#it’s just a dumb show with a stupid plot but it’s meant to be funny and all the songs being queen is gonna carry it

[milo-is-rambling]

The countdown until the first script reading is all I’m seeing in my mind. In four hours and fifteen minutes I’ll be sitting in audience seats of the little black box theater while everyone reads the script for the first time and I get to imagine what it’ll all look like in March when the show is on the big stage

[beevean]

I hate the defense of dramatic irony for Lanolin's actions, to be honest. Especially because it's not even good dramatic irony: it just stems from characters being idiots and shit friends to each other (see: the entire bit of Silver and the DC in issue 63 and 64.) Sure, Lanolin can't know Duo is Mimic! But 1. We as audience sure do because we are constantly beaten over the head with it, making her be a bitch all the time extremely frustrating because we KNOW she is wrong, and 2. She SHOULD, because the only reason she hasn't noticed yet is because the plot demands the DC to be betrayed again no matter how OOC everyone must become to make that so.

Also, Whisper saw Duo kick Silver and he clearly told her Duo's face changed (of course not to Tangle and Lanolin too though), so why is she hanging out with him now?? Even if Duo's lifethreatening four feet fall didn't show he was Mimic, does she doubt herself so much that she thought she imagined the kick too or something?? Girl just pull off his glove and check his hands, you know the puckers on there are Mimic's clear tell. Or even his brown eyes, Duo's color, or the fact he looks 80% like your dead friend.

As I said in the past, Lanolin was a terrible choice for this sort of plot. You know those cartoon episodes where the antagonist pulled pranks, and then the protagonists got blamed in their place, and it's all haha funny hijinks? This is the same thing, which is already not a very engaging plot, because the characters we care about are getting punished for no fault of their own. To make things worse, we don't know Lanolin! She has just appeared in her new #girlboss version, and right off the bat, she's antagonizing characters we have spent years knowing and getting attached to, both the comic OCs and canon characters.

Why would I want to side with her, or see her POV? She is wrong, she is not entertainingly wrong, and her behavior is not only nasty, but even unfair in-universe: she has brushed off both Silver and Whisper without giving them a single chance of explaining themselves, especially bad in the former's case because it was a case of "he says, he says", but she immediately jumps to berate Silver and treat him like an idiot instead of doing the leader thing and try to listen to both sides. And as for Whisper, yes she was stupid to not bring proof with her, but the moment the name Mimic slipped out of her mouth, Lanolin should have at least questioned her more and tried to understand why she was suspecting Duo, instead of immediately being like "WHY ARE YOU HARASSING MY POOR LIL KITTEN 🥺". fuck that "she cares about everyone and it shows", she's only biased towards Duo, which would be unfair even if he wasn't the villain in disguise.

Forget Duo, I don't even know how Whisper can hang around Lanolin by #67 without secretly seething for this whole accident. I really, really don't like how she orders Whisper to "control herself" after she says that she suspects Duo is actually the guy who traumatized her, especially after she learns that she was betrayed and has good reasons to not trust easily. Where's all that compassion now? Brings all sorts of unfortunate implications about how Lanolin sees Whisper. (also "Silver is one thing" sounds really demeaning too)

Yes, it makes sense for the kind of character she is meant to be, the no-nonsense rule stickler. I'm allowed to think she's an ass and to say I find her thoroughly unenjoyable.

But yeah, Whisper simply letting all go makes her look very weak and insecure. "welp, guess Lanolin was right, and I was dumb! Oh well, my trauma makes me unstable! No hard feelings bestie!" yeah no it's not how it works. It doesn't help that in her next appearance, Sonic also walks all over her resentment towards Surge and guilt trips her into accepting the girl who beat her up and stole her Wisp friends - this poor woman cannot catch a break, everyone treats her like shit.

[fireheartwraith]

Someone accused me of being a hater and that pissed me off so here are all of my thoughts on the Netflix Avatar The Last Airbender live action series. What I liked, didn't like, what I'm worried about or hoping going foward, etc, in no particular order because I was just hate typing. I tried to separate my rambling into topics, but I did that after I had already typed everything. Enjoy

Zuko and Zhao:

I liked most of the fire nation characters. Zhao took some getting used to, but it was a fun new take on the character. I loved Zuko's crew and Azula's scenes. I really hate what they did with the agni kai and Zhao's death though, it really feels like they missed what those scene's meant for Zuko's character. Everyone already said all there is to say about why having Zuko fight back is a stupid idea so I won't comment on it, but having Iroh kill Zhao also pissed me off. He's supposed to die because of his own arrogance and greed and Zuko is supposed to try and help him because he's the type of person who would offer a helping hand to an enemy, despite his father's attempts at beating the kindness out of him.

Ozai:

I like what they are doing to Ozai, it could be interesting and add depth to the character, I just think it would be less ooc it those moments of doubt and "weakness" were in private? Like, in public, he is always this perfect façade but in private, the mask starts to slip away. But I think they’re going for that, so that's okay. It also adds dimension to his relationship with Azula since she also dons a mask of perfection, and this shows that she learned that with him.

Azula:

Speaking of Azula, I'm a bit worried because since we already sympathize with her, she could not be as menacing and intimidating a villain, but I hope it will work out.

Iroh:

I'm really 50/50 on Iroh. I like his interactions with Zuko, but why was he out there spewing fire nation propaganda and justifying his war crimes. My dude, what the hell.

Katara:

I really hate what they did to Katara and Suki. Let me punch someone. I won’t say much because everyone else has already exhausted this point, but yeah. Katara is so much more than a bender and a little sister. Her mother's death didn't just affect her bending, it changed everything in her life. She had to become her mother and take care of her brother when she was so young, she’s kind, caring, and a little overbearing at times. But she’s also prideful, jealous, stubborn, and has a bit a temper. She's not a perfect girl who smiles softly at the world around her. She's angry at what happened to her, she’s resourceful, she's funny, she's dedicated. This show's Katara is a bender, and that's it. And she's a prodigy at it, became a master all by herself because she don't need no man, no sir. Because #feminism is when your female protagonist is relegated to side character with no flaws apparently.

Suki:

And Suki, oh Suki... what did they do to you? Ah yes, cartoon Sokka is sexist, so instead of having him go through character growth spurred on by getting his ass beat by a girl, we'll just make that girl instantly fall in love with him and have an ungodly amount of sexual tension just so she and the audience can ogle at this shirtless man for a good thirty seconds. Yes, that's much better and not sexist at all!!

Sokka:

I like how they are focusing on Sokka's intelligence and other ways to be a hero since I've always loved that detail of his character (i seriously love when in modern aus he's studying engineering, bonus if he has a minor in arts and literature), but considering he *does* become a skilled warrior I fear this plot thread may not payoff. Like "you don't need to be a warrior to be a hero!! But here's some swordbending lessons just in case" is weird. Similar to that is what happened in the cave of two lovers: changing the answer to the riddle was stupid. It makes no sense in the lore AND makes Sokka look dumb. Couldn't he at least be the one to figure it out? The sibling moment was cute though.

Katara and Aang:

What bothers me most (after what they did to my poor girls) is that the gaang don't feel like friends, much less a found family. Katara isn't Aang's earthly attachment. If they wanted to start the romance when they look closer in age that's fine, but they could still be friends? I mean, they tell us they're friends and very important to each other, but are they? They went on a trip together and talked a couple of times. Katara should have broken him out of the iceberg on purpose because it not only shows how she disregards her own safety to help those in need, it is the inciting incident of the show and should be more than an accident. Again, she’s supposed to be a protagonist, the story is supposed to be told through HER. She's the one who should do the intro!! Not Kyoshi, Gyatso and Gran Gran.

She should teach Aang waterbending. This is Book 1: Water, why isn't that boy waterbending. That would further both the plot and their relationship. Which is supposed to be a cornerstone of the show, mind you. And I'm not saying "relationship" as in a romantic one. They should be friends, confide in one another, Katara should calm him down when he enters the Avatar state because this shows how important they are to one another. Gyatso's memory being what calms him down is cute, but if it impacts what is, again, a main plot point of the show (Katara is Aang's earthlyattachment), they shouldn’t do it. Also, Aang should have tried to firebend and accidently burned Katara. This way, Katara learns she can heal (which again is super important. Anyone remember the season 2 finale?) it also causes Aang to block out his firebending out of fear of hurting others again. WHICH IS ALSO A MAJOR PLOT POINT. Give me back Kataang, the show literally isn't the same without them.

Also, much time did the three of them spend together as a crew? Not that much, I feel like. Where's my found family?

Jet:

There are some things that I deeply miss, like Sokka's argument with Jet about the old man. The cartoon is very anti violence, it is definitely its thesis. We can discuss wether they are right or not forever, but the show is arguing that even though the fire nation citizens in the earth kingdom are living in a settler colony that serves the imperialist agenda, they are still citizens and killing them is wrong. This confrontation is so important for both Sokka and Jet's characters, and turning Jet into a terrorist feels like a betrayal of his character. And no, armed resistance like what the freedom fighters do isn't terrorism, regardless of whether or not it's morally right.

Missed theme:

The other thing I miss is Teo, his dad, and the other refugees being in an air temple. It adds a lovely grey area to the whole thing. Aang is pissed off that a sacred ancestral home of his people has been invaded and partially destroyed by machines (which also serves as commentary on industrialization and how historical sites are torn down to build skyscrapers and factories irl. We come back to the industrialization theme that the fire nation brings to the table multiple times, but a really obvious exemple is the painted lady episode in the third season), but also the people doing it are refugees running from an imperialist and genocidal army.

I think they saw the obvious parallels between the cartoon themes and real-world shit happening right now and decided to sanitize it lest they piss someone off with politics. Which ended up pissing me off.

The bending:

The visual effects where fine. Sometimes the humans ragdoll a bit too much, but that always happens. The bending looks good, but the firebenders attacking the monks in the beginning look just as powerful as eveyone else when they should be op because of the comet. The comet doesn't look thag much of a threat right now. Also in the cartoon is implied that Gyatso suffocated like twenty firebenders and himself as his final act, which is much more badass than what we got.

The creatures:

The creature design is very good, specially the ones supposed to look scary, because even the ones supposed to look cute look kind of scary here. Can you imagine anh child buying a live action Appa plushie? Because I can't. I also wish we got to see more of Appa and Aang's relationship. I understand it's probably expensive as fuck to animate, but we need them to be buddies. Remember, we have the lost Appa acr next season.

Script:

The acting is... fine. I just laughed when Aang turned to the camera and started to monologue about his personality, but that’s more on the script than on the actor. Speaking of which: oh god, please stop explaining every lore detail three times in expository dialogue. Sometimes, it's okay to tell not show (pacing, establishing worldbuilding, etc. It's why the cartoon intro exists!) but must you do it every time? And then repeat it??

Costume:

The score is obviously great, and the set design is good. Costume, makeup, and hair sometimes are iffy, but that’s because some things will never look good in live action. Yue will always look more like cosplay instead of a real person, I guess (I still think they could have just tried a very light blond wig or gotten an albino actress or something, but whatever). Wish Zuko's scar was looked more like a burn scar and less like a black eye. The clothes looked good, just a bit too "new" looking. Show me some dirt! They always look more conving when they get dirty and bloody.

They have points to improve upon, but overall, it's fun enough to watch on a weekend. But alas, the original is always better (not perfect, just better)

[soursfilms]

@ portwells, if you for a second even think that mack and gina could be serious you’re just plain dumb, i’m sorry. this is the only way i can articulate it at this point. this is the last season. i’m gonna need you to be so serious right now and use the brain that the lord gave you for once. both mack and dani are clear plot devices to add drama for rina, that’s it. they’re guest stars! and if you actually read interviews and articles, and reviews from screeners who watched the episodes early, you’d know that plot ends mid season. (woops spoiler but idgaf!) most of the stills of them are from the literal hsm4 movie they’re filming and he’s her childhood crush. i can promise you, gina, nor no one in real life is gonna end up with their childhood crush. (sorry to crush your dreams, but you will in fact not marry any one direction member that you had hanging up on a poster on your wall, and funny enough, gina has literal ¡placemats! with mack’s face on it if you look at the dinner table still because gina and her mom were fans of his show. a show in which ricky took the theme song of to write a song for gina and was released as a sneak peak already. extremely unserious all around)

portwells want to cling unto them because they’re bitter, as if we can’t see right through you. i wonder if y’all have ever watched an actual teen drama show in your life. clearly y’all haven’t and apparently haven’t seen interviews with the actual creator of the show speaking about the plot lines about HIS story, because if you did you would not be hitting post on your absurd takes. (not to mention, gina and ricky are clearly in love with each other. that’s something you all need to make peace with. especially if you claim to like gina, just accept it and be happy for her that she’s happy even if you don’t necessarily are a fan. he’s the guy she wants and you cannot change that.)

also, saw someone say ej and ricky being older means they’re both in different life stages than her so they wouldn’t work out?? (first, you don’t even know how old mack is. so i know you feel very stupid right now) and that’s not the same and you know it. gina still had TWO years to go in high school compared to ej, and she tried to make a future with him (those are her words) but it didn’t work out because it was not meant to be. mentally they were in different places. ricky and gina are only a year apart and closer in mindsets, and there’s actual love between them, that they will fight for (in the words of can i have this dance which they sang as a #real ship does “what we have is worth fighting for”) you cannot compare the writing of rina to portwell. one is clearly developed and well written and favored by the writer of the show, while the other was a plot device….let’s stop being bitter and just be at peace with the story the creator wanted to create. if you don’t like it just do not watch.

[adamwatchesmovies]

Tomcats (2001)

Tomcats is a sex comedy so aggressively misogynist, so unfunny, and so inept it will make you want to chemically castrate yourself with molten lava. It’s an extreme statement but your hatred towards this film will be extreme. Anything you can do to dissociate yourself from this wretched excuse for entertainment isn’t enough.

As another member of the gang gets married, the remaining bachelors make a pact to stay single forever. To make their pledge more interesting, everyone in attendance agrees to throw money in a fund every year, with the last “tomcat” taking the whole thing. Years later, when Michael (Jerry O’Connell) becomes indepted to pit boss Carlos (Bill Maher, who adds another reason to hate him by appearing in this film), he desperately needs cash. He makes it his mission to get Kyle (Jake Busey) to fall in love with the one woman he came closest to caring for, Natalie (Shannon Elizabeth).

