#ive been spoiled for like everything tho

[purplepixel]

So.

I read issue 44 of idw.

[daydadahlias]

hey jessssssssss can you pretty please say anything about a wip ure writing (ure my most favourite ever i love you mwah ^_^)

hi pookieeeee <3 I CAN say anything about a wip I'm writing (u r my most favorite ever ily2 mwah >3<)

ok so I have a few wips in the works rn (including this shortie one that hopefully I can post fairly soon eek) but what I am most excited about is that I have Officially Started my next Chaptered Fic™ (which is fondly called groupie fic).

I've only just started chapter one (~2k rn) but I'm already in love with it lol and I know it won't be a while until I share it but I'm really excited to !!! :D I love writing chaptered fics and I love having FUN with them. And, bc it's an AU, I've already gotten to plan some stuff and make up some fun things !! like, for instance, Calum is in a ~band~ (not 5sos) that I got to name anddd because the entire fic takes place on a tour, I also got to plan a tour !!! which is. kind of a logistical + geographical nightmare dude bc i had to pick the places, the dates, and the venues within the places blah blah blah but yeah :) I'm really excited about all of it. I even made a tour poster lol <3

but !! yeah !! I'm really excited about my fake little band that Calum is playing in <3 and I'm excited to for him to meet his future fave groupie <3 and I'm really excited to write them falling in love over secret hook-ups at hotels and ~forbidden pasts~ (bc those are my favorite) and I'm excited to get to share it all w/ people when it's written !!!!

thank u for asking :)

[nicastamatis]

read all of csm today and i rly told myself i wouldnt be an akiangel guy but man. the pushing daisies cling film kiss. of it all.

[haemosexuality]

btw i got my second ending (dreamer hornet) and now im fighting the moth fucker

[proonv]

okay hold on. POKEMON SCARLET IS RELEASING IN A WEEK?????????

[rotdistressxox]

Headcanons: How the Papas treat you during your time of the month ♡

!nsfw undertones, afab body parts mentioned (obv)

Primo / Papa Emeritus I

• Knows when it starts and when it ends, he keeps a very close eye on those types of things. He even reminds you when it's coming up

• Has the most experience with this type or situation from the rest of his brothers because of his age.

• VERY Understanding

• Always there when you need to cry. Will try his best not to get on your bad side or tease you that often

• Constantly reassures you about your emotions.

• "My love, it's okay to be upset about (insert sort of dumb reason to be upset)"

• Washes your clothes when you accidentally get blood on them, you are NOT doing any physical labor on his watch.

• Will run you a nice bath with rose petals picked from the ministry garden.

• Will also read you your favorite book while you're in said bath.

• Gentle touches on your arms as he looks you in the eye to distract you from cramps.

• Spoils you rotten with kisses and whatever else you desire~

• Offers to give you other means of relieving pains. Wink wink

Secondo / Papa Emeritus II

• Is also very experienced with this

• Wanna talk about spoiled rotten? THIS MAN WILL GET YOU ANYTHING YOU WANT ON THE SPOT

• Use his body as a heating pad, especially his hands.

• The master at giving lower body massages to help soothe your pain.

• Kisses kisses kisses. He plants them everywhere when he senses that you need him.

• Will drop everything he's doing just to be with you for the day if you request.

• As the biggest and physically strongest papa, he will not hesitate to carry you anywhere if it gets that bad.

• Whispers romantic poetry in your ear while you take recovery naps.

• Also doesn't want you doing too much work, he'll send a Ghoul to watch after you whilst you do your daily tasks when he's busy.

Terzo / Papa Emeritus III

• Prepares your bed. Propped up and fluffed pillows, your favorite texture of blankets folded right there for you. Unless, you'd like to spend the night with him ;)

• The least experienced out of all the Papas. His experience with lovers have been great in quantity but low in quality as they're all usually 1 night stands or short flings. Until...he met you.

• Of course he knows what a period is, but he struggles at first with not knowing what to do for you.

• Gets the hang of it very quickly tho

• Flowers and more flowers. Surprises you with a new bouquet everyday of the cycle.

• Wants to make you laugh and smile as much as possible, so expect a bunch of corny jokes.

• Is that a frown he sees?

• "What's the difference between a glass of wine and an erection" "I dunno?" "You're not giving me a glass of wine right now" "PAPA-"

• Is gentle as possible with you, doesn't want to overdo the affection. Because let's be honest, on a normal day he'd be sneaking you passionate kisses every few minutes

• Expect your favorite dinner every night for the next few days, he's pretty good at cooking.

Copia / Papa Emeritus IV

• Even if you feel gross and ugly, you are still currently the sexiest thing ever to him. And he will definitely remind you of that.

• Does research on what to do, makes special plans for the both of you.

• Please, he also needs reassurance that you're okay. Otherwise he's going to be sweating his paint off worrying about you.

• Also a corny joke teller, they're more like dad jokes though.

• Gets food delivered for you. Unlike his brothers, he's a threat to the kitchen and not allowed anywhere near it.

• "Um...aha.... what size" gulp "what size- pu..ssy, do you wear?"

• Honestly he wants to know about what it's like experiencing it. So he always asks questions and is willing to learn more.

• Accidentally calls you his little ketchup packet, it made you laugh so hard that he thought you stopped breathing.

• Kisses and snuggles into your lower abdomen, he reallyyyy likes it when you're a little bloated because it provides extra cushion

• Literally melts when he sees you in your pajamas, cuddled up to a heating pad, and eating whatever.

Psst heyyy, thanks for reading my first post <3 ❤️

[choccy-milky]

omg hi ive been following u bc i love ur comics but i did'nt realise that you have a fanfiction?? and that its rlly big on ao3. i thought u were just a tumblr comic creatorrr. anyway im gonna go and read it now but i love clora so muchhhhh!! <3

thank u for ur committment!!

BAHAHA my brainrot cannot be satisfied with just fanart or fanfic I NEED TO DO BOTH🤪🤪thats so funny tho LOL but THANK YOU!! AND I HOPE U LIKE IT💖💖🙏

THANK YOU!! AND SOON!! im writing as we speak, and i just decided what i want the drawing for this chapter to be and quickly drew it using my laptop trackpad before i forget LMFAO

look at this masterpiece???like😍😍😍heres your sneak peek for next chap!!

