#like idk what you were expecting man you told him you made your first bf immortal because you didn't want him to die

[orcboxer]

Olrox: I'm not in love with you, Mizrak.

Mizrak: [chooses his ideals over staying with Olrox]

Olrox:

[short-black-diamond]

please can you do bf headcanons for kaiser and sae and rin please (fem reader)

thxx

yeheeheheyyy

German vocab: "Schätzchen" = cute-ification of "treasure"

---

"That's my boyfriend!"

Kaiser:

Ayo how I hate that bitch

Please don't request stuff about him in the future

But him as a boyfriend?

I guess he'd be pretty chill, but he'd like to have you on his lap a lot

like, in that one chapter where he examined Isagi, he'd for sure have you on his lap, while trying to figure out what made Isagi so different

and he'd just--- stroke your thigh?

Idk I think he would do something like that

anf then hmmm...I think he's rich

not filthy rich like Reo, but pretty rich

I think he'd also spoil you? like--he'd sometimes buy you jewellery, but other than that, he would buy you other stuff, which is much more useful

like, one time he bought you a new tablet because yours got coffee on it

his coffee

soccer dates don't @ me

he'd try to teach you soccer if you didn't already know how, and if you did, he'd have you running after him as he always took the ball away right under your heel

It was funny, and you were happy to see your boyfriend laughing and giggling when he teicked you over and over again by dribbling the ball around you, before he gave you a small kiss to your cheek and scored a goal

"Jeez, you need to do better if you want the ball, Schätzchen."

You huffed. "I hope this wasn't an insult.."

"I'd never insult you, ____."

You guys would also go through Germany, with him showing you a lot of sights and taking pictures of you, then some selfies and would also buy you a cute souvenir.

he's a gentle lover, who gives you soft kisses and holds your hand softly

I think he'd also bring you to a viennesse ball, just to dance viennesse waltzer with you with an expensive, victorian dress he bought you as you two danced the waltz in old fashioned clothing in an old fashioned building with old fasioned people

bonus points if it was a masquerade ball

(imagine if he told you he'd meet you at the ball and mistake another girl with you, thinking that it was you, and you arriving to him dancing with another girl who had similar features as you...just imagine the heartbreak...the drama...I'd dance with Ness then, just to spite Kaiser...maybe I'll write a fic about that?)

Sae:

If you read my last post, I guessed -correctly- that Sae's an ass guy

Excpect your butt to be warm and squeezed at all times, babe

No but seriously I'm so proud of myself for being right about something I didn't know was already canon

*pats my own shoulder proudly*

He's busy

He has to train

but if you want to come with him, he won't stop you

When he was with the U-20, and he agreed for you to come with him, he hated it the moment you stepped foot in the room where he and his team was in

Imgine the bloodlust he felt when Oliver and Sendo touched you and flirted with you like there was no tomorrow (they didn't know that you were together with sae)

"I'm Sae's girlfriend..?", you then said and Sae hugged you from behind.

"Yes, I am her boyfriend, so take your filthy hands off of her.", he seethed.

Safe to say, the two didn't really listen as they just kept flirting with you, and they got to feel Sae's wrath on the field as he just kicked the ball into their face and crotch area

Other than that, I'd expect him to be very clingy

he looks touch-starved

give this man some love

After practise, he would always take a quick shower before cuddling with you on his bed and just take a small nap, letting you do whatever you want, but don't move your legs

he once turned you around on your stomach with force before he just---let his face fall onto your ass cheeks

you have no idea why he has an obession with your butt but oh well

Rin:

Another touch-starved baby

But he enjoys your company, speak, the first weeks of you dating him were silent, but he always had a small smile on his face

but let me tell you- he blushed madly when you held his pinky with yours

it was actually the first time you touched him

boy couldn't breathe

what have you done ____???

However, as the days went on, Rin initiated the touch more and more, and after a few months came the first kiss, with him kissing you softly, but his lip was trembling

And a rin with a beet red face came to view

I think he'd talk very quietly to you, I don't know why, but I just--do, you know?

Like he only wants you to hear what he has to say to you.

and you love it

also expect him to buy you stuff you don't really need?

I mean, he means it in a good way, but do you actually need an owl plushie in all its natural colors?

"Rin...why?"

"I-I like owls...! ...and, you're my girlfriend...so I wanted to give you something I like.", cue him looking at you sadly, but with innocent eyes.

yeah, you kissed him breathless after that little confession

also like-- I don't think any of the blue lockers have a dominant bone when they have an s/o at first, which means that the boys would also be shy

and I can just imagine Rin taking many tries before he actually asks to hold your hand, or takes nearly an hour more time from his busy schedule to buy you flowers you weren't allergic to, but which you also haven't received yet

he's the type who'd try to bake you cookies, and only have a small error, like either not enough sugar or cocoa, or idk what

---

Okay and that's it! I hope I nailed it, tell me if I didn't!

Read you guys in the next post!

[1kook]

distractions

jeon jungkook x (f) reader

summary: “Soft.” / “No shit,” you say, “you’re deep between my boobs.” tags: gamer kook, soft bf jeon, extensive knowledge of the MCU (Mario Cinematic Universe) warnings: nsfw; mostly tit play, dry humping, slight praise, jizzing in ur pants like ur fifteen again wc: 3k barely 

when u have 34827 other fics to finish but ur brain hyper focuses on this image at 1 in the morning. not proofread bc idk ppl 

ty for all the nice comments on skirt chasers btw<333

There were a lot of things about Jungkook that you didn’t learn until you were official. Like the fact he rarely matches his socks unless they’re cool socks. Or that he prefers his pancakes pre-drizzled with syrup. Not necessarily bad things, just aspects the general public wouldn’t normally see. In fact, the worst “trait” you’ve learned about Jungkook in the past year is how easily distracted he can get. Nothing crazy, just tiny actions, like forgetting to eat for three hours because he refuses to leave his Wii until he can beat the guys in three rounds of Super Smash Bros. Ultimate in the Mushroom Kingdom stage. Strangely specific, but it’s Jungkook and you’ve long since learned he’s an enigma.

Times like now, when you creep up behind him as he continues screeching into his headset, voice cracking every now and then in that adorable way it does when he’s overwhelmed. You are no stranger to Jungkook’s apartment, having visited more times than you can count, and even dropping by and doing a little dusting while he was on tour. However, you’re surprised you can see the back of his coconut hair from the low backing of his new computer chair. He’d told you he recently threw away his big leather, super villain gaming chair because it’d started to tear, but it was a fact you hadn’t really paid much attention to.

Now, however, you’re feeling a little happy he did, because it means you can slide your palms around his shoulders in somewhat of a back hug. It’s way better than having to walk all the way in front of him, and you bite down on a grin when he mutters the softest “hi, baby.”

“Which stage are we battling on today?” You murmur, pinching the tip of his mic to twist it away. Faintly, you can hear Taehyung’s voice shout a greeting your way.

Another button smash of his remote, hands enveloping the tiny device. “Wii Fit Studio with Wario,” he replies, eyes flickering across the screen like his life depends on it. You snort.

“I thought you hated Wario,” you point out, and move with him when he jumps after being shot off the screen.

He looks at you for the first time as he waits for his character to respawn. “Changed my mind. He’s just misunderstood. Listen to my theory, babe,” he starts, and you let go of him because you have the back of a ninety year old war veteran and can only hunch over for so long. You take up a very bodyguard-esque position behind him, watching him play and gently pressing your thumbs into his shoulders. “Imagine this. You’re a kid trying to have fun and this other kid who looks exactly like you but better is somehow also cooler than you.”

You hum, letting go of his shoulders to toy with his hair. You pull it into a makeshift ponytail and giggle, not that Jungkook minds, too immersed in his game and his sudden loving Wario speech to care. “Then, you get older and this same dude is still getting all the credit for being exactly like you. On top of that, his little brother is doing the same to your little brother! I’d be so pissed.”

You let his hair drop, and then quickly brush the strands away from his face when he whines. “Uh huh. But theoretically speaking, aren’t you the Mario of your little universe?” Jungkook is silent. “If we’re going by your little story, I hardly doubt there’s another Jeon doing better than you,” you point out.

Jungkook’s Wario gets blown off the screen for the last time, and he’s left blankly staring at the screen. You poke his neck. “I don’t wish to discuss this further,” he says rather matter of factly. You laugh, shaking him and his seat. “Baby, why would you say that!” He cries.

You smile, flicking the switch on his headset before pushing it off his head. Jungkook moans again, head lolling back to glare up at you. “I finally come to terms with the fact that Mario is the true asshole, just to find out I’m Mario? Fucking absurd.”

You roll your eyes at his dramatics, fingers dancing down the stretched column of his neck. “Listen, no one told you to go out and create an entire deep backstory for the Mario Cinematic Universe.”

He scoffs, eyes fluttering shut as he continues basking in your soft caresses. “The MCU,” he chuckles under his breath. On screen, Taehyung is still fighting with whoever else they were playing with tonight, a little Isabelle and Dark Samus dancing across the screen.

Meanwhile, you’re still absentmindedly running your fingertips along Jungkook’s skin. For a second, you think he’s asleep by the deepening of his breaths, his body so soft and relaxed beneath your touch, but then he gets one of those weird twitches of his, and pushes his head between your breasts.

“Ah,” he sighs, eyes still shut. “Soft.”

“No shit,” you say, “you’re deep between my boobs.”

The little shit snuggles closer at your words. “My favorite place in the world,” he croons, and you pinch his neck for his stupidity. “Tell me when they’re done,” he mumbles, sounding as if he’s actually gonna fall asleep.

You relent, continuing your gentle massaging of the muscles in his neck as you tune into the match on screen. You’re not exactly sure which one Taehyung is, but your gut tells you he’s probably playing as Isabelle, so you root for her. You’re weirdly into it, jumping every time a good spar happens.

By the time the match ends (literally only like 4 minutes later) and you check on your boyfriend, he’s snuggled his way between the valley of your breasts, his cute nose poking out from between. “Oh my god,” you sigh, having to take a momentary pause to collect yourself from the sight.

Jungkook giggles.

“Well. Taehyung’s done,” you inform him, and he hums though he doesn’t really seem to care about Smash anymore. His hands go slack around his remote, crawling up to dwarf yours.

He sighs, sounding so happy with himself. “Baby, you’re so soft,” he hums, and you try desperately, and you mean desperately, to ignore the sudden drop of his voice, his hands ever so gently tangling with yours.

You try to hit him with the facts, because you know where this will go if you don’t. “Well, breasts are made up of mostly fatty tissue, and lobes for producing milk,” you inform him.

Contrary to your goal, the handsome smile that envelopes his face has you fighting down the curl in your stomach. You can never win.

“You know I love when you talk anatomical to me,” he purrs, and it takes everything in you to not punch him straight in those pearly whites.

You don’t have enough time to respond, too caught up in a mental pep talk to re-evaluate what your body considered attractive. Jungkook’s corny jokes should definitely not be high on the list, but your rock hard nipples said otherwise. “So, you gonna let me suck on them or what?”

“I hate you,” you groan, reaching over to completely unplug Jungkook’s headset because you were absolutely terrified of creating an accidental porno with your celebrity boyfriend.

Jungkook chuckles. “No you don’t,” he teased, finally wiggling his way away from you to whirl his seat around. “Could feel your nip nops pressing into my forehead. No bra today? She’s bold.”

“She’s bold and embarrassed that her boyfriend calls them nip nops,” you sigh, climbing into his lap. His remote presses hard against your thigh, and you yelp before he tugs it out and throws it on the desk behind him. Vaguely, you register the screen lighting up behind Jungkook, but then he’s nudging your shirt upwards.

He’s barely brushed his hands against you, but you’re already shivering and squirming in his lap. “Relax for me, baby,” he assures you, a new depth slowly creeping around his words. “Gonna take care of you, alright?”

You nod, breath already caught in your throat just from the way he looks at you. He flashes you another smile, bunny teeth slightly pressed against his lower lip, before he’s pushing your shirt above your chest, and marveling at your boobs.

You don’t miss the way his gaze becomes glossy, eyes hyper focused on the rise and fall of your chest. Just as you’re about to urge him to do something, he’s reaching up to brush his thumb around your nipple. “Oh,” you blurt out, the skin around your nipple rising with goosebumps.

Jungkook lets out a soft huff of air at your reaction. “So sensitive. Bet I could make you come just by touching your tits, baby.”

You scoff, choking back another sound when he does the same to the other nipple. “I wanna say I doubt it, but I feel like you’ll prove me wrong,” you retort.

At this, Jungkook smirks. “Oh, so now it’s an expectation?” He smiles, and it’s the last angelic side of him you see before he’s ducking down and latching his supple lips around your breast.

Immediately, your back arches forward, hands scrambling to grip onto his shoulders as he licks across your breast. “J-Jeon, wait—“ you cry, body shaking at the way his tongue dances around your nipple.

Your hands tangle themselves in his hair, tugging and twisting it as he flicks his tongue back and forth, knocking it against the hard pebble. You moan, and almost choke when he pulls away with a lewd pop.

His lips are glossy from his own saliva, red from the friction. He’s looking at your glistening breast like a starved man, thumb returning to glide over his own messy artwork. “So pretty,” he hums, Puckering his lips to blow a soft tuft of air against it. You shiver. “Aren’t you the softest little thing,” he says, one hand falling to your waist and gently easing you closer to his crotch. His sweatpants do nothing to conceal how he’s feeling.

You hate to admit how your insides had turned into a Fruit Gusher the second he started sucking on your boob, and now that you think of, you'd be absolutely embarrassed if you did come from just this.

As if sensing your inner turmoil, Jungkook meets your gaze. “I fucking knew it,” he says, slightly out of breath. You furrow your eyebrows, to which he pointedly raises his and gestures to his crotch. “You started pressing down so hard on me the second I got my mouth on you,” he brags, and as if to punctuate his statement, grinds his hips upward into you. “Did sucking your titty make you that wet, doll?”

Your cheeks flush at his words. Belatedly, you nod, your eyes falling to his lips that quirk up into a smile. “Oh, you’re just so desperate to be touched, aren’t you?” He continues, and then reaches up to pinch your nipple between two rough fingers.

You gasp, body arching into him. The pain is new, but definitely welcomed. “Yes,” you cry out, hand reaching out to grapple around his wrist. Though you try to tug it away, it feels disgustingly good and you know he knows, which is why he gives it a slight tug.

Finally, when he lets go of you, he doesn’t hesitate to lower himself down by your other, ignored breast. “I wanna see you cream your shorts, okay? So I’m gonna suck your other titty until you’re near tears, baby,” he states, before giving you a soft push of his hips.

“Please, be gentle,” you choke out, words stuck the moment he wraps his lips around you. This time, he’s ruthless with his tongue. He traces it all over, tonguing your nipple like a lollipop. It feels nice, the wet caress, that you don’t see that bite coming at all. You moan, body unconsciously pushing away from him in surprise.

“Nuh uh,” Jungkook tuts, strong arms wrapping around your lower back to bring you back into his embraces. This closer position has your core pressing down directly over his dick, and the sudden double stimulation has your vision momentarily going white. “Gonna give you a pretty little bite right under your tit, doll,” he announces, and in a scary act of trust, presses his fingers into your spine until you’re staring at the ceiling, the only thing supporting you his strong arms. He nudged your breast with his nose until he finds the perfect spot to place his impromptu hickey.

It’s right against the bottom curve, where your skin folds over, that he settles on. “Need you to to sit nice and still for me. You can do that, right baby?” Jungkook says, big doe eyes looking up at you. You nod your head quickly.

His teeth are cold, unlike the rest of his mouth. “Jungkook!” You moan, toes curling and thighs attempting to clamp shit. They hit the outside of the chair instead, slightly squeezing around his thin waist. “You’re s-so good to me,” you wail, pushing down into his covered cock for friction.

As much as you wanted to act like this wouldn’t affect you, your body is no liar. Fingers tangled in his long curls, you find yourself gently rutting against him. Much to your surprise, this makes him break away, a thin bridge of saliva connecting his mouth to your chest. You mourn when it finally breaks.

“Told you to stay still, doll,” Jungkook warns, one set of long fingers sprawling on the small of your back as the other reaches up. “You had all the time in the world to work yourself on me, but you wanna choose now?” He gently reprimands you, twisting your nipple between two pinched fingers. You mewl. “Promise you’ll be good?”

“I can’t,” you whine, desperation seeping into your voice as your traitorous hips jolt forward again. You nearly fall onto him when a particular nudge of his cock over your core feels just right. “Want your cock so bad,” you wail, throwing all hesitation out the window as you begin full on humping yourself against his crotch.