At least writer/director Gregory Poirier lays his cards on the table right away. This is American Pie if ALL of the characters were Stiffler after spending a decade inside the world of Porky’s and then 10 times less funny. To the men in this film, women are not potential partners or lovers and friendship is out of the question. If you have a pair of breasts and you’re attractive, you’re another target. If you’re old or overweight, you’re garbage. Nothing could be worse than telling a woman “I love you” or spending the rest of your life in a monogamous relationship.

Assuming you can get past the rampant hatred for women that stinks up the entire running time, you’re in for a ridiculous and convoluted premise. In a bid to impress a woman who “only pays attention to high rollers”, Michael blows over $50,000 dollars on the casino floor in one night. I say if he’s that stupid, let him get dumped in the ocean with cement shoes. He’s too dumb to live. Instead, he’s given one chance to save his life by setting up his “friend” in a fake marriage to a woman who hates him. Granted, said friend took Natalie's virginity and threw her away like a proposition to allow women the right to vote, so you don't feel bad for him. Turns out Natalie is a vengeful undercover police officer and she’s more than willing to use the precinct’s ressources to spy on a civilian. Plus, she'll get paid, so that's great but uh oh! The more time she and Michael spend together, the more they realize they have things in common… What could happen next?

The plot is as predictable as it gets and since there is no character development or relationships to be fleshed out, the running time is padded with gags so lame they’ll make you beg for death. When Natalie hints to Michael that she may be falling for Kyle, he becomes furious. In retaliation, he decides he’ll sleep with the next woman he sees (it’s that easy, don’t you know?). First one’s a fatty so he meant the first HOT woman he sees. It’s a demure librarian. I’ll give you three guesses what happens when she brings him home. It’s awful, but not as awful as the gag in which Michael has to chase down a runaway testicle in the hospital (really) or the running joke in which Michael and Kyle’s mutual friend, Steve (Horatio Sanz) thinks his beautiful wife, Tricia (Jaime Pressly) is cheating on him with another woman. She is and he would be mad about it but when he gets invited to join the in the bedroom, all of his anger and anxieties go away.

The performances from the leads aren’t the worst you’ve seen. Or maybe they just seem decent compared to Jaime Pressly, who is so awful you swear they sculpted her out of pine and dragged her on set. Your jaw drops but you pick it up quickly out of fear that some bodily fluid will fly out of the screen and into your mouth. This is the one area where the film kind of shows restraint. Aside from a fake-look lactating breast shown during a horrifying fantasy sequence, there isn’t any nudity in this movie… until the end credits when we see a bunch of outtakes, none of which are any funnier than the actual movie.

If all of these flaws weren’t enough, the direction is aw-ful. Gregory Poirier transitions from scene to scene like an amateur. You know those transitions you find in Microsoft Powerpoint? The one where the screen spins on itself, the checkerboard cross, the zig-zag cross, and the circle wipe? all are used without a dash of irony. The budding “romance” between Natalie and Michael isn’t the least bit convincing because a) the actors have no chemistry whatsoever and b) their dialogue is never romantic or realistic. Constantly, your eyes will dart towards the clock on your player. Has it really only been an hour? We’ve got how many more minutes to go?

I haven’t hated a movie as much as I hated Tomcats in a while. It’s hard to imagine ANYONE watching the film and having a good time unless they were one of those “bros before hoes” idiots… and even then, they wouldn’t be able to relate to this film’s ending so that’s a no-go for those chowderheads either. I can’t wait to forget I ever saw this abomination. (On VHS, May 9, 2021)

[tazzertopia]

my thoughts on the hxh phantom rouge movie

pls do not take this too seriously i just wanna talk about things i noticed when watching it while sleep deprived last night 😊👍😊👍

🚨YAPPER ALERT🚨

-ik kurapika defo would’ve mentioned him at some point to gon and killua but how the fuck did they recognise (puppet) uvogin… like no hesitation….. did kurapika show them a picture or what

-why was kurapika so badly dumbed down and ooc in the movie it actually pissed me off (not really) like one of the main plot points is that the puppet guy (insufferable prick who I’ll get to later) used dead pairo to steal kurapika’s eyes but the issue is that he used pairo’s child self to lure him in like…. 🤨 based on the flashbacks i’m assuming kurapika was around 11-12 when the kurta clan massacre happened and pairo was probably either the same age or a year or two younger (i am not looking this up due to i can’t be bothered) so how the fuck did kurapika not question why his supposedly alive friend hadn’t aged a day in about five years

-especially as kurapika is mostly pretty level headed and logical so how would he not figure that out

-the timeline was confusing as hell to me bc based on uvo and pakunoda being dead in the movie and killua still having illumi’s manipulation needle i’d assume it’s anywhere between the end of the york new arc to the end of the greed island arc but thanks to the power scaling it’s really hard to tell ????????? like somehow gon and killua were basically unscathed after getting directly hit by uvo (the physically strongest member of the troupe) but basically just attacked by combining their nen and overall didn’t seem that strong like how strong are they meant to be by this point

-the townspeople in this movie are coming out on top in the idgaf war because the way none of them reacted to uvo demolishing a hospital… like no commotion. NADA. they just minded their business the entire movie (inspirational tbh)

-but also why was the hospital so desolate and why was kurapika the only one there

-the way only gon, killua and the blonde girl reacted to uvo fucking up the hospital while kurapika remained unbothered

-finally gonna talk about that ugly mf omokage

-he looks like a toxic love interest from an early 2000s dark fantasy harem anime

-like why was he in a completely different art style

-his ability soul doll or whatever it’s called is stupid op bc you’re telling me he can just create puppets of anyone he wants with their exact strength just like that ???????

-also what is the criteria for creating the puppets bc i swear they never explain how he’s able to create them

-like does he need their hair or what

-still confused on how kurapika used chain jail on him considering he isn’t a spider anymore (no clue how the limitations to his power were so flexible) #plotconvenience

-illumi looked uglier than usual in this movie especially at the beginning when he killed those kids

-hisoka’s hair being more orange than red also pissed me off

-we got one shalnark line in the movie tho 😍😍😍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍👍 crumbs

-speaking of crumbs for a movie about the phantom troupe they had barely any screen time

-like barely even five minutes 💔

-lastly just wanna say how fuxking ugly the blonde girl’s puppet was i hate it so much

-lastly lastly ik i posted this already but the cgi fish made me giggle bc they look so out of place (ik i couldn’t do any better i just found them funny tee hee)

that’s it hope you enjoyed reading my complaints about a cash-grab anime movie 💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕😜😜😜😜 can’t wait to watch the last mission tonight so i can complain about it tomorrow 💙 that’s what you get when you’re desperate for hxh content lols but like i said pls don’t take this too seriously okay mwah xoxoxo

[moonlight-melts]

Still burning

Hi I have prism brainrot :)

I don't have a lot to say here. Timeline-wise, it's late enough in the story for Charlie to refer to Goro by his first name.

I reference a book throughout my narration. That book is a plot device I made up and does not exist. Sorry, I know these are killer one-liners, but sadly I made them up 😔 /j

Charlie mentions "[...] everything I've done [...]" Don't look for what he's talking about, I never explicitly mentioned it before. But to give you a vague idea, he works part-time for a newspaper that used to have... Peculiar means of obtaining information.

Warnings: this contains depiction of a suicide attempt (in the past), violence, abuse and anxiety. There's also an extremely vague depiction of dissociation and self-harm urges. This is again dialogue-heavy because these two TALK SO MUCH they'd belong in a theatre play.

Please REBLOG my writing! Thank you!

¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸♪·¯·♫¸¸¸♬·¯·♩¸¸♪·¯·♫¸¸

A book I like has a line that goes "And when I look in the mirror, I see everything and nothing all at once, because my rage blinds me as much as it brings me clarity."

For a while, I wasn't sure what the author meant by that. But now, as I stare at my own reflection, it makes sense. I'm this close to punch the glass, making a wreck out of my hand, because it shows me things I don't want to see. The scar at the corner of my lips. The incensed glint in my eyes. Even as I look down, my hands give it all away. They shake, clenched on the edges of the sink.

Goro's words are going round in my head. I know he's right.

"One wrong call, and we're all dead."

It's true.

One misstep and we're all dead. I know it. I know it, and yet my hands still shake because holy fuck, why.

Then I remember why.

I remember the tears in Yūki's eyes. Shiho's face as she leaped off the roof. Naoya's request on the Phan-site. Goro's grudge against the world.

I remember how the entire world fucks people like us over.

I remember the bruises, the whimpers, the sobs and the screams.

I remember how hard we believe we can't be saved, or save ourselves.

I remember the nights alone trying to fight off the nagging urges.

I remember the scars we all bear, physical or not.

I remember our despair.

That's why.

That same book, later, says "In my violence, I find peace. In the end I'm one with the storm." and it brings back to my mind a reflection I had a little while ago on the paths we all took. Because our only common point, really, is our anger.

Yūki, Shiho and Naoya are all conflict-avoidant to a fault. Their anger is subdued, dismissed, and expressing it is a hard, painful task.

Goro is bitter. He's seen the worst and he isn't sure why he's even fighting anymore. His anger boils, unrelenting, yet exhausted.

As for me...

That's when I realise I stared crying. I'm not sobbing, but the tears roll down my cheeks by themselves, ignoring my frustrated attempts at wiping them.

As selfish as it sounds, the world around me disappears, leaving only me and me and me and me and...

A hand on my shoulder.

It jerks me back to reality so suddenly that my knees almost give out.

-I really don't understand you sometimes, seriously. I get not wanting to be a burden or whatever it is you have in mind, but this is just dumb.

-Do you really need to be an asshole about it?

-I don't see what you're talking about. I'm stating facts. What you're doing is stupid. What were you even thinking about?

-I was thinking about... I gesture vaguely. Everything. "One wrong call and we're all dead." And I know what -or who, really- I'm fighting for, and I don't wanna let anyone down because that happened to all of us so much already that...

I don't know how to finish that sentence. Goro sighs (because of course he does) and hands me a tissue.

-I wonder how you do that, sometimes.

He admits after a bit.

-How I do what?

-There's so much... Tenderness in your resentment.

He spits the word out like it's in a foreign language, and I really can't help but snicker.

-What's even funny about this?

-Nothing! The way you say it is just...!

I'm laughing for real now, and it definitely chases away what was left of my angry tears.

-Will you stop?!

Goro is starting to sound annoyed, but I can hear a hint of a smile in his voice. As I calm down, I ask:

-What do you mean by "tenderness"?

-You're driven by your need to... Protect others. You want to make them feel safe. I find it odd.

-Well, it might be to you, because your motives are essentially your own revenge and, more generally, your own self -not that it's necessarily a bad thing. You've been wronged-

-That's putting it lightly.

-Mh, but all that to say that you're just frustrated and tired out of your mind. I have another mentality, is all. I don't want what happened to me or to any of you to happen to anyone else if I can help it.

He clicks his tongue.

-See? There it is again.

-Kindness, gentleness... They're choices I made. It doesn't erase everything I've done before, but...

-But?

-It proves that people can change. I chose not to be bitter, but it's fine if you take another path.

Change is scary. It's hard. I know that much.

-Is it?

A sour chuckle escapes his lips and his voice sounds uncharacteristically small.

-Yeah! We're humans. We react differently to stuff. That's pretty cool, really. Being a human is neat.

He shakes his head, but he's smiling.

-Really, I don't understand you.

-That's why you love me.

-Huh? Are you sure about that?

-Aw, come on!

As we laugh (together), I face myself in the mirror one more time and I remember another quote from that book. "Love is not a remedy to everything. It doesn't fix anything. But sometimes, it makes things okay. That's enough."

Indeed, I think as I look at Goro's smile and remember Yūki's, Shiho's and Naoya's.

That's enough.

[explodingsilver]

2022 book recap

(Based solely on books I’ve actually finished, not ones that are in progress)

Favorites (in the order that I finished them):

Tehanu by Ursula K. Le Guin

Now this is how you have a series mature alongside its reader, and not just in the sense that Earthsea actually acknowledges that interesting things happen to adults as well. It’s probably the most grounded book in the series, showing what life is like for normal people in a fantasy world, while still managing to have an actual plot and conflict, plus themes that aren’t dumbed down. You know Le Guin’s quote about disliking the cult of women’s knowledge? This book is kind of like a novel-length exploration of that concept. (She even says in the afterword, written years later, that she finds it funny how people always quote one particular character talking about how women are more in tune with mysticism and never include the protagonist’s reply that she used to be surrounded by that mysticism and it’s actually a terrible way to live.)

Raptor Red by Robert T. Bakker

This was written by an actual paleontologist and was originally meant to be a sort of educational novel, but isn’t really useful for that anymore, as a lot of the information is now outdated. You should read it anyway, because it made me cry over a dinosaur. Despite this book containing no dialogue because it takes place in the Cretaceous, the characters all have unique personalities and even the ones that show up for only one chapter are incredibly lovable.

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

Much like Foucault’s Pendulum, I read this to acquire a bit of culture and was surprised by how funny it is. Austen understood obnoxious personalities in a way that few other people do. As for the actual romance, given how uncomfortable I am when people try to play matchmaker with me, I loved the fact that absolutely no one was rooting for the main couple to get together.

This is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone

I read this one in one sitting, and the moment I finished I felt the need to immediately reread it. The writing style is more poetic than a lot of actual poetry, and the plot comes together beautifully. It’s also one of those books where the world actually feels much bigger than what is shown on page.

Off to Be the Wizard by Scott Meyer

This one ended up on the list by the sheer force of how fun it is. I mean, the central concept is “reality is a computer simulation; programmers exploit this to become actual wizards”. Kind of scratches a similar nerd itch as Ready Player One but is actually good. And if you like Chekhov’s Gun as a trope, this book has an entire Chekhov’s Arsenal.

The Name of the Rose by Umberto Eco

Eco was so damn smart that reading his books makes me feel stupid in comparison, but I’m too busy being fascinated by his knowledge to mind. Ostensibly a murder mystery, but the theology and history are what really shine here. Plus, the ending made me feel like I needed to just sit down in the backyard and stare off into the distance for a few hours. And as I’ve said before, the postscript convinced me that I really need to read Eco’s nonfiction stuff.

