#if you need me i will be coughing my lungs out for the next few hours

[moonlight-prose]

i feel like someone is currently using my lungs as a stress ball but to make up for lack of fics. please take pictures of my cats.🖤

[dcandmarvelimagines]

sweeter than you ever knew. (pt. 2)

Series: pt 1 pt 2 pt 3 pt 4 pt 5 Pairing: Wade Wilson x Logan Howlett x Fem!Reader Rating: Explicit Word Count: 4.2k Warnings: AFAB reader (uses she/her pronouns), 1st person POV, non-mutant Reader, Oral sex (f! recieving), vaginal fingering, overstimulation, Wade breaks his nose so a bit of blood, Wade is an absolute pervert Logan is too, voyeurism, Logan puts his cigar out on his hand, Logan is also very emotionally stunted but we'll work on that Author's note: Holy shit guys?? This blew up in a way I totally didn't expect. I seriously thought this would just be something I uploaded and would get like five notes. You guys have been so sweet! Thank you so much! I hope you like this next installment. Things take a bit of a turn at the end and in the next chapter, but fear not besties, we will make it out of this and to a happy ending I swear! ao3 Tags (if you would like to be included or removed, just let me know): @fallout-girl219 @xolosimp @o0aligoth0o

Early that Monday, I met with my supervisor. When I explained that I was becoming attached to Al’s roommates and it would most likely affect my working relationship, he just sighed. Apparently, Al had requested that I’m her only caretaker and said she would refuse anyone else. “So keep your head on straight around them. Don’t make me regret it.” 

When I walked into the apartment later that day, I knew Wade would make me fail. He instantly wrapped me in his arms, covering my face in slobbery kisses. But I was able to keep him at arm's length while I was on the clock for Al. He was allowed one kiss when I got there and nothing else. Despite his protests, he respected my boundaries. With Wade forced to behave, it allowed me to start talking to Logan more. There was some sort of tension between us that had eased. The crease between his eyebrows whenever he saw me had slowly faded. I saw him smile more often. He was surprisingly nice to be around once I got past his gruff exterior. I kept myself an open book, answering any questions he had, but he kept his life close to his chest. I didn’t expect him to spill his guts and I accepted the little crumbs he gave me. But sometimes he was broody and quiet, keeping his responses short, a distant look in his eyes. 

Nevertheless, it began to grow into something more. It started off small, little touches to the back, him forcing me to sit when I had been rearranging Al’s furniture. Then it was a gift of delicious chocolate when they came back from France and a home cooked meal when I was too busy to make it myself. I found his eyes tracing my body more often, lingering in certain places. He sometimes stood just a little too close to me while I did the dishes. He wore a shirt less often and I greedily drank in his body when I could. None of this escaped Wade’s notice. I knew he was scheming. 

It was a crisp autumn night when I climbed out on the fire escape to settle next to Logan. The cigar smoke was a comfort now, earthy and sweet. We sat in silence for a few moments. Sometimes that was enough for me, just to be in his presence, but not tonight. I shoved my chilly hands deep into the pockets of my jacket. I titled my head, watching his cheeks hollow around the cigar, the ash skittering across his forearm. He didn’t so much as flinch as the hot ash touched him. “Could I try?” I had tried smoking before but had just ended up coughing for a minute straight. He shook his head, watching a bike roll by. 

“Last thing you need is lung cancer.” I tentatively laid my head on his shoulder. He would still sometimes jerk away like I had burned him. This time, he allowed me to sink closer, our thighs pressed against each other. I could feel the heat of him sinking through my clothes.

“Mm, it smells good though.” He takes a long drag, letting the smoke linger in his lungs before letting it out in a puff. A long moment of silence passes. We’ve been slowly circling each other for weeks, all lingering touches and heavy glances. How would he react if I finally did something? Pull away? I knew he and Wade still slept together, Al complained about it enough that I couldn’t escape it. Wade and I hadn’t really gone beyond our kisses. Despite what he called himself on my phone, I didn’t want this to be a friends with benefits situation. He seemed to know that and hadn’t pushed for more. Wade made it very clear to the both of us that he has no qualms about sharing. If anything, I think he wants Logan and I to have sex more than he wants to have sex with me.

Steeling my resolve, I rest my chin on his shoulder. “Can I try a taste?” Logan glanced down at me, that crease reappearing between his eyebrows. 

“What?” His voice is dry, a touch on edge. I wanted to apologize for my flirting and run but I can’t allow myself to. My fingers trace the corner of his lip, the edge of his jaw. He turned just an inch closer to me and I’m able to take in his lined and handsome face. 

“Just one taste?” It comes out breathy, barely audible. But he hears it, he always does. There’s the faintest tick at the corner of his lips like he was going to smile. “I promise to be gentle,” now that got a smirk out of him. 

“You don’t scare me sweetheart,” his voice was a low rumble. 

“Then why haven’t you kissed me yet?” He pressed the still burning cigar onto his palm. The smell of burning flesh floated up to me and my nose twitched at it. “Why would you-“ but the words are cut off as his unburned palm cupped the back of my neck and dragged me closer, our lips pressing together. The kiss is chaste. My eyes fall shut, a surprised gasp leaving me. His beard scratches lightly at my face as we move our heads. But then he nudges my nose, tilting his head back. “No, please,” I whispered, chasing his lips. I felt his sigh ghost across my face before he cupped both cheeks and drew me back against his mouth. I moan against him, clutching at the front of his sweatshirt, wanting him closer, craving it. Then his lips are moving against mine. My hands slide into his hair and give the strands a tug. His mouth parts on a growl and I take the opportunity to lick my way in. I can taste the tang of whiskey, the sweetness of the cigar, a hint of mint. I want to crush myself against him, to feel his body against mine, to explore his skin. 

Just as I’m reaching under his sweatshirt, hungry for the feel of the torso that’s been haunting me, he withdraws. His breath still coasts across my face and my nose was full of the scent of him. My breath was ragged while his was perfectly even. Embarrassing. My eyes are slow to open. I found him only a few inches away, a smug expression on his handsome face.

“There,” he whispers, “got your taste.”

“Asshole.” Now he smiles, perfect teeth glinting in the streetlight. 

“Yeah, get that in your pretty head now.” His calloused fingers tapped at my temple. “I’m not someone to get attached to.” 

“Well she’s sticking around me and I’m about as much boyfriend material as sandpaper.” I jumped nearly out of my skin at the sound of Wade’s voice. Logan just smirked and circled his hands around my wrists, squeezed once to make me let go of his sweatshirt. I had half a mind to refuse, crawl into his lap and kiss every inch of skin I could find. But I let my hands fall weakly to my lap. “When you two fuck, can you record it? I’ve tried finding look-alikes on pornhub, but it’s just not the same.” I huffed, glancing down at where Wade’s head was, a spark of annoyance at him interrupting Logan and I. He’s half laying on the metal grate, his legs dangling off the couch beneath the window. 

“Ain’t gonna happen dickwad.” I can hear Logan’s lighter flicking before the smell of the cigar is back. I hoped he had just meant recording and that gruff tone wasn’t for the idea of us having sex. But he let me remain close so I took that as a good sign. 

“Don’t listen to him, baby bunny. Look, he literally tried killing me and we ended up fucking in the end.” 

“Was still trying to kill you,” Logan growls. Wade gasps dramatically, clutching his chest like Logan actually succeeded.

“Don’t lie peanut! What’s more romantic than stabbing me in the neck? That Honda Odyssey was shaking all night.” 

“I hope that’s not how you plan on being romantic with me,” I laughed, reaching down to tug at Wade’s cheek. “I can’t snap back like you two.” 

“Of course not darling,” he covered my hand in sloppy kisses, sucking a hickey on my wrist. “I’ll let you stab me in the neck while you fuck me. Would never want to hurt that sexy face.” 

“Ugh, get a room you two,” Logan snapped, nudging my knee with his. I glanced back at him but found his face reserved again. As much as I wanted to linger and force my time on Logan, I knew he wouldn’t appreciate it.

“We should take Mary Puppins out, yeah?” Wade nodded, wiggling free of his awkward position. The decrepit dog came bounding around the corner. She wiggled her naked butt as Wade grabbed her leash. I looked back at Logan. He was determinately ignoring me, eyes locked onto the dark apartment across the way. “I’ll probably head home once that’s done.” He nodded and brought the cigar back to his lips. “Why did you put it out on your hand?”

“Didn’t want to drop it on you. It’s a nasty burn.” There was something fleeting and tender that passed over his averted face. A little smile spread across my face. 

“Thank you, you’re my hero.” I pressed a kiss to his stubbly cheek, lingering just a beat too long, before I pulled away. “Goodnight Logan.” I didn’t wait for his reply, if he even intended to give one. 

Wade was happy with the progress me and Logan had made. 

But it wasn’t fast enough. 

Which is how I found myself locked in their shared cramped bathroom, Wade’s head buried between my legs, while two of his fingers plunged inside me. My legs were shaking, my heel pressed against his shoulder to spread me open more. “Wade,” I whimpered as tears pricked my eyes. He had already drawn one orgasm from me with his rough and agile fingers before he dropped to his knees. “I c-can’t.” 

“I know you can honey bun.” His breath was hot against my tender skin and I gasped. “Just one more for me, yeah?” I nodded, hips grinding against him. “There you go. You’re close again aren’t you?” I nodded again, eyes rolling back. He kitten licked across my overly sensitive clit. I knew I was making a mess of his face but he seemed to revel in it. He left a trail of sticky kisses along my bruised and bitten thigh. “Do you hear yourself? Got that WAP.” I smacked his head before pushing him deeper to keep him from running his mouth more. He latched back onto my clit, sucking harshly, and a third finger wedged into me. My back arched and I had to bite my lip hard to stay quiet. My eyes fell closed. His spare hand moved from my hip where it had been holding me. 

The sudden sound of the door opening made me freeze. Al had laid down for a nap which was the only reason I allowed Wade to drag me in here. But instead I found Logan framed in the doorway. He had the look of a deer in headlights. “Now peanut,” Wade cooed, his head laid against my thigh. to look at the other man. He didn’t stop fingering me, the squelching sounds suddenly too loud. “Don’t you know it’s rude to eavesdrop.” 

“I wasn’t, you two are too fucking loud.” Logan’s nostrils were flared, heaving chest straining against his thin tank top. 

“Uh huh,” Wade teased, his tongue swirling around my clit. My hand clamped over my mouth as a sob caught in my chest. “That massive tent in your pants has nothing to do with you hovering.” Logan growled, palming at himself, seemingly angry at his body. “Come on handsome, look at her.” Wade pushed my thighs farther apart, his free hand spreading me. 

“Oh god,” I mumbled, embarrassment making me cover my face. I couldn’t hear Logan’s steps, he was always so light on his feet, but I could feel him examining me. The hairs at the back of my neck stood on end. 

“Don’t hide from us gorgeous,” Wade chides. “Logan Ioves to watch orgasm faces. I can feel you fluttering, I know you're close.” When I don’t remove my hands, Wade sighs, the exhale of air making my hips jerk. “Come on, you can be brave for us.” I take a shaky breath and remove my hands, curling them around the edge of the counter. Wade smiled while Logan’s dialated eyes were glued to my pussy. I watched his Adam's apple bob and he shifted from one foot to the other. “Good job,” he kissed my clit, popping obscenely. “Now make a mess on my face.”

He dove back between my legs. With Logan there, Wade seemed determined to force me to come as hard and as fast as he could. His fingers drove into me with firm thrusts, tongue flicking cruelly at my clit. My leg was trembling so much it slipped from Wade’s shoulder, only to be caught by Logan. I struggled to focus on him, my vision blurry from prickling tears of overstimulation. His calloused palm traced up my ankle and calf before notching behind my knee. With my pussy covered by Wade’s head, Logan could only look at my face. I wanted him closer, to feel his mouth against mine again, that scrape of his beard. His eyes fastened to my neck, watching my erratic pulse. 

“Logan,” my voice tilts up at the end, hands reaching for him. Before I was able to even breathe, just as the orgasm was rushing through me, Logan’s lips crashed against mine. I clung to him, grabbing fistfuls of his hair and locking both of my shuddering legs around his waist, moaning wildly into his mouth. Wade groaned as his head was pinned between our hips and the vibrations made me cry out. Logan was kissing me like a man starved, biting at my lips, grunting like he was the one coming. A combination of our spit collected at the corner of my mouth and he licked at it hungrily. His blunt nails dug into the tender skin behind my knees as he clutched me closer. Tears streaked down my cheeks as Wade kept working me into near painful overstimulation. 

Logan separated first, his forehead pressed to mine. My breath was ragged, sweat collecting along my hairline. I wanted more, to lose myself between their touches, their bodies. Wade finally stilled, his fingers still buried deep. His mouth released me and I gasped as his harsh breaths coasted across me. “You okay down there?” My voice shook. I reached down and ran my nails across his scalp. 

“Broke my nose, but it’s okay.” I bolted up straight and Logan stumbled back to avoid my head cracking against his. Blood and my slick was smeared across his face, staining his white teeth as he beamed up at me. The tip of his nose was bent at an odd angle. 

“I’m so sorry,” I cupped his face, panic rushing through me. “Are you okay?” 

“He’s fine,” Logan said. One of his big hands braced on Wade’s head before he grabbed the broken nose with two fingers. With a pop and a grunt from Wade, the nose slid back into place. “There,” he tapped Wade’s sticky face, “good as new.” 

“You’re always so nice to me,” Wade grumbled, itching the rapidly healing bump. His drenched fingers slid from me, glistening in the harsh bathroom light. Logan glanced between Wade and I, one finger twirling in the drawstring of his black sweatpants. I wish I could read his mind, be able to tell his emotions from one glance, or a touch. I wanted to understand this unsure look on his face. He almost seemed nervous to be in here now that the haze of lust had passed. He swallowed thickly before he pressed a kiss to my cheek. 

“See you tomorrow sweetheart.” My arms, which were about to latch around his neck to keep him close, hung limply in the air. I blinked as he walked away, disappearing into their dark bedroom. Wade shook his head as he stood and closed the bathroom door. 

“Did I do something?” I whispered, knowing Logan would hear me anyway. Wade’s hands went to my thighs, kneading at the tight muscles, leaving behind wet handprints with his right one. 

“No, he’s just a fucking idiot who doesn’t think he deserves happiness. I’ve been trying to ease him into this but he’s stubborn.” He turned his head, “and he’s stupid!” I heard their bedroom door snap shut. “He’s worried he’ll scare you off. Just give him time. He’s just…just had a lot happen to him.” I nodded. “Don’t take it personally, okay?” 

“Okay,” I mumbled. 

“Are you two done in there?!” A cane hit the door. “She needs to read me my mail!” 

Never more in my life have I wanted the floor to swallow me whole. Only compounded by Wade wiping the door open, cocking his hip to glare at his roommate. I knew she was blind, that she had completely lost vision almost twenty years ago. But that didn’t stop me from stretching my shirt down to try and cover myself, crossing my legs. “I see Miss sleepy granny pants is awake. What do you need? A diaper change?” Al scoffed, her cane clicking along the floorboards of the hallway as she moved to the kitchen. Once she was out of our sight, Wade plucked my panties from the floor. 

“Why?” He shrugged, an evil glint in his eyes. 

“Maybe I need to get him used to your scent, like a dog.” I rolled my eyes but bit back a hiss as he dragged the coarse material through my wet folds. “Need a lot of it I think, yeah, nice and soaked.” I shoved his hand away and he tucked my panties into his pocket. Wade helped me off the counter, his hands braced on my waist to keep me steady. My jeans had been tossed carelessly to the side and I dreaded putting them back on without the barrier of my underwear. “Don’t worry, I won’t make you wear those pesky jeans, even if they do make your ass look so good I want to rip them off you every time you wear them.” He passed through the bathroom and into his and Logan’s room. I peeked around the edge of the door frame and nearly fainted at the sight. 

Logan was splayed across their dark sheets, body bare, hard cock in his hand. While the room was dim, the beams of light from the hallway were able to reach in. The shadows played over his muscles and I watched as they flexed. I wasn’t able to see his cock well, both his hand and the poor lighting limited my vision. But I was able to see a long, thick vein along the underside. My face heated at the sight of him. “Knock, asshole,” his voice was husky. The sound of him made my toes curl. If I hadn’t just had a mind melting orgasm, I would have been striding into that room, ready to do anything he wanted me to. His stomach fluttered as his strokes became more rapid. 

“Here,” Wade said as he tossed my drenched panties on Logan’s face. His hips jerked, knuckles flashing white around himself. Wade searched through a drawer before pulling something from inside. “Now be good and keep those right there for when I come back.” Logan growled, removing the fabric from his face but kept it clutched in his fist. Wade blew him a kiss and a wave before closing the door again. He offered me a pair of sweatpants. I tugged them on with a mumbled thank you, having to roll the waistband down multiple times so I wasn’t swimming in them. Wade pinched my chin and our eyes locked. “I’ll get him to warm up, promise.” I nodded. “Now go take care of Miss Migoo. Remember to text me when you get home.” 

“Of course,” I stood on my toes to kiss his healed nose. “I’m sorry about that.” 

“Don’t worry babykins. If it makes you feel better, I was near suffocation. So a busted nose was the best case scenario.” He laughed at my horrified expression. “Hey, I’d much rather die from pussy smothering than my heart being ripped out.” 

“You know, that doesn’t make me feel much better.” He smirked and drew me closer, his lips connecting with mine. I could taste the tang of me coating him. But I pulled back first. I needed to keep my head on straight for the last hour of my time with Al. “Keep it down with him, please? It’ll be too distracting.” His expression turned wicked. 

“Trust me, I have a way I’ll shut him up.” His hands coasted down my hips, grabbing a handful of my ass. “I’ll send pictures of what happens to your cute little panties once we’re done with them.” My face flushed and I pressed my hands to his chest. 

“God, you’re such a pervert.” 

“Mhm, you like it though.” 

“Will you two stop! My vision isn’t coming back anytime soon.” We reluctantly broke apart. Wade slipped into the bedroom. I was only able to catch a brief glimpse of Logan’s back arched, heels dug deep into the mattress, before my sight was cut off. I grabbed my discarded jeans and stuffed them into the tote bag I had brought with me. The last bit of my shift ended in mostly silence, minus the occasional creak of the bed frame from the guy’s bedroom. I helped Al sign a few checks, read through her mail, and took out Mary Puppins. I said my good night and left the apartment. My mind conjured up thoughts on what could be happening behind that closed door all the way home on the train. Wade, clad only in my stolen underwear, bouncing on Logan. My panties stuffed into Logan’s mouth as Wade pounds him from behind. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to stop my imagination from getting too wild. It wouldn’t help anything to get turned on now. 

If my mind hadn’t been so filled with dirty thoughts, I would have noticed the man watching me from the other end of the train car.  

I made it to my apartment. The key fob scanner was broken again. “Advanced security my ass,” I groaned, trudging up to my apartment. It was Friday and I felt like ordering something in. I knew I shouldn’t, the delivery fees were astronomical, but I just wanted to relax. After placing my pizza order, I grabbed a fresh pair of underwear and a shirt stolen from Logan by Wade, then gifted to me. It always felt illegal to wear it, but it was easily the softest shirt I had. His scent lingered on it and it always soothed me. I had around an hour before my pizza was going to arrive. I made a little nest for myself on the couch and tucked in to watch some mindless reality tv. 

A knock woke me up. At first I was confused, rubbing at my eyes and looking around to locate the sound. Then my mind caught up. “Oh shit,” I mumbled, scrambling to the door as the poor delivery guy knocked again. “Sorry! Sorry!” I called. I unlocked the door and swung it open. 

I froze. 

A man, with no pizza box, stood before me. “Um, can I help you?” The man had ice chips for eyes, cold and lifeless. A tattoo peaked above his collar. He took me in, tracing each inch of me. I felt my skin break out in goosebumps at the cold calculation on his face. My arms curled over my chest, hiding it from him. “Can I help you?” My tone was stronger, a small snap to it. That horrible gaze found mine again. Then he said my full name. Fear oozed through me. 

I heard something from my bedroom, a little thump, but was too terrified to look away from the man in front of me. “Get the fuck out of here,” but the words lacked conviction, a slight tremble to them. “I don’t know who you are. Leave or I’m calling the cops.” 

“Why wouldn’t you call your boyfriends?” My heart stuttered in my chest. 

“I don’t know who you’re talking about.” I heard the creak of my floorboard. I cast a wild glance behind me and found a wall of a man emerging from my bedroom. I went to scream but the man at my door latched his hand around my mouth. I kicked and thrashed, biting wildly. He didn’t react. There was a pinch in my neck. 

My elbows tried to find his face, but he was able to easily deflect them. The man in my apartment was searching for something. My eyes were blurring, limbs turned to lead. I saw him hold my phone up. 

Then I slumped to the ground.

