#idk if i should include their traits in these posts :

[d4isywhims]

the feng household, san myshuno.

the fengs are a force to be reckoned with. victor and lily are this close to having san myshuno wrapped around their finger and they are not wasting any more time. victor is looking to groom his son, louis, to replace him as san myshuno's top politician and be his puppet. that way, victor is still able to control san myshuno under the disguise of the younger feng heir. but louis' reckless reputation is getting in the way of victor's plan and he's not liking it. louis' twin, isabelle, has no interest in whatever her parents are involved in. she wants to make a name for herself. being one of the top students of ubrite, she'll soon be able to tick that off of her list.

victor feng || materialistic, perfectionist, genius

lily feng || unflirty, genius, hates children

isabelle feng || high-maintenance, art lover, jealous

louis feng || clubber, non-committal, lazy

[dufflebagwitch]

it's been deeply surreal to see the "curate your own experience" site become increasingly more comfortable with yucking peoples smut yums. And I mean that on both sides of the "problematic fiction" debate

[adobe-outdesign]

Nigel: The Muppets' Most Interesting Uninteresting Character

(This was supposed to be a fun little post about an obscure Muppet character but now I fell down a hole doing too much research and sunk cost fallacy won't let me live it down unless I include all of the useless information I've learned so enjoy knowing more about this character than you ever have or ever will want to know)

Nigel was created to be the host of the Muppet Show's Sex and Violence pilot instead of Kermit (who only appears in the pilot for like 30 seconds)

He was originally puppeteered by Jim Henson himself, giving him a vaguely Kermit-esq voice initially

Nigel Voice Count: 1

Nigel is a yellow... something. You’d assume he’s just a stylized human Muppet but in S4E18 Sam refers to him as a “thing”

He actually looks near-identical to a Fraggle minus the tail. I don’t know what to do with this information

Nigel was diagnosed with terminal Boring Personality disease due to the following attributes:

He’s very meek. Unlike Kermit, who will freak out and tell people they suck to their faces, Nigel raises his voice one (1) time and mostly relies on Sam the Eagle and Crazy Harry to deal with the assorted chaos

His face is flexible like Kermit’s, but he has permanently partially-lidded eyes that leave him looking exhausted in every scene he’s in

He’s generally unenthusiastic and seems like he wants to go home constantly

Jim Henson: The Works describes him as "lacking in spunk and charisma," which is hilariously cruel yet 100% accurate

What’s surprising at this point is that instead of scrapping him, he instead took on the role of orchestra conductor on the show proper, where he proceeds to do almost nothing for five seasons

The Muppets Character Encyclopedia actually provides a canon reason for this: Nigel lost the job of host due to his “shy manner”, and Kermit, feeling bad for replacing him, gave him his new job

He can technically be seen in basically every episode during the theme song, but aside from that, he often pops up in the chorus during songs

Which is funny when you consider he should be in the pit Doing His Job during those sequences

A quick list of his more important (if you can even call them that) appearances:

S1E2: He has Zoot play a song called “Sax and Violence” b/c pilot references

It’s actually implied the Mayhem falls under his jurisdiction as he threatens to fire Zoot, but this never comes up again

S1E24: Playing the part of a library patron noisily chewing gum (despite not having teeth. idk you figure it out). This one’s only notable because he’s wearing the same outfit from the pilot

S3E16: Nigel’s eyelids are not connected to the rest of his body and he’s facing backwards through the entire backstage segment so you’re uncomfortably aware of this

S1E23 has Floyd complaining that the theme song is cringe(TM), at which point it’s casually revealed that Nigel wrote it?? how is this character so important and unimportant at the exact same time

If you’ve seen this episode and aren’t deaf you might have noticed he has a completely different voice here. This is because John Lovelady has taken over as his puppeteer, presumably because Jim was busy Running The Entire Show

Nigel Voice Count: 2

Nigel has a talent for whistling, which is shown off in S2E18 during a performance with Floyd (this is the only time he comes on stage to perform that isn’t with a crowd)

He shows this off again in S4E18 to participate in the age-old sport of Annoying Sam the Eagle backstage

As of the 2011 movie Walter takes over as the show’s resident whistler because Nigel isn’t allowed to have character traits

He briefly shows up during the credits of The Muppet Movie (now puppeteered by Dave Goelz). Because of this, in the UK version of the end credits, he has another completely different voice

Nigel Voice Count: 3

After a brief background appearance in The Jim Henson Hour (S1E12), Nigel proceeded to completely disappear for 20 years

I’m guessing the reason was that his puppet was becoming unusable. The foam used for the muppets disintegrates over time, and his puppet was ~15 years old at this point

Things were particularly bleak for him in the 90s because Muppets Tonight came out with a new unrelated TV director character named... Nigel. Because Jim had passed away at this point and I think everyone working on the show literally Forgot they already had a character named that

Not that it would be that big of a problem, seeing as the chances of yellow Nigel returning were bleak. who was gonna spend time and money rebuilding an incredibly minor background character like him

TRICK QUESTION because he was rebuilt for The Muppets (2011), which is pretty amazing when you consider that he does Nothing during this movie

The new puppet looks pretty similar to the old one. I think the face is a bit rounder/more structured but I could also be losing my mind

(Side note: shoutout to whoever decided to give him a scarf in this scene. that’s such an unnecessary detail)

What’s great is that now that the puppet’s been rebuilt he’s shown up in a lot of stuff because they have no reason not to include him. Some of the more notable examples include:

The music video for OK Go’s cover of the theme song (which I certainly hope he would show up in I mean. it’s his song)

In the live shows (The Muppets Take the Bowl and The Muppets Take the O2) there’s a parade of overlooked characters, which includes Nigel. I just find it funny that:

A) The writers fully acknowledge that he’s King of the Background Characters

B) The in-universe implication that Kermit was like “no one knows who you are, wanna be in a parade celebrating that fact” and Nigel was like “okay”

His most recent appearance was in Muppets Haunted Mansion, where he’s dead (don’t worry about it). More importantly, he gets an entire shot to himself conducting some skulls, which I think is the first time the camera’s been focused solely on him in literally 40 years. Good job, buddy!

Here’s some other misc appearances that I couldn’t fit elsewhere:

He appears alongside Jim and a few other Muppets in a 1977 commercial for American Express (once again wearing his pilot outfit), which is particularly strange considering he’s the only character there that used to be puppeteered by Jim

In 2010 he got a somewhat important role in the first issue of Muppet Sherlock Holmes, playing the part of a butler suspected of poisoning the head of the house

He gets one whole page in The Muppets Character Encyclopedia from 2014 (right next to other Nigel). In addition to the aforementioned info bridging the gap between the pilot and the show proper, it also states that he’s susceptible to hypnosis and he trained at the Tommy Newsom Academy for Music and Charisma

In terms of future projects: there is both a Jim Henson biopic and documentary coming in the future (side note: why???), so it’s possible he might be discussed briefly in one of those

I have no thesis statement or reason for writing this, but I guess I’ll close out by saying that I find it fascinating that a failed main character from a pilot episode is still appearing in recent Muppet productions but solely as a background character. I hope that in 2073 I can put on some Muppet media and Nigel will still be there still doing absolutely nothing

thanks for coming to my TED talk

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic finder

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1. Hi! I looked everywhere for this fic so I’m afraid it’s gone. It was on ao3. Omega Wei Wuxian is captured by Wen Chao during a battle where he sets fire to a stronghold and meets Alpha Lan Zhan while they are both prisoners. The fic is mostly Wei Ying’s war efforts using his extremely violent heats to his advantage. Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen feature prominently as do the Wen siblings. It was a long-ish multi-chapter completed work. Thank you! @sicklyscribe

FOUND! I Will Not Go Gentle into the Quiet Night by TriviasFolly (M, 89k, WangXian, A/B/O Dynamics, Omega WWX, Alpha LWJ, no cultivation au, Vaugely Historical AU?, royal au, War AU, Slow Burn, Attempted Rape, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Murder)

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2. Hey, I'm looking for a fic where lwj summons an incubus or succubus wei wuxian. It is a bottomji fic. @imstillthinkingaboutithmm

FOUND! Lan Wangji's Fullproof Guide on How (NOT) to Summon a Demon by Howtosolveit (E, 3k, WangXian, Porn With Plot, but not a lot of plot, Incubus WWX, Demons, wwx has a tail, Wings, Interspecies Sex, Bottom LWJ/Top WWX, Anal Sex, Crack, Filthy, size queen lwj, Canon Divergence)

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3. hi! im looking for a fic where lan wangji and wei wuxian date as teenagers before lqr finds out and sends lwj to london with lxc

FOUND? Tempo Rubato by Spodumene (E, 107k, WangXian, Modern AU, Angst with a Happy Ending, Romance, Persuasion au, Separations, Mutual Pining, Depression, Miscommunication, Emotional Roller Coaster, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Reconciliation, Eventual Smut, Jane Austen Fusion, Underage Kissing)

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4. Hello mods! Thank you so much for all of your hard work. I'm looking for a wangxian fic that is set in the modern Omegaverse where WY is an omega and LZ is an alpha, and they're already an established couple at the beginning of the fic. The fic starts when both of them wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of chaos, as an omega uprising against the alphas has started, and their is a coup going on against the government and they're assasinating alphas. Then Wangxian meet up with Sangcheng and XuanLi to a safe house where they plan to move to another country for safety. I remember a WY thinking or saying something along the lines of, "It's my turn to protect you" to LZ.

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5. hi, need help finding a fic title. it should be quite popular. modern setting, wwx has powers to open and close... rifts? he and lwj go through one and get stranded in canon setting during postcanon. thanks for the help

FOUND! a tide in two seas by occultings (microcomets) (E, 81k, wangxian, modern w/ magic, parallel universes, post-canon, getting together, pining, case fic)

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6. good day! for the fic finder, can u guys help me find this fics: A) idk if its a jiang bashing but during the competition, wwx broke jwy's sword then he asked his father to have another one but his father didnt gave him any. then i think there's also a scene where jyl is also included in the competition that somehow she managed to form a core to fight but its not that strong.

