crowncar3i

[mutiny-huyutiny]

heyyyy art vs artist.

[pizzaboat]

It was/is so popular to headcanon that Amity can't stand Hunter but honestly I'm picturing Rachel and Chandler vibes

Like

Amity: You know, you should NEVER be allowed to talk to people!

Hunter, apologetic and panicked: I know! I know!

And

Amity: you're a pathetic loser, right?

Hunter: *laughs* Oh yeah

And

Amity: you are an idiot!

Hunter: I'm sure you're right, but why?!

And

Amity, dressed as bo peep:

Hunter: I'm sorry, we don't have your sheep.

And like, eating a cheese cake off the floor. I literally could see the cheese cake fiasco happening

[mister-saavik]

i can finally post the piece i made for @abstrekt for the deep space valentine zine!

some of the glittery elements got lost in the photocopy lol

[a-shade-of-blue]

Today is an especially sad day for Hamdy (@hamdigaza) because today is the birthday of his niece Zeina, who was supposed to turn one year old today. But Zeina only managed to live a short life of 5 months. She was born in the first week of this genocidal war, and killed in March along with her father and brothers. She was killed before she can even turn one year old.

Hamdy had only managed to see Zeina twice. Nobody else in Hamdy's family had been able to meet this little baby, their newest family member, before she was brutally killed. They knew her only from pictures. They did not manage to hold her, listen to her laugh, and get to know this little girl before she was ripped from their lives.

In Zeina's short live, she had only known pain and suffering. She was born in a supposedly 'safe' zone, but still was killed nonetheless. What has this little baby done to have deserved this??

Hamdy lost most of his family in the same bombing that killed Zeina. This genocidal war has killed Hamdy's mother, his aunt, his siblings, his cousins, his nephews, and his nieces. Of all his family members, only he, his father and his sister managed to survive.

I am asking you to not just read this and then forget about it. I cannot fathom the pain of losing so many family members so brutally in the same year. Hamdy is only 19 years old but he has already lost so much.

This campaign is shared by @/gaza-evacuation-funds, #263 on the vetted fundraiser list created by el-shab-hussein and nabulsi.

Only €4,052 raised of €50,000 target! No donations for more than 4 days!

Despite having this fundraiser since May, Hamdy has barely received any donations and the campaign is always stagnant. Please, give Hamdy and his remaining family members more support!

Tagging for reach. Please message me if you want off the mailing list. We thank you in advance.

@tragicallyunaesthetic  @innovatorbunny @flanneldragon @butiknowiloatheyou @ashstfu @autisticandroids @loombreaking @ruthlesslistener @the3rddenialist @drakkonyan @eligobrrrrr @strawcherrily-ish @akanetendous @nibeul @bignightengineer @khudrang @m-an-u @rdx-dcm @sleepyhomosexual @hussyknee @27moremoons @marine-bi-ology @longlivepalestina @fanonical @hello-kitty-milkshake @hyperions-fate @ana-bananya @doorhine @chilewithcarnage @daloy-politsey @witticismz @halalchampagnesocialist @spooksier @jonahmagnus @artemis-pendragon @lesbian-hannibal @turtletoria @bulkhummus @sm0kebreaks @doubleca5t @wuntrum@dlxxv-vetted-donations @ahaura@ana-bananya@northgazaupdates@c-u-c-koo-4-40k@riding-with-the-wild-hunt @roadimusprime@aces-and-angels@just-browsing1222@neptunerings@mushroomjar@northgazaupdates2@kyra45-helping-others@decolonize-solidarity @heritageposts@timetravellingkitty @briarhips @akajustmerry @wellwaterhysteria @rhubarbspring@nevert-the-guy@ethanscrocs @gumy-shark @khizuo @brutaliakhoa @decolonize-the-everything @postanagramgenerator@heydreamchild@aristotels @watermotif @stuckinapril @chanafehs@malcriada @appsa @serialunaliver @buttercuparry@bixels

