#idk it's just a genre that's never appealed to me

[terrainofheartfelt]

is it because i'm getting older and gayer or is there really a surge of self-help books happening around me? and am i a curmudgeon to say that they're bullshit?

[themuseofbaroque]

astro obvs. & notes #1 - general

author’s note - this is for entertainment purposes only, none of this is fact. these are simply my own opinions!

- neptune 1H 🤝 pisces rising, noticing their eyes first. the water influence to these placements adds something that draws you in like a current, no pun intended. i used to work with a pisces rising, and she literally looked like a pretty fish (lmfao) big, shiny eyes. either of these placements can find it incredibly easy to appear sensual or seductive.

- speaking of water placements! i’ve also noticed pisces placements tend to take a lot of pictures around water. beaches, hot tubs, rivers.

- this can also be said for air signs (esp. libra) but with things they enjoy! i’m always seeing personal interest posts from libras, aquarians and geminis. music, video games, political causes, shows they’re watching, food, celebrities, etc. anything they like, they post. anything.

- i’ve never laughed harder than when i’m with people who have heavy gemini, capricorn, sagittarius and leo placements

- in my personal opinion and experience, capricorn risings are what people think scorpio rising is. i’ve only met one scorpio rising irl (that i know of) and she did not fit martian/plutonian ruling at all. celebrity examples ⬇️

kim hongjoong of ateez. the intimidation factor, the style, sex appeal, the interest in piercings/tattoos. he’s a capricorn rising, with his chart ruler, saturn, in the sign of aries so we see a lot of red/martian influence from him as well.

megan fox. she’s been a little fuckin weird ever since she dated mgk (that man makes me physically ill to look at much less read about) but! she had her bad bitch moments! being known primarily for her sex appeal + starring in jennifer’s body (a gothic treasure btw) i feel is very scorpio coded however she herself is a capricorn rising, with a sagittarius saturn in the 11h, more fire influence from her as well just like with hongjoong.

joan jett. THEE female guitarist of the 80s. her whole career was surrounded by sex, scandals, drugs, all the darker themes of rock n roll in general. she’s another fire ruled capricorn rising and a sagittarius saturn in the 11h like megan. her style and even her personality has an edge to it, much more fitting for scorpio/plutonian stereotypes rather the capricorn ones. imo.

- actors who’ve done major/recognizable roles in horror usually have a capricorn neptune. neptune is imagination and capricorn is ruled by the devil card in tarot. combine the two and you have quite literally = dark imagination. celebrity examples ⬇️

mia goth staring in the X series as the main face of the trilogy

bill skarsgard being the main face of the IT remake as pennywise

evan peters as tate langdon in AHS, he also played jeffery dahmer recently for netflix.

- capricorn actually shows up quite a bit in the horror genre, esp. gore and paranormal. both actors and writers.

- sagittarius too, oddly enough. a lot of well known faces of horror have major sagittarius placements/stelliums/jupiter dominance.

- underdeveloped cancer placements are more manipulative and two faced than geminis. i see so much gem slander on here, and don’t get me wrong, i love both cancer and gemini placements! however i’ve met and befriended quite a few of both, and cancers by far have been the common denominator in issues around them more than once. stirring the pot then turning around and playing the victim when people are frustrated, lying, playing both sides to better their own situation, and even playing people against each other. i’ve never seen such hateful behaviors from the geminis i know irl.

- aries men are much shyer compared to the women

- taurus women i’ve met irl get pregnant very easily. venus? good coochie? idk

- grand trines are some of the most beautiful people i’ve ever seen (a grand trine is when someone’s big 3, so sun/moon/rising, are in the same element but in all 3 different signs. ex: virgo sun, taurus moon, capricorn rising)

- queer individuals with pisces placements can pass as straight pretty easily if they wanted to. most of them are chameleons

- aries risings i’m so sorry for the household you had growing up. i see martian childhoods usually being the ones who dealt with screaming matches, toxic parents, poverty and underlying issues with siblings that last into adulthood

- i’m not surprised at all when libra placements tell me they’re in college for a general studies degree because they can’t figure out what they wanna do yet

- a lot of fan favorite female characters in video games are canonically cancers

- if you think your rising sign doesn’t suit you very well, try looking at whatever planet correlates with your gender identity. masculine: sun and mars, feminine: venus and moon. the houses and signs of these should help you out a little bit

- libra placements absolutely get favoritism at least once in their life, jobs/family dynamics especially

- sagittarius women usually have rough love lives, at least in the beginning. a lot of them try to save and help partners who don’t deserve it and they get hurt badly in the process. same goes with pisces women

- virgo venus is not that bad of a placement as stereotypes make it out to be. clean freaks? yes. perfectionists? usually, yes. loyal? yes. remember the small things? yes. romantic? no. at least not in a cheesy way. sensual? yes.

- lilith aspects to any of the big 3 is a bad bitch placement. honorable mention is venus/lilith aspects as well

- air signs like spicy food just as much as fire signs

- a lot of rappers have heavy mercurial placements (virgo and gemini) (3h and 6h)

- mc aspecting venus in anyway is usually the person who fools around with coworkers/may even cheat on a partner with someone they work with. most people with this placement have definitely had a partner at one point or another worried about someone they work with. may be the type to have a “work wife”/“work husband”

- 6h chiron is the person who’s life has been majorly impacted by their own or someone else’s health. disabilities, chronic illnesses, stds, limb amputation, skin grafts, etc.

- aries moon and mercury combo = bad potty mouth, cursing is an almost unbreakable habit

- speaking of aries! aries and aquarius placements together in any of these ➡️ moon, venus, mars, lilith, pluto ➡️ usually have a tendency to jump around from partner to partner very quickly, including falling back into exes. their thoughts and opinions on people and things change SO quickly that they usually are the kind of people who have rosters (unintentionally). they are upfront, they don’t lie or drag anyone along but they do seem to be restless when it comes to romance. even if they don’t physically date a lot, they may often THINK of it, their minds going a million miles a minute

- geminis do not get the rep they deserve for being freaks. not only does the sign traditionally rule the throat/lungs/hands/nervous system, (choking, breath play, hickies, hand fetish/fingering, blindfolding and sub/dom dynamics) but it’s also ruled by the lovers card in tarot 👁️👁️

- fixed signs 🤝 tattoos

- sagittarius/capricorn/pisces/libra placements usually have issues with religion/spirituality growing up. either they were forced into one as kids and they have an unhealthy relationship with their god now as an adult or they simply struggle to find something that feels true to them. this is just my experience but every single friend i’ve had who’s left the christian church, had an interest in paganism/buddhism, joined the satanic temple, grew up as strict catholics, etc, have had these placements. religion is a revolving door for them and it’s a common subject of struggle in their life

- women with pisces placements tend fall into unhealthy relationships very easily, especially if they’re heterosexual and dating men. they fall in love with the idea of love before the actual person presenting it. they are bossed around very easy and usually don’t like confrontation. honorable mentions for this as well: pisces stellium, cancer stellium/mercury/saturn, 7h saturn

- cheesy hallmark movies make me think of taurus/libra venus placements, 7h venus as well

- 5h cancer/moon/venus, cancer rising/moon dom, 5h/8h synastry aspects please be wary of accidental pregnancies! wrap it before you tap it cause y’all extra fertile 💀

- most well known streamers/youtubers have 10h stelliums, including their venus. a lot of them will end up dating another social media presence/someone who shares a platform/job with them

yay first post! pardon any spelling errors i’m proof reading this half asleep ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ

[venusacrossthestars]

sharp or dull

pairing- Lando Norris x fem!reader

summary- Lando has begged you to stream with him, you will on one condition- it has to be an ASMR stream

wc- 1.7k

a/n: I wrote this in one sitting bc I cooked this up as a nighttime scenario, because I am an ASMR hoe, hope you enjoy! I also tried something a little new, I added the 'chat' section of the stream, you'll see what I mean. idk if I'm a fan of it or not.

f1 masterlist

Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response, or better yet known as ASMR, had taken TikTok, YouTube, and nearly every other social media platform by storm. To you, ASMR was a calming and relaxing way to unwind after a long day. And as an ASMR-artist you were constantly trying to find new ways to bring that experience to your viewers

Lando, however, could never understand the appeal of ASMR. He didn’t find it relaxing, calming, or anything of the sorts. He much preferred to fall asleep in pure silence, maybe the sound of a fan once in a while. While he didn’t understand it that didn’t mean he didn’t support you and your ‘art’. 

“Babeeee,” Lando whined. 

“What?” 

“Stream with me, pleaseeeee.” 

You rolled your eyes for what felt like the hundredth time. Lando had been begging you for days to with him. Why? Well, when you asked him his exact words were, “Because I get lonely.”  And while you loved Lando, sitting there while he played whatever random game he could find just to keep him company, did not sound appealing. 

“Landoooo,” you draw out in response to his whining. 

“Baby please,” he begs again, “I’ll even let you choose what we do, I swear.” 

A lightbulb goes off in your head. “Anything?” 

“Yes?” He replies, curious to your response. 

Your face breaks out into a grin, “And you promise you’ll do it.” 

Lando takes a big gulp, “What are you planning woman?” 

“Promise?” You hold out your pinky and shake it at him, awaiting his answer. 

He takes your pinky in his, “Promise.” 

Its a week later when Lando is finally able to stream and you couldn’t be more excited. You still haven’t told your boyfriend of your plans. 

“Babe, what are we doing? I need to know so I can set up.” 

“Don’t worry about setting any of your games up. We are going to be doing something else,” You tell him. 

Lando shoots you a confused look, “Care to let me in that pretty head of yours.” 

You giggle, “Well since you said we can do anything of my choosing we will being doing an ASMR stream!” You throw out your hands excitedly. 

Lando looks less than thrilled, “No.” He says flatly. “I meant like you could pick out the game or a challenge. I am not doing ASMR.” 

“You should’ve specified the terms then Norris. And if I am remembering correctly you pinky promised on ‘anything’, can’t go back on that.” 

“Babe I'm not doing ASMR.” 

“Fine then you can stream by yourself.” You cross your arms across your chest and give Lando a pointed look, you were not backing down. 

“No.” 

“You wouldn’t even have to do anything! I would be doing all of it!” 

“No.” 

“Not even a head massage?” 

“No.” 

“Not even sharp or dull?” 

This is when you know you have him hooked. Lando can tell everyone that he doesn’t care for ASMR, that he doesn’t find it relaxing, all that jazz. But you know something they don’t. You know that this man is a sucker for the ‘sharp or dull’ genre of ASMR, and since Lando has sworn you to secrecy you were unable to share this juicy piece of information with the world. 

“... fine, I am only doing this because I love you.” 

As Lando was setting up the stream you were busy gathering your supplies that were spewed about Lando’s streaming room, which at times doubled as your recording studio when you filmed for your YouTube channel. 

Lando went live, muting his mic while being black-screened. You could see the comments flooding the chat:

landonorizzzzzzz- LANDO STREAMMMMMMM pizzaparty124003- about time!! we were in a drought! carlando4lifeeee- HE”S BACK FROM WARRRRR justaninchident- WE CAN”T SEE YOU papayaboyzzz- LANDOOOOOOOOO

Lando unmutes his mic, “I know you can’t see me chat.” 

You whack his arm, “Lando, be nice.” 

carlando4lifeeee- IS THAT WHO I THINK IT IS???? landoandy/naremyparents- MOTHER IS HERE justaninchident- DEFEND ME MOTHER PLEASEEEEE sofishdicatedaf- OMG WE ARE GETTING A Y/N AND LANDO STREAM??

Lando finally turns on the camera and chat continues to lose their mind, “Yes chat, Y/N is here.” 

You wave at the camera, “Hiiiiiii!” 

“Do you want to tell them what we are doing today or do want me?” 

“I can tell them. Chat, today we are doing something I am a literal professional at.” Lando rolls his eyes, “Don’t roll your eyes at me mister, you begged me for a literal week to stream with you.” 

landoandy/naremyparents- HE BEGGED HER TO STREAM WITH HIM?!?!!  y/nismymotherfrfr- RELATIONSHIP GOALS papayaboyzzz- lol simppppppp

You glance at chat, laughing at their reaction, “Yes, he’s been begging for me to do this for a long time! I only agreed once he pinky promised that we could do whatever I want. And I chose,” you pause in suspense, “to do ASMR on my lovely boyfriend.” 

“Yay,” Lando says enthusiastically. 

“Stop. You are going to love it.” 

“If you insist.” 

You launch into explanation, “So as some of you know I run an ASMR account on YouTube and TikTok and today I’ll be doing a couple different ‘triggers’ on Lando.” 

“A couple? I only agreed to one,” he interrupts you. You shoot Lando a pleading look and it takes only a few seconds before he is admitting defeat. “Fine, only a couple though.” He glances at the screen where the chat is displayed, “Call me a simp all you want, at least I have a girlfriend to simp over.” 

“Chat, don’t mind him, he only found out what I wanted to do like 20 minutes ago. But as I was saying before I was rudely interrupted is that I’ll be doing a couple different ‘triggers’ that are pretty popular amongst my audience such as- sharp or dull, head massage, hair brushing.” 

After your explanation you get up from your seat and gather your supplies as Lando messes with the camera and mic. 

“Lan, can you scooch back just a tad?”

“Hmm? Oh, of course baby.” 

“Thank you,” you give him a small kiss on the crown of his head.

“So I am going to start of with the head massage and hair brushing first,” you explain to chat, moving to speak in your softer, slower tone that you use while filming, “Then for the grand finale I’ll do the sharp or dull.” 

Lando always turned to putty when you played with his hair, you weren’t expecting this to be any different, well minus the fact that a bunch of fans were watching. At first you weren’t sure if the mic was even picking up on any of noise but one quick glance at chat seemed that they were all enjoying it. For multiple reasons, you were sure of it. 

After five-or-so minutes of head scratching you decide to check in on your completely silent boyfriend. “Still doing okay baby?” You ask, voice nearly a whisper. 

“Yeah, I’m doing great,” Lando response at full Lando volume. 

papayaboyzzz- MY EARSSSSSS sofishdicatedaf- tell me why I had my volume all the way up and this man decided to talk FULL VOLUME WHAT THE HELL LANDO ass-mr- this man has no idea how to asmr asmrismycrack- no bc why? his gf is literally an asmr PRO

You chuckle at the comments, “Baby you have to be quiet.” 

“What? Why?” He turns around, looking at you confused. 

“Because having people talk loudly, or practically screaming in your case, isn’t really relaxing to listen to.” 

“Oh, sorry,” Lando drops his voice to a much quieter tone, giving you a sheepish smile. 

“That’s okay baby.”

You go move through a couple other triggers, and around the 20-minute mark you decided to wrap things up, “Ok, since I don’t want to bore all of you we are going to move onto the sharp or dull. Then, I don’t know, maybe a Q and A or something.” 

Once again you explain the sharp or dull concept to Lando and the chat, “By the way chat this is Lando’s favorite genre.” 

“Lies, I don’t watch ASMR.” 

“You’re the only one telling lies. You love sharp or dull ASMR, it’s the only one you watch.” 

“Babeeee,” Lando whines, “You were sworn to secrecy.” 

