#if nobody gonna do it GOTTA DO IT YERSELF!!!!

[msookyspooky]

Goin' Hunting

You've been running from Bo all around Ambrose for the last hour...And he finally catches you in the woods.

Bo Sinclair x AFAB!Reader • CNC • Dubcon • S/M • Master/Submissive • Primal Play • Outdoor Sex • Rough Penetration VP • Fingering • Humiliation • Domination • Degredation • Praise Kink • Later; Established Relationship and Brat Dynamic from Reader

No Word Count. Not proofread.

Your heart pounded as you sprinted to the woods. God damn it, you were so close! So fucking close to escaping.

Gasping for air, legs aching, knees weak and stumbling as you kept running...You heard a long...Low... Whistle...Somewhere behind you in the woods.

You froze, plastering yourself up against a tree. Sweat was dripping down your face and into your eyes as you blinked it away. It was pitch black outside except for a Quarter Moon. Bryer bushes scrapped exposed skin except for your jeans and flannel. It was October in Ambrose...Still warm for Louisiana but there was a damp heaviness in the air that made a chill ghost over your skin.

"C'mon out, darlin'....Ya ain't gettin' away. Ya know this...YER JUS' MAKIN' IT HARDER ON YERSELF!" He yelled out with both amusement and frustration lacing his thick Southern Accent. He was a predator. Through and through. He looked at you not like a human but like some scared little rabbit running from him.

You knew what he'd do if he caught you.

You covered your mouth, eyes wide to try and not say anything. Trying not to whimper as your eyes darted to the side.

He was in blue coveralls and that hat that read sweetbird 69. His tall broad shouldered frame crept past your tree and you felt your heart drop out. Trembling with anxiety as he looked around and looked the other way before huffing to himself and walking away from back where he came.

You felt your shoulders untense as you finally took a tiny, quiet breath you were holding. Slowly releasing your mouth and waiting a few moments. You snuck a peek seeing he wasn't there. He must have went back to the road or to Ambrose to hunt for you.

You took the risk to make a run for it. Lester! If you could get to the road, if he saw you, he could get you out of here and you could win this.

You shoved off the tree taking off before releasing a scream when you got tackled to the ground.

"GOTCHYA!"

You struggled and he slammed you down with a grin. "Shh, shhhh." He told you as you fought him. Trying to crawl away from under him with fistfuls of leaves and soil in your fingers as he just grabbed you by your thighs and dragged you back to him.

"I don't think so, honey." He growled out and with a slight grunt flipped you onto your back where you had even less leverage.

"Get the fuck off me!" You yelled, teeth gritted as you tried shoving him off. "Motherfucker, get off!!"

He just chuckled at your attempts to shove his big self. He was well over 6'1, probably close to or was 180 lbs of muscle mostly and had an aggression in him that just spurred him on.

He grabbed your jaw and squished your cheeks. "Shhh...Shh, it's okay. It's over now. Ya aint gotta fight no more."

You kept struggling, grunts and cries escaping you as you screamed.

"Go ahead! Scream all ya want, sweetheart. Yer gonna be doin' plenty of it tonight...Ain't nobody around to hear ya." He mused with a sadistic smirk.

You tried to use your hand to shove him off by his face and he just grabbed both your wrist and jerked them down. Pinning them to your sides. Your heart hammered, your body trembled, a tingling went through your whole body at realizing just how strong he was. No matter your strength, he was stronger and had the upperhand...He could do whatever he wanted and you were helpless.

He smiled down at you. A bit of sweat curling his hair near his forehead as he caught his breath a bit from chasing you. "Yer a fun one, ain't ya?" He shoved you down more as you flinched with wide eyes. "Gave me quite a workout chasin' yer fine ass all over town. But I won. And now? I think I deserve a prize for winnin'."

He came foreward and tried to kiss you and you tried to bite him. He just laughed heartily in amusement at you. "Biting are we? I didn't take you for a feral dog...More like a sweet lil toy I get to use...Is that what you are? My toy I get to use?"

"Fuck you!"

"Don't you worry bout that. Imma do plenty of it out here." He retorted with a dark chuckle.

"You'll never get away with this! You don't have to do this, I won't tell, please!" You tried to reason as you felt him switch your wrist so he had you by one hand, pinned over your head. The other large hand of his roamed with that black and silver ring reflecting off the moon every so often. You could see his veins in his hand as he jerked at your belt and you whimpered and shook your head.

"Hey." He sternly told you before his voice became sweet and mocking once more. "You're gonna be a good lil thing for me, ain't ya? It'll only hurt for a lil bit. Jus' a few minutes of pain, nothin' too bad. I'll be done before ya know it."

He unsnapped your belt with one hand and worked on the button of your jeans as you fought and struggled in a panic. "N-No! No, don't-"

He cut you off by shhing you again. His blue eyes gleaming down at you with his pupils dilated. A sick smirk on his face. He was enjoying seeing you almost in tears, seeing you scared, feeling you fight him. He was a sadist, that was for sure.

You screamed and used your last bit of strength to knee him in the lower side as hard as you could. He grunted as you got away. But just enough to get a foot away before he grabbed you while you both were still on the ground.

He shoved you into a sitting position against the base of a tree. "Now, why ya fightin' for? Yer jus' makin it worse on yerself!...That knee kinda hurt, sweetheart. " He grinned that lopsided grin of his with his brows furrowed a bit. "The more ya fight, the worse its gonna get. I was gonna go easy on ya but now? I think you need tore up a lil bit. Need those sexy thighs to have some bruises even a few welts on that nice ass too-" He smacked the side of your ass through your jeans with a smirk. "I think you can handle it."

You stared at him with wide eyes as he held you by the throat up against the tree. On his knees while you sat. Everytime you raised an arm he squeezed tight enough to make your vision blurred. Once your arms fell to your sides he loosened it just enough to let you get tiny breaths of air. "Good...tha's a good toy for me."

You had tears in your eyes, gasping for air, sweat dripping off you as you could do nothing now. He was in control and he knew it. You felt small, helpless, vulnerable.

You whimpered with a cut off cry as you felt his calloused fingers dip into your jeans and feel your pussy. Running along the outers lips and just barely dipping in.

He pulled his hand out with a giant grin and a laugh at how wet you were. Coating his fingers in long slick trails of wetness from...The excitement? Adrenaline? Your body just reacting to this situation? Either way, you jerked your head away with shame.

"Ain't that jus' beautiful... It's like you know jus' how to turn yerself on...." He ripped your jeans off and then ripped at that flannel to expose you more. "I think yer startin' to like this, baby...Do you like this? Do you like knowing I can take whatever I want from your body and you can't do nothin' to stop it? Ya like the rush of fightin' an' runnin' from me?"

You furiously shook your head and gasped when you felt his thumb make rough circles over your clit. Jolting and trying to squirm away with no where to go. He used his hand to jerk your head to look at him while he kept rubbing your now hardening clit. "Ah, ah. Yer gonna look at me and tell me how much this is turning you on."

You shook your head with his fingers still digging into your jaw. You grit your teeth trying to ignore the heat pooling in your lower abdomen. "No...No, I don't."

He smirked. "Really? That why yer pussys so wet?" He jeered. "Now...Say it."

You refused stubbornly and he pinched your clit lightly hood and all. Your back arched and jolted in pain and pleasure at the same time. But the pain was a bit more as he did it again harder this time as you forced out with shut clenched eyes. "I enjoy it!"

He chuckled and gently rubbed soothing circles over your aching clit. "There ya go...Oh sweetheart. That is so sensitive! I can't wait to make ya scream for me." He grabbed your chin roughly again and forced you to look at him while he rubbed you there.

You tried so hard not to give him the satisfaction of seeing your body betray you. But your brows rose up and your mouth parted as he smeared some wetness over your clit and used two calloused fingers to rub underneath and all around your aching bundle of nerves.

He smirked that lopsided toothy grin at you. "I don't know about you, Sweetheart, but my bodies tellin' me to take somethin' from this lil situation...What's yer body tellin' you?"

You whisper to him, face hot and tears in your lashes. "P-Please, don't."

A dark brow rose as his fingers dipped down lower. "Yer beggin'? Funny, I don't remember askin'. Ya need to realize somethin' here, darlin'...I'M in charge. Not you. And I don't remember askin' for permission or askin' if you wanted this...This is allll for me."

"P-Please-"

"Hush." He jeered, seeming to get short with you as his thick masculine digit barely went in before he took it out and did two. Your mouthed opened in a shaky gasp as he kept talking. "Now we're gonna do this my way. You just need t' shut up and let me enjoy this moment without all that bitchin'."

His fingers stretched you but there wasn't too much resistance with how wet you were. Just a short moment of discomfort with the sudden stretch before he started curling his fingers and twisting them up into that cushioned frontal wall. The man was the devil.

You couldn't even contain the whimpering moan as he kept a firm grip on your chin so he could see your face at all times.

"Oh God, don't." You softly moan out as he just picked up the pace on your already adrenaline high turned on body.

"I don't think ya get it, darlin'...This is happening one way or another. Here in Ambrose, yer gonna learn what I say goes and if I want to make yer body get an ounce of pleasure before I have my fun then that's jus' how it'll be...Just relax." He cooed the last part with an evil smirk.

This wasn't for your benefit. He just loved forcing it out of you. Loved seeing the shame on your face as your own body betrays you.

You released a sobbing sort of moan. He leaned forward. "Just...Give in Sweetheart." He chuckled and got closer to whisper in your ear. "I'm sure you'll enjoy yerself. Jus' let it feel good."

His fingers kept doing that upward tickling motion on your g spot as your thighs started to quiver. A gasp escaped you as he kept coaxing you with his fingers and his words to cum.

He grinned when you moaned louder, feeling your inner muscles clench his fingers a bit as that heated started pooling in you. "Oh, no more fight in ya, huh? Where did that fiesty lil fighter go?" He pulled his fingers out as you whined in protest. So close you could almost taste it. "Oh so you liked that. Well you ain't enjoying nothin' without me." He started undoing the fly on his coveralls.

You tried to have some resistance. Some form of pride left as you felt tears running down your cheeks and you numbly shook your head. In a pleading tone. "No."

He sternly told you in a half sneer half smirk. "I don't remember askin' you a damn thing about what you wanted." He pulled himself out. Hard as can be and even leaking a bit as he pumped his cock a few times "Whaddya think this dance is for? Yer in Ambrose now. This is what we do to sexy lil things like you that get in over their head."

He grabbed your arms and pushed in. Your head reeled back and...God damn...He felt...Good. He shouldn't! But his was such a perfect size and shape to you in your nervous, excited, fearful and turned on body. You could feel a second hearbeat in your clit and your inner walls ached. They ached so bad from his teasing that the stretch felt like much needed itch that had to be stratched. It hurt a little at how forceful he pushed in but it hurt so good at the same time as your head snapped back and your hips bucked at the sudden intrusion with a strangled cry from your lips.

He chuckled, not moving for only a few seconds. Grinning in pure sadistic pleasure. "Oh you like that, don't ya?" He pulled out thrust forward with a harsh grunt while gripping your hair; forcing you to look at him. "If I remember correctly, this whole thing!-" He thrust harshly again as you saw stars and felt a deep aching soreness in your lower abdomen that hurt but fuck it was a good hurt. The type of pain that was easily overlooked for the building pleasure you were feeling. "-Started from you trying to fight me so hard!" He grunted again through clenched teeth as he thrust hard into you, this time it hit deep and you cried in pain a little. "Well how you like it now, huh? Ya like it rough?"

You tried to bite your lip and shake your head and then the bastard switched it up. Pulling out halfway and doing short but fast trusts right on your g spot and you groaned low in your throat. He laughed at that.

"Oh yes you do, darlin'. All that fighting in the beginning? You just wanted me to get this out of your system." He kept thrusting grunting a bit as he leaned in and nibbled at your ear. "You like it when I'm in charge. Yer just too shy to admit it."

You gasp and tremble as that thrusting is so damn firm and hard and fast and the fucker angled his hips upward. He knew what he was doing as you felt your inner muscles involuntarily clench around him.

"There we go, beautiful. Now ya ain't thinkin' bout it s' hard." He raised your chin to look at him. "Ya don't wanna ruin this moment. Cause this might be the best moment of whatever time you got left...So just enjoy the ride." He let go of your chin and shoved your thighs upward while thrusting deeper and fadter. "Oooh fuck, baby...Shit." He grunted out with a tiny moan himself as he went hard in you.

Your eyes rolled back and a tiny grunt of 'no', 'please', 'I can't' escaped you every thrust as your inner muscles betrayed you. Starting to do a milking motion around his cock on their own as he moaned a bit.

"Oh, that's it. S' good for me...It's alright, sweetheart. Nobody has to know ya like this. This can be yer dirty lil secret."

"I d-don't." You forced out not even believing it yourself as your face screwed up in pleasure the deeper he went.

"Hah, there's that face again." He grunted out with a slight smirk. Sweating and face flushed as he drove into you. "Ya can't hide it, darlin'. I can see it in yer eyes. I know you like this. Your sweet pussy keeps suckin' me in...Sopping wet....Urgh!" He groaned when you involuntarily clenched and it made his face screw up into a sneer as he pounded you on the forest floor against the base of that tree. He jerked your head back by your hair. "You love this. It's why I can make ya do anything. You're mine in Ambrose. You do what I say and you love it or learn t' love it."

"Noo-" You moaned out feeling yourself getting closer as tears kept pricking your eyes.

"Yes!" He laughed out through a moan while his blue eyes stared into yours. "You're doin' such a good job of makin' this fun for me. What a good toy you are, fightin' me and actin' like you don't like it. Yer goddamn pathetic, darlin'. A filthy, naughty lil liar whose pussy is betrayin' em."

You trembled, high pitched cries escaping you. "Yess-" You shook yourself realizing with shame you just said that. "No." You gasped.

He grinned while he kept thrusting a spot you seemed to like. "Yeah, ya like it. I think this whole chase was jus' you puttin' up some walls so you didn't look so desperate...You're so pathetic darlin'. Don't try to fake it. You love this. Maybe I'll keep ya around a lil longer and walk ya around Ambrose on a leash? Show anyone and everyone what a good pet I can make you be...You'll get addicted to this, sweetie...Good lil whore-"

You couldn't contain it any longer as those wonderful tingles and seering heat just washed over you. You hung your head back and yelled out in orgasmic bliss as he kept fucking you. He was right, you did scream. You couldn't even hold it back and you didn't want to. This was too damn animalistic and primal and wrong not to cry out.

He stuttered his hips a bit at how hard your pussy was clenching him as your hips bucked. "Fuckin' shit, honey." He gasped out. As soon as you calmed down and your muscles where just contracting every so often he huffed with a smirk. "Ooh you are such a lil freak, darlin! I haven't had one like you in too damn long. Maybe I was wrong...You're not pathetic, yer disgusting. Yer body doesn't lie as much as yer mouth does." He leered with a sadistic grin as he panted while thrusting.

You laid there satisfied. The adrenaline gone...The game over as you gave him a lazy smirk while he kept thrusting.

He looked a bit perplexed while moving slower in you. "What's that face for? Ya finally ready to admit yer nothin' but a naughty toy for me?"

You grinned and leaned forward to kiss his nose. He completely stopped thrusting. Looking with wide eyes and a faint tinge to his face before giving you a wry smirk. "Hey, jus' cause the games over for you don't mean it is for me....Stop bein' sweet, damn it."

You chuckled, blissed out on cloud nine. God Damn that was the type of orgasm that...You need a nap, a drink, a cigarette. Fuck. All you could do was with tear streaked cheeks and watery eyes and a heated face just give him that dumb satisfied grin.

He thrust a few more times before you decided to help a bit. Tired of the game and wanting your lover to hurry up so you could go shower and cuddle in bed all night. You used those inner muscles to clench and unclench while swiveling your hips the best way you could. He gasped out. "Hey! Heey, I'm in charge!... Urgh, fuckin' damn it YN!" He screwed his face shut and groaned low in his throat as he thrusted a few more times before panting and staying in one spot. "...Shit....Uh fuck." He panted out before looking back up at you. Giving you an annoyed look.

"...We'll have to think of a better punishment for you. Yer too damn freaky and I'm gonna have to be creative. Yer such a bad lil thing." He finally cracked a smile himself.

You were out of subspace. The chase and fighting and roleplay was over as you huffed with a coy smile. "I am not."

He pulled out of you and just held you for a moment. "Oh, yes you are. It's okay to be naughty jus' don't be so stubborn bout it." He looked at you before kissing your forehead with a sigh. "But it does make it more fun. You're such a perfect toy...Still gotta make you work for it though."

I scoffed. "Why?"

He smirked down at you. "Cause you'll be the most spoiled brat if I let you get whatever you want whenever you want. You're insatiable. I'll never get anything done around here!"

"Oh no, spoiling me? How awful." You chuckled and he smiled fondly down at you in return.

He stared down at you, using his thumb to caress your cheek. This was...It was interesting. You WERE a victim...You and him bonded during your time in that room. What started out as a supposed Master/Slave dynamic quickly became something more the more he got to know you. He fought it hard but after a while he couldn't deny his caring for you. You were that missing piece. It helped your inner freak matched his. You brought out his sadism to the point he rarely got other victims. You were too fun. And he brought out that side of you that wanted to be dominated and taken care of. This chade thing was your idea after you taunted him he was gonna get too tired to chase victims eventually anyways. All it took was a 'wanna bet?' and that predatory sadistic look in his eyes and you took off in both fear and glee making him work for it the last hour. You playing like you hated it and fighting him was all part of the game.

"What?" You asked as he gazed down at you.

"...Thinking how much I hate you. How damn soft you've made me." He had his hand around your throat. "Should've killed ya months ago. Ain't never let a toy get this comfortable."

You knew he was bluffing as you gazed up at him with soft eyes. You quickly found a look that made him weak and you pulled it out when you really needed it. His eye twitched in irritation as he kissed you. "Damn you..."

You kissed him chaste and sweet before telling him pleasantly. "You love me."

I tiny smile tried tugging his lips. "I tolerate you." He lost the smile, sighed, then just let it come back again. "...I do care for ya quite a bit though, honey. I ain't felt like this in too damn long."

"Sounds like love but you're too stubborn. C'mon, say it. 'I love you'."

"Glad to hear you admit it, brat." He huffed in bemusement while giving mock anger. "You ain't in charge here."

"Come oonnn, it's just us in the woods! Ain't like you haven't said it before. " You teased softly.

He groaned, rolling his eyes and acting more annoyed then you knew he was. "Fine. I love ya, ya fuckin' pain in the ass....Should've left the glue on yer mouth when I had you tied to that chair." He sighed with a slight smirk. "Come on. Let's go home." He helped you up. His body language of steadying you and his eyes roaming over you to make sure he didn't hurt you as much as normal victims; betrayed him. You were so tempted to retort 'something something...Body's not lying as much as your mouth does-" But you relented. Getting your pants back on.

You flinched when moving.

He looked pleased with himself. "Sore?" All before looking at you tenderly. That look reserved only on rare occasions for you. "C'mon, baby. Let's get you home...This was fun."

You let him lead you, wrapping an arm around your waist to steady you.

You finally said once you got out of the woods. "I almost made it to the road. You know the rules...If Lester or some car picks me up to lead me back to Ambrose? I'm in charge. You will be MY toy for a change."

He let out a hearty laugh. "That ain't happened yet and it ain't gonna."

You gave him a determined smirk. "Wanna bet?"

"Are you challenging me? Yer gonna lose, darlin'. Remember your place...But fine. Jus' cause I know I'll win. How bout we do this again tomorrow night if you can walk properly."

You chuckled. A bit sore but too satisfied to care. "You're on, Bo...What collar do you wanna wear when I win?"

He smacked your ass while walking with an amused chuckle. Clearly not thinking you could win. "Oh shut up. I'm just gonna make that punishment even worse next time, smart ass." But he pulled you close and bent down to kiss your forehead as you both walked the empty Ambrose streets back to the house.

[simsstuph]

Billay grabbed her shoulders: Ya gotta let the Mullens stuff go. They ain't comin' back for it.. Hell, if they wanted it they woulda done been back by now for it.

