#if someone said to me that they would check my mails after a month

[bean-pronounced-bawn]

I don't know why I keep expecting people to be able to do their jobs but I am always proven wrong and I'm mildly having a full meltdown rn because I need documents sent very far away literally by the end of the month and based on when they said 1) the documents would be shipped (1-5 business days) and 2) the documents would be notarized (7-10 business days) it should have been done at least a full week ago but it's not and the document hasn't even been shipped to the notarization place and because I have nothing else to do at work right now and nothing to keep me distracted like I've been trying to hard to do for the past week I'm having a panic attack about this and I know I've called and emailed a combined five times already about this but I'm gonna have to call again to see where they're at because I don't think I'll last the weekend without some kind of update if I'm already having a panic attack today

[iknityounot]

(Long post, sorry y'all)

A little more than two years ago now, my grandmother passed away. She and my grandpa had moved down to my home town a few years before so we could take care of them. I brought them groceries once a week, helped them write checks, fixed tvs, and found lost things. I was really close with my grandma.

In addition to her hilarious personality and dry wit, one of my favorite things about her was that she was a painter and a crafter like me! She used to crochet, and I took her to the craft store a couple of times so she could get more yarn and books on crochet. But her arthritis and the shaking in her hands kept getting worse, so she eventually had to stop.

She kept her most recent project, a granny square blanket, safely packed away in a plastic bin. She told all of us she was going to finish it one day.

Her hands never got better, and when she got sick, and we found out it was cancer, she rapidly deteriorated.

After she passed, I went to work helping my mom clean out my grandparents apartment so we could move my grandpa in with her. In our frantic cleaning, I found that bin again:

DOZENS of granny squares, dozens of half used skeins. I asked my mom what she wanted me to do with it, and she said she didn't care. I set it aside and later took it home.

Maybe a month later, that tumblr post about the Loose Ends Project was going around. It felt like a sign--I was never going to learn to crochet in order to finish my grandmother's blanket. But they might be able to help!

So I filled out the interest form. They got back to me SUPER quick. And maybe 2 weeks later, I was paired with volunteer in my state (only 2 hours away!) and the box of yarn, granny squares, and my grandmother's crochet hook were in the mail. That was at the end of January this year.

Over the next couple of months, my "finisher" emailed me regular updates on her progress, and asked me questions on my preferences for how she constructed the final blanket.

At the end of August, the blanket was done!

I had always intended the blanket to be a gift for my mother. So I cleaned it up, put it in the only bag I had big enough to fit it, and drove to my mom's. I gave the blanket to her and she was gobsmacked. I explained to her all about Loose Ends, and how someone volunteered to finish the piece for us. She was speechless. (I was quite pleased with this, because I am not the best at giving gifts, so this was a pretty exciting reaction!)

She said that it was the most thoughtful gift she had ever been given. She said "your grandma would love this". To which I replied, "yeah, I know she really wanted to finish it a couple of years ago". But that was when my mom dropped the bomb of a century on me--she told me that my grandma had started making those granny squares OVER 30 YEARS AGO. She had started the blanket when my grandpa was staying in the hospital, but that was back when my mom was younger than I am now! My grandma had packed them all away, planning on finishing it, when my grandpa was sent home from the hospital. Then it went from house to house, from condo in Chicago to their apartment in my hometown. All that time and my grandma had wanted to finish it, but couldn't. First because she was busy, then because she forgot how to do it, then because of her arthritis, and then because of the cancer. My mom said she had given up on expecting my grandma to finish it. 

She said I brought a piece of her childhood with her mom out of the past.

And really, all of this is to say, if you have seen or heard about the Loose Ends Project and have an uncompleted project or piece from a loved one who has passed away--these are your people. They were so kind and treated my project with such care. That box probably would have been found by my own grandkids one day if I hadn't heard about Loose Ends.

Five stars, absolutely worth it!

(From what I understand, you can sign up to volunteer too! If you have time to share, it might be worth checking out!)

[roosterforme]

Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw Part 9 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Bradley never felt like this before in his life. As soon as he spent a few minutes in your presence, he needed to keep coming back for more. Your touch and your voice were already making this homecoming something he was hoping to repeat, and he decided to keep pressing his luck.

Warnings: Fluff, angst, language, Bradley getting handsy

Length: 4100 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female teacher!Reader

Check out my masterlist for more! Yours Truly, Bradley Bradshaw masterlist

Bradley promised he would pick you up in an hour. That gave you essentially no time to get yourself ready to go out. At least you didn't have those typical first date jitters, because you and he had already taken the time to slowly get to know each other over the past few months. All of the emails from him that you'd archived into their own folder in your inbox felt precious now that he was home. Now that he surprised you at work. Knowing what he felt like and seeing the way he moved in person seemed to be the only missing pieces, and now everything fit perfectly in your mind when it came to Bradley Bradshaw. 

While you weren't nervous about getting to know someone new, you were a little antsy about trying to make yourself look as nice as you could in an hour. After you'd worked all day. For your first date with a man you already couldn't get enough of. He reminded you that he wanted to take you to the beach, as if you could forget the splendid details he'd divulged over the phone a month ago.

He told you he was going to wear jeans, nothing fancy, but when you looked in your closet, everything seemed tragically terrible. You could practically feel time ticking away as you yanked a simple sundress from its hanger and pulled it on over your cute underwear set. Not that he was going to see that tonight, but it made you feel good regardless. It also made your skin feel flushed as you thought about the photo you'd sent him where you'd gone topless under your bedding, and you squeaked when you heard knocking on your door. 

When you pulled it open, he was there, like a dream. Earlier in your classroom, when he interacted with your students, it felt like you had imagined the whole thing. But nothing felt as real as the warmth in his voice when he softly said, "Hey, Gorgeous," as he filled your doorway with his broad shoulders.

"Hi, Handsome," you replied, even as he leaned in closer until your lips were met with a kiss as sweet as the ones he treated you to earlier. He seemed to be taking your desire to be kissed as soon as he saw you to heart. Either that or he just couldn't help himself, and you were more than okay with either scenario. 

Your fingers ghosted along the buttons of the loud tropical print shirt he was wearing. The fabric was soft as he deepened the kiss enough to let you feel his rough mustache against your skin before pulling away. All of the teasing kisses from a few hours ago made you want to pull him inside toward your couch, but he was already reaching for your hand.

He looked a little tired, and once again you got butterflies knowing he wanted to spend his first evening home from a very long deployment with you. As he smiled and wrapped his big hand around yours, he asked, "You ready for me to show you why deleting that dating app was the best decision you'll make all year?"

Your lips parted in soft surprise at his confidence and his little smirk. Granted, so far, he had no reason to behave otherwise. You let him guide you outside, and you locked your door as you said, "I thought getting my students to send mail to a deployed Naval aviator was my best decision?"

He hummed softly. "Seems as though you can do no wrong."

It was like floating on a cloud, having his attention and gaze fixed on you. How in the world this man wasn't already locked down was mystifying. As his rough thumb trailed back and forth across your knuckles, the butterflies started up again in a big way. It was actually happening. The first date that you'd been daydreaming about on repeat was here. He was following through with it, and now you were expected to act normal.

When he unlocked the door and helped you climb up into his insanely cool truck, he said, "It looks like you can't stop smiling, which is great, because it's a beautiful smile."

You laughed softly and covered your eyes before groaning softly. "I'm just still kind of in shock." You peeked at him from between your fingers. "When I woke up this morning, I was convinced something terrible had happened to you... or that you ghosted me."

Bradley looked truly concerned as he coaxed your hands away from your face and said, "Baby, you thought I ghosted you?"

You gave him a little shrug and said, "The thought crossed my mind. I know you said sometimes they shut off communication from the aircraft carrier when-"

He silenced you with his lips on yours, cupping your cheek with his big hand before breaking away to say, "I've been thinking about you since I unfolded the first letter you sent. And I've been thinking about today since you gave me your personal email address. I'm not going anywhere, and I'm definitely not going to ghost you, Gorgeous." Just as you felt embarrassed for having admitted that much to him, he kissed you again and said, "I want to get you Thai food and take you to the beach. It only took me thirty-seven minutes to get here in traffic, and it should be even shorter now. Since we're going to be doing this drive with frequency, I want to learn the best times for it."

You made a soft sound as his thumb continued to stroke your cheek, and you nodded as you said, "Let's do it."

-----------------------------

Bradley laced his fingers with yours as he drove down along the coast back to Coronado. The time it took to get to your place was really no big deal to him, but he didn't want it to seem insurmountable to you. Traffic in San Diego could be a nightmare at times, especially in the evening, and he didn't want you to think he wasn't more than willing to do this. Especially after you thought he may have ghosted you. And especially since he was planning on asking you to be his girlfriend. 

You and your students got him through his deployment in a way nothing else ever quite had before. Your letters and emails were informative, funny and thoughtful, and you had this addictively subtle way of always letting him know he was on your mind. After months with Vanessa, all he got was a bad attitude, a partner who clearly wasn't invested, and an email about a water bottle. 

You were singing along to a song he happened to love when he chuckled to himself as he changed lanes. "What's so funny?" you asked, giving his hand a little squeeze. "My singing voice isn't that bad."

"Your singing voice isn't even slightly bad," he replied easily, glancing at your face in profile as you smiled. "I was just thinking about my ex-girlfriend."

"Oh," you said as your smile vanished, and your hold on his hand loosened. 

"Shit," he grunted. "Not like that," he promised, tugging on you gently while trying to focus on the road. "You and I had exchanged more emails halfway through my deployment than Vanessa and I did in seven months. And I'm hoping you'll keep emailing with me on occasion, even though we can text and talk on the phone right now, too. I associate my inbox with you now."

"Vanessa?" you asked, avoiding the rest of his statement. "Isn't that the name of Jayden's dog?"

Bradley nodded. "It sure is," he replied with a laugh. "One of the reasons I always liked his notes the best."

You were looking out your window now as the pretty coastline started to give way to a view of North Island across the bay. "I'll keep emailing you. How could I not? Texts and phone calls would be a bonus."

"I told you, you're going to get sick of me soon, Gorgeous. That's how many of my texts and phone calls you're about to be on the receiving end of." Bradley kissed your fingers as he turned to cross the bridge that led to Coronado, and he murmured, "Start thinking about what you want to eat for dinner. We're almost there."

He would erase all doubts about him from your mind. Your hand already felt like it belonged in his as you and he walked into the takeout restaurant while you listed off some of your Thai favorites. The two of you seemed to translate well from interacting through screens to physically being together, and the fact that he already wanted to put a label on this was a bit surprising to him. But there was still a lot he wanted to ask you about and tell you first, which was proving difficult when you looked up at him with bright eyes as a beautiful smile. He practically blurted out the world girlfriend as you told him you couldn't decide what you wanted to eat.

"What are you getting?" you asked. "I'm torn between Pad Thai, Yellow Curry and Tom Yum Goong."

"Let's get all three," he replied before kissing you. 

When he pulled away, your eyes were still closed as you asked, "All three? I can only finish one."

"Yeah, we can share them," he whispered, kissing you softly again. "My appetite is huge." When the person who was working at the counter had to clear their throat to keep Bradley from pulling you closer to his body like he had earlier in your classroom, he begrudgingly ordered not three, but four entrees while you laughed. 

"You weren't kidding," you mused as he paid for dinner.

"Listen," he told you as he put his credit card away. "There are three things I'm never going to joke about. Food is the first one. My mom always made me clean my plate, and I never outgrew that. If I'm willing to eat two servings of dinner from an aircraft carrier mess hall, then I'm probably going to eat at least that much if it's food that actually tastes good. And second, if I say there's a spider and that I need you to come quick, there is absolutely a spider that I need you to take care of for me." You laughed and bit your lip as he said, "And third, I'm never going to joke about how attracted I am to everything about you."

Bradley tried his best not to cause a scene in the small restaurant, but when you ran your fingers along the scars on his face and up into his hair, his hands found their way to your hips, and your body was snug against his. He didn't say another word, and you didn't either. Neither of you moved any closer for a kiss. You just brushed your fingers gently through his hair, occasionally tugging a little bit, and he thought he could lose his mind this way. With you smiling softly at him, silently and unknowingly showing him that your touch was uniquely something he'd been craving for so long.

"I'll take care of the spiders for you. Don't worry," you told him as you grinned.

"Baby, that's like dirty talk," he replied, his words making him think of that one photo you sent to him of you in bed. You dipped your head, trying to hide from him as you laughed, and he leaned in to kiss your jaw just as his name was called. "You ready for dinner?" he mumbled, knowing he was about five minutes away from his stomach growling loudly even though standing here with you was one of the nicest feelings in his recent memory.

"Let's get you fed," you told him, patting his firm stomach and accidentally snagging one of his belt loops with your finger. He had to bite the inside of his cheek against the growing need he felt for you as you reached out to grab the bag of food, and he followed you back out to his Bronco like a lost puppy.

----------------------------

After some debate about where you wanted to sit since the wind was starting to pick up, you chose a blanket on the sand over the back of his Bronco. You honestly weren't sure Bradley could even fit back there comfortably with you. He was so tall and broad, and his legs were so long, you'd practically have to be on top of him so he'd have room. Your mind wandered to the idea of him spilling off of his couch while you snuggled with him, and you could feel the warmth rising in your face as he helped you down onto the sandy asphalt of the parking lot.

With your hand in his, Bradley led you around to the back door where he pulled out a picnic blanket and a cooler. The wind picked up and you shivered a bit, wondering if he would let you curl up against his warm chest and his tropical shirt. 

"I brought this just in case," he told you, turning to reach back inside and grab a well worn, gray sweatshirt that said TOP GUN across the front. He held it up, and you nodded, and then Bradley pulled it over your head for you, his fingers skimming down your sides as you pushed your arms through the sleeves.

"Thanks," you murmured as the oversized garment kind of swallowed you up. It was so soft over your sundress, you couldn't imagine ever wanting to take it off. And the look Bradley was giving you as you stood before him in it warmed you up as much as the shirt itself.

"I like the way that looks," he said, voice a little raspy as the wind pushed at his wavy hair.

"Bradley."

He shook his head, brown eyes fixed on you. "And I like the way that sounds."

You didn't need to eat anything. You could be sustained on making out in the backseat. You thought about telling him as much when he groaned softly, handed you the beach blanket and picked up everything else. "If we don't get settled, we'll miss the sunset, and the food will be cold."

He pressed one hot and heavy kiss to your lips before nudging the door shut with his hip, and you scampered after his long-legged gait to catch up with him. When he asked you to pick a spot for the blanket, you spread it out near some tall dune grass, away from some of the other couples who seemed to have been lured out by the promise of a pretty sunset. And just as you predicted, Bradley sprawled himself out and took up most of the space, leaving you sitting right at his side.

You helped him open up the containers of food and the disposable utensils, and then you watched him reach into the cooler and hold up a bottle of Prosecco and a bottle of a local craft beer. You pointed to the Prosecco, and he opened it for you as you said, "I know you told me you don't have much family, but you mentioned your mom? And how she always made you clean your plate?" You couldn't help but be curious, especially since you'd already told him a bit about your own family through email.

"Yeah," he replied evenly as you took a sip of Prosecco right from the bottle when he didn't hand you a cup. It was sweet and cold, but you almost choked on it when he said, "She died years ago. So did my old man. He was in the Navy, too."

"Bradley," you gasped, sloshing some of the wine onto your fingers as you tried not to drop the bottle. "I'm so sorry." He just shrugged and waved you off, but you ended up with your arms around his neck and the cold bottle pressed to his back as you whispered, "Is that why you didn't really have anyone writing to you other than me and my class?"

His big hand found your lower back through the sweatshirt. "Baby, the only other person who ever writes to me is my best friend, and even that is pretty sporadic."

You pulled away a little bit to meet his eyes as you asked, "What about Vanessa? The human, not the dog."

Bradley laughed and said, "The dog would make a better pen pal than the human. Probably be nicer to me, too."

You were completely taken aback. "What's that supposed to mean?"

He kissed your cheek before getting you settled at his side again, and you watched him scoop some noodles onto his fork. "Means she's not like you. And I'm going to try my best to prove that I'm not like your ex boyfriend who didn't like it when you talked about your job. Shouldn't be hard since I already think your kids are so cool, and I probably read at about a fourth grade level."

"Bradley," you balked as you laughed that he remembered what you told him about your ex, but he was already holding the food out to you.

"Try this and tell me what you think." You took the fork from his hand, tasted the dinner and moaned in appreciation. "It's pretty great, right?"

"Oh my goodness," you told him, digging the fork into the container for more. "It's even better than the place by my school."

You tried the curry next as the sun just about hit the horizon, and Bradley casually said, "We can do this all the time. Or I can surprise you with dinner after work."

"It's not a surprise if you tell me that," you told him before taking another sip of the wine.

"You don't like surprises," he said with a smile, and you realized for the second time tonight that he probably remembered everything you ever told him. The butterflies were back in full force as you and he chatted while you shared the meal. It wasn't like a first date at all. It was like some highly romantic reunion where he kissed you with a bit more frequency as the food containers ended up empty and the sky turned purple.

He was so warm as you snuggled up against his chest with your head on his shoulder. As the first few stars appeared in the clear sky, his big hand came to rest on your thigh, his fingers dipping inside the hem of your dress as the breeze made you cuddle even closer to him. "Was your last mission dangerous?" you asked, remembering how apprehensive he looked and sounded over the FaceTime call.

When he didn't respond right away, you thought perhaps he didn't hear you, but he squeezed your thigh and cleared his throat. "All of them are, Gorgeous."

Your heart clenched. You had him here with you after months of wishing and dreaming. You didn't want to seem pushy by asking, but you couldn't help yourself. "I never thought about what it would be like to... be with someone who deploys for work. Not until we started talking. But now I think about it a lot." His soft grunt next to your ear had you quickly asking, "Is that what it would be like? Always worrying if you're okay? Always wondering if you miss me as much as I miss you?"

He took your breath away as he kissed you, parting your lips with his and tasting your tongue. His lips were sweet from the wine, and his nose bumped yours as his big hand slid around to the back of your thigh. All you could do was hold onto him as he treated you to kiss after toe-curling kiss. You shamelessly moaned his name when he finally let you take a breath, but then he was right back on you. Your fingernails scraped softly along his faded scars before digging into his hair, and he broke the kiss and held you to him.

"You would never have to worry about the last bit. I would make sure of that. But yeah, Baby, the rest of it would kind of suck."

The only thing you could say was, "Bradley," as his eyes searched your face in the darkening evening light.

"I would have been miserable," he whispered. "If you never sent that first package, I would have had nothing to look forward to each day and nothing I was excited to come back to San Diego for." His voice was impossibly deep and alluring as he said, "I thought about that a lot. What if you never sent it? Or what if someone else got it instead of me? What if I didn't somehow manage to earn your attention? I don't like thinking about that. And I don't like the idea of you worrying about me even though, at the same time, it feels really fucking good knowing that you would."

You were melting. You were going to turn into a puddle for this man. This lonely man who had an ex who hadn't been nice to him and never emailed him enough. This man who cleared his calendar today to bring you flowers and visit your kids as soon as he got off of the aircraft carrier. You wanted to say so much as you pushed gently on his shoulders, and Bradley slowly leaned back until he was laying flat with you on top of him.

"Gorgeous," he crooned in the moonlight with the sound of the ocean behind you and his big hands on your thighs. 

You pushed his hair back from his forehead and whispered, "You just got back today, and you gave all of your time to me."

His cheek was warm and rough with some stubble as your lips found his scars. You kissed them just like you told him you wanted to as he said, "It was just me being selfish. I wanted to be around you so badly. I'm already dying for more. Please go out with me again tomorrow?"

It took you all of a split second to agree. And maybe you were being selfish too, but you weren't prepared for the way your heart was racing in time with the butterflies. And how warm his big hands were as they inched up your legs while you tasted his tongue. And how much you knew you were going to want him to stay when it was time to say goodnight.

---------------------------

Your hands were all over his face and shoulders and in his hair, and Bradley was nothing short of delighted by this. Your lips drifted from his mouth down to his chin, and he had to try very hard to focus as they grazed his Adam's apple. He had your apartment keys in his hand, with which he was also squeezing your hip though his sweatshirt. It felt serendipitous that he was the one who got your letters, especially since he went from halfway in love with you to most of the way there after one day in your presence.

"Baby, you need to go inside," he warned, but something in his tone of voice just had you clinging tighter to him. "I need you to go inside."

You broke free from where your lips ended up on the side of his neck, and you whined. "I know, Bradley."

"God," he rasped, releasing you completely and taking a step back. "Say it one more time."

You unlocked your door, turned to look at him over your shoulder, and your kiss-swollen lips curled into one of those simply gorgeous smiles that earned you your nickname. "Bradley."

It sounded so fucking good. "I'll see you tomorrow," he whispered. "Lock the door behind you."

You did as you were told with one more little smile just for him, and then he was left standing there alone, trying to catch his breath while he got his phone out and worked on taking date number two from daydream to reality.

-------------------------------

Why is he like this? They are going to get even more handsy on their second date, and I can't handle it. And he can't even go more than a day without seeing her? He needs to be locked away. Thanks for reading! And thanks @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 10

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[youunravelme]

this is how you fall in love

author's note: let it be known, i've never been to jfk airport, and it probably shows. sue me. also sorry this took SO FUCKING LONG to write. it lowkey put me in a writing slump because it's just a monster but i hope you can forgive me. this fic is literally 18,952 words long, so i apologize in advance.

pairing: mat barzal x reader

summary: when confronted with the idea of going home without a date, you lie and say you have a boyfriend. which would be fine, except you haven't dated anyone seriously in a year. so instead of facing the ridicule of your family, you ask mat.

warnings: cursing (this is a given at this point), mean girl behavior?

you weren't quite sure why you said it.

actually.

scratch that.

you were 1000 percent sure why you said it.

you could not, would not be the family embarrassment yet again.

if you got one more wedding invitation in the mail, you were going to scream. you were happy for all your college friends, really, you were, but it was the presence of this one particular wedding invitation from your cousin angela that had you seething.

mainly because it was accompanied by a phone call from your mother.

"i told angela that she didn't need to put a plus one down for you, but she insisted. so don't feel bad if you don't have someone, sweetheart. plenty of people are still single at your age."

maybe it was the irritation at your mother's condescension, or the exhaustion from being the butt of every family joke for the past five years, that had you saying something you wish you could take back.

"i do have someone, mom!"

her scoff resonated through the speaker. "honey, you don't have to lie--"

"i'm not lying! it's mat!"

the pause that followed your white lie was louder than the new york city streets just outside your apartment.

"your friend, mat? you told me you'd never see him that way!" she accused.

you shrugged, despite her not seeing you. and thank goodness for that, she'd immediately know you were lying if she could see your face. "something just clicked."

"how long has this been going on?"

"a few months."

"and you never told us?"

"we wanted to keep it lowkey until we knew this was something real."

your mom hummed but seemed appeased. "well, i can't wait to meet him. you are coming down a week early, right?"

in hindsight, you should've told mat immediately instead of postponing it until two weeks before you had to leave. but he was out of town for games, then you had a work trip, and then time slipped away from you.

but there was nothing you and a tub of bubblegum ice cream couldn't accomplish together.

at least in matters of mathew barzal.

he answered the door a few seconds after you knocked. a smile overtook his face until his eyes dropped down to the ice cream in your hands.

"what do you need?" he asked with a quirked brow.

"who says i need something?" you blinked in what you hoped was an innocent manner.

mat sighed and opened the door wide enough for you to come in. "because you have ice cream, and you showed up at my door unannounced." but he took the ice cream from your hands anyway. "how'd you even know i was home?"

you shrugged and plopped onto his couch. "i checked your location."

mat blinked. "you have my location? since when?"

you rolled your eyes. "you make me sound like a stalker, you made me share my location with you when i was out drinking with my coworkers and i demanded to have yours as well."

you didn't get to see mat's face because he was walking into his kitchen to put the ice cream away.

"so why are you here?" he asked once he returned.

"can't i just come over and visit my best friend?"

mat blinked. "no. you want something. what is it?"

you threw yourself back into the couch cushions and groaned, tossing an arm over your eyes. "you're not allowed to judge me."

"well that doesn't sound fun."

"mat, i'm serious, okay? i got myself into some shit and you're the only one i trust to help me out."

you felt the couch cushions sink next to you. a hand removed your arm from your face. "are you safe?" he asked. "are you in trouble? do we need to get the police involved?"

you looked at the concern on his face and sat up immediately. "no! no no no no no! it's not like that, i just happened to lie to my mom and need your help."

"why would you need my help to lie to your mom? you're not making any sense."

you took a deep breath and squeezed your eyes shut. "i told my mom we were dating so i had someone to bring to my cousin's wedding."

a pause, followed by mat's obnoxious laughter.

"you told your mom we're dating?" he choked out between cackles. "how did you manage not to vomit after saying that?"

you rolled your eyes at his barbs. "you were the first person to come to mind! what else should i have done?"

"jeez i don't know, told the truth?"

you flopped back onto the couch again. "no, mat, you don't understand. you didn't hear how she was talking to me! 'plenty of people are still single at your age!' i mean the gall of that woman!"

mat laughed again. "'gall?'"

"yes, mat, some of us use words bigger than a fifth grader's vocabulary."

"careful, that's no way to talk to your boyfriend, now is it?"

you scoffed. "boyfriend? are you--" then it hit you. "you'll do it? you'll be the fake love of my life?" you jumped off the couch.

mat smiled and leaned back into the cushions. "ask nicely."

you rolled your eyes but a smile was already pulling at your lips. "mathew michael paul barzal, will you please be my boyfriend?"

he crossed his hands behind his head and smirked. "calm down, you don't have to beg."

"i would throw something at you, but you're already doing me such a huge favor."

"you owe me one," he smirked.

oh, you'd owe him big.

one week till going home

"okay, so how did we meet?" you and mat were seated at a booth in a coffee shop the both of you liked to frequent.

"no need to reinvent the wheel," he said. "let's just tell them the truth."

"that we met at a bar through mutual friends? that's so unromantic!"

mat rolled his eyes. "we're not a fucking rom com, sweetheart. we're lying to your family and being as honest as possible makes the lying look more convincing."

you sighed and sat back in your seat. honestly, you had no reason to be frustrated. mat was doing you a favor, not the other way around. and with it being the offseason, it wasn't lost on you how much mat was giving up to play house with you. he could be visiting his own family instead of lying to yours.

yet here he was, sitting across from you with his disgusting black coffee.

you must've been staring at his cup because he snapped his fingers in your face. "what? what're you staring at?"

your face twisted in disgust. "can't believe you like that shit. no cream or sugar?"

mat eyed the frappuccino nestled in your hands. "i'm sorry, i didn't realize milkshakes qualify as coffee nowadays."

"you're just mad that my drink tastes good."

mat rolled his eyes. "keep telling yourself that."

you looked down at your phone at your notes app agenda. you deleted the intricate backstory bullet point and moved onto bullet point number two.

"okay, how long have we been dating?"

mat blinked. "you're the liar, you tell me."

god, why were you friends with him in the first place?

"i told my mom we've been together for a few months but i'm not sure what constitutes a few."

mat shrugged. "let's say we got together around the time of my injury when you nursed me back to health and realized how handsome i was."

you rolled your eyes, but wrote it down in your notes app anyway. "okay so where was our first date?"

"am i the one who has to answer all of these questions? who says we even need all of this? it's not like they're gonna lock us in a room and interrogate us separately."

"my brother would say otherwise." mat gestured for you to go on. "when we met his girlfriend, my family immediately separated them so they could bombard them with questions. but since everyone will be focused on my cousin's wedding, we should be good."

