glacialheart

[puccafangirl]

So I just came across this other model sheet for Fidget that I've never seen before and omg the one with him frowning like that in particular is cracking me up! XD

[espresso-ships]

You, me and the stars 🌃

When your girlfriend got the "Lets go stargazing at 3am out in the cold" autism - Ágata, probably

AIGHT this might be my favorite drawing yet?? 😭

I love them so so much I might cry 😭💕 THEY LOVE EACH OTHER Y'ALL!!! Real love right hereee 🫂

I had some Adhd hyper-focus and spent like 5 hours straight drawing this LOL (plus I wrote on my book for like 1 hour too YAYY!!)

If you want to support my art - Comments and reblogs/shares means a lot! 🙏

Taglist 💕

@mashedpotatosinacup @jokerislandgirl32 @tireddovahkiin 

@sharkruss @stoneshipper 

@sheepie-self-ships @goopships @emmamagorobisgirlfriend 

@sunflawyer @literally-just-there @fomybeloved

Click here to be added!

[spookykoolkat]

the red j.m. | chapter three

CHAPTER THREE: PROTECTON

series masterlist | main masterlist

previous chapter | next chapter

pairings: older!joel miller x plus sized!younger!reader

chapter summary: it's been three weeks since you decided to stay in jackson and you realized that your hatred and irritation caused by the man who let you live under his roof may be more than just that.

warnings: age gap (joel is 57, reader is turning 26), inappropriate thoughts, creepy joel if you squint, fluff/nicer joel, and a small breakthrough with joel, MDNI!

wc: 5k

na: HELLOOOOOO omg okay here is the third chapter of the red, my new passion project that i'm currently in love with. i have so many more one shots and ideas that i'm writing, including a request i hope to finish up before next week! i hope everyone is loving this series so far and i hope that you show ur love by reblogging, sharing you thoughts in a comment and liking :P i hope u luv this just as much as i do and hope y'all look forward to more chapters to come! (and oneshots and fics and stuff LOL) ps all love to my plus size girls i love u guys.

THREE WEEKS LATER

YOU

as the days went on, you found yourself falling into the routine of the world you live in now. you decided to stay, and it’s something you hadn’t second guessed either. part of it was nice, living somewhat normally, as normal as you could given the circumstances. It almost felt like a weight off of your shoulders. you could actually get rest most nights without the threat, some nights still being nerve wracking. 

it was your anxiety that kept you awake, your thoughts of depression and paranoia created a difficult defeat. It was hard. and you struggled, just not in front of anyone. your father wasn’t the best father, but one piece of advice you took from him was to never let anyone feel like they have to take care of you, always handle your issues alone because quote unquote, they’ll just throw it back in your face.

the deal was, you get a job while you take a few classes in order to take patrol routes, and the job was the local clothing store that did trades and fixer uppers. you didn’t know much about sewing or making clothes, you just remembered watching your mother sew holes back up after you skinned your knee trying to get away. 

ellie attended school, doing the best to get the education she needed before deciding what her role will be in this society. yours is being a merchant apparently, but you complied. it was money, at least whatever was comparable to money, and you needed it to get your own place. living with joel and ellie was fine, but you realized it was just you and joel most of the time. ellie managed to make her own space in the garage and joel let her, helped her even. he figured it’d be nice to have two different spaces for one another. 

he felt the same about you. but didn’t ever tell you of course. he figured you already had enough on your plate for him not to breathe down your neck until you leave. you saw it anyways though because joel could not help the way his face said more than he needed.

he was used to being alone, until he met tess, then he got used to having someone there and accommodated to living with another person. he hadn’t gotten used to you yet. in the kitchen wearing shorts and a long shirt as you made breakfast, for the three of you until joel would say that ellie was already gone. he would eat his plate quickly, saying a quick thank you and not saying any words as he does the dishes you just made. 

you would tell him you could wash them, that he didn’t have to, but he insisted you didn’t. not with his words of course, he’d just rush to do them before you could finish your plate. you didn’t know what to make of him yet.  

“i got your plate, you’re gonna be late for work,” he would say, taking your cup and plate to the sink to wash. he’d always be right though, you were going to be late on days you cooked in the mornings. but he just seemed to want to be out of your way and as far away as possible from you. you even asked tommy how to go about living with his brother. 

“best advice i can give you is to just do your own thing. he won’t pay no mind to you, like livin’ with a damn cat i tell ya,” he said playfully, but something in you made you believe it wholeheartedly. he truly was like a cat. quiet, reserved, does his own thing, and takes care of himself. you figured, how hard could it be? until actually living with him. now, you’re kind of bothered by the lack of interactions. you were here, you might as well get to know the people around you but he didn’t make it that simple. you didn’t either at first, so you’re patient. 

but then you got in your head. you don’t need to let anyone in, you aren’t here to make friends or share dark secrets. being here made you gain small hope, but it didn’t last once you started thinking again. there wasn’t a way for you to have people in your life and keep them safe at the same time. you realized that everything you had to fight for and protect, you failed. 

but you weren’t the only one still adjusting and battling themselves. joel put up a wall between him and everyone he’s ever interacted with. it was for his safety, and now ellie’s. 

sometimes he’d be surprised by you in the wide living room with a book in your hands after work. it wasn’t that rare you constantly met him in the living room after his shift was up, because by the time he was coming back home you were getting up for work. sometimes vice versa, and sometimes, very rarely, would you and joel be leaving the house at the same time. but still, after almost a month of being in joel’s presence there wasn’t more than 20 words exchanged each day. 

joel didn’t bother to get to know you, he didn’t ask you about anything and didn’t even ask you about your plans to stay or not. he just didn’t want you asking questions either. plus, he figured everything he knew about you was all that he needed to know. 

you would think joel would like to know who was living under his roof, but truth be told he hardly knows the people he calls neighbors. to him it wasn’t his priority to meet new people and indulge in normal life activities like watching a movie or going to the bar they hold in the town. he molded perfectly into the role he and others gave him, which was to protect and hunt. to do his part to contribute to the new making of jackson’s society. in joel’s mind, he wasn’t in jackson to make buddies and go on dates, and he wasn't prowling for anyone either. 

his mind was on survival, and calculating if every decision he makes will heighten the chances of him and ellie, now you, surviving. he wasn’t interested in the get togethers people invited him to, he couldn’t care for the annual small pot luck they have in jackson, all he cared about was making sure jackson stayed safe, that all three of you stayed safe.

so, he put off making friends and love, and focused on ellie. he didn’t need anyone else knowing him and his life anymore than they already do, and he didn’t need a stranger trying to pry his deepest and darkest secrets out of him. 

the thing is, you wanted to know him. even if you were still unsure of him, jackson, yourself─you could admit that he did his part in making you nervous, drawing you to something. you still had a dislike for him though. you couldn’t tell which feeling overpowered which.

jackson was bigger than you thought.. there were at least two or three subdivisions of houses, a school, a church, one bar, one clothing store, one hardware supply, and a small park that was really two swings and an aluminum slide. maria told you as she gave the tour that it took a while to build up, but with time came something amazing. something the QZ or the fireflies could never achieve, it was peaceful. everyone relied on each other, everyone trusted each other. except for three people—the three people who live under joel’s roof. that’s what the three of you bonded the most over, the fact that you all have trust issues. 

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

you noticed joel a lot more over the weeks. he was a grumpy man, a man who if he could, he’d get a newspaper with his coffee—straight black, and read outside on his patio as the sun rose. by himself, alone. how he wanted. and you understood of course, you know how it is to want your solitude. but, you also couldn’t help how eager you were to talk to him. surprised at every small good morning, or have a good day you get once and while from him. 

he was sharp and cold with most people, offering a hand to compensate, and helping those who need it. joel realized after a while it’s better to make acquaintances rather than enemies in such a tight knit community, a community that relies on the people within. he couldn’t break that cycle, so he was friendly with those who he got to know. 

you noticed how much stuff he would bring back on his patrolling days. a box full of female hygiene products, a box full of new clothes, or more ammo. you watched from the window as he looked around to see if anyone was looking, and would go to the shed he built that was in the backyard of the house. you wondered what he was doing to get all of these things, but you never brought it up to anyone. 

It wasn’t your business.

you didn’t bother to pry, and to be your usual curious self and ask him about it. you knew he’d shut the conversation down before it even started, and it wasn’t worth it to you. you did make a mental note to bring it up to him eventually. 

a small part of you liked him though. despite the mystery, the coldness, the selfishness, the rudeness, you actually liked joel because he reminded you of you. a small part would be an understatement. you always seemed to be looking for joel. whether it was downstairs, in ellie’s space, or in public. constantly wondering where he was, or if he was looking at you. whether you realized it now or not, his presence brought a certain comfort to you.

you volunteered in the kitchen serving dinner from time to time, and when you did you fought hard to not stare at the miller brothers walking in with ellie. but, ellie didn’t make it hard to acknowledge their presence and notice them.. joel would just nod in your direction, you’d give a small nod back and get back to making plates. you practically fought yourself to not glance over at him, just to make sure he was still sitting in his usual seat next to ellie. and when you lost, you’d look up to his seat just to see his eyes peering over his cup at you.

It was an odd dynamic that left you wanting more from him. you wanted to learn more about him when he had moments of vulnerability, which was only twice over the course of your stay.you only knew he was from austin and was a contractor before everything started. you wanted to pry more, to know him, to know what makes him smile and laugh.  and if you were going to learn about joel, it wasn't going to be through ellie or tommy, or even maria.

you wanted the accomplishment of getting to finally know joel all by yourself, it seemed like a challenge to you. everyone talked, people would ask you where you stayed here in jackson when a local notices that you’re a new face and would end up looking like they saw a ghost when the words, ‘i’m a friend of tommy’s, i’m stayin’ with his brother,’ came out of your mouth. he had a reputation obviously, but you didn’t know the extent. everyone knew joel miller and the little girl, and joel knew you’d get wind of the things people have said and feel about him. 

he just hoped that that’s all you got wind of. 

you were so confused at this new and sudden urge to be around someone all of the time, but it’s happening with joel even if you never act on it. you weren't going to force yourself around someone just because you wanted him near. 

you wanted him to be the one to break first. to talk to you first and ask about you, even act like you exist a little more than he did now. you needed him to feel this way about you, and more. you weren’t going to get hurt, and you weren’t going to let it happen by the commune’s biggest asshole. 

but then you would come back to reality. you realized joel miller had absolutely zero interest in you. not as a friend, not as a person━to you, he saw you as a temporary thing. and you would remember that the feeling of close proximity to joel and knowing who he was wasn’t going to make your life easier. It was a constant battle with yourself, fighting your vulnerability and settling for being the second hard ass in jackson. 

⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒☆━━━━━━━━━━━☆⭒

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 13TH, 2024.

YOU

it was late at night when joel came home from his interchanging shifts with other people in jackson. you were humming to yourself  as you washed the pile of dishes that were stacked when joel walked in. with everyone trying to get settled, it was hectic. finding a new balance with being the new addition to the home, getting into a regular flow of things. so when you got home from work, you cleaned up as much as you could without moving things around even though you were desperate to. as long as you were here, this still wasn’t your house to mess with. 

you stayed in places here and there, a shelter in waco, texas when your parents traveled there for safety from the QZ, a stranger’s underground hideout the first two years of it, many more people’s homes and abandoned buildings and escaping from QZ’s around the states.but you never failed to tidy things up while you stayed, you couldn’t shake it. you respected your surroundings and were grateful for the people who did extend their hand to you, even if they hurt you and made you regret not killing them.

joel walked in with a hard face and an unhappy sigh, looking towards the open kitchen and seeing you in a long sleeve shirt that’s risen on one side where your waistband carries the old walkman, your hair in a lazy put together bun—a part of him couldn’t look away if he wanted to. still trying to get used to this. 

he had to be honest, he found it hard living in the same space as you. he noticed you getting a bit more hopeful these days, not looking as angry as he does every day, and talking more. not to him, but he watched from afar. always had an eye on you even when he wasn’t around. he made sure tommy looked after you, maria, he even made ellie make sure you were okay. making sure you weren’t completely out of your mind. not more than usual, at least. 

he had something for you. he didn’t know if it was true, if he could be this far gone that he couldn’t stand to be around you because he wanted to take care of you in ways you would’ve never thought of? he hated that you made him feel like he wanted to protect you. he also hated the fact that you could never make him hate you. 

you didn’t notice him of course, you continued to scrub and wash as he came up behind you and tapped you on the shoulder to tell you he was home, sending you to flinch and sigh. you removed your headphones and let them rest on your neck as you turn the knob of the sink. 

“fuck!,” you said, putting a wet hand to your forehead as you tried to breathe in, “why are you always doin’ that? asshole.” 

“watch your mouth,” he tried and you had to stifle a laugh as he plucked a beer can from the fridge and left the kitchen area to sit in the living room. it was always a little funny to see him irritated because of you, you couldn’t lie to yourself. 

“bite me.” you spit, putting your headphones back on and rolling your eyes. 

joel felt so wrong. your responses shouldn’t leave him wanting to hear more of your sharpness. he shouldn’t be curious as to what you sounded like when you laughed hard enough. he shouldn’t want to watch your every movement. 

you were lost, confused, trying to find your way and here he was watching you like a creep from his spot on the couch. he would’ve loved to turn on a tv right now, ignore his instincts and feelings and turn into whatever show was on. all he has now is a dull radio ellie traded with the neighbors for, and he decided to put that on instead. it was a bit rare to find music, good music even. 

by the time he found a soft 60s song, you were done and wiping up the area before drying your arms. you decided to grab a beer yourself, cringing at the dark bottle, and making your way to sit on the couch across from joel. he watched as you lifted the hem of your shirt to wrap around the cap of the bottle, twisting it off successfully. he couldn’t help but notice the exposed skin that was pressing into your black shorts. 

“i uh, never thanked you or tommy. for saving me, bringing me here. i’m just, it’s a lot to get used to. i still don’t know if i’ll stay,” you broke the silence and took a swig of the beer, downing it quickly. 

“don’t thank me, thank tommy.” he said coldly and looked at the burning wood in the fireplace against the wall. It was silent for a bit while joel’s eyes wandered from you to a nearby window, watching the snow fall.  you couldn’t help but think about it, and before you knew it the words were coming out of your mouth. 

“why did you want to leave me there?” you looked to him with the beer in your lap, sitting criss crossed on the couch and your fingertips tapping at the sweating beverage. he looked to you once and looked down and around, sighing. 

