#like right now im just sitting in an empty parking lot with my door open watching the sunset and thinking about life

[prodbyton]

જ⁀➴ dirty little secret chapter 7: bye baby

half smau, half written. wc. under 1k warnings: kissing

even after you and anton wanted more from each other physically after that night in his apartment, your schedules never aligned properly for you two to actually do anything. it left you both hot and bothered, sneaking off during the day to make out and grope each other before you had to part for the day.

like now, you were antons lap in the backseat of his car in the parking lot of your apartment, hands buried in his hair and his hands groping your ass as you two kiss each other like you'll never see each other again.

"yn-" anton breathes out in between your kisses, and you hum before going back to kissing him. "i have to go," his warning words make you stop, frowning against his lips before you pull away with a pout. you were just so cute, he felt bad knowing he had to leave you.

"you cant miss one practice?" you whine, pouting even more.

"im the captain," he almost laughs, if he could he would totally skip a practice to spend more time with you, but his roll was too important and you both knew that.

"don't you have a co captain?"

"yn..." you sigh, and he presses a soft kiss to your forehead and you understand that he has to go. you climb off of his lap, sitting on the other side of his backseat while you think of another way for you both to see each other.

"what about after practice then? i can sneak you in, i don't think my brother would mind you coming over" you hope that it convinces him, but the way his ears turn red after you say it makes you frown.

he wishes that your brother was one of his biggest obstacles in having you fully, it was too much of a risk for you to sneak him in, it was honestly a risk with him dropping you off at the apartment you shared with him, but he tried his best to not let that flood his nerves.

"i want you just as bad, but i wanna take you out first before we do anything" anton groans, running a hand through his hair. you cant help the smile that creeps on your face, the way he held himself back until you two were actually dating before you two went further made you grow more fond of the boy. but you cant deny that it also made you want him more.

"such a gentleman, and when is this date you speak of?"

"how about friday night? i have early practice, and i can pick you up after" you have to hold back a giggle from how cute he was with that hopeful smile on his face, and you pretend to think for a second before you finally answer him.

"i think i can clear out my schedule for that,"

"great," he leans over the empty space between you two so he can place a quick kiss to your lips "now i really have to go, okay?"

"fine," you roll your eyes, doing your fake pout once again as anton gets out of the car so he can open your door for you. once you're out of the car, you let anton engulf you in a tight hug. "you'll call me when you get home, right?" you murmur into his chest, and he presses his lips to your forehead while you two enjoy your last few minutes together for the day.

"of course, i'll call you baby"

"baby?" you pull back from him, blinking in surprise at the new name as you look up at him. he just smiles, a little nervous as he tries to gauge your reaction.

"do you like it?" you nod, bringing your hands up to the back of antons neck so you can pull him in for another kiss. it was softer, holding him close to you before you pull away, and you smirk when you hear him fail at holding back a whimper at the loss of contact.

"mhm, now go, don't be late for practice baby" you smile as you walk away, letting your hand drag along his chest as you leave and all anton can do is stare at you as you enter your building. it took everything in him to not forget about practice and go after you in that moment.

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a/n: bro tumblr actually stupid asf i had to rewrite half of this cuz it deleted my mf draft...

synopsis: living with your older brother had its perks, including easy access to his hot best friend

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[alanaaii]

Hot boxin’ w connie.☆

!plug connie │ yall jus best friends

“where is my mfn’ gloss?”

you were searching through your makeup bag before you heard your phone ring. You look over and see nothing but a big red heart—it was connie— as the facetime connected you set your phone up, still looking in your makeup bag.

“what’re you doin right now ma?”

you lift your head to look at the screen. you see connie in his car, windows tinted and led lights on blue. “im looking for my lipgloss i just bought..where you going?".

“coming to pick you up. be ready.”

before you could say another word he hung up. leaving you speechless.

But you knew connie drove fast and you had to get ready quick.

you slip on some black shorts. Your undercheeks very visible. Adding a light pink tank top. you admired yourself in the mirror before sitting down and fixing your lashes and edges nothing too extra. to top it off you put on some shiny lipgloss—not the one you was looking for but this will do. As you sprayed yourself with perfume you get a text.

outside

you feel those butterflies in your tummy and tingling in your panties. connie was your best friend so why did he make you feel like this? you two shared kisses from time to time but that was it. this nigga got you in ya feels. you texted back with a simple ok.

you grabbed your small telfar bag and slid on some slides. you walk out and lock your apartment door behind you. connie was waiting outside of his car, opening the door for you. looking GOODT.

“you just get finer every time i see yo ass”

your heart was doing backflips. you gave connie a hug and smelled his strong cologne with a hint of weed. “thank you connie” you said as he led you into his car. the smell of weed literally punching you in the face. you hopped in the passenger seat and reclined the seat a little.

“thank you connie”

connie shook his head.

“naw i jus wanted to see you mama”

mann you just wanted to hop in the back seat and let this man twist your insides like a pretzel. he always knew how do make you smile.

Connie took his car off of park and began to drive. he gave you his phone to put some music on. you played a song connie only knew because of you.

playing : Leave em alone by quality control ft..

(u can replace that w any song.)

you smirk at connie knowing this song put you in your feels. you started singing acting like you was in a music video. touching connie n getting up and throwing some ass.

“fat butt sit down before you get us pulled over”

you two laughed together as you sat down.

connie soon pulled into a almost empty parking lot.

“get in the back” “what?” “you heard me”

connie got out of the car to get in the back while you just crawled to the back.

his seats in the back were comfy and warm. he pulled out a small bag and started to roll up.

“get comfy ma, you with me”

you slid your slides off as you put your legs over connie’s. you never felt scared around connie, you knew he would keep you safe no matter what. once he was done licking and wrapping, he lit it up and took the first hit, then giving it to you. you put your glossy lips on the blunt but connie didn’t care. his mind was on something else. he was focused on rubbing your thighs n feet.

you and connie talked for a while, going back and fourth with the blunt. But the car was getting hot and smokey. “con i need some air”

connie just ignored you and suddenly pressed his lips on yours. desperate whines coming from you as his tongue slithered into your mouth.

in between the kiss, you straddle him as you snake your arms around his neck. You could feel connie get hard under you. you knew where this was going. you hear connie inhale. “you smell so fucking good.”

in one quick motion connie flipped you on your back. dropping his head between your thighs. “let me taste you”

you were already soaked from the touching n kissing you didn’t want nothing more than for connie to make you cum. you slid your shorts and panties off, throwing them into the front. Legs open in front of connie. he used two fingers to spread you open, your slick lubricating his fingers as he went down on you. his pink lips kissing your pussy before he started to lick your clit. you were drowning in pleasure and ecstasy. connie was eating like it was his last meal.

