could go retrieve it for you. Carry it back, if you’d like.”

“You sure?...” She asked softly rubbing the plastic on the sandwich packaging.

“Of course,” he walked over to her and placed a soft kiss upon the of her head, “excuse me while I’m gone. If you need me for anything in the mean time, I’ll have the phone.”

“You mean the voice box?” She asked and chuckled softly. Loki shook his head, “A smart woman once told me it’s called a phone okay.” He turned on his heels and headed out the room once more.

After calling a taxi and getting a ride back to the apartment, he had a weird feeling. Almost an aura. He made his way up the stairs and to the door, pulling out his keys he put his hand around the door knob. Twisting it, he realized it was already unlocked. Stepping in her glanced around. The chair in the living room was occupied by none other than Lucas.

“What the hell are you doing here?” Loki asked composed. His demeanor never changing despite his emotions.

“Ah Loki. Loki Laufeyson?” He asked standing to his feet and stood near him, “or was it Odinson?”

Loki’s eyebrows immediately furrowed and he looked confused.

“Surprised? Did you really think you could hide forever? Helping out a poor blind girl, nice cover up really, almost had me fooled. How long do you think it will take for her to find out? I do see the way you look at her,” he circled around Loki slowly an evil smile present upon his chiseled cheeks, “like you two are going to have a happy ending. Pathetic.”

Loki’s jaw clenched as did his fists. He closed his eyes painfully holding back the urge to slam the blonde man into the wall. “What do you want?..” he growled.

“What do I want?...it’s quite simple really monster, I want you to hurt her. Break her heart,” he whispered in his ear, “crush her soul. Make her absolutely despise the sound of your voice.”

“Or?...” He questioned gazing equally as aggressive into Lucas’ eyes.

“Or, I tell her your little secret...making sure she knows of the monster you really are, and minimize the chances of that old fool ever rising from that coma...choose correctly Mr. Odinson.”

Fuming, Loki watched as Lucas as he chuckled and exited the apartment.

Loki taglist: @drakesfiance @sunflqweroses @bambamwolf87 @pandaqua @bonelessbarnes @dorkybryan @hunter-demigod-timelord @thatmemequeen @powerstrangerdacre @barnes-infinity-bucky

Story Taglist: @mrssangsterstylesxavier @awkward-silence-turtle @vxidnik @fandoms-allovertheplace @limedane21 @yourpotatotwiceremooved @crazyweirdgeekthatneedstochill @ajduurikscjsja @kiwigrease @fireismysaftey @nhievyenne @bambi-loki @bilesxbilinskixlahey @jessiejunebug @imarockstar45 @fuckthatfeeling @the-deity-ofthe-cosmos @chibiyanai @zarizha @mell-bell @blueskiesbleakeyes @always-kneel-to-loki @graveyardchild @some-person-somewhere @aljadams369 @marvelc00kie35 @harleykittykat @lokis-little-kitten @sparkling-liability @youveseen--thebutcher @wickedscorpio22 @zeddlocket @sheeraverage @trenchcoatdevilsworld @wishrains

Permanent Taglist: @marvelismylifffe @libbymouse @keithseabrook27 @maladaptive-ninja-returns

[nonbinarysasquatch]

I’m in Love

As I mentioned in my very first review, when I was a child I imagined myself in TV shows (or movies or musicals etc.) I’ve always had a very active imagination that I kept to myself for a long time (really until I was 30 and started writing fanfic.) It’s a big part of why I relate to Rebecca. It’s not the only reason but it’s certainly a big part.

What’s interesting about this finale is that it is as surprising as it is completely predictable. That Rebecca would realise she loves music isn’t surprising but that it wasn’t really about musical theater per se is surprising. I mean maybe it is still about musical theater but that’s not a future we are privy to. That can only exist in our imaginations.

That Rebecca doesn’t pick any of the guys is obviously not remotely surprising. It would’ve been surprising if she had. But the specific ways it went down were surprising and that they tipped their hats a little to Greg is surprising. But more on that later…

The final six words were a surprise but they are a surprise that makes perfect sense. We were all thinking “This is what happy feels like” but that’s too surface level. It’s telling not showing.

It’s not just that musical theater was a bit of a red herring but in a way music is too. The music only matters in as much it is who Rebecca is on the inside. The entire show has been about identity and it’s been staring us in the face the entire time. The show is called Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and from the beginning it’s been not only exploring that concept but has seen Rebecca endlessly trying on different identities, always struggling because she was never allowing herself to be herself.

When Paula tells Rebecca to just be herself back in episode 2.04, she reacts with revulsion. “Who would want to be that?” The identity she’s most comfortable with is the one she’s kept hidden. It never occurred to her to actually bring that out until Paula finally asks her why she stares off sometimes. Presumably all of her friends have noticed this from time to time (we can assume Rebecca has imagined far, far more songs that we as viewers have ever seen) and none of them have stopped to ask what was up. Maybe they just accepted it as a Rebecca quirk.

Where does Rebecca go next? I can envision countless futures for her. I like the idea that maybe she writes enough songs to go on a bit of a tour. It’s kind of a mess but she has Heather and Valencia with her (Paula is busy) to keep her company.

Maybe she takes things further. Maybe she tries to write a musical. Maybe she moves back to New York. I’m sure I’ll write fanfic someday but for now I really don’t know where I see her going.

The other characters…

Paula: Paula took a stand and it was great. She’s come so far. I was a bit nervous they might force her to quit her job but I’m glad it didn’t go that way.

Heather/Hector: Hot tub. They got the best ending if I’m being honest.

Valencia: Valencia proposed in a very Valencia way. I sort of question why they ever had her move to New York since narratively it ultimately didn’t matter. I think there are a lot of missed opportunities with Valencia but those aren’t really the fault of this episode in particular.

Josh: I’m so glad the magic thread got picked up again. I was really excited when it got brought up again in 4.08. For the record: I hated the idea of him becoming a model and I’m disappointed the fandom was repeating that over and over as if it was somehow the only piece of information anyone retained about Josh (he’s hot!) But the show gave him a good ending. Incidentally, Josh was the only one of the three guys who made an effort to date people other than Rebecca this season.

Nathaniel: Nathaniel got as good an ending as one could want. He quits the law firm and moves to friggin Guatemala to be a lawyer for an animal sanctuary (it’s not a zoo. Theoretically, sanctuaries can be more ethical… or they can be worse.) I was surprised that he both 1. Seemed to most assume he was going to win but 2. Actually handled the rejection the best.

Greg: Honestly, Greg’s ending came a few episodes back with the Serrano’s soft open. While Rebecca didn’t end up with anyone they did clearly tip their hats a little to Greg. He got the full explanation of what happened. He also told Rebecca he wouldn’t wait for her but a year later he was still single. I still kinda feel bad for Greg. After 3 years he can’t get over her. Or maybe he has? It’s hard to say. My thoughts on Greg since he’s been brought back are complicated and I’m sure I’ll make a separate post going over that. I think Skylar did a good job and the writing was generally good. Do I think it worked? Not fully. Do I think it served the purpose Rachel and Aline wanted? Probably.

WhiJo: WHAT ON EARTH. Who knew WhiJo would get the dark ending? I mean I guess it could be darker but he’s the only character that kind of suffers a minor tragedy. Perhaps this is his karmic price for the role he played as an agent of chaos at the end. In a funny sort of way, WhiJo was the final villain. On the other hand, things with Greg, Josh and Nathaniel were about to spin out of control anyway. Perhaps he just gave that chaos a more manageable form. Either way, not the role I would’ve ever expected for him back in season one.

Darryl: Darryl’s ending is cute. I think it’s interesting how little drama there was in the couples who work out. April and Beth are mostly blank slates. Neither of them define their partners. Darryl Whitefeather is probably the best handled bisexual character I’ve ever seen. They managed to avoid all of the bad tropes for the most part. And it’s surprisingly rare to see a male bi character have relationships with men and women over the course of a show. Traditionally bi male characters just end up with dudes and end up being bi in name only. Or they just flirt a lot or had sex with women in the past. But Darryl was handled pretty naturally. I don’t think all of the show’s handling of queer characters was perfect (though given the crap that’s out there, eh, I’ll take it) but Darryl was solid.

Jason: He was sure in this episode. Actually, I’m gonna derail my Jason comment to talk about the fact that Jim was in the final lineup. I think in Jim’s mind he and Rebecca really have had a ton of tension for years. Who knows maybe they date for a while. I kind of hope Rebecca does a lot of dating.

