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#like literally anything. he wants to do it for me. he takes care of me more than anyone I’ve ever met 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 like he’s out here doing the
slvttyplum · 2 days
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easy access was suguru's thing; he loved to just slide his hand in your pants or lift up your skirt and have your bare ass shown. not only was it great for when you looked a little too good that he couldn't resist, but it was just sexy when you wore no panties, like you were telling him to fuck you, which you were.
there was something a little different from sliding your panties to the side and him just sliding himself in; when he just slid himself in, it felt better because you got wetter that way, at least that's what he thought. you were only that wet, practically dripping down your thigh because you knew he would take the bait; it was like putting his favorite treat out; he was going to take it every time.
he was extremely observant when it came to you; he noticed everything you did, down to your mannerisms, which he would mirror subconsciously, so you knew that his eyes would burn through your clothes when he noticed you weren't wearing any panties, his mouth watering instantly. 
of course, you didn't intentionally not wear panties all the time; sometimes you just wanted a break for them, but suguru didn't know nor did he care about any of that. if he saw your bare ass, his dick were standing tall. he was like a teenage boy who couldn't control his hormones when it came to you.
even when you told him to give it a rest, he'd pout and just ask you if he could eat you out. with his dick as hard as a rock and cum leaking from his tip, it was pathetic but so fucking sexy.
"please, baby, just give me five minutes." while already getting on his knees, inching closer to your wet core. if he saw an opening, he was going to take it. he used his opportunities, and all you could do was applaud him for his consistency but curse at yourself for still continuing not to wear panties.
you only wore no panties initially when you actually wanted to draw him in, and his dick stretched you out—not him sliding against you in the kitchen one second, and the next he's bending you over and slamming himself against you, and his dick pushing deep inside of you.
"you should stay naked; that'll be better." with that cute smile on his face, joking, but deep down you knew it wasn't a joke; he wanted you pantieless all the time; it was actually insane. asking you not to wear panties when you both went out just in case anything happened. you didn't know whether to be impressed or freaked out, but he never disappointed you when he fucked.
he made up for the soft words he would use when whispering and begging in your ear while filling your pussy out and making the ten minutes he had you bent over worth it.
one thing he really loved was finding you bent down and noticing that you didn't have any panties on, a hue of dark red coating his cheeks, and his hands going straight for his dick that was standing at attention just for you. his hand on your ass as you let out a sigh, but not from annoyance but at the fact that he already fucked you; he couldn't help it, but could you blame him?
you hated to admit it, but if he walked around with no briefs on, you would be on him twenty-four seven, and your throat would be hurting from how much you deepthroat him throughout the day, but that's another story for another day... literally.
all you could do was keep your panties on, but suguru will always find a way to slide them off.
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Werewolf husband who gets you pregnant with your first liter and is the sweetest but he can’t help how good you look! Please he knows you’re tired but he just wants a taste! He’ll do anything you want after please just let him in-between your legs
it starts off innocent, just a massage for his lovely mate, he insists you sit down and rest while he does his best to pamper you. you've done so much just by being pregnant all day, let him take care of you.
He rubs your feet while listening to you talk about your day and slowly his clawed hands move up, rubbing your calf and slowly working up to your thigh. He's trying to focus on your words but every time he moves his hands up your breath catches and you stumble over your words. You're so cute, so easily flustered and those cute surprised noises you keep making aren't helping.
He strokes your inner thigh carefully, the image of his hand disappearing under your skirt is enough to make you squirm on your own even if he isn't touching you anywhere inappropriate yet.
"Sounds like you've had a hard day," he purrs in a low voice. his eyes are deep and piercing. wanting. You suddenly feel very small, like a hunted animal countered by the big bad wolf.
"I- guess," you say. he looms over you, pulling your legs apart,
"let me make it a little better," he purrs before reaching down to tug your underwear off.
"Baby I'm tired," you groan, thinking about the rough sex that your werewolf husband loved, you loved it too but you didn't think you could physically take it.
"I'll be gentle, make you feel good, a nice orgasm will make you nice and sleepy then I'll carry you to bed," he promises, already licking his lips. he's desperate to taste you, to pleasure you, he's practically drooling. it's kind of a turn-on. He's already kissing your thigh, his hands roaming your body, rubbing over your pregnant belly up to palm your swollen tits.
"Okay, okay," you sigh, leaning back and spreading your legs for him to bury his face in your cunt. He's slow, and passionate as he slowly runs his tongue over your folds, tasting you before pushing his thick tongue inside of you making you shudder. he's never been this patient when eating you out, usually, he's rushed and sloppy, spitting on your pussy to get you wet before shoving his fingers in your pussy to get you stretched for his big cock.
This isn't that. this is a make-out session with your pussy, this is eating you out for the sake of eating you out. You let yourself relax, slowly grinding against his face as he snarls and laps at your folds tension builds in your body, every moan you let past your lips only spurred him on to keep going. you shudder as you cum, his lips wrapped around your clit, you can feel him grinning to himself as you whimper and ride out your orgasm.
"thank you," he purrs, scooping you up in his arms to take you to bed, just as he promised.
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vivwritesfics · 3 days
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Hii!! Could you please write a Max verstappen x soulmate reader. Like they can speak in each other's minds and how they first met. Like fluff or angst or whatever you want . You make the call. Please 🥺🥺
LMAOOOO IM LITERALLY WRITING THIS FOR RHETT ABBOTT
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Nothing, just an inchident. Fucking asshole.
Those were the first words her soulmate ever said to her, the first time she heard his voice in her head. She stopped what she was doing, looking around with wide eyes.
What the fuck?
What the fuck?
And that was how it started. The two had be so fucking surprised, buy recovered quickly. They gave awkward introductions, without actually telling each other anything about themselves.
It took the two of them a moment to realise that, whatever they thought, the other person could hear.
It seemed the two of them hadn't shut up since.
She learnt pretty quickly that he loved to talk, that he loved explaining things. He was a nerd, he loved gaming. She could have listened to him go on about gaming for hours (and she often did).
She couldn't remember what she had told him. Definitely everything but her name. God, how long had it been since his voice first entered her head.
Hey, she said as she woke up.
There was usually no response as she waited for him to wake up. She'd tried to use this to work out where in the world he was, but he was always moving, always on different time zones.
A few hours later, there he was. Hello, schat, he said in her mind. A small smile crossed her face. Are you doing anything nice today?
He rarely spoke about his own day, she noticed. But it wasn't a problem. If he wanted to her know, she'd know. My dad got me tickets to see my local race with him, she replied, pausing her makeup to concentrate on talking to him.
There was a beat before he responded. You still there? She asked, pausing on her eye liner.
What race? Cars or horses?
Cars, she responded.
Again, there was a moment of silence. But then, Not the Formula One, right?
She thought back to what her father had told her. Yeah, the Formula One.
Her soulmate when quiet after that. There was a good few hours where she finished getting ready and went with her father to the race track. All that time she'd been trying to talk to her soulmate, and all that time she'd been getting nothing in return.
It was a little disheartening, thinking her soulmate didn't want to talk to her.
No, it was really disheartening.
As she and her father sat in the stands, she couldn't help but sulk. What had she done to upset him so bad he didn't want to hear from her? Of course he could hear everything she was thinking, but she didn't much care if he wasn't going to reply.
But then all twenty cars were on the track and the lights were flashing red, ready to go green.
I'm going to win this one for you.
It had been so unexpected, it nearly had her jumping out of her seat. What? Are you here?
As soon as I'm standing on that podium, you'll know it's me.
She must have realised it then, that her soulmate was down in the number on Red Bull car. She didn't take her eyes off of it for the entirety of the race (unless she was forced to). Holy shit, that was her soulmate down there.
And he did win it. Won it for her. She watched it all, him finishing first, the podium celebrations.
How do I get to you? She asked as she hopelessly looked around. Max Verstappen was her freaking soulmate!
Stay right where you are, schat. I'll come to you.
She told him where she was, apparently able to do that now she knew for sure who her soulmate was. And there she waited as he finished a debrief with the team and got changed.
But then he was striding towards her, cap pulled low. For so many years he'd been just a voice in her head. And now he was in front of her. Smiling down at her with surprise in his eyes.
"You're beautiful." Those were the first words he said to her, the first words that weren't echoing around her head.
"So are you." Wiping her hands on her jeans, she held one out and gave him her name.
Max took her hand and shook. "I'm Max," he said, wearing his usual pretty smile.
Holy fuck, Max Verstappen really was her soulmate.
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svtswhorehouse · 1 day
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OT 13 : edging vs overstimulation
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Seungcheol : overstimulation. honestly, i feel as if he’s the type of person to use it as a punishment. ya’ll would probably go through like a hundred different positions and he’ll make you cum with every single one before he can switch to the next. would hit you with that faux sympathy and imitate a pouty face when he slows down to check on you. when you say you’re okay, he’ll slam back into you again. won’t stop until you use your safe word, but will take a break if you really need it. needs to see your mascara running, desperate doe eyes, and fucked out expression the entire time.
Jeonghan : edging. oh baby, good luck with this one. A MENACE. would probably do it for hours until you’re crying and a babbling mess. he lowkey gets off on how pathetic and dumb you get for him. likes being begged, so he might gaslight you into thinking you don’t want it as much as you say you do which will make you even more desperate. the type to use anything from his tongue, to his dick, to toys — you’ve grown to hate vibrators overtime. also another one who would fake being sympathetic and imitate your sad face. he would probably play dumb like “what baby? why are you crying?” he’s a meanie overall, and will do it just for fun but he’ll make you feel good so don’t you worry your pretty little head.
Joshua : edging. he’s honestly such a sweet and caring person, but he’s also friends with jeonghan and apart of the 95’ line so what do you expect. some days he would choose to be nice, but other days he would decide to be a tease. honestly, not that bad though. he would only do it for a little while before deciding you’ve had enough. lowkey likes it when you cry. he has the biggest hands in seventeen so he utilizes them a lot, especially when it comes to you. enjoys the way you clench around them whenever he stops. he definitely takes time to examine your face which a teasing smile and ask you “what’s wrong,” even though he knows he’s being an ass.
Jun : edging. tbh, does it just to laugh and be a little shit. will be fingering you, pull away really quickly and look back up at you with a smile on his face. will probably be like “ha, you thought,” or “gotcha.” let’s out the cutest giggle whenever he does it that sometimes it’s difficult for you to be mad at him. does it a few times before you smack him on his shoulder and threaten him with no pussy for a week. will definitely let you cum after that.
Hoshi : overstimulation. HOSHI IS A MUNCH AND NO ONE CAN CONVINCE ME OTHERWISE. would probably choose to live between your thighs if you let him tbh. def eats pussy like he’s a starved man and it’s his last meal he’ll ever have. probably enjoys it more than you do. you can push him away all you want, but he’ll come right back (will literally beg you if that’s what it takes, he loves pussy). main dancer and his stamina is insane, so he doesn’t mean to overstimulate you really, he can just go for hours. you would definitely have to take breaks in between rounds with this one.
Wonwoo : edging. finds it amusing. might tie you up, just to keep you still whenever he decides to go to town on your pussy. he’ll shoot you a little smirk from time to time which will end up pissing you off because he def knows he’s being an asshole. prefers to edge you with his cock, he likes the way your pussy flutters around it whenever he stops. also, his favorite time to do it is whenever he’s gaming. he’ll have you sit on his cock and have you do all the work while he plays a video game. it’s only when your whines start getting louder and movements start to get fast when he’ll place a firm hand on your hip and hold you in place. loves when you look at him all teary eyed, but still promises he’ll make you feel good after. no one said how long his game was gonna last though so good luck.
Woozi : wild card. depends on what HE feels like. you have no say. you just shut your mouth and look pretty for him. if he’s stressed he’ll edge you, but if he needs a mental break or something, he’ll overstimulate you. will definitely happen in his studio the most, just cause that’s where most of his stress leads back to — writing and producing. enjoys cockwarming while he works, but if you’re being stubborn and moving too much, he’ll decide to fuck and overstimulate you. will be like “i thought this is what you wanted baby? couldn’t stay still cause you wanted my cock so bad hm?”
Dokyeom : overstimulation. he’s just happy to please overall. also another one that doesn’t mean to overstimulate you. he just wants to make you feel good and when you try and push him away, he just might look at you with puppy dog eyes. also loves when you sit on his face, he feels like he can be as messy as he wants. asks why you’re crying, but not in a mocking type of way, he just genuinely doesn’t know that it feels too good that it’s getting hard to hold yourself up. it’s a good thing he’s strong.
Mingyu : overstimulation. i feel like he has an oral fixation and cures it by eating you out tbh. this big and beefy man specifically loves it when you sit on his face. if you hover over him for a second too long, he’s pulling you down and holding you in place. obviously he’s ridiculously strong so when you try and pull away, he doesn’t let you. will gaslight you into thinking you can take one more, even if it’s the hundredth time and you’ll agree just because it feels too good to say no. will cage you in with his arms and fucks you so good you wouldn’t be able to utter an audible sentence. likes when yours eyes get all dazed and it looks as if there’s not a thought in your head. he’ll be on a mission to make you squirt.
Minghao : edging. says that you need to practice patience ???? might use it as a learning experience for you ???? might make you want to kill him after ???? lmao. i feel as if he’s more likely to deny your orgasm completely than to edge you. like he would edge for a bit, but overall wouldn’t let you cum. he says it’s to learn to be more patient, but really he just enjoys how desperate and whiny you get after. will definitely fuck you nice and good when y’all get in bed for the night. might tease you by edging you once, but when tears start to brim your eyes, he’ll let up. just, be a good girl for him and don’t piss him off.
Seungkwan : edging. honestly, he’s sweet with it. will check in on you often and make sure you’re doing okay. seungkwan’s favorite way of edging you is by literally having you grind on his thigh. he enjoys how easy it is to get you off and likes to see his skin coated with your slick. also, he def knows his quads are strong af so why would you not wanna ride his thigh? will mutter words of encouragement and praise, even when he stops your movements. knows that him shaking his leg really helps so he’ll stop moving altogether when he feels like you’re getting close. a sucker for your tears so he might give in if you play your cards right.
Vernon : honestly, whatever you want. goes with the flow and the mood. vernon is the type of guy who might let you take the lead. if you wanted to dom for the night then okay. if you wanted to fuck in a bathroom then okay. if you wanted to be edged or overstimulated then he will help you. won’t do it as a punishment, but it’s also not something that he thinks of. you might have to bring it up or give him hints before he can act on it. you might also have to control it so like when you think you’re gonna cum you might have to push him away, or if you want to be overstimulated, just take the lead and hold him close.
Dino : overstimulation. another main dancer right here. he has a lot of energy in him. you would want it as much as he’s happy to give it though. y’all are definitely the type of couple to fuck like two bitches in heat. he would be on a mission to either see how many surfaces y’all could fuck on or how many rounds he’s capable of going which will therefore lead to you getting overstimulated. honestly, doesn’t mean to overstimulate you he just gets a little excited. will apologize after and be so soft with you though so it’s okay.
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uriekukistan · 3 days
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JJK 261 ANALYSIS: What happened, how, why Yuuta made the choice he did, and a discussion of tragedy & major themes of JJK
MAJOR spoilers below the cut so please read at your risk.
i wanted to dissect what happened a bit, and address a few points i saw floating around since the leaks dropped. of course, these are all my interpretations, so feel free to disagree, i just had a lot of thoughts floating around that i wanted to put out for discussion.
I. Gojo was never coming back
first of all, i don't know how you guys expected him to survive bisection. i said this earlier in the day as my justification for why i didn't think gojo was coming back, prior to leaks, and i don't think i can say it any better now.
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and this is just my interpretation of reverse curse technique, but if anything, yuuta in this chapter supports my theory. in the scene where he's on shoko's table and arata nitta says that he's used rct to keep the wounds from getting worse, but it might be too late for yuuta to recover. in that case, gojo wasn't coming back from being sliced in half. it's just not possible.
additionally, and this is another thing that i've said for a long time. he says right in episode 6 (i forgot the chapter) that his dream is to reset the jujutsu world raise up a generation of strong students that work together. that is why he became a teacher. this very clearly comes from his relationship with suguru, and it's one of gojo's clearest motivations from the beginning.
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the problem is, in order to achieve this, he has to die. so long as satoru gojo is alive, he will have to carry the burden of being the strongest alone. his students won't have to work together, because gojo will just take care of everything. this is already in the works, with how many people have come together to stand against sukuna. if gojo lived and defeated sukuna on his own, this wouldn't have happened, and bringing him back would, again, reduce the need for his students work together.
unfortunately, gojo has been doomed by the narrative from the start, and his primary goal as a character basically requires his death to be realized in its entirety.
II. They're not heroes, they're jujutsu sorcerers.
yeah, i'm stealing megumi's line because it's true. he literally said it twice for a reason, and then yuuta said a repackaged version of it in this chapter ("we're about to fight history's strongest jujutsu sorcerer. if we can win by throwing away our humanity, we shouldn't even be arguing about this").
trust, all the characters are well aware of the ethical issues with taking gojo's body after he's dead, both with what it means for gojo, and with what it means for yuuta. but this isn't a story about heroism, this isn't a story about the power of friendship. if it was, yuuji would have saved junpei all the way back at the beginning of the series. it was pretty clear from the start that this wasn't going to be the typical shounen manga like that.
in fact, expecting it to be is unrealistic. it's unrealistic in real life too, if i'm being so honest. everyone wants to think they'd take the moral high road in this type of situation, but the reality is, when you're fighting tooth and nail against an opponent that is fighting dirty, you have to fight dirty too if you want to win, and i think that's what yuuta is trying to point out in this chapter.
this happens in real life wars which im not gonna get into examples because i dont want to start that kind of discourse, but like...it's so great to be idealistic and hope that virtue will triumph simply because it is virtuous, but i think if you take a look around, you'll realize it's true that good people do not get what they deserve simply because they're good (that's so megumi of me to say...). or if you think of it like a board game, if a player is cheating, it is infinitely harder to win without cheating yourself.
maybe this is a bit pessimistic of me to say, but you will not win a dirty fight without getting dirty yourself, and i think it's pretty clear that sukuna fights dirty.
additionally, it's shitty to see gojo be weaponized, and i understand that, but it plays into the themes about strength in jjk, which i will get into.
