#kunikida is so done

[keithbutgay]

One of those fics where Kunikida finds out about everyone dating a member of a rival organization except when he asks if anyone has NOT abandoned the Agency, the Tanizaki siblings open their mouths and Kunikida just curls into a ball and sobs

[briebysabs]

Ranpo: Isn’t it time you confess your pent up feelings to that executive before you become Atsushi’s matchmaker?

Dazai: But isn’t it also time to use that detective brain of yours and piece together that Poe wants to kiss your ankles?

Kunikida: And isn’t it time to stop FALLING FOR OUR RIVALS

[etrevil]

Just had a deranged conversation in my head while studying social studies and-

Dazai: no, no- I mean. I can most definitely beat someone up in a fight. And I can hold myself up against Chuuya. Reference? Season one's dungeon scene- anyways. Yeah. I can, technically, but I let him. Cause why the hell would I defend myself against his attacks? It's hot, I'm serious Kunikida, I'm-

Kunikida: keep your fucking kinks to yourself.

[littencloud9]

“Chuuya-san? Are you feeling alright?”

“I said it’s just Chuuya, dimwit!” he snaps, gritting his teeth. He doesn’t really succeed, considering his fangs that get in the way. Chuuya turns away, huffing loudly. “You broke Agency losers couldn’t repay me anyway.”

He all but stomps off, still holding Sigma effortlessly in his arms, and Kunikida watches him go with something akin to glee in his eyes.

or, after the battle, kunikida gains himself a new work partner, his family back, a new ideal, and a sugar daddy. not in that particular order.

🍷 teen and up, kunichuu, 20.8k. featuring post-canon shenanigans, bad flirting, and a little (lots of) scheming

[lamentfulwarbler]

Losing my shit at this passage from The Untold Origins of the Detective Agency-

[benetnvsch]

wanted to draw him with his hair down

[thesunshinebard]

More evidence for Kunikida being the Funniest Character

[inamagicalhallucination]

did i already share it? well ill share it again ig

dazai after oda's death wandering around yokohama, a mess becuz someone so precious to him died, unable to understand the very human feelings he's feeling, perhaps feeling something so strongly for someone for the first time (at least whilst being aware that he is)

its night time now and he's crumpled up in some alley way not knowing what to do or how to process anything when someone calls out to him

he ignores it

they come near him

he reaches for his gun, angry at being approached by who ever the fuck-

"are you okay?" the voice asks, and dazai's so caught off guard even tho he shouldnt be - there r only two ppl after all - ppl who dont care and ppl who ask if ur okay to pretend that they do

oda was always an exception

he thinks he says fine and that should be the end of it and it is becuz the voice leaves and dazai tries to go back to breathing

except it comes back a while later with the familiar rustle of plastic bags and suddenly someone's in front of him, not touching, but close enough dazai cant ignore him, his hand tightens on his gun

"you look like you havent eaten" and in front of him, in a plastic bag, riceballs, water, and napkins

he stares

"you're well dressed" the voice says "so you probably have somewhere to go to" he doesnt "but you look hurt, covered in blood. if it was one of my students i would want someone to help them"

when dazai looks up the person in front of him doesn't look older than him

he's got long blond hair tied up, glasses, dressed in a black button up, a tan coat, and a stern look on his face

"i dont" dazai says even though he doesnt know why he's telling this strange man anything - but its true he has no where to go (chuuya's? but something stopped him before he could; ango's? that... if ango had been here... maybe oda wouldn't have-)

"dont what" dazai doesn't reply but the man seems to understand - his face falters for a second

"youngins these days, they never plan out anything. why would you spend money on expensive looking clothes and not rent out a place? my first priority was an apartment! i bought non necessary clothes after" the man scolds gesturing to his coat, dazai wants to reach for his gun again "whatever, you can stay with me for the night - i have a spare couch! this is a one time thing though! you better rent out a hotel room tomorrow!"

dazai stares at him in surprise, at his offer, his contradictory tone, voice, and words or simply the fact that someone can show such... kindness - dazai isnt sure

he doesn't remember agreeing - but he must have

must have agreed and followed the man back to his apartment, must have cleaned up the blood (odaodaoda) in his bathroom, must have eaten his food, drank his water and fallen asleep on his couch because thats where he is in the morning

its still dark out when dazai wakes up in an unfamiliar place and remembers the man

he has a feeling that the man will scold him for not immediately finding a place but let him stay for longer, but he cant stand to be here any longer

he needs to leave

go far far away from oda, the mafia, this man who showed him kindness for no reason as if oda was still here watching, making sure - he needs to go

there's only a brief hesitation when he sees the man's coat, so familiar to the one oda wears, hanging by the door, easy to grab and leave

he doesn't feel guilt when he takes it with him

he thinks of the man a few times here and there in the two years he spends wandering, waiting

he meets him again eventually, walking into the ada office with a fake backstory - he's there with the person he was told was the boss

when he looks over his eyes linger on the coat, a touch of something but not recognition

this is fine with dazai who puts on his best happy mask

"hey there! i'm here for a job interview! my name's dazai"

