#kind of wish i'd asked for a copy of their pictures

[shen-daozhang]

not to get like real life on here, but turns out I have a 6cm cyst in one ovary, and a 3cm cyst in the other. Which, you know, explains some things.

Which I also feel like is a commentary on people who live with chronic pain, the fact that I've had this for so long and just kind of lived with it, and only very recently thought "hey the fact that I'm in agony close to 24/7 is maybe something I should get checked out?"

[cherepizza]

Wow it's been more than a month. Didn't realize that. I guess I have something to show but uhh my sketchbook got under heavy rain so paper here it's a little wavy. It's a miracle it had so little damage considering what happened to my other stuff. Also nights proceed to get longer and I wasn't lucky to take better photos. Anyway..

All beacons' religions are based on mythology and existence of numerous gods and spirits inhabiting the world. The closest thing they have to monotheism is a religion formed around the existence of a transcendent all-present force (spirit) which, however, cannot perceive the world and interact with it by itself, only being able to do so by splitting itself into many different "sides". Only sides are able to maintain physical bodies and though they all come from the same source and it the end would become one again, they are treated as completely different entities. There're 8 major sides – 8 major gods, other deities are considered lesser. Aand I'll just leave it there because I'd better wait for the time I have a fine picture depicting gods to have at least something accompany a ton of sentences that would come describing them.

Many religions practices and ceremonies are performed at altars. The most simple home altar is a wooden table, low enough so that a beacon would have to kneel down to perform any ritual. The most common offering is food, other offerings include things associated with a specific god. Watered down alcohol may be poured only on certain celebrations. It's a very uncommon practice and in some households it's not allowed and has to be done secretly. After all, you want your gods to be sober to do their duty.

Living creatures sacrifices are also practiced, but sacrificing other beacons is forbidden (at least on the territory of the forementioned "all comes from one spirit" believers). Animals cannot be sacrificed on wooden altars and it's quite rare for a beacon to a have a stone one at home, so cooking and eating a designated animal or specific parts of it (obviously offering a piece to the gods in the process) on a celebration is usually enough.

An interesting religious thing are these sticks made from wood or bone, always coming in number of 8. If their owner didn't make them themselves, they may have some standard decorations and phrases pre-carved but most part of their sides would always remain empty for the owner to fill. Each stick is devoted to one of the major gods and contains an encarved list of things which a beacon wants to ask for from the deity. An altar is not needed when you have sticks but you should still make an offering if possible.

The sticks also serve as some sort of passport as encarvings may contain information about beacon's place of birth, place of work, profession, number of children and other things like the kind of crop their village grows even if the owner has nothing to do with farming but wants the crop to be protected anyway.

All stick sets are personal and follow their owner to the grave. However, taking copies is not frowned upon. Keeping the original set for yourself and leaving a copy with the deseased is also fine but the ritual of changing sets should be performed by close relatives who wish to keep the original sticks as a memory. Otherwise it might be considered disrespectful.

[kg2hub]

🎭 Kindergala Starter Prompts!

here's a collection of prompts you can send into people's ask boxes to interact with them if you don't know what to say, or find it easier to just copy & paste something and send it!! :D

ofc, feel free to change, alter, or expand on these prompts if needed! these are all for different scenarios, but i'm sure you can figure which ones are which from context :'''D

❝Your mask is cool! What's it supposed to be of?❞

❝Ew. What are you doing here?❞

❝Are you... supposed to be me?❞

❝Oh my god. I am so sorry! I didn't mean to spill my drink on you!❞

❝This is really weird... You remind me of someone I know. But different.❞

❝Have we met before?❞

❝There's so many people... I'm getting kind of nervous.❞

❝What are you doing all by yourself? The party's over there.❞

❝Is it really you...? I thought you were dead!❞

❝Oh no, you are not getting the last slice of cake if I have anything to say about it! It's mine!❞

❝Fancy seeing you here. I didn't think we'd meet again.❞

❝I didn't know they let plebians in.❞

❝Why are you so old?❞

❝I remember being that young. I wouldn't ever go back to that.❞

❝Excuse me? I don’t think that's a very nice thing to say.❞

❝I noticed you staring at me for a while... Why?❞

❝I thought I should say hi to everyone here! So hi!❞

❝What even is up with all this multiverse stuff... Have you ever thought about it, like, on a philosophical level?❞

❝So... any mysteries from your world you can spill about to a total stranger?❞

❝I'm under a lot of stress here, so can you stop being so annoying!?❞

❝Do you think past lives are real?❞

❝How do you feel about dying?❞

❝I wish I got a better mask... Mine doesn't fit me that well.❞

❝You're carrying a lot of food there! Need some help?❞

❝Man... I hate the 'no violence' rule. Do you know what I'd do if that wasn't a thing?❞

❝You look like you're having fun! Can I join you?❞

❝You just look like you need some company. I can sit with you for however long you need.❞

❝Did you bring a date for the gala?❞

❝I'd really like to dance with you... Do you feel the same?❞

❝So. We're in the void, huh? I've never been here before...❞

❝You have a nice outfit. Very fancy! I want your style so bad!❞

❝I feel kind of silly, all dressed up for something like this... How about you?❞

❝I came here alone... Can I hang out around you and just be friends for tonight?❞

❝Whoa, hold up! What are you doing?? Isn't that dangerous!?❞

❝I'm about to pull the biggest prank ever, but I need some help. Are you in?❞

❝I bet I can chug all the punch in less than a minute. Wanna watch?❞

❝I'm glad I'm here with you. I'm glad we're here. Coming to this place with you was the best idea, truly."

❝—Wait, is it your birthday? Happy birthday!! Good place to have your party, huh?❞

❝I didn't actually want to come... I was dragged here, kicking and screaming.❞

❝I didn't think I'd have this much fun, but I am!❞

❝Hold on for a second— Your mask is crooked. And there's no mirror nearby... Can I fix it for you?❞

❝...Have you been in the bathroom this whole time?❞

❝Where have you been!? I've missed you!❞

❝Hey, my favourite song's on! Have you ever heard of them?❞

❝Do you think we'll get kicked out if we put ghost pepper powder on all the food and drinks?❞

❝There's so much space to run around and be free! Let loose a little, okay?❞

❝I guess we can't play hide and seek here... Unless you can turn invisible or something. —Wait, can you turn invisible??❞

❝I challenge you to a duel!❞

❝I wanna dance so bad... I'm so scared, though. I'll probably look terrible. I have zero sense of rhythm! I can't dance!❞

❝My group needs someone to take our picture! Can you do it? We'll treat you after, if you want!❞

❝I can't believe I cancelled plans for this.❞

❝Wow... How are you so cool?? I can't believe I'm meeting someone like you!❞

❝What did one mask say to the other? 'I got you covered!'❞

❝I don't think I've been this... calm... in a long time.❞

❝You have such a beautiful smile.❞

❝Jeez, you look like you really need to talk to someone. Like a therapist, maybe?❞

❝I took too much food at the snack bar... Do you want some? Please? I'm begging you, I seriously can't eat all this myself—❞

❝Do you ever know someone, but you don't really know them?❞

❝We might have gotten off on the wrong foot. Can we start over?❞

❝You just arrived? Welcome to the Kindergala! You're a bit late, so the dessert might be all gone if we don't hurry—!❞

❝Did anyone lose a wallet?❞

❝—Hey, is this yours? You dropped this while you were walking.❞

❝I am not cute. Don't you dare call me that.❞

❝I always do something funny before a picture is taken so the smiles are more genuine.❞

❝I thought there would be more adults here. Why is this a daycare??❞

❝The real question is... Where's Waldo?❞

❝...I can't read this. Can you read? What does it say?❞

❝...Sorry, who are you, again?❞

❝Come on, don't look at me like that!❞

❝Coming here was a lot nicer than I thought it'd be!❞

❝This place is so... away from everything. Like, in a good way. It's cozy and quiet— Can I stay here too?❞

❝Would anyone notice if we just take a nap, right here, right now?❞

❝I... brought a gift for you. I hope you like it! Here you go!❞

❝You should let your hair down more often.❞

[dollywheeler]

October 7th, 1996

Dear diary,

Will gave us back our assignments today and he really liked it! I can't help but feel like his opinion is biased though, which is kind of a bummer. I mean, I'm glad that I got a good grade and I'm proud of it so I feel like it deserves the grade it got, but... I don't know. I feel like it would have been more satisfying if it had been graded by someone who hadn't spent Friday night fondueing marshmallows with me at his own dinner table.

Same happens in English now - I always take pride in my essays, but it's hard not to worry that Mike's taking it easy on me, even when he said he wouldn't.

At least I gave Will the copy of Morning Glory after we already got our grades back because that would have been even more damning. Which is exactly why I waited until lunch to pass by his classroom and hand over the tape I'd made as promised, away from prying eyes. Danny walked with me - I'd told him all about our dinner on Saturday over the phone - and in hindsight I probably should have known to expect Mike would be there as well.

They were having lunch together at Will's desk, and through the window I could see them startle as we knocked, but quickly smiled and waved us in when they noticed it was me. As soon as we stepped into the classroom I could tell that Mike was sizing up Danny, even though he already knows him from his English class, and knows he's perfectly smart and polite. He didn't say anything and his expression didn't give anything away as he shifted his attention back to me.

I have to say it's kind of weird having that kind of ... consideration? It's sounds strange and might not make sense but... I've never had a brother before - not like that at least. As annoyed as I want to be over him scrutinizing my life - which he still has no business doing by the way and if he even tries to meddle I will strangle him - it feels nice to have someone watching out for me.

Not that I need protecting from Daniel of all people - he's the sweetest, most considerate boy I know. He's always smiling and it's genuine. I've never met anyone who seems so genuinely happy and kind at all times. It's kind of amazing to see.

But anyway, I gave him the tape and after he'd thanked me I just had to ask Mike if he'd seen the painting Will had made in class.

He'd given us this new assignment - we're back on paint, thank god - and Will had used the projector to show us some new techniques we could try out. He'd started drawing a face from memory and it slowly became obvious that it was Mike - or well, Mr. Wheeler for everyone else in the class. He paused and blinked for a second and then he added antennae and turned him into an alien, making everyone laugh. I don't even think he'd realised what he'd been drawing until he'd seen the whole picture, turning him into an alien to make fun and distract everyone. I wish I could draw like that though - just get lost in a trance and see where my mind ends up. I feel like it would help clear up a messy mind.