[iwannakisskissyoureyesagain]

some self-indulgent monster high headcanons

draculaura was clawdeen’s sexual awakening

but since drac and clawd are in a committed relationship, clawdeen never interfered. instead, she made out with toralei at a party once, and the two of them made it official about two months later (let’s go lesbians)

howleen bought twyla noise-canceling headphones and made her fidget bracelets for her birthday

with cleo dating frankie and nefara dating clawdia, they’re both the royal family disappointments, which has strengthened their bond since they each came out (i.e. since cleo came out to nefara, who just brought clawdia home for dinner one night)

literally none of the wolf siblings are straight

draculaura would drink blood to get melanie martinez tickets the second she learns about normie music

no one speaks to gil anymore. especially not lagoona

venus and howleen have both been taken home in a cop car multiple times for public protests

toralei, meowlody, and purrsephone expand their band to include clawdeen and frankie. their music is inspired by a mix of paramore, stela cole, and chappell roan (plz i need to see toralei do a cover of “red wine supernova”)

frankie went to howleen so she could help them figure out their identity. since then, she’s become their go-to source for other important life questions, such as, “is a hot dog really a dog” or, “how do you use a microwave please i can’t burn down cleo’s kitchen”

deuce dresses like he goes to fashion school. i’m talking crop tops and low-waisted skirts or jeans, platform boots, baggy pants, and more accessories than you can count. a bi icon. clawdeen uses him as her model for her masculine-bodied designs

heath has adhd (i would say heath-twyla-neurodivergent solidarity, but she’d actually combust if she had to spend 20 minutes with him the poor girl)

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

Sword gays showdown, round 1 of bracket one

Propaganda:

For Dirk:

he literally fuckint cut off his own head so his crush would kiss him. also he made a robot that fights with a sword to terrorize said crush. also another version of him (,homestuck. complex timeline shit) keeps swords.in the fucking fridge?

Bi and gay sibling solidarity 

For Zoro:

Literally training to be the greatest swordsman in the world. Has a special three swords technique (one blade in each hand plus one with the handle held in his teeth). I haven't read the manga or watched the anime but the live action adaptation gives me extremely gay vibes and based on the fandom things I've seen I'm not the only one

bro uses three swords. has one in his mouth. dont ask how the HELL he manages that. one day he will be the worlds greatest swordsman....after he beats the current greatest for both the titles of greatest swordsman and fruitiest swordsman. he's dramatic as FUUUCK like bro what the hell. has homoerotic fights with the local twink like everyday. directionally challenged, can and will get lost in a paper bag, doesnt know left from right...he probably cant read, too. hes too silly ngl

First of all, im in like episode 250 and so far he hasnt been shown attracted to any woman at all during the whole show so far, not even when one changed clothes in the same room as him and this is anime so you know there were other characters with bloody noses and shit. With that out of the way he wields three swords at once [two in his hands, one is his goddamn mouth dude. Its cool af trust me.] When he was little he made a promise to his best friend that he'd be the best swordsman in the world. Later she died in a tragic accident and left her sword which he still uses today. He also carries a cursed sword but he overpowers the curse with a combination of skill and sheer luck. He got stuck in a chimney. While his crewmates sail their ship he takes naps. He learned how to cut through metal by fighting a guy who could turn his body into metal blades. That's metal. He refuses to fight this liberal marine officer because she looks like his childhood best friend and its just understandably really awkward for him. He's autistic. He's a he/him bisexual lesbian. He's a gay man. He's ace/aro. He's whatever you want him to be babey!!

he has 3 swords, wields one in his mouth sometimes, his dream is to be the greatest swordsman in the world

three swords and big aroace-spec gay vibes

He not only has a sword he has *three* swords. He's absolutely gay there's no way to see this man as straight. Also one time he licked his sword for no reason and that was really funny to me so I had to mention it

Look, this man thinks about three things: Swords, His Captain, and Booze. He’s on a quest to be the worlds greatest swordsman. The Live action has a scene where he declares his undying, unwavering loyalty to his captain WHILE reaffirming his promise to be the worlds greatest swordsman. At this point His dream and his Captain are so intertwined it’s crazy. Man is so sword-y he’s got three of them. When one of his swords broke he carried its empty scabbard until he was able to give it a SWORD FUNERAL. He hears a sword is cursed and takes that as a challenge. He will literally tell his swords off for “bad behavior” when they “act up” due to being straight up cursed. He tests one by throwing it in the air and sticking his arm out to see if it is so blood thirsty and ill tempered that it will cut him. Even though he’s literally the first mate if you ask him what his role is he’s going to answer Swordsman.

He's dedicated his life to two things: becoming the greatest swordsman in the world and his captain, Luffy. 