[noblechaton]

hiya. bit of a personal post here that's been a long time coming but

a while back now my younger sibling finally got an issue properly diagnosed as a lung disease and as such, she requires a double lung transplant - my family is asking for help through this gofundme page here. it'd mean the world to me if y'all help her out in one way or another, be it donating any amount or just reblogging this post around so that others might

a lil more detail on things under the cut

basically she'd had this persistent cough for a while and tho she'd gone to the doctor a few times about it, they wrote it off each time as allergies or something stupid without really looking at her - until a few months ago now when she finally went to urgent care, then to a proper emergency room and they discovered that her lungs were essentially ruined. idk if they ever discerned by what exactly but it doesn't really matter at this point as her breathing is heavily restricted and her heart is kinda working overtime

the good news is that she's been on oxygen for a bit and she's also on the waitlist for the transplant already - but the call for it can come at basically anytime between now and next year, meaning my family kinda has to stay ready at a moment's notice which is what this gofundme is for - to help them now, when the time comes, and afterwards, as the situation is as u can imagine very stressful and demanding of all of us, especially of her

but she's been brave, strong. and she hasn't deserved any of this, given just how good a person she is. how much she's tried to help others, to do for others, to keep our family together. I honestly have no idea how she's kept her smile up for as long as she has and I've struggled with making this post in large part bc of how paintful it's been to see her go thru that which she never asked for, that she truly doesn't deserve. she's struggled, it's been hard, but she's still going all the same

so I feel it my responsibility to at least try and help her out beyond the day to day odds and ends and perhaps use whatever audience I somehow have to lend her a hand as she needs it most. so again please if you are in a position where u can donate - consider dropping some at this link here, any amount helps right now and even if u can't, reblogging to get the word around would help a bit too

thank u to those of u who read this and donate or even just share the post/link around - I truly, deeply appreciate any help my family can get

[bunnysbrainrot]

Blood Flow

Kinktober Prompt: Choking

Relationship: dbf!Joel Miller x Reader

Content: [i was going for something sensual and i failed.] Explicit sexual scenes, fingering, choking, squirting, praise kink, Joel’s kinda rough, teasing. No outbreak AU.

Summary: You curiously tread into the realm of choking, but you have no clue why people think it feels ‘good’. With Joel’s help, you realize that there’s simply a right way to do it.

A/N: pay attention to the last line. it implies exactly what you think it does. **ALSO! part 3 for this is out, it’s called Daddy’s Girl!

this scene is so weird, why is he choking her???

Your fingers flitted across your phone screen, texting as you watch a new show. In this scene, the two main characters finally broke their tension, and things were growing heavy. You watched the actor’s hand wrap around his costar’s throat, watching how her face contorted in bliss.

Cause it feels good, sweetheart, Joel replied.

Bringing your own hand to your neck, you pressed against your windpipe and choked, like really choked, but it didn’t feel like you thought it would. And your face definitely did not make those same expressions as the woman in the show.

Clearing your throat, you replied to Joel. A few years ago, this kind of conversation would earn you an intervention with your parents. This was your dad’s best friend, and you shouldn’t be texting him about being choked, of all things.

But fuck, was texting Joel a wonderful time.

A single message could have you squeezing your thighs together. Every baby girl, sweetheart, and honey was imagined in his voice as if he were there, whispering them into your ear. You would imagine his fingers dancing across your skin as he showered you with those sweet pet names.

tried it on myself, and i can confirm that it feels awful. coughing my lungs out right now

Joel read your text and let out a hearty chuckle, quickly replying back. He knew you were a tad… inexperienced with things like this, and that you wouldn’t ask just anyone about this. He had you wrapped around his finger, as you did him.

Baby doll, you’re probably pressing on your windpipe. It’s a little tricky to do it on yourself

You groaned at the text, still frustrated at your little mishap. The reply you gave him was rather bold, but you anxiously sent it anyway.

maybe you could show me

The two of you had flirted a lot more since you came back home from college. Four years of hard schoolwork had you taking a break back home with your parents to choose your next big step in life. At first it started small - little compliments on your clothes, on your intelligence, on how much you’d come into your own. Your glances at Joel lasted too long to be friendly, and it didn’t help when you ran your foot along his leg under the table at big family dinners.

In short, you were driving each other absolutely wild, pulling the tension taught between you, waiting for it to snap.

But Joel wanted to go slow. This was dangerous territory, and he needed to take his time.

Maybe I could

You stared blankly at the phone screen, reading over the message with a fluttering heart behind your ribs. A wave of warmth spread over you with a beeline between your thighs. You clenched your legs together as you texted Joel back.

right now?

J: Door’s unlocked, I’m just watching TV. If you want to join me we can watch that show you were telling me about

Like an alarm went off you shot out of bed, hurrying to your dresser and closet to find a more impressive outfit. Joel wouldn’t care all that much - he liked seeing you in anything. It didn’t matter how much or little you had on, you were always beautiful to him.

headed out now!

Joel have a swift reply that buzzed in your pocket.

Someone’s eager.

You trekked over to the neighborhood next to yours, practically skipping with each step up to Joel’s house. Thankfully, his daughter, Sarah, would be at a friend’s house this evening, leaving you and Joel all to yourselves.

Joel’s head perked up when he heard you knock. He, almost too excitedly, shot up from the couch and headed to the front door.

He was an effortlessly handsome man. And now, in a simple pair of sweatpants and v-neck shirt, he looked more stunning than ever. For you, it also didn’t matter what he wore - he always looked handsome.

“Hi,” you said, offering him a small smile.

Joel raised an arm and leaned against the doorframe. His lean muscles shifted under his tan skin, hardened by those years under the Texas sun, and caught the light from inside to accentuate his bicep. He caught you ogling, and laughed.

“Sweetheart, I’m not just eye candy,” Joel’s voice was soft after the long day he had, “You comin’ in, or what?”

Your smile widened as you stepped in, dipping under Joel’s arm to step in the living room. He had already closed the blinds preemptively to shield yourselves from any prying eyes. You sat on the couch and waited for Joel to join you.

He slowly made his way over, “So, what show were you watchin’?”

You sighed dramatically, “Well, now it’s just embarrassing. We can watch something else, instead.”

Joel shook his head at your offer, gesturing to the TV, “Not embarrassing at all. ‘Sides, I got a plan for it.”

He snatched the remote from the arm of the couch and chose a spot right next to you. After a series of questions, you began to play the show you’d seen, found the right episode, and played the scene in question.

Joel remained silent the entire time, glancing between you and the TV. His stare bore into you, but it was unclear as to what was going through his mind.

But the scene, to your relief, ended, and the shyness you’d felt could be over. Joel paused the show in the middle of the next scene and finally met your eyes.

“Alright, I think I know where ya went wrong,” he commented. You cocked an eyebrow at him.

“It’s all about controlling the blood flow, not pressin’ on the windpipe. That’s a one way ticket to the man upstairs,” Joel laughed and brought his hand to your cheek, cupping your face carefully. His thumb passed over your cheekbone before he shifted down toward your neck.

He placed his thumb and index finger on either side of your throat, right under your jaw. The pressure was uncomfortable at first, pressing into you in a way that sparked some faint nausea. You cleared your throat and swallowed to dull the feeling.

“Pressin’ here,” his grip tightened, “reduces the blood flow. It’s still a lil’ hard to breathe, but it doesn’t risk your safety.”

A lightness began to creep through you as Joel pressed into your throat. Blackness clouded the edge of your vision, blurring Joel’s features, though you could barely make out a lazy smile.

After a few long seconds, he let go, and you could freely breathe once again. The rush of blood back to your brain throbbed at your temples, though the brief headache was nothing compared to the rush of pleasure it delivered.

To your surprise, the rush went straight to your core, leaving you shifting your legs together.

Joel leaned forward and planted a kiss on your cheek, his voice was a low whisper.

“See? Feels good when someone does it right, don’t it?”

You nodded, still held securely by his hand around your throat. His lips traveled across your face, to your temples, to your jaw, and finally finding your own, flush and fluid with your own movements. Joel tightened his grip again, and the same rush came flowing through. It was tricky to keep kissing Joel at the pace he set. Instead, your mouth slacked open as a moan escaped you, swallowed eagerly by Joel.

He spoke slowly against your lips, nipping at them between his words.

“How is it, baby doll? Still feel good?”

It was wonderful. Had you not messaged him about this, you would’ve been completely in the dark about this whole new world of pleasure. So wonderful, in fact, that you could feel a new slickness in your sex, about to soak into your panties. Instinctively you ground your hips, pathetically pressing your aching pussy into nothing substantial.

Joel moved his other hand lower, raking over your shifting thighs, “Tell me, sweet girl, does it make you feel good down here?”

His hand cupped your clothed sex, pressing against your slit and slowly massaging your core. Your breath trembled as you gave him another nod - a small sign of permission to take things further.

“Joel… Joel,” you whispered, fighting against his grip on your throat. Amidst the rush going through your head you could barely hold onto what he was saying, let alone reply coherently.

His lips had wandered to your jaw, peppering a trail of kisses around his rough fingers, “What is it, baby girl? Tell me whatcha need.”

You choked out your reply, “In.. inside.”

A low laugh danced across your skin, “That’s my girl. Always needing something fillin’ her up. ‘Least when I’m involved, anyway.”

He pressed harder against your aching sex - the abrasion of the fabric turned you into a whimpering mess in a matter of seconds. You needed more. You needed him.

Joel groaned against your skin when you tugged his hand past the waistband of your pants, pushing him lower toward your core.

“Need me to make you feel good, sweet girl?” his voice thrummed through your chest. You nodded, urging your lungs to take in sweet, fresh air amidst the constriction. Joel loosened his grip ever so slightly, letting you catch your breath.

He hummed against your jaw as he adjusted his hand with his fingers teasingly at your entrance. A single finger played with your wet hole, swirling around carefully, not fully giving you what you need. Not yet.

You mewled a slurred version of his name, eyes rolling back when his grip tightened around your throat.

Joel’s fingers didn’t stop, but rather pushed further, sinking past your soaked folds and into your tight pussy. A small whimper from you made him smile, carefully eyeing you as he moved his fingers, curling them up to brush your sweet spot.

“Joel… fu-fuck,” you choked.

His fingers plunged deeper into your warm cunt, curling harshly to draw a long-awaited moan. Until now, Joel hadn’t had the joy of hearing you utter anything above a whisper.

You cried out, straining against his grip, but was sent back to fighting for that sacred blood flow back to your brain.

You brought your hand up to meet the one at your neck, tapping against the back of his hand. A beat passed before Joel realized the mistake. He swiftly released you and cradled your head, slowing his movements between your thighs.

“Sorry,” you rasped, “that was just a little too hard. I couldn’t really make any noise without coughing.”

Joel leaned forward and pressed his lips to yours. He broke away with the softest tone you’d heard all night.

“You ain’t got nothin’ to apologize for, honey,” he replied, spreading his kisses to your cheeks. “Got a little too ahead of myself there.”

He kissed you until you were left breathless and panting. By now your lips were plump from the bites and nips Joel had given them.

“Maybe we could try a different position, whaddya say?”

After a beat of thought, you nod in agreement and follow his lead. He removed his hand from your pants, lightly sucking at his soaked fingers, and moaning at your taste across his tongue.

This was the closest he’d been to truly tasting you. Words escaped him as he tried to describe the feeling of heaven on his very lips.

You stood from the couch and watched Joel taste yourself on his fingers. He was completely entranced, and monitoring your every movement as you waited for his direction.

Darkness filled his eyes, “Y’might need to take those pants off, sweetheart. Need a good angle for this.”

Now right in front of his legs, you urged Joel to spread them apart and stood between them.

He took this as a silent request for his help. Joel gave you a smile and sat forward, letting his hands climb up your thighs, taking their sweet time to cover as much of them as he could.

Joel hooked his fingers on your waistband and gently tugged, unwrapping you like it was Christmas morning.

Your bottoms dropped to your ankles, and all was left was your soaked panties, the last barrier between Joel and what he’d wanted to see most. Joel leaned further, leaving a trail of kisses from your mid-thigh to your hip, alternating to the other side. Each touch of his lips set you ablaze. His gentle touches paled in comparison to the heat roiling through your belly, trickling right down to your aching pussy.

At long last he peeled your panties off of you, slowly sending them down your legs until they joined your pants. Your lower half was bare for him now; you were a gift unwrapped, the best present he could’ve asked for.

“Christ,” Joel muttered. His eyes scanned over your half naked form, giving you a curious look at your chest.

He wanted nothing more than to wander up there, letting his hands dip below the fabric and slide up to your chest. Your tits were selfishly hidden from him, with your perfect, perk nipples poking through, enticing him to search for more.

You wrapped your legs on either side of him, pushing Joel back against the couch so you could get into position. His legs stayed spread open, thus making you open yours across his.

Spread perfectly wide for whatever he had planned for you.

Joel cupped the back of your neck and pulled you in for another kiss, working his hands over your thighs in the process. You could feel a couple of damp fingertips from where he’d fingered you before. Those same fingers now crept toward your needy hole, teasing you ever so slowly.

You bucked your hips and positioned them over his hand, whining at the lack of touch.

“Joel, please,” you mumbled, keeping your lips in tandem with his own. Joel grumbled out a reply you couldn’t discern before a hand made its way to your throat.

Joel pressed down on either side of your windpipe to deliver that sweet head rush of elation.

“I’ve got you, baby girl, I’ll take care of you.”

And that, he did. His hands moved with pure greed at your neck and pussy, sending two fingers up into your tight cunt. You cried out against his lips as he slowly pumped into you.

“That’s it, sweet girl. Let it all out.”

You were relieved you could make at least a little noise. It was better than it was at home, where you’d spent countless nights touching yourself, moaning against your hand or a nearby pillow.

But here… here you could cry out as Joel touched you. You could freely show him how good he was making you feel.

You let out a soft whine, but it was not well-received by Joel.

“I wanna hear you, baby.”

A louder moan drew from your throat. Joel’s fingers curled inside of you, pressing into the spongy part right past your entrance. Your walls fluttered gently around his fingers, pulling him in further.

“Fuck, you’re tight,” said Joel, still mumbling against your lips. You offered him a smile, proud that your body was to his liking. It was all you’d hoped for, to be perfect for him.

“Not sure how this little pussy’s gonna handle me, though,” he continued in a cocky voice. “But I think you could do it.”

He curled his fingers harshly, causing you to slur your words together. Something about Joel, and harder, and please.

“Such a good girl. Bet you’d take anything I gave you, huh?”

You nodded slightly, constricted under his grip to move any further.

Joel pushed his fingers deeper, picking up his pace until the wet sounds of your ravaged cunt filled the room. Your juices flowed from your pussy and onto his hand, leaking down from his fingers to his palm, pooling your sweet slick before it trickled to the floor below.

His pace became relentless, though the grip on your throat loosened. You let out a shuddering moan as he furiously pumped his fingers, making your cunt squelch with the most obscene sounds you’d ever heard.

“Attagirl,” Joel praised, “Just keep still. I gotcha.”

The reassuring tone kept you conflicted - it totally contrasted from what he was doing to your body.

Fuck, if this is how it was with just his hands alone, you silently prayed that you could handle what else he could give you.

There was a new tightness in your abdomen, pooling around in your sex, but it was a deeper sort of pressure you’d never felt. It felt like…

“Joel,” you protested, “I think I gotta pee.”

He laughed against your lips, “Just work with me here, darlin’.”

You squirmed on his hand as this new sensation spread through your pussy. This kind of pressure wasn’t something you could’ve gotten from your own hand, let alone any toy.

No, this was the masterful work of Joel Miller’s fingers, unraveling you around him.

He struck deeper, twisting his wrist to get a better angle, curling each thick digit against your sweet spot. You choked on a gasp as the pressure in your abdomen built, threatening to break apart.

With a flurry of swift motion the tension broke, and a beautiful symphony sounded - the rush of your juices that poured onto his hand, the strangled moan that fell from your slacked mouth, followed by the pleased groan Joel drew out.

“What… hah… was that..?” you panted. Joel kissed your cheekbone as he worked you through your high.

“Did I just… did I sq-“ you could barely make out the word.

“You did. And you did such a good job, sweet girl.”

The praise roiled through your gut. A soreness flooded through your sex, trailing toward your cervix. You swallowed nervously at the thought of anything bigger, and what it could do to your insides.

Joel slowed his pace and released the hand that had been trained to your neck. You both worked through your climax, coming down smoothly to where you now laid slumped against Joel’s chest.

His hands still roved over your skin, gently kneading your ass and thighs as you caught your breath.

“How you feelin’, honey?” his Southern drawl intoxicated his words with a sickly sweetness.

You pressed your face into the crook of his neck a let out a small, content mmm, taking in his scent. The mix of his cologne and sweat sent something possessive through you, to have this all for yourself. It felt too selfish for that pining to be one-sided - for you to want him as much as you did, without knowing if he held the same ferocity about you as you did him.

“Thirsty.”

“I bet. That’ll take a lot outta ya - let’s get a glass of water and getcha cleaned up.”

You worked your legs off of his thighs and stood shakily. After sitting in that awkward position and having your senses scrambled, your knees buckled beneath your weight, desperately trying to hold your quivering thighs steady.

“Hold on, sweetheart, I’ve gotcha,” Joel said, swiftly standing on steady feet. You pouted at the unfairness - his hands tore at your sex and left you trembling while he was perfectly fine.

“You better not laugh at me,” you snapped, though the drained tone in your words had Joel chucking slightly.

He held you steady with both hands and led you toward the kitchen, “You look like you got a hip replacement.”

“You’re nearing that age, aren’t you?” you quipped. Joel gave you a firm smack on your ass as his reply.

“Better watch it, I don’t do well with brats.”

hi y’all! thank you so much for reading and supporting, and happy Kinktober!

If you’re looking for the part 3 of this, it’s called Daddy’s Girl! I would love if you gave it a read

ily xoxo

[happilykrispypirate]

Bloodstained Petals

Pairings: Mattheo Riddle x fem!reader

Warnings: Swearing, unrequited love, mentions of blood and throwing up, violence, death, and my shitty writing.

Summary: The Hanahaki Disease is a rare disease that causes flowers to grow in the person's lungs. The only way to stop it from killing the person, is to get the one they're in love with, to fall in love with them.

-

Y/n sighed as she watched as Mattheo make an advance on the girl he's been keen on for the last 2 months.

Theo sighed as he saw the look on the girl's face. He had known about her love for the dickhead since the beginning.

Y/n, you're making things harder for yourself," He finally spoke up.

"What's wrong with me?" She asked the question she's been asking him for years now.

"There's nothing wrong with you, love," Theo said, "He's just a fucking idiot."

Y/n sighed again, looking down at her food, feeling too sick to even think about eating anything.

"I'm going to bed, I'll see you tomorrow at breakfast," She said before getting up and walking out.

"I need the room tonight," Mattheo said when he came back to the table, "Where's Y/n?"

"You're a fucking idiot," Theo said also getting up to try and catch up with her, but she was already gone.

-

Y/n woke up in the middle of the night, coughing up her lungs. She ran to the bathroom to get her something to drink so that she'd stop coughing.

After downing a glass or two of water, her stomach churned. She quickly bent over the toilet and threw up.

Her heart sank with fear as she saw the blood and the petals. She then started coughing again, more petals.

Next thing she knew she stormed to the Gryffindor common room, ignoring the fat lady's whining about waking her up, and she ran straight to Hermione's room.

"Thank Merlin, you're awake," Y/n said.

"What's wrong?" Hermione asked worriedly as she looked at the panicked girl.

As if on cue another coughing fit started and petals landed in het hand.

"Are those?"

"Yeah."

"Oh my God," Hermione said, "You have the Hanahaki Disease."

"You say that like I'm supposed to know what it means," Y/n said as she threw the petals into the bin.

"Hanahaki Disease, is caused by unrequited love."

Y/n stayed silent. She brought this upon herself... falling in love with Mattheo.

"It's very rare. It causes a flower to grow in your lungs. The only way to stop it, is to..."

"Is to what?" Y/n asked, looking at Hermione.

"Is to get the person you're in love with, to fall in love with you. They can't just say I love you, and it'll be gone. They have to actually mean it," She said.

"I'm doomed," Y/n said as she sat down on Hermione's bed.

"Y/n," Hermione said. Her words were cut short when Y/n went into another coughing fit. She patted Y/n on the back, to help in whatever way she can.

Y/n then ran to the bathroom to throw up. Hermione ran after her to hold her hair back.

"We have to get you to Madam Pomfrey," Hermione said.

"No, I don't want anyone else to know about this," Y/n said, "Especially not Mattheo or Theo."

"Y/n if you don't do something, you're going to die," She said.

Y/n didn't answer her...

-

Over the next few days everyone noticed that she looked a bit sick. Professor McGonagall had sent her to her dorm after she had ran out of the classroom for the third time that lesson.

So, Y/n, just laid there in her bed and stared up at the ceiling. Her room littered with petals.

Theo had tried to come by a few times every day, but she made sure he couldn't come in.

She had Hermione put a charm on her door after Pansy walked in and saw Y/n coughing up petals. Y/n tried to lie her way out of, but Pansy knew immediately what it was. So now, the only people who can enter her dorm, was Pansy and Hermione.

As Y/n laid on her bed, she heard a soft knock on her door. She thought it was Theo, but when the spoke she knew she thought wrong.

Matheo.

"Y/n, I'm just checking in on you. Are you alright?" He was silent for a few moments, "Theo says you won't even let him in."

"Please, I need to know if you're alright," He said, "You're my best friend, I care about you."

The word 'friend' echoed in her mind for the rest of the day. She was only pulled out of her thoughts when she heard Theo yelling at Hermione.

"Why can't I fucking see her?" He yelled.

"Theo, she's not feeling well," Hermione said, "She said she doesn't want to get you sick."

"You and Pansy are in there every day!" He yelled again.

"Hermione," Y/n spoke, her voice raspy. Her throat was raw because of the coughing. She was weak due to the amount of blood she lost and the lack of oxygen.

Hermione's head poked through the door, "Let him in," Y/n said. She knew she didn't have a lot of time left, so she knew she had to tell him.

Hermione nodded, glad that she was finally telling Theo.

Hermione closed the door and lifted her wand. A few moments later, she turned towards Theo and nodded her head towards the door.

Theo didn't hesitate to storm in. He stopped dead in his tracks as he saw how sick his best friend was.

He saw the petals, and immediately knew about what she had and why she had it.