Anyway, after he was done with the sketch and actually got around to showcasing the paint techniques - using blues and greens to stick to the alien theme - it actually turned out really cool.

As expected, Will squirmed in embarrassment as I brought up the painting but he pulled it out for Mike and Danny who of course thought it funny as well. And seriously, Will is crazy talented - even this silly five minute painting was insanely well done.

We talked for a while, but Daniel and I still had to get lunch so eventually we had to join the others in the cafeteria.

By the time we got to seventh period English, Mike had hung up the painting in his classroom. He even had a frame for it and everything!

Seriously, where did he get that thing on such short notice?

Love, Holly

[the-boy-meets-evil]

come sail away | ksj (18+)

pairing: seokjin x f. reader genre(s): enemies to lovers (one-sided) | smut, angst (light), fluff rating: explicit, minors DNI! word count: ~7.8k written for: catch of the century - thank you so so much for letting me participate! (and sorry my summary changed lol) summary: kim seokjin is the captain of a sailing team bound for one of the biggest regattas around. only one problem: that team also includes taehyung, who's incredibly accident prone. will he let you save the day despite your history? warnings: drinking, swearing, mentions of past hook-up, seokjin is kind of an idiot, taehyung is clumsy, slight mention of side vmin smut warnings: explicit smut, oral sex (f. receiving), fingering, vaginal penetration, slight mentions of breast play?, they're both in control, reader calls jin baby one (1) time, i think that's it a/n: this fic was kind of a beast and i wish i'd gotten it posted by our beloved jin's birthday but what can you do? thank yous: @ugh-yoongi, @hot-soop, and @effortandmore for being wonderful friends and also keeping me sane/suffering with me (sorry jewel, i copied you)

Everything in the world has finally aligned. The stars and the universe and maybe one or two things closer to Earth. It’s not worth stopping to think about it too closely. Only one thing matters. Kim Seokjin has qualified for one of the biggest regattas in the world.

Well, his team has. But, he’s their captain, and the face of the team, if you will, so he’s taking this as his win. And when you stop to think about it, he’s hand-picked every person that he sails with, spent hours making sure that not only does he have the best people, but that they also work well together. He’s watched teams fold over a stupid argument and he’s determined not to fall victim to that. 

No, this team is perfect and he’s not letting anything stand in the way. They’ve had their ups and downs in the past, plenty of almosts. Not this time. This is their year and he can almost taste it. This is the year that other teams start taking his seriously and stop calling them almost.

Especially your team. Seokjin pictures your face when he finally beats you in a major regatta and it’s probably the best thing he’s seen, might even be better than sex. It’s been at least 10 years of you somehow managing to beat him when it really matters, sometimes in the final few minutes, and he’s had enough. 

The news calls for a celebration, at the very least. Actually, Seokjin would rather be planning and looking into conditions, making sure that they tackle this as best they can. Taehyung and Jungkook wanted to celebrate and Yoongi, the eternal sunshine that he is, didn’t care what they did. Since neither Jin nor Yoongi could ever dissuade Taehyung from anything, they were sitting at their favorite bar. 

Seokjin looks over at the door and sees the last person he’s expecting walk in. You. Sure, he’s riding a high from the news of making the cut and he’s several drinks in, but he still thinks that you could ruin the night. And you seem like you’re looking for someone, not like you just wandered in by accident, which sets his nerves on edge. Who are you looking for? As your eyes land on his table, he looks away immediately. No, you’re not raining on his parade.

“Who invited her?” Jin asks in a low, biting whisper. 

It’s Hoseok who speaks up after looking toward the door. “Oh! I did!” 

His voice is full of cheer, smile not even fading when Seokjin casts Hoseok his most venomous look. Maybe he’s not doing it right or maybe he’s just not as scary as he likes to imagine he is. Or Maybe Hoseok, who’s known Seokjin for nearly 20 years, isn’t bothered.

In another second, you’re at the table hugging Hoseok and smiling around at everyone else. Like you’re supposed to be there. Like this isn’t weird. Like you hang out with them all the time. Like you don’t hate him and wish nothing but bad fortune on him at every turn. Okay, maybe the last one is dramatic but you’re rivals for a reason.

“Congrats! Hobi told me you’d been selected,” you say and sit down close to Hoseok.

Seokjin almost can’t believe his ears. What kind of tactic is this? You can’t just be happy for them, that doesn’t line up with everything that he knows about you. Which, admittedly, isn’t all that much. He’s been around you plenty, sure, just never listened all that closely.

“Thanks,” Jungkook says easily.

“Looks like we’ll be going up against each other again,” Seokjin says with all the pride he’s felt the whole time.

“What?” Your eyebrows are knotted in confusion when he makes eye contact with you. It annoys Seokjin because what right do you have to be looking at him that way? Is this a game to you?

“In the Regatta?” Seokjin says, biting back the tone of annoyance as best he can.

“Oh, hadn’t you heard? I didn’t enter a team this year,” you say, your tone casual. You’re not even really focused, more worried about stealing some of Hoseok’s drink and then pulling up your face when it’s too sweet. Seokjin is searching for something deeper. Are you just testing him? Is this some kind of pity since you’ve beaten him so many times?

The only question that comes out of his mouth is, “why?”

“Well Eunji is pregnant so she can’t really train right now and Chan fell in love and said he wants to focus on that for now,” you say with a shrug. “I didn’t really have time to replace them with anyone I trusted, which is fine, there’s always next year.”

And there was always next year for you. It was like you made the cut every year, sometimes without even seeming like you were trying. It was infuriating to see you so casual about missing it this year. Seokjin’s sure he checked the teams competing, but maybe he hadn’t looked that closely. All he can do now is fight to make sure it doesn’t seem like he’s bothered by your lack of participation. 

With Seokjin so deep in his thoughts, he misses a lot of the next bits of the conversation. He doesn’t see you watch him for a moment before turning back to Hoseok. He doesn’t see Taehyung get up to seek out the pretty stranger he’s been watching across the bar. He doesn’t even see Yoongi order them another round until there’s a fresh drink in front of him, which he downs too fast. 

This night isn’t going anything like he expects. Well, except for Taehyung. His friend is nowhere to be found and there’s a text in the group chat not to worry about him. They aren’t scheduled to practice tomorrow so it’s not unlike him to run off with a pretty face. Seokjin spares a passing thought that it’ll be nice if this one lasts a little longer because Taehyung deserves that. Jungkook is trying to convince Yoongi to sing karaoke with him, which is never going to happen. Well, unless Yoongi wants to impress someone by busting out a rap. Doesn’t seem likely tonight. What Seokjin really needs is another drink.

“You seem particularly upset about me missing the Regatta,” a smooth voice says from beside Seokjin along the bar. He knows it’s you without turning and turns anyway, taking in your eyes alight with something he can’t place.

“It just seems like a shame, I feel bad you’re down 2 team members is all,” Seokjin says, hoping it comes out even.

“Mhm,” you hum, quiet enough that he might miss it if he weren’t still watching you.

Stupid of him, he thinks. There’s no reason to be watching you. At least not that closely.

“I don’t know what else you expect me to say,” Seokjin says and turns away towards the bar again.

“What’s got your panties in a twist?” You ask, a little challenging, a little annoying, completely on brand for you.

“Nothing,” Seokjin says, trying and failing to unclench his jaw before the answer pushes out.

“Are you…mad I’m not competing?” You’re getting far too much delight out of this.

“You know it’s not the same if…” Seokjin starts and then clenches his jaw again, not wanting to give you the satisfaction.

“This whole competition thing is getting old,” you say with a sigh and Seokjin looks over again to see you really don’t seem engaged anymore.

“Not when we’re always competing,” Seokjin says and you shake your head.

“I win some, you win some, then it’s over and we have lives outside of the competition,” you say and Seokjin scoffs.

“Easy to say when you’re usually the one winning, at least the ones that matter,” Seokjin says and you move closer.

“I thought we’d worked on this, you know, when we…” you say.

“No, we’re not talking about that,” Seokjin says quickly, scanning to see if anyone else is listening.

Okay, so here’s the thing. The Big Secret that Seokjin doesn’t want anyone to know because it would ruin the image he’s carefully built up. Every chance he gets, he talks about not liking you, about thinking you’re evil and the enemy. And there’s no fraternizing with the enemy, that’s been rule number 1 as long as Seokjin has been captain. It’s inevitable that teams run into each other. There are only so many good areas to train and only so many places to spend your free time. That’s all fine. Anything beyond that breaks the rules.

Seokjin is a fucking hypocrite too, apparently, because he broke the rule in a pretty major way. It was late one night and the bar was emptying. Admittedly, he was feeling a little down because he’d just gone through a breakup and the one person he tried talking to at the bar was a resounding failure, not something Seokjin ever really experienced. He wasn’t drunk, just pleasantly buzzed, taking the edge off of what felt like two separate rejections. That was where you came in. Initially, it was any other time where you both jabbed back and forth before you realized that Seokjin really wasn’t in the mood. Then you listened.

You were actually a really good listener, Seokjin discovered. You were sympathetic, not judgmental at all, and you had good insight. You were patient too, as he rambled on repeating the same bits of the story because he was kind of angry about the whole thing. Nobody liked feeling rejected, but Seokjin took it especially personally. He invited you back to his apartment for another drink before even realizing what he was doing and you agreed just as quickly. 

Fuck, Seokjin was only human and even though he was one of the most stubborn people in the world, he wasn’t blind. You looked good that night, full lips painted red, big eyes looking up seductively under your thick lashes, leaning just a little too close into his space so he was sure to notice how good you smelled. He can’t remember who closed the gap first. It really might have been him. But he couldn’t bring himself to care when you felt that good.

He’d told you then that it couldn’t happen again and you definitely couldn’t talk about it. There was no way the rest of his team could not what happened. Not only would they never let him hear the end of it, it’d be harder to enforce any team rules too. Sometimes it seemed like you just wanted to bring it up to see his reaction. Or cause some sort of trouble if someone overheard you.