He mastered the three sword style. Its his style. It would've been more swords but he could only fit one sword in each hand and one in his mouth. He wants to be the world's greatest swordsman, a deal he made with his childhood best frenemy (before she died falling down the stairs). He thought he was All That at the start and was almost completely decimated by the actual Worlds Greatest Swordsman. Now, after two years forced training with that guy, he's probably in the top tier no-doubt, and honestly could already be the best but we just don't know for sure yet. Also, did I mention: he's got the whole demon/devil imagery going on at times. And he has absolutely no sense of direction! plus is a total softie when it comes to Chopper and all the children who somehow gravitate towards him. And he loves naps!

One of the guy's main goals in life is to be the best sword fighter and he fights with three swords which I think is telling enough of his skill.

[antipelargy]

🩷💛💙Happy Pansexual and Panromantic Visibility and Awareness Day!💙💚🧡🩷

Reminders for today:

The definition of pansexual/panromantic is sexual/romantic attraction to all genders, or attraction regardless of gender.

Pan includes attraction to transgender and nonbinary people. It is not a transphobic label. "Hearts not parts" is an outdated definition and doesn't reflect the pan community.

You can be pan and asexual and/or aromantic. You can be panromantic asexual, aromantic pansexual, panromantic arospec, and/or pansexual acespec.

You can be a pan lesbian and/or pan gay.

You can be pan and any other labels you want! You can be pan and have 10 other labels to describe your attraction! They're your labels, you choose what they are. If it makes you happy, go for it!

Pan folks and bi folks are siblings, not enemies! The labels overlap! This includes all other mespec labels too! Stop the panphobic, biphobic, and mspecphobic discourse! We must stand together in solidarity!!!

Whatever flavor of pan you are, you are valid!!! You deserve to be happy, safe, and have a welcoming community.

[symphonic-scream]

Fucking gotta talk about this shit I've accidentally made something somewhat wholesome

So. The focus this time? Hifumi. GASP. and? Transfem Hifumi. Yeah.

So she's new to being herself. Conservative family, sheltered, one night she ducks into some random bar to get away from the crowds and- oh. Its Crossroads. A gay bar. There she meets Joker for the first time, a blooming Drag Queen, and they become good friends. Joker is there as Hifumi discovers shes trans and helps her set things in place to get away from her family

You see, Joker has lots of queer friends. Working at a gay bar does that to a guy. Unfortunately he and his boyfriend Goro don't have room in their apartment with his little sibling staying with them, so he resorts to plan B. Asking Haru and Makoto to help a woman out

So basically. Hifumi learns how to live as herself freely for the first time, with the help of some new queer friends while living in Makoto and Haru's guest room and having weekly tea with Akira

Here's where everyone's at!

Joker (Akira)- he's a drag queen of course. Moonlights as Aki-chan at Crossroads, is dating Goro, shares a small apartment with him and Futaba. Friend to many a queer folk, he jokes that he's the slutty glue that keeps their ragtag group together

Ryuji- studying to be a gym teacher, a proper one. Bisexual, cis. Openly bi too, he has his flag pinned to everything he owns. He even dyed his hair in the flag colours once when he had too much to drink. Shares Ann's place with her, Shiho, and Yusuke, he's blossoming out now that he's out of highschool

Ann- beginner actor, bisexual and cis, been dating Shiho since their highschool days. When Ryuji woke up with his hair dyed, she dyed her pigtails out of solidarity. She really hopes Hifumi branches out into trying different fashion and makeup options, she's looking forward to a good girl's night with someone other than Haru

Yusuke- gay asexual. Transmasc, he/they. A starving artist rescued by two overly friendly bisexuals (and Shiho), his room in their place is a den of colour and expression and their soul splattered on the walls. He ends up closest with Hifumi out of the roommate quad

Futaba- they like girls but doesn't wanna pin down their sexuality just yet. Agender, fine with the label non-binary too, any pronouns. Works as a freelance cyber security assistant out of Akira and Goro's apartment, doesn't like being around people too much. They like Hifumi. She's quiet, smart. She's also unafraid to join Futaba in bullying Goro

Makoto- lesbian transfem. To put her identity into the classic lesbian terms, she's between futch and butch, and is working to be a youth councilor. She transitioned rather young and has reached a solid point in her life, and is very excited to get to guide Hifumi on her journey of defining Womanhood for herself. She and Haru are married in every sense but the legal one

Haru- cis lesbian. Though, honestly, shes mainly only ever had eyes for Makoto. High femme. She runs a little cozy bakery slash coffee shop under their apartment, the whole place screams cottage core. She's excited to have another person to dote on around the house. Secret from the others, but her and Makoto are beginning talks of whether they'd want to have a kid

...