Jungkook sighs, trying to act annoyed with you but the twitch of his cock beneath you cannot lie. “Well I’m not done having fun with you,” he says, though the way his words are tinged with complaints, you can tell he’s trying hard not to pout. Nonetheless, he latches his mouth around your breast again, and you nearly faint when he rolls your nipple between his teeth.

“Jeon,” you cry, looking down with probably the world’s worst quadruple chin only to catch him absolutely savoring your titty. He’s got his eyes closed, pink tongue licking across every inch he can get. His arms are wrapped around the smallest part of your waist like he can’t possibly fathom letting you go. When he moans, a whole new found wetness coats your walls. You choke on a sob, “I-I love you, Jungkook.”

You can feel a smirk pressed around your breast. It’s this moment when Jungkook finally gives up on his little quest to tame you, hips bucking up to meet your offbeat grinds against him. He pulls off your breast with another wet pop, though he’s slightly lower than you from how consumed he was when sucking you tits. He has to make a little effort to stretch his neck up to look at you, and even then it’s over the top of his nose that he gazes at you.

His lips pucker slightly, and the next time you grind down onto him has them brushing against your lower lip. “That’s it,” he croons, admiring the different expressions that contort your face as you become closer and closer to your orgasm. “Come all over your pretty panties for me, baby,” he encourages, sucking your lower lip between his.

His mouth had been so dangerous to you today, licking and sucking in all the right spots, but nothing has ever felt as right as having it on yours. “I-I’m sorry,” you whimper, fingers knitting themselves in his hair.

“Don’t be,” he comforts, gripping your hips and swiveling you in a circular motion. “Next time you’ll do better, won’t you?”

You nod, head bouncing like a bobble head. He smiles, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of your mouth. Your thighs twitch. “I was gone for so long,” he rambles, hips picking up their pace the second he hears your breath hitch in your throat. “Didn’t think you’d become so sensitive and needy.”

A faint smile passes through your lips, and your toes curl and your belly tightens in that delicious way it does right before orgasm. Another grind against Jungkook, and he sighs “I love you,” as you cream your pants like a dweeby high schooler being touched for the first time.

Jungkook’s gentle movements halt the moment he sees that orgasmic face overtake you, pressing soft smooches all over the bottom half of your face, peppering your lips with them, until your fingers finally loosen in his hair.

“Fuck, I’m embarrassed,” you huff out, feeling gross and sticky in all the worst spots. Jungkook chuckles, and you can still feel his hard cock nudging the insides of your thighs.

“Nah,” he says. “It’ll make it easier for me to slide in.”

Even in your post orgasmic state, his words have a brand new coil of heat revving up. God, you were whipped for him. “Bed?” You ask, and he nods as you clamber off his lap, tugging down your shirt.

Immediately, he whirls around and catches sight of his abandon Smash game. “Huh.” He says, and you already feel the distraction staple itself into his mind. “Have you ever noticed how Dark Pit—“

You cut him off, gliding your hands around his neck and slowly craning it back until you can give him a tiny Spider-Man kiss. “If you make me cum a second time I promise I’ll listen to whatever theory you have about him,” you purr, punctuating your words with a tiny smooch.

The screen is off in record time.

[clearlyshyobservation]

Kokichi is dying (V3 chatfic, no particular ship)

TW: Infers abuse, talks about ableism, neglect, panic attack pretty much, depression, self loathing. never being good enough

i am so sorry but vr au's need to be sad, love yall :)

(Background info: This is set in a vr au, they are not with their fake memory parents (Ie; kaito's kind grandparents) but rather why they really have)

(Also i have no fucking clue what ship i was going for???? pretty sure they are all on the table, and kokichi talks like an idiot in this and i love it. Gonta's writing is based off of his Japanese talking style, so no more caveman talking).

USERNAMES:

(Space monkey: Kaito, Detective pikachu: shuichi, Elton john: kaede, Antman: gonta, Mr. Gonstealyoman: korekiyo, Atua's bitch: angie, emoboi: ryoma, be-boop: kiibo, bread roll: Maki, cum dumpster: miu, mommy: kirumi, Gremlin: Kokichi)

TLDR: Chaos ensues, slight angst

Gremlin: omfg im fucking sicK im gonna fucking die i bet this was kaitos bitch ass fault for coughing on me with his tuberculosis headass gROSSSSS I HATE EVERYTHINGGG

Space Monkey: i-

Space monkey: I didn't get you sick dumbass,,,, my tb is fugckin cured bi-

Bread roll: he's dramatic and gross dont believe him

Gremlin: yall mean for what?

Gremlin: i have a life taking disease and yall laughing i- 

Gremlin: see you at my funeral bitch

Detective pikachu: What are you sick with then

Gremlin: anythong bitch, im the universe

Antman: He sounds delusional, thats not good

Detective pikachu: He's always delusional, he's Kokichi

Mr. gonstealyoman: I guess this name is better than my old one

Mr. gonstealyoman: thank you kokichi :) I am glad we have come to an understanding

Gremlin: kay sexy

Gremlin: IGNRE WHAT I JUST SENT

Gremlin: IGNORE IT IGNORE IT IGNORE ITTTTT

Antman: who was that for???

Gremlin: NO ONE,,, 

Gremlin: Okay,,, maybe sexy tall men in general lowkey

Gremlin: okay,,,, maybe anyone over 6 feet 

Detective pikachu: i feel excluded

Detective pikachu: good, i don't like you kokichi, your an ass

Gremlin: u sound jelly shumaiiiiii

be-boop: perhaps he is telling the truth, you know,

be-boop: according to my data, in chapter four Shuichi stated that you will never have friends, and no one will ever like you

Gremlin: SHUT THE FUCK UP STOP MAKING ME FEEL BADBSKVKHDVKDSKJV

Antman: do you need me to come over? I can make you tea?

mommy: Do you know how to do that, Gonta? I can teach you?

Antman: Gonta does know, thank you very much. 

Antman: Gonta is not a child, Tojo-chan, please don't regard me as one

Antman: Gonta can cook, can clean, can be gentle, and has his own mind

Space monkey: but we're just making sure man, cuz, you know,,,, chapter 4

Antman: I am capable of things just like you!!!!!

Antman: Gonta doesn't know why you guys treat me like a child :(

Gremlin: yeah, hot stuff over there is basically a prodigy homies

Antman: Gonta is dumb though, don't say that.

Antman: Gonta is no prodigy, in fact, he is below average in everything

Gremlin: Whats ur test scores bitch

Antman: Gonta got a 98 on my english test,, but i wanted a 100, which would make Gonta actually smart :( 

Antman: Gonta is not good enough to be friends with you all

Antman: I can do basic stuff like tojo said...

Antman: maybe i do need help?

Antman: im not sure anymore:((((

Gremlin: THEY ARE ABLEIST GONTA,,, THEY FEEL SUPERIOR FOR TREATING UUUUU LIKE A CHILD

Detective pikachu: You sound really delusional Kokichi, maybe you should get sleep

Gremlin: S T F U, IM SPITTING ST8 FACTS BITCH

Detective pikachu: Sure you are. Now get some rest. 

Gremlin: GRRRR WHY WONT YOU LISTEN TO ME YOU IDIOTS??

Bread roll: Cause your stupid and aggressive

Gremlin: your personality, basically?

Bread roll: shut up at least i have a boyfriend

Gremlin: Technically, you just stole my frienemy 

Gremlin: Yall do be avoiding each other doe

Space Monkey: WE ARE NOT

Gremlin: Yeah yeah

Gremlin: yesterday i saw you to enter the same cafe by accident, duck your heads, then sit across the cafe from each other, all while  avoiding eye contact

Gremlin: Soooo,,, things not going well in paradise?

Detective pikachu: you're nosy

Gremlin: says the literal detective 

Space monkey: everythings fine your just a dickkkk

Gremlin: "oooo! Im momo-chan, i say bad word and go brrrrr"

Space monkey: im going to fucking stab him 

Gremlin: You cant, ive already enslaved you with my chaotic, yet cute hijinks, havent i~

Space monkey: STOP STOP NO NOT THE SQUIGLY

Gremlin: is it the sex? WHY DONT YOU MAKE EYE CNOTACT WITH UR LADY NO MORE 

Space monkey: ITS NOT THE SEX I HATE YOU

Gremlin: im free by the way at 8 ;)

Bread roll: STOP trying to steal my boyfriend kokichi, ive told you this before

Bread roll: NO

Bread roll: BODY

Antman: Gonta interrupts to say, Gonta loves you kokichi, and we should get flowers together, than maybe we can prank some people :D 

Bread roll: Ive never wanted to stab you more, gonta

Gremlin: I'd enjoy that very much, fine fellow ;)

Gremlin: but idk,,,, can you like take care of me first, cuz IM SICK BECAUSE OF KAITO TUBERCULOSIS ASS

Space monkey: I DONT HAVE TB ANYMORE

Gremlin: SURE YOU DONT 

Space monkey: I DONT

Gremlin:  BUT GUESS WHAT

Gremlin: YOU STILL SMOKE DUMBASS AND THATS NOT GOOD FOR U OR YOUR TUBERCULOSIS

Detective pikachu: He smokes?

Atua's bitch: he does, i walked in on him in the bathroom lmao

Atua's bitch: he was scared shitless and threw it out the window, needless to say atua does nt approve

Gremlin: DO YOU EVEN HAVE THE VACCINE????

Space monkey: Uh,,, i was taught vaccines were bad, so no i don't have the vaccine

Gremlin: I HATE OLD PEOPLE

Gremlin: ABOLISH OLD PEOPLEEEE

Gremlin: THEY SPREAD MISINFORMATION AND IT PHISCALLY HURTS ME TO SEEEEEE

Space monkey: your dramatic, it cant be that bad

Gremlin: say that when you catch it again

Gremlin: i swear you coughed on me like,,,, 5 weeks ago tho

Antman: OOOO! Fun fact: Tuberculosis can lay dormant from 3 months to a few years! 

Space monkey: u guys are just trying to scare me

Bread roll: Just checked the chat after using the br and,,m YOUDONT HAVE YOU VACCINES???

Detective pikachu: Im sorry, but kaito, please,,,,, for the love of god get vaccines

Space monkey: alright alright, ill do it cuz you guys are all on my case and i don't like being the villain :(

Gremlin: Im so happy i have gonta with me rn, he is making me tea while yall rot in your distant ass relationship (THIS IS FOR YOU KAITO)

Space monkey: Im going to destroy your bloodline in about three seconds if you dont stfu right fucking now

Gremlin: Hhehe i have an inaprwopwiate joke uwu

emoboi: STOP PLEASE DEAR GOD

cum dumpster: wHAt Is iT YOU WHORE

Gremlin: i was gonna say wouldn't he need to like,,,, have sex with my family to weed out my bloodline or something??

cum dumpster: i-

cum dumpster: Why am i acting surprised, ive watched porn with more extravagant plots than this

cum dumpster: ie; are you guys FUCKING? RIGHT INFRONT OF MY SALAD??? is one i will cherish with my soul

emoboi: hehe why did she point out the salad

Space monkey: I hate u kokichi, i truly do

Gremlin: I bet if you got the chance u would kiss me space boy :P

Bread roll has left the chat

Space monkey: o god is she ddoing one of those bf loyalty tests or smthing???

Space monkey: now im nervous lmao

Gremlin: why you so nervous stupid~~~~

Gremlin: It not like ur cheating on her homie

Space monkey: It's just a placebo effect

Gremlin: My brain feels fried Momo-chan,, i don't understand big boy words right now

Space monkey: Basically, if you take a pill that doesn't do anything but you don't know that and believe it does, you will scientifically start to feel better

Gremlin: first and only time saying this, but thank you 

Space monkey: HEHEHEB YOU SAID THANK YOU YOU SAID THANK YOUYOU SAID THANK YOUYOU SAID THANK YOUYOU SAID THANK YOU

Gremlin: Kaito,,, imma need you to do me a favor and look up on your ceiling

Space monkey: i hate you, idk what it is, but i hte you

Gremlin: good <3

Space monkey: HE REPLACED ALL MY THE STARS ON MY CELING WITH FUCKIBG DICKSSS

Space monkey: THIS IS THE LST FUCKING STRAW IM GONNA LOSE IT

Space monkey: IF MY GRANDPARENTS SEE THIS BULLSHIT THEY ARE GOING TO KILL ME, SLAP ME, MAYBE BREAK MY NECK AND DESTROY MEE

Space monkey: Im GENUINLEY panicing HOW TF am i gona get this off my wal???? They are going to bbat me senselpess help me shUichi

Detective pikachu: o god, i can sense the sheer pain and scaredness in  that tet, 

Detective pikachu: are you for real gong to get hurt or are you pulling a kokichi?

Space monkey: FUCKING HELP ME IM NOT FUCKING JOKINGKABKCB HELP THEY ARE NOT HOME RN THEY ARE LIKEE,,,, 40 MINUTES AWAY PLEASEE 

Gremlin: okay,,, maybe this wasn't the best prank.,,, i guess i'll help clean up cuz im not that much of a sociopath

Gremlin: tbh my parents can go shove it too lowkey terrible 0/10 

Space monkey: AHHHH IM SO SCARED PLS PSL GET HERE FAST

be-boop: Of course, i will come, i will survey the outside of the house

Antman: Gonta is coming too! We will get this done in under 40 minutes!

Space monkey: OKAY

Gremlin: Lowkey, if i cough on you ignore it bitch your the one who made me like this

Space monkey: W HA TDONT COUGH ON ME IM NOT SICK ANYMORE

Gremlin: I will give you TB again just cuz your making me suffer

Space monkey: Suffer what??? putting dicks on my FUCKING WALL???

Gremlin: Guilt, idiot, im feeling guilty. 

cum dumpster: oof thats new

emoboi: yeah i wasn't expecting it

Mr.gonstealyoman: Me neither. It is rather peculiar seeing it being texted by him because he is always feels not guilty of his bad actions.

be-boop: I do believe he means it, though...

emoboi: impossible.

cum dumpster: i agree, literally impossible.

Gremlin: I HAVE A FUCKIBG SOUL YOU CRazY CONSPIRACISTS

Antman: Quick question, shuichi can i stay with you again? It'll be dark when i get home and gonta can't do that so,,, please help

Detective pikachu: my parents are like blank slates, who eat slowly, watch tv slowly, and never look at me. Im sure they wouldn't mind :P

Antman: ALRIGHT! :D LETS GET MISSION: MR. MOMOTA ROOM REPAIR DONE!

Gremlin: ooo! I like the name! IM INNNN! 

Detective pikachu: On it!

be-boop: Ready for look out!

Space monkey: I love you guys :)

AN: Im lowkey sorry i ended this chaotic mess with angst,,,, but like fr i love it i love angst,, i hate reading it but love writing it

[jumin-deserves-better]

My thoughts on all the Mystic messenger characters and their routes :

Ok, last week I finished playing the mystic messenger game. I completed all the routes, DLCs etc. And, OMG, WHAT A RIDE WAS THAT ! . It doesn't have any appealing plot like other otome games, but this game sure did capture my heart,which most of the otome games fail to do so. The fact I could relate to some of the characters, I felt bad for them, concerned, weirded out at times , and so happy when they changed into a happy person because of me. The game deserves all the praise it gets, 10/10 👍

In this post, I will give my rating based on my playthrough for each character, and I will also say who is my true route as well, i.e, the route I fell in love the most, And please remember, these are based on MY opinions alone, please don't come at me, if it doesn't match yours 👀, Feel free to share your opinions about the characters as well & this post is way long beware ~☆

My playthrough order : I followed the recommended playthrough to get a clear picture of the storyline.

Zen 》Yoosung》 Jaehee》 Jumin 》 Seven》 V 》 Ray.

And for your kind information, I never played this game to get a bad ending, i didn't want to hurt those precious fictional characters just for getting one CG 🤐, but I do know what happens

SPOILER FREE!, I will be just giving MY OWN ratings , except for the rika part lol don't worry, ladies.!