AJ: AJ was one of the best things about this season. He wasn’t a super engrossing character or anything but Clark was always a delight. I’m sad we didn’t get to see more of their roommate banter because I bet it was amusing. Also: Rebecca pays AJ and he pays her back in rent? I mean, I guess but there’s something funny about that. She can’t legally take it out of his wages, to be fair.

The Songs:

Eleven O’Clock: Does what it needed to. It’s a good selection of songs. For once, most of my thoughts on it are tied into my thoughts on the episode.

West Covina (Final Reprise): THE FEELS.

And that’s that. It’s both a very different and very simple finale. In a good series finale, you’ve already done the work so that when you get to the finale it’s the only place left to go. I think they mostly pulled that off. When evaluating the show in retrospect there will be a lot of ways to do it. It was more successful at some things than others. This is far from the last things I will have to say about this show.

Just remember: Romantic love is not an ending.

[worryinglyinnocent]

Fic: A Streak of Luck (9/10)

Summary: Lady Belle of the Marchlands sets out to break the curse that has doomed all the women of her family line for centuries, seeking out the legendary sorcerer Rumpelstiltskin to aid her in her quest. Even if she finds him, will he be able to help her break her curse?

Rated: T

[One] [Two] [Three] [Four] [Five] [Six] [Seven] [Eight] [AO3]

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CW for this chapter: suicide mention

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Nine

Objectively, Rumpelstiltskin knew that he ought to be doing something a bit more productive than just pacing up and down his workroom feeling sorry for himself. The final week of his four-month agreement with Belle was upon him, and he was still no nearer to finding the cause for or cure to her curse.

Well, that wasn’t strictly true. They had found out a lot more than they knew when they had first started the venture. They’d found out which Dark One had created the curse, and they had found the identity of the person who had cast it and how they fitted in with Belle’s family tree. Evangeline of Avonlea’s daughter, Elizabeth, had married into the Marchlands noble line three years before the curse was cast, and had died a year after giving birth to her only child.

Further investigation into Belle’s heritage documents revealed a more sinister truth - Elizabeth, deeply depressed, had ended her own life. It was looking ever more likely that the curse had been cast on the Marchlands line had been cast as a form of revenge by Evangeline on the family that had caused her daughter so much unbearable pain.

The marriage between Elizabeth of Avonlea and Horace of the Marchlands had been arranged by their fathers for the benefit of both lands, and during the long nights of their research together, Belle had thought up all kinds of theories as to how the curse had come to be cast. She had entertained Rumpel with them for hours, but sadly, none of what they had found and none of what they had speculated had given them any clues as to how the curse could be broken. It seemed that Evangeline’s ire was such that the curse would never break; she had been determined that the Marchlands noble line would suffer until it was snuffed out. Perhaps she had not bargained on it having such a strong male line.

“Why curse the women?” Belle had asked the previous evening. “If Elizabeth had made an unhappy marriage, surely it would make more sense for her to have cursed the male line.”

“Not necessarily,” Rumpel said. “She had lost her daughter, after all. If she wanted to inflict the maximum pain with her curse, then she would want them to feel the same pain she had - the loss of their own daughters. Also, what with male inheritance of titles and all other such outdated notions that I’ve never understood the ruling classes’ obsession with, the noble line will continue as long as there are male heirs. If she’d cursed the male line to have short lives and terrible luck then the title and legacy would have died out much sooner.”

Belle conceded the point. “I guess that’s true. I just wish that we knew how to appease Evangeline so many centuries after her own death. It’s a long grudge to bear, and I’m sure that the Avonlea noble family knows nothing of this. They certainly bear us no ill will now, and even in the wake of these revelations, I bear them no ill will. The sins of the father and all that. Well, the mother in this case.”

They had continued to puzzle out Evangeline’s motivations for a while longer, but ultimately, they were still no closer to working out how to break the curse, and Rumpelstiltskin could tell that it was having an effect on Belle. For the last couple of days, she had been unhappy, far from her usual bright and enthusiastic self. He had often caught her staring out of the Dark Castle’s windows with a far-off, wistful look in her eyes, and it was with a heavy heart that Rumpelstiltskin realised the reason for her abstraction.

Soon she would have to leave the castle, and she would be leaving without the cure that she had sought. Despite all his assurances that four months would be enough time in which to break the curse, he had failed her.

Truth be told, Rumpelstiltskin himself was not looking forward to the moment of Belle’s departure, and he had been wondering about various ways in which he could extend her stay. Since he had not found her cure, it would make sense for her to stay on in the castle until one could be procured.

He shook his head, stopping his pacing up and down the workroom and throwing himself down into his chair. Over the course of the last couple of hundred years, he had become quite accustomed to brooding alone, thinking of his seemingly endless life stretching out in front of him with no-one to share it with.

It would be selfish of him to ask Belle to stay on. When they had gone to meet Will, she had been firm in her assertion that she would be back in the Marchlands at the end of her four-month stay away, no matter what happened. It was clear how much she missed her friend, and he couldn’t ask her to keep chasing the dream of a cure that might never happen. If he had not managed to find one by now, then the chance of him finding one in the future was looking ever smaller.

There was the small matter of her curse not seeming to affect her as badly whilst she was in the Dark Castle. Over the last few weeks since they had received the documents from Will, her little mishaps had dwindled to nearly nothing, and if it weren’t for the white streak in her hair that still hummed with magic, calling out to him whenever he came near, he would have begun to believe that there was no curse at all. Surely she would want to stay somewhere that kept her symptoms at bay, even if they had never been able to establish a reason for this.

No, that was just a dream of his. She needed to go home. She wanted to go home.

Perhaps… Maybe he could visit her once she went home to the Marchlands? He had not ventured out from his castle on a regular basis for many years, only when he heard a truly desperate soul in need, just as he had heard Belle and gone to investigate her. It was even longer since he had left the safe borders of the Frontlands. He did not like to stray too far away from where he had lived with Bae; he liked to be surrounded by the memories of his son’s happy life to remind him that he made the right choice to take on the curse of the Dark One and let Bae lead a normal life.

All the same, a little trip to see Belle wouldn’t cause too much harm. He would of course continue his research in her absence, and if he could turn up one day and present her with the cure she had so long sought, then hopefully their friendship would be maintained.

Rumpelstiltskin pushed all his hopes of their friendship ever becoming anything more to the back of his mind. That really wasn’t something that he ought to be dwelling on in the current circumstances.

A knock on the door to the workroom pulled him out of his miserable spiral of thought, and he straightened in his chair, trying not to look as if he had just been moping. With so little time left before their inevitable parting, he really ought to be spending as much time as possible being productive.

Belle peered around the door, and on seeing that Rumpel was not caught up in something terribly important or delicate, she came in fully. There was nervousness in her manner; when she spoke, it was with a brightness that masked a trembling.

“There you are! I’ve been looking for you all over the castle. I’m starting to think that you’ve been avoiding me.”

Well, that was true in a way. He had been steering well clear of her in an attempt to break his infatuation, but the moment he saw her again, he knew it hadn’t worked.

“Well, you’ve certainly found me,” he said. “What can I do for you, Belle?”

“I was wondering… As you know, I only have a few days left at the castle before our deal is up.”

Rumpel nodded. “Yes. I know you must be eager to get back to your home, and I’m sorry that I have been unable to provide you with the cure you need in the time. Although I promised to hang up my hat as a practitioner of magic should I be unable to break the curse, if you’ll permit, I would like to keep working on it after you leave. No curse is unbreakable, no matter how much thought my predecessor put into it.”

“Oh. Yes. No. It’s not that. Well, it is. I would be very happy for you to keep working on my case. In fact, that was what I was going to ask. Well, part of it. What I was going to ask was if we could renegotiate?”

“Renegotiate?” Rumpel’s heart beat hard in his chest. Could she really be asking what he thought that she was asking?

“Yes. I was hoping that we would be able to extend the deal. I mean, my curse is so much happier here than it is at home, and whilst I do miss Will and my other family back in the Marchlands, it’s not as if I’m cut off from them forever.”

Rumpel didn’t say anything for a long time, scarcely able to believe what he was hearing.

“Rumpel?” Belle tilted her head on one side, searching his face for some kind of reaction to her request. “If you don’t like the idea then I could go, but I would have thought that having me here would be much easier for your research.”

Rumpel nodded slowly. “Yes. No. I mean yes, it would certainly make things easier if you were to remain. Are you sure that’s what you want?”

