#if i die please make sure i had an influence on people of all kinds.

[clouds-regression]

health hasnt been great recently, sorry for not posting. i love you, you're important, stay safe. i'm so grateful for everyone who shows support to my content. please, please take care of yourself, if you notice anything abnormal, see a doctor before its too late. i love you and appreciate you all.

[yanderes-galore]

Can I request dark soul with platonic yandere lothric and Lorian for the ashen one?

I'll try my best, sure!

BIG Thanks to Dark Souls/Gears Anon for providing me a direction to go in for this! It helps a lot :) 💜

Yandere! Platonic! Elder Prince Lorian + Younger Prince Lothric Concept

(Ashen One! Darling)

Pairing: Platonic - Sharing

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Unhealthy attachment, Manipulation, Clingy behavior, Kidnapping, Isolation, Overprotective behavior, Angst, Soft yanderes, Forced companionship.

Anon brings up a good point, you'd have to know these two beforehand in order for them to have a platonic obsession.

Fate likes to play sick games when it comes to these two.

In your past you served the Twin Princes.

The two have always been neglected and you were the only one to show any kind of care to them.

You could be a childhood friend, maybe they saw you as the parent they never had, somehow they have been attached to you.

Which may have been the reason you were killed.

Their father, Oceiros, was obsessed with making the perfect heirs to continue the Age of Fire.

Seeing you as a poor influence, you were sacrificed to the First Flame.

As you were weak you didn't change much.

Which is what made you an Unkindled, in fact you became The Ashen One.

The princes most likely did not forget about you.

You were close to them and they most likely resent their father for multiple reasons now.

Fate must've been what brought you back to them.

You were brought back because The Flame was not linked by the Twin Princes.

Your journey is what makes you stronger than you were.

Perhaps you were simply some servant before.

But death after death has encouraged you to become stronger.

You fight many foes by the time you see the Twin Princes.

You barely recall them by the time you get past their three guards.

Lothric and Lorian remember you, however.

At first he expects another Unkindled to try and force him into his role, to kill him and his brother.

Which is why he prepares his brother, Lorian, to kill you.

That is until Lorian recalls who you are, even in his changed state.

Lothric does too.

It's strange... you've changed so much.

You've become stronger since their father cast you into the fire.

Lorian says nothing, staring down at you as you remember who these people once were.

However... Lothric sobs.

Lorian quickly responds to his brother's sadness as the younger prince makes gestures to you.

"Drop your weapon and come here! Please, this is not your fate. We will not fight you, my Unkindled."

I imagine Lothric would be the one to quickly scoop you into his arms and embrace you.

Lorian embraces you both and they most likely don't let go for awhile.

For once, according to them, fate had decided to play nice.

After you were torn from them you were given to them again.

You may struggle at first but they refuse to kill or harm you.

Lorian is a defender of both of you in return for your affection, you are their beloved companions.

As the eldest brother he kills any foes who come to harm his brother or you.

Lothric, the sickly man, clings to you as if he's scared to lose you.

He's scared you'll be torn from him again, as a result he clings to you like a child to a toy.

You all may be changed... but they still remember and recognize you.

Many will die before they even think of letting you go.

If you tried to leave them then Lothric may order you caged.

Both princes cling to you as they've had no one else to cling to.

They yearn for some sort of compassion from you, be it a friend or parent.

You'll be treated well here... you'll even be well protected.

All they ask is for you to never leave them again...

For that they'll give you everything you wish as you watch the Era of Fire fizzle out.

[emostudent]

TEEN WOLF BRAINROT

so, i've been rewatching teen wolf bc apparently netflix hates us europeans and it will be removed on may 31st and here are a few of my opinions TM

scott is actually a very good main character. listen, i got into this fandom when i was older, so i probably don't understand why there is this trend of hating scott, but he's a valid MC! he shows an example of positive masculinity that is honestly so refreshing to see in modern media: he's kind, compassionate, always optimistic but not stupidly so, has an amazing relationship with his mum AND his friends, he's not afraid to show emotions and cry. honestly a very healthy, albeit traumatised, young man. yes, he did stupid stuff for the girl he liked, and yes he misjudged a few situations, but please, remind me, how old is he supposed to be? 16? 17? 18? yeah. i did worse things at his age.

scott and stiles come from working class families!!! they have money problems!! it's honestly so refreshing to see teenagers discuss money in a supernatural/fantasy tv show. it doesn't usually happens and I've found it refreshing because it's something that usually happen between irl teenagers.

i don't get sterek. really, really don't. maybe it's bc i've watched the show through a gen z lens (meaning the media and the culture (read: THE INTERNET) when i watched the show were influenced more by gen z than millennials' values) but i really don't get it. and the age difference makes me uncomfortable. (same thing with parrish and lydia, SHE'S A MINOR DUDE, there's a reason people don't like cops istg) SOMEONE EXPLAIN STEREK TO ME PLEASE

in fics stiles and scott's personalities are often swapped: stiles is the caring one, the pack mum, scott is the one with homicidal tendencies. like, my dudes, the fact that scott is a GOOD person through and through is the reason he's a true alpha. also the reason we, as viewers, like stiles is bc he's sarcastic and more morally ambiguous than scott (not really, but you get it, he cares more about himself and his immediate friends, the others can die, scott instead want to save everyone period), it's like taking away the thing that makes stiles stiles

malia and stiles were SO cute, i didn't expect to like them so much, but when they broke up my heart shattered

stydia is everything i want in a ship and i will not accept any criticism on it, it's literally one of the only straight ships i like. you have the slowburn, the malewife x girlboss trope, the he fell first but she fell harder, the mutual pining. it literally checks all of my boxes

isaac was such a cool character and he and scott had an amazing dynamic, like come on, they had something going on between them

kira is a badass. that's it, that's the comment. i like her so much

derek's development is one of the best. i couldn't stand him in season 1, but in s4 he became one of my favourite characters. but i think this has more to do with the fact that they aged him up? he was supposed to be in his early 20s in s1, but then they aged him up in s3? well, anyway, i liked how he literally wised up, stepping into the role of a teacher and guide instead of a leader, it suits him so much better (and i'm sure it's less stressful)

peter is such a charmingly evil bastard. i hate him, but i love him at the same time.

thiam is the best ship in the show, i don't care if it's canon or not. i've read airplanes, it's canon to me

we would've liked (simped for) s5 theo more if he had the same haircut he had in 6b. he was just stupidly hot.

allison and lydia should've kissed and so malia and kira. give me my wlw couples.

[missjomarch]

The Boys

platonic!umich hockey x reader

words: 3.4k

warnings: descriptive SA, swearing, mentions of alcohol, ‘princess’ as a playful/friendly nickname lol

A/N: PLEASE do not read if the things mentioned in the warnings are triggering for you, this is rather detailed and graphic at points. it’s been a really long time (over 2 years) since I’ve written anything creative so please be kind. This was also heavily influence by @yankstrash fic “I’ve Got You” so please go check it out. Enjoy <3

Probably 18+ bc of the SA aspect, read at your own risk

You were drunk. Past drunk, actually. You’re not exactly sure how it happened, but you do know that one minute you were playing flip cup with Nolan and the next the room was spinning. In your defense it was Saturday night - your favorite night.

Despite your friendship with the hockey boys and your current residence in Michigan, hockey wasn’t your favorite sport. Maybe don’t tell the boys that though. Growing up Southern, you were a die hard football fan. Attending the game every Saturday and the party after was one of your favorite routines. And that’s exactly how you ended up here: giggling on the couch of the sophomore house as sweaty bodies lounged around you.

You had met the boys halfway through your freshman year. After being paired with Ethan for a project in your economics class, he had invited you to go out with them. Somewhere between then and now the occasional darty turned into weeknight sleepovers and attending all their games. You loved your boys, and they loved you. They’d do anything for you, and though you didn’t live there the house was equally as much yours as it was theirs.

You were still giggling on the couch, talking with a girl from your leadership class, when Luca plopped down beside you.

“TILLI!!” you gasped, leaning into him.

“Hey y/n/n.” Luca smiled down at you, putting his arm around you. You lifted your head off his chest to bring your mouth closer to his ear.

“You’re my favorite Fantilli brother, but don’t tell Adam. It’ll hurt his feelings,” you whispered to Luca, or at least you thought you did. The alcohol was definitely affecting your volume awareness. Luca let out a laugh at your compliment, giving your waist a squeeze in acknowledgement.

“Okay,” you sighed, “I’m going to get another drink.” You quickly stood up from the couch, only to quickly be yanked back down by Luca.

“Oh no you don’t princess, you’re cut off.” Luca reprimands. A pout quickly makes its way to your face, fake tears already beginning to pool in your eyes.

“Don’t give me that look. Sober you would never say that I was your favorite Fantilli brother, so you’re caught.” You continued to pout as Luca looked down at you.

“Well you’re not exactly helping your case right now, sir,” you slurred, but Luca just shrugged at your threat. You sat in silence for a few minutes with your head tucked into Luca’s chest as he scrolled on his phone.

“Okay, but Lu I actually do really need to use the bathroom. Can you let me up?” You poked at him. He eyed you for a second, looking for that usual mischievous glint. Coming up short, he released his grip on you. You swayed when you stood, but were quickly stabilized by his hand at your elbow.

“Come on, I’ll walk you to the stairs.” Luca stood with you guiding you to the staircase before you waved him off, insisting you could make it up. The upstairs is usually off limits to party guests, as the boys don’t want people in their rooms. You were an exception, of course.

You made your way into the bathroom, quickly doing your business before turning to look in the mirror. After a quick touch-up and a moment of mid-party dissociation, you were ready to return downstairs. Swinging the door open, you begin to walk down the quiet hallway when you someone grabs your wrist. You turn around, expecting to see one of the hockey boys, but are met with a vaguely familiar brunette.

“There you are. I’ve been trying to track you down all night.” He gives you a wide grin, clearly even more drunk than you. At your hesitation, his smile drops a bit.

