#it is once again getting warm where i live and i have to mentally prepare myself for at least four months of being annoyed

[queenerdloser]

once again asserting that the simple air conditioner remains humanity's best invention and i am including literally all technology when i say that

[moonstruckme]

i am so BUMMED when i realized ive read all of your polymarauders works. can i get more of them please? especially the one like the 'casual dominance' fic omgg. that one made me feel THINGS. btw!!! congrats on reaching the 1k mark. totally deserved <33

-🥀

Wow babe, that's a lot! I'm really glad you're enjoying them! I know I've written a few since you sent this in, but I decided to treat this as a request for specifically casual dom!marauders because I'm weak for them too :*

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 1.1k words

Your teeth chatter as you step out of the fastest shower of your life, barely drying yourself off before starting on your makeup. You’re so dumb. You’re so, so dumb. Of course it’d be the night before your presentation that you’d accidentally set your alarm for PM instead of AM. How many times had you stirred, thought about getting up, and decided to wait until your alarm went off? It had only been when you’d woken to an empty bed, sunlight coming in through the window, that you’d realized. 

You’re still running on the adrenaline of that waking jolt, now mixed with the extra edginess from your frigid shower since you couldn’t afford to wait for the water to warm. You probably won’t be late, but you’re definitely going to be late by pre-presentation standards. You’d planned to get there a half hour in advance to set up and mentally prepare. Now you’re going to have ten minutes at best, and that’s only if you can get out the door in the next few. You finish with your makeup—your hair’s just going to have to dry on the way—and turn to where you’d hung your pre-selected and Sirius-vetted presentation outfit the night before. The hangers sit empty. 

You go into the bedroom, hoping one of the boys had laid them out on the bed while you’d been in the shower. Nothing. Just your socks and shoes where you’d left them by the bedroom door. 

“Shit,” you mutter to yourself, pulling the socks on because you can do that, at least. “Shit shit shit!” 

You take off down the stairs, relieved to see Sirius on his way up. “Hey! Do you know where—” your foot hits too close to the edge of one step, slipping down to the next. It seems inclined to keep going, but Sirius’ hands catch you around the waist. 

“Shit, baby.” He looks down at your feet as you get them under you again, eyebrows drawn together. “Running down the stairs is already bad enough, but with socks on?” 

“Do you know where my presentation outfit went?” you ask in a rush. 

Sirius blinks. “No. It’s not where you left it?” You shake your head and decide this conversation is no longer a productive use of your time, moving past him. “Don’t run,” he says after you, and you slow to a slight hustle down the remaining steps. 

You practically skid into the kitchen, where Remus is just about to sit down at the table with his cup of coffee and James is running the blender. You raise your voice to be heard over it. “Do either of you know where my presentation outfit went?” 

James stops the blender. “Morning to you too, sweetheart. Everything okay?” 

You feel like you could burst into tears, but that would just waste more time. Why is no one cooperating with your need for efficiency?

“I’m going to be late!” you stress to James, turning around to survey the kitchen, the living room, like they’ll just be hanging in some random corner where you somehow forgot them. “I need my clothes, have you seen them?”

“Dove.” Remus sets his coffee down to take you by the shoulders. “Breathe. You’ve got time.” 

You exhale, trying not to twitch as your skin crawls with urgency, or to lecture him on how little time you actually have. Remus watches you patiently. His hands slide up to either side of your face once you no longer seem like a flight risk, thumb stroking your cheek. 

“Your outfit’s in the dryer,” he says in a soothing voice, still holding you as if to keep you from running off. “I was warming it up while you were in the shower.” 

Your next inhale scrapes on the way in, a grateful pressure building behind your eyes. “Rem, that’s so sweet,” you say. “Thank you.” 

Remus gives you a smile and a little shrug, more casual than the faint pinkness of his cheeks would suggest. He lets his hands skim back down your neck, giving your upper arms a light squeeze. “Why don’t you let it finish running while you have your breakfast, yeah? That way there’s no risk of spilling on it.” 

You shake your head, aware this won’t go over well but too anxious to worry much about it. “I don’t have time for breakfast,” you tell him. “I need to catch the bus in, like—” Your eyes search for a moment before landing on the microwave clock. “—five minutes.” 

“I’ll drive you,” Sirius says, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt as he comes back downstairs.

You glance at the microwave clock again in case you read it wrong the first time. “You can’t,” you say. “You’ll be late.” 

Sirius shrugs. “I don’t have a presentation. They’ll deal with it.” 

You look to Remus, expecting him to object to Sirius’ proposed tardiness, but he only nods, sitting down with his coffee. 

“Are…are you sure?” you ask Sirius, trying to adjust to the sudden non-urgency of your situation. 

“It’s no problem,” he promises you. “Stop looking so upset, honey, just eat your breakfast.” 

“Drink your breakfast, is more like it,” James says proudly, coming in from the kitchen to pass you a glass of whatever he’d been concocting in the blender. It’s a murky brown-green, and you try not to wrinkle your nose for James’ sake. 

“Thanks.” You take it from him tentatively. “It’s…it’s a smoothie?” 

James laughs at your expression, and you think you hear Remus snort into his coffee. “Yes, it’s a smoothie. The color’s because of the chocolate protein powder and the spinach, but it’s got fruit, too, don’t worry.” 

You swirl the glass a bit, assessing the color. “Why so much spinach?”

James sets a hand on your shoulder, encouraging you into your chair as he joins the three of you at the table with a smoothie of his own. “Iron, sweetheart.” He casts a pointed glance at your legs, spotted here and there with purple-and-yellow blotches of skin. “Seems like you need it. You’re bruising like a peach lately.” 

Remus hums in agreement as you take a tentative sip of the smoothie. It’s not bad, though you can feel little bits of spinach sticking to your teeth. You make a mental note to have Sirius check your smile before you get out of the car later.

“And I saw that look in your eyes when you stood up too fast from the couch yesterday,” Remus says, quirking an eyebrow when you look at him in surprise. “You’re not as subtle as you think, dove.” 

You bring the glass to your lips again to avoid making a response. Sirius laughs, and when you smile sheepishly, his grin turns goofy. “Hold it there,” he says, taking your jaw in hand. You keep your smile in place as his eyes narrow. “Front tooth on the left. My left.” You lick at the piece of spinach, and he nods, dropping his hand. 

“Knew I could count on you,” you tell him. “Thanks, Siri.” 

Sirius pecks you on the cheek. “S’what I’m here for, gorgeous.”

[littleheartsong]

Laios x fem or gn reader where she also enjoys monsters but she also enjoys animals (in the mentally ill way). Which leads to them always chatting about them, like chilchuck will be walking by and he'll hear that female hyenas have a penis. He just walks away thinking "what in the fucking fuck was that!?" I imagine they would also stay up late talking about monsters. :D

(↑The big little man learning that information)

i too am mentally ill about animals i could talk about biology for literal hours

laios/gn reader content: fluff. autism-to-autism conversation warnings: casual conversation about killing animals+monsters. mentions of animal genitalia. pretty normal!

"So... what's your favourite monster?"

The sudden question prompted Laios to look up from the delicious aroma of simmering kelpie, probably the one thing to take his attention away from food, while both Chilchuck and Marcille grimaced at what you'd just unleashed.

"My favourite monster?" Laios ponders the question as you nod in confirmation, "Well, Basilisks are pretty cool since they have two heads, though it's thought that the snake head is the actual head." 

"Really?"

"Yeah! Since it's cut in half, the snake head lives longer." His smile widens at your interest.

"I wonder what would happen if you cut a two-headed animal in half. Would one head live longer or would they both die at the same time?" You wonder while tilting your head.

Laios thinks about that for a second; it's a pretty good question! He's only seen two-headed calves in his village, and they didn't live long after birth.

"I think it depends on where it's cut since two-headed animals aren't supposed to have two heads and Basilisks are born that way," he concludes with a nod to cement his statement.

"That makes sense! It probably depends on the animal too; it would be harder for a larger animal like a calf to live longer than something smaller; like a snake," you say.

It appears Marcille has since lost her appetite and absconded from the area to avoid any more of this conversation and tucked into her bedroll, praying to whatever spirits can hear her you will stop soon. Chilchuck is more morbidly fascinated by what you two are talking about. He didn't even know animals could have two heads, and he hopes he never encounters one. Two-headed monsters are enough for him.

"No one can seem t' decide where th' 'ead begins n' ends," Senshi chimes in while preparing dinner.

"So are Basilisks your favourite then?" you ask Laios.

"Huh? Oh!" Laios perks up, reminded of the original question, "They're cool, but not my favourite," He taps his finger to his chin, once again in thought, "I'd have to say Wargs are my favourite," 

You smile at that." Wargs are so cute! They remind me of hyenas or bears, with their big, boxy heads and bulky bodies.

Laios is stunned for a moment; never in his whole life has he heard someone describe Wargs as 'cute'. He'd sooner describe them as 'cool' or 'ferocious'; does that mean you think bears and hyenas are cute too? He could understand bears. They look fluffy, though they also have those big claws. What other things do you think are cute?

"Yeah, they kind of are; they remind me a bit of my dogs back at my village," he says. "They also have really soft fur,"

"Wow! I wanna pet a Warg!" You clap your hands together in delight. "It'd probably bite my hand off, but it'd be worth it."

Warm laughter falls out of Laios' mouth before he can catch it. "Maybe we can find one and pet it together sometime."

Your face breaks into a grin as you sit closer to Laios. "Sounds like a plan! Hey, maybe they're really social, like hyenas."

Laios has to clear his throat, so anything he wants to say doesn't get stuck in there, as a flush rushes to his face. "I don't know that much about hyenas... I've only seen pictures."

That moment is when you really light up. "Oh! They're so cool! Especially spotted hyenas; they're the biggest ones, and they're also called bone-crushing hyenas since can break bones with their bites," and off you go.

"The females are larger than the males, and it's a matriarchal society too! So even the lowest-ranking female is still higher-ranked than the male. Even their penises are bigger!" 

Laios watches you share this information with wide, wondrous eyes. "Wait, their penises?"

"Oh, well, it's not a real penis," you correct yourself. "It's just the clitoris enlarged, but it pretty much acts like a real penis. They mate with it, pee through it, and even give birth with it!"

A pause

"... How does that work?" Laios asks.

"Well-

At that point, Chilchuck silently excuses himself to his own bedroll. He doesn't need to know the details. Birth is excruciating enough as is, but with a- no. No. He shakes his head to get rid of the terrible thought.

Senshi seems interested in listening, though.

[milswrites]

My Beautiful Girls

~ Cassian x SingleMum!Reader

Series masterlist

Summary: An anxious Cassian meets your daughter for the first time.

Warnings: Fluffy goodness

Notes: For the ultimate Cassian girly @sarawritestories

"Hi, I'm Cassian. It's nice to meet you!"

The Illyrian General smiled crookedly as he spoke, clammy hands trembling around the flowers trapped within his steel-like grip.

"Fuck . . . fuck . . . Come on Cas, you can do better than that."

Slowly unfurling his wings, Cassian lightly shook them in the hope of brushing away his steadily growing nerves.

"Breathe Cas, breathe" the male exhaled deeply, rolling back his tense shoulders before locking his determined eyes onto the closed door in front of him, "Hi, I'm Cassian! I've heard so much about you!"

A groan of frustration tore from Cassian's lips, shoulders slumping in dejection as he miserably dropped the flowers to his side.

Cassian had seen his fair share of carnage, having stared death in the face a plethora of times and still lived to tell the tale. Yet no battle, nor life-threatening experience, could have prepared him for the terror he felt in this moment.

The great Lord of Bloodshed riddled with fear at the prospect of meeting your sweet little girl, so only for her not to like him.

It was almost laughable, thinking back to how confident he was when you had first brought up the topic of him meeting your daughter. Cassian recalled flashing you a toothy grin, eyes bright and laugh carefree as he promised you that all children loved him. He was, after all, Nyx's favourite uncle.

Yet now, standing before the door to your home, Cassian wondered if he would ever find the courage to enter. Every possibility as to how this introduction could go wrong festered in the male's worrisome mind, until his poisonous thoughts left his wings twitching with the desire to fly away and hide from his fears.

But Cassian couldn't bring himself to flee, not if it meant losing you.

So here he stood, the icy winter air uncomfortably nipping at his wind-kissed cheeks, rehearsing exactly what it was he would say to your daughter when he first met her. Seeking to gain back some control in the face of his uncertain future.

Adamant that he would not be the one to ruin the one good thing in his life, Cassian drew in a long shaky breath before trying again, "Hi sweetheart, I'm so glad I get to finally meet you."

"Right back at you gorgeous"

If the sight of the Illyrian General practicing a mental script to recite to your five year old daughter didn't bring you to the brink of laughter, seeing the way he startled at your sudden appearance did.

Cassian stumbling backwards as you pulled open your door to great him, cheeks flushing a deep rouge as though you had just caught him in a compromising position.

It was only once your laughter had subsided, and the low grumblings of embarrassment from the male's lips had ceased, were you then able to greet him. Your warm lips coming to meet his own frozen ones in a soft kiss, the action working to further deepen Cassian's flustered blush.

An impatient shout from inside pulled you from your kiss, a light chuckle leaving both of your lips as you quickly glance inside to where your daughter was waiting, "She's been talking about this all day you know? I've never brought anyone home to meet her before, she's really excited."

Your gaze falls to Cassian who was drawing in deep breaths in an attempt to calm himself. Concern pooling in your eyes as you watched how his lips were stretched into an anxious smile which failed to meet his eyes.

"Hey, there's nothing to worry about," you reassured your partner, moving a soothing hand to rest against his cheek, "she'll love you just as much as I do."

Appreciation swam in Cassian's eyes, a soundless thank you falling from his lips before he raised a bouquet for you to take. Or rather two bouquets.

"For you and Evelyn" he nervously mumbled, awkwardly shuffling his feet as he waited for you to take the flowers, "I wanted to get her something nice but . . . I'm not actually sure what five year old's like."

"They're beautiful Cas" you spoke, tears of joy lined your eyes at the male's generosity as you placed a gentle kiss onto his cheek in thanks.

"Are you ready?" you asked whilst stepping aside, making space for Cassian to squeeze himself through your doorway, the male having to curl his wings in tightly in order to fit through the smaller entrance.

"Come on, bat boy. It's time for you to meet your new best friend."

Placing the flowers down onto a nearby console, you led Cassian through your home, softly calling out to Evelyn as you approached the room she was playing in, "Evie, there's someone here to see you."

The sound of tiny feet padding across the floor followed your words, Cassian curiously moving his gaze to the entrance of the room as he waited for your daughter to emerge.

Only his eyes didn't quite catch her face as the small girl barrelled right into the skirt of your dress, shyly hiding within the flowing material of your skirt. "Come on Eves" you encouraged warmly, a tender hand coming to rest against her back, "Aren't you going to say hello?"

A little head tentatively peered over the fabric of your dress, Evelyn's eyes widening as she took in Cassian's wings which imposingly filled the space of your corridor. The nervous girl squeaked a small hello in the General's direction before moving to hide behind the safety of your body once more.

Worried that his wings were too intimidating, Cassian drew them in tightly, bending his knees in order to lower himself to Evelyn's level before greeting the shy girl, "Hi Evie, I'm Cassian." The male allowed a bright smile to cross his face as he watched your daughter's curious eyes peer over the skirt of your dress at his introduction, "Your mum has told me everything about you."

Wanting to aid Cassian who was growing increasingly panicked at the prospect of having to break the ice with your timid daughter, you bent down to speak to her, "How about we go into the room so you can show Cassian your toys hmm?" With a sheepish nod, Evelyn takes your hand, hesitantly moving out from behind your skirt in order to lead you into the living room.

Cassian followed suit, standing from his crouch before moving to the door, only to be unpleasantly surprised upon discovering he was unable to fit through the small wooden frame. His large wings blocking him from entering the room.

Curling them in tighter, the male tried again, attempting to walk into the room once more only to be stopped by the thud of his wings against either side of the doorframe. Just as a frustrated curse was about to tumble from Cassian's lips, a melodic laugh pulled him from his anger.

And Cassian could have sworn it was the sweetest sound he had ever heard.

There stood Evelyn, in the middle of your living room, clutching her stomach as she laughed to her hearts content at Cassian's unfortunate situation.

It was impossible for him to be angry, Cassian's brows unfurrowing at the beautiful sound of her laughter, a deep chuckle of his own breaking from his mouth as he watched the young girl giggle. Love already growing in his eyes as Cassian wished to bottle the sound of her joy.

"Evie," you started in-between your cackling, "Why don't you help poor Cas get in?"

It took all his effort for Cassian not to melt when Evelyn padded over to him, cheeks still rosy from her laughter, and held out a tiny hand for him to take.

Making sure to move his wings into a position that would enable him to enter the room, Cassian took Evelyn's hand which was dwarfed by his own, allowing the girl to pull him into the room.

"My hero" Cassian sweetly grinned, crouching down to place a delicate kiss onto the back of your daughter's hand, "Either I'm going to need some smaller wings or your mum's going to have to get a bigger door."

Another round of giggles fell from Evelyn's lips at his words, her little hand still tucked into Cassian's palm, the girl shaking her head as she quietly spoke, "I like your wings just the way they are."

"Thank you" Cassian replied with a smile, cheeks dusting with a pink blush at her sweet compliment. "I like your dress" he replied, coming to lightly poke Evelyn's button nose which earned him an excitable squeal from the girl before her face adorably scrunched into a picture of curiosity.

"Can . . . can I touch them?" Evelyn shyly asked. Her question being met with sounds of protest from you, knowing just how sensitive Illyrian wings can be. Yet Cassian's answer surprised you, the male telling the girl yes without even an ounce of hesitation.

