#idk i know its not all happy but its at least still upbeat

[allylikethecat]

our timezones are NOT in alignment (booo timezones) so i ended up listening to ttpd first and THEN i read atkh!! the only thing ill say about ttpd is that but daddy i love him was a win in my books and watching the hateful swifties lose their minds over the fact that a lot of the album was ab matty was gold. ANYWAY

todays chapter omg the build up i’m so excited to see what’s next with george maybe (hopefully?) talking to matty and more tragic matty backstories!!?? i love how charli is like “u guys are so dense ofc yall would be perfect together” and omg carly being protective over matty is the best thing ever i just need to wrap him up in a blanket forever

-🥤

Hello My Dear Smoothie Anon!

Timezones really are the worst! Mixed with me not getting it together and posting the chapter during my lunch break like I said I wasn't going to do lol But alas I couldn't sleep last night and woke up late and was rushing to get to work a lot more than anticipated lol

I had a lot of very complicated feelings about the album - but you're right, I'm glad that But Daddy I Love Him was at least a middle finger to the "fans" who were so awful about Matty last year. In terms of the rest of the album, I hope he's actually doing alright like that US Weekly article said. That was like... the perfect PR move and I'm so glad that someone on his side got it together enough to make it happen.

Now on to ACTUAL important things (at least in my delusional world lol) Thank you SO MUCH for reading omg I'm so happy to hear that you enjoyed the new All the King's Horses chapter!! I love Fictional!Charli so much and was like I must find a way for her to be there again lol She just wants Fictional!George to be happy and she is fully convinced getting together with Fictional!Matty would make them BOTH very happy! Fictional!Carly is also very much looking out for Fictional!Matty- they grew up together, she knows what he went through with his mother when they were kids- and she knows a lot more about that situation with the jockey than she's sharing... Fictional!Matty keeps everyone at arms length, even her, and if fictional!George gets past those defenses she will NOT be letting him hurt Fictional!Matty.

Thank you so much for reading and for sending me this ask and just like being all around lovely? I love chatting with you here in the inbox! I hope your Friday was lovely and that you have a great weekend!

❤️Ally

[bunnydexterloveselvis]

My ECU husband list because I'm bored (this is partially a joke) (please don't send hate I'm beggin) (might update if this gets a bunch of notes)

Dr. John Carpenter (Change of Habit, 1969) <3

Husband qualities:

-good with kids

-smart

-doctor (he can heal you)

-hot!!!!

-not perfect but he tries his best

-sings very well plays the guitar!! (good for bedroom time ;) )

-clean, he keeps his hair combed, face shaved, and skin and nails washed. i bet he smells nice. if he don't use cologne then you would smell hand soap probably. idk i feel like he's a compulsive hand washer (ocd??????? idfk)

-cozy and nice fashion sense

-genuinely wants to help people in need

-did i mention hot (look at the way he's staring you down in the above pic. lawdy!!)

Jess Wade (Charro!, 1969) (current brainrot as of writing this) <3

Husband qualities:

-pretty smart

-hot as hell!!!!!!!!!!

-cowboy (save a horse ride a cowboy)

-beard (sorry this gets a category on its own)

-can be mean when needed to and can protect himself

-good lord he has a veryyy high pain tolerance (good for bedroom time ;) )

-scars (some people like that right?? i do. someone please hear me out)

-i feel like he has a high body temperature so if you ever get cold he is there to warm you

-also fashion sense (he's a cowboy)

-is a sheriff so he can protect you (can protect you in general honestly)

-good lord he is hot!!!!!!!!!! sorry

-daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy? sorry. daddy-

-rough and would probably slap you if you wanted him to (also good for bedroom time ;) )

Ross Carpenter (GIrls! Girls! Girls!, 1962) <3

Husband qualities:

-smart

-h h h hh hot

-fisherman, he can bring food to the table

-he can cook full-blown meals!!! like dinner and breakfast and stuff!!! just imagine him cooking dinner for you.. i wouldn't know what to do! now who's gonna write the fic?? /hj

-young (ehh i mean whatever i love dilfs but ross is hot af)

-knows how to operate a boat

-can fight and protect

-sings!! very well actually!!! he can sing upbeat and happy, to slow and sultry, to, well, anything really!!

-knows how to treat a woman right

-can dance, normal upbeat dancing, or tango-like slow dancing

-btw did you see that "walls have ears" scene?? look down. good lord it isn't big it's huge (good for bedroom time ;) )

-pretty good with kids. he can tolerate them at least. if they listen well

-a bit protective actually

-love love love the shirts and pants he wears. and that hat. oh god i love him so much

OVERALL QUALITIES

-pretty smart

-hot n sexy af!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! good lord!!!!!!

-have jobs

-great fashion sense

-pretty good with kids

-outstanding in the bedroom

-can sing and/or play guitar

-unique in their own way

-all have their own imperfections but still try their best (lookin at you jess /lh)

-overall pretty loveable and husband material

-blue eyes and long eyelashes (yes this gets its own point. i like eyes. esp blue or brown eyes. and they twinkle at the right spot, oh yes im on my knees. love your eyes sm honey)

[imagineredwood]

What happened with you and your best friend?? If you don't mind me asking? You seemed so upbeat and happy when you had said you were enjoying time with them and even though I was sad you weren't as active anymore, I was happy that at least you were happy and were living life if that makes sense. IDK it just makes me sad to read that you're not friends anymore :( You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, I just feel for you

Essentially, I was replaced 🙃 We were glued at the hip, always together, spent time together as much as possible at work and as well as outside of work, two peas in a pod type thing. There was a lot of flirting and jokey verbal advances type talk that we just kept at bay but it did admittedly become a bit of a...homoerotic friendship with some dependency. And we had early plans for my birthday where we were going to hang the whole day that she more or less ghosted me for until like 4pm. And we had planned it for months, with her doing a great deal of the planning and telling me that she was going to do this and that and hyping the whole thing up telling me how she was going to spoil me....just to leave me hanging 🫠 when she finally answered she was just like oh well we can do it next weekend? And

And then come to find out it was basically all because she had gotten a new friend that also had kids and also drank a lot and I guess having a fellow mom as a bestie was better since they could have the kids together all the time as opposed to her having to find childcare when we hung out. So even though we were there for each other and shared some major life changes and events/family deaths...just for me to be traded in. And the day of my birthday when she ghosted me, it was because she was blackout drunk after partying all night with that other girl and didn’t wake up until then. But lied to me and said her phone died so her alarm didn’t wake her up. I didn’t find out the truth that she had been with that other girl until a mutual friend told me a few weeks later

Sorry I know its a lot lol I just felt like you deserved an actual answer. So this last year has really fucking sucked because of that because I lost my best friend but also kind of a partner? So I took the rest of the year to kinda grieve I guess? And try to heal. Still trying to work on it tbh but I decided that this new year I needed to go back to things that made me happy, like you guys and writing and this blog. So that's what I'm focusing on ❤️‍🩹

[calicodreamer]

Calico Reviews: Sun and Moon Show eps. 1-3

Welcome back to Calico rants about the Sun and Moon show to her tumblr page, because its to cringe to explain to people in real life.

We’re going to try to do at least three episodes a week, and then write down my notes so I can ramble about this to my Tumblr, become like, an actual content creator for the things that I like.

Does it count as spoilers for the show if its episodes 1-3? regardless, spoilers below

9:21 Montgomery Gator is the WORST Daycare ATTENDANT in VRCHAT

They have a Funny little intro right now! It's Cringe, and I would like them to not.

 I am looking forward to when they don’t. .

I had previously watched this episode during my trying to get all those juicy little lore bits by being picky and choosey with what I wanted to consume, and unluckily for me, there isn't a complete season one compilation for me to pick through

Moon, when we the audience are not looking through his perspective, hangs out in Vtuber form in the corner. We don’t see any of Sun's Vtuber model right now, but he does have one, so there's that.

Sun - upon the start of the video, is cleaning the day-care, Moon comes down to check on him. Sun is an upbeat happy guy, who is anxiously cleaning the day-care - this seems to be his only personality trait. Moon is snappy, uptight, and grumpy but overall quiet outside of when he is yelling, or being angry at Sun.

Sun has hired Monty the gator (Yes he’s here, no I don’t know why), for 1000$ dollars a second to look after the daycare for him for whatever reason. Why would they have this much money to afford to give it to Monty the gator?? Don’t ask me, they just do I guess. Moon hates Monty the Gator - this is a reasonable opinion of Monty the gator.

Moon has control of the bank account they have I guess.

Sun has to talk to Roxanne for whatever reason (Yes, Yes I do mean Roxanne wolf, No I don’t know why she’s here)

Monty sucks at his job - hence the title of the video. Monty is also an idiot, and happy music plays when he comes on screen, he also briefly thinks that Sun is a statue- this feels like Flanderization, even though this is an au, I hate that character choice, I wish they would not. 

Sun seems to be slightly intense about cleaning, he has a whole organization schedule. Moon can only be grumpy, I assume this is because Sun didn’t talk to him about anything he was doing that day, but eeeeeeeeeeeeeh - Moon stop being a dick to your brother.

There’s implied to be kids running around while everything happens, which is also concerning.

Monty leaves because Moon hates him for whatever reason, I dunno why. He was sent to get snacks and then doesn’t show up for the rest of the episode. I’m also glad Monty is gone, Fuck I hate this character.

Sun shows up, upset that Monty has messed everything up, Moon is largely apathetic to the whole situation. 

9:06 Sun and Moon MOVE to SPACE in VRCHAT

We are still intro-ing, I would still like us to not be. I have to forcibly remind myself that this channel is meant for kids every time the intro comes on, and that If I watch like five episodes a day I can get through this in 2 months.

I am not going to watch five episodes a day

They (The people) told me to watch this episode, You really don’t have to. Nothing of major importance here, but there is funny nonsense happening. 

Moon is starting a ponzi scheme I guess, or atleast is implied to have business deals with “Someone” or people? Idk between this and insisting how “Animatronic” they are I’m beginning to loose it.

Monty the gator is also here (For SOME reason), and he has a space station apartment building that he is using to actively kill people to get more money, they only reason Moon cares about it is because Sun spent 50,000,000 dollars on an apartment for Moon to live in, because he thinks Moon hates him (Poor baby), and wanted Moon to be able to have his own space.

Moon has to walk Sun through what sarcasm is a couple times. Sun you sweet precious baby. And remind him that No he doesn’t actually hate him, and would prefer to live with Sun

Moon goes to Monty to get the Money back

Monty doesn’t wanna give the money back

Moon threatens to expose him

Monty gives the money back.

Apparently Sun spent even more money on a tv sold to him by Monty

Oh boy howdy, I hope this character trait of Sun being gullible isn’t around long.

Other notes:

It's Directly stated that they have a bank account, and that Moon has enough money to buy himself a house for whatever reason? Why is he buying himself a house? I don’t know. Where did they get the bank account from? I don’t know. WHY DO THEY HAVE-

There's also apparently enough money on this account to afford a funky little space station apartment, and a house.

Moon invent things, why? Idk personality traits.

But they do have a good dynamic going or whatever, and the voice acting for Moon is pretty good

17:51 Sun and Moon Play AMONG US in VRCHAT

THERE IS NO INTRO LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Sun and Moon are playing among us, for some reason. With Some of the Funtime animatronics, Glamrock Chica, and Freddy - just regular old Freddy - he is here

Sun and Moon are canonically, Very Big boys, and have to crawl around the ship

This is just a Funny little episode, Nothing important lore wise happens here, but you do get more of Sun and Moons Dynamic. 

Sun walks around being anxious the entire time, and everything is too short for him to move around properly. Which is a shame that no ones drawn this scene yet because I think that would be hilarious - them just knuckle walking on the ground because they’re both too tall. 

“OMG YOU GUYS ARE CREEPILY WALKING EVERYWHERE!?!?”

“Bro, I am literally just trying to get around.”

Funtime Freddy has a stupid voice

also Funtime foxy what the fuck is up with your voice, I am literally begging you both not to show up again so I don’t have to hear you. I hate it.

Moon is so proud of himself for just doing anything - he could burn coffee and I'd still believe he was proud of himself

Moon has such a smug little voice and I’m 80% sure its all the deadpan tone he has when he’s not yelling. When he’s not being an edgy bastard he’s such a little goober. The dynamic between the two is very interesting, and I am HERE for it. 