Anyways, let's just jump into it ;),

Zen 🤍:

THAT SMIRK THOUGH 😏

His route : 9/10 ( not the best route, but I liked it anyways, as he is my 1st route)

His character: 8/10 ( I don't like narcissism or narcissistic people, I know it was his coping mechanism, but I kind of dislike those type of men, his attitude in Jumin's route, kinda pissed me off apart from that , he is great ! )

Is he my true route ? : NO, I don't like guys who are narcissistic, I understand that that its was his coping mechanism, to make him believe in himself, but still being narcissistic all the time is not ok, I have a bad memory because of those type of guys, moreover, I am not that confident irl 😂 , I mean the MC in Zen's route,will have to say lots of weird ass choices, and the fact that will impress him⁉️, i wouldn't even say those choices irl to anyone . I wouldn't mind being friends with him though. He is definitely the ideal BF material, but he is just isn't for me..Sorry, Zen.😅

Yoosung 💚 :

AWW CUTIE 🥺💕

His route : 9/10 ( apart from the "You are just like Rika", I personally enjoyed his route, the character development was the best at the end 👌)

His character : 9/10 (OMG! He is just so cute, I am not the one to get attracted to the 'younger guy' type, but this guy just changed everything for me, but he needs lots of attention , beware, yandere yoosungs will pop out if u don't care about him enough, and the fact this guy was the only one who was supportive for Jumin's relationship with MC in Jumin's route , showed how much of a cutie he is!, unlike others 😒, he was a bit annoying in V's route, but it is understandable, he deserves to knw the truth about the person who he admires )

Is he my true route ? : Kind of a YES & a NO. Eventhough I enjoyed his route more than Zen, like I said earlier I am not into those 'younger guy' type, he is a guy who loves to be babied and protected by a mature MC , and well...I am not that mature either 😛,in reality, I am a independent person, but when it comes to relationships, i liked to be babied 😏. I personally think he deserves someone better than me, I don't want to ruin his happiness 🥺

Jaehee 🤎 :

A friend in need is a friend indeed, my bae,Jaehee! 😄

Her route : 7/10 ( ok, I am gonna be honest here, I did not enjoy her route, I was happy that she realized her dreams and goes for it, but do we have to ruin a character just for making this route dramatic? Yes, I am talking about Jumin, Do u guys even know, how much I struggled to even start Jumin's route, I was literally scared of him because of his potrayal in this route as that jerk which he was btw,this route actually made me avoid Jumin for sometime.I expected the relationship between Jumin and Jaehee to become a healthy one, but oh well, whatever, & the after ending was just frustrating,all the RFA members just isolated Jumin, seriously, eventhough he did wrong things ,I felt so bad for him, imagine his thoughts at that moment , ugh...Jaehee deserves a better route, I am just not a fan of 'downgrading one character to give more importance to the main one', it's just bad writing)

Her character : 8/10 ( she is an amazing friend, a bit mature one at that. But personally i felt , if she really wanted to pursue her dreams ,she could have resigned, if she is not liking it . She was behaving a bit ignorant at times, especially in Zen's route. She could have communicated with Jumin beforehand about her difficulty in handling the job? I knw it's very difficult to suddenly quit the job, but she has every right to resign,she does have the money to open a coffee shop, thn why?. Don't come at me, and tell me that I hate her just because she is a female character,HELL NO, I like her but still her route made me have mixed feelings. She was being rude at times , I really understood why CHERTIZ did this, to show women can liberate themselves to work for their dreams, but in a professional point of view, I still think the route could have been handled better. Small businesses success isn't as easy to get, and in my point of view it would have been nice to show how MC and Jaehee make it through in her route rather than making Jumin a jerk, because it ruined Jumin at first for not only me but also a number of players ,but oh well,🏃‍♀️, I do like her, she could be a great friend, nothing more that that )

Is she my true route? : NO, I am straight. I see Jaehee as a friend. Some ask a romantic route for her, but I don't mind about that , I was just glad that I could help her to realize her dreams as a FRIEND.

Jumin 💜 :

I don't see a selfish jerk here, I see a soft boi , in a gigantic body, who is just lonely

His route : 10/10 ( Seriously, I did not expect to like his route one bit, I thought I would hate him more, but turns out, I freaking fell in love with the flawed "him" , HECK YEAH! this was the only route where i was being TRUE TO MYSELF, did not refer any guides, understood his loneliness, I could relate to him so bad, I was happy to help him during his vulnerable times 🤧.Zen was annoying ,but I didn't care much about it, because I knw why he was like this. I prefer the good ending, and yes he does propose for marriage to whom he have talked for only 11 days, but I was very sure he will listen to you, if u don't want the marriage immediately )

His character : 9/10 ( He is so cute in his own way,mature, intelligent,awkward and even gets insecure,because he thinks he does not deserve you?! , you deserve better than me ,Jumin 😫, he does get possessive and irrational and that could make others uncomfortable, but for me, I understood that as well, being an empath myself ,as this dude never had a relationship with anyone,he is new into this, I don't mind teaching him new things about the world, about love. His characterization in Jaehee's route was god awful and cheritz did a bad job in it , I think they decided to make him like this, just for DRAMA,Jumin might have a bad way of showing emotions but he is not a soul less demon. I have seen people calling Jumin an abuser, but I didn't see that at all, he was being an idiot and he acknowledges it, every damn time, an abuser doesn't do this at all, and no..I don't think Jumin is dominant daddy material one bit like how the fandom perceives him. This is his first relationship with a woman, I feel he would be sweet, embarrassed loving and a loyal husband material, and I love his "opposed to living together before marriage" thing as well, as my religion follows that too as well )

Is he my true route? : A. BIG. FAT. YES. HE IS JUST MY TYPE, dear lord. I have never seen someone so perfect and also with flaws just like me , this guy made me realize that all along, I just never showed empathy towards others and that's why no one wanted to talk to me irl, I didn't care what people told about me. He seriously made me understand my own flaws and I corrected it, he made me into a better person, big thx , Mr.Jumin . Morever , I was being myself in his route only, I loved all of his calls , he brings up the strangest things just to talk to you, that's just so cute WTH , this man will be so loyal I am sure of it !.I don't really care about his riches, I am just in love with his true self 😫🥺

707 ❤ :

The main man of this game, hmmm....

His route : 7/10 ( ok, I was so hyped to play his route , cuz even before I started to play this game, 707 was so popular, I expected a lot, but it was a meh for me...he did have a VERY HEARTBREAKING PAST , he was suffering from a lot of things, I understand. But the whole route wasn't that gud though...and his secret endings are just painfully depressing and angsty, V's death just broke my heart, I felt so frickin bad for Jumin, how would he even handle those things?.It just destroyed me completely. Moreover I don't find 707's jokes funny at times, his route had good plot, but 707 failed to impress me in his own route)

His character : 7/ 10 ( oh boi,I am scared that I would be slaughtered with hatred for telling this, the fact that he was faking his own personality was very shocking to me, I did not expect that. I despise tsunderes ,and 707 is the literal definition of it, so yeah, It ended up being annoying for me. Even though I was hella depressed like 707 before, I couldn't find him #relatable at all. I don't knw why , but I couldn't see him more than a friend 🚶‍♀️)

Is he my true route? : NOPE. I was not impressed by him at all, don't knw why lol, I tried to like him as he is THE REAL TRUE ROUTE,but it is still not getting into my heart, maybe because I already started to love Jumin, idk. I felt bad for 707, I wouldn't mind helping him as a friend, but as a significant other...NAH....,I am not into these type of guys 🥴,sorry seven...

V 💙 :

I can understand why Jumin and V were best friends...they be looking like DADDY 👀

His route : 8 /10 ( for me, I was happy that V finally understood that he was basically a obsessive simp for Rika, I hated that he blamed himself more, which somehow I agree, I feel like he could have said something to the RFA , yoosung was hella annoying in this route, he spoke as if Rika is an angel or something, which she is not btw, yoosung, she brainwashed saeran and freakin created a cult, and this is not something an angel would do 🥴, V is not just flawed or anything,he doesn't even love himself,and so clings to rika because she was so wonderful in her eyes as an idea .He kept the freakin truth hidden,just because Rika doesn't want to, of course, my baby,yoosung will ask about . V is too emotional,and he was a victim of rika's abuse and manipulation just like Saeran,I liked the plot and though I didn't fall in love with him , I did have a tinsy bit of crush on him, mainly because of his looks, more like a puppy love, the voice acting was on point 👌)

His character : 7/ 10 ( boi could have handled the situation with his crazy GF much better, he actually let Saeran get brainwashed by Rika, he could have done something, and the fact that he liked Rika only as an idea, showed that this guy was in a very toxic relationship, Rika and V are the perfect example of what happens when two people who doesn't love themselves date, and he was clearly the victim of Rika's abuse and manipulation. I also don't think he is an angel either, he has done some wrong things definitely, and the fandom should acknowledge his wrong doings)

Is he my true route? : NO. Though Jumin and V are very similar , I did not like the fact that he simped for his crazy GF out of his obsession alone and though, she was clearly showing red flags earlier, he thinks that the power of love can change her lol . He was so confusing for me to understand. 😂

Ray 💖 :

His route : 10/10 ( The drama , the music, the plot & the voice acting was just fantastic, I was blown away by this route, but that doesn't mean I liked Saeran as a character, the boi needs therapy, not romance lol, sry,and the recovery from his brainwashed state was unrealistic )

His character : 7/10 ( seriously, the voice acting for both the personalities was just mind blowing, he is such a well written character, but his abandonment issues isn't something u should romanticize about, he loved the affection that the MC was giving , but one wrong move, he will change just like that , he confused affection with love. Some are telling that Jumin was abusive, which he is not btw , for me, suit Saeran was super abusive, WTH)

Is he my true route ? : HELL NO. Eventhough he was practically innocent because he was under the influence of that elixir or some kind of a drug and brainwashed by Rika , I would never in my life try to have a romantic relationship with those kind of people. I may like him after he receives proper therapy ,but NO, just No, I can help him as a person, but I wouldn't go for a kiss or something with him. 🙄

Rika 💔:

This scene still gives me goosebumps 🙄

Her character : -infinity / 20 ( she deserves this uwu)

SPOILERS AHEAD!

Ok, hear me out, I hate Rika so much , i know she has been through a lot, i really do.. but it doesn't mean you can emotionally abuse and brainwash Saeran, he would have been a better person,she turned a person who loves ice cream and cloud watching into a self destructive psycho, another story showed how much she is capable of by her words , She manipulated V to not tell RFA that she is gonna start a cult, WHAT THE HELL, V, do you not knw what she is trying to do here 😳 ? But whatever,V was being manipulated by her "playing as a victim" tactics, she also played with Jumin's feelings for her, I was about to throw my hands on her, how dare u do that to my man ??, made yoosung to obsess over her to make him think that she is absolutely a gud person, and left him to ponder over her so called 'passing' , making him unable to move on from her.

And oh god,the backstory did not make me feel bad for her one bit, it only made me understand why she has become like this. Like dude, I understood she had a shitty past, but so did the other members of RFA, but did they all become like a manipulative victim player? Hell no.. they learned from their mistakes and they change, but even when all the members were trying to help her, she denies that she doesn't need a therapy. She deserves a proper mental therapy and a proper jail time. NO EXCUSE FOR THAT, she did the same manipulation and brainwashing for all of her disciples to get them into Mint eye.

But as a character , Rika just rocked it for me , she was so successful in making me and a lot of the fans hate her as an antagonist. Her voice actor was so gud,she had such a good way of speaking manipulative, like God, I understood why all the RFA members were all kind of whipped for her, she is such a master piece as an antagonist. 🚶‍♀️🤫

Vanderwood 💞👀 :

I NEED A VANDERWOOD ROUTE 😫

His character: 10/10 idk, why am I giving a rating for him though? I just love him 😂

Ok, I know he is a side character, but for some reason, I liked him more than 707 lol 👀, I just spoke with him only in one chatroom , but boi , was I whipped for him 😜

*******************************************

My favourite to least MM main characters and routes :

JUMIN - 19/20 ( 1st)

YOOSUNG - 18/20 (2nd)

ZEN & RAY - 17/ 20 ( 3rd)

V & JAEHEE - 15 / 20 ( 4th )

707 - 14 / 20 ( 5th, it's not that I hate him or something, it's just that I was neither IMPRESSED by his character nor the route, I don't mind him one bit! )

Rika -Though she doesn't have a route or a gud character she deserves a -infinity/20 ( and no place in my heart 🚶‍♀️)

Overall, this game is the best otome game ! , I actually paid for getting the hourglasses, I mean, I suck at patience, I was so intrigued by the story, but it was seriously worth it !. There are a number of otome games which charge more than this.

Anyways,

Thank you, Cheritz for creating Mystic messenger. This game totally changed how I perceived life, love ❤ and Romance 💕

[peaceisadirtyword]

hi! so i saw your post about possible ivar drabbles and was thinking about when ivar was getting his back tattooed when ubbe and hvitserk ask him why he has a personal bodyguard lol. i had an idea about maybe ivar takes you when you get your first tattoo. idk if that's any good but i thought it could be a good fluffy ivar idea. hope you're staying safe and well💖

A/N: I loved this one💜 especially because I’m getting a tattoo when all of this is over (in fact I was going to get it in March but then corona happened) and it’s a viking rune. I’m quite scared and I wish Ivar would come with me :( but, unfortunately, that won’t happen🌚 so I'll just put on a brave face. 

These days my writing is absolutely terrible, I'm really sorry💔 at least I can actually write now! Today I could only write this one because I had a lot of work, but tomorrow I'll try to post at least two. I hope you like it and thank you for your request love😘

Warnings: mentions of sex, Ivar being the perfect bf, pain and my bad writing 

Words: 990 (I'm getting there)

Ivar stopped in front of a building that made you bit your lip and look at him with a frown, a bit worried. The place wasn't exactly what you considered "a really professional business", as your boyfriend had said when you told him you wanted to get a tattoo. But all of his tattoos were beautiful, and he got them there, so it couldn't be that bad, right? 

You had decided you wanted a tattoo after Ivar asked for your help to apply the lotion over the new tattoo he had gotten on his back. You stared at the beautiful design in awe as you massaged his skin, and your next words were: 'I want to get one'. 

Ivar hadn't believed you at first, but you had insisted and finally he had called Arne, a friend of his that had a tattoo studio in town and who had designed and made all of his and his brothers' tattoos. You wanted something small, and Ivar suggested a vegvísir; the runic compass that, according to vikings, was a symbol of protection and guidance. You liked the meaning and the design, so you agreed. 

And there you were, a few weeks later and much more scared. Taking these kind of decisions was much easier when you had Ivar's lips on your neck and he whispered how sexy you'd be with a viking tattoo decorating your skin. 

"Will it hurt?" You asked squeezing his hand. Ivar chuckled and kissed your cheek before answering. 

"Yes" he winked at you "But I'll be there and I'll let you break my hand if you need it" 

You sighed and looked at the door. You hated the pain. 

"Hey" Ivar's tone softened. He had been teasing you and laughing at the faces you made every time he told you it'd hurt a bit "You don't have to do it, okay? It's only if you want to, it's your body, your tattoo and your decision" 

"I want to" you frowned "But I'm nervous, weren't you nervous when you got your first tattoo?" 

"Not really" he raised an eyebrow "Ubbe and Hvitserk took me to get it, and I supposed that, if Sigurd being a coward could get one without crying, I wouldn't have any problem" he shrugged "And I'm used to feel pain, so... It wasn't that bad"

"Okay" you took a deep breath "Let's do this" 

He nodded, letting go of your hand to open the door so you could enter the local. 

A giant man, with blonde hair and a long beard, was sitting behind a wooden counter, full of drawings and designs. He raised his head when he heard you and his lips curved in a smile when Ivar entered behind you. 

"Lothbrok!" he laughed "Missed me already?" 

Ivar chuckled as you stood there awkwardly, looking around the room. 

"Arne" he greeted him, approaching the counter to hug him and pat his back softly.

"How is the tattoo? I'm sure it looks even more beautiful now that is healed" 

"It looks amazing" Ivar nodded "Absolutely beautiful, you're an artist, my friend" 

"I know, I know, you're welcome" Arne chuckled, making Ivar smile "How can I help you today?" 

Ivar turned to look at you, smiling when he saw you touching your hair and biting your lip softly, something you did when you were nervous. 

"This is Y/N, my girlfriend" he took your hand and squeezed it softly "She wants a tattoo too, got jealous of mine" 

"Oh yeah, I remember" Arne smiled at you "Ivar told me you wanted a vegvísir, right?" 

You nodded shyly as he opened a book full of designs. You noticed that almost all of them were viking symbols. 

"I have some different designs, so just choose the one you like the most" he smiled gently at you. 

"Okay, thank you" you muttered as you took the book. Your eyes widened in awe as you saw the designs. Ivar hadn't lied, that man was very good. 

Ivar let you choose, looking at the drawings over your shoulder and caressing your waist softly, knowing you were nervous and needed some type of comfort. 

You chose a simple design; it was pretty and small and Ivar hummed in approval when you pointed at it. 

"Beautiful" Arne winked at you "Okay, where do you want it?" 