Delilah sighed: You're right. I guess it's just weird how someone could just leave all of their belongings behind like that.

Billay: The Mullens were real nice, but their daughter wasn't. She high-tailed it outta town quicker than a four legged jack rabbit. She'd send her kids back every summer to spend it with grandma and grandpa, but I don't think she ever came herself... Not once..

Delilah: That didn't upset them? Why would she just leave her mom and dad like that?

Billay: Heck if I know, I was just a youngin' when she left, but some of them grandkids of theirs was 'bout our ages. Used to play down at the creek with them growin' up. Once Mrs. Mullens got hauled away they stopped comin'. Aint nobody heard from them since.

Delilah: Who hauled her away? I mean.. IF the daughter never came back.. Who took her away?

Billay thought for a moment: That was the only time she ever came on back here. To get Mrs. Mullens after Mr. Mullens passed away.

Delilah: Did you see her? Did they take anything with them?

Billay: Sure did, I was out for my daily ride with Tulip. She got Mrs. Mullens in the truck, and loaded a suitcase or two into the bed of it. That was it. Gone with the wind after that.

Delilah: I just wish I could know more, living here and seeing everything left the way she left it when we moved in. I feel like I know her. Or at least, want to.

Billay smiled: Yer' gonna drive yerself crazy tryin' to figure this out darlin'. The Mullens aint ever comin' back. That's all yer gonna get from it. Some stories don't got no ending, just what ifs.

Delilah: Every story has to have some kind of ending... What're you doing here so early anyway?

Billay: Me and Van are headin' to the horse races today with the girls, wanna tag along? It's real fun! Everyone in town will be there, it's a big ole' celebration.

Delilah hesitantly: Sounds fun, but I'm gonna pass. I've gotta get my room together before school starts next week.

They small talked for another minute or two.

[kurogane-redfox]

@lorefated asked: “ I’m sorry. I can’t explain my own feelings but you did what you could to explain your situation. This doesn’t make us friends. But I’m not saying we can’t work toward that..” levy huffs with her hands rubbing against each other. / lol Lucy’s probably in the back making sure she’s apologizing [Random Shit]

He was fairly certain she was coerced into what she was saying. As if her huffing and speaking through GRITTED teeth hadn't given that away already. She was free to hate him, after all, he hated himself for what he'd been forced to do. Had her and her team not been out that night he'd NEVER have had to hurt her, but since he'd been being watched by Sol he'd not really had much of a CHOICE.

"Ya hate me. It's clear as fuckin' day. Ya know what? I hate myself a hell of a lot more than ya could ever fuckin' hate me,"

Considering he still, and quite often, found himself contemplating disappearing, maybe even dying. Nobody would miss him. He had a feeling nobody would even notice. The guild would move on as if he'd never been a member in the first place. While he was FAR from suicidal he found those thoughts creeping up on him time, and time again. He didn't have anyone he could really talk to about it so he just suffered in silence.

"I'd rather hear yer apology when ya actually MEAN it and not when yer forced to talk to me under the guise of pretendin' to apologize. It's meaningless when ya don't fuckin' mean it."

He didn't hate her. He wasn't even mad at her. He was just TIRED. So horribly fucking tired. He wanted to collapse and wake up after about a week. Maybe longer. Perhaps he could return and people would actually be SURPRISED to see him alive. Especially if he wasn't on a job while he was "missing".

"Look, I'm just gonna get outta here so ya don't gotta force yerself to stomach bein' 'round me. I'd say 'see ya' but since yer good at stayin' away when I'm here, I have my doubts."

If she bothered to look at his face it would show his fatigue but that was beside the point, now the Dragon was attempting to move past her without touching her at all.

The last thing he needed was to be accused of ATTACKING her.

Sometimes he wondered if someone who didn't feel remorse for what he'd been forced to do, would have as many NIGHTMARES as he did.

[kimquatz]

I've never thought about pearl n lapis till ur art and i've been blessed thank u so much 💙💙💙

YES, GOOD!!! they’re such a crackpairing at this point, but their potential/narrative as a relationship fascinate me so much??! my goal with my pearlapis fanart at this point is to shed the LIGHT of what COULD BE!!!! 😤😤

[bertrumstrousers]

bet you thought I forgot but no I’m still here ™️

Bad Blood - Chapter III

“Good morning, sir.”

The half-asleep young man at the counter answered Bertrum with a quiet, “Hi, sir—how can I he—“

“I’m headed to Brooklyn. Would you be so kind as to set me up in a Pullman roommette, departing as soon as possible?”

Lacie piped up, “…me too. I gotta be sure he don’t kill nobody.”

Both the clerk and Bertrum glanced at her with puzzled looks—Bertrum wondering why she wanted to accompany him and the clerk wondering what prompted Lacie’s comment. The young man spoke up once more as he nodded a ‘yes’. “Gladly, folks.”

As the clerk stamped the rough green tickets with the departure time, Bertrum simultaneously leafed through his wallet for payment and told Lacie, “…you don’t need to come, dove. I won’t force you, but I won’t force you to stay here, either.”

“Bertrum, someone’s gotta be around to make sure ya ain’t do nothin’ stupid.” She gave him a firm pat on the back. “And like ya said—you’ll be there for me come Hell or high water. It’s only right that I do the same.”

The train station was nearly empty when the pair arrived for their departure. Bertrum recalled days where passengers packed onto the platform like sardines, waiting their turn to be canned and shipped off. Tonight, however, they only shared the space with a young gentleman impatiently checking his watch and a small family consisting of two parents and their quiet children.

“How long we gonna be up north?” Lacie grumbled groggily as she rested a weary head against Bertrum’s side. Watching her partner’s hurried packing and fussing about with luggage, followed by the surprisingly uneventful cab ride, sapped a great deal of the energy she had. The instant she saw the bed in the sleeper car, she decided, she was going to climb in.

“Not longer than a day.” Bertrum replied as he patted his partner’s shoulder. “Perhaps a full night’s sleep on the train this evening, a day spent at the studio, then a trip back home overnight. I don’t intend to allow Mr. Drew to keep me waiting.” Lacie felt his breathing quicken and his chest tense up under his coat at the mere mention of his old boss’s name.

“Real focused on ol’ Joey, are ya, big guy?” Lacie sighed before sitting up. “The man lives in your head rent-free, I swear.”

Bertrum fought back a rude comment in favor of a distraction that took the form of the approaching train.

“Ya got us a nice room, Bertrum.” Lacie had tossed her bag on the floor of the car beside the folding bed before fussing over the latch that held it in position. “Coulda sworn we’d be sleepin’ on some hard old cot but this’s a proper bed.”

“The porter ought to be glad—if the room wasn’t what I paid for, the whole train would know I’m upset.” Bertrum laughed heartily as he slid the partition door closed.

Lacie chuckled as they folded the bed out. “Ya interested in a nap or are ya gonna go keep yerself entertained some other way?” She had barely waited for the bedposts to settle on the floor before crawling onto the bed. “I was only half-done nappin’.”

“I’ll lie down for a bit myself.” He rested beside her. “I have an odd feeling this trip is the last time in a few days that I’ll be able to get a proper bit of sleep.”

Lacie knew if she pressed him, he’d answer with yet another mention of his disdain for Joey. Instead, she simply rested her head on his shoulder and “hmm”ed softly in agreement.

Lacie was shaken awake an hour and a half later by an impatient Bertrum who barely waited for her to fully awaken before he cheerily urged, “Dove, come along, it’s suppertime.” He tugged lightly on her shirt to make his point before using his reflection in the window to straighten his tie and fasten his waistcoat.

“Give me a minute.” She rolled to her back and stared up at the ceiling. At some point, Bertrum had drawn the curtain over the train’s window, but the low spring sun still snuck through its corners. Slivers of light flickered against the opposite wall as the train blew past treelines and faraway buildings. Lacie’s eyelids grew heavy again.

“Dove.”

Lacie knew better than to ignore that voice. “All right, all right. I get it.” She sighed and rolled out of bed. With a quick brushing of her hair with her fingers and tying of her bandanna on to keep her hair contained, she turned to her partner. “You ready?”

Bertrum offered her an enthusiastic nod, light smile and gentle nudge towards the now-open partition.

The dining car had long since quieted by the time supper had ended. Bertrum had shifted his attention to the passing scenery as he patiently waited for his partner.

“So.” Lacie mumbled through a full mouth. “What’s yer plan for tomorrow.”

Bertrum whipped his head to fix an irritated gaze she didn’t expect upon her. He hissed a little too loudly, “Lacie, don’t speak with your gob full!”

“‘Scuse me?” Lacie growled back at him, though she did swallow her food to prevent any further argument. “Ain’t like you to snap like that.” She gestured at him with her empty fork, knowing well he’d likely have something to say about that too. “There’s somethin’ on your mind.”

Bertrum looked back out the window. Individual trees were no longer visible, only a deep green blur now that the train had at one point picked up speed. The past few hours had been just as much a blur to Bertrum as the passing landscape, and in that murky soup of emotion and rash decision, a deep regret had started to brew. But he couldn’t tell Lacie. He couldn’t tell her his second thoughts in the middle of their overnight trip, hours from home.

He’d have to keep that regret to himself, but the nagging thought kept creeping in. ‘Not admitting to your contrition is what got you so deep in Mr. Drew’s web in the first place. Just tell her.’

Bertrum shifted in his chair uncomfortably as he turned to face his partner again. Her deep brown eyes were narrowed at him, but he was unable to tell whether it was out of concern or anger.

“It’s…” Bertrum stalled by taking a few calming sips of water from the glass he’d left upon the table. “I’m having some regrets.”

Her expression softened as she set her silverware on a mostly-empty plate. “About?”

Bertrum stammered, much unlike him. “…I’m not sure how I feel about confronting Mr. Drew.”

“If I hear you say ‘Mr. Drew’ one more damn time, Bertrum, I guarantees I’m gonna scream!“ Lacie barked, drawing the attention of a woman quietly reading a novel at the other side of the dining car. “Fuckin’ forget about him!“ She slammed her hand on the table. “He’s makin’ ya miserable and I hates to see it!“

After fighting off the choking shock, Bertrum roared back, “That’s why we’re going to begin with, Lacie! I have a score to settle so I may stop being miserable!” The words poured out without a second thought, and Lacie’s visage made it obvious he’d made a mistake. “I just… I don’t know if this is too little too late! What if I’m wasting my time?!”

“Shoulda thought of that sooner.” Lacie’s voice put up a wall, impervious to any of his follow-up grouses. As quietly as she could, the reader with whom they shared the car packed up her things and slipped out the door. Lacie couldn’t blame her as she lightly slammed both hands on the table to push herself from her seat. “Bertrum, if you wanna make a scene, be my guest. I won’t get anywhere with you like this.” She walked around the table, placed her plate on his and gave the man’s cheek, flushed with guilt and embarrassment, a tender kiss. “I ain’t mad at ya, but I’ll leave you be for now.”

With that, Lacie too headed out the door, leaving Bertrum in the empty train car with his racing thoughts.

[starlessea]

Ultimate Guide to Writing Accents and Dialogue

I recently saw an amazing post on how to keep your characters ‘in character,’  and I wanted to make my own about writing accents, dialects, and overall just creating dialogue that suits the people you are trying to portray.

I’m a language/linguistic student, so here are a few tips I think you should consider!

1) Standard Pronunciation: 

First you need to think about where your story is set, and what is the standard dialect of the majority of your characters compared to your main character. What I mean by this is, if your story is set in the South, and all of your characters therefore have that Southern drawl, then it becomes the STANDARD, and has nothing to contrast it unless you introduce something.

If your main character (your POV) has a different accent, then make it NOTICABLY different from the standard of your story. It’s good to have accent variety, otherwise all of your characters start to sound the same.

2) Constructing your Vocabulary: 

Next, you’ll want to consider the vocabulary of your character. Ask yourself questions about them: are they educated, what was their upbringing like, do they work in a field with specific vocabulary? You can strip it back even further than that - when you think of your character how would you describe them? Could you see a badass biker using long, sophisticated diction on a regular basis? Or an old woman swearing like a sailor?

Don’t get me wrong, these are very much stereotypes, and often the most interesting characters are created by subverting your expectations. But use these questions as a springboard for your characters. If you’re writing fanfiction, and know the characters well already from a movie / tv-show, then try to IMAGINE them saying your lines to see if they are something they would actually say. 

However, also note that the register of your characters is bound to change given the situation. Obviously, someone is more likely to use heightened vocabulary in a certain setting - e.g. within a classroom - and more casual language elsewhere - e.g. in a bar. See below for such a distinction:

Formal: Yes/No

Informal: Yeah/Nah

3) Orthography, Syntax and Morphology: 

Okay, so those words might look a little scary, but don’t worry. Orthography is just a fancy way of saying spelling (specifically, the standard spelling system of a time/place and how we might see a character deviate from it), syntax is word order, and morphology is how words are formed (such as grammar, inflections etc.). I’ll give some examples of what I mean.

Orthography: I’m going to use Daryl Dixon from TWD for reference (keywords: Southern drawl, redneck, country). For Daryl, some words he says I write phonetically (according to how he says them), so that the spelling matches the phonology. E.g.:

Standard: “Take care of yourself.”

Daryl: “Take care of yerself.” 

I tend to do this alot with pronouns, such as ‘you/ya,’ ‘your/yer.’ But I also use the long, standard forms for variety and emphasis - e.g. ‘you’re right.’

Syntax and Morphology:

Often, a character will use different syntax or morphological patterns that we aren’t used to. Often, non-native speakers are portrayed using types of English we often categorise as ‘incorrect’ - but are just non-standard. You can find good examples of this within Creole literature.

For example, past-tense verbs are usually conjugated in the present-tense form:

‘we was / if I was you’ instead of ‘we were / if I were you’ 

“I go now.” 

“She gives it to me yesterday.” 

Unfortunately, a lot of these conventions are also stereotypically used to portray characters who are uneducated - think of Joe or young Pip from Charles Dickens’ Great Expectations, for example.

But, you also want to avoid STEREOTYPING your character too much, as that can come across as amateur or cliche. What I mean by this is don’t over-rely on certain patterns - don’t overuse them. It’s okay to have variety, even if its with the SAME character. Just do it in a way that fits your overall construction. You can even change these speech patterns DURING your story to represent the development of your character, or them picking up an accent, or being around different people.

4) Apostrophe and Negatives:

Apostrophe: These can be used to mark a number of things - such as abbreviations, contractions, possession etc. If your character has a certain accent, they might roll certain words into one another - not stressing specific consonants, for example. We can see this in ‘C’mon.’

Alot of abbreviations are now recognised slang words, too. For instance:

C’mon = Come on 

‘Cos = Because

Lil’ = Little

‘Ma = Mama / mother

Ol’ = Old

Think about whether certain abbreviations and slang matches the register of your character, as well as their location. For example, slang words like ‘cuppa’ (cup of tea) are usually expected in a British setting.

Also, remember that the apostrophe goes in the position of the letter/letters you are getting RID OF, which is not always necessarily in the place of the contraction. E.g:

‘Do not’ contracts to ‘donot’ which abbreviates to the standard ‘don’t.’

Going back to my Daryl Dixon example, other common abbreviations I use for him include the following:

‘Ing’ contraction - walking becomes walkin’.

 Anyone, anything - becomes ‘nyone, ‘nything

Pronoun contractions - her becomes ‘er.

Connective contractions - and becomes an’ or n’.

Other contractions don’t even need apostrophes - such as ‘gonna,’ ‘gotta,’ ‘sorta,’ ‘wanna.’

Negatives: 

Even though Standard English doesn’t use double negatives anymore, we can use them in our writing of characters as an indicator of their background or dialect. They can also be used for emphasis.

Coming back to Daryl, he tends to use a lot of double negative constructions:

“I ain’t nobody’s bitch.”

“Don’t want nothin’.”

“Ain’t go no reason to.”

If you want to get even more complex, you can have a proclitic negative (where the negative attaches itself to the verb - e.g. don’t), and contract it further so you get a multiple contraction. For example:

You (pronoun), Are (verb, form of ‘be’), Not (negative) = you ain’t = y’aint.

“Y’aint never done shit for me!”

Because this is a three way contraction, it becomes a bit confusing where to put the apostrophe - is it y’aint or y’ain’t? To be honest, it becomes mostly your choice after that (stylistic). 

5) Loanwords and Imposition:

Loanword: This is a word borrowed INTO the native language FROM another one. For example, think of an American speaker using a French word or phrase in a sentence.

“Thought we were all takin’ a laissez faire approach now?”

Think of how this changes the sentence, and the impact it is going for. French is still seen as a prestigious language, so it can be used to heighten register, or can be used to mock/patronise/be sarcastic in a certain context (as in this example).

Imposition: This is when a speaker uses a word FROM their native language in the context of a non-native language they are speaking. It has connotations of power and agency. 

For example, a French speaker might use a French term in a conversation, despite it having a perfectly good English counterpart. This might be in order to demonstrate that a character is trying to show off, or is reminding their peers of their background or status.

6) Non-verbal Indicators:

This is more on the border of style, but I thought it was worth mentioning. Sometimes, the descriptive words you use can reflect a character's dialect. An obvious example can be how ‘drawled’ is associated with a Southern accent.

Although it might sound cliche, you should think about the vocabulary you want to use in order to describe a certain accent. If we were to compare perhaps Scottish or Welsh with French, for instance, you would be able to hear the distinct sound differences. The former are more harsh, guttural, have a lot of sounds that come from the back of the throat, whilst the latter is nasal and flows more.

Use your descriptions to emphasise this. Look up synonyms that describe the WAY in which your characters are pronouncing the words. Are they guttural, harsh, gravelly, thick? Or are they soft, fluid, smooth?

Anyway, I’ve rambled enough. Good luck writing, everyone!

Disclaimer: Even though this post is long, it’s actually really basic on a linguistic level - so I hope no true linguists read this haha. These are just some personal observations, but I hope they help!

[ask-the-official-gangreen-gang]

Review #1: Powerpuff Girls Z (early)

-The camera turns on, looking new, showing the gang all sitting together around Ace's chair, with Big Billy poorly hiding behind the chair. Snake's slit pupils are shrank, staring in fear as he's curled beside the chair in fetal position. Even Ace is holding his knees up on his seat. His eyes are wide enough to be seen behind his shades. Nearby, what looked to once be a laptop is in pieces on the floor, sparking.-

"...I knows we said we wouldn't do this til the weekend, but the boys and I came to a mutual conclusion: ....WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT GARBAGE?!?!!!!! It started good! Weird, but good! We gots a real hoot out of Mojo Jojo there, and I thought Buttercup was awesome! Missed the classic hotlibe phone, though. But the jokes were great! And we even laughed at the Amoeba boys and the cheesy nobody villains. ...Then we gots to episide 14. And-"

"T-t-t-the horror....That wassssnt me, that wassssnt me that wasssnt me!!! T-t-they ruined me...Made me a....a....!"

-Grubber pats Snake on the back, making a shhh motion against his mouth his finger. Snake curls back up tightly.-

"-Yeah...Ivy... THAT wasn't Snake!!!! That was a JOKE!!! And GRUBBER!! They made poor Grubber into....an idiot...!!! Grubber is the smartest one out of alls of us!!! I'll even admit he's got more brains than me! But nooooo!!!! They ruined him too!!!" Ace tries to punch the air, but Big Billy hugs the chair from behind, hugging Ace as well and lifting both off the floor as he cries.-

"WAAAAAA!!!!! BIG BILLY SCARY!!!! BIG BILLY NO LIKE BIG BILLY, BIG BILLY NOT MONSTER!!!! MOMMIES DONT HIT KIDS!!!! WAAAAA!!!!!!!!!"

-Ace is powerless in the hug so he just pats Billy's arm.