Notable: Moon is Willing to Kill Sun, and kill for Sun without a second thought, Sun is willing to lie for his brother. Even to his own detriment. Sun is afraid of Moon to some degree in the episode? I'm not sure how much of a joke this is.

I am most certainly reading into it

Moon stop being an edgy goober for like, five seconds, I swear. The deadpan voice even makes him even better. I love him

Sun stop being Anxious challenge “level impossible”

This episode is just silly little filler, Not much of note happens.

Everyone is rabid, except for Sun who is a very good boy. I cannot wait to see him change that

Final thoughts:

So Overall, In the first three episodes. My favourite character is definitely Moon, mostly because I like his voice better. Sun and Moon definitely have some issues in their relationship, especially since Moon is grumpy, and Sun is constantly going out of his way to try and appease him most of the time.

Anyhow, hopefully this makes my watching of the series easier.

Previous post?:

[1d1195]

hiiii !!! i finished ding and i just jasndjfhkadjadj I ADORE them🥹 they truly are just perfect for each other (girl omggg i NEEEEED a future blurb about the rematch and him winning he deserves it after all that anxiety😭 also you should do something where bc they do a rematch and none of them consider that first fight a real match IF HE WINS THE ONE STRIKE IN HIS LOSS COLUMN SHOULD JUST DISAPPEAR LMFAEJFKK)

I WAS SOOOOOO HAPPY TO SEE A TRADITIONAL BLURB !!!!! idk what it is about them but they just have a special place in my heart, i think when you were first posting the series i was just in a really different place in my life, not bad but not really good it was sort of an adjusting period, and i would get on here and read them and they just made me feel sooooo good and it was just a safe place to get lost in and everything. your writing truly is such a blessing thank you so much sam <3

AND THENNNNN last night i couldnt sleep so i was scrolling on here and i saw an anon mention committed and i realized I HADNT READ IT YET so you know i went back and read everything including their blurbs and ohhhh myyyy goodnessss😩😩 THEYRE SOOOOO ADORABLE they way they were just soooooooo down bad for each other ???? i need that otherwise it would never work between me and someone else. THE JEALOUSY BLURB WAS PERFECTION AND THEIR FIRST TIME ?????? AHHHHHHHHH

things are kinda boring on my end, it's officially iced coffee season again and i LOVE THAT. i CANNOT drink it during winter i already tend to run cold so that just pushes me off the edge and i just cant warm up again but now its hot out and im not sick anymore!!🥳 so thats fun

music wise i havent really been listening to anything new but i was on the phone with my sister this morning and i turned on Magic by 1D and its suchhh a fun song😭 ive been feeling more upbeat songs lately and that one has been on repeat ALSO last first kiss :))

hope your doing absolutely amazing lmk whats new with you what've you been up to ??

~🎶

Ahhhhh! Hi! I've been thinking of you! Glad to hear you're not sick anymore! I don't have very many new songs either--I'll have to look! I'm def PMSing so I'm looking for depressing songs to fit my mood rn lol. I'm back on my Noah Kahan kick. MAGIC IS SUCH A BOP. I use it to help me clean my apartment.

I'm so glad you liked Ding and I'm thinking that's a great idea 😉 I'll try to work it in!

That's really sweet about Traditional. It's def the series most people seem to like overall. I'm sorry you were in a tough place but it makes me happy you felt safe here on my little blog. It means a lot to me 💕

I loved Committed! I think it was a random idea (not super suggested) or at least I hope it wasn't because I can't remember. I just liked that TikTok that went with it 😂😂 They were oblivious little cuties for sure. Loved them 💕 SO glad you got to read something knew from me even though I'm def gonna be slow this week! I remember you saying you liked to read finished series so that's probably for the best. They were being annoying part way through if I recall. Not quite a cliffhanger but very Ross-Rachel just shut up and be together sort of thing 😉

I'm SCREAMING about iced coffee season. I drink it year round. My friends send me the snowblower memes during storms that say like "need anything from dunkin?" it's so me. I'm happy for you though! It's like it's officially summer once you start right? That's good news!

Tbh May was really tough for me in about every direction. I'm still kind of overwhelmed with a lot of stuff, but summer is looking more relaxed while still doing a bunch of things. The highlight of the last few weeks was probably reading my trashy romance book and going to a couple book stores and getting more books that I shouldn't have 🤭 It's also POLLEN SEASON around here and it's quite miserable. But it's okay, I will be fine. Just got to get through a few more days of craziness 😅

SO HAPPY TO HEAR FROM YOU! LOVE YOU!

xoxo

[commander-spaceboy]

Mannn i should talk about my ocs more cause i miss them u know?

Like there were 4 i rly cared about n i need to revamp all of them cause its been a while since ive drawn them but to kinda go through the list there was:

Jamie

He/Him, mid 20 something (i dont rember lol)

Hes a short hot headed jerk who used to be super super based off of me (less so now but the connections are still there)

He has these really cool fire abilities that are vaguely avatar fire bender like that develop with him and his character. Like when hes younger hes not able to use his own abilities without injuring himself so hes got burn scars on the palms of his hands and a little ways up his arms. But as he grows he learns better control and eventually can use them without hurting himself at all (though if his not carful he can definitely still get burned.)

Kai

He/him, mid to late 20s

Hes a big laidback golden retriever type guy who in general was just along for the ride of whatever was happening with everyone else. He was Jamie’s bf so u know the calm and collected to his insane fire guy shenanigans.

He was the government mandated werewolf’s oc and i love love love him sm, he had a couple of younger brothers too if I remember correctly.

May (or Ray I actually cant remember but tbh i dont think it matters rn)

She/They, early 20s

Jamie’s younger sister, has a bit of his headstrong attitude but shes more laidback than him. They are a lot more personable then him which makes her seem more bubbly and happy.

I donnnt remember if they had any abilities?? Tbh i think it would be cool if she was like the ice to jamies fire, but thats a thought for later me

And lastly,

Connie (name is very subject to change)

She/her, mid 20s

Shes more of a stricter leader type character, even if she doesnt actually lead anyone,, shes got like garnet (steven universe) vibes im my mind.

Her abilities had something to do with light beams/ laser type attacks, something something powers are fueled by the sun, if shes not seen sunlight for a while her powers become weaker until shes unable to use them till she can recharge in the sunlight again.

Theres more characters in universe but they are like the main 4 and were the most fleshed out back then

Their universe has always been like a twilight (like the book/movies w werewolves n vampire) type shtick u know? Dark and gritty type atmosphere but with characters who are more upbeat. (like everyone except jamie)

N u know idk i might draw all of them again at some point soon cause its been probably a year since the last time i draw jamie,, and the rest of them its been like at least 3 or more

[nadisabug]

Just Shut Up

Pairing: Daichi Sawamura x gn!reader

Requested: @sugarlips000​

Warnings: SPOILERS for Interhigh Arc!!! hurt to comfort, angsty, theres fluff at the end I promise just wait 

Summary: It’s after the game and you’re trying to cheer up Daichi when he snaps at you. 

A/N: It’s never too much to ask!!! I loved writing this even though it felt a little ooc of Daichi BUT we all get that way you know it all becomes too much and you snap idk its just relatable but anyways sorry i took so long i was busy with the holidays but i hope you enjoy <3

Haikyu!! Masterlist

Everything seemed slow motion. 

Kageyama went for the ball, tossing it above his head. Hinata ran, then jumped. His arm moved so, so slow. The slap of a hand hitting the ball rang out in the room. I waited with bated breath to hear the slap as it hit the ground. 

But something interrupted it. A ba-dum, akin to a heartbeat rang out instead. The ball hit the block then fell. I watched in horror as four boys, one of them my boyfriend, dived with all of their might, crashing into each other. But they couldn’t reach it. The ball hit the floor. On our side. During match point. 

We were done. We lost. 

I bit back tears and turned to Saeko. She pulled me into a fierce hug. I did my best to hold back my tears but it was hard. The boys had worked so hard for this just to lose at the last moment- it was too much. 

I gave Daichi his space after the game, knowing the best thing for him was to be with his team. They were the only ones who really understood him right now. I knew my words could only go so far, and would probably be unwelcome with the loss still so fresh. 

So I went home with Saeko. I didn’t bother to find him after the game and have him walk me home like he usually did. He most definitely wouldn’t be in the mood. Plus I thought I heard from Saeko that the boys were going to dinner after the game. 

We didn’t text that night. He always needed space when he was upset, despite how hard it was for me to give it to him. He always asked for space after we fought. All I wanted to do is rush into his arms and comfort him, but I knew that’s not what he needed. So, I didn’t text him. 

The next morning I waited outside my house like usual. He always walked me to school unless he had morning practice, which I very highly doubted they would have after this game, so I waited. 

I was just about to head to school on my own when he turned the corner. I smiled and waved at him, but he didn’t reciprocate. This loss must have hit him harder than I thought. 

“Sorry I’m late,” he apologized gruffly. 

“It’s okay,” I smiled. I tried to act as upbeat as possible, praying my happiness would infect him. 

We started walking, but it didn’t seem like he wanted to talk. So I talked for him. I paused every moment or so to see if he wanted to join in, but all he did was grunt in response. I was hoping my talk would cheer him up, or at the very least get his mind off the game. 

“So we have that big project in English coming up, and I figure we’re going to be partners like always, so I was thinking for-”

“God will you just shut up?” Daichi snapped. He stopped walking to fix me with a hard glare. 

I stumbled to a stop as well, shocked by his tone. 

“I... I sorry,” I mumbled. I felt tears begin to prickle at my eyes, but I did my best to hold them back. 

“Oh no, Y/n,” Daichi rushed to get the words out of his mouth. “Y/n I’m sorry I didn’t mean to say that I just I just-”

He reached out to cradle my face but I took a step backwards. 

“No it’s okay, I get it. I was just trying to get your mind off of it but obviously it’s too soon.” I tried to walk away but Daichi grabbed my wrist and held on tightly. 

“No Y/n, it isn’t that it’s too soon it’s just I-” Daichi bit his lip. “I’ve been so strong around the boys I just- I just don’t want to pretend nothings wrong. Not with you.”

My face fell, understanding flowing through me. This poor boy has been pretending that nothing was wrong for so long that he didn’t even stop to let himself feel. 

I pulled him into a hug and immediately he started to sob, big heaving sobs. I rubbed his back and whispered to him, comforting him like he should have had this whole time. 

He cried for a while, letting it all out. 

After the crying subsided I pulled away a little. “Wanna head back to my place, skip school?”

He smiled softly and nodded. 

“We can watch a shitty movie and cuddle. Come on,” I prodded him with a smile, tugging on his hand. 

Even when he asked later in the afternoon to go practice, I knew he’d be okay. I knew because he had the boys to lean on. 

And now me.