“You remember me, don’t you? Nathan. We met at the game last week.” The recognition hits you finally. He had been standing behind you at the football game last Saturday, and had asked for your number. You hadn’t really been interested, but before you could say no Ethan had sent him on his way with a “she’s good bro.”

“Oh yeah! I remember now. Sorry about last weekend, sometimes Ethan can be a bit-“

“Don’t worry about it,” Nathan cut you off, “I’m just glad I found you again.” He stepped closer to you now. Pulling on your wrist slightly so your back was facing the stairs. Your face faltered a bit, unsettled by his closeness.

“Speaking of, where’s your boyfriend tonight pretty girl?” Nathan began to pull on your arms a bit, clearly trying to direct you into the darkness of the hallway. You were used to people referring to Ethan as your boyfriend, as you two spent so much time together. But the tone Nathan used left a sour taste in your mouth. You considered lying about this next part.

“He’s actually not my-“ He cut you off again.

“Even better.” Your blood ran cold as Nathan’s eyes darkened. He began pulling you down the hallway to one of the boys’ bedrooms. You struggled against his hold but the fight was futile. He was a foot taller than you and probably a hundred pounds heavier. You began to panic, frantically looking behind you to catch the eye of someone downstairs.

“Come on baby, don’t act like you don’t want me. I saw the look in your eye last weekend before your little boy toy ruined our fun.” Nathan shoved you through the nearest doorway, which happened to be Ethan’s bedroom.

Tears began to run down your face as Nathan slammed the door shut, locking it behind him. There was no escaping this. His hands were on you in an instant, grabbing at anything he could reach as he shoved his lips against yours. You continued to fight again him, even as he shoved you against the door. Your head made a thud against the wood, the impact not helping your dizziness. You found yourself regretting ever drinking at all, the alcohol in your system only adding to your disorientation.

“Please,” you whispered, a sob making its way into your throat as he moved his lips down your neck.

“What was that? You want more?” Nathan drawled into your ear. You frantically shook your head no, begging him to get off. Your shoves and scratches did nothing to deter him. His hands found their way to your chest, grabbing at your boobs. You heard the fabric rip before you even felt the cool air hit your chest. He had ripped your tank top in half, exposing your chest to him. You thrashed in his hold, desperately trying to cover yourself.

“No no, none of that baby.” Nathan cooed, trying to get his hold back on you. When you finally stopped fighting his hold, he moved back to kiss you. You spat in his face then, your last act of defiance. Nathan’s face screwed up in anger.

“You stupid bitch-“ your cheek was suddenly burning. You barely registered the hand he was lowering as you stood there dumbfounded. He had slapped you - hard. You knew it was going to leave a mark as the tears began to well up in your eyes all over again.

Nathan was still grumbling to himself as he dragged you towards Ethan’s bed. He flung you onto the mattress you had spent so many nights on already. You weren’t sure you’d ever be able to sleep here again. His hands were back on you now, and you began to search the room for anything that could help you. You knew E had an extra stick in here but where was it? Damn it y/n think. It wasn’t anywhere you could visibly see it, but you vaguely remembered him saying something once about it being being under the bed.

Nathan began to pull off of you to strip his clothes. It was now or never. Praying Ethan still had that damn stick under the bed , you quickly rolled on your side. Shoving your hand under the bed, you fumbled around for a half second before finding purchase on something. You retracted, the stick in your hand. Thank God. Nathan was turning back around, and that’s when you swung. It wasn’t a hard hit, but when blade met his nose blood went flying. Ethan cursed, hands flying to his now shattered nose. You threw the stick to the side, bolting up and towards the door before Nathan regained awareness. You felt his hand swipe at you, just narrowly missing your wrist.

Unlocking the door, you escaped into the hallway. You quickly crossed your arms over your bare chest, barely remembering to cover yourself before you sprinted down the stairs. You were a sight to behold: shirt ripped in half, a bruised and tear stained cheek, and wild eyes. You desperately looked around for any of the boys, knowing Nathan would be following behind you at any moment. More tears began to fall as you searched the house, squeezing past the same sweaty bodies you were laughing with earlier. You were rounding the corner to the kitchen when you slammed into something solid. Hands quickly gripping your arms to keep you upright. You looked up to find Mark, looking down at you with a smile that quickly dropped when he met your eyes.

“What happened?” He asked, panic finding its way into his voice. You were in hysterics, terrified of Nathan finding you. You were babbling to Mark, unable to form a coherent sentence.

“Hey, slow down.” He cooed, a hand finding your shoulder. You jumped at his touch, quickly shoving yourself further into him. Mark wrapped his arms around you. If he wasn’t concerned before, he definitely was now. Looking down at you, he finally noticed the state of your shirt. His heart dropped instantly. He pulled you closer to him to hide you as he looked over his shoulder to the group of boys watching you from the other side of the kitchen.

“Hey! Hughesy!” Mark shouted to Luke from where he held you. “Go find Eddy.”

Luke nodded quickly, taking Rutger with him as he left.

“You’re alright, y/n/n,” Mark rubbed your back, “Luke is going to find E, okay?” You couldn’t do more than nod. Knowing that until your best friend arrived, you weren’t leaving Mark’s arms. A few minutes later, you heard Ethan loudly entering the kitchen. Luke, Rutger, and Duker following closely behind.

“What do you mean she’s crying? I just saw…” Ethan’s loud voice trailed off as he saw you in Mark’s hold, your hands covering your ears as the tears continued to fall. “Fuck,” he breathed.

Ethan quickly approached the two of you, his hand coming to rest lightly on the back of your head. You jumped again, opening your eyes to meet his. You left Mark’s arms immediately, only to run straight to Ethan’s.

“Hey princess, what’s going on?” Using the boys’ shared nickname for you, he began to rub up and down your back. Mark gave him a quick run down of how he found you, and pointing out the state of your tank top. Ethan looked down, and immediately saw red. The hand shaped bruise on your cheek and shredded material of your shirt told him everything he needed to know. But he wouldn’t move without your confirmation.

Ethan leaned down further to reach your ear, “I know you’re scared, but I’ve got you y/n/n. I need you to tell me what happened.”

You looked up at him then, seeing the hard set of his clenched jaw as he took in your tear stained cheeks.

“He touched me.” You barely whispered, throat raw from crying. Ethan’s anger only grew as you confirmed his suspicions.

“Who?” He asked.

“The guy from the game last week.”

Ethan remembered. The asshole had threatened him when you left for the bathroom, and Ethan had ran him off. He looked up, searching the room for Nathan’s face. He could still feel you trembling in his arms.

“I hit him,” you managed to make out. Ethan’s head snapped back to you, brows furrowed.

“That’s how I got away,” you mumbled, “he was bleeding.” Ethan’s heart broke at the weakness in your voice. You were never a violent person, and for someone to drive you to that point… Ethan was going to kill him.

Mark and the other boys were on standby, waiting for Ethan’s plan.

“Where was he y/n/n? We’re going to handle this.” Ethan questioned, glancing towards Mark to indicate his next move was to find the little bitch.

“Upstairs.”

Ethan nodded, turning to Mark and instructing him to find the guys who weren’t already in the kitchen. The boys already gathered there had unintentionally formed a circle around you, guarding you from prying eyes. Ethan had them all turn around as he shucked off the sweatshirt he was wearing and slipped it over you to cover your exposed front. You would’ve said thank you, but you didn’t need to.

Mark finally returned with the rest of the guys, and Ethan began forming a course of action. You watched as he assessed the team that had assembled.

“E, please don’t leave.” You begged, your hands balling up the material of his shirt. Your voice becoming unsteady again at the thought of being alone.

“I’m not gonna leave you alone princess, but I’ve gotta go handle this. Can you stay with Luca? Just for a few minutes, I promise.” You looked to your right, where Luca stood waiting with his arms open and a comforting smile gracing his features. You nodded to Ethan, and he released his grip on you as you moved towards the freshman.

Luca quickly wrapped you up in his arms again, giving you a sense of protection. Rutger, Adam, and Duker were going to stay with you while Ethan took Mark, Luke, and Moyle with him to find Nathan. You watched as Ethan whispered something to Adam on his way out of the kitchen.

“We’ve got her man.” Adam nodded to Ethan, confirming that they wouldn’t let you out of their sight. Luca was backed into a corner of the kitchen with you in his arms, the other three boys in front of you blocking you from the rest of the party.

“You want to go somewhere less crowded?” Luca whispered to you. You nodded, not trusting your voice. The boys began to lead you out of the kitchen to the back patio, before sliding the door closed behind you all.

You’re unsure how long you stood outside in Luca’s arms, unsure how long you listened to him make small talk with Adam and Duker. But after a while their soft whispers and the soft thump of Luca’s heartbeat lulled you into a more languid state. Eventually Ethan returned with Mark, but Luke and Moyle no where to be found. You tried to ignore the bruises already gracing Ethan’s knuckles as he ran a hand down your arm. A silent conversation passed between the boys around you, as Ethan pulled you from Luca’s arms.

“Come on, princess. Let’s go get you fixed up, yeah?” You nodded, numbly. The alcohol had long since worn off, and your drunken state was replaced with a lethargic drag. The fact that it was almost 3 in the morning didn’t help.

Ethan practically carried you through the house and towards the stairs. The freshman broke off to begin clearing the remaining party-goers from the living room, and you saw Luke and Moyle re-entering the house as you passed by the front door. Ethan must have had them on escort duty, a nice way of saying they kicked Nathan out on his ass after whatever occurred upstairs. They gave Ethan a tight nod and then followed behind you up the stairs. When you reached the top, Ethan began leading you towards his room. Your eyes widened as you took in the blood stained carpet and the hockey stick lying beside it. Ethan could feel you tense up in his arms as you silently begged him not to take you in there. Feeling you turn towards him in his arms, he looked down at you and placed a hand on your non-bruised cheek.