"I know big guy. Yer not a scary monstah like that. Yer not mean like that either. It's gone now big guy. And not to mention Artu-"

"¡¡¡ESOS HIJOS DE PUTA BASTARDOS!!! ¡¡¡¡ME CONVERTIERON EN UNA PUTA PERRA DE CUCARACHA FEMENINA!!!!! ¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡ Y DONDE ESTA MI HERENCIA MEXICANA?!?!! MI PUTO ACENTO MEXICANO!!!! ¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡! ¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡ HACERLOS COMER SUS PROPIAS LENGUAS Y-"

-Grubber picks up Arturo, quickly clamping a hand over his mouth. Every member of the gang is in blank shock.-

"Uh...trust me youse people, you don't wanna know what he just said. And my voice..!!! What happened to my beautiful italian accent?!!! My sweet voice!!!! I can accept the design, but the voice?!?! That's too far!! But even worse than that....was realizin' we grew up normal, got forcibly turned into monstahs, and STILL being shunned!! Not to mention Arturo!! Arturo had- Well, y'know... Not that...That...felt even worse than what we went through... We couldn't take it. Sorry people but- well ya can see for yerself there."

-Ace gestures to the laptop pieces on the floor.-

"Wes all smashed it at the same time. ...We're NOT monstahs!! We're humans, got it?!? We don't look it but we are!! And soon, we're gonna prove it to the world...We didn't ask for this. We's was just born unlucky...that's all...But enough about that...The Gangreen Gang is NOT a joke! We's always held our own against the Powerpuff goils bettah than that!!! Powerpuff Girls Z is BANNED in our dump from now on!! We're the Gangreen Gang!! And now we're gonna-"

"WAAAAA!!!!!!! NOT MONSTERS!!! NOT MONSTERS!!!!"

-This time Big Billy drops Ace and the chair, only to scoop the entire gang up into his arms, hugging them as he cries.-

"Come on big guy...ya gotta stop cryin' now. Or else...yer gonna...Arturo squeeze out and get the camera! We're done for the night."

-Arturo squeezes out of the hug sniffling, dashes towards the camera, then it goes black after he holds up a sign: Powerpuff Girls Z: X -

[walpurga-nacht-academy]

GALDTREA DORM - BIRTHDAY VENUE

SCENE I

PUPPET: [Upon this blessed day, we bring to you an offering that seeks to satisfy your whims. On behalf of us, servants, we present to you the one which the fates considered worthy: RIDDLE ROSEHEARTS.]

RIDDLE: Happy Birthday. Thank you for having me today.

JUNE: Ugh.

RIDDLE: Pardon. Is there a problem?

JUNE: ... Nah. Forget it. Sit down.

RIDDLE: ... Very well. Thank you again for inviting me over today.

JUNE: It wasn't me.

RIDDLE: I'm sorry?

JUNE: I said it wasn't me. Ya deaf or somethin', huh? I ain't gonna repeat myself!

Settin' up all 'his shit like it actually means anythin', ugh... I told them I don't wanna celebrate my birthday and still...

RIDDLE: I understand... In any case, I was really surprised when the puppet came to summon me like this. I never heard of such an invitation procedure before, to be honest. Though I suppose all sort of odd figures could be unearthed from among the world nowadays. There are rumours of an expedition team seeking out an old kingdom that was said to be submerged underwater, did you know?

JUNE: The hell do I care about 'hat shit? It ain't got nothin' to do with me.

RIDDLE: ... That's true, I suppose.

JUNE: ....

RIDDLE: ...

JUNE: ...

RIDDLE: ... The venue looks very nice.

JUNE: It's fine, I guess.

RIDDLE: ... I understand that Galdtrea is the dorm that specializes in caring for plants and magical herbs. We at Heartslaybyul also take care of our own rose garden and maze as decreed by the Queen of Hearts. It's really a lot of hard work. Plants are more fickle than I imagined, but it is very rewarding when they grow up and bloom.

JUNE: ...

RIDDLE: I have a lot of respect for people who dedicate themselves to such a craft.

JUNE: Tch. It ain't 'hat hard to look after stuff. Ya city folks are spoiled, 'hat's all. The venue today... The girls just all worked together for some reason to set it up. It's just some magical plants and all. Ain't 'hat fuckin' hard to realize, ya know?

Can't ya fuckin' tell for yerself, huh?

RIDDLE: That!

JUNE: HUH?!

RIDDLE: ... No, it's still a celebration so it wouldn't do to lose my temper here...

JUNE: WHATCHA SAY, HUH?!

RIDDLE: I was led to understand from this puppet that it was customary to bring a small gift to these events. However, it could not be something that could be bought. It was quite difficult to think of a gift that would be suitable for this occasion, but still, I think that perhaps I have managed to conform to the rules.

JUNE: ... 'hat's this?

RIDDLE: An apple pie that I made myself. Trey informed me that this is your favourite dessert so I thought it might be appropriate for the occasion.

JUNE: ...

RIDDLE: ... It's at least polite to thank somebody for going through all of this. The Queen's rules state that-

JUNE: It's dry.

RIDDLE: !!!

JUNE: It's dry. Tastes off. And ya didn't use the right kind of apples either.

RIDDLE: Dry? Tastes off? The apples?

... Those were the only kind available...

JUNE: Tch. Fuckin' city boys and their shitty apples. Ain't nobody taught you how to cook either, huh?! Ain't ya 17 or somethin'?!

RIDDLE: That's- !!! I will not stand for this sort of-

JUNE: Ya let the crust burn. Ya gotta watch 'hat carefully or it all goes up in flames, ya got it?! Come.

RIDDLE: Come? What are you talking about? Where should I come? Wait! Where are you-

JUNE: I'mma teach ya how to actually fuckin' bake somethin' right since 'hat four-eyes can't even do it by himself. Bet he just sits 'here with his dumb smug face and makes shitty jokes. Who'd be dumb enough to fall for oyster sauce in tarts, huh?!

RIDDLE: ...

JUNE: STOP STALLIN' AND GET A MOVE ON ALREADY! I AIN'T GOT ALL DAY!

... I'd rather be done payin' ya back already so we can move on with this shit.

SCENE II

RIDDLE: That was a very informative crash course, June-senpai. It always struck me as such, but you seem like a very capable person. Being able to cook and look after yourself like that...

JUNE: ... It ain't much. On the farm we all gotta do our part. Me too.

RIDDLE: I suppose that is true. In such an environment it really makes a difference how many people join in the efforts. As I understood, life on farms tends to involve a lot of gruelling work so I imagine the same must have been true for your own upbringing. I admire that sort of dedication to one's responsibilities.

JUNE: ... Ain't there some sort of game we gotta play, huh?

RIDDLE: Ah, that is true. The puppet did mention that we will have to do something like that. At our Unbirthday parties, we usually play croquet together. So I wonder if it might be something similar to that...

JUNE: Doubt it...

PUPPET: [Shall I proceed with the game instructions?]

RIDDLE: Hm? If you will.

PUPPET: [As requested I shall proceed with the game instructions. This part of the interview will require that I ask a question that June Himalia will answer and which Riddle Rosehearts will be tasked with interpreting.]

RIDDLE: ... I see. I've never been good at this sort of thing but I will try my best nonetheless...

PUPPET: [Question: Picture yourself on a stroll through town. The day is beautiful and you're half-lost in a daydream. You turn onto a street that you've never been down before, and as you walk you pass a beautiful house set somewhat back from the street. Pausing a moment to admire this lovely home, you notice the door is half-open. Why is the door ajar?]

RIDDLE: Why is the door ajar... Could it be that the owner simply forgot to lock it?

JUNE: 'hat kind of moron forgets to lock his own door? Huh? Ain't nobody forgettin' anythin' if they want to make it in life.

RIDDLE: Unexpected accidents like this can happen. It's important to learn how to be patient with people. Even if it's difficult.

JUNE: ... Tch. 'hat's easy for ya to say.

RIDDLE: I'm sorry?

PUPPET: [June Himalia please answer the question so that Riddle Rosehearts may interpret it.]

JUNE: Tch. Ain't it obvious 'hat the place is gettin' robbed, huh?! 'hat's there to even interpret, huh? This 'hole fuckin' thing is just stupid...

People are just dumb and naive and can't fuckin' think for themselves. That's why they rely on others like they can't fuckin' solve anythin' by themselves. Puttin' all 'hat crap on other people's shoulders, ugh...

RIDDLE: ... I think it's important to not get carried away in a crisis just because things seem to feel bleak. Sometimes people make mistakes out of oversight, rather than bad intentions so it's important to hear them out. At least that is what I have learned since the first years came to attend school...

JUNE: Ugh, 'hose two... They're always causin' trouble wherever they go.

RIDDLE: Indeed. But sometimes circumstances are beyond their control and it's important to acknowledge that, I think.

On that note... June-senpai, how did you know who I was talking about?

JUNE: Whatcha mean how do I know, huh? They tried to sneak in here last week and I almost punted them before they ran away. It's those two idiots that always come as a pair, ain't they?

RIDDLE: Yes... It is indeed them. I was not aware of this fact, however... Thank you for letting me know.

JUNE: Tch... Just make sure you teach them some manners. Tryin' to sneak into my dorm like 'hat. I went to throw 'hat freakin' statue after them and it broke. Now I gotta pay for the damages...

That's why stickin' with others is just...

As long as I got my plants and my garden I ain't need no fuckin' city apartment to leave the door open. Fuckin' idiots... No wonder they can't do anythin' right. People just gotta accept their limitations...

SCENE III

PUPPET: [Please proceed to the last part of the interview.]

RIDDLE: Very well. I will ask the last question then.

"If you were stuck on a deserted island with somebody, who would you want it to be?"

JUNE: No one.

RIDDLE: That... You should at least attempt to answer it...

JUNE: Tch. If I had to... Diana.

RIDDLE: Diana-senpai? Ah, now that you mention it...

JUNE: She's smart and capable. Can hunt and survive in the wilderness. And I've seen her taking naps with the animals on campus.

RIDDLE: Taking naps? How is that relevant?

JUNE: The weather up here is shit. It's always cold or some fuckin' sylphs are droppin' in like it's nobody's business and it's fuckin' annoyin'!

RIDDLE: I see... And Diana-senpai doesn't mind?

JUNE: Nah. She ain't mindin' anythin' at all, which is freaky as hell, but in the circumstances, it's the best thing ya can get. If I get stuck on a fuckin' island I want somebody who can adapt to that place, ya know? Who can hunt and not mind the weather. And won't be losin' her head over shit like some of the others would.

And she'll be quiet.

RIDDLE: It's true that I haven't seen her speak that much.

JUNE: Yeah. She's the quiet sort. It's good. There's too many yappin' shits around here and it's giving me a headache...

Besides... She's calm.

RIDDLE: Calm?

JUNE: Even when I start to rage, she doesn't seem to mind it at all... She doesn't look scared either. Just tells me to calm down like it's nothin'. Nobody has the guts to do 'hat to me.

Even back in her first year she didn't give a shit. She was smaller too back 'hen and I could have ripped her head off, but she just stood 'here and stared at me like it didn't matter who I was... It was nice.

RIDDLE: Nice? What do you mean?

JUNE: I ain't some fuckin' brute, ya know... It's just 'hat sometimes...

............................................................

RIDDLE: June-senpai?

JUNE: UGH! TALKIN' TO YA IS USELESS! FUCK OFF! WHERE'S 'HAT FUCKIN' PUPPET OFF TO, HUH?! I GOT A LOT OF WORK TO DO, YA SHITHEADS!

RIDDLE: ... I think it's best that we finish the interview also.

[*]

PUPPET: [Congratulations. The interview portion has been completed. Please proceed to the last event of the celebrations. A bottle has already been prepared for you.]

JUNE: ...

RIDDLE: ... Then, if you don't mind...

JUNE: Just get it over with... This whole day ain't been nothin' but a waste of time...

I hate this day, ugh...

RIDDLE: I understand. Then, I apologize but hopefully, it does not end up upsetting you too much.

Happy Birthday, June Himalia!

[champagne pops]

[collecting-stories]

Jacket - Daryl Dixon

Request: 93. “I’m not moving, your lap is comfortable.” and 80. “Take my jacket, it’s cold outside.” with Daryl Dixon? Please and thank you!

A/N: I need to do a re-watch of TWD soon. 

The Walking Dead Masterlist

-

With everyone else inside the small chapel you had gone out to the bus that Daryl was working on, convincing him to leave the engine for a little while and sit with you inside. Now that the prison had fallen there was no space for privacy. It was a miracle, and a blessing, that so many of you had survived and found each other again but you couldn’t help missing the ability to sneak off to the privacy of a tent or a cell with Daryl. Not that he was in the mood to do much sneaking around at the moment, things had been tense and any reprieve from the outside world was spent mostly in affectionate silence. So, it surprised you, as the two of you sat together, that he was the first to make conversation.  

“Thought ya had watch tonight with Abe.” Daryl mentioned. He’d overheard Michonne ask you and Abe to take first shift earlier in the day. It had surprised him when you came out to find him so close to nightfall.  

“I do. It’s still dusk though, I don’t have to be out until the sun goes down.” You replied, “I’m like a vampire.”  

“Yer like a child.” He admonished, jerking away when he felt you press your teeth against his bare collar “you just bite me?”  

“Maybe.” You replied, grinning.  

“Save it.”  

“When for?”  

“Behave yerself.” He popped his knee under your thigh, jerking you slightly in an attempt to force you off his lap. “Go outside ‘fore you cause any more trouble.”  

“I’m not causing trouble.” You swore, “I’m also not moving, your lap is comfortable.”

“Yer gonna be moving in a minute, I got things ta do.”  

“You’ve gotta do them tonight?” You knew Daryl wanted to go out looking for Beth and you understood that but you also didn’t necessarily want him to leave. Finding him again on the road had been unexpected and you were terrified that you wouldn’t be able to repeat luck like that.  

“Just looking for supplies. We can’t stay here forever but we’re gonna need water, extra food if we can swing it, it’s been a long time we been on the road. Ain’t like we can just keep going the way we are.” Daryl replied. Neither of you had talked about Beth or about your individual fears living on the road like this but he was just as scared of losing you.  

“I know. I wasn’t talking about that.”

“I won’t leave without saying something.” Daryl promised.  

“How about you’ll take me with you when you leave?” You had given it a lot of thought and you knew that you would willingly go with him anywhere, including on his search for Beth.  

“It’s something I gotta do on my own.”  

“Daryl-” you started to say.  

“Ya got watch, Abe’ll be looking for ya soon.” He cut you off, looking away from you. His grip loosened on your waist and you knew there was no use trying to continue the conversation. He was telling you that he didn’t want to talk to you but you couldn’t let that be it.  

“I don’t want you to try and do this on your own. What if something happens, we’ll never know. We’ll be here, waiting-”  

“Ain’t nobody waiting on me.” Daryl said. When you looked ready to argue him on that he pushed on, “and what happens if ya go with me and ya get hurt? Then I got two bodies on my hands.”

“I’m my own responsibility, we all are.” You replied. You weren’t some helpless kid in need of rescue. You’d been fighting to survive along with the rest of them this whole time. You’d made it out of the prison and back to them all on your own without the help or support of anyone. And you’d be damned if Daryl got it in his head that he was responsible for you.  

“No. I ain’t arguing.”

You sighed, leaning your head against his shoulder and closing your eyes. Both of you were silent for a moment before you finally spoke. It was getting darker out by the second and you knew Abe would be looking for you soon. “Don’t leave without telling me?” You requested. “Please? For my own piece of mind…if you won’t let me come with you-“

“Rick’ll need you here.” He said.  

“Yeah well I need you here and you’re talking about leaving.” You replied. Screw Rick. You knew it wasn’t safe to put everything on one person but you couldn’t help yourself. If Daryl got hurt out there or died there was no way you were going to be able to keep going on your own.  

“You’ll be fine. Ya don’t need me.”

You lifted your head to look at him, brushing some hair out of his eyes and smiling, “I do.”  

“I’ll tell ya when I leave, and I’ll be back.” He promised. He reached for the poncho that was sitting crumpled on the seat beside him, “Here, take my jacket, it’s cold outside.”  

“You sure? You just got it back.” You asked, standing up finally and slipping it on. A little big on you but warm and safe.  

“Extra stuff only weighs ya down.” He shrugged.  

“Don’t ever change Daryl.”  

“Go on, I’ll see ya tonight.” He promised, kissing your forehead before sending you off to find Abe. You knew, as you walked back into the church without him, that you wouldn’t be seeing him tonight when your shift ended. You knew that when you finally returned to the safety of the indoors as the sun was rising and Glenn took your spot, Daryl wouldn’t be in your normal place and you’d be alone.  

-

You weren’t the only one who noticed his absence in the early hours of the morning. As you stepped passed Carl you felt Rick’s hand brush the leg of your jeans. Looking down you saw him sitting there watching you, a worried expression on his face at the sight of you wearing Daryl’s poncho.

“Have you seen Daryl?”

You nodded, “He went to find Beth.”

“When? Did he say something to you?” Rick sat up a little straighter, hand already reaching for his machete though there was nothing he could do about it now.  

“No.” You shook your head. He hadn’t said outright that he was going, “I just know.”  

-

Taglist: @thinkingsofamadwoman @titty-teetee  @queenmissfit @marvelismylifffe @iluvmesomemarvelndc @absentmindeduniverse @medievalfangirl @smiithys @gigilame @sabertooth-potato @enrapturedbythemoon @oncemorewithfeelingg @cbarter @onemorebeautifulnightmare  @mainokutan @solllaris @twdeadfanfic @legit-emily @yespleasejayhalstead @kylieeepalmer

[world-of-socks]

Chapter 5: The Sun is a Mass of Incandescent Gas; a Gigantic Nuclear Furnace!!! Where Hydrogen Is Built Into… I’ll Stop Now. Ft. Explaining Friendship to a Dumb@ss

Note: heya! Hope you all are doing well. I don’t know what else to say. Other than I guess I didn’t realize how long getting this au to a point of completion is gonna take.

Yellow sat on her cot unable to move. She simply stared down at her boots, she only quavered slightly from her large frustrated breaths that were holding back more tears. She had never felt this out of place before. Never felt this lost before. Never felt this amount of not being in control before.

She didn’t want to rejoin the group, she didn’t want to feel like that again, but she knew she had to. She had to head back to the group, train with them, become one of them, so that she could win this war.

She tried to move, but nothing happened. She had suddenly noticed the amount of gems that were outside her tent. They were all heading for the training area she had left. That was more soldiers than she remembers there being.

Yellow breathed faster now.

She already had a bad reputation, was without the group she had come to be slightly familiar with, was surrounded by many unorthodox soldiers who didn’t function normally, and there she was, feeling like she was going to cry. How pathetic. What a clod she was.

She thought about what White or Blue would say to her right now, seeing as she no longer trusted herself for good advice.

“Get back on your feet, now, General. You are the sun for stars sake! They are supposed to revolve around you. Burn brightly, make them fear you. Don’t FAIL again!” White would yell in her voice that would waiver between dangerously calm to dangerously angry.

“Give me your hand.” Blue would say, and she would take her hand and squeeze it gently and just give her a kind look that spoke volumes through nothing but her eyes. She could speak the most well-written paragraphs through nothing but what was communicated through her face.

But neither were here right now. So she improvised.

After looking around sufficiently, to make sure no one could see, she gave her own gloved hand a squeeze, whispering to herself, “You are the sun for stars sake, burn brightly, clod.”

She stood up with a long breath and took a step forward towards the exit of the tent. Her confidence was little, but not nonexistent. It had never quite been nonexistent, it was always there in some form, even if it was fake.

One step.

Another step.

A few more.

She had made it the flap of fabric that led to the outside world; the camp. She took another deep breath and forced herself outside. There were less soldiers now, most had made it to wherever they needed to go; whether that was the training grounds or the forge or someplace unknown to her. She stood there for a moment unsure of where she should go. She was pondering just that when a voice called to her:

“Hey, you. You! Whatcha doin outside the general’s tent? I mean I ain’t gonna judge if you been snoopin’, but you know that ain’t really allowed right?!”

A gem, hunched over a fire that was near her tent, was the one who had spoken. They appeared to be overly tired and worn. Their gem had scuff marks on it, as if they should have been shattered many times.

Yellow tourmaline cocked her head for a moment and pondered who was speaking to her before she realized that she would have to give a response.

“Oh… I am a general. I’m just… new.” the words came out slowly, but somehow found their way to the surface.

“I see. Aren’t ye supposed to be wit the others then?” the gem raised an eyebrow.

“I-...yes.” Yellow frowned and what little confidence she had mustered seemed to drain out of her.