Taglist:

Taglists are open! Shoot me an ask or a dm with what fandom you want to be tagged in and I’ll do it right away! :)

[qwirk]

*vigilantes ch. ~64 and main manga ch. ~255 spoilers*

although idk if these are really spoilers if these chapters came out a couple years ago! anime-only fans beware. anyway here’s my extremely long rant about the obvious, not trying to explain anything- i gotta yell!

so that vigilantes arc destroyed me! i’m not good at immediately putting thoughts about media into coherent points but i’m just so sad :( first of all after catching up with the main manga, shirakumo, despite being technically dead during his introduction, rocketed up to one of my favorite if not my favorite character. aizawa is also up there for me- he was first introduced as this strict teacher who seemed to psychologically torment his students for the fun of it, or at least for some yet unknown ulterior motive. but we now know that, while still kinda harsh, he does this to give his students that lead-dropping-in-the-pit-of-your-stomach rush in order to push them to succeed (or something like that?). he truly cares about his students and their growth which has been demonstrated multiple clear times. but what drives him to be like this??

shirakumo!! his actions today are a clear answer to the pushes shirakumo gave him back when they were students. they’re so obviously influenced by shirakumo that they’re almost literally answers. the main chapters are a little foggy because i speedread them at 3 am, but i just caught up with vigilantes. 

at the start, aizawa sees himself as someone who’s constantly just behind and will stay there as everyone moves on. he trudges into class drenched after leaving the kitten behind and he’s super emo about it. meanwhile, shirakumo literally flies through the window, also drenched, saved not only the kitten but aizawa’s umbrella, and manages to put on this cheery (albeit borderline explicit) show about it. it’s a CLEAR contrast between the two and aizawa goes as far to say that he hasn’t reached his “true self yet” while he looks at shirakumo and then says that he starts to change. 

as if it’s not enough for aizawa to beat himself up mentally, his classmates bring him down for not having a “heroic” enough quirk. shirakumo is constantly stepping in to bring him back up, even during real work study stuff, and goes as far to lend him a pair of his goggles so that his eyes become more useful. this becomes a stronger bonding point between aizawa, shirakumo, and hizaishi for them to start looking to the future together. while wearing those goggles, which are protecting his sight from the strong winds on the roof, he stares into the sky, feeling like he’s getting swept into the future like the clouds in the wind. (also the clouds as a metaphor. damn)

and then we come to the last fight. everyone that aizawa looks up to is crushed in the wake of the villain, and he’s the last one standing. there’s a group of children to protect, and he’s panicking and drowning in his overthinking. the way he’s given a huge panel to himself only to be visually overwhelmed by his thought bubbles stood out to me. and then the thing that snaps him out is shirakumo’s voice cheering him on. it’s a bunch of simple praise, but it means everything in the situation. the friend who’s been pulling him up no matter how hopeless or apathetic aizawa feels is of course the one to spur him into action in a life-or-death situation. aizawa realizes he’s gotta fight immediately, and even reminds himself of exactly what shirakumo told him- that his quirk IS useful and levels the playing field. 

i was already kinda spoiled for this part since i read the main manga first, but hearing shirakumo’s cheering the entire time while aizawa is absolutely toiling to defeat this huge villain would have been touching regardless. and when he lands in triumph, hurting but victorious, he screams for his friend to hear that he did it!! but then you see this joy start to like. rot away as soon as it pans to kayama and hizaishi. it’s raining again (THE CLOUDS AS A METAPHOR! DAMN!). shirakumo’s corpse is lying feet away from him, staining the medics’ sheet with blood. i don’t have much to say about this part, it was just a lot for me to process!! also i’m still not entirely sure about the way his speaker works so i might be wrong here, but did he really spend his dying moments with a traumatic head injury cheering on his friend to not only beat the immediate danger, but to self-realization?? or maybe it was prerecorded? idk but either way, truly a hero. 

aizawa and hizaishi are left standing in the rain because once again, “it fits the mood.” so obviously there’s the callback to when aizawa first said that when he comes to class after leaving the kitten and i have yet to fully comprehend it because i have no braincells for interpreting media. i guess maybe it’s like- aizawa at first felt terrible for not being able to save even a kitten while being enrolled in the most prestigious hero course in the country. getting drenched while settling with (what he considers to be) a cowardly measure is the icing to the cake for his self-hatred. it’s the classic “this might as well happen” scenario to get soaked by random rain or a car splashing you with a puddle on a bad morning. rain is sad. but in comes shirakumo, equally drenched but still the bright light that he is. he’s also done everything aizawa couldn’t but wanted to and more in this situation. he could do it not just because of his storing quirk, but because he held the life of someone who needed saving more important than the school rules. this decorum lets the kitten slide as it makes itself at home in the classroom. the rain stops soon after. but then you have shirakumo’s death. once again, aizawa, and even hizaishi, who’s usually always upbeat (almost every panel of him was just him screaming YEAHHHHH. plz give him more dialogue) both agree that the pouring rain fits the mood. this also brings us back to the present that preceded the flashback- koichi just rescued a cat and a child from a villain with aizawa’s help, and now they’re standing under an awning to escape the rain. this situation is literally almost exactly what happened at the beginning of the flashback which is why i guess it brought it on, but it’s interesting to see what changed- aizawa is the one who’s learned from this situation and teaching the student the meaning of responsibility (using an abandoned cat as an example, no less), and they’re all properly shielded from the elements this time. i guess the conclusion (that could be totally wrong) i’m coming to is that the rain sort of represents the adversaries aizawa faces in life- his self-deprecation, those that don’t believe in him, his personal failures that he has been facing lately. shirakumo has always been there to guide him past it, and once he lifts up aizawa nothing can shake him again. but now that he’s definitively gone, it’s back to haunt him for this one last moment of sheer grief. it’s only this one moment though, as aizawa clearly uses this moment to move on and better himself not just for his sake, but for everyone counting on him. he’s escaped the rain.

it’s so clear how this manifests in the main manga and i’m so happy vigilantes was able to spin out such a good backstory and explanation for his actions!! one of the most immediate ways we see his ideals stand out is his taking in of shinsou as his apprentice from general studies. it’s absolutely because he sees himself in this boy. he has a quirk that’s seemingly useless once you get into combat and everyone thinks he’s a creep for it. more people might even wary around shinsou than aizawa’s case. during the a vs. b practice fights, shinsou explains what he did wrong, clearly upset at himself for not doing enough. aizawa immediately pulls himself up, reminding him that in order to achieve what he just said, he’d have to be a pro, and that what he managed was more than enough. these parallels between aizawa and shinsou are definitely hinted at in the main story, like when midoriya underestimate’s his prowess in combat at usj, but with the vigilantes arc everything is so much clearer. in the main manga, we get a direct reference of aizawa’s expulsion rate in relation to how it helps students grow when they face “’death’” as he’s interrogating kurogiri. though dramatic, i feel like it has to be linked to the dire situation aizawa faced when the pro heros and shirakumo got knocked out during that one fight because of its placement in the chapter. he understands better than most in the story that a lot of times pushes, whether big or small, are needed to grow. he wants to be to his students what shirakumo was to him.

OK EDIT because i didn’t realize there was more to the arc after 64 lol. so obviously after shirakumo dies aizawa’s and hizaishi’s dreams of starting a triple hero agency have been dashed. aizawa seems to distance himself from hizaishi, or at least they’re on uneasy speaking terms. he’s coping by training super hard and is bent on going solo after graduation, the opposite of what they had all planned. but this time, he has conviction on what he’s going to do with himself, and that’s great! he learns that you have to be there for yourself in life. there’s a small montage leading from graduation to where is now in vigilantes and it’s been hard, but he’s been making it. still a lone wolf as ever, aside from the pushes from kayama to become teachers with her and hizaishi at ua. he thinks doing that would be a stupid choice for him, he’s been alone this whole time and doesn’t work well with others (anymore, he thinks). but now that he’s in the cafe with everyone, he changes seeing everyone fawn over the cat but their new dreams of being a popular cat cafe. 

the impact of seeing their newfound hope brings him back to another flashback of the rooftop trio, and THE PARALLELS!!! of them also dreaming to start their hero agency based on their first rescue of sushi the cat. back in the present, aizawa, who’s been spacing off, suddenly realizes the sky and his mind have cleared (THE CLOUDS KEEP COMING BACK AS A METAPHOR!!! if this happens in the main story i’ll cry). i’m still not 100% sure of what exactly makes the dots connect for him, but it’s been hinted through the flashbacks and his reactions to the rescued cat that he’s actually a good teacher himself, though he had been mainly shown to have learned from others around him. he drilled husbandry requirements into shirakumo and interrogated koichi about responsibility as if they were second nature. i think aizawa realized that he’s actually always had a soft spot for watching people grow and do good things and wants to be a part of facilitating that. or at least because he wasn’t able to accomplish doing good with his friends originally, he wants to help other accomplish the goal he couldn’t. also the fact that kayama still sends him updates on sushi isn’t just really nice of her, but it’s also another representation of how aizawa’s convictions he developed as a student still drive him to do what he does today.

MY MAIN POINT IS: aizawa really loves shirakumo. to have so much of his character based in the lessons he purposefully or inadvertently taught him is an amazing testament to that appreciation. aizawa never emotes except for the occasional creepy smile when he psychologically toys with 1a, but the emotion he displayed during the interrogation really caught me by surprise. the apathetic emo character suddenly being truly happy or sad is a cliche but this panel right fucking here was so powerful to me:

yeah his eyes are always bloodshot as a trademark to his quirk, but the emotional EXHAUSTION written on his face is so starkly different than his usual boredom. this feeling that horikoshi illustrates in two small panels is so human that it’s instantly recognizable deep in our hearts. we’ve all been in those heavy and direly serious moments that wrack our mental and emotional fortitudes, where the only response manageable without hideously breaking down is some subtle motion of the hand or crinkle of the face. we all know what this means without understanding the japanese onomatopoeia or needing additional dialogue. before i read vigilantes, i still immediately understood what this man meant to aizawa. and that’s why i love shirakumo so much!! we all know at least a little how aizawa used to feel as a student, and to have someone constantly pushing you and acting as such a light in your moments of darkness is something so incredibly special. i really hope they’re able to get him out of his nomu state so those three can finally become heros together :’)

god!!!!!!!!!!

[cultofbeatles]

Hey, sweetie! I really enjoy your blog even tho I'm not super into The Beatles, but you made me wanna start listening to them! So I was wondering, if you want to obviously, if you could give some recomendations as to where to start listening to them? Cause they've got a lot of albums, and it's kind of hard to get into them at first. Anyways, thanks for your help! Sendinh you love! 🌻

welcome to the beatles! yaaayyyyy! honestly i have no clue how to go about this. it kind of depends on what vibe you want to get into. 1963-165 was more of the bubblegum pop/upbeat beatles era. lots of their songs were simple, and just something to vibe to. so if you like happy songs/songs with no real meaning behind them then that’s a good first stop. 1966-1970 is when they got more experimental and depressed lmao. that’s where more of their “grown up” sounding music comes from. (though yellow submarine counts in this time period so you know...take it with a grain of salt.) 

i’ll just recommend some of my favorites from each album!

singles: she loves you, this boy, from me to you, lady madonna, hey jude, revolution, don't let me down, daytripper

covers: long tall sally, please mister postman, roll over beethoven 

please please me (this album is kind of bluesy? country? somewhere in between. theres a lot of harmonica in it lol): i saw her standing there, anna (go to him), chains, a taste of honey, do you want to know a secret 

with the beatles (this album is a bit softer than the first one but idk it gives me blues vibes still): till there was you, all my loving, hold me tight

a hard days night (this is the album that is a good start for the beatles imo. its kind of poppy): the whole album is a bop, if i fell, i'm happy just to dance with you, can't buy me love, things we said today

beatles for sale (this is a filler album. i swear it’s my least favorite lmao. still has a similar sound to the previous album): no reply, mr moonlight, eight days a week 

help! (eh): help!, i need you, you've got to hide your love away, dizzy miss lizzy, you're going to lose that girl, ticket to ride 

rubber soul (superior. beautiful. this is the transition album along with revolver): norwegian wood, nowhere man, IN MY LIFE, michelle, drive my car 

revolver: here there and everywhere, and your bird can sing, for no one, tomorrow never knows 

sgt. peppers lonely hearts club band (big orchestra shit. this is the most flamboyant beatles album): lucy in the sky with diamonds, when i'm sixty four, a day in the life 

magical mystery tour: the whole album tbh. it’s not a long album haha. i love it. 

white album (this album is good but it’s cursed. putting it on shuffle is a deadly game. its got a bit of everything on it): dear prudence, while my guitar gently weeps, blackbird, julia, rocky raccoon, helter skelter, i will 

yellow submarine (this is a weird album bc the movie has a lot of old songs in it that aren't on the album. and most of the album is musical arrangements): all together now, hey bulldog, all you need is love

abbey road (time for the homies to cry): something, maxwells silver hammer, oh! darling, because, here comes the sun, sun king, golden slumbers, carry that weight, the end 

let it be: two of us, across the universe, the long and winding road 

i hope this is a good list to start you off with! happy listening :) 

[spacefaegoddess]

The Lightning Thief - Cut Tracks

Listen up.

