#if you fail you go spaces back and repeat with that task

[bucksgettinbi]

pls ignore, dream journal

it's 5:15 am, ive not slept outside of the hour or so the dream took. took meds has usual (at 1 am). had a greasy dinner (spätzliuuflauf)

[satoruoo]

"you're doing it wrong, baby."

the man before you only huffs in annoyance, a pout forming on his glossed lips. you stifle a laugh as he sulks, his fingers working to untie the sad excuse of a bow that held your heel in place.

"let me try again," satoru half pleads from between your legs, "i promise i'll get it right this time."

in truth, you're enjoying the view of your boyfriend kneeling at your feet while he attempts to tie your lace-up heels. your foot is strategically placed between his legs, pretty white-painted toenails on display as he tries and fails to correctly strap up your shoe.

hell, he's kneeling in a tailored suit, and it's messing with your brain.

you're going on a date tonight - it's a fancy restaurant that satoru's been dying to try out. it'd been a pain in the ass to pick out an outfit, not because you lacked clothes, your boyfriend ensured your wardrobe was always filled to the brim with the latest fashion. no, rather, it was because he insisted you wear matching outfits.

his problem, however, was your choice of shoe. your favourite pair of black lace-up heels was your pick for the evening. he'd asked to do them up for you and you thought it was going to be a 30-second thing.

you've now been sitting here for 10 minutes.

"what the fuck is this shit?" he mumbles to himself, irritated. "why is this so complicated??"

another attempt and he's given up, leaning back a fraction to critique his work. horrible, as expected.

you laugh as satoru sighs loudly, leaning his head on the exposed skin of your thigh in exasperation. his white locks tickle your flesh, and you take it upon yourself to rake your manicured nails through his hair, fingertips scratching his undercut affectionately.

you think he's adorable like this - absolute putty in your hands. he nuzzles into your skin, leaving soft kisses on the plush of your thigh as you dutifully work your fingers over his scalp.

"how about i do one, and you can watch and do the other?" you suggest.

he perks up quickly, icy blue irises sparkling. he nods, a beaming smile settling on his lips. he shifts his weight and leans back to give you space.

"so, you take these, 'round the back, and twist, then under and wrap around the ankle, twist one more time, and - boom!" you finish tying the bow on the back of your calf and smile.

satoru's eyebrow raises immediately, an expression half of disgust and half of confusion finding its place on his features. he squints at you, "you expect me to do that?"

"precisely," you respond with a smug grin.

there's a subtle challenge in your answer, and satoru drinks it like water. a challenge? he'll do it, easy. he switches your feet, sticking his tongue out as he focuses on his task.

you're watching him, amused by the way his brows furrow in concentration as he repeats the steps. around, the straps are crossed around your foot. twist, the straps are twisted. under, the straps are hooked beneath the heel. wrap, the straps are crossed and taken around your leg. twist.

he's done it. a fast learner, indeed.

you can't help the way your lips curve into a smile, applauding his efforts. his crystalline eyes are on you again - how could they not be? you're nothing short of gorgeous in that dress - pleading for some kind of praise.

"thanks, babe." you say, bending to place a kiss on his collarbone.

(he hopes to god there's a lipstick stain there so he can show everyone in that restaurant who he belongs to.)

satoru, being the most amazing boyfriend out there, helps you get on your feet, hand resting on the small of your back as he guides you from your apartment to his car.

"you look stunning tonight, love." he says while grinning like a lovestruck fool as you slip into the passenger seat.

"i know," you answer, shooting him a smile that gets him weak in the knees, "you picked the dress, after all."

you were going to be the death of him.

tagging: @sad-darksoul

[lxvvie]

A relationship with Ghost would consist of the following (and here's the sequel!):

Being mutually attracted to each other but it's 98012334823 years before you make things official.

Price, Gaz, and Soap essentially going "FINALLY!" and welcoming you to the group with open arms because it's about damn time Ghost found some happiness of his own.

You and Johnny double-teaming Ghost to poke fun at him.

Realizing that Ghost actually has a pretty wicked albeit deadpan sense of humor. You can especially see it with Soap. Can and does encourage Soap to do the thing rather bluntly because he and Gaz have a betting pool going.

Simon being your silent but everpresent protector whenever he's with you. He likes to be in the background observing his surroundings. His eyes never leave your form, though.

Finding out he's quite the handyman. Simon likes keeping his hands busy.

Giggling and/or guffawing whenever he says the word knobhead or taco.

Never failing to become flustered at the way he looks at you. Simon emotes with his eyes more than anything. His gaze is powerful.

Learning to interpret his grunts. They actually vary depending on his mood.

Ghost having to buy boxer briefs (men's boxers are friggin' COMFORTABLE, you hear me?!) and hoodies more than usual because you almost always take his old ones. He doesn't mind as much as you think he does. In fact, he likes it when you wear his clothes. He just won't ever say it. Much. He will, however, show you how much he likes it...

Realizing that for all his size, Simon moves in silence. You've lost count of the number of times he's scared you.

Ghost having no problems entertaining you, especially when it comes to random ass conversations. Some of his responses, especially when said in a deadpan tone, are unintentionally hilarious.

Never failing to be impressed by the way he can multi-task, especially when you're talking to him. You tested it once because you thought he wasn't listening. He was. He repeated the last thing you said to him verbatim. Oh.

(Referencing this post) Ghost knowing he's in hot shit when you call his full name, complete with a middle name that changes every. fucking. time. To date, he is Simon Marie Amadeus Atherton Riley. Soap caught the Marie part and now he has the rest of 141 convinced that's Ghost's middle name.

Ghost learning the importance of self-care. Whenever he's in hot shit, it's almost always because he's pushing himself or won't allow himself the opportunity to rest.

Giving each other space when necessary. Ghost absolutely needs space to decompress when he gets home and afterward, you two are inseparable.

Using each other as human pillows. Whereas Johnny becomes The Soapurrito™, Simon tends to sploot on top of you. Especially when he's dead tired.

Texting him random ass questions and depending on the answer, Simon is yet again in the doghouse.

Talking about potential tattoos he can get. He shot down the idea of getting your name tatted on his lower back because... no.

[lovers-rck]

little drabble about ellie and reader as the lady and the tramp (we all know who is the tramp)

☆

"c'mon" ellie says, a greasy fry resting between her lips "get the fry"

you frown your eyebrows, but direct your hand towards ellie's lips anyways. she moves before you could grab the fry in her mouth "not like that"

"with your mouth" she continues. you look at her, your hands leaving the keyboard of your computer

"what?"

"get it" ellie moves the fry between her lips, making faces to encourage you to do as she wants "c'mon"

"we aren't in the lady and the tramp ellie" you say, rolling your eyes and turning your attention back to the computer, resuming your task.

the light in your dorm is dim, you can hear people coming and going down the hall, talking about exams and subjects, complaining about teachers and longing for vacations.

"i know" ellie says, swallowing the potato and spinning around in the swivel chair "perhaps, they ate spaghetti, not fryes"

you smile slightly at the clarification. ellie had come to your dorm about 20 minutes ago, complaining about how hard her last assignment was and how her professor hated her, emphasizing the fact that she was sure it was because of that one time she fought with him in the middle of a debate. and with a tapper of fryes under her arm.

"i stole them from the kitchen" she told you when you asked, her lips in a pout and her eyebrows furrowed.

"cmon, get it" she repeated, placing another chip in her mouth "just for fun. i'll give you 20 bucks."

you looked back at her. you considered it for a moment, knowing that ellie wouldn't stop bugging you until you did, and you really needed to finish this assignment in time for your exam.

And something about being so close to her mouth made your stomach tingle.

"okay" you say, giving in to those puppy dog eyes "you are so weird".

she smiles "i know"

"I only do it for that 20 bucks" you reply, pulling your chair closer to ellie. but you knew that ellie didn't have 20 dollars. not even 5.

ellie rolls her eyes and nods, inviting you to proceed.

you try to think about how this is not normal behavior between friends as you move towards her mouth and feel the air from her breath against your face. the fry separates you and her by about 8 centimeters, so there is a bit of space between your faces, though not enough to avoid a nervous twitch in your stomach.

as your lips are about to grab the greasy chip, ellie pulls back, preventing you from catching it "ellie!" you exclaim, watching as ellie laughs uproariously.

"sorry, sorry!" she says, feeling your hand push her and almost knock her off the swivel chair "i had to do it. i'm sorry. now i'm serious."

when ellie gets back into her normal position, you move yourself to get close to her face again, trying to avoid the way ellie's eyes are staring at you with utmost attention, piercing your pores.

as your teeth are about to hunt for the food, ellie is quick and puts the whole chip in her mouth, causing you to stumble and end up with your lips on hers.

you feel ellie's salty lips against yours, greasy and warm. she rushes to rest her hand on your jaw, preventing you from pulling away from her but still giving you the chance to do so if that's what you want.

but you don't.

you reciprocate her kiss, which is not a kiss as such, as your lips only remain against each other for a few seconds, without moving, before they separate.

things are silent for a few seconds. you lick your lips, feeling the taste that ellie left you.

"we could agree that this is the modern version of lady and the tramp" ellie says, a playful tone tinges her voice and you can't help but giggle, feeling a warmth come over your cheeks.

"you idiot" you reply

ellie laughs and places another fry in her mouth "you didn't get it. try again".

you smile and move in again. the game goes on for five more rounds, five rounds where you fail to catch the fry and five rounds where you end up kissing ellie.

[ykiwrite]

next act

description: last thing on your mind was helping the actress calm down after the interview or emotional support for celebrities was not listed in the job description

warnings: anxiety, attempt at comfort by writer

words: 1.5k

*requested by anon <3

Breathe.

Come on, in and out just like they said.

"And how do you feel about that?"

The question flew by. Escaped Jenna's wariness snakelike. Her mind was still lingering on the former answer. The answer was not good, right? Audience gives it away. Hundreds of people give it away.

Her eyes did laps back and forth in the room. Dozens of faces were boldly laughing at something that was not intended to pass as a joke. No one cared about the interviewer in the first place. Each one of them came for her and only her. It made her painfully aware.

Each and every move, gesture, word and mistake was under the microscope. Filmed, posted an hour later, if not earlier. Maybe even now. Spotlights above we're targeting her perfectly by force while the crowd of complete strangers with a fixation on her were hiding beneath the unlit veil.