LMFAO AND HES NOT EVEN THE FIRST IVE HAD MANY PPL TELL ME THIS, clora will never escape the clorox allegations😩

IMMA BE REAL ITS LIKE 50/50. in my headcanon, seb was never the type to really want children/care about children. like if he never met clora i imagine him just graduating and becoming a curse-breaker or auror and going off on his own. but since meeting clora its like damn.....i do want kids with u.....i think #1 for him would be out of a desire to have clora be his full ass wife and have everything with her that comes with that (ie children) and warming up to the idea more, and then ofc once he actually sees the kid born ITS OVER (i also have it planned that their first kid is gonna be a girl with blonde hair and blue eyes so like......a little mini clora. sebs doomed🥺hes gonna spoil her so bad🥺🥺)

AW TYYY💖💖im glad you like how i draw him🥹 and ikr i need to draw older seb more, bc i am a slut for seb in that trenchcoat and black gloves🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️actually wait while we're on the topic of my curse-breaker comic, i forgot about this LMAOO. I NEEDED REFERENCE PICTURES OF SEBS POSE so i put on a coat and similar shoes and forced my roommate to take pictures of me (she was very confused but also very supportive) i was like "i need you to take a picture of me on all fours from multiple angles. AND ITS NOT FOR SMUT I SWEAR" LMAO (i still dont think she believed me)

im dead it looks like im in the depressed anime pose bc theres no choccy milky in the fridge or something😩😩

[cumulo-stratus]

BAU autism headcannons

(GIF NOT MINE)

(male reader)

CW: possible swearing, mentions of meltdowns and overstimulation, lemme know if theres anything else!

A/N: sry i havent rly posted in a while, i started a school recently and its been a rly big change for me so ive just been emotionally/mentally exhausted like all the time, but i dont wanna abandon u guys so i decided i would get something up, even if its not super good, thanks for y’all’s understanding <3

i think both JJ and Emily would become sort of mothers to reader

(not that they werent already mothers to the rest of the team but reader especially)

like JJ would totally have a motherly instinct for readers needs (like a sort of spider sense)

like if your ever nervous about something being too much or being overwhelming, jj would kinds know this and either make arrangements for accommodations or make sure you know you dont have to go if you want to.

and like she definitely wold put herself in charge of keeping your safe foods stashed on the jet and at the office

emily is more of a mother in a protective way than jj is

like this girl will not hesitate at all to go off on someone for maybe being disrespected to about stimming your chair while thinking

or like if you dont want to shake a police officers hand when your being introduced, and you get dirty/weird looks for it, or anyone comments on it? BOOM this girl will stare at them with so much animosity they’ll be scared of her shes so hot oml

anyways i thinks he team would be super accepting of you, especially if you joined after reid like they would already have some experience with autism

and like if you weren’t ent comfortable telling anyone other than hotch(i feel like it would be like a in ur file thing idk how the government works tho) spencer would defo be able to tell and confront u privately abt it (our respectful king <3)

and if you are comfortable telling the team, everyone would be respectful

i think like rossi/gideon would be a little clueless but like trying their hardest

like rossi would have no idea what stimming is but understands that like you move in certain ways or make certain noises when ur excited

and like with all his money he wouldnt hesitate to spoil u with any fidget toy u need/want or like a rly nice weighted blanket (its insane how expensive those things are)

and like gideon despite his profound understanding of others (hope yall got that ;)) he wouldn’ t get why sometimes you dont feel like/cant talk but totally respects it

omg garcia is our autism ally QUEEN im telling you

always has a big basket of fidgets/stim toys sitting on her desk and when your having a rough day shell leave you a little goodie in a brightly colored and decorated bag

i firmly believe that she is the queen at finding brands with clothes that not only fits your style perfectly but is also sensory friendly

i think she would definitely say that if she never ended up working in the FBI she wouldve started a clothing shop for sensory friendly clothing/accessories

spencer would totallllyyyy be your best friend when it comes to being under-stimulated

he will totally info dump on you and vice-versa

spencer (like penlope) would totally recommend clothing brands that are sensory friendly, but sock brands in particular

and everyone makes fun of you for nerding out over everything

also spencer would definitely get in the habit of grabbing your hands in his when you start to pick a t your nails and cuticles

like he didnt even realize what he was doing the first time but now he does it without thinking about it and for the team its normal

“hey,” and he would gently grab your hands to stop you from picking at them

“sorry..”

”youve nothing to be sorry for” (with that little reid smile oml rf[osifjgturhv)

and i also firmly believe that morgan is the best people to go to if your having a meltdown

he would stop you from harmfully stimming

“hey sugar, unclench those pretty little hands for me. there we go… good job kid.” he would have the softest smile and voice

and when he takes your hands to stop you from hitting yourself his grip is rly firm but gentle

but hotch is the best to go to for when your overstimulated

like he would make sure you know his office is always a quiet place you can go to with out questions

and he would secretly have a stash of like stimm toys in his office that he stole from garcia

his couch is always open to you, especially like late at night if you are really tired his fatherly instincts will kick in and force you to come to his office for a break

he would would hand you and blanket and a stim toy

”sit. sleep”

thats all he would say in his cute little stern but actually caring voice <3

[lemmetreatya]

Husband!Reiner x Black!fem Reader

this isnt as hunky dory as i initially thought this to be but i think its still a valid insight into life with rei. surprisingly ive been having a lot of news, convos and experiences with various people in my own life about marriage and children so i guess this post was a subconscious embodiment of that. either way, enjoy 🫶🏾

Husband!Reiner knows he lucked out in bagging you and he absolutely adores people coveting him. everytime he tells someone hes cuffed, he literally cannot wait to show them a picture of you

Husband!Reiner always spoils you when it comes to bringing home gifts. Its rare that he ever comes home empty handed. more times than less he’s entering in with your favourite snacks or maybe a bracelet he thought suited you whilst he was on break earlier in the day

Husband!Reiner isnt picky when it comes to food. that man would eat just about ANYTHING you feed him and say how its the best thing hes ever tasted. not that youre a bad cook, but he’d find a way to praise even the simplest of meals.

