#if im going to suffer at least let it mean something- if i die at least let it be because i could have succeeded

[fluxedbuds]

Evidence against the Hermatrix

I don’t like it

[omegalomania]

the thing that truly Truly unhinges me about infinity on high is that it is not simply an album about the horrible stomach-wrenching rollercoaster of fame and it is not solely an album about wrestling with your demons but it is a marriage of those two it is very much about fighting the worst parts of yourself in the most public avenues available. it's an album that all but rattles with the amount of references there are to medication. every seeming bout of narcissism is undercut with a sardonic twist and the snap of subtle self-loathing brimming beneath.

and the worst part of it is how that isn't even the worst part of it. the worst part of it for me is the fear. the fear of becoming something other than what you are. the fear of getting better. because this is how the world likes you - broken and stripped down to your ugly parts and embittered and exposed. this is how the world wants you, consumes you, because it's in your brokenness that they pick out such pretty patterns like finding rainbows in shards of glass. it's your wrecked-up brain with all its sporadic misfirings that draws everyone to you like moths to a faulty porchlight. i only keep myself this sick in the head 'cause i know how the words get you off. infinity on high. van gogh, the poster child for the ethos of creating something even at your lowest points. the poster child for the speculative, horrifying ethos of how your flaws and faults and fuck-ups are the only things worth keeping. how often have we seen that rhetoric. if van gogh wasn't depressed, we wouldn't have gotten starry night.

on september 15th 2006 at 9:08pm est pete wentz answered a fan question about what accomplishment of his he is proudest of.

I don’t really think about success or accomplishments too often. I guess just being around. Letting myself move past who I used to be- because that person was continually unhappy. Or at least trying to get to that point and not feel like im “changing for the worse” just because im letting myself feel ok. 10 years ago I didn’t listen to anything anyone said ever for the most part.

on september 18th 2006 at 2:36am est pete wentz wrote on one of his blogs how infinity on high was beginning to feel like a "nocturnal record" as it began to take shape.

somehow the things we say mean more in corners of dancefloors and we focus on love below the waist and outside of the head. "dont you want to get better"- i just dont want you to worry. "dont you want to get better" - tonight i do. the way they say "youre committing slow suicide" when someone lights up or cuts loose. but arent we all. everything we do just shortens our life, every breath is one less. but its what makes everything so treasured. in my head. it aint a funeral babe, i just want the headline to die. recovery is the new drug.

it hurts sometimes thinking about who he was in that moment. someone so fucking scared of getting better and desperate to get better, committing every flaw and insecurity he had to paper and trying to make art out of how desperately he fucking hated himself. as if his pain was the only compelling thing about him.

that's what kills me about this record. truly. it's not just about the perils and pitfalls of fame and renown. it's about how it feels, really feels, to think that your fame is reliant on you fucking hating yourself and how that is killing you.

and yet. infinity on high. a title taken from words written in 1888, from van gogh to his brother, as he talks about how his improving health has had a positive effect on his art.

Be clearly aware of the stars and infinity on high. Then life seems almost enchanted after all.

van gogh did not give us starry night because he was depressed and suicidal and falling apart. van gogh did not make incredible works of art because of how much he was suffering. van gogh created in spite of that, because he had a brother who loved him and reasons to keep going.

pete wentz did not write some of his best lyrics on infinity on high because he was depressed and suicidal and falling apart. he wrote them in spite of that, because he had people in his life who loved him and over 15 years later he is still alive, he has 3 kids, he has his band who have been together for over 20 years and still love making music together, and at least externally, he no longer feels the need to self-immolate so the onlookers can make pretty patterns from the ashes left over.

[the-s1lly-corner]

What would happen if eyeless jacks s/o was being targeted by the cult that killed him? (Or remaining members from the cult) like somehow the stars aligned and they somehow found him and his s/o, and chose to target them since yk...going after a human would be a lot easier then going after him

Hunted (Eyeless Jack x reader being tracked by the cult hcs)

you. anon. points. shakes you (/pos) im loving the ej requests and honestly this one!! already love it and im hoping i can do the idea justice!! dont get me wrong i love the basic romance prompts but the drama and action that can come from prompts like this??? WOOOOOOO

no because imagine some of the remaining members track him down as you proposed. regardless of if they find him through sightings or tracking down his "feeding grounds", they find where he lives. and in turn also find his.. partner

ive got multiple ideas for this so bare with me

idea one: imagine they find you and him together and manage to overpower you both... i think at this point they would view jack as a lost cause and... try to put him down for lack of better wording. they already failed with him with the sacrifice and trying to get that demon they worship to take over his body... though did the ritual even fail? i mean something definitely happened, but... shrugs. too many things to dive into for this prompt but!! but imagine if they decide to use you as a new sacrifice

even worse what if they cant actually kill jack, be it because he cant be killed in any normal means or they dont have the means to do him in.. and hes made to watch. imagine what would be going through his mind. regardless of if you are a successful sacrifice, or youre botched like jack, or you simply die...

on the chance its successful, would it even be fair to say that its still you in there? i mean your body is literally being used as a skin puppet for... something else... gone and disgraced. but if you end up like jack, i think it would be worse. at least with the other option he can say you passed away or that there is hope to get you back.. but you being like him just makes his skin crawl. it feels more final, more personal. he would never wish what had happened to him onto you.. and yet, here you are. i think death, as much as it would hurt and destroy him, would at least give him some finality that you wont have to suffer. many feelings here you know. and again, this is assuming hes forced to watch everything to go down

Idea two: hes captured and you go looking for him... i think, since the cult doesnt know youre around they try to do the ritual right on jack... if it can even be redone.. probably leads to you trying to rush in and get jack out of there; ultimately ending in you either being used as the sacrifice or being offed before the option can even be considered

Idea three: you're taken while waiting for jack at his home. youre ambushed while your partner is away and taken. there will definitely be signs of a struggle and break in, but jack probably wouldnt have many leads of where you went. cursing him to live the rest of his life trying to search for you and figure out what happened to you. on the chance that you survived and returned to him, theres going to be so many questions... and so many more if the ritual was botched..

theres just so many ways to go about this but none of the outcomes and routes sound desirable as they all end in death and tragedy. either someones getting possessed, cursed, or killed... not very good...

but as i reread your request, i come up with another idea. what if they scope you out, by yourself. like how they originally would have done to jack to get him to drop your guard... imagine youre none the wiser, in fact you even talk about your new 'friends' to jack; and he, stupidly, decides to let you have your privacy. can you imagine the guilt that would hit him when the cycle repeats itself and you become a victim? i think he wouldnt know at first, just that youve stop coming to him for a while... i mean he doesnt exactly have many ties to the world outside of his little bubble at home, how could he ever find out?

[yakumtsaki]

It’s the morning after Felina’s birthday disaster and the bozo bros are interrupted on their way to work-

-BY TWO SEPARATE THUNDER FIRES. HOLY HELL. Xander, I get that undying loyalty is the dog unique selling point, but could you please stop following these morons as they run towards the fire??

-Oh wow bro, that was a close one! -I cant’ believe none of us has died in a fire yet with how many of them we’re getting! -Tell me about it! It’s like something is trying to kill us!

Um ya, your own stupidity?? Just go to work. 

-Look at us, Servilia, two old ladies and still so limber, huhu!🌸 

Ok Cyn I’m starting to worry with all your wholesome pet interactions, don’t you wanna hook up with at least iVan?? I mean he’s right there!

-I don’t know, what’s the point of romantic interactions without Don here to catch me cheating?😔💗

Aw Cyn, so loyal, up there with Xander!

20K?!? FFS SANDY, at this point it’s literally costing us money to keep your dumb zombie ass employed.

-̵B̴U̶T I̷ G̵O̴T P̴R̴O̵M̵O̶T̷E̷D A̴N̸Y̵W̸A̷Y🧟‍♀️

Ya and made 3k total, so you still owe me 17k!

-̵A̸N̵D̷ Y̴O̶U O̷W̵E̴ M̷E̴ M̸Y L̴I̷F̴E🧟‍♀️

Ok well, we’ll call it even!

Look who finally managed to get an A+ now that he didn’t opt out of school.