“It’s okay, we don’t have to go in there,” Ethan assured. He had been beyond pissed when he followed the blood trail into his room. Not because it would stain the carpet, but because it filled him with impossible guilt. Though he knew it wasn’t his fault, the fact that he wasn’t able to protect you in his own home, his own room. It filled him with rage.

“She can sleep in my room tonight, I don’t mind to take the couch.” Mark offered instead, opening the door and ushering you and Ethan through. Once you were settled on the edge of the bed, Mark turned to leave. He closed the door behind him, letting you know they’d be waiting outside.

Once the door was shut, Ethan turned to you silently. Kneeling down in front of where you sat at the end of the bed, he took your hands in his.

“Look at me princess,” Ethan all but whispered. The emotion of the night finally catching up with him, he feared you might break if he spoke any louder.

You finally lifted your teary eyes to meet his, inhaling sharply at the devastation set in his features. His hand came up to brush strands of hair out of your face. You winced slightly as his hand pasted over the bruise from the blow Nathan had dealt you, and Ethan’s jaw tightened.

“He’ll never even look at you again, I promise. I’ll kill him if he even tries.” Ethan swore, trying to remain gentle despite the anger still coursing through him. Silent tears began streaming down your face for what felt like the millionth time.

“I’m sorry, “ you muttered to him through your tears, hands tightening around his. Ethan’s brows furrowed as you continued.

“I was drunk and maybe he thought-“

“Absolutely not,” Ethan cut you off, “you’re not in the wrong here. He had no right to put his hands on you no matter how drunk you are or the level of interest you expressed. If you looked anything like how I found you downstairs it should’ve been obvious to him that you didn’t want that. He knew what he was doing princess, this isn’t your fault.” You nodded your head, leaning down to wrap your arms around Ethan’s neck. He moved to sit on the bed, allowing you to rest in his lap as you trembled.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there,” Ethan mumbled into your hair. You shook your head, removing your head from his neck to look at him.

“Not your fault, you didn’t know,” you mumbled, “thank you for protecting me.”

“Always, princess.”

———

That night you slept in Mark’s room with Ethan next to you, drowning in various pieces of clothing the boys lent you for the night. Mark took Ethan’s room instead of the couch, after 20 minutes of you insisting that he was too tall to sleep on the couch.

The next morning, you woke up to the boys (attempting) to make breakfast for you downstairs. As you watched them struggled, Luca texted to let you know he was already out getting a backup breakfast for when they inevitably burned the pancakes. You smiled slightly at your friends thoughtfulness. He returned with your favorite coffee and bagel order from the shop down the street just as the other boys finally gave up on their culinary dreams.

“Hey,” Duker pouted from his place in front of the stove, “I thought you had more faith in us than that.”

You laughed at his feigned hurt, rising from your seat to thank him for his attempt. You ate your bagel as the boys found their own various breakfast replacements, and you all spent the morning laughing in the kitchen over stories. No one brought up the previous night, and you knew no one would make you talk about it if you didn’t want to. But you didn’t fail to notice how Ethan stood a bit closer than normal, and how Mark and Luke were always between you and the door. Eventually you’d tell them about it - probably Ethan first -but not today.

Though you were still a bit paranoid, something you knew wouldn’t go away anytime soon, your heart was full of love for your boys. Knowing the extents to which they’d go to protect you made you love them all the more.

[flokali]

NPC | Idia Shroud

Warnings: Yandere, obsessive and possessive behavior, stalking, inappropriate actions, low-self esteem and self-hatred, Idia-focused, he’s a creep, Grim slander (I love you, Grim, I’m sorry...). Ask to tag!

 A/N: It’s kind of short but it’s ¿fine? since it’s mostly be getting into the groove of writing for TWST... hahah, right??

Idia is such a loser, at least that’s what he thinks. He’s a shut-in, doujin-addicted, otaku who forgets to take care of himself and eat food that doesn’t consist of greasy chips and borderline toxic energy drinks, who has been wearing the same clothes for a week straight even though there’s a questionable stain smack in the middle of his shirt; the only reason anyone would look at him more than once would be to make sure they weren’t imagining a 1’83, messy and scrawny weeb making his way around campus.

But things change, outside influences - both positive and negative - have impacts on people's lives whether we want them to or not. When you came around, a curious non-magical human wandering around campus, how was Idia supposed to remain the same?

He became unbearably self-conscious, sure - he was never quite a fan of who he had become but it never got to this point, with you on his mind all of the time, how was he supposed to live with himself? He knew he was no better than a stupid, sidequest NPC in your story, a character you’d interact with to boost a certain skill level once every few events to clear a new stage. No, he wasn’t like Vil or Malleus, those guys were obviously meant as love interests, coded into your life to romance you and sweep you off your feet, meanwhile Ace and Deuce clearly had their script for the BFF trio with you installed early on, and that’s not even scratching the surface when it comes to the people in NCR; amongst such a wide and diverse, and clearly attractive, cast - you had to wonder what was supposed to come out of a character like him?

He tried cleaning himself up, showering a bit more and trying to wash his clothes and not wear the same two shirts on rotation, but he still felt off. You still didn’t pay attention to him, you still never once glanced his way and it was starting to become unbearable, it was as if for each passing hour you didn’t notice him, his need for you and your attention grew.

Idia wondered what he’d tell Ortho if he ever found about the cameras he had installed all over Ramshackle Dorm, how would he explain the ones nestled in your bathroom near your shower or the ones out with a more intimate view of your bed? But it was okay, Idia rationalized, Ortho would understand — he had been supportive up until now, right? He’d understand that his older brother didn’t stand a chance and that this was the only way for him to get close to you.

Whatever, Idia thought to himself one day as he walked through the crowded college halls, even if you did notice him, who's to say you’d be interested in him? With his luck, you probably already figured out he was the freak who installed all those cameras in your dorm — wait, did you even know about them? Ugh, he wanted to die, just thinking about it had him insulting himself for being such a creep; whenever he was alone in his room it all felt so natural but whenever he thought about it anywhere else he couldn’t help but feel like a degenerate. That’s what he was, he felt his chest tighten at the thought, a creepy nobody stalking the person they liked like some serial killer — no amount of showers, clean clothes, and slightly cleaner rooms would ever make up for the fact he was a creep who stalked you.

“Ah, there you are,” Idia’s breath hitches as he hears your voice, perfect, he bitterly thought, to add insult to injury the universe would now have him presence an exclusive cutscene with you and a love interest just to rub in the fact he didn’t have a chance with you, “hey, wait up! Please, Idia, right?”

It’s like the world stops as he hears his name come out of your pretty lips, he feels like he’s on cloud nine as he feels your hand reach out to touch his shoulder — he must have died, he thinks, and this was heaven, during his commute he probably tripped and fell and hit his head against something and since no one would help a loser like him he was left to die, there was no other reason for an angel such as yourself to reach out to him.

“Idia, are you alright?” You let go of him before making your way to look him in the face, “Oh, I-I’m sorry, I just stopped you out of nowhere and you probably had things to do…”

“Yes, I mean no,” he mutters under his breath, you had stopped him out of nowhere but he didn’t have anything to do, even if he did it would realistically be waiting for you to arrive home so he could watch you through the cameras, “it’s fine… y-you’re from Ramshackle Dorm, aren’t you?”

“Yes,” you smile, the previous frown in your face gone as you realize he wasn’t mad at you, “I’m sorry for approaching you like this out of nowhere but Azul told me you were really good with technology and, well…”

Oh, Azul… he knew the two of you interacted, he’d heard quite a lot about you through the “business man” (though he was often times more like a scammer, Idia thought), but that didn’t mean he liked the sound of his name out of your mouth; he’d much rather only hear his.

“I’ll just get to it,” you shake your head, “Grim said he’d found these little cameras all over our dorm, mostly in the common eras, it really freaked us out and I was wondering if maybe you could help us?”

You had found the cameras - they had lasted a good run, almost three and a half months, but that little grimy, irritating thing that called itself Grim had to find them, perfect. Amazing, spectacular - just what he needed… It truly was just what he needed.

“O-oh? H-how so?” Idia really didn’t know what exactly he was asking if he was honest, it was as if his lips were on auto-pilot, functioning without his brain’s permission.

“Well, we’d like to take them off,” you say, “but I think we should also figure out who put them there, for safety and… stuff. That’s where you’d come in, Azul said you were super good doing things like that.”

Take them off? No way, he wanted to laugh and then burst into tears  just thinking about it, if he took them off he’d basically be cutting off the only source of direct - term loosely used - contact with you, however; if he was the one who would help you then it meant he could just use it as an opportunity to hide the cameras better and even set up better equipment, right? Plus, he’d be in your dorm, in your room, that’s basically an off-the-limits zone for him most of the time but if you invited him over you’re basically giving him a cheat sheet.

“I… I guess I could try,” he’s really trying to act as cool as possible while overheating, if he were a machine he’d probably need to be unplugged and let to rest because the heat rushing through his body the longer he conversed with you couldn’t be healthy, but this was an incredibly valuable opportunity and he couldn’t let his virgin attitude fuck it up, “but I’d need to come over to y-your place and get it checked out m-myself… ifyoudontmind.”

“Sure,” he can see the way his words lighten up your smile, Idia can’t help the swell of pride that bubbles in his chest when he sees the positive effect he’s just had on you, “would tomorrow be okay?”

“Yeah, sure.” He’s hoping the curt, blunt responses are working - he needs to seem like a cooler, more leveled up version of himself lest he speaks too much and ends up babbling on about how he’s got a drawer filled with your items he regularly talks to.

“Ah, thank you so much!“ You smile widely, already feeling a weight lift off your shoulders at the prospect of finally getting rid of those cameras, “See you tomorrow, Idia!”

“Yeah… see you.” The flamed-hair boy couldn’t help the wicked smile that overtook his features, sharp teeth basically shining he saw your figure disappear into the crowd. So sweet and trusting, you truly were too good to be in such a school, this place was filled to the brim with predators, didn’t you know? And you had basically invited one of them into your home. Maybe you wanted this, Idia thought to himself as he hurriedly made his way to his dorm – he’d just skip the remaining classes and work on his new equipment for you, he still can’t believe it, he’s giddy just thinking about it, you inviting him over to your place, that’s basically flirting with him, you know?

