#like jack frost is one of my favourite figures of all time

[not-poignant]

rotg anon here- I'm so, so sorry you went through that! I had no idea. I have never been in the rotg fandom, and only read your fics after FT. I am horrified and disturbed that people can be that viscious. It is harrowing to think you had to go through that and I apologise for bringing up such painful memories.

Hi anon,

Thank you so much, but it's also okay. It was a long time ago, I learned a lot, I have been lucky enough to continue really loving writing fanfiction and enjoying fandom, and fortunate that I made some great friends. AND also recovered enough that I can enjoy the Rise of the Guardians movie now! I didn't think that would ever happen again, but it did, which is great because the art and acting and all of it - it's a great movie.

Though yeah, for a while, things around fandom really did suck. There were certain things I never expected that were like 'what? People really do this? And say these things???' but they do. I became a lot more delete and block happy re: anons and Tumblr asks. And I'm even able to keep anon open / on, and I know a lot of people who just don't bother. But I think it's important as a function because like, as someone with social anxiety, I know how important that anon function can be to the shy ones in particular.

And it's okay re: the painful memories too <3 It was actually good to kind of just talk about it all at once. I realised enough time had passed that I safely could, and I don't think I've ever just...told the story? There's been sentences here and there, but it was good to just be like 'actually, this is what was happening, and it impacted me a lot, but I recovered and I still met some great people.' In retrospect, maybe I shouldn't have stayed so quiet at the time, because other people were getting hurt by these people too, and probably could have done with the support. But it's hard to know the right thing to do sometimes!

[safyresky]

"The snow is already GAY Jacqueline, WE'RE the ones MAKING IT!"

I feel like, in a way, this is a spiritual successor to this one lol. If Jacqueline doesn't confuse Jack at least once (1 time) per day, is she even doing her do diligence as both annoying little sister and middle child?

Bonus: this is by far the cutest Winter I have ever drawn

Happy pride! :)

[based on this classic]

[winter and jacqueline frost are my oc's. you can read about em here! they appear in the tag a lot but hey man, you gotta plug yourself when you can 🤷🏻‍♀️]

[that could've been phrased better]

omg okokok I was gonna put this all in the tags but my tags are ALREADY long as fuck but guys. you guys. do you know how I got these ding dang photos of the thing? I TOOK MY SKETCH BOOK INTO WORK AND USED THE BIG SCANNER. THE SCANNER THAT INTERNET ARCHIVE USES FOR BOOKS. THAT KINDA SCANNER. WE CALL IT THE LIZARD (it has lizard in it's name, I think) AND IT TOOK QUALITY TIFFS! That I had to flip to png's to post. BUT STILL! I GOT THE GOOD LIGHTING, EVEN IF SOME QUALITY IS LOST!

I mean, it's got layers and layers and layers of marker and metallic marker and pencil crayon and the like, so the smudgeness is not surprising, lol. Playing around with colours for the cold front was fun! I'll figure out my limited colour palette with Jack's usual fit at some point ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I wasn't sure if I wanted to add Winter or not but I asked the jury (since the og meme has jesse on a ladder) and the jury said YES and she's my favourite part of this whole ding dang thing. I drew her first. AND coloured her first. She has existed in all her =D glory a better part of the week! Best thing I've ever drawn hands down, I will NEVER top that lmao

anyway. scrimbly forthcoming at the end of the week hopefully, barring my busy ass weekend getting in the way! And I HAVE gotten the June prompts in ye olde inbox--y'all have given me some PUZZLERS. Has my brain doing the BIG THINK

[kiki-sleeps]

MHA - Hitoshi Shinso x reader

A/N: Exactly after a year since I've created my tumblr account, I've been so mesmerized by the sheer amount of content that I completely forgot about writing myself lol. Anyways, this a one-shot based on a character I created a long time ago and it was written around that time so my style is different from the Jack Frost story. Let me know which of the two you think is better and why if you feel like leaving a comment or a reblog <3

LISTEN TO THE SONG CHLORINE - TWENTY ONE PILOTS WHILE READING (I changed the lyrics a little bit to make them fit with the story, it shouldn't be noticeable tho) 

TW: Torture, mentions of needles, blood, (semi)gore, character death, wounds, tubes and stitches (lmk if I should add other warnings)

So where were you? It's been a little while

The doctor's voice wakes me up from my slumber as I feel multiple tubes and needles injecting in my skin. My eyes are half-lidded, blurry figures hovering over mine. Ahh, it's truly been a fair bit of time since I've been here. I didn't miss it. These experiments have been draining the life out of me. They put me in one of the capsules for monitoring and then he speaks again; 

"Aren't you happy? We'll do one of your favourites!" 

His voice is muffled by the glass, but I hear his sarcastic words perfectly. He turns his head to one of the nurses and orders:

"Go full out in the lungs" 

Sippin' on straight chlorine, let the vibes slide over me

The ugly smell makes its way through the mask on my face, and I can feel my senses going numb for the umpteenth time in my life. My head starts spinning, and so do my thoughts. This could be regarded as getting high, but it's nowhere near as happy as that. The euphoric feeling doesn't exist here. Just nothing. 

This beat is a chemical, beat is a chemical

The only thing I feel is the steady rhythm of my heart. Like a calm drum that goes in pair with the ringing in my ears. It's a lonely soothing feeling, like a lullaby that's just for me. 

When I leave don't save my seat, I'll be back when it's all complete

Memories come to mind. 

"Don't worry," I said to him. "I'll be fine." 

Lies. I should have just said goodbye when I had the chance. 

The moment is medical, moment is medical

My depressing regrets come to a temporary end as my tired eyes look at a finger tapping on the glass. They do this every time. 

"If you see it, it means you're healing." 

Healing from what? I've never been sick in the first place. You're the ones who created a whole clinical identity for me. 

I was fine, once upon a time. But my story is no fairytale. Just a bunch of unfortunate choices. Except for one. Deciding to give him the last hopes I had is the only thing I regard as the luckiest that could ever happen to me. 

Sippin' on straight chlorine

I want to cough, but I can't. I've tried, when I still had the will to resist. The result? Just vomiting. The tubes are too far and too deep in my throat to make me have any kind of relief by the action. 

Lovin' what I'm tastin'

Still, I like not being able to do anything. Gives me time to think. I never could do it, being worried about even surviving on to the day after. 

Venom on my tongue

Dependant at times

I'm fully conscious of the acid in my mouth, and I love it. Tastes like the ugly tears I've shed in my useless 17 years. Ah, this is too good. How ironic, I've come to appreciate the thing I hated the most.

This beautiful, addictive feeling. 

Poisonous vibration

The capsule shakes, more needles get into my arms. One goes in my cheek, stained with uncontrollable tears. 

Helped my body run

I remember the one time I tried to escape. And I almost succeeded. But seeing the light at the end of the tunnel was too good to be true. 

I'm runnin' for my life, 

Runnin' for my life

I can't explain how I found the strength to break the restraint that kept me here, I just did. But it didn't last long. I was suffocating after all. No one could run more than a couple of meters with all that toxins in the lungs. Like I have now. 

Sippin' on straight chlorine, let the vibes slide over me

This beat is a chemical, beat is a chemical

When I leave don't save my seat, I'll be back when it's all complete

The moment is medical, moment is medical

The process starts again. More silence. I focus on the memory of my hopeless escape. Why did I do it? In the end, I had nothing to live for. 

Right, when I only had these laboratories as a source of knowledge, how could I have the wish to be out? It was probably because I didn't know anything about the outside. It was the thirst for freedom. But now? I have nothing to fight for. I saw what I wanted and met the people I so desperately wanted to talk to. A disappointing experience, to say the least. When they found out I was a testing mannequin, they looked at me like everyone here always did. A monster. A beast, a creature that could go feral if it was so much touched. 

They all did. 

I blink, and an almost forgotten face in all the hatred surrounding my mind comes to thought. 

Shinso. 

He was the only ray of light in the ugly darkness of the world, the sole person who saw past the scars on my skin. 

Oh, yes. He'd be worth fighting for. All of his touches, every little inch of affection he deserves makes it worth the fight. 

Sippin' on straight chlorine

I inhale profoundly. I've decided. If not for myself, I'll do it for him. I'll get out of this hell hole and be free again. And this time, I won't be caught. 

Fall out of formation

Without making it noticeable, I slowly start to move my arms, testing what I can and cannot control. I can move almost everything, but the skin is completely numb, I've lost all sensitivity. 

Well, not like I care. This could be actually good, I won't feel any pain even if they shoot me. 

I plan my escape from walls they confined

I close my eyes and free my mind of everything useless. I have to make a plan, I can't just burst out and hope to be lucky. Think, think! What can you do? I could break out and take the nearest syringe to get to a weapon, but after that? More information, I need more! All the simulations in my mind end all in the same way: failure. There must be something– Oh. Yes, that could work. It kinda looks like my savior, that little annoying finger belonging to an armed guard. 

Ok, time to put it in action. 

I gather all my strength, and pull myself up with all the strings still attached to me. I focus on the hit I have to give to the glass with my head to make it break. 

Ah, it worked. 

Rebel red carnation

The pieces of the capsule cap I broke are impaling my arms, but I don't care, I don't even feel them. Blood is pouring out, almost too blue to be recognizable if not for the metallic smell it has. 

Grows while I decay

This isn't exactly the best thing that could happen. Losing blood means a higher chance of fainting and less resistance. Damn it. 

I jump out taking the shards of glass and throwing them around. At least I can make a bit of people incapable like this. None of them has to leave the room, I can't have the alarm going off just as I lifted a finger. 

I pull the guard in front of me by the hand. 

"This is the finger that likes to tap as if I'm a fish in a bowl, huh? I can't let you keep it then!" 

Is this my voice? It sounds foreign, a stranger that talks like me. Well, no matter, I can't be distracted now by futile things. 

With a little bit of sickening happiness, I cut off the hand of the soldier with the last shard and take his gun. 

I'm runnin' for my life

Runnin' for my life

Yeah, I'm runnin' for my life

Runnin' for my life

I spin and start to run, bare feet resounding against the floor tiles. My breath is ragged, and I'm opening my mouth like a gaping fish out of water. 

Had you in my coat pocket, where I kept my rebel red

Come on, come on! Think of him, he'll give you strength! I grit my teeth as the lights start to flicker and go red. Tch, they were able to give the alarm. 

I felt I was invincible, you wrapped around my head

It doesn't matter, I can still play. In my mind now the only thing that goes round and round are the words he once said to me;

"I love you"

Like a broken record, my head plays and replays the memory, as if to give me confidence. And it works. I don't care if I slip, I just run and run and run. 

Now different lives I lead, my body lives on lead

I want to be with him again, I want to be the idiot who thought he was joking when he asked her out, I want to be that girl again!! 

But it feels as if that is a totally different universe, where a lucky distorted version of me can be happy. But not the me right now. 

The mixture of chemicals is taking control of me, my eyes are starting to see black dots in the corners of my vision. 

The last two lines may read incorrect until said

No, it's not finished until I say so. I refuse to give up now that I have something to strive for. I didn't get drugged just to trip at the last second. I. Won't. Fail. 

The lead is terrible in flavor

I want to puke. And technically, I could. No plastic tubes are here to stop me now. No, no, bad thoughts. Just push it down and you'll be fine. Standing up, I gulp and dash down the white hall again. 

But now you double as a papermaker

As I run behind a corner to avoid some bullets, I'm taken down by memories again. Oh great, a panic attack. Just what I needed. The rush of colors in my head is fabricating episodes that never existed. Words thrown at me by my stupid brain created from layers of anxiety. 

And the first ones, always making me freeze in my steps, are said by the lips I love the most, twisting in a cruel smirk, a double faced mask covering the features of the boy I adore;

"You're a monster, how could I ever love you?" 

Supported by the real reminder of the only times we ever argued, the fake statement creeps fast through my mind, breaking the last bit of self restraint I have. 

I despise you sometimes

I shout, I have to move or these shadows lurking in my mind won't leave me alone. I start to talk in my head, to remain sane. At least, as sane as I could be. 

"Hey Shinso, you know what? I hate you. For making me do this, for making me wish for a life that wasn't mine to begin with!" 

But it's a lie. I love him, so much it hurts. 

I love to hate the fight and you in my life is like

And the actual discussions we had, I hated them with a passion. I could never be mad at you. How could I? The happiness I felt with you was so overwhelming. 

I could only see you. Kinda like

"Sippin' on straight chlorine" ,

let the vibes slide over me

This beat is a chemical, beat is a chemical

When I leave don't save my seat, I'll be back when it's all complete

The moment is medical, moment is medical

Sippin' on straight chlorine

I huff, this is taking a huge toll on my body. I don't know how many turns I've taken, how many people I've killed, and I can't bring myself to care. I just want to find the damn exit in this labyrinth of walls and closed windows. I want to be mad. I want to let myself be consumed by the rage that wants to erase this hell from existence. I want to, but I can't. For two simple reasons. Blood loss and toxins. I'm running on adrenaline and suppressor chemicals, the only quirk I have right now is the will to save my ass. 

Let the vibe, let the vibe

Let the vibe, let the vibe

Beat is a chemical, yeah

My heart is beating frantically, maybe I can finally go apeshit? 

Let the vibe, let the vibe

Let the vibe, let the vibe

Moment is medical, yeah

No, I have to stay sane. I don't want to die here because I couldn't control my rage. 

Sippin' on straight chlorine

Let the vibe, let the vibe

Let the vibe, let the vibe

Beat is a chemical, yeah

I can see it, I can see the emergency exit sign light! It's so close, I can get there–

My feet skidder on the floor as I'm stopped by a loud explosion. 

Out of hole in the wall, guided by the purple hair I recognize immediately, in all their glory stand my classmates from UA. How…? They're not supposed to be here, they're supposed to hate me! No, no, this is all wrong-

"Sorry for being late, love. This place was hard to find." 

Let the vibe, let the vibe

Let the vibe, let the vibe

Moment is medical, yeah

And I can see it. The dark circles under his eyes are even more accentuated than usual, he must have stayed nights awake just to find me. I'm so happy he's here, the tears come to my eyes in a reflex.

I'm so sorry, I forgot you

Behind him, in their full geared suits, my friends start to fire at the soldiers. Kirishima gives me one of his usual toothy grins. How could I forget the stupid nicknames, full of affection, the late night games, the long shopping sessions? How could I ever think the ones who lured me out of my shell could turn against me? 

Let me catch you up to speed

I run towards them. I throw my gun, I don't even care anymore. I just want to get to the blinding light they all emit, a promise of salvation I desperately want to grasp. I'm almost there, I'm almost there! 

A bang makes me gasp. A bullet, straight through my heart. I let out a blood-curdling scream. Ah, I'm falling. I look up ahead, Shinso's violet widened eyes are staring at me, his mouth open. I'm waiting for the impact, but he catches me. Sweet, sweet Shinso. Always going to be my knight in shining armor, huh? He turns me to face the ceiling as I lay motionless in his arms. I watch as he shouts for a paramedic. 

He then turns to me;

"Everything's going to be ok, don't worry, you'll be fine-" 

I stop him. I just want to tell him one last thing:

"I've been tested like the ends of

A weathered flag that's by the sea" 

All the pain is summed up in a sentence. Almost too easy to describe the amount of suffering. And yet, it fulfills its purpose. 