"I was thinking on my back" you shrugged "Maybe on my shoulder blade? Somewhere where I can't see it constantly and regret it" 

Arne laughed and nodded. 

"Okay love, go behind that curtain, take your shirt off and sit on the chair, I'll be there in a couple of minutes" 

"Thank you" you muttered as Ivar guided you. 

You took your shirt off, feeling self conscious even if you saw Ivar's eyes darken and he licked his lips. 

"Relax" his hand caressed your thigh as he sat on a wooden chair next to you "You're in good hands, and I'm here, everything will be okay" 

You nodded, smiling at him and leant in to kiss his lips softly. 

"Thank you for coming with me" you muttered. 

He just kissed you again, just before Arne appeared again and started preparing everything. 

"Don't be nervous" the blonde man winked at you "After putting up with Ivar, this would be nothing" 

You couldn't help but laugh as Ivar raised an eyebrow at him, but you saw his lips curve upwards. 

It hurt, maybe a bit less than you expected, but you teared up a bit and nearly broke Ivar's fingers a couple of times, but when it was over, and as Arne went to clean the tools, Ivar kissed you again and pressed his forehead against yours. 

"I'm proud of you, my little viking" he smirked "It looks amazing on you, even better than I imagined... I can't wait to get home..." His tone darkened and you tensed up, pressing your thighs together "And fuck you until you can't even walk"

[deanothecheynosaur]

The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Part 3 (2020)

**SPOILERS**

Ok, I have already completed the season, but I'm still gonna break it down episode by episode and give my thoughts during in retrospect. If you have not seen Parts 1 or 2, I recommend you start there.

Chapter 21: The Hellbound Heart

So, Sabrina (Kiernan Shipka) is trying to get Nick Scratch (Gavin Leatherwood) back out of hell and separated from Lucifer (Luke Cook). If you had forgotten, during part 2 Sabrina found out that Lucifer Morningstar was her biological father, and they trapped Lucifer inside of Nick. She enlists Roz (Jaz Sinclair), Harvey (Ross Lynch), and Theo (Lachlan Watson) to help. Besides the fact that their all besties, I have no idea what help Harvey or Theo would be. Theo is at least loyal and listens to reason. Harvey just goes off all the time. Roz is the most useful with her "cunning." Anyway. Before they figure out how to get to Hell, Mrs. Wardwell (Michelle Gomez) comes back to Baxter High with a new obsession with Dante's Inferno. But she's not possessed by Lilith (Michelle Gomez) anymore; Lilith is too busy defending her title as Queen of Hell. Also, props to Michelle Gomez. She flawlessly played two very different characters this season. Meanwhile, Zelda (Miranda Otto) and Hilda (Lucy Davis) are trying to save the coven because their powers are all fading. They aren't sure what to do with the remaining students or what to tell them. All of their powers are a gift from Lucifer, but he's not really in the position (or the mood) to be giving them any powers. Down in New Orleans, Ambrose (Chance Perdomo) and Prudence (Tati Gabrielle) are on their mission to find her father. When they come up short, they turn to Voodoo Priestess Mambo Marie (Skye P. Marshall) to help them with a different kind of magic. Dorian Gray (Jedidiah Goodacre -that is quite a name-) helps Sabrina and friends to get into Hell as long as they bring him a magic flower. They go in without any real plan, as you do. Seriously. Not even a map. Wtf. Luckily, they walked into the Shores of Sorrow and met Caliban (Sam Corlett), who told them to follow the river of blood because "all blood leads to Pandemonium." That's the capitol city of Hell I guess? They have lots of fun on the way, and when they get there, Lilith says that Sabrina has to deal with the Kings of Hell for her, but Lucifer tells Sabrina that she has to take the throne for herself. It has to be a Morningstar. Well, she does, but the Kings aren't convinced. Then our friend Caliban shows up again, naming himself Prince of Hell, and challenging Sabrina for the throne. It is worth noting that Caliban is ridiculously hot. And generally shirtless. Sabrina accepts the throne to get Nick out of Hell. Which is problematic for a lot of reasons, but most of all that she decides to do this BEFORE separating him from Lucifer. So she's just gonna keep Nick/Lucifer tied up in the dungeon until she finds another flesh acheron to hold Lucifer. What could go wrong?

I really expected it to take longer for Sabrina to get to Nick, but considering the very twisted maze part 3 went down, getting to Pandemonium is pretty minor. Also, Sabrina's whole "I'ma do what I want and not tell my aunts so they don't stop me" is getting old.

Chapter 22: Drag Me to Hell

This one is a little less convoluted. Sabrina finds out that one of her duties as Queen is to drag souls to Hell. Specifically souls who have made a deal with the devil. We can infer from this that the only people who go to Hell are those who have sold their soul, so it would be far easier to not go there than some people in the real world would have me believe. The first soul, a cute old man who wanted to be chess Grand Champion, Sabrina decided to show mercy and sent him to heaven. Didn't go over super well with the Kings of Hell. Also, Sabrina is now a cheerleader at Baxter High. They call themselves the Ravenettes. There's a dance team from my high school called the Raiderettes, so that confused me for a sec. Lots more singing pop songs then actual cheers though. Reminds me of the Jailhouse Rock scene in Riverdale. I digress. Zelda has decided to reopen the academy and that she and Hilda were going to teach. Hilda was more voluntold. Agatha (Adeline Rudolph) doesn't really respond well. Prudence and Ambrose discover that Father Blackwood (Richard Coyle) is in Loch Ness, which is apparently super magical and can bend time and space? Idk, but I was highly disappointed that we didn't see Nessie. They see him at the very end of the episode looking like Mr. Bean at the end of the live action Scooby-Doo movie. They take him back to Greendale and use him to hold Lucifer so Nick can be free. Because what the world needs is Blackwood and Lucifer together. Back to Brina. Her second soul to collect (apparently this is a daily task for the ruler of Hell but she only does these two so there's a plot hole) is the ice cream man, Jimmy Platt (Matty Finochio). He tells her that he would like to extend his contract again by eating the heart of an innocent child. Sabrina confronts Lucifer about this later, apparently it didn't have to be a child, just an innocent soul. Adult virgins, beware. Sabrina tells Jimmy no (obvi) but Jimmy has already hidden the kid. So now she has to find this kid and collect his soul before the end of the day or there will be a coup in Hell. Sabrina wisely decides on just Roz to help her with this one. Roz is also the one who warns Sabrina against transporting herself into a freezer with no more information, but as per usual Sabrina goes anyway. Jimmy put warding sigils on the walls, so she's stuck and powerless. Luckily, Lilith knows what the fuck she's doing (as opposed to Sabrina who only thinks she does) and saves Sabrina. Sabrina takes Jimmy to Hell, but nobody is impressed. Caliban officially challenges her to find the unholy regalia- the three most powerful infernal objects, starting with Herod's crown.

This is a pretty typical Sabrina episode- she's way in over her head, but she either doesn't realize it or won't admit it. I'm never quite sure, but it seems like she genuinely doesn't know. I also don't remember if it's this episode or the next, but Harvey is suddenly feeling under a lot of pressure to have sex with Roz. But it never shows Roz being pushy about it, so idk wtf is going on in Harvey's head (besides convincing himself he's over Sabrina).

Chapter 23: Heavy is the Crown

For this one, Sabrina enlists Ambrose to help her find the crown because Ambrose is the most well read warlock ever due to his permanent house arrest. It's in Riverdale. They use a special compass to find it in a maple tree that the Blossom's use for syrup. If you've seen Riverdale, this probably has more significance and is less surprising. They steal the crown (somehow without realizing zombie King Herod is still in the tree). Sabrina wants to destroy it, but Ambrose wants to tap into its power to help the coven. Unsurprisingly, this does not work out well for them initially because Herod follows the crown and would very much like it back. Zelda is failing at getting respect from the students at the academy, and there's weird Lucifer beetles crawling in ears and controlling people. In other news, a carnival came to town! Obviously this has something to do with the larger plot because otherwise it would be a side note. Harvey, Roz, Sabrina, Nick, and Theo are all going together. Theo wants to invite the new guy, Robin (Jonathan Whitesell), because Theo is crushing hard. Robin is nerdy cute, I guess. I did think it was cliche to give the queer guy green streaks in his hair though. Harvey says tells Theo to invite him as part of the group, which Theo does, and Robin agrees. They all go to the carnival: Roz, Sabrina, and Theo ignorantly happy, Harvey struggling with his masculinity, Nick struggling with his ordeal, and Robin just happy to be there. Roz "sees" the carnival ringmaster as a satyr (or a faun depending on your preference for Greek or Roman deities, but they do tend to prefer Greek in this show), but she decides she was imagining things. Mrs. Wardwell talks to the fortune teller Circe (Lucie Guest) to try to find out what happened to her during the three months that Lilith was using her "skin suit." She doesn't get any concrete answers because that's not how fortune tellers work, Mary. Harvey stumbles across a snake charmer dancer woman in a tent full of pervy dudes and is almost entranced. Hilda goes to the carnival with her bf Dr. C, who proposes. Idk why she needed to throw her cotton candy on the ground during that, but I'm also on a sugar detox, so... Prudence and Ambrose are cleaning up Blackwood's mess by putting a living doll spell on Judas and Judith to hide them and putting his weird time warping monster fish egg thing in a fish tank. Yeah. No Nessie, but a weird egg. It's fine, I'm not bitter. Back at the carnival, Sabrina and Nick get attacked by Herod (who stole his crown back from Ambrose but knows it was Sabrina stealing it initially). Ambrose saves them, but Caliban pops in, steals the crown, and wins the first round of the challenge. At the very end, we find out why the carnies are important: they're pagans who worship the old gods and trying to resurrect The Green Man to rid the world of flesh since the Satanic witches have all but lost their powers. There is more than one voodoo practitioner, idk why they're not considered more of a threat because they're much more independently magical. They need a virgin to complete the rebirth, and that's why Robin (dun dun dun) was hanging out at the high school. Our potential virgins are Theo, Harvey, and Mrs. Wardwell.

I chose not to believe that Robin was actually bad because I want Theo to be happy. I chose to believe that even if he was using Theo, Robin was just trying to take his virginity to prevent him from being the sacrifice. Also, Sabrina is basically trying to force Nick to be normal even though she compared his symptoms to PTSD. Girl stop. He needs a sec.

Chapter 24: The Hare Moon

Zelda and Hilda have decided that the coven needs to celebrate the hare moon for the coming of spring to bolster good will. Sabrina isn't enthused (maybe because it requires her singing a song of summer into the forest to release a rabbit). Lilith tells Sabrina that they need celestial power to restore their strength, so she goes to Dorian, who has an angel trapped in one of his paintings (as all art collectors do). Sabrina drains some blood from the angel for her coven, but leaves in the process because she hears some screaming. Then she stumbles upon Nick and some sex demons doing BDSM. She's less than thrilled, especially since Nick low-key blames her for it. And Dorian has drank 90% of the angel blood, but they can't take anymore with killing him. So Hilda suggests using the little blood to make an oil mixture and take a moon bath under the hare moon (rub oils all over your skin and lie outside under the full moon) to absorb the celestial energy from the moon. During the daytime ceremony, they meet the pagans. Things don't go well. Zelda makes a bunch of petty insults, Hilda pisses off Circe, and Nick kills me the snake that bit Dorcas (Abigail Cowen). Circe puts a curse on Hilda to become a spider, and

[happyhippystuff]

Some things:

- went for my first embroidery class and it’s therapeutic. Low key thought that I would get bored bc short attention span but I guessed i lasted through the class 🖖

- finally finally visited Kim’s family restaurant, which I’ve been telling the bf about since... 2018 hahaha t’was gud :-)

- signed up for f45 trial and figured that I really don’t like it anymore

- has a rly short catch up with j yesterday which was lovely. The last time we spoke was probably when we were both still at Farrer Park aka more than half a year ago and tbh, I didn’t think we will meet ever again just bc... we bonded through f45 and now that there’s no more f45. Anyhow, it makes me realise how I treat most relationships as ‘functional’ and fleeting - I don’t actually form real and deep r/s with people easily bc... idk people leave and ??? Also, j was sharing with me her problems w her bf, and after which, she texted I’m so proud of you, you seem a lot more stable and secure in your r/s as compared to when you first told me about him I laughed because... I forgot where I started and how much of a omg what the heck is this I was. Growth, I guess.

- went back for my second appt and in the waiting area, I thought to myself, everyone looks so normal as though I was expecting mental illness to have ‘a look’. Was a pretty quick one, got referred for therapy which I’m still sitting on bc $$$$. Note to self: ask to be downgraded to a subsidised patient.

- been thinking a lot about what’s next recently and if I rly still want to pursue a masters in clinical psychology. Firstly, the journey is just too much of a hassle. Secondly, I’ve new priorities in my life now. And lastly, is it what I really want? I don’t know, but yesterday at UL, someone shared that opportunities are from God and not our resumés which was timely, bc a lot of times I don’t apply for stuff bc I don’t have a relevant experience/ good enough experience but yes, if it’s meant to be, it will be.

- I really really really dislike being around new/ unfamiliar people. And I guess I really have very little people I would consider myself familiar with but it just triggers so much anxiety in me :-( like when the bf left me to sit with his family, it’s not as tho I wasn’t close to them but it just made me feel so anxious bc the bf isn’t there and I just wanted to cry. And at UL when there were new people, even tho there were familiar faces too...... I just wanted to cry. Oh man story of my life

- been scrolling through insta and seeing how many of my friends are doing better, which I guess it’s good for them but it also just makes me feel rly shitty about myself. I know recovery is not a race and at your own pace but I just feel so UGH why am I still stuck in this terrible loop.

- also, I say this all the time but I just rly want to be skinny and beautiful :(

[sowhatgguk]

protect my heart - myg

REQUESTED: #25 w/ yoongi - “why don’t you understand?”

it’s been sitting in the drafts for a while, but since school has started and work isn’t as hectic, i decided to post this before i forgot. i have one more request, it’s coming soon! send in more through my ask :)

WARNING: um idk i don’t think it’s that angsty but if you’re very emotional this can be kinda sad? yoongi!bf, heartbreak, mentions of cheating and sad stuff i guess 

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

You stare at the message, wondering if there was something wrong. But you figured it was due to stress, so you ignored that feeling. Making Yoongi angry wasn’t something you planned to do.

You’d head to the restaurant and pick a few of his favourite things. Just to make sure he eats and sleep well at the studio. And then you’d head home. As much as yoongi hated being bothered, you knew you had to take care of his health. Sometimes, he doesn’t know his limits.

You spend time around the house watching television, checking social media and then taking a shower to get ready. you make sure to put a mask on your face before heading outside. No one would suspect you, everyone wore them in this cold weather.

But as you approach bighit’s company building, your cellphone seems to weigh heavy in your pocket. You push aside your thoughts, you were here to take care of your boyfriend and not annoy him.

You knock lightly on his studio door, the bag of food feeling heavy. You place your ear to the door, not hearing a thing. Maybe he’s sleeping? You think to yourself not before slowly opening the door.

What you see hurts your heart. Yoongi is sleeping on the couch cuddling a girl. You don’t even know her, or understand why she would be in his studio that close anyways. Maybe she replaced you.

You quietly place the food on a small table, being careful not to make a mess with his equipment everywhere. You spot a small piece of paper and pen. You write a small note to yoongi.

Hey, I noticed you fell asleep and I didn’t want to bother you and your friend. I got your favourites, make sure to warm them up. I wanted to make sure you’re eating well and sleeping well. I’m glad. Please don’t stress yourself, and take care of yourself yoongs. Because I won’t be able to do that anymore. I love you.

Y/N

in the midst of your shuffling, the noise caused yoongi to stir. You met his horrified gaze once he realized his position. He carefully tried to get up, but you gave him a sad smile.

Goodbye Min Yoongi.

You place the pen down onto the table and quietly closed the door. You walk to the elevator when you hear his footsteps. So you decide to take the emergency exit stairs 5 flights down.

You’re biting your lip, fighting your tears as you bolt down the stairs. Not bothering to be quiet, you pushed the exit door with all the energy you have and book it to your car. You lock the door, trying to breathe.

You rub your face with your hands, not caring if your makeup was ruined. The space between you and him get evidently smaller, and your lungs constrict. A panic attack.

You laugh bitterly. Getting all riled up because of a man. You promised yourself that you would never let a man affect you like this. But you never thought that man would be min yoongi.

Your hands shakily reach to press the START button to rev the engine. You see yoongi burst out the back door, frantically looking for you. He spots you crying in your car but before he can run to you, your car is leaving the parking lot. Leaving him behind.