You shrug your shoulders, “Whoops.” 

“Now no one will think I’m cool.” 

“I don’t think you needed any help with that.” Lando looks at you offend that you would say such a thing, you grab his head and turn his face back to the camera. “Okay close your eyes and tell me if this is sharp or dull,” 

You alternate between poking Lando's face with the Q-tip or the toothpick that you have in your hand. Lando gets every guess correct but as you go on you can tell by how his voice gets quieter that he is getting more and more tired. Maybe doing this stream late at night wasn't the best idea. 

“Ok, I think that’s enough.” 

Lando groans at his cut off, “Chat I don’t think I’m gonna make it.” 

You giggle at his sleepiness, “Next time we can do something you want, but for now I think it’s time for bed.”

Lando hums in agreement, “Goodnight everyone! Thanks for tunning in!” 

You wave at the camera, “Goodnight!!” 

Lando shuts down the stream along with his PC and slumps in his chair, “What did you do to me. I’m ready to pass out.” 

“It’s the magic of ASMR.” 

“Fine, I guess it was the magic of ASMR,” Lando sighs out.

“Does that mean you like it now?” You ask, pulling him out of his chair. 

Lando collapses against you, his arms wrap around you as the two of you waddle towards the bathroom. “I only like it when you do it. That’s it.” 

“I’ll take it.” 

The two of you brush your teeth in silence, you watch as Lando can barely keep his eyes open. His sleepiness at your ASMR was a compliment in the highest regards. Lando reattaches himself to your back as you make your way into your shared bedroom. 

As you climb under the covers and reposition yourself in Lando’s arms you can feel his breathing steady out. 

“Babe?” He whispers. 

“Lan?” 

“You meant what you said?” 

“Meant what?” 

“That we could do whatever I want next time you come and stream with me?” 

“Well, anything within reason.” 

“Promise,” Lando wiggles his pinky.

“Promise,” you whisper back, interlocking his pinky with yours.

taglist- (crosses out names mean I couldn't tag you)

@arieslost @customsbyjcg-blog @gr1mes-cc @styl1shl1v @landoscardotcom @poppyflower-22 @blancastans @katiezdiarysblog @mrsstylez @jamieeboulos @xfuckoffx @motkanykodas @emi0358 @ab-127 @alrightysyaphrodite @sya-skies @liacoresstuff @leathersuitrry @travelingece1995 @kageyamas-milk @ugfuchvvvz @jupooo @alex0808 @caleysblog @jess-wither @cassymendezz164445 @rattiefattie69 @sadisticfries @lou-larcher5 @harrietstylinson7 @inlovewithdeadboys @rickyrivera11 @cleverpeachheropersona @loveyatopluto @elysyannemimi @arayofsunshineme @lilyevanswhore @slaygirlbossworld @jupooo @heyheyheyggg @eringaitskill

[winwintea]

stop posting about BALLER - zhong chenle

PAIRING ↬ boyfriend!zhong chenle x reader

GENRES ↬ pure crack idk... fluff, romance, some angst if you look in between the lines, chenle loves basketball more than you. unfortunately.

AUTHOR'S NOTE ↬ inspired by a fic i read on ao3, a tiktok i watched where op got mad at their boyfriend for having headphones in while making out, plus my post here. and also chenle's recent fanboying activity in la. ignore the title its a placeholder for now, in honor of my dear friend @syatchy london stop writing for chenle challenge

WORD COUNT ↬ 1.3K

Everyone had their hobbies. You knew your boyfriend liked basketball, you just didn’t realize he liked it that much. 

Making it your life’s goal to win over the heart of Zhong Chenle, you spent countless hours studying quizlet flashcards, watching a couple of basketball games, even trying to learn the sport as well. Although you were surprised when it didn’t take more than a few dates for you to begin dating. 

Your best friend Ning Yizhuo, on the other hand, had other ideas. 

“I just think he’s a big red flag. Who the hell puts “I’m always ballin’” as their twitter bio?” She’s sprawled across your bed, mindlessly stalking your boyfriend’s social media accounts. “What if your man loves another man more than he loves you?” 

You’re paying her no mind, working on a basketball basics test on your laptop. Eight teams from each of the league's two conferences qualify for the playoffs. The top two teams play each other in the conference finals, to determine the Conference Champions from each side. The winners then play in the NBA Finals. 

Yizhuo suddenly stands up, “Hello? Earth to Y/N? Are you ignoring me?” You’re about to answer your next question, until she starts waving her hands in your face.

“What the hell, Yizhuo?” You turn around annoyed. “I was locked in!”

“Studying for basketball is crazy… Just warning you Y/N. Don’t come crying to me when your boyfriend calls you Stephen Curry’s name instead of your own.” 

You punch her in the shoulder, “I swear to god-” 

But Yizhuo seemed unfazed by your attacks, continuing on, “I’m just saying from experience hon. Sports guys like him will never love you as much as he loves his balls.”

“Um.. that’s what she said.”

—

Despite Yizhuo’s warnings and what she seemed so sure of, you and Chenle clicked in a way that none of your exes ever did. If he invited you to the gym, you’d show up with a yoga mat, pretending to do Pilates while sneaking glances at him bench pressing. If Chenle said he was hungry, you’d learn how do use a frying pan, determined to whip up something edible. And if he asked you to come over, you’d throw on your best outfit, adding an extra touch of appeal, and never forget to bring a treat for Daegal.

Spending time with Chenle was easy. It seemed almost too easy, that you began to slightly question why everything seemed so perfect. 

If there were any red flags like Yizhuo pointed out, it was probably too small to see in the mix of fun times you spent together.

Times spent together usually and often ended with the two of you cuddling or making out on his couch. 

Unsurprisingly, Chenle was a really good kisser. Plus, he was good at cuddling. You had no doubts in that moment you laid eyes on him, but everything was certainly up to expectations. He knew exactly how to hold you in his arms and make you feel like you were on top of the whole damn world. 

As you leaned in closer for another this time, your hands running through his hair, you took notice of his features. His incredibly sharp jawline (mewing tutorial when?), the flushed pink splashed across his collarbones up to his cheeks, and now that he grew out his hair longer, it was much harder to see the shape of his ears-

Hold on.

You blink and then squint your eyes for a couple of seconds, hoping you’re just imagining things.

“Chenle. Are those Airpods?”

Chenle immediately pushes you off of him and then freezes.

You see every single emotion flash through Chenle’s eyes, but he’s still speechless. You’d honestly thought you’d been through the entire spectrum of men in your life, from guys who had memes tattooed on their chest to guys who brought their mother to dates to guys with an extremely interesting savior complex, but nothing could’ve prepared you for this.

Relax. You still had your dignity to protect. “What… are you listening to?” Maybe he was into listening to music while making out, maybe some relaxing sounds people used to cope with traumatic intimate experiences??? You were thinking of anything at this point, trying to brace yourself for the absolute worse. 

“Highlights” Chenle begins, looking at you nervously, “For uh, for the Warriors game.” Before you can even process the info, Chenle rambles on, “We’re so so close to a wild card spot and I wanted to turn the game on earlier, but you were talking about your project you were working on and I really wanted to listen, and right now it’s not like we’re talking about anything important, so I figured it might be alright if I-“

what the fuck… yeah shut the hell up right now please, you think as he keeps rambling, and turn around to grab a pillow behind to smack this big headed shit right in the head. 

“Ow-“ Chenle throws his hands up in defense, trying to block the pillow that comes crashing down. “What? Hey!”

“Zhong Chenle. I’m going to chop your fucking dick off.”

—

In the end, Chenle’s dick remains intact. 

After letting himself get beaten up by a pillow, he manages to get you to calm down, taking the airpods out, which makes you a little bit happier than you were before. 

Chenle leaves you on the couch to take a shower, allowing you to ponder for a bit. Were you being too restricting this way? Chenle seemed to still care about you, and didn’t want to take away time from your own interests as well. I mean… maybe you needed to get into basketball as well to fully understand. 

As you lounge on the couch, scrolling aimlessly through Pinterest, you hear the faint sound of the shower turning off. Before you know it, Chenle slips onto the couch beside you, his presence warm and comforting. In one smooth motion, he curls himself around you, arms gently wrapping around your waist as his head nestles into the crook of your neck. The familiar scent of the shampoo you gifted him lingers in the air, blending with the soft warmth of his skin. 

Your mind's racing, caught between conflicting emotions. And damn, Chenle smells incredible, which really isn’t helping right now.

A minute of silence passes before he finally speaks, his voice soft but serious. “Look, I get if you’re uncomfortable. I didn’t mean to push any boundaries. If that was too much, I won’t do it again. And if this is something that’s going to be a dealbreaker for us, I get it—we can end things here.”

“No, wait—no,” you cut in, setting your phone aside to face him. “I was just surprised, that’s all.”

Okay, it was weird. You’ll give him that. Maybe his “casual” obsession with basketball wasn’t as casual as you thought. And sure, that might be a red flag for some.

But Yizhuo’s wrong. Maybe Chenle’s got a deeper connection with his basketballs than you or whoever she’s comparing him to, but at least he’s never moaned or called you Stephen Curry in the heat of the moment.

That’s gotta count for something, right?

Yeah, maybe this wasn’t so bad. You could get used to this. Besides, he already promised he wouldn’t do it again.

Your thoughts bounce back and forth, but after a while, you break the silence with a quiet, “Did you win?”

His head lifts from your shoulder instantly, excitement buzzing in his voice. “Yeah, we did! Secured our spot in the conference finals.”

Conference finals. Oh, right. You recognize that term—studied it on Quizlet like the good, supportive partner you are.

You take a deep breath, bracing yourself, swallowing down the nervous lump in your throat. Chenle might be a bit obsessed with the sport, but he was supportive of your own goals and actually a really nice boyfriend. 

“Tell me about it.”

PERM TAGLIST ↬ @lyvhie @aquaphoenixz @galacticnct @ldh0000

[whorediaries-09]

okay but popstar!reader and rockstar!sirius where reader performs a song, and wears sirius' leather jacket while doing it and screams "yes i'm his girlfriend, do what you want with that information"and sirius is SHOCKED or in which reader is in an interview and get questioned abt siri and she's like "he's the love of my lifee" and he is all gooey and melty

eep! i'm sorry i've been inactive, i hope you forgive me. i was on a little trip and also have my exams. anyways, i hope you like what i've written.

smoke on my clothes;

pairing- rockstar!sirius black x popstar!reader warnings- fluff, 18+ content (i had to incorporate it cause its him-) use of y/n (aghhhkdjci4utcisn). let me know if i should add more a/n- okay so i mixed both the ideas like-um- idk how to explain, you'll see.

the slut club

lovelorn and nobody knows love thorns all over this rose

he was known for his notorious dating history. he was known for his "sex appeal". he was known for cigarettes after sex. he was known for his black leather jackets. he was known for his distinct rough voice, booming through stadiums. and through the years, he had a gained a reputation of being nothing but a man who seemed to a 'playboy' of sorts.

that pushed the media to slut shame him. but what happened behind close walls remained in his memories, and only he knew. while he could usually laugh it off when asked in interviews, he still felt hurt. he wasn't a man of commitment, and whenever he took a woman to his bed, he specified he didn't want any emotional bonding. it was supposed to be just a one night stand.

that was until he met you. you had agreed to collab with him on a project he had been working on. while the both of you rehearsed different genres of music, sirius wanted to experiment with his style a little bit. you were truly a sight to behold, clad in your cream oversized sweater and black jeans when you walked in the studio. there was something so mesmerizing about you, something that truly enchanted him.

that is how you got to know him. the sobs behind his smiles, the addiction behind the smoke on his clothes, the kisses behind his stage. he'd hold your hand under tables, kiss your pretty face stupid in private, he'd braid flowers into you hair. and in the perception of the hues of dark oceans, his gray stormy eyes would melt into your tear flooded haze when his cock was buried into you, hitting spots you'd never knew existed. his well defined abs would be soaked in sweat, lit under the moonlight. his lips would melt into your lips, his fingers pressing into your skin as your walls would clench around his cock, hinting the arrival of your orgasm. he would ghost his fingers at your clit, your moans and screams of his name falling like a cacophony of a melody into his ears. you'd shudder, shake and curl your toes with your breast heaving as you'd come down from your high euphoria, hitting you as he'd paint your walls with his hot white cum. he'd pepper kisses upon your hot skin, murmuring phrases of affection and falling asleep with his arms wrapped around your body.

he was a liquor you could be drunk on. but loving him was like holding a love thorned rose.

****

you wrapped the jacket around your body, hugging it closer, smelling sirius' scent upon you. the interview consisted of the same old questions but you still had to answer them with a faux smile on your face. sirius wondered how you could manage to do it all the damn time.

you shuffled with the cards, reading the tweet by a fan. you looked into the camera,

'so sirius motherfucking black just collabed with y/n? i think i'm about to faint. oh holy lord, they'd be the hottest couple if they dated.'

sirius almost about fainted. bells started ringing in his ears, as his heart thumped against his heart. truly against your wishes and his, the love you had for each other was hidden. once when you had brought it up, he'd laughed it off by saying it would blow up on your pretty face. but deep down he wanted the world to know how amazing you were, and maybe being slut shamed for you, would be worth it, for once. and while you had the image of a sweet popstar, and the world wanted you, it felt like it would be a crime to confine you with him. but his love knew no boundaries. he'd kill for you, he thought when you were so accepting of him and his flaws when he revealed that he was so 'imperfect'.

he gripped on the edge of his table, his knuckles almost turning white when you opened your mouth to answer. you smiled, holding up a finger as you did so.

'actually he is the love of my life,'

the sentence slipped so casually from your lips, as you proceeded with the tweets and questions. if he could, he'd hug you. but you were behind a screen on his phone. he felt wanted, accepted and desired. without his realization tears pooled into his eyes. he felt loved.

because you didn't care about the smoke adorned on your clothes. you didn't care about getting lovesick all over your bed. you didn't care about handprints in wet cement. you didn't care about that he was rose with thorns. you were truly drunk in love, and maybe it would be worth it even for once if it blew up on your pretty face.

[eluxcastar]

The One and Only

── ୨୧：arlecchino x reader

୨୧﹑synopsis :: a collection of moments from Arlecchino's recollections of the former Harbinger

୨୧﹑genre :: Idk actually

୨୧﹑content :: fem reader, reader is a harbinger, not proofread

୨୧﹑words :: 2.8k

threw this together on a whim because I missed these two I realised it's been like nine months since I wrote one of repetition I was like I wanna play around with these people in their dynamic. you don't have to necessarily have read one of repetition for it to make sense I don't think but I have a bad habit of assuming people know things they don't so take that with a grain of salt

one of repetition

Snezhnaya has never been immune to the curse of rumours that run rampant among its people. Some spread like wildfire and others die out before they gain enough traction to matter. When they somehow manage to make their way to the House of the Hearth, it matters—Mother is liable to find out, and that's when it's revealed whether or not she spread them herself.

There have never been more rumours about anyone but the first Harbinger. Arlecchino realised that when she was young.

They tell the daring tales of a tyrant decorated in well-worn armour able to bring the nation to its knees at their feet with nothing more than a pyro vision and a claymore.