B) i cant remember this one clearly but wwx stays with the lans at some point and he doesnt give a fvck with jyl. jyl wants wwx to come back to them (jiangs) but wwx knows his worth this time.

6A)

FOUND! Hua Xianle by Tiffany_Guinne (Not rated, 170k, hualian, wangxian, TGCF, canon divergence, not Jiang friendly, madam lan lives, WWX adopted by hualian, WWX with different name, overprotective hualian, hurt WWX, WIP)

6B)

FOUND! Never Again by Hauntcats (T, 67k, WQ & WWX & WN, JC & WWX, wangxian, graphic depictions of violence, major character death, Canon Divergence, AngstGolden Core Transfer Fix-It, I love Wen Qing and Wei Ying working together, Time Travel Fix-It, Not JC Friendly, Dark, BAMF WWX, mentions of abuse, Canon JC traits, Not Everyone Dies au, XY doesn't have a happy ending)

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7. Hi mods!! Love this blog and thank you for all that you do! ❤️ I read a fic a long time ago where at the climax Wei Wuxian formed a core from purified resentful energy. Can't find it again to save my sanity, would you be able to help?

FOUND? Sunder by naqaashi (E, 32k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Soulmates, Golden Core Reveal, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Heavy Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Denial of Feelings, Mutual Pining, Emotional Sex, Porn with Feelings, PWP, Light BDSM, Fix-It, POV LWJ, YLLZ WWX, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Top/Bottom Versatile | Switch WangXian, Light Dom/sub, Explicit Sexual Content, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Grief/Mourning, Five Stages of Grief, Suicidal Thoughts) the last chapter has a scene similar to the description

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8. hii!!! i’m in the need for a ficfinder!! the fic was basically wwx tries to call lwj because he thinks he got drugged at a party, but he doesn’t answer since lwj is having dinner with his brother and uncle and they aren’t allowed to have their phones, so he calls lxc instead and he answers.

lwj and lxc go into the bathroom where wwx is hiding and find someone trying to take advantage of him, so they beat him up. this is all i remember unfortunately!! :((

(modern setting), tsvm!! :D

FOUND! Please Let Me Take Care of You by kayceebabe (G, 9k, wangxian, LXC & LWJ, LXC & WWX, modern, Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Sexual Assaultish, kinda assault, drugged WWX, big brother LXC, Nightmares, the horrifying ordeal of being known, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Hurt WWX, crying WWX)

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9. Hi! Hope u'all having a good day! Is anyone of u know a fic where lwj got wwx pregnant and he didnt know about it. Wwx sent letters but lwj never got it because of lxz.

FOUND! Nothing but your heart by airinshaw (E, 21k, WangXian, Modern AU, A/B/O Dynamics, Implied Mpreg, First Time, Getting Together, Angst and Drama, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anal Sex, Whump, Breeding Kink)

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10. Hi! Can you help me find these 2 fics.

A) I remember this fic is a dark lwj. The lans ask Jyl’s hand in marriage for lwj however, since the jiang family know lwj as a bloodwar, they instead sent Wwx (disguised as female) instead of jyl. I remember when it was on their wedding night, lwj saw wwx’s robe covered in blood and discover wwx got a lot scars/wound on his back and learned that wwx is a boy.

B) Xicheng where Lxc and jwy are lovers but they got into fight to the point jwy thought it was better he was gone. Then, i remember jwy doing sacrifice soul summoning (like how MXY summons Wwx) to summon MY/JGY. It was successful.

10A)

FOUND? The Bloodthirsty Prince and his Bride by moss_enthusiast (M, 27k, WangXian, Angst with a Happy Ending Violence, Anxiety, Royalty, Strangers to Lovers, Arranged Marriage, Self-Worth Issues, Self-Esteem Issues, Whipping, Blood and Gore, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Past Abuse, Child Abuse, Physical Abuse, Blood and Violence, Dark LWJ, Fluff, Angst and Feels, Hurt/Comfort, Shock, Anxiety Attacks)

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11. hello! I'm looking for a wangxian fic where wei ying dies at qiongqi path and lan zhan hears about it went to burial mounds but he was too late. after that, song lan appeared at jin lintai with wen yuan and a-yuan went to lan zhan shouting rich gege. when a-yuan learns that wei ying is dead he keeps telling that his xian-gege is now asleep like his parents and sister. and then when a-yuan saw the golden robes of madam jin, jin guangshan he screamed and kept saying bad men. @zeanclr

FOUND? @lovelyiknow said: #11 from the most recent fic finder is When I’m Gone by qiankun_pouch, it’s mostly finished but was deleted at 29/30? 31? smth like that. I have the pdf if anon wants it!

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12. looking for a fic where lwj gets tortured, and is rescued. one thing I remember is that it was second person pov, and it was relatively short. also, lwj kinda had amnesia- as in the torture made him forget or something. thanks!

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13. hello ! i hope y’all are doing well. i wanted to see if anyone could find this one fic that i read ages ago, but i can’t remember the title. but basically, i think it’s where wwx gets his old body back after being cursed by a fox(?) spirit - like he transforms back. and i think somewhere in the story, the juniors are there and they ask sizhui what wwx originally looked like and when he draws them a picture, they think he’s lying bc wwx looks too good in the drawing !! it’s been sitting at the back of my brain, so any help would be much appreciated:)) thank youuu <;3 @slytherin-trash

FOUND? Transcend by covalentbonds (Not Rated, 7k, WIP, WangXian, Post-Canon, Fluff and Humor, Smut)

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14. hi!! I’m not sure if this is the right way to ask, if it isn’t, please correct me! Im pretty sure I had seen a fic on here where the description said that lwj just kind of showed up at wwx and a’yuans door and they were just kind of like ok sure why not. I’m sorry I don’t have more details my app crashed just after I saw it😭😭would you happen to have an idea of what it was?? Thank you so much😭

FOUND! Across the street to another life by danegen (M, 99k, WangXian, Modern AU, unleashed au, Family Fluff, Set in America, Hurt/Comfort, Past Child Abuse, Addiction, Crime, Amnesia, Ableist Language, another fridged mother, POV Alternating, past wwx/ofc, past wwx/omc, Medium parent YZY, A-Yuan is wwx's biological son, Musicians, Happy Ending)

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15. I’m sorry to ask this but I can’t find this fic and I searched it all day 🐇🐇🐇

A) I think, lwj and wwx are able to achieve immortality or are trying to achieve it and idk nor remember if it’s a omega verse or just magic bs but at some point in the story wwx asks how many children lwj would like to have and he answers 10 to which wwx thinks is joking but lwj is all serious about it XD

B) And also a fic where ylz ends up as a Jin and he’s usually in a garden surrounded by guards

Jiang Yanli is still alive and I think Jin zixuan too, but when wwx talks to JY he’s always formal and she can tell something is going on, there’s also wangxian and I think JGY is the one behind everything under his father’s commands

Thank you 🙇‍♀️

15A)

FOUND? Besieged by Ariaste (M, 11k, WangXian, WWX POV, wwx's avuncular powers, Teenage Drama, Humor, Feelings, Fluff) the second work of "A Civil Combpaign", the talk about lwj wanting more children surprised wwx, who had kinda jokingly suggested.

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16. Hi there, looking for a fic that had a 4/5 times wwx something 1 time lwj something format. Maybe based on jealousy or people hitting on them? One of the times was the head disciple of yunmeng jiang drugging and almost assaulting wwx but jiang cheng saves him. Please help, thank you!

FOUND! Cotton Wool by incendir (M, 34k, wangxian, LJY/OMC, JL/LSZ, JC & WWX)

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17. Hi! I’m looking for a fic when lwj is intersex and a river nymph I believe! wwx drinks water from lwj’s home and now he has to grant a wish. wwx at first thought that the price would be sxx but lwj actually asks him to build a rabbit hutch, a fence, and a house throughout the fic. This fic takes place over a course of a year or so and by the end they are married to live together! I remember this fic so clearly I just can’t seem to find it again. Thank you!

FOUND! Water Sweeter by deliciousblizzardshark (E, 8k, WangXian, Historical, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Some kind of fairy or spirit or something LWJ, Intersex LWJ, Intersex Character, Fluff and Humor, Crack Treated Seriously, Thirst Trap WWX, Topping from the Bottom, WWX's Canonical Cottage-core Fantasy, First Time, Domestic Fluff, Vaginal Sex)

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18. hi so I am looking for this one fic and all I remember is that some of the wen remnants were bloodline jiangs

Thank you @princess-nettle

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19. Hi! 🤗 For the next Fic Finder, I wanted to ask about a fic I read some time ago, and now I can't find it. It's a fic where LWJ and WWX have sex in Xuanwu cave and WWX gets pregnant. After that they separated and WWX thinks he have lost the baby, but he didn't lost the baby and WWX goes into labor in a fight with the bad Wens.