"Ah yes. My name is Fukuzawa, I am the president of the Agency. This is one of my employees, your future coworker if it all works out, Kunikida"

[zukkaoru]

too long since i've been a fool

“Would I not look hot with an eyebrow slit?” There’s a beat of silence, and then— Kunikida sighs deeply. “How long have you been considering this?” “Not important,” Chuuya waves the question aside. “Look me in the eye and tell me an eyebrow slit wouldn’t be hot as fuck.”

aka chuuya with an eyebrow slit propaganda

🪒 2.2k words 🪒 kunichuu, established relationship

[that-was-anticlimactic]

sits on a chair very politely. hi corey!! tell me about some of your bsd hcs ever

hiiiiiiiiiiiii

okay, so first and foremost, kenji and higuchi have tourette's syndrome (and i could go on about that but that's a whole other list lol)

jun'ichirou has a stutter and when he feels strong emotions, his eyes glitch like a neon green

kajii and ranpo hooked up once just cause

kajii is aroallo, so he was down for a one night stand and the two hold it over everyone's heads all the time like "remember that time i slept with the lemon explosions guy?"

dazai. kyouka, and akutagawa are all canonically afraid of dogs, but also like it's not like a silly hehe let's laugh fear it's like feel anxious around dogs, flinches when they hear them bark, hates their hair and has to shower every time they come in contact with one (okay the projection may be a lil strong with this one)

whenever kunikida and dazai are walking together and see a dog, kunikida makes sure he's the one closest to the dog and will wordlessly switch sides with dazai. atsushi does the same for kyouka and akutagawa, and gin + black lizard does the same for akutagawa, too

kenji struggles to process that he's experienced traumatic things, so when the adults around him try to shelter him (and kyouka, but it feels personal for awhile) from worse things, he feels like they're babying him and doesn't understand that they're trying to protect him. and then, eventually, it all blows up (prolly after the cannibalism incident) (okay... yes this is the plot of my kenji & tecchou fic but i stand by this lol)

i like to think that, no matter what universe, kenji has some kind of role in inadvertently getting kunichuu together

kenji has an eating disorder due to his ability, but he still hasn't Really processed that yet (like with his trauma) but the agency is really good about making sure he eats (but sometimes it gets hard during Tough arcs like with the hunting dogs and stuff... when kenji took food but only enough for everyone else and not himself... ough...)

kenji also (last one iuygcfghuji) has trouble sleeping at night due to his ability and bc he's so used to getting up early back at itahov. sometimes he doesn't get any sleep in a night, sometimes he can't sleep unless he eats.

when dazai and kunikida find out, dazai steals kunikida's credit card (and kunikida) and they go to the store and buy kenji a cow plushie so he has something to keep him company at night and is perfect for holding and cuddling

dazai suggests he names it kuni-san and kenji LOVES the name

dazai and kunikida get kyouka a cuddly bunny plushie after she joins, too

MARGARET MITCHELL IS A CONSPIRACY THEORIST AND HAS ADHD

lovecraft loves reality tv

the guild has mandatory weekly movie nights

nonbinary mark & lovecraft <333 and mark is Somewhere on the arospec... idk where, and neither do they, but they Are

one time mark pranked everyone by stealing their toilet paper holders and hiding them in a locker (... a student did that once. stole a toilet paper holder from the boy's bathroom, hid it in his locker, claimed he found it on the floor and put it in his locker for safe keeping)

this one is stolen from this AMAZING fic called "i can keep a secret if you hush" everyone should read it anyways kenji once walked in on tanihara making out (... heatedly... choking was involved) and they told him that it was a "fight between men" and "please don't tell anyone"

jun'ichirou is canonically afraid of earthquakes. the irl jun'ichirou's childhood home was destroyed by one. the real naomi died in an earthquake and so did the rest of his family and jun couldn't cope (he was A CHILD!!!) so light snow manifested naomi and it took him a couple years to realize she wasn't real and in this essay-

ranpo knew naomi was an illusion the Second he saw her and had a breakdown and hated her for a bit and avoided her and then told her she wasn't real once (and that lowkey traumatized him bc she broke Down) (anyways yes this is also the plot of a fic i wrote i just love this hc)

ranpo and naomi are gossip buddies and share Everything with each other. ranpo knows all and naomi was trained under dazai, so she's real close to knowing all. no silly secrets are safe.

