#it makes me sad that so much of the community seems to consider it the Ultimate Canon bc it.. just throws every other perspective away

[fluxedbuds]

Evidence against the Hermatrix

I don’t like it

[no27-autonation-honda]

okay my one bitchy little personal post about the mess. Jesus fucking Christ why do I have to be in graduate school at the most annoying possible time.

[nothorses]

You've made a lot of really great posts about transmasc experiences and struggles, and they really resonate with me! So I guess I want to in complete earnest ask: why the push for 'transandrophobia' when anti-transmasculinity as a term has been around for longer and faces little friction by comparison? I don't really *dislike* transandrophobia, but its meaning gets muddied everywhere from different directions, while ATM is pretty direct and succinct I feel. It's very clear that it's about TRANSmasculine oppression. I'm not against having a dedicated term at all, but the content of our struggles gets lost in the weeds of attaching kind of understandably divisive terms like misandry and androphobia in an attempt to mirror a phenomenon very specifically about misogyny; it seems more trouble than it's worth considering ATM is right there

I'll be honest, this ask is confusing to me for a few reasons.

When I started talking about transandrophobia around the summer of 2020, the conversations I was encountering were very much, like, a handful of people across Twitter and Tumblr (literally, a handfull!). I picked up "transandrophobia" because it was one of two words I saw in use, and the other- "transmisandry"- felt much less clear and much more contentious. It seemed super obvious to me that people would draw a line from "men's rights activists" trying to push this idea that "misandry", as a systemic oppression of men by women, to "transmisandry", and assume some ill intent where there was none. It's confusing!

"Transandrophobia" was the better of two options being floated at the time, at least in any conversation I saw. "Anti-transmasculinity" was not really a term I'd been made aware of, if anyone at all was talking about it at the time.

I have seen people pick up "anti-transmasculinity" more recently (maybe in the last year?), and this is definitely the first I've seen someone shorten it to "ATM". The people I've seen use that term have been mostly people who seem really new to the conversation, and the vibe I've gotten has been very, like, "we're the Good Transmascs, our word isn't dirty and gross like those other Bad Transmascs everyone hates. you'll listen to us now that our word is Good and Pure, right?"

Which is like... kind of frustrating, and kind of sad, honestly. I think these people honestly believe that if they just choose the right word, all the people who've been dragging me and every other transmasc talking about these issues through the mud for the last 4 years or so will really just stop & listen. If they can just say it right, these people- who have been relentlessly harassing and spreading lies about every single transmasc who came before them for years now- will care what they have to say, and will be willing to engage with them in earnest, compassionate dialogue.

If you just find the right word, all of these people will care about your hurt, your pain, and the suffering of your community.

It kind of breaks my heart. It's an incredibly hopeful, kind, loving way to view the world. It's compassion and patience and forgiveness that these folks are not being given, but that they so badly want to offer to others.

And at the same time, it sucks to be the Bad Transmasc. It sucks to have fought so hard for so long, and for the people I've been fighting for all this time to turn around and say, "you're gross, and dirty, and evil, and everything you've done is a mistake." It sucks to see the people I've been fighting for agree with the people I've been fighting against, and shove me under the bus in an effort to appeal to the people running me over with it. Knowing that the bus is going to aim for them once it's done with me just makes it sadder, yknow?

@saint-speaks wasn't the first person to ever speak the word "transandrophobia", but he is the one who coined and popularized it in its current form. And then he was dragged through the mud so hard and so brutally that some people think I coined it, just because when I defended him (too little and too late, imo) I withstood the mud-dragging better than he did (and gee, I wonder white.)

And now people take for granted that everything everyone said about hymn to justify that frankly fucking evil harassment campaign was true, actually, and we should abandon the word he coined and find one with purer origins.

If you honestly think "anti-transmasculinity" is just a more practical word, that's fine. I don't care what word we use. But they're going to cover it in mud, too. They're going to cover every one of you in mud.

Will you keep fighting for "ATM" once they make it the new dirty, gross, bad, evil word? Will you keep fighting when they drag you and everyone else through the mud for using it? Or will you agree with them, make up a new word, and never look back?

Please don't let us drown in the mud. We've been fighting for you, and we want to fight with you. Please.

[lazycats-stuff]

HEYYY, firstly how are you! I wanted to ask if you could write about a teen male reader with the Batfam. He is kinda like the winter soldier if you know what I mean ( skilled fighter, metal arm..), since he lived with the Batfam he was doing a good mental recovery, but one day he goes back to winter soldier mode on the fam, and they try to get him back to normal again, idk

Thanks you bye !

Hi anon, I'm well and I hope you are doing okay too. I can do it, no worries.

Summary: (Y/N) gets back into the Winter Soldier mode.

Warnings: implications of torture, mind control, mentions of Hydra, Bruce is sad for (Y/N), some violence... And everything else that goes with Hydra and brain washing.

The road to recovery is often a long one. Bruce thought of it when he first saw (Y/N), aka the Winter Soldier. The infamous one, a ghost within the intel community. Many people didn't believe that the Winter Soldier even existed. But the trail of neat and clean murders was the one thing that made Bruce think there is something more.

Of course, the way to get (Y/N) was hell. Hell being and understatement of the decade. Bruce at one thought that he was indeed chasing a Ghost, but something in his mind told him that the Winter Soldier was real. Something in his gut made him chase that ghost.

Months of chasing, fighting and hoping he would be alive by the next encounter, they finally got him. Bruce was lucky to be alive. He hugged all of his kids right then and there. (Y/N) was put into a glass box, strong enough to contain Bane.

(Y/N) refused to back down, refused to retreat. He punched the glass of the cage with his metal arm and some were worried that he would actually brake it. Bruce knew that even if he broke the glass, he had no handler anymore.

His organization has been destroyed. Everyone important was caught. Those who weren't... Well, their time was running out. They may have scattered like rats, but you can bet your ass on anything that the League would find them all. Especially since they didn't burn down their base. One hell of a mistake.

Bruce and the rest searched through the base and they found something that can only be considered as a holy grail when it comes to someone who was brainwashed.

A dark red book, bounded in leather, with all the trigger words written on those pages... Bruce knew that he has hit a jackpot. He looked through them and then has decided to burn it. They also found the footage of (Y/N)'s brainwashing,

The footage, as much as it is damning, making it very easy to persecute anyone they needed, it was also nauseating. (Y/N) was tortured with electricity, memory wiped with electricity... Worse of all, (Y/N) fighting.

It had shaken Bruce to his core and made him triple check the manor security and it has made him check on his sons 5 times that night. He couldn't sleep at all. He refused to sleep that one single evening and night.

And when he stood in front of the glass cage, (Y/N) looked utterly defeated. He was sitting down, looking down at his metal arm and his human arm. He seemed mad beyond belief that he was even caught. Bruce knew he would have to be delicate and gentle with this (Y/N). He had taken the book with him, to try and have some sort of leverage.

And to show him that he was free. (Y/N) was finally free of the mental shackles that they have put on him. Bruce took a chair and sat down near the cell, but far enough to make sure that there was some sort of space.

He couldn't have (Y/N) feel cornered.

He sat down, book in his lap. (Y/N) still looked down, but looked up after a few moments.

" They will come and get me back. " (Y/N) said and Bruce wanted to laugh.

" Hydra is gone. " Bruce simply stated and watched (Y/N)'s reaction.

Nothing. Huh.

" Lies. "

Bruce stayed calm and shook his head. " I'm afraid I'm telling you the truth. The book you see in my hands? The book with your trigger words. Do you really think they would hand it over ever so willingly? " Bruce asked, showing him the dark red leather book.

" You are officially free. " Bruce said as and watched the way (Y/N) reacted.

Bruce nearly broke when he saw hope in (Y/N)'s eyes. He never lost hope.

" I'll never be free... " (Y/N) said quietly, looking at his metal arm. Bruce saw that it was not a nice arms, made with quality. While it looked strong, it wasn't made to be comfortable. And Bruce could see the claw marks at the part where the flesh and metal met.

" That may be true. But you can start healing. You can start working through all of the trauma that they put you through. Mental scars will always be there, but I can help you. " Bruce said softly and (Y/N) was still emotionless and with hope glimmering in his eyes, there was something else too. Bruce could only decipher it as happiness, but he knew that (Y/N) would rather die than admit it.

" I'll be with you the entire way. I have a great friend who can help you unpack everything they put you through. And I can give you a better metal arm, something that wouldn't be so uncomfortable and something that reminds you off the organization. " Bruce said as he looked at (Y/N), holding the book close.

" And what about the book? "(Y/N) asked quietly and Bruce knew exactly what (Y/N) meant.

" It will be destroyed by me. I wanted to show you that the thing keeping you in their grasp is destroyed. Well, will be destroyed. " Bruce said as he put the book down on the chair before moving closer.

" And you can officially start your new life. "

" I'm not sure if I can... " (Y/N) said softly and the defenses were slowly cracking.

" I can assure you, you can. You will have to put some work into it, but it will pay off. I'll be there to help you to start. "

" But the feeling of guilt will never go away, will it? "

" After some time it will. One way is to go through therapy and work it out or you can become a hero. But that only if you want it and after you went through therapy. " Bruce said softly.

" Maybe then I'll atone for it... " (Y/N) said softly.

" One step at the time (Y/N). One step at the time. " Bruce said softly.

And that's exactly what has happened at the time. Bruce made sure to be with (Y/N) before and after the therapy sessions. He made sure (Y/N) knew he had support while he was talking to the Black Canary. And once Black Canary said he could start meeting new people, Bruce slowly started bringing his sons around.

Damian knew exactly how (Y/N) felt. Being in that environment is not easy and it's just the battle of the fittest. And one hell of a battle for your mind. You truly had to be strong enough to make sure to not completely break. Somehow, (Y/N) has kept his humanity, but he had to give a part of his soul to keep it.

Jason just talked to him about stuff and has made sure that he has access to TV shows and movies. (Y/N) needed to be connected to the outside world. And also, Jason has been bringing books for (Y/N) to read. Jason took him his favorites and often took him some classics. (Y/N) appreciated it and liked all the recommendations that Jason has brought to him. It was a nice break.

Tim has always sneaked in some snacks and the two would just talk. It was a hell of a time and since (Y/N) has started school, Tim would help with mathematics and some other subjects. (Y/N) couldn't really go to a public school or any type of school, but he still needs his high school diploma.

And Dick? Dick has been involved in making sure that (Y/N) was getting physical activity. (Y/N) was stiff in Dick's opinion and he wanted to make sure (Y/N) felt good in his body too. Dick did stretches, some tricks and considering that (Y/N) did have some knowledge about gymnastics, it was slightly easier. Not to mention, stretches were something that everyone needs.

About a year after being saved, (Y/N) has moved into the Wayne Manor. It was a nice change of scenery for (Y/N). Beautiful manor, garden, not to mention no noises... And Titus, the Great Dane being an emotional support animal for (Y/N)...

(Y/N) was incredibly happy, but had hard time showing it. Everyone knew but didn't comment on it. They were helping him get adjusted to his new life now and they were more than happy to help. And one thing that made (Y/N) happy out of his mind was the fact that he got a new metal arm. It was black, with red, blue and green accents. It was something to signalized that he was a member of the family.

Bruce was going to adopt him soon enough. Just give him some time and he will do it.

But something happened at the two month mark. Something made him reverse back into the Winter Soldier mode. Bruce was certain that they wiped the triggers from his mind. Not to mention, the boys remembered the trigger words, just in case something like this happened and that they could be careful.

But something must have snapped inside of (Y/N). The boys were careful, but something must have gone awry. Something.

Jason and Dick were the first ones to see it and were the first ones to see it and the brunt end of it. Jason was hurled out the window, while Dick was thrown at the wall like a rag doll. The commotion woke Tim up and Damian was curious as to what was going on.

They were also thrown around the room.

" (Y/N), you are not a Winter Soldier, relax! " Jason said as he made his way through the window, grunting at the pain.

" Please, (Y/N) this is not you! " Dick yelled as he gripped his sides, huffing and panting.

(Y/N), seemingly didn't hear anything and nothing was reaching him. The cold and murderous look in his eyes was more than enough to tell them that they had to subdue him.

Somehow.

Damian jumped on (Y/N)'s shoulders, trying to take his metal arm off. Once they get that off, they are going to be fine. They hope at least.

" (Y/N) come on! Fight it! " Damian raised his voice, trying to make (Y/N) see his senses. (Y/N) didn't listen and threw himself into the wall, back first to throw Damian off and then he threw Damian into the shelves, making him groan in pain.

Bruce walked in from the outside and froze in shock. His adopted sons in various stages of pain and (Y/N) in the Winter Soldier mode. Bruce stayed calm as he glanced over his sons.

They were alive and breathing. That's the important thing right now.

" (Y/N) listen to me. " Bruce said softly as he moved closer, quickly checking on his sons, who were all softly confirming that they were good.

" Look at me. Remember me. It's Bruce. You are safe. The Winter Soldier doesn't control you, you control him. " Bruce said, raising his hands in the air, trying to make sure that he didn't look like threatening.

" You control him, remember that. " Bruce said as he quickly checked on Jason.

(Y/N) looked like he was confused and shook his head. Bruce watched in silence as (Y/N) was getting his bearings together. And once he saw tears falling down his cheeks, he swooped in and hugged his son.

(Y/N) wept as Bruce embraced him and everyone, including Alfred, brought him into a hug. It was a tight hug and Bruce refused to let (Y/N) shatter. And (Y/N) felt safe Bruce's embrace, but by God, guilt was eating him alive.

Apologies were falling from his lips and everyone assured him that it wasn't his fault. It really wasn't his fault.

[spaceysoupy]

So apparently it’s that time of year again where I have to post about this.

On lesbianism, white queerness, and 2S identity

Text below readmore

I am a two-spirit. My identity is specific to my Tribe and Clan, and even more specific to my family. I am not a man, I am not a woman, and I am not nonbinary; I am not defined by what I am not.

I am a two-spirit and I am a lesbian. That's not debatable.

But I am not a non-man.

There's an idea of two-spirits that we are just the ethnic version of non-binary

We're not. The reason you're so comfortable calling us nonbinary is because your idea of queerness is centered around the binary&what you are not: you're not cishet, you're not the oppressor, etc

White queers like to speak about 2S identities constantly as if we are monolith. "It's just a gender" "it's not a gender"

"they're not trans" "they're not queer" "they don't belong here"

The community tries to decide for the individual and that's so weird to me.

So much of white queerness is inherently about exclusion.

You need strict labels to exclude the people you fear. You write your definitions around your fear of intruders and by consequence you exclude the people that need your support the most.

You need people to "prove" they are queer before you let them in. You're like a fortress and you let vulnerable people drown in the moat; ignoring that the real oppressors don't need to be a Trojan horse to do damage, ignoring they are actively burning down the castle.

It's very sad to me, because it's ultimately tearing the community apart even further.

I've never felt very welcome in white lesbian circles and they've never understood my experience of gender, but it's gotten worse in the past 5 or so years.

As TERFs start to revive gold star lesbianism and center hatred of men as their definition of lesbianism, you start to get these younger lesbians that don't know history that start to parrot the rhetoric. First it's "non-men loving non-men" then it's "you're too close to Man™"

For many two-spirit lesbians like myself, this is very concerning. White lesbians are historically not the ones targeted by radfems.

Now we've gotten to the point that there are people denying that lesbian is an spec (multispec) identity while including (white) nonbinary people

White nonbinary people (usually AFAB nonbinary people) are seen as woman lite and are welcome in white lesbian spaces while queer Indigenous people are considered dangerous because white lesbians can't understand their gender.

When did understanding become a requirement?

We're getting very dangerously close to "lesbianism is ONLY attraction to women" and very close to "lesbianism is only attraction to *a very specific type of (white) woman*" and I really need young white lesbians to read about political lesbianism so they can see this

I don't want to hear "not all lesbians" or "well then they aren't welcome" because every time this rhetoric goes unchallenged you are actively welcoming these people to continue it and make it more and more extreme. Yes, even the kind that seems to have nothing to do with racism

Almost all of your exclusionary rhetoric is based on the racist ideas of political lesbianism and I do not know why you all cannot see that they want to move goalposts. It wasn't just bi lesbians, it wasn't just he/him lesbians, it wasn't just nonbinary lesbians. It's a tactic.

It really feels like young lesbians are not only letting us go backwards, but encouraging it. And that's thanks in part to the historical racism of political lesbianism, but many of these people ARE old enough to think critically and talk to people who've been through this.

So far I've seen this in younger lesbian spaces; the ones with older generations (the ones that don't welcome TERFs) have been pretty welcoming even if not totally understanding, because they at least recognize that you don't need to understand someone's experience to validate it.

But I'm really concerned for the young Indigenous lesbians who don't feel comfortable around older people and are going to these younger lesbian spaces only to be indoctrinated with thinly veiled TERF rhetoric. It makes me very concerned for our spaces as well.

So I'll say again

I am not a non-man and I am not a non-woman. I'm not defined by what I am not. I do not ascribe to your binary-centric definitions of queerness. I experience queer attraction to women. I'm a lesbian. You do not get to use community to decide my individuality.

Thread by ~Alitsanosga

Pronouns: hi'a/vsgina/utseli/uwasa

[ekpriyasi]

𝗡𝗘𝗖𝗞 𝗞𝗜𝗦𝗦𝗘𝗦

𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴 : jungkook x reader

𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: yandere, best friend to lover, jungkook is a hotty, angst

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴: oc is sad and lonely

𝗦𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 : He loves bieng my friend ,but he has girlfriend who he loves ....could this possibly change him from your close friend to a distant person .. And 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘬 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘵

𝗮/𝗻 :omg, this is my first fic here, I don't know how to feel.jungkook is kindy fucked up here but gonna be good soon.. Sorry english is not my first language so correct me if there is any mistake ,I hope you enjoy. , lob ❤

𝘔𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘣𝘰𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺... 𝘉y lovely @xonga ..

------------------☆♡☆♡☆♡☆---------------

The purest form of love is consideration.When someone thinks about how things would make you feel. Pays attention to detail. Holds you in regard when making decisions that could affect you. In any bond, how much they care about you can be found in how much they consider you

And as for jungkook , it was beyond clear that how much he loved you.. cause the way he considered you even in his own relationships. he loved you as a friend, a friend he cared for a lot. There was nothing more . Was it? No. You were convinced.

But today when you were staring at the ceiling considering about many possibilities. That was now making your best friend distant to you. Today was the seventh day since you last hanged out with him. He didn't cut you of completely , no would never. But the dry replies of him everyday when you wanted to know how his day was or is he doing well , made your heart twist in sadness and loneliness. The distance was uncomfortable as it was new. Never before did jungkook did anything like this. He was always communicative, always loved hanging out and being with you

And you felt empty . Yes you were his habit and he was your. Jungkook never went even two days without being in contact with you. He was touchy. It was his love language. He loved holding you close to him , keeping your legs on his laps when watching movies, keeping his hand on your knee or thighs when hanging out at your friends house ,holding hands when walking and He also had a habit ( more of obsession ) HE LOVED KISSING YOUR NECK WHEN LEAVING YOUR HOUSE, WHEN EVER HE FELT NERVOUS OR UNCOMFORTABLE. he did that literally every day without missing any day

But today was day seventh of him not touching you or kissing your neck. Your friends always used to tease you and jungkook that how you two were more intimate than friends. Some of your batchmates considered you two in relationship four years ago but now you two are not in college. You are two mature people who know their relationship is just friendship.

Jungkook had a quite few relationship back in college but no stayed more than few months because all his girlfriends were not able to take the close proximity of you two.. But with his current girlfriend. His relationship seemed quite serious. It's been a year now to relationship. His gf is pretty , nice, hot. She is all you can never be, she seems to get along with all yours and jungkook's friend. But with you case was different she rarely talked to you. Even didn't liked you being near jungkook. . And you knew one day this could be a reason for jungkook to choose between you two.... Well it looked like he chose! Not you but her.

Your eyes dart towards the mirror, hanging on the pale lilac wall of your bedroom. Photographs of the two of you are splattered around the mirror, many from childhood of just the two of you. He’s the one person who could read you like a book studied a thousand times over, edges folded from the constant turn of each page. Now it’s as if the book has lost its meaning, forgotten somewhere on a shelf in the corner, dust piled upon it as the sheets slowly deteriorate.. He turned cold .

. Back when you where teenagers. There was nothing more you wanted because you had it all good grades, a best friend and his constant comfort. So you never considered making more close friends of your. All friends you have now are all who jungkook usually hangs out with when not with you.

You never even had a boyfriend. Cause first you didn't think you needed a one, and second most of the boys liked staying alway from you as they found jungkook threatening. But now when you felt jungkook abandoning you. You somehow felt the need for a boyfriend , a lover, a partner who would be by your side and comfort you no matter what.

Okay., so now is the time for you to get laid and ignore all the emptiness you feel. Time for you to let go or even lose your virginity.......

( part 2 : -

[ohnopeh]

daydreaming about ian and mickey made me realise how mickey knows ian so well he can tell if he’s having an episode or not. considering how in s11 they discussed a lot about finding a job, money stress and what else, mickey did his best to fix things and make ian happy, less stressed.

the only moment he pushed ian not to dwell on his feelings was when he noticed how he ate and drank a lot in the morning, he probably also realised he was awake and stiff that day in bed— he tried to push him out of what could have been the start of a depressive episode by playing it cool, knowing ian gets defensive when it comes to his disorder. and i love so much how at the end of day, once they were back home, ian seemed sad so mickey voiced his concerns for him, probably wondering if he managed to help him feel better or not, how it’s important for both of them to communicate about their feelings but still trying to give ian time to understand it himself.

they have each others back and i love them so much.

[t3a-tan]

Romantic and Hopeless (1/?)

First / Previous / Next

Based on @tinyundercover's soulmate AU mechanics! Kind of heavy... I want to continue it though! To have Oscar and Sammy meet at least. Enjoy ^^

---

“Hello?”

Sammy's breathing hitched as she heard the voice suddenly echo in her head, her attempt at sleeping being ruined immediately. She managed to avoid jolting from surprise, and glanced down at Tanner's sleeping form to ensure he wasn't stirring. The boy continued to snore softly curled into her body heat.

“Hello? Are you there? Oh, um… put your hands together to respond! Like praying. And then just think. I know some people don't really know about soulmates.”

It sounded like a boy around her own age, and he was very excited. Sammy hesitantly shifted her hands away from where she had been cradling Tanner, and interlocked her fingers. She tilted her head, brows furrowed. Soulmate? I think I remember something about that...

“Hi?” Her mental voice was confused and unsure.

“Oh my gosh. Hey! You have no idea how much I've been looking forward to meeting my soulmate..! Let me know if I'm being too much, okay? Hm… what are you up to right now? Am I interrupting anything?”

Sammy glanced out of the glass enclosure she and her brother were being contained in, barely able to see anything as the only things illuminating the room were a few alarms and other random lights. Ryker had left the lab at the same time as usual, so they were trying to sleep as much as possible until he was back.

“I'm trying to sleep.” She responded simply. There was very little point in communicating with her soulmate considering the situation Sammy was in, but she had to admit that it was nice to hear a new voice. A friendly voice.

“Oh. Just going to bed early, or are you in a different time zone?” The voice replied and Sammy blinked with confusion.

“Time zone?”

“Yeah! It's like um… uh… wow. I guess I don't know what a time zone is. Here— What time is it for you?” A small smile of amusement managed to break out on Sammy's tired expression. She had to admit that whoever this guy was he sounded like someone she would get along with. Too bad I'll never meet him.