Camp Half Blood

- okay let me preface this by saying that for some reason this song won’t download so I’m going off the itunes preview

- but wow this song screams Camp Half Blood

- starts with something about how you know you’re at camp if there’s fire or a flood like big mood guys

- “Camp Half-Blood, where only half of us survive! Camp Half-Blood, be glad you’re still alive!” GUYS THIS IS TOO REAL

- it reminds me of that one post comparing CHB and CJ like “yeah you can go to college and live in New Rome at Camp Jupiter so its pretty nice” “WELCOME TO CAMP HALF BLOOD, YOULL DIE WITHIN THE MONTH”

- “this is why no one watches the orientation film” Mr. D never change please, also if that’s a new kid’s orientation to CHB then maybe Mr. D is saving them from intense trauma

Pick a Side 

- I think there was a video of this somewhere, maybe from that live concert where they performed all the song from the show, but man I’m so happy they put this into a final form

- Luke: “we don’t know who stole the bolt” oh sweet baby liar

- Clarisse being ready to fight everyone is fantastic

- “Percy couldn’t find his way out of a paper bag” man I love it when they put book references in there, and even though I’m pretty sure Reyna says it I still love that it’s Clarisse’s line

-”Can’t we just pick flowers and make friendship bracelets” oh Silena no

- Silena: “My mom doesn’t believe in war” Clarisse: “oh yeah? then why does she keep texting my dad?” Luke: “WHOA” this is the content I signed up for

- Luke saying that he hopes Percy completes his quest so that the demigods don’t have to fight a war like.... idk how to feel about this. Is he lying? Does he actually hope that his friends won’t have to fight? Man

- Also Luke telling Silena that they don’t have to fight the gods’ battles like that’s Luke’s entire motivation in one line

- Clarisse and Silena belting “we gotta know just where your loyalties lie” while Luke sings “we don’t have to choose”. I know that the girls are singing it at each other but the fact that Luke is between them and he’s the one who isn’t loyal to the gods or to camp is magnificent. And again Luke saying they don’t have to choose the gods because he’s already chosen against them

- “prissy Percy’s gonna lost his Poseidon adventure!” CLARISSE GIRL

- “well whoever says love is worthless, I’ll pulverize them!” wow Clarisse is already rubbing off on Silena

-I want to know what Luke sings after “It’s their fight” while Clarisse and Silena sing “We’ll make our parents proud, make our voices loud” cause this is a really great moment for Luke’s motives to shine through

- Luke silently singing “I would never help my father” in the background

- All three singing “We’ve got a choice to make, can’t run and hide - you better pick a side” at the same time yet it means something different for all of them. Also it’s Luke finally choosing his side cause I think that’s the first time he sings “pick a side” in the song

- And that harmony at the end? DAM

Try

- okay so like way before the musical was even a thing, there was a video of this song being sung by three people who aren’t in the show, but god it was heartrenching. It’s a little different from the finished product but like Pick a Side, I’m so glad they included this song because it’s so powerful

- the song beginning and ending the same way UGH I LOVE CALLBACKS

- Percy and Annabeth both singing “I already know it, I’ll probably blow it, but I’m going there anyway” THESE KIDS ARE SO STRONG

- this song is so great because as a whole, the musical is kinda upbeat and generally happy except for like Tree on the Hill and kinda Good Kid, but this one shows the main three’s insecurities about the whole adventure. It throws your mind in a whole different direction

- “I may fail you, but it doesn’t mean that I won’t try” I mean come on

- They’re kids. They’re lost and scared and don’t really know what they’re doing, yet they keep pressing on because of each other. They feel like they will fail, but they can all look each other in the eye and say “you know what? at least we have each other and that’s worth it enough for me”

- that small part in the beginning with Percy and Annabeth singing together makes me want a Percabeth duet so bad

- Grover singing “wash my hands of past mistakes” this boy just wants to prove himself so much and Tree on the Hill give me so many feels and just UGH GROVER I LOVE YOU

- Annabeth going from “prove to the gods that I belong” to “I won’t be rejected” is freaking GROWTH

- “He must be protected” GROVER PLEASE

- That three part harmony tho

- “Fight til we’re all in the clear, look my fear in the eye!” do I need to repeat that these kids are so amazingly strong? Because they are

- “The weight of the world’s on my shoulders, like Atlas it’s crushing me down” sick Greek mythology reference bro

- Also during that live concert video I mentioned earlier, they play a cut Annabeth song (which is sadly not here) but it had the Atlas motif too and ugh it gives me all the feels

- okay so the line “we’re not brave, we’re not strong, we’re not soldiers” is a whole thing in itself but it goes so well with the next line

- I wish they had kept the next line the same as the original because it was “but my heart is a drum, and damn does it pound” but now its “my heart’s just a drum and damn does it pound”. I feel like the first one just has something more. Like I might not be brave or strong but I have the heart to get through this

- also in that original video, after the previous thing, Percy sings “I may fail you, I may fail you. If I fail, this will be our last goodbye.” WHY DIDNT THEY KEEP THAT

- “I’m not leaving your side til we find what matters” Annabeth MY GIRL

- “I’m not leaving your side til we’re back home” GROVER

- “I’m not leaving your side til you’re remembered” PERCABETH SHIPPERS HOW WE FEELING TONIGHT

- This trio man. Nothing will ever compare to them

- The fact that the lyrics change from “I may fail you” to “I can’t fail you”

- That last line where they all sing part of the number because they’re in this together now and you literally cannot separate them

- this song is the best and you can fight me on that

In the Same Boat

- or as I like to call it “Grover deals with Percabeth fighting like second graders for five minutes and forty nine seconds”

- this entire song is just a roast fest and Grover suffering

- “wow maybe your mom should’ve totally chilled instead of making monsters that get us all killed” Percy you savage

- Grover’s happy little “ask meeee” he’s so cute

- “I’d like to wrap my hands around that half-blood’s throat” wow guys

- “I don’t need to heed a talking goat” WOW GUYS

- Grover’s goat noises throughout the song

- “why run from monsters when we can rideeee” Grover baby I love you

- the lyrics change depending on what vehicle they’re in

- “with Anna-BLEH” “and Seaweed Brain” guys just kiss already

- Annabeth insulting Percy about his Rocky Mountains comment and Grover just going “wow that is soooo beautiful” 

- this song is just the original “Drive” and I’m not complaining

- Percy and Grover both yelling “SWEET” while Annabeth suffers

- Percy telling Annabeth she can hike instead of ride the motorcycle

- Percy’s sass when he says “oh, I’m sure that’s irrelevant” gods Chris McCarrell is the Percy we always wanted

- “Athena give me strength so I don’t kill him” Annabeth honey, if anything your mom is gonna strike him down for you

- ANNABETH HAVING HER OWN “DREAM”

- “it’s messed up, but he’s kinda cute” Annabeth you have no idea how relatable you truly are

- “And my head is always stronger than my heart” awwwwwww

- “If only he would say something that was remotely smart” when I tell you I cackled for like five mintues its the truth

- Followed immediately by Percy saying “I got it! The map was upside down” and Annabeth just screaming IS A WHOLE BIG MOOD

- When did Charon turn from a disco diva into a 60 year old smoker

- Annabeth calling Percy sexist like yeah girl call him out

- “They’ll kill each other, or they’ll kiss” likely both, Grover

- “If we’re lucky they’ll end up in an abyss” GROVER NO

- that Mark of Athena reference caught me so off guard, my jaw hit the floor

- Grover happily singing over a Percabeth shouting match

- also I wish I could clearly hear what those two are saying

- idk what’s so funny about Percy saying “perspective” in a awe-filled voice but it killed me

- Grover yelling at them to sing the song because reconciliation

- uhhh Jorrel’s voice??? he makes such a great Grover let me tell you

The Wittlest Minotaur

- this was also in that concert they did

- Kristin Stokes is a gift to this world, that is all

[blooming5th]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

My muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless /

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO.

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO.

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

How strictly do you follow canon?  — Pretty strictly, I think? I mean... I do always try my best to stick to canon events because although I am a big fan of AUs, I absolutely suck at writing canon-divergent characters. I also look out for possible dialectisms that come from Hinamori & put some work towards Hinamori’s personal development; all of this according to whatever has happened to her in canon / is shown by her in canon.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.  —  There’s an entire world waiting beyond Hinamori’s pretty face? She’s still pretty much just a baby when in comparison to many other Lieutenants (being the second youngest, right after lil Yachiru), which makes her super innocent and funny. She’s also very upbeat, easy-going, and friendly! She’s such a devoted Lieutenant and honestly a great worker? Super strong with her kido spells, too! A great student?! A very, very good girl, honestly! She’s the greatest person you will ever meet, I swear to GOD !!

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).  —  Most of the people, from what I can perceive from reading different opinions and have read through my years in Bleach forums and such, is that she’s pretty mentally weak. Hinamori seems to be extremely unbalanced and the previously mentioned devotion actually becomes... a weakness? Although I don’t agree with it ( mostly because I do believe her devotion towards Aizen was induced and not... something natural ), I can understand what people mean by this. Also, she mostly uses magic spells and keeps herself at a certain distance when in combat;; which people might easily perceive as her being weak when it’s just... her fighting style and body stature.

What inspired you to rp your muse?  —  I have roleplayed Hinamori for over 6 years now? almost 7, actually. I made this blog in 2014, however, I was supposed to be writing Hitsugaya. I ended up changing my entire blog’s aesthetics, not even a week later, to match Hinamori and decided to try her out. Why? Well... long story short... the fandom was full of Hitsugaya blogs. asjhdfasjdhfg I didn’t want simply be just one more in the ocean of amazing Hitsugaya writers;; so I decided to write someone who gave me access to heavy development ( because there was so little content back then ) and fun times ! lil peach was the obvious answer!

What keeps your inspiration going?  —  Most of the time its music? Whenever I decide to focus on an rp blog, I create a go-to playlist that helps me channel the muse’s traits and helps me write with more ease! That... and re-reading manga pages that might make me come up with headcanons, which I, later, always tend to apply to threads. Oh yeah, uh... LMAO! How could I forget? Talking to friends and discussing things with them, also often lets my creativity soar and helps me channel my muse’s persona. uwu

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO.

Do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO. 

Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO. 

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day?  YES / NO.

Are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO.

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO.

Are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO.

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?  —  Honestly, yes? I am a person that needs to receive constant criticism & is very open about it, too. I often find myself asking for criticism & find myself craving for bigger improvement.

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?  —  HELLS TO THE YES !! But then again... who doesn’t? It makes me so so happy whenever I receive a question or a simple message that might help me develop Hinamori’s character traits or behaviours? I love my girl so much;; knowing that others want me to gush about her amazingness & make her grow even more is nothing but an honour to me, tbh.

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?  —  Well... yeah? But not in a bad way, of course! I absolutely love discussing headcanons and getting different points of view from things ( such as headcanons, in this specific topic ) so I can center myself and find a clearer way to analyze things! Discussing headcanons is dope, man!

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?  —  This is going to be a pretty short response cause ;; I don’t care? I’m not here to really... please others. I’m here to have fun for my own self and to enjoy writing with other amazing fellas. Ain’t nobody gonna rain on my parade with unnecessary negativity;;

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  —  I haven’t ever seen many people hate Hinamori’s character? However, I do have seen quite the few people disregard her as the important character she is, or reduce her to a level that doesn’t... entirely fit the reason why she was created. Still, it’s none of my business. I don’t let it get to me or feel... the need to do anything about it? Or even talk about it? I can’t really change people’s views, so I often would just rather love my baby peach and let others do as they please.

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  —  ABSOLUTELY? It’s even part of my rules like ;; please tell me if you ever find a grammatical error ANYWHERE in my blog. English isn’t my mother tongue and thus it can be very difficult for me to keep up with fancy writing while also sticking to correct grammar? idk if this makes sense but... yknow.

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?   —  I do think I am very easy going kind of fella? Sometimes it takes me forever go get to messages ( both through discord & IMS ), but I think that’s because lately I’ve been feeling super emotionally drained ;; I haven’t been out of my goddamn house for three months and I sincerely miss seeing faces that aren’t my parents. I did take a drive the other day but... sobs... it left such a bittersweet taste. ANYWAY !! Yes. I’m very easy going and talkative. Also a big, big enthusiastic? And positivist! I am someone who always prefers to stick to the bright side of life and ignore anything that might be the least problematic so yeah ~ I am uwu. Come meet me. I’m cool. I swear.

That’s about it, congrats for filling out!