Yeah I. Y'all,,, holy shit

[ketoopsart]

THEYRE THE SIBLINGS EVER

they’re so bi 🤝 lesbian solidarity

[goddess-of-frot]

Friendly Reminder that this blog supports Bi Lesbians

As a trans person, I can understand that there are complex ways of embodying and approaching many labels, including and especially the label Lesbian which has occupied many definitions both politically and socially throughout its use.

I keep seeing other lesbian blogs react with outright hostility based on some notion that they "disrespect our boundaries" because they set their own boundaries with a label that overlaps with ours. That's not the case, and a sign you are insecure in your own boundaries, which is your own problem. Making that the problem of our siblings who are expressing a similarity in experience and struggle is a failure to have solidarity with your fellow lesbians, and means you should take significant time to figure out your own issues.

[beezonia]

Okay so here are some relationships from the twstd x eah x mh au I have and why I want to explore them!

————

Malleus and Rochelle

These two would be best friends I like to think. Mal would totally ask her questions about what it’s like being a gargoyle and what the others are like.

Rochelle would tell him about Scaris and her adventures there!

They’d be really fun to write about!

—

Trey and Ginger

I’ve said this before but these two would be best fucking friends for sure.

They bake together, share recipes from their homelands.

They just both vibe well with each other!

Also both of them are badass in their own ways!!

—

Riddle and Lizzie

Okay these two would love each other, like both of them follow the queens rules to a t and they are both somewhat extremely awkward with socialising!

They’d become good friends for sure!

—

Vil and Cleo

Frenemies for sure

They share makeup tips but have a friendly rivalry, but you can catch them gossiping almost every other day.

—

Azul and Lagoona

This would be fun because we have extremely chill lagoona with like worry wart/composed Azul

I feel like with a bit of work they’d become good friends!

—

Kalim and Briar

Best friends I don’t make the rules, they would throw banger parties together for sure.

But obviously they stress jamil the fuck out and probably give him grey hairs too early.

——

Frankie and MC

This would just be the two protagonists becoming even stronger together!

Also grimm would be so interested in frankie’s detachable limbs I like to think!

——

Lilia and Faybelle

Another one Lilia adopts, he sees good in faybelle and wants to bring it to light!

She admires Lilia definitely and really does try to make him proud.

—

Leona and Clawdeen

Oh yeah this is definitely a Bi/Lesbian solidarity situation for sure

They bicker like siblings for sure but are always looking out for each other!

Leona respects Clawdeen and her skills and admires her ability to create some awesome designs!

—

Sebek and Abby

This would be a hilarious pair, blunt Abby with screaming sebek would just cause absolute chaos in the Diasomnia dorms for sure

They have a good friendship though but it does take them a long time to hone it!

[mspec-culture-is]

i had an exclusionist partner who was against pansexuality and because of that i felt pressured into identifying as bisexual. after that relationship ended i ran away from the bisexual label, calling myself anything but bi, but now that it's been over a year? i love my bisexuality just as much as i love my pansexuality and lesbianism. i love being both bisexual and pansexual. i love how whole it makes me feel. i love the solidarity between the two communities and the very large, colorful, bright overlap right in the middle. i love how diverse and accepting it is. i love my bisexuality and pansexuality, and i love my bi, pan, omni, poly and multi siblings.

I’m glad you got here

[kakusu-shipping]

Can you do Fatgum, kirishima, or Tamaki?

This is like Half the Fatfam so I'll do you one better and do the whole Fatfam because I love them and leaving any of them out feels weird kfdjgkfdg

Ask from Here

Taishiro Toyomitsu

Sexuality Headcanon: Pansexual

Gender Headcanon: I see Taishiro as a Cis man, but I've seen very cool Trans Taishiro takes as well, so I'm between the two usually. He/Him

A ship I have with said character: Me?? Me self ship with Taishiro my beloved?? Oh but also Kendo Rappa I love that guy. He's Taishi's creepy gross stalker and I think they're funny together

A BROTP I have with said character: His interactions with Monika in Vigilantes will never not be hilarious to me. She's so not funny and he's so mean and they're hysterical together and I love them

A random headcanon: Taishiro's entire wardrobe is hoodies. He sleeps in a hoodie, his casual wear his hoodies, he's got a nice date hoodie. It's his comfort outfit and he refuses to change.