Belle nodded. “Yes, I’m certain.” There was a long pause and she turned away, moving to gaze out of the window. “I like it here,” she said. “I like being here with you. It’s not just the curse being more manageable, although I can’t deny that makes the world of difference to my life. But when I’m here with you, I’m able to forget that I was even cursed in the first place.”

“I like you being here,” Rumpel admitted. He moved across to stand beside her. It felt important to take that step, to assure her that they were on the same page, at least, he thought they were. “With you here I’ve been able to forget how lonely I’ve been for these past hundred years. You’ve reminded me that there are things out there – and people – that make life worth living. To tell you the truth, Belle, I had been considering offering to extend your stay here myself.”

Belle looked at him curiously. “Why didn’t you?”

“I didn’t want to take you away from your family and your friends, your chance at a happy life. It would be selfish for me to keep you here when there’s so much out there.”

“It’s not selfish if I want to be here too.” The little smile creeping over Belle’s face was luminous, and when she placed her hands gently on Rumpel’s shoulders, it felt like the most natural thing in the world. He had gone so long without the simple comfort of the human touch that Belle’s tactile nature had been alarming at first, but now he welcomed it.

“Rumpel, I…”

Whatever she was going to say, it was lost in the moment, and if she said anything, Rumpel didn’t hear it. As he gazed into her bright blue eyes, all he could think about was the fact that, slowly and surely, he had fallen head over heels in love with this remarkable woman, and there was no use in trying to deny the fact anymore. He knew that it could only end in tears. They were both cursed, for a start, her to a short life and him to an unending one. He was so much older than her and he had seen so much tragedy in his long life. She couldn’t possibly feel the same way.

But there again, her hands were on his shoulders, and those brilliant blue eyes were searching his, and her plump bottom lip was worrying between her teeth.

And all curses could be broken. Both Belle’s and his had a cure somewhere.

Something in the back of his mind started clanging pots and pans together, determined to have its sudden realisation heard. Rumpel knew that he’d just remembered something incredibly important, but whatever it was flew clean out of his mind as Belle went up on her tiptoes and pressed her lips against his.

It was a nervous kiss, born from a moment of bravery, throwing the rulebook out of the window and just going for it, uncaring for whatever the consequences might be. Rumpelstiltskin slipped his arms around Belle’s back, returning the kiss wholeheartedly. Even if everything ended up going very wrong after this moment, then the four months were almost over, and they never needed to see each other again after that.

As Belle’s mouth opened and her eager tongue darted out over his lips, however, Rumpel didn’t think that it would come to that. His entire body felt like it was tingling all over, and he closed his eyes and just gave into the sensation. It had been so long since he’d felt anything like this, back long before he had been cursed. Even so, there was something about kissing Belle that was indescribable. It was as if it was meant to be, as if everything in his life had ultimately been leading him to this moment. This was why he had never found a way to end the Dark Curse after Bae’s passing. He had been meant to survive this long and he had been meant to meet Belle.

Finally, they broke apart, and as Rumpel opened his eyes, he startled at the sight in front of him. Similarly, Belle jumped back half a step, her eyes widening.

“Belle, your hair…” Rumpel began, but Belle interrupted.

“Your skin!” she exclaimed.

Rumpel looked down at the back of his hand, giving an unseemly squawk of surprise when he saw the blush of pink, human skin spreading over the mottled grey scales; dark claw-like fingernails shortening and becoming normal once more.

He whirled around, grabbing the cover off the looking glass that stood in the corner of the room. He had always kept the mirrors in the place covered; they were easily used by spies. This time, though, he needed to see what was happening with his own two eyes. Belle came to stand beside him as he watched his mesmerised reflection return to the human complexion that he had not seen for centuries. Her own hands came to her mouth as she saw her own image.

Belle’s hair was completely white, the same snowy colour that had marked her maudlin streak now covered her crown, the last strands of brown just fading out at the tips.

“I think you broke my curse,” she whispered. “Should a lady survive till her crown is as white as her streak, the curse will be lifted, and the lineage restored. That’s what the curse says. And you…”

Rumpel nodded. “I think you broke my curse too.”

“So, that’s the end of the Dark One, as well as my curse?” Belle hedged. “Have we really broken two curses with one kiss? A kiss was all it took?”

“Yes.” The thought that had occurred to Rumpel just as the point they had kissed suddenly came back to him in a rush of jubilation. “Yes! Oh, how stupid of me, why didn’t I think of it before? True Love’s Kiss can break any curse!”

“True Love’s Kiss.” Belle ran her fingers over her lips. “Yes, I think that must be it. Although…”

Rumpel’s heart was beating painfully in his mouth as he turned to her. Was she having second thoughts? Surely the kiss would not have worked and would not have broken both of their curses if the feeling wasn’t true and mutual. “Yes?”

“I think we ought to do it again. Just to be absolutely sure that the curses are gone.”

Rumpel let out a huff of relieved laughter, welcoming her into his arms and pressing his lips against hers readily once more. After all the months of research, this was what it had come down to, a simple kiss. Not that there was anything simple about true love, of course; it was the most powerful magic there had ever been.

He tangled his fingers into Belle’s silky hair, no longer feeling any kind of magical pulse to it. There again, his own magic was dissipating now, the powers that the curse had given him vanishing away back into the ether. There was still something there, alive at the back of his mind. One couldn’t live around magic for so long without it rubbing off a little, but the darkness, the insidious voice in his head that had been his constant companion for so long, was well and truly gone.

Belle broke the kiss with a happy sigh, nudging her forehead against his.

“I love you, Rumpelstiltskin.”

“And I love you, Belle.”

[spooky-ghostwriter]

Dressed to Kill - Chapter Twenty-One

<– Previous Chapter

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Tsukiko dreamt.

She stood on the same dirt path, but she would have hardly believed it was the same forest of her previous dreams. No longer did the sunlight trickle down through the forest's canopy and give the foliage an unearthly glimmer. The world around her seemed grey and dull. The trees and grass, once so full of life, felt empty.

There was no wind blowing. No skittering of possible animals or chirping of birds. The silence was as disturbing to Tsukiko as the lack of light.

As she walked along the path, she took the time to search the forest. She wasn't sure what she was looking for; Tsukiko had never been able to find whatever had created the noises in her previous visits. Still, she overturned rocks and ruffled through bushes and shrubs, hoping to find anything.

No matter how often or where Tsukiko stopped to look, she found nothing.

Finally, the dirt path ended. She stood at the crossroads. The paved street that marked the entrance to the right-hand path, and the huge skyscrapers that marked the city looked just as they always had. However, this time, they were not just on Tsukiko's right. The city extended beyond, standing behind both ends of the dirt path. The forest, full of its dangers and mysteries, no longer existed.

Tsukiko crossed her arms and sat firmly on the edge of the dirt path.

“No,” she said simply.

There was no answer, not that she expected one from a city.

“You hear me?!” Tsukiko demanded from the nothingness. “I made my choice! You can't take it away from me now!”

On previous nights, it was the walk down the dirt path that felt eternal. Now, the timeless step was how long Tsukiko waited on the end of the path. After what could have been months of sitting with her eyes closed, she heard a noise.

A distant male voice was yelling something. It was so far away that Tsukiko couldn't make out the words. She refocused on the voice.

“Must be fifty trucks...”

“Who? Who's here?!” A second voice demanded.

“A... a circus!”

Tsukiko's eyes shot open – now she was fully awake.

A black truck screeched to a halt in Cypress Laboratory's parking lot. Vercingetorix stepped out of the driver seat. He cracked his knuckles. Stiletto emerged from the passenger seat, already holding daggers between her knuckles. Ravindra and Henry appeared from the back doors. Ravindra took a drink of something in a flask; Henry seemed to be playing with a yo-yo that no one could see.

A large trailer pulled in beside them. Much more colourful than Vercingetorix's truck, it brightly advertised wild animals. Pierre and Galen stepped out in sync and opened the ghost lions' cage. The lions roared, their ferocity aimed at the building before them.

A smaller, even brighter, buggy followed. Miss Isle was driving, but she was hardly the only occupant. Galen took his eyes away from the lab to watch their display. A man swung his already-stilted legs out of one side and stood over ten feet tall. A clown juggling sabers followed. Two more clown women hopped out from somewhere, pulled supplies out of the trunk and began hastily setting up a trapeze.

One after another, more vehicles and circusfolk appeared, until at last, the entirety of the Alesia Circus stood on the facility grounds.

Miss Isle tossed a megaphone to Vercingetorix.