-One day was all it took me, IN YOUR FACE, FAILINA

Ugh.

-Uncle Sugar look, I finally bested Failina! 

Felina always had good grades, what you did was finally REACH her.

-Great job, buddy! Now go take your nap and Uncle Sugar will be here to train you tomorrow for your big birthday fight!

Your big what?

-Failina is obviously going to counterattack and ruin MY upcoming birthday, idiot, so we’re training for it and I’M GONNA DESTROY HER. MUAHAHAHA. Now if you’ll excuse me it’s time for my nap-nap time with gram-gram.

Barth how can you be so wholesome and such a demon at the same time, I can’t. 

-Ah, nothing better than just standing here, getting drunk in this open space while it’s raining!

Sounds good to me, time to leave you unattended for even a second and go wash the dogs with Sophie-

-um, Sugar, why is your portrait missing from our family panel??

SUGAR??? SUGAR WTF

-With my last breath.. I’m gonna use this death animation as aesthetically as possible.. and slide down the bathroom wall..

OH MY GOD WHAT

OH MY GOD IT’S REAL WHAT IS HAPPENING 

-WAAAAAAAAAAAH BRO NOOOOOOOOO

WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED IM

-WHY SUGAR WHY. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DIE FOR NO CLEAR REASON 

MY THOUGHTS EXACTLY WHAT ON EARTH. I HAVE NO IDEA HOW HE DIED

-Ok can you people take this somewhere else, I’m trying to admire myself here. 

-WAAAAH first my husband and now my nephew noooooo🌸

CYN PLEASE NOT NOW. Bro literally HOW did Sugar die, I feel he was struck by lighting or something and then made it to the bathroom and crawled up to die there?? I mean what the-

NO. NO WAY. JOJO.

-Hello :)

YOU KILLED SUGAR???

-Well all the fires weren’t working so I had to get creative!

OH MY GOD

-Great job, grandpa Jojo! Let me just clean all the death stink from in here..

YOU TWO ARE INSANE

-Grandma Sophie helped too, why do you think she rolled the want to wash the dogs?

OH MY GODDDD YOU ARE ALL PSYCHOS. Well whatever cause you know what?? Where others see a problem.. 

..I see a romantic opportunity! 

-Please don’t do this, we have suffered enough.

You really haven’t, now get dialing!

-̶I̵'̵M A̶L̷I̸V̵E̵!!!🧟

You got that about right!

-W̵H̴Y̴ A̴M ̵I̵ G̷R̸E̸Y. ̸O̵H̸ N̶O.F̴U̶C̴K̷ Y̶O̴U̴, A̷U̸N̴T̵ S̶H̸A̶J🧟

-😠😠😠😠😠

Welp.. You look great! 

Real talk, I STILL don’t know how Sugar died, he doesn’t have a memory of seeing a ghost OR being hit by lighting! Spontaneous combustion?? Wtf

-H̶E̸Y̴ ̵S̵A̷N̴D̸Y̶, N̸O̷T̴I̷C̴E A̵N̶Y̸T̴H̸I̶N̴G̵ D̴I̶F̷F̷E̶R̵E̸N̴T🧟 -I̴ ̸D̵O̵N̸'̴T̷, I̵ A̸L̸W̴A̷Y̵S H̶A̵V̵E T̸H̴I̶S S̵H̸O̵C̷K̴E̵D̵ A̴N̸D̴ A̷P̵P̵A̵L̶L̶E̷D̵ E̶X̸P̸R̶E̵S̸S̴I̷O̴N̷ ̶O̶N̴ M̴Y̸ F̴A̸C̷E🧟‍♀️

SANDY NO. PLEASE ACCEPT THE NEW HIM OTHERWISE I BROUGHT HIM BACK FOR NOTHING.

-Y̴O̷U̴'̶R̴E̸ E̵V̷E̷N̸ H̴O̵T̷T̴E̴R̵ N̷O̴W̶, Y̵O̵U̸ ̷B̴I̸G̶ ̵R̶O̷T̸T̴I̵N̴G H̴U̵N̶K🧟‍♀️

OH THANK GOD. Let’s take you crazy zombie kids out on a proper date!!!

-̴H̸E̶R̴E̶'̵S̴ T̷O̵ U̸S̴ A̴N̵D̵ A̸ ̵C̸L̴A̵S̷S̸Y̴ ̶R̶O̶M̵A̴N̵T̵I̵C E̶V̸E̶N̵I̷N̶G̵🧟 -C̸L̷I̷N̷K̴ ̷C̸L̴I̸N̵K̴🧟‍♀️

-N̶O̸M̷ ̴N̶O̶M̴🧟‍♀️   -G̶O̶O̴D B̸R̷A̵I̵N̸S̵ T̶O̶N̶I̶G̷H̷T🧟

Ya ok I officially ship it.

CUTE❤️

AWWWWW🧟‍♀️❤️🧟

-̴I̷ L̶O̴V̴E̸ Y̷O̷U S̷A̶N̵D̶Y̵, W̸E̵ H̶A̴D̸ T̸O̷ D̴I̷E̵ S̶O̵ W̴E̵ C̷O̸U̷L̶D ̵B̸E̸ T̷O̴G̵E̵T̷H̷E̵R🧟 -W̴E̷L̵L I̸ D̵I̸D̸N̴'̷T H̴A̷V̷E̷ T̸O D̴I̵E T̸W̴I̸C̵E🧟‍♀️ -B̷O̵T̸H̴ Y̴O̶U̷R̸ D̵E̴A̸T̴H̴S̴ W̴E̸R̴E G̴R̷A̶N̷D̶P̴A̵ J̵O̶J̵O̷'̷S̴ F̷A̵U̸L̸T̴ A̸N̶D N̴O̸W̷ H̴E̷ ̷K̶I̷L̸L̸E̴D̴ M̶E T̸O̵O🧟 -Y̶O̷U̶'̵R̸E R̷I̵G̶H̸T̴,W̴E̵ ̵O̶W̷E̸ O̴U̸R̸ H̶A̸P̵P̸I̸N̷E̸S̵S̶ T̸O H̵I̵M🧟‍♀️ -I̶ W̷A̸S A̵L̸W̷A̴Y̴S H̴I̸S F̷A̷V̸O̶R̵I̶T̸E🧟

[chipjrwibignaturals]

I will say— i haven’t gotten to it yet, because im bad at this, but— i want to state my surface level thoughts when it comes to chip Dying

bc like to me chip has always been a cockroach. no matter what he goes through, it won’t kill him. in some ways as a cruel cosmic joke, a cyclic tragedy, he’s destined to forever exist. he’s been given an impossible task, to find arlin, and he’s not allowed to stop. he’ll just keep going and wallowing in it aimlessly forever, he’s not allowed even the decency of death. in the same way he breaths air, chip jrwi keeps on living — it’s just what he does, how he is.

and it felt extra validated with when he considered quitting while Gill was gone. he felt like his own presence was bringing down the people around him, that it was his fault gillion was gone— so he was going to leave to save them from himself and just… sail. he knows leaving means giving up his only real tangible lead to find arlin, what he wants, but he also can’t risk them so he’ll just take a boat and… wander listlessly. Hope for maybe something good to stumble upon. god has cursed him and his work is never finished, etc etc.

so when i first heard abt Chip’s situation i was admittedly… not super into it? definitely contributed to why i got so far behind tbh, i wasn’t looking forward to it. it crashed hard against my perception of chip’s character & his narrative. hes destined to be a tragedy and that tragedy is because he’s alive

and I’ll be the first to say depending on handling i still may dislike the choice BUT I’ve made my own way around to enjoying the choice (even if it wouldn’t be my first choice)

first off, in some ways i feel like chip was also of the belief that he would just… keep living. no matter what happened to him. he’d “have a plan” and find some way to slip out, then restart and try again. he knows the universe seems to love to watch him suffer, so he just…. doesnt really think he can die. at least not like that.

it’s the very violation of the expectations I established, experienced in and out of character. it feels abrupt, wrong. that’s not what was set up for him! …until you realize that he changed first.

since the black rose, chip was seated with the fate of forever searching and trying to capture a past he can’t have. but it’s only through his experiences with jay and gillion and his OWN crew that he… grows past that. he makes peace with what he’s lost, or at least starts to, and allows for new growth in that spot. he’s regained a family to rely on, he’s growing comfortable and moving on. he’s losing the tragedy-angle of his own life— so he dies. his fate is absolute and it is black, it is a tragedy no matter what. this is the narrative retaliating against him for trying for better than he was allotted.

it’s worse too because he’s so close to finding arlin, to being able to finally put all this behind him and get closure. it’s all salt in the wound. leading him on, letting him regain his hope, giving him peace… only to snatch it all away. what a cruel, cruel joke.