Many of the kids at the House share the same sentiment. Brighella is terrifying, and though they'd like their approval, they never want to meet them. The few who have met them say they're weird.

Supposedly the child of the Tsaritsa, you have been tainted by the ever-waining loveless God of Snezhnaya and become little more than a heartless warmonger seeking absolution. You have not even removed your helmet in three centuries nor shown your face. You are fussy, childish, impulsive and arrogant like your whole reign of tyranny is a giant temper tantrum, and you'll only stop once you've realised the nation that has been dwindling ever so gradually will one day be reduced to a wasteland.

Maybe then, the ashes left behind by the fire you let tear apart this icy world will be your single lesson.

Arlecchino meets you for the first time at the celebrations for her ascendance to her Mother's position. Every Harbinger gathers at the behest of the Tsaritsa, an important event demanding their presence. All nine others and the Director are called to return, and along with them, you appear clad in armour, even on a formal occasion. You are feared, yes, but undoubtedly lavished in praise and feigned respect meant only to appease you. People seek to impress you because you are the first, an immortal Harbinger with the nation under their thumb.

Though foolish, she finds she cannot help but be swept up in the glory of it all, the appeal of having a warmonger's approval if only because it feels like the only good sign she'd ever get. Her ascendence is not born of admiration, merely convenience, a way to escape her Father and gain power. She is young and inexperienced and fills the shoes of her Mother with the grace of a newborn fawn. For just a moment, she could revel in receiving your praise, then go right back to indulging the bitterness she associates so heavily with your name. Whatever you have that sends shivers to the very core of grown men, she wants it, and having you pay some attention to her feels right. It cannot keep her from detesting you for possessing it.

You touched her shoulder once with an unnaturally warm gloved hand—a silent congratulations, she tells herself—it is the only way to justify her racing heart as you lean down and speak barely above a whisper. "Do no disappoint me, Arlecchino."

Everything takes a backseat as a fire is lit in the pit of her stomach, the drive to wipe that infuriating smirk she knows is hidden beneath your mask off your face. If she didn't know better, she could almost convince herself you thought you owned her.

For all her staring, however, she can't recall another moment of that night you spared her more than a single glance in her direction before turning away. It was Pierro who pinned Arlecchino's delusion to her chest and welcomed her, the Director, not the Tsaritsa's child. You merely took it upon yourself to congratulate her— professionally— as any colleague would.

The first time Arlecchino saw your face, she could not believe her eyes. You lack the odd companion she has long grown used to seeing by your side. She does not even recognise you at first, sitting in a chair in Pierro's quarters in plain clothes, your helmet discarded at your feet. In your hand is a glass, the liquid inside sloshing as you motion with your hand in some general direction amid your conversation.

It almost makes her uncomfortable to see, like staring down at your severed head pathetically rolling back and forth under the sole of your boot as you entertain yourself with it. It does not roll far before the adornments resist, and you don't fight them, instead rolling it back. Your only response to her gawking is to quirk your eyebrow at her.

You regard her with curiosity, though she would be remiss not to notice the glint in your eyes. "Arlecchino," you say, perhaps some mockery of greeting her.

Since she met you, her poker face has only gotten better, though her short pause is a dead giveaway that she has to think to recall your title. She still does not quite believe the woman she sees is you. "Brighella."

A smile tugs at your lips, and another sip of the drink in your glass marks your second pause. "Are you lost, or did I interrupt something?" you ask, though you turn to Pierro for the answer to the question.

Arlecchino takes a breath, determined not to let you get away with speaking to her that way without seeing any bite— "I called her," Pierro interrupts her before she can even say a word, and your eyes flicker back to her.

"I'll take my leave then," you say, gathering your things. You hook your fingers under your helmet and pick it up like nothing is wrong, as if you don't notice how Arlecchino stares and tries to remind herself that it should be obvious someone was under there. 

The only thing that helps her remind herself nobody else could sport that cocky smirk in Pierro's office without receiving a cold glare. He merely watches as you down the rest of your drink in one mouthful and leave the glass for him on his desk before stalking off. You stop only to put your helmet back on.

There's a sigh once you leave the room, and Pierro silently collects the glass.

The second time Arlecchino meets you, it is more arranged: a trip down the halls leads her to a stray fatuu bearing a message for her. You want to see Arlecchino in your chambers. There's no indication of why, and the man delivering the message had no inclination to ask before scurrying off. She cannot even say she blames him. She's seen the way you speak to the lesser fatuus before.

Arlecchino arrives in the corridor to hear the unusual noises in your room. It is like someone is rummaging through your belongings with reckless abandon and tossing whatever is in their way aside. 

She eyes the door with particularly harsh scrutiny. If there is an intruder, rifling through your room is the most effective way to get things they might want, and she can't allow them an opportunity to escape.

That is until Arlecchino hears your voice from inside, and you exaggerate a frustrated groan. You sound on the verge of tearing your hair out.

Then she braces herself to knock, and the room falls starkly silent as you register someone is standing outside.

"Who's there?" You pose the question like an accusation despite having to know you would have guests. You invited her, after all— demanded her, really.

Through gritting teeth, she finds the will to bite her tongue and say nothing about your attitude rearing its ugly head again. You find a way to always be like this. The moment she gains some semblance of understanding of your motives, you screw it up by acting superior again, like you genuinely believe the world should fall helplessly at the mercy of your whims and run as you will it to. 

"It's Arlecchino," she responds, the animosity she wishes to show neatly tucked away beneath a layer of barely cordial stoicism.

"Oh," is the only sound from inside, followed by footsteps and a light thud as if you place something down, perhaps one of the things it sounded like you were moving. "Are you alone?" 

For a moment, she almost began to wonder if you had forgotten her.

The question confuses her. "Yes."

"You may enter. The door is unlocked."

Arlecchino does not waste another moment before she opens the door to greet your unmasked face. This time, she recognises you from the pattern of your scars to the odd look on your face, though the off feeling staring into your eyes gives her strikes immediately with the same confusing force. 

It should be less jarring the second time, and yet, as she slowly closes the door behind her, she cannot help but scan the room in search of your helmet.

Your room is a damn mess, probably because you just tore it apart for reasons beyond her. She spies your helmet discarded by the bed on its side, hollow and lifeless and so unlike she usually sees it perched atop a suit of armour brimming with self-assured grandiose.

"I was worried he'd followed you all the way here."

She grasps at who you're implying almost immediately, yet can't say she understands why. It can't be anyone but the man in armour you brought back from the abyss who follows you around like a stray puppy. 

"Are you referring to the—" she also realises she has no idea what it is that follows you around— "man you took in...?"

"Yes." You answer without notice for her apprehension, or perhaps so used to it that it no longer seems worth commenting on. "He has a habit of stealing faces, and though I already told him he can't have mine, he's determined to get it."

Stealing...faces...?

"You're probably wondering why I wanted to speak with you." All too quickly, you change the subject, jumping from whatever you just said to a completely different train of thought as you turn away from her to find something amidst the clutter on your dresser. Your body obscures her view, unable to see what you're doing.

She saves you the discomfort of having a hole burned into your back from her gaze, instead taking the opportunity to look around. Do you always live in this dump? In a way, it's not hard to believe; your behaviour is reminiscent of a spoiled child who never learned to clean up their messes, yet she expected you would treat your living space with the same methodical attention as your subordinates.

"It wasn't included alongside your message," she responds absently, merely engaging because she must. Her mind is occupied, overlooking the pile of armour dumped on the floor like junk metal.

You place a glass down behind her as you speak, the sound unmistakable to her ears, compounded by the sound of something pouring. "Intentionally. You would never have come if you knew why I wanted to see you."

She cannot help but glare at the back of your head. "Is that so?"

"Indeed."

When you turn to her, she cannot help the way her attention draws to the two glasses in your hands—glasses you have no doubt filled with alcohol. Pantalone taught her such a trick not long after he became a Harbinger, and she has not a single doubt that you learned it from him as well.

While your company isn't paying attention, fill a glass and offer it to them. It's rude to refuse once it's been poured. It'll keep them put.

It didn't occur to her until after you extended the glass in your left hand to her that she realised you had trapped her in the conversation should she strive to maintain her pleasant façade. Her fist clenches tightly at her side, nails digging into her palm with a sharp pain.

Arlecchino takes the glass with a tight smile, a wordless exchange. The look in your eyes tells her you know it, too.

"I hope you didn't bring me here for a frivolous venture." Her own warning, one she feels she has earned over the past few minutes.

"No," you say, swirling the liquid in your glass as a means of entertaining yourself. "I simply wanted to observe you."

"How forward." She cannot help it by the time she realises she's said it. There is obviously disapproval in her voice.

Despite her venom, you only smile at her dumbly as if you don't notice the tone of her voice or the furrow of her brows. "Isn't it?" a rhetorical question. You let out a light chuckle at yourself. "It's strange, I thought the one to overtake the Knave would be a little more like that old hag, but it turns out you couldn't be more different if you tried."

This is what you wanted to say?

Arlecchino's eyes narrow. "What do you mean by that?" 

"Oh, come on, are you blind?" Your penchant for mockery shines through your words whether you meant it to or not. "Surely you've noticed by now."

"I don't aspire to become my mother," she retorts just a touch more harshly than she meant to.

"I meant it as a compliment, don't you realise?" you question, "The House has run this way for years because she made it that way. I'm sure many of the children she bought are itching to go home." Your musings lead somewhere—they must—and yet you insist on meandering your way there at a leisurely pace to draw it out. It's as if you wait and watch with eyes filled with curiosity for her to guess, but she makes no attempt to. "Will you return them to their families?"

Arlecchino considered it many times. The thought is appealing. It would be like setting her siblings—now her children—free. She grew up alongside them, played with them as a child and now presides over them.

Wanting to stall, Arlecchino takes a sip from the glass before speaking.

"No," she answers. 

It's not possible. 

If not a monetary figure or tangible reason, it quickly became a stark impossibility when she considered that someone would have to explain why the orphans the Knave had acquired carefully raised were being returned. 

Many would live in harsh conditions, some would die or merely be sold again, and some were too broken down by motherly love to find their peace in the common world again. 

It's not worth the pain of trying.

Something in her answer piques your interest, and she notices your hardly disguised intrigue almost immediately. Years of wearing a helmet to hide your emotions have certainly done a number on how much you are able to hide them naturally. 

"I thought for certain you would say yes."

"You were incorrect."

You quirk an eyebrow at her as if to challenge that idea. "Was I?" you question.

Were you?

"Yes," she says before she can think of anything to disprove that. Time made her aware of the many impossibilities she had spent years fantasising about, but she would not share that with you.

"You're certainly gentler than her," you remark, almost a passing comment as it's quickly overshadowed, "Less of a pain in the ass to talk to as well. I'd have to chase her for days to get her to come talk to me."

Arlecchino suddenly understands why the room is in such a state of disarray—you hadn't expected her. Instead, you were tearing your room apart under the impression you would have days to clean it up before she found her way to you. It seems that punctuality is a burden to you. If nothing else, it's motivation to never be late.

She finds herself aimlessly staring into the glass in her hand, a lesser part of her mind trying to determine what's in it, though too clouded by conflict to place an answer anytime soon. Instead, she stands and listens to whatever you insist on saying, lost in your words and the musings of the past, your unique knowledge of what came before her.

The observations of now the piercing gaze that threatens to spill her soul out before the two of you and dissect it as you please while she watches at the mercy of your rank, the lingering respect that refuses to leave her from years of seeing you as an ideal.

Talking to you is something quite bizarre; knowing you is something even stranger. 

She may never forget the time you spent intrigued by the young orphan who overthrew her mother to take her place at your side as your colleague.

CROSSPOSTED ON AO3

[adventuringblind]

heyyy i have a request but it’s kinda messy so make it in your way

charles and y/n having a fight during their vacation and both being too stubborn to apologize first so they spend an awkward couple of days and then both of them will apologize in the exact same moment cause they just miss each other so so much

idk if this makes sense but i trust u

Stubborn

Charles Leclerc x reader

Genre: angst to fluff

Request: Yes! I am now closing requests to work on some other projects and finish what y'all have sent me :)

Summary: I literally did exactly what the prompt said. I was feeling this the other day tbh.

Warnings: arguments

Notes: written in second person. Short fluffy blurb :)

Masterlist

You and Charles decided a vacation to London would be a fun way to spend your summer break.

The first few days had been filled with fun outings and basking in eachothers presence. It wasn't something you got to do very often. Another reason the situation was incredibly stupid.

Three days in, and you two had gotten into an argument. You can't remember what it was even about. Just that Charles started it, and you were too stubborn to back down.

Now, everything felt awkward. You were supposed to he enjoying your vacation. Not spending it in seperate room because neither of you will apologize.

It hurt like hell. You'd hardly seen Charles in two days. Just in passing where you exchange awkward glances and waves.

He'd left the hotel room a few times. Mostly to get essentials. It was how he processed his thoughts. Outin the open breeze

You, on the other hand, had hardly moved. The idea of fighting never made your body willing to cooperate. You spent your time in bed loathing in your self-pity.

You both knew you were being more stubborn than the Redbulls, and it was starting to get ridiculous.

Charles wanted to spend his vacation with you, and you wanted to be back in Charles arms. Both of you coming to the decision to apologize to the other. A neccecary thing that has to happen for you two to reconcile.

You drag your body out of bed. Wiling it to do as directed. Your eyes puffy from the crying. It's definitely a less then appealing look.

You didn't know Charles had come back yet. You figured you could get water and maybe clean yourself before he had to see you like this.

But when you swung open the door, you were met with a very broken looking Charles. His eyes had dark circles under them, and his eyes held the same look as when his team messed up his strategy.

You two didn't hesitate to fall into each other. Your apologies muffled by your face in his shirt and Charles by his mouth to your hair.

"I don't remember what I was upset about."

"I don't remember either." You meet his eyes now. "Agree to move on?"

"Agreed."

Charles wastes no more time wrapping himself in you. Finally able to move on with your vacation and spend much needed time together.

[arealtrashact]

What is the appeal/what do you like about Saw? I enjoy horror as a genre and have seen people post about saw a lot on here and had the opportunity to watch it so I did. But. I'm kind of confused? what I enjoy about horror is (a lot of different things, some of which are:) the anticipation, the contrast of good, pleasant times and the deeply horrific things which then happen, a plot that is unpredictable even if it's clear it will only end badly, I enjoy not knowing how exactly it will be bad and then the film slowly revealing that to me. Saw did very few of these things. Maybe it's just not a film for me, (I haven't watched many slashers and I can imagine they might be similar and it's just a subgenre I don't understand/am destined not to like?) but even so I just cannot understand what people enjoy about it??? from the get go it's grim and horrific, which means that when things get worse, they never really feel that bad because you have no example of goodness in that universe to compare it to? The characters are. Pretty two dimensional and also not necessarily likeable. Idk I could go on but I don't want to sound like a dickhead who loves the sound of their own voice writing a really critical review of something I don't understand. I feel like with the fanbase it has on this website, I must be missing something. Please enlighten me!!! And if you can't explain it I would love any articles/analyses of the franchise that go some way to explain why people like it if you know of any. Sorry for littering your inbox with this mini essay lol but I watched it last week and I'm still just like. Disappointed and confused and you're the first person on my dash to post something related to it so lucky you, you get to be the receiver of this ask !!! Thank you in advance if you even read this far lol, I'd really appreciate if you could point me in the direction of some kind of explanation !!! No worries if not tho, have a good rest of your week 🌻🧡

I think you had it when you said, 'Maybe it's just not a film for me'. It really is as simple as that.