Positions didn't seem equally matched and it was apparent.

How was she not used to this already?

It took a mutter from the neighbouring seat for Jenna to discern how agonizingly quiet the hall was which clashed with her mind. Not so slumber, unlike this setting. The mass was anticipating and eyes were boring holes from the side.

Putting all of her trust in her shaky hands to raise a microphone while begging her mind to recall the question. Latter task failed terribly.

"Sorry, can you repeat the question? I was just—" scrambled Jenna before it was suppressed by another flood of laughter. Except for this time, she kept her focus on the missed question, not the sidelines.

"I was adding on to the question from before about that scene. How did you feel about it?"

"Thank you for being here with us. It was an honor to have you and with that said..."

Thank god. Exit doors were opening, spotlights were getting dimmer, curtains were pulling back and there was room to breathe. Jenna might have stood up too quickly but she could not bother. Not when she could feel her composure on the verge of collapse. The only silver lining was the lack of backstage meetings. That would be a challenge to endure.

The crew that pushed the curtains back for her quickly recited the scripted guide where she's off to next. Series of useless information was fired in her ear as if she wasn't capable of getting around herself. No praise was heard, no "good job" said, nothing.

"Yeah, yeah, i got it," Jenna uttered fiercly, feeling her voice giving up just like that. Her hand reflexively went to halt the tears from falling and ruining the looks considering she wasn't in the best mood to be scrutinized. On top of it all, her breathing caught pace and she felt trapped in this space.

"Also one more thing. When you're done with that, we have it arranged for you—"

"Are you okay?" A feathery touch on Jenna's shoulder startled and stopped her in tracks. She didn't have a chance to catch a sight of the person with the way man's presence was parallel with her each step. But the question that interrupted was worth it.

You read the room straight away and covertly signaled the man to leave. Emotional support of celebrities was not listed in the job description but you were assured you could do it better than anyone else here. Well-informed how demanding the profession must be, you figured the best call was to be yourself and go with the idea that first turned up in your mind.

Surely no one wanted nor deserved mediocre and half assed support. Especially her who is probably tired of insincere interactions in the line of work. And also the one who was observing you from the beginning. The stranger you were that saved the day but Jenna didn't know it yet.

Fixing your posture to look somewhat presentable although that was arguably the last care on Jenna's mind in a state like this, you just said, "Need a spare room?"

Jenna was once again led down the stifling backstage corridors while you searched for the room caught empty minutes before.

"Aha. It's this one. No one should use it for the time being." Jenna looked over to you hoping you'd catch the hint of thankfulness that wasn't expressed verbally.

White polished doors with numbers scribbled on them were pushed open for her to enter. You stepped in flicking some of the lights on mindfully so.

The actress passed your side like she was ordered to tiptoe. Then again you thought not to push the buttons further. You watched her secure a couch usually used for meetings and whatnot. Her whole figure was hunched and crumpled. Gaze aimed at the floor. The trembling did not cease which made you rock back and forth on one foot. Hesitating between leaving or staying. How much of a helping hand can you even be right now? The two somebodies that passed eachother by pure accident, knowing nothing about eachother and one is now ready to risk the job over it.

"Uh, in case you need anything i'm working around the stage for the next hour," you added hopefully but met with silence for response.

"Unless...?" Every plan of turning around and continuing your job was cast aside the moment she finally spoke. Cutting you off rightfully so.

"Can you stay?"

It's the tone in which she spoke that made you agree in a flash. It was worded so quickly and almost coldly as if she already predicted the answer. Like she's been given the same one on repeat in the past and yours will sound no different out loud.

Your hand left the door handle in the same manner her eyes did the ground to take a look at you but returned just as fast once you were closing in.

"Is it the audience?" Perhaps not the best conversation starter, starting right at what you presumed to be the core of it.

It's the first time she gave you full attention, you noted. Though it looks like it was short lived and no success achieved.

"Even you saw it?" She asked under defeated breath before her head fell on propped hands. Hearing the whimpers and cries she couldn't bear to hold any longer made you wonder how much worse you just made this for her. The picture of what you caused felt outright depressing to witness.

You sat beside her washed in guilt, trying to fix the situation. Might as well take your time since you disregarded the work awaiting outside this empty room. "Well they don't know what's like to be on stage, do they? Let alone be an actor." You felt your body make a gamble against you, moving with a mind of its own before you could form regret for it. It was like a backup in case the words were of no use.

But Jenna didn't back away. Not in a way you were aware of at least. You're certain the sincere embrace you offered would let you know so. Because you were able to feel her every sniff, shake and tremor that traveled through or is drawing near and so on repeated in a circle. Shirt that was getting stained by the tears went unnoticed.

"Hey, hey focus on me," you spoke softly. Lining up your calmed breathing for her, hoping she will follow by.

Unmistakably the gesture that was felt in return said it all. Jenna hugged you back, drawing you in the most close-knit grip possible. It came across as the hug that was desired desperately. Obvious which side craved it more but you couldn't deny fully it meant nothing to you.

You were not sure how long you remained like this. Long enough to quiet down her cries and make you believe she lost to sleep how her body slumped more and more by the passing minutes. But on the other side of you, Jenna was awake. She must admit it is bizarrely soothing, the strangers embrace. Maybe she crossed the line and anxiety blended with comfort has gotten too wrapped around her head.

That's why she broke the silence huskily, "I'm Jenna by the way." The arms left you shyly and you eventually had her in front of you. After what seemed like the most peace you both ever had there were still homes to head to.

"I think i read it on my schedule this morning," that earned you a smile of hers for a while. She looked tired, burnt out to be precise. While you did say your name it seemed like it was lost in the air.

"Sorry i'm still getting over it," stated rubbing her eyes, "but you do feel like the best nap ever to be honest."

You stopped yourself from dwelling any deeper into studying that sentence so you just returned, "I don't mind, you have it rough anyway. It's the least i can do here."

While recollecting herself in silence, Jenna glanced at the spotted clock on her side and sighed. Once her eyes locked with yours, swearing hers softened for a moment or two, she uttered,

"Do you need a ride?" Truly wishful for her hearing to pick up on your hopeful yes. How could you disappoint?

"That would be great," you clarified standing up, "I've been on my feet all day."

It was seasonal, side job after all. And maybe the chance of getting to know the entire side of the story wouldn't hurt you.

notes: casually spent time over 1k words on a fanfic instead of doing a project for the next week 10/10

*tried to portray anxiety in the closest/correct way but as someone not diagnosed mistakes are possible so apologies in advance

[samflir]

What makes a good boot sequence?

A while ago, I had my first truly viral post on Mastodon. It was this:

You might've seen it. It got almost four hundred boosts and reached beyond Mastodon to reddit and even 4chan. I even saw an edit with a spinning frog on the left screen. I knew the post would go down well with tech.lgbt but I never expected it to blow up the way it did.

I tried my best to express succinctly exactly what it is I miss about BIOS motherboards in the age of UEFI in this picture. I think looking at a logo and spinner/loading bar is boring compared to seeing a bunch of status messages scroll up the screen indicating hardware being activated, services being started up and tasks being run. It takes the soul out of a computer when it hides its computeriness.

I think a lot of people misunderstood my post as expressing a practical preference over an aesthetic one, and there was at least a few thinking this was a Linux fanboy post, which it certainly is not. So here's the long version of a meme I made lol.

Stages

I remember using two family desktop computers before moving over a family laptop. One ran Windows XP and the other ran Windows 7. Both were of the BIOS era, which meant that when booting, they displayed some status information in white on black with a blinking cursor before loading the operating system. On the XP machine, I spent longer in this liminal space because it dual-booted. I needed to select Windows XP from a list of Linux distros when booting it.

I've always liked this. Even as a very little kid I had some sense that what I was seeing was a look back into the history of computing. It felt like a look "behind the scenes" of the main GUI-based operating system into something more primitive. This made computers even more interesting than they already were, to me.

Sequences

The way old computers booted was appealing to my love of all kinds of fixed, repeating sequences. I never skip the intros to TV shows and I get annoyed when my local cinema forgets to show the BBFC ratings card immediately before the film, even though doing so is totally pointless and it's kinda strange that they do that in the first place. Can you tell I'm autistic?

Booting the windows 7 computer would involve this sequence of distinct stages: BIOS white text -> Windows 7 logo with "starting windows" below in the wrong aspect ratio -> switch to correct resolution with loading spinner on the screen -> login screen.

Skipping any would feel wrong to me because it's missing a step in one of those fixed sequences I love so much. And every computer that doesn't start with BIOS diagnostic messages is sadly missing that step to my brain, and feels off.

Low-level magic

I am extremely curious about how things work and always have been, so little reminders when using a computer that it has all sorts of complex inner workings and background processes going on are very interesting to me, so I prefer boot sequences that expose the low-level magic going on and build up to the GUI. Starting in the GUI immediately presents it as fundamental, as if it's not just a pile of abstractions on top of one another. It feels deceptive.

There may actually be some educational and practical value in computers booting in verbose mode by default. Kids using computers for the first time get to see that there's a lot more to their computer than the parts they interact with (sparking curiosity!), and if a boot fails, technicians are better able to diagnose the problem over a phone call with a non-technical person.

Absolute boot sequence perfection

There's still one last thing missing from my family computer's boot sequence, and that's a brief flicker of garbage on screen as VRAM is cleared out. Can't have everything I guess. Slo-mo example from The 8-Bit Guy here:

[livsoulsecrets]

Annabeth&Grover Fic (PJO TV) - You’re gonna go far

Summary:

Annabeth and Grover say their goodbyes before he leaves to search for Percy.

“His words were lost in the space between them when Annabeth threw her arms around him and squeezed Grover in a tight hug.”

Read on AO3.

-

Grover found himself under the shadow of Thalia’s tree as the sun set. The camp’s van sat at the base of the hill as he waited for Chiron to call him over so they could travel to New York.

Annabeth stood by his side, the two of them staring at the horizon, dragging on their goodbye.

“And for how long will you have to stay again?” Annabeth asked, crossing her arms.

A memory flashed through Grover’s mind as he finished stapling his backpack. A distrustful seven-year-old Annabeth repeating the same gesture the day they met, her knife hooked on her belt and a ferocity in her eyes no child should have to carry.

For all of his many failures, he would always be proud of the fact he brought her home.