Nona the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir

The only book I read this year that was actually release this year. Definitely the odd one out in the series, but having a story that shows what life is like for regular people outside the Nine Houses is something that I didn’t realize the series needed until I read it, plus the flashbacks to pre-Resurrection Earth provided some much-needed context for why Jod is like that.

Fevre Dream by George R. R. Martin

Kind of a shame that you only really see this book recommended in the context of “spooky vampire books for Halloween!” and even then it often gets overlooked. I’m someone who can usually keep my emotions level while reading (my reaction to a lot of notoriously heartbreaking moments in books is usually “yeah, that’s pretty sad” said with a blank face), but this book actually gave me adrenaline rushes at certain points. I was guessing all the way up until the end whether it was going to have a happy ending or not. (I also suspect that Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure, Vampire: the Masquerade, and The Dresden Files all took inspiration from this book, but I don’t think I can prove any of that.) If A Song of Ice and Fire is written like this, I can see why it got so popular.

The Age of Darkness series by Katy Rose Pool

I mentally describe this series as “YA fantasy that subverts the genre by being good instead of bad”. Which is needlessly inflammatory, but it really is nice to read a YA series that goes out of its way to avoid all of the things I dislike about the genre (ex. the second book contains the setup for a love triangle, and then the author just makes it a non-issue). Also, and this will surprise no one, I appreciate how apostatic it gets in the third book.

Worst of the year: I read all of Onision’s books. Do not do this. (I did so in a way that did not involve giving him money, for the record.)

Did not finish: On Beauty by Zadie Smith. To be honest, it’s now my go-to example of “good as in well-constructed, bad as in I hate it” (though hate might be a bit too strong of a word for it). It really is well-written, but about halfway through I realized that this is the least I’ve ever cared about a book’s plot. (I still plan to read something else by the author in the future).

Goals for 2023:

5 nonfiction

3 books that were originally written in a language other than English

3 books that I’ve been meaning to read since middle school

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 195

Holy Terror

“Holy Terror”

Plot Description: the angel war begins, so Sam, Dean, and Castiel investigate; Castiel is captured and Dean wonders if he needs to come clean to Sam about Ezekiel

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: there were no humans in the first five minutes, only angels. And……half of them were brutally killed by the other half. I guess I’m good?

Dean…you can’t have 50 minute conversations IN THE CAR with Ezekiel. Sam’s not dumb.

You would lie, Dean. You’ve been lying all season

OMG CAS! I love when he plays FBI agent. He gets SO EXCITED (and then apparently so do I)

I don’t like how Zeke is keeping Dean and Cas apart, and I don’t even mean that in a shipping way. He’s just driving a wedge between them where one doesn’t need to be driven…UNLESS ZEKE IS AS SHADY AS I’VE ALWAYS THOUGHT

The angels are fightingggggggggg

I ADORE hunter Cas

Ezekiel isn’t Ezekiel??

Cas is so hurt that Dean doesn’t want to work with him because not-Ezekiel is an asshole

Oh…this is this universe’s Aziraphale but not as interesting. He seems to have just straight up failed to keep evil out of Eden…where as Aziraphale didn’t have that responsibility necessarily but was always trying to do the right thing by humans anyway

There were more imprisoned angels Metatron “freed”??

“No more stupid angels, maybe some funny ones” is so unexpected for how serious this part of the show is taking itself

It’s WILD that Cas would think to pray after everything he’s been through, knowing that most angels hate him

Kevin’s back!!

Oh this poor girl, she’s about to die…goddddd, he asked for her help and it got her killed by one of the angel factions

Uh oh. Now Castiel knows Zeke isn’t Zeke…and as soon as he’s out of this situation (because of course he’ll somehow get out of it)

Yeah. No. This angel who’s trying to get Cas to speak to Metatron for him IS a dumb angel. Metatron won’t want him. He says he’s a team player while literally betraying the angel he’s been working for, he says he’s a good soldier but he wants to wait out this war in heaven?? Please

Hoooooooooly shit, Cas just stole that dude’s grace. Bet it’ll be fine for a little while and then the Consequences WILL happen

God. Kevin’s so over these guys. He’s so done with this whole situation. I don’t like how you’re talking to Kevin, Dean. I know it’s…dire but he’s still a very traumatized teen

The name on that piece of paper Metatron gave Gadriel best not be Kevin or Dean….

Yes, phone, I meant Garfield………..

It’s about time Dean came clean about Sam’s angel possession

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. No no no no no nooooooo………….RIP Kevin 😭😭😭😭 you will always be advanced placement in our hearts

And now he’s just become another person Dean has failed. I hate it. I hate all of it.

[pumpumdemsugah]

You can't be annoyed that a show you like was cancelled because colourism lol ( what colourism? ) Why are people inventing hate crimes for the show to commit? Lol

The anti-Semitism this person is on about is the fact the Lilith story was in the show. A show written by a Jewish woman and other Jewish people don't agree that it's anti-semitic but ignore that because I'm painting a righteous narrative. Why is every criticism of first kill exactly like this ? First kill caused covid, is plotting a genocide and made rent to go up

This is funny because no one made any of these claims lol this person did so they can bravely shoot it down, so brave. The entire reason people liked first kill is it wasn't trying to be revolutionary. It was just a fun dumb show with vampires and hijinks but with lesbians. The woman that wrote the story said the show is just meant to be fun and not deep

I don't like the show so I don't support the representation..?? Ok no one cares. How is a show where half the cast is Black, white gay anything?

You'd think one character is neo Nazi the way people are acting. You lot have gotten far too comfortable bossing lesbians around on the internet for the most innocuous shit to the point, people are acting stupid about why someone would be annoyed that something that enjoyed is gone

I don't like a show so you're a bigot for enjoying it and being mad it was cancelled means you take media too seriously unlike me, who's acting like the show committed multiple hate crimes because I said so and you can't call bs on them or its dismissing them because I said so. I'm so brave and so smart omg my god 🙏🏾

Who knew enjoying a fun lesbian vampire show would piss so many people off. People are mad that something they like is gone!? How confusing

[nibeul]

Do you have any Fives headcanons? Weirdly enough he’s the clone with the least, at least from what I can tell. The most I ever found is “he’s a dumbass” which doesn’t even fit his canon self

I only have a few Fives head canons, though I do have an analysis of his character, so I will put that down after listing these:

- Fives was probably a LT by Umbara, at the very least, a CO since he was able to access files (casualty reports) that would typically only be available to COs

- Fives is just as much of a nerd as Echo is, he is just better at hiding it

- Fives enjoys banter, and he likes making witty remarks! We see it a couple times in the show and I wish we had seen more because I find those small interactions really telling for a character 

- Fives probably has a sweet tooth. He just gives off that vibe

Those are really the only HCs that I can think of off the top of my head, however I think that I kind of merge a lot of my ideas with how I perceive canon, so there are probably more that I will brush up on during this analysis! Anyways,

Fives isn’t a himbo. For a bit, I thought calling him a himbo was funny, then people actually, truly believed that he was a himbo and idk, I don’t like the term himbo as much because it’s been used to kinda just.. diminish characters. Especially when it comes to things like, for example, a cultural difference between understanding gender. There is also the problem of reducing all clones to himbos, aka, kinda just.. dumb and attractive which also rubs me the wrong way. 

With Fives, I think a lot of people mistake a trait like “brash” for “stupid” (clumsy too, but being clumsy doesn’t make you dumb.. and he isn’t clumsy 24/7 either). I think that Fives is brash, I think that there are times where he makes decisions with poor forethought for the aftermath (the chip arc does make me think of that), but he is not stupid. He is good at putting contextual clues together, he was able to uncover a plot that was being organized by the Chancellor himself (who had already played the Jedi and the CIS alike), and he’s an ARC trooper. You don’t get there by being dumb, that’s for sure. 

But Fives is also emotionally driven. Here is a quote from the wookieee: “By the time of the Battle of Umbara, Fives showed no qualms in voicing criticisms and concerns with his superiors regarding the treatment of his brothers.[6]This loyalty to his fellow clones would ultimately lead him to his ill-fated investigation into the origins of a bio-chip implanted in the brains of himself and his fellow clones.” He’s intelligent and witty, but he also taps into his emotions when he needs to be objective which.. I think is part of what leads to his downfall. 

Being emotionally driven has its pros and cons, but it does not equate to stupidity. It plays a part in his unconventional problem solving and thinking outside of the box, which is a big part of being an ARC, but it also causes him to overlook some crucial details. This might be me just thinking about him in terms of myself? But he seems like he rushes through things, or that he can rush through things in order to reach the end goal, which is what I meant when I call him “brash”. Because Fives is emotionally driven, he doesn’t want to conform and he understands himself better than he would if he were like.. Dogma for example, or even Jesse. He wants more for himself and for others. When I think of Fives, I think of someone with a strong sense of justice and moral compass; he might be headstrong, but he’s compassionate and willing to go to the end for his brothers. 

So that is my analysis of Fives, sorry for the ramble! 

[homemade-ghosts]

thoughts on this? i see people freaking out over it but to me i think it’s fine because even if it’s true this just makes them even less endgame in my eyes and will make anymore that ships them (if they’re still together by the end of s3 and he takes that offer) weirdos. if they’re not broken up by the end of s3 bc they think him being a student teacher who can stay around will fix their relationship then they’re imo definitely done by 4a bc there is absolutely no way.

I agree 100% with everything they said in their response. I'm not sure where that anon got the idea that Miss Jenn was going to offer EJ an Assistant Theatre Director-type job in ep 6 since, as we can see now that the episode is out, she doesn't. Maybe they meant that, even though she doesn't literally offer him the job this ep, the fact that she gives EJ directorial advice could allude to them possibly working together next season? Or they were just lying lol

Regardless, I'm not the least bit concerned. Before season 3 started, I was pretty convinced that EJ was going to get off of the waitlist at some college outside of Utah (funny, because I pictured it going down almost exactly like the whole "Caswell Success School letter from EJ's dad" situation happened, expect I thought he would be telling Val about his college acceptance letter) and, after a lot of agonizing, EJ would ultimately decide to go & the group would turn the cast party after opening night into a going away party for him. He'd leave for college at the end of summer and be effectively written off of the show, in a way that still left it open for Matt to come back in a guest-starring capacity, for holidays/school breaks/to come see the opening nights of future musicals...but, when we were a few episodes into this (short) season and still hadn't gotten a single mention of EJ's post-grad plans, I figured from then on that he was staying in SLC and would be in season 4.

Right now, EJ's character exists to be a road block and plot device for Rina and, once pw break up next episode, he'll have served his purpose and will no longer be relevant to the story. I think Tim knows that. I've heard him talk about how integral certain characters are to the series, but when he gets to EJ, it's never about that. It's always, "Matt's such a good guy." "He's great to work with!" "I couldn't imagine doing the show without him because he's just so nice." (not direct quotes because I'm too lazy to go looking for the articles right now lol, so I paraphrased). Tim's reason for keeping EJ around, IMO, has nothing to do with the character and everything to do with him liking Matt as a person. So, truthfully, I could see Miss Jenn offering EJ a job in the finale, simply because Tim wants to keep Matt on the show as regular (or semi-regular) cast member and that's really the only way to do it. It's dumb and kind of weird (you should not be hanging around your old high school after you graduate) but not surprising.

As for what this means for EJ & Gina? Honestly, I don't think it makes a difference as far as their likelihood of getting back together after they breakup (either before or during Camp Prom). It'd be zero if EJ was written off the show and it's still zero if he stays. They are fundamentally incompatible and at two completely different, conflicting places in their lives. The show has gone out of its way to tell us that and that's not something that's going to change, no matter where EJ is physically.

As much as I just don't think the show needs EJ after this season (sorry to Matt) at least if he stays, he'd be put in a position of authority (it's both laughable and really concerning that pws think this would help their relationship, as if a Disney+ show would ever encourage any kind of romantic relationship between a student and someone who is, like, a half step down from a teacher and a legal adult. Yikes on yikes on yikes). + it would mean that they won't be able to use the same stupid/nonsensical argument for why pw isn't together that they're using for why Rini isn't together. I constantly hear people say things like, "if Olivia was on the show, they'd get back together..." or "The only reason Ricky & Gina are getting together is because Olivia left and they had to rewrite the whole show" and it annoys me to no end because it's just fundamentally untrue. So, if/when Matt comes back for season 4, at least they can't say EJ & Gina aren't together because he left.

[florrickandassociates]

TGF Thoughts: 5x06- And the two partners had a fight...

I’ve been waiting for this episode for nearly a decade, and I didn’t even realize it. More under the cut. 

(This is very long! Please fight me on stuff and disagree because I just wrote all these words about this episode and I STILL want to talk about it more, it was that interesting!) 

This is the second episode in a row to start off with a TikTok video. 5x02 and 5x03 both ended with elevators. Is there some sort of pattern they’re going for here?  

This case—which is, it’s important to note, in Wackner’s court—is about TikTok content creators and copyright laws. Probably not enough material for a full case, but definitely an interesting theme to explore.

Marissa doesn’t have her laptop volume off (which I suppose makes sense; she was just playing the TikTok videos) and a notification sounds. She shuts the laptop.

Wackner rules that the profits made from the TikTok dance must be split evenly between the guy who stole the dance for his video game and the creator. The thief does not like this, removes his moose costume (oh, yeah, did I mention they’re in costumes again?), and starts shouting that he’s going to sue and then moons the whole court. Okay!

He follows through on his threat, and next thing we know, Liz, Cord, Wackner, and Marissa are meeting to discuss strategy.

Liz’s computer makes the same noise Marissa’s did; she punches some keys.

Liz points out that Wackner’s biggest problem is that real judges are not going to like Wackner playacting as a judge. “I’m not playing a judge. I am a judge,” Wackner says. Liz notes that Wackner’s court lacks any way of forcing people to comply with his rulings, but real court can shut him down.

I guess whatever keys Liz punched did not silence the annoying notification sound.

She asks Wackner to try not to become the focus of the court case, since that’s how they’ll lose. “This is why I started a court,” Wackner says after Liz instructs him to only answer yes or no and to wear a suit.  