Tagged by: @hirako5hinji​   ( aka the greatest taichō ever. uwu go to bed harder next time, Anna. ♡ ) Tagging: ANYONE WHO WANTS TO DO IT !! just steal it from me. be gay. do crimes.

[phonaesthemes]

a list of asks

@padawanyugi tagged me in this, but Tumblr decided to eat any notification that I got tagged, so I’m glad I saw it on my dash because I like filling these things out. Thanks for tagging me! I may have typed A Lot.

Favorites: What types of books do you enjoy? Tell about what you’ve read recently (Or maybe about a book you hated recently!)I like spec-fic and sci-fi, although less “hard” science fiction, and I also enjoy fantasy. I read a lot of YA even though I’m in my 30s just because it seems easy to find a story I want to read and I’m not usually in the mood for dense prose.

I’ve been rereading the Wheel of Time series since it’s getting an Amazon TV show; it was my first non-LOTR fantasy series and I love it to death, warts and all, although I love joking about the weak points with other people who’ve read it. I think the last other thing I read was A Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue, which was a queer YA historical fiction, and it was a lot of fun. I wish I’d had access to all these queer stories when I was an actual teenager, but better late than never.

What types of music do you like to listen to? Share five songs from your music library. I really do like a bit of everything, although I gravitate towards certain genres more often depending on the season or time of day, so I’m going to cheat and pick 5 per season. Summer for me is lots of peppy pop (pride playlists!), punk and rock and punk-adjacent stuff, just upbeat stuff in general. -Weekender, by The Royal They -Break My Heart, by Dua Lipa -Toutes les femmes savent danser, by Loud -Ruby Soho, by Rancid -Womanarchist, by Bad Cop, Bad Cop

In the fall, my inner goth kid craves darkwave, goth rock, dramatic folk, roots rock, and also anything that reminds me of Halloween. -Iuka, by the Secret Sisters -Bela Lugosi’s Dead, by Bauhaus -How’s It Gonna End, by Tom Waits -Under the Milky Way, by The Church -I Put a Spell on You, by Screamin’ Jay Hawkins I could go on about the Christmas music I like at length (Boney M’s Christmas album slaps, ngl) but I’ll just skip that and say that I listen to more classical and piano pieces in the winter. I’m terrible at remembering names, so artists only: -Ludovico Einaudi -Chopin -Debussy -Saint-Saëns -Dvořák And in spring I’m usually just depressed af and listen to whatever. -FML, by K.Flay -Weird Part of the Night, by Louis Cole -Juodaan Viinaa, by Korpiklaani -P.O.H.U.I., by Carla’s Dreams -Marryuna, by Baker Boy

Do you have a show or movie that you can just put on anytime and it’s your comfort? Definitely Star Trek. I’ve rewatched the various iterations (except TOS) so many times. Also Mean Girls and Bring It On, idk why.

Do you have a favorite dessert? Tiramisu or creme brulée! Or macarons. I don’t eat dessert really unless I’m at a restaurant.

Do you have a favorite cold drink? Sparkling water, hands down.

Do you have a favorite game? The hours I have put into the SIms in my lifetime is probably shameful, although I haven’t played in a while. Don’t Starve is another contender for hours played, but I am also really fond everything by Amanita Design

Do you have a favorite part of your self care/beauty/health routine? I haven’t been doing it much lately since I’ve been dealing with some uncertain health issues with my joints (actually have a rheumatologist appointment later today), but savasana after a long yoga workout is borderline ecstasy.

Do you have a favorite type of take-out food? Indian for sure.

What’s your favorite type of exercise/physical activity? I have a love-hate relationship with running. I don’t actually love it but I love how I feel after. I really enjoy yoga. I love playing in the water at the beach, bodyboarding and swimming.

Pick between: (you choose the context)

Cook or bake? (I love cooking A Lot)

Space or ocean? (Hard to pick, but I grew up by the ocean and it’s 100% my happy place)

Chocolate or vanilla?

City or suburb or rural? (I grew up in an isolated rural village and I miss the quiet and the slower pace of life, but I do not miss the lack of amenities and opportunities, or the smalltown gossip. I also don’t drive bc of epilepsy, so I’m fucked as far as transport in rural settings.)

Past or future?

Shower in the morning or evening?

Mac/Apple or PC/Android? (Linux in general!)

Sing or dance?  (I don’t have an amazing voice but I can carry a tune without it being painful, and I love singing along with songs.)

Get up early or sleep in? (I actually love sleeping in but with two kids, early morning is my only time to myself, so I wake up before 6 most days AGGH.)

Shoes, socks, or bare feet? (Hate socks. I’m barefoot at home all year round.)

Marker, crayon, or pencil? Pen!

Tea, coffee, or hot chocolate? (Coffee in the morning, tea later on.)

Random questions:

Have you ever had any pets? (Had dogs and a cat as a kid, and as an adult I’ve had betta fish and cats, and I have a cat currently.)

What is your academic background/job field? I did my undergrad in linguistics, and I am currently a stay-at-home dad lol. I do freelance editing and transcription on the side. I don’t think I’ll ever work in my field bc I really don’t have the energy to go to grad school.

What’s something random that you’re into (even if you aren’t good at it)? I signed up for a Cape Breton step dancing class in university and I loved it.

Are you good at putting away your clean laundry right away? It depends on the day, but generally yes. Mine and everyone else’s. When I lived alone? Absolutely not.

What’s one of your pet peeves? Someone trying to have a conversation with me when they have the radio or TV on. I can’t follow what you’re saying if someone else is speaking! I hate having that stuff on as background noise in general.

What’s something you’re pretty good at? I’m a great cook.

What’s the most recent nice thing you bought for yourself? A new conditioner ig? lol

Can you sew? I can mend a small tear or sew on a button, but it’s been years since I did more than that.

What’s a chore you hate (or a chore you enjoy)? I hate vacuuming so much. So much. Maybe if I had a better vaccuum cleaner I wouldn’t mind it, but I just feel like I’m fighting with the stupid thing, getting caught up on its own cords, caught on furniture, can’t quiiiite reach a spot... HATE IT. I like shoveling snow sometimes, though.

Tell us a fun fact about yourself. I am 20 years older than my youngest sibling, and five minutes younger than my “oldest” sibling.

Never have I ever... Gone fishing, even though I’m from a fishing community.

What extracurriculars did/do you do in school? In high school, I played trumpet in band until the band got dissolved from lack of funding. I played soccer one year, was in a play another year. We had an art club for like a semester that I was in. In university the first time round, I did step dancing and intramural hide and seek  Second time around, I was in the linguistics club to help with assignments. (We were very much encouraged to work in pairs or groups for a lot of different classes. The only thing was that you did need to list your group members on the assignment so the prof knew who you worked with. My first morphology class in particular, we had a whole homework club where a huge portion of the class got together to work through assignments and help each other understand, and the prof would quite often show up. </tangent>

Deeper questions:

How’s your quarantine/last few months been? The cabin fever was really bad before the weather warmed up. I struggle with seasonal depression every spring, and it’s gotten much worse since we moved to Edmonton because of how long the winters are. (Snow from September to May/June? Fucccck.) It’s frankly horrifying to look at what’s going on in the US, but even though we have far fewer cases here, I’m really anxious that we’ll see another wave soon. Otherwise, I think I’ve adjusted. Home-schooling, hand-sanitizing, social distancing, masks...All feels kind of normal now, which should maybe concern me.

What do you think of human nature/society/etc.? I am like the least philosophical person you will meet so I don’t think I really have many thoughts.

What’s something you are insecure about? Writing my L2 if a native speaker is gonna read it.

What do you think is the meaning of life/reason that humans exist in the universe? I don’t think there is one, and that doesn’t bother me.

Do you think you’re better (whatever that means to you) than you used to be? Definitely. My adolescence and early adulthood was rough. I was dealing with a lot of trauma, untreated bipolar disorder, and I self-harmed for a very long time. I could not imagine making it to 30, let alone being stable and happy. I actively avoided thinking about the future because it made me spiral. But I was lucky enough to get help, consistent help from a doctor I clicked with, and it made a world of difference. I think younger me would be disappointed at how mundane my life is, but I’m thrilled to be boring because boring means no life-upending mood episodes. I have a happy partnership and two delightful kids and I couldn’t ask for more.

What are your thoughts on religion? I’m not religious and my own experience being raised in the Catholic church was frankly traumatic, but I know that it’s a source of comfort and community for many others and I think that’s awesome for them.

Do you think that there are aliens out there? I think so, although I think that we may not even know what other kinds of life to look for and may not recognize it even if we find it.

What’s something that’s been on your mind recently? We’re moving cross-country in less than a month (driving, no less, nearly 5000 km) and I still have so much to do to get ready aosjdoajdoasijdoaijsd

[courtneystapleton]

Can you rank the songs from six? Favorite to least favorite?

ohhhh ok. They’re all Bops and I love all of them for their own reasons (the only one I’m not crazy about is HoS, but it just doesn’t speak to me the way the others do)

9. Heart of Stone- I’m not into the tempo of it at all, it’s pretty much the only one I ever skip- I don’t relate to it, and I have difficulty trying to put myself in her place. It’s just not a song for me. But the talent that goes into it??? Like vocally it’s such a good song!!

8. Ex-Wives- It’s the introductory song, it’s fun, it plays on the prejudices people already have and how they’re going to break them. The puns (tonight we’re gonna do ourselves justice cause we’re taking you to court). Least favourite group song, but still an absolute banger.

7. Haus of Holbein- So much fun and I love it. Took me some time to grow into, but now??? love it

6. I Don’t Need Your Love- beautifully sung by literally every member of the cast that I’ve heard. Brings me to tears. It’s??? such a good song. And every single Parr and alt Parr does it so well. It’s beautiful. It was so much more than I expected from a song about/”by” Catherine Parr.

5. Get Down- that’s the song of a badass bitch and I love it. this is basically just Anna going “if hviii wanted to divorce me, i’d just let him. rip to catherine of aragon but im different.” and just??? the comparisons between time periods and “I didn’t look like my profile picture” line really just??? hits me. how a portrait could equal catfishing because one man doesn’t think it’s a good likeness. like fuck off dude. 

4. No Way- The Attitude. The riffs. I live for it. Also her whole speech leading up to it??? unforgettable. Also her just talking about how she’s always been such a good wife and that she “kept her cool” like. also the whole verse of “you say it’s a pity cause quoting leviticus means i’ll end up kiddyless all my life” and the mention of Mary??? Catherine of Aragon is such a strong woman and I love her.

3. Don’t Lose Ur Head- I love all the different takes on it, also it was the first song that I heard from the album so it holds special memories. also i came into the fandom as someone who has studied history, specifically Anne’s Rise, Reign, and Fall, so seeing such a different take on her??? Like there’s a lot in the song where I feel Anne is playing on what people know about her??? and almost playing the audience??? idk how to explain it

2. Six- the rewriting of their stories?? coming up with their own alternate universe where they’re happy??? god i love me some aus.

1. All You Wanna Do- hiding trauma behind something upbeat and pop-y? its also the song I relate to the most. and the riffs. the emotion that goes into a live performance of it??? the way it tells a story. There’s so many layers to all of the lines.

basically each song  is amazing in it’s own way and im sorry it took me too long to answer this.

[tryingtobts]

Diet

Pairing: Kim Seokjin x m!reader ft. Best friend!Yoongi

Warning: Unhealthy eating habits, slight body shaming

A/n: Oof I’m back! Here’s the second request by @astroboy257, hope you Enjoy!