You force yourself to turn up the radio to drown out his yelling. You refuse to be foolish. Perhaps you did have some dignity; call it pride. You had enough of people manipulating you, using you as if you were there for pure convenience.

But deep inside you knew, you would let min yoongi hurt you again anyways.

“Fuck.” Yoongi curses as he makes his way back into the building and walking into his studio. By the time he opens the door, he sees that the girl is gone, just like you. He decides to open the bag of food you got him, refusing to let your hard work go to waste. Even if he did lose you.

Your note is like a warning sign for him. But he reads it. And his heart crumbles in pain. Suddenly, the thought of eating food didn’t seem appealing anymore. He falls back onto the couch crumpling the piece of paper in his hands. And for the first time in a long time, he cries.

He lets out harsh sobs as he blindly reaches for his cellphone. He reads the texts you sent him and his grip tightens.

He wants to call you, and tell you it was a misunderstanding. He wants you back. That he needs you and loves you.

But one of his downfalls is confrontation. So he doesn’t. He leaves you alone. Leaving him to swallow his pain by working on his new track and drinking liquors til he passes out.

He doesn’t remember how long he’s been in the studio. But his body can feel it. So when somebody opens the door, he winces at the intrusion of light.

“oppa! You need to leave the studio, it reeks. Gah! Did something die in here?”

He merely turns to face another of the producers. She’s scrunching her nose at the sight of him.

He turns back to his computer, adding a few touches here and there. He hears her sigh and the door closes.

Within minutes, she comes back with namjoon, seokjin and a bottle of febreze. He gives her a confused look as Namjoon and Seokjin practically manhandle him out of the studio.

“Oh my Lord this is fucking nasty, get him out.” She says with a pained look as she sprays the whole studio.

“Hey! My equipment! I haven’t finished the track! Let me back-“ he yells as she slams the door in his face.

It’s quiet. He knows what he looks like. A pathetic mess.

“Yoongi-ssi.” Seokjin calls him, but he doesn’t meet the elder’s gaze.

“Hyung, what happened? You never work yourself this hard. You should go home.” Namjoon softly suggests as he shakes his head.

“Home? The studio is my home. Not like I can go back to the dorms.”

“What do you mean the studio is your home? What about y/n?” Seokjin inquires and at the sound of your name, he loses it.

“I cannot go back to her. I lost her hyung, don’t you get it? She fucking hates me because I broke her heart.”

“What exactly did you do wrong?” Seokjin softly asks as yoongi felt his heart constrict.

“She brought me food a few days ago. I was working on the new track. I fell asleep on the couch.”

“She got mad at you because you were sleeping?” Namjoon says confused meeting seokjin’s look.

“Yeah, she found me sleeping on the couch… with another girl.”

There was a dead silence in the room, but all Yoongi could hear was his own heart beat pounding.

“Who is the girl, Min Yoongi?” Seokjin has a subtle glint of anger in his voice as he muttered

“intern. She was bringing me coffee and we were talking about stuff and she told me to take a break. So I lied on the couch but in my sleepy mode I pulled her onto me.”

“Well she’s fired.” Namjoon sighs to himself, rolling his shoulders back to alleviate the back pain.

“She shouldn’t be engaging in things like that with coworkers let alone idols. But the question is; why did you let her?”

Maybe because I was missing you. So I could take love from anyone who offered. So why couldn’t I take it from you?

“I-i don’t know. But I have to fix it.”

“She just slept on top you, right? You didn’t sleep with her… right?”

Namjoon looks afraid to ask, probably because he was the closest friend you had in bight aside from the maknae line.

“I didn’t… but I almost.” Yoongi whispers as he hear seokjin mutter curses under his breath.

“Well I don’t know what to tell you Min Yoongi. You lost the best thing in your life because of your carelessness. Your inability to accept people into your life. So why are you upset when you keep pushing her away? You need to set fucking boundaries when entering and being in a relationship. So you either chuck your pride and make it up to Y/N or you fuck off and leave her alone. Either way you still need to apologize to her.”

Yoongi bites his inner cheek as he processes the information. He had to apologize to you, but how? Surely it’s too late, a week has already passed.

Namjoon softly nudges yoongi which shakes him out of his reverie.

“It’s better late than never, hyung. Go to her.”

For the first time in a long time, yoongi left the studio and left the building.

It’s been a week since you’ve seen Yoongi. You just assumed that things were over, since he hasn’t made an effort to contact you. His silence and lack of response just shows you that she means a lot to him.

You sigh looking at the empty tub of coffee flavoured ice-cream. Maybe you’ve sulked for a bit now, but it’s time to stop. There were things to be done, eventually.

There’s a knock on your door. You furrow your brows in confusion. You weren’t expecting anyone, did you order something online?

You open the door without looking at who it was. It was yoongi, drenched, looking like he came back from the dead a week later.

“Yoongi? What are you doing here?” You say with arms crossed. You could let him inside, but part of you wants him to suffer. Also, if you were to let him inside, you would be vulnerable. And knowing your emotional state, you wouldn’t be rational and probably just take him back without batting an eye.

“I’m so fucking late and I’m sorry. I- I just need to talk to you, please Y/N. I-“

fine. I should probably let him in before Mrs. Kim 5 doors down starts to become nosy.

“Whatever, just don’t make the floor too wet.” You say opening the door wider, watching him carefully place his shoes and hanging his coat.

He follows you to the bedroom and you give him a towel to dry up in the bathroom. While he does that, you pull a pair of his clothes that he left behind and give it to him. He smiles back in gratitude but it turns out to be a grimace.

You go to the kitchen to make some tea. As you’re pouring the tea in the two mugs, you spot yoongi walk out with bare fare and a towel on his shoulders. Your heart beats at the sight of him, so maybe you’re not healing as fast as you wanted.

He sits at the chairs you’ve planted near the countertop. You both quietly drink, allowing the background noise of rain to fill the room.

After a while, he speaks.

“I don’t know how many times I will apologize to express myself, but I know none of them will make things better. You might not even forgive me, and that’s something I have to live with.”

You decide to look at anywhere but him. Maybe if you saw the emotion in his eyes, it would become more surreal.

“- but I can’t ask to be back in your life regardless if I don’t give you an explanation. And I know I don’t deserve to be in your life after this. Not as a boyfriend or even a friend.

But basically i was distancing myself from you, because I was stressed, I didn’t want it to affect our relationship but-“

He lets out a bitter laugh, looking into his cup.

“-Turns out I did more than that, didn’t I? And what you saw was basically this intern I’ve been teaching her the ropes at bight. She told me to take a break, since I was working for too long. So when I lied on the couch, I reached out for her hand and she fell on top of me.

I don’t know why I did that. Maybe because she reminded me of you. That I enjoyed someone taking care of me no matter who it was. But that was it, I didn’t sleep with her. But, I mean I could have. I don’t know what I was thinking.

But I understand why that would make you feel betrayed. I’m so sorry Y/N… I pushed you away when you were trying to just offer me your heart.”

“Yoongi.” You call out as he wipes his tears with the back of his hand.

“You really broke my heart. Not just seeing you with her but the fact that you went to anyone but me.”

“But I’m here! I’m saying sorry and that I still love you. Why don’t you understand?”

“What do you mean I don’t understand? I did more than understand, I never bothered or smothered you. I gave you space. I allowed you to be by yourself and a space to talk things through. If anything, you don’t understand. You don’t value our relationship or me, min yoongi. Who goes to say later you won’t do something worse?”

Yoongi looks helpless, but you avert your gaze. You walk to put your glass in the sink. And when you turn around, he’s on the floor. Kneeling at your feet. On reflex, you bend down to his level offering a hand.

“You don’t need to kneel, yoongi. Save yourself the embarrassment. Get up.”

He shook his head, frame trembling with each word he spoke. “I can’t lose you, i refuse to let you go. I know you won’t forgive me, because of all the shit i’ve done but please don’t leave me. I can’t, you can’t make me please.” 

You stare at his pathetic frame for a while, memorizing his features. sure, he didn’t sleep with her. but not to say it wasn’t his fault. who am i to be angry with her when he pulled her on top? but do all people deserve second chances? won’t i be regarded as weak and naive?

“I can’t make you leave. I can’t make you stop loving me. But I can protect my heart, which is something you failed to do. I’m sorry, Min Yoongi. I would say to give me time, but i don’t know how long that will be. And you’re a busy man, with a life filled with success you won’t have time for me.” 

Yoongi looks at you with bloodshot eyes and nods. He turns to leave as you follow him to the door shakily. Before he steps outside, he turns to face you. His lip starts to quiver, and your heart breaks. 

“can i ask a favour from you? just one more time?” he meekly asks as you nod. 

he slowly reaches for your arms, and you let him touch you. you want to feel his embrace, but it feels different this time. and when he gets closer, you close the gap. a farewell kiss.

and ever since that shared moment, you don’t see min yoongi ever again. 

[clearskiiess]

I actually have the best idea for your "talk about" ask meme. Do 1-40 please 💕💗💞💟❤️💖 Give Us Your Autobiography

1  - talk about the first time you watched your favorite movie.

already answered !

2 - talk about your first kiss.

damn well that aint happened yet. lol

3 - talk about the person you’ve had the most intense romantic feelings for.

hGGGG probably my best friend and crush miriam. god im fucking in love with her omfg gO DODKLHFSHFDJDKHK i wont ramble too much but omffhjfkfjkdhfkjd thnak god shes not on tumblr or id die eeeehggGGGH like we flirt a lot but we’re not dating quite yetaaa ghddgh

4 - talk about the thing you regret most so far.

nothing bitchesssss 😎🤘 i regret not getting into good music earlier maybe.

5 - talk about the best birthday you’ve had.

already answered!

6 - talk about the worst birthday you’ve had.

uhhhghghgh not really a bad one i can remember ! all of them have been good, some better than others ofc but theyre still good even if i dont get prezzies.

7 - talk about your biggest insecurity.

ohufuibfhkbkjbjk probably my art and drumming and writing opps.

8 - talk about the thing you are most proud of.

already answered !

9 - talk about little things on your body that you like the most.

already answered!

10 -  talk about the biggest fight you’ve ever had.

damn probably me and my mum, we fight kind of often but yeah djldfkjjkdjkdkj those are probably the worst fights i have. or me and my dad

11 - talk about the best dream you’ve ever had.

already answered!

12 - talk about the worst dream you’ve ever had.

damn uh kinda dont wanna answer, too personal sorry eee

13 - talk about the first time you had sex/how you imagine your first time.

idk really, just being with someone i really like or even love and its just super fun and casual, and like just exploring it? yeah

14 - talk about a vacation.

ooo when me n the fam went to europe when i was 10 and we went to paris for 4 days, then germany for 2 weeks and norway i think 1 or 2 weeks? it was bloody awesome omfG it was great !!!! my family is big on travel so we usually use our money on it.

15 - talk about the time you were most content in life.

already answered !

16 - talk about the best party you’ve ever been to.

eh not really? maybe friend’s parties as a child but thats kinda it. dont really go to parties yet eee

17 - talk about someone you want to be friends with.

already answered !

18 - talk about something that happened in elementary school.

uh thats primary right? well, nothing interesting i remember in year 6 i loved warrior cats and me n my friends would roleplay it a lot at school, everyone thot we were weird but i didnt care ahah.

19 - talk about something that happened in middle school.

well thats high school for me so, nothing interesting either. maybe that one time with my old friend domi and maya and it was yr 7, i was 13 i was staying home cause i was sick af. and maya called me up, obviously trying not to laugh. and she was like “domis broken his leg! help help! what do i do” and im like uh. why are you calling me??? call the ambulance or get a teacher to do it for christs sake! i dont even believe you. and she was like yeah look! and sent me a fucking photoshopped pic of him lying at the bottom of the stairs, it made me fucking laugh so hard i was like, bro you expect me to believe you? ok buddy. bye. and hung up it was funny af

20 - talk about something that happened in high school.

^^^ answered above lol.

21 - talk about a time you had to turn someone down.

ggghHHHH ok i had to turn down my friend austin in yr 7  bc domi was pressuring me to go out with him cause i told him about how i used to like him, but for some reason that meant i still liked him to him??? so he kept going on abt it saying ask him out etc so i caved in and did and the date was so shitty i just faked sick and left and we didnt talk for a bit, but thats long gone and we’ve made up now lol, just good friends

22 - talk about your worst fear.

already answered ! 

23 - talk about a time someone turned you down.

hgg not happened yet,,, thank god 

24 - talk about something someone told you that meant a lot.

well whenever someone compliments me on anything really or says im their best friend like??? psjksfjkdjkhfsdjlfds ok dead,,, or when they say i love u i jusT DIE

25 - talk about an ex-best friend.

already answered!

26 - talk about things you do when you’re sick.

already answered !

27 - talk about your favorite part of someone else’s body.

uh??? idk hands. i love hands a lot. and collarbones. and lips. and eyes. and eyebrows. and legs, and tummies and - ok ill shuT Up

28 - talk about your fetishes.

dont really have any. maybe hands

29 - talk about what turns you on.

hands. teehee

30 - talk about what turns you off.

i dunno,  any bdsm like at all ahahaha. srry bros

31 - talk about what you think death is like.

i dunno really? sometimes i feel like its nothing, like we’ll just die and stop functioning and just rot and become one with the earth. but sometimes i feel like maybe there is an afterlife, like not what we think but yea? like i dunno.

32 - talk about a place you remember from your childhood.

ohh boy , well one is this river near my house, or creek really. i love it a lot its great, i love going there and watching the birds and hearing the water rush.

33 - talk about what you do when you are sad.

eh, kinda just cry my eyes out and listen to music or watch a good movie and then i feel a bit better.

34 - talk about the worst physical pain you’ve endured.

uh well as of recently i can remember, was when i got jaw surgery in april this year. now this shit was fucking horrible, for a month and a half my face was puffed like a balloon and bruises everywhere, and i literally could not eat cause i couldnt bloody move my mouth! i was confined to my bed and i lost so much weight bc i could barely eat and i was throwing up old blood and shit during that time and i couldnt fucking sit up without drooling cause i couldnt control it it was so fucking gross man. at least i look better now but it was hell lmfao.

35 - talk about things you wish you could stop doing.

uhhh idk maybe staying up all night n shit, i dont think anything else? maybe avoiding school too. oh , and ofc get rid of my depression hahah

36 - talk about your guilty pleasures.

eeeeeee nothing rlly? i dont feel guilty abt shit, i shouldnt

37 - talk about someone you thought you were in love with.

uhm i guess my ex bf tyler, well gf at the time but yea, i loved him a whole lot dkjfdhdhfhkdj but we were only 12-13 yknow and he lived in the us so it was rlly sucky. but it was a good time, just some experience

38 - talk about songs that remind you of certain people.

damn well, sweet child o mine by gnr reminds me of my friend claudia, she LOVES stuff like gnr and ac/dc, motley crue etc. and for u maxie, killer queen def ! and gold dust woman for me friend mazzy,,,, and in my life omg for miriam sjdjdjdjfkg

39 - talk about things you wish you’d known earlier.

already answered !

40 - talk about the end of something in your life.

already answered !

tYSM BBY MAXIE ILYSM

[propshophannah]

Hi, so I’m not super sure what I’m trying to say but I’m feeling down abt some manorian posts I saw. It’s prob really dumb but I get like upset/sad when blogs I like a lot love everything SJM but then say they’re anti one of her ships. I’ve criticized SJM’s writing & there r ships I don’t particularly like...but I’d never say I was anti one of her ships? Idk. Maybe I’m just confused/sad abt why ppl who love SJM choose that word when it carries a lot of baggage in fandoms. idk. I was just 1/2

feeling kinda sad about it. I also saw ppl I respect a lot saying manorian isn’t a ship cuz they don’t say I love you/show PDA/only have sex. I was just…really hurt by that? It felt like they were saying ppl had to act a certain way for their feelings or relationships to be valid. I don’t think they meant to be offensive(?) they just didn’t realize they were marginalizing a lot of ppl & cultures that show affection differently. idk. It made me really sad & I’m not sure what to do. 2/2

—

Hi Nonnie, I’m sorry it took me so long to get to this ask and I’m sorry you’re feeling sad and confused. I want you to know that what you’ve brought up here is not dumb. Your feelings are valid and important! I’ll try to address your ask as best I can.

About fandom use of the term anti.

You are not alone in finding this odd or discouraging. I’ve seen stuff like this from time to time on “pro” blogs and found myself thinking the same exact thing. I’ve had a lot of conversations with people about it, too. It does seem like there could be a better way to phrase ship criticism or dislike of something other than to use the word anti because you’re right, it does carry a lot of baggage.