Liz asks Marissa to keep Wackner in line. She says she’ll try.

Now we are at the Black Lawyers Association, where there’s a panel with leaders from Chicago’s four top black law firms. For reasons passing understanding, DIANE is on this panel. This makes absolutely no sense (I mean, unless only white people were involved in this decision, and even then!) and I’ll only excuse it because they mention later that it makes no sense for Diane to have been on this panel.  

I wonder why everyone else’s firm gets named but not Diane’s.  

Diane also gets the first question, which is, pointedly, about opportunities for black lawyers. Her phone starts making the annoying notification sound. Ever heard of silent mode??  

The annoying sound happens every five seconds at the RL offices. According to David Lee, it happens twenty times an hour, but it seems like more than that! He, for some reason, goes to Carmen to ask how to stop the sound. He also wants to know what it is. Carmen explains that it is “Dawnk” which is a new messaging system within the company.  

On Dawnk, you can talk about anything you want and be anonymous. Who approved this?! In one frame, I can see there’s someone complaining about someone being promoted too fast because of “the future is female bs.” In another, someone is upset that they are anonymous and wants to use their real name (only Jay, who is otherwise absent from this episode, seems to have figured out how to turn this anon mode off).

Sorry, before I can get on board with this plot, I just need to note for the record how phenomenally stupid the idea of using anonymous messaging software within a company is. This was obviously not going to end well! It’s like workplace YikYak... (remember YikYak?!)  

David Lee hates the idea of a messaging software; Carmen says the associates prefer this.  

Jay is being very nice in the chat and defends the person who was promoted “too fast”.

“Who’s ‘Anonymous Crab’?” David Lee asks. Well, I think the fact they are “anonymous” should be a bit of a hint there, David.  

Anonymous Crab asks, “How the hell did this happen??! How did Diane end up at a Black Conference speaking for our firm?” Good question, Anonymous Crab.

Anon Crab also shares a video and David Lee doesn’t understand how to press play. Carmen plays it for him. Diane looks really awful on the panel. No shit! David Lee seems to enjoy Diane looking bad, even though he should be able to connect the dots between Diane looking bad and potential for bad things to come for the firm...  

Not only does Diane get quizzed about why she’s running a firm that is still insisting on calling itself a black firm, she also gets questions about her insurrectionist husband. “He was completely cleared of those charges,” Diane notes. Oh, hey!!!!! Remember how last week I said I’d be more surprised if that was the end of the FBI nonsense than if it continued? I am surprised!! And relieved. Mostly relieved. Dealing with the consequences of that high profile, relationship-straining ordeal is so much more interesting to me than any FBI machinations.  

Next Diane is asked if Kurt just took a job to revitalize the NRA. She hasn’t heard of this yet. I’m glad she’s getting grilled on this stuff... it is about time.  

There’s a hint that Carmen will be representing Mr. Rapey next week. I assume that’s why there’s a line where David checks in with Carmen on Mr. Rapey’s case?  

Anon Platypus says, “I heard she didn’t even have seniority. She just jumped past other black partners to become our name partner. It’s crazy!!!” Anon Platypus is correct—technically. Diane was a name partner at one of Chicago’s top firms before joining RL, so while she skipped the line... that doesn’t seem to me like the PRIMARY issue in bringing her on. The primary issue is that bringing on someone that senior from outside the company is more similar to a merger than a promotion, and Diane’s partnership meant changes for the firm.  

Other anonymous animals also don’t like Diane. One calls her clueless; another says that “Liz needs to do something about this.” Someone responds to that, “Liz will never do it on her own,” which is an interesting sentiment I want to come back to in a little bit.  

“What is Black Twitter?” David Lee asks Liz out of the blue. “People on Twitter who are black and talk to each other,” Liz responds. David Lee asks how he can find it. “I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you,” Liz jokes. And to think Jay said Liz wasn’t funny!  

The Dawnk conversation shifts and now everyone’s ragging on Julius for representing Kurt and just generally being a Trump voter. There’s a lot of heated and racial language I’m not going to type here, enough to make Julius spit out his coffee and storm down to the associate floor.

He goes to Devin, who I’m not sure if we’ve seen before but is high ranking enough to have Lucca’s old office, to get information on the anonymous posts.

Anonymous Bison says, “Unpopular opinion: I blame Adrian.” Hey, Anon Bison, let’s be friends! I am with you. Adrian is the one who brought Diane on, who encouraged them to lean into Julius’s Trump connections, and who pushed the firm to pursue profit over everything else. Diane and Julius aren’t blameless (though I don’t actually think defending Kurt is a bad thing) but if there’s someone who actively strategized to make RL what it is today? Adrian all the way.  

In what world does noting that Julius is pissed in an anonymous message do ANYTHING to stop people who are pissed at him? If they were that concerned about him being pissed they wouldn’t have said anything in the first place.  

Liz and opposing counsel talk over each other in court until the judge makes them stop. I think we’ve seen both the judge and opposing counsel this season, making me wonder if there’s a bit of a COVID bubble situation going on here with the guest stars.  

Judge Farley jokes about “contempt cards” that go up in value and Wackner, of course, is all, “Wow, I really love that.”  

Liz, whose entire strategy was to not let on that anyone calls Wackner a judge, refers to Wackner as “Judge Wackner.” Come on, Liz! (I buy that she’d slip up—there's no one in the world I wouldn’t believe slipping up—but ugh!)  

How did the opposition not realize that they could make this about Wackner’s “crazy court” by referring to him as Judge Wackner? You’d think they’d be all over that.  

Judge Farley looks SO unhappy that Wackner would refer to himself as a judge; it’s phenomenal.  

Now Marissa stumbles over stuff because she’s, for some reason, speaking in court. I bought Liz’s dumb moment more.  

The plaintiff’s strategy is to make it look like Wackner is of unsound mind, and they’ve got video evidence. Remember how Del, Cord, and Wackner all chatted in the RL elevator? Well, turns out that lead to a reality show about Wackner for Del’s streaming service. Sounds about right.  

I don’t really think Wackner cares about attention or anyone else’s motivations... I think he just likes the idea of budget and an audience and a platform.  

Liz meets Del for a romantic dinner and asks him when he was going to tell her about Wackner’s show. Del doesn’t understand why she’s upset. He doesn’t get why he would’ve needed her permission to go into business with Wackner. (I don’t think he’s wrong from a business POV, but from a relationship POV, he totally should’ve let her know!)  

Liz says he should’ve asked because they’re using it against her in court. “That is unfortunate, baby, but this streaming show could be really good for Wackner. It’ll draw attention to his court. And... as I say that...that sounds... okay, look I’m sorry,” Del realizes. I like that he sees that Liz has a point. He goes on to note that he would be totally open to Liz trying to go into business with any of his acquaintances, and I think he genuinely means it.  

Del notes that this is what “power couples” do. Oh? So they’re an official couple? Don’t power couples also associate in public and not hide their relationship from their colleagues?  

This is the place where I note, yet again, that it is always going to be more interesting to see a relationship that feels realistic than to see a relationship that feels like it takes place in a vacuum.  

Liz doesn’t want Wackner becoming popular. Del argues someone else would’ve made the show if he didn’t, and that “disrupters gotta disrupt.” Oh God.  

Are we going to remember that Liz has a child at any point this season?  

Diane is reading the Dawnk discussion at home. It’s still lively even after work hours. The associates appear to be discussing the vaccine before someone changes the topic to “the Diane situation.”

One associate notes that the partners probably aren’t happy about Diane either and just have to vote her out. Kurt arrives home as Diane reads this, reacts to the loud music Diane has playing, the open alcohol, and her general demeanor and asks if they’re getting drunk. “Are we getting a job with the NRA?” she counters.  

Turns out it’s not entirely untrue about Kurt and the NRA. They want him for a new role. It would pay $167,000. I can’t decide if I think that’s a lot (objectively that’s a high salary) or not very much at all (isn’t Kurt the top of his field?)  

Kurt notes he doesn’t have a job so he’s considering it. “Diane, our politics are very different,” he starts. “I know,” Diane says. “I’m, lately, struck by just how different they are.”

“I would just like one week when I don’t have to defend you,” Diane says in frustration. Kurt doesn’t even know what that means at the current moment.  

“You’ll tell me when they offer you the job?” Diane asks. “They may not offer it,” Kurt says. “No, they will,” Diane says, because she knows that it’s basically a done deal already.  

In the middle of the night, Diane turns to Kurt and tries to ask him a question. That wakes him up. She asks who he voted for in 2020 and he doesn’t answer. Uh oh.  

Dreaming now, Diane sits up and asks, “Hello? What do I do?” More on that later...

The HR nightmare known as Dawnk is still going wild the next day at the office. (Seriously, with HR that strict, the anon feature would’ve been disabled the second the first semi-controversial comment was posted.) Everyone’s obsessed.  

The partners, minus Diane, all gather in Liz’s office to discuss Dawnk (and the topics of conversation on Dawnk). Madeline says they should ignore it. I say they should make STR Laurie shut it down and be the bad guy. It is nonsensical that this workplace would continue to allow Dawnk to continue! In addition to being an HR nightmare, it’s also a drain on productivity if everyone’s constantly glued to it, and I imagine STR Laurie cares about profit more than anything else.  

But like I really don’t get why Madeline says they can’t censor their associates. Of course they can shut down the app if they want to! Someone put the app there in the first place, no? I do understand not wanting to look like you’re violating free speech (even though taking away anonymous commenting in the workplace would not be a violation of free speech) but I highly doubt it would be only the partners complaining. Tina, whose promotion was called into question, would be complaining too. Anyone trying to get work done, or anyone who didn’t like the toxic culture, or anyone who was uncomfortable with a joke made, would be complaining. There are more than enough reasons it would be perfectly acceptable to take the anon commenting away.

Now the partners are fighting about Kurt’s case too. “Diane is not responsible for her husband,” Liz says when Madeline says that Diane should’ve known better than to get involved. Um, Liz, Madeline is right. Diane isn’t responsible for Kurt’s actions but she’s sure as hell responsible for volunteering to represent him.  

“In the real world of this firm, Diane’s billable hours speak for themselves,” Liz notes when a partner tries to call Diane’s unsavory associations into question.  

“The rest of us put in the hours too, for the record,” notes another partner. I’m sure... but do you put in DIANE’S hours and have DIANE’S client list? My guess is no. If Diane weren’t the biggest earner at the firm we wouldn’t be having this debate. She’d just be gone. She’d never have been at the firm to begin with.  

“Liz, when I joined this firm, it was because of your father’s legacy. It was about Black civil rights, activism, justice. That’s what people talked about in meetings. Now, people talk about billable hours, million-dollar clients, corporate payouts. Now, I know it’s not your fault. That was Boseman’s vision and we were trying to survive the Trump years by bringing in white lawyers, but those days are gone. They’re done with. And I miss being a strong black firm,” Madeline says. Everyone but Liz (and probably Julius) seems to agree with that.

This is one of many interesting facets of this issue. When Madeline argues against Diane, she’s not just arguing that she wants a black person running the firm for optics. She’s not saying that Diane-but-black would be an acceptable choice. She is saying she wants RL to be the firm it was at the very very start of the show—a firm committed to social justice, not maximizing revenue. A firm that didn’t just accept every client that came their way because they love profit. A firm that stood for something. So my question is: Does Liz want that firm?  

Liz is hard to read throughout this whole plot, and I think that may be intentional. Liz isn’t a manager by training—she was an AUSA who suddenly became a name partner at a firm (if you want to talk about seniority and skipping the line, Liz is a way better example than Diane—you can even through some nepotism, twice over, in there). She doesn’t seem to have a clear goal for her firm other than maintaining the status quo and keeping power. Liz not taking a stronger stance from the start (either accepting that they are no longer going to be a social justice-oriented firm or pushing to get them back to that place) allows these kinds of questions to fester. It’s my hope that this becomes text instead of subtext pretty soon, ‘cause this is the kind of thing that if it’s subtext for too long will start to feel like bad writing/Liz being conveniently clueless. It’s way more interesting if Liz is just not yet good at being a manager... because she is learning on the job.  

Anyway. I think the ideal solution here is probably that Diane and Liz continue to run RL: A STR Laurie Company (the fact they’re owned by corporate overlords kind of makes any decision about RL’s mission moot) since Diane wants to do that and Liz seems to be content where she is. Madeline and the other partners, instead of trying to force STRL to let them pursue the cases they want, can accept pay cuts and go start their own firm. Maybe they can even team up with Barbara Kolstad!  

None of that’s to say that the dilemma here is easily solvable, nor is it to say that Diane shouldn’t consider stepping down. I’ll say more on that later. My point here is just that this issue is much deeper than just if Diane is on the letterhead or not. As long as they’re owned by STR Laurie and have clients like Rivi, Diane stepping aside would just be a band-aid.  

(And that, I think, is intentional... they’ve been building the “why are we even representing x?” tension pretty consistently this season, so I imagine it’s on the writers’ minds.)  

Diane stumbles across the secret partner’s meeting and knows something’s up.  

“You gotta handle this, Liz. You cannot have a white partner leading a black firm. We’ll lose clients with that kind of hypocrisy” Madeline insists after Diane heads back to her office. I’ve already said it, but just to say it in a less rambly way: Madeline is right, but she’s right IF AND ONLY IF the goal is to be a black firm. So, Liz, is it?  

(They’ll lose clients, sure, but which ones? They’ll lose the clients Madeline wants while Diane continues to keep bringing in business and Rivi and Cord and Wolfe-Colman and their elk* stay put.)  

*I know this is not the correct word; see 6x17 of TGW

David Lee has also noticed the meeting in Liz’s office and thinks this may be the “beginning of the end.” Diane glares at him and he says he was just joking.

Diane schedules a meeting with Liz. Liz’s assistant doesn’t know Diane by voice, adding to her frustration.

Credits! We are 22 minutes in! This might be a record if 5x01 hadn’t saved the credits til the very end!  

I’ve already written more than I did last week by a couple hundred words.  

Two interesting things about the credits. First, this episode was written by Aurin Squire. Forgive me if I’ve mentioned this in a prior recap (I know I thought about it but can’t remember if I deleted), but I think Aurin Squire and Davita Scarlett are key to why TGF and Evil are both always so good. They’re the two writers other than the Kings who are in both the TGF and Evil rooms, and they both REALLY seem to be on the same wavelength as the Kings. I imagine that having four people who are in both rooms helps with managing both at basically the same time.  

