#knightshade

[wu-sisyphus-gang]

Jaune: We should make interracial marriage mandatory so after a couple of generations there won't be different races and no one will be racist.

Blake: What-

Jaune: Stay tuned for my idea on how to solve homophobia.

[darksaiyangoku]

Blake: I always wonder if there are other worlds beyond our own. Worlds where I'm a sorcereress, guiding people to their destiny, casting wonderous spells and making wicked potions.

Jaune: Are you high on mushrooms again?

Blake: *chews mushroom and eyes dilate* ...no.

[notmaplemable]

Look Like

Blake: *Puts a pair of fake cat ears on Jaune*

Jaune: ...What are you doing?

Blake: Just seeing what our future kids might look like.

Jaune: ...Why are you taking pictures?

Blake: To send to mom.

[dreamymaccready2287]

Jeanne comes out to RWBY, hijinks ensue. Jeanne is a trans woman

--

Jeanne: Hey everyone, thanks for meeting me... I have something I need to tell you all

Jeanne: *takes a deep breath* I'm... a girl.

RWBY: ...

Ruby: Dibs.

Yang: Dibs on what?

Ruby: Dibs on being her girlfriend!

Weiss: Now hold on! She confessed to me numerous times, how come you get Dibs!?

Ruby: And you rejected her! Also, she's my bestie, of course I get Dibs, duh!

Weiss: I thought I was your bestie!

Ruby: You were my female bestie and she was my male bestie but, now that she's a girl she's my bestie! Case closed!

Ruby: And as besties I get girlfriend priority!

Weiss: *drawing Myrtenaster* Don't make me strike you down Ruby Rose, you insolent backstabbing cur!

Blake: Well, while you two are fighting, I'm going to take my new girlfriend out on a date.

Ruby: YOU'RE ALREADY DATING YANG!

Blake: And!? She's a hot blonde I need to add her to my collection!

Ruby: And you're really just okay with your girlfriend just two timing you, Yang!?

Yang: It's not two timing if I get a piece of that future bombshell too!

Ruby: YOU'RE UNBELIEVABLE!

Weiss: Well lucky for you there isnt going to be any two timing because I'm going to be her girlfriend!

Ruby: *fully drawing Crescent Rose and snarling* THE FUCK YOU ARE

Blake: *draws Gambol Shroud* Exactly, no way she's getting with a racist hussy when she could get with a Faunus like me!

Weiss: I'M NOT RACIST YOU BITCH!

Yang: *cocking Ember Celica* THE ARCUSSY BELONGS TO US!

Ruby: THAT'S IT, NO GOING EASY ON YOU, DEAR SISTER!

*Team RWBY proceeds to get into a brawl over Jeanne*

Jeanne: ...What the fuck is happening

[spahhzy]

Blake: Dear Diary, Today, the blanket made a sudden move, and I reacted accordingly.

Blake: Full Claws, No Mercy.

Blake: The boyfriend says it was his foot.

Blake: Sure it was. The blanket has been plotting this for weeks, and I finally caught it in the act.

Jaune: Are you writing down your attack on my foot?

Blake: ...no.

[reashot]

The Battle of The Hoodie. Pollinated + Arkos.

Why do you want Jaune's hoodie?

Dragonslayer 🐲

Yang: Why? It's because I needed the hoodie to serve as my proof of conquest and to warn any potential competition for his attention.

Knightshade 🌙

Blake: Jaune's hoodie? I think you meant my hoodie. All of Jaune's property belongs to me. For I am his favorite girl. And I don't need any other reasons.

Whiteknight ❄️

Weiss: Why do I need Jaune's hoodie you say?

I needed it as a down payment for my dowry of course. The pumpkin Pete hoodie may not be that valuable but I am sure it will appreciate in value in the future as a collector item.

