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#in the last year or two i feel like ive finally gotten a chance to start processing Events in my life
famewolf · 1 year
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got back from the lake last night
it was a ton of fun and we spent most of it zooted out of our minds. but it also really hit me how much has changed in the last 8+ years. seeing a bunch of people that I hadnt seen since my teens or early 20s. it strangely put a lot of things into perspective for me, especially considering I feel like I lost time due to the pandemic.
all in all, a lot of relaxing and chatting and eating good food!
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wintervalewritersecond · 11 months
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tears to shed iv - simon 'ghost' riley
masterlist // masterlist call of duty
requested: no, but requests are OPEN! request: x
A/N: last part! hope this makes up for the sad ending last part <3
part 1 // part 2 // part 3 // part 4
wordcount: warnings: ooc simon (like, very ooc), corpse bride au, she/her reader, happy ending
An arranged marriage to unite two worlds. But no one would have expected that it would bring together the living and the dead.
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Your parents were much happier to hear that they were up in the social ladder now than that they were to hear that you had come back. Lord and Lady MacTavish also could not care less - as long as they got money, they would be set.
It is not like life with Johnny was bad. Not at all, actually. You had fun with him, and he was someone you feel comfortable with. He is so trustworthy, funny, and nice. It truly could have been so much worse.
The years pass, new people coming to the town, other people leaving. Babies are being born and elderly people are passing away. You aren't scared of death anymore - you have lived in it, you have loved in it.
Marriage to Johnny is like marrying a best friend. Both you and Johnny found out quite early on that you did love each other, yet more like friends or family instead of lovers. Not that you thought the other was ugly, mean, or uninteresting. It was just platonic, but to be quite honest, you did not mind.
You could be on the street, or worse, married to a horrible person. Lucky for you, you are 'stuck' with Johnny. Every single day felt refreshing, always going on trips or eating a delicious dinner. Your mother and father barely came to visit, saying they were much too busy with their new way of life. Lord and Lady MacTavish were also not seen very often, always far away, enjoying the money they now had.
Years seem to fly by.
The older you get, the faster time goes.
Your body is becoming weaker, the people around you have left, and the house feels much too big for only two people. It is winter now, and sickness is going around, a sickness that had also gotten the better of Johnny.
You sat by his side, his body covered with endless blankets, coughs coming from him ever so often.
"You are burning up," you mumble, your hand on his forehead.
He does not respond, only looking at the ceiling before finally turning his head to you. This is the most movement he has gone through this entire week. Johnny stays quiet for a moment, blinking slowly before licking his lips.
"Is the afterlife scary?"
"No," you softly say, taking hold of his hand, "It is fun, free, careless. You will have your own place, and you can have endless drinks at the bar. It is colourful and bright."
He hums, his hand softly squeezing yours as he looks past you.
"I think I would like to go there."
Your breath hitches in your throat, tears burning in your eyes as you look at him, bringing your other hand to his cheek.
"You do?"
Nothing but a hum yet again, his eyes looking past you.
"Y/N?"
"Yes?"
"Will you find me there?"
You nod, pressing a kiss to his hand.
"I will."
"Can you promise me something?"
Your heart feels heavy.
"Anything."
"After you find me... Also find Simon. That one man from years ago," he whispers, coughing, "If it... If it truly is as you said, then please, find him. Live the life you couldn't live now."
"Johnny," a tear falls down your cheek, "You are acting as if my life with you was not good."
"Oh, lass, we had a wonderful life. But the afterlife you describe... It is your second chance. Take it, please."
One last promise you make to him. Through sickness, through health, till death do you part.
"I promise you, Johnny. I love you so."
"And I love you."
After one last breath, one last blink, he leaves you. Leaves you behind as you did that one night, though you know he will not come back. More tears fall down your cheeks as you press a soft kiss to his forehead. Another friend lost.
You then spent months alone. No visitors, no Johnny, no parents.
It was weird.
The world seems so grey, so bleak, so colourless. There is nothing for you here. You eat just to eat, you read just to read. Everything seems meaningless. Another night where you go to sleep in a cold bed.
But this time, when you wake up, you feel different.
Your bones don't hurt, your limbs don't feel heavy, your hair doesn't feel brittle. Instead, you feel lively, weightless, free.
"A new arrival!"
Is the time finally here?
You open your eyes, the lights very bright, and you nearly can not believe what you see. It's the bar, the people, the music, the drinks.
"Wait..."
You quickly turn around, coming eye to eye with Johnny.
"Lass?"
You nod slowly, a smile forming on your face as you fling your arms around him.
"Oh, Johnny!" You pull away from him for a second, your hands on his cheeks, "I can't believe it! Oh, you look so young."
He does not nearly look the same as when you last saw him. His skin isn't wrinkly, his eyes are bright, and he has the same silly haircut.
"Says you," he grins, holding out his cup to you, "You look as mighty as ever."
You look at his cup and back at him. You are actually here. But, if you are... Is Simon here as well? Johnny still has a smile on his face, taking a swig from his beer. He knows what, or rather who, you are looking for.
"Go on," he nods his head to the exit, "We will have eternity to celebrate that you're here. Go, we can talk later."
You press a kiss to his cheek, nodding as you lift up the bottom of your skirt, walking up the stairs that lead to the outside of the bar. You are met with a mirror, right next to the door. You look so much younger, almost as if no time had passed. Dressed in a nightgown, your hair done up, looking youthful as ever. The age when you first got here, gone back in time, just like Johnny.
The roads, the coffins, the lights - all are exactly as you remember them being. You have dreamt of taking this exact walk dozens of times, clenching onto the dogtags that you had yet to take off. Now, you actually walk there, the tags tight in your hand. A left here, straight, and then...
You are so absorbed by your own thoughts that you do not register the person in front of you. You yelp, nearly falling over, but catching yourself by holding onto a crate.
"Oh, sorry! I wasn't looking where I was going!"
"Y/N?"
You look up, you know that voice...
"Price?"
"I can't believe it!" He laughs, pulling you to him to give you a big hug, "You are here! Oh my god, wait until Simon hears about this. You are going to give him a heart attack!"
"Where is he?"
"At home," he backs off, nodding his head into the direction of the house, "Hasn't been out too much. Kept his mask back on, been in a real mood for a while. You know, he never got over you."
He still thinks of you?
"Neither have I," you whisper, looking up at the man.
"Oh, I know," he only shrugs, "Johnny and I have become well acquainted over these months. Sadly haven't been able to really talk to Simon too much, but I think that might change."
The two of you continue your way, only a few doors away from the love of your afterlife. What if he doesn't want to see you? What if you are not like how he expected? Maybe he does not wish for a life with you.
"Don't worry your little head, Y/N," Price whispers, stopping at the door, "I will leave you be. Come by the bar later?"
You nod, sending him a smile as he leaves you alone at the door. What now? Do you knock? You feel nervous, yet you don't feel the pounding of your heart or the sweat in your hands. You are excited, though you can't feel the butterflies in your stomach.
A soft knock on the door.
Was it not hard enough? What if he isn't home? What if he didn't hear? What if he acts like he doesn't hear so he doesn't have to answer-
"Price, I told ya, I don't want to go to the-" the door gets ripped open, revealing the masked man you have thought about each and every day, "pub."
"We don't have to if you don't wish to, Simon."
"Wh... Is that you?"
He grips your cheeks tightly, scared that if he lets go, you will disappear. His eyes scan your face, the rest of his face hidden behind the skull mask he wore when you met him. You nod as much as you can, but the tight grip barely allows for you to move. Within a second, you are in his arms, his arms around you and his head on top of yours. Even if you wanted to, you could never get out of this embrace.
"I can't believe it. You are here."
"I am here," you confirm.
"I have waited each and every day. Price told me your husband came here before you did."
You nod.
"He did. But he made me promise him something."
What did he promise? Should Simon be scared? Are you only here to say hello, only to never see him again?
"He wants me to have a second chance. To life my... afterlife, the way it was intended. With you."
He slowly lets go, looking down at you with big eyes. His tags still around your neck and you looking like an angel. Is this real? Someone, pinch him, though it will not work.
"With me?"
"Johnny and I were friends. Best friends, even," you whisper, holding onto Simon his hands, "He told me to find you, Simon. And, if you will have me, I would want to spend this eternity with you."
That is all that he has ever wanted to hear.
So, he gets down on one knee.
"Death made us part, but now brought us together," he kisses your knuckles, "May I ask you to be my wife, for now until forever?"
One hell of a way to ask you to marry him.
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pineappleciders · 1 year
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i have been playing genshin since december of 2020.
i have waited two and a half years for ganyu. i have grinded. i have slaved myself away at my computer for hours. i had level 90 amos bow waiting for her. a full wanderers set. enough qinxins and whopperflower nectar to last twenty lifetimes. 6 million mora. 400+ heros wits. talent books. cryo shards. i have wanted her since release and never have i ever gotten 1. her on any of her banners 2. a chance to get her (as i stopped playing coincidentally before her last rerun)
i did it. i won the 50/50. i stayed awake for 8 hours too late just to watch the clock tick from nahida and nilous banners. i counted down the seconds. i hadn't wished in so long, i was shaking and so so nervous while wishing for her.
and shes here. shes back with her family. ive had zhongli, hu tao, and xiao waiting for her to join. she can finally be reuniitef with her father and siblings. one day i will get her girlfriend, keqing, so ganyu can live happily ever after.
i immediately maxed her out to level 90. i immediately crowned her primary attack. (i was gonna crown her other talents but i ran out of her talent books. i have everything else though) i completely ripped away ambers entire build for ganyu. i have waited so so so long. i was so prepared for ganyu, i immediately maxed her level to 90 while my mona who i got the day i started playing genshin impact is still at level 80(and NOT ascended) because i dont want to waste my fucking resin on oceanid. but now i have ganyu to torture those stupid fucking birds that always snipe me. razor can only do so fucking much with his 6 second cd skill that only has a chance to electrocute the birds. but ganyu has swept me off my feet and come to save the day. i love ganyu. i've been neglecting all of my characters to save up and grind for ganyu. i have like 6 characters at level 1 that i havent touched. i have been ignoring tighnari, only pulling him out for those stupid dendro monuments because it makes me feel cool to use a 5 star instead of collei.
i kid you not i cried when i got ganyu. i cried. i shed tears. wishing is so stressful seeing that yellow star and praying to all of the gods that you'll win your 50/50. and it happened. i have never been so satisfied with ny work.
and now because i can't find a purpose to keep going if i'm not grinding for some character on a video game, i am going to start my journey for the next raiden shogun banner. i don't care how badly i want scaramouche. i don't care how badly i want itto. i will dedicate my life to farming for ei because i find immense joy in organzing and grindinng and preparinf thi gs. anyways im super happy. thx if you read this all
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dari-ede · 1 year
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Sights on Each Other: Part III
Laughter and Tears in Life
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I - II - III - IV
Masterlist
Summary: Hoseok always wanted to live out his Fast and Furious fantasy—or at the very least get a taste of it on the track. He finally gets his chance. He learns how to properly drive on the racetrack with the help of a gifted individual. Too bad his instructor finds himself falling for the young idol. Follow J-Hope as he learns a new craft and helps a complete stranger discover something deep within himself. (NO smut. This story is about a friendship and one-sided attraction—narrator.)
Pairing: J-Hope x Male Reader (friendship only)
Rating: M (mature themes such as sexual awakening, depression)
Status: Complete
***************
2022
The place was packed. It had been my third year working here and I had never seen it so full. Sure, COVID had kept things small, but there was no denying that J-Hope’s presence at the festival was the cause of such a crowd.
Security was also very tight, so there was almost no opportunity for me to get close to him. Not that he was close enough for me to even call out to him. There were always a few dozen feet that separated us.
Before the start of the show, I had even gotten a glimpse of Maya and Jimin. I wasn’t active much on social media but I wasn’t clueless enough to have missed the news that these two had arrived for the event.
A part of me wondered if Maya would recognize me. However, she too was far away.
Feeling down that I hadn’t gotten the chance to at least catch their attention, I tried to focus on the event itself—and my job.
Some of the acts had done a good job, but most people were here for one guy—like I was.
And finally, the last artist before J-Hope finished. It was time to transition for his show. The moment was close.
However, as I made my way to my spot, I was held back by someone.
“Zee?” asked the person with their hand on my shoulder.
I turned to them and noticed it was a young, petite Asian woman with a slight accent. I had never noticed her before. But she had a lanyard around her neck like the majority of the staff and several wristbands. She must be one of the higher-ups because she wasn’t wearing the uniform. “Yes?” I asked.
She smiled. “Would you please come with me? It’ll only be a second.”
“Is everything alright?” I asked. We were told not to leave our posts.
“Yes. I’ve spoken to your supervisor already. I just need your assistance with something. It’ll be quick.”
I was confused but decided to follow.
I hoped it would be quick. I didn’t want to miss the show. Sure there was plenty of time left, but I didn’t want to risk it.
***********
2014
The next day I entered some old building in the city. I was quite surprised that I had arrived at the right place. Considering that J-Hope had said he was in some group, I would think his company would get him a decent place to work in. Surely, his label was able to afford a better place than some downtown sketchy area. It wasn’t a place that seemed safe after hours.
Suddenly, I found myself worried and hoping he wasn’t made to stay to practice in such a place well into the night. LA wasn’t as bad as the media made it out to be but one still had to be cautious in certain areas.
I sent Maya a text telling her I was outside. She must have been on a break because she immediately answered.
She was one of J-Hope’s and his group’s dance instructors during their stay; that’s how they had met. It was odd that Maya had taken a side job of the sort seeing that her stardom was really taking off. She had her career now she could focus on. However, she had mentioned she had taken on the instructor position as a favor for someone. Plus, it was a good business plan for her own girl group. J-Hope’s group was filming their practices and show, so Maya would be getting exposure overseas for her group. It was smart, honestly.
Just as I entered the building and made my way into the hall, I was greeted by Maya jogging my way.
“You can get lost here easily,” she said as she got to me. “Plus, there’s a guy in the staff who’s kind of an ass. I can see him giving you trouble and attitude if you get to us alone.”
I gave a slight nod, understanding. “You guys on break?”
“Yeah. Just for a bit. Gonna practice for another two hours and then we’re gonna catch lunch. Hopefully. If Mr. Asshole lets them.”
“Mr. Asshole?” I asked, confused.
She rolled her eyes. “The staff is overall really kind. But there’s one or two of them that are extremely strict. I’d like to tell you the details but we’re about to arrive,” she said as she slowed her walk as we got to a turn.
I looked up and took the turn with her. Upon turning, there were two Asian men sitting outside a door, looking at us skeptically.
Maya muttered something to them.
One of the men nodded but the other kept his eyes on me. I swear if looks could kill….
Pretending as if nothing was wrong, Maya made her way past them and opened the door. She held it for me and waited for me to enter first. As I took a few steps in, we exchanged a look. I guess I had just met Mr. Asshole.
Once inside the room, I could see people scattered in little groups throughout the room. There were cameramen, young girls chatting in the corner, some guys in the middle of the room dancing, and others off in a corner goofing off.
My eyes seem to immediately scout and spot J-Hope. He was among the group off in the corner. Without even thinking, my voice just took over. “J-Hoooooope!”
J-Hope’s neck snapped towards me, his eyes wide with concern. The frightened look on his face didn’t last. Upon seeing it was me, that bright smile took over.
Letting out a booming laugh, he made his way over to me. “Zee!”
After giving dap and slapping each other on the back, I noticed Jimin and Suga had come over as well. Greeting the pair of them in a similar fashion, J-Hope called over the rest of his group mates.
I met the broad-shoulder guy with too much eye-liner, Jin, the leader of the group—whatever that meant—who was tall and a little lanky, Rapmon, the little kid with the deep voice, V, and the youngest of them, Jungkook. They all were all smiles and seemed excited and eager when the end of their break was called. Hell, if it was me, I would have looked crabby.
As the guys continued with practice, I sat against the wall and watched.
I was surprised by how good they were. Not all of them seemed like natural dancers but there was no denying they all equally cared to perfect the job.
But in spite of their working hard, they also seemed to be playful. At one point, the kid with the deep voice—V—made a mistake and stepped on Jimin. The pair of them started to “fight” about it. The rest of the guys paid their bickering no mind but the youngest of them kept laughing at their banter.
I quickly took notice how Jimin kept physically close to some of the other guys. It wasn’t just J-Hope that he seemed touchy with. Also, I took note how some of the other guys acted in a similar fashion to Jimin—there was close contact and back hugs. Maybe it was the culture.
Maybe J-Hope and Jimin weren’t romantically involved.
My heart made a flutter at this thought.
Doing my best to stay focused on the guys’ dancing, I tried to squash these emotions down.
For the next couple of hours, I watched practice without getting the slightest bit bored. J-Hope sent me a lot of smiles and laughs. We exchanged a few words but mostly, I let him work.
Maya had stated practice was soon going to be over; however, a guy walked into the room and the whole mood seemed to change. It was Mr. Asshole.
The guys grew quiet. There was no more laughter.
Maya’s facial features altered as well. She suddenly had a resting bitch face.
“Ok, guys. One last time and then we can call it a day,” she said pretty loudly. Then said some words in Korean.
The cameras followed her as she got into position in front of the guys. The crew looked excited that the day was finally going to be over.
Mr. Asshole said something out loud.
I didn’t understand but judging by everyone's faces and groans, I reasoned whatever he said wasn’t good.
Maya placed her hands on her hips and responded back in Korean.
The man ignored her and we left the room.
She looked ready to punch someone.
J-Hope reached over to her and muttered something. “It’s ok,” I heard him say gently.
Taking a deep breath, she gave a nod. Turning to me, she gave a short description of what had just occurred. Their manager, Mr. Asshole, was wanting the guys to continue practicing.
For the next hour, the guys continued their work.
I started noticing a change with them, though. Their energy was clearly dropping. And some of the guys didn’t look too hot.
Maya called for a small break, holding V and leading him over to where the water was.
J-Hope walked over to where I was. I handed him a bottle of water. “You ok, man?”
He nodded and gladly took the water. He was out of breath but looked ok.
The same couldn’t be said about the rest of the guys, though. Even the staff looked to be a bit overworked. Although all they were doing was waiting, I had to remember that I had been here for well over three hours and none of them had eaten much. It was pushing past five already.
A bit later, Maya seemed to make a call. She spoke to one of the other staff present and they agreed the guys had gotten enough practice.
“Let’s go,” Maya told the guys. “Time to eat.”
V looked more than happy.
Some of the guys exchanged a look of worry, almost as if they wanted to get the ok from someone else.
One of the staff stepped in and said something to them, a smile on her face. She seemed more pleasant than Mr. Asshole.
“What’s happening?” I asked Maya as the staff spoke to Rapmon and J-Hope.
“Nothing. They practiced enough. Mr. Asshole stepped outside a while ago and we’re not sure when he’s gonna be back. One of the staff tried reaching him but he’s not answering. I think it’s good that we stop. They’ve practiced enough but they don’t seem to go unless Mr. Asshole says it’s ok.” Maya didn’t seem at all happy saying this. “Hopefully, this staff member is able to convince them to leave.”
A few minutes later, the guys finally gave in but didn’t seem happy about it.
I took the lead to show them where I was parked. J-Hope was right next to me.
We made our way over to my car and I took out my keys. “Wanna drive?” I asked a smiling J-Hope.
However, before he could answer a yell from behind us made us stop and turn around.
Mr. Asshole was making his way toward us.
Suddenly, I saw seven tall males turn into little children. All of their necks bowed down as Mr. Asshole seemed to scold them.
Maya stepped in between, though, keeping him from getting close to the guys. She said something quick in Korean—almost with a matter-of-fact tone. Then she turned away from him and pushed the guys towards our cars.
“We’ll bring them back by 11,” Maya said as she made eye contact with me, shoving Jungkook in front of her.
I was quick to notice how she kept her hands on the young one’s shoulders, keeping him from turning around towards the manager. A look of slight worry washed over Jungkook’s face.
A little confused as to what was happening, I opened my mouth to say something but then the guy yelled out something in Korean.
I wasn’t fluent in the language, but the tone made it clear he was unhappy and looked absolutely pissed at Maya.
Before I could even think to react, Maya turned to the fool. Her face also didn’t look so thrilled and while she kept her voice at an even volume, the tone she carried was stern and icy. She wasn’t to be messed with.
I couldn’t understand a word she was saying but by the looks coming out of the guys, she was saying something pretty ballsy.
Not waiting for a response, she turned back around and muttered something to Jungkook. She pushed him forward again.
Jungkook followed instructions and allowed her to maneuver him to the car. At his side, V was being handled as well. Maya managed to take hold of his shirt and drag him along.
I made my way over to my car, catching J-Hope’s eyes, which were wide with shock by what had occurred.
“Zee, you drive this time. I got V, Jungkook, Jimin, and Suga. Take J-Hope, Rapmon, and Jin.” Maya had a look and demeanor about her that I could not describe better than a mama bear.
I wasn’t about to be stupid enough to question her, so I made my way over to the driver’s side, telling J-Hope, Rapmon, and Jin to get into the car with me.
We wasted no time. Maya didn’t even wait for the guys in her car to buckle up. The moment all the doors were closed in her car, she drove off. I followed suit.
After checking the rearview mirror to ensure we weren’t being followed, I finally spoke up. “What happened back there?” I asked, turning slightly to J-Hope.
Stuttering for a moment as he tried to explain to me, J-Hope finally turned back to Rapmon. The two exchanged some words in Korean before Rapmon finally spoke up.
“Our manager wanted us to continue practice. Maya was just reminding him that we hadn’t eaten since morning. She was telling him we had to eat,” said Rapmon.
I filled everything in my head as I thought back to the day. Maya had mentioned that practice was supposed to only be another 2 hours when I arrived. However, the guys were pushing close to 4. Suddenly, I remembered how faint V looked and how off-color Jungkook appeared as well. Her mama-bear attitude made sense.
“She’s looking after you guys,” I said out loud. “She’s right—you need to eat.”
They didn’t agree with me, but they also visibly didn’t disagree. They stayed quiet.
A thought came to my head. “Will you guys get in trouble?” I asked, feeling concerned.
Rapmon spoke up. “No. He will probably forget. He was only in town today. He’s not coming back until the day of the concert. He might have forgotten by then. But Sejin will be there. He keeps things calm.”
There was an uncomfortable silence in the car for a good while. There were so many questions lingering in my head—concerns I had about their well-being. However, I kept my questions to myself. I didn’t know the guys well enough to ask such personal questions. I wasn’t like Maya who seemed to have immediately inserted herself in the guys’ business—in a good way. But that was Maya. She was a spitfire and not one to shy away from anything.
It wasn’t surprising that over the years she had stayed close to the guys. There was a famous clip on the internet of her calling some DJs who were saying grotesque words about the guys. It was right around the time when they started to get popular in the States. Many people in the media had been disrespectful towards the group. In the beginning, Maya seemed to never miss an opportunity to publicly snap back at anyone who mistreated the guys. She had swept the floor with the DJs and had brought down their popularity after she exposed them.
I wish I could have seen the future during that awkward drive with J-Hope, Rapmon, and Jin. I was concerned about their well-being: afraid their manager would make their life hell later. But I shouldn’t have worried. Later on, through fan forums, I learned this manager had been fired.
A while later, we arrived at the beach. I had followed Maya, not knowing where we would be going. However, after getting to the parking lot, I knew exactly where we would be eating.
“My treat,” Maya said as she headed to the small restaurant.
We all followed and ordered together.
Taking the largest table, I was grateful that the place was mostly empty. Fitting 9 people would have taken too long.
My eyes glazed over to the ocean view. While I lived in close proximity to the beach, I hardly ever visited. I turned to J-Hope who was sitting next to me. “How’s the water in Korea?”
He didn’t understand.
“Temperature. Water. Cold? Hot?” I asked as I motioned to the beach. “Beach?”
His face became clear. “Oh. Cold.”
“Have you been to the beach here yet?” Once again, he looked confused. I really needed to only use simple words. I tried again. “You touch this beach?”
“Yes! Touch before,” he answered.
“We went to the beach a few days ago,” Maya explained. “They say the water is a lot warmer here than there.”
“You like?” I asked J-Hope, holding a thumbs up.
He nodded happily and gave me a thumbs-up.
“Wanna go?” I asked J-Hope, motioning to the beach.
“Yeah!” A bright smile came across his face. He turned to his members and spoke to them in Korean.
They all shook their heads and gave their excuses.
 Maya laughed at something V said. She must have noticed my face. “He’s afraid if he goes, some of the guys will eat his food.”
“One will eat,” Jin muttered as he eyed Rapmon.
Rapmon looked a bit embarrassed and ducked his head.
Suga pointed to the leader and said something in between laughter.
“Jinjja?!” Maya exclaimed. It was one of the few phrases I had picked up on.
Rapmon didn’t say a word but gave a small smile.
Maya met my gaze. “Apparently there’s a story about Rapmon eating people’s food. I’ll get the whole story and tell you later.”
Giving a nod, I turned towards the beach and motioned J-Hope. “Come on. Let’s enjoy the view.”
J-Hope understood and followed.
We reached a spot on the beach with no people around. Again, the weekday kept the crowd at a minimum.
For several minutes we communicated using simple words. It was fun and entertaining. But eventually, we got to a topic I wasn’t too happy to have.
“Scar? How?” J-Hope asked, motioning to my cheek.
Not many people asked about it; I imagined it was because they were afraid of my answer. I had always been aware of how intimidating I could come across, especially with the brutal scar on my face. Secretly, I preferred when people didn’t ask.
“I was a kid,” I muttered, looking away from him, hoping that was enough.
“Oh. Kid? Young?”
I nodded.
“Age?”
A sense of boiling began to linger in my skin, my stomach producing knots. “8.”
“How?”
I shook my head and looked away, not wanting him to see or sense my anger.
My past was something I never liked talking about. Other than the people that were present when my scar took place, not a single soul knew the origins of my mutilation. And I believed at the time that it would always be that way.
The pair of us didn’t say a word for a good while. We stayed sitting in silence for a good moment. For the first time, I was hoping one of our friends would come over and interrupt us.
I looked out towards our friends, all still too far away. I was getting ready to just get up and suggest we head to them instead of waiting.
But that’s when J-Hope finally decided to cut the silence. And he didn’t speak English. He was talking in Korean.
At first, I thought he hadn’t noticed what he was doing, but when I caught the look on his face, I suddenly understood what was happening.
While I had known J-Hope for less than 48 hours, his face usually radiated with happiness. He never went too long without showing off his pearly whites. This time, though, there was a frown on his face as he spoke passionately in his native tongue.
I recalled earlier in the day—his practice with his members. How exhausted he had looked. Maya mentioned how they had a very tight schedule with little to no free time. Their manager, Mr. Asshole, making demands of them. All the while, J-Hope had kept his cool. As I understood it, he was one of the older ones and a leader—it made sense why he was putting up a front that everything was ok. However, deep down I wondered if everything was ok.
As he passionately spoke with a frown on his face, I was certain that he was venting. I might not know Korean, but he needed to let it out. What better person to let out his frustrations than a person who wouldn’t know what he was saying?
For a few minutes, he spoke without taking too many breaths. Maybe for the umpteenth time, I wished I knew Korean and vowed to learn it as soon as possible. Finally, when it looked like he was satisfied, he took a breath. It took a long moment for the frown to leave his face.
Then, he turned to me pointed to my scar, and said, “You turn.”
I felt like I was going to break down at that moment. In the next several years, I often wondered if J-Hope had decided to vent first so I was able to do so. Was there something written on my face that day that he immediately picked up on? Was there something that told him I was going through a rough time and somehow it tied to my scar?
I’ve never truly known J-Hope’s need to have opened up to me that night but I was grateful. For the next few minutes, I explained how I got my scar. It felt liberating, honestly. Like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I caught myself about to cry a few times but I managed to hold it in.
Feeling I couldn’t continue speaking on the subject, I stopped. I knew if I went on, I would have had a meltdown. And this was not the place to do it. My friends would notice and ask. And I didn’t want them to ask. I was only telling J-Hope because he couldn’t understand me.
A long moment later, J-Hope placed a hand on my shoulder and smiled sweetly.
The urge to lean over and know how those lips tasted ran through my body.
Did he feel the same?
Before my dumbass could do anything idiotic, I heard my phone buzz. Snapping myself out of it, I reached for it and noticed Maya’s number.
“What’s up?”
“Food’s ready. Hurry. We’re starving,” Maya said from the other end.
I hung up and relayed the message to J-Hope.
He quickly got up and we headed back to the restaurant.