I hope you can help me find it! Thank you! 😊💜 @wangxiansgirl

FOUND! Impermanence, Transience, Permanence by Best Bepsy (BepsyGray) (E, 39k, wangxian, canon divergence, unplanned pregnancy, mpreg, gore, sunshot campaign, assumed miscarriage, medical procedures, childbirth, golden core reveal)

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20. I'm looking for a short fic, modern AU, mpreg, where Wei Ying doesn't know he's pregnant and gives birth on the bedroom floor. I only remember that and that he decided to walk home from work when he was feeling ill (still not realizing he was pregnant and in labor). Thanks, you are ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ @ilolatthis

FOUND! Surprise Baby! by trulywicked (M, 10k, WangXian, Modern with Magic, Modern Cultivation, Mpreg, Unplanned Pregnancy, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Didn't know he was pregnant, birthing scene, Little bit of blood, A/B/O Dynamics, Inspired by Twitter, Established Relationship, Fluff)

NOT FOUND! Blood, Google, and Love by Prairie_Grass (E, 4k, WangXian, Modern with Magic, they were roommates, A/B/O Dynamics, Getting Together, Mpreg, semi graphic giving birth, Alpha LWJ, Omega wwx, Intersex Omegas, (or you could head-canon WWX as trans if you wanted), Fluff and Angst, the run-on sentences are on-purpose because WWX and LWJ are both:, neurodiverse characters, slightly traumatic birth)

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[eff-plays]

But Astarion does seem to feel guilt/remorse when meeting the 7k spawns… idk it feels sometimes he does feel guilt and sometimes he’s just heartless.,

If this is in response to this post I made, then that post was in response to this and also some other fandom bullshit.

So I'm not saying Astarion doesn't feel remorse ever, but highlighting that at the core of his being, he is deeply selfish and self-serving, which a lot of fandom seems to either excuse away, or pretend is super good actually.

Here's the thing. Astarion does feel remorse ... in the Spawn ending. And obviously he feels no remorse in the Ascendant ending. So what happens with reglier ol' Asty? Well, he's not letting himself feel remorse. Because he's still not ready for it. He's still afraid of it. And like, yes! That's a totally logical thing for his character to do in that moment.

My problem is what people do next, and it's that they assume that his being this fucked up is actually an excuse to be a shithead to his victims and to others. That we should extend sympathy only to him and not to the people he's hurt.

"Well he was forced into it!" And? If I was forced into hurting someone else for my own survival, I'd still feel bad for hurting them? Most people would. I'm not saying Astarion doesn't, but that is distinctly how he acts. Which makes sense, self-defense mechanism etc etc. And stans agree that yes, he does supposedly feel guilt but he can't express it. So why do they excuse it when he instead chooses cruelty?

Again, I'm not making a moral judgment on him, he's a fictional character. I think what he does is (generally, I agree the reaction to the kids vs Sebastian is a bit odd) logical and makes sense for what he is. But pointing out those flaws of his, that were written like that on purpose, that are acknowledged flaws both in- and out-of-universe, doesn't make someone "gross" or a bad person. People disliking Astarion for his bad traits aren't automatically bad people who just don't get him.

He's a dick! He's written to be a dick! It's fine if people don't vibe with it or joke about killing him or do outright kill him! Will they miss out? Yes! But that's their perogative. People not liking Astarion, or hell, just doing something as innocuous as pointing out that he's kind of a huge asshole, are not uwu missing the point or being "gross" or whatever. They are acknowledging a fundamental and undisputable part of his character.

You can't on one hand wax poetic about how complex he is and how he lashes out because he's in such deep pain, and then take issue with people who point out how he lashes out and how it hurts others when he does so.

Speaking of, the thing about his reaction to the spawn kids? And how he supposedly feels bad but can't express it? He's all about killing them again! He wants to kill them! And when does he express remorse over both this wish and his actions toward them when he first victimized them? In the Spawn ending. The one that requires you to tell him no. Don't do that shit. It's bad. What you want is bad for you and for everyone else, even if it makes sense why you want it.

As a friend pointed out, it is kind of wild to see how life imitates art. In order for Astarion to get better, you need to acknowledge and push back against his cruelty and challenge his view of the world. That includes challenging his shitty coping mechanisms and reactions to things. And yet, it seems some people can't even do that.

You can acknowledge the complexities of his writing without using it as a cudgel against any and all criticism. And in particular, you can sympathize with him without attacking anyone who doesn't have the same level of sympathy, for usually quite understandable reasons.

Like I keep saying. Just because you understand how he acts doesn't make it somehow correct!

Anyway, sorry about that. I just had some thots because my brain is so big and full of worms.

[odinsblog]

Have you ever been over something, and then years later, someone, out of the blue, brings it up and it really just knocks the wind out of you?

Okay, so this is about high school. I’m nearly 40, so that’s multiple lifetimes ago, right?

I’m pretty sure that I’ve posted about this here at least once, but I can’t find the post to link to it

Here’s the deal

In high school I wasn’t …. hmm …. Idk exactly how to describe it. I played sports (track, football, swimming), but I wasn’t POPULAR popular, right? But I also wasn’t NOT popular

My high school (in Florida) hadn’t been desegregated for very long, and there weren’t a LOT of Black students but there was enough of us so that we felt as comfortable as you possibly could given the circumstances

But I was like a universal joint: I played well with others and I fit in well with almost everyone, and if you don’t include some of the overtly racist teachers, I had almost no enemies (don’t get me wrong, I definitely had my share of fights with school bullies, but after you win enough of those, they kinda stop trying you)

Anyway,

I cannot even tell you why, but for some reason in senior year I decided to run for president of the student class

Wild, right?

So after all of the preliminary votes, it narrowed down to two people (I was more surprised than anyone that I actually made it that far - I guess bc I never really expected to win, maybe running for student class president was kinda like a high school bucket list thing for me?)

Anyway, my final opponent was a white guy named Bill. I knew Bill because in high school somewhere along the way, it was impressed on me that I should participate in as many non-athletic extracurricular activities as possible, to make me a better rounded person, and I was in the SUPER FUCKING RACIST Interact Club with Bill. How racist was Interact, you ask? Well, you had to “apply” for membership to Interact. When I applied, I had no idea what it was. I just knew that my student counselor had suggested it to me, and why not ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(my graduating class was 2,500 students large, so it wasn’t as big as some of the schools I had attended up north, but it was “big” for Florida)

A teacher was responsible for actually running Interact, but the students really RAN it, know what I mean? Even though I had been working since I was 10yrs old, my Interact Club interview was probably my first real interview. It was kind of a big deal. Like, you had to schedule it and dress up for it and everything. And if you got accepted, your name got put up on a placard, prominently located on one of the main halls of our school

My first interview question, from the teacher in charge of the “club,” was: “Can you take racist jokes against Black people without getting angry?”

WTF??

To say the least, I was 100% completely caught off guard—I knew what racism was, and I definitely knew that it was present in my school, because I’d experienced it firsthand from other students and teachers, but for some reason I wasn’t expecting it to happen at Interact Club. Silly me

I suddenly became acutely aware that I was the only Black person in a room full of white people: the teacher/advisor, about 10 students who were already members of Interact, and mf Bill. Because OF COURSE Bill was already in Interact, and he was just grinning from ear to ear as I sat there in front of the classroom in this fucking “interview” from hell

BUT…! Anyone who knows me knows that one of my core personality traits is, if I get hit—no matter how hard—I always always always hit back. After a moment or two, my response was: “Yeah, can YOU take racist jokes about crackers?”

NGL, I’m not known for my quick wit, or always having the deftest or best clapbacks, but I surprised myself. I really patted myself on the back for that one

Nobody said a word for what seemed like an eternity. It was enough time that I still remember wondering if I might get detention or suspended or something

Finally, the teacher just said, “Okay. You’re in” and he got up, and quietly left the room. Leaving me alone with Bill and 10 not very amused white boys. Bill wasn’t grinning anymore

One or two of the guys got up (I was fully ready to fight, and I was cocky enough to believe that I could take them all down), but they just shook my hand, congratulated me and then they all left the room too

I would later learn that I was the first Black student in my county to get (“accepted”) into the Interact Club. This motif of, “first Black person to…” would follow me around in a lot of aspects in life, until my late 20s

Now, fast forward to the day before Election Day for student body president. It was my very first time giving a public speech. To a crowded auditorium full of my classmates. It was a little bit nerve wracking, but once I got into it, it was easy peasy. Enough so that I actually remember relaxing on stage and even ad libbing a few jokes into my speech. All in all, it wasn’t a bad experience. In fact, I kinda enjoyed it

Lmao, I made a shit ton of promises that I had no idea how I would keep, like getting the school to play music from the local Black radio station in the cafeteria during lunch—and the auditorium exploded in cheers and applause with this impromptu commitment of mine. Like I said, it was a good experience

Bill gave his speech, but I remember it being flat, bland and boring (kinda like Bill) and there was a smattering of claps here and there, and I distinctly recall thinking, “Is Bill really bombing here?” It surprised me because I was like, he had home field advantage, right? I mean, I could count on the Black students to vote for me, but collectively we didn’t account for more than about 15% of my student body class. We had to be bussed in. Bill shoulda been killing it. He had home field advantage, right??

The day after our speeches, was voting day. The principal told Bill and I that we would each be given the results in person before last period, and then the winner would be announced via intercom at the end of the school day. The principal made it clear that the loser would be expected to gracefully accept the outcome and shake hands with the winner. He was looking directly at me as he said this, but it didn’t bother me that much because I never really expected to win. I was outnumbered, but I was proud of myself for making it this far. And everyone who I passed in the hallways was telling me, “Don’t worry, O, I voted for you. You got this in the bag.” A surprising number of white kids were saying this to me. The football team, cheerleaders,… like … a lot of white kids. Hmm… interesting

Weirdly, the closer that me winning seemed like a real possibility, the more I wanted it. But there was no fucking way that I was going to actually win

In the middle of that day, announcement day, I was called to the principal’s office via the p.a. system. I was shaking walking down to the office

I made my way into the office and the school secretary smiled at me and told me to go to another room down the hall where “they” were all waiting for me

And now I’M SUPER NERVOUS

I get to the closed door of the room, take a deep breath, gather my nerves, open the door and go in

And the ONLY people in that room are Bill and that fucking Interact Club teacher, and a few members of the Interact Club. Bill is wearing this giant smirk on his face, and the teacher is smiling. “You lost,” the teacher bluntly told me. “Now shake hands with Bill”

And I start to shake hands, because all of the wind is rapidly leaving my sails, and I’m literally deflating in front of everyone, but just before my hand meets with Bill’s hand, I pause and ask, “How much did I lose by?”

