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#its supposed to be good tonight too!!
softwaring · 26 days
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last nights solar storm was the strongest in 103 years, and the aurora it produced was stunning.. it felt like being in a kaleidoscope 🥹
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spotsupstuff · 9 months
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Only 25% processing power dedicated to sparrows? Thats nothing! *dedicates 87% of my processing power to sparrows*
25% of an Iterator processing power has to be an equivalent to like. three or four NASA centrums combined or smth i do not know processing powers but it has to be insanely much..
n then they make some sort of plans for the night that appeal to Euros Very Much and suddenly all processing power he can spare goes to it for the whole day till the plan happens
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piplupod · 1 month
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praying and hoping and begging for things to get better or at least more tolerable soon because i dont know how many more physical symptoms of stress my body can take
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wabblebees · 10 months
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im like if the most useless boytoy twink was also an incredibly handy butch lesbian
#this post is about me collapsing as soon as i got home from work#where i used a garden hoe i sharpened myself to hack down+tear out a truly impressive thistle 3× my size while 3 of my coworkers watched#swung it overhead like an axe until the centre stalk (almost the size of my wrist) was felled. then hoed around it until the roots came free#& i could grab it with my hands where there werent any thorns. turned around and all 3 of em were lookin at me like 😳😳 lmao#but now im sitting in my bathtub bc i cant stand long enough to shower anymore hdksgsk#knew this morning it was a bad pain day but pushed thru it anyway bc!! there was work to do!! but now im gonna be totally useless for 24hrs#cest la vie i suppose#after the thistle was properly disposed of just kept tilling+weeding+fixin tomato cages in the fields. came home & felt sooo dykey+hot lmfao#was like ''fuck yeah man idk what was up with me this morning im feelin fine now! great even!''#then took my knee braces off to get into the shower & almost busted my ass on the tile when both of em gave out🤦#my shoulders are now reminding me that i Dont Have the muscle mass to use a bigass hoe like anything but a hoe w/out Paying For It later#its a good thing i have the day off tomorrow bc im going to turn into a slug as soon as im done steaming meself like a little dumpling#definitely thinkin about using my pathetic-wet-cat-charm to get someone to bring me food tonight tho... hmm#anyway. wheres that post#''im not a butch but i believe their beliefs''#its my exectution thats lacking lmao. but in any case#mwah. mwah mwah mwah#<-for all the butches out there. ily tysm youre wonderful#and to all the useless boytoy twinks out there: o7 <3#godspeed fellow hopeless fags. ily too. keep doin what yr doin lmao#bee speaks
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boytoydevil · 11 months
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Me when im just trying to do my job and i get stabbed >:(
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themooninfrunami · 10 months
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Crowley is so sza mitski laufey faye webster hozier coded
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Could I PLEASE catch a fuckin break for once? I tried to go get caught up on work tonight and instead my stupid fibro decided my chest, shoulders, arms, hands, and blasted right leg needed to feel a little extra pain tonight. And by extra pain I mean going from maybe a 3 to a 7 or 8 in a matter of a half hour. Can't even hold my fuckin tablet pen and draw a straight line due to the tremors. And cramping. And I can't miss work tomorrow night because I'm broke AF and need the hours. But also we're holding a star party which means I'll be standing around outside for 5hrs and if I'm in this much pain still tomorrow I'm not sure how I'm gonna handle 150+ people.
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todayisafridaynight · 10 months
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Ok but Jiro splurging and getting Ichi a little pocket guide to local bugs ;o; He’d carry it everywhere as a kid and it’d get so bent and dirty but he learns so much. Bringing home bugs to his dad in his lil wire bug trap and rattling off bug facts while some of the girls are screaming for him to take it outside (cute lil Ichi being the one who handles bugs for some of the girls at Shangri-La who are afraid of them)
I’m sorry I dunno why I’m so obsessed with little bug guy Ichiban. Imagine him being young and watching caterpillars grow in class okay ;o; angel!!
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oh so we're all on board with Bug Lover Ichi then maybe democracy does exist
#snap chats#i leave for a walk and casually comment 'ichi should be a bug wizz' and#pun intended#here come a swarm of asks 😩#i do very much like the idea that jiro gets ichi a bug book for his birthday one year.......... thats so cute i love that...#he bringing that shit everywhere with him i prommy it always gonna be tucked away in his lettermen 😭#and ichi being the Local Bug Remover....... bless his heart... everyone mad at the roaches but hes just :( ? Theyre Friends :)#jewel beetles are MAD pretty i LOVE EM im sure ichi'd love em too..#and I Too consider nancy a sea bug of sorts... its only fitting its only right..#how the fuck a cicada molt in your car tho ☠️☠️ LMAO good luck for things to come i guess#also in review i think i found a cicada /carcass/ instead of a shell- VEEEERY different#considering cicadas often represent rebirth and change and growth... that doesnt tell me good things about my future..#but thats just superstition right :) r :) right <:)#speaking of superstition the moo is Full And Yellow tonight like an expensive wheel of cheese#and tbh as pretty as they are full moons worry me: people can get weird during that time and my mom is no exception#coupled with the fact then when i got home my bro told me my sis- who was supposed to be home today- was sick#veryyyy bad omens ahead for me.....#in any case... i watched the deer king and WMA2 today :)#unrelared to Everything I Just Said LMAO BUT HEY MIGHT AS WELL REPORT IT#LOVED EM but i dont have the tags to talk about them both extensively... just know yall should give em a watch...#or at least Deer King.. that one's much easier to find with subs.... (but WMA2 is def worth the trouble)#ok bye i have work to do i got Another client during my walk ☠️☠️
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steampoweredskeleton · 6 months
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Tomorrow I am going to buy baldurs gate as soon as I've finished work and I am BUZZING WITH EXCITEMENT
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year
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...