General Opinion over said character: I love this man. He is my husband, I mwah mwah mwah him face. Top tier fat rep, Horikoshi's best character by a mile.

everyone else under the cut so the post doesn't get too long

Tamaki Amajiki

Sexuality: Gay

Gender: Like Taishiro I see him as Cis usually but I've seen sooo many good Transgender headcanons as well that I'm kind of in the middle about it. He/She

OTP: MiriTama is SO cute!!! Top tier!!! My Hero really has the best Blond/Dark Hair ships out there.

BROTP: I really like his relationship with Neijire, being in the same class I feel like she just kinda bugged him until they were friends. Lesbian/Gay Hostility. They bicker like siblings.

Random Headcanon: It's Tamaki's fault we keep getting interns at the Fatgum agency. He hears someone struggling and thinks "Fat could help them" and brings them home like a kid bringing home a kitten. He's a bleeding heart, just like his father.

Overall Opinion: I LOVE Tamaki like a LOT. My favorite part about him, and all the 3rd year students we meet, is he's already gone through his entire character arc. He, Mirio, and Neijire worked to overcome challenges, faced problems, had training arcs and everything long before we met them. They're main characters post their own plot and I LOVE that kind of story telling.

Eijiro Kirishima

Sexuality: ALSO Gay

Gender: Transgender, He/Him

OTP: KiriBaku my BELOVED, my boyfriend Zayne was really into this one when he was into My Hero so I kinda got pulled into it first. I do really like them. Hot Headed VS Bull Headed.

BROTP: Mina for sure!! Gay/Bi Solidarity. She was his gay awakening in that he thought he liked her Romantically until he realized he didn't like girls at all. They have self care sleepovers where they do facials and paint eachother nails and gossip for sure

Random Headcanon: Kirishima has a real soft spot for Shojo Manga, and prefers it over action packed Shounen. The only people who know this are the rest of the Fatfam, Mina, and Bakugo.

Overall Opinion: I'm gonna keep saying I love these characters and it's true I loooove Eijiro sooo much. He's so head strong but with a huge heart he cares and worries SO much and he's also always down to clown commit to the bit ride or die kinda guy. I love him.

Tetsutestu Tetsutetsu

Sexuality: Bi? Pan? Omni?? Poly??? I don't think he really knows the exact label fits him best. Everyone in class B would say he's Bisexual, but he himself would answer the question with a "I dunno, boys are cute, girls are cute, what's it matter?"

Gender: ALSO Transgender, He/Him

OTP: I really like him with Kendo, their dynamic is incredibly cute and funny. A lot of "That's MY WIFE!!!!! :D" Energy and I love that for him. He's her biggest cheerleader.

BROTP: He and Eiji as constantly butting head twins who are too similar for their own good is incredibly funny to me and I do love that dynamic. I also love him with Neito Monoma as the bite to his bark kind of dynamic. He doesn't do it on purpose, he just loves hyping people up and isn't really hearing the nonsense Monoma is saying.

Random Headcanon: Tetsu really needs glasses, like really needs glasses, and just doesn't know it. He thinks everybody sees like this and just hasn't questioned it.

General Opinion: My Hero Academia Dumb Guy is a very particular gender and I adore it. Well, I call Tetsu dumb but he can't be that dumb to be in UA, it's a top school after all. He's just impulsive and hard headed and reckless, not necessarily stupid. I love him, boy son son boy

Momo Yaoyorozu

Sexuality: I'm in camp AroAce Momo, but I can also be on team Ace/Lesbian Momo. Back and forth on that one a lot.

Gender: Cis gender, She/Her

OTP: Sense I think she's Aro I don't have a lot of Momo ships off the top of my head, but I think she and Jiro are cute. The ideal Big Fem Little Butch Lesbian/Bi ship. If anything Jiro for sure has a crush on her.

BROTP: I really like the headcanon that she, Iida, and Todoroki are all childhood friends who attended a lot of the same Pro Hero/High class parties and hung out together during them.

Random Headcanon: Momo's parents don't support her choice to do Hero work, and are constantly threatening to pull her out of UA if the hero training gets in the way of her grades. She has an uncle who's a Pro Hero, which is how she got the recommendation to UA in the first place, he's also the one who signed all her paperwork and showed up for Parent's Day.

