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#in my defence how are you suppose to talk to anyone let alone a manager who you know nothing about and who hasnt talked to you first
parapsychoiogy · 2 months
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turns out the manager i was scared shitless hated me doesnt hate me im just an idiot who doesnt understand social interactions
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thenasoneshots · 3 months
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Aria Oneshot - Determination is a Key to Love
Requested?: No
Prompt: “I can’t believe I fell in love with you!”
Timing: Between Dual Destinies and Spirit of Justice (Cause I need Apollo in it.)
Type of oneshot: Angst/Fluff
Reader's Age: 18
Reader's Occupation: Defence Attorney
Reader's Relations: Sister to the WrightWorth kiddos (ie you are one too)
Warnings: None
Other notes: I should be writing actual AA oneshots, but I love my little kiddos so much and I want to use them.
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“Hold it! It seems the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Your Honour, the piece of evidence the defence has just presented is forged.”
I blinked, trying to calm my heart rate, I knew exactly what had happened to Dad when Aria’s father had brought up the fact that a piece of evidence he’d presented was forged, and it led to seven years of him not setting foot in a courtroom. That’s when I felt a hand on my shoulder, “(Y/n)?”
“J-Just leave me alone. I’m not going to fight it, Ally. I can’t prove it wasn’t,” I replied, trying to contain my tears as I removed my badge from my lapel, placing it on the bench in front of me before running out of the courtroom, hearing Ally chasing behind me, “(Y/n), wait!” I just ignored her, running back to the agency and curling up in a ball on one of the sofas.
“(Y/n)? (Y/n), what happened? Tell me.”
I just sobbed and clung onto my father as she ran over, giving me a hug, “Come on.”
“I-I don’t want to talk about it right now.”
“That’s alright, (Y/n). I’ll be here for you when you do want to explain.”
I took a deep breath and tried to calm my breathing, leaning on him, as I soon found myself falling asleep.
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I woke up later to voices, “What the HELL did you do?!”
“I-I..”
“You have no explanation, do you?! You’re a terrible friend, Aria!”
“I know, but please, let me apologise!”
“No,” I muttered, opening my eyes and sitting up, now realising that Trucy’s cape had been placed on top of me as a blanket, “You don’t deserve to be forgiven. I don’t care if you want to apologise, it WON’T GET ME MY BADGE BACK!” I shouted, the tears coming back to my eyes again, “I CAN’T BELIEVE I EVER FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU!” I slapped a hand across my mouth the minute I’d said the statement, and ran out of the Agency, leaving Aria and Luke shocked.
I didn’t know how long I had been running for, but I found myself by Gourd Lake. At least I knew where I was if anyone called me to ask where I’d gone. I just sat down by a tree and sighed, reprimanding myself for letting myself confess to Aria when I was supposed to be mad at her.
“(Y/n)? (Y/n) is that you?”
I looked up at the familiar voice and saw Gigi standing there, a pen in her hand. I just wiped my tears, “Oh. Hi. Yeah, I just needed some fresh air and my legs led me here. What brings you here?”
“Investigating a case. Bluford’s been assaulted and is now in the hospital, the rest of the team thinks he won’t make it, but the doctors are still hoping he will. He’s been smacked on the head by a blunt object, judging from the injury he had, and Caisie’s been accused of doing it. What’s worse is that there are witnesses! Oops… I shouldn’t be telling you all this, you might end up defending her.”
“Just stop. I’m just going to come out and say it, I lost my badge, so it doesn’t matter, Gi, I can’t defend her anyway, but I don’t really want to go into detail.”
“Oh my science, that’s not good. If you need someone to talk to, I’m here!”
“Thanks.”
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“Wait… then who got (Y/n)? Everyone else got a gift… On no, did your name get lost in my hat?” Ally muttered, taking her hat off her head and tapping the top of it, trying to see if there was anything stuck inside.
“I’m sure that’s not the case, Ally. In fact, I do actually know where your Secret Santa is, (Y/n).”
“It’s fine. I don’t need anything anyway. Unless you’ve managed to get my badge back, Dad.”
Before he could reply, a knock was heard at the door to the agency. Dad smiled and walked over, opening the door. I couldn’t tell who it was unless I felt a tap on my shoulder, “(Y/n)?”
I tried to contain my anger at the blonde as I looked up at Aria, “What?”
“Sorry I’m late, it took longer than I expected to get your gift.”
I blinked a few times in confusion before she handed me a small box. I took in hesitantly, seeing a smile on her face. I returned my attention to the box and opened it up, gasping as I saw the small golden circular badge inside, “I-Is this a joke?” I asked, looking Aria in the eye as she chuckled, “It’s serious. I’m sorry for causing you to lose your badge, (Y/n),” she spoke, taking it out of the box, “May I?” I nodded and she came closer, pinning it back to my lapel, “That’s where it belongs, not sitting on the defence bench where you left it.”
“H-how did you get it back for me though? It must have been incredibly hard seeing as by taking it off myself and walking out of the courtroom, I was basically admitting that I knew it was forged.”
“Well, I did have a bit of help,” she replied, smiling up at Dad, causing me to smile in return as I hugged her, “Best Christmas gift ever!”
“Does this mean I’m forgiven?”
“I’m still mad at you for getting my badge taken away from me in the first place, but you got it back for me, so yes.”
“That makes me happy to hear. Now, about your confession…” Instead of finishing her sentence, she took my cheek in her hand and kissed me. My eyes went wide and I blinked, but wrapped my arms around her in response.
“Correction to my earlier statement; That was the best Christmas present ever.”
“Glad you think so, (Y/n). Glad you think so.”
----------------------------END OF ONESHOT
Hehe…
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ty-does-blogs · 4 days
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A sore subjcect
Summary: It had only been about half a month since the team managed to get both harry's daughter jessy and their friend Rory back from zoom. But they all could tell the that something had changed in them, as well as their relationship with harry.
final word count: 867
Note: This wasn't supposed to be more than one part but here we are, now three parts involved
Part 1, Part 2 , Part 3
trigger warnings: Mention of kidnapping and mental abuse, and addiction talk. Please read at your own risk
The two speeders skidded to a stop in the cortex." Whats up?" Rory asked placing their hair in a messy ponytail with a clip." We wanted to walk with you rory." Caitlin said standing up from her chair as harry walked into the cortex followed by iris and joe. Barry nodded his head and slightly leaned against line of the desks." Talk about what? Guys im fine." Rory said in a slightly defence tone. They didnt mean for it to be that way, but trying to force them to talk wasn't going to help." Come on dude, we all can see how zoom messed with you. Just wanna make sure your okay." Cisco said holding his hands above his head in defence.
Rory rolled their eyes in annoyance." I said i was fine, i dont need to talk about what happened with zoom." They said again. The team could tell it wasn't working, barry moved his hand over his face before looking to harry for an idea. Harry let out a soft sigh before walking closer." Ro, talk. You know im the last person to know anything about feelings. But i know this is hurting you." He said reaching to take their hand. Rory scoffed and pulled back." Okay, you know what. You wanna know how zoom tormented me saying that no one cared?" They said sighing, one hand moving over brush over their face." How he constantly reminded me i wasn't fast enough to save any person i care about?" Rory said moving further way from the group as the memories of begging with zoom seem to flash right behind their eyes. Harry's hand want to try and touch ro's shoulder but they jolted back." I told you i was fine." Was the last thing anyone herd before their silver lighting flashed through the cortex and out of S.T.A.R. Labs before anyone else could stop them. The team blinked in confusion at what happened, they wanted to help but it seemed it had the opposite effect.
The decision to look for rory was one the team didn't have to make, they wanted to give them space. But they had to make sure rory was okay." i found them, jitters." harry said into the phone as the team had let out a collective sigh. Harry watched as rory thanked the person and dashed out the other side." Now where did they go?" Cisco asked looking at the monitor." Maybe to be alone?" Jessy said walking into the cortex. The team looked to see her and nodded." Does anyone know where that would be?" Barry asked as they noticed, that no one knew them. Yes, rory had kinda grew up with the pair. But there was always a wall between them and the team." I know. Harry said before breaching to star labs, then to them.
Rory skidded to stop, finished the coffee and walking closer to the cliff face. This was their quite spot, one where all the cares and faults of the world didn't matter. One where rory could think. A sigh left their throat as a familiar square box was pulled from their black leather jacket. A small laugh left rory's lips as they reached for one of the many cigarettes in the box, lighting it up and taking along drag." Well this is a sight i thought i've never see." A familiar voice said, rory closed their eyes tightly." Your not real zoom, Your made up by my head." Rory mumbled to themself before taking another long drag." that maybe be so, but im just as real as you make me Addict." The figure taunted. Rory took a deep breath in counting to ten before looking back over the city scape. Taking in another drag rory sighed. They had been clean but all this zoom stuff made them pick back up the habit." So that what you decided to do?" A new voice asked as rory's shoulder tightened." What harry?" They asked in a defeated voice, now wasn't the time they wanted to talk." Look, im sorry about the cortex. but im serious about making sure your better." He started and reached over placing a warm hand on rory's shoulder." I should be fine, honest harry." Rory said looking over, the city lights reflected tear stained tracks that fell down their face." You know im an addict?" Rory asked looking back over the city and light another cigarette taking a long pull from it. Harry shook his head." I mean i've seen the coin you carry in your wallet, but i didn't want ask until you told me." he said standing next to them on against the railing. Rory sighed and placed the cigarette in between her mouth before pulling the coin out." This is what showed almost four years of being clean." She said and lowered her head." why don't you breach the team here and i can talk about it." Rory said with a small sad smile, lifting their head to look at harry's blue eyes. He nodded with a smile back and walked off to breach the team here as rory prepared to finally let team flash in.
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casspurrjoybell-19 · 19 days
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Does it Matter? - Chapter 27 - Part 1
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*Warning: Adult Content*
Dara might have stayed drifting just below consciousness for hours on end but hunger and thirst drove him to push through the haze.
He made an involuntary sound of startle like, as he finally found himself in the waking world again.  
His whole body felt exhausted and ache but he wasn't in any real pain.
He could hear talking but he wasn't awake enough to make sense of the words just yet.
Hands gingerly pulled him up and he was propped upright against someone else's body.
A cup of water was pressed against his lips and slowly tilted as he drank.
He was awake enough now to know that the person he was leaning against was Maric.
He still didn't have the energy to process words but the gentle resonance of Maric's voice when he set aside formalities and defences was familiar.
Dara almost didn't want to get better.
He couldn't remember everything that had happened recently just then but he knew things hadn't been like this anymore but he was hungry, starving and he could only delay so long.
He was already starting to wake up properly and remember, already starting to process snippets of the conversation happening around him.
Mathers was also in the room.
"Food," Dara murmured.
Maric stroked a hand over the top of Dara's hair.
"You want food? What would you like?"
"No, I... Okay, we'll get you food."
"I'll go get him something," Mathers offered.
Maric must have nodded or given some other non-verbal sign of approval because a few moments later Dara heard the door open and shut and they were alone.
"How are you feeling?" Maric asked.
"Tired."
"Do you want me to lay you back down?"
Dara made a sound that was half groan, half whine in the back of his throat.
He didn't have the words to verbalise that no, he very much did not want Maric to lay him back down.
This might be the last time Maric ever held him and he wasn't about to let go of it so easily.
"Okay," Maric said and he didn't move, so Dara assumed he understood.
Dara remembered what had happened now.
He remembered everything.
He remembered Maric finding out what he was.
He remembered the rejection afterwards.
He remembered arriving here, in the city of Givanon and he remembered being left alone in his room while Maric and his men went to the party and he remembered falling, he remembered being pushed.
"The slave," Dara murmured.
"He pushed me."
"Which slave?"
"The big one."
"Fraccus? Lord Nolen's slave?"
Dara nodded against Maric's chest.
"Did he say anything?"
Dara shook his head.
"Nothing at all? Are you're sure?"
Maric sighed.
"We thought that was probably the case."
With a bit of effort and confused assistance from Maric, Dara managed to turn so that the side of his head was resting against Maric's chest and he was curled into his lap.
"Did Lord Nolen tell him to do it?"
"We think so but we can't prove it."
Maric sighed and rested his hand on Dara's upper arm.
"And that's the issue. If he were almost anyone else I could have him punished, even executed, if I wanted to but with his status it's hard to take any action without solid proof against him."
"Maric..."
"Hmm?"
"You should have proof before you punish people. Even the not important ones."
"Well, I... yes, I suppose. I am reasonably sure he was involved, though."
"Please don't execute anyone for me."
"Ah. I was sort of planning to. In regards to those guards."
Dara was silent for a long moment.
"Okay but I don't want to watch."
"You're okay with me having them executed?"
"Hmm, the ones you had whipped, only them."
Maric shifted his arm so that it was secured more snuggly around Dara.
"Okay."
"Is this the only way to get your attention now? Almost dying?"
"Do you want my attention?"
"Obviously."
"Well, it's not so obvious to me what your desires or motivations are anymore. I have no way of knowing what you did because you wanted to and what you did as a means to survive."
"Hmm..."
"Hmm?"
Dara pushed away from Maric so that he was sitting on his own, more or less.
He had one hand on Maric's shoulder to steady himself and the spinning in his head threatened to knock him down but he managed to stay upright with only a slight wobble.
"You could ask me."
Maric opened his mouth like he was about to defend himself but what ended up coming out was a reluctant....
"Yes but I was scared."
"Scared?"
"You lied to me. I don't blame you for it but it hurt. Please take this as a compliment, Dara... when I say that you have become my greatest point of weakness."
"Is that why you don't want to be around me anymore?"
Maric groaned.
"No, I... yes but no, I do want you around but this situation is a complicated one and my feelings are all mixed up in it."
"Well, so are mine. I have feelings, too."
Maric's features softened.
"I know, Dara. I'm sorry."
Dara sank back against Maric's chest.
"It's okay. I'm not really angry, just sad."
Maric wrapped his arms around Dara.
"What do you want?"
Dara wanted many things, he wanted to stay in Maric's arms forever, he wanted to eat an entire plump, roast chicken.
"I want to be a person."
"You are a person."
"No, I'm a healer now, even if I can't heal anyone ever again."
"It's a highly respected position. Nobody will dare mistreat you."
"Somebody threw me out of a window," Dara mused.
"Well... yes but I bet he wouldn't have if he'd known."
"No, I know. I just thought it was funny, maybe it's not."
"I didn't find it very funny."
"Got your attention, though," Dara murmured.
"Is there a less painful way to do that?"
"What do you want?" Maric asked again.
"From me, specifically."
"It's the same answer, followed by a more detailed list of specifics but I am still a slave, maybe being a person is an unreasonable request."
"Slaves are people."
"Most people don't think so."
Maric's hand stroked up and down Dara's arm.
"When you're not a slave it's very easy not to think so or not to think of it much at all. If you're wealthy, you benefit and if you're poor, well, at least you're not a slave. You have someone beneath you. Maybe it's easier for me because I don't need slaves to have people serve me or to have people who are, at least in terms of status, beneath me."
"Hmm," Dara said.
"Lord Nolen's other slave, Bug, has been helping us. He told us you'd been hurt. He has visions of the future, so he knew what had happened."
"Where is he?"
"With Brayan. I think the experience has shifted Brayan's perspective somewhat. He seems genuinely concerned for Bug."
"Can you help him?"
Maric let out a long sigh.
"I'd like to but what can I do? We already discussed what I can and can't do and what I should and shouldn't do without proof."
"You know he abuses his slave. You have proof of that."
"That is not a crime, unfortunately but even if I could get away with taking this one man's slave, that would not be a real solution to this problem. There were people at the party last night with child slaves who were likely being abused just as badly, my own father..." Maric took a deep breath in and shook his head.
"Seeing these things and not doing anything isn't easy but if I take action against each case individually I burn huge amounts of good will to help just one person and that's not to say that one person isn't important but is that the best choice if it means it will be more difficult to make bigger changes later on?"
Dara curled in deeper under Maric's arm.
"It feels bad. To know what that's like and do nothing and to have things better now, to be safe and to still just feel... angry."
He took a breath in, let it out and reluctantly added...
"Neglected."
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The Date - Azula x female reader series part 2 : The bonfire in Shu Jing
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After your incredibly successful first date you and Azula head to the town of Shu Jing for the bonfire date you have planned. However Azula also has some expectations of her own which could make everything go up in flames. 
Part one here
Part three here
____
The next morning you woke up with a smile on your face before you even remembered the date. When you recalled the details about why you were so happy you sunk back into bed and smiled closing your eyes. You could see Azula’s smile in your mind and it filled you with an infectious warmth. You shot out of bed anxious to start the day and found Mai and Ty lee downstairs. From the way Ty lee’s knee was shaking with excitement you knew Mai had told her about the date. Deciding to tease her you smirked and headed for the door “no time to chat gotta go!”. Ty lee let out a small gasp “wait but...” when she realised your hand was on the door handle but you made no move to open in. You grinned at her and stepped away from the door. “Ty lee you’re the biggest gossip in the fire nation, I know why you’re here”. Ty lee blushed “I was just intrigued about your date! I had no idea it was even happening and then Mai told me it went really well?”. You nodded “it did, I think Azula felt comfortable around me and had a good time. I enjoyed being around her informally and i’m really looking forward to the next one”. “Next one?!?” Ty lee cried and you nodded “yeah we’re going to Shu Jing for the festival next week”. “Wow” Ty lee replied and you sunk into a chair and grabbed some food. “So...what was she like?” Ty lee asked. When you shot her a quizzical look she looked down “just I can’t imagine Azula ever going on a date, she’s so... independent and guarded”. You nodded “she was a bit nervous at first but I made sure to choose things I thought she would enjoy and always reassure her she could leave anytime we wanted to. I think that helped and she let her walls down”. Ty lee smiled “that’s so sweet y/n”. “Yeah who knew you could be romantic” Mai teased and you pushed her playfully. “So are you going to see Azula before the date?”. You shook your head “our princess is a busy girl so I’m not going to bother her or come on too strong. I think she’ll appreciate not being smothered so I figured I’d just see her this afternoon for our regular sparring session and keep it casual”. Mai nodded “that makes sense, you don’t want to overwhelm her, this being her first relationship and all”. You nodded “exactly” but Ty lee didn’t agree “well I can’t play it cool! I’ve got to see her” and with that she rushed from the room.
You did all of your morning tasks and made your way to the palace as the midday sun shone overhead as usual. You were let into the palace as the guards recognised you and took the familiar route to the royal training rooms. You passed through the gardens for a change and paused to see how beautiful it looked. You looked at the plants and stopped by some vivid red roses. An idea hit you and smiling, you quickly cut one loose and hurried away. As you approached your regular training room you heard voices and recognised them as Ty lee and Azula. You heard your name and figured this was the first time Ty lee had managed to get Azula to talk. “So how did it go?” Ty lee asked. You bet Azula was wreathing in awkwardness at having to answer that and smiled fondly. “It was...good” Azula said after a while and Ty lee squealed. “I’m so pleased you’ve finally found someone! We all thought you were going to be alone forever...all things considered”. You frowned at that comment and from Azula’s sharp reply knew the feeling was mutual. “What is that supposed to mean?”. “Nothing!” Ty lee said quickly on the defence “just you’ve never dated anyone while Mai, Y/n and I all have. I just wondered if you ever would but you’ve done it now, you’re on the board so it’s okay! You’ve caught up!” Ty lee explained in an attempt to comfort Azula. It didn’t work. “I don’t think my whole life is solved because I went on a date Ty lee, now if you’re done I have sparring to do”. Ty lee babbled “no of course not I just meant...”. “Goodbye Ty lee” Azula replied and you winced. “Goodbye princess” Ty lee replied and she hurried from the room so fast she didn’t even notice you. You gave Azula a few minutes to recover and entered the room. “Hey” you smiled and held out the rose you’d taken from the garden “this is for you”. Azula blushed and eyed the red rose “thank you” she said taking it from you lightly. “So would you like to get started?” you asked aware Azula was probably a bit shaken from her conversation and the princess nodded eagerly.
Luckily once Azula had hit some things she felt better and as training went on you saw her smile return. At the end of the session Azula seemed back to normal and she traded jokes and quips with you as you packed away. Azula picked up the rose before smiling “did you steal this from the palace gardens by any chance?”. You paused “well...possibly” and she laughed. “See I wanted to get you something but I wasn’t sure what. I was passing through the gardens and saw this rose and it made me think of you so I swiped it and hurried here. Think i’ll get in trouble?”. Azula smiled “no I imagine not. The gardens are the property of the royal family so really this is my flower anyway. You effectively stole my property and gave it back to me”. You shrugged “well in that case you’re welcome”. Azula chuckled shaking her head as she watched you “you are an odd one y/n”. You smiled “I think you’re pretty special too princess” you replied and Azula blushed shooting her eyes away from yours rapidly. You grinned and began contemplating if flustered Azula was your favourite Azula when you realised you’d reached the path where you parted ways. “I’ll be heading this way now” you explained “have a nice evening and i’ll see you tomorrow”. Azula nodded “goodbye y/n” and walked away toying with the rose.
Your sparring sessions were largely the same as usual and the week flew by. Before you knew it Friday morning was here and you headed to Azula’s apartment a big bouquet in hand. You decided to give her an actual arrangement that wasn’t stolen from her garden and made sure to fill it with lots of red and yellow flowers which you knew were Azula’s favourite colours. You reached Azula’s room to find her outside ordering the servants to carry her things carefully. She had a lot of stuff. “Someone’s not a light packer” you called and Azula spun to face you. Her eyes went to the flowers immediately and you saw she looked shocked. “A princess must have options” she replied “I take it these are for me?” she asked pointing to the bouquet. You nodded “they are and I didn’t steal them this time”. Azula smiled and took them from you “they’re very beautiful...I like the colours”. “I thought you would, red and yellow” you smiled and Azula blushed “yes..give me a few minutes to put them in a vase. I don’t want to take them with me and have a clumsy servant crush them”. “Understandable” you nodded “I’ll help take your small army of luggage to the carriage” shooting her a playful smile. Minutes later Azula joined you by the carriage and clasped her hands awkwardly “I’m ready to leave”. “Then let’s go!” you cried and opened the carriage door.
The trip wasn’t long but you spent the time explaining to Azula all the different attractions and working out what you’d both like to do. Again Azula seemed nervous initially and then relaxed the more time she spent with you. When you arrived at your lodgings and extended a hand to help her out of the carriage she took it and you struggled not to smile. You quickly unpacked and rushed to the festival which was in full swing. Azula had a few guards with her but luckily given both of your advanced fire bending skills they stayed to the perimeter leaving the two of you alone. You knew Azula hadn’t been out of the palace much and certainly never for fun and watched as she looked at all the stalls with curiosity. You smiled and looked at the ferris wheel “how about we do that first? It’ll give us a good view to scout the place and work out what looks best”. Azula smirked “are you really using battle strategies here? Get the high ground and survey your surroundings?”. You grinned “don’t pretend you weren’t thinking of it” and led her to the large wheel.
After the ride Azula decided she would like to try some of the games. Of course she was amazing at all of them. She beat you in the ring toss, darts and whack a badgermole easily. There was also a High Striker game where people stuck a podium with a hammer in the hopes of ringing a bell at the top with their strength. You saw Azula watching the people try and got the sudden urge to show off. “What prize do you want?” you asked and Azula paused “prize?”. You nodded “if you ring the bell at the top you get one of the prizes” you explained pointing to the nearby booth “so what prize would you like me to win you?”. Azula turned to you smirking “you assume you can win?”. “I know I can” you replied and Azula smiled at your confidence “go on then”. You nodded and made your way forward. You watched a man before you pick up the heaviest hammer they had and perform a large swing smashing the podium precariously. The sensor rose but didn’t hit the bell. “Better luck next time” the worker called and the man walked away grumbling. You stepped forwards and smiled “I’d like a go please”. The man nodded “of course, a strong girl like you should have no problem! Choose any tool you’d like”. You eyed the hammers and smiled. Most people chose the heaviest one thinking that was how to win, they were mistaken. You chose a medium-sized hammer that was heavy enough to have weight but not too clunky. You toyed with it in your hand before nodding. You took a stance and looked back over your shoulder. You saw Azula watching and winked making her blush. You turned back to the machine and swung the hammer over your head and down flat onto the podium. You used power but made sure to employ enough control that you hit the podium correctly and evenly. The sensor shot up and rang the bell. Lights lit up the machine and people nearby stopped to look. You turned around smugly and saw Azula laughing shaking her head. The worker looked at you shocked and you smiled handing him back the hammer “brains as well as brawn” you explained. He passed you your winning ticket and you made your way back to Azula “I believe I promised you this?”. Azula took it smiling “you did...you seem to be good at keeping your promises”. You nodded “I am, now let’s go choose your prize”.  
The prize booth was filled with lots of soft plush animals and toys. You looked over the options wondering what Azula would choose. You inspected some of the weapons they had as adult prizes and figured that would be her pick. Instead Azula handed her ticket over and requested a large sabretooth moose lion plushy. You stared at her in shock and Azula shrugged “what? I can get any of these weapons or tacky decorations with a click of my fingers, the only thing I haven’t seen before is this” she said shifting it in her arms. You laughed shaking your head “you’re full of surprises, just when I think I have you pegged you make me realise how foolish an idea that is”. Azula nodded her head “and don’t you forget it”. 
The main event of the night arrived and you and Azula gathered by the huge firepit to see it be lit on fire. You held Azula’s sabre-tooth moose lion plushy so she had an unobstructed view and watched in anticipation as a group of five approached from alternating angles. As the host thanked everyone for coming Azula chuckled watching the preparations. “They’re using oil” she said leaning into you “me and you could light that thing easily”. You nodded “we could but not everyone is like us Princess”. Azula nodded “indeed” and her eyes swept over you briefly before she turned her attention back to the firepit. Finally the host called for the pit to be lit and everyone began counting down. Azula rolled her eyes as adults and children alike began chanting but you poked her with your elbow and she joined in too. The firepit was set alight and everyone gaped as the fire spread rapidly and shone brightly. You glanced at Azula and smiled seeing her mouth open in awe. The fire lit up her face and made her yellow eyes even brighter. You grinned seeing her so excited and took her hand. Azula was momentarily shaken out of her daze at the sensation and glanced down at your hands. You offered her a bright smile which she tentatively returned. Azula kept ahold of your hand and continued watching the firepit.
Eventually the rides and games started again and you and Azula headed away from the bonfire. “So what would you like to do next?” you asked “I’ve heard the maze trail in the forest is good”. Azula pursed her lips “perhaps...but could we return to the suite first? It’s getting cold and i’d like to grab a jacket”. You didn’t think it was cold at all, especially with the bonfire but it would be a good place to store the huge plushy Azula chose so you agreed. You quickly made your way back to your lodgings and followed Azula inside. You were both waved inside by guards and Azula headed straight to her bedroom. “It’ll be in my room” she explained beckoning you to follow. Azula held the door open for you and you walked inside and began looking around for Azula’s jacket. You heard the door close and turned confused when Azula grabbed you. She gripped your arm and spun you around before kissing you. You jumped but soon smiled "are you ambushing me?". Azula grinned "maybe" and carried on kissing you. Your smile grew and you kissed her back. Azula was very clearly new to this but had a lot of enthusiasm. She was grabbing you very tightly, her hands wandering curiously, and you were surprised considering this was the first time she’d likely kissed anyone. As Azula began to tug you further into the room you paused. Azula seemed to be in a rush and her destination in the room was blatantly obvious which didn’t make sense to you. The fire nation was known for being cautious, they were never ones to jump into things given their honour and customs but Azula was definitely trying to escalate things. You broke the kiss Azula looked up at you "what? Don’t you want me?". You blushed and shook your head "that's not it, just...Azula are you sure you want to...so soon?". Azula smirked "and here I thought you had a reputation for leading girls into your bed". You paused "I'm not a prude but I...this is the first time we've even kissed and you want to go even further?". Azula swallowed "well why not? We would have at some stage so why not just get it over with". Then it dawned on you. Azula was trying to catch up. The comments Ty lee had made were still bothering her. This was Azula’s way of ticking some boxes and matching all of you. You understood Azula’s desire to do this came from an insecurity and felt sympathy rush through you for the princess. "Azula I don’t just want to get this over with you...I want it to be a big lead up. I want it to be perfect and spontaneous, when the time is right. You can’t just force these things". Azula sighed clearly annoyed and stepped away from you sharply. "You can leave" she said and you groaned "Azula...". "Get out!” she yelled her voice rising in volume “if you're not attracted to me then leave". You shook your head "Azula attraction is not the problem...trust me this is taking a lot of restraint but I respect you enough to do it". Azula rolled her eyes "y/n I've heard the stories, you don’t even know some of the girl’s names before you proceed with them so clearly the problem is me". You shook your head "not at all but you're right that you're what's different from those situations! Azula the girls I have one night stands with...I do that because I'm only attracted to them. All I feel is physical attraction, with you it's so much more than just physical. There’s also the strong emotional connection from our years of friendship and the incomparable romantic feelings I feel for you. So I don’t want it to just be physical between us....I like you Azula and I know this is strong for a second date but I want to date you. Long term. I want to see you lots more and so I don’t want to rush things. You're too good to hurry through things with...if you’d let me, I'd like us to take our time so I can savour this when the time comes. I want to appreciate you in every single way and immerse myself in this" you said taking her hand "you're not a girl I just want to spend one night with Azula". Azula blushed and looked down. "So If it's okay with you, I'd like to keep dating you". Azula nodded her head "okay". You smiled "really?". She nodded "yes that all sounded...really nice but honestly I'm tired and rather embarrassed so I think I will retire for the night now". You nodded your head "I understand i’ll leave you alone but you have nothing to be embarrassed about. You're a wonderful kisser Azula and I find you very attractive. I just know you're worth the wait, I'll prove it to you soon enough". Azula blushed and you smiled kissing her hand "goodnight princess Azula" and left the room. 
You returned to your own room across the hall and had a nervous sleep. You were worried Azula would grow angry again when she was left with her own thoughts but when you saw her the next morning she blushed bashfully and smiled. You grinned pleased she’d listened to you and worked on being extra attentive to her.
After breakfast you had some time before you were set to depart and so you invited Azula to walk through the forest with you. The decorations from yesterday were still there and it was a beautiful autumn morning so you wandered amongst the trees in a content silence. However the peace was soon broken by a rain shower and you thanked your foresight for bringing an umbrella. You held it over the two of you and Azula wrapped her arm around you pressing close. You smiled and led her to a covered area. Once safe you took the umbrella down and smiled at her. "Sorry I heard it was forecast to rain but I thought we would miss it”. Azula smiled back "it’s fine, I know this might be odd for a fire bender to say but i find it rather nice". You looked around the park and had to agree, the water made all the colours come to life and gave the air a much-needed freshening after all of yesterday’s fire. "It is beautiful” you told Azula and she blushed looking down. "I'm glad you asked to get away” Azula told you “I wanted to thank you. You were right, last night I was trying to hurry things because I was insecure and i...thank you for stopping things rather than taking advantage of me. I would have regretted it and i know I'm not the easiest person to say no to so thank you for rejecting me and not letting me do that". You smiled gently touching her cheek "I didn’t reject you I just asked to wait and you said yes. Simple as that. You don’t have to thank me, I did what I did, not just for myself, but because i’d never make you do anything you don’t want to do. I care and respect you Azula...you never have to thank me for doing that, it's what you deserve". Azula blushed and looked up at you "well either way I'm grateful and want to express that to you...." Azula glanced at your lips and smiled. Azula leant in hesitantly and you met her halfway. You kissed her softly and caressed her cheek with one hand. Azula snaked her arms around your neck and comfortably settled against you. Last night Azula had been rash and anxious. This in comparison was calm and relaxed. You pulled back and Azula blinked her eyes open not moving away from you. "Last night was nice but this..." Azula started and you smiled "i know, you really are spectacular". Azula blushed and you chuckled "we should be heading back to pack". Azula nodded her head and took your hand "let's go". She didn’t drop it the whole way back. 
That afternoon, back home in the capital, you stumbled into your shared house with a wide smile on your face and Mai sighed. “Don’t tell me...it was amazing?” she asked sarcastically. "It was amazing" you grinned before frowning "but I can’t tell you about it!". Mai returned your frown "what why not?". "Because last time you told Ty lee who then made some comments which upset Azula and so I'm stopping the chain of command". Mai blinked "y/n I'm sorry I had no idea Ty lee...if you tell me I promise not to tell her. You hesitated and Mai sighed "please!!!! Honestly now I'm dying to know what's got you so happy". You sighed "fine but only because I'm bursting to tell someone! So the whole first day was lovely. Azula and I spent time together, i won her a prize, she beat me in everything and it was all very sweet". Mai raised an eyebrow not impressed and you smirked. "Then Azula gets cold so we go back for her jacket and she starts kissing me". Mai blinked "wow that was fast!". "I know right? And then she starts advancing it, grabbing me, leading me to her bed...". "Eugh gross no detailed account of the sex you had" Mai groaned and you rolled your eyes. "That's the thing, we didn’t! I called it off". Mai laughed "sure you did". "I did!" you cried and Mai rolled her eyes "I don’t believe you mainly for the fact you're still alive". You smiled "Azula was angry at first but I understood when I probed her that she was only acting like that because of what Ty lee had said. She felt like she had to hurry and catch up with us to be valid, she felt inferior. So I told her I wanted to wait and date her properly and build up to it and she agreed". Mai blinked "I still don’t see how she didn’t set you on fire...what did you say?". "Well I told her how I cared about her, how she didn’t have to do anything she didn’t want to just to fit the stereotypical relationship template and a lot of stuff for her ears only but basically we’re dating". Mai nodded her head "I'm impressed, two dates and Azula agreed to date you?". You nodded your head "we went for a lovely walk the next morning and had a do-over first kiss, it was wonderful and so is she". Mai paused "you always fall for girls fast but this is a new record". "Well I guess it makes sense, Azula is pretty unique. The firebending prodigy princess...anyone would fall for her and i’m not ashamed to admit I have" you smiled. Mai smirked shaking her head "you never did like making things easy for yourself did you? Falling for Azula of all people?”. You blushed but just laughed “the heart wants what the heart wants and I’m not going to mess this up. I'm going to treat Azua to all the romantic tricks I know!" and with that you rushed away to begin planning your future dates.
___
I think in any relationship Azula would just be a bundle of insecurities and would need a lot of reassurance from her partner to overcome that. 
I’m planning on doing one more maybe two more parts and in the next one i’m going to have Ozai ruin everything because that’s what he does best 
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creweemmaeec11 · 3 years
Text
My favourite prompts:
A list of my favourite prompts that I’ve posted in the past, all curated into a huge list just for you guys!
1
Finally, the day has come. The villain is thought to be dead. The hero has won.
Until suddenly the hero learns the villain left them EVERYTHING in their will. Made them the owner and operator of all their illegal business.
Obviously, the hero plans to shut everything down immediately. But they quickly realize just how many people the villain employed… how many family’s they fed…
2
“You kissed me,”
“I did… and?”
“What-!? What do you mean and!?,”
“What more do you want?”
“An explanation would be a good start!”
“…or I could just do it again…”
*other person turns bright red,*
“Or… or that, I suppose,”
3
“What the hell are you doing here!?”
“I think the better question would be what in the hell are you wearing,” the villain replied, amusement clear on their face, like they were struggling to keep from laughing.
“What- it’s-” the hero blushed, remembering what they were wearing, “their pajamas! What are you-!”
“Oh my god…” the villain replied, like they were struggling to come to terms with what they were seeing, “the hero of the city not only own, but wears a onesie,”
“Excuse me!” The hero snapped in defence, “They’re comfortable!”
“They? You have more??”
4
“I gotta say hero,” The villain mused as they casually moved toward the cell bars, “I’ve been called many things in my life: monster, villain, outcast, loser, scoundrel,” they tilted their head, examining the hero before them, “but ‘our last hope?’” *clicks tongue* “that’s a first,”
5
You live in a world where anyone born with superpowers must become a super hero. It doesn’t matter what the power is, or how small it is, it is mandatory. It was deemed that having anyone with superpowers work alongside regular people was “unsafe” and “unfair.” Every year, dozens of superhero’s with powers useless for fighting are killed. You’ve managed to make it this long with nobody finding out you have a superpower. But how much longer can you hide in plain sight?