[syscultureis]

Plural culture is I just dont get it...why do endos want to be this? and why do people think others want or are faking all of this? Plural culture is I cant LIKE anything anymore. Plural culture is even if im ACTIVLY TRYING to not split and to ignore it all and just keep on keeping on and pretend my system isnt there I STILL split. I cant sit down and enjoy my day because my brain will take SOMETHING, ANYTHING, NOT EVEN A PERSON SOMETIMES and if I got enjoyment or even suffering out of it then its just THERE now and a part of me is missing. Plural culture is missing parts of yourself, loosing a skill or talent you loved that shaped who you were, forgetting the faces and voices of your loves ones, getting your memories rewriten for you, blinking and missing days or sometimes years. And thats just MY experience as host! Others in my system having to live their lives in the backseat, never being able to have one of their own or feeling like their hole point of existence is to make me happy or make sure we dont die. Sometimes I see how tired and drained the protectors are, how strung out the care takers are, the gatekeepers putting on a brave face for the good of the system to make us feel like maybe at least ONE of us has SOME kind of control only to find out that even they dont know everything or have control over it all. I see alters who are dating in our system wish and beg for a body just so they can hold hands like normal. Or others still who have had relationships outside the system wish they had a body independent of this one to go and be with who they want and do whatever they want. Its NOT all suffering and disorder yes of course and thats so very valid but like...even the most well adjusted systems deal with flashbacks, triggers, panic attacks I mean for fuck sake its not just some fun game or even a coping skill! Id RATHER NOT split or disassociate to be able to cope! Honestly id MUCH RATHER do things myself then switch but unfortunately I simply CANT no matter how much I want to! I HATE how low our split tolerance is because SPLITTING ISNT FUCKING FUN even when its painless! Even when its so subtle you dont notice! Because you loose something, a memory, your feelings, your sense of self gets rocked off its balance and honestly sometimes not knowing a split happed is WORSE cause youll just randomly start feeling like your not you anymore with no explanation as to why! Its so frustrating to see a bunch of people emulate the "fun parts" of my disorder and then when I get RIGHTFULY upset and say "hey its not like that it actually kinda sucks" they turn around and emotionally manipulate a group of people who are NUTORIOUS for not being believed by saying "Well because no one believes you then you should believe me because everyone has a different brain so actually I say that you dont need to be traumatized and have any of the bad shit your talking about and I get to have all the cool parts of it and your trying to oppress me by not letting me in your spaces" like???? Okay, so sorry for the rant and talking about endos and systemcorse and all. Sometimes it just all seems so ridiculous to me. When I see people say "real systems arnt hurt by people faking DID" and like??? no??? dont fucking speak for me???? Like yes stop fakeclaiming but like no dont say endos arnt "real systems problem" like I guess in practice sure but no and also BIG NO cause enods directly HAVE caused me problems so no, fuck that.

.

[caitie-likes-talking]

Part 4 Critique: Everything I'd Change

I love DIU..however, I consider it one of the post flawed of the JJBA Parts. Honestly, I feel like Araki didn't fully know where he was going with it til halfway, which is why the plot can be so janky. No matter what, let's dive into it. First, characters.

(also quick disclaimer: this is all my opinion and i am biased for MANY things.)

if u diagree w me dont tell me i think it would crush me

Characters [Josuke, Jotaro, Okuyasu, Kira]

Josuke Higashikata

I LOVE Josuke. I think he's a lovely character concept and his design is really cool. My main problem with him is literally his LACK of screen time!! He is the Jojo of this part, yet his spotlight is constantly stolen by other side characters like Koichi, Rohan, and even Jotaro. This also happened a lot in Part 3, with it basically being the Polnareff show (idk why Araki did this sm in pts3-5...either let the mc have screen time or don't have them be the mc!!)

I think Josuke had some of the most missed opportunities in DIU. Especially with his relationships with other characters. I think this part could've been way more interesting if it chose a solid theme, and one that I think would've made sense is commentating on death & tragedy and how that can impact personal relationships. The reason I believe this is because there's already easy set ups for this in the story. Ryohei's death, The Nijimura Brother's family, Reimi, Shigechi, and Jotaro all have that theme in place, but not enough connecting points or real arcs related to this. What was the point of killing off Ryohei (who was the only father figure Josuke had growing up) if you're not going to show how this impacted Josuke, Tomoko, and how he acts with others besides one single page? Sure, it taught him that his powers have limits and that he can't save everyone, but that was a stupid thing to teach him because Okuyasu doesn't fucking die when he should've!! Like why did we make an arc saying 'hey stands aren't magic they can't bring ppl back to life' just for EXACTLY THAT to happen??

Moving on, I also have problems with his stand. I LOVE Crazy Diamond, I think it has a super cool design and power concept, but personally I wish it's powers were more grounded and had clear limits. I feel like a lot of stands suffer from this treatment of vague power limits (ex: Golden Wind..) but my problem with CD is that there were MANY opportunities to add one! For example: we know Josuke couldn't bring back Ryohei even after using his stand on him. So that bears the question: what can CD not fix? What is the real reason it can't bring a dead person back to life? Jotaro says "No stand has the power to bring back the dead" WHY?? am i missing something? Have I forgotten when it was officially established that stands cant do that? I mean, literally in part 3 there was a stand that could reanimate corpses. So does it have to do with the soul? No matter what, I would've used this moment to establish that CD can't bring back ANY living thing. I actually wrote a short fic abt this and included the fact that he also couldn't "fix" a dead leaf. I feel like overall his stand needed more grounding.

Also, I have beef with Josuke's backstory, but I'll get into that later.

Jotaro Kujo

Ok firstly, I have MAJOR beef with his design in part 4. Mainly the fact that he's drawn extremely pale in the anime. Like..obviously he COULD be pale as he is wasian (im not trying to say all wasian ppl look the same), but he is TAN in part 3. Why did they take that away?? Pisses me off to the extreme. At least they fixed it in p5+6. Anyways..

Character wise, I really enjoy Jotaro's personality in p4. I like how he's mellowed out in comparison to p3. However, I feel like he needed a more clear role in the story. He showed up to figure out grandpappy's shit, and then took the leader role when facing Kira. Why don't I like this? Because most of the time Jotaro was just..there. I think Araki wanted him and Josuke to have a mentor/student relationship (ex: rat episode) but just didn't focus enough on them or Josuke training with his stand for this to work.

Also, the fact that it took Jotaro so fucking long to figure out who Kira is WITH the help of all those other stand users is so goofy. Like him and the gang back in '89 found Dio's ass from a goddamn microscopic fly in a photo but couldn't find Kira's identity?? Like ugh he almost redeemed himself with the button thing but then he got blown up like gosh what happened king

When it comes to stands, I forever find it stupid that Jotaro didn't work with his stand to become more powerful. Araki just had to nerf him (which is something he does with most reoccurring characters, ex: Joseph). I don't like it and it pisses me off.

With the death of Ryohei, I feel like it would've made more sense for Jotaro to somewhat open up to Josuke and be a bit more sympathetic towards him about it (or maybe he stays closed off until Josuke explodes, causing Jotaro to reveal the truth about his past.) Either way, I think the two of them could've bonded over shared grief.

Okuyasu Nijimura

I absolutely ADORE Okuyasu. I think his dynamic with Josuke is really fun to watch and his personality is just overall super enjoyable.

Stand wise I do think Araki slightly nerfed him by making him dumb as fucking rocks, but I let this slide a little more just bc he's a side character..