This wasn’t me trying to buy time or anything, I genuinely wanted to know. I was just curious. The teacher looked like this question caught him off guard, and he looked back at two of the students, and then they looked at each other, and they whispered to each other, and then one of them raised one finger, and the Interact teacher said, “You lost by one vote”

Somehow, that was even worse than losing by a hundred votes

And Idk where this presence of mind came from, but I asked if I could get a recount (losing by one vote wasn’t sitting right with me)

The Interact teacher said he didn’t think that was allowed, but he must have seen the look on my face (I was definitely going to go ask the principal) and he gave me a disapproving sigh and said, “Okay, we’ll do the recount. Come back in an hour.”

And I was like, “WHO will do the recount?” and he gestures to the Interact Club members and himself

Oh. Okay.

I just walked out without saying anything. Bill and his friends and the racist teacher were in charge of the vote counting. Great. Fine. Whatever

Needless to say, when the “recount” was done, I still “lost” but this time, I was told that I lost by 2 votes

So yeah, it wasn’t thee worst thing to ever happen to me, but it left a really bad taste in my mouth, ya know? After it was announced to the entire school, everyone was coming up to me for days afterwards telling me that they voted for me and they couldn’t believe that I didn’t win

I always believed that I had won, but it was high school. Whatchagonnado? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

It wasn’t a life defining moment or anything, it was just something that happened, but it’s not lost on me that I still recall everything as if it happened last week

But I did let it go and I moved on

It’s something that I haven’t thought about literally in years. Decades, in fact

Until recently

I was out running one morning and a guy was going in the opposite direction and he kinda stared at me as I went around him. And then he yells, “Hey, is your name Odin?” and I stop and go back and tell him yes, and we start talking, and it turns out that he went to my high school. I completely do not remember him, but whatever. It’s always kinda nice to see old faces from old places

So after a few minutes we do the obligatory, “hey let’s exchange phone numbers and keep in touch” thing, but even though I gave him my phone number, I had absolutely no intention of ever contacting him. I’m busy. I got shit to do

Maybe a month later, I get a phone call and it’s the dude who I bumped into who knew me from high school. So in real time, it’s last week

We’re talking and I’m ready to hang up after about 30 seconds, but I don’t want to be rude so I let him keep talking and waited for the right moment to jump in and throw in an excuse to end the call

He’s going on and on and says, “I know you didn’t recognize me that day, but I was trying to talk to you and tell you something, but you seemed like you were in a rush…” and I’m thinking to myself, yeah, much like right now, and for some reason I get unusually blunt (in social settings I’m normally more patient and accommodating, but something felt off, and I really was busy)

Then he says, “I need to tell you something, but I …”

Long silence

Look, man, whatever it is just say it

“Thanks, I just never thought I’d … I want to get it off my … (long sigh)”

Just say it

“You won that election back in high school. I was one of the people counting the votes. You won. You won by a lot. We gave it to Bill”

……

[thegirlwhowrites642]

Say your response about snape reacting to hinny, honestly it IS one of my guilty pleasures in fics. I hate when people say that jily and hinny are similar therefore harry has an oedipus complex, he is NOT. He cant have it bc he wasnt raised by his parents so he couldnt have it. I like the pararell simply bc it fixes the "what could have been", idk i think its a bittersweet sentiment. And like ginny is similar to lily NOT in appearances. They dont look alike, the most is just an anecdote for 'Potters and redheads' but I do like how theyre girls' girls you know? Despite being athletic ginny is girly and so was lily, they are fierce and protective of their friends, they are smart but not bookish smart and know it all like hermione, theyre popular not only bc theyre pretty but bc theyre so nice and friendly. I think its sweet that these are the good qualities Potter boys seem to have fallen in love with. Its a cute history pararell that is not at all creepy and people trying to use it to invalidate hinny are just dumb (im looking at you harmony shippers)

As I said in that post, I do think that Snape certainly saw parallels between James and Lily and Harry and Ginny: Harry's suspicion that Snape keeps him more in detention to keep him away from Ginny is never narratively disproven. And while that could only be due to Snape's intense dislike for Harry, what he find out in DH (including Snape's obsession with the past) points in the direction of him seeing James and Lily in Harry and Ginny, even simply because Harry looks like James and Ginny is a redhead.

Though, as you said, Ginny and Lily look nothing alike and if people knew how the oedipus complex works, they would know that if Harry had one, he would fall for someone similar to Petunia.

Now, let's look at Ginny and Lily's differences in appearance.

Ginny is short, Lily should be of average height. 

Ginny is athletic, Lily is not. 

Ginny has freckles (even if not many, at least on her face), Lily doesn't. 

Ginny has flaming red hair, Lily has dark red hair. 

Ginny has bright brown eyes, Lily has green eyes. 

Also, from these traits, we can deduce Ginny has a warm undertone, while Lily has a cold one.

Of course, if jily fan artists stopped drawing Ginny with green contacts where Lily should be, it would help reminding people they are not long lost twins.

That said, there are some personality similarities between Ginny and Lily (and I also think the concept of Potter men falling for redheads is lovely). 

We found out Lily was popular with the boys through an interview in which Rowling, to explain that particular point, directly used Ginny as reference.

They are also both great with a wand 

They are both cheeky with professors, and for sure the fact that Slughorn likes both very much is telling. 

They are both smart. 

They both have a strong sense of justice. 

They are both brave. 

They both know what it means to lose a very close friend.

In general some similarities between the two are sort of inevitable considering that Lily is Harry's mother and Harry and Ginny are quite similar.

But there are also a lot of differences between them.

Ginny grew up poor, and while Lily didn't grow up rich, she was not Weasley type of poor. 

Ginny grew up in the countryside in the open air, Lily grew up in the suburbs (I apologize to all the Brits if this is not the correct term). 

Ginny is the younger of seven siblings and the only girl, Lily is the younger of two sisters. 

Ginny is part of a close-knit family, Lily isn't. 

Ginny is a pureblood, Lily is a muggleborn. 

Ginny is an athlete, Lily isn't. 

Ginny is popular with boys like Lily, but Ginny is also in general a very charismatic person who can keep the attention of a room, there's no proof of Lily being popular in that sense. 

Ginny has a thing for taking emarginate/fragile people under her wing, we don't know if that's the case with Lily, the only person we see her defend is her best friend (also, we can be sure Ginny would have been considerably more angry about the Mary MacDonald episode). 

Ginny has a stand-up comedian sense of humor, and while Lily seems to have a sense of humor it's not really on that level. 

Ginny can be quite feminine, we really don't know if that's the case for Lily, though I would suspect a teenage girl in a boarding school in the 70s who grew up in a female-dominated house would be. 

Lily's dominant trait seems to be kindness, and while I do consider Ginny generally kind, it definitely is not her dominant trait.

And of course they grew up in very different political circumstances, Lily had an overall normal teenagehood, Ginny was touched by darkness extremely young.

And I really could go on for hours in explaining why they are different, but it really wouldn't be fair. Ginny is a three dimensional character with light and dark sides, various interests, and fully developed narrative arcs that go on for seven books, while Lily simply covers the role of the angel woman and is therefore quite aetherial as a figure.

Regardless of this, as you pointed out, there's an element when it comes to jily and hinny of "fixing history", it's something Rowling has quite an obsession for throughout the seven books, the idea of the next generation doing better than the previous one. It is the reason why, for example, we see Draco in the epilogue, to show that Harry learned from the people before him to not hold hatred for years.

Harry and Ginny's story kind of reproduces James and Lily's one in a way. With one partner that falls first, and years of misinterpretation and refusal to admit attraction from the other. But this brings me to my next point, which is that if anything Ginny is James not Lily in terms of personality and the role she covers in her romantic endgame relationship, and it makes sense considering Harry is more like Lily: if the combination of James and Lily's personalities works, and Harry is more like Lily, it is only reasonable to assume Ginny will be somewhat similar to James. There's a foundation of truth in the idea that people usually end up marrying someone similar to one of their parents, and it's not the oedipus complex.

James and Ginny both have a tendency to surround themselves with "fragile" people. 

They are both excellent Quidditch players, they both are chasers with a talent for snitches. 

They are both bold and a bit arrogant. 

Even if for different reasons, they both grew up a bit isolated. 

They both do not have much of a problem with hexing someone they consider an idiot. 

They are both really funny. 

They are both smart and great with a wand. 

They are both charismatic.

They are both dorks at their core. 

They are both purebloods. 

They both have a fascination for stories and heroes and in general have a romantic streak. 

They both had to go through a journey of maturation to show their true selves to the object of their affection.

In general, I have to say that while there are parallels between the characters of the two different generations, I find it very limiting to connect a character to only another of the other group.

As written above, Harry and Ginny –in spirit if you will– are respectively Lily and James and inevitably therefore they assume those roles in their romantic stories. But there are points of view in which Harry is James and Ginny is Lily.

Harry, like James, is sort of the leader of his friend group, and Ginny as Lily is more or less the external element that eventually enters the group. In this idea Ron would be Sirius, the best mate of the leader. Though of course, the connection between Ginny and Ron is much stronger than the one between Lily and Sirius. And always in this perspective, Hermione is Remus, and not only in the role of the other friend. Hermione's loyalty to Harry seems often unjustified, sometimes it seems she would have been friends with Harry and Ron regardless of who they were simply because they accepted her as a friend and she didn't have any. This is a behavior that is reminiscent of Remus' inability to truly critique James and Sirius' questionable behaviors because they accepted him despite his werewolf condition. But then who is Peter? I've seen people say it would be Neville because they are both the losers, and always following the concept of the next generation being better, Neville does better then Peter because he doesn't let his fears turn him into a bad person. It's not even wrong as a concept but Neville is way closer to Ginny than he is to Harry. And then there's Luna. I've seen the people supporting this perspective of the generational parallels claim she would be Snape. Because they are both marginalized weirdos, and Luna does better than Snape because she does not turn into a death eater because of her isolation. Frankly, I'm not particularly convinced by the idea of defining Snape as an emarginate weirdo.