The gem pondered the statement for a moment, but instead of being angry or confused simply patted the log that they sat on and motioned for Yellow to join her. Yellow hesitated, but since she didn’t know what else to do she complied. She shuffled over to the fire awkwardly, but decided to sit on the log across from the gem; seeing as she still wasn’t used to sitting that close to other gems.

“So… what’s yer name, general?” the gem asked with a sigh.

“Tourmaline. Yellow Tourmaline.” she stiffened up.

“Mine’s Ammolite. Most folks just call me ‘A’ though. -Just easier.”

It was quiet for a moment before Yellow piped up, “Why aren’t you with the others? Don’t you have something to do?”

The gem laughed, but it sounded too sad to be real, “I’m retired, really. I been here for so long, Rose said I outta rest, she said I had too many close calls. She said I could go leave and rest, but I couldn’t make myself leave this place. I’m done fightin’, sure. But I ain’t done supportin my friends… of the one’s I got left.”

“I… see.” Yellow did not see.

It was quiet again. Yellow couldn’t wrap her head around the idea that one could simply stop living out a purpose. How could one stop? Her face contorted as she thought.

The gem laughed again, it sounded less sad though, “Confused, eh? Yeah, most are. And yer new so that don’t help. Would you like more of an explanation?”

Yellow frowned into the fire, thought for a moment, then looked into the gems face, and nodded.

Ammolite smiled, “I stopped fightin’ cause Rose believes that I deserve a rest. I was workin so hard, cracked my gem so many times, that she said I should be done. She didn’t want me to get hurt anymore. Sometimes I ain’t even sure why I stick around, though.” The gem sniffed, “All I get to do is sit here and watch what’s left of my friend’s get shattered on the field. I wanna stay, though, cause even though I ain’t fightin, I get to help you newbies. So even though part of my purpose is over and done wit, I gotta a new one now. Even if it's hard sometimes.”

“Why get close to anyone, then, if you just have to watch them get shattered?” Yellow blurted out before she could stop herself.

The gem was taken slightly aback at the question, but then settled into the fact that Yellow was new to this and answered her, “Because if you don’t care about nobody then what’s the point of anything? Besides, if you don’t care about nobody, who’s gonna care about you? It’s a sad life to live all on yer own, sure it’s sad when you lose a friend, but it’s worth it for the memories, ain’t it?”

“I… suppose so.” she replied.

“You got any friends, Tourmaline?” the gem asked.

“I-...” Yellow thought for a minute. She had something back on homeworld, but she wasn’t sure what it was. She thought about how she would feel if she lost any one of her fellow diamonds. “I don’t know if I have any. I think I used to.”

“What happened to them? If you don’t mind me askin?”

“They-... they’re back on homeworld. I don’t think they would want me if they knew I was here.” she stumbled over her words, still not quite understanding her own feelings.

“I see.” The gem thought for a moment, “I understand you’re new, and don’t understand this, and yer figuring yerself out, but I’m willing to be yer friend if ….you want.”

Yellow thought this over for a moment, “What… would that entail?”

“Nothin, really.” Ammolite laughed, “It’s just a mutual agreement that I care about you and you care about me.”

“Hm.” she responded and she thought for a moment before continuing, “But I-... don’t know you.”

“I know. But you could.”

“How?”

“I’ll just share some things about myself, and you can do that same.”

There was a pause, “That’s incredibly simple. If it is truly that simple, then why wouldn’t everyone just be friends for the mutual benefit of being allies?”

The gem smiled, a light that hadn’t been there before now dazzling her eyes, “Hm. What a beautiful world that would be.”

“Is that what you fight for? Why you’ve stayed?” Yellow felt the fire reflect on her gem; the morning sun rising.

“That’s definitely one reason.” The gem grinned, she could read the recognition in Yellow’s face: something had gotten through to her, even if it wasn’t much, it was something.

“Now let me ask you a question, Tourmaline.” the gem sat up a little, “Why aren’t you with the others? Don’t you have something to do?”

The sun seemed to go behind the clouds, and the morning air became crisper.

“I’m supposed- I’m supposed to be with the other generals, but…” Yellow trailed off.

“Everyone has bad first days, Tourmaline. I had mine when I was a general. First day I almost started a mass panic!” Ammolite reminisced, “You are just new. The squadron you been placed in is one of the most brave I ever seen! They been through a lot, it’s gonna take a while for them to get used to you and you to get used to them. It always takes time.”

Yellow was silent; shocked, in awe. A failure was a failure, and she had failed. She was a failure here, but this gem…

“I can tell that you are a strong one. Just hold out for a bit, take some risks. You ain’t on homeworld anymore.”

Yellow was still unable to speak. She had never quite been treated this way before.

“I tell you what. How ‘bout you go down to the forges and get yer weapon crafted? You’ll need it for when you fight anyway, so even if you can’t go back to the other generals you’ll still be doin work that needs doin.”

“Where… where are the forges?” Yellow was practically whispering.

“They’re right over there.” The gem pointed down the rows of tents to a more concrete tent of sorts with smoke billowing from it.

“Ammolite, I… appreciate your ...service.” she eventually concluded.

“You are welcome.” the gem smiled, “And remember we are friends, Tourmaline. You can talk to me, or sit with me if ya need. That’s why I’m here.”

Yellow nodded and then made her way to the forge, her confident strides returning to her.

……

Her head still reeling from the conversation she just had; she slowly pushed back the warm leathery fabric that covered the forge and walked inside. The gems inside were hard at work in the flames and lava, liquid metal being bent and shaped in their hands. She approached the countertop and stood there, unsure of what to do or say to get what she needed.

While she stood there, awkwardly, she turned her head towards what she believed was the sound of whispering. Sure enough, two gems were sitting on the floor of the forge, presumably waiting for a weapon, and were whispering to each other. As she rolled her thoughts over and over in her head, she suddenly realized a possibility and she stiffened:

Were they whispering about her?

Her face felt hot and she turned away to look back at the lava instead, which subsequently made her face even more hot. She shuffled around, now feeling more awkward than ever. Did they know about her incident from earlier today, already?! She felt tempted to leave but she just kept repeating Ammolite’s words to herself:

“I can tell that you are a strong one. Just hold out for a bit, take some risks. You ain’t on homeworld anymore.”

She chanced another glance at the two gems and they were still whispering, looking at her, but when the one caught her eyes, she too, blushed. Yellow decided just to look away and pretend it had never happened.

“Heya, dear, what can I do for you?” a fusion asked politely.

“I- uhm… I need a weapon made.”

“Have you gotten fitted for it yet?” the fusion, which appeared to be between a jasper and an aquamarine, asked politely.

“No, I don’t believe so.”

“Well then come back with me, hon, we’ll get you fitted.” The fusion led her to a back room that was used for testing weapons.

The rest of her time was spent testing her broadsword. The fusion kept saying that she should use one more proportional to her body type, but she insisted upon the oversized sword. Once the fusion gave up on convincing her, she went back to the forge to make her weapon and let Yellow wait with the other gems for her new sword.

She didn’t look across her at the two whispering gems. She was too… frightened, or maybe it was nervousness. She didn’t know, but she didn’t like the feeling so she made sure not to look at them. Instead she busied herself by fiddling with her gloves or her hair. And she definitely was NOT thinking about the two gems who whispered, not at all.

………….

When she finally received her weapon she quickly left the tent, greatful that the whispering gems had finally left. She kicked up small clouds of dust as she strode back to her tent. When she finally arrived, she was still the only one there. The sun still hung in the sky, her fellow generals wouldn’t be back until long after sunset. The days seemed to tick by so much slower on Earth.

She flashed a quick look at Ammolite before entering her tent. Yellow stood in the entryway, the fabric flap blowing gently in the wind behind her. She sat on her cot and polished her already perfect sword, and was yet again at a loss.

“A mutual agreement that I care about you and you care about me.” she thought back to what Ammolite had said.

If she was going to get into the other general’s good graces she was going to have to employ this new tactic.

She quickly busied herself. She tidied each general’s cot, folded the cloths that were strewn about, disposed of Jasper’s pile of broken cot pieces, and studied the lamps that hung about the tent. It took her longer than she would have liked, but when she finally deduced how the primitive lighting technology worked, she had finished. The room was tidy, it was not uniform, but it was tidy. Not only did she feel better about existing in the tiny space, but she hoped that the gesture would be appreciated.

She was sitting on her cot, polishing her sword, when the other’s finally came back.

“Why do I always end up with the most unruly squadrons?” Peach groaned.

“Ah shut up! You love em’!” Ame laughed and punched Peach’s shoulder, playfully.

“I-!” Peach attempted to protest but stopped in her tracks, “... What-...?”

Yellow bolted up from her cot.

“Woah. Yellow, did you do this?” Ame skidded to a halt.

“I did.” Yellow was unable to look at them, “I hope it is to your liking.”

Jazz lifted up the fabric door and entered, “Dang, Peach, bet you didn’t see this one coming!” she laughed.

Emerald pushed past the wide-eyed gems who still hadn't taken more than four steps onto the premises and cleared her throat.

“General. Your behaviour today was uncalled for, disrespectful, and will not be tolerated in the future.” Bear’s face softened, “But we know what it’s like to be new, and everyone has horrid first days. You’ve clearly shown us that you want to belong here, and we sincerely appreciate you cleaning up our living quarters.”

Yellow simply bowed her head, as a show of acknowledgment and thanks.

The others piled into the tent as if nothing had happened at all, the lamps grew bright and the generals laughed and joked for a few lovely collections of moments. But as always the best moments seem to end the quickest and the joyful, joking air faded into the dirt floor as the generals gathered together to discuss their plans.

“Squadron AC7 is currently out on mission, when they return we can all convene with Rose and plan our next big strike.” Emerald spoke in a hushed voice.

“I hope their mission is going well, we need a win in our corner.” Bis replied, back from the forge. “Not to mention that I can’t stand to lose more folks.”

The group nodded, Yellow simply watched intently from her cot, unable to join the meeting.

“Peach, can you foresee anything about AC7’s outcome on the field?” Emerald translated for Bo.

She thought for a moment, “I-... we’re gonna be lucky if we can achieve a stalemate.” she replied in a despondent voice.

There was a collective sigh of defeat, these gems were exhausted. Yellow had watched her army fight them before, but it seems as though the gems she had fought were shells of what they once were. If they continued on like this, the war was hers. Pink would have her colony back under control, and Yellow could move on with her own.

“Cat’s Eye, we need your input.” Emerald called to the shadow that stood responsibly outside the tent.

The gem strode inside and stopped, robotically at the table at which the general’s were huddled around. They projected a scene from their gem eye, it depicted a series of guerilla tactic strikes in a few key locations. It took yellow a moment before she realized that she recognized those locations: her military bases.

She had thought they were secret.

“We can try, but we’re going to need more squadrons to participate. One won’t be enough.” Jazz replied.

“I agree. The plan is a good one, mate. But I think we still might need to wait on a meeting with all the squadrons before we can go through with it.” Ame concurred.

“What should we do in the meantime?” Bis inquired, absentmindedly filling out weapon reports.

“We should prepare our forces for Cat’s Eye’s ideal attacks. Maybe get the fusion brigades in shape?” Peach sighed, running her fingers through her hair.

“We need a morale boost.” Jazz interpreted roughly for Bo.

The Jasper perked up, but the group quickly shut her down.

“Sorry Jazz, ya classes are a little more niche then what we’re looking for.” Ame patted the now frowning gem’s back, a sympathetic smile upon her face.

“Rose said that she’ll conduct some sort of morale boosting speech or ceremony or something or other before the end of the month. She’s aware of the problem. She says as long as there are more recruits that are coming in we should continue to stay afloat morale wise.” Emerald responded.

“So for now…?” Jazz prompted, her shoulders still slumped, her head in her hands.

“For now we prepare.” Emerald finished, “I just pray to the stars above that Ac7 isn’t obliterated in the meantime.”

Yellow knew her troops would do their best to ensure the opposite. With that thought, Yellow returned to polishing her sword. She shook any of her thoughts about the stars above out of her head

[fuzzydemolitionsquad]

The tractor part three

A greater whipkillow flew high above the winding mountain road, its vee-shaped body held aloft by warm thermal updrafts. It followed the racy Sorosuub speeder for a few klicks– then, deciding that its occupants were too large to make a meal of–gracefully rolled toward the west and soared on. Zeb handled the winding two-lane with no trouble whatsoever. After all, he had cut his driving fangs on roads like this one when he was a kid no bigger than Puggles. Speaking of Puggles. He thought to himself. He checked his chrono and sighed. One agonizing hour of awkward silence had passed. Under normal circumstances, it was a blessing when Puggles was quiet but this silent treatment was driving Zeb mynock-shit crazy. He cleared his throat and pointed over his shoulder to the small back seat of the speeder where a plastoid packing crate sat. “So, I found the perfect parts for pa’s tractor.” There was a long pause, then- “Whoop-dee-diddley doo.” Puggles finally said, under his breath. “Actually,” Zeb continued. “I found a lot of good parts. Do you think pa would like a high performance tractor engine? Sure would make pa Lunxx jealous.” The little brown lasat sat up in his seat and tagged his cousin with a glossy-eyed stare. “ I cain’t believe yew! Yer jus gunna ferget what y said t’ me back there in thee city? Talk to me like nuttin' ever happened? Puggles ain’t got no feelin’s, huh? Tis a’right t’ tear him down. It ain’t like he’s a normal lasat anyway.” “Puggles, about what I said– “Hells, Zeb!” The big purple lasat was cut off. “I know I’m a drunk. I admit it. I ain’t never hid it from nobody. Not Jenni, not Ma nor Pa nor thee bounty hunters’ guild. Sure I got the thirst. I got the shakes right now thinking ‘bout my next cold one. It hurt a little when yew threw that in my face, but when yew called me disgustin, I don’t know’. . . Twas like a dagger in th’ heart. Like ol’ Puggles is so unpleasant and rotten and such that yew wanna un-relate yerself to him.” Zeb’s eyes widened. “No, no. You’re getting me wrong. I didn’t mean that at all. I was just mad.” “I could feel it, Zeb. Deep in my innards. I has t’ get it through my noggin that yew is all growed up and smart an’ stuff.” The little lasat knocked on his fuzzy head. “My brain ain’t like a citified brain. I cain’t keep up wit yew there. I unnerstand why yew hate me and hate me bee’in round yer friends. I’m a bigger shame t’ yew than yer no-good daddy.” Great big tears spilled down Puggles’ cheeks. Zeb pulled off the road onto the evergreen needle strewn shoulder. “Shows how little you know.” He grabbed Puggles and squeezed him tight. It wasn’t as much of a comforting hug as it was a need-to-be-comforted hug. “I love you, cousin. It's just. . . Well, it’s really me, not you. I have a lot of new friends, and I’m not gonna lie, sometimes I feel out of place in the city. In the academy. I doubt myself. I always wonder if I’m smart enough or strong enough or if I give off the right ‘warrior vibe’. Lasats make fun of my accent. Sometimes my superiors say I’m extremely talented . . . for a hayseed! What’s that supposed to mean? Am I impressing them or not? My grades speak for themselves, but what am I saying? Will lasats take me seriously? Am I Honor guard material or am I some sort of joke?” Puggles squirmed out of Zeb’s crushing grasp, grabbed his shoulders and looked at him. The purple lasat was panting. His eyes were bulging and his stress-scent was blooming. “They called you a hayseed? A karabastin’ hayseed?? What a bunch of . . . y’ know what? Kark them book-humpin’ tea drinkin’ art gallery attendin’ formal attire and what-have-you wearin’ assholes! I seed you study war strategies all day, straight thru suppertime and into thee night! Yew’ve climbed ironwood trees to the tippy-top and down in twenty seconds and bench pressed hammerhead calfs until they wuz full-grown bulls!! Yew is smart enough and strong enough and y’ has a right-impressive dignity. Ain't no lie Zeb. All yew gotta work on iz yer patience. Y’ cain

[aces-miild]

Finders Keepers

Swapfell/Fellswap drabble

In which: Papyrus finds a human in waterfall’s dump and decides that it’s his.

Papyrus wades through the shin-high water of he dump, his torn jeans rolled up to his knees to keep them from getting soaked. He leans over one of the many piles of garbage. This one looks...promising. 

He opens the door to a dented mailbox with a broken wooden post attached, and finds a terrified Froggit inside. It lets out a tiny cry of terror and backs up as far as it can. 

“Shh! I’m not...I ain’t here to hurt ya, see?” he whispers. “Y’can just...stay in there, ‘kay? I won’t tell nobody yer here.” he closes the mailbox gently, and backs away. 

Moving on, he circles the pile and lifts the rusted lid to an equally rusted garbage bin. Inside is a soaked body pillow - the face of some random anime twink dotted with mold and stained with stars-know-what. 

“Hey, loser, ya find anything yet??” Undyne shouts from the other end of the dump. 

“Nah,” he answers casually. He’s helping her look for discarded lab equipment from the surface - or anything that could potentially be used as lab equipment - so he doesn’t feel the need to tell her about the nasty body pillow. 

Especially since he knows she might actually want to keep it for some gross reason.

He puts the lid back on the trash can and moves on to another pile. This one’s got some cardboard boxes in it that somehow survived the fall and being partially submerged. He rustles through them, and comes across something truly rare - a game console! It’s cube-shaped, with a handle and everything. No wires or controllers, though. Still, Undyne might be able to do something with it. 

“Hey, I got somethin’!” He calls, and hears Undyne’s sloshing footsteps from around the corner. 

He turns the console over in his hands, noting the disappointing but unavoidable water damage. He catches something - a flash of gold in the darkness - out of the corner of his eye-socket, and turns toward a seemingly dead end. There, he sees a patch of golden flowers somehow managing to flourish in the darkness. He places the cube on top of the garbage pile and walks over, marveling at how pretty the flowers are, their stems stretching up through the water so the blooms can rest on the surface. 

But there’s...something else? Something stuck there, barely visible between the petals. It looks like...a blanket? Or maybe a towel…? It’s fabric, he can tell that much, and he’s always on the lookout for new things to add to his wardrobe, so he reaches out and gives it a tug.

It’s stuck. 

He tugs harder, leaning down and pulling with both hands, and finds that the fabric is attached to something solid. In the gloom, it takes him a second to realize that the ‘something solid’ is a body.   

He yelps and lets go, falling backward into the shallow water. 

Undyne lets out a harsh laugh. “What the fuck?” 

“I...there...it’s…” Papyrus stutters, unable to get the words out. He can see the body clearer now that he knows what he’s looking at. He’d been pulling at the person’s - at the human’s shirt...

Undyne sloshes over and gently kicks him in the spine. “Spit it out!”

He shakes his head. No use trying to form words when he’s this rattled. Literally, his bones have started shaking, and it’s making a real racket. His face is flushed a light purple in embarrassment. He points to the flower bed.

With her modified glasses [equipped with night, heat, and soul-vision], Undyne has no trouble seeing the body hidden beneath the flower bed.

“Oh, shit...Hang on, Paps, I gotta call Alph...uh...General Alphys.” She pulls her phone from the pocket of her lab coat and walks a short distance away to call her gal-pal. “Don’t! Move!”

Papyrus doesn’t...for a bit. He can’t. His femurs might as well be overcooked noodles. But once he regains his composure a bit, he...can’t help but be curious. He’s always wanted to see a human in person...they’re so interesting! They even have their own skeletons hidden inside them! 

But...he didn’t want...he never wanted to see one dead…

He gets up and goes to kneel beside the flowerbed, no longer concerned about getting his jeans wet. He pushes the golden flowers aside to get a better look. 

The human has a huge gash on their face, probably from hitting a rock or something on the way down from...well, the surface, probably. Geez...what a fall. There’s red fluid - blood, he remembers reading about blood - dripping from it, as well as some crusted around the wound. Despite the injury, their expression is completely serene, like they’re just sleeping. There are small scrapes and scratches all over their arms, and a few on their exposed upper chest, which is...moving? Nah, must be a trick of the light.