I honestly think Okuyasu has the best character arc out of the whole part 4 cast. I think he definitely deserved more screen time, but what we got was really solid in my opinion. His relationship with his brother was well developed and it was really interesting to see how it still affected him even after his brother's death. The way he felt a need to get revenge for his brother and still felt like he wasn't enough really hit me in the gut. I love him.

When it comes to Okuyasu's "death" I have very mixed opinions. On the one hand, ofc the goat of part 4 survived. On the other hand, I feel like him surviving goes directly against the idea we've been given since the beginning. You can't save everyone. And on the one hand, I enjoy the subverting of expectations. On the other hand, I don't like how it's still just never fully explained. I guess in JJBA as long as your soul doesn't feel like dying yet, you won't. I wish we saw Okuyasu actually speaking to his brother when he "died" however. I find him and Keicho's relationship really gut-punching and that would've been a fire scene imo.

I have more to say on him, his dad, Keicho, and the arrow, but I'll save that for when I'm talking about the plot.

Yoshikage Kira

I find Kira to be a really interesting villain. I really enjoyed every moment we got going deeper into his psychology and it's something I really wish we got to see more of. I enjoy his sleek design and he's fine asf tbh.

Im not gonna give commentary on his stand rn bc honestly i dont fully remember how that shit worked by the time he was using the arrow

Character wise I just really wish he was established as the main villain sooner. The build up and hints dropped about him were so addictive, so it's disappointing that they're only there a little before his full introduction.

The psychology of Kira is something I really liked. The way he truly believes he's never really done anything wrong and only wanting to live a peaceful life is something I wish was even more looked into. Also, correct me if I'm wrong, but from my memory, in the manga Kira's whole thing with his nails growing quicker when stressed/when his need to kill is getting too strong was only psychological. At least, I don't remember them growing the same way it's shown in the anime. I think this would've been something really interesting to deep dive into. The fact that he believes his nails grow when his need to kill is really high is really intriguing and the overall connection between hands and his killings are something I wanted to be fully developed more. I know it was kind of just a weird ass fetish but like..that's interesting!! this is interesting!!

I'll probably make an individual post to talk more abt him.

Plot

Where do I even begin. The plot of part 4 is all over the place. I loved many episodes, and I enjoyed when it leaned more into the slice of life style, but why the fuck where there like 3 seperate plots? Honestly, cut out Anjuro. His whole plot shit was annoying as hell. Didn't care for him.

Akira's entire plot pissed me off. I only like this arc because of Okuyasu. Overall I found there to be a lot of plot holes and just annoying parts. Everything til Kira was like this for me. Like get to the REAL plot please.

The arrow annoyed me. I've never wanted to rip my hair out more than when Kira's dad got a hold of it. He was SO GODDAMN ANNOYING. I like the concept of Kira using the arrow to get allies or ways to cover up his plot, but most of the stand users that came out of this were annoying and Kira's dad was insufferable in the worst way possible.

I think something I wish was more covered by the plot is the aftermath of Part 3 and Dio in general. This is something that CDDH (best jojo spinoff) covers really nicely, however. Go read it.

I also just in general think more should've been done w Okuyasu's dad, as he is a direct aftermath of Dio.

I feel like a lot of the women in Part 4 were set up to have strong, actually plot-influencing roles, but then were totally side-lined. I'm going to make a full post abt this tho.

Reimi being connected to Rohan never made sense to me. Just narratively speaking, why did you connect the main motivation for catching Kira to a side antagonist instead of the main character? This is slightly fueled by my hate for Rohan but like, c'mon! I think it would've made more sense to 1. just not include Rohan so fucking much and 2. connect Reimi to Josuke's past.

Speaking of Josuke's past, I feel like it just..needed more. Or at least, I think something needed to be done with the boy who saved him. I can appreciate the idea of it connecting to a theme of the general kindness of strangers, but you don't see that theme pop up as much in the rest of the plot. Also, I again would've connected Reimi to Josuke because WHY ISN’T SHE CONNECTED TO THE MAIN CHARACTER OH MY GOD

Overall tho I like the vibes of part 4, i really enjoyed different arcs and characters, and I just wish Araki got more time to flesh everything out and refocus on certain themes and characters.

[2n2n]

i know we're all waiting for tsukasa to full on sob at some point (cmon let the girlie cry,,,) which made me wonder! what sorta things do you think could make him start crying? hes so.... easygoing/takes everything in his stride that im really curious lol

I think Tsukasa is an unconventional sort of person, so I think along the lines of what he does and doesn't experience, what he does and doesn't expect...

Tsukasa has never been afraid to die, so things that seem scary, dangerous, especially to children, usually don't do anything, and never have.

He's used to people calling him annoying, or weird or crazy, or wishing he would go away. So that sort of thing doesn't phase him. Another day being Tsukasa.

He's even used to the concept of being hated...

If you asked me… I think the opposite of all of that could make Tsukasa cry... like....

Amane finally being direct, and telling him "I love you", or describing his importance, or the things he loves about him-- I don't think Tsukasa is ready to hear something like that... I don't know if he conceptualizes it.

Perhaps, in the same vein, Nene-chan feeling openly sad for him, I don't think he would expect. Nene-chan being kind and friendly towards him, maybe, or wanting to get to know him, or wishing things could be better, or expressing that she doesn't want him to die, or observing that he's lonely … nobody outside of Amane and Tsukasa have really observed what goes on between them, and Amane doesn't share his thoughts much. Nene-chan could offer unique perspective he's not able to imagine on his own. I feel that could touch him.

I think about … the chronically ill brother in Takase-Bune who only sees himself as a burden… who kills himself to free his brother from their sorry life… so that at least one of them can have a chance at something...

or the scorpion in Night on the Galactic Railroad, whos life has only hurt others, and so, it wants its death to provide joy to others at last…

Because AidaIro-sensei have referenced both of these things, and even particularly drawn Tsukasa as the scorpius constellation…explicitly the remorseful, now burning scorpion... mm … how often has anyone really offered praise and adoration to Tsukasa? Been grateful for him? Thanked him just for being there, being alive? Amane is famously so bad at it.

Not only things AidaIro have referenced... but the past story they made, Narisokonai Snow White, I think about that too...

in that story, two twins are born into servitude-- one to be a princess's servant, the other, to be a scholar, and keeper of the kingdom's crazy knowledge of poisons. From a young age, he's doing nothing but reading about the effects of poisons, so you get a very unconventional boy... and eventually, a person all too accustomed to the idea of suffering, death, terrible symptoms, and yet completely and utterly devoid of conventional childhood memories. The princess of the story expresses things such as, that she would be sad, when he goes away (really, he plans to kill himself...).... more than he believes he deserves. The princess's pity and sympathy touches his heart.

Tsukasa was already a strange child, and then, the Red House alters his perception of 'life' and 'value'-- what has 'value'? Whatever people individually feel. People exchange all kinds of things, for all kinds of reasons ... people are willing to lose something to gain something else, people scale the importance of things nonsensically. I think that sort of peek into people's hearts, would break down your idea of what it means to be "special", what life itself is "for". A sort of coin to exchange for something else. Tsukasa saw himself as something like that. I think humans have an inscrutable value system ... so Tsukasa seems to have an ungrounded sense of importance or unimportance to life, a lack of appropriate response to any of it. Is it sad when someone dies? Sometimes, but not always. Sometimes nobody liked you, sometimes you made other's life worse, sometimes you just weren't regarded at all. I'm sure he saw many selfish and crude exchanges in the Red House, and people desperate for something or other. Some lives worth losing your mind over, some lives worth less than nothing.

In light of that, it's obvious why the idea of Amane KILLING HIM, AND THEN THROWING AWAY HIS OWN LIFE is an INTOXICATING concept. ... asking for, what, nothing at all? Why would he do that? That isn't an 'exchange' of anything. Of course he has to observe for himself, why Amane would do that ...