So as you can see, while some parallels can make sense, they always have their limits.

Another relatively popular idea is Ron and Hermione being like James and Lily. I've always found it very weak despite having some valid points. Yes, they are a pureblood and a muggleborn, Ron and Hermione are both prefects like James and Lily are both headstudents, and romione tends to cover quite often the role of surrogate parents for Harry. There's also an element of contrast between the partners. But fundamentally the dynamics are very different. Ron and Hermione have been best friends since age 11, that's definitely not the case for James and Lily. Then of course when you look at the relationship between Harry and the Weasleys, Harry is Sirius and Ron is James.

And to circle back to hinny: while I do not want to encourage the prongsfoot shippers, if you look at Harry and Ginny in terms of chemistry and attitude towards each other, they are James and Sirius, from the non-verbal communication to the banter. If you have ever read the short story Rowling wrote about James and Sirius, you can attest to the fact that those two could have easily been Harry and Ginny.

I think I might have gone quite out of the borders of your ask, but what I wanted to explain is that there are a lot of parallels that could be made between a lot of different characters, and they could be interesting to discuss without turning them into weird bashing theories.

I find that it is also important to distinguish between actual parallels the story makes, and dynamics that are similar simply because they are all written by the same author who, as authors do, has her themes and fixations.

The parallels between hinny and jily certainly exist, some are on purpose, and some are the consequence of how similar Harry and Ginny are. But one thing is for sure, if Harry married one of his parents, he married his father (lol).

[unicornjoking1111]

Use Regina George's personality to get what you want!!

hello guys! i am super excited to do this post because i have been a fan of regina george since forever! its not because i like her personality alot but i like some of the aspects about her which makes me admire her even more and how she uses people to get what she wants! if your into law of assumption or any manifestation community and also want to improve your self concept you can use regina george personality to get ahead (difficulties, get what u want and make other people act according to you, fame, glamour, attention etc..) although i suggest to be kind to everyone and not be so mean (you get the idea) but its upto you since you create your own reality so ya just f it!

What makes regina so popular apart from her looks! (logical manner)

regina's popularity comes from her looks i agree with that! but although its just an aspect which supports her popularity since if looks is the only thing which makes her popular karen and cady should also be popular because they have more chance to gain fame. so its not only her looks which gives her fame but also her minions (gretchen and karen) who supports regina to attain her power and also her bf aaron samuels who has the looks to support regina's fame! because of having these things this makes more admirable and wants to be her!! but how does she manipulate her minions to get what she wants?

gretchen "the follower" who always listens to regina and always tries to get reginas attention and thinks regina is her best friend. but infact regina knows gretchen will listen to her no matter what! so she is always be mean to gretchen and controls her so she will always listens to regina. this is preety sad since i have a soft spot for gretchen since she dosnt think about herself much and always support regina. also gretchen is very rich so this adds to her fame and social status aspect and makes gretchen join the group. and also gretchen knows about regina very well since gretchen is a "gossiper" regina only allows valid informaton about herself to be shared to the school so she uses gretchen to spread information about her.

karen is just a sidekick in my pov because although karen is a threat to regina because she is more preetier than regina but karen is known to be "dumb" and also a "slut" so this makes her unlikeable to other students so this reduces fame of karen and increases reginas fame more. but although she includes karen because she is a preety face which could support her social status. due to karen being "dumb" regina can easily manipulate karen really well.

regina uses these minions because its much easier to control them and also karen being preety and gretchen being rich adds a social ideal status to the group which makes it easy for regina to be number 1.

aaron samuels is just another hot guy in school and dating a hot guy leads to fame? idk it kinda dosnt make sense to me but this makes them the ideal couple since they both are really beautiful. and makes other people more envious of her because they think she has everything she wants (she is rich, have a hot boy , preety , a friend group who is also in that high status, popular etc..)

how to use her personality using alter ego or law of assumption

so i have told everything about the psychological process of regina george. although these traits are really manipulative and toxic but also using these things can help u get ahead of circumstances which is an advantage. i always use her personality and identify with her to get attention and so on.. so this makes it easy for me to enjoy my time and also experiment with her personality really well.

its just really simple! all u have to do is identify yourself as regina george and act like her. such as how she smile and walks and everything so if you do a little gesture of her u will start to act like her even more! and thats what it reflects! its so simple like once u start to identify it thats what is gonna happen.

u dont need to think u need glamour,hot bf and minions to get these things if you know the loa then yk its just a psychological game to get ahead. u have to think like her if its still troubling you imagine and keep persisting and be on that state again and again. even if you fall out just get back into it again. since regina george character is just an avator and we can all use her avator. just assume u are her then u are her.

(links)

1 , 2

these are the two links which helped me get more into the personality and make sure to see these things if u want.

all the best and good luck!

[aspd-culture]

Do you have any like actual tips for pro-socials who have antisocial loved ones, like friends or partners? So many sites are like “dealing with a [x]? Here’s ten ways to handle it!” and then it details abusive tactics (which is blatantly stupid, IMO, pwaspd/npd already expect the world to do this to them so idk where they’re getting the idea that pwaspd/npd wouldn’t expect this behavior because their upbringing TRAINED them to expect this behavior but hey, nobody said ableists actually knew what the fuck they were talking about).

I personally struggle with an aspd trait here or there alongside a bigger bpd/npd comorbidity so I get the pathological aspect of this disorder but truly, it is hard to like. believe them when they say they care or whatever because even though I know, mentally, that the bare minimum is pretty much their way of trying to care when they don’t get anything out of it like I do, a small part of me wishes for the mask back where I got the effort and adoration I used to. It sucks but I also don’t think pwaspd should also be left behind in society just because their relational instincts got fucked up before they had a chance.

Idk. I feel like there’s a lot of ableism that people without aspd need to unpack (myself included) but it’s also like, what do you do when someone quite literally admits to manipulating you (in an effort to hold themselves accountable) and frequently lies to make their lives easier? Like I get it Mentally and I can pinpoint why their actions Are them trying to care and show care, especially if they actually do care and well, aspd innit? but the mental understanding is one thing and the craving for the emotional connection with them is another.

I hope this is cohesive and I hope I’m not imposing or being an ableist dick or anything, I just. Don’t think it’s fair to hold the disorder against them and a grand majority of people who think “HOLD THEM ACCOUNTABLE” about mental illness advocacy is almost always punitive and withholding and expecting an exorbitant amount of groveling or self-flagellation on part of those with “scary” disorders and idk how to approach this with sensitivity and nuance that it deserves and requires.

Ok, so first part of your question asked for tips for prosocials who have antisocial loved ones. Here I go into how to support someone with ASPD (suspected or diagnosed).

Following the tips further down in this post can avoid conflict as well as help you communicate in ways that are effective to pwASPD.

As for dealing with someone telling you they are manipulating you, try and remember that much of the socially acceptable (and even some mandatory behaviors) are manipulation. Manipulation is just trying to affect someone's feelings, thoughts, or actions, or trying to change the end result of a situation. This includes flirting, job interviews, college applications/essays, pay raise negotiations, court proceedings (on the part of everyone in that room except the judge and jury), etc etc etc. If you have ever apologized with the hope or expectation that you will be forgiven, you have manipulated for your own gain. If you've ever bought someone dinner before asking them a favor, you have manipulated someone. One of the most romantic things someone can do - an elaborate proposal where you take them on a lovely date to their favorite places and make them feel special and then list all of your favorite things about the person before asking them to be with you forever is MASSIVE manipulation. It's just not malicious manipulation. Have you ever tried to convince someone to get out of an abusive relationship? That's manipulation for the purpose of sabotaging a relationship because you believe it is what is best for another person, even at the expense of what they think about it and what they want. Does that make it wrong? Of course not. There is such a thing as being manipulative in neutral and/or positive ways - society just doesn't like calling all of that stuff manipulation because the word manipulation has been given a nasty connotation.

As for the lying, though, if they are lying to *you* consistently and not making effort to change despite communication about it (including reassurance that you will allow them to explain themselves fully without interrupting and do your best to remain calm even after that no matter what they tell you - people with ASPD need that if you expect us to give up a coping mechanism as big as lying in a close, vulnerable relationship/friendship that we don't want to lose), that is a problem. It is not acceptable for them to lie to you. You are entirely in your right to make boundaries and separate yourself if they can't be honest with you, especially about big/important things, but honestly about anything. If they're lying to other people in a way that doesn't affect you, though, why is that a problem? They are dealing with their symptoms and making certain they are doing so in a way that doesn't harm you. That is very difficult for someone with ASPD, as it would be for anyone with any personality disorder, and that effort should be respected and appreciated.

Also who *doesn't* do things to make their lives easier? If you were being asked by a creep at a bar for your number, would you give it to them? Would you maybe lie about having a partner or give them a fake number or say you had to go for a pretend emergency to get out? Yes, those lies are for your perceived safety because that situation could be dangerous, but for pwASPD (people with ASPD), every interaction with other people has as much potential for danger as the situation I described. It is understandable to not be used to seeing things that way, but that was our life during vital stages of development and there are things we had to do to adapt to that reality. ASPD literally changes how your brain is wired, so there is only so much that you can expect us to change, and one thing you cannot expect from most of us is to get rid of that belief that we are in danger. Trying to only really makes us see *you* as a danger trying to get our guard down so you can hurt us.

I also don't think "the bare minimum" is a fair way to describe the way pwASPD show love. It not being what you're used to is not the same as it being the bare minimum. It takes an exceptional amount of work on the part of someone with ASPD to try to understand, accommodate, communicate with, and avoid hurting prosocials what with all the extra effort that requires for us. We literally work more than a prosocial does to be "extra" in a relationship just to manage what you call the bare minimum. What is caring about someone if not inconveniencing yourself purely for the sake of understanding them and making them happy? What is love if not effort?