#i think. maybe ill go to bed before 8 tonight#bc my brain. i can't deal with it. and im tired#but i should not do that bc i have things i need to do#like. theres an application due the 11th. but fuck it i might not send it bc fucking whats the point#why has it become so impossible to function? i mean. i kno why but its still annoying#and its like so crazy bc i just feel like im curled up on the floor with the broken pieces of my life and nothing terribles even happened#from an outside perspective its perfectly fine and good my insides have just rottef out#like i had to spend most of today plotting an experiment and i feel bad bc im just so. im so worried that looking after yhis thing is going#to hurt. its going to drain away hours of my time. i dont kno how long it take to deal with every single day for 2 weeks#ill have to water it at 7 and 5 and take measurements all day probably and im very worried about the amount of damage thats going to do#when it already feels like i should b careful where i step. and i feel bad bc im prob such a bummer to hang around like im so sullen faced#and i just dont care. like we had to make a decision bc we could do one thing or another and it would b answering 2 diff questions#and my boss was like. well which do u find most interesting. and i just. i dont care im more concern with the amount of psychic damage this#will inflict upon me so i just dont really give a fuck and that makes me so sad bc like at one point this probably would have been fun#and now im just bitter and it hurt and i jusr want to lay down and not get up#and im like how the fuck am i supposed to find a phd position when the enthusiasm for what i do now has completely burned thru me?#like hi yes r u looking for a new student? im dizzy and my life is falling apart even tho everythings my brains just on fire#but ya kno i think id b an asset to your lab! sigh... itll b fine i kno it will bc it has to b#ill visit the school i wanna go to. hopefully not make myself look like too much of an unstable moron and then leave this place#dragg my bleeding soul across the country to shrivel up in a different area code#somethings gotta give but lets hope it waits a couple months ya kno#ugh. im just tired. i should sleep. i didnt sleep enough last night. and i didnt relax on the weekend so ive got that i don't kno what day#it is type of vertigo. but tomorrow will b better. it will bc i dont want it to b worse#unrelated#i just want to study things that made me feel something. y doesn't that have to b so hard?#let me study slime. endless days alone with the green goo
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cyancherub · 2 years
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what if i came up with code names for the guys i have talked to/am talking to and keep u guys updated on all of them 
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kalpasio · 1 year
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DID IT TAKE ME 10 DAYS TO WATCH THE GOLDEN COURTYARD EPISODES? YES. AM I LATE TO THE PARTY? YES, WHATS NEW. AM I MAKING AN ABSURDLY LONG POST ABOUT IT? YES, W H A T S N E W.
here's the play by play
I hate kosma without horns but the fact that he has a poster of Kalpas in his room is making up for it
the absolute cackle I gave when Kevin goes "yeah what part are they responsible for?" and Kalpas is beating the shit out of the dough 😭😭😭😭😭
I would die for griseo
aponia scares the shit outta me
I love Sakura 😭💖
I love vill-v 🧡🧡
why are aponia boobs so big?
I love vill-v 🧡
oh they're making kalpas face away from the camera to hide his fa-- IS HE CARRYING A PLATE OF FIRE??
I would die for this man
NOT THE FACE MASK
do you think Eden knows he has the face mask on
the little bonk Griseo gives kosmas dumpling
aponia really scares me ahahahahahah
100% Kevin went out an bought those
YEAH OF FUCKING COURSE HE DID
SUFFER
why is can so larg?
all the pillows 😭 and vill-v's hat 😭😭
also Kalpas doing The Squat (TM)
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why is he playing on mobile oh my gosh I'm so concerned
kinda sad Rin isn't here 😔
not to be horny on main but vill-v pretty
all the little details they put into the background are so good and I love it
MEI with the 👍👍👍 and Kevin smiling...hhhh I know this man is whipped but like oof
do not let Kevin in the kitchen
they really did pardo dirty huh
THEY DONT EVEN GIVE THE KALPAS SNOWMAN A FACE REVEAL D A M N THEY ARE STINGY
I draw smiley faces like :> so the fact that Griseo painted on just made me so happy lmao
I started episode 2 which was a mistake I'm sorry
KALPAS BEING STRONGER THAN KOSMA AND KEVIN IS GIVING ME LIFE
NOT SU'S TREEEEEE
I am definitely not paused and trying not to cry on the hot spring picture. nope.
NOT THE SNOW
soldering isn't that hard, 100% trust vill-v with that. but uhhh. that hole is a little large to solder...
I love su. and hua too 😭🧡🧡🧡
your honor I think I'm in love with all the flame chasers except Kevin. fuck kevin
t tHe PHOTO ALBUM?!?!!?
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MHY. DO YOU KNOW. HOW MUCH. I WOULD PAY????? like 2 cents because I'm a broke college kid but please I am begging you😭😭😭😭😭😭
Kevin's fucking haunted face lmao if I didn't hate him so much I would be tempted to make this a profile pic lol
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why does Kevin stick his ass out like that?
what is THAT
SU OPENED HIS EYES OH FUCK
oh no poor baby griseo
oop. there she goes
OH NO THERE THE COMICS GO 😭
p pardo?
OH NO PARDO
please do not eat the very very old cup noodles. not only are they definitely expired, Kevin made them. you're going to get food poisoning
why is kalpas sitting in a corner alone 😭😭
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the fucking Squat lmao
is he just staring at a magazine full of pictures of himself? because like I would tok but damn
we are only 6 minutes in oh dear
oh?! Eden finally makes an appearance? what is the deal with her helmet tho
also how is she not freezing with her boobs out like that? I am here to tell you, when it is cold, you cover that shit up
AND HER STOMACH?! EDEN HOW ARE YOU NOT DEAD
didn't they ask you to pick up flour Eden??