He’d just have to make sure the next batch would be more discreet so neither you or that pest would find them.

He easily spends the next couple of hours planning where to hide the newer, smaller cameras - which he’d personally designed to make as high quality and discreet as possible -, he already had a few spots planned out, mainly new locations in your room and bathroom alongside the halls, kitchen, and some other rooms he’s seen you frequent. As he tinkered the hours away, awaiting for the time to finally head over to your place, he was left alone with his thoughts.

At first, he couldn’t deny being scared and highly irritated that his cameras had been found out, who wouldn’t be? Those cameras were not only incredibly expensive and high-tech but those were practically Idia’s only way to experience you comfortably. Not just that, but the fact it was Grim of all things to reveal their existence just adds insult to injury - that furball ended up ruining months worth of you-time and hours upon hours of effort. But the more he thought about it, the more blessed the situation seemed to become; this was a perfect opportunity to change systems, go for even higher quality video and cameras and even include a recording system, and to finally change his status from nameless NPC to primary love interest. Yes, that’d be nice, just thinking about it has the tips of his hair flaring pink and a blush forming upon his deadly-pale skin; he’d make sure to change the whole script, just for you, he wouldn’t tolerate any rival love interests anymore and he wasn’t going to let himself remain a side character.

[crayistic]

I needed to come somewhere to rant.... so here it is. Critical role Campaign 3 Episode 77 spoilers ahead so please don't read if your not wanting spoilers.

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First of all want to say the episode was brilliant, in terms of the story and the hopefully future animation for sure. However I have so many issues.... I have seen alot of people and shippers getting g happy about the fact thatAshton kissed Fearne... and saying things like he is being the barbarian and is wanting to be the one to take the pain and damage... so on and so forth and I couldn't disagree with this more.

First of all, from a players perspective... i know there is trust and love between the crit cast and they are all about support and aftercare... but thus choice by ashton as a player with other players made me feel quite uncomfortable. It was such a horrible place to put Ashley in and it was easy enough to see how angry and how rediculous most of the cast thought the choice was. Not only that but Matt himself making comments about how he gave them clear warnings. It would jave been less painful for others if he had let Fearne take the shard (or gave her some support or time to think about it for herself) that put her and the others through what he did. He knew how risky it was and he was very prerered to die, so anyone saying he was doing it for his friends? Like what... how? Because the pain of losing someone and having to carry that with you, when you also played a part in it MAJORLY out weights phitjcal pain. Then chockyness with the end result when it was all fluke and luck. If it wasn't for fearnes spell and randomly swaping the ring with chet... yes these are all great story points but I do think he crossed the line alittle.

Now the missed opportunity for the story. Mat wad clearly setting up the emperor and empress, giving them clear signs and opportunities to gain power for two of the bells hells. Now what? Will ashton be completely OP, and how is that fair to the other characters. Mat is now going to have to find away to limit him and again yes, the game is about the players, not everything goes to plan and things can change in an instant but again I do think there are lines. If he had died, there is a big change Ashley would have blamed herself for saying she didn't want the shard (however i also think she was influenced by Tals persistent pushing and comments for him to have it). I was really looking forward to seeing what it would be like to have two of them tighed to eachother by ancient power and what that would mean for them. Not to mention how stressed and upset she was at the table, I get that shit can happen in game but when another player is doing it to you without any type of warning for over 40 mins of play... it seemed abit messed up.

Moving into the shipping aspect of things. I'm a lover of romance in d&d and I had a forst class ticket aboard the Imogen/Laudna and the Fearne/Ashton boat. I was looking forward to being able to see Fearnes vulnerable side. She is usually so ladeda about flirting, intimacy and so on but this... this was kind of gross and it almost felt like she was being used and manipulated. While this could have been tal not recognising fearne was going down that path for ashton and him rushing to implement things last moment or whatever was going on... it just felt wrong.

Out of nowhere he's calling her hot after she's referencing him saying he wants a sister... and the horrible thing is you can tell she has feelings for him because ots almost like she is to wrapped up in the slight attention that she doesn't even see how he's acting. Saying she's hot while lased in the request to lie to all of their friends, aid him in doing something stupid, very much from the begning never planning on fearne having the shard... saying how he trusts her more?... It felt like love bombing to confuse her and get her to do what he wanted. Her returning his hot comment and running away... there was no recognition to how she doesn't normally act like that... what did it mean and so on, he just sat back and made a cocky comment

Then the whole thing, grabbing her and kissing her right before it happened. He actually made a comment saying to just do it because it will never happen again and it's the only one she gets. Like imagin if you actually loved or was falling fir someone... it felt like she was nothing but a tool and none of the others would do it for him because it was fucking STUPID but fearne also wouldn't have done it to any oof the others... so what's the difference? Well maybe ots the fact she has feelings for him. The people saying he wanted to do it to take the pain over his friends... I just don't get it. His actions were nothing but selfish. Doing something so crazy and actually telling people to heal him. Saying he needed this like having one shard wasn't enough. Putting fearne in that position, someone he clearly knows cares for him more than a friend and she had to stand there and watch him fucking shatter into pieces and come back... nearly dying over and over and worst of all at the aid of her own hands. Now I don't see how they could have any chance of a romance because he kicked it in the ass before it even began... or he doesn't even see her that way and did completely use her... because if it was the only kiss she was getting... then why do it unlessbyour trying to love bomb her?...

It was all abit twisted and fucked uo to me and I really don't know how to actually feel about the whole thing... definitely the most controversial point of bells hells to me. Oh man what I would give to be a fly in the wall after that. The following pics sums up my emotional roller coaster through that ep....

[catholic-character-tournament]

Round 1 - Resurrect Bracket (Losers Bracket) Side B

ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to [make it to the finals]

Propaganda below ⬇️

Kirei

He fucked up so many people's lives so badly in just one decade (not on purpose) that the universe put him in the summoning pool of all world influencing souls. He doesnt really have any special powers but he does serve as a vessel for rasputin at one point. He's the guy who says "people die when they are killed"

please please please there's literally a type moon character in the gif on the top of this form so it's typemoonphobic if none of them get in but it shouldn't be her it should be kirei bc he's 50x funnier & more iconic than jeanne. funny lil murder priest who's fucking THE gilgamesh (from the epic of) in the church basement and dies in a knife fight w a 17 year old whose dad he wanted to fuck back in '94 before realizing that he was actually kinda lame and he's been bitter abt it ever since. he has an orphan torture factory in his basement but he's also canonically good at being a priest. he's so funny you should def try his mapo tofu i swear it's totally safe for human consumption and not made with any california reapers. did i mention he's a deadbeat dad.

View on Twitter

Priest claims to be Pro Life to make Sakura Matou the most miserable girl on the planet, but he dies anyway.

bro became a catholic because he loves suffering

He’s a priest. Kind of. Not a very good priest obviously. There is something seriously wrong and fucked up with that man. It’s so entertaining.

he's gotta be one of the most insane catholic men ever with a very in-depth and interesting relationship with his religion and his relationship with god also he's the sexiest man ever to be conceptualized in the known universe and all of time

Will never forget the 40+ minute monologue in heavens feel being a thinly veiled metaphor for abortion

he wants to torment churchgoers and make them face their failures and suffering but all he ends up doing is motivate them to improve themselves. cringefail moment for him

he's absolutely insane. the coldhearted mercenary that barely reacts to anything is terrified of kirei. he's super fucked up. his ult in stay night is literally him channeling divine power into something called kyrie eleison. he's the vessel of rasputin (on account of being a priest with a huge....no i shant say) the biblical beast in grand order among other things. he gets drunk with and tops gilgamesh from the epic of gilgamesh in the church basement after gilgamesh from the epic of gilgamesh bats his eyes a little too hard at kirei in some of the horniest shot scenes ive ever seen. he also used to be a heretical "fixer" for the church, cleaning up scenes that would expose shit to the public. uhh what else. he holds cool swords between his fingers like a kid pretending to be wolverine but in my favorite route he just squares the hell up with the protagonist and they fight to the death outside planned parenthood

Soap

Religious trauma coded. Popular hc that his family is Catholic.

He's gay and has a funny hair cut. Is that not enough to be Catholic?

he was such a bad bitch they had to kill him off in the third game bc he would've mopped the floor with the main antagonist otherwise. rip soap keep thotting it up in heaven we miss u every day

`!!!6ths -- propaganda by my kitten

[kiiromaru]

THH's Moral Alignement and Reasoning

[spoiler for danganronpa 1]

disclaimer: I haven't read the novels, also these aren't character analysis, just my reasoning for why i put them in this category, also please add onto it if you disagree or have anything to say ^^

Lawful Good

Sakura Ogami: She always takes decisions that she considers to be the best for the people around her : trying to proctect her dojo by accepting to work with Monokuma or committing suicide and making sure to write a letter explaining to everyone why she did it as to resolve the situation and create a more peaceful atmosphere among them.

Kyoko Kirigiri: She has good intentions and i feel like what pushes her to act is kind of a "i can do it therefore i should do it" mindset.

Chihiro Fujisaki: Cute baby sunshine, never did anything wrong in their life.

Ishimaru Kiyotaka: He's the Ultimate Moral Compass, pretty self-explanatory.

Naegi Makoto: A genuinely good person who tries his best to be kind.

Neutral Good

Aoi: We can see during chapter 4 that she put her personal beliefs above all else but even if she tried to kill everyone i still think that she is a good person.

Toko (Ultra Despair Girl): If we were talking solely about THH i would've put her in Neutral Evil since she doesn't care about anyone but herself and is pretty mean (also something that i find very interesting during the 4th trial is that even if throughout the game she seems totally devoted and in love with Byakuya + her obvious lack of self esteem she still chose to defend herself when she thought Genocide Jack had killed Sakura which could've led to his death), but the character development she gets in that game is golden so yeah.