III. This was not an "ass pull."
i don't really have much to say to this. did you think yuuta wouldn't take kenjaku's technique? plus, kenjaku being eaten by rika is probably the only surefire way to ensure that they're dead and won't just hop to another body. i've already said why gojo wouldn't come back, but it makes sense that if yuuta were to copy kenjaku's technique, who else would he body hop into, if not gojo? there's already narrative evidence to support this action, from the guidelines of yuuta's technique, kenjaku's technique, and gojo's technique, to the character of yuuta okkotsu, which i want to do an analysis in a separate post for him, so i won't get into that right now.
idk...to me, all the threads connect, plus i felt like yuuta's return was foreshadowed pretty heavily in 259 & 260, with the mention of yuuta's plan that yuuji couldn't know, and then on the last page of 260, the comparison of sukuna and yuuta, so for me, i always thought that it was not actually gojo, but yuuta at the end of 260.
IV. Themes of JJK: The burden of being "the strongest," or even just strong
even many jjk fans see gojo as "the strongest," and nothing more, doing exactly what the narrative sets up as one of the chief problems of jjk. a lot of gojo's actions are spurred on by the burden he feels from being the strongest modern sorcerer. his entire character is built around this problem of the responsibility and burden that falls on someone who's considered to be "the best" at anything.
in fact, this is also a driving point for geto too, and the conflicts geto and gojo come into with each other, as well as geto's inevitable fall from grace. it all comes from this issue that's at the core of jujutsu society. gojo recognizes that, and, as i mentioned, that is why he became a teacher. so that no young sorcerers will feel the burden of being the strongest alone.
the problem is this is easier said than done. after gojo dies, this burden gets passed down to yuuta, and he feels that immense pressure, which is why he decides to do what he does. he says "haven’t we been pushing the burden of being a monster onto gojo-sensei alone? if gojo-sensei is gone, then who else will be the monster? If no one intends to become one, then I will!" and i think this really powerful evidence of the pressure and burden of being the strongest, and i think the word monster is really important here. the burden pushes people to be something they're not, a shadow of their true self.
it distorts morality, like with geto. it isolates people, like with gojo. it forces people to go to unspeakable lengths to uphold their burden, like with yuuta. it leads people with immense power to doubt themselves, like with megumi. it leads people to feel like a cog in the machine, not a human, like with yuuji.
this is sooo so important and a key theme of jjk, and this chapter in particular, and the driving force behind yuuta's actions.
V. Themes in JJK: Loneliness and Isolation
this one has, in my opinion, a bigger role in the story overall than just in this chapter.
as i mentioned before, gojo is lonely. the only person who could understand him was geto, and he turned away from him, and then died. he seems like a silly guy or whatever, but it's just a mask.
but geto also felt alone and isolated, and that's why he turned away. between gojo and geto, neither of them were able to put share the burden of carrying their strength alone, and it's what kept them apart and made their relationship so tragic.
arguably, and though he would never admit it, sukuna is also lonely, though it's buried deep within him and something he will likely never acknowledge, despite it, and his lack of understanding of love (arguably a symptom of his loneliness), are major reasons for the way he acts.
yuuta, though supported by maki, inumaki, and panda in a way that the previously mentioned characters are not, is still isolated. he alone carries the burden of his strength. he was also alone his whole life after rika died, and then again when he was shipped off to africa, away from his friends (yeah he had miguel, maybe i'm missing something, but i dont see them having that type of relationship.
not only that, but yuuta recognizes gojo's loneliness, and reaches out to tell him not to try to stand by himself once again, and gojo admits that's something he can't do, the reason being his relationship with geto.
even further, yuuji and megumi, the parallel to satosugu, are both deeply lonely, except for when they have each other. i mentioned in this analysis that the reason megumi can't just get up and keep going is because he's alone and has been for over a month. i want to get into this more in my next point.
VI. Where I think (hope) this leads for JJK
a satisfying ending for jjk, in my opinion, would be the resolution to this loneliness and burden of strength issue that has been present throughout the narrative. something like yuuji being able to save megumi and them being able to correct what went wrong with satosugu in their own relationship.
personally would like to see satosugu reach the ending they should have had through the itafushi parallels - let them save each other! but i do know gege said only one of them (the trio + gojo) will die, or only one will live....that was years ago maybe he changed his mind :D
we all want to see yuuji take down sukuna himself, but i think it would be a great resolution to see everyone take down sukuna as a team. no one person is alone, no one person has the burden of the strongest. i know i said this wasn't a "power of friendship" manga, and i stand by that, but i think this would be the perfect ending. yuuta throws his humanity away to do what he did in 261 because he felt like it was the only choice and it was something he alone could do, but yuuji represents unwavering humanity (literally his name), and i think to preserve that, they all need to share that burden. let them realize they need each other.
this is what gojo died for, and this is what he lived for. this is why he became a teacher in the first place- to raise a generation that can be strong together, that can support one another.
VII. "It's poorly written torture porn!" "There's no point if there's no happy ending!" etc
i said this in a separate post but tragedies have existed in literature since the 6th century BCE, 2600 years ago. many of the most popular stories throughout history have been tragedies, for example, orpheus & eurydice, romeo & juliet, even things like the fault in our stars and the titanic movie. here's a quick explanation of what it means for a story to be a tragedy (yeah it's from wikipedia but they want me to pay to access the original source and im not doing that for a jjk analysis)
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one of things i like most about this definition is the use of the word "catharsis," which is to say that the expression of strong emotions is a way of bringing about renewal and relief. in literature, it's used to say that with the arousal and following release of negative emotions relieves suppressed emotions for the viewer. im not gonna get too personal with it, but i know i've experienced this with jjk.
additionally all of the aforementioned tragedies, they have a message, no matter how sad they are. orpheus & eurydice inspires perseverance and faith in the gods. even something like titanic has messages about everlasting love that overcomes all boundaries. jjk has its message too, and it's long underway. we just have to wait for it to reach its conclusion.
it's easy to lose sight of the bigger picture when we only get one chapter a week, and the fact that the pain is so dragged out is a bit tiring, i'll admit. but that doesn't mean it's bad. having negative emotions stirred by a story doesn't mean bad writing. i mean, i would hope you feel sad. i would hope you feel angry. i would be concerned if you didn't. but given that jjk is a tragedy, that just indicates good writing. especially these last two chapters, i've felt moved in a way nothing else has done for me in a long time.
as always, these are just my thoughts!!! im happy to hear from anyone what they think :D
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never not mine | jjk | "i hear..."
pairing(s): jungkook x reader
Bygones will be bygone eras, fading into grey. Breaking up with Jeon Jungkook had been a vicious, clean break. He tried to take it back, but the damage was already done. You walked out of the world you didn't belong in, at least until Kim Taehyung calls your name.
this is part i | part ii | part iii
warnings: rated M (18+) for language; mentions of controlling behaviors in a romantic relationship; reader is emotionally distant after said breakup; second chance romance?; angst and fluff and feels; your POV
non-idol!AU; fashion model!Jungkook — ft fellow model/actor!Kim Taehyung and model/businessman!Kim Seokjin; and a certain Maestro cameo; reader is not part of the entertainment industry
--
“Please love me again.”
You could hear him saying it but you pretended not to hear. You pretended not to know. You pretended he wasn’t there. He was persona non grata. No, he was simply another blurry face amongst many that faded into the grey background of grey days. He was only a ghost. If he happened to be in the same place as you were, it wasn’t any of your damn business. People were allowed to be wherever they wanted to be.
“I’m sorry.”
Yes, he was.
Sorry that he couldn’t walk all over you like he wanted. Sorry that he couldn’t control you on that leash like he wanted. Sorry that you had the balls to cut all ties and not put up with his selfish bullshit anymore. Sorry. What a word. Your response had not been a vindictive one, though. You hadn’t blocked him on social media. You figured he would block you himself. The last moments were him berating you for being late, what if something happened to you, I was worried, and you snapping. It had taken every fiber of your being to not fling your clutch in his face and tell him to take himself out if he cared so much.
“I understand what you meant now.”
The first couple times he attempted to speak to you after it all, you were ice-cold furious. So angry that you simply refused to speak to avoid spitting literal fire. So, you didn’t. And then it became a habit. Then you stopped caring. You stopped feeling. You lived your life.
Alone.
Like an abandoned puppy, Jeon Jungkook followed you every chance he got, but there were less and less chances as time went on. You would walk past him. He would follow until it was definitely too creepy and simply stop, staring after you with a lost look in his empty eyes. Everyone could see the broken heart in his stare.
A lot of people asked you what happened.
It was a valid question.
It was just as valid for you to not answer.
“I’m not going to talk about that. We can talk about something else.”
You avoided people who couldn’t let it go or cut them out altogether. What was the point of shit-talking, taking sides, making yourself angry over things that couldn’t be changed? What was the point of being upset over nights that couldn’t be taken back? Over phone calls and you sitting alone in a restaurant, empty chair in front of you and the reason in your hand, an opportunity came up, I’m leaving for Los Angeles in the morning, I need to pack, bye. Over trips suddenly cut short in the middle, the agency called, another model got sick last minute so I gotta go, just stay here and have fun. By yourself. Over accusations, what are you doing right now, send a photo, now. Over doubts, are you really at the supermarket, I don’t know, you could be doing anything, I’m not there after all. Over being five minutes late because the taxi you had taken was driven by an older gentleman chatting away, and you didn’t have the heart to tell him to shut up simply because of a boy.
Five minutes.
“Where were you? You need to tell me if you’re late. What if something happened? I was worried.”
“The driver was talking to me.”
“And you couldn’t text that you were okay?”
“I didn’t think it was that big of a deal.”
“Am I not your priority?” he had hissed.
Snap.
All those times, all those moments, okay, I understand, it’s fine, you can make it up to me later, they all came back to you in vivid recollections, and you had stared at Jeon Jungkook. All those people saying how lucky you must be having such a good-looking guy, an actual fashion model, must be so nice, and you only said nice things about him because it didn’t occur to you to complain, no, it would be silly to complain about someone you loved. That was part of loving someone, wasn’t it, being in love was putting up with these things and believing in their words. All those instances, prove what you’re doing, send a photo. Now. All that shit got you to this moment right here, right now, under this furious scrutiny, his dark brows furrowed, his pretty mouth twisted in a frown, his question ringing in your ears.
His accusation in which he had already deemed you guilty.
“The fuck you say to me?” you had growled softly.
Never once did you ask him what he was doing in the destination that he was at. Never once did you fault him for going out and having fun. Never once did you say anything about the multiple social posts of beaches and hotels and nightclubs and everyone scantily-clad, his arms around fellow models, pressed up against fabulous guys and glamorous girls. If he didn’t answer you for a couple days, you assumed it was due to long shoot days and combined jetlag making him crash. The very answer he gave you the first time you asked. You believed him then. There was no need to ask for confirmation over and over if you trusted him. And you did trust him.
Now, this.
“I was five minutes late. If I thought I would be later, I would have texted you,” you explained with emotionless calm. “At least I showed up. At least I didn’t make you sit down in the restaurant, wait around for an hour only to get a text that you aren’t coming. Not even a phone call anymore.”
You hadn’t raised your voice.
He had looked taken aback.
“But… I thought you would understand.”
“Of course, I understand.” The seething anger was white-hot but your tone was crystal-clear cold. “I can understand, as long as you show me some grace and appreciation for not losing my shit every time it happens. Am I not your priority? When have I ever been yours?”
He tried to answer quickly. “You’re always–”
But you were already pulling up the rideshare app, calling another car to come pick you up. “Am I? Then why accuse me the second I get out of the car? Where was I? In the taxi. You saw me get out of it. Why are you holding five minutes over my head like a death sentence, as if I surely betrayed you in those extra five minutes? If it’s you it could be five, thirty, hours, but I have to understand you are networking. I have to understand you are being personable. I have to understand that you are practicing being friendly because it doesn’t come naturally to you.”
Jungkook simply gawked at you, wide-eyed.
You narrowed your eyes, creating a distance he could no longer cross.
“Am I just here so you have someone to visit when you’re bored? Someone to fuck?”
Maybe the vulgarity was taking it too far. Maybe saying all of this in public right now was in poor taste. His jarring question rang in your head. Am I not your priority? Maybe you were wrong to say it all now, but it was the way he said it, as if your love for him had become invalid once you were five minutes late to the appointed time for this date that you didn’t know whether or not he would abandon you in the middle of or take you home and rock your world – and you realized you didn’t care what the outcome was.
You just didn’t give a fuck anymore.
There were so many things he could have done. He could break up with you if his career was more important. He could say sorry more. He could find ways to make it up to you. He could, but he didn’t, and you understood. But this. This you could not understand. This he could not do.
No.
This you would not let him do.
If this was innocent concern, he made it worse by coming off as suffocating and hovering. Now, you realized that no excuse would have been good enough to convince him otherwise. He had already made up his mind to attack you the second you walked out of that car, delivering in the fatal blow instantly. All those moments. All those times had become hair-thin cracks, marring the bond between you and him, tiny little slices to kill the relationship and your will to be in it.
“I don’t think…”
He trailed off, not completing his thought.
The car pulled up.
This was surely the meaning of quiet treason.
“No, you don’t,” you had finished for him with icy agreement. “You expect. You expect me to be here and hold your hand when you want it, and now I know you will never ask me if I ever need my hand held.”
You had stepped away from the curb, not once raising your voice, no longer looking at him, your knuckles digging into your beaded black clutch. You expected it to hurt at least a little.
It was nothing compared to this death by a thousand cuts.
“W-Wait!”
You didn’t.
You had opened the car door and closed it quickly. The driver  requested you to confirm your name. You tersely nodded. They didn’t ask any further questions even as you witnessed Jungkook’s shocked face in the side mirror as the vehicle drove away. You didn’t look back. You didn’t even cry. Maybe you should have given him a chance to say something. A chance to change.
Except you had.
This wasn’t the first time that you had this conversation, although the first time was you sitting him down and saying, hey, if you’re not sure about your schedule, let’s not arrange any dates around those days. We can go out when things settle down. The answer was agreement and all was well for a couple weeks. And then it would happen again. And then you would bring it up again. Whoops. And again.Then he would ask you what you were doing when he wasn’t there. Oh, really? Send pictures.You asking, this is a bit much, isn’t it? The answer being, I want to know you’re safe. You finally admitting that it drove you a bit crazy. Him laughing and saying he was a bit of a handful, brushing away your concerns in light of his own.
Five minutes.
Am I not your priority?
The anger had nowhere to go.
Like how summer turned into fall and then into winter, the anger grew cold and dense and concentrated. A stone. Then one day you turned it over and found nothing underneath. You stopped caring. On one hand, you could have been the bigger person and reached out. On another hand, you didn’t see the reason in wasting any more time. What good was closure? What good would it do, talking it out and getting the same result? Deserve this, deserve that. Fair or not, at the end of the day, it didn’t work and there was no forcing something if neither party wanted to really try. I understand, until you couldn’t anymore.
Now.
Now, you would sit alone at restaurants and not be disappointed.
Table for one, yes, thank you.
Now you would spend hours at the games store and no one would be asking you to take pictures and prove that you were there. He used to play video games too, but he gradually fell out of them. Busy. Felt like he couldn’t keep up. Sold his PC because he was never home.
Emptiness where he had once enjoyed spending that time with you.
You would stay at the music store for a long time, looking over albums and wondering if you should buy them. It had been such a long time. You never listened to CDs anymore although you had been obsessed with music as a kid. The past felt like a different time. Memories of a clunky CD player and wired headphones with the metal arch over your head and those spongey earcups. Now you had wireless earbuds and a phone. Still, you looked over the colorful albums and wondered if you should get one, just to have it or maybe even put it on display. He used to listen to a lot of music too. Probably still did, on planes and in cars. He used to share your taste.
Now you didn’t have to share anything.
You stuck with your favorites, still, for years. It was an ever-growing list of popular artists as well as lesser-known indie artists that you never forgot. You made sure to listen to the top hits as well since those songs were popular for a reason. The occasional earworm could lead you down a pleasant rabbit hole, too.
You picked up an album of a band you liked but had never owned and went home.
Got that dopamine unboxing it and smiling at the photocards. Looked through the extras with the album on repeat playing through your Bluetooth speaker. You didn’t do these kinds of things in front of Jungkook usually. You had always prioritized engaging with him. Listening to his stories, looking at the photos of places he had been, shaking your head at the long hours or difficult call times. Every moment precious because you would never know when it would be cut short.
You had made everything about him when in his presence.
You hadn’t blasted the relationship all over social media although it was obvious. For the most part, people had been respectful. You hadn’t deleted all the photos he was in, the photos he had taken of you, nor had you blocked him. People asked. You repeated the same thing over and over. I’m not going to talk about that. We can talk about something else. People eventually stopped asking. Old news was old news. There was no visible resentment, and so the interest died out.
You caught Jungkook looking at you from across the concessions stand at the movie theater.
Those big dark brown eyes filled with rueful invitation.
You didn’t know what movie he was going into, but you turned away and didn’t think about it much.
Watched the movie you paid for, alone.
Went home.
Alone.
You used to watch movies twice. Once by yourself when it released, then a second time when Jungkook could make it. When he could. Sometimes he couldn’t and the movie was already out of theaters. Then you both would watch it at home when it released on streaming services. It was what it was. You enjoyed movies. You had the time and money to watch them twice. But now you didn’t have to.
That was nice.
You weren’t sure if Jungkook was deliberately going places that you often frequented or if it was coincidence. It was likely the latter, because he usually wasn’t alone. He had a group of friends that lived in this area and often came to visit them. He used to joke that it must have been fate for you to meet as your friend circles didn’t overlap. At least he had not shown up to the video games store or the music store you usually went to, so you didn’t feel threatened in any way. Maybe he was visiting his friends more because he was sad. Maybe he was visiting them more in hopes of seeing you, the same tactic he used when he first asked you out. Maybe it was both.
It was probably both.
Sometimes you would cry in frustration.
Sometimes you would play games to distract yourself.
Sometimes you didn’t mind too much as the days passed. Sometimes you would look outside and admire the sun. Sometimes it would rain and that was nice too. Sometimes you were sad but it wasn’t a negative feeling. Such was the natural course. Sadness was the promise of happiness to come, because one couldn’t exist without the other.
At least, you believed so.
Ther wasn’t much more you could do than that.