“I’m not sure yet. Mister D thinks it may take a while until we’re able to get in touch with Sally and set everything up.” He repeated himself.

Annabeth had heard the same answer countless times over the last few weeks, but he didn’t mind repeating himself. He understood it soothed her nerves to oversee the steps of a plan again and again.

“Don’t worry, Chiron will be there with me. We’ll be okay,” reassured Grover in what he hoped was a soothing tone that didn’t betray his own anxiety about his task.

Annabeth nodded. He watched as she forced her arms to unclench.

“I wish I could go too.” She whispered, avoiding his eyes.

“You’ll have your own quest one day, I’m sure!”

“I wanted to go for you, Grover. To help keep you safe.” She countered, facing him again.

Grover felt a lump the size of a pinecone lodge itself in his throat. “Hey, I’m the protector here, remember? You’ve got nothing to worry about.”

Annabeth’s brown eyes filled with tears she bravely fought not to spill. “Oh, no. No, please, don’t cry or I’ll-”

His words were lost in the space between them when Annabeth threw her arms around him and squeezed Grover in a tight hug.

“Be careful, okay?” She mumbled into his shoulder. “Promise me.”

He crushed her against his chest and kissed the top of her head. “I promise.”

Somewhere down the hill, Chiron’s voice echoed Grover’s name, beckoning him over.

Annabeth stepped back and stilled her breath with a deep exhale. She cleaned her tears with the back of her hands and straightened her posture.

“I’ll let you go, now.” She gave him a strained smile, but Grover felt her worry and sadness washing over him like waves.

“I’ll Iris message you as much as I can.” Grover vowed as he walked away. “And I’ll bring you a gift when I’m back.”

That made the corners of Annabeth’s mouth turn up, her smile more genuine than before. “An Empire State Building replica?”

“From the official store!” He confirmed, well aware he had no idea how much that actually cost.

Annabeth waved at him from under Thalia’s tree as more distance was put between them.

Grover waved back, even though she could no longer see him. He vowed to himself that this would not be the last time he ever saw her.

He would not allow himself to fail this time.

[randomfoggytiger]

Curated settle-down-frohike Fics

I adore these fics, written with a mixture of mature sweetness and youthful buoyancy. @settle-down-frohike often evokes the tiny, careful fumbles of new, awkward steps forward or the righteously incensed fury of condemnation or determination. Both are integral to Mulder and Scully as individuals and as a unit; and both are crafted into these pieces with startling clarity and simplicity.

These fics made an early and meaningful impact on my fandom experience; and I still cling tightly to them.

@settle-down-frohike: Masterlist and Ao3

MSR+the desert

He gives the space in front of him a blank once over, obviously preparing for a scathing trademark Mulder monologue, and she’s thinking: here it comes. Her chin raises in defiance, but she can feel her heart begin to pound. 

Post Never Again Mulder has reached his limit.

for the WIP prompt: hospital

“Mulder.” He glanced up, but past her. “I’m fine, Scully,” indignantly going back to the task at hand. And she’d have believed him too, if he wasn’t looking through her, if his pitch hadn’t been a little too high, if he hadn’t forgotten the fact that her shoes were the very last thing to put on and she wasn’t even out of her hospital gown yet. She allowed it out of pity, mostly. Or humor. But his hands shook, fumbling with the laces like a feening alcoholic.

Redux II Mulder is trying to hide his emotions behind preparations for Scully to come home. (Edit: confirmed to be Redux II, not Empedocles by the author! Yes, answers!)

120 for the drabble prompt

The last of these luxuries is currently failing at wiping burnt butter grease from her formerly spotless countertop when Scully, fresh from the hospital, comes wobbling in arm-in-arm with her mother, who’s exasperated expression at the unfamiliar acrid smell of the place is written clearly across her face. They are both damp and stumbling from the downpour outside and the shared clumsiness of her daughter on percocet. Maggie shoots him a flustered glance. The medical journals are new but soggy, waiting on her coffee table. The ice cream is now melted and leaking, forgotten to prevent the sounding of a smoke alarm. 

Post Tithonus Scully is both groggy and happy with Mulder's ministering mishaps. Maggie, not so much.

Luctus

Scully clasps her hands together, wanting to look as much like she is listening as possible, but more so to hide the fact that her hands are trembling. His eyes are glassy, wild and distant. She doesn’t know where this is going.

“I was her favorite you know.” She looks up and he’s staring straight into her. The uneasiness won’t let up. This brazenness is so unlike him. He’s nodding again. “I was,” his gaze focuses back to the wall now, “That’s why she chose her. It had to be,” and just as suddenly his head drops between his knees and his shoulders begin to shake in silent sobs. “It had to be, Scully. Why would she do that?” he croaks.

Post Sein und Zeit Scully has to get Mulder throw that one long, incredibly grueling night.

Sensory Integration (Tumblr)

Only people don’t talk directly to ghosts about their scars and miraculous healing and their perfect health. They’ve been circling each other cautiously since she came to retrieve him this morning. He senses her restlessness and gets the distinct impression that she’s holding back from latching into him and falling apart. He’s grateful for her restraint, because he can’t handle sudden movements right now. If she were to approach too fast in his direction, he’d end up curled in the fetal position somewhere in a corner, protecting his vital organs. He doesn’t know how he knows this, he just does. He’s like one giant Pavlovian experiment.

Stimulus.

Response.

Repeat.

Three Words, Mulder's PTSD, and Scully's heartbreaking understanding.

Magneticus

“Mulder, aren’t we supposed to have a wedding ring for this?” And the unintended double meaning isn’t lost on him. He can tell Scully is regretting the phrase immediately by the fact that she’s now holding her breath.

“You can use a needle too, Scully. Hold still.” Her eyes follow his hand warily as it stretches towards her cheek. “OW!!” He comes away with a single amber stand and carefully threads the eye, double loops it and dangles above her swollen middle. They wait. She sighs heavily.

“Mulder…”

“You know this practice isn’t without scientific theory Scully.” His voice has taken on that nasal quality it tends to when he’s talking mostly to himself.

S8 Mulder tries to determine the baby's gender with the ol' needle twirl. (The ending lines are seared into my brain, forever.)

Paternitas (Tumblr)

 I need to make sure the baby’s nurse comes back for a diaper check. This guy isn’t ready.  I note the various monitors and change her bag. 

 "Would you like to hold him?“ That gets him to look right at me, with an unidentifiable expression.  He looks over at the bassinet, back to me and his mouth opens, but nothing comes out. He’s blinking furiously.  Bless. Indecision and panic are clear as day in his eyes. But something else, too. He looks…guilty. It’s the strangest thing. I can sense that he wants to hold the baby but can’t bring himself to.

While Existence Scully is unconscious and recovering in Georgia, a local nurse looks after her barely functioning partner.

Headcanon

Only once had he feared the words had lost their meaning. He’d come out of his office, in a sparse moment of clarity and had called her name. She appeared from the kitchen, coffee in hand and hair mussed from slumber. It must have been morning. His name had ended with a question mark, clearly surprised by his emergence and the rest of the phrase had gone flat. Her eyes were wide but vacant, “I’m here.”

And then one day he emerged and found that she wasn’t.

My Struggle II Mulder and Scully: first names, nightmares, and comforting each other through the years.

5 Pt. AU Prompts - Chapter 2

Prognosis. Stunted and ignorant. Crushing her under its clumsy, suffocating weight of formality. What does it know. He is a miracle. And miracles defy logic.

AU-- Mulder gets cancer; and Scully is ready for war.

Thank you for reading~

Enjoy!

[8turning]

hii! i was wondering if i could request haemin or kyungmin x gn!reader (established relationship) like them being protective over reader when someone keeps asking for their number or if they have a s/o :) it’s completely fine if you’re uncomfortable with this and don’t want to write it! thank you so much anyway <3

- 🐻‍❄️

hiii 🐻‍❄️ anon!! thank you for this request :]

⌕ . . . jangshinz — two versus one !

bf ! jangshinz (separately) x gn ! reader ★ fluff. established relationship. ★ scenario ★ warnings: food mentions. use of "babe" in haemin's section. weird stranger. let me know if i missed anything!

n. trying out a different format, hopefully its interesting to read :]

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀〈 REBLOGS ARE APPRECIATED ! 〉

some things in life are best enjoyed alone - finding the time to take on small tasks or a new hobby slowly dwindle away as you grow older, making those moments just that much more important.

that, at least, used to be the belief you guided yourself with. relishing in your alone time and making the most of the few hours - or even minutes - you were able to bask in. as of recent times, you've found your time spent alone to feel much more . . . lonely.

that was your intention, though, wasn't it? to free yourself of the pressure to maintain conversation and allow yourself time to recharge your social battery before you had to repeat the same process; it's felt different recently.

in the beginning of your relationship with your boyfriend, you failed to realize why you felt the way you did. but the more and more your usual lonesome weekends turned into morning breakfasts and evening movies, you realized you began to long for more moments with him.

the times you'd typically lay back and recount your day, you found yourself calling him to talk about it. the tingles you felt on your cheeks and the way your heartbeat picked up speed hearing your lover's laugh was all the more proof that maybe some things in life are best enjoyed with the company of someone you love.

you came to that realization slowly, and truthfully, your boyfriend found it cute how often you told him that you missed him or when you would send him a picture of something that brought back a memory of you two; he always did the same.

with the confirmation that your schedules lined up just enough for you two to meet at a nearby café in the afternoon, you found yourself hoping your eventful weekday would go by quicker, but not for the reason you used to wish for such.

days turned into hours, hours into minutes, then within seconds, you heard the bell chime from the cafe's entrance. you raise your head, knowing your boyfriend was close to the location from the constant updates he texted you.

the smile he sent you always gave you a different feeling than the one you'd see while video calling, you could see clearly as the corners of his eyes crinkle with joy as he approaches the table you had acquired for you both.

the café was serene, most people choosing to spend their weekends outside gave you and your boyfriend the benefit of relaxing in quiet, indoor spaces - most of the time, you preferred such anyways.

the minimal chatter of other café-goers and the sound of different drinks being brewed was enough to make your thirst all the more present. pushing away the thought, he sits in the chair across the table, the same handsome smile on his face that he greeted you with when you first met.