To play the devil’s advocate, I think it’s really important to remember that context is key. Just because a fandom blog you love says they’re “anti” something doesn’t mean they’re using the term in the same way Official Anti Blogs use it. (As I write this, I’m wondering if I’ve ever used it to express dislike, not realizing how it could come across!) It could be a joke you’re not in on, or phrasing used because the blogger was rage posting (we’ve all been there) and that was the phrase that validated their feelings in that moment, or it could be that they used that phrase without thinking about how it might come off to their followers.

Have you tried asking the blogger about it? Maybe just send a quick note about how it made you feel. They might not realize how it comes off. This could give you an opportunity to feel as though you’ve been heard and it would allow the blogger the opportunity to explain why they chose that phrase. I think you should ask them, Nonnie! Just because there are a lot of reasons someone might choose that phrase that don’t necessarily mean they are against SJM, or only pro the things they like about her writing and against everything else.

Now that’s not to say that a blog can’t be pro SJM and still be anti something about her books or (as you said) criticize her work. And if that’s the phrase they choose to use then there isn’t much we can do about it. We can’t change other people, but we can change ourselves. So maybe, you don’t follow that blog anymore, or you remind yourself that they’re still a great blog, but one you disagree with on word choice and topics.

About PDA and relationship validation.

I actually love that you brought this up because this is a conversation I’ve been having a LOT lately. There have been a handful of posts or comments on posts lately where things like PDA etc. were used to lessen or invalidate Manon and Dorian’s relationship and it just left an icky feeling with a lot of people.

I should be VERY clear here. I DO NOT think the people who use PDA as an argument for invalidating a ship realize they’re marginalizing people, or are being offensive when they do this. I think it’s more that they’ve just never been in a position where they were asked to think about it that way. The normative category is by definition ignorant of itself, right? Like, even I had a hard time figuring out why some of these arguments left a bad taste in my mouth, and it wasn’t until after I’d talked to a few people that I was able to really figure it out.

But you’re right! Not everyone expresses affection by exhibiting normative displays of romantic love (such as hand holding, cuddling, kissing etc.). Some people aren’t capable of those things, don’t like those things, or they just choose to express affection differently (maybe by validating someone’s feelings, keeping them safe, being present, providing for them in small ways like making dinner or folding their person’s laundry etc.).

And I think the best/most relevant point you make, is that some people don’t come from cultures that normalize PDA. Western cultures show affection VERY differently than Eastern cultures.

Recently I watched a CNN special on Japan that talked a lot about this idea of “sexlessness” and how culturally the Japanese don’t show a lot of affection, specifically touch affection (hugs, kisses, hand holding after marriage etc.). It was fascinating and I’d argue that the idea of cultural differences TOTALLY APPLIES to the Ironteeth in ToG. We don’t know a lot about their culture, but we do know that affection in any form is frowned upon and discouraged. So if we consider how Manon grew up thinking she was incapable of love/displaying loving or kind emotions (and subsequently beaten/abused for displayed them) it’s not hard at all to see how it would take her a lot of time (and deprogramming) to be able to show and express those kinds of emotions.

This is her ENTIRE character arc, right? From the very moment she appeared on page, she told us how heartless she was, while simultaneously showing us how heartless she was not. (I mean, helloOoOo Abraxos!) Her first “I love you” always belonged to him. But she didn’t need to say it for us to know she loved him. It was there the whole time in her actions. Same with the Thirteen. Manon loved them dearly. They were her sisters, her family. And just because she never told them “I love you” doesn’t mean she didn’t love them. I have plenty of friends whom I love very deeply who I’ve never said I love you to. I likewise have lots of friends who I have said it to. Also, it’s easier to tell a pet/animal that we love them rather than risk saying it to a person, right? Animals aren’t going to judge or reject you—or even verbally respond. Therefore, it’s a low risk endeavor. (Not to say I think this is the only reason she said it to Abraxos!)

My partner and I are not into PDA. At all. Sometimes, if we’re in a group of close friends or family I may be more into showing touch affection, but usually we save those moments for private. There have been MANY times when we’ve been out and people have hit on my partner because they honestly don’t know we’re together. And I don’t get mad/jealous or physically stake a claim or anything when this happens. I let my partner handle it. We just aren’t into sharing our intimate moments with other people. It’s for us only.

So I totally understand how an argument based on PDA can be really hurtful or potentially offensive. Especially when the argument ignores the great moments of communication we get with manorian. As if communication is less important to relationships than PDA…

I also see nothing wrong with casual sex, though I don’t see manorian as having had casual sex (even before the “stay” scene where they clearly did more than just sex). I think they both talk a big game about how the sex didn’t mean anything, but if that were true then why wouldn’t Dorian pursue Vesta? Why would the idea of Dorian with another person make Manon jealous? I feel like they both wanted to pretend like The Sex didn’t mean anything, but I read two people, who weren’t able to verbalize their feelings for one another, finding a shared safe space that was free of responsibilities and the horrors of war where they could be with one another and express their feelings the only way they could at that moment in time. (Which is another reason the “stay” scene stands out.)

TL;DR

A good friend of mine is not monogamous at all. She’s in a relationship with a married man (who’s in an open relationship with his wife). They’re bf and gf and she tells me how they say I love you to one another, take trips together, have AMAZING sex, he writes her the most beautiful love letters, they go on dates—they do EVERYTHING couples do. Except he’s married and they’re both sleeping with other people.

And sometimes it’s HARD for me to figure out where to put this in my brain because I grew up with a specific set of parameters that defined what a relationship was supposed to look like. Sometimes I get confused about how he also loves his wife, sometimes I get confused about how my friend knows their relationship is real. Like it’s hard because it challenges societal expectations of what relationships look like.

I think that happens sometimes with ships in books—or with anything in life that we don’t understand. When something is different than what we expect or are used to, it can kind of…blind us to what’s there. If it still bothers you, Nonnie, you could try explaining your side to these people and start a dialogue? It might actually be really helpful for you and them! Give it a try and let me know!

[trashayfanfiction]

BF: Sickness AshxEiji

Inspired by https://ash-callenreese.tumblr.com/post/178988394079/a-very-important-and-painful-thread

No good end, Trigger warning, Sickness. HIV

....................................

Ash knew he needed to be tested; none of the weight he lost during his time with Golzine had came back. He was still losing weight, albeit slower than before.

For the first time in his life he was scared of knowing.

He had made it to Japan. He was letting himself have the life with Eiji; letting himself have what he wanted. They had an apartment. He was learning Japanese. The nightmares were getting better.

He had caught things before, but Dr. Meredith treated them. Golzine also kept him ‘clean’……

He was in Japan. They knew they were in love, but their first kiss still eluded them. How much longer could they wait? The desire was there. Ash knew he was the reason they were waiting. Actually doing it with someone he loved……. Because he loved someone……. Would be overwhelming.

Eiji was letting him take it slow, waiting for him to make the first move.

…….He didn’t know if this was even on the other’s mind…… The brunette knew Ash wasn’t invincible…… but this would be a pathetic way to go……

He needed to know. Eiji slept in the same bed.

He’d researched it. They had testing for it now….. but he could use all of Golzine’s money to treat it and he would still never get better…….

He needed to know. He needed to make sure he couldn’t pass it to his friend……

He went to the clinic alone.

Waiting for the results were nerve-wracking.

………………………………………………………..

He received the results……..

………………he didn’t know what he expected. He was a whore after all.

“DON’T TOUCH ME,” Ash whirled, body rigid, scared. Eiji had seen him like that before, but it was mainly used towards men….. never him. “I don’t want you getting sick too……I’m already enough of a death sentence,” He clutched the papers in his hand. He knew he was being emotional, irrational, but….. He’d just told Eiji. Obviously the other’s response was to hug him. Didn’t that idiot know? Touching him would kill him.

               The space of their small kitchen was between them.

He would be dead within a year, three years maximum. It was advancing. He should have just died. He knew he wasn’t going to get a good end. Why try?

“I don’t care. I love you. I am willing to be with you.” Always so kind…..

“Well you shouldn’t,” ….And he always bit back….

“We have been over this many times. You know my answer,” Calm in the face of danger….. open, caring…. that’s why he loved this man……

“We NEED to stay just friends. I… Never before in my life have I been in love like I’m in love with you. I wish this wasn’t-!,”

“How do I love you? It doesn’t need to be physical. Can I kiss you without getting sick? I am fine with never kissing you.”

“I- I think you can kiss me….. I don’t know. I’m researching it. Nobody seems to know what it is, but it’s not cancer,” Ash swallowed his nerves, “It seems to be transferred by body fluids; blood and semen and such….. I don’t know if spit counts. We need to wait. I’m trying to find out…… no organization with money is researching it and there’s just so much fake information….. They say it’s a moral disease,”

“You did not have a choice,” Eiji stopped that line of thought, “You are not bad for having it.” He didn’t want to admit that he was just as scared. He knew it was a death sentence.

Ash choked, “I’m going to get sick, very sick. I am going to die, and there’s nothing I can do about it. I don’t want to leave you alone,” He was trembling, “I’ve never been afraid of death before, …….but now I’m with you…… and I don’t want to leave you. I don’t want you to get sick. We just dodged the bullet. We were home free. I knew……  I should have known……….I’m sorry you had to be involved,”

He collapsed heavily into the living room chair, burying his face in his hand. Eiji wanted to hold him. Any form of comfort…… but he couldn’t take it right now. Ash was bitter. …..To be touched…… He would never know what it was like to be in love and be touched….. in that way. The option was gone.

Now it would be a death for whoever touched him. He laughed darkly. If only this had happened sooner….

He hadn’t wanted it right away, he definitely had baggage he needed to deal with before anything went too far….. He desperately wanted it to be okay, but now it would never be.

“I don’t want you dying from such a disgusting thing,” Ash laughed, “Let’s hope at least some of those bastards caught it from me. Too bad I didn’t get it earlier,”

Eiji didn’t know whether to encourage that. Yes laughing, but it was self-hatred. He didn’t want Ash to feel disgusted with himself.

He prodded gently, “If you had died sooner, I would have never met you,”

“Good.” Ash snapped back.

Eiji debated forcing him into a hug. He was physically stronger than the other even before the disease. He decided against it. …..It would make Ash feel weak.

“You make me angry when you talk like that. You would not be here in Japan with me, and my family,” He knelt in front of his friend, love, life partner…. Soulmate. “There are people who love you even when you do not love yourself,”

He brushed Ash’s hair out of his face, “I am not expecting anything in return. I am not expecting sex, I only want if you do as well,” He knelt to meet Ash’s eyes, “I am in love with your soul. I want to stay if you will let me,”

               Ash wanted to throw the papers and tell Eiji his soul was garbage, but that wasn’t an argument he would win.

“The doctors say it’s starting to set in….. The drugs will only prolong it,” Ash’s voice wavered.

Eiji, as always, was strong and caught him, “I am happy for any time I have with you,”

Ash held the other to him and cried.

………………………………………………………………………..

-END-

...........................

Might make a short series about them dealing with it in everyday life..... idk. I have other things i wanted to make, but then i made this....

[bloojayoolie]

Being Alone, Another One, and Ass: al Having a bf is kinda like having a kid. "When was the last time vou showered?""You've been on ur game for 7 hours". Needs his clothes laid out, have to go clothes shopping bc they won't. Can't trust them to pack their bag for a trip Face it, you can't do life alone boys. 7/29/18, 05:32 from он 12.8K Retweets 48.8K Likes Shout out to all my straight sisters I'm so sorry Jesus, leave his ass We learn fast to be very kind and attentive, tho My mom, who got her degree in Marriage and Family Counseling when she was 60, says studies show that women will sometimes sometimes leave a long term relationship to live on their own for a while before seeking a new relationship, but men will almost never leave a long term relationship without having a new relationship either in progress or just beginning. They don't want to give up the caretaker they have without another one on deck or in the wings This is so sad This isnt cute or quirky. This means hes a fucking hopeless user Please date a man who actually acts like an adult. Ok I lived with my ex for 2 years and he literally wouldn't be able to get his own food if I wasn't at home, I'd get home from work and he'd be angry at me for "making him starve" My current partner has lived on his own for 8 years and the absolute most I have to help him with is maybe sending him $20 so he can make a bill payment on time It made me realise for 2-4 years I wasn't a girlfriend I was a fucking mother Men who have been independent are capable of reverting if given the slightest excuse. When we married, my ex husband was 10 years older than me and had lived on his own for 8ish years. Yet (and I allowed this until finally got fed up and took us to counseling) I did 80% of the cooking, because I was better at it. Same with the cleaning, shopping, social planning, etc After I left, in the first six months I got texts or calls asking me to please tell him The online banking password (dude, I left you, you should really change that) Where l ordered his special-wecial organic underwear Where the good cutting board was (my dad gave it to us at our wedding, genius, I took it with me along with the rest of the stuff from my famil What brand butter we bought What brand of local kielbasa we bought . Who his doctor was What RMV office had the shortest lines Where the old tax returns were (in the fucking box labeled tax returns) The phone number for his best friend I shit you not. Then he had a heart attack (mild) and none of his family or friends were around to take him to the hospital. But instead of calling 911, he called me, who by then lived 45 minutes away. He lived 5 minutes from an EMS dispatch location. He called me, despite the fact that he didn't believe me 8 months prior when I was feeling suicidal and I had to call a cab to go alone to check myself into the hospital for a 72-hour hold. I told him to call 911, hung up on him when he whined about "making a fuss", called 911, called his siblings and then texted them "your brother is having a heart attack, I called 911 for him, come home," and washed my hands of it. Emotionally vacant men who won't do household labor or emotional labor are not Nazis, but they aren't good people, either, and you don't have to put up with their shit. Millennial women of Tumblr, please read this post. And then please: make the decision for yourself to never stay with a man who expects you to be his mother and servant. Straight women are doomed because of straight men that refuse to take care of themselves. We need to stop babying grown men Let me tell y'all a story These behaviors? They match my mother's behavior My mother hasn't paid a bill in the last 19 years of her life. My father always did them because she couldn't remember to pay her credit card bill at the end of the month. My father, in trying to clean up her stuff because shes a horder, was yelled at for touching her things, but she refused to clean herself. She laid in bed all day while my father fed and took care of us. My mother even once said that she doesn't see my father as a partner, she sees him as a superior When she kicked my father out of the house, my mother refused to go out shopping for grocreys, she rathered go out to the mall with her friends while the kids where home eating quesadillas because we literally only had cheese, tortillas, and rotting veggies in the fridge. That weekend my dad took us grocrey shopping, she was furious for undermining her She refused to work, refused to pay the bills, she refused to clean up her shit, and was seemingly incapable of taking care of the children. I was once so sick I was unable to fucking walk, and she didn't believe me and made me take care of my sister while she went drinking And now that my parents are divorced, she found another man to do all this shit so she doesn't have to be responsible. There's another man raising her daughter because she doesn't want to leave her bed This isn't a "straight women" issue. Painting it as one can seriously harm people and their views on their own relationships. Everyone should be wary of people who cant function independently dammit. THANK YOU And all l'm seeing are victims of parental emotional abuse who were deliberately not taught independence as a form of making them dependent on the abuser and lack of communication with their spouses Also the fact men try to move onto a new partner could be idk because theyre fucking lonely you idiots This whole post is just people who had bad experiences trying to act like the whole world is as bad as they think it is Source: 191,774 notes Jan 22nd, 2019 This whole post is just people who had bad experiences trying to act like the whole world is as bad as they think it is.

[archived--hell]

1, 2, 17, honestly all of them if you’re up to it

1 - already answered 

2. Do you have a personal favourite among your OCs?

L O R D T jupiter fuck man got damn id die for jupiter 

3. Have you ever adopted a character or gotten a character from someone else?

i have adopted characters before, but ive never done anything with them, and i have received characters Back from people but besides that nah

4. A character you rarely talk about?

HI PLEASE I BEG OF YOU ASK ABOUT THE GODS PLE AS E IM DYING

5. If you could make only one of your OCs popular/known, who would it be?

fuck uh.. honestly if its only semi popular would i do this bc being Well Known would be nice, yeah, but.. it scares me? idk but uh probably leo or aero, theyre two boys i hold close to my heart

6. Two OCs of yours that look alike despite not being related?

:) eldur and leo kinda? idk i try not to make any of them look alike rip

7. Are your OCs part of any story or stories?

YES! theyre actually all part of one universe called cooking with demons! i have a whole game planned out for the man cast kinda? but all in all its all set within one universe, with multiple different stories occurring within it jhfdksg

8 - already answered

9. Would you ever be willing to give any of your OCs to someone else?

unless specfifically made for them upon request, no. ive already tried that once and it lead to me losing any and all control i had over my characters. At this moment, i only “share” a few ocs with my boyfriend @coffee-burglar and even then, its taken almost a year to even be able to do that

10. Introduce an OC with a complicated design?

uh, all of them are kinda complicated for me, but as of right now, that would go to leos full form. (if u want a ref hmu and ill post it, but it wont be my art)

11. Is there any OC of yours you could describe as a “sunshine”?

like a ray of sunshine? yeah! angel and stitch would fit perfectly for that!