For a bit there you had almost thought the relationship hadn’t mattered because you had walked away so coldly. In some ways, you wished you could take it back. In other ways, you didn’t. It was hard to discount years of your life simply because of how the chapter ended. There had definitely been unique experiences that you were unlikely to relive. You used to attend lavish parties with Jungkook, especially many around the holidays. You would dress up in your best and put on a brave face. A lovely dress, the high heels he brought you, carefully done makeup and hair. Jungkook would walk in with you gliding beside him, silently holding his arm. People would tell you how fun it was working with him and how lucky he was to have such a pretty and understanding lady. These were all work events full of unfamiliar faces. Jungkook used to be reserved and hang out with you in corners but, as he got more popular, more people roped him into conversations, remember this, and he would slip in with his friends, naturally, laughing and smiling. You would wait nearby, at yet another party surrounded by better bodies, and somehow he would find you at the end of the night, ask you if you had fun.
And you would smile and assure him.
“Something like that.”
The best parties were the ones thrown by his friend Kim Taehyung. He had been in the entertainment industry for a long time, becoming Jungkook’s friend though their crossed paths in modeling. He had an affliction for celebration and Jungkook was always invited, which meant you, too, bore witness to many magnificent events hosted by him. The most extravagant were his own birthday parties. Quite so, as the date was after Christmas, and he continued the festive mood. Taehyung loved a theme. He would rent specific venues, arrange for live music, impose a dress code, everything. One year, he flew everyone out to Paris and rented an entire restaurant to celebrate. Even if you barely knew anyone there, it was fun being in a different world created by Taehyung’s magical vision. Everyone was thrown into it together, experiencing the vibes of an old American jazz club, the white beaches with glass waters during Christmastime, or a playful night filled with Taehyung’s favorite childhood games and sweet treats, complete with food stalls from the area of Daegu he grew up in.
You didn’t fit in, but no one did because these were all Taehyung’s fantasies brought to life.
He always sent the invitations by physical mail, on stunning stationery to match the theme. Someone else must have created them, but seemingly Taehyung approved them all as every single one contained his unique flourishing signature. You kept them in a box. They were too pretty to throw away.
You had received an invitation this year too, to a midnight masquerade ball, but you didn’t go.
Perhaps he didn’t know yet. Or, perhaps he did know and Jungkook asked him to invite you. They were quite close. If there was a plan, you didn’t take the bait. The date came and went. Maybe Taehyung considered you a friend, but that was probably a stretch. Jungkook didn’t like you talking to Taehyung too much.
Apparently, you made him smile too big.
Or something.
Taehyung had an entire party to get to every time you met him, anyway. You would have to shoo him off because there was very little night and Taehyung wanted to speak to every guest one-on-one. He was sincere like that. He was romantic like that. He was dark and handsome and in his own head, in his constant dream of living his wonderful life that, from what you could discern, he deserved. He even always remembered to ask the staff working at his party to eat cake with them. At the end of the night, Taehyung would pick up the microphone and thank the guests for coming and thank the staff for working hard to provide everyone with a good time. Taehyung always remembered to say thank you and he always made sure to express his gratitude to everyone, no matter their status.
You missed being at his party, a little bit, if only just to witness a fairy-tale in real life.
But you weren’t part of Jeon Jungkook’s world anymore.
And so you missed the party.
Please love me again.
On quiet, grey days, you realized how very boring your life was. On quiet, grey days, you were tempted to think about the good times. About his laugh, about his starry eyes when you came into view, about enchanted nights where you would both make magic between bodies. On quiet, grey days, you were tempted to pick out all his flaws until the memories were burned, images stricken with ash, never to be the same again. On quiet, grey days, you had every chance to run back or run away, at least in your head, but instead you lived your very boring life doing neither of those choices.
Whether you loved him or hated him, the result would still be the same.
You entered the artisan tea shop and greeted the staff. You talked about how your father was into tea, chatted about what would make a good gift. The prices of the sets. The amount of loose-leaf tea and how many cups it would make. The various flavors and strength. You smelled a bunch of different ones. Rejected some, remained indecisive about others, accepted a few as contenders.
You heard the bell by the door chime again, musical and clear.
A male’s voice, deep and polite.
You tensed. Your body knew before your mind caught up. You pointed to several flavors you had liked, and the employee suggested a gift box sampler featuring a watercolor camellia-printed limited-edition teacup set that you agreed to readily, all the while vaguely aware of a tingling behind your neck and a vigilant tension forming in your lungs. But it wasn’t until your name was called that you turned around by instinct, and then froze with recognition. Dark brown eyes under graceful black-brown waves. Tan skin glimmering under the lights. The image completed by a three-piece chocolate brown suit paired with a ruffled warm gray dress shirt and sharp dark leather oxfords. The stylish man smiled widely, box-like, and walked towards you without hesitation.
“Fancy seeing you here.”
Kim Taehyung must have known, and yet.
You bowed lightly. “Hello.”
The sales associate was immediately charmed by Taehyung’s deep voice and dashing appearance, their gloved hands hovering over the half-packed box and openly ogling the demandingly handsome gentleman that took your hand warmly before lightly kissing your knuckles. Straight out of a movie. Probably learned it from one, or from traveling in Europe. He let go after a lingering moment.
He had said your name with the same velvety warmth he had at all of his parties.
It had hurt, but it wasn’t his fault.
“How are you? I haven’t seen you in a while. Are you buying something?” He raised his head and daintily smiled at the employee before giving you his full attention again. “Let me pay for it.”
“No, ah,” you interrupted him quickly, handing over your card before Taehyung could reach into his heavily lined pockets. “No, sorry. I’m buying a gift for my father.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” he apologized immediately, retracting his hands. “I meant to do something nice for you and I’ve overstepped.”
“It’s… It’s alright,” you chuckled softly, trying to dissipate the awkwardness. You turned slightly to sign the receipt, not looking at the price. Your card went back into your black leather bow purse. “You had no way of knowing. How are you? And your parents?”
Taehyung was still a little sheepish but he remained next to you at a respectful distance. “Me? I guess you could say I’m holding on. I think I might take a small break soon and spend a week with my family. How did you know I was thinking of them?” He laughed, shaking his head. “You’re a mind-reader.”
You shook your head with a smile, taking the beautifully wrapped bag and bowing in gratitude to the employee. “No, you’ve just never been a big tea drinker. It was only a guess.”
He scratched the back of his head and sighed lightheartedly. “Ah, you’re right. I wanted to buy a grown-up gift, but maybe I should have asked what they wanted. I don’t know the first thing about tea.”
You both began to walk towards the entrance.
“You’re their adorable child. They will love anything you gift them.”
Taehyung grinned. “So, you think I’m adorable?”
You opened your mouth and then.
Then you were suddenly hyperaware of the brightness of the lights in the tea store. Suddenly aware of all the customers around you milling about and chatting with their friends and the employees. Suddenly the scents of the store were too strong and too varied and suddenly a phantom grip on your arm from a time long past pulled you away from your center, into the past, and you remembered all the times you stood in a corner of a party, on the outskirts of alcohol, music, and magic, wondering why you were so, so alone.
You plastered a smile on your face and replied pleasantly.
“Of course, you are, Kim Taehyung.”
It lasted a second.
Maybe less.
Taehyung gazed at you with curious eyes.
You kept the smile on your face.
He stepped past you and opened the door, gesturing you to walk out before him in the most gentlemanly way, smiling with his eyes crinkling as they usually did when he laughed or was in his comfort zone. “Come. Let me at least treat you to lunch,” he insisted.
You accepted his graciousness and turned as you walked to face him as you spoke. “That’s really not necessary. I’m sure you’re very busy.”
He chuckled, the sound coming deep from his chest. “Of course, I’m busy, but I always have time for a friend.” He shrugged nonchalantly, grinning. “My manager expects this kind of behavior from me anyway.”
You paused, looking up at him. “Friend?”
Flutters of lashes and confusion in dark brown orbs.
“Are we not friends?”
People around you continued walking, giving you and Taehyung weird looks. He didn’t seem to notice, undeterred by the world around him that wasn’t currently in his focus, the main character at every moment in his life, oblivious to anyone trying to get under his skin with their judgements, never the accessory to someone else.
It turned out to be more difficult than you thought, saying the words.
“I… well… Don’t you know that Jeon Jungkook and I aren’t dating anymore?”
Taehyung tilted his head with childlike innocence.
“Um… so you don’t eat lunch anymore?”
You blinked at him.
“Huh?”
He gave you this look. You stared back. For a moment the disconnect was so tangible that you almost had a word for it. A zephyr ruffled Taehyung’s soft curls. The sun made his skin glow and his dark eyes sparkle. Small signs of Mother Nature affectionately acknowledging one of her children. He smiled. It was then that you realized this was a decision you could make. A decision of a lonely self, not a lonely self that was an extension of another. A yes or no that didn’t have to be polluted by the past.
“Well…”
Your hands tightened on the straps of the gift bag.
“If you’ll have me.”
Taehyung grinned. “I know just the spot! You’ll love it.”
-
It was nice lunch.
No, it was wonderful time.
You had been worried that you would be underdressed in your calf-length flowy black dress and chunky knit lavender cardigan, but you fit right in. Taehyung had picked a busy rooftop brunch spot. It was French-themed, or at least as French as Korea could get. There was a bit more wood than brass and crystals. It still made for a nice hideaway. It seemed Taehyung was well recognized here, and yet people maintained a distance regardless. It must have been his polite yet stern demeanor. When he sat down though, he seemed to relax, waving a hand and telling you to order whatever you liked.
You never could turn down good brioche.
You thought it would have been awkward, at least. It wasn’t. He talked about his work, asked about yours. Asked what you thought about this or that. Memories from past events, what you liked or didn’t like. What he paid too much for that nobody noticed, along with a hearty laugh, and moments he loved, such as having a group photo at every one of his events. You asked him if he enjoyed planning the events themselves. He confessed with a roughish smile that he had a planner for all those details. You thought it strange to spend so much money on such occasions, but there was something pure about it too. Besides, you ended up getting your answer.
“What’s the most important lesson in your life you’ve learned so far?” Taehyung abruptly asked, sitting up in alarm.
You blinked at his suddenness. “Uh… I don’t know. I would have to think about it.” Your lips upturned slightly, then you tilted your head and looked back at him. “What about you? What’s the most important lesson you’ve learned in your life so far?”
He relaxed back in his chair. His expression became pensive. You paused in mid-bite, seeing him look a bit sheepish.
“You’re not the first person to ask me about the parties,” Taehyung chuckled deep from his chest. “A lot of people tell me it’s a waste of money. And it is to other people, but it isn’t to me. The most important lesson I’ve ever learned was…”
He raised his head with a small smile.
“You can’t get time back.”
You remembered the extensive decor, the delicate hors d'oeuvres, even the various perfumes sprayed into the air complimenting the theme of each party. Exquisite and memorable details. Taehyung ticked his head, seemingly recalling it all too.
“I think I’ve mentioned this, but my grandmother was the closest maternal figure I had,” he explained, fondly smiling. “I’m close to my parents too, but they had to work a lot to give me a good life, so I spent a lot of time with my siblings and grandparents. My grandmother used to hold celebrations for the achievements I had, even if they were mediocre or not that impressive. Nothing extravagant, or anything. A little cake or my favorite sweets. She would sing for me and clap her hands. She would say, it’s my duty to give you good memories. As I got older, I became busy, of course, chasing dreams, and I didn’t make time for her small celebrations any more. I was just out of university when she passed away. I often think I hadn’t spent enough time with her. Time is money, as they say. Next time, I would say, until there wasn’t a next time.”
The weight of his words settled on the table.
“It’s not your fault,” you reminded him, but Taehyung simply smiled and shook his head.
“It wasn’t anybody’s fault,” he agreed. “But that wasn’t it. I couldn’t get all that time back. Sure, did I take jobs that put me in a really good place now? Yeah. Yeah, of course, I make a lot of money now since young me jumped at every chance to model for a small brand or do a single-run commercial. I really love my career. I love that, because I did the hard work, I even get offers to act in primetime dramas now. But I should have made less. I should have made time. I should have gone to see her and let her do her duty to give me good memories.”
He waved his hands in a slight shrug. You could tell he was still regretful about it, but there was something else too. He looked directly at you with that boxy grin of his.
“I decided, then, that I too  wanted to give good memories to the people that are precious to me. I have all this money, anyway. Why waste it on things? I want to waste it on memories. I want people to look forward to special days, to celebrate life, to look back on a fun time.”
So that was why.
“That is what is really important to me.”
Kim Taehyung wasn’t only good looks, of course.
“I’ve yapped long enough. What is really important to you?” he asked again, chuckling.
“Oh, I…”
And there were no words.
You straightened, startled by your own silence. There were lots of important things, weren’t there? There was… and there wasn’t. Friends, sure. And, also, friends came in and out of your life. You didn’t take it personally. Family, yes. Cordial but not deep. They had their own lives to live. You almost opened your mouth to say these generic things, and then you caught the look in Taehyung’s eye and stopped.
This basic question was not so basic after all.
“I… Am I boring?” you blurted with a start.
“Boring?” Taehyung frowned. “No, you’re not.”
Your brows furrowed. “Aren’t I?”
He laughed, hearty and deep. “Trust me. You’re not boring. We wouldn’t be having a conversation if you were boring.”
Your eyes narrowed suspiciously. “Why are we having a conversation?”
Taehyung smiled warmly.
“Because I appreciate your outlook on life.”
You were taken aback.
“What?”
He nodded. “Isn’t it obvious?” He waved a hand carelessly. “I’ve met so many people doing what I do. Some people are just nice to you because of money. Or think you can boost their reputation. Or they think they can take advantage of you. You’ve been around all that too, no?” He did not mention Jungkook.
“Oh, well…” you hesitated. “Not anymore. I’m pretty ordinary.”
A small frown. “No, everyone is extraordinary.”
You scoffed. “I’m only an accountant. Not even one that works closely with my own clients – I’m just the one at the firm that does the final review over everyone’s work to make sure we don’t get into legal trouble. That’s nothing like what you do.”
He impatiently swept your words away. “Everyone is extraordinary,” he repeated.
“I don’t think–”
“You are different,” Taehyung pressed. “You had been introduced to a different world than your own and you could have been a vulture. You could have taken for your own sake. You could have done everything you could to be ‘one of us’. You could have scorned us too, called it all superficial and stupid. But you didn’t.” He crossed his arms to make his point. “You observed. You listened. You treated me, the people around me, everyone as their own person. We weren’t just some dumb rich people to you. We were individuals.”
You didn’t know what to say. It wasn’t something you had ever consciously thought about before.
“There are so many people that believe in using others, either in a beneficial way or in a cruel way,” sighed Taehyung. “It’s a difficult world. We all need to live.” He reached over and made you jump by placing his hand over the back of yours. “Don’t give up on that, okay?”
Your stared at him with wide eyes. “On… what?”
Almost. You didn’t quite have an answer for the most important lesson in your life you had learned so far. But almost. Kim Taehyung cocooned his palm over your hand and trapped you with his determined brown eyes, straight from a drama scene. A heavenly prince in a fancy café. He looked back to you very seriously, taking all of your attention away from the whispering conversations on other tables, away from the clinking plates and glasses, away from all distractions.
“Don’t give up on the way you want to live.”
Those small moments.
From eating dinner alone to watching movies alone to buying that album and unboxing it yourself to looking outside, days and nights, wondering what could have been and killing that thought over and over again.
“The way… I want to live?” you echoed breathlessly.
The clear, musical chime of the bell by the entrance sang through the air, mingling with the conversation and consumption. A halo of sound that rang true over every table to reach every customer. It was as striking as it was lovely, flawlessly melding into the moment. A pure sound that could trigger a pleasant déjà vu, the recall of a good chat over good food.
Taehyung grinned with his beautiful, perfectly white teeth.
“I want you to have good memories. Whatever you decide, let us make good memories with those precious to us.”
You decided, then and there, that you needed to start doing things.
-
“Oh, good, you’re home. That would have been awfully embarrassing.”
“W-What…?”
You backed up in your slippers as a stunningly well-dressed man flourished into your home like an astronaut landing on the moon. That was, if the moon was your front door. The black mat was space-themed, printed with abstract stars and a grayish circle. It wasn’t entirely inaccurate. Your pajamas were also soft black cotton with a twinkly star print, although your slippers were simple, white furry poofs that felt like walking on clouds.
“Take this.”
“What is – oof!”
In contrast to your outfit, the man who had entered your home looked like he had stepped off the runway. He wore light blue trousers that you almost mistook for jeans, however they had a tone-on-tone print that clearly indicated the luxury designer. Underneath the navy-blue duster coat was a crisp white shirt pressed to the gods with distinctive sky-blue trim. A quick glimpse and anyone would know the inner lining of the duster was blue silk, the matching tone-on-tone print subtle and obvious at the same time. You nearly buckled under the weight of a wooden box, gasping as you saw the slices of high-grade beef in a gold bow. The man gestured with his hand in a swooping manner.
“I heard all about it from Taehyung,” he was saying, shrugging his broad shoulders heavily.
“Heard…?” You were still reeling from the unexpected guest and a box of meat. “What’s this, I can’t accept th–”
The man shot you a scathing look. “Don’t be ridiculous,” he chided, dismissive. “How unbelievably rude I would be dropping by your home if I didn’t have a gift? Psh, why, I wouldn’t be Kim Seokjin!”
And so he was.
Although, as far as you knew, you and famous-actor-turned-businessman Kim Seokjin were not close friends. Not close enough to be gifted with a house call and meat, anyway. He had been close to Jeon Jungkook back then. They often sought each other out when they both attended the same events. You were well aquatinted with Seokjin’s boisterous personality and his worldwide-known handsomeness. He was no different today, looking sculpted from jawline to broad shoulders to the regal way he stood. Glowing skin. Lightly permed, chestnut brown hair. Full lips, currently in a slight frown.
You bowed awkwardly. “S-Sorry, I just didn’t expect…”
“Ah, it’s alright.” He called you by name, although somewhat awkwardly, as if he was unsure if he should be more formal or not. “I won’t take too much of your time.”
You were still confused about Seokjin saying he had heard something from Taehyung. Actually, you didn’t even know how he got your address, although it wasn’t impossible. After all, Taehyung’s party invitations came in snail mail. It wasn’t that shocking. You probably might have been more annoyed if you were in the middle of something, but all you had been doing was getting ready to heat up some leftover takeout. You shuffled slightly, trying to block the view of the kitchen counter. Not necessarily embarrassed, per se, as your apartment was quite spacious and neat, but nothing here was comparable to Kim Seokjin’s lifestyle. It was kind of pointless to do so, though, since Seokjin was quite tall.