“I don't know what time it is. There are no windows down here.” Hopefully that would clue him in on her situation a bit. Borrowers usually kept track of the time consistently, but Sammy had no idea what time it was, what day it was, what month it was, or even the year. She was probably close to 18 though if her soulmate was speaking to her.

“What do you mean? Can't you check outside if you don't have a clock?” Came the answer, and Sammy couldn't help but sigh. She really didn't feel like telling this stranger her sob story, no matter how nice his voice sounded.

“I just go to sleep when I'm tired. I could stay awake a bit longer though… Tell me about yourself.” She casually changed the subject, with enough force that it would be hard to go back but not too much that it was obvious she didn't want to discuss it. It seemed to work because she heard his voice chime in reply.

“Well— we can't tell each other our names, but just imagine my name is super cool, yeah? Uhh… let's start with basic basics I guess. My favourite colour is red, my favourite food is…pasta. And. Hm. Well, I just turned 18, so it's my birthday.” He responded, clearly sheepish about being put on the spot.

“Happy birthday to you then. What's the date again?” She asked, unsure of how old she was at this point, but guessing she was almost 18. She knew for a fact that it had been around 3 years so far because Ryker would occasionally make mentions of the passing time.

“It’s July 17th. How old are you by the way?”

“17. Hopefully 18 in January.” The ‘hopefully’ slipped out instinctively; Sammy wasn't under any delusion that she had no chance of dying before reaching her next birthday, and she didn't feel sad about it necessarily. She had already spent so long in this kind of mindset that it was more of a statement of fact than anything else.

She looked down at Tanner again. So he'll be 14 in October then. Time flies. If I count the days I might be able to wish him a happy birthday on the actual day.

“Hey, don't talk like that. Maybe I'll even get to wish you a happy birthday in person..!” Her soulmate responded positively, and Sammy smiled sadly, looking down at her scuffed knees and bruised legs, pulling the hem of her gown down a bit more.

“Maybe.” No. There was no chance she was getting out of here. Ryker was watching things much too closely, and Sammy knew she was getting more and more exhausted by the week. It was hard to keep fighting when it was easier to give in.

It didn't take long for Sammy to realise something was off about her soulmate. He never spoke about typical borrower things— he talked almost like a human most of the time, mentioning friends coming over as if it was like popping from burrow to burrow. He said he liked video games, and at first Sammy assumed he liked watching humans play video games but then he had also mentioned playing them himself.

The most damning thing to convince her though was the food. Even if he ate the same thing most days, that thing was certainly nothing a borrower would have access to so regularly. Sammy's parents had always tried to keep a variety of food whilst she and Tanner were growing up, but they couldn't have regular meals, especially not more than once a week.

When he mentioned skipping school that's what 100% solidified it for her. Her soulmate was a human. Somehow. And that thought scared her.

“Hey, are you feeling alright? You've not been responding much recently… If I can do anything to help, let me know.” Sammy was once again presented with a dilemma at the sound of her soulmate’s soothing voice. He sounded genuine, but Sammy knew humans weren't capable of that. They were monsters, plain and simple. If they are nice one moment they'll be terrible the next.

She glanced in Ryker's direction, confirming that he was distracted writing on his stupid notebook before clasping her hands together and closing her eyes.

“Sorry. I'm just feeling a bit tired lately. I—”

“What are you doing?” Sammy jolted in surprise, her hands immediately unclasping as the rumbling of Ryker's voice fell over her. His grey eyes bore down on her and a shiver ran up her spine from the contact, only keeping her sense enough to not backpedal away. Her mouth opened but an explanation wouldn't come to her lips; what could she really say she was doing instead?

“You what?”

“I must say, you don't seem the religious type, Sammy. This isn't the first time I've seen you put your hands together like that after all.” He gestured over his shoulder towards one of the cameras that were pointing towards the glass enclosure, his eyes never leaving Sammy's form.

She cursed internally. Since Ryker hadn't mentioned it up until now she figured it had either not been visible to the cameras or that he wasn't checking them regularly. Turns out, like the snake he was, he had just been waiting to catch her off guard in the act.

“Lost your train of thought? I get that. I forget what I’m saying half the time too.”

“I…got a soulmate…” She responded, brows furrowing with frustration and gaze pointed away from the doctor. She figured he would already know what that was— it wasn't like it was uncommon for humans after all— but his expression didn't change. He only dragged his notebook over to sit in front of him again, clicking his pen.

“And what does that entail? I presume it's some sort of link between you and a partner. Probably telepathic. How interesting…” Sammy could spy what seemed to be a genuinely curious look in his eyes and the hint of a smile playing at his lips. She had never seen him express much of any emotion besides anger before, and the fact that she didn't know what his smile meant frightened her.

As she was internally panicking over what that smile might mean for her, she snapped out of it when he spoke again.

“Well? Is it?” Sammy nodded, shrinking back when Ryker's excitement seemed to increase at her confirmation. “How intriguing. I noticed there was something a bit different about… hm.. but…”

He trailed off, just leaving Sammy with questions and no answers. She was nervous about putting her hands together again, unsure if that would get her in trouble. Ryker had gone through great lengths to completely shut her and Tanner off from any hope after all…

What if he tied my arms down? Or cut them off…or tied my arms to my torso… or…

“Go ahead and speak to them, her, him again. I want to watch more closely.” It wasn't a request. Sammy knew that much by now. She could feel her heart pounding in her chest as she shakily clasped her hands together, closing her eyes.

“H-hey. Sorry, I'm really fucking scared right now. I don't know if we'll be able to talk after this.” The words came from her faster than she could think them through, and she couldn't help but curse again at her panicked apology. “Shit.”

“Woah woah— what's wrong? Are you in danger?”

Sammy's eyes opened briefly, watching Ryker scribble away in his notebook again, recognizing that he was writing at the same pace that words were being shared. That's impossible. She closed her eyes, shoulders bunching up.

“No. Yes. Maybe. All of the above? I can't tell you. I don't know how, but I think he's listening.” The scribbling stopped abruptly for a couple seconds, before slowly starting up again. Sammy took a breath to calm her racing heart, angry tears pricking at the corners of her eyes at the fact that Ryker was once again taking something from her.

“Fuck you, this is private.” She flinched instinctively, waiting for a retaliation. When she didn't receive one she tried to sit up straight again, and noticed that her soulmate had gone quiet. “If I could explain, I would. But it's better if you forget me since I'm probably gonna die anyway.”

“I-I don't understand. I'm sure you're not gonna die, right? Just… it's gonna be okay, yeah? It will.” Sammy nearly groaned. She could tell that he probably thought she was just having a psychotic break or something, which as understandable as that was it was still incredibly frustrating.

“The bad man's name is Dr. Zorro Ryk—”

“That's enough of that.” Sammy cried out as she felt oversized fingers easily pry her hands apart, pinching onto her arm. Ryker was looking down at her with a cold gaze, his shadow enveloping her from above. “You are such an enigma, Sammy... I know you're a child, but sometimes you are so very intelligent and then you can be so incredibly stupid.”

“Let go!” She shouted, trying and failing to pull her arm away, staring at the fingers pinching it with a panicked gaze. Although the grip wasn't painful, it was still terrifying to feel something so large clamped around her limb. She knew that at any moment if Ryker decided to press down her arm would not work again.

“You— you got cut off again. I'm worried. Fuck, if I knew your name this would be much easier… Can you just tell me if you're okay? Please.” Sammy shut her eyes and shook her head— that soothing voice she had grown to enjoy now just tormenting her. Teasing her with what she knew she couldn't have.

It's always too good to be true.

“If you knew I was listening, why would you say that? Do you not have a brain in that tiny little body, hm? Because someone with a brain would not throw away their chances of communication so readily..!” He snapped, tone scolding and yet it still frightened Sammy enough to make her tremble.

“People who do not think are just corpses walking. Get that through your skull… What were you expecting to happen? No one is going to help you. Do you understand that? It doesn't matter if they know that name or not.” He growled. “Not only that, but you didn't even consider your soulmate's safety. You don't know the nature of how I'm listening. What if I knew who he was and killed him because of what you said?”

Sammy's face paled at that, tears welling in her eyes and blurring her vision.

“Don’t!”

His eyes narrowed at her, and although his frustration grew his fingers never once changed the amount of pressure on her arm. Sammy was too distressed to really notice that though, just trying to pull away again. The finger then moved, forcing her to stumble forwards with a yelp.

“Or what? You know you cannot stop me. How many times do I have to tell you not to make demands of people you can't handle yourself.” Sammy felt herself getting tugged forwards again, and her breathing quickened, really believing he was going to crush her hand or arm to prevent her from speaking to her soulmate again. She shut her eyes tightly.

“M-mum…” She whimpered under her breath as some tears spilled over. At the end of the day, it didn't matter how many years passed or how tough she liked to act or how many injuries she had acquired… She was still scared.

The grip on her arm suddenly disappeared and she lost her balance, immediately crumbling to the ground and burying her face into her arms, facing away from the doctor as she hiccuped. The silence only lasted a few seconds but it felt like minutes to Sammy…

Ryker cleared his throat.

“If you speak to him again, you will wish you never had. Understood?”

[utilitycaster]

How can Molly's death be considered a major mistake? It's the crux of the entire campaign.

so I think about this a lot, because you're right, and it really comes down to like...a lot of factors in how people interact with fiction, and some stuff I feel about fandom.

The short answer is that Molly is some people's favorite character, and they really wanted to watch him for 141 episodes and not just 26, and they didn't get to, and so it's valid to feel sad about that. But I think what personally grinds my gears is the idea that it's a mistake and because this is a Fan Favorite character he SHOULD have come back. Setting aside the fact that he had both his fans and his detractors from the start and a lot of people (myself included) who found him irritating didn't say much for a good chunk of C2 because, well, he was dead, this isn't a fucking competitive reality show. You don't get to vote on your phones to decide who wins a resurrection.

I think the longer answer is that there is a certain type of person in fandom, born of a certain type of person in social media communities, who just...is not willing or interested in considering not just that their experiences, preferences, and philosophy are not universal, but also that they are not objectively best and correct and that everyone who disagrees is wrong. It's often really common in, though not exclusive to, people who have particularly limited experiences - young (like, teenager/early 20s), people who haven't lived in a diverse area or in multiple different areas, people who for whatever reason do not get out much - which both makes sense (haven't been exposed to a ton of different perspectives irl) but also means that you get people who, for all they may talk about global politics, kind of unconsciously seem to act as though everyone they interact with online is a variant of someone from the same 3000 person town in the United States in which they've spent all 21 years of their life. ANYWAY getting back to the main point I feel like Molly attracted a lot of that kind of person, who just...doesn't get that while Molly is, to them, a deeply validating expression of gender identity, for many people he is "guy you meet at your friend's birthday party in a two-bedroom 6 floor walk up and within 5 seconds he has pissed you off so profoundly with his overfamiliarity that you go into the kitchen and mainline as much vanilla vodka as possible to not stab this guy with a secondhand knife that says "CHEESE!" on it even though you hate vanilla vodka and it's summer in NYC and you're on the 6th floor in a small apartment with too many people so it's approximately 117 degrees Fahrenheit in this kitchen and the vodka isn't much cooler, and you succeed in this goal, and then after sending your friend who couldn't make it because they were at a family thing that weekend a picture of a rat on the tracks of the 3 train with a caption "this u?" at 1:54 in the morning you're like "so this guy Molly was there" and they're like "oh my god I met him at Cameron's last party, he SUCKS" and you're like "I KNOW". Like a lot of people just do not get that Molly was very popular with their circle, and also a lot of people either were neutral-to-not-feeling-it. This is before we get into the post-death idealization of who he was that takes him from "irritating but I think he'd have grown on me in some ways eventually had he lived" to "horrible and insufferable fake-ass bitch."

And then we get to the true impasse: the idea that something that does not fulfill every single one of your personal wishes might still be a great story.

I'm certainly not perfect, and there's things I thought I wanted for the end of C2 that I didn't get, and there's some things I do wish we'd have gotten to see (or that we'd have done in C3), but I like to think that I try to remain at least partially open to the possibilities. I like to think that my enjoyment of a story isn't contingent on whether one single character survives, even if they are my favorite (and I say this as someone whose favorite ASOIAF character was immediately Ned Stark, a statement that should surprise no one who follows me) nor that the story precisely reaffirms my existing worldview. I want stories to tell me something new and interesting that wouldn't come from my own head, and I want them to sell me on it. I think that a lot of people lost the thread of the importance of representation, namely, they forgot that while it's great to see people like you in a story, you should also be trying to see people not like you and perspectives that aren't yours. I am extremely defensive of my and other people's right to say "I didn't like this story and here is why" without someone being like "Give it a chance! Here's why I think it's good" but at the same time, there is a difference between "I really wish Molly had stayed alive and I don't like that he died," and "everything that happened after he died was A Mistake because it wasn't what I Wanted, and someone should fix this." Like that's what toddlers do. That's not an adult way of interacting with narrative.

So those people don't even get to the point of "the entire campaign is deeply influenced by the loss of Molly; that is what binds the rest of the Nein together and makes them what they are; the fact that Lucien wears the face of a departed friend is crucial to the entire final arc comprising about 20% of the campaign; and the fact that he does not come back, but someone new, with new chances and new choices to make does is emblematic of a campaign about people who find that they cannot undo their pasts, but neither are they trapped or damned by them." They're stuck at "guy I liked died and I'm throwing a tantrum 6 years later."

[whimsicalhorss]

The Recent Nevermore Drama.

Red, I think it's quite sad that you decided to delete all the original comments going against you and reexplaining what went down within your 'apology', which was 95% calling out rather than talking about the cause of the whole uprising. Nonetheless, here was my original reply, just so everybody who stumbles across this post can see the reply from somebody who's viewed it from both sides. The original message was, as follows:

'Hey Red,

I hope you're managing amidst everything that's been going on. I know you've been through a lot recently, and I hate to add to the messages you've been receiving. However, there are some things that I really need to talk to you about.

Over the past few days — even years — I've noticed some things that really concern me. It feels like there's been a lot of blame unfairly placed on certain individuals within your community, which is incredibly damaging, especially when it unfairly paints others in a negative light. I understand you've been trying to address the situation with Crimson, but the approach taken hasn't been effective and has caused more harm than good.

In terms of the Crimson drama, I think it could have been handled more sensibly. Consulting with Laci and others involved would have been beneficial before making the decision to introduce Crimson back to the server. When you were writing your explanation, which I know was rushed, you should have stepped back and consulted for longer - I know you felt pressured, but.. you needed to give yourself time to handle it.

With the screenshots, too - they were only censored to the point of concealing most of the users involved to keep the MINORS safely out of the evidence, and yet you continued to banter on about how they were censored and unable to interpret what happened. As well, you tampered with evidence when you sent a screenshot, CUTTING OUT the part where Laci mentioned they could give you the evidence uncensored if you asked, yet you continued to complain.

On the topic of minors, you name dropped SEVERAL in your apology. Do you know how endangering or scary that can be? It's insane that you felt the need to name anybody involved to get people off your back.

There's also Sardonyx - I don't know if you'll share this with your patreons but, if you do, hello Sardonyx. They casually aggravate people, make NSFW conversation in YOUR SFW server, and you still allow them to pursue in such a way. They continued to temper people after the initial Crimson argument and started their own, which could have been avoided if you had muted both persons involved (rather than banning everybody against Sardonyx) and asked for them to calm down and explain their conflict in dms.

Also the Bunnybel issue - I know the topic was discussed by people banned, but there's also the factor that neither you, nor your mods stepped in to stop it. Matter of fact, you contributed to it, and everybody went along with it as a fun easter event of drawing your two main protagonists in these outfits that, when looked at closer, actually have a much more terrible implication. You should have handled this earlier, rather than blaming it on somebody and ranting about how it's all their fault and they're in the wrong.

Again with Laci, too - you outright blaming her for everything that has occurred is terrible. Whilst that may be what you see in this whole confrontation, in truth, it really isn't anything like that, Red. Saying that everybody else involved were her 'lackeys' and 'twisted around her finger' was an incompetent, foolish way of pinning all these hardships on her. Some people involved, including me, had barely spoken to Laci prior, because a lot of people cared about the fact that YOU had unbanned a potentially alleged pedophile back into your server full of minors. I know it doesn't seem like everybody cared, but we all did, otherwise we wouldn't have started this whole 'riot' thing or whatever to go against it. I surely cared, considering I have been at the face of two pedophiles sending me unsettling, inappropriate images, and I know that it is hard to reach out to somebody or stop them when they shrug it off so nonchalantly.

Lastly, I think it's hypocritical you spoke about how certain groups were stalker-ish and stealing messages from a patreon chat, despite you taking a chat from private servers and dms. The behaviour is equal, is it not? You used your influence to alter certain texts and take them out of context, and the other groups simply took what you said and proved that you, and unpunished, favourited people who have been held dearly, have done terrible things yourself.

I understand that this whole thing has been overwhelming for you, Red, but I believe that there was a real need for you to approach each situation differently, and not to compile everything into an 'apology' that is 5% apology, and 95% calling out people and altering the blame to be put on them. I think that the tactics you used were poor, and I hope that you do figure out something better in the future.

Take care, and I'm here if you'd like to discuss this any further.

Best regards,

A bystander.' And the second reply I made, aimed at one of her patreons (or moderators? who knows.) who put a whole lot of shit behind a paywall and then continued to support her. Aha, Debobble, if it wasn't illegal, I'd show the whole world you trying to make a fake screenshot of Laci 'configurating her hate schemes', and how terribly it was done. 'Hello!

I hope you're having a joyous, maybe even 'whimsical' day!

A lot of things that have occurred recently are the fault of both 'sides' (if we can call them that. Not 'Laci's lackeys' or 'Clique 1 and 2'.) and I think I should refer to the way that this has been dealt with again. 

Yes, the server was owned by somebody different who was capable of banning Crimson, and it was intended for less SFW purposes, but I think Crimson went outright too far in a predatory way. They put a teenage oc with an adult oc, which is pedophilic behaviour, and sent several overly NSFW images. I assume that this chat was intended for 'implied sexual circumstances', rather than overly perverse, but I could be wrong. I agree in the fact that something should have been done, and I approve of Laci's initial reaching out, but I don't approve of the way Red banned them for as little as they did.

As I like to say; 4 months, 4 minors. You afforded Crimson a month for each minor they influenced in such a predatory way, and I think the time should have been extended.

Might I also add, these screenshots were not 'heavily' censored. They were censored for the safety of the minors and other persons involved and, yet.. Red seems to be content with name dropping every minor who was involved. So much for the safety of her members!

AND I have more to add, which I trust you to hand over to Red for me since you seem content to do that quite often for her - do you mind reminding her and the entire patreon and mod chat that Crimson (and Red, I'm pretty sure) knew the age of one 12 year old, who we might call 'Green'. They continued to share NSFW things to them, including making jokes about what I assume was a 'vibrator in public'. How SFW for a child! Crimson is VERY innocent.

I agree that all of this has gotten out of hand, but both responses, from Red, the moderation team, and the patreon chat against the groups banned for involving themselves, but I wouldn't consider it a mob. Both sides had good intentions, it's just the way Red has gone about it - framing others for her mistakes and outright dismissing people for being concerned about the safety, that has made this come to such a volatile level.

And the whole, breaking several TOS, and a law? If thats what we're doing, what are you doing? Leaking private messages, encouraging predatory behaviour, endangering minors, leaking names which could result in a witch hunt from Red's expanse following? Oh dear..

How volatile.

Best regards,

A bystander.' Red, every little detail you have undergone is such a negative, unredeemable smidge to this massive whiteboard of what you could do. Instead of handling this like the adult, you undertake criticism harshly, which is detrimental considering you are somebody who has been writing for years, which means that you should have matured and adapted to take this kinds of things. You could have taken a month, maybe two, maybe three, to explain the whole Crimson thing - it would have been much less detrimental to yourself, and your community. You absolutely wrecked every second, third, fourth, fifth chance people were tempted to give you with every detail that went in to making sure that YOU felt like you had to be right - name dropping, which could lead to witch hunting with your massive following, especially since the people were minors and specifically requested you keep their names out of it. You allowed an alleged, potential predator back into your server without consulting it with victims - and don't get me started on the whole 'Crimson didn't know!', they knew at least one of them, and still continued. You pinned the blame on Laci, on another person (who has asked me not to say their name and, like the respectful person I am, will not be namedropping. That doesn't seem like a familiar concept to you, does it?) and you keep all these little dirty secrets behind a paywall. Red, in the most respectfully disrespectful way, grow up and learn to be better. You spout all this bull, every little detail and, when it backfires, you cower into a corner, guilt trip, manipulate, and eventually resort to the potential physical or mental harm of other people. It needs to stop. The icing on the cake, to all of this? YOU, as the 'mature adult that would never stand for pedophilic behaviour, that loves their audience, that has a server full of minors', that YOU would delete messages explaining the situation in a different point of view. You don't want your vast following to see these and think, 'huh, maybe Red isn't as good as I thought they were?', well they aren't. I don't know if people will see this but, sincerely, I hope Red, Flynn, DeBobble, the patreons, the moderators, and all of the discord and general following of Nevermore and RnF know that what Red spouts isn't necessarily all true.

Kind regards, A bystander.

[ilsolefiesta]

random astro notes (again)

- Venus + Uranus + references to the 1st / 5th house = people who tend to change their appearance so often. my cousin has Uranus on the Ascendant and the 5th house Venus. she is great at makeup and knows how to change her face with it. she also loves color contacts so much... my Uranus, having a trine with Venus, is in the 5th house. both of us are the only ones in our family (and we have a REALLY big family) who change their hairstyle almost every month. bonus: if you're in a fandom and have these placements, have you ever considered making/made a cosplay of some character? (we both did)

- I believe that the main trio responsible for friendship and mutual understanding is MMM: Mercury (communication), Moon (emotions), and Mars (how we express emotions). other planets may add something, but from my perspective, these are essential. there are two people with whom I feel almost 100% comfortable when it comes to communication - my best friend and my cousin (not those from the previous paragraph, haha).

my MMM placements accordingly: Libra - Taurus - Virgo. 

my best friend's: Sagittarius - Pisces - Aquarius. 

my cousin's: Libra - Cancer - Virgo. 

it's fun because me and my friend perfectly understand reasoning behind each other's emotions, but sometimes misunderstand each other's reaction on these emotions and take each other's words personally (my cynical and sarcastic Virgo and her expressive and unstable Aquarius Mars). as for my cousin, for 22 years we haven't had any significant arguments. sometimes he even calls me his twin, who was born in a different family at a different time. - I'm greatly admired by the 2nd house Saturn's ability to save money. please, teach me. however, I'm so sad to see this placement negatively aspected by Chiron, as it can lead to a fear of spending money on oneself and a feeling that one doesn't deserve it. here I want to teach you. saving is really cool. but please remember that the value of money lies in its usefulness, not just in its existence ♥ - Cancer Sun with a harmonious Moon/just Cancer Moon creates such "mama's boys". I don't mean this in a negative way, they are simply very attached to their mothers. sometimes it's even cute to see how loving they are.

- Mercury in the 5th house has a strong potential to become a teacher. especially, if the 5th house is in Cancer. ESPECIALLY, if Saturn is also here. - Aries Mars in the 1st house can be challenging for women in terms of style. people can often tell them to "act more like a woman", but it can be difficult for them to incorporate a more stereotypically feminine style into their clothing, even if they wish to do so. this can lead to a feeling of "trying too hard to look cute" to the point where it may seem unnatural. their type of femininity is a next level - confident, decisive and notable. I know how strong can be their love to ruffles, pastel colors, floral prints etc. but finally they usually move more to "office sirene" style/sport chic. Thanks for reading! Picture credits: Pinterest

[maxphilippa]

Nickel and Balloon's arc and why you may be wrong about it, and why you are wrong about Suitcase and Nickel as well.