“fuckkk” was the only word you could let out. as his warm wet tongue flicked your bean , your mind went blank. your legs began to shake-you knew you were coming to your breaking point. you bucked your hips on connie’s mouth as he swirled his tongue over your pussy. he held onto your thighs stopping you from moving. if the car wasn’t hot before, it was extremely hot now.

connie slid two fingers into your hole, hitting the right spot over and over again. Your orgasm building up in your core. You came all over connie’s fingers. “conniee” you cried out. he did not stop , over stimulating your cunt. you shakily pushed his head away. his chin and lips just glistening with your cum. “round 2?”

Likes, reblogs and follows are always appreciated! ♡

[3rr0rc0d3]

He's my valentine~ // Best Friend!John "Soap" Mctavish x Mafia!Male!Reader

You and Johnny have been friends for a damn long time, what happens when you slowly realize you have feelings for the man? Does he love you back? Surely he does right? Surely. But how can he love a man like you? Someone that does the things you do.

Chap 1 : Night time Maccies run.

[Prologue][Chap 2]

CW : Mafia and Military inaccuracies ( I am in neither lord so help me), somewhat vague descriptions of gore, blood, implied torture, murder, kidnapping, reader vaping and the two besties being gross.

“Around what time do you think you’re coming home Johnny?” You asked, as you talked to him through the phone.

“I'll be home around two in the morning, I'll have tae get ye to open the door for me lad.” Johnny responded happily to which you nodded and looked back at the tied up debtor in front of you.

“Right, I'll see you when you get to the house, yeah? I gots to get back to work.” You smiled and he let out a whine.

“But- Ah whatever i'll see ya later lad.” He muttered as he begrudgingly ended the call. You silently put your phone back in your pocket and smile at the captive in front of you.

“Hmph… Now where were we?” You sighed.

—

You leaned against your car, having come to the base instead of having him come to your shared apartment. You stood up properly when you saw Johnny, who seemed to look extra happy to see you since he quickly ran up and hugged you.

He smelled of wet grass, gunpowder, sweat and…blood. Did you care? No. Why would you? After all, your job is not as different as you'd like to think. You knew as a man in the military he would have to get his hands bloody eventually.

“Cmon Johnny, let's go home. You must be tired, huh?” You smirk, teasing him a little, to which he nods and sits on the passenger side. You glance over, checking to see if he's all buckled in, and he is. Sleeping too, his head leaned against the window, body slumped on the seat a little, it made you chuckle, shake your head and start your quiet drive to your home. A quaint thing, you had bought it a couple years back and started living with Johnny there. Johnny on the way home wakes up, all grumpy, stomach growling and all.

“I’m hungry…” Johnny grumbled and looked at you while putting his hand on his stomach, still sitting wrong on the seat.

“You want Maccies?” You asked, eyes flicking towards him, he gives you a nod and you nod in return, setting your course to the nearest mcdonalds. Soon after you arrive the two of you go through the drive through.

“Can I please get a large big mac meal with large fries, no pickles on that one please, a large coke with that one, yeah. And can I get a large iced latte, caramel syrup please and a large fries.”

“And an oreo McFlurry…”

“And an Oreo McFlurry.” You repeated and pulled up to the next window, paying for it, then pulling up to the next window.

“Thanks.” Johnny mumbled as he slowly started waking up fully.

“No problem. Don't need to pay me back for this one love, just dont choke right?” You chuckle as you hand him the paper bag full of food and drive to the large empty parking lot after rolling the window up. Johnny hands you your fries and drink before digging in on his burger, you chuckle and wipe a crumb off his face.

"Got work tomorrow morning?" Johnny asked with his mouth full.

"Nah, but I will take work calls just in case they need help, I'm all yours while you're home though." You say as you sip on your iced latte and eat a few chips.

"Thas good. Thas good… " Johnny smiled and finished up his burger, burping loudly making the two of you laugh.

"Jeeeesus man, you burp like yer dad!." You say while panting slightly from laughing too much.

"Nuh uh!"

"Yuh huh!"

"Call 'im!"

"Maybe I will… not… It's 3:40 am dude. Big man would kill me if I did." You both shudder at the thought of Johnny's dad all grumpy and woken up in the middle of the night just to be asked a silly question. He just nods in understanding of you not wanting to die that way.

"Head home?" Johnny asked and you nodded. You soon started your drive home, it was quiet and peaceful, so much so that Johnny had fallen back asleep. The ride home was still long anyways, you had time to think…

—

"Please! Ill have the money by next week! I swear, i just need more ti- Gh!" The man struggled against one of your goons' hand as he was grabbed by the throat and held up high against the wall. Tou walk up to the lowlife slowly, taking a puff of your vape, your favorite flavor.

"You're pathetic eh? Lowlife scum gamblin everythin away while your missus and kids struggle at home huh?" You scoff and blow the smoke right into his face becore nodding to your men, letting the man drop.

"Im gonna fuckin make you beg for death."

—

You had killed before this was recent so it was fresh on your mind, you had killed the man just today but had started on him last week, it only took a day for the man to finally break and start begging to be set free, and two days to start begging to die. Then, you killed him.

—

"Sir, cleanup crew will be here half past 2." One of your subordinates informed you, with you crouched over the disemboweled man in front of you. His disfigured face permanently locked in a state of horror. Blood all over your hands and soles of your shoes along with the clear apron you wore to protect your clothes, after all you didnt want to have to either burn your clothes nor try to get the bloodstains out.

—

You sigh softly, now just pulling into your garage, you unbuckle yourself then johnny, smiling tp yourself as you carry the man to his room.

"Night shithead." You whisper softly and go to walk off but he stops you by pulling you into bed with him. He holds you tight, giving you no room to wiggle your way out. Soon enough you feel yourself falling asleep, your eyes feeling heavier and heavier.

SO SORRY THAT WAS SO LATE SCHOOL IS LITERAL HELL- AAAANYWAYS HERES MY masterlist AND AND AND UH... HERE EAT UP!!!!

[goldenfreddys]

september ‘04, cont.— she drives at 90 by the barbies and kens.

From what Jeremy could see from the large glass doors of the entrance, the parking lot appeared to be empty, save for a beat-up muscle car one could assume belonged to Mike.

The sun was just clearing the treeline, illuminating the city’s endless blur of sagging chain link fences, cracked pavement and auto garages in warm, muted tones. There were a lot of trees, he thought, interspersed with residential lots in a way that made him feel as though trapped in a perpetual suburb. Moving here was a mistake. He'd been trying to stifle that particular train of thought, but by now, it had risen to the top of his mind and solidified into a thick, greasy layer.

He pulled out his phone.

WHERE R U … NADS BBY

Jeremy pressed his lips together and waited for a reply. Knowing Nadia, she halfway woke up to turn off her alarm, and forgetting why she set it, went right back to sleep. Still, a sliver of doubt stirred in his chest— what if something happened? What if she got in a car accident?