He seemed not to notice or care about the current state of your kitchen.
You stood there, dazed, clutching a box of high-grade beef.
He cleared his throat very firmly. “I came to invite you to the opening of my new establishment. Two weeks from now.” He rattled off the opening date. “But don’t come on opening day. It’ll be too crowded. Some day after. Let me know when and I’ll make special arrangements for you,” he added, stepping forward to tuck his business card into one of the folds of the gold bow. “Call the number on there. My assistant will connect me to you. I can link you with talented professionals if you are interested, which I’ll pay for, of course.”
“I– What – I’m sorry?” you sputtered. “Me?”
The handsome man exaggeratedly whipped his head from side to side. “Uh, do I see anyone else? Yes, of course, you,” he affirmed gruffly. “I came to invite you in person.”
“Well…” This must be how deer felt when confronted with headlights. “I’m not trying to be rude, but, uh… why?”
Seokjin looked offended. “Why? So you can meet people, silly.”
You struggled to connect the information given to you but he was not making it easy. “Meet people?”
“Yes,” he tutted. “You want to meet people, don’t you?”
Did you? You gave him a confused look.
“As Taehyung said,” Seokjin continued as if you completely understood. “People like you need to be surrounded by good people. And I happen to know a lot of them. We need people like you in this industry.”
You shook your head. “No, I don’t have any intention of–”
“Precisely.” He barreled on as if your front entryway was his own stage. “That is precisely why.”
Silence.
A bird cawed outside.
“H… Hah?”
Something in his expression softened. You almost forgot the weight of the wood box in your hands. You almost forgot the ridiculousness of you in your pajamas and Kim Seokjin in his luxury designer clothes. You almost forgot that you were in a completely different class, completely out of your element, completely ordinary.
He sighed and slipped his hands into his pants pockets, neatly tucking back his coat. “Look, I understand if you absolutely don’t want to have anything to do with me and the others. I don’t blame you. But,” he added, nodding lightly. “Your presence is missed. I do believe your interactions with those around you have done them a world of good. Maybe not everyone, yes, but you’re still spoken of, even now.”
“What…?” You blinked, doubtful. “Really?”
Seokjin chuckled, nodding. “You are good company.”
You thought all those times. All those events, dinners, parties. You mostly remembered Jungkook letting you be. Sure, you had light conversation with those around you. You couldn’t remember all their faces. They had been simple conversations, you thought, but they weren’t superficial once you really thought about it. You didn’t have basic industry chatter to talk about, so instead you had asked about aspirations. Asked why instead of what. Why acting? Why modeling? Why entertainment? Talks of the past, the present, the future. Pretty normal, you thought, but maybe…
Maybe it was more normal to ask what they were achieving.
Maybe it wasn’t so normal to ask who someone was.
“Anyway,” Seokjin coughed, breaking you out of your daze. “I wanted to give you ample time to think about it.”
“More than two weeks?” you mused.
He waved a hand. “Don’t know about you, but I need time to schedule and plan things. I need time to get myself ready to interact,” he muttered, half-joking and half-bitterly.
The meat was getting heavy. “Ah… What’s the dress code?”
“Aish, didn’t I tell you?” Seokjin tapped the side of his head. “Think about it. Then give me a call, and I’ll arrange for hair and makeup and fashion. No, don’t even bother asking about price. I’m inviting you to introduce you to people, so I am paying. End of discussion. And…”
A loaded pause.
Tick of the head and Seokjin very seriously asked you.
“If Jeon Jungkook is there, will you be fine?”
You answered honestly.
“I don’t think it will be an issue.”
He surveyed you for a long second and then nodded.
“Alright. Let me know when you’ve decided. Have a nice night. Don’t hesitate to contact me if I can help in some way. I’m not a stranger. By the way.” He added one last comment before leaving, spinning back around with a hand on your now open door and the other pointing to the side of the box. “The butcher shop I purchased this from is owned by a friend of mine. Make sure to send your family and friends his way once you taste how delicious and high-quality it is.”
-
You walked into the nightclub, oddly at peace among the blaring music and bustling bodies, stepping into a world of light and dark and pushing boundaries.
The past couple hours had been spent in a chair, fussed over by a detailed makeup artist and equally talented hairdresser. It had been more enjoyable than you originally thought. Perhaps it had been Seokjin’s excellent choices or their own expertise. They even both asked for your input and offered their advice. It felt like a joint effort. Even the fashion stylist who came later was as informative as they were considerate. You had found out that they had taken your name and your photos to have your fortune read and performed color analysis, respectively. That explained why Seokjin had asked you to take those plain photos. This had made color and style selection much simpler, as you naturally liked all the choices. You were no stranger to tight outfits, although this type of nightlife was not the kind of place you frequented. The stylist had brought a rack of choices, and just in case, a black slip dress looks good on everyone, and all of them were compelling in one way or another. All nightclub appropriate. You asked what to try first. The stylist had asked you how you were feeling.
Feeling?
The answer came out before you could stop it.
“Like revenge.”
You had laughed it off, and so had the staff, but you had seen the gleam in their eyes as if they, too, relished in being part of this so-called revenge.
Well, they were.
You weren’t perfectly sure if this was actual revenge yet, no. You were certainly dressed for it. Black lace corset. Tight lilac short skirt. Black patent leather jacket cropped so severely that it was nearly a bolero. Delicate black pumps with a thin ankle strap. The kind that was a bit fiddly to get on, but was worth it in the end. There was a power in this type of outfit, the kind that made you hold your head high and walk alone with confidence. Perhaps similar to a superhero costume. Just as impractical, too, heh. But that was okay. You weren’t here to prevent any crimes.
Just commit them.
Maybe.
In any case, you weren’t even sure what was going to happen tonight. Something had been planned for you, so you walked in and looked around, wondering if you should ask for help. The luxury was obvious from every corner of the building. From the furniture choices to the expansive bar to the crisp, pressed uniforms of the employees, every detail oozed sophistication. You admired the tastefulness of it, surprised that it didn’t feel gaudy or overdone. Must be the refined touch of Kim Seokjin. Even the clientele was jaw-dropping. You spared a moment to look from face to face, wondering if you should be less obvious about it, but then some paused and gazed back, unafraid, offering a simple smile.
They didn’t know you didn’t really belong, yet.
The sheep’s clothing worked, then.
You almost laughed at your own unspoken joke, and then, either compelled by fate, chance, or some mixture of both, your eyes rose and you saw him. It was definitely him. It was only the back of his head and black leather, but you knew it was him even before he turned around.
Jeon Jungkook.
You had seen him many times after the fact. However, this time was the first time that you came with weapons at your disposal, subtle as they were. For a moment, you wondered what to do. You stared as those brooding dark eyes widened in surprise. His hair was slicked back. Leather jacket, white tank, dark jeans, probably black boots. You couldn’t see it all from this angle. Still, you knew him too well. He wasn’t a suit-and-tie breed unless he was forced by the occasion. And, anyway.
You had mildly hoped that he would dress down these days, as it both suited him and reflected your preferred personal taste.
Egotistical, yes, and, now that you could see, true.
You broke the gaze first, seeing a waiter approach you. Bowed lightly, walking with him as he explained what was in store tonight, and yet your mind was still fixated on that shocked gaze from the far table up above. It did register that you were going up the stairs too, but somehow you knew that you weren’t going near that table.
You wondered if he regretted everything.
You wondered if he saw you differently now, dressed up and on a mission.
You wondered if Jeon Jungkook understood, truly, how deeply he had hurt you with his misdemeanors and you wondered if you, truly, understood how you didn’t help by always sweeping said misdemeanors under the metaphorical rug. You wondered if there was a chance for reconciliation or if this was all a big mistake. Maybe this was only another instance of two ships silently passing in the night. A pair of parallel lines that would never intersect. Or… would this become a pattern that could only be completed by intersection?
Whichever one it was, it was going to be evident tonight.
You raised your head, seeing a champagne bottle and another of expensive liquor.
“Are you ready?”
Your eyes shifted and you smiled up at the waitress.
“Yes, I am.”
She smiled and bowed her way out. Revenge. You savored the word. You had never thought of it that way, but then again that was because you always believed in the higher road. In enduring. That was how strength was formed. Vindication was unladylike and uncouth. Or so the story goes. You became aware that you were being watched.
I don’t belong here.
You twisted your body and stared directly into Jeon Jungkook’s eyes.
He pivoted away immediately. Unable to hold your gaze. Ashamed, probably. You pondered quietly. He brought you into this. All this around you – beauty, opulence, and the shadows between gold. Even without him, your connection to these people remained because his friends believed in you for some reason. You agreed, because maybe there was still something here for you.
But that was no reason to believe that you belonged here nor to act like it.
You realized, suddenly, that some part of you still thought you had to keep up the front.
“Excuse me.”
You looked up to a man who had the expression of a pleased kitty cat. His eyes disappeared from his smile. Radiant, cream skin. Long, bleached-blond hair that was half-tied back from his face but still skimmed along his shoulders. He wore a suit and tie, perfectly tailored, and was noticeably shorter than nearly everyone here. Then again, almost everyone here was a model, in high heels, or both.
“Did I interrupt?” he asked lightly, his intonation hinting at a Busan dialect.
“Oh, no,” you answered with a shake of your head. “I’m sorry. That was rude of me to space out like that. Please, sit down.”
The man laughed behind his hand before pulling out the chair and sitting down. He had elegant fingers that reminded you of a pianist. “It was cute,” he commented, somewhat shyly, before turning away and clearing his throat. He faced you once again, composed now, and bowed in greeting, stating his name.
You hurriedly did the same.
“I hope I’m not thinking too highly of myself by sitting here with you.”
You shook your head. “No, no. I want this to be an open invitation.” You poured him a glass of liquor to start off the night. He had a noticeable presence. Not a towering one, rather, as someone who knew himself well. Still, you could sense an introverted soul. “Don’t feel too pressured. I only want to ask a question.”
His eyebrows raised, curious. “A question?”
You smiled. “Yes. And I want you to promise to answer honestly.”
His lips upturned thoughtfully. There was something playful about his expressions. Very cute. Perhaps unintentional. “A promise right away to a stranger?”
You allowed yourself a little mischief. “Do I look like I could hurt anyone?”
The man across the table caught the bait and toyed with it. An expert. “Maybe. But that doesn’t mean It wouldn’t be pleasant.” He smiled again, with that same kitty cat contentment, and nodded. “Okay, I’m ready to tell the truth. You only get one chance. Use it well.” His tone teased, but his voice was sincere.
The question.
You stared into a stranger’s eyes and asked.
“What is the most important lesson in your life you’ve learned so far?”
-
i hear... | ... the whispers... | ... in your eyes.
--
masterpost
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Text
Prewar!Cooper Howard has a breeding kink because he loves being a dad. He and Barb married and started trying for kids later in life than most folks around them, so much of the sex they had, especially early on, was focused on getting Barb pregnant. If he'd had his way, they would have had a whole litter of children, but hey, sometimes life doesn't work out the way you want. Still, there's the fun of trying, and there was a lot of trying. After the divorce, he's shocked when he meets someone else, and even more shocked when he feels those same urges with you. He's been trained to try and knock one in basically every time, he jokes.
At least, that's what he tells himself.
He's also incredibly possessive, and it drives him wild to think about getting to see you all swollen and filled out with his child. Particularly with you being younger that him; the ugly part of his brain is barking at him to stake a more permanent claim on you every time a guy your age so much as looks your way. Personally, he thinks he's too old to have more kids, but between his secret urges, your forgetfulness when it comes to your pill, and your twin high sex drives, well...sometimes accidents happen.
He'd be over the moon, once he knew you were happy as well (he would also worry about the news potentially being hurtful to Barb, but that'd be an issue for tomorrow). Showing you off in public, knowing that other people see how gorgeous you are and know you fully belong to him, it really gets him going, and you certainly take notice of how amorous he is when you're out together (combined with how vigorously he fucks you when you get home). Thinks you're insanely sexy pregnant and likes to watch you ride him with a big belly. You'd both better be a lot more careful about your contraception after the first baby if you don't want another, because getting to see you that way only makes his kink worse.
The Ghoul has a breeding kink because he's incredibly possessive. It's been literal centuries since he's come across anything in this world that he cares for enough to want to claim it, and you're officially claimed. He wants everyone, including you, to know that you belong to him and only him. Other ghouls can smell him on you much more strongly if he cums inside you, and he enjoys the way filling you full scratches his most primal itch. It's just an added benefit that he's almost positive he can't actually get you pregnant, but...there are records of ghouls reproducing with other ghouls. Haven't stranger things happened?
The little thrill he gets at the idea is just nature trying to take over.
At least, that's what he tells himself.
You'd be hard-up to get him to admit it, but he wants you to need him. He wants an excuse to baby you and pamper you and force you to let him do things for you without the vulnerability of admitting that he wants to do those things for you anyway because he's deeply in love with you.
You complain that your feet hurt during your journey for the day? He'll carry you everywhere you want to go from now until the end of time, if that's what you want. Stomach and appetite troubles? Name whatever you want, he'll find it for you, no matter how many caps he has to pay. Tired? "Of course you're tired, sweetheart. Let's stop for today. Here, sit down. Do you need some water? Eat this, you need some calories. Let me rub your legs and feet for you." It is endless and sort of surreal for you to adjust to.
Speaking of journeys, I think he also secretly wants to settle down a bit. He does already after he meets and falls for you, seeing how much the constant trekking back and forth across the irradiated desert takes out of you, and he definitely would want to do so expeditiously if you were pregnant. It's not like secure places don't exist in this world. He can keep you, and anyone else who may come along, safe just fine.
He'd be afraid to fuck you if you were pregnant, worried that he'll hurt you or make you sick or make something bad happen with the pregnancy. But if you reassure him, maybe beg a little, he'll do his best to make sure your urges are satisfied. Sit on his face and let him slide his tongue through your insanely sensitive folds, lie back and let him fuck you with those agile fingers while he jerks himself off. You'll miss being properly penetrated, badly, but you won't go without.
He wants an excuse to be even more protective of you than usual. Give him a reason to literally pluck men's eyes out for daring to so much as look at you, a reason to never let you out of his sight ever again. If you thought he was ready to commit violence to keep you safe before, you haven't seen anything yet.
I can't imagine it would be easy to have a big family in the Wasteland, but reminding him how much he loves being a dad would certainly have the thought on his mind.
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jakesangel · 17 hours
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sick jake ><
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what jake wants jake gets but sick jake ? it will be the end for you. either that he pretends to be unable to do anything or is hyper, he would give you the time of your life.
when he gets his mouth ulcer, he knows the medecine will hurt him more so he wouldn't stop moving making it hard for the members of the staff to heal him. they even had to tie him up. but once you're in his life ? ? he would do it on purpose just to get you to heal him. he would whine out loud not caring of the situation or the place he is. he would jump around not wanting to be tied up again. he just doesn't want anyone else to heal him. he is all yours, why would him ? so when sunghoon had the idea to call you over, he was so happy. the happiest, he would grin so hard, making everyone in the room realized of his true intentions. but even if he didn't, he was suddenly patently waiting for you, sitting on the dance practice couch, a contrast from few seconds ago.
once you arrive w the members telling you what's happening and giving you the médecine, you would see a jake already looking at you, sitting w his legs moving around, his body buzzing of excitement. his smile would get bigger when he sees you approching with the medecine. he knows it will hurt, but knowing you'd be the one healing him, eases him. hi would he says w the biggest grin, you know you didn't have time come here, not even hiding the biggest lie he ever told you. he would grab your hands, leading you on his lap and then, put them on your thighs, lovingly strocking them, while you'd open the medecine. could you hold my face while you'll do it, princess ? he would expendantly ask, his face held high, eyes round to look at you only. please ?
but when jake is having a cold, he will act like a baby. he would either come over or beg u through text for you to come to him. he wouldn't even open the front door, pretending that he can't get out of his bed. he'd prepare himself : once you open the door he will cough n pretend his voice is roak, but it never works. once he his the door opens, he knows he won. he knows you are going to baby him and that he has you, all for himself, and maybe you'd even stay for the night. so every single time, he would smile so big once he sees you. and it is an endearing sight to see : he had himself wrapped up in his blanket, his head the only thing that can be seen. my princess finally came to save me, he'd dramatically say. kiss me i'm literally to die !, if he is contagious you'll obviously try to protest making him only whine louder so that's it. that's how i'm going ? without even a kiss from my princess. oh life hates me, or just negotiate with you please, baby ? i promise you ill take such good care of you if you do get sick. please ?
sick jake will not use hands. he would keep them under the blanket waiting for you to feed him, either food or the medicine. so when you're so close to him, on his bed, feeding him, he keeps it cool finally getting what he wants.he'd stop trying to kiss you but only opening and closing his mouth only when the spoon is approaching or leaving his face. jake would only move when he knows you guys will cuddle. so when you come back from the kitchen, his dishes on the sink, he'd have the blanket open for you. babe, could you touch my hair while we watch a movie, please ? he'd confide you. and that's only then he will fall asleep, your chest is pressed by his back, your hand on his hair.
notes : jake politely asking is making me insane but he is the cutest puppy he would so do this :(
@imaluckygirl @luvj4key @heeseungswifefr @stwrjvke @goldenretrieverjakezgirlbaby @jaeyunpinkyring
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m1ckeyb3rry · 1 day
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hi mira can i pls req a sae x reader and it’s like falling in love with someone. like you know that feeling when you’re really getting to know someone and it sounds like a soft song
i love uu take care x
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── SEABIRD
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Synopsis: Thanks to a chance encounter on the beach, you spend your vacation trying to apologize to the famous soccer player you inadvertently offended. Unfortunately, Sae Itoshi has other plans.
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Event Masterlist
Pairing: Sae x Reader
Chapter Word Count: 11.6k
Content Warnings: love at first sight, fluff, humor, teasing as a love language, sae does not understand emotions or relationships but he’s rich asf, reader has a little brother and loves eating, meet-cutes, summer romance, SEAGULLS
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A/N: although sae is a difficult character for me to get a hold of, i ended up having fun with this LMAO as i’m sure you can tell by the massive word count 😭 i hope he’s not horribly ooc or anything and that this is kind of what you were looking for anon!! tysm for requesting and ily too <3
Additional: part of my 500 follower event! see the event description and rules to make a request of your own.