“it ain’t personal. tommy and maria, they don’t take people in like that. it shocked me, is all. i just didn’t trust ya,” he admitted and drank his beer, getting comfortable. 

“do you trust me now?” you asked and he kept his gaze on the floor. you didn’t expect a different response from him. 

you kind of sat there, stilled and quietly listening to the music that comes from the radio. he doesn’t watch you anymore, he just drinks his beer until he finishes and lays there with his forearm over his eyes. a part of it feels normal, like coming home from a long day at work and cracking open a beer, going to sleep after and repeat. 

“I’m trying, you know. trying to get my own place here, and work and make connections so I’ll be out of your hair.” you defended even though there was just silence. you felt bad, imposing on a man who clearly wants to be left alone. but he could be less of an asshole.

“I’m not tryna rush you out of here.” is all he says and you notice for the first time you’re actually having a conversation with joel miller. or the equivalent to a conversation. 

“It feels like you don’t want me here. I’d ask tommy and maria for a room but, they’re a married couple and she looks like she’s about to pop. feels wrong to invade their space like that.” you said and drank your coldish beer, not enjoying the foam it created. 

he sighs, sitting up from his slumped position and looking at you while your eyes are on the bottle in your lap. he didn’t speak immediately, so when his eyes trailed over you and your bare legs you could feel the heat from his gaze. It made you squirm a bit, your legs pressing together again as he makes your stomach flutter. you couldn’t help but look at the hand that grips his bottle. 

“It ain’t that either. you’re just,” he sighed again, half lying, rubbing the crease between his eyebrows, “you’re unpredictable, is all. don’t ever know what that mind of yours is thinking, if you’re thinkin’ of hurtin’ yourself or if this is all a trap still.”  he confesses and you form your lips into a straight line. 

you stay silent for a moment, before meeting his gaze. “I don’t want to hurt myself, joel. or you, or ellie. I have no reason to. I just, when you found me i was alone. and i like being alone, don’t get me wrong. but it gets… scary. depressing. I mean I’ve lost everyone, i’ve killed anyone i ever loved because of those fucking things. I had no one who cared if i was alive or dead anymore, and it just got to me.” 

“and i know everyone’s gone through the same thing nd more, it’s just,” you huffed and moved your eyes down to your bottle, “I’ve prided myself in being alone, that i don’t need anyone.I’ve shut everyone out and been so mean to everyone. but for what?” you asked rhetorically. 

you thought about it a lot. what was the point of trying to kill everyone before they killed you first? what life are you living if you aren’t trying to make the best of it? these were questions you asked yourself daily, thinking about how many people you’ve scared off because you felt they were too good for you. too kind, too caring, everything you wanted and needed you sabotaged because in your eyes, you’d rather get the blow over sooner than later. 

“your protection. and it works, it’s jus’  lonely.” he said, stealing the words from your mouth. 

“It’s lonely.” you repeat after him. 

for a moment, you felt yourself warming up to joel, understanding him more than you thought you would. solitude was something the two of you appreciated, but were tired of. having joel and ellie around made you feel less alone, like there were other people who understood how you felt. it’s why you liked talking to ellie so much, she reminds you of yourself when you were younger. she made you feel like maybe there was a chance to make things better for her, like joel wanted. you understood why he didn’t want to throw her in the world of being a protector at so young, she was just a kid. she deserved a chance to be just that. someone like that, someone who has fought and protected themselves and other people for so long, deserves a chance to be the ones being protected. 

“where were you when it happened?” you asked, a new song coming on the radio. you figured maybe now that there was conversation happening, you could try to squeeze your way into his mind even if it’s for thirty seconds.

“bailin’ my brother out of jail. you remember?” he asked. 

“yeah, i was like, playing with my dog. then it was like explosions and crashes and cars. it didn’t take my dad long to start boarding up the windows and doors. but yeah, i remember.” you said and he shook his head, wanting to say something but holding back. he paused, then spoke.

“I’m sorry about your family.” he said and you gave a tight smile, thanking him. 

“I’m sure they’d be proud of you. survivin’ this long. It ain’t for the weak.” he said and that you agree on. you would’ve never made it had you been softer, or allowed yourself to be scared. you couldn’t be though. the two of you sat in silence as the static poured through the song, comfortable, together. he broke the silence first. 

“I found some old cassette tapes in the house when we first got here, if you want them. ain’t got much use for em.” he said, standing up as your eyes followed him. you grew a smile, and he was watching you find joy in little things like old music. 

“yeah, yeah of course.” you said and set the half empty beer bottle on the coffee table, standing and following him to where the cassette tapes presumably are. he ends up leading you upstairs, hitting left at the corner where you turned right all of the time, your doors were down the hall, directly across from each other. 

“I stored em’ in case. I kept everything i found in here, never know when i’ll need it.” he said, and you smiled. he was actually being a softie right now, as soft as he’d get you supposed. 

you appreciated it. more than he knew because you didn’t know how often he’d get this gentle.to a lot of people, this was just an act of kindness. but joel miller is not kind, and you wondered why he was being so nice to you all of the sudden. even if he was being snappy and short with you, he was trusting you to be in his solitary area, at least that’s the way you saw it.

he looked disarmed even though you knew he had a gun pressed into his back, and he looked comfortable. at ease, like he wasn’t expecting impending doom for once.

“It’s called being a hoarder, joel.” he narrowed his eyes on you before going into his nightstand and taking out around five tapes. Donna Summer. Beastie Boys. The Fugees. Bob Dylan. Prince. 

“I love Prince.” you said with a small smile as you grabbed the tapes from him, looking through and inspecting them. you remembered your mother playing his 1999 album throughout the house when you were a small kid. It gave you a bit of nostalgia, and warmed your heart at the distant thought of your mother. It meant more to you than it meant to joel, and he could see it. joel was actually enjoying the fact that you appreciated this niche gesture for you. 

“thank you, joel. I think Queen and Etta James will be grateful for a break.” you joked and the corner of his mouth tugged softly into a resistant smile. still better than no smile. joel glanced at the clock and noticed the big hand hit one, remembering how tired he was all of the sudden. or maybe more so acknowledging the fact that this is the most you and he have talked in a bit. 

“you know you can ask me for anything, right? I mean, you know,” he struggled with the words but with your encouraging eyes, he had no problem continuing, “I’ll do what i can for the two of ya,” he said somewhat kindly, referring to ellie as well.

you wondered now what he truly thought of you. if he still saw you as a burden, a threat, or just someone he lives with. you also noticed he wasn’t too good at expressing his feelings, he wasn’t a visibly emotional person. maybe he really was just too desensitized to everything around him.

“I don’t want to be a bother, i’ve been okay.” you said as you held the tapes with grip. 

“you don’t bother me,” he confessed, “anything you need, a’right?” he said with sure eyes, needing confirmation back from you. now you really couldn’t get a read on him. this was what sucked the most to you. you didn’t want to say it, but he was so bipolar with you. with everyone you saw him interact with, he was just short tempered and selfish. it never changed, he was mean to everyone and anyone who was near. 

but with you, he just avoided you. and when he would come near, he was either angry or neutral. it was confusing to say the least, whenever the time came for the two of you to engage, it was always a surprise at which way the conversation led. It’s like you were able to get a read on him when he interacted with anyone else but yourself.

“yeah, anything.” you noticed you were more breathless than you intended to sound, so you cleared your throat, and averted his eyes.

you realized you stood in his room with a t-shirt as a dress basically, alone with the door shut. It made you nervous, and as your eyes examined the room just to fall on his bed, it made you wonder what it would feel like to be next to him as he slept. you bet it felt warm, cozy, safe. safe in his arms, held away from the world. but then you felt crazy. you don’t even know the guy and you’re thinking about sleeping with him? what happened to collectively hating joel miller?!

you didn’t notice the way he was looking at you until your eyes worked their way up to his, a small blush forming on your face as he basically caught you checking him out. but he didn’t look like he noticed, he seemed too dazed by you to notice you were even looking at him. 

“I should go to bed. thank you again for these, joel.” you smiled sleepily, breaking the small silence. his gaze went back to normal, you seemingly saw the darkness in his eyes fade as his eyes locked on yours again. he looked softer. 

“yeah, me too, and you’re welcome. I’ll see you in the mornin’,” he trailed off, you just nodded and awkwardly shifted out of the room, releasing a breath you were holding.  you finally felt like you could breathe again, like the weight of his gaze was suffocating you.

that night you fell asleep with your headphones on, listening to Protection by Donna Summer, and thinking of joel. 

[shadowdianne]

Twenty questions for fic writers

(I guess I still am that xd let's see)

thank you for the tag love @waknatious

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Uhhh, this one will always be tricky lol; not every fic I ever wrote is on a03 as I did a lot of posting here that I considered too short to be posted back in a03 -i bothered y'all enough whenever I posted the fic batches there with those fics that were longer than... I think my inner rule was 1k?- so even if in reality I think the total sum between my two pseuds is close to 500 and something some of the old fics got deleted when i cleaned up shop and then there are more that are somewhat lost in here. So, let's just say that I have a ton of those visible on a03 and there's a bunch more that are, as my name suggests, in the shadows :P

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

Again, tricky question xd But working with the numbers I currently can see and are visible for those that would want to check... 1,259,402 That doesn't sound right. heh *shrugs*

Edit: Ah, I think the reason why the number sounds weird is because the last time I did this question I still had like 15 or so I've ever since deleted. Plus some others so, again, the number is decieving.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

*Slight correction; wrote for* majority would be SQ as we know. Sprinkled with a little bit of SC, Shannara Chronicles, Rizzles... but the main ship and therefore fandom was SQ

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I've decided to not look into those stats xD Sorry. Last time i got this ask I did it and it only reinforced the little burn out gnome of how I wasn't good enough; my works were read and I was requested prompts long enough to know I was somewhat liked on some obscure basis but I never had that much luck on the kudos department. I believe that the fics at the time I last checked were SC, maaaybe Sabrina (?) -the one vaguely smutty pertaining Madame Zelda was uploaded there I believe(????) so it might have been that one, and some other one that wasn't about the main ship I wrote for. (the 100 one maybe?)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Back when I wrote and posted I did, yes. If at some point I missed a comment it might have been because I was swamped at the time with uni and work and I might have been far too focused on getting out the next prompt batch I was working on at the time but 99% of the time I responded to every single comment. I appreciate the feedback aspect of fandom, be that a reblog, share, comment or kudo or whatever other form and for those that commented, i hope you know that as much as I loved to tease you and generally torment you with my purple prose, i appreciated every second spent on leaving a comment.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

*snorts* I have a bunch. I don't remember all of them like I used to but I think that I liked the ones I did back when we were loving the concept of a Dark Swan and I kept on having both Emma and Regina battle each other in the middle of Storybrook. There are a couple in which I know I killed either Emma or Regina in a very fantastical way :P Oh, and then there's the one I did with... was it Emma? Dying at the hospital. One that was an answer to Del's prompt that I decided to focus on the whole concept of the hospital bed. I think that one, for a variety of reasons, is the angstiest in terms of how it was thought off and written.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Uh. I honestly don't think I have a factual answer there; my fics were always written as sort of small windows into the worlds presented on them. As I never quite did long format fics there was never a real "true" ending there. Dunno, does anyone remember what would they consider a happy ending from me? xd

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I did. Back when I wrote I always had a couple of trolls floating around on my tumblr inbox. I also had a couple more on the comment section but the main place was always tumblr. I sometimes shared the asks but I tended to erase the majority of them as soon as I saw them. The reason behind those asks is unfathomable to me but.... anyway xd I think i've written enough posts about how i felt about those lol.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

*snorts, again* I tend to focus on teasing. Or, I did. I think I will always prefer the concept of leaving as much as possible of the actual sexual act to the mind of the reader and just put the... frame of it if you will. I'e written pwp tho, small snippets here and there -and words of desire, that series in where i solely wrote a smutty scene based on the words I got sent- I enjoy the process of writing something that is about feelings and how can those be explored and heightened based on the scenario and situation but I always prefered, again, to be a tease about it xd

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

The only fic I've written that I think would constitute as a crossover would be the Lara Croft and Wonder Woman one. It was mostly a joke but I had fun with it. However, whereas I don't mind reading crossovers I always tended to stay away from them (Not AUs based on some other IPs tho, that's different xd). The main logic behind it was that I'm, first and foremost, worldbuild based so if I wanted to create a logical explanation for x, y, or z that alone would eat up a lot of the story itself. And I prided myself on being able to write stories under 2k or less soooooo....

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yup! But some minor ones in some of those sites that the whole thing was scrapped, comments and all and you got notified through fb groups xd Considering I've been MIA for so long I doubt anything has gotte since.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I got asked a couple of times and gave my consent to one once but I think it never went anywhere,

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I've collaborated with other fic writers ^^ (@stregaomega for example was and will always be the very fucking best) and it was awesome! But I tended to move more in the -I write one chapter and you do the next one and then I answer to that other one...- kind of scenario.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

SQ for writing I guess!

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I wrote the end of almost all of the fics that I left unfinished by the time I went byebye on the whole thing but then my fantastic burn out considered the -even today I think is quite valid- angle on how "it's been long enough since I started them so no one will want to read those." I scrapped almost all of them. I think I'll always get slightly sad about not finishing a bunch of the AU's tho. The Ministry of Hidden Stories series for example! I always loved a good Steampunk. And that other one in which Regina was basically Queen Mab. The name is eluding me. Drat. Well, that one. I had like 80 or something pages on the continuation of that one. But, *points at the beginning of this* welp.

16. What are your writing strengths?

(Also, thanks W for the acknowledgment there lol; I always wanted for the description to feel 'real' <3) As I always said; I don't think I had any. But it's true that I always enjoyed much more the in-between as W has said in her own answer there xd The descriptive moments, the movement of the character, the way they are behaving and the words they are not saying. I always found that dialogue was... harder to keep OC or to the point enough to be engaging but focusing on what one is saying and what another one is understanding based on the way they perceive the world was way much more interesting. Which resulted in loooong descriptive paragraphs lol.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

*sighs* Dialogues.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Uhm xd As someone that speaks more than two languages and has written stories in their mother tongue as well as a bunch on others.... I think I'm not entirely against doing it but I don't think it's that easy to convey a true relationship with being able to speak in more than one language. It's often used as a way of informing the reader -or in pwp bc, yknow, hot- but the linguistic side of my brain will always be at odds with that in some way xd I'm basically all for it but I think that there are ways in where it can be a little bit clunky; depending on how it's presented.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

I always doubt between Bellice (Bella and Alice from Twilight) and some lost Glee fic. And there were some from Sailor Moon and Card Captor Sakura... I think that the very first one you can find under my pseud is a Bellice one tho so let's stick with that.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Not the best but I'll always pick Metallic Ink for that question. I really had fun with the worldbuilding there and will always hate that I run out of time to basically write more for it as it was a SuperNova fic.