There isn't always a deeper meaning or some secret detail everyone else who does enjoy it is privy to. There is no magic answer that will enlighten you into the appeal that something holds for certain people.

That being said, you shouldn't feel confused or left out by being perturbed by something as polarizing as Saw lol.

I can't answer for everybody who likes this franchise because I'm sure everyone has different reasons but speaking solely for myself : I like these movies for all the reasons you listed that you don't.

These films are like chicken soup for my soul, and have been since I was about ten years old. They make me laugh, they provide me with catharsis, and ( contrary to your statement) I find the characters very charming. I could wax on about what these movies did for me at that tender age but I am not in the habit of analyzing why I love the things that I do ( I think I'd find some patterns I wouldn't want to acknowledge /coughs/ ). All I know is that when Hello Zepp starts playing at the end of every installment, my heart swells with uncomplicated joy.

[kimberlyannharts]

Ultraman: Rising!

Sure we all know the Power Rangers reboot has been passed on at Netflix but instead we have this hot new piece of toku instead: Ultraman: Rising! And I finally got the chance to check it out last night.

I know Ultraman is one of the big toku/kaiju genre staples but it's never really been on my radar of things to watch. I'm not sure why! I guess Super Sentai/Power Rangers just has more of the it factor that appeals to me. So because of that I really have no context to the story besides it's a guy who can turn into a giant silver superhero that beats up kaiju.........or maybe it's an alien who looks like a human and the silver superhero is his true form? or maybe the human and the silver superhero are two separate beings that share the same body? idk. It's probably all three of those things depending on the series. But this film was marketed as a standalone that new fans could enjoy AND....the big one.....it's ANIMATED, so I felt more inclined to check it out.

And it was really really good!! I enjoyed it a lot!

Spoiler-ish thoughts on the film below:

= Let's get this out of the way: the biggest draw to this was the animation and art direction, and yeah, it slaps. The textures and stylization (always love 2D painted effect animation on explosions and things) and lighting were a full-course meal and the scenes where they focused on Ultraman's shining eyes staring through a window or computer screen were just SO striking. To the point where I feel that if I got around to watching the actual live-action Ultraman, it might feel a little underwhelming in comparison. Oops

= It does kind of fall in the cliches of the "selfish guy learns maturity by having to be a father" plot (with bonus "son is estranged from his dad and mom is missing but they work to improve their relationship" sprinkled in) which makes me appreciate The Return even more (sorry, I'm still Returnpilled) but it's still charming and I can hope if we get more movies they give a little more focus to Ami and Emiko (speaking of which, I know they weren't doing a romance this movie, but Ami having a daughter and the movie being about Ken raising a daughter? oh you know it's happening and I'm here for this because they're both so hot)

= I think Ken is also a better example of the "showboating egotistical hero who learns to mature" than most because the movie isn't afraid to show him vulnerable even before his character development. I was genuinely surprised at that scene where he starts crying out of the stress of balancing his baseball career and figuring out Emi

= Apparently there was some discussion that the movie didn't bring up Ultraman's origins which, as someone who knows next to nothing about Ultraman, that didn't really bother me? Obviously I can still give more benefit of the doubt than people who don't know much about the tokusatsu/kaiju genre to begin with, but even so, I was still pretty down with the concept of "this guy has the ability to turn into a giant silver superpowered man and passed the ability down to his son" - and I think in the age of superhero blockbusters in general the idea isn't that farfetched that it requires more explanation. In any case it's a bit of a moot point since future movies are clearly going to talk about Ultras and their origins more, based on the stinger.

= Is Emi a clear kid-appeal character meant to be shown off in marketing and merchandising because of how squishy and cute she is? Yes. Is she just so fucking squishy and cute and my newest baby child? YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES. I am not immune to monster baby. I think it helps that I always found the old monster screeches cute and applying them to a baby babbling was kinda genius in its execution. And I'm glad they kind of got the obligatory "haha babies poop and are smelly and gross" jokes out of the way early (yeah they had the whole "acid reflux" thing in the second act but I've seen way worse in other media)

= The subtitles calling Sato's Ultra form "Ultradad" and his Ultra mustache were both really funny

= Obviously I knew Ken wasn't going to die when he threw himself on Dr. Onda's mech (btw the mech was sexy) but I definitely expected a little more than just a busted arm with how they were building up how the blast would have "destroyed them all" kdjkfdj maybe they cut to after he had recovered a bit. Though in general I'm not quite sure of how durable Ultraman is

= Kind of a milf. reblog

[j4y-lvr]

day flower … park jongseong

SYNOPSIS. bent over the sink, coughing up petals and blood, you knew that your worst fears had come true.

PAIRING. jay x fem!reader

GENRE. fluff, angst, lovers2?, established!relationship (?), hanahaki au

WARNINGS. profanity, mentions of food, mentions of blood, quite a lot of kissing, possibly making out (?), one mention of loss of weight, graphic, mcd(?), death(?)

WORD COUNT. 5.3k

NOTE. i just wanted to write something sad and i came up with this,, idk why i chose jay to fit my mental image of this bc its so saddening to even imagine— EVEN THOUGH ITS SAD PLS DO READ😭‼ thoughts on an alternative ending? update:: I MADE ONE: !! ALTERNATE ENDING. !!

Reblogs and feedback are highly appreciated!

i. the bud blooms

At the ripe age of 12 you were sent away with your mother after a preceding divorce bought with complexities and the drop of niceties. This, however, was your chance  at a fresh start or whatever your mother bullshited about when you knew you'd nonetheless be a burden to her.

Maybe she was prepping you to put up with her never coming home nor checking up on you as time passed. With no real restrictions you spent your time outside after school and by the field of daffodils you found after a hike up the crest of a low hill.

A google search on the then simplistic site displayed that daffodils symbolise new beginnings, quite accurate given your situation. Much hadn't changed now as only the site was cleaned up to look mod and appealing but the information remained.

On the sole field you met a boy. Dark hair brooding his lowered eyes, and he wore nothing but a tiresome look on his face. He stepped forward and scrunched his nose in annoyance at the sight of  you, an intruder to his scarce peace. "ugh, whatever, just stay on that side of the field and don't disturb me,"  With no one to tell you when to not bother someone, you did exactly that, eventually getting him to gleam a boyish smile at you.

Just like the search engine viewing your answer, that boy, jay, seemed to have an answer for almost everything. Smart and logical, would always rationalise with himself and was punctual with his timings at the gripping age of 13. Not once had he been late when you’d inquire to meet him the very next day, finding him at his usual spot, grimacing at the withered flowers. His punctuality and love for flowers (?) scared you, either he was messed up in the head or he'd been expected to act like an adult for the majority of his life, to live up to his parents expectations.

He wandered to these fields for his lonesome mind to sing to some melody of a song you didn't know, caressing the petals of the varied and wilting flowers. You accompanied him with a sketchbook in hand, your hands at work, your ears to his humming and occasional tunes with no comments or interruptions. You had not a thread attached with his absolute, practical life, and that's what he grew to enjoy as he sang you sweet songs and admired the minimalist beauty of flowers for hours together before he vanished back the trail he hiked up.

A decade long later, he stood the same punctual, intellectual, stellar citizen as his facial features  matured and took a dark yet captivating bloom while he sobered from a teen to a young adult. Now the heir of his grandfather's company, he revelled in the success of his grandfather's business. To say he grew would be an understatement, rarely ever flashing you that lovable boyish grin, never to sing his silly little tunes in front of you again.

You weren't one to pry, years into your first ever relationship with your first love and beyond afraid to lose your loose yet stitched in place frail, threaded red heart the two of you share. The photobook stared upon you, urging you to reminisce about your uneventful past filled with mostly jay. The current times didn't get any exciting either, you painted and attended exhibitions, the usual smile carried on your peach tinted lips at the guests and those interested in buying your pieces.

Contrary to this, jay barely made it home, cooped up in his office all day everyday, allowing himself to come home merely upon completing his work. You didn't mind really, the two of you went out, spoke to each other often, and were happy. This while around, he had been distant for a week or two, his longest record of shutting you out till date. You figured he was exhausted mentally and gave him the space though you wished to circle in his arms and breath wistfully.

You veered your attention to the pages and stopped on one of jay, sat beneath the tree near your old, broken, rundown house, looking into the farther distance, admiring the view, and so were you at the time, etching each feature of his delicately put together face, ingraining it in your mind, taking out your then new but now ancient camera to capture the spectacle.

You grin at the photo stuck, your orbs drifting to the messy lyrics he'd written in english to match the mood of the moment, this particular one that of your favourite song till date, one that he used to sing you to sleep.

"what are you looking so fondly at," uttered jay whose presence you failed to recognise in the room, his exasperated expression making you almost coo at him. You patted on the bedding beside as he followed, crossing your painting that you'd left to dry for hours ere.

"our photo book," you replied gaily, surprised to see him speaking to you after weeks, instinctively reaching for his cheek and staring into his eyes to find the very night sky in them, to find them gleaming right at you, the type stars would beam before they went out. A mesmerising yet sad beauty.

His gaze flickered from your soulful eyes and he glued his sights to the photo and hummed in agreement, "i guess i've always looked this good," he finished the tire in his vocals evident with a slight snicker. You shifted closer to him on the bedding which you wrinkled in the process, "you always have," you completed, pulling him closer by the hand that cupped his cheek.

You drawled yourself up to his level, running your thumb back and forth on his soft skin while your other hand ran through his soft hair, watching as he watched you with this solemn look you couldn't put a finger on. You smiled wider and hovered your lips over his as you ultimately gave in to his alluring presence and pressed your soft lips to his in a desperate yet sweet manner.

He hummed from bewilderment and slinged an arm around your waist, inching the distance closer than possible, tilting his head further and into you as he danced with your lips. You pulled away and gasped, blinking as bliss hit you, wondering if it could get any better than this? You drew away and slotted your lips on his again, covering his frantic yet slow lips, kissing him passionately, emptying out your heartfelt sentiments in the shared motion. 

You climbed off and undid his tie and the first button of his dress shirt and told him to wash up, getting to your feet, fetching him comfortable clothes and a glass of water to drink. He changed into them after washing up and sat back down on the mattress, back pressed to the headboard, the glass coming in contact with his lips that stained yours not long ago.

He glugged the cool water down his throat and set the now empty glass on the bedside table, your hand ruffling his hair as he yearned for your lips to confirm his doubt, tugging down and setting his lips against yours to feel the emotion again as you relaxed into his warm touch after a long day. 

He separated the connection as a string of saliva drew apart and suspended, a sigh of what you thought was content from jay as he flopped to the soft matting underneath him. A pit settled in his stomach and he felt guilt. He chose to ignore the feeling and set his eyes to a close.

You joined him, clinging onto him, kicking on the blanket to yourself and snuggling into his shoulder with a grin. Jay forcefully shut his eyes with a wince he hoped you'd miss it and placed his hand on your waist. Jay pretended to sleep as you hiked up on your elbow, leaning to press a peck to his forehead and mutter, "i love you."

Truth be told, jay sighed out of worry than content.

ii. blossom

You gotten used to the sight of jays absence when you awoke from your prolonged slumber, even the days you rose as early as 8, he’d be out the door, bidding you goodbye as he tucked in the loop of tie and tighten it around the collar, patting you on the head before bolting out the door and zooming off in his vehicle.

He’s been distant but never avoiding, and that's what you felt like he was doing this time; avoiding. As painful as it was to accept the fact that he had been avoiding you for the past week was hurtful. Yes, he was out and at work, he hadn’t stepped foot in the house since a week, nor would he receive your calls, excusing himself through text messages shorter than 5 words.

Time you made him show up yourself. 

You spent almost the entire day prepping your setting, going as far as decorating and cooking something you saw online which ended up pretty decent. Now, all you needed was to lure jay like a wasp to light. You picked up your cell, dialling his number, your throat feeling rather scruffy as you coughed on the ringing line to soothe the uncomfortable sensation.

“did i work too hard for this, i feel my throat closing up,” you mumble, waiting for the line to connect, the mere automated voice blaring through your ear canal causing you to hang up and opt to text him. “come home, its an emergency,”

Not the best, but surely it’d do the trick, and in an hour's time, jay showed up, panting as he bolted the door open, “where's the fire!” he shouted, standing in the common room, across your resting figure on the couch. You yelped and got to your feet, rushing over and placing both hands over your heart, “here.”

His expression morphed from his initial shock to confusion and to anger. He should've seen it coming as it was February the 14th, Valentine's day. Discarding the tie to his fist, he stared you down with menacing eyes, making you gulp down the present discomfort in your throat, your fearful yet expectant orbs gazing into his raged one.

“i’m really trying to control myself,” “good, we haven’t even started,”

With his tongue poking the side of his cheek from annoyance, you led him to the backyard where a table was set from your preparation and he seemed surprised at the notion, and his mouth slitted open as you hauled the piping hot dish towards the meagre wobbling metal table that withheld the dishes well, allowing you to take a seat opposite of jay.

The look in his eyes was penetrating, feeling your throat close in more as you coughed uncontrollably prompting him to hand you a glass of water, glued to his seat as he observed you heave up and down before the hectic coughing subsided and you felt the air reach your nostril and travel without a hitch to your lungs.

“sorry, i, uh, made us dinner,” you conveyed, forcing a wide smile while overlooking your fit of spontaneous fits of coughing, “i can see that,” he responded sternly, beginning to serve the food onto both plates, his eyes not letting up the cold act for a millisecond, like he almost meant it.

You picked at your food, staring at him eat wordlessly, the irritation in your throat causing you to gag and wince every now and then before you mustered to pierce through the tension filled atmosphere, “did i do something wrong?” The resounding clang of the utensil to the plate made you straighten your back, “no, i’m just upset over the fact you had to lie to get me here,” he paused, drifting off into a daze, “i haven’t come home in a while, i know,”

He shifted away from your constraint, locking eyes with his meal and eating the plate clean, “you’ve gotten better at cooking,” he commented, shutting his eyelids and leaning back on the cold metal of the chair, waiting for you finish your respective meal, making you swallow down the larger chunks in haste. You stood to your feet, the ordeal leaving a metallic taste in your mouth. The chair scraped back, you collected the dishes and placed them in the sink, the unsettling pit in your stomach only digging deeper with the irking sensation in the back of your throat growing ratched.

You went to bed with a heavy heart, his back facing yours as he wordlessly drifted to slumber, leaving you to your consuming thoughts. Maybe, just maybe, he really was exhausted. You shouldn't have been so disapproving of him for his mental absence.

Either way, your plan was an absolute failure.

The sun rose inevitably and jay arose to his right, feet planted on the rugged flooring, remaining sat on the bedding, heaving a loud sigh. He peered over his back to sneak a peek at your asleep state. The way your eyes were clamped shut and your brows furrowed with a strong pout spoke enough of your nightmare and jay exhaled into his palms away from you.