Lancaster 🌹

Ruby: I-it's not that I want Jaune's hoodie. It's just that I needed something with Jaune's scent to help alleviate my... Oh cookie crumble. I need it to help me relieve myself okay! Otherwise I will be unable to function in my day to day life.

Truthfully I need to achieve at least five orgasms a day or I will be so frustrated that I will just straight up pounce at Jaune to sate my carnal desire.

So while not ideal. I think having Jaune's hoodie is a perfect compromise other than the alternative of me going after Jaune's meat.

WBY: ...

Rubs...

You need help...

Bonus+ Arkos

Pyrrha: It's embarrassing, but I wanted Jaune's hoodie for my giant teddy bear collection.

All so I can hug 'em and pretend it's Jaune. I know it's silly. But I love him so much.

[howlingday]

Weiss: Once we get the security card from the guard, how do we get Blake away from him?

Jaune: Um... W-Well, we could, uh... have me pretend to be Blake's boyfriend...

Blake: Hm... You would be marrying into a very important family to the Faunus of Menagerie. What's your heritage? Are there any significant crimes I should be aware of?

Jaune: Uh, n-no, but this is just pretend-

Blake: I would also need you to change your outfit so you can withstand the tropical heat.

Jaune: Okay, I get that we're going for passing off as a real couple, but I feel like we should stay on track with the plan to-

Blake: How's your credit score? I can abide anyone with debts as my partner.

Jaune: ...Ugh...

Blake: What's your highest level of education? Are you tested? Do you use coasters with your drinks?

--------------------------------------------------

Blake: And that, children, is how I met your grandfather~.

Grandkid: So... Did you guys get the relic or not?

Jaune: ...

Blake: ...

[leorobotsworld]

Jaune: *asleep on the couch*

Blake: *makes sure no one is around*

Blake: *cuddles up next to him*

Blake: Let's see if what Ruby said is true

*a few hours later*

Blake: *slowly waking up* Hmm..

Jaune: *fully awake* Did you sleep well?

Blake: *jolts up* Jaune, this isn't what it looks like, i swear

Jaune: Blake, it's alright. You were tired and needed a nap. I understand.

Blake: *embarrassed* Oh, ok. I-I'll see you later

Jaune: Oh and Blake..

Blake: ..yes?

Jaune: I didn't know you could purr

Blake: *internally* OH GODS, KILL ME NOW!!!

[littlelewdmable]

Never 2

Yang: Never have I ever... sucked Jaune's dick while he was sleeping.

Jaune: ???

Blake: *takes a drink*

Jaune: !?!?!?!?

Blake: You get morning wood a lot and I was getting tired of getting poked in the back.

[juanarc-thethird]

Jaune's tendency to play hard to get isn't intentional. He's just a bit clueless about a woman's feelings.

Blake knows how to be blunt...usually

Jaune just returned to his room after training, somewhat still wet from the shower he took after the exercise, but fresh. Today was a busy day for him. For some reason most of her friends needed help with weights. It was strange for them to ask him for help with that, but he did it anyway. Especially with the comments they said from time to time. Ruby would tell him things like "How strong you are, if you wanted you could dominate me", sometimes Yang would ask "Do you work at Amazon?", and then Weiss would say: "How about we do some breeding exercises?" In that case he assumed she was referring to breathing exercises. And so he helped her with that. Although she looked somewhat disappointed. Whatever it was, upon reaching the room, Jaune turned on the light, and on his bed Blake is sitting with a serious expression.

Jaune: *Scared* My Oum!!! Damn it Blake you scared me. What are you doing here?

Blake: Jaune, we need to have a series talk.

Jaune: Ok? *Sits on a chair close to her* What do you want to talk about?

Blake: I need to be honest with you Jaune.

Jaune: About what?

Blake: I have been looking at you, Jaune.

Jaune: Looking?

Blake: I don't mean just looking at you in a healthy way. When I say I'm looking at you, it's not in a respectful way.

Jaune: What do you mean?