--

It's far too late right now to do a proper tag so I'll leave this here and return tomorrow and tag anyone I find :P

[fancymuffinparty]

2023 End of Year Update:

PSA, folks! Just want to share an end of the year announcement with you all! First off, THANK YOU to everyone who's supported my writing ventures and listened to my dumb headcanons/rants lmao! I'm grateful for all the good times and for this safe (and slightly chaotic) space!

This year was WILD for me! I advanced in my career (learned so many new things), got back into swimming (teaching and for fitness), I got married, travelled abroad for the first time ever, moved out of state (with my husband and two pups!), and although there was some *drama* sprinkled throughout, I just had to remember to be grateful for all the good things I have, like my friends and family! (Self care is important!!) As for fandom and writing shenanigans, I FINALLY finished my Resident Evil/Valeveira fic (Rejoins-Moi)!!!! That was a huge accomplishment, and I am so glad plenty of people were patient and understanding throughout the whole process lol! This year also brought back the revival of my SnK/PkPk fic, One More Tomorrow! Which I am so thrilled to also see through to completion! Again, thank you to everyone who still read and left comments on it even when it was on hiatus!! Y'all are the reason why it came back to life!!! (The porco and pieck gods had ordained it!!) Generally speaking, I got back into writing as a hobby (because i love it and it's a nice creative outlet!) and I shared some new fics! Streamline, a beruyumi fic that I've been wanting to write forever!!! Exhibition, a pkpk fic for pkpk week! loved working on it! And finally, my first Fallout-NV fic, Ars Poetica, ars belli, that is my pride and joy!! D': I even changed my url, omg! Now that 2024 is upon us, I was thinking about making a twitter/X? That way I can share my writing woes on another platform and reach a wider audience! :) I will stay on tumblr, obviously, but I wanna grow (idk if i'm wording that right lol) and spread the message of pkpk and valeveira and all my other ships (lmao) to all!! Plus it's nice to see what else is out there besides just tumblr hehehe Welp, if you made it this far, then here, have a fancy muffin! 🧁 And cheers!🎉✨🥂 See ya later, cowboys and cowgirls! Hope to see you all on twitter/X, too maybe!:) PS) I may also open my ko-fi for requests soon, too! Let me know if you're interested (or if you prefer i just keep to updating my ongoing fics lol)

[lovesick-level-up]

hey there, how are y'all doing! ^^ sorry this isn't a request ;;; but i've been SO into milgram recently & with the recent release of 'double' and everyone theorizing about mikoto, i was wondering if any of you had any thoughts on how mikoto and john are handled (especially as a system yourselves)? if y'all aren't comfortable sharing i totally understand, sorry for the sudden question ;; but i am genuinely curious to hear your perspectives on the topic, or even just on milgram in general !! yikes this got long lmao. but hope y'all are having a good day/night!

yesssssss, anon. let's fucking go, we are totally fine with recieving asks like this, because Autism. i'm gonna put this under the cut, because it got long lmao. we hope you have a good day/night too, anon, and that you enjoy hearing our thoughts!

though there are definetly some stereotypes and stuff in how mikoto and john are written, we fucking adore them. especially me! how john is portrayed is something i love, mostly because i relate to him a lot. double is fantastic tbh, it reminds me so much of how i can feel handling the system as a whole. persecutors (and gatekeepers) are, at our cores, misguided protectors. and double shows that really well, and how it can feel to be villainised and misunderstood despite us trying to help. i'm also honestly still on the fence on whether or not john has ever actually killed people, or if its more of like. a metaphor? that's probably just wishful thinking though. i also really liked the little phone conversation we got to see mikoto have with their mom. that also reminded us of us a lot too. both the contents of the call, and also the fact it shows they are close with her. we're on good terms with our mom (though mostly out of necessity). i'd also like to see milgram hint more about what trauma they might have experienced to become a system. i know that's kinda bleak, but i think it could be really interesting. we have our own theories of course, as does a lot of the fandom lol. i want to see milgram hint more about what exactly made john be the way he is, and mikoto too. why did they have to be so covert? what drives john to hurt people? its pretty fascinating to think about. and obviously, the whole one alter is good, the other bad thing is a little. well, bad. but its also the case with a lot of systems to have an alter to blame bad stuff on. its not necessarily their fault, or the rest of the systems. but its pretty common. i'd also like to see hints to more alters than just mikoto and john (though obviously two people systems are very valid, that doesn't really fit with them much, it seems like there's two active fronter alters rather than two total).

we aren't super active in the milgram fandom outside of looking at the occassional fanart and reading youtube comments. we probably should interact more with it, but we're also a little scared lmao. we are very rarely in active fandoms while the thing is still going on, so it can be intimidating. if anyone has any suggestions for blogs or twitter accounts to follow that you like, do send them in. we'd appreciate them.

in terms of milgram in general, we fucking love it. cat is a fantastic song and made us fall for kazui. yuno is one of my favourite characters to have ever been made. we also relate a lot to fuuta. and in general, i think its such an interesting subject to make a series like this about. it really makes people think and that's always a good thing. it opens up conversations on morals, how ourselves would deal with certain situations, how our first reactions can be innacurate and damaging, how our actions can be damaging, and how we aren't always so different from the people we see as villains. its well written and so, so good. plus, the songs are catchy and the visuals gorgeous. what more could you want lmao. anyway, yeah. those are our (mostly my) thoughts on milgram lol. its just, really great.

~ moondust 😈🧷🎶

[nightswithkookmin]

Goldy I never thought I would reach out to any Jikook blog but after your last post I have to. I am an east asian american and trans. I have never spoken on this issue, commented or posted about this. I am a Jikook supporter but sometimes Jikook supporting blogs don't feel like the friendliest place. I want to thank you for changing my opinion on that. It is an insult to BTS to say Jikook don't know they seem gay or that they don't know what gay looks like. It is an insult to fans like me to say it would be OK to do the things they do if they were cisgendered straight men. I personally saw a few people say or dance around this and they got intimidated by big blogs for it. I would never name names because I beleive in free speech and the right of people to express themselves, as long as it isn't hate speech. Supporting lgbt people and making sure they don't feel endangered is MORE IMPORTANT THAN STANNING A KPOP BAND and I say this as a 4 year long bts and Jikook stan. So many people don't want to touch this issue and I understand why.

But thank you for supporting ACTUAL lgbt people as well as bts and showing stubborn people that BTS mean gay rights when they say gay rights.

I don't know why but this Ask made me cry...

I've been reading it over and over for the past two days and each time I feel humbled by it. Thanks so much for sharing this with me.

I think the era of the obsessed 'kids' and '13 year old shippers' in this space is coming to an end. I think it's time for a more nuanced mature conversation on what it means to ship and stan our faves in today's sociopolitical climate.

Let's intellectualize shipping and use it as a vehicle for social change not just pleasure. Sabotaging political hashtags is a start. Trending and donating to BLM is equally important. Fighting for gay rights and recognition is the next step and a natural progression from here- and about damn time!

Gone are the days where celebrities and idols were immune to accountability and personal responsibility. We live in a world where everyone is required to be converstant in and sensitive to social issues. Awareness is woven into our collective consciousness and for some of us we cannot divorce that from our pleasure receptors.

Hate to quote my pastor but, 'As a kid, I spoke, thought and reasoned like a kid. As I grew up, chilee darling, I put my ghetto ways aside. You feel me?' Lol. Yea, my pastor hood like that. Lol.

The fact of the matter is, BTS has a higher mature demographics now. Majority of us grew with them, if not past them. They are not seventeen anymore, Jin is almost thirty, the youngest in the group is past twenty three and majority of their fanbase are breaching Young Adult well into Adulthood and beyond.

We simply cannot view them with the same lens anymore. If we did, we would be infantilizing them if not enabling them.

We ought to be able to have certain conversations that reflect our age, hearts, backgrounds, experience, values and beliefs.

We can't sit behind our television sets and smart phone screens in this day and age and assume BTS sat through a performance like this and did not for a second think about what it meant, why the crowd cheered at certain moments or even understand the impact, message and intent behind it- especially not when Halsey, an openly bisexual woman and advocate for LGBTG rights is an acquaintance of thiers.

I don't know how a fraction of this fandom can assume BTS would have a collaboration of this nature and not know anything about the gay rights discourse or what queer baiting is or not consider how their actions may or may not be contributing to the marginalization of persons as these- to not have agency and personal responsibility or empathy.

JK cannot stan a gay artist such as Troye Sivan and divorce his music from his sexuality because it flows from it. Not when Troye has openly spoken about the struggles he went through as a closeted gay man, coming out and how that affected his mental health.

JK knows what gay is, he is aware of the struggles queer people face on a daily. His decision to cover, license and recommend songs by this artist is a deliberate act coming from a place of being informed on the matter.

Jimin knows. RM knows. Suga knows.

BTS cannot prepare a speech like this while oblivious to the plight of the LGBTQ plus community. I refuse to believe that simply because it's not true. Anyone who says otherwise is a scammer. Lol.

And I think they are intelligent enough to have cognisance of the fact majority of the world view certain aspects of their home culture as problematic and non-progressive and that this same world is watching them and what they do in this space matters.

They are part of the conversation. And it's in their interest to present themselves as queer a queer friendly band and company by distinctifying themselves from these 'traditional' Kpop bands.

I believe they know that being woke gives them a competitive advantage as MCs and advocates for the youth in today's world.

I believe they are aware certain things in their 'fan service culture' doesn't fly in the space they compete in and want to compete in. They are competing and rubbing shoulders with top LGBTQ plus advocates, sharing seats with them at awards, standing next to them- they best to look sharp.

It's obtuse for anyone to fall on the 'culture' rhetoric to excuse certain behaviors of their idols when actual queer people from and within that same culture fight against it.

Most S. koreans I know and have come across complain about their 'culture' and some even harbor strong resentments against this whole fanservice culture.

Holland, an openly gay Idol from South Korea, has equally spoken out against the 'fan service' culture prevalent within Kpop on several occasions and laments how it depoliticizes queerness and affects actual queer people within S.K.

And isn't it funny that the same conservative Christian population who strongly oppose homosexuality in S.K often lead online campaigns against Jikook for 'promoting homosexuality' because of certain fanservice and skinship they do?

If skinship is normal and fanservice is culture, why does conservative S.K keep pushing back against it? It's their culture uno?! Lmho.

Queer south Koreans and conservative Christians hate fanservice culture and yet here we are using their culture to defend it as if it's all black and white. Lmho.

Did they or did they not see South Korean's reactions to this performance by Jikook? The mixed feelings most had about it?

Men can nibble on men's ear but God forbid they toss them in the air and catch em💀

South Koreans are not a monolith. Their culture is nuanced like any culture. It's not static and not clear cut black and white either.

It's one thing to respect other's culture, it's another to perpetuate it in ignorance. Perpetuating their culture and being religious about it does not allow for the dynamism inherent in their culture.

Troye Sivan talked about how he'd stop in the middle of his concerts and performances upon seeing the hyper fangirls in the front row and then think to himself, 'I know they know I'm gay, so why are they still here...'

And this was before he came out.

Jikook know we know they are queer or that we think of them as queer. When Jimin talks about 'those that love me for me' he knows exactly what he is talking about or rather who he is talking to- it's not these hets I'm afraid.

Troye also talked about being privileged because he lived in a rather queer friendly neighborhood where everyone is gay and so he'd always felt safe coming out.

Isn't that what JK is doing?

Now this is a person who's without a doubt had a lot of influence on JK in his early formative years as an Idol right down to his decision to move into a much queer friendly neighborhood of Itaewon.

They know we know. Jikook is gay.

Thankfully, there are reports of a rising number of LGBTQ plus in South Korea, a lot of allies, a lot of queer folks coming out and a lot of companies opening up to working with gay idols and aspiring idols.

It's such a relief but a lot of work still needs to be done and I stand with them on behalf of Jikook and any queer folk in SK.

My sister is helping me reach out to an LGBTQ plus advocate from Seoul for an interview for my blog. If everything goes well, I'd love for her to share her thoughts on queer passing, queer baiting and fan service within Kpop and how that affects LGBTQ youth in South K.

It's a conversation I'm really passionate about and interested in.

I love me some ships, but I also love me some queer advocacy and human rights uno? Lol.

Thing is, I may quit BTS one day, but I can never quit being me. Being human. Always put the human first is my motto.

Oh and I hear people are plotting to cancel me? Chilee. Y'all do that but:

Let it echo.

Signed,

GOLDY

[katara0524]

Impromptu Ramblings about the NEO:TWEWY Demo

In case y'all weren't aware, I've been a pretty big fan of TWEWY for a couple years now, and with the sequel coming out next month, the excitement I feel for this game is greater than ever :) I played the Demo for the first time yesterday, and following a couple views of some livestreams of others playing it, I felt like sharing my (very ramble-y) thoughts prior to the release of the full game. This post WILL contain spoilers for both TWEWY and NEO:TWEWY, so if you want to avoid those from now on, please block the tags: #twewy spoilers, #ntwewy spoilers, #neo twewy spoilers, #ntwewy, and #neo twewy ^_^ Oh, and if you wanna keep up with any other posts I make about my experience with this game, please refer to the tag "kat plays neo twewy" :)

-First things first: I have not watched the Final Trailer and I don't plan on doing so to avoid spoilers, especially after the pre-release era of KH3 where a lot of the later trailers spoiled a lot of the endgame content. That being said, I've seen some minor screenshots from the final trailer including what many believe to be characters from the original TWEWY, namely Shiki and Joshua. That is all I know about the Final Trailer and I would very much like to remain as blind as possible going into NEO :)

-The very first cutscene was quite ominous in the sense that this game is likely going to be about "changing fate" (a recently common theme in Squeenix games, which I do appreciate), perhaps leading off from the end of A New Day in the OG and trying to stop an Inversion of Shibuya. Also worth noting that A New Day had similar aspects in which the main character experienced "future visions" of tragic events, although in A New Day these events were not able to be changed, while in NEO it seems like one of the main "powers" our protagonist has is specifically to rewrite these events and avoid a "bad ending." Very interesting indeed!

-I really like the revamped comic book style dialogue scenes, it's much more fluid and modern, which is an excellent direction for the series to take!