I ask him one last thing. 

"Can you build my house with pieces?" 

I'm just a chemical

Can you promise me you'll still do everything you told me? Will you continue to live without me, happy? Please do. All the things we wanted to try together, do them for me. And the smile you hid all these years, show it. To someone who can brighten up your days like I won't be able to do. 

"No, no, no! We have to do it together, you promised!" 

"Can you build my house with pieces?" 

I'm just a chemical

I take my hand up to his cheek, once full of wrinkles because of the joyful laugh only I was able to hear. I wipe his tears away. 

Promise me. Please. 

"N-no, I don't want to, there's still enough time! S-see? The ambulance is coming!" 

"Can you build my house with pieces?" 

I'm just a chemical

He starts sobbing, and places his hand above mine.

I'm fine with this. An appropriate death for a cursed life. I know he'll move on. He's strong. He'll achieve his dreams and so more. Even though I won't be there to see it. I ask him one more time.

"Can you build my house with pieces?"

At last, he promises. 

"I-I swear I will."

Good boy. Ah, it's time. I can feel my conscience slipping away. I'm so, so tired. I want to sleep. As I close my eyes, the last thing I see are his vibrant purple irises full of tears. At least, their comforting color will accompany me to the other side. If there is one for me, that is. There could never be heaven for a creature like me. 

After all, 

I'm just a chemical

[writing-good-vibes]

brad dourif characters x reader headcanons: birthdays (fluff and smut)

requested by anon !! what do our beloveds do for your birthday (spoiler, they (pretty much) all spoil you) warning for smut. more notes in tags

charles lee ray

avoids his own birthday but goes all out for yours

buys (or steals, don't ask) you a lot of presents

i mean a lot !!

new tv (stolen)

a lot of lingerie (classy)

you have a very late night the night before (takes you to a very rough bar)

lazy morning

expect a very happy birthday fuck to start the day

doesn't make you breakfast because he hates cooking

but does go out for coffee and your takeout breakfast of choice to bring home for you

has a cake professionally made/decorated

(because you made one for his birthday)

the message on top is something v horny like "your pussy tastier than this"

or it's like one word like "whore <3"

either way it is both hilarious and embarrassing that some poor bakery worker had to frost those words

takes you out for dinner (very fancy restaurant)

or to the movies

another happy birthday fuck when you get home

("how old are you again? guess that's how many rounds we've gotta get through tonight")

billy bibbit

billy doesn't much like his own birthday (his mom was too overbearing for him to ever properly enjoy himself)

but he is great at organising yours

lazy morning

as many kisses as years you are old

makes you breakfast in bed because he is a sweetheart

he makes you a present !!

he's actually really good at drawing and he fills a notebook with little drawings and pictures

(drawings of you and of things you love and one at the end of himself that he's embarrassed about but you love it)

then immediately thinks it isn't good enough and that he should of just bought you something

but you kiss him and reassure him that it's beautiful

the best present you've ever been given

you stay in that night to cook dinner together

he's definitely made you a cake !!

is it very aesthetic and the frosting is your favourite colour/flavour

sitting outside to watch the sunset !!

sheriff brackett

does everything in his power to make the day extra special for you

(has told his deputy not to bother him unless something really important happens)

buys you a sentimental/thoughtful gift

like some fancy thing related to your favourite hobby (e.g. expensive art supplies if you're an artist, etc.)

breakfast in bed !!

in your underwear, sun coming in through the windows

definitely the kind of guy to get ballons and banners to decorate the house with

(which is embarrassing but also wholesome)

takes you out to dinner at a very tasteful restaurant

you are birthday girl and he won't let you forget it

he's set the bar pretty high sex wise so has to pull out all the stops to make it extra special

clear your diary for the next 3 to 5 hours

("daddy's allowed to treat the birthday girl")

jack dante

forgets your birthday every time

its not that he doesnt care

but he has a lot going on

and keeping track of time whilst he's down in that basement is easier said than done

when you remind him that it is your birthday he gets more excited than you

sends you out to get cake and jelly and ice cream

which you begrudgingly go and get because you really think he might cry if you dont

sex is abundant but when is it not with jack

as it is your birthday he might be kind enough to give you a reach around whilst he rails you

when he actually gets you a present

(usually like a week late)

its either something actually brilliant (like the latest futurist technology (idk what they had in fake-future-2003))

or its something real fucking sleazy like a weirdo dildo ("so you don't get lonely when i'm not around")

doc cochran

would rather die than celebrate his own birthday

but he wants you to be happy on yours

(and every day)

gets you the best present

(where from? he has his ways)

definitely like some first edition copy of a niche book you like (poe, shakespeare, homer, that kind of thing)

makes sure he has no scheduled visits that day and wants to spend as much time with you as possible

(will personally beat Al's ass if he sends for him for no reason)

you spend the day talking about this and that

and he reads to you from the books he got you because goddamn does he have a beautiful voice

gets jewel to bake you a cake !!

gives you some special loving on your special day

this man knows how to take his time

usually he is busy and feels like he doesn't pay enough attention to you

so he makes up for it ten fold on your birthday

grima wormtongue

for a long while your relationship is pretty casual so he doesnt even know when your birthday is

once he actually figures out when your birthday is he wants to do something special

even if he isn't the most... emotionally open person

grima has sticky fingers so he tends to be able to get a hold of things that others cant

gets you something exotic, something you might not of ever even seen before

(think, pineapples or some other middle earth equivalent delicacy)

you appreciate him going out of his way for you

makes an excuse for you to leave meduseld with him

you go up to the fields and look out at the horizon

tommy ludlow

you both bunk off work to spend the day together

he is excellent at buying present(s)

knows exactly what to get you because he's a good listener

definitely gets you a record or new clothes

neither of you have much money so all your plans are always simple

but tommy is the perfect person to just hang out with, he's so mellow when he's with you

has no plans for the day except letting you do whatever you want

you drive around the city

end up going by the natural history museum

(because both of you are actually secretly soft and love holding hands and wandering around the exhibits)

or the met (because you both know your fair share about art, working around fashion shoots all day)

that night you go to some shady dive bar

(and drink too much, if that is your thing)

tumbling in through your front door, you two were never going to make it to the bedroom

"happy birthday" he smirks against you as you both lay, tired, on the living room floor

leo nova

spends so much money on you

mostly because he likes to show off his money

("when can i treat my girl to all that she deserves if not on her birthday?")

but partly because gift giving is his love language, or at least the only way he feels comfortable showing that he cares

a new dress that costs more than the rent on your old apartment, shoes that cost twice as much

takes you to the fanciest restaurant possible

and then fucks you in the dirtiest way possible when you get home

and he can go all night long

*wink wink*

tucker cleveland

hasnt celebrated his own birthday in years so has kind of forgot that birthdays are a thing

remembers yours like 3 days before and kicks himself for leaving it so late to get you a present

(you help him out by giving hint to what you want in the run up to your birthday)

keeps the whole thing very lowkey

which you don't mind, you're not into big celebrations anyway

he does get you a gift in time, thanks to your hints

he's probably at work during the day

but after he gets home and you have dinner together, he hands over his present

although you sort of already knew what it'd be, its definitely the thought that counts with tucker

"and the best is yet to come, don't you worry" he says smiling

of course, the real present is him pounding you over the table

(because who has the time to go up to bed)

[help-im-a-gay-fish]

Agave Syrup: ship kid. Secondary collab verse.

Annnnnd here's the new baby! She's my Cciller ship kid. She exists the the secondary ship kid universe which is a collab verse with @thebluescreen. She's from the Multiverse Rem is a part of, but not from the multiverse Coffee creamer is from. (They are two separate multiverses with different ships and storys.)

Both Agave and 4Loko are the same person, I'll explain below.

"yall really for a no caff, full foam, double chocolate latte, with an extra hit of caramel syrup!? It's my own special blend..... Added just for you~"

Name: Agave Syrup

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Strate

Parents: (Bio) Ccino (Da) and Killer (Baba). Non bio Nightmare (Father).

Other family: Rem (older half brother) Vanta (older half brother) Somba Lullaby (older half brother). Dream (uncle) Cross (Uncle) Radiant Hope (Cousin) Empathy (Cousin). And many cats.

Nicknames: Kitten (by killer) and Gave

Agave is the youngest of the Fluffynightkiller ship kids from the second verse. She grew up primary raised By Ccino and her oldest brother Rem. Killer and Nightmare were there, but weren't massively involved parents.

Agave is pretty close to her brother Rem, despite the 13 year age gap and will normally have a fortnightly movie night where they will watch crappy horror movies (like Jack Frost or The Sand) and laugh about how stupid they are. They also both love to watch old horror movies and play a game of "what incredibly stupid choice will character A make that will result in there death? Hmmm". It's there favourite thing to do together.

Agave isn't a huge fan of generally good horror films though and especially can't stand the saw films. So she doesn't watch them unless it's with Rem.

Agave and her other brother Somba aren't as close (he's 5 years older) but she still cares alot for him and isn't above defending him if needed.

Agave has two main sides to herself, this being how she is normally and her persona/alterego 4Loko. But more on that below.

Normally she is a very bright and chipper girl who's abit of a goof. She sees the fun or silly side in alot of things in life and is rarely not in a good mood. She's also quite a passive person (or at least pretends to be) and is quite kind. Her personality is abit to much like Dream's for Nightmare's liking so the two aren't really close.

She's that person who is very fun to be around but just slightly unnerving. Like there is something going on underneath her smile. Something just slightly off.

Being born with her soul on the outside of her body wasn't suprising because of her relation to Killer, however it caused Ccino to be conserned during her up bringing. He were quite scared about how easily she could be hurt of killed so always kept a close eye on her. Killer didn't care as much and gave her more free rain. For example, letting her play with this pocket knife as a 1 year old.

Agave works primarily at her Da's coffee shop and takes great pride in it. She grew up there and its been a part of her life ever since she can remember. She enjoys making her own flavouring syrups and blends to put into drinks to make them taste better. Other then that she's studying a business degree (at age 18 +) at a local university in order to get better with the business.

About 4Loko and her soul.

"Me? And serial killer? No no I'm a barista, those aren't even similar....."

Now this is where things start up, because she's got to inherit some things from Killer, right?

Agaves soul glitches, much like Killer's does, from being heart shaped to being target shaped. It does this many times a day. When this happens it normally doesn't last longer then a few seconds till it goes back to normal. To an outsider it may even be unnoticeable and for the most part it doesn't effect Agave.

However sometimes she will trap her soul into a jar or some type of container. Doing this will stop it from glitching and stick it in whatever form its in (she can't do this all the time as it strains the soul and brings pain). So sometimes she will stick it in target mode. When she sticks it in target mode, her eyes drip.

Unbeknownst to any of her parents when her soul is like this, it changes her. She feels basically nothing, no fear, no sadness, no guilt or empathy. She realised at a young age that this was her super power.

In this mode she could do anything and not suffer any emotional consequences.

It started with stealing cookies from the biscuit tin at age 9 and evolved into hurting bully's at school. Then into giving food poisoning to rude customers by mixing up syrups to slip into drinks to make people ill.

For the most part she stays out of this mode, only dipping in when she felt she needed to test how far she could push it.

When she was 15 she started to consider pushing it to the limit.

She was watching the news and found out about some kind of abuser or murder being arrested and she thought. Why do we let people who do such horrible things live? Wouldn't it be better if they were dead? Then she realised, with her super power, could she kill someone?

When she was 16 she had her first kill. They were robber shed caught beating someone in an alleyway. (I don't know to much about this yet so I'll need to think more about it) but afterwards, she realised that she'd been right in the fact that she didn't feel guilty. She could use this to make the world a better place!

She didn't kill again for about a year. (just incase, I wanna point out that I'm not saying that what Agave does is justified. She's just an ship kid, a act of fiction and not ment to be taken seriously)

So anyway, by age 17 Agave makes her second kill and continues on that path. These are alot more thought out and planned. Her method of choice is through creating poisonous syrup and killing people that way, though she isn't above a good old knife death. Her Baba taught her well. She also carries around chemicals to clean blood and things like that.

She doesn't like her victims to dweal in pain and gets the deaths over quickly and painlessly. She gets no pleasure from causing pain to others, and when she doesn't have a target soul it makes her upset to hurt people.

Agave ended up calling her killer mode 4Loko. That's the name for her alterego the serial killer. She separates 4Loko from herself and doesn't want it to impact her Day to day life. So she will use make up to cover the birth mark on her face. When she's in her 20s she ends up working as an hireable assassin for killing criminals. But more on that later.

Non of her parents know about her double life. But that doesn't mean no one does.

Rem has always kept a close eye on his little sister. Over the years he noticed her odd behaviour and her collection of 'syrups' that she keeps in her room hidden.

During her 17th year he confronts her about what she does (which was a huge mess) the two fought as she attempted to stab him through the soul with her knife. She couldn't let him live if he knew right? She would have been able to but she just couldn't bring herself to hurt him. Since she wasn't in target mode she just couldn't do it especially as he spoke to her and talked her down. (tbh it's actually a kind of sweet scene between them).

After he's calmed her Rem offers to help her kill people, and he's very happy to. (Rem has alot of darkness under his kind surface which I'm sure @thebluescreen would be more then happy to explain in better detail).

So the two grow closer through that.

And yeah, that's the basic run down of my Cciller baby.! Hope you like her! My barista turned murderer/hitman I figured this would be a good mix of both her parents.

You have no idea! How long I spent working on her colour scheme..... It took about a month till I finally had this one and I'm pretty happy with it. I hope I explained everything about her double life well, I wasn't sure how clear it is. If you have any questions, please ask.

<3

[shhhlikeme]

May i request for Fem reader taking a contemporary dance class, and gets paired up with her long time crush, Suga for a sexy duet routine! Maybe they were having some trouble expressing the sexual/sensual chemistry, if ya know what i mean haha. Nsfw pls! 👀 (idk why but Suga kind of looks like someone who could dance lol)

Sugawara Koshi x You, His Irresistible Dance Partner (NSFW) 🎥

————————————

A/N: You may lovely💞💞💞

I hope you like it:

————————————

“And one, two......three, four.....five, si— No! Wrong again, Koshi!“

Hades Liv, the world reknowned contemporary dance instructor at Miyagi’s School of Dance pinched the bridge of her nose as she halted counts. The surrounding male and female dancers stopped abruptly once the counts did.

A sweating, tight tank top wearing, Sugawara Koshi stopped dancing too, obviously irritated. “Hades. Why are you calling my name when it’s Y/N who is messing up—“

“Excuse me!” You pinched your silver-haired dance partner on the bicep.

He rubbed his arm but paid no attention to you, widening his eyes at his sensei. “See how she acts?! Juvenile! She’s the one who cannot pirouette to the right—“

You scoffed in disbelief, turning to defend yourself to your instructor. “Me?! I’m the problem?! Oh coming from Mr. Ex Volleyball Player here, that’s rich! He wouldn’t know the difference between a spike and a Seconde Spin if you shoved it up his ass—“

“ENOUGH!” Liv stopped pinching the bridge of her nose to point at you two. “I put the two of you as centre partner routine because in my opinion you are the two most TALENTED dancers in my class. But look how you are acting! In front of the new dancers, no less! I am ashamed! All you two have done since I paired you is let your personal differences get in the way of your counts! This is DANCE. A dance that should portray inseparable lovers, but INSTEAD you two are giving me........FRENEMY! No, no, no! Leave the drama and issues outside of the STUDIO! Go get some water, both of you. And when you return we will discuss your future at this company.”