I do understand wishing for the mask to come back, but as someone who has disorders you mentioned in your ask, I'm hoping you understand why asking them to do that would be unfair, unrealistic, and ableist. However, it is none of those things to privately miss that time, and it sounds to me like you're doing the latter which is in no way problematic in my opinion.

There are ways to ask for some of their previous behavior and treatment back without asking them to mask again, if it's things that aren't symptoms of ASPD themselves. For example, if they initiated hangouts/dates more often before, it's completely reasonable to ask them to do that again. If they no longer are expressing interest in your emotions, you can address that concern. Things like that don't have to be asking them to mask - it can just be asking them to do some things within your love language. That's not unreasonable if you're being kind, communicating with them, and making sure your requests are made within reasonable expectations with their symptoms.

You're allowed to have needs and most pwASPD will respect you much more if you can effectively communicate exactly what they are, rather than a generic "I don't feel like you care about me as much anymore" or expecting us to read social cues we aren't wired to understand/look for. I have given (and stick by!) more than one pwASPD the advice to not engage with guessing games and make boundaries expecting their partners to communicate in a way they can understand easily - and thus to not adjust behavior unless they have been told that it is causing harm unless it is *blatantly obvious*. When I say that, I don't mean obvious to prosocials; I mean things like physical or sexual abuse. Even raised voices are pretty normal to plenty of pwASPD, to the point where it isn't obvious that that would scare or hurt someone.

However, if no amount of simple behavioral changes or verbal reassurance can convince you that someone with ASPD cares about you without them basically not having the disorder or letting you cherrypick allowed symptoms, then I feasibly see two choices for you. This isn't me trying to be a jerk, just being objective to what I think makes sense for you and them. The first is that you can put in the work yourself to unlearn the ways that you're used to care being shown to allow you to accommodate your loved ones with ASPD without feeling hurt. If that isn't something that can work for you, that's okay. It's okay to have boundaries and be honest with yourself about what things you are incompatible with. However, at that point, the only thing to do that would be fair in my opinion is to separate yourself from the people with ASPD that are in your life.

I'm not suggesting you never speak to them again (although you are certainly allowed to make that choice for yourself). I'm suggesting you may need to restructure your relationships with those people such that feeling like they don't care (so long as they are doing their best to show they do) won't negatively impact you. In other words, for example, if you can't handle a partner showing they care the way they do because of their ASPD, then it's your job to end that relationship with them and either entirely remove yourself from their life, or just be friends.

If that's the choice you need to make for yourself, then I think it's important that you stress to them that this is not anything they have done wrong or need to work on - that it is an issue with how you are able perceive people caring about you. It's hard to say this in a way that won't sound ableist, because admittedly the issue would be rooted in some societal ableism (not really ableism on your part, just that the way children are taught to perceive love is incompatible with ASPD and even other disorders that can affect empathy and such).

It is very important to note that most of this does not apply if what you are dealing with is abuse - meaning for the purposes of this that they know they are hurting you, they are in control of the behavior that is hurting you, and are choosing to continue it without making any effort to change despite you clearly communicate your pain and what exactly is causing it. To evaluate that, you need to be objective and really ask yourself if you're coming from a reasonable place or not. Are you asking this person to either not have a disorder or allow you to pick and choose what symptoms you find acceptable? Or are you communicating boundaries to protect your wellbeing and making compromises that work for both of you while respecting their past and their symptoms? Those are two very different things, and there are shades of gray inbetween. Asking another prosocial who has not intentionally worked to unlearn their ableism against ASPD and done their research into its symptoms or a pwASPD who has not taken reasonable steps to heal their trauma and not hurt those close to them is not going to be truly objective. If you have a therapist who is aware of and respectful of ASPD, they would be a relatively objective place to evaluate what is abusive vs symptoms they can't be expected to control, assuming you could keep your language neutral (moreso than in your ask, which while not disrespectful or ableist, was definitely not entirely neutral). However, as a person with ASPD I would always prefer my partner speak to me about their concerns over my behavior before they ask anyone else - so if you haven't done that, I would certainly advise you to start there.

Even if any of the things I said are ableist or are rooted in ableism apply to you, it's worth noting I'm not saying or implying you are ableist yourself. Evidently, you came to a blog to get help with this situation from someone who understands the perspective of your loved one as much as possible, and that shows you likely aren't ableist - but as you mentioned one can have ableism to unlearn while not being ableist themselves. Please do not take any of this post as aggressive or attacking. It was all written in a neutral tone, I promise. I am aware how my text tone can come off to prosocials, which is why I specify this. If I was upset with the ask or thought you were just an ableist person or that the ask was disrespectful/not in good faith, I would just delete it.

I hope this helps and if you have or need any clarification, have any other questions, etc. you are more than welcome to submit them to me./gen

[the-meat-machine]

Im confused about Cherub anatomy

I thought it was kind of odd that they have gender? Like you could assume that they just choose one because they're trying to project an identity on the same body which sorta gives an indication that the body lacks male or female traits for this reasoning to make sense. BUT, if we look at Caliborns/Calliopes mother and father theres some clear sexual dimorphism. It makes me wonder how their bodies even get that way? I ended up theorizing that they may metamorphosize to achieve these differences. My theory 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘺 hold some weight, ex: in Caliborns Masterpiece we can hear that his voice is deep and snarly. Now, we haven't heard Calliopes voice to make a fair comparison after all, she could also possibly sound just like that. So maybe this isn't the strongest example but when Cherubs sleep and when the other personality takes over, the body does change. From the eyecolor, tongue color, cheek color, and blood color, as for body figure it's unclear if that changes when waking up. If we want to count how Caliborn and Calliope are drawn in Act 7, in the opening you can see Calliope has a curved figure and breasts while Caliborn has a wider shoulders, and a flat chest . But then again, Calliope is drawn differently multiple times throughout the act 7 flash so maybe not much weight either. The strongest basis i have for this is probably just how their mom and dad look. In conclusion: either their body fully transitions into the other gender when one of the personalities wakes up then swaps into the other gender when sleeping for the other personality to take over the body with their traits included OR the body has both male and female traits at all times and are stuck there until the one the personalities wins the body and the loser personality bodily traits disappear from the body so the winners traits take over. But this could also not hold weight since Caliborn apparently didn't know what boobs were when talking with Jane. But yet again Calliopes drawings featured boobs so idk. Feel free too tell me everything i got wrong not even i know what the fuck im talking about I've been listening to karkalicious for like 6 hours today (newer version)

So I came into this ask fully intending for my answer to be "cherub sexes make no sense, just throw them out". But then as I was writing out why they make no sense, I accidentally came up with an explanation that makes them (sort of) make sense. Whoops. I'm going to post that as its own separate thing, 'cause it got long, and I probably should edit it to include a clearer explanation of isogamy, ha ha… ha.

But anyway, that aside, some of the details you brought up still don't really make sense - especially alt!Calliope's appearance in Act 7. Because the thing is, alt!Calliope shouldn't look like an adult cherub at all. Even if she predominated "correctly", she still died young, before she could fully mature. If she was truly fully grown, she would have wings, but she doesn't. And during the conversation where she and alpha Calliope meet, the two of them appear to have the same height and build.

The simplest explanation for her Act 7 appearance is that it's just art weirdness. But if we wanted to come up with an in-universe explanation, two possible ones come to mind:

She's a ghost. Ghosts are shown to be able to change their appearances, either consciously or subconsciously. So she's given herself a more adult body that matches her adult mind.

She lived long enough after predomination for her body to partially, but not completely, mature. Thus, she has a somewhat adult-like body, but doesn't have wings and doesn't look as large as the adult female cherub we see depicted elsewhere (because even the females are pretty darn ripped). In this case, it's during the conversation with alpha Calliope that she's altering her appearance, perhaps choosing to make herself look younger to put Calliope and/or Jade at ease.

As for Caliborn seeming to have broader shoulders in Act 7 than Calliope does, we could say that maybe it's just that Caliborn has more muscle mass there by virtue of being more physically active.

I do like to imagine (when I accept that cherubs have biological "sexes" at all) that young cherubs have undifferentiated bodies, and they only develop into "male" or "female" forms after predomination. This fits in with what Aranea says about how the only way to tell the two young cherubs apart is by the color of their cheeks (though as you note, there are a few other differences too).

But that's still kind of complicated, because what makes one of the personalities definitively "male" and the other definitively "female" when their bodies are identical? My best theory is that there's some sort of hormone or something in their blood that differs between juvenile males and females, since the blood seems to be the main thing that physically changes when they swap bodies.

As for Caliborn not understanding what boobs are while Calliope does... that's probably just because Calliope actually pays attention to humans, whereas Caliborn is willfully ignorant about them.

(p.s. I didn't notice until this ask that alt!Calliope appears to have boobs in Act 7. I always assumed cherubs didn't have them, since during Aranea's explanation, the art is ambiguous enough that you could interpret the female as being flat-chested. But no: act 7 says cherub boobs. Argh. Why. I am rejecting this from my personal headcanon and assuming that it was just some weird folds in alt!Calliope's robes that made her look like she had boobs.)

[dogtoling]

how do you come up with your ocs personalities, designs, and stories? (sorry idk how to word this properly)

Honestly this is a really good question and really hard to answer because I have no idea myself, and it also really depends on the OC. With most of my older OCs like Amber or Peppermint, when i made them initially it was pretty much a random grab bag and I've just been building on that over time to see what works. A lot of the times I'll make an OC and they will just kind of drift over time to be completely different, and that just happens naturally. They don't tell you this about OC or character design but after a certain point it stops being character design because the OC will just have a mind of their own so it can actually become really hard to make decisions like, "what job should this character have?" or "should this OC get a new haircut?" because it's not even your choice at some point. It pretty much becomes "WOULD this OC do such and such".