-I would love to have an actual PokemonGO knockoff of Final Fantasy creatures, please Squeenix that would be incredibleeeeee

-Also the LINE stickers??? Are so cute???

-I would just like to point out that Fret is an absolute treasure throughout this entire demo, he's hilarious and I will protect him with my life

-UHHHH don't like that Fret picked up some Reaper Pins just out of nowhere.....or the fact that they're apparently popular all over Shibuya.............did y'all not learn anything from the OG game or what lmao

-Okay so when I first got the "curry or ramen" scene and heard NPCs talking about the new curry place replacing the old ramen place I became IMMENSELY distressed that Ramen Don was totally cut from the game because....well, Ramen Don is a King okay?? But I'm glad to learn that no, he didn't fall off the face of the earth, he's still in business and he's the one opening the curry restaurant lolol. PHEW, crisis averted!

-.....I don't like the sudden appearance of a Wall Reaper and being able to read NPC thoughts. Wtf happened when they left the ramen place??? Are they playing the Game alive somehow?

-Okay so I have my own theories about this "Swallow" character and what they're up to but considering this is only the Demo and I still Have No Idea What's Happening, I'm just gonna say that I think Swallow intentionally led Rindo and Fret to the Crossing so they could join the Game. I mean, add in the fact that Swallow still communicates with Rindo during the Game and you've got yourself a suspicious character right there lol

-"Hey they're shooting off fireworks!" Fret honey that's not fireworks oof (see also: "*laughs* I'm in danger")

-WOOOOOO way to traumatize Rindo right off the bat like that LMAOO

-The visuals for the intro are VERY GOOD, the song is pretty decent until it gets all "screamo" (which I absolutely cannot stand sorry lol)

-Shoka is every Customer Service employee ever and I respect that

-Susukichi went from being "meh" to "WOW THIS GUY IS FUN" in the span of 10 seconds and I also respect that (he is also built like an Absolute Unit which is hilarious)

-The Wall Reapers (and just Reapers in general) seem.....way nicer and more helpful this time around?? Like in the OG the Wall Reapers were SO RUDE gfhjgjdfkhn and yeah I'm sure we'll get some like that but the juxtaposition of the first Wall Reaper in the OG compared to the first one in NEO is insane.

-The puzzles are quite a bit more entertaining this time around even if it's generally the same "fetch quest" formula lol

-"Rindo's Group" way to go Fret HFKJDGHSDFKJ mans really left the default name in there lmao

-OKAYOKAYOKAY so to those who aren't aware I am a MASSIVE SIMP for Sho Minamimoto, he's my absolute favorite and I think about him daily. HIS INTRODUCTION IS. INCREDIBLE. I LOVE IT SM.

-GOD hearing him actually SPEAK FULL SENTENCES is just SO SURREAL I love this sm

-Also the remix of his theme???? NEO TRANSFORMATION????? IT'S SO GOOD????????? It's like gone from a Boss Theme to a more triumphant sounding theme and I am HERE for it (every version of Transformation is just INCREDIBLE and getting a new one is even better)

-I Love Him, Your Honor

-Also idk how exactly but it's kinda weird seeing Sho in the OG vs NEO, cuz while he's mostly the same Insane Math-Obsessed Catboy, he's.....calmed down quite a bit?? Like OG made a whole point of how poorly he cooperates with others (not to mention just being completely unhinged and trying to kill everyone), whereas here in NEO he's......actually kinda working with others??? HELLO???? Sir what happened to you and Neku during those 3 years I would love to know all about it

-I guarantee you Sho is still probably scheming shite and will likely pull some total insane BS later down the road, and I am very much looking forward to that. Also, is he looking for a certain Pin or something??? Cuz he keeps talking about different Pins and even mentions "this is just another Psych Pin" like he's actively looking for a Pin to do something with. Maybe it also has to do with the "latent powers of Players" thing he mentioned as well??? What is this dude UP TO oml (also is he in contact with Neku at all?? they're both technically fugitives at this point right?? WHAT HAPPENED AFTER A NEW DAY I AM BEGGING YOU)

-I seems like Sho ALSO has an idea of what's going on in this specific game (even if he won't admit it straightforward). Per his quote "The game's 142,857. Factor it out," he's essentially saying, "This game is a neverending cyle, figure out how to get out of it" (or at least that's what I got from his "cyclic number" nonsense lolol)

-I do like how Sho mostly stays out of sight until he's needed for a battle or assisting with a mission, that's kind of on par with his whole "uncooperative" quirk from the OG, plus he might literally have to stay out of sight of other Reapers and Players considering he's likely breaking the rules of the Game (not surprising considering him and Neku broke practically every rule in the book during OG)

-The nicknames for Sho- I can't- They're so FUNNYYYY GFHJSDFKJ

-He goes from being called "Pi-Face" and "Tabooty" in OG to "Mr. Minami" and "M-Teezy" in NEO LMAOO

-(Wowee I just realized I've been mostly talking about Sho oopsies sorry y'all, this is what I meant by thinking about him almost daily he is THAT much of a fav of mine ghfkjsd)

-Okay RIP Fret and Rindo for not getting literally ANY explanation as to how the Game works OOF, that is kinda cringe that whoever gets the Pin earns points, not whoever erases the Noise (which like I understand but also URRRGGHHH I WANNA SEE THE SQUAD SUCCEED)

-"I should be going home now it's getting late" Oh you sweet summer child-

-Also love the mention of parents in this game???? KH you could learn a thing or two from TWEWY (poor Rindo's mom fhgjkdh)

-KUBO IS HILARIOUS I SUPPORT HIM AND HIS GROSS FACE (also thank you Final Trailer thumbnail for spoiling my suspicions about him very cool smh)

-Kaie is a LAD I also support him, go King type those funky texts I believe in you

-FRET PLS STOP SCANNING FHGJKSDHKJFGHFKJ he's like me when I scan in OG during Weeks 2 and 3 and see Taboo Noise coming after me ghfjdshfj

-Also Rindo can you stay off your phone for TWO SECONDS ik you're trying to figure things out but Fret is a jelly boi and I don't want him to be upset with you my guy

-Sho being an actual sorta mentor to the kiddos?? Who are you sir this is so unlike you ghfgskj what happened to the guy who tried shooting children in the face 8 times over LMAO (granted he's probably just using them but it's still nice to see him actually cooperating and sharing knowledge with the kiddos aaaaa)

-EYO EIJI OJI THE TIKTOK INFLUENCER IS BACK LMAO

-hgjkfshgkjf "we aren't glorifying capitalism on my watch" THATS SO FUNNY TO ME GFHJFSDGHJKS (also an all-orange ensemble is disgusting you deserve jail for one thousand years fkn Cheddar Goldfish Cheezit ass woman)

-WICKED TWISTERS NAME DROP EYOOO we love to see it

-gfhsgjf Poor Rindo embarassing himself for the sake of the Game that's incredible

-R e t u r n t o M O N K E. That is all.

-Dialogue during boss battles is HELLA cool i love that

-HHHHH THE KANON SCENE MADE ME A N G E R Y FRET STOP SIMPING MY GUY says the girl with a Literal Simp Encyclopedia and simps for pixels on a screen daily

-Can't wait to see the other Reapers :eyes emoji:

-CAN'T WAIT TO SEE NAGI MY BELOVED YEAHHHH WOOOOOO AAAAND that's about it for the demo lolol, I absolutely CANNOT wait for next month, this game is gonna be INCREDIBLE holy hell Prepare for more simping, more screaming, and more vibing from Yours Truly :) I fully intend on sharing more general thoughts like this on both Tumblr and Twitter so it's not just reblog-retweet-reblog-retweet with the occasional comment fhgskjd

If you wanna witness my insanity up close and personal I have a Square Enix Discord server called Sea Side Dreamers! You can look it up on Disboard, or you can add me on Discord @Katara0524#9244 for a direct link :) We have topics about Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, NieR, and ofc TWEWY (as well as other topics!), so if you want some good ol' chaos and chitchat, you're more than welcome to join!

[thejustmaiden]

Jaken = Rin's Dad?

Okay, is this how a daughter treats their so-called father?

Most definitely not.

Rin and Jaken's relationship clearly screams of your typical sibling rivalry punctuated with cute and silly moments of playful bickering.

Yes, Jaken may technically be her main provider, but that doesn't necessarily equate to him being more of a father than Sesshomaru. If anything, he demonstrates more of a brotherly love towards her. As we all know, parents (which Sesshomaru embodies more based on real life patterns and parallels) will leave their older more capable children in charge of looking after their younger brothers and sisters. In this case, that would mean making Jaken responsible for watching over Rin and protecting her if need be. Ah-Un offers protection, too. Think of it as Jaken as the big brother and Ah-Un as the family dog who are babysitting while Sesshomaru as the parent of the household is away at work or taking care of business. I mean, they literally fit that description to a tee and I'm dying at the accuracy of it all! 🤣👌

[Quick! Someone write up a modern au where Sesshomaru finally gets out to have a nice date night but everything goes wrong in the most spectacular way. Like maybe Rin and Jaken catch a ride on Ah-Un to go spy!]

I recently revisited some episodes from The Final Act, and I couldn't believe how many moments like this there were where Rin got after Jaken or when she would "put him in his place" so to speak. Obviously, all of it is mostly harmless. I was only surprised by how often it occurred, not to mention how Jaken would just stand there and take it. Towards a supposed father figure, Rin's behavior is downright unacceptable. There's a certain level of respect a child is expected to show their parents/guardians, and that's just not what I'm witnessing here between them. Like at all.

Rather their dynamic has the nature of some sibling relationships like I mentioned above. So I really wish fans would stop pretending otherwise, because based on what we know of father-daughter relationships- healthy ones at least- they don't appear anything like what Jaken and Rin have. If you could please provide me other examples of where we've seen similar portrayals in fiction or in real life, then perhaps I can get on board.

Look, that doesn't have to mean that because Jaken isn't her father then Sesshomaru must be. They can both be her caretakers without necessarily filling that traditional father role. I'm just saying that if we're going to start assigning titles to characters, let's make sure we are accurate and truthful in our assessments. If you're going to label anyone Rin's dad, then it needs to be Sesshomaru. Jaken doesn't have precedence over him in terms of fatherly attributes, that just wouldn't make sense.

After all, this isn't about what you want to see, this is about what Rin very likely sees. It's safe to assume that she views Sesshomaru more like a father than she does Jaken. She knows she's safe with him (broadly speaking lol) and that he'll come for her no matter what. That sense of security and comfort is what a child seeks and what they should always feel in a parent's presence. She trusts and even idolizes him, just as a young and innocent child tends to do with their parents. At that age, parents are perfect and could do no wrong in their child's eyes. Idk about you, but this describes perfectly how Rin is around Sesshomaru.

Rin adores him and will follow him anywhere- yes, even into danger! That's what the innocence and unconditional love of a child will bring them to do if necessary. Fortunately, at the end of The Final Act we learn Sesshomaru takes Kaede's advice when he realizes that leaving Rin with her in the village is in her best interests. That way she'd be able to lead a more normal and safer life alongside other humans. Remember, Sessrin shippers, that doesn't mean he wasn't still a part of her life and didn't witness her become a young woman over the years right before his very eyes. Therefore, if they eventually do become romantically involved, then most if not all of those gifts had intimate and seductive intentions and it essentially constitutes as child grooming.

I understand from a Sessrin shipper's point of view why it'd be so much easier to claim Jaken as the father. In doing so, they diminish Sesshomaru's role in her upbringing. By refusing to acknowledge the real role he had in helping raise Rin (short periods can be crucial and impressionable too esp. in a child's early years so yes they did assist in raising her not only Kaede), these shippers are better able to justify how their filial-like relationship evolved into a romantic one. So yeah, I get it, if I were a Sessrin shipper I'd probably do the same. It's one of the more plausible arguments available to them, after all. "Let's pin Jaken as the father to fend off antis!" is the best chance they've got, but even so, it's still not good enough. But if you insist Jaken is indeed like a father to Rin, then Sesshomaru is most certainly one too. Who says she can't have two fathers anyway?

The thing is however much you want to deny or downplay what Sesshomaru truly means to Rin and vice versa, nothing will ever change or hide the truth of the matter. Please, stop acting like they're only traveling companions and nothing more. Some of y'all even go so far as to say that they're like strangers. Knowing potentially little about a person is not equal to a lack of love and affection. Making big assumptions such as this to defend your ship is actually doing you more harm than good. Let me elaborate.

According to your reasoning, if that's all Rin ever was to him was a companion and Sesshomaru had no real attachment to her, then what precisely is the basis of your ship? Recall that Adult!Rin doesn't exist yet, thus we have no real idea what she will be like or if she's even alive. So how can you make comments like that but then go on later to say "they have such a unique and unbreakable bond" or "only Rin can be the mother because she's the only human he ever cared for" if all that time spent traveling together didn't amount to much in the first place like you claimed to believe beforehand? Do you see how your rationalizing is confusing?

Contrary to what some of you may think, I'm not just saying all this because I'm an anti and I'm obligated to disagree with you, or whatever other excuse you want to tell yourself. Believe it or not, I'm attempting to give as unbiased and objective of an analysis I can based on widely accepted interpretations of family dynamics, development, and any history we know of.

Of course I respect that at times fans will perceive things differently since that's bound to happen. What's hard for me to wrap my head around however is the unwillingness of some fans- not exclusively Sessrin shippers- to apply basic common sense and sound judgment to their observations and deductions.

Looking at all our facts, then taking the small handful of scenes Sesshomaru and Rin do share together into account, one can logically conclude that their dynamic is akin to one found in a typical parent-child relationship. If you still fail to recognize Sesshomaru as a parent to Rin, then that's fine too. In the end, that won't really change the fact that he'd still take on a role resembling an adult figure overseeing a young child's care and protection. Be it as a vassal, guardian, what have you. Plus, nobody is saying here that Sesshomaru doesn't make mistakes regarding Rin's general well-being, but so do all parents. Overall, I think the majority of us agree that Rin is in good hands. Whether it's in his direct company or in his occasional supervision from his frequent visits to the village.

In other words, it doesn't really matter what exact title you assign him in relation to Rin, as the distribution of power is all inherently the same with any and all adult-child relationships. That bond never changes once you've established it either, seeing as it's a special kind of connection one can only form with a child and a child alone.