anyways dazai taught naomi stuff, yes, but ranpo is the one who took her under his wing <333 (once he got over the illusion stuff)

yosano really likes reading, especially good mysteries, so when ranpo is busy or when poe wants a reader who won't figure it out right away, yosano is his test/beta reader <333

kenji lives with kunikida bc in wHAT WORLD would kunikida allow a fourteen year old who has never been to the city before to live on his own??? and clearly everyone else is too childish to host a child, other than jun but he already has naomi so there's two of them there, so ofc kunikida takes him in!!!

nathaniel isn't in love with maragret: she's like a younger sister to him and reminds him of his younger sisters

stealing this hc from "Poe's Baking Business: A Horror Story" but poe LOVES baking and is really good at it!!!

hirotsu owns a tractor and loves gardening <333 it's how he destresses

when people refer to "the black lizard", yes they mainly mean hirotsu, gin, and tachi, but over time, it started to include higuchi, akutagawa, and kajii <333

after the whole thing with fukuchi is over, kenji and tecchou have weekly lunches together

jouno comes along one day bc they don't "trust kenji" and now they accidentally adopted a son

kenji is willing to try tecchou's strange food combinations

bUT YOU KNOW WHO ELSE IS??? THE MAN WHO EATS LEMONS LIKE APPLES!!! PEELS AND ALL!!! KAJII!!!

anyways kajii and tecchou friendship supremacy

they also have weekly dinners where they just try the most obscure things (kajii is actually a really good cook)

jouno gets really jealous and thinks they're dating at one point lol

tachi is the resident forced babysitter at the pm, so when kyouka was there, sometimes he'd take elise to her cell and they would pass her paper and coloring utensils so they could color together

tachi still has some of her drawings

once kyouka decides she likes you, you get doodles and drawings <333

names mean a lot to tachi. he doesn't quite understand why and has lots of identity issues, but he suddenly feels more like a real person when jun'ichirou calls him "michi" for the first time

after the vampire incident, higuchi and akutagawa sit down and have a MUCH needed conversation about their relationship (not romantic lol) and it's awkward and a lil messy but oh SO worth it

ofc dazai, kunikida, tachi, and akutagawa never fully healed from their injuries from the whole... everything going on right now and all have chronic pain

elise's favorite game is tea party but with Roles. tachihara is always the sparkle solider and chuuya always ends up being the worm. never upgrades. sometimes, very rarely, akutagawa gets to be a sparkle princess

ATSUSHI HAS CHRONIC HAND PAIN BC OF THE ABUSE FROM THE ORPHANAGE so the gloves he always wears that ranpo got him? compression gloves!!! i will DIE on that hill!!!

kenji also gets compression gloves bc of his tics <333

atsushi and jun have hooked up at LEAST once. probably more.

hirotsu and yosano have chronic migraines

lucy is a t.aylor s.wift fan (s/o to grace for that one lol)

kunikida has ocd and undiagnosed adhd

poe, akutagawa, and jun'ichirou are lowkey theatre kids. also jouno.

no but jun'ichirou is an AMAZING actor, so more often than not, he's the one who gets sent on undercover missions

dazai has to frequently remind kunikida that yes, he's older than atsushi, jun, kenji, kyouka, and naomi, he's just barely an adult, too. he's still super young. cue a a kunikida breakdown. like genuinely.

[lesbiankordian]

skk au where Chuuya is the ADA's client (undercover, before the agency members find out Dazai's an ex PM member). him and Dazai have a thing going on (obviously) which irritates Kunikida.

ID in alt

Kunikida about Dazai and Sasaki, their client

they get together but it's only after Atsushi joins the ADA the rest realizes Chuuya's from the PM and he and Dazai used to be partners. you can imagine their reaction

[rosalinesurvived]

Stepped outside my bsd circle and i’m reminded why i forever stopped listening to ppl in hs whenever they told me to leave my comfort circle and push my boundaries smhh :|

[notavalidblognamebut]

Kunikida and Hirotsu complaining abt Dazai together is everything

[tricoloured-cat]

Everyday I think about this panel

LOOK AT HOW HAPPY THEY ARE

LOOK AT KUNIKIDA CHILLING ON HIS CHAIR

[littencloud9]

collapses to the floor. does anyone have kunichuu fic recs

[kunikiiida-kuuun]

My ideal was born when I realised a world where people died in front of me was not my ideal world.

.

2 years blog anniversary 💚 + 600 followers ✨