He reaches out and places a hand on their chest, finding that it’s pleasantly warm - certainly warmer than the tepid water surrounding the body. He can feel their sternum! It’s right there, under the skin! He taps it, and a little shiver goes up his spine at how strange it feels. He can see their collarbones, too! He runs a finger over them, pulling back suddenly when he feels something move under the surface of the human’s skin. He can’t see anything, so he brushes his hand over the spot again. 

“It’s...a pulse. The human has a pulse...” he mutters.

“What??” Undyne shouts from behind him.

“It has a pulse!” he repeats excitedly. 

Undyne’s face splits into a terrifyingly toothy smile. “That means it has a SOUL!” She’s thrilled, though Papyrus isn’t exactly sure why. Of course it has a SOUL? Doesn’t everything…? She goes back to talking to Alphys on the phone.

Papyrus slides his hands into the water and under the human, scooping them out of the water and resting them on his femurs. They’re...small. Smaller than he thought humans were supposed to be. But they’re not wearing stripes, so they must be fully grown. Papyrus can see the rest of their body now - their boots, torn pants, and even their hair - wow, it has hair! Papyrus always wished he could have hair. It’s long, and tied up, like how Undyne keeps hers. He picks some stray bits of trash out of it.  

A human. A real, live human! And he found it! Sans would be so proud! [So proud...he might even... let Papyrus keep it?]

He starts a bit when Undyne’s scaly hand clamps down on his shoulder. “Nice job, Paps! I never would’a noticed it over here.”

“I almost didn’t...it was hidden in the flowers.”

She nods. “Alphys and a couple guards are coming to pick it up. The Queen’s gonna be stoked!”

Papyrus’s SOUL sinks.

“What? Why are they gonna take it to the Queen? What does she want with it?” Papyrus is certain Sans told him that the Queen hated humans. So why...?

Undyne looks at him incredulously. “Uh, hello? She needs the SOUL?”

“For what??” 

“To break the barrier, ya dingus! How do you not know this??? Your brother’s in the Royal Guard!”

Papyrus huffs. “He doesn’t tell me anything…” And what Sans does tell him is usually a lie to make him feel better. To protect him from reality...this reality. 

When Papyrus finally puts two and two together, his body goes cold.

“You’re gonna kill ‘em.”

Undyne rolls her eye. “Uh, duh? That’s how you get the SOUL out, moron.”

Papyrus stands up so suddenly that Undyne hits her chin on his shoulder. 

She stumbles back.“Hey, what’s your problem?”

He doesn’t like the idea of Alphys handling the human. She’s all rough edges, battle-hardened and filled with hatred for humans [the ones not in anime, anyway]. She’ll end up carrying the poor thing like a sack of potatoes, or worse...and it’s already been through so much…

“...General Alphys doesn’t need to come all the way here. I can carry it.”

Undyne seems...unsure. “All the way to the castle?”

“It’s not heavy.” He insists. “It’s actually...really light??” You’d think that, with all the extra bits, it’d be heavier.  

Undyne relents. “Yeah, sure. Knock yerself out, I guess.” 

They wait for Alphys and her subordinates to arrive. Walking through the Underground with a human in your arms makes defending yourself a lot harder, and they don’t want to take any chances with the human and its precious SOUL. 

On the way, Papyrus tries to come up with a plan to save the human. There has to be a way. He could talk to his brother about it! As Captain of the Guard, Sans has to have some say in what happens at the castle! And...if that didn’t work, he’d just have to talk to the Queen himself!

...He’s never actually met her in person, and has heard terrifying tales of her temper, but...but…! Even if she’s scary, he has to try! He found this human! He should get to decide what happens to it!

With every step he takes towards the capital, he grows more determined to protect his human.

[durrzerker]

Taskmaster: The Line. Chapter 2: Babysitting

Hey everyone! As promised, I’m releasing a new Chapter of my Taskmaster fanfic every Tuesday. This week’s Chapter 2: Babysitting can be found at Archive of Our Own, but I’m also releasing it in text format below for those who don’t want to go to AO3:

Chapter 2: Babysitting.

The pouring rain was battering the roof of the toppled APC with enough force to echo loudly throughout the interior, but Taskmaster didn't even notice. His eyes never left the group of children huddled within, and when Black Ant started to speak, his voice was only a distant droning in his right ear. It took nearly ten seconds for the senior mercenary to snap himself out of his fugue, regarding his partner with something akin to shock.

"...Tasky--TASKY! Hey! Damn, buddy. We lose you for a second?" Black Ant looked confused, and Taskmaster couldn't blame him. In all their time working together, the size-shifter hadn't ever seen his former mentor so stunned. "What are we gonna do, man? We're in the middle of Bagalia's most dangerous district, and there's a bunch of brats stashed away?" Turning his head to the kids, Eric lifted a hand. "No offense, brats." Unsurprisingly, they didn't respond; they just kept regarding the pair with wide eyes and shaking bodies.

"Waterfall's dead, right? Not trying to...I dunno, crawl away or nothin'?" Taskmaster asked. There must have been something in his tone, because the normally snarky Eric actually took the time to peek around the back of the truck at their fallen enemy.

"Well, he's smoking and not moving. I'm gonna say yeah! Probably dead."

"...Gimme a sec. Watch the kids." Circling the vehicle until Jason's body came into sight, Tony reached down to his hip with his left hand. He didn't like guns; found them not particularly sporting, far too loud, and a little inflexible when it came to live captures. Right now, though, he was glad he had one as he drew it in a blur, emptying twelve shots into the body on the ground. Each bullet tore another piece out of the dead man, leaving him visibly riddled with holes and bleeding out by the time the skull-masked killer was finished. Reloading the gun, Tony seriously considered emptying another clip inside of him...but this was his last one, and you never knew what the day would hold. Reluctantly, he re-holstered the pistol and approached the APC again.

"Hey, kids...don't worry about those sounds. My partner's just working out his deeply repressed anger issues, you know? I promise--augh! AUGH! TASKY, HELP!" Eric's voice rang out in a panic.

Taskmaster broke into a run, nearly slipping on the wet road as he flung himself around the corner of the armored truck. "What is it, lil' buddy?! Reinforce--" Well, he was not prepared for what he saw. No sooner did Taskmaster return to Black Ant than he saw four of the five children they had just found jumping him, assaulting Eric with their small fists and feet. Eric was holding them off, flinging one away and shielding his face before lifting his knee to block another, but Taskmaster didn't need photographic reflexes to realize what was off here; these weren't normal kids. They were -trained-.

"What is that...is that fucking -Red Room-?" Taskmaster asked, shocked. One of the children, a mousy-looking girl who had to be maybe seven or eight, caught sight of Taskmaster. With a fearless howl of anger, she lunged at him, assaulting the mercenary with a kick that he immediately identified as the martial art of Savate. "Hey, watch it--" Taskmaster replied as he nudged his shield to intercept. She had good technique, but she was so small - and clearly starved - that there wasn't much power behind it.

"RED ROOM, BLUE ROOM, ONE FISH! TWO FISH! I DON'T CARE GET THEM OFF ME! I don't wanna hurt these kids, but I wanna be hurt by them even less!" With two of the children battering the red lenses of his mask and a third pummeling at his groin, Eric wasn't having a good time of it. To his credit, Tony could tell he wasn't actually fighting back, at least not seriously.

"Quit panicking and just grow, O'Grady!" Taskmaster barked to Black Ant. "They're already half yer size; make 'em even smaller! Or get small yerself...heh; talk to them on their level -- ow!" He winced as, while he was distracted, the girl who had been assaulting him punched him square in the stomach - right where Waterfalls had cracked a few of his ribs. "Hrgh...you lil' shit! I'm on YOUR side here!"

Glaring up at him, apparently suspicious but judging it worth exploring, the child stepped back and lifted a hand. She was apparently the leader of the group, because as soon as she did so, the others leaped off of O'Grady - who was now nearly ten feet tall and growing in an attempt to get them off him - and fell into line behind her. Even battered and all skin and bones, they looked intelligent, focused, and deadly; the 'wide-eyed terror' from before was gone; clearly nothing but an act. "Only five of you jumping us like weird little gremlins," Tony remarked. "Where's the sixth?"

The brown-haired girl jabbed a thumb over her shoulder towards the APC as Black Ant shrank back to normal. "Hurt in the crash, broken leg," she replied. "Your doing, I assume." Taskmaster didn't get a hint of a Russian accent, but those were pretty easy to hide for Red Room trainees. He'd have to ask if he wanted to know the truth. Rubbing at his ribs, he tested the damage with a series of small pokes. One definitely broken, another cracked; the rest just felt extremely bruised.

"Yeah, it was. Sorry; we didn't know they were transporting...live cargo." Just the words made him feel sick to his stomach, but even worse was the fact he knew that he'd considered using a bigger arrow for this task. What if he'd pulled a wide-band particle explosive, like that one he'd used years ago when dealing with The Thing? He could have killed them. He could have killed all of them. Would that have bothered him? The fact he legitimately didn't know certainly did.

"...Look, you kids are clearly trained to fight. You mind explaining the situation? I happen to be SHERIFF 'round these here parts--" Using his sword, he tapped at his badge. They couldn't see it, but he was smiling with genuine pride behind his mask. Then again, the skull face he wore did have a strange flexibility to it; at times it really did seem to reflect his expressions beneath. He chalked it up to good craftsmanship.

"--Oh my god," Eric interjected.

"--And I consider it my responsibility - no, my PRIVILEGE - to aid you in these dark and troubled times."

"I will tell you nothing. You are The Taskmaster," the girl said, jabbing a thumb behind her. "And that is The Black Ant. Gun-thugs for hire, loyal to nothing and nobody."

"Hey, we're famous!" Eric chirped, planting his hands proudly on his hips.

"...And you are to be TRUSTED with nothing and nobody, least of all my people. Get out of our way. We will escape on our own." Snorting authoritatively, the girl started back towards the APC. "Akeja! Load Sven up for transportation, fireman's carry." A slightly larger girl with half-ruined braids climbed into the vehicle, grabbing the wounded boy inside. "Got it, Commander!"

Exchanging a look, the two mercenaries watched the children methodically address their wounded comrade. "God, it's like an Oompa Loompa war film," Black Ant mused.

"Yeah, wait - that girl, Akeja," Taskmaster commented. "That was a Wakandan accent. Now I -really- gotta know what's going on."

"Better figure it out quick, they're leaving."

"To hell they are." Taskmaster set out to block the path of the children, who unanimously regarded him with threatening looks; even little Sven, blonde and blue-eyed, hanging across Akeja's shoulders like a limp weight.

"Look; I get it. You don't trust us, and I don't blame you. But if you know who we are, you know -where- we are. This is Bagalia; you can't go two blocks without stumbling onto supervillains, and they aren't even the worst people in this town. You think whoever was paying Waterfalls to transport you is going to let this go? He was high-end muscle; you all represent a significant investment."

"And you want to collect on us yourself," their 'Commander' responded. "You'll have to kill us all! We're NOT going back! Not for anything!" Her voice, which had made such an attempt at cool arrogance only a minute ago, was starting to break. She looked and sounded legitimately scared, and with Taskmaster's ability to read body language, he could tell that as she tensed up, she wasn't preparing to attack; she was trying to keep from collapsing.

Taskmaster greatly preferred to speak off the cuff. He had an extremely poor memory and he didn't like to come off rehearsed, but right now, he felt the rare need to choose his words carefully. He didn't bother squatting down in front of the kids; it felt disingenuous, plus he was pretty sure they were still thinking of jumping him and he didn't want to be off-balance. But he DID place his sword back at his belt; he'd just been using to to show off his badge anyways. "Look, I get it." He could do this. He could, just this once, actually take this seriously. "Yer wounded, tired, hungry, and scared -- don't gimme that look, there's no shame in it -- Ya been through a lot, and now you got someone who's famous for doing anything for money extending a helping hand. It ain't right, is it? Havin' to try and figure out what to do, not just for yourself, but your people? Being a leader sucks; trust me, I've been there. But I ain't asking you to follow me through the mean streets of Bagalia and hide out at my safehouse so I can turn ya over to someone else, alright? Wherever you six are from, whatever happened to bring you here; I wanna fix it. I -do- take my duties as Sheriff seriously, even if ya might not think I should. Just because this place has no laws don't mean it can't have -ethics-."

The children regarded him for a moment, then turned to their commander; then, they all turned inwards to whisper to each other in a language that even Taskmaster didn't recognize, and he spoke almost a dozen himself. There were hints of African, Chinese, Russian, and South American dialogues - but it all fused together into something that he suspected only these six kids could understand. This was -their- tongue. While they conversed, Taskmaster glanced up to check the skies. All grey, and the rain wasn't letting up. This was unpleasant, but it was also useful. Rain was easier to hide in.

So easy, in fact, someone else was doing it too. If not for the fact he was cycling his mask's thermal imaging systems out of sheer habit, he would have missed it. Next block over, in a sedan that had parked around the corner. Interesting.

Finally, their leader turned back to him. "...I am Mara," she said after a moment, "And we are the Scions; refugees from programs all over the world that exploit children as soldiers and killers. I will not explain more in public like this, but as you can likely surmise, we are highly sought after by the respective organizations that are pursuing us. We are placing our trust in you - however unwisely - at least until we can escape Bagalia. Will you help us, Taskmaster?"

"I will, but I'm gonna need some help. I gotta contact The Hub. They'll have an idea for how to do this quietly. Wait...Wakanda's training child soldiers?" He asked.

Akeja stiffened. "How DARE you! Of course not; I was stolen away from my home!"

"Yeah, yeah, just checking."

Mouthpiece and organizer for The Org, the mysterious criminal organization that facilitated mercenary work worldwide, The Hub served in many ways as Taskmaster's handler. The enigmatic woman was nothing more than a voice on the other end of the earpiece he was always wearing inside of his mask, the only number he always kept in his phone, and yet he trusted her more than anyone else alive. Even Tony wasn't sure why; she just...made him feel something, and he'd learned long ago to trust his gut.

"This...Hub can be trusted too?" Mara asked warily. "Will they not sell us out to other mercenaries?"

"No, no, Hub is good people. Promise. Come on, let's get out of this fucking rain while I call her." He ushered the children to follow him, but when Black Ant began to join them, Taskmaster intercepted him. "Eric, I got another job for you."

"What? You're cutting me out, old man?!" Black Ant threw his hands up. "You better not be about to sell these kids behind my back. I put up with a lot from you, but -- OW!" He doubled over as Taskmaster socked him in the gut. "You son of a..."

"Shut up," Tony hissed, leaning down. "Someone's watching us, two streets over. Probably backup for Waterfall's crew. I'm gonna hit you again, like I'm screwing you over here; I need you to go down. After we leave, they'll come to try and collect you. Surprise them and figure out who they're working for."

"...Okay, but you owe me for this."

"Yeah, sure."

"I mean it, you 'new car' owe me for this!" Eric whispered before collapsing as Taskmaster kneed him savagely in the stomach. "Too...real."

"Thanks, little buddy." Taskmaster turned and pursued the children with that, joining them as they ran into a nearby alleyway. It was still pouring, but the awnings of the adjacent buildings meant that the soaked kids were at least not still getting rained on. Taking the lead, Taskmaster crossed the alley and pointed at a large, black building a few blocks away. "We're heading there. Used to be Zemo's mansion before Punisher ran him out of town. Hub will likely want us to meet her people there to get you extracted."

"Fine," Mara replied. Taskmaster pressed a button on his phone, a 'hotdial' for The Org that connected to his mask. In the distance, he could hear the car approaching where he'd left Black Ant. He hoped he hadn't put Eric up against someone who was too much for him. Waterfall had been no joke, despite the name.

"Taskmaster," came the familiar female voice. Immediately, he relaxed despite the situation. She just had that effect on him. "Looking for work? Things are a bit slow right now, but for my best operative, I always--"

"--Sorry to cut ya off, Hub, but I'm actually already busy. I need an extraction." He felt weirdly guilty interrupting her.

"An extraction from Bagalia? I'm surprised anyone could drive you out of that hive."

"It's not for me. There's some...kids. Bunch of them."

"Oh, no, Tony," The Hub replied. "You didn't have anything to do with this, did you? Are your memories acting up?"

"What? No! NO!" He barked, offended. "I -saved- them! Jeez! You know I don't take work without running it by you. And I didn't -- look, don't worry about it. It's related to the King Shark gig. They were the...'cargo' he was overhearing." Wait. Did she just call him Tony? They never used names.

There was a pause, the kind he never expected. As professional as she was, The Hub almost never hesitated. "...Okay. I'll look into it, and I'm sending someone. Get them to Zemo's old helipad...stay safe, Taskmaster."

"Yeah, already on the way. Thanks." Cutting the call, Taskmaster glanced back over his shoulder to the children. "Alright, let's go back out. Try to move, but not -too- fast. That damned Hydro Man wannabe busted up my ribs somethin' fie--er...hi."

The children had already scattered, fleeing back towards the street. They were hiding behind another figure who'd just appeared, a small woman who nonetheless had the strength to hurl an unconscious Black Ant at Tony's feet.

"I knew you were low, Taskmaster...but this is bad, even for you."

Laura Kinney, the Wolverine, was blocking the only way back out of the alleyway, and wearing an expression of complete disgust.

[theateared]

It’s Good to See You. ❜

Summary:  You’re my brother, and that won’t ever change.

    A lot of things were spiralling in Aléjandro Murphy’s life at the moment.  His identity crisis had come centuries too late and it was expensive for his mental health.  The progress he’d made on eating and managing his self esteem was swirling down the drain, and he felt he could do nothing except watch his healthy habits abandon him.

    How can I have any self-esteem when I’ve ruined my own life?     How can I eat when I feel like I don’t deserve to do anything except  slowly starve to death?     How can I continue having faith in my medication when I do things to stop it working?

    He knew better than to take his problems to Edgar.  He had said time and time again that people were responsible for their own health, and he didn’t feel as if he disagreed with that. Though he wished the Alpha would be a little more receptive when it came to listening to those struggling, he ultimately thought that he was right.  Nobody else was to blame for his choices, and nobody else could be expected to shoulder his burden.  

    His visits to his therapist had become less frequent for this reason.  There’s just nothing you can do for me right now.  This is something I have to work through on my own  -  or die trying.

    It had been two weeks since Tilly had left, and he felt it had been just as long since he’d eaten a meal.  He snacked infrequently when on the verge of passing out, feeling immediately guilty once the pain in his stomach ebbed away.  He tried not to stay in his house too much.  That was a recipe for disaster.  The last time he’d done so, he’d burned it to the ground.  When he stayed inside, he traversed his expansive hallways like paths in a labyrinth, convinced that he didn’t recognise the wallpaper because it looked different when he looked at it whilst alone.  He’d gone through the painstaking process of turning all of his photographs around, mirrors too, unable to look at himself without feeling an intense rage building in his stomach.

    She gave everything a glow.  Now it’s all monochrome, and I only have myself to blame.

    He was staring blankly out of his kitchen window when there was a knock at his door.  It almost didn’t register.  For a moment, he considered ignoring it;  about forgetting all about the existence of other people and heading up to bed.  If he wasn’t drinking, he was sleeping.  It was just the way he dealt with pain.

    It could be Kuro.

    That fact alone saw him dragging his feet to the door, groggy and drained.  Truthfully, he didn’t feel much of a desire to converse with anybody, and Kuro was no exception to this.  However, he also knew that, if the Sheriff really wanted to see him, he’d use the key he gave him to get in regardless.

    When he cracked the door open, seeing a pair of grey eyes through the slit, he sighed heavily and shut it again, sliding the latch out of place and opening it properly, leaning against the doorframe.

    “Thank fuck,”   Kuro muttered, shouldering his way past him until he was stood in the hallway.  Once he was inside, Murr closed the door wordlessly, finding that he didn’t have the energy to greet him.  He felt a heavy hand on his shoulder, though his warmth barely touched him.   “What the fuck, Murr.  ‘s been three weeks since we last spoke.  Y’didn’t return any’a my calls ‘n’ I haven’t seen y’in the theatre.  I thought y’fuckin’ died or somethin’.”   He took note of his friend’s exhausted body language then.  Though his tight frown and heavy eyes remained obscured, his bent spine and the way he leaned against the door for support wasn’t lost on him.   “Hey…  I know, alright?  I know.”