“god, baby, this so good!” reiner’s cheeks were bulging full of food whilst he gave his compliment.

with a sweet laugh, you shook your head whilst opening a beer for him by cocking the tin lid with an opener.

“its literally just rice and stew. you eat it all the time by now.” placing the bottle next to his plate, you bent down to kiss his forehead.

he made a grunt of disagreement.

“dont change the fact that it’s always so good!”

Husband!Reiner is quite reserved when it comes to intimacy and sex. the furthest he’d go in terms of public displays of attraction is hold your hand or a quick peck on the cheek. he’d occasionally lean his chin on your shoulder when in the presence of other company.

however, in the private presence of each other, his attitude towards public reservations has never stopped him from pulling you to the side for a quick fuck before you go out with the girls or letting you go down on him once parked outside his family home for a visit.

Husband!Reiner isnt the best with chores. He tried to help in the past, and has the utmost purest intentions when offering his help, but his standard of clean isn’t the same as yours and so you believe you’re better off just doing everything yourself.

Husband!Reiner is really handy with manual labour tho!! if anythings broken around the apartment hes more than happy to get on it right away. if hes unsure how, he’ll find a tutorial on youtube and work it out from there

Husband!Reiner helps with all the tricky stuff with your hair. whether it be helping you to twist it before bed, wash day or being a live wighead for you to style your pieces — he’s available.

he learnt especially for you but always says if he’s possibly going to have a black daughter one day then hes gonna have to learn.

Husband!Reiner wants kids. its one of the few things the two of you disagree on and several arguments have lead out from that. he loves kids in general but he gets particularly broody whenever he babysits or goes to visit his baby cousin gabi.

it also doesnt help that Husband!Reiner has a particular breeding kink. hes okay with you going on BC because that’s your business and it means he can bottom out anytime! but it does sadden him that in result it means he cant give smol gabi a playmate

“i just think it’d be nice for her to have someone to play with!” he said as he tooths another parting in your hair with the metal rod of the comb. he gingerly took a scoop of hair grease from the tub before layering it down onto your exposed scalp.

“but rei, thats not your— our —responsibility to deal with. its her parents job to give her a sibling if need be so you gotta stop stressing about it like it’s your problem to solve.”

the man was quiet for awhile as he continued to grease your head. when he sighed, he looked over at the two of you within the mirror.

“i know.” he said after awhile. “i just…i never had any siblings or cousins growing up, you know? i don’t know if id want her to go through the same thing i did.”

Husband!Reiner is very family oriented. even though its just the two of you, he still tries his best to make the most of holidays and time off. he always insists you have at least two ‘holidays’ to yourselves a year — sometimes abroad, sometimes on an excursion or even just a spa weekend away. that way when it comes to festive holidays, there isn’t a feeling of fatigue from NOT spending time with each other, meaning you can spend it with extended family and not feel drained from lack of timeout

Husband!Reiner smokes as a habit rather than a coping mechanism. his favourite brands are malboros but you absolutely hate the fresh smell of the smoke once hes come to you after one. he doesnt smoke as much as he did when you first met him.

(back then, he promised to ween off of them if you were to give him a chance! — he did for awhile but after he got closer to the Jaeger’s around a year ago, he picked up the habit again. that’s another thing you two argue about)

“reiner, that fucking stinks. get the fuck outside with that shit, i’ve told you about smoking that nastiness inside here.” you say, flailing your arms by your side as you walk into the living room.

turning around with a face of confusion, reiner spoke slowly in a low tone.

“but i literally am outside, im on the balcony.”

“then close the door! all that smoke is coming inside and it’s stinking up the place.” you exclaimed.

“but i wanna watch the match at the same time.” reiner pointed towards the tv but you could only shrug.

“watch it through the window then.”

“but then i wouldn’t be able to hear the tv!”

“reiner james braun, i swear—”

reiner didn’t want, nor wait, to hear what else you had to say to him. with a grumble beneath his breath, reiner complied and leaned backwards to slide the balcony door shut, the action slightly shaking the walls.

Husband!Reiner is hospitable but mostly for people he’s used to. he loves setting up gatherings for your friends to come round and enjoy each other’s company. since uni, a lot of you haven’t been able to see each other a lot but reiners a bit like the glue that keeps everyone in touch

however, since all of you know each other from around the same time (and because they paired the two of you up!) your friends sometimes felt responsible for your relationship and were weary of any ‘threat’ made towards it

“you two thinking of extending the family anytime soon?” mikasa said, her voice hushed as you, her and annie sat on the balcony and away from the bustle of everyone else inside

you made a noise of surprise at her inquiry.

“actually, we have been! i was thinking of getting either a cat or a puppy. im not too keen on dogs but they say if you nurse them from young, you can get them to behave really well.” you deflected as your mug of hot beverage made its way to your lips.

with an amused hum, annie side eyed you.

“you know thats not what she meant.” she said as she took an inhale of her cigarette. “she’s talking about kids and you know it.”

as soon as annie spoke, your mood suddenly soured. with a huff you looked up towards the night sky.

“why does everyone keep asking me this question? im sure no ones asking pieck and porco this shit and they’ve been together longer than us. or you and bertholdt! so why is it me thats always being asked this stuff?”

mikasa shuffled awkwardly in her seat. hugging the blanket she had over her higher towards her chin, she made a dejected sound before speaking. from that alone, you knew she was reluctant to say her next words.

“yeah but…you dont see either of them loudly proclaiming their contrasting ideas. all of them have decided between each other what they want and seem at peace with that. but reiner’s like…the broodiest man ever and never fails to remind us. the fact that you two dont have kids yet means there’s obviously a hold up on your behalf.”

at mikasas bold words, a dry laugh left your mouth. was this seriously the conversation you were having right now?

shrugging your shoulders, you gave her a wild look

“so?! is it such a bad thing for me to not want them? why’s everyone coddling around reiner and his needs of wanting kids? whys no one thinking of me — the person whos gonna have to carry said child and be their primary care giver — who says im ready to give this life up for that?! why’s no one taking my choices into consideration?”

softly hopping in her seat, mikasa briefly hid her face behind the blanket before pouting over at you.