“With all due respect, Hades, he—“ you started to defend yourself after being chewed out by one of the most proficient dance instructors in Japan, but Suga grabbed your wrist and pulled you out of the room with him. He knew better than to talk back to sensei Hades when she was so obviously upset. He was very annoyed that you didn’t know the difference.

Once in the vacant dance studio hallway, Suga didn’t let go of your wrist, he only backed you up harshly against the cold wall, you just barely dodged the bulletin board of awards. He pressed his sweaty front against yours, hovering over you as he spoke darkly.

“Look.” Koshi took a deep breath as his eyes bored into yours. “I don’t know how or why they moved you up to this class....but you need to get it together. I do think you have the talent as a dancer but your professionalism? Forget it.”

You challenged him with your eyes, ignoring the way his minty breath fanning your face was making you wet in your panties.

“You’re rude. I was told Mr. Ex volleyball player was sweet as candy.”

“It’s true, I’m very sweet. Until you piss me off, congratulations.”

“I’m shaking.” You respond sarcastically.

“You will be if you make me mad enough. I will not lose my spot as point partner dance because of you.” He glared down at you heatedly.

“Right back at you.” A mad Suga meant a horny you, so maybe you spun incorrectly, maybe you toyed with him on purpose.

Just then, the door to the studio swung open and all the dancers filed out with their bags, signalling the end of the dance rehearsal.

“Koshi. New girl. Liv wants to see you two once everyone leaves. She’s waiting in there.”

Sugawara nodded, still trapping your warm body between him and the flat wall. You analyzed his brilliant neck. There were droplets of sweat dripping down from his Adam’s apple disappearing under his wifebeater. Damn did he look good in his wifebeater. You wanted to be that drop of sweat so baaad.

You pushed Suga off of you so that he couldn’t feel the way your heart sped up by having him so close when you weren’t dancing.

Yes, you had a major crush on the Jack Frost look alike a.k.a ex-volleyball player turned dancer. Look at him.

No, you would not admit it to anyone but yourself.

“After you.” Suga smirked as he opened the door for you to re-enter the studio. You gave him a sickly sweet sarcastic grin and waltzed in.

Upon arrival, Hades was pacing around the room, staring only at the floor. She was a beautiful elderly woman, lean figure with a big grey afro and dark skin that hasn’t aged a decade.

“I have a plan.” She announced as you and Koshi stood next to each other in front of her. “You two are only lacking one thing: fire. I’m getting ice. The dance moves are there but I need to FEEL the heated chemistry.” She stopped pacing, looking at the two of you with hopeful eyes. “My plan is quite theatrical, but the show is in 3 days. You leave me no choice. I have no other two dancers good enough that I could replace you with, and I refuse to let my dance company be embarrassed.”

“What will you have us do?” Koshi asked: scared-like. You looked up at him and saw that there was slight fear in his handsome face.

It made you apprehensive because Suga knew Hades Liv much better than you did having danced with her for years. For you, it’s only been 4 months. You gulped.

Hades sauntered over to her floral bag that she kept by the mirror. The bag no one was allowed to touch.

Beside you, Suga froze. “Don’t do it, Hades.............” He whispered under his breath and you nudged him.

“Don’t do what??” You whispered back in a panic. “Koshi what are you afraid of—oh.”

The lean dance mogul had retrieved what she wanted from the bag, holding it up for the two of you to see.

You gasped.

Suga looked away in anger.

They were a pair of handcuffs. ⛓

“If you two want to be a part of my show this Friday, then I want you two handcuffed for 8 hours a day, everyday, until the show.”

“But—“ you started, as to which Suga just shushed you rapidly.

“Got it.” He said.

“Good.” Liv replied, with a smile for her favourite student. “I’m glad there are no issues, Suga.” She threw the handcuffs over and Suga caught them. Hades glared at you. “And Y/N. I hope there are no issues on your part. I would hate for a new dance career to be over before it even started, because other companies heard that a certain new dancer couldn’t get her first big role together.”

You gulped again before letting your head fall in defeat.

and that’s how you ended up handcuffed to your silver haired crush for 8-hours a day, for 3 days

It was.....interesting

Mainly because.....

....About 3 of those hours each day were spent getting your back blown out since Suga couldn’t keep his eyes closed like he promised to when you had to undress

The truth is, Suga had a major crush on you, too, ever since the first day you walked into class and Liv had announced you’d be his partner

Just like you, he tried to disguise his strong attraction by putting up a metaphorical wall as to not let you see how fucking horny you made him every time you danced together

That means you two had double the walls stopping you from connecting through dance

Hades Liv could see the walls. And that’s why she handcuffed the two of you

The sexual tension between you two adults was through the roof and it was getting in the way of the success of her dance company? Oh hell no.

Handcuff tf up, she said

You weren’t complaining though,

Not anymore.

Not when it was the day before the show and Suga had pulled you into one of the many empty studios in Hades’ building.

He locked the doors and slipped his finger down the front of your leggings, using his skilled setter hand (that wasn’t handcuffed) to finger you to ecstasy.

You moaned loudly as he skimmed your sweet spot within.

Using his mouth to shut your moans up in a searing hot kiss, he pushed you over the edge to your orgasm.

“Fuck. You’re so hot, Y/N.” Suga ground his erection into your side as he pulled his finger out of your heat and proceeded to tug down your leggings fully. The hands that were handcuffed he held above your head like he did before when he grabbed your wrist. It mystified you how amazing this man was at sex with only one freaking free hand, but like I said—you weren’t complaining:

You were moaning.

Constantly.😩

Once he got your leggings down to your ankles and you stepped out of them, using his working hand to hitch one of your legs around his hips before he pushed his hard dick into your dripping heat.

You cried out in pleasure as Suga roughly pounded into you, kissing you at the same time. He was a phenomenal kisser.

Once you got a hold of your moans Suga pulled away from the kiss.

“I’ve wanted to fuck the shit out of you for months.” he fanned his minty breath on your face again as he drilled into you. You whimpered.

“I have to stop fucking you or else you won’t be able to dance anymore.” He grunted as he got deeper.

“No!” You pleaded. “Please d-don’t ever, stop—Koshi!”

Koshi smiled his sweetheart smile that made everyone think he was an angel.

Yeah right. He wasn’t an angel to you when it came to giving you unrelenting orgasms.

Suga pulled out his cock swiftly, using his handcuffed hand to spin you around much like one of the elegant dance moves in your routine. He pressed his cuffed hand on the mirror over yours and moved your other hand to do the same so he was behind you. Seeing you in the mirror as he started fucking you from behind.

“You’re gorgeous.” He moaned, watching your erotic expressions through the mirror as he thrusted into the pussy that he could only describe as magical. He held onto your hips to steady you as he drilled in from behind.

Watching you made him hornier and hornier in the process.

“I love to see all your expressions in the mirror like this, Y/N. You are gorgeous when you dance and you are gorgeous when you are taking my dick.” He slapped your ass making you clench around his dick. “You feel so good inside, my dear partner. Better than I ever imagined. Can you open those pretty eyes for me?”

You listened to your dance partner, looking at him through the mirror with drowsy eyes. Suga thought you looked so sexy.

“Oh, yes....” He moaned and drilled harder. He stared at your bare dancer legs that he always secretly stared at while you stretched. You started to moan too loud and there were classes going on so Suga clasped his free hand over pretty mouth.

“Shhhhhhh. If we get caught, I won’t make you cum.”

“Zefyestfbiujxrbjdnislxapdwjdu...” You tried saying ‘I promise, Suga, please...’ under his hand.

Suga slowed his pounding to a slow thump, knowing from this mornings fuck that you liked it nice and slow when you were on the edge.

You reached your second climax, screaming into his hand.

Suga followed soon after you.

“I’m going to miss not being handcuffed to you after we perform, my beautiful partner,” He sighed.

on the night of the performance, Hades had cried happy tears because she had never received a standing ovation so long

The amount of raving reviews from Japanese critics about Hades’ dancers’ astonishing chemistry and heat retention about all performers but namely Suga and you, was unprecedented!

It skyrocketed your dance careers

And brought so much money to Hades’ Dance company and studio

The next evening after cool down and before the wrap party, you and Suga approached Hades in her office to return the handcuffs she leant you...

The beautiful Afro’d dance instructor just studied Suga in his entirety, then you— with an eyebrow raise. She did this for one whole minute.

“Keep it.” Hades insisted finally, before spinning her office desktop screen around so you and Koshi could see.

On her computer screen, were several small boxes showing the real-time camera footage of every single studio room in her building. Currently vacant. Both yours and Koshi’s heart dropped when you noticed that the 5th camera box demonstrated the same studio Koshi gave you several orgasms in in yesterday. Feeling like throwing up, you looked away from your instructor’s screen... back up into the dancing pupils of Hades Liv. “Please, keep it.”

She smiled at both of you before proceeding to walk out of her office.

“You two might get way more use out of it than I will.”

[leesh]

because i have zero self control when it comes to christmas films and, well, cheesy christmas films are #life. 

basically, i have developed a collection of favourites over the years, including both classic christmas films that are fun for the whole family and terrible, dripping with all our favourite favourite cliches hallmark christmas films, and yet i am still always on the hunt for more. so, i thought i would try a little thing to share them with everyone else as well (and actually remember them for future reference)!

check out the tag here i will try and remember to use as i live blog some of these movies or head on down below the cut to see all of the christmas films i’ve watched in 2020. thoughts and star ratings included! as expected, i will also be updating this as i watch more and more this holiday season (follow along on twitter too if you want).

note: since i LOVE terrible hallmark films, some that i give a higher rating will not actually be......critically acclaimed. i am just #obsessed and have my reasons as stated, i’m sure.

holidate (2020) 

⭐️⭐️| first time watch | someone on letterboxd compared this movie to when you watch a rom com in sims and it’s just a bunch of random scenes that make no sense and they’re absolutely right. its only saviour is an australian dude and the line “so you know me well enough to cum in my mouth, but you don’t know me well enough to get me a christmas present?”

my christmas inn (2018) 

⭐️⭐️| first time watch | i’ll be honest, this film was pretty forgetful. i watched it over a month ago and don’t really remember what happened. however, i do remember being impressed that the leading lady wasn’t a stereotypical thin white woman. so i guess at least it has that going for it.

christmas made to order (2018) 

⭐️⭐️⭐️| first time watch | i actually thought this was pretty cute. it’s not the best, but also not the worst, so a decent medium if you need to fill up those figurative christmas stockings. the concept of hiring someone to decorate your entire house with no budget sounds pretty cool, but when the guy is aaron samuels and looks far from straight, it becomes a little questionable. 

last christmas (2019) 

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️| rewatch | now this is not a cheesy hallmark film. in fact, i LOVE this film a lot and think i saw it twice at the cinema. last christmas is a top tier christmas song and i remember theorising about it when the trailer first came out, but i will say tissues may be a requirement to watch this. AND henry golding is my husband thank u and goodbye.

operation christmas drop (2020) 

⭐️| first time watch | interesting concept in theory, but this is nothing more than US military propaganda and a cgi lizard. bonus: white saviourism. 

the knight before christmas (2019) 

⭐️⭐️⭐️| rewatch | a medieval knight transported into today’s world and has never seen a car before can drive better than me. that’s it. that’s the movie. also, he literally says the words “modern technology is lit af” at one point. solid christmas film if you ask me. 

the princess switch (2018) 

⭐️⭐️⭐️| rewatch | i strongly believe in the vhcncu (vanessa hudgens christmas netflix cinematic universe). i also have so many questions, like how did they afford the flights or solid conversation or was it all expenses paid? how did they finish a bulk of the cake without a mixer? why does everyone always speak english with a posh english accent even though it’s a non-english european country?

the princess switch: switched again (2020) 

⭐️⭐️| if we learnt anything from a christmas prince, it’s that sequels are generally never better than their predecessor. that being said, this was much less cute body swapping christmas fluff and a little more literal kidnapping and saving the day. either way, blonde vanessa was hot and i appreciated the amber/richard cameo that insinuates a christmas prince is actually a dramatic documentary.

midnight at the magnolia (2020) 

⭐️⭐️| now if you’re after an absolute cheesefest that ticks the boxes on best friends meets fake dating over the holidays, then this is the movie for you! albeit it takes place between christmas and new year’s, it’s still filled with their families knowing they were soulmates the whole time and two people who are a literal too comfortable on the radio. also, the dad’s totally should’ve been gay. they had more chemistry.

christmas wonderland (2018) 

⭐️⭐️⭐️| tbh, i genuinely enjoyed this one. post breakup/high school sweethearts is a personal favourite trope of mine, so throw christmas & being forced to spend time together when she goes back home into the mix and i’ll have a serotonin explosion. bonus points for the guy telling the girl to go back to nyc to follow her dreams without being a dick. OH and the scene when he points a fuck load of sugar in his hot beverage.

a wish for christmas (2016) 

⭐️⭐️| who doesn’t love a good office romance between a boss and an employee at christmastime? especially when you throw in a little christmas magic that makes her more confident that results in her finally getting what she deserves and having to travel and rekindle with his family? also, fuck them rich white dudes, but props to her for the significant job promotion.

christmas with a prince (2018) 

⭐️| this was TERRIBLE and not in the good way. it featured: an entitled prince who suddenly had growth even though he did nothing to achieve it, majority of the film set in one hospital room, and the fact that she’s the only one with a tiara at the party filled with people who actually have titles. also, thought there was a decent ending but turns out there was still another 30 mins to go. ugh.

a royal christmas engagement (2020) 

⭐️| don’t be fooled by the title. the engagement doesn’t happen til the last two minutes. it’s actually about a prince (bet you didn’t see that one coming) who travels to america, pretending to be his best friend who works for this major marketing firm because he’s tired of being the spare. this gets one star purely for the line “she’s not a commoner, patrick. she’s an american.”

christmas wedding planning (2017)

⭐️⭐️| it looked like it would be half decent, and while it’s definitely better than the last two, it was still pretty eh. i could get on board with her texting her dead mother’s number as a way to talk to her still, and i understand we all experience grief differently, but.....actively paying your mums phone bill 3 years later? girl. also, the end made me SCREAM. WHY DID THEY DO THAT!!!!

santa girl (2019)

⭐️| this was just painful to watch. evil jack frost makes memes in his free time, santa has a fancy car and doesn’t eat sweets, and there’s an odd comparison between the elves, minimum age workers, and racism. however, one star purely for the entertaining (read: bloody awful) tooth fairy cgi that gave me a right laugh.

the christmas chronicles (2018)

⭐️⭐️⭐️| this was really cute and had the makings of what could be a christmas movie staple along with the likes of elf and the santa clause (but will never reach that standard, obvs). tbh, it’s just a nice heartwarming family christmas movie about two siblings who band together to help santa and save christmas. also, santa was a #dilf.

the christmas chronicles: part two (2020)

⭐️⭐️| one of these days i would love to see a sequel that’s better, or at least on par, with its predecessor, but that day is not today. sadly, this film lacked all the heart and magic the first one was filled with and some scenes were pretty redundant. kurt russell and goldie hawn, however... one star for each of them.

forever christmas / mr. 365 (2019)

⭐️⭐️| the title varies depending where you’re from, but that’s probably the most exciting part of this movie. a guy celebrates christmas 365 days a year and a reality show wants to invade his house? ok, sure. one star for the eye candy and one star for, surprisingly enough, their chemistry and all the kissing scenes that don’t usually make the mark in the hallmark world. 

noelle (2019)

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️| did i renew disney plus just so i could watch this (and a couple of others)? maybe so... this movie is so fun! and family friendly! and is actually funny! it gives me major elf vibes, but if elf was set in a more modern day setting. either way, i had a great time and have been holding out on this one after loving it a lot last year!

the nutcracker and the four realms (2018)

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️| anything nutcracker related is an instant win in my book because it’s my favourite ballet of all time (except for graeme murphy’s version, we don’t talk about that). does this movie actually deserve the four stars? maybe not. am i going to give them anyway purely for my love of the nutcracker and the soundtrack? absolutely!