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You tried to evaluate the series of choices you had made which had led to you lying atop a boy with green eyes and sand smeared across his cheeks, a blank expression on his face despite the way you were literally sprawled over him.
First: your family had decided to spend your summer vacation in Spain. This was innocuous and broad enough, considering how large the country was, so you concluded that your brother’s desire to practice his rudimentary Spanish in a more realistic setting than his high school classroom could not be blamed for your plight.
Second: your father had gotten a great deal on rooms in a luxury beachfront hotel. He was like a bloodhound when it came to haggling and discounts, so it wasn’t a surprise that you were staying in such a nice place for a relatively cheap price — and with a complimentary breakfast every morning, too! Anyways, the hotel had its own private pool that you could’ve been lounging around beside, so that probably wasn’t the cause, either.
Third: your mother had told you that the beach within walking distance of the hotel was famous for its smooth waters and pale sand. You had to visit at least once, according to her and every other travel guide written about the region, but since no one had wanted to go with you, you had decided to go alone, bringing a book, a bottle of sunscreen, and a blanket with you, throwing a dress on over your swimsuit and preparing yourself to spend the entire day soaking in the sun’s rays. This was definitely a contributor to your current predicament, although considering the miles of beach that stretched out in both directions as far as the eye could see where you could’ve been instead of right there, it wasn’t the sole factor.
Fourth: you had thought you would get hungry at some point and had had the foresight to bring a sandwich with you. That was definitely the reason. If only you hadn’t been so concerned with your stomach! If only you had just sucked it up and made the trek back to the hotel upon feeling peckish instead of being so lazy and planning ahead, you wouldn’t be in this situation.
“Can you get off of me?” the boy groaned.
“I am so sorry!” you said, scrambling to your feet and offering him your hand. He did not take it, standing on his own and doing his best to wipe the sand from his face. Then he shook his head like a dog, shaking out the grittiness from his soft hair. “I’m really sorry. I was just running so fast, and I was so worried about my sandwich that I didn’t notice you were there until it was too late!”
“Sandwich?” he said. A few paces away, a seagull landed, the remnants of your lunch held in its beak. You and the boy watched as it tilted its head back, swallowing the last few bites before cawing at you in satisfaction.
“You pig!” you shouted, pointing at it, the boy beside you temporarily forgotten as you fumed over the loss. It cocked its head at you. “That was mine!”
“Ah,” the boy said. “Your sandwich.”
The seagull hopped towards you, like it was teasing you or something, and you screeched before diving at it. Satisfied with the mischief it had caused and the food it had stolen, as well as with making a fool out of you, the seagull took wing, flying well out of reach and leaving you facedown on the ground, your stomach grumbling sadly and emptily.
A foot nudged against your rib cage. “Hey. Sandwich girl. You’re not concussed, are you?”
Being referred to as sandwich girl was so humiliating that you were instantly pushing yourself into a sitting position, folding your arms across your chest as you gazed up at the boy, who still wore that same unimpressed expression from when you had barreled into him.
“No,” you said.
“That’s great,” he said, though he did not sound particularly concerned nor relieved. “Mind elaborating a bit more on why you ran me over? You could’ve seriously injured me, and then you would’ve been in a bunch of trouble.”
“You would’ve been in a bunch of trouble,” you mocked, making your voice high and smarmy. “Jeez, what are you, some kind of celebrity or something? I ran you over because I was taking a break from reading my book, and I realized that I was hungry. Well, luckily, I had brought a sandwich along with me, so it wasn’t a huge deal. I was just about ready to dig in, when that fat pig of a bird swooped down and stole it right out of my hands! The gall! The shamelessness! It was definitely laughing at me, and I can’t stand anyone who laughs at me, so naturally I took off in pursuit, and, uh, that’s how I ended up crashing into you. Though you really should’ve been paying more attention, too. What’s so fascinating about the horizon that you just blocked out the rest of the world for it?”
“I like looking at the ocean,” he said. “But, wait. What do you mean, some kind of celebrity? Don’t you know who I am?”
You gave him a once-over. He was tall, though not impressively so, and definitely well-muscled. His hair was a warm shade, and his green eyes were framed with long eyelashes that fluttered every time he blinked. A pair of sunglasses was perched atop the crown of his head, and the top few buttons of his white shirt were undone, lending him a breezy appearance.
“You’re not handsome enough to be an actor, so that can’t be it,” you said, chewing on your lower lip in thought. “Plus, I’ve seen a bunch of movies, and I’m pretty sure you haven’t been in any of them, so if you were in the film industry, you’d be a D-lister at best, and there’s no way you’d want to flex that kind of status.”
He furrowed his brow, the first hint of a different expression than the one he had kept for the entirety of your very brief acquaintance. “What?”
“What else are people famous for?” you said. “Oh! Are you a singer or something? Were you in that one boy band from a few years ago? I’m sorry, I was too busy having a ‘not-like-other-girls’ phase when they were popular, so I never got into them. I’m over the phase now, if you were wondering, but that would be why I didn’t recognize you.”
“You are amazingly off the mark,” he said.
“I am? I’m kind of out of ideas at this point, though. Can I have a hint or something?” you said.
“Do you watch soccer?” he said. You made a face.
“Hell no,” you said. His eye twitched, so you hurried to elaborate. “My little brother is obsessed with it, so by law, I’m required to hate everything related to the sport. Do you have any siblings? You’d get it if you did.”
“Ask your brother about Sae Itoshi,” he said.
“Okay,” you said, drafting a text to your brother and sending it when you had deemed it to be a perfect blend of uninterested and cool while also underscoring the urgency of the request. “So, your name’s Sae Itoshi? I’m Y/N L/N! I’m not a celebrity, though. If you text anyone and ask them about me, they’ll probably be pretty confused.”
“Yeah, I got that impression,” he said. Your phone vibrated in your hand, and when you looked at the notification, you saw that it was from your brother.
uglier sibling: no shit i know about sae itoshi. he’s that one super talented midfielder on re al. he’s dad and i’s fav player atm.
You gulped, glancing up at Sae before returning to your phone.
me: lol wtf is re al.
uglier sibling: it’s madrid’s team lmfaooo dumbass how do you not know that
uglier sibling: actually wait why are u even asking lol
uglier sibling: did u meet him or something
me: funny story actually!
uglier sibling: WHAT
uglier sibling: y/n are u with sae itoshi rn.
uglier sibling: y/n answer pls
uglier sibling: can you at least get his autograph for me or smth???
Pretending like you were still texting your brother, you typed the name Sae Itoshi into your phone’s search engine. The photos that came up matched the boy in front of you, and the news articles made your heart pound. He actually was a celebrity, and furthermore, his earlier arrogance was deserved. If you had somehow injured such a famous player and put him out of commission for the season, then you really would’ve been done for. It hadn’t been an exaggerated sense of self-importance but an honest evaluation of himself.
“Ahem,” you said, feigning a cough to appear dignified and mature. “It seems like you are a pretty well-known soccer player, Mr. Itoshi.”
“It seems like I am,” he said.
“My brother and dad are big fans, apparently,” you said.
“Good thing you didn’t take me out permanently, then, or I’m sure they would’ve been pretty disappointed,” he said.
You cringed. “I’m sorry again.”
“Whatever. I won’t hold it against you; all’s well that ends well, after all,” he said.
“I feel really bad, though,” you said, rubbing the back of your neck sheepishly. “Is there any way I can make it up to you?”
“You didn’t do anything, so there’s nothing to make up for,” he said.
“Not true! I knocked you over and said you’re not handsome!” you said. “I’d say that warrants some kind of recompense.”
“It’ll warrant more recompense if you keep saying it,” he said.
“You agree that you deserve payment, then? Great! Um…how about I…buy you lunch?” you said, the insistent pangs of your stomach reminding you that you still hadn’t eaten.
“Is food the only thing you can think about?” he said.
“For your information, it is not, but I haven’t eaten since the morning, so I’m hungry,” you said.
“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” he said. “It’s okay. I’m not interested, and just so you know, I’ve been asked out by plenty of girls, but by far, this has been the lamest attempt.”
You supposed, looking back, that it did seem like that was your end goal. But, of course, it had been nothing of the sort; you were just planning on going to eat yourself and thought that you might as well kill two birds with one stone. It was just your luck that he had twisted your words into such a request, though! How were you supposed to maneuver yourself out of this position? If you denied it furiously, then it would seem like you were just ashamed at getting caught, but if you didn’t say anything, then it would be akin to agreeing with his accusation.
There was only one way out of it, and even though you were usually opposed to lying, and even more opposed to bullying others, it was the only thing you could think of. So, bowing your head, you clasped your hands together in front of your heart.
“I’m sorry, but you’re not my type, Mr. Itoshi,” you said. “Like I said, you’re really not that handsome. Also, I’m into tall guys.”
That was how you found yourself sitting across from Sae Itoshi in a private booth at a fancy restaurant, your hands trembling as you read over the menu items and their associated prices.
“I’m in the mood for steak,” Sae said, stroking his chin and setting down his menu, interlacing his fingers and raising his eyebrows at you. “What about you?”
“Steak is a dinner item, don’t you think?” you said, your head spinning at the fact that he had picked the most expensive thing that was served at the entire establishment. “It’s lunchtime.”
“I’m an athlete,” he said seriously. “I need a lot of protein in all of my meals. Especially because I’m so short. It’s important for me to build muscle, don’t you agree? How else will I manage to compete with the taller, better-looking players?”
“Steak it is,” you said with a faux smile. “As for me, I’ll just get crackers.”
“Crackers? What kind of lunch is that?” he said.
“An affordable one,” you muttered under your breath.
“What?” he said.
“Nothing!” you said. “It’s nothing. I just really like crackers.”
He gave you an odd look. “Alright.”
You waved the waiter over. He had been hovering around your table for the past few minutes, and as soon as he saw you beckoning him, he sprinted to your side, fumbling with his pen and notepad before reaching you and bowing.
“Sae Itoshi, sir! I’m sorry to interrupt your date, but I just wanted to say that I’m a huge fan of yours. If — if it’s not too much trouble, could I have your autograph?” he said.
Sae sighed, a long-suffering and irritable sigh. “Just take our order first. I’ll give it to you after we’ve eaten.”
“Oh, my apologies,” the waiter said. “What would you like?”
“I’ll have the steak, and I also want this sandwich, but omit the tomatoes, please,” he said, pointing at the menu items he wanted.
“Got it,” the waiter said. “What about you, miss?”
“Just the crackers,” you said. The waiter paused, but when you did not say anything more, he giggled nervously.
“Would you, uh, like some cheese with those?” he said.
“Nope,” you said. “I’m really the biggest fan of plain crackers. That’s all I want.”
“Sure, miss, if that’s what you’d like,” he said. “So, one steak, one sandwich, and a plate of crackers?”
“That’s right,” Sae said, hardly looking up from his phone when he did so. It was only once the waiter had run off to place your orders that he put the device away, resting his elbows against the table, setting his chin in his hands and giving you a bored look. “Why are you glaring at me?”
“Steak and a sandwich, really?” you said.
“A conversation with you was more than enough to increase my appetite,” he said. “Forget about that. This is the part where you ask me questions about myself and I pretend like I am interested enough to answer them.”
“Why would I do that?” you said, rolling your eyes at him. “Actually, I’m pretty sure your answer to that question will be something that makes me even more annoyed than I already am, so don’t bother. What’s your favorite movie?”
“You’re not going to ask me about soccer?” he said. “It’s Taxi Driver, by the way.”
“I don’t know that much about soccer, so what would I even ask? Based on what I’ve seen from the matches my brother and dad watch, it’s just a bunch of sweaty guys kicking around a ball and pretending like they’re dying whenever another player happens to look at them the wrong way,” you said. “Oh, actually, I am curious about that. How many of those injuries are real? Have you ever faked getting hurt?”
“Almost none of them,” he said. “Generally, players will overreact for the sake of entertainment and the possibility of the opposition receiving yellow cards. I’ve never needed to do anything like that, and I never want to, because it looks stupid. Also, soccer is more than that mediocre description you just gave me.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say,” you said. “Man kick ball. Ball go in net. Man happy. That’s the extent of it.”
“Women play soccer, too,” he said.
“It’s the same concept there, but with women instead of men. Not the argument you thought it was,” you said.
“I can’t believe you actually dislike soccer,” he said.
There was definitely some irony in the fact that you couldn’t care less about his chosen sport, and yet you were the one who had somehow finagled your way into eating with him — even if you were the one who was paying. There were so many people who’d do anything to be in your place, but to you, it was a begrudging chore that you were only performing because you felt obligated to. Mentally, you had already marked the entire encounter down as something that you’d laugh about to your friends later; a fun story you’d tell at parties, but little else.
“Like I told you earlier, I’m the older sister. If I didn’t rag on my brother’s interests, then I couldn’t claim that title in any way that mattered,” you said. Sae’s eyes flicked down to the ground.
“You should be nice to your brother when you can,” he said.
“Are you some kind of an only child or saint, then? There’s no way you’re saying that if you have a normal relationship with any possible siblings,” you said.
“I have a little brother,” he said. “Our relationship is okay. I haven’t seen him in a while, though.”
“Long distance?” you said, reaching over to pat him on the hand sympathetically. “That’s the worst. I miss my friends and my pets already, and I’m only here for vacation.”
He snatched his hand away. “You make it sound like we’re dating or something. It’s alright. I’m sure it’ll be the same as it was whenever I go back.”
“True, it’s not like he can dump you and find a new brother who’s both better and more conveniently located than you are. He’s kind of stuck with you forever,” you said.
“Enough about my brother,” he said. “Let’s talk about something else.”
“Okay,” you said. “What TV shows do you watch when you’re bored?”
The two of you continued on in that mindless manner until your food arrived. Your mood, which had steadily been rising as Sae proved himself to be, if nothing else, a willing conversationalist, rapidly plummeted as the waiter set the steak and sandwich in front of Sae and the crackers in front of you.
“Enjoy your meal,” the waiter said.
“I’m sure one of us will,” you said, picking up a cracker and biting into it rebelliously. Sae began to cut his steak into small pieces, using his fork to demurely place the meat on his tongue, doing nothing to disguise the indulgence of eating such a wonderfully prepared meal while you were stuck with crackers.
“What a shame,” Sae said when he was about halfway through his steak. You hadn’t spoken since the food had come, mostly because you were too busy fervently hoping that he would choke and you would somehow be awarded a free meal as an apology on the restaurant’s part, so you jumped at the sound of his voice cutting through the silence. “My eyes were bigger than my stomach. I don’t think I’ll be able to eat that sandwich after all.”
“We should send it back, then,” you said.
“What sort of place do you think this is?” he said. “It’s already been ordered, so it’s ours now.”
“Are you serious?” you said. “What now? I’ll have to pay for something that you didn’t even eat!”
“You’ll just have to have it,” he said.
“Me?” you said, already salivating at the delectable sandwich, the bread which was taunting you. Come, it seemed to be calling out to you. Eat me. You know you want to. “I guess that’s a sensible prospect. Someone’s going to have to take it.”
“Someone will,” he agreed, sliding the plate across the table and stealing a cracker for his troubles. “It might as well be you. My coach will be pretty upset if I get stomach cramps next season because I overate too much on my off time. I’d have to tell him that it was your fault, and then you’d have all of Re Al after you, and you don’t want that. They’re relentless.”
Your fingers inched towards the sandwich. “I definitely don’t. That sounds scary.”
“It would be amusing,” he said. “A waste of resources, though. They might cut my salary to make up for it. ”
“Then the only solution is for me to eat this sandwich,” you said.
“Essentially,” he said. You gave in, taking an enormous bite of the tantalizing sandwich and exhaling in delight. It really was as good as the exorbitant price tag claimed it would be, and although you would never buy such a thing for yourself, you found that you were a little more grateful for the series of events that had led you to be in this position now that your stomach was finally being greeted with something substantial.
“It’s good,” you said, your words muffled by the napkin you held in front of your mouth as you finished chewing. “I can kind of get why they charge so much now. It’s still way more than any sandwich should ever cost, ever, but…I kinda get it. Is your food good, too?”
“It is,” he said.
“Alright!” you said, giving him a double thumbs up. “Then you can consider this a worthy apology! Let’s finish eating and be done with the entire mess.”
“Hm? But how can it be a worthy apology when I’m the one who paid for everything? To me, that doesn’t sound like an apology at all,” he said. You froze, your mouth wide open, the sandwich still halfway to your mouth and drooping in your hands. Sae looked at you, still expressionless, though if you really focused, you would’ve noticed something like mirth dancing in his irises.
“What do you mean?” you said. He unlocked his phone and showed you his screen.
“You can pay by app here,” he said. “I did it as soon as we were done ordering. I was going to tell you after you ordered what you wanted for yourself, but I wasn’t expecting you to be so frugal that you’d really only order crackers!”
“But — but I was supposed to pay! To apologize for—”
“You don’t have to say it,” Sae said sourly, cutting you off. “Believe me, I remember exactly what you have to apologize for, and I’m not going to forget. I just paid this time because I was feeling generous, but you still owe me.”
It was a little suspicious, but you didn’t have any reason to accuse him of anything, so you only narrowed your eyes at him. Taking another bite of your sandwich, you mulled over the latest reveal. He was paying for the entire lunch? You still owed him? You could manipulate that in your favor, then.
“Tomorrow morning, I’ll pay for your breakfast,” you said. “The hotel I’m staying at has complimentary breakfast for guests, but outsiders can eat for a certain fee. I’ll pay for your entrance, and then we can be even.”
“Sure,” he said. “I eat breakfast early, though.”
“How early?” you said.
“I have a snack at 7:00 a.m., before I go for my morning run, and then I eat a proper meal afterwards,” he said.
“Oh!” you said. “Any chance you could not do that?”
“It’s part of my training regimen,” he said. “How about you pay for my food and come on my run with me?”
“I hate running,” you said.
“You’re apologizing. It’s supposed to be an agonizing process,” he said. “You’ve called me short and ugly at least three separate times already, not to mention the entire slamming into me ordeal. It’s really the least you can do.”
“7:00 it is,” you said, though you were fighting back tears at the mere thought of getting up so early while on vacation. “Give me your phone.”
“No way,” he said, holding the phone away from you while you tried to swipe at it. “What are you going to do, post something embarrassing on my social media accounts?”
“Why would I do that?” you said. “I was going to text myself so I had your number and could send you my location for tomorrow.”