Nickel didn't trust Balloon because Balloon was a dick on s1 (something that the fandom forgets so fucking much), and of course he wouldn't trust Balloon being a part of the alliance either since Baseball (Nickel's best friend) and Suitcase (Nickel's ally/Baseball's closest friend) were part of it. "But Nickel didn't care about Suitcase-" he did, Adam himself did say he did care for her, but he strongly lacks emotional intelligence to truly get her. So of course, he didn't want to risk it, even if he does believe that Balloon wants to change, he doesn't want Suitcase to get involved with the guy.

Although Nickel doesn't want Balloon near and is an asshole towards the guy, I think that all of you kind of also forget that at one point on s2, Nickel did say that he thought that Balloon wanting to change was something good, but that he still didn't want to be associated with the guy. Which is, yes, shitty on his behalf, but it makes sense character wise. It's a case of "it's great that you want to be a better person, but i don't want to be near you even so", which is something most people felt at one point of their life.

Adding to this behaviour of his, again, it wasn't just because "Nickel is a dick without excuses", protecting his loved ones (his alliance) is. Kind of his whole thing. You know. He cares about them but sucks at showing it (this includes how he treated Baseball, looking at you all), he has the thought that if he's on control of a situation, no one will get hurt. He sucks at communication. Hell, it's even said on the series, he is afraid of change and also about accountability. ACCOUNTABILITY.

So yes, the way he treated Balloon isn't justified, even Nickel says it himself, but he has his reasons as to why he acted like that. But I think that you guys also need to remember some more important stuff as well. Nickel wasn't like this because he fully wanted to, but his behaviour towards Balloon was also constantly justified by Baseball.

And so here's the main question that troubles everybody so fucking much it's stupid.

"Why did Nickel change his mind on Balloon on s3 like that? It doesn't make sense"

Listen.

The reason as to why Nickel actually gave himself a chance to know Balloon properly is because of two very important factors. So I know that some of you might not be familiar with the official II comics, but the first reason is in one of the comics actually.

Especifically on the Letters Comic.

The plot of the comic is Balloon writing letters to those who he wronged/had a bad relationship with, and this includes pretty much all of the S1 cast (excluding the ones that are still on S2). And guess what, Nickel gets a letter as well.

There isn't a canon outcome as to what Nickel did with the letter. We don't know if he threw it away or took a look at it. But to me, I think that he did took a look at it. I will explain why later on in this post.

The second reason as to why Nickel's behaviour with Balloon changed on S3 was because, Baseball wasn't there to try to justify Nickel's hatred towards Balloon. In fact, what he got instead was Box, and we know that Box is like, Nickel's best friend on s3. What Box does is basically telling Nickel to get his shit together, stop holding onto stupid grudges and do it for the team.

And he does! And mind you, that was on the first episode of season 3! He decided to put away his petty feelings so the team could work, which pretty much already tells you that meanwhile early s3 Nickel has as much snark as S2 Nickel does, he actually recognizes when it's time to play on the game and when it's time to be petty. He's more of an nuisance towards Balloon on the first ep all things considered, but it seems that unlike S2, Balloon has grown a lot of confidence as well, and isn't sad at Nickel's comments, but rather calls him out on them. And even IF Nickel didn't exactly like to side with Balloon, as the eps went by, despite Box was the main reason as to why they were hanging out, Nickel was actually experiencing Balloon's change. He didn't want to be involved on s2 because BB told him that his distaste was justified (and that ended up messing everything for the Grand Alliance), but now he's "forced" to accept and know the guy because Box told him it was the best for the team. On early s3 they tease eachother, yes, but their relationship seems to be better than before.

As well, it wasn't out of nowhere either way, since Balloon does imply that both Nickel and him hanged around just to mess with Yinyang back at the Hotel.

That's my main reason as to why I think that Nickel DID read the letter in fact, but still had very complicated feelings towards Balloon, because in his mind, to him, Balloon was the reason as to why Suitcase, someone who Nickel really got attached to (even if you can't believe it), "betrayed" him. But we know that's not true. But at the end of the day they do end up hanging around well.

"But Max, why did they end up having a fall again? Aren't they supposed to be healthy?"

First of all there is a reason, second of all, oh my god conflict won't fucking kill you. You see. Nickel SUCKS at communication. He can't let out his feelings as much as he would like to do so, because he's scared of getting hurt and such. So yes, Nickel and Balloon were good friends there, but the down fall was necessary for them in order to ACTUALLY be a healthy friendship. The problem is that Nickel doesn't get that he fucked up a lot more than he thought and that he is the problem.

He still thinks that Suitcase left his side because of Balloon and of course that hurts- but he feels so bad about the way he treated Suitcase as well, even if he's not fully aware of why he feels like that. So that's why the conflict HAD to exist. You can't just expect them to be okay like nothing without talking about S2 properly, it doesn't work like that. Yes, they both care about eachother, but they STILL had to talk about it.

Now, on the yet, most controversial scene when it comes to Nickel's arc: Clover's therapy.

Some people say that Nickel didn't have to just be talked like that and that they expected more, but dare I say, that's exactly what he needed. To talk properly about his feelings. It's like you guys didn't catch up on that. Nickel's thing is being overprotective over those he loves, and seeing the things that might harm said loved ones or himself as threats that he needs to get rid off in order to be okay, and that he is afraid of change. Nickel knew he messed things up, but he still kept on thinking that Balloon was the one that made Suitcase betray him, when that's not really true.

He needed the talk to realize that it was truly his fault. Please take note at the way he looks to the side once he realizes it. It wasn't just a recent thought, it was always there, but he was scared of it coming true. Clover's talk made him open up properly about it and Clover also says it, "but don't you want to?" and then he says "mhm, maybe", but he really does want to, which is why he changes so much on Ep 16.

So before you say that Nickel didn't regret what he did and that he only did because of Clover: how can you be so wrong about something.

And, oh.

Oh, episode 16.

It treated them so well.

What Nickel says here is that he was scared of falling in Balloon's tricks, he was scared of being manipulated. Again. It wasn't out of nowhere. The way he treated Balloon WASN'T out of nowhere.

Is it justified? No. Does II or Nickel himself ever say that it is? No. The series as a whole is telling you that it was awful of him, characters do call out Nickel on his shit behaviour (even if you think they don't, they do, calling out isn't always strong words, sometimes calling out acts as feedback. as pointing things out. of course he also gets called out in the other way on the series, but PLEASE don't say that he didn't get called out because of his actions, he quite literally died because of them), Nickel HIMSELF recognizes that he was awful to Balloon and he is okay with the possibility of Balloon not wanting to forgive him either way.

But they ended up talking things out in the end. They ended up okay, because Balloon can genuinely see that Nickel wants to change. The walls he put are gone. He can see how genuine the guy wants to be.

"But Balloon shouldn't forgive Nickel, not after all the pain he caused to him"

Listen. Both of them commited mistakes. Balloon recognizes that he wasn't a good person back then and wanted to change things. Nickel finally got that and Nickel also showed Balloon that he does mean well. People that had complicated relationships CAN work things out, crazy I know, and I'm saying this as someone who had beef with their now best friend over similar stuff. We apologized and now we're close. It happens.

Balloon really cares about Nickel. And Nickel really cares about Balloon.

And Nickel is okay with Balloon winning because that's his friend now. Nickel changed for the good. And it makes sese character wise.

Nickel regrets what he did to Suitcase and Balloon as a whole. And Balloon and him are best friends now.

So, no, Balloon and Nickel aren't a toxic relationship, much less a problematic ship given all of the circumnstances, and saying that they are is missing on the whole arc they went through. They were complicated and they both had their reasons at the end of the day. No, Nickel wasn't purposefully an asshole to Suitcase, he was seeking to protect her, but ruined everything on the process. Yes, Baseball and Nickel needed to be separated in order to grow because they weren't healthy to eachother. Yes, the Nickel and Balloon arc had to go as long as it did in order for it to end properly, and it's not even done yet, Baseball and Suitcase are still waiting. Yes, Nickel meant good with the things he did. No, it doesn't justify any of the things he did. And, finally, the Grand Alliance arc is well executed, just because it's complicated it doesn't mean it's bad.

And those are statements that can coexist.

Thank you for reading. :]

[rrcenic]

sorry for posting so much about the neil gaiman thing im very opinionated but heres my general take on neil gaiman (TW FOR S/A AND SU1C1D3!!!!)

good omens fandom please read this. yall need it

i wanna start with: believe victims. it might not be as bad as it was claimed to be bc the reporter was an anti bdsm terf who considers all bdsm 🍇 (including the bdsm w neil), but there was still clearly manipulation, weaponized power imbalance, and dubious consent. even if it wasnt s/a, it was fucked up. neil did some fucked up things

while we dont know if he actually s/ad those women, neil gaiman is clearly flawed

ive seen time and time again that his fans (specifically the good omens fandom) can get so viciously defensive of him that they refuse to see any flaws he has

as someone who was ruthlessly attacked because of neil, i hesitate to give him the benefit of the doub

when i had just turned 13, id just gotten on tumblr. i was thrilled that good omens season 2 was coming out. i was even more thrilled to see neil gaiman on tumblr. so i sent him an ask where i asked if crowley and aziraphale would kiss. i get why that was annoying. he probably got those asks all the time. but i worded it respectfully, and i was genuinely unaware that he was annoyed by this question

he responded to my ask with a multi paragraph callout post talking about how sick of this question he was. harsh, but not necessarily nefarious

the response wasnt the problem. it was that i got so many hate comments and death threats and people telling me i didnt deserve joy and i was ruining neils life and so many fucking anon "kys" asks that i had to quit tumblr. i tried to apologize to neil, i sent him countless apology asks where i begged him to ask people to stop cyber bullying me, but he never responded. it took years before i was able to communicate to him all the hate id received. his response was a basic "sorry for the miscommunication" and that he wished there was a way to convey tone on the internet (someone said "there is! tonetags!!" and he responded with "i dont like those"). the SAME COMMUNITY who told me to kms was suddenly saying "oh neil your such a saint" (THE TERM SAINT WAS USED MULTIPLE TIMES!!!!!) and "this poor ignorant child"

i was a kid and i was bullied off the internet and neil didnt respond to my pleas for forgiveness for almost 2 years. i was also in the most unstable time of my life. i was EXTREMELY suicidal. people telling me to kms deeply affected me

plus he reblogs a ton of "vote blue no matter who" stuff. i dont agree w that statement but i think its okay for people to say if they actively support palestine. but neil gaiman doesnt post about palestine ever other than reblogging posts that say "sure maybe the stuff in palestine is bad but if you dont support biden 100% democracy will crumble!!!" also im pretty sure he never apologized for some older zionist posts

ive seen a lot of stuff where people are saying "hey shhh its okay i see good omens fans getting sad bc of the stuff with neil but its ok!! youre still a good person even if you ignore this issue!!" and like. huh??? i dont think ignoring it makes you evil but its certainly fucked up to not be critical of the media you consume. pretending nothings going on is immature. you all sound like jk rowling fans smh

his general attitude towards fans makes me uncomfortable. ive seen people bare their souls in his asks (all of them start with something along the lines of "oh sir mister gaiman sir i am nothing but a disgusting peon compared to you you saved my life id die for you!!!") and he gives rude cold responses. i mean of course he gets annoyed and of course he gets spam but no one is forcing him to respond to asks. he doesnt seem to care very much??? this doesnt make him a bad person ofcourse but it does give me the ick

summary: even if he didnt s/a those women his fans need to grow up. he is not a pure perfect person. he might not be evil but he makes some extremely damaging choices. hes not a saint and never has been. at the end of the day, hes a rich cishet white man

[mirai-e-jump]

Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger Character Book: We're KING!!!!!! Main Cast Member Interviews (translations below, LONG POST)

Taisei Sakai (Gira Husty) Interview

-Have a backbone when facing as Gira-

"When you were first accepted for the role, what did the Director and Producer tell you about Gira's character?"

Sakai: When all the cast members got together for the first time, we were given all our materials, and I spoke with Director (Kazuya) Kamihoriuchi, who told me, "Be yourself when playing Gira." At first, I didn't really understand it, but as filming progressed, I slowly began to understand what he meant. Gira is very genuine with his emotions. When he's mad, he's mad, when he's sad, he's sad, and his facial expressions are distinct, so I interpreted it in my own way, by acting honestly, and even now, I'm still mindful of that when performing.

"Gira's brother and former king of Shugoddam, Racules Husty, thought of his citizens as tools, and while it was meant to oppose him, Gira sometimes called himself, "The evil king." What are your thoughts on this?"

Sakai: I think it's something that comes out unexpectedly, like when my emotions start to overflow, or when I have something I want to hide, but my personality makes me unable to lie. It's also the same for when I want to motivate myself.

"Is it difficult switching between that and regular Gira?"

Sakai: It was difficult. Director Kamihoriuchi gave me detailed instructions on the emotional flow of going from regular to evil, and then from evil to regular, and I'd practice alot even after going home.

"You seem to do alot of preparation before you start filming."

Sakai: Yeah. I think it's important to spend time going over the script in order to get into the role. I imagine everything from, "Why is Gira in this place?," "What types of food did Gira eat growing up?," "What kinds of kids does he spend time with, and how does he play with them?" By doing so, I feel that I can easily get into the role.

"You have a unique way of delivering lines, it's abit literary, isn't it?"

Sakai: I looked up things in the dictionary, like the meaning of, "One tree, one plant"* (laughs). But, while it's important to understand the meaning, I also think it's important to know who Gira's speaking to and with what kind of emotion, so I try to be aware of that. (*Japanese idiom)

"It's been about six months since filming began. Are there any areas where you feel Gira has grown?"

Sakai: Recently, I became more aware that I'm king. As king, Gira struggles with what he should be doing going forward, but I feel that he's grown compared to the first episode. I've learned alot from my conflicts with the other kings, such as with Yanma (Gast) and Hymeno (Ran), and while I haven't changed at my core, I'm gradually becoming more mature.

"Once more, when playing the role, what do you consider to be the most important features of Gira's character?"

Sakai: He's the type of person who's straightforward and expresses his emotions more than the other kings, so that's probably the most important thing I'm conscious of. When I'm happy, I look happy, when I'm mad, I look mad…and so on. I myself am not the type of person to express my emotions very much, so I try to be conscious of raising my "gears" 2-3 times to get as close to Gira as I can.

"As filming progressed, did you feel more comfortable being Gira?"

Sakai: I think so, recently I felt that I'm finally getting used to it. But, I still have a long way to go. I can do "angry" and "sad," with ease, but "happy" is still difficult for me. The way I feel is something I'm still struggling with.

"Conversely, what do you enjoy about performing?"

Sakai: The times when I can act as myself. When I can communicate well with those around me and think, "This scene will definitely turn out good," I feel very fulfilled. When I can absorb myself into a role, I don't feel strange when I watch my performance in the broadcast. However, there are times where I'll already have something to reflect on during filming, and when I see the broadcast I'll think, "I could have expressed myself better there."

"You get so into your role, that we were surprised to hear that you're the type of person who doesn't show much emotion, so were you surprised when you were chosen to play Gira?"

Sakai: Gira's slightly outgoing, innocent, and straightforward personality may have been something I could've identified with, but even so, it still felt like something I wasn't expecting. Everyone around me is so amazing at their performance, that I wondered, "Was I really the right person for this role?" At the time, I really felt this way.

"At the time of this book's publication, episode 26 will have aired, but please tell us about any memorable scenes or lines."

Sakai: The scene with Racules in episode 20. Gira's objective since the first episode has been to defeat Racules, but it was very difficult to maintain that objective throughout those 20 episodes. In this episode, Gira says to Racules, "I'll surrender if you apologize to everybody and become a king who'll work to protect them." When I said that line, I perfected it after thinking back on the events from the first episode, so it's a scene that I'm very attached to. Furthermore, It was also a turning point for us because (Masato) Yano-san, who plays Racules, would be stepping away from filming.

"Do you think that the talent of Yano-san was a big part of the reason for that scene turning out good?"

Sakai: I've really learned alot from him. We've worked together on other productions in the past, he's been a great help to me in my private life, and of course, he's consulted with me alot on set. To me, he's like a big brother I can rely on.

"How's the action in the scenes where you fight without transforming?"

Sakai: About a day before filming, Action Director (Watanabe) Jun-san gives us a chance to practice in the studio. I'm not that good at action, so if I don't practice, I might have a hard time later. The sword is also heavy, so the action scenes were already difficult. I'm going to do my best at improving my sword fighting skills.

"In the movie "Adventure Heaven," which released this past July, there was a scene where you and Shido Nakamura, who played the role of Reiniol, the first king of Shugoddam, had a fight, and so the practicing continued."

Sakai: Once again, by being apart of the Super Sentai series, it's given me the opportunity to experience not only acting, but also action, dubbing, variety and a wide range of other things, I'm very grateful for this. Also, another moment that left an impression on me, was the dialogue with Kuwagon (mechanical lifeform "Shugod" Gira fights alongside) in episode 25. Chatani Kazuyuki-san gave me detailed directions, and through trial and error, shot the scene about 5 or 6 times. At first, I was saying my lines unconventionally, but the Director told me to just perform it from the heart. The Director then encouraged me to add inflection to my lines. By changing my attitude, I was able to really get into the scene, and I felt a good response with this change, so it's a scene I'd like everyone to watch again.

"In episode 26, Gira's line of, "If you make the first move, you're evil, if you win, it's called justice, none of it even matters. All that really matters is….who can apologize first," was also memorable.

Sakai: As of this interview, we haven't shot that scene yet, but it's a scene that I really treasure. I'm currently thinking of a plan for how to act out the scene where I make the sincere apology.

"It shows that Gira is a person truly worthy of being king."

Sakai: It shows the size of Gira's capability, doesn't it? I think Gira's grown in this respect compared to the beginning of the series.

"Also, for a time, Gira often wore disguises to hide the fact he survived, were any of them memorable?"

Sakai: It would have to be the pillbug looking "Pilltaxi" suit I wore in episode 15. As I said in my dialog, it really was super hot to wear (laughs). The filming took place during the time of season where either short sleeves or long sleeves were appropriate, but first, I had to wear yellow tights, 2 down jackets on top, carry a heavy shell on my back, and put on goggles and headphones…..It was very hot and I also had to do action scenes, so while it was alot of fun, it was also pretty difficult (laughs).

-Moving straight ahead to create a "Good Country!-

"Next, please tell us about your impressions of the other kings. Let's start with Yanma."

Sakai: I have the most scenes of conflict with Yanma, but, he's also my partner. Aoto Watanabe (who plays Yanma), also puts his emotions into his performance, which then turns on my "switch," and allows me to give it my all. Gira is usually pretty direct, but I think he's most direct with Yanma. It feels like we're alittle special. When Gira rushes to Yanma's side in episode 17, it made me think that we share a very passionate friendship.

"By the way, how do you think Gira feels when Yanma calls him "Octomush"?"

Sakai: I don't think he has any complaints (laughs). If anything, it makes me think, "Ah! He called for me!" I guess it feels the same as being called "Gira" normally. Currently, being called "Octomush" has become normal. That's why I was alittle surprised when Yanma said "Gira" in episode 17, even though Gira wasn't around.

"Please also tell us about Hymeno."

Sakai: I often clash with Hymeno as well. In episode 14, when Hymeno was about to go down a slightly different path as king, Gira strongly says, "Is this the face you want your people to see?" However, from an objective view, I feel that Gira is treated like a toy by Hymeno (laughs). I'm sure Gira doesn't think anything of it, but from my point of view, it's an interesting relationship.

"What about Rita Kaniska?"

Sakai: I think Rita is the one Gira respects the most. Of course, everyone else also respects them. The scene in episode 5 where they pass judgment saying, "If I say he's not guilty, he's not guilty!," it was so cool that I got goosebumps. They're the opposite of Gira in terms of personality, but from Gira's point of view, they're an elder like figure who looks out for him. We haven't had many one on one scenes together, so I hope there'll be more in the future.

"Continuing on, please tell us about Kaguragi Dybowski."

Sakai: Regarding him, the way Kaguragi was towards the end of episode 15 left a strong impression on me. The concern Kaguragi has for his sister and Toufu makes him choose to side with Racules and, by extension, the Bugnarak, despite his true beliefs. The scene where Gira asks, "Isn't your heart crying?" was really memorable. Kaguragi is often misunderstood because he won't show his true feelings easily, but Gira tries to see the good in him and appears to trust him. The scene in episode 18, where Gira secretly communicated with Kaguragi behind the other king's backs, was also a wonderful one. Not just Kaguragi, but the scenes where each king showed their emotions left a lasting impression on me.

"The powerup item for KuwagataOhger, the Ohger Crown, was stolen from Racules and given to Gira, suggesting that Kaguragi also trusts Gira."

Sakai: That's right. At first glance, the relationship between the kings may seem surface level, but I feel that they've gradually started trusting each other. I thought that although the characters were different, they all faced the same direction. When I think back on it, my impression of everyone might be similar due to how Gira treats everyone the same (laughs). But, the good thing about Gira is that he doesn't change depending on the person. However, I think the way I treat Jeramie (Brasieri) is alittle different from the others. He's got a boyish spirit and is a character loved by everyone around him, so I think we share a similar character, almost like we're, "A couple of bad boys." He's alittle different from the other kings, and I expect that their relationship will become even more heated in the future.

"We'd also like to ask about your feelings towards Racules, who you've been fighting. You must have mixed feelings…."

Sakai: For me, I wasn't told about the kind of relationship they had as children. Gira is said to have little memories of those days, so it would be better if he didn't know. I'm trying to imagine if Gira was told anything by Racules, so I'm looking forward to finding out the answers to these questions in the future.

"Also, you're often able to perform with children, such as Kogane and Boone, who grew up in the same orphanage as Gira, please tell us what you keep in mind with them."

Sakai: I think it's important to have the same point of view as children. I'd make me happy if Gira's attitude was that he wanted to have fun with the children from the same perspective. The stance of wanting to have fun together from the same perspective is something that Director Kamihoriuchi told me from the beginning of the series, so I'd like to push that point further.

"Do you think there's anything about the other 5 cast members that you would actually consider to be kingly?"

Sakai: Watanabe (Yanma) has a manly spirit, which is really similar with Yanma in that respect. When we stop by a convenience store, he'll buy something for me without me knowing, and he'll do it without hesitation. He's the type who takes his acting very seriously, which I also think is really cool. When we watched "All Rush" (pre broadcast screenings) together, he'd sometimes reflect saying, "I wish I did more of this." I think he's a really passionate person. Erika-chan (Hymeno) is someone who pays close attention to her surroundings. I admire her for her thoughtfulness. Her demeanor is beautiful, and I think she's the perfect fit for the role of Hymeno. I think Yuzuki-chan (Rita) is way different from Rita (laughs). She's very approachable and mindful of her surroundings. Both Erika-chan and Yuzuki-chan are very mature, and good at being able to see the whole picture. Yuzuki-chan is also the youngest member of the main cast! Kaku-san (Kaguragi) is accommodating, offers advice, and livens up the scene. He's like a father to us, gently embracing us all with kindness. Finally, Masashi (Jeramie) didn't come off very Jeramie like at first, but lately, he's been smiling all the time and is very charming, similar to the kingly side of Jeramie. I feel that everyone has elements in their personal lives that fit the characters they play.