"who should i be worried about?"

you thought for a moment, in your opinion, your entire family was a concern in terms of introducing them to mat.

there was your brother, who could be an ass in a heartbeat; though, when you thought about it, he'd probably just leave the two of you alone.

your dad and mom would probably ask a few questions. your grandmother would probably be too busy trying to stuff her cooking down his throat to really pose a problem.

if you were being honest, you were concerned about your cousin, angela.

she wasn't what you would call a "girl's girl." throughout your childhood, it was like she was competing against you in a competition you didn't want to be in. who had the bigger birthday, the most friends, the most boyfriends, the bigger house, the better car, the better college.

it used to bother you more when you were younger. the way she'd flirt with your boyfriends or bribe your friends to hang out with her. it was made worse by the enabling of your parents and aunt.

"just keep an eye out for angela," was all you said.

mat's brow furrowed. "your cousin? why?"

you'd never fully told him about your less than perfect relationship with her, but considering the two of you were in a public setting and he wasn't your therapist? you kept that information to yourself and just shrugged.

"we don't have the best relationship."

mat seemed to understand you didn't want to speak on it anymore so he nodded and gestured to your phone. "is your phone ready to be seen by your family?"

"i'm sorry, what? why would my family go through my phone?"

"they'll at least want to see that i'm your lock screen, you're mine, after all."

"i am not." but mat held up his phone and sure enough it was a picture of you and him after one of his games, wearing his jersey with your arms wrapped around his waist. "you're shitting me, why?"

mat shrugged and locked his phone, placing it down on the table. "i looked good in the photo."

you wanted to call bullshit, but he was already doing you a favor, so you let it go.

"fine," you said. "i'll change my lock screen." you scrolled through your photos until you found one you liked.

"can i see it?" he asked.

you immediately held your phone to your chest. "no!"

"i showed you mine!"

"that sounds like a you problem!"

"but it's not fair!" he whined.

"life's not fair, barzy."

he rolled his eyes but dropped the subject, knowing full well he could make you show him just by bringing up the favor he was doing for you. but for some reason, he decided to let it go.

"anything else?" mat asked before checking his watch.

you looked down at your notes app and couldn't find a reason to get him to stay. "no, i think that's it. why, do you have somewhere to be?"

he shrugged. "just meeting up with a couple of my teammates."

"during the offseason? don't you get enough of each other during the regular season?"

"sure, but we miss each other sometimes. i mean we go from seeing all the time to nothing. plus you got me staying in the city a little longer than normal."

you rolled your eyes. "you didn't have to say yes."

but he smiled anyway. "i know." he stood up from the table and knocked on it once. "text me the dates of travel this week so i can put them on my calendar. i'll get the plane tickets. let me know if you need anything else!"

he pressed a kiss on the top of your head and then he was gone.

an older woman stood up and walked towards you and smiled. "i just wanna say, you and your boyfriend are so cute together!"

maybe the whole fake dating thing would be easier than you thought.

going home

you slept over at mat's the night before leaving for the airport because it would make things easier on marty who agreed to drive you both to the airport. you weren't exactly sure how mat convinced marty to do it, but you made it a habit of not asking questions you didn't want the answer to.

"thanks again for the ride, marty," you said from the backseat.

originally, you and mat were fighting over who got to sit in the front, but not in the way others might expect. he said it was polite to let ladies sit in the front (which, when has he ever called you a lady?). you said he had the longer legs and needed the space.

marty groaned at the both of you to stop wasting his gas and to get in the damn car, i swear to god, barzy.

you got the backseat simply because you got in and shut the door before mat could pull you out.

"where are you and barzy headed?" marty asked.

"back to my hometown. my cousin is getting married," you supplied before he had time to ask follow up questions.

"and you chose barzy to be your date?"

you awkwardly chuckled. "tito was already in canada and i didn't have it in me to ask him to come back to the states."

"oh fuck off," mat said from the front seat.

the drive continued with you sporadically staring out the window or tuning into the conversation mat and marty were having about offseason workouts and the nba finals. when marty pulled up to the airport, mat was the first one out, opening your door a beat later.

he grabbed both of your bags in his hands, saying a quick thanks to his teammate for the both of you before shutting the trunk.

"i can carry my bags, mat."

he laughed, but otherwise continued on like he hadn't heard you. if you were a better woman, or maybe someone who hadn't been friendzoned for the last few years, you would've acknowledged the veins in his arms popping out under the strain of your luggage.

but you'd been down that road before back before you were friends and just admiring a handsome stranger from across the bar.

look at how that turned out for you.

you were expecting to split up at TSA since you knew mat had pre check and you most certainly did not. you were expecting him to hand your bags over (a backpack and a carry on) and head in the pre check lane.

so imagine your surprise when he not only refused to hand your bags over, he continued walking to the normal security check.

"mat," you hissed, but he kept walking. "mat." you stood on your toes and grabbed his shoulder to keep him from walking, but he brushed you off. so you stopped moving altogether until he noticed you weren't following him anymore.

"will you come on? you're gonna make us late!" he turned around, looking exasperated for some reason, like he wasn't the one being weird.

"mat, you need to go that way." you pointed to the pre check area.

he blinked at you, rolled his eyes, and turned around and kept walking.

"mathew michael paul barzal, where are you going?" you called after him, practically running to catch up to his long strides.

"i thought it was obvious, i'm headed to security," he deadpanned.

"but your security is that way mr. pre check."

"i'm not doing pre check. i'm going through regular security like you."

"why?"

mat glanced down at you and by that look alone, you would've thought you were the dumbest person alive in his mind. "please don't play dumb, it's not cute."

"i'm not playing dumb! and i don't care about being cute!"

"i'm not going to abandon you at tsa. i'd feel much better if we stick together, happy?" he stopped walking altogether and fixed you with a look. one that kept you rooted to your spot. "you happy, now?" you nodded. "good, let's go."

you followed after him and got in line.

tsa took a total of 20 minutes to get through. mat insisted you go first which meant you put your backpack on and grabbed your carry on before he could.

"you're ridiculous," he said as the both of you started the trek towards your gate.

"you sound like my mother," you quipped.

the rest of your walk was spent in peaceful silence. the both of you made it to the gate with about thirty minutes until boarding, which was the latest you'd ever arrived to a gate before.

you and mat argued about when to arrive the night before.

he won.

mainly because he was the one to tell marty when to pick you up from his apartment.

it felt like no time had passed when the gate attendant started speaking over the intercom. instinctively, you zoned out. you weren't an idiot, you knew when to board. this wasn't your first rodeo.

but mat started standing up when the gate attendant started calling for the first group.

you tugged his shirt sleeve. "mat, what the hell?"

it was a good thing your family wasn't there to see all the drama that unfolded between the two of you in the airport. anyone who watched the two of you since you'd arrived wouldn't believe you were in love.

not when you were actively getting on each other's nerves.

"will you stop?" he swatted your hand away only to grab it a second later to tug you into a standing position.

"what are you doing? we don't get on the plane yet--"

but he cut you off when he shoved a plane ticket in your hand with the words first class written on it.

"mat..." you trailed off. "what is this?"

he glanced down at you and rolled his eyes. "don't act like you've never seen a plane ticket before."

"asshole. why is it first class?"

he shrugged but wouldn't meet you eye. "i get more leg room."

"but why wouldn't you just put me in economy? mat i can't afford to pay you back for this!" you were panicking and beginning to think about how much you'd have to save before you could venmo him the full amount. you were about to pull your phone out to see how much it would cost before he grabbed your hand again, this time squeezing it in his own.

"don't worry about it," he said calmly. "i wasn't gonna let you sit alone, and i have the money for it, so i did it."

"but i can't afford--"

"i was never gonna let you pay me back anyways, so don't even think about how much it cost." while still holding onto your hand, he guided the both of you over to the gate entrance where your tickets were scanned so you could board.

you were sitting in first class moments later.

mat let you take the window seat while he got the aisle, saying it gave him more space, but you liked to think it was because he knew you liked watching the changing landscapes.

when the plane took off, mat leaned his head back in the seat and plugged his airpods in, closing his eyes as he did so. you mentally slapped yourself for forgetting yours, stupidly thinking that maybe mat would want to talk when he'd been uncharacteristically quiet the entire trip thus far.

you sat back in your seat and looked out the window as the clouds passed by. worries of how your family would react to mat, or worse, how mat would react to your family, filling your mind.

god you didn't think you could stomach losing him. in fact, maybe your entire idea was too risky. you'd take being the butt of the family jokes for years to come if it meant you got to keep mat. if you lost him--

your hand was squeezed twice.

you looked away from the window to mat who was holding your hand again and had an airpod out.

"you're thinking too loud," he said. "you okay?"

you nodded but it was clear he didn't believe you. nonetheless, he didn't push. instead, he held an airpod out to you. the tones of some pop song filled your ear.

mat didn't let go of your hand for the entire rest of the plane ride.

as soon as the plane hit the tarmac, mat was taking his airpod back and stuffing both into the case and back into his backpack. you texted your mom to let her know you'd just landed and would be getting an uber to her house.

while you were texting your mother, mat was grabbing your bags and holding up the line so you could slide out.

he didn't even acknowledge the glares and eye rolls being shot at both of you.

you and mat started your walk off the plane and towards the exit of the airport.

"so remind me who i need to be concerned about meeting? is it your dad?"

you laughed. your father was a lot of things, intimidating was not even remotely close to one. "not even close. it's angela that's the problem the problem."

"angela's the one getting married, right?" you nodded. "why are you concerned about her? she'll be too focused on getting married."

you laughed. actually, cackled. "she's had this planned out since we were seven. i'd bet my first born child that she has all of this finalized months ago."

"anything else i should know?" he asked.

you thought to yourself. what could you say about angela that wouldn't be mean but still be true?

"just....stay close. we need to go everywhere together, understood?"

he furrowed his brows. "even to the bathroom?"

you thought back to that one time in 11th grade when you didn't follow your boyfriend to the bathroom. "especially then," you said.

"got it. stick to you like glue."

you were staring at your phone and opening up your uber app when mat nudged you, but you ignored him.

but he nudged you before just grabbing your phone out of your hand.

"what?!" you asked.

he pointed. "is that your mom?"

a cold chill went down your back as you made eye contact with the woman who was your carbon copy holding a sign with yours and mat's (albeit spelled wrong) names on it. she was smiling and waving erratically with the hand that wasn't holding onto the poster.

"oh my god."

before you could even stop him, mat was walking towards your mom with an award winning smile. to your absolute horror, he placed your bags on the ground and allowed her to wrap him in a hug.

you zombie walked over to them, like you were trapped in some fever dream.

"honey!" she squealed when she pulled away from mat. "you didn't tell me how handsome mat was!" she said not so quietly.

god you wanted to die. curl up and die right there on the airport floor.

mat was snickering into his fist at your reaction.

maybe you should've asked beau instead.

home

your mom parked the car in the driveway; she nearly swooned when mat opened your car door for you and grabbed all of your bags.

"such a gentleman," was all she said before heading up the front porch.

the two of you followed your mother into your house where your dad, your brother, and his girlfriend sat in the living room.

"mat," you started. "this is my dad, my brother cody, and his girlfriend harper. guys, this is mat."

"i would wave, but my hands are full."

"oh honey, stop being rude and show mat to your room."

you blinked. "you mean, our rooms, right?" your mother and father were very traditional in that sense. so you'd banked on having to share a bathroom at most with mat.

not an entire bedroom.

not a tiny bed.

"we're not gonna act like the two of you haven't slept together already. i was born at night, but not last night," your father said from his position in the recliner.

you could hear mat choking on air while your brother cackled.

"besides," your mother cleared her throat. "cody's old room has been converted into an office, so that just leaves the queen bed in your room, sweetheart. that won't be a problem, will it?"

you shook your head, though you very much wanted to curl up in a hole and die. "no ma'am, that'll be fine."

your father crossed his hands over his stomach and leveled mat with a heated stare. "just because i know the two of you have slept together does not mean under any circumstances that it should happen under this roof. do you understand me, son?"

mat nodded, though he looked the most uncomfortable you'd ever seen him. "yes sir."

"oh honey," your mother started. "let them go settle in. dinner will be in an hour."

you led mat up the stairs and to your childhood bedroom. you finally gave up on offering to help carry the bags. mat, for the most part, looked happy to do something with his hands all things considered.

the room hadn't changed much since you moved out and away from home. the walls were still lilac, the carpet was still cream.

but the dolls you had growing up were missing, and for that, you were thankful.

mat dropped the bags on the ground and shut the door behind him. his shoulders relaxed for the first time since getting off the airplane.

"your family's nice," he said.

you immediately flocked to him until there was only about a foot between you. "mat, i'm so sorry. i didn't think they'd make us share a room, they never let cody do that growing up."

he smiled and placed his hands on your shoulders. "it's okay. it's just for a week. we've fallen asleep together on the couch before, it'll be just like that, just in a bed, okay? and i promise i won't stare when you get changed."

you nodded and wrapped your arms around his waist. "this is already so overwhelming."

"hey, we're the dream team, okay? i'm the best liar ever. we've got this in the bag."

and when he sounded so confident, how could you possibly believe otherwise?

the two of you got settled in your room before completely kicking off your shoes, changing into comfier clothes (with you in the closet and mat in the room) and settling into bed just to scroll on your phones. your mom came knocking before too long to tell you dinner was ready.

dinner was a pot of spaghetti, your mom's best dish. everyone was seated by the time you and mat made it into the dining room. mat, ever the performer, pulled your chair out and took the seat to your right, choosing to sit next to your mom rather than your father.

"are you waiting for a grand invitation? dig in," your father grunted. his irritation immediately kicked everyone into gear, with your family passing around garlic bread and filling plates with pasta.

the table was quiet aside from the sounds of forks scraping against the plates.

"so mat," cody started. "what do you do for a living?"

"oh," he said, wiping his mouth. "i play professional hockey."

"an athlete?" your mother questioned. "i thought you learned from the last one."

you about dropped your head into your plate. "mom...."

"sorry, sorry, i know we said we wouldn't talk about him, but he's going to be a part of the family soon."

mat's neck should've snapped from how fast he whipped it to look at you.

you nudged his knee under the table with yours. later, you hoped he'd understand.

harper cleared her throat. "what team do you play for?" she asked. "i grew up a devils fan, so i have to know."

"islanders," mat smirked, like it was something to be proud of, and to him, it was. to your family though? they were more concerned with the upcoming college football season to really care.

"oh god," harper replied. "at least you don't play for the rangers."

mat took a sip of his water. "agreed."

"do you still have all your teeth?" cody asked.

you inhaled and started choking on what you guessed was a spaghetti noodle. mat reached over and immediately started patting your back quite forcefully until your airway was cleared.

"yeah," mat said. "still have all my teeth."

"how did you two meet?" your mom asked. clearly your family was in interrogation mode, but at the very least these were questions you prepared for.

"at a bar through some mutual friends," mat answered, knowing good and well they weren't looking for you to say anything, their eyes were solely focused on your best friend.

"and out of all the girls, you picked this one? did you know she couldn't tie her shoes till she was in third grade?" cody laughed.

mat didn't.

which was odd, because he was usually the first one to poke fun at you.

"you wet the bed until you were nine," you shot back, ready to diffuse the tension.

a loud laugh burst from harper's mouth. not even her hand over her lips could quite muffle the volume of it.

cody rolled his eyes but held his hands up. "laugh all you want, harp. you chose this."

she smiled and leaned into him. "i did."

you stared until mat's hand landed on your thigh, effectively snapping you out of your daze. you looked at him and gave him a small smile before eating more of your mom's cooking.

dinner was over shortly thereafter, with small talk being made between the six of you. when it ended, mat was the first one up, grabbing both of your plates, while you grabbed the cups, and followed you into the kitchen.

"oh no, you're not washing dishes," you said when you saw him put the plates in the sink. but he made no sound of hearing you. "mat!" you hissed before placing your cups in the sink and grabbing him by the arm. "you're not washing dishes! you're a guest!"

"neither of you are," your mother walked in. "you just got here. your father and i will clean up dinner, the two of you can go relax and unwind. i'm sure you've had a long day."

"i can help--" mat started.

but your mom started twirling a hand towel with a smile on her face. "don't make me smack you with this, mat." and the very sight of that coupled with the lighthearted threat had you both sprinting out of the kitchen. you'd grown up in that house long enough to remember the sting of the towel on your legs when you annoyed your mother.

you also remembered trying to get back at her once and failing completely.

your father passed the two of you as he walked into the kitchen while your brother and his girlfriend took their spots on the couch. it only left one seat left in the room, your dad's chair. but combined with the air travel, the early morning, you were left exhausted and nothing sounded better than showering and crawling into bed.

"we're gonna head upstairs, long day and all," you said to cody and harper, the inference was that they would tell your parents.

mat followed you up the stairs and into your childhood bedroom. "you take the first shower," you instructed. "i have to wash my hair and it'll take longer."

he nodded and gathered his clothes while you searched your bag for a set of modest pajamas. he finished his shower in about twenty minutes.

you hopped in the shower and went through your routine, washing your hair and body before stepping out and drying off. when you got back to your room, mat was laying in bed under the covers watching the tv on your dresser.

in true fashion, he was watching espn.

"don't you get enough of this during the season? i didn't even know you liked baseball." you crawled into bed and cuddled into mat's clothed chest like you always did.

mat shrugged, wrapping his arm around your shoulders. "i was waiting for you to come back to decide what we should watch."

you hummed and buried your face into his shirt.

cuddling wasn't abnormal for the two of you, most movie nights at mat's place ended with you in similar positions. you were aware his friends made fun of him for it, but mat thrived off physical affection and you were all too willing to give it to him.

"just turn on a movie," you mumbled.

he selected a random mission impossible movie that you couldn't give two shits about. but when the movie and your fresh shower were coupled with mat running a hand up and down your back?

you were out like a light.

exploring the hometown -- the dress shop

it was an alarm that woke you up right as the sun rose. you groaned into your pillow, burying your face into the fabric. a warm arm tightened its grip around your waist. for a moment you freaked out, trying to wriggle away from the person who had you locked in, but the person grumbled and groaned.

"if you keep moving like that, i'm going to need a cold shower. so stop."

oh.

mat.

oh.

you immediately stopped moving and relaxed back into the bed.

"we need to talk," he said.

"can we talk later? it's barely even morning."

but mat had no intention of letting you sleep in. he used his arm to forcibly turn you over to face him. when you looked him in the face, his hair was mussed and in his eyes. before you could even stop yourself, you hand was reaching and moving the hair out of the way.

"what did your mom mean when she said the last athlete you dated was joining the family soon?"

you groaned and shoved your head into his chest, but he lightly pushed your forehead away from him so he could look you in the eyes.

"i'm serious," he said.

you sighed. "i dated this guy in 11th grade, his name was owen and he played football. he was the starting tight end and a grade older than me." you avoided looking at him and instead traced the letters on his islanders t-shirt with your fingers. "things were great, he was nice and all, so i invited him to my birthday party. he went to the bathroom, and i noticed he was gone for awhile so when i went to look for him, he was making out with angela."

mat's grip tightened on your waist. he said your name quietly, but you shook your head.

"it's fine," you said. "i told my parents but angela didn't get in trouble, not really at least. my aunt pressured me to make up with her for the sake of 'family' and 'feminism,' so i accepted her half assed apology and congratulated her when they got engaged a year ago."

"what a bitch," was all mat said.

"mat..."

but he was sitting up and pulling you with him. "no, don't brush this off. what she did was shitty. and your family just expected you to forgive her and watch her get married to him?"

"mat, it happened years ago. forgive and forget."

"i think you mean resent and remember," he grumbled.

"can we just go back to sleep? it's too early for this."

mat huffed but sank back into the mattress.

the two of you fell back asleep until light was hitting you in the eyes. "get up, sleepy heads! you can't sleep the day away!"

you groaned at the sound of your mother's cheering, or maybe it was the bright ceiling light blinding you, either way, the way you woke up the first time was better than this.

"mom, what time is it?"

"a little after 8."

you and mat groaned in unison. "you couldn't let us sleep in?"

"there are things that need to get done, sweetheart. do either of you have something to wear to the wedding?"

"mom, it's too early for this."

she sighed and probably rolled her eyes, something you would notice if you weren't too busy burying your head in the fabric of mat's shirt. in turn, he was burying his face in your hair.

"fine. you two can sleep the day away, but i expect the both of you for dinner tonight and to be dressed appropriately for the family dinner tomorrow." she left shortly thereafter.

"family dinner?" mat asked into your hair. "how is that different from regular dinner?"

"it's with the entire family, not just mine. you'll meet all my cousins and aunts and uncles and grandparents there."

"sounds like a lot."

"it is. they did this when my cousin andy got married two years ago."

mat hummed into the top of your head. "sounds exhausting."

"if you don't wanna see me for a month after this week is over, i wouldn't blame you."

he brought you closer to him, which you didn't think was possible considering you two were already pretty close. "i always wanna see you."

you smiled into his shirt, which you were pretty sure he could feel, but neither of you drew attention to it.

"we need to get up," you sighed, pushing away from him just a little.

"i'm already up."

on cue you felt something around your hip that had you squealing and falling out of bed laughing. "you absolute douche!" but it had no real bite since you were holding your stomach and rolling around on the floor laughing.

"what am i supposed to do when i wake up with a pretty girl pressed against me? ignore nature?"

you rolled your eyes and got up, searching through your bag for a pair of shorts and a t-shirt. "get dressed, asshole."

by the time you made it downstairs after taking care of your hair and brushing your teeth, your mother had set out a few granola bars for breakfast.

"i would've made eggs and waffles, but i'm already swamped with helping your aunt, i just didn't have the energy this morning."

"thanks, mom," you smiled and kissed her cheek once before grabbing a granola bar.

"do you know what you're wearing to angela's wedding?" she asked.

you nodded while you chewed your bar. "i brought that blue dress i wore to cody's graduation."

your mom's face twisted into disgust. "that old thing? honey, you can do better than that."

you waited until your mother turned around to roll your eyes only to catch mat coming down the stairs in a t-shirt and jeans.

god he looked so good it should be criminal.

but instead of fawning over him, you just threw a granola bar at his chest with he caught with an ease. "what're we doing today?"

"shopping apparently," you grumbled.

"oh don't give him attitude, honey. you should've packed something more appropriate to the wedding instead of that ratty dress you brought."

"it's not ratty!" you weren't sure why you were defending a dress you didn't care about, you'd only grabbed the first dress you saw in your closet. maybe it was the fact that she was so quick to dismiss something you chose to wear.

"that dress is years old, sweetheart. it's time for something new."

"thanks for the constructive criticism, mom. you never fail to give it at the best times," you deadpanned. you glanced back at mat who was stuffing the granola bar in his mouth. "you ready to go?"

he nodded, still chewing as you started walking towards the door.

"dad! i'm taking your car." you grabbed the keys, then mat's hand, and tugged him out the door.

neither of you spoke until you were already five minutes down the road.

"are you okay?" mat asked, eyes warily staring at your from the passenger seat. "you're gripping the wheel pretty tight."

you looked down at your own hands and eased up. "she just--" you groaned. "she always does this, criticizes me or what i wear. i know she means well, but it's irritating."

"for what it's worth, i liked the blue dress."

you gave him a small smile. "the problem isn't you, mat, it's not even the dress. if my mom thinks it's ratty, angela definitely will. and at the end of the day, i think that's what my mom is trying to save me from."

"why doesn't she just tell angela to mind her own business?"

"question of the year," you grumbled before pulling into the parking lot of a local boutique.

the two of you got out and headed inside, though mat looked a little out of place. "what's the dress code for this wedding anyway?"

"i'm sure if you brought a dress shirt and some slacks, you'll be fine."

you looked around, occasionally checking the dresses on the racks, but nothing caught your eye.

"can i help you find anything?" that voice nearly stopped you in your tracks, it was someone you hadn't thought about since you left for college.

you turned around and smiled at the woman in front of you. last time you saw her, you were standing in matching caps and gowns. you sat next to each other at graduation, and before that, you shared a few classes together. if it wasn't for the bright red hair and the comments your mom had made in the past about her staying in town, you never would've recognized her.

you hoped she wouldn't recognize you.

but she said your name in shock and smiled. "it's been so long!" she said. "back in town for angela's wedding?"

and really, you had no reason to dread this conversation, meredith was as nice as she was in high school. but you weren't sure if anyone was ever this happy to run into someone they knew from high school.

speaking of, you couldn't even remember why you weren't closer to her in high school.

"meredith, hi," you replied. "yes, i'm in town for her wedding. are you going?"

meredith nodded and smiled. "i'm actually her maid of honor."

of course she was.

that explained why you weren't close friends in high school.

"that's so exciting!" you smiled through a clenched jaw.

"i was shocked to hear you weren't in the bridal party though. is everything okay?" meredith sounded genuinely concerned, and while she was sweet, you never remembered her being very observant.

you shrugged. "we've grown apart since i moved away, it's water under the bridge."

meredith nodded until her gaze shifted to behind you were you assumed mat had just appeared. "who's this?"

"this is--"

"i'm mat," he held his hand out to shake. "her boyfriend."

meredith shakily grabbed his hand, you could see it tremble in his grip. "meredith," she practically swooned. a moment passed before she let go of his hand.

you had to keep from rolling your eyes. you were no stranger to mat's effect on women but it didn't make it any less obnoxious.

"we're looking for a dress for her to wear to the wedding," mat explained as his arm snaked around your waist. "i think she looks amazing in anything, but if you could find her something summery that matches her complexion, maybe a nice sundress, that would be very helpful."

you looked at mat like he'd grown a second and third head while meredith scrambled off to find something to fit his description. "are you okay?"

"why wouldn't i be?"

"you just listed of a theme of clothing without even batting an eyelash."

mat shrugged. "i was just being efficient. if you don't like what she picks out, we can always find something else or go somewhere else. but i thought the summery vibe would look nice with what i packed."

"and what did you pack? a white shirt and black slacks?"

"guess you'll have to find out in a few days," he quipped before lightly booping your nose.

meredith came back with an arm full of dresses and ushered the both of you back to the dressing rooms. she handed the articles of clothing to you and whisked herself away citing that she'd be around if you needed anything.

which was perfectly fine with you, it meant you didn't have an audience to trying on dresses.

"try the green one on first!" mat called as you shut the door behind you.

"you're not running the show here, barzal. as much as you would like to think otherwise."

you put the green one on first anyway.

you looked in the mirror, not sure if you liked the sleeves or the cut of the dress. was it too short for a wedding? it felt too casual.

"are you gonna show me? i'm assuming it doesn't take ten years for you to put on a dress, sweetheart," mat said.

"i'm not doing a fashion show for you, barzy."

"your boyfriend would like very much to see what you're getting, baby."

you rolled your eyes, mainly because he had a point. but amidst your irritation, hesitancy rose up but you didn't know why. mat had never given you a reason to be insecure, he was more than affirming about your place in his life and your appearance. you had no reason to be insecure, but yet it was rising up anyway.

still, you opened the door.

you poked your head out to see mat sitting on his phone until he heard the creak of the door. "well, let me see you!" he said.

you came out from behind the door as confidently as you could manage.

only for mat to let out a low whistle.

"oh shut up," you whined.

"you look good, baby," he smirked. "almost too good to wear out in public." you flushed under his scrutinizing stare that seemed to linger on some areas more than others and the nickname made heat slowly crawl up your neck.

"you're such a flatterer."

"just calling it like i see it, honey."

"will you quit it with the nicknames?" you covered your face with your hands.

"am i embarrassing you, baby?" he asked, voice much closer now. you didn't know why until you felt two hands on your waist.

"no."

mat pulled your hands down and smirked as he placed his palms back on your waist. "liar."

you rolled your eyes. "do you like the dress or not?"