This time you just raise your eyebrows and work to control a smirk. “You’re no fun.”

Seokjin is torn about responding to this because on the one hand, he is really fun and he wants to say that. But that definitely leaves a door open that he’s not interested. Maybe. He’s probably better off ordering another drink.

The drink might actually be a bad idea because now he’s feeling bolder. Everyone in his group is otherwise engaged when he finds himself sitting next to you. He leans in without thinking, continuing the earlier conversation. “I think we both know that I’m very fun.”

He doesn’t have time to think about if it’s a good idea or not (it’s not) before you slowly turn your head to look at him, smirk back in place. Fuck. Instead of catching you off guard, he’s played right into your hand. You briefly suck your lower lip between your teeth, thinking. 

Before he can react, you’re leaning into him, lips close to his ear under the guise of it being loud in there (it is, but not that loud). The warm breath sends a shiver through him that he barely manages to contain.

“I think I’ve forgotten how much fun you can be, can you remind me?” 

The question is loaded. And it’s a terrible idea. Monumentally awful. Yet, Seokjin can’t even fight the heat that raises up the back of his neck at your words. He doesn’t trust himself to speak even once you’ve pulled back to study him from a much more respectable distance. All he can do is nod.  

The next moment, the spell seems slightly broken when you stand up and smile casually at nobody in particular. You announce you’re leaving, give out a few hugs, and leave without a backwards glance at Seokjin. He’s starting to think that he must have imagined the whole exchange. Or maybe it was real but you’re just toying with him. It’s stupid to think that anything is going to happen.

Then he gets a text message with an address and apartment code, telling you to wait at least ten or fifteen minutes before excusing yourself. That is, if you’re still up for the challenge.

It shouldn’t get his heart racing the way it does. Shouldn’t tempt him the way it does. One time can be a mistake, just a casual slip in judgment and nothing more. A second time gets a little more complicated. That’s not a mistake.

But Seokjin is just on the other side of buzzed and doesn’t really feel like making the right decision, whatever that is. He wants to feel good and he knows you can definitely do that. So he makes his exit as well, saying how he needs to make sure he still gets his beauty sleep and that he’s got things to do tomorrow. Nobody spares it a second thought and he’s on his way to your apartment. Again. 

He shows up at your door and you pull him inside without saying anything. It’s unusual for him to feel this out of his element, this unsure. You don’t seem to mind making up for it, pulling him straight back into your bedroom and lightly pushing him onto the bed. The next moment, you’re straddled over his lap, unbuttoning his shirt as you slowly kiss up his neck. He runs his hands up your thighs, squeezing when you nip at his neck. 

It’s too much and not enough, all at the same time. Seokjin moves one hand behind your neck to direct your lips to his, an urgency behind it. You kiss him hard and take advantage of his little gasp to slide your tongue into his mouth, deepening the kiss. In the midst of the kiss, you finish unbuttoning his shirt, sliding it off his body. 

You break the kiss and lean back to appreciate his body and the smooth lines of muscle that tense under your fingers as they skim across his skin. You’re entirely in control and Seokjin can’t help but be turned on by it. It’s not that he minds giving up control, exactly, because he doesn’t. It’s just so much more to give up control to someone he’s not sure he even likes when you’re both fully clothed. His attention is back on you as you remove your shirt and unhook your bra, discarding both to the floor. 

You guide Seokjin’s plush lips to one of your breasts and he immediately flicks his tongue out against your nipple, earning a shudder in response. He takes his time with each breast before kissing up your chest to your neck. The kisses get messier, more frantic, more filled with need. Seokjin craves the skin to skin contact of your chests as he pulls you flush against him. With his hands still firmly gripping your hips, he feels when you start to slightly rolls against him. The material keeping the two of you apart isn’t nearly enough friction, but your movements have him getting hard.  

It’s not enough though. You’re stunning and Seokjin loves to hear the little moans that he pulls out of you. But he needs more. He puts his hands under your thighs and flips you around so your back is on the bed, head on a pillow. It takes you a second to realize what he’s doing and then you’re undoing your jeans, pulling them and your underwear down in one movement. The second they’re added to the pile of already discarded clothes, your hand is on the back of Seokjin’s neck, guiding him back to you. He only lets you nip at his lip once before he’s pulling away again. It’s pure pleasure to see you pout before he begins trailing kisses down your body. 

Once he reaches your inner thighs, you’re impatient again, trying to push his head where you need it most. But as fun as it is to see you needy, it’s even better to push you toward the edge. His tongue slowly reaches out, running lazily up your slit. And fuck, you’re wet. But he continues teasing, just slowly moving his tongue and ignoring your attempts to get him to move faster. Teasing you like this might be his new favorite thing.

The sounds you make as Seokjin finally licks into your cunt have him already hardening. They’re slow, purposeful movements, just enough to drive you even crazier. Your fingers grip tighter in his hair and your back arches when runs his tongue over your clit, sucking it into his mouth. 

“Fuck Seokjin, are you trying to kill me?”

He’s not, not really, he just really enjoys you squirming as he works you up. Enjoys taking his time with you, starting at a painfull slow pace. A thought that he’s not going to give too much attention. 

“Please, please, please, I need more,” you beg. 

Well, it’d be cruel to deny you that. He slowly inserts a finger while still focusing his mouth on your clit. Your hips buck against his hand and he knows it’s not enough, that it’s too slow, that you want him to go faster, but he keeps the movements slow. His finger slides in and out easily. Your want is so plain. He slides another finger in and you clench around him.

Fuck. He’s definitely straining against his pants now.

He doesn’t want to draw it out anymore, just wants to feel your release. He inserts another finger and curls them immediately. The moan that comes out at that is halfway to a scream and he knows he’s hitting where you need him. And he knows you’re close, just a little bit farther. He’s pumping his fingers in and out of you fast now, encouraged by your moans and the string of swears dripping from your lips, everything a half finished thought. He’s still working over your clit, alternating between a flick of the tongue and sucking it into his mouth.

Your other hand grips into his hair and your whole body starts to shake as you release. All he wants is to watch you unravel knowing that it’s thanks to him, but he continues pumping his fingers, guiding you though it. 

As soon as you come back down, you pull his face up to yours. Your lips are on his before he can think about anything else, both breathing heavy and not caring if the kiss is a little sloppy. Your hands leave his to quickly undo his pants and slide them down along with his boxers. Seokjin breaks the kiss to remove them the rest of the way. 

He can’t help the whine that escapes his lips when your finger slides over his tip, spreading the precum over the rest of his cock. And he’s thinking about those lips of yours wrapped around his cock again. Just like last time. Fuck, you’ve got such a pretty mouth. His cock twitches a little thinking about it. Or maybe it’s the way you start to work him over.

But no, he wants you and he wants you now. 

“Do you have a condom?” Seokjin asks and you raise an eyebrow, hand stilling.

You nod at the drawer. “In there.”

Seokjin pulls one out, unwrapping it and sliding it on as quick as he can.

“Someone is eager,” you say and he wants to protest.

And he would’ve, if you hadn’t pushed him back onto the bed. Any retort dying on his lips as he watches you straddle him, hands using his chest for stability. You don’t bother to ask if it’s okay as you line yourself up, his face must’ve told you all you needed to know. You slowly lowered yourself onto him and he gripped your hips hard, not even caring if he left a mark. Maybe he wanted to leave a mark, make sure you remember this night.

But fuck. He’d forgotten how good it felt to be inside you. Once you adjusted, you find your pace, slowly moving up and down. You’re rolling your body so smoothly as you allow him to come almost all the way out of you before sinking back onto his cock. Seokjin thinks how hot it is to look up at you while you fuck him. It’s dangerous too, having you on top of him like this, completely in control. It lets his mind wander, just slightly, to think of how he might actually like to do this much more. Might like to take his time with you. Spend the night.

No.

Pretending it’s just too slow, Seokjin flips the two of you so he’s hovering over you instead, caging you in with his much larger frame. You run your nails appreciatively over his broad shoulders and he shivers. He needs the pace to be faster, needs to get out of his own head. You either don’t mind or don’t notice the slight daze before Seokjin picks up the pace. 

It’s so fast, bodies slamming together and sweat starting to bead. You’re so tight around him that it’s like he can feel every movement and it only adds to the feeling. Even as your head tips back, Seokjin can’t stop looking at you. Memorizing the sight of you beneath him. Your hands slide down his sides and over his back to grip his ass and he groans again. He can tell your close by the way you’re meeting his thrusts, finding a perfect rhythm again and chasing another release.

You cum again, hard. Your nails are digging into him as the orgasm works through you and he has the fleeting thought hoping it’ll actually leave marks. Another thrust and he can feel himself at the edge. 

“Come on, baby, cum for me,” you say, voice completely fucked.

“Fuck me,” Seokjin utters because that was hot. And he liked it too much. He doesn’t remember you calling him baby the last time he fucked you.

He thrusts several more times and then stills inside you, breathing heavy from the pace. His arms feel shaky where they still hold him suspended over you.

“It’s okay Jin, you’re not gonna crush me,” you say, soft and almost sweet, gently running your fingers up his arms to his shoulders. 

He tries to scoff but instead, he just listens and lowers himself down onto your body. You’re both tacky with sweat and neither of you seems to care. It’s easy, far easier than it should be, to just lay there in bed with you. But that’s a problem for Tomorrow Seokjin. Tonight, Seokjin is just going to enjoy being in this moment as long as he can.

The last place that Seokjin wanted to go that night was a club that couldn’t decide if it wanted to be a strip club judging by the poles at the edges of the dance floor. Not because he objected, he absolutely did not. It was just that he knew Taehyung’s new obsession was a dancer. Which meant that Jimin would probably dance on the pole. And that was fine, really, because he had mentioned classes. He knew what he was doing. Who couldn’t appreciate someone that moved with that much grace? Taehyung, on the other hand, did not know what he was doing.

Sadly, Seokjin’s objections fell on deaf ears and Taehyung tried to imitate the relatively intricate moves, including hanging upside down. Which resulted in him falling and having to be rushed to the hospital. 