He'd hate to break your heart but he'd hate to lead you on even more. He couldn't bring himself to feel the same anymore, his emotionality drained and his sentiments aside, he felt guilt to have wronged you. He felt like a shitty person every morning to face your innocent stature suffocating him in wallow. So, every morning, he left before you awoke to stop the aching in his wilting heart.

The dip in the mattress rises as he does, stepping disheartedly to the bathroom to start his mundane routine. The shower head shoots water as his hair dampens, his sole salty tears mixing with the overhead resource, tears drowning in silence. You stir awake with your throat suffocatingly sore to the point where swallowing water was excruciatingly painful.

The small clock on the bed side table ticked with faint clicks, the hour handle clocked at 7 with the longer needle on 40 as the splinter-like needle spun periodically. You coughed, finding it hard to breathe, the itching sensation increasing as you felt something will up your throat, your hand bracing your mouth in a clasp. 

Mustering out the strange discomfort inducing object, you coughed out a petite, white petal, accompanied with a sized spot of blood painting its own canvas— your palm, per se. Observing the viscous liquid the upside length of your hand, you begin to feel nauseous, ripping the blanket off you and grasping your neck from pain.

You separated the petal from the splash or crimson, clutching it in your free hand as jay made his way over to you, draped in a bathrobe, ushering your tained palm inspect. He grimaced at the sight of blood staining your palm, his thumb instinctively finding your cheek rubbing it of what he attempted to seem affectionate. 

Tears pricking your orbs, you urged forward and wrapped your arms around him merely to be held away from his hold with a jerk, making you gape clueless. "it'll stain," he reminded, though he'd pushed you for other reasons he couldn't have the guts to come clean too.

Wiping your eyes dry, you stepped away from him and washed away the substance while jay suited up for work. You left the premise and returned to where jay buttoned his shirt hastily. You strode up to him and finally found yourself in his hesitant hold, peering up to him with glossy eyes. 

He sighed into your face, his arms tightening around you as you hiked to his eye level in your tiptoes to press a peck to his lips. You approached forward and pecked his lips, to confirm your growing doubt. You readjusted to kiss him, parting your mouth only for him to pull you back once again with another excuse. 

"you haven't brushed your teeth yet," he delivered with a soft tone, running his hand down your bed hair. It stung. Not just your throat, your heart, years ago into your relationship you'd made out plenty of times with a nasty breath and none of you seemed to mind. He really was making… excuses. 

The flowers, the blood—him avoiding you, your fleeting touch— most importantly, he began to ignore your feelings for him. 

Jay was falling out of love with you.

iii. grow thorns

Desperate. That's what you felt coursing through your veins as you curled into a ball on the carpeted floor in the empty residence, jay long gone on a business trip to wherever. Upon your gruesome piecing together, you felt despair and spent most of your time wallowing in streams of tears.

It was March and you laid sick in bed, occasionally leaving to fulfil your regular duties as a human while completely neglecting physical activity and socialising, not like you were good at either but this case was extreme. The same boy you felt deeply connected to, the boy who made you understand what love felt like, the boy who showed you true love—which your parents always failed to accommodate— was also the boy who'd crumble your fragile beating soul to rubble.

Your first petals you coughed were once pea size petals that gradually turned into full fledged, grown petals, heaving up your trachea, branches growing in your lungs making it all the much harder for you to breathe. In arounv a week's time, was your anniversary with jay. It'd be foolish to think he'd just take you back like that after the answer of unrequited love stood from your lungs. 

Perhaps if he broke your heart a second time, you would be convinced and mercilessly succumb to the inevitable.

You kept the petals you threw to a side, setting up a fresh canvas and painting a blank later for white onto it. Unsure of what to paint, you stood contemplating what you were even doing in the first place but the thought of gifting it to him seemed motivating and so you began.

Strokes of wet paint slapped onto the once pearly white canvas, skilledly sketching with your brush the outline of your objects, filling in the remnants of white into the backdrop of the portrait. It wasn't over till it was, eventually over. The faint lines of your boyfriend became clear and so had your mind. You knew what your next change of plan would be.

Jay returned around two weeks later and by then your health had declined and the loneliness merely increased. Hesitant to speak to you, you took the hint and mainted your distance as well, only interacting when needed as he used the spare bedroom to rest. Indeed,.t hurt to think that he found it hard to even sleep next to you but you weren't going to take it till he uttered the words himself.

Then came your anniversary. The two of you had been great friends for four years and then dated for four and you'd like to say that you both were still going strong, though your current situation said all but that. You requested jay to help in making dinner for the while none of you spoke a word of the day's occasion.

You were at work chopping the vegetables as jay readied the base, sprinkling some spices and checking the flavouring every now and then all without saying a word to you. Your eyes travelled from the steaming stew to where he placed the spoon between his lips, a furrow creasing on his face, tongue clicking.

"salt," he mumbled, eyes drifting from around where he situated, then shifting to around you. The salt was placed beside the chopping board, and that meant it was across you, an arm's distance. Without much thought, he stepped closer to you and reached for the salt, his arm brushing past your waist, causing him to tense, his orbs darting to yours.

You solemnly watched his eyes grow from hesitate to panic to worry. Worry, however, caught you off guard? His hand remained on the salt bottle, arm still at your waist. "you've gotten thin," he mustered, peering down  at you. Your lips parted and cursed yourself for the water gathering in your tear glands.

You shifted to face him and your fists collided with the material of his shirt, clutching it in your grasp while you looked to your feet to collect your thoughts. Jay watched with no thoughts, bewildered at your shaken state. Just in time, your throat began to cave in.

You showed him your back, heaving up and down, the petals trailing up your throat and hitting your palm. You smacked your chest uncomfortably to stop the tractions to not let him suspect anything was out of order.

"you okay?" he queried, feeling the thumps of his feet getting closer to you, panicking as you collected blood and petals into your hand, the fear of him peeking it at your new high. He reached to your position and you scurried off in a haste towards the washroom. Passing by your jar of petals, you dropped them into the pot in a hurry as jay caught up to you.

Drowning the crimson in the sink you ran water on your hands, cutting the water supply and placing your wetted hands on the cold counter, panting. The heavy footsteps echoed and then soon were planted behind you. You gazed at his fallen front in the mirror. Why? Why did he look disheartened? Did he feel something for you after all?

He panned you around, caging you to the marbled counter, sealing in his arms with your chest by his, solely daring to search for any love in his eyes. Yanking the sleeve of your sweatshirt laid a spot of crimson from the viscous liquid. You mentally winced and set your sights away from him.

His finger glided to your chin and brought you towards his front, his palm resting on your cheek, "you're not okay, are you darling," he conveyed as your heart grumbled at the endeared name, a stray tear threatening to stain your cheek. "i've been unwell,"

The silence dawned on the two of you as he buried his hand in your hair, tugging down on it to tilt your head up, and his finger parting your nimble lips, the salty taste lingering in his mouth as he pressed down, and gave you a kiss. Under any circumstance than this, you'd relish the feeling but you felt sick with your throat itching.

Nonetheless, you played into his act of affection, gripping him further as his neck dipped to reach further in your cavern. Taking in what'd be the last time you'd ever meet his lips with such fever you attempted to feel the texture of his moist lips diving in and out. the pop sound loud and clear as you pulled him off of you. He settled his hand by your ear, his thumb giving you a false sense of security as he rested his forehead against yours.

"shall we get married?"

The falter in his facials was apparent and you felt your heart fall to your stomach. "marriage? what are you talking about, we're only 21," he missed, trying to play it cool.

"you know I love you right?" you did love him, you weren't lying but he didn't and you wouldn't let go of him till he said those harsh words himself.

His lack of reply set you off and you changed your blank face to that of despair, " you don't love me?" 

"i…"

You shoved him away, crinkling your eyes in downward crescents as tears peaked from your eyes, playing at his heart strings. You felt the similar aggression of anger pile in him as he rushed his breathing, brows furrowing deep and the same mouth you kissed parted to utter icy words..

"do you know how it feels to date the one you've known and cared for since you were child?! not once have I ever hurt you nor done anything to hurt and i never will but I can’t sleep at night looking at your unaware face that i settled to for work. It’d break my heart to break your’s but i can’t let up with this without feeling guilty for leading you on when i cannot bring myself to feel those sentiments of love— i just don’t love you like before! "

Though you knew it was coming, the actuality hurt so much more. The lines of him declining your love for him played repeatedly. Jay left the room and the house, slamming the front door to possibly never return again. You sobbed even harder than before, falling to the floor urging the feeling to succumb to die as you coughed up amounts of blood  and petals onto the floor in shambles.

iv. wither

April came as fast as March left with Jay slamming the door, never to return under any circumstance. You strongly believed he began living at his office unless one friend allowed him to stay over for an extended period of time. You, however, hadn't had any luck with getting better, accepting you would die soon.

Mustering any strength you conjured to get out of bed, meeting the carpeted floor where you'd spend hours staring at the ceiling with teary eyes. You were going to go down like this, despite your dreams and aspirations, this was how'd you succumb to death.

The sole motivation to sit by your canvas, that slowly came to picture, was the haunted expression in his front you could imagine ever so vividly. You meagre around the house to get your jar of thrown up petals, stained scarlet, quite a nice piece of decor to the vicinity though it'd be too bad that you'd be gone to not see it as one.

Frailly reaching for one petal, then another, you stuck them in carefully, the internal shaking refusing to seize as your breath turned shallow, leaving you gasping for air, overexerting yourself in finishing the piece. 

On the once pearly white canvas sat a portrait of jay through the lens of your antique camera where you stood a trail of your petals and blood mixed onto the canvas, increasing as they led to your situation behind the camera just like your dying self behind the canvas.

Finishing the painting, you felt the hot breath hit your tired out hands and brittle paint dipped fingers— the same fingers Jay would kiss to you sleep, ticking you into bed if you ran a fever— were also the ones that gripped to the head rest, giving to the growing tiredness that overcame you, turning to lie flat on your back.

The keys jingled in the near distance, jay slipping in through the door, watching as nothing had really moved around in the house. He contemplated on notifying you of his abrupt appearance, opting to slowly creep up the stairs. Unknown to you, you had started coughing again, the strength in your arms to cover your mouth non-existent.

Resulting in the blood coating you and the mattress in a painful fit of red as you sobbed heartbroken to yourself wondering where it went wrong, did he require more space, had you been more mindful would he still be at your side.

Jay stilled on hearing your heart wrenching sobs, the previous hesitance gone as he ran up the stairs and to your situation on the bed stained bed. Having forgotten about your coughing fit of blood through the apparent stress from the separation. 

His sight fell to the canvas in front of him greeting as you cough seized, your eyelids lugging over your glassed over orbs, jay getting to knees as he saw you covered in blood, his hand finding your paint ridden hand. You gave a weak chuckle, "if we ever meet again, I hope it works out then," you say, the diamonds leaving the comfort of your eyes and onto your crimson imposed self. 

Jay heaved from panic, "why didn't you tell me?!" He hurried exclaimed, his hand running down your arm to keep your burning vessel even warmer. Unbeknownst to him he'd been crying and you watched with low eyes close to shutting, your palm lifting up to his tear stricken cheek, "just know," you paused, shutting your eyes completely feeling the life get sucked out of your body. 

"i loved you."

alternate ending. (1.6k)

[nohoperadio]

35: Aisle at the grocery store you never bother walking down? and/or 41: What's the oldest thing you own? and/or 38: What's the last filter you changed?

35: Aisle at the grocery store you never bother walking down?

I think the only aisle of (at least my current) main store I've literally never made a purchase from is the beers wines and spirits aisle. I don't never drink but my interest in it fell off dramatically over the course of my twenties, now my drinking is basically limited to when I'm at gigs and even then I don't always, it's just sometimes helpful for lowering my standards if I'm seeing a band I'm not sure whether I'll enjoy. But drinking as a means to socializing doesn't appeal to me these days, and just qua beverage nothing excites me either. (Probably an influence on my indifference is that I've seen a younger sibling basically destroy his life and arguably someone else's with the help of alcohol--it hasn't made me "against" the stuff per se but it does rather take away from the lustre. Uhh sorry to bring the mood down I'll keep it light from here on out!).

(I have an unopened bottle of rum in my home distilled by the fantasy author Ben Aaronovitch which my work gave me in acknowledgement of my being just generally swell, and I have no goddamned clue what to do with it. If I was smarter at cooking perhaps I'd think of something there. Maybe you have a suggestion??)

41: What's the oldest thing you own?

I don't have anything you'd call antique, but when I'm in a second-hand bookstore (which I'm not very often nowadays because when you work in a bookshop that kind of day trip is something of a busman's holiday) I'm very easily wooed by anything that looks old as balls, and if it's not so old as balls as to be an expensive "rare book" kind of item I will sometimes persuade myself that I should buy it, regardless of how objectively low the chances of me ever reading it are. I'm not sure which of these is actually the oldest, but maybe the poster child for this genre of unwise purchase is The Complete Self-Educator:

Which is an 800-page book designed to give autodidacts a well-rounded education, it has sections on all the major sciences as well as English, French, philosophy, "English" and "World" history and other stuff, divided into lessons with little tests after each one. Pretty fun to flick through, it's got illustrations too:

For some reason old books don't always list publication years inside, but there's a written inscription in this one saying it was gifted to an Edward I. Bryars of Bristol (From John Bull) on October 26th 1939. Which isn't mind-blowingly old but I can't think of anything older I have.

38: What's the last filter you changed?

See I don't even really know what this question is, and I'm not sure whether that's because I'm not American or because I'm just generally unworldly. What are all these filters I'm supposed to be changing! I can't remember ever interacting with a "filter". I'm googling about filters and there's stuff about water filters which I don't really know what that is but I'm sure I've never changed one, there's stuff about cars which I don't own a car and never will (I guess not being American plays a role in me getting to decide that), there's stuff about air conditioning but that isn't really a thing in this country (okay you guys win that one). I don't think filters are part of my lifestyle! I hope that's not too disappointing. Maybe I'm forgetting something super obvious idk.