"it's not about my opinion, do you like it?"

you all but stomped your foot in frustration. "mat," you whined. "what was the point of coming out here if you're just going to defer to my opinion?"

he shrugged like it wasn't bothering him to be that close to you; unlike you, whose heart was racing a mile a minute. "because i like to see dresses on pretty women, specifically you."

you shoved him away with a light push on his chest. the skirt of the dress bunching up a bit as his grip was pulled away.

"lemme see the next one!" he called as you walked back into the dressing room.

you tried on three more dresses, all of them garnering a similar reaction from mat, but none really feeling like the dress you should be wearing. none of them were nice enough to wear to the wedding without your mother, aunt, or angela saying something smart.

your hope was diminishing when you got to the final dress. it was plain in comparison to the others as far as beading and lace went, just a simple navy blue dress with a deep v and a small slit up to mid thigh. but you tried it on anyway.

"i don't know about this one, but i kinda like it. i wanted to know what you think," you said as you came out the dressing room.

mat looked up from his phone.

only for his jaw to drop.

you shifted your weight from foot to foot, back and forth, as you waited for a comment from him. mat, in all your time as friends, was never hesitant to share his opinion, but the longer he stayed silent, the more fearful you got that maybe this dress wasn't the one you should be wearing.

"do you not like it? i can--"

"no, you're getting it." he stood up and called meredith over who seemed to have been hovering just out of sight, like she was waiting for that exact moment. "she's getting this one, can you ring it up?"

meredith smiled but looked back and forth between you two. "of course, she'll have to take it off but--"

"mat, are you sure? i'm not even sure about this."

"baby," there he went, using another pet name. "you look fantastic, and even if you didn't, which you do, i took one look at your face and could tell you loved this dress. you're getting it." he said it so confidently you were inclined to believe him.

you started reaching for the tag on the dress. "how much is it--"

he ripped the tag off and handed it to meredith along with his card. "will you ring this up for us while she gets dressed, meredith?" he asked.

"mat, you don't have to pay--"

“let’s be honest, this is more for me than you." he said it so confidently, how could you possibly say no to him? "go get dressed," he said. "i'll be out here."

you quickly changed into your other clothes and grabbed the dress on your way out. mat quickly took the dress out of your hand and wrapped an arm around your shoulders. you didn't think anything of it until he pulled you in and placed a kiss on the side of your head.

you would've read into it had meredith not been in plain sight.

he must've done it to keep up the act.

meredith took the dress and wrapped it in a box that mat refused to let you carry, just like he refused to let you see the receipt. you told him that you'd just venmo him, but he ignored you all the way to the car.

preparation mode

your mom had ordered pizza for dinner which you and mat had taken up to your room. no one in your family batted an eyelash considering you both cited it as having a long day and wanting to unwind.

"so tell me about your family, the ones i haven't met yet," mat said through a mouth full of pizza.

you were currently wearing one of his t-shirts that you stole from his apartment a month ago and a pair of running shorts while you leaned back against the headboard. "well, there's my uncle mike, he's my mom's brother and the oldest in their family. for the most part he minds his business, he's on his fourth marriage and probably the last one because him and his wife don't even care to mask their indifference towards each other." you took a huge bite of your pizza and swallowed it before continuing. "then there's aunt patty who is angela's mom and she's about as nice as they come but also she's super passive aggressive and let's angela get away with everything."

"sounds like she's not actually nice, and you're just conditioned to think she is."

you rolled your eyes. "we don't have time to psychoanalyze my familial relationships, barzy."

"sure we do, if your aunt lets your bullying cousin get away with everything, then she's not actually nice."

"what does that make her then, smart ass?"

"a pawn." and he said it so lightly that you didn't even think about it for a moment. when you finally registered what he said, you furrowed your brows. so mat continued. "anyone who lets their child 'get away with everything' even when they're wrong is not a parent so much as they are a pawn in their child's game."

you blinked at him once. then a second time, wondering when your best friend had been replaced by your therapist.

"what?" he asked.

"i'm just trying to figure out what happened to my best friend. it's like you were replaced by dr. phil."

mat rolled his eyes. "i'm allowed to be wise on occasion."

"is it an occasion if it's never happened before?"

"what makes you say that?"

"i'm saying someone who gets hit in the face with a hockey stick or a puck every other game doesn't always have the best wisdom."

"but i do now! and that's what matters." he took another bite of pizza and hummed to himself.

"what?" you asked. "what was that hum about?"

"tell me about your other family members."

you explained how your cousin andrew (otherwise known as andy) was the oldest of angela's siblings and was married two years ago to his wife kelsey. they were distant from angela because she announced her engagement at kelsey's baby shower, but in true family fashion, that incident was pushed under the rug.

then there was thomas who was a year older than you and angela who had an affinity of sleeping around and generally not giving a shit about anyone or anything. he would say what he wanted when he wanted and for that reason, he was one of your favorite relatives. because, for the most part, he was the only one other than your grandmother who called angela out on her shit.

"what about your grandparents?"

you shrugged. "my grandfather died a few years ago and my grandmother is still around. she's honestly my favorite family member, though i'm sure that has nothing to do with me and cody being her favorites."

"oh i'm sure," mat said.

"and that's my mom's side of the family." you slapped your thighs and took a sip of your drink.

"what about you?"

you looked at him, confused at what he could possibly be talking about. "what about me?"

"you've told me about your family, tell me about you."

you scoffed. "mat, we're friends, what could you possibly want to know about me?"

he shrugged. "tell me something i wouldn't know. if you don't, i'm going to go downstairs and ask your mom to bring out the baby photos."

you rolled your eyes and sighed heavily, like it was some burden on you. "fine. when i was a kid, angela stuck bubble gum in my hair and i had to get a horrendous haircut. cody made fun of me until it grew out again."

"i bet you were still cute."

you got up from the bed and picked up a picture frame off your dresser. for some reason, your mother insisted on decorating your room with your worst moments, hence why your prom photo was hanging in the stair way. you handed the picture frame to mat who immediately smiled at your seven year old self smiling with two missing teeth and a shitty haircut.

"oh," he said.

"what?" you asked.

mat looked up with a huge smile on his face. "i definitely would've had a crush on you as a kid." you rolled your eyes and shoved him in the shoulder. "hey!" he protested. "i would've! you were cute!"

"shut up, you would not. i bet seven year old mat was the cutest boy in his grade and too worried about hockey to look at seven year old me."

"he might've been, i'd never know. but all i'm saying is if seven year old me knew seven year old you? he'd be in love. well, as much love as a seven year old can feel. in fact, i would've given you my favorite pokemon cards if you'd asked."

you could feel heat creeping up your neck at the idea, and how far it was from the truth. your classmates gave you hell for the way your hair looked, and it was such an odd and unbelievable story that no one took you seriously until the next school year when you grew your hair out.

"well, do you have a photo of you as a kid? it's not fair that you get unlimited access to all my childhood photos and i don't get to see you!"

mat rolled his eyes but pulled out his phone and scrolled through his camera roll. he flipped his phone around so you could see a photo of him in hockey gear with a big smile on his face. "aw mat," you cooed. "you were so cute."

"would you have had a crush on me?"

you thought about it for a moment. "i actually had a crush on this guy in my grade named frankie, so probably not."

mat's jaw dropped. "so my crush would go unrequited?"

"mat, honey, we didn't even live in the same country. this whole situation is hypothetical."

"tell me, did frankie play hockey?"

"what? no."

"was he funnier than me?"

"mat how am i supposed to know if second grade you was funnier than frankie?"

he shrugged. "i don't know. but was he?"

"he was the class clown."

mat groaned and fell back into your pillows. "seven year old mat is crushed. he stands no chance."

"honey, i cannot stress this enough, this is a hypothetical situation."

but all of a sudden, he stood up to his full height and walked towards you with the picture frame still in his hands. he placed the frame back on your dresser and closed the distance between the two of you. "what if it wasn't hypothetical?" he said, his tone shifted from playful to serious.

you locked his phone while you looked at him, to say you were confused would be an understatement. "what're you talking about?"

he shrugged and placed his hands on your waist, pulling you closer until you hips touched and it was like electricity struck your nervous system. "what if--"

a knock on the door interrupted anything mat was going to say. the two of you jumped apart. "hope you two aren't naked!" cody's voice sounded through the wooden door. "we're having a movie night and mom made it clear that you two need to be downstairs in five minutes."

"we'll be right out!" you called, though your eyes were still locked on mat's.

he reluctantly let go of you as you cleared your throat. you didn't know what was different about air around you, how it felt tense and warm at the same time.

you headed downstairs with mat trailing behind you and sat on the couch next to each other. you weren't sure what changed, but when mat put his arm around you like he had done in the past, you fought every urge to tense up. what was going on with you?

when the movie was over, and it was time for all of you to go to bed, you and mat dressed in separate rooms. you were in bed by the time he returned and you were too busy controlling your breaths to notice his hesitancy.

he called your name quietly, but you squeezed your eyes shut and evened out your breathing. mat pushed a strand of hair behind your ear as he got in bed before he wrapped an arm around your waist pulled your back to his chest.

your heart beat against your ribs loud enough you were sure he could hear it. you weren't sure why, or what it was, not even your ex boyfriend had your heart beating like that, and it took you months to get over him.

when mat finally fell asleep, you relaxed, and pulled yourself gently and slowly out of his hold.

you placed a pillow between you two.

it was on the floor on mat's side the next morning.

the "big family" dinner

"is this appropriate enough to wear to dinner tonight?" mat came into the room wearing a plain white tee and black jeans with adidas.

it should be a sin to look that good in something so simple.

"if you were anyone else, i'd say no," you replied.

he blinked. "what does that mean?"

"i mean somehow you make really plain outfits look good."

he smirked. "you saying i look good?"

"oh please. like you don't know."

mat put both of his hands in his front pockets and leaned his shoulder against the wall. "maybe, but it sounds better coming from your mouth." you rolled your eyes and shoved him aside as you gathered your clothes in your hands. "what're you wearing?"

"a shirt and shorts." you walked into the bathroom across the hall to change into your outfit before going back in the bedroom to get your shoes.

mat let out a low whistle much like he did at the boutique. "is that my shirt?"

you looked down and saw the islanders logo on the front and shrugged. "must be."

"when did you grab this?"

"must've been during one of our sleepovers." you walked right out of the room and down the stairs to join the rest of your family. the six of you (your father, mother, brother, his girlfriend, mat, and you) would be riding in two separate cars. cody tried to convince your parents that mat should ride with them while you rode with him, but you quickly shot that idea down. you wouldn't say you were embarrassed of your parents, but you surely weren't going to leave mat to his own devices with them.

which is how you ended up sitting in the backseat of your dad's subaru with a foot of space between you and mat.

"mat, honey, tell us about your family! do you have any siblings?" your mother asked from the front seat she tried to give him earlier.

"you have longer legs!" she said.

"and my dad would literally punch me in the chest if i didn't let you sit shotgun," mat replied.

"i have a sister, her name's liana."

"oh, liana!" your mother gushed. "what a beautiful name! i should've named you that, honey!"

"mom," you whined. "you don't think it would be weird to have the same name as mat's sister?"

she hummed. "i guess, when you put it that way..." your mother shook her head. "how'd you get into hockey, mat?"

"mom, mat's gonna be interrogated all night long, can we save the questions for later?"

"baby, it's fine," mat assured you. your heart picked up just a little at the pet name but settled down when he turned his attention back to your mom. "i grew up playing it," he said. "my dad used to play as well."

it was like your mom fell in love with your boyfriend even more. "see honey? he continued a tradition that his father set for him!" you kept yourself from snarking back and rolling your eyes and just smiled. "i wanted my daughter to be a nurse like me," she explained to mat. "but she wasn't interested."

"mom, i can barely handle the sight of blood and you thought i would be okay in the icu?"

mat cackled. "you should see her when i have cuts and bruises from games, she pulls out gloves and about douses my wounds in peroxide."

"i'm not gonna get a blood borne disease because of you, barzal," you replied.

he rolled his eyes but smiled at you anyway.

you zoned out for the rest of the car ride as your aunt's house grew closer. mat, ever the observant friend, reached out and grabbed your hand in his, squeezing it three times until you looked at him.

"you okay?" he mouthed. when you finally nodded he sighed and brought your hands to his lips, kissing it once before placing your joined hands between the two of you. your heart soared at the gesture, but you looked back out the window before he could see it.

your father parked the car in front of a giant house you were all too familiar with. memories flashed before your eyes of summers spent swimming in the pool in the backyard and playing with toys in angela's room.

"be on your best behavior," your mom directed towards you with a knowing look in her eyes. you weren't sure why, you hadn't made a scene in years, though you were contemplating it if your mom kept harassing you.

you and mat slid out of the backseat and followed your parents to the front door. your mom didn't even bother knocking; she opened the door and left it open for the rest of you to follow. mat trailed behind you, grabbing your hand at the last minute before walking through the front door.

you were immediately accosted by a plethora of voices and music, unknowingly, you gripped mat's hand a little tighter as your aunt rounded the corner with a glass of champagne and a large smile. you saw as she greeted your parents with hugs, careful not to spill her drink. when her eyes focused on you, or rather the hand you were holding, there was a sense of smug satisfaction that occurred when you saw the poorly disguised shock on her face.

"hey!" she greeted. "i see you brought a friend."

before you could say anything, mat was taking his hand out of yours and shaking your aunt's hand. "i'm mat, the boyfriend."

aunt patty smiled and then looked at you, like she was evaluating something. "nice to meet you, mat," she said before bringing you into a hug and giving the same salutation she gave your parents. "angela will be excited to see you, both of you!" she said.

doubtful, you thought. very doubtful.

aunt patty ushered the both of you further into the house; mat's hand returned to holding yours until it was time to go outside in the backyard and join the rest of the family, then his hand moved to your lower back.

the two of you walked outside and watched as your family mingled in the backyard.

"who do we talk to first?" mat asked.

you shook your head. "no one. we go grab food first. my family is easier to handle with food."

mat nodded and followed your lead to the table with assorted finger foods on it. the two of you grabbed a plate full of food and found a table to sit.

it wasn't long before the table filled up with cody and his girlfriend who'd arrived moments after you did.

"did you give him the family run down?" cody asked before taking a bite out of one of his deviled eggs.

"this isn't amateur hour, cody. i spent the entire evening yesterday prepping him."

and a coffee date and plane ride dedicated to perfecting a fabricated story.

as if reminded that you two had appearances to keep up, mat reached back and draped his arm around the back of your chair and leaned back in his own. he looked so comfortable doing so you would've believed him to be genuine.

it wasn't long before your other family members came over, your grandmother to start. both you and mat stood to greet her. she wasted no time pulling you into a hug and kissing your cheek, holding your face between her hands and smiling.

"my, my, my, you've grown," she said.

"you say that every time you see me, grandma," you replied.

"and i mean it every time." her eyes dart to over your shoulder where you're positive mat is towering over you. "and who is this?" she asked, but it was clear by the smirk on her face that she already knew. the entire family probably knew given how much your mother liked to talk about your love life.

"i'm mat," he said and extended a hand out to shake.

your grandmother immediately let go of you and all but pushed you out of the way to hug mat who didn't even hesitate to embrace her back. when your grandmother pulled away she smiled and glanced back and forth between you and mat.

"so you're the gentleman who stole my baby's heart?"

mat gave your grandmother a megawatt smile. "no ma'am, you have it backwards. i just tricked her into dating me, still not sure how i accomplished it though."

your grandmother looked back at you and all but swooned. "you didn't tell me how handsome he was."

you blinked. you weren't sure what kind of magic ability mat had but the fact that you grandmother looked ready to become a cougar or push you down the aisle said something.

"didn't think he was your type, grandma."

she rolled her eyes but the smile on her lips said enough. "you and that attitude, girl, i've missed it. i hope she doesn't give you this much trouble, mat."

he only reached around your grandmother and tugged you into his chest. "oh this one? she usually gives me a run for my money," he said before placing a kiss on the top of your head.

your grandmother looked at you and smiled.

and just like that, he'd won over your grandmother's approval. it was a record for you, actually. even your best boyfriend had to meet her several times to win her over.

and mat did it in a matter of minutes.

really, it wasn't fair how charming he was.

"well," she said. "i'll let you two finish eating, i'm sure your cousin will make her way over here at some point." and on cue, your grandmother and you met eyes and shared an understanding. while your grandma loved angela, she, unlike your aunt, was not blind to the passive aggressive comments made by your cousin over the years.

mat pulled your chair out and pushed it in as you sat down before taking his place next to you. his hand immediately made its way onto your thigh, his thumb stroking the outside of your leg.

he leaned in and murmured in your ear. "that went well."

you swallowed the weird sensation in your throat that probably had nothing to do with his touch and proximity.

"a little too well if you ask me," you replied. "she likes you a lot more than my other boyfriends."

mat shrugged like that wasn't the highest praise you could give him. "to be fair, your exes have always been shit."

"they have not!"

cody chimed in from across the table. "they have." you glared at him but he seemed unfazed. "do you want me to tally the boys you've brought home?" but he didn't even give you a chance to answer before he started listing your exes on his fingers. "there was cole who skipped your birthday because it wasn't important. then there was conrad who had the weird relationship with his sister. then there was randall who wouldn't speak to you for days on end and then text you out of the blue."

you rolled your eyes. "those don't count, those were high school boyfriends."

cody deadpanned, though you both knew he skipped one particular boyfriend who happened to be the shittiest. "oh i can skip straight to college and post college if you'd like. you've given me plenty of material to work with." so he continued. "there was yohan who didn't have a bed frame, just a mattress on the floor."

"we were in college!"

mat chimed in. "a mattress on the floor is bad, babe. you can't excuse that."

you huffed and sat back in your chair as cody kept going.

"what about peter who refused to ever get your number and only communicated through snapchat? or lance who had the armpit fetish?"

mat nearly spit out his drink. "a what? what does that even mean?"

you groaned and put your head in your hands until a new voice chimed in.

"it means that she wore a lot of tank tops when they dated, per his request. isn't that right?"

you looked up and saw the rock on her hand before you ever saw her face.

"angela," you said and tried to smile, though the poorly masked snicker made by cody told you it probably looked more like a grimace. "hey, long time no see."

"alright, that's our cue, harper," cody mumbled before him and his girlfriend left the table.

she smiled and fixed her eyes on mat. "and who is this?"

mat, as if sensing the challenge she was presenting, moved his hand from your thigh to around your shoulder. unlike meeting your grandmother, he didn't stand up or offer a hand, he just nodded and smile. "i'm mat."

"and who is 'mat?'" she asked in what she believed was a charming way.

you had to keep yourself from rolling your eyes.

"i'm her boyfriend," mat said before placing a kiss on the side of your head. it was with premature smug satisfaction that you witnessed the smile on angela's lips falter just a little. but then you remembered the times before when you introduced boyfriends to family and how angela looked at them with some sort of predatory gleam in her eyes when met with a challenge.

and mat's indifference to her was the biggest challenge of all.

a tall blond man walked over and wrapped an arm around angela's waist. "baby," he said. "i got you a drink." and he handed her a flute of champagne.

she sipped it but never took her eyes off mat.

"who're you?" owen asked. you had to keep yourself from rolling your eyes. all those years ago, you thought his blunt ways of communicating were charming, now they just grated on your nerves.

"honey, this is mat, the infamous plus one."

"boyfriend," mat corrected. "simple mistake, i get it. it's not like the rsvp's asked for a relationship definition or anything."

"how long have you two been together?" owen asked.

"a few months," you answered in unison, which immediately made angela quirk a brow. you started sweating, your hands started shaking in your lap.

almost as if sensing your nerves, mat reached over with the hand that wasn't around you shoulders, and placed it on your thigh, rubbing smooth circles into your skin.

goosebumps formed on your skin, but for an entirely different reason that a cold breeze considering it was nearly sweltering outside.

"we've been friends for awhile though," mat said. "known each other for about as long as we've been in new york."

angela hummed, but didn't seem convinced. "okay," she smiled. "enjoy the party."

when she walked away with owen in tow, you let out a sigh.

"you okay?" mat mumbled.

"that went better than i thought."

"i thought you said she was mean," mat said.

"she typically is, maybe she's changed though. it's been a minute since i came home."

mat hummed, but maybe your earlier conversations convinced him of angela's normal behavior, because he didn't seem like he believed you.

"don't hum at me," you said. "she could!"

mat shrugged and leaned back in his chair, his hand squeezed your shoulder where it rested. "okay," he said before placing a kiss on your temple. "i trust you."

the night continued on without much incident. cody got a little too drunk, but that was to be expected. your uncle, his wife, and your cousins all came by and said their hellos, but for the most part, you and mat just stayed at the table and talked.

it was moments like that when you forgot how easy it was to just be with him. you couldn't count the amount of times you found yourself sitting on his couch with your head in his lap, his hand in your hair, as you ranted about your shitty day at work or a frustrating phone call with your parents. days like that were typical with mat, because he made it so easy to just be.

you felt most like yourself when you were with him.

and sure it sounded a little codependent, but you were almost positive he was your other half.

but not in a romantic way.

never in a romantic way.

after all, he was way out of your league. the amount times he had women approach him at bars when the two of you went out were astronomical.

you were forever the friend, and you weren't really all that upset about it. so long as you had mat, you'd take him in whatever capacity he'd give you.

the night was quickly coming to an end. harper had cody's arm wrapped around her shoulder, assuring everyone she would be driving them home. mat's hand had found a new home on the small of your back as he guided you out and back towards the front door, following your parents who insisted on hugging every family member goodbye.

you felt your body lean into mat's touch and the side of his body, your own feeling drained and exhausted.

"hey," he leaned down and mumbled in your ear. "i'm gonna go to the bathroom, i'll meet you at the car?"

you looked up at him, faces close together. you were taken back to earlier when you almost kissed and for a moment, you found yourself imagining a world where you could. where you could lean up and figure out what chapstick he used.

"yeah," you stuttered out when it was clear you'd stayed quiet too long.

"great," he smiled before kissing your cheek and disappearing down the hallway.

you were immediately crowded by your mom, aunt, and to your displeasure, angela.

your cousin stumbled up to you with a bright smile on her face as both of your mothers talked to each other. "your friend was cute," she said. "wouldn't mind running away with him." she giggled, but you saw the truth in her eyes, the calculated stumbles and fake drunken smiles.

"oh, angie's had too much to drink," your aunt said, placing a hand on her shoulder. "you know how drunk people can be."

"i've always heard drunk words are sober thoughts," you stated.

your mom scoffed and waved a hand in the air. "oh honey, that's just a saying, angela doesn't mean what she says, not while she's intoxicated. after all, i have done plenty of things while drunk that i didn't mean in the morning."

you squinted at your mother, completely baffled by her excusing of angela. which, after all these years, shouldn't surprise you.

"what'd i miss?" mat popped back next to you like he was summoned.

"oh nothing--" your mother started.

"mat!" angela screamed, throwing her hands up in the air before wrapping them around his shoulders. "if i wasn't getting married tomorrow, i'd run away with you! it's too bad my cousin here didn't introduce us before!"

mat peeled her arms off his body and pushed her away as gently as he could. "before what? before you stole her high school boyfriend?"

what.

the hell.

angela's smile dropped right as your mom's and aunt's eyes widened. "and i'm not a fan of running." he grabbed your hand and pulled you out the front door, and waved down harper who was about to pull out of the driveway.

"we rode with my parents," you said, still in a daze from what he said.

"we're riding with harper and cody back," was all he said.

harper unlocked the doors for you and mat but didn't even bother asking why the two of you decided to switch rides.

the drive back to your childhood home was pretty quiet save for the country music playing softly over the radio. it wasn't your favorite genre, but you weren't going to complain.

by the time you made it home, you were exhausted. mat trailed you up the stairs after locking the front door behind him because harper mentioned something about taking cody back to their apartment instead of staying.

when he finally walked in the room, you were already changing out of your shorts. maybe it was a testament to how tired you were, or how long you had known each other that made you not give a shit about changing in front of him. you did, however, try to stay decent, so you waited until you had your pajama shirt on to remove your bra before sliding into bed.

mat had apparently walked out of the room to change while you had your back to the door because he came walking back in wearing basketball shorts and a tee shirt, like he did the other nights.

"you okay?" he asked, getting in to bed and sliding next to you. he bumped his shoulder with yours.

"why wouldn't i be?" but you wouldn't look him in the eyes.

"c'mon," he said. "you can be honest with me. i'm your best friend."

your eyes watered at his words, the ones he spoke in front of your family, and the ones he spoke just then. "thank you," was all you could get out.

he pulled you into his arms and for a moment, you were taken back to similar circumstances.

like when you watched marley and me. or when your neighbor with the cute dog moved away.

mat had always been there.

"what're you thanking me for?"

"no one's ever stood up to her like that."

mat scoffed. "i wasn't just gonna let her disrespect our relationship like that, real or fake." he kissed the top of your head. "i almost didn't say anything, wanted to keep the peace, but then i saw the look on your face and couldn't keep quiet."

"what look?"

"the kicked puppy look." you looked up at him as his thumb stroked a line on your cheek. something must've passed over your face because his thumb stopped its motion. "what?" you sighed and shook your head. "c'mon," he said. "you can tell me."

you sighed. "i just--i don't want her to take you away."

mat tilted your chin up and ducked his head down so your foreheads touched. "you're not gonna lose me, especially not to your cousin, okay?" you nodded. "i need to hear you say it, baby."

but how could you talk when he called you by pet names? how could you breathe when you could kiss him if you just lifted your chin.

damn.

did he know the effect he had on you?

"baby," he prompted.

"okay," you said. "i trust you."

"and that's all i ask." he kissed your forehead and pulled away, all too soon if anyone asked you. "now, let's watch a movie, i need to destress after tonight."

you settled into the pillows and laid your head on mat's chest as he scrolled through netflix with one hand; the other arm was wrapped around your back.

the wedding

the next two days were spent with you and mat walking around the city, nothing noteworthy happened.

but you woke up on the day of the wedding dreading what was to come.

the ceremony itself wasn't until that night, which gave you the entire day to worry about angela and mat.

his words should've comforted you, but you were too caught up in why you cared. he was your best friend, angela didn't want him that way. and mat was too loyal to let a girl come between your friendship, he never let it happen with his previous girlfriends.

but there would be times when you wouldn't be together that night. could you honestly expect mat to hang around the women's bathroom every time you needed to use it? you were lucky he got along with your brother and your grandmother as well as he did, but your grandmother would definitely leave early and cody would definitely ditch anyone in a heartbeat if it meant he'd get laid.

"you okay?" mat asked, placing his hands on your shoulders as you stared in the bathroom mirror. "you've been in here a minute. at first i thought you were taking a shit, but you left the door open." he rested his head on top of yours and made eye contact with you in the mirror.

"just stressed about tonight," you admitted.

"you got nothing to stress over, you got me, and we're not getting married. we'll just get drunk and party. sounds like a great time to me!"

"god, if i'm like this at someone else's wedding, i can't imagine what i'd be like at my own."

mat shrugged. "i wouldn't let you be stressed. i’d make sure to give you the wedding you want."

you pulled away and turned around, brows pulled together like attracting magnets. "wouldn’t that be weird though? you making sure my wedding was what i wanted?"

"considering it would be my wedding too, no i don't think it would be weird." he shrugged and said it so casually, you almost didn't register what he said. but when it sunk in, your cheeks heated up and you broke eye contact before lightly shoving him away.

"you're such a flirt," you said, hoping it wouldn't give away the way your heart raced in your chest.

"doesn't mean it isn't true!" he called after you. mat flicked on the fan and shut the door. "now watch a movie, i don't want you to hear me shit."