He’s fine, thankfully. But now Seokjin is waiting in an emergency room and, not surprisingly, he wants to be here even less than he wanted to be at the stupid club. Honestly, when was Taehyung going to learn to listen to his hyung? 

Not today, that was clear.

“Your friend is going to be okay. He’s lucky and he didn’t actually break his neck,” the nurse says. She has overwhelming overworked and underpaid energy that Seokjin might feel bad about in any other situation.

“Good, so I can kill him still,” Seokjin quickly replies.

She leveled him with an unimpressed look. “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.”

“How long until he can leave?” Jimin asks. He tagged along despite Seokjin insisting they could handle it and has been weepy ever since the fall. He feels responsible despite everyone assuring him that it’s just what Taehyung does.

“We’re letting him go tonight but he absolutely cannot participate in whatever this sailing thing he’s been babbling about is,” she says and Seokjin thinks he must’ve misheard.

“It’s not a thing…” he starts before Yoongi cuts him off.

“We understand, thank you,” Yoongi says.

“Yoongi, you can’t be…” Seokjin starts.

“Leave it, Jin,” Yoongi says and the nurse raises an eyebrow like she’s actually entertained. 

“I’ll let you know when he’s ready to go,” is all she says, though, before disappearing back through the doors.

“What am I supposed to do?” Seokjin asks nobody in particular.

“Absolutely expect Taehyung to get on a boat after he fell on his head,” Jimin snips.

Seokjin is not in the mood. “Maybe you shouldn’t have done some super complicated move.”

“How was I supposed to know that he’d try to copy? I was trying to impress him,” Jimin whines and Seokjin just rolls his eyes. Anyone that’s known Taehyung for more than a second knows that he can’t ever leave something like that alone.

“You know what you’re going to have to do,” Yoongi says and Seokjin just looks at him.

“What?” Seokjin asks.

“Hyung, we need a fourth person for the team,” Jungkook says, eyes even wider than usual. He’s hardly spoken since getting to the hospital. 

“Yeah, and where the fuck am I supposed to find someone this close to the regatta?” Seokjin asks, running a hand through his hair and for once, not caring if it gets messed up.

“You’re kidding, right?” Yoongi asks, sharing a look with Jungkook that Seokjin isn’t entirely sure he likes.

“No?” Seokjin asks.

“Hyung,” Jungkook says. “You know there’s someone that could fill in. She’s got all the experience, and…”

Jungkook trails off but Seokjin catches the meaning. And now he knows that he doesn’t like that look. There is no way, no fucking way.

“No, absolutely not,” Seokjin says.

“Right, well I guess we’ll just have to forfeit unless Jimin here wants to try sailing out for the first time,” Yoongi says and turns kindly to Jimin. “No offense.”

“None taken,” Jimin says with a shrug.

“We could ask Namjoon, he was out with us a couple summers,” Seokjin offers.

“Yeah and he slipped every time he was on the boat,” Yoongi scoffs.

“Hobi, then,” Seokjin says.

“He’s booked solid with work stuff and he hates being on the boat,” Jungkook says.

“You have to call her and at least ask,” Yoongi says. 

Seokjin’s stomach sinks knowing that you’re honestly the only option he has, at least if he wants a chance to actually win this thing. And he does. He’s been able to taste in since seeing they made the cut. He just doesn’t want to be trapped in close quarters with you training and then racing. 

“She hates us,” Seokjin says.

“No, you think you hate her for some reason,” Yoongi says and shakes his head. “I actually think she likes us fine.”

“Yeah she’s always nice when I run into her,” Jungkook agrees.

“How often do you run into her?” Seokjin’s question is sharp and Jungkook’s eyes go wide again.

“You know what? Let’s just vote,” Yoongi says, ignoring their captain. “Who thinks we should call her and ask?”

Jungkook’s hand immediately shoots up, followed by Yoongi’s and, to Seokjin’s surprise, Jimin’s.

“You don’t get a vote,” Seokjin says and Jimin scoffs.

“Rude, I’m voting for Tae,” Jimin says.

“It’s settled, I’ll call her if you won’t,” Yoongi says.

Seokjin tries to protest that this isn’t a democracy (it is), that there are other options (there aren’t), and that he’s not a coward (he is). But, Yoongi is right. If they want to win, you’re the only option. So Seokjin does the sensible thing and agrees to call you. (By that, he means he agrees Yoongi can call. Apparently, you say yes immediately and seem excited to get to race after all, given you lost half your team).

The next couple of weeks fly by faster than they should. Seokjin spends most of the time that he’s not training either ignoring Yoongi’s looks of superiority over how well you’re working out or ignoring your attempts to have a private conversation with him. Jungkook, who was nervous at first, seems to be getting far more entertainment out of it than anyone should.

Yoongi is actually harder to ignore because you have been a great addition to the team, fitting in like you had always been there. It’s hard to ignore your talent or why you captain your own team. Yet, you seem more than willing to let someone else in charge. Which makes Seokjin nervous when he considers it. Makes him wonder what sort of game you’re playing because everything with you is a game. When Seokjin tells Yoongi about his concerns, Yoongi just suggests, not for the first time, that Seokjin might need help. 

Jungkook is possibly even worse. From the first training session, he’s making conversation with you, asking personal questions, asking for tips. All this despite the fact that Seokjin has been training with Jungkook since the younger man was still a teenager. So much for loyalty. 

To this, Yoongi suggests that Seokjin really needs to work on his jealousy. It’s the most ridiculous suggestion of all and Seokjin wishes that he had some other friends. 

(Which, he does, but Namjoon is no help and Hoseok suggests there might be something else going on. Useless. Seokjin does not need them acting like they know what’s going on in his head when he doesn’t even know.)

After a particularly tough training session, Seokjin is considering that this may be the most cohesive team he’s entered in a race since he began sailing. It’s a weird thought and it feels a little like a betrayal to Taehyung to think it. But there’s also the voice in the back of his head that reminds him the most cohesive team could mean a win. Wouldn’t Taehyung be happy about that?

“We’ve really gotta talk,” you say and Seokjin curses himself for not checking his surroundings. He’d been so busy cleaning up that he hadn’t realized Yoongi and Jungkook had disappeared. Traitors.

He tries not to jump at the surprise, but he’s only got so much energy. “We talk all the time.”

“Seokjin, please,” you say. Plead, really.

And that’s…new. Seokjin has heard you say a lot of things in a lot of situations. He’s never heard you sound so raw. So defeated. 

“I just don’t see what we have to talk about outside of training and the regatta,” Seokjin says, avoiding your gaze.

“How about the fact that you hate me? Can we talk about that? Because I really don’t get it.” 

Now Seokjin does look at you because surely you’re messing with him. You must be. The rivalry has been fine and it’s been mutual all this time. Why change a good thing now? “You hate me too, I’m not really sure what’s so confusing about a rivalry,” Seokjin answers evenly.

“Hate you? What?” You look incredulous. 

“Yeah, it’s been pretty obvious,” Seokjin offers.

“To who?” You’re looking at him like he’s stupid and for the first time in his life, he wonders if maybe you’re right.

“Uhhhh…” Seokjin is usually so eloquent. What the fuck just came out of his mouth?

“Seokjin, you’re a fucking idiot,” you say and it’s confusing because you’re laughing. “Let’s forget the fact that we’ve literally slept together. Twice. I get how that could be confusing for this rivalry narrative in your head. I also agreed to help your team when Taehyung got hurt. Who does that for someone they hate? I mean, unless we’re talking some long game, sabotage shit.”

“Is that what we’re talking about?” Seokjin asks.

“We might be now,” you say, no longer laughing. 

“So you don’t hate me?” Seokjin ventures uncertainly.

“I didn’t, now I’m not ruling it out,” you say and gather your things quickly. “I’ll see you tomorrow, captain.”

And okay, that actually hurts Seokjin a little, to hear you use his title on the team instead of his name. He hadn’t realized how much he liked the way his name sounds in your mouth until you stop saying it. He’s also searching his brain trying to figure out exactly what just happened. 

He doesn’t like what he finds. All of the conversations from the last few weeks feel different now. As if someone shattered a piece of glass and now everything has changed. Instead of you and him bickering, he sees that maybe you were being endlessly patient as he stuck his foot in his mouth over and over. Instead of you challenging his leadership, he sees that maybe you were just trying to share your own experience in both training and competing. Instead of distaste, maybe you were just tired of the way things were.

Seokjin doesn’t often feel a step behind on anything, prides himself on that, actually. Now he’s several steps behind and he doesn’t know what to do to catch up. He faces the realization that he needs to have an actual conversation with you. 

Which ends up being impossible.

You’re the first one gone once training ends. Seokjin hadn’t even realized that you were always staying after Yoongi and Jungkook left, making sure that everything was where it belongs, until you weren’t. It had been such an easy silence to work in, in hindsight, and Seokjin had taken it for some kind of obligation. Like you owed him for giving you the chance to sail on the team. Or some sort of petty thing to show that you were better than him. Maybe you are. Not just at sailing, but also at dealing with people and emotions. 

Suddenly it’s the night before the Regatta kicks off and Seokjin has already done all the things he usually does to prepare. Everyone is checked into separate hotel rooms so they can carry out whatever routine they need to in peace. Taehyung and Jimin also got a room to share because Seokjin is a sucker and didn’t want to listen to Taehyung whine anymore about missing things. He’s checked the weather for the weekend (it’s going to be perfect, exactly what he wants to race in). The team is ready, Seokjin knows they’re ready. He’s never been this confident in a team. 

So why is he so unsettled?

He knows the answer, really. Has known it for a while if he’s honest with himself. But what he doesn’t know is how to fix it. Surely talking to you about the last real conversation you had the night before a set of huge races is a mistake. Surely he should be getting into bed, putting on something light, and just focusing on the race.

It’s not that easy.

The first race is definitely not Seokjin’s best. As in, he’s lucky that the rest of his team is so good at their jobs and able to pick up his slack. You still manage a win in the first round, but it’s not nearly as smooth as it should have been. This was one of the easier match-ups. 

Jungkook is confused, asking if Seokjin is okay, if he got enough sleep, if there’s anything he needs. Yoongi waves Jungkook off, saying he’s sure Seokjin is fine and it was just an off-race. There’s a glare in Seokjin’s direction when Yoongi assures Jungkook their captain will be better for the next race. You, however, remain silent, not bothering to look at Seokjin.