In my mind, it seems like the most likely thing to finally throw him off would be his own value or presence spelled out …

you could threaten Tsukasa, you could hate Tsukasa, you could kill Tsukasa, and he would be fine with that, he would understand why you want to do that, he is very familiar with people hating another, wanting someone gone, wishing life could be easier...

but I don't know if he could understand how beloved he can be to anyone, really …

[ask-emile-sdv]

we should go on a date! i know a great spot: the epic the musical livestream tomorrow night (i wrote this as of 8/28) (im not indoctrinating you into my obsession i swear) (please dont call me a theater gay my partner already does TvT) you can hear calypso go ALL WE COULD WANT HERE ALL WE COULD NEED HERE or telemachus going I KNOW LIFE AND FAITH ARE SCARY BUT I WANNA BE LEGENDARY or even zeus singing. zeus's main song is very zeus btw but god games isnt just zeus's song its a song where he gets his kids and wife to be pit against athena its p cool (APHRODITE YOUR LITTLE HIGH AND MIGHTY ODYSSEUS CLAIMS TO LOVE HIS MOTHER BUT LET HER DIE OF A BROKEN HEART HE WAS BUSY FIGHTING MORE LIKE BUSY SPITING THE CYCLOPS LET HIM FEEL THE PAIN THAT HIS MOTHER FELT AND ROT) augh uh. one sec. lemme actually do smth coherent

EPIC: The Musical is an Odyssey retelling and adaptation made by a young man Jorge "Jay" Rivera-Herrans. It started out during lockdown because he had another musical he was working on but due to COVID restrictions it made him and his then-crew unable to continue working. During COVID, however, he wanted to make another musical. And so, for over four years now, he has been writing, casting, and recording EPIC: The Musical. It is a musical sectioned into sagas, five of which being in the first act and the other four being delegated to the second. There have been six sagas released thus far, with the Wisdom Saga, the seventh saga, being released on Friday, August 30th.

Jay has explicitly stated in his videos about the creative process that he takes heavy inspiration for how he conveys plot points and the like from anime and video games, more heavily the latter as he is attempting with EPIC to create a musical that feels like a video game. The way he does this is by giving each saga a boss battle, each with such powerful music to match. In Poseidon's "Ruthlessness" he preaches to Odysseus the true meaning of this world: ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves, a message that sums up the entire theme of the musical and that is repeated throughout. In Zeus's song titled "Thunderbringer" it repeats his brother's preaching but he didn't explicitly tell him, more showed him by forcing him to choose between making it home to his son and wife--something he said he'd trade the world for in the second song--or saving his crew that had just mutinied moments before. And by the end of the musical, Odysseus has internalized every boss battle and we get to watch him become the final boss from the perspective of those who tried to wrong him and that are getting punished for their actions. By the end of the musical, Odysseus is a heavily changed man and the final song is titled "Would You Fall In Love With Me Again" which is a song to his wife, Penelope. She shows up often in the musical, not often physically, but often pops up because Odysseus proclaims that all he wishes to do is to see his wife and son. Jay assigned each character an instrument, and while I cannot recall each off of the top of my head, Penelope's instrument is a viola. In act two, when we hear the song "Suffering" we can hear something is off because yes this is her voice, but her viola is missing. That minor detail is enough to set off alarm bells in many a fan's head, and it did!

Back to the end of the musical, we get to see a reunion between two lovers, but only after what is a reunion for one and a first meeting for the other--the song between Odysseus and Telemachus, his son. It is one of the most heart-wrenching songs in the musical, just the snippets are enough to move to tears. Odysseus's assigned instrument is a guitar, and for the first time in a while, it is a quiet tune that plays on the guitar used in that song. Just that guitar alone hurts to listen to, at least for me. Anyway, I've waffled on more than enough! Sorry for the ramble, wanted to do something a bit fancier than what i tend to do.

I’m sorry- a date?!

Well- uh- I don’t think we’re THAT close!!!

But… Greek Mythology sounds cool I guess. Even if I’m not really a musical guy. Besides, someone has to look after you, hm?

I GUESS if I have time I might listen…. Only because I don’t have anything to do!

[thueenz]

wait I thought the dodo posted animal welfare/rescue content? What is shady about that corporation/brand? :0

hi i just woke up hopefully i can word my thoughts! so sorry if none of this makes sense ahshshg im not like a professional in these spaces just someone very into animal welfare so bear with me here. this is all from memory as well because i refuse to watch a bunch of dodo videos but i doubt they have changed at all judging by my quick skimming of their account lol

basically it...is and it isnt. Not all the dodos content is bad on technicality. but the people behind it clearly dont actually care about accurate information or animal welfare at all, or at least not in a way that actually helps animals.

concerning point one: improper keeping of wild animals. theres many videos on the dodo of wild animals being kept as household pets, where they most certainly are not thriving lmao. Most of their content is dogs atp at least but theres still a hefty amount of wild animals. foxes, deer, raccoons, opossum, and monkeys i just saw from a quick scroll. not the monkeys good lord the poor things. the dodo promotes and shares this content, these wild animals playing with domestic ones (unsafe), the keeping of monkeys is especially bad they cannot mentally thrive in a home environment and should not be cuddling dogs 😭 all these animals are going to suffer. they are not domesticated, they are not fit to live by humans and get their needs met outside of a zoo where they have an entire enclosure and team of people looking after them. opossums are also if i remember incredibly tricky to keep healthy in captivity and almost always become dangerously overweight in the hands of pet owners, if not always.

ive seen the dodo post 'heartwarming' videos of baby animal rescue by the layperson and how 'cute' it is that the animal got attached and now has to live as a pet. its not cute. its not heartwarming. what you did was fail to rescue the animal. take it to a professional so it can be released properly. if the animal gets habituated to humans, then you failed. it is a failure of a rescue, not cute. organizations try their best to PREVENT that usually.

concerning point 2: promoting dangerous animal pairs. small prey animals and cats are the most common. cat saliva is dangerously toxic to small rodents, lizards, and birds. they should never be put together. every time i see a video of a cat 'playing' with a little hamster or something i die a bit its so stressful. these animals are often stressed by the cats as well. cats have prey drive, instinct. they are going to kill your hamster girl. they just are.

concerning point 3: rampant anthropomorphism. im not sure if people understand what i mean by that so let me try and explain. anthropomorphism is the name for the human tendency to apply human thoughts, emotions, and morals, to inhuman objects and creatures. its what we do. we view things from the only lens we know. however, to do this to animals so freely without a second thought is horrifically damaging. animals are not people. the dodo promotes false images of what animals are feeling and thinking, and applies human concepts of what 'freedom' and 'respect' is to them if that makes sense. its the basic thing all animal rights activists do- which, animal rights activists advocate for animals to have the same rights as humans. the term gets watered down and accepted but most of them genuinely want this, something incredibly damaging for these animals.

anthropomorphism leads to abuse. each animal is different and needs different needs for its own health, not what a human thinks it would want in the animals place. a common point is to say "what if that was you" to a farm animal. its not me. because i am not a cow. a cow has no concept of caring about freedom. it cares that its well fed and healthy. or insisting animals are feeling guilty for something, or insisting they dont have instinct or prey drive and 'would never' because they 'know hes family', or other human views of what animals are feeling instead of understanding what is really going on, which, surprise, damages the animal greatly. they need to be cared for as an animal, not a human.

concerning point 4: a common talking point among animal rights activists, as you can guess, is veganism and completely stopping animal agriculture. this is obviously not good. i wont get into veganism right now unless someone wants me to(but living in a house with a family of animal rights activists vegans, i know first hand unfortunately.) i dont remember what videos exactly but i know the dodo has spread these points in the past, maybe not outright, but with falsified information about farms and livestock. animal farming is not evil. if i have to see one more video of "omg the mother cow is crying for her baby 😭think before you buy meat.." and its a cow crying to be bred bc shes in heat i will explode LMFAO. and then they bring in a calf to reunite with her thats clearly an entirely different breed they just bought for the video to make people sad. not talking about a dodo video there just a general genre of video but i wouldnt be surprised if the dodo posted one of those too 💀.that space is rich with dangerous misinfo about animal welfare and animals themselves, prioritizing human feelings over what the animals actually need. anyway the dodo tends to post content from that point of view

im sure the dodo fakes a lot of the content. in general like. livestock arent just laying near dead on the road from farm trucks after falling out. and other stuff but i dont remember specifics but its a pretty common thing in the animal rights activist scene. believe it or not farmers want their animals alive and healthy for good product if nothing else. mass factory farming and neglect is a product of capitalism not a product of "inherently unethical farming"

if anyone thinks "well, the dodo might not know all this" then they should not be running a widely viral brand about animals. full stop. they dont care. if they did they wouldve long since changed. they care about what makes people feel good, not what is good for the animals. there is no excuse to not know at least this basic information if you are running an account like that. i see a lot of abuse online from people who dont know better because the average person knows next to nothing about animal welfare beyond how to keep a dog alive. and i wish desperately there was more education on this stuff but it is what it is. i will never blame someone for not knowing something as long as they are willing to learn. the disconnect from animals and understanding them in this world is a huge problem, especially the disconnect of where you get your food. but they do not get that excuse.

tl;dr dodo promotes neglectful and dangerous keeping of animals, and false information about them.

