Tumgik
#it becomes so much harder to find people your age who are on the same journey to be able to talk through things with
lovieku · 2 days
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obvious ⋆ jeon jeongguk
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you lose your virginity to jeongguk, the only boy you’d ever trust with such weight. and what you both feel for each other couldn’t be more obvious.
based on this ask
pairings: bookstore employee!jk x virgin!fem reader
genre: smut, strangers to friends to lovers
ratings: +18 / mdi
warnings: lower case intended, porn with some plot, mutual pining, age gap (4 years), first time, dry humping, tit play (small boobs lover jk!!!), oral (f receiving), fingering, hand job, size kink, protected sex, missionary, cowgirl, multiple orgasms, dirty talk, sooo much praise, and pet names, jeongguk is so so loving and caring, sm fluff hehe, bit of angst maybe? but lovey dovey confession <33
word count: 12.9k
a/n: aaaa this is so silly and rushed but theyre so cute and i had to do something about it. ps: this is my first time writing smut, hope it’s not embarassing Help ..any feedback is appreciated 👩🏻‍💻
you met jeon jeongguk at your favorite bookstore. the one tucked away in the quieter part of town, hidden in the shadow, squeezed between a small café and a vintage shop with an unassuming facade. it’s not the kind of place that draws crowds, most people passed it without a second glance, without paying it the attention it deserved.
but you always did, too attentive for your own liking, too curious for your own sake. you had always been the type to notice the quiet places where stories seem to breathe.
there was nothing not to love about the store. it felt like a refuge in tones of deep brown wood and soft amber light. it wasn’t flashy, but that’s why you loved it. stepping inside always brought a sense of calm, brought you closer to feel the whisper of worn leather bindings, the smell of old pages. it was being understood, accepted, seen.
meeting jeongguk wasn’t fate. it wasn’t some serendipitous moment ripped from a movie script. you didn’t bump into him while too immersed in your favorite novel. you didn’t reach simultaneously for the same book and argued over it, only to end up in the café next door.
jeon jeongguk was simply working there. he was an employee at the bookshop, stocking shelves, checking inventory. he just so happened to be charming, and the only one who came up to you after you’d been standing in front of a high shelf for what felt like an eternity.
“looking for anything in particular?”
when you turned to follow the source of the honey voice, not too low but still smooth, you had to fight hard to keep the gasp that was threatening to escape locked in your throat. he was tall. way taller than you. his dark hair fell in soft curls, brushing the nape of his neck, framing his face with carefully crafted, but effortlessly beautiful curtains. and when you managed to escape his wide eyes, seemingly storing all the warmth the shop could offer, you found it even harder to contain the surprise as you spotted a trail of intricate ink designs starting from his hand and running up his muscled arm, only to disappear beneath the short sleeve of his black polo.
he was still staring, expectantly. and you just kept standing there, mute. observing like a maniac. you stumbled over your words, trying to steady your voice, “oh— um. i was looking for the japanese author, kawamura?”
the way his eyes lit up at your request was unmistakable. and after that, the same spark would flicker in his gaze every time you stepped foot in the shop.
you later found out that he was new, which explained why you hadn’t noticed him before, all the times you’d gone and searched for books. which weren’t a lot, but enough for the other staff to know your face through the years. and now, certainly enough for jeongguk to become acquainted with your presence.
you started finding excuses to go more often, week after week, convincing yourself that you needed new books to accompany your tea as the colder months approached. truth be told, it wasn’t just the books pulling you in. your friends kept teasing you about the real reason why you’d always hurry there after your lectures ended, and deep down you knew you just had to accept it. you were developing a silly, little crush.
jeongguk didn’t seem to mind the growing frequency of your visits. if you had to guess, you’d say he was just as eager to see you. or maybe he was just exceptionally good at his job. if that were the case, you hoped he was crowned employee of the month every single time.
there was always a line he never crossed. his professionalism remained intact. he greeted you like any other customer, offering his help when you needed it. and you always seemed to need it, didn’t you? yet, there was something in the way his eyes crinkled at the corners when you smiled, the way his lips curved in that subtle, almost hidden way when you left with a new book in hand. you’d walk out of the store, clutching your latest literary find, grinning like a fool, and jeongguk would watch, his own smile lingering long after you were gone.
deep down, you knew this couldn’t last forever. you were just a student, miserably scraping by in the tiniest flat imaginable, your waitressing part-time job barely paying enough to make it through the month. but you’d feel bad, wasting hours of jeongguk’s shift, monopolizing his time with your indecision over paperbacks, keeping him off his tasks, just for it to be a waste. you needed to show him your gratitude, in a way. contribute to the income of the bookshop. so, you kept buying books. you weren’t sure you even had more space to fit them in your own shelf.
yet no matter how much you tried to convince yourself to stay away, you couldn’t help it. books were your escape, your joy, and the fact that they were sold to you by jeongguk was just an added bonus. the problem wasn’t him— it was your wallet. your poor, overworked wallet that kept reminding you of the price of each novel and how your little crush was becoming financially unsustainable.
it was one of those afternoons after your morning lectures, where the crisp autumn air made you even more eager to slip into the bookstore, feeling that familiar rush of warmth as jeongguk greeted you with his usual smile. this time, he surprised you with a book he had found just for you, claiming “you’d enjoy it. feels light and genuine, just like you.”
when it came time to pay, cheeks still flushed after the sickly, sweet grin he flashed your way, you sighed as you rummaged through your bag for your card.
he scanned it, only to glance up at you with a hesitant expression, “huh… it declined.”
“what?” you laughed, though it was shaky, disbelief lacing your words, “no, that can’t be right. try again.”
he did, but the outcome remained unchanged. he met your eyes with a worried frown, and you felt your face flame in embarrassment, not the one that made your insides swarm with butterflies minutes before this.
you groaned, pressing your palm to your forehead in mortification, “fuck, this is so humiliating.”
jeongguk chuckled softly, his voice soothing, “hey, it’s really not. it’s okay. i’ll pay for it.”
your jaw dropped, and you looked at him like he had lost his mind, “no, what? are you crazy? don’t— don’t do that. you don’t need to. i’ll just come back another day.”
what followed was a ridiculous, playful back-and-forth. you refused, he insisted, and soon enough, the two of you were locked in a silly tug-of-war over the book itself, laughing despite the situation. he finally threw his hands up in surrender, his smile impossibly wide, the kind of grin that made your heart skip a beat.
“alright, alright,” he relented, shaking his head, “but i’m still not happy about this. if i can’t pay for your book, at least let me buy you a coffee. i’m clocking off in 15. will you wait for me?”
you couldn’t contain your eyes from widening, your smile to dumbly paint your features as you eagerly nodded. you didn’t trust yourself to speak, afraid that if you did, some ridiculous teenage squeal would escape. he was grinning just as hard, though.
and so, you began seeing jeongguk outside the confined space of the bookstore, in a world beyond the shelves and spines of novels. his attire was always simple, dark tones that exuded comfort and warmth. his sweaters seemed soft enough to curl into, and his presence felt just as inviting.
but you pushed those thoughts away, trying to remind yourself that he was becoming a friend. one of your closest, even. you tried. you did! but you just couldn’t help the way your mind wandered, imagining what it would be like to lean just a little closer, to feel the warmth of his embrace. god, get a grip.
still, it was impossible to ignore the flutter in your chest each time his eyes lingered a little longer than necessary. outside the bookstore, jeongguk was different. not in a bad way. he was just more relaxed, more himself. his touch came naturally, a hand at the small of your back guiding you through a crowded street, his arm slung casually over your shoulders like it belonged there. he was playful in a way that hinted at something deeper, his jokes sometimes drifting into uncharted territory, leaving your stomach in knots, your thoughts spiraling down paths you hadn’t dared explore.
and then there was the way he looked after you. he was older, just by a few years, 25 to your 21, but it felt like a gulf of experience separated the two of you. he’d seen more, lived more. experienced more. knew more. about all that stuff you’d been scared to explore, the stuff that happened in the intimacy of one’s bedroom. you knew he had his fair share of girlfriends, he told you about it. just how you’d told him you never got close to a relationship. you just flirted around with a boy in high school, messily making out in the corners where no one could see you. but it never went over that.
jeongguk’s protectiveness over you came naturally. you didn’t mind. it was reassuring, the way his hand tightened around your wrist in a crowded space or how his gaze followed you across a room, always making sure you were safe.
you found yourself spending more and more time together. walking through the city, staying up late at cafés, or just wandering aimlessly in his car, talking about everything. you told him about your classes, the stress of exams, your dreams of becoming a teacher, and the uncertainties that weighed you down. he listened, really listened, in a way that made you feel seen, like every word you said mattered.
jeongguk shared his own story too. he’d dropped out of college a year ago, deciding that the path everyone else had planned for him wasn’t for him at all. now, he was drifting, trying to figure out where he belonged. he took inspiration in the way your eyes sparkled at the prospect of your future. little did he know, your eyes just reflected the galaxies in his that you loved getting lost into.
it terrified you. because with each passing day, your feelings for him grew stronger, more undeniable. it wasn’t just a crush anymore. it was something that had its own weight, pulling you closer to him. the lines were blurring, but you let them.
one night, after a long week of classes and stress, you went out with a few friends. jeongguk hadn’t been able to join, caught up with work, but when your tipsy self had dialed his number later that night, he picked up right away. your voice was soft, your words slurred. they echoed through the bar’s bathroom, followed by your uncontainable giggles as jeongguk playfully scolded you on the other line. the same softness was painting his face, and he only hung up when he started his car, showing up within minutes.
by the time he arrived, you were well past tipsy and leaning dangerously toward drunk. you didn’t notice him sheepishly greeting your group of friends, their eyes lighting up with interest at the image of the renowned jeon jeongguk, until his low voice called your name, slipping his arm around your waist and helping you up from the bar stool, “come on, let’s get you home. say bye-bye.”
you glared at him, face slightly reddening at his tease. he just loved treating you like a little kid. loved poking fun at you. still, you leaned into him, the scent of his body wash wrapping around you like a comforting blanket, banter ready on your tongue, “i’m fine, grandpa,” you slurred amusedly, but your legs wobbled as you tried to walk.
he chuckled under his breath, guiding you out of the bar, “yeah, sure you are. you’re barely standing.”
the night air was cold against your skin, but jeongguk was warm, his body solid and steady as you clung to him.
you didn’t mean to say it, didn’t mean to let the words slip, but in your hazy, alcohol-fueled state, you genuinely wondered, “why are you so good to me?”
he paused for a moment, glancing down at you with a small smile, “because you deserve it.”
the car ride was silent, in a comfortable way. you got lost in the way the city flashed past you, and jeongguk stole sneaky glances at you from the corner of his eye, his hand gripping the steering wheel a little tighter each time he let his eyes linger.
when he reached your place, he helped you inside, gently guiding you to the couch. you were too dazed to fight him when he insisted on getting you some water and a blanket. he moved around your cramped flat with ease, having memorized where every single thing belonged after his countless stays at your place, watching movie after movie or simply keeping you company while you revised.
he sat beside you for a while as you rambled on about your night, how the music was slightly disappointing even with the drinks being overpriced.
jeongguk listened attentively, even with your words stumbling out in messy fragments, jumping from one topic to another. his eyes traced the way your hands moved in wild gestures, the way your lips fumbled for the right words, the glaze in your eyes reflecting the soft glow of the room. he didn’t realize it at first, but his body instinctively followed your movements, leaning closer with every excited wave of your arms, his knees brushing against yours, his head nodding in time with your words.
only when you stopped talking, turning to face him and catching his gaze in the dim light, he was made aware of the little distance between you. it wasn’t unusual for the two of you to be this close. always sneakily seeking for one another in booth seats of the pubs you’d visit every so often, his hand lingering on your knee for longer than needed when calling for your attention, your arms locking together when walking through the city.
but this moment was different. it was heavy with something unspoken. and so tender, fragile.
your cheek rested on the back of the couch, your body slouched, your eyes half-lidded. he sat straight, his torso turned towards you, his head bending down to study your face better.
you didn’t think when you blurted his name out, your gaze falling on his lips, “jeongguk.”
he hummed softly.
“i want you to kiss me.”
the words tumbled out before you could stop them, but you didn’t take them back. you couldn’t.
jeongguk didn’t seem startled by your unfiltered words. he didn’t flinch, didn’t pull back. he only tilted his head slightly, the corner of his lip inching up sweetly, “you want me to kiss you?”
you hummed, with the same softness, only tinted with uncertainty. fear of rejection. you were suddenly aware of what you asked him now that he repeated it back to you. and you realized how much you meant it, just now.
but his tone wasn’t condemning. it was seeking for confirmation that he heard right, that it wasn’t just your drunk thoughts talking. still, he didn’t lean closer, nor let his eyes fall to the lower part of your face.
he spoke, his voice barely above a whisper, “i’ll kiss you. just not now.”
”what? why not?”
your eyebrows were cutely furrowed, the blush the alcohol painted you with only making the pout on your lips even more irresistible.
jeongguk hissed amusedly, ”because you’re drunk. and when i’ll kiss you, i want you to be sure about it. want you to remember it.”
”but i am sure about it. i want you.”
once again, your blunt confession didn’t seem to faze him. he smiled, kept his tone low, ”i know. i want you too.”
your breath hitched at the unexpected sincerity of his words, your eyes roaming all over his face. you subtly shifted closer, your lips parted slightly with desire. the flame that lit up your body burned all the alcohol from your system, and suddenly you were more awake than ever. you were alert. your heart pounding, your core pulsing. he looked so inviting, so pretty in that light.
he wet his lips, darting his tongue out to play with his piercing. you could feel your head spin. you didn’t just want him. you needed him. and it wasn’t the alcohol. you were sure of it.
you could only dumbly lean closer and hope for the best, but he chuckled softly, his large hand framing the side of your face and forcing you to stop your path towards him, look at him, swim in the intensity of his gaze.
his tone was gentle, delicate, understanding, “if you don’t change your mind, we’ll talk about this tomorrow, okay? when you’re sober. hm?”
his eyes searched yours, waiting patiently for your response. you only managed a small nod, your eyes glossy with frustration and a bit of shame. you bit your lip, muttering a small okay and letting him fix your hair with the fondest look in his orbs.
he left your flat only after tucking you in your bed, because you begged him to, and after much more pleading, you even convinced him to stay beside you until you fell asleep. you didn’t feel him slip out of your hold on his hand, the weight of his body leaving your bed, and with it, the warmth of his presence going as well.
but the following day, after downing the glass of water you assumed he left by your nightstand, you bore through your headache and searched for his contact in your phone first thing as you woke up. you were instantly hit with flashes of the night before, and you remembered exactly what you told him, what he promised. that if you still wanted it, you would talk about it. and you just needed to hear his voice, as soon as possible.
you’re not sure what there was to talk about. you asked him for a kiss. his lips on yours. it’s not like there would be much space for talking.
with your phone to your ear, the ringback tone was the only sound filling the space between your thoughts. you felt a twinge of anxiety in your stomach. you should have probably called later, let yourself adjust to consciousness. maybe rationalize yesterday’s events and find a better way to move around them. give yourself more time to think it over. the wait stretched on, and it only gave your doubts more space to spiral, turn into little monsters whispering evil things in your ear.
he probably wanted to talk to you about it because he thought it was a stupid idea. he didn’t really want it, was just lying to get you to shut up. he thought you were foolish, childish, not his type at all. or maybe, he was seeing someone and didn’t know how to tell you. wow, that would be humbling. you wanted him so bad and he was just—
“hello?”
his voice sounded muffled through the line. you clumsily adjusted your device to your ear, sitting up, still in your bed, last night’s makeup smudged under your eyes, “jeongguk?”
”that would be me, ma’am.”
“hi,” your voice was low, thick with sleep and the remnants of your hangover, and it sounded weaker than you’d intended to reveal.
”hey. feeling better, miss?”
his playful tone was laced with affection, and it instantly put a smile on your face. you didn’t realize it, but your mind was clearing, your body unconsciously easing back into the covers, “i am.”
jeongguk hummed, and you heard the faint sound of movement on his end. he was probably getting ready for the bookstore, but still found time to pick up your call. it made you alert, awkwardly aware of what both of you were probably expecting out of this conversation.
you cleared your throat, smoothing some of the morning grogginess and sounding lighter, softer, “come over after your shift? i miss the office. and your ramyeon.”
when he chuckled in your ear and teased you for that one time you said his cooking was average, you felt your shoulders relax. even more when he agreed and shot you a quick see you later, followed by the exaggerated sound of smacking lips.
it was his signature goodbye, always ending your calls with that. it would usually make you roll your eyes, a grin tugging at your lips. but this time, it made you blush like a pubescent teenager. get. a. grip.
jeongguk noticed the slight shift in your demeanor right away. he could taste the tension, smell it in the air, feel it in the way you’d become stiff, even when his fingers barely grazed your skin. it was a stark contrast to how things had been between you two.
you still moaned around the first bite of his ramyeon, still giggled with your mouth full as he mockingly mimicked your voice, playfully downgrading his cooking skills from months ago. but you blushed a little harder at the smirk that followed his usual tease. subtly ran away from his hand seeking your contact.
with time, both of you had grown comfortable with the casual touches, playful proximity— tickling at each other’s sides, poking jokingly, or simply brushing hands when no one was looking. it had become a natural part of your dynamic.
but after your earlier slurred confessions, he could tell that it was affecting you more deeply now, your body reacting differently to his touch. the way you startled at his closeness, the small breath catching in your throat. it all made his head spin, his fist tighten in restraint. you weren’t the only one affected.
on your couch, you found it hard to relax in his familiar embrace, an arm around your shoulders, your head resting on his chest. the steady rhythm of his breathing usually soothed you, but tonight, your heart was fighting its way up, dangerously close to spilling all over his neat clothes. you exhaled shakily, the office playing quietly on the tv doing a weak job at distracting you.
and jeongguk couldn’t take it anymore. lust wasn’t the only feeling simmering under the surface. he was scared. that he may have read it all wrong, that you only blurted it out because you were drunk and not in control of your thoughts. he was terrified of stepping the wrong way, doing something that would determinately scare you away, end whatever you two had for good. and he didn’t want to lose you. wanted to keep you. and that went over the need to taste your lips.
through the corner of your eye, you could feel him stare down at you intently. his other hand reached to move your hair out of the way, and you let him. you turned to meet his gaze, and relaxed slightly at the fond look on his features.
“what’s going on in that pretty, little head of yours? will you tell me?”
you blinked. gulped down loudly. the reassuring smile on his face grew bigger. you shifted slightly in his hold, moving your body to face him, and the arm that was around you naturally fell down your waist.
you tried to word it differently, tried to suppress it just a bit longer, find another way around it, but his blown out pupils lowered all your inhibitions, “do you— do you still want to kiss me?”
“i do. very badly.”
his response was immediate, and it came through a whisper. it caressed your face sweetly, and it made you aware of the natural gravity that pulled you even closer, to the point of your noses almost touching.
you were unable to move, to initiate anything, to be truthful to your desires. your orbs jumped on every corner of his face, widening. he let his palm close around your hip, then he spoke low, “will you let me do that?”
jeon jeongguk kissed you slowly. his lips lingered on yours, tasting, moving with intent. his hands framed your face, traveling down your neck and holding you gently by the nape.
it was sweet, and delicate. he took his time becoming acquainted with your pace, letting you control the movement of his doings. when he darted his tongue out to trace your lower lip, you granted him permission to explore the insides of your mouth.
with tongues intertwined, the kiss gradually became sloppier, more desperate. your fingers found home in his long curls, tugging at the base of it, and supporting yourself while arching your body into his, pressing yourself against his chest, seeking for confirmation that he wanted this just as badly as you did.
he welcomed your proximity by letting his palms fall to your waist, keeping you close, and tracing his touch dangerously close to the curve of your ass.
you whined lowly, but the sounds became ingloriously louder the more he pressed your body against his hard one, his touch wandering, squeezing, feeling.
you messily straddled his lap and sat with your knees on both sides of him, your desire deepening with your kiss, devouring his lips harder, twisting his hair in a confused tangle the more you got lost in them.
his hands went to hold your hips, and you soon felt a stronger weight on them, gently pulling you away and giving you a minute to catch your breath. though it was taken out of you the moment you took in the man in front of you, his lips swollen, his eyes half-lidded, his curls all over the place.
he let out an amused chuckle, combing through your own mess on your head, “hey, pretty. it’s okay. there’s no rush. we can take it slow, hm?”
in that small moment, you were made aware of your own eagerness slipping out of your control and rushing your actions, insatiable with wanting more, but not even being sure if jeongguk wanted that more just as much.
instead, you were sure your whole face was a crimson shade with the way the boy under you fondly grinned, his hand guiding you by the nape and letting your lips meet again in a small peck, before he focused on your face again.
jeongguk never left your eyes, and you were too hypnotized to even think of looking elsewhere. his gaze was steady, magnetic, thirsty to drink in your reaction as he guided your hips against him, letting them drag over his clothed bulge. you moaned, unshameful, your eyes rolling back.
”yeah? you like that?”
you could only nod dumbly, repeatedly, using your hands on his shoulders as support while you kept grinding on him. slowly at first, just how he had suggested. but the stimulation was too good, your clit deliciously meeting his hardness, spreading the embarrassing amount of wetness you had already collected all over your panties. you tentatively picked up your pace, his hands immediately stopping you.