"Starting in September, we'll finally be entering the new chapter, Sakai-san, please give a yell of support to the current Gira!"

Sakai: Now that he's the king of Shugoddum, I think he'll have a stronger sense of responsibility for the country. I'm looking forward to seeing how Gira will deal with the other king's conflicts and the various situations that the children will face. Gira's idea of a "Good Country" is one where, "The king protects his citizens, and everyone protects those who are important to them." I believe that this goal is an expression of Gira's humanity, and I hope that he'll keep it in mind as he moves straight ahead.

_

Watanabe Aoto (Yanma Gast) Interview

-The name "Hymeno" is a privilege for Yanma only-

"What kind of character did you feel Yanma was when you read the script?"

Watanabe: My first thought was, "This guy, I think he's a really cool man!" I've always admired men who take the initiative and lead others. Yanma shows off his cool side, but is also the type of person who can expose his weaknesses. That's why those around him want to help out. I remember thinking that the role was very appealing.

"Speaking of, Yanma's main characteristic is his pompadour hair style."

Watanabe: Actually, it wasn't going to be a pompadour in the beginning, but the Director, makeup artist and I came up with the decision. At first, I suggested a perm, with a "wet" look, but they wanted something edgier, so, they started trimming my sides more and more, until we ended up with the style you see now (laughs).

"Compared to the start of filming, have you discovered any new aspects of Yanma that you find appealing, or do you feel that you've grown?"

Watanabe: At this point, I really feel that he's trying to keep his cool image. Starting with Gira, he also seems to have a good relationship with Jeramie and Kaguragi, and I think it's because Yanma's willing to open up and talk with them. Don't dismiss your friends, but make sure to express your own opinions. With that kind of attitude, I feel the respect for each and every one of them. I also really like the distance that Yanma gives when interacting with someone.

"At the time of this book's publication, episode 26 will have aired, but, please tell us about any memorable scenes or lines."

Watanabe: There are alot of scenes I like….First, there's episode 2, where I say to the people of N'kosopa, "You guys, just shut up already and follow me. I'm not going to lose to anyone!!," there's also the scene in episode 7, where Hymeno reveals her past to Yanma. The scene in episode 10, where Legend King-Ohger arrives after the passionate exchange with Shiokara (Yanma's retainer), I really liked as well. Also, there's the wacky scene in episode 11, where they discussed how to reveal to the people that Gira, who was supposed to be dead, was actually alive. Ah, also! I liked the scene in episode 14, when Hymeno suspects that Jeramie's the one who caused the "Wrath of God" (disaster from 15 years ago), and Yanma says, "Things'll become clear when you finally meet Jeramie." Instead of being like, "I'll help you," he's more, "I'll throw you a rope, but it's up to you with what you do with it," leaving it up to her to decide, which I thought was very cool and totally like Yanma. I also like the scene in episode 17, where Gira saves Yanma, who's falling apart, and then the whoopie cushion scene in episode 19, where Yanma and Jeramie talk to each other, and they’re both smiling and laughing together, I really liked that one! It was the first time where I felt that he and Jeramie were facing the same direction.

"What do you keep in mind when playing Yanma?"

Watanabe: Before filming, the Director told me about my eyes. He said that if I remained as I was, they wouldn't have any "sharpness" to them. I watched yankii movies by myself, and since Yanma is a character who leads people, I wondered, "What kind of person would people want to follow?" I also read books and biographies written by people who've held leader positions. Through this process, I've slowly developed a sense of, "The coolness of someone who leads others." Now, I'm in the process of putting out what I've been studying.

"Like what for instance?"

Watanabe: Usually when Yanma talks to people, he'll consciously turn his head at an angle to them. He'll look away and stay calm, and only makes eye contact when the moment is right. I'm especially careful of the timing for when I face the person and when I make eye contact. I think this is an important factor in expressing what I consider to be Yanma's, "distance between people".

"What are some of the challenges you face when performing?"

Watanabe: The explanatory lines…there's so many Katakana characters. But, that's pretty much it. At other times, my jacket would fall off my shoulders while I was doing action scenes (laughs). Ah, speaking of the action! Yanma's pretty weak in fights, but I myself want to play the role of a more cool Yanma, so I'm alittle torn. In the movie "Adventure Heaven," which was released in July, there was an action scene between Rita and Yanma. During filming, Yanma was being overtaken by a swarm of Sanagim (Bugnarak soldiers), but, when I looked at Rita, they looked so freaking cool beating them up. Honestly, I was abit jealous.

"So you had a hard time with the explanatory lines, huh? There are many proper nouns unique to the show, so did you struggle with the intonation, especially in the beginning?"

Watanabe: It was difficult! I struggled the most with the accent for "Shugod."

"For Hymeno's name, should it be pronounced with an accent on the "Hy" or should it be pronounced normally?"

Watanabe: Actually, only Yanma's allowed to say it normally. Everyone else is told to put the accent on the "Hy". It's a privilege only I have!

"When do you most enjoy playing Yanma?"

Watanabe: For me, with the more serious scenes, I think I enjoy them more when they're over. As a citizen of N'kosopa, I also become nervous with all the extra cast members, but at the same time, it makes me feel excited. I approached these things with the mindset of, "Yanma's someone who brought these people together," but, when I walked down the red carpet with about 300 people all staring at me, I once again felt excited and the tension started to rise.

-Whatever choice you make, choose the one you won't regret-

"Now, I'd like to know what kind of impressions Watanabe-san has about the characters that surround Yanma. First off is Gira."

Watanabe: This can be said for all the kings, but I feel that he has his own sense of justice. I think that Gira's desire to protect people, even at the cost of his life, is stronger than others. He played the role of an "evil king" to make it happen. Yanma might laugh at Gira's way of doing things, but from my point of view, I think it's very cute. I mean, he's got a cute face, doesn't he? (laughs). There's something sparkly about his moments of "nothingness," and I think it grabs the hearts of both men and women. Even when he's doing something ridiculous, he has an atmosphere that makes the people around him want to support him, which is very much in tune with being a main character.

"What do you think about Hymeno?"

Watanabe: In my opinion, among all the characters in the show, aside from Yanma, I'm fond of Hymeno. For me, I love cool female characters. Furthermore, the selfish ones are the strongest of them all, right?! I also really like the relationship between Yanma and Hymeno. When Hymeno says something like, "you lack elegance," I tend to rebel against her, but I feel like we recognize each other's beliefs. Even when they're fighting, I don't think they feel awkward, I think that they're just enjoying themselves.

"In the beginning, Yanma called her, "Hymeno-chan," but before we knew it, he just calls her "Hymeno."

Watanabe: Actually, he hasn't called her by her name since episode 3, when he called her "Hymeno-chan." He did sometimes call her "Princess," though. So, I kept waiting to see when he would call her by her name next. And then, in episode 17, he said her name for the first time in such a long time, and it was also the first time he called out to her! It was the scene where Yanma relies on Hymeno, and I said to Erika-chan, "It's finally here." I thought it was really passionate that he called out to her for the first time in such a situation. I feel that Hymeno and Yanma are subconsciously acting in a way that'll make them like each other. For instance, in episode 7, I wonder if Yanma's answer to Hymeno's question about her past could've been more heartfelt because it was Hymeno. For Yanma on the other hand, when he asked Hymeno for a favor, I really like how she always smiles and helps me. In the beginning of the story, there were scenes depicted in which it seemed that Yanma had a crush on Hymeno, but I hope that in the end, Hymeno will fall in love with Yanma. That's my wish, but when I told Erika-chan about it, she said, "No, it won't happen that way. Because Hymeno is becoming more mature, in the end, Yanma will fall for Hymeno once again." (laughs).

"(laughs). So, what about Rita?"

Watanabe: For Yanma, Rita is the most distant of the 5. That's why Rita's the only one he hasn't called by name yet. I think for Yanma, it may have to do with Rita's position as chief judge. He has respect for them, so he doesn't want to interfere too much in the decisions they make. However, when dealing with them as a person, I think Yanma's the type of person who says whatever he wants. That's why he said, "So annoying!," when Rita screams in episode 19. I personally think that since Yanma can make friends with anyone, that I'm sure he can make friends with Rita as well. Still, he doesn't know much about Rita's personality, so if he can just break down some of their barriers, then surely…..Well, I do wish Rita would atleast be alittle more honest (laughs). But, Rita just goes at their own pace.

"Next, tell us about Kaguragi."

Watanabe: For me, I think that Kaguragi-san and Racules-san are characters that are most likely popular among adults. When I auditioned for the show, there was the script for the scene in the first episode, where Gira and Racules confront each other. At that time, I very much empathized with Racules. I'm only in my mid twenties, but even I know that you can't live by empty words only. I'm the type of person who has a hard time trusting people 100% right away, so I feel that the way Racules-san and Kaguragi-san go about politics makes the most sense. Among other things, Kaguragi-san's appeal is in that he's willing to dirty his hands to protect his family and his citizens.

"What are your impressions of Kaguragi from Yanma's perspective?"

Watanabe: Even as Yanma, I don't think he'd deny the way that Kaguragi-san does things. In episode 19, When he said to Kaguragi-san, "I guess I can trust you after all," is because he doesn't do things out of self interest, and that he's more concerned with protecting Toufu than the way it appears. I think Yanma can trust him. He was considered a traitor by many of those around him, but his actions are based on his beliefs. I think Yanma recognizes these aspects of Kaguragi.

"What about Jeramie?"

Watanabe: Jeramie's real cute, huh? Although, he's abit too pretentious for my tastes (laughs). In episode 12, Jeramie's origins were revealed. I think Yanma also feels that he's cute in that, even though he's been alive for 2,000 years, he still gets pulled around by everyone around him. Furthermore, there's the scene in episode 19, where Yanma and Jeramie fistbump, and I think that Yanma wanted to have an equal relationship with Jeramie at that time. So, I was mindful of that when I played the part of Yanma getting angry for a moment in response to Jeramie's words. Also, Jeramie's really strong. So, I hope Yanma can be in a position to guide him in using that strength.

"Do you think there's anything about the other 5 cast members that you would actually consider to be kingly?"

Watanabe: They all have their own wonderful qualities. Taisei may seem like an innocent airhead, but he's also got a manly spirit. Erika-chan is someone who always thinks from the perspective of those around her. She's dignified, in a good way, and that's something I want to learn from her. Yuzuki-chan is the same, she has a keen sense of observation. For example, when she sees someone who appears to be in trouble, she tries to move towards that person to help them. It's wonderful that she's not only able to anticipate, but is also able to act properly. Kaku-san is very experienced! He's the ideal adult man. I want to be like Kaku-san someday. Finally, Masashi is very friendly. Before I realized it, we became very close. I seem to have ended up talking about what I like about the 5 of them, rather than what I think is kingly about them (laughs).

"We'd also like to ask about Shiokara, Yanma's retainer."

Watanabe: My relationship with Shiokara is also a heated one. Yanma used to be a loner, but Shiokara accepts him and has stuck around ever since. They've spent alot of time together, so he's someone Yanma trusts the most. For me, I'm very happy and grateful to have someone like Shiokara by my side. He works for me, coordinating our foreign diplomacy. And, Shiokara's someone who can speak up for Yanma, so in a way, he also acts as my "brakes."

"If you think about it, Shiokara seems to have great communication skills…"

Watanabe: That's right. That's why I think his role is to act as a connection between Yanma and other people. For example, if it were just Yanma and his citizens, there would be alot of conflict, but with Shiokara intervening, they can move things in the right direction.

"In the future, are there any situations or scenes that you'd like to play as Yanma?"

Watanabe: I have so many that I've been writing them down in my phone's memo pad (laughs). The first, would be an awakening scene. I think it's okay for someone to lose sight of themselves. If Yanma were to switch places in the scene where he says to Hymeno, "The grief of losing someone, it's a luxury I've never had," he'd probably find himself in a situation where his rationality is thrown out and his eyes are opened. Another scene would be where Shiokara is fighting, and while everyone else is worried about him, only Yanma is watching and laughing. I thought it'd be nice if the person closest to Shiokara believed in him and watches over him, and so something in Shiokara would also awaken…I think that'd be a good scene. Wouldn't it be real passionate if we could draw out Shiokara's strength even more because Yanma believes in him?! I want to try doing it!

"As we enter the new chapter, please give a yell of support for the current Yanma."

Watanabe: I want you to stick to your own style until the end, even if there are many challenges ahead. It's okay if it's different from what Yanma thinks now. For example, right now he’s saying, "I don't flatter or bow down to anyone," but when the time comes that Yanma thinks it would be better to do so, he may lower his head. I think that's just how you grow. Whatever choice you make, I hope it's one you won't regret. From now on, let's show off another new side to Yanma!

_

Murakami Erika (Hymeno Ran) Interview

-I can say, "Thank you," with all my heart-

"At the time of being cast, what kind of character was described to you?"

Murakami: The first thing I was told, was that Hymeno's beloved parents had lost their lives. I was asked to create a role based on this fact. So, I didn't ask about the specifics of her personality, rather, I developed the character of Hymeno while acting. Hymeno's character introduction on the official site states, "Extremely selfish" and, "Has no hesitation in saving someone's life." I think being selfish means to have a strong will and a strong heart that won't be discouraged by anything. With that, I think it comes from the frustration of, "I wasn't able to save my parents." The reason why Hymeno was able to move forward with determination, and not give up no matter what happens, is most likely because she's overcome the sadness of losing her parents by herself. So, when I play Hymeno, I value having that kind of backbone the most, and it became a very important point of reference in my interpretation of Hymeno.

"Compared to the beginning of filming, do you feel that Hymeno has grown in any way?"

Murakami: It would be the fact that she's started to say thank you from the heart. Hymeno has a desire for revenge due to her parents being killed when she was younger, but I think she's lived most of her life while hiding those negative emotions. But, the more I came into contact with kings from other countries, the more I had to face it. For example, in episode 14, after learning that the animation, "Together with Moffun," was created by the people of Ishabana to cheer up Hymeno, who ascended the throne at such a young age, there's a scene where Hymeno says, "Thank you," to a girl, one of her citizens. Of course, as the queen of Ishabana, I'm sure that she had much to thank her people for, but I felt that her "thank you" at that time was a sincere one that brought her back to her original mindset, which she had forgotten. I think that's where Hymeno grew the most. Also, in episode 7, Yanma tells Hymeno that, "The grief of losing someone, it's a luxury I never had," and I think that was a scene where Hymeno realized alot of things. It's discoveries like this, through the other kings, that allow her to move forward again. These kinds of changes wouldn't be possible if Hymeno was all alone. Also, no one believed her when she said that her parents hadn't died from the disaster, but were instead murdered, except for Rita, who was the only one who believed her. Episode 16 proved that the "Wrath of God" was a deliberate act. As the story progresses, Hymeno, who would've never relied on others, came to rely on everyone at important points. At the beginning of filming, I was thinking mainly about how to make Hymeno's character stand out, and how to show the relationship between the kings, but, as Hymeno has grown, I feel that I've come to grasp the role in a deeper way.

"In episode 16, Hymeno gives Rita a "Premium Chibi Moffun" as a thank you present.

Murakami: I think she was just really happy that Rita relied on her to analyze the poison, and that she opened up to them and told them about her past. Hymeno grew up with alot of love from her parents, and I believe that she really wants to interact with alot of different people. That's why her interaction with Rita reminded me of my own childhood and made me feel nostalgic. While she's a strong woman, I feel that Hymeno must have often felt lonely.

"In the film "Adventure Heaven," which was released in July, the kings visited the Kingdom of Death, and Hymeno was reunited with her parents. During filming, did you ever remember your own parents and call them?"

Murakami: I did! I talked alot with my parents before shooting that exact scene. We didn't talk about anything special, we just had a casual conversation. But, I think what Hymeno wants the most, is the daily life she had when her parents were still alive. So, while I can talk to my parents whenever I want, I imagined what it would be like if I couldn't do that anymore, and developed Hymeno's feelings from there. So basically, I tried not to decide too much for each scene in my head, but rather, I tried to decide how I would act by my movements and feeling the atmosphere of the scene.

"Was that the way you approached the role from the beginning?"

Murakami: No, in the beginning, I did things my own way. I would often come up with a plan and then go to the shoot. However, I thought that I could make the performance better if we all worked together on it, as things can change when you're working on it with someone else. I realized this in episode 17, in the scene where Yanma said to me, "I need your help to evacuate the people of N'kosopa. You're not so heartless to leave the wounded behind, are you?" When I read the script alone, I thought that Yanma would say it like he was exhausted from battle. But, in reality, he said it with a very relaxed smile on his face. I thought, "I see. I'm surprised that Yanma would do such a thing here!" I responded to him with a smile of nuance, as if saying, "You know I'm not that kind of a girl, right?" I'm sure that I wouldn't have been able to do that if I had perfected the performance by myself.

"With that, she said that she's now able to perform with more composure than when she first started."

Murakami: That's right. At first, as I read the script, I thought about each line with, "Why am I saying this here?" I would think about each line and write various things into the script. However, I thought that if I kept doing that, I'd have a hard time in the future, and that if I didn't think too much about it, I'd be more flexible if something different from what I had anticipated happened on set. In fact, my stance has changed, and I felt much more at ease when I went to one of the film sites without any script.

"When do you enjoy playing Hymeno the most?"

Murakami: There are many times. For example, in episode 16, where I tell Rita, "Thank you," and I happily hum as I leave was really fun to perform. Also, the scene where Hymeno becomes startled from when Rita screams, "Aaaaah!!," is also funny due to my amusing reaction. I like performances that are dialogue heavy, so I'll read the script, and imagine things that haven't taken form yet as I go to the set, and when I get there I think, "Ah, this person is going to do this here! Well then, I'll try to get in on it." It's really nice seeing new developments happening all the time.

"On the other hand, are there any struggles when playing Hymeno?"

Murakami: Hymeno has dealt with many difficulties in the past, so she's not easily fazed. That's why I've had a very hard time with more emotional scenes. In the film, there's a part in which I had to hold back tears during the scene where I say goodbye to my parents. If it were actually me, I would definitely start to cry, but Hymeno has the strength to endure it. During those times, it's difficult for me to distinguish between the emotions of myself and those of Hymeno.

-I sometimes offer my ideas about Hymeno's makeup-

"Hymeno's elegant behavior is appealing, but is she influenced by Murakami-san as well?"

Murakami: My grandmother was very strict about etiquette, so I was often told that I, "had elegance." In episode 14, I said to Jeramie, "You, just reveal the truth, and nothing more!" But, I've never said "You"* to anyone, so, how was I supposed to say it?! I was really worried. But, I thought that Hymeno could say it, since she's a strong woman. The more I understand Hymeno, the more I realize that she's a stronger person than I thought. My goal was, "Have a strong heart, and be someone who isn't discouraged by the smallest things," and I feel like I'm getting closer to that by playing Hymeno. In the past, when it came to acting, I often felt sad and thought, "I should've done that more like this." But now, even when I'm feeling down, I can think, "Alright, how can I reflect and put it to use next time?" (*she uses an informal way of saying "You")

"I admire women like Hymeno. She's strong, but cute."

Murakami: She really is! Hymeno is selfish, but I think being selfish is wonderful. In this generation, I think there are many people who can't say what they want, because they feel that they have to conform to their surroundings. If those people can gain even alittle bit of strength and courage from watching Hymeno, it would be a true honor for me as an actor.

"Hymeno's costumes, hair and makeup are just like those of a princess. Do the costumes and makeup turn on your "switch" as Hymeno?"

Murakami: Rather than the costumes, I feel that I look the most like a queen when I sit on my throne. There are alot of accessories around me, so I get tips on how to hold a teacup and do other gestures. Also, when it comes to the makeup, I sometimes suggest colors for my lipstick, eye shadow, and blush. I'll sometimes even bring my own cosmetics to the set.

"What are some key points of Hymeno's makeup?"

Murakami: I try to keep a good balance in the use of colors. If the eyes are darker, the lips should be lighter, and so, if the lips are darker, then the eyes should be lighter. What I'm most particular about is always having, "Curled eyelashes." When you draw Hymeno in fan art, I think it looks more like Hymeno if the eyelashes are quickly raised up!

"At the time of this book's publication, episode 26 will have aired, but please tell us about any memorable scenes or lines."

Murakami: The line in episode 21, where I say to Gira, "What's wrong with being selfish?," is catchy, and it's my favorite because it suits Hymeno so well. Also, when I sensed that Scorpi (God Scorpion) had feelings for Kabutan (God Kabuto), she says, "Are you really just friends?," and I liked how Hymeno was sensitive towards a young maiden's heart. Also, in episode 25, where she says, "I always hate it when the flowers fall. But, if I think of it as a way to scatter the seeds so more flowers can bloom, then I can accept it." That line made me happy to see Hymeno grow so much.

"Next, please tell us about your impressions of the other 5 kings. First is Gira."

Murakami: At first, I thought Gira was the type of person who would be very noisy, but when I saw how he behaved himself during the meal scene, I felt that he gave off an aura of someone who was more than just an ordinary person. In the scene where she first meets Gira, Hymeno says, "I'm interested in you," and touches Gira's chin. I remember being surprised because we had only just started filming (laughs).

"Next, tell us about Yanma."

Murakami: Hymeno is a young lady with a rich upbringing, while Yanma is a yankii who's risen up from the streets of poverty. They're complete opposites, but they have a strange relationship in that they can share some things with each other. In episode 7, when Hymeno talks about her past, Yanma doesn't stand by her, instead, he speaks from a completely different angle. But, I believe that Yanma's statement of, "That kind of consolation doesn't help people grow," was said out of kindness.

"What's your impression of Rita?"

Murakami: Rita is a neutral person, someone who attacks everything with logic, so at first, there were scenes where I was made to feel as if, "Someone I don't like very much is here." But, as I got to know them better, I found that they looked directly at Hymeno and took her more seriously than anyone else. Rita is someone who can stand by others. The back to back fight with Hymeno is my favorite scene with Rita.

"How about Kaguragi Dybowski?"

Murakami: For Kaguragi, I got the impression that he was a very hospitable, lively and pleasant guy, but, he's also deceitful and had ulterior motives, so I couldn't trust him. Even in episode 13, there's a line where Hymeno looks annoyed when she sees Kaguragi and says, "Why are you (here)…?" That foreshadowing was beautifully revealed in episode 19! You can't tell people just from looking at the surface….

"Please also tell us about Jeramie Brasieri."

Murakami: I got the impression that he was a, "Strange spider man," who didn't really know what he wanted to do. However, when he finally opened up, I realized that he just wanted to get along with everyone. From Hymeno's point of view, it's like, "Why are you doing things in such a roundabout way?!" (laughs). In episode 14, Hymeno doubted Jeramie, saying, "Are you the one who caused the Wrath of God?!," but he kept saying, "I want you to read between the lines." If you just speak properly, I'll get the message. But, it's probably because he's never been able to engage with other people before. I find his clumsiness abit endearing, so I can't just leave him be.

"Do you think there's anything about the other 5 cast members that you would consider to be kingly?"

Murakami: One day, I was on standby for my scene, but due to time constraints, we didn't film it. I was feeling alittle sad about it, but Taisei-kun encouraged me by saying, "Don't worry!" I thought his casual concern for others was like a king. For Aoto-kun…when we had just started filming, there was a time when I was feeling depressed because I felt that I couldn't act well. When I went to the filming site the next day, Aoto-kun said, "I'll give you some candy." That sort of indirect kindness is both heartwarming and comforting.