(This isn’t where I wanted to go with this bullet point, but I may as well shout out how great Evil is this season, too! It also just aired an episode by Aurin Squire about the lead white female character realizing her privilege!)  

Second, this episode was directed by Brooke Kennedy. I didn’t know that going in, but seconds before the director credit popped up, I was thinking to myself, “this episode feels like it’s going to be a very important one. I bet Brooke directed it.” I was very pleased to see her name appear.  

(For anyone who doesn’t know, Brooke is an EP who’s been involved in nearly every episode of both Wife and Fight and she tends to direct important episodes that require a lot of familiarity with the characters. She directed 5x15 of The Good Wife and she’s done a bunch of the premieres and finales that Robert King hasn’t claimed for himself.)  

Diane and Liz meet in a bar to catch up. Diane’s still staring at Dawnk. Liz takes her phone and silences the notifications. “Who thought that sound was pleasing?” Diane complains. “All day in court today,” Liz commiserates. Carmen had to teach her how to silence the notifications. Liz, you’re using an iPhone, there is a very easy to use switch that silences your phone, like you would need to for court. I know you know this.  

(I think Diane, despite her complaining about the sound, is captivated by Dawnk.)  

Liz orders soda water instead of a drink. I assume that’s intentional, perhaps because she knows this isn’t going to be an easy conversation or a long night of drinking? She has wine in an earlier scene.  

I love that Liz and Diane chat about Dawnk even though there’s no real plot reason for them to spend this much time discussing it. Little moments like this make me believe Liz and Diane are actually colleagues who get along well and make management decisions together.  

Diane asks if Liz thinks Dawnk actually increases productivity. Liz laughs—she does not. But she knows the associates would “riot” if they got rid of it. She’s right. I still think they can get rid of it without too much blowback. But at least they’re acknowledging this.  

“What do the partners think?” Diane asks, very intentionally shifting the subject. You can hear it in Christine’s voice and see it in her body language—Diane is looking for an opportunity to talk about what she wants to talk about.

“God, Madeline can’t even open it. She’s lost her password three times. She finally just gave up,” Liz says. This is concerning! Madeline should know how to open an app! Probably not unrealistic, though. When you’re that senior, you probably don’t need to know how to use a messaging app. And messaging apps can be confusing sometimes. Like, I still don’t understand how to use Discord.  

The captions have a line I can’t hear in this scene—Liz (I presume?) saying “You know, ‘cause it’s Madeline.” This makes it sound like Madeline is a little less than competent, no?  

“Thanks for sitting down with me, Liz,” Diane says in a quite serious tone. “Of course. So, you’re wondering about the meeting today?” Liz immediately understands. “I am.” “Yeah. Uh, it was about Julius. He’s being harassed on Dawnk,” Liz explains.

“Okay, and I couldn’t be a part of that?” Diane wants to know. “He’s being harassed because he’s defending your husband,” Liz explains. Diane doesn’t seem surprised (perhaps because she, too, would have read these messages?). “Well, that’s unfortunate. We’ve represented people far worse than Kurt, who, by the way, was found innocent,” Diane argues like they’re having a very different conversation. It’s one thing to represent rapists and murderers and drug lords—and I’d argue that the same people pissed about Kurt are also pissed about them!-- and another for your leadership to be married to/close friends with someone who you believe participated in the events of 1/6.  

“I’m not saying it wasn’t. But, January 6th. I mean, we watched the Confederate flag make its way into the Capitol building. You know, those people that Kurt didn’t want to turn over to the FBI, those people. They don’t even want us alive,” Liz says better than I ever could. I think it’s important that Liz mentions a POV that likely wouldn’t have ever crossed Diane’s mind here. This is a small glimpse of why it could be so important to have black leadership at a black firm. Would Diane be thinking about the implications of having the Confederate flag in the Capitol? Probably not in the same way that Liz instantly does.  

“Well, not all of them,” Diane Lockhart, who is suddenly an idiot, says. Liz looks at her drink and grimaces, and Diane realizes she’s said something wrong. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I’m certainly not defending those people. They’re all despicable traitors.”

“And now, that’s what people are saying about Julius,” Liz explains. “And me?” Diane asks, though she already knows the answer. Liz doesn’t want to answer that. Before she can say anything, Diane asks if she’s being pushed out.  

“No. Not pushed out. You’re a name partner. You can’t be pushed out,” Liz clarifies. Diane knows there’s a but. “The partners just think you should do the right thing,” Liz adds.

“And step aside?” Diane asks. “No. Stay in the firm. Stay as an equity partner, just step back from your managerial role,” Liz says. Diane pauses. “Liz, I... I pull in the big clients. I... I get the billable hours. But still, ‘maybe you should step aside.’ Weren’t we going to form a firm led by women?” Diane argues. Oh, wow, I have so much to say.

First, I completely understand why Diane doesn’t want to give up her title or her power. She's Diane Lockhart! She’s been one of the best in her field for decades. She’s not wrong about the clients and billable hours. It’s just that every time Diane decides to be at this firm, making arguments about how she should retain her role in power, she’s saying that she values her own career/appearance more than the values she claims to care about. And every time she refuses to take a back seat or threatens to walk rather than sacrifice, she’s saying she’ll only through her weight behind her colleagues and their mission if she gets credit for it. To be clear, I don’t think it would be the shittiest decision in the world if Diane decided to walk, to take her clients to a new firm and to let RL become the firm Madeline and the rest envision. It’s asking a lot of her to give up that power and prestige. The interesting part of this dilemma is, to me, that Diane claims to value working for RL and to be active in the fight against racism... but the second she’s forced to choose between that fight and her own power, we all know what Diane is going to choose. There was never really any doubt. Diane doesn’t have to be on the forefront of this fight if she doesn’t want to... but she can’t claim to be invested in the fight if she isn’t willing to sacrifice, at all.

Second, LMAO at this firm led by women idea. Every time Diane talks about her firm led by women idea it sounds sillier! Not because a firm led by women is silly, but because Diane has a habit of saying this like it is a shared goal and each time she references it, it sounds less and less intersectional. For example, when she says it here, she’s essentially saying a firm led by women only has meaning if one of those women is a white woman (specifically a white woman named Diane Lockhart). Who’s to say that Madeline wouldn’t be made partner in Diane’s absence? Or Barbara (haha) or someone else we haven’t met? There is a very real possibility that Liz and another woman could run the firm and Diane would still be unhappy about it. Diane doesn’t ask Liz for a commitment that if she does step aside, her replacement would be female (idk if it’s legal to make this commitment but you get my point). Diane acts like asking her to step aside is already a betrayal of the female led firm.  

“And I hope that it will be,” Liz says, basically hinting to Diane that there are women in the world besides her.  

“But black women?” Diane says, agitatedly. “Diane, I... am not voting against you. I promised you that I wouldn’t. But there is growing anger here. They want to address it at the next partners' meeting. So just think about it,” Liz responds.

I think Liz is totally fair and forthcoming in this scene and strikes pretty much the right tone for this initial conversation. She gives Diane a choice and is honest with her.  

“You’re a good person,” Liz adds. Diane does a double-take, understanding that Liz is actually telling her “You are a good person, so you know that you absolutely need to step aside.”  

“No, I’m not!” Diane responds. As I said: Diane already knows what she is going to do. She needs to do mental gymnastics to excuse her actions, but her mind was made up before the question was even raised. (She did warn Liz in 5x01 she was going to fight any attempt to push her out.)

“Yes, you are,” Liz says again. She may as well be saying, “No, don’t try this. Everyone will think you’re in the wrong if you push this.”

Later, at home, Diane is doing some stretches on the floor and groaning. I don’t know if this scene is meant to show her age, but it does remind me that Diane is nearly 70 and started off this show by planning to retire. Retirement doesn’t seem to be an option for her here. (That’s fine by me; she is a workaholic whose career is her life.)

Kurt asks Diane what she wants to do. She says she wants to keep her name on the letterhead and “keep what I fought for.” Heh, I was just re-reading something I wrote about Cary a while ago and I’d pointed out that when Alicia and Cary discuss merging with what’s left of LG, Cary is also concerned about his name on the letterhead because even though he wants to change the world, he also cares about having power. It’s almost like Diane and Cary are really similar characters! (They are! That’s why the Diane/Cary moment in Hitting the Fan is so good!)  

Diane calls her position as name partner a fight against “gender and then age discrimination.” She isn’t wrong, especially when you consider how meaningful it likely was when she and Stern went into business together. It’s very easy for me to forget that when Diane has such an attachment to fighting for white women’s rights, it’s not just because she’s out of touch and selfish: it’s because that was something she personally had to fight for. That doesn’t make it okay that she seems to forget the concept of intersectionality (which she’s definitely aware of) the second anything challenges her own power, but it does explain why a firm run by women is so important to her.

Diane is not wrong that she deserves name partnership and she’s not wrong to not want to step aside. Yet, starting a war to retain her position as name partner is a CHOICE. The best thing for Diane to do here (morally, I mean) would be for her to step aside and throw her resources behind the firm’s new leadership, using her experiences and stature to benefit the firm (this would also be a way for her to cement her legacy and mentor a new generation of leaders). The best compromise, I think, would be for someone to leave the current firm—either Diane or the dissenting partners, probably Diane since Liz seems to agree with Madeline—without any hard feelings. The worst possible choice is for Diane to insist that this firm is hers and force every single tension at the firm to come to a head, screwing over Liz in the process and potentially permanently ruining the firm’s status as a black firm. Sooo... yeah.  

(I say it could ruin the firm’s status as a black firm because if Diane’s a white partner who happens to be there and the firm is mostly black, that’s one thing. If Diane is a white partner who fought all of the black partners to assert her own dominance over their firm... that’s hard to come back from. She can’t really call herself an ally, can she?)  

“Diane, this is the first time I’ve ever heard you sound defeated,” Kurt says. “Because I can’t win this,” she says. She insists she can’t even after Kurt tries to cheer her on (of course he does, he probably thinks having an all black firm is just identity politics and therefore worthless).

“You just don’t want to,” Kurt says. He is not wrong. This is a winnable fight for Diane. Liz is smart but Diane has the experience, the clients, the power, and her own reputation to use in this fight. Liz has her dad’s name (and I don’t think it would come to this, but Diane knows how she can pretty easily destroy Liz’s dad’s reputation). (Liz is great, don’t get me wrong. Liz is also someone who happened into a name partnership because her dad was important.)  

“It’s bigger than that. To fight this would go against every fiber of my being,” Diane says. “Every fiber in your being is about winning,” Kurt counters. Oh, damn. That’s a succinct way of putting it. He is completely right. Diane would love to think that every fiber of her being is about her commitment to social justice and women’s rights. It is not. If that were the case, would she really be a lawyer with clients like ChumHum, Bishop, Sweeney, Rivi, and Wolfe-Colman? We all know the answer to this. We all know Diane likes social justice a lot but winning, wealth, and power far more.

When I first watched TGW, now nearly a decade ago, I was a high schooler and my media diet mostly consisted of Desperate Housewives and a bunch of procedurals like Bones and Castle. The thing that hooked me about TGW—more than Alicia’s journey, more than anything—was that TGW never had easy answers to anything. Will tells Diane in 1x07 that “nothing here is pure and nothing here is simple” and that basically blew my mind. TGW always made it obvious that Will was morally gray, which fascinated me. But I struggled with Diane. Here was this woman who looked like she should be someone so impressive and inspirational I could write a college admissions essay about her (I did not, but that was my frame of reference at the time)… but the decisions she made... never seemed all that great?? I couldn’t comprehend it.  

When Blue Ribbon Panel aired in March 2012, I wrote to a friend, “Diane confused me a little bit tonight. She didn’t approve of Alicia standing up to the panel, and yet, she’s supposed to care about people, the truth, morality, etc etc. I never understand Diane’s motivations– is her philosophy to help others whenever it wouldn’t hurt her, personally, to do so?”  

At that point, Diane compromising her values struck me as something confusing because I wanted to think of her as a powerful role model and icon, and I didn’t know what to do with someone who looked like and often was role model material who also sometimes betrayed her values for her own self-interest. I had my analysis of Diane down: she her motivations ARE to help others whenever it wouldn’t hurt her, personally, to do so. All I needed to do was remove my question mark from the end of that thought.  

I promise I’ll move on from quoting myself, but I also want to share a paragraph I wrote about Diane in March 2014 (during season five of Wife) because it says what I want to say now as well as anything I could write today:

Diane is driven and ambitious. Her initial actions can come as the result of intense emotions, but given enough time and space, Diane will always be strategic and pragmatic when it comes to business. She’s spent her entire life putting her career first, and she wouldn’t have it any other way. That she found love is just icing.  Kurt aside, the two most important things to Diane are advancing her own self-interest and doing good in the world. These objectives appear to be a contradiction, and often, they are. Nine times out of ten, when it comes down to it, she’ll choose herself. I mean no judgment here: another central aspect of Diane’s character is that she’s upfront about her choices and stands by them, and this sort of moral ambiguity makes for a great character.  

The reason I quote myself here is not to be like, ha ha, I was right. It's because I think this episode is even more powerful because I can copy/paste in stuff I wrote nine years ago or seven years ago (oh god, 2014 was seven years ago?) verbatim and it can hold up as analysis. Both Fight and Wife have always implied Diane’s selfish side and given more than enough evidence to make a convincing argument about it, but they’ve never really engaged with it directly (and if you ask the social media teams for either show, Diane is a #queen who can never do wrong). This episode interrogates something that’s always been an unpleasant part of Diane’s character, and I’m so fucking glad about it.  

(I don’t think anyone’s accusing Diane of not growing as a person but it crossed my mind that this could be seen as lack of growth. I don’t think it is. I wouldn’t expect Diane to change. Her life and career are so set that growth on this without a LOT of struggle on her part would feel like a cop out.)  

Another reason I quote myself is to highlight how friggin’ character driven this episode is. I’ve seen a lot of people saying this episode felt like old-school TGW—and it absolutely does; that’s also how I felt—and I think that’s because it’s so character focused and meaty.  