”you need to be patient, doll.” his scold was only playful, the smirk spreading on his features letting you know he enjoyed the effect he had on you, the way he bit his lip communicating he was just as affected. but you liked the feeling of him guiding you through this.
you didn’t know what to do, weren’t sure how to please him, too shy under his adoring look. you sheepishly smiled, falling onto him and hiding yourself in the crook of his neck.
he laughed, his chest moving with it, and you could feel his heart pumping, his warmth meeting the side of your face. he took the hand on your waist and dragged it up your back, soothingly, “you’re doing so good, baby. okay?”
it was sweet, and the praise made you pulse around nothing. you nodded, your nose brushing against his neck as you timidly let your lips leave a trace of wet kisses along his adam’s apple, going up his jaw. he hummed, the sound reverberating in his throat and against your mouth.
you left small pecks on his cheek, to his nose, retreating after laying a quiet one on his mouth. you looked back at him, jumping between his eyes, confession tumbling out your tongue, “sorry. i just want you so bad.”
he chuckled, moving your bangs out of your face, “i want you just as much. but i don’t want this moment to be fast. want to make it special for you.”
his whispered words tugged at the strings of your poor heart. you felt it begging to be ripped out of your chest, banging on your rib cage, maybe trying to find another way up your throat. but its repeated, quick pumping also matched the need pooling down your lower belly, staining your panties.
you nodded, finding his lips again and deepening the kiss, adapting to a slower rhythm as your tongues fervently explored each other. he grabbed your sides and grinded you closer to him, moaning in your mouth as you matched his gentle guiding, meeting the involuntary buck of his hips.
the almost too tender drag of your clothed pussy against his clothed, hard cock soon became torturous for the both of you, reduced to panting, eager messes. you felt unashamedly close just from the repeated action, and if he hadn’t decided to lay you on your back just then, you were sure you would have cummed already.
he was gentle as he positioned you on the couch, your body sprawled while he was mindful not to put too much of his weight on you. when he left your lips, you instinctively whined. your head subtly lifted off the sofa to try and follow his mouth, bring it back on yours, but he only smirked and darted his tongue out to lick off your taste.
he didn’t give you time to protest, to miss his touch, to be left unattended. because he quickly moved to work on your neck, his tattooed hand tentatively seeking its way under your t-shirt.
you let him wander. let him leave wet traces from your jaw down your collarbones while his fingers left goosebumps along their path, and rose up to your chest. he hummed at the feeling of your bare breasts, smirking at the absence of a bra.
he felt the skin under it, only for his palm to cup your boob and knead at it. it was a perfect fit in his large hand, his thumb teasingly slicing over your nipple and making you mewl, arching your back and pushing your front into him.
he moved himself from your neck and hesitantly lifted up your shirt, searching your eyes for permission. you put your hands on his and led them to take it off you, discarding it on the ground.
he sat back on his heels, admiring your figure laying between his legs. in his eyes, you found something you were never met with until that moment.
he looked starved, his pupils blown and following every curve of your body, his hands hovering only to end up caressing your sides delicately.
you blushed, hard, using your hand to cover your face and throwing an arm over your chest. his palms squeezed your hips twice, his thumbs stroking the skin under your ribs, “don’t hide from me, pretty. let me see you.”
you shook your head stubbornly, a small whine escaping your throat. but he could tell you weren’t starting any fight, he could make out your smile, barely concealed under your fingers.
jeongguk moved your wrists and laid them on top of your head, his face nearing again to leave an adoring kiss on your lips. when he found your eyes again, the fondest smile was painting his features, “you’re beautiful.”
“my boobs are small,” your voice was muffled, shy, hidden behind your childish pout.
“i fucking love them,” with one hand still keeping your wrists together, he used the other one to play with your breasts once more, his gaze hypnotized by the way he could make them fit in his large palm, squeezing them together and kneading at the softness.
you moaned, loud and unashamed, when he guided his smooth lips to your nipple, his gaze never leaving yours while he attempted small, kitten licks at it.
when he saw how your eyes lustfully rolled back as his fingers went to play with your other boob, rolling it and letting his thumb slide over the sensitive center, he took it as his go-ahead to wholly engulf your wet nipple in his mouth and suck on it, lick around it, kiss it.
jeongguk was hastily making out with your tits, giving both of them the attention they needed, reducing your nipples to soaked, hard messes.
you felt your soul ascend high and leave your body when, as you unconsciously thrusted your hips up in desperate need of friction, you found that in his knee, the one that was positioned between your legs, the one you now grinded into with no control over your pace, bringing yourself closer to the edge.
“fuck, jeongguk,” you didn’t have time to feel ashamed over how delirious you sounded, or looked, the lewd noises of his sucking taking you even higher, his hands massaging your boobs with intent.
you only got louder the more you let your cunt rub against his leg, a motion you were unable to slow down, too eager to get to the finish line. and this time, jeongguk let you, even spurring you on, “let go, angel. cum on my thigh.”
it was all the encouragement you needed to fully loosen, his own whines resounding against your chest and blending with your high-pitched moans, eyes rolled back, head thrown to the side, fingers clutching around jeongguk’s locks and guiding him further into you as you lost control on his thigh, “gonna cum!”
your orgasm took over your whole body, shaking with overwhelment at the stimulation. all the sensations you were feeling were new to you, but nonetheless welcomed in the way your eyelids drooped with relaxed pleasure and you worked to catch your breath, your muscles untightening, your arms falling by your sides.
jeongguk left one last kiss around your nipple before lifting himself up to admire your fucked out state, your cheeks flushed and sweat adorning you with an angel-like glow, the lazy smile on your face as you stared at him making his heart skip a few beats.
he let his eyes wander, his own expression incredulous at what had just happened, “that was so fucking sexy, baby.”
the way you sheepishly chuckled was contagious, his giggles filling your ears as he lifted you up and pulled you against his chest, your still weak body falling onto him with ease. he smiled fondly, looking down at your face, “if you want to stop here, it’s totally okay. i won’t—“
“no!” your energy came back to you as quickly as it left your body minutes before, sitting up straight in his embrace with your eyes wide and worried. you fumbled with your words, “no— no. i want to keep going. please.”
the grin that took over his features adorably caused his nose to scrunch, and he had to put his lips on yours and let them blend together in a sickly sweet kiss to keep himself from saying the words that were so dangerously close from spilling, on the tip of his tongue. he hoped, as he slid it against yours, that you could still feel them, and accept them.
he retreated to cup your cheek in his palm, your eyebrows still unconsciously drawn up in agitation, but easing as he reassured you, “you don’t have to beg, angel. i’ll give you anything you ask for.”
”okay. couch is uncomfortable. take me to the bedroom,” your arms stretched out, teasingly expecting him to pick you up.
you squealed when he did, taking your legs, wrapping them around his tiny waist and getting up the sofa, leading both of you to your room. he didn’t have to watch where he was going, his feet automatically guiding him, having adjusted to your flat long ago. but even if that weren’t the case, he would still not look, too caught up in your glossy orbs.
he pinched your sides before laying you on the soft surface of your bed, legs still tight around him, “bossy much, hm?”
you shrugged, a naughty grin accompanying the playful glint in your eyes, “you’re following my orders flawlessly.”
he scoffed amusedly, kissing his teeth, “ah, is that right?”
you hummed, eager with taking the back and forth further, see where it takes you, “such a good boy.”
the giggle that tumbled out of you as he narrowed his eyes betrayed you, breaking into a full fit of laughter as he tickled your sides, your legs leaving his waist. he tauntingly bit your neck, not enough to hurt you, grinning mischievously, “i’m letting you get away with too much. need to teach you a lesson.”
the laugh died in your throat the second he lifted his shirt up, showing his body to you for the first time. michelangelo would have loved to sculpt him, that’s the first thought your slowed down brain could come up with as you let your eyes wander all over his upper body.
he was toned, his eight pack abs glowing effortlessly for your mouth to water, his nipples a brownish color and so inviting, making you lean on your forearms for a better view.
the arm that wrapped around one of your legs and pushed it on the side was the one inked with those intricate designs you spent boring, lazy afternoons analyzing, and now they were the reason why you could feel a familiar buzz down your core again, coating your panties with even more of your sticky juice.
“cat got your tongue?” there was no way you could even think of a witty come-back with the way he lowered his pretty face between your thighs, his cocky smirk never leaving his expression as his eyes fixated on your own, challenging you.
but you were long gone, willing to let him do whatever he wanted to your body. you stared intently as his fingers hooked under the hem of your shorts, pulling them down in a sensual motion, until they fell on the floor.
your head fell backwards as he let his nose trace your soaked slit, still hidden underneath the layer of cotton panties, “is this okay?”
he only needed your eager nod to leave a subtle kiss on your clit, then lap at your slick through the thin material, “taste so good, doll.”
jeongguk repeated the motion, licking at you through your undies and letting his big nose brush against your clit torturously, his saliva and your wetness causing the fabric to dig between your lips uncomfortably, showing yourself to him.
you unconsciously bucked your hips up, eagerly demanding to set you free, but he held you down by your waist, “patience, baby.”
you whined loudly, and you couldn’t believe how delirious you sounded already, only moments after your earlier climax. he seemed to enjoy your reactions, the tip of his tongue teasing your entrance and ripping a desperate moan out of you, trying to push yourself into him further but being held down by his strong palms.
you fell on your back, your hair sprawled over your pillows, suddenly too weak to fight against him. he chuckled darkly, speaking against your core, “you’re so cute. so eager for me, angel.”
when he lifted himself up, his mouth glistened with your juice, and you couldn’t help but blush at the image. you were so wet, the liquid stained him even through the layer of clothing still keeping you from fully feeling him.
the silent plead in your eyes was listened to. jeongguk slid off your panties in one swift motion, his eyes hungry at the sight revealed to him, “fuck. so perfect. the prettiest.”
he didn’t show mercy at your weakened state, returning his starved mouth on your cunt, slurping at your lips and sucking on your clit, the stimulation making you see stars under your eyelids.
your eyes snapped open the moment you felt something tentatively poking at your entrance, and as you lowered your head you saw his finger playing with your virgin hole, going up to collect your slick from your slit, then returning on where you were starting to need him.
but you were anxious. he immediately saw it in the way you got up on your forearms again, instinctively closing your legs around his hand. his eyes found yours, reassuringly, “baby. you alright?”
you nodded sheepishly, “yeah. i’m just— scared. don’t want it to hurt.”
the hand that was playing with you now laid on your lower stomach, rubbing it in a sweet manner while he sought for your mouth with his, leaving a honeyed peck on it, “it will hurt a bit, pretty. but i’ll try and make it feel good, hm? if you’re not sure, we can always stop.”
you could only bite your lip as the both of you searched for security in each other’s eyes. he tilted his head, waiting for your approval, the grin spreading and making his long dimples visible infectious, and you stumbled on your words, “can you— kiss me while you do it?”
he hummed fondly, his lips immediately finding yours as he positioned himself between your legs, spreading again and granting him access to the spot you were anxiously eager to feel him.
his tongue slowly moved with yours and lightly lulled your racing heartbeat, instilling some needed tranquility in your system as you felt him close to your core again. his middle finger repeated a circular motion around it, spreading your stickiness, only to bring it on your hole before delicately pushing his digit inside.
a choked out moan escaped you, captured promptly by his lips, keeping you somewhat distracted from the slight burn you felt. it grew the more he slipped himself inside you, and you bit his lip to conceal the pain.
he growled at the action, retreating his finger only to push it in again, this time tentatively deeper. he went over the movement a few times, enough to get you adjusted to the foreign presence, and the more he did it, the more the sharpness turned into pleasure.
”feel good, princess?” the pet name was whispered against your swollen lips, and you kept your eyes closed as you nodded, basking in the newly welcomed feeling.
when he started curling the finger inside you, you involuntarily bucked yourself up against him, your body spasming with your hole and he groaned at the feeling of your tightness, unconsciously grinding on the sheets.
he couldn’t help himself from breaking your kiss to look down, getting lost in the way his digit got sucked inside you, only to come out soaked in your juice. without warning, he slowly added another finger, and you arched your back, searching for support in his shoulder.
jeongguk’s eyes kept jumping between your wet cunt, where his fingers worked in and out, and your pleasure-contorted expression, your mouth agape and unleashing your every moan as your eyes squeezed shut.
he felt deliriously close only from the image, his hard dick desperate for friction and insatiable with the way he was still constricted in his jeans. but this moment was about you and you only. once he felt the way you gripped his shoulder tighter at one particular curl of his digits, he kept hitting that spot repeatedly, faster.
you didn’t notice his face retreating at first, too lost in the bliss of his purposed touch, but you gasped harshly, your eyes tearing open the moment you felt his lips enveloping your clit again and sucking at it, lapping all around it, tasting it as if it was his first meal after ages.
when you looked down, you found him already staring at you through half-lidded eyes. you wailed, feverish, “oh, shit. gguk, don’t— don’t do that.”
he hummed questioningly, and the sound reverberated against your sensitive nub.
you rolled your eyes back, ”gonna cum again if you— fuck.”
“cum around my fingers, baby. cum on my tongue,” the words came out slurred, his mouth full of you, the drenched sounds of your pussy making his encouragement even more erotic as he added a third finger.
his digits kept digging relentlessly inside you, that spot that made your legs weakly squish jeongguk between them being hit repeatedly and bringing you close to your second climax.
what completely undid you were his eager cries against your cunt, and when you managed to lift your head to look down at the boy working so desperately to make you cum on his lips, you saw his hips rutting frantically against your sheets.
you didn’t even have time to announce it, the way your hole spasmed around his fingers and your high-pitched moans doing it for you as you fully let go for the second time because of jeongguk. it was more intense, your body moving with it and unconsciously running away from the touch once it became too intense.
jeongguk cleaned you as best as he could, slurping your juices and licking you off his fingers, climbing up to find your lips and share your own taste with you, his chin coated with your slick.
your pleasured sounds mixed together, the both of you panting and soon laying in silence, one beside the other, staring at the ceiling. you laughed breathlessly, “fuck, gguk. i almost died.”
he only chuckled along with you, the sound strained and dying soon in his throat. with your heartbeat and your breathing settling down, you turned to the side to find jeongguk with his eyes squeezed shut and his jaw clenching. his fists were clutching the fabric beside him, and his knuckles were white from the effort.
it wasn’t complicated to understand why, the next thing you spotted being the hard outline of his cock looking completely suffocated by his pants. you gulped, “gguk. you seem hard.”
he let out a delirious scoff, his eyes finding yours with an intensity you were only then noticing, ”i am hard, baby. so hard for you.”
you tentatively guided your hand to the button of his jeans, undoing it along with the zip. your words were hesitant, but so sincere, ”let me touch you. wanna make you feel good, too.”
jeongguk watched with his mouth agape as you straddled his lap, sitting on his legs only after sliding his pants down to his ankles. you looked so innocent, timidly playing with the hem of his boxers, and he tried to be patient, but he couldn’t.
he groaned, his head thrown back. “___. please, do something.”
his eyes were glossy with frustration, and you had to fight the urge to kiss him stupid, focusing on the task ahead. a big one, indeed. you weren’t going to lie, you were already intimidated by the outline of it.
now that your naked body sat on top of him, being faced with his almost totally bare skin, you realized how much bigger he was compared to you. of course, he was taller, always towering over you, teasing you for your height and pretending he didn’t see you, bumping into you purposefully or asking how’s the weather down there?
but with his large palm resting at your side and almost covering your entire tummy, you realized the implications of such difference. he could totally wreck you, if he wanted to.
ogling at his dick didn’t make it better. it looked huge. a wet patch stained his underwear near the tip, and you salivated at the sight of it.
you tentatively let your finger run along the covered length, and he hissed, slightly thrusting his hips, making you slide closer, “baby. don’t tease.”
the apology was ready and fast on your lips, genuine concern written in your eyes. you didn’t want to keep his suffering going, but you were also hesitant with how exactly you were going to please him. you’ve never seen a real-life dick, and you’ve certainly never touched one.
it was like jeongguk could read your every thought, your wide orbs like an open book to him, reassurance slipping out of him naturally, “doll. you see this?” he took your wrists and laid your hand on his hardness, gulping at the contact, “you feel this? this is what you did to me. there’s no reason why you should doubt yourself, okay?”
you nodded, still unsure, but surely smiling at his sweet tone. he grinned himself, “you’re so hot, and i literally almost came just by looking at you.”
the giggle that escaped you was lively and it eased your nerves with the way it mirrored in his eyes, fondly jumping all over your face. you bit your lip as you escaped his attentive gaze, finally freeing his cock from his confines and making him release a shaky sigh.
it was perfect. pretty. it touched just under his belly button, the tip angry and wet with precum, the pulsing veins running along its length making it throb.
you took it in your hand delicately, jeongguk hissing, and you gasped under your breath. it felt thick in your hold, your fist barely closing around it.
you weren’t sure what to do. your only examples were pornos, and you knew not to fully trust them. but as you started letting your wrist tentatively flick up and down, slowly, you eagerly drank in his reaction.
jeongguk moaned lowly, his eyelids fluttering shut, focusing on the feeling of your smooth hands taking care of his boner. he got louder when you unexpectedly played with his tip, your thumb swirling around it and spreading his wetness down.
your movements were messy, stutteringly uncoordinated, but the concentrated look in your eyes as you stared at his member intently made his head spin, wishing he could fill your slightly agape, watering mouth with it.
in your own mind, you wished his length could be stuffing up your cunt, instead. you slowed down your doings, ending up haltering them as he found your face again, a protesting whine ready to escape him, but you were quicker to surprise him, your voice shy, ”wanna feel you inside me.”
jeongguk groaned deliriously, eyes rolling back at the simple request, ”fuck. you sure?”
you whispered, ”please.”
”of course, angel. been waiting for so long.”
your mouths found each other quickly, starving, both your heartbeats picking up at the prospect of what was going to happen. he combed through your hair to move them behind your ears, rolling the two of you and making you the one laying under his weight.
in between kisses, you asked, impatient, “do you have a condom?”
”yeah, got one in my wallet,” he was panting with effort just as you were, moving from you only to fully free himself from his clothes and then search in his jeans pockets.
as he took the condom out, ripping it open, he stumbled on his words, suddenly awkwardly self-conscious, “it’s not like i have it because i was— expecting us to, huh—“
”jeongguk. it’s okay,” your sweet voice interrupted his overthinking, pulling him to be on top of you again by his arm, “i’m glad you have it, ‘cause i need to feel you. right now.”
he didn’t need to be told twice. you watched, eyes glossy with want, need, as he rolled the condom along his length, huffing out at the sensitivity.
jeongguk brought you closer to him by your thighs, wrapping them around him. he lowered himself on his forearms, his forehead touching yours, eyes swimming together, the proximity making the both of you smile sheepishly.
he exhaled, “are you still sure about this, doll?”
you nodded, the subtle but growing anxiety making your words get stuck in your throat. jeongguk was gentle, patient, his large palm cupping your cheek, “need to hear you say it.”
”yes. i’m sure. want you so bad,” the confession was slurred, shy under his adoring gaze. he kissed along your jaw, slow, intentional.
“okay. just know we can stop whenever you want. let me know if it hurts. i wanna hear you, hm?” his eyes searched yours, frantically, making sure you were good.
as you nodded again, he grasped your hand to hold it, letting your fingers intertwine and lay by your head. with the other hand, he took his length and positioned it where you needed him the most.
jeongguk made it all feel so intimate, special, and safe, that you sensed your eyes water with a feeling stronger than the words you could allow yourself to say. you felt eternally grateful to him for turning a moment you used to dread into something so delicate and precious.
you felt adored. you felt seen, and heard. you felt protected, understood. you saw your reflection in his eyes, in a way that made you want to hide in there forever, maybe travel a bit further down and find home in his heart.
as he started easing himself inside you, both of you gasping at the feeling, his hand gripping yours harder, a tear ran down your cheek. it was a mixture of emotions, sensations. the fullness of his cock entering you, the burn that came with it, his eyes widening alarmingly as he noticed the tears welling along your bottom lashes.
he stilled inside you, his tip now nuzzled in your warmth, his breath hitching, “does it hurt? baby, what’s wrong?”
”no, it’s just—“ it was on the tip of your tongue, but you couldn’t say it. not now. maybe never? you swallowed it down your throat, “it hurts a bit but it feels so good, gguk.”
”yeah? fuck. you’re so tight, princess. taking me in so good,” his praises replaced the hurt, both emotional and physical, with a familiar fuzzy pleasure, pooling in your lower stomach and releasing more of your wetness on his dick, making it easier for him to slip inside you.
he groaned as he bottomed out, your moan higher than intended. you felt him throb inside you, just how he could feel you pulse around him. a string of curses followed as he repeated the slow action, pulling back to his tip only to push back in, making sure you grew accustomed to the feeling.
”gguk. i feel so full,” you cried, wrapping your legs tighter around his waist, forcing him to stay still inside you. he growled, kissing along your neck and leaving small bites to contain himself from snapping his hips against you.
it was complicated, with the sounds escaping your lips resounding sweetly in his ears and your hole tightening around him in a torturous manner making him release precum inside the condom.
”baby, can i please move? i’m gonna go crazy,” his voice was strained, whiny, muffled in the crook of your neck as your fingers combed through his hair, unconsciously searching for comfort.
your granting hum was more of a high-pitched whine, but he took it positively as he attempted one first thrust inside you, followed shortly by another. your moans got stuck, the air cut from your throat the more he picked up his pace, lifting his face from your neck and straightening up to admire the scene.
it was better than anything he’d ever witnessed, his thickness stuffed in your tight, virgin hole and taking him in so perfectly. he took his free hand to hold you still by your hip as he pushed himself deeper.
you were a mess underneath him. legs squeezing around him, you barely gave jeongguk space to move. you wailed, his name tumbling out your tongue repeatedly as he fucked into you faster. he’d been so gentle with you until that moment, but now his roughness made you impossibly wetter.
when you let your eyes flutter open, you could feel yourself spasm around him at the sight in front of you. his abs contracted with the effort of his pushes, his cock slammed into you relentlessly, his nipples hardened and called for your touch.
you threw one hand to his pec and felt his firmness under you, gripping it for support as he pounded you with intent, your nails scratching his skin, the sounds of your bodies slapping together overtaking your pleasured moans.
he panted, rambling, “fuck, love this pussy. love fucking this pussy. wanna fuck it forever.”
“made just for me. such a perfect fit.”
“that’s how you’ve been waiting to be fucked, huh? nice and deep, you fucking love that.”
his praises and dirty comments made your head spin, your eyes rolling to the back of your head, letting your mouth hang open and release your cries into the stuffy room.
the sight of your fucked out state underneath his control was going to torture him for the following weeks, he was sure of that. he’d see you, sprawled out on your bed for him, your tits moving up and down with each thrust, your pleasured tears staining your face as his name left your pillowy lips like a mantra, every time he’d close his eyelids.
he had to physically hold himself back from releasing already, his length too sensitive and eager, but he wanted to make this moment last for as long as he could possibly handle. he closed his eyes, but he couldn’t escape you. you were loud, and the hottest thing he’s ever heard.
and then, the challenge became harder when you stuttered, unexpectedly, “wanna ride you.”
he threw his head back, a feverish groan rising up his throat, “fuck. you do, pretty?”
you hummed, just as unhinged, your legs untightening around him and weakly pulling at his arm to try and bring him to lay on the bed. he pulled himself out of you slowly, making you cringe at the emptiness, and as he let his back fall on the soft surface, he lifted your figure effortlessly and led you to straddle him.
now on top of him, you weren’t so confident with your earlier claim anymore. underneath you, jeongguk was panting, his pupils blown out, lips agape, cock laying unattended on his stomach. he stroked your sides comfortingly, subtly pulling you closer, and the action caused your slicked pussy to grind against his balls.
the two of you moaned at the contact, and he immediately took his length to pump it a couple of times, gently tapping it against your tummy. you lifted your hips up, positioning yourself on his tip, looking down at jeongguk for support.
the lazy smile you were met with made your heart stutter in your chest, and you put your hand on top of his, still tightly gripping your hip, as you sank down his dick.
your head was thrown back in pleasure, your back arching into him, and jeongguk had to fight with himself to keep his eyes from fluttering shut, wanting to bask in the image of you.
as you fully took him in, you leaned your weight on the palm that fell on his chest, his hands steadying you promptly by your waist, praise ready on his tongue, “doing so amazing, princess. making me feel so good.”
you attempted moving subtly, trying to adjust to the more intense stretch, and the hand that was still holding his led it to cup your boob, instructing him to knead at it.
he moaned shakily, playing with your tit while you lifted your hips only to sink them down again, tentatively repeating the action and gaining confidence the more his whines got louder.
soon, you lost control. the way your clit would brush against his skin every time you bounced down made you pulse relentlessly around him, grinding into the sensation and rotating your hips on him with intent.
you tried to prevent it, to hold yourself back, but all your resolution dissolved in a second the moment you felt jeongguk’s thumb teasing your nub. you jolted forward, still balancing yourself on his chest, his hand on your breast working to keep you straight.