The door rattled a little as he tried to open it, but didn't budge. It was locked.

A surge of panic shot through him.

Was there a side door? He swore there must’ve been a side door, though he couldn’t remember where. The front entrance would probably be locked until the pizzeria opened at nine.

He would know if Nadia wasn’t doing good- they’ve been best friends for years. She would’ve told him if she wasn’t okay. Right? She’d been staying up late, a lot. Just restless, she said. Although, sometimes girls said things like that when they wanted you to clue in on something. Was she fine? Or was she quote-unquote ‘fine’? And was she quote-unquote ‘fine’ as in ‘I’m mad at you’ or quote-unquote ‘fine’ as in ‘I will be committing suicide this weekend’? His lungs felt tight.

There was a small shuffle from the prize corner.

Jeremy turned to see the animatronic marionette out of its box, staring at him from a distance. It quirked its head to the side.

“I’m sorry.” He said, “I’ve got that uh, panic disorder swag. It’s part of my primal charisma.”

The Marionette continued staring for a moment, before turning and drifting towards the main hallway. It paused by the entrance of the hall and looked back at him.

“Do you… Do you want me to…?”

It motioned limply for him to follow.

“Okay.”

Unlike the other animatronics, the puppet seemed to be carried around by unseen wires, though he wasn't sure exactly how that worked. It all seemed a bit too advanced for a mid-sized business during an economic recession.

Jeremy could hear muffled voices at the end of the hall, from the security office.

“I swear-”

“Come on, doll, it's not that hard to get someone to cover for me.”

“On such short notice? It kind of is. Let's see; Chucky is allergic to social interaction with other human beings,”

“That's true.”

“And Sean is gonna throw an absolute fit if he has to do an actual job.”

“I know, but-”

“Look, I'll figure it out. But you owe me big time, Mikey…”

Jeremy glanced around before approaching the entrance of the office, noticing the Marionette had gone without a trace when he wasn't looking.

Mike was sitting on the desk as a heavyset man with dark skin fussed over a copy of the weekly schedule. He looked well-groomed in the way people with a better salary generally do.

The two looked at him.

“What's up?” Mike asked.

“The entrance was locked.”

“You can open it from the inside. You don't need a key, there's a knob below the handle.”

“Oh. Thanks.” Jeremy gave Mike a visibly trembling thumbs up.

The better-paid man—Eugene S.—glanced at Mike and remarked, “Is he good?”

“He told me nothing happened during his shift, so yeah. I think he's probably just on drugs.”

“Well, tell him not to do drugs on company property. We’ve got policies about that.”

They continued squabbling as if they had forgotten Jeremy was still in the room at all. His cell phone buzzed.

Nadia had replied:

FUCK SRY TT IM OMW

Jeremy took a breath, “I’m gonna go, now. Also um, FYI, I'm not a druggie. Just neurotic, which is- which is something you can’t legally fire me for… I’m pretty sure.”

He gave them a half-hearted wave before quickly turning and making his way back down to the entrance. A feeling of intense embarrassment gripped him as he walked, eyes on the glossy checkered flooring. The collar of his button-up was kind of tight. His new work shoes weren’t broken in, yet. The whole building had a sort of grating electric hum. He knew instinctively that if anything stopped him on the way out, he would surely have to rip his own skin off then and there.

Nadia affectionately coined the phrase ‘bitch-mode in overdrive’ to describe this particular state.

At the very least, there was a knob underneath the handle of the entrance that unlocked the door. Crisp morning air filled his lungs. Sunlight and birdsong. The low rumble of Nadia’s black sedan.

A song from Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge was, as always, blasting from her stereo as he got in. She grabbed the back of his head and pressed a too-forceful kiss to his cheek, tumbling out apologies that he could only faintly hear over the music.

Jeremy cracked a small smile as the bassline thrummed in his bones.

[mystargirl-interlude]

SHADES OF COOL

could be read on its own or as a part three of mirrorball

y/n's album :

Two days have passed since my weekly performance at the bar and it is now Monday which means my debut album comes out in one week  and me and Eddie may have splurged a bit to advertise the album in larger cities across the globe.

Pulling up the the school I'm met by the staring of nearly everyone in the lot, quickly speed walking over to eddies van I bombard him with questions asking why everyone is staring at me

"Eddie, Eddie, Eddie" I say while sprinting over to him

"Why the fuck is everyone staring at me" I ask

"apparently someone from the school found saw us at the bar and told everyone, but hey its fine I mean it was bound to happen, word travels fast in a small ass town. he reassures me

"you're right" I reply sighing

"w-" im cut off by the bell ringing

":guess that's our que" he says

"yep" I quickly reply

walking into class I head to the back to sit in my usual chair, going to put my bag in the seat next to me which is usually empty I notice this time its not. Looking up I see the one and only Billy Hargrove sitting next to me

"oh sorry I thought the seat was empty"

I say looking away quickly

"no worries" he replies and then its just a few seconds of awkward silence

"hey I know this is a really far reach but do you wanna hang out later after school?" I hear him ask.

thinking I heard him wrong I turn my head towards him

"sorry?" I question

'I said do you wanna hang out later?" her repeats chuckling

:Yeah totally!" I quickly reply

turning away to give my attention back to the teacher.

I then feel him slide me a note saying to meet him at the parking lot after school

After along 7 hours of school im finally meeting billy in the parking lot

"hey!" he says to me wrapping his arm around my shoulder

"hey" I reply with a large grin.

walking to his car I receive 10x the amount of stares than this morning but I pay no mind to it. getting inside his car I see a younger girl come our way on a skate board from  the middle school

"that's my dads wife's daughter, just ignore her" he says with a tone that I can't quite put my finger on

she opens the back door and immediately looks at me and rolls her eyes

"a new girl already?" she says with a scoff

"when are you ever going to learn to shut the fuck up maxine" billy replies loudly

I don't want to get involved so I stay quiet.

about halfway through the car ride I turn my body around to face max

"hey, you're really pretty" I whisper so only she can hear but terribly fail.

she scoots a bit closer to me

so at this point we are almost touching noses both grinning

"thanks so are you" she says with a slight laugh

"most of the girls he bring home dont even look my way, so I really appreciate this" she says backing up

I give her one last smile before turning back to my original position. its shocks me how mature she is for her age. I look at the corner of my eye to billy and see him trying to bite back his smile.

when we get to the house max gets out first and me and billy follow her into the house.