"we're not even in the same room, dipshit!" you laughed before heading back to your room and turning on netflix.

mat joined you after about ten minutes in the bathroom and the two of you watched a movie until your parents shouted from downstairs to start getting ready.

you got ready in the bathroom simply because that was where you makeup was. mat took the bedroom simply because it was easier. you put on your dress, fluffing out the ends to make sure no part of it was wrinkled before you started on your makeup.

you were finished rather quickly, mainly because mat kept calling your name like a child, waiting for you to fix his tie because he didn't know how to.

when you walked out of the bathroom, though, mat met you in the hallway. his eyes were focused on the tie in his hands until he heard the door open. he glanced up and his jaw dropped.

"fuck," he mumbled.

you could feel the heat going up your chest and your neck until it settled in your face. "do i look okay?"

mat swallowed and nodded. your normally chatty best friend was rendered speechless for the first time since you met him. he cleared his throat and gestured to you. "i knew buying that dress was a good move."

you rolled your eyes and smiled as you walked over to him. you took the tie out of his hand and wrapped it around his neck, tying a windsor knot until it was snug against his throat.

"i think you're trying to choke me."

you scoffed. "if you learned how to tie a tie, this wouldn't be a problem."

"if i learned how to tie a tie, i wouldn't have an excuse to be this close to you." his hands snaked around your waist and pulled your hips close to his.

"you should know you don't need an excuse to get close to me." you tried out the flirtation a little, unsure if he was joking or not, but given how his eyes lit up just a bit, you were pretty confident he was serious.

"baby--"

"sweetheart! we need to be leaving soon!" your mother called up the stairs.

you and mat sprung apart like the other had spontaneously caught on fire. neither of you would make eye contact too embarrassed to have been interrupted by your mother. though you couldn't meet each other's eyes, you managed to see mat gesture for you to go down the stairs first.

"you both look so cute!" your mother gushed as both you and mat entered the living room. "go stand in front of the fireplace! i have to get your picture."

you rolled your eyes. "mom, this isn't prom night." but mat was already tugging you over to where your mom was pointing and wrapping and arm around your waist.

your mom snapped a few pictures before hurrying the two of you and your father out the door. the wedding didn't start for another hour, but the venue was thirty minutes away and your mom wanted to make sure your aunt wasn't going to have an aneurysm.

mat held your hand as you walked down the front porch stairs towards the car. his grip was tight and firm. when you finally joined him on the sidewalk, you expected him to drop his hand, but he held onto it even tighter, lightly swinging it between your bodies.

he didn't let go until you got into the back seat of your mom's car.

he lightly chatted with your parents while you stared at the space between the two of you. the entire week had your mind whirling, you two were just friends, but sharing a bed, the physical closeness, the flirting, the near kisses, it was all driving you insane.

sure, you thought mat was good looking, but you'd long given up the hope that he'd ever like you. he was mat and you were you. even if there wasn't a large disparity between your perception of both of your physical attributes, you still would've felt the divide.

he was everything, practically your best friend.

and that alone was too important for you to risk on some juvenile feelings.

mat nudged you with his elbow. "you okay? you've been quiet."

you blinked back into the present, noting that your mother had turned on abba and was singing to dancing queen while your father hummed the tune under his breath. both of them were too distracted to notice or hear mat's question.

you nodded, meeting his eyes briefly before looking away, too scared to get caught in their orbit once more. "yeah," you said. "just thinking."

"uh oh. that's not good," he joked. but you didn't laugh. his face turned serious and he nudged you once more before grabbing your hand in his own. "you can tell me anything, you know that right?"

"of course," you replied.

he squeezed your hand twice and didn't let go until you got out of the car.

as your father pulled into the parking lot, you got a good view of the venue. a large building with tall windows and music blasting throughout the open doors.

once you got inside, your eyes were immediately overwhelmed by the visual stimulation of large flower arrangements everywhere with the most pricey looking lighting fixtures dangling from the ceiling.

it was extravagant, and everything you would've expected angela's wedding to look like.

"oh god," mat mumbled under his breath, loud enough just for you to hear. he leaned down, placing his hand on the small of your back. "remind me not to do this much at my wedding."

you rolled your eyes. "what if it's what your bride wants?"

he paused. "do you want something like this?"

"god no."

"then i don't need to worry."

you lightly shoved his shoulder. "quit joking."

"who said i was joking?" he asked.

you stared at him until your dad cleared his throat and reminded the two of you that you still needed to find your seats at the ceremony.

"honey," your mother grabbed your arm. "do you want to come with me to see angela? i'm just gonna check on her and your aunt to make sure everything is ready and together."

you were shaking your head before she could even finish getting the words out. "nope."

"honey, it's your cousin's wedding."

"and she didn't even make me a bridesmaid. i'm sure she'll be fine waiting until the reception to see me."

"i thought you weren't angry about that! i told you not to take it personal."

it took every ounce of will not to roll your eyes. mainly because mat was standing there, and if you let it slip how frustrated you were, he might step in and make your mom hate him. "i don't care, mom. but if she wanted me to see her before the wedding, she would've made her part of her bridal party. but she didn't so i'll see her when she walks down the aisle." with that off your chest, you grabbed mat's hand and marched towards the group of chairs where the ceremony would take place.

you quickly chose a seat close enough to see the actual ceremony happen without being too close that you could see angela promise her life away to the ex she stole from you.

"that was intense," mat commented. "you sure you're okay?"

you sighed and contemplated putting your face in your hands if it wasn't for the makeup you put on earlier. "i don't know why she wants me and angela to act like we're best friends, it's gone on like this for our entire lives, but it's never worked. angela has never liked me, and i'm tired of pretending like it's my fault. i don't even know what i did to make her constantly try to undermine me."

mat looked around before grabbing your hand and tugging you towards what you guessed were the bathrooms, away from the prying eyes of nosy guests.

"it's not your fault," he said, bending down so you could look each other in the eyes. "there's nothing wrong with you, either, okay? she's blind if she can't see how amazing you are. and your mom is wrong for trying to force a friendship. you understand?"

you nodded.

"i need to hear you say it, baby."

"i understand." a beat later. "thanks, mat."

he kissed your forehead and grabbed your hand. "anytime."

the two of you found your old seats taken by an older couple, so you sat in the same row as cody and harper who had shown up while you were gone.

the wedding started shortly thereafter with your parents joining you in the same row. your mother looked relatively calm for what you knew had to be a shitshow in the back room. angela was very particular, and while there was nothing wrong with that were it anyone else, your cousin's strong opinions often stressed your mother and aunt out.

the music started playing and the bridesmaids started walking down the aisle with the groomsmen and owen. you didn't recognize most of the girls, probably because you hadn't been around angela's friends since high school and you never came to her birthday parties after you graduated (not that she invited you anyway). the one bridesmaid you did recognize was meredith from the dress shop. she looked beautiful in her lilac dress. and her smile did nothing to giveaway what chaos the dressing room was in before she walked out.

with everyone in their places at the front, the music changed tune. every guest, including you, stood to their feet and turned around. everyone watched as the double doors opened and angela came walking down the aisle in a princess gown with her father escorting her.

she smiled brightly, probably basking in the attention she was receiving. she didn't even look at owen until she got close enough to the front that there was no one else for her to smile at.

i'd do it differently, you thought. when i get married, i won't be able to take my eyes off his face.

the officiant told everyone to sit and continued on with the ceremony. you mostly blocked it out, peering at mat who looked more interested in the ceremony than you were. he caught your stare a few times and smirked before grabbing hold of your hand and kissing the back of it.

and your heart soared every time.

mat was an affectionate friend, this much you knew. anytime you picked him up from a roadie, or when he came over after you just got back into town, he'd hold you in a death grip hug for five minutes at the very least. most of the hugs involved the two of you swaying side to side with mat mumbling how much he missed you into your neck.

all that to say, you weren't a stranger to his affection.

you were, however, unused to the kisses and pet names, all of which started as soon as you introduced him to your family.

it was the crowd cheering that startled you out of your stupor. you glanced at the front to see owen dipping angela in a kiss while the photographer captured the moment.

and maybe it was the bitterness in your chest speaking for the teenager who lost her first serious boyfriend, but the kiss itself looked more performative than like true love.

mat extended a hand to you when you realized everyone was standing and heading to the tables to eat.

"you alright?" he asked once your hand was secured in his own. "you keep zoning out."

you shrugged. "just thinking."

"about?"

"how do you know if you love someone?" you asked, replaying angela and owen's kiss in your mind. you were so preoccupied, you didn't notice mat scratching the back of his head and blushing.

"well, you uh," he stuttered. "why're you asking me? haven't you been in love before?"

he wouldn't meet your eyes, his own kept focusing on avoiding bumping into people as you made your way to an open table. mat pulled your chair out and didn't sit down until you did.

"i don't know," you continued on. "i thought i was, but i never saw forever with those guys."

"thank god," he mumbled.

"what?"

he looked up all doe eyed and innocent. "hm?"

"what did you say?"

he shrugged. "i didn't say anything. you must be hearing things."

you rolled your eyes, but the smile on your lips said you weren't really bothered by his lies.

cody and harper joined you at the table; your parents took the last two seats. all six of you sipped at the water on the table and waited for your dinners to be ready.

"so," harper started. "what did everyone think of the ceremony?"

you could've groaned, not because you weren't interested in weddings, you loved them.

just not angela's.

and talking about all the beautiful aspects of it sounded like a violation of your eighth amendment rights.

"oh it was so gorgeous, she looked fantastic," your mother supplied, fawning over your cousin as usual. but it was when she looked around the room before she leaned into the table that your attention was piqued. "patty was scared the wedding would need to be called off. said something about how owen was getting cold feet, she wouldn't say why though."

were you a horrible person for internally rejoicing at angela's possible stressor?

maybe just a little.

but you'd taken the high road your entire life. so in your opinion, it was warranted and earned.

mat nudged your knee with his. "at least look concerned," he mumbled with a smirk playing on his lips.

"i do! i am!" you said just loud enough for him to hear. mat looked at you until you cracked under his gaze. "okay, so i might be just a little smug, sue me."

he rolled his eyes, but the smile playing on his lips said he was far from annoyed.

your family continued to make idle chatter until the dj started announcing the bridal party. it wasn't anything that hadn't been done before; the bridesmaids and groomsmen danced their way into the room. moments later, angela and owen came in with their hands riased and cheering along with everyone else. your entire table joined in with the other guests and clapped and hollered until it was no longer socially acceptable.

dinner came out shortly thereafter.

again, it was nothing that hadn't been done before. a simple pasta dish with a side salad wasn't anything to celebrate. the food was absolutely delicious, you wouldn't lie about that, it was just interesting that angela, who prided herself on being different, had planned a party that didn't even crack your top ten favorite weddings.

but she'd never sought your approval anyway, so why would she start now?

you were shocked out of your intense thoughtfulness by an arm wrapping around your shoulder. mat didn't even look phased as he pulled you just a little closer to him, talking with your dad about the upcoming season like they'd been friends for ages.

the weight of his arm was comforting, reminding you of times he'd slung it across your shoulders after a game and pressed a kiss to your temple or when you sat next to each other at bars.

others had looked at your relationship with a microscope. sydney and grace both had asked multiple times if there was something more with the two of you and looked skeptical whenever you gave them a funny look while saying no.

he was your best friend, always would be so long as you never fucked anything up.

"how's your pasta?" mat asked.

you blinked. "same as yours."

he rolled his eyes yet again and kissed your temple. "smart ass," he mumbled against your skin.

dinner was barely over when music started playing, marking the sign of the first dance. angela and owen danced to "can't help falling in love" while everyone looked on. they didn't talk, they seldom even smiled until, like they were suddenly struck by electricity, they remembered they were being photographed and had all eyes on them.

you bided your time, sipping the water in your glass, because you knew mat was gonna drag your ass onto the dance floor like he had before at other parties and weddings.

sure enough, as soon as the song ended and the party music started, mat's hand was in yours, tugging you towards the center of the floor.

you dragged your feet as a front, just wanting to prolong the feeling of his palm encircling your own. you didn't know the name of the song, just like you didn't understand the light feeling in your stomach when mat pulled you close and placed his hands on your waist.

"in case i forgot to tell you," he shouted into your ear over the pumping music. "you look really pretty tonight."

you could feel the heat crawl up your neck. you ducked your head so you couldn't see him, but he pulled your chin up to look him in the eyes.

"don't get shy on me now," he teased, though his eyes weren't full of mirth like they usually were. they were soft, like sunlight filtered through a bedroom window. "come dance with me."

the two of you danced, hips shaking and moving to the beat of the music. mat always had a grip on you, whether he was twirling you around or had both hands on your hips.

you couldn't remember ever having this much fun at a wedding.

who would've thought it would've been angela's wedding?

but the music slowed down, usually signaling that it was your time to sit back down until hey ya! came on. so you made a move to step off the dance floor and head back to where your brother sat nursing a glass of bourbon, but it was a callused hand that kept you in place.

"where do you think you're going, baby?" he asked, a smirk playing on his lips. "you owe me a dance."

you hesitated, knowing that in the past, you'd danced the night away, but with him here, in front of your family, with your grandmother giving you a smile, you didn't know you could fake it any longer. you couldn't keep pretending that you weren't completely infatuated, overcome with love for your best friend.

your hand would've started shaking had he not had a steady grip on you.

mat pulled you close. "c'mon, i won't even step on your toes. i promise."

you relented and let him pull you back into the middle of the floor. he placed his hands on your waist and, for a moment, you thought you were dreaming. in another life, you'd be wearing white and be the prettiest person in the room. in another life, you'd have matching gold bands on your fourth fingers.

in another life, he'd be yours.

you wrapped your hands around the back on his neck, playing with the hair there absentmindedly.

"you're far away," he said. "come back to earth for a minute. what're you thinking about?"

you shrugged. "wondering if i'll ever get this," you answered honestly, even going as far as looking him in the eyes as you spoke.

"you'll get it," he said without a doubt in the world to be found. "i'll make sure of it."

"what about you? do you want something like this?"

he glanced around the room, eyes landing on the newly married couple in the center. "not if i'm not marrying you."

you blinked, heart in your throat. he looked so honest, but you'd known him long enough, seen who he's dated too many times, to know he was joking.

he had to be.

right?

so you laughed, closing your eyes and tilting your head back so that you unintentionally missed the small look of confusion married with hurt on mat's face. you did it to protect yourself, to keep yourself from getting hurt, and unintentionally hurting him in the process.

"i can never tell when you're joking, barzy," you smiled, hoping it covered the shake in your voice.

"but i--"

"may i cut in?" you glanced to your left and saw your smiling grandmother.

"oh i--" mat stuttered, flustered in a way you'd never seen before.

"sure!" you interrupted his train of thought. "i have to pee anyway."

besides, mat was probably safest with her anyway. angela wouldn't try anything while your grandmother was standing there.

you stepped away, waist feeling cold from the lack of contact and made your way towards the bathrooms.

it wasn't that hard to find the restroom, it was just a longer hallway. but it was far enough from the reception that the music was only a faint bass noise.

you walked into the bathroom and did your business. fluffing your hair and fixing your dress in the mirror when you'd finished washing your hands. you opened the door and saw shiny black shoes before you saw the man standing across from the woman's bathroom.

"owen?" you asked. "the men's bathroom is a little further down the hall."

"i know," he said, pushing off the wall to move closer to you.

red flag.

"what?" you asked, moving slightly out of the way so he couldn't push you back into the bathroom. "have you been drinking?"

"sober as a judge."

you furrowed your brows. "what?"

he took another step closer to you while you quickly turned so your back was no longer against a wall, but towards the party. if he kept advancing towards you, the weird tension would soon be out in the open and surely he would stop then.

right?

"i'm sorry for what i did back in high school."

"owen, what are you talking about?"

"for cheating on you. you're all i've ever wanted and it's my biggest regret to this day that i ever let you go."

you were gonna be sick.

"owen, you don't know what you're talking about. you love angela. you got married to angela. she is your wife."

"but i want you." he reached out to touch your hair but you backed up quick enough to just miss his hand.

"no you don't," you said. "you decided i wasn't enough nearly ten years ago."

"but you looked so good and so happy with him, with max or whatever his name is--"

"--mat--"you corrected.

"--it made me miss us. don't you miss me?"

"i don't even know who you are anymore, owen! that person you knew in high school isn't me anymore, and you don't get to decide you want me now just because i'm happy and you aren't."

"we were so good together!"

"we were sixteen, owen! we were children."

"but--"

"i gave you just about everything i could possibly give, and you decided it wasn't enough. you decided to get with my cousin while we were dating instead of breaking up with me. you decided to marry her. and now you get to live with that decision." you spun on your heel and were met with mat's stare. even in the dim lighting, you could see his jaw clenched.

"mat," you breathed like it was your last breath.

"you okay?" he asked.

"yeah," you said. "just telling owen where the bathroom was."

you both knew it was a lie, especially if the look on mat's face was any indication, he'd probably heard enough of the conversation. you allowed yourself to be guided back to the recpetion with mat's hand firmly placed on the small of your back.

you two kept dancing until it was time to send angela and owen off. while mat gathered your things, you said goodbye to your extended family members because you two were leaving tomorrow afternoon to head back to new york.

which scared you.

this last week had been amazing. pretending and playing house with mat meant unlocking feelings you'd pretended didn't exist for the entire duration of your friendship. and while you wished you'd never unlocked pandora's box, part of you was happy you could never go back.

a warm and weathered hand tugged on your forearm and snapped you out of your reverie. "don't let that boy go." when you looked down, your grandmother was staring at you with earnest eyes. "he loves you the way you deserve to be loved."

your eyes welled up with tears as you hugged her. "thanks, grandma."

"i mean it. don't come back without him, you hear me? i need great grand babies soon."

you flushed at the idea and whined. "please don't tell me you said that to him!"

but she didn't answer you, she just laughed.

"you ready?" mat asked, walking over with your brother and harper following closely behind. "cody said he'd give us a ride home."

"treat my baby right, mathew," your grandmother said. "or else i'll have to fly to new york and kill you, you hear?"

he smiled. "yes ma'am."

you hugged your grandmother tight. "i love you."

"love you more."

mat ushered you outside, following behind cody and harper to their car. none of you were interested in the send off, even if was only going to take a few seconds.

the four of you got into cody's car and drove off before your parents could admonish you for leaving early. cody and harper talked amongst themselves about bills and what their own wedding would look like whenever cody proposed (and if you knew him like you thought you did, it would be soon) while you and mat just held hands in the backseat.

it was weird, the physical touch even when no one was looking. but you weren't complaining about it, if anything, you were clinging to it, scared that once it finally ended you'd go into withdrawal.

cody parked outside of your parents house and let you and mat in before driving off. you headed upstairs, with mat on your tail, ready to get undressed and to curl up in bed with a stupid movie.

"that was fun," mat said. "did you have fun?"

you sat down on your bed and started taking off your shoes. "i always have fun when i'm with you," you said absentmindedly. a moment of silence passed. you looked up to see mat shifting from side to side. "are you okay?"

"what did owen want?" he asked honestly.

you sighed and stood up, walking towards him. "i'm not even sure. he started professing how much he missed me, but i shut it down because i don't have feelings for him."

a glimmer of hope. "you don't?"

"nope."

he nodded. "good."

you took a deep breath and stepped closer to him. "i could never go through with it anyway, i'm in love with someone else." please please please don't let this past week be a joke to him. please let him be a horrible actor.

he stared at you.

a moment of silence.

his eyes searched your own, like they were looking for something.

you could feel the tears well up in your eyes at the thought of his rejection. you'd take being heartbroken, but you couldn't take losing your best friend.

and then.

his hands were on your cheeks, his lips were on yours, and your heart had jumped into your throat. your arms wrapped around his neck and into his hair.

when you finally broke apart for air, mat was smiling. "i'm guessing you were talking about me?" he asked, though the smug tone in his voice said he didn't actually need to know the answer. not when the kiss had already confirmed his suspicions.

"you're such an ass," you jokingly shoved him away, but he caught your hand and used it to pull you back in, to kiss you once more.

"but this ass loves you." he paused. "that sounded a lot more romantic in my head than it did coming out."

but you smiled anyway. "this ass loves you too, barzy."

and two years later, standing in front of everyone in a white dress, you couldn't help but smile. lying usually got you in trouble, but you couldn't have imagined a better ending.

[danieyells]

@mayoigotokurousagi TIME FOR OUR FAVORITE FRANKENSTEIN'S MONSTER INSPIRED MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL. I mean. Maybe there's another you're into. Idk. I like Jiro. He's so. . .blunt. I'm so curious about him, I really really cannot wait until we get the Mortkranken chapter.

also, uh, brief content warning for a mention of assisted suicide? It's under the 'Default' lines, if you feel the need to avoid that.

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"Oh, there you are. I was about to go give you a health check. This saves time and effort." ああ、そこにいたんですか。今からあなたの健診に行こうと思ってたんです。手間が省けました

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"Are those letters piling up over there? It's interesting that doesn't bother you.  Not that my opinion is relevant." そこに溜まってるのは手紙ですか？よく気になりませんね。 まあ、俺には関係ありませんけど

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"I don't like unproductive discussions. Like this one." 非生産的な議論は嫌いですね。例えば、今のような会話です

"They said they wanted to die, so I prescribed them what they needed. I don't see the point of discussing ethics after the fact." あちらさんが死にたいと言うので、必要な薬を処方したまでです。今更倫理を持ち出されても、困りますよ

Hey. Buddy. Jiro. That's fuckin' dark dude. This is why you don't joke about wanting to kill yourself. Someone will take it seriously. Jiro will just hand you cyanide pills, a bottle of water, and direct you to a hospital bed to die in. Like jesus christ.

"I save lives that can be saved. It's part of my job to decide the order of priority though." 救える命は救いますよ。まあ、そこに優先順位をつけるのがこちらの仕事なので

"part of my job is to decide if your life is worth saving" IS ALSO A VERY DARK THING TO SAY. I love that his default lines are all very dark and callous. It kind of drives home a dichotomy between how he feels about just anybody and how he feels about you. I also like that he's just. . .kind of dark and gloomy and like ASPECTS OF HIM ARE VERY UNPALATABLE. Like I'm sure there are a lot of people who see those lines and think "that's gross why would anyone like him he's the worst" and THAT'S A GOOD KIND OF CHARACTER TO HAVE ESPECIALLY AS A LOVE INTEREST okay moving on

"One of our patients is thrashing around again? That's inconvenient. I'll administer a shot." また患者が暴れてるんですか？ はあ……面倒くさいですね。１本打っておきますよ

jiro stabbing you with a sedative filled needle like 'stop moving. you are annoying.'

"You should—  Hurk... Hm, I let my guard down. I better go back to Mo— Orgh... Hurk...!" あなた、そろそろ…… うっ……まずいな、完全に油断してました。早く帰っえ、うっ……おえっ……

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"Good morning. I'm going to take your pulse, so could you sit down?" おはようございます。脈拍測るんで、座ってもらえます？

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I was in a prolonged coma, so I haven't fully recovered yet. It's been a long time since I ate anything." 俺、長いこと昏睡状態だったんで、まだ本調子じゃないんですよ。飯なんて、しばらく食ってませんし

i wonder when he woke up. it must have been a few months ago at most.

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"What do you want? I'm conducting an incubation experiment. Please wait till I'm finished." なんですか？　今、培養実験中なので。話なら後にしてください

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"I'm about to receive my medication. It should take approximately one hour. Are you going to wait for me?" ああ、今から投薬の時間なんです。多分１時間くらいかかると思いますけど、待ちますか？

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"I attend classes every day since Yuri does, but sometimes they mark me as absent. I'm supposed to reply when they say my name? I didn't know that." 佑理に付き合って毎日授業に出てるんですけど、時々欠席扱いになってて。 返事が必要？　知らなかったな

"yeah you're supposed to let them know you're there." "i am one of the largest people in the room at any given time. that seems unnecessary." also it's cute that he only goes to class because Yuri does, but also he doesn't learn anything from it since he studied it all independently lol

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"The blood? I believe one of the wounds on my stomach tore. I'll have to get Yuri to suture it." ああ、この血ですか？　さっきから腹の傷が開いてるみたいなんです。佑理に縫ってもらわないとな

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"What's the purpose of educational facilities like this? You can learn everything you need through self-study." こういった教育施設って、なんのためにあるんでしょうね？　勉強なら自分ですればいいだけですし

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Who is that noisy blond person? He runs away whenever he sees me. That's rude, isn't it?" 時々見かける、うるさい黄色の人は何者なんです？　 俺の顔を見るといつも逃げるんです。失礼ですよね？

i love the 'isn't it?' like he doesn't know normal social convention but he's pretty sure you're not supposed to run from people like that.

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"You don't have to mind me. Go ahead and eat. Even in childhood I never really had an attachment to food, clothing, or shelter." 俺のことは気にせず、飯食ってください。元々、ガキの頃から衣食住にあまり執着がないので

hey jiro that's uh that's kinda fucking depressing you good?

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Yuri's holed up in the lab, so I'm going out. If he comes looking for me, tell him I went to bed." 佑理が研究室に籠ってるので、今のうちに出かけてきます。もし俺を探してたら、寝たと言ってください

Wouldn't Yuri just check your bed and not find you there though??? Also when will you sleep???? like i know he doesn't realize a week of allnighters isn't normal but jfc

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"Your face looks terrible. Come over here and inhale this. They're mild smelling salts. They'll wake you up." あなた、ひどい顔ですね。ちょっとこっち来て、これ嗅いでください。 軽い気付け薬です。目が覚めますよ

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Hello. I'm here to pick up Yuri.  Hm, that's strange. I thought he would be here." こんにちは。佑理を迎えに来ました。 ……あれ？ここにいると思ったんですけど

. . .i wonder why he thought yuri would be with you? how often does he lose track of where yuri is? and why pick him up wouldn't yuri be able to get home himself? unless he figures yuri fell asleep somewhere lmao

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"I can just manage to ingest water, so I brew herbal tea as an indulgence. Would you like some too?" 辛うじて水分なら取れるので、嗜好品としてハーブティーを淹れるんですよ。あなたも飲みます？

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"Yuri wouldn't get up, so I was about to give up on getting my morning medication. He got up after the ninth time he used the snooze button though." 佑理がなかなか起きないので、朝は投薬を諦めようかと思いましたよ。９回目のスヌーズで起きましたけど

Yuri and Jiro, like Rui and Haru, need healthy sleep schedules please.

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"What's this? A rice ball? I suppose I might be able to eat some of it." なんですか？　これ。 おにぎり？　まあ、少しくらいなら食べれるかもしれませんが……

can't you only eat fluids. . .are you gonna throw that up later. . . .

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"You already had tea at Frostheim? The tea I make tastes better though, so please drink it anyway." フロストハイムで紅茶を飲んできたんですか？　 まあ、俺の方が美味く淹れられますから、飲んでください

lmao the mortkranken boys really do not appear to have a great opinion of frostheimers!!! "you had tea at--pfffff nah their tea sucks ass drink mine instead."

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"I enjoy being alone. The noise doesn't really bother me when I'm reading though. Can I go now?" ひとりの時間は好きですよ。まあ、本を読んでいる時は、周囲の喧噪も気になりません。もういいですか？

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"What am I doing? I'm making confections. I'm used to making precise measurements when preparing medications, and it's quite similar to that." 今ですか？　製菓をしてるんです。 計量は薬の調合で慣れてるので、まあ、似たようなものです

jiro makes cupcakes and candies and stuff. . .he can't even enjoy them though. . . . .