I was a teacher for a few years, and speaking from personal experience, you don't need to be a parent, per se, to take on a role of authority in a child's life. I know without a doubt that I could never and will never view any of those kids I taught in a sexual/romantic light later down the road; yes, not even once they become grown-ups who are independent and more than capable of making their own decisions. Those of you who disagree are usually missing the whole point though, because we're not trying to dictate what Adult!Rin can and cannot do like many tend to accuse of us doing. This isn't a question of taking away from her autonomy nor does it fall under "purity culture," which is why people shouldn't continue jumping to these outrageous conclusions and really listen for a change. You're deflecting from the real issue here when you choose to misinterpret what we're saying by ignoring the problem we're actually referring to. You cannot present a valid counter-argument if you persist in twisting our words.

Bottom line: once these kids become old enough to pursue a sexual/romantic relationship, of course they have that right if they're ready. All we're trying to say is you guys ought to stop pushing forward this it's-completely-normal-to-want-to-bang-your-adoptive-dad-since-you're-an-adult-and-can-do-as-you-please agenda and not expect backlash. Ship it if you want, but please stop acting like their romance would be the epitome of a pure and healthy relationship.

Sesshomaru may not wear his heart on his sleeve, but it's foolish to presume he didn't actually care about Rin during their whole time together just because he didn't openly express his feelings until the very end. Surely everybody can comprehend that people handle and process their emotions differently. The way Sesshomaru chooses to is completely valid for the most part, so let's cut him some slack regarding this already.

What I'm trying to get at is that any child whose life you played an influential role in will always be a kid in a lot ways to you even when they're old and wrinkly. Just as they will always picture you as the loved one who guided and protected them when they were most vulnerable and couldn't always fend for themselves. Can't we relate this to children we know personally and apply it accordingly?

Finally, I want to end on this note. Could you kindly take a look at these two images below for a second?

The reason I ask is because of something I recently read that's relevant to the topic. There was this pro-sessrin tweet I saw that stated Rin trying to take care of Sesshomaru when they first met is what a mom would do for a child, which in their opinion, translates to Rin being more like a mother than a daughter if anything.

First off: are you freaking kidding me????

Seriously, so now children aren't allowed to tend to their sick or injured parents?! Parents are apparently superhuman and shouldn't be offered a helping hand from a child, even if they mean well and want to help their parent who's in pain?? Now this Twitter user was mostly being a smartass, but at the same time, it was evident they genuinely thought they offered a valid enough point that warranted no further explanation or clarification.

Secondly, by saying this Sessrin fans don't seem to realize that in actuality they're contradicting themselves and proving the point we've been trying to make all along. Glancing at the first picture and moving down to the second, the role of the one being cared for and the caretaker is reversed. So then by their own logic, Sesshomaru IS in fact like a father to Rin.

What it comes down to is the names you give to the roles these characters play aren't as crucial as the dynamic they share. The specific characteristics of that dynamic are what define the importance of said role, not so much the name in the role itself. So real father or not, Sesshomaru and Rin clearly mean a lot to each other. Close relationships are defined and solidified by the devotion and belonging they have to one another, not solely by the duration of time spent together and their proximity.

Well, that's a wrap! I hope you guys got something outta this blog, and that you enjoyed or found some portions of it interesting. I would love to hear your thoughts on the subject from this fandom, but only engage in conversation if you plan to be respectful. Thank you!

[idy-ll-ique]

This Can't Be.

Pairing: Tom Holland x F!Reader

Genre: Angst, Fluff (enemies to friends to lovers)

Warnings: mentions of an eating disorder, curse words lol

Requested: By anonymous

How about a Tom Holland x Reader where the reader is also famous and they fight a lot, and then a few days later she stops eating, and ends up exhausted and passes out and he goes to her house crying and apologizing, well, do it cry lol.

Summary: Y/N and Tom are in a new movie together but they don't really get along. Tom calls her a fatty, so she tries to lose weight by starving herself. After she ends up in the hospital, they make amends.

Author's Note: Hi y'all! A request after a such a long time! Also, I would like to apologize to anon if this isn't exactly what you were looking for. I still hope you like it.

---

Y/N POV:

"Tom from Marvel? Surely… surely you mean Tom Hiddleston?" I blurted out, my eyes going wide. "No, honey, Tom Holland. He's much closer to you by age, he's the perfect fit," my manager said, giving me a small smile. She knew how much I loathed that man.

"No, shut the fuck up, this can't be! It can't! You know I hate that overgrown manchild—"

"Please, Y/N. Try to understand. This movie can be your next big thing. It's offering a lot of money and they specifically requested for you. Come on, sharing one kiss with him can't be that bad," Ellie tried reasoning. "It can be that bad! I don't like him! It will be awkward! Why don't they choose Zen? She's awesome and they get along well!" I whined, covering my eyes with the palms of my hands.

"She has already done a lot of movies with him. From what I've heard, she rejected this movie and suggested your name. Come on, do it," Ellie urged tiredly. I groaned and flopped down on the bed. "Fine, I'll do it. If I end up murdering that man, try to save me," I muttered. Ellie laughed and left my room.

I curled up on the bed, my stomach turning. Just his name made bile rise up my throat and my blood boil. "Fucking Holland," I hissed under my breath. It all began on the sets of one of the movies we did together as teenagers, called Exile. The thing is, he— wait a minute.

My brows furrowed. What did he even do to me to make me hate him so much? "Come to think of it…" I mumbled, desperately trying to remember why I disliked him. "Eh, still," I huffed; even if I couldn't remember the reason, I hated him.

I got off the bed and went to the bathroom for I had an interview coming up soon.

---

Tom POV:

"Ew, Y/N? Are you fucking kidding me, mate? I can't do this movie with her," I spat, glaring at Harrison. "Why do you even hate her? She's such a sweet person," he sighed exasperatedly. "I— she just aggravates me so much! Plus, she decided to hate me first! She is never polite to me, why should I like her?" I stammered, throwing my arms up.

"Whatever. You are doing the movie and you are doing it with her. It's just one fucking kiss, dude, you'll be fine," Harrison said, rolling his eyes. I huffed and looked away when he walked out of the room. "Fucking Y/L/N," I hissed, crossing my arms.

She irked me so much. She always called me names and teased me. Except, when she teased me, she meant every word— she bullied me. I wondered if she had matured and decided to leave our childish banter behind but knowing her, I knew it was impossible. She was an overgrown child. "As if she has grown up," I laughed cruelly.

I shook my head and ridded myself from the thoughts of her, putting on my jacket. I had plans of going to the nearby bar with Harry, Haz and Sam. I wouldn't let Y/N destroy my night with the boys.

---

Y/N POV:

"Ugh, is he even coming? See, you can never expect him on time! Probably putting on his diaper or something, that takes time," I grunted, glaring at nothing on the wall in front of me. "Stop being rude, Y/N. Please, leave this old, childish and irrelevant banter and grow up. You don't even remember why you fought with him."

"It's just…" I looked away from Ellie and she rubbed my arm, a small sigh escaping her lips. "Where is she?" I heard and looked up. Tom was looking for me. "Over here, asshole," I called out and he stared at me. For a brief second, a look of confusion and shock came over his face. Then he quickly snapped out of it.

"Still the same entitled brat, I see. I would love working with you," he said with faux affection, a sarcastic smile on his face. "Likewise. Are we done here? I don't want to waste my time with you, I have lots more important things to do. To be honest, really everything is more important than you, so…" I poked my tongue out at him and walked away.

When I was about 15 feet away from him, I wrapped my arms around myself. For the first time in forever, I actually felt guilty about being so rude to him. Maybe Ellie was right, why should I fight with him if I didn't even remember why we started? I couldn't let down my guard now, though, I was too deep into this mess.

If I tried to be more cordial, he would start taunting me even more. I would snap and insult him, thus starting our fight all over again. I'd just have to swallow my guilt and keep being rude, I guess. I shook my head and walked out of the place.

---

Tom POV:

"How are you, Ellie?" Despite having enmity with Y/N, I really liked her manager. Ellie, unlike Y/N, was cute, sweet and polite. "Hi Tom, I'm good! I'm sorry about Y/N. I tried to tell her that your banter is childish but she completely ignored me," she sighed and we hugged each other.

"Y/N is a stupid bitch, you don't need to pay attention to her. She has always been rude and bratty, at least you're not like her. You're so much better," I chuckled. Ellie and Haz shook hands, smiling at each other. "Are you sure you'll be comfortable working with each other? What if the fight escalates?" Ellie asked worriedly.

"I will try my best to be friendly with her, I won't let the fight escalate. Nothing should ruin the movie," I sighed, rubbing my forehead. "I don't know why she wants to fight with you, Tom. She herself told me she didn't remember why you fought in the first place and now…"

"Wait, she what?" My eyebrows knit together in confusion. "Yes! She doesn't remember why you started your banter and now she won't listen to me when I tell her to give up the enmity," Ellie said, her lips pulled into a thin line. "Wait, I don't… I don't remember either…" I mumbled. Haz and Ellie looked at each other.

"Why don't you two just try to be friends? Please? Both of you are amazing people, this banter is nonsensical," Haz insisted. "I'll try my best but I don't know about her dram—"

"Tom."

"Ugh, sorry!"

---

Y/N POV:

"Yo, wassup pussy! Too scared, huh? No wonder your roast game is weak AF," I laughed, walking into the room with a packet of chips in my hands. Two months had passed since we started working together. For some reason, though, he absolutely didn't try to rile me up with his smartass comments. Somehow, I felt as if he was holding back, but I don't know… I had to find out.

He looked at me and rolled his eyes. "Will you shut up, fatty? I'm trying to do something here and working without your overweight ass will be so much easier! I tried to end our fight but you surely don't want to grow up! Leave and don't come back," he snapped, glaring at me.

I froze. His comment… actually hurt. It hurt me in my heart. Fatty. Overweight. I looked at the packet of chips in my hands and walked up to the nearby bin, throwing it away. I tried to hold my tears in as I ran out of the room to my trailer. Once I was in the comfort of my own trailer, I let the tears roll down my eyes.

For 15 minutes, I sat crying. I felt ashamed of insulting him, now. He grew up. I was still the rude teenager he worked with in Exile. Of course he hated me, I hadn't been nice to him at all. This was my fault. When I finally stopped crying, I looked at myself in the mirror.

I promised myself that I would be more polite to him after this.

---

Tom POV:

"Yo, where is Y/N? Our scene starts in five minutes! Ellie?" I questioned, looking at her. "The last time I checked she was in her trailer, should I go check on her?" she offered. I shook my head. "Let me go." I walked out of the room and went to her trailer. "Y/N! Don't you know our scene starts in five minutes? Get your ass up!"

When I got no snide remark in return, my brows furrowed. What was she doing in there? "Y/N?" I called out, knocking on the door. The door, I found out, was open. Against my own wish, I opened the door. A loud gasp escaped my lips. "Y/N!" I shouted, swiftly climbing into the trailer.

She had fallen on the floor, unconscious, her head resting against the bed. My eyes widened in horror when I observed her pale skin and skinny body. Her bones were poking out; it looked as though she was wearing her skin on her skeleton like spandex. "Y/N!" I whispered, picking her up. My heart broke when I noticed how lightweight she was.

"Tom? We heard you shou— what happened?" Ellie gasped, running towards me. "She's too cold, we need to take her to the hospital," I spoke rapidly. The two of us called an ambulance and within half an hour, Y/N was being taken to the hospital. Ellie and I were with her.

"What happened? She… she looks so skinny…" I asked Ellie, my chest heaving. "Fucking hell! She wasn't eating! Every time I offered food she said she wasn't hungry or that she ate already… now I know! She was starving herself! It's been 5 months, she hasn't eaten a single thing—"

5 months. I knew what happened 5 months ago. "Will you shut up, fatty?" I whispered, a sharp pain coursing through my chest. She wasn't eating because I called her fat. I shouldn't have, not when she wasn't fat at all! This was all my fault. Why did I let this happen?

"Tom, is everything okay?" I looked at Ellie, snapping out of my thoughts. "Uh, yeah— yeah I'm good," I muttered. Upon reaching the hospital, Y/N was immediately put up for an emergency operation.

I stayed at the hospital for 5 hours with Ellie, that's how long her operation took. The shooting was temporarily put on hold and news outlets started talking about Y/N being in the hospital. The hospital was shut down.

---

Y/N POV:

Darkness. All around me. What happened? Where was I? I tried to open my eyes but it hurt. I groaned and forced them open, trying to sit up. I moved my hands but found out they were connected to something. "Ms Y/L/N!" a surprised voice gasped. "Where am I?" I moaned.

"I'm Dr Watson, you're at the hospital," he said soothingly, scribbling something down on his notepad. "Like Sherlock?" I chuckled weakly, giving him a smile. "I've been asked that many times. Good to know you're feeling better, Y/N," he smiled, ruffling my hair.

He then proceeded to walk out of the room. A few seconds later, Ellie and Tom walked in. "What the fuck, Y/N? You thought starving yourself while shooting a movie was important? Why did you do this? You gave us all a heart attack!" Ellie scolded, glaring at me. I looked away, ashamed.

"I know someone didn't care," I muttered. "If you're thinking of me, you're wrong. I found you unconscious, Y/N, and brought you here. Of course I cared. I would also like to apologize for my rude remark, I shouldn't have called you that," he said, rubbing the back of his head.

I stared at him. He brought me here? "Oh, uh, thank you, I guess," I said softly, giving him a small smile. He smiled back. "I'm going to speak to the doctor, you stay here." Ellie left the room. Tom looked around and finally pointed to the bed. "May I?" he asked awkwardly.

"Sure," I laughed. He grinned and sat down near my abdomen. For a few minutes, there was silence between us. "So, I guess we should stop fighting, huh? I mean, none of us remember why we fought, so…" Tom said, looking out of the window. "You're right. Friends?"

"Friends." We shook hands, smiling at each other. "I'm sorry for all the rude things I've called you over the years, I really am," I apologized sincerely. "I'm sorry, too. Maybe we can forget all that and try to get to know each other?" Tom suggested. "I like that idea," I chuckled.

"Why did you starve yourself, though?" he asked quietly. "Every time I saw food, your voice echoed in my head. Fatty. I lost my appetite and didn't eat," I explained, looking at my lap. "I'm so sorry," he said, frowning at me. "It's okay, I'm fine now. We're friends now, I'll be fine." We gave each other small smiles.

Turns out, I had to stay at the hospital for a month and after that, the shooting would resume. Every single day for a month, Tom and I hung out at the hospital. Our getting-to-know-each-other sessions were going really well; we actually had a lot of interests in common! I would've known this, of course, if I wasn't too busy fighting with him for absolutely no reason.