I know Billys reputation in Hawkins isn't the best and he's known for sleeping with girls and never talking to them again but a part of me feels like this is going to be different, or at least hoping its going to me different. I see him in constant fights at school and always living in shades of cool, but I hope fix him, make him better.

walking into his room I take a look around, observing my surroundings. sitting down on his bed we begin talking about the most random things and as the minutes pass by we get closer and closer to each other without realizing it until we our faces are basically touching. we both stop talking and just observe each others faces.

billy takes his chance and locks our lips together into a heated make-out session and im guessing you know what's going to happen next.

we are both laying on the bed under the covers afterward, we got dressed and decided to get comfortable until we hear a car door slam and the front door open, I feel billy tense up next to me and quickly get up. as he walks out the door I hear shouting and it goes on for a good minute and I decided for crack the door open to see what's going on and I see billy being shoved against a wall and punched by who I assume is his dad.

my eyes widening I quickly but quietly close the door and sit back down on the bed.

eventually billy comes back in the room with red eyes

"are you okay" I whisper

I see his face quickly harden

"you need to get the fuck out of my house." he says with no emotion

"im sorry?" I say making sure I heard him right

"you were just a quick fuck and now you need to get the fuck out!"

"billy let me remind you that you fucking drove me here"

"then find a way home I dont care, now leave!" we yells back and this has basically become a yelling match

"god im so stupid" I scoff walking out going the direction of my house

Billy Hargrove

I ruined the only good thing I had going for me.

she was the one person I enjoyed being around and I cant even keep her around.

Her pov

as soon as I get home I plug in my heated blanket and grab my notebook and start writing until my hand cramps up. two  hour later I come out with a song called  Norman fucking Rockwell! and seven I also made the dumb decision the call Eddie and see if we can get this on the album one week before it comes out luckily we made the changes and were able to have that and one other song.

the next day I get out of my car and see billy with his arms around another girl.

I dont know what I expected. eyes watering I look away and make my way to class.

Billy ignored me the entire day but of course out came a song that I called shades of cool.

during lunch me and Eddie were messing around in the music room trying to find different beats for both songs unfortunately we had to get back to class but the school is going to be open after school due to basket ball practice. after school me and Eddie bolt towards the music room to meet his band mates to help us.

after an hour of messing around with the keyboards and other instruments we come up the the beat to nfr and I start recording right away

Billy Hargrove

basket ball practice ran one fucking hour over. the last 20 minutes of practice was for the freshman training so I didn't have to be there so I decided to walk around the school to see iff Tina was still here. passing by all the empty classrooms I hear talking a music coming out of one of them, I come to find out that its the music room so I pay no attention to it until I hear a familiar voice and I realize that its Y/N, quietly walking up to the cracked door I stand there to listen.

I hear the voice of Munson and y/n talking and then the music start up again.

God damn, man child you fucked me so good I almost said I love you.

that was the intro to the song and my first impressions where that it was either about me or Eddie but I doubt Eddie because they look very platonic and I'm pretty sure eddies gay.

as I hear the song end I bolt out of the school with my mind running a million miles an hour and decide to just sleep on it.

spring break is the next day so me and my "family" are going back to California for the week which gives me time to think on the whole y/n thing

her pov

The band and I have been working dusk till dawn every day a long with our producer jack (please tell me you get the reference) and Eddie has been talking to his friend from Chicago who's dad works for the music festival lollapalooza but unfortunately spring break comes to an end and we have to go back to school.

Entering the school parking lot I immediately spot billy surprisingly not with a new girl. me and Eddie are talking about what to do after school when the bell cuts him off and everyone starts heading in, walking to the doors I pass by billy without batting and eye towards him.

I have first period with Billy and not even five minutes into class I hear the intercom come on and its calling me and Eddie to the front office and as she's still talking I already hear snickers from girls around me, rolling my eyes I grab my stuff heading out the door to meet Eddie since he's only next door

"what do you think we did this time" he asks

"literally nothing, I haven't been in school in 1 week and we've been back for five minutes" I reply in a hurry

as we get to the office the front desk lady hands us to envelopes, confused we both grab the paper and I check the information and my eyes widen as I see its coming from Chicago.

"oh my fucking god, Eddie do you think its him" I ask

ripping open the paper

I skim over the paragraph and see the confirmation telling us we have a spot at 5:30 pm at Lollapalooza at the main west stage

"HOLY SHIT" we both scream grabbing his hand running through the halls as the bell rings we head to the music room knowing the band is there because we happen to all have a free period

we happen to pass billy talking to Tina but I'm too excited to care but he gives us a confused look as we bolt pass him

"y/n!" I hear billy yell but my feet cannot slow down from all the adrenaline.

We tell the band about everything that has happened and to make everything better our album comes out tomorrow and I have been to scared to check the record pre orders so we are going to wait until midnight when the album is officially out. after calming down we all head to our next class and before we know it its lunch time so I head out to go to the field outside to spend lunch on the bleachers. writing in my journal I hear footsteps and feel someone sit next to me, not bothering to look up I hear them clear their throat and finally looking up I see its billy.

"oh fuck n-" I yell before getting cut off

"please just let me speak" he says sounding defeated

"I know what I did was fucked up but I'm not used to someone seeing what you saw.. actually no one has, and I really like you and I want to make this work and I know we don't know each other well so I understand if you need time or want to start slo-" I cut him off my slapping him in the face with all my force

"fUCk you have a lot of force for such a small person"

"thank you." I say just above a whisper

"for what?"

"for apologizing, not everyone would do that, but yeah I'm going to need some time but I also want to make this work" I say with a smile

his face turns into a grin before he gets this look like he remembered something

"yeah?" I ask

" so I went to California this year and on the drive there I saw this billboard.."

"oh! um yeah about that"

"I'm really proud of you" he says

"thank you" I quietly say

"can I hear it?' he asks

"meet me right here after school" I say getting up as I hear the bell ring

he smiles getting up with me

walking down the bleachers together we begin going our separate ways before I stop

"billy!" I yell

he turns around with a confused look and I run up to him giving him a light kiss

I start to pull back but then he grabs my head pulling me into a deeper kiss. both smiling into it we pull apart

"see ya after" I grin walking away

authors note:

UGH IM SORRY THAT TOOK SO LONG TO WRITE I have been writing this one chapter since July its not even funny and its only 2.1k words lmfao but here it is

[phantom-ellie]

The Art of (Smashing) Crockery Chapter 26: Radio Silence

Click here for CWs/Full Chapter List

It’s one in the afternoon when Ed finally trudges back to his apartment with a giant headache and feeling no better than he had before. He knew it would be a bad idea to see Jack. How long had this bender been? Ed shrugs to himself. Who would even care?

He heads straight to his room and plugs his phone into the charger before depositing himself on the bed. He stares at the ceiling, feeling sorry for himself. Hoping that maybe with the couple days of distance, he and Stede can… start over? Ed doesn’t know if he wants that. He doesn’t know if he can just be Stede’s friend.

He doesn’t know if he can be who Stede needs him to be right now.

His phone starts buzzing like crazy, and Ed squints and picks it up as it begins to charge. He’s hit with a flood of notifications. Texts, missed calls from the whole crew, Izzy, numbers he doesn’t even recognize.