"sorry for being a bit late," he apologizes, and its then when you notice the slight pant in his voice. "last schedule ran a bit later than planned."

you shake your head, reassuring him that you're just glad to have this time with him. he smiles once more, leaning an elbows against the table and resting his chin in his palm as he looks at you.

"i'm glad to be here with you, too," he replies - the gaze he held with you was full of love and admiration. "do you want me to go order us something?"

you offer him a smile. "if it's not too much trouble for you," you say, tilting your head to the side as you watch him stand.

"it's never too much trouble if its for you," he says, stretching his long arms in front of him before making his way to the front counter, your order from previous meetings already engraved into his memory.

the bell chiming at the front door could be heard throughout the quaint café - pulling out your phone, you rest your forearms on the table while scrolling through various time-consuming apps as you wait for your lover to return.

though your attention was on your phone, the sound of approaching footsteps made you raise your head - the person in front of you wasn't your boyfriend, though. rather, they were a complete stranger to you.

"no-show date?" they ask, both hands buried into their zip-up jacket's pockets as they stood to the left of the chair across from you. "strange how that always happens to the most attractive people."

shaking your head quickly, you dismiss their claims. "not a no-show," you begin, but before you can elaborate that your boyfriend was just across the shop, the stranger interrupts you once more.

"so they just leave you here all alone, then?"

the persons assumptions made your skin begin to crawl, indirectly insulting your boyfriend's priorities as if they had any idea the ins and outs of your relationship - as if they were entitled to know.

you set your phone face-down on the table, leaning on your elbows as you spoke to them. "can you leave me alone?" you ask, tone coming off more stern rather than that of an inquiry. "why are you even talking to me anyway?"

"why are you replying?" they taunt, a distasteful grin growing on their face - your annoyance was entertaining to them.

from the other end of the shop, where your boyfriend was waiting patiently for your drinks to be made, his gaze falls back to the table he left you at. almost immediately, his eyes dart from the back of your head to the random person you seemed to be conversing with.

thinking nothing of it at first - maybe you just ran into an old friend - he continues to wait, but its only until you lean forward to talk to the stranger and the stranger smiles down at you that he feels his heart sink to his stomach.

there was something odd about the interaction, your previously relaxed demeanor was now tense as you continued to speak with the person. even when the barista called out his name, his eyes remained fixed on your table.

"sir?" someone calls out to him, quickly catching his attention long enough to grab the drinks and thank the worker - his steps felt heavy as he approached the table once more.

he was no lip reader, but as he made his way closer, he could make out some words - words that made his blood run cold.

"i'm just saying, i'd never leave you alone like this," the stranger says, their hands removing themselves from their pockets to lean against the table, holding their weight up by their palms. "why don't you let me take you out?"

his feet pick up pace just enough to reach the table before you could answer the person's question. knowing you'd brush the stranger away eases his mind, but the fact that this random person - who you obviously didn't know either - had the audacity to suggest such from you made him see red. within seconds, you can see your boyfriend standing beside you and staring down the uninvited person.

your belief that some things are best enjoyed alone was shattered once you met your boyfriend, but one belief that remained strong was its additional counterpart: three is definitely a crowd.

💭 001 : JUNG HAEMIN !

haemin was never one for confrontation - you've known that since you met him, so his sudden appearance next to you and eyes pointed in the direction of the stranger was a sight you weren't used to.

feigning obliviousness as to why this person was at the table, he spoke up. "who's this, babe?"

the sudden use of the pet name made you look up at him questioningly - haemin wasn't fond of using them in public, but knowing he's using one now to establish himself as your boyfriend makes your heart skip a beat.

"i'm not sure," you answer honestly, eyes shifting back to the person leaning on the other end of the table. upon hearing this, haemin continues with whatever act he was putting on, even though his skin was crawling from thinking they had tried to court you so openly.

"is there something i can help you with?" he asks with the most polite tone he could muster - you could see right through it, not to mention they way his stance was tense. the stranger simply looks between you and haemin, eyes flicking back and forth a few times before they let out a sigh, pushing themselves off of the table.

"not anymore," they spit, shoving their hands back into their pockets before turning and walking in the opposite direction. you didn't get a chance to make sure they were out of sight before haemin returns to his place across from you, setting your drink down in front of you with a soft smile on his face.

"thank you for saving me, babe," you tease in an attempt to brighten the atmosphere - you're grateful it worked. haemin's hand shoots to cover his mouth, his smile hiding behind it as he pokes his drink with his straw.

he shakes his head, lowering his hand to grab at his drink. "i barely did anything," haemin breaks eye contact with you as he takes a sip. "they barely put up a fight - could sense the jealousy in my eyes."

your brows furrow as his eyes meet his again. "you were jealous?"

you didn't realize?

haemin can manage his emotions well. with his tall build and stoic nature, it probably was difficult for others to read his emotion, hence your confusion and the strangers quick departure.

thinking back on how he probably looked to the random person, he cringes when he imagines himself seeming more fearful rather than threatening and the stranger leaving out of pity rather than panic. haemin lets out an embarrassed groan, both hands now leaving his cup to cover his face to hide his flushed cheeks.

"why're you hiding?" you giggle, leaning forward on the table and grabbing at his wrists softly, prying them away from his face. "you don't have to be embarrassed about anything, haem," you comfort, your thumbs sliding over his knuckles gently.

he drops his head onto his forearms, a soft pink dusting high on his cheekbones as he replays the situation over again in his head.

"if it makes you feel any better, i think what you did was really sweet."

although haemin would probably never admit it to you, hearing you say those words as you play with his fingers made butterflies swell in his chest.

💭 002 : CHO KYUNGMIN !

kyungmin - before thinking of any possible consequences - finds himself brushing past the stranger, seemingly ignoring their looming stance over the table as he passes you the drink you requested.

you watch his action with a confused tilt of your head - you're sure the stranger saw it, too. kyungmin continued as normal across from you, pretending there was not a physical barrier from beside him partially impairing his view of you.

he seemed so unbothered, you almost wanted to laugh. watching as the stranger pushes up from their spot, their eyes land on to the top of kyungmin's head - he paid them no mind, keeping his attention on you.

"did i order the right one?" he asks, eyebrows raising slightly at his inquiry.

"yes, thank you," you reply, knowing he knew your order by heart - he never got it wrong; the question was meant to deter the stranger. instead, they continue to hover your table, causing kyungmin to let out a self-soothing sigh, controlling his minimal patience before finally meeting the eyes of the person.

you watch your boyfriend's eyes flick up, the stranger looming over you both was quick to catch his gaze. "is there a reason you're here?" kyungmin says bluntly - his tone takes you by surprise, his usual shy and soft exterior replaced with one of straight-forwardness.

it seems the person picks up on the suddenly dense atmosphere, quickly shaking their head negatively and muttering a small "no" in reply to your lover, hands finding their way back into their pockets before they turn to take their leave.

it was almost humorous how quickly kyungmin's demeanor changed after that - finding your eyes and immediately the crease between his brows softened and his lips curled into a smile. "they weren't super pushy were they?" he asks, his tone apologetic as he tried to read your face for any discomfort.

"they weren't awful," you reply, breaking eye contact as your thumb rubs the side of your cup - your boyfriend knew you well enough to know you weren't being 100% open. ". . . but still not great," you finish, bringing your cup to your lips to try and ease the uncomfortable feeling settling in your chest.

"i'm sorry i wasn't here sooner," he apologizes, and before you're able to tell him he has nothing to apologize for, he continues. "i'll do what i can to make sure you aren't in that position again."

the feeling in your chest is quickly replaced with one of warmth - a genuine feeling of admiration for the boy who sat across from you with a gleeful smile and a sparkle in his eyes.

"thank you, min," and while kyungmin felt you had no reason to thank him - that it was expected of him to take care of you - he knows you'd insist he's worthy of being thanked. letting the argument die in his throat before he had the chance to say it, he offers you the softest smile he's ever worn.

"anything for you."

© 8turning 2023.

[mizuki-nautilus]

『 Thorn & Roses 』 - Chapter 6

Berry Bliss and Business Brilliance

Several days had elapsed, and [Y/N] was now in her second day as the Manager of Mostro Lounge. It was her first time holding such a position, but with Azul's keen intelligence and [Y/N]'s unwavering determination, she was quickly grasping the ins and outs of running the business much faster than anyone had anticipated.

"Here you go, Azul." [Y/N] handed him the meticulously prepared menu for the next two weeks, taking into account the season's weather and focusing on the delightful theme of "Berry Bliss" for the drinks. "And I've also completed the Inventory and Supply Chain Management for this month," [Y/N] continued, displaying her dedication. "After reviewing the past inventory, I noticed that we can optimize the purchasing of certain cleaning supplies by buying in bulk. I reached out to Sam, and he's willing to offer us a discount as well."

While [Y/N] continued her presentation, she brought up another proposal. "I would like to suggest organizing community events for Mostro Lounge and establishing a stronger presence on social media," [Y/N] expressed, presenting her well-organized papers justifying the project. "I spoke with Cater, who has extensive experience as an active social media user, and I've compiled his insights in these documents." Azul couldn't help but be amazed. He already knew that [Y/N] was an exceptional worker, but her remarkable performance in this role exceeded his expectations.

He couldn't help but develop stronger feelings for [Y/N] with each passing moment. "Excellent," Azul said, attempting to conceal his amazement. "I'll examine your proposal and see how we can accommodate your events." In a moment of shyness and in a barely audible tone, he added, "… Sunshine."while trying to maintain his composure. "Would you assist me in studying this year's strategic planning? It would greatly help me if you familiarize yourself with the plan." Azul handed her the paperwork, "Of course! Let me take a look” [Y/N] eagerly grabbed the paperwork to read.

The business was experiencing a slow day, allowing Azul and [Y/N] to have ample space to work together on the Monster Lounge sofa. With a drink in hand and equipped with calculators, paper, and pens, the two of them savoured their time collaborating on their tasks. At moments like this, Azul could not help but to be captivated by [Y/N]'s enchanting features; to him, she embodied perfection in motion. There was a distinct way her eyes radiated with brightness, leaving him mesmerized as he gazed into them. He genuinely admired how her hair always appeared flawless, even on days when she didn't have the chance to style it. The texture of her hair was simply stunning, framing her adorable face in the most beautiful way.

Among all the captivating qualities [Y/N] possessed, the one that truly mesmerized Azul was the radiant glow of her smile. There was a perfect curvature to her lips that made him feel reassured and safe, as if everything would always be okay in her presence.