But back to this scene. Kurt tells Diane that if she doesn’t try to win she should just give up entirely. Seems like bad advice.  

“Kurt, I appreciate the pep talk, but I don’t think the way you think. I cannot put my interests above a whole group of people—black people—just so I can keep my position.” Sure you can, Diane. You just don’t like to believe that about yourself. You know how Diane says to Kurt earlier that she knows the NRA will offer him the job? That is how I feel about this scene. The writers go to great lengths to explain where Diane’s head is at when she decides to fight for her partnership, but they’d have needed to do ten times more to get me to believe Diane would step aside voluntarily.  

Kurt basically thinks that Diane should fight because if her competition is actually talented enough to deserve name partnership, they should fight her for it. He’s missing the point here.  

“But a black person’s talent has always been valued less than mine,” Diane counters. The fact she knows and understands this makes her decision even less forgivable.  

Kurt knows he’s going to lose this argument and tries the same strategy he did on 5x01: telling Diane she’s right and should just give up and leave the firm. Diane doesn’t like that answer either.  

Given how much I loathed Jay’s hallucinations, I was expecting that when Diane asks Kurt in the middle of the night if he believes the election was stolen and then sits down at her fireplace to have a chat with Ruth Bader Ginsburg, I’d loathe what happened next. I did not! I actually really liked it!  

I think this is more effective than Jay’s hallucinations, at least for me, because it's less gimmicky. It isn’t played for humor or quirk, and it gets to the character-driven point a LOT faster. This feels more similar to Alicia imagining Gloria Steinem is telling her she’s good enough to be on the Supreme Court in 6x03 than it does to Jay’s hallucinations.  

I LOVE that Diane would dream that RBG would advise her on her work dilemma. Dream!RBG tells Diane that “any law firm would be insane to let you go.” (I don’t wanna spend too much time fighting dream logic, but I feel like the operative phrase here is ‘let you go’. Are the RL partners seeing this as letting Diane go? Or are they just trying to get at a different goal and Diane is in the way, and they don’t really care if Diane has top connections or billable hours? It’s almost like the other RL partners want a firm that stands for something and all Diane has stood for thus far at the firm is profit...)  

Diane pushes back on RBG and RBG shares her “real” thoughts. This is where this sequence clicks into place for me, because it’s working on a LOT of levels. Obviously, Diane is going to imagine that her hero tells her to do exactly what she wants to do (the aforementioned mental gymnastics). But without losing the level on which this is dream!RBG and filtered through Diane’s POV, the writers are also... criticizing RBG for not stepping down herself!? It’s fascinating and pointed and makes her the exact right choice to play Diane’s conscience.  

Dream!RBG shares her life story and notes how she was always asked to step aside, but she didn’t and that’s how she got to be RBG. “Don’t step aside because someone wants you to. Don’t step aside for politics. Men are always asking women to step aside so a man can go first,” RBG advises Diane. Even Diane knows that this isn’t exactly equal to her current situation-- “Even though I’m being asked to step aside so that a black person can take my place?” she counters.  

So RBG asks if Diane can still do something “for women” if she says. Diane says yes, and RBG says Diane should do that instead of stepping aside—she should do whatever it takes. That’s the wrong takeaway, Diane! If you want to do something for women then a) you could do something for the black women at your firm lol or b) you could politely remove yourself from the firm, encourage your most profitable clients to stay on if they are wanted by the other partners or and/or c) you could choose to bring your talent and your stature to a non-profit. But, of course, these options aren’t on the table. There’s a reason the options are leave and lose everything or stay and fight for name partnership, and it’s that Diane cares about maintaining control of what she sees as hers and winning more than she cares about anything else, including or even especially her desire to help women.

And also what women is she even helping at RL? Herself? She’s certainly not helping Wolfe-Coleman's rape victim. The closest she’s recently come to helping women is when she told off Weinstein’s lawyer and tried to start #MeToo... in a DREAM.  

The score for the next sequence sounds so familiar and I can’t place it. At first, I thought it was Hitting the Fan, but I’m not sure if that’s the right reference (also, damn, the Hitting the Fan score is REALLY GOOD!). I think it might be similar to 5x14 when Alicia’s pacing back and forth in the hotel room.  

Anyway, Diane starts meeting with her (white, male) clients to tell them about how she’s stepping aside. She hasn’t run this past any of the other partners, of course. She’s doing exactly what they want, in the most malicious and calculated way possible.

One of her clients is a fracking client who wants to win over democrats by being a RL client.  

Diane is so sneaky here! No one said that if Diane steps aside as partner she can’t handle the day to day on her cases... yet that’s what Diane tells this client since she knows it’ll make him mad!  

Diane makes a point of showing her fracking client that his new representation will be Madeline. He doesn’t know anything about Madeline, and, as Diane was likely counting on, he isn’t confident in having a black woman he’s less “comfortable” with on his cases. I don’t know if Diane was going for the racial element here, but... if you’re really concerned about continuity, you don’t have this meeting without having Madeline ready to jump in and show she’s read up on the client. I’m sure it’s possible that Diane meant nothing in giving this client only Madeline’s name, title, gender, and race to go off of, but is that likely?  

She hands another (white, male) client off to Julius, whom she describes as a “very competent lawyer.” What an introduction. She says she’s not retiring and the firm “just wants to let some other people step forward into a name partner position.” Diane knows how to sell clients on changes they won’t like. She knows this isn’t how you do it.  

That phrase, “comfortable with you” is doing a lot of work, no? Both clients so far have said it, and while it might not be racially coded... it’s racially coded.  

“Who should we call about it?” the clients ask. Diane can barely keep herself from smiling.

They call David Lee, immediately. He takes the call in the middle of a meeting, while someone else is talking—he is David Lee, after all.

The information on the screen in David’s meeting is quite interesting. It’s about STRL’s plans for RL. Here’s how the firm is described: “RL is a high-end mid-sized Chicago law firm that can consolidate its specialized brand within the American POC community and expand its national and global brand with STR Laure.” Soooo... yeah. For the corporate overloards, RL needs it to be just black enough that it appears like a black firm, but they care more about appearances and branding than anything of substance. (Notice how it says “POC” and not black? Notice how there’s this mention of national and global presence that doesn’t seem to be on the RL partners’ mind?)  

There’s an area called room for growth, listing top clients—entertainment law, fracking, the DNC, and civil cases against CPD. Interestingly, two of these are Liz’s clients (entertainment and DNC), one is Adrian’s (civil cases against CPD), and only fracking is Diane’s... so maybe I didn’t give Liz enough credit earlier.  

There’s also a plan of action that includes partners working with STRL and the 15-20% layoffs we already know about. I don’t think this text is meant to include any new info, but I assume one of the writers had a hand in writing it and it’s a good way of confirming things that had been subtext.

Wackner’s reality show looks... well, like his court, because his court always looked like a reality show. Cutting together the most out-there moments (audience reaction cards, Wackner singing “Come on defense!”, Wackner renaming himself Judge Shmuley for a day) makes Wackner look pretty bad.

Hey Liz, I thought you figured out how to silence your notifications for Dawnk permanently. (It’s not all high-stakes controversy over on the “R&L General” channel—the anon animals are now discussing a broken coffee maker.) (Though even this discussion is a bit political! Anon Owl says they bet STR’s coffee machine works, and Anon Dolphin wants to know why they don’t have more coffee maters at RL.)  

There’s also a dance party—which Marissa participates in—in the footage of Wackner.  

Hey, wouldn’t Marissa have reported the cameras to Diane and Liz? I feel like she’d know they’d want to know.  

Wackner ends up on the stand to offer context for the strange-looking clips. In a smart move, Liz offers to just let Judge Farley ask questions—she knows that’s what Farley is really after.

Unsurprisingly, Wackner’s context makes his outrageous practices seem much more reasonable. There’s a scoreboard to keep lawyers aware of where they’re standing so they can gauge instead of guess at Wackner’s thought process. Shmuley is to honor a recently deceased relative. The costumes are to prevent bias and cut down entitlement.  

Plaintiff’s counsel argues that Wackner is biased and the case continues even though Wackner’s (mostly) won over Farley.  

The case next turns to something about copyright law that sounds downright silly—the point is to underline that Wackner’s court makes more sense than real court on some things. It makes more common sense and it’s less racist.  

Del gets called into court. It’s interesting how these scenes are blocked together rather than spread out. The same is true of Diane’s scenes—after credits, we have Diane and Liz at the bar, Diane at home, Diane talking to RBG, Diane making moves, and then David Lee becoming aware of the situation. Then we have several consecutive court scenes (all of which feel like they have natural break points) of Wackner stuff. If I had to guess, I would guess that it’s to keep the momentum going. The Diane stuff plays better when it feels like a continuous chain rather than a subplot.  

(The only thing that suffers is that I have no idea why there’s a court scene about copyright law right after the plaintiff argues they have evidence about Wackner’s bias? I probably wouldn’t have even noticed if the scenes had been spread out more.)  

Now Cord’s involvement with Wackner’s court becomes an issue. It’s funny they need a witness to bring up Cord when Cord is SITTING IN THE COURT ROOM.  

Apparently Cord is financing a company that would compete with the plaintiff’s company and this means Wackner is biased. As the next scene will explain, Cord wasn’t even aware of his investment in the rival company, and Wackner certainly wasn’t. But, regardless, it’s going to be challenging to prove that neither Wackner nor Cord knew about the investment, and the opposition is going to go after Cord’s financial records, which no one wants. Liz suggests a continuance, which would give Wackner about a year to keep working on his court before they have to come back to this issue.  

Wackner HATES the idea of delays and is all, THIS IS WHY I HAVE MY OWN COURT and again, he isn’t wrong.  

David Lee needs to see Liz, now. Liz and Diane meet in David Lee’s office and stare at their phones. Diane says she has no idea what the meeting is about, even though she basically set up the meeting herself.  

“What the fuck is going on?” David Lee says. Diane feigns surprise and asks for more specifics. David Lee reveals that four top clients have called with issues about their representation shifting.  

Liz knows what’s going on and aggressively says, “Diane, thoughts?” “Nothing from me. I met with my clients. I just told them of a restructuring that I was being told about,” Diane says like it’s no big deal. Liz and Diane both know that Diane forced this meeting.

“Is this a power play on your part?” Liz asks Diane. “No, it’s just updating my clients,” Diane says for David Lee’s benefit or commitment to the bit or something. It is definitely a power play, and a nearly unforgivable one done to an ally.  

“David, Diane was told about frustration at the partner level about a white woman being a name partner in a black firm. And apparently, this is her response,” Liz explains. “I just told our clients what was going on,” Diane defends. David Lee doesn’t really care about what happened: he cares about one thing, and that thing is money.  

“Diane’s a fucking name partner until STR Laurie says she’s not. No one decides until I decide. Now stick your race war back in its bottle,” David Lee says. I mean, basically, yeah, that’s what happens when you merge with a huge firm that only cares about profit.  

I like that this ends up coming back to STRL. You can’t really have a conversation about RL’s identity without also acknowledging that RL is not independently owned. Sure, STRL will care at some point if RL loses its clout with the black community—but like most companies, they care about guaranteed loss of profit and the short term more than long-term what-ifs. It may sound cynical, but if Madeline and all of the other partners quit, STRL would simply put all their effort into keeping Liz or even just the Reddick name and would then hire black lawyers who think more like Julius than Madeline to keep the reputation. STRL does not give a shit about helping anyone, and that’s what Diane counts on.  

I do not believe the version of RL that Madeline wants can exist when they’re under STRL’s control. I believe the version Diane wants (not really a black firm) can, and I believe the version Liz seems to want (one that’s mostly black and occasionally social justice focused) can, but this issue won’t go away until STRL does.  

Sure, Diane, keep telling yourself you’re fighting the good fight out here.  

(Perhaps “The Good Fight” is a more ironic and fraught title than it originally seemed.)  

“That was a mistake. I am on your side, and you don’t even realize it,” Liz tells Diane afterwards. Interesting that Liz says “I am” and not “I was.” I would love to know what Liz really thinks about this situation and hope we get more from her POV next week. I think Liz wants to run a black firm, but I also think she wants to run a successful firm and likes working with Diane. Liz is on Diane’s side about as much as she can be while still advocating for Diane to step down.  

Pissing off Liz is a very interesting move for Diane here, too. Diane wants to fight the one person who is on her side for control of a firm that doesn’t want her there, and she’s convinced herself this is the smart move! Kind of wild. What does Diane think the day to day will look like? I think I said this above, but in forcing this war, Diane is all but guaranteeing that if she wins, RL will only be a black firm in that STRL will say it���s one to make more money.

Julius and Diane chat next. Julius says he wants to start his own firm—with Diane. Her only reaction is laughter, but, like, this is probably happening. I’m not sure why she laughs. It’s not quite a case of unfortunate timing (Diane could’ve done this before she blew things up, and it’s not quite too late for Diane to commit to leaving and smooth things over with Liz), so maybe it’s just a “well, this sounds familiar!” laugh.  

(If you think of Previously On as 5x00 instead of 5x01, that would make this episode 5x05, which would make this a Hitting the Fan callback. I can also do mental gymnastics!)  

The episode could end there, but it doesn’t. We’ve still got a Wackner plot to resolve. Cord has some people beat up the plaintiff as a way of enforcing Wackner’s verdict and getting the real court case to go away. Marissa picks up on what’s happened faster than Wackner does, unless Wackner just doesn’t care.  

It’s subtle, but throughout this episode, there’s a little bit of a trend towards Marissa becoming more skeptical of Wackner. She tries to keep him under control in court, tries to reason with him about the continuance, and in this scene, she just looks entirely displeased and alarmed every time she’s on camera.  

We get another scene with RBG. “It’s different for me than it was for you,” Diane says. She notes that unlike RBG, she herself is up against another “dominated culture.” This other dominated culture is “black lawyers.” (I’m sorry, I just find the way she says “black lawyers” funny, partially because she says “lawyers” instead of people and partially because Diane seems insistent on only occasionally remembering that Liz is both black and female.)  

I can’t tell if this scene was originally intended to close the episode or not. The blocks of scenes, the way the episode seems like it should’ve ended with Julius’s laugh but instead has three more scenes (guy getting beat up, Wackner’s court, this one), and the fact the Kings said this episode had to be almost totally rethought because both Christine and Audra had concerns about the original script all suggest to me that maybe some of the scenes in this episode got shuffled around to keep momentum and hit the right notes at the right time.  