Y/n’s Pov

I quickly got ready for Jin’s and mine’s date. Putting on a simple white dress shirt and black pants, I checked my hair and smiled at myself. I grabbed my phone and waited for my boyfriend to pick me up. Notifications from Twitter popped up and I looked through them. They were pictures of Jin and I. I smiled at the sweet pictures, saving them on my phone. Albeit it is kinda creepy being stalked but we looked cute so I didn’t care. I looked through the comments and my mood dropped a bit. ‘Ugh, idk why Jin likes that pig.’ ‘Did (Y/n) gain weight or was he always that fat?’ ‘Lol look at that whale next to Jin.’ I rolled my eyes a bit. I knew they were just jealous so I tried to not let them get to me. There was a knock on my door and I stood up excitedly to open the door. Jin stood there with a smile and flowers. “I thought I could give you more than one flower so I got you a bouquet. Even if their not as pretty as my face.” He said with a air kiss. I rolled my eyes at the gesture but took the flowers and kissed him before putting the flowers in a vase. I hugged him once more before we went to his car. “Where we going Jinnie?” I asked as we pulled out of the driveway. “A restaurant that I found. Apparently it’s good for lighter meals while being delicious.” He said and gave a pointed stare at me. I rose my eyebrow, “That’s new. Usually you take us out to a nice family restaurant. But if it’s good food, it should be fine.” I hummed. He sighed a bit and I noticed the mood dropped a bit. I was confused but decided to ignore it. Once we got there, the hostess greeted us and showed us to our table. The menu didn’t look like anything we usually eat so I didn’t know what to get. “Hey Jinnie?” I asked. He hummed in acknowledgement as he concentrated on the menu. I looked at him weirdly, usually he would smile at me and give me his full attention. I tried to not let his unusual response bother me and asked, “What are you getting? I don’t know what to get.” He looked up from his menu and suggested, “I’m thinking of pasta but I think you should get a salad.” I narrowed my eyes at him, “What are you implying Seokjin?” He shook his head and turned his head back to the menu. I tightened my grip on the menu and looked down at my body. Were those comments right? No, Jin is just in a bad mood. The waiter came with bread and took our orders, I ordered a chicken salad and Jin ordered pasta. After the waiter left, a silence enveloped us and I fidgeted under Jin’s gaze as I took a piece of bread. Being slightly fed up I asked, “What? What’s wrong?” He sighed, “Well, I’ve been meaning to tell you something but it can wait till later.” I gulped and nodded. There was no fun banter, no conversation, just an awkward silence. The waiter finally came with our food and we ate in silence. I took another piece of bread and ate it with my salad. Jin sighed at my actions and I tried to not let it affect me but couldn’t so I put my fork down. “Did I do something wrong?” I asked quietly. He shook his head and looked off to the side, “I guess I should tell you now since you’re obviously not getting my hints. But don’t you think you should start dieting?” I looked at him in disbelief, “Excuse me?” “I mean it’s just kind of, I said kind of but not really, embarrassing to be seen with you sometimes especially when you eat a lot.” He said cautiously. My hand immediately went to my stomach and I looked down. Suddenly, my appetite went away and I pushed my salad away. “Fine, whatever. I-If you think that’s what’s best. Fine.” I said quietly but turning my head away so he didn’t see my eyes tearing up. He gave a noise of happiness and proceeded to eat while telling me about his day. He didn’t even notice how I kept a grip on my stomach or hear its grumbling. I kept quiet for the rest of the date but Jin didn’t notice. “Bye babe! Love you!” He said and gave me a kiss before leaving my apartment. I sighed and walked to the bathroom. I looked at my reflection in disgust, so I guess this is what the world sees. A pig. Maybe a diet won’t hurt.

3rd person PoV.

It’s been a week since the date and no one had seen (Y/n). Jin, busy with his schedule, didn’t notice since not seeing (Y/n) for this long is part of the idol lifestyle. He didn’t really notice the younger’s absence until (Y/n)’s best friend, Yoongi asked about him.

“Jin-hyung, has (Y/n) contacted you recently? He’s been ignoring my texts and the maknaes have been bothering me about him since they have no one to annoy.” Yoongi asked with concern bleeding through his words even though he tried to sound annoyed.

Jin thought about it and shook his head, “No, now that I think about it. Hold on, let me try texting him real quick.”

Jin looked confused at his phone. (Y/n) always accepts an invitation to dinner. His texts seemed very different than his usual happy and upbeat texts. No heart emojis or even a I love you.

“Well?” Yoongi asked interrupting Jin’s thoughts.

“Uh he responded. But something feels wrong. He rejected my offer for dinner.” Jin answered, sounding unsure.

Yoongi’s eyebrows furrowed and mumbled something about visiting him later before leaving his hyung to contemplate his boyfriend’s unusual behavior. Jin shook his head, maybe he’s over thinking about it.

-Timeskip-

Yoongi knocked on the apartment’s door in quick urgency. Something felt wrong, his friend hasn’t even sent a single text to him this week whether to just talk or fanboy over Jin. The door opened to reveal a pale (Y/n). The weak man leaned on the door and smiled at his best friend.

He greeted Yoongi with a small hug, “Hey Yoongi! Wasn’t expecting a surprise visit-“

“You look like shit.” Yoongi replied bluntly and hugged back noticing a slight difference in his friend’s body.

“Wow, geez you haven’t seen me in a week yet you’re still mean to meeee.” The (H/c)-ette laughed.

Yoongi furrowed his eyebrows, “Did you lose weight or some shit? Are you on a diet?”

(Y/n)’s eyes lit up and nodded eagerly, “Yep! It must be working if you were able to notice.” He smiled to himself.

“Anyway, what can I do for you, my lovely platonic soulmate?” (Y/n) asked letting the other in.

“You’ve been ignoring everyone. The maknaes are annoying me because they miss you. So you can start by explaining why you’ve been distant.” Yoongi said and settled on the couch.

The other chuckled and rubbed the back of his head, “Well, I’ve been busy trying to make this diet work. Also I didn’t want to embarrass you guys anymore than I have until I get skinnier.” He explained.

“What do you mean? You don’t embarrass us (Y/n). What did I say about reading those dumb comments again?” Yoongi said with slight anger that his friend is being bullied again.

(Y/n) shook his head, “I’m not reading them! I swear. Jin-hyung said that I should start dieting! So I’m just doing what he thinks is best.” (Y/n) tried to defend.

Yoongi stood up, “He told you what?” He said dangerously low.

“Look don’t get mad at him! It’s true! Look at me now! I’m getting skinnier!” (Y/n) said with slight hysteria.

“You look like you haven’t eaten in days! When was the last time you ate an actual meal?!” Yoongi yelled.

(Y/n) gulped, “Last week…” He said quietly.

Yoongi looked at his friend like he was crazy so he laughed, “Wow. So you tell me to eat proper meals and yet here you are, not even eating. That’s not dieting, hyung. That’s killing yourself.” He seethed.

(Y/n) flinched at his friend’s attitude and stuttered, “Y-Yoongi-“

Yoongi grabbed his friend’s hand and dragged him to the door.

“H-Hey! Where are we going?” (Y/n) said in a slight panic.

“We’re going to get you a whole meal, dumbass.” Yoongi said simply.

(Y/n) managed to retch his hand back when they reached the entrance.

Yoongi glared at (Y/n), “(Y/n) don’t be difficult!”

(Y/n) growled, “Leave.” He said quietly.

Yoongi’s eyes morphed into confusion, “What-“

“I said leave!” (Y/n) yelled and pushed his friend out the door, “This is why I avoided you all! You wouldn’t be supportive of me trying to actually become skinny!” He screamed

“You were perfect the way you were! You weren’t fat (Y/n)!” Yoongi yelled back, trying to get (Y/n) back.

“No no no! Stop lying! Everyone said otherwise! Jin even said otherwise so leave me alone!” (Y/n) yelled and pushed Yoongi one more time and slamming the door.

(Y/n) leaned his back on the door and slid down. Yoongi pounded on the door, yelling at his friend to open up. He gave up after an hour and yelled, “Fine! Believe whatever! But don’t say I didn’t fucking try!” And he left.

(Y/n) cried but shook his head and thought, ‘A few more pounds and I’ll show Yoongi that I’m perfectly fine.’

-Timeskip-

Jin’s Pov

I knocked on (Y/n)’s door in worry. It’s been two weeks since I saw him and a week since Yoongi came home fuming with tears in his eyes. He wouldn’t talk to me and glared every time I tried to approach him. I tried to get (Y/n) to tell me what happened but he refused to tell me anything. The fact that (Y/n) has been refusing to go out with me or any of the others has also got me worried, he usually likes to go out with me or the maknaes when I’m busy at least 5 times a week.

There was no answer, looking at my phone to check the time it was 7:00 pm. (Y/n) is usually home by now. I bit my lip in worry and reached above the door frame to get the spare (Y/n) keeps. I found it and unlocked the door.

“(Y/n)? Are you home?” I called out while taking off my shoes in a hurry.

I looked around the living room and saw nothing out of the ordinary. I checked the kitchen before moving onto his bedroom and noticed the lack of snacks on his counter that he puts out for the maknaes and himself. I shook my head thinking I was overthinking the whole situation.

Going to his bedroom, I heard shallow breaths coming from the other side. Gulping, I opened the door and saw (Y/n) on the floor passed out. I quickly ran over to him and placed his head on my lap.

I tried to shake him, “(Y/n)?! What happened?!” I fruitlessly asked.

I noticed how sharp his facial features were and how his cheeks were sunken in. He looked like a skeleton.

‘When was the last time this boy ate?!’ I thought in a panic as I scrambled to find my phone.

“Hyung?” (Y/n) groaned and weakly opened his eyes.

I quickly tried to calm down so I can comfort him, “Shh, I’m calling an ambulance so save your strength and you can explain to me why you would do this to yourself.” I soothed him as I dialed 911.

(Y/n) looked confused but also out of it so he smiled at me and asked, “Am I handsome yet hyung?”

It was my turn to look confused and I asked, “What are you talking about? You’ve always been handsome.”

Before he could answer the emergency operator picked up, “This is 911, what’s your emergency?”

“Yes I’m at (address). My boyfriend collapsed and it looks like he hasn’t been eating, p-please send an ambulance.” I said as calmly as I could but I couldn’t stop my voice from cracking.

“Alright sir an ambulance is on its way.” The operator said before I hung up.

“Hyung, why’d you call them? I’m fine and you said I’m handsome now!” (Y/n) said weakly with a small smile.

Tears made its way to my eyes, “You look like you could pass out any minute (Y/n)! What would of happened if I didn’t get here in time?! Why would you do this to yourself?” I yelled at him.

He flinched and looked at me with slight delusion, “B-But Jinnie-hyung said I needed to so I don’t embarrass everyone-.” He said quietly before his eyes drooped down and he went limp.

“H-Hey. (Y/n), sweetie, that isn’t funny. Come on, wake up.” I said and shook him.

I kept desperately shaking him until the paramedics came and got him. I watched in disbelief as they quickly put him the stretcher and carried him away from me. With shaking hands, I called Yoongi.

“What?” A cold response answered.

I whimpered, “Yoongi-ah, can you pick me up from (Y/n)’s. H-He- I- hospital.” I managed to choke out before sobbing as reality hit me.

“Shit- okay Hyung. I’ll be there, just fuck- hold on.” He said before hanging up.

I dropped my phone down and laid next to where (Y/n) was and sobbed. It felt like I cried for hours before a tap on my shoulders brought me out of my crying fit. I looked up to see Namjoon with a worried face and Yoongi looking off to the side with tears on his angry face.

“Hyung, let’s go to the hospital yeah?” Namjoon spoke softly, holding out his hand.

I nodded and let him help me up. Yoongi stared at me and I looked away. He sighed.

“It’s both of our faults so hurry up and get in the car.” He murmured before turning around and walking out.

Namjoon patted my back and walked me to his car where Yoongi sat in the passenger seat. We drove to the hospital in worried silence.

We quickly walked to the front desk and asked for (Y/n)’s room.

The nurse hummed as she looked for his name on the computer, “He was brought in a few minutes ago so only family is allowed to visit and have information.”

I resisted growling at her and with clenched teeth I said, “I’m his fiancé, they’re his brothers.”

She looked surprised, “Oh sorry sir. The doctor said Mr. (L/n) is in stable condition. He’s in room 135.” She said.

I turned towards Yoongi and Namjoon, who looked at me with unsurprised faces.

I walked passed them and whispered, “Well, I’m not going to let him wake up to no one am I? I already fail”

They sighed and followed me. We rushed to the room and as soon as we reached it I froze. I didn’t want to go in as guilt weighed down on my shoulders.

“Hyung. It’s okay.” Namjoon said and I felt two hands on my shoulders.

I looked back and saw Yoongi and Namjoon give me a reassuring nod. I gulped and reached for the door but before I could open it, the door opened and the doctor who opened it looked up from his clipboard with a slightly shocked face.