12. Name an OC that isn’t yours but who you like a lot

@coffee-burglar their oc chrome n koh,  or derek but thats bc im a hoe

13. Do you have any troublemaker OCs?

aero, jhor, innis, leo are all trouble makers to some degree, leo being the most trouble some

14. Introduce an OC with a tragic backstory

uhhhh fuck what counts as tragic?

i guess id have to say leo or jupiter mostly, but eldur fits too

15. Do you like to talk about your OCs with other people?

if youd let me i would yell about these fucks for hours on end, ive done it

16. Which one of your OCs would be the best at biology (school subject)?

the best but wouldnt enjoy it: Jupiterthe best and would absolutely enjoy it: colby

17. Any OC OTPs?

stitch/lavaaero/kohcolby/derek/inniswill/happiness aeyr/Eberictderek/Xhaztolleo/eldur

18. Any OC crackships?

jhfkdfsjghdfkjhgdkfjsgl i never talk abt it but will/aero is fucking A+

19. Introduce an OC that means a lot to you (and explain why)

ah,, leo. i originally made him to project the worst in myself onto, and because of that ive made his life a living shit hole. but,, recently ive been hell bent on giving him a good ending, one where he heals, and lives his life ok, where he finally, finally has a chance to be happy and get help. its,, kind of been a tiny growing point for me? he just, means a lot to me because of that haha

20. Do any of your OCs sing? If they sing, care to share more details (headcanon voice, what kind of songs they like etc)?

uhhh all of their voice claims are songs n such but only a few of them actually sing in canon! heres the voice claims of the ones who do sing:

Aero - thats his voice, but hed probably more likely to sing Something Like ThisAngelStitch - this is her voice! but shed be much more likely to sing something a lot more upbeat, kind of like thisColby (its jeremy from bmc jghfdkg)

and one i dont have a voice claim for yet that does sing canonically is Sycamore! 

21. Your most artistic OC

!!!! oh thatd easily be will! hes nothing professional at all, but he does enjoy drawing and making diy type projects :0c hazels also artistic but with food :0c but what would you expect from a kitchen witch

22. Is there any OC of yours people tend to mischaracterize? If yes, how?

Hi My Names Skinny Penis And No One Has Ever Even Looked At My Ocs For More Than Two Seconds

23. Introduce OC that has changed from your first idea concerning what the character would be like?

lordt all of them would fit that, but the one thats changed the most? lordy thatd probably be will! he used to be a persona that was mostly only interested in dying and getting fucked, but now hes? evolved into a fully fledged character, and has even changed from being human lmao

24. If you could meet one OC of yours, who would it be and why?

jupiter, simply because he is The Biggest Comfort i have. hes,,, really important to me and i love him a lot

25. The OC that resembles you the most (same hobby, height, shared like/dislike for something etc?)

:) its bold of you to assume they dont all resemble me in some way. the most though? damian. lazy motherfucker with 200 emotional issues and no motivation to fix any of them

26. Have you ever had to change your OC’s design or something else about them against your will?

…yeah.

27. Any OCs that were inspired by a certain song?

Nope, most tend to be born from ideas spawned by me n my bf concepting about my ocs, and what would happen if this thing happened? yknow?

28. Your most dangerous OC?

He has yet to be revealed >:)c his names icarus

29. Which one of your OCs would go investigate an abandoned house at night without telling anyone they’re going?

INNIS, GOD INNIS WOULD AND HED PROBABLY DIE

30. Which one of your OCs would most likely have a secret stuffed animal collection?

secret: damiannot so secret: colby

31. Pick one OC of yours and explain what their tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really)

uHHhhHh 

damian would probably have a very shitty coded blog theme (or default) and would genuinely only reblog shitty, abstract memes, and nice food recipes for hazel to make him

32. Which one of your OCs would be the most suitable horror game protagonist and why?

protagonist? if youre going for the scared baby, colby. if ur going for the stoic “thats weird but ok” one, innis or aero.antagonist tho???? Leo and angelica :)

33. Your shyest OC?

uh, a oc thats genuinely shy and not just anxiety filled? angel :0c shes had a very limited interaction pool with anything thats not other angels so she tends to shy away from others bc she really, really doesnt want to get into awkward situations

34. Do you have any twin characters?

Jupiter and leo!

35. Any sibling characters?

Jupiter, leo, angelica, damian, eldur

jupiter, leo, damian, and angelica are all related via their dad, while eldur is related to damian via their mom

36. Do you have OC pairs where the other part belongs to someone else (siblings, lovers, friends etc)?

uhh if im understanding this question right yeah i do! derek, koh, n a lot of others belong to @coffee-burglar ! ive just roped them into my universe dkjfhkdjgh

37. Introduce an OC who is not quite human

Op All Of My Characters Are Inhuman

38. Which one of your OCs would be the best dancer?

surprisingly? aero! hes got really good rhythm and can actually dance really well, its kinda scary

39. Introduce any character you want

:)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Ill let yall have a choice, pick one

1.) Lust2.) Greed

40. Any fond memories linked to your characters? Feel free to share!

fond?? uh,, not really. but damian does have a very important memory attached to him.

tw for suicide ment hjgkdfs

with damian, i created him after i tried to kill myself and was stuck in a mental hospital. i had just finished reaing the first shadowhunters book, and decided to try and draw the first demon(???? was that what he was?? im a dumbass and its been over 2 years) you met, which had bright blue hair and if i remember correctly, electric green eyes? but yeah. i made him to cope with all the mental stress i had while being forced to be in that hospital, and hes become very close to my heart because of that

41. Has anyone drawn fanart of your OCs? If yes, maybe show a picture or two here (remember sources & permissions!)

!!!!!!!!! yeah!!! my boyfriends drawn damian and most of my characters bgjkfdhgkfdsgl but one i do hold close to my heart (bc at the time, i barely knew them) was when @stuck-in-the-ghost-zone drew aeyr! it made me really happy tbh. i still have it saved to my phone actually!!!

42. Which one of your OCs would be the most interested in Greek gods?

uhhhh,,, provided that they found a way to get anything involving earth and their beliefs itd probably be either angel or colby. angel enjoys learning anything and everything she can, while colby enjoys hearing about the Tea™ that comes with greek shit

43. Do you have any certain type when you create your OCs? Do you tend to favour some certain traits or looks? It’s time to confess

lordt ok

i really just? enjoy making demons really, or anything that doesnt quite fit “conveniently attractive” in at least one form they have. (i also favor making guys bc im Gay)

44. Something you like about your OCs in general

how well theyre coming together, for so long, their stories have been little fractures and pieces that never fit together. Fragments. but now, theyre almost fully put together and its… wonderful to see

45. A character you no longer use?

a hi have.. one. their name was angel aura, a steven universe oc. i got rid of them because of too many.. bad things.

46. Has anyone ever told you that you treat your OCs badly?

not directly, but yes. it.. actually helped me give a lot of them a ok life, or at least a good ending

47. Has anyone ever (friendly) claimed any of your OCs as their child?

@coffee-burglar eldur, colby, will n a few others lmao

48. OC who is a perfect cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure

ELDUR GOD ELDUR PLEASE SOMEONE GIVE THIS KID BACK TO HIS MOM

49. Which one of your OCs would most likely enjoy memes

damian

50. Give me the good ol’ OC talk here. Talk about anything you want

ghjkfgkfdhgklfjhglkjdfhgslfjdgh give me a actual thing to talk about bc im dying op

[cdc1345711]

OC Story: Academy Days 1

(Chip proposed to his Girlfriend Ari before the New Year awaiting their wedding in February of 2021 and despite what everyone says Chip is Romantic and what better way to show it than to Ari's job at Mandrake University as he steps out his car and checks the Directions on his Phone)

Chip:Mandrake Academy? Yep this is the place....now the effort of finding Ari's Office......oi vey"

(He searched around asking Students while inside Ari was hanging in the lounge with her fellow educators)

Ari:(Putting Creamer in her Coffee)Another Day Another Dollar or at least that's what the Board Says"

Owlferd:(Anthropology Teacher and Owl)I agree Ari least you're shift hasn't started yet"

Ari:It did but I got no clients till after Lunch"

Wanda:(Coed Coach/Entomology Teacher Wasp)My class is about to start....damn early risers"

Ari:Just like High School"

Connie:(Cone Headed Honors Science)Except most of the Students look like they're Held back a couple of years"

(Everyone laughs)

Wanda:So......anyone going to the Headmasters Party tonight?"

Owlferd:Only downside of Tenure of I got to go hohoho it's no trouble for me it's just my Husband doesn't wear much Formal Attire"

Connie:Speaking of 'Husbands' when are we gonna meet yours Ari"

Ari:First off Not my Husband YET we're engaged Second He's very busy and isn't a Formal Fellow as well"

Wanda:That so? Or is he fake?"

Ari:Not Fake he's real"

Wanda:Sure(says sarcastically)"

Moe:(Lorologist aka Primate Guy who studies lore comes in making a dash for the Coffee)Coffee coffee coffee need it......(gets his cup)"

Wanda:You okay Beu?"

Moe:Classes about to start and I SWEAR to every Gods if someone asks me another Eldritch Question I might bash my head in.....(takes a deep breath and exhales calming down)so what I miss?"

Owlferd:We're talking about the existance of Ari's Fiance"

Moe:Seriously? What are we in Middle School?"

Ari:Thank You Moe"

Moe:It's up there with 'My Boyfriend who lives in Canada' and 'My BF is my Cat'"

Ari:Okay that last one isn't real"

Connie:Like your Fiance...."

Ari:HE'S REAL!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Owlferd:Well Ari you never showed us a picture of him......"

Wanda:Hell you Never gave us his name"

Ari:Well......its because we want our private life to be uuuh whats the word umm.....Private"

(Everyone Stares)

Ari:Alright......his name is Chip"

Moe:The Psychotic Metal Organic?"

Ari:He's more Sociopathic than Psychotic"

(Everyone looks at each other and all laugh)

Wanda:Seriously the Greatest Assassin ever is marrying you?"

Ari:Mmmmm"

(Bell Rings)

Moe:Time to Work.....we'll pick off later(phone ding)huh?(looks at it)oh shit turns out some Bearded Weirdo is on Campus"

Wanda:That......narrows it down to most of the Students here"

Moe:But he's not a student....probably just a Homeless Guy snuck in....again"

Owlferd:3rd time this week by my count"

Ari:Well if anything Security might catch him"

(Back to Chip he so far hasn't found anyone who knows where Ari's Office is until he stops to asks some Stoners)

Chip:Yo Potheads....."

Stoner 1 Grass Guy:Whoa man this is medicinal..."

Chip:Grass smoking Grass? Either Charles Coburn thinks this is original or he's REALLY bad at being funny"

Stoner 2:Whuuuut?"

Chip:Nothing anyone here knows a Miss Ari Zira? Or more importantly the location of her Office?"

Stoner 3:No"

Stoner 1:Why so you can Narc on us Fascist?"

Chip:I really don't give a shit I just.....wait those Grade A Mary Jay?"

Stoner 2:Yeah man....."

Stoner 1:We'd share but we don't share with cops...."

Chip:Not a cop just trying to find my Soon to be Wife"

Stoner 3:Likely story.....NARC!!!!!"

Chip:(Whispers as he face palms)Jesus Fucking Christ looks Shaggy Scooby and Dooby either you tell me where Your Psychologist is or I'm taking all your Weed"

Stoner 1:You and what Army man?"

(Chip just looks straight for a moment and in the next scene he's walking away with a box of Doobies whistling....how he can whistle without a mouth don't ask me bub it's my story-speaking of.....as he walks off he's stopped by a Axe Headed Guy A Gorilla and a Coyote)

Konk:Freeze you the Bearded Weirdo walking around the University?"

(Chip just looks at him confused)

Hatchet:Sorry there is like a billion Bearded Weirdos here....must of asked 50 people to show us their student ID"

Chip:Well.......Im not a student I'm just a Guy holding this Doobies I snagged from a couple of pot smoking retards...."

Colty:WAIT......that Pure Marijuana?"

(Chip eye widens......next minute everybody is smokin the Weed)

Konk:Man....they don't make this shit like this anymore...."

Chip:Very few thing my People can feel honestly"

Hatchet:So....why you here Chip?"

Chip:Surprise Visiting my Wife Ari Zira....."

Konk:The University Psychologist?"

Chip:Thank FUCKING God someone knows her"

Colty:Course we know her....helped me get over my Issues with my Mom"

Hatchet:Helped me get in touch in my inner self"

Konk:Helped me overcome my homicidal anger by finally coming out of the closet as a self confidant Bisexual Man"

(Everyone looks at him)

Konk:Yep I'm Bi(Changed subject)So you want us to help you find your Girl?"

Chip:Be Appreciated....."

Konk:Then let's go...."

(Other side Ari is visited by the Vice Headmaster Todd the Fox)

Todd:Ari how is the School's Best Psychologist?"

Ari:Kinda meh Morning but I'm better now. And you Vice Headmaster?"

Todd:Well.......I'M FREAKING OUT!!!!!!"THERE'S ANOTHER WEIRDO IN OUR CAMPUS......what if he's armed"

Ari:You shouldn't judge that person....for all we know he or she is probably hungry and as decent beings we should not be fearful but helpful towards the poor soul"

Todd:And THAT Ari is proof of your Tenure"

Ari:See there....wait SERIOUSLY???"

Todd:YES"

(Both Squeal in excitement but quickly calm down)

Ari:Finally I've worked hard for Tenure....."

Todd:And you deserve it a lot....(looks at the clock)oooh almost lunch care to join me?"

Ari:Why not?"

(The 2 leave for Lunch while Chip bonds with the Security Team)

Chip:This Campus has a BAR?"

Colty:Yeah it's called Barsco it's run by our Friend Rosco....if you plan to stay longer we can take you there"

Chip:Really?"

Hatchet:He has booze for everybody Even Lighter Fluid and Gasoline for Metal Organics"

Chip:Sounds like my kinda Guy"

Konk:Yo wanna get some grub first I'm hungry...."

Hatchet:Munchies Man....."

Chip:They're a Cunt"

(As they Chat Ari and Todd were walking to the Cafeteria as they bump into......)

Ari/Todd:MR.MANDERS?"

Mr.Manders:Hoho Hello Todd and Ari....(he's holding a tray of A Burger Tater Tots and a Sparkling Ice)Just in luck they're serving Bean Burgers my Favorite...."

Ari:That's great Headmaster...."

Mr.Manders:So Ari can I expect to see you at my Party tonight?"

Ari:Oh idk Sir I gotta check my schedule to see if it's not booked"

Mr.Manders:Oh I understand Duties come first you know....btw have you heard the news?"

Ari:No Sir(she lies thinking he's about to say she's getting Tenure which will up her pay making sure to help Chip with their Wedding)what is it?"

(Gestures them to move forward as they do and whispers to them)

Mr.Manders:The Security team found the Bearded Fellow who snuck in on Campus....."

Ari:Oh(feeling a bit dissappointed)well least they got him out safely"

Mr.Manders:Actually they didn't...."

Todd:They beat him up?"

Mr.Manders:No....hes still here"

(They turn to see the cart)

Ari:(In Horror)Oh No"

Chip:ARI!!!!!!(walks up and hugs her)Been trying to find you all damn day so far none of the students know your office....I had to beat up a bunch of Stoners as I 'took' their Cush and met my New Best Friends right here"

Konk/Hatchet/Colty: Hi Ari"

Ari:Hi Boys(to Chip)Why are you here....'Honey'?"

Chip:I wanted to surprise you by Romantically coming to your work"

MrMander:Mhmm(coughs as the Other Faculty joins in)Ari mind introducing us to your friend"

Ari:(Gulps)Right Mr.Manders Todd and Everyone this is Chip my Fiance....."

Wanda:(Whispers)Holy Shit she wasn't lying"

Todd:Well even though it's nice to meet you Mr......Chip was it? You are however tresspassing on University grounds"

Chip:Don't get your Panties in a twist Nick Wilde I'm here for Ari"

Todd:Why I never...."