[ravenkinnie]

'what archetypes do these characters fit' >>> 'what is their purpose in the story, what is the function that their motivations and actions are meant to serve' is fr really the best way to approach character discussions in arcane and i wish every part of fandom understood this.

like i remember when i was on arcanetwt (which is months ago. maybe the place changed recently idk) ppl obsess over the characters' morality or just clearly perceive them based on morality and it creates the most reductive takes ive seen of silco jinx vi and all the chars really.

lets see whether or not that changes in s2 lmao

tbh arcane fandom especially on twitter tends to either skew younger or be 30 year olds desperate for those 19 year olds to form personality cults around them. so you have people who either are YA demographic or just aged out or simply never graduated to adult media by choice. and also many people probably have to pop a ritalin to read anything longer than 280 characters cause none of us have an attention span anymore so you have an absolutely asinine environment to have any conversation in

and this isn't me shitting on YA as a genre, this is me saying you expect younger people to have more black and white thinking in how they approach the world, other people, and themselves so YA tends to be much more focused on those dichotomies, on the good vs evil divides and less so on asking open-ended questions

the way people talk about media literacy you would think it's an inborn thing but that's absolutely nor the case, an innate thing is your ability to engage in a narrative and feel a story emotionally but understanding a story is a different skill, it develops over time and experience. language of media is its own language, it's centuries of a cultural code and symbols that you will learn eventually if you engage in varied forms of media but you are going to have some stupid ass takes along the way

arcane has this very fast pacing and snappy voicy dialogue that appeals to that demographic but, while it's not like so complex an average human with an adult brain won't understand it, its somewhat more complex in themes and characterisation than you would expect from that YA/NA skewing story. like that's the fun part about stories and about people, no one is that simple. the worst person you know probably has a wife that would die for them and you just cannot comprehend how the fuck that's possible. so you go and write a book about it, that's how it works

I think season 2 will make people worse because vi will be a cop </3 which yeah league has been cribge about it over the years but by now its also kind of the point of her character </3

[chocotonez]

toxic!txt + breakups

a/n: idk man anon wanted angst and I love school/campus aus and then I love writing the toxic men?? idk just take it 😭 this isn’t really my usual content but I found the premise interesting so !! also some of these don’t really have an argument, the prompt is so broad I’m sorry lolol, also!! please don’t romanticize or try to find the appeal in toxic behavior, these hcs are merely speculative and not at all what anyone deserves, if you feel you’re in a dangerous situation text START to 88788 for the domestic violence hotline, and know you have people looking out for you, you deserve to be safe and in a happy, healthy relationship! anyways I’m done bothering you here’s the fic lmao

warnings/genre: txt are kinda dicks, toxic behavior, suggestive content, somewhat campus au, this is just me over-exaggerating speculated toxic traits of txt this doesn’t represent them in any way, angst, arguing, crying, borderline gaslighting, lmk if there’s anything else to be tagged!!

yeonjun

-he’s extremely popular all over campus, for good reason. he’s smart, funny, gets along well with others and is an active member in the student body

-he’s also just in general a very “nice guy” to be around, and you two are considered the it couple the school

-but in truth he’s just kinda a dick, it was nice to date him for the first few months but after a while it was evident you weren’t exactly the priority, and more of his repuation

-honestly you think he stayed with you because you two looked good together, which looked good for him

-he’s not directly mean towards you?? Like he’ll be very casual, “love you” or “good morning” texts but he’ll ghost you for three days and then his social media story is him at a party with other girls. but he’s very possessive over you n it’s genuinely the most infuriating thing in the world to see him wasted and enjoying his best life w everyone who has a crush on him in the same room, but you can’t even go out to see a friend he doesn’t like

-probably says “you can’t do that” if you try to break up with him, gets really frustrated and plays the victim, blames you for not giving him enough attention or space, or messing around w other persons trying to woo you

-shit talks you so much afterwards and he doesn’t even try to hide it anymore, honestly such a dick but he craves your attention so he’ll love-bomb you or show up at your door apologizing and crying

-it’s up to you whether you take him in or not, either way it’ll end in tears

soobin

-hes what I think is called an energy vampire, where your relationship is just him sapping your energy and feelings and it’s not fun at all

-probably ignores you and passive aggressively texts you because you posted a selfie w friends and there was a guy he didn’t like in there

-always makes it seem like you’re the bad person, he just wants you all to himself and it was cute at first but then you find yourself crying because he claims you don’t love him since you’re “always busy with other people”

-he’s not that much of a solitary person either, he has friends and he never even gives you a heads up if he’s out with other people tbh

-unlike yeonjun I think soobin isn’t self aware of his toxic behavior to an extent, he doesn’t really recognize how he’s sapping your energy and getting jealous over small things, but he’s definitely aware when he’s trying to win you over with borderline-manipulative statements, “I’m sorry you feel that way” type of guy

-the type to text you “who was that guy you were with” after you break up, and suddenly he’s giving you the attention you always craved and needed from him. loving texts and romantic gestures, but are you really willing to back to him?

-probably tbh

beomgyu

-moodmaker, but that means if he’s in a bad mood it is just game over for you, because he makes it everyone’s problem

-clingy, wants to be with you 24/7, he’s borderline obsessed with you where he wants your attention to be on him and only him

-it’s cute at first, but suddenly he’s sobbing and arguing over how you “hate him” and you “don’t want to spend time with him”, he’s hyper sensitive to you leaving him behind and it causes so many problems

-but whenever u hang out with him he’s such a sweet and loving boyfriend, if he only gets you all to himself, which is exhausting! so reasonably you break up with him!

-he is very unreasonable! :) spam texts you, spam calls you, asks why you would do this, cries at your front door and suddenly he’s proclaiming how much he loves you and how he needs you

-without you, he’s missing a part of himself, without you he has no one to love, without you, how is anyone gonna validate him with attention? he wants it to be you, that’s all, is it really so bad to want that from someone you love?

-no, of course it’s not, so just let him back into your life so he can use you to fill his need for affection and attention!!

taehyun

-he’s very,,,permissive in a relationship, very absent and it almost feels like your alone half the time when it comes to affection, but when it comes to micro-managing your life??

-“uh ok. sorry you feel that way but-“ he always manages to invalidate your feelings or dumb it down so you sound like a big baby, which is why he’ll make all the choices for you! even if you don’t ask!! or want his overbearing opinion <33

-but everyone finds it so cute, in the hallways he’s always holding your hand and he carries your school bag, he feeds you his snacks, and he acts perfectly fine on the outside. to everyone else, he’s just the more dominant figure in your relationship

-but then he starts getting pissed over you going to a party without telling him what you were gonna wear, who you were gonna be with, etc…

-blames you 4 being inconsiderate of his feelings when you call him out, and he actually breaks up w you and makes you feel like a horrible person by exaggerating every “wrong” you did against him

-he reverse psychology-ed you into actually feeling like you were a bad person for speaking up for yourself, and then he’s like “oh dumb baby it’s ok” and he’s so patronizing

-“thank you for apologizing baby, this is why I make all the choices, remember?”

hyuka

-constant drama w him, there’s always something to blame him for. yes him, because every time you point out a wrong he did he blows it out of proportion and act like you always make him the bad guy

-“oh, I guess it’s bad for me to be insecure about that person you were hanging out with earlier!” and then he acts like a kicked puppy to get you to feel bad for him

-after repetitive arguments of crying, you break up and it’s honestly kinda scary how intent he is on getting you back

-similar to beomgyu, he wants your affection and is practically addicted to it, so you can’t just leave him!! how could you hurt him like this?? because obviously everything is ur fault!!

-he’s the campus angel, he’s so sweet and kind so how can you be so mean? (apparently it’s mean to want personal space and establish boundaries in relationship) he does large romantic gestures to prove to everyone that he was the good boyfriend, and you were the bad person

-pays for ur lunch or walks you to class, makes it seem like you got him wrapped around your finger. and you do! kinda, but your finger is just intertwined with his. but he just loves u so so so much, so how could you let him go?

[kay-diggle]

A Second Experience

Summary: Y/N is less sexually experienced than her boyfriend, Jimin, and she wants to change that by getting another person involved as well.

*This is a continuation of a short fic I wrote three years ago called “Experience.”  t’s not required to read Experience first, but I would recommend it!! It can be found on my Masterlist as well! Pls check author notes at the end*

Pairing: Jimin x Female Reader x OC Vanessa

Genre & Rating: Smut, 18+ (kind of just pwp but like 97% porn!)

Warnings: bisexual!OC, bisexual/bi-curious!reader, threesome, oral (f & m. recieving),  dom!jimin, dom!OC, sub!reader (y/n is kinda getting passed around in this idk), a little degradation, some praise, sexual insecurities, breast fondling, handjob, blowjob, bondage? (Y/n gets tied up with a belt), sexual intercourse, unprotected sex (pls be safe guys), use of sex toys (dildos), honestly it’s hard to put warnings because so much happened here and it’s absolutely filthy pls just read with caution!!

Length: 7.2k words

*This fic is currently un-edited*

Kay-Diggle’s Ultimate Masterlist

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“Jimmmiinn,” you said in a sing-song tone.

“Oh god,” he groaned playfully. “What is it y/n?”

“Well, I saw an interesting post on Twitter earlier and it got me thinking-”

“Well that’s never good,” he cut you off, a teasing smile on his face.

“Shut up!” you laughed, moving to straddle his lap. You knew you would have to up the sex appeal for what you were about to propose to him.

“There was a woman who made a tweet about how she and her boyfriend had a threesome with some other girl and he ended up getting the girl pregnant.”

“Wow.. that’s terrible. She must be heart-broken,” he frowned but you couldn’t help but smile a little at how your boyfriend was always so thoughtful towards other people’s feelings, even those he didn’t know.

“Yeah, it sucks. She was super upset….”

“Yeah,” he studied your face, trying to see any reason why you’d be bringing this up to him. “Y/n, where exactly is this going?”

“Well… I was just curious about whether you have ever had a threesome before?” you asked shyly, making yourself a bit smaller in his lap. When you had planned the conversation out in your head hours earlier, you didn’t think you would be this nervous.

“Have I ever had a threesome?” your boyfriend raised his eyebrows as he repeated your question.

“Honestly, yes, with two girls. BUT it was a long time ago -- way before we met, and super random.”

You remembered the conversation you had with him a few months ago about your inexperience  when you had sucked him off for the first time, and you couldn’t help but frown. His reassurance from before had definitely made you feel much better, but his answer was disappointing. You wanted him to say no. You wanted him to never have done anything as “freaky” as having a threesome. But it is supposed to be every man’s dream, right? Or maybe that’s just a bad stereotype. Either way, he’s done it.

The sex between you and Jimin was always good, but always the same. Never switching it up much, usually vanilla, nothing but soft touches. The first and only time you had ever seen a more dominant side to him was when he was coaching you through giving your first blow job and you absolutely loved it. You wanted to see that side of him again. And although his reassurance was nice, upon hearing his answer to your question, you immediately went back into questioning if you were good enough to please him. I mean how could you, who had been a virgin a few months ago, compete with his sexual experience of having two girls at once.

But really, you felt most disappointed because you wanted him to say no so that it could be something you’d experience for the first time together.

And Jimin being the ever observant boyfriend he was immediately picked up on mood shift. “Babe?”

“Hmm?”

“What’s wrong? And before you tell me ‘nothing,’ I know you’re lying,” he wrapped his arms around you, pulling you closer towards his body.

You sighed. “I asked for a reason but then I kind of just got into my own head just now, and now I don’t know how I feel. Just forget I asked, it’s stupid. I’m stupid,” you tried to move off of his lap, making him tighten his hold on you.

“Okay, woah woah woah, slow down. Why did you ask, and what did you think because of the answer? I need you to talk to me okay, I’m right here,” he brought one hand up to cup your cheek, guiding you to look him in the eyes. You melted at his words once again, getting ready to spill your guts.

“Well… I was.. It’s just.. You being with two girls made me feel a little insecure,” you confessed, avoiding his eyes.

Jimin sighed deeply before removing his other arm from around you to hold your face in his both hands, forcing you to look at him again. “This is the last time we’re having this conversation. This will be the last time that I tell you nothing I did in the past matters anymore. I love you; I only want you. You are perfect in every aspect of the word.” He kissed you and you wanted to cry. You loved this man so much.

“Okay,” you gave him a sad smile after your lips left each other. “I only asked because… well.. I wanted you to not have done it before because….. I wanted us to try it together,” you mumbled that last part under your breath, hoping he couldn’t hear you, but he did. And he was dumbfounded.

“You- you want to have a thre- threesome?”

You winced at his question. “Yes.. is that crazy?”

“No!” he rushed to make sure you knew he wasn’t judging you. “Babe it’s not crazy at all, I just didn’t think it would be something you were into.”

“Well… are you into it?”

“I mean, I guess I could be. I don’t particularly like the idea of sharing you though,” he joked, easing your nerves just a bit.

“Well I’d be sharing you too. Plus I want it to be with another girl!”

“Oh.”

To say Jimin was surprised would be an understatement. Everything about this conversation had shocked him, but this? He would have never seen this coming.

“Well.. do you like girls? In that way? Is that what this is about?” he asked thoughtfully.

“I’ve been attracted to women in the past, yes, but I’ve never really thought about it too deeply. Women are just beautiful, ya know?” you chuckled. “I would like to experience being with a girl to see how I like it, but we really don’t have to -”

“We can if you’re comfortable with it,” he cut you off. “I just- are you sure this is a good idea? If we do this, I don’t want you comparing yourself to the other girl.”

“I won’t! I mean… I’ll try my best not to. But I honestly think it could be fun. Doing things with you, and getting to have my first experience with another girl at the same time.”

And you also thought that Jimin having a new memory of a threesome that you were in replacing the memory of the old one could be a plus too.

“Okay then, let’s do it,” he smiled and kissed you.

-

It was a girl you had gone to high school with, Vanessa. She had came out as bisexual and openly dated and hooked up with both sexes. You weren’t exactly friends but had always been friendly enough with each other due to having common acquaintances. And she was hot. And also super nice. When you had reached out to her and explained your situation, she agreed with little to no reluctance.

Jimin took the backseat, wanting you to have the final decision in everything. In his mind, all he had to do was show up and make sure you were happy and feeling secure in your relationship. He wanted this entire experience to be about you and what you wanted which is why he easily agreed to the girl you chose, not taking much interest in her in the first place. He only had eyes for you and made sure to let you know as much as he could in the days leading up to the time you scheduled with Vanessa.

Now sitting in Jimin’s bedroom with your two partners, you felt a little more than awkward with the situation; however, Vanessa was quick to create a pleasant atmosphere with Jimin’s help.

“So, is there anything off limits for you two?” she asked.

You and Jimin shared a look, realizing that this was probably something you should have discussed beforehand. “Well.. uh, Y/n?” Jimin offered the question to you.

“Um… I don’t think so? Maybe just nothing with anal cause I’ve never done that before. Other than that, I think I’m good.”

“Alright, I can work with that,” Vanessa smiled sweetly. “Anything else?”

“No, I think we’re all set,” said Jimin.

“Great. Well then….” Vanessa got up and started moving towards you with a predatory gaze. “Let’s get these clothes off you,” she started removing your jacket after pulling off her own.

She caressed your arm before straddling your lap. You wrapped your arms around her waist, looking up at her with slightly scared eyes. She giggled at you before kissing you. The kiss was slow as she was clearing testing the waters, and when she started grinding down on your lap, you took the initiative to slip your tongue into her mouth, but she kept in control of the kiss anyways. As Vanessa rocked her hips on you, she moved your hands to make you grab her ass.

And Jimin sitting next to you was getting hard beyond belief at the sight of you two all over each other. Frankly, it makes him feel like one of those horny teenage boys who always fantasize about two women being together. He decided to intervene, coughing slightly to remind the two of you of his presence.

Vanessa pulled away from the kiss at that sound, smirking before she moved to sit in his lap too. His hands found a place on her waist, but he was sure to look at you for confirmation before doing anything. When you gave him a small nod, they moved to kiss each other. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy the feeling of her lips, but at the end of the day, they just weren’t yours.

“Move towards the headboard,” Vanessa sent the command to you once she pulled away from your boyfriend’s lips.