"Here" he softly spoke, taking Evelyn's hand which was still wrapped in his own and moving it towards a spot on his wing he knew wasn't as sensitive as the others.

Not wanting Cassian to feel obliged to do this just to keep your daughter happy you protested once more, "Cas you don't have to-"

"I don't mind sweetheart"

And as Evelyn's hand came to lightly press against the membrane of his wing, Cassian couldn't stop the spark of joy he felt at seeing the young girl smile. Knowing in his heart that despite this being their first introduction, the General would do anything and everything within his power to ensure your daughter's happiness.

It took everything in you not to cry at the sight of Cassian sating your daughter's curiosity. At the dazzling smile which was painted across his face as he looked at Evelyn with such love. A type of love you had only hoped she would one day get to experience, the love that only a father could provide.

“Can I mama? Can I please?” Evelyn’s begging voice broke you from your thoughts.

“Can you what sorry sweetheart?” You ask, wondering exactly what it was that left your daughter so eager for an answer.

“Can we go flying? Please, please, pleaseeee.”

Cassian grinned at you wickedly from behind where Evelyn was stood, shrugging his shoulders as he mimicked your daughter’s pleading tone, “Please mama, we promise we’ll be good!”

As you flatly stared between Cassian’s smirking face and Evelyn’s equally mischievous smile you silently cursed yourself, scoffing in disbelief at the fact Cassian had known your daughter for under an hour and had already pulled her into his troublesome ways.

Praying to the mother for the strength you are going to need for the restless days ahead.

It had been an evening to remember for Evelyn, Cassian having been more than willing to occupy her until the late hours of the night. Bed-time forgotten as the two of them played and played until Evelyn was no longer able to keep her eyes open no matter how hard she tried.

Your daughter sprawled across yours and Cassian’s lap as the three of you cuddled on the sofa. It didn’t take much longer for you to follow suit and join Evelyn in her dreaming, eyes drifting closed as Cassian’s warmth pulled you into an inviting slumber.

Cassian was more than content to sit and watch the two of you sleep, lip curling at the soft snores which escaped from Evelyn’s mouth.

And as Cassian lay there with the two of you safely tucked within the sanctuary of his arms, he wondered if this was what he had been missing all of his life. For being here, surrounded by the small family you had built for yourself, Cassian could have sworn that his heart had grown two sizes bigger.

So as he stayed awake, scared of missing out on a single moment, Cassian whispered into the silence of the night. A hushed prayer for whoever was listening.

“Thank you” a soft smile graced his lips, “For bringing me my beautiful girls.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Notes: Ahhhh I love them so much 🥹

If you want to see any more of them and have an ideas for what it is you want please do feel free to send in some requests because I totally wouldn’t mind writing more about this little family 🥹

[beenbaanbuun]

mothers w/ mingi

words - kind of short

genres - fluff

warnings - shaving, bad relationships with family, bad relationships with food, body issues, inherited insecurity, mingi is a precarious baby

——————————————————————————

“do you think your ball trimmer will shave legs?” you turn and look at mingi who’s lay innocently on his bed, scrolling mindlessly through his phone. that is until your words sink in and his gaze shoots up to where you stand with the small contraption in hand.

“i guess so,” he shrugs as he turns his phone off and puts it straight down. you ignore the way his eyes furrow as you turn it on and inspect the blades close up. you don’t know how close the shave would be, but you guess in desperate times, that doesn’t really matter. at this point, any shave will do.

you switch it off again and nod to yourself, placing it on the dresser before going through your drawers to grab your other things ready for a shower. you pick up a plain blue pair of cotton panties that despite not being sexy at all, you’re sure mingi will find an excuse to rip off of you post shower. then you grab your comfiest sports bra that again has one too many holes to be considered sexy. finally you grab one of mingi’s shirts - an oversized one that seems to have taken permanent residence in your pyjama drawer - and begin to head to the bathroom with your boyfriend’s ball trimmer in hand too.

“hang on a second, baby,” he calls out after you, scrambling off the bed and rushing towards you until you’re close enough for him to swaddle in his grasp. arms wrap around your shoulders, pinning you to his chest, “what do you think you’re doing?”

you lean back against him, enjoying the impromptu hug more than you’d care to admit.

“shaving my legs,” you close your eyes as you inhale the familiar peppery smell of his cologne; it’s warm and invades your senses, just like him, “i lost my razor so i need to use this.”

“why are you shaving your legs?” he asks, not quite satisfied with your reply. probably because you’d stopped bothering with that sort of thing pretty soon into the relationship. it’s a lot of effort, and your hair seems to be the last thing on mingi’s mind when he saw your legs. mostly he just thinks about what’s between them and how he’s going to get to it. he hardly even pays notice to the prickly hairs that run up and down your skin.

“we’re going on holiday with my mother,” you grumble in reply, “i have to be prepared.”

ah yes; the monster-in-law…

she’s a lovely lady for the most part, inviting mingi into the family with open arms despite the fact that she obviously wasn’t expecting him when you said you were bringing a boyfriend home. its clear she doesn’t approve of the way he dresses, or the nail varnish that coats his fingertips, but that doesn’t stop her from treating him like her own son. he gets the biggest portions of her home cooked meals and the first pick of desert. she calls him handsome when she sees him wearing something she likes, and compliments his uniqueness whenever he’s wearing something that’s a little more outlandish for her old-fashioned taste. she thinks he’s brave when he colours his hair in an outlandish fashion, and gorgeous when he wears it black. all in all, she’s a pretty lovely woman once you get past the hard shell of her traditional values.

and, of course, if you ignore the way she treats you.

to be honest, mingi is impressed at how resilient you turned out after living with that woman for 18 years. constantly having your self esteem torn down can’t be good for someone’s mental health, and yet you made it out the other side with a relatively normal relationship with your body. you have a healthy relationship with food, if you don’t count the days when mingi has to coax you to eat just a little more, and the days where he’d find you scrutinising yourself in front of a mirror are, for the most part, long gone! sometimes you tell him it’s because of him you feel so comfortable in your body; he refuses to take any of the credit for your own inability to be broken.

in fact, it’s only moments like this that he begins to see cracks in those walls you’ve built up. moments when you know you’ll have to see your mum soon. it’s like alarm bells go off in your mind reminding you that you haven’t quite met her standards yet. eat less because ‘you’ve gained a bit weight recently; you ought to keep an eye on that’. shave your legs because ‘as a woman you shouldn’t have hair on your legs; it’s just not natural’. buy expensive skincare products because ‘acne? at your age? you really should take better care of yourself’. it’s these moments that mingi can see the damage done. that he really has to take care of you.

“you shouldn’t listen to your mum,” he presses a kiss to the top of your head and gives you an extra tight squeeze with his gangly arms, “they’re your legs, not hers; you only ever have to do what you want to with your body.”

“i know,” you say, leaning your back into his sturdy chest. he’s so warm and cosy, so reliable and strong. the small smile that rises to your face as he holds you close is involuntary. you guess you’re just so in love that you can help it, “she’s just so hard to be around when i’m not absolutely perfect.”

“well then i don’t see the issue here,” he lets you go for just a few seconds, spinning you around until you’re facing him. once more he encloses you in his grasp, a loose grip around your waist just to keep you close, “you’re already perfect, baby.”

“you’re so cheesy,” you giggle. he laughs too. in that moment nothing matters to you but him.

“it’s not cheesy if it’s the truth,” he bends down and presses a firm kiss to your lips, “perfect, perfect, perfect baby.”

[alessiamalfoyzabini]

𝐇𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐲 𝐄𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 | 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐎𝐧𝐞

Pairing | Yandere Jungkook x Reader

Word Count | 2,382

Warnings | +18, bullying, for the moment only this

This does not reflect my way of thinking or living at all, it is just a work of fiction, it is like watching a horror movie, many of us love horror movies, but we would never dream of what we see in those movies happening in reality as well.

Simply put, this story was written for entertainment purposes, it should not be seen as a reflection of my values, opinions or morals. I absolutely do not condone such acts.

⤷ Summary | If she had paid attention earlier to the sin that dwelt behind those obsidian irises, she would never have trusted it.

If she had noticed earlier the devouring love that dwelled in his corrupt heart, she probably would have fled.

She had done none of that, and now she had to come to terms with her new reality.

➢ Author's Note | This work originated in Italian, so i apologize for any errors you will find, i am not a native english speaker, so go ahead and write in the comments where and what i can improve! 🥺❤

Chapter List - I - II - III - IV - V - VI - VII - VIII / The End

There was something in the air that day, something that weighed down her chest and left a bitter aftertaste in her mouth.

She looked outside her room and saw large gray clouds looming ominously, it was probably an approaching storm, and even so, she would still have to go to school, she could not escape her school obligations.

She had done so much to escape the harsh judgment of her family members, she knew that attending college was a huge expense for her parents, especially for being an out-of-towner with so much rent and bills to pay, so the only thing she could do to repay them was to get good grades and come out with a more than excellent GPA, without mentioning her problems.

So the girl prepared herself for yet another stressful and gloomy day, surrounded by prof's coaches and daddy's boys who wouldn't stop bragging about their possessions for a moment.

She adjusted her jacket and grabbed the bag containing all the necessary books, grabbed the house keys on the fly and locked the door behind her, not before nodding in the direction of the elderly neighbor who came out with her adorable little wagging dog every morning at that hour.The little Maltese barked in her direction and with a smile walked over to the couple, stroking the soft coat of the dog who, excited, hoisted himself up on two paws, accompanying her caresses with his head. Y/N burst out laughing at that warm expression of appreciation, could it be that only a dog was able to accept it without judgment?

"Do you go to school, Y/N?" asked the lady with a smile.

The girl nodded, "That's right, Mrs. Choi...I have a test today, I hope everything goes well."

"Oh, take it easy, my dear. I really feel that something new will happen for you today," the elderly woman's smile widened and Y/N was interjected.

She was no stranger to the strange outings of the woman, who very often seemed absent-minded and pensive, but a strange chill caught her. She tried to dilute the air with a giggle, "I hope it's also something good," she joked lightly, the woman rippled her lips.

"It depends on your point of view," she shrugged.

Y/N's smile faded away, not wanting to inquire further she decided it was getting quite late and waved a little awkwardly to her wacky neighbor, giving one last caress to the little dog, who continued to bark in her direction, trying to call her back.

"Come on, Y/N...you can get through this day too without too many hiccups," she said to herself, trying to mentally build up her courage. She arrived at the university with a lump in her throat, aware that once she entered the classroom she would see the haughty faces of her classmates again.

She was an outcast and the only classmate with whom she had come to form a decent bond of friendship had to change her address because that faculty was not suitable for her. But to say that she had simply grown tired of being bullied was perhaps easier.

She took a deep breath and entered the classroom, as she presaged, smiles filled with mockery accompanied her all the way to her seat, she took out the appropriate book for that hour of class and ignored everyone, no one however lent her a further glance, the arrival of the teacher had nipped in the bud any attempt at mockery.

Taking a test at the first hour was never easy for anyone, but the girl more than gladly accepted that chance to escape her foolish classmates.

She carried out the task in complete silence, interrupted only briefly by a few balls of paper and notes, some asking her to have her copied, others admonishing her not to sully their own air with her presence. Y/N swallowed, such doggedness seen from an outside eye might have seemed surreal, but to her it was normalcy.

They bothered her just for the sake of it, because she was the one without money, she was the unfashionable girl, she lived in a miserable apartment in a miserable neighborhood, she was everything they were not.

"Psst... Psst, little one!"

Y/N initially ignored that low whisper, but at yet another ball thrown at her head, she turned away in annoyance.

This was Kang Yoozu, one of the boys who worked hardest to make her school life a living hell; he seemed to take pleasure in constant torture and Y/N was often one of his favorite victims.

"What the hell do you want?!" she growled, impatient. He shrugged, "I just wanted to ask you if you were free later."

Y/N frowned, what was that jerk saying?

"Why would you care, Yoozu?" she asked, strangled.

A wicked smile spread across the classmate's face, "Your parents are street food vendors, right? How much can they possibly make per month?"

Y/N found herself gritting her teeth, ignoring the amused exclamations of the others; the professor seemed to have disappeared into thin air, which frustrated the girl even more.

"I don't know what you're getting at, but I suggest you shut your mouth," she said harshly and Yoozu's eyes narrowed.

"I'm just wondering how they were keep you, don't you think it's incumbent on them to lighten their load and earn money in other ways?"

The young woman blanched at the outrageous statement-what the fuck was she implying?! "And let's hear it-what would those ways be?" she rose from her chair under everyone's gaze.

Yoozu looked around with feigned interest, then elbowed his seatmate, chuckling.

"Well, I have a lot of money, a fuck or two wouldn't hurt, don't you think? You would earn honestly on your own strength," the whole class erupted in convulsive laughter, Y/N felt humiliated. She had endured much from them, had swallowed a myriad of bitter morsels, but no, that one would not let her get away with it.

In a very brief instant she found herself facing the smug boy who stared at her with satisfaction, and soon the scarlet shape of five perfectly outlined fingers was stamped on the candid face of that being, a being who for two years had made it unbearable for her to study for a better future. The noise was a dull pop and everyone fell silent.

Yoozu's eyes turned icy, and soon he jerked up from his chair, flipping it behind him.

"You dared too much, beggar" he made to approach threateningly, no one would intervene, she knew, but fortunately the professor's voice stopped whatever was about to happen.

"What the heck is going on in this class? Y/N! Yoozu! Go back to your seats immediately before I suspend your test."

The man's threatening voice made the boy take a step back, Y/N went back to her seat, but she felt the threatening gaze of her companion behind her the rest of the time, until the end of the hour sounded and everyone got up to leave their verifications on the professor's desk, who collected all the papers and added something to the register, which Y/N guessed was about her and Yoozu. A sick feeling invaded her stomach, she did not want her average to drop because of a bastard like Kang Yoozu, he had practically invited her to prostitute herself. With him.

Disgusted she took the art sketchbook from her bag, a small smile was born on her lips.

Classes with Professor Jeon always gave her a chance to get through the day in a slightly more uplifted mood.

He was a young boy ready to put himself on the front lines to help his students, older than her by five years, he had found a place in the university where he had studied because all the school staff thought he was deserving of getting a professorship there. And, Y/N admitted at least to herself, he was handsome as well as kind and helpful. She felt her heartbeat increase when her favorite professor made his entrance into the classroom, greeting all his pupils with a bright smile, exchanged a few words with the older professor who gave way to him, and during that conversation the girl clearly heard the excited murmurs of her classmates. They did not think much about it, giving vent to their shamelessly enamored sighs.

Y/N merely shrugged her shoulders as the young professor took a seat behind the desk and gave everyone a jovial look.

"Good morning, guys" he said quietly, a chorus of "good morning" and "hello" rose from the desks.

Y/N watched spellbound as the corner of his lips slightly lifted in a satisfied smile of the man, her professor's long hair that day was tied in a ponytail that the girl found damn adorable, which contrasted with the tattoos that decorated the entire arm left uncovered by the pulled-up shirt sleeve, the man crossed his arms and his biceps swelled in a hypnotic movement that caught the girl unprepared, she felt her body set on fire and with shame removed her gaze.

What she did not know was that Jungkook was also watching her. He never let her out of his sight, in truth.

From the first time he had caught her rushing into the classroom, wet as a tender chick, Jungkook could not help but feel a strange flutter every time he laid eyes on his pupil. Their eyes had met for the first time that day, a rush had gone through him from side to side, thunderstruck by that little figure who had bowed in apology over and over again.

And it was wrong, he should never have taken an interest in one of his students like that, but he was a man, a man with secret feelings and appetites, and everything about Y/N screamed timidity and fragility.

He wanted to protect her, wanted to take her away, wanted to make her his.

He knew about the way her classmates treated her, his colleagues sometimes talked about it during lunch breaks, this was terrible for him, it hurt him to even imagine the way the girl felt, he would have protected her if it was possible, but each time the bullying happened in his absence, and as a professor he could do nothing if Y/N herself did not ask for help. He could not punish the perpetrators without catching them in the act. The young man sighed, before lowering his eyes to the register, frowning at what he found written there.

"Park Y/N and Kang Yoozu were found standing during testing time, they looked like they were about to start a fight, I intervened in time to put them in their place."

Jungkook gritted his teeth as he read his student's name next to Y/N's.

The girl was too quiet a person to provoke a quarrel, his dark irises stopped on Yoozu, who was giggling along with his partner as his scribbled something in sketchbook.

Y/N, on the other hand, waited quietly and composedly for her class to begin, and that told Jungkook a lot about the dynamics of the strange event described by his colleague.

He rose from his chair clearing his throat, all eyes were soon on him.

He sensed the mischievous glances of the girls in his direction, he knew he was very much desired, after all he was the only young professor in the institution, but he did not let those attentions buy him, the only gaze he wanted on himself was that of the same girl who was anxiously crushing her fingers.

He leaned back against the desk, crossing his arms again, and in Y/N's gaze he read something very much like... desire? He looked at her, biting his lips for a thousandth of a second, clenching the tender flesh between his teeth, but that minimal amount of time was enough for the girl to widen her eyes and lower them immediately afterward, her cheeks flushed. Jungkook felt himself tightening in his pants, thinking that he was so adorable that he wanted to fuck her right then, in front of everyone.

He would have gladly made her cry as his cock penetrated her deeply.

"Guys, today I'm not going to talk to you about history and artists," he began, his voice crystal clear and smooth, "But about a subject that, unfortunately, will never stop being talked about," he paused behind Yoozu's desk.