”gguk, i think— i think i’m close again,” you admitted ashamedly, your cheeks flushing but your desire unable to make you stop rutting your hips against his touch, his cock throbbing around your walls.
”yeah? then cum around it, make me feel it,” his low voice spurred you on, the thumb that was teasing you now slicing on your nipple, spreading your slick on your boob.
and that made you let go, for a third time, convulsing on top of him, your cries louder as you spasmed around his thick length, your cunt hugging him impossibly tighter, and for a moment you genuinely feared he’d get stuck.
the strength taken out of you was enough to make you fall onto him, your face in his neck as you panted frantically, his heartbeat matching the speed of yours under your palm laying on his chest.
jeongguk’s voice was weak as he spoke in your ear, his fingers stroking your back comfortingly, “that was amazing, baby. so good.”
you appreciated his constant praises, a lazy grin spreading on your lips, but you couldn't ignore the way he kept thudding inside you, quiet whines stuck in his throat as he tried to conceal them by clutching your sides tighter, stilling himself.
jeongguk wailed feverishly when you lifted yourself up again, resuming your earlier actions, the ones that were bringing him to the point he badly wanted to reach. he was breathless as he took in the determined glint in your eyes, “fu— fuck. doll, what are you—“
”wanna make you cum, gguk.”
he physically couldn’t hold himself from rolling his eyes far deep, bucking up to meet your hips, and the force of his thrusts threw your weak body back on him again, your hard nipples brushing against his equally stiff ones.
”i’ll fuck you, baby, hm? you already did so good for me,” his words were hushed, whispered, delirious, the sound of them overtaken by the sharp pounding.
but he made sure you could feel every syllable, his lips close to your lobe as you held yourself tightly on his shoulders, “so perfect. letting me fuck you good and deep. gonna make me cum so hard, doll.”
your brain couldn’t process any other kind of response other than loud cries, your cunt being relentlessly abused. the waves of your last orgasm still flowed inside you, the buzz coming back to life as the new position gave him perfect access to your sweet, needy spot, hitting it at an inhumane force.
his effort was translated into deep, raspy growls only pushing you closer to the edge, and you swore you could pass out from the overstimulation. but you basked in it, the tears in your eyes blurring your vision.
”you wanna cum again? i know you can, c’mon. i know you got it in you, pretty. just another one. cum with me.”
his pleading, delirious tone undid you. the way you both released with harsh moans was perfectly synced, his hips jolting you forward as you chased your high against his lower stomach. with a few more pushes, he let go fully inside the condom, all the energy being ripped from him at that moment, his hands freeing your waist from the sharp grip while his head fell weakly on the side.
the two of you were almost wheezing, your exhales shaking in your panting chests as you lifelessly rested on him, slowly being lulled by his breathing.
you didn’t even notice yourself slipping so easily into slumber, and if it weren’t for his delicate touch tracing your closed eyelids and moving your hair behind your ear, his sweet voice preventing you from fully falling unconscious, you would have enjoyed just staying in that position forever.
“sweetheart. you sleepy?”
you only hummed, the sound rough and thick.
he removed himself from you slowly, both of you still gasping at the overstimulation, and he gently laid you on your back before tying the condom and throwing it in the bin next to your nightstand.
as soon as your head hit the pillow, your eyes fluttered shut again. the room spun faintly, and your body, exhausted, ignored every request your mind was screaming at you. you were cold, goosebumps rising on your naked skin; your thighs still trembled, a mess of wetness and slick. but you were too tired to move. you could only lay there, sprawled on the sheets.
luckily, jeongguk thought of everything. his mind was full of you, his only thought being taking care of your figure and making sure you were safe, comforted.
he had taken your virginity. it wasn’t just a physical act— it was a gift you had entrusted him with, something you had kept close to your heart, even through all the fears and anxieties you’d shared with him. you had always been afraid to let go, to give such an intimate part of yourself to someone.
but you trusted him, fully and deeply, in a way that you hadn’t trusted anyone before. that knowledge bloomed in his chest like warmth spreading to every corner of his body. he felt a deep sense of responsibility and gratitude. he wanted to honor that trust.
with care, jeongguk slipped away from your side to retrieve a warm, damp towel. the cool air hit your skin as he left, and you stirred slightly, though not fully awake. when he returned and began gently wiping you down, you startled at the sensation, your eyes slowly fluttering open. you were met with his grinning face, his eyes crinkling at the sides, that same boyish smile that always made your heart skip a beat.
“we should clean up, baby,” he said soft, his voice warm and coaxing as he continued to gently clean the slickness between your legs.
“tired,” you murmured in response, your voice thick with exhaustion. “tomorrow.” the word came out as more of a sigh than anything else. you stretched your arms out toward him, your lips forming a small pout. “cuddle. now.”
jeongguk laughed fondly at your sleepy demands, shaking his head as he tossed the towel to the floor. without a second thought, he slid back into bed beside you, pulling the covers over your naked bodies. the warmth of the blanket and the weight of him beside you immediately soothed the lingering shivers in your body, and you sighed in relief.
instinctively, you reached for him, your leg curling around his, your hands seeking the familiar comfort of his waist. your head rested on his chest, where you could feel the steady thump of his heart beneath your cheek. his arm wrapped around you naturally, his fingers tracing gentle circles along your spine.
it wasn’t unusual for you to cuddle, especially during movie nights, or simply when the other needed comfort.
but this was different. there was a new weight to the way your bodies pressed together, your brain grasping around the reality of what had just happened.
your first instinct faced with that thought was to chuckle lightly, your sleepy brain struggling to come up with any more reasonable reaction. when he hummed and moved to look down at your face, you hid yourself further in his chest, your voice muffled, “i can’t believe you fucked me.”
he sounded tauntingly cocky as he moved your hair from your forehead, “now that you put it like that, well, i did.”
your drowsy state lowered all your inhibitions, your eyes fluttering close as you spilled your honesty, “i’ve been fantasizing about this moment for so long.”
“yeah? what a naughty girl,” his playful tone made you blush, the low voice and the hand grazing at the small of your back making you clench around nothing, still sensitive.
you lightly pushed at his chest with a weak smile, “you literally said you were waiting for it to happen, too.”
jeongguk’s eyes gleamed with amusement, his tone dripping in mock shame, “did i, pretty? did i do that? oh god, how indecent of me.”
the taunting banter went on for a while, your fond grins almost breaking your faces in two halves as you started a quick tickle war. it was almost surreal how easily the two of you slipped back into the habituality of your dynamic, as if nothing had changed at all. and in a way, nothing had. you were still you, and he was still jeongguk— the boy who teased you relentlessly and made you laugh until your stomach hurt.
as the laughter faded, your body began to relax completely, your muscles loosening as you sank further into his embrace. your head rested against his toned pecs, and you could feel the steady rise and fall of his breathing beneath your cheek. his fingers continued their gentle caresses along your back, and for the first time in a long while, you felt completely at peace.
but jeongguk, even in the quiet comfort of the moment, couldn’t let it end just yet. his mind was still racing, still full of thoughts of you.
he wanted to hear your voice. wanted to be soothed by its melody. he spoke quietly, almost hesitant, his breath warm against your hair, “don’t fall asleep so soon. i’ll miss you.”
your voice was rough with weariness, but you were quick with your answer, “i’m literally lying on top of you.”
“i know,” he whispered, his thumb brushing softly against your waist. “but i wanna talk to you.”
with great effort, you blinked your eyes open, lifting your head just enough to look at him through half-lidded eyes, “it’s your fault if i can’t talk right now.”
“damn, i got a magic stick,” his voice sounded oddly proud of it and you groaned, hitting him weakly on his stomach and causing him to giggle.
“you’re so gross.”
“you hurt me!” he whined dramatically and it made you roll your eyes amusedly.
chuckling softly, you took his face in your hands and pressed your fingers gently against his lips, “shut up.” your voice was playfully fond as you nestled back against him, your eyelids growing heavier by the second, dozing off again.
at least trying to, because only a minute later his soft voice resounded again.
it was barely audible in the stillness, “___.”
“hmm?”
“i’m so happy.”
his whispered voice tickled your ear and you giggled, brushing it on your shoulder with a sheepish grin on your lips.
you looked up at him through droopy eyelids, both your orbs swimming in a deep feeling you couldn’t name, “i am too. i don’t think i can feel my pussy anymore, but i’m very happy nonetheless.”
your wittiness even after being completely drained of all your energy surprised him, the laugh escaping him moving in his chest and reflecting in your own fond smile.
he left a peck on your forehead, bringing you to lay down on him again, “you’re so silly. i love you.”
the words left his lips so naturally, as if he had always known them to be true, and they sounded so right that it took both of you another moment to realize their implications.
your heart stopped, and both of you froze. your breath hitched and your eyes widened, but you stayed still, too startled to look up at him.
you felt his heart beat impossibly faster in your ear, and you perfectly pictured the shock that was painting his expression right now.
his hands clutched your sides tighter, trying to find a way to keep his running mind from spiraling, your silence not helping whatsoever. he stuttered, “i— i mean. i— oh god, i’m so sorry.”
the hurt in his tone immediately made your chest clench, panic flushing in your veins. you met his eyes alarmedly, jumping between them, “jeongguk. don’t be sorry. you love me?”
he wasn’t sure what to do, couldn’t figure out if the feeling was mirrored as intensely in you as it was in him. it had been building inside him for weeks, lingering beneath the surface, making his heart race and his thoughts blur every time you were near.
the realization hadn’t come to him in a grand, sweeping moment but in the quiet of the bookstore one random afternoon. he had been stacking shelves, mindlessly organizing the rows of novels, when he caught sight of you. you were tucked into a corner, absorbed in a murakami novel, your fingers brushing the edges of the pages with care.
he hadn’t expected you to show up that day. he was sure you’d mentioned having lectures and that you couldn’t meet up with him, so seeing you there, completely unannounced, had startled him.
he remembered standing there for a moment, frozen in place, just staring at you walk through the door. and then you had lifted your head, and your eyes met his across the quiet, sunlit room.
the smile you gave him was sheepish as you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, your confession tumbling out softly, “i skipped my classes. i wanted to be here. needed to see you.”
it was shy, and said with a feeling in your gaze that he was scared to decipher.
but he couldn’t help the way it settled in his heart. stubborn, unmoving. the truth was clearly in front of him, and it took the semblance of your face.
you were the truth. he was in love.
so, he could only be truthful to you, “i— yes. i love you.”
the words sank into your skin, filling you with warmth and a sense of completeness that made your chest swell. you exhaled deeply through your nose, trying to steady the burst of emotion building inside you, but your eyes softened, and a tear slipped down your cheek as you smiled, wide and genuine.
“i love you too, gguk.”
it was a simple reply, but the weight behind it carried everything. you didn’t need to say anything more. you couldn’t even if you wanted to, your lips immediately eating at each other, gulping down your furious flow of thoughts and accepting. hearing. feeling. seeing.
all the times you forced to keep shut and convince yourself that what you saw in him and all his care towards you was just coming from a place that would forever see you two as friends. all the secret touches, the shared meals, the warmth nights on your couch. all the books you read for him, all the lines he highlighted for you.
it was love. all along. and you felt its power against him, your heartbeats syncing.
when you finally pulled away, you rested your forehead against his, both of you breathing softly in the quiet aftermath of the confession. jeongguk’s arms tightened around you, pulling you even closer as if he couldn’t bear to let go.
the silence that followed wasn’t awkward or uncertain. it was peaceful. comfortable.
and lulled by the quiet, jeongguk ended up being the first to fall asleep, his nervous energy fading away, replaced by a deep sense of contentment. his breathing became slow and steady, his face nuzzled into the crook of your neck, his muscles relaxing.
despite your earlier exhaustion, you were too wired to sleep. you were still flowing with excitement. the night’s events hit you with great force, and kept you wide awake.
quietly, you reached for your phone on the nightstand, careful not to disturb jeongguk. the screen lit up, showing the time. 3:47 am.
even though it was late, you couldn’t resist. you pulled up jimin’s contact and pressed the call button. waiting. he was always awake at this hour.
jimin had been your best friend for years. your loyal confidant, the one you could splutter all your feelings to and never be judged. he had been by your side all along this particular ride, going from a silly, little crush to feeling raging love for the boy in your arms.
you smiled wide at the prospect of jimin’s reaction at the news you were about to share with him. he was the first person you wanted to inform, he deserved to know.
“bitch, don’t tell me you’re crying over jeongguk, ‘cause—“
those are the first words that came through the line, and they made you silently chuckle at the irony, immediately engaging in his banter, “well, sorta kinda. he said he loves me.”
there was a beat of silence on the other end, followed by jimin’s amused scoff, “wow. crazy news. would have never guessed.”
you were stunned, to say the least. your mouth hung open as you whisper-yelled, “bitch! is this seriously all you have to say?”
you were mindful not to wake jeongguk with your conversation, looking down at him with care. his cheek was squished on your small breast, his mouth pouting and releasing heavy puffs. one of his hands rested protectively over your side, and his thumb brushed your under boob.
he was cozily nestled between your legs, his wavy hair brushing your chin, and he looked so peaceful it was like he was made to be held by you.
you couldn’t help the tears from welling in your eyes as jimin’s next words accompanied the view of the boy you loved, now finally yours.
“babe, c’mon, it was obvious.”
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aroaceinaerospace · 9 months
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sometimes I so deeply miss being a teenager because there was so much more space to just talk to people the same age as you and figure out who you are. there's nothing quite like the vulnerability you were able to reach late at night during a sleepover with friends
#finding yourself at a different time compared to the people around you can be so so so isolating#i know its talked about a lot in the book refusing compulsory sexuality how we seem to pin life events on certain ages#like i always enjoyed hearing about my friends and how they see the world and their experiences#and the way they were able to just talk freely about who they are and where they fit in the world#im so grateful that ive been on the journey i have been on to finding myself#because all the books and content that ive consumed have had such a positive impact on thinking more complexly about the world#but since it seems a lot of people go through this in middle school or high school i feel so behind#i didnt realize i was ace (or even just that i was “different”) until i was a sophomore in high school#and even then it was just hearing the word and saying oh i guess thats me#and it wasnt until about a year or two ago that i really started feeling the need to learn more and be more connected#so it seems like ive been growing at a much slower pace than other people around me#and i know everyone grows and learns at different paces and theres nothing wrong with it#but it can be very disheartening to see and feel that disparity between yourself and your peers#and because a lot of people do their growth at a younger age and because we lose those age groups as we become “adults”#it becomes so much harder to find people your age who are on the same journey to be able to talk through things with#and yes there is the internet which is so wonderful in connecting people from all over the world#but theres just something so special about being sleep deprived and just pondering existence with people you care about#on top of the fact that im just genuinely terrified of accidentally hurting people by saying the wrong thing on the internet#anyway what a tag rant that im sure nobody will see
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starkeyisthelastname · 5 months
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stepbro!rafe who’s so pussy whipped and he doesn’t even realize till he accidentally cums inside
Rafe Cameron’s mind had always been a messed up and as “normal” as he tried to act most of the time, he found himself wanting to do nasty things with his step-sister of all people. The same sister that was sweeter than Sarah if that could even be possible. He felt that it was his job to guide you and teach you things your naive 19 year old self didn’t know anything about. Sure Ward could show you the ropes on how to be financially responsible and invest your money to make more, but he wanted to teach how to take a real dick.
It was easy to get you reeled in, now that you were truly stepping into the adult world you became curious about sex and even being nearly the same age he was more experienced than you. It didn’t take much to find himself in your room every night, fingers buried inside your tight cunt as he stretched you out.
It was when he pushed himself inside you for the first time that he completely lost it. He couldn’t help but let out a few small groans, eyes rolling back as he focused on just how tight you wrapped around him. “Shit…” He breathed out, blue eyes coming back to watch you.
“Rafey…” You whimpered, voice fragile as your step-brother’s huge cock began to thrust in and out of you. You knew this had to be wrong somehow, but you loved Rafe and put all your trust into him. (That was just your naive mistake.)
Rafe was selfish, wanting to enjoy it for him. Sure he hoped it made you feel good, but right now this was the best pussy he had ever had the pleasure of being in. “Shh.. alright? Don’t fucking start whining. Just take it like a good girl.” He rasped out in that nasally rich boy tone.
You wanted to make Rafe proud and that’s exactly what you were going to do by laying there and taking it. It was an overwhelming amount of pleasure and your lower stomach was feeling funny the harder he pounded your sopping hole. Your long lashes fluttered close, quiet moans leaving your mouth as you tried not to be loud.
Rafe was having a hard time staying composed. How dare his step-sister have a cunt this magical? He was losing his pride each passing moment the more you squeezed him and the more he thrusted in. He was becoming completely pussy whipped for you and his frustration had his hand around your throat in seconds.
Your eyes immediately shot open at the metal ring digging into your neck as he brutally fucked you. You felt as if you should be scared, but you felt quite opposite. It turned you on, made you clench around his dick as you creamed around him. Your smaller hand came to rest on his own that was against your throat, mouth opening in a hoarse whine.
“Make a mess on your step-bro’s dick. Yeah…you are a freak aren’t you? Getting off on being choked and getting dicked down.” He rasped out, turned on more than he ever had been.
Rafe was sure he had just fallen in love. Of course it was his step-sister of all people. The way you looked right now. The way you felt right now. He had never came inside any girl raw, but there you were coming down from an intense orgasm looking so fucking beautiful. His eyes darkened, staring down at you through slits as his seed painted your insides white. He didn’t even know that he had just exploded inside of you until he heard you whimper at the new feeling.
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roturo · 1 year
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KILLIN' ME GOOD -professor!gojo x reader
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warnings: smut, teacher/student relationship, p in v sex, unprotected sex, bondage, dacryphilia, spanking, jealousy, degradation kink, fluff, porssesive behavior, age gap, (reader is +18), semi-public sex, car sex, lingerie, use of vibrator, whimpering, switch!gojo, humiliation kink, sadist behavior, s/d dynamics.
A/N: i wanted to write this one a long time ago! i really liked it, was really fun to write and also really cute! i've been quite busy with work but i'll try my best to continue writing!, i really liked this writing so reblogs are appreciated. :)
professor!gojo who’s been teaching you to be a sorcerer not even for two months, but already knows your favorite color, food, what type of music you like, what you search for in a guy, and why you’re becoming sorcerer. he knows more things but won’t say them out loud.
professor!gojo who won’t team you with any of the boys because he says ‘it’s just a distraction for young people’ but the truth is, he can’t tolerate seeing you with another man, trying to hide all the feelings he has for you.
professor!gojo who gives you the hardest questions in class so he could see your frustrated face trying to give a coherent answer. professor!gojo who loses all his senses everytime you decide to use a skirt because every ten seconds he thinks about you and gets hard.
professor!gojo who starts feeling things he never thought he would feel. professor!gojo who never thought to really fall in love for a girl but just a quick fuck until he met you. professor!gojo who thinks you’re dangerously sweet but what a good thing he likes sweets and danger.
professor!gojo who is impressed by this new feeling you make and is entranced in every little action you do, making you unique. professor!gojo who’s been pumping his cock for 5 minutes in an empty classroom trying to find release after you made him hard with just a smile at him.
professor!gojo who gave you detention because you were a little bit too talkative with yuuji today and he doesn’t want you to become distracted in class, so when you go to detention after class he’s waiting for you.
professor!gojo who lays you down on his desk and starts eating you out while scissoring you, telling you how much he needs you.
‘I’m gonna’ fucking mark my territory with you today. ‘m gonna show you what a real man is.’ His words sound muffled while trying to talk and eat you out at the same time. Not letting himself waste any of your liquids, making sure every time you walk you would feel his tongue inside of you. 
professor!gojo who wouldn’t take it anymore and is rambing inside of you with all his force while you moan his name. 
‘Y-You.. A-ah!~ Little slut.. My little slut.’ His thrusts became harder with every word he said, his balls hitting your ass, a red mark appearing on your right cheek of how much he had slapped you.
professor!gojo who would overstimulate himself just to watch you cum again in his cock.
professor!gojo who would wait for you at the end of the class to give you a peck on the lips and wait for you to leave so he could fuckhimself because with just a small touch with you he gets hard.
professor!gojo who would buy you lunch everyday because why not? he has a lot of money. professor!gojo who would spend his money on you, saying you’re the only one with to spend this much money.
professor!gojo who would buy you personalized lingering because he loves your body in the colors of his eyes.
professor!gojo who would end the class sooner because he couldn’t bear your teasing and needed to have you right now.
professor!gojo who doesn’t let you cum and loves watching you cry for release on his cock.
‘Why don’t you ask Yuuji to make you cum, huh? You were all over him some moments ago like a whore mh? That’s all you are, no? Just a filthy needy whore.’ professor!gojo who would use his blindfold to tie up your arms and use you as a cum hole.
professor!gojo who would buy a vibrator for you to use in his class as a punishment and play with you, making you answer all of his questions while he plays with the velocity of the vibrator.
professor!gojo who would humiliate you in front of the class asking who gave you that hickey knowing damn well he’s the owner of it. everybody giving you teasing stares and asking if you have a boyfriend while he just proudly smirks at himself watching you get all flustered.
professor!gojo who made sure that no other guy would feel like him, touch you like him, fuck you like him… love you like him.
professor!gojo who would take you on dates in the most expensive restaurants in tokyo to treat you for being a good girl.
professor!gojo who would later ruin your makeup and hair while fucking you in the car because of how good you looked tonight. 
professor!gojo who would give you a bracelet with his initials.
professor!gojo who wouldn’t expect you to use it everyday, telling everyone you have a boyfriend, but not saying who.
professor!gojo who would be whimpering your name while you give him a handjob, saying a lot of ‘i love you’s’ and ‘thank you’. feeling brand new and so loved thanks to you.
professor!gojo who only wants to listen to you and follow you.
professor!gojo who says you’re killing him good with how perfect and good you are for him.