“i am taking you into consideration! and i know! and im sorry for bringing it up again. eren put me up for asking because he says hes sick of reiner’s whining in the guy’s groupchat. you know im on your side regardless.”

mikasa laid her hand over on your exposed arm, her face laced with remorse but you couldn’t help but feel a twinge of discontent at the knowledge that reiner was vocal to your friends about you not wanting children.

blinking forwards, you could only weakly shrug. even though mikasa had given her reasoning for asking, you still couldn’t help but feel slightly betrayed

“i know, man but just… miss me with that bullshit. i know what im saying when i say i don’t want em right now.” you mumbled, now feeling more conflicted than before.

that night, you and Husband!Reiner have a bit of a honest conversation about how reiner talks about the whole kid thing with his friends. hes very quick to assure you that he doesn’t talk bad about you behind your back but tells them that he cant have them right now when you have a contrasting opinion to him

you personally dont have a problem with that because these were your friends too — theyed be quick to g-check reiner if he ever said something less than positive about you and then report it directly to you

but for the sake of the situation and with how sensitive it was, you asked reiner if he could refrain from sharing that personal aspect of your life with them

“i know i’ve said it way too many times now but im truly sorry for all this. mika was wrong for asking you that.” reiner says as you lay under his arm. you found solace by burying your face into his side.

“well i dont blame her. if you’re constantly telling people in the groupchat that kinda stuff then yeah, of course they’re gonna feel like they have to intervene. they’re our friends and they only want the best for us.”

you could really tell reiner was thinking this all over in his head by the way he made subconscious groans.

when he had finally made up his mind, he slightly bent down to kiss your forehead.

“yeah i guess so. i wont bring that stuff up again, im sorry for putting you in that position, baby.”

the two of you laid up next to each other, and went on to talk about other miscellaneous things. however, just when you were about to fall asleep, you tiredly mumbled into reiner’s skin.

“its not that i don’t ever want kids. i just…not now, rei. im still very much enjoying life with just the two of us. kids are hard work and a lifelong commitment. everything i know and do will have to change from here on out and i just dont think im ready for that kinda burden yet.”

with a lethargic hum, reiner nods his head.

“yeah, i get you.” he mumbles.

although Husband!Reiner still wants kids, he agrees to getting a puppy in the mean time. he says he might as well get the practice while he waits.

surprisingly Husband!Reiner is in absolute adoration of the new bundled edition. the pup is boisterous and hyper but listens to commands well and learns quickly

the puppy is even more enamoured by smol gabi who always seems to have either its tail or ear within her chubby small hands. still, the puppy only sees it as a bunch of fun

Husband!Reiner isnt perfect, and definitely has so many flaws where he needs to fix up on but he’s trying and he really does love you so you’re okay with working him through all of that.

[actualbird]

woop i guess here i go− does it ever bother u how they don't really ever quite explain what's going on with luke's illness other than "aAAAH he'S sUDDENLY in PAIN!!1!1!" and some sort of nerve damage and what not... not that it doesn't make it any less sadder... BUT!!! sometime ago i looked up the symptoms of nerve damage and apparently it says stuffs like sharp pains (which we see happen often to luke through out) BUT ALSO numbness, tingling, loss of muscle strength, and suddenly dropping stuff??? so i'm just wondering if you have any headcanons on luke's illness? DO YOU THINK HE'S JUST IN CONSTANT STINGING PAIN, AND HIS PAIN KILLERS ARE SO STRONG IT JUST NUMBS HIS WHOLE BODY??? OR DO YOU THINK HE ALTERNATES BETWEEN FEELING NUMB AND SUDDEN SHARP PAINS??? this has been my personal hc ever since jfjsjd i'm sorry you could see i'm a luke stan cause all luke stans are angst enjoyers /hj i just wanted to share my brain rot to the world thank you

hi anon!!! first off, i deffo wanna say uve come to the right place both abt luke hcs (because im a luke enjoyer first, a human being second) AND thoughts about his illness

tho i wouldnt say im bothered by how they dont explain the symptoms of his illness much since narratively, i can see how this would be necessary to maintain a certain amount of suspense on the NXX drug

however, ur so right in bringing up those other symptoms, bc ive got a bunch of thoughts and feelings about this!!

for context, i also have a longtime undiagnosed-after-years-of-tests neurological condition, but it's not serious and more just a lifetime inconvenience. i experience muscle myoclonus, which means that at any time without warning, my legs, arms, or neck can suddenly jerk into movement and ive actually got a bunch of those symptoms u mention haha!

but enough about that! lemme go thruuuuu

some of my thoughts/hcs on luke's illness

wc: 1.7k

before i start, this is whole thing is going to be mixing fiction (tot's story) and fact (IRL information on certain illnesses, medications, etc). the fiction bit is important because while tot describes luke's condition and shows us its effects, does Not name what it is, and the whole thing is still shrouded in a lot of mystery. but the fact bit is important because there are real conditions out there that are similar to what luke has, based on what we know.

among them, Fibromyalgia seems like the closest real world condition to what luke has got, but since it's not outright stated in canon, i'll be making some stuff up. still, it's important to me to have like, a somewhat sensible system in making stuff up, which is why im laying down all this ground work jhvjdhsfd, and because in the hc portion of this post i'll be riffing off of some of my own experience

anyhoo, let's REALLY start with what we already Know

-

what we know of luke's illness thus far from all the available story information from the global server

key words in that above title are "global server", because im aware that main story episode 9 in the cn server looks like it'll give us more info on this, but i dont like to or want to spoil myself for tot's future main story. so i'll be working within global server parameters!

so heres everything we know (...or rather, what i was able to remember in the course of me writing this response HAHA), as its been outright said and confirmed in canon:

luke's condition is currently diagnosed as terminal

luke's condition mostly manifests in sudden pain episodes that happen randomly and without warning. these pain episodes are not described to be coming from any specific body part, just that it's pain in general.

these pain episodes happen without any external trigger (i.e. luke doesnt have a pain episode when somebody bumps into him suddenly, but he can have a pain episode out of nowhere just doing something as passive as sitting or standing)

immediately after a pain episode, he takes his meds

these meds are analgesics (painkillers) and he was prescribed them by his previous doctor (the one who was handling luke and his condition before aaron)

even now that aaron has taken over as luke's primary physician, luke still takes painkillers immediately after any pain episode to manage the pain

luke's condition was caused by the NXX drug. after a mission where his team was attacked with toxic gas, he was the only survivor and the medicine he was given was somehow contaminated with the NXX substance

the NXX drug causes damage to the central nervous system, and luke's condition is confirmed to be related to his nervous system because in SSR Under The Milky Way, he describes his condition very specifically with the lines "[The contaminant] caused irreversible damage to my nervous system." and "[I] will constantly suffer from intermittent nerve pain."