“Attention, people of the Cypress Research Facility!” He cried, his voice booming through the city square. “Researchers, scientists, and all other human staff – please evacuate the area immediately. We have no quarrel with you.

“Garrick!” Vercingetorix said. The harshness in his voice was amplified tenfold by the megaphone. “We are prepared to destroy every single one of your dryads. But. If you release Tsukiko, we are willing to discuss terms of peace.”

Galen looked at Vercingetorix. Both of them knew that the chance of peace was infinitesimally small. Vercingetorix's death grip on the megaphone's handle told Galen that Vercingetorix was himself hoping that Garrick would choose the hard way.

A few moments later, the doors to the facility opened. A group of people emerged. Stiletto prepared herself to fill the targets with knives, but it quickly became clear that these were ordinary humans – men and women with their hands raised, watching the circus with incredulity.

When the crowd thinned, Vercingetorix found one of the last people to leave and grabbed Mr. Richards by the shoulder.

“Were you the last to leave?” He asked.

“Yes,” said the man. “Only Garrick and... I guess Specimen Delta must be that Tsukiko you mentioned.”

“Specimen...” Vercingetorix repeated through grit teeth. He noticed his grip on the man's shoulder tightening as well and released him.

“Get everyone as far away from here as you can,” Vercingetorix said. “Now.”

As dozens of vehicles drove away carrying the evacuees, the facility doors opened again, and one final human stepped outside. For a moment, Galen hoped it would be Tsukiko, but instead, he saw the cactus farmer, Atticus Lee Pereskia.

“What the hell...?” Galen asked.

Atticus walked up to Vercingetorix and tipped his straw hat.

“You're a dryad after all, I see,” said Vercingetorix.

“Why yes, in fact,” The farmer drawled. “This here dryad is what I call a mouthpiece. I wasn't quite able to figure out how to get rid of this doggone accent, but overall I'm satisfied with the results.”

“So that's Garrick speaking?” Stiletto asked.

“That's right, little lady.”

“If you're here to discuss terms, release Tsukiko first,” said Vercingetorix.

“I'm afraid I can't do that just yet,” said Atticus. “There hasn't been a scrap of useful data from any of her tests.”

“Look,” Vercingetorix muttered. “We can tell you as much as we know about Tsukiko's abilities. But we need you to release her first.”

“No no no no no,” Atticus said, shaking his head for each 'no'. “Your explanations can't be trusted. Y'all are used to deceiving an audience, and I'm sure your explanations of Specimen Delta's abilities are just the same. You see, Specimen Alpha, all y'all are liars. You show people smoke and mirrors and tell them the impossible just happened. I'm the one who takes the impossible and truly makes it real. Y'all seem to have fluked your way into recruiting someone truly magical, and I'll be damned if I let that chance get away.”

Galen spent a moment wondering how Garrick's folders of research explained the ghost lion whose leashes were held in Pierre's hands. On the other hand, he imagined Tsukiko must be proud to be even more magical than the ghost lions by this strange plant-man's standards.

On the other other hand, he felt a simmering anger at Garrick refusing to release Tsukiko.

A blast of fire flew from the other side of Vercingetorix's truck. It caught Atticus, setting the farmer ablaze. He burned as quickly as a scarecrow would have; the fire completely immersing the dryad from the inside out. Being only a mouthpiece, Atticus eerily made no noise as it burned, even as the last few cinders disappeared into the air.

“Ravindra!” Vercingetorix cried.

“Yes?” said the firebreather.

“I was going to kill him,” Vercingetorix said, almost pouting.

“My apologies,” Ravindra said with a laugh. “But I believe we'll all have ample opportunity to kill dryads.”

“Yes,” Vercingetorix agreed, a hand on the seed in his chest. “I think you're right.”

The grass between the parking lot and the facility began to rustle. A patch rose up, then pulled away like a curtain; behind it stood a humanoid mass of vines and pumpkins, nearly identical to the one Tsukiko and Galen fought so long ago. Another flap of grass transported a snapdragon onto the battlefield. Then a smaller version of the apple tree monster, then a woman-like mass of ivy. They were soon joined by cactus foot-soldiers and plant monstrosities that Galen had never seen, but the other members of the circus seemed to recognize.

The battle began. Three human-shaped cacti emerged from the horde. These seemed intent on Vercingetorix – they rushed towards him, and their needles seemed to grow into spear-like weapons moreso than mere spikes.

“Only three this time?” Galen asked. He slammed the pinky sides of his hands together. The Boxer Shorts responded, even beneath the Cargo Pants. The metal wires shot out from the edge of his shirt and clamped on his hands, forming gloves of steel.

Two of the cactus dryads threw punches. Galen's fists reacted automatically. He crashed the back of his left hand into the downward strike of one dryad. His right fist collided dead-on with the other dryad's fist.

This would have been all it took to destroy the last cacti he fought, but these two simply pulled back and prepared for another attack.

“Henry!” Galen cried. “These ones are way tougher than the last ones. Watch out!”

Galen was unsure of whether the mime actually heeded his warning. He looked over at Henry and Vercingetorix; Henry was holding his hands flat against some sort of non-existent barrier. The third cactus soldier bashed its fists against it over and over again. Clearly, just like the previous cactus soldiers, this dryad did not realize why punching was failing, and could not come up with a better solution.

Henry lifted one of his hands from formation, the only gesture keeping him and Vercingetorix alive, and used it to cover his mouth while he yawned.

I should have taken up miming, Galen realized.

“Galen! Duck!” Stiletto's distant voice roared.

Galen obliged. He lowered his head just in time to watch a battleaxe spin through the air and decapitate one of the cacti.

I should have taken up axe throwing too, Galen decided.

He put those thoughts aside and went back to what his present situation and skillset allowed him to do – punching. He wound back a fist and thrust it against the remaining dryad's head. It moved to block with one of its arms, but Galen's punch pierced through and crashed into the dryad nonetheless. What would have been the plant's face splattered into liquid, and it fell to the ground dead.

“Galen, take one of ze lions,” Pierre said. He approached the group with both ghost lions in tow on their enchanted chain leashes. “Heir will take you to ze top floor. Begin searching for ze girl there. Once we break through, we shall search from ze bottom up.”

“Are you sure?” Galen asked, looking up at the building. It was seven storeys tall. “I was thinking of trying out the Jumper.”

“No, no, focus on the Boxer Shorts,” Vercingetorix said, in a much calmer tone of voice than the flailing fists of the third cactus dryad a few inches from his face should have allowed. “The Jumper can be dangerous if you're not used to it. Take one of the lions.”

“Okay,” said Galen hesitantly. He undid the Boxer Shorts' metallic gloves and took hold of Heir the lion's chain. “Now what?”

The lion took a step upwards. It walked through the air like a ramp.

“They can walk on air?!” Galen demanded. He held on to the chain for dear life as the lion's climb began to lift him as well.

“Of course zey can!” Pierre cried. “Zey are ghosts. Ghosts are not affected by gravity!” His yells became more and more distant as the lion carried Galen into the air, but Galen was sure that Pierre's ranting continued far past the point he was out of earshot.

“All right, Heir,” Galen said to the lion. They reached the fourth floor; Galen's hands ached, but he gripped the chain tighter. “Let's get to the roof.”

The lion made a growling noise. Galen hoped that meant it agreed with his plan.

They reached the fifth storey. Heir stopped its ascent. It turned so that it faced the wall head-on.

“Uh, buddy?” Galen asked, dangling. “Two more floors to go.”

Heir ignored him and moved forward. Its head disappeared into the wall, the rest of its body slowly following.

“Heir! Hey! No!” Galen cried, as the chain leash began to lose its grip on the beast, unable to pass through the wall as Heir had. “Okay okay.”

He tapped the sides of his hands together. The Boxer Shorts' gauntlets snapped onto his hands. He let go of the chain with his right hand, letting the metal coils lock the chain to his left. Then, before the chain disappeared, he punched the wall with all the force he could muster.

With a resounding crash, Galen had a passageway into the building. Heir gave him a look of confusion, as if wondering why he hadn't simply phased through the wall like Heir himself. Galen returned the lion a look of annoyance.

Still, whatever methods they'd chosen, both of them were inside. They stood in a hallway, one so white and clean to the point of sterility that Galen almost felt bad for obliterating one of its walls.

“I don't suppose you can sniff out Tsukiko, can you?” Galen asked the lion.

Heir yawned, then sat down in the sunbeam created by Galen's hole in the wall. It stretched out its ethereal limbs.

“I'd almost forgotten you were a cat.”

Five storeys below, the battle raged on.