He observed the lines drawn by the boy on the once-clean page, Yoozu made to cover his scrawl, but Jungkook was quick to catch him, "Let me see a bit, Kang," he said, before taking a better look at that jumble of shapeless lines, which took on the appearance of a naked girl with a tear-streaked face, there was a uniform at the corner of the paper and a bag, which Jungkook immediately recognized, raised an eyebrow in the boy's direction and returned the object to him, not without first tearing up the page, "Drawing your companions without clothes is not what I asked you to do, Yoozu.

Employ my hour to draw something in good taste, instead of indulging in such disgusting antics," the man scolded him harshly. The student bowed his head, humiliated, apologetically, and his deskmate turned away, as if to put some distance between himself and his friend, which the teacher laughed at internally. It was precisely people like Yoozu who had no friends.

Jungkook finally turned around and walked in Y/N's direction, stopped just behind her and lowered himself until he reached her ear, "Today's lesson is about bullying," he murmured, the girl felt her legs trembling under his low and sweet tone, she meekly nodded, writing on a vacant page the theme, then Jungkook raised his voice slightly, "I would like you all to draw a representation of bullying, also writing a small dedication to the kids who experience it firsthand."

When the young teacher turned away from her, Y/N resumed breathing normally.

Everyone caught the stinging reference, the girl gazed admiringly at Jungkook's strong shoulders, perfectly aligned in a proud posture that Y/N had no trouble finding attractive, clutched the pencil grip and set to work, unaware of the forbidden desire she aroused moment by moment in her teacher.

[animeyanderelover]

I am back once again in my Twilight mood and thought that I would write some poly!relationship with my 2 favorite vampires from the Cullens.

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, manipulation, gaslighting, threats, stalking, overprotective behavior, isolation, death

Sharing a darling

Alice has definitely caught glimpses of you already in her vision. She knows that Jasper and her have another soulmate somewhere in the world but it is only when your parents decide to move to Forks that she is able to see the bigger picture of everything. She is certainly surprised to find out that that she and Jasper have another soulmate but she doesn't ponder too much about it. Instead she just feels very happy to know that you exist. Edward probably finds out before Jasper but only because he read Alice's mind. He also gives her an astonished look but soon cracks out a small smile as he knows that Alice feels happy about it. She tells Jasper as soon as she has had her vision and it is Jasper who is a tad bit more hesitant to fully grasp the situation. He has been with Alice for such a long time and he loves her so much so he has a hard time fathoming how he could possibly love someone the same way he adores her. He senses her happiness though about the situation so he silently accepts the future.

There is time to prepare for your arrival and it is time that passes by far too slowly for Alice. She's definitely giddy whilst thinking about your arrival and her joyous mood eventually also gets through Jasper who starts looking forward to seeing you, even if he is still a tad bit cautious about all of this. Alice loves telling him what she has seen in her vision and even draws you so that Jasper can see just how cute you are. Alice makes sure that Jasper and her dress up especially well as soon as she knows when exactly you will arrive and where exactly both of them will meet you. She's so eager as she drags Jasper with her on that day and whilst Jasper isn't exactly feeling as optimistic as she is, he doesn't have the heart to deny her what she wants. Both of them don't have to look long for you as their enhanced senses aid them in spotting you quickly and in that moment they really feel like you have been missing all along.

If Alice would still have a heart, it would pound so wildly against her chest right now as she just looks at you and takes in your every curve and feature. She's already mentally gushing over you and can't wait to do everything with you she has already been planning in the months before you moved to Forks. Jasper's doubts completely fade away as soon as he spots you too as he instantly feels the connection. His eyes also observe you with a warm glint in your eyes but differently from Alice, he is also being much more strategic and especially more overprotective. Suddenly he becomes even more aware of his surroundings and if anyone is looking funnily at you as his mind instantly switches to a protective mode, especially since you are a human. Alice notices his more rigid and alerted gaze and nudges him playfully. He can worry later. Both of them should now meet their soulmate.

Jasper takes the backseat for quite a while as he just lets Alice do the job. Not only because he knows that Alice is far more easily approachable than he is since he has a colder appearance but also because he is worried that he might be tempted by your blood. You have a very sweet smell around you and he has still very vividly in mind what happened when Bella cut herself on paper during her birthday. He could never imagine hurting you, his soulmate, yet he knows that it might be more realistic than he might want to admit. It almost feels like he is a thrid wheel for a while and even if Alice tries to include him more since she just knows that he's silently suffering from not being as involved and as close with you as she is already, she respects his wishes. Your joyful appearance in their lives actually motivates him to work harder on his self-control since he would never be able to forgive himself if he would hurt you due to his own lack of self-control.

Alice is a refreshing breeze that just enters your life as she approaches you with confidence and from that day on is always involved. You might be a bit startled by her bold approach but she is surprisingly good in sensing how far she can go from now. She takes the pleasure of being your guide you can run to in search for help since you are new here. Her goal is to be the first person you are really close to because she knows that if she is someone you already know better than others, you will gravitate more to her and rather search for her than ask new people for help. Especially if you are on a more introverted side. In either case, Alice seemingly adjusts flawlessly to your own vibe which allows you to feel more comfortable when around her. Jasper due to his more quiet nature initially spooks you out a bit but she reassures you that her lover is deep down just a big softie. You'll see that soon enough.

If Alice is the one who is visibly present in your life and always makes sure to tell you about the newest fashion, rumors and stories in this small town, Jasper is the one who is always watching over you behind the scenes. He is definitely too protective over you for his own good and that is made all the more worse since you are still only a human. He's the one who is always a few steps behind Alice and you when she excitedly shows you a great shop for clothes or a nice place to consume some beverages and some cakes, even if she sadly can't share the joy of eating and drinking as you do which is why she tries to avoid dragging you to such places. His eyes always seem to scam your surroundings and the people passing by as if he is always prepared to hear something or see something that will indicate that your life is in danger. He is the one who at times even stalks you just to quench that overprotective duty that he feels now that you are part of Alice's and his life.

Edward and Alice, and by extension also the rest of the Cullens, is aware of the tiny bit more illegal activities that Jasper is doing and they definitely have a small talk with him about it. Edward probably can't lecture him too greatly about it as Jasper is quick to remind his adoptive brother of the way he behaved around Bella when she was still a human. He's definitely getting more defensive and even mildly aggressive if someone wants to have a discussion with him about his stalkerish and overprotective tendencies. A tiny part of him might be able to rationalise why they tell him that he is overdoing it but the major part of him just can't think of what he is doing as wrong. He only has your good intentions in mind after all so he is definitely the type of delusional man who will justify some of his more questionable behavior with his feelings and your safety in mind. Alice is the only one who can talk to him without him instantly getting defensive and for her sake he does try to tone his behavior down a bit. Next to his struggles to control himself around human blood though, he seems to have unlocked a new urge he can't quite control.

Jasper only really allows himself to interact more with you when he has more confidence in his skills to control his lust for blood and only then will you finally get to know him so much better. He has always held himself back before out of fear that the scent of your blood might tempt him and you have always interpreted that as him not liking you. Now he proves you wrong though and actually turns out to be much more mellow than his exterior might let on. You are surprised to actually find out just how sensible he seems to be as he always seems to guess your current mood accurately. Whilst Alice seems to be more outgoing and bubbly, Jasper is more introverted and shockingly soft and mellow around you. He always seems so careful around you and sometimes you feel like he is talking to you like one would talk to a baby deer in order to not scare it away. At the same time you also realise that he doesn't seem to be comfortable around other people. He always appears to be slightly more tense and you always notice the protective step he seems to take as soon as someone he doesn't know approaches you.

Honestly though, the combination of their abilities is kind of scary. You essentially have someone who is able to feel and influence your emotions in Jasper and someone who can see the different outcomes of your future in Alice and whilst both of these abilities would be already quite scary by themselves, combined this makes for an even more dangerous mix. You aren't able to hide stuff from both of them because whilst their enhanced senses would probably already allow them to notice that something is wrong, Jasper can additionally sense it in your feelings. Honestly, Jasper can be a bit overbearing due to this strong need he feels to keep you safe and to protect you so as soon as he senses that you are scared, he automatically enters this overprotective mode where he is ready to scare anyone and everything away that frightens you. Additionally he just feels better if he knows where you are and with whom you are at the moment if neither Alice nor him are with you and not knowing your current location always has him worried.

Alice with her ability to see different scenarios of the future also are in the longer run very scary and useful. Whilst it of course allows both of them to prepare and keep you away from potential danger, it also completely enables her to watch over decisions you make and which impact they might have on your future. If she ever has a vision that would show her that you would have to leave Jasper and her, whether this decision was made by yourself or is the result of someone else, she and Jasper always come up with plans to cancel your departure from them. Neither one of them can just allow you to leave them like this, not now when you have become an official part of their lives and hearts. So whilst Alice always has a watch over your future, Jasper can influence your presence directly by controlling your emotions a bit. Neither one of those would ever dare to take it as far as inducing you with false feelings for both of them but at times Jasper just influences your feelings enough to not have you take any rash decisions.

Alice and Jasper have to compromise on how they spend their time with you. Whilst Alice enjoys going shopping with you and dressing you up all cutely, Jasper just prefers to just have the three of you doing something by yourselves. He always feels uncomfortable and pressured when he is around people he doesn't consider his loved ones and that has become a tad bit worse since you have come around. He wants to show you his love and that isn't as possible when he is constantly alerted due to everyone around you. He is already at times a bit more protective around Alice but that is much worse with you who is only a human. He's much more loving and at ease when it is just the three of you. Alice often plans everything though and Jasper lets her. She is creative with her plans and always comes up with something that will be fun and exciting but that doesn't mean that she doesn't consider Jasper's more simple desires to just hang out with only the three of you.

Both of them start planning relatively early on how to tell you about what they truly are. In fact both of them have been considering this as soon as they knew that you exist. Whilst Alice could have done fine without instantly going over how to tell you that they are vampires as carefully as possible, it was probably Jasper who wanted to start thinking about it at such an early stage already. Of course both of them were only able to really start properly planning as soon as both of you started knowing you better. Jasper has always seen him as the biggest risk to spoil the secret so he has been up until now tried his hardest to not slip up with anything. The closer you get to both of them and also by extension the rest of the Cullens, the bigger the chances are that you start finding out. Edward tells both of them after a visit where he also met you that you are already suspicious. Their eye colour, their cold skin and the fact that you have never seen them eating or drinking anything has already roused your suspicion.

Both of them already suspected as much as Edward tells them but hearing it just confirms their suspicions. Both of them know that they should tell you their secret now sooner than later. Alice tries to be more optimistic about everything whilst Jasper is more worried because he fears that you might see Alice and him as monsters after finding out that both of them are vampires. This is probably one of the prime examples of how Jasper uses his abilities though. He makes sure that he influences your emotions and calms you down when the time comes where Alice and him inform you about their true identities so that you don't freak out and allow Alice to calmly explain everything to you. This might be the moment though you silently realise that you probably have little chances to escape as soon as you finally know the truth but weirdly enough don't feel scared or freaked out. Well, thank Jasper for inducing you with such calm and serene feelings to keep you from feeling scared.

[sillylittlestoryblog]

(Not) Hard to Love

( Part 1 of 2 )

Trafalgar Law x Reader

Warning: ⚠️ reader has self love issues, angst, some suggestive thoughts, not a native English speaker here :)

Authors notes: I have read your comments about writing a part 3 to Keeping me warm, i hadn’t really planed it as a series, so if you have a suggestion how the story should end, I would love to hear your thoughts.

I know this story isn’t that much different. But I am just living for that angsty pining shit. 😗✌🏻this will have a part two and it will follow soon. Anyways have fun. Feel free to comment your thoughts. And remember nice words are good for everybody’s mental health. ;)

"You're staring again"

Robin's words snapped you out of your thoughts. The dark-haired girl was sitting next to you on a sun lounger. There was an open book on her lap. She giggled.

" what?! No. I'm not!"

"Are you sure? You seem to be quite fascinated by him"

She held her sunglasses up for a moment so that you could see her eyes. She winked before putting the sunglasses back on her nose. She grinned and looked happily towards the sun.

It was a hot midday on the Thousand Sunny. Chopper and Luffy were playing a mixture of catch and hide-and-seek, with Luffy usually winning.

Zoro was snoring on deck, his swords always beside his sleeping body.

Usopp and Franky repaired small things on the Sunny and Sanji prepared a few refreshing drinks. While Brook was singing to himself somewhere.

Nami, Robin and you were sunbathing on the main deck. At least that was Nami's plan. Robin had gone along to do some reading. And you had mainly agreed to it for a very specific reason.

Normally your friends would have been reason enough, but the drastic heat was anything but pleasant.

If it hadn't been for this one reason, you would have gone somewhere in the shade long ago, preferably to Sanji in the kitchen or to the girls' room. Somewhere where you could best escape the sun.

But your reason for staying out on deck hadn't really moved for two hours. He was sitting at a small table with a parasol, a few sheets of paper and books spread out in front of him. Immersed in his work.

He was sitting far enough away not to be disturbed by Chopper and Luffy's games.

Trafalgar Law had been on board the Sunny for a few weeks now. Being part of the Strawhat crew again, even if only for a short time, was really getting to him. Groaning, he stretched his body, which was already a little sore from the uncomfortable posture. He really should take breaks from studying more often.

He walked briskly towards the kitchen. As a good doctor, he knew how important it was to drink water regularly, especially in these temperatures.

" and do you like what you see?"

" huh?!"

Once again, your mind wandered. For a brief moment, you wish you could take photos with your eyes. Just save certain moments in your mind forever. And return again and again to study them in detail.

That's all it was. You wanted to know what his deal was. Although you had already had several conversations with him, and in your opinion always with friendly intentions, he had managed to make you feel terrible every time.

Almost every conversation had degenerated too quickly. You could hardly believe how stubborn someone could be. And your captain was Luffy.

So you definitely knew your way around stubborn men. But Law was different. He was cold and grim and always wanted to be right.

You were annoyed by him from day one. Annoyed because this handsome, strong pirate was making you feel things. And that completely destroyed your former inner harmony.

There were either constant arguments or harsh silence between you. Sometimes he ignored you for days. At first you didn’t understand why he stayed with your crew, if he hated it so much.

But every now and then you could see a different side to him. How he talked caringly to Chopper about medication, how he complimented Sanji's cooking, how he gave Robin a brief smile after she had shown him her newest book collection in the library.

But these little moments were never with you. Every interaction between you and him was a disaster. He was grumpy, stressed and strict. So most times he just gave you a weird glance or turned the other way when he saw you walking towards him.

At least you had tried. But ever since Law decided to treat you differently from the other crew members and set out to make your life a living hell, you didn't want to be the friendly one either. You were sure, he didn’t have a problem with the rest of the crew. His problem was you.

But the heat was getting to everyone, and with such temperatures you can shortly forget the real problems.

Especially after Law had gotten rid of his long coat and overly thick sweater. Even his hat, which he usually wears, had been laying on the table next to his medicine and history books for almost half an hour.

And law without all that, was definitely interesting enough to briefly forget what the real problem was.

Tattoos on his upper and lower arms, his dark hair crushed and disheveled from wearing his hat. And his warm eyes that were now really visible for the first time.

"Robin! ... Why is he like that?"

" like what, y/n?"

" like so... so... so arghhhhh..., annoying ?! Angry? Attractive?!" You sighed and put your hands before your face. Not wanting even more people to see your blushing face.

Robin grinned again and took the book off her lap.

" so you do fancy him. Nami and I were right. ... hey Usopp! You owe me 50 berry!"

"Oh no. You did a bet on me ?!"

You loved Robin. She was the most beautiful, intelligent and loving woman you knew. But sometimes you were a tiny bit mad at her for knowing you so well. You couldn’t keep any secret from her. This woman had all the wisdom of the world (+ the gossip on the sunny ) in her head.

" I just don't get why someone who has that gorgeous hair and pretty smile, is such an asshole."

" Law isn't that terrible, Y/N. I told you he's just shy around new people. He'll make friends with you sooner than you know, I'm sure of it. And I don't think he hates you. He just doesn't know how to talk to you yet."

"Yeah, but he can't really get to know me and be my „ friend“, if he always leaves the room when I walk in.... I just want to know why he won't at least try to be friendly to me.

I mean, we have a lot in common. And I was really nice to him on his first day here. I showed him around the ship and even made him fresh juice from Nami’s trees and prepared his room. And all I got was a grumpy face and not a single comment.

And I just don’t know what is wrong with me?! He likes you guys, and he is so kind to Chopper." A sad frown making its way onto your face.

„sounds like you are jealous.“

Nami hadn’t really participated in the conversation yet. But she just enjoyed teasing you too much.

„ ahhh… just shut up, Nami.“

Now hiding your entire body under the beach towel you had brought with you.

You sigh after rolling your eyes for a moment. This wasn’t helping. You would have to find out what exactly his problem with you was.

Later that day, you helped Sanji in the kitchen. You were preparing some muffins for after dinner.

" Hey, can I ask you something?"

" Sure thing, honey. What's on your mind?"

Nervously, you bite your lip. Should you really ask Sanji for help? He certainly wasn't your first choice, but you felt you had to talk to a man. And the other men on board wouldn't be much help either.

„ but of course you are! You are incredibly beautiful and as pretty as a glowing nightsky or a bouquet of expensive flowers.“

Sanji was dancing around you with hearts in his eyes. Making weird noises while twirling like a ballerina.

That’s exactly why you were nervous. Surly Sanji wasn’t the right one to talk about this. But you at least had to try and find out what was wrong with you.

„ but like… do you like my personality too?“

„ yes of course sweetheart, you are the kindest, sweetest and most loving creature to ever bless my eyes.“

„and do you think that the others think so too? That I m helpful ? And kind ? And have a purpose on this ship?“

Sanji stopped dancing and looked at you seriously. „ why are you doubting yourself so much Y/N ? Of course the others think so too. You are part of our Nakama. What makes you think that way? „

Sanji stepped behind you and wrapping his arm around you. „Did the stupid Marimo say something again? I told you not to listen to the shit he says.“

You sat down on one of the chairs next to the kitchen table.