Overall Opinion: Momo is what made me realize I shouldn't focus too hard on the costuming of My Hero Academia fjkghjdfg her hero suit makes me sad. I think she's a very under used character, and could use some character development time under Fatgum, sense they both have quirks that utilize fat cells and she is entirely too thin to be doing hard hero work while using up that much energy. No WONDER she passes out all the time!

Nirengeki Shoda

Sexuality: Biromantic, Asexual

Gender: Trans Man, He/Him

OTP: It's hard to ship the 1-B kids cause they don't get near enough focused screen time. Shoda doesn't even seem to have a real affinity with anyone in his class either, sense every time we've seen him he's paired with someone new. I got nothing, it seems.

BROTP: He, Yui, Reiko, and Kendo all hang out I think. Shoda's really chill and team focused, so he can really blend into any group, but the girls specifically tend to steal him for hang outs the most.

Random Headcanon: Shoda has a real hard time taking praise or thinking he's really worthy of anything, a lot like Momo. It's something he's been forced to get better at sense being in a class with Neito Monoma though, sense the guy won't take "nah I didn't do anything" as an answer when complimenting people. Shoda's worked self deprecation out of his speaking habits out of necessity at this point.

General Opinion: My son boy I picked this one for the Fatfam and I'm the only one to do so but the Baseball OVA really got me okay my S/I is baseball themed and Shoda's quirk is REALLY GOOD for baseball of COURSE I'd pick him up. My intern now, suck it Shishido. I also just think the Fatgum agency needs more Class B in the mix. MORE REP FOR CLASS B!!!!

[theruinedpropechycomic]

Guess who has all their art files >:3 I Can Post DESIGNS!! which means....Bulk design upload!!! Starting wth Watchers, Nurses and Trainees

Name: Song

Pronouns/Gender: He/They DemiBoy

Sexuality: Gay

Personality: Funny little guy, besties with Yawn. WlW & MlM solidarity. Big brain and will watch you.

Job: Watcher 👀

Name: Asteroid

Pronouns/Gender: They/Ze/It Agender

Sexuality: Aromantic, Panplatonic

Personality: woagh autistic creature. Literally me btw and QPR with Pale and co-parenting with her. Super chill and caring with everyone. Knows everyone somehow.

Role: Nurse

Name: Thunder

Pronouns/Gender: He/Him Cis

Sexuality: Straight(?)

Personality: one of those chad 12 her olds that moan during class for no reason. Annoying and loud as hell!!!! Make him shut up pls!! Shine is so tired of their brother...atleast he's not homophobic.maybe

Role: Trainee

Name: Shine

Pronouns/Gender: They/It Nonbinary

Sexuality: Lesbian

Personality: Quiet, complete opposite of its brother. Very quiet and will rock his shit when hes becoming to much lmao. Loves their brother though

Role: Trainee

Name: Wren

Pronouns/Gender: They/She Demigirl

Sexuality: Bi

Personality: rebel girl!! Teenage dirt bag but also a cutie patootie, sweetie pie. BFFs with Ash and Nettle, minor bby crush on Nettle.

Role: Trainee

Name: Nettle

Pronouns/Gender: They/Them Nonbinary

Sexuality: Lesbian

Personality: Literally just Pinkie Pie from MLP. Super excitable and when their sad it's super obvious. Rarely gets angry or upset. ADHD to hell

Role: Trainee

Name: Ash

Pronouns/Gender: He/She, Trans Tom

Sexuality: Gay

Personality: Chill, think Maud pinkie pies sister, ironic sine Nettle and him are siblings. Also autistic. Likes to play with the kits and the elders.

Role: Trainee

(if the format is different no it's not ur crazy)

[redheadbigshoes]

omg, bi people disregarding comphet tho… completely ignores the subsection of bi women who have had to UNPACK THEIR OWN COMPHET? and recognize their real attraction through the fog of their conditioned, false, comphet attraction??? who talk about their comphet experiences & the way bi women might experience comphet?? its weird to me. idk people dont seem to grasp that while comphet is EXTREMELY visible and most common struggle in lesbians, other queer folk are not utterly immune to its effect simply bc they are not lesbians because compulsory heterosexuality is a whole ass conditioning. re: the aro/ace, bi women, who have suffered with comphet, as well as even the rarer gay men who have experienced comphet for women

side note. that anon who said they were ashamed to be bi bc of some bis homophobia made me really sad :( bisexuality is a beautiful thing, there will likely always be homophobic bis and biphobic lesbians/gays & its important those of us who arent to actively lift each other up, fight those fools together, and each take joy in our own sexualities as well as finding joy in the queer joy of others

im holding my bi siblings hands in lesbian & bi solidarity

Exactly… they don’t even understand that lesbians are not the only ones who are affected by comphet, even though only lesbians struggle with false attraction to men.