“Are you here for Mr. (L/n)?” He asked.

I nodded, “Yes. I-I’m his fiancé.” I lied.

He briefly looked at my bare hands and rose an eyebrow before shaking his head. I felt my ears heat up in embarrassment and I quickly hid my hands.

He sighed, “I’m assuming your ‘Jinnie-hyung’? Mr. (L/n) was mumbling about you in his delusional state and kept asking for us to call you as soon as he woke up, don’t worry he’s no longer delirious. Let’s talk out here first.” He said with a slight smile and closed the door behind him.

I heard chuckles behind me and I glared at Namjoon and Yoongi to shut them up. They only looked away with teasing smiles.

The doctor looked at his clipboard and stated, “Mr. (L/n) was very lucky someone called him in. He was very malnourished and is underweight. If he had went another day or so, he wouldn’t have made it.”

I gulped as tears welled up in my eyes again and I nodded my head in understanding. The doctor moved away from the door and we rushed in.

I wanted to throw up at the IV hooked up to him to give him all the nutrients that he needed. (Y/n) was staring outside the window and looked at us as we walked in. He gave a weak smile. I walked up to him, grabbed his bony hand and started to sob.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” I started to apologize.

He looked confused and gave a small smile.  “Why are you apologizing? It was all my fault in the first place for being fa-” He explained before Yoongi interrupted him.

“You weren’t fat to begin with, damn it! All those comments about your weight were wrong! Jin-hyung was wrong!” He yelled.

I looked at him shocked before realization hit me. I wanted to punch myself in the face. This was all my fault.

“Yoongi-“ (Y/n) said.

I interrupted him, “He’s right. I’m an asshole. I-I didn’t want this to happen! I wasn’t thinking when I said that. The comments were getting to me too and the stress of that day- God I don’t deserve to even see you right now if I’m making dumb excuses.” I said and scrambled to get away from (Y/n).

But (Y/n)’s grip on my hand tightened and he looked at me with hints of sadness and shock, “Jin-hyung. It’s okay.” He tried to sooth me.

“No! You could’ve died! It’s my fault! I almost killed you.” I cried out.

He let out a broken chuckle, “Jin-hyung. It’s my fault for being me-“ (Y/n) said again but this time his voice cracked a bit.

I cut him off with a hug, minding his IV, “No. You’re perfect the way you are. I love you for you, it’s why I asked you out in the first place so don’t say shit like that anymore. I should have told you this and not that bullshit on that date.” I said calmly.

He gripped my shirt and softly cried before full out sobbing. I cried with him and comforted him. (Y/n) pulled away and looked at Yoongi, who was sniffling quietly with his back turned away from us.

(Y/n) chuckled and called out, “You can come over here too, you big baby.”

Yoongi turned around angrily and I saw the tears in his eyes, “You’re the one crying!” He defended himself as the tears slowly made its way out.

Yet he still walked over, and hit (Y/n) on the head before softly crying in his lap.

“I’m sorry I left you even when I knew you needed help. I could’ve done more.” He whispered.

(Y/n) shook his head and patted Yoongi’s head. “No, it’s alright. I wasn’t in a right state of mind and would’ve just pushed you farther away. I should say sorry for being a bitch to you.” He comforted him.

Yoongi chuckled, “Good.” He looked at me, “If this happens again, I’ll kill you.” Yoongi gave a small smile and left with Namjoon.

I looked back at (Y/n) and smiled, “I’m sorry. When we get you out of here, I’ll treat you to any food you want then make a statement about those hate comments okay?”

(Y/n) smiled brightly and nodded, “Anything? Even dessert?”

I giggled, “Yep. Because I love you.”

He kissed me on the lips softly, “I love you too.”

I held on to his hand a little tighter and kissed him again. It was perfect, just like him.

[blogaboutmusic]

all the playlists !

did this a while ago, but my spotify changed so much that i decided to do it again, and also because i have a lot of new followers! thank you & thank you if you follow my playlists! Be sure to check the list out bc i have a playlist for almost every genre & mood!

● ✧･ﾟ*✧･ﾟ* existential crisis:  everything i have that is sad ● 2019 ; letz getit: music i discovered so far in 2019 / music that is important to me in 2019 ● 20(18)GAYTEEN: every album that came out in 2018 (at least of artists i like) ● 20(19)BITEEN: every album that came out in 2019 (/artist i like :) ) ● 5sᴏs ; complete: i think the title says it all ● ａｌｉｅｎｓ: a mix full of alt. songs. dope. 10/10 recommend to aliens ● all of it ; alternative ?: stuff that is alt but not quite, pop punk but not quite, rock but not quite, etc! ● all of it ; emo music: EVERYTHING YOU NEED. EVERYTHING SAD. EVERYTHING ANGRY. EVERYTHING GUITAR. pop-punk punk-rock emo/rock indie/alternative ● all of it ; k-pop: all the k-pop music that I listen to, stuffed into one mix. ● ᴀʟʟ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ʟᴏᴡ ; ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ: all of all time low’s music ● angry k-pop bops: a playlist that was inspired by district 9 of stray kids ● autumn, baby: perfect songs for fall! ● back to the future: idk some albums that i love listening to that go really well together ● bandito tour ; twenty one pilots: a playlist for an upcoming concert ● b͓̽a͓̽n͓̽g͓̽ ͓̽c͓̽h͓̽a͓̽n͓̽: a playlist for my bias of stray kids! ● ʙᴀɴɢᴛᴀɴɢ sᴏɴʏᴇᴏɴᴅᴀɴ ; ʙᴛs: all of bts’ music in one playlist ● best intro's, no argue: okay but really 505 is one of the best songs ever don’t fight me on that one ● bi bops: actually it doesnt matter if you’re gay, straight, pan or bi, these all work. just bops. ● b-sides, : songs i tend to forget about because i mostly listen to other songs on the albums... but they deserve the world so there you go ● 𝖇𝖎𝖙𝖊 𝖒𝖊: kinda angry, kinda alternative. ● bon voyage: i listened to this a lot when i went to paris and when i have to travel a lot. travel worthy. ● bop that Bussy ; emo version: FAV EMO JAMS AND BOPS AND BANGERS ● bring me the horizon ; complete : all of bmth’s music ● bts amsterdam 13.10.18: SETLIST ly tour amsterdam but also europe. i miss them a lot & wanna thank them for one of my best nights ever

● calm my anxious ass: what i need when i’m breaking down & alone again ● chanyeol (っ◔◡◔)っ: a playlist for my exo bias, mostly english sung songs though ● chilly billy doobop: so nice to have as background music or for when there’s a friend over. just ever so fckn CHILL ● classical // piano: classical music, mostly piano ● current mood: songs i’m probably listening to right now (lmao still) ● daniel james howell: a playlist for my fav youtuber!!! ● daydream: my playlist with music that makes me dream for a better version of me ● ᴅᴀʏ6 ; ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ: every day6 song ever. stan talent stan day6 ● death / school mix: songs about dying & other relatable stuff for school, ha ha ● dizzy tummy: stuff i listen to strolling through the city or being in a specific trainride ● dope on a rope: no, this isn't a playlist for the growlers' song, it's old beats. ● emo & alternative: sum emo tunes! totally random *insert that one crazy emoji with the tongue out* ● energize this tired bub: upbeat tempo music that really energizes me ● energetic appleflap: playlist for a friend (that i have crush on) ● eɴᴛᴇʀᴛᴀɪɴᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴛᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴀᴛᴇʀᴘᴀʀᴋꜱ: music i  listened to before & after my waterparks concert + every waterparks song ever & the setlist ● ᴇxᴏ ; xᴏxᴏ: exo complete. please give us a ot9 comeback ● exploring: stuff i have yet to listen to ● fᴀʟʟ ᴏᴜᴛ ʙᴏʏ ; ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ: all of FOB’s music. can you believe i’m still emo trash? ● frickity freck!: fresh alt-ish music ● fuck me up: a ReAlLy gOoD aLterNaTiVe / IndiE / eMo playlist? ● funky dunky business: the bass in these is mostly really mcflipping good ● geez, morty: playlist for fake friends ● ɢᴏᴛ7 ; ᴀʜɢᴀsᴇ: all of got7 their music ● ɢʀᴇᴇɴ ᴅᴀʏ ; ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ: all of green day aka my fav band their music ! every.thing. ● grrr. : just metal and grunge. heavy shit ● guitars: really good guitars like guns ‘n roses & beatles and just guitars that i love??? ● guns  n' roses setlist: setlist g ‘n r Europe 2017 ● halsey: indie artist, all her music in a playlist ● happy vibes: music that makes me smile!! ● hoe anthems (k-pop ver.); k-pop bops that make me go wanna hoe the heck out ● homework // calm: music i listen to when i make homework ● hug me pls: acoustic songs i wanna listen to while cuddling ● i’m a mess: a good, short playlist i- lol- unironically made when i discovered Michael Clifford had a girlfriend lmao i hope theyre happy they deserve it ● i, an intellectual: a nerd: music from movies and series i really dig ● interactive introverts: music they played and i listened to before interactive introverts ● jae = bae: this one goes out to jae, guitarist and vocal legend in the band day6 ● jazzin' away: jazz, my friend. ● j-pop ; rock 'n soul: my favourite j-pop songs!! yes, that includes all one ok rock songs. ● journal writings: i attempt to keep up a journal. this gives me vibes. sometimes a bit more uptempo, but mostly a bit softer ● judith.eliza: for a friend ● jughead's tape: for jughead jones, of riverdale ● just guitars, nothing else.: just acoustic guitars of some of my fav songs, really good for while studying i think ● k-grooves: korean r&b and indie ● k-pop ; essential jams: my favourite k-pop songs, which are quite a lot! ● k-pop ; girls: all my girl groups’ music ● k-rock ; you make myday: all my favourite k-rock songs, yes that includes every day6 song because they are just that good sorry ● last young renegade tour: music i listened to before & after my all time low concert + the setlist ●  letters to you: songs that made me think of my crush. i think people can realate? ● let there be luf: some new alt, sum songs about love ● lilacskyjimin ; fav: playlist for a friend ● lone hours: in: feeling lonely? we do, too, dont worry. youre not alone. ● mama: stuff i grew up with / stuff my mother and i both like ● marina & the diamonds: apperantly she’s only called marina now? one of the best female singers i know, indie as f*ck ● ᴍᴇᴇᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇ ; 5sos:  playlist for the 5sos concert, setlist and the songs in between! ● micmicbudgee ; fav: playlist for a friend ● mom jeans, tired eyes: mostly 70s and 80s BOPS ● ᴍᴏɴsᴛᴀ x ; ᴍᴏɴʙᴇʙᴇ: all of monsta x’s music in a playlist ● muse ; complete: all of alt rock band muse their songs ● my chemical romance ; complete: emo rock band mcr all of their music ● my youngblood chronicals: alt rock songs. the reason why i’m still fighting ● nederlandse bodem: my favourite Dutch songs! ● ɴᴇᴏ ᴄᴜʟᴛᴜʀᴇ ᴛᴇᴄʜɴᴏʟᴏɢʏ ; ɴᴄᴛ: nct complete, in a playlist ● nienisneckdeep ; fav: playlist for a friend ● nights: songs i like to listen to before going to sleep ● noa.myg: fav: another playlist for a friend ● non-english bops: jewish, french, spanish, swedish, irish and celtic music like omnia (which is partly english but i think it fits here so tough luck) ● one ok rock ; complete: one ok rock is a japanese rock band that sings in english in their latest work ● ᴘᴀɴɪᴄ! ᴀᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ᴅɪsᴄᴏ ; ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ: all of panic! at the disco’s music in a playlist ● paramore ; complete: paramore was a punk rock band with a female singer, and now they make alt rock ● paris: a playlist for a city that i miss, a time that i miss ● ᴘᴇɴᴛᴀɢᴏɴ ; ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ: aka all of k-pop group Pentagon their music in a playlist ● pizza punk: waterparks, neck deep, with con and music like that. perfect for skating eheh ● power vocals: beautiful voices ! voices that make me jealous ● problems with sleeping: lovely alt songs, some of them are about not being able to sleep ● queen discography: you know that movie, bohemian rhapsody..? ● rad activist shit: end gun violence. black lives matter. abortions should be legal, pedophiles and rapists should not be able to walk free. oh and love is love, get over it. angry songs, songs about revolution. ● rainbow: love songs, some sad (rain), some ever so happy (sun). together they make a rainbow ● red hot chili peppers: the red hot chili peppers are rock band and if you dont know them, look them up!! ● revolution radio 2017: music i listened to before & after my green day concert + the setlist ● rev up my spaceship, bois: modern hard rock in a playlist! ● sad boi o’clock: another sad playlist, you can never have enough of these ● sᴀʏ ᴛʜᴇ ɴᴀᴍᴇ ; sᴇᴠᴇɴᴛᴇᴇɴ: seventeens (k-pop) complete music discography ● skylinn ; khaleesiqoyi: first playlist i made for a friend: my best friend ● slytherin headgirl: this is what the people in slytherin listen to, i swear ● socrates would deffo stan: indie and alt, only for intellectuals (i’m just kidding) ● soft; rock™: soft (old) rock ● soft; k-pop: for if you wanna weep along with exo, bts,, etc ● soundtrack of my life 🌙: the basics to my music ● space jams 🚀: most songs are about wanting to run away, perfect for when you’re in space ● spoopy rave: i secretly listen to this through the year, idec ● starry skies, snazzy beats: mostly cute beats, perfect for studying or staring at the sky ● sᴛᴀʏ ; sᴛʀᴀʏ ᴋɪᴅs !: all of stray kids songs, go stan them already and please stay ● stranger things: songs that give me a stranger things vibe ● supernatural ; rock & grunge: stuff Dean Winchester would listen to, blue oyster cult, aerosmith, black sabbath, stuff like that ● tae tae: a playlist for v of bts, one of my biases ● the 1975: an alt band, latest work: an brief inquiry into online relationships ● the neighbourhood: very chill music. kinda rap, kinda alt ● these physically turn me on: really, really good songs, or nice vocals, idk how to explain ● tits out for harambe: the closest thing i have to pop music / rap i guess, with khai dreams, frank ocean, childish gambino, ari, troye, ya know ● tokyo: a playlist for dreaming about the feeling of a city ● travel back in time: 50s, 60s music, stuff i listen to with my grandpa but also alone cuz its fun ● twenty øne piløts ; complete: all of twenty one pilots their music ● underappreciated alt songs: alternative songs that i think deserve (even more) hype! ● waterparks ; complete: nice new pop punk band that deffo has a lot of talent! ● when the week ends: a mix for the weekend ● wubbalubbadubdub: old bops that make me forget about my sadness ● year in review: 2018: music i discovered in 2018 / music that was important to me in 2018 / songs that came out in 2018 ● yoongi: songs where you can sing yoongi really clearly and songs that make me think of him ● you’re making me feel miserable: songs i listened to after i confessed to my crush and he turned me down sksksksk