"Looking through Murakami-san's SNS, we can see that she and Yuzuki Hirakawa-san, who plays Rita, go out together on their days off and seem to get along well."

Murakami: That's right. There are separate dressing rooms for the men and women, so Yuzuyan (Hirakawa) and I spend all our time together, even when we're not filming. I sometimes call her "YuzuYuzu." She's someone who can honestly and clearly say what she thinks, and I think that's a strength similar to a king.

How about Kaguragi's Kaku So-san, and Jeramie's Masashi Ikeda-san?

Murakami: Kaku-san is the oldest of the cast members, and I can tell that he's looking out for all of us with a sense of responsibility. He plays the kind of king who surrounds everyone. Ikeda-kun is always smiling and laughing at my boring jokes. The same goes for Kaku-san, and their kindness makes me feel like they're kings with a big heart.

"Are there any situations as Hymeno that you'd like to play in the future?"

Murakami: After filming the movie, I felt there were situations where I was like, "Hymeno is strong, so I can't let these things discourage her." I would like to try something like, "(through tears) I don't want to ruin my mascara." (laughs).

"Since we're about to enter the new chapter, please give a yell of support to the current Hymeno!"

Murakami: Hymeno~! You're not only selfish, but you've also got a cute side to you. I don't know what the new chapter will look like yet, but, as long as you stay the way you are and walk the path you believe in, I'm sure you'll be fine!

_

Hirakawa Yuzuki (Rita Kaniska) Interview

-Rita is calm and quiet, but is the opposite of "cold"-

"At the time of being chosen for the role and filming began, how did the staff explain the character to you?"

Hirakawa: Since the time of the audition, I was told that Rita would be, "A character who's calm, quiet, and fazed by nothing." The word, "Immovable," came up while I was reading the script and having discussions with Pilot Director, Kazuya Kamihoriuchi-san. Also, they mentioned that the character doesn't show many emotional highs or lows. As the international chief judge, they always take a step back and look at things objectively, but, this wasn't dictated by the production team, I thought it'd be better to do that if I were Rita, so they adopted it. Even at times when I'm with everyone during filming, I try to keep one step back.

"For your role Hirakawa-san, what kind of character do you think Rita is?"

Hirakawa: Rita has many faces, including the face they show to everyone and the face they show when they're alone. At a glance, they may look like an inhumane and cold person, but, they scream alot and talk with their Moffun plushies to clear their mind, and among the 6 kings, I feel that they're surprisingly humane. But, on the other hand, they also have a role as chief judge, and there are times when they have to stand in front of a crowd as king. Even in our normal lives, there's a sharp contrast between when we're working and when we're having fun. I'm sure that Rita feels that way too. Because Rita has so many sides to them, it's easy for viewers to relate to each side and way of life, and I think that's why we've received so much positive feedback. Furthermore, Rita often confronts people with the harsh truth of their situations, but it's proof that they've seen and dealt with them properly. If there's even abit of doubt, they investigate with their own eyes and legs.

"Compared to when you first started filming, what are some new things you've discovered about Rita recently, and how do you feel they've grown?"

Hirakawa: When we first started filming, we only received the scripts for 2 episodes, so I though, "What's going to happen to Rita?" In episode 5, which is Rita's first main episode, the scene where they talk with Moffun I had already performed during the audition, so I an idea that such a scene would be included. As I read the scripts and acted in episode 5 and so on, my image of Rita finally solidified in my mind. Thinking about it again, I've recently started to show my own personality in front of everyone.

"The scene with Morfonia in episode 10 was particularly memorable."

Hirakawa: That's the scene where, through Moffun, Morfonia said to me, "If the world's going to end, why not ask for someone's help just once? Moffun wants to stay together with Rittan." At that time, I think the feeling of, "I have to tell you what I'm thinking," developed within Rita. As a result of having the courage to show their true feelings to Morfonia, I felt that they had become less of a barrier to those around them. It was a moment where I felt that Rita had grown by taking a step forward on their own.

"You mentioned earlier about your position. What else do you keep in mind when playing Rita?"

Hirakawa: Rita's face is usually covered by the collar, so there's alot that can be conveyed by the way they look at you, the way they blink, and how they open their eyes. For those reasons, I pay extra attention to eye contact. Since the only source of information about facial expressions is through the eyes, even a quick glance at someone conveys information about how you feel towards them. The same goes for the movements of the body as a whole, but I'm still very conscious of the eyes. This is a character whose imagination grows in the minds of viewers, so I want to make sure they don't get the wrong impressions. And, when I'm speaking as chief judge, I also try to make my words sound compelling. I have a naturally low voice, so in order to make my voice more low pitched and stable, especially when making a verdict, I would lower my voice and make it stronger. The trial scenes are the most difficult, because there's alot of difficult lines (laughs). When I read the script and came across a word that I wouldn't normally use, I'll use a handwriting app on my phone to find out how to read it. I think that if you don't understand the meaning of your lines before saying them, it'll be unconvincing, so that's one of the points I'm working on. In addition, Rita, from their position of neutrality, has many loud, impactful lines in which they declare important things for the countries, such as the "Five Kingdom Alliance," and the trials by combat. I'm mindful of closing scenes like that in a cool way.

"Speaking of voice, the tone of their voice when they're alone in their room was also striking."

Hirakawa: The tension in the room when I was speaking to Moffun was like, "No moooore!," as I had been influenced by the script and felt it was much different at first. But, when I was reading the script the day before filming, Director Kamihoriuchi told me that there was a change in direction (laughs). However, I think the fact that the tension was the same as in the actual broadcast made the scene more surreal and cute. Still, just talking to some plushies is quite a contrast, isn't it? I also enjoy the close up shots. The lines that Rita says to Moffun aren't meant to be sweet, but are instead abit of a lesson. By speaking with Moffun, Rita must be trying to clear their mind. Performing those interactions has become a "switch" for me, and I feel as if I have a small Moffun in my head as well.

"It seems to be very difficult to keep the tension the same, in addition to being required to perform in a slow, almost whispering manner."

Hirakawa: That's right. Also, while men's low voices resonate great, it's abit difficult to make women's low voices resonate. Voices change depending on the condition, so I have to pay attention when making adjustments.

"Another scene that's received alot of attention, are those where your character screams in panic."

Hirakawa: The script said, "Aaaaaah!," so I wasn't sure what to do at first… (laughs). I hadn't really screamed much in any of my previous roles, so when we set up for the shoot, the Director gave me the direction of, "More screaming! more!" This happened before we ate lunch, but during the actual performance after eating, the volume of my voice became much louder. I then realized the importance of food. From then on, whenever my voice became low during filming, the Director would ask me, "Want to eat some food for now?" (laughs). Rita does that outburst when they feel like their head is about to explode, so I guess this too is sort of a "switch." It's normal of Rita to make strange noises in order to calm down. In episode 9, when Rita screamed, Yanma responds with, "Stop that! It's so annoying!" That was actually an adlib by Watanabe-kun, who plays Yanma. It made me very happy!

"What are some of the challenges you face when performing?"

Hirakawa: My visibility is poor. When I check my standing position on set, I can't see the right half of my body. As for the difficulty of my movement, I've been doing this for more than half a year now, so I've gotten used to it. Speaking of getting used to it, I wear boots with a heel of about 10 cm.* They're one of my favorites because of how cool they are. (*alittle under 4 inches)

"When are the times where you feel most comfortable playing the role?"

Hirakawa: The setting and worldview are completely different from the environment in which we actually live, so there are many things that we wouldn't normally be able to do. So, everything's alot of fun. It's also the first time for me to play the role of a judge (laughs). As I mentioned earlier, Rita has many sides, so I play them as if I were playing 4 roles at once. The most enjoyable scenes are those in which they can perform comedic movements. For example, in episode 9, they rush forward with the hilt of their Ohger Calibur to stop Gira's outburst, and in the film, they run towards Yanma with their hands raised. I hope you'll pay attention to the way they're slowly making such movements, even in front of their friends.

-They're calm, but, when they're excited, they're excited!-

"At the time of this book's publication, the episode that will have aired is episode 26, which is the end of the battle with the Bugnarak. Please tell us about any memorable scenes or lines from Rita."

Hirakawa: I was really impressed by episode 16, which dove into Rita's past and their childhood when they became a judge. I also liked that Rita's first exchange with Shiron, who they judged, was connected to the main plot of the story. This was the episode where Rita reaffirmed their resolve and responsibility as king, and strongly vowed, "As king, I will absolutely uphold neutrality and order," so it made me feel even more nervous playing the role. Gokkan is a special country whose citizens are current or ex criminals, so it seems alittle different from the other countries.

"You've had a lot of battles, which one has been the most memorable in terms of action?"

Hirakawa: Hachisuka Yuichi-san, the suit actor who plays PapillonOhger, Rita's transformed form, has been carefully teaching me how to swing a sword and move my feet one by one. Even the smallest movements, like how to hold the sword or the angle of the sword towards the camera, are the parts that he's very particular about, as he watches and guides me from the monitor, he says, "If you do it this way, you'll look cool!"

"We'd like to hear Hirakawa-san's impressions of the characters surrounding Rita. First, please start with Gira."

Hirakawa: He's so straightforward, that it makes me worry. It's really cool that he acts for everyone's sake, even at the cost of his life, but, he also has a boyish cute like feel to him that I think makes him a really lovable character. It's also nice to see him switch from his cute face to a cool kingly face. It's wonderful that he always thinks with everyone in mind.

"How about Yanma?"

Hirakawa: Out of the 6, he's the most wild, and has a manly spirit. When he says, "I'll follow the path I believe in!," I like the way it sounds, it's got a strong feel of passion within its roughness. It might be because he grew up in the slums, and has worked his way up the ranks, but he also has abit of a playful and approachable feel to him. Most of all, his cool attitude of "Follow me," makes me think that he'd definitely make any N'kosopa citizen a fan.

"Continuing on, Hymeno Ran."

Hirakawa: I think everything about her is beautiful and cute. I feel the strength of a woman from Hymeno, and she's the kind of hero that girls admire. She acts selfishly, but it's not for personal gain. It's wonderful that she does it for the sake of protecting others. I also feel the power to keep believing in what I once believed in, and to keep moving forward with it. I also think the fact that she enjoys fashion with her hair, makeup, and constantly changing dresses, is also appealing.

"Next is Kaguragi Dybowski."

Hirakawa: I don't know what he's thinking anymore! (laughs). Kaguragi is always up to something, and I think he's the most unpredictable out of the 6 of us. But, as king, he says he'll, "Get his hands dirty to protect his people," so he really does come off like a nice older brother. He's a man who'll take any side for the sake of his own benefit, so I feel that he's the most important person for Rita to watch out for and to always keep an eye on.

"We'd also like to ask about the sixth warrior, Jeramie Brasieri."

Hirakawa: Jeramie is someone who also has alot, if not more, mysterious parts to him as Kaguragi. He's brought to Gokkan every time something happens, so he has alot of scenes with Rita. I personally don't get what, "Between the lines," Jeramie is saying for us to read (laughs). However, I think he's got some similarities with Rita. I think they can relate to his inability to honestly express his thoughts, and his emotional highs and lows. I think he's the talking type, and the fact that he's so mysterious is interesting.

"Finally, one more person. What do you think about Morfonia, Rita's retainer who really understands them?"

Hirakawa: Although she's someone who always says, "Work is too much trouble…," she's a hard worker, who does what Rita asks her to do quickly and efficiently. I don't think their relationship with her was that close until episode 10, but after that conversation, the way they treated Morfonia changed. For her, she's also changed the way she treats and looks at Rita, and I think she's become more interested in Rita as a person. She's a cute, reliable and a beloved character.

"Do you think there's anything about the other 5 cast members that you would consider to be kingly?"

Hirakawa: I was told that it's uncommon, but this time, all 6 main cast members are over 20 years old. So even though everyone is usually pretty calm, when they're excited, they're excited, just like the kings in the show. When one person messes around, another one joins them, and then another will pick up on it…it's a really peaceful and fun scene to witness (laughs). No matter what I do, there are those who will definitely join me, so I'm grateful for that.

"You're all good friends, aren't you? We've heard that you'll sometimes go out to eat together."

Hirakawa: That's right. We often go out to eat together after filming, and we have alot of fun talking not just about filming, but about casual things too. It's currently pretty rare, but since I'm from Kumamoto, sometimes it's hard for me to understand the intonation of some words in standard Japanese. Furthermore, I was nervous about the intonation of some words we don't usually use, like court terms and the explanatory lines, so I had to ask Watanabe-kun and Kaku-san about them. Then, they'd say something random and unintelligible to confuse me, so I'd always laugh and say, "That's definitely not true, right?!" Also, it's very popular to imitate and speak as the characters on set. If you imitating Racules's name calling, or if you speak in a way that takes alot of time, like Kaguragi, you're sometimes called, "Toufu Ruler" (laughs).

"From now on, do you have any hopes for Rita to develop in the future?"

Hirakawa: Someday, I'd like to take off the collar and talk with my face in front of everyone. Right now, they only take it off in scenes where the other kings aren't around or during battle scenes. Scenes for joking around are also good. I think it'd be really interesting if a character who doesn't usually do silly scenes, actually does some, and I think Rita is the right person for that role. On the other hand, I'll have a sense of responsibility to make it funny, but, I'll be sure to give it my all if my wish comes true!

"We're finally entering the new chapter. Hirakawa-san, please give a yell of support to the current Rita!"

Hirakawa: Just as peace has been restored with the creation of the sixth kingdom, I have a feeling that new enemies will also appear. However, if you have faith in what you believe in, and do what you need to do, I'm sure you'll be able to face the challenges. You have wonderful friends now. Please take a quick breather and do your best!

_

Kaku So (Kaguragi Dybowski) Interview

-Being recognized as a liar makes me happy (laughs)-

"We understand that Kaguragi was meant to be more dark hearted, and to be more of a villain in the initial setting."

Kaku: During the time of the audition, I got the feeling that he not only played tricks, but also cheated others with his words. However, I thought that the type of character that's skillful with words but pushes through with power in the end would suit my style, so I tried to play it in that manner. Later, when I got the role of Kaguragi and filming started, the character wasn't as cruel as initially described, he was always smiling, and was able to overcome any situation with force. I think there was a direction to make him more scary, as if you don't know what he's thinking, but, I got emotionally attached to Kaguragi and decided to make him more interesting, somewhere between "amusing" and "cool", I played the role while thinking that it would make his character come to life more, and that's how I ended up with the image of Kaguragi that you see now. Kamejim, the Bugnarak's Prime Minister, is a dark hearted character who's also a trickster, but, unlike Kamejim, Kaguragi is a more refreshing character. Instead of those around him saying, "(with a frown) He's a bad guy…" it's more like, "(with a look that says: I've been robbed) He's a bad guuuy!"

"As the story progresses, what new aspects of Kaguragi have you discovered?"

Kaku: In episode 8, when Gira and Racules were doing trial by combat, Kaguragi was supposed to give Racules an anesthetic disguised as poison, but, when Hymeno asked him if he had switched them, there was a scene where he turned his head and went, "Ho?" Director (Kyohei) Yamaguchi, who directed episode 8, told me to, "Make it easier to understand," and I did just that, and it was unexpectedly popular on set (laughs). I was worried that I might lose the character of Kaguragi, but the response to the broadcast was positive, and I realized that going in this direction was also acceptable. Episodes 1-5 were a period in which the framework of Kaguragi's character was established, and while the framework we created was important, we didn't want to stray too far from it. However, I thought that if I was too concerned about not wanting to change my original image, I wouldn't be able to expand the scope of my role.

"As the story progresses, we find out that he has a little sister named Suzume."

Kaku: I knew early on that I had a younger sister, and that she was being held in Shugoddam as a hostage, but I wasn't told how she ended up there. In episode 15, the scene where he talks to Suzume for the first time was depicted, but, if I had been acting in the image I had up until episode 5, I might have thought, "Is it okay for me to act so silly with my little sister?" I was able to act easily after playing the unusual role of Kaguragi for so long, and (Mami) Kamura-chan, who plays Suzume, is an excellent actor and is good at adlibs, so we can act and joke around with each other in a positive manner. I was led to believe that Suzume was gentle and had a sincere personality, but that's not the case at all, the character is more, "Like brother, like sister." They have the same core beliefs that everything they do is for the sake of their country. They're the perfect siblings for the country of Toufu, don't you think?

"What do you pay special attention to when acting?"

Kaku: In regards to facial expressions, I thought it'd be funny if I smiled during critical scenes, or, if I had a more serious look in a scene, people might think, "Is Kaguragi being cornered?" I try not to bore the audience with my performance. I want to be as funny as possible, but in serious scenes, I just have to go with the flow. I make sure to pay attention to that.

"Kaguragi is always a step ahead and planning strategies, but how far ahead does Kaku-san know?"

Kaku: I don't know anything (laughs). I only knew that Racules would be leaving, and that the new chapter would begin after episode 26. I act after understanding the developments of the story up to 2-3 episodes ahead of the one we're currently filming, then, I would get the script for the next few episodes and continue to work on the story. It's a process I'll repeat. Even in the scene where he and Racules are trying to figure out each other's true intentions, as part of his trickery, Kaguragi pretends not to know, even though he does know alot of things, while I myself don't know anything. Honestly, it's difficult to play the role this way. I wish they'd atleast tell me alittle more…(bitter smile).

"Masato Yano-san, who played the role of Racules, was said to be aware of what was going to happen in the future."

Kaku: He knows what'll happen to Racules, but he doesn't know anything about the other characters. Maybe he does know and is just keeping quiet (laughs).

"The battles between Kaguragi and Racules to find the other person's true intentions were always worth watching. Some fans said, "Just those scenes alone were like a night time drama."

Kaku: (laughs). I had alot of fun interacting with Racules. I knew alittle bit of what was going to happen, so I used my imagination to fill in the blanks, and I discussed the performance with Yano-chan. It was more like a negotiation than a discussion. We didn't talk much about the details, but I would watch Yano-chan's performance on set and think to myself that, "If that's how he's going to do it, then I'll do it too," and, "I see, so that's how it's going to be," and I played my role, thinking it was a good learning experience. It's nice to be called a, "Night time drama." I think it means that we were able to create a world for the 2 of us. Kaguragi has a very serious face for serious scenes, but in the scenes with Racules, he bluffs or makes exaggerated and dramatic facial expressions and movements, and I like these scenes because it gives off a sense of trickery, and expresses Kaguragi's true side.

"The scene in the film, "Adventure Heaven," which was released in July, in which Kaguragi and Iroki, the previous ruler of Toufu, confront each other, is also memorable."

Kaku: Hinagata Akiko-san played the role of Iroki, and I think it turned out to be a very good scene. Also in the film, the confrontation between the kings and their past hardships was the highlight of Kaguragi's performance.

"What do you feel is the most difficult when playing Kaguragi?"

Kaku: In the beginning, I had a hard time with the dubbing. Now, I'm quite used to it, and the other cast members are also getting alot better with their voices, and I'm always impressed at the speed in which they're growing. My comments are somewhat from a father's point of view, but since I'm older than the other main cast members, I can't help but feel this way (laughs).

"Can you name some of the most memorable scenes and lines of Kaguragi up to episode 26, which has aired by the time of this book's publication?"

Kaku: Episode 18 left a lasting impression on me overall. Particularly in the second half, when he and Gira cooperate to defeat the giant robot King-Ohger ZERO, which is piloted by Racules. When asked by Racules, "Was everything you did to take away my power?!," it became clear that Kaguragi himself was acting in a calculated way. The first half's, "He's unfair," is also memorable. When Gira tells me how Suzume is doing, and I ask, "What do you want in exchange for this information?" Gira replies, "Nothing." I was once again drawn in by Gira, who never asked for anything in return….It was a nice scene. Taking place in Toufu, Episode 4 is also very impressive. He's unmoved by Desnarak VIII, and dosen't show his true feelings, but, his expression changes the moment the crop fields are burned. I remember that scene well because it clearly showed Kaguragi's character, someone who values the country of Toufu and its citizens above all else.

"In episode 5, when the 5 kings fight together for the first time, Kaguragi says, "I've always believed that this day would come!," and it's funny to see Gira and the others yell at him with, "Liar!"

Kaku: I was happy that the other kings recognized me as a liar (laughs). Being a liar is one of the characteristics that define Kaguragi.

"If the kings are going to unite to fight against new enemies in the future, we feel like Kaguragi won't be able to showcase his individuality…"

Kaku: My own prediction is that the kings will break up atleast once. I have the impression that the royal Sentai aren't always on good terms. Therefore, I believe that Kaguragi's character will continue to be shown off. Also, if the enemy were to say, "We're going to destroy all the countries, but we'll save only one," Kaguragi will betray the other kings in an instant (laughs).

-Out of the 6 of us, I'm the, "Selfish king," that hogs the air conditioner-

"Now, we'd like to hear your impressions of the other kings surrounding Kaguragi. First, let's start with Gira."

Kaku: In episode 18, it's clear that Kaguragi is drawn towards and approves of him, as evidenced by the "He's unfair" line. However, some may think that he's easier to handle and hold in my grasp as opposed to Racules, so I like him because he's easier to deal with. Personally, I think he's cute (laughs). I think he gives off the strong feeling of a little brother.

"Please tell us about Yanma Gast and Hymeno Ran."

Kaku: There haven't been many opportunities for Kaguragi to interact with Yanma, but, Kaguragi understands that Yanma is smart, so if he wasn't able to manage himself well, he'd probably be thinking carefully when talking to Yanma. On the other hand, I think part of him feels that because Yanma's so smart, it's easier for him to plan ahead, or that his actions are easier to read than Gira's, which are based more on instinct. My impression of him is that he's passionate and cool! I liked the scene in episode 17, when he's falling apart, and says, "Don't you dare lose!," and Gira takes over. I think it's great that he's always so cool. The way he lives, the way he thinks, and even his actions have a certain charm to them that makes him a lovable character. Aoto, who plays the role, is also very cool. He's always on the scene as Yanma, or rather, he's always thinking about how Yanma would act in certain situations.

At one point, I thought that Hymeno and Kaguragi got along, but I think they probably don't like each other since the falling out in episode 8, where he went, "Ho?" (bitter smile). I hope they can talk things out and make up in the future… My impression is that she's simple and cute. She acts like a princess in every way, and even though she's selfish, that by itself is cute. Even still, the way she stands and acts in the battle scenes are powerful and cool. That kind of contrast is also wonderful.

"Next, Rita and Jeramie."

Kaku: Rita is also cool. When they're interacting with Moffun, I think the contrast is rather sly (laughs). I think Hirakawa Yuzuki-san, who plays the role, is very good with action. It must be difficult to move in those boots. From Kaguragi's perspective, they seem like a strict judge, and I think he perceives them as someone he'd like to have on his side somehow. In their relationship, Kaguragi visits Rita and tries to give them a gift. Rita doesn't want to accept it, but Kaguragi says, "Now, now, that just won't do," and forcibly hands it to them, pulling them into his own pace…that's the image I got from it. This is all just my imagination.

In episode 20, Kaguragi and Jeramie worked together to deceive Racules, and as a result, they revealed that Boshimar (Racules's close aide) was really Kamejim, and they've been fighting together ever since then. He also looks over the relationship between Kaguragi and Suzume, so I think they also have a good relationship. I think it's because of his parents unacceptable relationship, being between a human and Bugnarak, that Jeramie has a weakness for separated families, and he wants to support them. From my point of view, isn't he too good looking? I think he is. And that voice…it's really not fair. I'm talking about his actor, Masashi Ikeda-kun, who plays Jeramie, he's also good at soccer and plays the drums. (said earnestly) It's so unfair, isn't it?~…

"(laughs). We'd also like to hear your impressions of Kuroda-san, who's close to Kaguragi."