The nine of us enjoyed the meal together. While we ate, I noticed how some of the guys were extra playful and communicative with Maya. V was especially chatty with her, a light in his eyes as he looked at her and didn’t seem to stop smiling at her.
It didn’t seem like a crush but looked more like a wandering gaze a small sibling gave an older sibling they admired. Maya used to have a similar look in her eyes when she stared at her brothers when she was younger.
Once our bellies were full, we made our way to our vehicles again.
“Tracks?” J-Hope asked with a big smile, getting into the passenger seat.
I laughed and turned to Maya.
She nodded.
“Oh, yes,” J-Hope said excitedly.
It didn’t take long to arrive and we didn’t have much time to spend there. However, J-Hope made the best of it.
The moment we arrived, he didn’t hesitate to get behind my wheel and do numerous laps around the tracks. We all applauded his technique. He was quite good.
I kept cheering the loudest, clapping and calling out his name. Suga found it especially entertaining in the way I called out J-Hope’s name.
“J-Hoooooooooope,” he mimicked me, putting his first in the air.
Everyone burst out in laughter, most especially me.
************
I - II - III - IV
Masterlist
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noloveforned · 6 months
Text
a little thought exercise for you this afternoon. imagine waking up on thanksgiving morning and realizing you still need to go to the grocery store before you can cook dinner. that's kinda how it feels when bandcamp fridays coincide with my radio show. i've finally gotten a bit better at the balancing act so we've got all the trimmings for tonight's show on wlur from 8pm to midnight. all you need to bring is yourself (and maybe a drink if you'd like one!)
there are also plenty of leftovers for you- last week's show is up on mixcloud (also seen below).
no love for ned on wlur – march 29th, 2024 from 8-10pm
artist // track // album // label the spinanes // hawaiian baby // rummy 7" // imp chastity belt // hollow // live laugh love // suicide squeeze non la // every lie // like before // mint the mystic tide // why // frustration // numero group rick white // these days // twenty golden hits of the eighties // (self-released) antenna // antenna state // antenna cassette // urge dancer // rein it in // ten songs i hate about you // meritorio essential logic // shabby abbott // john peel session on february 21st, 1979 10" // precious bzdet // starania // maybe it is enough? cassette // tetryon tapes the intelligence // always be kidding // now, squirm! // vapid moonlighting inc. sub verse // chance romance // scaling triangles compilation // zaius tapes anohni // it’s my fault // my back was a bridge for you to cross // secretly canadian beyoncé // ameriican requiem // cowboy carter // parkwood entertainment al harper // some day i'll be a farmer // the analemma observation league // take a turn etta james // my mother-in-law // tell mama // cadet cat power // tell me, momma // cat power sings dylan: the 1966 royal albert hall concert // domino cassie kinoshi's seed. // gratitude, part iv // gratitude // international anthem alice coltrane // shiva-loka // the carnegie hall concert // verve mike and tony seltzer // skurrr // pinball // 10k lilblackkids featuring sainvil and jassxnc // tcl // planet of the blues: part two // epistrophik peach sound e. live // city girl // cloud vibes // star creature maxo featuring zelooperz // playdis! // debbie's son // smileforme liv.e // bma // demos part 1, august and september 2023- sometimes they can't stay (ideas you love) ep // (self-released) the high llamas featuring bonnie "prince" billy // how the best was won // hey panda // drag city ruth garbus, sam gendel and philippe melanson // nature's piano // earth flower // fresh bread vagabon // autobahn // sorry i haven't called // nonesuch nights templar // o dhalgren // year two // reapo present electric // winged victory // present electric cassette // paisley shirt touch girl apple blossom // sidewalk // ep - ep // summer shade poundsign // coffee flavored friend // house of faith demo tape 1993 ep // speakeasy studios sf
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areallybadwriter · 11 months
Text
9/24
found the will to provide an update. got inspired whilst reading through my past posts and decided it would do me some good. and jesus christ, the last couple of posts have a lot of run-ons. i need some more practice obviously.
the city is doing me quite well at the moment. i had a brief stint of absolute disdain for my everyday life when i was unemployed and still adjusting to one of the biggest life changes a human being can experience. there was this period of feeling terrible about my self (physicality-wise) which im presuming is because its a new territory full of new people - a lot more people at that. a lot more people that i shouldn't value their passerby opinions but i do anyways. im getting over it now and am starting to like myself again but boy did i slip for a minute. ive been exploring new places, whether it be food or entertainment, which has provided me a sense of understanding of this place i live in. my friend and i were actually discussing how the city still felt a little weird to reside in, still enough foreignness to give off warning signs at times. we decided we hadn't sat at enough coffeeshops by ourselves yet, or we hadn't gotten enough groceries. i try to remember what moving from my hometown to my college town felt like but i don't recall the same amount of difficulty to adjust. i think in time i will feel better about it, maybe when the weather or just the general business of this place has chewed me up and spit me out a bit. i do hope that the winter is kind.
i had this past weekend off of work so i decided to take the train to this cute lakeside town where my very best friend (who ive known since i was 15) who now lives thousands of miles away was visiting her family's cottage. the train was gorgeous and ive never felt such excitement at the chance of listening to my music, sketching a little, and sitting in my own two seater on a train taking me to the beach. i thought of it as something so valuable i think i would only take someone who i truly love on there. to show them. they kicked us off halfway through to exit the train and board a bus to resume the rest of the trip because there was construction on the tracks. that part wasn't as fun, but i quickly arrived at my destination and had a wonderful less-than-24-hours with my best friend. the cottage her family owns has been in the family for many, many years and they've kept it pretty much the same. its an untouched but well-lived part of history and i basically foam at the mouth with adoration every time im there. its all lace and florals and carved wooden floors. we had a bonfire on the beach the night i arrived and all shared barbecue chicken pizza from this place down the road. her and i split a bottle of chianti and got a little tipsy, while her family talked and laughed amongst themselves. being away from home and familiarity for awhile, it felt really good to stretch out on the beach with all of them. it really filled the void of loneliness and missing my family. we took the train back into the city the next day after we drank coffee and ate breakfast casserole on the beach as the sailboats went by. it was a gorgeous little break and im glad i got to see her at the beginning and end of her trip. we plan on me visiting her next or both of us meeting somewhere in the middle.
one of my other best friends from high school (who is in the same friend group as the girl mentioned above) had a psychotic episode this past week and is most likely in an inpatient mental facility currently. she was my roommate up until i moved to the city and she is still living in our college town, now with her little sister and another bestie from that friend group. while we lived together throughout the years, she definitely had episodes and mentally ill tendencies (honestly, we all did) and it had gotten worse in the recent years. she had finally found some good therapy and some good meds that seemed to be doing wonders for her but i believe she went off of them, thus entering another episode. she was texting complete nonsense to a few of us in an aged group chat and from what i heard, didn't recognize her own sister and ended up calling the cops on herself. i hate being far away and not being able to help more and not being more informed on the situation. i just hope that she gets the inpatient help that she's needed for quite a long time and can get to the bottom of some of these issues. i think its interesting how many of us in the friend group have had psychotic episodes. i don't think i have personally experienced an episode exactly like that but there's something to be said about people forming friend groups around shared feelings and similar mental states.
wyoming is coming to visit me in a couple weeks. we are going to a late-night concert and then hopefully hanging out for awhile the next day. he has not been to my place in the city yet, which i think he will enjoy. the last time we were in the city together it ushered in a new era of how we interacted with each other (in a very positive light imo) so i hope this trip will provide us the same. there's something to be said about neither of us knowing many places or people up here. it lacks years of memories like our hometown so we are rid of burdens and guilt we may have experienced otherwise. maybe our purest forms. ive had a couple revelations about him recently as i haven't seen him in person in awhile and can think more clearly without constant thoughts of how our last time seeing each other was or something. the latest one was that i think i like him a lot more than he likes me. it absolutely stewed the last few days and it was hard to even talk to him over the phone because i kept reminding myself of the heartbreak. we had a conversation weeks ago about being able to love things or people and how both of us were scared that we had never actually done that. talked about how maybe every relationship up until this point had felt faked at times. we both related on these things, but he never clarified whether these feelings applied to our relationship as well. for me, unsurprisingly, it has been the most genuine connection ive ever had and there's never been a need or feeling to fake anything. and i know for a fact i love him. can just tell, and honestly ive felt it from sixteen and on. its something that freaked me out years ago but so much time has wilted the panic of it all. what scares me now is the investment of care ive put into it all, and with that comes certain moments of absolute uncertainty on whether he feels the same at all (especially if we've recently had a conversation about being able to love other people or he's in one of his distant periods). i think seeing him in person and spending that amount of alone time with him will mend some things and hopefully give me insight on how to proceed with the relationship. although at the end of the day, i know he will always be around somehow.
saved this is drafts and forgot what i was going to say next so to post it goes.
xoxo anonymous
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ventiskies · 4 years
Text
when he accidentally injures you | Xiao, Albedo, Bennett
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a/n: hello anon!! im doing well, thank you!! hope you are too !! thank you for giving me the chance to add characters HHHH ive been DYING to write for Xiao, Albedo and Benny so i took the opportunity to! hope you like it !! also,,, this is probably my longest post !! i loved writing this <3
pairing: Xiao x gn! reader, Albedo x gn! reader Bennett x gn! reader
warnings: vague mentions of injury and blood
Xiao
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★Xiao and you had been on a stroll, something you casually did together whenever Xiao was in a good mood. the adeptus wasn’t one to get out of the confines of Wangshuu Inn, so every time he does, you cherish it and spend it as if it was your last
★but this particular stroll didn’t go as planned, at all
★the two of you had left Wangshuu Inn in the morning, when the weather had seemed as if it would be sunny the whole morning, but it had betrayed you the moment you had set foot in Minlin, the skies had loomed with darkness and occasional rumbles of thunder
★Xiao could have easily teleported the two of you together, but a sudden attack with a ruin hunter had caused him to get distracted
★he could easily defeat the creation with a simple use of his elemental burst, but you were in the vicinity and he didn’t want you getting injured, despite the chances of hitting you were low, he wasn’t going to take the chance
★he had strictly told you to stay back and out of sight, making use of the terrain to jump and strike at the core with his polearm whenever the hunter was aiming to him, but he should have known you were stubborn
★the moment you had ran into the fight, arrow pointing to the ruin hunter, the said war machine had immediately turned towards you, all four of its arms aiming missiles towards you
★Xiao had been too slow, and when he had realized it was aiming towards you, you had already been sent back flying after the hit
★your name fell on his lips, his eyes widening in anger when he had seen what the creature had done, and without any hesitance Xiao summons his elemental burst and sends the creature falling to pieces
★“y/n,” Xiao mutters, worried that he would be met with the sight of you dead, “y/n, where are you?”
★you gave a weak groan, unable to raise your head after hitting it on the sharp rocks. Xiao made his way towards you, and the rain started pouting
★Xiao knelt down and cradled your head gently, seeing the gash on your head. you were most likely suffering from a concussion as well from the way you were unable to look at him in the eye, and your hands grabbing your forehead as if it had exploded
★his eyes showing evident worry, and this was the first time he had felt so scared
★he knew he was powerful, and he was beginning to regret even taking you out of the safety of the Inn. this shouldn't have happened, he was with you because he wanted to protect you,
★and here he was being the cause of your injury
★“y/n, can you hear me?” he asked, and when you hissed the moment he placed a gentle hand on your head, he curses lightly, unable to keep himself calm as he always had anymore, “hold on,”
★Xiao had lived for years and had suffered watching deaths and injuries of the people he had been close with since he had became the adeptus of Liyue, but for once, he had felt a different type of hurt when you had been injured this time
★because this was his fault; what if it had happened again?
★he had teleported the two of you back to Wangshuu Inn, and had asked Verr Goldet to help you just because he was afraid of hurting you further
★and she knew more than to question what happened, especially after Xiao had told her with the weakest voice she has ever heard him use, and pleading eyes to take care of you.
★when you had healed completely, you noticed Xiao had distanced himself from you more than when you had both met the first time, and it had worried you to no end
★it had came to a point where he would disappear whenever you tried to search for him at the balcony, and you were getting upset that he was running away from you because of the accident that was caused by your stubbornness; and the fact that you knew Xiao blamed himself had only made you more guilty
★”Xiao,” you gently said, walking outside with a bowl of his favorite almond tofu, “I miss you,”
★he had to contain himself to avoid disappearing on you again after he heard the words. Xiao wasn’t much of an emotional person, but the memories from the accident had left him afraid of getting close to you again, in fear that he would hurt you once more
★but when he had met your glossy eyes and saw the pained expression you held, he knew that it was only going to be worse is he had avoided you
★”y/n-” Xiao started, but you had only dropped the almond tofu and ran into his arms, hugging him tight as if you were afraid to let him go
★and (with reluctance), Xiao had hugged you back, twice as hard
★it would take time for him to get back to his usual self and trust himself to go out and adventure with you again, but for him, you would wait your lifetime.
Albedo
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★An experiment going wrong was a part of alchemy. It was something Albedo would expect to happen fifty percent of the time he conducts something for the first time
★He has gotten a handful of injuries from it that he had sometimes forgotten that people outside of the realm of alchemy wouldn't know what it would be like to expect a burn or scars after the first test
★So of course, sometimes even the smartest people could be careless
★Albedo had brought you to his lab in Dragonspine, claiming that he had found a rare plant and wanted to see if it was able to withstand heat
★Putting it in a flask, he had placed it on a test tube holder and your curious eyes had caught sight of the glowing pink tube
★“What’s this?” you stepped closer to inspect the glowing flask, and Albedo wordlessly looks at you with a fond smile. your curious gaze at his work had always made him feel happy; you truly were endearing
★Albedo turns on the burner, and the moment the fire had hit the flask, the substance had instantly exploded, causing you to recoil back and grab at your face when the substance had burned your face
★instantly, Albedo had abandoned his failed test and attended to you, trying to pry your hands away from your face
★“My love, I’m so sorry,” he says gently, trying to see the damage that the explosion has gave you, “please look at me,”
★you felt tears well in your eyes, the burns on your cheeks combining with the coldness of the snow stinging your face
★when Albedo had successfully pried your hands away , he grabbed them gently and looked at you, “we- we need to see the deaconess,” he mutters to himself, feeling his heart ache seeing you holding back tears, never in his life had he regretted conducting an experiment so badly;
★he had wished he was able to take the pain away from you, he absolutely despised seeing you so hurt
★after you had healed, Albedo would make a rule that you weren’t ever allowed in the premises of his laboratory ever again, and that you were banned from joining him whenever he was conducting experiments
★it had hurt you when Albedo had adamantly decided on it, but you knew that it would only hurt him more if you tried to fight him about it
★he was still blaming himself for the incident; despite him knowing that errors were completely common in alchemy
★his greatest fear was hurting you, and if he was given a choice, he would rather have you far away as possible from anything that could lead to potential harm
★(and that especially meant that when the time comes and he loses control and destroys Mond, he hopes you would be far away from him as possible, too)
Bennett
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★Bennett knew he was bad luck, he knew that was mostly the reason there wasn't anyone on his team. no one wanted to get hurt and gain nothing on an adventure. no one wanted to bring a bunch of medical supplies for when an accident that was bound to happen, happens
★no one but you
★you were the only member in Bennett’s team; you were a duo. you didn’t wield a vision, but that didn't make Bennett think of you any less, in fact, he thought you were the bravest person ever for being just a feet away from him outside of Mond, and now you were a team member of his
★injuries were common for you. there would always be some sort of scratch or bleeding whenever you went out on an adventure with the pyro vision holder. if there wasn’t a monster encounter, the two of you would accidentally trip and fall into a lake
★but when the latter happens, Bennett would have a fire for the two of you, and settle in an empty (at least, you hope was) hilichurl camp nearby to warm up in
★it was the norm now, and despite Bennett wanting you to just choose another team because he couldn't handle seeing you in pain from his luck, you had always reassured him that the unexpected turns of events because of his luck was just what you had loved about adventure, and you always trusted him to take care of you whenever something like that happened
★but of course, it was only a matter of time until it was Bennett himself who had hurt you
★you were both fighting a cryo abyss mage, the bastard’s protective shield already broken by Bennett’s elemental skill, causing the creature to start crawling on the ground pathetically
★you were sure its health had already decreased a significant amount that one slice could kill it off instantly, and you had wanted to give the final blow
★but Benny seemed to have a different idea
★the moment Bennett had saw you coming, it had been too late for him to stop, because the same moment you had ran towards the abyss mage, he had raised his sword and sliced the creature hard to the point that his sword had accidentally sliced your stomach as well
★thankfully, your clothes were thick enough that the cut hadn’t been deep enough to get stitches, but it still hurt so badly that you had fallen to the floor, clutching your stomach
★“y/n, what happened?!” he asked, too worried to remember that it had been him who did it, “are you okay?!- wait, no, that was a stupid question, let me see,”
★Bennett was an excellent team leader, but sometimes, he could be a little oblivious
★he gently lays you on his lap, taking out supplies from his belt. he had saw a glimpse of red, so he takes out towels to wipe the blood
★he had gently asked if he could lift your shirt, and when you had weakly nodded, he assessed the damage
★and that was when he had saw the burns by your cut
★burns. the abyss mage was a cryo one, and there wasn't any source of fire where you were but him
★Bennett felt his breath hitch, hands holding the towel clenching in fear. what had he done?
★“no, no, no,” he says in slight panic; this was exactly what he was afraid would happen, “no, no, y/n I’m so sorry. I was supposed to protect you,” his voice broke, gently pressing the towel on your wound to soak up the blood, and when he heard you hiss in pain, he felt tears well in his eyes, “I’m so sorry...”
★he knew the cut wasn’t deep, and you were going to be okay, but the mere thought that the fact you couldn't move and were in pain was because of his doing had caused Bennett to be unable to focus
★you were taken to Barbara immediately, Bennett carrying you bridal style the whole way back (he had been silent, while you had tried to start a conversation with lighthearted banter with him, he had only given you a half hearted laugh before focusing on his journey back) and was healed with a simple swish of the deaconess’ hands
★but afterwards, Bennett had started to spend less time outside of Mondstadt, saying that he had preferred to read at the library with you, and that was extremely unlike of him
★you knew it was because he was blaming himself for what had happened, so you had to let him know that you were fine, and that you knew that it was bound to happen anyways
★It would take a lot of reassurance for Benny to agree to even step a foot outside again, but in the end, it would be worth it to see his adventurer spirit once more
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bitterqueenofhearts · 3 years
Text
His World (I)
Warnings: age gap, alcohol consumption, mentions of sex
Sugar Daddy!Bucky AU x Reader - “a stranger at a party offers you more than the night”
WC: 2.3k
Note: Ahh I’m so happy to be writing again! It’s my first fic in years and I’m really excited about it. This is my entry for the Two Years of Darkness by @darkficsyouneveraskedfor​ !! I hope you enjoy reading it, please leave some feedback, likes and reblogs are super appreciated! (I intend to make this a 5 part fic)
Part I | Part II | Part III | Part IV | Part V
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As you mindlessly played with the straw from your drink, you wondered once again about your reasons to come to this party. When you got the invitation, it sounded like a great idea. A blind date at a party that you didn't know who was throwing and at a popular club on the fancy side of town. You rarely visited that neighborhood, and its tall buildings and fancy restaurants. You lived five minutes away from the university, on the opposite side of town. There were certainly more fitting places you could be visiting on that Saturday night, like a bar with cheap drinks and desperate frat guys. Okay, it's not like you preferred the frat boys either.
Yet, there you were, at a stranger's party, in a fancy club you've never visited before, having a boring date with some boring guy - what was his name again? That was the only huge disappointment, he barely bothered to ask your name or make small talk before indulging in a monologue about his family business... and then you both fell in empty silence, and you just drank your way trying to fill it.
You couldn't recognize anyone around you. Most of them looked like old money. Ivy leagues, business majors, heirs. Fancy designer dresses and purses, watches, and golden monogram buttons. Where the hell have you gotten yourself into? With a glance over your shoulder to check on your date - who was scrolling through his phone and seemed to have forgotten about you at that point, - you immediately excused yourself to get another drink or whatever. Tired of wasting time and patience, you grabbed your purse and walked towards the bar.
When you stood up, you could finally feel the alcohol from the last couple of drinks kick in. The loud music, mixed with the colorful lights and all the drunkness in the air made you let out a sigh. It felt like a chance in a lifetime to be at a place like this, and you were tired of wasting your time. An hour had already passed by and you really could use some actual fun - even if it wasn't your kind of place or your kind of people.
Another drink down - a shot of tequila this time - and you decided you wanted to dance. A remix of a familiar song blasted through the speakers, and that was the first time you noticed a DJ was playing. You chuckled to yourself, letting your body move in the rhythm with the music. The alcohol made the lights and colors brighter and the whole experience more comfortable than if you were sober. You felt even prettier now in that little silver strap dress than you did before.
A little while later, you felt eyes on you. Well, it felt like someone was staring. You slowly stopped dancing and looked around, and that's when your eyes were captured by a strong gaze. Piercing blue eyes that were so captivating you wouldn't dare look away.
He was sitting at a booth with a couple of friends, but his attention was completely yours. The man wore a black suit and a matching glove on his left hand, which rested on the table. His face... even from that distance, you could easily yearn just by taking a look at his gorgeous features.
Being stared at like that made you feel like prey, a piece of meat. Which shouldn't exactly feel like the best thing in the world, but you couldn't explain the chills running up your spine. You swallowed hard, feeling both intimidated and turned on before he broke the connection looking away.
As he simply looked away and resumed the conversation with his peers, you were left confused. The man was so attractive, like a movie star or runway model attractive, and looked way older than you too. And honestly, given the type of people there, he could easily be one. You wouldn't mind having a little fun with that rich man if you got the chance.
But that was it... Just one look, nothing else. For all you knew, he could be judging you - for looking so out of place? All the confidence from before seemed to dissipate for a moment. You had turned on your heels, thinking about going to the bathroom before wrapping up the night. You could fantasize about him doing whatever he wanted with you when you got home...
"You shouldn't stare, doll. It's not polite." A firm voice warned from somewhere close behind you. The chills were back in a nanosecond. Turning back around, searching for the source of the voice, and your eyes met the black suit that accompanied those stern blue eyes that found you on the dancefloor a moment ago. He was too close, you thought, before taking a step back and looking directly at him again.
"I'm sorry, what?" You chuckled just a little, almost nervously. It could come off as if you were playing dumb, but you could swear that wasn't the case. It was just that being called "doll" was something odd, but strangely enough, you didn't dislike it entirely. Besides that, the handsome stranger was right there in front of you, which was one step closer to your little fantasy becoming reality. Fuck your date.
You took the opportunity to take a better look at him. His short, dark hair was so perfectly fitting to his face and stubble. He could be at least ten years older than you, just from that look on his face. The kind of look that's so expressive and carries so many stories and much more experience than you could imagine. He could be thinking "don't play with me" or "I'll make you hear it loud and clear" or whatever your hazy mind could come up with in a deviant scenario.
Did you have a daddy kink? You didn't think so. It was a common thing, right? Men that look older and think they can boss you around... It was fun to think of it. It made you wet at times.
Again, your thoughts caught your attention and you couldn't understand what the sex deity in front of you had just said. You almost answered with an innocent "sorry, I was fucking you in my dreams", but that thought only made you giggle.
"How drunk are you?" He asked again because apparently, you didn't hear it the first time.
"Just enough to get all bubbly." You answered, simply. "I'm (Y/N), by the way." You offered a hand for him to shake. Let's be honest with a stranger, why not? What was the worst thing that could happen? It's not like the night could get any worse, and having a good talk with that man could never be the worst-case scenario.
He took your hand with his right - this one didn't have a glove on -, carefully but firmly, and you smiled at the way he held it. "I'm James Barnes. Friends call me Bucky." He seemed to be eyeing you up and down as well. You couldn't tell if he was worried by your state - even though you were just fine - or admiring you. Either way, it felt good to be under his gaze. Even better than before, with the chills easing on you.
At the mention of friends, you looked for the other two men who were sitting in the booth with him before - they were nowhere to be found. "I don't know anyone in this place. It's annoying." You confessed.
"I know." He had half a smile dancing on his lips, as he was amused by whatever you had said. "I'd remember inviting such a pretty little thing to my party."
Your lips formed an "o" as you heard the last words. Pretty little thing. Damn... "Wait, so it's your party!" That was kinda impressive, judging by the high standards of the club.
"Yes. And how did you end up here, doll?" His brows furrowed with what seemed to be genuine concern. How embarrassing would it be if you mentioned the failed date? Especially keeping in mind you very much wanted to score that handsome James Barnes tonight, from the very first moment his eyes laid on your figure.
"It's not a very interesting story." That was true. "But I promise I didn't sneak in." Another chuckle, followed by a delicate bite to your lip. Your drunk self thought that could be a sexy move, and maybe it worked because you noticed his eyes locked with your lips for a moment.
"Fine. You won't get in trouble..." He said very seriously. "...if you accept to join me for a drink. I'm unexpectedly bored by everyone else here, and I'd enjoy your... company." The invite was pretty clear, and so were his intentions. Inside, you jumped and cheered and celebrated that this hot piece of sin seemed to be just as into you, as you were into him. Trying to bite back the smile that covered your lips, you just nodded and followed the man, as he didn't drop your hand for a second since he took it.
xxx
Even though all your body could think about was sex in a neon sign, you two had a good talk before getting into the dirty business. He was a fun person to be around, complimented you at every chance he got and had such a powerful presence... You couldn't get enough of his banter, of his laugh, of his smile. The night was infinitely better now, because of James. He felt like an old friend you could be completely open about anything... And the alcohol only helped the feeling.
Of course, by the way he talked and how he was dressed, you couldn't forget he was very rich - and it would feel kinda weird if he wasn't so good at making you feel like you belonged to it all. Like you were part of this world. And you've been honest from the start, you told him about your life, that you paid for your education and that you lived on your own in a small apartment by the university.
While James... Yes, there was old money involved. But he never wanted to follow the family business, so he started a new path... entertainment. So he built a nightclub, and that was his full-time job! You were impressed by his determination and how wealthy he actually was. He owned one of the highest-ranked clubs in the city. And that explained... "his" party.
At some point, he wrapped his left arm around your shoulder, and you remembered about the single glove. "What's with the glove?" You mindlessly asked, almost missing when he clenched the jaw at the question.
"I can show you later." The way he stopped smiling just to answer in that harsh tone... Something felt off as if you had offended him somehow. But it wasn't entirely harsh. You could easily interpret that as a warning about how the night would go on... Oh, you and your dirty mind going at it again.
"Y/N." He interrupted your thoughts with a serious call of your name, not moving his hands from you. Your attention was completely his, and you dared to delve into his gaze once again.
"Yes, Bucky?"
He caressed your chin with the gloved hand and licked his lips before continuing. "You're such a precious girl. I can tell you're a smart one, as well." You just nodded, enamored by his words. "I could give you one night, and fulfill our desires. We could make some memories and then never see each other again, but that feels wrong. It would be such a waste..."
As he continued, you frowned for a moment. Where was he going with this? His hands never left you, and his handsome face only kept getting closer to yours. Sitting on that booth, where you knew most of the people couldn't see the two of you, but you felt under a spotlight at that moment. "What do you..."
James didn't let you finish your thought. As he inched closer, you felt his cologne mixed with whisky. His lips captured yours, and you couldn't thank him enough for finally making it happen. The kiss was hungry, full of desire, and lacking patience. But he determined the pace and kept it all under his control. Before you realized it, it was already over. And you almost whined as he pulled away, but he stayed close, dragging his lips across your neck with small pecks, taking in your perfume as deep as he could.
Was he as intoxicated by you as you were by him? Because it certainly felt like it. "Bucky..." You whispered.
"I want to propose an arrangement." He interrupted you, his words barely above a whisper in your ear. "Be mine. I will take care of you, you can keep me company. I can give you the world. My world. And in return, you just need to give yourself to me.
Those words echoed in your thoughts like a wonderful dream. You smiled thinking about it, and the alcohol got the best of you. With a giggle, you nodded and said whatever he wanted to hear. Of course, you could surrender yourself to him. Anything he asked for.
"You won't regret it, doll." Those were the last words you remembered from the night.
Little did you know, you had agreed to something you could only have dreamed of. When the man had set eyes on you in that club, he decided he wanted you for himself. And you fell right into Bucky Barnes' trap.
xxx
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luminnara · 3 years
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It’s Been A Long, Long Time | ch 4
Summary:  When HYDRA had their prized asset, the Winter Soldier, they did something no one ever thought was possible: they gave super soldier serum to an omega. With the sole purpose of tending to him during his ruts, she spends decades living in HYDRA facilities, denied her humanity and her life. Now, years later, Bucky Barnes has his mind and his own life back...and the last thing he ever expects is to see a familiar omega again. Bucky/OC, a little angsty but mostly smutty/fluffy/romantic!
Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five
Taglist:  @kyrah-williams @oceanmermaidwitch @shawnie--jo @super-cape @ferxaniti @namjoonwatcheshentai @fandomsstolemylife00 @youngblood199456 @nightlygiggless @darlingely
Amoretta swam in and out of sleep. Whenever she surfaced, she saw bright lights and strange faces, and, assuming that she was in a HYDRA lab, she decided it was better if she just kept on dreaming. After a while, though, she couldn’t manage it anymore, and she finally woke up enough to actually take in her surroundings.
She was in a hospital bed, and...a gown? She couldn’t remember the last time she had been given clothing. When she tried to move, she found that her arms ached, and she had an IV sticking out of her. Okay, so wherever she was, they were trying to take care of her. Maybe. That seemed like a good sign. 
“Oh, good, you’re awake,” a man’s voice said. “How’re you feeling?”
A figure came into view, blurry at first, and as he got closer she was able to get him in focus. Amoretta immediately stiffened, feeling threatened by this stranger, but as the scent of omega wafted in, she relaxed slightly. She couldn’t smell any alphas nearby, and that was good. 
Two good signs so far. 
“Wh-who are you?” She asked, her voice wobbly and hoarse. Her throat was so sore that talking was painful. 
“My name is Dr. Bruce Banner.” The man said, reaching towards a nearby table and grabbing a water bottle off of it. “I’m with the Avengers.”
Amoretta frowned. “The...who?”
He came near her slowly, twisting the cap off the bottle and offering it to her. “You’ve probably got a lot of questions. Mind if I ask a couple, though?”
She gave a little shrug as she raised the bottle to her lips. It felt strange to hold, the water tasting...different from what she was used to.
“Can you tell me your name?”
She thought for a moment, brows knitting together. “Subject 1096.”
It was Bruce’s turn to frown. “Did you ever have a...different name?”
After a moment, she nodded, trying to remember. It felt like it was on the tip of her tongue, just out of reach. Had it really been so long since she had gotten to say it?
“We can come back to that one.” Bruce said gently. “Do you know what year it is?”
She thought for a moment. “19...1986.”
The doctor pulled off his glasses, pinching the bridge of his nose and mumbling something along the lines of “Christ, not another one…”
She got the feeling that she was off by a few years. 
“Well, Ten...is it alright if I call you that?”
She shrugged.
“...alright. Ten, it seems like you were cryogenically frozen for a few decades.”
“...decades?”
He nodded. “Your body seems to have handled it well, though.”
“Did I puke?” She asked, wrinkling her nose.
“Not that I saw.” He chuckled. 
Well, that was a little surprising. She had a tendency to vomit after being wrenched out of unnaturally cold naps. “Where am I?”
“You’re in my lab, at Stark Tower.”
“What continent?”
“North America.”
She made a thoughtful noise. “What month is it?”
“June.”
“So Ursa Major is out?”
Bruce paused. “...well, it’s hard to see with all the light pollution in the city, but...yes, I suppose it should be…”
She let out a sigh. “I miss it.”
Her voice was already sounding tired again, and Bruce was quick to take the water bottle back before it slipped from her hand. 
“You should get some more rest, Ten.” He suggested. “We’ve got plenty of time to get you caught up when you’re feeling more energetic.”
“Mhm.” her eyes fluttered closed. “Doctor?”
“Yes?”
“What city am I in?”
“New York.” He said, looking down at her curiously. “Manhattan, more specifically. Why?”
She smiled a little. “I wanna see...Brooklyn…”
As she drifted off to sleep again, Bruce rubbed his face. Well, that certainly was oddly specific of her to say. It was a good sign that she seemed lucid, though. 
“Captain Rogers is outside, Dr. Banner.” FRIDAY’s AI voice said. 
Bruce met him at the door, making his way out as quietly as possible. Steve looked anxious, standing with his hands on his hips as he waited for news. He hadn’t gotten a chance to find Bucky yet, his friend either working out or sleeping, and all he had managed so far was a quick debriefing and a shower. 
“I ran down as soon as FRIDAY called,” he said. “How is she?”
“Sleeping again. Just missed her.” Bruce said wryly. “Walk with me, I’m starving.” 
Steve fell into step beside him, heading towards the elevators. “Did she say anything?”
“She did. She seemed a bit out of it...couldn’t remember her name, hasn’t been awake since 1986.” He hit the UP button and stood back. “Seemed very interested in constellations, though. And Brooklyn.”
Steve stared at him. “Brooklyn?”
“Told her she was in New York, and the last thing she said before she fell asleep was something about Brooklyn.” Bruce shrugged. “Really interesting thing was her blood tests, though.”
“Blood tests?” Steve asked, stepping into the elevator and waiting for Bruce to join him before the doors closed again. 
“Definitely an omega.” Banner said as they headed up several floors. “Her scent is so muted because they pumped her full of enough suppressants to kill a normal person. Pretty sure that’s why she’s so tired...her body is working overtime trying to process such a high dose. I think it was just pooling in her system while she was in cryo, not really going anywhere, so now her kidneys are doing everything they can to—“
“Banner.” Steve interrupted before he had to listen to an entire scientific explanation. 
“Right. Sorry.” The scientist cleared his throat. “There was something else that I found already. She’s, uh…well, at some point, she was given super soldier serum.” 
Steve froze. “HYDRA gave the serum...to an omega?”
“It’s confusing to me, too,” Bruce put his hands up in defeat. “Thanks to that, though, it’s hard to determine how old she is, or who she is, without her telling us. All I know is that she’s an unmarked omega super soldier with a hell of a dose of heat suppressants to work through.”
“Any idea when she’ll be up again?” Steve asked as the elevator dinged to signal their arrival. 
“Hard to say.” Bruce said, following the alpha out towards the shared kitchen near the common area. 
“I need to get to the bottom of this, Banner. FRIDAY, will you find Bucky? I need you to tell him—“
“Tell him what?” A voice asked. 
Steve smiled in relief. Bucky was there, sitting on the couch with a plate of Alfredo balanced in his metal hand, looking mildly curious about whatever his friend was talking about. 
“Oh, good,” Steve said, approaching him, Banner following behind. “You’re already here.”
“What is it, Stevie?” He asked, an eyebrow raised. 
“Well, as you know, I visited an abandoned HYDRA base today.” 
“I’m aware.”
“And I found...something.”
“...something. What kind of something?”
Steve suddenly wasn’t sure how to describe his discovery. “Well, it’s a...not an it, I mean, I found a…”
“Rogers here brought back an omega test subject.” Bruce interrupted. “She’s down in the lab right now sleeping off some nasty meds.”
Bucky’s posture hadn’t changed, despite how awkward and almost nervous Steve had gotten. He leaned back against the cushions, slurping down a few noodles while he regarded his friend with a mild expression. 
“Alright, so?” He asked. 
“So...I was wondering if you had any idea what HYDRA was doing experimenting on an omega.” Steve said, hands on his hips in a stance that was supposed to say I mean business, so listen to me.
Bucky wasn’t bothered by it. He was the biggest, toughest alpha in the tower, aside from the rare occasions Thor was roughing it down on Midgard with the rest of them. The others could puff up and posture all they wanted at him, but it never had any effect. He was always calm and cool, generally disinterested in their displays. He knew he was stronger, and he didn’t need to prove it, especially not when he didn’t have an omega to fight over. 
He shrugged. “I want exactly privy to all their secrets. I know they kept cells full of omegas around for a while.”
“What did they do with them?” Steve asked.
“Whatever they wanted?” Bucky shook his head. “I really don’t know. If they were experimenting on ‘em, that never concerned me.”
“You’ve gotta know something, Buck.” Steve sounded exasperated. 
“Why do you care so much?” He asked. 
“Because something isn’t adding up.” Steve growled. 
“They gave this omega enough heat suppressants to last a lifetime,” Bruce said. “Her system is all kinds of messed up.”
“Makes sense.” Bucky ate another mouthful. “HYDRA wouldn’t want to deal with hormones going crazy or any unplanned pups.”
Steve stared down at his friend. “Did they let you rut?”
“Stevie, at least take me out to dinner before you start asking about my sex life fifty years ago.” Bucky said dryly. 
Steve just raised an eyebrow.
“...yeah. They did. Think they couldn’t stop my ruts.” He relented. 
“So did they...you know…” Steve trailed off awkwardly. 
“Were you ever given omegas to get you through them?” Bruce asked, proving once again how much more capable of having this conversation he was than Steve. 
Bucky finally had to glance away from them in embarrassment. “Well…yeah. But I, uh...the Soldier, he would just kind of...well, they didn’t really last long, if you uh. Catch my drift.”
Steve paled. 
Bruce gulped. 
“...what? Look, I’m better now, I’m way past that. Besides, I never meant to hurt anyone, I wasn’t myself—“
“This omega is a super soldier.” Bruce said quietly.
Bucky’s face dropped, a flicker of something passing over his face. “...what?”
“Finally,” Bruce sighed happily, inhaling the smell of leftover pizza. 
“Bucky, does the number 1096 mean anything to you?” Steve asked. He was sitting in a chair across from his friend, Bruce sitting at the kitchen island while he ate his dinner. 
Bucky shook his head. “Don’t remember any numbers like that. They mostly just called ‘em all omega.”
He was trying to seem cool and collected, but his scent had shifted slightly. Steve could catch just the slightest hint of distress in it, and as he did so, he narrowed his eyes. He may have been separated from Bucky for almost 80 years, but he was still his best friend, and he could tell when he was hiding something. 
“Why would they give the serum to an omega?” Steve asked. 
“Branching out?” Bucky shook his head. “Why do they do anything? They’re HYDRA. They can do whatever they want.”
“So you don’t remember anything about an omega super soldier?”
“I don’t know.” Bucky sniffed defensively. 
“Buck, it’s okay if you do.” Steve growled. “We’re not going to judge you for anything you did. We just want to help her and figure out who she is—“
“Well I don’t know,” Bucky snapped, big fangs bared in a warning. 
Steve responded with a low growl. 
“There’s a lot I don’t remember, or did you forget how many times they wiped my memory?” 
“Seems like you’re hiding something, Buck, and I wanna know what it is.”
“Why do you care? You should just drop it,” Bucky snarled. 
Steve regarded him carefully. Oh yeah. He was definitely hiding something. 
“Hey, hey,” Bruce interrupted from the kitchen, intent on stopping their fight before it could start. “Relax, fellas. Don’t make me get the big guy out to shut you both up.”
Steve backed down. The threat of having the Hulk going after him was enough. Bucky didn’t seem to share the sentiment, though, his lips still pulled back in a blatant display of aggression. It was the first time in a while that Steve had seen him acting so defensively about something, and it was concerning, to say the least. 
“Buck,” he said, voice low with warning. “Are you hiding something?”
Bucky’s nostrils flared angrily and the insinuation that he was keeping secrets, but he managed to reign himself back in, stifling another growl with a loud sigh. 
“I dunno, Steve.” He admitted. “There’s...a lot I don’t remember. If I’m bein’ honest with you, I’m not even sure why I’m feelin’ so worked up about this.”
Steve nodded. It was a relief to hear that Bucky wasn’t acting this way entirely on purpose, at least. 
“You feel okay?” Steve asked. “Not rutting soon, are you?”
“I’m fine, Steve.”
“You sure?”
“I’m sure.” Bucky snorted. After a moment of silence, he spoke up again. “Is the omega, uh...is she okay?”
“Physically, she doesn’t seem to be too worse for wear,” Bruce said from the kitchen. “The only abnormalities I found in our preliminary blood tests were evidence of the suppressants and the serum. Other than being exhausted and needing to adjust to consciousness again after decades of cryo, she’s fine.”
“Good.” Bucky said, a little too quickly. “I mean...that’s good.”
“She should be awake again by tomorrow. Hopefully, she’ll be up for a longer chat then.” 
“You comfortable talking with her?” Steve asked, looking at Bucky. “It might be good for her to see someone else who used to be connected to HYDRA. Might help her ease into everything.”
Bucky gave a nod, already distracted by thoughts of this omega. Was it possible that the girl he saw in his dreams was real? It was hard for him to know what had actually happened to him and what he had imagined, what with HYDRA wiping his memory whenever they felt like it. Ever since he had gained his mental freedom, though, he had been plagued with nightmares, his sleep always filled with the faces of people he had killed. 
As time went on, they were getting better, but they never really stopped. He just...didn’t always have to deal with the worst ones. Sometimes, he even got to have dreams that were...nice. Sometimes, he dreamt of a familiar scent, one he couldn’t really place and that he could never remember when he woke up. Sometimes, he dreamt of an omega, with long, dark hair, and the prettiest eyes he could ever imagine. He always saw her in flashes, a smile here, a sigh there, and with no idea as to who she was or where she came from, he had chalked it up to his mind trying to give him some relief from the nightmares. It had to be wishful thinking, and nothing more. 
Unless it wasn’t. 
He spent a while chatting with Steve and Bruce before retreating to his apartment. With Tony and Pepper gone for the night, spending it in some fancy hotel so that Stark could give a talk at some expo, and most of the others resting after missions, the tower was quiet. It left Bucky too much time to wander and think, and before he knew it, he was making a detour down to Banner’s lab. 
As soon as the elevator doors opened, he paused. What was he hoping to accomplish, exactly? He didn’t have the kind of clearance that Bruce did. He wouldn’t be able to sneak in, and even if he could, what would he do? Appearing at her bedside would just freak the poor omega out, and that wasn’t the kind of first impression he liked to leave these days. 
He shook his head, pressing the button for his floor and leaning back against the elevator wall. He needed to be patient. Tomorrow, when she woke up, he would be able to see her for himself and decide if his weird dreams had any truth to them. 
Not that he was getting his hopes up. He shouldn’t, after all. He would just set himself up for disappointment. 
Just before the elevator doors slid shut, though, the tiniest, faintest hint of a scent wafted in, and Bucky’s eyes widened. He knew it. He knew that scent, or at least...he used to know it. Somewhere, in a part of his mind that he tried to forget about, he had memories of a peaceful, starry night sky, a hint of pine, and a touch of cinnamon. 
Then, the doors closed, and it was gone again, leaving him confused as the elevator rushed upwards.
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amoristt · 3 years
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Grazing the Fire | IV
well hello. here i am, four years later, once again enamored with nathan enough to finally dust this baby off and pick up where i left it. im a little rusty so bear with me this chapter! much more to come <3
reblogs + tags and replies will make my entire day as i put a lot of effort into this :)! it also helps motivate me!
story continues beneath the read more. let me know if you can’t access it!
Warning: language, very vague s/a mentions
want to support me? heres my kofi!
__________________________
“Alright class, who can tell me,” A board stick clacks against the chalkboard. “Who can answer problem four?” 
A few hands raise in the corners of your eye, but yours remains atop your desk. Eyes far away, mind in a murky haze and almost completely unaware. All you could focus on were the memories playing on repeat within the confines of your tired, tired brain. Hours ago, you were warm, you were comfortable. Safe.
Cheeks heated to a dusting blush when you remind yourself just how you had awoken that morning. At some point in the night, an angel had blessed you. Allowed you to wake up wrapped around none other than big, bad, Nathan Prescott. Your face nuzzled into his chest, broad but wiry hands pressed firmly over your shoulder and his arm slung over your waist to keep you against him. Thankfully you had been the first to wake up, blinking away the morning sun blazing through his blinds and painting the room stripes of gold. At that moment, before your headache came crashing down onto your skull, you were astounded by him. 
Eye lashes brushing the top of his cheeks, his lips parted ever so slightly, chest rising and falling rhythmically. In that moment, there was no anger, no bitterness. Just a soft and peaceful slumber. It was like being the sole viewer of a magnificent painting- each stroke and detail placed just there just for you to pick out, to remember the curves and sharp edges down to the very foundation. From his unkempt hair down to the way his hand flattened onto the mattress where your indent still lived. Nathan was so beautiful like this. 
For a long time you stayed there. It was as though you were afraid to move- you couldn’t bear to disturb him. You had wondered, if he was always like this, so at peace, what would he be like? Likely soft voiced, mild mannered. He’d do his school assignments without hassle and donate to the charity board. He would wander the town with his friends and listen to music in a beat up truck flying down the stretch of highway overlooking the bold, blue, and beautiful ocean. An entirely different version of himself- carefree, and a fair blue as opposed to a burning flame of red. 
But, if that were the case, you’d never have gotten here. You’d never been both the outsider, and the only seeing eye. A lucky, albeit firstly unwilling witness to the display of depth before you. 
It never hit you like it had quite in that moment how lucky you were.
But- just then- an alarm disturbed what serendipity existed. You nearly leapt out of your skin, clutched your hands to your chest at the sudden sound. A headache wove its way into your once untouched temples. Nathan groaned, mumbled, ‘god damn it’, under his breath, and thus his body was reanimated into life. He rubbed his eyes and he stretched, that familiar scowl coming over his eyes and lips as he took in the sunlight damn near blinding him. A polar opposite to the being you’d appreciated just moments earlier.
“Ugh, fuck, how the fuck is it seven already.” He groaned. “I feel like shit.”
“Well good morning to you too,” You started, welcoming Nathan into the world. “‘I’m feeling pretty shitty as well.” 
You said that, but really… You were more than alright. Your head had hurt, slight nausea crept into the wells of your stomach, but other than that you’re sure you were phenomenally better than you’d have been waking up whereverTate would have left your ass.
“You need to get outta here, before everyone gets up.” Nathan drawled, but he didn’t sound as urgent as you expected him to be. You’d expected him to be angry that you were still in his room, but instead he just… accepted it. 
You snickered, climbing out of his throne of a bed. “Wow, you’re giving me the morning after treatment?” 
“Sure am. Get outta here, whore.”
“Oh fuck you.” 
You located your heels from last night, resting upright near his dorm room door. Heels didn’t sound like the most  practical to sneak out of a dorm with, so you instead opted to grappling them by the straps and carrying them at your side. Hair a mess, outfit riddled with wrinkles and makeup smudged under your eyes, you stood before Nathan in all your glory. He stared at you for a long, odd moment- and you for some reason felt exposed, or even, shy. 
“What?” You ask expectantly, placing a hand on your hip. 
His eyes trail to your line of vision. He shakes his head. “Just thinking about how now you really do look like my morning after.”
“Yeah?” You hummed. “Find it hard to believe you get a lot of those.”
Nathan shoots you a suggestive glance. “You’d be surprised. Everyone wants a piece of Prescott.”
Surely, he was joking, or maybe he wasn’t, but you… Didn’t like hearing that. It made your stomach feel odd, uncomfortably heavy.  As he stood up, reminding you how many inches he had over your size, you swallowed and cleared your throat to flush out that crappy feeling. “Well,” you started, mood having dropped. “I’m gonna go, then.” 
“What got your panties in a twist all the sudden?” He asked, raising a brow and pulling some clothes from his closet, tossing them onto the bed.
The bed you two had shared.
You hated the idea of his morning afters- whoever they may be. 
“Not feeling great. Probably a side effect of the roofies.” You mumbled.
Nathan breathed a laugh. “Probably.”
He seemed so calm, right now. Perhaps due to it being so early, before the outside world had a chance to remind him just why he was so uptight all the tight. Before he needed to be so uptight all the time. He really did have so many versions of himself- all of whom you were slowly becoming familiar with. Compared to the person you’d believed him to be before your run ins, you’d never have assumed someone so dangerous could be so soft as last night, as this morning. In the beginning, you’d feared him. Avoided him like a plague, or a wild animal. Even when you were enraptured in the existence of him, you still wanted to keep away. You’d never have believed someone like you could wake up clutched to his chest, as though he were afraid if he released you, you’d be gone long before he woke. 
Then, a sudden thought struck your mind. 
He’d held you so tight. He’d welcomed you in the morning. No anger, no annoyance. His soft laugh at your banter and taunts. How your heels were standing upright instead of tossed haphazardly into some random corner, where he’d watch your struggle to find. 
How he’d stayed awake to ensure your sleep.
“So are you just gonna stand there?” Nathan called you back to reality, hands gripping the hems of his shirt. “I gotta get ready and you need to wash up so you don’t look like a five dollar stripper.” Cruel words, but with absolutely no bite. You rolled your eyes.
“Yeah. But, hey,” You started. “Thank you for last night.” 
“Yeah, yeah. You gotta start learning to watch your own back.” He says. “There’s gonna be times I won’t be there to drag your ass out of the fire.”
If you’d been charged, if you’d been stricken with a strange defensiveness, you’d have retorted, ‘than stop helping me’, but… Instead you allowed yourself the comfort of protection. You allowed Nathan Prescott to watch you.  
“I know,” You reached for the door. “Thank you.”
With that, you bounded out of the dorm silent as a mouse. 
-----------
In hindsight, you should have left earlier. Class was merely 15 minutes away when you slipped out of Nathan's room and bounded towards the women's dorm. Albeit not exactly a long walk, by the time you discreetly snuck back into your own dorm, you had roughly twenty minutes to somehow pick an outfit from your countless unopened boxes and make yourself even slightly presentable. 
Wiping off whatever make-up you could get and reapplying it, brushing out the tangles of your hair and nearly tearing off your scalp in the process, scattering your nightclothes over your floor and managing to scrounge out a semi-decent outfit for the day… You still looked a mess. If the mirror could laugh, it would have. Black mascara smudges under your eyes and frizzy untreated hair. What a lovely look. 
You’d made it to class just five minutes late, but those five minutes were all it took for all eyes to be on you as you tried to slide into the classroom unnoticed. A couple classmates whispered to their table mates as you passed by, smelling of oversaturated cherry blossom perfume to hopefully cover the scent of alcohol. You sauntered to your seat and sank down with all your weight, suddenly exhausted. You’d made it with just five minutes tainting your record of attendance. The teacher greeted you with a disappointed sigh, and thus, the day began. 
But, it was so hard to focus. All you could think about was Nathan. 
“Alright class, who can tell me,” A board stick clacks against the chalkboard. “Who can answer problem four?” 
You lowered your head. 
“Ah, how about, ___?”
You snaked back into reality, blinking up at the chalk board that was somehow already riddled with math equations. Since you hadn’t been paying attention even in the slightest, your mouth gaped wide open, eyes scanning for something you understood even slightly so you didn’t look like a total idiot. 
Sadly, you were out of luck. The teacher shook his head. “I’m shocked,” He said. “You're normally so on top of things. Oh well.”
“Oh, I’m sure she was on top of things,” A female voice sniggered behind you “Last night.”
Your face flushed a red, hot, ruby. What the hell was she talking about? How had they found out you were with Nathan? You were so sure of being sneaky, there was no way-
“Her and Tate totally got it on last night.”
You whipped around in your seat, facing girls who looked to be clones of some sort. Both with the same dark eyes, short brown hair, and freckles. “What?”
“Alright-” Your teacher blurted. “That's enough. April, May, enough. Let’s not discuss things outside of the classroom.”
The two girls batted their eyes. “Sorry sir.” One spoke, twirling a hand through her hair. Her sister's wide toothy grin never fumbled. 
“Back to it then. Kate, can you help out __ with number four?” 
The small, blonde girl nodded quickly, brushing a lock of hair behind her eyes and offering an empathic nod. 
As you turned around in your seat, her answer fell on deaf ears. Your heart was racing in your chest, hands balled into fists while you stared ahead blankly.  
They couldn’t seriously think that you chose to leave with Tate, could they? Surely someone must have seen the state you were in. Someone other than Nathan.
The clock ticks forward but time feels like it's passing almost unnaturally slow. With just 10 minutes left, you feel your phone vibrate in your pocket.
‘Nathan: consider ur favor officially returned 
Your tongue poked from your lips, the tiniest of smiles taking over your once sullen features. Terrible thoughts and worries flew out the window while you type back, ‘damn. here i was gonna to ask you to do a backflip off the roof with me. there goes my plans.’
Nathan types for a moment. Typing, stopping, typing again. 
‘Nathan: soundz like a blast. where and when?’
A small blush heats your cheeks. ‘very funny. thanks to last night i have an entire 24 hour session of studying to catch up with.’
His response is almost instant. ‘Nathan: boringgg. txt me when ur fun.’
Rolling your eyes, you shove your phone back into your pocket. It seems you’ve been able to secure enough of a friendship with him for some mindless banter even outside your little visits. You smile. He’s… Fun to talk to. Surprisingly. 
Class comes to an end and you start to pack up the books and papers you’d hardly even glanced at the whole period. Whatever had been upsetting you before is lost in your mind while you think of the morning, the night before. All the things in-between. But, your happiness doesn’t last long. As you get up, you’re almost forced right back into your seat as a weight shoves into your shoulder. Your books scatter to the floor. April, the one who’d remarked about you earlier, glares at you in what looks to be disgust. 
“Careful April,” Her sister hums as she saunters past you, keeping distance and raising her already shrill tone of voice. “Might wanna watch where you’re walking- I’d hate for you to catch something from this slut.”
You absolutely gawk at her. “What the fuck did you just say to me?”
April scoffs. “Oh come on, like everyone doesn’t know what you were up to last night.”
“Sleeping around isn’t a good color on you.” May hikes her bag over her shoulder and snickers at you. They both leave the class together, sickeningly in sync. You’re left stunned where you stand, unsure how the hell your life came to this so quickly. How you’ve stooped so low that the daughters of the world's most uncreative parents are able to bully you based on something that didn’t even happen.
Next class goes no better. The person to your right, a jockey looking brunette guy, asks, ‘have you ever heard of a Tate?’. You say no, that that’s the dumbest name you’ve ever heard. The idiot grins and goes back to marking down likely wrong answers on his test sheet and you debate kicking the leg of his chair out- but you don’t to avoid even more eyes on you. It makes you sick to your stomach- even more than recovering from the roofies does. How can everyone believe it? You barely even knew the guy and you were clearly uncomfortable with his advances. No one saw that? 
After everything you’d worked for to build a reputation, trying so hard to not call out peoples shit for the sake of seeming friendly, tainted over something that didn’t even happen? And the kicker was that it hadn’t even been your fault! He’d drugged you, he’d have taken advantage of you! Yet you were the bad person? 
Class came and went in the blink of an eye this time. Your mind wrapped up in the situation, your stomach churning. You wanted the day to be over with but you still had 4 more classes to suffer through. Why was this happening to you? Was Tate being treated just as horribly, or was he getting pats on the backs of his unaware friends?
Wandering down the halls to your locker, you noticed Lance and Kaz hanging around one of the drinking fountains. Your nerves quelled- your friends would surely make you feel much better. Especially since they had witnessed how awful you were feeling as you left. You approach with a relieved smile, ready to say your truth and finally have someone on your side.
“Hey guys.” You smile, but Lance looks down at his feet while Kaz places her hands to his hips. Your smile fades.
“You could have told us you were gonna spend the night with Tate,” Kaz snaps. “You didn’t need to lie like that just to leave. We were all worried about you and it was for nothing.”
“What?” You feel like you could cry. “No, Kaz, I really did try to leave. Tate tried to drug me and take me home, and-”
“He wouldn’t do that.” Lance interrupts, with a frown. He looks back down at the floor with knitted brows. “I’ve known Tate since before time. He wouldn't do something like that, especially not to one of my best friends. Plus he told me he was really into you. Why would he even try?”
“Are you serious?” You sputter. “You think I’d lie about something like that?”
“You’ve been lying about all sorts of things!” Kaz huffs. “What’s going on with you lately? You’ve been so distant, and secretive. What are you hiding that’s making you lie like this? We’re supposed to be your friends and then you lie to our faces just to go and fuck the first guy that shows you attention.”
“What…?” It was like acid. It was like the rug had been pulled from your feet sending you spiraling down the unending cliff. Kaz, your best friend, all that venom. How could they turn against you like this? What the hell is going on? You felt your throat tighten. “Look, I’m sorry if I’ve been distant, but I’m not lying to you, I-”
“We gotta go.” Lance isn’t in the mood to hear it. “We’ll catch up to you.. Some other time.”
Kaz says nothing as she pushes past you. Lance, at least, spares a short glance over his shoulder. You stood there alone in the hallway, your bag falling off your shoulder and clattering onto the floor with a thud echoing off the walls. Everything you had, all gone at once. 
No one believed you.
---------
With nowhere to go where you felt like you could truly allow yourself to process the day's events, you went to the only place you knew. 