And yes, I totally agree with you. It’s important to recognize when someone of our own identity is doing something wrong and invalidating another identity. Just like I said in the other ask, bisexuals who see other bis invalidating lesbians need to call them out because they’ll more likely listen to other bisexuals than listen to lesbians, and when it comes to biphobia coming from gays and lesbians it’s also important that other gays and lesbians call them out because, again, it’s more likely a gay/lesbian will listen to another gay/lesbian than to someone of another identity.

[hellomynameisbisexual]

When Charmee Taylor, an LA-based actor, came out as bisexual two years ago, she hoped it would be a climactic moment. “A band is going to play, people are going to be like ‘Go Charmee, you’re out!’” she says. But the euphoria was tempered by a sinking realization: As a Black bi woman, Taylor would be coming out, in one way or another, for the rest of her life. That’s partly due to bisexual erasure, the tendency of both straight and queer communities to overlook, ignore, and perpetuate negative stereotypes about people who are attracted to more than one gender. Bisexual erasure intertwines with racism, ableism, transphobia, and other forms of marginalization to harm bi folks in all our intersecting identities. Like the bi folks I spoke to for this piece, I define “bisexual” as meaning attraction to more than one gender, which can include people across the gender spectrum. Bisexual people can be cis, trans, or agender; we can identify as fluid or find that our attractions are more fixed; and we can be attracted to different genders, at different times, to different degrees. “Bisexual” and “pansexual” are different labels for people attracted to multiple genders, and there are many reasons folks prefer one or the other, but we share similar concerns and solidarity. Bisexuals are the largest subgroup of LGBTQ-identified people. Yet most of us have, at one point or another, had to contend with the myth that we don’t exist. Bi erasure is rooted in the misunderstanding of gender and sexuality as a binary, in which we must be either men or women, gay or straight. Partly as a result of bi erasure, bisexual folks are less likely than our gay and lesbian siblings to come out; we have limited data and funding dedicated to our health; and we experience increased rates of poverty and violence. While bi erasure is harmful and persistent, Deana Williams, a sexual health doctoral candidate and researcher at Indiana University, reminds us that it’s not the whole story. Bi folks have long pushed back against a world that overlooks us, turning our sexuality into a source of solidarity. “We can use identity for resilience,” she says.

Bi Erasure Is Constant

Most bi folks have a story of coming out and feeling invalidated. This can take the form of being told “you’re just asking for attention,” says Marissa Tolero, a bi-identified psychotherapist and yoga instructor who works with women and queer clients. When Taylor came out to some loved ones, meanwhile, she was asked whether she was bi as a result of childhood trauma, and whether bisexual men really exist. (“That’s like being like, ‘Is the sky real?’ Yes, it’s real,” she says.)

Discrimination of bisexual people is ultimately harmful to all queer people.

Many bi people face the assumption that our sexualities are temporary. “People assume bisexual women are just experimenting, and they’ll ultimately realize that they’re straight. And bisexual men are on the triain to being gay,” says Nic Johnson, a Lehigh University professor who researches bi women’s experiences of sexual violence. Of course, bi folks’ attractions can be fluid, and our labels can change—but that’s not proof that our sexualities aren’t “real.” Similarly, bi folks are often judged according to the gender of their current partner, rather than their self-identified orientation. “A lot of people assume that once you’re married, you’ve ‘picked a side’,” says Cora Eckert, a bi, nonbinary woman theater professional who moderates a Facebook group for bi people with long-term partners. (They use all pronouns, but opted for they/them pronouns for this piece.) “I’ve had to tell them that even though I’m married to my wife, that doesn’t make me a lesbian,” they say. Tolero experiences the opposite pressure: Because she’s in a relationship with a cisgender, heterosexual man, others often assume that she’s straight. Queer people perpetuate anti-bi stigma, too. Tolero has been told by queer friends that, because of her relationship, she’s “chosen men” and is less queer. As a result of similar kinds of invalidation, Johnson says, “I feel more accepted in queer spaces if I don’t say that I’m bi.” This discrimination is ultimately harmful to all queer people. It increases our collective anxiety around identity, and decreases our ability to build community. The result, says Tolero, is a “divide and conquer” dynamic that ultimately benefits cis men. “Those who are oppressed are encouraged to divide and turn towards each other,” says Tolero. “It’s a tactic of oppressing queer people in general.”