Kaku: From the beginning, I was told that Kaguragi was served by people dressed in black, but I wasn't told that there was one prominent member among them. From the viewer's point of view, I guess they wouldn't have expected such a person to exist, but gradually, Kuroda-san became more noticeable, and his relationship with Kaguragi began to be depicted. Kuroda-san is more like a family member than an aide. I think he's been by Kaguragi's side for a looong~ time. He's alittle older than me, and I think we've grown up together since we were children. He's capable of saying one word that'll resonate with Kaguragi's heart, and I think he's able to do so because he's always been watching over Kaguragi.

"Among the main cast members playing a king, who does Kaku-san feel is most kingly?"

Kaku: Hmmm, since the show was first announced, I've often been asked questions related to being a king, but I still can't come up with any good answers…If you think of a kingly image, "arrogant" or "selfish," may come to mind, but there's no in this cast that fits those terms. Everyone, they're all such good kids. But, I may have to say that I become selfish when the temperature rises. I'm sensitive to the heat, and since I'm wearing such a costume, I tend to hog all the places where an air conditioner is running, or, I turn the temperature down really low and tell the others not to turn it up, even if they're cold (laughs). If I were to consider the most kingly character as a leader who pulls everyone along, I would say it's Taisei. Calling him charismatic would be abit of an exaggeration, but, even if he's lacking in certain areas, he's good in others, and he has a certain atmosphere to him that brings everyone together. People around him want to support him just like Gira, and maybe even carry him up in a holy palanquin. In that sense, he's like a king.

"What scenes would you like to play in the future?"

Kaku: It would be a scene where I take off my costume and show off my body. Actually, I've already told the staff what I want to do, but if it's going to happen, I'd like to know as soon as possible. I'd like to finish my body first. And then, a twin episode (laughs). Within the Super Sentai series, often times there are episodes where someone who looks exactly like a character appears and swaps places. Since the first part of King-Ohger ended with episode 26, we didn't have room for that kind of story, but, it may be possible now. I have a twin brother who looks exactly like me, so I'd like to make the most of that. He's not an actor, but he says he'd be happy to act in the show if it were to happen (laughs). Also, Taisei himself is a very interesting character, so I hope there'll be a time when we can make use of him. That boy, after all, he shines the brightest when he's just messing around. That's something he's admitted to himself and others. Also, I'd like to see Rita being more expressive. In the film, it was ghosts, and in episode 26, they're depicted as being afraid of the dark, but I think there's another side to them that we don't know about, so I hope we're given a close up. Hirakawa-san herself is frightened easily, and when I tell her a slightly scary story, she screams, "Please stop it!" (laughs).

"Finally, Kaku-san, as episode 26 finishes, please give a yell of support to Kaguragi."

Kaku: I think Toufu will probably be in danger again (laughs), so you may have to deceive your friends in order to protect the country. I also think that Suzume will be entering a difficult time in her life. But, please don't be discouraged and do your best!

_

Ikeda Masashi (Jeramie Brasieri) Interview

-I like talking, but I'm not used to talking to other people-

"In the beginning, what kind of character was Jeramie and how was he explained to you?"

Ikeda: He’s 2,000 years old, so he has foresight and plenty of time to waste, and was born between a human and a Bugnarak. When I asked…I was told that he can manipulate spider webs at will. It was also explained to me at the beginning that he's the storyteller of the world's story and will also narrate the show.

"In episode 11, we got goosebumps hearing, "A man who becomes king, this is my story," in the ending narration.

Ikeda: I was also surprised when I read the script. It was an original concept, so I was looking forward to seeing the end result on screen.

"Based on the description you received, how did you approach the character?"

Ikeda: When I read the script, there were many unique lines and inflections, so the first thing I thought about was how to express them. I'd record different ways of speaking, listen back, and then decided that the stuck up way of saying things were the most interesting. The premise is that Jeramie likes to talk about himself and the stories he's created. So, when I talk to someone, I try to look like I'm having fun and enjoying myself more than anyone else. I think it'll lead to expressions with more composure. I was also conscious of the way I walked, my gestures, and appearance in general so that I could develop a habit of being Jeramie. The most difficult part of the role was that his mother is a Bugnarak, and that his emotions are different from those of a normal human. I wondered, “What would it feel like if my own parents were Bugnarak?” In the beginning, I couldn't comprehend it no matter how much I thought about it, so I just kept imagining memories of my mother that weren't depicted in the show. Even still, it was difficult for me to find feelings for the Bugnarak, or rather, affection for non human beings. I also wondered how he'd seen the world over the past 2,000 years and what he'd been thinking about when he wrote his story. There are many aspects of Jeramie that are not depicted in the show's script, so I had to really think about it. Even now, I still do.

"Did you make any new discoveries while exploring further, or did you have to revise your performance over the course of the episodes?"

Ikeda: When he first made his appearance, he always said the words, "Between the lines" (laughs), and I just felt that he was someone who wasn't used to having conversations with others. But as times went on, I came to realize that Jeramie was truly a genuine and honest person. I felt that this is why he reacts to many things in a more genuine way than anyone else, and shows it most in his facial expressions. As Jeramie gets more involved with the 5 kings, he changes and grows, becoming alot more careful about communicating clearly between the lines. Every time I'm given a new script, a new side of Jeramie's character is depicted, and I feel like he's constantly being updated. Despite being 2,000 years old, he's never socialized before. The first big change was that he took off the mask he'd been wearing in episode 11, and I think we can all agree that he started a new life from that moment on. At that time, if you were to interpret it as Jeramie being reborn, he's still like a baby, so it's only natural that he'll continue to grow everyday. There are new changes every time, and thinking of ways to express them is both fun and a challenge. In that sense, I'm grateful for the role of Jeramie, as it gives me a sense of fulfillment as an actor.

"The symbolic color of Jeramie is white, and Ikeda-san personally loves white, so he wore a white outfit to the audition."

Ikeda: I matched everything in white, which might be hard to imagine (laughs). My shoes, pants, shirt, cardigan, and jacket were all white. I wore a white coat over it all. I like white, but I had never dressed myself up this much. But, I wanted to give it a shot, so I auditioned completely white. And with the role I got, his getup was even whiter than mine. Jeramie's costume is really cool. When I stood in front of the mirror for the first time wearing Jeramie's costume, with my hair and makeup all done, I thought, "Who's this?" (laugh). I'd never had the opportunity to wear such a prince like costume before, and I don't think I ever will again. Every time I go to filming, I'll wear it while thinking about how happy it makes me.

"Do you have any difficulties narrating the show? We've heard that you don't like hearing your own voice…"

Ikeda: Every time I do the narration, it's given the OK for airing, but I've never been satisfied with any of the ones I've recorded. There's alot of trial and error each time I record, but I don't feel like I'm getting a good reaction. I think I still have a long way to go, so I'm going to keep working hard.

"Every time we listen, we think you have a nice voice."

Ikeda: Thank you so much. It's very encouraging to hear you say that. But, being a storyteller means I can see every detail, and that I also know how the story will end, so I can feel the difficulty of it all. Some episodes have a closing narration at the end, and I do like those lines because they're cool. Is it the narration as a storyteller? or is it the voice of Jeramie's heart in that scene…? I think you'll enjoy the show more if you watch it while interpreting things in many different ways.

"As of the publication of this book, episode 26 will have aired, but please tell us about any scenes or lines featuring Jeramie that are memorable."

Ikeda: It would be episodes 24-26. Those 3 episodes were a turning point in Jeramie's life, where he felt the same realization of growth, maybe even more so, than when he took off his mask. All of the scenes and lines are memorable. In episode 24, when Boone discovers that his fear of Bugnarak is based on a legendary story he wrote, Jeramie is stunned, saying, "Common sense, rules, prejudice, discrimination, bigotry…I was the one who created them…" I was just as shocked when I read it in the script. The legend of the royal Sentai doesn't state that the Bugnarak did anything wrong. But, reading the text, "5 heroes and their guardian god King-Ohger defeated the Bugnarak and saved mankind," would make anyone believe that the Bugnarak are bad guys. I was impressed by how well done it was, and Jeramie seemed to enjoy talking about it, that I almost felt like saying, "It's no good!," in a forced way. In episode 25, the conversation with Gerojim was memorable. He says, "What you lack is determination!" Jeramie responds, "Follow me…to the In between Land Bugnarak. You'll be the first citizen." I'll never forget it because it was the moment when Jeramie decided that he was ready to become the king of Bugnarak. From then on, I'd be playing Jeramie as a king, so the scene was a turning point as well. In episode 26, there's the scene where Jeramie is entrusted by Desnarak VIII, saying, "You will be king, and they will accept it. That the Bugnarak, are here…!" In the 3 episodes beginning with episode 24, it's revealed that Desnarak had alot of things on his mind when he was king, and Jeramie inherits that. Now, I have all these feelings regarding Desnarak, that when I first read the script, I cried. And also, there's the narration before the opening of episode 24. It was different from the usual wording, so it's stayed with me.

-I like Kaguragi, as he's someone with alot of space between the lines-

"Now, please tell us about the characters that surround Jeramie. First, let's start with Gira."

Ikeda: From Jeramie's point of view, I think he trusted Gira from the beginning, and for the time after the broadcast of episode 26, I think he genuinely thinks he's a good person, more suitable as the king of Shugoddum than anyone ever was. The impression I have is….he's cute. He's pure, and when I look at him, I often wonder, "What's he up to?" In episode 15, he camouflages himself as a taxi that looks like a pillbug (laughs). But, I think him being straightforward to protect his people is really cool.

"How about Yanma?"

Ikeda: Jeramie understands that, just like Gira, Yanma is a good king. On the other hand, we know that he's abit of a bad boy, and in episode 19, just like a bunch of bad boys, we joined forces to get some payback on Racules, who treated Jeramie and the other kings cruelly in the past. At that time, I think Jeramie went along with Yanma's plan because he trusted him and realized he was his friend. Yanma always reacts when Jeramie says something. It must be nice for Jeramie, a storyteller who wants someone to listen to him. As for me, I have the impression that he's a passionate guy. I think he fits well with the title "President" of the N'kosopa citizens.

"Now then, how about Hymeno Ran. She and Jeramie had abit of a dispute over the issue of the "Wrath of God."

Ikeda: At first, Jeramie called Hymeno, "Young lady," but, in episode 14, when he saw Hymeno promise to the girl in Ishabana that she would keep their country beautiful, he acknowledged her as queen. Jeramie doesn't look down on the other kings just because he's older. He did used to treat Desnarak like a kid and provoked him (laughs), but he sees all of the human kings as equals and trusts them. Of course he trusts Hymeno, and I think that's why he asked for Gerojim's test. And my own impression is that she's just so beautiful. Not only in terms of appearance, such as the costumes and hairstyles, but also in terms of strength, so I think she's beautiful on the inside as well.

"Next, tell us about Rita Kaniska."

Ikeda: I have a feeling that Jeramie trusts Rita like any other king, but also thinks that they're cute. Sometimes Rita screams real loudly. Towards the climax of episode 19, they screamed, and while everyone was surprised, only Jeramie was laughing. He saw a human side of Rita and smiled, knowing that there must be a side of them that they've yet to show everyone. Because they trust him, even if they suspect something from him, Jeramie feels safe when they take him to court. But, then again, Jeramie's put on trial alot, isn't he? (laughs). Also, there are so many things that Rita makes him realize. For example, in episode 14, they explained to him why Hymeno was angry, because he wasn't able to read between the lines. And when he was down, Rita gave him a chance to get back on his feet. For me, I think Rita is just too cool. When they transform, their right eye, which is usually hidden by their hair, is revealed…and it's gray colored. I love situations in manga and anime where a person reveals something that's usually hidden and goes into a stronger mode. So, Rita's eye isn't fair! (laughs), and yet, they also have the cuteness to talk to their plushies…I think they’re a wonderful characters.

"Please also tell us about Kaguragi."

Ikeda: From Jeramie's point of view, I think he has slightly deeper feelings towards him than the other kings. That's because, he knows about his sister. Because of Jeramie's own upbringing, he can't leave people who care about their family alone. In episode 15, when he finds out that his sister is being held hostage in Shugoddam, he takes the lead in helping Kaguragi, and in episode 20, when he hears that he's doing it for his sister, he helps out by disguising himself as Kaguragi. Kaguragi has also relied on Jeramie, and I think they communicate with each other more than with other kings. I think there's something about Kaguragi that I really like about him, and I feel that he has a story that's, "between the lines," more than mine is. That's why I interact with him alittle differently than the other 4. As a viewer, he must be an interesting character to watch. Just when I think I've got him figured out, he outwits me. It's hard to read what he's really thinking. I think he adds a good "spice" that makes the show more interesting.

"At this point in time, Gerojim is probably the closest to Jeramie, so we'd like to ask about him too."

Ikeda: He's the first citizen of the new Bugnarak Empire. While they meet in a different way compared to the other kings and their retainers, Jeramie trusts him, and a sort of friendship formed between them, while also having a strong desire to protect him. In episode 25, Gerojim risks his body to make Jeramie realize that he lacks the determination to be king. In episode 13, Jeramie saves him by pretending to have defeated him and brought him along, but back then, I never thought that he would end up playing such an important role. With such a voice, he says, "What you lack is determination!," and, "If you're going to be king, you must be prepared to risk your life," so I can't believe his way of speaking…

"He's voiced by Seki Tomokazu-san."

Ikeda: During filming, I would act with Seki-san's voice in mind, and when I heard his actual voice in the finished video, it's always better than what I had imagined. We haven't had a dubbing scheduled together, but I'd like for us to perform together someday. Everyone always imitates Gerojim's voice on set. I'm so emotionally attached to Gerojim, that I can no longer look at him objectively, but I'm curious about how everyone else sees him.

"Other than Gerojim, are there any other Bugnarak characters that you really like?"

Ikeda: It would probably be Desnarak. But, I really like Prime Minister Kamejim as well. I changed my mind when I found out that he was disguised as Boshimar, one of Racules's close aides (laughs), but he was a beloved character on the set until half way through filming.

"Among the main cast, Ikeda-san, who do you think is most kingly?"

Ikeda: It would be (Masato) Yano-san, who plays Racules. When he's playing the role of Racules, he's a very cruel king, but when I talk to him inbetween takes, he's calm and has a relaxed way of speaking. Yano-san himself is very kind and will say interesting things to keep everyone upbeat. Furthermore, he has alot of special skills and can do almost anything. For me, Yano-san is a king in the sense that he's perfect and someone who is respected. Racules is a king, but the person playing him is also a king. Not for me, but when the 5 King-Ohger members put on their costumes and prepare for their role on set, the "switch" is flipped and they all become kings. The scenes where they're all lined up is so cool that you can't help but admire them.

"Are there any scenes you'd like to play, or developments you'd like to see happen in the future?"

Ikeda: In episode 19, the hammock that Jeramie was laying in was made from spider webs. I'd like to do more scenes using spider webs even before transforming. Especially for action. While his friends are in danger, he could fly in from off screen while smiling, or he could be standing on a wall. It would be difficult to achieve, but there aren't many roles that can make use of spider webs.

"Finally, for the current Jeramie, Ikeda-san, please give a yell of support to him."

Ikeda: Please build a good country, and work hard to make the world a peaceful one. For Jeramie, the "color" of the country he rules over is different from other kings, and I believe that Jeramie will be the one who determines the future of Chikyu. Please ensure the prosperity of the country of Bugnarak, realize the day we join hands with humanity, and pass it on to future generations. We're all supporting you!

[shmaptainwrites]

𝐁𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 [𝐅𝐈𝐓𝐙𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐌 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐂𝐘]

PAIRINGS —  Fitzwilliam Darcy x fem!Reader

SUMMARY —  Referred by a close family friend, reader finds herself a job tutoring a lovely young girl and begins to form an unlikely connection with her older brother

WARNINGS — slight angst, non main character death, breastfeeding (non descriptive, idk if this i need a warning for this but)

NOTE — okay so I know some of my fics in the past got kinda niche with concepts and some characters but honestly I think we’re entering a new era with that, but either way I hope those of you who like P&P enjoy this just as much as I do :) also I wrote this with Colin Firth’s Darcy in mind but I think it could just as well work with Matthew MacFayden’s (This can be considered to happen after his proposal to Lizzie but like if they didn’t end up working out)

You tried desperately to shake off the nerves that overcame you, it was not like this was the first wealthy family you had tutored for, but something about Pemberley just seemed so out of your grasp. You had received the position only through an old colleague who was moving to Scotland to be nearer to his family and had communicated with your employer via mail. From what your friend had shared his former boss wasn’t one who was warm and open, he might even be considered a little standoffish, but all he wanted was what was best for his younger sister who you would be tutoring. 

He’s a good man, he’s just maybe not as warm as you’re used to. 

And according to friends you were used to a lot warmer than most. Your father was never shy showing his affection to his children and you all loved him more for it, but it seemed to make you just a little off put with the way everyone acted in such a closed off society. 

With one final deep breath you knocked and the door was almost immediately opened by one of the servants. 

“I-I’m here to see Mr. Darcy,” you explained. “I’m the new tutor for Miss Darcy.” 

“Yes, Miss (L/N) is it?” 

“Yes, ma’am,” you gave her a polite smile. 

“Right this way, Mr. Darcy is in his office.” 

You followed the housekeeper inside and had to keep yourself from gasping at the beauty of Pemberley’s interior. 

After your presence was announced to Mr. Darcy, you were allowed to enter the room and gave a quick curtsey to get the formalities over with. 

“Mr. Darcy, it’s nice to finally meet you in person,” 

The man nodded, but offered no response. 

“I am assuming you have gone over the subjects I would like Georgiana to go over?” 

“Yes sir,” you nodded and bit the inside of your cheek. It was your job, why wouldn’t you have done that? 

“Very well, then that will be the extent of our dealings today. Someone will take your to Georgiana so you can meet her and being your studies,” 

“Thank you, sir,” 

Hamish was right, Mr. Darcy was not as warm as you were used to.

The lady who had shown you to Mr. Darcy beckoned you to follow her again and took you down the long halls and up the grand staircase which took you to the young Miss Darcy. 

When you saw her she was hunched over what looked like a piece of sheet music, making various annotations and comments in the margins. You remembered a younger version of yourself doing something similar to remind yourself of where there needed to be extra emphasis on things. 

Georgiana Darcy had a quiet shyness even just to the way she carried herself, but in that way she reminded you of your younger sister closest to you in age. She was maybe a year or so older than Georgiana and even from having barely known her a few moments you knew if they were ever to meet they would be great friends. 

“Ma’am,” Georgiana looked up and noticed you in the room, quickly shuffling away her papers while introductions were made. 

“It’s nice to meet you,” you smiled. “I’m close friends with Mr. Morrison, he’s told me a lot about you.” 

“You know Mr, Morrison? I was so sad to hear he was moving so far away,” Georgiana sighed. “He was a very engaging tutor,” 

“I hope I can live up to his standard,” you chuckled. “Your older brother gave me the impression that you’re prepared to begin your lesson today.” 

“I am,” she confirmed. “I was hoping we could start with something a little lighter though, but knowing my brother and his curriculum that might be impossible.” 

“He does have very high hopes for you,” you noted. “He mentioned to me in one of his letters he hopes for you to have the tools to be a smart, capable, and independent young lady.” 

“As long as being independent doesn’t mean being sad and alone,,” she giggled. “Come, I have a space set up in another room for lessons.” 

Georgiana took your hand and dragged you off to her study room, decorated by he you assumed, with flowers, paintings and lots and lots of books. There was even another piano in the corner of the room and she gauged your reaction to the space. 

“It’s beautiful,” you grinned. “You did this all yourself?” 

“Aside from moving the piano, yes,” she nodded. “But I told them where to put it and my brother helped me pick out the paintings.” 

“Well, you both have very good taste,” you praised. “Which might be a rather nice segue into our first lesson,” 

“Are we going to paint?” Georgiana asked, she even looked a little excited. 

“I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but unfortunately not. It’s a review of art history, but I promise I’ll try to make it as bearable as possible,” 

“I trust you,” Georgiana smiled and sat down at the table. “As long as you can keep up with my endless questions we should be in good shape,” 

“I’ll try my best.” 

You smiled as you set down your papers and lesson plans. You would have to send a letter to Hamish because this may just turn out to be the best job you’d ever have. 

—

It had been a few months of you working at Pemberley and you couldn’t have been happier. Your walk to and from the village everyday was a little long, but it was worth it when you had a student like Georgiana. It really felt like you were spending time with your younger sister and you thought she maybe even came to see you as an older sibling. 

You had only really spent a handful of moments with Mr. Darcy and most of the pleasant ones involved his younger sister. You hadn’t much inclination to spend time with him although you didn’t complain when he came to sit in Georgiana’s study room to observe or read quietly while you went through your lessons with her. 

There was a quiet handsomeness to him and although he was not outwardly warm and fuzzy at least he was like the works of art you would review with Georgiana when discussing sculpting during the Renaissance. 

One afternoon during lunch, you noticed Georgiana was sending her brother some sideways glances, as if she wanted him to say something and when he wasn’t understanding her signals she cleared her throat and turned her attention to you. 

“(Y/N)-,” 

“Georgiana, we’ve spoken about this,” her brother scolded. 

“No, it’s quite alright,” you assured Mr. Darcy. “We’ve made a small agreement to refer to each other by our first names,” you explained. 

“I am well aware of the agreement, but that doesn not change the fact that it demeans your position as her tutor when she refers to you so plainly,” 

“I didn’t think my name was that plain, sir,” you remarked and ate a bite of your salad while Georgiana chuckled. That seemed to silence him so his sister continued. 

“Anyways, I was meaning to ask you about your walk to Pemberley every morning, it must be terrible when the weather is poor.” 

“I must admit it worries me to catch a cold when I should be fit enough to work, but I don’t mind the walk too much,” 

“I believe what my dear sister is trying to express,” Mr. Darcy jumped in. “Is that we’ve cleared a room for you to stay at Pemberley if you wish to do so.” 

“A room here?” you confirmed and Georgiana nodded with a wide smile. “You wouldn’t have to get up so early in the morning anymore and if you’d like to walk you can always do it around the grounds.” 

“T-That’s an incredibly kind offer Mr. Darcy,” you looked at him. “Are you sure this is something you would be alright with in the long term?” 

“I’ve given it extensive thought and it seems to be the best course for Georgiana’s studies and to ensure your continued good health.” 

“Well then, in that case I’d be honoured to accept your offer,” you smiled shyly. “I’ll move my things this weekend.” 

“Fitzwilliam and I can come and help you,” Georgiana suggested. “Can’t we?” 

Mr. Darcy looked at his little sister and you thought you might have caught a flicker of a smile before he nodded his head. 

“We can bring a carriage down and help load it up,”

He very well could have people come and do that for him, but there was something interesting about how he was so casual in accepting the suggestion of his sister. 

You would have assumed helping his younger sister’s tutor move into his home to be something quite beneath him. 

“Thank you, that’s a very kind offer. I’ll be sure to have tea waiting for when you arrive,” 

Georgiana clapped her hands together as if having you move to Pemberley was the best news she’d ever heard. You couldn’t help but wonder if the closed off and distant Mr. Darcy was doing all of this to please his younger sister, but when you took a moment to glance at him you saw how his eyes were already fixed on you and maybe it wasn’t just Georgiana’s doing after all. 