Chaotic Good

Mondo: Feel free to disagree with me on that because of the fact that he killed Chihiro who very much did not deserve it but contrary to what Naegi says in the game it absolutely wasn't a cold blooded murder, himself stating that he blacked-out while killing them. I still chose to put him in good because otherwise he really tried to do the right thing (protecting Chihiro's secret by moving their body or even when in the anime he covered Mukuro's bldy with his coat it showed that he was a kind person) + we also know that he uses his influence to minimize tensions between gangs.

True Neutral

Byakuya: I feel like his god complex makes him kind of uncapable to relate to other people and consider their struggles on the same level as him so he doesn't care about anyone + we saw during the 2nd trial that he definitely can't be described as a good person. I truly feel like he couldn't care less about rules or moral implications as he considers himself above it.

Leon: His actions only seem to be motivated by what he wants in that moment without a lot of reasoning behind it, like changing from baseball to music or killing Sayaka when he could've totally ran away after she tried to kill him.

Chaotic Neutral 

Sayaka : I feel like she's morally neutral in the way where she's so goal-oriented that she doesn't care too much about the means to get to an end (which is also implicate in her backstory) but she's aware that what she does might bad : she was willing to let everyone die and pin the crime on Naegi but once her plan failed she still made sure to save everyone instead by writing Leon's name.

Yasuhiro : I hesitated to put him in chaotic evil because of the fact that he quite literally could have/tried to kill Sakura + he never was particularly kind to no one in the game and tried to steal money from us during his free time (tbh im still kinda mad at the wasted potential of making him a nice chill guy but well). In the end i went for neutral because i feel like its more a case of picking the worst possible choice than being a bad person, even if he is quite selfish.

Lawful Evil 

Hifumi: The reason i put him in "lawful" is because what convinced him to kill Ishimaru was Celestia accusing him of SA, which is an understandable reason especially paired with the chance to get out happy and with Celestia but he was still willing to sacrifice everyone to get out so lawful evil it is.

Neutral Evil

Celestia Lundenberg: It was pretty complicated but i settled on this alignement if we take the things she tells us at face value (since i've seen a few people saying that she wasn't actually trying to win the game and that's why her plan was so sloppy). I don't feel like she's a bad person but she doesn't care about doing bad things to get what she wants.

Mukuro Ikusaba: That's where me not reading the novels probably makes a difference because i know that she gets more development there but based on the game and the anime i have to put her here, even if she was obviously manipulated by Junko she still seemed to agree with her.

Chaotic Evil

Junko Enoshima: Do i really need to explain ?

Genocide Jack: I mean, she enjoys killing people and has no other reason for what she does.

Thank you if you read all of that, sorry for any typos/grammar mistakes, english isn't my first language and i wrote it all in one go. Please tell me what you think :)

[sketching-shark]

If you could reboot LMK how would you do it

WAUGH I could go on at length about this but I guess my main changes would be

A) LOWER THE GOSH DERN STAKES/ LET SUN WUKONG SHOULDER MORE OF THE BURDEN IN A COMPETENT MANNER

Said before that my favorite season of Monkie Kid was the first one mainly because its lower stakes and lighter tone meant that an episode's concern could be wrapped up in a satisfying manner in a 10-minute time period. But given Everything that's happened since then, the now routine world-exploding stakes of the past few seasons seasons are really starting to grate not just because it means one horrific trauma after another for MK and his allies but because the reasons that they happen end up re-enforcing the idea that Sun Wukong--even though he does obviously run around like mad trying to do everything he can to make things better once things have gotten to a really bad point and even though he doesn't ever intend for things to get as horrible as they do--is a genuinely terrible mentor, leader, and friend and an overall bad influence in MK's life. As such, I think that doing a more low-stakes monster-of-the-week formula with a focus on MK & co. with Sun Wukong mostly in the background doing other things but with a decent presence in the foreground to sincerely help when things got tougher for the Monkie Kid could create a good balance between keeping the spotlight on Qi Xiaotian and his allies in their adventures while still letting Sun Wukong be a caring and competent shifu.

B) LESS MYSTERY-MONGERING PLEASE

There's been much fun made of those who act like a plot not revealing all of its mysteries from the first makes for a bad story, and for very good reason. HOWEVER, in Monkie Kid's case I think that it could really benefit from answering some of its big questions earlier on so that characters could deal with them and move forward in their development. For example, I'd love to see an arc that's all about why the Demon Bull King and Sun Wukong had their big battle in the first place and what the ongoing consequences of it are. This could give them a real chance to confront how it's still negatively affecting them and their relationships in the present (Sun Wukong with his refusal to even try to forge new friendships & tendency to push people away, the Demon Bull King with taking out his anger on everyone and everything, even his own son) and maybe even let them ultimately move forward knowing that they can't be sworn brothers again but they can be better and happier people. I'd also love to see an arc that's focused on Sun Wukong telling Qi Xiaotian flat-out what happened to the other pilgrims that resulted in their deaths and the failure of the westward journey, and also that if he doesn't want to be the Monkie Kid any more with that information then he doesn't have to. tbh I think it would be great if MK's hero worship was shattered BUT ALSO came with the reality that if he didn't want to fight yaoguai any more then it wouldn't mean all of reality would explode because he actually could depend on Sun Wukong to keep the situation from getting that bad. So then Qi Xiaotian does go back to his normal life for awhile, but is still irrevocably changed by the knowledge that there's all this danger out there that the Monkey King is confronting alone. I think this kind of arc could conclude with a really neat reflection of the "we are all capable of being Sun Wukong" idea with MK, the whole monkie crew, and others ultimately coming together to help save the Monkey King and each other with some issue in a refutation of the idea that you have to suffer and die to atone and also be a "it takes the world to save the world" sort of story.

C) MORE MONKEYS. MORE ALLIES. MORE FRIENDS.

Fore sure I'd make at least some members of the og classic's Mt. Huaguoshan troop along with Sun Wukong's og sworn brotherhood be characters in legoland. There's a number of really cool things you could do with them, but personally I'd make it so that their presence and role in the narrative acts as something of a response to the yaoguai battles in the og classic. I think it would be cool if for at least a few episodes an issue isn't solved by beating the yaoguai in question but by finding some creative alternative to the issue at hand that would also show the moral grayness of other characters as well as let MK & Sun Wukong himself flex some of the Monkey King's less utilized abilities and powers. For example, maybe the monkie crew responds to a call for help about ferocious storms at a sea port. And when they get there, they discover that this is the work of the Dragon Flood King, one of the Monkey King's former sworn brothers. And once this is revealed, then we have to deal with the situation where one of the big reasons the Dragon Flood King is doing this is because back before he met Sun Wukong he was kicked out of the dragon king family for being "ugly"/deformed in some way (I did see a post suggesting that this is a headcanon in China), and now that the warlord days are over he's been surviving by doing a version of what Ao Guang did for centuries in creating a weather-based protection racket where humans are forced to give him offerings or else he causes floods. And besides the interesting issues this could open up with Long Xiaojiao and her own family, then we ultimately don't solve this by beating the Dragon Flood King until he disintegrates, but by Sun Wukong and MK acting as mediators between the dragon and a few rain and storm gods so that the Dragon Flood King ultimately finds a new home in a desert oasis that the monkie crew helps him create.

Also I think it would be cool if MK got more friends in the form of some of the youngsters from the Mt. Huaguoshan monkey yaoguai troop.

Just a few sketchy thoughts! I honestly do think that there's so many cool and interesting things one could do with Monkie Kid's premise.

[villain-life]

The mean hero

Cw: blood, slightly spicy

• Inspired by a prompt i found somewhere (can’t remember whose, but credit to them)

The villain was ready: they wore a leather jacket, guns were hidden in their pants, knives in their pockets, a cigarette in their mouth. That’s exactly how the criminal was going to enter a big room, full of people that would have been killed by them minutes later. The people were a bunch of powerful heroes that were imprisoned by their team, all of them had special strengths. That’s why, the villain thought that maybe closing them in a room without any food or water or light for a day would have helped making them weaker. At the end, where would have been the fun in killing without hurting them before?

They opened the door slowly, the cigarette still in their mouth.

“Hi little heroes, are you ready to make my evening fun?” Said the villain with a smirk on their face, before turning the lights on. Unfortunately when they did, their cigarette fell from their lips. Something unexpected was in front of them. All the heroes were already dead, blood was everywhere, the silence was deafening.

“Is this some kind of joke?”

The villain laughed, when they heard an heavy breath, coming from behind the sofa.

“I always knew you weren’t that innocent, darling, but why stealing my hostages? They were mine.”

The hero was there, hiding their face with their hands, covered in blood. They were trying to accept what had just happened.

“W-well, you think that just because you caught them they’re yours? I’m better than you at hurting people, and those heroes deserved to die anyways.” Said confidently the hero, looking at their nemesis. Guilt was hidden in their voice.

Villain was shocked.

“Are you sure you’re okay? I would have never imagined to hear you say such things! Are you finally accepting that being a hero is not funny enough and that you should be a villain?”

The hero rolled their eyes. “No dumbass, i killed them because they tried to steal from my agency. They’re powerful, but stealing important informations is not very heroic.”

Then, the hero stood up and went near the bodies, trying to clean the blood on the floor.

“You know what? I like this side of you.” Admitted the villain, looking at their nemesis. They were very hot, especially with the blood all over their face.

“Shut up, you know i could kill you too if i wanted.”

“Well, then do it. It would be such a hot scene to live.” Said the villain, licking their lips. They were very close to the hero, their eyes stuck on the other’s lips.

“Ugh, you’re so- i’ll kill you, not in a hot romantic way though!” Answered the hero, blushing a bit even if they tried to hide it. “You know i could do it, i killed this people. I also have plenty of weapons here and-”

“Oh my sweet little hero…you’re becoming such a baddie.” Whispered the villain, close to their mouth. “I have a bad influence on you.” After saying that, they kissed the hero gently. Just a soft little kiss. “You’ll be mine one day, don’t worry about that.”