"Holy fuck, love," Theo said as he knelt down next to her.

"Hey Theo," She smiled weakly.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked. Tears were in her eyes; he feared for her life.

"I didn't want to worry you too much," She said.

"You still worried me, love," He said as he took her hand and kissed it.

"I'm sorry," Y/n said, her eyes starting to droop.

"Get some rest, love," Theo said, "I'll be here when you wake up."

Y/n took her hand out of his and placed it on his cheek. A tear fell from his cheek, she wiped it away with her thumb before she closed her eyes.

Theo stayed for a few minutes. He thought, how could someone do this to her.

The anger consumed him. He made sure Y/n was comfortable before he stomped off to find Mattheo.

-

He found Mattheo with that girl. He pulled him up by the collar and pinned him to the wall.

"You motherfucker, you did this to her. She's dying because of you're fucking selfishness," Theo spat in his face.

"What the fuck man?" Mattheo said, "Who's dying?"

Theo said nothing, he dropped Mattheo on the floor before dragging him to Y/n's dorm.

Theo opened up the door and saw Hermione standing over you. She had her wand out, she was examining you.

"Y/n?" Mattheo said. His heart sank. He saw the blood, the petals. He knew.

It was because of him?

"This is all your fault. She's been in love with you for a long time, but you didn't even bother thinking about her. You made it seem like you love her but then you go after other girls," Theo said.

"I've always loved her. I just thought she didn't love me," Mattheo said.

"It's always been you."

They both looked up and saw that Y/n was looking at them. Or, Mattheo.

Mattheo went over to her, and crouched beside her bed.

"I'm so sorry I did this to you," He said, "I love you, I really do love you."

"I love you too, Mattheo," She said, smiling weakly at him. He leaned forward and planted his lips on hers. Neither of them caring about the blood and tears.

They both pulled away when another coughing fit started. Mattheo placed his hand on her back and rubbed circles.

"Why isn't she better?" Theo asked, "Shouldn't she be cured now?"

"I'm afraid, it's too late," Hermione said as tears ran down her cheeks. Pansy stood to the side, trying not to get lost in the tears.

Both the boys' hearts sank. She looked at them both.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner," She said.

"It's alright, love," Theo said as he too crouched down next to her bed, taking her other hand.

"I'll always be with you," She said, "I love you both."

"No, don't say that, you're not dying," Mattheo said, "I finally got to tell you I love you. You're not leaving me now."

She smiled at him, tears running down her cheeks.

She let go of her last breath.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no," Mattheo begged sobbing. He lifted her up and held her to his chest as he rocked back and forth, sobbing into her hair.

Theo sobbed as he held her hands. His best friend since childhood gone.

Hermione held Pansy as they both cried.

"Don't leave me, please, don't leave me," Mattheo's voice cracked as he begged with every sob.

He blamed himself, he was too late.

[ashwhowrites]

Dungeons and Revenge

Plot- Eddie finds out the new guy in Hellfire is dating his ex girlfriend

Eddie watched intensely as he rolled his dice, along with Hellfire. The dice dinged against the table, all the boys standing up from their seats as they waited for it to land.

"THAT'S A HIT!" Eddie declared

The boys cheered as they defeated the dragon, ending the campaign for the night.

"HELL YES!" Mike cheered, high-fiving Dustin.

"Good game, boys. Until next time." Eddie said. The boys began packing up, and Eddie walked over to his newest member, Justin.

"J-man, amazing play," Eddie said, patting him on the shoulder. Justin smiled and stood up.

"Thanks, Eddie. Great campaign. It was sick to see all the dragons break apart and force us to save ourselves yet help each other."

Justin had been a member for a little over a month and Eddie hated to admit he was damn good. Not as good as Eddie though, no one ever was.

Eddie was always skeptical of letting new people join, but Justin earned his place and Eddie was starting to like him. He was a senior, a bit taller and more muscular than Eddie. Much shorter hair but just as dark, and a lighter shade of brown eyes.

The group all walked out into the parking lot, still talking about the amazing ending of the night. The conversation faded into the background when Eddie spotted a similar car in the parking lot.

"I was positive I was going to die once the monster spotted me," Dustin said, Mike added on but Eddie was still lost in staring at the parked car. He knew that car, it was hers. Y/N, his ex-girlfriend, is the girl he was still helplessly in love with.

Their relationship ended over five months ago and he still thought about her. He thought about their stupid fight, her wet eyes, and the loud bang as she slammed the door. He has barely seen her since, she did everything to avoid him. He looked for her everywhere, wanting to beg on his knees for another chance.

"Yo, Eddie you good?" Justin asked, taking Eddie out of his thoughts.

Eddie coughed and tore his eyes away, looking at the group of boys who stopped talking and were looking at him.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm good. Who needs a ride?" Eddie asked, his eyes already looking back at her car.

"Not me, my girlfriend is picking me up," Justin said with a smile. That love-sick puppy looks in his eyes. A look Eddie was familiar with, the one he always had for Y/N.

"Dude! Do you have a girlfriend? Is she hot?" Gareth asked

"We are fairly new, been seeing her for about two weeks. Made it official last night." Justin said with a smile. "And she's the prettiest girl I've ever laid my eyes on."

"What's her name?" Dustin called after him, Justin already walking into the parking lot.

"Y/N," Justin called back.

Eddie felt his blood run cold, and air stopped entering his lungs. He felt like he was suffocating. All the boys knew Y/N was a touchy subject, and they feared for Eddie's reaction.

They all watched as he walked to the familiar car. A car Eddie spent many times in, so many memories flashed through his head; their first kiss through her window, their first time having sex in the backseat, and where he admitted he loved her.

Eddie tried to fight back tears and failed. A few tears ran down his face as Justin was in the passenger seat. Eddie was thankful he couldn't see her because that would have hurt more. He watched as they drove off, no one knowing what to say.

~

Eddie slammed the trailer door behind him as he raced to his room, storming past a worried Wayne as he locked his bedroom door. He threw his bag on the ground and collapsed on his bed. He screamed into his pillow, and then the screams turned into sobs.

He ignored as Wayne knocked on his door. He couldn't believe she moved on already. He wanted her to be in the same boat as him, he wanted to be the only boy on her mind. But the cold truth showed him he was nowhere in her mind.