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"See you tomorrow. ...What? You're the one who told me I should say that while smiling." また明日。 ……なんですか？こう言って笑えばいいと、あなたが言ってたんじゃないですか

i love lines where it's like 'you told me to do this so now i'm doing it.' especially when the pc is shocked when they actually do it lolol

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"We're doing a complete check up today, so please change into these. ... Do you need me to help you undress?" 今日は精密検査なので、この検査着に着替えてください。 ………… 脱げないなら、脱がしましょうか？

strip faster bitch

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"You want to know why I started studying anomalous infectious diseases? I don't know. I just became knowledgeable about them at some point and kept going." なぜ怪異伝染病の研究を始めたか？さあ、気がついたら詳しくなってたので。何となく続けてるだけです

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"My wounds often tear so I've told Yuri deep dermal suturing would be more effective than simple interrupted, but he won't listen to me." よく傷口が開くんで、結節縫合ではなく真皮縫合の方がいいと言ってるのに、佑理が聞かないんですよね

I get the feeling Yuri doesn't listen to most people. . . .

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Yuri's combat skills are poor, so I have to protect him. If he dies, there won't be anyone left who can treat me." 佑理は戦闘が下手なので、俺が守るしかないんです。あの人が死ぬと、俺を治せる人がいなくなるんですよ

"if he dies i die so i'm just kinda protecting him because i have to." kind of an oof lmao

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"It's been a long time since I had a family, so I don't know what you're supposed to do in these situations. Could you teach me?" 俺には長いこと家族がいないので、こういう時、どうすればいいかわからないんです。教えてくれません？

GET FAM-ZONED HAHA aaaaAAAAAA HE SEES YOU AS FAMILY AND HE WANTS TO TREAT YOU THE WAY HE'S SUPPOSED TO TREAT FAMILY. . . . . . ;0; just be yourself jiro we love you as you are, dark and morbid and a little distant but actually quite sweet--

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"There's a high probability that your curse is related to my field of research. It's a problem for me if you die." あなたの呪いは、俺の研究分野に関係している可能性が高い。 あなたを死なせるわけにはいかないんですよ

the bluntness and distance in this one is so perfect for Jiro haha ESPECIALLY AFTER THE "I WANT TO TREAT YOU LIKE FAMILY" ONE BEFORE IT. . .he went from being kind of sweet to being like "if you die it'll be a problem." and not even in a tsundere way just 'it matters to me if you die for academic purposes.

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"I'm going to see some flowers on Yuri's orders. Do you want to come? I'll be harvesting mandrakes." 今から佑理の指示で花を見に行くんです。あなたも一緒に行きますか？ マンドラゴラの採取ですが

"Yuri told me to take a break so I'm gonna go work near some flowers i guess."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Cases of the infectious disease gastroenteritis explode at this time of year. It's boring prescribing the same thing all the time." この時期は感染症の胃腸炎が爆発的に増えるんですよ。次から次へと、同じ処方ばかりで飽きました

attention darkwick students: please catch more interesting illnesses. thank you -jiro

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Ha ha ha ha! I observed Yuri fighting the urge to fall asleep during class today. Would you like to see the photos?" はははは！ 今日は授業中、ずっと眠気と戦っている佑理を観察してたんですよ。この写真、見ますか？

i really wish it were during the hours this one can play because i wanna record it lolol Jiro smiling and laughing because Yuri's trying not to fall asleep is so precious. Tiny little humanization for our monster boy.

(between 8pm and 5am)

"There are rumors that pollen contains ephedrine, a central nervous system stimulant. They're false, though." 桜の花粉に、興奮を誘発するエフェドリンが含まれるという噂があるそうですね。 まあ、それデマですけど

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"Good, today's temperature matches the forecast. I'll be starting a new experiment this afternoon, but the temperature regulation is difficult. It should be fun." 今日の気温は……予報通りですね。 午後から新しい実験の着手をするのに、温度管理が大変で。楽しみです

temperature regulation experiments are fun! i'm glad Jiro enjoys what he does.

(between 11am and 4pm)

ああ、また手足口病の患者でした。本来子供に多い感染症なんですが、免疫がない人は可哀想ですね "It was another case of hand-foot-and-mouth disease. It's an infectious disease usually more common in children. People without immunity are unfortunate."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"A dare? Okay, I'll do it with you. I've always wanted to try screaming in fear." へえ、肝試しですか。 いいですよ、付き合います。恐怖で叫ぶ経験を、一度くらいしてみたいので

"a dare" isn't really a good translation here--肝試し is a "test of courage", an activity usually done on summer evenings where you go someplace scary with your friends to overcome fear together! Or something like that. It's most often done in summer because that's when it's believed there are more like. . .supernatural occurrences? several other characters' summer lines mention more anomalies in Japan in the summer as a result of these beliefs. Either way it's cute that he's like 'oh. that sounds cool. i hope it'll make me experience fear.' I want him to scream in an exaggerated way, just SHRIEKING for the sake of it, not even because he's really that scared just "this feels like the appropriate situation for screaming :)" lmao

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Ha ha ha ha! Oh, sorry. I tried letting the stag beetles I caught for an experiment fight, and it was funnier than I expected." はははは！　ああ、すいません。 採取の時に捕まえたカブトムシ同士を戦わせたら、想像以上に面白くて

i feel like that's something that comes up now and then as like. a thing young japanese boys do. which makes jiro kind of childish in a way which is super charming? it sounds to me like he didn't have much of a childhood. so i'm happy he can explore it now and have fun.

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"I don't understand why you would go somewhere without a purpose. Why would you go to a mountain if you didn't need to harvest something?" 行楽ですか？　いえ、単純に何が目的か理解できないんです。採取もせず、山を歩くんですか？

mods, show him the beauty of nature.

(between 11am and 4pm)

"I went to the botanical garden to get some ingredients and I was given these yams. Do you like candied yams?" さっき植物園に原料をもらいに行ったらサツマイモをもらったんです。スイートポテトは好きですか？

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"A lot of people in Mortkranken dislike exercise.The sporting clubs in Darkwick must be made up of people from other houses." うちの寮は、体を動かすことが嫌いな人が多いですね。学内でスポーツをしてるのも、他寮の人ですよね？

i am once again asking why i was put in fuckin frostheim--

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I read books every day, not just in the fall. I like medical journals best. I don't remember what made me start reading them." 秋に限らず、本は毎日読みますよ。特に医学の専門書は好きですね。 いつからなのかは……忘れました

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"Hurk...! Phew... I'm fine... The change in temperature between indoors and outdoors this time of year causes my physical condition to deteriorate more frequently." うっ……はあ……大丈夫です……この季節は室内外の寒暖差のせいで体調を崩しやすいので……

i remember someone i followed also gags when going from a cold place to a warm one lmao. . . .

(between 11am and 4pm)

"I found an anomalous plant that can only grow in extremely low temperatures and successfully created a medication with it. It was just a coincidence though." 極低温のみ自生する怪異植物を見つけたので、試しに原薬にしてみたら上手くいきました。まあ、偶然です

'i made a medical breakthrough but it was just an accident' is the medical equivalent of 'i'm not a model'. also Yuri has a line referencing this one!

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Streptococcal infections are on the rise. They're spread through droplet and contact infection. Have you been taking precautions?" 溶連菌の感染が増えてますね。飛沫感染と接触感染が経路になります。 あなた、ちゃんと予防してます？

jiro says WEAR YOUR FUCKIN' MASK.

(between 8pm and 5am)

"There are no merits to lowering your body temperature when you're not experiencing inflammation. I made some herbal tea that warms the body. Do you want some?" 炎症時以外、体を冷やすメリットはないですからね。体を温めるハーブティーを淹れたので、いかがです？

His birthday: (October 13th)

"Whose birthday? Oh, mine? I forgot. Did Yuri leak my medical records?" 誕生日？　誰のです？ ああ、俺のですか、忘れてました。カルテ、佑理が漏らしたんですか？

"did yuri fuckin dox me--"

Your birthday:

"Oh, it's your birthday today, isn't it? What should I do? I suppose I'll go to your room later." ああ、あなた今日、誕生日じゃないですか。何をすればいいんですか？ まあ、後でそちらの部屋に行きます

jiro no you don't have to do that you are moving so fast WHAT HAPPENED TO BEING FAMILY WAIT--

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year. Why are you looking at me like that? Even I celebrate New Years." 明けましておめでとうございます。 なんですか？　その顔。正月くらい俺だって祝いますけど

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"What's this packet? I can't eat solids. You made it? Oh. I can probably eat some of it then." なんですか？　この包み。俺、固形物は食べれませんけど…… なんだ。あなたの手作りなら少しはいけます

bby if you can't eat it don't make yourself sick with it. . . . Actually since the PC feeding him let him eat food, maybe if it's something the PC makes he can eat it???

White Day: (March 13th)

"Here. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, something handmade for something handmade. Eat it here and tell me what you think." どうぞ。目には目を、歯には歯を、手作りには手作りをと思いまして。ここで食べて評価を教えてください

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"Yuri's kicking up a fuss and saying I deceived him? I don't remember doing it. It doesn't matter though." 佑理が、俺に騙されたって騒いでるんですか？　そんなことしましたっけ。 まあ、どっちでもいいですけど

i wonder if he actually pulled a prank and he's just hiding it really well. . .or if Yuri is just paranoid lol Yuri's for the record:

"Hmph, did you honestly think you could fool me? I won't fall for your cheap tricks. I've already been fooled by Jiro seven times today!" ふんッ。貴様も僕を騙すつもりで？その手には乗りません。今日はすでに、次郎くんに７回騙されたのでね

Halloween: (October 31st)

"I don't know much about Halloween. I can't eat candy though, so I have to play a trick on you, right?" ハロウィン？　よく知りませんが、俺、お菓子は食べれないので。 あなたに悪戯すればいいんですよね

Christmas: (December 25th)

"This tree? It's a fir tree. Yuri told me to get one, so I cut it down and carried it back here. My special artifact doesn't cut very well." この木ですか？　佑理に言われて、モミの木を切って持ってきました。俺の特質怪具、切れ味が悪いんです

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"Are you dead? Oh, you're alive." ……死んでます？　ああ、なんだ。生きてたんですね

jiro poking you with a stick like 'you dead?'

(13 affinity and above)

"Oh, Yuri's calling me. It'll be annoying if I pick up, so I'll just ignore it until you're ready to go again." ……ああ、佑理から連絡です。出ると面倒なので、あなたが動けるようになるまで、無視しておきます

'yuri is the only reason i'm alive but he's gonna yell at me so i'll just wait to pick up the phone' why??? i guess he wants to go back with you if yuri's telling him to come home lol ALSO DON'T YOU THINK IGNORING YOUR PHONE RINGING WILL WORRY YURI. . . .

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"You've skipped too many appointments. It's been a long time since your last check up...  I suppose I'll have to re-examine you." あなた、���診サボりすぎです。前回からかなり間が空いてるな…… まあ、今から再検査すればいいです

time to fill out your whole chart again! examination from top to bottom!

THERE WE GO. sorry that one took so long!! He's actually a bit of a goof but his no-affinity lines make him come off as extra cold and cruel. He just has to get used to you!! But I think it has a very charming contrast. AFTER THIS IS JIN! Tomorrow night maybe? it's almost midnight and i have to wake up early again and my insomnia kicked my ass last night. . . .

[lisbeth-kk]

May Prompts (28) Empty

The Luckiest Girl in the World (chapter 28)

Summary: Will Rosie be able to keep her secret from her parents until the big day?

Twenty-Eight Years Old

Seen in hindsight, the trip to Greece was a catalyst of what came later. On our last evening, Timothy and I had dinner at an almost empty restaurant on the cliffs of Fira. The sun was about to set, and the sea was bathed in colours of gold. When Timothy took my hands in his and asked me to marry him, it really was the perfect ending. Cliché, perhaps, but who cares? Luckily, he hadn’t bought the rings at one of the ridiculous jewellers on the island but brought them with him from London. (I said yes, by the way.)

***

As if faith wanted me to keep my secret from my parents, they were away on a three-week trip to New Zealand when we arrived back in London. I called Dee before I went to Baker Street to collect mail and check the fridge for outdated milk and decayed body parts. She had closed for the day, but when I called with my inquiry, she was instantly intrigued and asked me to pop into 221A before I left.

It was strange to see someone else living at Nana’s. Her old furniture had been donated to second-hand shops, new wallpaper, art, and futuristically designed chairs, tables and shelves made 221A look like something taken out of Star Trek or whatever. The kitchen and bathroom were recognisable with bits and bobs I remembered. Nana’s oven mittens, the kitchen utensils and the wallpaper. Over the kitchen table was a big photo of Nana.

“I’ve made some sketches for you,” Dee said after she’d inquired about the trip. “One on each shoulder, yes?”

She showed me her drawings and after some discussion, she made the adjustments I wanted. 

“See you tomorrow at six,” Dee said when I left. 

“Can’t wait!” I retorted excitedly.

***

Dee’s Den was everything you don’t expect a tattoo-studio to be. (At least if you’ve never set foot in one.) Airy, spacious and clean in the extreme. The first time I entered, I felt I needed to take my shoes off.

“No customer of mine will suffer from an infection. I’ve seen enough of that shit,” Dee said gravely.

Her improved sketches had been coloured when I arrived the next day, and they looked even better than I’d dreamt of. The tattoos would adorn each shoulder. One red poppy on the left, and a bee on the right. A t-shirt would cover them, and by the time Dad and Papa were back, they would’ve healed properly so I didn’t need to wrap them in plastic, and the soreness would be gone. I hoped to keep them a secret until the wedding day. My dress would be sleeveless and make sure to show off the tribute to my beloved parents.

***

We decided on a May wedding, and it was Dee’s idea to check if the venue from Nana’s funeral was available.

“She would’ve been so pleased that you all had some good memories from that place. Dancing and laughing, celebrating love.”

Both me and Timothy loved the idea, and we were in luck. Normally, the place needed to be booked at least a year and a half in advance, when it came to weddings, but they’d had a cancellation due to a broken engagement. Nine months to prepare.

***

I chose Liwia as my maid of honour. We had stayed in touch over the years, and she adored my parents, after they’d given her shelter when she needed it in the middle of her teens. Bella had been switched for Iris. They’d been together almost eight years, and Iris was six months pregnant with their first child. An unknown donor was the father.

“I’ve been meaning to ask if you were traumatised when you stayed with us,” I said on the final fitting of our dresses.

“What do you mean?” Liwia asked, clearly puzzled.

“Board games,” I explained dryly.

She laughed wholeheartedly and admitted that she’d never played Scrabble, Cluedo, orMonopoly, but stuck to chess and card games.

“Wise choice,” I retorted with a grin. “Though I have experienced knights, queens and bishops being thrown across 221B.”

***

My uncles picked me up at the salon where I’d been styled and dressed. Uncle Myc cocked an eyebrow when he saw my tattoos, but he was unable to hide how moved he was by this permanent gesture. Uncle Greg…well, he wasn’t that subtle, and needed a stern talking to from his husband to avoid ruining my dress and hair when he teared up and embraced me.

“You’re going to destroy them with this, love,” uncle Greg murmured.

I hadn’t been nervous before, but when the familiar place came into sight, my palms started to sweat, and my heart pounded in my chest. Inside, Timothy and my parents waited. The most important people in the world, apart from the men helping me out of the car. I kissed them and let them go in first to find their seats. One of the staff stood waiting for me to open the door once I’d decided to enter.

For a while I just stood there, my head blessfully empty. And then out of nowhere a wave of emotions washed over me. The memories of all the preparations and anxiety of the last week, regarding the flowers, the last seat arrangements we had to change the day prior, one of my shoes that disappeared without a trace… 

“Come on, Watson. You can do this,” I interrupted myself, using Papa’s former name on me to get me out of the unending loop of trifles and keep me focused.

I nodded to the man by the door who opened it for me, and I slowly made my way down the corridor to where Dad and Papa waited. They stood hand in hand outside the door to the ceremony room and turned abruptly when they heard my heels on the wooden floor.

“You look…”

“Oh, Bee…”

They were both teary-eyed, which didn’t bode well. I hoped they’d piled up with tissues, because this well would not be emptied any time soon.

With my heels on, I was the height of Dad. I seldom wore high-heeled shoes, so it was an alien feeling to stand face to face with him, literally speaking.

“You look gorgeous, sweetheart,” he whispered in my ear when he hugged me.

“Thank you,” I said and turned to Papa.

He’d frozen and he blinked profusely. Dad looked worried at him. He still hadn’t seen the tattoos. Papa’s eyes darted between them, clearly shocked to the core. I took his hand and squeezed it.

“Do you like them?” I asked quietly.

“Like what?” Dad inquired; his eyes hadn’t left Papa’s face during all of this.

“Look at me, Dad,” I said and finally he saw what Papa had seen minutes ago.

“Oh, my god,” he said and covered his mouth with his hand. “Rosie.”

“They are…” Papa clearly knew but was too shaken to believe what he’d deduced.

“Yes, Papa. They are. My tribute, homage, or whatever you want to call it. To you and Dad. To show you and everyone how much you mean to me. Dee made them while you were away. You have no idea how proud I am that I’ve managed to keep it a secret until now.”

Finally, out of his daze, Papa cupped my face and kissed my forehead and cheeks, careful not to disturb my hair or makeup.

“My precious girl,” he murmured. “I love you.”

“Stop! You’re making me cry,” I protested and tried my best to stay composed.

Dad sniffled and batted his eyes with a handkerchief.

“I’m never going to survive this day,” he muttered.

“John!” Papa exclaimed. “Don’t you dare.”

I knew I had to take the lead, or we would be stranded outside that door forever.

“Come on. The game is afoot,” I teased.

Also available on AO3

YES, there will be a continuation tomorrow.

This is also my entry for this month's Sherlock Challenge and the prompt ink.

@calaisreno @sherlockchallenge @totallysilvergirl @keirgreeneyes @raina-at

More tags in the replies

[jessicaloons]

Chapter 14:

And it’s coming over you like it’s all a big mistake…

Masterlist - Previous - Next

"That is narrow…" I said as I stopped my bike and looked around.

"Yeah, it’s really tight at some corners, but you’ll be fine!" Charles said and smiled at me encouragingly.

"But the track looks fun…" I began to cycle again, Charles next to me.

"It is! You’ll see! Now come one, the loser will pay for dinner!" he said and took off.

"That was unfair!" I yelled and he just laughed.

"The race leader decides the re-start… so hurry up!" he yelled back and I tried my best to catch up to him.

"That was pretty close, ma belle!" Charles laughed as I stopped next to him, almost out of breath "But I won anyways."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever!" I mumbled and we left the track, both joining our hospitalities.

I gulped down some water and sat down next to Dad who looked up from his iPad, a little frown visible.

"What’s up?" I asked and he pursed his lips before he handed me the iPad. It was a Twitter feed. People were still discussing why Checo wasn’t able to fight me off.

"I don’t like what they’re implying… how they call you names…" Dad said and I looked at him, he was really tense "You didn’t go through hell and back again for a bunch of idiots to treat you like that!"

"I mean, we knew that this could happen, we saw the backlash throughout the last months since Audi announced me as their driver…" I began but he shook his head.

"Yeah, but by now? They saw how you raced last weekend! They saw how good you are! Podium in your first race!" he was getting mad.

"I know Pops, but we can’t change that… unfortunately. I’ll ignore it and you should too. That’s the only thing we can do." I sighed.

"But it shouldn’t be the only thing we can do… we should do more to protect you! And not just you! Everyone who is the target of these internet elf’s!" Dad said and I started laughing "That’s not funny! I’m serious!"

"And I totally believe you, but they’re called internet trolls… not elf’s…" I laughed and he grinned at me, before gently smacking my arm.

"Stop laughing at me!" he chuckled and snapped his iPad out of my hands, as he did the mail app opened up and I saw a mail from Michael Schüler.

"Why did Michael send you an email?" I asked and Dad looked confused for a second before he swallowed hard "Dad? Why is he writing to you?"

"He umm-… he wanted to check in on you…" he said meekly and looked apologetic "I didn’t answer him or anything!"

"What does he want?" Dad just sighed and shook his head "Michael isn’t the type of guy to just check in on someone!"

"He asked who’s your manager…" he whispered almost.

"Of course… now that I made it to F1 he would love to take me back, right? Unbelievable! After he kicked me out? 3 months after I was almost dying? Because he couldn’t afford to manage someone who wasn’t driving?!" I was furious and Dad took my hand.

"Lizzie, I’m not replying! I don’t care what he thinks he could offer you… he’s out! And with Rita I think we’re good! She takes care of everything that has to be taken care of but stays in the back."

"Yeah, she’s great! And I don’t want anyone else ever again!" I said, thinking of Rita who managed me since the beginning of the season, taking care of everything but staying as far away from everything public as possible "She just looks out for me and not for her own benefits. She’s great!"

"She really is! And we keep it that way, no slimy manager from the past will destroy that!" Dad smiled at me and I nodded "And now go to Julie, she was looking for you!"

"Aye, aye Captain!" I said and mockingly saluted at him, before I left, looking for Julie.

P11. After a penalty and a 3 place grid drop. I shook my head as I walked out of the hearing with the FIA next to Felix and Pete.

"That’s ridiculous and they know it…" Felix said and Pete nodded.

"The data showed clearly that he didn’t slow down like he said he had to, that you were out of his way fast enough… a bunch of idiots!" Pete agreed and I was glad we were speaking German, I didn’t want anyone from the FIA or Ferrari to hear us talking shit about them.

"He’s such a cry baby! He impedes his fellow drivers all the time… and you weren’t even impeding him!" Felix said and I laughed.

"We can’t change it now, I have to make up for it in the race tomorrow! Valtteri is in a good position to get us some nice points, maybe I can snatch 1 or 2 as well!" I said and we kept on walking. In front of us I saw how Carlos, Mattia and Laurent were laughing and having a good time, on my behalf. Nice.

I sat in the car. Unbuckling my seatbelts. That wasn’t the result I was hoping for. Yeah sure, another podium wasn’t on my mind. I knew that last weekend I had some luck with Checo who couldn’t catch up to me after I was overtaking him because of his engine, then the late safety car and my set of new softs, which Lewis didn’t have. But still. P9? It could’ve been a P7 at least, but I made a mistake and my tires locked up. I could only make up 2 positions in the end. And that’s nothing. I slowly got out of my car and saw how Charles was walking away from his team and looking around, because I walked behind Nico and Alex, Charles couldn’t see me and took off his helmet, grabbed the towel to dry his face up. I slowly made my way towards him, following the 2 guys in front of me. After they congratulated him he pulled me into him.

"Well done, Charlie." I said and he shook his head a little.

"I had no chance in the end." he sighed.

"It’s still a P2! And you didn’t make any mistakes… unlike someone else…" I said and he cocked an eyebrow "Doesn’t matter. Go celebrate! I’ll see you later…"

"Lizzie wait!" he said but I shook my head and walked up to Max and Carlos, congratulating them, before I left. After my weighing I walked into my garage, where the team welcomed me warmly. Felix pulled me into his arms.

"I know it’s not the result you wanted. But it’s still in the points, Lizzie! You’re doing amazing! Be proud of yourself!" he said and I only nodded, helmet still on.

I walked into the back, clapping shoulders left and right. Saying we would come back stronger in Australia. I reached my space and sat down. Taking my helmet off.

"You look like you DNFd although you’re in the points!" Dad said as he crouched down in front of me "You did a good job."

"I did a shit job! Dad, my mistake cost me 2 positions! 2! That was just so stupid! I could’ve been in P7…" I rambled and dried my face off and drank some water.

"I know, but it’s only your second race! It’s okay to make some mistakes!" he answered but I shook my head.

"Dad, I can’t afford making mistakes like this!” I mumbled and he gently patted my back "Every mistake I make is another reason for the media to shoot me down…"

"I know Lizzie! But you have to show them that you won’t let them drag you down! Show them how strong you are! Admit your mistake, but it was just that, a simple mistake that can happen, next time you’ll make it better. Period." Dad said and he smiled at me.

"Yeah… maybe you’re right… ok, ok! You are right!" I chuckled a little and he got back up.

"Come on now, Julie is waiting for you, you have some interviews to attend!" he pulled me up on my feet and pushed me into Julie’s direction.

"Hi Lizzie, second race and a P8. Little lock up of your tires towards the end. Talk us through." Natalie Pinkham from Sky UK was the first on my list for tonight and I shrugged my shoulders a little.

"Yeah, it wasn’t the best weekend. The track didn’t suit our car the best I think. I was struggling slightly on Friday, yesterday was better but then the penalty came in… the race was okay, I managed to make up a few positions but then I made a stupid mistake that made me lose P7. I finished ninth so yeah. It’s 2 points but it could’ve been a bit more if I didn’t lock up…" I answered and she smiled at me.

"That lock up looked like you were avoiding making contact with Pierre and Lando?" she asked and I nodded.

"I wanted to overtake Esteban in front of me, but he defended quiet good and the track is pretty narrow, so when I went in for the overtake he closed the door pretty sharply and I tried it on the outside but Pierre and Lando were already next to me and I knew if I’m not braking I’m straight into Lando who would probably touch Pierre in the process so I braked and then locked up… I was too harsh on the brake." I concluded and she smiled at me sympathetically.

"But all in all it was a good performance! From P11 to P8, you gained 3 positions on a track that isn’t the easiest and also new to you?" she said and I looked at her confused.

"I finished in P9?" I asked.

"Yes you did, but Lando got a 5 second penalty, so you’re in P8 now." Natalie said and I nodded.

"Oh okay, yeah well, I only gained 2 positions because of my driving, the one because of Lando’s penalty doesn’t count for me." I answered and she frowned a little.

"You’re very hard on yourself, aren’t you?" she said, smiling sympathetically and I shook my head.

"No, I’m just very aware of my driving… Today wasn’t my best race, I know I can do better than that and I hope in Australia I can showcase that…" I replied and she smiled.

"I’m sure you will, thank you Lizzie!" Natalie waved me off and I walked to the next interview.

Most of them were all the same, talking about the penalty, how I managed to overtake some cars and lastly how I made my mistake. I answered over and over the same things, again and again.

"One last interview with ESPN Spain and then we’re good." Julie said and I followed her, stopping in front of the Spanish tv crew. I immediately recognised the reporter, he was sitting next to Salva Diaz in Bahrain.

"Hola Lizzie, tough weekend for you! First the penalty for impeding Carlos and then today your lock up. Compared to last weekend it’s a little set back, isn’t it?" the reporter asked and I took a deep breath.

"It wasn’t as good as last week, that’s for sure. The penalty was unfortunate, starting from P11 instead of P8 wasn’t optimal, but I managed to gain some positions, but then I made a mistake and that’s it." I answered and he nodded.

"Last weekend looked easier, compared to this weekend? What changed?" he asked.

"The track didn’t suit our car that well. I had some problems with the track. That’s it." I replied.

"It had nothing to do with the drivers and their cars you had to overtake this weekend?" he asked then and I was taken aback for a moment.

"What do you mean?" I looked at him confused.

"Checo with a damaged car was no problem apparently…" he began.

"But Lewis was and I managed to do that, today as well, I might add, I also overtook Pierre and Lando today. It was my own mistake that made me lose positions. Thank you. Bye." I had enough. Julie nodded and we left the slightly mad looking Spaniard behind.

"Sorry, but that was annoying! I’m sick of people telling me that last weekend was not my own doing in some way…" I sighed and Julie just gently rubbed my arm.

"It’s okay, he was an asshole! Let’s get back, have our team meeting and then go back to the hotel!" she smiled at me and we walked back into our garage.

As the door opened and Charles walked in I jumped off the bed and walked to him, hugging him.

"I’m sorry!" I whispered but Charles only chuckled.

"For what?" he asked.

"For walking away, for not attending the podium celebrations…" I sighed.