6
The city’s villain mysteriously disappears and hasnt been seen in a week. The people are celebrating, but the hero is worried. What if the villain is planning something big? Determined to stop whatever evil plan is brewing, the hero tracks the villain down, but they dont find what they expected. Instead of evil plotting, the villain:
-Has been taking care of a sick pet -Come down with the flu -Been helping arrange a friends wedding -Found out they were pregnant -Is getting married themselves -Mourning the death of a loved one -Has adopted a young pet and been occupied taking care of them -Has been helping one of their lackeys who’s in a desperate situation -Has been feeding the homeless and offering blankets
7
You’re the most wanted villain by all highest ranking authorities, but all the heros “just can’t seem to catch you” (they always let you get away) because all your crimes are things like stealing expensive medication and then donating it to hospitals, robbing toy stores and donating to orphanages, robbing banks and giving to charity, robbing grocery stores and feeding the homeless, ect
8
A hero/villain with the power to materialize their own tattoos. Got a wrench tattoo? Now you’ve got a wrench. Got a tattoo of wings? A bomb? A get away car? Well…
Dragon tattoos have always been popular, havent they?
9
Write about a genius inventor villain who, while watching the news, learns about a sick child in hospital doctors arnt sure they can cure. The villain realizes something theyve invented could cure the child. Now the hard part is convincing them to let the villain help.
10
The villain starts to notice the hero is feeling more down the usual, so they start leaving the hero little notes to cheer them up. All is going well until the hero figures out who is sending them.
11
In a world of magic users where everyone is divided into the 6 eye colours, and the colour of your eyes represents what your powers are. Each colour has an elemental power, can talk to a certain type of creature(Invertebrates, fish, amphibians, reptiles, birds, mammals), and has 3 other powers. For example, blue eyes control water, can commune with fish, etc. Everyone in the world has either red, orange, yellow, green, blue or purple eyes. Except for you, you were born with black eyes. Everyone is afraid of what your powers will be, but they should be more worried about the kind of creatures you can talk to…
12
A hero and a villain (and maybe their sidekicks, up to you) trapped in a haunted house or haunted location.  
-One is scared so the other comforts them. They are both scared but trying to act like they aren’t. -One doesn’t believe in ghosts, and the other has the power to communicate with them or see them. -Ghosts aren’t real, but one continues to try and freak the other out, who claims they aren’t scared. -Ghost wingman. I need’ d say no more -One gets possessed, so the other has to do the whole ‘kiss to break a curse’ thing to bring them out of it. -The classic Person A thinks ghosts aren’t real so they prank Person B to scare them. Then shit gets real, but person B doesn’t believe person A, thinking its just another prank.
13
“I trusted you! You promised!”
“I kept my promise! I got you your results! Don’t question my methods from a top that high moral horse or yours, especially when the only reason you made a deal with me in the first place was because you were too much of a coward to do what needed to be done!”
14
The local wildfire has been growing out of control, forcing the city to have to evacuate. Suddenly, the villain with water powers shows up to lend a hand to fire fighters.
15
“Tell me hero,” the villain spoke, chains jangling from where they hung on the villains wrists as they walked up to the bars of the jail cell, “If you wanted to skip a press conference, could you?”
“Excuse me?”
“You’re sisters getting married, but your needed for a big event at the hero academy that day. Would you be allowed to attend the wedding? What about if your brother stole a pack of gum. Could you let it slide? Not would you, but could you?”
The hero paused. Could they? They had responsibilities! They had commitments to the city, and to the serving of justice!
The villain laughed at the heros silence, “I may be in jail, but you’re more chained then I’ll ever be,”
16
“So tell me,” the villain drawled, dragging a finger across the heros skin, making them shiver, “what changed your mind?”
17
Hero discovers the villain has a day job. It isnt at all what they expected. (Day care, animal shelter, etc)
18
“What are you going to do if you beat me, and suddenly the city dosent need a hero? What are you going to do if you get hurt and can no longer fight, and the city forgets about you just like all the heros before you? Who will you be when your legacy crumbles under the weight of all those who follow? Will you take up knitting?”
The hero stared unblinking and frozen as the villain took a step forward.
“Sure, your a hero. But what are you without that?”
The villain took another step forward.
“Your nothing, heroism is all you have. That pathetic title you curl up to every night. But without it?” They looked the hero up and down, “Absolutely nothing…”
19
A villain retires from villainy and gets plastic surgery (or simply never showed their face) so they can live a normal life without being recognized. While living their new life, they bump into the hero, and the two start falling for eachother. But the villain is terrified of the hero finding out the truth
20
The hero slammed their front door as quickly as they could, eyes wide, heart pounding.
The villain. The villain was outside their door.
“Well that was rude,”
21
A hero with magic powers, in a world where magic is unheard of. They have always kept their powers a secret, fearing they would be shunned, or tested on. They never use their powers in battle.
One day, while practicing their magic alone in the woods, the villain appears out of nowhere. 
Before the hero can explain, the villain asks, “you have powers too?”
22
A hero dies. Or at least, they think they do. The next thing they know they wake up at their own funeral. And the only person there? Is the villain.
23
“The worst part, is you had the nerve to call it love”
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the-darklings · 3 years
Text
—𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒓𝒖𝒕𝒉 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒔𝒆𝒕 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒇𝒓𝒆𝒆;
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—PART XVIII. | THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE
pairing: john wick x f!reader x santino d’antonio
word count: 36.2k+ (honk, honk, honk x 2)
summary: “You’re just a little tragedy, aren’t you?”
warnings: swearing, strong violence, blood, likely some emotional damage to readers inbound
notes: I waited for this chapter for a very, very long time and been laying the foundation for 250k. Lets begin. 
children of ares series: 01 | …. | 16 | 17 | . . | 19 |
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Sometimes he genuinely wonders how many poor decisions led him here.
To this exact moment in time. To this exact set of circumstances.
“I wish to see him.”
Winston tilts his head at the cool demand, not letting any outwards reaction slip.
The Adjudicator stares him down like the request should have been fulfilled yesterday. He’s not, admittedly, used to people making such demands. Especially not so brazenly. And inside his own hotel no less.
He gazes at them for a beat before nodding his head stagily.
“Forgive me and my old age,” he begins calmly. “But who exactly do you wish to see? The chef perhaps?”
He knows perfectly well who the Adjudicator wants to see. Judging by the slight, annoyed pinch of their mouth so do they. Charon stands a step behind the High Table’s associate and his expression is as professionally cool as always. In truth, however, they are both wary at best.
“You know of whom I speak,” the Adjudicator snips, their voice that calm, almost robotic cold. “Santino D’Antonio was shot at this hotel, was he not? Mr Wick fired the shot but the bullet failed to kill him. To our knowledge, he is still in your care. Or is that incorrect?”
Keep him safe.
Such a simple request. A request to keep a man he barely tolerates on a good day shielded from other sharks. For once, Winston wishes you cared about yourself as much as you do about others.  
You, Santino, John—you’re all I have. I can’t lose anyone else. I can’t.
Sometimes—often—the memory of those words worries him. Truly. Wild, relentless drive and desperation rarely mix well together. The former you have plenty of and the latter has been mounting too rapidly for his liking.
Silencing his thoughts, Winston tilts his head in an accommodating manner. Conjuring an innocent expression, he nods his head for what feels like the hundredth time in the last hour alone.
“Ah, yes, Mr D’Antonio. Tragic, truly, but the Vipress saved his life,” he explains smoothly, watching the individual before him with the same shrewdness the Adjudicator is watching him. “Rather heroically, too. Quite surprising that the Table did not see her actions as such.”
The Adjudicator’s eyes narrow. From their spot on the office chair, the Table’s representative regards him with disinterested, yet vexed expression. Clearly, his approach of talking circles and giving half-answers about your and Johnathan’s whereabouts has not left a good impression.
That’s exactly the point though.
“The woman known to us as the Vipress had plenty of chances to stop Mr Wick,” the Adjudicator answers; an expected explanation, a pitiless one, too. “She failed. Even though she is one of the few individuals realistically capable of such a feat. Therefore, under our assessment, there is nothing here to celebrate.”
Winston turns, lowering his whiskey glass back onto the table. He leans back towards it, completely relaxed, his palms resting against the edges of the smooth wood.
“Loyalty,” he muses lightly, letting the word hang in the air for a bit. “Such rarity nowadays, would you not agree? It is rather difficult to stay neutral when you have an emotional investment in both parties caught in the conflict.”
The Adjudicator stands at that, their willowy frame stretching to their full height. Little sympathy can be found in their stony expression. “Only loyalty to the High Table should matter. The Vipress has shown to have very little of it. Now, Mr D’Antonio?”
He didn’t expect this to be easy. But he doesn’t let so much as a whisper of his exasperation show. Winston considers, calculating what harm could be done versus the gap of time it might buy him, hesitating for only a beat before dipping his head in agreement.
“Of course, follow me,” he says pleasantly, gesturing with his arm. “He came out of surgery several days ago.”
Over the Adjudicator’s shoulder, a faint glint of surprise shows on Charon’s face before the man blinks it away swiftly. The concierge knows better than to question outright. Old and tested loyalty lives between them. The manager always does things for a reason, and the concierge follows graciously every time because he knows as much.
The Adjudicator stalks after him silently, Charon a few steps behind them. The elevator ride down is silent and tense. No need for empty exchanges between them and neither party bothers pretending otherwise.
Only a day left on the clock. Then he’s expected to step back and leave his hotel—his legacy—behind to some stranger the Table deems worthy. The thought alone almost makes him scoff again.
The High Table can take the Continental from his cold, dead hands.
And he imagines there are at least one or two individuals who may have something to say about that.
You have contributed to the chaos, little hatchling, but what now? You can’t win this game by sacrificing your Queen.
The elevator halts with a rumble. Worn metal creaks. Winston reaches out, pulling back the metal partition. The white hallways of the medical wing are silent and undisturbed by the bustle of the front foyer. Heaviness hangs in the air as he strolls down the long stretch of white, his shoes clicking against the spotless flooring. Charon and the Adjudicator are only several steps behind him but he’s in no hurry.
They round the corner and three heads turn in their direction.
The fourth doesn’t move.
Here we go.
Camorra’s Elite Four sit like guard dogs of the most vicious variety at the end of the lengthy hallway. Behind them stands a door. Behind that door, Winston knows, Santino D’Antonio now lays, clinging to his life and healing. Hopefully. He couldn’t care less about the Italian living or dying, but for your sake, he needs the arrogant man to pull through.  
The closer they come, the tenser the air becomes.
The tallest and broadest of the guards is leaning against the wall but pushes away from it upon their approach, uncrossing his arms as he stops in their path. The first line of defence.  
Another—the sharpshooter, if Winston recalls correctly—rises a second behind that, lowering a gleaming pistol he was fiddling with. Eyes narrowed, distrustful.
The youngest—the smiling nightmare, as you’ve called him once—doesn’t shift from his spot on the floor, a laptop in his lap. A pop of chewing gum fills the silence when he glances up lazily at the commotion over his round sunglasses.
And finally closest to the door—nearest to the Camorra boss, always the most vicious and final deterrent—stands the Devil of Camorra. He doesn’t look at them. He almost appears thoughtful, playing with a lighter in his hand as he leans against the wall.
Click, click, click.
“Can we help you?” the tallest asks politely, his Italian accent faint but still noticeable.
The sharpshooter stands by his side, frowning faintly.
A polite, unspoken warning hangs in the air. The woman—D’Antonio’s bodyguard that you’ve called a good friend on many occasions—appears to be missing. Though Winston doubts she’s far behind. He’s seen her by the Italian side for almost as many years as he’s seen you.
The Adjudicator speaks before he can. “I wish to see the Camorra family head, and the new member of the High Table, Santino D’Antonio.”
“Respectfully, who are you supposed to be?” the sharpshooter demands, his dark eyes narrowing marginally.
Loyal. To a degree at least. Winston had been hopeful they would be. He’s not surprised to see them standing guard, either. He’s betting on them continuing doing so.
“An Adjudicator,” the youngest quips from his spot on the floor, his fingers clicking across the keyboard. Another pop of gum follows. “Sent to adjudicate this hotel, I bet. Bang, bang—not a good look for the sturdy, old table. Seccante.”
The Adjudicator’s head slants; a calculating motion. “The Chameleon of Camorra,” they state flatly, unimpressed. “Former association with an organisation known as Slifer before Giovanni D’Antonio recruited you to Camorra’s ranks, correct?”
The young man in question drops his head back with a gleaming smile. The tattoos across his neck ripple with the gesture, and a gleam of white appears even brighter in the artificial light.  
“Oh yeah,” he drawls, amused. “Papi Giovanni welcomed me with open arms.”
There is clearly more to this tale. The implication is blatant even if the words are presented as a joke but Winston can still read it.
“You can’t see him.”
All eyes slide towards the Camorra Devil. His voice is gravelly, uncompromising, and he still doesn’t bother looking at them. Part arrogance, Winston imagines, and part genuine disinterest with them and the situation.  
“I have the right—”
“We have orders not to let anyone see Santino until he’s fit enough to take back command.”
At long last, the Devil turns towards them. The look in his icy eyes is a clear, if barely polite, warning. The man called Hector always had a reputation for being Giovanni’s most violent lapdog. Serving Camorra for years without a single falter. That level of loyalty is admittedly rare, especially when Winston knows others have tried to recruit the Devil in the past.
Hector, unlike you, has never been bound by a debt that kept him chained to Camorra. He stays because he wants to. If there are any other reasons for that loyalty, they’re unknown to the manager.
Though Winston has never interacted with the leader of the Elite’s, he’s heard plenty about him, and can understand why his name is spoken with trepidation. Despite it being subtle, the air around the man is still hostile. Brimming with a promise of violence.
“Whose orders?” the Adjudicator interrogates. “The council of Camorra—”
Whatever card they were hoping to play gets crushed in seconds.
“Our current acting boss. The Vipress,” the Devil announces, sounding annoyed, and pockets his lighter before pushing away from the wall. Another pop of gum ripples from the youngest Elite. Hector prowls closer, deliberately slow, and walks past the other two members of the guard. The Devil halts in front of the Adjudicator, appearing utterly bored. “You might be familiar with her. Stubborn, demanding, likes knives a little too much, starts shit wherever she goes. Santino named her his heir. No one is allowed to see him on her orders.”
Winston has to bite back a small smile. Perfect.
The Adjudicator stands completely still, their stare hard while they process the new information.
The manager hangs back, not saying a word, watching the silent face-off with vague amusement. He has to admit that at least the Devil doesn’t lack nerve. The other three don’t appear nearly as intimidated as they should be, either.
Adjudicators are feared for a reason. They have a vast reserve of power bestowed upon them by the highest tiers of the Table. Adjudicators stand even above Continental managers. Something Winston has been rather unpleasantly reminded of with Johnathan’s latest actions.
“The will of the Table stands above the individual order of someone who has been made Excommunicado.”
Mild but icy. Clearly, the not-so-subtle defiance from the Devil of Camorra hasn’t gone down well, either. Behind the tall man, the other two shift in their spots, tense. An exaggerated sigh sounds from behind them, and the chameleon rises to his feet as well. Cracking his neck, he strolls towards his associates, leaning his shoulder against the sharpshooter. The other man doesn’t so much as blink, clearly used to such antics.
“We answer to the will of the Camorra boss only,” Hector informs coolly, his tone just barely passing for polite. “We have since the beginning of Camorra family inception.”
We don’t answer to you, goes unsaid but the double meaning is clear. Winston straightens, a touch surprised. He wasn’t aware that such a divide existed between the highest tier of Camorra members and a top level High Table representative. He wonders if it’s more so the threat to their boss—the last D’Antonio left to carry the bloodline that founded Camorra centuries ago—or simple dislike that is driving such blatant disobedience.
The manager sincerely doubts that this refusal to comply is born out of genuine loyalty towards you or respect for your command. Especially from the Devil who holds no loyalties other than one towards Camorra.
The Adjudicator’s head dips, their short black hair appearing even darker in the bright light.
“There are rules. You are not above them,” they speak briskly, softly. “No one is above them. You are all bound to the will of the Table and exist under it.”
Another obnoxiously loud pop of the gum and the youngest of the Elite’s grins. “Actually we’re part of the Table,” he notes nonchalantly, but there is something icy about the slight edge to his grin. Distantly, Winston recalls you telling him that from all the Elites, it’s the chameleon you won’t want as your enemy the most. “Take one leg out and the whole table wobbles.”
The silence that follows those words is stifling. No one speaks or moves.
“No rules have been broken,” Hector eventually bites out, blunt but controlled. “We’re just guarding our boss. Shouldn’t you be commending our loyalty, huh?”
An unexpected bait but not one the Adjudicator rises to. Their expression remains steely, their eyes dragging over the Camorra Four before they finally turn away.
“Very well,” they intone flatly, their eyes narrowing marginally, and their tone dismissive. “Next time I will return with a direct order to stand down.”
“You do that,” the Devil shoots back without missing a beat.
The Adjudicator pauses, their eyes flickering back towards the man, digging into him for a moment before their attention drops away. Winston remains composed when the Adjudicator’s stare moves to him next, cold as ice, an unspoken burn of anger present in their eyes. Clearly, they’re not very used to not being heeded.
“I will be in my room.”
The Adjudicator doesn’t stick around to see if anyone has anything to say about that. They turn to go without sparing anyone another word, their steps brisk and sharp, betraying the displeasure absent from their frosty expression.
It’s quiet while they all stand, listening to the sound of retreating footsteps and, eventually, the whirl of the elevator going up.
It’s only then that the Elites relax, their guarded demeanours easing a bit.
“So mean spirited,” the chameleon mutters under his breath, unimpressed, and turns to go back to his laptop. “Exhausting.”
“Gentlemen.”
Winston nods his head at the Devil specifically, but Hector only grunts under his breath with a roll of his eyes. Briefly, he glances at Charon, his eyes narrowing before he turns away and stalks back to his previous spot.
Conversation over.
Fine by him.
The other two—the sharpshooter and the strength—return his nod, polite but stiff.
Winston tips his head in their direction one last time, and turns on his heels to go. No one stops him, and Charon trails after the manager a few seconds later.
It’s only when they both step into the elevator, the door closing softly behind them, that Charon finally speaks, “Nicely done, sir.”
Winston sighs, his shoulders dropping.
“It’s only a temporary deterrent, I’m afraid,” he admits and knows he’s right. If the Adjudicator does get that order the Four will not be enough. “The hatchling?”
The concierge straightens, his hands folded behind his back.
“The last sighting was reported as the Moroccan Continental, sir.”
There is a tickle of relief followed by a sting of concern. “Good. Then she as good as made it.”
He’s still not quite sure how he feels about the idea, however.
“If I may, sir,” Charon begins as if sensing the manager’s unease. “You do not look pleased about that.”
There is no point in trying to deny it, so Winston doesn’t.
“Not at all,” he agrees smoothly, feeling the elevator halt and the concierge moves ahead, opening the partition for them. “If it had been up to me, she never would have had to go back there. But she’s been reckless and manoeuvred herself into a corner with only one ace left to play. Herself.”
Seven years in this world. Seven long years of fighting for freedom and now there is a reputation that has been built upon that desperation. A reputation that has attracted all sorts of attention over the years.
Charon both looks and sounds troubled while they walk through the lobby. “Is there a reason for concern, sir?”
All these moving pieces forming an ever-shifting pattern. Something has been brewing for a while now. Winston can’t help but feel like he’s missing and not seeing something crucial. Like all those pieces are put together at a slightly wrong angle, disorientating the whole picture.
What will you do now, little hatchling?
The Elder. That history between you, that story you shared—they all weigh heavily on the manager’s mind. Always have.
He comes to a gradual stop.
“Oh, yes,” he mutters, pensive, shaking his head as he glances at the concierge beside him with open unease. “Most certainly.”
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Every breath takes notable effort.
Your instincts pinprick, trying to acclimate to the too-familiar surroundings—count and anticipate any potential threats. Everything about being back here feels so familiar it is its own kind of torture.
Your skin itches. One side of your face and hands—everywhere the scorching sun has managed to touch you the most—stretches uncomfortably with every twitch of your muscles. It’s a discomfort that comes with sunburns often earned in an unforgiving terrain like the desert, and you try to lick your dry lips, lifting your head. Your vision swims immediately, an explosion of vivid spots blinding you, and you careen dangerously to one side, hissing under your breath.
Eyes track every jerk of your body, and you know full well you’re not alone in this tent.
You’re almost afraid to look at him. Then feel idiotic for feeling that way. Maybe it’s because you had hoped that this chapter of your life was shut and laid to rest long ago, and it’s a hard pill to swallow, knowing that he was right after all.
“Drink.”
It’s then that you notice a cup sitting on a small, wooden table to the side. Part of you wants to cackle till you choke when you realise it’s the same green cup you drank from during your first test with him years ago.
Gathering yourself, you reach for the cup despite your dread, your digits folding around it carefully.
The drink inside smells minty and fresh but you don’t find anything amiss with it on the first inspection. A vague recollection of a similar scent tickling your senses when you were coming in and out of consciousness comes crawling back. With that in mind, you finally tip the cup down, taking a purposeful sip.
It empties in three slow gulps and you lower it back onto the table, still silent. It does make you feel better instantly, lifting the dense fog that was previously crushing your mind. A sense of déjà vu nips at your senses but you push it back. Not much point in delaying this. Though it doesn’t surprise you that he gave you time to gather yourself.  
Kindness with this man, you have long since learned, comes in the smallest of gestures. Tiniest of moments.
Drawing your knees closer, you sit up slowly, your head lowered.
“Why have you come?”
His words send a shiver down your spine that has little to do with heat. You’ve forgotten how much quiet power always rings through his baritone. His smooth, accented words wash over you like a tidal wave; gentle as they are dangerous. Misleading with their softness.
Swallowing, you force your limbs to obey you—to shift the worn muscles into an appropriate position. One knee digs into the carpet beneath you, your hands lacing over your bent thigh when you reposition yourself into a kneeling position. Your head is still lowered and you realise, then, that it isn’t fear of punishment that’s forcing you to stare at the ground.  
It’s him.
He once managed to get under your guard with startling ease and you scrubbed him away. Walked away from him and everything he offered. Tried to forget him despite the cracks. Your choice had made you feel powerful back then. In control. Despite there being a part of you that had longed to stay, you never quite regretted your decision to leave.
Worst, perhaps, is the knowledge that it wasn’t one-sided. You weren’t foolishly pining after the most powerful man in the world. You weren’t naively seeing something that didn’t exist. If anything, his interest in you had been more obvious from the start.
“I—” you mumble, near choking on your suddenly heavy tongue and mangled thoughts. “I came to seek repentance for my actions.”
Silence follows your muffled words and you stare at the ruby ring on your hand intently.
Will he turn you away? Consider you naive and foolish for hoping there’s some semblance of hope?
And where is John? Did he only pick you up and not him? Your weapons—what few you still have—are still on you because you can feel them against your body with every inhale and exhale.
Your empty stomach rolls and you have to bite back the acid welling at the back of your throat the longer you wait. The thrumming of your own heart almost drowns out his voice when the answer does finally come.
“Stand, viper,” the Elder states calmly. “You do not grovel at my feet.”
And just like that your breaths calm. Your dread ebbs like sea waves receding. With his words, you remember that you met as equals and parted as such despite you unearthing his true identity.
He’s right. You don’t grovel at his feet. Or anyone’s.
You stand at once, balancing on your heels, and square your shoulders. The lock of your jaw is a firm one, your stare steady and the steel in your stance returns easily. In that, it feels like no time has passed at all.
Straightening, you look ahead and meet his inquisitive stare evenly.
This time the sight that greets you is befitting the man who rules the High Table. This is how you had expected him to be the first time you met. A golden chair that reminds you more of a throne, and extravagant robes that breathe wealth and showcase his status. Surrounded by his people in a subtle warning though you know he can more than hold his own.
He oozes that unnerving authority but his face is still familiar. Few years have passed since you’ve last seen him, yet he barely looks any different. If it weren’t for several new lines creasing his face, you would have thought that time has simply paused here while you’ve been gone.
The quiet intensity of his heated regard hasn’t changed, either. Nor has the unease or the thrill that comes with having his complete attention on you.
He watches you unblinkingly and you find yourself swallowing again, an immovable knot sitting in your throat.
“Here you are.”
It’s a soft, thoughtful statement and you’re not quite sure what to make of his words or his demeanour, so you settle on a simple, “Here I am.”
He stands at that, his robes rustling in the wake of his sudden movement. His steps are measured and leisurely as he approaches. The Elder’s stare takes every inch of you in and you don’t lower your eyes. He doesn’t look particularly pleased with what he finds and you can’t help but wonder why.  
It still kills a small part of you. That you had to come back but only because you need a favour from him. Not because you returned to join him or even visit him, if you even could.
A part of you…
“I thought that maybe…” you mutter when he halts before you—all heat, spice, and that razor-sharp gaze that seems to burn into you—his hands lacing in front of him as he watches you keenly. “That maybe you forgot about me.”
It’s been years after all. You’re just you. One person in a machine so much larger than yourself. If Elder considered Tarasov to be nothing more than a piece in a more elaborate game years ago—at the near height of his power—then you couldn’t have possibly been that important. Or even noteworthy. He might have thought highly of you once but that was then.
His expression, however, gives you an answer before he can verbally do so.
“How could I?” he questions curiously, softly. As if the concept of forgetting you is truly an inconceivable one for him.
You work your tongue, trying to think of something to say, something clever, but nothing comes.
You simply stare up at him mutely, taking him in, and he you, and it does indeed feel like no time has passed between you. Even though so much is different now.
“I almost came back. Once,” you confess in a breathless rush, blinking rapidly because it’s hard to keep a straight expression under that scrutiny. “I got desperate and angry and…”
And Tarasov won’t let you help Camorra with the Albanians. Had treated you like nothing more than a dog, reminding you of your place. Dependant on his goodwill of which he had none. So you had ran like a reckless idiot. Sick and tired of being dependent on his word. Hoping for his mercy or any crumb of kindness.
“I know,” he murmurs in reply, a secret for you alone. “I waited for you.”
Air escapes your lungs at that mild admittance. At the way his eyes drag over your features, savouring but still guarded—always guarded. Everywhere from your eyes, to the dip of your collarbone, and the bow of your lips. There are others scattered around the tent but it feels like you’re the only ones here.
The golden hue of his eyes glints with knowing light at your reaction, and you force your tongue to work, “I wish to explain myself.”
He nods his head once. Prompt as it is anticipatory. You imagine that to him this is all playing out exactly as he’d been expecting it to. You’re back but a part of you is mangled exactly like he predicted it would be. Vengeance has led you here. Tarasov may be dead but you have only dug yourself into a deeper hole.
“You came all this way,” he says knowingly, his head slanting and lips thinning into an enigmatic half-smile. “Speak freely, viper.”
Your eyes, in return, sweep warily over others inside the tent. Some familiar faces. Others are unknown to you. Only pointed stares and blank expressions greet your curiosity. Inscrutable, severe stares that judge your every move and word. Saad is nowhere to be seen. That surprises you but you don’t let it show.
The Elder notes your wariness, not bothering to look away from you when he commands a soft, “Leave us.”
As one, everyone inside the tent rises. They don’t question, nor do they linger. They file out in a neat line, their robes rustling in the breeze, and you stare after them, surprised. You didn’t expect him to dismiss everyone solely because you felt uneasy talking to him with others around. Although seeing the space clear out is, admittedly, a relief.
Now it’s you two alone and it changes the air between you again. This puts you back in time, even if you try to remain unaffected.
But it’s hard not to. A part of you still sees him as Rafik. A man you have spent endless hours talking to about everything and nothing—a man you considered close to you—despite knowing full well that Rafik isn’t even his real name. In fact, you have no idea what his name is. Or who he is. Not really. He’s still just layers upon layers of mystery. Power. Ancient and tangible.
The way he gazes at you makes you think that isn’t the case, however. There is warmth woven into his regard, an almost fondness that despite being muted is clear to you.
The darkness of that stare is arresting when he reaches out, the warmth of his fingertips ghosting over your bandaged ear. You don’t hold back your wince of pain, pulling away from the contact.
The Elder’s mouth slants downwards at that, his eyes narrowing marginally. He looks thoughtful, displeased almost. The shadow across his expression is new to you. You’ve seen him as many things but tense and unhappy is not one of them.
“What have they done to you?”
It’s a quiet question—a collection of sharp, hard syllables—dragging themselves from somewhere deeper, you can tell.
Your lips part, ready to tell him everything but you stop yourself at once. How would he even look at you if you knew what you did? There would be no chance of forgiveness then. If he knew how badly you broke the very rules he enforces upon everyone in their world repeatedly.
With that in mind, you instead settle on a weak, “Guess you were right.”
Do not let that fire consume you.
He was right. He was always going to be right, you were just too blind and proud to admit it.  
His expression strains, his touch dropping away, and a glint catches your eye when his hand lowers. You feel a thud against your ribcage, and focus on that golden skin, barely breathing to a point his next words hardly register.
“This is not something I wished to be right about,” he says unhappily.
You swallow. Then again.
“You’re wearing it.”
He pauses. It doesn’t take long for him to figure out what you mean by that. The pad of his index finger brushes over the ring he’s wearing absentmindedly. The golden plate seems to gleam at the touch despite neither of you standing in direct sunlight.
“It was a gift,” he says gently in return, his features guarded once more. “A parting gift from you.”
It doesn’t explain much yet it explains everything.
On your last day together, when you visited Casablanca together, you had gotten it for him after arguing Saad out of some local currency under the guise of buying something for yourself. A souvenir as far as he knew back then. But the ring had caught your eye first. Handmade ring crafted out of pale golden metal. It reminded you of the sun that is his presence and the endless stretches of sand surrounding you.
Grinning, and more than a little unsure, you had presented it to him when you sat on the beach together, calling it a thank you present because you hadn’t worked up the courage to talk to him about leaving just yet. He had accepted it readily, his fingers lingering against yours when he took it, and even back then you couldn’t quite describe the emotion you glimpsed across his face.
You hadn’t dared to assume it was wonder back then, but it had been a close thing.
You certainly didn’t expect him to keep it after you left.
Or to still be wearing it after all these years. But maybe you’re jumping to conclusions and he’s only wearing it today. Specifically for this.
The silence between you changes yet again, morphing. Something more charged. Near oppressive.
Nerves flutter inside your tired body and you allow a soft wisp of breath to escape you, thinking of something to break the tension with.  
“Where is John?” you question quietly, your voice thick.
His jaw ticks, and he looks away, staring out towards the horizon.
“Mr Wick is safe,” he answers coolly. “Do not fret for him. He will answer for his wrongdoings in due time.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
The Elder turns to face you again, and it unnerves you because he keeps slipping between the man you lived with for months, and the man who controls the High Table. One is close to you, familiar. The other feels removed, walled off. No longer a sun but a cold, distant star. Unreachable to you.
His expression softens a touch when he notices your startled expression.
“Mr Wick has returned only to unleash havoc,” he informs you calmly, matter of factly. He doesn’t sound or look angry or even displeased, yet something about the piercing gleam in his eyes makes you think that it will not be a confrontation without consequences. “His punishment will reflect that. He made the decisions that led him here,” he fades off, pausing, his stare flickering over your features once more. “As have you,” he adds.
“I’m sorry,” you force out, shaking your head, cringing slightly at the pain that flares through your skin at that. “They’re both important to me and—”
“I am not speaking about Santino D’Antonio getting shot, viper.”
Your head snaps up, your features slacking with confusion. “Then what...”
The Elder lifts his hand, his attention focusing on the ring on his finger instead. He seems to struggle with something internally before sighing softly and dragging his stare away from you once more. You wonder why. It’s almost as if it’s difficult for him to look at you.
“Do not tell me you were so quick to forget my warning to you,” he begins calmly, something aloof lingering in his voice. He walks past you, his fingertips tapping on his ring repeatedly. Your own fingers tighten into a fist when you note the shift in him, the Camorra ring pressing into your skin as a bleak reminder. Your eyes follow him as he goes, watching his broad back when he stops at the edge of the tent, looking out towards the vastness of the desert. “I told you what will happen if anything befalls Viggo Tarasov before your debt is repaid.”
Ice pierces you, burrowing under your skin viciously, and you’re glad that he can’t see your face because for a second your expression comes apart completely.
“I did not—”
“Do you really think I know you so little that lying to me would work?”
Your mouth snaps shut, a bitter tang stinging the inside of your mouth. He’s right. You feel as disappointed in yourself as he sounds. You’ve always prided yourself on being forward and direct. Yet your instinct now had been to lie, to deny, because the idea of him knowing terrifies you.
Because it puts you in so much worse of a position than what you first expected to be in.
How? Why would he even think—
The High Table would have—
“I know why you came here,” he says, at last, turning to face you again. His expression is grim and he watches you closely as he strolls closer. Despite his leisurely gait, his stare is searing. “You came in hopes that I would lift the Excommunicado. You came in hopes that you can clear your name. But your crimes run deeper than you are willing to admit to me.”
“I’ve disappointed you,” you assume blankly. “Is that it?”
He shakes his head once. “No, viper,” he responds placidly, his eyebrows knitting. “You have disappointed yourself. You are so much better than this. Yet your recklessness has led you to this. Did you really think that I would not find out?”
He comes to a stop before you again and you meet his stare.
There is no point in lying, so you don’t.
“If you knew,” you start, choked, forcing down your emotions as you search his face, and try to quieten the pounding of your heart. “Then why was I not declared Excommunicado sooner?”
A long beat of suffocating silence, and then, “Because I shielded you.”
He says it so simply. Like it’s as expected as the sun rising each morning. A faint knell of wind chimes fills the hush between you this time, and you peer at him in disbelief. Shock.
“What?” you exhale shakily.
The Elder shakes his head once, sighing. “I gave you a chance in hopes that you will take it and savour your new freedom,” he explains smoothly, his fingertips still dancing over the ring. His strong profile only accents his handsomeness and you see the conflict there—see the shadows dancing inside the inky pools that are his eyes. “I overlooked your wrongdoing. Because I understood your pain then as I do now. I cautioned the Table to look the other way. But what did you do with this gift, viper? You wasted it. And there is nothing to be done now. Even I cannot shield you from the storm that has been unleashed. The scale has been tipped towards chaos now. You broke the rules in the open, for the whole world to see,” he continues, each word making your heart beat harder inside your chest, his attention returning to you, “And now here you are.”
So that’s why.
Why there was such a long pause between Tarasov’s death and administration contacting you about you being free of your debt. The silence that made you so uneasy back then. The High Table had been suspicious, had assumed you played a part, but the Elder pulled their attention away from you.
Years later, he’s still looking out for you.
You’re too speechless to say much past gaping at him; a thousand thoughts fluttering through your mind, all of them wild and hurtful.
Your attention falls to the carpet beneath your feet, and stays there for some time while you digest what this means.
He knows. He’s known for weeks now.
Just like that the already shaky foundation beneath your feet slips further.
Helplessness closes in and your eyes sting.
Consequences. Everything has a price and it was foolish of you to assume that your luck will continue. You’ve been too quick to celebrate and now...
“What now?”
A whisper of material sounds in your ears and the heat of his palm comes to rest against one side of your face. You feel that warmth sink deep into your skin and it burns. Both a physical ache and something deeper. Your eyes open as he guides your face upwards for him to see.
You lean on the side of caution and say nothing, waiting for him to speak first.  
“Now, my viper,” he whispers, a touch forlorn. “You face the consequences of your actions.”
Forcing down your fear, you give him a firm, unyielding, “If you’re going to kill me, at least make it quick.”
His palm pulls back but not all the way. His knuckles trace over the curve of your cheek—so faint you barely register the sensation. “I would never kill you.”
“But?”
He seems to be considering something hard, his regard in a constant flux between warring emotions, “But you cannot be seen as walking away without punishment after what’s happened. It is the way of things,” he finally concludes.
You pull away from his touch, your eyes burning, “So be it,” you mutter, shaky and forcefully casual. “But I don’t regret stepping in. I don’t regret any of it. I would do it all again.”
Even if it meant the pain and the heartache. Sleepless nights and blood.
Because at least they’re all alive. Even if this is the sacrifice for that victory.
You saved them, and you would never regret that.
“Is this love?”
Your attention snaps back to him at the gentle murmur of his question. There is little distance between you—to a point you can feel the heat of his broad build and the phantom sensation of his exhales against your skin.
He didn’t specify who the love is for.
Deep down, you know it’s not so simple to untangle who means what to you anymore. It’s a mess of different emotions and loyalties. Everyone in your life that has made themselves a place in it, you love fiercely. Even if they’re all different kinds of love. All you know—all you need to know—is that you would gladly stand here for any of them. Punishment and consequences be damned.
“Yes.”
You’re not sure why you expect him to be irritated, perhaps even disappointed in your answer, but he only seems to consider your words for a while.
Fierce desert heat rolls across your skin while you wait for a response but he seems to be in no rush to provide you with one. His lips part, his head lowering and he makes a small sound at the back of his throat; half-disbelieving, and half-thoughtful.  