You immediately felt your chest tighten. You didn't want to cry. You really didn't. But the whole thing bothered you more than you initially thought.

"I just don't understand what I did wrong. I was only ever friendly and did everything I could to make him like me. But he hates me and I don't know why."

You sat uncomfortably on the chair with your legs drawn up. Sanji had never seen you so irritated.

" hey hey. It's all good, y/n. Who are you talking about?"

" The fucking Doctor, of course..."

Sanji smirked. He had almost suspected that. He had seen how you kept looking after the dark-haired man after he had ignored you and quickly left the room.

" I just don't get it! Why does he hate me? I've really tried everything, but he won't even look at me when I talk to him.

I've been asking myself for days... am I so ugly that he can't even bear to look at me? Is there really nothing to like about me?“

Hot tears started falling. Your flushed cheeks covered with them.

You didn't deserve all this attention you were hoping for. There was a reason nobody loved you. Something must be wrong with you. Something everybody probably knew, but was too afraid to tell you.

Were you this hard to love ? Why did you have to be so interested in this dude anyway?! Oh yeah, he was gorgeous to look at, intelligent like no other and had seen more of the world than you could ever dream of. Of course you had a stupid crush on him. But for him, you were only air. Or maybe something worse.

Sanji didn’t know if he should laugh or cry with you. He couldn’t believe how stupid you were. Almost as stupid as his captain and the dumb green haired swordsman.

„ y/n hey. Calm down. It’s okay. Nobody hates you. Shhh.“

His arms wrapped around you and held you in a tight embrace.

He almost chuckled thinking about what happend just a few hours before.

Law couldn’t take it anymore. The weather was already killing him. But seeing you in just your short bikini, laying just a few feet from him in the glistening sun. That was clearly to much.

He frowned under his breath. What a cruel joke. Almost as if his crew was behind an evil prank. Watching him, suffering all by himself.

He knew he was fucked the moment he saw you for the first time. He was just saying goodbye to his crew, when he spotted the newest crew member on deck. You were holding Chopper up like a toddler. Making sure he wasn’t gonna fall overboard, while still being able to see the other pirate ship.

Law had looked at you far to long for his liking. Your hair floating around you in the sea wind. And your bright smile lighting up his entire mood. You were mesmerizing.

How did Strawhat-ya always find these people? Law was almost jealous. Even tho he knew he wouldn’t be able to have a woman like you on his crew. It would never work out.

Looking up from his textbook he noticed you watching him again. In some wild fantasy in his head, he would wink at you now.

But Law was a serious man. He had things to do. And he couldn’t get distracted. Even tho the sight before him was definitely something he couldn’t forget in a while, he knew it wouldn’t be good if he was gonna stay sitting at this place. His mind was already wandering to very different places.

This wasn’t good.

Law exhaled and got up. He picked up the textbook before him and went inside. The kitchen wasn’t nearly as hot as the outside and definitely not as distracting.

The blonde cook was standing next to the stove preparing something that looked like dinner.

„ Hey. Is it okay if I sit here for a while?“

The cook turned around and gave him a kind smile.

„ sure. I don’t mind. Was it to hot for you outside?“

„ something like that.“ Law muttered, wishing he wouldn’t have noticed how the sentence had a double meaning. Ignoring Sanjis knowing grin he pretended to already be occupied with his book again.

During the afternoon, some crew members came by the kitchen. Law remained quietly seated at the table, absorbed in his studies.

Even when Nami and Robin entered the kitchen together, still dressed only in their bathing suits, Law did not look up from his work. There was no reaction to be seen on his face.

The others had been observing this behavior for a while. And Sanji was pretty sure by now.

His expression was mostly relaxed or thoughtful. Busy with his work. But that could change abruptly. Because Law showed some other forms of reaction as soon as you entered the room.

You had fallen asleep in the afternoon sun and after finding the deck empty, the first thing you did was head for the kitchen. A glass of water was now your only salvation.

Sanji saw you climb the stairs to the kitchen. And even though he would have liked to continue looking out of the window, enchanted by your face, he had more important things to do. His gaze darted back to the Surgeon of Death as inconspicuously as possible.

When you entered the room, he had already given himself away. Law's face was strangely tense. His eyes stared as unnaturally as Sanji had ever seen them, at the sheet of paper in front of him.

Bingo.

Sanji knew exactly what was going on.

Only when y/n turned to Sanji did Law look up from his book.

Law had to swallow. The view in front of him made him freeze for a moment. His mind going absolutely blank.

The next time Sanji turned his gaze to Law, he held his hand in front of his nose. He rushed out of the kitchen with a bright red head.

Sanji couldn't help but grin. So he had been right all along.

Nami, Robin and Sanji whispered through the night. Their captain laying and snoring between them. Luffy had initially been very excited about this secret meeting. But after he had found out that it was only about you and Law, he had fallen asleep from boredom.

"Haha, I knew it." Nami was beaming from ear to ear.

"Usopp doesn't stand a chance. I'll be rich tomorrow!!!"

"Oh Nami love, it can't just be all about money for you, can it? After all, it's about love, devotion and passion. Law is so attracted to Y/N that he can't even stand to be in the same room with her."

Sanji got heart eyes. "That's the most romantic thing I've ever witnessed. Oh to be in lovee..."

Robin giggled. "So what exactly are we going to do now?“

„ We have to get them to confess to each other !!“ Nami hushed to her friends „and not just for the money“ she added while holding her hands up in the air. Signaling a promise.

„ Maybe we could set up a romantic date for the two of them. I could cook their favorite meals and“ Sanjis lovestruck face suddenly changed into a dark frown.

„ Watch over them, because if Traffy tries to hurt my dear Y/Ns feelings I will kill him.“

„ Oh we shouldn’t do that Sanji, it would be more than stupid to do that. If he hurts her I will simply give him to the marines. At least we could make a profit like that.“ Nami was grinning proudly at her plan.

„ My dear friends, I don’t think that’s gonna happen. Let’s see, Franky said that he didn’t have time yet to repair the door to our storage room yet… let’s say for some unknown reason he doesn’t repair it until in a few days? I m sure there is enough other work around the sunny!“

„ What are you suggesting Robin, Dear?“

The dark haired woman placed her chin on her hand, grinning into the blonde cooks face with a mischievous look in her eyes.

„ You’ll see Sanji. You’ll see.“

[shuawonie]

my promise.

pairing | yoon jeonghan x fem!reader

genre | angst, fluff, idol au, jeonghan!soft boyfriend, established relationship, hurt-comfort

wc | 1.8k

warnings | mentions of mental health problems, lots of pet names (angel, sweetheart, love), family issues, kissing.

summary: when the the dark days when you felt worthless came, your sweet boyfriend was always the one to help you. however, recently, as he’s preparing for the new album, you are afraid to disturb him in his work. but how could you forget about his promise?

a/n: i’m sorry for being inactive past few months </3 i had a really hard time in my life, but now as everything is better, i’m comimg back to you all with a new angst-fluff fanfic with our angel, jeonghan <3 hope you’ll enjoy it ! ( ´ ▽ ` ).｡ｏ♡

You immediately knew.

Right when you woke up, you could feel that today was going to be one of those days. With your tendency of bottling your emotions inside of you, there had to come a day where all of it would come out.

And not having Jeonghan next to you right when you opened your eyes in the morning to calm you down, made everything even worse.

He was your comfort, your peace, your safe place. Without him by your side, everything seemed colorless. That boy could make your smile come back again just by seeing his face. However, each of his smirks when he looked at you, his sweet laugh, and his warm and cozy hugs were still your favorite things.

And you did understand that since the boys were preparing for their comeback, they had to practice hard. But deep down, you hoped that Jeonghan could be with you all day, keeping you close to him, whispering sweet nothings into your ear, while making you sink into his scent that you adored so much.

Your gaze slowly moved to the window next to your bed, noticing that the rain was pouring pretty bad outside. Even the sky was crying with you.

Not so long after, the first tears ran down your cheek as you couldn’t hold them back anymore.

Recently, life has been really rough to you, not making it easier to keep a smile on your face. When you already had enough of your boss at work, then that one, stupid girl was making your situation even worse. Whatever you did, she always had to make a competition from it. And the fact that frustrated you the most, was that most of the time, she was doing your work even better than you.

Additionally, of course you had to get into another quarrel with your sibling. As if they couldn’t just leave you alone. You both had separate lives so why did they have to disturb you?

The cherry on top was your overthinking. About literally everything. About your life, your future, what could you do to finally love yourself, and also about your relationship with Jeonghan.

Are you a good girlfriend to him? Does he already have enough of you? Are you even enough for him?

Yeah, those days have always sucked. And you knew that there was only one medication for it. Yoon Jeonghan. If you could at least hear his voice.. No, you shouldn’t call him. He was practicing, and eventually he’ll come home later..? You deeply hoped that the ‘later’ will actually come quickly.

But as you were deep in your thoughts once again, the part of you which wanted to call him had taken control of your body. Quickly, you reached over to the bedside table for your phone, and opened your contacts immediately. You hesitated for a moment when you clicked on Jeonghan’s profile, however not even a second later you clicked the call button.

And after a few signals, you heard, “Yes, angel?”

Your boyfriend’s voice at the other side of the call sounded so sweet but at the same time he sounded exhausted, making the tears roll up to your eyes once again, threatening to fall any second.

Shit, you really needed him.

You let out a shaky sigh, “Hannie..” your voice was almost inaudible.

Even when you called him, you haven’t thought about what you wanted to tell him.

“Are you okay?”

You wanted to say that everything was fine, that you were fine. But you couldn't.

And this question made the tears in your eyes fall down really quickly, “Nothing’s right..” you cried into the phone, which made Jeonghan’s heart squeeze painfully. He knew that things had to be rough if you were crying.

His voice immediately became softer, “You’re crying..” he whispered, worried, “Are you home?” Jeonghan asked gently.

“Yes..” you sobbed, just unable to get it under control. He immediately hung up, and not knowing what to do, you started to cry even louder.

You snuggled into the sheets of your bed, muffling the sounds of your cries. And like that, you slowly fell asleep one more time, with tears still coming down your eyes.

The sound of thunder outside made you open your eyes, with your heart beating rapidly. Your breathing was irregular, and you felt hot. Especially from your back. And that was when you finally realized that a pair of slender arms were wrapped around your waist, keeping you close.

“Did you sleep well, angel?” you heard Jeonghan’s concerned voice behind you.

The boy left a soft kiss on your neck, making you shudder at his gentle action. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.” he snuggled closer to you, and you turned around to look at him.

You knew that you probably looked awful, with your eyes red from crying, cheeks puffy from the tears that rolled down past few hours, and your hair messy.

But there he was, laying next to you, looking like a literal angel. His long, black hair was spreaded peacefully all over the pillow. He was dressed in fresh clothes, as he probably took a quick shower after the practice. His eyes shone beautifully, holding all of the stars from the universe in them. So ethereal, and so unreal.

You were glad that he was here with you.

“I’m s-sorry..” you whispered, with your voice starting to break, “I shouldn’t have called you. You’re busy preparing for your new album, and you still probably haven’t eaten.. it was selfish of me to not think about-” Jeonghan quickly shushed you by placing his lips on top of yours, connecting you in a sweet and full of love kiss.

The boy smiled softly, and tugged the messy hair strand behind your ear, “Stop saying nonsense, sweetheart.” he muttered, “You know that you can call me everytime, no matter what. I’m always here for you, love.” he said, to which a fresh turn of tears appeared in the corners of your eyes.

Jeonghan chuckled lightly and reached to gently wipe the tears from your eyes with his thumb.

“I feel like I’m a burden to you, Jeonghan.”

The silence in your room was overwhelming, only interrupted by the rain tapping against the window. You looked at Jeonghan, and your breath immediately hitched in your lungs as you found him staring at you, stunned. Your eyes wandered on his face, trying to catch every single emotion that he showed.

“I.. feel like I’m something that’s stopping you from what you’re doing. That..” your voice broke, feeling how your throat started to clench, “That I shouldn’t be with you.”

And even if you wanted him to scream at you, ask if you lost your mind, tell you that you’re stupid for thinking like that… nothing like this happened.

The boy only reached both of his hands to you, while scooping your fragile body and placing you on top of him. The steady beating of his heart was calming you, and his warmth soothed your nerves. You placed your head in the crook of his neck, breathing in his scent that immediately made you feel safe.

“I’m sorry.” Jeonghan whispered, “I’m sorry if I made you feel that way.” his voice was fragile, almost not hearable.

“However, I need you to know that you’re never a burden to me. Never.” his hands were wandering over your back, caressing it gently.

“I need you in my life, y/n.” he stated, and a sob escaped from your lips which made Jeonghan shiver, “Because without you, I’m no one.”

“Liar.” you mumbled through your tears, “No, I’m speaking the truth. From the depth of my heart.”

After a while, when you finally calmed down, the boy started once again, “You can’t let someone make you feel that you’re a failure, because you’re not. I love every part of you, every single one, my angel. You’re the most precious person I’ve ever met, and you’re not unlovable, don’t even let yourself think like that.” he kept reassuring you, your tears falling onto the collar of his black t-shirt, making it damp.

“T-thank you..” you whispered, feeling a pleasant warmth spreading in your chest.

You truly needed to hear those words.

Suddenly, the boy turned both of you over, to which now he was above you, supporting himself with his arms. The sight of Jeonghan’s mesmerizing eyes above you, made you gasp for a breath.

“I promised to love and care about you, didn’t I?” he said with a cocky grin, and you immediately looked at your promise ring that was on your ring finger.

In the moment of your distraction, he leaned down, and left a kiss on your forehead, “I love this part of you,” he said, then he kissed your temple, “and this,” he kissed your cheek, to which to let out a small chuckle, “and this” he kissed your nose, “and I love this the most.” he left a hungry and full of love kiss on your lips, to which you immediately reciprocated.

When Jeonghan pulled back, the sound of your sweet giggles was heard in the room, immediately warming the cockles of his heart. It was his favorite sound. He could listen to it everyday and all the time.

Another turn of butterfly kisses was left all over your face to which you laughed out loud brightly.

“I love you.” Jeonghan said suddenly, with a big grin on his lips, and love visible in his eyes.

You placed your hand on his cheek, making him melt under your gentle touch as he slowly closed his eyes.

Those three words were still making an impression on you. Especially when Jeonghan spoke those words. To you.

“I love you more.” you replied, and brought him closer to you, connecting both of you in another kiss.

“Okay sweetheart, I promised to also care for you, so we need to eat something.” he said, and a groan left your lips at the bare thought of getting out of bed and preparing the food.

“But don’t worry, I ordered takeout food for us.” he added, to which your eyes immediately shone with excitement, making Jeonghan laugh at your cute reaction.

He truly loved you.

That’s how Jeonghan was completing his promise of loving and caring about you. Because if Yoon Jeonghan did make a promise, you had to expect him to fulfill it.

And he always did it flawlessly.

© shuawonie | 2023, all rights reserved.

reuploads and likes are highly appriciated ♡

[cantalouupe]

having thots…..of cockwarming puppy luc……perhaps as a punishment…..

so sorry for this, it is not great but i wanted to post something and i've been eyeing up this ask since it was first sent to me </3

if there are mistakes i am sorry

nsfw!!! puppyboy!diluc x gn!reader

cockwarming, "punishments", diluc has ears and a tail and is referred to as a "hybrid" once, PUPPY DILUC

It was a little cruel, maybe. The tight crushing heat, enveloping him in a warm, wet cocoon that set his body temperature perilously high—gods, he wouldn’t accidentally set anything on fire, would he? He always feels like he has no control over himself when he’s with you, brain gone haywire like a computer being reprogrammed; or worse, like a virus, taking over the entire system and destroying everything, devolving until all that was left was you. 

He’s impatient, always in haste to get moving, to get off. You were surprised he’s lasted as long as he had. Usually, he would be ceaseless in his squirming and whining, asking you over and over if he could have you the way he wanted. Today, he seemed caught up in the current situation, sitting hard and still beneath you, not speaking until you deliberately shifted atop him, jostling him inside slightly.  

“Please,” he begs, “let me.” 

“Not yet, Diluc.” 

The tone of his voice twists into something frustrated, hands balling into fists, kept uselessly by his sides. You warned him when this had begun, a tsked “no touching” when he’d try to mold his hands against the smooth curve of your body. As touchy as he was, you note his restraint in not lifting his hands above his thighs, and mentally praise him, almost going to press your own hand against his face, touch his soft ears atop his head, and tell him how good he was being—no, there would be another time for that.  

Still, you can’t help but admire him. His obedience was something you reveled in; knowing someone as big and powerful as he is, willing and eager to wait for your permission, work for your rewards, and live for your praise. He could overpower you quite easily, if he wanted to. It wouldn’t be the first time, nor would it be the last, but despite this piece of information you are both aware of, he chooses not to. The need to be good outweighed the limited, finite pleasure he could chase for him. Though he’d been a little slow, mind lagging behind from all the time spent with the constant pressure of you around him and perched atop him, he understands that there would be consequences, ‘worse’ than that which he was being subjected to now. An unsatisfying, incomplete pleasure is more favorable than none at all. 

You begin to grow suspicious of him, though, when time ticks sluggishly by and his begging does not evolve into something more desperate. With careful movements you shift again, and you hear it, the hitch in his uneven breath, like a gasp at the unexpected movement. He waits for it, anticipating each subtle gyration and adjustment and meeting it with a small noise. You realize, a little too excitedly for someone dishing out a punishment, that he was even more affected by this than you could have imagined—he would end up coming from this, from you punishing him, cockwarming him for minutes and minutes and minutes, until time felt endless and the place where the two of you joined together became a fuzzily comfortable sensation. You thought he’d cry, make his sweet, pathetic noises while trying to convince you to let him have his way, but he’d managed a way around it, phasing through the punishment as if it wasn’t one in the first place. 