Caught in [Y/N]'s adorable expression, Azul was momentarily distracted and failed to realize that she had been trying to get his attention. "Oh! Sorry! Can you repeat that?" he quickly responded. [Y/N] chuckled, "Hahahaha~ You were quite distracted there, Azul. I was just asking about this particular point," she said, pointing to the relevant section in the paper.

While Azul was in the middle of explaining the requested point, Jade unexpectedly interrupted, breaking Azul's perfect scene. "Azul," he calmly stated, "the constructors for the Mostro Lounge renovations are already here." Azul paused for a moment, considering the importance of the situation, and made the decision to join the constructors. "I'll join you back in a second, [Y/N]," he said, leaving [Y/N] alone at a separate table, far away from the rest of the staff and clients.

Engrossed in her work, [Y/N] diligently read through the papers and made detailed notes about the task at hand. She kept her mind focused on the important matters that required her attention. Taking a sip from her drink, she felt a momentary pause as her thoughts drifted towards recent events. It had been a few days since she last heard the cryptic message, "please acknowledge me." The lingering question of what these occurrences meant and why they were happening began to weigh on her mind.

There was always the possibility of dismissing these strange auditory experiences as mere exhaustion or anxiety-related symptoms from her involvement in numerous overblot incidents. Or … someone could genuinely be trying to communicate with her. Contemplating these possibilities, she turned around to survey her surroundings, searching for any signs of people nearby. Finding no one in proximity, she made a decision. "If someone is truly trying to reach me," she murmured, "give me a sign." With bated breath, she sat there, enveloped in anticipation, waiting for any indication.

Seconds stretched into what felt like hours as she fixed her gaze on the table, waiting for something to move or provide a sign. Every fiber of her being was attuned to the slightest movement or change. Just as she began to expect a headache, a hand gently rested on her shoulder, causing her to jump in surprise. Startled, she looked up to find Floyd standing beside her, wearing an amused expression. "Shrimpy~ Did I startle you? " He mockingly expressed.

With a nervous laugh, [Y/N] responded, "Ahahahaha, Floyd, I was just contemplating this document on Sustainability and Responsible Practices, so yes, I did get surprised". Floyd gazed at her with an indifferent expression, showing no interest in the document's content. "Well," he began, "the construction crew will be occupied for a while, Azul said you could leave for the remainder of the shift." As he ran his hand through his hair, Floyd casually delivered the message.

[Y/N] briefly locked eyes with Floyd and expressed gratitude for the information, acknowledging her appreciation for leaving work a few hours earlier. "Let me escort you home, Shrimpy~" Floyd declared, offering assistance with [Y/N]'s belongings. Unbeknownst to [Y/N], as they set off on their journey towards the Ramshackle dormitory, they failed to notice the formation of water droplets from their chilled beverage, spelling out the word "Here."

_______________________________________________

Certainly a brief chapter, but allow me to convey that this marks the beggining of the Azul Ashengrotto x reader narrative tag in this ongoing project 🐙

Another romance involving [Y/N] will be introduced as the story unfolds, but details about that will be revealed later, hehe~

⭐Tag list ⭐

@worldussysblog

[handsome-john]

John’s Summer Comprehensive-Reading Program

Tried really hard to make that and SCP thing.

A majority of my followers probably don’t follow me for SCP content, I don’t know why you follow me in general but I thought, as someone who’s been reading for a while, I’d make my own recommended reading list for those who are interested but just don’t feel like combing through all that. I’ll be listing some skips, tales, and canons I enjoy with brief explanations

I am one man with limited free time, and so this list is just stuff I’ve personally read. If you have something to add to this recommended reading list feel free to do so! If you do not like any of the things I’ve listed here then good on you for taking the time to read them and forming your own opinions on things.

There will be several scp pages linked here, please let me know if anything is linked incorrectly.

A brief guide to onsite terminology

Thought I should write this out just for those who have no idea what I’m talking about. Scroll past this if you’re already familiar

SCP stands for several things, Secure Contain Protect is the main mantra of the site but it more commonly stands for Special Containment Procedures. An SCP is anything the foundation has, or is attempting to, contained. Skip and Scip are just shorthand, pronounced “skip”.

Object classes are not how dangerous a skip is but instead how hard they are to contain. On a scale of Safe Euclid Keter, Safe being the easiest and Keter being the hardest. Thaumiel skips are skips that contain other skips.

Goi and Poi stand for Groups of Interest and Person of Interest. The Foundation is not the only group that deals with the anomalous. Some of these groups or people make anomalies some of them do other things. Have fun reading up on them.

Amnestics and Mnestics erase or help bring back memories. Click here for a full guide to the different types.

A tale is just any story that is not an Scp but takes place within the universe.

MTF or Mobile Task Force are the people that go out into the field to deal with uncontained skips or threats. They tend to have a funny little nickname to go with them.

D-Class are Death-class or Disposable-class depending on who you ask. Deathrow criminals the foundation throws at whatever monster they want just to see what happens.

The Personnel And Character Dossier is a very useful list of almost every character with a dedicated tag. If you notice a name popping up several times and you want to know more it may be helpful to check this out.

In a similar vein, The O5 Command Dossier is a helpful guide to several different version of the O5 council, the end all last decision makers in the Foundation. Their role in the Foundation and who fills those rolls depends on the canon and/or the writer’s personal preference.

I would also recommend reading the History Of The Universe for a history of the wiki itself.

Some SCPs I would recommend based on my incredibly subjective opinions on things!

On the site there are several Curated lists of the best/most popular SCPs, these are super nice if you don’t wanna dive straight in. I’ve tried to pick several that are not on these lists, but there’s some cross overs. If none of this interests you please go check those out!

2721 - Eli & Lyris. What if two space stations became sentient and one of them got hyperfixated on Homestuck and the other became a discord moderator.

5477 - Brokeback Labyrinth. What if instead of getting eaten by the monster they banged instead.

5434 - A literal love god failing at love. A love god starts an app for giving out romantic advice.

4525 - u come 2 dad go. An scp featuring Poi dado and an anomalous store.

6345 - Huesos Malos (”Bad Bones”). A sentient skeleton becomes a lucha libre, an oddly heartwarming tale.

2875 - The Town That Got Fucked By Bears. Bears repeating.

3088 - Law of the Land. Local mayor discovers the ability to turn legal law into laws of nature.

5056 - The Constant Companions. A Story about a man and the ghost that follows him. Not too much on it’s own but this acts as the introduction of the On Guard 43 canon, as well as several tales around Philip Deering and his Mirror Ghost.

5382 - The Cure, and What Ails you. An anomalous sickness caused by Poi Thilo Zwist who now wishes to fix his mistakes.

5281-D - The Man of the Hour. An interesting dive into both an scp and the process by which the Foundation disposes of an scp if the need arises. (I promise this is the last Harry Blank article on this list)

2902 - The Human Skeleton Closet (and his cat). A man who can remove his skin and skeleton at will and a cat he taught to do the same thing. (Previously part of Herman Fuller’s Circus)

1893 - The Minotaur’s Tale. An interesting format break that requires multiple read-throughs.

3493 - The Great SCP Foundation Collaboration. A look at several alternate realities and their collective goals. (Also consider reading SCP-1437 are a similar idea :D!)

1867 - A Gentlemen. A sea slug convinced he is a British explorer with the stories and artifacts to back it up. Lord Blackwood narrates several other tales (Lord Blackwood and the Great Tarasque Hunt of '83 and Lord Blackwood In the Land of Wonder being my favorites)

1459 - The Puppy Machine. A machine that rewards creative ways to murder puppies. Maybe I am going to hell for this but the Experiment logs are infinitely entertaining.

2206 - Maximum League Baseball. What if they added trench warfare to baseball? (Also take the time to appreciate this tale and scp 6206 also linked on the article)

1896 - Indoor Salesmen. A persistent and highly anomalous door to door salesmen.

5049 - Demon Dan's Discount Homunculus Depot. A fairly self-explanatory title, this guys sells homunculus bodies at a discount.

4231 - The Montauk House. A harrowing tale of domestic abuse and the effects thereafter. Heed the warnings. I would recommend familiarizing yourself with Dr Alto Clef before reading.

3999 - I Am At the Center of Everything that Happens to me. A similarly harrowing tale about Researcher Talloran. If you enjoy this scp please take the time to appreciate ... Like Clockwork, a series diving into Talloran’s experiences and self reflection.

A Special Appreciation to the contest contestants and winners

Including these here as separate from my recommendation list. For every 000 milestone the wiki has done a small contest for who deserves the big number.

1000 - Bigfoot (Other submissions)

2000 - Deus Ex Machina (Other submissions)

3000 - Anantashesha (Other submissions)

4000 - Taboo (Other submissions)

5000 - Why? (Other submissions)

6000 - The Serpent, the Moose, and the Wanderer’s Library (Other submissions)

7000 - The Loser (Other Submissions)

Series 1 skips

These guys also get their own separate section because part of my goal here is encouraging people to read stuff that isn’t series one, but there are several skips in series one that affect much of the greater lore of the wiki.

105 - Iris Thompson. (And if you like her I can recommend Scp-1465, Scp-3002, SPC-105, The Resurrection Canon, and Devil’s Advocate)

166 - Meridiana Clef/Wojcienchowski. Daughter of Dr. Alto Clef. (And if you like her I can recommend 0166, Scp-4166, and the tale Hawaiian Shirts). I do wish she had her own tag and there was more of her in general, but here she is.

73 - Cain & 76 - Able (Abel?) (As well as their estranged brother Scp-4840) If you like Cain I can recommend the tale Mementos. If you like Able can I ask why? I really don’t get it. (not judging you, he just doesn’t appeal to me as a character)

507 - Grabnok. (And if you like him I can recommend the tale Day Trip)

96 - The Shy Guy. Classic murder monster, not much to say. Here’s Dr. Dan’s tag.

408 - Illusory Butterflies. (Introduction to Dr. Kondraki, and if you like him I can recommend the tales Duke Til’ Dawn, Portraits of Your Father, and The King is Dead)

784-Arc - Posthuman Brain. Formerly Agent Adrian Andrews. (Read about him in Incident Zero and the 784 Incident)

239 - Sigurros. (And if you like her I can recommend the 239-B Incident and Adventures of Siggy and Robomonkey)

113 - The Gender switcher. Trans rights! (Also check out the tale Legally a Falcon (For Tax Purposes)! And SCP-6113)

353 - Vector. (And if you like her I can recommend the tale An Apple a Day...)