“How odd,” he muses faintly, his features drawing into something desolate. “I do not quite recall the last time I felt envy.”
Your eyes flutter shut, trying to push his words and the emotion in them away. He means that genuinely, and you know that. You’ve lived with him for months and have seen a great many sides to him. That loneliness—that drive to be something more, to be understood by someone else—is what drew you together in the first place. Bonded you as deeply as it did.
Despite the nip of sadness you feel for him, you don’t contradict him—don’t say anything at all, in fact.
“What is it that you want from me?”
The Elder appears lost in his head for a while before he finally responds, “You already know, viper,” he says in a knowing murmur. “Otherwise you would not look at me with such sadness in your eyes.”
“You want me to stay.”
“Yes,” he agrees with a slight nod, his previous melancholy receding, and his guard slipping back on. “It is the only way that your life can be spared. Your service to the High Table will be used to absolve you of your crimes.”
You can’t quite help the bitter, brief laugh that slips free from you. “And is love a crime? I’m being punished for caring. For wanting to keep my family safe.”
He doesn’t say anything but you can guess what he’s thinking.
You broke the rules. Killed Tarasov. Interfered when you could have killed John and proven your loyalty to the High Table. Rules apply to all—no exceptions.
You don’t want to think about what would be the outcome if he knew about Chicago as well. Then, you conclude numbly, even his favour won’t save you from death.
“For how long?”
The Elder doesn’t reply. You already know, his expression seems to say though, and your composure fractures. Sucking in a deep breath, you chew on your inner cheek, half-turning away from him.
Because of course you know.
“For life,” you choke out.
“Yes,” he agrees, his voice gentle. “You will become my fourth disciple, and my apprentice, working directly under me,” he explains carefully, watching you just as closely, and you fight to keep a straight expression. “I am sorry, (Name), I wish there had been another way. But we are each masters of our own fate. You gave this life a chance once before and you embraced it effortlessly.”
You know that. You know that compared to what could have happened, this is a mercy. He will treat you fairly, kindly, and you’ve almost made this place, his people, your new life once before. If anything, on the surface alone, this is more of a gift than a punishment, especially with the amount of power you will gain by joining him.
And yet.
This also means that you will rarely, if ever, see your friends and family again.
Everyone you love and care for will be removed from you. People who join the Elder don’t go back to their old lives. Service to the High Table becomes their new life. The tribe, their new family.
No Winston or Charon. Santino or John. No Ares or the Elites. No Sofia or Cassian.
Just no one.
The tear you feel in your heart at that thought nearly makes you choke on a sob. For all the physical agony you’ve been through in these last several weeks, this somehow hurts the most. The notion that you will never see them again, will never get to touch them or laugh with them, is agonising. Somehow it hurts even more than the realisation that you will be bound yet again, unable to be free, unable to live for yourself just like you always dreamt of.
A hand reaches for you but you stumble back a step, still not looking at him.  
“You will not be my prisoner, viper,” he tells you seriously. “I would never take that from you. But you—”
“Can never see them again, is that it?” you cut him off sharply.
You know he’s not used to being spoken to like that. You doubt anyone has even tried but when you lift your eyes to his, you notice how his own features smoothen in response to what he sees on your face. The grief and the pain. The raw, suffocating grip of it shackling you and dragging you down, down, down—
He doesn’t deny your words, however, and that’s answer enough.
“I know this is hard,” he says instead, and you think that sympathy you spy in his dark eyes is genuine, well-meant. “But I warned you where this path will lead you. You did not listen.”
It doesn’t help though.
God, it hurts so much. This is somehow worse than when John left. Worse even, is the fact that you have no one to blame. Not even the Elder. You did this yourself. Went into this fully knowing there is a chance it will all blow up in your face.
“Can I at least...say goodbye?” you wonder, your words thin, and inhale deeply despite the dry, hot air giving you little relief. “Spend some time with them before I leave?”
The Elder hesitates. “A week.”
You shake your head, stepping closer towards him. “Six months.”
His head slants; a colder, more authoritative motion. “Are you bargaining with me, viper?”
There is no hesitation in your reply, not this time, “Yes.”
“And what bargaining power do you have?”
It’s a curious question as opposed to condescending. Almost as if he’s trying to gauge how you will react, and you force your emotions back, licking your lips once. Your thumb smoothes against the inside of the metal band on your hand.
“I’m the acting boss of Camorra,” you remind him, straightening your shoulders once more despite the way you can feel your pulse fluttering against the base of your neck. You’re not sure if it betrays you but you certainly don’t let it show. “And I would respectfully ask that you give me six months. It will not change anything in the long run.”
The Elder’s attention drifts towards your hand, and he closes whatever little distance there is between you, reaching for it. You tense despite yourself when he carefully takes your clenched fist into his palm and lifts it between you. His thumb traces over your bruised knuckle—a tender, careful touch as if not to hurt you further—and a pensive hum slips free as he stares at the ring on your hand.
“You wear power beautifully,” he comments idly, and you have to hold back a shiver at the feeling of his thumb continuously journeying over your skin; nothing more than a tickle, a promise of warmth. The touch hurts as much as it soothes. “Three months. Offered to you only because you dare where others don’t. Because I am not unreasonable and while this is a punishment, I do not wish to see you unhappy.”
Too late for that nearly escapes you but you bite your tongue.
Three months. Just three. It will pass in a blink and then…
A lifetime away from everything you love, everything that is home and safety. Everything that’s important to you.  
“May...may I have a moment?” you request weakly. “Just to…”
He releases his grip on your hand and it falls to your side heavily. “Of course,” he voices graciously. “I will be back shortly but take the time you need.”
He steps past you once more but this time he heads towards the direction other men had left in earlier. He doesn’t pause and he doesn’t turn back to look at you, his gait slow but self-assured. You wait till his broad back disappears from your sight before you feel your expression crumble completely.
Pressing a hand against your face, you ignore the flare of pain where you dig too hard into your sunburnt skin. Instead, you focus everything inside yourself on controlling your despair and tears. You can’t fall apart now. Not after how far you’ve come and all you’ve been through.
Shuddering breaths wheeze past your mouth and nose, your shoulders quivering. Better to allow yourself this weakness now, alone, than to let the Elder or anyone see this slip.
Your shaking hands drag themselves away from your face and mouth, and your palm pushes against your breastbone. Beneath the material of your jumpsuit and skin, your heart hammers inside your chest like a wild beast desperate to escape. So afraid of the chain once again.
But what can you do? There is no other option. No escape. Nowhere to run, and even if you did, such action would only paint a bigger target on people closest to you. The only thing you would do by running is reassuring their demise.
The heel of your palm presses harsher against your sternum, maybe in some naive hope that you can tear your own heart out and it would be—
Oh.
You still, an unsettling sort of hush falling over you when a dark, insidious whisper slithers into your mind after all. You keep your palm close against the curve of your breast and think.
What would Winston do if he were here right now?
There is only one option, really.
Just the one.
But your mind and instincts go to battle at once. One side arguing for it and other against it. If you succeed...but if you fail…
But what other choice is there? Servitude or death? No.
A frustrated sound tears from the back of your throat and you drop your hand, standing to your full height, your eyes squeezing shut.
No. No, you will not let this pass. You will no longer be controlled. You’ve had enough.
Fuck consequences. You will deal with them as they come. You shouldn’t be punished for killing the man who took everything from you in the first place. You should not be punished for saving someone you care for—for interfering.
Your blunt nails bite into your palms to a point of pain despite that resolve. Because digging through that determination and rage is fear. Very simple human fear but you bottle it and shove it deep down.
No time for that now.
Power is a dangerous thing. You have to be willing to lose everything in order to take it.
And that’s exactly it.
Lose everything.
Just like that your taut limbs relax, the pounding inside your head retreating and dulling into a muffled buzz. You step forward one slow step at the time before dropping heavily onto the very throne you woke up to find the Elder sitting on.
Your eyes flutter close and you mull over the new path you’re about to step on, bowing your head in acceptance. So much for dreams of freedom. Your fingers ghost over your collarbone again and you smile this time; a cold, broken fragment of a smile.
Eyes closed, you listen to the sounds of the desert for a while, calming yourself. Wind against silk and tapestries. Faintest of whooshes caused by wind teasing sand away from the outer surface of dunes surrounding the camp. Sandorms, at least, you have not missed.
Deep down you can’t help but think that you always knew how this was going to end.  
People like us don’t get happy endings.
You ignore the ache inside your chest at the memory of Santino’s face, focusing instead on clearing your mind.
It takes at least another ten minutes before muted footsteps sound from ahead of you. You don’t lift your head at his approach, your arms hanging limp between your parted legs.
He pauses when he sees you. You suppose it’s rude, what you’re doing, sitting on his throne like it’s your own.
This time, you’re the one to tilt your head to one side, looking up at him from under your lashes.
The Elder doesn’t appear angry at your nerve to sit on his throne though. No rigidness to be found in his expression or slanting of his full mouth, not even a pinching of his brows; all telltale signs of his discontent usually. In fact, his eyes drag over your figure, lingering everywhere despite the distance.
For a man who doesn’t let others close, rarely lets his guard down in general, his appreciation—dare you say it, desire—is abundantly clear.
Jaw clamped tightly shut, you rise to your feet unhurriedly. Far steadier than you expected yourself to be capable of, and he steps closer towards you as well. Slow, bordering on cautious, and you wonder why. It’s like he’s afraid to blink lest you disappear.
But maybe that’s precisely it. Maybe he’s been hoping to walk into this tent and find you here every day since you’ve been gone. And now that you are here, he’s not quite sure what to do.
“How are you feeling?” he asks curiously, his accented words warming you like the setting sun, and you wonder what it may feel like to hear that voice for the rest of your life.
No turning back now.
Swallowing thickly, you ignore the pulsing numbness locking your throat, and wait for him to halt in front of you before you speak.
“I accept.”
A light sparks in his eyes—something burning and near living in its intensity, an emotion you have only glimpsed once before—as they roam over your features in search of an answer to a question he hasn’t asked.
“Three months,” you begin purposely, rushing your words out in a breathless whisper. He’s so close there’s hardly any distance between you at all—no room to turn away nor do you want to. The turquoise of his turban only seems to bring out the beauty of his dark eyes and golden skin. Draw you closer. He, too, hardly seems to be breathing while he listens to your words intently. “Then I come back here. To you. And stay. I will give this a chance but I can’t promise that it...will not be hard. In return…”
“The Excommunicado will be lifted upon your return to New York,” he reassures, still searching for something in your expression. “You have my word.”
His eyes lower and he breathes another sigh in a rare show of uncertainty.
“What is it?” you can’t help but wonder, confused.
“What proof do I have that you will uphold your word, viper?” he questions mildly, his probing stare digging into you. That challenging, clever stare that first got the warning bells ringing inside your head that this is not a man to be trifled with. “What will you give me in a show of fealty?”
You don’t say anything, peering up at him silently.
Seeing that, the Elder’s eyes slide towards your bare neck, and stop there. A second later, his strong fingers trace over the curve of the silver chain around your neck—
“No,” you choke out desperately, your hand snapping up to grip his own when his fingers slip around the metal. “Please, it’s not mine to give away.”
It’s Santino’s. When he gave it to you, over a year ago now, he asked to guard it for him, keep it safe. Even then, you knew it meant more to him than he would ever admit outright. You’re not quite sure where it comes from or who it belongs to but you have a strong inkling, and the idea of giving it away makes you feel sick to your stomach.
The Elder hesitates at your fragile plea, your eyes locking again, and fingers touching. “Yet it is important to you.”
More than he knows and certainly more than even you realised.
Here, now, faced with the prospect of losing it makes you think that you can’t live without it. That you need it or you will feel aimless and lost forever. It became an anchor slowly, with time, but now you value it above most things.
That realisation leaves you trembling before you conjure up some semblance of composure back.
“Please,” you plead again, soft and frayed. “Not this. I can give you something else. Something more.”
He doesn’t hide his palpable confusion, and that’s when you move closer, your fingers snaking up his neck as you lean forward and kiss him.
His moment of hesitation lasts no more than a split second before he grabs you around the waist, hauling you closer and you slip your arms around him, kissing him as deeply as you can. Your mouth hurts from how hard you kiss him, fervent and demanding, and despite his initial falter, he replies with equal drive and need. Your tongue slips inside his mouth, wet and hot, and you don’t compromise and neither does he. One hand grips the back of his neck where your nails sink into the firm, strong skin there, scratching and claiming. Your other drags across the scruff of his jaw, forcing him closer. Not that you need to, he holds you so close, every curve of your body presses into him.
He fuses you two together, the accessories of his robes wedging painfully into your skin but it only fuels you more. His large, burning hand settles against the back of your neck, holding you to him. Biting back a snarl, you try to wiggle your way free but his fingers dig in. Firm, unyielding, steadying; forcing a small gasp from you despite your best effort to hold it back.
You let everything flow outwards, biting down on his bottom lip greedily, and he groans loudly at the back of his throat—a deep, appreciative sound—that almost makes you purr in delight. All that control, all those guards, and you tore through them like tissue paper.
The taste of him mingles on your tongue, his nose nudging against your cheek when he deepens the kiss again, exploring and searching but with such desperation, it’s like he’s trying to drown himself in the kiss. In you.
Your lips tingle and feel partially numb by the time you finally part, breathing hard. Heat creeps up your neck and simmers in your gut while you continue holding onto him. The chain around your neck lays forgotten, both of the Elder’s arms locked firmly around you instead.  
Perhaps this is a kiss you should have shared years ago. That night by the fire you came dangerously close to taking this path. Claiming a lot more than just a kiss from him when he outright admitted that he would have made you his. A kiss that could have started something beautiful. It’s tainted now by the uncertainty of your shared future but you don’t point that out, only waiting for his reaction.
“Ya amar,” he breathes near reverent, his voice throaty, and gaze wild. He tries to leash his desire but you can still taste it, and with how thoroughly you kissed him, you have no doubt that he can say the same for you. “Why?”
“This is what you want,” you tell him, hushed words that brush against his lips as intimately as your lips have moments prior. “It’s what you always wanted.”  
He grips one side of your face, reminding you too much of someone you can’t afford to think of right now, and he shakes his head once.
“No,” he murmurs but the way he holds onto you betrays him as do his eyes that keep flickering back towards your lips. “What I always wanted was an equal,” he pauses for a beat, squinting at you like he’s taking you in with new eyes, like you’re a marvel to behold. “And you have become exactly that, haven’t you, my viper?”
Once you would have denied it, shielded away from saying anything on the matter. Once you simply won’t have believed it. But now there is nothing holding you back anymore.
In that freedom, you have unearthed a simple truth.
“Yes.”
His eyes flutter shut at your confirmation, and you hate the subtle glimmer of relief, even wonderment, you see creasing his expression. Like he’s waited his whole life for someone to say that.
“Three months,” he utters quietly like he doesn't want to disturb the moment. “Then you will return to me.”
“I always do.”
His grip on you constricts before loosening, lingering and reluctant to let go but he does eventually, his digits sliding away from the curve of your waist and neck.
You don’t bother asking how many rules you broke with this kiss.
You both got what you wanted.
“Your tent awaits you,” he prompts quietly, still drilling holes into you. “Rest before your journey, viper. We will see each other soon.”
You couldn’t run even if you wanted to or tried—neither of which you do. Too late for that now.
You dip your head in a small bow, but his fingers tap under your chin the moment you do, guiding your face upwards.
“Everyone but you.”
Then he pulls away, his thumb fluttering briefly over your bottom lip, and sits himself down on his throne, folding his arms and legs alike.
The perfect picture of a powerful, controlled ruler. Enigmatic and captivating.
Cruel as he is kind.
The Terrible Sultan, you can’t quite help your fleeting thought. Which makes you wonder if that, then, makes you his Golden Empress.
You don’t linger on that thought though, that connection that lives between you. Pivoting on your heels, you head towards the exit of the tent, feeling his eyes lingering on you the entire way.
Your mouth still burns but you ignore it.
Your expression slackens the moment your back is to him, coldness spreading through you as you step into the blazing desert sun.
E4 E5.
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The roar inside your head is overpowering.
So much so that all you can do is sit slumped beside your old cot. You hadn’t quite made to it, instead half-collapsing beside it. Your folded knees partially obscure your sight as you stare blankly ahead but you can’t bring yourself to move. 
Instead, you work on glueing together that controlled calm the very man you just talked with taught you. 
Your mind doesn’t allow you rest though. Every wall of control and discipline you’ve ever learned from every influential person in your life dissolves in face of the blistering furnace that is your raging heart. 
A collection of voices scream at you inside your head, and it takes a while to be able to comprehend what one singular voice that sounds suspiciously like Winston is demanding. 
What have you done?
And all you can think in response to that is a tiny and uncertain, What I had to.
Lacing your fingers, you push them between your thighs, sucking in deep, near painful breaths. 
You don’t have time for this. No time for self-pity. There’s…
There’s too much to do. 
Yet all you want to do is sit here for the rest of your days and never move. 
You lick your lips, wetting them, and feel another torrent of emotions batter against your self-control. 
The taste of him is still in your mouth. 
You haven’t kissed anyone on the lips in five years. Not since that night on your birthday when you kissed John. The last time you ever laid your mouth on someone else in general…
A comforting memory slips through the chaos; wispy and balmy, like an embrace. A memory of heat enveloping you, familiar cologne, and dark curly hair. Santino’s small, drunken smile when you pressed a kiss against his forehead, your fingers cupping his face. 
The way he had held you to him around the waist, making you feel unfairly safe, cared for. 
You never did tell Santino about his whispered words at Naples. What he confessed to you between the shadowed walls of his bedroom. Back then, a large part of you still refused to believe it—believe him. Had chalked it up to nothing more than a drunken moment of sentimentality. But that’s no longer the case. You know better than that now. 
Three months will have to be enough to…
To say goodbye. 
Clinging to that memory—and the understanding that you don’t have time to waste—you rise to your feet. For what feels like a thousandth time, teeth gritted and jaw set, you still stand despite the knock. 
Your tent hasn’t changed much. Some things are in a different place to where you left them but the knowledge that it’s been waiting for you all this time is like a sledgehammer to the chest. 
Soon, if things come to pass, it will be your home permanently. 
You start with changing and washing up, followed by applying the salve you found in a small, ceramic pot onto your skin.
For the burns, the note left on your pillow beside the pot read. You didn’t need to ask questions about its origins. You know that penmanship as well as your own after spending endless months studying his research. 
The Elder has once again thought of everything. 
The salve is like a soothing, cool caress across your burned, dry skin and the relief is, once again, immediate. A part of you wonders if there will ever come a day when his genius doesn’t surprise and intrigue you. 
Food is harder. Your stomach still churns, and despite your best attempts to quell the sensation of queasiness, it doesn’t pass. 
You force some broth down despite that, chewing everything in front of you on automatic. Made with a loving hand and great care guarantees that the food is delicious yet you taste none of it. 
It’s quiet. 
The roar inside your mind has quietened. 
Now everything feels cold and far away despite the heat dampening the back of your neck already. The shock has worn off, leaving only throbbing absence behind. 
A commotion sounds outside your tent and your head snaps to the sound. A second later the flap parts and a familiar, dark spectre of a man walks inside, his eyes already locked onto you. 
“John.”
You jump to your feet at the sight of him, moving towards him in hurried steps. Saad slinks inside behind John and you halt at the sight of his looming frame, your eyes narrowing. So that’s where he’s been. No doubt watching over the deadliest assassin alive to make sure he doesn’t cause problems. 
John looks relieved to see you, his expression easing as he takes in your new attire. Previously severe contours of his features relax and his chin dips. 
“V.”
He always manages to pack so much into so little. It’s like the acknowledgement alone asks a hundred questions. 
Are you okay? 
Are you hurt?
What happened?
Though you want to ask him those same questions yourself. He looks terrible. His treatment, clearly, while not awful has not been as hospitable as your own. 
“Saad,” you address the man, nodding your head towards him. Much like the Elder, he hasn’t changed much. A new scar clips the left side of his chin but the rest of him remains the same. From his critical stare, crooked nose, and dark skin. “It’s good to see you again.”
He doesn’t smile and his expression doesn’t lighten at your words. You didn’t expect it to, either. 
“Viper,” he says so bluntly you blink and even John inclines his body towards the man, peering at him from the corner of his eye. “Finally back where you belong.”
Your mouth goes dry. 
“I’m going back to New York,” you inform him, jutting your chin. “So I’m afraid this is a brief visit only.”
Those pitch-black eyes study you for several moments and you can’t quite tell what’s going on behind those empty depths. 
“You have ten minutes,” he states briskly, his voice still flat and accent gruff. “Then I am to escort Mr Wick to his transport. Your presence has been requested by the Elder before your departure.” 
You straighten at that. John is much the same, his shoulders curving backwards. Those words are also when you notice that John is in a fresh, black suit. 
“Is there a problem?” you pose coolly, but your old sparring partner only watches you both with palpable distrust.
He glares at you for a beat, still deadly silent, before turning away from you both. “Ten minutes,” he grunts, and then he’s gone, the flap swishing in his wake while you listen to his retreating footsteps. 
“V, what happened?” John asks the moment Saad’s footsteps can no longer be heard. “He told me he saw you already.” 
He. The Elder. 
Dropping your head in a nod, you turn away from the man behind you, glancing briefly at your shaking fingers. You squeeze them painfully, pressing them against your chest instead, and focus. 
I can do this. 
“We came to an agreement,” you say swiftly, keeping your tone light, and glance at him over your shoulder. Your hand lowers from your chest at the look on his face. John looks confused. Unconvinced. “My Excommunicado will be lifted once I return to New York. You?”
You knew from the moment the deal was made that telling John would not be wise. You know the man inside this tent. His actions with Santino have proven to you that despite what you might say or do, it won’t change his mind. When it comes to push or shove, John will always shove. And he will shove with enough force to crush the opposition completely. 
His reaction to learning that you have to go back in three months would only land him in deeper trouble. Usually, you would expect him to maintain his ironlike composure. Very little could ever move John in the first place, especially towards anything rash. But that desperate gleam in his eyes when he told you that he will make up for his mistakes keeps constantly jumping to mind. 
You don’t trust John not to do something drastic right now. 
He doesn’t respond to your inquiry at first. Which gives you plenty of time to notice the sheen of pain exuding from him. You slant your body back towards him when you do, and take several steps closer.
“What’s wrong?” 
Still, he says nothing. 
You’re about to demand answers but he simply lifts his hand in the air between you. 
And you suck in a deep breath at the sight of his missing ring finger. 
The void is glaring and the finger that was once home for a golden wedding band is gone. As is the ring. 
“He wanted to see my conviction to the Table and told me to cut my finger in a show of fealty,” he explains lowly, his voice and expression worn. “I will be bound to it and remember through death after I complete my task. That was his will and my price to pay for survival.”
It’s so easy, you think in a dazed rush, to forget exactly what the Elder is capable of. He got the deadliest assassin in the world to mutilate himself as a punishment. You would wager he didn’t even threaten—he didn’t need to. 
It makes you painfully aware of what could have happened to you if you didn’t have that history with him. If he didn’t look at you with all that hidden emotion. If you were just a girl who broke his rules. What would have become of you then? Would you have lost a finger as well? Your whole hand? 
Would you have been just another casualty to be stomped out? Removed like a tumour because you didn’t abide. 
Suddenly you feel sick all over again. 
Suddenly all you want—
Your arms wrap around him and you squeeze the powerful frame of John’s body to you. He seems to deflate, unwind and soften, his arms wrapping tightly around you in return. 
“I’m sorry.”
Because you’re still angry at him, still bitter about all he’s done, but you care about him despite that, and know how deeply this would have hurt. Physical injury aside, it’s the loss of his ring that would have stung the deepest. 
John adores Helen still, loves her deeply. 
It’s not something that can fade so easily despite death. 
You felt panicked at the mere prospect of the Elder taking the silver chain around your neck. How did John feel having to lose his finger and his final sign of dedication to the woman he loves? 
But, it seems, that you have both gotten what you had coming. 
He, too, will be bound to the Table now. In a different way than you but bound all the same. This desperate, bloody fight to be free and you are both back exactly where you started. 
John’s face presses into you, savouring the contact, and you release him after another minute. It isn’t just him that needed this. 
“I have to tell you something,” he says the moment you pull back. 
The morose curve of his mouth chills you at once. Comfort, however fleeting, has now left the air between you. 
“What is it?”
“It’s...”
John stares at you for a while. An internal war rages behind his dark eyes and your confusion mounts at his hesitancy. Something is stuck behind his teeth and your stomach sinks the longer the battle goes on inside him.
“It’s about Cassian,” he eventually settles on.
Your brows draw together, caught off guard. Analysing his features closely, you wait to see if he will expand on that but as always John limits himself. He only peers at you but the regret you find lingering in the air around him unsettles you further. 
“What about him?”
He still looks torn and reluctant when his lips part, “After we parted. He found me,” he says and your shoulders lift with your forceful inhale. Understanding blooms steadily with every word. “He wanted revenge. For Gianna.”
The air inside the tent is blistering but you feel it cool by several degrees at those words. 
You had sworn an oath to Gianna that you will make sure her family name survives beyond her. Now you wear the very ring she and Santino have been struggling to earn their entire lives. 
Even worse were Cassian’s parting words to you that still haunt you. 
But if we ever meet again. I will kill you myself. 
Your mentor and friend. A brother you would have loved to have had. 
You could drill John about what happened while you were dealing with Lucien. You could accuse him of more wrongdoings and damage. Demand to know why he didn’t tell you sooner. Scorn him. Hate him.
But instead, you turn away, and let only one question slip free, the only one that matters, “Is he still alive?”
He answers you honestly.
“I don’t know.”
His voice is thick with muted remorse and you nod your head in acceptance of that honesty. You don’t say anything in return, still staring at your cot. Focus on the pattern of your old blanket.  
You feel it bubbling in the air between you and speak up before he can.
“Don’t apologise,” you order but it’s empty of fury. You just sound weary. So very weary. “I understand. I just…”
Your eyes slip shut. He was only trying to keep himself alive. It’s just survival. But it still hurts. In that moment, the urge to give up is near overpowering. It digs deep between your shoulder blades and straight into your heart but you shake it off.
You’re not getting out of this. There’s no hope for you now. You know how this ends. 
You almost recoil at Kishi’s voice filtering from the deepest recesses of your mind. 
No. There’s still hope. That’s exactly why you can’t give up. Because there is still hope. 
“Wish it didn’t have to be this way?”
John’s soft inquiry makes you flinch, snapping you to the present. Your eyes return to him and you examine him for a moment, digesting his words. 
“Yes,” you mumble in agreement, your sadness no doubt palpable. “Yes, I do.”
John lowers his head, a few strands of his raven hair tickling his cheek when he does. “Do you ever wonder…”
He stares at the empty space where his finger should be, flexing the remaining ones experimentally. You wait for him to continue but can tell from one look that he’s lost in his head, thinking hard about something. 
“Do I wonder what?” 
John’s lips part, then press shut again. His breaths are haggard, slow. 
“What might have happened had I never pushed you back? Never left.”
You’re not sure what to do with his curiosity. You’re not even sure how you feel about it.  
“I used to. Often,” you admit after several minutes of thought. Because what do you have left to hide? Now, perhaps, you can be as open as you wish to be, say everything because it’s not like— “Then I realised there was no point to it because you weren’t coming back,” you tell him and chuckle weakly, adding an ironic, “We’re each masters of our own fate.”
Shuffling your feet, you venture closer towards him, and lift your face to his, taking his hand into your own. His knuckles, much like your own, are bruised and swollen. His are worse than yours, however, and with that in mind, you lead him towards your cot. You reach into the still open ointment pot and gather some, rubbing your fingers briefly to warm the salve. 
Slowly, you drag your fingertips gently over his knuckles. It won’t be as effective as it is for burns but chamomile, echinacea and ginseng inside the salve should still help with healing and soothing the pain. 
“You always had the right to choose, John,” you say quietly, frankly, as you work to apply the salve on his other hand as well. He’s so still you’re not sure if he’s breathing. “The right to happiness. I understand that now. It’s always been your right,” you continue, a touch sadder, and your eyes skip upwards to rest on his face. His stare is gentle, his mouth parted while he peers at you. “I’m just sorry that you had to lose it. But to answer your question. No. Not anymore. It’s been a long time. We’re different people now.”
You finish applying the salve and release your grip but his fingers tighten around yours before you can.
“Maybe that’s a good thing,” he says, his words hushed. 
Your search his face again. Wonder what the future will hold for you both. “Yeah, maybe it is.”
A rustle sounds behind you and you turn just as Saad steps back into the tent, his features still rigid with displeasure. 
“Come with me, Mr Wick,” he instructs sternly and inclines his head in your direction. “The Elder awaits you.”
Grounding your jaw, you offer the assassin beside you a calm, “I’ll see you back at the Continental.”
John turns back towards you. He doesn’t look particularly thrilled at your words, a question hanging in the air around him. “Are you sure?”
“Yes,” you say, unfazed. You pat his arm once as you pass; an old, routine gesture you haven’t done in years. “Tell Winston to get my favourite ready. He’ll know the one.”
You brush past them both, chin slanted at a higher angle. It’s late afternoon by now with the sun starting to dip towards the dunes. The air is still sweltering despite that, and a robed man waiting outside the tent gestures mutely in the direction he wants you to head in. 
You find the Elder at the edge of the camp, his presence a beacon that draws attention effortlessly. 
You pause at the sight of him, your shoes sinking into the golden sand beneath. He stares out towards the desert like you’ve seen him do a thousand times, and you wonder if he’s thinking about what you asked him years ago. Another ordinary night by the fire over your shared meal. 
Why not leave again? Why live in a desert? 
It is my duty. 
So you’re a prisoner of your own status? That seems lonely. 
And with his gaze focused on the fire instead of you, he had given you a simple yet serene response, Not anymore. 
Swallowing thickly, you stand there unmoving, watching him for a while. Something tells you that he’s as aware of you as you are of him. 
Loneliness is not unfamiliar to you. It’s a close companion. Has been for years. 
But you’ve found an escape. People to call your own. A sense of belonging.
He hasn’t. 
“It is peaceful here,” he speaks up suddenly, startling you. “Even as a boy, I loved the desert despite its cruelty. I have grown up appreciating its deadly beauty. Have learned to respect it and admire it.”
“Nothing about death is beautiful.”
A brief chuckle flows through the air and he turns to face you, his expression open, his stare narrowed but inquisitive as always. His laced fingers rest against his chest.  
“Your mind has been sorely missed, viper.”
The longing in those words brushes against your skin and mouth; an invisible kiss, an appreciation. 
You imagine that will change one day soon. 
Though it would be a lie to say that you, too, have not missed your discussions. The way you could submerge yourself in conversations with him completely. Lose yourself in his mind and the challenge he constantly posed. 
“You wished to see me.”
Your words sound lifeless even to your own ears and his expression drops. He strolls closer while you stand rooted in your spot. Something is different about him now. He’s missing that edge he had when he saw you earlier. That desperation. Desire. Near darkness. 
He’s more controlled now. At ease. Back to the man you knew. Earlier he gave into his desire freely, and you suspect it was only due to long years separating you. 
“I’m tempted to come with you,” he divulges quietly, like sharing one more secret, and a shiver tears down your spine at those words. He pauses, exhaling, and twists his ring on his finger for seemingly a hundredth time. You didn’t realise earlier how habitual touching it had become for him. “But I do not wish to take this time away from you. So, ya amar, I present you with this.”
From between the folds of his extravagant robes materialises a golden dagger. Your breaths grow shaky before you force them back into a steady rhythm, lifting your eyes to his. 
“It’s the same one,” you say weakly, your tone questioning. “From before.”
The Elder nods and holds out the dagger in the palm of his hand. It’s the same one he tried to give to you during your first stay here, after your sparring session.   
Same stunning, elegant design laced with gold around the handle. Black sheath edged by crusted golden detail as well. 
“Each of my disciples receives a weapon from me personally upon their initiation,” he tells you, his voice soft and melodic, always happy to sate your curiosity. “This one...is special to me,” his voice lowers, a glimmer passing through his eyes that’s gone too soon to decipher. “It is not official yet but I had hoped that one day it will serve you better than it has me.”
He waits for you to take it but you hesitate, staring at it. Your hand hovers over it, outlining the shape of it with your nail. 
You can still taste him. Like he’s rooted himself inside you now. 
“You told me that you understood me,” you begin cautiously, your voice equally as low. “Understood the vengeance that drove me. How?”
The Elder examines you closely. A pregnant pause stretches between you and you begin to think he will never respond before he finally reaches out. He grasps your hand in his, turning it till your palm faces the sky, and places the dagger deliberately into it. Watching you keenly, he carefully folds your fingers around it, not releasing your hand even when he’s done. 
A faint whisper passes his full lips—and you recognise Darija even if you don’t understand it—but it strikes you as…sad. Plagued with some nameless darkness. 
“One day,” he starts huskily, now in accented English, and you can’t quite read his expression or tone. But it’s some bizarre mix you’ve never seen before. A strain and a shadow all at once while he looks you over. “If you still wish it, I will tell you everything.”
The weight and the finality behind that word makes you shift, uneasy. You’re not sure if there will even be tomorrow—much less one day. 
But before you can voice that, the Elder lifts your joined hands, pressing his mouth gingerly against your skin; a fleeting flutter that warms the flesh. 
“Let this be a token of our shared promise to one another.”
He takes one last look at you, his dark gaze inscrutable, and then you’re left alone with only setting sun for company. 
The dagger in your hand feels like an anchor, and you tip your head backwards, gazing up at the expanse of the sky above. 
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The subway doors hiss open and you lift your head, stepping out onto the platform with other passengers. You’ve spent the majority of the journey here staring at the soles of your shoes, your mind splintering in a thousand directions.
There’s too much to do with time so limited.
Your return to New York had been by air. The Elder’s decision, taking into consideration how you felt about water travel.
It’s funny how you didn’t even need to voice such a thing for him to understand it. For him to make sure that the journey back is as painless as possible.
You’re not sure how John travelled but he did leave first, meaning he should be back in New York already. Until you arrive at the Continental, however, you have no way of knowing for sure.
The fierceness with which you’ve missed your home makes your shoulders lock as you cut through the bustling crowd. It should be said that Grand Central is always busy and overflowing with noise. Today is no exception to that. But you’re still a person at the very top of the Wanted list, so you keep your eyes peeled.
Instinctually, you scan the flow of the crowd around you. Strain every sense. Employ everything you’ve learned from some of the best in this world.
Step by step, turn by turn, staircase by staircase.
This time, he doesn’t catch you off guard.
The mob of people flows around you like a coursing river, hiding you both as you jerk to a mutual stop.
The grip on your wrist is unyielding, painful. The sharpened metal between your fingers trembles under the strain of that grip, and your expression mangles with fury. Acidic, poisonous emotion bubbles up to the surface and you don’t bother hiding it.
The man before you smiles at that—a slight but lovely thing—every micro-expression laced with fine malice.
“Hello, Lucien.”
You stand close enough to be touching, his thin frame still managing to cover your own. Your jaw has become a rigid mass as you glare up at him with open hostility.
“There you are, snakey,” he hums pleasantly, his thin mouth transforming into a slow, chilling smile. You try to push the blade you’re holding into his gut but his numbing grip remains. “I’ve been waiting for you to return. Has he missed you much?”
A couple of friends pass right by you, laughing loudly, and you both jerk again; limbs locking and muscle straining further. Neither of you manages to gain more edge on the other though and Lucien’s smile stretches further.
“And I knew you would find me,” you snarl coldly, your eyes narrowing into slits. “I wanted you to find me.”
Knocking his knee with your own, you swipe another blade free and aim it at him. Lucien pushes himself into you in reply, wrapping his arm around yours and halting you in your tracks. The blade scratches against the sleeve of his black jacket, cutting into it, but it doesn’t break skin past that. He yanks you closer, your bodies pressing against each other. You’re both practically embracing. Your limbs a joined, trembling mass from the sheer friction between you.
It’s a deadlock and you’re too evenly matched.
You’ve been waiting for this chance. For the chance to return the slight that was taking you and wasting precious hours for you over a week ago. Now that you know Santino’s choice is you—that you could have avoided this whole mess in the first place had you just had enough time to talk with him—it only makes you more furious.
You’ve been waiting for Lucien to catch up with you.
This time, however, he’s not the hunter, catching unsuspecting prey.
Baring your teeth, you snarl, wrenching yourself back—
And freeze.
Lucien’s coat parts and this close up a blinking red light catches your eye. As does the beeping your ears hadn’t previously picked up with all the noise.
Lucien’s smile turns downright predatory.