[lowsyjets]

Hi! I discovered your blog not that long ago and you know a lot about individual players really well. I got into hockey not that long ago so I have a few favorite teams and a few favorite players and watching the playoffs has helped solidify that. But I'm not too knowledgeable on the personalities of individual players. In your opinion, what players should I look out for (ex. Bennington) & why? Also, out of curiosity, who are your top favorite teams/players? Thanks! Have fun watching playoffs!

oh man...what an ask. this is gonna be a long one lol

i’m gonna be honest with you, i’m pretty new with this hockey stuff too...like i started my blog in january or february of this year so i still have A LOT to learn and i’m educating myself everyday. i learnt a lot about different players from tumblr and all of these amazing hockey blogs

i don’t want to make this ask too long so here’s a small list of players that came to mind who you should watch out for:

tony deangelo

brendan lemieux

jordan binnington

max domi

seth jones

jack eichel

zach werenski

auston matthews

if you go to @leafsbabe account and go through their “twitter likes review” tag, you’ll find so many more and exactly why you should watch out for them

now here’s a list of my favourite teams and my favourite players😌: 

winnipeg jets cause they’re my home team🥰 love them long time. fav players would be mark scheifele & blake wheeler (daddy wheels), they are my absolute favourites and can do no wrong in my eyes. honourable mentions go to adam lowry my baby daddy, patrick laine a finnish king, and kyle connor my favourite 30 goal scorer

philadelphia flyers cause i got into them when i started liking patty boy and found out they’re actually a very elite team. fav players would be claude giroux bc he’s my dad and an underrated king, travis konecny bc of his chaotic yeehaw vibes, nolan patrick of course bc he’s just so special and a fellow winnipegger. honourable mentions go to joel farabee bc i love his young beezer vibes and morgan frost bc i like his mustache

calgary flames i only like bc of one man and one man only who goes by the name of matthew tkachuk. he’s a little rat and annoyingly cocky but his blue eyes, dimples, and curly hair make up for it🤷🏽‍♀️ honourable mentions go to sam bennett bc of his immaculate playoff beard and johnny gaudreau bc he’s somehow figured out how to stop aging and looks like he’s still 14

colorado avalanche i actually just recently got into...this team is just very sexy talent wise and looks wise. my fav player would be nathan mackinnon bc he’s a big sexy fridge boy who’s a very talented #1 overall pick who i would take on my team over connor mcjesus. honourable mentions would go to gabe landeskog who is just the perfect male specimen and such a great captain, andre burakovsky bc he’s proved he’s an elite goal scorer and i’m so proud of him🥺, and nazem kadri who i like to call king kadri who’s shut up all of his haters this year and i’m all for it

💖i will also love and support any bipoc player in the league bc they deserve all of the love💖

[chilling-seavey]

Anything But Mine (d.s.) - Chapter Fourteen

A/N My queue wasn’t working last night so I forced myself to wait to upload the next chapter directly. Looking forward to hearing your thoughts on this one ;)

Friday, November 29th, 2019

The 25th was Corbyn’s twentieth birthday; so the following Friday night he wanted to go out with his friends to celebrate. Despite Daniel’s protests, Corbyn decided to invite Florence too. She was also his friend and he knew she needed some time to relax, away from her motherly responsibilities. Aidan convinced his parents to take Clementine for the night as he knew Florence wouldn’t come along if no one would watch the baby. A club was not the best place for a ten month old.

At 8pm, the doorbell rang to the boys’ house and Aidan ran to answer it. Florence and Emilio stood on the doorstep hand in hand. One look at the girl in front of him and Aidan’s mouth fell open. She simply smiled at him and walked inside, leaving Emilio to greet a stunned Aidan and follow her towards the living room.

Her black four inch heels clicked over the wood floors, drawing the eyes of the boys who were sat around the living room. As if all at once, they raked their wide eyes down her tight red dress that ended mid-thigh and was cut low down her chest. Her fuller chest finally filled out the top of her favourite old cocktail dress, hugging her soft post-childbirth curves beautifully. Her blonde hair was straightened over her shoulders and thick black eyeliner coated her blue eyes, the look completed with vibrant red lipstick.

“Hey.” Florence said to the boys in the room who still sat in stunned silence. She didn’t seem to notice their gawking. It was still proof of the slight innocence that pumped through her veins.

They all mumbled a greeting. Daniel, who avoided looking at her as she came in, finally looked up, his eyes almost popping out of his head. Sure, he’d seen her dressed up before, but nothing like this. Instinctively, his tongue ran over his lips, a blush rising to his cheeks at only looking at the girl in front of him.

Emilio coming up behind her and wrapping an arm around her waist made Daniel sigh and look back to the ground.

“Ok.” Aidan clapped his hands once to snap the room back to reality. Florence was almost like a sister to him and having his friends next to drooling over her made him slightly uncomfortable.

The boys in the room all started talking innocently, getting up and gathering their few things they needed to take with them. Zach walked up to Florence and held out a small card.

“What’s this?” she took it from him and looked it over. It was his drivers license.

“Jack helped me get it.” Zach pointed to the birthday line which read as if he were 19.

“Oh my God!” Florence gaped. “It looks so real!”

“I know!” Zach beamed, taking the card back from her and smiled down at it proudly.

“If you act so excited about it, they’ll catch on.” Jonah told his friend. “And I’m not bailing anyone out of jail today.”

“No getting arrested on my birthday!” Corbyn said.

“Even though it was four days ago.” Florence chuckled, pulling him in for a hug. “Happy belated birthday.”

“Thanks.” Corbyn smiled.

“Hurry up! The subway will leave without us!” Zach shouted as he walked towards the door.

“Don’t make me put you in one of those kid leashes.” Aidan taunted. Zach frowned up at him. The group filed out of the house and headed towards the subway. Florence and Emilio walked hand in hand behind Aidan and Jonah who led the way. Jack, Zach, and Corbyn talked loudly from behind them, pushing each other over people’s lawns and into the street. Florence looked behind her, past the wild group of three, to where Daniel trailed behind them, alone. His hands were stuffed in the pockets of his denim jacket and he stared at the ground, kicking pebbles in his path. Emilio brought her hand up to his lips and he kissed it softly, making her turn her attention away from Daniel.

“He’s fine.” Emilio whispered. “Just give him time.”

Florence wanted to protest to that statement, wanting to do nothing less than turning and screaming at her so-called best friend to just love her again. She missed his warm presence, his lively smile, and how he was always there for her when she felt her worst. She felt empty without him next to her.

The trip through the subway earned Florence plenty of stares from guys and girls alike. Emilio held her hand proudly, not failing to pull the unaware girl against his chest if an older man stared at her for too long. They were the same height, Florence able to lean her head on his shoulder comfortably. Of course her height and her heels only accentuated her long legs, some of the boys from their group who were sitting on their way trying desperately to look anywhere but at her as she stood in front of them. Daniel was facing away from them, his head against the window. When they arrived into the downtown core, Jonah had to nudge him to get off the subway.

The night was young and the city was bustling, thousand of lights from the skyscrapers lighting up the invisibly starry sky. Their group walked excitedly, Corbyn taking the lead with his birthday-excitement. Daniel found a spot next to him, Corbyn’s bubbly personality easily working on brightening his spirits.

“We’ll get some strong alcohol in your system and music in your ears you’ll forget about everything.” Corbyn whispered to Daniel, draping his arm over his best friend’s shoulders.

Florence heard it from her spot behind them and she frowned, her gaze falling to the sidewalk. Emilio was right there with a comforting squeeze to her hand and a gentle kiss to her cheek.

The club was a hole-in-the-wall joint, past an old, crumbling Toronto brick exterior lead into a revamped and modern interior. The neon sign above the door flashed brightly. Florence stood admits her friends in the line-up, sandwiched against the wall between Emilio and Aidan. They talked excitedly amongst themselves for the duration of the wait, the cool nighttime air starting to send chills over the group. The front of the line came a long 45 minutes later, each member of their party flashing their IDs to the bouncer on their way in and tossing a two dollar coin into the collection box at the entry. Once headed up the stairs, Zach gave a little hoot and took off ahead.

The place was bright and busy, neon lights flashing and the dance floor bustling full of people under bright white strobe lights. The granite top bar lined an entire wall, the black stools mostly filled with patrons awaiting another round. Various couches, chairs, and small dining tables encircled the large dance floor, the dark furniture blending into the background. The raised DJ booth was set up opposite the bar and huge speakers framed it, the man working the table looking small in comparison.

“We got a room upstairs.” Corbyn yelled over the music, gesturing for his friends to follow him. Next to the DJ booth, a curtain was hung over a thin doorway and upon further inspection, it opened to reveal a staircase that was only lit from tiny LED lights along the treads. At the top, the security guard looked at Corbyn’s ID and then down to his clipboard before leading them to a section of the loft. Each room was divided by black walls and had frosted glass doors to enter through. On the inside, the group found a two white leather sectional sofas, a small buffet, a spacious coffee table, and a single black bean bag chair.

“Oh sweet!” Zach cheered, plopping himself down on the bean bag, draping his hands behind his head.

“This is sick.” Aidan smiled, grabbing a few crackers from the buffet table.

“I have some connections.” Corbyn shrugged, sitting down on the couch. The music from the main area of the club pumped through the walls, the sound muffled enough that they could have a conversation but loud enough that it drew them back downstairs.

Shots were poured down the bar and the group clinked glasses to celebrate Corbyn’s birthday before they tossed one back each. After that, the group broke off to do their own thing, most of them finding their way to mingle in the main area of the club.

Daniel stayed at the bar at the stool in the far corner, sipping his drink slowly, his eyes taking in the surroundings of the unfamiliar place.

Florence and Emilio were on the dance floor. He was trying to get her to dance but she insisted she had to drink more before she did any sort of dancing. As if on cue, a server pushed two more shots into their hands before being swallowed back into the crowd.

Zach, his excitement high now diminishing, stood at the side of the room and watched the people around him, trying to figure out what to do next. He finally joined Daniel, the two looking like the most pathetic duo in the building.

“Why aren’t you out there with everyone?” Zach asked, nodding towards Corbyn and Aidan and Jack who were dancing stupidly near the speakers, freshly opened drinks in hand.

“I’m not feeling it tonight.” Daniel shrugged.

“Are you ever feeling it? This is not really our go-to scene.” Zach said.

“Fair point.” Daniel chuckled, looking down at the bar top. He took a sip of his fruity cocktail.

“Nice manly drink there, bro.” Zach snorted. Daniel stuck his tongue out at him.

“Don’t know why Corbyn wanted to come here even.” Zach continued. “We all know he’d rather be at home spewing off space facts to his bedroom ceiling.”

Daniel laughed at that, hiding his face in his hands as if it was wrong of him to have fun.

“What? No one else is gonna listen.” Zach shrugged playfully.

Daniel forced his smile back to a straight line and scuffed the toe of his sneaker against the wall.

“Hey, stop that. Stop whining like a little bitch.” Zach said to his best friend. “Drink more of your girly drink and get out there.”

“You’re one to talk.” Daniel scoffed.

“Then tell me what I should order and lets get a move on.” Zach clapped his hands.

The first hour went by in a blur, drink after drink being downed by the group. As fancy as the loft room was, no one used it; everyone seemed to find their place in the main hub of the building. Jonah had found a girl at the bar who was there with her friends and he put on his usual charmer persona to win her over and they retired to a table in the back to talk and drink. Zach and Jack had found each other and were joking around messily by the huge speakers, barely hearing a word the other was saying but laughing nonetheless. Corbyn’s girlfriend had shown up and they had disappeared into the crowd. Daniel was still at his spot at the bar where Zach had left him after not being able to get him up. Multiple drinks had been had and Daniel was starting to feel wobbly on the bar stool. Now joined by Aidan, the boys spoke in whispers. Florence and Emilio were still on the dance floor, after having a few drink breaks. Emilio never left her side, fearing the worst under the prying stare of other male club-goers. The tight red dress turned to be more of a curse than a blessing as not only did it attract too much attention but Florence found herself having to pull it farther down her legs more often than not. A few drinks in, the slight lightweight of a girl forgot about it which made the dress adjusting more of Emilio’s responsibility. It was getting increasingly difficult as she was stumbling around and clinging onto his neck like a koala and sooner than later both simply let it go.

The later the night got, the closer the two got. Florence couldn’t keep her hands off of the boy in front of her, staining his jaw and neck in red lipstick prints, fingernails digging into his leather jacket to keep him close. She could feel his hands on her hips, holding her against his warm body, each movement sending tingles down her intoxicated limbs. The space between them was almost non-existent, Emilio’s hot breath on her neck making her turn to kiss him. He groaned lowly into her mouth, tugging her in by the limited material at her waist.

Daniel and Aidan could see the smudges of her red dress through the crowd from where they sat at the bar.

“Still think I’m an idiot?” Daniel hiccupped, ruffling a hand through his hair, messing it up.

“Yeah.” Aidan sighed, slapping a hand to his best friend’s shoulder. “But you’re clearly hurt so...I can’t blame you.”

“And I absolutely destroyed her in the process to mask my tiny bit of jealousy.” Daniel frowned, slumping into his arms onto the bar top.

“The DiCaprio twins are a force to be reckoned with, Dan.” Aidan mumbled, taking a long sip of his beer, his old memories of dating Callum back in 12th grade flashing through his mind. “They bring with them nothing but bad luck and fucking heartbreak.”

Daniel hummed in response, watching as Emilio left for the bathroom, leaving Florence to her own devices in the club. Prying eyes from around the room fell to the single girl in the short dress. Daniel looked back to Aidan as he continued,

“They lure you in with their good looks and shy-kid-next-door charm and then destroy every piece of your already fragile heart and leave it to rot after you give them everything you had.” Aidan said through his teeth.

Daniel sat back up straight in his chair and took a deep breath. He rubbed his eye with his fist.

“Either you go chase them down and convince yourself that their broken, money disguised childhood is a solid excuse for their lack of emotional availability or, you do what I did, and watch them leave and try to let it all go to only be met with constant regret and a hole in your chest for the rest of your life.”