[montydrawsstuff]

I'd love to see if you have any ideas on how you think Katana and Slushie would first meet or become friends! We've been throwing out some silly ideas already but any call out to you specifically?

(Could be a multiverse thing, could be just your universe's Slushie counterpart, idk)

im gonna try to stick to my universe, just in case i mess something up with hers hehe

would love to write the oc cuties!

Katana huffed in his last "calming breath" before stepping back out onto the floor. It had been quite the lunch rush and he was pretty keen to spend the next 4 hours either staring at a wall or screaming at it. Still, he had one hour to go. One hour of busting his stripey ass and trying not to lose his cool- He never did at work, but today may have been his day.

"Keep yourself in the zone, son. Let your mind be calm as a river.."

That's what his father told him. Well, his river was just about ready for a tidal wave. His last table had done it. He was about ready to slice their whole party in half, or quit.

But surely, he could get through this last hour..

Thankfully, the place was dead. It wouldn't be long before they'd close till dinner, so it made sense, but it was still unusually quiet. Lucy gestured to a booth near the entrance, where someone light furred and fluffy took up most of one side.

Table for one? Okay loser... Actually I could do with some loser time too...

"Hey there! Welcome to the Golden Tiger! I'll be your server, names Katana- call me Kat."

The girl- some kind of fox he guessed- seemed surprised at his greeting. She jolted slightly, but didn't look up.

"Soooooo...... Can I get ya something orrrr... is that seat just comfy?" he asked, trying to keep himself from drifting.

"Umm.. do you have any recommendations? The Red Braised Pork looks good..." she murmured, with a sniffle.

Katana read all he needed from this girl, she was upset about something, probably had been crying. Just wants something yummy to make her feel better. So... in other words- an easy customer!

Or at least not his last customer!

"I mean... people order it? I can't tell ya personally if it's good since I'd die if I ate it but..." he chuckled.

Tell a little joke, show them the smile- god I'm such a good server!

"Is it... spicy?" she asked nervously, glancing up through her bangs, finally. She shot her eyes back to the menu soon after, though.

"yyyeah....? I mean, it won't kill ya but..."

"That sounds good.."

"Okay cool, and for drinks?-"

"-And some scallop pancakes, and extra rice... and the pork dumplings... and the egg drop soup please.."

Katana kind of just paused for a little before writing all that down. "Oookayyy.. You are... hungry. Um.. Drinks?"

"Just... green tea is fine..." she added, shyly sliding the menu over.

"Sure.. won't be long.." Katana gave another wonky smile before making his exit, just in time to see her steal a look.

Great, I'm the entertainment today I guess...

He took a look back at her, then to her order. Dang was it a lot of food, was this girl some kind of body builder? Where did she put it all? The cost didn't shake him, since their prices were pretty good for the quality, but the AMOUNT.

Girl ordered 3 sides and 2 mains dang it! Even with MAD munchies I couldn't do THAT!

He couldn't even be bothered to hand the order slip to his mother by this point, choosing instead to rip the page out and flick the page in her general direction and shout "Reflex test!" before heading back out.

Still dead. Good.

He leaned on the wall and stared at nothing, his mind still not hazed enough for his liking. Nevermind, soon enough he could just make a nest and just...

Do nothing?

He sighed and took a stroll back to the table.

"Hey."

The girl shot her gaze up, this was probably the last thing she wanted- to be berated by her server, the horror. But... Katana was bored, so she could suffer.

"So.. what are you doin' here all by yourself? New here?"

She blushed. "I have a friend in station square... well, she wasn't home, but she mentioned coming here before I think? She said it was... good"

"I mean, it's okay..." Katana drawled back "Yea, Sonic came here once. really put us on the map- brought all his friends"

The girl looked quite surprised at the name drop "Sonic the hedgehog?"

"Yea.. I think he was a hedgehog.. Looked like one... Apparently he's a big deal" he shrugged casually, fully knowing the huge celebrity status he had.

"Wow." she responded, kind of in awe "My friend... might have been with them..."

Katana hissed playfully through his teeth, giving a cheeky smile "Dang, you got famous friends? And here I was thinking I could impress ya with that one!"

She giggled. Haha! Cheering up already!

"Actually, I've been meaning to visit Mystic Ruin for a while. The temples are really beautiful and.." she blushed in a sort of dreamy way "at night... you can't beat the view... so many stars..."

"Oh.. right on. I guess I'm used to it, hehe... You don't get a sky like that in the big city."

Katana looked around nervously, where was this girl's dang food? Why hadn't anyone told him to buzz off yet? Weren't people generally creeped out by lizards, anyway?

"You know I don't think I heard you right when you introduced yourself, so I was surprised when you weren't a cat!" she giggled. Oh, so that's what that look was about.

"Oh, that's cool. I thought someone left their coat in the booth"

She giggled more. Okay, maybe this was a nervous thing now.

"It just sounded like... you said your name was Katana?"

"My name is Katana" he corrected, as if it weren't a strange thing to be named.

"Oh..."

"Katana! C'mere! Mom's got the food ready!" Lucy called "Get off your smoke cloud and come get it!"

"Geez, Fine! I'm comin', Batty!" he took his time at first, but remembered he liked this girl now so got his ass in gear. Though he was uneasy at how she stared at him again once his back was turned.

"Okay, that everything? Enjoy! And er... Have a good day!"

"Thanks... by the way.. sorry, you noticed me staring, didn't you..."

Do I make it awkward? uhhhhhh YEAH

"Ya, Don't worry, I know I'm a bit of a spectical.." He remembered the note he got instead of a tip from his last table, growling.

"I can't help but.. be fascinated by... scales... sorry!"

Ooooohhhhhh, she likes lizards! Duh!

Maybe she's dating one hehe

"Oh no worries, enjoy ya meal... errr"

"Slushie."

"Seriously?- I mean!- Nice name! Aw man... Well, we're even now! Hey let me know when you want a to-go box, 'Kay?"

Slushie nodded with a silly smile, already dug into her food.

To Katana's utter shock, she didn't need the to-go box

[my-mt-heart]

Long ask sorry.

Im a bit lost honestly. I watched the caryl scenes of 11.21 and im conflicted. I refuse to watch the "donnie" scenes especially since if u look at comments on youtube lots of people are like "oh my God Donnie is happening she made him giggle i wasnt dreaming and he's so worried for her"

And then u have this reviewver saying carol's openly in love with daryl now wich uh, maybe, but, actually, no? This is still too subtle for my sanity

Yes, the fact that she mentions HIM to Maggie while in tears ("i was apart from him when we arrived" not exact quote here...) and not Zeke her supposed ex husband is telling, but from his side, nothing is really telling. And when she talked to him about Connie, i can tell u that in a way it made me worried because GA seems to believe it confirms his feelings for Connie, and the way he acts doesnt help, but at the same time it reminds me of when they were looking for Beth.