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voidcat · 3 months
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assigned knight!mithrun x royalty gn!reader – hcs and blurbs
a/n: this was supposed to be just some hcs but ended up as a 2.7k beast... nsfw content by the last third/half so minors do not interact ! and to clarify mc is one of the youngest of their family but age wise they're close to mithrun.
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renowed hero mithrun, one of the big talents who fought bravely during the war. mithrun who is left broken afterwards, losing all his purposes, all his senses, the deaths he witnessed, the news he received. at the frontlines, he receives news of his brother and his beloved marrying– no longer his beloved now, is she? he feels something inside him break but has to ignore it all away. he was never meant for the throne, not when his brother is in such a state, unable to wield a sword, when there is war raging at all sides, when people need to be led and to be supported at the frontlines.
mithrun who resembles an empty shell now, unsure how to carry on from then on, until one of the kings he fought side by side invites him among their ranks, their kin. "let us be your new home, and you can spend the rest of your days at ease, come now, honorary knight mithrun of house karansil, the leading hero, finishing slash of this war." no reason to refuse, he simply accepts, he agrees to becoming one of king's younger kids' assigned knight. maybe another task like this, this need to watch and protect will give him a sense of purpose, an excuse to keep on living.
and here enters you, the young royal, so oblivious, so unknowing to all those happening around you, not a single care and isolated from the world, you spend your days at the castle, strolling gardens, sketching and reading whenever you can, make a face at the slightest topic of future and marriages. aware of the unstoppable future that awaits you, the fate no royal can escape– save for those who are unelligable, those who fall ill and die or those like mithrun, no longer a part of their own kingdom. the young royal and their knight joint at the hip soon enough, days and weeks pass, years come by and you two never seperate.
loyal knight mithrun who always walks by your side, tailing behind like a shadow and the young royal, they still call you, that walks without a care in the world; who helps him to stop and smell the flowers again, talk over red poppies and shed tears together in seclusion, sneak desserts from the kitchens and taste the sun on berries while taking shelter in the shadow of great oaks, whom he chases after literally and figuratively– he agreed to become a knight, because by default they live by a single purpose, but mithrun notices himself finding his purpose again in the shape of your smile. how your chest moves up and down at night, how you tense and whisper to yourself when plagued by night horrors.
loyal knight mithrun always found next to you, holding your hand when you climb down the stairs, wrapping an arm around and pulling you closer to him when you cannot sleep at night. your breathing a lullaby to his ears, and you a source of comfort to him, as much as he is to you. as goal oriented as he is, and with the war dulling his senses and entire being, he was in a way, the perfect knight, just a man crafted of his duty and nothing else. And with abilities like his, he could come to your aid in no time, carve out the eyes that look at you the wrong way.
Yet as you nurse him back to reality, intentionally or not, he finds anxiety and guilt eating at him with each passing day. The same acts you once performed, he feels himself unable to respond with the same nonchalance now. When you bring another berry to his lips for him to eat, he does his best to take it from your hands without his lips making contact with your fingertips. He does his best to look away when you lick off the excess nectar dripping from the peach you’ve just eaten, even just standing outside your door grows harder and harder, his keen sense of smell betraying him and his body.
You should be guilty too, for not noticing how you’re tormenting him.
Preparing for bath, you take off your clothes, let your private garments drop to the floor like it’s nothing. Stepping into the bathtub, taking your sweet time as you do so, leaning your head backwards and letting out a content sigh— “Mithrun!” You call up to him in a sudden, eyes wide open, “can I ask you something?”
In fear of words betraying him, he settles for a nod. Making a gesture with your hand reachimg out, you signal for him to come closer. Hand diving into his hair like always, stroking his face, his cheeks and over his eyes, “when was the last time you have taken a bath?” You ask, giving him a curious gaze.
As he tries battling for an answer to give you, because if he knows you, he knows what will come after this and he is unsure his poor heart can survive it. “Ah, usually at night when you’re—“ “stop lying, I know you wait by my side every night too.” You cut him off.
Bringing a finger to your lips, you pretend to think. “Oh, I know! There is plenty of space here, why don’t you take a bath with me? Maintaining appearances is important, it keeps you refreshed and ready for everything, no?”
When you stare at him with big, begging eyes, words laced with concern adn worry, and all of it just for him, he finds himself unable to move, until he catches sight of you trying to take his armor off and drag him into the water with you.
There is plenty of space for more than one person, but you stand glued to his side, your warm body pressed up against his, fingers in his hair massaging his scalp, your fingertips tracing over his old scars. Mithrun finds himself vulnerable to your touch, soft and laced with love, colder than the water, sending electric down his spine every time.
Your father, the king, dotes on you and always brags about his trusted knight Mithrun at banquets. Raising a glass in honor of the man who saved his life and protects the life of one of his treasures— not knowing the same man is guilty of growing an attachment to the said treasure. every time the king or an elder praises him for not just past accomplishments but for his current post, he feels guilt beginning to bloom and grow– the knight supposedly in charge of you, protecting and shielding you from bad eyes strrugles to stand by your side at night.
should you really be wearing a nightgown see-through and light, he wants to ask, with just a little breeze you'd catch a cold in no time, he tries to rationalize his thoughts; trying to wipe off the images, how the moon shines down on you, how the thin material sticks to your skin, presenting you before him. he feels the guilt toward you most of all, after everything he has lived through he has gained a bit of instincts and senses and yet he is still the same despicable man of the past; how he repays your kindness, your love and care– why, he remembers it like yesterday when you stroke his cheek and prosthetic eye, placed a kiss there and looked at him like he is still whole. as his affection for you grows, he wishes more and more to return to just the end of the war, when he was still hollow and indifferent toward you.
Mithrun realizes in many ways he is your first witness. First to see you get stung by bees, at which you asked for him to kiss it better, usually the first to see you getting sick, immediately calling in a medic to prepare for you a brew; first to cuddle you to sleep at nights, your head buried into his chest and your legs wrapped around his; first to guide you, first to help you explore the castle grounds, the city, banquets to come and even your body, at your request.
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right outside your bedchambers one night, mithrun muses whether should he make a quick trip to his chambers. with the change of weather his usual armor and undergarment feel too thick. before he can teleport himself, muffled sounds of someone reaches his ears– out of breath and erratic, coming from no other direction than your chambers, the voice belonging only to you. frozen in place, he teleports himself into your room without a thought and finds himself nailed to his spot. the sight of you under the pale moonlight, a hand between your tighs, eyes closed shut and your face an expression he can only describe as 'pleasure'. mithrun has no clue for how long he stands there, stuck, feet glued to the floor, until you turn your head toward the door, eyes finding his and before he can see how you'll react, he teleports himself out– for hours he feels his beating frantic, threatening to burst out of his chest.
for the following days, he tries putting a distance between the two of you, replying with few words at most, avoiding your gaze, your touch like the plague. he can stand his guard only so long until he gives in, defeated by the sadness that takes over you after his sudden change of behavior. as if reading his mind, you do anything but drop the matter, eventually what he walked into coming to the surface as well. battling on the fields is easier, he thinks, there is only instincts, sharp and calculated moves, kill or be killed, conquer before you can be defeated– such is not the case outside war, and certainly not by your side, you always find a way to make things twice as difficult for him somehow. the scent of your body still haunts his senses and you have the courage to ask him what was going on with your body exactly!
you complain about all those people you see on castle grounds, exchanging gazes, holding hands, in the narrow hallways or the gardens, stealing kisses and using terms of endearment when conversing. not jealousy but yearning is apparent in your voice and he notices that much. it is not easy spending your whole life confined to a castle– even harder when you are a long life species, the hidden hallways remain a mystery only so long, few decades in and they lose all interest. "i couldn't sleep" you pout, "i was just lying down, must've thought myself in those scenes i often witness, and my hands were wandering around." your voice begins to drop with each word, "it was just trailing my fingers around until it felt... funny, and... ah... some sort of wetness, or so to speak." you finish shyly, turning your head away.
at your confession mithrun doesn't know how to react. such topics aren't exactly welcomed to be discussed so openly among your kind. burrowing his brows, he decides to take a simpler approach, from general to specific. "you see... our bodies have certain reactions reserved for certain situations." he does his best not to stammer over his words, does his absolute hardest to not make contact with those big, bright eyes of yours. "when we enter puberty, certain systems of ours go through changes to accomodate for new things we might experience in the future." one thing you have said bothers him though. "that was one of them. take that sensation you have described for example. it occurs so the act itself might take place easier and without causing discomfort for both sides." you seem to find his explanation helpful, judging from the smile slowly forming on your face. he can see the gears turning in your head, he hopes you reserve those new questions for the books you read.
"your highness, may i ask you something?" he blurts out, now or never. his formal way of addressing seems to catch you by surprise, he continues when seeing you nod. "if i won't be crossing any lines..." "there is no such thing as tha–" you say almost instinctively. "you said you were thinking, who was it?" he asks bluntly. "I..." your mouth opens and closes, head turned to the side, you cast your eyes downwards; he can see a blush creeping up. his ears pick up on you mumbling a 'no one' but he knows you are just deflecting now. if you are uncomfortable, he won't pry further. seeing him walk, you qucikly rush to his side, taking the arm he has offered you. "come now, what was it you said you wanted to do today? the greenhou–"
"could you lend me a helping hand actually!" you claim loudly in a sudden, fists clenched in excitement. "you know i would never refuse you as long as logi–" "i mean it, literally." you cut him off, emphasising on the word, and take his hand in yours, moving it in the air while giving him a determined look. considering the topic of conversation the two of you just had and now that... it doesn't take him long to connect two and two together. "a- absolutely not! i-" you will be the death of him, that's for sure. coughing few times, he tries gathering himself and catching breath. "your highness, acts such as the one you accidentally tried, are private matters. done by one's self or with a special one. you cannot just ask anyone that."
you bring your face closer to his, "i am not asking anyone, mithrun" you speak word by word, "i am asking you." the pronoun rolls off your lips like honey, poisoned. "when i say 'special', i mean a significant other, your highness." he adds the title at the end, already sounding defeated. you know exactly what he meant, why must you make things so difficult for him? "or a spouse, in our cases." he adds on, his gaze cast down, "though i doubt the same still applies for me." his voice comes out in a whisper, the unevitable future of an awaiting marriage haunts you both, and he wonders were he to return home, would he regain his title, be elligable for your hand after all.
in the end, he gives up. knight mithrun finds himself more vulnerable than before. lying in your bed, your body pressed against his with the both of you awake. bringing his hand to his lips, he licks his fingers and trails down your chest, your abdomen, down to your groin. feeling every crook, inch and curve of you, fingers moving smooth and slow, he drinks in your expressions, how your lips slightly part, pleasure taking over your entire body, how you grow wetter with each touch, each movement. he has to bring his other hand to your mouth at one point, it wouldn't be wise to have passerbys hear the sounds you make for him now. how you begin to whimper under his hand, small moans soon saying his name like a plea, 'more, more, more' you begin to chant– a symphony to his hears, he watches how your body begins to spasm in pleasure as you reach your high, coming all over his hand, making a mess.
bringing his hand to his lips, he licks his fingers, savoring your taste. with hazy eyes, you barely catch sight of him, your hand trying to make way to him. Mithrun sees your exhausted attemps and brings his cheek to your palm, the all-too-familiar gesture you grace him with on a daily basis; though rather than stroking, you try to pull him towards yourself. "oh? curious as to how you taste?"
the question leaves his mouth without a second thought, though you don't seem to register his words, too focused on his lips. giving his hand another, long lick; mithrun leans into you and for the first time his lips meet yours– your saliva mixing with his, your soft lips eagerly biting into him with wanton need, how that hand tries desperately to pull him even closer, you taste just as sweet everywhere, his taste buds decide. his lips meet yours once and does not let go ever, even when the two of you gasp for breath, oxygen loses all its purpose and though the thought should horrify him, he realizes and accepts easily: mithrun meets his demise at the mercy of you, far exceeding the point of no return.
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gatorbites-imagines · 8 months
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um could I request Conner Kent with a male reader who is just like him. Reader is a clone of another hero made by Cadmus, but the reader is a year or two older. When Conner and their first meet is during his initial escape and him coming apart from the team, and them bonding over them being clones. What would their relationship be like.
Conner Kent x Plastic Man Clone Male Reader
Headcanons
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Reader is a clone of Plastic Man, cuz I love him.
Heyo my Hatchlings, how has everyone been doing? I finally finished up my assignment and I’m finally back. Did you guys miss me?
As a clone of Plastic Man, you put a good amount of people on edge when you appeared. Seeing as Plastic Man is very much immortal and unbeatable in the long game, they feared if you were good or evil, as there wouldn’t really be any way to defeat you if you turned out to be bad.
Luckily for them, you turned out to be as good of a guy as a clone of Plastic Man could be. You weren’t completely black and white, and sure you stole sometimes, and had a habit out of causing problems for corrupt people in power, but who were they to blame you.
You lived with Patrick Obrian, since he’s the closest thing you have to a family, and he never even had the thought of rejecting you because of your clone status. If anybody knows what its like to be judged and struggling to exist, its him.
Patrick plays an active supportive role in your life, and he teaches you how to use your powers. You end up being very skilled at the shapeshifting part of your shared powers. Sure, you still stretched, grew or shrank in size, anything Plastic Man could do, but you enjoyed shapeshifting the most. You even got a hang on switching colors, something Patrick struggled with.
When Young Justice was cooked up, you were one of the first they placed on the team. Mainly because of how powerful you were, and since part of them wanted to keep an eye on you, just in case.
You never took anything too seriously, it just came with the territory of being a clone of Plastic Man. Live life and all that. You did get into some arguments with different members of the team when it comes to morals, but that’s to be expected of a team.
When the team finds and rescues Conner, you immediately feel a level of kinship with him. Your clone status isn’t known outside of the league, so the knowledge Conner was born with doesn’t let him know you are a clone too.
As everyone tries to figure out what to do with Conner, you just settle down beside him, your stretched limbs dragging closer to you until they’re the normal length, where you offer him a snack or something to drink.
“Youd think they’d be better at dealing with clones, huh?” you joke, chewing on your own snack as he just looks at you, still confused and on edge about everything.
At his questioning glance, you lift your goggles and wink at him, pointing a thumb at yourself as you almost proudly declare yourself a clone of the best member of the justice league, if you were to be asked anyways.
As the league tries to figure it all out, you sit with Conner and just talk his ear off, never letting him wallow to far and making it harder for him to overhear the negative things said about him. Only Patrick knew, but the League fearing that you’d turn evil still weighed on you, and you didn’t want Conner to deal with the same thing.
Its only after you’ve made him smile and laugh that you accept that you’ve done your duty. When its time to leave you give him a way to contact you, and give him another cheesy wink before pulling your goggles back on, telling him that you clones should stick together.
Over time you become one of the people Conner is closest too, especially when he isn’t as welcomes by the people around him as he had hoped. This angers you and by extension Patrick, but your father figure just rolls his eyes and says he isn’t surprised.
In the beginning Conner spends a lot of time with you and Patrick, but mainly you, since you are closer in age. To be someone to look up too, you even stop with your petty crime for a while, just so your bad reputation won’t rub off on Conner.
Seeing him mingle better with the team, you take a happy step back and let him build the relationships he craves. Because of your different opinions and looser morals, you never became much more than acquaintances with the team, but seeing your fellow clone happy is enough for you.
But even as Conner gets closer to the team, he still holds onto you, since you were the first person to show him casual kindness without any suspicion or wanting something in return. You also have a lot more life skill than he does, so going to you for advice is normal for him.
When the time comes, you were most likely the one to leave the young justice team first out of everyone. You just don’t fit into their dynamic, and you run best on your own or with your father figure. Its hard to be an immortal who would never get to experience true normal life on a team of people who could.
You don’t leave the league, but you become more of a contractor, someone they call in when they need the help. You keep beating up bad guys, but you also fall back on the familiar feeling of crime. You only steal from those that deserve it though, and use your shapeshifting to easily get away with it.
It becomes a bit of a running gag, as the league always sends the young justice team after you since you aren’t an actual lethal threat. It kinda becomes training for them, and since Meghan can’t ever find you through mind powers, they have to work hard to find you.
When Conner leaves the team you to go out for drinks. Who cares about your ages. Seeing your father figure, you could be thousands of years old and never age physically, so it didn’t matter to you.
If your relationship was romantic, this would most likely be where it developed further, since Conner would be less tied to the team, and he could spend more time with you.
If your relationship isn’t romantic, it would still develop from here, just become more brotherly. You always joke you’re the batman to his superman, always shapeshifting into batman when you do, much to Conners fake annoyance.
Honestly even if it became romantic, youd still transform into batman and make kissy faces at him, since superbat is probably a running gag in the league.
You guys go on dates, even if its platonic, just to spend time together, maybe travel the world a bit, or even travel space, since you could easily survive away from earth. Theres probably also some very deep conversations about existence and your worth, since being a clone and always being treated like one weigh heavy on anyone.
When it truly hits Conner how much you struggle with your own role as a clone, he’s a bit surprised. Hed never imagined you were just completely fine, but you had always seemed to let the comments and suspicion roll off your back.
All in all, you two have each other’s back, always. The bond you have is deep in the way only two people created the same place for the same purpose can have. So, no matter if its romantic or platonic, you two become a familiar sight on and off the battlefield.
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mandukkul · 1 year
Text
TEENAGE ANGST — n. rk
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synopsis: you’re suppose to spend yet another birthday alone wallowing in teenage angst, but someone steps in and breaks the cycle
tags: non!idol!riki x f!reader, comfort, angst (not too much i think), a bit of fluff, maybe coming of age
warnings: riki doesn’t appear until like 1/3 into the oneshot, NOT PROOFREAD!!! cursing, angst (i think), spelling and grammatical errors (i wrote tbis at 2am and finshed it at 3 leave me alone), lots and lots of mis-capitalisations, tense errors probably, teenage angst 😰 , let me know if there are any more
word count: 4.7k
published: 13 July
authors note: first writing piece on here, my birthday is on september 8th but i wrote this maybe back in may
You think as a teenager, the worst thing that could affect you was teenage angst. but for you, it would probably be the least of your problems. Instead wallowing like every other teenager before you, locked deep into their rooms never to see the sun until they were 20, you decide it’s better to fix your problem with a day out. 
you’re going to be better than what the stereotype says. I mean who’s better at swimming in your own self pity than yourself of course. Even if your parents had decided that travelling abroad for months on end as a job was better than staying at home in the giant house they bought to live as a family, or leave a teenager alone instead of bringing her along, you won’t let it bother you like it did the previous years. 
Although you couldn’t feel bad, your parents were dreaming big, even if you became merely a side thought in that dream. Any teenager would live blissfully with all the materials you had. It was truly a dream, but a dream can only become reality if you make it. 
You’re not going to think so negatively and say that people around you would rather see you burn than to see you happy, even though that’s exactly what you’re saying. 
You’re a kid with everything you want, but surrounded by other kids who are and have basically the same as you, only with parents in the picture, you’re at bare minimum on the grand scale of things. 
To live your life with no one by your side, unless you count the people who dislike you at school, is harder than you think. 
But you’ve lived your life like this far too long to complain, it’s been routine to be left alone. only now, the difference is that your birthday was today. 
spending what most would say a precious day, in a house so hollow you’d think it was abandoned isn’t exactly ideal.  Being alone could only add to your ever growing list of reasons to angst over. not even you, who seemed accustomed to this trend, would want to be reminded of how alone— lonely— you are. 
so to attempt to turn a new leaf, you urge yourself to spend it differently, you told yourself. straying from your normally secretive emo self, you decide that traveling to the next suburb ,since you heard about a new promotion of the manga you liked being released in a cafe in said suburb, was a good way to ignore your ever piling problems of self-destructive tendencies. 
but oh how the world is against you, even if it is your birthday. 
The bus suddenly needs to take a detour to a different area you’re not too familiar with, then declares that the route must be canceled due to complications leaving you stranded in the middle of butt fuck nowhere. When checking your phone to find where you are, you see that you are not only an hour walk away from your house, but your phone is standing on its last legs with a messily 20%. 
To test your limits further, the sky starts to cry the moment you’re just far enough from your house that running back would do more harm than good. 
you quickly scope your area, finding that there are no parks in the vicinity to offer mercy from the rain, and the closest shelter is either 20 minutes forward to the bus stop or the array of trees planted along the side wall as decorations. 
you way your options, and take the tree closest to you as refuge. you’re glad the area you’ve wandered to is littered with them, even better that they're thick enough to offer some kind of protection. 
minutes passed and the rain hasn’t let up, going at the same harsh rate it has been going at for the past 10 minutes. your clothes, so obviously drenched, weighs you down causing your minimal moves to become sluggish (or maybe it’s the premonition of sickness approaching). 
the trees hang low with despair, mimicking your very attitude. rain licks your face, and you can’t tell whether your tears finally made its greeting or it’s rain getting into your eyes.  
you start to ponder whether running to the back home would be a better idea than your lovely tree, the idea of escaping your rain soaked clothes seeming like a dream as of right now, a dream escaping you the longer you wait. 
you test your already bad luck, because god so obviously has a vendetta against you, deciding your next best option was to end your little escapade and head back home in the rain. 
Barely ten minutes in, with wet sneakers splashing into deep puddles and your clothes glued to you like second skin, the rain starts to roar, angered by your decision apparently. 
your vision can’t help but blur due to the heavy rain clouding your sight, and the hair that stubbornly sticks itself into your forehead and subsequently, your eyes. it’s hazy and you can barely make out the road in front of you, you’re glad the path ahead of you is empty and that you’ve arrived in a more familiar area. 
I guess not even you can escape the clutches of teenage angst, slowing your strides and accepting your fate. 
you think how stupid and cliche you look walking in the rain with a frown. Your feet dragging, now feeling the effects of almost an hour in the rain, and on your birthday of all days. The only thing to complete your look was loud sad emo music. 
stopping in your tracks, letting the rain do what it wants, you begin to think back to what you must’ve done to anger god so much. 
you shut your eyes for just a moment, to shield yourself from rain trying to attack your eyes, but the rain suddenly stops, or more accurately, something is blocking the rain from you. you begin to hear the pitter patter of rain against an umbrella and just for a moment, you think god has found pity in your wallow and granted you mercy. When opening your eyes, low and behold, a black umbrella meets your face. 
oh and there’s Riki, or what he likes to be called, Niki, standing in front of you, holding the umbrella over your head acting as your current saviour. 
so much for God's mercy. 