“Y-yours? I just said i want to kill you.” Said the hero confused, blushing even more.

“Your mind said that, your body thinks something else.”

The hero felt completely exposed, Especially when they bear the touch of the villain on their skin. Not even the blood could stop the villain from being obsessed with them.

• please, send me requests! I need a few ideas for new snippets. thanks for reading 💗 i wanted to make this snippet sad/comfort… LOL. i also wanted to make it longer and a bit better-😭

[ordonianhero]

Wild’s actions in the Sunset arc

DISCLAIMER: I would like to say I am not a licensed doctor or psychologist. I am taking this information based on things I have read and a bit of some personal experiences. Also like to note we are talking about fictional character, though we may feel a deep connection and see them as real through our own eyes, based on how we connect to them. So please dont take this too seriously.

So everyone remembers how Wild reacted when the shadow took Twilight down. He failed to listen to the Captain’s orders, and acting purely on emotion. Reckless. Most of wild’s reaction stems from his experiences with loosing people he cared for. PTSD if you want to call it that. However is you want to get much deeper into it beyond just “Oh well he watched all his friend’s die”, there’s a very deep underline reason as well and this is where in time with healing his impulsiveness will no longer be so and he will better think things through. An unconscious mind is never logical. It where all our feeling are driven by. It how we love,desire,fear,jealousy, sadness anger, and more. It drives our emotions and desires. His unconscious mind was working without the knowledge or control of a conscious mind. Our bains actually prepare for action 1/3 of a second before we consciously decide to act. Hence Wild acting with an unconscious mind. But who can blame him. I sure all of them wanted to react the way he did, he just happened to be the one who did what he did. Even if it ment putting his own life in danger. He just wasn’t thinking clearly and saw “red” as we can call it. So I even if he was to be thinking he was using his conscious decision, his unconscious mind actually made the decision for him.

Our conscious mind doesn’t control our emotions.

Now with that said, when it comes through experiencing things as traumatic as all the Links have experienced though their journeys before this very moment, it understandable why for some can be like Captain who knows they need to wipe out the rest of the enemies and avoid anyone else being injured, before taking on the challenge of taking on the shadow. Where as wild witness this evil thing hurt someone he deeply cares about and narrow focused on that instead of worrying about anything else. He was going to take revenge. Acting on emotion based on past experiences. There was nothing logical about it and its hard to understand this kind of behavior. Some might even want to say it could be about maturity as well, but I think no matter the age, we all been in a situation (and dont brush this off like “oh I would never do that, I would be like the Captain and know strategically they need to take on the rest before taking on shadow.”) where we responded through an unconscious mindset. Causing more harm then good in a situation. This how we get into emotional battle with friends instead of well communicating calmly in an emotion moment. I have done it and I have lost a few good friends cause of it. We make excuses like “Oh well-“ it doesn’t excuse the behavior. The lads havent had proper time to heal all their wounds and so their actions often reflect that of a unconscious mind. Why the Captain seem like he has a conscious mindset, cause he is trained in battle situations to know going in recklessly wont accomplish anything. Not saying he’s not emotional. Oh he is plenty emotional and probably hides it because in that moment emotions can not take part in that situation. At this point I think I have explained Wild behavior in the sunset arc.

So how can wild train to think more consciously then unconsciously? By liminal thinking, he can influence the unconscious mind. Giving back their ability to make rational and logical decisions. No longer influenced by illogically, emotionally,or irrational behavior. Reconditioning their unconscious mind. But again these are all fictional characters we are talking about, but in irl we as people can even train our minds to a more conscious way of thinking in emotional situations. WE are limited by what we pay attention to. Only noticing the things specific to ones immediate reality. The society someone grew up in, influencers in their lives and life experiences. Based on experiences and how one sees things, one makes assumptions. Through assumptions one draws their own conclusions and that how ones beliefs are formed. Beliefs being from everything what someone “knows’ to be true.

So wild in his reaction is was in the belief Twilight was dead, from the only info he was given. That he couldn’t be healed. There for dead. And that my friend is why Wild acting how he did, even when confronting Four. His unconscious mind was driving him.

Once he got away and mulled over it in a more conscious mind set, did he make something in hopes it could help. His emotions still there, but he was no longer being influenced by them. Thinking more logically. Not saying being emotional is wrong. I think everyone is allowed to feel their emotions, it more about what you do with them. You can be sad, mad, etc….and still be able to respond to thing in a less irrational way. Anywho. I think i said enough on this. I am curious what you all think? Feel free to share your thoughts. It’s encourage actually. Also there is no wrong answer here, everyone will have a different way of seeing things and that is completely valid. I just wanted to shared kind of a cool thing I learned that had me processing the whole sunset arc and wild’s behavior.

And as to what sparked this? I myself am going through therapy and going through the process of leaning to think with a more conscious mind then unconscious one when in tough situations. Just learning this stuff I find it pretty interesting and challenging at the same time. So that what got me thinking about Wild and is actions.

[another-danganronpa-fan]

Adding on to my DRDT Heathers AU????

Admittedly I've had this AU in my drafts for a really long time and finally decided to post it one day to clean out my drafts. But seeing someone make art for it has made me plunge into obsession once again.

OKKK SO!!! Since @ccrisntok made art of the Heathers AU recently (I seriously can't thank them enough, they're super talented so please check their page out!!) and added some things which I thought made so much sense, I've decided to expand on the Heathers AU a little bit as well with things I realized after I clicked post!! Consider this like a part 2 LOL -Everything that @/ccrisntok said in their post is canon to this AU now LOL (and they made some really good points too), including but not limited to Eden liking Arei, Xander outing Eden by accident, Arturo's red bowtie being the red scrunchie, Ace and Levi lying about Xander beating them up, and Levi being more of a "bodyguard" -Xander is someone who wants to hold on to the past as said in his bonus episode, so this fits well with Veronica, who wishes things would go back to they way they were when everyone was young. -During Fight for Me, I can kinda imagine Teruko and Ace absolutely going for each other's throats while Levi's kinda just there to make sure Ace doesn't die. This one's more of a joke and is optional to the AU LOL

-Teruko genuinely cared for Xander. So if in this AU the events in the killing game like Xander betraying Teruko never happened, and all the stuff with Chariton never happened, I think Teruko would still like Xander more than everyone else.

-Teruko was already distrusting of others even before the killing game. In Prologue EP 4, we see her asking Xander something like "What reason do we have to trust one another?" Considering that Westerburg High isn't exactly welcoming or kind, seeing all the bullying around her might drive her to act more like her Chapter 2 self. Instead of thinking "Even my best friend in the killing game betrayed me. I can't get close to anyone because of my luck and people will always end up betraying me", her thought process might end up like "Look at all this bullying and betrayal in this stupid school. No one here has been trustworthy or been kind towards me except Xander." -Adding on to that, Xander says to Teruko that he chooses to trust everyone there. Just like how Veronica sees the good in everyone. -Teruko's luck. Her luck would probably be a factor in this AU. Like @/ccrisntok said, it would explain why her life was so messed up and she was constantly moving school to school before meeting Xander. At the end, by blowing herself up, she could say to Xander something like: "After I make sure I die, I hope all this chaos in the school will finally stop." Or something like that. She might believe her luck influenced all the deaths and chaos, when in reality, her mindset, which she had BECAUSE of her luck and the people around her, was the true reason.

-I think the reason Teruko's a loner like JD would be 1: The same reason as JD, who didn't want to get attached to anyone, and 2: because she's canonically in a lot of debt and had to constantly move. -Even though Teruko can't die for some reason, I think being directly blown up by a bomb would probably end her. She might also say something like: "I committed all these murders, and I'm facing the consequences.", since while she says that murders should have consequences in Chapter 2, she's also pulled a knife on Charles and held said knife to J's throat. In this AU, Arturo, Ace, and Levi would've hurt the only person that's shown her kindness. She'd probably go for their heads. -Arei's development (credit to artist tagged above)!! Since she has it pretty rough in this AU, she'd think of Arturo and David as her first friends, even if they're not close like her and Eden here. She might still consider them friends who've protected her from being bullied just because they're popular. So like the development she got in the killing game, she would start to soften up after making friends, while she'd still be a bully because her friends aren't kind either. That changes after meeting Eden, which makes Arei realize that to be truly happy with her friends, she needs to act kind and be with good people. Since her sisters were still around, she didn't feel like she was in control yet, so she wasn't like how she was in canon DRDT.

-Xander's prone to getting into fights. Not physical fights, but his hot-blooded and emotional nature makes him get into a lot of arguments. He also stands up for people, which makes sense for that pool scene where Veronica says she doesn't want to be with the Heathers anymore. ("What's your damage, Arturo?" ykyk) -What drives Teruko to completely blow up the school would be Xander's fake death. She was already gonna do it, but seeing Xander "dead" would destroy her. He was the only one she could trust, after all. I think JD knew Veronica was faking her suicide, but in this AU either Xander was so convincing she didn't realize he faked his death or Teruko didn't notice in a moment of panic. She'd say something like "You were all I could trust..." or "Of course my luck made this happen."

-Since Xander has kind of a "saving the day" attitude, it'd match Veronica deciding to kill both herself and JD during Dead Girl Walking (Reprise) to save the rest of the school.

[waitmyturtles]

(Please forgive me if any of this has already been written — I haven’t gone through all the reviews on the tag yet!) I have ZERO BUSINESS commenting on Midnight Museum, considering I only began watching from episode 5 ONLY for the guest stars, but since friends are puzzling over the plot, and it’s as confusing to me as I’m seeing in the reviews, I just want to say:

1) There is clearly a mishmash of religious/spiritual commentary happening here. I know far too little about the influence of Hinduism on the history of the Thai cultural spectrum, but give me an ashram and castes (and spiritual figures keeping people out of religious spaces for their castes), and I’ll say that’s a commentary on gatekeeping in sub-continentally-influenced regions.