    Before yesterday, he hadn’t known.  In fact, it was only a chance encounter with Tilly that had alerted him of their situation.  At first, he had asked whether they were fighting, spotting that her ring wasn’t in its usual place almost immediately.  She had crumbled under the weight of his question, mumbling a quick explanation before hastily making her way back to the house they'd built for her.  It was strange to see her going that way instead of up the hill, the hill that took them to The Murphy Orchard.

                                                              Alé says he’s gay so it can’t work anymore.

    He watched as Murr slumped further, as if his gaze brought him shame.  He flinched as Kuro squeezed his shoulder gently before he released it again, taking his arm and guiding him in the direction of the kitchen.  Once in there, he flicked the light on and sat his friend down at the table, turning to the counter to boil the kettle.  Some tea might do you good.

    “... how’s everythin’ workin’ fer y’?”   Kuro asked hesitantly, pouring the water into a mug. Just like Murr knew how he liked his coffee, Kuro knew how Murr liked his tea.  He was about the only person he would trust to make him one--  at least, the only person that wasn’t his wife.

    “It’s not,”   Murr replied hoarsely, staring vacantly out of the window once more.  His attention was only earned when a steaming hot mug was placed gently in front of him, and after a moment of debating with himself, he curled a hand around its handle and brought it to his lips.  The burn was immediate, tongue scalded painfully, but he drank more nonetheless.  It made his throat feel tickly and irate.

    “Y’should’a said somethin’,”   Kuro said with a sigh as he sat down at the table.  He was near, beside him, though not invading his personal space.  He suspected that the last thing Murr wanted at the moment was to have his bubble burst.   “Raku knows how horrible this is fer you.  Tilly’s in bits.  ‘n’ I know you…  yer blamin’ yerself, no doubt.”

     The Sheriff observed his friend’s silence with a hint of pain in his face, usually blank slate slightly more malleable when face to face with turmoil.  Murr’s depression was a frightful thing. When it wasn’t burying its way through him like a tapeworm, making him hurt himself and sleep days away, it was keeping him vacant.  His body was awake but his soul was not, and had he been given the choice, he would’ve liked to stay asleep in all senses of the word.  Permanently, even.

    “We don’t gotta talk about it now,”   he said patiently, hands clasping as his upper body leaned closer.  Despite their limited distance, he’d never felt further away from him in his life.   “But I want y’t’know that ‘m here.  ‘n’ I ain’t goin’ nowhere.  I don’t care what y’are, Alé.  All that matters is yer my best friend.”

    Being gay wasn’t the problem.  Both men knew that.  But it was a problem when it sabotaged a relationship that another person was involved in--  somebody that he was no longer compatible with because of it.  He harboured no resentment towards his orientation, nor others of the same leaning, only that it had arisen to his attention so late.  Could you not have surfaced in college like you do with everybody else?  Could you not have come to my attention before I got married to a wonderful woman and felt like I was finally getting my life together?

    “... it’s good y’see you, Murr.  I hope y’know that.”

    He didn’t.  How could he?  How could he sit there and lap up the attention like a cat would milk when he knew that he was responsible for this mess?  How could he pretend to feel wanted when he’d likely made a perfectly capable, perfectly beautiful girl feel as if she wasn’t good enough for him?  What hurt him the most was that she had met him with such compassion.  It had burned a hole through his resolve, left him agonised long after she’d left.  Part of him wanted so badly for her to declare her hatred for him;  to slap and punch and cry while telling him that he was the worst thing that had ever happened to her;  that he ruined her life  -  because that was how it felt.

     “... I don’t know what I’m gonna do, Kuro…”   he admitted, voice sounding hollow and taut, like an elastic band being stretched to its limit.   “I fucked it all…  everythin’ I had.  Gone.”

    “Don’t say things like that,”   Kuro replied, his hand reaching for his.  His wrist was pat gently, coarse fingers tender against his sleeve.   “You’ll get through it.  Same as y’ve gotten through everythin’ else.  Y’ve dealt with so much.  Y’ve been abandoned.  Ostracised. Survived on yer own in the wild.  Lost both’a yer parents.  This will not be the death’a you. Y’ll be alright.  ‘n’ if y’need help?  We’ll be there for you.  I’ll be there.”   He was squeezing gently now, trying to prompt some sort of eye contact, but Murr was having none of it.   “We’ll get through it together, yeah?  Through thick ‘n’ thin, no matter what.  Alright?”   When Murr still didn’t look at him, he squeezed tightly enough for it to hurt.  He heard the man hiss quietly, looking up.  In a more tense voice:   “Alright?”   Don’t you go doing stupid shit now.

    “... alright…”   Murr replied feebly with a tiny nod, rubbing his wrist when Kuro let go.

    “Good.”   He glanced aside, then gestured to his cup with a swipe of his hand.   “Drink yer tea.”

    Murr did as he was told, grateful for a sense of direction.

[paladin-andric]

The Stranger

It’s about damn time, isn’t it?

Well, enjoy a fantasy western short story I haven’t gotten around to finishing for quite some time. Fair warning that this isn’t a genre I’m experienced in, so take that for what you will. Enjoy, however, wacky hijinks, bad wild west slang, magical cowboys fighting dragons, and an EXTREMELY strong reference to Blackheart! A mysterious stranger arrives to a town on brink of destruction, and promises to turn things around...

“Son of a bitch!”

A loud thud rang out as Red slammed a fist down onto his desk, fury written on his face.

He was an older man with gray hair, wrinkles on his face, and a bushy mustache. He slumped over, holding his temples with one hand while the other flexed in a fist, still held against the wooden surface of the desk.

Red wore a gray sleeveless vest, a white shirt with rolled up sleeves, and black pants. Topping off his ensemble was of course, his all-important badge. A silver, six pointed star with the word “SHERIFF” engraved with bold letters.

Another man was standing next to him. The accomplice had a slightly less tan complexion, and a goatee and mustache. He had a green jacket that was open down the middle, showing a tan shirt underneath. He also wore a white hat, and had a badge pinned to his jacket. It being a plain, five pointed star denoted that he was a standard officer.

“Sir, I know this is crazy but-”

“Crazy?! Crazy, boy?! This isn’t crazy…” the sheriff shook his head sadly. “This is a disaster!”

The lawman put his hands on his hips and looked down. “Shoot…don’t give up yet, sheriff. There’s a chance.”

“I don’t want a chance,” Red answered harshly, “I want to WIN! I want those damn leeches dead! I want those people SAFE! And now you say we got a damn monster to wrangle too?!”

“Everything bleeds,” the other man offered.

“Yeah...and we’ll be bleedin’ all over the ground soon enough!”

“Look, we gotta run NOW.”

Red sighed and took out his revolver, quietly spinning the cylinder, checking each chamber was loaded. The officer had never seen him like this before. He was normally so stoic, unflinching...of course, he could hardly blame him with he was burdened with, but still.

“Let’s go. Whatever happens, we gotta try to protect these folks.”

Red grimaced. “Better start prayin’ to God if you believe in him, boy...maybe he’ll help us out.”

“Maybe I can help you out, too.”

The unfamiliar voice made Red’s face shoot up.

In the doorway, quite a surprising figure stood sideways, leaning against the doorframe with a taloned foot resting against the frame as well. His head was turned to the side as to look straight at the pair of men.

A koutu, one of the birdfolk of the west was standing in the doorway. His feathers were white on his head and brown everywhere else. He wore a brown duster, sleeveless of course as to not interfere with his wings, with a red kerchief tied around his neck. Underneath was a brown button-up shirt, and he wore short pants as well. As they stopped at his raptor legs, Red assumed they were just for modesty’s sake.

He had a pistol holster at his side, pouches along his belt, and some sort of bag slung over his back. Finally, he had a brown hat with a wide brim atop him, looking like it was shaped custom-made for his avian head.

He looked at the pair with a confident though serious gaze, not a smile or smirk to be found. Red immediately jumped out of his seat, revolver firmly in his hand. The officer in the white hat held onto his holster.

“What the hell?!” The sheriff yelled out. The bird only reached up and tipped his hat.

“Howdy.”

“Who the hell are you?!” Red shouted, authoritative and snarling. If the bird had eyebrows, he would have been raising them.

“Nobody important, sir. Jus’ passin’ through.”

Red’s aggression quickly simmered, though he groaned and rolled his eyes. “Ugh. A wanderer, huh?”

“If you’d like. I prefer the term ‘wayfarer’ myself, sir.”

The officer in the white hat shrugged. “Sorry for the attitude, mister. Sheriff’s got a lot on his plate, you hear?”

“I hear ya.”

“Whaddya doin’ in my office, stranger?” Red demanded. The koutu looked to the side.

“Couldn’t help but overhear ya while I was passin’ by, you two. Sounds like you’re in a real fix. I’d like to help you fellas out, if I could.”

“And jus’ howdya think yer gonna help us? Kill all the bandits yerself? Or maybe you’d like to kill the goddamned dragon!”

“Well, not by myself. But I can pitch in.”

“Mighty kind offer,” the officer said with a nod, “We need all the help we can get.”

“Ain’t gonna do a thing,” Red said bitterly, “We’re all gonna get blasted to high heaven.”

“I’m worth my weight in bullets.”

“Oh yeah? You think yer some kind of hero? Think you can tumble with those beasties out there?” the sheriff said with a sneer.

For the first time since he appeared, the bird smirked.  “You’d be surprised…”

The sheriff shook his head and put his revolver in its holster. “It’s your funeral, stranger. Follow us.”

The koutu got off the doorframer and stepped to the side. “After you, gentlemen.”

The group of lawmen left the sheriff’s office with the koutu in tow. The bird was silent for some time until they began to make their way out of Pike’s Creek.

“So what’re you thinkin’? What’s yer strategy here?”

“Not a damn clue,” the sheriff admitted.

“We, uhh...we ain’t never had to deal with dragons before,” the officer said quietly, “Though we were thinkin’ maybe dynamite might blast that sucker out of his britches.”

“Dynamite?” the koutu said, voice dripping with skepticism.

“What’s the issue?” the officer shot back.

“Pah! Big lizard’ll just fly up! You’d better have the throwing arm of a god if you wanna reach em’ with those!”

“You got a better idea?!” the sheriff snapped.

The bird hesitated. “Actually...yeah.”

“And just what’s that?”

The koutu hurried up beside them and pulled out his revolver. It was large, long and looked heavy as hell.

“I’m gonna plug em’ full of holes.”

The sheriff scoffed. The officer gave the bird a funny look. “You sure that’s a good idea, mister?” “You’ll see,” the koutu offered.

“Yer crazy!” Red shouted, “Yer as good as dead if you think you can just up n’ shoot that beastie!”

“You’ll see,” he repeated. The sheriff shook his head again.

“God, why do I always get the loony ones?”

“Uh, hey,” the officer interrupted, “I’m sure you’re a good shot and all, and that’s one hell of a big iron, but this ain’t no outlaw.”

“Oh, I know. This ain’t the first dragon I’ve tangled with.”

The officer looked genuinely surprised at that. “No kidding?! Well shoot, maybe you really can get us outta this, then…”

“You’ve fought one of these things before?!” Red questioned, his anger seeming to melt at the realization.

The bird nodded. “Yup. She was a biggun, lemme tell ya. ‘Course I had help during that scuffle.”

“How’d ya do it?” the officer asked.

“Well, me n’ a few other gunslingers rounded up a posse. Ganged up on ‘er. We had all sortsa big guns on our side so it wasn’t too bad. Speakin’ of...am I gettin’ any help from you or the rest of your folks?”

“We’re uh, a little busy, what with the gang comin’ to town n’ all.” the officer answered with a frown.

“Ah...well, what about you two?”

“We’ll pitch in...as long as we can,” the sheriff answered grimly.

“Appreciate it. You don’t have to go too crazy out there. Keep your distance. Just make sure to pop off a few rounds whenever I’m in a fix, ya hear?”

“Well shoot, don’t wanna leave you doing all the work out there,” the officer announced, “Shouldn’t be the rear guard, now!”

“You know any fancy spells?” the koutu questioned.

“Naw, not a soul ‘round these parts.”

“Then don’t push yourself. Just trust me. I should be fine.”

“If you say so…”

The harsh, unforgiving rays of the sun were starting to make all three of them sweat and sigh, and they hadn’t even started exerting themselves yet! They reached the outer limits of town, the lines of wooden buildings coming to an end as they began their march to the river outside.

“Say, I didn’t catch your names,” the bird said, turning his head to the pair.

The officer in the white hat spared him a glace. “Ah. Well, the name’s Michaels. Officer Michaels.” He pointed a thumb over to the sheriff. “Aaand that there’s Red. Sheriff, sure as you could tell.”

“I see. A pleasure to meet you folks.”

There was a long pause as the three walked. Finally, Michaels turned to look at the koutu again.

“...so?”

The bird shot him a look back. “So...it’s nice to be acquainted.”

“But we ain’t.”

“Whaddya mean?”

“You haven’t introduced yourself.”

The koutu shrugged. “I haven’t.”

Michaels frowned. “Y’know, it’s mighty rude not to introduce yerself after everyone else has.”

As they talked, the group neared the edge of a cliffside. Near where they were there was a massive arch of stone hanging over one side of the cliff to the other, almost like a miniature tunnel. There was also a large drop below, and on the other side the ground came back to the same level. A gorge. A gorge with a large river flowing through it.

A gorge where a dragon was currently sitting.

The beast wasn’t too large, likely a young adult. It had red scales, a firebreather. He was currently lying in the river, head resting against the rocky grounds while his body was partially submerged. Was he washing up? Stopping to drink? Just taking a dip?

The koutu didn’t know, but he did know one thing; his target was waiting.

“Tell ya what,” he spoke in a whisper, “If I live through this, I’ll tell ya my name. How’s that?”

“Oh, fer-”

“Yeah yeah,” he interrupted the sheriff, “You two, take some cover,” he pointed at a large boulder beside them, “I’m goin’ in.”

“You nut!” Red whispered back, “He’ll charr ya to smithereens!”

“Just back me up n’ we should all be headin’ back soon,” the koutu assured him.

“Well...shoot, alright,” Michaels muttered, “But I still got the dynamite.”

“Get it ready, you won’t have a chance once he’s in the air.” The koutu took a deep breath. “...here we go. Best a’ luck to ya, officers.”

The koutu spread his wings out and leapt over the cliffside, soaring out into the gorge. The sheriff and lawman quickly crouched behind the boulder, guns drawn.

The bird landed on a flat strip of rock about halfway down the gorge, still without his weapons drawn. “Howdy, mister!” The red dragon’s eyes snapped open, his body unmoving as his gaze focused on the gunslinger.

“You dare rouse me from my rest?” the great beast spoke in a melodious, yet mighty voice, “Who are you that is so foolish to anger me?”

“Oh, ‘scuse me mister, but I’ve heard some nasty things...like that yer’ about to burn that little town down yonder to ash?”

“Indeed I am,” the dragon retorted, “My domain is mine to play with. Your point?”

“Ah. That’s a damn shame, ‘cause I take offense to that, sir.”

“Oh?” the dragon rose, his head quickly moving to rise on par with the koutu’s ground. “And just what are you planning on doing about this, you who are so small and weak?”

“Well for starters, Plan A is askin’ ya nicely to reconsider.”

The dragon let out a booming laugh. “Gahahahaha! Pathetic! No, you will not be asking anything of me. This withering husk of life will be purified by my most sacred flames. I shall not be persuaded.”

The koutu shrugged. “Worth a shot. Looks like I’ll just have to stop you myself then.”

The dragon’s grin grew manic. “I would like to see you try. Go on. Raise your arm to strike. I will cut you down in a moment.”

The bird smirked before letting out a sharp whistle. The dragon looked confused for a moment before realization hit him...in the form of a stick of dynamite.

Hurled from over the cliffside, it smacked into the dragon’s head before exploding in a spectacular fashion.

“Damn perfect throw, officer!” the koutu yelled before reeling back and letting a bolt of magic loose. The glowing blue spear flew forward, piercing the beast that still reeled from the explosion.

Michaels’ eyes went wide. “He’s a sorcerer!” he cried out to the sheriff, “No wonder he was so damn cocky!”

“Shit,” Red mumbled, “Maybe I was wrong about all this.”

The beast roared out in fury, eyes burning as they honed in on the now flying koutu.

“YOU WILL BURN AWAY FOR THIS, FOOLISH MORTAL!”

Mood Music

“Yer’ outgunned, friend!” the koutu shot back, whirling to the side as a plume of flames erupted from the dragon’s maw. Using his momentum, the stranger spun around mid-flight and took out his revolver, fanning the hammer and emptying all six shots into the beast.

The two humans noted a strange blue tinge of air that enveloped the bullets as they flew through the air, becoming plumes of magic that dissipated around the scales where the bullets landed.

“Enchanted bullets too!” Michaels shouted, “We can do this, sir!”

Red’s eyes narrowed. “Cover him!” the Sheriff began firing off rounds from his revolver at the dragon, while Michaels did the same.

Shell casings hit the ground alongside the stranger, who quickly reloaded his revolver as the dragon snarled, coming to a sudden pause. The beast felt the bullets from the pair up above hit him in the back.

The dragon whirled around, letting out a roar and glaring at the sheriff and white hat…

But before he could go after them, the koutu held up a taloned hand, before bringing it down. A bolt of divine lightning descended from the sky, striking the beast and making it cry out in pain.

Huffing, the dragon slowly turned his head to see the stranger, hand glowing and pulsing with magic as his other hand held his revolver aimed at the behemoth.

There was a moment of silence as everyone took in what just happened.

“Y-you…” the beast spoke softly, a hint of concern in his voice.

“I’m right here, huckleberry!” the koutu shouted, firing off another round and striking the beast’s head.

The red dragon let out another roar, recovering from the blast before flying out towards the koutu, who leapt off the cliffside he stood on and began flying along the gorge.

The two humans’ eyes were wide as dinner plates. Michaels looked over to Red.

“Well shoot, sir! He ain’t no sorcerer...he’s a goddamn paladin!”

The sheriff shook his head. “Crazy bastard...no wonder! Well it’s about damn time we got some proper help around here!”

Michaels frowned. “This shooter ain’t doin’ it. I need more kick.” the lawman tucked his pistol away and reached for the rifle on his back. Unslinging the lever-action repeater into his hands, the officer closed an eye and took careful aim.

A steady barrage of gunshots rang out as Michaels started firing and cocking the lever of the repeater, while Red kept firing his revolver.

The dragon, furious by this point, ignored the pain of the volleys of bullets hitting his back and went flying after the koutu, eyes near slits.

With another roar, the dragon let forth a jet of flames from his maw, the koutu whirling to the side as the fire flew past where he had been just a moment ago.

The sudden spike in temperature made the paladin wince. “Hoo! That’s hot!”

“You will wish that was as hot is it gets when I am through with you, bird!” the dragon barked back, spinning through the air himself as he moved to the stranger’s side.

The speed and agility of the dragon caught the koutu by surprise. Just a moment ago he seemed so clumsy and lumbering, but the dragons were the rulers of the sky…

With a crack of his tail, the koutu was slammed into with murderous force, sent rocketing to the cliffside and slamming into it. He hit the rocks so hard he left a small crater...but the paladin groaned, and grabbed at the sides of the man-sized crater.

He had thrown up a ward at the exact moment the dragon’s tail shifted. If he had been just a fraction of a second slower…

“Holy land of God, he’s alive!” Red cried, both of the humans staring slack-jawed as the bird pulled himself forward and onto the ground. Even the dragon seemed to reel back from the koutu’s survival, unintentionally showing his own fear.

“B-but you...I…”

The stranger snarled at the dragon, hand already pulsing with magical energy.

“I’m gonna put you in a world of hurt, amigo.”

The bird reeled back and the magic changed, blue lights shifting into the likeness of a javelin. He heaved the javelin forward and let it go with all his might, magical weapon flying through the air and straight into the dragon's chest.

The beast roared and snarled as the holy javelin pierced him, quickly fading away into nothing. The stranger followed up with another bolt of lightning, and then began firing off shots as he leapt back into the air and began flying back towards the humans.

“Graaaaah...it is nothing! Your fortune cannot last! I WILL BURY YOU!”