If your day wasn’t already so bad, you’d say that seeing niki would be the worst part of your day. Unfortunately for you though, it was the best. 
you and niki have never been on the same page, ever since he ‘accidentally’ bumped into you while you were in an empty hall. you had given him many chances to be nice to you, or atleast apologise, but as days passed from the first meeting, all you’ve received was strange stares you know all too well. When confronting him, all he could do is ignore you and or play dumb.  This interaction had left a massive rift between the two of you, and being a not so popular kid  in highschool compared to the ‘king of dance’ was not a good look. 
“why are you trying to be a main character” is the last voice you want to hear from, especially on this joke of a birthday. you crane your neck slightly, meeting face to face with the face you hate (and hate to say is extremely easy on the eyes). “why are you trying to stop my main character moment” you shoot back with equally as much snark, but it comes off weak as you underestimated the sound of rain. 
Niki looks down at you with the same glint in his eye you dislike, not because it was a judgmental one, but one of mystery because you can never guess what he’s thinking. “sorry sorry, should i let you get back to that” he removes the umbrella from above you but you make no attempt to stop him. 
the rain embraces you once again, as harsh it was moments ago. you state a niki again, his dry figure under the comfort of his darken umbrella, staring at you who seemed to be physically separated from him. 
talk about rift. 
you’ve never noticed how far you were from niki, in a metaphorical sense. Niki had everything you had, and more. He had people to talk to, hang out with, care about and care for. He too, probably went through his fair share of teenage angst, but you think to yourself that this is the first (and only) win.  
he sees this and halts his movement, examining your figure deeply. you seem tired. along with the wet suit you’re wearing, and unruly hair dripping at its tips, you look far different to how you present yourself at school. nonchalant and cool, an enigmatic girl who seems to always be out of everyone’s business but as of now, you look (in the nicest way possible) like a train wreck. 
“Are you taking joy out of watching me wallow?” you scoff, staring at him with a distasteful eye, “i’m not a sadist” he jokes but he’s the only one who’s smiling. 
he coughs to clear his throat, or maybe the awkward atmosphere, you’re too tired to care. you watch as he moves the umbrella back under you, “why are you standing in the rain anyways?” he questions. 
“m trying to get home” you whisper loud enough to beat the rain, looking at Niki who’s features seem to fuzz up the more you blink. 
“don’t you live 3 streets away?” he adds, you only nodding in response.
your movements are suddenly too sluggish to call lazy, the effects of an hour in the rain finally hitting you. 
“aren’t your parents worried?” 
probably
“my parents are overseas,” you mumble as he nods knowingly, having his fair shares of travelling parents, although he has his sisters to accompany him, “and i don’t feel like spending my day alone”
birthday 
you think how this is the first real conversation you’ve had with niki, ever since your first encounter. Normally you’d stray away from him, so much as  look in your direction, you’re off to avoid further conflict and instead plan a faux argument comeback for if the day ever arrives. 
you rub your eye to rid the haze that had gotten worse, along with the bodily ache and pounding head. 
niki notices, he always notices you. seeing you off in your own world from a distance. 
“Are you okay?” he asks, his tone laced with concern, or at least that's what you think. He moves his hand to wipe some hair out of your face, attempting to help with your irritable eyes. 
Despite the cold weather, you’re hot to the touch. 
“oh shit, you’re burning up” he goes into mother mode as he touches your forehead, seeing as that’s what his sister and mother do when he has his own fever. you mumble an incoherent response, you’re not sure what you said either. 
“I should get home then” you mumble, stepping away from safety and into the rain. He goes to stop you, but the moment you move you’re in shambles, collapsing into his arms like some damsel in distress. 
oh fuck
sometimes you think to yourself, what did you do to end up here? and when i mean here, i don’t mean the literal sense, i mean the place you are in life, because for you, all you seem to do is piss of whoever’s writing your story, because why else would you be living such a shitty (but not enough to outwardly complain) life. 
The second you wake up in bed was your first red flag. the sheets a bluish grey, far different from your own floral white ones. The bed is softer, and the quilt more warm, but that might just be from the sheer exhaustion you exhibited some time ago. 
The next flag was the scary tall silhouette you see entering the room, holding what looks like a black plastic bag filled with various things. 
riki looks much more intimidating when all you can make out is his outline. 
the moment he turns around from shutting the door, he sees your eyes staring at him and the previous blank expression he wore changes into a face of concern. 
“oh you’re awake” he scrambles words together as he stalks up to for bedside, placing the plastic bag beside him as he examines your condition like some kind of doctor. 
“clearly” you croak, and you find out that your voice is extremely hoarse (and sore). 
“try not to speak, i think you have a fever from standing under the rain” he deduces but you can’t help but scoff, “gee, who would’ve guessed”. 
the sick you are even snarky than normal you. 
Niki chuckles at your comment as he shuffles around the plastic bag for a bottle of water and what looks like painkillers. 
you shift your head to watch him as he assorts the medicine and water onto the bedside table, pulling out a small mandarin to complete the collection. 
“What's with the orange?” you whisper, trying to not use your voice too much, “vitamin c” he answers simply and you can’t help but laugh at him. 
you manoeuvre into a sitting position to take what he’s giving you, ignoring the pain striking your head as you do so. 
as you pop pills and chug water, you continue to scan the room. It's pretty boring, with a table with a few pieces of stationary, and a shelf with some personal touches. 
Niki sees you’re so obviously inspecting the room, and coughs up an answer. 
“oh umm- sorry. i didn’t know where you lived and you had passed out and i panicked and brought you to my house” he explains. that explains the strange surroundings. you’re in his room. 
you think about how different his room is to what you originally assumed. no trophies, or obnoxious posters. a very standard and boring room for someone so rich. 
his voice snaps you out of your thoughts, “i’ll leave you to rest” he starts to get up and you don’t know what has gotten over you, but the moment you see him shift away, you grasp his wrist urging his attention back on you. 
he stares at you intently, as if he’d listen to the hours of silence you’d make if you chose to. 
under his scrutinising gaze, you can’t help but avert your gaze. “I don't want to spend my birthday alone” you unconsciously mumble and you feel pathetic as you hear the words leave your mouth. 
a raging silence fills the room, and your own anxiety gets the best of you as you loosen your grip around his wrist. 
the moment he longer feels your fingers against him, he reaches for you back which surely catches your attention. 
you never had a real interaction with the boy, especially due to the circumstances you (or him) were put through but your distaste for him wasn't baseless, even if your heart felt different. 
Speaking about heart, it was pounding so loudly against your chest, you could’ve sworn Niki would dance to it. 
“It's your birthday?” he’s grip on your hand is gentle, almost delicate as if you’d crack under the pressure of his touch. you nod softly, not facing him but you can tell what he’s thinking. 
you probably seem more like a loser than you already are, you feel like that at least. 
Riki nods his head, gently as to let your eyes follow enough not to be bothered by such movements. He repositions himself beside his own bed, hand still attached to yours. 
you try everything in your power to ignore his riveting gaze, but the awkwardness is much louder than the silence itself. 
you ponder to yourself, if this birthday was one of your best ones or the worse. you silently compare back to when you were six, and everyone and their friends were there. your parents seemed less concerned with otherworldly matters and you focused on nothing but the people around you. 
That was the last time you felt noticed. 
teenage angst must’ve hit you really early, huh? 
then, back to just 14, where it was yet another year alone, with no one at school knowing who you are (yet because the moment you meet riki everything had a turn for the one worse), your parents at god knows where, living their best business lives, and this is your first time spending your birthday alone (first of a few). 
you think how empty your house was, how dark and voided it felt, feeding into your ever growing reasons to angst. 
and now you think of now, despite being ill with a rising fever, you don’t feel as bad as you did back then. you can’t tell if it’s just your delirious mind putting it’s fair share of delusional thoughts into you, or it’s just because you haven’t had company in so long. but the hand wrapped around yours, and the feeling of someone (even if it’s the ever so terrible niki) next you that made you smile. 
“What are you smiling about? Are you going through shock?” niki’s voice is a mixture of playfulness and concern, because even if the chances of you suddenly falling into a seizure is low, it isn’t zero. 
your eyes trail to him, but not to his eyes, you wouldn’t dare look straight at him. 
“I thought it was going to be another bad birthday” you shrug, and you can’t for the life of you, wipe off your smile, not now because Riki finds it in himself to squeeze your hand. 
you expect another remark, because that’s all your conversations seem to be (from the single one you’ve just had earlier) but nothing of the sort came, instead, from the corner of your eyes, you see him smile. 
the nicest type of smile, with his boxy edges, and eyes squeezing softly. 
if you weren’t looking at him before, you are now. 
“I'm glad” that’s all he says, and your heart clenches at something that isn’t depression and anxiety. 
The overwhelming feeling of awkwardness has long dissipated and has been replaced with something else. 
something new. 
you stare intently into his eyes, moreso, he does and you are compelled to look back. He's searching for something, in the darkness of the room it seems like. 
you can barely make out his features, soft eyes, and sharp jaw. his hair perfectly framing his face, to much of your distaste, and is slightly damp probably from just getting back from wherever he went. 
you wonder what’s going inside that head of his, while staring so intently at you, dissecting every little part of you. does he notice the droop of your eyes, how tired you look, how pale your skin has gotten from days locked in your room, how your cheeks never flushed with life yet was always plush to the touch (probably from all the instant food you’ve consumed)
does he notice the teenage angst you wallow in, him probably going through the same trivial problems as you. 
“Sorry you have to spend your weekend with me” you whisper, thinking about all the other things the “king of dance” could be doing instead of nurturing you back to health. 
He’d probably be out with heeseung or jake at the local gaming cafe, laughing and playing. He was probably on his way there if not for running into you. 
you don’t break eye contact so you see how his eyes double in size, quick to shake his head, your own aching from following his movements. “hey don’t say that” he scolds you, taking his other hand to caress yours. 
How intimate does he get?
your skin burns from his touch, and not because your fever is bordering on 39° C. Your eyes tear away, too much of your brains disliking because, even if you dislike him, he’s very nice to look at. 
“no one deserves to spend their birthday alone” and he may be right, but your own angsty self could beg to differ. 
because with the cards dealt to you, and the way you’ve treated the world (because how it treated you) there’s no doubt there’s a love hate (mostly hate) relationship going on between you and life. 
“Even more, now that you’re sick” he adds on, rubbing circles to the back of your hand and you feel comfort for the first time in a while. 
“i guess even someone who hates me can be nice, huh?” you didn't mean to say that out loud, but your quiet voice is too intertwined with your head voice, mixed with the fact that you’re terribly sick, couldn’t tell the difference. 
he stares at you quizzingly, as if you’ve said something so utterly absurd it’s left him speechless. 
“i don’t hate you” 
those words catch you off guard. because the words “don't” and “hate” have never been uttered on the same line with “you” following after it. 
you stay silent. it’s your birthday so of course he wouldn’t uprightly say it to your face. 
“Do you hate me?”
he asks and you take a moment to ponder, about the strange stairs he’s given you, and the amount of times he’s ignored you piled with how everyone at school seems to stray away from you. 
you only hate him because he hates you 
“i only hated you because you hate me”
niki is left truly speechless (in a metaphorical sense), and his jaw is literally cracked wide. 
“what?!? I don't hate you! god! i could never hate you”
like a cringey teenage cliche, you bite your lip holding back an unwanted grin. 
“don’t say the lord's name in vain” you mutter to make light of the situation. 
not having friends didn't mean you weren’t socially inept. 
Your dry chuckle is the only sound left in the room, other than the pattering of rain. riki can’t help but frown at the news he just heard. 
“i’ve never hated you, not for a second”  he looks at you as if he’s trying to convince you, telling you that all your internalised monologues were for nothing, “i just thought… since you were so stand-off-ish, that you just didn't like me” you shrug, averting from his gaze. 
words pour out of you like vomit and you can no longer keep up your enigmatic cool girl facade, not now that you’re sick. 
“not many people like me, so i assume you hate me jusy as much, and well, if you hated me, i figured i should hate you back” 
and you did, well you tried to at least. but in moments like these; where niki holds your hand as if you’re the only thing keeping him alive, where his eyes never leave your lips because he’s so set on remembering every little detail you say, afraid your words will be lost to tone. you can’t help but not hate him at all, noy one bit. 
“how could i hate you when you’re just so perfect” he whispers, almost like a confession. 
actually he did confess. to you. right now. 
you owlishly blink, and suddenly think that your beating heart is more serious than your fever. 
you try to snatch your hand away from him, in embarrassment of him feeling how hot you feel, with the tips of your ears flaming red. 
with your averted gaze, it’s not like you can see that his neck has a creeping speck of hot red as well as his cheeks, ears, and everything on him. 
He's so glad it’s dark right now. 
“you can’t just say that, riki” it’s the first time you’ve said his name. 
his name out of your mouth, your tongue, your lips. 
He wants to hear it again. 
“Why not?” he eggs, leaning closer despite the strange territory they’ve suddenly entered. 
“Some people might get the wrong idea” and by some, you mean yourself because even with the minimal things you know about the boy next to you, your heart is fluttering like crazy it makes you want to vomit.
“But I'm not lying, you’re so perfect” Riki reiterates, “you’re so perfect, i’m afraid to even talk to you, or look at you, even be around you” he rambled at the amount of failed attempts to talk to you, caused by his shyness. 
so… everytime you tried to talk to him, walked near him, caught him staring, it was all because of some silly crush?
and now you feel stupid, ontop of your crippling angst, you’ve failed at teenage romance. 
letting out a frustrating sigh, so heavy you might even blow the poor boy away, you drop down ontop your back and whine. 
he’s shocked for a moment, watching you wail with your hands covering your face. 
he finds you so cute, his stomach might because an olympic gymnast at this point. 
riki crawls closer to you, kneeling onto his knees as he gently pries your hand away from your face. “I feel so stupid” you can’t help but utter, eyes shut to avoid his eyes. 
riki grins, leaning closer (not that you could see), “the smartest girl at school? Feeling stupid? That's a first” he jokes and you unintentionally snort out a laugh, “i’m not the smartest” you instantly shoot back, slowly opening your eyes. 
“oh but you are, you’re smart, and beautiful, and mysterious and witty and-“  you rip your hand from his grip to cover his mouth, any more and your ego will start to inflate and be as big as Sunghoon’s. “aish, stop that 
'' You laugh, and you can hear him giggling along. 
“But why? can’t i tell the girl i like how amazingly perfect she is?”
the girl he likes…
the. 
girl
he
likes
IS YOU?
“you like me…” you gape, maybe you are socially inept, or at least, romantically. 
riki laughs, and a hearty one at that. the type of laugh that comes straight from the stomach. “how could anyone not?” he says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 
like the teenage girl you are, you can’t help but feel bubbly and giddy, like the princess in some lame disney movie being swept off her feet by a guy who’s probably way too old for her (funny seeing that riki’s younger than you). 
Then guilt hits you. as much as you want to revel in this blissful joy, you know nothing about riki, and you spent so long hating on him in your head to suddenly switch up. 
“I know nothing about you though…” you break the news to him, “i mean, we technically just had our first real conversation”. 
riki can’t help but smile, even if he’s just been indirectly rejected, your gentleness in letting him down makes him swoon even more. 
“we can get to know each other then” he declares, smiling down at you. 
“But are you willing to wait?” your eyes fill with anticipation, hoping for the best (it is your birthday after all), and wonder for the first time in forever, smiling from ear to ear.
“for you, i’d wait a thousand years” 
if what he said before wasn't swoon worthy, this definitely was. 
you feel like one of his silly fangirls that wait outside of class, giggling at his stupid smile but this time, you know you’re the cause of it. 
“Are you going to start singing Christina Aguilera now?” you joke, giggling quietly to yourself. “I mean you should, since it’s my birthday after all” oh what a good birthday it was. 
“anything for my birthday girl” Seeing your smile stretch for the first time, he hopes he’d be seeing that everyday in the near future.
Riki looks at you, for what feels like the millionth time. He really looks at you, like he did at school, like he did on the street in the rain, and like he does now. 
and he thinks to himself:
yeah, I can definitely wait.
authors note pt.2: as you can see i write a lot for riki (my bias) mostly because i have so many wips that i s decided to release 🤭 might accept request who knows. also if you have any tips on how to write or do a layout please pm!!!!
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lesbianpepsi · 1 year
Text
sweet as honey | part iii
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pairing: jenna ortega x blind!fem!reader
words: 4.741k
masterlist
warnings: ableist remarks, swearing, mentions of smoking/drinking, bad writing
authors note: hey guys, i just wanna say thank you to the anons who pointed out my mistake and made me realise how insensitive my old ver of this chapter was. i have rewritten it and changed it, i hope this is better
After your first date with Jenna the two of you have gone on many, many more dates. 
By the third date you and Jenna did actually go to that restaurant you were supposed to go on your first date. 
You couldn't help but feel utterly euphoric anytime Jenna asked you out on another date or even held your hand, hugged you and kissed you. If there's a heaven you're more than sure it's with Jenna.
Altogether you've been on six dates with Jenna, and each date you could feel yourself falling harder and harder for her.
Maybe that's why when Jenna calls you on a sunny Sunday morning her words leave you stunned with silence.
"Y/n? Did you hear me?" She asks, breaking the silence. You dumbly nod your head, coughing soon after as you shake your head.
"No, yeah, I- what?" You stumble over your words with confusion as Jenna giggles over the phone.
"I asked if you wanted to be my date to the Wednesday Emmy Party." She repeats for your sake. Yet again, the words feel like a positive slap to the face. 
Jenna wanted you to go to the party with her? A party full of famous actors? 
"It's not gonna be huge, if that's what you're worried about. Just a small gathering of the cast at Joy's apartment to celebrate that the show won twelve emmys." Jenna explained in a reassuring manner, taking your stunned silence as a sign of rejection.
"Oh yeah, just a small party full of famous actors, no biggie right?" You finally say, laughing nervously. "Are you sure you want me to be your date though? I'm not exactly the same level as you guys." 
"Of course I want you there, I know for a fact Emma is dying to meet you. I can tell she's getting annoyed with how much I talk about you to her."  She says with a giggle, probably biting her bottom lip nervously as she awaits your answer. 
You let out a breathless sigh, a nervous smile on your lips. What's the absolute worst that can come out of it?
"Okay, I'll come as your date." You finally answer her question, your smile turning into one of relief as Jenna immediately starts saying 'yes!' over and over like an overused child finally getting the toy they've been begging for.
You chuckle as you nod your head, biting your lip. 
"You talk about me to your friends?" Jenna groans through the phone as you laugh, a smug smile on your face. 
"Shut up." Jenna replies through a small laugh. "The party is on Wednesday, I'll pick you up?" She confirms as a small static sound rippled through the phone.
You snort a laugh at the day, finding it much more ironic than Jenna was. 
"Yeah I'm free Wednesday and Thursday, so it doesn't matter if I get hung over." 
"I didn't know you were so rebellious to drink under the legal age." Jenna teases you, her voice becoming more static on the phone. You rolled your eyes as you scoffed. "Like you didn't admit to being hung over when recording a scene in 'X'." 
"Stalker much?" She quips back with a dry laugh. 
"Oh yeah because I would be such a stalker with my binoculars, staring and following you around the place like a peeping tom." 
"Oh whatever, I'll see you Wednesday?" Jenna replies, you chuckle as you nod your head, as if Jenna could see you.
"I'll be waiting." You say with a nostalgic smile. "I won't make you wait too long." She finished with her own soft smile.
—————
"I'm so fucking nervous." You complained with a groan as you dropped to sit down on your bed, rubbing your sweaty palms against your jeans. "All of them are actually famous people. All of them!"
Delilah -your childhood best friend- chuckles as she patted your shoulder. "You're overthinking it, babe, they're just a bunch of dickheads who are known while we're a bunch of dickheads who aren't known." She tries to reassure you but it simply went into one ear and right out through the other. 
"But they're Jenna's friends, if they don't like me then Jenna might lose interest in me." 
"You're crazy if you think that. Everyone can see she's head over heels for you, hell, the media even knows." She replies swiftly as she squeezed your shoulder with a reassuring squeeze. 
You turned your head to look at hers. "Well I can't see that, can I?" Delilah shakes her head as she laughs softly, loosening her hand on your shoulder before you feel her take it off.
"Then you can hear it in the way she speaks to you, it's as if she's the one who's speaking to a famous actress." Delilah says as she stands up from the bed, picking up the dishevelled clothes off of your floor and folding them for you. "If it is shit then just give me a call and I'll pick you up, okay? I'm staying the night here anyway so it's not an issue."
That's true, Delilah had to ask to sleep at yours since she had a fight with her own girlfriend Claire, and like the good friend you are you told her obviously she could crash at your place.
You sigh as you nod your head at her words, running a hand through your hair. "I guess you're right." Delilah smirks at you as she opens the drawer full of clothes, neatly keeping the now folded clothes. "Of course I'm right." 
Abruptly, loud knocks are heard from the other room. You let out a rigid breath as you stand up stepping towards your wardrobe as you grab your cane. 
"Wish me luck." You ask Delilah as you run the cane along the wooden floor, heading towards the living room. "You won't need luck." She replied with ease as she walked alongside you to the door.
Opening the door for you, Delilah stood by your side as she grinned at Jenna. 
The brunette looks slightly surprised at Delilah but she doesn't stop smiling as she gives an awkward wave.
"Hey, nice to meet you, I'm guessing you're Delilah?" She asks as Delilah nods her head with a grin. "The one and only. Nice to finally meet you Jenna, Y/n talks about you very often." 
You not so subtly elbow her side as you smiled at Jenna, walking out of the apartment as you naturally went to grab her elbow. "She's more delusional than me, ignore her." You tell Jenna as she giggles, looking back at Delilah who leaned against the doorway waving at them.
"Have a great time, remember curfew is at midnight, young lady." Delilah teases as you and Jenna walk towards her car, rolling your eyes under the glasses as Jenna giggled once again. 
"So you talk about me to your friends, huh?" Jenna jabs at you playfully as she opens the car door for you, reciting your words from Sunday's phone call. 
"Shut up." You grumble as a soft blush attacks your cheeks. "Bullying the blind is a very cancelable thing, you know."  
Jenna is the one to roll her eyes this time as she smiles, taking your cane once you've sat down on the car seat.
She joins you in the front soon after she keeps your cane in the back seat, revving up with its surprisingly quiet engine.
"So who's at this supposed casual party then?" You ask her with a curious face as you nervously play with the hem of your shirt, a habit you've picked up since you were little. 