“Or you could tell me which hotel you’re staying at now, and then my phone is entirely removed from the equation,” he suggested.
“Do you think I remember the name?” you said. “That’s a rhetorical question, by the way. I don’t.”
He handed you his phone with an aggravated huff. “Fine. Don’t abuse the privilege. I only give important people my contact information.”
“Woah, you really are stingy,” you said, scrolling through his contacts list. All of them either had the designation of work attached to their profiles, or they were clearly members of Sae’s family.
Clicking on the plus sign in the corner, you created a new contact for yourself, typing in your number and giving yourself the name Y/N L/N — sandwich. It fit the naming conventions he had going on, and if it weren’t for the reminder that you were the so-called ‘sandwich girl’, you doubted he would remember who you were in the first place.
“Of course I am. Imagine I gave every crazy fan I met my number. I’d have a million stalkers before you could say Re Al,”he said.
“I’m not a crazy fan. To clarify, I’m not a fan in the first place,” you said, texting yourself from his number before taking out your own phone and responding to the message with a thumbs up.
“Correct, which is why you get my number,” he said.
“I feel so honored,” you said dryly. “Actually, you know what? I would feel honored, if it weren’t for the fact that you’re only giving it to me because you want to wake me up at an unholy hour and make me run with you before paying for your breakfast.”
“Would you rather pay for this meal?” he said, showing you the receipt he had been emailed. Your eyes widened, and then you shook your head rapidly.
“Nope! See you tomorrow!”
The next morning, you tiptoed around the hotel room as you got ready, trying your best not to wake your mother up. She, and the rest of your family, had been up late last night, going out for dinner and dessert well past your bedtime. Far too embarrassed to tell them the realreason you were going to sleep early, you had said you were sick and went to bed as soon as the sun set.
Angrily gnawing on a granola bar from your mother’s emergency stash, you stomped down the spiraling hotel staircase, your eyes still bleary as you texted your family group chat that you were going out for a morning walk but would be back for breakfast.
Sae Itoshi was waiting for you in the lobby, doing some weird stretching routine that involved pressing his foot against the wall and leaning over it. You watched him, bemused, wondering which muscles he was trying to stretch before giving up and deciding it was probably one of those pro moves that you were too uninterested and unathletic for.
“Oh, you’re here,” he said. “Good morning.”
“Good morning,” you said, giving him another one of the granola bars you had taken from your mother’s backpack. “Sorry, it’s sort of smushed. It’s been in a backpack for the last few days.”
He pinched the wrapper between his forefinger and thumb, looking at the granola bar with a disgusted expression. You didn’t think it was thategregious, but according to Sae, it must have been all but an offense against humanity, as he tossed it into the trash can within seconds of having it within his grasp.
“I already ate my snack,” he said.
“Why did you throw that away? I could’ve eaten it!” you said.
“That thing had probably melted and reformed at least twice. It was most definitely radioactive. I did you a favor, so you should say thank you,” he said.
“Thank you, Mr. Itoshi, for protecting me from the horrors of a slightly misshapen granola bar. I’m sure that, by throwing away that still edible brick of deliciousness, you have done me a great service. Possibly, you have even saved my life. I am eternally grateful,” you said.
He snorted. “You’re terrible at groveling. No wonder you have to do all of this ridiculous stuff to apologize to me instead of just saying sorry and moving on like a normal person.”
“Look, it’s a product of my upbringing,” you said. He finished stretching and headed out of the door; you followed after him with a smile at the hotel concierge, who seemed surprised to watch you go — whether it was the hour or your company, you weren’t sure. “Whenever my parents did something to upset me, they never apologized. They just came to my room with a bowl of fruit they had cut for me.”
“At least you got fruit,” he said. “My parents just told me to go practice soccer until I had cooled off.”
“Wow, really? That’s hardcore,” you said. Sae began to jog, and you did the same, though it was closer to a run for you than anything. “Did you just kick around the ball until you were less mad?”
“Pretty much,” he said.
“How horrible,” you said.
“Eh, it’s fine. It was a good way to get my anger out, and it had the added benefit of making me better at the sport, so it was pretty constructive overall,” he said.
“I still can’t imagine it,” you said, shaking your head. “What’s it like, being a professional athlete? Your entire life revolves around a game. What about when you can’t play anymore? When you’re too old, or if you get injured?”
His upper lip curled. “Do you want that to happen or something? Why are you speaking it into existence?”
“Not the injury part, but everyone grows old. You can’t stop that,” you said.
“I’ll play for as long as I can, and then I’ll coach for longer,” he said. “After that, I’ll retire and make sure my kids follow in my footsteps. Athletes make a lot of money, so I luckily won’t ever have to worry much about my finances.”
“What if your kids don’t want to play soccer?” you said. He actually sneered this time, the expression at home on his cold face.
“What else would they do with themselves? If they don’t want to play soccer, or if they have no talent at it, then they’re definitely not my children in the first place,” he said.
“Hm, maybe cooking? What if they want to be a chef?” you said.
“Then I’d wonder how your kids snuck into my house,” he said. You gasped, though it was as much for breath as it was out of offense.
“Stop it! You just happened to catch me at a hungry time!” you said.
“Sure,” he said.
“Just entertain the hypothetical that you really did somehow father children that were into cooking instead of soccer. How would you react?” you said.
“I would put them up for adoption,” he said.
“Seriously?” you said.
“No, obviously not,” he said. “What kind of person do you think I am? Why did you actually find that to be within the realm of possibility?”
“I think you’re some kind of soccer fiend. Who knows how dedicated you are to the cause?” you said.
“Not that dedicated,” he said. “I’d be disappointed if my kids can’t play soccer, and our relationship would probably be a bit distant, as I don’t know much about anything else, but I wouldn’t disown them.”
“You don’t know much about anything besides soccer? That’s a little sad,” you said.
“Kind of,” he said.
“Do you wish you knew about other things?” you said.
“Everyone has something they specialize in. It’s not uncommon for someone to know a lot about one thing and only a little about others,” he said. “My ‘thing’ is soccer. If it wasn’t that, then it’d be something else, so if I was in the business of wishing, I’d always be unsatisfied.”
You were already panting for breath when Sae picked up the pace, though he had not so much as broken a sweat yet. He glanced at you out of the corner of his eye, taking in your obvious struggles, and then he made the decision to not slow down at all.
“I get it,” you said. “You’ll face no judgment from me.”
“Like I would care if you did judge me,” he said. “You’re already dying, and we haven’t even started running yet.”
“This isn’t running?” you said. “What the hell? How much faster can you even go?”
“If you think that this is anywhere near the pace of an average soccer match, then I don’t even know where to begin with you,” he said.
“You look slower on TV!”
“What, so you think I’m slow, too?”
You and Sae returned to the hotel in markedly different conditions. He wasn’t even warm, still appearing to be perfectly put together and entirely perspiration-free, smelling faintly like body soap and cologne. On the other hand, you were still trying to regain your wits about you, leaning on his shoulder so that you did not fall over from exhaustion.
“This is embarrassing for you,” he informed you as you walked towards the breakfast area.
“You’re a professional athlete and I’m a normal girl! It would be embarrassing for you if I could keep up!” you argued weakly.
“That would be true, if I wasn’t going easy on you,” he said, pulling out a chair for you and helping you into it, brushing his arm off when he was sure you were seated. “I’m going to go to the bathroom. Be right back.”
“Have fun,” you said, resting your head in your hands, already knowing what you wanted to get. “We can walk through the buffet together. I’ll take the time to recover.”
“You do that,” he said.
While he was gone, you opened your phone, catching up on all of the texts in the family group chat that you hadn’t been able to read while you were attempting to run with Sae.
me: going for a morning walk but i’ll be back for breakfast
me: just wanted to let you all know so you weren’t worried!
uglier sibling: yeah nobody was worried LMFAO
mom: Hope you’re feeling better, honey!
dad: Make sure you’re back before 10. That’s when the complimentary breakfast ends, and we’re not paying for overpriced toast with jam.
uglier sibling: i still can’t believe u went for a morning walk
uglier sibling: like
uglier sibling: since when do u voluntarily wake up in the mornings at all let alone leave ur bed LET ALONE TAKE A WALK
uglier sibling: bitches will meet sae itoshi one time and suddenly they’re fitness influencers or wtvr
uglier sibling: btw i’m still mad that u didn’t get his autograph or a photo with him or anything
uglier sibling: i bet u made it up
uglier sibling: LIAR. FRAUD. HACK.
mom: Honey, leave your sister alone. Why would she make something like that up? 
dad: Your mother is right. Y/N doesn’t even know who Sae Itoshi is.
So it was a typical conversation, then. You hadn’t missed much; just your brother being salty and your parents showing some care for your well-being, as well as your father worrying for his wallet like he was prone to do. You didn’t even bother responding, just liking your father’s two messages and then putting your phone away.
“Y/N, you’re back already? What good timing!” your father called out to you from the entrance to the hotel restaurant. The world slowed as you turned to see the rest of your family walking into the restaurant, dressed in their typical touristy outfits. Your mother waved at you, and your brother faked gagging.
“Wow, you look like shit,” he said. “The fuck kinda morning walk were you on?”
“Gross, it’s you,” you said. “Go away! I’m busy.”
“You don’t even have any food with you,” he pointed out. “Can I sit with you? The parents are way too chipper in the mornings.”
“No!” you said.
“But there’s an empty seat at your table. Are you saving it for someone?” he said.
“Yes,” you said, wishing that for once they would’ve all slept in instead of getting here at the exact time that you and Sae had.
“No, you’re not,” he said.
“Come on, you two, let’s sit together and have a family breakfast!” your father said, motioning you and your brother over from where he and your mother had settled at a four-person table. Your brother gave you a pleading look.
“I’ll owe you forever,” he said. “I’ll grind on all of your video games for you the entire plane ride home!”
“I’m not lying, dude, I actually am sitting with someone. Now fuck off and leave me alone!” you hissed.
“Who?” he said, crossing his arms. “Your imaginary friend? Or your imaginary boyfriend!”
“Excuse me? Sorry, I was sitting there. Do you mind—?”
The most comical expression you had ever seen flashed over your brother’s face just then. It was horror mixed with incredulity mixed with extreme confusion. He turned slowly, his jaw dropping as he made eye contact with Sae Itoshi, whose dry countenance and perfect posture were as off-putting as ever.
“What?” your brother said. “What is going on?”
Sae sat opposite you. “This hotel has the most confusing first floor layout I’ve ever encountered. It took me ages just to find the bathroom.”
“There’s signs. Can you not read?” you said. He stared at you dully.
“I can read. I just happened not to look up at them,” he said.
“If I didn’t want to pay for even more food, I’d make another short joke, but I shall refrain,” you said.
“That was cutting it close,” he said.
“Y/N. My beautiful, amazing, wonderful older sister,” your brother said.
“Yes?” you said, preparing yourself for the incoming explosion. “Also, that’s not what you were calling me in the group chat earlier, was it?”
“Is that Sae Itoshi?” he said.
“Liar, fraud, hack, was that what it was?” you said. “Run along, loser. Maybe if you were nicer to me, I’d let you sit with us.”
Your brother opened his mouth to argue, but then, like he had remembered he was standing in front of his idol, he hung his head and trudged off, scuffing his toes against the floor as he did and giving you a betrayed look over his shoulder.
“That’s your little brother?” Sae said.
“Yup,” you said. “Your self-proclaimed biggest fan.”
“And you made him go sit with your parents instead of talking to me? You’re super mean, big sister,” Sae said.
“He wouldn’t shut up if I let him stay here, and considering the goal of this is for you to eat and then leave me alone for the rest of my vacation, that would not be conducive,” you said.
“I see,” he said. “I didn’t realize that was the goal.”
“Isn’t it yours, as well? I’m sure you’d like to enjoy yourself on your time off from soccer,” you said.
“Who says I’m not enjoying myself?” he said. You furrowed your brow at him.
“You’ve had the same expression on your face every time we’ve spoken,” you pointed out, lowering your eyelids and pursing your lips in an imitation of his resting mien. “Like this. It’s totally amphibious.”
“Amphibious?” he repeated. “What does that even mean?”
“You don’t know what amphibious means? Man, when you said you only focused on soccer, I didn’t think it was this bad!” you said.
“I know what amphibious means! I just don’t see how the word applies,” he said.
“Oh, right. Well, you kind of look like the frog emoji,” you said. “Sorry, I could’ve been clearer. That’s my bad.”
“Were you dropped on the head as a baby? I’m asking this from a place of concern, not anger,” Sae said. “It’s because you say so many nonsensical things. After all, I look nothing like the frog emoji.”
“Sure, and people tell me I look like a famous actress,” you said.
“Really?” he said.
“No, I thought we were both saying things that aren’t true,” you said.
“I think you look like a famous actress,” he said. “There. Now we’re both saying things that are true.”
“Well done, Mr. Itoshi! That was clever,” you said, knowing when to concede.
“Thank you,” he said. “Let’s go get our food now. If you die of starvation on my watch, it’ll be a major scandal for Re Al.”
“Your manager must love you,” you said. “So conscientious of your public image.”
“Nope, he’s usually pretty pissed at me,” he said as the two of you got in the buffet line.
“What for?” you said.
“Contrary to what you think, I’m pretty unconcerned with my public image. I’m a soccer player, not some kind of philanthropist or actor or whatever,” he said. “What does it matter if I offend people? My value is in playing well, not being friendly or kind.”
“No one ever accused you of being either of those two,” you said, spreading butter and jam over your toast. “You’re not that bad, though.”
“You’re not that bad, either,” he said. “At least, you’re better company than my manager.”
“I’ll take it as a compliment,” you said. He scoffed.
“You have low standards,” he said.
“Yours are lower,” you said.
“Very mature response.”
“Thanks!”
Sae was a pretty agreeable breakfast partner. He wasn’t as impossibly cheerful as your parents, who generally drove you crazy with their talkativeness so early in the day, but he also wasn’t as silent and closed off as your brother, who was prone to snapping at others until he had finished at least half of his meal. As with lunch yesterday, it was almost an enjoyable experience, right up until you remembered whose card he was eating on.
“Where are you going?” he said when your plates had been cleared and you had pushed yourself to your feet. He followed after you as you made your way to the hostess’s station, ignoring the whispers that echoed behind the two of you.
“To pay for you to be here, duh,” you said, fishing around in your purse for your wallet. “I know you’re famous and all, but that doesn’t mean you get to eat for free. In fact, that was kind of the point of the meal.”
“I already paid for myself, so you can go and sit back down with your family if you’d like,” he said.
“What? When?” you said.
“I wouldn’t spend that long in a bathroom,” he said. “Not a public one.”
“You little—! Now what?” you said.
“Now you have to see me tomorrow,” he said. “Bye. I’ll pick you up for dinner, so make sure to wear something nice, and bring your credit card. It’s your treat.”
He walked off with a jaunty wave, leaving you standing there, confounded by the development. He had paid for himself again? What was the point of making you take him places if he was just going to cough up the cash himself anyways?
“Psst. Y/N,” your brother said. You weren’t sure when or where he had appeared, but it remained that he was suddenly tapping you on the shoulder and whispering in your ear. “Does Sae Itoshi have a crush on you? If so, please ask if he can get tickets for dad and I to attend his next game.”
“What?” you said, a shockwave running through your entire body at the mere thought of Sae having a crush on you. It was so juvenile and cliched as to be out of Sae’s character entirely. “No! I just owe him.”
“For what?” your brother said.
“I ran into him, called him ugly, and said that he was short,” you said. “Indirectly, of course, but it still happened. I was supposed to buy him lunch yesterday as an apology, but then he ended up paying for us both, and then today, I went on a run with him, and I was going to pay for him to have breakfast here, but guess what?”
“He paid for himself?” your brother said.
“He paid for — yeah, how did you know?” you said.
“There weren’t that many ways the story could’ve gone. Also, I overheard you guys talking,” he said.
“Creep,” you said.
“Weirdo,” he said.
“Freak,” you said.
“Stupid,” he said. “I bet he has a crush on you.”
“Why would he? We have zero common interests, and I’ve mostly only insulted him in our very short time knowing one another,” you said.
“Maybe he’s into that. Some guys are. My one friend is — actually, I’m not exposing him like that,” he said.
“Thank you, because I really didn’t want to know,” you said.
“Anyways, where I was going with that is some guys like girls who humble them a bit. Especially someone like Sae Itoshi; he’s probably so used to people falling all over themselves to get his attention that it’s nice for him to hang out with someone who’s too oblivious to care about that kind of stuff,” he said.
“People like you?” you said. “I told him you were his biggest fan, just so you know.”
“Why would you do that?” your brother said, his eyes bugging out and his mouth forming a pained grimace. “He probably thinks I’m a nerd now!”
“You do it to yourself, buddy,” you said. “Let’s go. It looks like the parents want us to go sit with them. Think you can handle it?”
“After learning that my hero has a crush on my sister and, furthermore, probably thinks of me as some kind of dweeb, I can handle anything,” he said.
The entire day, you pondered your brother’s words. Did Sae have a crush on you? Running through his actions and every conversation you both had ever had led you to think that he did not. It didn’t seem like he liked you very much in even a platonic sense, so how could anyone begin to think he liked you romantically? It was just tolerance for the sake of his pride, that was all.
And you definitely didn’t like him. He was emotionless and conceited and teased you far too often. What did it matter that he was somewhat attractive? He had a terrible personality, and you bet that if more of his fans knew what he was like, he wouldn’t have any to begin with.
No wonder Sae’s manager hated him. He was probably a jerk to his poor employees, too.
“We’re thinking of going here for dinner tonight,” your father said the next day. “Look, their reviews are pretty high, and their prices aren’t crazy. What does everyone think?”
“I’m fine with anything,” your mother said.
“Same here,” your brother said.
“Y/N?” your father said. You were about to respond when your own phone buzzed. You knew exactly who it was texting you, and you sighed as you opened it.
sae itoshi (dumb haircut): I will be there in one hour.
sae itoshi (dumb haircut): You better not have forgotten about our plans for tonight.
sae itoshi (dumb haircut): I made a reservation, so I’ll really be mad if you stand me up.
sae itoshi (dumb haircut): Especially because you’re paying.
me: I WILL BE THERE OMFG STOP TEXTING ME
sae itoshi (dumb haircut): Okay.
“I can’t,” you said.
“Why not? Are you on some new diet or something? They should have vegetarian options, so that won’t be a problem,” your father said. “We can look at their menu beforehand if you prefer, and if you really don’t like anything, then we can find somewhere else.”