Bi Erasure Hurts Our Health

Bi erasure enables harmful stereotypes and prevents accurate, empowering research on the bi community. Bisexual people experience higher rates of poverty than lesbian and gay people, at 30 percent. We’re also more likely to experience interpersonal violence: 61 percent of bisexual women, and 37 percent of bisexual men, have experienced sexual or intimate partner violence, as compared to 44 percent of lesbians and 26 percent of gay men. There isn’t good data on how biphobia specifically effects trans and nonbinary people, but in general, 31 percent of trans people live in poverty, and 66 percent have experienced sexual violence—a much higher rate than their cisgender counterparts.

“You don’t have to change yourself to please anyone. Embrace all of yourself.”

Mainstream culture hypersexualizes bi people, especially bi women and femmes, so our coming out may also be treated as a sexual invitation. That, says Johnson, can lead to others victimizing us. Eckert has felt this hypersexualization in their daily life. “For some reason when you say bisexual, people really emphasize the word sexual in it,” they say. Meanwhile, bi people of color are forced to navigate structural racism in addition to biphobia. For Taylor, this leads to a constant sense of in-betweenness. “I feel like I’m not accepted by the straight people back home,” says Taylor. But when she moved to a majority-white, gay Los Angeles neighborhood, “I felt that I couldn’t be Black.” These intersecting oppressions contribute to bi folks’ higher rates of anxiety, depression, and substance abuse.

Bi and Proud

“This is something I’m deeply struggling with as we speak—wanting to have someone be like, ‘Yes you’re queer,’” Taylor says. But true validation, she’s learned, can only come from within. “The only person that’s gonna bring you wholeness is yourself.” Wiliams, whose research focuses on the aging experiences of bisexual, bi- or multiracial people, has learned similar lessons from the elders she works with. “They reject being in a box and they love that,” Williams says. “That transcendence is something that is seen as a strength.” When Williams asks them for advice for younger bisexual, bi- or multiracial people, the lesson is often simple: “You don’t have to change yourself to please anyone. Embrace all of yourself.” This self-embrace is a daily practice, like a muscle we can build. We all have an inner voice that knows our truth, beyond the expectations of partners, family, or even LGBTQ community. Practice embracing this inner voice with compassionate understanding, says Tolero. Check in on your inner monologue: Are you making judgmental or invalidating comments toward yourself? See if you can reframe them into more affirming ones, giving yourself the same grace as you would a beloved friend. Seek out media that represents bi people in affirming ways; seeing positive reflections of ourselves can help change that internal script. You can also build healthier boundaries to protect your time and energy from people who invalidate you. Recently, Taylor says, she’s practiced opting out of conversations that deplete her emotional energy, especially when others ask her to educate them about her identities. “I have to take care of me first,” she says. “If you’re not there yet, I can’t bring you.” Many of the elders Williams works with feel that their identities as bisexual and bi- or multi-racial help them cultivate more empathic connections with other marginalized people. This kind of social support is one of the most important ways we can validate ourselves. Seek out bi-affirming community spaces. Try reaching out to your local LGBTQ community center or use the Bisexual Resource Center to find a bi-affirming group near you.

Building a Bi Utopia

Bi folks are taught that our orientation should be kept hidden. But in reality, our sexualities can be a source of joy and strength. I asked my interviewees what a bi utopia would look like for them. Eckert imagines a world in which “every human being has the right to explore who they are as a person.” Johnson wants a world where “your sexuality, whatever it looks like, could be seen as beautiful.” Taylor imagined a world of radical equality, in which the most marginalized are centered. We’ll reach a bi utopia, she says, “Once we get the people who are at the very back of the line to the front.” Enormous inequalities come between us and that world. But I believe that we each already carry a little piece of bi utopia inside us, in the form of our radical capacity to love. Taylor agrees. Even after reflecting on the pain of bi erasure, her voice fills with joy. “I feel overwhelmed with how happy I am to be bi. It’s such a gift,” she says. “In my opinion—I’m very biased, pun intended—I just think it’s a magical thing.”