Daniel simply blinked at his distraught friend. Aidan sighed, taking a long sip from his can again. The two boys fell into silence.

“Fuck this.” Daniel breathed, downing the last sip of his drink before getting up from the bar. The room spun as soon as he stood up but he forced himself to walk away from Aidan’s depressive spiral.

Florence kept herself swaying to the music during Emilio’s short absence; whether it was from her drunk state or the actual music, it didn’t matter.

The hands sliding around her waist made her smile, leaning back into the familiar touch. In any other state of mind, she would have noticed the difference in body type but she was drunk and full of bliss that it didn’t come to mind. His hair was just as soft to her fingers as her arms raised behind her, finally falling to his wrists as her body moved by itself to the music blasting loudly through the club. The rough denim jacket was no where close to the feeling of Emilio’s high end leather but she was focused on bringing his hands to her hips, pushing back into his body. Florence let the messy beat of the music move her ungracefully, the alcohol in her system pushing his hand to her inner thigh under the material of her short skirt, leaning her head back to his shoulder, her eyes closed. Her hand raised to the side of his face, fingers tangling themselves gently in his soft hair before pulling him in for a messy kiss. The angle was terrible as her back was to his front but the two drunk teenagers kissed like their life depended on it. Her tongue forced its way into his mouth, tasting the bitter taste of alcohol on his breath. It wasn’t until Florence turned around, pulled him into her by the collar of his jacket, and brought his bottom lip between her two that she sensed the difference.

Her eyes opened slowly and she pulled back to be met with Daniel’s stunned gaze, his cheeks pink from the alcohol and his blue eyes filled with desire. For some reason, whether it was the emotion of him even wanting to go near her for the first time in a while, or the serious amount of alcohol in her veins, she grabbed the back of his neck and kissed him hungrily again. Her arms fell around his shoulders, holding him against her. Daniel’s mind could hardly keep up with what was happening, the loud music fuzzy to his ears and the movements of the girl in front of him fast and clumsy. The moment was broken by some stranger stumbling into them, pouring their entire drink over the two. Florence shrieked at the cold liquid hitting her warm skin before bursting into giggles. Daniel gave the guy a shove away before looking down at the mess over the two of them.

Florence grabbed the open edge of Daniel’s denim jacket and pulled him through the crowd. The room spun behind them as the two drunk teenagers stumbled through the crowd to the stairs. Stairs posed a new challenge but they made it to the top unharmed, pushing past the security guard, and into the private room. Daniel was pushed backwards onto one of the couches and Florence fell on top of him, her mouth meeting his again. She sat over his lap, one leg on either side, making her short dress ride up dangerously high.

Sober Daniel was a shy boy, soft spoken and a polite sweetheart. Drunk Daniel, although completely inexperienced of anything they were doing, let his hands rest under the fabric of her dress, pushing it up more. It was clear that her underwear was on show to whoever might have walked in, but neither cared. Florence switched to peppering sloppy drunk kisses down to his neck before sucking a red mark into his milky skin. Daniel’s shaky groan filling the empty room, fingers pressing into the flesh of her lower hips. Florence slid off his lap to sit beside him, one arm around his shoulders and her other hand holding his face close to hers, meeting their lips again. His hands fell to her thighs innocently.

The sound of the door handle turning made the two separate quickly, dropping their hands from each other. The simple action turned their questionable position into simply friendly.

Emilio smiled at them from the doorway, “Are you guys making up finally?”

Florence discreetly wiped her mouth with the back of her hand, smudging her worn lipstick more than it already was. She let out a small giggle.

Daniel’s mind spun dangerously fast, like the room was on an axis. His drunk mind tried to piece together what Emilio’s simple sentence meant, pressing a hand to his temple. He felt his stomach turn and he bent over the side of the couch and vomited onto the carpet.

“Fucking hell.” Emilio sighed, holding himself up against the doorframe. He turned to find someone who could help somehow.

Daniel sat back and wiped his mouth with his hand, the remanence of Florence’s red lipstick transferring to his palm.

“I’m bleeding!” Daniel gasped.

“Shh.” Florence giggled, pointing to her lips. Daniel blinked at her before he burped lightly and bent over to throw up again onto the floor.

“Fuck, Daniel!” Corbyn came bursting into the room, setting his drink on the buffet table before grabbing his best friend by the arm, pulling him to his feet. The boy stumbled, falling weakly against Corbyn, dragging his arm over his mouth again. The boy looked like an absolute mess with the beer stain down the front of his jacket and his hair sticking up in all sorts of random directions.

Zach and Jack came into the room as Corbyn was pulling Daniel out and towards the bathroom. His heaving could be heard down the hall.

“He can never handle his alcohol.” Jack tisked.

“What a loser.” Zach set his hands dramatically on his waist and the two burst into laughter.

Aidan appeared in the doorway too, “We have to go. They’re kicking us out thanks to Daniel.”

“He ruins everything.” Florence slurred, falling backwards onto the couch, her dress still up around her bellybutton.

“Woah!” Zach, Jack, and Aidan smacked their hands over their eyes and turned away.

Emilio, who was sober enough to be aware of their surroundings, walked over to tug her dress back into place and then scooped her up.

The group reassembled on the sidewalk outside the club, all minus Jonah who had gone off with the girl he had met earlier. Daniel was leaning helplessly against Corbyn’s shoulder, barely able to even keep himself upright. It was nearing 1am when their two taxis pulled up to the curb. Florence, Emilio, Zach, and Jack got into one, leaving Aidan and Corbyn to watch Daniel in the other.

Arriving back at the house, Florence and Zach were asleep on Jack’s shoulders, their arms wrapped around his middle. Emilio paid the driver and helped Jack get the two half asleep drunks into the house. Zach laughed to himself the entire way up to the loft, Jack grumbling the entire way behind him. Corbyn and Aidan got Daniel to bed after the boy had thrown up again on the front lawn. Aidan set a glass of water on his nightstand for him when he woke up.

Florence and Emilio were directed to Jonah’s room for the night since he was gone. Florence spread herself out on the queen size bed, mumbling something about Jonah which sounded more like ‘Jehovah’ and sleeping on a cloud. Emilio got her out of her dress and into a t-shirt and pyjama pants that Corbyn lent them before getting her to finally stay on one side of the bed. Emilio passed out fast, gentle snores filling the now quiet house. 

Florence, still extremely buzzed, slid out of bed and started down the hallway, the floorboards creaking beneath her feet and her hand gliding over the wall to keep her balanced. She hummed to herself as she opened the door to Daniel’s room and closed it again behind her. 

His form was curled up under the sheets at the far side of the bed from the door. Florence climbed up next to him, resting her hands on his arm, making the half asleep boy flinch tiredly. He smelt of old beer and mint toothpaste, wearing only his underwear and the black t-shirt he had on under his jacket. 

He blinked his eyes open slowly, his drunk mind trying to focus on the figure beside him just as she leaned down to kiss him.

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten #455

Top Ten Comedy Sidekicks

Ha, LOL, ROFL, guffaw, snort. Comedy, eh? You’ve got to love it, unless you somehow fall through a timewarp into a late-seventies working men’s club in Blackburn and you find yourself choking to death on second-hand smoke, mother-in-law jokes, and a simmering undercurrent of racist violence. Good times!

Anyway, it’s fairly common that even in the most serious of narratives and with the most serious of protagonists, we need a little chuckle very now and again (nobody tell Zack Snyder – actually, no, scratch that, somebody definitely tell Zack Snyder). It lightens the load, makes the world more nuanced and realistic, and even makes the truly dark moments stand out all the stronger. Most films have a bit of a joke every once in a while (and, of course, Shakespeare’s tragedies are full of comic characters or bits of business), and one very common trope is the Comedy Sidekick.

What is a Comedy Sidekick? Well, it’s a supporting character who offers comic relief, basically. sometimes this can be obviously discernible – Luis in Ant-Man, for example, may function as a plot engine from time to time, but has little in the way of actual character development and is mostly there to be funny whilst the heroes do hero stuff. Sometimes it’s harder to define; I mean, are either of the Blues Brothers a comedy sidekick? Arguably Jake is the lead and Elwood is a bit more of a “turn” (he’s almost eternally deadpan and unemotional), but I’d never say one was inherently funnier or “straighter” than the other. And the you get onto films like Aladdin: sure, Aladdin himself is obviously the protagonist, and there’s an argument to be made that the Genie is a comic relief supporting character, but I feel in this case he’s far too integral to the plot, played by a significantly more famous actor, and really just dominates the film to the extent that he becomes the de facto lead (see also: Captain Jack Sparrow). Again, in Men in Black, Will Smith’s J is clearly the “funny” one, but Smith is also the bigger star and the audience entry point; plus, Tommy Lee Jones is hilarious as the deadpan K. So it’s not as simple as it may first appear.

Anyway, the ten in this list are ones I define as definitely being supporting characters. They may be big characters, in terms of plot or development, but they’re definitely there in support of another protagonist. And whilst they may be fully-rounded characters with their own arcs, their primary function is to be funny; they’re the ones who deliver the comedy lines back to the main character, or crack a joke at the end of a serious bit.

Right, I think that’s my usual ridiculous caveats out of the way. Now let’s make ‘em laugh.

Baldrick (Tony Robinson, Blackadder series, 1983-99): Baldrick is one of the supreme comic idiots in all of fiction. Serving as a perfect foil to Blackadder, he is not only supremely stupid but also his niceness and naiveté serves to undercut his master’s wickedness; plus his idiocy is often the undoing of Blackadder’s villainous plans. But he is also charmingly fully-rounded, oblivious to his own stupidity, possessed of “cunning plans”, and with a great love of turnips. A phenomenal turn from Robinson.

Sir John Falstaff (various plays by William Shakespeare, from 1597): is it cheating to include as significant and iconic a literary figure as Falstaff? Feels a bit like it, especially as he's practically a lead (and, indeed, becomes one in Merry Wives). But really he’s the archetype: a supremely vain and self-serving comic foil, but one with vast hidden depths as he’s keenly aware of his own frailties and the inevitable end of his good times with Prince Hal.

Father Dougal McGuire (Ardal O’Hanlon, Father Ted 1995-98): in many ways he’s a slightly watered-down version of Baldrick’s comic idiot; but Dougal is, if anything, even stupider, and less self-aware. He’s like a perfect idiot, a beautiful naïve fool, a supreme man-child with his Masters of the Universe duvet. And he’s divine, just incredibly hilarious throughout; and, like Baldrick, serves as the perfect foil for his more duplicitous and cynical elder.

Donkey (Eddie Murphy, Shrek, 2001): animated sidekicks are very often the comic relief, and I’d argue that Murphy’s Donkey is as good as they come. I actually think Murphy’s prior turn as Mushu in Mulan is probably the better character, but Donkey is just a comic force of nature, a creature who exists only to make everything dafter and funnier. It allowed Murphy a chance to go all-out in a way he hadn’t on screen for quite some time, and it was something we’d rarely seen in animation (arguably only Robin Williams’ Genie is in the same ballpark). Plus, he actually is a good friend to Shrek, bringing out his better nature. Well done, Eddie!

Danny Butterman (Nick Frost, Hot Fuzz, 2007): another of those characters who really skirts the edges of “supporting comic relief” and is really a deuteragonist. But I feel like most of Frost’s characters in his partnerships with Simon Pegg are, essentially, supportive; Pegg is almost always the lead. In this film, despite Danny having some great development and functioning almost as a romantic partner for Pegg’s Nick Angel, he’s usually presented as a beautiful comic foil, his folksy, slobby demeanour contrasting perfectly with Angel’s straitlaced professionalism. And – for the second film in a row – he gets a tremendous C-bomb.

Luis (Michael Peña, Ant-Man, 2015): another comic fool, Luis is the silly, charming, endearing, loveable thorn in the side of Paul Rudd’s Scott Lang. He’s daft, yeah, and comes across as a bit dim, but his permanently-smiling demeanour means we just keep on loving him, even when we can see how annoying he would be. but what cements his position is his rapid-fire OTT explanations, and how the movie presents them; pieces of comedic joy in the MCU.

Cosmo Brown (Donald O’Connor, Singin’ in the Rain, 1952): Singin’ is one of those great Golden Age movies full of witty dialogue (as well as great songs, natch), and by its nature Gene Kelly is the lead and therefore straight man, whereas O’Connor’s Cosmo can be wackier and funnier, and in doing so get to the truth of what his friend is feeling. But what really gets him in this list is his performance of “Make ‘Em Laugh”, running up walls like he’s in The Matrix or something, and feeling like a Bugs Bunny cartoon brought to life.

Silent Bob (Kevin Smith, View Askiewniverse, from 1994): I guess you could argue that both Bob and his less-silent colleague Jay are, as a twosome, the comedy sidekicks in whichever films they’re in (apart from the two they headline, I guess); but if you take the pair on their own, I’d say Bob is the comic of the duo. Yeah, it’s Jay who’s the mile-a-minute loudmouth, cracking jokes and being explosively filthy. But who really gets the laughs? For my money it’s Smith’s perfectly-judged expressions, punctuating the pomposity or reinforcing the eccentricity of whatever Jay’s on about. And then every now and again he gets to speak, and delivers a great one-liner (“no ticket!”) or serious, heartfelt monologue (cf. Chasing Amy).

Semmi (Arsenio Hall, Coming to America, 1988): Semmi is supposed to be a loyal and devoted servant to Prince Akeem, and he is, I guess; but he’s also a true friend. Akeem’s quest to find love in New York is genuine, and despite the film’s high joke quantity, Eddie Murphy has to be relatively restrained in his lead role. Hall’s Semmi, on the other hand, gets to be acerbic, throwing shade and barbs at his lord, questing their quest and seeking his own share of wealth and, well, women. And we all love his line “you sweat from a baboon’s balls”.

Dory (Ellen DeGeneres, Finding Nemo, 2003): as discussed above, comedy cartoon sidekicks are a cinematic staple. They’re not often female, however, and even more rare is a female character who gets to be both funnier and seemingly dumber/goofier than the lead. Of course, Dory is full of pathos, a borderline tragic character whose chronic memory loss has a dreadful impact on her day-to-day life. It’s her sunny optimism (“just keep swimming!”) that makes her endearing more than her humour, however; and, of course, it’s this optimism that begins to chip away at Marlin’s (Albert Brooks’) flinty suit of armour. Funny, warm, makes our hero a better person, but can be a little bit sad – perfect comedy sidekick.

There are two that I’m annoyed that I couldn’t fit in so I'll mention them here: Carrie Fisher in When Harry Met Sally and Danny Kaye in White Christmas. In the former case, whilst Fisher’s Marie is hilarious throughout, and definitely comic relief when put alongside the relatively straight Sally, the fact that everyone, really, gets a lot of funny lines in what is a consistently funny film kinda knocked her down the rankings a little bit, even though I feel bad about it, because everything is always better if Carrie FIsher is in it, including these lists. Kaye’s Phil Davis in White Christmas absolutely steals that film from Bing Crosby, with fast-paced witty wordplay and some supreme physical comedy, and the running gag about how he saved the life of Crosby’s Bob Wallace is golden. But, I dunno, he just kept slipping down the list, despite being my favourite thing in that film. Sorry, Danny.