2) Couple that with a burning at the stake. Could this have been a reference to the American Salem Witch Trials? I feel like that’s a REALLY specific American reference in a Thai show. The Spanish Inquisition also had burnings at stakes. So maybe that’s a reference as well?

3) In trying to parse Khatha and Chan/Dome’s situation, what’s really coming to my mind by way of comparison is Achilles and Patroclus. Achilles and Patroclus of the Iliad were… what, exactly? Certainly companions. Maybe friends? Likely lovers — likely lovers, as was common during the time of Homer, when subordinate male soldiers served as… what, exactly — companions, friends, lovers, to more powerful soldiers.

It’s foggy. It’s assumed, but our assumptions in modern times do not account for the unspoken cultures that were assumed for Homer’s time. History can be foggy…. as is being portrayed in Midnight Museum.

But besides the lovers bit (ship ship ship), here’s what I think are the important parts:

a) Patroclus was adopted by Achilles’s father. They were raised in the same family — but it’s not clear if they were raised as brothers, per se, or more like supportive friends/companions. Some theorize that Patroclus was kind of like a servant-friend to Achilles (even though Patroclus was older than Achilles — so that may indicate a kind of caste-or-class-like difference there, too).

b) It’s often written that Achilles allowed Patroclus to die. Patroclus asked Achilles to enter the Trojan War. Achilles consented. After Patroclus defied an order from Achilles, Patroclus was killed.

It was Patroclus who defied an order — but at least, when I read and learned about the Iliad in college, it was taught that his death was attributed to Achilles.

c) As we all know, Achilles also had a “weak leg,” but Patroclus, of course, didn’t heal Achilles’s tendon. I think the healing parable there is just Patroclus’s companionship to Achilles, who was known as a totally fearsome warrior.

In the show, we are told that Khatha was the one who killed Chan. But we don’t see Khatha lighting the fire. We just see Chan cursing Khatha.

I’m not sure we can trust history here. And I don’t know how to put this all together. (And I have almost no idea of why Ton/Nanon came back, which was why I watched this episode in the first place, dammit.)

But the last thing I’ll say is:

4) There is a goddess in Hinduism named Devi. Devi is often referred to as “The Mother.” Many have called her “The One.” What Devi represents is the “oneness” of the world — that while there are countless practices, countless deities, countless ways of being, that Devi represents that we are all ultimately As One. Wikipedia has Devi down as representative of “ultimate truth and supreme power.”

I’ll say again that I have really no idea what’s happening with the plot. But I wonder if awllllll of these spiritual references are beginning to coalesce under that figure known as The One (and hell, I might tell a whole bunch of Indian aunties that a Thai show might be serving GUN ATTHAPHAN as an avatar of Devi—those home shrines could look a whole lot different).

The One is making Khatha face… something. Truth? Foggy history? The theme of the show is The Witch’s Game, and Anthikka has referenced a Creator in previous episodes, so maybe truth seeking is all a game to her and her god. What I’m honestly wondering about this show is whether or not it is a huge, confusing, macro commentary on the crazy-ass diversity of religion/spirituality/mythology, and how it can lead to the perception of various realities, as it were, when in fact — we are all just One Humanity, One Truth, and we are possibly fucking each other over by way of our selfish preferences (as Khatha wanted Chan all to himself) (but then Khatha let Chan go) (so Chan dies) (and Khatha is to blame).

I…. I just feel like there might be a simpler way to explain all of this in a drama, but who am I to be critical? At least the acting is great, even if Gun has to play like, five or six roles!

[pico-digital-studios]

Into, Across and Beyond! Cast: E-21

Replaces: LYLA Origin: Sonic the Hedgehog (2020 film) and Sonic the Hedgehog (2006)

"I have faith that you can actually do good WITHOUT having to resort to these measures. Don't you remember who you once were? You saved lives out of the goodness in your heart, just like those around you have. Why stop it now? Why when you believe letting others die is what's best for the SEGAVerse?"

E-21 is a special version of one of Movie Eggman's drones from Dimension MOV-2019, but with some special AI built into it.

Hopefully you've caught up with the Lost Memory Sonic explanation, but if you haven't, please do so before reading further. After whatever happened to erase the alternate universe LM!Sonic tried to take residence in, the hedgehog began becoming cold, his sheds of goodwill beginning to die out.

While exploring the multiverse on his own volition, LM!Sonic arrived at Dimension MOV-2019 after Movie Eggman was banished to the Mushroom Planet, but before he came back. The hedgehog took the opportunity to sneak into the doctor's abandoned truck and take one of the drones he left behind, feeling it could come in use.

Using a bit of technical know-how he got from his Tails back when he was still good, he reprogrammed the drone to help him with day-to-day tasks and simply be a companion towards him. The drone's newfound AI in question? It housed the consciousness of none other than the Princess Elise from that destroyed dimension.

The two had genuinely bonded well when LM!Sonic decided to replace the Sonic who died in that dimension, and when he was with her, he seemed to have genuinely found peace with himself, and when around her, he genuinely seemed to be happy. Elise felt the same way herself, at least happy to have a Sonic around as a companion as she adjusted to her new predicament.

Eventually, the two discovered the Quill Society, and Elise as E-21 was more than happy to introduce herself, even getting one of the top positions in the Society. However, it was after that that she and LM!Sonic began to grow distant. He still relied on E-21 for his work, yes, but while she did trust his judgement and fears of getting things wrong, even she found his cold acceptance of people dying concerning.

Elise really wanted LM!Sonic to make the right call for himself and wanted to free his repressed memories to help with that. However, he made it clear that he willingly repressed those memories because of the trauma they bring him, especially the deaths of his Silver and Amy, and that he was through with playing nice as a hero.

She still remained optimistic in her new work in the Quill Society, and even enjoys teasing some of the other members on occasion, such as around Zonic's serious, yet still caring, personality. She was even kind enough to help show OMT!Tails more about the SEGAVerse upon request, and can even show her original body in holographic form.

Later, when instructed to apprehend OMT!Tails during the big chase, E-21 bluntly refused, considering that LM!Sonic was literally the ONLY Quill Society member to have extreme prejudice against the kitsune and the fact she would not willingly harm a child. After LM!Sonic was knocked out of Terminal Velocity later, she decided then and there that he was clearly a bad influence to her now and got him briefly imprisoned.

In the aftermath of OMT!Tails's mission, E-21 was heartbroken to send LM!Sonic away, but by that point, the rogue blue blur's emotions had numbed, all consumed by his one-track-minded hatred for OMT!Tails and his new desire to control people's fates. It took her about a week to get over it, with fellow Quill Society members providing her comfort during that time.

After the events of Many More Heroes, she was able to continue providing good service for the Quill Society, happy to be provided upon for database-searching and general tasks. Sure makes a change from fans hating on her non-stop, huh?

[whysodelirious08]

Fantasy storybook stuff

Eddie Munson x Any reader [Gender Neutral]

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Summary: You're dropping off your brother Dustin to Eddie's trailer for a D&D session with no intention of staying but your interest in Eddie and his band influences you to stay a little while.

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Genre: Fluff and Fun. Minor friendly!

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Warnings: No spoilers! Don’t worry, you’re safe here. Some profanities.

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Word count: 1.8k

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I do not give anyone permission to translate or repost my work, please be respectful to me and my work. — if you enjoyed please comment or reblog! Ask if you have any questions.

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You weren't particularly into one kind of music or the other, you just drifted into whatever you felt was right at the time.  Though you often pondered just how plain your life would be without your Sony Walkman. If you weren't dropping off your brother Dustin to his D&D games or working, you were preparing to attend your first year of college later this year, and if not either of those then you were picking up extra shifts working the clean up shift at Scoops Ahoy where you had been happy to find that Steve Harrington was getting along well with Dustin. 

As much as you rarely admitted to it, you had found a keen interest in a very local band; Corroded Coffin. You had managed to hide and sneak around just to get a chance at seeing them play. Seeing Eddie play. Okay. Yeah perhaps you had a interest in Eddie, nothing serious obviously but even you couldn't deny that under that denim jacket and well tamed mop of hair, he was a good looking dude. You knew better to form any attachments, though. You had to leave for college that year and couldn't commit yourself to anything, and you didn't want people knowing you perhaps, maybe had the hots for the guy. 

What you didn't know was that when you arrived to drop your brother off this particular evening, you would knock the door and be met with none other than Eddie himself. 

"Dustin! Please! You know I don't understand any of your fantasy storybook stuff" you groaned as you let your hands run down your face in a dramatic manner, letting your arms flop to your sides after. The door opened just as you had said that. 

""Fantasy storybook stuff"? Surely you're not referring to one of the greatest games ever made?" A familiar yet new voice appeared, a smirk appearing on Eddie's face while he looked through his eyebrows a little at you. You groaned and rolled your eyes playfully. 

"Not you too." You said sarcastically though it was taking you every ounce of power in your body to not die from excitement and fear. He was there. Actually there. In front of you. Jesus what were you? Thirteen? Your comment towards Eddie earned a chuckle which only made your heart race a little faster. You smiled but looked away to your car. 

"What? In a rush to leave? Why don't you come and see for yourself?" Eddie joked, leaning against the door while Dustin looked at you, smiling, waiting. 

"Yeah because I want to spend my free time listening to Dustin and his buddies act out soke fantasy nonsense? Yeah-no I'll pass" You said after you scoffed and turned on your heel. 

"Hey come on! It's not boring I promise and I'm sure Eddie can help you make a super awesome character! Please-!" Dustin said as he clung to your arm, facing you to look at him, your back to Eddie but you could sense his smile at Dustin's attempts to convince you. 