He wanted to call, his fingers ghosting over the phone. But then he got a better idea, make her come to him. He wiped his face with his shirt and then grabbed his backpack. He tore it open and grabbed his dnd notebook.

~~~

Eddie was a wreck but tried his best to not show it. He hated that now whenever he saw Justin it hurt, and made him think about her. But he had a plan to get his revenge, to release his anger towards Justin for going after what was his.

The boys were nervous about playing now that they knew Justin was dating Eddie's ex-girlfriend. No one told Justin and he was oblivious to the target on his back. Dustin gulped when he saw the smirk and glint in Eddie's eyes.

~

"Yikes, Justin. Looks like you got hit by Lich again!" Eddie crackled, loving the way the boy groaned.

"Let me get in the room and see if I can help," Mike said.

Justin sighed in relief, hoping the rest of the group could join him as they took turns. But his hope was lost when Lich seemed to only target him. Justin thought hard about what he should do, he raised his shield and began to battle.

The boys watched as Eddie and Justin were going head to head. Justin rolled and was successful, able to use his shield as he struck at Lich.

"Remind me your AC?" Eddie asked, a happy smile on his face as he shook the dice.

"I feel like you would remember since this is the 5th hit in 2 rounds... but it's a 17." Justin sighed, starting to get annoyed that Eddie seemed to only target his player during the whole session.

Eddie nodded, enjoying the way he got Justin riled up. He was acting out of jealousy but so what. Justin is winning in life so Eddie might as well win in the game. Eddie rolled his dice onto the table, standing up to see over his books.

"Good! I rolled an 18." He wasn't afraid to show how smug he was, sitting back down with a cocky smirk.

~

The boys were less excited as they walked out of the session, almost no one spoke. Justin was slightly fuming at Eddie but he'd never challenge the master. But that's what Eddie wanted, he wanted Justin to get in his face. Just anything to give Eddie a reason to sucker punch him right in the nose.

Eddie stayed back, knowing he couldn't stand to see Justin going to her again.

Justin sighed as he got in the car, leaning over to softly peck Y/N's lips.

"How did it go?" Y/N asked, peeling out of the parking lot.

"Ass. I could barely fight back, Eddie kept hitting me from left and right. It almost felt like he was personally attacking me." Justin ranted. He had no idea what he did to piss him off.

Y/N rolled her eyes at Eddie's actions, and a bit of anxiety settled in her stomach as she knew why.

"I don't know what I did to him," Justin added

Y/N offered a small smile and moved her hand to softly rub his thigh as she kept her eyes on the road.

"Eddie used to be a good friend of mine, let me talk to him."

~

Eddie was watching the TV, with the volume on low to not disturb Wayne, when there were a few knocks on the door.

He groaned as he stood up, walking towards the door. He slightly cracked it, and his heart sped up when he saw her.

"Y/N?"

"We need to talk," she said, her arms crossed. Eddie opened the door and she walked past him. He closed the door and followed into his bedroom.

She sat on his bed as he walked in. He wanted to take a mental image of how she looked on his bed again. He walked towards her, softly reaching out to cup her face.

She pushed his hand away, and he gulped. He could already feel himself getting emotional as he continued to look at her.

"It's been so long," he said quietly, "I've missed seeing you."

She shook her head and stood up. Walking to the other side of the room to create more space.

"Why are you being a dick to Justin? He loved being part of Hellfire! And he was really upset tonight."

Eddie rolled his eyes and scoffed.

"He's whining about a game? Oh, come on, baby. It's a fucking game!" Eddie argued

"No, he's upset that you put a target on him and he has no idea why. But me? I've got a good idea why you are acting like a jackass," she fought back. Her eyes were hard but Eddie just loved having her eyes on him again.

"Why's that, sweetheart?" She wanted to smack the smirk off his face. She hated herself for how attracted she still was to him.

Ignoring the way the nicknames made her body heat up, she replied, "You found out about us and you got jealous. Which I'd like to remind you that you have no right to be jealous."

"No right?" Eddie laughed as he scoffed. "I'm fucking in love with you. Still, head over my feet for you, and you're dating some other guy!" His voice started to rise but he wasn't yelling.

"You broke up with me! Did you forget that? Did you remember that when you decided to have your pity party and take it out on a guy who seems to actually like me?" Y/N argued, she wasn't surprised by his behavior but she was surprised she'd still be dealing with it.

"I didn't BREAK UP WITH YOU!" He argued, his voice rising and rising.

"WELL YOU NEVER WENT AFTER ME!" She yelled back, throughout all the fighting they didn't notice how close they became. Their bodies were inches away, chest to chest.

"YOU TOLD ME NOT TO! I DIDN'T WANT TO KEEP SCREWING UP"

"YOU'RE ALWAYS SUPPOSED TO GO AFTER ME. BEG ME AND TELL ME YOU CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT ME!" her voice cracked as her yelling turned into soft sobs, "but yo-ou let me leave, I waited in my car and you never came" she whimpered.

Eddie gulped as he watched the tears fall down her face. He stepped forward, closing any space they had between them. His hands cupped her wet cheeks and he bent slightly down so his eyes were level with hers.

"I wanted to follow you so badly. I wanted to walk up to you anytime I got just a second of you. I've failed many times at not listening to you and I thought I was doing what you wanted. Baby, if I knew all I had to do was run after you I would have run in a heartbeat." He said

She sniffled and tried not to melt into his hands. His touch on her skin and his body inches from hers, it's all she craved those long five months.

"You had five months, Eddie. Why now? Why now when I just started to move on?"

"I'm selfish and can't watch another person make you happy. Not when I know I can. If you want to move on, I can't stop you. But if I can offer exactly what he can, I will do it a thousand times better." He said, and before she could blink his lips pressed against hers.

She melted as his warm lips moved against hers. The similarity of the kiss made her heart flutter. She tried to fight it, her hands on his chest to push. But then his hands moved down to her waist and he pulled away, but just barely.

A broken whisper or whimper, she couldn't tell, fell from his lips and landed on hers,

"Please"

She shoved every thought away that told her it was a bad idea. And listened to the way her heart raced like it only did with him. Her actions were fast, her hands cupping his face as she kissed him as hard as she could.

They moved in perfect synchrony, their lips fit together. They clung to each other desperately, making sure the other couldn't go too far away.

They kissed until their lungs burned, begging for air. She pulled away but kept her touch on him.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for everything. If you give me another chance, I promise, I will always run after you. I'll pick you up kicking and screaming and bring you home." He pleaded.

This was the first time Y/N believed she ever saw Eddie break down and beg. He was always so damn stubborn, but now he cried and pleaded.

"What if you promise not to make me want to run away?" She joked, a tiny laugh leaving her lips. Eddie softly chuckled, sniffling.

"Anything you want and need," he said, softly kissing her lips again.

"What the hell do I tell Justin?" She asked

"I'll write it into the camping," Eddie joked, loving when she swatted at his chest.

Forgiveness is a long road and he was ready to walk it all.

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @thegemaqua @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlxt @ineedmentalhelp123

[harvestleaves]

Beach Day (HangmanxF!Reader)

Summary: F!reader’s asthma is flaring up at the beach and Jake is being a worried mother-hen.

A/N: I was working on this before I received the prompt: Hangman takes care of the person of your choice.  But this fits that prompt perfectly!  Let me know if I should also post this on Ao3!

Rating: G

Word Count: 1,254

Sitting on a towel in the sand next to Maverick, you watched as your boyfriend Jake ran around on the beach playing football and let your eyes shamelessly roam over his shirtless body, glad you had sunglasses on so no one could tell.  Jake had originally asked you to the beach with his team to play football with them, but when you woke up with your asthma flaring up, he decided it was probably just best for you to sit and watch.

“Why aren’t you out there playing with Hangman?  You don’t normally pass up an opportunity to run around with him,” Maverick asked curiously as he pulled two bottles of water out of the cooler he brought and held one out to you.

“I woke up wheezing this morning.  Jake wanted me to sit out,” you explained as you took the offered water, cracking it open to take a swig.

“Your asthma?  Does it normally bother you?” Maverick asked, turning his head to look over where you were sitting, making a mental note of how raspy your breathing was, despite the salty ocean breeze.

Jake knew that normally the sea air opened your tight lungs, which is why he suggested you still come even if it was just to sit on the beach.  Today however, you had a feeling when you got back to Jake’s place you were going to be curled up to your boyfriend with a breathing treatment going.

“It doesn’t usually, but the heat the last few days has been making me wheeze more than usual,” you shrugged as you took another drink of water before coughing a little.

Reaching into the beach bag you brought, you grabbed your inhaler from where it had fallen to the bottom.  Shaking the device, you let out a wheezy sigh before taking as deep of a breath of medicine as you could manage.  You let your eyes drift shut behind your sunglasses, focusing on the medicine settling in your lungs before you shakily exhale, your next breaths coming a little easier than before.

Because your eyes were closed though, you didn’t see Jake jogging towards you and Maverick, him having noticed you taking a dose of your medicine, making his worry from earlier come back full force.

Jake crouched down in front of you and gently reached a hand out to brush a piece of hair behind your ear, frowning at the sound of your breathing.

“Hey pretty girl, how’s your breathing doing?  You still don’t sound too good,” Jake said softly, no sign of his usual cocky confidence as he ran his thumb over your cheek, causing you to open your eyes even though he couldn’t see them.

“Hi Jake, I’m okay.  My chest is still just a little tight,” you admitted with a wheeze, taking another drink of water when Jake guided it up to your lips again.

“I can hear it darling.  I’m worried about you.  Maybe we should head back to my place and get you into the AC.  Mav, I’m sorry about this.  I know we just got here not too long ago, but I think we should head out, her breathing isn’t getting better,” Jake said as he turned his head to look at the older pilot, hoping he would have some sort of advice.

Frowning, Maverick nodded at Jake’s words and gave you a once over himself, making a mental note of how your cheeks were flushed from your wheezy breathing and not just the sunshine.

“If it’s the AC she needs, do you wanna try taking her inside for a little bit first?  I’m sure Penny wouldn’t mind,” Maverick said as he glanced back to the Hard Deck and where Penny was sitting at one of the tables outside.

“Can we try going inside first?  I don’t want to ruin the beach day,” you wheezed, your shoulders starting to rise and fall a little faster as Jake reached out to move your sunglasses to the top of your hair, wanting to study every part of your face.

Frowning, Jake didn’t like the idea of waiting out the flare up any more than necessary and tilted your chin up so you were looking at his his eyes.  “Are you sure the AC is all you need?  We’ll try your medicine again once your inside.  But if it doesn’t work, I’m taking you home.”  Jake’s tone of voice was commanding, and if you hadn’t already been having trouble breathing, your breath would have caught in your chest from arousal, loving when he took charge.

You nodded at Maverick’s suggestion though and held out your hands for Jake to help you up.  “Let’s try inside first.  Please?”  Your wheezy voice was hopeful as Jake stood from his crouched position, pulling you against his chest before he dropped a kiss to your forehead.

“You get half an hour,” Jake stated as he grabbed your beach bag and looped an arm around your shoulders to steer you up the sand to the bar.

“Hey Penny, sorry to bother you, but can I take this one inside for a bit?  Her shitty lungs need some cool air.”

“Yeah, of course!  Does she need some water?” Penny asked as she moved to her feet to let the two of you inside, noticing that your water from Maverick was almost empty.

“Yes please, if it’s no trouble,” Jake smiled as he led you to the chairs at the bar, rubbing his hand over your upper back as you sat down in a chair.  “Thanks,” he said absentmindedly as Penny set the glass of cool water in front of you, all of his attention back on you as he stood behind you, rubbing the knots out of your tight shoulders.

“Inhaler again,” Jake said bluntly with a nod to the device, watching as you shook it again before taking another puff of the medication.

Normally you would be embarrassed at the amount of attention that was directed at you for your asthma, but there was a small part of you that loved how protective Jake was over you and how in control of the situation he was.

Letting the medicine settle in your lungs again, you exhaled with a few coughs trailing it, the exhaustion from your breathing and the sunshine finally washing over you as you shivered from the AC.

Taking a slightly deeper breath, you winced before turning in the barstool to settle your cheek against Jake’s warm chest, fighting back a few tears now that the two of you were alone and you didn’t need to have your guard up.

“Whoa, what’s with the tears sweetheart?  You’re okay,” Jake whispered in confusion as he hugged you close, confused as to where your sudden emotion was coming from.

“I d-don’t feel good.  My chest is sore, and my inhaler isn’t doing much good.  Can we go back to your place?” you finally wheezed out as a few hot tears fell down your cheeks.

“Sure, we can head out.  I’m sorry you don’t feel well darling.  We’ll get you a breathing treatment and a cold shower, then watch a movie.  Are you okay to walk to my car?  Or do you want me to carry you?” Jake asked, just wanting to hold you close and get you feeling better.

“Carry me please?” you whispered softly, letting him scoop you into his arms as he brought you out to his car and buckled you in, ready to head back and smother you with love.

[estell-allary]

Inferno of love

Relationship:romantic💚

Pairing:Clarisse La Rue x fem!hades!reader

Warnings:swearing,kissing,established relationship,name calling,kinda a make out sesh?!NO SMUT!

A/N-this is after capture the flag wear clarisses spear breaks from Percy and Clarisse is raging and upset so she sends all her siblings out of her cabin And you come in and comfort her and it turns into a little more if you get what I mean😉No but they literally just make out and Clarisse calls you angel as a nickname bc I think it’s cute(this is also inspired by the song lay all your love on me by abba)

The blue team won.Again,you were glaring at a annabeth for snatching the flag from right out from under your noses but nothing could be done now,what’s done is done,your glaring was rudely interrupted by matty,clarisses half-brother,oh yea where was Clarisse?you were about to ask the boy who was huffing and coughing his lungs out from running to you before he started talking,

“H-uhh-hey!um Clarisse is throwing a tantrum ‘huff’ in ou-our cabin we need you to calm her down..”he said still huffing and taking breaks from talking every few seconds.

“Damn is she taking this years loss that bad..kinda thought she would be used to it by now,I mean it is the third year in a row”you said in a puzzled voice before matty spoke again, “what?no-well kinda-but no she’s fuming about her spear.”he said looking at you like it was obvious

“What about her spear?”you spoke up again in a more serious voice furrowing your brows.

Matty looked at you for a few seconds even tho it felt like centuries “wait you don’t know”he said his eyes widening,even tho it wasn’t a question, he stayed still like he was waiting for a answer, “Matty.”you said louder drawing a few looks from people around you “What.Happened.To.Clarisses.Spear.”you repeated.

“T-the new kid”he said and grabbed your arm and started leading you back to cabin 5..“oh gods”

“Oh gods”you repeated at the sound of Clarisse yelling at her siblings to get the fuck out..you weren’t even there yet!at the sound of her voice you subconsciously picked up your speed,you now dragging matty,forcing him to speed up to.

By the time you arrived at the ares kids cabin the last of them walking or more like sprinting out to avoid clarisses wrath most of them looking annoyed and muttering stuff about her not owning the cabin but to scared to say anything to her face,you knew that she’s been trying to get the blond twelve year old to admit his faults in lying about the Minotaur but Jesus getting this mad..I mean you get where shes coming from,the kids kids like a stick but then again..fear can make you strong.Like really strong.

Before you walked into the cabin you told matty to go with his siblings so he doesn’t get yelled at by Clarisse and he obeyed in pure fear from the last time Clarisse yelled at him for spilling juice on you(she also soaked his socks in juice to get back at him dispite your pleas)

You walked into the cabin with one goal in mind help Clarisse even if that means help her in different ways then intended..

You saw her siting on her bed on the second floor directly next to the window.

“Clarisse..you alright my love..”you said startling the girl making her head shot up and grab her now Broken spear.Once she realised it was you she relaxed a bit placing her wreaked spear down.

She huffed out a sigh before responding,not answering your question “hey angel..”she said motioning you towards her and you obliged walking towards her till you were standing between her legs,her spreading them wider so you could be closer to her.

She layed her head down on your chest wrapping her hands around your waist and pulling you against her further.

You kissed her forehead stroking her tight curls that were now tangled up in a hairband that she put it in for capture the flag.Your hands started to untangled her curls 1 by 1 lightly tugging her hair,while Clarisses hands went to your shoulders as she began lighting kissing your neck, her hands playing with the straps of your amour to loosen them.

You slowly removed the hair band out of her hair as to not hurt her as she took off your chest amour,she placed it next to her and moved her hands from your shoulders to your waist,pulling you to her as she leaned back on the bed,making you straddle her thighs and lean down towards her face.

‘Don’t go wasting your emotion,lay all your love on me’

Your hands went from her hair to her shoulders tugging at the straps of her armour but she spoke “uh uh,not today the snotty brats will be coming back soon angel”she said moving your hands back up to her hands“please..”you whined at her trying to convince her that you two could be quick and won’t be caught but she cut you off by kissing you on your lips sloppily.

You moaned as she slipped her tongue into your mouth and gave her roots little tugs making her groan out your name and pulling you Flush against her.

‘Don’t go sharing your devotion,lay all your love on me’

You broke apart for air and before you we’re about to kiss her again someone came running up the stairs and pushing the door open before you and Clarisse could push away from each other,being caught in a very awkward position,you straddling Clarisse with your hands in her hair and her hands placed on the plush of your hips.

And worse it was one of her younger half-siblings,the poor boy looked traumatised,running out the room when Clarisse threw a pillow at him yelling at him to get out and fuck off.

Safe to say you and Clarisse got into a lot of trouble,and got stuck on cleaning the stables for four months.

But it was worth it to be with your girl.

‘Cause everything is new and everything is you’

A/N:I actually had a lot of fun making this because I could imagine Clarisse yelling at her siblings like she owns the cabin and there just renting it😭anyways but my request are open btw so just request what you want and I’ll try to do it💚

[theemporium]

💰 charlos finding out that their sugar baby is sick and pampering her with the best items they can find, constantly sending medicine, etc.

totally not inspired by me having COVID rn

thank you for requesting!🫶🏽

.

You were stupid for thinking the maid would take the puppy dog eyes in full stride and not report back to your boyfriends.

The boys had been away for a double race weekend when you found yourself coming down with something. It hit you far harder than you expected and after a whole week of trying to push through it, you found yourself in bed with snotty tissues and a cough that made your chest feel like it was caving in. 

It was rough. And it sucked to go through alone, but you didn’t want your boys to feel bad. You had managed to avoid long calls or facetime attempts fairly well since it was the last week before they flew back. But what you failed to realise was that the maid who the boys hired to come by and clean the apartment a few days a week would snitch you out to her bosses. 

The messages you received from Charles and Carlos were a mix of concern for your condition and disappointment for you hiding your condition from them. You apologised and told them you couldn’t wait to see them when you were better (which only upset them further when you insisted that they weren’t allowed to see you at risk they would get sick). 

The race on Sunday had been at a fairly decent time, but the flu had knocked you out before a third of the race had even passed. 

You woke up hours later when the sun was no longer in the sky and the snotty tissues on the bed had been replaced with bags and boxes. Multiple bags and boxes that had designer labels on them no matter where you looked. 

Your brows furrowed together in confusion. 

“Ah, mon amour, you’re awake,” a voice sounded to the side of you, and you had little time to react before Charles was placing a kiss on your forehead before cupping your face in his hands. “Hm, your temperature seems to be getting better.”

“Charles?” You mumbled, blinking a few times before everything seemed to click together. “Oh my god—”

You had completely missed the race. Not only that, you had been asleep so long that the boys were able to fly home and apparently turn your bedroom into the next designer outlet.

“You need to leave,” you breathed out before you began to shake your head. “I’m going to get you and Carlos sick—”

Charles frowned as he reached for you. “Baby—”

“—and then you won’t be able to race and…oh my god,” you shuffled away from the boy, looking around the bed in confusion. “What—”

“You must think so little of us if you think we are going to leave you when you’re sick,” a second voice spoke up and your head snapped around to find Carlos standing in the doorway, a tray of food in his hands.

“Carlos—” You started but he quickly interrupted. 

“You’re ours, amor,” Carlos stated simply. “You’re ours to care for and spoil and look after. And that’s exactly what we will do.”

“But your races,” you argued weakly, sniffling a little but you didn’t fight it this time when Charles reached for you and pulled you against his chest.

“We’ll be fine for our races,” Charles reassured you before pressing another quick kiss against your cheek. “Now let us take care of our girl.”

You sighed and both boys grinned triumphantly. 

“The gifts are over the top though,” you told them with a shake of your head. “You need to return them.”

Carlos scoffed. “I think the fever is making you delusional, mi amor. Now eat up, you need the energy to recover.”

“Carlos—” You started but Charles shushed you with another kiss.

“We lost the receipts,” he lied badly before grinning. “And personally I think the little red set would make you feel much better—”

“Maybe when I’m not coughing up a lung,” you snorted. 

“I can be patient,” Charles retorted with a grin.

Carlos snorted. “Sure, amor, sure.”

.

[alvojake]

Sick Days | N.RK

「pairing」 : riki x fem!reader 「word count」 : 1.8k

「synopsis」 : when your project partners ditch their work you are left to pick up their slack, working overtime to get it done before the due date. then to top it off you just so happen to get sick as well but you can't let that stop you so you work anyways. however, when riki catches you he makes sure that you're taken care of and that the project is pushed to the side and of course a few lectures here and there.

「genre」 : fluff and comfort

「warnings」 : some kissing, skinship, cussing, petnames (babe, princess, love...), pretty sure that's it!

「notes」 : this is for my bbg (@rikstar) because I know she hasn't been feeling very well so I hope you get to feeling better my love and that this brings you some comfort and smile to your face <3

It was well after midnight, and you were still perched at your desk, working tirelessly on a project for school. Seeing as all of your partners left you to do everything on your own at the last second so you were busting your ass to try and get it done before the end of the weekend. 

"dammit." you groaned, sniffling because your nose was starting to run once more. Dropping the pen in your hand, you reach over and grab the box of tissues that were sitting behind your laptop. 

As if being left with all of the group work wasn't bad enough, you had gotten sick. You woke up with a high fever, a runny nose, and a throat so sore you could barely speak. 

After blowing your nose, you throw the tissue into the bin next to your desk before grabbing the hand sanitizer. You rub the alcohol gel all over your hands, sniffing again due to the intense smell. 

Then you sat in silence, staring blankly at the laptop screen, trying to will yourself to finish it so you could sleep. You ran your fingers through your hair before slouching forward to continue your work, peeking at your notes every so often.

A scream erupted from your lungs when two hands came down on your shoulder, your body twisting around to defend yourself from your attacker. Coughs racked your lungs as you looked up, seeing none other than your boyfriend standing there, a smirk adorning his features. 

"Holy shit, Riki, you can't just-" You were cut off by a string of coughs, your body hunching away from Riki. 

Worry immediately courses through Riki's mind, hands moving to pat your back softly. His eyes moved around to look at your desk, taking in the papers and pens that were thrown haphazardly around, your laptop turned on with the project presentation still up, and then the tissues that were either in the bin or sitting on your desk in a small pile. It didn't take a genius to figure out that you were sick, but his eyebrows scrunched together as he read some of the notes in your notebook. Hadn't that been your partners' section? 

Once the coughing fit was over, you inhaled deeply, blinking away the years that had started to brim on your waterline. Looking up, you met Riki's gaze, guilt hitting you like a brick when you saw the mixture of annoyance, worry, and disappointment swirling in his eyes. 

"Ri–"

"Why are you doing your partners' part?" His tone came out a lot rougher than he had intended, causing you to flinch slightly. You swallowed thickly, trying to find the words to say because you knew he would lecture you about taking on so much work. However, your lack of response was more than enough of an answer for the tall male. 

Reaching over, he shut your laptop, causing you to panic slightly. His hands reach out to grab it. 

"Hey! I still need to finish that!" you exclaimed, opening the screen, but Riki shut it once more. 

"I came over to check on you because you haven't answered your phone all day," he starts, grabbing the device and holding it out of your reach. I just found you overworking yourself on a group project, but let me guess, they dropped their parts on you at the last second? Not to mention you're sick, y/n." Riki rambled on, walking over to your dresser to set the laptop down.