“All these sweet little angels...” he remarks in a sing-song voice, pointedly looking around the crowd, his accent just a little more notable. “Ready to watch them all burn?”
A portable bomb.
You should have known.
There’s no doubt enough packed in it to blow half the building, if not more. He would likely delight in the idea of the carnage even he’s not alive to see it himself.
Your features creasing at that thought, you demand an incredulous, “You would kill yourself just to see me die?”
“I’m already dead,” he replies blankly, the tilt of his voice emotionless. “After all I’ve done, it’s not about survival anymore. It’s about me....and you. And one last dance between us.”
You’re not going to play his games. Despite the confusion his words birth, you only allow a chilly, tepid smile to grace your face. Mocking him openly.
“Then catch me if you can.”
You sweep your foot under his legs. Swift and brutal. Lucien doesn’t fall but he does stumble half-a-step back, and you rip yourself out of his grip, dashing through the throng of people.
You’re not running blindly.
He enjoys the chase and you know he will follow but it’s not fear or desperation leading you this time.
People curse and holler as you shove them out of your way, throwing a few purposely in Lucien’s path. You don’t slow down to check if he’s following.
Every trained instinct in your body is screaming at you that he is.
You should have known he would try to use the people at the station against you. Use your close proximity to each other against you too. He’s learned of the dangers you pose at close combat.
But he’s not the only one to have learned something from your previous encounters.
Focused entirely on your rapidly forming plan, you tear out of Grand Central, the cool air of New York greeting you like an old friend.
Streets blur around you and your heart pumps inside your chest as you round the corner, stumbling. Wind beats against your cheeks and you ignore your harsh breaths, leading Lucien deeper into the heart of the city.
And it’s not his city.
You know every nook and cranny of this concrete anthill.
Skidding and stumbling, you throw yourself behind a building wall, pressing your back against it.
Your lungs quiver, heart pumping, and throat aching from the outright sprint you’ve just done.
Lucien should assume the obvious.
That you’re leading him back to the Continental at neck-breaking speed. As you did once before. And you are but not just yet. There’s something you have to handle first.
It takes no longer than ten seconds for the commotion to explode from the direction you just came from. Just as expected.
Lucien’s pounding footsteps reach your ears and your arch your back, readying yourself.
A smear of golden hair enters your vision and you throw yourself at him, slashing at his side.
No wires attached to the bomb that you saw. The Lovers are too sophisticated for anything as inelegant and rudimentary as that. Which makes this bomb either remotely detonatable or Lucien has other means by which to set it off.
Which then means that all you need to do is to rip that portion of his coat off him.
You’re not about to lead him back to your home with a bomb on him.
Lucien crashes onto the concrete sidewalk heavily, you on top of him. His knee drives into your gut and you wince, your fingers tangling into his jacket so he doesn’t slip out of your grip. You manage to hold on, hacking against the coarse material wildly. His features contort, realisation as to what you’re trying to do sinking in.
He throws a punch at you but you duck, ignoring his fingers when they sink into your hair, trying to yank you off him. People around you scream as you roll across the concrete, scattering the moment they realise you’re armed.
You have no intention of killing Lucien outright.
He deserves to reap the consequences of his actions just like the rest of you. If there’s anyone who deserves to be punished for all of this, it’s him. And you will see to it. Lead him back to the Continental and trap him inside like a rat in a maze.  
See what the Black Dragon does when you offer their little pet as a sacrificial lamb for the High Table.
He yanks on your hair but you swipe upwards, scratching your blade against his skin and he barks a laugh. Few droplets of blood slide down his porcelain skin and you stumble back, staggering onto your feet.
Lucien’s jacket is in tatters and he grabs it, yanking it off himself, and throws it carelessly to one side. You tense when it hits the ground but nothing happens. You’re not quite sure if it’s just that durable or if it was a fake-out—both seem equally as likely. “You’re no fun,” he pouts, watching his hand curiously. Ruby droplets well where you have torn into his skin, and he swipes his tongue across the skin lazily, unconcerned. “But fair enough.”
“You and me,” you grit out, glaring down at him as you back up, rolling the blade between your digits with expert ease. He stretches to his full height, too, towering, cracking his neck as he does so. “Let’s dance.”
You peel away, him a second behind you. You know how fast he is and pump your legs till the muscles in your thighs burn from exertion.
You’re surprised he’s not trying to shoot you like last time but maybe that’s the point. He doesn’t want a quick death for you just like you don’t want to kill him till he’s been punished.
Night blurs around you and your eyes narrow in concentration, keeping ahead but just barely. You can hear him right behind you, practically breathing down your neck.
Motorcycles suddenly rev behind you but you don’t dare to risk turning around to check. There’s more than one engine. Which doesn’t bode well for you.
Leaping down the stairwell, you cut through an underground pass. The tunnel amplifies every sound and you hear Lucien’s pounding footsteps behind you. He’s gaining on you.
Sweat clings to the back of your neck, your cheeks stinging from heat and the cold alike.
You take three steps at a time, jumping up the staircase on the other side of the tunnel in a manner of seconds. It takes several moments before motorcycles sound from behind you again—they clearly know the route enough to know about the shortcuts—but you don’t let it shatter your concentration.
The staircase of the Continental appears in your vision, so dear and welcoming—
A weight slams into you from behind and you wince as you both roll across the ground; a wild tangle of limbs.
Scrambling, you punch him right across the jaw before he can get a solid grip on you. Your knuckles twinge with pain but it barely registers. Lucien’s head snaps to the side but he manages to grab your wrists, pinning them to the ground, before you can yank a blade loose.
You drive your knee into his ribs. Once, twice.
Lucien takes it like he can hardly feel it. Teeth gleaming, bared. His grip tightens on you again—there will be bruises there tomorrow without a doubt—and you roll in a mangled mess once more. Two animals snapping their teeth at each other. The motorcycles draw closer down the street and you squirm when he tries to pin you down again. For being so thin, his strength is impressive. Worrying.
He wants to play games. But you’re far, far more furious than he is.
Your head cracks against his forehead, momentarily blinding and deafening you. Lucien falls back. Wobbling, you do the same. Everything is static noise—one moment, two, then you force yourself to move. Vision swimming, you kick at his abdomen blindly. There’s contact and rolling onto your stomach, you hurriedly scramble onto your feet.
A roar of engines hums through the night air, closing in, and you leap onto the stone stairs ahead of you, gripping onto the concrete.
Safe haven. Home.
Your head slants to look behind you; a victorious, vicious smile spreading across your face even though your forehead hums with numbing pain.
Lucien approaches slowly, a hunter on a prowl. His slick back hair is in a disarray. Flecks of his own blood splattered across his face.
He looks murderous despite the deformed smile still splintering his mouth.
Motorcycles come to a stop behind him and you recognise those dark uniforms anywhere. Black Dragon’s men—just as you suspected.
You rise to your feet, deliberate but cautious, taking count of the men present. Foot soldiers are hardly a reason for concern. A certain blonde with his raging stare most certainly is though.
“No one interferes,” Lucien orders, directing his words at the men behind him. “This is between me and—”
“Us.”
Your heart stills for a second before exploding in a wild flutter inside your chest.
You don’t turn around but hear the hotel door behind you crack open, followed by footsteps.
Lucien’s expression morphs with cold viciousness in the face of the new company.
Dario and Julian walk past you first, coming to a stop at the foot of the stairs, effectively blocking Lucien’s path. The Sharpshooter has his twin pistols gripped firmly in each hand, his usually friendly demeanour absent. Only the Camorra’s best stares back; focused and grim. Dario is no better with his arms folding over his broad chest the moment he halts, seemingly only amplifying his domineering presence. He reminds you of a growling grizzly bear, waiting for the slightest of provocations.
Step comes to a standstill beside you, nudging you with his elbow, and you dare to momentarily look away from Lucien to see his grinning face. He wiggles his eyebrows, his round sunglasses still on his face before he leaps down the last several steps. He lands noisily just behind Julian, laughing softly under his breath.
“Whatever issue you have with our boss,” Dario speaks solemnly, his usually warm, rumbling voice void of those things. “We would caution you to forget about it.”
“Get out of my way,” Lucien hisses lowly, his lips barely moving. “This doesn’t concern you.”
Julian raises his pistols at blinding speed at those words, pointing them directly at Lucien’s face. The Dragon’s men unholster their weapons in response but despite being outnumbered at least one to two, the Elites don’t appear concerned.
You’re not sure if you’re still breathing.
“We would rather not kill you,” Step chirps happily, leaning his elbow on Julian’s shoulder, before adding a downright chilling, “But we will.”
Lucien’s expression smoothens, growing remote in its emptiness. His hollow stare drags up till it latches onto you—cold and unforgiving, two black holes.
“You know you can’t hide from me, viper,” he whispers yet his low, throaty words carry through the night air all the same. The Elites don’t so much as blink; an impenetrable wall of defence. “We have unfinished business, you and I.”
“Were they not clear enough for you, huh?”
Your eyes nearly close when the final pair of footsteps comes to a stop beside you. Your attention doesn’t waver but you hear the click of a lighter beside you. It’s followed a second later by a soft crinkle of a smouldering cigarette as Hector draws a deep, tobacco-induced breath into his lungs.
“She’s our boss,” he declares roughly and you feel your throat close up at his frank statement. “Which means that you really don’t want to start this,” a pointed pause, and another hard inhale of a cigarette before, “So why don’t you go and blow a load into your girlfriend and stop wasting our damn time.”
The atmosphere thickens with tension at Hector’s crass words but you don’t look away from Lucien.
The blonde slants his head, curious. He regards Hector like a bug; an odd, unusual being that makes no sense to him. Like his words are spoken in a foreign language the assassin doesn’t quite comprehend.
“Boss,” Lucien echoes softly, making a fine mockery of the word, as he takes a few deliberate steps closer. “Is that suppose to mean something to me?”
The threat in his lovely voice snaps Julian’s hand to one side, the barrel of his gleaming silver pistol pressing into Lucien’s temple just as the tall man places his foot on the Continental staircase.  
“Julian, don’t!” you warm loudly and the Sharpshooter freezes at your command. “It’s what he wants,” you add bitterly, turning your stare towards the blonde who appears completely unconcerned to have a fully loaded weapon digging into his head.
His smug smile stretches, quivering at the corners, his stare almost playful, goading.
Julian obeys, his arm lowering slightly but his pistol remains trailed on the French assassin. The man in question takes his time, deliberately climbing one step at the time, and Hector lowers his smouldering cigarette. He’s on your right, standing between you and Lucien but the blonde hardly seems to notice that when he comes to a halt, still watching you intently.
“Yeah, it really should,” Hector says deliberately, his voice dipping towards seriousness and warning.
Dario and Step are still watching the Dragon’s men closely while Julian has turned with Lucien, his pistols still locked onto the man. It’s been a long time since you’ve seen the Sharpshooter as anything other than grinning and relaxed.
Lucien drags his gaze away from you at long last, his attention switching to the leader of Elites beside you, and you feel the suffocating tension in the air as they both stare each other down.
“I hold no loyalties to anyone for you to threaten me with fancy titles, dog,” the blonde remarks, his voice light, almost friendly, his attention once again returning to you. “But I’ll see you inside, snakey.”
You don’t answer him, choosing to glare right at him and nothing more than that. The lack of reaction seems to dissatisfy him, his lips pressing into a firm, unhappy line. He reaches for you—
Hector grabs his extended hand with near blinding speed, crushing his wrist in an ironlike grip as he jerks Lucien’s hand backwards, holding him back.
Everyone tenses and Dario pulls his own weapons free when the Dragon’s men try to push closer.
“Let me rephrase that,” Hector hisses quietly, his words thick with warning—no boredom or indifference to be found in his voice now. “She’s ours. You so much as lay a hand on her and I’ll cut it off and feed it to you.”
The French assassin grins in return, chuckling, his fist clenched to a point his knuckles strain beneath his pale skin. Hector’s grip only tightens though, the ink of his tattoos highlighted by the lights above.
“You got that?” he stresses viciously. “Or was I being too obtuse, you bleached French fuck.”
He throws Lucien’s arm back at him and the man’s expression sharpens with a savage sort of rage. Aside from his stormy, narrowed stare, it’s near impossible to tell that Lucien is displeased though. His features might as well be cut from marble.
“You remind me of someone I knew once,” Lucien muses, still grinning though it looks no better than a sharpened blade. “He too was an arrogant, blunt tool to be used.”
The blonde hums mockingly, looking Hector up and down.
“Get lost,” he calls out loudly, slanting his head—something so harsh in the motion you half-expect to hear his neck crack—toward the Dragon’s men. “I don’t need you here.”
Confusion follows those words but Lucien only cuts one last look your way before strolling calmly into the hotel.
You’re not going to stop him because he’s exactly where you need him to be. He will stay to try and wait you out. Which is exactly what you want and need. Time.
Biting back a grin, you briefly glance at Hector who meets your inquisitive stare and turns towards the Dragon’s men who look unsure as to what they should do.
“Are you deaf?” he snaps loudly. “Get lost.”
Step moves first, bouncing up the stairs till he’s right in front of you. He parts his arms, waiting for you to show if you’re in the headspace to be touched and…
You wrap your arms around him—near crushing and strong, squeezing his wiry frame to you with all the strength you possess inside your body. The hacker’s arms lock equally as tightly around you despite Hector’s snort.
“We’ve been worried about you, carina,” he mumbles against your cooling neck, and you watch Dragon’s men clearing the entrance of the hotel over his shoulder. “Everything’s gone to hell.”
“We should take this inside,” Dario speaks up, finally lowering his weapons, and Julian does the same though his grip on them doesn’t loosen. “It’s not safe for you out here, V.”
You release Step from your death grip with a nod and a pat on his shoulder. He flashes you a quick smile but it looks strained. They all look tense, grim-faced, and tired. Still deadly though, and focused as always.
Julian opens the glass doors and steps inside, his pistol raised like he expects Lucien to leap at you from the shadows.
The hour is late and the reception area, for once, feels eerily quiet. No Lucien in sight though.
You haven’t even noticed how they’ve positioned themselves around you. Hector is still on your right, Julian at the front and Dario taking the rear while Step’s arm ghosts on your left.
Your throat aches, something coiling inside your heart.
You feel…
Protected. Safe.
It robs you of speech for a solid minute—that realisation.
You’ve lived with them for a year. Ate, trained and bled with them. But it feels different now for some reason you can’t explain.
You’ve grown so used to fighting your battles alone that having someone on your side feels surreal.
Even more surprising is Hector’s compliance. You hadn’t expected him to fall into the role of your temporary right hand so easily. Or to be as open about your position, and his by extension, at your side. You hadn’t even expected him to stand in defence of you, unlike the other three.
But Hector has always valued Camorra above all else. Personal prejudices aside, he will always do his duty. It is, perhaps, the one thing you’ve always admired the most about him. His unfailing loyalty.
If you died now it would only cause further chaos and headaches for him.
Seeing all of them again, however, fills you with such immense relief you can hardly speak.
“Santino?” is the first thing you manage to wheeze out. “Ares? Roberto? How—how are they?”
With each step, you shed your momentarily lapse reminding yourself that this is no time to feel sentimental.
Hector answers you promptly, as would be expected of him, “Princeling woke up several hours ago,” he states calmly and you notice that he no longer has his cigarette. He must have dropped it outside. Despite that, your sensitive nose still catches a whiff of tobacco every time his lips part. “Ares is with him. Roberto is stable.”
You practically stumble to a stop. “He woke up?” you whisper, your voice breathy with fragile hope.
Hector’s stare is critical but lacking his usual irritating superiority. Surprisingly. “Yeah, asked after you,” he reveals bluntly, and you can feel others monitoring your reaction to those words. “He thought Wick killed you.”
Your heart clenches painfully at that.
He got shot in the head and his first worry when he woke up had been you?
But the knowledge that he has regained consciousness, had been coherent enough to even speak, nearly crumbles your self-control again. Relief churning through your veins is immeasurable. Dizzying.
You want to demand a thousand things but instead push yourself to focus, “We have to move him to the penthouse. Immediately.”
One of Hector’s eyebrows arches at that. But it’s Dario that speaks first, “Why?”
You glance between the four of them silently. No one else seems to be around. In the distance, even the reception desk sits empty, and it’s the first time in seven years that you’ve seen it unmanned.
What’s going on? Where is Charon?
“Because she’s not here,” you tell them, still slightly out of breath due to your earlier sprint, and your words soften with bitterness. “The Female Lover. Divide and conquer seems to be the most logical course for them to follow now.”
It would make sense. Split attacks and lay traps. Force your hand with pitting Lucien against you because they no doubt know that Santino is being kept safe between these walls. Put danger right here on your doorstep so you are forced to act.
The Four exchange wary looks and you note them at once.
“We already moved boss,” Julian informs you before you can ask, his strong eyebrows curving and feet shuffling. You can almost hear the grimace in his voice. “Right after the visit from an Adjudicator earlier. We figured it was no longer safe for him to stay since they demanded to see him.”
“Don’t look so surprised, sweetheart,” Hector mutters under his breath, folding his arms with a slight roll of his eyes. “Some of us are actually good at doing our jobs. Removing him from the Table’s direct jurisdiction was the best thing to do at the time.”
“Then where the hell is he?”
Step winces. “The penthouse,” he tells you and immediately lifts his hand in a pacifying manner while your eyes close. “But Flavio and others are with him. He’s protected. He was moved discreetly. No one saw a thing. I was watching all the cameras myself.”
Biting back a sigh, you mull over his words and huff a breath. “Then why are you not with him?”
“Because once Mr Wick arrived here in a rather…loud manner,” Dario begins and your attentions slides to him. “We knew you will not be far behind. With trouble likely on your heels. We had no way of contacting you and splitting up would have drawn too much attention. Step worked entire day trying to pin the Lovers down to one location but they kept popping up all over the city. They’ve been circling.”
So they stayed here to keep enemy eyes pinned on the hotel, giving them time to move Santino in secret.
Sometimes you forget how brilliant they are.
“They were waiting for me to come back,” you assume.
Dario inclines his head, his stare firm, and strong eyebrows curved. “Our duty is to protect you as well, V.”
Your blink at those resolute words, caught off guard.
Step is grinning cheekily but the other two stand with sombre air surrounding them. Hector’s expression is stony but he doesn’t disagree, either.
Before you can thank them or say anything else, a realisation slices through you like a bolt of lightning. A sickly feeling of quicksand gobbles you up in a matter of seconds, and you battle down the urge to kick something.
“Circling,” you repeat numbly, nearly biting your tongue because you already know the answer before you bother continuing. “Anywhere near the penthouse?”
You direct that question at Step and the latter stills, his grin wilting. “Closest ping I got was four blocks out.”
“Fuck.”
Your head slants backwards and you bite out an even more vicious, “Fuck.”
“V?”
Your head drops back and your expression is no doubt unforgiving. “Get to the penthouse right now,” you order, not even bothering to make it sound like a request. “This is their plan. For me to get here so she has the go-ahead to attack while Santino is alone. They’ve been waiting for you to move him. They knew you did. That’s why the male Lover let it go. Why he’s not here right now.”
Lucien is no doubt putting their plan into motion. Dismissing Dragon’s men was about giving you a false sense of security.
“What about you?” Julian wonders quietly though his tone doesn’t lack urgency. Dario already has his phone pressed to his ear, no doubt calling the security at the penthouse.
You want to go.
You…
“I can’t,” you choke out even though it kills you to admit it. “If I go, I lead Lucien and god knows who else straight back to Santino.”
The Lovers are no doubt hoping for that outcome. But you can keep them separated too. Weaken them. It just means trusting the Elites with Santino’s life completely. They will be taking the brunt of Mika’s and the Black Dragon’s attack.
You look towards Hector but find him already gazing at you, his harsh features drawn into a pensive expression. His eyebrows sit contracted into a tight line and his eyes go to Step.
Dario’s muffled murmurs cease then, and he lifts his head, ending the call with a single touch against the glowing screen. “There’s been nothing so far but…”
“Can you isolate any incoming attacks?” Hector demands and Step pulls out his phone the moment those words leave the leader’s mouth, scrolling and tapping rapidly. “Get to the penthouse. Julian call the rest of the men. The ruse is up. Tell everyone to get their asses there right now or I’ll kill them myself. Go.”
It’s a testament to how much they trust each other that they move as one—not questions asked—only pausing monetarily before you, and it takes you a full second to realise that they’re waiting for your approval.
Right. You’re their boss. Even if only temporarily.
You nod twice; shaky and a touch frantic.
“Capo.”
You’re not even sure which one of them says it, or if it’s all of them in unison, but a shiver tingles down your neck all the same.
Hector hesitates, still standing rooted in his spot, his stare probing but he doesn’t make a sound until the hurried footsteps of the other Elites fade.
“You’re planning to go after him.”
It’s a statement, direct and shrewd, and you see no reason to deny it. “Promise me you will kill her,” you insist sternly, your eyes meeting for a charged moment. “Don’t let her touch him.”
Hector strolls past you, his hands in his pockets. “Consider it done,” he shoots back flatly, pausing beside you once again but doesn’t turn towards you. You simply stand shoulder to shoulder in the empty lobby. “Something else is going on here. The Frenchie isn’t the only one you should watch out for. Some bald asshole followed Wick, and this Adjudicator seems a little rule happy and not in a good way,” he concludes pointedly.
“It doesn’t matter,” you respond mildly, your voice vacant and low, distant. “They can’t touch me. No one can now.”
The dagger against your side feels like it’s scorching into your skin.
Hector turns to face you at that but you don’t do the same. His weighty stare digs into your temple for several moments but you ignore it. Expectation hangs heavy in the air between you but you don’t explain yourself further. There is no point.
He scoffs under his breath, managing to sound as dismissive and derisive as always. The nearby heat of his looming frame disappears, his footsteps echoing against the marble as he saunters away.
But the way he had the foresight to move Santino nags at you, as do his actions outside on that staircase only minutes prior.
And—
“Hector?”
His footsteps fade into a stop, and you turn your face towards him.
“What now, sweetheart?” he calls out impatiently, peering at you over his shoulder as well. “Want a back rub with all of that?”
Normally something like that would have angered you, dug under your skin, pissed you off. Now though…
“Thank you.”
He doesn’t outwardly react to your words, not even a twitch of his facial muscles. He only stares at you for a long minute completely silent. You’re not quite sure what to make of that reaction.
“Whatever.”
His back disappears through the door leading outside and you turn back towards the reception desk.
Time to get some answers.
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You hear him before you see him.
The dog leaps at you with a happy bark, his tongue lolling to one side when he lifts his nose eager to give you kisses.
His presence here shocks you but only because you know for a fact that the Continental doesn’t do animal boarding. Everything lately has felt like an avalanche of one thing after another that you haven’t stopped to think about what may or may not have happened to him. Or where he might be staying after John’s home was destroyed.
Despite not seeing him in a few weeks, he seems no less thrilled to see you.
“Hey, Cheeseburger,” you greet with the first genuine smile in a week, your features softening. You bend down to pet him, rubbing behind his ears and he only tries to lick you with more fervour, a happy doggy grin splitting his face. “Have you been good?”
A small bark escapes him, tail wagging so quickly it’s a blur, and your smile grows.
“Miss.”
Your eyes skip ahead, and relief whispers through your chest, an invisible coil loosening when you spot Charon standing ahead of you. As always his posture is bowstring straight, his suit pressed neatly, and eyes watchful over his glasses.
“Charon.”
You’ve missed him. So dearly. Seeing his face is like a much-needed balm against your tattered nerves.
His voice is as low and soothing as always when he offers a cordial, “Welcome back.”
His words might as well be an embrace and your smile wobbles momentarily. There has been a large part of you that was convinced you would never see him or Winston again.
You try not to think about your deal now. About leaving just when you got them back. Right now all that matters is that you’re here.
Still stroking Cheeseburger’s head, you stand back to your feet, ignoring the twinge of discomfort in your muscles when you do.
“It’s good to be back.”
Charon starts approaching you but a voice cuts in before he can say anything else.
“The Vipress.”
Your smile slides off your face when a short, bald man with a fixed smile and a wide-eyed stare appears from behind the concierge.
Hector’s warning springs to mind at once, and your eyes briefly flicker towards Charon whose expression remains impassive. A certain strain—disdain, even—can still be found in his overall bearing, however.  
Charon is not one to dislike people often, and certainly not openly. Though to most he would no doubt appear as detached and professional as always you can tell the difference. You’ve known him for years after all.  
“Do we know each other?” you wonder neutrally, your palm ghosting over a concealed blade despite the no-business rule. Not a scowl or even a whisper of a frown shows but your voice slides into something apathetic all the same.
The man dressed in all black wanders closer. His stance is relaxed, expression friendly, but you see the assessing gleam in his eyes, the brittle—almost mean—edge to his slight grin. It makes you feel like he’s in on some joke you’re missing out on.
Despite being on the shorter side and his near deceptive demeanour, you don’t fail to take count of the precise way he moves—a trained, likely deadly individual, and your attention settles on him like a sharpened blade against his throat.
Though your body language doesn’t outright change, you know he, too, notes the shift in you in those several seconds that pass between him stopping just a little ahead of you.
Cheeseburger licks your fingers—blissfully ignorant of the uneasy atmosphere—and you drag your fingertips over his head tenderly.  
“No,” the man answers shortly, still smiling what he no doubt hopes to be a friendly smile though it hardly is. “But I know of you. Tokyo still remembers your name.”
Your heart stutters for a single second, feeling the slice of those calm, unassuming words. But you can tell from the way his lips flutter just slightly that he chose his words carefully. A deliberate dig and he examines your reaction closely, so you show him nothing.
The man ventures closer yet again, seemingly encouraged by whatever he sees, and extends his gloved hand your way. “But where are my manners? I am Zero.”
His hand hangs in the air between you and Charon’s stare settles on you. He doesn’t interfere though, or comments.
Not taking his hand would be rude but expected. People know of your aversion to touching strangers. However, it would also put you on a backfoot after his previous dig, and the last thing you want is someone that worries even Hector to smell weakness.
With that in mind, you slot your smaller hand into his, your grips equally as constrictive, “Good to meet you,” you say, your voice bland, dropping his hand after another forced twitch of your lips. “Now if you excuse—”
“I was still in training when you killed Kishi of Tokyo,” he declares loudly, freezing you mid-turn, and your eyes meet Charon’s again before you look back at the newcomer. You’re not quite sure what to make of his strange stare or fragmented little smile. “We knew each other. But not much,” he continues, no doubt purposely ignoring your disinterested, borderline hostile stare. “Maybe I should express my gratitude. If it were not for you, I would not be what I am today.”
He even bows his head. Like you’re his comrade. Like you’re one and the same.
Still, you say nothing, and Zero chuckles loudly before it cuts off abruptly. A new gleam glows in his eyes, and it doesn’t surprise you when Charon comes to a stop beside you. The concierge cuts for a silent but foreboding figure all the same.
Zero’s expression twists with amusement upon spotting that silent gesture, and he presses his hand over his chest. “You’ll have to forgive me, I’m a bit—what do they say—a little starstruck,” he apologizes but it feels more like oil on your skin followed by another gleaming smile. “Meeting the John Wick and the Vipress in a span of a single night. Legend of the old and legend of the new. The shadow that hides the snake—that’s what they still say about you two.”
You work hard to not let anything slip. You’ve known about your legacy in Tokyo for some time now—your and John’s both. You did what no one has done before. Escaped. Survived. John slaughtered his way through Kishi’s men to make sure no one ever followed you back.
It didn’t change much in the end. That nightmare of a man—his phantom, at least—still haunts you to this day. It chills the blood in your veins to be standing out here now and be discussing him so openly. Especially with someone who supposedly knew him.
You’re not sure if you’re strong enough to engage with this conversation. There’s only so many ghosts you can handle in such a short span of time.
“I wish to see the manager,” you announce instead, your stare not leaving the assassin before you.
There is a flare of fury at the dismissal but it’s brief, and once it passes, it leaves a man that reminds you of a mannequin—deflated and lacking life, formless like a ghost.
“Sir and Mr Wick are currently meeting in the administrative lounge, Miss,” Charon answers promptly but then adds a deliberate, “The manager, however, has expressed his desire to see you at once upon your return.”
Even if Winston hadn’t, something tells you that Charon would have said that regardless. Like you know him, he knows you. He understands perfectly well how shadows of your past belong there. Rattling them now would be dangerous.
Nodding, you force yourself to keep a polite facade, the assassin receiving a rather forced, “Mr Zero.”
Certainly the best he could hope for. Or should. Still, you feel proud of yourself for managing to contain yourself. For not letting him bait you into action because he no doubt was hoping for a reaction, perhaps even a confrontation. That would be easy, expectant.
Zero doesn’t look pleased about the outcome of the conversation at all. His easy-going, faux adoring demeanour splintering around the edges. The man before you tries to hold the pieces together but you notice the cracks all the same.
Lowering your chin, you raise your palm towards Cheeseburger, “Stay.”
The dog releases a small whine at the order but does as he’s told, sitting back on his hind legs, his ears perked up. That alone almost brings another smile to your face.
Your arm drops back to your side and you offer Charon another look that says a silent keep an eye on him.
Your footsteps echo as you cut through the hallways of the hotel, passing a few faces as you do. Zero doesn’t follow and you’re glad for it—for some reason, a part of you had expected him to.
Throughout your journey, you feel eyes tracking you. No one says anything or moves towards you though. You half expect Lucien to leap at you from every shadowed corner but he’s nowhere to be seen. You want to worry that maybe he truly did leave the hotel and hightailed it for the penthouse but it won’t be logical for him to miss out on this chance.
Lucien’s interest—fixation—with you has always felt deeply personal. More than a simple job or a hit. It never felt like he took as much interest in Santino as he did in you. Certainly surprising considering that from you two, it’s Santino with the biggest power reserve behind him. Enough to crush the Lovers if he came into his power as he now has. You’ve thought about this once before but maybe then you had things wrong.
Despite you being the bigger physical threat, removing Santino first would have been more logical. It would have isolated you. Left you without support.
Lucien never showed much eagerness in Santino’s removal aside from making an occasional threat to rile you up from the start.
Why?
Is it truly just conviction that you are alike? An obsessive there can only be one mentality?
With that thought lodged like a splinter inside your mind, you step into the elevator, shoving the partition roughly with a metallic click.
The elevator jolts when you press the appropriate floor button, falling back against the metal wall on your journey.
Everything is so loud it’s somehow quiet. Or maybe you’ve just gotten better at ignoring it.
It’s a short trip and when the elevator halts you pull the metal partition slowly this time, perking your ears for any unusual sounds.
There’s nothing.
You’ve never liked the administrative lounge much. Unlike the rest of the hotel that’s always oozed an old, rustic charm, this space has always felt cold and clinical on the few, rare occasions you visited Winston up here. Frankly, it’s never been the type of place you enjoyed visiting then, and you don’t suspect that will change any time soon.
The neon laser lights and glass as far as the eye can see. Visually it’s a masterpiece of architecture but it always made you feel uneasy. Like a rat caught in a crystal maze. Being back here now reminds you eerily of the gallery you had to chase John through, nearly losing everyone dear to you in the process.
Grabbing a blade from a secure sown-in compartment inside your coat, you move up the staircase soundlessly.
It doesn’t take long for faint, muffled voices to reach you. Slowing down further, you approach one step at a time. With each step, Winston’s calm baritone becomes clearer. You stop abruptly when his words start registering properly.
“—but you’re having doubts?” he calls out, sounding knowing and in control like usual. “Because you know that she will never forgive you if you do this. Will never let you into her heart again. She’s the only thing you still have left to lose,” he goes on, and your eyes widen when you realise who exactly he’s discussing. What the hell is going on? You know he’s talking to John but… “This is all assuming she can find it in herself to forgive you for your actions in regards to one Santino D’Antonio in the first place.”
You can’t see them from here. You’re above them by at least an entire flight of see-through glass stairs. Shifting your weigh, you move closer, holding your breath and sinking lower towards the ground to not alert them of your presence.
“I understand perfectly well, Johnathan, this is nothing personal,” Winston continues and for once you truly find yourself hating how calm he sounds. You’ve never seen the manager caught off guard. It’s everyone else he outmanoeuvres with expert ease. But personal? What’s personal? “If you feel like you must. Put a bullet through my heart. The High Table has asked me to step down one way or another.”
You almost stumble.
What?
It’s then that a memory springs forward. Of the tent. John’s conflicted expression and his words.
Elder gave you time to say goodbye but you had to make a deal. What if John had to make one too? He mentioned a task; a task he never got time to explain further. Only a vague mention of one.
But he had wanted to, you realise with sinking dread, the moment he saw you, he wanted to.
John’s punishment—his true punishment—is sacrificing his oldest friend in a show of fealty to the Table and killing him.
The lukewarm metal between your digits nearly falls to the ground at that realisation.  
But why—
“The hour?” John’s gruff voice speaks at long last.
A distracted hum, then confirmation, “The hour.”
“You should have killed me when you had the chance,” John says bluntly. “Killed us both.”
You gnash your teeth together, feeling the grind of bone inside your skull as you slink closer, taking it one stair at a time. Unhurried and precise. Just how John himself taught you.
Distantly, you hear Winston agree followed by muted footsteps against the gleaming floor. Is he moving away from John or towards him?
“In the years you’ve been away, Johnathan, I have come to learn that loyalty is a peculiar thing,” the manager muses, his voice thoughtful, but you hear the deliberateness he puts into each word he speaks. There is an odd quietness to his voice though—the type of you’ve only heard a handful of times. “Hard to earn, quick to break,” a long pause supersede those words and you come to a standstill as well, straining your ears. “But not always. It can sometimes be obtained by the most unlikely of individuals during the most unlikely of times.”
You’re not quite sure what exactly John gleans from those words but he does seem to take away something you miss. “You’re not stepping down, are you?”
“No,” Winston states evenly. “I don’t think I am.”
“So it’s war,” John declares, sounding just as bewildered as you feel, and you know it’s a rarity for him to let his emotions slip so easily. But this is… “You’re going to war with the High Table.”
Once you had joked about it. You were left cranky after yet another job for Tarasov, and had come back to the Continental worn after days of dealing with less than hospitable conditions. Winston had listened to your rant like usual.
What if I just killed Tarasov now?
Newspaper and brandy in hand, Winston’s reply had been unamused, You get killed.
Not if you help me. You and I, I bet we could take the Table on.
It was a joke back then. Nothing more than a throwaway, snarky remark you had made as a way to alleviate some pent up stress. A momentarily reprieve from the helplessness you’ve always felt in the face of your circumstances. It’s one of the few things that has helped you stay sane over the years.
It was long before you met the Elder and learned you could kill Tarasov without consequences once the debt was repaid.
It’s only now that you realise that Winston never did give you a response to that offhand statement. Joke or otherwise.
It’s only now that you stupidly realise that the idea of war shouldn’t surprise you at all. That perhaps deep in your bones you always knew there was a possibility of one.
Maybe Winston’s dedication to upholding rules and order always blinded you to the fact that despite that obedience he wasn’t afraid of them.
That which terrifies others—everyone, even you and John—has never affected the manager in the same manner.
He’s not afraid of the High Table. Or to move against them if he sees fit.
“I’ve made my decision. A long time ago now,” Winston remarks, and you edge closer, catching the first glimpse of him through the crack in the stairwell. “Back when I had to watch Charon carry a dying girl through the very halls of this fine establishment. A girl that you left behind. And now, it’s time for you to choose as well.”
Oh.
You’ve always privately considered Winston and Charon to be your family. One you weren’t quite allowed to have but chose for yourself despite how foolishly sentimental it was. A bond that was forged through years of knowing each other. Struggling together. Practically living together.
It never once crossed your mind that it was a feeling returned at least to some degree.
That alone makes you look at the entire conversation you’ve just heard in a new light.
“Choose what?”
Winston stands in front of John, his hand extended towards the assassin. In the manager’s weathered hand—a fine mockery of a week ago when he first declared you both Excommunicado, and even worse, of the Elder offering you the golden dagger at your side—sits a pistol.
The older man gives John a shrewd stare, and if you didn’t know any better you would say that he’s disappointed John is not catching on quicker.
“Oh, but you already know,” he states flatly, moving his hand in a vague motion. “It’s the same choice you’ve been struggling for the last five years now. Between who you are and who you wish to be. You kill me, you sell your soul to the Table.”
All you can see is the back of John’s head, his crop of black hair standing out like a dark spot against the glossy, blue tint of the lounge.
He thinks about Winston’s words for a bit.
“But I also live and remember Helen.”
Once those words might have caused a burn of pain but now all you feel is a nudge of sadness and a joyless sort of understanding. You’ve accepted the fact that there will always be a part of John that will always love Helen.