 The koutu huffed as he twirled through the air, occasionally popping off shots at the dragon. They only cause minor injury, but they were certainly starting to pile up. The beast was grunting and growling with each movement, wincing as he adjusted his wings and moved his body.

All that punishment had certainly hurt him, only...there was quite a ways to go.

Narrowly avoiding a claw swipe then diving straight down to avoid a gust of flames, the paladin knew the dragon was right; his luck would run out eventually. If he just kept trying to whittle him down…

Have to think of something quick. Those humans, there has to be something they can do...

His eyes darted to the massive stone tunnel. It was enormous, enormous enough to fit even the dragon currently on his tail.

Wait...that’s it!

The koutu focused for a moment, eyes narrowing as he honed in on the white hat’s mind…

Hey, Michaels! You still got some dynamite?!

He could hear the bewildered response in his own mind. W-what?! What the hell?!

Yeah yeah, I’m talkin’ to your mind, I can do that! Now tell me, ya got that dynamite?

Wha-yeah, yeah I do! The hell you askin’ for, mister?!

I’ve got a plan, the birdman announced, I need some heavy explosives. How much you got?

There was a pause. W-well, I uhh...look, don’t tell Red about this, but I brought a couple crates. Hid em’ here ‘cause I thought we’d need em’. Right by that tree behind us. You plannin’ somethin’ big?

VERY big. That big ol’ archway, put those crates by the supports. You follow?

Michaels’ voice was ecstatic now. Ho boy, do I! On it!

The koutu continued evading the dragon and darting from left to right, dodging swings and fire breath all the while.

“FILTH!” the dragon roared, “YOU ARE FINISHED!”

“We’ll see about that!” the koutu hollered back, twirling through the air as he picked up more and more speed.

In the far distance, he could make out the two humans hurrying down a less steep incline to the bottom of the ravine, carrying a massive crate between the pair of them.

He kept up the pace. His initial skirmish with the dragon had caused them to fly pretty far from their initial starting point. Behind him, the dragon breathed fire and shouted further threats.

The two lawmen reached the stone arches and quickly got to work, burying bundles of dynamite along the foundations of the stone.

The gunslinger looked over his shoulder just in time to see the dragon breathe a plume of fire at him, diving and whirling to the right just in time. He could feel the scorching heat of the flames as they flew straight past him.

Further along, the humans seemed to be wrapping up their job, with dynamite scattered all throughout the bottom of the archway.

Alright, the white hat called to his mind, What’s our next move?

On my signal, light the fuse and run like hell…

The koutu dove lower, increasing his velocity as he dropped from the sky to only just flying above the river. The dragon remained in pursuit as they approached the stone archway…

Now that he was closer, he could see the pair shouting at each other, waving their hands wildly.

There was little doubt in the koutu’s head that they were arguing over the plan. Red likely started yelling about how crazy it was after Michaels told him.

“Come on...don’t let me down now…” the paladin muttered as he flew closer, the water underneath him nearly touching him as he struggled to keep his momentum.

Continuing to rocket forward with the dragon hot on his tail, he narrowed his eyes, judging the distance between himself and the others, along with the speed he was moving. If he just made it a little closer…

NOW! He shouted in his head, sending the order to the lawman.

In a moment, he saw the pair of humans bolt up the path they came running down, with lit fuses on the piles of dynamite signaling the impending explosion…

The koutu noticed a shift in the winds behind him. He turned and saw, much to his shock, the dragon slowing down, a noticeable amount of concern written on the creature’s face.

It knew what he was trying to do.

“What’s the matter, scared?!” the bird called back, “You yellow-bellied coward!”

As he turned his attention back in front of him, he noticed the sound of wildly flapping wings and deep snarl. It was now doubling its efforts to catch him.

Perhaps it was arrogance. Perhaps it was blind fury. Perhaps the dragon simply thought it could catch him before they reached the craggy rocks up ahead. Either way, it was now gaining on him, trying desperately to get him.

The gunslinger could feel his heart pounding against his chest now. He was in between a furious, rampaging dragon and a pile of lit dynamite that could blast him to pieces...and both were closing in on him.

As he reached the arches, he could practically feel the dragon on his back...and below him, he could see the lit dynamite’s fuse was entirely gone.

The koutu winced, praying to God for just a second’s more time-

A deafening explosion signalled the end to his plan. Dipping through the archway and emerging out the other side, the stranger barely had enough time to think as the earth shook, more explosions triggered as they caught more dynamite in each blast, and the dragon behind him let out a howling roar of agony.

The koutu turned and saw a whole ton of solid rock collapsing, the unique natural landmark crashing down onto the distracted and pain-wracked dragon. The beast collapsed into the river, covered in rubble.

The two humans, having looped around along the top of the cliffside, slid down into the gorge. The koutu, meanwhile, landed on the ground beside the carnage.

Michaels let out a loud cheer, keeping a hand on his hat as he slid down to the koutu. “Hoo-wee! You did it! I can’t believe you did it! That was a helluva stunt there, partner!”

Red reached the bottom after him, shaking his head. “Goddamn. I thought you were roast turkey, friend.”

The stranger shrugged. “I’ve had worse.”

Before either of them could answer, another voice made itself known.

The low, pained cry of a dragon.

The trio turned to look at the beast. It lay half-buried in the rubble of the stone that once stood tall above the river. Only the front half of the dragon was visible through the ruins. With claws outstretched towards the group, and an expression of suffering written on its face which was half submerged in the river, there was no doubting this creature was badly hurt, if not close to death.

“A-aaahhh...o-oh, my…”

Micheals quickly took his revolver out of his holster and took aim. “Ain’t so tough now, are ya, partner?”

Red followed suit, walking up and aiming his revolver at the eyes of the beast. “What’s that I heard about scorching my town?”

The dragon let out a groan. “No...not yet...not like this…”

The koutu put his hands on his hips and gave the beast a serious look. “It’s over, amigo. Yer finished.”

The dragon’s eyes widened in horror. “It cannot be...no...NO! You must not!”

The paladin shook his head. “Gimme one good reason.”

The beast, to his surprise, remained silent. The koutu raised a brow.

“No promises of riches? No artifacts? No blusterin’ threats?”

“I...I have no hoard, no fortune. I have nothing. Nothing of my own, and nothing to give, a-and…” the beast’s eyes grew hazy and distant. “F-feels...cold…”

The koutu’s eyes shot open as he realized it. This beast was dying.

The explosions had done more damage than he had thought, and with all the rubble he couldn’t even check.

The humans behind him coldly stared at the monster in silence, guns still aimed at him. They seemed to believe this might have been a trick.

The paladin turned back to the dragon, a promising, yet risky and optimistic idea in his mind.

“I can save ya.”

“What?!”

That word had been uttered by both the dragon and the humans.

“Yeah. If you want.”

“The hell are ya doin’?!” Red demanded, glaring at the birdman.

“Y-you would...do that?” the red dragon asked. Both surprise and hope were apparent in his desperate speech.

“Suuure...but this is conditional, ya hear? You gotta make me a promise.”

“Anything!” the beast cried. Apparently once his delusions of invincibility were shattered, this dragon realized just how much life he had left to live, and was willing to do what other dragons might not to preserve it.

The koutu crouched down next to the dragon and stared straight into its large, reptilian eye. “In exchange for your life, I want you to do a complete 180, ya hear?”

The beast stared back at him, but his eye was unfocused and clouded. “What...do you mean?”

“From here on out, this ‘domain’ is not yours to ‘play with’...but to protect.”

A sharp hiss rang out as the dragon attempted to move its body among the rubble. “Y-you mean…”

“That’s right. You keep an eye out on this town. You come runnin’ when they holler for yer help. You help out the law with criminals on the run, keep the town safe. Hell, maybe you should help em’ out with gatherin’ and huntin’ too!”

Michaels sighed and rubbed his eyes. “Look, that’s a mighty nice thing you’re tryin’ to do here pal, but I don’t think he’ll-”

“Yes...I will do it...”

The lawman tilted his head. “Wha-”

The koutu smirked, craning his neck towards the dragon. “What was that, mister? I didn’t quite hear that...”

“I agree!” the red beast said hurriedly.

“Swear on it.”

“I swear on my life, my honor, and all I hold most dear!” the dragon cried, “Please...my vision grows dark…”

The koutu grimaced. “This is gonna take a lot outta me, partner. You PROMISE yer gonna keep up yer end of the bargain?”

The beast began to twitch. “P-please...I beseech thee…”

Realizing he had to do this right now if he wanted the dragon to live, the paladin kneeled beside the beast and placed his hands upon the larger creature.

Closing his eyes, the paladin willed all the energy within his body to move into the dragon, muttering quietly in prayer as the divine aided him.

The two humans viewed this scene with a healthy amount of skepticism, backing up and keeping their weapons at the ready.

“Lord, this is crazy,” Red muttered.

“Who knows?” Michaels said with a shrug, “Maybe it’ll work.”

After over a minute of praying and utilizing his holy magic, the paladin at last stopped, his body spent from the taxing effort of healing this great beast.

He rose to his feet, wobbling for a moment before going for a pack on his belt. He took out a sleepskip potion and quickly began to guzzle it down.

The dragon, in the meantime, began to blink. Its head rose and it looked around the area with a vested interest.

The koutu sighed as he screwed the top back onto the potion and stuffed it back into his pouch. “What are ya starin’ at, partner?”

“Hmm...my vision has returned, in perfect clarity.”

“Good! So...feel better?”

“...I feel perfect.”

The dragon followed this up with a surge upwards, bursting out of the rubble with seemingly no effort. He flapped his wings and rose above the debris and ruin, circling around and landing in the gorge beside the koutu.

With the huge beast staring down at him with an unreadable expression, the paladin worried he might have simply just gotten tricked. He tensed up, ready to act, when the dragon spoke.

“You saved my life. For what reason, I am unsure. You have no reason to trust me. I am a threat. I am your enemy...and yet, you showed me kindness anyway.”

The koutu shrugged, a false grin plastered on his beak. “Figured I could take you if you turned out to be lying.”

“...you are a poor liar. But it is obvious that is not your trade. No, you follow the old ways. Those tenets of honor and chivalry, a sacred warrior code forged in the crucible of your precious church.”

The koutu let out a laugh. “Aww, what gave it away?”

“At any rate...I am in your debt, and as such, I will uphold our bargain. For this second chance, I, Astronomus, hereby proclaim myself as the Guardian of Pike’s Creek, home to those venerable warriors that showed me mercy when I needed it most.”

The koutu nodded. “That’s good to hear...cause we’ve got yer first mission ready, friend.”

Astronomus seemed genuinely surprised. “Already? Did you offer me this deal because you had a use for me to begin with?”

“Dead on.”

Astronomus’ eyes narrowed. “Very clever...very well, what is it?”

…

Gunshots rang out all around the town as the bandits continued their advance. Each time they attacked, the town posse was pushed back. Each time the citizens attempted a counter attack, they lost people. They now settled for giving ground rather than risking more lives.

Deputy Harry loaded yet another six rounds into his revolver, sitting behind a fence as cover. He had lost his rifle when the bandits blasted his cover with dynamite further up the street. Like all the other lawmen, he had a hat, vest, and a shiny badge identifying him.

A few others were spread out along the street, hiding behind various bits of cover as both they and the bandits popped off shots at each other.

Things were getting desperate now. A few of the men that joined up to fight had run out of ammo, and were sent back to the sheriff’s to get more. A couple had been killed, and two had been shot.

Harry grimaced as he shot a bandit and watched him go down. There were too many. Things were getting desperate…

A man rounded the corner and tackled him, sending both of them to the ground. Just as the bandit rose to a kneeling position and aimed his gun at the deputy, a loud bang made him freeze.

The man collapsed on top of the deputy, who quickly threw him aside and looked out to the road.

A woman in a simple dress, holding a rifle, nodded at him. This was Alice, the local cook’s daughter.

Things were bad, and they needed every hand they had…

“Thanks!” Harry called out as he got back up and pressed himself up against the fence. He steadied his balance, taking a deep breath and reading himself for the next attack…

With a bellowing cry, the entire group of bandits charged forward, aiming to overwhelm the defenders in a blind rush. Crowds of men stormed down the street, closing the distance with exceptional speed.

It took a moment for it to sink into Harry’s head: No matter how much they shot, they wouldn’t take enough of them down before they were overrun.

Gritting his teeth, Harry cried out. “Everyone, fall back! I’ll cover you!”

He only fired two shots before an earth-shaking roar made everyone taking part in the battle freeze.

That roar came from behind him, and after the scare this morning, that could only mean one thing…

Slowly, he turned and looked up, and within the sky, the source of his fears approached. A massive beast of red scales and sharp eyes, wings blocking out the sun with their sheer size, and an imposing visage of a legendary creature.

The dragon had arrived.

Harry let his shoulders slump and his head lower. It had kept its promise; it was here to burn Pike’s Creek to cinders and kill everyone inside.

The town’s done for...but maybe I can get a few folks out…

Steeling himself, Harry took a few sharp breaths and held his revolver in a vice-grip, hands shaking.

Before he could even call out for everyone to follow him, a bewildering sight caught the breath in his throat.

A birdman in gunslinger garb stood up on top of the dragon and leapt into the air, doing a backflip before catching the wind and flying forward towards the group. 

The dragon passed the town posse and stopped in front of the charging bandits, giving them only a moment to scream before he let out a plume of flames from his maw.

The jet of fire poured down onto the crowd of bandits, charring them to bits in a mere second. There was some comfort in the lack of screams; at least the usually agonizing way to die was quick with dragonfire.

The dragon then landed among the buildings along the main town road, only having barely enough room to do so. In a moment that only furthered his shock, Harry watched Sheriff Red and Officer Michaels slide down the beast’s back and onto the ground.

“What in the goddamn…?”

“Heya, deputy!” Michaels shouted cheerfully, a lever-action rifle resting on his shoulder.

“The hell is goin’ on?!” Harry shouted, confused.

“We made a new friend,” Red explained, pointing a thumb over his back, “Not this one, another one who talked him into...helping out.”

“Helping out…?” “This fella’s turned his way around, ain’t that right, pal?!” Michaels called out, turning around.

The dragon frowned and lowered his head. “Indeed. I am Astronomus, and I am here to aid you. In exchange for mercy at the hands of these victors, I have sworn to become the Guardian of Pike’s Creek. I will drive these rabble out.

Michaels pointed at the building beside them. “Err, hey, Astronomus…”

The tavern had been hit by the flames as well, part of the wall currently covered in flames that licked at the chipping paint along the welcome sign.

The dragon performed what Harry could only imagine was an embarrassed grin before flapping his wing at it, the whipping winds snuffing out the flames.

The deputy watched as the koutu in the distance twirled through the air and fired a few shots at what he presumed were fleeing bandits.

“Who wants some lead in they ear?!” the bird cried out faintly, “Step on up!”

Harry took off his hat and gave Red an exasperated look. “You got some weird help around here, sheriff.”

…

“...and that’s it.”

Red gave the bird a grin. The pair were overlooking Pike’s Creek from a hill on the northern side of town. The sun was beginning to set, the sky bathing the town in a vibrant hue of orange.

After the fight concluded, folks had began to clean up. The dragon was busy helping out and adjusting to its new role as protector rather than destroyer. With everyone else busy, Red decided to humor the stranger’s request to see him off.

“So all your affairs are settled,” the koutu noted.

“That’s right, and it’s all thanks to you, stranger.”

“Eh, I lucked out. If my gamble with the dragon backfired…”

“It didn’t, and that’s all I care about. You saved our bacon out there.”

The koutu shrugged. “It’s what I do.”

The sheriff turned his attention from the sunset to the stranger. “So, if you don’t mind me asking...who in the hell are you, son? You did some amazing things out there, with that there holy magic.”

“Perhaps this ain’t the sorta thing to admit to a man of the law, but...I’m a vigilante out for blood.”

The sheer, stark honestly of that statement made the sheriff’s eyes go wide. “Eh?”

The koutu nodded. “It’s true.”

The dragon said he’s a terrible liar…

Red cleared his throat. “Well, then...what in the blazes are you doing?”

The koutu gazed into the setting sun, expression turning sullen. “It goes back a long way. See, back in my hometown, there was this...bully. He liked to torment us other kids, got a real kick out of it.”

Red seemed skeptical. “Okay…”

The koutu’s eyes narrowed. “But then he beat my little brother with a rock.”

“Ah, blazes…”

“I beat the stuffing out of em’,” the koutu admitted, “I beat him so bad he threw up and couldn’t move til’ a grown up found him some time later.”

“So that’s gotta do with yer’ blood feud?”

“Yeah. You see...that kid...he didn’t make it.”

“Holy hell…”

The stranger shook his head. “My little brother nearly didn’t, either. If I hadn’t stopped him…”

“I understand,” Red said quietly, “I get it. It’s fucked up, but I get it.”

The koutu slowly nodded. “Yeah. It is.”

There was a brief moment of silence between the pair before the koutu gathered himself and continued.

“Well, his paw didn’t like that very much. Came to my house and stabbed MY paw. Thankfully some fine folks were walkin’ by and saw the whole thing. Paw pulled through, he skipped town when he realized he was gonna be thrown in jail, and life moved on.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Joined the church, they realized I had a knack for the whole magic thing, so I joined up with the clerics. Ascended to paladin not too long ago.”

“Impressive,” Red said with a nod.

“Well, I tried to move on. You do things you don’t mean sometimes, you know? I wish things had turned out differently, but all you can do is try to make up for it, go onto a better path. Ya know?”

Red nodded. “I gotcha...but you don’t seem at all like a man out fer blood.”

“I wouldn’t be normally, but something happened recently. Came home and found my brother out like a light on the floor. The folks were out of town...and my sis was missing. On her bed, I found a note taunting me, about how vengeance was finally his...and it was signed with that man’s initials.”

The sheriff reeled from the information. “He came back after all those years to hurt ya?”

The bird nodded, eyes locked on the ground. “Guess he was planning to settle the score while everyone else was tryin’ to forget…”

“My God…”

“Well, I started tracking him, he left a pretty obvious trail on the way out. I started out on the roads, and began to notice that I thought I had a pretty good idea where he was going. I came to Geralthin, was passing through here, and, well...here I am.”

“You gotta rescue yer sis, and you wasted all this time helping a couple of fools out?!”

“It’s what I do,” the koutu said, more quietly than the first time.

“Aw, hell, pal...you didn’t need to do this. You’ve got more important stuff to worry about.”

“I told you already, I’m not a man to leave others out in the dark. I know what it feels like to be helpless, to lose what you care about. I ain’t about to watch that happen to Lord knows how many folks.

“...you’re a good man. I apologize for the tongue lashin’ back when we met.”

“Don’t worry about it,” the koutu assured, “All water under the bridge. Now I’ve gotta get goin’, but first…”

The gunslinger reached into the pouches on his belt and began to rummage through.

“I’d like ya to have this.”

The bird pulled out a large rock, decorated with strange runes, the indents along the design were glowing a dim blue. He held it out to the sheriff.

“A...a rock?” Red questioned, taking it and inspecting the surface.

“Wrong. An anchor, partner. The second half to this.”

The bird pulled out another rock with similar designs and a blue glow, but this one was much smaller, and shaped to be easily held in a fist, unlike the large, disklike stone he had offered.

“Anchor? You mean that fancy magic that holds stuff?”

“Not exactly. This is the anchor half of a spell, not the anchor spell itself. That’s part of the teleportation ritual. Ya see, that’s what teleports, and this here rock in my hand tells it what to teleport.”

“You mean…”

The koutu grinned. “Yup! You just put that rock on the ground and say the magic word, and I’ll be alerted from my half of it. I should come runnin’ unless I’m doin’ somethin’ REAL important.”

Red was in disbelief. “Y-ya mean you’ll help us out of ANOTHER fix?!”

“If it comes to it, yeah. I’m really startin’ to like you fellas, and yer fine little town. If you need help, or if you just wanna see me, by all means, call me over!”

“Aw hell, you’re really somethin’, ya know that mister?”

The koutu answered by quickly wrapping his wings around the man in a hug. The human was shocked by the sudden display of affection, unsure how to respond.