"Emma, Hunter and his husband Fielder, Joy, Georgie, Steve, Naomi, and Johnna and. Oliver can't come since he's currently filming another movie which is in another country." Jenna lists off as she drives towards Joy's apartment, where the party was being held. "I told you it isn't a massive party, so don't worry. Plus they're all very excited to meet you." She reassures you once again, at the same time she speaks, you feel her place a hand on your thigh.
You smile as you lay your hand over hers, gently caressing your thumb along her knuckles.
"I'm just as excited to meet your friends too, even though I'm shitting bricks over it." You say afflicting a chuckle from Jenna, you feel her squeeze your thigh in an attempt to calm you down. "If you feel uncomfortable at any moment just tell me and we'll leave early, okay? Nobody will shame you or be mad."
You let out a gentle sigh at that, a bit relieved at her kind words. "Thanks Jen."
Jenna smiled at your side profile briefly before she turned back to focus on the road. 
The rest of the car ride was full of mindless conversations between you and Jenna as the low music of Hozier filled the rest of the car. 
As usual, when Jenna parked the car she went to grab your cane before opening your car door open for you, and just as usual you gave her a small kiss in gratitude, resulting in Jenna having a soft blush on her nose and cheeks.
Jenna's elbow is already out for you to latch onto with your non-dominant hand. She double checks you're ready before the two of you make your way to Joy's apartment which thankfully has elevators since she lives on the ninth floor.
"I think they're playing UNO, right now." Jenna mentions as the two of you entered the elevator, her pressing the button '9' as the soft hum of elevator music filled your ears. 
You dryly laugh as you lean against the metal wall as the doors close. "Don't think I'll have much of a chance of winning." Jenna rolls her eyes as an amused smile rises on her face.
"Don't worry, they get distracted so easily that I bet they'll forget about it within five minutes." She says as she moves to stand by your side, leaning her head on your shoulder as you grab her elbow gently, drawing small circles on the clothed skin with your thumb. 
You chuckle at her words. "So they aren't like you then, little Miss Competitive?" You tease.
Jenna can get quite competitive, that's something you picked up quite quickly. Whether it be board games, video games and especially with football (or soccer as she calls it). 
"Oh no, Georgie is even more competitive than me. We once played one match of monopoly that lasted two days in total. In the end we had to call it quits but I was so close to winning." Jenna replies confidently, as if she was truly the one who was going to win.
You chuckle as you nod your head, turning your head soon after to place a feather light kiss to her head. "I don't doubt that for a second." You whispered with a low chuckle before pulling away from her head, leaning your head back against the metal cold wall of the elevator.
The elevator dings loudly as the door slides open, a robotic voice coming through the small intercom telling you and Jenna that you're on floor nine.
With a nervous smile you and Jenna make your way to Joy's apartment, Jenna knocking loudly three minutes before entering.
Music hits your ears the moment the door opens, the familiar voice of Lady Gaga filling it up even louder as you enter further into the apartment.
Your nerves spiked as you heard the chatter get loud and louder as you and Jenna walked into the living room where you could smell the strong scent of tobacco mixing with alcohol infiltrating your nose.
"Hey guys." Jenna greets the group, their heads instantly snapped towards her voice as you and her stood side by side. "This is Y/n, my-" She stops, not knowing what to say.
You haven't asked Jenna to be your girlfriend. Jenna hasn't asked you to be her girlfriend.
"-date, she's my date." Jenna finishes swiftly as she grins proudly at the fact you're her date.
A mix of "Hey, Y/n" and "Hi"s are thrown around the room by a myriad of different voices.
"Hey, Y/n, nice to meet you! Finally I can put a name to a face." A feminine voice speaks up, her voice sounding as smooth as a pearl. By her voice you guess you guess it's Emma Myers, one of Jenna's closest friends.
You chuckle aa you turned your head in the direction of the voice. "Wish I could say the same." You joke, hoping, praying they'll laugh at it rather than freezing up and wondering if they should or not.
Thankfully a snort of laughter is heard along with a few gurgles before the person laughs even harsher than before, coughing loudly.
"Jesus, someone take Naomi's drink away from her." A more masculine voice says this time, chuckling as he does.
"That's Georgie, the one who sucks ass at monopoly." Jenna whispers in your ear as she guides you to a free spot where you and her can sit on the couch. 
"I heard that." The voice you know as Georgie speaks up from close to where you sit. 
"Well, it is true Jen was winning and you were on the brink of bankruptcy." Someone else speaks up with a slight slur in their voice, indicating they've definitely drank a few before you and Jenna arrived.
"That's Johanna, she's a lightweight." Another voice speaks up before Jenna does, the voice is coming from beside you making you turn your head in the direction. "I'm Joy by the way." She introduces before she points at Hunter and Fielder who are sitting on the floor. "Hunter and Fielder, our local gays are currently sulking on the floor since they lost at Uno."
"I only lost because Hunter got me out." A deep voice says which you presume is Fielder's voice. "That's only 'cause you're the worst at Uno." Hunter replied with a smirk as he took a sip of his drink.
“I’m Steve.” Someone else announced from the other side of the room. You turned your head in the direction of the voice as you smiled politely. “Hi Steve.”
“Fielder might be bad at Uno but you lost seconds later, Hunter.” He remarks as he ate some of his chips from a bowl.
You laugh lightly as you loosen your grip on your cane but don't let go. Now knowing everyone's voices gives you much more confidence.
"Thanks for having me over, by the way, and congratulations on the twelve emmys." You say with a smile as you turn your head to look at the direction of where the music was coming from.
"No need to thank us, we're all more than happy to finally meet you after Jenna has been chatting our ears off about you." Joy replies, sipping her wine as she smirks at Jenna.
You grin as you turn your head to your side where Jenna was sitting. "So not only you talk Emma's ear off about me, but to everyone?" You jab playfully at her once again, Jenna's cheeks turn a scarlet hue shade as she turns to glare at anyone who laughs at your words.
"They're being dramatic and they're drunk, they don't know what they're talking about." She murmured trying to sound annoyed, but she had a small smile on her lips the entire time. "Sure." You remarked with your own smile.
Your fear and anxiety dissolved as the minutes passed, your fear that Jenna's friends wouldn't like you absolutely thrown out of the window.
Well that was until two hours passed.
You were in the middle of a conversation with Emma as Jenna and a few others such as Naomi, Georgie, Fielder and Johanna had left the room to go smoke on the small balcony near the kitchen. 
As Emma finished her sentence you felt a tap on your shoulder, jumping slightly your turned in the direction of the touch.
Steve chuckled awkwardly at your reaction as he plopped down next to you, forcing you to move up on the couch.
“Can I ask you a few questions about, you know?” He asked you with a slur to his voice, his breath having a strong smell of alcohol which definitely confirmed that he was quite drunk.
You nodded your head as you smiled at him. “Of course, and you can say blind, it's not like it's a bad word.” He rubbed the back of his neck as he laughed.
“Aight, cool. So do you know what Jenna looks like or what any of us looks like or are you completely blind?” He questions curiously as he sips out of a beer bottle with a burp.
“I lost all eye sight when I was in my teens so I don't know what any of you look like.” You explained to him before adding. “I did get a description from Jenna on how she looks, so I’ve got a pretty good idea in my mind.” A soft smile forms on your lips as you think of the memory.
On your fifth date with Jenna, you went over to her apartment for the first time and Jenna cooked for you an incredibly delicious meal. 
That night Jenna let you explore her body but it wasn't in a sexual way. She was wearing a shirt and jeans the entire time as your hands roamed her body as she described herself to you in great detail. 
She held your hands as she placed your hands on different parts of her as she described herself in detail to you. 
Her hair, her face, her neck, her arms, her waist, her stomach and even her legs. There wasn't anything sexual about the interaction, it was only meant to be viewed as something soft and intimate. 
Steve hummed as he dropped his now empty beer bottle to the ground, yawning as he lazily turned to look at you.
“Okay, okay.” He mumbled. “Why do you wear glasses inside then? Is it ‘cause like blind people's eyes kinda get nasty after they turn blind?” 
“Steve.” Emma whisper yells as he gives the drunken boy a look. He raises his hand, faking arrest as he rolled his eyes. “Jeez Emma, chill. I’m only asking questions and she said she was alright with it. Didn't you, Y/n?” 
You decided not to take his words to heart before you nodded your head. “It’s fine, honestly.” You reassure her with a sweet smile. “Before I turned fully blind I always wore sunglasses since it would reduce the glare from the sun and could help me much better with seeing with the small sight I had. After I completely lost my vision I guess I just never stopped taking them off, and I guess it’s because I also don't like how my eyes look.”
“That's fair. I mean no offence or anything but blind people’s eyes just look so creepy.” He replied with a lazy smile as he chuckled, moving his hand to scratch at his small beard. 
“Don't be a dick, Steve.” Joy voices up from her seat, glaring at the boy momentarily before going back to talk with Hunter. 
He scoffs slowly as he ignores her, deciding to see how far he could push you. 
Not knowing what to say you awkwardly laugh as you shuffle further away from him. 
After a few moments passed you presumed he was done speaking to you but you were unfortunately proven wrong the second you opened your mouth to speak to Emma.
“I couldn't imagine being blind, it sounds proper shit and miserable.” He says with an exaggerated sigh. “I mean you can't even see your girl, you only have to imagine her.”
“Steve, stop.” Emma repeats again as her voice becomes more firm. You swallow down your emotions as you try to give a small smile.
“Life isn’t automatically bad just because I’m blind, I actually love my life and wouldn't exchange it for any other life.” You reply trying to keep your emotions at bay and not let his words affect you. 
He sighs dramatically once again as he shakes his head. “I dunno man, being blind sounds shit. How're you supposed to even please your girl if you don’t even know where she is without her speaking?”
“How’re you supposed to please your girl with your one inch pinch?” Hunter remarks, sounding annoyed as his eyes narrowed on him. “Just shut the fuck up.” 
Steve snickered as he narrowed his eyes back at Hunter, crossing his arms over his chest. “Jesus, people are such snowflakes these days.”
As Hunter and Steve get into a heated argument you lean closer to Emma, in a whisper you ask her, “Can you please go get Jenna?” 
She nods her head immediately as she squeezes your shoulder in a silent agreement, standing up moments later and heading towards the kitchen.
“We’re not sensitive, you're just being a blatant asshole to Y/n.” Joy intervenes as she defends your honour, you smile in relief as you scoot further away from Steve, the grip on your cane tight. 
“I was just asking the blind chick some questions, is that a crime now too?” He asked in a mocking voice as he now turned to glare at Joy. 
A blind chick? Is that really all he saw you as? 
You swallowed nervously as your fingers began unconsciously tapping against your cane, a small frown on your lips.
“Why are you being such a dick?” Hunter asks him with his voice becoming more gruff. Steve laughs in disbelief as he turns to look at you. “You said you didn't mind my questions, true or false?” He questions you with a click of his fingers. 
You didn't know what to say as you tried to open your mouth, no words coming out as you felt incredibly uncomfortable by the entire situation. 
Steve scoffs as he clicks his fingers at you again acting as if you're a dog and he’s your owner. “Are you dumb as well?” He asks you in an annoyed tone.
“What the fuck did you just say?” A voice that reminds you of heaven says darkly, storming into the room. You sigh in relief as you gingerly put your hand out for Jenna to grab, to which she holds onto instantly, interlocking your fingers. 
You stand up next to Jenna as you grip your cane tightly.
He shakes his head again as a breathless sigh escapes his dry lips. “Nobody can take a joke these days.”
Jenna scoffs angrily as she glared at him. “Jokes are meant to be funny, I hear nobody fucking laughing, Steve.” She snarled as she ran her thumb along the skin of your hand. 
“That’s ‘cause you all can't take a fucking joke, nobody appreciates dark humour these days, fucking hell.” He grumbled, glaring right back at Jenna as he crossed his arms over his chest. 
You're frozen in place as you listen to the unfolding argument, your heart speeding up uncomfortably in your chest. 
“Apologise to Y/n right now.” Jenna demands dryly, not breaking eye contact with him. “If she can tell me where the remote is then sure.” 
Jenna’s grip on your hand tightened as her jaw clenched at his words. Fearing the argument was going to escalate quickly you tug at her hand making her break the staring contest to look at you with concern. 
“Apologise to my girlfriend right fucking now.” She growled out in a venous voice, her eyes never leaving the boys. 
Your heart stopped at her words as your eyes widened under the glasses. Girlfriend? Jenna thought of you as her girlfriend?
The two have an intense stare off as everyone else in the room holds their breaths, not knowing whether they should stop the argument or let it be.
Steve scoffs as he takes his eyes off Jenna standing up, laughing drunkenly with a shake of his head. “Fuck this, I’m out. This party was too lame for me anyway.” He announced as he headed towards the apartment door, slamming it shut behind him. 
Nobody moved, nobody uttered a word; all frozen in spot as to what just happened. 
You couldn't help but feel a sense of guilt crawling up your spine at the argument. If you didn't come none of this would've happened. 
Swallowing down any emotion in your voice you shakily slipped your hand free from Jenna’s. “Can you take me home please?” You gingerly whispered to her, your head hanging low. 
“Of course, I’ll go get my keys.” She replies instantly leaving the room to go retrieve her keys from the kitchen. 
“It was really nice to meet all of you.” You say, turning your body to face where the rest of them were, a weak smile on your lips. “I’m sorry for the whole mess and leaving early.” 
Emma moved to squeeze your shoulder momentarily as a sympathetic smile toyed on her lips. “You don't have to apologise for something that wasn't your fault.” She informs you.
You sigh as you nodded your head weakly, trying to let Emma’s words win the battle against your guilt. 
“We need to hang again, but without Steve this time.” Georgie says making you and a few others let out a weak chuckle. 
Jenna waltz back into the living room moving to your side and you quickly latch onto her elbow with a weak grip. 
“Thanks for having us over.” She says to them as she gives them a soft smile. All of them smile back as Joy nods her head.
You and Jenna make your departure without another word; no words being exchanged between you two as you head into the elevator.
The moment the doors closed in the elevator Jenna let out a sigh before she pulled you into a bone crushing hug, you're almost surprised you didn't drop your cane at the sudden movement. 
“I’m so sorry he said those things to you, Y/n, you didn't deserve any of that.” She whispers in a feather light tone of voice, her small arms surprisingly strong as they wrapped around your waist.
With one hand you wrapped it around her neck as you smiled a weak smile. “I know but it's okay, I promise. People say stupid shit all of the time especially when you have a disability; you just have to learn to not take it to heart.” 
“But he shouldn't have even said any of those things to you.” She added, removing one arm from around your waist to place her soft hand on your cheek. “You out of everyone don't deserve anything like that.”
Your heart melted at her words, nodding your head weakly. “I don't care about what he said, what I care about is what you said.” 
Jenna cocks her head to the side confused as she gazes at you. “What?” She questions confused, not knowing what she said.
“Apologise to my girlfriend right fucking know.” You quoted with your smile growing on your lips. “Last time I checked I didn't even know I was your girlfriend.”
Jenna’s cheeks turned a scarlet red shade of embarrassment as she let out a little. “Oh.” 
You giggled amused at her words as your fingers played loosely with the hair at the back of her neck. “Oh? Is that all you have to say?” You teased her before adding in a whisper. “Ask me.” 
“Ask you what?” Jenna asks, confused as she leaned into your touch. You rolled your eyes under the glasses as you paused your movement. “Ask me what I think of being called your girlfriend.” 
Eager to know your answer Jenna repeated your words with ease as she smiled nervously. “What do you think of being called my girlfriend?”
You smirked as you leaned even closer to her, your lips hovering over hers as you whispered. “That it's the only thing I've wanted to hear from you since our first date.” 
Jenna’s lips immediately connect with yours the second you finish speaking, sighing against your lips as she pulls you even impossibly closer to her.
You've never had what you'd describe as "perfect" in your life. But now to you, Jenna is the epitome of it. It's how you've always wanted life to feel, calm, and content; and you have that when you're with Jenna.
—————
taglist: @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @canvascoloredin @alexkolax @wol-fica @caitlynscat @jyucejpg @omega-horus @andsoigotabutterfly @fanboy7794 @jjsmaybank20 @zhasmindoesntknow @jujuu23 @214-sofa @ssinfulprayers @nitchxhdc
if you wanna be added to the taglist comment and i'll add you:)
authors note: i hope this was better
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pro-sipper · 9 months
Text
"Dead Dove: Do Not Eat"
About the tag, the origin, and why I think no one on either side of the fandom divide knows how to use it
First of all, I'm crosstagging because I think it's a general issue, not just something for pro or anti shippers. I see the tag get misused on both sides and I just wanted to throw my two cents in
So, where did the term originate? Like all culturally significant things online, it started as a meme. More specifically, a meme from the television show Arrested Development. Character A has put a dead dove into a brown paper bag to store in the family's fridge. On the bag, he has taped a sign that reads, in big bold letters, "DEAD DOVE. Do Not Eat!"
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Character B comes across the bag, reads the warning, and opens it anyway. When he's met with, you guessed it, a dead dove, he proclaims "I don't know what I expected".
This is an example of (and has since basically become the spiritual successor to) the "Exactly What It Says On The Tin" trope.
If you want to check out the full history and countless examples of the trope, please check out the page on tvtropes. But for a slightly shorter history - it originated in a British commercial for Ronseal's Quick Drying Woodstain, which the tin claimed "dried quickly". And in the commercial they told you "It does exactly what it says on the tin!" So, the tin says what the product does, then the product does it. You get the idea.
In fandom spaces, the trope just means that the title of Thing (be it movie, show, fanfic, etc) tells you exactly what happens IN Thing. If a show is called "Buffy The Vampire Slayer", you already know it's about a girl named Buffy who slays vampires. If the movie is called "Cocaine Bear", you can bet a bear will get into some cocaine at some point. If there's a fanfic called "Fluttershy Has Tea With Jesus"... you get the idea.
While both tags started out with the same intentions and meaning, I don't think it's any wonder that "dead dove do not eat" has been so easy to misinterpret. For one, "exactly what it says on the tin" sounds more straightforward. You don't have to understand the specific reference to infer it means to check the label (in this case, tags) before purchasing (opening) the product (fanfic)
But dead dove is harder to understand if you don't know the reference. And at a glance, it sounds much darker. Doves have symbolism in multiple religions, and are seen as a symbol of peace. A dead dove evokes images of gore, violence, general unpleasantness. It must only apply to something sinister, right?
The thing about "exactly what it says on the tin" is that the tin needs to say something. You can't point at a blank label and say "here's what you can expect". People would be much less likely to engage with your product if that were the case
In the same vein, slapping "dead dove do not eat" on a fic with no other tags can lead to confusion. In this tag's case, it's a warning. But what are you warning about if you don't also put it in the tags? It leaves people's minds to conjure up only grim and upsetting images of what might be in your fic. Especially when, as it's also common to do, the tag gets shortened to simply "dead dove".
And while, yes, the tag is most likely to get slapped onto fics with dark or upsetting subject matter, that means something different for everyone who comes across it.
Most people seem to think it only applies to inappropriate relationships (age gap, incest, etc). But I've seen it applied to a variety of things, from potentially triggering material (like suicide) to things that simply may not be everyone's cup of tea (like excessive gross-out toilet humor).
In the end, "dead dove do not eat" is a tag that, in my opinion, should not be used as a descriptor as to what type of content your story contains. But rather, a gentle warning to say "hey, I'm specifically telling you what you're about to encounter, so whatever happens next is up to you".
After all, if you read the warning and still open the bag to find something you don't like...
I don't know what you were expecting.
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inbarfink · 2 years
Text
The deaths of all the Finch kids are really so unbearably tragic. It really speaks to the quality of the writing and storytelling in ‘What Remains’. They’re written as so vivid and human and real, but also so many of them died so young. They were children, it’s so much harder for me to do the whole ‘well, let’s appreciate the life they did have’ thing when the majority of them didn’t even have a chance to become the people they could have become. And yet the image of who they could’ve been if they survived is so vivid in my mind. 
Edith had that line about how she always imagined Molly as a girl she could be good friends with. Obviously if she didn’t die back in 1947 they wouldn’t really be at the same age group, but she’d be one hell of a Cool Aunt. I can only imagine her Weird Girl tendencies would’ve only grown stronger and stronger with age. Considering her fascination with animals, maybe she would’ve gone to study Zoology or Biology when she grew older? And since she was dissecting a sea star just before her canon death…
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Sadly, I’m not sure if Barbara would’ve been able to resurrect her acting career. But there’s some subtle hints in her room that in reality she was more willing to move past it compared to her fictionalized version in that horror comic (which can’t be easy when you live in a room your dad themed entirely around your child-star years THANKS SVEN). That ‘horror convention’ seems to be an invention of the comic, Barbara’s actual room has a flier for a ‘Witch’s Ball’ at Orcas Island High School and a dress ready for it. 
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Barbara Finch didn’t actually spend her last day on earth hopelessly trying to revive her dead career, she was hoping to have a fun Halloween party like a regular teenager. Maybe the fact that it was hosted by the Orcas Island High School Drama Club implies she still had an interest in acting and theatre. Maybe she could’ve ended up as a classically trained actress with the child-stardom as just a fun quirk of her past? Or maybe she just wanted to take part in the Witches Ball because she likes Spooky Things? And she could have found her way back into the Horror Scene in a different way, like being a writer or costume designer or something?
Maybe Calvin could’ve become an Astronaut like he always wanted? But I think Calvin might’ve been more enthralled with the fantasy of science fiction than the reality of space travel. I’m thinking a lot about how Sam described Clavin in Gregory’s memoriam as ‘lost in his imagination’. Maybe he could’ve become a science fiction writer or something?
Walter didn’t technically die young, but he still certainly lost most of his years to the Curse. Like, a big thing about the tragedy of Walter to me is realizing his original childhood bedroom was themed after “20,000 Leagues Under the Sea” and trains. 
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Lil’ Walter did have an interest in adventure and travel, before his fears took it all away from him. If it wasn’t for the Curse, Walter could’ve actually something with it. Maybe he could’ve traveled around a bit and written about his experiences.
Lewis would’ve probably gone into game design. It’s not just how his fantasies manifest to us the players, but you can actually find books about game design and coding in his room. It seems that the problem was that his crappy job and his depression took away any opportunity he might have had to actually pursue this idea. Maybe if Milton never left, these three Finch siblings could’ve combined their creative skills together to make like, a very cool artsy game.
Speaking of which… man, Edith’s death stings the most because we got to know her far better than anyone else. And it’s not even the fact that she never got to share her all of her thoughts and creativity with the wider world that makes me the saddest. Getting to the end of the game and hearing just how much she was looking forwards to be with her son - even with all the hardships of being a teen mom, she was really looking forwards to it. To meet him, to share her stories with him. But instead, that worn old diary is the only connection between them...