Blake: I'll cut to the chase. Jaune, I want you. Not as a friend, not as a partner. I want you as my lover.

Jaune: *Blushing* Lover?!

Blake: I want to hold your hand, hug you when I can, Kiss you when I please. My God!, I want to fuck you right now after seeing you wearing those tight gym shorts! God!, the mere thought of having you on top of me, fucking me, while I grab your delicious ass. FUCK!! It makes me go crazy!!

Jaune: *Red* Oh my God!

Blake: In short, we're both going to fuck hard right now, you understand? You are my man now. Or do you refuse?

Jaune: *Scaroused* N-No

Blake: Good boy. Now let me take off that tight shirt of yours~💕

[brunossan]

Kali knows

Kali: So i noticed you watching Blake in training.

Jaune: Yeah, she is awesome.

Kali: Maybe you should call her out.

Jaune: Maybe i would-Wait what?

*Kali gives Jaune a side-eye, him side-eyeing back but nervous*

Jaune: Uh... I will bring her back at 9.

Kali: You will give me grandkids or dont even need to come back.

[wu-sisyphus-gang]

Jaune: It might be cool to be in love.

Blake: *the normally quiet and withdrawn girl stands up at a pride rally and delivers a fiery passionate speech*

Jaune: Aw beans.

[a-southern-reader]

Weiss: Do you ever wish Jaune was like the morally gray shadow daddies in your books?

Blake: No.

Weiss: Not even once?

Blake: Not once.

Weiss: I find that hard to believe.

Blake: Look, the morally gray shadow daddy is not going to reassure me that, yes he still loves me, 97 times a day.

Weiss: How insecure are you?

Blake: Very.

Weiss: Okay, but you’ve never wished that he was like a tattooed alpha male?

Blake: Is this alpha male going to wash the dishes every night and watch videos so we can learn to properly clean our bathroom?

Weiss: There’s men who do that!?

Blake: At least one.

Weiss: Okay, that’s pretty cool. But still…

Blake: I will keep my blonde floof made for love!!!

[notmaplemable]

Jaune: Hi, I'm Jaune.

Blake: Me can has?

[brokentrafficknight]

How well did Blake do, babysitting for Adrian?

Not perfect marks but she still got the pass!

[dreamymaccready2287]

*At a after wedding party for Nora and Ren*

Sun: So, you and Jaune huh?

Blake, looking out at Jaune mingling with other guests: *nods while smiling softly* Mm.

Sun: It's kinda weird, you and him being together.

Blake, raising an eyebrow: In what way? I think the two of us make quite the cute couple.

Sun: It's just that you have practically nothing in common. You two barely even interacted at Beacon.

Sun: What did he do to catch your interest?

Blake: He was bad at flirting.

Sun: ...huh?

Blake: *rolls her eyes* I started pursuing Jaune because he was bad at flirting.

Sun: Yeah, you're gonna have to elaborate on why that made him desirable.

Blake: *sighs and frowns slightly* After Adam, I was terrified of starting another relationship. I was scared that whoever I was dating would be putting up a front to manipulate me.

Blake: I saw how Jaune flirted with Weiss at Beacon, and he was terrible at it. Bumbling and incompetent in a way that just can't be faked. He was just so clearly bad with women the last time I'd seen him, that I concluded there was virtually zero chance that he'd gotten good enough to fool me in such a short time.

Blake: So, I decided to take a chance with him because realistically he would only be able to keep up a mask for a week at most before I noticed.

Sun: And I'm guessing that chance worked out?

Blake: *smiling happily* Yeah.

Blake: He's real, and genuine, and open. He's a goofy dork whose biggest deception against me was denying that he spent weeks learning how to cook salmon just the way I like it because I mentioned it off handedly.

Blake: Also, he lets me do crazy things to him in bed, like-

Sun: Stop. I do not wanna hear whatever you were gonna say next.

Blake, shrugging: Your loss.