"Riki, I am fine," you start to say as you stand. However, due to your fatigue and having sat down for so long, your legs felt like jelly, causing you to stumble. Your vision went fuzzy as you fell into Riki's arms, hand covering your eyes because the lights seemed to have grown ten times brighter. 

"Yes, because I would consider this fine." Riki rolled his eyes before leaning down, picking up your frail body. A soft gasp fell from your lips. Your arms wrapped around his neck to keep you steady, even if you knew he wouldn't let you go anywhere. 

"Babe, put me down. I need to finish the project," you whined, your voice coming out hoarse as you tried to get out of his hold. 

"No, you've done enough for today," his voice was stern. He looked down at you, watching as you groaned before sneezing. Even if he was upset with you, he couldn't help but find the small squeak you just let out to be the cutest thing. 

Without you struggling anymore, he made his way to the bathroom, pushing the door open with his foot and flicking the light on. Walking into the cool room, he sat you down on the edge of the tub.

You watched him with tired eyes, exhaustion finally setting in after being pulled away from your work. Seconds later, the sound of running water filled the room.

"Have you eaten anything?" Riki dried his hand off on his sweats after making sure that the temperature was just right, his eyes finding your dazed form. 

Blinking a few times, you move to meet his eyes, and before you can even answer him, the sound of a deep grumble fills the room. Heat crept up your neck, painting your cheeks red but also making you slightly light-headed. Riki couldn't help but chuckle, standing to his feet and stepping in front of you. 

"Get in the bath, and I'll fix you something to eat," he whispered softly, bending down slightly to press his lips to your forehead as you looked up at him. You hummed in contentment, his lips lingering for a few moments before he pulled away. "Or do you need my help getting undressed, too?" he teased, causing you to pout, hit his chest with the back of your hand, and grumble.

Once he was out of the room, you carefully stripped out of your clothes and threw them into the hamper. Turning the tap off, you slipped into the warm water, allowing it to relax your muscles and clear your mind.

~

Not even ten minutes later, Riki was walking back into the room, his eyes falling on your still form. Shaking his head softly, he couldn’t help but smile, knowing that you would have dozed off.

Walking over to the tub, he grabbed the stool that was sitting next to the counter and placed it next to the tub. Sitting down, he carefully grabbed your hair, pulling the elastic out, resulting in your grumbling. 

“You can’t fall asleep in the tub, goof.” He rested his hands on your shoulders after running his fingers through your hair to flatten it a bit.

“‘M so sleepy…” You mumbled, pushing more into his hands, his skin warm against yours.

“Well, if you were resting instead of slaving away all day, you probably wouldn’t be so tired.” He teased, causing your bottom lip to jut out into a pout, doe-eyes glancing back at him.

“I needed to get it done,” You huffed but soon relaxed as Riki started pressing his thumbs into the knots in your shoulders, coaxing them to untangle. A soft sigh falls from your lips as your head lays back, Riki’s fingers still working out all of the tension in your neck and shoulders.

“Why haven’t you said anything to your professor?” He asked, pulling you out of your trance-like state.

Opening your eyes, you looked up at him. " It’s pointless. The project is due on Wednesday, so he’d just tell me to figure it out.”

Riki felt an annoyance bubble in his gut once more. It was completely unfair to you to do all of the work, especially when your partners decided to duck out. Shaking his head, he pulled his hands away from your shoulders, listening to the small whine of protest that fell from your lips.

“Well, how about this?” he stood from his seat, walking over to the towel rack. You call it a night and relax all day tomorrow, and I’ll help you with the project on Sunday.”

You reach forward to unplug the tub drain before glancing at him, “Riki, I need to get-”

“No ifs, ands, or buts.” He walked back to you, helping you stand to your feet before letting you wrap the cotton towel around your body. “Princess, you are sick; you need rest. I promise you that the project will be there later.” He cupped your face, bringing your attention to him and resting his forehead against yours. " Okay?”

Letting out a defeated sigh, you nod, “Okay.”

He smiles sweetly, peppering kisses all over your face before leaning down to capture your lips in a gentle kiss. You whined, pushing against his chest, telling him that he was going to get sick, but he reassured you that it was fine before pressing one last lingering kiss to your lips.

The both of you then made your way back into your bedroom, and Riki pulled out an oversized shirt and a pair of sleep shorts and undergarments. He helped you pull the clothes on your body, worried that you might fall over and hurt yourself if he left you to your own devices.

“Wanna watch a movie?” He asked as you got settled in the bed, the bowl of soup Riki made for you sitting in your lap. Taking a bite, you nod your head at him, eyes flickering from him to the television that is sitting on your dresser.

After you finished your soup, the two of you got comfortable on the bed. Riki pulled you into his chest as he picked a random cartoon to play. He then glances down at you, seeing that you are already dozing off once more.

Smiling softly, he kissed the top of your head and made sure the covers were pulled up enough. The soft sound of the cartoon characters talking lulls you to sleep, as well as the sound of Riki’s heartbeat.

“I wish you would take better care of yourself, love.” He whispered, not taking his eyes off of your face, not expecting your eyes to open, surprising him a bit.

“I’m sorry,” Your voice trailed on as you averted your eyes, guilt eating at your mind once more. However, Riki was quick to clock it, taking your chin in his hand and pulling your gaze back to him.

“You work so hard, but you have to remember to take time for yourself, too.” He spoke softly, his thumb caressing your warm cheek. “Plus, it’s okay to lean on others in times of need. I want you to know that you can lean on me.” He added, causing you to bite your lip and nod.

“I will, I’m sorry.” You mumbled, a small pout forming on your lips, causing him to laugh lightly.

“It’s okay, but now go to sleep.” He placed his palm over your face, causing you to gasp and smack his hand away with a playful glare, which only made him laugh, the sound like music to your ears.

Shaking your head, you snuggle into his body, lying your head on his chest before drifting off to sleep. You're already feeling a bit better than you had an hour before.

@alvojake | Do not steal, plagiarise, translate, or repost any of my work

𝖉𝖎𝖘𝖈𝖑𝖆𝖎𝖒𝖊𝖗 : ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ɴᴏ ᴡᴀʏ ᴀ ᴛʀᴜᴇ ʀᴇᴘʀᴇꜱᴇɴᴛᴀᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏꜰ ᴀɴʏ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴍᴇᴍʙᴇʀꜱ. ᴛʜɪꜱ ɪꜱ ᴘᴜʀᴇʟʏ ꜰɪᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ ꜰᴏʀ ᴛʜᴇ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏᴍᴇɴᴛ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ᴀɴᴅ ɴᴏᴛ ᴛᴏ ʙᴇ ᴛᴀᴋᴇɴ ꜱᴇʀɪᴏᴜꜱʟʏ.

[casualheizouenjoyers]

- secrets i have held in my heart

featuring: jing yuan, bailu, yanqing, reader

warnings: a bit angsty ig, hanahaki au, blood, sickness, throwing up, coughing and just general sick stuff

Orchids grow where others cannot.

This phrase reigns especially true when orchids begin to grow in your body. Scratching your throat and clogging up your lungs. 

You try to laugh it off as a small cough, a small sickness, as if the whole thing didn’t fill you with dread when you thought about the invasive plant infesting your every breath. 

It isn’t until finally you violently cough over your sink that a bloodied white orchid petal came fluttering out.

Were… you some form of mara struck? You wondered in confusion at the collection of petals that grew with each hack of your lungs. 

The high elder —Bailu— immediately takes up your case. Which is potentially concerning as you’ve gone to about possibly any doctor that will see you for some kind of explanation to your floral fever and none of them have had anything good to say. 

In fact, they have nothing to say about your illness. No one knew what was causing the orchids to bloom, making a home of your decaying body; a pretty parasite taking you ahold. 

The little Vidyadhara girl frowned upon seeing the collection of whole flowers and crumbled petals, all coated with a splattered layer of dried blood. 

Bailu’s eyes squinted as she observed the floral. 

Perhaps, it was some kind of achievement that you had every doctor and healer on the luofu stumped at your conditions? 

It isn’t until you’re coughing out another flower, this time red covering it was still vibrant and liquid, that the healer decided you were some form of mara struck and needed to be monitored closely. Even as she wrote out her prescription and made you promise to come back the next week, you could tell she wasn’t too sure about what she was saying.

That did absolutely nothing to calm your nerves. 

You go home after collecting your prescription and puke out leaves and stems along with the flowers. 

Despite your sickness, work is work, you decided, and working as a tutor was fulfilling for you. You hope —prayed— that the sight of your favorite student, Yanqing, would bring you some form of joy. The lesson went smoothly, though it was clear your student’s mind was up in the clouds, but you didn’t comment about it as yours was rooted deep elsewhere. 

With the closing of the textbook, Yanqing’s eyes light up. 

“Can we swordfight now?” The teenaged boy asked.

You almost said no.

You had realized early on that Yanqing would do his work and pay attention better if you found a way to relate it to swordsmanship, or if you promised that the two of you would spar a little after a lesson. 

There was a growing weakness in your body. It seemed that describing the flowers as a parasite wasn’t inaccurate, as every day went on you felt them drain the energy out of you. 

Yanqing waited for your response.

You nodded, standing up and picking up your sword from where it rested on a wall. Once, you had used it as a cloud knight, now it only ever saw use when teaching the blonde boy. 

Yanqing excitedly ran to the other side of the room, drawing his sword and getting into position. He paused, looking over at you.

When did your eyes become so sunken in? Your hand shook as you held your sword up and it became increasingly clear to Yanqing that you were in no position to swordfight. 

Your student called out your name, a hint of concern in his voice. 

“I— Give me a moment—” You called out, placing a hand on your head as a sudden headache came, making your vision blur and your legs lose balance as you head tumbling for the floor.

Yanqing tossed his sword far away as he slid to catch you. 

Bailu is halfway through her yearly appointment with the general when you come in with Yanqing by your side.

You mumbled apologies for the interruption and swore on your life you were fine. 

You had honestly not realized how bad things had gotten in the few days from the last time you had seen the healer.

Your heart fluttered at the sight of Jing Yuan.

The orchid also fluttered out of your mouth in a set of coughs that leave you out of breath on the ground, Yanqing down at your side again. 

There are multiple voices speaking but your mind can focus on none of them. 

Jing Yuan helped you up and you feel your heart clench up as a choke comes to your throat.

More orchids. 

He whispered to you in a soft voice, trying to help you through this coughing fit as Yanqing explained the situation that had happened just a few minutes before. 

Bailu watched this, shock painted on the girls face as she realized two truths.

You were indeed mara struck, just with a rare mutation that had gone out thousands of years ago. 

You were also in love with the general

and it was going to be the death of you.

[carpetbug]

welcome to the beginning of my ML Feline Blue AU!

in which Marinette is forced to become guardian before ever wielding a miraculous. Chaos ensues when she uses the black cat ring to become feline blue and through a silly little turn of events, Adrien gets his hands on the ladybug earrings and becomes beetle rouge

BIIIIIG thank you to my lovelies @isabugs and @thimbleb3rries for being so kind and encouraging, for their WONDERFUL ART OH MY GOD, and for beta-ing this!

The beginning: Becoming Guardian

1 • 2 • 3

“You’re not going to beat me like that, old man” The looming figure taunted.

Hunched in a ball before him, a much smaller elderly man struggled for breath. Blood trailed from his mouth, combining with his saliva to messily drip from his lips as he fought for air. Just by the effort he had to put into continuing breathing, he could tell this was not a fight he could win. Still, his fists clenched in defiance as he pushed himself from the floor and steadied himself upright on his feet. His spine screamed in protest and searing pain at the task, but he managed to remain standing.

“I know I can not beat you, old man” He coughed, hands trembling slightly. “But I must continue to fight”

The taller man scoffed before taking a step forward “I’ll make sure it's the last thing you ever do, you pathetic excuse of a guardian” He spat, tightening his grip on his cane as his rage boiled beneath his skin.

“I’d expect nothing less from a villain like you, Hawkmoth”

“No need to act like you’re so much better than me. After all, we've all made mistakes, haven’t we Master fu” Hawkmoth sneered.

“Leave my past out of this. I’ve worked to fix what I have broken, you only aim to destroy” Master fu panted, feeling his shoulders to check if his bag was still on his back, and letting out a small sigh of relief when he felt the thick material. Next his hands slowly traveled to support and feel the bottom and sides of the bag, searching for an object. He took another relieved breath when he felt the item's weight, and then he prepared himself for the worst. Bunching his muscles, he sprang into action and bolted away from Hawkmoth.

He focused only on moving forward, getting as far from this wretched evil as he could before time ran out. When he finally collapsed, legs giving out from under him in pure exhaustion, he found himself at the Pont de Arts, above the seine. Hawkmoth was nowhere to be seen, but master fu knew that was only a false sense of security. The villain would find him soon enough. He needed to find someone. Anyone.

“-ir? Are you okay?”

A voice. Master fu looked up, vision shaking just slightly. In Front of him stood a teenage girl, dark hair pulled back into pigtails and eyebrows pushed together with worry.

“Sir? Can you hear me?” She asked with a panicked look in her eyes. “How can I help?” She stepped closer and offered him a hand.

Master fu gathered his strength to pull his bag from his back and carefully draw open the zipper before reaching in to pull out the contents. The girl watched intensely, eyes following his pained movements. He pulled a large dark wooden box from the bag and held it close to his chest, then brought his eyes upwards to meet her face. “I’m sorry, young hero” He said sadly, then joined his hand to hers before she could respond.

An intense feeling washed over him, and he closed his eyes to take a deep breath. This girl was strong. He hoped she will forgive him for the burden he will make her bear.

She flashed an anxious smile “That’s okay, and I promise I’m no hero. Just a normal g-” He cut her off with a sharp tug, then slammed the box into her chest. She gasped as he knocked the air from her lungs, clearly not expecting such a feat of strength from the battered man. As she fought to breathe, Master fu gathered the last few remnants of his strength and lifted the girl from the ground. “I, Wang Fu, hereby relinquish the Miracle Box-”

“Stop! What are you doing!?”

“-and name Marinette Dupain-Cheng the guardian” His body lit up, skin glowing as the box between them lifted upward and burned like a star in the air.

“How do you know my na-?!” Before she could finish what she said, the box dropped back into her hold and the elderly man -still glowing like some sort of deity- held her over the railing and dropped her into the rushing water below. She hit the surface with a loud splash, getting thrown under but quickly resurfacing a few feet away, miracle box still in her arms.

The last thing she saw before being pulled away by the fast moving current was the man falling backwards to the ground in exhaustion as the light emitting from his skin dimmed.

Master fu slowly blinked his eyes open, carefully taking in his surroundings with an expression of pure shock and confusion on his face. He seemed so frail, all of a sudden. Like he had lost all his fight.

“What did you do?!” a booming voice hissed behind him. He started to turn his head to look, but something beat him to it. All of a sudden, a hand tightened around his throat and picked him off the ground, nails digging into the thin skin of his neck.

“What- what’s happening?” Master fus strangled voice hardly escaped his lips. He tried to thrash his legs, do anything to get free, but a fatigue he couldn’t explain had overcome his muscles. Weakly prying at his attackers hands, panic began to set in. There wouldn’t be any escape. “Who are you?” he managed out in a pained mumble.

“I am the next guardian of the miraculous” the seething voice responded as nails began to break through his skin. “I am the consequences of your greatest mistake” the words rang through his head as his vision went black, and sickeningly warm blood poured from his throat.

Marinette struggled to hold her head above the surface and keep the container in her grasp as the river pulled her this way and that. Her mind raced and her lungs screamed, everything inside her begging to let go of that weird old man’s weird old box and save herself instead. Still, her grip remained glued to the sodden wood, as if she would rather drown than set the box free to face the waters’ wrath. Nothing was making any sense. And despite the deafening chorus of the racing water that surrounded her, the only thing ringing in her ears was the man’s words.

He had called her a hero. He had entrusted her with something clearly important to him. He had thrown her into the seine. He had been badly wounded. He had been a complete and utter stranger. What did everything mean? Suddenly, her feet felt solid ground beneath her, and she hurriedly moved to follow it. She pushed forward, focusing on reaching the bank that lay on the other side. Eventually Marinette was able to pull herself and the box from the water onto an empty platform beneath a bridge.

As soon as she was safely out of the water, Marinette threw herself backwards in exhaustion. She laid against the cool pavement underneath her and passed through all the events that had just occurred. What the fuck was this ‘miracle’ box? And why was she the ‘guardian’? Ignoring the new aches in her body, she sat upward and brought the box closer to her.

There she sat for a few moments, toying with the lid and gently tracing the intricate pattern displayed. Taking a deep breath, she slowly opened it.

“HELLO YOUNG MASTER” A loud chorus of voices rang out as a beam of light emitted from the open container and what looked like small differently colored masses of stars flew all around her. Marinette fell back onto her elbows, overwhelmed at the sudden sensory overload. Her vision was a blur of nauseating colors accompanied by what she could only imagine to be auditory hallucinations.

Before she had a chance to speak, to catch her breath or try and scream for help, the almost magical colorful masses slowed until they were still, then began to morph into a solid form. Marinette watched, intrigued and terrified, as these small creatures took shape in front of her. They each seemed to be a different animal, though they all shared an alien-like anatomy. Some had tails, others long whiskers and a few antennas. Two of them caught her eye, a sleek black cat and what she thought to be a ladybug (though it looked much more like some sort of bug-mouse combo).

As if the creatures could read her mind -which they could, for all she knew-, they began to speak in sync. “WE ARE THE KWAMI, MAGICAL BEINGS THAT CAN BESTOW POWERS UPON OUR WIELDERS.” They said, in an almost sing-songy voice.

“AND YOU, MARINETTE, ARE OUR NEW GUARDIAN.”

[justagalwhowrites]

Yearling - Ch. 40: Home

Jackson holds a celebration. The final chapter of Yearling found on Tumblr in its entirety here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Smut :) No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only 

Length: 7.7k

A/N: We are through the spoiler-y portion now and you're all OK to read from here if you just want to see how the fic starts to come to a close. There is no more overlap with TLOU 2.

AO3 | Chapter One | Previous Chapter

December, 2002 

“Is that pot?” 

Your oldest brother, Brendan, damn near jumped out of his skin, looking around frantically for a moment before his eyes settled on you and he calmed, his hand going to his chest. 

“Shit, bug,” he said. “Yell it, why don’t you.” 

“If I yell it, Mom’ll take it away,” you said, joining him at the fence on the edge of your father’s property, climbing up and perching next to him in the moonlight. “But that means I need motivation to keep my big mouth shut so you’d better fuckin’ share.” 

He scoffed but passed you the joint, anyway. You took it and breathed deep, pulling the smoke into your lungs and holding it there until the urge to cough was too strong and you gave into it, handing the joint back to your brother, clouding the winter air with a pot-scented haze. 

“Jesus, getting high with my baby sister,” he chuckled. “Never thought I’d see the day.” 

“It’s because you’re getting old,” you teased lightly. He smiled and shook his head, taking a hit before passing it back to you. You took a hit, too, a smaller one this time, trying to make smoke rings as you breathed it out. “So. How’ve you been?” 

“Good,” he nodded slowly, taking the joint back. “Thinkin’ about starting up my own ranch…” 

“No shit?” You asked, brows raised. He nodded. “Good for you. Think you’d be good at it. I do gotta ask though… This have anything to do with Amanda?” 

You teased out the last word and he laughed. 

“Was waitin’ for that,” he said. “Talked to Mom have you?” 

“Here and there,” you said. “You really ask for Gran’s ring?” 

“Jesus…” 

“C’mon,” you elbowed him. “You’re thinkin’ of marrying her?” 

“More than thinkin’,” he smiled a little. “If I’m marrying anyone, it’s her.” 

He took another hit and passed the joint back to you and you nodded, mulling that over in your head. Your brother, settled down enough to get married and start a ranch of his own. It seemed like a completely foreign concept but it was one you liked. 

“You’d like her,” he said after a few minutes. “Amanda, I mean. She might come to New Year’s, think you two would get on like a house on fire. She’s studying to be a vet, specializing in large animals. Only person I know who likes horses as much as you.” 

“Damn,” you said, taking a hit yourself. “She does sound great. Too good for you, that’s for damn sure…” 

He snorted. 

“Don’t I know it.” 

You passed him the joint again. 

“Can I ask you something?” You said after sitting in silence for a minute. 

“Shoot.” 

“How do you know?” You asked. 

He frowned. 

“Know what?” 

“Know that…” you sighed. “I don’t know, know that she’s the one? That you want to marry her and all that shit?” 

He smiled a little, nodding knowingly as he did. 

“Well,” he said. “Sounds dumb, but… when you know, you know.” 

“Jesus,” you rolled your eyes and he laughed. 

“I’m serious,” he said. “You’ll know. But… Well, she’s my favorite damn person. I don’t want to do anything without her if I can help it. I love everything about her, even the shit that drives me nuts. Mostly, though, I just want to live life with her, you know? Want to go grocery shopping and do dishes and fuckin’ mow the lawn… all that shit. It all sounds great because it’d be with her. That’s how you know.” 

You nodded slowly, trying to imagine feeling that way about anybody. It didn’t really seem possible.

“Don’t sweat it too much, bug,” he said, clapping you on the shoulder. “You got plenty of time before you need to worry about that shit. No need to rush into it. Just wait until the time is right and you’ve found the right person and then you’re good. It’ll all work out in the end.” 

He was right, you thought as you nodded again. You had all the time in the world but, eventually, you’d find someone you’d want to share it with. Even if that sounded insane now, you thought you would. You looked up at the cold, December sky, the universe stretched out before you and you took a deep satisfying breath. 

“Yeah,” you said. “I think it will.” 

***

July 20, 2029 

“Joel, where the hell is your wife?” 

Tommy and Joel both looked at each other before looking to Maria, confused. 

“Don’t think it was my turn to watch ‘er,” Joel said, setting his whiskey down. “Actually, think it was the exact opposite of my turn to watch her what with tradition and all…” 

“Well maybe it should have been because I can’t find her,” Maria said, clearly flustered. “I’ve checked your place, her old place, the room she was supposed to be getting ready in…” 

Joel smiled a little to himself, shaking his head and getting up from the table. There was one obvious place Maria hadn’t checked. 

“Maybe she’s gettin’ cold feet,” Tommy teased, smirking. “Lord knows she’s too smart for you, anyhow. Maybe she figured it out…” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Joel said, adjusting the collar on his shirt. He was in too good a mood to even give his brother shit back. “Don’t think it works that way if you’ve already been married a year and a half. Besides, I think I know where to find her…” 

“Just tell me,” Maria groaned, half-heartedly trying to stop him. “I’ll go. It’s bad luck for you to do it.” 

“Think we already had more than our share of that,” he said, giving her a wink. “Think we’ll be OK.” 

He left his brother’s kitchen and started toward the stables, walking in the opposite direction of most of the town, everyone making their way toward the gathering place in the middle. They gave him warm smiles and nods and congratulations as he passed and he smiled back, a little bubble of warmth in his chest that swelled as he made his way to you. Because while Maria might not know where you were, he sure did. 

He heard you before he saw you. 

“You’re doing good,” you said. “Try not to let your fingers get ahead of where your mind is though, that’s where you’re stutterin’ a bit…” 

“Easy for you to say,” Joel almost heard Savvy’s eyes roll as she teased you. “You don’t have as many fingers to keep track of.” 

You barked a laugh at that as Joel came into the stable. You were perched on the wall of Perseus’ stall, Savvy and Ellie sitting on either side of you, the guitar he’d made for Savvy in her arms. She noticed him before you did, giving him a little smile. 

“Here,” she said, passing the guitar to you. “You should play something Dad likes since you’re getting married today and all.”

“Look at you, bein’ all sentimental,” you teased lightly back. But you took the guitar and drummed on it for a moment before settling on a song. “Alright, this is the first thing he ever played me. His version is better but this song always makes me think of him now.” 

Joel just leaned against the door, watching and listening as you played I’m On Fire, that warm glow in his chest somehow growing as you did, wondering if you could possibly be any more perfect. You were wrong about one thing, though. Your version was better.

It had taken you a while to pick up the guitar again. You’d been back more than two months when he came home from a short patrol to find you on the couch, the guitar he made you in your arms and a determined - if frustrated - look on your face. You glanced up at him when he came in before looking back at the instrument. 

“I’m tryin’ real hard not to throw this,” you said, arranging your intact hand on the neck of the guitar. “But it’s pissing me off.” 

“Think I’d rather you throw the pillow,” Joel said wryly, coming to sit beside you. You rolled your eyes. “Want to show me?” 

“Not really,” you said but you did anyway, starting to play the way you had for years and then seeming to forget that you had two fewer fingers, notes missing and fumbled and you shouted in frustration, almost throwing the guitar before clenching your jaw and moving to set it on the coffee table. Joel took it from you before you could, setting it on the other side of the couch before pulling you against him and kissing the top of your head. 