Kevin is already thinking of other places to live and he's just moved in lmao
APONIA MAKING A VERY GOOD POINT I TOLD YOU THEY WOULD KILL YOU
kalpas with his face in the floor 😭 su fucking meditating 😭 I am dying
AND THE BOOK ON HIS FACE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH
pardo: I had this really horrible dream!
kalpas: ok, and? I'm fucking tired
the fact that they're all so supportive is gonna make me cry oh my gosh
where are the subtitles oh no
the scar 😭 please just give us the face reveal I am dying
kosmas little horns on his hat lol
"it's just a sunrise" hold on real quick I gotta take a pic for my gf
IN THE DREAM WE WERE HEROES. BUT WE WERE ALSO LOSERS
my friend quotes this to me daily but oh my gosh oooof
I just want them to be happy PLEASE
Griseo asking kosma his wish is 😭😭 she does so much to make him happy and it makes me so sad
THE ACTION FIGURES ME FUCKING TO KOSMA
Eden and Ely kinda gay ngl👀👀
why does Kevin get 3 wishes damn
I DIDNT EVEN NOTICE SAKURA'S EARS OH MY GOSH 🧡🧡
basically. I'm dying. why did you let me do this 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
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viir-tanadhal · 2 years
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thank you munna @thirduncle for tagging me to post a song + 9 images from my camera roll!!!!!
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piplupod · 6 months
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oh i think I'm going to throw myself into a ravine actually
#i need to . do something. idk what. everything is bad#boy i hate the feeling leading up to a meltdown#and then when it never happens u get to just edge on this feeling basically for days until u finally break#tonight was supposed to be so good. I was so set. i had my dinner plan and i was gonna watch aew#and then parents happened and the second spider of the day and i just want to tear all my skin off or something#im. so frustrated. missed all the wrestling. and my dinner is all skewed bc my routine is so fucked now. hate this#this all sounds so trivial and those parts of it are but theres other shit i dont want to mention bc i Can't Think About It rn#i just. god. fuck!!!#idk what to do lmao i am so tired i am so so tired. this is all hell#i am supposed to just let it go and move on but goddamn im upset. but im not allowed to be. supposed to just move on#not productive to be upset. cbt and everything says ur just supposed to let it all go and be fine w everything#change your thoughts :) i am not being abused i am not being fucked over :) i am fine and all i need to do is eat :)#my feelings dont matter and i have no wants :) my needs dont matter past basic survival things and even then those are flexible :)#i just need to try harder bc obviously im not trying hard enough so ignore the body and just push thru :) this is how its supposed to work!!#you got your plans you've been looking forward to for several days fucked over well too bad just move on :)#no being upset because you can just think past it :) you have to control your feelings :)#i just want to go to bed#vent /
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strawchocoberry · 9 months
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‘CAUSE GIRL, YOU EARNED IT
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୨୧ featuring: zhongli, alhaitham, wriothesley, neuvillette, tartaglia x fem reader 
ଘ cw: smut, gangbang, intoxication kink, spanking, edging, pet names, oral sex, nipple play, handcuffs, fingering, choking, praise kink, degradation kink, rough sex, double penetration, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, breeding kink, creampie, dumbification
୨୧ synopsis: guilty of negligence 
ଘ wc: 4.4k
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It was a peaceful night, rain was falling outside, lullying nature into serene sleep. And here you are, fixing your lingerie that was practically nothing more than decoration on yourself. A bit of lipstick and you were done. You took a look at yourself in the mirror, pleased with how utterly gorgeous you looked. You couldn’t wait. It had been so long since you last saw him that you were ready to devour every piece of him the moment he stepped inside your house. You counted the seconds, trying to calm your excited heart, but it was in vain. Before the sound of your doorbell could even fathom to fully reach your ears, you were running to the door, putting on your silk robe to avoid becoming a spectacle for any potential passer-by. 
Five pairs of eyes were looking at you and you could only stand there and stare at them with widened, shocked eyes. They were equally if not more confused than you were. And it finally dawned on you; you had accidentally arranged to meet all of them on the same day, at the same time. Your mouth opened and closed, as you found no words to explain the situation to them. What were you supposed to say, anyway? You stepped aside, letting them come inside to the warmth of your house, feeling bad for letting them spend a few more minutes at the cold of your porch. 
They settled in your living room, averting their curious gazes back at you. You felt your cheeks blushing by this predicament you had bestowed upon yourself over your own carelessness. Their intense gazes that travelled upon your body, taking in every little detail like starved men, had you wrapping your arms around yourself, suddenly being too self-aware of the few garments you were wearing. 
“I-I’ll bring you some h-hot beverages to warm y-yourselves,” you suggested, making haste into the kitchen. 
And as you were panicking, trying to think of ways to deal with the situation at hand, the gentlemen in your living room became acquainted with those they weren’t. Zhongli, Wangsheng Funeral Parlour’s Consultant. Alhaitham, Sumeru’s Akademiya’s Scribe. Neuvillette, Fontaine’s Chief Justice. Wriothesley, Lord of the Fortress of Meropide. Tartaglia, the Eleventh of the Eleven Fatui Harbingers. They didn’t really seem to mind your stalling in the kitchen. On the contrary, the five of them started talking amongst themselves, starting with Neuvillette, who was clearly surprised to meet Tartaglia once more. 
You couldn’t make up what they were talking about, but you could hear their lively chatter. Of course, none of them was mad or angered by the others’ presence. You were just good friends with all of them; good friends that occasionally fucked each other, but that’s just your way to keep your friendship interesting. They were, however, caught off guard by the rest, as were you, yet they seemed to have moved past it. 
You didn’t know what to do. How were you supposed to send them home when they had cleared their schedules for the night just to meet you? I’m so stupid! You mentally cursed at yourself, as you started preparing some tea. Getting them to leave was already a nearly impossible task, let alone now that they seemed to be getting along. You dreaded the thought of going back there. You dreaded the thought of having to explain how all of them showing up at your door tonight was an accident, a careless mistake you made and failed to realise till they had all arrived. 