—

Something you would never come to understand was how the gardens of Pemberley were so pristine no matter the time of year. The hedges were perfectly trimmed, flowers beautifully in bloom and never wilted. 

During the summer months it was warm enough to go outside and sit without a jacket by the lake which you enjoyed doing on the weekends, bringing a good book and soaking up as much of the sunlight as you could get. 

You were so engrossed in your novel, oftentimes you wouldn’t notice if someone had come to call on you, or anything around you for that matter. 

So it came as a shock when you heard a voice that was in very close proximity to you, making you jump with fright. 

You placed a hand on your chest to steady your beating heart as you looked up only to find Mr. Darcy there. 

“Oh, Mr. Darcy, I don’t think I’ve been scared like that since… well, it’s been a long while,” you tried to catch your breath and steady it. 

“I apologize,” he said. “Might I ask what has inclined you to sit out here,” 

“Well, the sunlight for one,” you noted. “And a good book which I was reading until I was so frightfully interrupted.” 

“Right,” he nodded. “I should take my leave so you can continue-,” 

“Mr. Darcy I’m afraid you misunderstand me,” you interrupted him with a small chuckle. You were only teasing him,  “If you’d like to join me you're most welcome to. This is, after all, your home.” 

Mr. Darcy lifted his coattails and sat himself down on the grassy knoll next to you, looking out towards the lake. 

“Is your family all in good health?” he inquired. 

“Yes, as of last week they are,” you nodded. 

“You have how many siblings?” 

You took a moment to count on your fingers, whispering the names of each of your sisters and one brother until you had the final count of six. 

“Six, sir. I assume it’s just you and Georgiana?” 

“You are correct in your assumption,” he nodded. 

There was a moment of awkward silence between you both before you figured you would probably have to be the one to break it. 

“I do enjoy myself greatly at Pemberley, I’m very thankful for your hospitality.” 

Still silence, but as if he wasn’t sure how to answer. 

“Mr. Darcy are you alright?” you asked. 

“Quite,” he cleared his throat and nodded. “Yes, I’m quite alright,” 

His eyes drifted over to your book and noticing its title he pointed to it. 

“M-May I?” 

“Of course,” you nodded, sliding in your bookmark and handing the novel to him. His fingers brushed over yours and you could feel your breath hitch at his touch. 

He examined the binding and structure of the book before its contents, scanning the first few pages, but you were too focused on the burning feeling that he left on your fingertips. You gently massaged it away hoping he wouldn’t notice the way you had reacted to such a simple thing, but desire was nothing to be fooled with. 

“H-Has it passed your inspection, Mr. Darcy?” you asked, glancing down at the book, then at him, your hand still folded in your lap. 

“I have no objections,” he agreed. “A fine choice.” 

“I’ve only just started it,” you told him. “I’m rather anxious to see how it ends,” 

He took one last glance at the title as if he wanted to commit it to memory before handing it back to you. 

“I shall look forward to hearing your thoughts on it once you finish,” 

You smiled when he said that, you knew what Hamish had said when you first came to Pemberley, but now that you had been there the greater part of four months you wished to believe that maybe Mr. Darcy did have a soft side. 

“And I shall look forward to conversing with you,” 

You noticed the faintest twitch of his lip as if he was fighting away a smile, but he quickly brushed it off and gave you a polite nod before standing up and wishing you a good day. 

You opened your book back to where you had left off, but your mind was distracted. It was safe to say you didn’t get much further. 

—

“Fitz, you have to help me convince her she’s being very stubborn,” Georgiana eyed you and you tried to focus on eating your dinner. 

“I’m sure Miss (L/N) has a very good reason to not be convinced of whatever it is you’re asking of her,” Mr. Darcy came to your defence. 

“But-,” 

“Georgiana,” her brother warned, but the young lady would not have it. 

“Fitzwilliam,” she mimicked him. “She’s planning on staying bolted up in her room during our ball you have to do something,” 

Mr. Darcy looked up from his plate to you, his hands holding the utensils relaxing as he eyed your curiously. 

“You won’t come to the ball?” he asked. 

“No sir, I was not intending to,” you shook your head. 

“May inquire as to why?” 

“I-I don’t have anything to wear,” you admitted. “And I do not want to make yourselves or myself out of place with the company you shall be hosting,” 

“It would be more cumbersome for us if you weren’t there,” Georgiana tried to convince you. “Most of these balls are out of societal obligation and Fitzwilliam and I would be better off with your company, not without it. Lord knows how much he hates small talk,” 

“Georgiana, now that’s enough,” Mr. Darcy ended whatever was left of the conversation. “Miss (L/N) is a grown woman and can make the decision herself on whether she will attend the ball or not,” 

You thought that would be the end of it and that you would stay in your room with no questions asked, but a few days later when you walked into your room there was an unfamiliar package on the bed. 

You picked it up and unwrapped the carefully folded paper packaging to reveal a beautiful dress, one of the latest fashions from London. Something you could never imagine being able to afford. 

Attached to the package was a note, you quickly unfolded it and read what was written. 

I hope you understand that I only wished to remove any barriers preventing you from joining us next week. The decision is still yours, but I hoped this might help. 

Darcy

You looked down and examined the dress again. It was in a colour you remembered having mentioned — perhaps it was to Georgiana — you liked and the detailing was something like you’d never seen. 

You closed the door to your room and slipped off the dress you were wearing, replacing it with the one from the package instead. 

When you saw your reflection in the mirror you knew then and there you could not let this dress sit away in a closet to be eaten by moths. This dress deserved to be worn. And even though the very thought of it made you sick with nervousness, it deserved to be worn at a ball. 

—

“I cannot tell you how happy I am that you’ve decided to come,” Georgiana linked your arm with hers once you entered Pemberley’s ballroom. 

“It would have been foolish of me to stay in my room with a dress like this,” you looked down at yourself, still unable to believe you were wearing it. 

One of the maids had helped you with your hair, it was in a different style than what you normally wore day to day, but she had done such an amazing job with it you figured it would be hard for people to figure out you didn’t really belong.

Georgiana was your saving grace for a while, helping you start conversations with others and introducing you to their guests, but eventually — just like all good things coming to an end — she was pulled away by one of her friends and you were on your own. 

You poured yourself a glass of punch and stood off in a corner, observing everything that was appening in front of you. 

Georgiana was now dancing with the others and you realized that the whole night you hadn’t caught a glimpse of Mr. Darcy. Your eyes scanned the room for him, but there were so many new faces it was almost becoming dizzying looking through them all. 

“I see you’ve taken my approach to the ball,” 

You jumped at the sound of his voice so near making you spill your punch and staining your new dress. 

“Mr. Darcy,” you gasped. “I hope after this encounter you come to realize how easily I am frightened,” 

“Again, I apologize. It wasn’t my intention to scare you,” he was sincere, but there was a hint of a chuckle in his voice. 

“I’m sure it wasn’t,” you took a deep breath and set down your drink, wiping your hands on a napkin and turning to give him your full attention. “I must say I’m surprised to see you on the sidelines.” 

“I believe Georgiana was ever so kind in mentioning that I detest small talk,” he reminded you. 

“And dancing?” 

“It depends,” he looked straight ahead, his eyes finding Georgiana’s in the crowd. 

“On?” you urged him to continue. 

“Who I’m dancing with.” 

You looked at him thoughtfully before remembering the stain on your dress and you knew there would be no way you could remove it with a little scrub of water alone. 

“I’m afraid you’ll have to excuse me, Mr. Darcy,” you sighed. “It is unfortunately not acceptable to dance in a punch stained dress.” 

“Of course,” he nodded. “Although, Miss (L/N),” 

You turned your head back and looked up at him. 

“Yes?” 

“I would be very grateful if you would allow me to accompany you.” 

“Accompany me?” you confirmed. “To remove the stain from my dress?”

“Yes… or to perhaps mysteriously disappear from my own ball and not return,” he offered and you quickly lifted a hand to cover your mouth and stifle a laugh which finally revealed to you Mr. Darcy’s smile and what a beautiful sight it was. 

“I would be happy for you to accompany me Mr. Darcy,” you nodded and waited a moment for him to catch up the few extra steps to be at the same pace as you while you walked out of the ballroom and towards the bedrooms. 

You could still hear the music faintly in the halls and you admired the peacefulness of it all. 

“Does it ever feel too big?” you asked. 

“Pardon?” 

“Pemberley. Does it ever feel like it’s too big?” you asked him. 

He took a quiet moment of reflection and you patiently awaited his answer. 

“It’s all I’ve ever known,” he admitted. “I’m not sure what smaller would look like.” 

“It’s more about what it feels like,” you expressed. “Including my mother and father there were nine of us at home while I was growing up,” you began to explain. “Our home was not as small compared to a lot of the others around us, but in contrast to Pemberley it seems miniscule. When I wanted to get away from everyone I would have to leave the house, go take a walk in the field. Here I can just go to my room and I’ll be left alone,” 

“Do you miss your home?” Mr. Darcy asked. “Surely you wouldn’t stay there forever.” 

You looked at him curiously and he clarified, 

“What I mean is a woman such as yourself will eventually get married, perhaps move away.” 

“I do miss home sometimes, but it’s mostly my family. There is something about the quiet here, it’s so serene.” you clasped your hands together to stop them from swinging at your side. 

There was another spell of comfortable silence before it was broken again by Mr. Darcy. 

“Miss (L/N), if we stopped by my office I may have something that can help remove the stain from your dress,” 

“You do?” 

“When I was younger I had an awful habit of spilling tea on my white shirts so the maids started to give me something so I could get them cleaned faster,” he explained. “I-I’m not sure if it will work, but it might prove to be useful.” 

“Perhaps you should go grab it while I change out of this dress and into another?” you suggested. “You can meet me at my room.” 

Mr. Darcy nodded and quickly took the turn to his office while you hurried your pace to the end of the hall where your bedroom was. 

As quickly as you could, without damaging the dress, you removed it and laid it on your bed before picking out the nicest clothes you had out of your own belongings, but it came nowhere near even the simplest dress at the ball.

A couple moments after you had gotten dressed there was a knock on your door and you grabbed the dress and opened it. 

“We may need an area with better light,” you looked at your dark room only lit by a small candle. 

“Bring the candle, if we take it to one of the balconies it should give us enough to work with.” 

You nodded and did what he suggested before following him to one of the balconies in question. 

Mr. Darcy held out his hand for your dress and you gave it to him seeing the jar he held in his opposite hand. 

He hung the dress along the balcony’s ledge and opened the jar, pouring some of its contents on the stain. 

“Vinegar?” you asked. 

“And lemon juice,” he nodded after placing the jar down on the ground and scrubbing the affected spot. 

“Mr. Darcy, if you’d like I can take care of it,” you reached out and offered to take the dress off his hands. 

“I-,” he stopped himself as if he was unsure how to word what he wanted to say. “It would mean a great deal if you allowed me to do this for you, Miss (L/N),” 

You nodded your head and retracted your hands, holding them against your stomach, watching as he took extra care until, by the warm light of the candle, the stain was almost completely removed. 

“Thank you,” you said while taking the dress carefully back in your own hands, folding it and placing it on a table inside before coming back out. 

You could hear the music clearly coming from the ballroom, you suspected the windows were open and the sound was travelling. You thought it was a shame you didn’t get to dance, but that was partially your own fault, if you weren’t hidden off in the corner perhaps someone would have asked you. 

“Miss (L/N), I know it is just the two of us, but if I noticed correctly you did not dance tonight,” 

“I was just thinking about that myself,” you nodded. 

“If you would do me the honour of sharing a dance I’m sure we can change that,” he offered his hand. The music was slower, not something one would typically dance to, but maybe Mr. Darcy knew a different style of dance than that which you were familiar with. 

You cautiously took his hand and he brought you close to himself. You placed your other hand on his shoulder while he placed his just above your waist. 

“Have you ever waltzed before?” he asked. 

“Not that I can remember,” your voice was a whisper unable to comprehend how close you were. 

“It’s very simple,” he explained softly, “It’s three steps and you just follow my lead-yes like that,” 

You kept watch on your feet until you got a hang of the movements, allowing yourself to look up and see Mr. Darcy staring right back at you. 

You felt like you couldn’t blink, that if you did the whole moment would vanish. 

“I-I’m sorry I ruined the dress you bought me,” you apologized and looked down again at your feet, any excuse to tear away from his burning eyes that you sensed were reading your very soul. 

“No, I should be the one to apologize for frightening you,” he said. “With or without the dress you could fit in here, Miss (L/N),” 

You could feel your cheeks grow warm and you thanked him quietly for his words. 

The music came to a slow close and your movements stopped with it. You stood a moment, in that same waltzing position like you were waiting for another song to start so you could continue, but it didn’t. At least not one you could waltz to. 

You let go of Mr. Darcy’s hand and you were about to let your hand drop from his shoulder when you noticed a stray curl had fallen on his forehead, and out of instinct — perhaps from years of caring for your younger sisters or maybe even once or twice with Georgiana — you moved it out of the way, only realizing what you had done when it was too late. 

“Oh my-I-I don’t know what came over me,” you quickly stepped away. “I’m so so sorry Mr. Darcy. I should-I think I should take my leave,” 

Your movements were almost frantic as you quickly brushed past him and stepped back into Pemberley, grabbing the dress on the table and rushing to your room, overwrought with embarrassment. 

As if dancing with him so closely wasn’t enough, you scolded yourself behind closed doors, angrily lighting a spare candle and sitting down on the chair in front of the vanity. 

You looked out on yourself, a simple woman, from humble beginnings, desperately wanting something that could never be yours. 

—

“(Y/N), I am absolutely utterly restless, must we continue this lesson immediately?” Georgiana asked you as she looked down in dismay at her French grammar assignment. 

“I suppose not,” you hummed. “Would you like to go for a short walk perhaps? We can both get some fresh air and come back with a clear mind able to conjugate verbs,” 

“That would be amazing,” Georgiana shot up, out of her chair and was already halfway out of the room as you grabbed your things.

You linked arms with her and she eagerly led the way out of Pemberley and towards the lake. 

You saw a figure walking from there in your direction and you squinted trying to figure out who it was, but soon became distracted by some of Georgiana’s questions. 

She asked about the small town you came from, what it was like there, if you missed your family (the answer to that was yes, but the letter you had recently received from your father helped a little with the homesickness). 

You smiled at her curiosity, but your smile disappeared when you looked up and were face to face with a very indecent Mr. Darcy. 

Your eyes grew wide as you saw him in nothing but a soaking white undershirt and pants while Georgiana tried to hide a laugh. 

“Georgiana, Miss (L/N).” he addressed you both. 

You hadn’t spoken to Mr. Darcy — aside from light chatter at the table while you ate your meals — since the ball. You were far too embarrassed to try and converse with him after what you had done, but now here he was in front of you, hardly dressed and making your stomach flutter.

“Mr. Darcy,” you nodded. 

“Shouldn’t you be doing a French lesson Georgiana?” he asked his young sister. 

“We decided to take a break,” she explained. “We’ll get back to it soon,” 

“A-Are you enjoying your walk?” he asked, but his eyes were locked with yours. 

“Yes sir,” you nodded. 

“And your family is in good health? They are all well? Y-Your mother, father and siblings?” 

“Yes, from what I have last heard.” you confirmed. 

You stood there the three of you, staring at each other for a moment before Mr. Darcy finally excused himself to go dress more appropriately. 

After he was out of earshot Georgiana turned to you and with a quiet chuckle noted that her brother enjoyed swimming in the small lake on the property occasionally in the summer to cool off. 

“I don’t think I've seen him quite so flustered before,” she said. “He’s often so composed but I haven’t seen him stutter and stumble like that.” 

“I’m sure he was just cold,” you lied, hoping more than anything you could quickly go back inside and forget about the incident all together. 

—

Mr. Darcy walked down the halls of Pemberley a couple weeks after the lake incident, simply trying to go to his office, but when he heard a loud shriek come from your room his adrenaline raced and he ran there as quickly as possible, knocking on the door to see what was the matter. 

“Miss (L/N)?” he called. “Miss (L/N), are you alright?” 

There was no answer so he announced that he was entering the room, worried for your safety, only to see a letter dropped at your feet while you clutched your heart. 

“Good God,” he ran up to you, almost offering you the solace and comfort of his arms before remembering that it wouldn’t be appropriate. “What happened?” 

“I-I-,” you gagged and covered your mouth. “I think I’m going to be sick!” 

Tears were streaming down your face and your heart was racing far faster than it should have been, you wanted to tell Mr. Darcy the terrible news you had received. What made you cry in horror, and withered your very soul, but you felt dizzy, your dress far too constricting and making it harder for you to breathe.

“(Y/N), you must let me call someone, a doctor, you are unwell,” 

You shook your head, but not as a sign of refusal, you weren’t even aware of what was happening anymore, everything was becoming fuzzy before your knees buckled and it went black. 

You were lucky Mr. Darcy was right next to you as he caught you before you fell and quickly carried you to your bed, laying you down before rushing to the hallway and calling for help. 

Georgiana was closest and she came running down the halls wondering what her brother needed. 

“Georgiana, I need you to get Evangeline to call a doctor immediately and bring me a towel soaked in cold water and the smelling salts.” 

“What happened?” 

“I’m not sure,” he admitted. “She read something and became distraught by it. She wasn’t well enough to tell me before she fainted.” 

“I’ll be quick,” Georgiana nodded and ran back down the hall to do the tasks her brother had requested of her. 

Mr. Darcy headed back into the room and kneeled down next to your bed. He couldn’t help but reach out to hold your hand and give it a squeeze, the worry shimmering in his eyes. He could care less about propriety at that moment. 

He needed you to be alright, desperately, whatever the news was, when he found out he would do everything in his power to assure your comfort. 

Georgiana came back quickly with the requested items and Mr. Darcy sat himself next to you on the bed. gently dabbing the cool towel on your forehead. 

Georgiana placed the smelling salts under your nose only getting a slight twitch from you before Mr. Darcy told his younger sister to leave it for a moment before continuing. 

“Georgiana perhaps you should be at the door when the doctor arrives,” Mr. Darcy said quietly, his eyes never leaving your still frame. 

“Of course, please do call someone if you need anything though,” 

“I will,” he nodded and she slipped out of the room leaving only you and Mr. Darcy. 

He placed the cold towel on your forehead and gave it a moment before he tried the smelling salts again, this time with more luck seeing you begin to stir and wake, realizing all over again what had happened. 

You barely even had a chance to sit up when your body erupted with sobs, your chest heaving and shoulders shaking. Mr. Darcy, again, desperately wanted to offer you comfort in an embrace but giving you any sort of added shock dissuaded him from doing so. 

Georgiana, presumably having heard the sound, ran back into the room and fell at your feet her hand tightly grasping yours. 

“(Y/N), what happened?” her voice was gentle but carried the pain she knew you were feeling. 

“I-It’s my father,” you pressed your lips together and shook your head. You couldn’t bring yourself to say it, covering your mouth with your free hand.

Mr. Darcy grabbed the letter that was on the ground and with your permission skimmed its contents before passing it on to Georgiana.

“Miss (L/N), given the circumstances I believe I should escort you to your family home,” Mr. Darcy shared. “After the doctor has come and checked on you. I’d like to make sure you’re in good health before I return you to them. They need you in one piece.” 

You nodded your head and sniffed, wiping away your tears with the sleeve of your dress. 

“A-And Georgiana, what about h-her? Her st-studies?”

“Never mind me,” Georgiana shook her head and looked at you like you were being silly. She sat next to you on the bed and wrapped you in a tight hug. “I’ll manage for a while. Go be with your family, they need you and you need them.” 

“I can’t thank you both enough for your continued kindness,” you whispered. “Especially at a time like this.” 

“Of course,” Mr. Darcy nodded. 

Georgiana offered to help you pack a bag and you accepted it graciously while Mr. Darcy insisted you stay seated until the doctor came around, not wanting to deal with another fainting spell. It was frightening enough the first time. 

The doctor arrived around five minutes later and assured Mr. Darcy you were alright, just greatly overwhelmed. He recommended for you to take time to rest and relax, but both you and the Darcys knew that would only come when you were back home with your family. 

So with your bag in Mr. Darcy’s hand, you walked up to the prepared carriage. Mr. Darcy helped you inside and he followed shortly after securing your bag, taking the seat next to you, but leaving a decent amount of space between you. 

As the carriage began to make its way off the property you stayed quiet. Watching outside of its window at the gardens passing by, thinking about how long it had been since you’d seen your father and how you wished you could have been at his side when he left this world. 

Your eyes flicked to the empty spot next to you, noticing the way Mr. Darcy’s hand was resting next to his side. You carefully inched yours closer to his, wanting to ask for comfort, but not knowing what reaction it would bring. He was — after all — a very proper gentleman. 

You turned your head again and watched the scenery outside when you felt the faintest brush against your hand, to be sure you looked once more and saw how Mr. Darcy’s hand was now even closer to yours, as if he was making sure it was alright. 

You slowly stretched your fingers out slightly to him as he made the last move, placing his hand over your own and giving it a gentle squeeze as you both continued to look out of your respective windows. You didn’t dare turn to look at each other. 

When the carriage stopped in front of your home, Mr. Darcy was the one to let go of your hand, but only for a moment until he helped you out of the carriage. He told the driver he would handle your bag and after he handed it to you, you thanked him once more for his kindness. 

“And not just this, Mr. Darcy,” you sniffed and wiped away a few remaining tears. “It’s not lost on me what you have done for me in the time I’ve stayed with you at Pemberley. My room, the dress, the small parcels of books you’d leave on my desk every month,” the thought of his generosity was enough to bring a small soft smile to your face. 

And if he had the chance to do it again, Mr. Darcy knew he wouldn’t change a thing. 

“Thank you for bringing a light back into Pemberley that I haven’t seen in many years. You’ve done me a service just as much as you have claimed I have for you.” 

You gave him one last fleeting smile as a goodbye before you knocked at the door of your home, waiting for one of your siblings to let you inside.

—

It had been three weeks since you had left Pemberley and as much as you wanted it to be, it wasn’t a pleasant feeling to return, knowing what was in store. 

Once you were let in, you headed straight for Mr. Darcy’s office where Evangeline said he would be. You knocked on the door and as soon as you heard permission to come inside you entered. 

“Mr. Darcy, I need to speak with you urgently.” 

“Miss (L/N), I-we weren’t expecting your return today. I’ll send someone immediately to prepare your room.” 

“There’s no need, sir,” you bit the inside of your cheek. “I’ve come here to hand in my registration.” 

“Resignation?” Mr. Darcy was not expecting that. “I-Is this because of the passing of your father?” 

“In part,” you nodded. “I’ve been given time to reflect on the matter and I have now realized that during my time here there have been many boundaries of which I have crossed,” you continued to explain. “This has nothing to do with either your or Georgiana, this is completely my own mistake and I wish to own up to it.” 

Mr. Darcy was speechless, he wanted to argue with you, tell you how foolish you were being and that nothing of the sort had happened, but he could see your mind was set and if this was something that would make you happy, he didn’t want to be the person who got in the way. 

“I understand your decision, and although I do not necessarily agree with it, I will not stop you,” he said quietly. 

You pressed your lips together and nodded, “I’ll go pack my things and give the news to Georgiana.”

You left his office without another word and headed to your room to begin packing. 

After everything was complete and your belongings were in the carriage you looked around for Georgiana, finding her by the piano playing a quiet melody. 

Her playing stopped abruptly when she noticed you were there and she ran over to give you a hug. 

“You’re leaving aren’t you,” she mumbled quietly into your shoulder and you nodded as the young girl squeezed you tightly. 