[aion-rsa]

“God God – Whose Hand Was I Holding?”: the Scariest Sentences Ever Written, Selected by Top Horror Authors

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Many people have a very intimate relationship with books. And horror books can get under your skin like no other medium, whether you’re peering at a scary novel under the covers as a youngster or devouring new or classic horror as a grown up. Good horror writing sticks with you. 

For Halloween we’ve attempted to round up some of the scariest sentences ever written – and who better to ask for their recommendations than some of the finest horror writers and editors around? We asked some of our favourite experts to tell us the line that scared them most and why. Any suggestions of your own? Let us know in the comments.

To Serve Man by Damon Knight

Scariest sentence: “It’s a cookbook,” he said.

Is there a better whammy of an end line than this? Ten to one you’ll know the story that precedes it: Seemingly benevolent aliens, the Kanamit, arrive on earth, promising peace and prosperity. The aliens are as good as their word, and start whisking “lucky” humans off to their planet for a “ten year exchange programme”. A U.N translator, who (rightly) thinks this is all too good to be true, sets about translating the aliens’ favourite book, which, from its title, “To Serve Man,” is assumed to be an innocent handbook. It ain’t (see the last line). The story and its funny/bleak ending has haunted me since I first read it as a ten-year-old, way too young to consider that it could be read as an allegory about the horrors of colonialism. Back then all I could think about were the people the Kanamit had lured aboard their ships, unaware that they were destined for the table (or the Kanamit version of Masterchef). It still gives me chills. – Sarah Lotz author of Missing Person out now from Hodder. 

I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream by Harlan Ellison

Scariest sentence: “I have no mouth. And I must scream.”

If I tell you the name of this Harlan Ellison story, it’ll give away the last line… “I have no mouth. And I must scream.” I remember when I first read that ending, only to find myself caught in a loop where those two sentences kept echoing through my head. Reading it again right now, it’s still hard not to pinch my lips as tightly together as possible and try giving the ol’ lungs a good bellow. Still sends shivers down my spine. – Clay McLeod Chapman, author of The Remaking, out now from Quirk Books

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Movies

How Hulu’s Books of Blood Movie Taps The Mind of Clive Barker

By Don Kaye

Cabal by Clive Barker

Scariest Sentence: “She knew what men afraid, and afraid of their fear, were capable of.“

According to some criminologists, the root cause of many violent acts isn’t anger but fear. Fear of rejection, of failure, of abandonment, of loss. In this early novel by Barker, the link between fear and violence is only subtly hinted at–which makes it all the more frightening. He alludes to the heroine’s personal history with violent men, leaving the reader to fill in the blanks. – Andrew Schaffer, author of Secret Santa, out 10 November from Quirk Books 

The Sibling by Adam Hall

Scariest sentence: “He’s put the clown in her room,” Lorraine said quietly.

As a species, our goal is to keep clowns out of our bedrooms and living spaces and yet here’s some monster deliberately inserting a clown into someone’s room, ignoring the fact that since at least the dawn of time clowns have been mankind’s natural predator. The resigned tone of that “quietly” really drives home the horror because clearly this is not the first time. – Grady Hendrix.

Squelch, John Halkn

Scariest sentence: “It still doesn’t make sense to me. Moths attack sweaters and fly around light bulbs. They don’t devour humans.”

It doesn’t make sense to me, either, but if moths have stopped attacking our clothing and started attacking our bodies then count me out. I’m done. – Grady Hendrix.

Night of the Crabs by Guy N. Smith

Scariest sentence:“What a beautiful night,” Pat remarked, as they passed alongside the barbed-wire fence which enclosed War Department property. “If only we didn’t have to worry about giant crabs.”

Sometimes you just wish you lived in a simpler world. – Grady Hendrix.

The Farm by Richard Haigh

Scariest sentence: “The pigs,” then her control snapped. “Look, they’re coming out,” she shrieked. “Oh, sweet Christ. The pigs!!”

Every time I leave the safety of New York City I fully expect this to be the last sentence I hear as I am devoured by angry livestock. – Grady Hendrix, author of The Final Girl Support Group out July 2021 from Titan Books

The Girl Next Door by Jack Ketchum

Scariest sentence: “I’m not going to tell you about this. I refuse to.”

That’s half of chapter 42 from Jack Ketchum’s The Girl Next Door. And The Girl Next Door is a novel that, just as Joe R. Lansdale says at the head of his story “The Night They Missed the Horror Show,” doesn’t flinch. So, if the narrator is looking back to having seen something that even he can’t put on the page, then . . . how bad must it be, right? I’ve talked to other readers of this novel and they’ve told me about chapter 42 as if the narrator actually fleshes it all out for us, and they (myself as well) all flinch as if traumatized from having had to read those words. Except they never did read the words of what actually happened. But that’s Jack Ketchum, for you. He doesn’t need to actually say it on the page to get it into our head. Worse, this is a chapter that never leaves you, either. Worse than that, you kind of become complicit just for reading it. – Stephen Graham Jones author of The Only Good Indians, out now.

In the Hills, the Cities by Clive Barker

Scariest sentence: “In Popolac a kind of peace reigned. Instead of a frenzy of panic there was a numbness, a sheep-like acceptance of the world as it was. Locked in their positions, strapped, roped and harnessed to each other in a living system that allowed for no single voice to be louder than any other, nor any back to labour less than its neighbour’s, they let an insane consensus replace the tranquil voice of reason.” 

As a much younger person, reading this story for the first time, I was overtaken by awe at the imagery; not unlike Mick who chooses to hitch a ride on the impossible doomed giant made of city denizens. Re-reading it now decades later, the story and these lines fill me with bone-deep dread. Like the referee/car thief and Mick’s lover Judd, I cannot bear to view the inevitable fall. – Paul Tremblay, author of Survivor Song, out now from Titan Books. 

Home Burial by Robert Frost

Scariest sentences: ”Don’t – don’t go.  Don’t carry it to someone else this time. Tell me about it if it’s something human.”

The line here that I consider scary is ‘Tell me about it if it’s something human.’ Because of the implication that people may carry within them things that are not human. In this case, I imagine the ‘it’ that may not be human to be something so deeply felt and instinctive that it is pre-language – and so pre-human, almost. Something primordial that requires translation or mediation – and perhaps in that, change or diminishment – in order to be sensible to another sentient being. It is the suggestion that maybe our most fundamental aspects or thoughts – our most important feelings – cannot be properly communicated that is terrifying, to me. It makes me think of each person as a dark pool, with their lived experience and true feelings becoming manifest at the bottom, and the communication of these things to others being only what is visible through the surface of the water, from above.

As much as I do believe that all communication is imperfect, and that it is difficult for people to know each other truly, I take comfort from two things – one is love, which is, I think, a kind of deep, fundamental knowing and acceptance of each other. The other is fiction, which (in my opinion) is often an attempt at translating ideas and feelings that, coming from our deepest places, we don’t otherwise have the language for. – Tom Fletcher, author The Witch Bottle, out 12 November from Jo Fletcher Books.

The Talisman by Stephen King and Peter Straub

Scariest sentence: “You’re the herd now, Jacky.” 

I read King & Straub’s The Talisman when I was 15, at a time in my life when I’d said goodbye to one bunch of friends and hello to another, and the friendship between Jack Sawyer and his werewolf friend Wolf resonated strongly with me. In Wolf’s culture werewolves are farmers and fiercely protective of their herds who they protect by locking themselves away every month. The problem is that Jack and Wolf are on the run and Wolf’s change is coming upon him, and there’s nowhere to shut Wolf away. So when Wolf turns to Jack with blazing eyes and says this, it’s simultaneously a promise of protection (‘I will die for you’) but also a warning (‘I will tear you to pieces’). The chill with which Jack realises that his best friend loves him but will probably kill him anyway has stayed with me ever since. – James Brogden, author of Bone Harvest, out now from Titan Books

Read more

Movies

I Am Legend: Why Can’t Matheson’s Masterpiece be Done Justice on Film?

By Dan Hajducky

I Am Legend by Richard Matheson

Scariest sentence: “The watch had stopped”

I think a lot of us can relate to the feeling of getting caught up in our work and letting the hours pass us by without much thought. In the case of Robert Neville, the central figure in Richard Matheson’s seminal I Am Legend, getting lost in the hours is the most horrific thing he could possibly do. The simple four-word-sentence that has scared me more than any other in all my days of reading is “The watch had stopped.” If you’ve read the story, I’m sure you remember how those words burned into you. – Rachel Autumn Deering, editor of Hex Life, out in paperback from Titan Books on November 10 2020

One for the Road by Stephen King

Scariest sentence: “And I think she’s still waiting for her good-night kiss.”

I’m not easily scared, but occasionally I get a real chill up my spine. Shirley Jackson did that with the last line of The Haunting of Hill House. But if we’re talking about one line that lingers, that still makes me remember the way it felt the very first time I read it, I have to go with the last line in Stephen King’s short story “One for the Road,” from his collection Night Shift. It’s a vampire story, a sequel to ’Salem’s Lot, about a family whose car is trapped in a blizzard on the outskirts of a town plagued by vampires. That last line is “And I think she’s still waiting for her good-night kiss.” There, I just felt it again. That shiver. All these years later, it still works on me. – Christopher Golden, editor of Hex Life, out in paperback from Titan Books on November 10 2020

The New Mother by Lucy Clifford

Scariest sentence: “Now and then, when the darkness has fallen and the night is still, hand in hand Blue-Eyes and the Turkey creep up near to the home in which they once were so happy, and with beating hearts they watch and listen; sometimes a blinding flash comes through the window, and they know it is the light from the new mother’s glass eyes, or they hear a strange muffled noise, and they know it is the sound of her wooden tail as she drags it along the floor.”

The scariest sentence ever is from The New Mother by Lucy Clifford. The strange tone of the writing, the situation in the story and the fact that the new mother is not in any way human… – David Quantick, author of Night Train, out now from Titan Books 

The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson 

Scariest sentence: “God God! Whose hand was I holding?” 

This scene perfectly conjures the feeling of being afraid in the night. Distance, time, sound – all the natural laws of the daylight world grow slippery and loosen. It’s a unique sensation – no other fear has the visceral, unhinged quality of cold terror in the dark. Shirley Jackson puts all of this on the page – she takes Eleanor and the reader into that same heightened, accelerated state, she makes our hearts race, she makes us feel alone, disoriented, lost in the night with only a friend’s hand to cling to. And then she saves us – the lights come on, our heart rate slows, and the rational world seems to settle into its proper channel again. And at last Eleanor sees: the friend whose comforting hand she held in the dark has been on the other side of the room all along. – Catriona Ward is the author of The Last House on Needless Street out 18th March 2021 from Viper Books 

Read more

TV

The Haunting Of Hill House: How the Extraordinary Episode 6 was Made

By Louisa Mellor

The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson

Scariest sentence: “God god – whose hand was I holding?”

It’s from a scene about two-thirds of the way through the novel. Eleanor and Theodora go to sleep in their adjacent beds in one of the many bedrooms in Hill House. They sleep with the lights on because of previous frightening incidents. But Eleanor wakes in the night to find the room plunged in darkness, and hears an eerie voice muttering from the next room. The darkness and the frightening sounds go on endlessly, and Eleanor is filled with a mounting sense of dread. She reaches out blindly for Theodora’s hand and holds on tight.

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But when the lights finally come back on, Theodora is several feet away, sitting up in her own bed, too far away for Eleanor to have touched her. So the hand she was holding belonged to someone or something else. It’s a brilliantly oblique bit of horror – the realisation that the monster was right alongside you, inside your guard – and every adaptation of the novel references it in some form or other. But I don’t think you can beat Jackson’s chilling, deadpan prose. – Mike Carey author of The Trials of Koli, out now from Orbit Books

Read more

Books

Who Was The Haunting of Hill House Author Shirley Jackson?

By Don Kaye

The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson 

Scariest sentence: “No live organism can continue for long to exist sanely under conditions of absolute reality; even larks and katydids are supposed, by some, to dream. Hill House, not sane, stood by itself against its hills, holding darkness within; it had stood for eighty years and might stand for eighty more. Within, walls continued upright, bricks met neatly, floors were firm, and doors were sensibly shut; silence lay steadily against the wood and stone of Hill House, and whatever walked there, walked alone.” 

I’ll be surprised if no one else has picked these sentences, although maybe not, because I’m blatantly cheating for choosing the entire first paragraph of The Haunting of Hill House. It is a classic of looming dread, and it’s probably generated more commentary and criticism than any other first paragraph in a horror novel. I love it. – Ellen Datlow, editor of the Best Horror of the Year annual series.

A Head Full of Ghosts by Paul Tremblay

Scariest sentence: “It was so dark it was like nothing was there in the room but us. Only the nothing was actually something because it filled my eyes and lungs and it sat on my shoulders.”

Paul Tremblay perfectly captures our universal fear of the dark in these two lines from A Head Full of Ghosts. That made the flesh on my skull crawl when I read it. The wording is simple but so effective: in one, two, three increasingly creepy instances Paul transforms what’s simply darkness into the tangible, the intimately dangerous… as darkness tends to do. – Thomas Olde Heuvalt, author Hex and Echo, forthcoming from Nightfire in 2021

Naked Lunch by William S. Burroughs

Scariest sentence: The Black Meat is like a tainted cheese, overpoweringly delicious and nauseating so that the eaters eat and vomit and eat again until they fall exhausted.

I read Naked Lunch in high school and it was a mind-destroyer. Thankfully, it is also a mind rebuilder. You can turn to any page and find sentences that bewildered, disoriented, horrified, and excited me. So that’s exactly what I just did: I opened the book randomly to page 55 and found one. Disgusting, delightful decadence! – Daniel Kraus, coauthor with George A. Romero of The Living Dead, out now from Tor Books.

The Masque of the Red Death by Edgar Allan Poe

Scariest sentence: “And Darkness and Decay and the Red Death held illimitable dominion over all.“

It’s ‘illimitable’ that does it for me, though the capitalisations and the against-the-advice-of-grammarians superfluous first and second usages of ‘and’ add quite a bit.  That first ‘And’ – the one your teacher told you not to start a sentence with – is a pointed touch and does a lot of work, indicating that all the bad stuff in the rest of the sentence is a consequence of what’s gone before in the story … which, this season, seems like the most pointed tale of mystery and imagination ever written. – Kim Newman author Anno Dracula 1999 Daikaiju out now from Titan Books.

The Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson

Scariest sentence: “In the unending, crashing second before the car hurled into the tree she thought clearly, Why am I doing this?  Why am I doing this?  Why don’t they stop me?” 