You’ve just hoped…
“Helen loved you, John. She truly did,” the manager agrees, something just a touch warmer to be heard in his intonation. “And you love her. You only came back because she was taken from you. But she’s also gone and she’s not coming back. You go ahead with this and you lose V forever, and I know that alone is stopping you.”
There is a scathing sort of finality to the last part and John’s slightly lowered head lifts.
“So I guess my question to you, then, is who do you wish to die as?” Winston asks though it does sound like a fine line between an inquiry of genuine curiosity and an authoritative demand. “Baba Yaga. The living nightmare and the last thing so many have seen. The servant of the High Table. Or as a man who was—and likely still is—loved by two wonderful women.”
John doesn’t move or say anything. That heaviness hangs across his shoulders, burdening him with yet another choice.
The problem is the fact that what you told him back at the desert still applies.
You don’t trust his word. You’ve been burned too harshly by recent events to do so.
With that in mind, you drop your guise, walking the remainder of the stairs with deliberate heaviness. Purpose.
Both men turn at the sound of your advancing footsteps. The former’s expression lightens, a clever gleam catching your eye. John looks weary, almost like he’s readying himself for another battle, another storm that is your raging fury.
You have little appetite for that though.
Too much is going on right now. The Elites could be battling against the Female Lover and the Black Dragon’s men right now. You need to find Lucien and figure out a way to keep him here. Inform the High Table. Find out who started this hunt in the first place. Who knows about Chicago.
“Winston.”
A slight smile ghosts over the manager’s face. “Welcome home.”
It hurts.
Because it feels so good to hear him say that. To feel welcome and missed. Even if you know it’s as much about drawing that line in the sand for John—an unspoken You vs Us.
John doesn’t fail to take count of the blade in your hand, neither does Winston.
A suspended kind of silence shrouds you three. If John really thinks that you will let him—
Footsteps.
You all turn in the direction of a tall, graceful figure clad in all black moving briskly down the steps.
The icy blue stare and black, short-cropped hair are all unfamiliar to you.
“Mr Wick and Miss Vipress,” the newcomer greets in a cool and collected manner, gripping a pair of leather gloves in one hand. “It is a pleasure to finally meet you both. I’m an Adjudicator.”
Shit. Of course they are. It makes sense for one to come and adjudicate the hotel after John shot Santino at practically point-blank range inside these very walls.
The hour.
Winston overstepped his position by offering you that hour. By helping you and John out.
Now he’s paying for it.
When neither you nor John say anything in return, their head slants in Winston’s direction, unperturbed. “Have you decided to step down?”
You would think they’re asking if the cookies are ready to come out of the oven. Their voice is as empty as their stare despite the gravity of their question. But the Adjudicators are often cold and distant. Dedicated to upholding the rules of the High Table even more so than the hotel managers are. To expect pity or mercy from one never bodes well.  
Winston greets that indifference by no less bored, “I don’t think I will.”
A quick tilt of their chin—offended, critical—and they turn towards John instead.  
“And you?” they demand, a notable sharpening to their tone. “Will you be pulling a bullet in his head?”
You tense at those words, your body instinctively moving in front of the manager.  
John’s ponderous scrutiny falls on you but you don’t take your attention away from the Adjudicator. Is what Winston said true? Are you really the only thing John still has left to lose?
You’re not sure if—
“No,” he says, quiet but resolute. “I don’t think I will.”
The High Table representative examines you three with a flicker of disbelief as well as irritation. You can’t help but wonder if this is the first time they encountered such blatant dismissal of their authority.
“So be it.”
They turn on their heels creating at least several meters in distance between you. A phone appears in their hand and they dial, bringing the phone to their ear with an effortless air of superiority.
All you manage to catch from where you stand is the very end of the conversation. “The Continental Hotel, New York,” an imposing proclamation followed by swift damnation. “Deconsecrated.”
The Adjudicator spins towards them, approaching leisurely as they gave each of you a measured, speculative look.
“This institution has hereby been deconsecrated,” they state flatly, appraising you all with aloof, disinterested air. Like you have just become less than human in their eyes and nothing more than trash to be taken out. “As such business may now be conducted on Continental grounds. Since you are refusing to step down,” they continue, their tone icy and pointed glaring digging into Winston, then John, “And you are refusing a direct order, your lives are now forfeited.”
Much to your surprise, the Adjudicator’s bright eyes come to rest on you next. “It is my advice to you Miss Vipress that you vacate the premises immediately,” they warn but the words lack much care aside from mild impartiality. “The High Table emissaries will be joining you shortly to see to the removal of your souls from the property,” they add to the two men on either side of you.
The Black Dragon men.
With that, the Adjudicator turns to go but your voice halts them before they take further than a step, “This hotel is my home,” you profess tightly, something slippery and raw in that string of words. An old ache; a new longing. Ironlike, unshakeable conviction shines the brightest though. “If you want it, you will have to take it over my cold, dead body.”
Another tilt of chin that makes you think reptile; coldblooded and dispassionate. “That can be arranged.”
A snarl pulls your lips back. “Can it?” you wonder, your words soft but deliberate. “You may wish to double-check that.”
The Adjudicator visibly pauses at that, and it’s the first sign of uncertainty you glimpse in their armour. The first time it takes them a moment to settle on their next course of action. Faint sourness lines their dignified features while they study you, considering your words no doubt.
“Good evening to you.”
Your glare is hot enough that you’re surprised the Adjudicator doesn’t catch on fire the moment their back is turned to you—and rather bold of them to turn their back on two master assassins after what they’ve just done—and your fingers itch.
John’s fingers snap around your wrist, holding firm and stilling your rising hand. “Don’t.”
The red haze lifts and you relax your jaw. It’s only after he sees your posture loosen that he releases his grip, his fingertips lingering against your inner wrist as if savouring the contact.
On your right, Winston heaves a weary sigh. “This haven is safe no more.”  
Your eyes lower and you try to process what’s just happened.
Continental is the only sanctuary you’ve ever known—the only one you’ve ever needed—and something in your gut churns. It’s a deadly, potent mix that makes you force a calming breath.
John breaks the silence first—a rarity, but you suppose this week has been full of those. “Are the services still off-limits to us?”
Winston looks to you first, taking you in, and you wonder what he finds in your no doubt murderous expression and blazing glare. Every muscle coiled tight and ready to spring.
Destruction hums in your blood, screaming for retribution and you want to indulge in it.
They should be terrified of you, the Elder’s voice reminds you.
“Considering the fact that V’s Excommunicado was lifted minutes prior and this interesting change in circumstances…”
He fades off for a moment, giving you both another thoughtful look that tells you he’s fully appreciating who exactly is about to stand in defence of his hotel. “What do you need?”
NF3 NC6.
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You’re a statue rooted at Winston’s side.
The four of you—John, you, Winston and Charon—wait for the elevator to grind to a halt, Cheeseburger sitting patiently between you and John. Ever the loyal companion.
“We have another problem,” you declare with a subdued sigh, dragging your eyes over the metal cubicle you’re trapped in. Even years later the fear of being a trapped animal unable to escape hasn’t quite faded from memory.
The manager clicks his tongue in reply, leading you all out of the elevator and towards the massive vault door sitting at the end of a short hallway. Guards—what few cemented their loyalty to the hotel and Winston himself—dot the length of it, watchful and awaiting their orders.
“Splendid,” the man shoots back dryly. “Not like we have plenty of those already.”
“The Male Lover is here,” you inform him, ignoring his snark. “He followed me.”
Winston’s mouth curves downwards at that. He places his hand on a palm scanner, waiting. “As expected,” he offers in return, his tone challenging. “Your next move?”
“He knows something that he shouldn’t,” you answer promptly, fiddling with your fingers. John and Charon are silent behind you but you know they’re also missing a lot of context behind the conflict, especially the former. “About Chicago. I intend to find out how and from whom. Then…”
Well.
Your plan till about ten minutes ago was to capture him and keep him here. Feed him to the High Table. Exact your justice by other means.
Now though...
It’s war.
The hotel has been stripped of its immunity. People are on the way to kill Winston and John. Charon by default. Even the staff if they get in the way, though the order to evacuate has been sounded already.
If you stand with them you, too, become an enemy.
The choice is simple. Easier than most things in your life have been, and it sits right in your gut.
If the High Table wants the manager standing in front of you, they will have to go through you first. And you’re capable of unleashing a lot of damage before they ever manage to get close enough to touch him.
But this also means that there will be no divine justice at the end. By the decree of the Adjudicator, people can now spill blood freely between these walls. There’s nothing stopping Lucien from attacking you anymore. Nor will he miss such an opportunity.  
A confrontation between you two can only end one way now.
“Then I deal with him,” you finally mutter, your jaw locking with resolute firmness.
An eyebrow quirked, Winston gestures inside, going straight for the drinks cabinet. You head right without prompting, going for a very special compartment safe built into one of the wall’s inside the vault.
You’ve had it installed years ago gradually filling it full with the passage of months and then years.
Not wasting time, your palm settles on the scanner, ignoring the code pad entirely. A beep sounds and a muted green light bathes your skin a second later. A hiss follows and then—
“That’s…impressive.”
John’s voice behind you should not surprise you—and it doesn’t—but it does make you tense. Shrugging, you risk a glance in his direction to see what he makes of your collection. The quiet, impressed way his eyes drag over each shelf betrays both his surprise, and even a shade of wariness.
Vials upon vials all line the massive cabinet of three separate compartments folding outwards—custom made just for this. Labels hug each vial neatly, all of them lined up in an orderly fashion based on use and colour. The rest of the cabinet houses some of your rarest and most expensive ingredients. Carefully hidden in the most secure location you can think of—or it was till about fifteen minutes ago.
“It took me a while,” you admit though the tension in your tone and body don’t ebb away. “A lot of trial and error. And throwing up.”
You’ve been your own best guinea pig over the years, and have suffered a great deal for it. But it has also given you something no one before has been able to achieve: immunity. To most of these dark, dangerous creations of yours.
Your prized collection of at least a hundred vials makes even Baba Yaga pause and consider. See you differently no doubt.
The truth is that the sheer magnitude of the horrors and devastation this collection could unleash is unprecedented. Unrivalled by all with the exception of but one man.
And no one knows it exists apart from the people in this room and Santino. The High Table suspects something of this nature exists, you know that. Hence their insistence on you being unable to remove anything from the hotel after your Excommunicado.
“I should have told you,” John speaks up, his lips parted and tone deep, tired. “About my task. I just…”
“Knew that if you told me neither of us would have left that desert?” you guess. “Yeah, I kinda figured that.”
You understand his angle. His reason for not saying anything too. There’s just one thing that’s been bothering you since you learned about it.
“Did...did the Elder forbid you from telling me?”
John’s expression creases. “No,” he admits slowly. “But he reminded me that your forgiveness is rarer than water in the desert, and rage fiercer than the sun.”
You can almost hear that echoed in the Elder’s gentle, accented voice. Staring at the vials, you force some of them out, rolling them in your palm experimentally as you start assembling your weapons swiftly.
The task makes sense. Winston did something he shouldn’t have. Punishing him would be expected like it was with you and John. Manager or no, he’s not all-powerful.
But the thought that the Elder still knowingly told John to remove Winston stings. Deeply. He knows full well what the older man means to you.
Realising that you have nothing else to say, John steps away but you hear the reluctance in his steps when he walks away.
But all this can wait. The looming threat is the first order of business. You can’t afford any distractions, so this, too, gets shoved behind a wall. Locked tight. You can catch a moment later. Process everything that’s happened in this last week.
Charon’s lulling voice describes the change in the Black Dragon ranks to John—armour improvements, weapon improvements, more robust training. You listen with half an ear. They’ve gotten better with years, deadlier. They will not be an easy target but staring at all the vials out in the open fully and at your disposal makes your mouth twist into a cold, cruel smile.
Let them come.
You will make corpses of them all.
With that thought in mind, you arm yourself to the teeth, locking a belt around the curve of your hips. Blades slot easily against your body, vials of poison and canisters of gas following. Next, come pistols with spare clips and enough bullets to take down a small army. Fitting, considering that’s most likely what you are likely to face. You thoroughly check each pistol, removing the magazines, and making sure safety is on all of them. Double-checking there’s no jamming, either.
Once you’re comfortably armed you pull out two small needles, filling both with a small dosage of different colour solutions. You prepare more but focus on the two first.  
Charon and John are still getting prepped, arming themselves just as intently while Winston sits calmly on a luxurious leather sofa observing them. Cheeseburger lays beside him on the sofa, his ears slightly perked as he watches everyone in the room.
Charon is closer so you hand him the needle wordlessly, knowing that he’s more than aware of what it is. Moving closer to John, you note the concentration with which he adds each spare magazine into his own utility belt, a deep pinch between his brows. This lethal focus means that you’re about to lose the John you know. Once Baba Yaga arrives there will be nothing but destruction left behind.
Something in your chest is ready to do the same. You almost crave it. Like everything has been building too quickly and now you feel at a breaking point ready to unleash.
Moving swiftly, you stab a needle into John’s neck, feeling him jerk and snap his fingers around your arm just like he did earlier. His grip is harsher, his fighter instincts kicking in. This time he’s not trying to stop you from attacking anyone but himself.
Rising an unimpressed eyebrow, you remove the needle from his neck, and John sways, scowling in your direction.
“Ow. What was that?” he demands quietly, no doubt recalling the last time he had a run-in with your creations.
“A little concoction that will, hopefully, give you immunity from most things in my arsenal temporarily,” you tell him calmly, near monotonous. “Unless you prefer dissolving into an immobile puddle the moment my paralyser comes out?”
John’s brows hitch, his eyes narrowing marginally, and his chin slants. “You enjoyed that,” he states dryly.
Blinking, you feel your lips quirk in an infinitesimal smile, blinking innocently up at him. “No idea what you’re talking about,” you demure pleasantly. John stares at you blankly and your small smile quivers, widening. “Okay, fine. I totally enjoyed that.”
A tiny quirk of his own mouth follows and it feels strangely nostalgic, near bittersweet, because it’s like years ago again. Just you two getting ready for yet another job together, you teasing him or firing questions at him. He’s always been patient with you. It was a kindness you never once took for granted. You were so alone, so lost, and he’d been the only harbour you had.
Despite his flaws, despite his mistakes, in many ways, John will always be that. It’s the one thing you never see changing.
You still miss that ease you once shared. Sometimes remnants of it appear, like now, and it just makes it harder.
But reminiscing now is a fool's errand.
Instead, you reach for another blade mounted on the wall behind him and bend your knee, slotting it against the special opening in your boot. He doesn’t take his gaze away from you as you do that, and you straighten, waiting to see if he will say anything else. He doesn’t. That almost makes you smile again. Typical.
Nodding at him, you look towards Charon instead, pulling out several vials, “For the guards,” you state seriously, your ease evaporating, and he takes them without a word. “Make sure they inject themselves at least five minutes before heading out just in case. It’s going to be a nasty toxic cocktail one way or another. You already know what to do.”
A firm nod. “Certainly, Miss.”
Satisfied, you walk past them heading towards the manager who watches you curiously as you approach. Cheeseburger raises his head at once, his tail wagging at your proximity. Your fingers brush over his head, petting him, and you hold another vial for Winston to take.
Nothing to do with protection and everything to do with arming him. Which, you suppose, is its own type of protection.
He stares at you blankly, a glass of what you only assume is brandy gripped securely in his hand.
“Oh, I sincerely hope you’re joking.”
He sounds completely incredulous and you roll your eyes.
“Precautions,” you shoot back, twisting the poison vial between your fingers and holding the entire length of it out to him. “Your wisdom, remember?”
“And you think that if they somehow manage to get through you, Jonathan, Charon and the guard, as well as at least two tons of metal, that will stop them?”
“No,” you answer honestly. “But it will make me feel better if you have it.”
Winston heaves a sigh, shaking his head but takes the vial all the same, leaning back in his seat. A single eyebrow lifts as if to say satisfied? and you fight back a groan. Why can no one in your life make things easy for you? Just once?
You part your lips, a playful remark on your tongue, only for distinct thudding to sound from above. It’s faint, barely audible, but you all freeze at the sound of it.
Your eyes drag towards the ceiling, just as Winston’s voice sounds, “Charon, would you be so kind as to welcome our new guests?”
The concierge strolls briskly towards the fuse control box, pushing one of the levers down with a deafening click.
Upstairs, you know the hotel has been plunged into darkness before emergency lights come into operation.
“Let's go.”
You reach for the last few things you can get your hands on, your focus narrowing down to tunnel vision.
“You will do the Continental proud,” Winston states, sounding so sure you can’t help but lift your head in his direction from your last minute prep. “Both of you.”
Your heart jolts painfully but you nod in acknowledgement all the same. Charon returns the gesture as well.
“And Johnathan?”
The assassin halts at his name, looking towards the manager in an unspoken question. “Do what you do best. Hunt.”
The four of you share a long, leaden moment before John moves first, followed by you. The vault door whirls close behind you, securing Winston and Cheeseburger inside, but you refuse to look back.
You will see them both soon.
Splitting at the mouth of the hallway, you watch Charon lead the guards down a different path while you and John take the elevator. Divide and attack on two fronts. John will be their main target first, then you.
The man beside you is as still as death, his body relaxed but senses alert. John doesn’t fidget, hardly blinks, everything about him is steady and tranquil. Just standing near him feels electric.
“Just like old times.”
His faint words startle you. A large machine gun in his hands, the black suit, an unforgiving stare—he looks near godly, as always, and you blink in his direction. Your tongue drags over your lower lip, pensive, and when you glance back at him you see John’s eyes jump up from your mouth.
“Just like old times,” you agree softly.
You’re not sure what he sees when he looks at you. You would like to think he sees someone who exceeded his expectations for you all those years ago. Strong and unyielding.
You hope he sees an equal.
The lounge is painted with sickly green when the elevator crawls to a stop, and you both move like an extension of one another. Falling into a routine is easy because it’s instinct. The lounge is submerged in smoke, obscuring your vision so you both move silently through it, gauging the situation.
Raising your hand, you feel John slow beside you, his gun raised, covering you. Your eyes journey over the lounge, spotting blurry figures creeping through the space, trying to discover you no doubt. The black uniforms make anger simmer in your gut, gnawing on your self-control.
A hiss joins the fray of noise as you lightly roll your own gas canisters across the marble floor, your paralyser joining the smoke seamlessly.
You should really thank them. They just made this easier.
Now it’s just a matter of—
A gunshot booms behind you and you pivot on your knees, watching John tackle two men who have taken a route from behind, hidden from sight by large stone pillars.
Each man takes several bullets to take down and you frown at that. Through the darkness, you spot the heavy armour—heavier than you’ve seen them wear—as well as goddamn gas helmets on their heads.
Rising, you jog towards the bodies. John throws himself at the other approaching men and you yank on the helmet on the dead soldier’s head. It slips off relatively easily and you curse under your breath when you note what filters have been installed at the base of it.
They’re significantly better than the last time you faced off against them. This paralyser will be nothing more than an irritant at this rate.
They’ve come more than prepared.
They’ve come ready to skin the snake and hang her by that skin.  
Snarling, you hurl the helmet at another uniformed figure that rounds the column, his rifle raised, watching it crash against his head.
Two shots follow from your Glock but the man only stumbles back, and you leap at him, slotting the nozzle under his collar before firing again. A bullet slices clean through his neck, finally killing him. You slide a blade in your other hand, spinning it once. Scanning your surroundings, you take the other side so you and John work back to back even at the distance.
Gunshots explode ahead and you know that Charon has joined in the fray as well.  
Your displeasure morphs into anger and then outright fury with each dead body. It doesn’t take you long to realise that your weapons are too weak to handle this onslaught. The calibre too low. The helmets make the paralyser nothing more than a tickle down their throats and an ache in their eyes.
While that slows them somewhat, their armour is too good for a simple pistol fire. No matter how many bullets you may have at your disposal.
Slamming a knee into one man’s gut, you yank his body to one side. His body soaks up bullets his friends try to shoot at you and you pull back. A blade buries deep in his neck, you jerk the deadman again, feeling a splatter of hot liquid on your face when the blade cuts deeper into his skin.
Duck, yank, slice.
You tear through the throng of incoming soldiers but you’re slowed by the fact that each person takes too much effort to kill unless you get up close and personal. That in itself is tempting faith.
One bullet, one falter, that’s all it would take.  
A man charges at you when his gun clicks empty, and you block his punch, pistol-whipping him across the head. The contact rattles through your bones and you bare your teeth.
A slice so quick he doesn’t even register it follows before his throat opens.
Nothing but a wet gurgle slips free and gravity does the rest.
Another follows after that, and another and another. It’s chaos and darkness. The floor is slippery with blood but you push ahead your expression contorted with pure wrath.
They want to kill you, do they?  
Rules have drowned you for years now.
But right now—right this second—you’re still free of your chain.
And they have no idea what you can do.
Let me give you something to be afraid of.
With that thought racing through your mind, you turn and dash towards the elevator, slamming your hand against the button. It takes long—too long—but you know it will be worth it. Throwing yourself inside, you press the basement button over and over again, practically beating it.
The ride down seems to last an eternity as well.
You prowl inside the cubicle like a wild animal ready to spring free. So much so that the partition nearly breaks with the amount of strength you use to yank it backwards with.
“Winston!” you shout from the top of your lungs, slamming your palm repeatedly against the vault. “Let me in!”
There’s a reverberating click only moments later but you don’t wait for the hefty metal to open fully before you push inside, breathing harshly as you do.
Winston blinks slowly at the sight of you. “V?”
There is a question and a sharpness to his regard, and the wariness with which he takes you in should probably worry you. But you don’t answer him. Instead, you head straight for the cabinet. Your pulse pounding and a clamour inside your head leaving you partially deaf. To a point, both John’s and Charon’s returned presence back inside the vault scarcely registers.
A red haze clings to everything around you.
“V.”
Your knuckles are starting to swell again but after this, it won’t matter—
“V.”
“What do you want?” you hiss, each syllable acidic to a point it catches John off guard.
He mutely offers you a shotgun and something at the back of your brain recollects mentions of “armour piercing shells” but you shake your head.
“There’s still some left alive at the back, and they’re regrouping,” you say instead, trying to quell your temper. “I have something else for the second wave.”
He reads between the lines of your plan.
“I’m not leaving you alone to face them.”
Your head snaps in his direction, and you hold out a vial—smaller than others, rounder, filled with liquid that seems to be caught in a perpetual state of half-brown and half-red—in front of his face.
“This,” you begin tightly, your vocal cords straining from how hard you’re working to hold yourself back. “Is something that will kill them helmet or not. They should know better than to think that some cheap plastic will save them from me.”
You pull out two canisters of gas, shaking both as you look towards the air system. “Air filtering still on?”
“Minimal,” Winston returns, his voice dull, stare watchful. “Don’t let it consume you,” he reminds quietly after a pause.
Your grip momentarily falters at those words but that’s the only reaction he receives.
“Then I’ll do it the hard way.”
John intercepts you before you can take so much as a step, his minute unease now gone. “Why didn’t we open with that?”
You’re not sure why the hell he’s stalling now to ask you questions but you answer him despite that. “This is a diluted version of something I created a long time ago,” you tell them. “It wasn’t created to be used as a vapour. This is also the only vial I have, and it will take at least a month to create more. I was saving this for the eleventh hour because no matter how many are out there, they’re about all about to experience a quick but very painful death.”
You’re not quite sure what to make of what you glimpse across his features. Some turbulent mix of emotions he doesn’t seem to wish and explain. Day by day he learns the full extent of how you’re no longer that girl that walked away from him with tears streaming down her face.
This is what you are now. What you had to become.
You wait for a reaction, judgement, but John only steps aside, his voice a low rasp, “Be careful.”
You soften somewhat at the muted worry you hear in his voice. “You too,” you say with a sigh. “Go ahead. I’m grabbing one more canister of gas just in case. Don’t go anywhere near the lounge for the next ten minutes at least.”
Both men indicate their understanding, not bothering to question you further. And there is comfort in that, in their easy understanding and trust. They both can more than handle themselves but a distinct worry still gnaws on your entrails as you watch them leave. Lack of presence from the other guards no doubt means they’re all dead already.
So that leaves only you three.
Three vs a small army of highly trained fighters.
But not for long.
“V.”
“A little busy, Winston,” you stress while rummaging through different compartments. “Can it wait?”
Silence greets your words. Then, “If I asked for your trust. Your complete trust,” he begins purposely, his voice deceptively serene. “Would you give it to me?”
Your hands still and you stare blankly at your collection for a beat.
Straightening unhurriedly, you try to digest his words, and tilt your head in the manager’s direction.
It’s only when you note his expression that you realise something is very, very wrong.
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The lobby is a graveyard.
Both literal and figurative.
Bodies lay in heaps across the usually gleaming flooring, and you wait patiently while leaning against one of many marble columns.
Waiting you’ve gotten rather good at.
The poison sits in your hands, warmed by your palms, but still brimming that ugly dark shade despite now being transformed into a vapour. You’ve recreated two versions of The Drowning and haven’t used either since Chicago. That thought makes you glare at the ceiling above because the recollection of Rafael and Boutin still wounds.
The grandeur of the Continental never fails to impress you though. Not even years later. There is always something new to discover and admire.  
You’ve been waiting for at least five minutes now so when a creak sounds you don’t move at first. Muffled footsteps echo across the eerily quiet lobby, moving towards you.
But not from the direction of the entrance.
The louder the steps become the more obvious a secondary sound becomes as well.
Whistling.
Faint but melodic.
The familiarity of the tune causes you to stands straighter, focus on the melody.
Mr Sandman drifts through the air as a peculiar sort of goad; purposeful and sly.
“Oh, snakey,” a voice coos playfully, pausing the tune for a moment. “I know you’re hiding somewhere out here.”
Lucien.
Of course.
You’ve been expecting him to show up sooner rather than later. It’s good to know that you were right about him though. He wasn’t going to let you slip by him again. This time, you don’t want to, either. This time, you’re going to finish this.
You contemplate throwing the poison in his face but the High Table would not give up so easily. John and Charon might be cleaning up the remainder of the first wave one shotgun shell at the time but a second wave is guaranteed and soon. Logically they would want to try and overwhelm you. They’re hoping to wear you out.
“Come out, come out wherever you are,” Lucien calls out in a sing-song drawl, his footsteps slowing to a point they fade entirely. “Don’t make me find you. You’re not going to enjoy that scenario.”
“Who says I’m hiding?”
You round the column, finding his thin, solitary figure in the middle of the lobby immediately. The dark green light seems to only emphasize his gaunt frame and you take a step closer, then another.
How clever of him to wait until your paralyser is fully dispelled from the air before he came seeking you out.  
His head lowers, deepening the shadows under his eyes. “Did your guard dogs run away?” he wonders mockingly, his voice carrying. “Good, they were getting in the way.”
“Of what?”
“Our dance, of course,” he retorts, a shade angry like you should know better. “One last dance and the truth. Oh, if only you knew but you don’t. No point in secrets now though.”
You scoff, both of you watching each other as you draw nearer. “You like hearing yourself talk, don’t you, Lucien?”
The blonde assassin bares his teeth at the sound of his name—dangerous and macabre, dripping with heinous amusement—and he gazes at you for a moment. Something flickers over his shoulder—
“Not at all actually,” he states overly calm. “But you’re not the only one to have your life stolen. Maybe it’s about time you realised that,” he divulges, his voice softening into something as hateful as it is eager. Like whatever he thought he knew, he couldn’t wait to impart on you. “I’ll be waiting for you, viper.”
You aim the poison at his head, hurling it through the air with every fibre of your strength.
Lucien ducks, sliding across the floor at near blinding speed, and disappearing behind the armchairs and from your sight.
It’s at that moment that the Black Dragon’s men burst through the lobby door, their guns raised.
Following his example, you dash behind the column, an explosion of bullets following a split second later.
Rubble splinters under the abuse and you turn, avoiding the crumbling stone.
One, two, three…
This time your poison doesn’t escape in an unassuming tickle of vapour. No, this time it’s an impact of a small explosive going off, and it’s a matter of one, two, three before muffled screams and groans replace the gunfire.
Arching your back against the ruined stone, you allow your head to tip back, watching the ceiling thoughtfully. You wait till gunfire completely cuts out before moving. Then, you stride from behind the column studying the effects with a mix of cold detachment.
Your own nose and lungs ache uncomfortably—just a show of how potent the formula really is—but you don’t take your attention away from the dying soldiers. They’re more of a heap at this point, their gas masks that they no doubt were so sure would keep them safe now virtually useless.
It’s a quick but brutal affair.
Wet sounds and sobs of pain. Then, like dominoes falling, the men still one by one.
They might be only obeying orders, but they came to kill the only family you have and take your home, and you find yourself feeling little to no pity for them.
The haze is gone now, leaving the lobby even more chillingly silent than earlier.
Lucien is nowhere in sight.
You would have preferred if the poison got him but didn’t hold out much hope that it would. He’s too good and far too fast.
I’ll be waiting for you.
He will grow to regret those words.
Stepping over the bodies, you approach the spot you saw the blonde last, heading in the direction of the only corridor he could have gone down.
Glock aimed ahead, your movements are utterly silent, deadly. No matter how deep into the hotel you head, he seems to be nowhere in sight, however. This time, clearly, he wants you to look for him.
Corridor by corridor you find nothing. Then floor by floor. You know this hotel far better than Lucien does. If he really assumes he can hide from you here he’s sorely mistaken.
Gunfire rips through the air and you pause, tightening your grip on the pistol. Little by little, you decrease the distance just as a hush falls up ahead.
John’s dark hair is what you glimpse first and instinctively relax seeing that it’s him.
“John.”
The man turns towards the call of his name, and you squint at him, approaching cautiously. “Why are you wet?”
John breaths are laboured, rattling from his lungs in shallow pants, making his chest expand with each inhale. “Zero’s men.”
“The Male Lover found me too,” you tell him and you both fall into step. “Missed out on the poison party, unfortunately.”
The man at your side glances you over once—a completely wordless but attentive examination—and you huff a small breath, amused.
“I’m fine.”
You’ve forgotten how much of a mother hen he could be without saying a single word.
At least you’re a little calmer now after your previous display of explosive fury.
He seems to accept your words, and you both step into the elevator for what feels like the hundredth time in a span of only several hours.
You know what logic John is following though. Both Lucien and Zero have likely hidden up on the higher levels for two reasons.
More places to hide.
And they’re less likely to encounter any poison on the higher floors.
Leaning your shoulder heavily against the cool metal, you peer at the man only arm’s length away. Baba Yaga stands with his shoulders slumped and expression enervated. Yet he’s standing despite that. His gaze still burns with a fierce sort of determination.  
That might have been one of the first things you’ve fallen in love with—that determination and will. Followed by his often unspoken kindness.
What won’t you give for things to be different.
Going up the floors proves to be the right of course action the moment the elevator stops.
John throws himself against one side of the metal cubicle, and you do the same when a bullet whistles through the partition, piercing the metal where John’s head just was.
Pushing your hand out, you fire blindly, hearing shuffling in response, and use the distraction to peek your head over the edge. John does the exact same thing and you both fire simultaneously, hitting two men. John in the head. You in the chest. Neither moves.
Shoulders hunched and tense, you move in unison, and you conclude instantaneously that this is clearly a trap to draw you in deeper. Laying a path for you to follow until the trap springs shut.
Eyeing each other, you both move ahead despite that shared conclusion.
It doesn’t matter much now. You may only have the single magazine, and one vial of paralyser left on you after butchering your way through an entire hoard of soldiers, but it won’t matter.
There is a nagging thought at the back of your mind that you should ask about Charon but now isn’t the time for that, either. The concierge is likely back with Winston by now.  
There is a ruthless strategy to how you remove Zero’s men. One by one, shoulder to shoulder, and know that these men are afraid. That they know deep in their heart of hearts that they won’t survive the fight before it even begins but they still try. They’re strong and fast. A legacy of hard training and cruel discipline no doubt. But John is stronger and you are faster.
In many ways, they remind you of those soldiers from years ago who ambushed you in that freezing Tokyo alleyway.
Your bullets run out by the time you return to the administrative lounge. All you have on you now are two blades, paralyser, and Elder’s dagger, tucked away and out of sight. Both blades have been christened with blood two floors ago, and John is down to his bare hands.
It would put most at a disadvantage but not him. If anything, his ruthlessness only seems to grow.
But something is different this time.
Three main differences, really.
First, a jovial whistle of Mr Sandman floating through the air.
Second, three dead men that you recognise as Zero’s and finally…
Lucien leans again a glass case housing an old relic, his hands covered in blood and the tip of his blade scratching at his nail. There’s at least a few dozen of these glass cases littering the room, an old passion of Winston’s, and quite the point of pride for him. Some artifacts locked away here are worth a lot of money. Frowning deeply, you stall, drilling holes into his figure.
Lucien knows you’re here but doesn’t acknowledge you right away. He continues humming, seemingly set on finishing the tune before his head dips lazily in your direction.
“Run along, Mr Wick,” he says bluntly, his face splattered with blood. “This is between me and the viper.”
The man beside you makes a small sound at the back of his throat, near disbelieving, but you cut him off before he can speak, still staring at Lucien, “Go, John,” you say calmly. “He’s right. We have unfinished business, as do you.”
John’s stare burns into the side of your head but you don’t explain further than that. This is not his fight. You’re no longer in need of his shadow and in need of his protection.
Still, he doesn’t move right away, and you hear him audibly inhale as if he needs to say something but can’t force the words out.
You’re about to repeat yourself but he finally steps to the side, taking a path around Lucien and the dead guards. His gait is slow. He’s practically staggering because you can sense his reluctance but the fact that he listens does make you feel a tinge of satisfaction.
A part of you wants to look towards him as he disappears down the hall but you don’t.  
Lucien peers at you with a strange little smile on his face all the while, waiting till John’s footsteps fully retreat until his limbs shift. He’s still smiling faintly but you’re in no urge to finish this, so you’re fine with letting him play his games, waiting and watching.
“Had your fun?” you wonder, bored, gesturing towards the dead men at his feet.
Lucien cranes his neck, pushing away from the glass with a swiftness that makes you tense. He chuckles at your reaction, stepping over them like they’re nothing more than dirt under his boot.
“Oh, that was just a little warm-up,” he says brightly that faint, unsettling smile still lingering, and you can’t help but wonder what his deal is. He seems awfully cheery. It makes for a strange contrast to your last few run-ins. And his previous words, implying his own looming demise. “You kept me waiting. Don’t tell me you’re getting slow.”
Smiling, you too move in his direction, limbs relaxed, a peaceful hush over your body. “Are you hoping to talk me to death?”
“Now, now,” he mutters icily. “No need to be quite so rude. I just want a dance.”
Your smile splits into something bleaker, more cold-blooded, and you circle each other. Pale blue light dances across Lucien’s sharp features. A snap of jaws, a growl—there is something animalistic about the wordless exchange between you. Something brittle, a string being yanked upon repeatedly until one of you finally gives in.
Lucien leaps first.
Your knives are short, certainly not created for duelling but the clank of metal pierces the air as you both meet in the middle. Your exhausted muscles snap, tensing, coiling.
He swipes his elbow in your direction but you duck just in time, a whistle of wind tickling your temple.
Arms twisting, you both ignore the screech of metal, you punching him in the jaw while he gets you in the ribs. Gasping, you stagger back, ignoring the numbing pain. Time has dulled the memory of how hard he manages to hit if the hits land.
Lucien springs towards you again, his face contorted, lips stretched back. This time your arms are tucked at your sides and you greet his attack. Your knees knock but you manage to push him back. A swipe of your blade is your reply but he careens out of the way and you kick at him instead. He catches your knee, staggering back from the impact, and he grins at you wildly. A slight cut against the corner of his mouth bubbles up, spilling blood over his front teeth. It paints the white bone canvas with diluted scarlet.
“You didn’t answer my question earlier,” he says conversationally, and you try to sink your knife into his chest but he shoves you back. You stumble but stay upright, exhaling shakily at the pain across your ribs. “If he missed you.”
Ignoring him, you roll the blades between your fingers, drooping lower as you unleash one quick swipe after another.
Lucien lurches backwards, his expression tightening in concentration. He manages to stay out of the way, just barely. So you push him backwards till you’re back by the bodies, and the man drops to the floor so suddenly you’re left staring at empty air until your mind catches up.
He rolls across the floor, a blur of his golden hair and dark clothes the only visible thing, and you realise a second too late as to why.
A blade lays by one of the dead men covered in blood as well. You have no idea how he managed to take down three men with a minimum of two katanas at their disposal. But there’s no time to contemplate that because this time you’re the one throwing yourself backwards.