Historically when it comes to making OCs I've had like, dozens of OCs that never become anything and it's really a case of lacking identity or purposes. A lot of the time when making OCs in the past I've just sat down and tried to design a random character and assign them some kind of super basic personality and gearset from the game, and that often goes NOWHERE. So more recently when I've been making characters I've been trying to start from establishing what kind of character I could include in the general setting, what their "purpose" is, and THEN work on the design and character itself to fit that part.

My most recent character is actually Frillda, and for her I just had the basic premise of "i need a cool meangirl character for this lowkey evil Turf team". And I also failed, because she's not very evil at all, but she still fits the role I think. But that's part of the fun I guess, and I struggled like hell to get her design to a point where it felt good, and considering i've drawn her literally twice it WILL probably change over time.

But basically when it comes to OC designs and personalities, I find that leaning hard into a theme or personality trait will make a more interesting character than trying to immediately balance out the character into a more "realistic" one. By interesting I mean like, memorable and impactful, to where that character has a clear identity. Once you have that, it in turn becomes much more interesting working out how that character would act in different situations, and how they deal with stuff like anger or unwelcome surprises. So like my current go-to strategy is start simple, don't be afraid to lean into weird or niche themes (there's ALL kinds of people out there and variety makes the world feel more alive), and just kinda build from there. And if a character starts developing some kind of theme, try leaning harder into it and see what comes out of it.

As for stories, it's really random and I MEAN it's really random. Pretty much all my character stories have originated from me going "what if my OC did x or had x thing happen?" and then flipping a coin in my head and seeing how it would affect the general story and other characters. And if the result is interesting or at least mention worthy, then I usually go forward with it. Life works in really unpredictable ways and stuff just happens, so I find that just going with things like that and even embracing stuff that comes out of left field can be really interesting to put in a story. And other times the inspiration just comes from an external thing randomly. like Toast only got run over by a car because of that Four G's post I saw on tumblr and I had to assign them to ONE of those, and Amber and Peppermint are only a couple because I did a shipping roulette meme in like 2017 and they looked cute together so I had to work it in.

[churbington]

fugo mista parallels thing idk

edit 10/24: okay hi i thought id pop in and share that a HUGE addition to this post has been made here and I think people should go give it a read too bc my thoughts are a lot more organized there thank chew ^_^

okay im going crazy i have to post this somewhere but I think the parallels between the fact that fugo and mista are the last surviving original bucci gang members is so deeply fascinating to me because they are like Direct Opposites in like. virtually everything I think. I'm gonna ramble but I'll try and include a tl;dr before the break

tldr; fugo and mista are opposites in a long of aspects including personality, choices, and general appearance and I find it deeply fascinating that the only two original gang members to survive are such polar opposites of each other and its a very unique and interesting dynamic. Fugo's like the first to join, Mista joins last but then fugo is the first to leave and rejoin again after everything and that can be seen as wavering loyalty (depending on who you assign that loyalty to) while mista's been there since the start and the possibly imagery and symbolism with religion (though that's more fanon territory) and with regards to PHF- like its also so. interesting! They've been strangers from the start so watching your friends die and then a stranger be the only one to live is soul crushing... idk its so neat and I think it should be a dynamic that is explored more

okay so the way i see it is that fugo is extremely logical, rational, and very guarded about who he is and refutes his wants over saying what people expect out of him. He's shorter compared to mista (which. btw why the hell is fugo 5'10" I thought he was a chill 5'6" what the fuck), blonde, green/red color palette, (generally accepted that) he was the first to join the bucci gang and the last to leave it and THEN rejoin it if we count PHF, has a very realistic out view of life, etc. etc I could go on.

Mista, on the other hand, is much more laidback and down to earth with a carefree attitude with a sense of optimism and sense of things are not as complex as they ought to be (like a very simplistic way of seeing things I'm bad at explaining this but its a generally agreed trait he has). He's taller, presumed to have darker hair, blue/red color palette (that directly contrasts fugo's), (also generally accepted that) he was the last to join bucci gang and never left it as well as being the only one to survive (ignoring fugo for this), etc.

There's more you can definitely compare between the two like religious imagery (though that's more in fugo anime's case as it's not really there for mista in canon its just more of a general hc the fandom has made around him) but I think it's sooooo interesting how fugo and mista ended up being the ones to survive like. Thinking about it realistically fugo and mista are essentially strangers to each other through the entire thing. Granted yes, they were all sort of strangers to each other even if they were close (like the first thing I wanna think of is that Abbacchio and Fugo trusted each other but were still strangers as said in PHF) but I think it's really apparent in fugo and mista's case. Fugo has essentially been with Bucciarati (and by definition all the other gang members) since the start if we are to assume that fugo joined first. Mista, on the other hand, joined last (as a generally accepted order) so they barely got to know each other before the events of golden wind started.

So imagine being Mista, a guy who just joined a gang and barely just got to know everyone in it, and the one assholey guy who's sort of a dick all the time, ends up being the only one to survive because he was a coward (aka scared for his life and possibly of defying such a high authority due to previous trauma) and just. Augh. augh. that would be so fucked up and then it happens and it IS fucked up.

And also like imagine being fugo, scared out of his god damn mind because everyone he's been able to even remotely trust and care about over the course of him joining 2ish years ago suddenly defecting and risking their lives for some girl, and the only one to survive in the end is the newbie and the 2nd newbie who threatened you with a gun later.

Like god my thoughts are seriously all over the place so it's sorta hard for me to make this coherent but I think it's super interesting that fugo and mista survived while being direct opposites of each other and having to live with that fact and possibly even make a new friendship (or at least professional relationship) out of that like. god! god. what a nightmare! It's like an inverted mirror of each other and watching as the one thing you hated get to live on while the people you cared about are rotting dead in the ground six feet under because they simply wanted to be somewhat good people in the end, even after what they've done is probably significantly worst. Even as horrible as they are and the deeds though do, they have some small kind acts (cough cough bucciarati taking in WAYYY too many teenagers into the mafia cough cough)

Once again i just think its such an interesting dynamic and introspect into their relationship bc. once again I see them as essentially direct oppositions of each other and so knowing that any kind of mediator between the died forces them to reconcile over the fact they are the last surviving members, even if their outlook on the gang are polar opposites. They would definitely fight and bicker over everything like knowing bucciarati and what he wanted, the reason for staying/leaving, narancia. just narancia, like there's SO much there. i would love to see it explored more especially whenever you throw like giorno and trish into the mix bc it just makes it even Weirder for these two and its augughufghu maybe someday ill make a more proper post over this but hopefully you guys like. get the general gist of this because I am losing my mind constantly

[james-fun-in-the-sunderland]

Mob Psycho 100 for fandom! And Amy from Sonic for character~

omg hello thank u niru c:

obligatory link back to the original ask game

Mob Psycho 100

sorry that alot of these repeat and probably arent like insane thoughts, i was only big into mp100 when i was like 16 and finished the anime like a year ago 😭

Favorite character: Serizawa c: hes a 6w5 so legally i must enjoy him but also i just like him ... he has curly hair and is cool OH AND TOME !!!! shes fun :) i dont fully remember my interesting thoughts on her but i enjoy her and how she works for reigen post canon. i think her weird girl charms get to me

Least Favorite character: uhhhh probably mogami or shous dad... theyre both just annoying like whateverrr stop being a dumb adult stop beefing with 15 year olds losers...

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): 1.... serirei?? is that the ship name. serizawa and reigen. basically canon ? 2. mobteru again basically canon 3. . um . theres not much ships i really have with this show so idk if i can do 5 but i can at least do three bc i think tome and mezato is cute :) i briefly became obsessed w them for a bit after season 2 .... i think the ship of the two claw guys . the like sword one and the other guy is pretty cool...

Character I find most attractive: serizawa. who would have guessed.

Character I would marry: nobody everyone here has many red flags also theyre 90% children

Character I would be best friends with: if i was a teenager there is a non zero chance i genuinely would be besties with tome but also maybe slightly find her annoying. but also maybe i would become besties with mob. in normal life none of them bc i would never talk to children or the adults in the show

A random thought: i think reigen is one of the last tumblr sexymen before that term really became used as meaning: character im sick of seeing so much of... but also i could be wrong. also can everyone stop drawing serizawa with straight hair ... i know they do in the manga/anime but if he had curly hair before they cut and washed him then it wouldnt go away. thats not how hair works and i should know as ive lived with it for like years.

An unpopular opinion: mogami arc wasnt that good, stop using it as an excuse to be weird abt child characters plsss

My canon OTP: nothing is canon :/ so

Non-canon OTP: serirei as i said above ☝

Most badass character: mob :] hes cool and awesom... but also i do think

Pairing I am not a fan of: idk if its bc i dont remember much but i cant see shou and ritsu as much more than besties but also obvs im not at all a fan of the . weirdly large amount of reigen and mob stuff like whats wrong with you all im killing you . i also just dont care too too much about ships between teenage characters so many of the ships in the fandom are like yea thats alright, also can see them as just besties, u kno?

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): i didnt realize how little there was of serizawa in the manga or the anime .. i feel like he had more when i first read it ???? anyway he should be there more .

Favourite friendship: i think mob and reigen are fun as friends :) especially as they grow older, i think the dynamic would be fun. also teru and ritsu are fun when theyre together. worlds most dramatic 12 year olds.

amy will b under the cut

amy rose :)

How I feel about this character: I like her !!! i feel like shes not talked about much outside of ships which is a shame because i feel like if people came together on her character (this includes people writing canon) then there could be a compelling character here that wouldnt deny her roots or just stay the same sort of trope she used to be. I cant deny i do enjoy that they occassionally dip into her little interest in tarot :) its nice to see that trait remembered.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: sonic of course, shadow, blaze a bit?, metal sonic anddd... yea thats it

My non-romantic OTP for this character: i think her with silver or knuckles is always fun :) idk why i think its because they bounce off of each other well. equal levels of no braincells happening here at least with silver. and with knuckles i feel like they could have a fun brother sister dynamic.