423 - Fred. (And if you like him I can recommend Murphy Law)

Scp-001

There are many SCP 001s, I wouldn’t suggest these as the first things to read as many are very complicated and connect to larger canons. Here’s a few that are pretty good.

CODE NAME: S. D. Locke - When Day Breaks

CODE NAME: S. Andrew Swann - The Database

CODE NAME: Lily - The World's Gone Beautiful

CODE NAME: Dr. Clef - The Gate Guardian

CODE NAME: Dr. Gears - The Prototype

CODE NAME: Pickman/Blank - The Frontispiece

Some Groups on Interest you may be interested in

As I stated before the Foundation isn’t the only one that deals with the anomalous. I won’t go into too much detail with them as you can read about them yourselves, but here’s some I recommend with related material.

Global Occult Coalition (Consider reading the casefiles and the Unfounded Canon)

Are We Cool Yet? (Consider reading The Cool War)

Gamers Against Weed (Consider reading Cool and Awesome Ways to Say No to Weed and Jude's Bizarre Adventure)

Herman Fuller’s Circus of the Disquieting (Consider reading the Dread and Circuses Canon)

Dr. Wondertainment (Consider reading the What a Wonderful World Canon)

The Black Queen (Consider Reading up on Alison Chao and her father Dr Gears)

Serpent’s Hand (And the Foundation’s sister site The Wanderer’s Library)

Shark Punching Center (I don’t have anything to recommend here but SPC sure is a thing that exists)

And many more!

There is No Canon

I’ve mentioned several Canons throughout this list and I though I’d give a full recommendation of Canons I enjoy. While the wiki itself has no all encompassing canon there are several mini canons that follow their own rules. Some of them co-exist, some of them don’t, some of them are complicated.

I promise these canons are not as intimidating as they may seem, and I would really like to see more of some of these. Here’s my personal Favorites.

On Guard 43 - One of the first canons I’ve read and my personal favorite. I’ve already linked several things from the canon on this list, hope you’ll give this one a chance.

Resurrection -  A plot heavy look into the Foundation’s attempts to weaponize Scps, specifically Iris Thompson. One day the authors resurrect the Resurrection canon. (Insert Second Devil’s Advocate plug here)

S & C Plastics - A very fun look at causal life in the Foundation universe. If you like character based stories or prefer something a little less world ending then you’ll enjoy this canon.

Unfounded - An interesting look into a universe where the Foundation never existed.

Broken Masquerade - Another canon that criticizes the Foundation’s main goal, protection of secrecy.

What a Wonderful World - A deep dive into the past and future of Dr Wondertainment.

Daybreak - Following the events of S.D. Locke’s proposal how does life move on from such an event?

Dread & Circuses - With Herman Fuller gone the “freaks” take over the circus for themselves.

End of Death - What if everyone suddenly stopped dying all at once? An interesting tale of foundation woes. (On a slightly unrelated note, the story 17776 has a much more lighthearted take on a similar idea)

Ship In A Bottle - I feel like I should put a joke here. If you enjoy a bit of tactless humor and you’re familiar with Dr Clef an Dr Kondraki then this is a small canon about being human and also putting your dick in plastic bottles. If that doesn’t sound like your cup of tea then please at least read the tale Lizzy the Big Weird Dog.

I feel like I should also mention Lolfoundation, so there you go I’ve mentioned it.

Other

I don’t know if this post will encourage anyone to get into scp, I mostly wrote this for myself. If you like this post and weren’t turned off by how long it is then I’m glad! I hope you enjoy your reading. I may update this list in the future.

I also want to stick a couple other things here

I haven’t gotten a chance to listen to the podcast Find Us Alive, but I’ve heard good things and I’ll recommend it here

If you haven’t watched Lord Bung’s Scp Confinement go do that. It’s what got me into scp.

There is a graphic novel based on SCP-5000. I think it’s really cool and you can purchase it here.

Happy reading!

[mashihope]

❥ [DKB] Their makeup is done by their crush (Maknae line)

(This mini moodboard is made by me; I don’t own any of the pics.)

• Members: Lune, Junseo, Yuku, Harry-June

• Group: DKB

• Warning

• Synopsis: You wanted to practice your makeup skills and decided to ask him to be your model. Little did you know, you're actually his crush!

[Note: I have zero knowledge about makeup, some things will probably make no sense at all, sorry about that] Hyung line

Lune

So... This looked like an easy task at first.

You thought Seongmin would be the type of person to be completely quiet during a makeup session, trying to make everything as easy as possible in order to be done fast.

And he actually is. He doesn't like to be alone for a long time with someone he doesn't know. He would rather be with his chaotic friends running around while he's getting his makeup done.

The thing is, Seongmin knows you... but wish he wouldn't.

He was screaming inside when you asked him, so you didn't know whether he accepted or not.

He just sat down on the nearest chair and waited for you to start pulling the brushes and makeup from your bag.

Honestly? His knees felt so weak when you suddenly approached him with a smile, that he thought he would immediately fall to the floor (and he doesn't want to look more pathetic in front of you, no)

He's so quiet that you're actually wondering if you've ever heard his voice before and how did it sound like. (I guess it sounds like angels singing behind the gates of heaven??)

Okay so... He's spacing out. A lot. He's not even blinking.

You stopped midway and slowly leant towards him, trying to verify if he was a real human or a statue (a really charming one, I must say) but you jumped back because he actually looked back at you.

Now he's confused about why you did that. Let his brain refresh, please. He just got back from dancing to Sober with the aliens in Mars.

He has just remembered what he was doing. His cheeks are suddenly making you wonder if you actually did put blush on them already.

wait WAIT

I DON'T THINK HE'S ACTUALLY BREATHING, IS HE??? 😰

You'll never know, but he's convinced he's able to comunicate through telepathy with the other members... He's desperately calling them for help at this very moment. Jokes on him, Harry is guarding the room on the other side of the door, trying really hard to hold his laugh.

He's sweating, I repeat, HE'S SWEATING. IS THIS MAN OKAY?? 😥

You left him for a brief moment (worried like the mom of a little kid with fever) to go get a mini fan but... Where's Seongmin?

(Fun not so fun fact, he has ran away and is now hiding somewhere)

Junseo

You didn't know what to expect with this guy at all.

All you knew is that he would be a great model (I mean, just look at him and that precious face 🥰)

He told you to ask someone else because he thinks it won't look good on him :(

You held his hand and softly squeezed it before you made him follow you to the practice room.

He was still confused about why you wanted HIM to be your model when there are 8 more members who (according to him) are way prettier than him. He sat on the floor, however, patiently waiting until you sat in front of him with your makeup bag.

"Why are you always hiding behind that hat?" you took off the bucket hat that you were so used to see him wearing, "It's called fashion" (he said it trying to look cool, but failed miserably)

"Have I ever seen your forehead before...?" you gently brushed the hair off his face, but it all came back after you blinked, which made you suspect that he put it back that way, "I guess that not being able to see is called fashion too?"

You stood up and he wondered if you were mad at him :'(

Luckily for him, you were just looking for your backpack :')

You came back with a cute brown kitty headband, making him give you a weird look because he knew what was coming next.

Cute lion Junseo!

"Do I really have to wear this?" (while pointing at his head) "Yup" "Okay"

You started to hum unconciously to Tell me Tell me playing in the background, which made him smile brightly 🥺💕 (he got you smiling back!)

Junseo soon acknowledged that it was a safe zone, making his shoulders finally drop after being so tense for the past minutes.

He slowly began to tell you random facts and stuff he read around the internet yesterday, he looked so stupidly cute while showing you his "nerd" side 😔❤️

He was really happy to hear you talking back!

Some people had showed signs of being annoyed with that little habit in the past, some of them straight up telling him to shut up :(

You don't really understand half of the things he's talking about, but none of you seem to care 😌

If only you had known sooner this would make you hear a lot of his cute giggles, you'd actually have done it a long time ago 💔

Your heart melts when he looks up to you with those pretty eyes and that gaze full of love and adoration.

He wishes he could stop time right there and then, feeling your warm breath on his face and your hand carefully placed on his chin.

You wonder what's going on inside his head after he gives you the sweetest smile you've ever seen, with his eyes almost disappearing.

Perfect timing, you have finished!

You cup his face with your hands and gently rub your thumbs on his cheeks, admiring both Junseo and your work, with a proud smile.

"We shouldn't let this go to waste, pack your things and let's go out!"

"Like... as in a date? 😳"

"Yeah, sure, I just want to show off my amazing model 😏"

Yuku

...he started to jump around the place a few seconds after you asked him, like a little puppy who's aware you're preparing everything to go out for a walk.

You're a little nervous but it looks like there was nothing to worry about after all!

Plus, he looks so cute right now 🥺 (not that he didn't before, though. He's just too cute too handle)

He told you he would play one of his "happy" playlists, filled with lots of bright and cute songs (Expect Dun Dun Dance and Smiley to come out of the speakers any time soon!)

It was funny to see him try to be all serious and still when you tapped the sponge across his face, so different from his usual self.

He started to make weird faces when you began to use a brush, "Y/N, it tickles" (you swore you felt your heart laugh along with him after hearing his voice)

You couldn't help but tickle his whole face with the brush, making him laugh so loud that the music started to fade in the background

And, honestly? That sound will always be better than any song anyway (no offense, Yuku, your playlist is amazing)

Him being all smiley and giggly didn't really help because he was making you laugh too (I guess we can call it "the Yuku effect"?)

He was singing from time to time and you tried to join him whenever you knew the lyrics, and if you didn't, you just vibed to his beautiful voice.

He looked at you with shiny eyes when you started to put lipstick on him, the sun rays coming through the window and laying on him as if he was recharging for his next move.

And, just like that, he gave you a sweet peck on the lips, after which he fell from the chair, laughing nervously while covering his face with his hands.

You slowly turned your head towards the little sunshine, still laughing on the floor, looking like a Sim awkwardly waiting for instructions.

He leaned on his elbow and tried to apologize, but your face made it funnier somehow, making him fall back again while wiping the tears in his eyes.

Coco Colada has just started playing in the background, making him stand up and dance automatically.