Lucien swipes the katana in a deadly arc.
His hair mused, face bloodied and a grin on his face, he gazes at you for a second. Your grip on your blades constricts.
“I wondered for years what was so special about you,” he reveals mildly, tipping his chin upwards, pulling the blade closer towards his body as he stands. “I fucking hated you, viper. Viper. I suppose that’s one of many titles for you, isn’t it? John Wick’s protege, the Vipress, the Italian’s whore, the Russian’s Viper, Lady Camorra. Honestly doesn’t your head…hurt from it all? Or does it add to your ego?”  
He spins the katana in the air, rolling his wrist—experienced and at ease, the blade like an extension of his arm. Your senses pinprick at that assessment, knowing he just made this much harder for you.
“Did the way he used to call you his desert viper make you feel powerful?” he wonders suddenly, tracing his index finger up the curve of the metal. “Gave you a sense of importance? It must have felt thrilling to be such an exception to the most powerful man in the world.”
Something inside your chest stills.
Lucien drags his eyes in your direction, watching you closely over the edge of the blade.
“My, you really do have no idea, do you?” he continues slyly, his expression slackening with amusement; malicious, wild kind that causes you to bristle. “None. Your life is, ah, what is the expression again? A hot mess, non? Oh, snakey, I thought you could be the one to teach me a lesson I failed to learn all those years ago, but your ignorance is truly disappointing.”
He cuts the air with the blade, lowering it back to his side, and you bite out a chilly, “What the hell are you talking about?”
He tuts, wagging his index finger in your direction, his grin fluttering like he’s trying to contain a laugh bubbling inside his chest.
“I kept telling you but you just don’t listen, do you?” he wonders with a click of his tongue. “I told you we were the same. Forged by the same violence. Alike in ways you failed to understand. Now, why do you think I would say that?”
You don’t respond, instead, you push yourself backwards, launching your full mass at him. Lucien greets you with a chuckle—a cold, hollow sound, teetering on manic just like the rest of him—his katana managing to absorb the impact of your shorter dual blades.  
“Tokyo, Chicago, Prague, the Albanians, the summit, us—did you really think it was all, what exactly, one funny coincidence?” he asks jovially, and a distinct chill sinks into your bones at his words, forcing you to pull yourself backwards, and dive for the other blade on the ground.
He lets you. Doesn’t bother trying to stop you, and you grip the handle in a knuckle tight grip, creating some distance between you once more. Again, he lets you, examining you with a dark but curious light gleaming in his eyes. Like you’re a lab rat he’s conducting a study on. His question rattles through your head and you squint at him.  
“You never even questioned it, did you?” he continues, his voice airy with disbelief, a joke that seems to entertain him endlessly. He’s lost interest in the fight between you for a moment, prowling across the gleaming floor but in no hurry to attack. This, clearly is more important to him. “The water, the tunnels, the darkness. A repeating pattern. All carefully put together to test you. Over and over and over again. And you exceeded his every expectation. Every challenge thrown at you, you triumphed. And even if you did wonder at the back of your mind, you never once were made to believe that someone else was pulling the strings all along. Think, snake. Think.”
You’re not sure if you’re still breathing.
What…
No…
No, it doesn’t…
It’s not possible. It…can’t…
Your head is empty and you gasp for breath but your lungs feel blocked, your throat locked.
Lucien attacks in a blur.
You just barely manage to muster up the speed to block him, a piercing screech of metal against metal. Your arms buckle under his strength and he kicks you, catching you in the gut. One, two—
A muffled curse slips free, everything spinning, and he grabs the spare blade in your hand, throwing it away.
Parrying for control, you attempt a punch at his head but it’s too slow and sloppy. He catches your fist, bending your arm at a sharp angle. You relax it as per your old training to avoid broken tendons or bones. The katana slips from your hand and you growl under your breath, your free hand managing to form a fist.
A punch to his gut hits him quicker than a snake bite. Brutally efficient, impacting the exact same spot you gutted him only weeks prior.
Lucien grunts. Swears. His teeth gleam, still tinged by blood and you feel his hot breath on your face. Death and decay and—
You’re too misbalanced that you don’t notice it fast enough.
Lucien kicks you in the stomach with enough strength to send you flying.
A second of weightlessness enfolds you and then comes the crash.
Glass shatters upon contact and you muffle a cry of pain, feeling glass explode and rain down around you. Hitting the floor with a deafening thud, you stay there for a while, everything ringing and blurred around you.
A feeble moan escapes you, pained and strangled.
You attempt to shake your head, your fingers twitching against the glass covered floor.
“Tokyo was just the beginning,” Lucien’s muffled voice sounds like you’re underwater and you groan, weakly tilting your head to spot his approaching legs. Glass crunches under his boots and you try to desperately block out his words. “He’s always been on the lookout for new members to join his inner circle. Best of the best. And he’s always paid close attention to poisoners like you. Tokyo was just a nudge to see what you were made of. But you didn’t break and it escalated too far. Do you know what the Elder did after you escaped? Why you never heard from Kishi’s little group again? It wasn’t because of Wick. It was because the Elder had the entire clan killed. Just that easily. Because they disobeyed him.”
“No, no…”
It can’t be true.
It can’t.
He has to be lying. It doesn’t make any sense…
Except…it does.
“Did you never ask yourself why Tarasov didn’t simply turn you into another whore or sell you?” he demands harshly. “Later, I imagine, it was a certain degree of fear of you. But initially, it was because of the Elder’s will. Even if all Viggo Tarasov knew back then was that the Table willed it so.”
You focus on your core, trying to get yourself to move but Lucien speeds up his approach, kicking you in the stomach.
Pain blinds you and you roll across the floor. Your forehead connects with the glass, your left eyebrow splitting on impact. You don’t realise it at first—not till numbness is replaced by a sensation of something wet trailing down your face.
Droplets of fresh blood hit the crushed glass beneath you, and you crawl ahead with a pained gasp.
“Next—and my personal favourite—Chicago,” Lucien narrates loudly, his voice echoing through the large space. You hear him behind you but utter shock wins out, locking your limbs, leaving you a frail mess on the ground for him to prey upon. A part of you wants to roar, another wants to cry. Your training battles against the yawning abyss you keep slipping down with each horrifying word. “Who do you think fed the father-son wonder duo their information? Why do you think you were taken to an underground facility that was spitting image of Tokyo? Why not just kill you and D’Antonio outright? Boutin thought he was getting a special task but the truth was that he had long since outlived his use. The Elder fed both Boutin and his son to you to see what you would do. Black Dragon and D’Antonio were just pawns to hide the real test.”
The highway. The way they just kept attacking but not trying to kill you. It was to see how long you will last.
You want to be sick, a dry heave bubbling past your lips, every word crushing you harder, harder, harder—
“And, once again, you did perfectly but not without a loose end,” he sneers, venturing closer, step by step, as is savouring your reaction. “He also knew that the fear of being found out will make you more compliant. Wasn’t it peculiar that he summoned you right after you returned to New York? It’s almost like he…knew. Well, he did. He always has.”
Biting your tongue, you try to push yourself up on your elbows.
Ignore him, don’t listen, don’t—
“Prague. Again. Poison that made you struggle,” he reveals, his voice pitching towards impatience now. “The syndicate that took your Italian had no prior conflicts with Camorra and for a reason. Another test and punishment. More pieces for you to remove.”
Santino was taken for no reason. Right after your return from the desert. Cognitionis had no former alterations with Camorra up until that point. They were far too small to ever risk the wrath of a powerhouse like Camorra. They hadn’t even made demands which struck you as so odd back then but you had chalked it up to them wanting to prove a point.
A poison the heir was poisoned with was sophisticated and took some time to reverse-engineer. So long, in fact, that Santino nearly died.  
“Albanians. Same thing,” Lucien voices harshly, punctuating every word. He’s gotten so close that when the second kick comes the pain is distant, muted. Because what he’s betraying is so, so much worse. “It wasn’t Camorra that started the conflict. It was made to seem that way. Tarasov was cautioned to keep a close eye on you. To a point he forbade you from helping Camorra, right? And what did you do after that, snakey?” he demands, bending down and yanking you upwards by the back of your neck.
He pulls you towards him and more blood trails down your face. Lucien’s narrowed eyes search for something in your expression, and he smiles faintly when he spots it. “That’s right. It’s all starting to click, isn’t it?”
Tarasov forbade you from helping Camorra, from helping Santino. It was the first time you ever talked back to him. First time you ever conjured up enough courage to do so.
And then, furious and upset, you ran. Straight to Casablanca. And nearly back to the man who always expected—knew, he fucking knew, planned for it—for you to come back to him.
It’s what he wanted from the start and it would have been your choice.
No forced loyalty.
You will always lose, and it will always lead you back to me.
Oh God.
If Santino had come just half a day later you won’t even be here right now. You would be with him, at his side, and none the wiser to this truth.
The terrible, dark truth of what loneliness can do to someone.
“I even told you it was him,” the man holding you whispers, his head dipping to one side when he drags his fingers over your face, wetting them with your blood. “You just don’t remember, do you?”
His disappointment is once again palpable.  
Except while you’re staring at the cutting lines of his face, a recollection does come.
The warehouse. You tied to a chair. A needle stuck in your neck as Lucien leaned his body over you. The scathing bewilderment at the fact that he has managed to find something powerful enough to knock you out for hours. Those thin, pink lips shaping words while whatever he injected you with coursed through your veins, and a name you didn’t catch.
The Elder sends his regards.
Lucien’s fingers sink deep into the skin of your neck, his expression clouding with rage the longer he gazes at you.
“You were his favourite,” he seethes bitterly, ripping you upwards and on your knees so quickly you’re left scrambling. Your legs drag across the glass shards and your hands lock shakily around his, trying to rip out of his grip. “No one after you was good enough! We trained until our bones broke. We could bleed ourselves dry, and it still wasn’t enough!”
Shódigan.
That’s why he asked if you knew about it.
You thought you did but—
He flings you ahead and your body slides across the gleaming flooring, leaving a trail of blood behind. Lucien follows, stalking closer, and squats beside you, this time yanking you upwards by the collar of your shirt. “He adored you,” he adds with a hiss, his fury scalding your skin; an old, festering resentment. “And now you’re paying the price for that adoration.”
He exhales with great difficulty, taking several moments to reign in his temper.
Now, you understand his obsession with you perfectly.
He is like you.
He was a candidate too.
He must have been.
Another face in a long line of candidates for the coveted disciple position.
This time when Lucien speaks, his voice sounds contemplative, “Though I suppose you should thank him too,” he states forcefully light. “One day you will be remembered as a legend, just like your Baba Yaga. He helped to forge you into what you are today.”
You’re too numb to feel anything else.
There is just a hushed sort of silence ringing through your head.
Undeterred by your lack of response, Lucien goes on, wiping at the blood on his face, “You know there is an old French saying: qui se resemble, s'assemble. Can you guess what it means?” he doesn’t wait for your answer this time, either. “Every man loves well what is like to himself. You are each other’s dark mirror. His counterpart.”
He giggles this time, grabbing your face, his fingers cutting into the flesh of your cheeks, and for the first time since he started his speech, something sparks in your gut.
Shock or not, your body is failing to respond but you battle against it, silencing your mind.
Hurt and betrayal slam like an overloading flood against your composure despite your best attempts to stay afloat.
You’re such a fool.
Such a lonely, naive fool.
So desperate to believe.
Hope.
Just like he was.
Lucien is right.
You and Elder are two broken halves of a mangled whole.
The same man you once saw as a chance for redemption, belonging, is the architect of the majority of the pain in your life.
One day, if you still wish it, I will tell you everything.
Everything. This is what he had meant by everything.
He ordered Winston’s death not because the manager broke the rules but because he wanted to remove your main tie to New York—the very tie that made you choose to leave him in the first place.
And John would have been the one to fire the bullet.  
You would have hated him for the rest of your days for taking the manager away from you.
Santino is still weak and so very easy for the Elder to dispose of right now.
The Lovers. Their mission to hunt you both down.
Another test for you, another tie cut if they succeed in killing Santino.
And you would have crawled to him on your hands and knees, hoping for his kindness once again. Heartbroken and alone with no one to turn to.
He would have won and you would have made it easy for him.
So very easy.
Lucien drinks in your tiny, wet breaths and glassy stare. Blood continues dripping from the cut against your eyebrow and you shiver in his hold.
A tear trails down your cheek and you can’t process a single thought. It’s too much, it’s…  
“He always feared you would find out,” this time his voice is softer, emptier, and the hollows that make up his eyes examine you shrewdly. “But it’s a fitting punishment. To care for someone so deeply, to desire them, only to live with the burden of knowing that you are the reason for their suffering.”
His fingers tremble, sunken deep into your cheeks, and another off-tilter laugh tickles from the back of his throat.
“I really did hate you, your shadow, for years. Until those tunnels,” he murmurs, his faint accent just a little more notable then, his grip easing, loosening. “Until I saw how much darkness lurks under that mask of calm. How much hate festers inside you but directed at the wrong people. I told you we were one and the same. You should have listened.”
He shakes his head, blonde strands brushing over his forehead, his mouth stretching into another beaming smile, all teeth.
Lucien lets you go and you drop the ground like a puppet with its strings cut.
That’s all you are—comes the sinking, gutting realisation—a puppet for others to use and play with.
“He will kill me for what I’ve done to you,” Lucien announces, sounding like he’s made peace with that grim fact long ago. “But you know it’s funny, snakey. I always thought I would enjoy this more. Getting back at them by betraying his secrets. Seeing that realisation on your face. That crumbling hope and despair as your world unravels and crashes around you,” he says softly, near lovingly.
It must have taken him years to gain this level of trust, to learn this information.
You don’t move a muscle. All you can see are Lucien’s legs but you can feel him staring down at you.
The blonde tsks under his breath, nudging you with the tip of his boot but you don’t react. “You want to deny it, I know you do,” he begins purposely, and you suppose he would know, won’t he? “But you can’t. Because I bet every single thing that’s never made sense about your life before now suddenly does. Am I right, snakey?”
Your fingers tremble and you press them closer to your body.
“Looking at you now, I almost pity you,” he muses and there is a distinct note of uncomfortable surprise in his low voice. It almost makes you ponder just how large the line between this lucid Lucien and his insanity really is. “You’re just a little tragedy, aren’t you?” he adds thoughtfully.
Little tragedy. Little tragedy. Little tragedy.
It echoes.
You wonder, then, what you would have become had you been allowed to stay a girl. If you didn’t have to become a monster. Even though the monster kept you alive, kept you breathing and fighting.
What would you have become if you hadn’t been robbed of a future you could have had?
“Your life is not your own, it never was.”
Deafening, hollow silence follows that statement. Your heart thuds so painfully inside your chest, a part of you waits for it to stop on its own.  
Lucien’s boot settles against your waist again, pushing you onto your back.  
You stare up at the ceiling above you and count the beats of your heart.
The assassin straddles you unhurriedly as if expecting you to fight back but all you do is blink slowly.
Everything is rushing through your head right now. Every moment over the last seven years.
His fingers brush over the curve of your neck and he stares down at you with an almost rueful expression on his face.
“What a waste,” he starts tightly, followed by a long pause and he mutters something in French under his breath. His fingers settle around your throat—not squeezing, simply gazing down at you. “I knew it would crush you. But I hoped for that rage. For the abyss. For you to show me once and for all what I lacked that you had. Your lesson.”
So that’s what that was about.
“We might have been friends had we met sooner, serpent girl.”
His fingers constrict—
“My—”
Your voice cracks and Lucien’s grip relaxes instantly. The thin line of his eyebrows knits in confusion. “Quoi?”
Gulping a painful breath, you part your lips, “My…lesson,” you croak out, tasting blood on your tongue and how fitting that you should. “My lesson…I have the answer.”
A certain light devours his gaze, and although his features drop with surprise, his eagerness is tangible.
He leans closer, and over you, his fingers still around your throat, “Tell me.”
Your tongue feels heavy and dry inside your mouth, an acrid aftertaste coating it, and Lucien jerks his fingers harder around the fragile column. He presses closer, his body weight pinning you down—
You jerk your body, a blur of your arm, a gleam of a dagger in the artificial, cold light. The Elder’s dagger in your hand trembles but gushing scarlet coats it still.
“I’m faster.”
Lucien gapes, his mouth parted. He convulses, his grip on your neck slipping, and you lurch your hips upwards, throwing him off you.
He drops to the side, right beside you, unmoving but the heat of his body still warming you—and you clutch the dagger tighter between your blood-stained fingers. You press it to your chest and lay there till time becomes nothing.  
BC4 BC5.
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Years ago when you escaped to Casablanca, eager to start your life over and join the Elder once again, Sofia told you something that has stuck with you ever since.
Sometimes you have to kill what you love.
You’ve thought about that a lot over the years. What exactly she had to sacrifice to have the power she now possesses—her daughter, flesh and blood, and good.
What you may have to sacrifice one day to earn your freedom.
Now, you suppose, none of that matters anymore.
Not really.
You’ve almost won your pyrrhic victory, Kishi purrs happily at your side, and you hear the subdued rumble of Tarasov’s laugh too, soon you can savour the rotting, sweet taste of it on your tongue.
The rooftop terrace door slams open, and you step onto the patio, halting the heated conversation with your arrival. There is an unsteady sway to your limbs that doesn’t escape anyone’s attention—John’s shoulder’s slump, Winston’s eyes narrow, the Adjudicator simply arches an eyebrow—but your expression remains steely.
The fire roars behind Winston and Charon—and it is, admittedly, a massive relief to see them both safe and unharmed—even if it makes you think how close you came…
No.
None of that now.
You’ve lived through worse (have you? liar, liar, liar, Kishi coos) and you give them a forced, fragmented smile.
“Mornin’.”
The Adjudicator grimaces subtly, and you know it’s likely because your injuries leave your smile bloody. Good.
“The Vipress,” the Adjudicator greets, standing to their feet. “I must express my apologies on behalf of the High Table. It does, indeed, seem like the general order in regards to you has...changed.”
They don’t look particularly happy to admit that but this is no time to goad, if you even could muster up the strength for it.
Instead, you stare blankly in their direction for a beat. “Excuse me,” you say, your voice a grating whisper, as you push past them. “Killing your lackies has made me thirsty.”
You shoulder past them, avoiding contact, your eyes momentarily jumping to Winston who stands right behind the Adjudicator, his stare cautious. Your eye contact lasts no more than a scant few seconds but it’s enough.
It’s a split second in which you grab a glass of champagne, ignoring the other snacks on the table.
You turn to face them, finding them all in differing states of confusion or uncertainty but offer no explanation as you drown three large gulps.
“Let’s get on with it, then,” you phrase bitingly, not bothering to hide the impatience, the sting of bubbling acid and, and… “I would like to have breakfast and take a shower. It exhausts a girl, having to take down armies. Hope you can appreciate that at least most of mine are in one piece. Less blood for you to wipe,” you comment idly, directing your words at the Adjudicator.
Coldness lurks in their regard, and you can tell that their opinion of you is less than savoury.
You don’t give a shit what they might think of you.
Every word slips past your lips on automatic; mindless, void syllables that feel drained of life. It’s an effort to register anything around you.
The blood, the champagne, the bubbles tickling your nose.
“While you have been pardoned of your crimes,” the Adjudicator resumes smoothly, clearly eager to get the conversation back on track and out of the way. “I’m afraid no such thing has happened with Mr Wick. A man who has shown no loyalty, no regard for the rules. It is by that logic the Table’s decrees that the punishment should fit the crime.”
Winston hums loudly, his head tilting as he nods in absentminded agreement.
You take another sip of your drink, frowning at the taste of blood in your mouth. Fitting, somehow.
You might have scrubbed yourself clean of blood before coming up here but it still stains the cracks of your skin. Cuticles stained with red, mouth stained with red.
Red, red, red…
John straightens at those words. He looks beat from his own fight but remains quiet. Yet, he can no doubt sense that something’s wrong.
“You’re correct,” Winston states, no affliction to be found in his voice and he steps closer, pulling something from behind his jacket. “Sorry, Jonathan.”
BANG
The gunshot is like a thunderclap through the too still morning.
John’s body jerks with the impact, a gasp sounding a second later, and you look at him while Winston steps closer.
BANG
John scrambles backwards, his bulletproof clothing absorbing the impacts but it won’t get him far.
“(Name)!” he calls out desperately, pained, his eyes seeking your form out, his voice cracking and splintering.
You can’t help and wonder if he’s scared. He sounds scared. There is something ironic—downright hilarious—in the knowledge that he’s facing death yet calling out your name like it may prove to be a salvation.  
It’s the first time since you asked him not to use your real name that he uses it. But you don’t move. Don’t respond to the plea for help. Mercy.
You just stare at him, indifferent and cold, knowing that even if you tried you couldn’t muster up any emotional response right now.
Winston fires again, and again, and John veers towards the building edge, his knees shaking.
The manager’s expression remains vacant, cold, and he shoots again, no hesitation in his aim. Not a single falter. It’s one of the most well carried out executions you’ve ever witnessed.  
John’s back hits the ledge and you watch in near slow motion as he tips over the edge falling at least twenty floors down and towards the concrete below.
You hear the metallic bangs as he hits a few fire escapes on his way down but still don’t move.
Then, impact so loud it splits the air.
Then, stillness.
The typical buzz of New York City waking up resumes. Time restarts and goes back to its natural flow once again.
Throwing your glass back, you drown the remainder of the champagne, licking your lips twice, yet blood still lingers.
Winston lowers his arm, approaching the edge but the Adjudicator gets there first. Charon is only a step behind them, and you force yourself to move after them as well.
The Adjudicator gazes down for a long, assessing moment, silent. Their head turns towards the manager who meets their probing stare flatly.
“I assume we’re done here?” he questions.
The Adjudicator inclines their head and, predictably, switches their attention to you. “You did not help him.”
A fact, not a question, yet it demands an explanation all the same. Your tongue moves on automatic, forming words that taste brittle.
Everything feels brittle.
“Why would I?” you wonder dully. “He betrayed me not so long ago, and nearly killed the majority of my friends less than a week ago. I learned my lesson.”
Chuckling, you turn your back to them, walking away leisurely. The glass clangs back onto the coffee table, a shriek of a sound. “I have served. I will be of service,” you echo the mantra pleasantly, faint with scorn.
Every word bleeds venom through your heart.
You don’t face them again, and no one stops you. The terrace doors slam shut behind you, and it’s a deafening bang that reverberates. You force yourself to put one foot in front of another. Keep walking, keep walking, keep—
It’s a blur, your feet dragging behind you. You’ve stopped bleeding but still have to halt at one point, leaning your palm against the corridor wall to rest.
You’re teetering and—
Your life is not your own, it never was.  
Your room sits untouched. The door opens with a click that’s like a kiss against your hair—so soothing and loving, comforting in ways that you could never quite explain.
The table is still an organised mess; notes half-unfinished, empty vials, dried ingredients—all littering the wooden surface, and you approach it slowly.
Exactly as you left it before you departed for Rome.
It seems like a lifetime ago now.
Everything is the same here, frozen in time.
Except nothing is the same.
Your fingertips trace over your notebook; a new formula, a collection of improvements on old ideas, scribbles that don’t make much sense to anyone but you.  
Your legacy. Your work.
This room is a testament to who you are. What you have become.
A tragedy.
Not a legend, or a fighter, just a tragedy of a girl.
A sound escapes you at that, strangely wounded, and you lean the heels of your palms against the table edge, your vision blurring.
Tragedy, tragedy, tragedy.
A puppet stitched together by different hands, influenced by different people.
You’re a product of someone else.
Every victory from your past sours and cracks with that realisation. You must have made him so proud.
You hate this room, this table, these plants, yourself.
This time a scream rips from the back of your throat. A brutal sweep of your hands wipes the table clean, everything plummeting to the floor with a booming crash.
You destroy everything in your path. Glass explodes, paper rips, liquids spills. You’re panting, sweating, and shaking by the time you come back to yourself. The floor is a mess, the whole room is.
A glint catches your notice when you spin on your heels, and your head snaps to the floor-length mirror across the room.
You don’t recognise anything about the bloodied, tear-stained, wild reflection that glares back at you. A monster is all that stands there. Alone and devoid of everything.
Distance evaporates between you, and you slam the hilt of the only weapon you still have left into the glass. The Elder’s dagger shatters the mirror upon contact. Cracks fracture your face before the mess crashes at your feet with another ear-splitting echo.
That uses the last tendril of strength left in your body—perhaps your very soul.
Your knees fold under you—and it’s almost soft, your crumbling.
Weightless and empty you settle on the floor.
Tears stream down your cheeks, hitting the crushed glass in front of you but you don’t wipe them away, don’t make a single sound. You can’t.
Your forehead lowers between your knees, your hushed sobs the only noise permeating through the peaceful room.
You don't get back up.
B4.
. . .
AN: 
well. 
now you know. 
not sure how many of you are even around to read this but a fun game to play now that you're done:
- reread COA from start to finish, noting every use of "honoured guest" in relation to V spoken by her enemies throughout the years, even the elder himself.  
441 notes · View notes
astradrifting · 3 years
Note
GRRM really created so many parallels and foreshadow using the DoD characters that honestly we could just figure the asoiaf ending by analyzing it. My favorite is the Aegon III-D@ny parallels, the fact that one of his closest allies was a face-scarred Master of coin Lannister who ended as Hand to Bran' parallel character just make it so obvious its funny.
Oh my god I didn’t even realise Tyland Lannister was initially on the greens’ side! I’m not super fond of Tyrion ending up as Hand, but you’re right that it’s so obviously meant to reference him. There’s so many parallels that it’s a little crazy. I don’t want to say that the second Dance will end exactly as the first did, it’d be a little too neat if history repeated entirely, but you can see so many echoes of it even in the show’s bastardised ending.
“The broken, shattered realm suffered for a while yet, but the Dance of the Dragons was done. Now what awaited the realm was the False Dawn, the Hour of the Wolf, the rule of the regents, and the Broken King.”
(TWOIAF, Aegon II)
I’m not sure what the False Dawn is going to parallel to, it refers to the period of time after Aegon II’s death but before Lord Stark got to King’s Landing, when people thought that peace had finally come. It kind of brings to mind the War for the Dawn, though personally I think that the threat of the Others will be resolved before the Dance is over. The Hour of the Wolf is obviously about House Stark’s rise back to power, and the Broken King is Bran - though if he actually becomes known as Bran the Broken I might end up committing violence ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. 
The parts about Lord Corlys Velaryon are why I’m so hopeful that Jon’s book ending will be completely different from the show’s. He’s arrested for Aegon II’s death by Cregan Stark, even though Cregan had previously declared for Rhaenyra, because as TWOIAF puts it, “to kill a cruel and unjust king in lawful battle was one thing. But foul murder, and the use of poison, was a betrayal against the very gods who had anointed him.”
Corlys didn’t deny his guilt, and expressed no regret. “What I did, I did for the good of the realm. I would do the same again. The madness had to end.”
Cregan Stark declared him to be guilty of murder, regicide, and high treason, and he was sentenced to execution. But many spoke in his defence, even people who had fought against him in the Dance. Baela and Rhaena Targaryen, Corlys’ granddaughters and Aegon III’s half-sisters, convinced Aegon to issue an edict pardoning Lord Velaryon, which Alysanne Blackwood then convinced Cregan to let stand. Lord Velaryon was pardoned and even restored to his offices and honours, made one of the king’s regents and given a place on the small council.
Corlys’ words definitely could be Jon’s as well, a much more in-character declaration post-D@ny’s death than the drivel GoT tried to feed us. I was worried for a bit that this would be how Tyrion is let off scot-free, but Baela and Rhaena, who were vital to his release, are such obvious Arya and Sansa stand-ins, and they’re certainly not going to expend any effort in helping Tyrion. So Corlys’ circumstances more likely lays the groundwork for how Jon will be freed and remain in political power, while Tyland frankly inexplicably becoming Aegon III’s Hand after he was in favour of brutally killing him parallels Tyrion managing to fail up, as a way of reconciling the old regime with the new one.
This makes Tyrion becoming Hand more palatable IMO. Either Jon and Tyrion both should have been punished or neither should have been punished, not the travesty where Tyrion gets everything he’s ever wanted while Jon is exiled to a Watch with no purpose and a Wall that’s already half-collapsed, so what exactly can it protect against? I suppose they were afraid of seemingly rewarding Jon for killing d@ny, especially if pol!Jon had been revealed, but most people noticed how nonsensical his ending was, and it just led to ‘Bloodraven/Bran is the real villain’ takes anyway.
(Side note: Asha/Yara basically still being loyal to D at the end annoys me so much, and made no sense. Jon did more to help save her by giving Theon that pep talk than D@ny did. Maybe it was a leftover from her taking Victarion’s role in the story, but in no reasonable world is anyone going to listen to the Ironborn who brought the Fire threat over in the first place.)
Of course Tyland Lannister isn’t actually Hand for long, given that he dies barely two years later from Winter Fever, feared and hated, alone except for a maester and King Aegon. It might be an indication that Tyrion will face a similar fate, that he’ll die after he’s seemingly won, exactly what he threatened Cersei with:
“A day will come when you think yourself safe and happy, and suddenly your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth, and you'll know the debt is paid."
(ACOK, Tyrion XII)
So that I can stop talking about Tyrion, here’s some facts about Rhaena and Baela that are obviously meant to reference Sansa and Arya, so much so that it feels a little bit like GRRM is winking and going “See what I did there? Huh? Huh? Did you see??”:
- their descriptions: “Rhaena was slender and graceful; Baela was lean and quick; Rhaena loved to dance; Baela lived to ride...” + “Baela was wild and willful”, “more boyish than ladylike”, and kept her hair cropped short as a boy’s
- Rhaena spent most of the Dance in the Vale, where she lived in relative comfort as the ward of Lady Jeyne Arryn. Baela was a dragonrider and so moved between Dragonstone and Driftmark, but was captured on Dragonstone when Aegon II descended upon it
- Rhaena was favoured to be queen after her brother, considered more qualified than her wild sister
- Baela liked to spend time with “unsuitable companions” she would bring to the Red Keep - including a comely juggler, a blacksmith’s apprentice whose muscles she admired (!!!), a legless beggar, a pair of twin girls from a brothel, an entire troupe of mummers once
- After her brother’s regents tried to marry her to a lord 40 years older than her, Baela escaped the Red Keep by climbing out of a window, trading clothes with a washerwoman, then walking right out of the front gate. She ran away to Driftmark and married her supposed cousin (though more likely he was her half-uncle), the legitimised bastard Alyn Velaryon, which might have had me worried about j0nrya if Alyn weren’t best known for being a daring sailor who went on many voyages, including sailing the Sunset Sea, until he was finally lost at sea during Aegon IV’s reign. Alyn’s mother was also called Mouse, for being “small, quick, and always underfoot.”
- another fun fact about Alyn: he’s a bad haggler, and had to agree to a high ransom and many concessions in order to get Prince Viserys returned to Westeros. This automatically disqualifies him as a Jon stand-in, because as we all know, Jon Snow can haggle like the best of fishwives.
- My absolutely favourite detail that has my jonsa heart singing - Rhaena was more dutiful than her sister and would have married a man that the king and council chose, saying that as long as he was “kind and gentle and noble, I know that I shall love him.” She was able to marry her first choice, whom the regents didn’t immediately approve of but that they ultimately accepted  - Ser Corwyn Corbray, the brother of the Lord Protector of the Realm, a second son (!) whose late father had gifted him the Valyrian steel sword Lady Forlorn (!!!)
And as a treat for @istumpysk, some similarities between Rickon and Viserys II!
- the youngest child of their family
- separated from their older brother after they were forced to flee their home, trying to get to safety while their other brothers and mother were at war
- worshipped their oldest (half-)brothers, but were closer to the brother nearest their age
- spends the war stuck on an island, populated by people closely linked to their family’s origins - Skagosi are descended mostly from the First Men, while Viserys was on Lys, where the blood of Old Valyria still runs strong
- sought by/held hostage by a powerful and wealthy family, who will treat them well but whose intentions are dubious
- will be brought back from exile by an upjumped bastard/commoner from a port town who was raised to lordship and became their monarch’s chief admiral
- after they are returned, long after the wars and crises, is happily welcomed as the heir to their older brother’s throne (shhhhh just let me have this, let the baby live)
Thanks for the ask!
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chudleycanonficfest · 3 years
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young dumb thrills
Day 26, Post #2 by @accio-broom
Title: young dumb thrills Author/Artist: accio-broom Pairing: Gryffindor pals Prompt: Studying together Rating: T Trigger Warning(s) (if any): Ron likes to swear, a lot. Also, the lads enjoy not speaking very nicely about the women in their year.
“Merlin, this potions essay is a pile of wank. I'm so fucking bored.”
Seamus snaps his book shut, his Irish lilt filling the dorm room and disturbing the peace. Until the rude intrusion, Ron had been attempting to write a Transfiguration essay on the benefits of Non-verbal spells, although he was struggling without Hermione’s usual help.
Four heads, belonging to the various bodies strewn around the place, lift from their books and parchment. The sixth-year Gryffindors throw frowns and obscenities at their friend.
“Well, it was your idea for us to do something together,” Dean comments, letting his head loll to the side to rest on his arms, his eyes closing.
“Yeah, but when I suggested it, I had a night of debauchery and booze on my mind. Not being shut up here on a Friday night.”
Ron laughs and abandons his parchment on the bedroom floor. He rolls off his tummy then wriggles into a sitting position, his back flush against his trunk. It allows him a better view of his dorm mates.
Seamus is sat up in his bed, resting against the headboard, his now shut Potions book by his feet. Dean sits in one of the window seats whilst Neville is perched next to his bedside table, crooning at his Mimbulus Mimbletonia. Harry is in one of the cosy armchairs next to the fire, switching his obsessive gaze between the Marauder’s Map and the Half-Blood Prince’s Potions book.
“Debauchery?” Ron scoffs. “What kind of stuff did you think we’d be getting up to stuck in Gryffindor tower? You tried sneaking in the Firewhisky, but you were thick enough to let Filch catch you. McGonagall has got us on lockdown because of you, and we can’t even sneak out the window for a fly ‘cos it’s pissing down outside.”
Frowning, Seamus retorts, “At least I tried. Anyways, you and Potter don’t seem to have any difficulties getting yourselves into trouble, despite the rules and detentions and any other fucking thing the staff throw at you.”
Harry, who has been a silent observer up until now, finally pipes up, “You know, I’d gladly trade places with you, Seamus, if it means getting a quiet year without Voldemort trying to kill me.”
The other four boys shudder at Harry’s use of You-Know-Who’s real name. Once he has recovered, Seamus waves a dismissive hand before flopping down onto his stomach.
“Yeah, yeah. We all know that Voldie prefers to wait until the end of the year before trying to kill you. You could at least enjoy yourself up until then.” A heavy sigh escapes his lips. “How did it come to this, lads? We're all virile, good looking fellas. Well, apart from Nev. Yet, here we are on a Friday night, with only each other for company.”
“Oi!” Neville frowns, swivelling to face his friends with his hands on his hips. “At least I managed to get a date for the Yule Ball. Dean didn’t go with anyone.”
“Yeah, but I have a girlfriend now.”
Dean’s cheeks darken as Ron’s eyes narrow. The redhead’s stomach churns. Sure, he’s adjusted to catching Dean snogging his sister in the common room now, but it doesn’t mean he enjoys it. He knows the type of stuff Dean gets up to, the sort of things he says behind closed doors. He’d rather Ginny didn’t get involved with a guy like Dean, but Ron knows it’s out of his control.
“Out of all of us,” Dean continues, “It’s only Weasley and me who have birds.”
“Yeah, that’s right,” Ron joins in, mostly to distract himself from his overprotective urges. Ginny is more than capable of looking after herself, and she’s told him enough fucking times, too. “And I could be downstairs with Lav right now, but you were so adamant that we were going to have a good night. Anyway, you can take the piss out of Neville all you want, but I bet you haven’t even snogged a girl, Seamus.”
The Irish Gryffindor’s eyes brighten with glee. “Yeah, I have. Your girl.”
Ron isn’t surprised at the emptiness he feels at the jibe. His feelings for Lavender fizzled out ages ago, and he’s been trying to finish things for weeks. The only problem is he can’t seem to say or do the right thing to scare her away. He should probably come out and say it, try this honesty thing Hermione is always harping about, but Ron likes his balls attached to his body. Plus, it’s kind of nice having a girlfriend and feeling like someone wants him.
Still, he has to keep up appearances. He reaches behind his trunk and fishes out one of his trainers from under his bed before hurling it at Seamus. The guy moves fast, rolling to the side to avoid being hit in the head as he bursts out laughing.