“Come, everyone!” said Pierre. He led the larger ghost lion Reign as well as a large portion of the circus' stagehands and clowns, as the other members of the circus tackled the initial wave of dryads. “Be careful,” Pierre said. “Remember that zese dryads can pop out of ze grass at any time.”

Pierre took a tentative step on the grass. Nothing happened.

“Well zen, I guess zey are out of dryads,” He said.

They were halfway across the lawn before Pierre was proven wrong. Dozens of meters' worth of grass blades fluttered up around the squadron. Pierre and Reign watched in shock as vast green pillars rose from the ground around them, towering high above their heads.

“What is zis...?” Pierre asked.

Thousands of thick plant stems stood around them, barricading them within a labyrinth. Pierre pushed against the wall in front of him, but the plants stood sturdy.

“Reign, go through.”

The ghost lion hesitantly pressed a paw against the wall. Even it, the incorporeal lion, could not pass through the wall. The beast leapt up and began running up the air, but the plants stretched to form a ceiling cage.

“Zis is insane...” Pierre muttered to himself.

In one instant, Pierre, Reign, and nearly half of Alesia's forces had been trapped by a massive corn maze.

Stiletto and Miss Isle circled the apple tree monster, blades and bombs at the ready. The thing was relatively small, only about eight feet tall and ten long. Stiletto spied one pulsing heart buried beneath a mass of branch-like ribs.

“Do you think you can blast those ribs apart?” Stiletto asked.

Miss Isle idly juggled a hand grenade as she thought. Stiletto took a moment to confirm it still had the pin inside it before allowing her to continue.

“That shouldn't be a problem,” Miss Isle replied. “But the tree with three hearts had really durable hearts, remember? Can you kill this one?”

“We'll find that out when you blast through the ribs.”

“Fair enough,” Miss Isle shrugged, yanking out the pin from her grenade.

“Torch, please!” Ravindra bellowed. A stagehand ignited one and passed it to him while he swished a mouthful of some flammable concoction.

His opponent was a lumbering ape-like creature, a mass of vines and leaves lined with bright red peppers.

Ravindra released a fireball. Flame swirled around the dryad, engulfing it in a burning vortex. Ravindra spat every drop of liquid through the torch, letting nothing go to waste.

To his shock, the dryad remained standing. It was not undamaged; parts of its greenery were charred black, but it felt inconceivable that the behemoth was anything more than cinders.

“I don't think I'll be able to defeat this thing,” Ravindra said to his small band of stagehands. “See if Vercingetorix can find someone else – I may be able to help with the corn maze or apple tree instead.”

“Roger!” said one of the torch-holders. He ran off to Vercingetorix's position.

The hot pepper dryad took notice. It flexed its nonexistent muscles and the peppers on its body constricted. A second later, seeds burst through the pods like bullets. Ravindra felt a seed fly smack against his teeth and enter his mouth.

He coughed. The seed burned with an unimaginable heat – or at least, one that Ravindra had only ever felt from his fire-eating acts. The peppers and the seeds they fired were nothing like peppers known to humanity.

The crewmembers behind him had taken equivalent attacks. Not used to such heat, they clutched their throats and screamed in pain.

Is that why it was able to survive my fire? Ravindra asked himself. Perhaps it needs to be heat-resistant to tolerate the spice of its own seeds. I'm not completely sure that's how spiciness works, but I'll be sure to look that up when we're done here.

Besides Ravindra, all of the men and women facing the hot pepper dryad fell to the ground. Ravindra ran to the closest.

He's only passed out, He thought with relief. I'm glad those seeds weren't poisonous, but still...

Ravindra chewed the seed that the dryad had shot into his mouth. Indeed, he could understand how a normal human would be affected by this level of spiciness.

He picked the fallen torches up off the ground, and lit them with his own.

“I see that I need to be the one to kill you,” Ravindra said to the dryad, even though he doubted it could understand him. “I can't let you incapacitate anyone else.”

Ravindra took a swig of the mysterious fluid he kept in his flask.

A battle of heat. I accept your challenge.

“Pardon me, Henry,” said Vercingetorix, as the final remaining cactus dryad continued to uselessly batter the mime's invisible wall. “Could we actually kill this dryad and move on?”

Henry waited for a second between punches and gave Vercingetorix a quick shrug.

Vercingetorix spied the battleaxe Stiletto had previously thrown, lying on the pavement just a few feet away.

“Allow me.”

Vercingetorix leapt out of the safety of Henry's invisible barrier. The cactus, spying Vercingetorix as the main target, turned and lumbered forward to intercept him. Vercingetorix swung the axe as he picked it up, lobbing off one of the cactus' arms. The dryad made a full-bodied gesture as though it would be howling in rage and pain if it had a mouth. It swung its remaining arm, but Henry jumped between the two of them. The cactus' attack stopped an inch before Henry's new gesture; a mimed wall protecting Vercingetorix and Henry once more.

Vercingetorix adjusted his grip on Stiletto's battleaxe and prepared for another swing.

Before he could, the cactus dryad's needles shifted. Spikes shot out of what would be its wrist and skewered Henry's shoes. The mime winced as the needles pierced his feet.

That wince, the one flinching of Henry's fingers, was enough to remove the effects of the mime barrier. Whatever mind the cactus had that had believed in the wall no longer did, and its next punch was unimpeded. Vercingetorix saw the needles come over closer. At the last moment, he felt a hard shove; Henry forced him out of the way of the cactus' attack.

The cactus bashed Henry directly with its spiked limb. The needles extended as they struck the mime's body, and for an instant, Vercingetorix could see their very tips emerge from the back of Henry's clothes.

Vercingetorix screamed wordlessly as he swung the battleaxe. He cleaved the dryad in half vertically. The two pieces fell apart. Vercingetorix couldn't afford to spend any time confirming whether this was enough to kill the dryad.

He tossed the battleaxe aside, catching Henry with both arms. The battle continued around them; Vercingetorix heard explosions, flame, ghost lion roars and weapons flying, but gave none of those sounds any attention.

His mind was frozen, focused so intently on Henry that nothing else around him mattered. It was all the same as before. The blood. The ragged breathing. The weight of a human in his arms. The sad disgraceful state of a person who Vercingetorix had previously thought to be infallible.

It was all the same as when he had lost Freya.

[foeseekerwriter]

Let’s Shred Voltron

Here’s a rather rambling, non-comprehensive breakdown of the ways VLD has royally screwed over its entire cast. Because I’m fed up and needed to get some of this off my chest so I could move on with other projects.

Allura is now a Workaholic Married to the Job. This girl is being made to do everything—be the team’s main diplomat and the leader of the Voltron Coalition (whose alleged size and scope makes the UN look like a children’s play group; this unto itself is a job for at least ten people), be the heart of Voltron by encouraging the rest of the team and giving them advice, pilot the Blue Lion (which entails plenty of dangerous and exhausting aerial and hand-to-hand combat), generate wormholes, be the “support brain” with her knowledge of alien tech/culture/races/etc.—the list could probably go on. This poor girl has been turned into the show’s workhorse, and not even realistically so either. She should be exhausted, worn out, maybe not broken—at least in her resolve—but completely drained by being pulled every which way all the time. But she’s the same enthusiastic, inspiring, almost peppy girl we met at the beginning, which implies that either Alteans have utterly incomprehensible reserves of energy or that the writers don’t care about writing her realistically, they just want her to do all their work for them.

This noble princess has also now been effectively dethroned, with the loss of the Castle and her crown—despite the fact that there are Alteans still out there who, now that Lotor is gone, will quite possibly be looking to her for leadership. This loss of any significant position of power or status aside from being the pilot of the Blue Lion was made abundantly clear when Allura, technically the ruler of the Altean diaspora and leader of the Voltron coalition, was put into a Galaxy Garrison cadet uniform. This was an insult to all the paladins, but most especially to Allura, as it indicates she is now subservient to a government military organization for a country and planet she isn’t even a resident or citizen of (a la the Avengers submitting to a government agency via the Accords in CA:CW). Allura has been stripped of any and all reasons for recognition except her status as a paladin. That (aside from her doing almost all the work to get everything done) is the only reason she still remains relevant.