-

hcs on The Experience Of The Condition

the main physical symptom we see in canon is pretty clear: sudden and randomly occurring debilitating pain. i like to think it's of the stinging variety!! but dialed up to 10000000 because it's always shown to be intense enough that always luke reacts to the pain. and luke's pain tolerance is High. in personal story 4, he didnt even flinch when mc was stitching up his gash, but he did double over in pain, trembling and shaking, when he got hit with one of the pain episodes.

in addition to the pain though, i totally second the motion on the symptoms of numbness, tingling, loss of muscle strength (which then leads him to train more to compensate for any loss, because luke is a madman with low self worth and one of his skills is his physical strength so he needs to keep that up for as long as he can), and suddenly dropping stuff, the ones you mention. a

those are my thoughts on possible physical symptoms. but with a condition as heavy as this, there will be psychological/emotional ramifications too

because of how tot's canon shows luke experiencing the Pain Symptom, the pain itself is put front and center. but personally i also think that the fact this symptom occurs Randomly, Suddenly, and Without Warning is on the same level of "oh god why this" as the pain

in general, not being able to know when your body is going to start working against you really really sucks! you cant prevent it, you cant avoid it, and you cant see it coming. sure you Can prepare for its random eventuality through out the day, which is what luke does by carrying around his painkillers everywhere with him, but even then, that only alleviates the specific instance currently happening and not the overall trend of It'll Happen Again! When? Secret....

it's hugely frustrating. in my case with involuntary movement, eventually i tried to constantly and impossibly try to expect it so that when it does happen, i dont knock over glass to the floor or fall down the stairs

but always trying to expect something you cant predict causes tension and anxiety.

luke's condition is much more severe and painful than my quirk. so keeping a mental background program, so to speak, always running and looking out for a pain episode of his condition must suck bigtime.

because he'll basically always be bracing himself for pain, even when nothing is happening.

and on a metaphorical level, being constantly braced for pain even when things are fine is something luke does A Lot. luke is always worried and preparing for worst case scenarios, luke is always trying to think ahead to have various backup plans to ensure people's safety, and luke seems more used to pain and bad things than he is prepared for happiness and good things.

bracing himself for pain gives luke a semblance of control over something that is terrifyingly out of his control completely. at least if hes always thinking about its inevitability, he'll have things that can help mediate its effects. but the price for that control is a constant tension and dread building inside of him every second, because hes always waiting for the other shoe to drop

-

my ideal hope for luke's story when a kind of treatment for his condition is found

i dont actually want for the condition to be completely cured. like, dont get me wrong, i obviously want the Terminal aspect of his condition treated because i love him and want him to live a long and happy life, but i dont want all of his symptoms gone. personally, i'd find it much more compelling narratively if his condition is treated and will no longer kill him in a few years, but still causes him pain that needs to be managed with meds and other treatments. and why i want this is because:

1 ) given the sheer struggle of his condition in the story thus far AND the fact that luke himself literally said the damage done to his nervous system is Irreversible, having a medical miracle like that happen feels a teensy bit like a deus ex machina to me. (sidenote: ofc, ur free to disagree with me! and feel free to disagree with this whole post in general, we've all got different opinions and thats chill)

2 ) in general with stories, i am less drawn to super neat resolutions and im more drawn to resolutions that are more like "and things werent perfect and they never will be, there will always be problems, but our characters will be okay and theyll keep getting better and better, and it's in this push and pull of struggle and learning and progress and getting through where their happiness lies"

ever since luke was a kid, even before he developed his condition, hes had the fear of being a burden to his loved ones. and when he does get his terminal condition, this fear is worsened and he starts to see his existence in other people's lives as a whole as a burden of pain and grief that isnt worth the trouble. and...i dunno, i just like the idea of him continuing to live but also continuing to have these problems that still spark fear inside of him and still take so much work to manage every day. and out of habit, he braces himself for pain, not just for the kind his condition gives him but from Life because Surely, His Loved Ones Will Get Tired Of All Of This, Of Him and The Problems He Comes With, Right?

but surprise surprise, they dont. because they care about him. because this should not and is not a dealbreaker for them continuing to care about him.

aaron creates treatment thats more on the preventative maintenance meds angle so luke doesnt have to just wait for a pain episode to pop up and then dry swallow painkillers every time. it's not infallible , but sometimes luke can have hours, even a whole a day sometimes where the pain hes bracing himself for doesnt come.

mc always reminds luke to take his meds whenever luke gets too busy or caught up in a case. he worries at first that it's an inconvenience to her for her to have to remember his routines for him just in case, but that worry becomes quieter as luke realizes she reminds him in the same tone as she says "good morning" or "have you had lunch yet? wanna join me?", just this casual and loving thing thats now integrated into both their lives

the team are always ready to help too in their own way. when luke gets a pain episode in hq, marius offers distraction in the form of idle chatter on (harmless) internal pax gossip while luke waits for his painkillers to dull down the stinging. when luke feels uncomfortable tingling crawling across his whole body while out with vyn, vyn subtly helps luke move from a crowded area to a quieter one where outside stimuli cant further overwhelm luke's senses. when it's a bad grip strength day and all luke wants to do is punch something and fuck his useless hands up even more, artem tells luke about custom silicone grips that exist for things like pens or knives or such and that they could look for some next time they go shopping.

it is not perfect. but luke's life, even with the pain, is still worth living. everybody is trying to help and eventually, luke learns how to start helping him self along with them too.

soooo yea theres my thoughts!! thanks for the ask, anon :D

[iveneverbeenmorestressedinmylife]

Για το character ask game, Maya Fey :3

First impression: wahh the silly....

Impression now: pls hasn't she suffered enough.... hasn't she lost enough... hasn't she been accused of enough murders....she is so silly and soo sad but also strong enough to still be silly after all this. I love her.