And that’s like… part of what’s so great about WRoEF’s use of its own format. Like, the faux-interactive linearity of the Narrative Exploration/‘Walking Simulator’ is so perfect for selling this tragedy. The way each Death Flashback only moves forwards based on the actions of the Player, but it always moves on the same unchanging doomed path - really highlights both how stupidly preventable so many of these deaths feel and really make the Player wish there was a way to change them. After all, all they need is for Calvin to not swing so hard, for Gregory’s faucet to not turn back on, for Walter to not stand directly on those train tracks and everything would’ve been fine. But at the same time it’s so, so clear to the Player that this is an impossible wish. There is no other way these sequences can go - these deaths have already been written. The most you can you is linger, all you can do is delay the inevitable. 
But it hurts.
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jymwahuwu · 1 year
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Imagine reader's child with yan!tighnari turning out like their dad
Like imagine reader hinting to their children that they weren't happy with the marriage by telling stories but their children snitched on them and told yan!tighnari Abt it bc they saw it as their mother trying to leave them
IT WOULD BE SO FUN TO SEE DJJEJS
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tw: yandere, non-con, implied kidnapping, spanking, orgasm control, breeding, knotting
yandere Tighnari breeding reader that rejects them part 1
part 2
this is amazing... who doesn't like being punished by Tighnari - with the fox babies it's much harder for you to leave🤭💕
With Tighnari and the fox cubs, life in the forest is peaceful. Fox cubs love to snuggle up to you, mutter "mama" in soft voices, bury their heads in your arms, and the fur on their ears always tickles your chest - and your heart too. You brush and clean the tails of the Tighnari and the babies and apply plant-based waterproofing oil. You like to pet their tails and ears. Every time you do this, the fox cubs involuntarily purr but then deny this.
Tighnari has produced some learning materials for children and you are responsible for teaching them to read, one of the ways is to tell bedtime stories.
"What did you dream about last night?"
"In the past, people in this country could not dream, but now when the God of Wisdom enters the dream, all of us weave dreams…"
One of the cubs said they dreamed of inexhaustible padisarah pudding on the table, you smile. Unfortunately, you find out that all the storybooks have been read. They have inherited the wisdom of their father - they never forget a story they have heard once. You must have new stories to lull them to sleep…
You have an idea, speaking with metaphor.
"In the kingdom of forests and deserts, there lived a bird.
They have wonderful singing voices, and their goal is to become the lead singer among the thousands of birds, offering songs to the sky and stars. However, this is too difficult. They lived with songs, and in the woods there were larks, nightingales, canaries… some of them were mean, but some were kind, and their songs were said to be the best.
They thought they were one of them.
But one day, they found out that they were just ordinary finch, bouncing around the ground, sharing food, singing with other companions - that's their usual life.
They still don't give up, dreaming that they too can achieve their goals.
At this time a fox told them: Do you want to live with me? The life of a bird is too ordinary. Life is more than singing.
They refused.
What they don't know is that the fox has a big cage ready for them. At night, the fox sneaked into the forest quietly. He found them resting on the tree, and the cage covered their bodies. Their singing has since disappeared into the woods.
Living in a fox cabin, they don't need to compete with other birds, there is enough food, gifts and beds, but they kind of miss the sky and the smell of rain. That's what they lost.
One day, they escaped from the fox's house and took to the sky while the fox was not looking. They flapped their wings and sang in the sky, attracting the attention of other birds - they were surprised to find that one of them had such a melodious song.
However, they no longer care about other people's evaluation - they left the forest where they lived, flew over towns, mountains, and fields, leaving sweet songs everywhere for everyone. "
After hearing this story, the fox cubs pouted, a little sullen. "mama, why is the fox in this story a bad guy?"
"That's just a coincidence. The little lion was the villain last time." You smiled and kissed their little foreheads. "Good night, my babies."
The next day, Tighnari returned to the forest from the seminar, and the fox cubs jumped into his arms, yelling "papa!". He hugged them and gave them presents - some new toys. Under study, they are already smarter than many children of the same age at this time.
"Papa, are foxes bad?? Does mama want to leave us?" one of the cubs asked. The cubs recount last night's story to Tighnari - though they don't quite understand parts of the story, they have a vague sense that you want to leave the forest.
"Oh, there's such a thing." Tighnari raised his eyebrows, and there was unknowingly meanness in his tone, but then disappeared, comforting the babies gently. "It's okay, mama is just telling you stories, and won't leave us."
For you it's another attitude - he's away for two days and you're signaling to the kids that you want to leave? Does this mean you already have a plan? unacceptable. Entering the house, Tighnari greets you and casually asks what story you told the babies last night. He notices you avoiding his gaze - "You really don't have anything to confess to me?"
"Wait, my- my story doesn't mean that!" You panicked in denial.
Tighnari does not accept excuses of any kind - punishment is a necessary part of your education since you are so stubborn, chasing your unrealistic dreams.
He orders you to bend over, slips a vibrator into your wet inner wall, and rubs his thumb along the edge of your glistening flesh. The little machinery buzzes and vibrates deep within you. You whimper and beg him to stop. "Please- please- Tighnari I'm sorry- I won't do this again…" You try to keep your balance in the shock, but the ruler appears and smacks your ass hard. The slapping lands on both of your ass cheeks, and it's never in the same rhythm - when you think your left ass is about to get spanked, Tighnari smacks three times on your right.
Tighnari rubs between your legs after a round until orgasm is imminent, then starts a new round, leaving you in deep despair. You can't remember exactly how many times you took it, basically a mess of tears, legs shaking and a stooped posture. "I- I'm so sorry…!!" he asks you in a mean, veiled, sinister voice. "Do you still want to leave? Is there anything more comfortable than getting my cock? Hmm?"
"No- no! I just need you - Tighnari-" you gasp, unable to choose your words. You just desperately want to be released, to be filled.
"Okay," he muttered, sinking his already swollen long cock deep inside you, pounding you hard, rubbing his fingers on your clit. You scream, tears and juice splattering the table, pleasure flowing through your body, your walls contracting.
"Maybe I should give you some other babies." Tighnari announced as knotted inside you. "You won't have time to leave."
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quillthrillswriting · 5 months
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my (quillthills) ao3 ATLA fanfiction masterlist:
"if happiness were a tangible thing, it would be you":
Katara is tired of the iron grip that Emperor Ozai has over the kingdom of Rosas, tired of watching him spread his influence across the mainland. When Sokka comes home from the palace with the knowledge of an impending tragedy, Katara is left to wish on the stars in hope that they will offer salvation. They do, in the form of the Avatar, a boy transformed into a wishing star almost a century earlier. Her wish for hope is fulfilled, in the form of a boy known to be the embodiment of hope. Will that same hope be enough to stand against a man powered by the dreams and wishes of an entire kingdom? OR: ever since pixina put the idea in my head of a kataang wish AU, i haven't been able to stop thinking about it. this fic is the result<3 if you haven't seen wish (2023) yet, don't worry! you don't really need to to understand this fic:)
"so i will go to secret gardens in my mind":
after he and katara's escape to the palace gardens the night prior, avatar aang, the king of all four elements, cannot stop thinking of the beautiful dark-haired water princess. misunderstandings and deliberate deception constructed by regent ozai makes the reconciliation of these star-crossed lovers more complicated than necessary. OR: the second of many kataang regency-era works ♔
"you’re in the wind, i’m in the water":
aang has only just been crowned as the avatar, the king of all four elements, and already, he struggles to find his footing in a society without any of his people. a dance with princess katara of the water tribe, and a subsequent escape to the palace gardens, helps him find that footing. OR: the first of many kataang regency-era works ♔
"there's a star-man, waiting in the sky":
a flash-fiction atla modern AU in which yue passes away from cancer early in life, and sokka becomes an astronaut so that he can go to space and be close to the moon she always loved so much ☾
"the teenager in the iceberg"- multichap
i feel like a lot of people have wondered how different atla as a whole would be if aang had been older, so in this au, aang was frozen at age 16! naturally, i just had to flip aang being after katara from day one to katara now having a crush on aang from the very beginning. essentially, to recap. ATLA aang aged up AU fic. kataang. where she falls first, and he falls harder. also, cmon. i just had to write a new version of the scene where zuko and aang meet.
"you with the dark curls, you with the watercolor eyes"- multichap
Avatar Aang had been told time and time again that to venture across the surface of the sea when the moon had risen and claimed what rightfully belonged to it was to sign your own death certificate. And yet, he found himself here, at the water’s edge, skipping stones, lost in thought. To be the Avatar had once meant something, years before. Before the four tribes had separated, scattered to the ends of the earth. Those who formed fire itself chased the other tribes from the surface lands, those who could move rock and metal burrowed underground, those who flowed with the air sent ships with great sails across the sea until they reached towering mountain spires. Those who bent water, who bent blood… they retreated to the depths of the sea, and with time, they became a part of it. Legend told of the way in which the Water tribes had adapted, two legs smoothed into razor sharp scales and voices twisted into something dark and luring. Now, they were the monsters known as sirens. OR: a KATAANG AU where tui and la have split the earth into the sea and the sky. aang is a winged avian, while katara is a siren<3
"well, my (not-yet) boyfriend's in a band":
in which the gaang are in a band, and when it comes time for them to write an original song to submit to the republic city music festival, aang is...suspiciously good at writing love song lyrics OR kataang, if they were in an indie band and aang didn't know how to communicate his feelings except through writing love songs
"i’m no longer a kid, and everything has changed":
after aang falls to azula's lightning strike in the caves of the earth kingdom, toph, sokka, and katara are left to pick up the pieces. katara's healing abilities are put to the test in the weeks that follow, but she finds herself seeing aang in a different light as she realizes how much he's endured since emerging from the iceberg only months before. OR: the weeks-long gap between the end of season two and the beginning of season three of ATLA is finally at least partially expanded upon. ALSO OR: a bit of aangst, or kataangst, if you will
"can you see me using everything to hold back?":
Katara's life after saving the world was filled with a whirlwind romance with Fire Lord Zuko that became a loveless, controlling marriage she is no longer happy in. After finding out the extent to which her husband has betrayed her trust, she escapes to find home in the person she has missed most during her time in the Fire Nation. OR: The common Zutara trope of "Zuko helps Katara escape an unhealthy relationship with Aang" is flipped entirely and completely on its head.
"my heart is yours, it’s you that i hold on to":
The war has been ended, Ozai has been rendered helpless, and Zuko has reclaimed the Fire Nation with the promise of peace. Everything that Aang has been working towards since the moment Katara freed him from the iceberg has been done. He's saved the world. Now, all that's left is to confess to his forever girl. OR Aang wakes up the morning after him and his friends saved the entire world, and the first (and only) thing he can think about is Katara. When they get a chance to talk, the two take a walk down memory lane.
"shining down on me":
sokka can't stop thinking about yue. she comes to him in his dreams, and try as he might, he just can't move on. inspired by the song "my love, mine all mine" by mitski
"the avatar's adventures in parenting":
aang being a bad parent is CHARACTER ASSASSINATION and i won't stand for it. i just know that him and katara wouldn't be focused on just passing on bending, but the *teachings* and ideals of both of their tribes to all their children, regardless of bending status. OR, aang and katara become parents and aang finds out that parenting is his proudest achievement, more so than stopping a hundred year war or holding the position of avatar
"i'm trying to tell you something, something that i already said":
katara speaks to each member of the gaang individually and finds out that aang has been head over heels with her for years and no one ever bothered telling her. this takes place after the fire lord is defeated, but in my version, they never kissed in the finale:oo katara is basically dumb in terms of love and so is aang and they are peak miscommunication trope and theres too much zutara content and not enough kataang OR katara interrogates each of her friends (toph, sokka, and zuko) and comes to the conclusion that she has lived for years without the kind of love most people wish for their entire lives
if any of these speak to you, they can all be found on my ao3 account:)<3 happy reading!!!
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merakiui · 1 year
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mera!!!! Im thinking abt first time bf riddle who is a cute tsun but its bc u give him such cuteness agression and he's lowkey a prude but repressed horny and wants u so bad but he doesnt know how to initiate things, maybe he even plans for u two to lose ur virginity to each other, so romantic, but he has no idea you and stepbro trey already popped eachothers cherries years ago and have been fucking sinc e >_<
OTL on one hand I am devastated for Riddle because he’s just starting to dip his feet into sexual situations with you and he’s becoming more comfortable with PDA, but omg you’ll destroy his world if he ever finds out you’ve been fucking your step-brother this entire time. :( on the other hand, I am cheering for Trey because AAAAAAAA he’s so normal, so sweet and sane, and so you wouldn’t expect him to do such a thing. He can hide it well because no one ever thinks to question it. He just gives off such sweet big brother energy, even if the two of you are only a few months apart in age.
It started when you were kids, entirely innocent. Holding hands on the way to school. Sharing snacks. Sleeping in the same bed. Playing together. Trey has always loved his siblings. He’s the best brother anyone could ever ask for! He’s always looking out for you, always putting a smile on your face, always making sure you’re happy and content.
But then his hands are still pursuing yours even when he seems too old for that stuff. He could get away with kissing you on the cheek when he was little because everyone found it utterly adorable and affectionate in a platonic way—and it was! But when everyone in his class was gossiping over men and women in risqué magazines all he could think about was you, his lovely step-sibling who walks home with him every day, who helps his mother and father in the bakery, who agrees to take baths with him even if both of you are at that age where you’re going through puberty and so it’s “weird” to be that close with your sibling.
For a while, it’s all experimental. First kisses are practiced sloppily. You and Trey sit on your bed and watch porn to try to better replicate the movements. It’s so awkward, but he’s painfully hard the entire time and before hands can wander any further you’re shoving him away, too embarrassed and shy to try anything else. He’s left to deal with his erection in the silence of his room, consumed with thoughts of you. On the surface, no one would ever know Trey lusts after you so ferociously, but then no one really knows Trey. They don’t know him like you do.
Family gatherings are dangerous because when it’s so busy in the house you and Trey lock yourselves in the bathroom or hide in the closet to practice kissing and touching. It’s so you’ll be ready for your first relationship—that’s what both of you claim. But you’ve kissed so much that at this point the excuse falls horribly flat, and neither of you really believes it.
When you both reached adult age, rather than rebelling and drinking like some of the people in your class often did, you and Trey have sex. It’s nothing exciting. If anything, it’s more wandering hands than actual bodily connection. Trey’s fingers curl up inside of you, and you dig your nails into his forearm and hiss at him to go deeper, harder, faster. Trey loves you too much, so he does everything you ask. You weren’t intending to go all the way, but “just the tip” gives way to Trey slotting himself all the way inside, every inch swallowed up in your tight hole. <3 and he doesn’t mean to cum so early, but in just a few thrusts he’s spilling over because god you feel so good and you’re squeezing him so ruthlessly and you’re a crying, moaning mess and the way you wrap your legs around his waist to pull him closer drives him insane… his name is so sweet on your lips. He wants to hear it forever.
You and Trey have always been close, but no one knows just how close that truly is. So when you’re giving Riddle head for the first time and he notes your technique is too skilled (or maybe he’s just so sensitive), you have years of experience under your belt to guide you because you’ve sucked your step-brother’s cock too many times in the past. And even now, when you kiss Riddle and leave him breathless and yearning, those same lips find Trey’s once you return home from your date and he fucks you against the door, the wall, on the floor, like a starved animal. You really do love Riddle, but then you love your step-brother just a little more and that’s a bond that can never be broken. <3
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venomroses · 8 months
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Zones Fashion
Obviously we all know how killjoys dress, but not everyone in the desert is a killjoy. So here's my headcanons about how non-killjoys in the desert dress. Below the cut because this is gonna get long:
Note: Edited this so rb this version please!
These forms of dress are specific to smaller, more isolated groups where people are usually at least 1st gen zoneborn, and doesn't apply to neutral towns, killjoys, those who follow more traditional city styles, etc. Also I know I said I was going to do drawings for this and I might add those later but for now just text bc the drawings aren't coming out how I like.
Younger kids (2-7):
Both girls and boys have long hair because protects them from the sun without trying to get them to keep hats or hoods on since kids can be difficult about the required amount of clothes, let alone additional stuff. It can also be hard to find children's sized clothes, so many guardians don't bother with "unnecessary" items. Hair is usually kept long enough to tie out of their face because kids also make lots of messes, but sometimes hair will be a bit shorter (usually for boys).
Younger siblings will rarely have anything that isn't a hand-me-down, so if you have an older sibling of the opposite gender then you're probably going to be dressing like the opposite gender for most of your childhood. This is rarely an issue since gender doesn't usually have the same relevance as it does in the real world.
Long skirts are common regardless of gender because they keep the legs covered to protect from sunburn. Also, you can grow significantly before an ankle-length skirt becomes too short, unlike pants where you just have to get new ones when you outgrow them. When skirts get short enough to start exposing a lot of skin, extra fabric can be sewn on, or leggings can be worn underneath. Wraparound skirts are preferred because you don't have to adjust the waist at all when the kid grows, so you don't have to worry about buying/making new clothes all the time. However, other types of skirts work just as well.
A lot of younger kids get homemade shoes. They don't need to be great quality, they just need to keep the kid from burning their feet. Once a kid is old enough to begin helping with the family business (if there is one), go on trips with their guardians, etc. they get real shoes since it becomes more important once they're working or away from home for longer periods.
Then older kids (8-12):
At this age kids are old enough to want to have more freedom of expression so styles vary a bit more.
Since they're mostly still wearing kids sized clothes which are harder to find in the Zones and outgrowing things quickly, hair is still usually kept long to protect them from the sun in place of a hat or a hood that would either be too big or outgrown too quickly to justify buying it. However, sometimes they'll get their hair cut short, especially boys. Regardless of length, there's more variations in hairstyles, since it's a form of expression that doesn't cost any money.
Skirts often come above the knees in the front for more mobility/range of motion. Kids this age are old enough to help with work or chores, so it's easier if they don't have to worry about the restrictions long skirts can bring. At this age skirts are less about practicality. Long skirts are seen as a more childish style as the main point of them is to let kids grow without needing to buy tons of new clothes all the time, and skirts of any length can be impractical. Some guardians don't see the point of the skirt if the kid is just going to be wearing pants underneath anyway and the kid transitions into just wearing pants. For those who do keep wearing it, it makes their ages and allegiances clear. Since "adulthood" is pretty much "whenever you look like an adult" or "whenever you can do the same work as an adult" it makes it clear that this is a child, and that they're not a killjoy (since some killjoys can be this young).
Again, kids this age usually aren't working actual jobs yet, so sandals are more common than closed-toe shoes that might be required for a more dangerous job. Sandals are preferred over closed-toe shoes since they take less supplies to make so they're cheaper. These sandals might be homemade or might be made more professionally.
Younger teenagers (13-15):
This is the age where you'll see a lot of actual variation in style. First short haircuts are common at this age. Some kids might have a job, so hair length is usually depending on the job they have instead of gender. A job where they're often inside or where long hair would get in the way? Short haircut. A job where they're often outside? Long hair. Of course, some people will still pick a style they like over practicality, but looks over practicality is a very killjoy-esque mentality that most of the desert does not follow.
Outfits vary a lot, again based on what's practical for work, but it's common for their clothes to be a bit oversized, since they're usually still on the smaller end even if they are wearing adult sizes by now.
Some kids still wear skirts to indicate their age if their guardians feel that they're not ready to be seen as an adult, but many wear pants only.
Most kids have close-toed shoes now, but again they might be a bit too big. Rags can be stuffed in the toes until they fit properly.
Older teenagers (16-19):
Can pretty much look like anything! Just like for younger teenagers, haircuts and forms of dress are more specific to what you're doing, since most people have some sort of job at this age. Skirts are not worn anymore.
Jobs often work like trades, where you learn to do something and make that your career, instead of switching between them a lot. A lot of jobs are making necessities like clothes, candles, and food, or services like doctors/nurses, messengers, etc. Sometimes certain professions go together, like gunsmiths (who can make or fix guns) will work with artists for killjoys or anyone who'd rather have someone else paint their raygun for them. Markets are a great place to sell their wares so a lot of vendors there are going to be people like this.
If you're interested in other types of people in the Zones/time periods and how they dress send me an ask or something bc worldbuilding my beloved <3
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kimhargreeves · 1 year
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Until The Very End -Shion x Reader (Hell's Paradise)
Summary: Prepared to head to a dangerous place with criminals, you find yourself not only fighting them but another powerful being living in the forest. Your Master being not that far away from you, always willing to protect you no matter what.
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(So I finally decided to give Hell's Paradise a chance since I saw an image of Shion and Tenza and decided to continue watching the anime. Stayed up until 4am and in all honesty I would've loved episodes 8 trio to be the main characters. I find them more interesting than the actual ones. So, here I decided to write a one shot of Shion, just things are a bit out of order at the end but it's how I decided to write it. Prepare the tissues!)
I stared down at my sword, blood slowly dripping onto the light green colored grass. The person laying on a puddle of blood wasn't one of my team, but a criminal, he was once wanted for killing women in specifically in front of young children, delivering their heads to the male of the house and enjoyed watching them suffer for their loves ones.
It was clear as day that I wasn't fond of who I was teamed up with. He sensed this too, so he tried to kill me when he believed I was distracted once we had traveled across the angry waves of the ocean separating us from our next destination.
The man thought he could kill me, but he was too weak, he was scared when he saw me swinging my sword. Scared because for the first time no one was capable of killing him, he used to suffer watching innocent people die, and he found one innocent who thought would do the same.
"Gross, my sword is dirty again." I cleaned the blade with my sleeves and quickly hid my sword back.
I smelled the air and could smell iron, the smell of blood nearby. I continued to walk further until I saw the body of one of my comrades. I knelt down on the ground and said a small prayer.
Though I wouldn't get along with a few, most of them were good men. I frown looking at the ground and felt a pang on my chest, Eizen. He was the second person who found me back in the day when I needed help, the first one being Shion.
I still remember the day when I met them both. My life wasn't easy from an early age, I worked harder than most men, slept very little and ate when I could find any leftovers.
Life is truly a living hell, full of anger, sadness and lots of death, but at the same time it's beautiful…
"Hope you find peace in the afterlife." I muttered and got back up on my feet.
Quickly I left the spot hoping to not come across another demon and find any of my teammates back again.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
From an early age I felt like I was born to suffer, to not have a full filing and happy life. I don't remember much of my childhood despite going through a lot, but what I do remember is at the age of 12 I was sold by my family.
They are a family with plenty of children, but onto had boys, six boys and a girl when I was born. "A woman has to provide for their family, bear children and do what society tells them to do." That's all I ever heard from my parents.
Despite being still very young, I decided to take another path. I started following in my father's footsteps and my brother's, trying to fit in and train like them, I used to stare in awe when I saw them fighting to become soldiers.