Just outside of campus, where rocks lined the edge of the boundary, overlooking the outskirts of the town and the ocean stretching as far as the eye could see. You settled yourself there, staring at the vast waters and wondering how this had all happened. Unlucky didn’t even begin to cover how it felt. Not only did you feel violated with Tate attempting to do unthinkable things with your unconscious body, but you also felt alone, and walked on. Your best friends hadn’t believed you. While Lance seemed saddened, Kaz was so… Angry. Her words cut like knives into your skin. 
It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair. You didn’t deserve this.
You want to talk to Nathan, but knowing him, he’d see your state and bounce instantly. After all, this isn’t exactly very fun of you.
As the sun began to fall, splaying orange and blues over the wide open sky, behind you, you could hear voices. A group of them, some male, some female. Memories of when your notebook had gotten snatched by those two horsed face assholes came flooding back and with all your alertness, you stood up, and decided that this sitting place was no longer safe. Nothing was.
Before you even made it ten feet away, the group had found their way to your spot and gotten comfortable, one of the girls cheering, ‘this’ll be our hangout! look at how pretty the view is!’
You took a short drive down the stretches of road and decided that if you were going to lament in your own sadness, you were at least going to do so in a place that had something to cover the sound of your tears. Plus a nice view.
The beach, littered with its picnic tables and the sounds of crashing waves would suffice just fine. So, you pulled in the desolate parking lot and wandered down the sandy shores until you stumbled upon a picnic table shaded by a large willow cascading lushious branches to block out the sun- a perfect canopy for you to wallow under. 
You had nothing at that moment. No friends, no reputation, no one to believe your tragic tale. And now, you’d just lost the one spot that made you feel comfortable when stress was building into your body like concrete. Tears pricked into the corners of your eyes and you bit your lip, dreading that feeling of a lump in your throat. Why you? Everything had been going so well. How could not even a single person believe that Tate had tried to hurt you?
Well, actually, there was one person.
Of course Nathan believed you. He’d been the one to rescue you, after all. Time and time again it seemed.  How was it that even the ones closest to you would turn their back so fast, yet Nathan seemed to be there even when you didn’t want him to be? Even when you yelled at him, and he yelled right back, fire and sparks falling into embers around the two of you. 
In that moment, you almost felt like you could finally relate to him. A reputation based on lies and things out of your control, paired with a hardheaded attitude to try and combat all the assumptions. 
No wonder he was so angry. 
“Hey bitch,” A voice suddenly called, and you had a split second moment where you were terrified of once again being the victim of a cruel prank or some classmates boredom. “How about next time you have a pity party you don’t fucking call me in the middle of it.”
You blinked away your tears and through the blurriness saw a figure coming towards you. All that sass, the tone...
“Nathan?” You breathed. It only takes moments before he’s in front of you, holding his phone in view, seeing that the call that had been running for nearly ten minute. You flush in embarrassment, pulling your phone from your back pocket. “How did that happen?”
“Well, can your ass dial numbers?” He taunts, ending the call. 
“Damn it, dumb phone must have butt-dialed you. I knew I should’ve gotten a different one.” You mentally kick yourself. “It must have unlocked in my pocket.”
“You don’t have a password on your phone?” He taunts. When you shake your head, he whistles. “You are just begging for a robbery. I’ll keep that in mind when I’m in the mood to send random messages to all your buddies.” 
“Fuck off.” You scowl, and he grins, hopping up on the picnic table next to you. The sun flatters his skin. He’s almost glowing. 
“Speaking of buddies, how the hell did it pick my number out of your sea of friends?”
You shrug. “Probably cuz’ it’s a priority contact.” 
“Oh lala, I’ve been upgraded to priority huh? Does it display a superman logo whenever you give it a ring?”
“Nope. When I press call it rings the nearest asshole in my vicinity. The fact that it’s you is your own problem.”
“Haha, fucking ha.” He leans forward and rests his elbows on his knees. He stares out at the water, watching waves pull and crash onto the beach. It’s almost beautiful, until he ruins it. “Yknow, you’re a really ugly crier.”
“Wow, thanks.” You shake your head. “That's exactly what I needed to hear right now. Why did you even stay on the line?.” Wiping your eyes, you start to forget your tears. “Couldn’t have been that wild of a conversation.”
Nathan shrugs. “Between the crying and the sound of the waves it was pretty nice.” He grins. “Very educational.” 
“Awesome. Glad I was able to make your day.” It doesn’t feel like your usual bitey remarks. You’re tired, you’re still a little hurt and you can’t stop thinking about how such an amazing morning had turned into such a horrible day.
“So what’s got you all fucked up? Never seen you act like this big of a baby before.”
“Nothing. You already paid off your debt to me per this morning, so feel free to resume our regularly scheduled mutual hatred.” You say, lying through your teeth. You know you’re both past the point of hatred, but you’re feeling jaded, you can’t help it. 
“Oh shut the fuck up,” He groans. “I didn’t drag my ass all the fucking way out to this shit hole of a beach just for you to give me that bullshit. What, did you fail a test? No one matched you on tinder?”
“Everyone thinks me and Tate slept together last night.” You blurt. “I think he’s telling people me and him had sex.”
Nathan tenses his shoulders and grimaces. “Fucking werido.”
“I told my best friends that he tried to take advantage of me and they don’t believe me. One of em’ even said he wouldn’t do something like that.”
“Fuck em’. Who needs best friends.”
“And to make everything so much better, these two bitches that I share four of my classes with harassed me all goddamn day. I mean, fucks sake, how the hell are girls named April and May of all things able to get to me. It’s bullshit. And to make matters worse, Tate is just… Getting away with it.”
“Yeah well, something tells me that Tate’s gonna get a real nice fucking taste of medicine eventually. I just gotta find him first. He’s got a lot of nerve spreading shit around given I knocked his ass onto the pavement.” Nathan brows knit at the memory.
You test the waters. “Why would you do that for me?”
He seems caught off guard, or maybe, surprised that you’d ask. Maybe he thinks you’re both beyond that point. He grumbles, “Why does it matter.”
“I’m just curious. We don’t owe each other anything, remember?”
“Yeah, well,” He huffs. “Don’t ask me questions to shit I don’t know the answer to.”
“You say that an awful lot.” You tease.
“Yeah well you ask dumbass questions an awful lot. Not everything I do has to have some weird ass motives behind it, ___. Maybe I’ve got beef with Tate that’s outside of you.”
“Uhuh. Sure.” You’re about to say something else, when your phone lights up with a text. The display makes your heart fall all over again. 
Unknown Number: you should just pack up and go somewhere else. no one wants std’s from breathing your air xoxo
You don’t even know who that is. Now absolute strangers are on your case. You want to throw your phone into the ocean and leave.
Nathan scoffs. “Don’t even bat a fucking eye for that bitch, whoever the hell they are. Half the hoes you’ve mentioned have slept with half the football team,” he pinches his jacket, “and I would know.”
“Ew, Nathan,” You grimace, that same feeling from the morning returning. It feels, oddly, like jealousy.  He nudges your arm with his elbow and grins playfully. It’s cute.
“Chill, I’m just fucking with you. You gotta know even I wouldn’t fuck girls that desperate. I’m a man of class.”
That last comment actually forces a laugh from you. It’s soft, but it’s real. The first laugh you’ve genuinely had all day. “That’s horrible.” You remark, giggling again.
It's almost like the slight restoration of your mood puts him at ease as well. He leans back on his hands and stares off into the ocean, those sparkling waters under the setting, orange sun. “I’m for real though. Those hoes aren’t worth your time. One day when we blow this shithole of a town they’re not even gonna matter.”
Your brows knit, eyes blinking up at him. Had you heard that right? 
“We?” You ask, perplexed, albeit a little… Hopeful.
Nathan sputters. “Well- Like, when everyone’s older and-”
“You know what, it's fine.” You interrupt. “Fuck it. You’re right. We’re gonna blow this town and they’re just gonna be some shitty memories.”
He sucks in a shaky breath. You’ve never heard him scramble like that, like he’s been unmasked. The look he casts you when you agree, when you don’t tease or patronize and finally hop on the idea that yeah, what if the two of you really didn’t have to deal with it anymore.
What if the two of you could just exist, without the anger. 
You look up at him. “Would you actually do that though?” You start. “With me, of all people?”
He swallows. His expression is tense, but he’s not upset. He appears nervous, caught off guard. Nathan tries, “I-”
Your phone rings. Shrill, piercing. Mood destroying. 
“Jesus Christ, it’s my mom.” You grab your phone and Nathan looks forward, stone faced and silent as you hop off the table and answer. It’s your mother, who all but shouts into the phone that her and your father are taking a surprising visit to Arcadia Bay while they’re traveling by on their vacation. She insists that you be ready in about an hour for dinner, and likely there will be family photos. 
Which means if you still look as wrecked as you did this morning, you’re gonna have a lot of washing up to do. With a quick goodbye, a short and sweet, ‘love you’, you hang up and sigh. 
“You still tell your mom you love her?” He teases. “What are you, five?”
You frown. “You don’t tell your parents you love them?”
Nathan side eyes you, and just shrugs. It is all the answer you need, really, and for his sake you decide it wouldn’t be best to press the issue. Not now. But- it still makes your heart hurt just a little. You wished that he’d had it better growing up. 
“Right… Do you want a ride home?”
“Fuck no, what am I,” He shoves his hands into his pockets. “a fucking girl scout?” 
“I was just offering, weirdo.” When he doesn't get up, you feel like you’re missing out. Like if you stayed, maybe, just maybe, you’d get to know him a little better. “Hey, if you want, I can stay for a bit longer.”
He rolls his eyes. “You’re needed elsewhere. But,” he shrugs. “I don’t know. Fuckin’... Text me or something. Or not, I don’t care either way.”
There’s a small warmth in your chest that rises to your cheeks. He wants you to text him. “Yeah,” You say. “If I’m feeling fun.”
And with that, you bid him farewell, beginning your descent to the parking lot. 
“Hey,” He calls, and you turn just in time to catch a small item he’s tossed right at you. A tiny key resides in the palm of your hand. “Spare. If shit hits the fan again-...” He shrugs, and actually looks away. “Just don’t be too fucking loud of I’ll kick your ass out myself. No Madison needed.”
The widest grin plays over your lips. “I’m gonna re-decorate your room while you’re gone.”
“Ah, you fucking better not.” He shouts. “Actually- you know what, give it back.” 
“No, no! I’m sorry.” You play with the key between your fingers. “Thanks for this.”
“Yeah, whatever. Don’t lose it and remember- emergencies only. I don’t need you watching me sleep like fucking freak. We’re past that stage.” 
“How many times will I have to say I was never watching you. Christ… But, alright. See ya, then.” The key is heavy in your palm. 
You place it into your pocket and give him one last glance before you take off, leaving him to enjoy the sound of waves, birds, and the absence of your tears.
176 notes · View notes
jeonfiles · 3 years
Text
better left unsaid - jjk
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genre: angst, rebounds
pairings: jungkook x reader (ft. namjoon)
warnings: arguing, alcohol, profanity, break ups, light smut, use of drugs, jungkook is a fucking dick, jungkook has major attachment issues, toxic relationships, oc cries a lot, namjoon has a heart of gold, unrequited love
synopsis: you knew you shouldnt have given him that second chance, not the third or the fourth either. no matter how much you try he always slithers his way underneath your sheets, arms wrapped around you.
word count: 2.7k
music: into your arms, so it ends?, you will fade, thinkin bout you, julia, my insecurities not yours, fuck u, goodluck, my dear i will think of you
note: uhh ive never written a y/n fic so bare with me, if u listen to the music you’ll be able to feel the story a lot more so yeah if u have time u should, not proof read
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Light coming through the cracks of the blinds, making you squint your eyes when the daylight beams into your eyes, head resting on the kitchen island Looking up, you saw the clock ticking on the wall, 11:32 am.
You had stayed up till 5 am, waiting for him to come home, but seemingly, he never did. Reaching for your phone, you saw 4 missed calls from the one and only,
Jeon Jungkook, saved in your phone as “Koo <3″, Rows of messages too, all from the same contact.
Koo <3 [05:34 am]
baby pkck me up pleseee
im so wsated
Koo <3 [06.46am]
dont be mad at me jsut pick me up
i dont knw hewere the fuck i am
i love you
Koo <3 [07:31 am]
i got a rde home i’ll be home by 12
i need to talk to someone frsit
im sorry if i woke ypu dont be worried
You took a few moments to collect your thoughts, but there wasn’t much to collect. This whole thing, was a routine by now.
Standing up to make yourself a cup of coffee, you could literally not feel your own backside, you were so sore from the barstool you had been sitting on all night, and it made you groan in pain.
Two coffee cups right beside the kitchen sink, which you couldn’t bring yourself to clean up, because it was from the last time you had coffee together, which was 2 weeks ago.
The inside of the cup had a coffee crust at the top, and both your lip tint marks on the outside.
When you finish your cup of coffee while watching a bad telenovela, you go sit in your favorite chair and pull out a few books from the backpack hanging on the chair next to you, getting ready to get some studying done.
For a few seconds you imagine Jungkook hanging over your shoulder laughing at the way you write your A-s and R-s, or the way you always sign your homework at the bottom of the page.
And when you open them, there’s no one there. The only sound is from the refrigerator, making refrigerator noises.
You had met Jungkook 3 years ago, when you were at college orientation, senior year of high school. He also wanted to attend Yonsei, just like you.
And when he whispered to you about how bored he was, you couldn’t help but giggle, and then you got yelled at.
It was worth it though, because everyone was jealous of you afterwards,the  Jeon Jungkook had talked to you.
Jungkook was an all-rounder as they called it; great physique, intelligent, charismatic and great at sports.
And god, he had a beautiful face, and such a filthy mouth, and it didn’t go long before you gave in to his seductive ways and slept with him. The morning after, he wasn’t in bed with you, and your heart sank.
Luckily, he was in the kitchen making you breakfast.
It was all bliss from there, showering you with love, gifts and kisses for two years, and you even ended up moving in together.
And now? You barely remember what he sounds like, smells like and is like.
A distant memory, just as distant as him.
Your train of thought was suddenly interrupted as you heard 3 knocks on your door. The exact same way he had always knocked when he had forgotten (or lost) his keys.
And even though you should have let him suffer a little, you rushed to the door to open it, and in front of you, was your biggest nightmare.
It was your love, crying his eyes out, bleeding from one of many cuts on his face, looking nearly dead. He collapsed into your arms, and you could only utter a few words, along the lines of:
“How could you do this to us?”
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As he was laying curled up in a ball on the couch, face plastered up, ice bag on his knee, wrapped up in a blanket, you realized. this was your que to cry.
So, you did. You cried in silence, sitting across the room from him. You weren’t mad at him for coming home late, or getting in another fight, probably the 5th just these past months, you had gotten used to that by now.
There was a whole other reason that made you cry.
He smelled like Victorias Secret Bombshell, you recognized the scent because it used to be your favorite,  however, now you’ve moved onto something less sweet, and more elegant, like Caroline Herrera.
He smelled like someone who wasn’t you, his girlfriend.
He smelled like another girl.
It didn’t hurt as much as you thought it would. Maybe because the Jungkook that had come home to you that morning wasn’t your Jungkook.
Your Jungkook was varsity jackets, star of the american football team (which your school was known for), selfless and humorous, and he would always take care of you.
Your Jungkook was not ungroomed hair, cigarettes and worsening grades. He was not cold and lifeless, and he would never make you cry.
Despite this, you were carding your fingers though his hair, thumb wiping away the blood on his lips while he was sound asleep as you slowly fell asleep next to him.
Maybe it was time to let him go. 
Maybe.
You woke a few hours later from your phone vibrating.
Kim Namjoon (school) [07:01 pm]
Hey Y/N! Have you started working on the statistics assignment?
If you haven’t, would you be interested in meeting at the library tomorrow? You’re really smart and i’m kinda struggling ://
You [07:03 pm]
i finished it yesterday, but if you buy me coffee i’ll come help you hehe
Kim Namjoon (school) [07:04 pm]
You’re the best, I’ll bring you a machiatto!! :D
Maybe it would be nice for you to get out of the house, even though you hate the thought of it, and you would much rather just swim in your own sorrow.
But you did go out the next day, and you helped Namjoon get a decent grade, enough to pass with good margines, he thanked you by taking you out for ramen at a convenial store not too far away.
You thanked him for the ramen with a trip to the museum, and he thanked you for the museum trip with a picnic in the park at night, which led you to crying over Jungkook in his embrace, telling him every single little detail.
He made you realize it was time to let Jungkook go and make room for new people to enter your life.
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You went home that night, and you found Jungkook passed out on the couch, and you could genuienly feel your chest tighten. Soft features which stood out under the moonlight glow, disheveled brown locks which hung down in his eyes.
He was gorgeous, until you saw the credit card on the table next to three bottles of soju and an empty beer can on the floor. And you knew what he had used the credit card for, though you didn’t want to say it out loud.
You cleaned everything up, and you threw the residue of the white powder right in the trash can, and you recycled his bottles and cans before finally, nudging him to wake up.
“Jungkook, wake up.” You spat coldly, or at least you attempted to.
He groaned, rubbing his eyes before opening his eyes, and s huge smile on his face. “Y/N, you’re home!” He reached to kiss you, but you backed away.
“Y/N?” Jungkook questioned, he didn’t quite understand what your intentions were.
“Don’t try anything Jungkook. This was your last chance, and you fucked it up, again.” The room turned ice cold. “I’m getting you help Jungkook, you need help. And then...”
He understood what kind of help you meant, and since he had now sobered up, he agreed, nodding. “And then...?” 
“And then.” Your words were ludged in your throat. “And then I’m leaving you.”
His whole face dropped, smile turned into the frowniest frown you had ever seen, and it was all silent before his lower lip starts trembling, and his eyes start turning glassy.
“It’s alright. Sorry for burdening you.” Was all he could say before tears rushed down his cheeks, and he started shaking.
So you did what you always had done, and you wrapped your arms around him, head resting on your chest as he sobbed.
“Is there anyone else?” he cried out before another wave of sobs hit him.
This exact question made your stomach hurt, and your throat burn. You really had no idea.
Or you did, but you didn’t want to.
You loved Jungkook so much, but you couldn’t be with him in this state. So you did what every rational person would do in this situation.
“Yeah.”
You lied.
“Oh ok. I don’t have the right to be mad do I?”
You shake your head no.
“I love you Y/N. I’m sorry I’m so messed up.”
“It’s ok.” was all he said before he fell asleep in your arms again.
That night you slither your way out of his embrace and you pack your suitcase in the dark, bringing all your essentials, trying to be as quiet as possible so you didn’t wake Jungkook.
Packing enough for two weeks or so, you make the bed and leave your t-shirt “accidentally” in the bathroom, and you make sure all his clothes are folded, and then you sort his pencil case, throwing out old pens and worn out erasers.
You leave a grocery list on the counter, and you tuck him in good under the blankets after you took his jeans and socks off so he could sleep comfortably.
You placed his vitamins and medicine by the refrigerator so he’ll see it when he goes to grab something to eat. 
Puffed up pillows, a pair of sweatpants, t-shirt and underwear is now placed neatly on his bed. Then you walk into the kitchen again, and you see Jungkook still sound asleep, sniffling a little still.
There’s one last thing, and it makes you cry. It makes you sob so loud you cover your mouth and muffle the sound you make. Sinking to the floor, your whole body is in contact with the cold tiles.
Only a year ago you could never imagine yourself even shedding a single tear over something as small as this, but here you were, on the edge of a panic attack.
Two worn out, matching couple mugs still placed by the counter. one if the first things you two had bought together, as well as the necklace hanging around your neck.
Finally, you stopped crying and started cleaning the mugs, lip trembling as you dried them and placed them in the back of the cabinet.
You unhooked your necklace and laid it down on the counter, and the biggest lump formed in your throat.
Actually, there’s a little detail you forget. 
You kiss Jungkook on the forehead and leave a note on the coffee table.
“Dear Jungkook,
If you want to make this up to me (this does not mean a new chance!!) you call the number at the bottom of the page. No matter what happens, I’ll always have room for you in my heart. You even have your own little VIP lobby in there. And - if it’s urgent, call. I still care for you, and I always have. You were the best boyfriend I’ve had, but good things always come to and end, don’t they? Anyways, I’m tired so this letter fucking sucks, but deep down you know how much I love you. Remember to get groceries, shower, get fresh air and study. If I forgot something you can keep it, as long as you call the number and tell them you’re my friend. They’ll help you love. Try and get a part time job too, your student loan and your dad’s money won’t last forever. Good luck Koo. Hwaiting!!
-L/N Y/N <33″
You cringe when you think of the letter’s contents, before you roll out your suitcase out of the front door, whispering a faint “Goodnight Love.” as you close and lock the door behind you.
Standing by the elevator, you cry again. This time, louder, but you still reach for your phone and type out a text to the newly edited contact in your phone.
You [02:13 am]
coming outside now, im a crying mess and im super cold, is your car heated?
sorry for making you wait btw :((
Joonie <3 [02:13 am]
dont worry about the crying part, i’ll hold you. and yeah car is heated, so waiting here wasnt all that bad. you ready for this?
You  [02:14 am]
i have no idea but i cant stay here any longer and i trust you sooo
lets start our new chapter. eh?
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4 months later...
He had been good to you, great even.
You had been on expensive dates, picnics, had heart to heart conversations, and he’d been so understanding.
Today, it was your 2 month anniversary, and he had asked you on a magnificent date, which he had planned every second of.
At the end of the day, you told him how you don’t love him. He said it was alright. Namjoon loved you, so much, yet he understood you needed time.
You went to sleep that day, warm in Namjoon’s embrace, wondering how Jungkook was doing. 
You felt bad, but you missed Jungkook.
You were both with someone new now, and you knew he was in good hands with someone stable enough to care for him.
Before your eyes closed shut, you shed a few quiet tears and hoped that you’d fall in love with Namjoon soon, and deep down you knew you would.
328 notes · View notes
atlafan · 4 years
Text
Sweet Tooth - One Shot
a/n: dentistrry is here!! I only researched a couple of things, so if you’re in the dentistry/medical field please don’t come for me if things are inaccurate, it’s just a fic, you know? This ia really cute, sweet, datey fic, so I hope you enjoy! Feedback and reblogs are super helpful! (not proofread) Consider buying me a coffee if you’re able! 
Warnings: fluff and smut (the word molested is used, nothing bad happens or has happened to the main characters, it’s just mentioned during a conversation)
Pairing: Harry x OC
Words: 18K
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“Dad, I can go by myself.” Abby groans to her father.
“I have to make sure everything gets billed correctly. Your dentist said only two are impacted, so only half is covered my medical and the other half is covered by dental.”
She huffs out a sigh, but nods her head as they enter Tufts Medical Center. Abby was finally getting a consult for her wisdom teeth. Perhaps at the age of twenty she felt a little late to the game for this, but her mouth had only started to hurt a little this past year. She was a little nervous about being knocked out for surgery, but she also just wanted her mouth to feel better. It was the summer before her junior year of college, so now was the perfect time to get it done. Abby and her dad make their way through the building, and get to the floor they need to be on.
“Abigail Simmons.” Her dad says to the receptionist and she nods.
“Someone will be out for her shortly. Did you have her most recent x-rays sent to us?”
“Yes.” Her dad says, and they both go to take a seat.
Abby’s leg was bouncing and she was chewing on her bottom lip. It was just a consult, there was really nothing to be worried about.
“Abigail?” Her eyes widen as she looks over at the person who just said her name. He had a toothy smile and was wearing a set of blue scrubs. She and her father both stand up. “Hi, I’m Harry, you can follow me.” He smiles to the two of them as he leads them to the consult rooms. He gets Abby situated in the dental chair. “Just so you both know, I am a student, but a competent one, which is why one of the other nurses isn’t here, but one of them will come by shortly, and so will the doctor.” He sits down on the stool and wheels over to Abby as he puts his gloves on. “Heard your mouth’s been sore, huh?”
“Y-yeah.”
“She called me at school in tears.” Her dad says and she glares at him.
“College student?” Harry raises an eyebrow and looks back at the computer to review her x-rays. “How old are you?”
“Twenty.” Abby says.
“Your teeth are, like, really straight. Did you have braces?”
“When she was in middle school. She stills wears her retainer.”
Harry and Abby both look at her father and blink. He was really starting to piss her off. She could answer for herself.
“Well, you’ve got a very good girl here, don’t you, Mr. Simmons? Listen, uh, this is going to take a few minutes. I need to look at all of her teeth and confirm the ones that are impacted and if the other two have room or not. There’s another waiting area right over there. I’ll call you back over once the doctor’s here. Would that be alright?”
“It’s just…Abby’s really nervous-“
“Dad, please, I’m fine.”
“Alright.” Her dad sighs. “I’ll be right over there.”
“Bit of a helicopter you have there.” Harry smirks at her.
“Thank you for getting rid of him. I bring myself to the doctor all the time, but for whatever reason he was adamant about coming to this.”
“It’s major surgery I don’t blame him.” Harry grabs a bib to put around Abby. “So, you go by Abby?”
“Mhm.” She blushes as he clips the bib in place and adjusts her hair.
“Is it true, are you nervous?”
“A little…mostly about the surgery, not so much about the rest. I’m not one of those people that’s afraid of the dentist.”
“No worries, love, you’ll be in good hands with us.” He smiles. “I’m gonna put the chair back now, alright?”
“Okay.”
The chair slowly goes back, and he situates a pair of sunglasses onto her before fixing the light over her eyes.
“Could you open up for me as much as you can? I’ll try to be as gentle as possible since I know you’re experiencing a lot of discomfort.”
She nods and opens up wide. She feels his pinkies enter her mouth and feel around her gums. She winces a few times when he brushes up against the back of her mouth. She hears him whisper sorry a few times. Abby tries to focus on anything else. She focuses on how green his eyes are, and how seemingly perfect his skin is. Her mind wanders to how people get skin like that. What’s his routine? How could she get skin as smooth? Does he see a dermatologist regularly?
“Okay, Abby, I’m gonna out the chair back upright, and go grab your dad and the doctor. Hope that didn’t hurt too much.”
“It was fine, thank you.”
Abby’s dad, two nurses, Harry, and the doctor all come over to her to discuss her teeth. She definitely needed all four removed. They settle on a date for her to come back and have the procedure done, and Harry gives her the rundown on how to prep for the surgery.
“We’ll see you in a couple of weeks, Abby.” Harry smiles.
“You’ll be here?”
“You bet.”
Even though she was nervous as fuck to go under, she was almost excited to see the handsome dental student again. At least it was something to look forward to.
//
Abby had an early morning surgery, and she had to stop eating the night before. So she was exhausted and starving, not to mention she was a ball of nerves. Her dad drove her in for the appointment, and assured her he’d be there afterwards.
“Abby?” Harry comes out all scrubbed up and ready to go. She stands up and waves back to her dad before going with him. He brings her over to a consult chair and types on the computer. “Alright, whatcha have for breakfast?”
“N-nothing, I haven’t eaten since dinner last night.”
“Good girl.” He says without looking at her. “And what about a midnight snack?”
“Harry, I haven’t eaten since dinner last night.”
“You remembered my name?” He asks as he turns to her, and she blushes.
“Sort of hard to forget the British guy that told my dad to go sit somewhere else.” She smirks, and it makes him laugh. “Will you be in the operating room?”
“Yup, I’ll be there the whole time. I’m the hand holder.”
“The hand holder?”
“Mhm, while they’re helping you get to sleep I’ll be holding your hand, making sure you’re alright. I also get to put the IV in your arm.”
“Lucky you.” She deadpans and it makes him laugh again.
“What are you in school for?”
“Psychology. I’d like to be the type of doctor that doesn’t have to deal with all this.” She gestures around the room.
“Helping people on a whole other level, I see.” He nods.
The doctor comes over, and she must have gotten asked about four more times if she had eaten breakfast. She gets settled in the chair in the new room where she’d be operated on. She watches as Harry gets the IV in her arm, and then he holds her hand, just like he said he was. He was wearing a mask now, but she could tell he was smiling.
“Don’t worry, Abby, the next time you wake up these nasty teeth will be gone.”
She nods at him and squeezes his hand as they get the oxygen hooked up to her nose. His thumb rubs the back of her hand as a nurse puts the mask over her mouth, and her eyes slowly start to droop. The last image she has is Harry’s hand in hers.
When Abby wakes up, her eyes immediately well up with tears as she looks around the room. She sees her dad sitting in a chair reading a magazine, and she sees the IV still hooked up to her arm. She makes a whining noise and her dad looks over at her.