Favourite moment: that one moment in turnabout goodbyes when she spoke up against vk and gave phoenix a chance to save edgeworth....she had spent such a big part of that case feeling useless it felt very nice to see her be strong like this. Admittedly I haven't played aa3 yet nor have i spoiled myself everything about this game the way i had for the first two so i can't really speak about any potential maya moments here but i just know that there are some POWERFUL ones. Can't wait to see them play out.

Idea for a story: none </3 sowwy

Unpopular opinion: Ahhh welll. Admittedly i don't really see the appeal of franmaya....? Like sure the parallels are definitely there, ive seen them, i enjoy them and yet i just don't really care about it. But that's definitely a me "problem", i just can't possibly bring myself to care about more than one (1) romantic ship per franchise and narumitsu managed to hoard any and all potential interest for fictional romance i could possibly have.

Favourite relationship: Phoenix and maya seems like a pretty obvious answer but also....mia and maya.... because as per usual i cannot be normal about fictional sibling relationships.

Favourite headcanon: Food is just. A big comfort for her. Every time she is upset, or someone else is upset she strongly believes that hanging out and eating something will make things better. She probably can't cook to save her life tho. Also!!!! Her relationship with Mia was complex!!!! She was mad at her for leaving her behind just like their mother did but at the end of the day she just misses her so so so much. They really were all each other had at the beginning of the series and then Mia went and died......man....

[kurtsascot]

fic writer 20 questions

was tagged by @spookyklaine !!! thank you for the tag

tagging @daisyishedwig @bitbybitwrites @special-bc-ur-part-of-it @wowbright and anyone else thats interested seriously!!!! tag me in your answers i want to read them all

1. how many works do you have an ao3?

four !! but ive written around 10 in my life

2. whats your ao3 word count?

87k

3. what fandoms do you write for?

just glee <3

4. top 5 fics by kudos

not applicable

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

i do !!! sometimes i just dont know what to say;; i am terrible at keeping secrets and sometimes i know if i reply i will spoil something

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

treading water- the fic itself is angst heavy so the ending is naturally not all sunshine and rainbows.

7. whats the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

also, treading water. hoping to create something cute and really fulfilling c: it will have the longest ending just due to length so i think that helps default it to the happiest, no?

8. do you get hate on fics?

i havent yet thankfully

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

mhmmhm …and i dont really have a limit on what i would write? what can i say, i like steamy romances . whatever i want i write

10. do you write crossovers? whats the craziest one youve ever written?

i dont write them or read them, really. alternate universes though? ill eat that shit up every day

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

yes actually!!! years and years ago but i dont remember what story.

13. have you ever cowritten a fic before?

i havent. on one hand it sounds like a lot of fun, but on the other hand i know myself and i have relinquishing control over my writing. i wouldnt be opposed to it, i think, if i was close with the person i was writing with!

14. fave all time ship?

klaine ; no past ship can rival klaine brainrot <3

15. wip you want to finish but doubt you will?

succession!klaine au

16. what are your writing strengths?

its so hard to pick out your own strengths. i feel like dialogue is definitely one- i try to make everything thats said sound believable, and, ngl, it take me a while. dialogue is the first thing i write and last thing i edit.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

i dont have a great vocabulary. emotional moments can be hard because i only know few words and i wantvto communicate so many things….im always googling synonyms

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

i love it when other people do it, but i am not multilingual- i don’t feel like i could do it justice.

19. first fandom you wrote for?

hetalia- they are still up on fanfiction.net and at 13 yrs old, my prose was not something that should have been published on the internet. i cant take them down, though, so i go to my profile whenever i need a laugh

20. fave fic youve written?

treading water- my wip!! biggest thing ive ever written, most challenging, most fulfilling and the best ending (even tho the endings not posted yet teehee)

[the-kipsabian]

crow!! i’m watching alan wake 2 gameplay (even tho i never finished the first game oops. fake fan ik </3) and immediately thought of you. i’m fucking fascinated by this level of storytelling, even if i can’t remember a lot of the details and references. won’t spoil anything just in case, but hope you’re able to play/watch it soon! i know you’ve been buzzing for the new game :) x

aaaa sledge hello!! i actually do have the game now and i can run it on my setting, im just waiting on it a bit to see if they run out a few fixes for obvious bugs but im gonna get absolutely devoured by it hopefully soon!!

but god yeah from what ive seen people talk about, the story telling in this one goes DEEP and its extremely ambitious and layered and everything and god im just. im so ready for that. its gonna be such an experience like. sam lake is a goddamn creative genius to put it slightly (the way he crafts stories and just generally writes is. so fucking inspiring to me. like god he is Everything)

i highly recommend the first game tho, its one of my all time favorites and so worth the time 💜

[trancylovecraft]

Heya there, llove your writting ! So for the fic/fics of your choosing : Fanfic Ask game 2, 3, 7, 8, 11 and 15 ?

EEEE THANKS! I'll choose my demon slayer fic YSIK since its my favourite and the longest :>

i also went off and gave a few good long answers so SORRY :( I got carried away.

i also get kinda dark tho, so be prepared.

2: What scene did you first put down?

First scene I ever visualised and wrote fully in my head was probably the ending, Though I'm not gonna spoil it ;)

3: What’s your favorite line of narration? (LONG RAMBLE INCOMING!!)

"Whatever, The sun was always too bright for her anyways." (CHP12)

I LOVE this line a lot mostly because after everything built up on the previous chapters, This is the line that solidifies [F/N]'s apathy after losing her faith and her hopelessness, Giving up entirely.

The sun has always represented and symbolised goodness and hope. ESPECIALLY IN JAPANESE MYTHOLOGY where the queen of the kami is Amaterasu.

Coupled with the fact that the sun is very important in KNY because its the driving force that kills the demons. In YSIK demons are symbolic of depression (ESPECIALLY KOKU) and [F/N] becoming one would basically be representing her suicide if she ever did become one in the future ( ;) )

[F/N] also grew up in the Sunlight village where all her siblings were killed as children, Giving her a distaste for the sun.

So basically the Sun represents Hope, Faith/Religion, Redemption and Virtue.