As the tea was being prepared, you went through your cupboards, taking out various snacks to go along with the tea. You were almost moving like a robot that needed its joints to be greased. You could even hear the faint sound of screeching each move of yours made. It’s going to be alright, you attempted to calm yourself down. They’ll just have some tea and then they’ll leave… Or at least that’s what you wanted to happen. I won’t have to explain how I messed up our meeting schedule tonight… Wishful thoughts that barely managed to help you. 
Soon enough, you returned to the living room, bringing them the tea and snacks. To say that you felt as awkward as one could feel at the moment was an understatement. And yet, the men in your presence paid no attention to it, as they helped themselves with a cup of tea, continuing their conversation. You were just sitting on an armchair, watching them converse as if they had been called to a tea party from the start, not that silly little you had by accident invited them all over. 
“And here I was thinking that this was all just a mistake on your part,” you heard Alhaitham say a little louder in order to catch your attention. 
Pulled out of your thoughts, you turned to look at him, tilting your head in confusion as to what he meant. You noticed his heavier breathing, the way he seemed as if his body was on fire. He appeared calm, but oh that boner of his told another story. A quick look around and you saw the rest of them being in a similar state. Your eyes fell on the chocolate bites among the other snacks. Fuck— 
“Come here.” 
You took a moment to look at Neuvillette. Even in this state of arousal, he spoke in that authoritative voice of his, the one he always uses when commanding order in the courtroom. You gulped and hesitantly walked towards him. With a swift move of his, you found yourself sitting on his lap, the Chief Justice already untying your robe. 
“We all got the impression that perhaps this was just a… Misunderstanding.” He caressed your cheek, looking at you fondly, despite the serious tone of his voice. “Did you perhaps plan this in advance? Bringing us here, then giving us chocolate laced with an aphrodisiac?” 
“Should I perhaps arrest you now, little kitten?” Wriothesley whispered in your ear, biting your earlobe right after. 
“I suggest she receives punishment for her criminal actions.” Tartaglia was now standing in front of you, smirking, as he held a piece of chocolate to your lips. 
“B-But I-I didn’t do it on purpose—” 
“Negligence is still a crime, love.” Neuvillette kissed your cheek. “And even if we were to believe your claims, the evidence works against you.” His hand slipped down your open robe, rubbing your folds. “Wearing such revealing lingerie and getting wet at the mere sight of us being aroused… Tsk tsk tsk.” He shook his head. “You’re as guilty as you can be, love.” 
Tartaglia slipped the chocolate into your mouth, looking at you as you munched on it and swallowed it. He smirked, caressing your chin softly, before crushing his lips on yours, kissing you impatiently, hungrily, desperately. Alhaitham and Zhongli approached you as well, ridding you of the only garments you were wearing, leaving you completely naked under their ravenous gazes. They were trying their best to keep themselves in control and not rip you apart; their eyes betrayed it. 
It didn’t take long for the aphrodisiac to kick in your system nor for the carnal desire to overtake your body. You were lying on Neuvillette’s chest, squirming and moaning and meowing, your eyes rolling to the back of your skull. His left hand was holding your arms behind your back, whilst his right one was tending to your clit, his fingers rubbing your sensitive bud with utmost expertise. Wriothesley was kneeling in-between your legs, holding them open with his strong arms, as he feasted upon your delectable cunt, tasting your arousal and letting out low growls. 
On your left side was Zhongli and on your right was Alhaitham. They were leaving kisses all over your exposed body, massaging your breasts with one hand and pressing you down with the other. Their mouths were tending to your nipples, sucking on them as they watched you writhe in pleasure by all those men paying attention to you. Tartaglia emerged from behind the couch, caressing your cheek and averting your gaze to him. Leaning down, he buried himself in the crook of your neck, kissing and licking and biting you all over. Your body arched at their touch, your moans only urging them further. 
Wriothesley let out a guttural growl, licking every drop of your arousal. He could barely keep your spasming body still, as you moaned out in pure ecstasy from your orgasm. All of them smirked, feeling you convulsing, looking like you’ve just entered heaven. Neuvillette slapped your cunt, earning a whimpering moan from you. 
“Did you like it that much, love?” Neuvillette asked you. 
“Of course she did, right, kitten?” Wriothesley smirked, licking over your cunt. 
“Her moans confirm that, don’t they, dear?” Zhongli kissed your neck. 
“Oh, poor baby, you aren’t tired yet, hm?” Alhaitham cooed in your neck, gently biting down over one of Tartaglia’s bites. 
“Oh no, no! We can’t have you getting tired so early, darling.” Tartaglia kissed your lips. “The fun’s just starting.”
You were lost in your sweet haze for a moment, watching them change their positions. Neuvillette pushed himself up, sitting now on the couch, rather than lying. Alhaitham caught your hands and pulled you forward. Your bare cunt was sitting oh so perfectly on the Chief Justice’s clothed crotch, making him let out a low moan, as your arousal was drenching him. You hissed, looking down at Wriothesley who bit your tit, folding tightly the other in his fist. Alhaitham caught your chin, averting your attention back to the three men standing before you. 
You watched them get undressed, their cocks springing free from the constraints of their pants, hard and desperate for attention. Tartaglia and Zhongli took your hands, placing them on their shafts, moving them along their lengths, before allowing you to continue on your own. Alhaitham stroked his cock, bringing it to your lips. He smirked as you obediently opened your mouth and took him in, your lips wrapping perfectly around his girth, a low groan leaving his lips. 
“That’s it, baby,” Alhaitham moaned, his head falling back. 
“So desperate,” Tartaglia mocked, watching how you eagerly moved your head up and down, taking as much of the Scribe’s cock in your mouth as you could. The Harbinger let out a moanful groan the next moment, as you stroked his cock and used your thumb to smear the tip with his cum. 
“If you wished for all of us, dear, you should have said so sooner,” Zhongli breathed, catching your hair in a nice ponytail. 