Discussions of the prose of Shirley Jackson’s monumental The Haunting of Hill House tend to focus on its famous opening paragraph.  Certainly the beginnings of both the novel’s first and second chapters offer a wealth of riches for scholarly consideration, rhetorical analysis.  Yet it’s this long sentence from the novel’s second-to-last paragraph that comes to mind if I’m asked to name the most frightening line in the book.  Indeed, it seems to me one of the most frightening sentences of any novel or story I’ve read.  Obviously, there are lines whose immediate impact is greater, which have a more substantial visceral effect (Clive Barker’s fiction is rife with these).  But I’m not sure any echo in quite the same way.  At this moment in Jackson’s narrative, Eleanor Vance is being made to leave Hill House, the dwelling with whose structure her personality has become entangled and confused.  Seemingly unwilling to be separated from the place, she steers her car straight toward an enormous tree at a curve in the driveway and steps on the gas.  “I am really doing it,” she thinks, “I am doing this all by myself, now, at last.”  This would be an awful enough end for Jackson’s protagonist, but with the sentence that follows and finishes the paragraph, she gives the screw a final, diabolical turn.  Eleanor experiences a moment of clarity, which tells us that her thoughts of just a line before were not clear.  She is not accelerating toward the tree of her own volition—or, not only of her own volition.  Something else is at play here, some other factor.  Is it the “whatever” Jackson has described walking in Hill House, the unspecified, (possibly) supernatural force (which might be any one of a number of ghosts, or an aggregate of those ghosts, or the house itself, brought to occult life by the peculiarities of its design)?  Or is it some submerged part of Eleanor—guilt at her role in her mother’s death, or anger at her expulsion from the group brought to Hill House to study it?  She doesn’t know, and she is trapped in her unknowing, as the final instant of her life stretches on and on, “unending.”  Her ultimate motivation obscure to her, all she can do is wonder why no one is stopping her.  With hideous irony, the power, the control Eleanor was celebrating a moment prior turns on her, her freedom becoming the freedom of death.  The line passes as quickly as the crash it describes, and in its speed, it’s easy to miss everything going on it.  To say it’s another example of Jackson’s skill as a writer feels somehow inadequate, as it doesn’t get at the way the sentence braids claustrophobia, terror, and confusion.  It’s the kind of writing that haunts you in quiet moments, long after flashier, louder lines have faded into silence.  It’s the kind of writing that reminds you of the horror story’s particular power, its reach and its resonance. – John Langan, author of The Fisherman, out now.

Pet Sematary by Stephen King

Scariest sentence: “Sometimes dead is better.”

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Nobody says this line better than that guy in the first Pet Sematary movie who used to play Herman Munster. Although John Lithgow did his best. King struck on an age-old wisdom when he showed us the folly of trying to bring people back once they’re gone. Just as WW. Jacobs did in The Monkey’s Paw and Shelley demonstrated (albeit piecemeal) in Frankenstein. You’ve got to be careful what you wish for. Sometimes, dead really is better, and far less likely to come back and stab you to death with a scalpel. C.S. O’Cinneide is the author of Petra’s Ghost, out now from Titan Books.

Pet Sematary by Stephen King

Scariest sentence: “Darling,” it said

This line has to be read in the context of an entire, brilliant novel that went before. It’s really not something I want to give away, because of spoilers, but if you’ve read this one, even hearing the final line again should send a shiver through you. The writer was at the top of his game – and that’s saying something – and it remains his most terrifying novel.  Here’s the line: “Darling,” it said. – Tim Lebbon, author of Eden, out now from Titan Books 

The post “God God – Whose Hand Was I Holding?”: the Scariest Sentences Ever Written, Selected by Top Horror Authors appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/31T5a7G

[safyresky]

Crystal Springs Chapter 17: Now on ao3!

THAR SHE BLOWS!

Chapter 17: Elemental Ball

Heart-to-hearts are had as Winter preps for the annual Winter Market and decides to bring Jack along with her this year. Back at the North Pole, a deal is struck as Bernard gives Santa a crash course in Dome stuff.

And also, Jack plays elemental ball.

I just kinda liked the summary w/out that bit, though the ao3 summary still has it! :) I may change this one, it's still not hitting but hey, what're you gonna do, right? Summaries are HARD.

THIS chapter features the very first scene ever thought of for the story! And some fun sibling shenanigans but first, heart-to-hearts, including one of my FAVOURITES which I will have to share as THE snippet for y'all RIGHT NOW, IMMEDIATELY:

"Regardless, I should've checked in on you after Winter split us up. We should've looked after you that day, too. I'm sorry about that."

"Well, better late than never," Jack joked with a sly grin, Blaise laughing. "I do appreciate the apology. But if I'm being honest? I don't think you two would've been able to stop me from leaving. Even if you had managed to talk to me the way we are now, I wouldn't have stayed." "I bet there was a way we could've," Blaise said with a soft smile. "This time, I'll do it right. We will, once you and your mom talk." "That's the spirit," Jack said with a nod, finishing off his food.. "Thanks for all of this, Dad. I appreciate the level headed discussion." "Not as much as I do," Blaise said. "I'm getting too old for elemental blowouts," he added, weary. "Yeah, well, growing up, and then getting a curse broken and a frozen heart thawed in the same night does that to a guy. And I'm getting up there in age too," Jack admitted. "I'm sorry for being so pushy about the curse stuff yesterday." "You were still hurting, son! I'm glad you pushed. It cleared the stage for this," Blaise said, gesturing to the two of them seated at the table, plates empty, hearts happy. "You had a point. And you have a right to feel the way you do. It gave me a little kick in the ass, too. And I'm sure there'll be plenty more moments like this," Blaise added, as a swath of packing snow suddenly hit the glass of the sliding door with a hefty thunk, startling Jack out of his seat. "Okay, really, what the heck is going on out there?" Jack asked, his heart racing as he watched the snow slowly slide down the glass, horrible squeaking noises included. "Why don't you come see for yourself?" Blaise stood up, hair reigniting as he pushed in his chair. The hit had not fazed him in the slightest; he opened the sliding door, gesturing Jack through. "You are going to love this."

And so, dear readers, are you! See for yourself what shenanigans are brewing in the Frost's backyard on ao3 HERE!

Feel like taking it from the top! Read the Prologue: An Encounter HERE on ao3 and HERE on ff dot net. Story summary below the cut!

It’s been almost a year since Jack Frost thawed and things are looking…well, not so great. Jack’s powers are seemingly gone. Without them, the Dome that keeps the North Pole safe from the cold and its magic controlled is melting, putting everything and everyone magical at risk.

Unable to hide his power shortage any longer, Jack is forced to admit the truth. Thankfully, there is a solution: enacting the Legate Law, bringing Jack and the sister that he hurt so many centuries ago back together again. But when Jacqueline starts experiencing destructive blackouts, the pair are forced to head back home to Crystal Springs, bringing Jack face to face with the rest of the family.

Needless to say, between getting his powers back, helping his sister figure out what in the FROST those blackouts even were, reconciling with his parents, meeting the two even younger siblings he didn’t even KNOW he had, NOT TO MENTION the ancient threat that’s had it out for the ENTIRE Frost family finally making a move?

Saving Christmas (regrettably) is looking to be a little bit…complicated.

[takaraphoenix]

Disney for the ask game

Thanks for playing! I’m gonna go ahead and assume animated movies only. xD”

Top 5 favourite characters: Aurora, Fa Mulan, Flynn Rider, Hades, Hiro Hamada

Other characters you like: Marie (Aristocats), Bagheera, Tod (The Fox and th Hound), Tinkerbell, Judy Hopps

Least favourite characters:E L S A

Otps: Maleficent/Aurora, Shere Khan/Bagheera, Moana Waialiki/Merida, Fa Mulan/Aurora, Copper/Tod (The Fox and the Hound), Eugene Fitzherbert/Rapunzel, Tarzan/Jane, Tiana/Charlotte LaBouff

Notps: Jack Frost/Elsa, Nick Wilde/Judy Hopps, honestly probably a lot of others too but nothing I can think of right now or may not even be aware of - though generally, I am very on board with canon Disney ships, surprisingly enough

Favourite friendships: Tiana and Charlotte are great, I love Bagheera and Baloo, Nick Wilde and Judy Hopps too!

Favourite family: Clearly the found family of Lilo & Stitch - Nani, Lilo, Stitch, David, Jumba and Pleakley!

Favourite episodes: mmmh doesn’t really apply here

Favourite season/book/movie: damn, you can’t just ask my favorite. When it comes to Disney movies, it’s more of a tie than a clear Top Five that can be sorted, because all are equally good to me, in different aspects. Sleeping Beauty, Mulan, Lilo & Stitch and Hercules

Favourite quotes:sooo not a quotes kinda gal

Best musical moment: ...why would you do this to me? *distressed sounds* Okay, so, this doesn’t ask best musical number but best musical moment. Now, do bear in mind that I’m German and watch these movies in German. So do not ask me what the English names of things are. But Hercules when Hercules had that moment of wanting to prove himself, like that song was the antheme of my childhood, I still feel that song vibrating in my heart. There are a whole lot of strong, good musical moments in the long history of Disney movies, but this one is just so very dear to me and speaks to me hard...

Moment that made you fangirl/boy the hardest: I MEAN SHIT CLEARLY WHEN ALL OF CHINA KNELT BEFORE MULAN LIKE, THAT IS THE BEST

When it really disappointed you:when they said “fuck creativity, gimme that nostalgia money” and dialed back on original movies in favor of lame shallow live-action remakes of animated classics YOU CAN STILL WATCH. You can LITERALLY just put that Cinderella in and watch it, no need for that horrendous remake (I swear, these fucking hyper-realistic mice with those gigantic cartoon eyes are terrifying and were a not good decision)

Saddest moment: Mufasa’s death, hands down

Most well done character death:...Mufasa’s death, hands down xD”

Favourite guest star: yeah no this is asking too much of me and let’s be real this is gonna be useless to y’all non-Germans even if I know the answer xD

Favourite cast member: seriously I am not good with voice actors and remembering names of those; actors, when I actually get to see faces, sure, but voice-actors...

Character you wish was still alive: SO MANY MOTHERS. Seriously, they killed off so many moms to have Single Dads take care of their daughters... -_-

One thing you hope really happens: I wished they would go back to making fairy tale adaptations. But... I mean ACTUAL adaptations. Not that shit they pulled with Frozen where they took the Snow Queen out of The Snow Queen and literally only kept that one around and changed EVERY SINGLE ASPECT of the story. And it’s not even the first offender; Tangled had barely anything to do with Rapunzel at all. Princess and the Frog was at least up-front about it with the book and the comparison. But let’s... let’s go back to when Disney actually adapted fairy tales and gave half a shit about said fairy tales? Because otherwise, you could just make ORIGINAL MOVIES! :D”““

Most shocking twist: uuuuuuuuuh I got nothing

When did you start watching/reading?: I mean... when I was a tiny kiddo? xD

Best animal/creature: Bagheera! *^*

Favourite location: Atlantica?

Trope you wish they would stop using: killed off mom :D”

One thing this show/book/film does better than others:I does great story-telling usually and it’s beautiful animation most of the time?

Funniest moments: there are a lot; I don’t really have a favorite

Couple you would like to see: I... I am past the point of wanting to see a gay Disney couple, tbh. They showed how little they care about the community and how cringey and offensive their version of ““representation”“ is so... I got nothing

Actor/Actress you want to join the cast: again; would be useless to you and I don’t really know anyway xD”

Favourite outfit: AURORA’S DRESS *^*

Favourite item: uuuhm Triton’s trident?

Do you own anything related to this show/book/film?: lol too many things, yes xD” I have a large variety of Disney figures! ^-^

What house/team/group/friendship group/family/race etc would you be in?: I would be a Flounder-like fearful sidekick xD

Most boring plotline: recent sequels - Incredibles 2 and Finding Dory - because old sequels sure were cringey and weird but shit happened. These new sequels are literally just the exact same shit reheated... =_=

Most laughably bad moment:Pocahontas II going “you know what this needs? This needs a sequel where she goes to England to fall in love with a whole different male character and forcibly try to be an English Lady!”... It was so cringey that the thought someone thought this was a good idea is downright funny??

Best flashback/flashfoward if any: Let’s translate that to prequel/sequel, okay? Then I’d go with Rescuers Down Under - I love that movie. The only case of “sequel is actually better than OG movie”

Most layered character: This may actually be asking too much, tbh. There are just too many characters to judge that...

Most one dimensional character: Probably a whole lot, considering how many characters there ARE...

Scariest moment: the whole entire fucking Nightmare Before Christmas. Damn that thing haunted me for months and I watched it for the first time when I was sixteen (...it’s mainly because stopmotion is my absolute Kryptonite...)

Grossest moment: Fart jokes

Best looking male: Eugene Fitzherbert? xD

Best looking female: Maleficent! *^*

Who you’re crushing on (if any): I mean. Maleficent. But please do note ANIMATED NOT THAT SHITTY CRAP REMAKE. Not because Angelina Joulie isn’t absolutely gorgeous but THEY DIDN’T EVEN GIVE HER GREEN SKIN

Favourite cast moment: Don’t know any of that ^^°

Favourite transportation: The flying carpet?

Most beautiful scene (scenery/shot wise): The opening of The Lion King is so incredibly stunning *^*

Unanswered question/continuity issue/plot error that bugs you:oh Frozen left me with a lot of those. But definitely not enough to put myself through that sequel and also that shit shoulda been explained in the first movie so there is that :D”

Best promo: ahahaha *weeping* when they claimed that Maleficent was going to take my favorite villainess and give her the Wicked treatment. You... You REALLY had me fooled there and got my cinema going money to see that pathetic excuse of a “woman was abused by man and turns evil” crap like holy shit this has nothing to do with Wicked get that away from me, Mal had SO MUCH potential and you did nothing with it ;-;

At what point did you fall in love with this show/book: I mean, as a little kid. Probably around The Lion King?

IN DEPTH FANDOM QUESTIONS

[kiki-wiccan]

 “Jack frost, hm? I can’t say I grew up with such tales.” He tilted his head, observing the way Kiki could reflect on her own childhood so fondly. If someone else were to utter the same words the wiccan had said, Stanislav would have brushed them off as nit-witted at best. Yet there was something about Kiki--perhaps his growing admiration--that resulted in him being much more lenient with her mannerisms.

         Stanislav focused on Kiki pulling out her phone, ignoring the urge to check his own. He would only fall into a pit of emails, and since Kiki had requested his company; he would only have to suffer through the rest of the night. The compulsion wasn’t as bad as it had been in the hospital, perhaps because he found himself invested in their conversations.

        “Yes, they were a favourite of mine.” His eyes narrowed as Kiki claimed his origin, and he gave a small nod. “Such a smart girl. What gave it away?” Though the last part was more sarcastic, he flashed a small smile. “You’re correct, Miss Kiki. Though I would have thought the name would’ve given it away, but I digress.”

               Having slipped into his own mind, having an internal battle (in Pixie Plates, of all places) of his integrity and livelihood, versus the unspoken truths that would have to be said if he truly wished to pursue the human.

               He stiffened slightly as Kiki tapped the table, he looked off to the side. His eyes seemed rather sad, but otherwise he seemed to revert back to his usual self. “Yes, my apologies Miss Kiki.”

Ushering his thoughts to the back of his mind, he looked towards Kiki, keeping his arms crossed over his chest. Looking to her food, he decided to change the subject. That was enough personal information divulged for one evening.

     “How is it?”           

How curious not growing up with tales such as that, maybe they didn’t exist around his time? Or he just never got the chance to hear them. Kiki had grown up with vast knowledge of fairytales thanks to her grandmother and mother telling her stories growing up. From what she was told by Stan she figured his childhood wasn’t as wonderous as hers and it made her sad.