[F/N] saying that the sun was too bright for her and turning away to the moon (The celestial body that the demons, The ones that represent depression, love.) Is basically her way of saying nothing matters anymore and her turn away from Inari, Especially after this line comes after her failing suicide attempt.

Its just her way of saying "I'm done, I don't care anymore" and falling further into depression (Which is the water she would currently be drowning in, But that symbolism is not apart of the ask so ill stop here-)

7: Where did the title come from?

"You, Shibou. I, Kokoro"

Shibou is the last part of Kokushibo's name, The main antag. The kanji that its suppose to mean is "Death".

"Kokoro" however comes from the fact that the reader was originally my OC! Though I decided to just turn her into a reader for the fic, Her original name was "Kokoro Fujimori"

Kokoro in japanese means "Heart, Mind, Soul." So the full title is meant to mean in some way: "You, Death. I, Soul." since heart and mind is suppose to be representing Mitsuri and Shinobu, Soul is what is representing reader and thus the meaning of the title :D

8: Did any real people or events inspire any part of it? (I GET A TEENY WEENY BIT DARK HERE, SO SKIP IF U DONT WANNA HEAR ME TALK ABOUT DEPRESSION/SUICIDE)

This fic is actually based off of me and my own experiences, [F/N] being both a reader insert and a self insert.

I write this fic because I have no other outlet to speak about my deteriorating mental condition due to certain circumstances, It's really special to me.

Everything [F/N] experiences in this fic is taken from me. From being unable to get out of bed to under-eating, Apathy and loss of faith to suicidal thoughts is from muah. She's basically my mouthpiece to talk about the nitty-gritty of depression (though keep in mind, ive never been diagnosed with anything)

11: What do you like best about this fic?

I like the characters and the development ALOT :D! I like the relationships im writing especially with Mitsuri and [F/N] as well as Akaza. The way ive got them down in my head is going really well and I think they compliment each other a lot :>

15: What did you learn from writing this fic?

Continuing on with Q8, It helped me out and is a really good outlet. It's also taught me a lot about my writing and how I can improve since this is my first longfic lol!

Thanks a lot :D!

-Trancy M. Lovecraft

[rhythmicjester]

hey um i saw that livepost of u playing arc 4... r u doing okay? ToT idk if uve gotten to the end END scene yet and i dont wanna spoil you but i just wanna say it gets. fucked up. i mean all the ending scenes are fucked up but this one especially... so yea good luck >_<;

also ummm weird question but like what is ur name? cus ive subconsciously just been calling u "jester" but i feel like i should ask ^^;

im okay ^w^ i hope i didnt worry you @o@ thanks for checking in tho the gesture is much appreciated X3 everything in that thread is with a hearty /pos!!! XDD n yeaaaa im gonna take a break before the part i assume u are inferring to. probably gonna wait until after new years to resume XP

and my name is twilight!!! jester is fine too tho its kinda a cute name XD ive been meaning to do an intro post but I KEEP FORGETTING... and/or getting distracted with other stuff. maybe ill make a quick messy one tonite o.0 i have a fandom banner from my twitter i could use in it as well hrrrmmmmm

[narwhalandchill]

FINALLY FINISHED 4.1 AQ!!!!! (General thoughts also Lot of childe thoughts + 4.1 spoilers obvi and 4.2 leaks warning, LONG)

ok OK OK that was actually insane holy fuck. i was mad initially when childe lacking voicelines in 4.1 leaked but like bro was Still a central character im cool! im cool! keep it up in 4.2!!!!

FIRSTLY. i was fucking right i KNEW the oratrice was ALWAYS onto childe being connected to the primordial sea through 'it' GOD the sheer fucking amount of "theories" i saw that were like oh its all just arlecchinos machinations nothing abyssal whale is an easter egg (?) childes poor mood is bc hes drugged with sinthe by arle (??????) etc etc etc. eat my fucking ass. i saw this shit coming YEARS ago i knew i fucking knew.

honestly its just like my dearest ajax to minmax his K/D ratio to the point that he becomes the murder weapon to a case that started when he was like 5 like what a legend. he is so talented. 🥰🥰🥰🥰

im still highkey on the copium camp that the leaked humanoid phase of the ptahur fight wouldnt literally be childe tho. unironically mostly bc i think its simply a crime against him to let foul legacys visual design AND ptahurs whale design serve cunt that hard only to do the ugliest most generic possible rectangle shaped dark armor guy for A Boss Fight. Like cmon. the purple cyclops look with the flowing galaxy cape and fluffy collar was The Shit. give us extra galaxy effect pastel purple water-y polar star motif-y foul legacy design for childes magical girl powerup not That. tho if childes only gonna look ugly before he asserts his claim over the whales power and then gets a cunty powerup then all is forgiven 🥰

AND WE SAW THE WHALE I WAS LITERALLY GIDDY WATCHING THE CUTSCENE. knew it was coming bc i spoiled myself on purpose by watching it on yt i Had to see it but. ITS SO GOOD. God. and then 4.2 we will fight them both??? & the boss title is "devourer of the stars"???? like its so fucking abysspilled and real i feel like a starving middle ages peasant being fed from the royal banquet table ive waited SO LONG. foul legacy is called devouring deep and 'it' is Litetally titled devourer. this isnt a fucking coincidenceee im in love . WILF i said what i said

anyway i do agree that in terms of lore implications i dont think its unrealistic at all for it and its will to overwhelm ajax temporarily like that thing is the devourer of stars which. Might i remind people literally means devouring fate in the world of genshin and constellations. a world ending entity. but also at the same time this might be me being insane and abysspilled (always looking for a reason for apologism yk) but like. theres no direct confirmation either way whether ptahurs intentions with childe are really malicious at all. he awakened it, theyre linked and its calling for him and sure thats bad for fontainians' projected life expectancy but we cant assume much else. i mean childe was in the deep sea he might be snezhnayan so immune to anti french bathwater but bro couldve been drowning maybe the whale helped out a pal. and the music in the cutscene was more wonder than terror too? fanon guys are just coping bc they dont want childe to get worse when thats just much sexier Trust (she says, overtaken by constant paranoia that somehow theyll pull a 180 and damsel-ify him with no actual narrative weight or satisfaction for his arc ahahaha)