please reblog, it helps my blog a lot, tysm

[the-pen-and-the-stethoscope]

my official, uninterrupted, unapologetic thoughts on the album Lover by Taylor Swift as i listen in its entirety at 6:30 am on Friday morning after working until 10 pm the night before.

Before I start I am already emotional. my hands are sweating. my heart is pounding. are those tears in my eyes or am i exhausted? idk. ok here we go...

1) fuck yes. snaps. love a song with snaps. A BEAUTIFUL BREAKUP SONG ABOUT HOW YOU JUST DONT EFING CARE ANYMORE. ahhh i love how there is like this build up and you think it’s going to be a headbanger of a chorus but then it just stops and it’s like...oh wait actually this is v calm right now i just dont care about you anymore. but also OMG SHE JUST LAUGHED ummm also I love how upbeat this is. i guess what im saying is that WANEGBT walked so I Forgot That You Existed could run. 

2) MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. this song will always bring me back to being on an airplane flying to Peru because it is literally the only song I listened for my entire trip to Peru last spring. but also from the moment it came out I was obsessed with the unapologetic happiness in the song and it’s all about YOURSELF. WAIT WTF WHERE’S THE SPELLING LINE THATS MY FAVORITE TO YELL????? TAYLOR WHERE IS IT??? WHERE IS IT??? i’ll be taking this up with my lawyers. your people will hear from my people. 

3) well i just went back to my spotify and REALIZED THAT IT WAS ON FUCKING SHUFFLE FUCK ME. OK WE ARE STARTING AGAIN. 

1) SECOND LISTEN THOUGHTS ON IFTYE: this song is just the perfect beat. i just realized that she laughs TWICE actually (maybe more??) and this is my official petition that she laughs during all live performances. thanks. 

2) OMG REP VIBES WITH THAT LOW BASE SYNTH. oh wow I love this transition much more than the one to ME! I’m glad that was on shuffle the first time. This literally could be a REP song. GETAWAY CAR THAT’S WHAT IT REMINDS ME OF! OH. MY. GOD. WELL THANKS FOR PUTTING A REP SONG ON LOVER OK IM NOT OK. did she just say “loving you aint the worst thing...you are the worst!”? Idk I will evaluate the lyrics a second (third...fourth...fifth...) time. 

3) AHHHH LOVER OMG OK LET ME JUST STARE AT MY CEILING FOR THIS ONE. “Swear to take this magnetic force of a man” is up there on favorite tswift lines. cant decide if i want this to my first dance song at my wedding OR the song that plays near the end of the reception when everyone is tired and like all the couples come up and dance and so then it’s like you get to see how many people are in love OR the song that i save for afterwards when we are alone in our hotel room. good to know i’ve got options. 

4) god damn HERE WE GO WITH SOME REP VIBES. (to clarify any deep base pulsating beat is rep vibes to me apparently) lyrics: “they’d say I played the field before I found someone to commit to” “every conquest I had made would make me more of a boss to you” “they wouldn’t shake their heads and question how much of this I deserve” “I’D BE JUST LIKE LEO” GOD THIS IS AMAZING I’M OBSESSED. “If I was a man I’d be THE MAN” 

5) OMG THE ARCHER. WAS LISTENING TO THIS LAST NIGHT AND THINKING LIKE....THIS MIGHT BE FAVORITE ONE????? I KNOW SO SO EARLY BUT SO FAR IT HOLDS UP IT’S JUST LIKE....THAT SLOW BUILD I LOVE IT. EVERY TIME I LISTEN THERE IS A DIFFERENT MEANING. AMAZING SONG TO RUN TO LIKE ON REPEAT. WHICH IS HARD TO FIND. PROBABLY HARDER TO MAKE. I STAN. 

6) THERE YA GO MISS SWIFT WITH THE SNAPS AGAIN. ohhh hmmmm someone’s horneyyyyy this song feels like a whisper...like you’re at a bar and you are like pointing out this hot guy you’ve been seeing around and you whisper to your friend ‘that’s the one’. OMG BRIDGE. WAIT WHAT OMG WAIT OMG WHAT BRIDGE BRIDGE BRIDGEEEEEE. well okay I kinda feel like a huge wind just knocked me off my feet. i’m slightly stunned. no time to process before...

7) OMG TALK ABOUT REP VIBES. This could be a beautiful music video. This is like -- i have a lot of feelings none of them have words but this song has a BLACK vibe and a DARK vibe and i’m picturing a high school shrouded in clouds at night. running through the hallways in a ripped dress. Wow wow wow. 

8) oh good some happy songs again. ahhhhhhhhh now THIS I CAN DANCE TO. AHHHHHHHHHHH I’M IN LOOVE. this is so freaking romantic. OH ANOTHER BRIDGE FROM BRIDGE CITY. Taylor like you brought it with these bridges girl. OMG THE SLOW FADE AWAY AT THE END...SOBBING.....

9) THE BEST PART ABOUT THIS IS I’M ONLY HALFWAY DONE. Oh wow is this song going to make me cry? just obsessed with how etherial this is. wow omg this is like the most complex love story ever written in a song ever. so many twists and turns i’m just sitting here asking questions!!! What happened on cornelia street that you dont want it again? why did you pack your bags? OH YAY HE GOT YOU TO COME BACK. OMG DOES EVERYONE HEAR THAT THUNDER EFFECT IN THE BACKGROUND???? omg wait omg that last line!? I will be listening to this A LOT.

10) I feel like taylor’s got a lot of happy sounding songs that are breakup songs and a lot of sad sounding songs that are actually about being in love on this album it’s so interesting!!! like this is a breakup song and wow everything about it is upbeat and pop-y. “trying to find a part of me you didn’t take up” (I FEEL THIS SO HARD WOW). love the boarded up house metaphors and like just everything else i CANT THINK FAST ENOUGH god idk why I committed to writing all my thoughts....

11) OMG SOMEONE WAS TALKING. ahhhhh she loves all these American things but she LOVES A LONDON BOY. “I GUESS ALL THE RUMORS ARE TRUE” power move!!!!! ASLDJALKDFLKJAGL;KADSLASDFLKASDFLKJ AS SOMEONE WHO LIVED IN AND FELL IN LOVE WITH THE CITY OF LONDON I’M JUST LOVING THAT THIS IS BASICALLY A LOVE SONG TO LONDON. FORGET THE BOY. ALL THESE LONDON REFERENCES ARE KILLING ME. (did she just name drop stella mccartney???? I HEARD THAT OKAY!?) 

12) DIXIE CHICKS. IT’S A COUNTRY SONG I CAN ALREADY TELL. THE STRUMMING GUITAR. I’M DYING. wait is this about her mom???? ok well i’m crying.........wow so so so so so beautiful and soft and hopeful. 

13) FIDDLEEEEEEEE oh short lived but omg that was exciting for a moment i thought we were gunna get a crazy country song. This is a good transition....the way this song starts soft and slow and doesn’t come in swinging feels appropriate after Soon You’ll Get Better. WOW. “Religion is your lips....the alter is my hips....” SEX. I’m glad this is not a country song. wow my head was in an odd place that will be weird to come back to after knowing what this song actually is about (it’s about sex)

14) YAS YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN. (it’s 7:40 am but we could have had greatnesssss) THIS SONG SERIOUSLY SLAPS. GOD I LOVE IT SO MUCH. also true story - for like the first week after it came out I SWEAR I thought there was a lyric at some point that said “you’re freaking me out” and like I still think that one of the lyrics SHOULD be that so like I know I’m not a seven time Grammy award winging singer/song writer but like taylor can we change that? can we? MY ONLY COMPLAINT ABOUT THIS SONG IS THAT IT NEEDS TO BE AT LEAST FIVE MINUTES LONGER. 

15) ahhhhhhh omg shes like learning about holding onto love and not picking fights and growing through difficulty and not blowing up. (I’ve run out of ways to say omg this is amazing and i’m obsessed). but this is like a GREAT ballad. 

16) BACK TO MEEEEEEEE I like it a lot better here phew thank god we were on shuffle before. I wanted the DJ to play this song at my friend’s wedding back in May (OMG NO MORE SPELLING LINE AHHHH) and they like wouldn’t??? so weird. I honestly think this is a self love song but also an amazing romantic love song and I think it belongs in a wedding playlist. 

17) omg so cute...little best friend love. also i love how simple this song is. no big production. we are back to basics and child hood. AHH HORNS. I thought this song was going to be like TIWWCHNT but its just purely wholesome!!! She’s serious - it’s nice to have a friend! I agree! 

18) LAST SONG AND ITS ALMOST FIVE MIN LONG MY BODY IS READY. This is just classic classic taylor swift and an amazing way to end the album. it’s like the conclusion paragraph of an essay on how she’s happy and content and in love with not just her lover but herself. the world used to be harsh, but now it’s just daylight. (another bridge city - just fyi - for those listening at home that’s where you are now) SHE IS SO HAPPY. “Step into the daylight and let it go” OMG SHES TALKING!!!!! WHERE IS THIS FROM??? IS THIS AN INTERVIEW OR IS IT NEW OMG WAIT WASN’T EXPECTING THAT ENDING WOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW

OKAY FRIENDS THAT WAS IT I HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS AND NOW I NEED TO LISTEN AGAIN AND AGAIN FOREVER AND ALWAYS. THANK YOU @taylorswift (@taylornation ) FOR TRUSTING US WITH SUCH A MAGICAL JOURNEY.