“And a good kisser she is too,” he adds.
“Who do you reckon is the best snogger out of the whole of Gryffindor?” Dean muses.
Ron mutters, “Aren’t you still dating my sister, Dean?” 
He knows his anger is irrational, Dean has done nothing wrong, but the images of the guy snogging Ginny then moving on to the next girl to compare them fills his brain, making him feel sick.
Seamus interrupts, still laughing. “For the guys? Then it’s me for sure. But I don’t know who’s the best out of the girls. I’ve snogged quite a lot of them. Some of them are amazing, and others are shit.”
“Fuck off have you,” Dean laughs too. “You’ve snogged Lavender, and that’s it.”
“Nah, I’m being honest with you. Weasley turned me down. It’s only her and Granger I haven’t snogged, truth be told.”
Ron sits bolt upright, all his fury at Dean forgotten as his heart pounds an irregular beat against his ribcage. However, he tries to arrange his face into a calm look. A few times, his secret crush on Hermione has almost been exposed, mostly via mutterings in his sleep. But so far, he’s managed to keep a firm lid on it, or so he believes.
“I don’t think Hermione has snogged anyone,” says Neville.
Dean shakes his head. “I’d put five knuts on her having snogged someone. She went to the Yule Ball with Viktor Krum, after all.”
“Doesn’t mean she kissed him.” Seamus shrugs.
Harry pipes up again. “She did.” He blushes as all eyes settle on him. “Only a small one, though.”
The rest of the room erupts in fits of laughter, but Ron can’t hear it over the roar of his heart in his ears. He digs his fingernails into his leg, ignoring the flare of pain as they break the skin. So, Harry knows that Hermione snogged Vicky, too? How many people did Hermione tell? How the fuck could his best friend keep something like this from him? Why hasn’t anybody told him?
Out of the corner of his eye, Ron can see that Harry is staring at him, but he refuses to meet the git’s gaze. His blood boils around his veins.
“She must be a good kisser then if she managed to keep Krum interested. Not exactly a looker, is she?” says Seamus, in between giggles.
Ron whips his head around to glare at Harry. Despite instigating this latest uproar, the specky git does nothing to stick up for their best friend. Their dorm mates are tearing apart Hermione’s honour right now, but Harry already has his nose buried back in that fucking map, tracing Draco’s path through the school. Harry is bloody obsessed with the Slytherin prick. He probably fucking fancies him.
“You can barely even see she has boobs when she’s in her jumper,” Dean agrees.
“Yeah, and don’t get me started on her hair.”
Neville frowns. “Now, come on, guys. I think you’re being a bit mean. Hermione’s alright.”
“Oohhh, she’s alright, is she?” Seamus rounds on Neville now.
Dean joins in, wiping his eyes. “Aww, that’s nice. At least someone likes her.”
No longer in control of his reactions, Ron jumps to his feet, trembling hands clenched at his sides.
“Enough!” he roars, loud enough so that everyone has their attention pinned on him. “Leave her alone! What the fuck has she ever done to you?” He gestures around the dormitory, daring any of them to speak up. “Don’t get her involved in your bullshit talk.”
“Oh, so it’s alright for us to discuss snogging your girlfriend, but not Hermione Granger?” Seamus slides off his bed, squaring up to Ron. “You need to work out where your loyalties lie. If Lavender found out, she wouldn’t be pleased.”
Ron eyes his friend, trying to determine if he should punch him. After a moment’s deliberation, he decides it’s not worth it. Ron is a prefect and is supposed to be setting a good example. Plus, there’d probably be a fight, and he isn’t sure he has the energy for that tonight. Seamus has a good right hook, after all.
“Fuck off.” Ron pushes past Seamus and strides towards the door, yanking it open. He leaves the dormitory without looking back, pulling the door closed behind him so hard, he’s sure everyone in Hogsmeade can hear the resounding thunk. The dormitory bursts into another round of hysterical laughter, fuelling Ron’s rage.
Taking the stairs two at a time, he reaches the common room with a loud huff, only to meet a startled Hermione at the foot of the staircase. Ron’s face floods with heat as she eyes him up and down, a disparaging look on her face.
“Ron, wh—”
He doesn’t give her the chance to finish her question.
“Leave me alone.”
Stomping towards the portrait hole, Ron barks at the Fat Lady to open without saying please, before heading out. He picks a random direction, then walks.
Fuck the lot of them.
Fuck his friends for being dicks about Hermione and girls in general. No wonder Harry wanted to keep out of it all. And fuck that specky git for not jumping to Hermione’s defence. Fuck Hermione for choosing now to break her months of silence, only to piss him off even more. But most of all, fuck his fucking feelings for making him react so defensively about the fucking witch in the first place. 
He’s never going to live this down, for fuck’s sake.
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brightwoods · 3 years
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Oh me? I’m just thinking about how even the characters who don’t have a problem with Alastair at this point (with the one exception of of Cordelia’s one comment to Thomas that was far tamer than things other characters say about him and that if it was going to be to Thomas couldn’t even be after Thomas threatened to throw him in the Thames right in front of her face at her wedding which was certainly worse) won’t say a word to defend him or even establish to people who do have a problem with him that they don’t
Like we’ve got
1. Cordelia who has never said a word about anything her friends have said about Alastair in front of him when they’ve been blatantly making snarky comments about him in front of her and she won’t even tell them not to say those things around her
She also never actually stood up for him in that one context with Thomas. She just asked if he just remembered that Alastair was her brother and at least she did say well he’s my brother and I love him but she still constantly excuses negative comments about him and never corrects them or says something about their comments in front of Alastair or even to him separately about it
Like it felt very well yeah he sucks but he’s my brother and I love him more than a defence
Also she never even said a simple that’s not the only good thing he’s done when Matthew eavesdropped on her private conversation with Alastair and then showed up with the backhanded comment like wow can you believe I happened to hear the only decent thing Alastair has ever said or done in his entire life when he very easily could have just talked about what he came there for instead of making comments at Alastair’s expense for his audience of only Cordelia who from what he’s seen doesn’t really seem to have a problem with any comments about Alastair in front of her
2. Thomas who used to annoy the hell out of his friends constantly going out of his way to interact with Alastair and ask about his feelings and treat him like a person but no longer did that after the Academy which yes is partly because of how his friends acted every time he mentioned Alastair or spoke to him but also Thomas is out here with feelings for Alastair and staying absolutely silent on the negative comments about him from other people instead of disagreeing or defending him or saying anything about not wanting to hear it
And then even worse, after he found out about the rumour he actively joined in and started talking shit about Alastair publicly whether Alastair was there or not... which yes, he was mad, I get that and it’s not like Alastair didn’t use to talk shit about him in front of other people
But the part that really gets me is that in the Sanctuary, Thomas never says anything to take those things back or to contradict any of the negative shit that’s the general consensus about him. He goes on about how much he wanted to hate Alastair and tried to and about how hot Alastair is and about how Alastair was always his secret and was his favourite part of his trip and he kisses him with no one around but he doesn’t really say anything that’s definitively about Alastair as a person beyond his physical appearance, sexuality, and availability
He basically said hey let’s pretend that no one else exists and Paris was the first time we met and make out so that we don’t have to think about any consequences or anyone outside or this room and then wondered why Alastair went oh your friends hate me, this isn’t possible once they were both free and all the evidence up to that point suggested that Thomas was still years past the point of sticking his neck out for Alastair in front of his friends no matter what his friends said and no matter how much he liked him
(He also did not say anything that we got to see after that about Alastair or to him in front of anyone else beyond trusting him in the fight with him and Christopher but then it was Thomas and other characters talking after with Alastair off on his own when Cordelia got there already again which we don’t have full context for but seems like Thomas went right back into his behaviour from before the sanctuary and before the rumour where he’s not saying things against Alastair and sure he’s tolerating him around other people but he’s also not saying anything in his favour or establishing that he doesn’t actively have a problem with Alastair and think he’s a horrible person anymore (which hopefully will come up with other characters later but at this point we have seen no hints of in what we saw of Thomas around other characters after the Sanctuary scene)
3. James who forgave Alastair and is willing to be civil and kind to him away from his friends and then just doesn’t really speak to or acknowledge him in front of his friends... and in front of other people tells Alastair that he had better treat Cordelia well or he won’t let him in their house or be civil to him anymore as it Alastair hadn’t been treating her well before that point and it was James’ warning that would inspire his behaviour around her
It’s also interesting how there’s silence or that in public but in private he will say that no one judges Alastair for his father’s drinking problem and will talk to him about Thomas and Matthew and giving them time
James seems to think Alastair deserves a chance but also has no intention of letting anyone else catch on that he thinks that even when Alastair tells him how he’s trying to make amends and he doesn’t know how to fix it if no one will let him apologize
Like sure James is over old things and is better than actively complaining about Alastair and being rude to him... but he also lets his friends say whatever they want about Alastair without ever saying a word about it, even when his friends are threatening his wife’s brother in front of her at their wedding
Sure, he has less obligation to speak up for Alastair, but also when he married into the family and then continues to listen to it constantly without even blinking at anything said about him is definitely worse than if he wasn’t married to Cordelia (and also I’m still including him even if he has a lot less obligation to speak up for him because he is still another person that’s like oh sure Alastair’s alright but don’t tell anyone I said that, I’m certainly not going to show that I’m on decent terms with him in front of anyone else)
4. And then obviously there was Charles who would never say anything remotely positive about him in front of anyone else and pretty much doesn’t acknowledge his existence around other people except for that time that he called him pathetic in front of Cordelia which yikes what a way to try to get an ex back, I wonder why it didn’t work...
5. And okay listen I know that Christopher is by no means the main issue at all and that he doesn’t really seem to have a problem with Alastair, but he very much follows along with what the other Merry Thieves think... like sure he won’t say anything against Alastair but he won’t say anything for him either or say anything about the constant comments the others make and it’s very clear in Chain of Iron that he entirely takes his cues for whether they’re tolerating and acknowledging Alastair or not from the other Merry Thieves where it’s like oh we have a problem with Alastair now... oh he got Thomas out and now Thomas is not ac to very threatening him so he must be alright to fight with okay...
Like Christopher doesn’t have an obligation to say anything about the way the others talk about him or anything when he doesn’t really have any ties to Alastair or reason to speak up but he is another character that’s like well I don’t have a problem with him but okay let’s all go along with this group mindset about him that at this point is just Matthew hating him so loudly that everyone goes oh okay we’re supposed to not like him and not stir the pot by saying anything to contradict that (and Thomas hating him just as loudly for a while before Christopher saw oh okay I think Thomas might be over it? which hopefully means Christopher’s going to be more likely to show that he’s willing to talk to Alastair and tolerate being around him during Chain of Thorns which it’s sad to say in this series is a high bar for how people treat Alastair even though that should be a the bar is on the floor moment)
And this post is way longer than I meant for it to get, but my point is that you know that Alastair thinks he still deserves having no one defend him or even show they’re okay enough with him to tolerate him when anyone else is around because at the Academy he didn’t defend anyone else and targeted other people that no one was standing up for just like he’s being targeted so it must be karma that even when he manages to claw his way up to people having a better opinion of him and not actively thinking that he deserves to be hated, those people still stay silent around and about him so that the only things said about him are still negative
And anyway if at least 4 characters don’t have an interaction with Alastair that isn’t negative and that isn’t when they’re alone with him or with just the Carstairs in Chain of Thorns then I am going to scream in rage for the rest of eternity
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Touch starved/ hurt reader - hcs or scenarios the turtles? Reader super cool regarding friendship, like funny and open etc etc, but if someone tries to do anything that implies a bit more regarding romantic stuff they are kinda like oop- no. Reader is kinda jumpy and just freezes when someone’s they like does any kind of affection ( blushes a lot, try to run away and avoid those situations) people have taken them for granted which has make them a bit cold and defensive in that area- they want to be more affectionate ( which they know deep down it’s what they crave) but it’s kinda they are a scared / angry cat? Please, hope this makes sense, thank you
( also regarding looks and gender I think you can go with they/them so everyone can see a look but if themselfs in the scenario, and if you are going to any kind of skin ship, make the reader extremely defensive over their arms and tummy pls, I do love hugs but if anyone touches my hips I’ll try to get away so fast omg sbbtjfjdkdksn and I will just close off momentarily, I absolutely hate it, I’m more on the heavy side ( talk and chubby ) and if anyone’s touches the “giggly” parts I get extremely upset ( because of how ppl havemade fun of it over the years) and I think the boys would be very “??? What?” To that reaction cuz they didn’t think it was some thing bad to have? ( like a more soft and chunky/chubby body) because they haven’t been exposed long enough to society’s judgment or beauty standards ( I mean they know about! The ones who would have read more about it maybe it’s Leo and Donnie, but what I mean maybe they have never experienced something like this - themselfs irl) Eitherway this ask is already so long omg I’m sorry and thank you, if it’s too much you don’t have to do it, have a good night/ day!)
Okay first of all I love you and I would die for you. You are a perfect human being and there is literally no one else like you. Your body does a damn good job of keeping all of your organs in place and that's what matters. If anyone tells you different you rock their absolute shit.
And don't worry, I understood the request perfectly so no worries on that, I've got a similar body type except I'm really short. But I'm also super defensive over being touched or having those parts of my body perceived, so trust me when I say you're not alone. We be vibing with this together.
Now to the writing!
TMNT Headcanons
Boys reacting to a touch starved/defensive reader
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Michaelangelo
Look man, our boy here is body positivity central, he thinks you look amazing and he wants everyone to know it
As far as you two go he's your best friend, your homie, your main man
So of course he's gonna wanna show you off, why wouldn't he?
He doesn't think you'd have a reason to not be okay with it, you've always been playful with him and his brothers
So obviously there's some widespread confusion once Casey gets tossed into the mix
All Mikey had done was reach behind him and snag you by the waist to pull you over
That was all
The words "and this is my best friend, y/n" never got the chance to leave his mouth
He was definitely not expecting you to squeak out in protest and scramble away from him as fast as humanly possible
Your face was burning red and you were clutching your sides, desperately trying not to bare your teeth in defence
Mikey couldn't help but feel heartbroken
Was there something wrong with him?
You sent Casey an unenthusiastic wave before turning on your heel and basically running out
Leaving a very confused orange turtle behind you
When he finally managed to catch up to you later you rushed to explain why you'd reacted the way you did
You couldn't stand his expression when you explained that no- you didn't think he was disgusting and no, he hadn't done anything wrong.
But he did seem baffled at you telling him that it was because you hated being touched there.
"Look Mikey, I've got no problem with the whole contact thing but you gotta give me a warning or something before you go around grabbing me. Okay?"
He was 100% fine with that
Anything to make you comfortable
But you both got to the point of being able to laugh at your reaction to the turtle trying to hold your hand
"Seriously Michaelangelo, I have a reputation to maintain. How am I supposed to do that when you're giving me feelings?"
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Donatello
It completely baffled him
By all accounts it didn't make sense
You threw around compliments like you were playing hot potato and for whatever reason you'd always find someway to playfully flirt with him
But the second one of his brothers suggested something other than the innocent friendship the two of you had you would shut down completely
And coincidentally those types of comments were made at the most inconvenient times
Nothing screamed awkward more than you going stone cold and standoffish over a piece of pie
Bubbly and excited one moment, tossing around those positive affirmations to your favorite people
And staring murderously at an inanimate object the next
You were like an unsolvable rubix cube to him
But he was determined to figure you out
"Y/N?"
You didn't appear to be busy, just sitting on the haphazard bunk in your makeshift area with a book in your lap
The others had gone out on patrol and you weren't sure where Splinter was at that particular moment which left you and Donnie holding down the lair until they got back
The perfect time to approach the subject
"Hey y/n? Can I ask you something?"
His voice always got a little louder when you were alone, less afraid of being overheard. You looked up with a smile
"Fire away Dove."
His cheeks flushed in surprise
"uhhhhh... whydoyounotlikeme?"
You set your book down and leaned forward to stare at him
"Elaborate."
And he did, god he did, he did it at the speed of sound of course, but you caught every word
let me tell you, this boys heart broke for you when you told him that you did like him
you really really did
but the thought of being romantically involved with anyone made you shut down
Donnie assured you that it was fine
he'd wait for you as long as you needed
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Raphael
Look, Raph knows a thing or two about being self conscious
out of all of his brothers he's the one who worries about his appearance the most
but you- holy shit he thinks you're the most amazing, perfect human in the world
so when he finds out that you hate being touched and that thinking about relationships makes your skin crawl he doesn't know whether to genuinely cry for you or punch someone in the mouth
both is okay
You'd always been very bold with your words and sometimes you'd even joke that you couldn't even tell when you were flirting with him
it just slipped out
and hearing that even though you could pull that off as easy as breathing and compliment all of them endlessly but you struggled to be comfortable in your own body?
that was a lot to unpack in one sitting
but the longer he sat with you and listened to you talk him through it the more he understood
sure, it was horrible
and he wouldn't likely stop thinking about hurting the people who'd done this to you (there'd be too many to count)
but you had a way of making him understand things
it was his favorite thing about you
"Uh- you know y/n, I uh- personally I think you look great. Like- all the time."
plz insert awkward finger guns here
there, your playful smirk was back and you were wiggling your eyebrows at him
"Awhhhh... is that Raph I see having feelings?"
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Leonardo
he'd done enough listening and reading to know how society treated people who it thought was different
and he hated that you'd had to experience that for most of your life
when it came down to it and he saw that you had become particularly hard on yourself he took it upon himself to check in with you
that's how you'd started meditating with him
and you'd found it quite relaxing if you were completely honest
Leo told you that meditation was the best way to connect with your body and understand it
you hoped that in time you would understand what he meant by that
but the positive affirmations were doing something, so you'd take it
he'd always encourage you when you couldn't yourself
and always jump to your defense when the others got a little to out of bounds with their words
you still would noticeably flinch when touched without warning
they were all working with that
and he still found himself saddened that you'd recoil back into your protective walls if anyone mentioned anything inherently romantic
but you were coming around
and he was endlessly proud of you for that
Alright I hope I was able to get down what you were thinking. This one definitely took the most contemplating out of any of the requests I've gotten so I hope you like it!
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jesswritesthat · 3 years
Note
you are such a good writer so i just know you’ll do justice to this. if you’d be willing, a small drabble about reader who tends to be quite standoffish w guys and just isn’t as close to them as compared to girls bc i remember being so stupid around my childhood crush and i’m pretty sure he hated me 😃 and then the guy i was friends w wouldn’t let me get too close to him bc he didn’t want people to think we’re “dating” n e ways let me shove my insecurities back down,,, but reader still loves watching romance anything bc someone unabashedly wanting to be around you like that?? can’t relate xx anyways it can be w any haikyuu guy, let the vibes come to you 🥰 thank you Jess love u 🥺
A/N: Hold up - THIS IS ME OMG! I feel you, I have terrible luck with romance but I find it so cute at the same time! I love you too, gorgeous anon, I hope I’ve done you justice 🥺
So allow me to kill some of those insecurities - or Oikawa will rather >:)
Warnings: cursing, fem reader
>>>>——————————>
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Anyone could admit Oikawa Tōru was enamouring, yet you only offered a shaky sigh as your friend tugged you along to meet her team. That’s what you get for befriending the future manager of Seijoh back in Middle School.
"Aren't you from Iwa-chans’ class?" An internal shriek caused your eyes to widen, snapping your head to the local celebrity tilting his toward you rather than his fangirls. 
"I'm surprised you remember." Snarky. Nice, you'd possibly regret it if not for his all-too-gentlemanly attitude. He’d only barged in searching for Iwaizumi a couple of times, you didn’t think he’d taken notes.
"Wouldn't forget a pretty face like yours." The smile was beautiful, even so you crossed your arms with a raised brow.
"Next time, try harder~"
"So mean (L/n)-chan."
You winced, your head screaming 'I know! God I know?! Why would I say that?!' but it was natural instinct at this point, a defence mechanism if you will, especially against someone as cunning as Oikawa Tōru.
In honesty, you believed that to be the start and end of it - except your friend encouragingly dragged you to her practices and Oikawa strategically managed to catch you alone every single time. Makki or Mattsun (you think) subtlety coined your friends focus for approximately 10 minutes, leaving you laxly waiting for her to rejoin you. In fact with the consistency at which it occurred, you’d become friends with the Captain.
———
Only you’d let your guard down once, the team required managerial help meanwhile you got settled playing a romantic film on your phone. Immediately you were distracted, softness leaking to your features whilst muffled hopeless sighs of endearment were hummed in acknowledgment.
“That’s an unusual sound from you~”
“He just gave her a rose and they kissed in the rain, how could I not - shit!” It was a subconscious answer due to enthralment, the haunting voice only resonating mid-way through your justification causing you to shockingly snap around to Tōru watching from over your shoulder with a smug grin. You’d almost dropped your phone!
“Don’t stop now (Y/n)-chan, tell me how to get you to make that sound again. It’s cute.”
“No- no way! Get back to practice Oikawa - go do a jump serve or something!”
“Oh? So you do listen when I talk about Volleyball!”
———
It wasn’t until after their next practice match did you suffer his infuriating (yet admittedly appreciated) presence again. This time the brunette proudly standing by your side as he shared his views of the match with you - the burning gazes of his fans deadlocked on the two of you as if deciphering the DaVinci code.
"Maybe you should um - y'know, not be so close?"
A careful roll of your shoulder accompanied your hesitant claim, the close proximity allowing for the small movement to graze his left side. Oikawa shot you a perplexed look, leaning closer to your face out of spite - even if his inquiry was subtlety sincere.
"Why? You don't like it?"
"No - I mean yes - I just..." A sigh of defeat escapes as you run a hand through your hair before meeting his warm hues again. "People might think you care and I wouldn't want you to have to deal with rumours."
Tōru was unnervingly quiet, he would’ve took a step back if you’d asked, however this reasoning was ridiculous by his standard. Darkened irises scanned over your casual frame with fingers pressed against his chin in thought.
"What if I want people to think that? I mean it's true, isn't it~"
"Is it?"
A melodic chuckle echoes your sarcastic suspicion, the heartthrob of Seijoh nudging your arm with a charming smile that’d leave fans fainting at his feet.
"Am I not obvious enough for you (Y/n)-chan?"
"You're obvious to everyone - in fact you're probably nicer to your fans than you are to me. Hence why I'm hesitant to believe you."
It was beyond comprehension to think one of the most popular men in Miyagi be romantically interested in you, which is why taking the flirtatious antics of Oikawa was done with a pinch of salt.
“Hmm... in that case I’ll show you...” You hadn’t a moment to determine his intentions, not when he’d firmly hooked your wrist and dragged you out to the refreshing Spring showers currently hydrating Miyagis’ cherry blossoms that day.
“By getting me wet?!”
“Eventually maybe - ah, that’s not it though.” Only smirking at the death glare pointed at him due the insinuation, Tōru washed it away with the gentle caress of his palms either side of your jaw. You knew his hands were magic but this was surreal - a thumb brushed your cheekbone before his lips met with your forehead, his nose then skimmed to meet yours with a genuinely content smile ghosting his features.
“T-tōru?” Breathless surprise, that’s all you could muster with the rain trickling down your skin onto his delicate fingers. He’d never seen you so defenceless, and he’d wanted more of it.
“I actually like that sound better than your longing sighs, say it again for me, won’t you?” You’d pulled from him with that, your fingers lacing his wrists - to which the Setter fluently twisted and captured your hands in his own causing you to furrow your brows once again.
“Shut up, you’re not funny.”
A defeated sigh left him, eyes briefly closed in surrender prior to fluttering open with renewed admiration for you, mildly unwilling to admit the sentimentality underlying his actions. Sentimentality tailored to you and for only you.
“I know it’s not a passionate kiss in the rain like in the movies, the ones you like so much. But I’ll willingly, happily try - we can get to that if you want to go on a date with me?“
“Are you serious? Don’t you h-“
“I don’t want them, I want you. The person who lets her friends drag her to games she didn’t want to attend, who helps in practice despite not needing to, the girl who got to know the real me, and the one who looks really cute watching romantic movies~”
“I don’t know her but, I suppose there’s no harm in going out with you once Oikawa.” The witty response caused him to laugh along with you, expecting nothing less.
“Perfect - but my hair is gonna be ruined, can we go back inside now (Y/n)-chan?”
Rolling your eyes at his petty whining, you couldn’t hide the overflowing amusement in your laugh as you pushed him back into the gymnasium where his team (and your friend) sported expectant grins.
<——————————<<<<
[ Masterlist ]
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foriland · 3 years
Note
12 with Dick, Jason and sensory overload and /or noise sensitivity, for the angst prompt? 👀 ♥
Prompt 12: “Don’t! Just, stop. Stop talking.”
Hope this hits what you wanted Gem! <3
Warning for mild-ish panic attack.
--------
Jason’s ears were ringing as he brushed away his family’s concerns. He’s fine, he tried to convince them. He really was. Just because Joker was part of an Arkham breakout doesn’t mean that he would automatically have a panic attack. He’s not that pathetic. He just needed some time to himself.
If only Dick wasn’t blocking his way and Tim and Damian weren’t arguing somewhere in the Cave.
The latest Arkham breakout has set Joker, Scarecrow and Ivy on the loose, the latter two had already been rounded up earlier which only left the clown himself. And Jason was not freaking out. His heart was just running a bit too fast was all, lingering effects of that mild fear toxin that had managed to pushed through the cracks in his helmet. But no one knew that, and no one had too. The thing was diluted enough to hardly affect him at all.
Damian was yelling  from his place at the showers, “I could have had him if you-”
“If I hadn’t saved your head?” One could hear the eyes roll in Tim’s voice.
“If you hadn’t tried to put your nose where you shouldn’t!”
Jason could tell that it was just their regular banter, even if they started to call each other some... undesirable words. That was just how they bond.
He rubbed his palm over his ear to hopefully stave away the panic in his chest and ringing in his ears. His other hand was busy trying to literally brush Dick away from him. This guy really needed to learn personal space.
“Jay, c’mon. You were hit by the gas, weren’t you?” Welp, so much for no one knowing. “Just stay for a while and let us look you over.”
Jason shook his head. “No no. Just get off me, Dick.”
Dick was apparently stubborn tonight and Jason was too tired and frayed to try to be intimidating. “No. Jason, please.”
Jason bit his tongue as he heard Damian screaming something in response to Tim’s ‘friendly’ insult. Control your breathing, he repeated to himself, control your breathing. “Fine. I’ll stay at the manor,” he bargained. “Happy?”
Dick wasn’t. “Jason, are you hiding an injury from us?”
“No-”
“Then please just let us check-”
Jason barely suppressed a flinch, breath stuttering for a moment as there was a loud slam from Tim and Damian’s argument followed by Bruce’s loud “Enough!” stopping the fight.
Apparently, he wasn’t subtle enough for Dick, whose eyes sharpened. “Jay something’s wrong.” Like he didn’t already know that. He had been having this problem since he was a kid! “Are you sure-”
His panic finally snapped into anger as he snarled, “Yes, Dick. I am fine. And I will continue to be so if. You. Move.”
Dick seemed stupefied enough to not stop Jason this time and he marched up the stairs to the grandfather clock, rounding it before running to his temporary room. At least he tried.
Energy seemed to have left his as soon as he reached the bedroom corridor, panic seizing up his throat. He dug his nails into his palms as he pressed down on his ears. There was still screaming, yelling- laughing- talking- voices just echoing into his ears no matter what he tried. He sucked in a breath as he pressed himself into a dark corner- he didn’t know where, he didn’t care.
He never understood why he always had panic attacks when this happens. Why his throat always closed up whenever his family fight, even if it was a playful banter that just sounded vicious. It had been happening even when he was still living with Willis and his mom.
In his defence, he had been getting better at controlling it, learning how to counter it, how to best calm himself down without attracting any sort of attention to himself. No one had ever notice it even if he was there, on the verge of a panic attack, because they didn’t need to know. He didn’t want them to. And it wasn’t his fault that he lost control this one time, it was the mild fear toxin slightly messing up his brain.
He swallowed another gulp of air, willing the ringing and yelling in his ear to just stop as he pulled himself up, stumbling to his temporary room. He fumbled to turn the doorknob, leaning against the doorframe before walking in. He didn’t get to close the door, however, as Dick was suddenly there following him in. Lips were moving but Jason couldn’t make out the words. There was just voices and yelling getting louder and louder-
Dick was holding his arms, blue eyes wide with concern and- It wasn’t supposed to be this way- Dick wasn’t supposed- No one was supposed to know. And Dick was still talking and-
“Don’t!” Jason blurted out, pulling back deeper into the darkness of his room, hoping that the darkness would bring him comfort today. It always was a hit and miss ever since he came back to life.
He finally was able to catch Dick’s words over the piercing ringing and echo in his mind. “Jay, it’s alright. It’s just me.”
He shook his head, willing Dick to understand. To just stop talking. He wasn’t experiencing a flashback. He’s just... He didn’t really know what was wrong with him. But he’ll be fine as soon as Dick stop talking and leave him alone.
“Little Wing, come here... fine... the manor, remember... okay...”
What little control he was starting to have over himself spiralled back out. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to just ignore. He’s with no one, hearing no one, seeing no one.
Except for Dick. Who was still there. Talking, blabbering.
“Shut up!” Jason finally snapped, a sob fighting its way out of him.
Luckily, Dick did.
Jason sucked in a breath, once, twice, thrice. His mind had started to clear slightly. The full impact of the knowing that Dick just saw him panicking tried to take his control away but he ignored it.
He felt hands on his arms, raised to press his palms into his ears, fingers clawing at his hair.
“Jay-”
“Don’t,” Jason cut him off, eyes opening to see Dick’s; wide, uncertain and concerned. “Just... stop. Stop talking. Don’t.”
Dick visibly swallowed, and Jason took that as a sign that Dick would stop making any sort of noises, as he turned away to his bed, dropping heavily onto the mattress. He pulled up his legs to his chest resting back against the headboard as he took another deep breath, closing his eyes and letting the panic subside. He could really use a cigarette right now. Too bad he was trying to stop smoking for his family’s sake. No need for them to suffer second-hand smoking, especially since he’s hanging around them so much now.
Dick had never been the one to sit still as he, predictably, started to approach him, albeit slowly, feet making only the slightest shuffle across the wooden floor, the sound purposely done for Jason’s sake. The mattress dipped slightly as Dick sat in front of him.
He cracked an eye open to his brother staring at him, lip pulled slightly between his teeth, nervous. And Jason’s automatic reaction to people staring at him after of during his panic attacks, was anger. He sometimes hated himself for it. “What?” he snapped.
Dick’s eyes flickered with a flinch. “What happened? Are you okay?”
Jason scowled. “I said I was fine, didn’t I?” He didn’t want to have this conversation with anyone, much less Dick.
“That- That wasn’t just fine, Jason.”
“So what? I freaked out, big deal. Not the first time, Goldie, and it ain’t gonna be the last.”
“But, Jay-”
“Forget that happened, Dick. Just go, leave me alone and let me sleep.” Jason rested his forehead onto his knees as he wrapped his arms loosely around his legs. He was tired, exhausted. But he’d be lying if he said that he could sleep right now. But a little lie had never hurt anyone. Not always.
There was a sigh. “I’m not leaving, Jay. I’m not. You’re obviously not fine and... it’s okay to not be and ask for help.”
“I don’t need help,” Jason mumbled, trying to ignore the cornered-trapped feeling in his chest. “I’m fine.”
He felt Dick shifting across the bed to rest beside him, the warmth and comfort of his brother was inviting. “Jason, can you at least tell me what is going on?”
No!, Jason wanted to scream. But he didn’t. He didn’t even realise he was talking until the words were falling out of his mouth and he couldn’t stop them. “I don’t know. I just get... freaked out when there are loud noises, voices specifically. I don’t know why but it always just... happens.”
Dick was quiet for a moment, and small, younger part of Jason was scared, of judgement, of disapproval, of rejection. “Is it just any... voices?”
Jason gave a half-hearted shrug. “Not really. Generally, it is when... you guys fight. Or even sometimes when you all are joking around and I... feel it. I never had a problem when patrolling, though, even before I died.”
“You mean this had been happening even before... How long has it been, Jay?”
“I don’t know.” He lifted his head to rest his chin on his knees, staring at the door they had left open. He hoped his other siblings hadn’t seen him earlier. He hoped Bruce hadn’t. “It’s been happening for as long as I can remember.”
“Anything I can help you with? Like... Can I do anything to help you with it?”
With another shrug he mumbled, “I don’t know.” Other than stop talking when Jason tells him to and leaving him alone when he wanted it, there really wasn’t much Dick could do.
“Can you at least tell me whenever you-”
He scoffed, finally turning to Dick. “And tell the whole family that I am more problematic than they think? That I cannot hold my head together just because someone decided to talk louder than a normal volume?”
“No, Jason. That’s not what I meant. Just... I cannot always tell whether or not you are... affected by something. Just do something to tell me if you are ever feeling overwhelmed. A signal, something.
Or maybe you can just pay more attention to your surroundings, Jason didn’t say. Instead, he breathed a quiet, “Okay.”
“Thank you,” was Dick’s unexpected reply. There was a beat, before he asked again, “Can I... hug you?”
Jason found himself giggling, a soft laughter flooding out of him. He understood and appreciated the gesture, but a lot of permission-asking in this family still amused him. “Of course, dimwit.”
His own smile was reflected on Dick, who did a gentle version of tackling him and Jason let himself be dragged under the sheets, Dick’s array of limbs cocooning him, for once making him feel safe, protected.
A thought struck him and he glanced at the door. Huh, when did it close? Who closed it?
He couldn’t pay it much attention as Dick’s fingers were starting to comb his hair. He hated and loved that his family knew just what he liked. His eyes closed as he felt Dick pressing a quick kiss to his forehead and he was too tired to protest the childish action, only burrowing into his brother’s shoulder.
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I have a head cannon that when technoblade becomes friends with someone he braids their hair he's so far done it to Tommy philza and ranboo but only philza knows why
This is such a good prompt thanks! I went a little overboard and added a lot of my own hc's, hope that’s okay! Quick note I’m not past exile yet so my apologies if bedrock bros and just Ranboo in general are slightly inaccurate
When Philza met Techno, Techno was only a child, barely even able to talk, sitting dead-eyed in the ruins of a piglin village, hiding under the rubble in the hopes he wouldn’t be spotted. Philza, of course, being Philza, basically immediately adopts him.
Philza tried his best, he really did, but this was in the middle of a war, and Philza didn’t really know that child soldiers aren’t the best thing (he never quite learnt that, honestly). Techno learnt to fight before he learnt to read.
When Techno was young, he always had his hair cut short and out of his face, but he really liked the small side braid that Philza always wore in his hair. He had started to grow it out a bit, but not long enough to braid, by the time he became the vessel of the Blood God.
Short side note, he and Philza were fighting against a cult, and they’d managed to capture Techno and brand the sigil of the God into his flesh allowing the Blood God to make Techno his champion. Needless to say, the cult was near immediately completely wiped out after this process was complete, but also Technoblade wasn’t exactly super thrilled with all this.
Along with the more obvious changes- glowing, blood-red eyes, growing to almost nine feet tall, an insatiable desire for a good fight, and the constant voices ringing in his head, the growth of his hair was barely noticeable. Sure, it touched the floor and regrew rapidly when cut, but it seemed to mystically never get in his way during combat.
During combat being the operative sentence. Even if it isn’t life threatening, constantly tripping over your own hair when you’re still trying to get used to being a good two feet taller than usual and the voices in your head constantly mocking you for it.
This is when Techno gets the idea to braid it, like Philza does! The issue is, he doesn’t know how to braid hair, and he’s been so terrified of accidentally hurting Philza with all of his changes that he’s been avoiding him best he can, so his attempts fail horribly.
Meanwhile, Philza's very concerned that Techno's started avoiding him. He’s actually really frightened that Techno hates him now, since as the champion of the Blood God, with the voices of it’s angels in his head now, he might well view all other gods as enemies, and Philza, as not only the most esteemed angel but the husband of the goddess Kristin, would be included in that.
Still, he was very concerned about how Techno was avoiding him, and eventually came into Techno's room to have a talk with him, and he walked in on one of Techno's honestly awful attempts at braiding his own hair.
Philza offers to help braid Techno's hair, and during this they have a long, long conversation about both of their worries. Techno reassures Philza that he doesn’t hate him (or Kristin, for that matter), and Philza reassures Techno that he’s not going to lose control. The voices decide that Philza is pretty pog, actually, and chill out a bit. Overall, it’s just a massive relief for everyone.
After this, Philza starts teaching Techno how to braid his hair. It’s a slow process- especially since braiding nine feet of hair is an ordeal- but it’s one of the few moments of peace in the Angel of Death and the champion of the Blood God's life. Once Techno learnt how to braid hair, he started braiding Philza's too. The two of them knew what it meant. I trust you, unconditionally, and without fail.