"Thirty minutes. That's all I'll give you to convince me. Take it or leave it." You stated as you pulled your arm away gently though you wanted to be up close to Eddie, you wanted nothing more than to be his friend but making friends wasn't your strong point. Dustin cheered a little and dragged you along, not giving you a chance to change your mind, trying to ignore Eddie though you brushed past him to get through the door. You were lead to where the rest of the group were and got some well deserved strange looks since everyone knew you weren't into this stuff, your taste was a little different than the genres involved in the game. 

You took a seat at the table, made to sit next to Erica, though you didn't mind since she seemed nice, apart from her odd comments about people's appearances, you had since made a mental note to not piss her off or else be faced with criticism about how you looked, and that was the last thing you needed. You had yet to find a style that worked, often just grabbing something that worked. You had more important things to worry about. 

"Alright, alright. Gather yourselves, kids. This ones gonna get rough!" He said as he clapped while he sat down in his throne of sorts. You didn't take your eyes off him, not for the entirety of the session. You were hooked on his descriptive tellings, even if you had no fucking clue what it all meant. You had caught his glance a few times and you had promptly smiled and looked turned into what the group was saying every time, just to avoid the awkwardness. Your lip rolled between your teeth as you drifted off into your thoughts, wandering a little before you heard the screams of the chairs while the group stood up. 

"Ugh! Next time, Munson! I'm gunna-" Erica started but didn't finish as the group diverted the conflict and attention, you heard Eddie's quiet laughter as he closed the divider. 

"Let's not argue the facts. Anyway-" He stated and then his eyes dropped to you. 

"Thirty minutes, huh? What happened to that? Perhaps our little game isn't so bad?" He smiled and walked over, hand resting on the table as he leaned to the side a bit. 

Your cheeks reddened but not enough to notice. 

"Yeah yeah whatever. Actually I have a bit of a favour-" You asked as you stood up, glancing over at the group who were talking amongst themselves. 

"A favour you say? How can I be of service, my keen wanderer?" He asked. Cheesy. You forced yourself not to roll your eyes, you noticed how he leaned in a little. 

"Well I know you're in a band. And I was wondering if you would…teach me how to play guitar? I mean, I have a few months left until college and-" you rambled a little, for fingers interlocked together. You glanced away a bit, human interaction. It was never your forte. 

"Oh? You want me to teach you? Hmm. And what would I get in return?" He asked and he moved to stand fully, pulling his sleeves up to reveal his tattoo. He crossed his arms over his chest and waited for your answer. 

"Well…I can help…uh- help you with your…school work?" You offered, knowing that that may be a bad choice. You knew Eddie had been held back and yet here you were willing to help him out just because you wanted to get close to him. You couldn't just say 'Hey, you seem cool. Can we get to know each other?'. You just had to find awkward ways of getting close to people. 

"That sounds like a pretty neat deal to me, Henderson the First" he joked, seeing as you were the older sibling. You sighed a little but found it funny just enough to laugh under your breath. 

"Well how about now? I'm free and I wouldn't give up the chance to tease you at how bad you're gonna be at guitar" he admitted as he walked over and grabbed his bag. You knew he lived at the trailer park and you often avoided such a place. 

"Uh…sure. I guess. I gotta drop Dustin off though" You mention before you see that he's already headed off with his friends and sigh a bit. 

"Apparently not." You stated with a dry chuckle before Eddie moved back to grab an acoustic guitar. 

"Right. You take this and site over there, I'll show you some basics on my Baby." Eddie explained and you did as you were told. You spent the next hour side by side with Eddie, his slow guidance and gentle corrections helped you get the gist of things, a rush felt every time he physically corrected your finger placement. You felt a lot better with his words of encouragement, knowing how your music teacher in school just got annoyed and eventually gave up trying to teach the class anything. 

"Not bad for a newbie" Eddie teased a little before you nudged him. Before letting the guitar slide into your lap a little. 

"So…Corroded Coffin?" You asked, absolutely dying on the inside from excitement. You loved to listen to them rock out, hearing them in person was 100 times better than listening to any song on record or cassette. 

"Shit! You know about that?!" He laughed, clearly surprised, moving to put his guiltless back. 

"Yeah…you're insane on that guitar! I've not been brave enough to show my face though. I mean it is usually the drinks who are listening but yeah…" Your voice soft yet your excitement showed enough. 

"What?! No, man you come see us. It would be great to actually have someone who's interested in listening. Not that this town cares for me, let alone my music" He laughed a little and sat back down. 

"You sing by any chance?" He joked, clearly not expecting any kind of answer but you couldn't help by wonder if saying yes meant you'd get an 'audition' just for the hell of it. 

"What if I say yes?" You joked back with a smirk, standing up to meet his eyes. You saw him raise his brow a little, waving his hands up a little. 

"Then I'd say you better prove it. My band needs a vocalist" he challenged. You suddenly felt a rush of nerves, what had you gotten yourself into now? 

"I'll sing if you sing. Deal? I'm not doing karaoke by myself" you state as you crossed your arms, Eddie moving to match you. 

"Alright. But no laughing at my voice." He stated, moving to look through his records. 

"Iron maiden? Black Sabbath? Dio? Accept? WASP?" He listed out some names and yet you let him pick for you out of a few that you mentioned you knew. And that was it, there the two of you were; acting like total idiots as you sung, you were laughing more than singing by the end, mainly at Eddie's attempts at singing into the bottle of cola he had previously picked up to drink. The music blared from the trailer, the space was a little small but that didn't stop the two of you. By the end of it he had you in his arms, laughing into each other, using each other for support before you crashed into the couch. 

"You sounded like shit-!" You exclaimed finally as you finally breathed slower. Watching as Eddie let his head fall back, their curls falling with it to give give a clear view of his face. 

"Well so did you!" He countered with a smile, shaking his head a bit. You pushed him gently and sunk back into the seat. 

"No, you were good actually. Perhaps I'll introduce you to the rest of the guys huh?" He said finally after you both rested enough. You found yourself smiling like a dumbass back at him. 

"Yeah?" You asked excitedly, childlike excitement beaming. It would a dream. You were so into music but that wasn't an career option for you. 

"Sure. Wanna grab something to eat..?" He asked now. This was the best afternoon ever and it was only getting better…

[@alittlebitofinsanitea request]

[eurydicees]

More haikyuu!! pacific rim AU info please!!! (esp the Oikawa details you wanted to share!)

YESSSS thank you for asking !!!!!!!!!!! ok so here’s the deal, but under the cut bc this got. Long. 

oikawa joined the jaeger program because iwaizumi did and he wasn’t about to let iwaizumi do it alone. that’s the primary reason, even if he won’t admit it. he will tell people his reasoning is stuff like i want to do my part to protect tokyo etc etc. ur typical hero stuff, yk? which is all partially true! but also a lot of the influence in the decision really was “i can’t let iwaizumi die alone.” he loves his best friend very much and wasn’t about to let him go into this dangerous world without someone at his side. Anyways.

so the fic starts with them drifting for the first time! it is in this first drift attempt—which is ultimately successful—that oikawa realizes iwaizumi’s in love with him. 

which, really, is something he should have realized a LONG time ago. but he had very much been choosing to not think too hard about all the little signs iwaizumi had given, and so this kind of comes out of nowhere for him (and, honestly, for absolutely no one else). 

so the first bit of the fic is him kinda coming to terms with that and trying to navigate their relationship while DEEPLY in denial that he loves iwaizumi back. there’s some internalized homophobia stuff here but more than that, there’s the fear that he’ll have iwaizumi and then iwaizumi will get killed. and oikawa can’t deal with that—with maybe having him and then losing him. 

he can be brave about a lot of things: he can fight kaiju if iwaizumi is his other half, he can have verbal sparring matches with kuroo and come out unscathed, he can make fun of iwaizumi’s bedhead in the morning without being afraid of the resulting playful punch, he can face down death in this war against the kaiju. 

but he can’t be brave about this. the idea of losing iwaizumi is unthinkable, the idea of loving so deeply someone who is lost even more so. 

so he tells himself that they’re both happy with what they have. he tells himself that he’s satisfied with this friendship-bordering-on-more-but-they’ll-never-say-it-out-loud. he tells himself that iwaizumi’s satisfied with it too. and they just bear it, that tension between them, until it all snaps. 

oikawa’s arc though the story (which is getting much longer than intended lol) is about learning to accept being loved and learning to love! he’s getting there! it just takes…some tragedy, first. i love him so much. 

so the second bit of the fic is about him realizing that he does love iwaizumi and that’s the only thing he’s really sure of in life. it’s him realizing, oh. what’s the point in denying this when we could be happy for whatever amount of time we get? 

then the last bit of the fic is , like, actual movie plot LOL. other plot stuff is happening while oikawa is having his crisis i promise, but like. you asked abt my most specialest character and so i simply must provide and forget about everything else that matters. 

also u didn’t ask for this but i want to share so here’s a silly excerpt from the scene after the first time they drift: 

Iwaizumi grins at him, unhindered by any worry, so unlike his strained smile before they had started. He had been more nervous than Oikawa, but that nervousness seems to have fallen away and all the tension has released from his shoulders. He looks calmer. “We did it.”  “I don’t know what the big fuss was,” Oikawa laughs, nudging Iwaizumi’s shoulder with his own. “We had that completely under control.”  Iwaizumi laughs a little. They’re walking towards the Mission Control room to do a debrief of their first attempt. Beforehand, they had been told to do so in order to talk about what they need to do better. But this felt good.  Then Oikawa’s smile falters. “Iwa, what I saw, what I felt from you, about, um, about me—”  Iwaizumi swallows, shaking his head, and Oikawa cuts himself off. “I don’t want to talk about it.”  “Okay,” Oikawa says quietly. He thinks he could push the subject further, but he doesn’t want to ruin this any more. If Iwaizumi doesn’t—doesn’t want to talk about his feelings, then they won’t. Simple as that.  Not talking about them, though, doesn’t make them go away. It isn’t going to change the fact that Iwaizumi is in love with him, and Oikawa doesn’t love him back. 

if this so compels you, there’s more stuff in my pacrim au tag !!!