“Resolve,” the bird whispered, beak beside his ear.

“Eh...what?”

The paladin pulled back and winked. “The magic word. Just call it out when you want to and the magic in that stone’ll spring to life.

“Oh! I gotcha. Jeez...you caught me off guard, there.”

“You know how it is,” the koutu admitted, “Dunno when I’ll see ya next, so might as well put my cards on the table. I think you folks are swell, and I hope the best fer ya all!”

“You too, mister!”

The koutu stretched his arms. “Eyup...well, I really should be going, now. Baddies are awaitin’!”

As he took a step forward, Red held an arm out. “Wait a second!”

The koutu stopped and turned back. “Yeah?”

“You never told me, stranger!”

The bird raised a brow. “Told ya what now?”

“You said if you lived you’d tell me yer name!”

The koutu’s eyes lit up. “Ah, right! Well...call me...Razorwing!”

Red blinked. “Yer...Razorwing?”

“That’s right! Now...see ya around, sheriff!”

The stranger leapt into the air and unfurled his wings, catching the wind and soaring off into the sky. In his wake, he left a conflicted and confused sheriff.

…

“Yeah, it’s right here.”

Michaels led Red further into the library. When the sheriff told the lawman what the bird had told him, Michaels got a funny look in his eye.

He claimed he knew something about “Razorwing”.

Now Red watched as Michaels pulled a book off of the shelves, holding it up to the sheriff’s face.

Two things really caught the man’s attention. Firstly, the picture.

The cover had a lovingly crafted illustration of a koutu with a striking white head and a brown body. He wore flowing, white robes with a short, vibrant red cape and had a quiver on his hip. In his hands he held a longbow, aiming it up and striking a heroic pose worthy of a statue.

The second was the title of the book: “The Adventures of Razorwing”.

Red blinked. “W-what in the hell?”

“Yeah,” Michaels said, “That’s Razorwing.”

“B-but he’s lookin like some man from the dark ages!”

“Close,” the officer said with a smile, “He’s from the Middle Ages, about 1350. He was a big celebrity in his day, and his fame only increased after a couple generations. He was an archer that went on all sorts of adventures. Fightin’ monsters, stoppin’ bad guys, savin’ everyone...a real man of honor. Did you know he could shoot so straight he could shoot a man twice and split the first arrow?”

“You know an awful lot about this bird fella.”

Michaels shrugged innocently. “Consider me a fan. Mama always read me storybooks about him when I was a kid.”

“He’s that popular, huh? Well, anyway...what does all this mean? I don’t get it,” Red admitted.

“That man that helped us out...think about it. He’s a warrior on a mission, a skilled and brave man out adventurin’ to stop bad guys. He’s a shooter with some special kick, and he shares his looks with a certain famous someone…”

“Ya mean...he took his name?”

“That’s right. He chose an old folk hero from his country he identified with...and he’s tryin’ to keep the torch lit. Least that’s what I think.”

The sheriff shook his head. “Two Razorwings...that’ll throw folks for a loop, don’t you think?”

Michaels laughed. “That’s only if he ever becomes famous.”

Red looked out a window beside him, gazing into the quickly darkening sky. “...I got a feeling he’ll make it through his journey. He’s something else.”

“True,” the lawman uttered quietly, “It’s like Razorwing always said...every age has its heroes.”

Tag list: @thereisnothingwrongwithbeingmad, @lady-redshield-writes, @paper-shield-and-wooden-sword, @sheralynnramsey, @tawnywrites, @writer-on-time, @oceanwriter, @zwergis-spilledink, @fluffpiggy, @elliewritesfantasy, @homesteadchronicles, @laurenwastestimewriting, @elaynab-writing, @the-ichor-of-ruination, @candy687, @fierywords, @shewrites-sometimes, @nerds-and-nebulae, @purpleshadows1989

[athena-athena]

Million Dollar Secret (Yondu x Reader)

A/N: I always struggle with naming fics, and I normally turn to song titles to try to find a name for them.  I put iTunes on shuffle to find a name for this one tonight, and Million Dollar Secret by Lucius popped up after a few tries.  It is perfect.  

The lyrics:

I've got a million dollar secret Can't tell you what it is, I'm keeping it to myself, I won't give it away

I've got a million dollar secret Hope I have the courage to keep it in Won't give in and just give it away

If you really wanna know, baby, come a little closer and I'll whisper in your ear Maybe I'll have forgotten what I was gonna say but Come a little closer, let me whisper in your ear anyway

You can ask over and over But I'm not ready to tell ‘Cause I have all your attention This feeling is suspended in air And I can keep it as long as I may need it Have all your attention as long as it's a mystery

I've got this million dollar secret I think it's best for now that I hold strong But maybe I'll share it at the end of this song

Tagged List:  @celticheart72 @misfitgirlwrites @animeaniseed (As always, just let me know if you’d like to be added/removed to/from my tagged list!  💙)

Warnings:  None.  Teensy bit of angst, but mostly fluff.  

Sitting in the mess hall after dinner, you listened to Yondu talking, while you absentmindedly swirled your glass of water around.  

“When me an’ tha boys were at tha bar last night, there was an asshole in there that jus’ would not shut ‘is stupid mouth.  Kept botherin’ tha waitress, an’ it was obvious she weren’t interested in ‘im. An’ I told ‘im ta leave her alone, an’ he got all smart an’ wanted ta start a fight. So I said to ‘im, if ya know what’s good fer ya, ya won’t take another step. An’ then he did, so I sent my arrow through ‘im.  He ain’t gonna be botherin’ nobody again… Are ya even listenin’ ta me?”

“What?”

“I said, are ya listenin’ ta me?”

“Of course, I am.”

"No, ya ain’t.  Ya ain't payin' a bit of attention ta what I'm tellin' ya."

"That's not true."

"Then what was I sayin'?"

"Um... y’all went to a bar last night.”

"That's all ya got outta all that?"

You crinkled your nose.  "Sorry."

"I don't understand why yer actin' like this. It ain't like ya ta ignore me. 'S'almost like yer in love or somethin'."

"What?"

His eyes widened in realization. "That's it, ain't it? Yer in love."

"Don't be ridiculous, Yondu!  Of course I'm not.  I'm just distracted, that's all."

"Now ya know ya can't lie ta me.  I can see right through ya, so ya might as well come clean."

"I'm not lying."

"Yer fiddlin' with yer hair. That's a sure sign ya ain't bein' completely honest. I know all yer tells."

"You do not!"

He grinned. "Yeah, I do. So who's tha lucky man?"

"I am not in love, so you can stop asking about it."

His grin widened, and he said, "Now yer playing with tha zipper on yer jacket.  ‘Nother giveaway that ya ain't bein' honest with me."

You dropped your zipper and placed your hands on the table in front of you to keep you from doing anything else to give you away.  

Yondu laughed.  “Lookit me.”

“No.”  You were determined to look anywhere other than him, and focused your attention on the control panel on the wall.

“Ya can’t, ‘cause ya know I’ll see right through yer lies if ya do.”

“That’s not true, I just don’t want to give you the satisfaction of doing what you say.”

He laughed again.  “C’mon, now.”  He cupped your chin in his hand and turned your head gently so you had no choice but to look at him.

“I ain’t gonna let this go, ya know.”

“Oh, believe me, I know.”

“Then ya might as well give up, an’ go on an’ admit it.”

You moved your chin out of his grasp.  “Why do you even care?”

“Well, first of all, I thought we’s friends, an’ second, I gotta right ta know what’s goin’ on with my crew members when they keep actin’ all distracted.  Tha last thing I need is fer ya ta be out on a mission an’ get distracted.”

“I’m not going to get distracted while I’m on a mission.  I know better than that.”

“But it’s okay ta ignore yer Cap’n, is it?”

“I thought we were just talking as friends, not as crew and Captain?”  You smirked.

“Think yer so clever.  What if I ordered ya ta tell me, as yer Cap’n?”

“You can’t order me to tell you something about my personal life.”

“Guess yer jus’ ashamed of whoever this fella is.”

You gave him a look.  “If I was in love, I wouldn’t be ashamed.  But I’m not in love.”

“Yer messin’ with yer hair again.”

“Oh, come on!”  You slammed your hands down on the table again.  

He chuckled.  

“I know ya almost as well as ya know yerself, an’ I know yer lyin’, an I ain’t givin’ up ‘til I know who yer in love with.  Could save us a lotta time if ya’d jus’ come clean now.  I ain’t gonna give ya a hard time.”

“You already are.”

“I mean I ain’t gonna give ya a hard time ‘bout whoever yer in love with.”

“If you knew me as well as you think you do, you’d already have your answer.”

“Oh, is that right?”

“Yes.”

“So yer admittin’ yer in love?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“Huh.  Well, it don’t matter if ya say it or not.  We both already know ya are.”

He leaned back in his chair, crossed his arms, and studied your face.

“Will you stop that?”

“I’m jus’ thinkin’.”

“Well, you don’t have to stare at me to think.”

“Ya been on this ship fer three years now, an’ this is tha first I’m noticin’ ya actin’ like this, so it can’t be nobody from Terra.”

“Will you please stop?”

“An’ ya don’t really spend much time by yerself off tha ship.”

“Stop trying to figure this out.”

“An’ ya ain’t never flirted with nobody at a bar or nothin’.”

“Yondu...”

“So it’s gotta be somebody on tha ship.  One a tha crew...”

“Just drop it, please.”

“Can’t believe ya’d be in love with one a tha crew.”

You rolled your eyes.  “I can’t believe you’re so interested in this.”

“Oh, I’m interested.  Wanna know who ‘xactly ya find attractive.”

“I honestly don’t know why you care, unless it’s just something to hold over my head.”

“Havin’ somethin’ on ya does sound nice.  Might get ya ta follow my orders fer once.”

“Shut up.”

He placed his elbows on the table, and leaned closer to you, still studying your face.

“That’s really getting annoying, you know.”

“Might as well get used ta it, ‘cause I ain’t stoppin’ ‘til I figure it out.”

Standing up, you said, “Well, I’m going to bed.  Good luck figuring it out.”

“Ya goin’ ta bed by yerself, or is yer mystery man gonna join ya?”

“Do not even think about spying outside my quarters, Yondu Udonta.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.  I’s jus’ askin’.”

“You are the worst.”

“’Night, darlin’.”

“Good night, Yondu.”

__

Later, as you were lying in bed, you thought back over the conversation you’d had with Yondu.  You could not believe he’d actually figured out what was going on with you.  He usually acted as though he was oblivious to things like that, but you knew he saw more than most people realized.  It was why you  should have known better than to let your guard down.  

You were paying attention to him, but you’d gotten distracted by his eyes and mouth as he talked, and you’d lost focus on what he was actually saying. And he was telling the truth – he would not let it go until he figured it out.  

You sighed, and rolled over.  You weren’t sure if he’d ever actually guess that he was the one you were in love with, but he’d eventually run out of Ravagers to consider.  The thought of Yondu trying to play matchmaker between you and one of the crew made you laugh to yourself.  Closing your eyes, you decided you’d worry about it later.

__

“So I’s thinkin’ ‘bout it after ya went ta bed last night, an’ I think I know who it is.”

“Good morning to you, too, Yondu.”  

“Yeah, yeah, mornin’.  Ain’t ya interested in who I think yer in love with?”

“Oh, yes, very interested.”  You picked up a plate, and started looking at your choices for breakfast.

“It’s Kraglin, ain’t it?”  

You looked at him, and realized he actually thought it was Kraglin.  He looked so proud of himself that you almost hated to tell him.  “No, it’s not Kraglin.”

“Ya sure?”

“Yeah, pretty sure.”  You picked up a muffin, placed it on your plate, and walked over to the tray covered in different pastries.  You were so thankful Cook had learned a few Terran recipes for you.  You’d spent the first few months of your time aboard the Eclector trying to find something you could manage to eat.  

“Not Kraglin, huh?”  He was standing with his hands on his hips, surveying the Ravagers already gathered in the mess hall for breakfast.

“Are you going to eat?”

“Wha’?  Oh, yeah.”  He picked up a plate and started piling things onto it without paying attention.  He was too focused on looking at his crew to even see what he was putting on his plate.

“Hungry this morning, are we?”

“Wha’?”

You raised a brow and looked at his plate.

He glanced at it, then looked back at you.  “Yeah, reckon I am.”

You laughed, selected your pastry, then set your plate down so you could pour yourself a cup of coffee.

“You do realize you’re ridiculous, right?”

“Whad’dya mean?”

“Trying to figure out who I’m in love with by examining your crew members in the mess hall?”

“I wouldn’t hafta worry ‘bout it if ya’d jus’ tell me.”

“Nope.”  You picked up your plate and headed to an empty table.

He joined you a couple of minutes later.  “Smart.”

“What’s smart?”

“You not sittin’ with nobody.  Might give me a clue.”

You shook your head and took a bite of your muffin.  Swallowing, you replied, “So ridiculous.”

“Gonna be headin’ out on a mission later this week.  Got any preference who I group ya with?”

“Nope.”

“A’right.  How ‘bout I put ya with Oblo?”

“That’s fine.”

“An’… Narblik.”

“Also fine.”

“What about…”  He glanced around the room again.  “Gef?”

“Whatever you want to do, Captain.”

“Ya ain’t gonna gimme no clues, are ya?”

“Nope.”  You grinned, then took another bite of your muffin.

“Ain’t a problem.  Yer gonna slip up one a these days, an’ I’m gonna figure out yer secret.”

You smiled sweetly at him.  “I’m sure you will.”

He sighed, and finally turned his attention to his plate.  He looked surprised at the amount of food he’d piled onto it.  “I ain’t gonna be able ta eat all this.”

Laughing, you replied, “I didn’t think so.”  

You finished the last of your coffee, then stood, and said, “Well, I’ve gotta get to work.  See you later, Sherlock.”

“What’s that supposed ta mean?”

You laughed.  “Nothing.  Enjoy your feast.”

__

You were on your way to your quarters later than evening, looking forward to a hot shower and a nice, relaxing evening with a book, when your wrist communicator beeped.  It was Yondu.  

“Hey, Yondu, what’s up?”

“Where are ya?”

“Heading to my room.  Why?”

“Meet me in tha common room.”

“Why?”

“Jus’ do it.”

“I was planning on taking a shower and then catching up on some reading..”

“Ya can still do that.  Jus’ wanna talk ta ya fer a while.”

“Is this another ploy to try to get me to tell you who I’m in love with?”

“’Course not!  Jus’ wanna see ya.”

“I saw you not that long ago.  What could you possibly have to say that you can’t say right now?”

“Ya sure yer gonna be alone, or -?”

“Don’t go there again, Yondu.  I swear, you’re not going to find me sneaking one of the crew members into my quarters.”

“So does he know yer in love with him?”

“No, he obviously does not.”

“How’re ya so sure?”

Because he’s spending his entire day trying to figure out who I’m in love with, instead of realizing it’s him.

“Because I haven’t told him.”

“I think he’d notice that ya had feelin’s fer him.”

“No, I really don’t think he would.”

“Ain’t too bright, huh?”

You laughed, hard.  “Oh, I wouldn’t say that.”

“Why’re ya laughin’?”

“No reason.”

“C’mon, meet me in tha common room.”

“Fine, I’ll be there in a few minutes.”

“Good.  See ya in a few.”

He disconnected before you could respond, and you sighed.  So much for a nice, relaxing evening with your book.

__

You walked into the common room to see Yondu deep in thought.  “Hey, Yondu.”

He jerked his head in your direction at the sound of your voice. “Oh, hey, Y/N.”

Sitting next to him on the couch, you asked, “You still trying to figure out who I’m in love with?”

“Somethin’ like that.”

“So what did you want to tell me?”

“Wha’?”

“You made me walk all the way over here from my quarters because you wanted to talk to me, and you couldn’t say it over the communicator.”

“I jus’ wanted ta see ya.”

“You’re kidding, right?”

“Nah, I did.”

“You know I’m not going to accidentally slip up and tell you who I love, right?”

“Yeah, I know.  I ain’t gonna bug ya ‘bout it tonight.”

“Are you sick?”  You looked at him in concern, and placed the back of your hand against his forehead.

“Very funny.  Nah, I ain’t sick.”

“Then what’s wrong?”

“Nothin’.”

“Something is wrong,  This is not normal Yondu Udonta behavior.”

He finally looked at you.  “I don’t like it.”

Your brows constricted in confusion.  “Don’t like what?”

“Tha thought of ya in love with somebody on tha ship.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Ain’t none of ‘em can treat ya right.”

“Are you serious?”

“Dead serious.”

“Yondu… what brought this on?  You were all into figuring it out earlier today, and now you don’t want me in love with anybody?”

“Jus’ been’ doin’ some thinkin’, that’s all.”

“About what?”

“Nothin’.”

“Okay, you’re the one who wanted me to come down here and talk to you, so you’re going to talk.  What happened?”

“I said it’s nothin’.  I jus’ don’t wanna see ya with any a tha clowns on this ship.”

He crossed his arms and leaned back on the couch, a scowl on his face.

“I don’t see why you care who it is...”

He looked at you then, and said, “I care ‘cause I can’t stand tha thought a seein’ ya with another man!”  

“What?”

“I don’t wanna hafta see ya hangin’ all over somebody, while I hafta jus’ sit back an’ act like I don’t care.”

“I don’t understand...”

“Jus’ ferget I said anythin’ ‘bout it.”  He stood up, and continued, “Sorry fer makin’ ya walk down here.  I’m goin’ ta bed.”

You grabbed his hand before he walked away.  “Oh, no, you’re not. You’re not leaving this room until we talk about this.”  You pulled him down beside you, and he sat with a huff.

“Look at me.”

He turned his ruby eyes on you, and you could see the pain in them. “What’s wrong, Yondu?”

He closed his eyes, and turned away from you again.  “It don’t matter.”

“Yeah, it does.  What happened today?”

He sighed, and sat in silence for a moment, before he said, “I been doin’ a lot a thinkin’ today...”

“Yeah, I know.  Trying to figure out who I’m in love with.”

“Yeah, that.  An’ the more I thought about it, the angrier I got.”

“Angry?”

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

He stood up, suddenly, and strode to the other side of the room, keeping his back to you.  “Dammit, ‘cause I’m in love with ya myself!  An’ I’d jus’ as soon kill any man that laid a hand on ya as ta look at ‘im.  An’ I wouldn’t be able ta do that, ‘cause then I’d be causin’ ya pain, and’ that’s tha last thing I wanna do.”

“Yondu...”

“No, lemme finish.  I know I’m tha one that was botherin’ ya by tryin’ ta get ya ta tell me, an’ I’s sorry ‘bout that, but I don’t wanna know.  Jus’ don’t tell me, an’ if I ever see ya with someone, I’ll jus’ pretend I didn’t see nothin’, an’ we can jus’ go on bein’ friends.”

“Yondu, please...”

“Unless ya don’t wanna be friends no more.  Then I guess I can jus’ be yer Cap’n.”

“I don’t want that, Yondu.”  You stood and walked to stand behind him, placing a hand on his back.  “I need to tell you something.”

You felt his back stiffen at your words, and he said, “I don’t wanna know who yer in love with now, a’right?”

“I think you need to know.”

He turned around to face you, and the sadness on his face almost made you cry.  “No, I don’t need ta know.  It’s tha last thing I wanna know.”

“You idiot.”

“Wha’?”

“You are such an idiot.  How can you realize I’m in love, and not realize you’re the one I’m in love with?  You’ve spent the last twenty-four hours trying to figure it out, and you never realized it was you?”

“If it was me, why didn’t ya jus’ say so?”

“Because I didn’t think you felt the same way.”

“I didn’t realize jus’ how much I loved ya ‘til I thought about ya with another man.”  He placed his hand on your hip.  “Ya sure ya ain’t jus’ sayin’ this ta make me feel better?”

“You really are an idiot, Yondu Udonta.”  You leaned up onto your tiptoes and kissed him.

His other arm snaked around your waist and pulled you closer to him, as you wrapped your arms around his neck.  

When you broke the kiss several minutes later, he grinned at you, and said, “I might be an idiot, but I’m yer idiot.”  

“Yes, you are.”  You returned his grin, then kissed him again.