---

Tom POV:

"Today's the kiss scene, right?"

I fixed my bow tie, running a hand through my hair. "Yeah. Thankfully we're friends now, it shouldn't be that awkward." I grinned at Harrison. He grinned back. "I'm glad. Your fight was pointless anyway."

We left my trailer and walked towards the sets. When I walked in, I paused— Y/N was looking adorably stunning in the dress she wore. Her hair was done amazingly and she was chatting with Ellie. Not many people were at the set today, the scene was going to be shot privately.

I had to admit, after hanging out with her for a month, I started forming a crush on her. Maybe I could ask her out on a date, see how that worked out… "Tom! Here!" I looked at Y/N, who waved me over. I walked to her, a wide smile on my face. "You're looking really beautiful," I complimented, smirking a bit when she blushed.

"Not too shabby yourself, sir," she winked. "If you're ready, shall we start?" the director called out. The two of us gave our signals and took our place. The setting was such: A ballroom, the two of us were dancing. We simply had to say I love you and give each other a kiss. Not too difficult, we would be done in five minutes.

"And… action!"

We said those three words to each other, smiled dreamily and leaned forward. When our lips connected, I felt real-life butterflies in my stomach. I liked Y/N and the kiss… the kiss was amazing. "Cut!" We pulled away. After gazing at each other for ten seconds, we burst out giggling. "You're a pretty good kisser, Tom."

"Not too shabby yourself, ma'am," I teased, repeating her previous words. "Wanna get coffee after changing?" she asked, a twinkle in her eye. "Do I? Meet you at the gates in thirty minutes, last one there's a loser!"

"Tom, come back, ugh!" Y/N yelled as I ran towards my trailer. "It's not my fault you're wearing a dress!" I yelled back, laughing loudly. "Shut up!"

Our date went extremely well, needless to say.

---

A/N: Leave a like! Thanks for reading!

[throwing-summers-at-the-walls]

Hi, i hope you are feeling good! Im better than yesterday so i can finally answer you. First of all: i am so happy that you shared your fanfiction! i had a great time reading it! Im always open for more recs. Maybe your all time favorites? Or if you know some good h/c these are always welcome :) And YESSS please send me a link to your fanvids. -- yeah 13rw was super cursed. haha i also watched season 1 but thankfully i was able to sto watching becaue i could feel it making me feel bad (1)

I agree the suicide scene was just cringe (but i think i remember reading somewhere that they cut it out? idk) and overall this show just gave me the feeling that there was no hope and things are always getting worse instead of better and i hated that. but enough of that cursed show. can i just say i really admire how open you are about your feelings (like being suicidal and that) i realy, really admire this about you. i have so much respect for you that you can just share your feelings here (2)

I have never heard of ace attorney but that story you described sounds really good. and i get reading sth that isnt good for you and still doing it (because im a dumb bitch too :D) -- okay i might accept that Root will never grow on you (but i thought so too and look at me now :D) but i havent fully given up yet :)-- yes thats the girl. i think it was really sweet when she said that to Shaw. and i think Shaw appreciated it that someone tried to figure her out instead of just writting her off (3)

Shaw is really cool and definately also a badass and in combination with John its just great! but you will have to suffer trough some Shoot.  but maybe, maybe you will end up not hating Root. hope dies last (idk how the saying goes in english, sorry). -- Did you ever ship Caresse (in a romantic way)? cause sometimes i do and sometimes i dont and i get so confused about it :) but i think most of the time i like them more as friends. anyway her death really sucked and you are right with (4)

her death and them losing the library it felt like a different show (i mean i guess it was a different show then). i kinda get your feelings about the destroyed library because i also really loved it (and im really bad with change) but i dont think it affected me as much as you. but yeah i still missed the library very much. and while the subway is a really cool new place its not the same. (also the subway is super dark cause its underground and idk it just makes the whole thing less homey) (5)

Yes he is everything! such a great, interesting character and i wish there were more John-centric episodes! (like ones that explored his character more). that was one of my biggest dislikes of the later seasons that John wasnt featured as much anymore. i think he chuckled a few times in the show but a real laugh? i cant remember one :(  -- He did promise Joss to talk to Tyler so @show were is that talk? -- if seen the vid its awesome! thehiddenmemory has some great poi vids! (6)

yes i think so too. Like Grace would probably be relived and thankful that Harold is still alive and maybe they would even try again but eventually she would figure out that she cant trust him after lying to him for so long or sth like that and Harold would ofc realize that he is in love with someone else now. And then he finds out that John is still alive but stayed away cause he didnt want to get in the way of Harold/Grace. But then Harold comes back. And when they meet again John is like (7)

you came back for the machine? what about Grace. But Harold tells him he came back for John not the machine and then they kiss and have a happy live with Bear (sorry i got a little carried away here :D). -- Yeah Zoe is really hot and she needed more screen time! -- i hope you have a good day and i hope i havent messed up the numbers on the asks! :)

Hi ! I'm finally free from the resits, I hope you're doing okay with your thesis 💛

Sorry for replying late, there was the exam resits, and I read a bunch of fics, then I fell into pokémon and started bingewatching it. (Also I had a breakdown during therapy today so I'm gonna finish writing my answer to distract myself - it's been sitting in my drafts for so long rip)

Thank you !! It was a very personal thing, I'm really happy you liked it !! Your support and your comment made me thrive 💛💛

Tbh I was surprised to see it get kudos given that the only intended audience was my self projecting ass 🤣

So, my fav fics (my fav fic ever is in French, rip to y'all bc it's so good):

I am, I am, I am by RavenWhitecastle

Actually check the entire series this work belongs to: The Sinner and the Saint. I haven't finished it yet but I love it (I just skipped the explicit fics bc I don't like smut or sub!John)

Breaking All The Rules by talkingtothesky

Outsider Perspective by Neery

A Really Private Person by astolat

Hamartia (the hero's fatal flaw) by astolat

If Only for Tonight by spacemutineer

From Here, Where? by AKMars

Stroll by TheaNishimori

and the world was gone by lunarcorvid

a light that never goes out by vindicatedtruth

Limitations. by Michaelssw0rd

Reel you in and spit you out by Michaelssw0rd

All I Want For Christmas Is You by richmahogany

By What Power I Am Made Bold by brinnanza

Aftershocks by darringtons

At Certain Hours It All Breaks Down by nogoaway

construction of a kingdom by the_ragnarok

You Take Me Higher Than I've Gone by talkingtothesky

All Together Now by beadedslipper

I'll Let the Waters Still by brinnanza

Birthday Tradition by talkingtothesky

Things My Father Taught Me by KRyn

Truth is in the Eye of the Beholder by infiniteeight

Better Luck This Time by Lisztful

Motivations by JenNova

What's On the Table by cortue

In Another Life by Della19

I Thought We Already Were by talkingtothesky

Misunderstandings by thisstarvingartist

This is already fucking long omg so for the h/c: my bookmarks filtered with Rinch and h/c

Here's my playlist, it's mostly Rinch, but there are a few not Rinch vids, plus some scenes I like

This is long enough already, so it's time for a read more. Also, warning, we be talking about suicide

The portrayal of suicide is cringe most of the time anyway. If my suicidal ass can find a list of suicide methods and their lethality in 2 mins on Google you'd think writers who are supposed to do some research would be able to find them too but no they're like "ah yes slicing wrists" even though it's literally the shittiest method 🙄 (I just don't understand why slicing wrists seems to be such a popular method in the collective imagination ? It's weird.) At least in 13rw she took aspirin and cut herself vertically instead of horizontally but still, no hesitation wounds, and she dies even though she only got 4 wounds iirc ? I know more about jumping off bridges than slicing wrists, but it kinda sounds like bullshit to me. Also Netflix once suggested "beyond the reasons" to me, it's a sort of discussion with the cast and crew of 13rw and the only thing I remember is a moment of intellectual masturbation abt how they "opened a discussion abt suicide" 😬😬😬

They may have cut it out it's not impossible, idk I didn't hear about it, but it's not like I look for info about this dumpster fire lol. Maybe they faced backlash ? Wouldn't be surprised given how shit the show was. And yeah it has a hopeless vibe, I mean that's how it be when you're suicidal, but I didn't like it either.

You're sweet 💜💜 it's interesting that you find it respectable or admirable, I don't have an external point of view, so I'm just like 🤷 it is what it is. I understand where you're coming from though, I guess it's still quite a taboo subject, and suicidal people don't always feel comfortable talking about it, so me throwing around that I jumped off a bridge must be surprising. I'm detached enough from my suicide attempt that I'm able to talk about it without much of a problem, and I'm not really suicidal anymore.

Dumb bitches unite 👏👏👏 we be out there reading shit we shouldn't read

Yeah I think it's nice how the show didn't portray Shaw as a bad person for not having "normal feelings". Well, hope makes one live as we say in French (idk the English saying either lol) but don't hold much hope about me liking Root lmao

I used to ship careese bc they kissed in the crossing, but then I read some Rinch fics and I just ended up falling into it to the point where I stopped caring about careese. Now I think their relationship works better as a friendship.

Yeah all that change really puts me off... It just gives me "bad spin-off" vibes. Especially since there is less John :( and less Rinch :((((

Lmao yeah I just have a lot of feelings about early poi hgkfglrk. Also :/ I'm sad about the subway being less homey pls I just want happiness ?? I swear this show destroys my heart on top of owning my last braincell (brb changing my blog title to this lmao)

Mood I need all the John-centric eps, give me m o r e characterization and development and backstory and feelings hhhhhhh. I love him so much I just wanna spend more time with him. And that's what fics are for ! Yeah thehiddenmemory is so talented ! Astolat made some good ones too, on top of writing really good fics ! (Our fandom has been blessed with the presence of one of the ao3 founders hell yeah)

Also, remember how we talked abt the poi subreddit ? The other day I left a comment on there, wild I know. It wasn't a discussion about the last seasons though, I'm not crazy, it was about the impact poi had in our lives so I said it literally taught me English. Who knows maybe sometimes I'll comment again lol. I just don't wanna meet one of those people who prefer late poi over early poi.

Allow me to uuuuh write something based on what you said. Don't ask me how John survived with no major injuries, my man got that Thick Plot Armor alright. Hope you appreciate me getting carried away sjdkdksk it's kinda rushed and the first part isn't that good bc idk how to write Grace I'm just here for that sweet sweet Rinch stuff

Harold is eating breakfast with Grace in her kitchen – he can't think of her home as his home – when his phone vibrates. It's a text from the machine. It's a surprise, she barely contacted him since... He blocks the thoughts and the images coming to his mind. The machine sent him a picture. When he opens it, his heart misses a beat. Right here on his screen is a silhouette he thought he would never see again. His phone vibrates again. Another picture, this time it's unmistakably John, wearing his signature suit, Bear next to him. Transfixed, he stares at his phone until he feels Grace gently touching his arm. She goes straight to the point.

"Is it John ?" He looks up in confusion, but before he can say anything, she adds, "I hear you call him in your sleep every night."

"It's him, yes." He doesn't want to explain. He only wants to see John, to touch him, to tell him how much he loves him.

"You should go back to him. I like you, Harold. I am deeply relieved to see you alive. But I've been thinking, and... It's not working. This, us... You aren't really the man I fell in love with, the man I grieved... I can't trust you anymore." She doesn't say 'You lied to me' but Harold hears it all the same.

~

Harold sits on their bench. The machine indicated John often comes here. Soon enough, his arms are full of Bear, and John is standing in front of him.

"John. How are you ?" he asks when Bear finally calms down.

"Busy. And you ?"

Harold eyes him suspiciously – John once said he was busy when he was bleeding and way too close to death – but he seems to be well.

"I'm fine." He doesn't have time for awkward small talk." I thought you were dead. Why didn't you contact me ?"

"The machine told me you were with Grace. I thought you wanted to come back to your previous life. I didn't want to crash into it and ruin what you had."

Harold wants to be angry at him, but he understands. He did the same with Grace.

"You would never ruin anything. Besides, my relationship with Grace... didn't survive my lies. She's very dear to my heart, but she's a part of my previous life, as you said."

"So you came back for the machine, and the numbers, like the good old times ?"

Harold gets up from the bench.

"I came back for you. You are an important part of my life. The most important part."

John smiles, finally. He takes a step towards Harold, they're so close they could kiss. Harold reaches out, grips his shirt and slowly inches closer. He's still afraid of being rejected but John wraps his arm around him and kisses him. The kiss is over too soon. John's smile is even wider when they part.

"You're the most important part of my life too," he says before kissing Harold again. "You will stay ?"

"Always."

Damn I live for sappy Rinch stuff.

Bitches decided that Harold saying "always" is peak Rinch. It's me I'm bitches.

Also ofc I had to make a reference to number crunch, who do you think I am

Anyway. I hope you have a good day ! 💛

[ppgxrrblove]

-Smells the air- You smell that kiddies? It's time for sharing salty people.

So, I had someone follow me, and I checked their profile as I always do. Found out the person actually supports people who believe that without a man and woman -you can make a baby < u > and supported the major close to harassments and mostly making fun of the maker of the post (if you do not know what post I am talking about? It's legit the one me talking about the whole fact; that you need a man and a woman to bare a child -right there) -people's opinions on the subject at hand. Great person, right? Honestly hope she changes, and changes her mentality cause wow.

Anyway, I went on to disagree with a post about this topic right here- that to be honest sounds like an occult to me .-. major lukewarm stuff thinking right there. I ended up responding to this post by stating this;

The maker of the post of course didn't respond back, rather the ex follower of mine did, and boi did it not go well lol.

But, before I continue would like to make this clear; I make these posts to be "petty", and honestly to show you that some people really do need to be called out for their actions, thinking they can go on their day by making legit accusations of a person they got salty over THIS freaking comment -just, whatever you wanna see me as for me doing these types of posts -i just do not care, rather share my experience with these people to share with y'all that I do not start nothing. Rather my freedom of speech on here is to be stripped away, because of how over sensitive these types of people are, and you should be careful around.

-To continue; she messaged me and said this;

Okay -you rudely accused me of something that I never did, and I knew you were salty, but um whatever -let's ignore that -sigh. Notice how she repeated herself twice on the uncomfortable crap.

I responded back;

Than I waited for her response, and she responded back but she blocked me -like, what type of Christian are you to not allow another actual Christian talk as well? Being a Christian -real one not this occult stuff (being honest here) isn't a easy thing to do, and part of being a Christian and should be a common thing people should do -is allowing others to respond back, without blocking them and hearing what they have to say -not dictate them and run away. Not a cool idea, you were displaying actions of an immature false Christian.