He sits up and isn’t even sure where to begin. Text after text begging him to pick up his phone. Did they think Ed was in trouble? It was nice to be cared about.

Out of habit, he opens his favorite blog, wondering what Stede has been up to.

That is the last peaceful thought he has for a long time.

The blog post. The group chat notifications. The texts from Izzy. And of course, from Stede.

Stede: ok, i understand Stede: i wont bother you anymore, ed Stede: dont feel bad, nothing was your fault

Holy fucking shit.

He doesn’t even think to do anything else, dialing Stede’s number on repeat, getting frustrated with each failure to pick up. He can’t call anyone else, what if Stede calls him back? With furious tears he shoots off a desperate message.

Ed: Stede mate pick up the phonr

There’s a pause of a good two minutes as Ed dials and redials and dials and redials. Then…

Stede: i don't feel like talking

Thank fuck.

Ed: im sorry for everything, tell me where you are and ill come get you

Stede: i cant Stede: it's too far

Ed: too far from ehat

Stede: i don't want people to see me Stede: i don't want to hear i told you so anymore Stede: tell them to stop flooding my phone Stede: please

Ed: pcik up the phone Ed: talk to me

Stede: if I tell you where i am will you tell everypne

Ed: ill come get you

Stede: i don't want mary and the kids to be scared

Ed: why do you think they'd be scared

Stede: can you come alone

Should Ed go alone? Should he bring someone, an ambulance, he’s not trained for this, he doesn’t know how to…

Ed: yes Ed: anything man

Stede: ok Stede: im at pigeon point

Ed: the lighthouse?

Stede: yes

Ed: im coming there now, will you call me and stay on the phone so I can hear that you're safe?

Stede: I cant

Ed: will you wait for me to get down there?

Stede: i think Stede: 2 hours Stede: cant wait anymore

Ed: dont fuckjnf move

Ed shoots off a quick text to Lucius telling him that he’ll have more information soon, and books it for his bike. He doesn’t have time to call anyone else. They’ll have to find out about it later.

He tears off from his parking spot, grateful that he can weave in and out of traffic on his bike. Pigeon point is an hour’s drive from his location.

Fifty minutes later, Ed pulls up to the parking lot outside of the lighthouse, spotting Stede’s car as he turns into the parking lot. It looks empty, dark. Ed parks his bike and runs towards it, hoping to search for a sign of where Stede might have gone. Luckily, he doesn’t have to.

Stede is in the driver’s seat, bent over, forehead pressed against the steering wheel. For a moment Ed thinks that he’s passed out, or… worse… but when he approaches the window Stede turns his head to glance at him before reaching over to unlock the passenger-side door. Ed walks around the car and slips inside.

“Stede… oh my god, I’m so sorry I didn’t pick up before, I can explain-”

“Don’t.” Stede’s forehead is still against the steering wheel. He’s looking straight ahead, eyes red, voice shaky. “You don’t have to. I’m too tired to listen.”

“Let me drive you home, okay? You’re going to be fine.”

Stede slowly shakes his head. “Fuck, I’m so messed up, Ed.” He puts his head in his hands. Ed places a hand on Stede’s back, moving it back and forth, and Stede shudders at the touch.

“You aren’t messed up, Stede. Your life is messed up. That isn’t you.”

“You don’t… you don’t know. It’s nice of you to want to see the best in me. You’re the only one who does, I think. But it doesn’t matter. It’s all fallen apart and I can’t fix it.” Stede is crying now.

“Just talk to me, okay? Get it out. I’ll listen.”

“It’s just… why?” Stede wipes tears from his eyes, which look like they’re made of glass. “Why did I have to go and prove them all right? Do you know how hard I’ve tried? I did everything right. I gave up everything that made me happy to prove them wrong. And I still couldn’t.”

“Wrong about what?”

“I can’t…” He swallows and shakes his head. “I’m… gay. I’ve always been gay. And everyone knew it but me. Everyone.”

Ed scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. “I mean… yeah… we kind of did. But it isn’t a bad thing…” His voice trails off as Stede begins to sob harder.

“You don’t understand. It’s something good to you. But to me it’s…” Stede searches for the right word. “It’s failure. It was the one thing I had to prove them all wrong about me. I had pride in defying their expectations because… god… I’ve failed to meet expectations my whole life, Ed. Every time. But I put everything on this. I wasn’t going to fail. But I did.”

“Being gay isn’t a failing, Stede. I’m gay, most of your friends are gay. Do you think they’re failures for that?”

“No, but…” He rocks forward and back a little. “If they’re right about this, if I am who they say I am… they must be right about everything else.”

“You’re wrong. They aren’t.”

“How do you know? How do I know? I don’t know anything about myself. I’m nothing. I’m broken and I’ve always been broken.”

“You aren’t broken because you’re gay, Stede.”

“I’m broken because I’m me.” Stede whispers as he places his forehead back on the steering wheel, gripping the bottom of it so hard his knuckles turn white.

“I don’t think you’re broken.” I love who you are.

“You don’t have to live with me every day. You don’t have to think these thoughts. And I’m happy for you, Ed.” He closes his eyes. “No one should have to feel this way. I’m glad Mary is leaving me. I’ll give her everything. They are going to be so happy without me.”

“Stede…”

“Ed.” Stede sighs and finally looks over. “I'm sorry that I fucked everything up between us.”

“Why are we here, Stede? What are you planning?” Ed moves his hand to Stede’s shoulder and grips it, hard. He knows the answer to his own question, and is confident that he can stop it. But it breaks his heart all the same.

“I was… I was going to drive off the cliff.” Ed nods and looks ahead at the water. “Or drive into the water from the beach. I read… drowning, it feels good. It’s peaceful. It’s the way I’ve always imagined doing it.”

Ed squeezes his shoulder harder. “How often have you imagined… doing it?”

“Oh, you know…” Stede sniffs and waves his hand. “Everyone does from time to time.”

Ed shakes his head. “No, Stede. They don’t. That isn’t normal.”

“Well, I’m not fucking normal, am I? That’s the problem.”

Ed snorts. “I don’t want you to be normal. I love you for who you are. I wish you loved yourself the same way.”

Stede’s eyes well up with tears again and he sobs quietly, placing his hand on the one gripping his shoulder.

Ed pulls him in for a hug, and Stede buries his face in Ed's shoulder and shivers.

"You know now that there's no way I'm gonna let you do this, right? I'm not leaving this car."

“I… I know. ” Stede chokes with a whisper. “I texted you.”

“You did. You texted me and told me where to find you and you waited. That means something."

Stede sighs and holds on to Ed even tighter. “I think… I need a favor.”

“Anything. Anything at all, you name it, long as it involves me driving you out of here.”

“I think this is my last… I don’t have any other options.”

“Tell me what you need, man.”