“I already have plans,” you said, your lower lip jutting out childishly. “Not that I want to! But I made a promise.”
“You already have plans? What’s that supposed to mean?” your mother said.
“I’m having dinner with someone,” you said.
“Ooh, how exciting! With who?” she said.
“I bet I can guess!” your brother sang.
“Enough out of you!” you said, kicking him in the back of the leg. He doubled over, though that did not stop him from smirking at you.
“Y/N and Sae, sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” he said.
“You’re going out with Sae Itoshi?” your father said. “You should’ve just said so! That’s perfectly alright, honey. Actually, he’s the one man I’m not upset about you dating!”
“We are not dating!” you said. “It’s a more transactional relationship than that. No feelings involved. It’s just me apologizing to him.”
“Are you close enough to him to get an autograph for your brother and I?” your dad said.
“Um.” You thought about it. Would Sae give you an autograph for them? You weren’t sure. There was a chance he would, but there was also a high chance he would not. “I dunno. I can ask.”
“You’ll ask for dad, but not for me? Wow, I see how it is,” your brother said.
“Yeah, because you’re annoying!” you said. “Ugh. I have to get ready now. He’ll be here to get me in an hour. Have fun at dinner, all of you. Keep me in your thoughts and prayers.”
“You have fun as well,” your mother said. “Make sure not to bring any money with you. Gentlemen should always pay on the first date.”
“I’ll be sure to tell him that,” you said, giving up on explaining things to your family for the sake of your sanity.
Sae was aggressively punctual. Exactly an hour after he had texted you, a shiny black car was pulling up in the valet lane, and a tall, bald man in a suit was opening the door for you. You climbed in awkwardly, finding Sae to be sitting on the other side, gazing out of the window pensively.
“Hello,” you said, smoothing your dress and buckling your seatbelt. “You have a driver?”
“Of course I do,” he said. “I usually walk places when I’m on vacation, but this restaurant is kind of far, so I thought it’d be more prudent to have the driver take us.”
“I see,” you said. “Thank you, driver, sir.”
The driver hummed in acknowledgement but did not say anything else. You supposed he probably wasn’t used to talking with his passengers; you doubted Sae ever spoke to him much.
“It’s been so hot out recently,” Sae said stiffly.
“That’s what happens during the summer, yes,” you said.
“That’s true,” he said.
“You’re right, though,” you said. “It has been hot.”
“Super hot,” he said.
“Yes,” you said. “Super hot.”
That must’ve been why there was a slight redness to his cheeks. There was definitely no other reason. And there wasn’t any other reason for why you felt uncomfortably warm, shifting in your seat to dissipate the feeling in your stomach. It was the temperature. That was all.
Given the trend, you really should have anticipated it when Sae paid for your dinner while you were freshening up in the bathroom, but you really had not seen it coming in the slightest. He scrunched up his face when you argued, simply telling you that he would see you tomorrow before dropping you back off at your hotel, the receipt in your hand, his flourishing signature scrawled across the back.
“For your brother,” he had said, handing it to you before you could even ask him for his autograph. “You said he was a fan, right? I’ll get him a better one later, but for now, this should do.”
You spent every day of the rest of that vacation with Sae Itoshi. Some days, you would accompany him on a morning walk — he had softened to slowing his pace, so that he was only barely jogging instead of the full on run that he had forced you into that first time — and on others, the two of you would have some meal or another together. The common theme was that, if there was money involved, he would take care of it. Without question, without hesitation, he always slapped your hand back and pulled out his own credit card, telling you that now you both had to meet again, and the next time you really would be the one paying, or else he’d never be able to forgive you for your terrible behavior.
Your parents and brother complained about it at first, as your new friendship with Sae — could it be considered a friendship, or was it something else? — meant you did not see them much on what was supposed to be a family vacation.
You brought it up with Sae, and he responded with something about how it wouldn’t have been a problem at all if you weren’t such a freeloader and actually paid for him, like you were supposed to. This resulted in a lighthearted squabble between you both, which in turn made you forget your family’s whining, and as well you should have. You could take a million more vacations with them, but you’d likely never get a chance to hang out with Sae Itoshi again, so why wouldn’t you take advantage of it when you could?
Sae didn’t forget, though. He sent you back from dinner the next evening with a soccer ball he had won in one of his games, his signature and a note of gratitude scribbled on it in black marker.
Thank you for letting me borrow your daughter and sister from you while you’re on your trip. I really appreciate it, even if she doesn’t know anything about soccer. — Sae Itoshi
They stopped complaining after that. The ball became your brother’s most prized possession, and every day, your father would tell you how happy he was that you had made such a considerate friend.
“And you know, if you ever want to date him,” he’d say, elbowing you in the side with an obnoxious wink. “We wouldn’t be opposed!”
Your mother was in the same boat. “He really cares about you, I think. Enough that he gave your family something so precious just because he thought we didn’t like him. You could do a lot worse than that.”
“Plus, he’s rich and famous!” your brother would chime in without fail. “Double win!”
“You guys are all nuts,” you’d tell them, shaking your head to disguise how pleased the thought of dating Sae made you.
It could never happen. Like your brother was so happy to remind you, he was rich and famous, an athlete that was adored worldwide and played for the best soccer club in history. He could have any girl he wanted, so why would he ever choose you? You and he were from two different planes of existence. Maybe you could pretend for a little bit that you weren’t, but the date for your eventual departure from Spain was drawing closer and closer, and that day meant the certain end of the fever dream that was your closeness with Sae.
You had been prepared from the start for it to finish in this way. You would go home and tell all of your friends about your trip, how you had spent almost every day with the famous soccer player Sae Itoshi, how he had given you his phone number and made you go on runs with him, how together, you and him had eaten lunch and dinner and breakfast and several meals that you were convinced he had just made up to have an excuse to buy food for the two of you — brunch, linner, midnight snacks and third desserts.
There were other things that you wouldn’t tell them, too, things that Sae had not necessarily said to you in confidence but which you sensed were held close to his heart and which you would therefore hold close to yours. His little brother was named Rin, and they had the same eyes, though Rin’s were quicker to water and perpetually had hair falling into them. He still watched the same shows he used to when he was very small, because they reminded him of his parents’ home. He thought that a person’s athletic potential could be determined by the shape of their butt, but he tended to avoid looking as a form of respect for others.
“That’s a pretty cool skill, Sae! What do you think my athletic potential is?” you had asked when he had revealed that last fact.
“If it’s possible for a person to have negative potential, then that’s about what yours is. If it’s not, then you’re definitely at a zero,” he had responded.
“You didn’t even look,” you had said, shoving a French fry into his mouth as punishment. He hated French fries for how unhealthy they were, and you had half-expected him to lecture you about fats and oils and salts, but instead, he had dutifully chewed and swallowed without any theatrics.
“Don’t need to, and don’t plan to,” he had said, and that was that. “I’ve already seen you run, and that told me all I needed to know about your athletic skills. Or, in this case, your lack thereof.”
If you took his words at face value, then you would’ve thought he truly hated you. He never missed a chance to make fun of you, and you were the same way — certainly, anyone who overheard your conversations would’ve been convinced that you and he were bitter enemies. But that was because they didn’t see the way he always positioned himself on the sidewalk so that he was between you and the oncoming traffic. They didn’t see the way he’d pull out your chair and only pretend to frown when you’d thank him for it. They didn’t see the way his ears would turn pink if you dared to smile in his direction or, heaven forbid, agreed with what he was saying instead of arguing, as was your go-to.
No, you were pretty confident that Sae Itoshi did not hate you. It was just that soccer was his thing and all other areas were beyond him, areas which included such fields as emotional awareness and sensitivity.
Maybe you might tell the friends you were particularly close to about that. Sae Itoshi treated me pretty well, you’d say, with grand, sweeping hand motions to emphasize the point. As well as he knew how to, which was well enough for me. If I ever get a boyfriend, they’ll have a lot to live up to. Seems kind of unfair to whatever poor schmuck gets stuck with the task, don’t you think? Considering the two of us never even dated…
“I'm going home tomorrow morning,” you said. The sun was setting, and the two of you were walking along the same stretch of beach that you had first met at. “I finished packing all of my things before dinner. It’s surreal, almost. I feel like an entirely different person now, compared to when I came here.”
“Is that so?” he said, the corners of his lips twitching slightly. “I wonder why.”
“Did you just smile?” you said. Immediately, he scowled.
“No way,” he said. “I’d never smile because of something you said.”
“Uh-huh, uh-huh, you definitely smiled. I made you smile! I made you smile! I made you smile!” you said, poking him in the cheek repeatedly. Sae’s expressions were so subtle that it was easy to overlook them before they had vanished, but there was no overlooking what you had just seen. He had definitely smiled at you, or at least he had been about to.
“Stop poking me,” he grumbled.
“No,” you said, poking him again. “Only if you smile again.”
“Hell no,” he said. You poked his cheek again. “Y/N. Stop it.”
“Will you miss me?” you said.
“Not if you don’t quit that!” he said, grabbing your wrist when you prepared to poke him again. Heat rose to your cheeks at the way his thumb rested against your pulse, and when he realized he was holding your hand so familiarly, his own cheeks flushed. “No. I won’t.”
“I’ll miss you,” you said, digging your feet into the sand, turning out to the sea because you couldn’t stand to look at him when you were being so vulnerable. “I’ll tell everyone I know about you, of course, but it won’t be the same. Something funny will happen, and I’ll think to myself, oh, Sae would’ve snorted at that — but not laughed, because you don’t laugh. Or I’ll order shitty French fries, and it’ll remind me of how much you’d scold me for eating them. You’d say something like, those are basically heart attacks in a box, and then you’d pour a bottle of salted kombucha down my throat to cleanse my system.”
Somewhere in the distance, a seagull squawked, reminding you of the fateful encounter from so long ago. You wished you could go back and get to know Sae all over again. You wished you could ask him the same questions and not know the answers, so that you were surprised when he told them to you. You wished you could argue with him for a little bit longer. You wished that, one more time, you could imply he was short and ugly and slow and a thousand other rude adjectives, even if he was really none of those things, none of them at all.
“I’m going to ask you one last question, okay?” you said. “Please think over your answer carefully. It’s important.”
“Okay,” he said, uncharacteristically gently. “I’ll really consider it well.”
“What’s your favorite animal?” you said.
“Seagulls,” he said immediately, directly contradicting his solemn oath. You laughed at this, burying your face in your hands to hide the hitch in your throat.
“You traitor,” you said. “You know all about the feud between seagulls and I, and yet you’re still claiming they’re your favorites?”
“They always have been,” he said. “I like migratory birds, how they don’t stay in one place but are always moving around. It must be such a blissful life.”
“But it’s probably pretty lonely, too,” you said. “They don’t have anywhere to call home.”
“I like lonely things,” he said. “That’s why the end of the summer is my favorite season.”
“Hm,” you said. “Then, if I tell you that I’ll be lonely once I leave here, will you like me, too?”
He looked at you, but you stared resolutely ahead, your gaze trained on the horizon, the way his had been on the day you had run into him. It was such a kiddish question, and internally, you were beating yourself up for asking it, but deep down, you wanted to know, so you did not move to retract it.
“Well, I like seagulls for a different reason now,” he said.
So that was your answer, then. The waves crashed against the shore, and a balmy wind blew through your hair and clothes, carrying the light scent of Sae’s cologne to your nose, the same one he had worn for as long as you could remember.
“I understand,” you said.
“These days, it’s a specific seagull I’m fond of, actually,” he said.
“Huh? Like a breed or something?” you said.
“No, just one bird in particular,” he said. “It did me a really huge favor recently.”
“What are you talking about? You always say that you suspect I was dropped on the head as a baby, but between the two of us, I think the one that was dropped was you,” you said, the fraying ends of your rejected feelings driving you to irascibility.
“A while ago, I was standing on the beach, feeling pretty annoyed with the world — as usual,” he said. “I had had to run from the paparazzi in order to go on this vacation without being bothered, you know, and I honestly was starting to question if I’d ever be seen as a normal person. I get that the only thing I’m good at is soccer, but it’s pretty tiring to be thought of as a guy who kicks balls around and nothing more.”
Unbidden, you inhaled sharply, because the story was starting to sound familiar. Spinning on your heel, you were met with the sight of Sae smiling shyly, peering down at you through his unfairly long eyelashes.
“That seagull must’ve known how I was feeling. There’s no other explanation for it all. It must’ve known how I was feeling, and somehow, it managed to find the one person in the entire world that saw me as something other than that. Do you know what it did next? It stole that person’s sandwich, and it led her right to me,” he said.
“Are you talking about me?” you said.
“How many people do you think have called me a short, ugly, D-list celebrity instead of asking for my autograph upon meeting me?” he said.
“Probably not very many,” you said. He chuckled.
“Probably not any,” he said. You rested your forehead against his shoulder.
“Probably not,” you said. He stroked your hair, though his motions were like a marionette’s — he was not very used to this type of relationship, after all. But he was trying his best, and you found that to be far more endearing than any suave gestures might’ve been.
“I know you have to go soon, so I was planning on not saying anything,” he said. “What would be the point? I figured this was just a summer fling for you. But then you had to go and be all sentimental, and I had to say something.”
“I’m glad you did,” you said. “It would’ve been worse if I had returned home without knowing at all. Where do we go from here, though?”
“Where do we go from here? Let me think. Well, I’ll ask you to be my girlfriend,” he said. “And you’ll say yes, because who would ever reject me? Then we’ll talk on the phone every day, and you can send me photos of things you find funny, and I’ll have a sixth sense for when you’re eating French fries and I’ll send you strongly worded texts in reprimand. You’ll fly over to watch my matches whenever possible, and when I’m on my next break, I’ll come visit you and meet your family and friends properly.”
“Getting a little presumptuous, aren’t we? What if I say no?” you said.
“Will you?” he said.
“Not sure. How about you ask and find out?” you said.
“If you’re going to say no, then I don’t want to,” he said. You stuck your tongue out at him.
“I can’t be with a man who’s afraid of rejection. It was nice knowing you, Sae,” you said. “See you around. Hope you lose the Champions League.”
“Wait! I’m not afraid of rejection,” he said. “Y/N, will you be my girlfriend? Officially, I mean.”
“Yes, of course,” you said. “But you’re going to have to buy my plane tickets if you want me to watch you. Even with frequent flier miles, I doubt I can afford coming to see you that often.”
“Consider it done,” he said. You grinned at him.
“You know, if you’re my boyfriend, then you’re going to have to keep paying for our dates, as well. My mother said that’s the gentlemanly thing for you to do,” you said.
“Right, I was expecting that,” he said. “Don’t you think there’s a reason why I haven’t let you buy anything yet?”
“Then how am I ever supposed to apologize to you for the circumstances of our first meeting? I mean, I was pretty harsh,” you said.
“That’s true,” he said. “Let me think.”
“Mhm,” you said. “I know that that’s out of your comfort zone, so I’ll give you a minute.”
“I have an idea,” he said, though it was accompanied by a slight glare at your jab.
“What is it?” you said.
“Close your eyes,” he said. You obliged, squeezing them shut, though not without widening your feet into the defensive stance he had demonstrated to you on the day he had attempted to teach you basic soccer skills.
“What are you going to do, tackle me or something? I’m using the position you taught me, but please be gentle, you’re way more muscular than—!”
You were cut off by him pressing his lips to yours. It was a soft kiss, gentle and light, like feathers in the air or water against the sand, and he pulled away before you could really react or reciprocate. He had left you wanting, and you knew he knew that, because there was a smugness to his voice when he spoke next.
“Apology accepted,” he said as you blinked at him in shock, your mind still lagging well behind your body. “Now we’re even.”
“Hold on,” you said. “I’m suddenly feeling very repentant and remorseful. Are you quite sure you forgive me with just that?”
He laughed. It was such a lovely sound, his laugh, and you would’ve told him so if you weren’t afraid that he’d stop when you pointed it out.
“Maybe not,” he said. “You might have to apologize a bit more.”
“That sounds doable,” you said. “Yeah, I might be able to work that in. It’ll be agonizing, but a wise man once told me that that’s just the nature of apologizing, so it’s the least I can do, right?”
“Oh, shut up,” he said, holding your face in his hands and leaning in. You did the same, your eyes closing all on their own as you sought out the connection he had deprived you of earlier.
As the sun set over the horizon and the seagulls settled in for the night, he kissed you again.
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alphajocklover · 3 days
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I've grown....tired of my life. Like, it's the same pointless thing day after day. Caring so much about making the world better. I work a sad little non profit. Living in the big city and making little money. I haven't been on a date with a gay in over a year. Straight guys have it so much easier. Sometimes I wish I was more like them...dumb... obnoxious and loud...always having some crude joke....hehe....that'd be fun...to be some loudmouth hot as hell straight comedian or some famous straight actor who could get away with whatever he wanted because he was dumb, hot and young. Like maybe a lean muscular dude or a big bodybuilding buff guy. It wouldn't matter just as long as you make me some obnoxious hot straight asshole.
You say you’re tired of your life… but I don’t think tired is the right word. The word tired suggests you‘ve used up all your energy, that you’ve reached the end of your endurance and need to stop. That’s not what’s happening here. You aren’t tired, you’re restless. It’s not that you’ve used up all your energy, it’s that you haven’t used any of it. You’ve been standing still, living the same life the same way for too long now, and now all that energy you were supposed to be using to be a real man has built up so much you’re about to burst, and as silly as it sounds I’m not speaking in metaphors. Masculinity has its own, literal, actual energy.
Not much is known about it. It’s been called a number of things throughout the years, one of the best known and crudest nicknames being ‘Big Dick Energy’. But what we do know is that it’s real, and you’ve built up quite a lot of it. That happens sometimes, when someone generates said energy but doesn’t actually use it by doing anything manly. See, every guy generates some, jocks generate a lot, sissys generate a little, and most people use just as much as they generate. But not you. You haven’t been using any of your energy, so it’s built up inside you and now… it’s going to burst out. From what you’ve told me it seems like you’re already experiencing the first symptoms. An urge to act manly, toxic and obnoxious. But that’s just the beginning. Soon the buildup will become too much, and it’ll take over.