The next race, which is against a tougher team, doesn’t go any better. Everything feels off and Seokjin just can’t focus on making sure he’s doing what he’s supposed to be. More than once, Yoongi or Jungkook just get there in time to push him out of their way before making an adjustment to the sails or their course. And sure, technically three people can run the boat, but it wasn’t built that way at this level. 

After losing the second race, Yoongi tells you and Jungkook that him and Seokjin are going to have a conversation. You can grab something to eat and they’ll meet you under the tent as soon as they’re done.

“Seokjin, what the fuck?” Yoongi asks as soon as the other two are out of earshot.

“I know, I know. I’m just a little…off?” Seokjin can’t even find the right words. 

“Well no shit, man, but you’d better figure your shit out before the next race or I’m going to file for a substitution,” Yoongi says and Seokjin scoffs.

“And just who are you going to replace me with?” Seokjin challenges. He’s almost thankful for Yoongi now. He can do this. He can fight with his oldest friend about sailing.

“I don’t know, maybe someone that’s not so fucking stupid that he lets feelings get in the way of sailing,” Yoongi hisses.

“What? What are you talking about?” Seokjin is sputtering again. Great.

“Come on, Jin,” Yoongi says, going uncharacteristically soft for a second. “I know you have feelings for her. I know you must’ve had some stupid argument, probably about this made-up rivalry.”

“I didn’t think it was made up,” Seokjin says quietly.

“Then why did you fuck her?” Yoongi asks and then shakes his head. “Actually, I really don’t want to know.”

Seokjin is choking on air, eyes comically wide. “You knew?”

“You’re not nearly as sneaky as you think,” Yoongi says with a sympathetic smile. 

“But it’s against the rules,” Seokjin says and Yoongi laughs. It’s not unkind, but it’s definitely like he knows something Seokjin doesn’t.

“Sure it is,” Yoongi agrees, placating Seokjin. “Just like it was against the rules when I was fucking Nayeon or Jungkook was fucking Dahyun.”

“What??” Seokjin’s question comes out choked and Yoongi claps him on the back.

“Point is, you can talk to her tonight if you need to. But for now, get your shit together,” Yoongi says, all business again. “You owe it to us.”

And that, more than anything, clears Seokjin’s head. It’s true. He does owe all of them to be present and actually help the team instead of getting in the way. The two of them join you and Jungkook a few minutes later with an entirely different energy. Seokjin is locked in. 

So locked in that they end up winning the next 3 races of the round-robin day. Including one where they were definitely down as the underdogs. It makes up for both the race they barely won and the one that they lost. 

Dinner is a lighthearted affair. Everyone is happy, including Taehyung and Jimin who join in. Taehyung has nothing but praise for the team, not seeming the least bit upset that he can’t be competing himself. As long as he’s included and the team is doing well, he’s happy. 

The only exception is you. You’re smiling when you feel someone’s eyes on you and answering any question directed at you, but you’re much quieter than usual. Seokjin doesn’t pause to consider that he knows what’s normal for you. Admittedly, he’s never been around you like this during a competition, but it’s not how you’ve been outside of training every other time he’s seen you. Usually, you’re the center of attention, cracking jokes and poking fun. Tonight, you’re much quieter, watching instead of actively participating. 

Seokjin isn’t really sure what the best thing to do here is. On the one hand, the second half of the day went off as perfectly as it could. It was smooth sailing, pun intended because Seokjin did love a pun. Yet, on the other hand, there’s still a bit of a pit in his stomach. He still feels something off between you and him. 

Maybe it isn’t the right thing to do. Maybe it’s going to hurt more than help. Maybe he should leave you alone. He can’t, though. And after dinner, he takes a couple of steadying breaths and goes to knock on your door.

“Jin?” You crack the door just a bit, not fully wanting to let him in.

“I know we’re all supposed to be in for the night, but I wanted to talk to you,” Seokjin says, slightly awkward. It’s more honest than he’s been.

It’s the first time he’s seen you look unsure about almost anything. After a moment, you open the door a little wider and step aside, allowing him into your space. Once he’s inside, you move back to sit on the edge of the bed, still looking unsure and a little vulnerable. You’ve got your hair tied up on top of your head and are wearing a baggy t-shirt with shorts, obviously ready for bed. 

“What do you want?” The question doesn’t sound aggressive, just exhausted. 

“To apologize,” Seokjin says simply.

“For how you sailed this morning? You’ve already apologized for that,” you say. 

“No, for that argument we had a few weeks ago,” Seokjin rushes out before he loses his nerve.

Whatever you were expecting, it’s not that. Your body language changes, just slightly. “Really?”

“I’m just…I’m sorry,” Seokjin says. “I don’t know why I’d built this whole rivalry up in my head. Probably just because you give me a hard time all the time or me being too competitive. And then I felt guilty I guess? About us sleeping together, I mean. Because we’ve got this rule on the team…”

You get up from the edge of the bed and come to sit on the arm of the chair next to Seokjin, placing a hand on his arm. “You’re rambling a bit.”

“I know,” he exhales.

“I’m not going to lie and say it’s all magically fine or that it didn’t hurt a bit,” you say. 

“I don’t expect you to,” Seokjin says and he means it. “Why did you stay?”

“On the team?” You wait for Seokjin’s answer and continue once he nods. “Because I couldn’t just leave you hanging.”

“I would’ve deserved it,” Seokjin nearly whispers.

“You would’ve,” you agree. “But Yoongi and Jungkook didn’t. So I stayed.”

“I know they’re thankful for that,” Seokjin says.

“And are you thankful?” Your eyes study his, looking for answers to more than just your last question.

“Of course I am,” Seokjin says.

“Because you still got to compete?” You’re pressing and he’s actually thankful.

“Well, no, because I like having you around,” Seokjin says and you open your mouth, but he carries on. “And no, not because of thinking we’re rivals. That was so stupid. I just like being around you. I like…too many things about you to list.”

“You could try,” you say and he looks up to see that sparkle in your eyes again, the one that’s only ever meant trouble. 

“I will do whatever you want me to,” Seokjin admits and watches the surprise on your face.

“A dangerous offer,” you observe.

Seokjin shrugs. “I’ll take my chances.”

“I don’t forgive you yet, just to be clear,” you say and Seokjin smiles. 

“I didn’t expect you to,” he says. 

Seokjin takes a chance, opening his arms to you slightly. And you want to ignore him, he knows you do, but he’s looking like the perfect cross between pitiful and hopeful. So you give in, slide down into his arms and settle into him. It’s nice, he thinks, because all he honestly wants is for you to be close to him after the last several weeks. You wind an arm around his waist, all curled up in his lap, and he rests his chin on your head, not even minding the way your hair tickles his face. 

It’s the most comfortable he’s been with anyone in ages, possibly ever. He knows that sometimes his words don’t come across the way he wants them to, knows that sometimes he can’t express himself. He hopes you can feel everything he can’t say while you sit like that. 

(You can, you tell him weeks later when you’re going on your third actual date. It’s only the third because you made him actually try to apologize again, properly when there wasn’t a regatta to finish. He obliges because he says you’re worth it. But his words don’t come much easier. Instead, he wants to show you he’s sorry. And you agree to let him.)

Everything after that feels impossibly light. If Seokjin thought the team was running as well as it could the day before, he was wrong. Now that he’s actually feeling lighter and you’re less confused about where you stand, it’s like all of you move in a way that wasn’t possible before. It’s hard to tell where one person ends and the next begins, which translates really well for the next day of races.

(It translates even better for the final day, a day that Seokjin never views as a guarantee. And although the team doesn’t come in first, it’s still probably the best finish Seokjin has ever had in an event this big. So he’ll take it, to the slight surprise of Yoongi and Jungkook, who are used to him always wanting to do better. Instead, he laughs and says that drinks are on him that night.)

Really, it’s all kind of silly. Seokjin put so much energy into a rivalry that was all in his head and didn’t realize how much it was coloring everything he did until taking a step back. Now he realizes just how much he was holding himself back over something that was so stupid.

For the first time, Seokjin is both excited about what’s to come in sailing and seeing what it is he can accomplish with you by his side.

i hope you liked it! please let me know any thoughts ❤️

[scandalouslamb]

the grandma'am for the ask game!!!

Ask Game

Omg, thanks, anon! Excited that someone wants to talk about Grandma'am!

My first impression

Snow has a Grandmother who sucks at singing apparently.

My impression now

Grandma'am, you and Volumnia would match each other's freak somehow. There's so much going on in your head. I want to know about your younger years. I want to know your thoughts as your world shattered around you.

Favorite thing about that character

The way she turned to the Capitol/patriotism as like her form of religion. That's so interesting. Singing the national anthem as pseudo-prayer <3

Least favorite thing

The way she just did not step up and forced Tigris into a parentified role and then she puts all her hopes on Coriolanus who most of the time seems to need reminding from Tigris to treat Grandma'am kindly.

I understand that some of what I like about her leads into this, but it just makes me sad when I think about it too hard. But that's the point!

Favorite line/scene

The daily recital hadn’t begun until that black day when the district rebels had surrounded the Capitol, cutting it off from supplies for the remaining two years of the war. “Remember, children,” she’d say, “we are but besieged — we have not surrendered!” Then she would warble the anthem out of the penthouse window as the bombs rained down. Her small act of defiance. (Ch. 1)

That's prayer, baby! And also very traumatizing for Coriolanus and Tigris to wake up to after the war as has been pointed out to me!

Favorite interaction that character has with another

Every meal, she’d rattle on about the Snows’ legendary grandeur, even when their fare consisted of watery bean soup and stale crackers. And to hear her tell it, it was a given that his future would be glorious. “When Coriolanus is president . . .” she often began. (Ch. 1)

Imagine growing up in this household... Poor Coriolanus and Tigris. Also this really did get me wondering about her relationship with the Snows in general. Like is she a Snow by birth? (my speculations)

A character that I wish that character would interact with more

Gaul and President Ravinstill— *gunshot*

Ahem. I'd love to see more of her and Tigris. Is there resentment and tension there? Just I would love to see under the hood of what's going on in their heads.