The three of them took turns having you please them with either your skilled hands or your warm mouth. First was Alhaitham, who let you suck him off at your own pace, relishing the cute gleam in your eyes as you looked up at him. He mumbled a couple curses under his breath, while he kept telling you how good you looked with his cock in your mouth, how good you made him feel. His whole body tensed, his grip on his waist tightened, as he let out a moan, cumming in your mouth. 
“Good girl,” Alhaitham praised, kissing your lips tenderly, before standing up. 
Zhongli was the one to occupy your mouth next. Even after all the times you’ve had sex with him, your mouth was still not accustomed enough with his girthy cock. You choked on his shaft, tears welling up and falling from your eyes in streams. The former Geo Archon cupped your cheek gently, wiping away your tears with his thumb. He looked at you affectionately, encouraging you to take your time. He groaned and grunted, feeling your tongue swirl over and over again over that one specific vein, having him lose his mind and coming undone. 
“Perfect as always, dear,” Zhongli whispered in your ear. 
And last but definitely not least, it was Tartaglia’s turn. You braced yourself, knowing him all too well to be certain that he wasn’t going to be as gentle as the two before him. He allowed you a moment to tend to him on your own, before kneading your hair in a ponytail and forcing you on him, his cock hitting the back of your throat. New tears welled up in your eyes. You looked up at him, noticing how big his smirk grew, as he continued fucking your mouth. 
“You’re such a pretty little whore, darling,” Tartaglia moaned. 
Your body jolted at the sudden smack that Neuvillette landed on your ass, gently caressing the spot right after. Wriothesley spanked you as well, making you moan on Tartaglia’s cock that was ruthlessly thrusting into your mouth. Neuvillette held your body in place, his grip almost bruisingly tight, whilst he grinded his hips against your drenched cunt, earning more muffled moans from you. 
“Look at you being all blushed, love,” Neuvillette cooed in your ear, landing another hard smack on your reddened by now ass. 
“I bet you’re feeling lonely down here.” Wriothesley smirked at you, raising his head from your titties, his hand slipping down and rubbing your folds in-between your bare cunt and Neuvillette’s clothed crotch. 
“Oh fuck—” Tartaglia reached his limit, unleashing his hot seed in your mouth, as his head fell back. He kept your head in place, his cock still deeply buried in your throat, until you had swallowed everything. 
Pulling out, he left you gasping for air, your chest rising and falling rapidly in your attempt to regulate your stolen breath. Tartaglia caught your chin and pulled you to your feet, crushing his lips on yours. Wriothesley came behind you, biting your nape and smirking as you moaned. He grabbed your hands and handcuffed them behind your back. He smacked your ass once more, then undressed and assumed a seat next to Neuvillette who had also discarded his clothes. You felt Alhaitham’s arms wrapping around your body from behind, him leaving marks all over your shoulder and nape. 
Alhaitham caught your hair and pulled you away from Tartaglia, biting your earlobe as you whined. He turned you to face the Fontainian duo, bending you over. Neuvillette and Wrothesley slapped their hardened cocks on your cheeks, looking at you with the authority you’d expect stemming from their positions as Chief Justice and Lord of the Fortress of Meropide. You choked back a scream, feeling Alhaitham suddenly penetrating you from behind. You turned over your shoulder to look at him for just a moment, only for Wriothesley to grab your chin and avert your attention back to them. 
“Get to work, kitten,” he barked, his sharp canines visible through his smirk. 
“Or are you perchance planning on leaving us in this torturous state?” Neuvillette asked you, the straining of his hard cock evident on his face. 
And whilst the Scribe was obliterating your cunt, Tartaglia and Zhongli were stroking themselves, looking at you getting fucked before them like the little slut you were. They landed a few slaps on your ass and grabbed your titties harshly, while you started tending to Neuvillette, licking up a few strides on his shaft. Your tongue swirled around the tip of his thick cock, sucking it in your mouth. His eyes closed for a moment, revering in the sensation of you slowly taking all of him in your mouth. You gagged, trying to accommodate him in your tight throat. But Neuvillette was already long lost in pure ecstasy, head thrown back and breathy whimpers escaping his lips. 
You whined as you felt Alhaitham pull out of your cunt, your muffled sound sending vibrations on his cock. You were so close to feeling that euphoric rush course through your veins, only for him to deny it. You attempted to release Neuvillette and complain about Alhaitham’s unacceptable behaviour, only for Wriothesley to force your head down, tears falling from your eyes, as his action caused Neuvillette to sharply hit the back of your throat. 
“Don’t stop now, kitten. Don’t tease him like that, not when he’s so close to cumming.” Wriothesley gently rocked your head, helping you ease up and continue your work. “You never know. He might even accuse you of disrespecting him. And oh my, it’s a serious crime to disrespect the Chief Justice. Once sentenced, you’ll be sent to the Fortress of Meropide.” He smiled. “Don’t worry, I’ll take good care of you, kitten.” 
“Don’t— Don’t speak nonsense, Wriothesley,” Neuvillette breathed heavily. 
Alhaitham only smirked, seeing you at Wriothesley’s mercy. He slapped your dripping cunt once, licking your arousal off his fingertips, while his ears feasted on your muffled moans. Tartaglia leant over your bent form, leaving soft kisses on your shoulder, as his fingers rubbed your drenched folds, laughing devilishly at the slight trembling of your legs. He slipped his fingers inside your tight cunt, thrusting them roughly. He relished the image of your convulsing body, your cunt coating his fingers with your slick. And yet he sadistically stopped right before your impending release.  
Tartaglia removed his fingers momentarily, before burying his cock in your velvet walls. He held onto your waist, slamming your hips on him, moaning in pleasure as he ripped your body in half. Neuvillette tensed in your mouth, painting every inch of your throat with his sweet cum. He caressed your hair softly, smiling lovingly at you, his eyes glued to your tear-stained face with his cock still in your mouth. Wriothesley finally let go of your head, allowing you to pull back and catch your breath. 