“You were sounding good there, baby,” he said, stroking your arm. You scoffed. “Mean it, you were.” 

“Yeah, I was playin’ a mess of bullshit there at the end,” you said. “Real good.” 

“It’s gonna take time, sweetheart,” he said gently. “You spent a long time playing the way you used to. Takes a while to adjust. You’ll get there…” 

“Because there are so many famous eight-fingered guitarists,” you muttered, your voice thick. 

“Sure, but you’re better than every guitarist I’ve ever heard of,” he said, tugging you closer. “You will get there, baby. If anyone can it’s you.” 

You sighed but snuggled into him and he hoped that you believed him. He wasn’t just saying it. Something inside him knew that you’d find a way to make music again the way you used to. 

He was right. It took a few weeks - a few weeks of almost perpetual frustration - but you got there. He watched it happen, the moment it seemed to click into place almost startling in its clarity. You were playing in the kitchen while he cooked, not really working on anything in particular, just seeing what sounds you could pull from your instrument and how you could make them work together in that way you had when, all of a sudden, you played a few notes in quick succession. Joel frowned to himself and glanced over his shoulder, hoping you weren’t paying attention to him. You weren’t. You were intently focused on the guitar, your hands frozen on it for a moment before you did it again, adding more chords this time. The next thing he knew, you were playing the riff from Layla, laughing as you did. 

“Joel!” You looked over to him after playing it a few times and he’d stopped pretending he wasn’t watching you, just leaning against the counter so you had the space to do what you needed to do. “Did you hear that?” 

“Yeah baby,” he smiled. “Sure did.” 

You made a giddy little noise and carefully arranged the guitar in your arms again before starting over. He had to practically pry the instrument away from you when dinner was done but you were beaming when he did, even though the place where you’d lost fingers was bleeding from the guitar strings. 

Joel made you something after that, a simple piece of leather that covered that sensitive place and looped down around your wrist. It seemed to work wonders for you, making it easier to play guitar and work with the horses and he let himself feel good about it. He’d done something for you that made your life here better. He could still take care of you, still give you what you needed. They hadn’t taken that, too. 

It still took a while for things to get back to normal. Or close to normal, anyway. After everything that had happened over the last two years, Joel didn’t think there was any real way to go back. You still woke up afraid some nights, his leg still bothered him more often than not. But there were good changes, too. Savvy had moved into the bedroom you’d set up for her, happy to have her mother to come home to again. Ellie came around all the time, often with her girlfriend in tow - something that had taken Joel by surprise but had settled into quickly. You’d even become more involved in Jackson, joining the council in the most recent election after Maria encouraged you to run. When the results had come in you sat there, wide eyed, for a moment before you got up and smiled and thanked people for voting for you. It was the shortest acceptance speech Jackson ever had. 

While he wouldn’t want to go back and relive the worst of those times, he was starting to think the heartache was there for a reason. It was to get you both here, to this place, building your family and community together. 

You finished the song and Ellie and Savvy clapped and you scoffed. 

“Sounded real good there, baby,” Joel said from his place by the door. You didn’t jump at the sound of his voice, instead just looking over your shoulder back to him. “Tryin’ to show me up?” 

“Nah,” you smiled, handing the guitar to Ellie and jumping down from your perch. “Never could with I’m On Fire. Other shit, though…” 

He laughed and shook his head a little as you walked over to him, a blissful smile on your face, and he gave himself a chance to really appreciate you in that moment. 

Joel always thought you were beautiful. You were beautiful when he’d first seen you in the forest years ago now, you were beautiful when you fell asleep against him when watching movies, you were beautiful when you came home covered in sweat and dirt and the smell of horse. But damn, were you ever beautiful here, like this. You were in a white eyelet lace dress that went down to your ankles, dropping low enough at the neck that the swell of your breasts were going to be a constant fucking temptation. Savvy had made you a crown of flowers that sat on your head and Joel’s old wedding band hung on a chain around your neck and your cowboy boots had been polished to shining and damn did he want to sweep you off your feet and carry you back home to hide you away from everyone else looking that good. 

“Anyone ever tell you you’re the most beautiful woman on the damn planet?” He asked as you draped your arms around his neck and his hands found your waist. 

“You,” you smiled, your eyes crinkling at the edges with it. “From time to time.” 

“Should say it more then,” he smiled back. “Been slacking.” 

“You’re not supposed to see her, you know,” Ellie said, trying to sound stern but smiling a little instead. “Maria told me.” 

“Well someone decided to sneak away without tellin’ anyone where she was headed,” Joel teased lightly. 

You just smiled broader. 

“The important people knew where to find me,” you said. 

Joel looked between you and the daughters you shared. 

“Yeah,” he said. “Suppose we did.”

He took your hand and the four of you headed for the middle of town, Joel kissing you goodbye in a spot that was a little tucked away so not everyone would catch a glimpse of you. 

“You’re too damn pretty,” he smiled. “Don’t want to spoil it for everyone. See you up there?” 

You smiled back. 

“Try and stop me.” 

Joel wasn’t sure he’d ever felt quite so happy as when he watched you walk down the aisle toward him. The two of you said more traditional vows this time, Savvy and Maria by your side, Ellie and Tommy by his. There was something about making promises to you publicly, where everyone the two of you knew could see, that just felt right. You exchanged new rings this time, ones made of the antler of a moose Joel had felled a few months earlier, him slipping yours on your middle finger this time. When he kissed you, the rest of the town fell away and it was just you and him, the way it felt like it should be.

The whole town celebrated after, tables put out on the grass and lights hanging from the trees. Someone had rigged up a sound system and the children of Jackson chased each other, weaving in and out of tables shrieking and giggling as they went. You and Joel were sat at a head table with the girls, Tommy, Maria and William and Joel kept his hand on your knee all through dinner. 

To kick off the dancing, Joel tugged you onto the floor, your chin tucked into your chest, and swayed slowly to Hallelujah, so like you had the first time he danced with you, before everything had fallen into place this way. You smiled and pressed close to him, moving alongside him in front of everyone the two of you knew in the world and Joel was happy. 

Back at your table, he was just starting to think of a way to steal you back to the house when Ellie gave you a look, jerking her head off to the side. You gave his shoulder a squeeze and smiled, a little nervously. 

“See you in a second,” you said, before following Ellie, who was whispering conspiratorially with you. 

“What in the hell…” Joel frowned, watching you. 

“Just have to wait and see, Dad,” Savvy said, looking far too pleased with herself. 

He didn’t have to wait long. You and Ellie returned with your guitar and a boom box, Tommy setting up a chair for you in the middle of everything so everyone could see you before cutting the music. 

“Hey, everyone!” Tommy yelled, his hands cupped around his mouth like a megaphone. “Pay attention to my baby sister!” 

The whole of Jackson obeyed and Joel could tell that you were fighting the urge to just go and be next to him, far from the public eye. Instead, you stood next to Tommy, the guitar Joel made you dangling from your hand, Ellie standing nearby next to the boom box. 

“Thanks, everyone, for comin’ tonight,” you said, your accent thick like it was when you got nervous. Joel smiled a little, the sound of home coming from your lips. “Means a lot to us that you’re here and sharing this with us. It means a lot to me, especially. I know it took me some time to settle in here because I ain’t had somewhere to call home with anyone other than my daughter for a real long time. But here feels like home, and the way everyone here has welcomed us… it means everything to me. 

“Now, a lot of y’all may not know it but…” you took a deep breath and Joel could see you try to swallow your nerves. “I’m something of a musician. I don’t much like playing for anyone besides family but since I feel like y’all are family now, well… seemed only appropriate I play for everyone here tonight.” 

You sat down and rested the guitar on your lap. 

“Music’s always been the way I get my feelings out,” you said, now focused on Joel. His heart swelled. “I’ve never been great with words and I love you just doesn’t feel like enough when it comes to you, Joel. This ain’t much but… feels closer at least.” 

You gave Ellie a nod and she pressed play on the boom box and Joel had to fight to not tear up as you played, the song growing and swelling as it went on, the boom box adding in piano and violin. The music was beautiful and intimate and made Joel think of the quiet mornings he spent with you in his arms, trailing his fingers over your the curve of you, your breath warm on his skin, gently kissing his way over you before the world woke up and it was just you and him and the love you made together. He loved those mornings with you, he wanted countless more of them and he could practically see them now, laid out in front of him like the world at his feet.  

When the song ended, the whole of Jackson was silent, the only sound the rustle of the breeze on the trees. You tugged your lower lip between your teeth and, for half a second, looked like you wanted the ground to swallow you up. But then, all at once, everyone broke into applause, thunderous and adoring and you gave Joel a bashful look. Ellie took the boom box and your guitar to stash them away again as you made your way back to him, what seemed like everyone in town on their feet for you as you went. 

“Hope that wasn’t too embarrassing,” you said as Joel pulled you in close. 

“Baby, that was incredible,” he said, giving you a long, deep kiss. “I didn’t even know you’d been workin’ on the piano and the violin again!” 

“I know,” you smiled a little, pressing close and tight to him. “You’re a hard man to surprise. But once I figured out the guitar, I wanted to get those back, too. Tommy even helped me tune the piano at my old place.” 

Joel looked to his brother who gave him a small salute before he turned back to you. 

“You’re amazing,” he said, resisting the urge to take off with you then and there. You just rolled your eyes before he kissed you again and he tried to be content with just having his arm around you as everyone in town made their way up to congratulate the two of you. 

After what felt like a small eternity - and a few more dances with you - Tommy finally leaned over to whisper in Joel’s ear. 

“I’ll hold down the fort and make sure the girls are all good,” he said. “Get outta here before you lose your damn mind.” 

“Thanks, man,” Joel clapped him on the shoulder and Tommy just gave him a lopsided smile, one that Joel would would call paternal if it came from anyone else. He supposed it did from Tommy, too, now. It was still an odd thought, his brother finding his way to a wife and a place in the world before Joel had, that Joel was the one playing catch up and, in some ways, relying on his brother for help and guidance. But with you, it felt like he’d more than caught up. He’d come out ahead. 

“Hey,” Joel gave you a little squeeze and whispered in your ear. “What do you say we get outta here, Mrs. Miller?” 

“Really?” Your face lit up and Joel smiled and nodded. “Oh thank fuck, I don’t think I can talk to anyone who isn’t you or the girls again for a week…” 

He laughed a little, pressing a kiss to your shoulder. 

“C’mon,” he said. “Let’s sneak out…” 

Joel took your elbow as you got up, the dance floor full as Tommy got to his feet, cupping his hands around his mouth like a megaphone again. 

“Ladies and gentleman!” He yelled. “For the last time tonight, Mr. and Mrs. Miller!”

Joel gave him a look and Tommy gave him a wink as everyone turned and clapped. You and Joel waved goodbye before he put his arm around your waist and pulled you tight against his side, leading you home. 

*** 

“Mrs. Miller,” Joel trailed his nose over your cheek, his words quiet in your ear. 

“Hm,” you grunted in response, eyes still closed. 

“C’mon,” he said softly, his hand smoothing over your stomach that was still covered by your wedding dress. “Gotta get up, we got places to be.” 

You opened a skeptical eye at that. The ceiling of your bedroom was painted orange by the sunrise and Joel was there, smiling down at you, his curls still a little unruly from where your fingers had wound in them the night before. 

“Where do we have to be?” You asked. “Pretty sure we get the day after our wedding off.”

“We do,” he said, his hand gliding over you, between your breasts in the low cut of your gown, over your chest to cup your cheek. “But still want to get an early start. Made you coffee, let’s go.” 

“Early start for what?” You asked, sitting up now. 

“Don’t worry about it,” he smiled. “You’ll like it, promise. Think you can ride a horse in that pretty dress of yours?” 

You gave him an incredulous look. 

He laughed. 

“Fair enough. Then let’s get goin’.” 

“Do I need to pack a bag or anything?” You asked, trying not to groan as you got out of bed. 

“Already handled,” he said. “All I need is my beautiful wife to come along for the ride.” 

You smiled a little. 

“Think I can manage that.” 

You had coffee and slices of leftover wedding cake with Joel before walking with him, hand in hand, to the stables, the sound of Jackson just coming to life around you as you went. 

It felt a little silly to still be in your wedding dress but, you had to admit, it was a damn nice dress.

Staying in it the night before had been Joel’s idea. His lips had been working their way over your throat to your ear before he whispered to you there. 

“That dress of yours comfortable?” He asked, a little breathless. 

“Yeah,” you panted, pulling back just enough to frown at him. “Why?” 

“Because,” he said, taking a moment to nip at your lower lip. “Did things backwards our first wedding night, already had you naked when we said our vows. Kinda want to have you in the white dress, make a real pretty mess of you in it.” 

You smiled, reaching up and trailing your fingers through his hair. 

“Whatever you want, Mr. Miller.” 

He made you come four times in that dress the night before and you passed out in his arms before you could will yourself to move enough to take it off, too tired from the day of celebrations to bother changing once he was done with you. 

It had been Joel’s idea to have a wedding ceremony. He’d brought it up a few months before, once you’d fallen back into life in town again, things as normal as they could be now. You still sometimes felt the ache of fingers that were no longer yours, you still sometimes woke up afraid that your daughters were gone, but you’d healed, too. Your skin was no longer broken and raw, you could play the music you loved again, you could go down the hall and look in on Savvy when you woke up afraid she was gone. 

“We’re already married, Joel,” you laughed at him, your feet on his lap as you played guitar one night when Savvy was out with Kyle. Orion snuggled closer to your knee. “You forget that just because we don’t wear the rings anymore?” 

“Never forget that,” he smiled a crooked smile at you as he massaged the arch of your foot. “One of the best damn nights of my life. But… I think now’s a good time to celebrate that with our family. Girls weren’t there for it, neither was Tommy. Think it’d be nice to do it again with them.” 

You nodded slowly, mulling it over. It wasn’t a bad thought. You did want to share that with Savvy and Ellie, especially now that Savvy would actually be happy about it. And you knew that Joel had missed Tommy and Maria’s wedding, something he regretted now that he had a proper life here in Jackson. You understood why he’d want his brother there. You’d want your brothers there, too, if they were still alive. 

“Sure,” you said eventually. “Let’s do it. Have witnesses when you make promises to me this time around, really hold you to that shit…” 

He laughed at that. 

“Damn right, baby,” he said. “You can hold me to whatever you want.” 

Plans quickly grew, though, from just your family to family and friends to the whole of Jackson. Warren manipulated patrol schedules so there would be one afternoon that everyone was in town, damn near every chair and table that could be moved set up for the reception. It had become more than a celebration of you and Joel, changing into something celebrating the peace the city had known in the year since Mitchum’s downfall. 

The raider attacks became almost non-existent, patrols hunting down the smaller side groups and wiping them out quickly once Mitchum’s control fell away. After that, even the threat from infected lessened. With fewer people in the forests in the miles around Jackson, there was less reason for them to be there. Patrols had become quiet and mostly peaceful, the town no longer afraid of what they might lose every time the gates to the city opened. 

You were happy for the excuse for the focus to not be entirely on you all night, anyway. You’d never been comfortable being the center of attention and, while you liked having a chance to actually show how much your husband meant to you after years together, having that many eyes on you got old fast. Going home just you and Joel had been a relief. 

“Hey there love birds,” Olivia said when you got to the stable, two sets of reins in her hands. “Ready to get underway?” 

“Think so,” Joel said, taking the reins from her, Renaissance and Ares both packed like they were leaving for a long patrol. “Thanks for doin’ this.” 

“Hey, anything to get her to take a break,” she gave you a wink. “Lord knows she deserves it. Have fun you two.” 

“Joel,” you laughed, almost nervously, following alongside him as he led the horses to the gate. “Where are we going? What’s going on?” 

“You’ll see,” he smiled a little as you reached the gates, handing you Renaissance’s reins. “Just have to keep up.” 

You raised your brows at him and he laughed. 

“Alright, just have to let me lead for a change, how about that?” 

“That, I can do,” you smiled. 

It was an easy ride, you following where Joel led, smiling and laughing and breathing in the fresh, clean scent of the forest as you did. For a while, you so rarely left Jackson after Mitchum. No matter what Joel and Tommy and Maria and Julie said, it didn’t feel safe. The worst things that had ever happened to you had happened outside those walls, it just wasn’t worth the risk to leave. If you were inside, in the house you shared with Joel and Savvy or at the stables or the Tipsy Bison, everything would be OK. 

But you missed the outside, too. You missed how crisp the air was when you were outside, the sound of the animals in the wild, the way the world spread out in front of you vast and unclaimed. 

Joel, Ellie and Julie had been easing you back into it. Julie asked you for help collecting fruit for one of her cocktail plans one day. You’d been hesitant but she convinced you, your whole body stiff the entire two hours you were outside, hyperaware of everything around you. But because you were so aware, you noticed everything too, things you’d missed like the rustle of the grass and the way the air smelled. You were a little more willing to go then. 

Ellie told you she wanted to practice shooting as she got ready to go back out on patrol, taking some time off from it after everything that happened. She asked you when Joel was busy and Olivia was there to take over at the stables and you knew it was contrived but you went with her, anyway. She kept you talking, pointing out different birds and asking questions about things that you knew she knew the answer to but it did make you miss being out in the wild more. When you told her you knew better, Ellie kept pretending she had no idea what you were talking about. 

Joel, at least, hadn’t tried to couch it in anything. He’d been holding you one morning when neither of you had to be anywhere, his fingers trailing gently up and down your arm. 

“Been thinkin’,” he said quietly before pressing his lips to your forehead. “We should take the horses out, go on a short trail ride.” 

You frowned. 

“Why? They’ve been gettin’ plenty of exercise, don’t have any that need to be tested outside of town right now…” 

“Because you could use it,” he said. You stiffened but he kept tracing his fingers over you, up and down.

“Joel…” 

“You’ve been gettin’ out here and there,” he said gently. “And I know you miss it.” 

“I miss how it used to be,” you corrected him. “It’s different now.” 

“Don’t have to be,” he said. “Just come with me.” 

You sighed, but he kept going. 

“Just a few hours, not gonna take you far,” he said. “I’ll keep you safe.” 

You pressed your lips together into a thin line, trying to calm your nerves as he pulled back to look at you, his eyes locked on yours. 

“Would I try to get you to do somethin’ that wasn’t safe?” He asked gently. You gave him a look and he smiled a little. “I’ve got you, baby. Just you and me where you can open the horses up and get back out in the trees a little. I’ll be there the whole time, I’ve got you. S’OK.” 

His eyes were so soft and his face was so open that you sighed and agreed. The first time had been scary. You only went for a few hours but you couldn’t relax the entire time you were gone, fully outside what felt like Jackson’s control for the first time since you’d come back. But Joel was right. He stuck close to you the entire time, always watching for any kind of threat, always ready to protect you. You made it back to Jackson in one piece, the only shots fired to take down a few stray infected ambling through the area. 

He gradually got you to leave the walls of the town more and more, even convincing you to bring Savvy and Ellie along one day, and you realized - as you sat on a picnic blanket with your husband and daughters - that the safety may not have been the walls of the city after all. It may have just been Joel. 

You felt comfortable now, outside Jackson with the man who had become your home, your safest place, your husband twice over. The trees were thinning, four hours into your ride and off the more beaten path. You looked at Joel, brows raised and he smiled. 

“That’s where we’re headed,” he said. “When we get to there, go ahead and open ‘er up, you’ll know where to go.” 

“So mysterious,” you teased and he shrugged, smirking a little, as you broke through the trees. 

The sight was almost damn near idyllic, a small lake that was clear as glass, a cabin with a big front porch complete with a swing sitting on the other side of it. You looked at Joel, mouth open in shock. 

“Me n’Tommy found it few months back,” he smiled. “Been fixin’ it up. Plenty of space for us, the girls, anyone they want to bring along. But… wanted to break it in right, just you and me. Besides, pretty sure I’ve owed you a honeymoon for a while now.” 

You laughed, almost giddy, and pushed Renaissance into a full gallop, skirting along the edge of the water, standing in the stirrups so the air sent the skirt of your dress billowing out behind you. You rode her up to the porch, slipping out of the saddle before she’d come to a full stop, too excited to get a look at the place. You realized there was a small dock just off the porch, a rowboat tied to the side of it, and wildflowers among the grass outside the cabin. 

“I do OK?” Joel asked, getting off Ares and coming up alongside you. 

“This is amazing,” you said, awed, as you took it all in. “I can’t believe you did all this, it’s…” 

You couldn’t find the words, just looking at him, a small smile on his lips. 

“C’mon,” he said, taking your hand and leading you up the front steps. He opened the front door but stopped you from going through it. “You gonna let me carry my wife across the threshold? Always wanted to do that with you in a wedding dress.” 

You laughed a little and draped your arms around his neck. 

“Think that can be arranged.” 

He bent and swept you off your feet and into his arms, making you laugh. 

“Then let’s go, Mrs. Miller.” 

He carried you through the front door and into the living room, some faded couches and mismatched arm chairs around a fireplace. Behind them was a table big enough to have the whole family gathered around it, a set of stairs beyond that and a kitchen off to the side. There was a bundle of wildflowers in a jar of water in the middle of the table, a shelf of board games and cards sitting next to the hearth. 

“Give me a few minutes to get the horses settled,” he said, setting you down and kissing your temple. “Then I’ll show you the best part of this place.” 

You took your time taking in the place, how much care you could tell Joel and Tommy had put into it. You could see places in the wall that had been patched, shelves that had been mounted. There were stores of canned foods in the cupboards, a canister of tea, a jar of honey, even a pair of matching mugs, both chipped with little owls on them that made you smile. In the living room, there was art on the walls: one of a horse grazing in an open field and another of a deer standing next to a moose in a clearing. You smiled, leaning in closer to see Ellie’s signature in the corner. 

“She wanted to contribute,” Joel said from behind you and you turned to face him. He set packs down on the couch and you smiled as he came to you, putting his arms around your waist and tugging you against him. He trailed his lips along your forehead, your temple, down toward your throat, his hands slipping up your sides to slide into the low neck of your dress, making you moan. 

“Want to see my favorite part about this place?” He asked, heat on his voice. You just nodded  and he pushed the top of the dress down, bearing your chest to him. “No one around for miles. All alone out here. So I can have you all to myself, naked, in that water out there.” 

He took the globes of your breasts in his large hands, cradling the weight of them gently in his palms, squeezing you and you groaned at his touch. He kissed you, dipping his tongue into your mouth and you pulled at the buttons of his shirt, opening them one by one. 

“Should get me naked then,” you said breathlessly when he pulled away from you ever so slightly. “That water looks awful inviting.” 

You undressed each other quickly then, Joel’s shirt and pants ending up in a heap on the floor, your dress draped over the couch. He took your hand and led you outside, pulling you along into the cool water. It was smooth and clear on your skin, the sandy bottom of the lake soft on your toes. He pulled you deeper, until the water was up to your shoulders, before tugging you against him. You smiled and he tilted your head so he could kiss you, his thumb over your cheek, fingers curving around the back of your neck. 

“I can’t believe you did all this,” you said quietly as he held you close. His thick, hard cock was pressed against your stomach, your breasts pressed against his wet skin. “You didn’t have to…”

“I wanted to,” he smiled, his forehead against yours. “I want to give you everything, baby.” 

You reached and put your arms around his neck, arching your back against him. 

“You already have,” you said softly. “You gave me you.” 

His hands drifted lower, cupping the round of your ass and lifting you so you could wrap your legs around his waist. His cock was pressed against your slit and you moaned at the feel of it, the way the water and the tip of him moved against your clit already making your pussy tighten. He lifted you, dragging the thick of his length over your sex until he notched his head at your entrance and he moaned. 

“Goddamn baby,” he said, voice tense with want. “Can feel how warm you are inside already…” 

He pulled you down onto him, his cock pressing into you slowly, slow enough that you could feel how he opened you to him, stretching you around him. You groaned, burying your face in his neck and breathing in the smell of him. 

“Fuck you feel good,” his mouth trailed over your neck, your bare shoulder. “So goddamn good, taking me so well…” 