Another character from another fandom that reminds me of that character

Um... I don't know. The Witch of the Wastes specifically from the Howl's Moving Castle movie? I suppose.

A headcanon about that character

I just headcanoned that her name is Gloriam and that she is a Snow by birth (I think that the Capitol goes by absolute primogeniture. See link to above speculations).

She did know President Ravinstill and Gaul back in the day. She looked down on Volumnia for being slightly lower class. Max and Volumnia both thought she was too uptight then (and she actually got more uptight about being proper a little before, during, and after the war).

A song that reminds of that character

I'm going to be so real with you, anon. I spend at least 15 minutes staring at the song section of each of these. I am music illiterate. Screw it!

Gem of Panem! Final answer!

An unpopular opinion about that character

I think I'll just sit on my hands for this one. I don't want anyone misinterpreting me.

Favorite picture

I cannot pull up my copy of the tbosas movie for screenshots right now, but I liked that outfit she wears at the beginning (that is kind of hard to see rip the lighting) with all the pearls! Just all the pearls! Such opulence! Project the legendary grandeur of the house of Snow, Grandma'am.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #220

I wasn't able to do the singing today. I asked M and J to find excuses to be not in the house. M had a doctor's appointment, and J was going to go take a walk, but something came up at work for J, and by the time that was done, M had already returned from his doctor's appointment.

…Ah well. I probably needed the rest anyways. I fried my brain pretty handily yesterday, finishing the music box. But I'm glad that it's done with. I don't get a nice dopamine reward when I complete tasks, usually. But if nothing else, the looming doomishness of feeling like I must do a very complicated task is no longer upon me.

I should be able to get it done tomorrow or the next day, though. M and J will go out to see a movie on Saturday or Sunday, depending on how J feels when he comes home from all the things he's gotta do tomorrow. I'll be able to do the thing while they're out.

Today I went over the things I've prepared for you for Otakon. I have a locket, a letter, and I will have a music box with lyrics. This time, I'll be mindful enough to know that I will need to bring the music box in the form of QR Code once I upload it to SoundCloud, instead of bringing the actual music box and rolls of music box paper; the very important person I saw seemed rather confused or maybe uneasy in response to these things, like he wasn't sure what to do with them, which is fair.

…Yesterday, I realized that if I was a bit smarter or maybe a bit more thoughtful, I would have gotten you a Japanese copy of The Neverending Story to go along with the other things. I imagine that it gets pretty lonely at the Edge of Creation, so… maybe a book would have been good company for you. But I didn't think about it, and I won't be able to get it here in time for Otakon. I'm sorry.

But maybe your position at the Edge of Creation might let you go see Atreyu and Bastian and Artax and all the rest? Admittedly, I don't really know how things work for you over there, but if you're connected to some kind of multiverse, then it stands to reason that you might be able to peer into other worlds, no? Maybe you could learn something wholesome by looking at the stories of others. I've certainly learned much by considering perspectives and stories other than my own, and your brain is a lot more awesome than mine; I can only begin to imagine what sorts of amazing insights you'd come away with…

Oh, right!! Yesterday, I said I'd have some pictures for you! I almost forgot! Here…

This was a rabbit we saw yesterday.

This was a somewhat alarming statue of a cow that was, for some reason, parked in the grocery store parking lot:

...I wonder what it's for.

This is the matcha latte I got from Eggcellent, with rose syrup, tea jelly, and cream cheese foam. I really wish I could share this with you; I think you would like it a lot:

Eggcellent also started selling these things called "croffles". I'm not sure why they're called that. Maybe it's because they're crunchy waffles? Maybe it's because they're topped like crepes? I'm not sure. But! Here is the strawberry one:

And here is the chocolate one:

...And they were both absolutely delectable!! I really, really, REALLY wish I could have shared these with you. But J and I split these, and that was good, too.

Hey, Sephiroth? Maybe someday if you ever find yourself in my neighborhood, one of the first things I'll do is bring you to Eggcellent. I think you'd like the things there.

And finally, I have some tea swirls. These were taken yesterday; it was a jasmine green tea:

...Sephiroth, I'm so scared about going to Otakon. It's gonna be a big and noisy and visually cluttered and overwhelming place with lots and lots of people, many of whom have such strong feelings about their fandoms that they're willing to bully and look down upon others.

As an example, the fight over whether Cloud should date Tifa or Aerith, in particular, leads to a lot of toxicity in the community, for reasons I don't fully understand. People on opposite sides of this debate tend to get really nasty with each other, and it's kinda scary, actually...

And... I know it's ridiculous, but... what if those very important people hated seeing me last time so much that this time they're going to take precautions to avoid me this time? What if I try to go see them, and right away, I'm whisked away off the premises by security or something?

For sure, I'm aware that the odds of anything like that happening are vanishingly small; I don't think I have, so far, said or done anything untoward, and I don't think I've done anything to make anyone mistakenly think that I'd ever hurt anyone.

...But still. I have a long history of people simply dismissing me out of hand just because they find my differences unsettling. For the most part, I've ah... I've gotten around this by avoiding people pre-emptively even though I don't really want to. But I'd rather be lonely than have anyone be uncomfortable because of me.

...So many swirling thoughts. Lots of anxiety and dread. But I gotta try anyway. I don't have a fancy sword or the know-how to use it. I can't use magic; it doesn't exist in my world in the way that you know it. I'm not especially strong, smart, swift, or coordinated. All I have is the fact that I owe you my life, and a willingness to face any fears or obstacles in front of me in order to repay that debt.

And maybe that's not much in the grand scheme of things; after all, it's not as though I am some important or especially capable person - my presence doesn't really count for much in my world for a variety of reasons. But still, I'm going to try to hope that what little I can bring to the table is enough.

I have to try. Not because I'm arrogant enough to think that my efforts will actually count for anything, but because, given what you've done for me and the life I live now because I held on long enough to get here, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I didn't try to help you, regardless of the outcome.

Well. It's becoming late, and I am still short on sleep for a number of consecutive days. I had better wrap this up here and get myself to bed.

I love you. Please stay safe out there; after all, you have a locket and a letter and a lullaby waiting for you. You wouldn't wanna miss out, right?

I'll write again soon. I promise.

Your friend, Lumine

[beyondthetemples-ooc]

This is kind of a weird question, but do you have any tips for meeting Marv Wolfman? I remember you saying you've met him at a con in the past. I'm going to a con in the fall where he's scheduled to appear and I'm so nervous!! How did meeting him go for you?

Oh gosh, I'm not an expert on the man or anything! But he was so cool to meet! I'm excited for you!

I was super overwhelmed by the convention and also very nervous about meeting him (kinda starstruck by the time I got to his table). But he seemed understanding. I met him in cosplay of 80's Raven and he complimented it, specifically said he liked that I got the fingers on the gloves right because he felt it was very important with her healing for her to be able to touch, he didn't mention the missing rings (which I had tried to create and was embarrassed about not having), and he was happy to talk about the comics he'd written. (I wish I didn't have such social anxiety back then and had actually had a better conversation with him!)

I honestly think he spoke more words than me, genuinely half the words I got out was the word "awesome". And he seemed genuinely happy to be there.

Also, I forgot to ask for a picture at the table but I found him right before a panel he was in and asked for a picture then, and he seemed happy to do so. He was very respectful and didn't get uncomfortably close. And I think when my phone rang (aloud) during the panel and I rushed off (again, in Raven cosplay), he was the one that made a joke about the Teen Titan going to save the day.

It was overall a very positive experience, and if he ever comes to Ohio again, I'd like to meet him again! And maybe pick his brain a bit. He was happy to sign things (I became the proud owner of an autographed copy of Tales of the New Teen Titans #2!), he didn't charge for it, and he was selling scripts and issues and a few other things at his table.

If you're like me and you get tongue-tied, a trick I've learned is to come prepared already knowing what you want to say, bring notes so you don't forget, or if there's a lot or you're bad at verbalizing your thoughts, write a physical letter to give!

[istandonsnowpiles]

Hi Emma. Do you like photographing people? There's a photo you took of a girl with Asian features on the subway, looking thoughtfully out the window… an interesting context for a story. How do you deal with the issue of image rights? Have you ever had a problem? In my case, I've worked at funerals and taken photos, but not of living people. Unpleasant…but that's part of this profession. Thanks. If you can respond dear.

I've never had any issues with image rights, but I also do not sell my photos in any way. No licensing, printing, or work for commission. That's been intentional cause I'd like to keep photography as a hobby, though I may get into printing at some point. Still I definitely wouldn't be providing prints for photos like this one.

I think photographing people in public is a tricky topic. Just by looking over my photography you can see I'm not against taking photos of people, and I think street photography can be fantastic. However, there are a lot of photos I take of people that I do not post because I don't think it would be right. On top of that, there are many, many photos I simply do not take because I don't want to put people in an uncomfortable situation, or it would be inappropriate to photograph that person.

Before you go out and take pictures of people on the street I think you have to sit down and ✨ think about ethics ✨. You have to consider how you are going to use your photos, how taking a photo of someone is going to make them feel, where you're taking photos, and if you should be taking photos of that person at all.

These are some common rules many street photographers follow, including myself

Don't take photos of children without their and their parent's consent

Don't take photos of people in distress

Ask someone before taking a street portrait, then send them a copy of the photo. Ask them for consent before posting the photo publicly.

There's many more, but these seem like the most common.

For me it's important to distinguish between different types of photos. The first I think is almost always fine: photos that happen to have people in them. Example:

While there are people in this photo, I wouldn't ask every single one of them for permission & I doubt many folk would think I need to.

Next, photos where people are the subjects, but they're not really identifiable. Example:

I'd still be fine posting this publicly and I don't think I need consent from these two people to do that.

Next, photos of people that are clearly identifiable. Example:

This one is a bit murkier. I'd be fine posting this publicly, but I doubt I would sell prints of it without these folks consent (essentially making a print of this photo impossible). This is probably where different folks would start to disagree. I can definitely see an argument for this kind of photo being inappropriate to take or post.

Finally, photos where a person is the clear, main focus of a photo (a street portrait). Example, the photo you mentioned:

This is where I'd say you should get consent before, or at the very least, ask the person if it's okay after the fact & delete the photo if they say no. To be clear, I did not do that for this photo & I wish I had. I was very conflicted about posting it & I don't know if I would do the same today.