She’s also been put into relationship roulette. I am thoroughly convinced that Monsanto was setting her up to be paired with Keith during the first two seasons (they spend a lot of time together, and aside from Keith and Shiro’s relationship theirs was developed by far the most out of anyone on the team during that time). Then, when the fans didn’t jump on board that ship and (at least when Allura was involved) tended to look more toward Lance or Shiro as possible romantic interests for her, they did their usual waffling routine and backed off, sticking a toe into the Shallura pool (the “hand touch” bit in S2 and the seesawing tension between Allura and Kuron) before doing their level best to get Shiro out of the story completely and sticking Allura with Lance instead. Now, I’m not against the trope where the guy has a crush on the girl and the girl at first doesn’t like him but eventually comes around (see Han Solo and Princess Leia for one of my favorite examples of this being done properly), but in this particular instance it feels more like the girl being turned into a plot device and stuck with whatever guy the writers decide doesn’t have enough payoff in the story otherwise. It’s fully possible that, written right, Lance and Allura could have ended up together quite plausibly. But the way it has actually been done—extremely arbitrarily with little development of their relationship or healthy growth of either character—it’s a travesty for both of these wonderful people.

Shiro has been taken from his position as The Leader and The Hero, which he filled far more effectively than Keith (see my Sorting Hat Chats analysis of the characters, as well as below) and been turned into fourth tree from the left (right alongside Coran, Krolia, and Romelle). He’s been given the consolation prize of piloting the ridiculous and totally stupid and unnecessary Atlas, but aside from that he—rather like Allura with her status as Blue Lion pilot—has no other relevance to the story.

Plus (and this is a major bone I have to pick with Monsanto) he was arbitrarily given a magic muscle disease that has never been mentioned or alluded to at any point before S7—and then Word of God revoked its existence in the show’s present time because “he’s technically a clone so he’s magically cured.” Aside from this appalling behind-the-scenes wand-waving being an absolute and total writing mortal sin, it makes absolutely no sense because Keith apparently knew about it and yet made no mention of it for six seasons, even when his friend, who apparently needed magical wristbands to keep him healthy, was in an alien prison for a year with no treatment. Shiro should be a total decrepit wreck in 1x01 after going that long without proper treatment. Yet he’s not only fine, he’s able to engage in hand-to-hand combat with five enemies less than two days after escaping (see the 1x01 fight in the cruiser hangar). This is deus ex machina at its absolute and total worst.

And… okay, I’m going to really rant for a bit. Buckle up, buttercups, it’s about to get messy.

So down to brass tacks: Shiro and Adam’s relationship. I don't care if you want to view it as romantic or platonic. Any way you slice it, portraying this relationship as loving, affectionate, and admirable in canon or fandom is an insult to anyone who has loved ones willingly going into danger or away from home for long periods of time—astronauts, military members, law enforcement, firefighters, pilots, sailors, students studying abroad, missionaries and social workers in foreign countries, heck, let's throw in a good chunk of scientists for good measure, as well as the canon characters Colleen and Katie Holt, the McClain and Garrett families, and Mr. Kogane. And that's just the first ones that come to my mind. There are many, many others.

Let’s take a look first at exactly what was involved in the infamous “don’t count on me being here” scene. Shiro has some weird disease that means his health is going to decline in a few more years (see the bone picking above). Despite protests from higher-ups (which, this being a military organization, an admiral saying that a lieutenant cannot/should not participate in a mission should have utterly slammed the door on even the possibility of Shiro going), Shiro has decided to go on the Kerberos mission. Back in 1x05 Sam Holt referred to being in space for “the next two months”. Because Pidge, normally a very accurate scientist, said “it takes months for our ships to get out here” in 1x01 when passing Kerberos, I’m going to give Sam the benefit of the doubt and assume the “two months” is referring to the trip to Kerberos only. So, two months there, two months back, probably no more than two weeks exploring (this is to a degree a token voyage, after all; presumably after its success more rigorous explorations would be conducted). So I’ll give it a generous total time of five months, at most. Five months. Foreign exchange students are gone from home longer than that. And, considering the amount of contact modern astronauts are able to have with people back on Earth, I highly doubt the Kerberos guys were radio silent during their trip. And despite his apparent muscle problem there are no health ramifications for Shiro going on the mission (as in, going won’t make his condition worse). So we’re looking at five months of long-distance relationship, essentially. This is way, way better than many people with loved ones in, say, the military get.

Now, "Don't count on me being here when you get back"—this is emotional manipulation, plain and simple, using threats to the relationship as leverage to get what the speaker wants out of the other person. It is almost identical to saying "if you do X I'll never speak to you again" or "if you do X I'll break up with you", a common verbal threat tactic in abusive relationships. I have a good friend who was in a relationship like this, and the ugliness of that breakup has ramifications even years later, both socially and in my friend's mental well-being. I also knew other people in (non-romantic) friendships with somebody who used similar types of phrases and manipulation to get them to do what she wanted. The strain ultimately tore apart the friend group. These sorts of phrases and tactics are red flags of the highest degree and indicate a relationship that is in no way, shape, or form healthy.

So. Adam doesn't want Shiro to leave for the five-month trip, ostensibly for Shiro's health. But we have no indication that the Kerberos Mission poses any sort of risk to Shiro's health, preexisting medical conditions included. Which means what's really at stake here is Adam just doesn't want Shiro to go and is using any possible reason or tactic, no matter how flimsy or manipulative, to push that goal. This is horribly self-centered and appears to be based entirely in a selfish desire to have Shiro around as much as possible for as long as possible without any consideration for Shiro's desires and dreams (it's made pretty clear that the Garrison, space exploration, and the Kerberos Mission have been Shiro’s dream and goal for years if not his whole life). To even consider this as anything less than selfish possessiveness is dangerous and downright insulting to Shiro, as well as to every single person who has loved ones gone for long periods of time and/or in dangerous circumstances.

Net result: no matter how you read Shiro and Adam's relationship, we should all be glad that Shiro GOT OUT.

(And relationship drama is possibly one of the oldest, cheapest methods for easy plot tension out there. It requires little to no effort on the part of the writer and can create lots of drama without anybody getting developed, just lots of “but you said you loved me!” type stuff ad nauseam. The families of the other paladins have gotten developed, or at the very least been given cameos; why not, instead of using a cheap relationship trick to give fourth-tree-from-the-left Shiro any sort of interest in S7 at all, give us some background info on him? All we know about him is that he worked for the Garrison. We know nothing about his parents, if he has any siblings… we could have gotten so much more, and yet the writers stuck us with this idiotic hogwash.)

Okay, mini-mega-rant over. Moving on…

Keith’s been strongarmed into a leadership role for which he is painfully not suited. To make this square-peg-in-round-hole setup work the writers have copy-pasted a good chunk of Shiro’s personality on top of the erstwhile lone wolf, turning Keith into a schizophrenic who oscillates wildly between inspiring noble leader and the shy, blunt, anger-prone guy we all came to love in the first two seasons. (That is not to say Keith is incapable of being a good leader; see aforementioned Sorting Hat Chats analysis. But this is not the way to get Keith to be a good leader.) To prevent this poor jerry-rigged human from being completely outshone, Shiro has, as I said before, been stripped of almost all personality and pushed as far back into the scenery as possible without disappearing entirely (and Monsanto has outright said they think he’s dumb and boring and wanted to get rid of him. But they were afraid of fan backlash when, for some weird reason, the fans actually liked him. So they didn’t kill him off and opted instead to be their usual spineless chicken selves and not pick a plotline, nominally keeping him around while making Shiro pretty much useless).

Lance is being made to operate as “Voltron’s right hand,” which runs counter to the lore established in S1 and 2 and, thanks to Keith’s writer-induced schizophrenia, means he’s actually leading Voltron by proxy because Keith has latched onto him as the strategist and moral compass (when Keith’s “Shiro personality” isn’t coming out). This has locked Lance into a particular role, when he actually operates best shifting to fit whatever role the situation calls for (again, see the Sorting Hat Chats analysis for more on this). The poor guy is really starting to come across as dragged over the coals and put on the rack; he’s take an awful beating at the hands of the writers and is worn down and damaged with no sign of relief. He seems to be getting Allura as a consolation prize, but as I said before this is a disservice to both of these characters and really just throws Lance’s suffering in his face.

Hunk and Pidge have largely been left by the wayside. Hunk was barely a step up from joining the line of trees in the first place, as the balmera arc was the only place he really shone (he’s had a few bits in episodes here and there, maybe—maybe—once a season, but more as a “look, we haven’t forgotten he exists!” thing than any sort of real character development). And Pidge, once she completed her “find my family” arc, faded into the background right along with Hunk. She tends to be a smidge more prominent than he does, if only because she’s the computer geek—and because she’s the team’s other girl, since Monsanto is all over that doggone “representation” bandwagon—but she’s largely served her purpose and now is simply the tech whiz plot device.