“Hey, you’re awake.” He smiles. “Everything went really well, honey. You did great.”
After about ten minutes a nurse comes in and takes the IV out. In her daze she tried looking for Harry, but she couldn’t find him. She was so delirious she could barely walk, and her dad had to help her to the car. She just wanted to say thank you to Harry for holding her hand, but she never got the chance.
//
Several years later, Abby had finished her master’s degree in counseling, and just finished up her licensure program. She already had a few different job opportunities lined up. The one she wanted most was at a local university at a counseling center. Being a student in today’s age was tough, and Abby wanted to be someone they could open up to. She had done extremely well in her postgraduate internship, so she had impeccable recommendations. She just needed to narrow things down to what school she wanted to work for, and that ultimately came down to benefits. She ended up going with UMASS Boston. It was a school a lot of her friends attended, so she sort of knew the campus, it was easy enough to get to by train, and the benefits were great.
After getting the first semester under her belt, Abby was feeling confident in what she was doing. She was truly helping students. She’d even be able to go for her PhD for free after she had six months under her belt. With winter break underway, Abby was getting caught up on some self-care, which meant going in for her annual cleaning.
“Hello, this is MidCity General Denstistry, may I please speak with Abigail Simmons?”
“This is she.”
“Hi, Abigail, this is a call to remind you of your appointment this week.”
“Right, Wednesday at 3PM?”
“Correct, and I have to inform you that your usual dentist, Dr. Morgan, has recently retired.”
“Oh…I mean good for her, I just liked her a lot.” Abby chuckles.
“Don’t worry, our new doctor, Dr. Styles, is amazing and everyone’s really like him so far. He’s taking over all of Dr. Morgan’s patients.”
“Okay, that should be fine. See you Wednesday!” Abby hangs up the phone and puts an extra reminder on her phone so she wouldn’t forget.
On Wednesday, she checked in and was brought into the back by a nurse, Marie. She was the dental assistant that would be doing her cleaning, nothing out of the ordinary. Although, Abby was starting to get aggravated because Marie kept sticking the pick into the same tooth in the back of her mouth. She hears Marie sigh.
“Abby, it seems like you may have a cavity. Dr. Styles will be able to confirm it. Let me polish you up, and then I’ll go get him.”
Before Abby has a chance to respond, Marie was already polishing her teeth. She was left to lay back in the chair while Marie went to get Dr. Styles.
“Hello, Miss Simmons.” Abby’s eyes widen when she hears his voice. He sits on a stool and wheels over next to her. “I’m Dr. Styles, nice to meet you.” He extends his hand to her and she takes it. “Mind if I take a quick peak at everything else before I inspect this possible cavity?”
“N-no, go ahead.”
“Thank you, open wide for me.”
She does so, and he sticks his gloved fingers into her mouth, feeling around her gums, and making sure everything’s alright. Next he grabs the tools and does a quick inspection of her overall mouth before poking at the tooth that Marie said was the problem. Abby notices how he hum along to the music playing on the radio. It was almost soothing.
“Okay, I’m gonna hit the button so you can sit up.” He says to her. Marie moves the light, and Abby takes the sunglasses she was given off. Her eyes widen again when she gets a good look at him.
Abby had come into contact with a lot of people in her life since the time she was twenty. It would be odd to remember someone that helped with her oral surgery, but too much was adding up. A man with a British accent, the same green eyes, and he was in the dental profession. She was finally going to get a chance to thank him.
“You have a cavity.” He sighs.
“I’ve never had one in my life.” She shakes her head.
“Happens to the best of us.” Dr. Styles chuckles. “Are you eating a lot of sweets?”
“Um, well, I’m a counselor at UMASS Boston, and I tend to suck on jolly ranchers when I’m meeting with students. Helps remind me to just sit and listen and not interrupt.”
“Ah, that’s a pretty good trick. Maybe try sugar free gum?”
“No, gum gives me a headache.” She shakes her head. “I prefer to suck than to chew.”
“Right.” He swallows. “Maybe try sucking on some mints then?”
“Sure, I can try that.” She smiles at him.
“Good girl.” He smiles back at her. That just sealed the deal it was definitely him. “Marie here will help you set up an appointment so I can take care of this for you.”
“You’ll be doing the procedure?”
“Mhm, you’re stuck with me now…unless you want to switch to another doctor, which I hope you don’t. Hope you’re not missing Dr. Morgan too much.”
“Not as much as I thought, that’s for sure. Um…this may be a weird question, but did you happen to be a student at Tufts Medical Center?”
“I was! It’s where I went after I got my bachelor’s. I can perform oral surgery, but I much prefer doing stuff like this. Can fill a cavity in my sleep. How did you know I went there?”
“I…this is going to sound so weird, but, like, six years ago you…held my hand when I got my wisdom teeth out.” Harry’s eyes widen at that. “Normally I wouldn’t remember someone so well, but…it’s not every day I have a British doctor.”
“Oh, wow, you remember me doing that?”
“Yeah, and we left before I ever got a chance to say thank you for keeping me so calm. So…thanks.” She blushes.
“I wish…I wish I remembered that. They often had me as the hand holder. How nice for our paths to cross again, huh? Promise to be just as good a dentist as I was at holding your hand.”
“That’s all I could hope for.” She smirks, and it makes him chuckle. “Right, well, Marie, please help Miss Simmons set up her appointment with me so we can get this cavity filled.”
“Sure thing, Dr. Styles.” Marie says as she makes a few clicks on the computer.
Just like that he was gone. He had grown into quite the handsome man since she last saw him. Not that he wasn’t before, but he looked more adult now. She wondered how much older he was than her. More importantly, she wondered if he was single.
//
It was about a week later when Abby came in to have her cavity taken care of. Marie was the dental assistant again which brought Abby some comfort. Marie gets her prepped in the chair as they wait for Harry to come into the private room.
“Alright, good morning, Miss Simmons.” He says brightly.
“You can just call me Abby if you want…” She says shyly.
“Okay, Abby, it is. Let’s fill this cavity, yeah?” He sits on the stool and wheels over to her. “Gotta give you a spot of nova cane, but before I do that we have to numb the area a bit, so this little thing that looks like a lollypop is gonna go in.” Abby nods. “Open up for me.” She does so. “Good girl, thank you.” He places the numbing stick inside her mouth and she scrunches her face. “I know, it doesn’t taste very good, sorry.” He stands back up. “I’ll be back in about five minutes.”  
True to his word, Harry comes back five minutes later, and takes the numbing stick out of Abby’s mouth. Next he has her open up so he can administer the nova cane. He tells her she might feel a slight pinch, and she accidentally grabs onto his thigh.
“S-sorry.” Abby says as she takes her hand off him. “I may not be afraid of the dentist, but I really don’t like needles.”
Harry and Marie share a glance, and then Harry looks at Abby.
“Marie, would you mind handling the nova cane so I can hold Abby’s hand?”
“Sure thing, Dr. Styles.”
Harry hands the needle to Marie, and then Harry grabs onto Abby’s hand. He smiles softly at her, and she’s able to focus on him and not the needle going into her gums. Marie says it’s all set, so Harry gets back into position with the drill.
“If it hurts, just let me know and we can numb you a bit more.” Harry says to her. “It’ll be over before you know it.”
Abby pinches her eyes closed the second the drill comes into contact with her tooth. Thank god Harry was wearing a mask because he couldn’t help but smile at how cute she looked. Luckily, Abby didn’t suffer too much. The procedure didn’t take too long, and she was sitting upright before she knew it.
“You did great.” Harry smiles at her. “So, that side of your mouth will be numb for a bit. Give it a few hours before you eat anything, avoid hot foods.” Abby just nods her head along, too embarrassed to speak because she knew she would sound stupid. “Have you made your appointment for your next cleaning?” She nods again. “Great, Marie, I’m just gonna go over another few things with Abby, feel free to go on your break.”
“Oh, alright. See you in six months, Abby.” Marie smiles, and leaves the room as Abby waves to her.
“I actually already went over everything with you. I…uh…just wanted her to step out.” Abby’s eyes widen at that. “I was actually wondering, um, if you’d like to go out for coffee sometime…you know, when you can have hot liquids again.” He blushes and so does she. She nods yes at him quickly. “You do? Great, um, can I have your number then?” Abby frantically reaches for the phone in her pocket, unlocks it, and then hands it to Harry so he can add his contact. “I’ll call you in a couple of days so we can set something up, yeah?”
She smiles and nods as she takes her phone back. Her heart was fluttering. She felt like she was in a dream or something. Coffee couldn’t come soon enough.
//
Harry called Abby a couple of days later, just like he said he would, and they agreed upon what coffee shop they should meet up at on Saturday. Her mouth was feeling much better, and she was really excited to see him. She was still in shock that he asked her out in the first place. She thought she’d have to wait another six months to see him again.
He got to the coffee shop first, and decided to wait outside for her. He smiles when he sees her and they step inside.
“It’s on me.” He says. “Get whatever you like.”
“Oh! That’s so nice of you.” Abby blushes. “Thanks.” They each order and grab a table to sit at. It was too cold outside to go for a walk.
“I just want to preface by saying I’ve never asked out a patient before.” Harry says to her.
“So…why ask me out then?”
“I just found it really endearing that you remembered me, and all you wanted to do was say thank you to me for doing something so simple.”
“Harry, I had just turned twenty, I was practically still a kid. I had never gone under or had a surgery before, I was petrified. My dad was just as nervous, you were the only thing that calmed me down.”
“So, that would make you roughly twenty-six now?”
“Yes it would.” She smiles as she takes a sip of her coffee. “How old are you?”
“I’ll be thirty-two next month.” It was an age difference both of them might have been against those years ago, but not now. They were both well into adulthood, had their careers, and had some life experience under their belts. “It’s killing me that I don’t remember you.”
“It’s really okay. You’ve probably seen so many patients. I’m sure years down the line I won’t remember every student I’ve met with.”
“Right, you said you’re a counselor at…?”
“UMASS Boston.”
“And how do you like doing that?”
“I love it, honestly. I feel so bad for these kids, they have so much on their plates, under all this pressure. It’s really brave of them to come ask for help, so I like giving them a safe space. Some meetings are more serious than others, so it’s never boring. I feel like I’m doing something worthwhile.”
“That’s amazing. Feel like I do better talking to people in small spurts, that’s what’s so great about being a dentist. People can’t strike up small talk when you’ve got your fingers in their mouth.” He laughs and so does Abby.
“How long have you been at MidCity for?”
“Like…six months, I think. I like it a lot, everyone’s really nice. Marie’s my favorite assistant, though, sometimes her kids come in and they’re really cute, and her wife bakes the best brownies.”
“She’s usually the one to do my cleanings, I like her a lot too.”
“Can I ask why you chose jolly ranchers to suck on? I mean, how many students are you meeting with? You must go through a ton.”
“I do.” She blushes in embarrassment. “I got them when they were on sale after Halloween…I’m definitely going to try the mints like you said.”
“Good, I’m glad.” He smiles as he takes a bite of his bagel.
“So, how does a doctor such as yourself not already have a girlfriend?”
“Getting right to it, huh?” He smirks and she nods. “Medical school takes up a lot of time, and then when I first started as an intern, I was constantly overworked. I was doing surgeries left and right, I was too exhausted to try and make anything serious work. Then I decided I’d rather be working at a practice. I still do a lot of teeth pulling, but not as much as I was. And now that things have slowed down a bit, I just haven’t met someone I’ve wanted to be serious with.” He shrugs. “What about you?”
“Same thing, sort of.” She giggles. “Grad school was a lot, and then interning was a lot. Now I’m just really settling into my job. I survived the first semester, now I feel like a pro.”
“That’s a good feeling to have. Is your commute long?”
“Not really, I just take the green line to the red and I’m there. Obviously the trains can be unpredictable, but it beats having to pay for a car and car insurance. What about you? Are you in the city, or out in the suburbs.”
“Oh, I’m in the city. I drive to work, though, I’ve got my own parking spot at the back of the building.”
“Well, we can’t all be so special.” She smirks.
“No, I suppose not.” He smirks back at her. “How’s your tooth feel, by the way?”
“Oh, it’s fine, thanks. You’re really good at your job. It was nice of you to hold my hand when Marie did the nova cane.”
“I felt so bad that you were scared.” He reaches across the table and places his hand over hers. “When you grabbed onto me I knew I had to do something.”
“God that was embarrassing. I would have felt so violated if someone did that to me.”
“It’s not like you grabbed my dick, Abby, it’s alright.” He gives her hand a squeeze.
“Right.” She lets out a nervous laugh. “So, do you work a standard Monday through Friday at MidCity, or how does all of that work?”
“Yup, pretty much.” He takes his hand away from hers. “I mean obviously if there’s an emergency we have to cancel appointments, but for the most part we leave spots open for surgeries so people are able to book those easy enough. I usually pop by the cleanings in between cavity fillings and other stuff.”
“What made you want to become a dentist?”
“Well, I knew I wanted to work in the medical field, but selfishly I didn’t want the long hours at hospitals. I don’t have to be on call, like, I don’t have to worry about emergencies in the middle of the night. Not often, anyways.”
“I feel like I would get grossed out looking at teeth all day.” Abby chuckles.
“It’s not as bad as you think. I try to separate the teeth from the person. Like, I was able to give all new teeth to this recovering meth addict. She had this incredible story, and I knew I had to help. She had been sober for five years, but no one would hire her because of her teeth. Now she’s working a corporate job doing great.”
“Oh, wow, that’s amazing.”
“You must have some great stories with your students.”
“Yeah, I’ve really bonded with a few of them. Sometimes they just need someone on their side, you know? A lot of them are first in their family to go to school, so they’re doing a lot on their own.”
“That’s a lot of pressure.”
“You have no idea.”
“Well, it’s good they have a nice person like you to help them.” Harry smiles warmly at her and she smiles back. “Would you, um, would you be interested in going out for dinner some time?”
“I…yeah, I’d love to.” She blinks a couple of times. “I’m free most nights right now because we’re on winter break.”
“You don’t have to go into your office at all?”
“I just answer emails from home.” Abby shrugs.
“Sweet deal.” Harry grins. “So, how would Thursday night work for you?”
“Thursday works great.” She smiles.
They both throw out all of their trash and step out of the coffee shop. They share a gentle hug, and go their separate ways. Harry said he’d call in a couple of days to let her know where he’d be taking her, and she was beyond excited.
//
Friday night, Harry picked Abby up in front of her building. When he saw her, he got out of the car to open the door for her and she giggled.
“That’s a nice coat.” He says to her.
“Thanks, I got it on sale at L.L. Bean back in August. Keeps me nice and warm.”
“Oh, I love shopping there! Once in a while I’ll take the drive up to New Hampshire to go to the actual store to get the really good stuff. The boots I got from there for the winter will last a life time.”
“Yeah, it’s just good quality stuff. I usually get a decent coupon in the mail or online.” She chews her bottom lip. Clearly Harry had a little more money than she did. “Where are we eating?”
“You’ll love it, it’s this nice Italian place at the North End. I remember you said Italian was something you liked when we spoke on the phone.”
Abby smiles at him and he looks at her briefly to smile back. He finds a place to park, somehow, and they walk towards the restaurants. She hadn’t been to the North End in a while since most of the places were expensive. Harry puts his hand on the small of her back as they walk in, and he tells the hostess he has a reservation. She leads them over to a table for two and he pulls out the chair for her.
“So, how’s your week been?” Abby asks him.
“Pretty good, fit this one person with a new tooth, did a couple of crowns. Same old, same old.” He shrugs. “How about you?”
“Good, I did some virtual sessions with some students who are having shitty winter breaks. I went into the office for a team retreat, and then I updated some spread sheets.” She chuckles.
“That’s nice of you to do virtual appointments.”
“It’s all part of the job.”
“Good evening, folks.” A waiter comes over with water and a basket of rolls. “I’m Parker, can I start you off with any drinks or appetizers?”
“Abby, would you care to get a bottle of white for the table?” Harry asks her.
“Oh, sure, that’s be great. Would Pinot Grigio be alright?”
“It’s perfect. A bottle of Piniot Grigio, please.” He looks down at the menu and furrows his brows at the appetizers. “Calamari?” He asks her and she nods. “Calamari, Parker.”
“Sounds great, I’ll be back in a moment with the wine and to take your dinner orders.”
“The calamari here is excellent, it’s lightly fried in peanut oil so it doesn’t feel heavy.”
“What do you recommend for an entrée?”
“Everything’s good. What are you in the mood for?”
Abby looks down at the menu and her eyebrows raise at the prices.
“Maybe just one of these pasta dishes.”
“Don’t do that.”
“What?”
“Don’t get the cheapest thing on the menu. Get whatever you like, it’s my treat.”
“Harry, this is gonna be really expensive.”
“I wouldn’t have brought you here if I couldn’t afford it, please don’t worry about it.”
“O-okay, then…maybe the steak tips with the pan seared peppers.”
“If that’s what you want then you should have it.” Harry smiles. Parker comes over with the bottle of wine, and pours the first two glasses for them. “I’m really glad we could do this tonight.” He grins. “I…found something when I was going through some old things the other day.”
“Oh?” She raises an eyebrow as she sips on her drink.
“It was killing me that I couldn’t remember you, but then it hit me.” He reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a card. “I’ve never been so thankful to be a packrat in my life.” He opens it and smiles. “Dear Harry, I never got a chance to say thank you when you held my hand before my surgery. I figured I’d drop this off when I came in to have my stitches removed. I hope this finds its way to you. You’re going to be a great doctor someday. Sincerely, Abby Simmons.” He smiles at her as he places the card back in his back pocket.
“You…you kept that?”
“It wasn’t often I got cards like that, so I kept it, and once in a while when I needed a pick me up I’d read it. As soon as I re-read it the other day I completely remembered you. I even remembered telling your dad to go sit in the other waiting room.”
“Oh my god.” Abby chuckles. “That was the greatest thing I had ever seen. Think that solidified the crush I had on you.”
“Telling your dad to basically leave you alone?”
“Yeah.” She smirks. “Super hot to see you be so sure of yourself and confident. Plus, he was really pissing me off, talking over me and answering for me.”
“Wow, so I guess I’m the one that away, huh?” He smirks.
“You certainly were. Although, I hadn’t thought about you in quite some time. It’s crazy that you ended up becoming my dentist.”
“Very crazy.” Parker comes over with the calamari and tells the two he’s going to put their orders in now. Harry watches as she sticks her fork into a piece and takes a bite. “You’re really cute, you know that?”
“I’ll take your word for it.” She smiles. “This is really good.”
“I’m glad you like it.”
The rest of the date goes really well. Abby and Harry continued to joke around and flirt. It wasn’t until the check came that she felt a little uncomfortable.
“How much is it?” She asks him nervously.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” He smirks and slides his card into the slot, letting Parker take it. “Would you like to walk around for a bit, maybe get some dessert by the water?”
“That sounds great, but only if I can pay for dessert.”
“Deal.” He smiles.
Harry holds Abby’s hand as they walk through the little park by the water. Even though it was cold out, it was still a beautiful night. They duck into a gelato place for a little dessert. They decide to split something, which ends up being insanely romantic when Harry lifts his spoon to her lips. She makes a show of it as she takes a bite, licking her lips after and everything. He holds her hand during the drive, and lets her pick the radio station. He gets out and walks her up to the door once they get to her building.
“I had a lot of fun with you tonight.” She says to him.
“Me too.” He steps closer to her. “Do you see a third date in our future?”
“Definitely.” She nods. “Do you like bowling?”
“Love bowling. Are you, um, free Saturday night?”
“I can be.” She smiles. “Pick me up around seven?”
“It’s a date.” He smiles. The two stand there awkwardly for a moment, unsure if they should kiss or not, so instead Harry opens his arms for hug, and she wraps her arms around his neck. She kisses his cheek, and then he kisses hers. “I’ll see you Saturday, Abby.”
“See you Saturday, Harry.”
//
Harry was on cloud nine the next day at work. He couldn’t stop thinking about Abby, her smile, her laugh, the little beauty mark she has under right eye. He thought she was gorgeous, charming, and kind. Normally he’d never get involved with a patient, but he couldn’t help it with her. He thought it was so sweet that she remembered him after all this time, and he felt so relieved that he remembered her.
“You’ve had this dreamy look on your face all week, what’s with you?” Marie asks Harry while they’re eating lunch.
“I…sort of met someone, and we’ve been out a couple times…she’s great.”
“That’s great! Anyone I know?”
“Um…well, you know Abigail Simmons…”
“Of course I know Abby! Oh my god, is that why you asked me to step out of the room when you filled her cavity?!”
“I didn’t wanna ask her out in front of you.”
“Harry, since when do you date patients?” She whispers.
“Normally I wouldn’t, but it turns out I met her a long time ago. When I was a student at Tufts I assisted in removing her wisdom teeth.”
“Oh, wow, that’s incredible.” Marie blinks. “When are you seeing her again?”
“Tomorrow night. We’re going bowling, how fun is that?”
“Should be really fun.” Marie grins. “Look at you, putting yourself out there. Now Leigh and I can stop trying to set you up.”
“I’m excited about her. She’s got such a cool job too. I can’t wait to keep getting to know her.”
//
Since they were going bowling, they could easily just take the train, so Harry takes a cab to Abby’s building Saturday evening. He was wearing a nice pair of jeans and a sweater under his jacket. She comes down the stairs in her long coat, and a Patriots hat on top of her head.
“Hey.” He smiles at her, taking her in for a hug. “How are you?”
“Good.” She smiles up at him. “How are you?”
“Good, great, actually.” He takes her hand and they walk towards the nearest t-stop. They both swipe their Charlie Cards and hop onto the next train.  
“I hope you’re okay with candle pins…I’m not good with the big balls.” Abby says to him as they hang onto the same pole of the crowded train.
“I love candle pinning.” He chuckles. “No worries.”
They get to the bowling alley, are given a lane, and get their shoes. Abby takes her hat off and fixes her hair, and then unzips her jacket. She had a pair of jeans on with a red turtleneck. Abby was a short, curvy thing, and Harry absolutely loved it. When Abby first met Harry back when she was twenty, she was a tiny size two, but now she was a comfortable size eight and was fully embracing it. She was healthy, and that was all that mattered.
“Do you want anything to drink? I could get us a pitcher of beer.” Harry says to her as they settle into their lane. “I could get us some pizza too.”
“That sounds great, thanks.” She smiles as she slips her shoes on.
“Be back in a tick.” Harry goes over to the snack bar and gets two slices of pizza and a pitcher of beer. “Here we are.” Harry fills two of the plastic cups up with the beer, and hands one to Abby. “Shall we?”
“Mhm, I already set up the score sheets.” She shows him the large sheet of paper. “Not that I care that much about the score…it’s just fun to keep track.”
Abby bowls first, knocking most of the pins down, and then gets the rest on her second throw. Harry couldn’t help but smile as he watched her to do a little jog and hop as she threw the ball down the lane. He goes up next and immediately gets a strike.
“Woohoo! Go, Harry!” Abby says as she takes a sip of her beer. “I don’t think I’ve ever gotten a strike before.”
“I could show you how if you want.”
“Isn’t it just luck?”
“Nope, it’s all physics.”
“And…you’re good with physics?”
“Had to take it during pre-med, I even tutored for it. Come on, I’ll show you.” Abby gets up and grabs one of the balls. Harry goes behind her, and puts his hand on one of her shoulders, moving her hair so he can speak closer to her ear. “Okay, so what you’re gonna want to do is walk a little closer to the line, swing the ball back, and let it fly.”
Abby turns slightly to look up at him. Her cheeks were flushed. She nods at him, and does exactly what he said to do, and she gets the strike.
“Oh my god!” She squeals and throws her arms around him. “I can’t believe that worked! You’re amazing!” She kisses his cheek.
“You did great! Nice to know you’re good at following directions.” He winks at her and grabs his next ball.
After three rounds of bowling, and two pitchers of beer, they both head out. They take the train back to the stop nearest to Abby’s apartment, and Harry walks her home.
“I had so much fun tonight, Harry.”
“Me too, I’m glad you suggested bowling.” They both stop in front of her steps. “Can I see you again next weekend?”
“I’d like that.”
“Maybe if it’s not too cold we could go ice skating at Frog Pond.”
“Oh, I’d love to do that! I have my own skates and everything.”
“Perfect.” He smiles and steps closer to her. She looks up at him with her big brown eyes. He didn’t think brown eyes as beautiful as hers existed. “Abby, can I kiss you?” He asks softly.
“Yes.” She nods and smiles up at him.
He cups her cheek and leans down to her. His lips press to hers, and he uses is other hand to cup her other cheek. It’s soft and gentle at first, it grows a little needier as she presses her body to his, but she stops him from walking up the stairs. She pulls away first and blushes.
“Um, well, goodnight.” She says to him.
“Yeah, goodnight.” He rubs the back of his neck. He was sorting of hoping she’d invite him up. It was the third date, after all. Maybe she was a fifth date kind of girl, which he had to respect. “I’ll call you at some point during the week. I’ve got a few different surgeries, though, so if you don’t hear from me a lot that’s why.”
“No worries.” She shrugs. “I’m getting ready for the students to return, and I have some meetings to go to, some seminars, so I’ll be busy myself. Wanna just plan for next Saturday?”
“Sounds good to me.” He leans again to kiss her again, and she happily kisses him back.
“Okay, goodnight for real.” She giggles and walks up her steps. She waves goodbye as she goes into her building and he sighs.
Abby sighs happily as she gets into her apartment and squeals. She immediately texts her best friend everything about her date with Harry. She was so excited about him, and couldn’t believe he was actually interested in her.
//
They texted here and there during the week. Abby got a little brave and sent him a mirror selfie of her dressed up for work, and he sent one back of himself in his scrubs ready to go in for surgery. Her jaw nearly dropped when she saw him. She had seen him in scrubs before, but it was ages ago. He filled them out so differently now. Plus, the thought of him being a doctor just did things to her insides that she couldn’t even describe. He thought she looked gorgeous in her pin striped slacks and blouse. He couldn’t but think about how lucky each student was that got to sit and talk with her.
Harry was exhausted by the end of the week. He must have extracted over a dozen teeth, filled a stupid amount of cavities, and put on ten different crowns. He couldn’t wait to see Abby Saturday. He asked her to go to the pond a little earlier in the evening so they could get dinner afterwards. The decided to just meet at the pond. She was easy enough to spot now that he knew what her long coat and Patriots hat looked like.
“Harry.” She smiles when she turns to see him. They hug and share a quick peck on the lips. “Did you catch up on some sleep?”
“I did.” He sighs as they find a bench to sit down on to put on their skates. “Been looking forward to seeing you all week. How’d your seminar go?”
“Oh, it was great! It ended up being more of a training, I have a new certification too.”
“That’s amazing, good for you. I’m constantly going to lectures and stuff to stay up to date. I’ve published a couple of things too to some medical journals.”
“That’s so cool! Once I’ve been at UMASS for six months I can start taking classes for free. I’m gonns go for my doctorate, so hopefully I can start publishing some work too.” They both stand up and make their way into the rink. Abby puts her hand out for Harry’s and he takes it as they start to glide on the ice.
“That’s great that they have a program like that for you.”
“I know! I was super happy when I saw that in the benefits package.”
They skate around the rink a few times, enjoying the music that was playing. Harry guides them over to the side for a little break. He presses her against it, his hands going onto the railing, caging her in. She looks up at him, and he leans in to kiss her. She tugs on his coat to pull him closer, and the kiss deepens slightly. Abby really liked kissing Harry. He always tasted like mint, probably because he was constantly chewing gum, and his lips were insanely soft. She starts smiling and so does he, and he presses his forehead to hers.
“Do you feel like going to eat now?” He says to her.
“Yeah.” She nods.
They end up going to a Mexican restaurant not too far from the pond. They each get margaritas and laugh a lot. Harry talks about what it’s like to extract teeth during a surgery, and Abby asks if people ever want to see their teeth afterwards. He asks Abby how she copes when she has to deal with a heavier situation at work, and she says her little Shih Tzu, Marvin, helps make her day a lot better.
“That’s nice your apartment allows pets.” He says to her.
“Yeah, he’s only, like, nine pounds, if that. He’s so cute, do you wanna see a picture?”
“Of course!” Abby pulls out her phone to show Harry a few pictures of Marvin, and even a selfie she took with him. “He’s so cute, and so are you.”
“Thanks.” She giggles.
“He looks like a little stuffed animal.”
“He really does.”
“Why a Shih Tzu?”
“They’re really smart. They’re tough to train because they’re so stubborn, but once they get a little older they start to listen, and they’re pretty self-sufficient alone during the day. Although, sometimes I sneak him into the office.”