He was worried and she was there for him. And he definitely wasnt in love with Beth but he cared for her deeply. The thing is that Connie is not a teen, she's a 40 something (at least the actress is) strong bad ass woman and worrying that this time might be different than with his feelings for Beth doesnt seem ridiculous. But i see the way Carol looks at him (and honestly she has been looking at him that way, i mean not subtle at all, since stradivarius for me, Zeke never really stood a chance in the long run, Henry dead or not) and i know u believe they cant go the "she loves him he doesnt" way, but for the scenes i've seen , he's still too cold with her for me. And she's like a lost puppy who dont know how to make things go back to how they were between them and who's suffering so much with the situation and i cant anymore. I hate it

And Im lost. She definitely believes she doesnt deserve him especially after the cave incident and im sick of it. Lets say he doesnt love her back, at least stop being cold to her.

An another part of me, maybe the desillusional one, is still thinking that the fact that she really seems in love with him now cant be for nothing, with 3 episodes left, and that if he's still so much at odds with her its not for nothing either. Connie is alive, the cave incident is long forgotten and forgiven by everyone else in team family, including Connie and Kelly, the fact that he's still cold is very telling: it was never about just Connie but about trust being broken ("dont bullshit me"). We know that. But she keeps pushing him towards Connie and she takes his hand and looks at him like he's the moon and the stars and he's still kind of strange towards her. Im so lost, honestly. Im not even sure we will have answers before the end, they could still let everything open to keep both shippers for the daryl spin off. But what i want is for him to warm up to her like before. And its patethic that we have, i mean i have, to beg for it. We re talking about Caryl here. His f...ing feud with Rick was awful, but all was forgotten with a simple "i'd die for you". Cant we have something like that at least for the last season with 3 ep left between Caryl? Especially since there is no caryl spin off in sight anymore? Is that too much to ask? For Caryl, really? Its been horrible between them since 10.03 give or take some nice moments... for me anyways. And its been way too long. Im so lost. Im sorry.

Don’t be sorry. Pretty sure the intention is to make us feel anxious right now, which I know is super frustrating when there’s not a lot of runway left. Even though we’ve all had enough of the subtlety, don’t be so quick to dismiss the *many* visual cues because they still matter a lot (like SF mentioned). The physical distance we often see between them suggests there’s an emotional distance too, yes, but you have to imagine it’s something that’s going to be bridged and how do you convey that visually? With a callback to the terminus reunion maybe? That’s what I’m hoping for anyway.

As far as Daryl’s “coldness” goes, POV is also something to take note of. We’re seeing things through Carol’s eyes, which is why the Daryl and Connie beats feel played up. She thinks she broke her friendship with Daryl because she let Connie get hurt and she doesn’t want that to happen again. She doesn’t want to take away Daryl’s happiness. But like you said, the issue goes much deeper than Connie. In season 10, when we saw things through Daryl’s eyes, he was heartbroken because Carol was essentially running away from him. He asked her to follow his light and take his hand, but in a metaphorical way, she didn’t (couldn't). Now we’re seeing her reciprocate hence the light/dark imagery in 20 and the hand holding in 21. I’m glad you brought up Beth. That’s a great parallel too. They want to save somebody they couldn't save before and they're working as a team to do it.

I hope this helps a little bit. Obviously I don't know for sure what's going to happen, but I think there's reason to hope. TWD loves ship baiting, but placating Donnie fans isn’t going to do much for AMC in the end. They’re a significantly smaller sector of the fanbase than Carylers, who they’ve been profiting off of for years  and still can if they give us something that’ll make us happy. 

[belle-keys]

how do you think the Secret Tragic Ending for chot would have went down? bc it's so so interesting to me and i really want to read it one day but i also have 12-year-old Edgier = Better disease so im not sure if there's a way it could've been realistically pulled off without devolving into death for the sake of death

I mean, for me, I generally like tragedy in fiction and find that a certain tragedy often (but not always) makes for a really poignant ending? Idk, take what I say with several grains of salt. I actively search for works that fall under the MCD tag in my different fandoms on AO3... hah. My favorite fanfiction of all time involves a scene with a meat grinder. I like happy endings too, sure, but the Epilogue in Chain of Thorns was far too idyllic for it to be satisfying for me personally. I don't hate it, in fact I loved the general story in ChoT even if I didn't like certain decisions Cassie made with some of the characters, but the Epilogue was way too Cinderella, way too Bridgerton, for me to find that it worked in the overall framework.

I've been of the opinion that TLH was supposed to be super duper dark based on the tone and setup of the pre-ChoG short stories anyway. I mean, at least in reference to James. If I were to extrapolate, I'd say that Cordelia was always going to get a reasonable or optimistic ending. But as I was telling @amchara yesterday, I feel like James was supposed to be a bit of a ragdoll. Not cursed, but "damned" and "destined to walk among thorns and flowers". It always felt like Cassie wanted to or had planned to make him suffer unimaginably without actually having him, Lucie, Will, or Tessa harmed.

I assume what was going to happen was that Kit was going to die the way he did i.e. protecting someone. I feel like Thomas would have died in the big battle. And I feel like Matthew was supposed to be the final punch: maybe he'd die getting his Marks stripped as a "consequence" of the potion business. I believe the element of sacrifice was always going to be a much more important than it was in ChoT, since almost no sacrifices were made for the characters to have their happy endings. I don’t think it would have been death for death’s sake, but it might have verged a wee bit, ever so slightly, into that YA torture porn category. Now, let me reiterate and emphasize, that I do not actively want any of this to have happened (cus I damn well know fingers are gonna start pointing), nor do I think it works in the context of the rest of ChoT. Like, I don’t entirely mourn this ending we didn't get, nor do I want widespread misery everywhere. But I do think that the ending originally being James, old on his death bed, reflecting on all that he lost is kind of… delicious. She didn’t need to kill everyone for us to get something like this, but she still wrote it off entirely and it is what it is. I’m currently writing my James meta piece, so I’ll ramble on a bit more about this stuff there. I mean, a whole ass generation of teenagers became traumatized by the isolation and death that Covid-19 provoked, and I understand why she changed the ending.

[ants-personal]

have another scene were evan is sitting at the beach by the water hugging his legs with his chin resting on his knees. Staring at the water solemnly as tears run down his cheeks as the wind blows gently.

Tim who had panicked before thinking wvan had runoff somewhere finally finds him and approaches quietly standing beside evan for a bit neither wpeaking evan wiping his face and eventually tim would ask if he can sit and when evan would just look away and nid he would slowly lower himself and sit crisscross. Hands resting in his lap worrying his bottom lip. He hasnt been very good at comforting himself let alone others but he doesnt want to just leave evan alone.

Just as tim thinks of something at least slightly comforting evan cuts him off

" I know you think we have to do whatever it is habit asked. But we dont or i mean you dont I can go off myself no one else has to suffer oe die for whatever hes planning. I mean shit if you want to actual help me youd drive me out to the middle of this stupid ass ocean and push me over with rocks on each ankle."

And itd stun tim really and hed just shake his head cause of course not he wouldnt do that to evan or anyone he knows whats its like to kill someone and it nearly destroyed him.

Hed shake his head

" Evan im not going to do that it wouldnt help anyone. If ive learned anything its thay whatever these ... other things are that haunt us is that they wont just let us go no matter what. But i know we don't know eachother that well but i believe me when i say i know what your going through. Maybe not like exactly but this shits been ruining my life even when I cant remember it."

Hed place a hand tentatively on evans shoulder anf just hold it there and right as hes about to pull it away thinking hes gone to far evan leans into it.

" but im not doing this cause habit said i mean not entirely i am so he leaves Jessica out of this mess. But im also doing this as a way to end it ince and for all make that faceless fuck leave me and you and everyone else its tormented alone. We can stop it and then finally move on to idk something better worrying about stupid stuff like taxes instead of other wordly entities."

Evan would sigh with a small while ll3tting go of his legs to just fall back staring up at the sky next to tim

" You know you are fucking annoying when you think your right about something you get a certain look in your eye.

" I hate it."

Tim would chuckle and pat evans arm Evan sighs again turning to look at tim with a slight frown

"This sucks but you both i dont have a choice like always so fine"

" Well you dont have to say it like that but i guess so cmon before you get sick or something and we can start getting ready to for the longest roadtrip of our lives."