“Are you having fun, kitten?” he asked, gently caressing your cheek. 
“Mmmm…” You nodded. “T-This is… So much better than I could… Ever imagine…” You smiled. “Ah, wait— No!” you whined. “Tartaglia, please—” you cried. 
So close, yet so far away. The Harbinger pulled out of your drenched folds, leaving you just as unsatisfied as Alhaitham had. Your body was burning with a carnal urge for release, yet they didn’t seem to be willing to give it to you. You watched Zhongli lean over you, massaging your breasts and kissing a tear away from your cheek. 
“Zhongli… Please…” you begged him. 
He refrained from replying to you. Zhongli rubbed the tip of his cock on your soaked folds, coating it in your slick, before thrusting into your cunt that immediately tightened around him, desperate to reach that sweet high. Contrary to the other two, the Geo Archon switched to a slower pace, even though his thrusts remained as rock solid hard as ever. The room was filled with your slutty moans, as well as the sounds of Zhongli forcefully smashing his hips on yours, abusing and stretching your cunt in a way that sent you over to cloud nine. 
Wriothesley grabbed your chin, turning you to face him. He slipped his thumb in your mouth, watching you suck on it ever so willingly. “Stick your tongue out,” he ordered and you obeyed without a second thought, feeling too fucked out to raise any objections. He slapped his hardened cock on your tongue a few times, before sliding it all in. He grabbed your hair and guided your movements, growling in utter bliss at the magic of your tongue. He was struggling not to thrust up. You knew, because his grip on your hair only tightened. Ultimately, though, Wriothesley grew too desperate for release, pounding up straight to your throat, feeling you gag around him, before he unleashed his seed in your mouth. 
You thought that this time, this time for sure, you were going to experience that blissful feeling that had your mind go blank. You had only yourself to blame for getting your hopes high, as you were disappointed by Zhongli pulling out of you when your orgasm was just around the corner. You were whining and complaining and they were all just watching you amused, barely able to keep themselves from destroying you. 
Zhongli lifted you in his arms, carrying you to the armchair you were previously sitting on. He sat down with you on his lap. He kissed your lips, holding your head in place, feeling you shift on his lap. Alhaitham had come, standing behind you, holding one of your legs open, Zhongli holding the other. The Scribe’s fingers thrusted into your drenched cunt, the squelching sounds filling the room. The other three watched you intently squirm and convulse over the Geo Archon’s body, as your much awaited orgasm was here at last. 
Alhaitham wrapped his hand on your neck, turning you to him, as he leant down to lazily kiss your lips. Zhongli aligned his cock with your cunt and thrusted in. You suddenly broke the kiss, whimpering, seeing Tartaglia penetrate your cunt as well, rubbing against Zhongli. You were struggling to accommodate them both in your tight cunt, whimpering and crying and writhing all over Zhongli’s body. Alhaitham kissed you again, running his fingers soothingly along your trembling body. Your mind was slowly fucked out, every single thought fading in the abyss, but from the single one focusing on the two of them pounding into you. 
“Mmmm… Yes! Yes!” you moaned. “Oh, fuck!” 
“What a naughty little girlie~” Tartaglia cooed, smirking. 
Neuvillette and Wriothesley were standing on either side of you, stroking their cocks, massaging or slapping your titties from time to time and rubbing your clit, earning some high pitched moans and screams from you. 
“Please, don’t stop!” you begged, once more on the edge of another release. “Oh Archons, please, don’t stop!” 
And you were so thankful that they didn’t. Your cunt tightened around them, convulsing around their throbbing cocks, your slick coating them. They soon followed after you, cumming into your velvet walls, your mixed arousals dripping down your thighs. Mere seconds later, your body was covered in the cum of the other three men, painting over the marks they had already left all over you. 
They all took a moment to just glance and be mesmerised and bewitched by your beauty. Your makeup was ruined, yet you looked just as breathtakingly pretty as ever. Your lipstick was smudged and there were lipstick stains in every part your lips had touched on their bodies. Your hair was dishevelled and drenched in sweat, just like your body. And oh fuck… The sight of your cunt clenching around Tartaglia’s and Zhongli’s cocks, stuffed to the brim with cum that slipped out and down your thighs was enough to get them all hard all over again. 
Tartaglia slowly pulled out, strings of cum glistening on his cock, whilst Zhongli remained deeply sheathed in your cunt. You were resting your head on his shoulder, watching them drunk-dazed change positions. Neuvillette positioned himself in-between your legs, which were held open by Wriothesley and Alhaitham. Tartaglia was standing behind you, choking your neck and sliding two of his fingers into your mouth, as he nibbled down your earlobe. Your head pressed hard against Zhongli’s shoulder, your back arching, as Neuvillette dived into your sensitive cunt as carefully as ever. 
Tartaglia was choking back your moans, your eyes glued to the man in front of you whose cock was drilling into you, ripping you in half. Neuvillette leant over you, kissing your lips, as both he and Zhongli continued fucking your slutty hole that creamed harder and harder all over them. There was not a single thought in your mind. You were a bubbling little mess, moaning and whimpering and begging “mmm, more, more!” and crying “oh fuck, it feels so good”. They were all looking at you, smirking at the little whore you were for them. And oh they adored it. 
Your moans and whimpers and pleads and cries stirred something within the two men who were quite literally fucking you dumb. You screamed in pure bliss, Zhongli and Neuvillette pounding now into you as if their lives depended on it; as if the harder they thrusted, the longer their satisfaction would be prolonged. If they were honest, you just drove them mad, sending them over the edge of insanity with those sounds you made, forcing them to make haste into chasing after the euphoric feeling of cumming into those perfect, pulsating walls of yours. Your lips parted to moan thank yous, as the two of them poured their seed deep in your cunt. 