“I need… help? I can’t stop thinking about it… You make me feel brave enough to… do something better. No one else cares.”

Ed feels tears running down his face. “That isn’t true, that’s your brain lying to you. There are a whole lot of people who care about you.”

“I don't want to get help for them, Ed. I know that’s bad, but I just want you."

“You have me, Stede. Always. You believe that, right?”

Stede pulls away and wipes his eyes. He gives an exhausted smile.

“I think so.” He bites his lower lip and looks out at the ocean. “I think… I think I need to go to a hospital.”

Ed processes this for a second and then nods.

“Yeah, that’s a good idea, mate. We’re gonna get you some help, okay?”

“Will you… will you come with me? Your bike…”

“Fuck the bike.” Ed gets out of the car and walks around to open Stede’s door. “Move over, I’m driving you.” He waves his hands in a “move” motion, because there is no way Ed is letting Stede out of the car until they are somewhere safe.

Stede awkwardly lifts his legs one at a time to move over the center console, and Ed slides into the driver’s seat, turning on the car’s child locks pointedly.

“Do you want to… listen to music?” Ed asks as he starts the car.

“No.” Stede shakes his head. “I don’t.” Ed squeezes Stede’s knee and begins to drive in silence. Stede rests his head against the passenger-side window and within minutes is asleep, leaving Ed to drive silently with a mixture of terror at losing the best thing in his life and the relief at saving him, if only for now.

Chapter 27

[lilyy43]

midnight thoughts ☾

hey guys!! so this is my first drabble im publishing here, i hope u like it and tell me what u think and what would u like to read next!

have a lovely day \(˵ˆ ³ˆ˵)/

:･ﾟ✧:･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧:･.::･ﾟ✧:･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧:･.::･ﾟ✧:･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧:･.::･ﾟ✧:･.☽˚｡･ﾟ✧:･.:

i closed the door to my house as quietly as possible, trying to not wake anyone up. then i walk down the same familiar path i choose to go through almost every night.

right, forward, old house, miss Green, mister Smith, playground, preschool, blue house, and finally, the small lake that opens the park.

i walk into the park, looking down at my dirty converse shoes. they've seen it all, i think. i see my favourite bench under the big tree that's making an umbrella with it's large branches covered with leaves. i sit down and bring my feet up to the bench, pulling ma legs into my chest and hugging my knees. 

as i am drifting away as always, looking at the dark lake glistening slightly from the moonlight, i hear footsteps. i look that way and i see a dark human posture coming my way. my heart skips a beat and i instinctivly get nervous. i have never encountered anyone during my night trips, so this seems dangerous. i'm alone in an empty park, a girl, with nothing with me besides the keys to my house. congratufuckinglations.

but it's too late to do anything right now, the person is already a few steps away from me. if i'm about to die right now, i will die. 

the mysterious man sits on the other end of the bench. as i look closer, i can see that it's a boy. he looks in fact young, maybe even my age. that calms my nerves a little bit. he doesn't say anything, just looks at the water in a similar way to me.

i'd gladly come back to watching the lake but i can't take my eyes off of him. he's mesmerizing. he's wearing baggy black cargo pants and a big black hoodie, with the hood thrown over his head. when i bring my eyes down, i see him wearing the same converse shoes as me, also looking like they've been through a lot. i can see the side of his face, his sharp jawline, smooth skin glistening in the moonlight, perfect nose and those shimmering dark eyes. he seems relaxed, like he doesn't care. even a tiniest little smile hanging on his lips.

he must have felt my gaze on him, beacuse he turned his head towards me. he doesn't say anything. then he reaches his hand out, as if he's offering me to take it. at first i think he's mad, what is he thinking? that he can just come up to a girl in the middle of the night and ask her to take his hand? 

but all my curses towards him disappear, when i take his hand. he pulls me gently closer to him, so that we're sitting side to side, knees touching. i feel weirdly at peace. all the anxiety that i came here with going away when i rest my head on his shoulder. 

i start staring at the lake again, this time more calmly, not so aggressively. he stares at the water too, i think. and we stay like that, until i push myself closer to him and wrap my hands around him and i feel him embrace me back. i hear every noise going down, feeling completely relaxed, my body letting loose as i melt into him. i feel myself falling fast asleep.

the next thing i remember is waking up on the bench, although not exactly the same as i fell asleep. im sitting on it, just leaning on the side of the metal arm. it's already day, something about noon, the sun is at it's highest and it's hurting my eyes. it's really warm and i hear kids laughing and people talking. everyone is acting normal, doing some daily activities. some people walk past me with their dogs, other with bags from the grocery store. some sit on the grass and talk or read books. other dogs are swimming in the lake chasing the ducks. and i just sit there, watching the water again, now glistening from the sunlight.

and then it hits me. the boy. where is he?

i look further across the lake, there is a bench, exactly the same as mine, just on the other side, like a mirror reflection.

but it's covered in shadow, when mine is shining in the sun.

[hotch-stufff]

can i get angst 47 with gibbs 👁👁

Bruises

gif is not mine

Paring: Gibbs x Reader

Warnings!: mentions of abuse, angst, crying, comforting, abusive relationship, cursing, mentions of injuries from abuse

Prompt: "You flinched"

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I laid on the ground, not having enough energy to stand up. I couldn't move, and God did it hurt to breathe. Probably a bruised rib, would definitely have some bruises to add to the collection.

Hopefully nothing bad enough to send me to the hospital. The last time I did that, well it was just really bad, and Darren was pissed. So pissed that when we got home, he beat me all over again.

Now I know what you're thinking. What is a federal agent doing staying in an abusive relationship like this? Truth is, I had no idea. At first it was because I thought the beatings would eventually stop, but they didn't. And after realizing they would never stop, I tried to get out. But that only left to another hospital trip and threats. The threats were the only reason that I stayed.

Darren threatened a lot of things. He threatened to beat me so bad I couldn't move. To kill me. But the worst was that he threatened to hurt my team. He knew the whole team, he knew them really well. He worked at NCIS for God's sake, just not on Gibbs team. And that was enough for me to stick around.

Of course, it should be known that it wasn't always like this. Darren was a good guy in the beginning. He brought me flowers and took me out to nice restaurants. He made time for me, and I did the same for him. But then, he didn't get the open spot on Gibbs team. I did. And it all went downhill from there.

The bruises were getting extremely hard to hide. Turtlenecks and long pants were becoming my everyday wardrobe. Which wasnt the easiest thing to work in, but foundation was expensive, and Darren spent most of our money on alcohol or cigarettes. Whatever his weekly fix was. It was ... exhausting. The front I had put up in front of everyone was tearing me down, and people were starting to notice.

Tony and Ziva, who sat closest to me would send me a concerned glance each time I winced when moving. I blamed it on muscle pain, from working out so much.