Diane acknowledges that RBG could’ve stepped down and we wouldn’t have a conservative majority on the court now if she had. RBG insists that she wouldn’t have stepped aside even if Obama had guaranteed that her replacement would be black. She says it’s because she only knows what she can do—not what others would do. And “what you know is always better than what might happen.”  

Even if this was originally supposed to happen earlier (Diane saying she doesn’t know what to do makes me feel like it way), I like that we get to see it’s still weighing on Diane after the fact.  

(Also, I have seen some comments about, for lack of a better phrase, the girl power energy of these Diane and RBG scenes. No! These scenes aren’t a tribute to RBG! She’s in these scenes because she didn’t step down and can thus help Diane excuse her own actions! These scenes aren’t exactly anti-RBG, but they are certainly critical of some of her choices!)  

The topic shifts to Diane and Kurt’s relationship (another reason to put this somewhere other than the main part of the episode; this would slow down the momentum of the middle part of the episode) and its similarity to RBG’s friendship with Scalia.  

Tbh, I don’t think a friendship and a marriage are all that similar on this front and I’d be curious to see Diane think about RBG/Scalia in the context of her potential partnership with Julius rather than her marriage.

RBG basically tells Diane to stay with Kurt. Diane thanks her, and then, back in reality, tells Kurt to take the NRA job so he’ll be happy—and then she’ll just sue him. Okay, that feels like an episode ending, so I am REALLY curious about all the re-writing and re-structuring that happened in this episode and what did/didn’t get touched. I can’t make up my mind about what feels out of place.

So we start out with Diane feeling like it might be the right thing to explore whether or not it still makes sense for her to be with Kurt, a suspected insurrectionist and future NRA employee, and Diane feeling like she wants to help her friends and partners at her mostly black firm do good in the world. And we end with Diane doubling down on her relationship with Kurt, giving her blessing for the NRA job, and fucking over her colleagues because she wants to keep her own power. Dark! I love it.  

This episode does this all without making Diane entirely unsympathetic, which is astounding. While I think Diane knowingly makes choices that further her self-interest over the values she (claims to?) hold and I am definitely NOT Team Diane on her decisions in this episode, this episode could easily have been less interesting and complex. It’s understandable that Diane would not want to step aside from a firm she’s helped build—who would? It’s understandable that Diane might not feel the passion for a black firm the way she does for a female firm. It’s understandable that Diane might not want to blow up her marriage, despite her political differences from Kurt. This episode allows Diane to be just sympathetic enough she never becomes a flat villain, but never sympathetic enough that someone could mistake this episode for one that shows Diane as a morally pure hero. Personally, I love that in a TV show. That’s the exact kind of writing that made me love Alicia Florrick enough that I still spend a considerable amount of time thinking about her character arc even though TGW ended half a decade ago. It’s what’s been missing from a lot of TGF episodes for me, and why I’ve said that TGF seems like a show more about theme than character. It’s why I’ve written—oh god, TEN THOUSAND words—about this episode.  

I have no clue what’s going to happen next, but I hope it includes more character-driven drama (ideally with a lot of good material for Liz) and not a lot of firm-jumping shenanigans.  

[vigilantetendencies]

Not Selfish

Author’s Note; This addition to the story took me a loooong time to try and work out the plot. I hope this does the story justice! Feedback is always appreciated.

Characters: Enzo “Nighthawk” Ricci, Alan Harper, Storm Vane

Warnings: Hinted spice, swears, etc.

The stacks of information never seemed to end, not that Alan was complaining. The steady stream of corrupt behavior to expose meant that Alan had a steady income as well- for the first time in a long time. He didn't dare to stop working, hardly able to enjoy the fruits of his labor while he was churning out articles. He would enter the office early in the day and leave late at night, bags under his eyes and sunlight gone before he’d even gotten to see it.

“Hey, Alan!” He paused as he exited the building, glancing over at one of the newscasters (and an old friend) Storm, waiting by a car. “Hey man, you look like you could use a drink. Me and the group from meteorology are going out for a few rounds on the big guy. You should come with!” Alan saw a wide smile plastered on Storm’s face, unable to help his own face from breaking out into a grin.

“Yeah, that sounds nice.” He followed Storm to one of the cars they were taking and slid into a seat, feeling slightly out of place but...free drinks sounded great.

It wasn’t long before he was tipsy and laughing at a dumb joke one of the others had made, cheeks red and soul light. When was the last time he felt so...at peace? Certainly it had been long before that ass hole Ricci had come around. He gave in to the pressure of shots, one of the small glasses in front of him before he could really object. No sense in wasting it, right? He and the others downed their respective shots and he watched the others’ faces contort in agony.

“This shit burns!”

“Harper didn’t even bat an eye, what a god!” He laughed along with them, stopping only to look at his phone when it buzzed in his pocket.

[Unknown Number: Too busy partying to call?]

He had a feeling he knew who it was.

“I need to take this,” He told the others, words slurred slightly as he got up from the table.

“C’monnnn,” one of the girls whined. “All you do is work, Alan!”

“It’ll just be a minute, promise.” He left the room, to find a secluded, private one in the back.

“I’ll go make sure he isn’t too long,” Storm told them, winking at the girl. “Someone’s gotta keep him in check, you know.” He followed Alan, rounding the corner as he dialed something into his phone. “Hey.”

Alan looked at him like a deer in the headlights, not having made the call yet.

“We came out for drinks, put it away, Alan.” Storm grabbed his phone, towering over him.

“I didn’t mean to make you guys upset, it’s just-” It’s just what? Enzo “Nighthawk” Ricci, the villain that owned the town? That was going to go over well.

“Is it your boyfriend?”

Alan’s heart nearly stopped.

“My-What? I don’t have a boyfriend,” He insisted, puzzled.

“I guess I wouldn’t know that because you’ve had your nose constantly in your work lately,” Storm stated, almost with...jealousy? “Thought you had some love bites all over your neck a few weeks ago. Must have been mistaken.”

The way he said that sure didn’t sound like a mild observation. It sounded like an accusation.

“I had a run in with a lead. Didn’t like me being there, they threw me around a bit-” Alan’s phone buzzed in Storm’s hand.

[Unknown Number: I’m coming to find you if you don’t call soon.]

“Hey, don’t read my texts,” Alan snapped, reaching for his phone and stumbling into Storm. Storm only held the phone higher, eyes narrowed as he held up his drunk companion. Briefly Alan noted that Storm was not at all as drunk as he had seemed in the bar area- and Alan was...hardly able to keep himself upright, let alone get his phone back.

“Not a boyfriend, huh? Girlfriend? One night stand?” Storm continued to glare down at Alan who was having a hard time understanding the line of questions. “A few weeks ago I was the only person worth all of this dedication. You and I went out for drinks all the time, we worked on segments and articles together… And I don’t like losing you to someone else.”

“Losing...me?” There was movement- He was moving- Pushed into one of the booths in the dimly lit back room. He blinked up at Storm who was already halfway over him, knee between his legs.

“I don’t know who’s coming to find you but I hope they like the show.” 

His phone was forgotten, Storm shoving him down and jamming his tongue into his mouth. Too reminiscent of Ricci, yet there was a gentleness behind Storm’s actions- Actual consideration. And even if this had been a totally unwarranted ordeal in the beginning the alcohol was clouding Alan’s judgement and he was moaning into the kiss. His arms wrapped around Storm’s shoulders as he arched upward, pressing his groin to Storm’s in need---

"I'd hate to interrupt, but I need the reporter that’s currently grinding on you,” a low and all too familiar voice demanded, jarring Alan out of his haze. He pushed Storm away, the man only sitting back, still straddling Alan whose eyes were wide as he looked past him at none other than Enzo.

The large man strode over and easily plucked Storm off of Alan, throwing the reporter over his shoulder. "Actually...I didn't hate that at all. Keep your hands on your own property, kid."

Storm watched as Enzo sauntered right back out the way he entered, Alan lifting his head for his bleary eyes to meet his gaze.

"You didn't fucking buy me," Alan yelled in irritation, tearing away from Storm's eyes.

"No, you gave yourself to me willingly," Enzo snapped back, then loud enough for Storm to hear he added, "Or was you begging me to fuck you just tactile self preservation?"

Storm felt anger swirl in his gut as he watched the two exit the bar, mood sour as he came back to the table.

"Hey, where's Alan?"

"He's looking into a lead," Storm lied.

---

Alan made a pained noise as he was quite literally thrown into Enzo's car, sprawled out in the back seat.

"Do you mind?" Alan spat, scrambling to sit up while Enzo slid in beside him. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Kidnapping you. And what were you doing?" Enzo was calm, just as he was last time. He hardly even spared Alan a glance, pressing a cigarette to his lips.

"I was out getting drinks-"

"Ah, is that what that was?" Alan floundered.

"That- that wasn't supposed to happen," he confessed awkwardly. "Why does it matter to you-?” He could see Enzo looking at him out of the corner of his eye and he swallowed hard. He was in for a world of hurt, wasn’t he?

One car ride and one henchmen-led walk later Alan was shoved into the massive chair behind Enzo’s desk, gripping the armrests to try and correct the way he landed.

“Where is your place?” Enzo towered over him, looking down at him like he was nothing. “Where is your place, Alan Harper?”

He was towering over him, asking him questions they both knew the answers to.

“Beneath you,” Alan answered finally, his prior lesson from Enzo not forgotten.

“Who owns you?”

“You do.” Enzo’s glower worsened. “You do, Enzo. I belong to you.”

“Then what was that?” Each word was said with such conviction, demanding a suitable answer.

Alan opened his mouth to respond and closed it, the alcohol long worn off and mind dull. He didn’t have any funny quips.

“Dumb. It was dumb.” Truth be told, he didn’t think that Enzo was ever going to come find him again, but that didn’t play into what happened. He couldn’t help that Storm was a close and trusted friend, though it was his own fault for drinking enough to stop caring about what he was doing and where. As a reporter he knew that appearances were everything.

“And what punishment do you think that deserves?”

He had no response, cowering back in the chair.

“Or, do you think that your friend deserves to be punished for taking advantage of you like that?”

“No! I drank too much, I let myself get carried away, that isn’t his fault-!”

Enzo bent down to meet Alan’s gaze finally, emotionless as he looked his little reporter over.

“I value you for your willingness to tell the truth, Alan Harper. I let you live because you’re witty and I found you again because you’re cute. But if you lie to me I won’t hesitate to put a bullet in your head.” He grabbed Alan’s chin, eyes harder than before. “You wanted him to fuck you, didn’t you?” Alan felt a cold sweat break out over his body; this question was a death sentence. But as usual he prided himself on being blunt and honest.

“Yes,” he answered truthfully and Enzo let go of him roughly, turning and heading to the door of the office. “Wait!” Alan rushed to get out of the chair, running after Enzo with the intention of catching him- stopping him- but his henchmen grabbed Alan’s arms, holding him back. “Where are you going!?” The henchmen began to drag Alan away as Enzo exited the building all together.

It felt like a thousand eternities that Alan was stuck in the same bedroom as last time he was here, pacing from wall to wall until someone came to release him.

“Dinner is ready,” the woman told him, making him sputter.

“I’ve been waiting for dinner? Dinner!? That’s it!?” She said nothing, gesturing for Alan to follow her down the hall. He did so, knowing full well that not complying could mean a whole lot worse than...last time.

He entered the dining room and stopped dead, eyes wide as he found Enzo sitting across from Storm.

“Sit,” Enzo instructed without looking at him, pulling the chair directly next to himself out. “I’m not in the mood for jokes,” he added before Alan could even open his mouth. Alan sat down, keeping his eyes on the table as food was set in front of him.

“I appreciate the fancy food and all of that, but what’s the deal?” Storm asked, crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair. “I’m not stupid, you brought me here because you’re mad that I was trying to get in his pants. You didn’t blackmail me into coming here to ask me what my favorite color is. Is this a hit?”

“That wouldn’t make Alan here very happy.” Both Alan and Storm looked at Enzo in surprise. “I don’t suppose paying you off will work?”

“Paying him off-?” Alan repeated. “Paying him off for what!?”

“Not a chance,” Storm responded immediately, as if there was some prior conversation that Alan hadn’t been aware of. The two other men were having an intense stare down, and Alan was not sure he even cared to try and understand at this point. He opted instead to eat, avoiding looking at either one of them. He was sure there were some strong glares before the two of them also began to eat, making for the most awkward yet astounding dinner that Alan had ever had the pleasure to take part in.

The end was near, he hoped, as their plates were cleared and Enzo leaned forward onto the table.

“I’m not giving you permission to take him away,” Enzo stated boldly. “But I’m not a selfish man.” That last statement made Alan’s stomach flip. What was it supposed to mean-?

“I tend to believe I’m not selfish, either,” Storm added, and Alan felt those hazy eyes on him. “And I know that he isn’t exactly hard to convince.”

Wait-

Alan looked up.

“Oh, I’m aware,” Enzo agreed. “Then I think we have understanding.” Suddenly Storm was at Alan’s side, pushing his chair back.

“I think we do.” It felt like Alan had been thrown to the wolves, hungry eyes on him as he looked up at Storm then Enzo.

Questions rose to his mind but he found them drowned out when Storm grabbed the front of his shirt, pulling him into a rough kiss as Enzo sat back, sipping on whiskey as he watched Storm dominate the kiss, Alan whimpering at the force of it. 

Alan reacted to the means which Enzo used against him- reacted to being owned, controlled, and utterly helpless. It was interesting to see how he reacted to Storm, already so pent up yet so obedient still to Enzo as he pulled away when Storm broke the kiss to breathe, looking at Enzo as if to gauge what his punishment would be.

"Don't worry, I'll take my turn after."

And that was a promise.

Thanks for reading! Again, I’m open to requests and continuations of everything. If I’ve told you I’ll continue something then don’t you worry, I’ll get to it soon! I struggled a little today to keep up with what I wanted to produce and I intended to work on so much more than this.

If you’re interested in catching up with my other stories I have a master list here.