-Fyi; I've had friends online who would actually tell me their experiences they had with people -would even see it myself on their profiles and comments, of how they handled their conversations with others, and even though they strongly disagreed with each other -and my friend has major bad fucking depression and anxiety, -what we all have, by the way. -She at least handles it well and mature to allow the person to respond back even if it leads to an argument -she and many others their self stop the conversation of course, and when it leads to arguments they will continue but they do in fact stop because people will get in and stop it but fuck -at least they hear each other out! Have the darn decency to do that.

-Even when I have people attacking me on my other social media, I allow them to respond back no matter how bad it is, I allow it because I am not gonna be a prude. To strip them away from freedom of speech, because of how stupid they sound or I sound at times. -Finally; even a person that I do not like because of their actions they've done have the audacity to freaking allow me to respond back, plus the fact that we do not like each other -it's bad but at least we both allow each other to speak out. And listen.

To make it short; if you wanna act like an immature person even though you are a grown woman online, fully aware of your actions than that's your problem not mines or anyone elses but I advice you to stop it before it gets much worse than me talking about our conversation -or anyone who acts like her. Shoot, my friend ran away from confronting me about something but when I messaged her to see if she was okay (even though are friendship was starting by the way) she at least responded back. That's what made me happy that you communicated with me -going off topic on this post, but just wanted to explain that stop being a dictating bitch and only listening to yourself. It's messed up.

Continuing on topic; She, ended up responding back and said this right after she blocked me;

Yeah, okay "cool" response, I did make a response back but shit Tumblr deleted my comment quick before I could copy and paste it on here -yipee!! Ugh I am so irritated that this happen, it was one of those good comments too lol. I ended up realizing the my clipboard on my Google keyboard was freaking turned off this entire time too..

I did luckily took a screenshot of what I said to her, half of it though;

Finally; when you meet people like this, and they do this type of crap -go on with their rest of their day cause they looked mature doing so, if you wish to call them out for their behavior, without it being petty. Than do so, people like this shouldn't be sugar coated and allowed to trample others because they wish to be an sjw person towards you. But , if you wish to not do so and don't care what happen -like, I do sometimes, because it's not that serious than that's good too.

But, sincerely hope you change for the best @kissmeimalicia

[whateverisbeautiful]

Reveling in Richonne

#99: The TLC (7x16)

Every time Rick and Michonne have a scene, or even just a moment together, it’s electric. Like every single time, since the beginning. 💯

They can make such a huge statement with something as small as a gesture. Which leads me to the final Richonne moment of season 7. 😋🎉

So we have this montage of all the happenings after the battle. We see all these different activities and what people are up to and then we get a visual that shows us why Rick is the realest of ones. 👌🏽

Y’all I seriously love that they included this moment in the montage of Michonne resting up and Rick being right by her side holding her hand. 😊

It’s so good and Rick is a man who has his priorities all the way straight!

I loved the way they pan over from Tara and Rosita and then for a moment you just see Michonne lying in the nearby bed and then they reveal what I’ve been saying since the start of these posts which is that Rick and Michonne are legitimately magnets. Cuz sho nuff, Rick is right there with her. 👌🏽

I remember watching this moment the first time and just being like…

Cuz this was such a nice way to close out the Richonne of the season. It's kind of mind boggling how much camaraderie, chemistry, and just pure love is conveyed in just this one shot. 🙉☺️ Like there’s so much good stuff about this single wordless moment.

Like One; It really does show how R&M are always a priority to each other. Cuz Rick is ASZ leader and it could be easy for him to get occupied with a bunch of different things as all these communities are now looking to him to guide them but I love that none of that is going to stop Rick from being in the most important place for him to be which is by Michonne’s side.

Two; This was also nice just cuz like Rick isn’t necessarily buddies with Tara and Rosita but he’s in this room because he’s going to be there for Michonne regardless. Like here’s the Rick Grimes sitting in this room with these ladies because this is where his woman is so this is where he wants to be as well. 😊 I love that they are always such a unit and package deal. 🙌🏾

Three; It’s precious to know how much Rick wants to take care of Michonne. Like this is such a husband and wife moment and you just knew Rick’s going to be dedicated to making sure her healing process is as smooth as possible lol. 

And it’s especially sweet cuz he’s not just sitting by Michonne’s side, he’s holding her hand and just trying to provide some form of TLC cuz Homeboy always wants to be useful and cuz magnets. Here for it. 😋

Four; I adore the little subtle smiles. 😊  

Like y’all these two are the cutest and they make each other so happy. I love that you can always see the gratitude Rick has for Michonne radiating off him and especially here as he smiles and nods he just seems so happy that she’s okay and that she’s still with him.

Five; This moment really parallels the moment when Rick was by Carl’s side when his eye was shot out. 

And I love that we get to see how committed Rick is to his family and that Michonne really does get the same treatment from Rick cuz he knows she’s his immediate family. 

Like she truly does share the place in his heart where his children are and I love that their love goes that deep.

Six; During this whole montage we hear this voice over with Rick and mainly Maggie speaking and I love that the part of the voice over that’s spoken during this Richonne moment is Maggie saying, “That was the decision that changed everything.” in referencing how Glenn saving Rick really started this whole chain of events. 😭 

It’s super sweet and it’s fitting that this line is said over this image of Richonne cuz this line is also super significant for Rick and Michonne too.

Cuz everything in R&M’s journeys led them to each other. And when they came into each other’s lives everything changed and slowly but surely got better for them.

I love that in a world with so much loss, Rick and Michonne still gained something so invaluable when they found each other. And I love how visibly and authentically they cherish what they’ve found in each other. 😊

As I thought about this relationship, even outside of them being a couple, I realized just how crucial and important the character of Michonne is for the character of Rick in this story.

Cuz before she came into the picture, Rick’s relationships were mainly with people who were more like younger siblings or elders. Like he didn’t exactly have someone who was explicitly a peer that he himself could lean on and look to.

But ever since Michonne came into his life it’s allowed us to see a different more free and human Rick. A Rick that even seems new to himself because of how liberated he can be with her. So she really did change everything for him. 👌🏽

And he changed everything for her when he carried her into that prison rather than just take the formula, cuz he gave her a family and she gave him his true self. 😊

I seriously love how Rick and Michonne really have met their match and their equal and their future and their soul mate.

And this closing image of them just let you know that Rick and Michonne are going to stay side-by-side, even if not always physically then mentally, no matter what and for as long as they live. (Which should be a long time since they're the ones who live 😋)

Season 7 really did bless us with some Richonne gold. Like the handling and depiction of Richonne remained quality no matter what else was going on cuz they are the GOAT. 🙌🏾

I feel like seeing this last Richonne moment of season 7 really established that we’re only going to see their bond get more unbreakable and their love get even deeper when they returned back onto our screens. 

Cuz they had a lot thrown at them in this season and yet they only continued to get closer and rise above together. That’s the real deal love, y’all.

And I love that we end their first full season of canon with them side-by-side and more together and in love than ever. 😊

One thing that really impressed me is how after every golden Richonne moment I’d always think there’s no way it’ll get better than this, but it did. They top themselves all the time. 💯👌🏽

Like I saw the Kiss of Life and was like this has to be the best it can get and then we’d get the cell scene and then we’d get the cat callback and then we’d get a whole heavenly episode made of Richonne gold and so much in between. Gift. That. Keeps. On. Giving. 🙌🏾

Rick and Michonne’s scenes, from the fence arrival in season 3 all the way to Rick being by her bedside in this room in season 7, are just so good and meaningful and authentic and special...which makes sense cuz Richonne is all those things too. 😊

So all I know is we’re blessed and I have a feeling we have a lot more Richonne gold coming our way. 😌

Naturally, the obvious way to close out my final post of season seven is to reference a rap verse (??🙈😂), but it just really applies lol, so I just have to say; 

Richonne’s the best yet and yet their best is yet to come. 🙌🏾💯😋

Oh yeah and one more thing y'all...

We Made It!! 🎉🎉🎉

Y’all thank you so much for reading all these posts and for spending the last two months of the hiatus with me!

I started this on August 22nd and was determined to be consistent with my posts all the way until October 22nd to get us to the season 8 premiere. And here we are! 

And I’m seriously so grateful for the support and especially for every comment and message. Like to hear people take time out to express that they enjoyed my posts or that my words actually made them smile or laugh 😂 or see Richonne in a new light made me so happy. And in particular to hear that my thoughts on certain moments were actually something that was looked forward to was really encouraging to me. It all sincerely made my day. 😊🙌🏾 So just know...

I started writing out all my thoughts on Richonne not even knowing if I’d share it. I just had to finally put my analysis and novels-worth of thoughts on paper. And then I thought maybe just maybe someone else would enjoy reading them too since I know how much I enjoy other’s Richonne analysis. 

I meant it in my first post when I said if my break downs just make one person smile it would be worthwhile, so to receive so much kindness and support was such a pleasant surprise and really helped me stay consistent with my goal. 

I was nervous at first cuz I was like what if I sound repetitive or make a mistake since people know so much about them already (and I def did make some mistakes (cannon/canon😂 😂 )) and plus I’m the one who was late to the Richonne party but y’all were still so kind so I ended up having a lot of fun doing this and y’all are a big reason why.

As I wrote these posts I just realized more and more what a masterpiece Richonne is. Like they really are something special. 😊💯 Even their deleted scenes are special, y’all...

And it’s so nice that for as many moments as Richonne has, they’re still not done. 🙌🏾Like I managed to find 99 moments to talk about in regards to Richonne (and I didn’t even go into “Clear” and some of their other great standout pre-canon Richonne moments that I missed in the moment due to being in the sunken place (analysis coming soon😉)) And Richonne isn’t even what the show is all about but they’re that good and make the most of each scene to the point where there can be so much to talk about.

And it’s crazy that in a few hours, we will have some new Richonne gold. 🙉 

And y’all I have no idea what to expect for the premiere, like I really don’t know anything going into this season but I have hope that TWD will remind everyone why this is the show we all fell in love with.

Cuz yes there have been some major missteps made in the series, but at the end of the day it’s undeniable that there was something really special about this show and specifically these characters. So while I’m going into this season with realistic and sober expectations I also believe TWD still has some quality stories left to tell and so here’s to hoping it delivers as best it can.

And the cool thing is that no matter what else happens I know that the Richonne moments we’re going to get are going to deliver like always. 👏 Whether it’s just a few moments or a lot, they’re going to be great. 🏽And I’ll be ready to take note of all of it like…

I’m so touched that some have expressed wanting to know to my season 8 Richonne thoughts and y’all already know I’m gon’ have some thoughts lol. 😂 So my 100th reveling moment will be the first Richonne moment we get in the 100th episode. 👌🏽

So y’all thank you for letting me recap scenes you already know so well. You know how people say “I could go on forever about this”? Thank you for listening to me actually go on forever about Richonne and talk about them in-depth. 

Also thanks for letting me just be my extra and silly self and for letting me say “magnets” a million times in these posts (lol I mean but R&M really are magnets tho 😋)

We all have a story about when this show became more than a show and when Richonne stole our heart so thank you for letting me share mine.

These posts were started cuz I just wanted to share my journey with falling in love with Richonne’s journey. So thanks for going on this little journey with me.

And thanks for reveling with a sister. 💕😊💕

Season 8 Richonne gold here we come! This should be fun. 😋👌🏽

[opheliakeeauthor]

Edits, Catalog revisions

I have over 75% of the saga published. Over 90% of the story is complete at this point. (It really does have an ending, I swear it. Lol) The day job is serious and as much as I love to be in the dream writing, I am getting paid for the work I do. As a professional, I feel it is important to devote my full attention to that during working hours. Sometimes it is really draining and I don't feel much like writing. So I began revising and polishing my stories. I have been rereading the earl stories and letting Grammarly have a go at them. They are very much improved even if the story is the same. I finished the revision of all parts of the miniseries A Pack Forms. It is all live on Amazon now! Also, This weekend Part 1 is FREE. So grab your copy and begin your journey into the dream. 

Weekly Publishing!

Midnight Magic is still publishing. If you are reading on Kindle Unlimited, Part 6 is now available! Julian meets Zephyra. Things take a seriously wrong turn right away and Julian is not so sure that he has not gotten in way over his head. Warning on this miniseries. It is adult themed with some graphic abuse scenes. I know I write some steamy scenes, but I don't always write detailed negative scenes so maybe a bit of a warning is more necessary than it was in previous books. Just as I felt that you needed all of the back story of Frank Grimes in Filth and Death to truly get a feel for how nasty and low Frank really was, I felt it was important to see Julian's whole story and have knowledge of his life at the Wizard's Circle for his story to work well. I always note on Amazon that the books are intended for a mature audience, and like the graphic abuse scenes in The Dark Gift, I felt the ones in Midnight Magic also need a stronger note. Never fear, the HEA is totally present, and you will be seeing more of Zephyra, Julian, Drake, Lorelai, Dross, and Emily in future works. Let me know what you think when you finish reading. Reviews are great. I am real and I do try to reply when you drop me a line. So please feel free to reach out with questions, comments, and suggestions. I love hearing from you. 

Over 250 Titles

I could not believe it when I checked my author central page and realized that I have over 250 short read and complete miniseries titles for sale and to be read with Kindle Unlimited. Thanks to all my readers no matter how you buy and read. It makes my day to see that even one person downloaded a story or read a part of a miniseries. I promise, I won't quit until the saga is finished. (I have to admit that it does kind of mess with my mind how big it got. I was only going to write one book. LMAO! I had no idea.) Sincerest and deepest gratitude to all of my readers. I am humbled that you enjoy my stories.

Author Walk

My Author Walk continues even if it is part time once again. I was not quite able to take a year off and write, but I did get a good ten months. I learned a lot and still have a long way to go in the journey. Now that I am no longer in the dream full time. I hope I have not disappointed anyone. I am still publishing one new short read each week. I am still active most days on Instagram and Facebook if only briefly, but my ability to spend much time on Tumblr, Pinterest, Twitter, or YouTube has been severely limited and reduced to weekends only. So bear with me in response times. Once the job settles in, I hope to be able to be more available and gain more time to actively write. My goal to be able to finish the saga and have it all completely published within the next two years is still on track. Y'all cross your fingers, meditate, or pray. I will get there. I will never complain if you want to share the dream. Please feel free. The more the merrier!