“You’re not supposed to be getting off on this.” 

If he does hear, he doesn’t respond, too busy preparing himself for the inevitable fall that he craves so badly. He starts to tense, head tilting back ever so slightly, body arching and growing taught as the pleasure mounted and overwhelmed him. His mouth is parted a bit, just enough for him to pant out hot puffs of air while he struggled to breathe properly, and it entices you, pulling you in until your breaths were mingled. You shouldn’t kiss him, really, not when you’re supposed to be disciplining him—it wouldn’t matter much now, seeing as this is barely a punishment any longer—so you don’t, but you stay close, leaning into his space. 

He whimpers a strained “’m g’nna come,” and you know that it’s too late to stop it. Pulling yourself off him would only push him there faster, the side of you slick and stimulating on his sensitive cock after being still for so long.  

Despite your plans being foiled, you’re a little awed. With just the sensation from him being inside you, no movement at all, he managed to reach his end easily; almost as easily as if he was fucking you normally. You’re still while you watch it, but decide to lift up a smidge so he can grind up while he works through his slowly built orgasm, letting him have these ending moments to move. As he rides out the waves, filling you to the brim with everything he had to give, you belatedly realize that that you’ve practically rewarded him, let him get away with exactly what he wasn’t supposed to do throughout this. He would never learn at this rate, with the way each punishment turning into a reward for him, a newly developed kink that’d be crossed off the list of potential ideas of acts that could work as a form of discipline.  

[augustghosts]

Stewy Hosseini x female reader fic that i once again have no title for

SEEEEE i told you i was gonna write this. Part 2 of this but you can defo read it alone! This took me months because I’ve been busy getting fired from two jobs in a row and losing my mind but i’m kinda back <3

Word Count: 2.9k

Warnings: 18+ pls because this is smuuuuuut - Apparently I can't help myself. Fem reader. Oral and pinv, the usual. A little bit of angst and jealousy. Final warnings are my bad writing and no proofreading because I'm lazy.

The same hotel bar, the same stool and the same eyes watching you from across the room. 6 months later, this time a birthday party. Apparently this place is a popular party destination among the rich and boring. Although now, it is associated with a night you would rather forget. You and Stewy ghosting each other after that night was not something either of you intended. He’s busy, you know that. But you can’t help but feel some resentment as you look over at him. Maybe because of the ghosting, but it’s definitely not because of the girl he’s talking to. The girl who’s currently caressing his arm and looking into his eyes a little too intently as he talks. She laughs loudly and you cringe, your fingers tightening on the wine glass in your hand. What could he possibly be saying? He’s not that funny. You shake your head with a sigh at the thought, because - fuck, he is that funny. He’s made you laugh like that a million times.

Eventually you decide enough is enough, you gather your things and make a conscious effort not to look over at where Stewys and his new friends are sitting. You say your goodbyes to the birthday girl, someone you’ve only met once and she looks at you like she couldn’t care less whether you live or die. Rich and boring. Whipping out your phone to order a car and mentally preparing yourself to stand in the cold and wait for it takes all of your attention, so you miss the fact that someone had noticed you leaving and followed you out. You jump out of your skin at the footsteps behind you and whirl around ready to face the culprit. Whatever obscenities you were about to throw at the ghost that had snuck up on you got caught in your throat as you’re faced with a pair of familiar brown eyes.

“Jesus,” Stewy says. The corner of his mouth twitches with a smile, although he looks just as shocked as you. “Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you, I thought you heard me.”

“Well I didn’t.” You say, your hand still glued to your chest - your heart racing.

“Sorry.” He repeats. His smile falters when he realizes you aren���t as happy to see him as he is to see you.

“Where’s your girlfriend?” You ask, looking over his shoulder. You regret it as soon as it leaves your mouth because it sounds so fucking childish, also because the way he grins at you makes you want to slap him.

“Who?” He smiles. He knows exactly who you’re talking about. Despite talking to her all night, his eyes have been on you. Watching you angrily glance over at him. He wasn’t even interested in her, in all honesty, and a part of him feels bad for wasting her time all night. But a bigger part of him was getting a kick out of making you jealous. He just can’t help himself.

“No girlfriend.” He says when you don’t respond, you just roll your eyes and look back down at your phone. He peeks over your shoulder at what you’re doing and boldly tries to take your phone out of your hand. “No need for that, I'll give you a ride home.”

“Hey!” You hold your phone out of his reach and scoff a ‘no thank you’.

“Why not? Come on, I'm on my way out and I’m not leaving you standing out in the cold waiting for some creep to come pick you up.” His warm hand wraps around your elbow as he speaks. You’re a goner, you want to let him drive you home - or let his driver drive you home. You want that girl to see you get in the car with him and you can’t help but think about his hands wandering in the back seat. He watches you with a grin as you wrack your brain, trying to come up with an excuse to say no. But alas, one doesn’t come. It’s like your brain short circuited when he touched you - so ridiculous.

“Fine.” You say, letting him pull you towards his vehicle.

“Wow,” He laughs. “You gave up easily, I expected more of a fight.”

“I can still change my mind,” You stop in your tracks. “You can take your new girlfriend home instead.”

“Shut up.” He mumbles, his arm moving to wrap protectively around your waist this time as he guides you to the car. Fuck, what were you doing? Why does he always have this effect on you? But little do you know, he’s thinking the same fucking thing. He came here tonight hoping he wouldn’t see you. There was a quick second where he actually did think about taking the other woman home. But one look at you and he knew he couldn’t do it, it’s always been you for him. No one compares.

“So, yours?” He asks once you're both in the car, after he gallantly opened the door for you and helped you step into the vehicle. You nod, and the car ride is uncharacteristically silent. He doesn’t really know what to say and he knows you’ve always felt awkward speaking in front of random drivers. You much prefer it when he drives, unfortunately he didn’t know at the beginning of the night that he would be in a car with you. He would have happily sacrificed drinking to drive here in an expensive car and show off to you.

When the car stops outside your familiar apartment you both linger awkwardly.

“Am I allowed in?” He asks, his cheeky smile almost breaking your stoic act.

“No.” You say, opening the door and stepping out. You’re lucky that he knows you so well, that he recognises your sarcasm and could tell by the look in your eyes that you wanted him to follow you.

Stewy fishes for his wallet in his pocket and hands way too much money to the confused driver. “Don’t wait. Thanks, man.”

He practically jumps out of the car and races into the building, finding you waiting for him by the elevator. There’s suddenly an awkwardness in the air, neither of you wanting to address the ghosting after sex six months ago. The elevator is moving way to fucking slowly and you finally decide to just ask.

“Why didn’t you call?”

Stewy sighs, suddenly he feels like the elevator is way to small and moving way to fucking slowly.

“Why didn’t you?” Is all he can come up with. Stupid, he thinks. He doesn’t have an excuse so his immediate response is to get defensive. Fortunately, you recognise this in him.

“I was just asking.” You mumble. “Thought you might want to tell me about your girlfriend.”

Stewy, who was previously leaning against the elevator wall in an embarrassingly attractive way, stands up straight and throws his hands in the air.

“Will you drop it?” He asks, his voice sounds louder than he intended it to be. The small elevator that he suddenly feels trapped in making his voice echo off the walls. “I don’t have a fucking girlfriend and I don’t know why i didn’t call you. I just didn’t, okay?”

The bell that sounds as the doors slide open makes him jump and he’s the first to leave. You follow silently, suddenly wishing you hadn’t got into his car. He walks to your apartment door, knowing the way like the back of his hand.

“Why did you come? Because, honestly I’m confused.” You ask him as you reach the door. Standing in front of him, he’s so much taller than you but you force yourself to look into his eyes as you speak. “I assumed you didn’t call because you didn’t want to do this again. That’s the vibe you gave me. Now you’re following me home and arguing with me in the elevator. Why are you here?”

“Fuck-i, can you open the door?” He hesitates, looking around down the empty corridor.

“No.” You stand your ground. “Why are you here?”

“Because-“ He starts to speak but, fuck. He’s too much of a pussy to tell you he loves you. That he still loves you. So he does what he does best and kisses you instead. Your first instinct is to push him away and keep arguing. Demand an answer. But he’s so good at this, he makes it so easy to forget why you’re even mad at him. All that matters is that he’s here in front of you. Kissing you in front of your door and murmuring against your lips about opening the door.

You do as he asks, pulling away from his lips and fishing for your key. Once the door swings open you grasp his shoulders and pull him into the room, your lips meet him again and he slams the door behind you both. He grasps your hips to push you up against the door, smiling against your lips as you whine into his mouth. No, you had to tell him what you wanted to say.

“I thought you didn’t want me, or that you regretted it.” You pull away from his lips to blurt out. He looks surprised at first, but his eyes soften and you sense something else, guilt? He doesn’t know how to respond, god knows he’s never been good at talking about feelings. But god also knows that he’s damn good at showing them.

“Does this feel like I don't want you?” He asks, his voice drops into that deliciously low growl that you love. He pushed his hips into you, his erection pressing against your thigh. “Of course I don’t regret it. Not you.”

You smile up at him, he always knows what to say - and whether you believe it or not, it works.

“How about I show you how much I want you?” He whispers in your ear. “I’ve always dreamed about bending you over in front of this window. We can show the whole city how much I want you. How about that?”

You blush as he gestures to the floor to ceiling windows, the sprawling city underneath. Holy shit. Your words fail you as you look over his shoulder at the window. Although it sounds hot, you can’t help but be embarrassed at the thought of being seen. Although you’re several floors up from the busy streets below, someone might still look up at the right moment and get lucky.

“Come on.” He grins down at you, enjoying seeing you speechless. Leading you over to the couch, his hands make quick work of your dress and he shrugs off his own jacket. God, you always loved seeing him in just a button up shirt - the first few buttons undone like they are now. His hair is slightly messy. All he needed to do was roll up his sleeves a little and you’d be a goner.

His lips find yours again, his hands cradling your face as he kisses you as only an expert knows how. He places one final and playful kiss onto your lips before he grabs your shoulders and maneuvers you down onto the couch. Once you're seated he sinks down to his knees and you groan as he pushes up his fucking sleeves, sometimes you swear that he’s a mind reader.

He lifts one of your legs up, pressing a kiss to your ankle before resting your knee on his shoulder. He starts at your thighs - gentle kisses, his eyes watching you closely.

“God, you’re so fucking pretty baby.” He all but groans before he finally dives in, the first gentle sweep of his tongue has you leaning your head back against the couch with a sigh. He’s so skilled, it kind of pisses you off. You writhe and use his thumbs to gain access to your clit. His big brown eyes watching you all the while as he does everything he knows you love.

He thinks you look gorgeous, he always does, but never as much as you do right now. Your hands find his hair as a car horn from outside catches your attention. You almost forgot that he was eating you out on a couch in front of a huge window and it makes you laugh. He glances up at the sound of your breathy giggle and smirks against your skin.

He incorporates his fingers, expertly pressing into that spot inside of you that is guaranteed to finish the job. Though he holds off, slows down and takes his time. Reveling in your moans and whines as he slowly brings you to the edge.

There was something the both of you found painfully addictive about each other, and neither of you had figured it out yet. You wonder if you ever would. He loves seeing you fall apart for him, loves having you mewling at the end of his tongue. He works you gently through your orgasm, his mouth feeling like home around your swollen clit. He pulls away from you with a grin, dramatically wiping his mouth with the back of his hand - his tongue dipping out to further taste you when he licks his lips.

He stands up, towering over you as he rids himself of his shirt. You sit up, your hands flying to help him with his belt as he sheds the rest of his clothes. He climbs on top of you, you’re trapped underneath him on the couch - there's nowhere else you’d rather be. You’re suddenly thankful that you were able to afford a decent sized piece of furniture, because as awkward as sex on a couch is, it would be worse on a small one.

“Should we go to bed?” You ask, a last ditch attempt. His eyes travel to the window and you can see him thinking about it.

“No.” He finally answers. “I’ve been desperate to fuck you all night.”

He ends his sentence by taking his hard cock into his hand and lining himself up with your entrance.

“All night?” You tease. “Even while-“

“Yes, even while I was talking to my girlfriend.” He cuts you off, anticipating the joke long before you had even thought it up.

“Oh? So now she is your girlfriend?”

You’re annoying him, but the smile on your face and the way you’re laughing makes him smile back and laugh with you. He decides to shut you up, by sliding his fingers into your mouth. Your eyes widen but you take them easily- sliding your tongue over his fingers.

“Good girl.” He mumbles as he slides his now wet fingers out of your mouth and brings them down to your clit, pressing slow circles into it as he pushes into you. He holds still for a moment, his forehead dropping to press against yours. You grasp at his face as he starts to move, pulling his face down to yours so that you can sloppily kiss him as he fucks you.

He knows you inside out, making it look effortless as he makes you feel better than anyone else ever had. He’s talking you through it, whispering dirty things into your neck but you can hardly hear him over your own whimpers. He keeps up his pace, his lips are at your ear now - calling you beautiful, telling you how good your pussy feels and how much he loves hearing you moan his name.

“Fuck, i can feel you baby.” He moans, his skilled fingers slide down to your clit again.

“I’m so close.” You whine, you feel his hips stutter. Knowing he’s close too. You’re walls squeezing him - pulling him to the edge along with you.

“Come on baby.” He groans. “Come for me.”

You cling to his shoulders as you ride out your release, his name leaving your lips as if it's the only word you know. He carries on for a few more thrusts before he tenses and stills. Filling you up deliciously and equally beautiful moans of your name reaches your ears. Suddenly everything is calmer, your thumping heart beat and Stewy’s heavy breaths are the only sounds.

He slips out of you and sits up on the couch, helping you sit up next to him. You reach down for his shirt, suddenly feeling exposed - sitting naked on the couch. If you were in bed you could have pulled the covers over you, but his shirt that smells like his expensive cologne is just as good.

“So, are you gonna call this time?” You joke, breaking the ice.

“I don’t know.” He answers. “I might go home and call my new girlfriend instead.”

You look at him in pretend shock, pulling away halfheartedly when he reaches for you. You both laugh as he pulls you into his chest, his heart still hammering against your ear - his warm hands traveling up and down your back. You love him. That's the conclusion you’ve come to after tonight. So, what the fuck are you supposed to do now?

[ysmtttty]

Red Ferrari

Chapter 5

Azris AU, where Azriel is a mechanic and has his own service station. One day, Eris comes there because something is wrong with his car.

AO3 link Chapter 4 Chapter 6

Eris woke up to the rays of the sun and scolded himself for leaving the curtains open. For a second, he panicked at how much he had overslept, but then he remembered that it was Saturday and technically his day off. Not that it had stopped him before, but today he was ready to reprioritize and send productivity far, far away.

Last night had been... something. He felt it in the soreness, in the pulling pain in the places where bites and hickeys were scattered all over his body. Well, at least it was a sign that it had been real, since it hadn't felt real at all.

Eris ran his hand over the other half of the bed, feeling only cold sheets, and let out a disappointed sigh. Yes, maybe he had hoped Azriel would stay. A little. Just a tiny bit. Especially after Azriel had stayed last night, lying behind him and kissing his shoulder blades while Eris drifted off to sleep from exhaustion.

Well, not everything in life went the way we wanted, and in Eris's life, not much was going according to plan right now, although he was diligently trying to fix that.

After lying in bed a little longer, he got up, picking up his conveniently folded, though not particularly neat, clothes from the bedside table. For a second, he wanted to hit himself for thinking this gesture was cute.

Throwing on a shirt and gray pants, he went downstairs, hoping to have some coffee and maybe order some food, but he heard sounds coming from the kitchen even as he was on the stairs. Frowning and already preparing to grab a shoehorn as the first weapon that came to hand, Eris glanced toward the entryway. He was quite surprised when he saw Azriel's sneakers still present there.

Eris went to the kitchen, finding Azriel there. Dressed and standing with his back to him, rustling with some bag that hadn't been in his apartment before. As he approached, Eris couldn't help but notice the hickey-covered neck, which no collar would hide, and he mentally wondered how terrible he himself looked.

"Are you trying to rob my kitchen?" came the voice from behind. Azriel continued rummaging through the bag, brought from the store he had visited just ten minutes ago, spending twice as much as planned. Damn rich neighborhoods and their markups.

"Quite the opposite," he smiled and turned to Eris, who looked at him as if he were either a ghost or just an idiot because what was he even doing in his apartment that morning? By all rights, he should have been the first to run off, grabbing his clothes.

And honestly? Maybe that would have saved him from the typical awkward morning conversation. And Azriel had almost left, he had a whole hour to do so. But something at first kept him from getting out of bed; his favorite excuse was that the room was too cold and the bed seemed warm, and... if he were completely honest, Eris's body also radiated warmth, pleasant and comfortable warmth. Then he finally got out of bed and walked around the apartment with his bare butt, playing a find-your-clothes quest, since his clothes were scattered literally throughout the entire place and no, it was by no means a small place; and then something once again kept him from cowardly fleeing.

Unlikely his conscience, as with a mechanic overcharging without any problem, there was still little left of it. And certainly not love, because how could he be in love with Eris? But still, part of his mind screamed that after the stunt with the ignoring, his current escape would count as something equally bastardly. And a bastard was the last thing Azriel wanted to be right now. Any other time? No problem. Today and towards Eris? No, thank you.

"I wanted to make breakfast," Azriel said, almost laughing when Eris's eyes widened a bit in surprise. "But your fridge was as good as empty. Seriously, I could believe you were a vampire living off the blood of commoners."