Your fingers sank into his skin and you pressed yourself impossibly closer and tighter to him as he bottomed out inside you, your clit pressed against the base of his stomach, the whole of him thick and heavy inside you. 

“Joel,” you whimpered. “You’re so deep, feel so good…” 

“I know, sweetheart,” he breathed, taking his hands from your ass to your back to clutch you close. “I know.” 

He held you close and tight and you managed to pull your face from his neck to look at him, your eyes on his, noses brushing, breathing into each other as the water cradled you both. You moved together, every rock of your hips and thrust of his slow and aching. You weren’t able to tell where he ended and you began and you could feel his breath quickening as the heat inside you grew stronger, your channel getting tighter. 

“Want you to come for me,” he whispered, voice trembling. “Need to feel you, come on baby and come for me.” 

You could only moan in response, his thrusts growing firmer as you pressed your clit against his skin, his arms tightening around you. You were right on the edge, so close exploding around him. 

“Come with me,” you managed, clinging to him. “Please, I need to make you come, please…” 

He cut you off with a kiss, swallowing your needy sounds, moving in you desperate and claiming. Your orgasm built higher and higher, drawing you so tight around him it seemed impossible until he pulled you so close it almost hurt, body flush to his as you felt him come undone inside of you. 

It only took a moment for the pulsing of his cock to set off your own orgasm, making you throb and flutter around him as rope after rope of his come filled you. For a moment, it was as though you and Joel were the only people left in the world, the way he was around and inside you the only thing you could be sure of then. 

He held you after both your orgasms eased, his softening length still inside you, your head on his shoulder, your arms around him as his lips brushed your neck. The water was still and quiet around you, a soft breeze on the air and you smiled against his skin, a sense of peace settling over you as you did. 

It had taken so long to reach this point, so many years of pain and healing, so much you needed to move past. But it had all led you here, where you were together, where everyone you loved was safe and happy and you didn’t need to be afraid anymore. 

Joel’s hand trailed slowly up and down your spine and he pressed a kiss into your skin. 

“I’m so happy we got here,” you said quietly. 

You felt him smile against your shoulder. 

“Me too, Bambi,” he said, kissing you again before pulling back from him just enough to look you in the eye. “Come a long way in the last few years.” 

You smiled a little. 

“Hard to believe,” you said. “I didn’t think I’d ever have something like this. I didn’t know it was possible to have something like this.” 

“Me, too,” he said. “Makes it feel like all the shit we went through to get here was worth it.” 

“Yeah,” you said, kissing him gently. “It does.” 

You looked in his eyes, just appreciating him for a moment, the tan of his skin and the gray of his hair and the wrinkles and the scars that told the story of everything that he’d survived and felt deeply that he was one of the most beautiful things you’d ever held. 

“So,” he said after a few minutes. “Since this is a honeymoon and all, we got the place to ourselves for as long as we want it but figure we’ll want to get back to the girls before too long. What are you thinkin’ baby?” 

You hummed for a moment, considering. 

“Well,” you said. “I do miss the girls. But… I like having you all to myself. Think I want to stay here, where I can take advantage of the fact that I can get you naked whenever I want, for at least a few days. Maybe a week.” 

He smiled. 

“Week sounds good,” he said. 

“Plus,” you said. “We can always come back in the future. Have as many honeymoons as we want.” 

“Yeah,” he smiled wider. “We can. We got time.” 

You kissed your husband, soft and slow, before pulling away and smiling back at him. 

“We do,” you said. “We have all the time in the world.” 

A/N:

Hi, everyone!

I cannot believe we are here. Exactly one year ago today I published the first chapter of Yearling and now I'm publishing the last.

Thank you so so so much for going on this journey with me, Joel and Bambi. These characters have meant so much to me over the past year and it has been just an absolute joy to share them with you. I hope you've enjoyed how they've grown together and built the life they'll have from here on out.

If you'd like to keep reading what I'm sharing, I am starting up another few fics. There's an AU of Yearling that you can find here and I am working on another Joel fic that is a no-outbreak AU where Joel is reader's bodyguard. It's called The Savage and the Sanctuary and you can find that here.

I've always been bad at saying goodbye, so I won't do that. I will just say thank you for coming on this adventure with me and for all the love and support you've shared. I hope to see you again soon.

Be well, take care of yourselves, and spread a little kindness in the world.

Love you!!

Taglist: @ashleymsnodgrass@planet-marz1@kalea-bane @juneswonderlust @ilovepedro @h-annahayy @starstruckmusiciansartghost @beccerjune @mumma-moonchild @netonetoneto @mellymbee @purplelye @n7cje @flugazi @evyiione @randomhoex @aliengirl99 @orcasoul @reds-ramblings @pedropascalsbbg @fupoola @tinypotatothing @knopes-waffles @lilmizmoz @ayamenimthiriel @jenispunk @panda-pascal @sarap-77 @flugazi @your-slutty-gf @daniegraceg @partyofone3413 @cumberpegg @noisynightmarepoetry. @fifia-writes @grumpygrumperton @srmacaroni @txlady37 @bigboiseason123 @ashleyfilm @arizonadreamingg

[holylulusworld]

The assistant (10) - Apologies

Summary: You are invisible most of the time.

Pairing: Former!Boss!Steve Rogers x Former!Assistant(plussized)!Reader

Possible pairing: Jake Jensen x Reader, Lloyd Hansen x Reader, Curtis Everett x Reader, Ari Levinson x Reader, Andy Barber x Reader, Mike Weiss x Reader, Ransom Drysdale x Reader

Warnings: angst, flirty CEvans characters, language, plus-sized/chubby reader, protective brothers, Lloyd being Lloyd, arguments, fighting, violence, brothers being brothers, choking (non-sexual), injuries

A/N: We are back to business and bam, did I just add another brother? Yes. No. Maybe.

The assistant masterlist

The assistant (9) - Revenge for champions

Lloyd reluctantly opens the gate for Steve. He eyes the captain warily, and huffs. “Captain Asshole.” He grunts.

“Kidnapper,” Steve bites back. Like promised, he came in civilian clothes, and without his shield. He’s carrying a duffle bag while surveilling the property on his way toward the mansion.

“I see Captain Asshat came,” Ari sneers at Steve. He looks the captain up and down, wondering what everything sees in the blonde.

“Play nice, Ari,” Andy warns. He doesn’t like having Steve on their property either, but this way, the brothers have control over the situation. And he made a few calls. Things will go according to his plan, not Steve’s. “No killing Captain America.”

Lloyd snorts. “Speak for yourself, not me. If he only breathes wrong, he’ll bite a bullet.”

“Ah, we already reached the status of threatening,” Curtis steps out of the mansion, his muscular arms crossed over his chest. “Jake checks on the cameras, and Mike is doing Pilates or crap with Y/N.”

“If he touched her,” Steve wants to jump at Curtis. “I’ll break his neck.”

“Whoa…whoa,” Lloyd points his index finger at Steve. “If anyone breaks our little chaos’s neck, it’s me. He’s my brother, not yours.”

Andy coughs and looks away. He doesn’t know how to tell his brothers whom he called to join forces with them. If they must fight Captain America and the Avengers, they’ll need every help they can get.

“So, uh—” he loosens his tie. “We should talk about something before we let him inside. I made a few calls and asked for a favor.”

“You asked for a favor?” Curtis turns his head to look at his brother. “Andy, what did you do? I hope you don’t try to bullshit us with your lawyer crap again.”

“I wish it was only about lawyer crap…” Andy looks at the still-open gate. He huffs and removes his tie. “I called someone to join us today.”

“Another guest?” Lloyd rolls his eyes. “Andy, we’ve got our hands full with Captain Turd over there. I don’t have the nerves to handle our little chaos, Cappy and another guest.”

“Here we go…” Ari sighs when a car drives through the open gate. He shakes his head before punching Andy’s arm. “He’s an outcast, brother. How dare you call him?”

“He’s still our brother,” Andy argues. “I mean…yeah…he chose another family over us, and his love for money is making me sick but…”

“Andrew Barber, there is no but!” Lloyd lunges at his brother. He has his hand around Andy’s throat to slam him into the wall.

“Whoa, stop it!” Ari struggles to drag Lloyd off his brother. “We don’t kill each other, Lloyd. Save your energy for our real enemies.”

“He invited Ransom fucking Drysdale, Ari! How could he? That bastard said we are not brothers,” Curtis yells as said man gets out of his brand-new car. “You! Get off our property!”

Curtis storms toward Ransom to punch his face. “You fucker!” Ransom dodges the next punch. He likes the finer things in life but didn’t forget how to fight. “Andy called me!”

“What is this all about—” Jake and Mike stop in their tracks. While Ari tries to keep Lloyd from strangling Andy, Curtis and Ransom throw punches at each other. “Guys! What’s going on here?”

“So, this is how you keep Y/N safe?” Steve huffs. He drops his duffle bag to the ground to storm past Jake and Mike. “I’ll get her out of this madhouse!”

“Buddy, you better stay out,” Jake puts his hand on Steve’s chest to stop him and make things worse. He doesn’t stand a chance against Captain America, but right now, he gives a shit.

“GUYS!” you stomp your foot. “What is going on here?” You storm toward Lloyd to slap his shoulder. “Lloyd, let go of Andy. Ari same goes for you. Stop hitting your brother’s back.”

“But—” Lloyd pouts. “He…and then…and he invited the gold-digger!”

“I don’t care, Lloyd Hansen,” you poke his arm. “We do not hurt the people we love. I want you to apologize to your brother.” You harrumph and tap your foot. “Lloyd, apologize to your brother or there will be no dessert for you.”

Lloyd’s eyes darken. He looks at your crotch and hums. “I love me some dessert, Cupcake. What do you have to offer?”

��Not that, you little pervert,” you slap the back of his head. “Now play nice, Lloyd.”

“Fine,” he pouts. “I’m sorry for choking you.” He looks at Andy, not sorry at all.

“Ari, your turn,” you point at Ari. “I’m waiting. There will be no head massage and hair pulling for you if you do not apologize for slapping your brother.”

“Is it just me, or is this kind of hot?” Lloyd grins. He’s happy that he isn't the only one who got in trouble this time.

“Lloyd, I’m sorry for slapping your back. Even though you deserved it and I only tried to keep you from choking Andy to death.”

“Very well,” you clap your hands and turn your attention toward Mike. “Are you okay? Did one of them hurt you too?”

“No, I’m good but—” He points at Curtis and Ransom. They are tangled in each other, fighting for control. “Uh-we should stop them too…”

“Christ on a cracker!” You throw your hands up. “You…” you point at Steve. “Hands off Jake.” You look at Jake. “Jakie, no violence. How about you and Mike talk some sense into your brothers.”

“Sure, Sweetie,” Jake relaxes when you press a soft kiss on his cheek. “But if he blinks, I’ll smash him with my laptop.”

“Fair,” you nod and walk toward Curtis and Ransom. Curtis tries to wrestle Ransom to the ground while Ransom tries to kick Curtis’s shin. “Guys, what’s your problem?”

“Hey,  Sunshine,” Curtis pants. He pushes Ransom to the ground, grabs his arm, and twists it. “We are good, Y/N. Just give me a minute to convince my brother to leave our property.”

“Another brother,” you crouch down to get a better look at the man on the ground. “You really are the seven dwarfs.” You smirk at the man staring up at you. He grins and licks his lips.

“Oh, that’s a nice new addition,” Ransom purrs. “Tell me, Sugar. Whom do you belong to?”

“She’s our friend, stop hitting on her,” Curtis puts his foot onto Ransom’s chest. “You are not welcome here.”

Ransom sucks his lower lip in. “She belongs to all of you.” He whistles. “You’re a sweet thing. Hmm…I can think of a thing or two to make you happy.”

“Ransom!” Jake grunts. “Don’t talk like that to Y/N!”

“Curtis, let his arm go,” you place your hand on Curtis’s shoulder to calm him. “People are watching.” You whisper. “We don’t want to draw too much attention toward us. Remember?”

“You’re lucky she stopped me,” Curtis drops Ransom’s arm and steps away. “If not I’d rip your arm out to slap you to death with it.”

“Curtis!” You tut. “Why are you so angry at him?”

“He left us when we needed him the most,” Lloyd wraps his arm protectively around your shoulders. “We were barely fifteen, and that bastard talked some rich people into adopting him. They wanted an heir, and he wanted to get away from us.”

“Can you blame me for not wanting to end up being a mobster and get shot dead? I wanted more from life than that. Just like Andy. But he’s here, parading around the mansion!” Ransom growls. “You forgave him for leaving, but not me. I was a kid looking for hope.”

“You’re a gold-digging whore wanting shiny things, nothing else,” Lloyd spits on the ground next to Ransom. “I suggest you stay far away from me, and Y/N.”

“Lloyd…” Andy sighs. “Please stop this shit. You can’t expect all of us to want the same things you want from life. We tried a different life, okay. The moment you called I was there. Just like Ransom came here after I asked him for help.”

“He won’t get one of the good bedrooms,” Lloyd pecks your cheek before he turns to walk inside the mansion to calm down. “We should head inside and…” he looks at the still-open gate. “Can someone close the fucking gate?”

“So…” you press a cool pack to Curtis’s cheek, “Ransom is the last brother or are there more of you?”

“You can’t get enough of us, huh?” Ari smirks. He bandages his hand while glaring at Lloyd sitting across from him. “You didn’t have to choke Andy.”

“You didn’t have to…” Lloyd mimics Ari. “I do whatever the fuck I want to do.”

Jake and Mike keep out of their fight. They busy themselves watching Steve. The captain sulks in a corner while you play nurse for the brothers.

After offering a cool pack to Ransom and taping his split eyebrow, you took care of Curtis. “Press the cool pack to your cheek. It will help.”

“Thank you, Sunshine,” Curtis sighs when you run your hand over his head. “You’re the best.”

“Andy, no. We need to put something on that too,” you sniffle looking at Andy’s bruised neck. You carefully touch his skin. “Lloyd, you should be ashamed of hurting your brother like that. This is not okay.”

“I said I’m sorry,” Lloyd grumbles under his breath. “He had it coming. What’s a good choking among brothers, right?” He flashes you a smile. “Come on, that one was funny.”

“Not if anyone gets hurt, Lloyd,” you tut. “I thought we wanted to prove to Captain Rogers that I’m safe with all of you. The moment he set foot onto your ground you started fighting each other.”

Steve crosses his arms over his chest. He watches you and listens closely. This is his chance. If he can convince you that the brothers are dangerous, you’ll follow him.

Part 11

Tags in reblog.

[a-pastel-edgelord]

Hospitality

major spoilers of the final arc of kny reader beware

The first snowfall of the year is quiet. The squeaking crunch of Tomioka Giyuu's footsteps is the only notable sound to reach his ears. It's well into the day, with the sun already threatening to set, deep orange and purple creating a luminous effect in the untouched snow around him. The trees stand tall and cast deep grooves of shadow over the path, but Tomioka knows these roads well. He's not expected at Tengen's for another few days—the family had invited him to take in the New Year with them and their newest arrivals. He'd graciously accepted, their boisterous household is always a pleasure to visit (as long as one did not linger too long).

The only problem is that the cold seems to be getting to him. It sinks into his wounds, though they healed months ago, and makes them ache as though they are still recovering. Tomioka grits his teeth—it's nothing. His friends lost their lives, so how could he be here feeling sorry for himself? It's ridiculous, he just needs to push through—his knees buckle. He stumbled forward, catching himself at the last moment. Damn, damn, damn! He takes a breath, Total Concentration—he chokes and heaves like he's trying to cough out his lungs. As Shinazugawa would say, this shit is fucked.

Tomioka drops to one knee, clutching at his chest. Just a little further and he could— "Oh my! Sir, are you alright?!" A voice from behind him calls, and he nearly slaps himself for being so out of it he couldn't hear another person approaching.

The yellow light of a lantern bleeds its way into his vision, making his shadow longer. Someone kneels down next to him. "Sir? Ah, please excuse me." The stranger takes him by the shoulders and adjusts him so they can peer into his face. Tomioka's breath catches again as a hand touches his cheek with the sort of tenderness he'd long forgotten. And now he can see your face in return for you seeing his.

You hum thoughtfully as you look him over. Your eyes barely pausing over the space where his right arm should be. He can see the speed of your mind reflected in your gaze. Finally, you nod to yourself. "Alright, sir. You're not well—my home is still a little ways out. I'll have you warmed up in no time at all."

Giyuu stiffens for a moment, ready to refuse your generous offer, but his words die in his tongue as you lift him across your shoulders and take off at a steady jogging pace. Stunned into silence, he stares at the ground passing beneath him before craning around to look at you. "You don't need to carry me--"

"It's not trouble!" You puff. "The faster we get home, the faster we can start a fire!"

So, there's nothing for him to do but to accept your hospitality. It takes another ten minutes of travel, but sure enough you break out of the tree and sigh. "There it is!" You increase the pace, now nearly at a run, and he's left to bounce against your shoulders. It's not the most uncomfortable he's been, all things considered. He spots a water wheel on the east end of the house before he's carried inside.

You plunk him down in front of the dark hearth, not bothering to take off your or his shoes. He sheds his damp outer layers, folding them neatly. You go to a closet, grab a quilt and drape it around his shoulders, taking a moment to consider him... before grabbing another one and placing it around his head, thoroughly tucking him in. You leave the lantern next to him.

Is this how swaddled children feel?

You light a fire, place a heavy bottomed pot over the hearth and pour water into and cover it with a wooden lid. Shedding your own winter layers and shoes, you shuffle over, laying the clothing flat across the floor to dry. You do the same with his. You fetch a quilt for yourself and finally settle across from him, bundled up.

The ache in his body eases the longer he sits in the warmth. You place a bowl full of ingredients into the boiling pot. "There won't be any rice, I hope that's ok."

Tomioka blinks. "Why would I begrudge you a lack of rice? You are my savior."

"And you are my guest." You reply easily. "I may only live in a humble water mill, but I still wish for you to be comfortable."

He glances down at quilts piled atop of him. "This may be the most comfortable I have been in a long time."

There's a beat of silence, and Giyuu realizes that he said something rather odd. But before he can rectify the statement, a smile so bright it puts the fire to shame plants itself on your face. "That is a great compliment... or perhaps it speaks to the rough nature of your travels. Where is your destination?"

"Another couple days' travel west."

"I see, are you visiting family for the New Year?"

"A friend has invited me to spend the holiday with him and his family. He recently became a father. I think he wishes to show off."

You clap your hands together. "How wonderful! And have you decided on a gift?"

"A gift?"

"Yes, for the new parents and baby. It's traditional, is it not?" He stares. You look back into his face before understanding dawns. "You... have not thought of it."

He brings up his left hand to bury his face in it. What a fool. He can't believe he didn't think of anything. Mortification heats him and makes him long for the embrace of the snow outside.

"Don't worry!" You say bracingly. "Tea and sweets are always welcome gifts! Mrs. Tanaka has such things, her son is a merchant, and I'm sure we can trade her for a day's worth of work for a couple of boxes of sweets and tea."

Tomioka looks up. "We?"

"Oh, yes. I was planning on going tomorrow to strike up a deal. She knew my parents and has always been very kind. I've no doubt she can accommodate you as well." You practically shine with enthusiasm.

And really, how was he meant to turn down your kindness? You managed to save him from a social faux pas, it's the least he can do. A day's worth of work means he'll likely spend the night here again before continuing on to his destination. He's indebted to you; he should think of a way to repay you.

The answer comes in the form of a Kasugai crow, Nijimaru to be precise. Giyuu sent out his own crow (Kanzaburo is now safely retired) the morning after his first night at the water mill to inform Tengen of his possible delay.

"Caw-haw-haw! Bring your benefactor to New Years! The more, the merrier! So says Master Tengen!"

Well, that solves his problem on how to repay your generosity.

[fortheloveofwonderland]

Rusty | Chapter 24 FINAL | S.R

Previous Chapter

A/N - not originally where I planned to take this it felt right for me to take the fic in this direction. There is a happy ending but I guess it’s kinda bittersweet?

Summary - Spencer takes one final blow in regards to his health and Luke makes a decision. Will you and Spencer get your happy ending or were you just too rusty?

Pairing - Spencer Reid / Fem! Reader

Category - strangers to friends to lovers | angst | smut minors DNI

Warnings - heavy hospital talk, swearing, terminal illness, DID, catheterisation and urination, medication, lots of tears, hints at oral (m receiving), penetrative, unprotected sex.

WC - 6.3k

Chapter 24 - Bless the Broken Road

Over the next few days, Spencer started gaining some independence. But with the ups came some terrible lows. 

He was gradually weaned off of the ventilator, which was an experience in itself. Doctor Wells was confident in his ability to breathe on his own. However his chest x-ray hadn't yielded entirely good news and she confirmed her unfortunate findings with tissue samples. One thing at a time. She would get Spencer off the vent and then have the conversation.

He was given a mild sedative to relax his airways and calm his nerves. He was conscious but hazy which was for the best. 

His tube was suctioned one more time before Doctor Wells started slowly decreasing the ventilator's support and monitoring his response. 

His lungs kicked back into gear albeit leisurely. At first he struggled to remember how to take his own breaths, still heavily relying on the ventilator and gasping a little between each staggered inhale and exhale. 

Doctor Wells continued to lower the machine, while he desperately fought to breathe on his own. Once the machine was completely disconnected, the tube still down in his throat in case he needed the vent suddenly, he was subjected to spontaneous breathing trials. 

For over an hour he was watched closely by the doctor while he sat in bed and simply breathed. Every now and again he would gasp, stutter out a ragged breath and heave air back into his lungs. 

She reminded him to stay calm, to just let it happen naturally which was hard given he’d had something breathing for him for nearly a week. 

She monitored his oxygen levels and vitals and was pleased with his progress even if he didn’t think his breathing felt at all normal. She assured him it was all par for the course. 

After she was suitably pleased with his breathing, his lungs feeling like they were ready to expand right out of his chest, she informed him she would be extubating him. 

The feeling of the breathing tube being removed from his throat caused him to gag violently and cough so hard it burnt. His breathing became completely erratic and he silently begged to just be hooked back up to the machine.

It’s too hard, can’t do it alone. Can’t remember how to breathe on my own. Can’t do it. Can’t remember. S’too hard, please? 

“Doctor Reid, you’re doing great. It’s okay to feel some anxiety, it’s perfectly normal. Just breathe in and out like you’ve been doing your entire life.” 

At first he was inhaling too sharply, through his nose and sending the air spiralling too quickly into his exhausted lungs. 

Why can’t I remember how to breathe? Been doing it since you were born. It was six days, you can do this you fucking idiot. 

After several long minutes his breathing started to return to something close to normal although he had to concentrate extremely hard on each breath. 

Doctor Wells provided him with a nasal cannula although instructed he try to only use it when he really felt he needed it.

She explained it would be an adjustment. His respiratory muscles needed to generate the necessary force to move air in and out, and those muscles had been depleted whilst on the vent. 

“Can you try swallowing for me, Doctor Reid?” She asked him once he started getting his breathing somewhat under control. 

He did. And it felt magnificent. He did it again. Then she handed him some blessed water for his extremely dry throat but told him he had to sip slowly, despite wanting to guzzle it down. 

The water was glorious, quenching his hideous throat and mouth. It was such a wonderful reprieve and he relished every second. 

“Do you think you can try and talk for me now?” Doctor Wells encouraged after he finished the cup of water. 

He rolled his cracked lip between his teeth - a small action he’d missed being able to do - before gently nodding his head. 

He cleared his throat and sucked in a breath which caused his lungs to freak out and he started coughing. 

Another cup of water and several minutes of trying to calm him down he sat back against his pillows feeling a little light headed. But he persevered. 

“H-hello.” His voice was so croaky he barely registered it was his own. 

It made his throat tickle and he almost succumbed to another coughing fit but thankfully breathed through it. 

“Great, and again?” Wells prompted. 

Does she have any idea how difficult it was just to say that? 

He fought the urge to huff another breath for fear of sending his lungs into a panic again. He’d wanted his first words to be to tell you how much he loved you but since your first time visiting him yesterday you were yet to return. 

You’d stayed with him for a few hours and talked to him while he listened and dozed in and out of sleep. You talked to him about Willow and Rusty and Copper, told him Grant and Luke were staying with you and how weird it was. He continuously tapped away on your hand, repeating his morse code mantra. 

dot-dot. dot-dash-dot-dot. dash-dash-dash. dot-dot-dot-dash. dot. dash-dot-dash-dash. dash-dash-dash. dot-dot-dash. 

And to his knowledge he hadn’t dissociated or slipped into one of his alters once the whole time you were there. However, as soon as you left the old ghosts had reared their ugly head and chatted amongst themselves until he willfully fell asleep. 

Doctor Wells was watching him expectantly, waiting for him to speak. He had no idea what he was supposed to say, it was a very strange and new experience. But despite everything, he forced his voice to cooperate.

“H-hello, I am S-Spen…Spe-Spencer Reid.” The effort with which it took him to say those five words caused a heat to spread to his lungs again and he was huffing and puffing once they were out. 

Doctor Wells was quick to hand him the nasal cannula which he gratefully took from her, stuffing the little tubes inside his nostrils and deeply inhaling the sweet, sweet oxygen. And that was when she decided to deliver the blow. 

“Doctor Reid…Spencer,” her expression changed and Spencer knew that look, he’d used it so many times in his FBI career.

Bad news. She has bad news. Oh god I’m dying aren’t I? Oh fuck you’ve really done it this time. 

His head started to spin, his vision blurring. 

No, no don’t dissociate now, you need to understand what she has to say.

He focused himself on his breathing, squeezed the bedsheets in his hand. He needed to stay present, stay focused. The fuzzy edges of his vision became slowly sharper. 

We can do this, just be Spencer. 