Hundreds of thousands of years pass. Nations rise and fall, legends are made, but Philza and Techno stick by each other’s side throughout it all. They maintain the tradition of braiding each other’s hair. Techno does not do it with anyone else, but Philza does it with whatever random of assortment of children is under his wing at the specific time. Techno can’t quite understand the mans attachment to whatever orphan he finds on the street. Even the ones who don’t die in the battlefield die too soon, and he can’t understand how you could let yourself go through the heartbreak of seeing their inevitable demise.
He doesn’t expect the latest batch to be any different. Sure, one's Philza's biological kid, so he’d theoretically be able to survive indefinitely, but he’s a creative type who’s so inept with a sword Techno's certain he’ll perish the second a war comes around. One's a failed clone of Philza, but the hybrid and human DNA he was given to stabilise him made him a mess of instincts with atrophied wings and constant sickness. And while the shine in the ram-boys eyes shine with an energy that's definitely a sign of some relation to the older species, everything else about him suggests a regular child who’ll pass and die in maybe a hundred years tops.
Still, when he receives a letter from Wilbur about a rebellion, Techno was excited to go. More for the fun of combat and of course overthrowing a tyrant, but he can’t help but feel proud of the boy he remembered once trying to pick up a sword blade-end becoming a capable general.
He honestly developed a respect for Tommy and Tubbo during Pogtopia. They were so young, and already capable warriors. He felt they were naive, with their talk about restarting a government, but held hope in them that they’d realise that anarchy would be preferable.
Still, they drifted apart, in no short part due to being pressured into canonically killing Tubbo and non-canonically killing Tommy. Techno would never admit it, but the anger in Tommy's eyes and the fear in Tubbo's whenever he was around stung a bit.
His few interactions with Tommy after the sixteenth lead him to believe that the boy didn’t want anything else to do with him, so he was surprised to find the boy shivering under his house, bruised and eerily quiet in comparison to the Tommy he was used to who would never stop talking.
The Blood God may be more traditionally thought of as a god of combat, of killing and of blood shed by violence, but that’s only scratching the surface of the Blood God's dominion. It is also a god of anarchy, of freedom, of vengeance, and of protecting those who cannot protect themselves. And as a champion of the Blood God, Techno would have hesitated throwing out even someone he despised in those circumstances, but Tommy? There was no way he wouldn’t have helped him, despite how much he grumbled and groaned (that, at least, was easier than admitting attachment).
Techno tries, he really does. But he mistakes bruises and scars caused by cruel hands to the ones a younger Tommy came home with on accident due to his frailness, the possessiveness of the man who hurt him as he came in search as him as overbearing concern instead of obsession. He chalks up confused feelings to some awful accident, unwilling to pry in the clearly distressed child's business (and while he doesn’t want to admit it, he doesn’t want to think that Dream, his friendly rival for thousands of years, might be truly a monster.)
The first time Techno offered to braid Tommy's hair, he didn’t even realise what he offered until he’d already said it. Tommy was just sat, shivering, despite being curled up in one of Techno's cloaks in front of the fire, and Techno'd noticed how Tommy's long hair always got in his face, and he kept raising a shaking hand to push too long hair out of his face, and Techno couldn't help but be reminded of himself long ago, scared to leave his room and dealing with hair far too long for for himself.
That’s not to say he had any regrets, though.
Techno braided Tommy's hair every day after that. Honestly, on the days where he wasn’t shaking bad enough that he couldn’t braid his own hair it sort of annoyed Tommy- he felt a bit like he was being pitied, and that’s something he absolutely can’t fucking stand, but Techno's pity was far, far preferable to being back with Dream, watching the light slowly drain from his eyes in the reflection in the water every day, so he stayed quiet.
After Tommy's betrayal, Techno felt hurt- far, far more hurt than he’d ever found himself before. He’d given the boy his unconditional trust- showed it to him, every day, and Tommy couldn’t even show enough trust to stay by him.
The first time he saw Tommy after, still wearing a braid in his hair, a mockery of friendship, he punched through the walls in his home afterwards. Anger hurt less than sorrow, so he stewed in it, refusing to admit he still cared about the boy at all.
As such, it took him a long time to even braid his own hair, let alone anyone else’s. It was something that was safe, and now just reminded him of a boy who used his kindness and left it unrepaid.
The first person he started braiding the hair of again was Philza, not long after this. It was Philza, and Techno doubted he could lose trust in the man, even if he flat out stabbed him in the back quite literally. Philza was much closer to a friend than a father, but he was still the closest thing to family Techno had ever known.
Eventually though, somehow another boy managed to sneak past his defence. Ranboo was awkwardly tall and quiet with a crown and inexplicably good fighting skills, and Techno couldn’t help but like the boy who reminded him so much of himself. He supposes this is probably the closest he'll ever get to understanding Philza and his children.
Still, it takes a while for him to feel safe and comfortable braiding Ranboo's hair for him- as far as he was aware, Ranboo almost never had it loose out of the braid it was already in, anyway. The last time he trusted someone who reminded him of himself, it only hurt.
Eventually, though, Technoblade came around. Ranboo had just come out of one of his weird sleepwalking states, hair a mess and very distressed. Honestly, he wasn’t even sure if the kid had enough memory to know who he was, but he relaxed as Techno braided his hair and talked about nothing in particular.
Now, as Technoblade's founded the Syndicate, he's grown a little more comfortable showing affection to others, especially Philza and Ranboo. Niki's a little new, but Techno knows that someday soon he'll trust her enough to braid through her hair, and put his trust in her completely.
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sly-merlin · 4 years
Text
Killing Me - 3 | n.y
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pairing : law student!reader + yuta
genre :    angst , mafia au/ arranged marriage au , smut
warnings : curse words, mention of murder, guns, knives. smut and drinking.
new entries : yugyeom, jungkook , wonwoo
words : 4.2k 
summary : “life’s never fair y/n. realise it as soon as you can . it is the only secret for living a regretless life.”
                                              or
                  curiosity got the cat hitched!
K.M masterlist
prev    next
 taglist ::t :: (not tagging the old ones because they have read it already bt if u want , lemme know! )  @yiyi4657​​ @sorrywonwoo​​ @sillywinnergladiator​​  @suhweo​​ @exfolitae​ @minejungwoo​
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{ 11:15 }
Look before you leap. Had you remembered the saying, you’d not be sitting in front of a mafia boss, regretting your former imprudent actions. Taeyong was sitting on a high back executive chair, aura screaming authority, his high and mighty self, making you feel inferior. His eyes bore into yours as if he could read your soul with his intense gaze.
Your stare equally harmonized with his fierce one.
A loud fake cough from someone interrupted you from ogling at the boss. He indeed looked like a feast, anyone would falter! Getting your much needed attention at this point, taeyong dismissed others from his office with a flick of his hand. The only ones to stay behind in the vicinity of the four walls were you, taeyong and a blue haired man. Out of all, he looked most annoyed with your presence.
“Jaehyun, sit down, it’s going to take a while.” taeyong directed him and the man occupied the empty seat beside you. You could already feel him eyeing you down.
“Miss y/n. I’m not going to beat around the bush. So, listen sensibly.”
Your blood ran cold at his cold and blank declaration. The fierceness of his eyes was seeping through his words making you cower in your position. Your firm resolve to fight for your life was already breaking down and this was just a start.
“I know this is too sudden and It’s normal being apprehensive of this situation but you are not on a very strong front here. Marry yuta or - you know the consequences. And I don’t want you to choose on impulse. This is going to be your last opportunity, so be wise! Nobody wants to die y/n and you certainly don’t! I have a proposal for you. It’s for your own good but if you still decides against me, I promise I’ll grant your last wish without any hesitance and believe me, I always keep my word” he finished, placing his gun on the table to prove his point. You nodded briefly after taking in everything. He continued-
“You will marry yuta, say by the end of this week. But as you sign the registration papers, I’ll provide you the ownership of 3 exclusive properties in gangnam with only one small, harmless condition. You’ll hold title not as miss y/l/n but as Mrs Nakamoto. Moreover, you won’t have to do any job. Your living expenses, all will be managed from our side. Yuta alone is capable of providing you a black card. You can live hassle free. A house, security, what else could anyone want! You won’t have to change a thing in your life. Think of it as an up-gradation.”
You felt like being kicked in the teeth. This man was trying to bargain your whole future with his riches.
“Sounds promising?” He enquired. You pondered over what he said to find any single error to turn the tables but that was out of question until you knew his demands fully. And it wasn’t very promising. when did choosing between life and death became so difficult!
“You can’t assure me my freedom! connecting me with neos is more like booking a room for me to rotten in jail. The security you are talking about is for you I guess. And yuta is more like a noose for me. I’ll be dead one way or another” you uttered, releasing the air you were holding while speaking.
You heard jaehyun snort beside you.
“Your safety will be my top priority and yes, you will be associating with neos, but that is something you don’t need to be worry about. For the outer world, you will be the wife of yuta”.
“What difference would it make?” his explanations going beyond your head.
“Let me explain like this. Have you ever seen a neo member’s face prior to this or heard anyone getting caught?”
“I guess no.”you answered without hesitation.
“Neos doesn’t have faces .…but these faces do have names for commoners like you.”
“You mean double-life?”
“Have you ever heard of moon industries?”
“Who doesn’t have? Moon industries are the 3rd biggest sponsors and investers for almost everything in Korea.”
“Yeah, yuta works there. Anything clicks for you?
You refuse with motion of your head.
“You’ll not be marrying yuta from neos but nakamoto yuta who works in moon industries. Like that, you won’t be getting in any trouble . A legitimate life. You can do anything you want except open your pretty mouth”. 
you didn’t like being called that!
“I don’t understand, you said nobody knows you people then what am I even doing here. How that officer did even recognise yuta. I shouldn’t even be here, if your identities are so hidden.”
“See jaehyun, I told you she’s more than just book smart. Listen y/n, mafia doesn’t work like the way you might be thinking. We can’t spill everything to you even if you decide to die the very next moment.
It was hard to believe that he planned all of this while you were held captive, within 9 hours. Taeyong was extremely meticulous and expeditious as well. But there was one more question left and you knew he couldn’t answer it. Nothing came without flaws afterall!
“Why are you being so ‘generous’ to me? My bio data of few pages can’t make you trust me so definitely. You are practically giving me an offer to rant you all to police. I’m sure you don’t grease the palms of all officers and if I-
“Me and you both know that you won’t do it unless you are fed up with your life and that would leave to start de novo!” his words indicated conclusiveness, his raised brows challenging you to refuse him. For now his surety signalled safety, but you still had one defence left or as everyone called it – a plea. It was better to beg than to be between Scylla and Charybdis.
“Is there no other way. I promise you with my life I won’t ever say anything. You can put spies over me or do whatever you want to keep a check on me.” your desperation to fight for your life was evident in your appeal.
“Yes! There is one more solution!” jaehyun chimed, facing you from his seat. He was grinning eye to eye. “We can sell you to an underground escort ring where you’ll happily live until you die and there’d be no neo or yuta or police or career. I’m sure you are shrewd enough to survive there”. nobody mentioned this before!
“If you can’t shut your mouth, then leave jaehyun.” taeyong scolded and he went back to his original position. Jaehyun seemed to be enjoying your state. He hit you with harsh reality you were still unaware of. Maybe,you were really on their mercy now,
“He is joking right?”
“No, he is telling the truth but I want you to make a choice. That hell-hole is not for someone like you. You can do better. Take this as a shortcut to a nice life.”
“How can I believe that you won’t be putting me in the some escort ring as he said to shut my mouth?”
“If I wanted, you won’t be sitting here anymore.”he deadpanned
You were silent. Your mind went blank. No words came to grace your lips. You were trapped and though there were plenty of options, there was none for you. Either you live and marry yuta or die. There was no other way to live.
“And what if my life doesn’t turn out all good?” you asked timidly.
“Then I’ll let you leave. And without any condition”
Finally some hope. You could leave. You would definitely leave.
“Is yuta okay with it?”
“His position is not better than yours.”
“I’m not going to leave university then.”
“Suit yourself! Just don’t convert yourself into a nuisance for us.”
You nodded with head hanging low. You had been beating the air till now, which resulted in nothing but defeat. Taeyong got what he wanted in the end.
“Call jaemin and haechan. Before she goes home, we need to give her a gift. And you made a good choice, you won’t regret it, take my word for it.”
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[1 p.m]
Twelve hours has passed. As you were walking towards your dorm, you pinched yourself several times but your reality was now a nightmare from which you’d never wake up. Defeated, you entered your dorm only to lie down in the bed, to regret your life decisions. Graciously, chelin was out till midnight with her boyfriend, so you had all the time in the world. The last 12 hours kept playing in your head like a broken record. You were happy in the club drinking yesterday. if maybe you’d not left them behind, you’d still be incharge of your life game. then that police officer, living off of some mafia group, doyoung , johnny,jaehyun , taeyong and him, the source of your plight. You were suddenly feeling like a kite which till now was flying freely in the air but its thread was now in the grasp of someone who wanted to tie you down by the same, if you think of it, the scales were never balanced! You were always at the losing end. Beggars are never the choosers after all. Sleep unknowingly took over your tired limb while you were wallowing in self-pity.
A ping.
The notification of a text woke you up from your peaceful sleep. You were out for about 4 hours but it felt good as your head was no more pounding. The text was from Jungkook about a party his friend group was organising to celebrate the upcoming finals. they were just partying yesterday with you and now this.
Another ping.
Same text from yugyeom. You sighed in frustration.
Both of your best friends lived in the same place and were always joined by the hip and you were sure they were together at the moment as well but where there’s a question to annoy you, they won’t let the opportunity pass.
You deliberated about telling them everything but you refrained as taeyong’s threat was not a gun without bullet. He warned you before coming and you were supposed to keep your mouth shut. It was better to keep them away from trouble. You were extremely alone.
Another ping.
They were asking about your whereabouts. You never informed them you reached home yesterday. Their worry was visible through their multiple scolding motherly texts. You would have laughed at their antics but your own humorous state rendered you incompetent to feel any joy.
It was not difficult to make them believe that you overslept as everyone knew your shitty professors treated you more like a slave and less like their researcher. But refusing to meet them and declining free alcohol was making them sceptical. You had no option other than going but you’d be anywhere than at a party right now. But maybe some commotion of drunk university students and blasting music could take your thoughts away for some time.
However, first there was another task to be taken care of! You searched ‘Moon Industries’ on naver. There were numerous articles praising their new successful new ventures. You opened their official website, the list of board of directors and associates was not too long. The photo of head director looked too familiar. Maybe it was that short man. And then him. There was no photo but his name was written just few places below moon tail.  Taeyong was not bluffing. Nakamoto was an important name and maybe everyone there was, however, it was beyond your intellect as how they managed to do it. There was no way out now. One thing that wasn’t adding up was the properties .your brainwaves couldn’t find a conclusion to those. There was no reason for him to do that when you weren’t left with any choice ultimately. Maybe you’ll find out tomorrow.
You got out of clothes that adorned your body since yesterday. Their smell was enough to make you gag. How could someone fell asleep in these! The cold water of the shower eased your mind fairly. Your eyes were drooping again but sleeping would do you no good. You could run away from your problem like everybody else. Just this once. After showering, you took a brief look at your wardrobe. It was just a college party, with same people so dressing up to impress them was out of tone for you. Not that you were dolling up anyways. You could just wear your pyjama and still outshine any flashy titties out there. At least that’s what kookie and gyeom had been feeding you till now. You took out a black full sleeve v- neck blouse with white shorts. It hugged your upper body tightly leaving just enough space for some air. You looked good and felt good too. Being in no mood to do makeup, you opted for a nude lip to complete your look. You wore the bracelet that you were not supposed to part with but out of habit, you had removed it earlier to shower. Now it adorned your wrist again. It was a band. A gift by taeyong. The bracelet was a tracking device, not that jaemin wasn’t hacking your phone already but they needed to be double sure, just in case. Not like you were going to rant them out. you felt like Taeyong’s threatening voice would never leave your ears.
Yugyeom’s call replaced the voice. They were already waiting for you. You decided to drown yourself in alcohol for one day and enjoy with your friends. The party was at nearby club situated at 10 min distance. Your dorm was nearer to the gates so it was always easy to go out. Slipping into your shoes, you made your way out.
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“You will regret this, taeyong” though yuta didn’t show in front of you in basement, he was furious at taeyong for making his life decisions. “First her and now this! the mistake I made was not that big. Slip ups happen with everyone here, including you. So why it’s only me, who’s getting –
“Not a slip up but a blunder yuta” taeyong fumed at him. “Last time, mark almost died because of you. It was my mistake I let it slide. You aren’t getting any more chances. My decision is final” his voice went deeper as he spoke.
“I regret it tae, you know it” his voice filled with guilt. “But don’t feed me the lies. This is not the only reason you’re doing this for. There is something you aren’t telling us”
“There might be. But you already know what you need to! So celebrate your month long vacation. Go to work with taeil hyung. She’s coming tomorrow again and we’ll discuss other matters with her. Be present here. Don’t disappear like you did in the morning.”
Yuta huffed and decided to leave instead of wasting his time on his leader.
“And leave your gun here”
“WHAT NOW?”
“Don’t shout and leave your gun. Corporates don’t carry guns in this country.” taeyong replied calmly, almost in a mocking tone. Yuta removed the gun from holster and handed it to taeyong before turning towards the door.
“Other one as well” taeyong demanded with a smirk.
“Huh, now you’ll ask for my dagger as well!” yuta sneered at him while removing the other pistol from back of the pants.
“I’m not that cruel, yu. Keep your sweetheart with you. It’ll remind you of the absence of your other toys.”. “And don’t forget. Tomorrow at 4. sharp.”
Instead of responding, yuta showed him a middle finger before actually going out.
Mark was standing at the end of the hallway, waiting for yuta already.
“What happened hyung?” he asked curiously.
“Nothing. You are going to be the best man in my wedding” yuta replied nonchalantly. But mark knew there was more to it. Yuta won’t settle down just because he was told to!
“To her?”
“Yeah, who else. Taeyong is getting short on his brain. We might need to replace him soon” he joked but mark could see right past him.
“Hyung. What are you thinking?” he asked cautiously in a scared tone.
“Ruin her life. I’ll make her regret being alive.”
And yuta walked away, leaving worried mark behind him. He didn’t go after him. He knew better not to.
The party was at full blast when you reached. It was always a nice change watching studious snu students washing away their worries. Your soulmates were nowhere to be found but you spotted chelin sitting with her friends on the stairs. It seemed like everyone who knew was there. Your classmates, juniors. Club was filled with students of all ages. Being multi-storey with a parking lot and near the uni., these factors were enough for making it a perfect party spot. After talking to a few fellow classmates, you went upstairs, brushing past chain’s group, who seemed to be too drunk to notice you. There were Jungkook and yugyeom with few others sports physiotherapy students. Being master’s students, you all just went to parties for alcohol and hook-ups and nothing else. And that’s what you were planning to do from the start.
“y/l/n” as yugyeom noticed you, he and Jungkook ran to give you a bear hug.
“I don’t want to smell your armpits, losers. Get away” you huffed while struggling in their tight grip.
“sowwyyyy, we forgot you are under average” jungkook teased you, gyeom giving him a hifi in return.
“You both are so damn irritating.”
“We adore you too, darling” Jungkook knew how much you hated being called that. But alcohol in his system was making him daring. After giving a fist hit to his gut, which did nothing to his sculptured abs, you made your way to the drinks. One, two, three, and within 5 minutes you had enough alcohol in your system to provide much needed numbness to your brain.
“Whoa shortie, what’s with you today? At least wait for us to join you.” kook chimed in with another nickname you hated with your guts.
“You both are already drunk, meaning kook your boyfriend is here and gyeom, your girlfriend. You both are going to forget me in few minutes anyway.”
As if on cue, yugyeom’s girl yeong came into view, giving you a proper hug.
“I’m so sorry y/n, but we have to go. Our department has to work for the fundraiser tomorrow and I’m a designated driver here.” she explained sheepishly. Not like you were dying to talk to them today. The loner, the better.
“Plz take them away. I’ll send you a thank you card tomorrow for your act of kindness.” you said sarcastically, resulting in both of them making faces at you.
“Bye y/n we’ll mwisss uuu” Jungkook lunged at you with a back breaking hug. Then came gyeom and in a minute they were both out of your sight.
Those being out of your way meant no one was there to stop you. Once your body was flooding in alcohol, You made your way to the dance floor. You loved music and dancing came mechanically with that. You were swaying your body, mingling with the music when you felt a pair of hands controlling your movements. You accepted his well-known touch. You both moved side to side for a few minutes before he impatiently lead you towards the back of the club. He was always an eager one, not that you ever denied him. Noticing few people already in each others faces, he moved to the other side, heading towards the car parking. Sprinting towards his car, he hurriedly opened the back car door to lead you in.
“Not here, wonwoo.” he viewed you with his raised brow. “Back!”
“Who am I to refuse you, baby” he said, directing you towards the trunk. He opened it with one swift motion. His legs were swinging outside as he sat on the edge. Pulling you towards him, he kissed you hungrily like hadn’t feasted on you a few days ago. Wonwoo loved your touch, and same was the case with you. That was it, nothing more to description.
“Looks like someone missed me” you whispered in between the kisses.
“You are at a perfect height for me here. God, why didn’t I think of this earlier” and kept attacking your lips until they were plump enough to satisfy him. His tongue asked for entrance, which your lips provided without any hesitation. Your hands were mingled in his hair tugging at the hair roots, earning few groans from him. Somewhere while kissing, you ended up on his right thigh which you were roughly grinding by now.
“As much as I would love you to cum on my thigh, I want to take you raw. So please be patient” he requested while stopping your movements with one hand. His other hand was caressing your back and waist, making you bite him on his lips.
“Shit, you can’t wait huh” he jested at you. he dropped you on your feet, one hand resting against your wet core from behind, other angling your neck to place wet kisses on your collarbones. You whimpered and squirmed against his touch. He had that effect on you. You weren’t sure what drew you both back towards each other after each week but the pull was compelling to you.
After gratified with his artwork he stood up to replace your positions. You were now sitting on edge while he towered over you. Hastily your hand went to remove his belt but seeing you struggling, he took up the task for himself. You removed your own shorts in meantime and placed them where his pants were now. Fortunately for others, the party inside was still lively to engage them and there was no fear of getting caught, not that wonwoo cared. He could take you anytime, anywhere.
He had to lower himself to hold you but he was so used to it by now. Without a warning, he slided you towards his standing body to kiss you ravenously. Your hands did their work on his boxers and started pumping his already hard length. No words were spoken as your silky underwear was removed from your hips. He backed you against the surface to the point you were lying down, his hand on back of your head to support you. His length slipped into you making you whimper loudly. He was big, from everywhere. Skin slapping was the only sound that could be heard in the quite parking lot at this hour of night. His hand on your hip was holding you tight, your legs wrapped around his waist while he fucked and kissed you in his brute mode. If it was not for his arms, you’d have collapsed then and there.
“Fuck y/n. how can you be so tight” he hissed against your lips.
“Shut u-up.” your voice got stuck in your throat. The only thing in your control were your hands on wonwoo��s nape, holding him towards you. The muscles in your abdomen, which could be felt by him, went stiff, your back arching at familiar sensation. His own kisses went sloppier indicating he was also closer. You both released at the same time, warm liquid spilling out of your conjoined bodies. He placed a sweet kiss on your forehead before removing himself from you.
Before you could touch your panties stuck between your legs, he stopped you.
“Wait lemme find something to clean you up” he quickly got dressed, while you sat there with your intertwined legs. He came back from front with a handkerchief. He cleaned you before helping you with your shorts. You were glad for wearing loose shorts as they were easy to transfer with your shoes. With his arm on upper side of trunk, his hunched figure stared you down suspiciously.
“What’s up with you today?”
Not him as well.
“Nothing, I overslept and I’m still tired. So I’ll be going now.” you declared implying that you won’t tell him.
“Okay, as you say. Are you free next Friday though” he asked taking his chances. Again.
“Don’t start again woo? At least you can leave me in peace. I’m going .bye bye. See you after finals. maybe.” you slipped away from under his arm towards the gate of parking lot, only looking behind to wave him goodbye. His followed suit.
You were gone but he’d never stopped trying.
You mentally thanked your friends for giving you an invite as many things were clear in your head now. It was definitely the alcohol and wonwoo but you were much calmer now.
A ping.
Jaemin: don’t forget about tomorrow, noona. Taeyong hyung told me to remind you.
You scoffed at his text. Noona. Some overhyped kid he was!
But his message made you understand that all this was permanent. Sober you or drunken,Your life was changing forever. The tomorrow you were waiting till now was altered.
You went home with same dejection. Taeyong’s last words echoing in your head.
“Life’s never fair y/n. realise it as soon as you can. It is the only secret for living a regretless life.”
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feedback is appreciated. it serves as motivation for writers! so please leave some honest feedback to help me improve! thanks for reading!!
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hyakki59 · 3 years
Text
Eren x Reader - Argument - Old times
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Warning; a bit of violance and a bit of smuty in the end
The world of this story takes place on the old times. No technology, no electricity, no big cities. Houses in the nature and people living in clans.
You are living with Jaegar Clan, because you and Eren are newly married. Everyday your heart beat faster for this man, you can't get enough of his smile, his light tanned skin, his green eyes and his long hair that falls on his shoulders. He is also a tease, always want to tease you, in a good way, and laugh.
You both immediately dreamed of your happy long life together when you decided to get married. You hadn't thought though those little arguments that may follow in the future. The day arrived when you and Eren had your very first argument.
"I told you to not distance yourself!!"
Eren shouts at you angrily. You are both standing outside the house. And Eren decided to give you a lecture while other people are also nearby.
"What? Am I not allowed to go for a walk?!"
You ask in disbelief touching with your fingers your chest
"Walk? Walk?!! I told you to not leave our side!!"
Eren shouts back pointing with his finger the ground
"Well, it's your very fault, you know, for dragging me along with you and your clan in your stupid fights with the nearby villages!!!
You shout at him too, moving your hand in the air. Eren didn't like that comment and he approaches you with a sudden pace. He grabs your upper limb
"Don't ever call them stupid again"
Eren says angrily yet with a low voice tighten his teeth. His eyes looking around quickly as if he wants to see if someone heard you.
"You gave us trouble with moving away from our spot, can't you understand that?"
Eren asks you, trying to keep his voice low.
"No Eren! What I can't understand is dragging me along with something I didn't want in the first place!!"
You shout with a complaint
"I'm your husband, and you must listen to whatever I'm saying! You embarrassed me!"
Eren adds with a way that he wants you to understand
"Really? Is that what am I supposed to do? Then fuck off my husband!!"
You shout at Eren and turn your back at him in order to walk away
"Come here!"
Eren says grabbing again your arm and adds;
"Don't talk to me like that. And sit here, we need to make clear that you understand your fault!"
"We don't have to say anything more Eren! I got this! You don't want me to do anything on my own! I'm just for warming your little cock! Nothing more!!"
As you are shouting you move wildly your arms like you wanted to hit Eren on his chest. Eren's eyes widen with the comment of yours and at the same time grabs your wrists because of your wild movements
"Oi! Shut it!!"
He eventually says
"No, I won't! You are a fucking bastard-"
"Shut it, you slut!!"
You both look each other with widen eyes. Some passing villagers looked at you from far. You hadn't argue like that with Eren before. You were both so lovely dovey all the time, that you didn't expect to reach at this point. Eren has now a shocked face, taking a few steps back. He hadn't talked to you like that before and wasn't expecting to.
"Y/N... I'm.."
He says, looking down at his feet. You on the other hand have tear up.
"When we didn't find you at first, you worried me sick.. I was afraid in the idea of losing you.."
Eren says approaching you quickly taking you in a hug
"I'm sorry for what I said"
Eren says his hand shoved in your hair
"I'm sorry too.."
You say hugging Eren too.
~°~°~°~
The previous intense scene ended and you thought that it won't have any more extent. The night have arrived, you and Eren are now at your shared bedroom.
It's an old style room, with wooden floor and walls made from stones. Fabrics like rug are decorating the walls and the furnitures' material are also from pure wood. The bed's design is with wooden railings which they are in every bed's leg.
You are sitting now on your bed, your back touching the hardboard and your legs inside the blankets. Eren approaches the bed, standing in the end of it and looking at you. You look at him giving a smile. He is having a thoughtful look though, like he's inspecting you.
"Come on"
You say at Eren with a smile while you do a 'pat pat' near you at the empty place of the bed.
"I think it's time for you to get your punishment for disobeying me"
Eren eventually says putting his hands on his belt. This serious face of him scared you a little.
"Eh? What do you mean?"
You ask Eren with a puzzled face and benting your knees.
"You need to learn what it is like disobeying your husband"
Eren says taking off his belt enfolding it inside his hand and holding it like it was his weapon. Your eyes open widely, and you jumb out of the blankets, having a standing position on the bed supporting your body on your knees.
"Eren, I said I'm sorry"
You say with an alarming look having your arms open in defence in case he approaches.
"Well, your apologize is accepted. But, anyone learns better their fault when they get punished physically."
Eren adds holding his belt firmly in readiness.
"You are not going to use that on me, right?"
You ask while your heart starts to beat faster
"Well, I need to"
"You are crazy"
You say trying to move on the side to escape
"No, Υ/Ν, stay still. We are gonna make it quick. It's not like I want you to get hurt"
Eren says doing a motion with his hand like he says 'stop'
" 'You don't want me to get hurt' in my ass. Don't you dare approach me with that thing!"
You say frowning trying to leave from the other side of the bed but Eren trying to stop you by coming towards you. You then try to leave from the other side. Eren is grabbing the wooden railings of the bed, to get momentum, trying to follow you. He's coming towards you in order to prevent you from leaving. His hair are moving because of his fast pace.
"Y/N, this is how we punish here. Me as a kid was punished too with that way when I was disobeying, and believe me, this work better when it comes learning your fault"
Eren tells you reassuringly doing a 'calm down' motion with his arms, like he wants to calm you.
"Fuck off!! I'm not gonna accept those kind of brutal ways of learning, you crazy people do here!!"
You shout at him, saying the word 'learning' loudly with an ironic way. Eren approaches you quickly climbing on the bed. When his knee touches the mattress you jump off quickly out of the bed. Eren stretches his arm to grab you, unsuccessfully though.
"Y/N! Stay still!"
Eren shouts his body falling on the bed.
"No!!!"
You shout running in the other edge of the room. Eren stands up from the bed and when he is about to move, still holding his belt, you start to throw things at him.
"Go away!!!"
You shout, grabbing things that are in the top of the furnitures. Cups, combs, small boxes, everything that was in your way. You are throwing all of them at Eren, in order to make him stop.
"Y/N! Ah!! Stop!!"
Eren says trying to avoid the things you throw at him, but some of them hit him.
Eren runs towards you and you run too in order to escape from him. You climb again at the bed and Eren catch up with you, wrapping his arms around your waist
"Ahh!!! Leave me alone!!"
You shout moving widely your hips so Eren could leave you. Indeed you manage to escape and as you try to leave from the bed you trip and fall on the floor. Eren grabs this opportunity and quickly stands above you. He tries to lift up your nightgown and you let out a cry. As you were moving your legs widely you kick with your foot Eren's jaw
"Ahhh!!!"
Eren groans loudly. He surely saw starts with that kick of yours.
"Y/N, just stay still, we will finish this as quickly as we will start this"
Eren says feeling pain in his jaw, trying to hold you still at the same time. Eventually, he succeeds in turning you, your back facing him and he hold you still in his lap. With one hand he holds you still by pressing your back down and with his other hand he lifts up your nightgown only for your butt to be exposed. You are moving widely trying to be free
"Eren!! No!!"
You shout but Eren hits your butt with his belt using his strength
"Ahh!! You will regret this!! Ahh!!!"
You are shouting while Eren hits you with his belt
"You are a crazy stupid asshole!!!"
You are constantly shouting being in the verge of crying. Eren though continues his punishment, the hit from his belt touching your butt was echoing.
~°~°~°~
The next morning arrived, and you aren't talking to Eren, you don't even eyeing him. He didn't only hurt you but he embarrassed you too. You wouldn't be surprised if anyone from the near houses could hear you the previous night. You are even embarrassed to eye a neighbor.
The following days, whenever Eren was approaching you to touch you, you were ignoring him and moving your shoulder away from his touch. Eren had a sad face everytime you were avoiding him. That wasn't the kind of image he had in his mind after your punishment. He thought that you would 'understand' his kind of thinking.
An example of your avoidance is this kind of night. You are wearing a white nightgown thin and light enough, so your body parts are visible. As Eren sees you in this cloth, he smiles awkwardly, liking what he sees, his chest going up and down from his enthusiasm. You eye him with a 'supposed' sly smile. Eren grabs with both of his hands the edge of his shirt in order to take it off, but at the same time you shove your self under the blankets, laying down. Eren's mouth stayed slightly open
"I thought we.."
"Then think again"
You cut Eren abruptly, getting yourself comfortable on your pillow in order to sleep.
Another night you and Eren are already sleeping. Outside the weather is bad, raining a lot. The sound of the lighting strikes woke you up. Eren is rubbing his eyes. He sees your back is turned at him as all the previous nights. He feels a pain in his chest, you two being like this. He approaches you slowly from behind, trying to wrap an arm around you carefully like you are about to break into pieces. You are awake too, because of the thunders. Eren's touch makes you to eye him quickly then look infront of you again.
"It's cold tonight, I thought that you would be cold..."
Eren says hugging you properly now. You didn't answer anything. As you didn't chase him away, Eren grabs the opportunity to make one move more. He kisses very lightly your shoulder, eyeing at the same time your face to see your expression. You stiffen your body as Eren kisses you. Eren noticed that and decides to not ruin the moment of hugging you, so he lays his head behind yours. The truth was that you had missed the feeling of Eren being that close to you, but you still haven't forgiven him from what he did to you. You both fell asleep like that.
~°~°~°~
Now, it's another day. You are sitting on a small stool infront of your mirror- furniture. You are combing your hair. At this time, Eren enters your shared bedroom, looking at you. You are not looking at him at all. Eren approaches you, kneeling beside you. He touches with his hands your thighs.
"You don't want me anymore?"
Eren says looking up at you with a sadden face. You turn looking down at his face. That was a positive thing for Eren.
"Y/N, I love you. I don't want to lose you. I will protect you with my life. Forget what happened. That's a different story, it belongs now to the past."
You are still looking at him voiceless
"Isn't that enough.."
He says lowering his head, his hands still on your thighs.
"Raise your head"
You say in a demanding voice. Eren suprised looks up at you
"I haven't forgiven you yet. But the sure thing that we can't be unspoken for ever"
Eren's straighten immediately his body letting out a happy sigh smiling at you. Your words gave him hope. His face approaches yours, he wants to kiss you, but first he is examining you. He approaches you slowly afraid to not ruin the moment. You had missed too his kisses, that's why you let his lips to touch yours. He kissed you soflty. As you took apart you kiss again each other, your kisses become from soft to more passionate. You suddenly want each other badly. You continue to kiss each other like maniacs, you holding Eren's head with both of your hands and Eren's hands traveling under your cloth up to your thighs.
You lean towards Eren, leaving your seat from the stool. Eren is lowering himself towards the floor because you are leaning towards him. As Eren's back touched the floor, you sit up on his lap and start leaning down, shoving your tongue on Eren's mouth, when you lips touched. Your tongues are fighting and you start to rock your hips, rubbing yourself on Eren's bulge. Eren is moaning through the kiss feeling full pleasure and you are also whimping wanting him so bad. It's been days since you and Eren had done something like that. You break the kiss start to undress each other. You are still both on the floor, naked now and can't resist anymore. You grab Eren's length and position it under your core. With one motion you lower yourself, Eren's now inside of you. Eren lets out a groan. You start to rock your hips, your pace gets faster every second. Eren's hands are on the sides of your butt, letting you do your work. You and Eren are a moaning mess. Your eyes catch a knife that lays down the floor beside you and you grab it. You press lightly it's peak at Eren's throat, still rocking your hips. Eren's eyes widen, him still moaning.
"Don't you ever dare to lay a hand on me again, or else I will open up your throat, you got it?
You say to him with a threatening way, still moving your hips. Eren is having a worryingly face, being afraid with that knife on his throat. He nods though, still moaning. You then throw the knife across the room and start to ride Eren even more widely.
Eventually, your reletionship with Eren got a little spicier and wildier than you had thought at first, but nevertheless you have your way to teach him a lesson.
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