(but like me when i havent read tusk of monoceros caeli item desc and understood that the all-devouring desire to crush everything in his path like the solipsism represented by the image of a whale cruising through the celestial heights is very explicitly stated to be a part of himself childe chooses to gleefully embrace do not fucking try me you illiterates. sorry i got emotional for a sec back to 4.1)

AND LIKE NO I DID NOT MISS THAT NEUVILLETTE DID NEVER IN FACT CLAIM PTAHURS SENTENCE UPON FONTAINE WAS UNJUSTIFIED. JUST THAT IT WAS TOO HARSH. so like listen listen listen. (pulls up my abyss is justified the gods are false the sky is fake so bringing ruin upon the world in the greatest sin against an artificial system is actually making the sinner the one delivering heavenly justice---- conspiracy whiteboard) ANYWAY point is childe tartaglia ajax should get to torch celestia and im going to kiss him on the mouth when he does. No one @ me. but actually neuvillette genuinely APOLOGIZED for overturning ptahurs authority to deliver its sentence. im gonna read into this so hard it might be reaching but who am i if not behaving down bad horrendously about the abyss and the prospect of a cosmic eldritch entity shattering celestias world order into pieces,?? this is my Brand

act III has so much hate but i thought it was fine SJSJSKSJFKFIDKFK it did what it set out to do and it certainly isnt as interesting as act IV but it did So much of the foundational work for the next act and managed to work well enough. it got a bit repetitive so like no it wasnt perfect at all but idk when u go in with the right mindset its perfectly competent. but i can see it feel horrible when u Really just wanna get to the action parts so like its fine if ppl dislike it jsjajsk not too pressed either way

anyway i find it so cute how many people are reacting to travelers dreams of childes pov as this like omg theyre in sync and not like. An explicit confirmation that visions are mass surveillance tools p much 💀💀💀💀 like its not even ON HIM and he can still be tracked how is this endearing im so lost JSFFJSJSJ

honestly beyond the obvious childe brainrot its hard to even go off about just any specific character bc EVERYONE got it so good. chlorinde dodged the sara allegations im SO fucking happy for her!!! even if it wasnt that much its already far off from that travesty!!! her and wrios dynamic is so fucking funny i adore them and wasnt expecting it at all.

wrio is fucking GREAT! i absolutely lived for every single line of dialogue he had like mans literally the funniest person in fontaine. silver powercreep. but not just that bc hes actually so fucking good and interesting and intriguing and i loved the overall role he played. the whole power play he did w lyney and that entire confrontation played so well with both his and lyneys character im just. this was a certified banger. the house of hearth sibs were all great and lyneys characterization had So much depth and nuance i really liked the way he wasnt dropping his and lynettes backstory in 4.0 just to trauma dump but that it was all actual setup for his minor/major breakdown during act IV and that payoff was so worth it!!! arle chiding him for his pride too. listen to your dad lyney.

speaking of Whom.

oh my god oh my god arle arle arle. this woman had me actually fucking blushing like. Her ENERGY. The Poise. the Threat. the Pressure. the veneer of perfectly conducted civil friendliness that feels more threatening than if she just put a knife to my neck (which. she could. id thank her)??? how shes genuinely LIVID at furina and about the prophecy and just kept pressing at her?????? no woman in this goddamn game has had an effect like this on me i feel so weak im such a fucking dyke oh my god. HER VOICE. HER FUCKING VOICE. EVERY SENTENCE OUT OF HER MOUTH I WAS EATING IT UP. that like. idk how to even call it that like dry breathy quality to her voice is just?????? i was transfixed i was obsessed i was hypnotized.

and ofc she didnt really gaf about childe much SJAJSKSJFKSKSKDKD but like unironically funniest fucking mental image from this AQ was the concept of if arlecchino ever somehow got arrested in another nation CHILDE would be her attorney like. 😭😭😭😭😭😭 HELP (logically ik he would do fine lmao hes smart and literally feeds his ego by being good at his job you guys are just so fucking rude comparing him to 6d chess zhongli in liyue AQ. thats zhongli being too galaxy brain not anyone else being dumb)

honestly i love love love this fucked up strict but seemingly truly genuine in her own fucked up way parental figure that she appears to be?? like this isnt redeeming her this is making her interesting as fuck and i do love that. the fact that shes generally very reasonable and collected but that you can just Feel the danger lurking underneath is literally So attractive i might keel over.

and like FINALLY a nation where its not all the fatuis fault!!! well it is all childes fault (so proud of him. thats my man!!) but you get what i mean GSJSKDK. arlecchino actually offering up her cooperation at the end just feels so refreshing and nice like ahhh. feels good feels organic.

so. neuvillette is the reincarnated hydro sovereign. whos surprised. (silence) yeah fucking thought so. honestly neuvi was both incredibly interesting and good but also his clueless moments of not picking up on jokes and banter are So autistic like if i hadnt already pulled him by the point i started doing act IV i wouldve the second he started sharing his autism diagnosis with us. so like im ecstatic to have him both on my main and NA alt actually.

ALSO. Confirmed that gnoses are based on stolen authority from the sovereigns. as a scalie enthusiast i Always had a hunch sth like this was up but having it confirmed is fucking excellent. and like it feels very much like furina/focalors (r they separate ppl or not? Huh?? is the gnosis in the oratrice?) r gonna allow neuvillette to tackle the bathwater problem by surrendering the authority over hydro back to its rightful heir n thats prolly gonna be a part of how fontaine dodges the prophecy. but its still very hmmmmmm

sigewinnes traitor moment actually caught me off guard it was SO funny. like she was actually fooling us i loved that. sure she always had good intentions and everything but still iconic. in general just how wrio and gang outplayed us in the fortress of merupide was great like it just really emphasizes how bro Runs the place for real for real and it was excellent. the massive ship was kind of out of left field tho. inb4 ptahur just crushes that thing anyway lmaooooo

theres probably more still but uh this is already too long JSJSKSKDK anyway yes i did enjoy acts III and IV very much how did you notice. sorry for the length of this crazed frenzy but not sorry actually. it feels so nice to get fed finally. im so hype for 4.2.

edit: wait i forgor furina. honestly im not gonna lie i was too mesmerized by arlecchino to pay that much attention to her so sorry about that but like GAJSKDJDKDK she was great too!!!