"Judging by the fact that you're still alive and your carotid artery is quite intact, I ask you to take your supernatural suspicions off me," Eris shook his head, coming closer. "And responding to accusations against my fridge, I don't cook. My housekeeper does, but she's on vacation this week, so I'm living off deliveries."

"Well, it's too late now because I bought groceries, and you're about to try the best omelet of your life," Azriel said with feigned self-confidence.

"All right, my kitchen is all yours, Gordon Ramsay," Eris sat at the bar, watching Azriel take charge in his kitchen.

Azriel was amazed at how Eris knew absolutely nothing about his own kitchen. Every time he asked where something was, Eris shrugged and answered, "I don't know." The only thing he could answer was where the coffee mugs were and explain how to use the coffee machine, which Azriel at first tried to fiddle with and then gave up, deciding to figure it out later.

In just ten minutes, Azriel placed two plates of omelets in front of him. He could call it his culinary masterpiece, but breakfast was literally a mixture of eggs with everything he found and bought at the supermarket.

Eris poked at the omelet with his fork before taking a bite. Azriel thought about how he wanted to hear a positive reaction from him. Just wanted to. A silly whim.

"I have to admit, it's very tasty," Eris said, justifying his hope.

Azriel couldn't hold back a smile as Eris continued to eat. And damn, he was so beautiful. Impossibly so. Utterly unfairly. With marks on his skin that Azriel had carefully left on him last night, with sharp facial features, with those damn freckles.

"Your omelet is getting cold," Eris noted. "You can look and eat at the same time."

Azriel rolled his eyes at that smug tone and knowing grin.

"As you say," he grumbled and grabbed his fork.

They ate breakfast in silence, after which Eris stacked the plates in the sink and moved to the coffee machine to make them coffee. Azriel made no secret of staring at his butt while he stood with his back to him.

"This is surprisingly not awkward," he said suddenly. Eris raised an eyebrow questioningly as he approached the counter with two mugs of coffee. "Being here. In the morning."

"Does this mean I've earned a call or a message?" he asked mockingly, taking a sip of coffee. Azriel regretted speaking up for a second.

"Hey, I kind of apologized," he said in weak defense. "Several times."

"Hmm," Eris drawled.

"What do you mean, 'hmm'?"

"I don't think I consider sex as an apology."

Oh. Well, damn.

Azriel looked at him for a long time, not knowing what he should say. Because yesterday, it seemed like they had sort of smoothed things over and everything was resolved. However, now Eris was telling him that he still didn't forgive him for the ignoring. Deservedly? Yes. Did Azriel know what to do? Oh no, absolutely not.

In any other situation, he would have immediately called Cassian or Rhysand, demanding quick advice because despite how he criticized their advice, once a year, they were still helpful. However, now he had a) a broken phone; b) he was in the middle of a conversation and had nowhere to run.

"I could apologize on my knees," Azriel said instead. Eris smirked into his coffee mug. "What? You didn't complain yesterday."

In response, Eris just shook his head and continued to drink his coffee. Okay. Perhaps Azriel really regretted that his last relationship was long ago and not very successful because now he could use some experience. He really didn't have much experience with apologies.

He didn't even catch the moment when it went from "get laid once" to "I need to find a way to apologize to Eris." Nevertheless, it felt right. It felt right to be here in the morning and think about how to apologize for his bastard behavior.

"How about revenge, then?" Azriel said.

"Revenge?" Eris asked, raising an eyebrow, sounding both nonchalant and intrigued, clearly trying to mask interest.

"I'll invite you on a date; you can ignore me afterward," Azriel smiled, pleased with his idea to no end. Eris blinked a couple of times before smiling.

"So you're inviting me?"

Azriel smiled wider and nodded. "I can even do it officially. Eris, would you like to go on a date with me?"

"I'll think about it," Eris replied importantly. Azriel just rolled his eyes, sipping his coffee before it cooled.

"I don't have multiple cars to ask in a new one each time, but you're a lawyer; I can commit different minor offenses every day to call you under a new pretext," Azriel said, turning their situation around one hundred eighty degrees. "Just don't make it escalate to murder."

"I'm afraid my services are not affordable for an ordinary mechanic," Eris smirked, setting his mug on the counter and resting his chin on his intertwined fingers.

"I'm sure we can negotiate a payment method," Azriel mirrored his smile.

Eris chuckled softly and rolled his eyes. Azriel noticed himself breaking into a grin. Damn. He hadn't felt like this in a long time, simply enjoying spending time with someone.

"Next Friday, say, at seven," Azriel said. "Just don't expect a car show. I have a slightly more limited budget and fewer connections."

"Fortunately for you, I'm tired of expensive restaurants and VIP boxes. Besides, I'm very curious about what you consider a regular date."

"So the real me."

"The real you," Eris nodded.

"Deal," Azriel agreed, though his mind was chaotically and wildly pondering possible places for the date.

When Azriel finished his coffee, he lingered for a few more minutes, feeling that, for some strange reason, he still didn't want to leave. Eris leaned against the kitchen counter, crossing his arms over his chest and watching him attentively as if trying to understand what he was thinking. Or maybe that was his way of silently telling him, "Get lost already," and Azriel just couldn't take the hint.

In any case, he soon remembered that he still had to pick up his car from the parking lot, buy a new phone, and go to Cassian because he had agreed to help him choose a gift for the "anniversary" of his acquaintance with Nesta. He wasn't sure if Nesta would be pleased, but he had promised to help anyway.

"I'm going," Azriel said. "I solemnly swear to text this time, send all the details, and... see you."

"See you," Eris saluted him with a small smile, watching him as Azriel put on his shoes and left the apartment.

"Where would you take Nesta on a date if she agreed?" Azriel asked while they were wandering through countless shops. Rhysand was staring at his phone, not even paying attention to them. Cassian was like a child, staring at all the shop windows around with adoration.

"Huh?" He realized the question was directed at him. "I don't know. Probably to a ballet or just a theater. Feyre said she loved those things when she was a child."

"Feyre?" Rhysand looked up, apparently treating the name like a keyword that caught his attention. Azriel and Cassian both rolled their eyes. "What?"

"At least pretend you're listening," Cassian grumbled, then turned back to Azriel. "What's the question for? Did Elain say something yesterday?"

Elain. Right, it all started with him agreeing to give Elain a ride to the restaurant yesterday. Right now, it seemed so distant that Azriel didn't immediately realize it was less than a day ago. However, he wasn't planning to tell his friends about what happened just yet. It might distract Cassian from their search, and they would definitely make him tell as much as possible. And while this was never a problem for him before, now Azriel felt a need to keep this moment intimate. Or maybe he was just tired of reporting every detail of his personal life to these two idiots.

"No, you and Nes just talked for a long time yesterday," Azriel shrugged. "I thought you might have melted her heart with your jokes and skilled hands."

"Funny," Cassian rolled his eyes. "Nesta said yesterday that if I didn't fix her car within an hour, she'd stab me with a screwdriver. No clarification as to where."

"Elite flirting, no doubt," Rhysand muttered, still looking at his phone.

Azriel sighed, realizing he wouldn't get any ideas from them for the date until he spelled it out. Cassian led them into yet another store full of decorative knick-knacks, looking at every item on the shelves with admiration. Rhysand stepped out of the store, answering a phone call and sounding very irritated. Azriel stood there thinking he might ask Rhysand for an advance and take Eris to a decent place.

However, the concept of a decent place was vague. Just a good restaurant? Kind of, but after the car show, it felt lame. A movie? They weren't teenagers. A walk in the park? Absolutely, definitely, ironclad no, no, and no. And for the rest of the ideas, his imagination was too poor.

"Why are you zoning out?" Cassian asked, giving him a flick on the forehead. Azriel frowned and kicked him back in retaliation.

"Didn't get enough sleep," Azriel grumbled, adjusting the collar of his turtleneck.

They went through a few more stores, where Cassian first asked for their and Rhysand's opinions and then picked the opposite item, grumbling that they had no taste.

"How's Feyre?" Azriel asked Rhysand when they were both waiting for Cassian to pay at the register.

"Great," Rhysand smiled. "Today we're going to an art museum exhibition she really wanted to see."

"Oh," Azriel replied, making a mental note.

Maybe he was clueless about art, but Eris should love that; it was quite in line with rich guys like him. Paintings that made no sense, museum exhibitions, all that. Although they had agreed to have the date more in "his style," Azriel didn't want to disappoint Eris with that very style.

"You're surprisingly interested in our personal lives today," Rhysand noted, looking thoughtful.

"You're surprisingly attentive for someone who spends ninety percent of the time on the phone," Azriel retorted with a shrug. Rhysand just snorted, demonstratively putting his phone in his jacket's inner pocket.

"You texted him, right?"

"Sort of," Azriel nodded weakly. "And we kind of agreed on a second date. I agreed. It's kind of like an apologetic date, so the bar is set high, and given how wealthy he is, that bar rises to the height of the Empire State Building."

"I'm sure you'll handle it," Rhysand shrugged, clearly not planning to offer him an easy solution. He could have. He must have had tons of ideas, probably with plans for dates for the next ten years.

"You've been a huge help," Azriel said sarcastically.

"Am I dating this guy or you?"

"I kind of asked for advice."

"What's the topic?" Cassian interrupted, dragging a bag with a newly purchased music box.

"Azriel's going on a second date," Rhysand immediately answered.

"Seriously? And you kept quiet all this time?!" Cassian exclaimed, almost offended. Azriel rolled his eyes. "Where are you going this time? Please tell me it's a helicopter ride over the city."

Azriel stared at him for a long time; Rhysand pulled out his phone and started jotting something down.

"I asked him on a date," Azriel said, greatly disappointing Cassian. "So I'm in charge of organizing and choosing the place. Open to any suggestions."

He was met with silence and two sympathetic looks. Well, great. Azriel just sighed and shook his head, realizing he wouldn't find good advice here.

Later that evening, he spent long hours on the internet, trying to figure out where to take someone on a date that wouldn't resemble a clichéd rom-com, wasn't lame, and was financially feasible. His only luck was that he had invited Eris on a date for Friday, meaning he had almost a week to organize everything.

On Sunday evening, he realized he was screwed.

On Monday at noon, Lucien burst into Eris’s office, this time with coffee and a paper bag full of pastries, clearly wanting to appease him to find out more details. Eris could have been annoyed if he hadn’t been the one who taught Lucien this trick in the first place.

“Spill,” Lucien demanded, settling into his seat after leaving the coffee and what turned out to be a croissant on his desk. Eris gave him a look before rolling his eyes.

“I’m working, Lucien,” he grumbled, setting aside the motion to dismiss the witnesses. “Don’t you have any classes today? Shifts at the bar?”

“You did something with him!” Lucien beamed, too perceptive. Eris regretted ever giving his brother free access here. This conversation was going to give him a headache. “You’re not even denying it. Damn, Eris, tell me you slept together.”

“First of all, gross, why are we even discussing my personal life this way?” Eris complained, wrinkling his nose. “Second, don’t you have anything better to do? You know, they needed an assistant in the office downstairs…”

“Don’t change the subject. Yes or no?”

“Yes, happy?” Eris rolled his eyes. “Now, for the love of God and my nervous system, stop asking such blunt questions.”

“And now you’re dating,” Lucien said with such gleeful eyes that Eris was ready to open the window and throw his younger brother out of it. “Or is he in radio silence again?”

Eris rolled his eyes and shook his head. Azriel was not, in fact, in radio silence as he had been before. For example, yesterday, they had called each other because Azriel wanted to let him know he had no idea where to take him, thanks for the honesty, and decided to ask about his preferences. Eris spent an extra twenty minutes explaining that he really meant he wanted to get to know Azriel better and for him to choose a place to his liking. Azriel said he’d regret it and hung up.

“We’re not dating,” Eris clarified, so his younger brother wouldn’t get any dumb ideas. Considering that he loved to report any gossip to his girlfriend, and his girlfriend turned out to be Azriel’s friend, this was extremely dangerous.

“For now,” Lucien smirked, as satisfied as a cat full of cream. Eris couldn’t resist and threw a pencil at him, which he didn’t manage to dodge and yelped, rubbing his head.

“I don’t understand your good mood,” Eris grumbled, ignoring Lucien’s pout.

“You look happy,” Lucien declared honestly and straightforwardly. “Don’t throw things at me for telling the truth. Lately, you do seem happier, and I’m glad because, to be honest, your ex-wife was a bitch, and the last four years have made you even grumpier than usual. And you weren’t a ball of sunshine to begin with. So I’m really glad there’s someone in your life who makes you happy.”

Eris looked at him silently, wondering how obvious his mood was to those around him. Maybe only to Lucien, as he was one of the few people always hovering around him. But even so, he never thought he looked so unhappy in his marriage to Mor. Especially considering he was obligated to appear as a contented husband in the eyes of society. He also never thought he could look and be happy at the same time.

“That’s surprisingly sappy. Write that in your poetry collection,” he said sarcastically. Lucien just rolled his eyes, getting up from his seat.

“I know it’s easier for you to be a sarcastic jerk, but I also know you know I’m right,” he said. “And I have to get to class.”

“Off you go,” Eris waved him off.

Eris was left alone in the office and couldn’t focus on the motion to dismiss. Damn Lucien and his sappy romance. He looked happy? Like hell, he changed externally at all. He didn’t fear admitting that he enjoyed Azriel’s company, but they hadn’t known each other long and weren’t even dating to seriously consider such a heavy concept as “happiness.”

Running a hand through his tousled hair, Eris sighed. This week, he had the first hearing for his divorce. They postponed it for the third time because, three times, they both hoped one of them would give in and simply concede. Considering they were only dividing Eris’s money, he’d concede in hell, but never here.

Eris still didn’t understand why Mor suddenly needed money so badly. Maybe she had a bad habit of going to the casino like her father, who, according to information from Eris’s reliable sources, had debts as before their marriage and still afterward. Apparently, even Beron’s connections couldn’t help him. Not that Eris cared.

Or maybe it was because Mor had some other addiction. He wouldn’t be surprised if her gatherings with the brainless trophy wives obsessed with matcha and Pilates ended in cocaine. However, perhaps these assumptions were made by his hatred for her rather than cold reason.

And yet, Mor recently openly showed him she wouldn’t hesitate to send that damned video to his clients, competitors, and maybe even family. And while he could, in theory, eliminate the competitors by having other levers of pressure on them, and as conservative as his client base was, they knew they wouldn’t find a better lawyer than him, his father might very well bury him alive. And he’d be damned for once admitting this to Mor.

He could blackmail her in return. Hire a private investigator, find all the necessary information, and threaten her on a grand scale. However, something very similar to sheer exhaustion inside him screamed to just give her this half of the resources, including the apartment and half the cars, and be rid of her as soon as possible. Eris could be the best lawyer in the country, but he wanted to involve innocent people in this divorce the least. And on sheer bluff, he likely wouldn’t get far, though he might take the risk.

On Wednesday, Eris went to the hearing. He was represented by one of the best lawyers in his firm, in whom he had great confidence. But even so, the trial stretched for an entire day, thanks to Mor's crocodile tears about how he humiliated her in the marriage and was often "on the verge of using physical force." Eris’s lawyer quickly refuted these accusations, but Eris felt it was just the beginning.

The court exhausted him horribly, so he didn’t immediately notice Azriel’s message on his phone when he got home.

“I finally figured out where we’re going,” he wrote. Eris, despite the huge lump of irritation and fatigue, smiled weakly.

“Dress code? I don’t want to end up in a suit for skydiving.”

“No parachutes.”

“But no suits either. Casual clothes, if you have those at all.”

“Oh no, my wardrobe and I are offended you think that.”

“I’ll pick you up at seven. Really, it’d be better if you dressed casually, pretty boy.”

Pretty boy. Eris stared at the screen for a long time, trying to process his emotions regarding this nickname, which definitely gave him vivid flashbacks from the night with Azriel when he called him that during the second round.

On Friday, Eris finished work at five, which surprised his subordinates, who were used to him working late and on weekends. He ignored their joking comments and surprised looks. Then, he was in great distress because, as it turned out, even in a closet the size of a large room, he didn't have many options for casual clothing.

It didn't mean he didn't have any, but the selection was slimmer than the choice of shirts and suits. He had more ties than anything considered casual.

After struggling with the selection, Eris found a light quarter button-up sweater and chose dark pants, hoping it would be considered casual, as he didn't have another option. After getting himself ready and applying cologne, Eris looked at the clock, noticing it was almost seven, so he headed to the parking lot, where a damn motorcycle awaited him instead of the expected Volvo.

"You look good," Azriel smirked, obviously pleased by Eris's surprise at the choice of transport.

"Are you seventeen?" Eris raised an eyebrow, eyeing the damn vehicle.

"I didn't want to drive you in a 'piece of junk I call a car,'" Azriel recalled Eris's own words. "It'll be fine, don't worry," he added reassuringly, tossing him a spare helmet.

Eris rolled his eyes and put on the helmet, forcing himself to push away intrusive thoughts about accidents and all possible unfortunate incidents.

"I'm not worrying," he grumbled, approaching the motorcycle. Azriel smirked at his reaction and got on first, with Eris sitting behind him, wrapping his arms around Azriel's waist. "You do realize you just gave me a good excuse to fondle you?"

"Who said I'm against it?" Azriel smirked. "Hold on tight."

Eris would have liked to say something sarcastic in response, but the roar of the motorcycle really made him tighten his grip on Azriel's waist. Considering Azriel's driving habits, Eris had every reason to fear for his life. Not that he'd ever admit it.

Azriel started the motorcycle, and they drove off the parking lot at a relatively slow speed before picking up speed and merging into traffic. Azriel had been riding motorcycles since he was fifteen, confident in his abilities like no one else, but he didn't drive at the speed he was used to racing through the night streets.