“How old is he?”
“About two. Do you have any pets?”
“Nah, I’m not home enough to take care of anything else. But I love dogs, I think they’re great.”
“Well, maybe at some point you can meet little Marv.”
“I’d like that.”
They square up the tab and Harry walks Abby home once again. They kiss for a while outside her front door. He desperately wanted to feel her tongue on his, but she wouldn’t open her mouth up. His hands squeeze at her hips, and she tugs on his jacket like she had done earlier.
“Well, I better get up inside.” She says against his lips and he hums his response as he continues to kiss her. She giggles into him. “Harry.” She smiles and steps back from him.
“Sorry, I just really like kissing you.”
“I like kissing you too.”
“When can I see you again?”
She takes her phone out to check her calendar.
“Are you free on Friday?” She asks as she furrows her brows at her screen.
“I think so. We could go to dinner, if you like. There’s this really great Chinese place in China Town that I love going to if you’re interested.”
“That sounds great, Harry.” She smiles. “I’m looking forward to it.”
“Maybe…um, maybe we could meet up for lunch, or something at some point during the week.”
“Do you have time for something like that?”
“I’m sure I do. I can look at my calendar and let you know which day works best.”
“Okay.” She nods. “I’d love to meet up for lunch.”
“Great.” He leans in to kiss her again. “Hope you and Marvin have a good night.”
“Oh, we will. He’s probably antsy for me to get up there and give him all the cuddles I can. Text me when you know which day works for lunch.” She smiles and heads inside.
Harry couldn’t believe a little dog was going to be getting all of her cuddles tonight and not him. She was slowly killing him. He respected that she might want to take things slow, but to still not invite him up? He sighs and orders an uber back to his condo, hoping he’ll be able to fall asleep easily, and not stay up thinking about the girl who was slowly creeping her way into his heart.
//
Abby was able to meet up with Harry on Tuesday, but only for a quick walk, which she thought would be a great opportunity for Harry to meet Marvin. She gets his sweater and harness on, leashes him up, and out the door she goes. Harry was standing outside her building, in his scrubs, and a jacket, with two hot chocolates.
“Thank you.” She smiles and takes the warm drink from him. “Harry, this is Marvin.”
“Aw.” He pouts, and squats down to put his hand in front of Marvin’s nose before he pets him. “Nice to meet you little guy.” He looks up at Abby. “He’s even cuter in person.”
“Right? I’m really excited we could get out for a little bit today. He loves when I can take him for a good walk.” Harry stands back up straight and they all start walking. “Were you in surgery today?”
“Yeah, early this morning, and I’ve got another one later this afternoon. Didn’t make much sense for me to put my other clothes back on.”
“You look cute in your scrubs.” Abby says, a blush creeping onto her cheeks.
Harry nudges her and he looks down at Marvin.
“He’s pretty quiet, huh?”
“He was yappy when I first got him, but he’s calmed down a lot. First summer I had him I spent a lot of time training him. Pretty much taught him not to bark unless someone’s trying to break in.”
“You must be good with discipline then.”
“I try to be. Although, I’m more of a fan of positive reinforcement.” They pull to the side as Marvin takes a tinkle near a fire hydrant. “Good boy, Marvin.” She says and gives him a kibble as a treat. “Kibbles are great treats. Can’t get fat off what he normally eats.”
“That’s really smart. Have you, uh, been laying off the jolly ranchers?”
“Oh, I’m sorry, Dr. Styles, I didn’t realize we were in your office.”
“Abby…”
“I’ve been trying to, but I have a horrible sweet tooth. They’re the only candy I really eat. What’s the harm?”
“Your teeth rotting out?”
“Okay, good point. I mean, I haven’t had nearly as many since I’m not really meeting with students right now, and I’ve already gone out and bought a ton of mints for the next semester.”
“Good girl, that’s what I like to hear.”
“What do you say to your male patients?”
“Pardon?”
“It’s just…you say good girl a lot…do you do that with all your female patients, and if so…what do you say to your male patients? Also, I’m an adult woman. Do you say good girl to all adult women?”
“Abby.” Harry chuckles. “I think I’ve only ever said that to you.”
“Oh, fuck off, I bet you say it all the time.”
“I really don’t.”
“Then why me?”
“You’re cute, and I tend to be a flirt sometimes.”
“You consider calling me a good girl flirting?” She stops short and he turns to look at her.
“I do.” He nods, a smirk growing on his lips. “Do you want me to stop saying it to you?”
“N-no.”
“Alright then.” He grins and they continue walking until they get to Marvin’s turn around spot, and make their way back to Abby’s building. “I’m glad we got to meet up for a bit. Still on for Friday night?”
“Definitely.” She goes up on her tip toes to kiss him goodbye and inside she goes. Harry left her with butterflies in her stomach.
//
Harry was really hoping tonight would be the night something more happens between him and Abby. He just wanted to feel her body on his. He drives to her place around seven Friday night, and he waits outside the car for her.
“Hello, beautiful.” He says to her as she steps outside.
“Hey.” She smiles and kisses him. He opens the door for her and he jogs around the other side to get back in. He takes her hand in his as she drives towards China Town. “How was your day?”
“Good, really busy, but good. I tend to get a lot of kids on Fridays since it’s an easy day for them to miss school.”
“I bet the little kids love you.”
“They do, I like being goofy with them.” They get to the restaurant, and are seated. “Do you want to share a few things?”
“Sure, that sounds good.” She smiles. “I hardly ever come out here, how’d you find this place?”
“When I was at Tufts I used to come to China Town all the time since it’s close by. I got sick of eating at all of the same places, so I decided to come around here and branch out. This is obviously nicer, but I like it a lot.” They decide which dishes they want to share, and tell the waitress when she comes over. They both also order a couple of drinks. “The semester’s starting soon, right?”
“Yeah, on Monday, actually.”
“Oh, wow! Do you feel ready?”
“For the most part.” She nods. “The first week is usually quiet, and then I start to get booked out. That’s how it was last semester, anyways. I already have some of my regulars from last semester on my calendar for next week.”
“I bet they’re excited to see you, I know I would be.” He places his hand over hers and gives it a squeeze. “Abby, um, after dinner…I was wondering if you’d like to come back to my place for a bit.”
“Oh, that’s so sweet of you to offer, but I don’t want to leave Marvin for that long.” She takes a sip of her drink. “Another time, though.” She smiles and he nods at that.
A food runner brings their dishes over, and luckily nothing feels awkward, but Harry was sort of hoping that she’d offer to have him over after dinner instead. They both enjoy the food, and share a few laughs before heading back to Harry’s car. When he pulls up to her place they both linger for a moment.
“Thanks again for dinner, Harry, I had a great time.”
“Me too.” He looks at her. “Can I ask you something?” She nods yes at him. “Are you, uh, seeing anyone else? It’s okay if you are, we never said this was exclusive, I guess I’d just like to know.”
“No, I’m not seeing anyone else. I would have told you if I was dating around. Are you seeing anyone else?”
“No.”
“Okay.” She smiles. “Good to know.” She leans across the console to kiss him, and he kisses her back. He turns his body more so he can cup her jaw. “Are you busy tomorrow?”
“I…I don’t think so, I mean, just usual weekend errand type stuff. Might be grabbing drinks with some friends in the evening, why?”
“I was just thinking maybe, um, you could come over for dinner, but if you’re busy-“
“I can cancel. I can get drinks with them any time.”
“Don’t be silly.” She smiles. “We can do it another night. We’ll figure it out. I better get upstairs.” She pecks his lips. “Goodnight.” She gets out of the car, leaving him speechless. He wanted to rip his hair out at this point.
//
“Harry, how things going with that girl you’ve been seeing?” Greg asks him as they sit in a booth at the bar.
“Yeah, you still like her?” Lenny asks.
“Things are going well.” He nods. “But I can’t seem to figure her out. We’ve been out, like, six times and she still hasn’t invited me up to her place. I invited her back to mind last night, and she said she didn’t want to leave her dog alone for long.”
“Have you kissed?” Greg asks.
“Yeah, we’ve kissed plenty of times. We just haven’t done anything else. I mean, we don’t need to jump right into bed, but it’d be nice to do a little more.”
“I get what you’re saying, man.” Lenny says. “Maybe she’s just nervous.”
“I didn’t think I was giving her a reason to be.” Harry sighs. “She invited me over tonight, but I stupidly told her I had plans with you lot.”
“What are you doing with us then?! Go pick up some dessert, and go get your girl!” Greg says.
“I can’t just show up at her place…I’ll look like a stalker. What if she’s not even home?”
“So text her.” Lenny shrugs. “See if she’s around and ask if you can stop by. Tell her you’re at bar in the neighborhood.”
“But I’m not. She’ll know I’m lying.”
“Dude, just text her and see if she’s around.” Greg says.
Harry takes out his phone and types out a text. He hesitates before hitting send.
Harry: Hey, Abby! Are you home? I’m finishing up with my friends a bit earlier than I thought…maybe I could bring some dessert over?
Abby: Hey! Yeah, I’m home, snuggled up with Marv. I’d love it if you came by, especially if there’s dessert involved lol
Harry: Great! I can be by in about 30 minutes
Abby: sounds good! See you soon
“Alright, I’m gonna go up to the bar and get a lava cake to go. Thanks for being so cool about this guys.”
“No worries, H.” Lenny says. “Good luck.”
Harry races to Abby’s once he’s gotten the cake, and she buzzes him in. He knocks on her door, and she opens it for him.
“Hey.” She smiles and steps aside. “Come on in.”
“Thanks.” He pecks her cheek. “Hope you like chocolate lava cake.”
“Love it.” She takes it from him. “So…this is it. It’s just a studio.” She blushes. “But the kitchen is its own area, which is nice.”
“It’s great.” He smiles at her. “You’ve definitely utilized the space.”
There’s a large monitor mounted on the wall, a desk underneath it with Abby’s laptop, and an HDMI cord connecting both. There’s a small couch a few feet back, and then her bed is up against the opposite wall. Everything was neat and tidy.
“I use this wireless mouse as a remote, and I have a Fire Stick.” She says. Marvin comes trotting in from the kitchen. “Marv, you remember Harry. I’m just gonna stick this in the kitchen. Feel free to make yourself comfortable.” She walks into the kitchen as Harry sits down on the couch. Marvin jumps up to sit in his lap.
“Hey, little guy.” Harry pets his head and scratches behind his ears. Abby comes back out. She looks really cute tonight. She was wearing glasses, her hair tied to the side in a braid, leggings and an off the shoulder sweater. “Hope I’m not intruding on your cozy evening.”
“Not at all! I’m really glad you texted, actually. Did you have fun with your friends?”
“I did, yeah.”
“Are they dentists too?”
“Mhm, we lived together while we were in medical school. Lenny and Greg.”
“Where do they both work?”
“At other practices around the city. Greg’s actually an orthodontist. They’re both junior partners, though, I’m the first of the three of us to become a senior partner at a practice. Guess that was the one good thing about Dr. Morgan leaving MidCity.”
“You’re so successful.” She bites her bottom lip and looks down at Marvin in Harry’s lap. “Look at that, you’re here five minutes and he already liked you better than me.” She reaches and takes Marvin from Harry, snuggling him to her chest before putting him on the ground.
“I didn’t know you wore glasses.”
“Oh, I don’t. They’re just blue light blockers.” She takes them off and sets them on the side table next to the couch. “They help a lot when I’m on the computer for a while.”
“Ah.” He nods.
“What’s your place like?”
“I’ve got a condo, uh, it’s a three bedroom, but I use one as a home office.”
“Wow, good for you.”
“Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t always get to live so comfortably.”
“You’ve earned it, I bet you work really hard.” She smiles.
“I’m sure you work hard too.”
“True.” She nods. “But I’m paying off loans, and this is all I can really afford.”
“It’s a great place.” He assures her. “I wish the studio I had when I first started out was half as nice as this. I certainly didn’t keep things as neat as you.”
“Oh, I just rushed around to clean things up before you got here. It was a mess.” She laughs.
“I’m glad you were cool with me coming by.” He puts his hand over hers, rubbing his thumb along the back of her hand. “I’ve been having a great time with you this last month.”
“Me too.”
“My birthday’s next weekend, and…um, a ton of us are getting together at this pub…I’d love it if you could come.”
“Oh! Sure, would it be Saturday?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m there, I’d love to go. That’s so nice of you to invite me.” She leans in and kisses his cheek.
He looks at her, his eyes locking in on her lips. He leans in and presses his lips to hers. Her arms go around his neck to pull him closer, her fingers tangling with the curls on the nape of his neck. His arms wrap around her, hands splaying on her back to have her chest pressed to his. He lightly sucks on her bottom lip, and she opens up wider for him. He nearly groans as he licks into her, finally. She tugs on his hair as her tongue molds to his. One of his hands slides down her back and around to the front of her stomach. He just about reaches the band of her leggings when she grabs his hand, and moves it to her hip. He gives a squeeze and she whimpers into him. He plants kisses along her jaw to her earlobe, nibbling on it gently until he kisses on her neck. He mouths at her skin before sucking on her and she gasps.
“Don’t leave a mark.” She grunts, and she feels him nod against her skin. “H-Harry, is this the only reason you wanted to come see me tonight?” She blurts out and he stops to look at her.
“What? No.” He shakes his head. “I genuinely wanted to see you and split that cake. And…I mean…yeah, I’ve been wanting to do a little bit of this.” He runs a hand through his hair. “I like you a lot, Abby, I can’t help it.”
“I like you a lot too.” She gives him a soft smile. “We can keep kissing.”
“Are you sure?”
“Mhm.” She nods and brings her hand to the back of his neck to pull him back to her. This time she nibbles on his bottom lip and his hands go to her hips, squeezing and kneading. “Mm, but I don’t wanna go any further than this…not yet anyways. I hope that’s alright.”
“Of course it is.”
“I just…sort of wanna see where this is going before something so serious happens between us.”
“I get it.” He smiles. “I know you’ll be worth the wait.”
//
Harry: hope the first day of the semester has been treating you well!
Abby couldn’t help but smile at her phone. She knew Harry was extremely busy at work, so the fact that he took a moment to text her meant so much. The only thing was he texted her during a staff meeting, and her colleague Maya noticed her goofy smile.
“Abby, how was your break?” Maya asks her after the meeting.
“It was good! Um, I sort of started seeing someone.”
“Shut up! That’s amazing, who is it, how’d you meet?”
“His name is Harry…he’s, um, my dentist.”
“Oh, my, a doctor?”
“Yeah.” Abby nods. “We actually met years ago when he was still a student, and he just so happened to take over for my other dentist who apparently retired. It’s been a little over a month. He’s super nice, and funny…and he’s really fucking handsome.” She says the last part quietly.
“Good for you. Do you have a picture of him?”
“There’s one on the practice’s website. I haven’t, like, taken a selfie with yet. Although, I wish I had when he took me ice skating.” She pulls up MidCity’s website on her phone and shows Maya.
“Holy shit! He is handsome.”
“It’s going really well too. He’s met Marvin, and he invited me to his birthday party this weekend.”
“Wow, so you’re gonna get to meet his friends already?”
“I guess so.” She smiles. “The only thing is…do I get him a gift? And if so, what do I get him? I feel like it should be casual because everything’s so new still, but if it’s too casual he might think I’m not as into him as I am.”
“Shit, yeah, that’s a tough one.” Maya steps further into Abby’s office. The girls were close, so they were used to talking about personal things. “Have you slept with him yet? You could wear something for him to unwrap.”
“No, we haven’t.” Abby sighs. “I’m trying to take things slow with him because I really like him. We’ve made out a couple of times…”
“So…is that a no?”
“I don’t know, birthday sex as a gift? I feel like that’s so…cliché or something? Plus, I feel like he’ll be expecting it. I want it to feel more special than that.” She bites her bottom lip in thought.
“Oh! Have you been out to eat with him much?”
“Yeah, a ton, why?”
“Did you notice him order any specific types of alcohol?”
“Yeah! On our first real date he had this really nice bottle of white wine ordered to our table. It was delicious, and he loved it. I remember what it was, I could just get a bottle of that and a card, right?”
“I think that’s a totally acceptable gift. It’s sentimental, so it shows you put some thought into it, but also casual enough to show you’re not a psycho.”
“Exactly.”
Abby: you’re so sweet! It’s been a little busy with meetings and stuff, but other than that no fires to put out. Thanks so much for thinking of me, I hope you’re having a good day too! 😘
//
Harry didn’t want Abby to walk into the pub by herself, so he said he’d pick her up on his way. She insisted he didn’t need to, but he insisted that he did. She had a black dress on with black tights and blue heels. She zips up her long coat and runs her fingers through her hair. Her phone buzzes with a text from Harry that he’s downstairs with the uber. She takes a deep breath, grabs her gift, and heads downstairs.
“Happy birthday.” She smiles and gives him a peck on the cheek.
“Thanks, beautiful.” He opens the door for her and goes around to the other side. “Is that for me?” He points to the bag she’s settled into her lap.
“Maybe.” She shrugs a shoulder.
“You didn’t have to get me anything.” He places his hand on her thigh.
“I said maybe, so this could easily not be for you. I guess you’ll find out later.” She side eyes him and it makes him laugh.
“How was your first week back to campus?”
“Exhausting.” She sighs. “But I caught up on sleep this morning. Everyone was excited to see Marvin.” She chuckles. “And it was good to see my friends and students.”
“That’s good.” Harry smiles.
“What about you? How was your week?”
“Busy. I had four different surgeries, a ton of cavities, and a fuck ton of cleaning check ins. I think a lot of college kids were getting in their bi-annual visits before going back to school.”
“Ohhh, yup, I bet that’s what it was. Is there ever a time of year you’re super busy?”
“I would say summers I do a lot of wisdom teeth removals, so I get bogged down there. Everything’s pretty consistent, though.”
“So, who’s going to be at this party?”
“My friends Greg and Lenny, who are very excited to meet you.” Harry smiles and gives Abby’s thigh a squeeze. “Some people from work, you know Marie, and Dr. Morgan’s going to be there as well. Some other med school buddies will be there. I’m only thirty-two it’s not really a big deal.” He shrugs.
“I’m excited to meet your friends too.” She smiles. “And it’ll be good that I’ll know a couple of people so you won’t feel like you have to babysit me.”
“Aw, babe, I wouldn’t feel like that. I wouldn’t leave your side if that’s what you wanted, no worries.”
She nods and smiles nervously at him. He just called her ‘babe’ and it filled her tummy with butterflies. The driver pulls up in front of the pub, and Harry gets out first so he can open Abby’s door. She smiles at him as he puts his hand on the small of her back to lead her inside.
“There he is!” Greg exclaims. “Happy birthday, H!” The two hug.
“Thanks, mate, this is Abby. Abby, this is Greg.”
“It’s nice to meet you.” She says to him.
“Same to you, you’re even lovelier than Harry described.”
Abby giggles at that, and Harry leads her over to the coat room. It seems the whole pub had been rented out for his party. There was a small table for gifts, so she sets hers down.
“Wow, you look amazing.” Harry says, rubbing his hands up and down her arms.
“Thanks.” She smiles and leans in to peck his lips. “Wanna introduce me to some other people?”
“Yeah, come on.” He takes her hand and leads her back to everyone.
Abby gets introduced to Lenny, and some of Harry’s other doctor friends. She then gives Dr. Morgan a big hug, and she says hello to Marie and her wife. Harry gets Abby a glass of wine, and much to her surprise, he keeps his arm hooked around her waist for most of the evening. He clearly wanted her close by. His friends were kind, not at all arrogant, which was a tad unexpected since there were a lot of people with deep pockets in the room. Maybe doctors weren’t as snotty because they also had large student loan debts. They engaged her in conversation, asking about her work, and why the heck she wanted to spend her time with Harry, which made a lot of people laugh. Harry lit up when he was explaining how he and Abby actually met ears ago, and he talked about the card she had sent along to him, making her blush a bit. Everyone found the story to be quite endearing.
“Are you having a good time?” Harry asks Abby as they go up to the bar together.
“I am, your friends are great. Are you? It’s your birthday.”
“I’m having a wonderful time, even more so since you’re here.” He kisses her cheek and hands her a new glass of wine.
A tray of cupcakes is brought out, and everyone sings happy birthday to Harry. He blows out a few candles and thanks everyone for coming. The cupcakes were delicious, clearly from a nice bakery. Harry notices Abby getting a little bit of frosting on the corner of her mouth, and before she can grab a napkin, he’s catching it with his thumb and sucking it into his mouth. Her eyes widen as he winks at her.
“Th-thank you.” She says, clearing her throat.
“Don’t mention it.” He pecks her lips. “I was wondering something…”
“What is it?”
“Would you like to come home with me tonight? I thought it would be nice to spend some time alone after being so social.”
“Oh, um, yeah, I’d like that.” She nods.
“Will Marvin be alright without you?”
“Yeah, my, um, neighbor’s kid is actually watching him tonight. She’s a great pet sitter. I…I told her I may not be coming home tonight, so she’s fully prepared for a sleepover.”
Harry’s smile grows, and he kisses her again. After making the rounds to say goodbye to everyone, getting their coats, gathering all of the gifts, the two get into an uber to head to Harry’s condo. There’s a doorman that says hello to Harry and gives Abby a warm smile. She follows him through the lobby to the elevators. They step inside, and Harry hits a number on one of the higher floors. He leads her to his door, and he gets it open. She follows him into his living area, and they set his gifts down. He takes her coat for her, and hangs it up in his front closet.
“This is…a really nice place.” She says as she looks around.
“I’ll give you the full tour in a moment, I’ve been dying to open your gift all night.”
“Oh.” She blushes. “It’s really nothing special.”
He gives her an unconvinced look, and grabs the bag he remembers her bringing. They both sit down on the coach, and she watches him reach inside.
“A card, classic.” He smirks and sets it aside. He reaches back inside and pulls out the bottle of wine. “This is one of my favorites! How did you know?”
“I remember you ordering it when we went to that Italian place.” She smiles and he hugs her.
“Mind if I open it, or have you had enough for the night?”
“I’d love some.”
“Great! Just hang tight.”
Harry goes into the kitchen with the bottle. While she’s waiting patiently on the couch, Abby hears music come on. She sees a Bluetooth speaker light up, he must have turned it on from his phone. He comes out with two glasses of wine, and hands her one as he sits back down.
“Thank you.” She says as she takes a sip.
“No, thank you. This was really nice of you. You’ve got a great memory.” He takes a sip and sets the glass down on a coaster on his coffee table. She does the same. “My friends adored you, by the way. I’ve already got the texts to prove it.”
“I’m glad I made such a good first impression.” She inches closer to him.
He reaches to tuck some hair behind her ear, and he leans in to kiss her. She wraps her arms around his neck, and opens her mouth for him. One of his hands falls to her thigh as the other one cups her cheek. Her fingers work their way into his hair, and he squeezes her hip.
“Abby.” He breathes, and moves to kiss on her neck, just under her earlobe.
She lets her heels fall off as she pushes him back farther on the couch. She moves to straddle one of his thighs, and she brings her lips back to his. His hands move up and down her back until they reach just above her bum. She grabs his hands and moves them down to her ass. He groans into her as he squeezes, loving how plump she is. She kisses along his jaw and to his neck, and she rolls her hips down onto his thigh. He raises it to help press into her. She whimpers into his neck, and he cups her cheeks so she’ll at him.
“Do you wanna take this to the bedroom?” He asks softly.
“I don’t wanna go to sleep yet.”
“I didn’t think you did.” He smirks.
“No, I just…I mean, if we go in there…that’s all I’ll want to do.”
“Sleep?” She nods her head yes. “Oh.”
“Harry, I’m sorry.” She sighs. “I know it’s your birthday, and you were probably hoping for some…stuff to go down between us, but I think we should wait a little longer. Is that okay?”
“Abby, I wasn’t expecting us to do anything. I mean, if we had of course it would have been nice, but it’s okay.” He assures her. “I’m just happy you wanted to come back with me.”
She leans back in to kiss him, and they continue to grope each other as they kiss. Their tongues swirl around each other, and she continues to rock back and forth on his thigh. She lets him puts his hands on her breasts, and he kneads them through her dress. He moves her to lay down on the couch and he settles himself between her legs as he hovers over her. He kisses on the tops of her breasts that were now spilling out of her dress. He sucks and bites on the plushier areas, eliciting a moan from her.
“H-Harry, maybe we should cool it before you turn me into a leopard.”
He chuckles against her and pecks her lips before he sits up.
“Would you spend the night?”
“I’d love to.”
He helps her up off the couch and leads her to the bedroom. He flips the switch for the lights, and her eyes widen. His bedroom was neat, almost a little too neat. She raises a suspicious eyebrow at him.
“I…um, have a housekeeper.” He clears his throat. “Let me just grab a few things for you. I’m assuming you’ll want something to sleep in?”
“Please.” She chuckles, watching him move to his dresser for a tee shirt and pajama bottoms.
She follows him into his en suite as he opens the closet inside to look for a spare washcloth and toothbrush. He sets everything down on his double vanity and smiles at her.
“Use whatever you need, beautiful.” He kisses her cheek and steps out to give her some privacy.
Abby strips herself of her clothes, and then washes her face. She brushes her teeth, runs her fingers through her hair, and then puts on the clothes Harry set aside for her. They were so soft and smelled just like him. She sighs happily and makes her way back into his bedroom. He smiles at her and stands up from the bed.
“Get comfortable, I’m just gonna do my thing.” He tells her and she nods. “There’s a spare phone charger on that side of the bed if you need it.” He points to the right side and she smiles.
When he’s done in the bathroom he comes out in a pair of plaid bottoms, but he’s gotten rid of his shirt altogether. He was littered with tattoos which really surprised her. She thought he only had the one little cross on his hand.
“When did you get all of those?” She asks as he gets into bed with her.
“All of what? Oh! My tattoos? Years and years ago, when I was a stupid teenager.” He chuckles. “Haven’t added to the collection in a while.” He looks down at himself. “Do you, uh, not like tattoos?”
“No! I think they’re really cool.” She furrows her brows as she scans his chest. “They’re so interesting.”
“Thanks.” He smirks.
“Did they hurt?”
“Some more than others. You sort of get used to it after a while. I’m assuming you don’t have any?”
“No.” She shakes her head. “Just a few piercings.”
“Yeah?”
“Mhm.” She tucks some hair behind her ear. “Got my cartilage, and three holes in each lobe.”
“Noticed those, I love the earrings you wear.”
“And…” She pulls the blankets back a bit and pulls the shirt she’s wearing up slightly to reveal her belly button. “Got this done when I was twenty-two. I always wanted one and said fuck it.”
“It’s cute.” He smiles as he admire the jewel attached to her naval. “Now that had to have hurt.” He says as she puts her shirt back down.
“It honestly wasn’t as bad as I thought. It was just a little pinch, the guy took really good care of me. I was a little light headed after, and it was sore for a few days, but other than that it was fine.”
They stay up talking for a bit until they eventually fall asleep. Abby had moves to rest her head on Harry’s chest, and that’s how she fell asleep, to the smooth rhythm of his heartbeat. Harry couldn’t remember the last time someone spent the night in his bed and it didn’t involve sex, there was something sort of sweet about not doing anything and still be able to fall asleep together comfortably. Maybe there was something to this taking it slow thing.
The next morning, Abby woke up being spooned by Harry. His breath was fanning over the back of her neck, and he had a leg between hers. His arm was strung across her lower stomach lazily. She grabs her phone and sees that it’s about 8:30. She yawns and wiggles a bit to adjust herself. She feels his lips press a kiss into the back of her neck and his arm tightens around her stomach.
“You awake, darling?” He coos and it nearly makes her melt.
“Mhm.” It’s all she can manage to say.
“Good morning then.” He kisses the back of her neck again.
“Good morning.” She rolls over to her other side to look at him and he gives her a sleep smile. He leans into peck her nose, and he rubs at her side.
“Sleep alright?”
“Yeah, did you?”
“Mhm.” He nods. “I’m gonna wash up and then make us some breakfast, how does that sound?”
“Sounds amazing, Harry.”
He gets up and makes his way to the bathroom. When he comes out he’s thrown a shirt on, and Abby gets up to freshen up herself. She washes her face and brushes her teeth, putting her bra on under the shirt he had given her so she wasn’t putting on a show for him. She comes out to his kitchen and smells fresh coffee. She wanted to roll her eyes as she saw him using a French press.
“Hope you like hazelnut, it’s the only flavor I’ve got.”
“It’s perfect. Got any creamer?”
“Mhm, in the fridge.” He points to it and she opens it up, grabbing the creamer on the top shelf. It was pretty much full.