If you’re feeling generous you can Buy Me a Coffee; I’d be so grateful, but there is absolutely no pressure. My content and my characters are free to enjoy! 

Do you have a request you want filled? Want a prompt answered? Want a snippet? I’m open to all requests assuming they follow the general idea of “Bad guy vs good guy.” 

[thetimelordbatgirl]

I feel like MCU Stans/Fans are getting more toxic by the day. Seriously MCU Spider-Man fans won't let people have there own opinions. All MCU Movies have become same-ey and generic. I mean Spider-Man Far From Home was lazy, uninspired, and ruined my favorite Villain (Mysterio) and turned him into Drone Man basically.

Then Ant Man and the Wasp has to be the worst Movie I've ever watched due to hoe unremarkable it was, felt like generic MCU movie and the literal plot is get the Lab????

Then we have the recent No Way Home and so far it looks like Nostalgia Bait and cringe jokes. Seriously who thought these jokes were funny. We got the same writers from Antman and the Wasp and Spider-Man Far From Home. This will probably be generic and Nostalgia bait.

I watched Spider-Man 2 when I was kid and watched Spider-Man and both those were such grchemistry.

I didn't watch Spider-Man 3 until recently in 2018 because I was scared of venom as a kid. Amazing Spider-Man for all its problems was enjoyable and Amazing Spider-Man 2 I unironically enjoyed even though it has a dumb plot. Honestly Gwen from Amazing Spider-Man is probably the best Live-Action Spider-Man love interest and that's probably because of Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone's chemestry.

I already know Disney will ruin Spider-Man just like they did to Star Wars (Though I wasn't that invested in Star Wars so this will sting even more)

Sorry for the long rant.

Its okay sdddde I understanding needing to rant about the MCU, cause ironically, answer under read more:

Honestly, I avoid going in the main MCU tags unless I feel like going in them, since I fear MCU stans fully, given how while some of them can be pretty chill and some even are critical of the MCU, they pretty much drowned out by the toxic MCU stans....though I feel like toxic MCU stans gather more off Tumblr like most fandom's toxic stans, aka on Twitter and stuff.

And yeah, MCU Spidey isn't really my favorite take on Spiderman. If I was to rank the takes on Spiderman while under Disney, I would honestly rank him pretty low, as out of the three takes on him so far on Spiderman, MCU and 2017 Spiderman fall low while ironically, Ultimate Spiderman show's Spidey is pretty accurate in areas to what he's meant to be, to the point there was an episode dedicated to why he using Iron Man armor is basically bad.

Which is ironic, given MCU spiderman in comparison is basically Iron Man JR, to the point his MCU only solo villains have been connected to Iron Man (Tony fucked over one's job while then stealing the ideas of another) and both times, Peter had to clean up Tony's mess and both times....he never stopped admiring Tony, not even when Mysterio revealed Tony stole his idea. Like ironically, Mysterio is the one villain who actually affected Peter's life beyond one film, aka the identity reveal plot which....is honestly stupid to go into for Spiderman's third solo film, but it's still a bad take on Mysterio, given its again, changing him so he's caused by TONY's wtf move and....still connecting him to Peter somehow. And like you said, No Way Home is basically Nostalgia Bait, as all the villains aren't even connected to MCU Peter, they from actually good spiderman films and two of them have already been changed to have some form of Tony tech (Doc Ock absorbing Peter's iron man suit so his arms get red bits while Electro appears to now have an arc reactor) and the only appeal to this movie is a, the villains and b, the uh, ending scene off Venom Let There Be Carnage and c, the possibility of the two good Spiderman's appearing....and honestly, Disney's ruined any impact the whole Michelle falls scene with it being in ALL trailers and TV promos now, and like, if they trying to appear like Gwen Stacy....they should probably know even Marvel nowadays avoids the Gwen Stacy thing, given it uh, falls into fridging woman for men's angst or in Michelle's case, endangering a girl for men's angst.

I can't really comment on Ant Man And The Wasp, as can't say I keep up with them in comics, but like, I don't think I minded the film much....but that's just cause I honestly enjoyed Ghost's take here and honestly only disliked the ending, aka the stupid need to tie it into Infinity War/Endgame, as I dislike both of those films and therefore, seeing that ending just made me wanna die.

And honestly, I do think the love interests over the Spiderman films have been fine, and kinda find it funny not many picked up MJ in the OG films fell like Michelle did and went straight for Gwen Stacy falls comparisons, but when it comes to MCU, while Michelle and Peter have chemistry so far in the trailers, we already know its going to be just, mostly Peter having a plot thing while Michelle kinda just doesn't, like closest we know of Michelle's home life is stuff she alluded to in Far From Home, aka her and her mom not having seen her dad for years and such, but Homecoming according to a interview, did have a deleted scene:

Like....Michelle only has tell in terms of alluding to her home life, unless No Way Home finally fixes it, meaning she stands out as the love interest with not much going on outside of Peter, which is bad compared to MJ from OG trilogy, whose shown to have a shitty dad and has goals and such and pursues them throughout the films, while Gwen's family was apart of Amazing's plots, aka her dad, and again, she's shown doing things outside of Spiderman, which like....if MCU is meant to be better, how does this look for Michelle?

And going back to IW/Endgame, Far From Home is just another victim of bringing up the Snap and crap CONSTANTLY, to the point....the whole class was a victim of the snap, cause by snapping Peter, Endgame would have implied that Peter by Far From Home time, would be in a different class if his class moved on....so of course, they snapped the whole class in response bar one but apparently that's cause the actress didn't come back, so...

Ironically like Star Wars under Disney, MCU spiderman could have been good, as Tom as Spiderman could have been good, let alone having the talent of Zendaya and such, but instead....we got Iron Man Jr straight from Civil War to present, and given hes getting THREE MORE FILMS, its only going to get more bad.

[blkgirlcafe]

Town Whore

Been sitting in my Google Docs for over a year, so why not post it. Pure smut, no plot

Chris Evans x Liz x Henry Cavill

Word Count: 1.7k 

Tw: Sex, Unprotected sex, roleplay, facials, dirty talk, degrading, spilled water lol. 

When they say being wine drunk was a different type of drunk, she agreed. Wine made Liz feel light, floaty with a girly giggle. She moved around her home with ease, shutting windows and locking doors, ready to take the rest of her bottle to bed. 

After securing everything, Liz went upstairs, finding a comfy tee to sleep in. Laid comfortably in bed, she scrolled Instagram, giggling quietly at the funny videos she found. 

Liz barely registered the first bump, her ears strained to hear the 2nd bump, the 3rd bump saw her turn her phone down. 

She decided to check downstairs and get some water. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, so she grabbed her water. 

Standing at the base of the stairs she gave the space one more look over when she saw them. The glass dropped, shattering at her feet.

“Scream and I’ll kill you.” The voice said, a knife suddenly at her throat. The cold water seeped through her toes as she shook with fear. 

“It’s okay baby, I won’t let him hurt you...yet.”

The two laughed at the joke and Liz whimpered. 

“Now take us to your room sweetheart.” 

One of the guys lifted her, stepping over the glass before putting her down. On shaky legs she led them upstairs and to the master bedroom. She paused at the door, knowing that walking in there meant something bad. 

“Don’t have all day sweetheart.” Someone pinched her ass before pushing her into the room. 

“We may not have all day but we do have all night. Why don’t you take off that shirt baby, show Daddy that pretty body.”

Liz bit her bottom lip, pulling the hem of the shirt down farther. 

“Please...Don't.” Liz couldn’t get it out. 

“He may be a man of patience but I am not, take it off or I’ll cut it off.” The same knife that was once pressed up against her neck, trailed lazily from the neckline of the shirt down. 

A silent tear fell as she yanked the shirt over her head. She stood before the two men, naked. 

Arms crisscrossing to cover her mound. 

“No need to be shy pretty girl, get on the bed, on your knees.”

“Fuck, going to have so much fun with her.” He palmed himself as he watched her bend over, getting a glorious view of her pretty little cunt. 

Liz watched the men as they undressed, it was clear they took care of themselves. Both over 6 feet tall, one slightly taller. 

The shorter one, had short brown hair, a tattoo over his heart, light chest hair that started at his belly button. His dick pointed straight out, long, already hard and leaking precum. 

The taller one sported dark brown curls, one particular curl unruly unlike the rest. He had thick arms that were covered in fur like his chest. He gave his thick cock a few pumps before walking over to her. He was the harsher one of the two, holding her chin in a vice grip. 

“Be a good girl for us and we won’t hurt you, understand?” His deep voice had an accent, British she thought. But she couldn’t be sure, she was drunk and stuff was a little hazy. She shook her head to acknowledge him, but received a sharp slap for it. 

“I said do you understand.”

“Yes.” Liz said weakly. 

“Good girl.” The shorter one walked over, smoothing his hand over the heated skin of the slap. 

“Open.” The gruff one said. Liz parted her lips as his tip invaded her mouth. The salty taste of his skin overtook her. He kept pushing until he felt the back of her throat, pausing to enjoy the sounds she was making. Something between a choke and moan got lost in her throat. She looked up at him with big doe watery eyes, pleading with him to stop. He pulled out, a trail of spit between her lips and his cock. 

“So good.” He cooed as if she was a dumb. 

He pushed back in setting a harsh pace, his dick hitting the back of her throat, his balls slamming on to her wet skin. 

Tears mixed with spit and Precum as he pulled out, “Fuck try her mouth.” 

Liz didn’t like being talked about like an object, like she wasn’t here. She didn’t like these men deciding to come into her home and use her like this. 

The shorter stepped up, he gently wiped the tears from her eyes, “shhhs, it’s going to be okay babygirl.” 

He pushed into her mouth softly, letting her set the pace. He talked softly to her, “you feel so good baby, you know that.” 

“You shouldn’t be in this big house alone, need someone to take care of you.”

“If you had a man in the house this wouldn’t happen.”

His thrust slowly built up, hand on the back of her head. 

Liz choked on a scream when she felt a large hand find her clit. The other guy used two fingers to rub her clit in small circles. Her wetness spread between her lips. 

 “Well will you look at this Chris, this little pussy is wet.” 

A thick finger was pushed past her lips, stroking her walls in slow motion. Liz's eyes fluttered closed and she got mad at herself for enjoying it. 

Her hips moved on their own, pushing back, taking him knuckles deep. 

“Little whore is turned on.” The one that was called Chris said. 

“Let me open her up a little, get her on her back.” 

You were easily flipped over, on your back between these two men. 

“Please I don’t want to do this.” She pleaded. 

Chris grabbed her by her throat, “We didnt fucking ask, did we Henry?”

“Sure didn’t.”

“So shut the fuck up, and take what we give you, be a good girl and we will let you cum.”  He grinned pushing his long cock back between her lips. 

Liz swallowed around him when she felt the other guy lick her clit. What started as little licks turned into him flattening his tongue and taking low licks from top to bottom. His tongue darting in and out of her dripping hole before licking around her clit. 

Liz squirmed and moaned. 

“Fuck Henry I don’t know what you are doing but keep doing it, her mouth is oh...” a strangled cry left his mouth as he cum. Flooding Liz's mouth with his salty essence. He slowly pulled between her lips. 

“Swallow like a good girl.” She did, looking away in shame. Chris grabbed her chin, pulling her in for a kiss that surprised her, his tongue playing in her mouth, no doubt tasing himself. 

Henry pulled away and she whimpered. 

“Needy little slut, I can’t wait to use that pussy.” 

She tried to wiggle away as he pressed his length against her holle, toying with her. Henry pushed the head in before pulling it out and resting it against her wetness. 

“Say please babygirl and I’ll fuck you, that little pussy wants me inside, right honey? 

His tone was patronizing, mocking, but Liz couldn’t deny she wanted him. 

“Please.” She mumbled against the bed. 

“Att aht...” Henry grabbed her hair pulling her neck up, “louder!” 

“Please fuck me!” She screamed out, Henry slamming into her. Liz gasped for air as Henry fucked her into the mattress, his thick dick stretching her walls. 

“Little whore, we’ve seen you around town. Wearing those little clothes, showing off your body. We knew you lived alone,  no respecting man would let his woman out like that.” He grunted with each pump. 

Chris watched her fall apart as he stroked his dick back to life. 

He bent so he was eye to eye with her, “Look at you honey, getting fucked by two men, such a slut.” 

“What would your family and friends think if we knocked you up.”

“Please no, no I’m not on birth control.”

“Beg me to cum in that mouth of yours.” 

Henry strokes slowed down, “beg stupid girl.”

“Please cum in my mouth, anywhere but inside me.” Liz cried out.

“Good girl.” Henry quickly dismounted her, jerking off over her face. 

Warm, thick cum sprayed her lower face, thick ropes painted her mouth and chin.

“My turn.” 

Henry sagged against the headboard watching Chris slide between her legs. 

Eyes red and wet, face covered in cooling cum, Liz moaned as he pushed into her sore walls. Chris pulled her legs over his shoulder, behind her legs until she was almost folded in half. 

“Fuck man this pussy feels...” he moaned as he bottom out. 

“Told you she would be worth it.” Henry grinned from the head of the bed. 

They had talked about this, talking about fucking you, using you as their cunt. 

“Come for me sweetheart.” His thumb found her clit, rubbing it in time with his thrust. 

“Come on, give me that cum baby, you know you want to.” 

Eyes shut in pleasure, a million fireworks went off, toes curled against the sensation, walls slamming down on him. 

“Oh my god...” Liz moaned out, ashamed she had cum that hard. 

“Good girl, now time for me to paint that face.” He quickly changed positions, thighs on either side of her face as he cum on it. 

“Fuck, yesss.” His body jerked as the last few drops painted her lips, her tongue darted out to taste the combined taste of the two men. 

They sat in silence and their breathing returned to normal. 

Henry was the first to get up, he bent over her, “look at me sweetheart, you okay? You did so good.” 

“Thank you.” Liz's voice had a dreamy tone to it. 

“Look at our girl, need to get you washed up so you can sleep.”

Liz looked over at her two boyfriends, not wanting to move, just be cuddled up with them. 

“How about this, a quick wash up and then you can lay down?” 

Henry walked into the bathroom to get a warm soapy rag while Chris went to get her water. 

Liz loved their monthly role play nights, and lucky there are 3 of them to keep the ideas coming.