You followed her instructions and watched as she got off of Jimin’s lap and sunk to her knees in between his legs. Jimin had to take in a breath at the sight of her seductive eyes looking back at her. She unbuckled his belt, pulled it through the loops of his jeans and placed it in his hands, muttering a quick ‘hold this’ before starting to rub him through his pants. And when she licked him through his pants, he leaned back on his palms, waiting for her to get to work with her mouth. However, she had other plans.

“Oh Jimin, as fine as you are… and you are VERY fine, I’m more interested in playing with her,” she nodded her head towards you.

Having been sitting near the headboard this whole time and just watching, you were expecting the same as Jimin, that Vanessa was going to give him a blowjob, so when the attention was suddenly centered on you, you froze.

She stood to her feet and pulled you by your ankles to make you lay down. While you tried to control your breathing, Vanessa whispered something in your boyfriend's ear and stood back while Jimin approached you, smirking. He spread your legs and crawled in between them to sit on his knees, coming down to kiss you. His hands find your waist and begin tugging up the hem of your shirt before it's pulled over your head and thrown on the floor. You take the initiative to unhook your bra too before laying back down, pulling Jimin to kiss you again before breaking away.

“Y/n, Jimin is going to tie you up,” Vanessa comes to the side of the bed, breaking you out of the trance Jimin’s lips just put you in.

You felt Jimin bring your wrists together and wrap his belt around them, fastening them to one of the bars of the headboard. You tugged at the restraints to find that they weren’t too tight but tight enough that you couldn’t  break free which made you a little tense. Sensing this, Jimin rubbed your thighs to soothe you and leaned down to press sweet kisses to the side of your neck.

“You doing okay?” he whispered.

“Yes… kiss me,” you replied and your lips connected once more.

Jimin schooched down the bed and took your panties and shorts off with him, leaving you bare for Vanessa who took Jimin’s place in between your legs. She kissed your lips, then moved to your neck leaving tiny love bites, and worked her way down to your breasts massaging both of them in her hands and licking and biting one of your nipples while looking you directly in the eyes before switching to the other. Behind her, you saw Jimin leaning against the wall in your room, staring at the sight before him and looking absolutely delectable. You couldn’t help the tiny moans you let out, so aroused that your wetness was starting to drip out of you and onto the bed.

When Vanessa had enough of teasing you, she turned back to look at boyfriend. “Do you eat your girlfriend out a lot Jimin?”

“Whenever she wants.”

“Good. Tell me how she likes it then,” Vanessa turned back to you, smirking before kissing down the length of your torso and biting at the inside of your thigh, closest to where you need her. You felt her breath puff out against you, creating a cooling sensation.

Jimin moved towards the bed and sat on his knees near your head, looking at you once before turning to watch Vanessa as he gave her instructions.

“Lick up her slit a few times, slowly,” he said and watched as she did so. “Good, now use the tip of your tongue to circle around her clit and then suck on it… fuck, just like that.”

Jimin couldn’t take his eyes off the sight of this woman eating you out. He was really turned on by it and you could tell when you saw him gripping himself through his tight jeans. At that moment, you decided to help him get off too.

“Fuck… uh, Jimin?” He finally turned his eyes towards you and all you saw was lust. “Fuck my mouth while she eats me out… please?”

And he didn’t even have to think twice before removing his clothes, joining you back on the bed. You tilted your head in his direction and stuck your tongue out, allowing him to gently tap it with the tip of his cock a few times. When you heard him whisper out a quiet ‘fuck,’ you suckled on the tip a little bit, swirling your tongue around it before letting him stick more of his length into your mouth. He let out a moan at the feeling of your mouth around him, and then let out another one when he turned to see Vanessa still eating you out after getting the hang of it.

He watched as she licked on your clit, sucked it and then thrust her tongue into your center a few times, causing you to let out little moans around him. Vanessa licked her way back up to your clit before lightly slapping your clit. The shock from it had you jolting up, taking more of Jimin in your mouth and when he felt your throat tighten around him, he threw his head back in pleasure, trusting into your mouth a little more aggressively.

“Fuck Vanessa, do that again,” he directed her and she listened, making you cry out around Jimin’s cock.

He brought his hand down to your head to remove the hair that was falling into your eyes and wrapped one hand around the back of your neck to thrust into your mouth more easily. “Fuck her open with your fingers,” he commanded while looking straight into your eyes, still thrusting.

When you felt Vanessa collect some of your wetness on a finger before sliding it in and sucking on your clit again, you gagged around Jimin. He let out a deep moan of your name at the feeling before taking himself out of your mouth to let you breathe. You coughed a few times and then he came down to kiss you again but all you could do was let out moans against his mouth as Vanessa added another finger into you and curled them, pushing that spongy spot inside of you.

“Does what she’s doing feel good, baby?” he asked.

“Yes.. it feels really good,” you nodded. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum,” you confessed.

“Jimin,” Vanessa stilled her fingers but licked against your clit just once. “Do I stop, or should we let her cum?”

“Hmm,” he looked down at you. “I don’t know. She’s been good, hasn’t she?” his hand traveled down to your soaking pussy, two fingers rubbing  your clit.

“Yessss,” you whined, and then Vanessa began fucking you with her fingers again.

“Oh God, s-so soo close,” you breathed out.

“Yea? You gonna be a good little slut and come for us Y/n?” Jimin asked, slapping your clit lightly before rubbing again. And then you saw white as your orgasm took over, your back arching as you pulled at the belt against your wrists. Vanessa held your hips down and legs open while Jimin continued rubbing you through your orgasm before he saw it was too much for you.

“Good girl,” Vanessa cooed, rubbing your thigh as you came down from your high. “So good for me and your boyfriend,” she giggled as she pressed kisses into your thigh.

“What happens now?” you asked breathlessly.

“I don’t know.. Should we keep her tied up?” Jimin directs his question to Vanessa.

“Hmmm.. no. I think I have an idea,” she replied, moving off the bed to strip out her clothes and get something out of her backpack.

After Jimin undid the belt, he kissed both of your wrists, wrapping them around his neck taking you into his arms to kiss your lips. You giggled, loving how your boyfriend could be so caring a minute after calling you a slut and making you cum with another person you forgot was in the room until you felt her hands rubbing your backside and kissing your neck.

“I have a strap,” she whispered in your ear. “Can I fuck you?”

You weren’t expecting this, so you looked at your boyfriend in shock, but when you saw in his eyes that he was turned on by the thought of you getting fucked with a plastic dick, you said yes.

“Sorry Jimin, she’s mine for the next few minutes,” Vanessa jokingly pushed him away and he sat against the headboard, gripping his hard length.

You watched as Vanessa tied the strap around her waist, and then she gathered your hair into one hand and moved your head towards the plastic dick, prompting you to get on your hands and knees,

“Suck on it a little bit, Y/n. Get it nice and wet so I can fuck you with it.”

You looked up at her and then down at the fake penis and opened your mouth, allowing her to guide it into your mouth. It was different from what you were used to, missing the warmth and thick girth that your boyfriend provided, but being a bit lengthier. You bob your head on it, coating it with your saliva before pulling back.

“Stay right there,” Vanessa whispered, kissing you and patting your check before moving behind you, giving you a full view of your boyfriend with his hand wrapped around his cock, precum dripping from the tip. He stared back at you with an intensity you’ve never seen from him before.

Vanessa watched the two of you for a second before harshly smacking your right ass cheek, making you whimper and arch your back even more.

“Is Jimin the only person who’s ever fucked you Y/n?” Vanessa asked while rubbing the tip of the toy against your wetness, slightly pushing into you and then quickly pulling out, effectively teasing you.

“Yes,” you breathe out.

“Yea? Well let’s change that, hmm?”

And then she slid the toy into you. You were so wet that there was little to no resistance because of how wet you’ve been the whole time. And again, you were missing the warmth that comes with Jimin’s cock, but this plastic one still felt good enough to make you almost scream out ‘oh shit’ as she bottomed out into you. She pulled out, and gave you a few more thrusts, allowing you to adjust to the toy. She tightened her grip on your waist, and sped up her movements a bit. Once she was able to fuck you more easily, she brought her hand to your head and pushed it down towards the bed, making you arch your back further and allowing her to go deeper.

“That feel good Y/n?”

“So good, so so good,” your moans muffled out into the pillow she was holding your head into.  out as you felt her hitting that spongy spot inside of you again.

Vanessa leaned down towards you, moving the hair that had fanned out across your cheek to the side and whispered in your ear, “tell your boyfriend how much you like it.”

With your head still pressed into the pillow, your eyes traveled up your boyfriend's body. His hard cock was standing at attention, tip red with precum leaking out, his hand wrapped tightly around it. He was lazily stroking it as he watched the scene before him. Your eyes traveled up more to see his toned chest and the bottom half of his face where he was biting his lip so hard it looked like he might draw blood.

Once your eyes found your boyfriends, you were surprised, as you had never seen his eyes so dark before, so full of lust. You had never seen him so turned on. “I like it,” you groaned out onto the pillow.

Jimin used his free hand to slip the pillow from under your head. “ What was that? I couldn’t hear you, slut.”

“I like it,” you nearly screamed as Vanessa was hitting all the right spots within you.

“Yea? You like getting fucked by Vanessa? You like her using that plastic in you while I’m sitting here, aching for you? You have me right here but you also needed the dildo cause you’re a greedy little whore, aren’t you?”

It was at this moment that you became aware of your boyfriend's degradation kink. You also found that you liked being degraded.

“Fuck yes!” you yelled out as you felt Vanessa move her hand underneath your body, her fingers finding your clit and rubbing it in a circular motion while continuing to pound you into the bed.

You were close. So close to coming again when you felt Vanessa stop, and pull your body up by your hair. You were at eye level with Jimin now and continued to hold eye contact with him as Vanessa gave you little shallow strokes in this new position.

“You’re letting somebody slut you out in front of your own boyfriend. Imagine what our classmates would think Y/n. You were always such a good girl,” she said, giving you a sharp thrust. “See how hard your boyfriend is for you, hmm? You got wetter when he was talking to you just now. Why don’t you be a good girl and go help him out. Go ride him Y/n.”

“Come here, pretty girl,” he called to you and held out his hand for you to take. It sounded like his voice had dropped another octave or two.

Once you were close enough, his hands gripped your waist and guided you to straddle his lap. As you were still kind of inexperienced, Jimin knew you still felt a little insecure about your riding skills, so he decided to guide you.

“You still okay?” he whispered.

“Yea.. are you?” you smiled and looked down at his hard length, wrapping your hand around it. He hissed at the feeling and dove in for a kiss.

You felt  Vanessa sneak up behind you and replace your hand on Jimin’s dick, sliding it back and forth between your sopping wet folds as the two of you continue to kiss. When Vanessa lines Jimin up with your entrance, Jimin breaks the kiss and uses his grip on your waist to pull you down onto his length. Both of your mouths drop open, momentarily speechless at the feeling. It felt much different than what you had experienced with Vanessa. He was warm inside of you. He was familiar… It felt like returning home.

Vanessa’s hands joined Jimin’s on your waist, and they both began to guide you to move up and down on his cock. You wrapped your arms around his neck to try and ground yourself somehow when Vanessa continued guiding you while Jimin focused his efforts on thrusting up into you.

“Oh my God,” Jimin whined as his lips found purchase on your neck, leaving kisses all over the area and little love bites.

“Now keep bouncing on your boyfriend’s cock just like that,” Vanessa said as she released her hold on you. You felt one of her hands travel from your waist and up your torso, stopping to play with one of your breasts and lightly pinch your nipple and then move further up until it was wrapped around your neck, slightly choking you. Her other hand moved to play with your clit again. You closed your eyes and cried out as soon as you felt her fingers on you. You weren’t going to last much longer, and you knew you wouldn’t be able to hold it.

“Jimin, I think we’re about to make your girlfriend cum,” Vanessa teased, tightening her grip on your throat.

“I think you’re right,” he lightly chuckled. “Look at me, pretty girl,” Jimin said, slapping your thigh and then letting his hands replace Vanessa’s on your waist. “Look right at me baby, open your eyes.”

You did as he commanded and were met with a sight you loved to see. Your boyfriend looked absolutely wrecked. Sweat dripping from his forehead, cheeks flushed, lips swollen from bites and kisses, and eyes darker than ever.

Jimin’s look paired with the dirty talk you couldn’t quite comprehend that Vanessa was whispering into your was pushing you over the edge.

“My pretty girl is gonna cum for me, right? My pretty little slut is gonna cum all over my cock, hmm? Keep those eyes open. Right on me.”

And you did exactly as he said. Your orgasm hit you, leaving your jaw slack and your body leaning back into Vanessa. Your legs started shaking as you raised yourself off his cock and let out heavy pants. Vanessa sat back with you between her legs, cooing at you, calling you all kinds of ‘pretty’ and ‘good girl’ as you came down from your high.

Without your knowledge, as you were busy trying to catch your breath, Jimin and Vanessa shared a quick look and head nod before both of their full attention were back on you. Jimin crawled in between your open legs and pressed a light kiss on your forehead as Vanessa continued to stroke your arms in a comforting way.

“You’re doing so well for us, y/n,” he said, pecking your lips. “You want to keep going?”

You were fucked out of your mind at this point, and so, you just nodded your head and gave your boyfriend a stupid smile.

“Okay. Stay just like this for me,” he sweetly stroked your cheek. “Vanessa, hold her legs open,” he instructed.

Vanessa held your legs up using the area behind your knees and then widened them. This position essentially left you immobile as you were laying directly on Vanessa and couldn’t move backwards either. And it’s exactly what Jimin wanted.

He slapped the tip of his cock against your sensitive and engorged clit a few times, smiling at your whining before using his hand to guide himself into your entrance once more.

“Fuck Y/n, you feel so good,” he groaned as he bottomed out. “Always so fucking good for me.”

His hands gripped your torso and he began fucking you faster, fucking you with purpose. The wet sound of skin slapping against skin mixed with your non stop moaning filled the room. You were so wet that he slipped out of you and he re-entered you, quickly resuming his previous movements.

The feeling was becoming too much for you to handle, too good, and you started wiggling your hips a little trying to move back, but it was impossible to do so with Vanessa’s grip on your legs and her body directly behind yours. Your boyfriend realized what you were trying to do and let out a deep chuckle.

“Vanessa,” Jimin calls out to her as he started slowing down his thrusts. . “Do you wanna know a secret?”

“Mmmhmm,” she hummed in response, too focused on watching your boyfriend move in and out of you.

“Y/n here is a runner,” he grunted. “Almost every time I fuck her, she tries to run from me. That’s why I’m happy you’re here.”

He looks down at you while you look up at him and his grip on your toso tightens. He stops his movements inside of you completely before lowering himself more towards you and giving you a light peck on your lips.

“There’s nowhere-” hard thrust “for you-” hard thrust “to run-” harder thrust “now.”

He began fucking you harder and harder, and you didn’t think you had ever felt him so deeply inside of you before. You could also feel Vanessa holding onto your legs tighter and grinding against the bed, no doubt turned on by the scene between you and your lover unfold right in front of her.