Heechan has been attracted by the music and is now dancing like a fool with Yuku.

Harry-June

He looked like a lost puppy when you asked him about it, but eventually accepted when Dongil reassured him saying that it would be a win-win.

He looked at him with wide eyes after that, though. You didn't know what was wrong but didn't ask either.

You actually thought it would be way harder to get him into doing his makeup, but, hey, he seems chill with it, doesn't he? 🙂

Oh well. He isn't, in fact, chill with this situation AT ALL.

This poor baby is actually shaking :(

He's even sitting down while looking at the floor :'(

You crouched and looked up at him, making his eyes go wide again and his cheeks turn a soft shade of pink.

You asked him if everything was okay, with the sweetest voice and smile EVER.

OMG THAT MADE HIS HEART BEAT SO F*CKING FASTER.

He always thinks that he can't like you more than he already does, but, somehow, you always manage to prove him wrong!

You tried to do everything as gentle and soft as possible, as if you were painting a delicate doll made of glass that could break at any given time.

He tried so hard to not be caught looking at you, thinking that he would look like a weirdo or something :(

But, he had been given the chance to admire you from closer than he usually does. He wasn't looking at you from the other side of the school halls, you were right in front of him and smiled a few times already.

He wasn't seeing things this time, you actually smiled at him today!

His eyes were closed because you were putting some eyeshadow on him, but the image of you smiling flashed through his mind.

When you turned around to pick up something else from the table, he started to cough because HE CHOKED WITH HIS OWN SALIVA.

It's been a few minutes since he fully recovered but the warmth on his cheeks won't leave, I guess there's no need to put any actual blush on him!

"And... Done! We should take a photo, don't you think?"

He stuttered after that, not really knowing what to say nor do, but still put his face a little bit closer to yours when you stood next to him.

You picked up your phone, pressed the camera button, and thought he looked nothing like he actually should.

Worried that he would feel bad after seeing it, you made a second attempt, in which he appeared blinking.

"Well... I don't know if this will mess up with the foundation or something but, sorry in advance!"

He looked at you confused while you put the timer, but you signed at him to look at the camera instead.

3, 2, 1... you left a little kiss on his cheek, making his eyes go wide.

Dongil comes back with a playful expression on his face, his eyes going back and forth between Harry and you.

You try to look as innocent as you can, while Harry is still trying to process what has just happened.

"Ah... I guess this has been a succesful mission after all... Good job, Y/N!", Dongil is giving you a thumbs up, making you shy for the first time today... Does he know what just happened?

Fun fact pt. 2: Dongil has been looking through the glass door of the practice room, hiding himself as much as he could and feeling so proud of his little brother!

[selfcontainedunivcrse]

vwoop + cion something, ~1100 words

“If it isn’t the littlest enderman,” Cion cooed, peering over to the corner of the shop where Vwoop sat. It seemed to be organizing a bookshelf; it frowned as it tried to shove another book into a shelf that didn’t have the space for it. It looked up to Cion in greeting, and then continued at its task.

So Cion continued, “Where’s your keeper?” 

Seren. Vwoop's… father, Cion reasoned, though the two of them met the framing with some resistance. The two didn't tend to refer to eachother as anything in particular, so he filled the space. Regardless, they were a difficult individual, one that Cion hated to give the credit implied when he called them dangerous. There was something about him, though. Many players pondered the great universal encoding or whatever they were calling philosophy these days -- probably not that--, but it always took an odd one to actually put action behind the theory.

Cion's eyes swept the place. Trinkets were stacked on tables, shelves, and the floor, none of them anything that Cion had ever seen before. Something tucked behind a bowl on a shelf caught his eye. One moment it was a jar. It was seethrough and narrow, and probably hollow. Cion didn't want to find out. In what seemed almost like a breath, the expanded slightly, the glass turning into an opaque pink and black repeating pattern. It contracted inwards, becoming clear once again.

“Ren? I dunno. He’ll be back before the evening — errands, I think, probably.” Vwoop paused for a second, allowing Cion to hum in response, before starting again. “I, um, finished writing down the cookbook! The pictures aren’t very good, but — but, ah, I tried.”

Ah. Vwoop’s… bootlegging. It was somewhat endearing. He didn’t want to explain copyright to it — if not because it would be too hard, or would crush the poor thing’s hobby, then it was definitely because Cion sort of was curious about the nebulous way that it was to be enforced.

See, Cion understood. Cion understood that being told what to do sucked. Cion understood that most rules were bluffs -- there was always a way around them, so long as you weren't particularly attached to the society that created it.

Some rules weren't like that. Well, they were -- but Cion was very attached to his un-corrupted world, thank you!

Vwoop tilted its head as Cion didn’t respond. “What’s up?”

“I have something else for you.”

Ah, right.

Seren wouldn’t be back for while, it sounded. It was as good of a time as any to talk to Vwoop in confidence. He could feel the base of his throat go cold as Vwoop looked up at him, its eyes perpetually wide. This was a bit… well, a bit unfair in a way, wasn't it?

The poor thing liked him -- well enough, at least. If it wasn't on account of his character (and it almost certainly wasn't), then it was because it felt some sort of kinship with the fact that he was an enderdragon. It was an ender-lotl, as its father had apparently told it. Seren failed to elaborate on what this meant; it was ender, it was an axolotl, obviously? (This was, of course, after Vwoop had introduced itself properly; before, Seren had explained Vwoop using other, increasingly unconvincing methods when Cion had caught glimpses of it peeking around doorframes.) Regardless, given their shared species traits, Vwoop had seemingly decided that they just had to be friends.

It was a mutually beneficial relationship that they had going on. For everything about endermen that Cion shared, Vwoop was very receptive to phishing about its father. Vwoop didn't seem to know very much -- he was a bit strict, seemed to keep it on a tight leash. What exactly his problem was seemed to be a mystery to the both of them. Still, he must have some sort of motivation -- nothing that Cion could think up painted him in a favourable light. And then, there was Vwoop itself… among the whatever exactly Seren was doing with all of these -- for lack of a better term -- weird, existentially concerning novelties, Vwoop seemed to be his crown jewel.

But, well… there was no sport in this. It was not difficult to fool, and he didn't feel good about it. The only reason that he still kept at it was that as transparent as Vwoop seemed to Cion, it must be doubly so to Seren. They needed to dress their words in something too innocuous, something not even worth repeating to its father. They weren't even hard to come up with. It had no reason not to believe him. Surely it had to have learnt about lying, like, conceptually -- but if it had, it didn't tend to show it.

Or, maybe it had, and it was far exceeding Cion's expectations.

Cion took the fabric from his cape to shine the eye on his chest -- it occasionally fogged with the temperature, but it was somewhat of a nervous habit. It was strange to touch it, but he'd gotten used to it over the time -- there was a sense of disconnect with these glass eyes, a sort of barrier between himself and the outside world. After thoroughly fiddling, he pulled the eye from its silver socket. That, too, took getting used to, as half of his vision sat in his hand.

With a bit of concentration, he focused on his other eye -- the one sitting atop his crown -- until the first lens faded from his vision. The connection was still there, though. He held it out to Vwoop.

“You’re giving me your pin?” Vwoop asked. "I -- I like it, but I don't have a cape, so…"

“Well, I use it as a pin. It's not, though, on its own. You know what it is, isn't it?"

“It’s an ender eye. They look for the stronghold. You have two of them, 'cause it's enderman-like, and you're enderman-like," Vwoop offered. "Yeah?"

"Yeah, more or less," they said. "So, Pipsqueak, for you."

It took the little orb in its hands. It seemed to weigh it, before turning it over its hands.

Cion bent down slightly to see it better.

"… thank you, but, um, why?"

"Well, it's a whole can of worms." They waved their hand meaninglessly. "Society. Most things are like that. It goes home."

"If your home is the End."

"Well, not anymore, but for the average guy. Ender-guy. It's sort of a sense of community, eh? Something to take you home. It's made from enderman drops, they're pretty protective of those pearls -- at least, not giving them over to players -- well, considering they all want to kill the dragon, I guess you can't blame them. Never heard of piglins or villagers doing any of that nonsense, anyways, 'cept the player converts but that's not what this is about."

"I follow…?"

"And the shape of the eye. The imagery of it. And -- well, you'll find this as you go, society's all about the ancestors and the lineage. The eye's looking for home, but the eye's looking at you, too, eh? It goes both ways. So," he paused, reaching down to mess the fur on the top of Vwoop's head. "So, there you are. For you."

Vwoop seemed to contemplate this for a moment.

"Think of it as a good luck charm, maybe. Keep it with you. Ah -- there's something else about good luck charms, though, as they tend to be. You can't tell anyone."

[riftwalker-limbro]

These are just some vague thoughts but you got me thinking, so:

We don't know how long the Drifter spent on the Zariman before ending up in Duviri (I feel like Quite A While since Duviri seems to be overall timeloopy and "death works differently" there, so I'm extrapolating that all the aging that Drifter has done they did on the Zariman)

Melica is comparable to a ghost or someone with dementia, repeating old patterns they aren't aware no longer match the world around them. Your task during Zariman bounties is to treat her with kindness and match your reality to hers, so to say, and it seems to be a standard procedure for the Holdfasts

I feel like these two things together could've led to Drifter treating Ordis in a much more human way and Ordis responding in kind (of course assuming Drifter's Zariman also had a surviving but damaged Melica)

Okay that's all I've got but now I'm just rotating in place about Cephalons and the Ordis-Drifter dynamic and how Operator And Ordis Should Be More Friends Than This, Dang It

(This is space-ninja-fashion-show btw, sideblogs just do be doing sideblog things)

OAGH i love where your brain is going... canonically vaguely-douchy operator (anyone who isn't nice to ordis to me is like... why? why do you not like this broken warrior-machine-abomination... /half-joking i love him but i can see how he gets on people's nerves sometimes)

i haven't gotten around to do zariman bounties since That One Fateful Night... but god that sounds so nice. i've worked a tiny bit with people with dementia once and it (the disease, the thought that it could happen to me, not the people) scares the hell out of me but lowkey teaching the players that is very nice of warframe

okay taking your idea for a spin - dyou reckon the drifter would have at first been like oh shit. this cephalon sounds mildly borked. i better treat him nice like melica. and it took them a while to realize that ordis isn't as borked as she is? and how one night they just go. wait. you're actually like more than halfway fine aren't you. and ordis- yeah the idea is spinning wildly out of control thank you for the contribution to my brainworms. they will feed off of this for a Good While.

i desperately need to know how drifter & drifter's!ordis met now. god. because in that timeline... maybe there *were* other tenno who did take the man in the wall's deal, and the Old War went on as normal, just without the child who would become the Drifter. maybe one of the tenno has something happen to them & their cephalon ordis is left to float around a bit uselessly? maybe he doesn't want to report back because he failed his task of keeping them safe (not his task but that doesn't stop him from taking it on) and he ends up in a guilt-spiral? agh

[hopeamarsu]

Whumptober Day 29: What Doesn't Kill Me

Whumptober masterlist

Santiago Garcia x gn!reader

Rating: Mature

Word count: 1,3k

Warnings: Captured, pain, breaking out, blackmail, morally gray characters, just who is the bad guy?