“I don’t use it myself, mostly keep it for guests.” He pours the coffee into two mugs.
“Ah, and do you have guests often?”
“None that I’d want to have a sleepover with, if that’s what you’re asking.” He kisses her cheek, and she pours the creamer into her coffee. “Now, what can I make you? What do you like for breakfast?”
“Oh, nothing fancy.” She shrugs. “Whatever you feel like making is fine.”
“Eggs and toast?”
“Works for me. Can I help?”
“You can help by just having a seat.”
Abby smiles and sits down on one of the stools at Harry’s kitchen island while he works to get the eggs out of the fridge. He ends up making scrambled eggs for the two of them to keep things quick. It was a pleasant breakfast. Abby thought it was cute that Harry genuinely read from the morning newspaper. She was resting her chin on her palm watching him.
“Anything interesting going on?” She asks him.
“Nah, it’s all negative.” He sighs as he flips a page.
“Could I have the funnies?”
“Sure!” Harry finds the chunk with the comics and slides it over to her.
“Thanks, I used to look forward to this every Sunday when my dad would pick up The Globe.”
“What was your favorite?”
“There was this one called Opus. There were all these different characters, and the story was pretty linear, which I thought was cool. I actually saved the last comic strip in a scrap book. The main characters, Opus the penguin, had gone missing or something and he was trying to find himself. It really tugged at my heartstrings.”
“Sometimes I forget not all of the funnies are just for kids.”
“I’m also partial to Family Circus, and I loved Zits.”
Harry smiles and goes back to reading the paper. He liked going over the sports and arts sections most. Abby helps him clean up the dishes and then she goes to get dressed.
“Do you want some sweat pants to wear so you don’t have to put all of that back on?”
“No, I’m okay. I’m just gonna put the dress on.”
“Won’t you be cold without the stockings?”
“I’ll be alright, but thanks.”
“Let me at list drive you home.”
“Okay.” She nods.
The ride was comfortably quiet as Harry kept his hand in Abby’s. He pulls over to the side to stop in front of her building, and they look at each other. Smiles grow on both of their faces.
“You already know what I’m going to ask.” He says to her.
“I know, but I wanna hear you say it.”
“Alright, when can I see you next?”
“Hmm…what about Tuesday night? We could go to a movie. Tickets are cheaper on Tuesdays so we can splurge on snacks.”
“I like the way you think. I’d love to go to a movie. You pick, and just tell me what time I need to meet you.”
“Sounds good.” She leans in to peck his lips. “Talk to you soon.” She gets out of the car and heads up to her apartment. Chrissy, the teenager watching Marvin, was sitting on her couch watching TV. “Hey, Chrissy. I already paid you on Venmo.”
“I saw! Thanks so much.” She stands up.
“Thanks for watching him all night.” Abby scoops up Marvin and cuddles him to her chest. “I hope he wasn’t too much trouble.”
“Not at all, he was great. He was my little study buddy.”
“Perfect. Well, enjoy your Sunday. Tell your parents thanks too.”
“I will, have a good day.” Chrissy heads out and Abby sets Marvin back down.
“Alright, Mumma’s gonna take a shower and then she’ll take you for a nice, long walk, sound good?” Marvin yips excitedly at her. “S’what I thought.”
//
Harry was fucked. He was running late and couldn’t get to a phone because he was in the middle of a surgery. Of course the one time there’s a few delays and complications he actually has somewhere to be. He was supposed to meet Abby at 6:45PM, it was already 6:30, there was no way in hell he was going to make it. He did his best to stay focused so he could do right by his patient. By the time he was done it was 7:45PM. He tried to call Abby, but her phone went right to voicemail.”
“Shit.” He says to himself.
“Dr. Styles.” Marie says. “You should change, you’re still scrubbed up and you have blood on you. Go home and shower, she’ll understand.”
“I just wish she’d turn her phone on…”
“Maybe she went to the movie alone.” Marie shrugs. “She could be one of those good people who actually turns their phone off.”
“Right, yeah. I’m gonna freshen up here, and then I’m gonna try to catch her outside the theater.”
Harry does just that, using the hospital locker room to have a quick shower. He rushes to the movie theater and waits outside. The movie they were supposed to see should be wrapping up any moment, so he goes into the lobby to watch for her. Hopefully she was actually there.
Abby throws out her trash and walks towards the main lobby. She was just turning her phone back on when she saw Harry standing there with a very apologetic look on his face. She sighs and walks over to him.
“I’m so sorry.” He starts. “I tried calling as soon as I could, but your phone went right to voicemail.”
“I turned it off when the previews started.” She chews on her bottom lip. “What happened?”
“My last surgery of the day got delayed, and then there were some complications…everything’s fine now, but it wasn’t an easy extraction. I had to really take my time, I’m so sorry. I swear this won���t happen a lot.” He looks down at his shoes and then back to her. “Was it a good movie at least?”
“It was alright.” She sighs. “Would have been better if I had someone to make comments to.” She nudges his shoulder.
“How can I make it up to you? Are you hungry? We could-“
“I already ate, it’s okay. I know you didn’t do anything on purpose. It’s getting late, so I’m just going to head home.”
“I feel terrible.”
“Don’t.” She smiles. “Shit happens.”
“Let me at least take you home, I drove here.”
“Sure.” She takes his hand in hers as they walk out of the theater. “Are you hungry?”
“Starved, actually, but I can just eat when I get home.”
“Don’t be silly, I have leftovers. You can come up and eat if you want.”
“I’d like that.”
Once they’re up in her apartment, Harry plays with Marvin while Abby heats up her leftover stir fry and rice. She hands Harry the warm bowl and they both sit down at the small table she has in her kitchen.
“Is it hot enough?” She asks him.
“It’s perfect, thank you.” He eats a little and then looks at her. “I really do feel terrible that you waited and had to sit alone…”
“It’s really okay. It’s not my first time going to the movies by myself.” She shrugs. “I’m pretty independent.”
“I just don’t want you thinking this is something that’s going to happen a lot. It’s so rare for a surgery like this to not be timely.”
“I’ll take your word for it.” She gives him a reassuring smile. “It’s really sweet you still showed up at the theater like you did. We’re together now, that’s all that really matters.”
Harry finishes eating and cleans up his bowl. He stands with his hands in his pockets by the door and she stands with her arms crossed. Neither were sure what to do. It was really too late to hang out any longer since they both needed to work the next day.
“Are you free Friday night?” He asks her. “We could go to dinner if you like.”
“Sure, that sounds nice. Wanna say seven?”
“Works for me. I’ll pick you up then.” He caresses her cheek and kisses her. They both linger for a moment before letting go. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.” She sighs after he leaves. It sucked being at the movies alone, but it meant the world to her that he still showed up at the end. It really showed his character, and for that she was grateful. She was still trying to gauge what kind of guy Harry was, and she had finally come to the conclusion that he was a good one.
//
“Two months and still nothing?” Greg asks Harry one Sunday evening as he and Lenny came over to watch the hockey game.
“Yeah.” Harry sighs as he sips on his beer. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love kissing her and, and she’s let me touch her over her clothes, but…I don’t know, she’s not as desperate and grabby as I am. What if she’s just not as into me?”
“I don’t think she’d be seeing you still if she wasn’t into you.” Lenny says. “How old is she again?”
“Twenty-six, why?”
“Well, maybe she’s hoping for things to be a little more official before she goes all the way with you.”
“Define official.” Harry mutters.
“Maybe she wants to know if you’re her boyfriend.” Lenny states.
“God, do you really think she’s hung up on some stupid label? We’re dating, we’re together, I think that’s pretty clear.”
“Remember when I dated that younger girl? She was, like, twenty-three?” Greg says and the guys both nod. “Well, she wanted to know what the status was after a few months. Obviously it didn’t work out because of the age difference, but these things matter to the younger women. They wanna know what to refer to you. Boyfriend is a lot easier to say than having to say the guy I’m seeing.”
“So, you have to ask yourself, do you want to be Abby’s boyfriend?” Lenny asks him. “If you don’t see things working out long term with her you should break it off.”
“I definitely don’t want to break it off. I really like her, and I like spending time with her.” He runs a hand through his hair. “I’m going to her place on Thursday for dinner, maybe we can talk about it then.”
“Yeah? She cooking for you again?” Greg asks.
“Mhm.” Harry smiles. “She really likes cooking for me, I don’t know why. I don’t mind it, she always makes something delicious.”
“Do you ever cook for her?” Lenny asks.
“Sure.” Harry shrugs. “We take turns.”
“That’s good, those things should definitely go both ways.” Greg says. “I bet you she just wants to make sure you’re not going to up and leave the second she lets you hit it.”
“I don’t know why she’d even think I’d do something like that…”
“Maybe she’s been burned in the past.” Lenny shrugs. “Have you had the ex talk?”
“No.” Harry shakes his head. “It doesn’t seem like something we’ve needed to talk about…but maybe we do.”
//
Thursday night Harry goes over to Abby’s with a bottle of wine and a box of chocolate chip cookies. He liked bringing dessert the times she made dinner for him.
“Hey.” She smiles and kisses him once he’s inside. She must’ve had a long day at work because she was still in her work clothes. Most times when Harry came over she had already changed into comfier clothes. “How was your day?”
“It was good, how about yours?” He hands her the wine and cookies and follows her into the kitchen.
“Long.” She sighs. “I had some heavier appointments today.” She blinks a few times. “I…I cried with a student today.” She looks at him, tearing up.
“Oh, baby, I’m so sorry, come here.” He opens his arms for her and she’s comforted by his embrace. He rests his chin on the top of her head. “Are you allowed to tell me what happened?”
“Yeah.” She sniffles and looks up at him. “This male student…he had a rough go of it in high school. A teacher…molested him, and it was this whole thing. He’s from a small town in Vermont so everyone knew. He came here to get away from it, you know? Make a fresh start? He’s started to see this girl that he really likes, and he’s petrified of her finding out, and he’s not sure if he should just tell her or if he should keep it to himself. But he’s afraid she might find out anyways somehow. I felt terrible. I mean, what kind of sick fuck uses their position of power over a kid like that, you know?”
“That’s…awful, beyond awful.” Harry frowns down at Abby.
“I just couldn’t keep it together, especially when he started crying, so I cried too. Then we both started laughing, and he was able to calm down and we talked about things more.” She steps back from Harry and wipes under eyes.
“I guess the upside is that you created such a welcoming environment that he felt safe enough to be so vulnerable with you.”
“Yeah.” She nods. “I suppose that’s a silver lining, thanks.” She smiles. “Anyways, we’re going to meet bi-weekly now just for little check ins.” She sighs and moves to stir the pot of pasta that’s on the stove. “I’m making pasta and meat sauce, hope that’s alright.”
“It’s great, Abby. Can I do anything?”
“No, everything’s just about done. Um, would you actually mind taking Marv out quickly for me? He just ate and I haven’t had a chance to take him out to do his business.”
“You got it.”
It wasn’t Harry’s first time taking Marvin out, so he really didn’t mind. He leashes him up and takes him down to the street. Marvin does his business, and Harry gets him back upstairs. By the time he comes back, Abby’s plated up dinner, and gotten the wine open and poured.
“Thank you.” She says to him, and leans down to pat Marvin’s head. “Ready to eat?”
“Mhm, thank you for cooking.”
“Oh, it was nothing.” She smiles. “I like when we get to have dinner together.”
“Me too, babe.” He takes a bite of food and moans. “This is amazing, Ab.”
“Thanks.” She blushes and takes a sip of her wine. “Harry, um, there’s something I…well…I’m just gonna come right out and say it.” She takes a deep breath as he looks at her. “Am I…am I your girlfriend?”
Harry’s concerned face softens into a smile.
“I’d like you to be.” He says to her. “I was actually going to bring this up tonight, guess you beat me to it.”
“Oh.” She says, a little surprised. “Well, good, okay.” She nods and takes a bite of food.
“I like you a lot, and I know it’s been a couple of months. I’m still having a great time with you.”
“Same here!” She assures him. “I just, you know, I don’t know what to tell my friends sometimes when they ask about you.”
“Well, now you can tell them about your boyfriend, yeah?” He smirks. “When do I get to meet these friends, hm? You’ve met all of mine.”
“That’s true.” She chews her bottom lip. “Well, I could arrange for a night out at a bar some weekend. We all love going out to dance and stuff…”
“Sounds like fun.”
“You’d be into something like that?”
“Sure, why not?”
“You just don’t exactly seem like the type of person who would enjoy going to a stuffy club with a ton of drunk people.”
“Hey, I know how to hang. Set it up and I’ll be there.”
“Great, I’ll text them.” She smiles, her body was buzzing with excitement. Harry stands up abruptly and comes over to her side of the table, cupping her jaw. He slots his lips over hers, sucking on her bottom lip and then letting her go before he sits back down. “Wh-what was that for?”
“Just wanted to give my girlfriend a kiss.” He shrugs, a smirk forming on his lips.
“Oh.” Her face had to be beat red at this point. They look at each other and smile. This time it’s Abby who decides to be bold. She gets up and sits on his lap side saddle. She grabs her phone and opens up SnapChat because it was better for taking selfies.
“What are you doing?”
“We hardly have any pictures together. Now that you’re my boyfriend that’s going to change. Smile.” She says to him, and he does as she says, taking a very cute picture.
“Send that to me?”
Abby presses her lips to his. Getting through dinner was going to take a little longer tonight.  
//
Harry could, in fact, not hang. It was midnight and he was fighting to stay awake. He wished Abby had planned their big night out with her friends for a Saturday not Friday. It was a long week, and Harry just wanted to go to bed. He thought her friends were interesting. There was Billy, Abby’s absolute best friend. Billy happens to be trans, which Harry didn’t care about at all because Billy’s life was none of his business. Then there was Amy and Gina, Abby’s roommates from undergrad. They were all getting along fine, but the club was loud, packed, and sticky. Abby was having a good time, though, so what could he do?
“Another drink, Harry? Next round’s on me.” Billy says to him.
“Oh, no thank you. Think I’m gonna cool it.”
“Cool it?” Amy scoffs. “The night just started. Ab, hold old did you say he was again?”
“Don’t tease him.” Abby hooks an arm around Harry’s waist. “He’s thirty-two, a doctor, and he had a long week.” She looks up at him. “You’ve last two hours, go home if you want.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I’ll call you tomorrow.” She puckers her lips and he kisses her.
“It was really nice meeting all of you. We’ll have to do it again sometime…maybe on a night I didn’t have two different surgeries.” He kisses Abby again. “Text me when you get home so I know you got back safe?”
“Will do, bye, babe!” Harry heads out, and Abby looks back at her friends. “He’s cute, right?”
“Very.” Gina says. “He seemed like he was having fun at the beginning.”
“He’s just tired.” Abby sighs. “We should have waited until tomorrow. He really is a lot of fun.”
“I’m sure he is.” Billy says with a smile. “So, you really haven’t slept with him yet?”
“No.” Abby shakes her head.
“What’s the hold up?” Amy asks.
“I just haven’t felt ready.” Abby shrugs. “He’s a really good kisser, though, so I know I’m close to getting there with him.”
“You haven’t even sucked his dick?” Gina asks.
“No, but I’ve felt it. We grind on each other a lot. But I always have us stop before it gets to be too much.”
“I’ve literally never known you to not want to fuck a guy you’ve been seeing.” Billy says.
“I know…I just…it all just feels like a dream come true still, and I’m afraid that once we do it something will go wrong and we’ll stop seeing each other. I have no idea why I feel like that, but I do.” Abby says.
“He’d be an idiot to let you go.” Amy says. “Do it when you’re ready, but I think I speak for the three of us when I say we approve of him.”
“Thanks, that means a lot.” The four share a group hug and go back out to the dancefloor to enjoy the rest of their night.
//
It was a rainy Saturday at the beginning of April. Harry told Abby to bring Marvin over to his place so they could get cozy for a lazy day of watching movies and being cozy. She happily accepted. The two of them really needed a day to relax. Abby was booked solid at work right now, and Harry was starting to get booked out with more and more wisdom teeth appointments. Harry liked when Abby would bring Marvin over. He had gotten a little dog bed for him and some toys. Harry even got him a little food and water bowl.
Abby was really falling for Harry. He made her feel safe, and he was beyond considerate. She also couldn’t believe how patient he was being. They were together three months, just entering the fourth, and they still hadn’t had sex yet. She knew he wanted it, of course, and she really wanted it too.
They were curled up on the couch together while Marvin was snoozing on his little dig bed. Neither had ever watched The Mindy Project before so they were binging it. Abby couldn’t believe what she was about to do, but she couldn’t help from blurting it out.
“Harry?” She looks up at him.
“Yeah?” He looks down at her.
“I…I love you.” His eyes widen as he looks at her, his mouth falling open. “Oh my god, it’s too soon, right? I…I…I…” Before she can ramble on anymore, he’s kissing her, hard.
“Christ, Abby.” He presses his forehead to hers. “I love you too.” He kisses her again.
“Really?”
“Of course I do. You couldn’t tell? I’ve got your picture framed on my night table, and I’ve got all this stuff here for Marvin, and I keep your favorite snacks in the pantry…”
She moves to straddle him, pushing his shoulders back into the couch. She slots her mouth over his, and he holds her close to him. She sucks on his bottom lip, making him groan.
“Harry, bring me to your bedroom, now.”
“Y-you wanna go to sleep?” He looks at her confused.
“No, I want you to fuck me.” She looks at him with dark eyes.
“Really?”
“Yes!”
He doesn’t question her again. Instead, he lifts her up and quickly carries her down the hall to his bedroom. He gets her on the bed, hovers over her, and starts by getting her shirt off. His eyes widen when he sees the lace bra she was wearing. He furrows his brows as he gets her leggings off. He glares at her when he sees that her panties match her bra.
“What is it?” She asks innocently.
“There’s this old saying that goes along the lines of if the girl’s wearing matching underwear, then she’s the one who decided to have sex.” Abby blinks at him. “Were you planning for this tonight?”
“I was hoping.” She sits up on her elbows. “I…I’ve been fucked over before, and I really wanted to make sure I knew how we felt about each other before we did this. I’m sorry that I made us wait so long.”
“Don’t be sorry, baby.” He caresses her cheek. “I’ll admit I was a little frustrated in the beginning, but…I’m sort of glad we waited. It’ll be more special now.”
“Exactly!” She beams at him. “Can…can we get back to it now?”
He chuckles and takes his shirt off and pants off. He hovers over her and kisses on her neck and chest. He reaches behind her to unhook her bra, and tugs it away. His lips wrap around one of her nipples, and he licks around it. He sucks on her, and it makes her moan. He licks over to her other breast, and sucks on her other nipple. She pushes his head closer to her chest and tugs at his hair. He kisses and nips his way down her soft tummy. She lifts her hips as he tugs her panties off. He opens her legs and sucks a bruise into her thigh. She gasps at that and groans. He licks a flat stripe up her slit and to her clit. He does this a few times, just to get a good taste of her.
He looks up at her as his tongue flicks back and forth on her clit. He presses a hand on her pelvis and pushes up so he can see her better. He sucks on her clit and she moans out. His fingers work around her folds, feeling her wetness, and then he slides his middle finger in. He gets his ring finger in as well, and starts to pump in and out of her. He moans into her as his hips rut against the bed. She grabs at his hair as his fingers start to rub against her front wall. Abby starts panting and breathing heavier.
“Fuck, Harry, please don’t stop!”
He groans into her as his answer, and keeps doing everything exactly the same to help get her there. Her hips move along with his face, and her body starts to feel warm all over. She cries out as she comes to her release. He retracts his fingers, and he sucks on her wet center before sitting up. She catches her breath and smiles at him. He smiles at her and gets his boxers off. She whimpers when she looks at his hard dick. She crawls towards him and wraps her hand around him. She kisses his tip and wraps her lips around him.
“God, I’ve been dreaming about this.” He groans as his head rolls back while she starts to bob up and down on him. She goes down enough to choke on him, and then she pulls off. “Do you want me to use a condom?”
“No, I’m on the pill. I wanna feel you.”
He nods and gets back onto the bed with her. She opens her legs back up for him, and he rubs the head of his cock along her folds and clit. Her hips press up towards him in anticipation. He slowly presses into her, and her mouth falls open.
“Jesus, you’re so fucking tight.” He grunts as he bottoms out.
“Move.” She tells him. “Move, Harry.” She whines, and he starts to rock in and out of her. She clutches at his biceps and digs her nails in. “Oh my god.” She moans.
“Feels good?”
“Feels amazing.” She bites her bottom lip. “Go harder.”
“Yeah, want me to fuck you hard?”
“Fuck, yeah, really give it to me.”
He gives her a wicked grin, and then pulls out of her. He flips her onto her stomach and slides back in. He grips the back of her neck, and his other hand rests at the base of her spine. He takes a deep breath, pulls out almost all the way, and then snaps his hips back into her. She gasps, and he does it again. He smacks her ass, and continues to fuck into her hard. The hand at the base of her spine slides around to her clit and he rubs it. It doesn’t take her long to lose it again. He pulls out and sits up against his headboard. Abby sinks down on him as he grips her hips. They move in sync together as she rides him. She licks into his mouth and they both moan. His hands grab all over her body, unsure of where he liked squeezing the most. He fondles her breasts for a bit before deciding to stick with her ass.
“You’re so fucking beautiful like this, Abby.” He says as he kisses on her neck. “I want you to come for me again.” He snakes a hand between them so he can rub her clit again.
“Fuck, yes, oh my god, Harry!” She grinds faster on him. “I want you to come inside me.”
“Shit, fuck.” He moans out and they come at the same time. “Fuck, Abby.” He breathes and kisses her, sucking on her bottom lip. Her fingers tangle back into his hair.
“Was it, um, worth the wait?”
“Oh my god, of course it was. I wanna fuck you over and over.” He smirks at her and she giggles.
“I think that can be arranged.” She pecks his lips. “Would you ever want to, um, tie me to the bed?”
“Oh, baby, if I didn’t love you before.”
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willowbleedsonpaper · 3 years
Text
Winter In The Shade IV
Part IV
Sirius Black x Ravenclaw Reader
W.C. : 2504
Requested by @amourtentiaa : It is Sirius' fifth year at Hogwarts, the same year he ran away from home and to the Potter's. Soon, he discovers the unfamiliar sight of his brother Regulus smiling and looking truly happy, next to him a Ravenclaw girl who immediately captures his interest. What will happen when the Black family gets involved in their sons lives and the ones they hold close to their hearts?
Warnings: None
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Masterlist | Series Masterlist
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As the days grew colder and a thin layer of snow covered the entirety of Hogwarts, the enthuthiasm was more than present over the students, after all, it wasn’t every year that the school hosted a small party for the students that decided to stay at Hogwart for the holidays. The cold halls were softly illuminated with the small flames from candles, the elves worked hard on the kitchens, the smell from their meals nothing but mouthwatering to anyone that walked past the great hall; stepping outside from the castle into the courtyard and the hills that rolled down to the black lake, you were met with nothing but never ending whites from the soft snow that fell from the sky at all hours. It was truly magical.
“Don’t you love it?” you said, extending your hand in the air as little snowflakes settled on your palm, the tingles rushing up your arm from the coldness making you erupt in giggles as you shook your hand. You rose your gaze to see Regulus sitting on the edge of the fountain, the water that usually flowed now frozen in eccentric shapes that you could easily think was the picture of an explosion that froze before it scattered all over the floor. And of course, Regulus was breaking the tiny pieces of the tips for his own amusement “Stop that!” you laughed, coming to sit with him as you took his hand away “You’re destroying mother nature's art.”
He chuckled lowly, taking his hand away from yours “That’s hardly art.” he argued “Besides, I can always re-shape it so it would actually be some kind of sculpture.”
“Right.” you scoffed, narrowing your eyes at him “What would make a good sculpture, Michelangelo?” you asked.
He playfully glared at you but then took a moment to think, both of you sitting on the edge of the fountain while facing the frozen water. People walked past the two of you, no one taking a moment to stop and wonder what Y/N and Regulus were up too, they all had stopped asking questions about what you two did with your time.
It was late during the day, one evening when the sun was setting and the stars started to appear in the sky, Professors and students alike started to follow the trail of water left in the stone floors of the castle, the worry rising as they all wondered what had gotten inside the halls of Hogwarts that left such a trail as if someone carried buckets of water only to pour them all over the floor. In the end they found you and Regulus, sitting in one of the balconies of the second floor. You were both dead silent, sitting close to each other as if you were glued; your hair was flat and sticking to your face while Regulus’ lips turned a deep shade of purple and his skin became more lighter than anyone thought possible. Both of your teeth chattered as a puddle of water formed at your feet, but you refused to move. A crowd formed before you but neither one of you said a word, eyes narrowed and empty of any emotion as you stared into the void. It wasn’t until the shock had left the Professor's bodies that they jumped into action and made you both go get changed, breaking the crowd with the help of the prefects until there was no one left but you two and the professors. You never said a word about what happened, no one ever knew what had you both in such a state; and even after the month's worth of detention you said nothing, not to a Professor or to other students.
People stopped wondering about you two after that.
“It could be a monster.” he said, pointing his finger at the tallest part of the fountain “See, that’s the head of the monster,” his finger lowered, making shapes in the air as he narrated the image in his head “This part here is the splashing water from the sea and all the thicker parts of ice are the tentacles.”
You tilted your head, side glancing between him and the frozen water. He turned his eyes to you, watching as you tried to follow his description. Your eyes widened and you sat straight, turning to him with a smile “Merlin.” you breathed out “You’ve finally lost your mind!”
He glared at you, a smirk forming quickly on his face. You were laughing loudly, holding onto your stomach as you threw your head back, when immediately you rolled back with the force of something hitting you right across the face. You fell with a squeal, the last image that Regulus saw of you being your eyes wide as you flew your arms up in the air trying to hold onto something.
“Regulus. Black.” you muttered, your head barely peeking from behind the mountain of snow you fell over “I’m going to kill you!” you yelled, sitting in the cold snow as you threw a snowball at him, one he easily dodged.
“Try actually hitting me first.” he mocked, the glint in his eyes daring as you jumped to your feet. He had run over the opposite side of the fountain, the both of you mirroring the others movements like a hunter and a prey. Which one were you? That was to be seen.
“Oh, don’t try me.” you said, trying to put on your meanest face which only made Regulus smile widen. In his eyes you were anything but menacing.
But he was too occupied watching you try to be intimidating and you knew that, he never registered the fact that your hands were moving where he could not see them, a snowball on each hand ready to attack. You threw the first one, missing him on purpose to watch him peak his head to mock you, and then, you took your chance.
“Ha!” you yelled in triumph, throwing your hands in the air as the snow stuck to his face and rolled down to his scarf. “Take that, you...NO!” you laughed, starting to run as you saw his face morph into one that let you know he was the hunter.
You ran as fast as you could, not once looking back as you knew it would only slow you down but he was faster, the feeling of his arms coming around your waist and lifting you up the ground only making you scream in delight as he spun you around. Your arms and legs fought in the air to get him to let you go but he had a strong grip on you, so you did the only thing that could save you now, become dead weight.
“What are you doing?” he asked, once you stopped fighting him “Y/N…” But he reacted too late, letting all your weight go onto him, he stumbled back, falling on his back with a thud that only worsened with your weight falling on top of him. “Merlin.” he whispered, his voice out of breath.
You quickly rolled to his side, both of you staring at the sky as you laid on the ground not once minding the snow soaking the back of your clothes, soft smiles on both of your faces as you lived inside the bubble you created. No one could bother you there.
“Want to go to the library?” you asked, turning your face to him. He turned his face to you in thought and you rolled your eyes. As if it was even a question “C’mon.” you said, getting to your feet and helping him as well.
He took hold of your hand and linked your arm with his, starting your walk to the library “Y/N.” he called.
“Yes?” you asked him, not turning to look at him but listening carefully.
“Do you want to go to the Christmas party with me?” he asked.
You turned to look at him, the smile that formed in your face reaching your eyes as you nodded “I would be delighted.” you said “Although, you know it will only fuel the rumor that we are dating, right?” you informed him, raising an eyebrow at him.
He thought about it, his lips in a line as he looked down at you “I’m fine with it if you are.” he said, shrugging his shoulders.
You both nodded in confirmation, continuing your path to the library like it was any other day.
*******
Friday morning came around faster than you ever thought possible, the last day of classes you had to endure and then you were free for weeks. But it also saddened you to leave Regulus behind, even if it was for a couple of weeks, you were sure you would miss him, going from spending time with him everyday to not seeing or hearing anything from him was going to be hard. You could only hope that one day you could celebrate the holidays together.