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The transformation will be almost instant. You’ll beef up, dumb down, and lose yourself in pure, toxic masculinity. It’ll come off of you in waves, and you’ll feel like it’s the greatest high of your life. But like every high it won’t last forever. Eventually, probably after a few weeks of fucking sluts and beating up nerds, you’ll run out of energy and go back to you’re regular self, probably confused and strangely horny. That doesn’t mean you’ll never see your straight douchebag self again. Once you’re overloaded by masculine energy once, it’s easier for it to happen again. Not only that, the next time it happens it’ll happen longer.
You could try to keep it from happening again. Do something manly regularly, something simple like watching sports or working out. Or you could let it happen again. Keep turning into a straight jock for longer and longer, until eventually you completely overload on it and end up like that permanently. Whatever choice you make, I’m sure you won’t be tired of your life anymore.
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russellsppttemplates · 24 hours
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Wuuuuuuuu , halloooo ❤️❤️❤️finally able to catch blurb night , how are you? I hope you are fine , i just watch logan radio after the crash and another video of him literally wiping tears through the helmet whilst inside the car and it broke my hearts 😭😭😭, if you don't mind is a ok a story of reader comforting him and give a bigggg hug , him try to be strong and like but then he can't hold it anymore and just cry , and reader just hold him ?
Note: I hope you're well too! I know this is showing very late, but hopefully, it's still enjoyable!
Through no fault of his own, Logan's home race was cut short, and the sadness and disappointment were clear on his face.
Once your boyfriend got back to the garage and spoke to the mechanics and the rest of the team, your arms were the first things he looked for, heading your way and pulling you with him so you could have some privacy.
"It's me, Logan", you cupped the nape of his neck as you held his head to your neck, kissing his cheek multiple times, "you don't have anything to prove to me, or anyone else for that matter, but especially to me, my love", you cooed.
"This sucks so so much! It wasn't even my fault!", he groaned, letting the tears or frustration join his display of emotions.
"Let it all out, love, I'm here, I've got you", yoi rubbed his back soothingly, "do you want to go out there or to your room? I'm fine either way".
"My room, please", he mumbled, taking your hand and removing himself from your hold briefly so you could walk there.
Laying down on the small sofa, you pulled him back into your arms, not caring about his race suit being in the way, "I love you Logan, no matter what".
(Thank you for sending this in ✨️)
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wonton4rang · 1 day
Text
pairing: bnd legal line x reader.
warnings: smut, 18+
mtl (most to least) in bnd to be sub/ dom. this will have two perspectives, daily life and intimacy.
sungho;
intimacy: he will definitely be a service dom, i don't make the rules!! he would treat you like a princess, with so much love and affection that you even get worried that if you ever break up you are going to be so empty and sad :( he would fuck you slowly yet deep, whispering love words in your ear before biting on it softly, everything being so personal and romantic that you would just feel that warm fuzzy feeling that would bring your orgasm after he tells you how good you are for him and his thrusts get sloppy before he comes crashing down.
daily life: idek how to put it but he'll be a mature simp??? like you are the only one in his eyes, he would blush and giggle whenever you said something to him or touched his hands with so much adoration, but he would also be very mature and you both will have your own space and serious conversations going on. so he's kinda of a sub.
jaehyun;
intimacy: a sub 99.99% of the times, he's so soft and subby that's actually crazy, he would love you to handle him and tell him how good he is. but beware of that 00.01% because the day he comes with the switch on and his dom side comes forward?? you are fucked up (quite literally) because he's unstoppable and his energy would show up while he fucks the shit out of you.
daily life: honestly i see him as a dom in the daily life, he would want to take care of things for you, guide you and teach you stuff, hold your hand and kiss it better when you are feeling nervous. he is such a good boyfriend for you.
riwoo;
intimacy: definitely a soft dom, the only reason he's a "dom" is because he's the one fucking you and sometimes he actually takes the lead. sex with riwoo will mostly be you riding him while you guys kissed or him fucking you from behind while you spooned, but he will always be so caring a lovely, only caring about how you're feeling even when he's getting lost himself and finishes abruptly.
daily life: he's just a submissive person overall, he would just nod and say yes to anything you propose, he won't go against you unless is a joke and honestly you guys have similar tastes so he doesn't really has a reason to be anything else but a subby pretty boyfie <3
taesan:
intimacy: i think it depends. taesan seems to me like a very romantic person, really into a serious relationship kinda boy, so i believe he would be a dom when needy and a soft dom when you need it. he would look over for you but also take care of himself sometimes, always reassuring you of how much he loved you.
daily life: a SUB. i'm so sorry but he is such a submissive boyfriend fr fr, he would hold your hand and only look at you, his straight face making him look like the bitchiest mf but shattering when you said something and he just sweetly laughed. i know he's a boy that loves to joke around and he will!! but his eyes will look for yours with everything he says, waiting for your reaction with anticipation and nerves eating him alive.
leehan:
intimacy: a dom 99% of the time. he would grab your hair, choke you, fuck you so hard you gotta cover your mouth to not alert the neighbours, he would mess you up a thousand times and still comeback for more. but that 1% is just him being a softie for you, just smiling and letting you do whatever you want with him, he wouldn't mind you doing whatever the fuck you wanted. he just loves you so much.
daily life: it's 50,50 for me, he would like to have control over some things but i also think he would pass the responsibilities over to you most of the time, just agreeing with anything that you decide.
so overall here's my MTL rank:
DOM.
leehan.
taesan.
sungho.
riwoo.
jaehyun.
SUB.
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bunnypeew · 2 days
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Do you write nsfw alphabets?? if yes then valentino alphabet valentino alphabet valentino alphabet valentino alphabet val 🌀🌀🌀🌀🌀👄👁️ (i'm mentally ill)
Valentino NSFW alphabet
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
self explantory MDI THANK YOU
YAHHH I CAN DO THAT NEVER DONE IT BEFORE SO BARE WITH ME AHAHA, I picture him as a switch btw :3c
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
He would defintly prepare a bubble bath for you after it since he's pretty rough with it and wants to make sure you are in perfect shape for him
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
his favorite body parts of his are obviously his wings! cuz even tho they are very big they are still pretty sensitive, while on you it would be the breats/chest part, he loves to touch there since its almost always the most sensitive part of someones body
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
he's not scared of cumming inside, also loving it doesn't help that you are most probably getting cream pied every single time :)
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
he doesnt really have a dirty secret, everyone knows he's into anything so
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
hes the Overlord of p0rn for fuck sake, he knows what he's doing for sure, since he had a lot time to practice too
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
mating press. MATING PRESS. even tho he knows he cant get you pregnant he wants you to take every single drop of his cum
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Hes not a really humorous person in general but he does like to make you laugh sometimes during the deed, just to make sure you are enjoying yourself too
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
I like to believe he completly clean shaven, he's doesn't like hair and messy so he cuts it completely
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
again he doesnt seem like the romantic type, but with you its a completely different thing, he loves you a lot even tho he's doesn't like to show it, sometimes he just cant help but be kind of lovey dovey during sex
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
he likes to do it a lot, especially when you arent around, he used to have a lot of fwb before he met you, but now he restrains from fucking anyone else lol
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
OH LORD DOES HE HAVE KINKS,,, he has way to many to list I'm gonna be honest, he likes and accepts everything
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
everywhere. LITERALLY everywhere. he doesnt care if he gets caught, if he wants you he wants you, end of discussion
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
usually hes a really horny person in general but what gets him going is when you wear something revealing, or seeing you naked
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
I'm really not sure about this one chief 🤔
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
he prefers giving, he wants to make sure that you are the one enjoying it
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
fast and rough 100% self explanatory
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He loves quickies, especially if he needs to go to work after cuz then it means he will be in a good mood
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
like I said in the Location part he doesn't care, he will take the risk if it means you'll both feel good
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
he will go for a ton of rounds, that is until you are worned out, for him you could go on for forever
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
he likes to use vibrators, to make you feel even better during sex,, usually its an internal one :3
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
He teases A LOT,, he likes to be a dickhead about it
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
He's really loud, grunts. moans and whimpers will be heard from him all the time you are doing it
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
As I said in the title I imagine him as a switch so he fw everything, especially pegging ;)
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
hes pretty big, but it doesnt show cuz he usually tucks, but lets say 8 inches soft and 9.5 inches when hars :3
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
hes libido is really high. hes horny at all times of the day so ahahah
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
hes an old man. He will fall asleep right after idc
OKAY OKAY THIS IS THE FIRST TIME IVE EVER DONE THIS SO IM SO SORRY IF ITS OOC OR NOT AS GOOD BUT I HOPE YOU ENJOYED!!!
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I have a prompt request because I always want some Adamsapple angst and hurt/comfort. I was reading the posts about Adam having a miscarriage and I was thinking about him having his first miscarriage. Since he probably never saw Eve have one he would probably be scared when it happens to him and he becomes devastated when Lucifer explains what happened since he saw it happen to Lilith many times before Charlie was successfully born. All Lucifer can do is comfort poor Adam while cries over the baby he lost.
"How could this happen? This has never happened." Adam whispered these words to himself over and over as he was sat on his bed, knees pulled to his chest. He was currently wearing a baggy shirt and sweat pants, about an hour ago him and Lucifer got back from the hospital.
Adam had been bleeding a lot, so much so it was cause for concern. Lucifer rushed him to the ER only to find out that he was having a miscarriage.
That word shook Adam to his core. He wasn't so naive that he didn't know what it was, he's heard of people having them.
Eve never had one, why would he? Adam was literally created to make babies, it was his god given purpose in life and now apparently in death too.
If he couldn't even do the one thing he was meant to do right, what good was he?
The doctor tried to tell him that it was perfectly normal for something like this to happen so early on. Adam didn't take in the words, all he could think about was the baby he lost.
It didn't matter if it was the size of a grape, there was a heartbeat. And now that heartbeat is gone, he feels hollow now.
His womb was going through cramps, trying to go back to normal size. Just another cruel reminder.
A sob escaped Adam, he wanted his baby back.
Lucifer quietly entered their bedroom, he had been taking care of the kids they do have getting them lunch. He took the opportunity to make something for Adam in hopes he would eat.
When Apple asked him where her mama was, all Lucifer told her was that Adam wasn't feeling well and needed time to feel better.
He told Charlie the truth though. She was heartbroken for her dad and Adam. She volunteered herself and Vaggie to watch Apple and Lily for the rest of the day so he could be there for Adam.
Lucifer set the plate of food down on the night stand and moved to the other side of the bed. The sight of Adam like this stabbed him in the heart. It brought back memories from when him and Lilith went through this.
He removed his hat, shoes, and coat before crawling on the bed and wrapping an arm around Adam. "Love, is there anything I can do for you?" There was nothing worse than the one you love being in pain and you can do nothing about it.
Adam sobbed harder and buried his face in Lucifer's chest. "Turn back time."
"I would if I could, love. I'd do anything to take this pain away from you." Lucifer placed a kiss in his husband's hair holding him close. "Lilith lost hundreds of babies before we had Charlie."
"I'm not her."
"No you're not, thank god. But what I'm getting at, is the doctor is right these things happen. It doesn't mean you did anything wrong."
"But I-"
"Adam, my love, there is so much more to you than just being a baby making machine. You are funny, musically inclined, witty, the list goes on. I love you for all of you." Lucifer cupped his face. "We have been blessed with two daughters of our own, if we are meant to have more we will. If not...... Then that's fine by me. I want you."
Adam gave him a wobbly smile, eyes still full of tears and red. "I love you, Luci."
"I love you, too, hun. You feel like watching a movie? Even if it's just background noise." Lucifer offered.
"Will you stay?"
"I'm not going anywhere, my love."
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inkdemonapologist · 16 hours
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are you excited for the big role sammy's going to play in Cage?? im apprehensive... i love him a feral amount and i was real disappointed with his 2 seconds of screentime in BatDR
also just saying ur sammy drawings give me life he looks wonderful in hats
brought to u by ⭐️ anon
Hehehe aw thank you!! :D
There’s a lot of things in Dark Revival I ended up disappointed about, but despite my love of Sammy Lawrence, Sammy barely appearing was not really one of them. At the time, I’d commented to friends that the complete lack of Sammy mentions in the hype leading up to BatDR meant he was either very important or had only a cameo appearance, and I was actually pretty delighted about the Cyclebreaker cameo – it’s a moment that takes him startlingly seriously, that wasn’t just him quoting one of his four catch phrases; it’s... a kind of moment we haven’t seen from Sammy before. The part where he gets shot was like, where my expectations were, so the cyclebreaker thing was a pleasant surprise.
But like, ever since The Cage was announced… we knew Sammy kind of had to be in it. Like, Henry says “how did WE escape” and it’s set in the SPECIFIC place and time that Sammy also is; literally the only reason for Sammy to not be a significant character is if the creators actually didn’t want anything to do with him. So I have to admit the announcement that WE CAN CONFIRM that SAMMY WILL PLAY A MAJOR ROLE IN THE CAGE!!!!!!! RESTORED TO HIS CHAPTER 2 CREEPY GLORY! is just…… ugh, it’s hard to articulate why this tweet frustrates me so much.
Like………………….. "he's in it more" is not the only thing people care about, surely! What is he doing? What is his role in all this? What does he even WANT? In a review, "he's back to his chapter 2 creepy glory" would be a powerful recommendation; in a tweet from the creator right after preorders go up, it feels more like, "Hey, remember the thing you wanted? we DEFINITELY did that thing you wanted and we did it SUPER WELL so preorder our game please!!" Give us an intriguing line of dialogue or a hint about what he's doing (opposing you? helping you? uneasy truce? trying to find bendy?) and you wouldn't even need to promise us that he plays a major role; we'd be curious to learn more.
So this reassurance ends up doing the opposite, for me, because I still don't know if the creators even understand what I like about Sammy. The thing is that the circumstances of BatDR (there's a little Bendy running around, the Ink Demon is claimed dead but actually it's not, Wilson is trying to become the Lost Ones' new Big Brother) could've been INCREDIBLY relevant to Sammy -- that's why people wanted him to show up in BatDR, to see what he thinks of these developments and how he would react to them!! So if you're interested in Sammy, the character, then it would not be hard to hint at like, what his deal is – "Sammy knows the Ink Demon is out there somewhere and Henry is the key to finding him" or "after the disappearance of his Lord he's become a desperate man who's as much an obstacle as an ally" or even "Sammy was defiant when he went into the Pit -- what will Henry find when he encounters him now?" or w/e -- simply insisting HES LIKE HE WAS IN CHAPTER TWO, THE ONE YOU GUYS LIKE instead of being able to think of a single character-based hint that we might find compelling is, tbh, rather un-reassuring!!!
My complaint about Twisted Alice’s role in BatDR was that ultimately, it felt like they were just trying to capture the vibes that Twisted Alice had in BatIM instead of really exploring what that character would be doing HERE, in THIS situation. Nothing she’s doing really makes sense, and what IS there seems to have forgotten what her actual deal is, but she’s doing it with the right flair, so it feels like she’s in-character enough for the scene to be fun. Like an episodic cartoon that just forgets what happened in previous episodes depending on who’s writing this one. So… I think that’s a real risk for Sammy. For the people who just want him to show up and whisper cult-ish things so we can hear his voice more and go HEHEHE ITS HIM, this isn’t really a concern lmao, that will probably happen. I don’t have high hopes that he’ll make sense as a character, but tbf I don’t know that he ever has.
And IDK, its still early, its possible the cage will come out and I'll look up spoilers and be like OMG NM I LOVE WHAT THEY DID WITH HIM. A game that's supposed to be psychological horror could, in theory, be a really fun place for Sammy!! Maybe the people actually writing him will give him more care, haha. It's a little silly for me to be so worked up about the marketing for a game that I am not going to buy b/c I’m still not interested in giving JDS, Inc. my money. AND YET DESPITE IT ALL I STILL… CARE ABOUT SAMMY LAWRENCE LMAO….. I think my main emotion about The Cage is just curiosity, though. I do want to know what they do with him. I’m curious if he’ll play a major part in the story, or if he’s like Henry or Porter in BatDR, with one big scene where he gets a bunch of lines and then runs off. A lot of people really want to see Henry and Sammy team up in this, but I’m not writing off the possibility he’s an antagonist of some kind, so I’m curious which way that’ll go. But I don’t feel like I have any strong expectations, so I guess we’ll see!
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ashdreams2023 · 2 days
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Hi! can you do a quick oneshot, about Loki x reader who was an eating disorder, and he begs them to eat. I am sorry if this is weird request. Thank you ❤️
Nah it’s not I’ve done a couple with the same theme before
Trigger warning: ED {eating disorder}
Patience
You rubbed your eyes tiredly and sigh, you stare at your partner sitting across from you, his eyes red and exhausted.
You know tired he is from this topic and that you’ve talked about this a million times but each time it ends the same.
He sniffed and pulled your legs off the floor and close to your chest "I’m fine…I already ate"
"A half glass of milk in the past three days is not a meal" He said sounding tired, his voice raspy, as if he was screaming for a while. He was choked.
You shrugged "I’m not hungry…I feel nauseous, leave me alone"
Loki rubbed his face then stood up and walked to your side and pulled your arm making you stand up straight, his eyes met yours.
"You haven’t eaten a single full meal in days, not even snacks…you’re literally living off air and a half glass of milk to give the illusion that you ate something heavy in your stomach!"
"Don’t yell at me!" You pulled you arm away and clenched your fists "You don’t know what it’s like! You think I want to be like this?! That I’m happy this way?! No! So just…back off! I’m tired too!" You screamed and stepped back until your body pressed against the wall then without any other warning busted off into tears.
Loki stood there in shock for a few seconds before going over to you and trying to pull you into his embrace but you struggled and failed quickly leading you to crying your heart out against his chest and gripping onto his top tightly.
"Every time I eat I vomit! I can’t I can’t…it makes me sick…please Loki please don’t make me do it!"
Loki swallowed and held you tight "Shhh, I’m not gonna force you to do anything…I just want you to be ok, please breath"
You coughed and sniffed, hiding your face on his chest, his arms were strong but you could feel his hands shaking slightly.
"I don’t know what to do…" you confessed.
He took a deep breath "Perhaps we can start…small, I just need you to understand that I know you’re doing your best but I still need you to cooperate with me, that’s all I ask"
Your breathing slowly become regular but you didn’t push away, your had a slight headache but nothing you couldn’t handle "Do you think I’m a burden for how I am?"
"No, don’t ever say that! I will take care of you, I have lived long centuries and went to war many times, believe me when I say my patience could not break that easily"
"You’ll still help me?"
"Yes, as much as you need"
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