Abby would see the amount of makeup I was wearing and would ask if I was okay. Of course she just thought I was insecure. She would always tell me that I was bueatiful and that I didn't need makeup. It warmed my heart each and every time she said it.

Palmer was concerned because he had caught one of my bruises. It was on my wrist and my sleeve had rolled up slightly. He had asked about it and I had told him the first lie that popped in my head. That I had fallen. He had taken me straight to Ducky to make sure that it was actually okay. Which is how Ducky got involved.

And then there was Gibbs. Gibbs didn't ask questions, he didn't push for answers, he didn't send me concerned glances. But I was certain he knew something. He didn't know what was actually going on, because he would beat the shit out of Darren if he knew. But he just seemed like he knew something. I knew that if I was going to go to anyone about my "issue", it would be him. Gibbs had been there for me since I had joined the team. And we both had spent plenty of late nights in the office talking. Me, avoiding going home to Darren and him not wanting to go back to his empty house.

Everyone had said that Gibbs was this hard man that never opened up and remained silent most of the time. But boy once he got talking, he never shut up. We talked about eveything. And sometimes nothing, just enjoying each others presence. And if I'm honest, I may have been developing feelings for the guy. But I could never do that, because Darren would probably kill him. And that scared me more than anything.

But life seemed okay. Atleast I was the only one getting hurt.

Of course until it all came crashing down. And it had just been a normal day.

* * *

I sat at my desk, working on and endless stack of paperwork that came with each case. We had just wrapped one up, a good ending thankfully. The team was in high spirits, talking about going out to a bar tonight. But I knew Darren wouldn't have it. I had turned down the offer, instead opting to sit and do paperwork until I had to go home.

Everyone had left for the night, leaving me alone in the bullpen. My hand was a scribbling away, when I had felt the gentle tap of a hand against my shoulder. I should have been more careful, but I had thought it was Darren. So I flinched away from him and crossed my arms in front of my face.

"Y/n?" Gibbs. It was Gibbs. That was it. Just Gibbs. I instantly pulled my arms down and straightened up.

"H-hey Gibbs. What um, what can I do for you." He just stared at me, giving me the usual Gibbs glare.

"You flinched." I grimaced. Of course I did. I didn't want him to find out like this, but I guess this is how its gonna go.

"Um- I, I. Well you see Gibbs-" he cut me off.

"Is someone hittin ya?" He paused thinking, before remembering my oh so lovely boyfriend. "That son of a bitch."

"Wait Gibbs. Its not what you think." But the damage was done. He was going through everything in his mind. My clothes, the grimaces everytime I jerked around, the excuses, the late nights avoiding going home. It all made sense to him now.

"Take off your shirt." My eyes grew wide.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me." There was no avoiding this, he wasn't letting me off easily. I took a deep breath before grabbing the bottom of my turtleneck and bringing it over my head. His breath hitched when he saw the bruises that littered my skin.

"My god y/n." He shook his head, running the rough pads of his fingers up and down my arms. "Gonna kill him." And he stood back up, turning quickly before stomping towards the elevator. I slipped my shirt back on and ran after him, but he was already gone. I hurried down to the parking garage and jumped in my car speeding off.

He was gonna kill him. Although who would kill who, I didn't know.

I broke just about every speeding law on the way to my house. When I got there, the door was kicked open and yelling was coming from inside the house.

"Gibbs!" I shouted, running as fast as I could. I walked in the door and gasped. There was glass littering the floor, and picture frames scattered across the ground. I walked further in the house and found them in my kitchen. Gibbs on top of Darren, repeatedly punching him in the face.

"Gibbs! Stop!" I ran to him, pulling him off of Darren. "Stop, he isn't worth it." I pulled Gibbs up by his arm and dragged him away. But he wasn't finished.

"Ya ever go near her again, you're gonna wish you were dead. We'll come back for her stuff, you better not be here when we do." I wanted to cry, to scream, to shout. But I held it in, grabbing Gibbs more forcefully and dragging him back outside.

Once outside, we hopped in his car, and he began driving back to his house. Saying I was grateful was an understatement. Grateful that it was finally over. That maybe I could sleep at night now without worrying about waking up to another beating.

The ride was driven in silence, and soon we were at his house. He got out of the car and walked inside, leaving me out here by myslef. I walked in after him.

I found him in the the kitchen pouring a glass of Bourbon. I came up behind him hugging him.

"Thank you." He froze for a minute before turning in my grasp and brining me into a tight hug. And thats what started the tears. We stood there as I cried into his chest for what felt like forever. Until he finally pulled away and cupped my face.

"Ya didn't deserve any of that. Don't know what happened, or when it started. But ya didn't deserve any of it. You are beautiful and loved and noone should ever have to be treated the way you were." He paused and I began rambling out whatever words came to my mind.

"It was you. I stayed because he threatened you. He said he would hurt you and the team and I couldn't let him." He leaned his forehead against mine. The tears pouring steadily down my face, sobs racking by body.

"Shh, shh. Sweetheart its okay." He leaned in slightly, our lips brushing slightly. And then he leaned in the rest of the way, kissing me into he most gentle way he could. So much different than the bruising kisses that Darren would give me. He broke away after a second.

"Dont know if your ready for it, but I love ya." He said softly. "We can do this, if you want. At your own pace. I just want to show you whats its like to be loved the right way." I nodded.

"I might need some time. But I love you too... Jethro." He smiled.

"Take all the time you need. But m'not leaving your side." I giggled softly as he brought me into another hug. And I stood there whispering thank yous and I love yous until we headed off to bed. I hadn't felt this safe in a long time, and I never wanted to let this feeling go.

-------------

Hope you guys enjoyed this one. I'm really enjoying writing for Gibbs. Thanks for reading! Requests are still open, so ask away! Im so sorry if I don't get to your request! If you would like an idea of what to request, here is my prompt list, and if you would like to read more of my work, here is my masterlist.

[reidsnose]

sticky notes (spencer reid x reader) (platonic!baux reader)

overview: reader leaves and recieves a passive aggressive sticky note before going on a case

genre: fluff and humor?

a/n: i thought of this last night while i was trying to go to sleep and i could not stop thinking about that one vine and its also super snowy where i live lol. anyway i wrote it today throughout the school day and couldnt wait to put it on here :)

-

masterlist

-

'whoever used the last sugar packet, your moms a hoe.'

you let out a small chuckle and stuck the sticky not to the container that usually held packets of sugar before taking a sip of your bitter, unsweetened coffee that you would have to deal with for the rest of the day.

"i hope hotch didn't take it," prentiss laughed, peering over at the note.

"everyone knows hotch drinks his coffee black." you retorted.

"no only you know that because you were his assistant before you joined the team," she joked, resulting in you sending a light elbow to her side. "you know we are handwriting analysts. everyones going to know you wrote that."