You had asked your mother if he could visit and she gladly agreed, even your father was eager to know the only friend you cared to mention in your letters. You had jumped and danced when she said Regulus could go home with you, running the halls to find him and tell him the good news. Sadly, he couldn’t go back to your home with you. Walburga Black was very strict with her sons being out of home for the holidays, a celebration for the family and family alone. Regulus color drained from his face at the mere thought of not being home for Christmas, so you didn’t insist. You told your family you would be staying at Hogwarts with Regulus, even if it was a lie, you prefered to be at Hogwarts than spend the entire winter break bored inside the walls of your home.
Officially, the classes ended that day. However, the students who wished to assist to the party were allowed to stay three more days at Hogwarts, until the day the party was being celebrated.
You still had until the party to be with him before you had to go your separate ways.
“Good morning.” you greeted Regulus, going to sit across from him at the end of the Ravenclaw table “You’re up early.” you said, giving him a soft smile.
“More like you’re late.” he said, looking up at you with a knowing look “Let me guess. Five more minutes turned into half an hour?” he asked.
You groaned loudly, rolling your head “Maybe…” you mumbled, glancing between the table and his knowing look. You dropped the fork in your hand with a huff “How do you know?” you asked with a groan.
He shrugged his shoulders “Maybe we’ve developed a mental connection and I can read your mind.” he said, giving you a funny look.
You dropped everything you had in your hands and leaned down on the table, staring into his eyes as he mirrors your movements “Tell me what I’m thinking about. Go.” you said.
Regulus stared deep into your eyes, and as you tried to focus on his gaze your attention drifted, the sound of laughter and the voice that hadn’t left your mind for days making it the more difficult to stay focused. Looking over his shoulder you saw him, standing next to Peter as he wrapped his arm over his shoulder, muttering something in his direction that made all four boys erupted in laughter.
Sirius most have felt your gaze on him, looking over Peter’s shoulder he met your eyes. You felt the air get stuck in your lungs, as natural as the act of breathing, he winked in your way and directed his attention back to his friends like nothing ever happened.
Regulus' voice broke you out of your haze, taking in a deep breath that caught his attention. He stared at you and then turned to where your eyes were glued, the now empty space where not a second ago his brother and his friends stood.
“Are you in shock because I did guess what you were thinking and we did develop a mental connection or you just had a revelation?” he asked “Y/N?” he called for you again.
Wide eyed you stared at him, opening your mouth with no words coming out from it. What had just happened?
Luckily for you, the owls saved you. The sound of wings filling the Great Hall as packages and letters started to drop in front of students. You and Regulus always watched from afar as everyone got their mail, the both of you knowing it was only on Mondays when you got letters. So it came as a surprise when an owl flew over you, dropping a small package in front of you.
As you stared with confusion at the small box, Regulus followed the owl with his eyes “I know that owl.” he muttered before he turned to you once more “What is it?” he asked.
You took the box, turning it in your hands before you shook your head “No.” you said, throwing it to Regulus “You open it.”
“Why me?” he asked, sliding the package back to your side of the table “It has your name in it.” he stated.
You argued back and forth for a couple of minutes before you finally ran out of patience “Fine, I’ll open it.” you grunted, taking the box from him and slamming it on the table.
With quick movements you untied the golden bow that kept it closed, the lid loosening enough so you could take it off. Softly you took it away, staring at the inside for a second too long. A blue rose.
“I think someone is asking you to the party.” Regulus said, his eyes fixed on the Rose.
You moved to look up at him and then back at the small rose. It was beautiful and ...normal. Muggle. A smile was drawn on your face as you picked it up, being a witch you would have expected a show from a gift like that one, to find a charmed rose that flourished right before your eyes but this one was a single normal rose, the more you thought was done to it being the color. Your house color.
You let out a nervous laugh, hiding the Rose before anyone could see it. “Well, that’s too bad for them.” you said, shoving the box inside your bag “Because I already have a date.” you said, smiling tightly at him “And I wouldn’t change it for anything. We will have the best night of our lives so far, we’ll have fun and possibly embarrass ourselves.”
Regulus nodded, but gave no answer to what you had said.
“You know who this is from?” he asked you.
Your eyes snapped up at him and you shook your head “No idea.” you mumbled.
But deep down you knew, looking past Regulus and to the Gryffindor table, grey eyes already staring at you.
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Winter in the Shade
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moonknightly · 3 years
Text
and you keep me holding on : santiago garcia x reader (nine)
Word Count: 2.3k+
Excerpt: “He’s figured out that she thinks she’s dreaming every time she opens her eyes and sees him. She thinks that she’s going to wake up to Nathan and that Santiago will be gone.”
Warnings: Mentions of sexual assault, cursing, uhhh I think that’s it?
[SERIES MASTERLIST]
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OCTOBER FIFTH — DAY TWO
Santi isn’t sure who calls her parents, but they’re in the waiting room the next morning and while he knows that they have every right to be there, he wishes that they would just go away. Her mother is already talking about taking her “home” the second she’s released from the hospital.
He doesn’t have the energy to fight with them yet, doesn’t know how to tell her grieving parents that her home is with him. She belongs with him, he’ll take care of her.
But then again, he’s already failed once.
Maybe she won’t feel safe with him anymore.
Maybe she won’t feel safe in the new apartment, she won’t recognize it. Sure, she’ll look around and see familiar furniture, some pictures and the duvet she’d picked out herself. Nevada. Maybe she’ll smell Santi’s cologne in the air or the stench from the cigarettes he smokes when things get just a little too hard, but it’ll all be in a space that’s entirely new.
Did he make the right decision? Should he have stayed at the last place?
No. No, he doesn’t think that would’ve been smart either.
Maybe she does need to go with her parents, back to the house she grew up in, where her room hasn’t been touched since she was in high school and everything is familiar.
But then she says his name in her sleep, and he knows that he’s not going to be able to let her go.
He knows he can take care of her. He’ll do it right this time, he’ll never let a damn thing happen to her ever again.
So Santi shuts it down the moment her mother brings it up again, and he’s surprised that her father actually sides with him on it. It doesn’t turn into an argument like he thought it would and he’s beyond thankful for that.
She stays asleep for most of the day, only waking up for a little while at a time, and when she does, she refuses to take her eyes off of Santi. It only serves as further confirmation that she needs him, he’s the right decision.
Jay offers to stay with them for a while, thinking maybe they’ll both feel better with another set of eyes, a little added protection, and at first Santi shakes his head — he feels guilty for some reason, he doesn’t know exactly why but he feels like it’s too much.
But then she has a nightmare, and he watches as Jay immediately reaches out and touches her cheeks to let her know she’s not alone, she’s safe and they’re right there. Santi’s positive that Jay has noticed that he hasn’t touched her yet, and he also knows that she probably needs someone who will be able to give her physical reassurance when she wants it.
So he caves, only if Jay will take his bed while he crashes on the couch and of course Jay says no.
But it’s not something they really have to worry or argue about right then.
She’s not going anywhere anytime soon.
OCTOBER SIXTH — DAY THREE
Every single news channel has been covering her return just as much, if not more, as her disappearance. They’re still looking for Nathan, but Santi’s sure they’ll never find him. Not anytime soon, at least.
He didn’t know if he’d dumped her with the intention of her being found alive or dead, but either way he has to know she’s been found and that they’re looking for him again with the same amount of ferocity as they had been when she first went missing. He hates to think about that, how after just a few months everything just seemed to die down for everyone else but those in his little circle, and even then sometimes he felt like the only one who still cared.
Santi shakes his head and pushes those thoughts away.
Her. He just needs to focus on her.
They’d gotten her temperature up, and the cocktail of medicine they’d been pushing for the last three days seem to be doing their job. Her scans all came back clear, no damage to her heart or brain. All in all, she’s responding well to treatment.
She’s still confused though, still disorientated whenever she wakes up but the doctors assure Santi that it’s completely normal and to be expected. He’d asked them how long it would take for her to become lucid and coherent, and they hadn’t really been able to give him an answer.
Could be a few days, could be another week.
But it’s okay, she needs to rest. She needs to rest and Santi needs to get a fucking grip on himself so he can be there for her when she’s finally fully conscious again.
He thinks the nurses have started to notice that he’s keeping his distance, and that they’ve been setting him up to touch her in small ways that he can never really say no to.
“Can you fix her blanket for me?”
“Hold her hand up while I replace the bandage on her IV?”
“Help me slide her over?”
He always does what’s asked of him, but his fingers never linger and he’s managed to do it all without directly touching her skin so far. The sweatshirt she’s in is good for more than just keeping her warm.
But still, he doesn’t really count it as touching her. Direct contact with her body isn’t something he can even imagine right now because he still wants to cry every time he pulls away from her, and he’s only touching a fucking piece of clothing she’s wearing.
Santi needs to get his shit figured out.
It’s not fair to her, not in the least.
So at three in the morning, when he knows it’s going to be another hour before her morning labs are drawn, when he knows that there won’t be a single person in to bother them until then, he gets out of the chair he’s been living in and moves to sit on the end of her bed.
She stirs, and the panic in her eyes is immediate. Her fingers tighten around the blanket and she looks like she’s getting ready to scream or cry out.
He hates it. He hates causing it even though he knows that he’s not really the reason behind it.
He clears his throat and whispers her name, trying his best to keep his voice from wavering.
She blinks, his voice clearly registering in her head though she still looks confused and unsure, but the terror melts away. She knows this is someone safe, someone that she can trust and someone who isn’t going to hurt her. She’s safe.
“Stay.”
“I’m right here, baby.”
She shakes her head and closes her eyes again. “You always leave.”
He’s figured out that she thinks she’s dreaming every time she opens her eyes and sees him. She thinks that she’s going to wake up to Nathan and that Santiago will be gone.
It breaks his heart.
“You’re not dreaming sweetheart. You’re okay.”
She shakes her head again.
“I’m right here,” he repeats, taking a deep breath before he reaches his hand out, but he stops when he’s only an inch away.
There’s no heat radiating from her, and if he wasn’t standing there watching her breathe he’d be thinking the worst.
It finally hits Santi just how small and fragile she is.
And now he feels like if he touches her, he’ll break her.
He pulls his hand back.
He’ll try again tomorrow.
OCTOBER SEVENTH — DAY FOUR
It’s cold and dark and his voice is coming from all around her. He’s calling her name, threatening her with things that she tries so hard to block out but they still creep into her mind, filling her with even more panic and dread as she’s left to think about what he’s going to do to her once he finds her.
Nathan calls it “The Game”.
He gives her a thirty second head start, tells her to run as far and as fast as she can, and if she can get away, she’s free. She can go home.
But if he catches her, his twisted words become a reality. He’ll keep her chained up for a few days, or maybe it’s a couple weeks or even a month, she’s never really sure but then the cycle repeats.
And he always catches her, always. No matter how sure she is that she’s finally escaped, he’s always right there to pin her to the ground and have his way with her. He’s always there to crush her hope and what little faith she’s able to gain back in those brief moments of thinking she’s free.
She shakes her head, trying to clear her mind enough to focus. She needs to get moving.
She looks down to figure out which way she had come and there’s snow. She hates snow. She used to love it, back when her and Santi would go for walks around Christmas time, hot cocoa in hand with their arms linked together. She wonders if he’s put the tree up this year. She wonders if Christmas has already passed.
But per usual, that happy thought of Santiago is ripped away from her when she hears Nathan’s voice again, this time only closer. Her skin crawls.
She has to start running. She knows she’s not as fast as she used to be, she’s too weak, but she has to try.
God, she hates snow.
She never stands a chance. It’s always so easy for Nathan to follow her tracks, and it always feels like there are tiny little needles stabbing into her bare feet with each step she takes, but she doesn’t allow herself to feel it in the moment, no. She never thinks about the pain until The Game is over, because of course she’ll take that moment of pain in trade for freedom. She’ll take those pins in needles if it means she’s just one step closer to getting away.
She thinks she might have it this time. Nathan’s voice is far off again, and she can see something in the distance. A road, maybe.
Yes, a road. That was definitely a car zooming past.
She runs faster, that familiar hope blossoming in her chest. She’s so close, so so close. Just a few more yards-
But then there’s crushing weight on top of her, and rough hands grabbing at her hips and she doesn’t have to look to know who it is.
He found her, of course he found her.
She immediately starts to cry, kicking herself because she should have expected it, she shouldn’t have gotten her hopes so high. All Nathan does is laugh and pull her closer, and then she feels his hand move into her hair. He holds her head up so she can keep her eyes on the road while he gets himself ready to do what he always does.
She tries to just lay there, begging her mind to drift off towards Santi, towards her safe place. When she thinks about him instead of what’s happening, it’s not so bad. Santi makes it all better.
But then another car drives by, and then another, and another and she can’t focus on anything but the fact that she’d been so close. There were people right there, maybe close enough to hear her if she’s loud enough.
She screams.
She wakes up screaming.
She’s screaming and kicking and Santi’s immediately by her side, calling her name, begging her to look at him but she doesn’t hear a thing, doesn’t register it.
He calls out for a nurse, starting to panic, afraid that she’s hurt and in pain but then he hears his name leave her lips in a broken, mangled sob and he knows she must’ve been dreaming.
He wants to cry with her. He hates seeing her like this.
Two nurses rush into the room, trying to get her attention as well but to no avail. They’re asking her what hurts, what happened, but all she can do is thrash around and call out for Santi again.
Hearing her like that, it’s the final push he needs to finally reach out to her.
Santi takes her hand, kissing each of her knuckles once he feels like she’s not going to punch him while he whispers that it’s okay, he’s right here and he’s not leaving her. She’s not with Nathan, she’s not in danger. She’s okay.
She doesn’t calm down, not really, so beyond terrified that Santiago’s voice is nothing but a trick her mind is playing on her, that he is the dream, one her brain had created to block it all out.
He repeats his words a second time, moving one of his hands up to her cheek, and it seems to break her out of it just a little bit more. He brings the second one up so that he’s cupping her face, and he watches as she immediately melts into him.
“You’re okay, sweet girl, it’s okay. It’s me, Santi.”
She doesn’t open her eyes. He wishes she would, but he doesn’t expect her to, not really. She’s so tired and he’s sure crying has left her completely exhausted.
He knows he’s right when her breathing evens out again.
But he doesn’t let go. Now that he’s touched her, he doesn’t want to stop, even though he knows that once she’s coherent it’ll probably be the last thing she wants.
He’ll take it while he can get it though.
He holds her hand all night long.
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bbysamu · 4 years
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It ain’t Me - Part II 
Featuring: KUROO Tetsurou x you ; AKAASHI Keiji x you 
Genre: Angst, fluff
Word Count: 1,090
Warning: mentions of alcohol and drinking 
Now Playing:  It Ain’t Me by Kygo & Selena Gomez
✎ Preview: You and Kuroo were high school sweethearts, you thought your love was as strong as whiskey, burning and sweet. Kuroo is sorry for hurting you, but it might just be a little too late. 
Ch. I
Ch. II
Ch. III
Ch. IV
Ch. V
Epilogue
a/n: no underage drinking please, don’t hinder your brain growth
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Kuroo stood frozen in place, the lingering alcohol clouded his brain, making it all too hard to process what had just happened. He wanted to chase after you, to tell you he’s sorry and he won’t do it again, but his stomach felt nauseous at the mere thought of running. 
He sat down and notices the single pack of Viennese coffee on the kitchen island next to the mug you had gotten him. Kuroo sighs as his mind wanders back to the day you came back from Austria. 
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♫I had a dream We were back to seventeen Summer nights and The Libertines Never growing up ♫
Kuroo looks down at the time on his phone and counted down the minutes. He checks the bright screen above, “AUS 1453 landed at 2:30 pm”, you should be through the gates at anytime. 
He scanned the crowd, before spotting that head of yours. Kuroo thought you looked beautiful even in your sweatpants and his Nekoma hoodie, hair tied up into a messy ponytail, eyes tired from the long flight. 
He called out to you and mentally captures the way your tired eyes twinkled as soon as you spotted him. 
“TETSU!” you ran towards him at full speed, crushing the red roses he got for you. 
“Y/N! you’re gonna crush the roses!” 
The two of you walked hand-in-hand back to his car, chatting the whole time about your time abroad. He smiles as you tell him how you’ve gotten fat from all the Wiener schnitzels you’ve been eating and how Austrian guys were cute but not nearly as cute as him. 
As you both got situated, you suddenly pulled a mug out from your backpack. 
Kuroo raised an eyebrow, “you carried around a mug this whole time?” 
“not just a mug, YOUR mug. It’s for you.” 
He looks down at the string of foreign words.
“der beste Freud der Welt”, you explained proudly, “the best boyfriend in the world”. 
Kuroo felt the blood rushing to his cheeks, even after all these years, he knew his heart would only beat for you. 
“thank you, did you get a corresponding one for yourself?” 
“no, because you have to get me one.” “of course baby and that's a promise”. 
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Kuroo’s eyes widens at the forgotten promise, he never got you a “world’s best girlfriend mug”. 
He hops onto Google and quickly locates a bookstore in Tokyo that sells mugs like this.  Kuroo practically ran to the station. He wanted to get the mug and head over to yours as soon as possible. Your last words echoed in his brain, you would never actually leave him...right? 
He rang your doorbell nervously, when there was no answer, he resorted to desperate measures. He knew where you hid the spare key and opened the door himself. 
“Y/n?” He could hear your quiet sniffling and oddly, the sound of another’s voice.
Kuroo recognizes the voice. 
“Y/n!” He calls out louder this time as you came into view, wrapped under a blanket on the sofa. 
Kuroo completely ignores the man sitting next to you as he falls on his knees. 
“I'm so sorry babe. You were right. The clubs were bad for me and I wouldn’t listen to you. Please don’t give me, don’t give us up.” 
At his words, you started to cry louder. 
Kuroo felt more awake than ever, it was as if he was in a trance this past few months. The other women could never compare to you. 
“Please Y/N, I'm so so sorry. I don’t know what I was doing. Please believe me when I say they all meant nothing”, desperation laced in his voice. 
You finally looked up to meet his eyes. 
“I promise you I will never, ever hurt you again. Look, look at this”, he shoves his hand into the paper bag and pulls out the mug, “remember when you came back from Austria and I promise I'd get you the best girlfriend in the world mug?” 
You nodded slightly. 
“I'm sorry I’m so late on this promise. But I promise I'll keep all our promises from now on. No more tardiness.” 
You look down at the mug and smiled at the irony. Did Kuroo only realize you were the best girlfriend after being with all those other women? 
Kuroo saw the way your eyes softened and knew you might just give him another chance. 
“I’ll make it up to you. I’ll never go to the club again. I love you Y/N, I really really love you.” 
You looked down, eyes watering again, before looking up at him.
“no.” 
Kuroo’s mouth felt dry, “what?” 
You sat up taller, large tears running down your eyes, “I said no because I don’t know how we can ever recover from this. I look at you and all I can see are the images of you and the woman from this morning.” 
“babe, please don’t say that! We’ve gotten through high school and college together, we can get through anything. Please please please don’t say that. Don’t throw us away”. By this point, he was crying as well. 
“How can I throw us away?” 
Kuroo looks up at you. 
“When you’ve already done that a long time ago? I never gave up on us, Kuroo. You did the moment you brought another woman home.”
He couldn’t say anything. 
The man sitting next to you finally broke his silence. 
“I think it’s time for you to leave.” 
Kuroo allowed himself to be led out the door. 
“You really are a piece of trash Kuroo.” Akaashi Keiji said as he closes the door, leaving a shell-shocked Kuroo outside. 
♫ Who's gonna walk you Through the dark side of the morning?  It ain’t me ♫
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Akaashi returns to the living room, sighing internally at the sight of his best friend. 
“He’s not worth your tears.” His heart full of rage as he imagines the way Kuroo’s body pressed up against another while you wait for him at home. 
“you wouldn’t understand Keij, you’ve been single since high school. Kuroo is my best friend, aside from you. I’ve never even imagined life without him...”
Keiji sighs as he pulls you into a hug, feeling your body vibrate with sobs. 
Akaashi was an attractive man. Women often approach him asking him for his number. Yet, Keiji turned them away each time with an apologetic smile, mumbling some excuse about “not really looking for a relationship” or “I'm too busy”. But deep down Akaashi knew the real reason he has been single all this time, and the reason is you. 
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Taglist: @minnieminnie00-got7​
© ceci-chan 2021 all rights reserved. Please do not copy / repost my work on other platforms. 
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milkacchan · 4 years
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Request for anon: Hi! Could you write hcs for poly bakusquad with a quirkless reader who has a serious independent streak but has recently been a target for villain attacks and got injured, but refuses to rely on anyone and tries to ignore their pain and take care of everyone else, please?
This is gonna be a little angsty
• First- it annoyed bakugou that you, someone /quirkless/ made it into the hero class
• On pure fucking spite and anger alone
• You didn't even particularly want to get in to UA
• It was just something you chose to prove someone wrong about
• and it fucking aggravated him- more than aggravated him
• Inspired Deku though, he hated that even more
• and he isn't surebhow- but he ended up talking to you and suddenly you're part of his friend group and he's /okay/ with that
• that irks him too.
• and a lot of things are uncovered when y'all are friendly w eachother
• and they learn pretty fucking fast about your independent streak
• and when you all started dating (crazy how they managed that) they thought it might go away- only it didn't.
• You never asked for help, regardless of what it was- you'd handle it on your own.
• You got hurt during training? Don't worry about it, I'm fine.
• Failed a test? You'd disappear for a few days to study and retake it.
• Didn't know what you were doing in a particular subject? You'd teach it to yourself.
• Aizawa had heard the words 'help' ONCE and he was limited to the help you'd allow him to give you .
• You trained your ass off everyday, you worked hard in school, you took no shit- it was obvious you felt like you had something to prove.
• Bakugou felt like he was a partial reason for that and it made him feel like shit.
• He wasn't exactly the kindest to you when classes started in first year.
• But he was concerned.
• They were all concerned.
• recently, you'd been stressed out. They could tell, even if you weren't giving them signs.
• On top of that, you'd become a big target for villains and no one knew why.
• it seemed like both you and midoryia were a magnet for assholes in masks
• And they tried talking to you about it, they do.
• Denki brings it up, he's holding your hand, Kirishima is threading his fingers through your hair and Seros behind you, holding your waist. Mina is in between your legs, resting her head on your chest and bakugou is at the end of the bed.
• And Denki asks if you need help- whether its coping with it- or dealing with it while its happening- or trying to figure out /why/ they're attacking you
• and you blow him off "it doesn't matter, i'll deal with it if it happens again."
"It's not a matter of if, it's a matter of when." Bakugou glares.
"Okay, then when it happens again, I'll deal with it."
"That's fucking stupid," he growls.
Kami squeezes your hand gently. "Maybe we should have a plan-" he glares at Bakugou.
"I was fine last time. Don't do this."
"Do what? Offer fucking help?" Bakugou snaps and Mina cringes. She grips your shirt. She knows what's going to happen, she knows you're going to stomp off to think- it could be a few hours or it could be days. Sometimes, if she held something on you, you'd stay. She hoped this was the case.
"Your fucking pity." You seeth. "I don't need it. I can take care of myself."
"Baby we didn't-" kiri starts but you're already sliding off the bed.
"Babe," Sero looks at you. "please come talk about it,"
You say nothing, and let the door close behind you.
"Fuck." Mina sighs
• Its 2 days.
• 2 days before you resurface, calm and collected, like nothing happened.
• but you're busy- you're training harder. Much harder, you're pushing yourself past your limits and its obvious
• they were already impressed. Theg already knew you could take care of yourself. Why couldn't you see that?
• you push and push and push
• and they don't see as much of you
• when they do see you at the end of the night, you always look exhausted
• and you put on the same fucking front each time
• you smile and laugh and kiss them goodnight but they can see you're in pain
• they don't even get a chance to talk about it with you
• because the next thing they know
• theyre in another attack and youre in the center of it
• You're fighting and you're holding him off but you aren't going to last much longer
• You were tired from the day before- you hadn't gotten proper sleep- and he was strong
• It's all kind of a blur, really, you're thrown a lot, youre bleeding
• he had you by the neck at the end, you were clawing at his hands and he was laughing
• your mates weren't exactly in the best shape either- after all, the attack had happened in the middle of the night
• A strong kick to the center of his nose seemed to do the trick. There was a sickening crack and his hand loosened and he fell back.
• When you regained youre senses you froze- he wasn't breathing.
• you /killed/ him.
• Your stomach churned and suddenly all the pain you felt increased ten fold.
• You scrambled to stand up, Mina was the first one you saw and you fell to your knees in front of her, cupping her cheeks. "Baby? Baby you okay?"
"M fine, but you're not, that's a lot of blood." She looked up at you her eyes wide. "Baby that's a lot-"
"I'm okay, I promise."
• She wanted to yell and scream and you, she wanted to hit you and telling to just accept help but you'd already stood up, moving to look around for the others.
• Denki was next, you met him with a hug and a short but desperate kiss. "You okay?" You whisper, brushing your thumb over his bruised cheek. Mina was behind you now, gently brushing her fingers through the blondes hair, but she stepped away when she saw Kiri and Bakugou.
"I'm okay, I'm okay," he smiked softly.
"Eiji? Katsu?" You mumbled.
"They're okay, they're fine. You don't look so good though."
"M- M okay.." you mutter. Youre tired now. Standing here is nice. You're dizzy- Ashido was right. That was a lot of blood.
Your eyes close and your weight falls.
"Hey- Hey- Jesus! Guys! Katsuki! I don't- I can't tell if she's breathing-"
• You wake up in the hospital 2 days later.
• Mina's in the bed with you, hand thrown gently over your thighs. Sero and Denki are on the left side, heads down, eye's closed and arms over your shin.
• Kiris got your left hand in his, another hand in Minas hip.
• Bakugous on the right side, arms crossed and head down.
• and youre confused because why the fuck are you here?
• what happened?
• you miss Katsukis voice next to you when it all comes back
• and you can't help but scramble to sit up and suddenly you can't breathe
• youre not sure how long you zoned out, but when you finally get back, there's two nurses
• ones replacing and IV bag
• and the other is checking your tempature, you think.
• theres another needle stick in your arm but you can't pay mind to it right now.
• the warmth around you was gone and you desperately wanted it back.
• they weren't in the room anymore
• and when the nurses cleared the room, the tears spilled over.
• your brought your hands to cover your face and your head fell back.
• five minutes? 10 minures? Later there was a gentle tap on your shoulder
• it was ashido
• your arms were around in her seconds
• "You okay?" She whispered as the others took their spots around the bed.
"No," you shook your head. "I killed him- and and I could've gotten you guys hurt because I didn't listen," your breathing had started to get faster again.
"Hey, it's okay. Just breathe," she soothes, thumbs stroking your cheeks.
"I can't- I- fuck /help me/-" you gasp out
• It takes awhile, but they managed to calm you down.
• Ashido just holds you, she lets you cry, and Kiri reminds you that you're okay
• they do most of the comforting usually
• when you're breath has finally started to even out, and you can feel the pain again, you know you'll be asleep soon from the pain meds.
"How bad was it?" You whisper, hands still gripling Minas shirt.
"Bad." Katsuki spoke. "You stopped breathing when we got you here."
Sero rubbed his face. "You needed a blood transfusion. They weren't entirely sure how it was going to end."
"You were...you were just standing in my arms and then you weren't moving. And then you weren't answering-" denki breathed. "There was blood everywhere."
"What about you guys?"
"Can you just stop?" Katsuki groaned. "Can you just let us worry about /you/? Let us help. Don't ask about us. You almost /died/ and your only fucking thought is us. Why?" He was crying, head down, hands gripping his pants.
"He's got a point. It's okay to ask for help," kirishima whispers. "So why don't you?"
• you're quiet for a few moments.
• do you go into detail.
• or do you dodge the question.
• ultimately, the fear of losing them outweighed any shame you would have felt
• "its hard not having a quirk." You mumble, eyes down. "Quirks are practically currency. And power is highly valued. I don't have that. I don't have any of that. I'm in a constant risk of being replaced and if I ask for help, they know I'm weak. I can't ask for help."
• And they all feel their hearts shatter a little bit.
• Bakugou had poked fun at you for quite some time in first year for not having a quirk.
• and Denki wasn't much better- neither was Sero. They'd make jokes about how fast you'd drop out.
• Bakugou would break a little bit, reminding you that you weren't weak. You still being alive was proof of that.
• and slowly
• slowly you get accustomed to ask for help.
• its not necessarily with words- sometimes they ask and you just nod
• or you ask in your own way.
• youre independent streak remains- but its not as bad.
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