I felt like I could be like them, brave, being recognized for their strength and traveling to get the job done.
The day I turned 12, the exact same day I was sold to a house. My parents said they had no use of me if I wouldn't be of help to them, so they did what was easiest to them.
If they didn't have money, then why did they have so many children?
I was terrified that day, held back my tears as I was dragged to what would be my home, no my work place. I was sold to become a prostitute, entertain men at a young age.
The house was full of beautiful but broken women, wanting to escape their reality just like me.
The people in charge of the pleasure house were anything but kind, but at least they knew I wasn't ready. They said I was still to young to be of service, so I stayed in that home for two more years.
When I reached 14 I was told that my age was appropriate, I was ready to become a woman. Many men had entered the place, some flirting with the woman and others simply enjoying their meals or drinks.
"This one is your newest girl." The madam of the house introduced me with a fake name for my protection.
"Isn't she a bit too young?" I heard a man ask
"A-Ah yes! But it's a woman's job to serve.", The madam replied. "Tonight will be a special night for her."
I panicked hearing those words, when that happened I accidentally spilled tea onto her lap and earned a strong hit from her.
"Stupid girl! You're no help to us at all!" She let her anger towards me known.
I excused myself and quickly left the room as I held my cheeks and felt my eyes stinging. I wanted to run away, leave this place for once, I didn't care if I were to die the next day, I'd rather be dead than live a life others want to control.
"Are you alright?"
I glanced back and took a good look at the man who spoke back inside. He was a bit taller than me, with scars over his eyes and across. Is he blind?
"I see you're upset. It's okay to be."
I guess he was trying to joke at the first sentence, but I could feel calmness coming from him. A pure air coming from him.
"You're planning on running away aren't you? I think you should, I can see that they treat you badly. A child as yourself shouldn't be in these conditions."
I made no effort to talk, afraid that I might get hurt for talking to a man who si clearly higher in status than me.
"Here take this, it's the least I can do to help." The man had in his hands a kunai. "I hope for us to reunite in the future." The man waved and smiled down at me.
My eyes widened and I simply stated at him amazed, hopeful, he was the first person to help me. That person was Shion.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
That same night I ran, stole enough money for a few days, had my new weapon in hand and left to never return to that miserable life. That night was finally the night I could finally cry after years of holding my emotions in.
I went into hiding and cut my hair off to dress as a boy. It was the only way to get a proper job and to be treated differently.
So, I trained myself simply by watching other men doing their job. I got myself baggy enough clothes that would hide my figure and I worked selling carbon for a while until I was adopted into a family of an elderly couple.
"This young man is simply impressive. He'll grow up to be a fine soldier." My adoptive parents said.
It wasn't long after I told them my secret, both were concerned over me but they accepted me when I swore to protect them and continue to provide for them. They loved me nonetheless, both their kids were killed a long time ago, so they treated me as their own.
My adoptive father had worked in the Yamada clan in his younger days, seeing my potential he was the one who helped me grow stronger and eventually when I was 16, I was accepted into joining a clan.
I continued to hold onto my kunai, hoping to see the man who gifted it to me. I held the item dear to me, I blushed whenever I would remember him. Though he was just a few years older, I hope to see him again.
So, I went to one of the strongest in their field. I continued to dress as a boy and fooled everyone. I continued to train and eventually met who would be my master.
I was now a part of the Yamada clan, accepted to finally become a samurai.
I remained still in a line waiting with the rest of the newest members and I gasped when my eyes fell on the figure of a talk man with silver hair and scars. My heart began to beta faster than usual, after years I finally saw him again. He grew up to be a lot more handsome.
I was just a child when I met him, there's no way he'll recognize my voice of who I am. Men, soldiers like him are focused on their jobs, nothing more.
"(Y/N), step forward." I did as told and stopped closer to him and was now face to face. "From now on Shion will be your Master. You will obey his orders and train your hardest, let's hope and see what they say about you is true."
I nodded my head and bowed. "I look forward to become your partner and train to be as strong as you!"
The man remained silent and when I looked up I could see a faint smile on his lips when he rose up from bowing his head as well.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
Weeks went by and training was indeed hell, but I've endured harder treatments. This is nothing to me, I swore I would grow stronger to prove my parents my worth and to impress, Shion. To show him that I grew to become a strong person because of him.
The blush across my face would be apparent everytime Shion would pass by me. The rest of my team would be confused as to why I would become all flustered. Eizen a man with long dark red hair, I remember him as the one who gave me a bit of money when I was working at the pleasure house.
He was the first one to accept me here and he helped me in choosing the proper tools so my sword would be made.
My back was hurting along with my legs from the amounts of hits I would receive from still training. So, I decided to soak in the river by night time when everyone was asleep.
I winced at the pain when I undressed myself and soaked into the water. I scrubbed myself and cleaned my hair, I realized it was growing a bit longer than I would've liked since I would get caught being a girl.
"What are you doing here so late?"
I screamed and quickly rose up from the water and turned to face Shion. I covered myself quickly.
"I can't see anything, remember?" I saw Shion smiling when he crossed his arms over his chest.
Quickly I reached for my robes and placed them on me. "What are you doing here?" I said making my voice lower, still a blushing mess.
Though he didn't see me, I felt like he did.
I noticed Shion still smiling, "Don't worry your secret is safe with me, (Y/N)."
I gasped and felt my lips tremble and tears beginning to run down my face. "Y-You remember?" I held my chest tight.
Shion nodded his head, "Of course. How could I forget? You were in need when we met years ago. You were just a child, suffering and alone. I imagine you out that kunai to good use?"
His voice lowered and I nodded my head. "I still keep it with me, I….thank you.." I was at loss for words.
After so many years he still remembers me.
"I won't tell your secret, but I don't understand why you would do it. You should let your true self known, if not you'll continue hiding who you really are. Prove to everyone that even if you're a girl, you are capable of standing even more."
I raised my hand up to touch my hair, Shion is right.
"I won't treat you any different. From now on I am your Master and you are my student. Our bond will only grow stronger, no matter what happens we have to be there for one another."
Tears continued to fall down my face. I sniffed began to wipe my face in a hurry. "L-Let's head back inside before they notice we are gone."
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
The village was suddenly attacked one day, most people passed away and so did my adoptive parents. I was left with no one but Shion now, he took me in as now onto his student but to live with him.
I was 20 now and still working and going on missions. Shion and I continued to train but everytime he would win or we would match, I wanted to finally win him but failed everytime.
Over time I grew confident of myself and was accepted when I revealed I was really a girl, some accepted and some did not. But, thankfully I wasn't the only girl.
It didn't take long for me to finally have a student of my own, but I would always consider Shion as my master. My student was resting after suffering a broken ankle but he said he would quickly recover.
Not only did I have a student, but Shion had taken another one in. He had once around the same time he started training me, but info he had to end his once students life when he chose the wrong path in life.
Now a young man known as Tenza was his student. He remained sitting next to my student and began cheering for me to defeat Shion
Both of us quickly dodging ones attacks or almost being able to hit each other.
"When are you finally going to defeat me, (Y/N)?" Shion asked almost bored at the amount of times I've told him to fight me.
I huffed and continued to lunge forward with my attacks when Shion easily blocked his sword from my attacks.
I grin and didn't fall back, "Ha! I'll defeat you one day and when that day comes, You're definitely gonna become my husband and marry me. You'll see!" I exclaim.
Earning odd looks from my student and Tenza. "There she goes again with the flirting. Just marry already!" Tenza shouted.
"I don't think Master Shion might feel the same.." my student making me gasp.
Over time I became confident in myself, and my needles flirting. Shion must've taken this as a joke but I was blurting my true feelings for him known when it was mostly just the both of us alone
In a sense I guess it was a way to repay him for everything he's done for me. Everything I said was the truth, I only wanted to die back then by Shion gave me a different view in life. It may de forbidden between us, but I want to marry him if possible in the future.
"Master..quit embarrassing yourself." I heard my student mutter and hide his face.
"I think it's fun seeing them together." Tenza continued to say.
Shion tilted his head and sighed loudly. "Let's see you try then."
I swung my sword back to my sword and blushed when looking back at him. I'll surely defeat him someday..we ended the fight in a watch and went back to meet with our students who continued to tease me.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
Tenza was with the criminal known as Nurugai, surely they mustn't have gone so far. I sniffed the air and could smell two nearby. I began to run faster through trees and spotted two familiar figures.
"Tenza!" I exclaim and I saw him turn back and smile at me.
"(Y/N)!"
We raced towards each other and the first thing Tenza did was hug me and blush. The girl besides him pouted, "You hug her and not me?"
The criminal pouted I stopped hugging Tenza and turned to the criminal. They seem tiny to be a guy..and doesn't seem like a threat at all. Seems very nice.
"Ah, don't worry! Tenza is a friend of mine. You'll have him don't worry." I smile and see Tenza blushing.
"Don't say those embarrassing things." He sighs and stepped back.
I look at them both and saw they weren't harmed. "Everything alright?"
"Yeah, still looking for what we came here. It feels like we've been here forever."
The three of us began walking together hoping to find any clues and trying to not come across demons.
We remained together in the meantime that was until we finally came across, "Shion!" I exclaim finally seeing his tall figure appear.
I ran forward and felt the need to hug him, but it would unprofessional. The last time I hugged him, I hugged him so hard he almost passed out. He did always say I almost an immense strength.
"Shion! It's so great to see you again." I said blushing.
"I knew nothing would happen to you, Master." Tenza said as we all surrounded Shion.
Shion nodded at us both, "Seems like you've been on your own, (Y/N). What happened to your prisoner?"
"He decided to attacks me, so I swiftly killed him before he had the chance to harm me." I inform him and showed no sign that I was scared.
"You've grown to become an exceptional woman, (Y/N)."
Shion praised me! I smiled wide and felt my entire face turn red. "I-I just did as you told me to, nothing more!"
I closed my mouth and we all turned around and remained silent when we felt the air getting heavy, something isn't right. "What's going on?" We remained silent and suddenly a woman appeared before us with bright orange and yellow hair.
One of the denizens.
The woman quickly turned into a man and started to attack Tenza. Tenza began to slice the demons arms, head and eyes out. The four of us beginning to run away when we began to leave the demon behind.
Tenza, Nurugai and I were quickly running ahead since Shion had thrown his sword at the demon and it pierced it leaving it on the floor with the sword onto the tree.
"We're pretty far away." Shion said when we all reunited.
Both Tenza and Nurugai were out of breath. Once Tenza regained his breathing he eagerly turned to the young boy, "Nurugai, now that this guy's here, we'll be okay."
Ouch. I stared silently glaring at him, "Geez thanks, Tenza."
Tenza shivered and began to chuckle awkwardly. "Don't take it as an offense! It's just.. he's more experienced than you."
"A-Anyways, Nurugai! I owe Shion my life, and he taught me how to use a sword.
Tenza received a light smack on the head by Shion's sword. "You were relying too much on your speed, and your movements were sloppy." Shion began to scold Tense for his actions.
"I could hear how lukewarm your lungs were, too. Each strike should be executed carefully." Shion continued to scold and hit his student.
"Nonetheless, I'm glad you're both alive. Last time I saw you both was on the ship."
Tenza rubbed the back of his head still looking at Shion. "Wait a minute, Master. What have you been doing by yourself?"
"After finishing my duties, I tried finding a way back home, but found no current. There's only so much a blind man can do."
Shion said and I watched him begin to take his sword out until he aimed it boy next to Tenzen. "It's your turn to explain. Why are you protecting a criminal? You were told to execute criminals immediately. That's what I did. She tried to seduce me. So I executed her."
I flushed furious and grabbed Shion's arm and began to try and move him back and forth but he wouldn't let go of the sword.
"How dare you let a woman sit on you like that! Was she beautiful?!" I was now rocking him back and forth with Tenza trying to get me to stop but was now protected Nurugai.
Shion didn't seem to mind me continue to try and push him away since he didn't even move. "Care to give me an explanation, Tenza? Depending on your answer I'll execute the order."
Tenza was deep in thought until he began to say and remember when Shion took him in, how he said Tense had the probability to make this a better world and how kid Shion actually is and wouldn't do it.
To that Shion smiled and pulled his sword back. "Yay! We knew you were a good man!" Tenza and I exclaimed with Nurugai looking at us weirdly.
"I knew you had it in you, Master! You were the one to save us from our previous lives after all!" I praise reaching out and grabbing his arm and holding onto him tight.
Shion didn't seem to mind the action so he said nothing.
"If protecting her would threaten the Yamada clan or you…"
Our mouths fell open when Shion said "Her." I glanced back at what I thought was a boy and back at Shion.
"What's wrong?"
"Her? I'm impressed you figured it out." Tenza said, making me smack his back.
"You knew she was a girl and didn't tell me?!"
"I-I thought it was kinda obvious!"
I look back at the now girl and was surprised by my stupidity..how can I be so blind and not realize it?
"Of course I did. I've got a good eye for evaluating people." Shion said smiling to himself. "I'm honestly surprised (Y/N) didn't know about it sooner, considering she was crossdressing back then."
Tenza tilted his head and sigh, "You sure go love making jokes like that, being able to see."
Nurugai in her spot was now embarrassed between both men. "Nice to meet you, Master." She said looking up at Shion.
Shion lowers down to her level. "Nice to meet you, Nurugai. But you needn't call me 'Master' I haven't taught you anything."
"You can call him Master if you'd like!" I exclaim at Nurugai as I wrapped my arms around Shion's arm again. "Shion here will become my future husband!" I said making the young woman smile.
Shion sighed but smiled down at me and patted my head. "Whatever gives you the motivation I guess."
Tenza stood between us and smiled as well. "Okay then! Let's not waste any more time. We have to see how we get back and face that things back there-"
"Don't underestimate me." We all looked back and saw the thing that attacked us. Shion grabbed the three of us and pulled us back further until we were at a safe distance from the demon.
"Master Shion!" I knelt down with me and held onto Shion when we saw blood pouring from his neck.
"Huh? I thought I'd taken his head off. Not bad." The demon said almost bored.
I glared at it when it's in it's female form. I took off my scarf I always had with me and tightly but carefully ties it around Shion, making sure he could still breath and to stop the bleeding.
I remained by Shion's side and looked up to see Tenza taking care of the demon, I've heard about them, Zhú Jin. Tenza began to get deeply hurt with blood quickly covering his uniform, I can't let this happen. I placed my hand against Shion's back and I forced a smile and stared lovingly down at him.
Tenza had been bleeding since the demon continued to attack him, Shion's throat was almost cut where it would've killed him. Zhú Jin continued to hit Tenza many times but it kept on rising back and fighting.
I am determined to kill him.
Forgive me Master. I quickly rose up and began to move forward and I pushed Tenza aside and shouted for him to get back to safety.
"You almost killed my friends just for fun. Prepare to die!" I swung my sword forward and groaned when Zhú Jin seemed to enjoy this.
I watched it move quickly and continued to fight with its hands. I felt a strong pain in my chest and I fell almost to my knees and began to couch, blood came out, my hands began to shake when I saw more blood on them. Am I seriously in danger? Will I die? No, I won't. I promised to continue to live and to marry Shion.
At the same time it had sliced me, it also sliced my sword, easily breaking it in half.
I took out the kunai from my uniform and held onto it, He..she..no they are powerful, very strong but I'll make sure to kill it. I won't let Shion, Tenza or even Nurugai die.
Holding onto the kunai tightly I began to dodge the demons attacks and jump back when it almost hit me again.
"(Y/N)!" I heard Shion and Tenza shouting my name. Nurugai not far ahead wanting to help as well, but she would be easily killed if she were to get in the way.
"I'm close to killing! Don't worry I can handle it." I lied feeling my limbs heavy and growing tired of keeping up with the demon. Zhú Jin continued to bleed heavily but kept on regenerating the wounds.
I've never seen something fight this so strong and faster. A human and a demon, the demon will surely come on top and kill the opponent.
Tears began to form in my eyes as I continued to hold onto my kunai and try to continue standing.
"Quit fighting, (Y/N)! You'll only get yourself killed!" Shion shouted for me.
I forced a smile on my face and now felt the tears flowing down my face. "Then I'll die then, if it means that you and Tenza make it out alive then I'll happily give up my life!"
The demon continued to easily dodge my attacks. I kept on fighting with a smile on my face, remembering the many times Shion and I spent time together with my student and Tenza all together.
I cherished spending every time I had with Shion. Wether he saw me as a friend or not. If I were to someday reincarnate, I wouldn't mind going through the same if it means that I would meet with Shion again.
"Take Tenza and Nurugai with you!."
"(Y/N)!!" I felt bad hearing Shion call out to me, no scream my name. I never him so angry before.
"I'm grateful I got to meet you, Shion." I whisper and I looked over to him and smiled with tears running down my cheeks.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
"(Y/N)? What are you doing?" I heard Shion coming to join me outside once we had finished working for the day.
I enjoyed the sun light and stared up at the beautiful cherry blossoms and felt so peaceful being here, like this with him. I felt a nice breeze and saw the beautiful sakura petals falling down from the trees and onto the ground.
"The cherry blossoms are especially beautiful this season. It's a shame they don't last forever.." I said staring up and smiling staring in complete awe at the flowers.
What wouldn't I give to stay like this forever and enjoy my life with Shion by ourselves.
"Wouldn't it be lovely to get married at a time like this?" I joke knowing he mustn't feel the same for me.
I enjoyed the seasons cool breeze and felt a few sakura petals land on my clothes and hair. I hummed surprised when I felt Shion's hand on my hair, picking up a sakura flowers that fell on me. He moved my hair to the side and placed it above my ear.
"When this is all over. I'll make your dream and wishes come true."
I gasped lightly and stared up to look at Shion smiling down at me with a slight blush across his face, I blushed as well and smiled wide looking at him as I placed my hand above his.
"We'll get married then and have lots of children."
Shion continued to smile as he nodded, "I did swear to myself that I would find and be with you until the very end."
Shion and I held hands until I felt him leaning down and pressing his lips against mine.
🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸
I stared at the demon surprised and I felt a sharp sensation inside me, y eyes slowly wandered down to my chest shocked looked at the demon, the being expressionless. The kunai I had saved so dearly, was stabbed right through my heart.
"Shion…I.."
I coughed up blood and began to feel weaker and dizzy. I began to stumble a bit but could feel someone trying to say my name, I looked to the side and smiled at Shion.
Though already defeated I wanted him to know that I would depart this world happy and not scared or sad.
I heard footsteps running away and could see Tenza and Nurugai being taken away from the scene. I finally fell down to my knees and couldn't sense a thing, strange I've received many cuts and had a blade through tm heart but I can't feel a thing.
The being known as Zhú Jin held onto my hair tightly when I fell down to my knees and kept looking down at me, displaying no emotions whatsoever.
I could see his lips moving but couldn't understand what he said. He let go of me making me fall onto my own puddle of blood on the grass. I fell to the side and could feel my body getting cold and numb.
I was now alone. I fell onto my back and stared up at the bright blue sky and it's many beautiful flowers. I know Shion will be alright without me, he's a strong man, despite many years of being lonely and feeling worthless.
Shion was the first man, this person to ever show me kindness and love. The only man who I ever fell in love it. Someday.. we'll meet each other again and no matter happens I'll continue to fight for and with him.
My eyes adjusted to the clear sky and I felt my breathing beginning to slow down, and slowly I wrapped my hands around my necklace, the cold ring resting against my chest.
Don't give up one hope, Shion. I'll continue to protect you just as you did with me. I smiled to myself and slowly felt like I was being embraced by my adoptive parents, their warmth around tm shoulders.
I will continue to love you Shion…until we meet again.
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olderthannetfic · 10 months
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please, send help. i (23y/o) think i am getting to a stage where I need to be a Cool Aunt TM for my niece (13y/o). She's been a bit too online since she had to move around a lot. She had a bit of antis mentality, but i'm trying to pull her away from it slowly. At the same time, she's been around the internet, reading 18+ yaois and shit. I did the same at her age, so I can’t say I don't understand her. But as an adult idk how to talk about this 18+ healthily with her? or do I even need to? should I leave her on her own devices? I didn't have an adult to talk about these things with growing up so idk how you're supposed to do this.
There is not way to say how my parents or sibling (her mom) would react if I drop this on them, could be +/- , but it's a bit of a lottery depending on the most recent online articles they read lately. lol. They're open to convos, but a bit religious.
I'm taking suggestions if anybody would like to give some.
P.S. I am also not a cool person, i'm pretty much a lame homebody so… i also don’t know how to be cool lol.
im so sorry idk who else to ask.
--
Ahaha. Well, don't try too hard to be ~cool~. Nothing could be more offensive to the sensibilities of a 13-year-old.
A well delivered "Oh, come on, no one really thinks that" and eye-roll in response to the more delusional anti stuff has a wonderful effect if you're offline and the person respects you. Humans in general and 13-year-olds in particular are hypersensitive about fitting in. A boring and serious lecture from an older person will set off every melodramatic "The old people don't understaaaand!" instinct, but a well-timed "LOL, WTF" causes internal panic that one has missed something. If she wants the serious and nuanced explanation, she can ask for it, but I wouldn't start there.
As for how you talk about raunchy art... it really depends on the person. If she realizes you like the same stuff, she may bring it up. I think recs are fine, and so is euphemistic "I liked the ship dynamic in this one". "I got off to this" is TMI on your part. (Well, it's TMI on her part too, but be prepared for TMI if you become the confidant of a 13-year-old.)
Honestly, as long as she's directing the conversation and you aren't sharing details of your masturbation habits, I think you'll be fine. 13-year-olds aren't babies. If they're old enough to read porny doujinshi, they're old enough to talk to a trusted adult about them.
My teen tastes were weird art films full of sex. 13 is pretty young, but within a couple of years, she'll be the age I was when I was trying to see shit like Crash. She could be anywhere from self-assured in her tastes and interested in discussing her favorite media to easily-influenced to paralyzed by guilt. Creepy grooming shit comes from groomers choosing to groom, not from the topic of sexuality being in the air. If she's reading something with even a shred of plot or romance, you can talk about that without the actual conversation being X-rated. My main concern would be to avoid her trying to impress you by consuming media she finds uncomfortable or talking about things she doesn't actually want to share. You can really only judge that by body language and tone of voice in the moment.
I mean... does "18+ yaois" mean actual BL series here that have a few sex scenes or doujinshi that are entirely porn? ('Yaoi' basically means 'PWP' and is not exactly complimentary, after all.) It's somewhat harder to talk about the latter. But I liked some pretty out-there shit as a teen and did talk to adults about it. They just let me do most of the talking.
Probably the easiest way to broach the topic is to catch her reading something and go "Oh, I read that one" or "I liked [name of BL]".
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