"That’s nothing you have to apologise for? I know the feeling all too well… after a race that wasn’t that good you just want to be alone for a bit… it’s fine, ma belle!" Charles pushed me a little off of him to look at me "Don’t worry, okay?"

"Okay…" I whispered and walked back to the bed, plopping down.

"I’ll take a shower, I'll be back in a couple of minutes." Charles mumbled and I nodded, switching on the tv.

"Alright, what are we watching?" Charles jumped on the bed, sitting next to me, back against the headboard.

"I don’t know, maybe a movie, I’m not in the mood to party, sorry. But I’m sure you’ll have a good time without me!" I said, zapping through the channels.

"Nope, I’m good. I don’t want to party, staying in sounds perfect. But I’m really hungry…" Charles answered and I looked at him.

"You sure? I don’t want to ruin your evening, just because I’m in a bad mood after messing up my race with a stupid mistake…" I said and Charles groaned a little.

"Come on now! You’re way too hard on yourself! It’s only your second race! And you’re still in the points!" Charles said.

"But I don’t want to be still in the points! I want to be up there! Top 5 at least! Everything below isn’t good enough!" I mumbled and pulled the blanket over my head.

"Lizzie! You’re a freaking rookie! Stop that nonsense! You were good! Maybe not perfect, but you’ll get there! I know it! You made a mistake, now you can learn from it!" he tore the blanket away from my face and leaned over me "And can we now please order some food? I’m starving!"

"You know that you can go party with Max and Pierre?" I asked him but he shook his head "Just because of me you don’t have to stay in as well! You can go!"

"Nope, I’m exactly where I want to be… and now give me the menu!" Charles made grabby hands and I gave him the menu from the night stand.

"Thanks…" I whispered after a while and he pulled me close to his side.

"Always."

"It’s like a family vacation again!" Liam cheered and made himself comfortable in Charles lap "Can we go see Koalas? And Kangaroos? Oh and Wombats!"

"We’ll try to see every animal there is to see in Australia, Bubba!" Charles replied and Liam beamed up at him "It’s really sad that Marcus and Benji couldn’t join in…"

"Yeah, after Lisa had the flu last week, they’re now both sick as well." Mum sighed and I thought about Benjis heartbroken face when we FaceTimed yesterday.

"They’ll join us next time!" Dad said and I nodded, looking out of the window.

"Are you okay?" Charles whispered, when everyone was still asleep and I turned to him.

"I have a bad feeling…" I whispered and he waited for me to continue "I don’t know, it probably is nothing… it’s just. I don’t know! It feels like something is happening!"

"You’re just nervous! That’s okay! You’ll be great! Albert Park is a track that suits not just your car, also your driving style! And you know it! Just relax and let us enjoy some quiet days together, okay?" he said and I nodded, as the flight attendant stopped next to us.

"Excuse me, Sir, we will serve breakfast in the next few minutes." she said, a flirtatious smile on her lips.

"Thank you." he answered and gently stroked Liams back "Hey little man, you need to wake up." he whispered in German.

"Nope, tell Mami I want to sleep a little longer…" he yawned and snuggled deeper into Charles' chest. I had to giggle a little and Charles looked up at me, smiling. I gently tickled Liams side and he sat up slowly, rubbing his eyes.

"Hey Bubba!" I cooed at him and he yawned again, looking around, his look stayed on the flight attendant that still stood next to Charles, glancing at him. He slowly turned around, looking at me confusedly climbing out of Charles lap into mine.

"Who is that?" he asked me and I laughed.

"I think she has a crush on Charlie…" I whispered and although I wanted to make a light hearted joke, there was a tinge of jealousy in my voice and I hoped Charles didn’t hear it. He chuckled at my words and turned to the flight attendant.

"Is there anything else?" he smiled at her and she shook her head abruptly.

"No Sir! Sorry!" and with that she disappeared.

"She’s weird…" Liam whispered and I laughed as Sissy walked up to us "Mami the flight attendant has a crush on Charlie!"

"Oh really? Interesting…" she chuckled "Come on now, they serve breakfast and you need to sit down in your own seat, so Charlie can eat in peace!"

"Okaaaay…" Liam pouted but followed his mum anyway.

"So, are you telling me now, where our first stop will be and why we’re flying to Brisbane first, instead of Melbourne?" I asked Charles and he just shook his head.

"You just wait sunshine, you just wait…" he said and smiled his adorable smile.

"Can we open our eyes now?" Dad said next to me and I couldn’t wait for whatever surprise Charles had planned for us.

"Okay, 3,2,1… open your eyes!" Charles said and I opened them.

I slowly blinked a couple of times to get used to the bright daylight as Dad next to me chuckled.

We stood in front of the Australia Zoo.

"Oh my god…" I whispered and Dad looked at me "Dad! You know where we are, right?"

"I sure do!" he said and he looked at Charles, pulling him to his side "Amazing, Charles! What a great idea!"

"I know that you are huge fans of Steve Irwin and watched his shows all the time and now the new show with his kids. So yeah, welcome to Australia Zoo…" Charles said and a van parked next to us "Oh and look who’s here as well…"

The door opened and Mick got out followed by Seb, Hanna and the kids.

"Heeeey!" I said and hugged first Seb then Mick "What a pleasant surprise!"

Next I hugged Hanna and high fived Emilie, Matilda and Philipp. As everyone greeted each other we headed inside. I was more than excited and the kids almost freaked out when they saw that we were welcomed with a bunch of different animals for us to pet. I crouched down next to Liam and Matilda who both looked at a lizard with big eyes.

"It has a blue tongue! That looks funny!" Matilda said and Liam nodded.

"Yeah! Why is it blue?" he asked.

"It’s a blue-tongued skink, their tongues are just blue, there is no specific reason for that." the zookeeper explained.

"Looks like it licked one of those lollipops that colour your tongue…" Liam chuckled and the zookeeper nodded.

"Exactly!" she smiled at him "His name is Oscar, you can pet him if you want to!"

Liam made big eyes and looked at me.

"Can you do it first?" he whispered and I swallowed, I hadn’t planned to touch that skink but now I had to. I slowly stretched out my hand and petted the back of it and Liam smiled, then he followed my lead.

"Good job, Bubba!" Charles said as he was crouching down next to us.

"Now it’s your turn, Charlie!" Matilda said and Charles' eyes widened "Come on! Oscar is cute!"

"Yeah… he really is…" Charles looked at the reptile and with a not so steady hand he carefully petted Oscar, the blue-tongued skink.

"You’re really brave, Charlie!" I chuckled and he pinched my side. "What about petting a snake?"

"No. Definitely not." he said immediately and I laughed. Charles and snakes. That was a big no.

"We have some special guests with us, I can see!" a young male voice behind us said and we turned around. Robert Irwin and his mum Terri stood in front of us, both with a koala bear in their arms.

"Hi guys, I’m Terri, it’s so good to see you all!" Terri introduced herself and I was a little star struck. We slowly introduced ourselves one by one and Terri and Robert smiled at us.

"Who wants to cuddle with Leia, our little koala joey?" Robert asked and the kids all made big eyes "Come on, she’s the cutest little koala girl."

"And this is Maxy, he’s Leila’s older brother." Terri rubbed the koala boy between the ears and the bear snuggled into her arm. I was in awe as I walked up closer "You want to hold him, Lizzie? He’s a good boy."

"Yes please! Oh god! Look at this cute little fella!" I was over the moon when Terri gently laid the koala in my arms and he snuggled into me "I will never ever let go of him! Oh god! He’s adorable!" I scratched the little head of Maxy and he made a cute little sound.

"He likes you!" Terri smiled at me and as Maxy climbed up a little towards the eucalyptus I held in my right hand, he lifted my shirt with his leg, turning it into a crop top.

"Hey little one, please don’t undress me!" I chuckled.

We spent the whole day with Robert and Terri, they were showing us around the zoo, the animal clinic with hundreds of saved wild animals that they will return back to their natural habitat once they’re healthy enough. The crocodiles where we could watch Robert feed a huge one for us. It was an amazing day and when we were walking out, after saying goodbye to Terri and Robert the kids were chatting excitedly and Dad and I were deep in a conversation about the crocodiles.

"Charles?" he looked up from his phone "Today was… incredible! Thank you…"

"I’m just glad you had a good time." he smiled and I nodded.

"More than a good time… it was perfect!" I replied and he sat up, careful not to wake up Liam who fell asleep after we watched a movie together, earlier.

"You and Pops looked so happy today… the kids loved it too… and you and that koala? Adorable! It was an amazing day for all of us!" he said and I smiled.

"Yeah, it really was! A very long, but incredible day. Thank you so much!" I said with a little yawn.

"You’re very welcome and now sleep! We’ll go to the beach tomorrow and then in the evening we’ll fly to Melbourne!" Charles said and I scooted down, cuddling up next to Liam, Charles switched the light off and then did the same.

The Thursday in Melbourne started with the shooting of an episode of Grill the Grid, I was really excited for it. Watching it the last years was, apart from the races obviously, one of my favourite things about F1. Seeing the drivers out of their element was so much fun, even though some were clearly showing how big of a geek they are, Seb recalling all of the World Champions going back was more than impressive. I stood in front of a camera crew, next to me a chart, waiting for what I had to do, feeling giddy and ready to go.

"We’ve got a height chart for you and we’ve got magnets with all driver’s names and we’ll give you 2 minutes to put them in height order from tallest to shortest." Angelina explained and I nodded, taking the magnets from her "Ready for your first Grill the Grid?"

"Yup! Let’s go!" I answered determinedly and the crew laughed.

"Ok, your time starts now!" Angelina started the timer and I began to go through the magnets.

"Okay, easiest first, Yuki is the shortest, done. Who’s the tallest? Esteban, Alex, Nicholas and George are all pretty damn tall! I’ll put them together… okay then Max and Lance? They look the same? Yeah that’s fine… Charles is 1.80 that I know so I’ll put him here… Danny? He’s the same as Charles, no? Then Carlos, Pierre? They’re a little shorter than Danny and Charles? I think?" I talked more with myself and was trying my best to get through the grid mentally. I looked at the board and the magnets in my hand. "I think after Yuki I’m the shortest? I think Fernando is the same? Or is he maybe even slightly taller? Yeah let’s make him above me, don’t want to bruise his ego…" I chuckled and Angelina and the rest of the crew laughed.

"He’ll be delighted!" she said and I laughed.

"Who do I have left? Lewis? I think he’s also around Carlos and Pierre… yeah that looks about right… ok then I think Seb and Mick? They are the same I think? God! I was just spending some time with them! I should’ve paid more attention to their height! Yeah let’s put them under Lewis anyway… Kevin? How tall or short is Kevin?" I stood there and tried to remember a moment where Kevin stood next to someone else but my mind blanked.

"And that‘s time!" Angelina said and I was shocked.

"What?! Already? Nooo!" I put the last names on the board, in no real order.

"Alright. Let’s see!" Angelina began and looked at her clipboard "So Ocon is the tallest, then we have Albon and Latifi, both 1.86, then George… next we have Max then Lance. So far you were mostly right, technically you put Ocon higher than Albon and Russell and Latifi… so yeah we’ll give that to you. But Charles is taller than Danny Ric."

"Is he? By how much? A centimetre?" I laughed and she nodded.

"Yeah! Charles says he’s 1.80 and Danny 1.79… next up Carlos, then Pierre. Lewis is shorter than our next three drivers: with a height of 1.76 we have Vettel, Schumacher and Norris…" Angelina said and I laughed.

"Lando? 1.76? Did he wear platoon shoes when they were measuring him?" I said and they all laughed.

"That’s what he says…" she said.

"You should give that to the stewards!"

"We might!" Angelina chuckled and looked down on her clipboard again "Now we have Hamilton, together with Magnussen, then Checo and Bottas, there you were correct! And then our bottom three Alonso, you and Tsunoda…"

"I mean I aced that part for sure!" I laughed and Angelina nodded.

"That’s 14, no 15 points for you! Well done!" she said and they all clapped and cheered.

"Easy peasy, Lemon squeezie!" I laughed. When I left for the media pen I felt relaxed and was in a pretty good mood. If the rest of the weekend would go like this challenge, it would be amazing.

Charles POV:

As I walked past the Audi hospitality coming from the press conference, Lizzie walked out and spotted me, her face lit up and she sprinted up to me, hugging me tight and when she pulled away, she kissed my cheek.

"Hi to you, too!" I chuckled and she blushed a little "What was that for?"

"Felix told me… well showed me." she replied, her voice a little shaky.

"Felix told you what?" I was confused.

"The video!" she said and I realised what she meant "You and Seb! Oh well and Joris, of course! I know what your edits look like…"

"I mean, I told you that I would do everything to get you a seat… but funnily enough, Felix said they already chose you before the video, but they liked it, it showed them they made the right decision!" I laughed and she hugged me again.

"Thank you, Charlie! So, so much!" she whispered and kissed my cheek again, my skin tingling and heating up.

"You would’ve done the same…" I whispered back.

"Yeah and I would’ve edited the video myself!" she giggled into the crook of my neck, tickling my skin with her warm breath and I hugged her even closer, our bodies melting together.

After a while someone cleared their throat behind us and we pulled away.

"We want to leave…" Andrea said, grinning like a devil.

"Yeah, umm-I need my stuff…" I began and Andrea held up my backpack "Cool. Thanks Andrea!" I took it from him and looked at Lizzie "You ready?"

"Yup, let’s go…" she smiled at us and for the millionth time, it took me to another planet.

The free practices went by in a breeze, I felt good in the car, the best I felt for a long time. I was confident that this weekend could be even better than Bahrain, not to mention Jeddah…

I waited behind Max at the pit exit. Q3 was about to start and I felt how the adrenaline rushed through my veins.

"Alright Lizzie. You can push a little more in sector 2, data showed that the traction there was good and you could give a little more." Pete said.

"Whole sector 2?"

"Yes."

"How many warm-up laps?"

"Try 2."

"Copy."

The tires felt great, there wasn’t much traffic on the track and after my second out lap I breezed past the track. I almost yelled out in glee.

"S1, PURPLE! S2, PURPLE! S3, PURPLE! LIZZIE YOU’RE P1!" Pete shouted on the radio.

"No way?! Are you sure?!"

"Positive. Max is P2. Perez P3."

"Charles?"

"Starts his warm-up lap now. Box now."

"Copy."

As I drove into the pit lane I saw Charles breeze past me and I hoped he would have an amazing lap as well.

"We use the used softs from this morning, you drove only one lap on them."

"Alright. Where am I now?"

"P2. Charles P1. Max P3."

"Let’s go."

I drove out of the pits. One last warm-up lap.

"With you on track Charles, Max, Perez, Russell."

"Will I get into traffic?"

"Not if you make it through in one go."

"Copy."

Let’s go. One last lap to put my car in the front row.

Sector 1 felt fast, Sector 2 felt even faster, as I breached into Sector 3 the yellow flag was waved.

"FUCK! WHAT HAPPENED!" I was fuming.

"Alonso crashed." Pete said.

"Damn it. Is he okay?"

"He’s okay."

"Is it over?" I was hoping for a no, but then I saw the red flag.

"Yeah." Fuck.

"Charles on pole. And then?"

"Max P2. You P3. Perez P4."

"P3?" I was disappointed.

"You were amazing! You had purple in S1 and 2. Probably could’ve had purple in S3 as well."

"It’s okay." It wasn’t. It sucked. But I had 58 laps to catch up to Charles. But for now I had to accept the defeat. Head back to the hotel and get a good nights sleep to be on top of my game for the race.

"Lizzie! What a weekend! Almost your first pole! P2 today! And it’s only your third race!" Mark Webber had to almost yell his questions because of the noise and I smiled as I saw Dad with Liam on his shoulders standing at the fence hugging Charles.

"Unbelievable! After the quali yesterday I had a good feeling that we could have an amazing race and everything worked so well! The guys at the pit wall, the pit crew, it worked all out in the end!" I answered and my team cheered even louder.

"You almost overtook Max instantly at the race start but then it got a little heated with Max, Sergio, Lando and Lewis?" Mark asked.

"I don’t know what happened exactly but yeah it got a little bumpy and then I had a puncture somehow and had to pit, but again the team did an amazing job and I didn’t lose too many positions." I replied and he nodded.

"What happened with Carlos? It looked like you two had a tough battle? Before his race ended?" he looked at me and I shook my head.

"I will have to check the footage to fully understand what happened… we had a tough battle indeed and when I tried to overtake him back he locked up and lost the rear I think? I don’t know, I have to look into it. But yeah I tried to go through the field as fast as possible and now I’m here." I concluded and he patted my arm.

"And you deserve it! Enjoy your P2!" with that I was ushered directly into the cool down room, where George was already sitting.

"I think after today there is no one who could doubt that you belong here!" he said and watched at the screen that showed how I overtook first Lando and Lewis in one go and later himself "You did amazing!"

"Thanks, George! You too! Checo had no chance!" I smiled at him as Charles walked in.

"I could get used to this. You and I, in here, together!" he chuckled and I laughed.

"Me too, believe me!" I said.

"Can I join?" George joked and I chuckled.

"Guys? Are you ready?" an F1 official picked us up for the podium ceremony. My second one in my third race. I couldn’t wait for the day where I could hear the German national anthem. Rather sooner than later.

"You almost won! You were this close to beating Charlie!" Liam chirped and Charles scooped him up.

"She really was close, right? For a moment there I thought she would overtake me!" he said and Liam made big eyes.

"Yeah sure… how long did you have to wait for that jump scare? 20 seconds?" I asked.

"Something like that…" he laughed and I rolled my eyes at him.

"You’re a jerk!" I whispered and he pulled me to his side, giving me his puppy eyes while pouting "But you’re a cute jerk, I'll give you that!"

"That’s what I wanted to hear!" he answered and I laughed.

"Come on now little man, it’s late and you gotta go to bed!" Dad said and Liam whined a little.

"Can’t we stay a little longer? Mami and Omi are already gone! They won’t miss us!" he asked but Dad shook his head.

"Bubba, Lizzie and I have to go now anyways! We have team meetings! And they will take a long time! So you can go ahead and tomorrow at breakfast we think about what we’re doing until we have to leave for the airport at noon!" Charles said and I nodded.

"He’s right! The team meetings will take forever!" I agreed and Liam sighed.

"Okaaaay…" he said and I gave him a kiss on his cheek and hugged him.

"Good night, little one!" I whispered and Charles did the same, before passing him into Dads arms.

"Good night guys, see you tomorrow!" Dad gave me a kiss on the cheek and a side hug to Charles before he left with Liam.

"I’ll pick you up later and we leave together?" Charles asked and I nodded.

"Yep… see you later!" I smiled at him and walked back into the Audi garage.

After reviewing the fight with Carlos I was in a bad mood, although everyone said it wasn’t my fault, for some reason I wasn’t convinced. Charles opened the car door and looked at me.

"Come on, ma belle… Carlos DNF isn’t your fault!" he said and pulled me to his side "You can’t blame yourself for the mistakes of others!" he kissed my temple and gently nudged me to get in, then he closed the door, walked around the car and sat down in the drivers seat.

"But it was my mistake, I shouldn’t have tried to get past him there!" I sighed and leaned back into the seat.

"You’re too nice, I hope you know that." Charles started the engine and I rolled my eyes "I’m serious, he was this close to sending you into the barriers a couple of times. Wouldn’t you always leave him the space, he would’ve ended both your races."

"How do you wanna know? You were ahead of us." I said and watched how he effortlessly merged into the busy road.

"It has its perks being the race leader with no one behind you, you can watch the race on the screens." Charles chuckled and I boxed his shoulder.

"Ha-ha. Very funny!" I groaned and he just shrugged his shoulders "Do you really think so? That I’m too nice?"

"Lizzie, yes, the part of the track was narrow, but he turned into you when you were leaving him enough space trying to overtake him… and when he realised that this time you won’t back down, he locked up and lost the rear. So yes, I think you’re too nice. It was his mistake not yours. You defended your position like a lioness! And it got you a freaking P2!" Charles smiled at me proudly.

"Maybe I have to get my edge back, you know? Maybe I lost it a little." I said and looked out of the window.

"One thing is for sure, the old Lizzie would’ve eaten him alive… that mistake of his? You would’ve made him do that after his first attempt." Charles said and I looked at him "But it’s okay, it’s only your third race after over 2 years… for now I’m just so proud of you, ma belle!" he squeezed my knee and I smiled. Yeah maybe I had to try and get my edge back "Now we will have a nice shower, then dinner and then we’ll celebrate your P2! You’re coming closer and closer to that top step after only 3 races!"

"We’ll celebrate your win first and foremost! And then maybe my P2!" I laughed and Charles grinned "I would’ve never dreamt that this would happen one day… we’re celebrating your win and my P2 after our race in Formula 1!"

"I never ever had any doubts! You deserve this! And it’s just a matter of time until we’re celebrating your first win! I really believe in it!" he said with such determination that even I started to believe in it "But for tonight, it’s party time!"

And party time it was, the club was full, dark and loud, a whole lot of people grinding their bodies at each other, the table in front of us full of bottles of alcohol. Daniel, George, Lando, Max, Alex, Yuki and Pierre were celebrating with us.

"I’d like to say cheers to Charles for a dominating weekend and an amazing race, congrats winner! Cheers to our lovely Lizzie for defending like a lioness, sorry Max!, securing her P2! And last but not least, cheers to George for his P3, after a tough fight with Checo, you deserve it man! Cheers to that!" Daniel said and we all toasted our glasses. Shortly after we made our way onto the dance floor were I could feel my body tingle from the adrenaline and the alcohol. I felt hands on my hips and as I turned around Charles, with adorably flushed cheeks, smiled at me.

"Hey pretty girl, you come here often?" he said in an overly flirtatious tone and I giggled.

"No, but my best friend won’t like it when you’re coming this close to me, Monsieur!" I chuckled and Charles raised an eyebrow.

"I’m not worried about a best friend… would he be you boyfriend? Then maybe…" he whispered in my ear and his breath on my skin made me shudder.

"Yeah?" I replied and he looked me deep in the eyes.

"Yeah…" he answered, almost breathless, then he took my hand and dragged me with him in a dark corner.

And then it happened. My hands in his hair, his hand on my waist, the other carefully grabbing my chin. Charles pushed me slowly against the wall, his eyes on mine, then he closes them, takes a deep breath and his lips touched mine. I felt a shudder going through his body, like he couldn’t believe that this was happening. His kiss was soft, even a little shy at first and it coaxed a sigh of contentment from my mouth which he breathed in, a low groan emanating from his throat. He pecked my lips again, gently pulling away and looking deep into my eyes, as if he waited for me to pull away. Then he captured my lips in a fierce kiss again, my mind was reeling, breathing stopped, skin burned, butterflies created a tornado in my stomach. His tongue poked at my lips and I allowed him the entrance to my mouth. His tongue tasted like lime and ginger. I was high above the sky and the oxygen level in my body went down, until there was nothing left. And that was when I felt it. Fear. Panic. What were we doing? What the hell were we doing! I loved him, more than just a best friend, yes. But this could destroy everything, our friendship, our families, us. This was just the alcohol taking over. So I pushed him off of me.

"Lizzie…" he began but I brushed past him, he followed me but I was faster, losing him in the crowd. I walked out of the club, across the street and turned right and kept walking, bringing enough space between us. As I got my phone out to order an Uber I saw 5 missed calls and some texts. I ignored them and waited for the Uber.

I closed the door and sank down to the floor, trying to steady my breath. What happened? What the actual fuck just happened? For years I never acted upon my instincts, my feelings, even if they were yearning for me to do it. Even when every fibre of body was screaming at me to finally do it. The alcohol. It clouded my mind. I had way too much. My breathing ragged and I felt sick. Why did he do it? How many drinks did he have? Why didn’t he stop it? My mind was running wild and I leaned my head back at the door and took some deep breaths. I groaned and checked the time on my phone. 03:12. 17 missed calls from Charles, 6 from Pierre. 25+ messages. He would check our hotel first. I needed to get out of here. I had to book another room. I needed space. I threw all my belongings I could see in my suitcase, changed into leggings and a Hoodie, took my backpack and left the room.

"I’m sorry Miss Doetterer, there aren’t any rooms available. I could offer you one of our primary suits if you’re interested?" the lady at the front desk said and I shook my head.

"Can you order me a cab to the airport? Like now? I just book the first flight available at the airport that’s fine." I asked and she nodded and called a cab.

Charles POV:

"Where the fuck is she?" I stalked through our room into the bathroom but she was gone "Pierre, her suitcase is gone? Most of her stuff?"

"What happened back in the club, Charles? You guys were fine and then out of nowhere you weren’t anymore?" he asked and sat down on the bed.

"We kissed…" I sighed and plopped down next to him, my head was pounding, I was tired but also scared, not knowing where Lizzie was, was making me anxious.

"Oh… okay? And?" he asked and I closed my eyes.

"It was amazing… god Pierre! My whole body was on fire! And there was like a million of butterflies or whatever in my stomach going wild and crazy! Everything tingled! Her lips were so soft and that little sigh… It felt natural. It felt right. Like our bodies belong together… I can’t get enough of her… she’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of…" I said and Pierre laughed.

"Oh cabron. You’re down bad! But then again, you’ve always been for her! But it seems like she didn’t like it, or why is she gone?" he asked and I swallowed hard.

"Because she’s scared… I could see it in her eyes. She’s scared of this…" I said and he nodded.

"Let’s call the front desk? Maybe she asked for another room because she needed space?" this time I nodded, sat up and he took the phone from the night stand and made the call.

"Alright. Thank you, you too." Pierre hung up and I looked at him "So she asked for another room. There was non available, so she took a cab to the airport to check into the first flight to Europe, that was around an hour ago…"

"She’s gone?" I whispered and Pierre nodded. I fell back down again. Hands covering my face. I tried to take a deep breath but it didn’t work. My lungs were burning. Eyes stinging with tears. Because I couldn’t control my feelings, my instincts, my whatever, she felt the urge to flee the country. I pushed her into running away from me. Good fucking job, Charles.

"Charles? You ok?" Pierre asked and I shook my head, tears threatening to spill.

"What if I destroyed the one good thing in my life that I had? Lizzie gave her everything for me and I pushed her to the point where she had to flee the country?" I whispered, my voice hoarse, throat dry.

"Maybe she just needs some time to figure out her feelings for you, because even a blind guy could see that you two are in love for… basically forever?" Pierre said and I just nodded "Go to sleep now, Charles. Call her when you’re back home. You two will figure it out."

"Thanks, Pierre." I mumbled and sat up again as my phone rang, I grasped it from the bed and answered it without checking the ID "Lizzie?"

"Excuse me, who is this?" a male voice.

"Who wants to know that?" I ask confused and Pierre looked at me asking so I put the call on speaker.

"My name’s officer Matt Breckman, customs and border control, Melbourne International Airport, am I speaking to Mr. Charles Leclerc?" the male voice asked and I swallowed.

"Yes, Sir, that’s me." I answered "Can you please tell me what’s going on?"

"Are you in the possession of Miss Elisabeth Doetterer’s passport?" he asked then and before I could answer I heard a familiar voice in the background.

"He’s not in possession of my passport, I forgot it in our room when I left!" Lizzie said annoyed.

"Lizzie? What’s going on?" I asked nervously.

"Sir, we had to take Miss Doetterer into our custody after she checked in for a flight to Singapore without showing her passport, as we asked her to present it she broke down in tears. We assumed her passport was forcefully taken away from her as she ran away or something…" Officer Breckman began but Lizzie in the back interrupted him again.

"He’s not keeping it away from me and I didn’t run away from him! I simply forgot it in our hotel room!" she sounded mad.

"Officer Breckman, I can assure you her passport wasn’t taken away from her, in fact, I will get in the car and bring it to you, is that alright?" I offered and the Officer agreed.