Sneak Peek

I am currently revising the miniseries The Council. It's almost finished and wow, I forgot how good that story really was. So here is a snippet to share. Javier MacGuire was an asshole bad boy who got a second chance at a different life and he might just get his chance at everything. HEA and seriously hot steam in this story, plus you get to see a bit of Fox and Artie's love affair too. When you step into the dream in The Council miniseries, I am sure you will fall in love with the phoenix and her keeper of the flame. This fairy tale got seriously wicked-twisted.

I have to run. The laundry must be hung to dry. If you read, please remember to be kind and leave your reviews. Be Careful! Happy reading, ​Ophelia Kee

[wp-yahoo-style-1042-yahoopa-blog]

Plus size model Tabria Majors can rock the heck out of a swimsuit

(Photo: Tabria Majors/Instagram)

The Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue isn’t stopping with Ashley Graham. While the magazine took a major step in the right direction by crowning their first ever curvy cover girl and rookie of the year in 2016, it’s still making moves towards including more size diverse women. Case in point: the magazine has just added another plus size beauty to its roster.

Tabria Majors was just initiated into Sports Illustrated’s Model Search class for the 2018 Swimsuit Issue. And she can’t contain her excitement.

A lot of you have been asking me about the @si_swimsuit #swimsearch and I am so proud to say that I will be in next year’s issue along with 5 other amazing ladies! Words can’t even describe how excited I am about this opportunity, but I want to thank aaaallllll of you guys bc I couldn’t have gotten here without you

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Oct 4, 2017 at 10:03am PDT

“A lot of you have been asking me about the @si_swimsuit #swimsearch and I am so proud to say that I will be in next year’s issue along with 5 other amazing ladies!” Majors announced the news in an Instagram caption Wednesday. In the photo, she’s wearing a bright blue bikini. “Words can’t even describe how excited I am about this opportunity, but I want to thank aaaallllll of you guys bc I couldn’t have gotten here without you,” she gushed.

Her fans are as elated as she is; there are already 30,000 likes and tons of supportive comments. “[O]f course you will be honey. You are too gorgeous for them to not put you in it. Congrats,” one follower wrote. “Much respects to you, Many more doors will be opening, So get ready:),” said another. “Soooo deserved!!!” wrote a third. “Will be the first swimsuit issue I’ve ever purchased,” said another fan. “You’re such an inspiration, no longer will I talk down on myself for being curvaceous.”

It’s pretty obvious why the publication chose her. Her Instagram is full of stunning swimsuit shots dating back to when an agent discovered her account and signed her two years ago all the way up to her Sports Illustrated casting video, and beyond — and she looks amazing in all of them.

Back in 2015, Majors showed off her grape-catching skills in a gorgeous peach one-piece by the beach.

Grapes, waves, and the sounds of a Sweeterman

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on May 31, 2015 at 8:59am PDT

And a month later, she used a candid photo of herself in a mismatched neon green and blue bikini to talk about body shaming: “207 lbs. I’ve had guys tell me they wouldn’t date me unless I lost weight, someone recently told me I was a twinky away from being obese, and my flaws have been picked apart and scrutinized IRL and on social media. Never let them break you. I ‘do this for the gram,’ but most importantly I do it for myself,” the body positive advocate wrote.

207 lbs. I've had guys tell me they wouldn't date me unless I lost weight, someone recently told me I was a twinky away from being obese, and my flaws have been picked apart and scrutinized IRL and on social media. Never let them break you. I "do this for the gram," but most importantly I do it for myself. I'm always here for support if you need it

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Jun 8, 2015 at 7:52am PDT

She can also do yoga in a bikini! In 2016, she did so in a patterned two-piece with a triangle top. You’ll see her in those a lot; a few months later she posted another even more challenging yoga pose in a similarly shaped bikini. But she also told Galore magazine that she’s a big fan of the retro high-waist bikini. “My least favorite is the conservative skirted one piece,” she said. “[Y]ou might as well just wear a dress in the pool!”

nothing wrong with a thick waist

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on May 3, 2016 at 1:16pm PDT

Your #wcw currently weighs 218, 7lbs down, 8 more to go

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Oct 26, 2016 at 7:36am PDT

A year ago she played volleyball in a camo bikini and opened up about her cellulite. “Quite often when I served during a volleyball match, people would comment on my cellulite to throw me off my game. Didn’t work then, won’t work now,” she boldly wrote.

Quite often when I served during a volleyball match, people would comment on my cellulite to throw me off my game. Didn't work then, won't work now

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Sep 8, 2016 at 9:11am PDT

This past February she wore a two piece with a patterned bandeau top and neon yellow high cut bottoms when calling out Zara for their unrealistic plus-sizing.

I love Zara but their plus size clothing is a joke. These are a XXL On another note, I hope y'all enjoy your Vday and if you wanna know what my standards are when it comes to dating listen to this week's episode (link in bio)

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Feb 14, 2017 at 7:40am PST

In the beginning of the summer, she showed off her love of water in a golden yellow one piece that framed her curves perfectly.

Nostrils full of salt water @igobymindy

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Jun 4, 2017 at 12:27pm PDT

Majors is a major proponent of Aerie and wore one of their swimsuits this summer. “Don’t ever feel like you’re too big to wear a bikini,” she captioned her post. “Flaunt what you got and be proud! I’m happy to say I’m partnering with @Aerie, who supports these ideals.”

Don't ever feel like you're too big to wear a bikini. Flaunt what you got and be proud! I'm happy to say I'm partnering with @Aerie, who supports these ideals. Did you know if YOU post your own photo with #AerieREAL, @Aerie will donate $1 (up to $10K) to @NEDA, a non-profit that supports those affected by eating disorders? Your turn @igobymindy & @eleeraee ! #aeriepartner

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on May 3, 2017 at 11:34am PDT

In May 2017, Majors shared her SI Swimsuit application video, in which she won our hearts in a lavender bikini.

Hey @si_swimsuit! I made this quick video for your consideration! To my followers, can you please help me out by tagging @si_swimsuit @mj_day and #SISwimSearch (And a special shoutout to @rebeccaromijn )

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on May 4, 2017 at 8:23pm PDT

She also shared the news that she made it into the top 15 in July, wearing a bikini, of course.

15 finalists for the #SISwimSearch and big ole me is one of em! Thank you guys so much for helping me get here and stay tuned for more! @si_swimsuit #SISwim

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Jul 13, 2017 at 10:29am PDT

She loves swimsuits so much, she wears them everywhere. She once shot a video rocking a cutout one-piece on the NYC subway.

L train R&B vibes @underground_nyc

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on May 23, 2017 at 12:27pm PDT

In July she shared photos from the first ever SI Swimsuit runway show, in which she walked wearing an orange and purple halter one-piece with a plunging neckline.

I walked in my first ever runway show with @si_swimsuit last night!!! #SISwimSearch

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Jul 21, 2017 at 7:00am PDT

She looked like a goddess in a red Fashion Nova one-piece with high-cut thighs and side cutouts on the beach.

Shortly before this pic was taken a girl rode by on her bike and called me a hippo. A few minutes later another girl walked by and said I was gorgeous. You take the good with the bad and keep pushing. @allgoodthingstv @fashionnova

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Aug 17, 2017 at 12:26pm PDT

She showed she has no insecurities about her body in a Forever 21 one-piece with a huge center cutout that exposed her stomach and underboob. And she looked fierce.

Like…who do I think I am? Lol #underboob @krishphotos HMU @angelalvarado @forever21

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Sep 29, 2017 at 10:32am PDT

And while she could pull off pretty much any type of swimsuit (or clothing, for that matter), this video of her in a pastel itty bitty bikini reading what trolls have said about her body in funny voices is our favorite. It shows she can laugh at herself, and loves herself. “I don’t care if you hate my body because I love it.”

I'm Tabria Majors, I weigh 218 lbs, and I don't care if you hate my body because I love it

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Aug 1, 2017 at 6:44pm PDT

Basically, this woman was made for this, making the wait to see the statement she makes in the 2018 SI Swimsuit issue even harder to bare.

Waiting on this eclipse like @si_swimsuit #SISwimSearch

A post shared by Tabria Majors (@tabriamajors) on Aug 21, 2017 at 11:26am PDT

Read more from Yahoo Lifestyle:

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Red lipstick helped me learn to love my lips

Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter for nonstop inspiration delivered fresh to your feed, every day.

[womenofcolor15]

Trey Songz & Meek Mill Get Into It On Social Media After Trigga Called Out Meek To Donate To Charity + Eminem Apologizes To Diddy’s REVOLT

Trey Songz and Meek Mill got into a semi-feud online after Trigga called Meek out to donate to charity. Check those receipts, plus find out why Eminem is apologizing to Diddy’s REVOLT network inside….

Trey Songz and Meek Mill were lightly feuding on social media recently. The reason? Giving back to charity.

Here’s what went down….

Right now, people need help during this pandemic, so celebs and real-life YBFers have been putting their resources together to help those in need. Trigga decided he would participate in the #FeedYourCommunityChallenge and he called out Meek to join in. However, the spat likely started with the way the R&B crooner approached the Philly rapper about donating.

Recently, Meek shared a picture of himself holding several hundred dollar bills. Trigga hopped in his comments and asked Meek to donate those “bands” to a good cause.

"Take some of them bands and accept the #feedyourcommunitychallenge," the “Bottoms Up” singer wrote in Meek’s comments along with the thinking emoji.

        View this post on Instagram

                  Ain’t no such thing as being real with people that’s tryna use you!

A post shared by Meek Mill (@meekmill) on Jun 24, 2020 at 9:38am PDT

  After peeping Trey's comment, Meek responded:

"200k to Philadelphia schools ... my phantom for less fortunate 400k .... and help raise 50 mill for reform @treysongz don't try me like that!."

In another comment, Meek also wrote, "I donated like two mill this year where you at? Lol."

The day before, Trey also dedicated an IG post to challenge Meek to feed his city:

          View this post on Instagram

                  I challenge my boy @meekmill to the #feedyourcitychallenge bull a young God in Philly. Let’s go!!!

A post shared by treysongz (@treysongz) on Jun 23, 2020 at 7:52pm PDT

  "I challenge my boy @meekmill to the #feedyourcitychallenge bull a young God in Philly. Let’s go!!!," the R&B singer captioned a picture of himself giving back to his community.

After Meek responded to Trigga in the comments about his philanthropic donations, Trey then shared a screenshot on his IG, questioning why the CHAMPIONSHIPS rapper took offense to him challenging him.

        View this post on Instagram

                  So @meekmill apparently felt a way bout me challenging him to the #feedyourcitychallenge. He felt the need to tell me what he’s already done, hopefully not realizing I tapped on him because of how much I know he’s already doing for his community. That’s great you donated fam, that’s great you helping prison reform, that’s great you gave ya phantom. I’m simply trying to bring us together to further help our communities. You offended? Lol you got it!

A post shared by treysongz (@treysongz) on Jun 24, 2020 at 11:13am PDT

"What you feel attacked?," Trey asked in Meek's comments. "I know what you doing for your community that's what I challenged you. I'm at everybody to do they part and more, you included. Ima try whoever bout what I'm on right now. Feel how you feel."

He captioned the screenshot, "So @meekmill apparently felt a way bout me challenging him to the #feedyourcitychallenge. He felt the need to tell me what he’s already done, hopefully not realizing I tapped on him because of how much I know he’s already doing for his community. That’s great you donated fam, that’s great you helping prison reform, that’s great you gave ya phantom. I’m simply trying to bring us together to further help our communities. You offended? Lol you got it!"

Meek didn't like the way he went about the challenge and explained that to him in a comment under the screenshot.

"Nah I didn't don't try to put me on the spot wit that sideways shit that's not even no money like four racks ... other artist telling artist to donate is dumb just handle ya business!," Meek said. "Don't try to put me on the spot .. this behavior kinda of new artist don't speaking on my money ... coulda kept this in the comments bro I just ain't feel your comment no big deal."

Trey then responded it wasn't that big of a deal and that he had challenged several other artists, including Fabolous and more.

"@meekmill I hit ya phone, both numbers I got and I sent a dm. It's a challenge nigga. Same way I challenged Mustard, Fab, Trouble and they all accepted. We aint even sposta be at no kinda odds abut giving back. Shit goofy," he said.

There's no beef between them, according to Meek. He said the thinking emoji is what made him think Trey was trying to be shady:

  Me and trey bro’s that lil threw me off tho!

— Meek Mill (@MeekMill) June 24, 2020

  Oh, and by the way....

  And to think you was the one locking blacks up in nyc at one point! https://t.co/O03gucr5XO

— Meek Mill (@MeekMill) June 24, 2020

  The Philly rapper clapped back at former NYC Mayor Rudy Giuliani who has been busy trying to inflict fear into people about the Black Lives Matter movement.

In other "beef" news...

          View this post on Instagram

                  Now back to our movement.

A post shared by REVOLT TV (@revolttv) on Jun 22, 2020 at 3:29pm PDT

  OOOP! What did Eminem do to piss REVOLT off? Lyrics!

On Conway the Machine's track "Bang," Eminem took a shot at Diddy's cable network, REVOLT.

"Yeah, shout to Puffy Combs, but f*ck Revolt," the 47-year-old rapped about the black-owned network on the leaked track. "Y'all are like a f*cked up remote. Now I get it why our button's broke."

REVOLT didn't mince words on how they felt about Em's lyrics. They shared an IG post that said, "F*ck you too Eminem."

The cable network then released a statement to address Eminem's disrespectful lyrics.

"Why does Eminem, someone who is a guest in Black culture, think he can talk down to REVOLT," the cable network said in a statement to Billboard. "REVOLT is a BLACK media company, owned by a Black entrepreneur, with a majority Black team -- that is authentic and real."

"Eminem trying to come for us is an unneeded distraction. It is not OK. We need to be supported to be the platform and voice of this movement," it continued.

True indeed. Em agreed the bars were an "unnecessary distraction" from the Black Lives Matter movement and publicly apologized:

  In response to @revolttv... pic.twitter.com/XrFJi2BZDy

— Marshall Mathers (@Eminem) June 25, 2020

  "I was heated in the moment and thought better of it and decided to pull it back," Em explained. "Stuff that I never intended to release continues to leak from the huge WeTransfer hack."

There's that. We all have to stick together during these times. We have BIGGER issues to fight.

Photos: Trey's IG/Meek's IG

[Read More ...] source http://theybf.com/2020/06/25/trey-songz-meek-mill-get-into-it-on-social-media-after-trigga-called-meek-out-to-donate-t