She couldn’t help but get flustered at the teasing she received for guessing his origins. However she relaxed when she saw the smile that formed on his face. “Well I just had to double check and I’ve never been to Russia before I wonder what it’s like...”

Even though he seemed to snap back to reality she couldn’t help but notice the emotion that lingered in his eyes. “It’s fine...” she mumbled softly as she averted her gaze. Accepting his change on the topic, “it’s all delicious!” At this point she had finished her burger and fries, her milkshake was nearly gone and she had started on her strawberry cake. A random thought crossed her mind and she voiced it. “If I was ever a vampire I think the one thing I’d miss is being able to eat food!”

[eldritchsurveys]

490.

Do you like using cinnamon on or in any of your food? >> I do. Did you ever make fortune tellers as a kid? >> Yeah, I made a lot of them. Do you know how to cook or bake? >> I know most of the basics of cooking, but I don’t know much of anything about baking. Who is the best cook in your family? >> --- Which berry is your favorite? >> Strawberry.

What is your favorite thing to eat for breakfast? >> I almost always have a veggie burger and chips. I don’t know when or why that became the only food I can eat every day without getting absolutely disgusted with it, but it’s been like that for at least a few months now. The exception that proves the rule, I guess... Do you prefer cappuccinos or frappuccinos? >> I don’t like either. Have you ever tried to learn a foreign language? >> I’ve tried several times to learn German using Duolingo, but I’ve come to think of Duolingo more as a supplementary learning source than a primary one... and since I don’t have an adequate primary learning source, I’ve mostly given up. I still remember a little, though. Would you rather swim in a lake or the ocean? >> The vastness of the ocean attracts me. Which is a hilarious thing for someone who can’t swim to say, but that’s just the way it is. Do you own any leather-bound books? >> No. Which baby animal is your favorite? >> Man, which baby animal isn’t my favourite. Do you like jam on your toast and biscuits? >> Sure, but not a lot. What was the scent of the last candle you burned? >> I burn incense. The scent of the last stick I burned was Dragon’s Blood. (Metal.) Are there any plants in your home? >> Yeah, there’s a spider plant in my room, and a spider plant and a Boston fern in the living room. Oh, and an aloe plant in the dining area. Do you prefer honey, sugar, or something else as a sweetener? >> Honey, if anything. What food does honey go best with? >> I like it in tea, personally. And on peanut butter sandwiches. When is the last time you were lazy and just curled up to read a good book? >> I read almost every day, so this morning. I wouldn’t call it laziness, though -- reading is a mental exercise... What was on the last sandwich that you ate? >> Turkey, pepper jack, broccoli slaw, and mustard. Have you ever carved a pumpkin? >> No. What is your favorite type of weather? >> --- Do you love seeing frost hanging off leaves in the Winter? >> It’s nice, I suppose. Do you love all the rain that Spring brings? >> Don’t even talk to me about rain right now, it’s been rainy for most of the past month. I get sick of rain pretty quickly, if it’s frequent. Do you prefer wrapping presents or putting them in a bag? >> I enjoy the act of wrapping presents, but a bag is fine too.  If your friend made you a batch of cookies, what cookies would you like them to be? >> --- What is your favorite book? >> The Phantom Tollbooth. Have you ever reread a book? >> Yeah. What is your dream house like? >> --- Would you ever like to own a chandelier? >> I wouldn’t necessarily be opposed to it. What scent is the last body wash you used? >> I use bar soap. It’s lavender-scented. Do you have any religious symbols in your home? >> There’s some pagan/heathen stuff floating around. What religion do you identify with, if any? >> I don’t. If you could have a small garden in your backyard, what would you plant? >> I’m not sure. The kind of garden I prefer is one with native flora, so it’d have to depend on where I was living. What pets have you had while growing up? >> Dogs. If you went to an art museum, what do you think you would want to see first? >> I’m not sure. Most art museums have bored me, so I don’t know what an art museum would have to feature for me to be interested. What type of museum would you like to go to? >> I love science and industry museums. Natural history museums can be fun too, especially ones with interactive exhibits. Do you enjoy those tins of butter cookies? >> No. Are you diligent with your studies? >> --- Do you prefer to eat ice cream from a cone or a cup? >> A cup is less mess, but I do like the cone because you can just eat the receptacle. When is the last time you went to a carnival? >> --- Have you ever been to the circus? >> I think I went to one when I was a child, but it’s one of those vague half-formed memories that feel kind of fake. I don’t think it’s fake, I just don’t have enough information to really flesh out the memory. Do you own any art supplies? >> Some markers and a couple of colouring books. Do you have a favorite glass, cup, or mug? >> I have a mug that has a cute cactus on it, and is yellow on the inside. I use that one a lot (for tea). What are some of your favorite scents? >> This is the kind of thing that I have a lot of trouble thinking of when prompted. What is you favorite flavor of pudding and/or yogurt? >> My favourite flavour of yogurt is vanilla bean. The only kind of pudding I eat is rice pudding. Do you have a daily planner that you write in? >> No. What branch of science interests you the most? >> Every branch of science that popped into my head just now is immensely interesting to me from at least some point of view. Do you prefer writing in pen or pencil? >> Pen. How many notebooks do you own? Are they all filled? >> One. Maybe two, I might have another one in a bin somewhere. No, they’re not filled at all, because I can never figure out what to use them for. I just keep one in my tote just in case I ever decide I want to use it... Do you enjoy flavored coffee? If so, which flavor is your favorite? >> No. What kind of tea is your favorite? >> Mint, herbal, chai, ginger, etc. 

[cchellacat]

Working On It

Love All The Marvel Ships Challenge 

Day 5 ~ Kissing

Exactly no one in the Tower was surprised at how well Darcy and Bucky Barnes bonded once he and Steve moved back to New York.

Darcy’s bubbly personality coupled with her insatiable drive to fix people had her stalking the former Winter Soldier within hours of him stepping foot in the Tower.  She was dogged in her determination to welcome him.

Under her constant assault of charm, light flirting and encouragement to join the larger group for dinner and movie nights, Bucky slowly came out of his shell.

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The first time she kissed him was in the heat of the moment.  She’d been running form Sam after he discovered she’d replaced all his coffee with de-caff.  She’d burst into the gym, breathless and giggling wildly when she came across her new friend.

“Hide me, quick, or Sam is gonna string me up.”

Bucky had flicked his eyes towards the vault box and lifted the top, revealing the cavity within.

Darcy wasted no time in running over and trying to climb in, but being short had its disadvantages.  Before she could complain Bucky had lifted her up, princess style before lowering her in with a wink and replacing the top.

A few minutes later Sam had come huffing into the gym.

“Barnes, you seen Lewis?”

“Not since yesterday, why?  You need her for something?”

“Yeah, something.” Sam muttered angrily before leaving.

Darcy held back the cackle that was threatening to burst.  The top lifted and Darcy spring up like a jack-in-the-box, flinging her arms around his neck in a victory hug.

“My hero!”

He pulled her out and placed her down again but before he let go of her she placed a smacking kiss on his cheek.

“Thanks, big guy, gotta go…  don’t forget, Saturday at 7, dinner and a movie.”

She was gone before he could do more than lift a hand to where she had pressed her lips.

Bucky stares in consternation at the door, wondering what the hell just happened.

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Steve’s not stupid, he’s seen the change in his friend ever since Miss Darcy Lewis had steamrollered into their lives.  The girl is hell on wheels and doesn’t seem to take no for an answer.

There had been the Welcome Back cupcakes with silver frosting and red star sprinkles, Steve had nearly choked when she’d thrust the plate into Bucky’s hands, fully expecting him to react badly, but instead he had frowned at the girls hand, a tiny crinkle appearing in the corner of his eyes as he took in the silver pained nails, her middle finger’s adorned with a bright red star on each.  Steve wasn’t sure what it was that Bucky found funny about it, but he had.

Then there had been the Harry Potter movie marathon she’d insisted they sit through.  She’d provided pop corn and chips and beer and had proceeded to talk the whole way through, her feet propped up in Bucky’s lap like they belonged there as she explained everything she felt was culturally relevant.  She ignored Steve’s attempts to indicate that she was invading Bucky’s space and, when about an hour into the first movie Bucky had grabbed her ankles to keep her still he’d thought the worst.   Instead Bucky had just pulled her closer until her calves were over his lap and he’d slung an arm round her to support her back.  Darcy had just snuggled right in and continued her ramble while Steve gaped from the armchair.

It had taken a few months for it to sink in with Steve that Darcy treated Bucky the same was she did everyone, with irreverent respect, tongue in cheek humour and tactile affection.  She was a hugger, she cooked for people, she always had a way of cheering everyone up, even on the worst days.  Other than Pepper, Darcy was the only one allowed into Tony’s lab without a security override.  Bruce positively beamed as she chattered to him over breakfast tea and even Natasha let the girl drag her off shopping or to the spa.  He’d thought at first that the art supplies that kept showing up in his apartment were from Tony or Natasha, but no, Darcy Lewis had somehow figured out his favourite brands and needs and provided them without expectation of thanks.

Bucky seemed to get the full experience though, she brought him shopping and encouraged him to buy things that made him feel good.  She brought a pile of books after Bucky had casually mentioned his love for science fiction.  And every Saturday night she made him dinner and played the big band music Bucky had loved back in the 40’s.

That’s what he walks in on, the music’s blaring loud enough that neither of them hears him come in and he stands still and watches the couple before him.  It’s like he’s suddenly back in those crowded dance halls in Brooklyn.  It’s like seeing a ghost he’s thought long dead.   Bucky is grinning at her as she laughs, spinning out on the floor and letting him swing her through the air with shrieks of delight.

He doesn’t stay, but backs out of the room slowly, feeling as though he’s seem something he shouldn’t have.  Before he can close the door, the music stops and the two clutch each other breathlessly, Darcy leaning into him, Bucky’s hands on her waist.  He watched as his friend presses his lips into her hair-line bestowing a kiss, and thanks her for the dance.  The radiant smile she returns to Bucky hits Steve like lightening.

As Steve walks away he ponders exactly what it is he’s feeling, but honestly it’s a jumble of emotions that all lead back to one fact.   Where Steve had failed to find his old friend inside the damaged shell of the winter soldier, Darcy Lewis had succeeded.  She’d brought him back, slowly but surely.  Instead of the jealousy and resentment he knows is itching in the back of his brain he focuses on the gratitude instead.  He can see where it’s headed, this thing between them and he resolves then that he’ll do whatever it takes to make sure they get their chance at happiness.  Bucky deserves nothing less from his friend.  Steve will protect Darcy Lewis till the day he dies because he knows, if something happens to her, Bucky will retreat and allow the soldier back.

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The first time he does more than press a kiss into her hair, it’s not because anything monumental happens.  It’s a day like any other, Darcy has handed out packets to all the Avengers with the briefings for the press conference later that day and she is rushing around the common kitchen making sure everyone has had breakfast as she tops up her coffee and fixes one for Bucky since he’s only just come in.  When she brings him the coffee and places it on the table in front of him he turns his head and gives her cheek a quick peck in silent thanks, she squeezes his shoulder briefly before leaving, calling out to remind everyone they’re due in the lobby at four.

Darcy keeps her smile fixed firmly in place until she reaches the elevator and the door close and then she allows herself a moment to freak out a little.  He’d just kissed her, right in front of everyone and yeah, okay, he’s been pressing tiny kisses into her hair for a month now when they danced or snuggled on the couch and she hadn’t taken it as anything other than brotherly, but that…. That was… well it was something else entirely.  It had felt like a sleepy morning hello, the sort of kiss you gave your other half after months of living together, like a part of your daily routine that needed no explanation, but they were just friends, right?  Except friends didn’t have lunch every day and spend evenings watching Netflix together while cuddling on the couch….  Christ on a cracker, has she been dating him and never even noticed?  Did he think they were dating?  Were they?

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Christmas was only a week away and the Tower was hung with holly and mistletoe, trees were festooned with ribbons and tinsel and Darcy was about ready to cry with the preparations for the Christmas Eve ball.   All she wanted was to go home and sleep for a week.  Instead she was stuck counting chairs, ordering the place cards for the dinner and finding a seating arrangement that wouldn’t lead to a political nightmare.

She was just about to leave the common room and head to her apartment when a voice stopped her.

“Darcy, I’ve been looking for you, Doll.”

“Hey Bucky, what’s up?”

She was standing in the hall just outside the kitchen when he caught up with her.

Before he said a word, he looked above her and raised an eye brow.   She tilted her head and smirked.  There was a bunch of mistletoe hanging right over where she stood.

They both unconsciously moved a little closer.

Unbidden, her thoughts all went right there.  He was so close she could smell him, the intoxicating scent sandalwood and gun oil making her dizzy.  Although they spent a frequent amount of time together and he had kissed her cheek a few weeks ago, she still hadn’t managed to figure out a way to make a move on him.  Now, overhead was the perfect way to settle the question once and for all.

“Huh, I guess I’m just gonna be stuck here till someone kisses me.”   Her teeth catch her lower lip and she looks up at him with big blue eyes, willing the universe to please, just please listen to her just this once.

Bucky thinks if he doesn’t make a move now, they’ll still be where they are this time next year.

“Could be a while, everyone’s out right now.”  He drawls mischievously.  

“Yes, they are.”  The smile on her face widens as he draws closer.   He’s got this look in his eyes, like he thinks she might back out, but that is so far from the truth as to be laughable.

Darcy hooks her fingers through his belt loops and tugs him even closer, till there’s hardly a space between them at all.  He mirrors her earlier expression, that bottom lip of his held down by his teeth like he’s stopping himself form saying something particularly filthy and a thrill runs up her spine

Slender fingers walk a path up his chest, and he catches her waist in one hand, their bodies now pressed together hip to chest and Darcy feels the hitch in her breath at the warmth of him.  His other hand runs through her hair, tugging the locks back from her face before his thumb traces a line down her neck.

There’s a moment in that silence between them, before they kiss that feels like the universe paused for just a second and it makes her head swim.

Pressing up on her toes, her belly fills with butterflies.  His eyes darken and the hand on her moves smoothly around till it’s splayed against her back, keeping her steady.

At first, it’s just a light brush of lips, both of them figuring out how this will work.  It grows stronger and deepens, heat rushes through her blood as she hooks her arms round his neck and sinks her fingers into his hair.

The little moan he makes draws a smile to her lips and he traces the seam of her mouth with his tongue, begging entrance.  Now it’s her that moans, as he teases into her mouth, all hot and wet and tasting like coffee and cherries.  Nothing could have prepared her for the sudden zing of fire rushing through her core, the insistent need that ached for far more than a simple kiss.  He felt it too she knew, if the way he intensified the assault on her mouth was anything to go by.  Then she was drowning in him, sparks dancing over her skin where he touched her, his hands seeming to be everywhere at once.  For those blessed minutes the only thing that existed for her was him, the firmness of his chest, the soft sweetness of his lips and the strength of his arms holding her up.  Lightheaded they finally broke away from each other, surety and excitement in every short breath.

“Do I need to hang mistletoe everywhere to get you to kiss me like that again?”  She asks him with a grin.

The soft smile he gave her turned to full blown laughter and he picks her up, spinning her around as she yelps in surprise.

“Don’t need nothing except you, Doll.”

NEXT

@captain-rogers-beard