(Just then someones bag was stolen)

Girl:HELP!!!!!"

Mr.Manders:THIEF!!!!!!"

Todd:Quick securi....."

(And in a flash Chip catches the thief and pummels him as he realizes....)

Chip:Holy Shit you're the Stoner Kid"

Stoner 1:You stole my livelihood man....gad to earn green somehow...."

Chip:Yeah yeah....(knocks him out)"

Mr.Manders:(Clapping)My My what skills you were amazing"

Chip:Twas nothing sir"

Mr.Manders:'Twas' ooh Ari your Future Husband is quite a sophisticant"

Chip:I try...."

Mr.Manders:Would you like to come to my Party Tonight? It's to Celebrate the Anniversary of our University being the first to integrate Metal Organics it will be catered and I'll announce a New Tunre Employee"

Chip:Huh can't say no to that plus free dinner I'll be there"

Mr.Manders:Oh Splendid"

Moe:Uuuuh Ari......"

Wasp:You okay Girl?"

Ari:(Grinding her teeth and says angrily)Never......Better"

Chip:Hey Hon I'm gonna start getting ready see you at home(kisses her cheek)"

Owlferd:Nice Bod...nothing on my Man though"

(Night of the Party And Chip and Ari are wearing their Best Formal Clothes)

Chip:Hmmm Swanky"

Ari:(Stops him)Look Chip this is not just some fancy party by your Rich Friends or by the Lewd Crew this is my Job with my Coworkers and Boss so please please PLEASE be on your best behavior alright?"

Chip:(Looks straight at her)Okay what's up you're really on edge?"

Ari:I'm not on edge it's nothing...."

Chip:Let's cut the Bullshit Ari you know we're on the same scale when it comes to smarts"

Ari:Dammit alright.....I...I was told I might get Tenure...by Todd...."

Chip:Fox Boy? Okay(thinking of something)"

(They Enter and Ari meets up with Wanda and Moe)

Ari:Hello Everyone....Wanda Nice sashes"

Wanda:Thanks Bug People don't usually wear clothes but even we can look pretty"

Chip:Nice Suit"

Moe:Right back at ya"

Konk:HEY CHIP"

Chip:KONK you made it"

Konk:Wouldn't miss it"

Chip:Where are the rest of the Guys?"

Konk:At Barscos. They ain't the Formal Types"

Chip:Heh the more I know about them the More I like them"

Owlferd:Hoohoo Hello Ari(accompanied by his Husband)Chip this is my Husband....."

Chip:BASILISK......"

Basilisk:CHIP......"

Chip:You old Son of a Bitch"

Owlferd:Seems you both know each other"

Chip:Shared a Mission once his Eyes of Penance whew Powerful Shit"

Basilisk:Had to be to stop those Humanoids....(to Owlferd)Later Hon"

Todd:(With his Rabbit GF Lydia)Ari hi...."

Chip:('Hmm guess I was wrong')Bunny GF? Goddamn you are Nick Wilde"

lydia:He tries"

Todd:Hopefully things go smoothly without(looks at Chip)interruptions"

Chip:(Just Grunts)"

Mr.Manders:(On Stage)Good to see all you lovely faces here Tonight"

Konk:This will take a while(drinks his flask)want some?"

Chip:Can't taste booze but what the Hell(drinks some) anyone else?"

Moe:Yo"

Mr.Manders:My Grandfather Founded this University in 1945 and My Father was the first to integrate with Metal Organics in 1958..."

Chip:Apparently his Family has a Jesus complex.....which Ironic for me...."

Wanda:How come?"

(Chip reveals his Star of David Necklace)

Wanda:Oh okay"

Mr.Manders:Now without further adieu our new Tenure is.......Ari Zira"

Ari:YES.....I mean yes"

Todd:Yay Ari"

Wanda:You go Girl"

Mr.Manders:Congratulations Ari and I'm also proud to pronounce our newest employee...."

Ari:What......"

Mr.Manders:I was impressed with his skills this morning and while he left to prepare for Tonight I asked him......would you like to be in our University's Security....followed by his yes.....Mr.Chip Cosmas"

Ari:Que..?"

Chip:Wanted it to be a surprise....now we can see more of each other"

Ari:But....your Assassin Business....the Training of the Next Warriors?"

Chip:I thought of spending more time with my Future Wife...."

Ari:Oooh(walks up to the drinks and start drinking)"

Chip:Why she upset? She got Tenure"

Todd:You really can't see it can you?"

Chip:You got something to say say it Foxy"

Todd:I doubt you can grasp it"

Chip:(Wanting to punch but holds back)Not worth it"

Todd:Good to hold back Huh Meto....."

(Chip heard what he said and as quick as lightning punches Todd slamming him on the table)

Ari:What the Hell?"

(Todd tried to fight back but Chip was better as he beat Todd up)

Ari:CHIP STOP IT....STOP IT NOW(holds him off)You seriously can't go one night without being an Angry Animal can you not even for me? And to my friend and Coworker?"

Chip:Ari you don't understand....."

Ari:What I don't understand is why you couldn't do this one thing ONE FUCKING THING for me....just NOT BE YOU!!!!!"

Chip:Ari he's trying to get with you.....by making me the bad guy"

Todd:What? No I'm not Ari is my Friend and I love Lydia you psycho....."

(And as Chip heard his Voice his words were true)

Chip:Then why where you an Asshole to me?"

Todd:Because you're image isn't right for Ari....shes sophisticated and intelligent but you're a Violent Monster....."

Chip:You don't know a Fucking thing about me.....Ari...."

Ari:Chip please.....I just.....dont wanna see you now....(she cries)"

(Chip leaves looking back and Konk goes to Ari saying)

Konk:He had another reason Ari....."

(At Barscos the Campus Bar Chip is drowning his sorrows in Arsenic and Gin)

Chip:Another Round....."

Rosco:Sure Pal.....(puts in the Lighter Fluid Soda Water and Gin)"

Chip:Leave the Cannister"

Rosco:Whoa Bud I can't just(Chip stares at him angrily) eh Fuck it(leaves the Lighter Fluid)"

(Second later Ari shows up and sits next to Chip)

Chip:Hey....."

Ari:Hey........"

Chip:I really Fucked shit up didn't I?"

Ari:Yes......."

Chip:Guess I'm fired?"

Ari:Could've......"

Chip:What?"

Ari:Konk told me what Todd said to make you Angry......seems I was the one who Fucked Shit Up in a metaphorical sense...."

Chip:You were caught in a misunderstanding that's all.....didn't mean your were wrong....I got Angry and beat the living shit out of your friends at work......"

Ari:Well after he used that Racist Slur He's knocked down a few pegs.....sigh it was true I thought you'd jeopardize my chances of Tenure"

Chip:Why you so hellbent on this Tenure Shit?"

Ari:It's because....I wanted the pay bonus to help pay for our wedding"

Chip:Ari I said I got it...."

Ari:Chip we're about to spend our lives together....that means we're a team and we should be there for each other"

Chip:Hmm......that Fox was right about one thing....you're smart as Fuck"

(Mr.Manders arrives)

Chip:Oh Headmaster.....sorry for earlier....I lost my shit"

Mr.Manders:I heard what Todd said he's taking a HR Seminar so he can be more open minded as for the party well.....since the Gym is a mess(the Caterers come in with the Food)Guess we can move it to this fine Bar...with Owner's permission"

Rosco:Got my Approval Boss"

(And so the night that started off unexpected turned into something better as Chip and Ari's Bonds grew stronger for it. The Next Day)

Ari:Ready for your First day?"

Chip:Hell Yeah I am(Walks to the Security Office and looks around ready for this New Chapter in his Life"

THE END

[estuarries]

baby’s first liveshow commentary

hello lads i have decided to attempt doing @nihilist-toothpaste​ inspired video commentary/write up/review thingies!!!! welcome to ramble-y fun time

phil’s liveshow on august 10, 2017

his smile in the first minute makes my heart so happy i love him so much

i love the eye-tongue-eye emoji stop being mean to it

he’s a bit late bc he just finished filming a new ap vid!!! it took him longer than he thought it would to finish filming bc he was rambling. this is a #relatable brain thing

“i just said goodbye and now i’m saying hello again!” wrt filing and then doing a liveshow makes me rly happy bc i wouldn’t have thought abt it that way. i love phil’s brain

new vid clues: paper bag(?) and bubble wrap. amazingphil asmr part ii??

dan’s not joining the liveshow bc he has a headache but phil’s gonna hop into dan’s next one

closed eyes and happy gesticulation whilst telling sleepy-morning “unexpected window cleaning man frightened me” story

phil’s fight/flight/freeze response is freeze

“imagine if i had decided to make breakfast naked! ...if i was that kind of person…” its okay m8 we know u like to make nakey bro brunches w danyul

are the emoji pants the only pair of graphic pj pants he has now ??? why are they being featured so prominently lately ???? phil IS an emoji is the only phnnie conspiracy i can support now

in the ap vid phil did SCIENCE and REACTED TO THINGS (chemistry . reaction . hehe :3)

he’s out of tv shows to watch ….he and dan have watched so many series together over the years ..... i am emotional

phil hasnt watched in a heartbeat EITHER !! BLASPHEMOUS BOYES!!!

re: rick and morty. i strongly agree and it makes me so nervous that rick burps all the time i cannot focus on whats happening in the show bc rick gives me so much anxiety

he misses the cherry blossom tree in thehowlter’s front yard and they are hopefully going to put it in when they have money

“you’re all like dan! not everything has to be symmetrical!” thank u for these affirmations that not everything has to be perfect thank u for being chill. a chill phil. 

“i dont mind a little bit of wonkiness!” “i’m at a bit of a wonk!” “is the entire house wonky?” the only real phil branding is ~WOnKy~

phils hands are so beautiful???? i love them?????? @ 8:50ish

him trying to figure out his best side and saying “one? or two?” as options like at the optometrist when ur getting ur eyes checked. 

someone in the chat: “both!” phil’s cheeky grin/”don’t flatter me!!!” response

someone in the chat: “side three!” i snort laughed along w phil this is truly Good Content. dark!phil RISE

phil doesn’t think he really has a bad side and his easy neutrality wrt his physical appearance is dreamy. i love him and i love that he’s comfy w himself like this

phil had an eye infection and this is the first day he’s been without glasses…… why does he glasses-bait us like this …..

it’s really hard for him to concentrate with dilated pupils so that’s why he was being a wee bit wonky in the last liveshow

his eye is no longer infected and is “white and ready to see!”. the tone of his voice, his accent, and the phrasingof that reminded me so much of my british grandma who i havent seen in a few years and now i want to call her i miss her

wicked was “as the kids say...Wicked.” I SNORTED AKLHFAEIHKF

also i cannot believe that he and dan used the same silly phrasewhen talking about their opinions of wicked. is it still #copyrightinfringement if its your bf blatantly enterprising ur intellectual property?

phil was feeling a bit meh going into wicked but now he’s converted and a fan

he loved defying gravity :(

phil: every audience is important! me: crying

phil loves coming-of-age/college/highschool aus … Me Too

phil remix: the top fans to the tune of mad world “all around me are familiar faces...lillyphanstuff, joteleena…”

he’s had “mad world” and also that fuckin. ditty song stuck in his head

“...is one thicc bih - NO!” is the best thing ive ever heard

im so sad that phil hasnt experienced the joys of ditty. apparently he doesn’t have it downloaded and doesn’t really know what it is

14:07 is my new ringtone (he sang the ditty tune in “doot doot doot”s)

“bandicussy” IM DEAD

phil thought it was a good family activity to see dunkirk but it made his parents very emotional bc his maternal grandad was in the war

making your entire family cry is apparently the phil way to entertain

neither he nor dan understood the timelines of dunkirk upon first watch

after filming his ap vid he sanitized using vanilla cupcake hand sanitizer

he watches zoe’s bath and bodyworks candle/lotion hauls??????? ME TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

apparently b&bw has some ~priiiicey~ candles. phil is the coupon clipping, consumer reports reading dad

he said that livestreaming games on dapg would be “dope”. i am reminded for the millionth time that he is a 30 year old white man. i am moderately uncomfortable.

jk it was someone in the chat who said it he was just reading the comment

“hi to the ‘phan’s moving boxes’ group chat”

facterino according to the nature man on tv: in england nature has decided that it’s autumn already. this is evidenced by blackberries coming out in august. because fall isstartingso early they’re expected to have a harsh winter but its fine bc he is excited for snow!

some climate change discourse

he’s not a big doctor who fan but his fav doctor is david tennant

he’s excited for the “lady doctor” and i’m uh. not a huge fan of that wording

23:02 pre-sneeze noises and hand motions are Delightful

apparently it’s southern england peeps who pronounce scone with a hard o (scOHne) and northerners pronounce it with a soft o (scAWn). phillu doesn’t know which pronunciation he uses

my mom grew up in cornwall (and moved to america when she was a teen. i’m american btw!) and pronounces it the northern way. we’ve had the scohne vs scawn debate!! lots of #britishfamilythings in this liveshow

philly homework motivation song @ 24:52

his first response to ppl being sad about school starting in a week is to calculate how many seconds are in a week so they can re-frame their time left in a way that feels more plentiful. i love this ???

i also really love how he tries to read premium messages from different people every time. idk that’s just really thoughtful and as a fan i really appreciate it

he knows that black makes him look good …. GOodBYe

today is world lion day!

phil is the one who puts the funny/random holidays on the dnp calendars. of course it was but im still so happily surprised  

doinganap’s sicth/sixth discourse

he’s reading people from the chat’s bdays and telling them what funny holidays are on their birthdays! i love how he finds different ways to get ppl in the chat involved every liveshow. i appreciate him so much !like yeah i know its a marketing thing but let me pretend its solely phil’s care for us

he wants to go back to japan

he can’t read or edit and listen to music at the same time! me neither

someone asked what a good pet would be and phil went on a lil tangent about how it’s important to have enough time to take care of the pet you choose!! dont get an exotic pet or a breed of non-exotict pet that requires a lot of time, money, or energy to care for it if you’re not at a point in your life where u can take care of it to the best of your ability! <3

hedgehogs are one of the most common animals in the uk??? what the heck?

he can’t remember whether or not he’s seen a hedgehog irl so he texts mum lester to ask <3 why is this the sweetest thing in the world . like seeing a hedgehog irl would be an experience that his family facilitated or even if he was moved out when it happened it would have been so exciting that he def would have told kath about it. so any way it happened she would know about it. my heart is Warm.

he’s not a huge summer candle burner but as soon as it’s september he’ll be on the pumpkin spice train

mum lester texted back and apparently his grandparents had a family of hedgehogs in their garage and his granddad built them a little hedgehog house to hibernate in :( wow!

phil might play shelter 2 … with dan. No Thank You. let us have some phil-only time plz 

shelter 2 is more of an autumnal game so he might do it later when he can cozy up with some cocoa and herd the badger babies

he feels a coffee buzz after five (5) chocolate-covered coffee beans. r u sure u even drink coffee phil????

rye bread is worse (in phil’s opinion) than regular bread and is ”claggy”. i busted out laughing and texted my mom IMMEDIATELY bca LOOOONG time ago we were at a family christmas party with my dad’s extended family and all of the Adults were playing scrabble. my mom ended up spelling claggy and everyone else was like THATS A MADE UP WORD WHAT THE FUCK!!!! and my mom was like ???? no its not? my dad’s family is from the eastern us and had never heard the word claggy before and i remember my dad giving my mom shit about it for YEARS afterward because she caused such an uproar. idk if it was a regional thing or if americans just don’t say claggy but REGARDLESS. my mom and i had a good laugh over this description of rye bread and we both love phil

he’s nervous abt what dalien is going to look like and become as he grows up. phil’s general reaction to dalien has been one of caution and nervousness and idk ?? someone more thoughtful analyze that please

his advice for making the most of the last bits of summer: do something you haven’t done before! immediately after bestowing upon us this Wise Advice he giggles and becomes self aware of his parental tone. Our Dad Is Becoming Self Aware

he doesnt swear around his parents?????? my mom says fuck all the time :0

2018 calendar and season two pastel plushies are in the works!

he’s singing another song to list the top fans. suggestions include toxic, the ditty tune, and the tetris theme. he goes with the ditty song and starts laughing in the middle of it so makes a seamless musical transition to toxic

if everything recorded properly with his new vid we should see it in the next few days!

he hopes that we have a lovely weekend and that whatever we end up doing brings us a bit of happiness :( i love him thank u phil

tiny little bonus song after he covers up the camera. schrodingers phil.

all in all i love phil’s liveshows and this has been the highlight of my day. thank u for reading!