This time, you were not allowed not even a second of respite. Neuvillette carefully picked you up from Zhongli’s lap. He was holding you tenderly in his arms, contrary to the desperate lust that gleamed in his eyes. Your body jolted, feeling Wriothesley’s soft lips kiss the nape of your neck. He took your handcuffs off, caressing your arms and peppering your shoulder with kisses. Neuvillette took your hands and wrapped them around his neck, his hands travelling down to your waist.
“Hold on tightly, love.” 
Before you could even understand what he meant, you yelped surprised, as Neuvillette and Wriothesley lifted you in their arms. Your grip around his neck tightened, making him chuckle. You felt them both slowly penetrating your cunt, a low whimper escaping your lips, as your walls engulfed them in a tight hug. 
“Even after being fucked all these times, your cunt is still greedy for more.” Wriothesley bit your neck. “What a little whore you are, my kitten.” 
“Mmmm~” you meowed, unable to form a single sentence. 
They ravaged your cunt, spilling out all the cum that had been stuffed in it. Their grips on your body were bruisingly tight, coming in complete contrast with the softness of their lips that burnt you fiercely wherever they touched. Wriothesley was biting all over your neck, sadistically wanting to draw out those gorgeous screams of yours that were music to his ears, making him harder and harder. 
“You’re doing so well, love,” Neuvillette praised with that moaning voice of his. “Taking us both so well… Such a good girl…”
“Mmmm, yeah…” Wriothesley agreed. “Such a good slut…”
You were lost between Neuvillette’s praises and Wriothesley’s degradation. You caught a glimpse of the other three men who were watching you with utmost concentration, the three of you having captured their full attention, them jerking themselves off at the show you provided. Wriothesley choked your neck, turning you to look at Neuvillette, who crushed his lips on yours. You were tightening and pulsing around them, urging them to obliterate your greedy little cunt like never before. And you had no objection to that. 
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© strawchocoberry — do not copy, repost, translate or reuse my work
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ozzgin · 6 months
Text
Yandere! Yakuza x Reader (II)
Reader is cozying up to her unusual home, and her new friend decides to surprise her with a romantic gift. Or at least what he considers to be romantic: a small reminder that no one else can mess with her. Continuation to the yakuza landlord idea!
[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5]
Content: Female reader, obsessive behavior, mentions of stalking, violence, death, mild gore
Tags: @depressed-but-make-it-cute
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You search for your keys and open the postal box, retrieving a thick envelope. You've been living at the new apartment for several weeks now and truth be told, you could get used to this lifestyle. Your commute to work is much shorter, the path is never devoid of people, and there are multiple bakeries on the way back with some of the best pastries you've tasted in your life.
You turn around and look for Daitou, somewhat distracted and dreamy. It really feels like a Hallmark movie. A peaceful, idyllic life. Ah, there he is! The scarred man is standing guard before one of the stores. The curtains have been pulled, blocking any glimpse of the inside. You walk towards him with a certain joyful bounce in your step. As you approach him, you can hear muffled screams coming from the building. He notices you and flashes you a smile. 
"Don't come too close, I hear the owner's been avoiding his loan payment and getting all friendly with the neighboring Family. We're questioning him in the back."
"Don't you usually do the interrogations?" 
"Only if we don't need them afterwards. I'm not too good at keeping them alive, ya know?" He scratches the back of his head and laughs awkwardly. "Do you need anything?"
You open your mouth to speak, but it's a little difficult to formulate a full sentence with the interrupted moans and cries occasionally making their way out. The door is ajar and you avoid glancing in its direction, fixating on the man before you. 
"I...uh... just wanted to know if this letter is intended for me or the landlord. It looks like an official document."
You show Daitou the envelope and just as he is about to grab it, he notices the blood stains seeped into his glove. He quickly removes it, wipes his hand on his shirt, and nonchalantly plucks the paper from your fingers.
"That's for Boss. I'll pass it on, so don't worry."
You nod and bow slightly before hurrying back home. Well, doesn't make it less of a movie, you suppose. Just more of a thriller. Or something like that. You drop your bag, slip off your shoes and throw yourself onto the futon with a loud thud. The warmth of the sheets envelops you and the wails of the shop owner become but a distant dream. 
Without the worry of stalkers, or finding a roof above your head, you can finally rest. 
Tonight is rather dark, with the moon shrouded in heavy clouds. Daitou yawns silently as he observes the masked man testing out passcodes for the entrance. Every now and then he lets out a whispered curse, crossing out another number combination on his little crumpled note. It doesn't take a genius to figure out this is the famed stalker you'd complained about earlier. No one else currently lives in the building. 
Eventually, the keypad lights up and the door unlocks. The mysterious man lifts a fist victoriously and reaches for the handle. 
"Oop! Not so fast!" Daitou drops his heavy, sinewy arm over the man's shoulders, pulling him in a friendly embrace. Like two old pals meeting at an intersection. "Let's take a walk together, what do you say? (Y/N) sleeps until noon on weekends, no need to hurry."
With a grunt, the stalker tries to shove himself out of the tightening hold, but the yakuza doesn't budge. He towers over his new friend with an unfaltering, unbothered grin. 
"Now listen, I don't blame you one bit, ya know? I ain't blind, at least not in this eye", he continues as he points to the real counterpart of his glass prosthetic, "so I'm damn well aware of a pretty girl when I see one. And (Y/N)? That's some good taste alright." 
He gives the man an affectionate pat over the chest, pulling him away from the building into one of the side streets. 
"If you want, we can have a drink before the deed, I know a good place five minutes from here. We can share some stories of our favorite girl, eh?" Daitou looks at his watch, feigning mild concern. "But I'm afraid you're not leaving this neighborhood either way. In one piece, that is." 