Was choosing a motorcycle his little revenge for Eris's comment about his car? Absolutely. Was it also a choice to impress? A definite yes, and he wasn't ashamed of it. Did he like how Eris pressed against him and gripped his body? Hell, yes.

Azriel skillfully avoided traffic jams, maneuvering between cars with years of honed experience. Fortunately for Eris, the ride didn't take long, and soon they arrived at their destination.

Getting off the motorcycle, Eris immediately took off his helmet and adjusted his clothes, grumbling about how he could have just borrowed a Ferrari again and saved himself the nerves. Azriel only chuckled at his grumbling, taking both helmets and leaving them right on the motorcycle hooks.

"Are you going to explain where you've brought me?" Eris asked, looking around. In front of him was only one place they could potentially go, and it was a bar with a neon, eye-piercing sign.

"You probably won't believe me, but it's better inside than it looks outside," Azriel smiled.

Eris tried not to show his skepticism about the place. He had asked Azriel not to stress about the choice of venue and to pick something close to his heart. If this was the place... well, he could endure one evening. Maybe it wasn't as bad inside as it looked due to the bright, sometimes burnt-out sign. Besides, he was here for Azriel, not the place.

They entered, and the place surprisingly looked civilized. Warm lighting, dark oak tables, and surprisingly comfortable ambiance. There was a small stage against the brick wall where local musicians took turns performing. Eris followed Azriel to a table that was reserved for them, located away from the others, in a corner, yet still close enough to the stage where a guitarist was currently performing.

"We can choose a place together next time," Azriel said.

"Next time?" Eris raised an eyebrow. "I am supposed to ignore you for a week after this date and only then consider a chance for a third date."

"I have certain persuasive methods," Azriel smirked.

Eris decided not to risk the menu and just agreed with whatever Azriel ordered. Ideally, he would have checked the kitchen first, but, as they say, ignorance is bliss. He didn't want to know about the establishment's sanitary level.

"How was your week?" Azriel asked, obviously trying to start some conversation. Eris didn't want to delve into the details of his divorce, as burdening someone with such problems on a second date was foolish.

So instead, he talked about work, idiots among people trying to hire him, and other details. After that, he let Azriel share something, and he began recounting some amusing incidents that happened in the workshop throughout the week.

When their food arrived, a band named Valkyries took the stage. Eris glanced with interest towards the stage, as did Azriel.

"Elain's sister?" Eris asked, looking at Nesta. Azriel nodded, deciding it was no surprise that Eris knew her. Since he had seen Elain, he should be familiar with Nesta. It was almost impossible to know Elain and never see her older sister. It was a good thing Cassian stayed on duty in the workshop today – he had a tradition of dropping by this bar every time the Valkyries performed, singing louder than anyone, "supporting" Nesta.

"She's less... intimidating when she's performing," Eris remarked, and Azriel couldn't help but laugh.

"I think the girls soften her," he said. His gaze fell on Gwyn, with whom he was good friends, and then on Emerie.

Azriel sipped his whiskey and glanced at Eris, who seemed to chew his fries cautiously while staring at the stage for quite a long time.

"Hey, should I start getting jealous?" Azriel joked, snapping Eris out of whatever thought maze he had gotten into.

"Sorry," he smiled apologetically, then looked back at the stage. "Do you know who the drummer is?"

"Emerie?" Azriel raised an eyebrow. "I'm not particularly well-acquainted with her. I just know she's a friend of Nesta and Gwyn."

Eris nodded and turned away from the stage. After the third glass of whiskey, he began to like the place. Well, he could admit there was some atmosphere here. Moreover, he and Azriel started to communicate well, laughing at something silly that Eris probably wouldn't laugh at under any other circumstances with anyone else.

Soon after the bottle was half-empty, or half-full, depending on how you look at it, Azriel grabbed it by the neck and stood up from his seat. Eris looked at him questioningly, but when Azriel extended his hand, he took it and stood up too.

"This isn't all," Azriel said, leading him to the other end of the bar. Eris thought about how he still hadn't let go of Azriel's hand and didn't particularly want to.

They reached a door marked "staff only," but Azriel opened it with ease, performing some maneuver with the doorknob before pulling Eris inside.

"Are you kidnapping me?" Eris asked, trying to see something in the darkness. "I'd prefer to be a victim than an accomplice. Less damaging to my career."

Azriel chuckled softly and closed the door behind them, muffling the loud sounds of the bar. With a click the room lit up, revealing a billiard table in the middle of a cozy room.

"A secret place," Azriel smiled with a certain pride and approached the player, turning on the music. "It's still a date; I didn't want to deprive us of privacy."

Eris approached the rack with billiard cues, picking one up. "You know how to play?" he asked.

"Yes," Azriel nodded as he put the bottle of whiskey on the counter. "Do you?"

Eris shrugged, approaching the billiard table. "I guess there's only one way to find out."

He gestured for Azriel to go ahead, watching from the sidelines as Azriel grabbed a cue and bent over the billiard table. Eris's eyes traveled over his body, and he wasn't at all ashamed. Hell, maybe he regretted that Azriel wore so many clothes right now.

A hit. The colored balls scattered across the billiard table, one immediately pocketing. Eris watched as Azriel's lips twisted into a proud smirk, thinking it was somewhat amusing.

After a few more successful shots, Azriel finally missed, and it was Eris's turn. Eris tightened his grip on the cue and aimed, striking the white ball and sending it toward the red one, which stopped just a few millimeters from the pocket.

"Almost," Azriel said in a somewhat encouraging tone. Eris snorted and straightened up.

"Almost," he nodded, stepping aside to give Azriel space to take his shot. And he pocketed the unfortunate red ball into his pocket. "Consider that I let you get this one," Eris joked.

"You don't know how to lose, do you?" Azriel smirked teasingly.

Eris rolled his eyes, waiting for his turn. This time, he pocketed exactly one ball, but Azriel only clicked his tongue, as if dissatisfied that Eris missed right after. A bit more time passed before his irritation apparently reached its limit.

"I can't understand how someone with such an elegant stance can play so terribly," Azriel grumbled. Eris laughed because he called his stance 'elegant.' "Are you sure you know how to play?"

"I am out of practice," Eris shrugged, about to make his move, but Azriel caught his wrist holding the cue.

"Relax your wrist," Azriel said firmly, and damn, that tone, both commanding and soft... Eris didn't immediately understand what he said, but soon he relaxed his wrist. "When you hold the cue, don't tense your hand so much."

"Oh, are you my billiards teacher now?" Eris smirked when Azriel stood behind him, and, okay, he didn't mind at all when Azriel grabbed his hips to adjust his stance.

"Yes, the first lesson is free, but after that, my rate is high," Azriel whispered in his ear, provoking chills in Eris. "Bend over," he said.

Eris bent over the billiards table, and if he had any willpower left before, now his brains were slowly but surely turning to mush. Azriel gave some instructions, but more than half of the words flew past his ears, and Azriel had to correct Eris himself.

A hand on his elbow, another hand on his hip, a firm chest pressed against his back. All of this combined with Azriel's voice giving commands did everything possible so that Eris could think of anything other than hitting the right ball with the cue.

"Come on, hit it," Azriel whispered, biting his earlobe. Eris didn't know if he wanted to kill him or kiss him for that.

Instead of striking himself, he waited for Azriel to move his hand and hit, guiding his body in the right way. Then again. And again. Each time whispering some praise. And no matter how many times he missed or how much he had to bend over to reach the right ball, Azriel was unwilling to break contact between their bodies. The only time he did so was when they were about to play a second round and needed to reset the balls.

"Looks like I'm not the only one who can't focus on the game," Eris teased, feeling Azriel's erection as he pressed his hips against his.

"Sink at least one ball on your own, and I promise to do something about it," Azriel laughed, pressing him harder against the billiards table. And then he stepped back. Damn.

Eris just shrugged at that promise and adjusted his grip on the cue to be as comfortable as possible, leaning forward and keeping his back straight. A second or two, and he hit the ball, which sent one ball into a pocket, and then, bouncing off the table wall, sent a second ball straight into the pocket. Eris then took another shot, with the white ball bouncing off the walls twice before sinking another ball into a pocket. In less than two minutes, all the balls disappeared from the table.

Straightening up, he smirked at Azriel, who was openly staring at him in shock.

"Would you believe me if I say it’s only because of your amazing teaching skills?" Eris grinned, but instead of replying, Azriel simply pulled him by the sweater collar and kissed him, pressing him against the billiards table. "I am holding you to your promise,” Eris murmured into his lips before returning the kiss.

tag list: @sizzlingstarlightsky @isnotwhatyourethinking @molcat07 @chairofchaos

[tuliptic]

Wonderland: On My My Way

To put it simply, pick an Ateez logo and let's see which phase of life you're in right now, are you on your way to where you wanna be. The entire motif behind is me wanting to use Ateez’s song titles as inspiration for my readings, as how they’ve inspired me to be better. So yeah, here’s something (again).

Close your eyes, meditate on this topic and ask yourself the question: “Where am I? Am I on my way to where I wanna be?” Breathe in and out, make sure your mind and heart is calm. Then, open your eyes to see which pile talks to you the most/draws you in the most. Once you’ve found your pile, scroll down to the respective parts to see what are the messages for you.

Piles go from left to right

Disclaimer: This is solely for my entertainment purposes. Take only whatever that you feel like it. If it doesn’t resonate, it’s okay to just drop it. That aside, I do not consent to my work or here to be used by third parties on this platform or other websites.

Decks used: Luna Cat Tarot Deck (Major Arcana), Linestrider Tarot Deck, Sweet Dreams Oracle Deck, Starcodes Astro Oracle Deck, self made lyrics deck.

Pile 1

Overall theme of querent: The Sun

First thing I’m picking up on is that you like bright things? Things that shine, glimmer, bright colours? Maybe not so bright colours but something that’s pretty striking? It’s like you like to stand out? Weirdly I’m picking up on fire (Leo) energy as well. Like, you’re known to be the light of the party, someone who’s always making the office lively, making other people laugh (not in the class clown way). If you aren’t, then it is someone that you’ve wanted to be. It’s just an adorably optimistic energy I’m picking up and making me smile here.

1. Where am I now? Queen of Cups

You're getting more and more in tune with yourself, allowing yourself to take time to meditate and heal yourself from your past traumas. Some of you may be on different stages, but you all know about the importance of healing and have taken action towards it. You’re slowly nurturing yourself. I’m also seeing some that may be healing through artistic means? Drawing? Colouring? You open yourself to inspiration and watch creativity flow through you. It’s a very warm, welcoming and flowy energy here, allowing yourself to adapt to whatever situations life throws at you.

2. Where do I wanna go? Queen of Pentacles

You want to be someone practical yet has a nurturing energy. Not so much of a femme fatale kinda energy, more like a teacher? Or a career counsellor kinda vibe? Where you use whatever you’ve learnt to help the future generation or anyone under you who wants to learn. You also want to achieve financial independence, so that you can help others the way others have helped you. I’m seeing you’ve received help before and hence, there’s this nurturing energy that’s heavy where you return the favour.

3. What should I prepare for this journey? Temperance

You need to learn the importance of balance. To achieve where you want to go, you need to balance your efforts and energy. Rest when you need to rest, move when you need to move. A journey is long, and you need time to let your car and yourself rest, add gas to your car before you embark on a long journey. Gain back the balance that you’ve once lost, or you’ve thought you’ve never needed. Cuz you’ll be needing that balance back.

I’m mainly seeing the balance of what you want and what you can. For example, you want to achieve level 5, but your current best is level 3. You can’t just burn yourself out to achieve level 5 with what you have. You can only accept whatever that’s happening, take your time to build yourself up to level 5 and get that. The balance between your physical wants and your mental wants, the balance between rest and work. You need some form of work-life balance back into your life. Clarify whatever you need to, make a list, see which aspect of life you’re lacking on and work on that.

4. How should I go on my way? Page of Cups

There will be creative opportunities coming your way. Let your curiosity lead you around and about. The Universe is dropping messages, opportunities, and help along your way. It’s up to you to catch them and to work towards it. Your curiosity will become your greatest asset. Use it wisely, make sure to let them guide you. If you have no dreams right now, time to write them down and work towards them. Once you’ve set your mind to do something, the Universe will help you out on your way. Think of yourself as the Universe’s beloved, let things fall in place for you. Things may be difficult right now, but there’s always a tomorrow that brings hope for you. You will not feel you’re alone, and you’ll not let anyone feel like they’re alone.

Overall energy: The Moon, The Fool rx

There’s The Sun earlier, and we have The Moon here. There’s a lot of unknown and uncertainty here. You’ve been charging ahead without thinking much earlier. You’ve realised what you’ve been doing was reckless, and now you gotta realign yourself. Know that you’ll need a lot of structure back in your life, and let your dreams give you inspiration and guidance. This pile may have prominent Saturn or is Saturn dominant (the nurturing yet practical energy).

.

..

...

Pile 2

Overall theme of querent: Chariot rx

I have a feeling that life is speeding way too fast for you that you’re now having a hard time to juggle and to gain back the control. And what happens when you lose control? You crash, you get lost. So this is your current state, where you’re trying to pick yourself up and trying to find your way back on your track of life.

1. Where am I now? Knight of Wands

You're somewhere, and you’re on the way. “Where’re we going, no one knows it, we're just going, right? For glory, for victory, we can fight all night.” speaks about you right now. Yes I quoted Ateez again but it makes sense okay, since Knight of Wands talks about action, and you’re in the middle of a journey. I feel that you’re in the middle of a search, and once you’ve found your direction, you’ll charge towards it with strength and faith. You’re working with your dreams and spirit’s energy to reach your highest good, and the journey of searching for it seems fun.

2. Where do I wanna go? Page of Swords rx

You probably have some stubborn personalities in you, where you wanna walk on the road of self expression. I don’t think you have a fixed path, but you do have short goals in life. It’s like… You don’t set a goal like “I wanna be a CEO” kinda goal, but something more like “In five years I wanna reach managerial position, and then in ten years I wanna have my own house.” kinda thing. It’s more visualised, something that can be seen and measurable. You’re also someone who’s driven by your visions. So to have something like a short term goal would be helpful for you to reach where you wanted to go. 

3. What should I prepare for this journey? Two of Swords

I’m getting the feeling that knowledge is needed. Not the book kinda knowledge, but knowledge you learn from being an adult, something that will not be taught in schools. It’s like… Learning how to recognise the needs of other people and answering to them, learning how to catch up on other people’s boundaries, learning how to read facial expressions. These will be the one of the two swords you’ll be wielding.

The other sword you’ll be wielding is the interpersonal relationships you’ve built on the way. The people you can trust, the people you can rely on, the people you can confide in. The reason is cuz there will be times that your eyes will be covered by the various promises life can give, but it all may be an illusion, and you’ll be needing these two swords to cut through the mist and to proceed in life. These are the abundance you’ll be bringing with you for this journey.

4. How should I go on my way? Three of Wands rx

First and foremost, you must remember you’re not alone on your journey. You need to stop playing small, start planning out your journey, plan for unexpected delays and what else can you do along the way. There may be side quests around you for you to complete, so do them. You might find some unexpected items that can help you level up or to help you out in your journey. Be aware of whatever that’s happening around you. Do remember to move forward, but don’t forget to enjoy the companionship and sceneries of the journey. Be at peace with yourself, create the peace you’ve wanted. You want something, then reach out to it and get them with your hands. Make your journey a pleasant one, follow your bliss and accept limitless joy.

Overall energy: Judgement, Queen of Swords rx

Overall speaking, I feel that you’ve been pretty harsh with yourself and have been judging yourself from your lack of success. See, you have not failed, you have not fallen. But you see lack of success as failure, which will mess your head up a bit cuz you’ll feel like you’re a disappointment when you’re not. You’re called to nurture yourself first, only then focus on the authoritative side of you and of your career. I’m seeing some of you may have 10H stellium as well, or heavy earth energy. This ended up very career-ish so Cap energy as well.

.

..

...

Pile 3

Overall theme of querent: The Hierophant

First thing I’m seeing here is that you’re someone who fights for tradition. Not just uphold, but fight. You have a hard time accepting new things and rather do things in an old fashioned way, in the safest way possible. You rarely take risks unless the success rate is over 95%. Don’t ask me how I came up with that number.

1. Where am I now? Ten of Wands rx

You’re in a stage where you’ve been holding a lot of responsibilities on your shoulders. I’m seeing that you’ve gotten them on you because of a lack of trust? Like you have a problem trusting people to do things your required way, so you took everything up on you and take that extra burden on you. Know that you are capable, but you’re also capable of trusting others, to release and let you team members do the other work. Create your own peace by letting go of what needs to let go.

2. Where do I wanna go? Page of Pentacles

I’m seeing that you want to get better and better with whatever you’re doing, to attain skill development. This may be because you wanna catch whatever financial opportunities that come your way. There’s some sort of ambitious energy I’m also feeling here, where you may have focused too much of your energy in taking up tasks to make yourself better. You’ll want to work with your dreams and your spirit’s energy to reach your highest good, and you want to enjoy your journey in attaining financial independence as well as its opportunities.

3. What should I prepare for this journey? Knight of Pentacles

Hard work and practicality came to me first. You’ll need to put in the effort to improve in the various skills you’ve wanted to develop. But you’ll need to remain practical as well. You can develop the skills you want, but you also need to develop the skills you need. Be practical and balanced. Put yourself through the routine of learning, of practising. Get to know people, talk to them, learn about them. This may sound difficult for some of you as you may not be used to talking to people, listening to them even. But you’re called to do so as you need to learn how to create strong emotional connections with the people in your life, especially the important people.