“W-what is it?” He spoke breathily. “Just tell me, please?” 

“I’m afraid there is no easy way to say this.” Doctor Wells sighed. “During your chest x-ray we found some scarring on your lungs and the diagnosis was confirmed by having your tissue samples analysed. I’m afraid it appears you’ve developed pulmonary fibrosis, I trust you know what this is?” 

Spencer’s jaw clenched. He focused on keeping himself as Spencer, not allowing the alters to take over. Not now, he needed just a moment to deal with this himself. 

“I-I…” hardened, thickened lung tissue, makes it hard to breathe, harder over time. Shortness of breath, coughing fits, constant fatigue. “Y-yes.” 

“It is terminal, Doctor Reid, and it is progressive. However, we caught it early and although it's not curable it is treatable. It is possible that you can live for years with this disease if properly treated.” She smiled softly, her tone laced with melancholia. 

“But it w-will kill me? O-one day?” He stuttered. 

“I’m afraid so. And we have no way to know how long that will take. The average life span is generally three to five years, but I’m hopeful you can beat those odds.” 

He sucked in the oxygen through his nose, biting back a cough. His breaths were coming in short, sharp bursts. 

Better get used to that, never going to be able to breathe properly again. 

“I want to get you started on medication right away. I’m going to prescribe pirfenidone which will help slow the lung scarring, but won’t be able to reverse it. We can set you up with at home oxygen therapy once you are discharged, portable oxygen cylinders with nasal cannulas that you can use when you feel the need. 

“I can enrol you in a pulmonary rehabilitation which will help you stay active without over exerting yourself and will improve how easily you will be able to do every day tasks. This sadly doesn’t end well, Doctor Reid, as you know. But with your age and the fact we caught it early, I do believe you can live a long, relatively normal life.” 

“But not as l-long as if I didn’t h-have this, right?” He felt the tears well in his eyes.

“Right.” She agreed. 

Well done, Reid you did it. You wanted to kill yourself and ultimately got your wish. It's just going to be a slow, painful death while your lungs steadily give up on you. 

“I, uh, can I b-be alone, p-please?” He let the tears fall, rolling his head on the pillow away from the doctor.

“Of course.” She nodded and he heard her push the chair back.

“And I d-don’t want…my friends, d-don’t tell them this. I’ll t-tell them when I’m ready. N-not yet.” His chest stuttered with each painful breath. Was it normal that his lungs hurt more now he knew this?

“Of course Doctor Reid, that’s your call. But I will say that it helps to have people around while you’re dealing with something like this. Your life will be exceedingly different now and you will need people to aid your adjustment. You aren’t going to be able to do all the things you used to do, accepting help from people who love you will greatly improve your quality of life and even lengthen it.” Doctor Wells spoke but she could see he was no longer listening.

She could tell by the glazed look in his eyes he wasn’t even Spencer anymore. 

Somewhere in the deep recesses of his fractured mind, Spencer registered her words. But his presenting alter wasn’t listening. 

“Look what you’ve gone and done you fucking puta. After everything you survived, this is what you’re going to let kill you? Mierda, what a waste of such a perfect cock sucking mouth.” 

Lea-leave me al-alone. I c-can’t. Can’t. Not now. P-please just let me pro-process. 

Spencer Reid who wasn’t Spencer Reid cried himself into a fitful sleep while his slowly dying lungs tried desperately to keep him alive a little while longer. 

***

Three days later Spencer was dealing with his diagnosis the way he always dealt with things - by ignoring them. 

He’d started PT to aid his breathing for his disused lungs which he thought was pointless seeing that they were giving up on him anyway. 

He was off his catheter and allowed to move about as long as he had his portable oxygen tank at his disposal. 

Coming off of the catheter offered him a distraction from his illness albeit not a particularly nice one. The feeling of having a full bladder was an uncomfortable and new experience. He’d gotten so used to the catheter draining his urine constantly he’d forgotten what it was like to need to go. 

He often found himself not quite making it to the bathroom before he expelled himself, once in bed and a few times on the floor on route to the toilet. And when did go it was painful and oftentimes he wasn’t able to empty his bladder to the extent he needed and was left feeling dissatisfied. 

It was slowly starting to pass, he was at least able to make it to the bathroom before urinating himself now but the slight discomfort remained. 

He was prescribed pirfenidone for his pulmonary fibrosis and after a few meetings with Doctor Vikram she put him on a strong dose of olanzapine for his DID which was yet to go away. 

He’d refused at first, desperate to not be reliant on an antipsychotic used to treat schizophrenia. But as the days drew on and the alters grew louder and louder in his head, he decided he would do anything to make it stop. 

He was eventually able to shower which was an absolute godsend. And finally after nearly two weeks in the hospital, Spencer was allowed to be discharged. 

Honestly it felt like an absolute lifetime since he’d last stepped outside. The air seemed fresher, crisper somehow. 

Spring was in full bloom and he wished he could properly smell the flowers over his nasal cannula which was attached to the little canister of oxygen that Luke insisted on wheeling for him even though he was perfectly capable. 

He still hadn’t told any of you about his diagnosis, he simply lied and said he’d need the oxygen for a little while until his lungs would get back to their full capacity, knowing they never would. 

Luke drove home, Grant sitting up front and you in the back with Spencer, hand in hand. He leaned his head back against the headrest and closed his eyes, slipping the nose cannula out and letting it hang around his neck.  

He wasn’t supposed to use it all the time anyway, only when he really needed it. Although his lungs did noticeably burn when he wasn’t using it. 

He just wanted to enjoy this moment with you, knowing it would all soon be over. None of you had discussed what happened now but you all knew it was inevitable. 

It was late and so Spencer offered Luke and Grant to stay one last night, more out of wanting one final night with you before Luke carted you away to federal prison. 

Grant cooked a large meal for which Spencer barely touched, he had other things on his mind. After you’d all eaten, he removed his cannula once more and let himself take in a fresh breath. 

All eyes were already on him. You were all far too smart and all knew he was keeping something from you. 

He closed his eyes briefly and pinched the bridge of his nose before opening them and looking back around the table. 

“Luke, I need you to do me a f-favour.” Spencer spoke breathily. 

“Anything man.” Luke quickly replied. 

“I need you t-to call the team. I n-need to tell you all some-something and I can only say it on-once.” He panted as he spoke.

You whimpered pathetically, reaching out and clutching his hand at the implication. Luke swallowed thickly, glancing at Grant as he freed his phone from his pocket without a word. He called Emily and put the device on speaker. It rang three times.

“Hey, Alvez. How is Reid?” She was speaking rapidly.

“I’m h-here, Emily.” He spoke before Luke could. 

“Reid, it's so good to hear your voice.” She smiled as she spoke.

“Prentiss, are you with the team?” Luke’s voice cut in. 

“Uh, yeah we’re all at the BAU, why?” 

“Can you g-gather them please? Need to…p-please?” Spencer whined, pressing his knuckles to his chest as a wave of pain pulsed through him.

“Of course, give me a minute.” Her tone was laced with the fear you all felt in the room. 

You clutched Spencer’s hand tighter, already feeling the tears well in your eyes, knowing whatever he had to say wasn’t going to be good. 

A few minutes of thick and tense silence passed before Emily was speaking again.

“We’re all here, Reid. The whole team is here.” 

Spencer nodded, lifting his cannula and holding it to his nose whilst taking a long pull on the liquid heaven that was his oxygen. He let it hang again from his neck and looked around the room. If he focused hard enough he could imagine the whole team was here with him.

“I don’t know h-how to say this other than to-to just s-say it.” Breathe, remember to breathe. “The d-doctor found scar-scarring on my lungs. She dia-diagnosed me with pulmonary fib-fibrosis.” Struggling, he picked the cannula back up and inserted it fully into his nose. “My lungs are going to slowly shut down. The thin w-walls of my l-lungs air sacs are t-thickening which m-makes it harder for t-them to get o-oxygen to the rest of my body. 

“The t-typical prognosis is th-three to f-five years, but D-Doctor Wells is h-hopeful I might out-outlive those odds. But either way this…this is going to k-kill me one d-day.” Breath, just breath. “I’m on m-medication to slo-slow the sc-scarring and I w-will need supplemental ox-oxygen. I…uh…I just needed you a-all to know. I n-need you all to know that I lo-love you all. And, uh…yeah.” 

He closed his eyes against a wave of tears and tugged the cannula back out of his nose. He leaned back in his chair, feeling your hand trembling in his own. He heard you sob loudly as the words sunk in.

Across the table a few tears had escaped Luke’s eyes, the eyes he couldn’t tear off of Spencer. Grant was gripping his shoulder, clinging to his boyfriend while he silently cried. 

Down the line was a lot of gasps and cries he discerned as belonging to Penelope and JJ. He heard the mutterings of “oh kid,” from Rossi and various other sentiments from the others. 

“Oh my gosh, Spence.” JJ sobbed, he could imagine her holding her chest the way she did when she was sad.

“Is there anything we can do? Anything at all?” Tara was speaking now, tone laced with concern and heartbreak. 

“Boy wonder, my heart, my soul.” Garcia was crying too. 

More words came swarming down the line but Spencer couldn’t comprehend them. They all had a lot of questions but Spencer was too exhausted to answer them right now. 

He promised to stay in better touch with them and he would answer everything in due course but right now he was too overwhelmed and when he got overwhelmed his ghosts like to come out to play.

He was still getting used to his olanzapine and had slipped into one of his dissociative personas once or twice in the last few days but thankfully it was already starting to become few and far between. 

He heard the voices still regularly but mostly in his head and they didn’t often come to the surface. But maybe that was more due to the fact he had far more important things on his mind. 

After the call ended he took in the teary eyes around the table as he pushed his chair back. He grabbed the handles of his wheely canister to steady his shaking legs, the cannula still hanging around his neck. You jumped up and placed your hands on his chest. He bowed his head and placed a soft kiss on your lips.

“I just need some fresh air.” He mumbled to you with a small smile.

He knew he ought to be spending every second he could with you as come morning Luke would be taking you away. But right now he just needed a second to gather his raging thoughts before he became someone he didn’t want to be. 

He wheeled the oxygen out onto the back porch, Copper following behind him. He cautiously lowered himself to the swing chair and Copper jumped up, immediately curling up at Spencer’s side. 

Spencer’s breathing was a little fraught from the short walk but he tried to calm it himself rather than constantly relying on the blessed oxygen, no matter how much he might like to. He brushed his knuckles over the smooth coat of Copper’s neck trying to keep the others from taking over his rampant thoughts.

“This is all your own fault.”

“You have no one to blame but yourself.” 

“You’ve not just hurt yourself but the people you love too. You’re no better than any of us.”

Maybe, maybe not. Doesn’t matter anymore. None of it matters anymore.

He cast his eyes out in the dark across the expanse of land down the hill. Eventually his breathing started returning to normal, or at least what was his new normal. He was surprised he was allowed any semblance of peace from the three of you but after a little while he heard the screen door open and close behind him. 

Spencer glanced up at the man who looked so much older than his years right then. Spencer imagined he didn’t look much better himself. Luke offered him a sorrowful smile as he pulled a wicker chair over to sit in front of him. 

“Hey,” Luke whispered, tears glistening in his eyes.

“Hey,” Spencer replied. 

“Love you, you know that right, cariño?” Luke sniffed heavily.

“Love you too, querido.” Spencer sniffed too but it caused him to cough a few times before he managed to stem it.  

“Life is just so fucking unfair.” Luke shook his head, his sadness suddenly replaced with malice. “This shouldn’t be happening to you. After everything you’ve already been through this should not-”

“Luke,” Spencer’s wispy voice cut him off before he could start ranting. “It’s my own f-fault. I tried to dr-drown myself, this is my ret…ret…retribution. Probably shoulda just l-let me die.” 

“Don’t say that, please don’t say that.” Luke’s tears returned and scored hot and heavy down his cheeks. 

“I’m terminally ill, I don’t get to ma-make jokes?” Spencer smiled wistfully. 

“Only if they’re funny.” Luke rolled his eyes. “Do you want me and Grant to stay out here a little while? Just until you get yourself sorted with your meds and everything?” 

“No off-offence Luke, but that sounds incredibly fu-fucking awkward.” He panted. 

“Fair enough.” Luke agreed. “Is there anything I can do?” 

Not arrest my fiancé. Don’t take her away from me. 

“No,” Spencer shook his head, patting Copper’s back. “Right n-now I’d really just l-like to take Y/N to b-bed and try and not def-deflate a lung in the p-process.” 

“Now who's making it awkward?” Luke frowned, wiping his tears. “We’ll take the guest room downstairs tonight I think.”

“Appreciate it.” Spencer reinstated his cannula and Luke helped him to his feet while Copper jumped up too. 

The two men stood under the sky, beautifully alight with the glistening stars peppering the otherwise black blanket above them. 

Luke reached out and cupped Spencer’s jaw lightly and the younger man hummed at the contact. 

“I’ll always…always…” Luke choked. 

“I k-know.” Spencer breathed. “I’ll always t-too.” 

Luke nodded, leaning closer and brushing his lips across Spencer’s in the most featherlight kiss he could almost believe he imagined it. 

But he knew he hadn’t. 

Spencer was soon turning on his heels and wheeling his canister back towards the house with Copper trotting behind while Luke remained still on the porch. 

Once Spencer was gone he pulled his phone out again and redialled the familiar number. This time she answered on the second ring.

“Hey Alvez,” Emily Prentiss had without a doubt been crying no matter how hard she tried to hide it. 

“Prentiss, sorry to just keep piling it on but…” he took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “Effective immediately, I quit the BAU.” 

***

Spencer didn’t know if it was the lack of oxygen filling his shattered lungs that made him light headed or if that could be attributed to the fact he had just experienced the most intense orgasm of his entire life.

He was on his back, panting around the cannula which was most certainly keeping him alive at that moment, staring at the ceiling while you laid next to him, curling into his side.

“I d-don’t have any wo-words.” Spencer breathed as you placed kisses on his bare chest. 

“Hmm, I did my job then.” You laughed a little wistfully. 

It was your last night together and Spencer wanted to feel everything with you before it was too late. So ignoring the voices in his head, he had finally succumbed to feeling your mouth around his shaft. 

It had been so long since he allowed someone to do that to him, he’d almost forgotten how incredible it could feel. You’d made him come in no time at all and you’d swallowed every last drop of him down. But he needed more. 

He lifted your head from his chest and kissed you, tasting the remains of his seed on your tongue. He rolled you on top of him and it was easy to feel he was already halfway to erect again. 

One hand took purchase on the back of your neck while he kissed you as fervently as his lungs would allow while the other dipped between your legs, gasping at how wet you were from simply pleasuring him. 

The gasp caused you to pull away from his lips, concerned he was struggling to breathe, which truthfully he was in spite of the cannula feeding him oxygen. His fingers slid between your folds as you looked down on him with slightly sad eyes.

“I don’t know if this is a good idea.” You whined as he brushed over your sensitive clit.

“I don’t care.” He shook his head. “Y/N, this is o-our last night together. I n-need to feel you on-one last time. P-please?” He whimpered in that breathy voice you were already growing so accustomed to.

“It could literally kill you Spen…oh fuck” You moaned as he pressed deftly against your bud. 

“I h-honestly don’t care. If th-this is how I die then I’ll con…consider myself a l-lucky man.”

“Don’t joke.” 

“Who’s joking?” He suddenly removed his hand from between your legs and wrapped it around his fully hard cock. “P-please princess, ri-ride me? We can go n-nice and slow and I’ll be f-fine.” 

Or I’ll die. But at least I’ll die doing what I love. 

“Spence, I really don’t want my last memory of you to be of you dying while I’m riding you.” You huffed. 

“If this whole t-thing has taught me a-anything it’s that our time is fin-finite. L-life is not a gu-guarantee. But love…love is infinite. And I l-love you more than wo-words can say. Let’s remember us this w-way.” He sucked in a breath around the cannula. “Whadda you say pr-princess? Hop on up here and g-give me something to rem-remember.” 

Your eyes were wet with tears as you looked down on him. Life was intrinsically unfair. In less than twelve hours Luke would be carting you away while Spencer was left here to die a slow and painful death. 

Time was finite, you knew that to be true now more so than ever. And if Spencer wanted you in that way one last time, who were you to deny him that. 

You bowed your head and captured his chapped lips in a kiss while moving his own hand aside so you could grip the base of his shaft. 

You lined him up with your entrance while sitting back on your haunches. Spencer’s eyes fell between your legs and he watched in slack jawed awe as he disappeared inside of you inch by glorious inch. 

He slowly bottomed out inside of you, your ass nestled on his thighs. He smiled up at you, breathing in through the cannula as he took in every intricate detail of your body. 

You were a work of art, sculpted by skilled hands just for him. You were magnificent in your beauty, an ethereal creature for whom he surely didn’t deserve. 

He loved every single tiny piece of you from your head to your toes and every wondrous curve in between. Even if your time together had been short, he treasured every second of it and would for the rest of his life, however long that might be. 

He gave you a soft nod, encouraging you to move. You were slow and steady in your movements, careful to listen out for any ragged breathing from him. 

Every time his pants got a little too violent you stilled to allow him to catch his breath. 

With each leisurely roll of your hips Spencer swore he felt himself ebbing impossibly deeper inside of you, reaching places he swore couldn’t be real. 

The gentle tapping of his blunt head against your cervix over and over again in a blissfully sluggish rhythm caused you to teeter closer and closer to your brink. 

Spencer held eye contact with you the whole time, laying perfectly still as he didn’t think his lungs could cope with any unnecessary movement. 

In truth his chest burned in agony with each aching intake of air but he didn’t care. All that mattered was the way you felt sheathed around him, rutting against him, clenching around him. 

By the time his second orgasm snuck up on him, pinching in the pit of his belly, he was light headed again but this time it was most certainly from lack of air. 

With a few more rocks of your pelvis you both came undone, reaching your peaks simultaneously. Spencer spilled his seed inside of you while your walls tightened around him, sending shockwaves through his entire body. 

You rode out your orgasms together but once you were starting to come down, you noticed the frantic heaving of Spencer’s chest and his slightly blue tinged lips. 

“Oh my gosh, Spence?” You threw yourself down to the bed, stroking his messy hair off his face. 

“I’m f-fine. S’fine.” He closed his eyes. 

“You're not fine!” You cried, gripping his face. 

“T-tired, okay? I’m s-sorry. Maybe…was a bit m-much. Worth it t-though. Okay. I’m o-okay…love y-you princess…”

You didn’t sleep. Not even a wink. You couldn’t tear your eyes away from him all night. You stared at his chest to make sure he was breathing and if you couldn’t see any movement you’d hold your hand above his mouth and nose until you felt his breaths against your skin. 

The fear and adrenaline coursed through you at the thought of his lungs collapsing because of his insistence to have you one last time. 

The flood of relief washed over you when he opened his eyes the next morning, smiling sleepily up at you through his lashes. 

“You scared me to death last night.” You spoke in hushed tones. 

“Hmm, sorry p-princess.” He panted, his hand rising to entwine in your hair and draw you in for a kiss. 

You cuddled for a while draped in that sleep addled bliss before you both became painfully aware that your time was almost up.

You helped him shower, massaging every inch of his body much like you had done all those months ago back in Bandera. It seemed like another lifetime ago now. 

Afterwards you dressed and you assisted him carrying his canister downstairs, feeling much like you were walking the plank. 

Luke and Grant were already up, the front door was open and Copper puttered about on the porch while Grant heaved his suitcase into Luke’s rental. 

Luke was in the doorway and he turned when he heard the two of you heading down the stairs. He smiled a little wistfully at you both and stepped back inside. 

“Guess this is goodbye.” Luke shrugged at Spencer, holding his arms open for the other man. 

Spencer practically fell into them, nuzzling against Luke’s strong chest while the older man tucked him in his arms as though he was made of glass. 

“Stay in touch this time, please?” Luke whispered into Spencer’s ear.

“Promise.” He replied. 

As they were pulling apart, Grant headed back in, Copper hot on his tail. He smiled softly at Spencer with a small nod of his head. 

“Ready to hit the road, stud?” Grant nudged Luke’s arm. 

“Yeah, I think so.” Luke turned his attention to you. 

There was an indescribable look in his eyes, his lip quivering ever so slightly at the corner as you prepared for what came next. 

“Well, uh, take care then guys.” He offered you both a wave, wrapping an arm around Grant’s shoulder and turning them both back to the open door. 

You stared at the back of his head while Spencer looked frantically between you and Luke. Your heart was rampantly thumping against your chest, confusion riddled in your bones. 

“What’s…what’s going on?” You croaked out. 

Luke and Grant slowly turned back around, a curious look on Luke’s features. You were too busy looking at Luke that you didn’t notice the smile on Grant’s face. 

“What do you mean?” Luke’s lips puckered, forehead creasing. 

“You…you’re supposed to be arresting me.” You swallowed around your dry tongue. 

Luke and Grant exchanged a look before Luke turned back to you with a small shrug. 

“As of last night I no longer work for the FBI. So I guess I can’t.” 

“What?” Spencer breathed. “What d-do you mean?” 

“It was time for a change. Think I might work at one of those rehab facilities for veterans. Maybe train service dogs like Roxy, who knows. Guess the world is my oyster.” He shrugged again.

“You…I don’t understand what’s happening.” Tears flooded your vision, your bottom lip quivering. “If you don’t arrest me, your old partner will still be looking for me. I don’t…I don’t understand.” 

“Don’t worry about it.” Luke’s lip twitched into a smirk. “I’ve got it covered. Just have a good life, okay? Both of you. Everyone deserves a second chance at happiness, god knows I got mine.” 

He glanced at Grant with a smile, entwining their fingers and giving his hand a small tug. 

“Shall we go, cariño?” 

“Please,” Grant replied.

You and Spencer watched them go in bewildered silence. You kept watching them until they were in Luke’s rental car, strapping themselves in and driving away down the gravel path. 

Finally you turned to Spencer, tears flowing heavily down both of your faces. It was hard to say which one of you crumbled first but suddenly you were in each other's arms, holding each other upright while you sobbed in the doorway of that old Victorian home. 

You had no way of knowing at the time, but four weeks later Spencer Reid would receive an email from someone called queenbabygirl72@prontonmail.com on his newly acquired laptop. The email would contain no message, simply three attachments. 

The first would be a death certificate promoting your name. The second, a birth certificate sporting your own date of birth alongside the name Elizabeth Reid. And the third would be a marriage licence declaring the union of the aforementioned Elizabeth Reid and Spencer Reid. 

And later when Spencer would call Luke and ask him about it, he would deny all knowledge of it. 

The two of you would make the decision to move away from Tombstone, as much as you loved the place, it wasn’t yours. You and Spencer’s fresh start would come in the form of Grant’s idea that he sell you and Spencer his old ranch. 

And so the two of you would live out your days back in Bandera on Grant’s family ranch, equipped with a summer house in which he and Luke would frequently vacation. Eventually you would acquire more horses and more cattle and even another dog to keep Copper company. 

But that was still all to come. 

For now, Spencer took hold of your hand and wheeling his canister in the other, the two of you headed down towards the stable, Copper running on ahead. You aided Spencer in mounting Willow, leaving his oxygen supplement behind and insisting he would be alright for a little trot down to the creek. You saddled up Rusty and with Copper still in toe, the five of you headed outside into the morning sunshine. 

Spencer reached over as the mares walked side by side and took hold of your hand, offering you a slightly wistful smile as he did so. There was no way of knowing how much time the two of you had left together, it was impossible to know how long Spencer had until his life was cut tragically short. 

But with any luck the two of you still had some wonderful years left ahead before you needed to worry about his diagnosis. And you would relish every single second of them. 

His hand squeezed yours tightly, his breathing a little heavy but he gave you a look that told you he was okay. The two horses took to the incline leading down through the trees towards the babbling brook beyond, Copper running happy little circles around Willow and Rusty.

You took in the beautiful morning, allowed yourself to relish in your own freedom for which you had been certain would end today. And you swore you would never take life granted again. 

You gently patted Rusty’s neck with your other hand, silently thanking her for knocking Spencer off of his horse all those months ago, for if she hadn’t the two of you would never have met.

It wouldn’t always be this way, there would still be some challenges along that broken road you travelled, but you would weather them together. Spencer still had a long way to go with his mental health and there would be blips, times in which the ghosts would rear their ugly heads and threaten to destroy everything he’d worked for. And of course understanding how to live with his illness would be a learning curve but he knew with you by his side, he could conquer anything. 

He brought your hand to his lips and kissed your knuckles as the five of you continued on your journey. You both still had a lot to learn, there would most certainly still be bumps in the road, but together the two of you could navigate just about any hurdle. 

And even if you couldn’t, it would still be okay. You were both still a little rusty, after all. 

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