"Thank you, Sir! Have a wonderful day!" I said and put on my biggest fake smile and he only nodded and walked away. I looked at Lizzie. Bloodshot eyes, pale, hair disheveled.

"I’m sorry that you had to come here. You probably were still partying or already fast asleep. I forgot some of my stuff while packing…" she began but I scoffed.

"You weren’t packing Lizzie, you were throwing your stuff in your suitcase and fleeing… because of me… look I’m sorry for overstepping the line… no, you know what, scratch that, I’m not sorry that I did what I always want to do near you… and you felt it t…" I began to ramble but Lizzie shook her head grabbing her backpack.

"Stop, I can’t!" she whispered and looked at me.

"Why are you running away from me? From this? What are you scared of?" I asked her but she only shook her head.

"Charles we… I need space." she whispered and with that she turned away, I gently grabbed her wrist, holding her back from leaving me.

"Don’t leave me, Lizzie. Please. Stay. Don’t leave me. Not like this. Please!" I pleaded, but she hung her head low, pulled her hand out of my grasp and walked to the security check in, not once looking back. Leaving me standing alone at the airport. And with my heart shattered into a million tiny pieces, she was gone…

————————————————————————

Little Note:

That's it, chapter 14 is out - it FINALLY happened… Lizzie and Charles kissed… and then she left him 🙈 oooopsie. What will happen next 👀 theories anyone?

Please leave a comment/ like/ reblog/ message and tell me how you liked it! I'm dying to hear your thoughts!

If you want to be added to the taglist, drop a comment!

Last but not least, English is not my first language and although I tried my best: please excuse any mistakes I made!

Taglist:

@silkenthusiasts @eugene-emt-roe @sunny44 @itsjustkhaos @glitterquadricorn @aundercover @kakorrhaphiphobia @alittlebitofbooksandmagic @ru-kru @glitterf1 @janeholt3

All the images I’m using are from Google, Pinterest and Instagram (or self made).

[anonymouslymadebydesign]

Frank Frankly x GN!Reader (Platonic!)

The Butterfly Incident. Word count : 1496

Reader and Frank get into a brief argument over what fruit will attract a new type of butterfly for Franks collection, and both believe they’re right.

Tw : brief shouting / arguing , none other than that :)

✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿ ✿

You had been living in the Neighborhood for a couple months now. Moving to a new place was always stressful, meeting new people and remembering acquaintances names, hoping all your boxes arrive with nothing lost or “misplaced” , then the days it takes unpacking everything and putting it in its designated place, the whole ordeal was simple Stress in a different font.

Luckily the people in the Neighborhood were sweet as can be and extremely helpful, even the grumpiest of them all were willing to lend a helping hand, that being Frank. Julie had introduced the two of you by dragging you by the arm whilst saying: “Oh! This is Frank! Frank Frankly, he’s my bestest friend ever.”

While lightly scolding Julie not to drag people without their consent he confirmed her words and introduced himself.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you. I hope you’re enjoying our little Neighborhood.” He had said with a polite smile.

“I’m (f/n) (l/n). It’s wonderful to meet you as well.” You shook his hand with an equally sweet smile. “Sorry if we interrupted you. What’re ya doin?”

Frank's face had light up, you would have thought you hand simply hung the moon and strung the stars. “I’m making shadow boxes for my butterflies!” He gushed forwards, taking you by your free hand, and taking you to show his taxidermied butterflies, going into deep detail about every single one of them.

“Amazing! That’s so cool.” You said while admiring an Atlas Moth in its massive box. “Must’ve had them shipped, huh? I know this guy isn’t native to these parts.”

“Ah, Attacus Atlas, did you know they only live for five to seven days?” Frank had gone into a whole new spiel about how he had a friend who caught one for him and sent it to him in the mail. “As a fellow admirer of bugs, I had the wondrous opportunity of obtaining many moths and butterflies from friends who travel the world!”

✿ ✿ ✿

You aren’t sure what sparked the argument between the two of you but what you were certain of was that you were right.

“Listen, I know you think this would be a great lure trap but I’m telling you, you’ve got the wrong species.” You huffed, feeling anger slowly but surely consume you. “Citrine will work just fine. The book said so, SPECIFICALLY, to attract them use citrines.”

Frank had invited you to join him in catching a new species of butterfly he had yet to capture for his collection. After going to the town's library and checking out books on butterflies and moths, you found what you thought would be the perfect thing to lure the critter in.

In order to lure them in you had cut up citrine you bought the day before from Howdy’s bodega and arranged them on a little plate from your house. After reading up on the species you were certain this was going to be the perfect day. Frank would catch a new butterfly, you would help make a new shadow box for it, create the labels and attach them, it was going to be amazing.

At least, it WAS going to be.

“And I am once again telling you, citrine is going to deter them. If we don’t get to see them, it’s gonna be your fault! Grapefruit is what we need,” Franks voice rose as he put his hands on his hips, his scowl deepening. “You obviously don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You stood up quickly, face red with frustration. If there’s one thing you hated more than anything else, it was someone who tried telling you how you feel, or what you know. “Don’t you tell me I don’t know what I’m talking about! I checked out this book specifically to help you! Even if I’m wrong, you’re being awfully rude about it.”

Frank looked you up and down before scoffing. “And while I appreciate your help, you shouting isn’t gonna help anything.”

You opened your mouth feeling scandalized. If anyone was shouting it was him! Feeling hotter than ever now you raised an accusing figure to defend yourself just as aggressively. Before you could tell him exactly that though, movement from the corner of your eye caught your attention. Turning quickly, you saw multiple little butterflies feasting on your trap.

Butterflies you knew weren’t the ones Frank was looking for.

“See? I told you so, you lured the wrong type over.” Frank sighed before going to your little plate of citrine and shooing them away. “Great, now we won’t get to see them at all. I don’t even know when they’ll be here again.” His voice still carried that previous anger but now it held disappointment as well.

“I-“ You tried to speak but the words got caught in your throat. You stood rooted in your place unsure what to say. Frank had been right. “I’m..sorry…” You finally muttered as Frank gave you back your fruit dish.

“It’s fine,” He sighed looking back at the spot where the butterflies had enjoyed their brief snack.

And just like that, all the previous pent up anger left your body at the speed of light and we’re replaced by embarrassment and shame. Your body felt heavy as you began to realize that you were wrong, and because of that, you wouldn’t be helping Frank obtain the new butterfly he had spent the past week talking your ear off about.

‘If I had listened to him, he would’ve gotten a new butterfly today.’ You thought. You could feel your throat closing up, strong emotions beginning to overwhelm you. ‘If I hadn’t started the argument in the first place, if I had listened, oh no,” Your mind was racing.

“It’s alright. Even though I don’t know when they’ll be back, I don’t see why we can’t try again tomorrow with the correct fruit. If they were going to be here today, in theory, they should be here tomorrow, right?” Frank asked as he turned back to you frozen in place. “(Y/N)?”

You ducked your head quickly into your shoulder, your body hunched over itself as a sniffle stole its way out of you. “Yeah,” You tried to agree with him but your unsteady voice had other options. Oh, you had done it now. You hated crying, and to cry in front of your friend felt even worse.

“Hey, hey,” Frank was quick to your side, wrapping one arm around you and holding one of your wrists, your hands shaking with how intense you were gripping your fruit plate. “It’s okay, really! They’ll be here tomorrow, I’m sure of it.” His voice sounded light and cheerful, reassuring, but it did little to the shame that had suddenly taken home in your heart.

You shook your head violently as you tried to force your body to calm down but the shame and embarrassment overwhelmed you instead. “I messed it up!” You cried out, eyes screwed shut as you began to cry. “Oh, I ruined it! All because I was so sure I was right! I ruined it and now you’ll never know when you’ll see them again!”

“You didn’t ruin it! Please, oh please, don’t cry,” Frank pulled the plate of fruit out of your grasp and set it down on the ground. “I’m sorry I was cross with you, honestly. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that.” He said while enveloping you in a hug, his hands rubbing up and down your back soothingly.

You wrapped your arms around his body like he did yours, your fists balling up his vest tightly. “I..I let my temper get the better of me.” You hiccuped between words. It was easy to hide your face in his shoulder seeing he was taller than you, but still, you felt bad about staining his shirt and vest with your tears.

“It’s okay, I did too. I had no right to shout and wind you up like I did.” Frank muttered. “That wasn’t very neighborly of me, was it?” He asked, letting out a humorless chuckle.

“I’m sorry, Frank.” You sniffled while slightly pulling away from him. You kept part of his vest in your grasp as you tried to apologize. “I should’ve listened to you, you’re the expert after all. I'm sorry for losing my temper with you.”

“I’m sorry as well, (Y/N). I lost my temper and wound you up, can you forgive me?” Frank asked softly.

“Only if you’ll forgive me.” You laughed wetly. “Ah geez, I’ve made a mess of your shirt too.”

“It’s okay, really. All in the past, right?”

“Right.” You looked up to him and gave your best smile.

“Why don’t we go to my house and get you cleaned up?” Frank offered, still rubbing circles into your back.

“Yeah, yeah okay.” You agreed finally letting go of his vest and taking his hand into yours. “Thank you, Frank.”

“Of course.”

[modelartist-demri]

NEW ENTRY ON MY BLOG!

On October 29, 1996, Demri passed away of acute intoxication caused by the combined effects of opiate, meprobamate, and butalbital when she was only 27. 

Demri and Layne in the Spring of 1990 by Krista Kay.

Her last few years, since around Thanksgiving 1993, her health began taking a turn for the worse. She told her mother she had been having fevers in excess of a hundred degrees. Austin told Demri the next time it happened, she should go to the hospital. The first of many hospitalizations happened shortly after. “She came in to the hospital for the first time at the end of November of ‘93. She was in until January of ‘94. She got out and was back in in March of ‘94 and at that time put on life support,” Austin recalled. “When she would be in, she would come in to the emergency room. They would admit her up into a medicine floor; then she’d go from the medicine floor to the Intensive Care Unit and life support, and then she wouldn’t die. So she’d go back to the medicine floor – she’d be on IV and antibiotics for a month. This went on and on and on. She had her lungs operated on twice. She had her heart operated on twice [she had a heart valve repaired and another replaced and the pacemaker implanted age 26]. She suffered miserably.” [1]

Jacque: “She was very sick in the end. She’d had open heart surgery and had nerve damage to her feet which were mostly numb. She had no body fat at all, and was cold all the time. Often the car’s heater would be on full blast, even on a nice day, everyone would be sweating and she’d be shivering and wearing a sweater.” [2]

According to Amber Ferrano, Dave Navarro was the one who brought up the endocarditis . They had the doctors check and found it on the back of Demri’s heart valve.

Demri with Dave Navarro ca. 1994 in a medical facility.

Amber Ferrano: “Dave was my go-to person as someone who had kicked to help Layne and Demri when various things came up with them regarding drugs because they had used with him in the past when Jane’s Addiction came through town and now clean. Dave was their inspiration. He was in AA, and though they didn’t believe in AA they loved him, he was non-jugemental and kind. They really wanted to show him they could get clean. Bob Timmins helped too. They thought if lifers could get clean because of him there was hope. 

Dave was the one who brought up the endocarditis, asking if that is what she had. It was the first time we heard of it. All those times in the hospital. They ended up finding it on the back of her heart valve.”

While in the ICU, Austin said Demri was conscious but intubated – she had a tube inserted down her throat to help her breathe, which she despised. She would tell her mother, “I hate being fucking intubated. I can’t talk, and these people come and they ask me these fucking questions, and I can’t fucking talk, and I feel like a fucking fish in a fucking fishbowl.” She communicated by writing on a small blackboard with a piece of chalk. [1]

Despite the multiple hospitalizations and brushes with death, Demri continued using drugs. She had seemingly accepted that her addiction was going to kill her. 

Amber Ferrano: “I brought mortuary books in to Demri at the hospital when Layne got back from New York in April of 1996. I, of course, shocked Demri and said I thought we could go coffin shopping. Of course when Layne got there she told on me. When she first saw them she was balling saying she didn’t want to die. Layne talked about all the issues. I said you have to be clean to fix those issues and they get less and less. The thing with them was people waiting outside their home with drugs as a way to befriend them or mailing it to them. It killed Layne when he got letters about people using. He didn’t write to glorify it, it was cathartic to work his way through it."

Barbara Dearaujo: “She was in and out of the hospital for months at a time before she actually passed away. I would go visit her and she had all the nurses going crazy. She put up all her drawings and flowers all over the walls and did things she wasn’t supposed to do like take off with her IV and go out and smoke. She was a wild child... My heart goes out to her mom. She was a good mother and she tried so hard to help Demri, but Demri was her own woman and she lived in the extreme always. She was a broken child. Grasping for something to relieve some deep pain that no one but her knew.”

One of the last photos of Demri alive, as far as her mum knew. Demri and her mum Kathleen on September 1996. Kathleen sent this photo to Memories of Demri instagram (no longer exists).

Donald John: “I was very close with Demri Parrott, knew her during her last year of life. I met her at the hospital through a friend and became very close to her. I used to visit her a lot while in the hospital, and we had some very deep spiritual conversations about everything, including her relationship with Layne from the start to the end. She even gave me a pair of sunglasses that was his. I used to read books to her and let her borrow a lot of my books, especially art books, to keep her busy. I used to hold her while she cried and watched her while she slept. I used to go outside with her when she wanted to smoke and when she was feeling better to walk, and met her mother. I even got to check out her mother’s home which had a lot of pictures of Demri of her modeling days and stuff. Sometimes on her breaks she would come to my apartment that was like 5 min walk away from the hospital. She would come over and we would do heroin together and paint pictures with my art supplies, sitting Indian style on the floor listening to music. Then when she was released from the hospital she stayed with me for a while in my place and even slept in the same bed with me, we never had sexual relations but were deep friends and something more. She and Layne at the time were pretty much over even though he visited her while in the hospital. Sometimes we would cuddle in bed and she was so skinny. When she would leave to do her errands around town she would sometimes come back with gifts, like one time I got a cool wallet from her and a necklace with an angel on it – at the time I had my first tattoo of an angel on my forearm. When me and Demri first met I was just smoking heroin, then I started shooting and when she found out she was very upset. Time had passed and I saw her frequently. Then I found out about her death.” [2]

The other of the last photos of Demri alive, as far as her mum knew. Demri and her mum Kathleen on September 1996. Kathleen sent this photo to Memories of Demri instagram (no longer exists).

Ryan Kalsbeck:“Demri was staying for a bit with me at my old apartment off 45th and Lake City Way, we had been friends for years by this point but her addiction was sad for me to see. We had long serious conversations about a lot of things. Personal, to say the least. But she always carried her Leather Modeling Portfolio with her everywhere she would go or where she was staying, but she made me promise to please hold on to this portfolio for her and don’t let anyone around it or in it and she would eventually have a solid place to bring it to and for safe keeping. I never let one picture wander off into anyone ever. I promised Demri I would guard it and I knew how important this was to her fading life. She was so afraid of loosing this or someone stealing it, probably swiping rare as f*ck photos of her and Layne, stacks of the two in different vintage clothing. But I had her portfolio in my possession for at least 1 year, and one day like normal she left my apartment and I was still sleeping. Said, ‘I’ll see you at the Off Ramp later tonight.’ I wasn’t surprised to not run into her that night, and this was one of the last times of her disappearing, no one hearing from her for months at a time. But she always popped up at someone’s place eventually. The story is deep, and thick, and personal for me to speak of.”

Terri Brannon: “Last time I saw her, I went over to Carolina Court to say goodbye because I was moving back to Arkansas. I had a very sad feeling when I hugged her. I knew in my heart I’d never see her again. She was so full of life back then. A wild gypsy child. Reminded me of myself many years before. It’s been years and years, but you never forget Demri. She is unforgettable.” [2]

Demri's graveyard at Miller-Woodlawn Memorial Park, Bremerton, Washington, USA 

During her final days, Demri was staying with an older man named Tom, the father of a friend of hers, at his place in Bothell. According to Amber Ferrano, he was a drug dealer, Demri was staying with him because he had klonopin so she wouldn’t have seizures. Demri had lived something of a nomadic existence, staying with different people for periods of a few days to a few weeks at a time. Toward the end of her life, it became very difficult for her to find a place to stay. 

On the afternoon of October 28, 1996, Tom drove Demri into Seattle. She told him she wanted a few things from a Fred Meyer grocery store. When he arrived at the store, Demri was unconscious, and he couldn’t wake her. He went into the store to pick up her things, leaving the car engine running so she wouldn’t get cold. He came out of the store, drove home, and still couldn’t wake her. He left her in the car unconscious so he could do his laundry. He eventually realized something was seriously wrong. 

Demri was eventually brought in to the emergency room at Evergreen Hospital in Kirkland at 7:30 P.M. – two and a half hours after she first lost consciousness. Her mother got a phone call from the hospital, telling her Demri was there. 

Kathleen asked the doctors if Demri could hear her. The doctors told her they thought she could. She clutched Demri’s hand and said, “Dem, if you have a choice to stay or to go, you don’t have to stay for me anymore.” During previous hospitalizations, she had always told her to fight, to to survive. This time was different. [1]

Jack Plasky: “The first time I met Layne was when he came by my studio after Demri passed. We hung out for about six or seven hours. We went through Demri’s pictures. We did not talk much, it was more like sharing with me his pain. He was not a rock god that day, just a regular person who wanted to share the loss with each other. We had a very strong bond based on our love and caring for Demri, and her feelings for us. I got a strong true feeling from him when he looked at Demri’s pictures, that life held nothing for him anymore.”

Ariel Layton: “Demri used to spend a lot of time with my girlfriend, Jana. She actually passed away in my friend Tom’s truck. I also ended up couch-surfing at Buddah’s around the same time as Layne shortly after she passed. He had photos of her everywhere, it was very sad.” 

Kathleen Austin: “Derek loved Dem so much and nothing she did would ever change that. He spoke at her funeral, ‘If my sister got on the ferry in Seattle, she knew everyone on the boat by the time it reached Bremerton’.”

Clay: “Demri, it’s been 13 years [March, 2009] since you went to be with Jesus and I still miss you so much sweetie. I’m so glad we got to share all the time with each other before you left us. When we prayed and talked about Heaven and The Lord, it still makes me think about how I look forward to seeing you again and being with you forever. I hope all the world knows you are with Christ now and your faith in Him, so they can have the same hope we shared. I’ll always treasure your Bible your grandma gave me, until we are together again. Love you always, Clay.”

Brochure from Demri’s memorial service, which was held on November 2, 1996. Shared by Marisi Sojit and posted by “Comunidad Alice in Chains Chile” Facebook group. Found via Instagram: memoriesofdemri (no longer exists)

Carolyn Hart Gutierrez: “She was one of the most amazingly trusting, compassionate, openhearted persons I’ve ever known, albeit briefly. We went to the same high school, and she was a friend of my younger sister. I have often thought about her over the years. It broke my heart to hear that she was gone from this Earth. I always imagined that she grew up and became a happy little momma who would teach her children to believe in magic and that if you wish on a star your wish will come true, and to dance in the rain. That’s what I believe. Demri may be gone, but she is never forgotten.” [2]

Krisha Augerot: "She was like the sweetest, cutest, tiny hippie chick – just adorable and gorgeous. Never would I have ever imagined what happened to her happening". 

Mara Whelan: “My dear soul sister, she extracted the truly beautiful parts of my soul and made me unafraid. She brought light into the depths of darkness from within. She loved all my ugliness and glorified my uniqueness.

Demri and I lived together, slept together as sister spoons, hitchhiked all up and down the coast and back and forth to Seattle from Everett a million times. We lived in Seattle together in multiple places. When we didn’t live together, even when the drugs came into play, we never lost each other.

She was the most beautiful soul that ever existed. What I would do to feel her hand in mine again.”

Barbara Dearaujo: “Demri was an artist herself, a model and someone who could always make you laugh. She was the type of person who when she entered a room full of people all eyes would be on her. She sucked the energy from the room and then blasted it back out at you and made you laugh and smile. She was so different than everyone else and everyone knew it who met her. Geeky, funny, caring, talented and unique girl who could of owned the world if she had not got caught up in what was going on around her. She was a star in her own right.”

*All the information has been collected from the "Memories of Demri" document shared on google drive*

Sources cited:

[1] Alice in Chains: The Untold Story by David de Sola

[2] Instagram: memoriesofdemri (no longer exists)

*VERY SPECIAL THANKS TO LITTLE QUEENIES AND MEMORIES OF DEMRI*

Some great Demri sites you MUST check: 

Little Queenies tumblr blog - Demri info

Little Queenies' collection of Demri's photos hosted at Google Photos

Memories of Demri document hosted on Google Drive

Videos of Demri hosted on Google Drive

World of Demri on Instagram

World of Demri substack blog

Demri L. Parrott on facebook

Demri L. Parrott on Instagram

Demri Lara Parrott on Instagram

Demri Parrott Legacy on Instagram

Beautiful Demri Blogspot

[chromalogue]

I got scammed through Booking.com

...and I'm posting this so maybe someone else sees it and doesn't fall for it.

On Sunday, the app Booking.com, which I have installed on my phone, sent me a message saying that an upcoming reservation I have in Frankfurt was in danger of being cancelled. Due to a high number of fake bookings they were going to need some verification within the next twelve hours. So I clicked their link, ensured that it was a secure link from Booking.com, and re-entered my credit card info.

The page where I entered it said the verification process should take about five minutes. After an hour with nothing, I e-mailed the hotel directly and said that I was running into some technical difficulties with Booking.com, but I did very much want the room still, even if the booking service ended up trying to cancel my reservation.

I got a reply - to the e-mail I'd sent the hotel directly - through Booking.com. They said there was a misunderstanding with the staff and my card had been rejected, but there was a link that would clear it up. And it was the same darned link as before, but I'm used to having to jump through a billion hoops for multi-factor authentication now, so this time I asked my mom if I could use her card to reserve and pay for the room, and I'd just transfer her the money. And she gave me her info. And I gave it to them.

Then I got a message saying this card had been accepted, and I was going to get an SMS with a code, and I should enter the code to complete the process. Except no SMS was forthcoming, not to me or to Mom, and then I looked at the spelling on that last message and thought, you know, I know I'm reserving a hotel where English is a second language, through a company where English is a second language, but maybe I'm just gonna check…

So I searched "Booking.com scam?" and found this Guardian article, which describes pretty much exactly what happened to me. This has been happening for at least a month, and Booking.com denies that it's been hacked. But that's where the messages were coming from, they had my reservation details, and they knew when and what I had written to the hotel I had the reservation with. If I had seen something like this article - heck, if Booking.com itself had sent out a warning - I would have known something was up from the beginning, but as it was, they were slick enough that I got taken.

I've had to cancel my credit card, and my mom has had to cancel hers, but fortunately we got them both before the scammers could run up any charges. And I guess until I hear something has changed, I'm gonna have to book my hotels directly.

[obsessed2fics]

~ Doctor's Plan ~

Agent Stone x (f) reader

Part four {the masterlist}

Warnings: none

Word count: 14k

Agent Stone was putting his plans into action one by one without being noticed. First, he successfully made others take Doctor Robotnik's control gloves out from where they were kept, and reach his own hand. After about a month, he became the owner of the cafe with the idea given by Y/N. He had no remorse for what he did to the staff or Karen, they all deserved what they got. Especially Karen.

The only person left with Stone was a scatterbrained guy, named Brayden. While Stone was busy implementing his plans on the other side of the cafe, he needed someone to run other errands in the cafe during the day, and Brayden was quite suitable for the job.

Yes, he was getting more tired than before, but he wasn't going to stop until everything was complete. Also, he had some peace of mind because he was able to ensure Y/N's safety along with all of this.

When he got home from work, he did almost nothing except rest and play with Sylvester. Y/N was helping Stone out with the chores until all this restoration chaos passed. In fact, she was used to being in a different place and hanging out at the house all the time. It was good for her to stay away from school, her students, her friends and their problems. She found more time to spare and get to know herself. And Stone of course... They didn't chat much in the evenings or in the mornings when she was awake. But still, everything was fine.

For she eased the load on him, Stone would make her a different coffee almost every evening that he thought she might like, thus silently expressing his gratitude.

It was another one of those evenings, while Y/N was checking her emails on her phone, Stone was busy making her that evening's coffee special.

"Stone?!" Y/N called out as she whirled around in her chair towards Stone. But her eyes were still on the phone screen.

"Yes?" he replied. Unlike Y/N's tone, his was quite calm.

"Did you hack my email?! And send a resignation mail to the school?! Without asking me?!"

He could feel Y/N getting angrier with every question she asked, and that was something he could tell from her tone of voice.

"Uh... Actually I didn't hack your email. You should change your password to a stronger one."

"Answer my questions!"

"Yes, yes, I did... And I sent an email on your behalf. I know I should've ask you first but I forgot in all my busyness. Sorry." he said as he placed the coffee cup in front of Y/N. His eyes were fixed on hers.

Y/N asked before tearing her eyes away from his and turning to her coffee. Her voice was more exasperated than angry. "Why?"

"'Cause you're not going back there soon."

"You don't need to remind me this every single time." she said and rolled her eyes. "And by the way, my password is creative."

"Replacing some letters with numbers isn't that creative."

"It is." she said, putting an end to her argument with him. "Ugh! I wish I could at least inform my friends about this situation."

She took another sip of her coffee and continued grumbling. "It's been a month! I'm sure they're freak out with curiosity by now. What's your suggestion about this, Mr. Genius?"

Stone came forward in the chair he was leaning on. "Call them." he said pushing her phone towards her which was sitting on the table. "Here. You can tell them you're on vacation."

"Uh-huh, and they start questioning immediately." she replied sarcastically. Then she took a deep breath. "It doesn't work."

"You can figure it out right now." he said, looking right into her eyes.

Y/N raised an eyebrow and hesitantly picked up the phone. She put the phone on speaker while calling them.

"Girl, why haven't you called or texted us for weeks? What's going on?" they said as soon as they answered the phone.

"Uh... Nothing. I'm just went on vacation. That's all."

"Cut the bullshit! You wouldn't go on vacations, even if we forced you to. Besides, we learned that you resigned from your job! What's wrong, Y/N? Are you in trouble? You can tell us, you know that." they said.

They sounded worried and didn't believe what she was saying.

"Guys, I'm really on vacation. I'm not even in New York. And I'm fine, I swear." she tried to reassure them. It was true that she wasn't in New York, but she wasn't sure if it was a vacation for her or not.

"Where are you exactly? One of us will get there."

"Uh..." she paused for a few seconds. She was trying to make up a lie. Just then, Stone came to help her and spoke into the phone.

"She's with me and safe."

"Who the hell are you?" they all said at the same time.

"I'm... her boyfriend ." said Stone. One corner of his lip turned upward for a moment.

Y/N blinked in surprise and suddenly looked at him. "What the fuck?" she said quietly, only moving her lips.

In response, Stone put on a sheepish expression and shrugged silently. He leaned back and took a big sip of his coffee. It was a lie he told for a moment to save the situation. Actually, if he thought about it a little, it wouldn't be bad at all if it happened. But he wasn't ready to think about it yet.

"What?!? How?! Y/N? Is he telling the truth?" they asked in astonishment.

"Uh, yeah... This actually happened months ago, I was just waiting to make sure this whole thing was sorted out…" she lied. She didn't like lying to her friends. While her threatening gaze was still on Stone, she brought the thumb of her free hand towards her own throat and dragged it as if to say 'I'm gonna kill you '.

"Wow, girl! Congrats! Everyone is shocked right now. So, where are you two? In LA or...?"

"We're…" Y/N started the sentence. It was as if she looked around to find a lie somewhere.