Summary: You've watched the interrogation tapes and never does his defiant smirk wash off his face. You'll need that kind of strength to pull this off.

I couldn't have finished this without some gentle nudging from Thia @clydesducktape. Thank you <3

Sleep deprivation | Defiance | “Better me than you.”

You watch him as he strides the cell confidently as he has done for the past 45 minutes. He takes swift steps in a triangle, using the length of his legs to measure the small room and keep himself occupied. Back straight, arms held out behind him as he paces the length of his confined space. He might not know what goes on outside of his cell, but he’s not letting that bring his spirit down one bit. You admire him for that.  

You feel sweat pooling in your armpits as you keep standing there, scared beyond anything that you’ll be found out. You might be crazy for doing this, but you know it’s now or never. You can do this. You HAVE to do this. You cannot fail, you repeat the mantra in your head. Everything is on the line now and you can’t fail in your task. You life and his depend on it. You just hope you can absorb some of his strength while you do this. You know you are not nearly as defiant as the man in the cell. 

You’ve seen all his interrogation tapes, the way he has smirked and taunted and talked bullshit until everyone in the room apart from him have gotten frustrated and left him to stew or lick his wounds. He - Santiago they have said his name is - has never once budged. Not once, not even when faced with the impossible. Never when he’s been bleeding on the floor, beaten by the enforcers after making yet another interrogators frustration boil over. Nothing has stopped the facial expression he carries with him like a shield. 

That small, defiant smirk on his gorgeous mouth dancing on your screen has followed you to your little apartment and it hopefully gives you the needed strength to do what you have been ordered to do. 

With a final nervous glance around the hallway, you step forward and palm the electronic key tucked into your pocket. You've cloned it from one of the officers coming and going from his cell in order to evade capture. Holding your breath, you twist the handle and open the door silently. You slip into the cell and close the door behind you before looking at Santiago. 

The matted salt and pepper curls fall on his forehead as he whips his head to meet you. He regards you with a curious expression, the smirk absent from his face now. You never knew you’d miss that smirk until it’s not there. You look at him for a moment, committing him to memory before wringing your hands and whispering the words you've practiced many, many times. This is it, you’ll just have to hope what’s going to happen doesn’t kill you before you can get to safety. 

“I’m, I’m ge-getting you out of here.”

One of Santiago’s eyebrows raises in a mock surprise. You shrink a little more under his scrutiny because you know you don’t look like much, your demeanor far from confident. You are definitely not a rescue cavalry of any kind and your lab coat outs you as a scientist and not a soldier. Still you hold your ground and keep your eyes on him and not on the dirty floor beneath both your feet where you want to look. 

“Oh yeah? Why?” He cocks his chin up, challenging you to convince him that this isn’t another plot or a ruse to get him to talk more. He’s clearly heard it all before, all the tips and tricks and a scared scientist trying to act as a knight in white armor has to be one of the oldest ones in the book. 

You hold your breath for a moment, trying to gather your wits under his watchful gaze. The gaze that feels a thousand times heavier than it has when you’ve studied it on the tapes. You feel like the center of his universe and the tiniest thing in the world all at the same time. It’s unsettling. 

You release your breath and the next words tumble out unprompted, fast and jumbled. “Catfish said I need to get you out. That…” You think back to the words he told you before repeating them slowly. “Te tengo hermano.” 

Suddenly Santiago’s face is all you can see, his eyes frantic as they search for a hint of a lie in your wide ones. His hand grips your wrist, the hold so tight that you wince. He doesn’t budge or acknowledge you are hurting because of him. He might be crushing the small bones for all he cares, the only thing Santiago wants now is answers. “Catfish?” He hisses and you nod frantically,  the pain of his grip washing over you. 

“Ye-yea. He, umm, they found me and ummmm, we came to an agreement.” You don’t tell him the details, they are not important. Getting him out is and you are already running in borrowed time. More sweat oozes down your neck and collarbone because you are not yet out of here. The pain keeps growing but you don’t try to free yourself, you already know it will be impossible. The skin under his strong fingers throbs and you try to breath through it, your nostrils flaring a little with every attempt. 

“They? Who else was there?” Santiago grits out, one of his cuts on his lip bursting open at the speed of the words leaving his mouth but he doesn’t even register it. His eyes have an unknown glint in them, something that tells you he needs to know more in order to believe you. That you need to be honest or he will not believe you. He tugs you closer and it’s a miracle you keep your footing. 

For a moment you want to be defiant like he is, deny Santiago of the knowledge. It feels crazy, this sudden fire building inside you and you press your lips tight together to let it build up even more. It’s a battle of wills, something you didn’t think you had inside you but it feels so good to not roll over immediately. 

But then you think back to the meeting in the alleyway and the three men holding their guns at you. How their faces had been hard, unyielding, and scary. How they had threatened your life if you failed in this. 

How they had given you the words to bring back to Santiago so he would believe you. Snarled them in your direction before having you repeat them over and over again until they were convinced you would not forget. You think you will never forget the words, so hard they have drilled them into you with their guns still drawn. So you cave into his demand, your defiance melting away as soon as it came. You search his gaze, willing him to see the honesty hiding behind your fearful tears running down your cheeks.  

“They told me to tell you St John still holds the key to Colombia. They, as in Catfish, Ironhead and Benny. They can’t come in here so I'm going to bring you to them.” You consider yourself lucky your knees don’t buckle under the pain that radiates from his grip when he grips you tighter. You are sure a squeak of pain leaves your lips but it falls to deaf ears.  

At last, Santiago’s face brightens and suddenly the defiant smirk is back. He nods like he knows what the words mean. He releases you quickly and you rub the sore wrist, forgoing your mess of a face for now. He doesn’t comment on your condition, but gestures at the door. “Alright then. I crave some fresh air, my dear scientist. Lead the way to freedom.”

[settlercolonialismisbad]

Veterinary Story Time

I work in a veterinary hospital. I talk to no less than 100 different clients and other people each day. We process approximately 40 to 50 animals on any given day. Often, I am in a position to answer the phone.

In one such situation today, I answered the phone and an individual immediately started berating me and the veterinary technician who was caring for his animal because he had been told half an hour ago that the tech was busy, and would call him back as soon as she could, and she had not called him yet. Ironically, I had run to answer this phone call directly from holding down a fractious cat and assisting with the placement of an IV while the technician in question placed it and began to administer life-saving fluids.

In the hospital today, we had several emergencies, unexpectedly complicated surgeries, and almost every single pet parent had been very late or very early for their appointment and pickup times that day. We were literally running between tasks.

His dog was a drop off, meant to stay all day. He insisted that he had plans tonight (we close at 6 PM and it was 4:30 when I answered the phone), and that his animal really needed our extra support and that we were currently failing at it. I had not even had the opportunity to get his pet’s name yet.

I told him that currently, there were several animals in the hospital that required immediate attention. He then told me not to be passive aggressive and asked me if he “needed to go full on karen with me and ask for my manager.”

I asked him what his pets name was and he interrupted me midsentence to ask for my name. I told him. I began to repeat my question so I could check on his animal and he then launched into a diatribe, “[my name], you should really institute a dropoff system that actually works if you’re going to have dropoff appointments…”

(btw- it works great when people pick up and drop off their pets on time and there are a limited number of emergencies, but we are a HOSPITAL. In general, please know that if the medical staff can give you a solid pick up time when they talk to you, they will because they don’t want your animal taking up space that could go to another animal any longer than you do.)

At this point he actually started screaming into the phone so loud that so that the person next to me winced. I said “Sir, you’re yelling. The technician will call you back as soon as they possibly can. They have not forgotten. That was inappropriate and I’m going to hang up the phone now.”

Half an hour later, I have informed the technician of what has transpired and am collecting my water bottle from the front desk before I clock out. They had told me to hurry up and get out of there before he got there because his ire had been transferred to me from the tech and they were afraid of what would happen if he saw me. She said he had been angry and hyperventilating when she called him back.

He busts through the crowd of people waiting for their pets (because of course everyone showed up at once) and leans on the desk over the scale to ask my coworker and I, “Which one of you is [my name]?” I replied that it was me. He told me that I “really needed to be more careful how I talk to people” because “he’s bipolar and I triggered him and…” at this point, I said, “OK, I’ll go let them know that you’re here.” And I walked into the back and let the crew know that it was too late and that I had not made it out before he got there.

It was way past time for me to leave, so I’m trying to get out of there as fast as possible and plan to use a side exit. I put on a hoodie and take off my glasses and walk out of a side exam room door, not even turning to glance at the lobby. He follows me out of the lobby and takes a picture of me with his phone. I told him that I was a private citizen and he didn’t have permission to take that picture. He ran away back inside, saying he could do what he wanted.

I turned around and walked away. One of our clients followed me and asked if I was OK because they had seen the whole interaction. I thanked them and told them I was OK and walked to my car and drove home.

This is a slightly more extreme example, but we deal with people who act in a similar manner quite frequently and it’s not mental illness, it’s entitlement. Anyone in any public-facing position will hear this and probably be reminded of a story or two of their own. That’s not ok, folks.

No one should ever treat people who serve the public in this way. Especially not the people who are scratched and bitten so that your dog’s overactive anal glands can be expressed regularly and who cry over your loved ones when it’s time to make a quality of life decision about your animals.

Sidenote, it’s also never OK to try to use a mental health diagnosis to intimidate other people into doing what you want or accepting their own mistreatment. they’re not accountable for your actions.