And… oh, good Lord. Don’t even get me started on the rest of the cast. Coran has never gotten a huge amount of development, but to be fair he’s always kind of been a goofy Alfred so it makes sense that we wouldn’t peel back his layers too much. He’s nominally interesting but largely there to help the other characters do their thing. But all the Holts have pretty much just been pawns in Pidge’s arc—we’ve seen so little of Matt Holt as to have no real idea of his personality at all (most of what we “know” is actually fandom-developed), and although Sam proved useful for the “return to Earth” bit he’s only gotten a little more development than his son. Krolia too was pretty much just a plot device for Keith’s arc and finding the Altean colony; since then she’s just disappeared into the scenery to become second tree from the left. Romelle has earned true MacGuffin status, as the literal only thing she has done for the story is reveal Lotor’s treachery (despite the fact that she, along with Krolia, is a powerpack of a character and could probably take down the empire single-handed if given the opportunity).

Plus the villains have been shortchanged along with everyone else. Part of the reason, I think, so many people loved Lotor as a bad guy was because he actually had a pretty good motive and a well-developed personality. He was a whole person. Zarkon kinda was, a bit, since he was obsessed with the Black Lion and that at least gave him some sort of drive. But Haggar? Who, by the way, we haven’t seen since S6? Sendak? Pshh, please. Why on earth would Monsanto bother to give the bad guys motivation and personality? That would distract from Keith’s leadership arc, and Allurance! And—and space wolf! And explosions! And look, Voltron has a new power, so don’t look at the man behind the curtain through the plot holes you could drag a planet through!

I am so done with all this nonsense. So I’m going to go fix everything with fanfiction. Bye.

P.S. “Monsanto” is my admittedly derogatory version of “Monsantos”, the contraction I’ve often seen used to refer to Lauren Montgomery and Joaquim Dos Santos, the executive producers and master-not-minds of VLD.

[gear-project]

Elphelt Valentine: Bio & Trivia

==Elphelt Valentine==

"Family is... so wonderful!"

==Profile== Height: 5'6" Weight: Dreamy lbs (Unknown) Blood Type: Mysterious Birthplace: The Backyard Birthday: December 25 Eye Color: Sky Blue (formerly Emerald Green) Hobbies: Romantic Discussions, Pretending to be a Bush Dog Favorite Thing: Smiles, Sweets, Saving up for a Bush Dog Dislikes: Loneliness, Killing, Insects Weapon(s):

A Bouquet of flowers(?), Grenades, Magic Rifle, Magic Shotgun, Bazooka, Magnum Magic Rifle (Anti-Backyard Weaponry created from the Black Re-Tech Cyprus Project).

==Story (GGXrd Sign)==

<Unofficial Summary>

Originally Elphelt appeared in the Human World some time before Ramlethal Valentine did, and was given the orders to infiltrate among Humans, locate Sol Badguy, observe him, and see to it he did not awaken, while ensuring Justice could successfully be revived.

She was forbidden to Love other people, and yet somehow this conflicted with the idea of being connected with Humans.  This conflict in logic 'overloaded' her basic personality and caused it to split, creating a new 'kinder' personality on the surface.

Her first actions were to try and marry a Rock Star, but because her Valentine programming activated, she scared the man she was going to marry right off the altar, leaving her behind in her wedding dress!

It was then that she realized she was a Valentine, and decided to use her powers to find anyone who could stop the Conclave's plans.

Fortunately, her newly awakened powers somehow put her in the custody of Ky Kiske, KING of Illyria!

==Story (GGXrd Revelator)==

<Unofficial Summary>

Despite her attempts to help save the world, Elphelt's original mind programming had activated upon Justice' partial-revival.

Though she managed to recover her memories of Sol Badguy and her other friends and her original personality, the process was very traumatic, and by the time she was able to become aware of what had fully happened, she was already captured by Ariels.

Bedman put her in a dream-world to prevent her from experiencing more emotional trauma, but this only confused her, and eventually she awoke to the truth of her situation:

...She was to become the Soul Core of Justice.

==Story (GGXrd Rev2 After Story A)==

<Unofficial Summary>

Thanks to everyone's efforts, Elphelt finally got a good night's rest in a fluffy bed!

After everything that happened, would people be willing to accept El and her sister?

The day's Newspaper seemed to be a flicker of HOPE for the future...

==Personality Profile==

An adorable young woman who is obsessed with improving her feminine charm.  She loves animals and nature, and can't bear to see anyone alone.  Elphelt will charge into any problem head-first, shielded by impenetrable optimism.  Her efforts at improving the aforementioned charm, however, often fall short.  If you start a conversation about love, she'll start talking and won't stop--often taking off into flights of slightly strange fantasy.

==Outline==

Elphelt is one of the Valentines created by the Universal Will, who she calls "Mother".  Her mission is to assist Ramlethal in activating the Cradle, but unlike the other Valentines she appears to have human emotions.  When those emotions awaken, she discovers a boundless compassion for humankind and finds herself at odds with her original mission.  She chooses to find Ky Kiske and help him with his instead.  Originally destined to marry a Death Metal singer, Elphelt discovered her true identity during the ceremony and fled.  She still wears her wedding dress.

During the Cradle Incident, she lends her strength to Sol, but in the final moments, she loses all semblance of emotion and begins to execute her destiny, and everything around her.  While Sol manages to wake her up, she is taken away by the Universal Will, to complete Justice.

==Movelist== ———————————Specials (Handgun Shot: press/mash Heavy-slash repeatedly) Bridal Express (Also Aerial) Pineberry (Grenade): Pin Pull >High Toss (Also Aerial/Can be shot) >Low Toss (Can be shot) Ms. Confire (Rifle) >>Fire (can be fully Locked on) >>>Reload >Put Away Ms. Travailler (Shotgun) >>Poke >>Launch >>Roll >>CQC >>Fire (can be fully Locked on) >>>Reload >Put Away Roll Aim with Ms. Travailler ———————————Overdrive/Chaos Attack Judge Better Half Genoise (Bazooka) *Mistranslated as Genoverse* ———————————Instant Kill Magnum Wedding ———————————

==Trivia== ——————————— --When Elphelt first appeared, her outfit was a Bridal gown, but most notably she wore a Four Leaf Clover (in Pink and Green colors).  It's implied that after Sign's events Ramlethal put the clover on her hat as a symbol of her determination to save her sister. --Elphelt's Japanese voice actress Aya Suzaki liked her role SO much, she also voices side characters in other Arcade Episodes, particularly Kum Haehyun's Episode that was released later on. --Elphelt's Respect "Power Up" animation is a joke reference to the original Valentine in GG2 who transformed when Sol confronted her.  Elphelt says she wishes she could do cool stuff like that! --The black "boss" form Elphelt took at the end of Xrd Sign is a reference to the Darkside Color palette found in older game Survival Modes.  As expected, she was no match for Sol though!  Despite the fact we couldn't fight her in that form, she had a very strong "Boss Mode" in M.O.M. mode in Xrd Sign! --It isn't immediately apparent, but Elphelt's "Seal Device" (complete with Valentine Visor, ala Justice), has two black-winged Rose "bits" that Elphelt can summon IN her boss form, as if she were a Danmaku heroine!  All Elphelt's guns surround these bits and fire upwards, creating her attack "Rain of Judgement". --It's also implied that Lucifero's "two halves" (Belpha and Venus) are references to Ramlethal and Elphelt respectively, suggesting Venus is Elphelt's Servant. --It can be argued that Elphelt is an ascended fangirl of Guilty Gear, particularly the type of fan who ships romantic relationships between two random characters! --Elphelt was especially happy when Sin called her a friend... he was literally the first friend she ever had! --The Universal Will asked Sol to look after Elphelt and Ramlethal, and while that complicates Ky's family tree a bit... it can be said that Elphelt is technically Sin's cousin once removed. --Elphelt's Arena Bio still describes her as a Merciless Apocalypse. --May's inability to pronounce Elphelt's name might be a stealth reference to how Ramlethal was mistakenly localized in English as "Ramletherl", or in Elphelt's case "Erfert". ———————————

==References== ——————————— --Elphelt's weapons are references to various sweets (just like the original Valentine): Pineberry is a White Strawberry cultivar based on a Pineapple. Confire (Confaire) is a French Confit Preservative. Travailler (Trav-aye-ae) "To Labor" is a name for a French Pink Martini. Genoise (Geno-wass) is a Sponge Cake. --Elphelt's move "Judge Better Half" is symbolically a reference to when couples Cut the Wedding Cake during the Wedding Reception after getting Married.  Couples often tried to kiss over the cake without knocking the highest tier over.  It's also considered bad luck to cut the top-most tier of the cake! --Wedding Cakes come from Roman tradition as a sign of fertility. --Elphelt's military fighting style references Cable and B.B.Hood from Marvel VS Capcom 2, as well as Chris Redfield from UMvC3. She often says war movie catchphrases like "Fire in the Hole" and "Incoming!" --The Heavy Metal band "Bride" out of Kentucky did an album titled "Shotgun Wedding". --Elphelt's a walking stealth reference to "Guns'N'Roses". ———————————

You may now Kiss the Bride?