I’m also seeing that you’ll need to prepare for a loooong journey. It’s gonna be a battle of stamina. You’ll be needing to build yourself up before you can head out, be prepared with your wisdom, with your faith, with whatever connections that you’ve made. Weirdly, the words “to gain something, you’ll need to lose something first” came into my mind. You need to lose the feeling of shame when you change from what you’ve done to something else. Sometimes, you know that being stubborn doesn’t help. But you fear the looks of other people, fear how they’ll sneer at you. Thing is, you won’t get things done if you fear that much. So yeah, lose that sense of shame and gain the success of the things you’re doing. I hope I’m making sense here.

4. How should I go on my way? Eight of Swords

Stop playing the victim, let go of those negative thoughts, let go of those self-imposed restrictions. There’s this ego that you’re holding and you need to open up your eyes to see them before everybody leaves you. You’re called to do some critical thinking and to do some introspection and act on them accordingly. 

The energy here is very sharp. Usually people around will help to lead the blind, but people won’t want to help people who are trapping themselves, who don’t wanna leave the prison of swords they’ve built. There’s only so much others can help. It may seem like a painful journey but one day, when you look back, you’ll see how far you’ve journeyed. 

Overall energy: Judgement, Ten of Swords

You’re going through some sort of judgement? I’m seeing this comes from outside and there’s some fear in you. As much as you wanna emphasise on loving yourself, that you’re on the right path, you still feel the stabbing pain from the swords that are on you. There’s this painful journey that you’re going through right now, but know that it’s to tell you that the end is here and there will be a new cycle where you can start things anew. Something may be amiss this time, and you can learn about it and to not repeat the same mistakes in the new cycle. 

[greensagephase]

Hi Alondra!! Thank you for replying back to me on the New Year's fanart!! there's really no pressure replying and I truly appreciate every response 🥹❤️ hearing that you still love the New Year's fanart makes me so happy!! (I promise there is more fanart for NC in the near future!!) I’m glad you took some time off social media for your mental health because that’s very important!! I’ve been quite busy lately too so I’ve been off social media more than usual this past week. I’m also happy that you’ve been sticking to drawing daily for 30 minutes!, and even if you miss a day here and there it’s still great! There are days where I just don’t have the energy to draw, so if you need to take breaks from that too it’s okay! But I really do get excited hearing these updates! Also, omg I’m very happy that you drew Miguel in a way that you liked and you’re feeling more comfortable and confident with drawing!!! Hearing that makes me so excited and i’m rooting for you!!! ❤️

Also, I just have to mention again that I’m really happy you took a little break from social media and writing, sometimes it can be too much and the last thing I’d want is for you to be burnt out from everything! (and I'm happy my little words of encouragement helped you decide to take some days off, I want to make sure you're doing okay too 🥺) you really do so much on here and you deserve the rest! ❤️❤️ Thank you so much for all the support and words of encouragement with my schooling!! (and when you mentioned getting another degree in the future- I might actually consider it!! maybe even study in a subject more for fun!) I’ve been very busy with everything and preparing for the first presentation of my capstone this Monday (the nerves are there but I'll maybe update you on how that goes! 😭) but one thing’s for sure- I still love to take the time to go on here and talk to you when I can!! And I’m so excited to read the next part when it comes out!! (please don’t stress about when you’re going to post it though 🥺) And I also promise that I read all your responses too, often times more than once because they make my day!! They mean so much to me and you don’t have to worry about replying late or anything, I understand! the weather where I live has also been arctic, haha!! (no fr today when I went out I was still shivering with all my layers 😭) and if it's also still cold where you are stay safe and warm too!! I hope you’re doing well and that you’re having an amazing week Alondra!! sending you a warm virtual hug, friend!!! ❤️✨❤️

Here are some little sketches of encouragement with your writing and everything!! a soft smiling Miguel and ok I imagine the 2nd one Miguel is giving look of like he’s proud of you 🥺 but also, he just has that signature smirk too 🤭

@sunsetdoodler thank you for being so understanding and of course, I love talking with you, so I've been trying to reply to everything!! I just got really behind on my responses 😭 but yes, I LOVE the New Year's fanart!!!

Still thinking about it and how cute your OC and Miguel look together, I can't wait to see them again (and omg, more fanart!!! I can't wait to see it but of course, take your time!!!)!! And you being off social media is so understandable with your school!! I hope everything is going well so far!! I'm thinking about you and sending you the best of luck, and hoping everything goes smoothly for you as always!!!! ❤️ Also, thank you for the well wishes on my drawing journey!! I took off yesterday and today because I've been busy doing other things but I'll hopefully be back to it tomorrow, thank you, really!! And yes omg, I've been studying Miguel (I've been studying your fanart and other lovely artists' fanart plus using the amazing drawing references I've seen on here; that's actually how I finally got his hair down haha), and feel like I'm moving forward in drawing him, but it's a working process! 😂

And thank you, omg!!!!! 🥺🥺 I was debating taking a break because I always feel so guilty disappearing from social media even if it's just a day or two, but your words of encouragement to take it easy helped and I decided to do it. I tend to feel a little off after the holidays and just feel overwhelmed by everything, so this little break really helped my mental health, and honestly - it helped my writing! I was lowkey forcing myself to write prior to it, but all is well now, and I feel great now. I've done so much more writing in two days than I did over the span of several days prior to my break, so yay!! About your schooling - of course!!!!! I'm wishing you the best and rooting for you!!! As I said already, I'm always hoping and wishing that everything goes smoothly for you!!! I hope you're taking care of yourself and that these first two weeks have been kind to you so far!!! You should def consider earning another degree for fun if you're interested!! I'd love to hear what you'd like to do if you were to get another one (if you're open to sharing, if not, I understand, so no pressure!!)!! Omg, your first capstone presentation is this Monday!! I'm sending you, and will continue to send you, all the best of luck!!! I know you got this and it'll go great!!!!!! 🥺✨ It'll be one presentation down, and hopefully it will get easier as the semester goes!!!! And thank you for taking time out of your day to come on here and talk to me, it truly means so much to me!!! Please know that I understand life gets crazy, so I totally understand if you can't reply right away or not at all (don't feel pressured to, friend!! I get it!!)!! And I'm happy that my words make your day, yours make my day as well!! I always look forward to reading your responses/asks!!!❤️ And omg @sunsetdoodler I hope you're staying warm and cozy, too!! It has been very cold this week for us (there was even a busted pipe this morning because of how cold it has been this whole week). I hope you stay warm and be safe if you're out on the road driving!!! I hope you're having a fantastic week, too and that you have a great weekend!! Hopefully you get to do some fun cozy things and relax a bit despite your presentation!!! Sending you the warmest virtual hug and the best wishes as always, friend!!!! ❤️✨❤️

And OMG THE SKETCHES!!!! Miguel saying "you got this!" - that's so ENCOURAGING!!! 🥺 And his proud face in the second sketch - stop, now I'm going to imagine that Miguel cheers me on when I write and try to draw him and the second sketch is him watching me while I do my thing,😭😭 THANK YOU, FRIEND!!!! These sketches are so freaking CUTE!!!!! And his signature smirk - everything this man does gets me, I swear!!!! 🤭 (I'd get so distracted if I saw him like this actually) I'm going to have these sketches pulled up whenever I write or draw, for real!!! THANK YOU!!!! ❤️✨🥺

[lfghughes]

Heaven Can’t Help Me Now | Alt Finale

a/n: to all my jamie peeps I hope this helps you forgive me for the Trevor ending. If not I’m so sorry

It felt like the internet exploded overnight while you were trying to sleep. Trying was the key word because your brain was in overdrive over Jamie. When you did check your phone this morning you saw Trevor had quite an eventful night, plenty of videos circulating the internet with him and some girls. Surprisingly it didn’t sting the way you thought it would and that’s when it hit you. 

Trevor was fun, you enjoyed the week you had and it was a nice break from reality but in the long run you weren’t sure if you were actually that compatible. Jamie was the person who you could talk to about any of your problems, the person you liked curling up next to on the couch at the end of a long day. He gave you comfort when you needed it the most. You weren’t just upset about hurting Jamies feelings last night, you were upset about potentially losing him. But he did request for space and you were going to do that.

*few months later*

Time is exactly what Jamie got. For the first few weeks after that explosive night, you two barely saw each other. Once Trevor came back from vacation you started seeing them a little more although it still felt awkward especially with the three of you. But slowly things started falling into place again and after a couple of months you finally felt like you were in a good place with Jamie again.

After everything that happened when Trevor came back you both got to talk and it was clear where you stood with Jamie and your feelings for him. Still you wanted to respect the space Jamie needed so instead you and Trevor used this time to come up with a plan on how to tell Jamie how you felt. “Okay, so our first game is tomorrow and I think you should do it during warm ups because if it goes well we might just have the best game of our lives.”

Your eyes widened at Trevors words “Wait do you think this can go bad?” Now you were suddenly anxious about all the things that could go wrong. “Everything can go bad but we’re preparing for the best.” You nodded your head slowly at his words, nope you weren’t going to get in your head about this. “Okay, so I have my sign done.” You told him and he nodded his head as if he was checking that off his mental checklist. “I’ll take care of music, trust me I’ll set the mood.” Now you were more worried because what in the world did Trevor pick for a song and why was he going so above and beyond for this.

You were nervous all throughout the night and even more the next day. But all of that washed away once you were in the arena, maybe it had something to do with the cool air or just you listening to Trevors words about preparing for the best case scenario. At warm ups you try your best to stay slightly hidden not that it would be that weird for you to be there to begin with. As all the boys came out, you saw Trevor look over at you and give you a small nod as he skated to the bench. You watched him as he spoke to someone who was behind the bench and when they disappeared you knew Trevor was putting the plan into action.

A laugh spilled from your lips as Trevors song choice came on and you knew it was his song choice because it was Wildest Dreams by Taylor Swift. Definitely how he viewed romance. You held up your sign that clearly stated to Jamie that you loved him and you watched as Trevor tapped him and pointed him over to you. You could see it all falling into place. Jamie taking in that the song choice wasn’t random and realizing what your sign was saying. 

His cheeks turned red as a smile grew on his lips and he took his helmet off as he skated off the ice. Before you knew it he had found you. “You’re such a sap you know?” He teased you, using the words you had used on him the night at his house when he did the set up outside. “Takes one to know one huh?” You teased him right back. A smile grew on his lips as he leaned down to kiss you and both of you laughed when you heard a cheer coming from the ice, definitely Trevor getting the whole team to cheer. “After this game I’m definitely getting you a jersey with my name on it. Make sure everyone knows you’re my girlfriend.”

[lexiklecksi]

Monster

Genre: horror, pov: first person, word count: 1419, trigger warnings: monster, suicidal ideation, mental illness, paranoia, car crash

Months ago, I wrote the first few sentences of this horror short story and saved it in my notes. Today, I finished writing it. I hope you like this change of genre and give it a read!

Lights are blinding me. I flinch, holding a hand out against the white light coming closer. An engine breaks through the silence of the night. I squint and suddenly there's a car moving towards me at high speed. I stumble to the side, my heart racing. How did I end up here? In the middle of a crossroad. My fingers ache, so I flex them, slowly gazing down while my sight is still flickering from the headlights. Something warm trickles down my hand, it oozes onto the grass where I'm crouching. What is this? A realization hits me: It's blood, and it's not mine. What happened? My head hurts. The texture of the grass beneath me feels soothing. I want to lie down and never get up again. My back hurts like a thousand needles are pricking it. I roll onto my side and let out a heavy sigh. The air is freezing, my breath turns cold. Everything hurts. Oh please make it stop.

A high-pitched scream pierces the air and I cover my ears, but it only makes it louder. Am I screaming? Something flickers behind my eyes, my vision blurs and then I suddenly see it. The monster. It stared at me with overbearing eyes, saliva dripping down its chin, the hairy forearms and a breath that tastes like death. I thought I escaped, isn't that why I'm on the road? How could it find me? Wherever I go, it always follows me. You can run, but you cannot hide. A deafening scream escapes my sore throat. This time, I know it's me. A cry for help, but no one will hear it. This road is deserted in the middle of the night. Achingly, I try to stand up again. My legs turned into jelly, I fall down on my knees. Everything hurts. Worst of all, my head hurts. My head always hurts, but something feels different. Thoughts are chasing each other by the tail, but I can't grab any of them. My mind remains a blank slate, preparing itself to be eaten by the monster. Despite the brain fog, a thought emerges. A command: Run! Run! Run!

On all fours, I'm crawling towards the street. Pain shoots like an arrow to my knees, but I force my legs to stand up again. The monster is lurking in the dark, chuckling at my desperate attempts to save myself. Am I even worth saving? She told me I was beyond saving. Before it all went wrong, she tried. I'm thankful she tried, even though I don't deserve such kindness. She said, I don't hate you, I just want to save you while there's still something left to save. We compared scars. She said, I'll show you mine if you show me yours first. My body is a haunted house, only a few would dare to visit it. I can cry about the sorry remains of myself another time. Now I need to focus on saving myself. Though, it would be so much easier to give in, to accept my fate of being eaten by a monster. What's there to live for anyway? Since she left, I have been lying in my bed like it's a deathbed. My feet are still running down the road. Where am I going? There is no escape from the monster. It's roaring laughter keeps haunting me, trailing behind the line of blood drops I'm leaving on the road. So much blood. Bloody hell, I am such a loser. When they finally found my mangled body on the road, there will be no way to recognize me. There is no one left to recognize me anyway. And I would spare her the look of my fucked up body. Of my remains they scraped from the road and put on a steel table under a harsh white light. I can picture it so well as if I'm already dead.

Am I dead yet? Is this nightmare ever going to end? I haven't slept in weeks. Once upon a time, the night was my friend. It welcomed me into its warm embrace after an exhausting day. I didn't feel lonely, even though I was alone. I didn't question the natural order of life back then. That was before she came into my life. She taught me that my life was lonely and she was the missing puzzle piece to my happiness. Then she left me in pieces, shattered glass on the ground, drops of blood smeared on the mirror. How can anyone be so cruel to love me? What a sick joke love is. Everyone wants to be loved, right? I'd rather have people hate me, it's less cruel for my broken heart. Tree after tree passes me as I stumble down the road, the monster slowly walking behind me. It is taking its time because it knows it will catch me. Like a cat with a mouse, it's playing with me. Giving me just enough hope to keep on going. Even though we both know how this will end. There is no chance I make it out alive. I won't see another sunrise. How sad that I didn't appreciate the last sunrise.

A distant memory of sunshine on my scarred skin. A warm embrace on a cold day. I'm shivering as it starts raining. The hairy monster shakes the rain off its fur. It smiles at me, like a friend. I know better than to trust that smile. Friends become enemies very quickly. They cared for me, a long time ago. They stopped visiting me in the hospital a few weeks after … the incident. Not only that, but they couldn't understand that I'm still sick. That there is no cure for this kind of disease. It's eating my brain inside out. It's tearing at my flesh and no matter what the doctors tried, they couldn't help. The only visitor that kept coming was the monster. Somehow it managed to get past hospital security. Somehow it was invisible to others. All that doesn't matter. It's real, it's here and it is still going to feast on me. Blinded by the lights. A honk, screeching tires, then the road falls on my face. Darkness engulfs me.

Muffled voices near my ear, a hand checking for a pulse on my slit wrist. “Oh shit, oh shit! Is he okay?” Then a deeper voice shouts: “Darling, call an ambulance! He lost a lot of blood!” Footsteps approaching. “Shit, I didn't see him! Why was he walking on the road at midnight?” Yes indeed, why? The monster! How could I forget about the monster! I open my mouth, but just a gurgling sound escapes. “He's trying to speak! Move closer!”, the deep voice commands. “The monster … look out … can't escape … it will eat us all”, I manage to mumble under my breath. “Honey, what is he talking about? There is no monster, is it? The road is empty!”, she says, confused. Idiots! We are all going to die. More food for the monster, that must make it happy. At least one of us will be happy. I will never be happy again. Sirens in the distance. “Oh, thank God, the ambulance is coming!”, he shouts out, relieved. “Please just leave me to die here”, I whisper into the darkness.

A hand holds mine. “No, stay with me, buddy. You will live. The ambulance is nearly here. Don't give up yet! You will live, I promise!”, he speaks softly yet eagerly in my ear. Tears are running down my face. “I want to die”, I whisper in the direction of the voice. “You won't die tonight”, he reassures me. Then four strong arms lift me up. “His pulse is steady, but he lost a lot of blood. Give me some bandages! And open his vein for me, I need to inject”, one says to the other. The monster smiles his devilish smile and waves me goodbye. “Please don't leave me”, I cry out. “I'm right here”, says someone. “Stay with me”, someone begs me. It sounds just like her … impossible, it can't be her! She was taken by the monster a month ago. “He's got a hospital bracelet!”, someone shouts. “Great, where are we taking him?” Someone grabs my wrist. “It says: Mental Ayslum Georgetown.” A cough of disbelief. “Didn't that close down years ago?” Hands are grabbing my body, rearranging it. “Let's just drive him to the nearest hospital then.” Lights are blinding me, then darkness engulfs me.

Tag list: Never miss a poem or a short story I write! Comment + if you want to be added or - to be removed from my tag list. @matcha-chai @dg-fragments @silversynthesis @heartofmuse @scatteredthoughts2 @rhapsodyinblue80 @alaskaisnothere @stoic-words @september-stardust @wordsforsadpeeps @writingitdown @intothevortex @aubriestar @warriorbookworm @raevenlywrites @alex-a-roman @artsymagee @giantrobocock @theheightofdepression @writing-is-a-martial-art @beautifulimposter25 @callmepippin @a-musingmichelle @kirkshiresloss @rhythmiccreatorofbeuty @eos109 @azriel-alexander-holmes @tini-rat @captain-kraken