#in my journal
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First week in my new leuchtturm1917 a6 📿 I even dared to make a small collage on the last pages (will probably fill more spreads like that in the future)
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#poetry#poems#prose#writeblr#writing#writblr#in my journal#orangesplorange#original writing#original poem#short poem
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#kinda wanna start writing poetry more… like just straight-outta-my-head stream of consciousness stuff#I don’t always love modern poetry and I have read behind too many people who are snobby about it#who act like not having a solid rhyme structure or syllabic scheme or whatever is inherently less poetic#and I DO wanna learn to write really good solid poetry (Tolkien-style poetry) someday#but right now that is a lot of time and energy that I do not have and I often find myself writing freestyle poetry-ish nonsense#in my journal#and many times it’s the easiest and most brain-to-paper way for me to write#Anyway. need to stop talking and get ready for work now.#the gist of all of this is—I wanna write but I don’t wanna write bad-quality stuff. even as I recognize that writing bad stuff is the only#way to ever begin writing good stuff.#so I think I may just have to suck it up and start writing the bad stuff now and just get it all out so I can get to the good stuff later#I have a sideblog I made a while back specifically for my writing and I really wanna start using it. maybe I’ll start writing poetry#and putting it there.#that’s really all I can muster the energy for atm but maybe that’s ok for now.#gurt says stuff#personal#mobile
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i need to reorganize/ transfer my tbr into a physical notebook…
#it’s getting silly. half of it is on goodreads half is photos or screenshots in my photos and some are in my notes app or random pages#in my journal#she speaks.l
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Okay but once you get into journaling there's no going back .
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Something in me wants more. I can't rest.
— Sylvia Plath, from “The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath.”
#The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath#sylvia plath#words#poetry#literature#quotes#out of my collection#lit#abyss of words#quote
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"came back wrong" you could not come back wrong even if you tried. you've changed, beyond recognition, but while my eyes may not know you, my heart still does. i love you.
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a little diary about trying to find a middle ground between being spiritual and being a schizophrenic
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Fish, pointillist birds, grapple, Sondheim, and frank O’Hara
#illustration#my art#soupandcats#mixed media#oil pastel art#oil pastel#daily planner#daily drawing#hobonich art#hobonichi planner#hobonichi#stephen sondheim#there won’t be trumpets#frank ohara#fish art#fishes#journal#art journal
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Cooking with Franz Kafka — Valerie Stevers, The Paris Review. Link.
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mentions of YOU from my journal <3 (ig: jayetart)
#lovecore#journal#art journal#mine#im in loveeeeee im in lov e#YES these are all abt my girl#jayetart#teenbeachmovie3
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friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me
#It’s just so different#even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol#in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps#if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it#esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends#no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr#u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS#meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life#this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation#like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !!#& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers#who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them#and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends#it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me#I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc#like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this#so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works#p
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There's no part of me that I wanna hate and I love how I've become someone who doesn't wanna hate, not me nor myself and not anyone else.
excerpt from my journal
#chaos journal#in my journal#journal#idk what to do#love language#positivethinking#oh yes yes yes#dark acadamia aesthetic#poets on tumblr#dead poets society#deadpoet stuff#my writing#writing prompt#dark academia#reader pov#kill your darlings#light academia#writers block#writers on tumblr#aesthetic
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mutual 1: got in a car accident today didnt have time to masturbate bc i had to exchange insurance info with the other guy but i think i have a chance of hooking up with him bc he drove a ford
mutual 2: call me throat cancer the way peter tork could get it
mutual 3: (500 reblogs of a robert de niro/martin scorsese yaoi photoshop edit)
mutual 4: i think love will always be there. even when you wish it werent. (gif of rotating monkeys)
mutual 5: breaking news stephen stills stopped taking estradiol because it made him experience menopause symptoms
mutual 6: who would be the first member of the beastie boys to get an abortion i vote ad rock
mutual 7: (web weaving post dedicated to descriptions of nonsexual intimacy in an air fryer instruction manual)
mutual 8: heres a link to my google drive containing every single article on jstor its continuously updated but please DM me if ive missed one.
mutual 9: (poll) my psychiatrist told me i might be the cause for my relationship issues with the elderly gay couple ive been practicing bdsm with should i kill the psychiatrist or myself?
mutual 10: giys im scared
mutual 11: trent reznor has never washed his pussy but id still eat it every day #feminist
mutual 12: went for a walk and got some coffee. the sun is shining, children are playing on the street and life is wonderful
mutual 13: drafting my suicide note while on hold with the bank rn
mutual 14: (photo of the most gorgeous plate of food imaginable) quick dinner tonight! didnt have time to sous vide the quail so i opted for a quick braise - still turned out delicious!
mutual 15: sooo.... apparently my city has been cursed with an eternal night for like 3 years and i didnt notice? kinda gerardcore if you u ask me..
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