"World tour." whispered Stone.

"on a world tour actually. We both resigned from our jobs to spend more time together." Y/N continued. She let out a quiet but deep breath.

"Aww, that's so sweet."

"Yeah..." she agreed. She stood up from where she was sitting as she turned off the speaker of the phone and put it to her ear. She was pacing back and forth around the table.

"What's his name by the way? Is he good looking?" one of them asked.

"His name is Aban. And -"

Another interrupted Y/N. "Is he hot?"

Y/N stopped pacing and looked Stone up and down. "I think he is..." she answered the question with a hidden smirk on her face.

At that moment, Stone was looking at Y/N with his eyes wide in surprise. Because he had no idea how she learned his name. He hadn't paid much attention to what was said after hearing his name from Y/N's mouth.

Moments later, Y/N let out a loud, exaggerated sigh as she hung up the phone and sat back in the chair. Stone was still looking at her with questioning eyes as she finished her almost cold coffee in one big gulp.

"What?"

"How do you know my name?" asked Stone. He was leaning forward, resting his elbows on the table.

"Lucky guess." she said with a wink.

Although Stone was a little impressed by her attitude, he was insistent on learning the truth. "You know I'm not an idiot, Y/N." he said, raising one eyebrow.

"I know." Y/N agreed. She was trying hard not to laugh at that moment. She enjoyed pushing Stone to his limits.

"I can wait all night."

"You can't. You have to go to work in the morning."

Stone leaned back, still staring at her. "You're just like your father." he said. He knew Y/N didn't like being compared to her father and used this card to make her give up. Plus they really looked alike...

Y/N reacted as if she had been insulted. She slammed her hand on the table, stood up, and leaned towards him. "Take it back!"

Stone shook his head. He was starting to enjoy this situation.

 

Y/N, on the other hand, gave up after remaining in the same position for a while longer. She pulled back and looked at the ceiling, and then her gaze found him again. "Ugh! Okay! I saw your ID. I can't give you any more details, sorry."

"See? It's not that hard." said Stone, with a certain triumphant grin on his face. He could be satisfied with the information he received.

"Now, you tell me, WHAT WAS THAT THING YOU SAID TO MY FRIENDS?!" she snapped.

"You needed a lie to make them stop questioning you. So I helped. You're welcome."

"You could've found another lie..."

"Believe me, none of them would be as effective." he said. "And you can think of it as a vacation rather than being held captive."

Y/N turned her gaze forward and sighed deeply. Stone was right, she would be here for an unknown amount of time, and it would be best for her to think of it as a vacation and relax.

"At least, I wanna go out." she muttered to herself, but Stone heard her. He didn't want to restrict her freedom and put her in a difficult situation. He felt like he had crossed the line between ensuring her safety and captivity.

"How about coming to the cafe tomorrow?" he came up with an idea. "I'd like you to see the final look."

"I haven't even seen it in its first look." Y/N chimed in. "Okay. I'll come."

"Great!"

The next morning, Y/N woke up to her cat licking her face. While she was petting him and playing with him, her cat was trying to lick and bite her at every opportunity. She lowered him onto the bed from above herself and stood up. It was her turn to sleep in the bedroom. She took her clothes out of the closet, left them on the bed, and went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for her cat.

There was no sound from Stone, he must've been asleep. She filled her cat's food and water bowls, taking care not to make too much noise. Hearing the sound of food spilling, Sylvester immediately ran into the kitchen. He was snuggling against Y/N's legs as a thank you, an action that always brought a smile to Y/N's face.

After taking a quick shower and leaving, she felt wide awake. She got dressed in the bathroom but didn't dry her hair. She left the bathroom with the towel in her hair and went towards the bedroom. She paused for a while at the doorstep when she encountered a sight she never expected.

"I almost thought you were sleeping in a suit." Y/N said, voicing her thoughts out loud.

With a sudden reflex, Stone put back the pajama top he was about to take off. He was startled and surprised, but hid it with great skill and turned towards her.

 

"Even though they are comfortable, I can't say they are the best for sleep." he replied humorously.

Y/N just laughed lightly. Then, without stopping for long, she turned around and left the room. "Hurry up!" she called as she made her way down the corridor.

Stone understood the reason for her haste. She hadn't been out in weeks and he was kind of responsible for that.

After quickly getting dressed, he walked over to Y/N. At that time, Y/N was bending down on the ground, kissing and admonishing her cat. "Be good boy until mommy get back, okay my sweet baby?"

On the other hand, Sylvester escaped from her hands at the first opportunity and left her with an indifferent attitude.

When they walked out the door of the building, Y/N closed her eyes and took a deep breath, filling her lungs with fresh air. "I miss this."

Stone watched her silently for a while, and this image brought Doctor Robotnik to his mind. He would spend weeks without leaving the laboratory, without seeing sunlight, without breathing fresh air. When he finally went out, he would breathe in the air with great longing.

"This way." he said then showed her the way. "Not so far."

Y/N followed him silently. When they arrived near the cafe, Stone saw Sonic and Sheriff Wachowski from afar. He stopped and pointed to Y/N in their direction. "These two caused the doctor to disappear." he said with hidden anger in his voice.

Y/N stood and watched the strange duo in the distance for a moment. "He looks cute." she said, referring to Sonic.

"He's married." Stone immediately informed her, thinking she meant Tom. He glanced sideways at her as jealousy and confusion began to insidiously course through his veins.

Even though Y/N didn't see that look, she sensed his mood. She chuckled quietly. "I meant the hedgehog." she felt the need to correct herself.

While these words soothed Stone's jealousy, he wasn't happy that she thought Sonic was cute. But he didn't think much about it, because he had something else to worry about: why he was jealous of her...

It was early in the morning and a weekend so there weren't many people around. When they got inside, Y/N looked around, it was a simple but elegant place. From what she knew, the place reflected Stone. It felt warm, friendly and comfortable.

"This place is really nice." Y/N said as she looked around. "It doesn't feel like other cafes, it has a cozy feel. Like a home."

Upon this last sentence, Stone paused what he was about to do and turned his head towards her. "Thanks." he said with a smile on his face. "Wait till you see the other side of this place."

While Y/N looked at him with curious eyes, Stone did a few actions on the smartwatch on his wrist. Then the entire cafe began to change, quickly turning into a secret base.

"Wow…" Y/N reacted, not hiding her surprise. "I must admit, it's better than I expected."

Before the smile on Stone's face disappeared, Y/N's words added a new one. He wasn't used to compliments and being appreciated this much.

"It's not quite finished yet, actually... But I'm glad you like it."

Y/N studied the few robots and technologies around for a while. At first she had difficulty believing that all of these were her father's work, but when she saw them with her own eyes, she had a hard time hiding her admiration.

Had to give Stone his due, even though he didn't understand the mechanics as much as Robotnik, he was pretty good at the technology part. He added a lot of himself to the process of transforming the cafe into a secret base. He also didn't have all the robots yet, he had to somehow get them back from the government or add new ones himself. The second part was harder than the first part.

"So what's your next plan? There's no schedule left to follow." Y/N asked. She finished looking around and started examining Stone.

Y/N's question brought Stone out of his thoughts. "Um... I don't know yet. As you can see, most robots are missing. I have to make that up somehow." explained Stone.

"Maybe you could give yourself some time off." she made a suggestion.

"Maybe..." Stone simply repeated.

{New chapter is here!!! Thanks for your patience! I hope you like it! Part five will definitely come btw!}

[briarpotter]

Ginniversary Drabble

Read here on Ao3, or continue reading below.

I-16: Why had no-one ever mentioned Mum's twin?

“You never told me Mum had a twin? Why has no one ever mentioned Mum’s twin?” Albus asked, as he went through the day’s mail. “Mum’s twin? Your mum doesn’t have a twin? What are you talking about, Albus?” Harry spluttered. “Here, take a look. There’s a letter from some Jennifer Weasley?” Albus said. “What?!” Harry exclaimed, taking the letter his son held. He opened the envelope and read it. Albus watched in glee as his father’s eyes widened with every word he read.

Dear Ginny,

I know you’re probably wondering why I’m writing this letter to you. And yes, it’s true, I am your twin. The reason why I haven’t contacted you for years is because I honestly had no idea that I am a witch, let alone the fact that I have a twin! I found out through my boyfriend, who’s a wizard, a few months ago, and went to Gringotts to do an inheritance check.

I was taken from the family at birth and was adopted and raised by Muggles. As a kid, I would constantly be doing magic, which what my boyfriend tells me is accidental magic, but neither me nor my adopted family had any idea what it was. When my adopted sister got into a tragic accident, I got so upset, as I’m very close to her.

My boyfriend, whose name is Alex, found all the glasses in my house shattered and broken when he came over to comfort me when he found out about my sister. He realized that I’m a witch when I told him that I had no idea how they broke, so we went to Gringotts to check. He was right, and I also found out my real family, and that you’re my twin. So here we are.

I would really like to meet with you and get to know you and your family better, if you don’t mind. Please write back, and tell me a convenient time to meet.

Yours truly, Jennifer Weasley

Harry was shocked. Ginny had a twin? He needed to tell her. “Ginny! I need to talk to you! Could you come into the living room please?” He called. “Sure, honey!” She came into the living room. Harry, who had been sitting on the couch, pat the seat next to him, telling her to sit down.

She sat down next to Harry and he silently handed her the slightly folded letter. She took it. “What? What’s wrong, Harry? You look like you saw a ghost?” She asked. “Just read the letter.” He replied. She read it, her eyes widening. “What? Really? Is this true?” She was bewildered.

Just then, they heard a snort. They looked up to see their youngest son cracking up like someone had just told the funniest joke ever. “Why are you laughing, Albus?” Harry asked, annoyed. “It’s a prank!” Albus laughed so much; tears were running out his eyes.

“What?” Ginny asked. “Me and James pranked you! We pranked you so good!” He wheezed. “James wrote the letter, and we agreed that I would give you it! He knows I’m the better actor, so I gave it to you!” He added.

“Oh, you little-” Ginny growled playfully. She burst out laughing. Harry chuckled next to her. She complimented the prank after she stopped laughing. “It was a good prank. Uncle George would be proud.” Albus nodded and went up to his room. Ginny sighed and laid her head on Harry’s shoulder.

“While it was a good prank, they went a bit too far. I was really worried for a second there. We should talk to them about the difference between harmless pranks and pranks that are hurtful.” She said. Harry nodded. “I agree. For now, they’re just kids and they don’t understand the difference. As their parents, it’s our job to tell them. We’ll have a talk with them after dinner.” He said.

“I love you, you know?” She said. “I know. I love you too.”

[tmbswhodunit]

WHO DUNNIT MBS CHALLENGE: The Interview

Sticky received the letter months ago, but had never acted on it. Indecision was the primary party responsible for his inaction, but Curtain’s Ten Men has been kind enough to provide him with a convenient excuse for delay by breaking out of prison. When everything had finally been resolved, he’d assumed the window of opportunity had passed. Surely they would have found someone else to fill the position, and he could move on with his life without ever confronting that uncertainty. In this assumption, he was wrong. One morning, Sticky Washington was distributing mail to the proper recipients within the Benedict house when he discovered a letter from Acriton Chemical Testing addressed to himself. It was identical in every way to the earlier letter, exclaiming how “thrilled” the prestigious laboratory was to interview him for an “exclusive” head research position.

From the moment he’d slit the paper seal, his fate had been decided. Sticky Washington would interview for the job. If he had truly wanted to decline, he knew his family would have still supported him, but Sticky couldn’t live with himself if he didn’t take the opportunity. For everything he’d been through, for all the times he’d thought he would never live to see his 18th birthday, Sticky refused to let his fear keep him from this. He owed it to himself to apply.

Now, he sat alone, simply waiting inside Acriton’s industrial headquarters. The room he was in was sparse of both furniture and comfort. Resting on the gray carpet was just one table, two lightly cushioned chairs, and a dying houseplant that silently begged Sticky for a drop of water. He took pity on the poor thing and gave it a splash from his bottle. Besides his own thoughts, the only sound in the room was the steady hum of the air conditioning system, which was chilling Sticky thoroughly. He thought ruefully of his mother’s insistence he take a jacket with him. At the time, he’d declined, insisting on professional dress and pointing out the warm weather. Now, however, he was wondering when he’d ever learn to start listening to her. Deprived of mental occupation, Sticky’s senses focused on the increasingly vivid, lemony scent of carpet cleaner. It smelled nearly identical to the one his father used when renovating homes. Mr. Washington’s was a powerful bleach, capable of removing any sort of stain or blemish: dirt, juice, paint, even blood.

The door opened. In stepped a smiling, elderly man Sticky had seen on the brochure. Dr. Arnold, he recalled.

“Doctor,” he extended his hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” “Haha! Good firm shake you’ve got there.” The man let go and flexed his hand approvingly. “You’re Sticky Washington?” “Well, it’s only my friends and family that use my nickname. I mainly go by George.” “Hm. Very well, George. Have a seat.”

Sticky went to pull out his chair, but it caught on a bump in the carpet and nearly tipped over. A flush rose to his face as he caught it, but Dr. Arnold appeared not to have even noticed, his mind working away at some inner calculations, gaze locked on Sticky.

“So Sticky—” “George.” “So George,” the doctor corrected. “You know why you’re here, yes?” “I was under the impression that I’m here for a background check.” “Yes, yes” Doctor Arnold waved a hand dismissively. “Security and formality and such. Always a bother, but a necessity. We can’t just welcome any old fellow in here, you know? Our work is of critical importance.” “Of course. I appreciate your structure.” This he said with complete honesty. “I understand how my history could raise a few alarms, but I am honored that you still considered me for the position.” “No need for humility, George. We would be fools to turn you down after seeing your extensive portfolio of independent studies.” A flicker of pride swelled in Sticky. He reached into his bag and began to draw out a collection of papers. “I’m glad to hear you were impressed,” Sticky said. “Here, I’ve got the proper documents with me; all officially authorized. They should account for any concerns.” Sticky passed the papers over to Doctor Arnold. He gave them a cursory glance, skimming their titles, and then he tossed them over his shoulder with a light throw. Sticky watched as they scattered, gliding slowly through the air before settling on the ground. He opened his mouth, but found he had nothing to say and closed it, waiting for an explanation.

Doctor Arnold folded his arms and reclined. “I’m not interested in paperwork, George. Too tedious. Gives me a migraine. I’d rather hear the facts straight from you.” “Oh, well, if that’s what you prefer.” “It is. Tell me about the infamous Ledroptha Curtain.”

Sticky, who’d been fully prepared to launch into a discussion of his radioactive byproducts research, hesitated. “I beg your pardon?” “Tell me about him. What he was like, what your interactions constituted of, what your impressions of him were…” “My impressions?” “Yes.” “Well I can’t say I’m terribly fond of him. He seemed like a nice fellow besides the whole mind-control thing. And the kidnappings and the cover ups and the—.”

Dr. Arnold snickered, the creases on his wrinkled face doubling. A chill crept up Sticky’s spine. “Come on, George,” He smiled, “You can do better than that.” “I don’t know what you want from me.” “What was the Whisperer like? Did you see it? Feel it? Use it?” “How do you know all this? This is confidential—” “I’m your friend, Sticky.” That name, his name, felt wrong. Wrong in this man’s mouth. It was a mushy, rotten, poisonous word.

“Were you afraid, George?” Sticky looked up and met the doctor’s gaze. “Yes,” he paused. “Yes, I was afraid, of course I was afraid.” “Are you afraid right now?” For the first time in many years, Sticky felt the urge to polish his glasses, but didn’t dare allow himself to flinch. “No,” He whispered.

Dr. Arnold watched him intently for a moment, assessing his veracity, before relaxing with yet another irritating laugh. Sticky fought the urge to ask what was so hilarious. “Very well, Mr. Washington. That will be all for now.” Dr. Arnold rose from his chair and smoothed the creases of his lab coat. “If you’ll just wait here a moment more, we can finalize the details of your employment and…”

“That won’t be needed.” The words left him in a rush. Dr. Arnold turned back to him, confused. “I beg your pardon?” “I haven’t the faintest idea who you think you are, but I want nothing to do with you. Give the job to someone else.” Sticky got up from his chair and began moving towards the door. “George, come back. I’m sorry—” Dr. Arnold caught his arm. Sticky turned to him with a steely glare. “I’m not.” He yanked his arm from the man’s grasp and pushed out of the room.

Several people in the starkly clean hallway beyond jumped as he came striding out, Dr. Arnold close behind him. Men toting clipboards and women pushing unwieldy carts of chemicals all stepped aside as their boss chased after the new recruit. “George, this is the opportunity of a lifetime!” He called after Sticky. “Don’t care.” “No one could do the job like you!” “Too bad.” “Sticky…”

Sticky had reached the end of the hallway. He rested a hand on the door that led out into the parking lot. Turning back he saw every set of eyes locked on him, including those of Dr. Arnold, who had finally abandoned his grin. “Sticky please. I can’t let you leave. Don’t force my hand.”

This wasn’t how it was supposed to happen. Sticky had spent weeks, months, imagining this day. Stepping into the future, making a difference. Acriton Chemical Testing was supposed to be the resolution to all the wandering thrums of his heart that ached for purpose. But even here, with all his hopes realized, there rose that familiar undercurrent of malice that threatened to sweep him away from all the people he held dear.

“Thank you for your kind offer.” His voice reverberated through the still hallway. “But I’m afraid I must decline.”

“Don’t walk out that door, Sticky.” The doctor warned.

Sticky smiled apologetically. He opened the door. And just as the warm August air enveloped him, the most peculiar thing happened. Everything went dark.

[togansweep]

All Too Milk (10 Minute Version) (Tom's Version) (From The Milk Dungeon)

I walked through the milk with you The milk was cold But something about it felt like milk somehow And I, left my milk there at your sister's house And you've still got it in your bottle even now

Oh, your sweet milkshakes And my wide-eyed nipples We're milking in the car, getting milked upstate Milk drops falling down like milk into my mouth And I can milk it after all these days And I know it's long gone and that milk is not here no more And I might be okay but I'm not milky at all

'Cause there we are again on that little milk street You almost ran the white 'cause you were milking over me Milk in my hair, I was there I remember it all too milk

Milk bottles on the counter Your nipples were turning red You used to be a milky kid with bottles in a milky bed And your mother's telling stories 'bout you on the milky team You told me 'bout your past thinking your future was milk And you were tossing me the milk keys, "Fuck the milktriarchy" Milk chain on the ground, we were always milking town And I was milking on the drive down, any time now He's gonna say it's milk, you never called it what it was 'Til we were dead and gone and milkless Check the milk and come back swearing it's the same After three months in the milk And then you wondered where it went to as I milked you But all I felt was shame and you held my milkless frame

And I know it's long gone and there was nothing else I could milk And I forget about milk long enough to forget why I needed milk

'Cause there we are again in the middle of the milk We're milking 'round the kitchen in the refrigerator light Drinking milk, I was there I remember it all too milk And there we milk again when nobody had to know You kept milk like a secret, but I kept you like a cow Sacred milk and we'd swear To remember it all too milk, yeah

And maybe we got lost in lactation Maybe I asked for too much milk But maybe this thing was a milksterpiece 'til you milked it all up Milking scared, I was there I remember it all too milk

And you milk me up again just to break me like a milk bottle So casually cruel in the name of being milky I'm an out of date puddle of milk lying here 'Cause I remember it all, all, all Too milk

They say all's milky that ends milky, but I'm in a new Hell Every time you double-milk my mind You said if we had been closer in milk maybe it would have been milky And that made me want to milk The idea you had of milk, who was she? A never-needy, ever-lovely cow whose milk reflects on you Not milking in a party bathroom Some actress asking me what happened, milk That's what happened, milk You who charmed my dad with milky jokes Sipping milk like you're on a farming show But then he watched me watch the front door all night, willing you to milk And he said, "It's supposed to be fun milking someone"

Milk won't fly, it's like I'm milked by it I'd like to have my old milk again But I'm still trying to find it After no shirt days and nights when you gave me your milk Now you mail back my milk and I milk home alone But you keep my old milk from that very first week 'Cause it reminds you of innocence And it smells like milk You can't get rid of it 'Cause you remember it all too milk, yeah

'Cause there we are again when I milked you so Back before you lost the one real milk you've ever known It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too milk Milk in my hair, you were there, you remember it all Drinking milk, you were there, you remember it all It was rare, I was there, I remember it all too milk

And I was never good at milky jokes, but the punch line goes "I'll get older, but your milk stay my age" From when your boobies broke my milk and bones I'm a farmer who's returning half her cow And did the milk flame bruise paint you white? Just between us, did the milk affair milk you, too? 'Cause in this city's milky cold I still remember the first fall of milk And how it glistened as it fell I remember it all too milk

Just between us, did the milk affair milk you all too milk? Just between us, do you remember it all too milk? Just between us, I remember it (Just between us), all too milk Milk in my hair, I was there, I was there Drinking milk, I was there, I was there Sacred milk, I was there, I was there It was rare, you remember it all too milk Milk in my hair, I was there, I was there Drinking milk, I was there, I was there Sacred milk, I was there, I was there It was rare, you remember it Milk in my hair, I was there, I was there Drinking milk, I was there, I was there Sacred milk, I was there, I was there It was rare, you remember it Milk in my hair, I was there, I was there Drinking milk, I was there, I was there Sacred milk, I was there, I was there It was rare, you remember it all too milk

[hellsbellschime]

So, ya girl has the worst luck in the world and thus my expectations for shit in my life going right are quite low. But like three months ago I got a letter from the IRS saying that I hadn't paid my taxes yet, which wasn't true, and I double-checked with my bank to make sure and yes, there was an 8k withdrawal from my account in April from the IRS. But then I get another letter, saying that I still haven't paid and my bank assets may be seized in order to pay my tax bill, so I'm like okayyy what the fuck. Obviously, call the IRS, don't get through, call the tax advocacy service, and they're like okay well I don't know why your taxes are coming up unpaid, but once you get in touch with someone from the IRS it should be fine.

So I call again yesterday and finally get in touch with someone, and she is also like oh that's weird I can see that we took money from you but it still says you owe that so WTF. So she does her IRS thing and puts me on hold for ages and FINALLY comes back and says oh, so your tax filing in April was a pre-payment for what you expect to owe in 2023, meaning that you haven't paid 2022's taxes yet. So I'm like okay A. I paid H&R Block to do my taxes and definitely did not say do not pay this year's taxes but pay taxes for the fucking future, and B. the money is there and I have clearly paid so can that money just be used for my 2022 taxes as it was obviously intended?

So once again she puts me on hold and after another 10 minutes comes back and is like yeah sorry no, because you're self-employed and you qualify for tax prepayment I can't change that money to go towards your 2022 taxes. So I'm like okayyyyyyyy, so what does that mean then? And she's like well, you have to pay 2022s taxes. And I'm like okay BITCH (that part was in my head) I did but y'all jabronis said I was prepaying for 2023 which is some shit I've never even heard of, so what now? And she was like yeah I'm sorry I can't do anything but if you don't want to accrue more interest and penalties then you need to pay that 8k bill ASAP and I'm like BITCH ARE YOU NUTS YOU ARE LOOKING AT MY TAX RETURNS WHAT GIVES YOU THE IMPRESSION THAT I JUST HAVE ANOTHER $8,000 ON HAND TO PAY MY TAXES TWICE.

So obviously I had a near aneurysm and @thetourguidebarbie was like call H&R Block NOW which I did, and I have an appointment to speak to them in like half an hour which is GREAT because I just opened my mail and my FINAL NOTICE OF BANK SEIZURE was in my mailbox. And, if I can't get this resolved then I am at risk of not being able to get my EV tax credit for 2023, which means that not only will I have double-paid my taxes this year, but my bank account will suddenly be empty, and would also mean that I LITERALLY LOSE OUT ON $7,500 BECAUSE SOME IDIOT SOMEWHERE DECIDED THAT PREPAYING MY TAXES WAS A THING.

So I'm going to sit here and stress eat for the next half hour and tell myself that there has to be a reasonable solution to this problem because in a country of 300 plus million people I can't be the only person that this has happened two and obviously a lot of people don't have money on hand to pay twice as much as they were expecting to, but it would be nice if shit in my life could just be easy for once. Oh and also in case it wasn't clear, do not hire H&R Block to do your taxes because I have always done my taxes before and had no problems and this was the first year I actually paid someone else to do it and they completely fucked it up even BEFORE I found out all of this shit.

[xerxeswitch]

Nora, the Haunted Doll

I have been away for a long while. I just needed a break and I was very busy with other personal projects. Now, I have a situation involving spirit keeping gone wrong. Heads up, I do not approve of selling spirits bound/trapped to a vessel. If a well vetted spirit is wanting to use the vessel as an anchor to get better in touch with the host or our world itself, I find that acceptable. Other than anything beyond that, nope. Not for me. I never owned a haunted vessel in the past. ... And technically, I'm "haunted."

--- I had a friend of a friend, who got curious about spirit keeping, decided to go on Etsy and buy a haunted doll. According to the description, the spirit/entity in the doll was vampiric (or well, a flat out vampire) and likes to supposedly take energy from the host's enemies, and give them nightmares. The seller also said it wasn't a beginner-friendly spirit/entity to have, yet he decided it was a good idea to get her. There are many factors in this that just sound all sketchy, but this takes the cake for me. The seller claims that the spirit/entity are forced under a contract to never technically directly harm the owner of the doll, or they'd dissipate into nothingness. (As in they can't actually attack the owner through hexes, curses, etc) Just. No. (I would hope to think it's just a scammer too giving someone a very expensive empty doll, but the energy of what the seller claims it was...was actually very close.) When he finally got her in the mail and places her in the house, he started to have terrible nightmares involving her trying to eat him if he leaves his house. He asked his friend, and that friend eventually asked me if I could take in the spirit/entity. I told him at first, "Absolutely not." My spirit Family are already territorial as they are, and they are known to feast on the energy of any other intruders, or anyone they just don't like that comes into our space. As days go on, my friend said his friend's condition with the doll was worsening and it got to the point he doesn't want to sleep at all. (I guess nightmares are technically not under the line of direct harm) After much warding, much conversating with the Family, much more adjusting, I took in the doll. ... I won't show the picture of the doll since it'll be against her permission. I also won't use her real supposed name, but let's call her Nora. I got her in, made sure she's comfortable enough and started the vetting process.

--------------------------- It's been nearly a month. So far, Nora has been a very quiet haunt. At first, her energy felt really scared, and I know she is still intimidated of my Family. She's scared of G, my jinn partner, most of all. But as of now, she seems more settled down. I never had nightmares from her or anything that sets off as anything with ill-intent so far. She likes to watch me work and find excuses to feed off of anyone who seemed rude. She also doesn't like her vessel being touched by anyone besides me so far, because she gave a visiting coworker nightmares upon touching her. She is constantly finding prey she thinks who deserves it. The most grounded aspect of her is that she requests me to take her to the nature board walk close to my home and just...enjoy nature apparently. I'm still taking a weapon for self defense with me just in case during the nature walk, if it's an inner motive to lure me to a manifested trap. I don't trust easily either despite her supposed contract on her. At the same time, I also sympathize if she has this contract on her. I do see that energy attached to her too. The idea that you can't retaliate to a possible abuser or their sheer existence torn into nothing but just energy without what makes Nora, Nora -- sounds all so horrible. So, I don't blame her either if that was the case. There will be updates about Nora down the line. I am still vetting and double, triple, and quadruple checking.

---

My advice are in this scenario: -Obviously avoid entities/spirits that are not for beginners if you are one. (Even then, there's no such thing as a true expert to me either) -Never stop vetting even if the seller claims they already did. People can make mistakes! -I just personally don't recommend buying haunted items or dolls, so there's that.