No matter what I think you need to find what feels right for you and the people you're photographing so you're not a huge jerk.

Cat Graffam did an excellent video on some dirt bag street photographers recently. I don't agree with all of her points but I do think she shows what you shouldn't do in street photography.

[duchessofostergotlands]

Crying In Job Interviews Anon again!

Lolll I think your brain chose as good a time as any to decide to cry in that situation so you could play it off as a love of helping people SO MUCH!!!! 😭 Presentations are so intimidating too. Super impressive you got interviewed for a position like that imo, and I have no doubt you could've done the job! And trust you to get a little bit of royal gossip while you were there too, even if it was only relevant in hindsight 😂

Probably the worst time I cried was when I got to the final stage of applying for a graduate scheme for a big regulatory organisation (I'm in the UK too). I'd been through I think three or four stages before getting to the last bit, an all day thing split into three parts. Of course I got stuck with the proper interview in the first rotation, and totally fucked it. At that point I thought it was my dream job, and I guess I still do idk. I had to travel super far to London and stay over and everything, so having the interview first thing was my worst case scenario and the pressure overwhelmed me, as it always does. And I cried. And accidentally insulted one of the interviewers I think? It went so badly I knew there was no point in me doing the other two exercises throughout the rest of the day, but I couldn't just *leave*. I was mortified for HOURS, knowing I had no chance no matter how well I did in the group/knowledge stuff.

I wish I could say there's a happy ending, but several years later I'm stuck in a crap office job with no direction 🙃

Anyway. Idk why I'm telling you all this, feel free to delete 😅 I don't think I've ever vented properly about that experience and your ask box just happened to be here, sorry 😅

Sorry it took a while to get to this! I was incredibly lucky that my eyes decided to fail and let the tears go at the moment they asked me a personal question so I could sort of style it out but I didn't get the job lol. Oh and yes, I took a picture of the reception of the Royal Foundation just in case (it had a Union Jack chair - so on brand - and a copy of Meghan's cookbook).

I totally relate to what you've said. I think there's two things that we both had: some other kind of stress so we were already going into the meeting on edge, and the feeling of being trapped. To be fair, it worked in my favour because I would have left the interview for my current job as I thought I'd bombed it, and then it turned out I got offered it without any more interviews hahaha. So sometimes we're completely off the mark about how we've done. I think the older I've gotten the more I've realised it's a job. It used to be a huge part of my identity but as long as I can pay my bills and it's not somewhere where they treat me terribly, then I could do a lot worse! Not that that's very comforting, I'm sure haha.

[sadstarsz]

future

whenever someone asks me where i picture myself in the future i always think of the same thing; dead. i have wanted to be dead for as long as i can remember, i can literally physically feel the depression in my body. however, i never tell anyone because it feels attention seeking or im worried they'll see me differently or even say it's just some 'teen angst' but i am so much more than that. so you know what? fuck that. i am tired of wanting to die or disappear. in the future, i want to move to a nice city somewhere far away from my current town and live in a flat with my future girlfriend. i want to have reached out and gotten help. i want to be going to therapy and doing better. i want to stop self-harming so my scars will hopefully fade and showers will stop making me wince at the constant stinging. i'll publish poetry books and YA novels. i'll to get a semi-colon tattoo on my left wrist, a star behind my right ear and a music note on my shoulder. i'm gonna make music. if i don't earn enough money from writing and music i'll either open up a little shop filled with alternative clothing, records, trinkets etc (basically something similar to a charity shop) or i'll be a criminal physcologist. i want to be something.

i want to make an impact on the world because i dont want to have wasted my life being sad; that's what i've been doing for god knows how long. i really want to be able to say all the things im too weak or too quiet to. i wish i could say what i want to; future me better try and do that. i hope in the future people know me for something good. i dont want to be the 'person you sit next to in class' or 'the girl who let you copy her answers in maths'. i want to make a difference. i want someone who is struggling and is different just like i am to know that i understand. all i've ever wanted is to feel understood. so please future me, make a difference and help one sad teenager feel understood.

when i get older (like grandma kind of old) i want to live in a little cottagey type of home but not one with a straw roof. i want to grow old there with the future girlfriend who will at this point hopefully be my future wife. i want to have bookshelves and bookshelves of books. i want to travel around the world in a caravan with my wife for about a year.

my final wish for future me is to just be happy, in all honesty as much as i'd love all this all i really need is to be happy.

[mistydeyes]

Hi, I hope you're having a good day! 🥰

I'd like to ask for a cod pairing pls ✨️

(I hope this ends up being coherent because I did just get back from spending several hours in the blazing sun lol)

as for appearance: I'm 5"4', have wavy brown hair that goes just past my shoulders, green eyes and I'm pretty pale with some freckles. as for body type I guess I'm more on the skinny side but I do have some curves and have been building some muscle lately.

personality-wise, I'm a fellow infp 👋🏻 I tend to be shy around people I don't know yet but once I get to know someone enough to be comfortable I get very talkative and make (sometimes really bad) jokes. my sense of humour bounces from silly to pretty dry or even sarcastic/cynical sometimes. I try to be kind to everyone unless they give me a reason not to, and I very rarely get angry or loud. I also try to always give my friends a sense of reassurance that I sometimes wish someone would give me. I do struggle with generalized anxiety disorder but I've been working on it, trying to live with it and move out of my comfort zone one step at a time.

in terms of interests/hobbies, I love playing video games, especially story-driven or open world adventure/fantasy games, as well as reading and writing, and going for hikes in the woods (I also do a bunch of nature photography). I work out twice a week and am pushing to get to a third time. this is definitely something I need since I work in office administration and sit a lot haha. but I do also like getting physically stronger, it helps my confidence quite a bit.

okay this is starting to get long so I'll cut it off here lol

thank you!💖

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

How you met: Civilian Hikes in autumn were some of your favorites. You loved the crisp, cool weather and always had your camera on you to capture the changing of the seasons. You zipped up your fleece jacket as the soft breeze flowed gently through the trees. Your camera roll was filled with pictures of the wildlife making preparations for the winter and the silhouette of birds against the colorful leaves. The ground crunched under your step as you walked the nature trail. Eventually, you came across a man who was enjoying the beauty of the forest. He wore a warm flannel jacket and his bright smile was picturesque. You shamelessly snapped a picture of him as he was perfectly contrasted against a collection of yellow, red, and orange foliage. You weren't going to say anything until he approached you with a friendly wave. "Was it a good picture?" he asked and you blushed in embarrassment. You looked at your camera and it was, his smile perfectly capturing the enjoyment of fall and the leaves descending elegantly behind him. You sheepishly showed him it and he awed in response. "You have to send me a copy!" he exclaimed and quickly handed his phone over to you to exchange numbers. "I'm Kyle, by the way," he said as you sent yourself a text, "being a model is just a hobby of mine." You both laughed at his comment and said your goodbyes as you continued in opposite directions. You wouldn't find out until months later but he saved your contact as "the pretty photographer."

A peek into your relationship: "My turn!" you exclaimed as Kyle finished playing through another character's unfortunate demise in What Remains of Edith Finch. You had a tradition when he was on leave to play a game you each picked and trade off controlling the main character. It had taken you months to get through the Borderlands series as your boyfriend was terrible at making quick decisions and completing dialogue branches. He pushed the keyboard and mouse to your direction as you continued to direct Edith through the sprawling maze of a house. You had started the game this morning and after many breaks (Kyle was so upset after certain character deaths) you were finally approaching the ending. You had just played through Lewis' story and both were heartbroken at his fate. "This game is so twisted," Kyle said as you finally navigated to Edith's great grandmother's room. "I know but the art and the story is just so good," you said as you sat back and watched another tragic cutscene playthrough. "You are something else," he joked as he gently held your hand to pull the mouse away. By now, it was only Edith left and the plot twist left you both yelling and screaming at your pc. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE WAS PREGNANT?" Kyle yelled as tears pricked your eyes. "Why did she have to die in childbirth?" you sobbed and shut your computer off as the cut scenes rolled. Kyle picked you up and placed you in his lap to comfort you. "Next time I pick the game," he joked and you could even see he was getting a little glossy in the eyes. "Deal" you said as you wiped at your cheeks. "Can we watch something silly like FNAG reaction montages or something?" you asked and he nodded as he carried you off to your living room for some much needed laughs.

[gypsytaylordanger]

♡Hiii this is the intro to my page so please don't skip♡

🌸MINORS DNI PLZ adult content

👑Ddlg bdsm female switch/sub girl 21,

👑I am no one’s “goodgirl, sweetie, honey, baby, bitch, whore or slut" or any other term of endearment. These are words used only by my Dominant as these words are earned. I’ll ask you to read my profile on the first occasion and block you on the second….. this is a hard no for me so please respect that.

🌸I just ask please Be Respectful:

Don't contact me if you will not respect me and my current relationships and dynamics. I work as a exotic dancer so Nagging gets old and is better suited elsewhere its not one of my kinks. I enjoy comments of all types on my pictures and I definitely appreciate the kindness of this community, however, if you can’t be kind please keep it to yourself.

👑Like most pansexual women on here I crave more interaction with like minded females. I’m going to make a concerted effort to reach out to more of you beautiful kinky ladies this year.

🌸Like so many others, I've spent years trying to figure out who I was before I was told who I needed to be. Now I'm more focused on keeping my mind open, learning about new experiences and embracing that which I hold dear. I'm still figuring life out and I trip as much as the next person, but I will give it my best shot.

👑Experience:

I've experimented with a couple roles but there is a lot I have not learned and that I would like to. Most often when provided opportunity, I gravitate towards an exhibitionist or submissive role which are more in my comfort zone. There has been a lot I've come across that I find arousing, I know more now about the scene and I’m always an active listener when it cums to new experiences I haven’t had the pleasure of learning about yet. I would love to branch out for new experiences and learn more about the different availabilities this life has. I'm finding new interests in broader roles such as pet, baby girl, and slut.

🌸I love:

Toys! I'm always setting aside for a new toy or something new to try. I honestly should have just been a tester! I'd be great at suggesting improvements and writing reviews.