“Hmm.. look at how well you’re taking that dick Y/n. I know it feels so good. You should never run from it, sweetie,” said Vanessa. “Do you wanna cum again? Want your boyfriend to have you shaking all over his cock again?”

“Yes,” you looked up to her and answered, being so fucked out you were barely able to get the word out.

“Well I’m not the one fucking you am I?” she nodded towards Jimin. “Tell your boyfriend what you want. Ask him to let you cum.”

You refocused your attention on the man fucking into you. At this point, your eyes were so low that you could barely see him. Before you could even say anything, he shook his head at you causing you to whine once more.

“Can I please cum, Jimin? I’ve been so good for you and Vanessa. Please make me cum. Please let me cum. Please, please, please, please, please,” you cried. You could hear the desperation in your own voice and normally you would’ve been embarrassed, but you wanted to come so badly that you couldn’t even find it within yourself to care.

“You wanna come baby? I’ll make you cum.”

And you were so close, so so close to that feeling, that undeniable bliss you had been chasing, but Jimin stopped fucking you to reposition your body with the help of the girl holding you. Now Vanessa was sitting on her knees, your torso on her thigh, and holding your legs back while Jimin’s hands were on your hips, holding them up off the bed. As he continued fucking you, much harder and faster now, your body rocked back and forth against Vanessa’s thighs. And every thrust he gave you was pushing into your g-spot once more. They could both tell you were super close now, and Vanessa almost dropped one of your legs to move her hand towards your clit again until Jimin directed her not to.

“Don’t touch her,” he directed the comment towards Vanessa. “If she wants to cum, she’s gonna do it just like this… fuck,” he groaned.

The feeling of him pressing into your g-spot repeatedly left you shaking, and the sound of his thighs slapping against your ass left your ears ringing. It was like you were feeling everything all at once, but the feelings felt so good that you were numb. As Jimin was fucking you as best as he could and Vanessa was trying to sooth you with her words and light kisses on your forehead, all you could do was yell out any and everything that came to mind about how it felt so good, how it was too much, how you never wanted it to end, and how badly you wanted– needed to come.

And eventually, you did. The feeling was so intense, so overpowering and euphoric that you didn’t even realize you were crying. Or how hard your legs were shaking, or that you had squirted all over your boyfriend’s lower abdomen.

You didn’t register anything that had happened until you heard both Vanessa and your boyfriend cooing at you. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you up towards him and pressing his lips against your own. Vanessa rubbed your back as he hugged you, both of them whispering praises in your ear like no tomorrow.

You were thoroughly fucked out. There was no way you would be able to take anymore and they both knew that. You knew that both Vanessa and Jimin had not cum yet as both of them had been focusing their energy on trying to make you cum. You also knew that Jimin wouldn’t make a move towards her without your permission first, so despite you being tired, you decide to make the first move for them.

“Vanessa, lay down,” you commanded, but your voice came out smaller than you expected it to.

Nevertheless, she laughed before doing as you asked, and you joined her on the bed. Your lips connected and before you knew it, you were in a heated make out session with lip biting and tongue everywhere. You hummed into the kiss before moving your lips down her neck, across her collarbones, and to her breast leaving little kisses in your wake. Your hands found both of her breasts, squeezing and massaging them just to get a feel, as you had never felt a pair that wasn’t your own. And then your lips wrapped around one of her nipples, sucking lightly and then giving the same treatment to the other. One of your hands slid down the rest of her body and found its way to her wet center.

When your cool hands connected with her wet warmth, she let out a deep sigh. You quickly looked back at Jimin, signaling that you wanted him to join you, thus he began kissing Vanessa and playing with her tits as you abandoned them for her pussy. After completely coating your index finger in her wetness, you slid it into her wet hole and heard her moan out even louder, asking you to add in another finger. And you did just that, slowly finger fucking her while moving further down on the bed. You had never touched a girl in this way, and you had never eaten a girl out, but you figured you might as well try it now.

When your face reached her center, you gave her clit a little experimental lick, and you felt her wiggle her hips a bit. She was too occupied with what Jimin was doing with her to give you directions, so you just decided to go for it and wrap your lips around her clit, sucking it harshly.

“Fuck y/n, that’s so good. Just like that please.”

Her little praise motivated you to keep going, changing the angle of your fingers inside of her and eating her out more messily, so much so that her juices were spreading over your face. You looked up to see her jerking your boyfriend off while he was still teasing her nipples. They were both so close, and you wanted them both to cum after they had fucked you so well.

“Jimin, come fuck her,” you said, before going back down to lick her once more.

When his eyes met yours to see that you were 100% okay with it, he obeyed and you switched spots with him. You watched him give himself a few more jerks before lining up with her entrance, but you stopped him with a low ‘wait’ before he could go in. Your eyes met his and you gave him the most sultry look you could muster before you bent down and took his length into your mouth, deepthroating him immediately and keeping your eyes on his the entire time as you began bobbing your head on him as well. You took him out of your mouth and spit on his length, rubbing it up and down on him trying to get him nice and wet.

“Now you can fuck her,” you smirked, letting him go and moving back towards Vanessa. He really never thought that you would be so freaky, and in that moment, Jimin wanted to bend you over and fuck you again, but he figured he would save it for another day.

He slid his cock into Vanessa, stretching her out and watching as she gasped at the feeling.

“Hoy fuck,” she moaned. “My god y/n, your boyfriend feels amazing. So so big. God, I’m not gonna last,” she whined.

“That’s okay,” Jimin started. “I’m not gonna last much longer either,” he said as he started to speed up.

As he was fucking her, you went to sit next to him and watch. You never thought you would be turned on watching your boyfriend with someone else, but the sight in front of you was nothing short of incredible. Who wouldn’t be turned while watching two extremely hot people fuck?

You momentarily stole his attention when you kissed on his neck, prompting him to turn his head and kiss you fully. But you didn’t wanna ruin this for Vanessa, so you broke away from him and crawled closer to her, kissing her again before running a hand down the length of her body before connecting your fingers with her clit. You rubbed fast circles against it, leaving her moaning into your mouth and tightening around Jimin’s cock before her jaw dropped completely.

“Fuck I’m close,” he warned, speeding up his thrusts. “I’m so fucking close. Oh my god.”

“Me too, me too,” Vanessa groaned.

“Y/n, turn around, come here,” Jimin instructed.

And so you changed your position so that you were straddling Vanessa’s stomach, facing Jimin and matching his height at the moment. Your fingers resumed their work on her clit which made her cry out once more, and one of Jimin’s hands moved to wrap around the back of your neck. And while Vanessa began to rub and play with your ass that was in front of her, your boyfriend pulled you in for a kiss while he continued to fuck into the girl below you. Even though he was fucking someone else, his focus was still on you, just like it always was.

And when Jimin began to fuck her harder, hitting all the right spots, she came with a loud “oh shit.” It was the leg shaking, toes curling, eyes rolling back kind of orgasm that Vanessa rarely ever got when she had sex with guys. She became impossibly tight and Jimin slipped out of her while you moved from on top of her to next to her, rubbing her stomach in a soothing manner like she had done for you when you came.

After Vanessa had a quick breather, she pulled you to join her on the floor as you both sat on your knees. You had a feeling that you knew where she was going with this, so you held your hand out for your boyfriend to take, leading him to stand in front of both you and Vanessa. Jimin could’ve cum at the sight below him– two girls that he had fucked and completely wrecked, one of them which he was completely in love with. And his dick was incredibly hard, possibly harder than it had been ever before.

Both you and Vanessa wrapped a hand around him and began stroking him together. And you decided to suck on his tip while Vanessa stroked the rest of his length. Jimin threw his head back in absolute pleasure and let out the loudest moan you’d heard from him yet. His hand found the back of your head, wanting you to lower your mouth a bit, and Vanessa followed your bobbing movements with her hand until she decided to change course and began suckign on his balls. After a few seconds of this, when the feeling became too much, Jimin finally came down your throat with a loud moan of your name as Vanessa was still fondling his balls and until he let go of you fell back to sit on the bed.

You tried your best to swallow the sticky substance, but as all of it didn't end up in your mouth and began dripping on your cheek, Vanessa licked it off of your face before kissing you with tongue to get more.

“Fucking hell..” Jimin sighed, watching the scene before him.

When you finally broke away from the kiss with Vanessa and met his eyes, you giggled before turning back to Vanessa and giving her one last peck. Your boyfriend held out his hand to help you stand up and join him on the bed before offering the same thing to Vanessa. She only stood and then put her hands on her hips, loudly breathing out before looking down at the both of you on the bed. A shy smile spread across your face before you snuggled closer to your boyfriend, and Vanessa just giggled, finding you to be extremely cute.

She excused herself to the bathroom to shower before packing her things up and getting ready to go. You showed her out, hugged her goodbye, and thanked her once again for joining you both.

When she left and you rejoined Jimin, you couldn’t meet his eyes, not after all of the depraved shit you just did. And when you went to sit on the opposite side of the bed, he knew something was up.

“You’re freaking out in your head right now, aren’t you?” he chuckled.

“Well how could I not be freaking out. We just did…. all of.. that!”

“I know,” he whispered, getting up to join you on your side of the bed. He pushed you to lay down and then laid on top of you, forcing you to look him in the eyes. “But you liked it, right? It wasn’t too much for you?” You could hear the concern in his voice.

“No… I did like it. I’m probably gonna be really sore for the next couple of days, but I’d say this experience was worth it,” you laughed.

“Then that’s all that matters, Y/n. That, and the fact that I absolutely love you,” he said.

He kissed you and the smile grew across your face.

You knew that any future experiences you had, whether they be sexual or not, you wanted them all to be with him.

-

Notes: If you’ve read this before it’s because I previously posted and private this twice but OMMMGGG, I’m kinda getting emotional right now because I worked on this fic for over a year and generally haven’t posted in about two years. This is the longest fic I’ve written thus far (also the smuttiest) and I’m kind of proud of it. I can’t promise that I’ll write more but if this story is received well, then I’ll definitely make an effort to try. Hope anyone who comes across this enjoys and PLEASE leave feedback; it’s greatly appreciated! :) Also, I’m also planning to keep this little “series” going and write about more of Y/n’s firsts so stay tuned for that!

Another thing, I have more time in my schedule to write now so IM REOPENING MY REQUESTS! SEND SOME IN PLZ & THNX! 

[emmyrosee]

(not a request, suggestions needed)

Heeyy!!! Just red your post about not requesting characters with vague descriptions. I don't request much from you aside for that recent jealous! Sakusa one (loved it btw, and the Hinata plot twist 👌).

But anyway, girl I'm trying to get back into writing but. . . . THIS SHIT HARD like nearly everything I put down feels like some bull, I'm literally cringing at every word. I can come up with great words choices, and describe writing as a whole like a poet, but sit in front of my computer try to come up with stories for characters and OCs and all of a sudden. . . I'm dumb, the math ain't mathin

Like I cam ewith litt

(I actually took down the post bc I felt bad so even if you had a request I goT YOU POOKIE AHDHDISBSD) IM GLAD YOU LIKED THE JEALOUS!SAKUSA PIECE!! I wanted to make it more so, but I’m not good with jealousy pieces that don’t delve into angst PFFFFFF-

Writing is one of the most relaxing and most difficult aspects of my life, so I COMPLETELY understand. It’s like you have these words and this idea ready to go but there’s something missing, and suddenly you’re lost to it, back at square one, nothing is appealing and you’re ready to never write again.

But let me tell you, writing cheesy self inserts has always, and I mean ALWAYS been there to snap me out. Writing for, quite literally, myself. I write the same trope over and over. I write the same characters, I test the waters with new ones, and I just. Don’t post them. The difference between putting yourself vs an oc for me, is you’re you. You know EVERYTHING about you already, you don’t have to create answers for someone new (which is already a talent yall be so cool with these OC’s 😩🩷). You know what you love in your fruit salads, and you know how long it takes you in the shower. You know how much you do or don’t like a genre of food, and you may or may not know your right from your left without your hands. And that’s the beauty of it. No think, just do, just write.

That’s just my advice! Something that’s always clicked for me- and remember, ultimately we write for ourselves, we see ourselves in the pieces we write for, so you might as well put yourself, quite literally, in them, until you’re satisfied.

Idk. Maybe I’m rambling for nothing JDBDIDNDDIDN-

[wandringaesthetic]

Top 5 JRPGs

So in order to answer this question I had to have a few existential crises. First: what is a JRPG (we just don't know)? I'm going with the more purist answer here since we're narrowing it down to 5. So no action RPGs or tactical RPGs. Second: do I just put down my personal favorites here? because that's going to be 4 Final Fantasy games and idk Suikoden II, probably, and that's not very interesting. I don't really believe in objective quality, but at the moment I find it interesting to take a stab at it or at least name things I think are genuinely very good and polished and have relatively universal appeal. In the end, ugh, whatever, here's a list:

Final Fantasy VII - this is the one that made me fall in love with the genre. I don't have much to say about it that hasn't already been said. I will say, while I mostly like Remake/Rebirth there's something about the original they're never going to catch, and there's a lot to be said about being (relatively) more succinct and focused and leaving some things to the imagination.

Dragon Quest V - This is as good as the UrJRPG series gets. Charming and funny and bright and occasionally tragic. It's about growing up and family and perseverance. It did the monster recruitment thing before Pokemon. I played the Super Famicom version via fan translation and emulation, so I don't know if the remake(s?) of this have quite the same charm. It's helpful for older games to look their age so you can put them in the context of their time, I think. I feel like relatively few people in the west have played this one, which is a shame because it's the missing piece in the influences of Lufia, Earthbound, Chrono Trigger, possibly even Pokemon. Really fun, really solid game that was genuinely touching and made me feel childlike wonder.

Suikoden II - I first played this one when I was in college and Going Through It, and I've been meaning to replay it ever since. So, my memories are a little muddled but I'm going to do my best. Two boys take diverging paths to the same end. A war story that takes on a human scale by developing a huge cast of characters and by having your base grow around you. It takes one of the most interesting middle chapter twists I can think of in a video game. It's one of the best looking and sounding sprite based games to exist. It has an iron chef cooking mini game.

Shadow Hearts Covenant - balances between horror and quirkiness. Atypical setting (in the shadows of IRL World War I). Atypical protagonist with many demons, literal and metaphorical. Really good gameplay. Takes the FFX conditional turn based thing, where you can see the turn order and where some skills alter it, and runs with it. Timed hits, but it's customizable so you can make the system more or less forgiving and balance risk/reward with precise inputs versus guaranteed, but lower, accuracy. Adds up to a really fun game. Vibes are immaculate. Cast is great. But I cannot speak to how good the plot is because I don't remember most of it. It and the rest of the series have never been ported or remade and likely never will be. Keep circulating the tapes.

Chrono Trigger - I mean if you're only going to play one JRPG this is the one. The love child of Final Fantasy and Dragon Quest, with the bright, fun adventure qualities of DQ and the scifi/fantasy fusion and existential angst of FF. Did gameplay stuff it took other games decades to do and did it better. One of the best looking SNES games. The music makes me feel feelings I can't name. I paradoxically think it's overrated even though I'm putting it on the list, because it's not a personal favorite and I don't think anything in the world lives up to the hype around this game. It is very good, however, and a distillation of the genre.