His arm goes limp and the masked man is released from the iron hold, tripping over from the sudden lack of support. He crawls against a wall and fumbles for something, swiftly pulling out what seems to be a pocket knife. His breathing is erratic and he points the tip of the blade towards the yakuza, now with his features darkened by a frown. He sounds like an entirely different person and the instant switch to a ragged voice startles the stranger.
"See, the trouble is, I promised miss (Y/N) I wouldn't allow a fucking dog like you to be in her presence ever again. Sadly for you, I'm a man of my word." Despite the threatening tone, his posture is relaxed and he stands before the stalker with his hands bare. 
"If I were you, I'd use that little butter knife on my own throat. I don't go easy on horny cockroaches. Especially the ones that mess with my woman." His final words spill out in a bitter growl. 
A small animal in the trashing jaws of a predator. Blood splatters and pools in the asphalt cracks and drained hands claw at the walls, hoping for an escape. As despair sinks in, the alleyway becomes quiet again, save for the merry whistle of the remaining party. Daitou carefully ties the trash bags with the focus of a child wanting to impress the parents with a chore well done. Halfway through he stops and gasps, surprised.
"Oh man, did I really just say 'my woman'? How embarrassing." He blushes and shyly pushes the wrapped slabs away. "I haven't even asked her out yet, ya know? Better not rat me out, Mr. Stalker." He snickers at his monologue and continues the cleanup. 
"Can you really not refrain yourself from smoking in here?" You try to fan away the puff of smoke, scowling at the young blonde man sitting across the table. 
"Why do you even care so much?" Kazuya groans and stuffs the remains of the cigarette in the ashtray.
"I don't want my carrot cake tasting like tobacco. You're lucky the old man is afraid of you, otherwise you would've gotten your ass banned a long time ago."
"You know, I've been thinking about it lately - haven't you gotten quite the attitude? You have a big mouth for someone surrounded by dangerous gangsters. I could blow your brains out right now." 
He lowers himself in his seat and briefly lifts his shirt, flashing a carelessly tucked in gun. He stares at you for a few seconds, as if expecting a reaction, then lets out a chuckle upon seeing your indifferent expression. 
"Shameless. You could at least try to pretend you don't know I have a soft spot for you."
"Just a wild guess, but your Boss probably wouldn't appreciate you shooting civilians in the middle of a café. That's all." You respond with a shrug. 
Your banter is interrupted by Daitou's heavy footsteps nearing in your direction. Kazuya waves, signaling your location, and kicks a chair out, inviting his friend to join. 
"Where the hell were you last night? I thought you'd come with us for drinks after that long ass questioning."
"Sorry, I had to take care of something." Daitou returns an apologetic smile and tilts his head to gaze at you. "Which reminds me, I brought you this."
Your eyes widen in surprise and a faint red tints your cheeks. Was there some special occasion you didn't know about? He places a small box in your hands and leans back in his chair with a cheerful smirk on his face. Kazuya watches the interaction, equally curious as you. 
You open the mysterious gift, giddy with anticipation. The nauseating smell abruptly invades your nostrils and you can feel the contents of your stomach bubble up and pile at the back of your throat. You gag involuntarily and slap your hands over your mouth, as the box tumbles down. A single severed human finger and some teeth glistening with moisture roll out. 
"What the fuck is wrong with you?!"
Kazuya jumps from his seat, toppling over the table in the process, and lunges at Daitou's throat. The latter can only stare in shock, baffled at a reaction he didn't foresee. There's genuine confusion shaping his features.
"But-...I thought..."
"What the hell did you think, that you'd show up with fucking human remains over some tea and cake?! Jesus, Daitou, she ain't our Lieutenant!"
"But I did- I did tell (Y/N) I'd..." he tries to find you with a pleading, worried look. 
Once the risk of vomiting on the floor has diminished, you shove yourself between the men and gently try to remove Kazuya's arm, still clawed around the other man's throat.
"Let him go, Kazuya. He didn't mean to scare me." You glance at Daitou reassuringly. "Does that mean the stalker guy is now a solved matter?"
The yakuza nods energetically, his eyes now sparkling with pride. He knew you'd understand. Once the tension is lifted, you quickly sweep the gory tokens back into their box and explain the situation to Kazuya. He collapses back in his seat with a frustrated sigh, facepalming himself. 
"I'm so sorry, (Y/N), I should've told you he's being serious when he says shit like this." He glares at his friend. "She didn't actually expect you to go ahead and do it, dumbass. Couldn't you just mention it or something? 'Hey, I took care of that pervert following you around'! You think she would've demanded proof?"
Daitou is nervously fidgeting with his glass eye, as if searching for the proper words.
"But you always say women will like you more if you surprise them with gifts." He concludes with a pout.
There's a prolonged moment of silence and you burst our laughing, as the blonde simultaneously lets out an exasperated whine. You cannot get over the bizarre sight in front of you: someone as massive and imposing as Daitou, cornered like a punished school boy. 
"See, this is what I've been telling Boss. You're a lost cause." Kazuya rests his elbows on his knees, closing the distance between him and Daitou and continuing with a lecturing tone. "If you got a crush on someone, you bring them flowers or something! What are you, a crackhead? Do I have to teach you basic manners?"
"More importantly, uh...what should I do with these? I guess jewelry made of teeth is a thing, but the finger? Won't it go bad?" you cautiously dangle the package next to your ears, listening to the rustle of its contents. 
Kazuya rips the box from you.
"I'm starting to suspect you don't have all the tiles on your roof either. I'll get rid of it, so you better pretend nothing ever happened. Are we clear?"
Both you and Daitou nod obediently.
On your way back, the man can't help the excitement building up in his chest. You liked his gift, didn't you? He hasn't done anything wrong. Does that make it official, then? As he ponders the implications, he peeks at your small frame, barely managing to keep up with him. Would it be alright if he reached for your hand? Is he supposed to ask first? All these steps confuse him to no end.
Nonetheless, he couldn't be more thankful for you. 
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