Evan moving to sit up exaggerating his moments till hes slumped up tim standing dusting his pants off before extending a hand to evan who glances at it then tim before just rolling his eyes and taking it both groaning as tim pulls evan up which the other purposly makes harder then it needs to be. Tim just shakes his head with a small smile acting annoyed as he turns them both to walk back to his house. He hasnt had to deal with someone elses antics in so long. Its kinda nice.

"Since you are driving me to hell which is your and his idea remind you. Im making you have to buy me whatever snacks and fuck all I want."

That makes tim laugh.

[saetoshis]

waiting to hear your thoughts 👉👈

WHAT RHTE FUCK WAS THIS CHAPTER IM SO OCNFUSED AJFADH anyways jjk ch 200 spoilers under the cut !

so starting with the whole itadori / sukuna thing:

the way they're leading this up with megumi saying the angel's help is 'indispensable' and yuuji saying he'll gladly lay down his life - it could be foreshadowing to his death but also.. MAYBE IM IN DENIAL BUT i think itadori won't die in order for gojo to be saved, idk i just think this is supposed to be a little bit of a 'fake out' with what's happening this ch.

but the line "the angel must have some ability that can permanently annihilate sukuna without any room for resurrection" is really interesting, so maybe kurusu has a way to FINALLY kill sukuna after all? but does itadori HAVE to die in order for sukuna to be killed? maybe there's a way around it, idk !! AAAAH

and also, i bet sukuna is really really set on living (at least to see megumi's potential) so i doubt he'll go down easily ?? even with the angel's potential "permanent way to annihilate sukuna"

ASDHAKJSDN AND???? SUKUNA SAYING "are you still underestimating me? i've already died once" MAKES ME THINK THAT HES DEFINITELY CAPABLE OF STAYING ALIVE.. at least by the angel.. maybe itadori WILL have to die in order for sukuna to die too. im thinking they probably end up collecting all the fingers before sukuna dies tbh

NOW TO THE KENJAKU STUFF?!@#*#$??

WTF LMFAISD IDK WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENIGNJDNA

idk what the fuck kenjaku's intention is, other than probably creating a world where cursed energy should be cultivated, and that people without cursed energy suffer and/or die

the US DEPARTMENT OF ENERGY?>

i guess kenjaku is trying to literally get the whole world into using cursed energy so that normal people who don't have cursed energy will die ????

THE FOOTAGE FROM MECHAMARU??

i guess that's kenjaku showing the US dept. of energy something like "hey look how cool these people are!" to just... show off how cursed energy can work?? IDK LKAMFO

AND NAIHFAOD if they end up using gojo as an energy source GOODBYE WHAT?? LKFAD like that'll make finding gojo so much harder, let alone just freeing him from prison gate

are they deadass about to capture the sorcerers and use them as power sources WTF LAKSNFA??? LAST THING I EXPECTED LKANSDFAFBAJ

so since this took place in february, and the current plot is in november, that means that the 807 random ass players who entered the culling game MUST BE people the dept. of energy/kenjaku sent in to capture the sorcerers. but like??? do those new players have cursed energy or not?? cause if they do... that'll just be super hard for the sorcerers LKAMDN

but on the flip side, if those new players dont have cursed energy and are trying to capture sorcerers, that means that itadori and everyone else have to kill regular people.. i bet yuuji would rather have himself captured than be forced to kill regular people :/

but the way the head dept. of energy guy reacted to kenjaku's idea... he didn't seem agreeable about it... SO HOPEFULLY THIS SHIT NEVER HAPPENS BUT... THERE ARE STILL 800 NEW PPL WHO JUST CAME IN THE GAME SO I BET THAT GUY AGREED TO KENJAKU'S PLAN WTFFFALSDJHJAD

bruh if any one of the main chars die again im QUITTING FOREVER

[sunflower-selkie]

hey this is pretty personal and heavy account of recent mental health and some poor patterns of behavior.

trigger warning: disordered eating, depression, unhealthy coping, discussion of past child abuse (no retelling of specific events)

I'm past the height of the crisis and have finally started reaching out again. im not wanting to hurt myself and noone is hurting me to be clear

if you are a caregiver in your private life I highly recommend you take an honest look at your quality of life and how much you are really asking of yourself. you deserve life as much as your loved ones do. Learn about compassion fatigue and find ways to keep charging yourself up or you'll run out of help to give sooner than anyone expects and hurt yourself and everyone else in the process.

going through an emotional breakdown over this past week. i think I've started turning the corner, letting myself feel some things I could not admit to myself and starting to finally accept that believing it's my responsibility to prevent my responsibility to protect even my loved ones n matter what is just too much for a human. i can't push past my limit every chance I get at the drop of a hat because I have to live with those consequences. i have to accept I'm disabled and that means i have to establish firm boundarie to allow myself some time when I'm not waiting for the next crisis whether I like it or not or everything about my life will literally fall to pieces till i can't eat or speak or think without feeling like I'm going to make everyone shatter to pieces if i accidentally make a request and i just can't live like that.

Part of what is going wrong is food restriction, and i cannot stress strongly enough that having gone through this I don't think serious diets, even for medical reasons, are something one should attempt if you're not in a good mental health space, especially without any form of professional support. every choice you make feels like it's being judged and punished by your own body.... yes the physical pain and suffering is slightly less if you do everything right in my case, at least some days, but it's not worth agonizing over risking a tiny piece of food i haven't prepared myself from ingredients i havent checked and then feeling like i just punched a baby or something for eating a thin slice or two of avocado on accident.

But this is the biggie: i need to really believe that I'm worth loving and not just because of how useful I've made myself to those i love. it only makes my relationships worse and ends up leaving me with noone except those who most desperately need me that i feel like I can keep up communication with, because if i just cut out enjoying or taking care of myself as one of my real goals and turning it into something I do just to recover for my next foray against the horrors of the world for those who keep reaching out and asking…. it felt like that way i can meet someone's needs and meeting others needs is the only way I have to feel like I deserve to keep living and I'm trying really hard to break free of that.

caregiving is serious business and you need strategies and support networks to make sure you can keep giving healthily, recharging rather than putting yourself on a death marchvin the name of love. the people i care for really love me too, even when I'm letting a need go unmet in a moment because i just can't always be available. it hurts. it sucks. it makes me hate myself.... but if I just get it right this time, of i just don't give up and give everything they ask maybe when I die I'll deserve their love. that's what I'd basically been telling myself - that i was slowly dying for love.... and it kept me going to think that, because at least now I'm really living up to what I believe in. at least now people will forgive me for being less than psychic,less than a trained mental health professional, less capable as a housewife than any of the women who raised me.... not that I ever took the time to really learn from them. but I need to forgive myself for not being the daughter i feel i should have been to my mother with the situation she was in too. kids can't protect their parents and I never even realized that wasn't just normal and women weren't superhuman on some level because my dad sure never treated my mom like her feelings might have been more important than his convenience and I guess I just really learned that lesson all too well, and here we are with me living the consequences and hurting all my friendships and romances and my own body because of my fucking "daddy issues" and trying to br the only kind of daughter i could all those years ago if i wasn't going to be beat like he constantly threatened or like he did when my brother refused to back down and refused to pretend to be perfect for them.... not gonna lie I'm glad he's dead now, but I would have much rather he healed and unlearned some of the horrible lessons he himself was taught by life about what being a man or a woman means and what the consequences are if you don't comply.

in short I'm ready to forgive mysel and apologize to myself in his place now, i just need to figure out exactly what changed behavior that apology needs to entail, and do the work on my mental health he sadly never started until way too far down the road. And I'm ready to forgive men. they're just as much victims in all this even of they are the assigned enforcers of these horrible roles we're told to play to make sure real solidarity never happens. if we could just accept we're all equals even starting at home and in ourselves it'd be way too obvious how badly we're all being exploited by those who just happen to be on top of the current hierarchy insisting that it is only natural that some of us are less people than others and that it's okay actually that the people freezing on the streets will die, otherwise the rich might have to share.

i play at some of these very things in my kink amongst others in an attempt to process them and to give myself permission to say no, but I guess that might have been why I felt i had to give up that role - i couldn't let it just be a game anymore if my whole self worth really revolved around being Good.