“I’m so sorry Georgiana,” you apologized. “Please know that I have loved every moment I have spent with you. And I love you very dearly, as if you were one of my sisters.”

“I love you too,” she cried softly and you held her close, clutching a letter you had written for her in your hand. 

You gently pulled away from her, only to be able to wipe her tears and place a soft kiss to her forehead. 

“You can come visit me anytime you’d like,” you assured her. 

“I will. As much as I can.” 

You handed her the letter and she held it close to her heart. 

“I’ll see you again, I promise,” you tucked a small strand of her blond hair behind her ear and pulled her in for one last hug goodbye before leaving Pemberley and your heart behind you. 

—

Two months later…

“Fitz,” 

“Hello, Fitz?”

“Fitzwilliam Darcy,” Georgiana snapped her fingers in front of her brother’s face and he finally blinked out of his trance. 

“What is it Georgiana?” his voice almost sounded like a sigh, the past two months at Pemberley had been gloomy to say the very least. 

“You’re unhappy, Fitzwilliam,” she stated. “Melancholic, miserable, despondent, however you put it, it doesn’t matter.” 

“Why do you think that is,” he sat back in his seat, listening to his sister. 

“Because you miss her,”

“Her? Who is her?” 

“(Y/N), you miss (Y/N),” she said. “And do not try to deny it. You’ve been grumpy since she’s left and all you’ve done is mope about. You love her, Fitz. Which is why you should go after her because I think she loves you too,” 

Mr. Darcy only shook his head at his little sister, but it was more to save his own image than to disregard what she was saying, because he knew it to be the truth. At least for him it was, why would you have left if you loved him.

After lunch he sat in his office and attempted to get some work done and unfortunately his productivity was not particularly fruitful. Evangeline came in later to bring him a cup of tea and he thanked her, hoping maybe a warm drink could get him back on track. Instead, he knocked over the cup and spilled its contents on his white shirt as he cursed himself for his clumsiness. 

He grabbed a spare shirt from his room close by and went to try and remove the stain from the dirtied one. As he pulled out his mixture of vinegar and lemon from one of his desk drawers he paused, his mind drifting back to the night of the ball. 

He remembered holding your dress in his hands, insisting that he be the one to help remove the stain, it was so simple yet to him it felt incredibly personal, he hoped it showed that he cared. The way you danced together, slowly, close to one another, scandalous by all definitions, but how you had both become lost in each other's eyes and how you hadn’t missed a beat in fixing an unruly curl that had fallen onto his forehead. 

Upon a moment of reflection, he realized that perhaps his reading of your behaviour had been wrong, that maybe everything you had done, even leaving, you’d done because of him. 

He didn’t want to inflate his own ego, but there was only one way he would be able to get it out of his mind and that was to ask. The worst that could come of it is things would stay the same. Mr. Darcy would be alone while the woman he loved moved on with her life. But if there was even an inkling of a possibility, he wanted to take a chance. 

He left his office in haste and asked the driver to prepare the carriage for him. He informed Georgiana that he was going out and that hopefully he would return by nightfall. 

The carriage ride seemed to take forever and Mr. Darcy waited impatiently for them to arrive at your home. He knew this was an unannounced visit and it was as rude as one could be, but he had to know, he could not wait even another second. 

After he knocked on your door, he had half a mind to leave, to abandon this foolish pursuit completely, but before he could give it another moment’s through the door swung open. 

You had to blink a couple times to make sure you were seeing things right. You carried your little brother on your waist and he had his head tucked into your neck, not wanting to expose himself to the stranger in front of him. 

To Mr. Darcy you had never looked more beautiful. 

“I-I do apologize, I realize how rude it is of me to come unannounced.” 

“Yes, quite so,” you nodded, still shocked by his presence. 

“(N/N) who is it?” one of your younger sisters ran to the door to come get a look at their visitor. 

“Iris,” you hissed quietly. “Go back inside.” 

“(Y/N), be nice to your sister,” your mother came to join the three of you by the door all staring at Mr. Darcy. “Sir, you must accept my apology for my daughter’s apparent lack of manners. May I ask who you are?” 

“This is Mr. Darcy, mother, my former employer,” you introduced. 

“Then what is he doing standing outside, please come in.” 

Your mother took no hesitation in pushing you out of the way so that he could enter and by that point, the rest of your sister had gathered around to see what was happening. 

Mr. Darcy stepped into your home and he was able to adequately see what you were describing the night of the ball. Your home was obviously much smaller than Pemberley, but comfortable enough to house you, your mother and your six siblings. He could understand how it might easily get loud and boisterous, but it gave him just that much more insight into you. 

“Might we offer you some tea Mr. Darcy?” your mother asked and Mr. Darcy shook his head. 

“No thank you, but may I ask for a moment of Miss (L/N)’s time? There’s something I wish to discuss with her in private.” 

Before you even had an inch of room to answer, Julia, the sister closest in age to you, swooped in to take Peter out of your arms and pushed you in the direction of Mr. Darcy. 

“Of course, you both can use the sitting room,” she smiled and motioned for the rest of her sisters to follow her upstairs. 

Finding no other option, you led Mr. Darcy into the sitting room. He walked to the opposite side and when you closed the door you crossed your arms over your chest, waiting to hear what he had come all the way from Pemberley to say. 

He stayed silent, unsure of how to string the words together and so you tried to prompt him with a question. 

“How is Georgiana?” 

“She’s well, in good health,” he nodded. 

“And Pemberley?” 

He opened his mouth to say something then paused. 

“It’s not the same.” 

“Why not?” you frowned. 

“It’s not the same without you,” he finally admitted. “The estate is always quiet, Georgiana isn’t engaged in her studies, she misses you, I… I miss you,” 

“Mr. Darcy-,” 

“Please, allow me at least to finish and then if you wish me to leave and never come again I will respect that.” 

You nodded your head, signalling that you were listening and ready to hear what he had to say. 

“When you left you said that it was because you had crossed boundaries and you wanted to own up to your mistakes. I didn’t agree to that from that start, but if that is how you see it then I am just as complicit in crossing those boundaries. I will admit to that, but I crossed those lines because…because…” 

“Why Mr. Darcy?” you stepped closer to him, just a few inches, but it was enough to see the hurt glimmering in his eyes. 

“Because I had fallen in love with you. I still am in love with you. I wish for nothing more than to have you be the first face I see each morning and the last face I see each night. My heart is in agony, ever since you left us, I only wish for that pain to be soothed.” 

Now it was your turn to remain silent. You could feel the tears welling up in your eyes, in all your time spent with Mr. Darcy you could have never imagined that something like this could occur. He was a gentleman of high status and you were just a girl from the country. 

“I know it’s selfish of me to ask of you to come back for this reason, but I would be beside myself if I didn’t ask if you would even consider doing me the honour of becoming my wife.” 

“I-” your voice was caught in your throat as a couple tears escaped from your eyes. “I would gladly take that honour,” you nodded with a sniff, wiping away a few tears and walking up to him and taking his hand in yours. “And I will carry that honour with me as gratitude for allowing me the opportunity to marry the man I love.” 

Mr. Darcy gently lifted his hand to hold your face tilted towards him as you leaned forward to rest your foreheads against each other. His thumb wiped away a few more stray tears before you moved his hand to your lips, pressing a gentle kiss on his fingers. 

“Is there any chance I may convince you to kiss me?” you asked. “If our relationship consists of boundaries crossed we may as well continue to be consistent.” 

Mr. Darcy chuckled and tucked a finger under your chin, allowing his lips to meet your own in a soft kiss filled with love and admiration for one another. 

When you pulled apart, Mr. Darcy couldn’t help but hold your face in his hands, with a twinge of a smile on his lips. 

“My dear, I know it is customary for one to ask for the blessing of the father when getting engaged, but given the circumstances, I would like to ask your family. Would you be alright with that?” 

You nodded your head, and held one of his hands that was pressed against your cheek as you turned to kiss it. 

“I’ll go get them and make some tea while you talk,” you said. 

You didn’t want to let each other go, but you knew for the time being it would be necessary. When you stepped out of the room, as you had predicted your family was gathered around the door, waiting for some sort of news. 

“Mr. Darcy would like to speak to you all,” you said. “I’m going to go make some tea.”

“(N/N) what did he say?” Julia asked.

“I’m sure that will come to light soon enough,” you nodded. “Go on.”

You shooed your siblings off into the room and your mother followed closely behind with a slightly skeptical look on her face. 

You sat and waited patiently in the kitchen with a cup of tea in your hands until when you looked up at the door you saw Mr. Darcy standing at the entrance. 

“Well?” you asked. 

He simply nodded his head and you couldn’t help the grin that had become plastered on your face. 

You had to contain your excitement and simply stood up to meet him and extend your hand for him to take. 

With one look to each other and a simple nod, you were both ready for whatever would come next.

—

The sun peeked through the curtains on a clear Thursday morning, you yawned and stretched, reaching over to your side only to be met with empty covers. As soon as there was a frown on your face you saw your husband emerge from the adjoining room with two glasses of water in his hands and your expression relaxed. 

“Good morning, Mrs. Darcy,” he said softly, placing the glasses on the table next to the bed and taking a seat next to you. 

“Good morning, Mr. Darcy,” you yawned with a chuckle. “Have you been up long?”

He shook his head, “Just a few minutes.”

“Could you stay?” you asked while fixing a few of his tousled curls. 

“Of course,” he nodded and leaned forward to press a kiss to your lips only to be interrupted by the sound of a soft cry coming from the room next door. 

You were in the middle of pushing yourself up to attend to it, but a careful hand was placed on your shoulder and encouraged you to stay down. 

“I’ll get him don’t worry,” he assured you and not even a minute later, Mr. Darcy walked back into the room with your son cradled in his arms. “I think he wants his mother,” he said while watching the little boy squirm. 

“Oh he’s just hungry,” you pushed yourself into a seated position and held your arms out to take the baby while Mr. Darcy came and sat next to you on the other side of the bed. 

Just as you had predicted, the squirming immediately ceased while he was being fed and it made you chuckle. 

“What is it?” Mr. Darcy asked.

“Nothing, it’s just you get cranky too when you’re hungry,” you let a laugh escape while your husband shook his head with a smile. 

“My darling, you wound me,” he teased and you simply smiled back up at him.

“I’m sorry Fitz, what can I say? Like father like son,” you replied as he wrapped an arm around you and he used his free hand to gently stroke his son’s head, suddenly overcome with overwhelming gratitude that he took a chance to be happy. 

[wololo-01]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MRS. WATER!!!!

Yayyyy!!!! It finally here!! It my girl birthday!!! I'm so happy to finally celebrate Mrs. Water birthday <3

But actually that's not all I really want to celebrate and say.....

Oh boi ok long LOOOONG texts above ( there is Also some swearing so be warned too :'b) ↓

(also sorry for interrupting any of you guys!! For the people I tag, you all can just read the part I mentioned you and then skip all the rest!! <3)

*sigh* ok, I'm not going to lie here, since the last 3 years here in this community, it never crossed my mind that I would meet people as incredible, funny, creative and majestic as everyone here,And I'll tell you the truth, this fandom changed me a lot, I didn't imagine this would happen but look, this actually happened hahaha!! XD

To be honest, I had a lot of problems last year and this year too, a lot of shit happened to me and that really discouraged me in a lot of things,I had problems with my self-esteem again and wanted to give up trying anything and life as well I felt useless on several days but you guys, you all cheered me up so much!! I never had the courage to tell you this but if it weren't because of you all I really don't know what I would do :') everything was like: "No one will ever like my style" - BANG! Them find my style cool. "I made this drawing but I don't really think someone will-” BANG! People actually like it a lot “i made this fanart for them but what if then-” BANG! them like it a lot! I'm so happy! :'D

sorry, sorry kakskaak buuut also, There is actually some special people who I want to thank a lot, they are people who of all inspired me to continue and made me so happy:

@bluetorchsky & @androidcharles

YOU TWO.

Since the first time when I moved in to tumblr again to post my thsc art in a old account, I was scared to death that maybe there was no person who knew this game here and my style back then...jesus Christ"; _;, I was really about to gave up until BOOM!! suddenly you both show up in my notifications and I saw the reblog and read the nice tags you guys leave it AND- *slam table* AHHHHHHHHH/p YOU TWO LITERALLY ARE SOOO FREAKING NICE AND AMAZING!!!! Not only that but your both have such extraordinary creative and talent!! You two deserve so much happiness and love!! I was too shy to say this but now damn you both deserve to hear this!!! >:}

Blue your artwork is pretty!! Pretty like the moon and stars shining high in the sky!, your writing is extremely beautiful, like music on a violin or a piano at night or the ones pretty poems Written with so much passion, your writing is extraordinary! You dedicate yourself so much and manage to make a story seem like a book that you are lucky enough to know and read!! And not only that but your ocs, violin and accordion DANG I love how well written they are so much!! They designs are so great yet sooo fabulous and they storys is very veeeery good and greats!!!. I really hope that you continue with those Masterpieces that you write and draw!!, But not only that, but you are such a kind, spectacular and divine person, I really appreciate soooooo muuuch all the things you do here, your writing is done with so much passion and your art is so unique, Don't feel sad or anything just because you can't write or draw at some point, it's totally fine and you deserve all the time but also ALLL THE LOVE AND APPRECIATION in the world! ^^)

Katiee!!! First of all WHERE DID GET SO FREAKING AMAZING IDEAS AND CREATIVE?!?!!???? I SWEAR YOU ARE AMAZING AND FUNNY!!, sometimes I envy you a little, but I also consider you one of my inspirations!!!! Your art is beautiful, beautiful like a painting of flowers or like a clean and calm river, your style is so cuteeeee Those stick people really look like marshmallows!! I so eat your art!! >:3 (kakak sorry), but seriously you are a talented person too, many people here also like you and blue!! You are neat and I glad to be able meet you and your artwork!! (Also I saw that you also writing and it one about your au, I still need to Taste this new delicious write of you 🍽️) when you did the Toppat clan week YIPPEE I GOT SO EXCITED!!! I was scary to not be able to participate but I managed!! I have so much fun drawing all those stuff!!! The prompt You put it was really good also extremely interesting!!!, and talking about something I love so much your ocs!!! Especially Amelia! She such a cuteee cinnamon roll and a adorable blueberry cake!! I love her personality and the design Ohh ESPECIALLY the hair!! Its like a fluffy blue cotton candy!! You super cool, I really appreciate all the work you do, I hope I can see more, you are a talented, funny and absolutely magnificent person!!! Don't forget this!!! >:]

@capturecharlesau & @crown-of-roses-thsc

YOU BOTH ARE MY TWO FAVORITE AU BLOG HAHSHSHAK SUCH CREATIVE, SWEET AND AMAZING PERSON YOU GUY ARE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Minnie!!, you super cool! Like really you such a cool and amazing person!! You also so sweet and kind!!! You like one of those cool kid in the school who I look like at and said "I wanna be like she!! She so awesome!! Yep, she deserves this popularity, she deserves nothing but the best for all things" In the last year, I was really down by some things that happened, but then I saw some one of the chapter you post it and BOOOM!!! Your au is what brings me back the joy!!! AAAAAA I was so hyped about your au!!! Jesus it just so DAMN WELL writing, I love the ideas you have and the characters?? NAHAHAHA THEM ALSO ARE SOOO FREAKING GREAT you manage to combine the words anguish, violence and comfort in such an incredible way! (And snicker you too do!!) Some of your chapters were thrown out at times when I really needed something to distract me, seriously you are a divinely talented person!! And other things I love about your au is Terrence, I'm still a hater of this piece of crap but I want to praise you so much about how you wrote it!! He really was such a good and badass villain/antagonist!!! God, I've even had some nightmares involving him, he really gave me the chills, The way you wrote it from start to finish was AMAZING, I swear I still love rereading it all again, to me it's like a frollo like the hunchback of Notre Dame with a bit of the personality of Clayton from Tarzan or Ursula from the little mermaid!! (Sorry they all are one of my favorite villains), Another thing I love so much are your ocs! Not only Danny but I can also say allwork and Benz!! AHHH THEM ALL ARE SUCH COOL OCS!!! I also need to say you are amazing when it comes to writing about Characters!! I really wanna know so much more about them all!!, Danny is still my favorite (he so lovely and sweet, he and you deserve the world) but either way, I thankful for you get in this fandom :') you deserve so much loveee and appreciation!! You made wanna go back in training more cartoon styles and expression because of your artstyle who is perfect!!!! I and everyone here will love to see your next works and arts!!! DON'T FORGET WHO FREAKING NICE AND AMAZING YOU ARE!!!!

Snicker!!!! (Hope it okay to call you that)) *sigh*.....

I WOULD LIKE TO GIVE A MEDAL FOR THE BEST AU THAT IS BEING WRITTEN.

Wow, God, how can I put into words in English how good she is??? I won't even be able to describe it in Portuguese CUZ GODDAMN YOU HAVE SUCH A POWER TO WRITE SOMETHING SO GOOOOOD😭😭 think I can say you and have the absolutely talens of god and the creative of a Talented artist who deserves much more appreciation and great recognition!!! When you showed up I was having a few bad days but YOUR AU SUDDENLY FELL FROM THE SKY AND WAS IMMEDIATELY BLESSED TO READ SUCH THE MAGNIFICENT MASTERPIECE!!! I love sooo much the idea of ​​Ellie being Terrence daughter It such a cool and think I can say, a really original ideas (I mean about ellie being Terence daughter, not Terrence having a child "^^) I also adore so much all the personalities of each, RHM is one of my favorites, I'm also curious about his story and the others, I can't forget to talk about the villain!, AAAAAA YOUR TERRENCE IT'S SO NEAT!!! I also still his hater but you done such a good job with him gave the big vibe of two-face villain or the cocky anger issues one (idk what it the name for this one XD) but seriously? Meeen I wish I could could puch him just like rogue from jewel au from @smoresthehalloweenqueen ((Smore you also another of my inspiration and favorite artist!! >:3)) and CC!terrence, for me rogue, CC!Terrence and CoRTerrence are pretty good villains but make Blood boils so much just by seeing them but hey hey! This why I love villains you like them very much but wish them all just die soon (cc!Terrence was one Only these two are missing and I can't wait to see them all in hell ahahaha >:D) you really are spectacular, take the time you need to do the chapters, but I wanna to said that you are also my new Big inspiration!!

@00lari00

LARIIIII FINALMENTE EU TENHO UMA AMIGA BR NESSE FANDOM!!! DEUS É BOM DE DEMAAAAAAAAIS PORRA 🙌🙌

Akaskska sorry XDD but I serious!! I so happy to be the only brazillian person here in the fandom on tumblr!! It sucks sometimes not having someone who speaks the same language as you to talk :'''b but suddenly A SMOKE ARISED AND SUDDENLY FROM BEHIND, WIZARD LARI FINALLY ARRIVED!!! HOORAY!!!! Lari we can not talk to much since you busy with your school and I am a shy idiot but I need to said, HOLY SHIT YOU ARE THE MOST FUCKING COOL PERSON I HAVE HAD THE PLEASURE OF KNOWING, YOUR ART AND CREATIVITY ARE LIKE MAGIC COMING TRUTH!!! And this au you are creating??? É MUITO FODAAAAAA 😩😭🤌🤌🤌 CARALHO VEI TU TA FAZENDO UMA OBRA PRIMA ESPERO QUE VC NÃO PARE!!! É MUITO INCRÍVEL TUDO QUE VC TA FAZENDO!!! (Sorry back to English KAJSKS) I can't lie to you, I sometimes envy you, you are such a special, kind and incredible person. It's like I'm talking like the coolest maid ever and I think 'god they're so cool why they are even talking to me?, but I also see you as one of my big inspirations!! I know I will reach the same level as you in talent and art but I at least want to have some of your courage to talk to people and be good at drawing just like YOUU!!I also want you to remember that you are so wonderful and a very magnificent and awesome person!! Anyone who talk shit about you and one it's a hater because them never gonna be in the same way as you are!!! Also take all the time you need it for draw, study is also important I am here to let you know that I'm rooting for you every day!! I can see you Gonna have a bright and wonderful future, thank you for being my friend and also so being my inspiration

And now a really special one...a person who I am very very grateful...

@doodlethings

Bunnu?, omg I think I will cry (I already am since I'm writing all this) YOU. HOLY SHIT BUNNU I SWEAR HOW DARE YOU BE THE COOLEST, AMAZING, SENSATIONAL, WONDERFUL, KIND, AMAZING PERSON??? WHAT THE FUCK, I WISH I COULD GIVE YOU THE FUCKING WORLD, GIVE YOU EVERYTHING YOU DESEVE IT AND MORE THAN THE WORLD CAN OFFER TO YOU, In fact, how long have we been glued to each other? Type 4?? 5?? Or 6 years?? Oof time passed so quickly I lost count ;_; but well fuck it! The most important thing I want want to said is, YOU ARE SUCH DIVINE ARTIST AND WRITER!!! YOUR ART IS AS WONDERFUL AS A LIVING PAINTING A MUSE PAINTING, And this art deserves to be featured, every detail of it is so impeccable and incredible, and your writing? They are like a special, treasured book that deserves to be read, even if no one does, I will, I will appreciate your art and I will read your stories for the rest of my life, again and again and again, You are like a sunshine or flowers in the snow, you are my bestie, my favorite person in the world!! And you are my biggest inspiration to continue drawing, you have cheered me up all these years and continue to this day, you have the best sense of humor and music of all, your gave so wanna tips and help me a lot to deal with live and learn to love and appreciate more the things!! If wasn't because of you? Geez I really don't know but this doesn't matter, you are the best, intelligence and great yet sweetly and maravilinda person in this WHOOOOOLE WORLD!!! I LOVE YOU!! THANK YOU FOR BEING MY BEST FRIEND AND BE AND TALK WITH ME TO THIS DAY, I'm sorry about my horrible sense of humor, my delulu theories, lack of brain cells and Also because they heard the stupidest story I tell it ksskskajk you got a bored dumb friend :'b but I happy to be on your side until now and I can't wait to see you shine more <'3

Oh and for the people I didn't tag and said here

I'm sorry I can't tag all of you 😭😭 if tag more people here this post will be post only a few weeks later akajsj BUT DON'T THINK JUST BECAUSE I DIDN'T TAG YOU GUYS IT MEAN I FINDA ANY OF YOU SO NEAT AND AMAZING!!! YOU GUYS SUPPORT AND LOVE THAT YOU ALL GAVE ME HAVE A SPECIAL PLACE IN MY HEART!!! A LOT (almost everyone) OF YOU ARE ALSO MY INSPIRATIONS!!! YOU LOVE EVER BLOG, DRAW, THEORY, WRITINGS AND AUS THAT YOU ALL DO!!! KEEP SHINING AND GOING EVERYONE CUZ YOU GUYS ARE FABULOUS 💞💞💞 💅 I WANNA SUPPORT AND LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU!!! YOU GUYS DESERVE A LOOOOOOOOOOOT OF MORE THAN I CAN OFFER AND SAID DO NEVER FORGET WHO COOL AND BEAUTIFUUUUUUL YOU ALL ARE!!!! 🗣️📢

You knows? Today also is my birthday and there is It's a tradition in Brazil where, when someone has a birthday, after congratulations and lighting the candles, the person gives the first piece of cake to someone important, but all of you are important to me soooo...Since this is the internet not real life, I wanna pass several first pieces to each of you all!!!! SO GRAB ONE GUYS!!! NYEHEHEHEHEHE 🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰🍰 >:DDD

Well this all I can actually said, happy birthday again Mrs. Water and Happy birthday to me!!

Also have I got this stupid idea her ajakskdkk xb