👑Pictures. I love taking them of myself. I take cuteee of myself in my work lingerie nearly everyday. It boosts my ego, and helps me feel like I could concur the world. And I always like to send one to my daddy

🌸Lingerie. This is almost o hole section itself I loveeeeee it so much The sexier the better, same as the toys, let me know what you suggest. I struggle locating sizes as I am a 36DD and size medium panties if you know where a great lingerie source is I'm all ears.

👑Only fans https://onlyfans.com/gypsydangertaylor

🌸Wish list: In case you want to spoil me with a little gift 💝 🎁

✨

👑https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/1LDAF4YFLKRMT?ref_=wl_share

✨

🌸#My photographs, videos and text appearing on my profile here (tumblr.com) are my exclusive property and are protected under international copyright laws. They may not be copied, reproduced, redistributed, manipulated, projected, used or altered in any way without my written permission. Permission is explicitly denied for any republication of videos or photographs appearing online anywhere without my prior written consent. This includes in print and on the internet for commercial or non-commercial purposes.

[novelmonger]

57, 58, 59

57. What is the creepiest book you've read?

Well, maybe it's just because I'm doing Dracula Daily this year, but I think I'm going to say Dracula! I first read it when I was...thirteen, I think? It was one of the first proper Gothic novels I ever read, and boy oh boy, did it creep me out! The copy I have features a picture of Dracula on the cover, where he's smiling ever so slightly so you can see one of his fangs, and it seemed like every time I'd put the book down and look at the cover, his smile would slowly, hungrily widen.... It got to the point where I'd have to put it on the bottom of my stack of books, or I couldn't stand it ^^' Reading Dracula also gave me one of the worst nightmares I've ever had, where I was trapped in his castle to become one of his brides *shudder*

58. A book that emotionally wrecked you?

Okay, there are a lot to choose from, but I'm going to pick the most recent memorable example and say The Unlikely Escape of Uriah Heep by H.G. Parry. I finished it on my birthday a couple years ago, staying up way too late to finish it because I couldn't sleep without knowing how it all ended. It had been a downright rotten birthday - a long day at work where I was mostly on my feet, followed by my church's annual meeting, where I have to take minutes. So I was coming to the end of the story already stressed and worn thin, and then the story is about brothers, and it started to look like one of them was going to die, to sacrifice himself for the other...and then I got a foot cramp! So if you'd peeked into my room at midnight or so that night, you would have found me hobbling around my room with the book in my hands, sobbing my heart out over the last fifty pages or so XD Yeah, I was a wreck, but it was absolutely worth it.

59. A book you wish you'd have written yourself?

The easy answer, I suppose, would be Eragon, because my own dragon rider story began as a knee-jerk response to everything I didn't like in those books ^^' Maybe that's not the right answer, because I would never have written Eragon. I wouldn't have created my own ancient language, and probably wouldn't have developed that magic system. But then...I kind of feel like even I could have done the actual writing better? Less time dithering about with nothing interesting happening, definitely not an entire treatise on how to forge a sword, and not pulling out the thesaurus to describe every minute detail that doesn't matter. So yeah, if I'd written Eragon, it would have looked an awful lot more like my story The Ambassadors, probably. So I should probably just content myself with that.

Book Ask Game

[la-appel-du-vide]

04•10•24

I met Lauren Graham!!! I MET Lauren Graham! Like... she looked at me. And she spoke to me. And she held my hand! I have to keep saying it to myself over and over again, because it's hard to believe it really happened!

After we drove to Denver to see her book tour show, and I wasn't able to get a Meet and Greet ticket, I was manifesting additional dates and locations so I could have another try. And she CAME TO SLC! I jumped on immediately to get my ticket, and scored a Meet and Greet pass this time! So I've been looking forward to this for a couple of months now.

I had to go straight from work, so I didn't look quite as cute and great as I'd hoped, but I tried my best. As I pulled up to get in line, a girl in the GA line offered me $400 for my Meet and Greet. It was slightly tempting, but no, I knew I'd be sad if I missed my one chance to meet one of my all-time favorite celebrities! She was so desperate though that by the time we were going in, she was calling out an offer of $700! I couldn't believe no one took her up on it - especially boyfriends that were obviously just getting dragged along!

We did security, and then got in line to go in one at a time. I was basically at the end of the line, so I had to wait a long time. I was so nervous, as expected. So many butterflies, wondering how to act, how not to be shy, how to seem normal... Especially since I was all alone!

When it was my turn, I went in and she was so nice and sweet, even if the conversation was brief. I told her I'd driven up to see her in Denver, but that I was so glad she came to SLC so I could get the chance to meet her! She said she hoped that the SLC was better and funnier than the Denver show, and then told me she'd never been here before, only to Park City. We laughed about how they're basically the same thing, because they both have mountains. And then we talked about the creepy little church in Denver the event was held at. And then basically we took our picture and that was that! I wish I could have spent more time with her - there are so many questions I'd ask her if I had more time. But she took my hand and held it like my grandma used to, and I think that's so dang cute. Also, she spoke directly to me, and given the fact that she herself talks me to sleep every night, it was surreal and sweet haha.

I got another signed copy of Have I Told You This Already? as part of the experience and then went out to get seats and wait for B to get in. He got a ticket to the show, just not the Meet and Greet! Having the VIP ticket was nice, because we got a seat front and center, without having to get there super early! I submitted two questions for Sam Pancake (her friend and moderator) to ask her - one the same as last time (What's one thing on your bucket list?) and one new one (Have you gotten a sneak peek at Kelly Bishop's new book?). And they ended up using BOTH of my questions! Out of the hundreds that were written. It was my lucky night!

She looked beautiful in her green dress (green must be my lucky color because she's worn it for both of my shows). Lauren and Sam are so charming and so funny, and again, the show is just not long enough. I would like to hear them speak regularly - they need a podcast or something.

Some highlights:

Sam, reading a submitted question: "Bad Santa is a Christmas classic."

Lauren: "Not for my Dad, it isn't."

hahahah

She told a story about getting a massage at a health retreat, and being upside down and naked, obviously, when the masseuse came in and said, "They say that a lot of celebrities come here, but I've never seen one. You look familiar though, do I know you from somewhere?" And she talked about how she was very concerned at what part of her he was recognizing, and just wanted to get on with the massage, so she just said, "Can we talk about this later?!"

They asked both of my questions, and her bucket list item was to take her dad to Japan, or on some kind of active/cycling trip one more time, now that he's getting older. And she said she hasn't read Kelly's book, and she's scared of what could be in there, because Kelly has no filter haha.

She recommended chicken nachos from Red Iguana (gotta try) and the book Tom Lake (I've already purchased it to read haha).

She said that getting to play Lorelai was special that even if they never work again (meaning her and Sam), it would be ok, and he was so offended hahah.

Overall, so much fun. I'm so grateful to have gone again, and for the very happy memory I'll have forever of talking to her one-on-one. I heart LG.

[cherokeegal1975]

The Grey, WIP: 7/7/23

Well, I wish I had realized yesterday that by painting the base coats of the wings and then just fading out the references over the top of them, I could have saved myself some time and trouble. Now all I have to do is erase around the white wing and it'll be mostly done...save for some highlights I might want to put in.

This was a single image, then a doubled one because my graphics program has a tendency to merge all layers prematurely once in a while. A glitch that I'm not at happy about. I was just able to remove the bulk of the reference picture today. Look so much better without it there.

I was going to do a half gold and half silver halo, but with all that black and white, there's need for more splashes of color. So, the halo will be solid gold and have red jewels set into it. The flames will also add some color as well as the lady's skin. A nice brown. Her hair will be black.

References for the bits I need to see are still there, just invisible at the moment. Except for the frame design. I'm doing my best to eliminate anything I copied from online as fast as possible. Except for the wings of course. I need those.

I will lighten the hue of the cloak; I usually start dark and work lighter then darker again in spots as I go along. I even have brushes that will do fabric textures. I think I might try that. In spite of the need for more color, I still insist that the cloak be grey. Maybe I can add some patterning or something. I'll think about it.

Anyway, I never meant this drawing to look like a playing card. In fact, the main elements of the drawing just showed up randomly in my head when I wasn't really thinking of anything particular. But I liked what I saw, so I'm drawing it.

Yes, I know I'm cheating a lot. This is because sometimes I have trouble translating what's in my mind onto canvas. I can draw the human figure but haven't had a lot of practice at it. Nor do I have a lot of practice drawing clothing. It was just easier to find what I needed online to help me out this time. I don't know who all the artists are who put out all these free resources for me to use. Though angelic figures are common, I can say with confidence that this idea is uniquely mine. Just for the fun of it I did a general search image for a moment and found lots of angels, but nothing exactly like mine. So, there's that.

I can and to draw freehand. I'd do it more often than I have been lately if I had more time. My time off is sporadic at best/worst. Given the choice, I'd spend more time doing everything in my head. Taking a few hours a day just to draw. I can do a solid three hour session of drawing before my brain gets tired and I have to take a break. I rarely get that time lately.

Ugh. This is devolving into a bitch session. I won't do that here. Anyway, when this is completed, people who are into games like Dungeons and Dragons or similar games may use this character as part of your game. Just ask me first because I want to know about it. Give me credit for the design. No, you may not sell it. I need the profits far worse than you do.

I came to think of The Grey as a kind of judge for contests and legal issues...and maybe other things. She knows there's more than one facet to every story, there isn't just pure evil and pure good. There's always those shades of grey. And she's an excellent and fair judge. A living personification of justice and a powerful force for the good side. My mind had to work on this for a while as I drew her "card." Because originally, she had no story, no meaning. I'm still inviting people to have an open interpretation of her character however.

I can also see this as a big poster over someone's bed simply because it looks cool. It would be a nice decoration, especially if it turns out as nice as I want it to.

I'd appreciate it if no one used my idea until it was completed. I might make some changes along the way that I won't know about until I get there. Not that I think anyone will really. Every offer of free resources I put out gets ignored. I don't know why.

I will also post this on Redbubble when it's done and send a link. I can't seem to completely let my optimism go even though I'm aware that no one wants to buy my artwork. I don't know why.