[beck-a-leck]

could you do arthur and frey for the kiss prompt please 🥺 I don't know which number, so you can pick!

NONNY YOU READ MY MIND! Or at least half of it. Because I had decided to do a little Frey and Arthur Smooch Prompt after skimming the list last night. Hope you don't mind that I put it in the Empress Frey Universe, and maybe added a touch of the Consort Arthur AU to it also.

(if you want one from in-game canon, Nonny, feel free to come back and send in another prompt)

I was in the mood for a masquerade ball!

Send me a Smooch Prompt and some characters!

I picked #8 A gentle Kiss On The Hand

Frey paused just inside the threshold of the doorway, hidden in the shadows. She peeked around the corner at the packed ballroom, filled with people in their finest all milling about and mingling. The musicians were playing, servants skillfully navigated the crowds with trays of refreshments. She didn’t recognize a single face in the crowd, but that was kind of the point of a masquerade, wasn’t it?

Frey ran her hands nervously over her costume’s elaborate skirt. She wished she could attend the ball under a mask of anonymity, but that would also defeat the purpose of the masquerade. Frey had a mask, but it hardly concealed her identity. She wasn’t supposed to be the one hidden tonight. Out there, among the dozens of attendees, hid her suitors. The men offered up by other nations in the world to court her, to try and charm their way into her heart to gain the political favor of the Sechs Empire.

It was all a formality. Frey and her advisors had already signed a quiet agreement with Norad that she was to wed one of the kingdom’s many princes – which prince, she was uncertain – but to avoid ruffling any feathers out in the wider world, Sechs had openly invited all the world to present their best eligible bachelors. Naturally, each bachelor had come with a tempting trade agreement, or other political benefits, it wasn’t like this marriage was actually about something so trivial as love. In the spirit of appearing fair, the masquerade had been proposed as the Great Courting’s opening event.

All of her suitors were hidden behind a mask, ideally nothing could be given away about their nationality or politics. They would truly have to rely on their charm to get Frey’s attention. Only once they had the eye of the Empress would she look at what else they brought to the table.

“Empress, if you’re ready…” General Wagner stood at her side, dressed in a costume that resembled, of all things, a Pomme Pomme.

“Yes, I’m ready.” Frey smoothed her skirt and made a final adjustment to her mask. Her costume had been modeled after a monster as well, and she thought Skadi would be flattered to know how synonymous the Hunter Wolf and the Empress had become over the years. It wasn’t unexpected, given the way Frey had come to her Empire atop her fierce Hunter Wolf, and Frey thought it suited her far more than a dragon. Likening oneself to a god was more her predecessor’s style.

Wagner nodded and stepped through the door. A hush fell over the crowd and Frey could see all eyes turn to face the General. His voice carried across the room as he said a few words of welcome and then announced Frey.

She stepped into a spotlight, hearing the intake of breath before their guests broke into applause. Frey held her head high as she stepped up beside General Wagner. She fully knew the image she cut, in a dazzling gown made of gold to evoke the Hunter Wolf’s pelt, her mask was gold and gemstones, shaped like a muzzle, fangs and all. Some had tried to tell Frey her mask was too intimidating, she wanted to appear open to her suitors, not scare them off. Frey had bared her own teeth and commented that if her suitors were too cowardly to approach a woman in a mask, then they certainly weren’t going to have any luck courting her.

“Empress, I humbly present your suitors.” Wagner, with a small flourish, gestured to the crowd.

Bodies pushed their way to the front of the crowd, lining up front and center for Frey’s perusal. Her green eyes scanned over them, picking up on differences and costumes of the dozen men intending to court her. There was no hiding certain things about some of her suitors, the Elvish Prince had hardly bothered to tend to the masquerade theme, and while the Univir had done his best to make his horn appear as part of the costume, Frey could tell it wasn’t. She wondered which of these suitors was her prince.

Frey spoke her prepared words of welcome to the guests, hopefully easing any remaining tension from the international guests – Sechs had, until recent years, been the enemy of many nations and some of them were understandably wary deep in former enemy territory. As she finished her speech the band behind her started playing, launching into a gentle waltz to get people in the mood to begin dancing. Frey descended the stage, and one by one, was introduced to her suitors.

She had identified the Elvish Prince correctly, he was tall and slim, he moved gracefully and spoke gently, if boldly, as he claimed Frey’s first dance of the evening. There was mischief glinting in the crystal blue eyes behind a silvery mask that almost matched his hair, a playfulness that suggested he didn’t actually expect to be chosen but was happy for any excuse to party. He wasn’t wrong, it wouldn’t be politically prudent for the Empress to marry a prince who would outlive her for decades, if not centuries, figuring out succession would be a nightmare.

There was a suitor who was built tall and powerful, like Bado had been, but the similarities ended there. His hair was jet black and his eyes were molten gold, and thought he had done his best to conceal the give-away sign of his ears, Frey suspected this was the Dwarven Chieftain. If not for Norad, his would be one of the more politically advantageous marriages, a form of reparations after the way Ethelberd had devastated the Dwarven people during his reign.

The Univir was very shy and soft-spoken, and he radiated discomfort. Frey suspected he didn’t care much for large group settings like this, but she would like to have a one-on-one conversation with him before he went home. She understood so little of the Univir people, but she’d heard rumor that they had worked closely with an Earthmate in recent years. Said Earthmate may also be the only reason the Univir elder deigned to come to the ball and offer himself as a suitor, but that really was just court gossip.

The majority of her suitors were human, as she expected. There was one who proclaimed himself a wizard and produced a flower from thin air for Frey to prove it. It was a cute trick, but not all that impressive given the scope of magic Frey herself was intimately familiar with. There was a suitor who Frey was almost certain was from the merpeople, though it was difficult to be certain beneath his costume. That surprised Frey, she didn’t think the Sea Kingdom cared much for the politics of the surface world, but at the same time, when an Empress put out an open invitation for suitors, who wouldn’t respond even out of politeness.

After what felt like an hour of meeting her suitors, the final man approached her. He was the most elaborately costumed, nearly all of his head was covered by hat and mask. He had dressed in greens and white with embellishments of silver. There were patterns in the costume, hints in the plumage of his hat and made Frey think of an old friend. Recognition tickled at the back of her mind. It had to be a coincidence, there was no reason to suspect one of her suitors would have designed himself after a Divine Dragon.

Garnet eyes sparked behind his mask, and he bowed to her. She caught a glimpse of fine blonde hair.

“Empress it is an honor to be in your presence,” he said in a low voice.

“I am honored by your presence,” Frey said automatically, she’d said the same to each suitor. “Thank you for coming.”

“Thank you for the invitation.” He smiled slightly at her, a small quirt of his lips. Once again, Frey was struck with recognition. Who was this man?

“I suspect you already have a number of dances queued up, but I hope, Empress, you’ll save one for me.”

“Of course.”

Then, in a move so bold none of the other suitors had attempted, he reached out and took her hand. Frey nearly pulled her hand from his grip on instinct, nobody just casually touched her anymore. But she denied her reflexes and let him lift her hand to his lips. He brushed his lips ever so gently against her knuckles. His eyes locked onto Frey’s as he lowered her hand.

“I’ll look forward to that dance, Empress.”

Frey drew her hand to her chest as he turned and disappeared into the crowd. Her heart was pounding, fluttering in an excited, flustering way. People didn’t flirt with her, that… that kind of thing didn’t happen. She could feel her cheeks grow warm under her mask as she scanned the crowd for that elaborate mask, but her suitor had managed to disappear.

Her other suitors were waiting for her attention. The Elven prince was approaching to lead her onto the dance floor as the music shifted into a new waltz. Frey took his hand and stepped onto the dance floor, but as she fell into the steps of the dance she couldn’t help but scan the crowd over her suitor’s shoulder and wonder who exactly was that masked man?