My unpopular opinion about this character: what is the popular opinion on her .... idk ill just use this as more of me talking about her character in general. i wish people would use her abandonment issues more, or at least like integrate that into her character since i think its a trait that shows up a bit in the little visual novel and in sonic frontiers and i think that makes sense as a trait for her

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: if she was ever playable again . I HAVENT played the sonic frontiers dlc but i think giving her a little spin off game ala the princess peach games would be fun. maybe then her team from sonic heros can be used again and i could like care about big and cream outside of them being sparingly used in canon .. and big not just being a joke ... also i just want more development for herrr im always begging for development or character in this series i know its for children but plsss also i wish they would like actually like .. fully deal with her whole thing with sonic... it feels like they wanna pretend her obsession just never happened and wasnt like the main thing with her character before they basically turned her into sally acorn.

My OTP: honestly ive really come around on amy x metal sonic :) i think mainly bc i cant see her with sonic at all (<- sonadow truther) and also i think it could be interesting if i thought about it more deeply

My OT3: amy x sonic x blaze i know i just said i cant see her with sonic but this is the exception, if i had to have an ot3 it would be this .. otherwise idk if i would have one.

[greenapplebling]

Sun god Aten and... love goddess Hathor?

So I'm not an expert myself but I was hearing a podcast about underrated love gods (Valentine coming up and all that shadda shadda) and Hathor came up and I was like "yooo, you sound familiar?"

And then I remembered it. It was like 2 years ago when I looked her up briefly bc someone made a Yuunoa theory and the gist of it was that if Yuu is/represents sun god Aten and if the cover of Vol 23 (see below) implies that Shinoa is/represents the goddess of the moon (I don't remember her name, but I think it was a goddess that was linked to cats/had the head of a cat) then that could be a foreshadowing of Yuunoa being endgame bc those 2 gods are married in the Egyptian mythology

Anyways, the op of that post got fact-checked by the whole comment section (lol). That moon goddess they were talking about is portrayed as Aten's daughter more often than not, is love goddess Hathor the one who's usually portrayed as Aten's wife and mother of his children (Note: including Aten/Ra*, Hathor had lots of spouses but all of them were related to the sun)

*Note #2: Aten and Ra are confusing to me but it seems like they are different entities, but there's a moment when Ra merges with Aten, though Idk if it's permanent or temporary

I didn't say anything at the time, but to me, the more I learn about Hathor the more I believe that there is a character who could represent her: Mika

1- The entity of many forms

Even though Hathor is known for being the goddess of love and motherhood, it seems that binding her to just a concept is unfair bc Hathor is known as the goddess of the many faces or forms. This is a little confusing to me, but she seems to have many roles. For ex, not only is she Ra's wife and lover but she can also be his protector if needed (more on this later). The way I connect this to Mika is that he's the character that passed through the most forms along the story: from angel to human to vampire to demon

Love goddess Hathor

2- Motherhood

I don't think this should be a surprise but I always thought one of Mika's most prominent traits is how motherly he is. He takes cares of others, he protects, he loves. We don't get to see this side of him often in the present (unless it's Yuu) bc of his trust issues, but I think it's noticeable how much he cares about others. And if that is not convincing enough, let me remind you of Mika's biggest desire: have his family back. In the dream Yuu and Mika took care of the other children, made food for everyone, bathed them, etc., Mika even jokes that they're like their parents and if that doesn't scream family-oriented then I don't know what does

3- The first vampire

I mentioned before how one of Hathor's forms is to become Ra's protector, right? Well, there's a story of how Ra mistrusted the humans and thought they were conspiring against him, so he sent Hathor in the form of Sekhmet to earth to punish everyone that was scheming against him. At some point Sekhmet tasted blood and, no longer caring about her divine job, she let her bloodlust run wild to the point she almost destroyed humanity. Sekhmet is the first vampire in mythology that we have records of. Not only do I tie this to Mika bc of his former vampirism but also bc his protection of Yuu was at his peak when he was a vampire

War and healing goddess Sekhmet

BONUS: 4- Aten's wife

Mika being Yuu's wife is a running joke in ons, do I need to say more?

.

What do you guys think? Do I have a point or am I going bananas? Lol, I'm open to corrections and discussions if I got anything wrong

[somechillthoughts]

ok this is my first ever tumblr text post (or whatever u call it) but i wanna just ramble about something interesting i like of always sunny.

(btw i'm not that far deep into sunny either, i just know a lot from clips and compilations)

one thing that always interests me when discussing sunny through a queer lens is that charlie is one of (if not the only) member of the gang that doesn't really lean that heavy into patriarchal, toxic masculine stereotypes unlike the rest.

dennis is a prolific sex addict who uses sex as a way of dominance over women and to fuel his egotistical behavior, constantly using women as sex objects and trying to portray himself as "the leader" of the gang (which he kinda is).

mac's constant inner fight with his own sexuality and religious/conservative upbringing made him conceive this persona of what a man is supposed to be. he shows off this posture of machismo that is clearly all a lie to keep his true emotions and feelings coming out, not to mention him trying to get his father's attention throughout his life made him adapt a lot of his harmful traits as well.

dee being the only women of the group has its faults surrounding herself with men who don't treat her at all good, but she's always able to throw that same shit to the other women in the show who she seems to think are competition, competing for male validation and a way of feeling superior to women beneath you.

frank is the oldest and more traditional of the gang, constantly displaying bigotry wherever he goes, this including instilling patriarchal and misogynistic tactics cause he doesn't know better (or just doesn't care). his constant homophobia towards mac in the early seasons to then his coming out episode is clear of a sort of insecurity and this old school way of thinking of how men should be.

but charlie? he's a whole different case all together.

ofc all the gang is bigoted, especially when it comes to misogyny and following patriarchal ideals, but when it comes to charlie, he doesn't really exude that kinda idea at all, maybe not even to the same extent as the other men. he's seen as the more open and comfortable in his masculinity, not really trying to be this macho man that he knows he can't be. he's very open with being effeminate, not afraid to question gender, and wouldn't mind partaking in roles that are specifically meant to be for women. (he even crossdresses for fun and to go to the bathroom). this could just be because alot of sunny fans like to headcanon him as non-binary/trans (which i also do as well), i think it could go deeper than that.

now, ofc with that being said, the others in the gang sometimes don't follow the same rules they put on for themselves (dennis wears makeup, mac's motherly nature, frank able to express his emotions with others, dee's camaraderie with other women at times) but it's usually one-off moments and sometimes doesn't even last a season, while charlie's like this (from what i know) throughout the whole show.

idk i just really like always sunny and the show is incredibly gay once u start digging for it and i like the charlie headcanons alot so yeah. sorry if this didn't make sense. i will probably do a remake of this when i actually finish the show but who knows. lemme know what y'all think

[ms-hells-bells]

idk why the dog discourse is back again, but as someone that both lives in a country with high levels of pitbull/staffie ownership and interacts daily with dog owners and dog issues in my volunteer work, they aren't just randomly violent for no reason with good guardians who are shocked that it happened. the way people treat pitties here is fucking horrible, because they have the rep/stereotype of guard dogs or attack dogs, people who are lower class, close to or in gangs, use drugs, or are just hypermasculine get those male dogs, DON'T DESEX THEM (so, more aggression), don't properly train them, but scream at and beat them, because they think that's what will 'toughen' a pittie up and make them attack dogs. 99% of the time it does not, they just become miserable recluses, super withdrawn and fearful (most dog attacks are NOT out of anger or territory based aggression, they're fear aggression, when the dog feels extremely scared, and doesn't see a way out, and the human (often a child) ignores the warnings, like growling, showing teeth, certain poses, etc. another one is food/possession aggression, where their trauma and lack of proper training means that they cannot cope with people in their space and taking their things. you'll see bites at children who grab food from their dog bowls).

but they still love their owners, i have lost count of the amount of times, literally more than the fingers on my hands, i have seen men scream at, kick, punch, etc. their intact male pitbulls (not legal in nz unless a licenced breeder btw, but still a widespread issue), and the dogs still get excited and wag their tails, and want to play whenever the man comes back from work or whatever, they still seek touch and affection. it's just horrible, i have aided in someone else....disappearing a dog to a better life not exactly legally, that was treated like this because the spca wouldn't do shit, unless there's a dead or gravely injured animal, and people physically saw the owner/s do it, they don't care. those dogs have so often been abused from 10 weeks old, and they still seek love. very rarely some are so mentally damaged that they DO attack someone, and unfortunately they get put down, which i have complicated feelings about, but that's a different topic, i won't get into it in this post.

but yeah, you abuse a dog, don't train a dog, and destroy a dog's sense of safety, of course they are gonna be at a higher risk of aggression, because they have ptsd, they are traumatised and in constant fear of harm. and i do believe that there is a biological element due to the bite force of pitties and similar dogs, as well as breeding for specific personality traits. but we also see so many bites (far more than pitties and other large dogs) from small dogs, they just can't cause deaths or usually severe injuries because they are small, but they are attacking for the exact same reasons; fear and lack of training. so many people just have zero respect for other living beings. it's why i'm against breeding and domestication as a whole, because we just completely fuck with their lives for our own benefit. pitbulls as a species should not exist, just like near every other dog on earth apart from wild ones (that do include domestic species, but very quickly become just 'mixed' dogs). which is a similar opinion to many ANTI-pitbull people, but i come at it from an angle of empathy (as well as applying it to all dogs, we should not be breeding 'the perfect pet'). they didn't ask to be here and be treated so cruelly.

i'm not gonna reply to any responses to this trying to argue. i have posted about this before and had all those arguments. i know the statistics, i know the biology, psychology, and i have real world first hand experience. you are not fighting with me on my opinion on this.