"except that they wont because i type everything. besides, i dont really think anyone on the team wont take the joke." you chuckled, pushing the door open with your free hand and heading into the bullpen.

"briefing room in 5 minutes, we have a case," hotch called from the balcony.

"theres fresh coffee in the break room, i feel like were going to need it," you said to the rest of the team that were sitting at there desks.

they all eagerly got up, ready for a fresh, hot drink to wake them up. you smiled as you walked to the briefing room, standing by your unassigned assigned seat. you took a sip of your drink, making a face at the bitter taste.

"why is your beautiful face scrunched up?" Garcia asked, setting down files in front of all the empty seats.

"someone took the last sugar." you stated simply.

"i have some in the batcave, youre always welcome" she winked, sending you a warm smile which you gladly returned.

"youre the best."

"yeah i know," she answered before the other agents began filing in, Spencer taking a seat next to you. "alright crime fighters, today youre all headed to snowy Alaska."

"actually," rossi looked at hotch and then garcia before continuing, "Garcia i think youre coming too."

"sir?" she looked over at hotch.

"dave is right. the connection will be spotty anyway, it would be best if you came a long and worked from the precinct." hotch confirmed.

"oh. alright." she obliged before continuing with the details of the case.

(a/n: im waaayyyy too lazy to write a whole case)

"wheels up in 5, it will take a while to get there and we dont have time to waste." hotch said at the end of the briefing before walking out.

"oh shoot i left my phone in the break room," i whispered, smacking my forehead with my palm.

"do you want me to wait for you?" spencer offered.

"no its ok," you smiled, jogging down the stairs.

"ill take your go bag. hurry i dont know if i can convince them not to leave without you!" he called after me, a giggle escaping his throat at his own joke.

"thanks! it'll be their loss anyway!" you laughed, as you sped walked to the break room. "there you are." you whispered to your phone that was sitting on the counter.

your eyes drifted to the note you had left earlier only it was gone. a new note sat in its place, a reply scrawled on it.

'ill have you know my mother is a very nice lady'

you smiled and rolled your eyes, slipping the note into your pocket as you walked briskly towards the jet. you walked out and saw reid waiting for you at the door of the jet, motioning frantically for you to board. you had taken a little too long looking at the note.

"10 more seconds before you're officially late!" he yelled, looking at his watch.

you broke out into a sprint, running as fast as you possibly could, trying to get across the runway in time.

"dont leave without me!" you yelled out, knowing they wouldn't.

you looked at the windows, seeing the team's faces pressed against the glass, watching amused.

"5 seconds!" he warned as you neared the stairs. "3..." almost there! "2..." just a few more steps. "1!" his arms shot up as you pushed past him into the jet, just in the nick of time.

"wow im impressed pretty lady!" morgan laughed, giving you a high-five which you exasperatedly accepted.

"have a seat y/l/n, we have a long flight." hotch said. you began thinking he was made at you but then you saw him trying to stifle a smile, "i dont think ive even seen you run like that in the field."

he held out his fist which you bumped with your own before flopping breathlessly down onto one of the chairs on the jet.

~time skip to the end of the case because i feel like it~

you walked out of the police department, watching your own breath swirl around the air in front of you.

"could you believe that detective?" jj scoffed walking with you towards the suvs in the parking lot.

"i know he was so...creepy." you agreed, "if i smelled his coffee breath one more time id take his tiny d-"

you didnt get to finish your sentence, though; you felt a cold snowball bash against the back of your head.

"gotta go!" jj laughed, hopping into one of the last suvs and driving off.

"whoever threw that snowball, your moms a hoe!" you yelled out crouching down to gather some snow.

"what?" spencer yelled, emerging from behind a trashcan.

"IT WAS YOU!" you laughed, throwing a snowball and hitting him straight in the chest.

"wait no. what did you just say?" he asked, eyes wide.

"i said whoever threw that snowball, your moms a hoe." you stated, suddenly feeling bad, "but not your mom, diana is-"

"a very nice lady." he finished, reaching into his pocket and fishing out a crumpled little paper.

"oh my gosh," you breathed, pulling out a note from your own pocket.

"i had a feeling it was you!" he laughed.

you raised your eyebrows, "yeah right! you had no clue!"

"i totally did! i was like, 'hmmm who in the office talks like this? oh yeah my idiot best friend'." he countered, smirking.

"well i had a feeling it was you too!" you lied, crossing your arms.

"youre lying!" he laughed.

"no im not!"

"yes you are! you have a tell!"

"i do?!"

"yes! you purse your-" he swiftly reached to the floor and picked up a small amount of snow, wiping it across your mouth, "-lips."

the cool snow melted quickly on your now very warm face, causing you to instinctively wipe your it with your sleeve, "oh its on!"

snowballs were flying left and right in the nearly empty parking lot, seeking refuge all over your bodies. you watched him sneakily duck behind a trashcan, thinking you hadn't seen him. letting out a small chuckle you creeped towards the trashcan, standing behind him as he peered his head around the other side, looking for where you had gone. you took a small amout of snow and reached your arm around his head, wiping it against his mouth as he had. he jumped letting out a small scream before turning around and latching his arms around your waist.

he picked you up and spun you around, loosing his footing on the slippery, causing a strange mix of a laugh and a scream to escape your mouth. he fell back on a fresh layer of snow, with a dull thump. you fell directly on top of him, your foggy breaths melding together as your laughs started fading. his eyes flickered from your eyes down to your lips, a new rouge gracing his cheeks and nose, one that would be there regardless of the cold.

"ca-can i kiss you?" he asked, looking back up at your eyes.

"please." you smiled, heart close to bursting out of your chest as he closed the gap between you.

[megalony]

Like father, Like son

This is my first Henry Cavill imagine that is hopefully going to be a series, I hope you will all enjoy it, feedback is always lovely to have.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogmeddows @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction @ambi-and-sunflowers @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @hellsdragon @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg @allauraleigh @onceuponadetectivedemigod @ceres27​

Masterlist

Series masterlist

Summary: Henry and (Y/n) have five children together meaning their lives are always busy and complicated. But their family is tested when their eldest son decides to take his anger out on (Y/n).

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Look, your dad's home now and you know he'll say the same thing as me."

(Y/n)'s voice was as calm as ever and her tone sounded like music to Henry's ears the moment he walked through the door to their home. A smile formed on his lips as he kicked off his shoes, following his eldest boy through the hallway and down into the kitchen at the back of the house.

It always made Henry's heart jump when he came home to his family, to a full house bustling with noise and life and laughter and a lot of the time, arguing and squabbles.

When he walked into the kitchen, the same lopsided, bright smile shone through the room as he looked around at his family. This was the sight that Henry always wanted to see and it was the sight he lived for when he came home from work, from the shops or from taking any of the kids out. It was the sight of his wife and kids, reminding him of just how lucky he had become by having them all.

He rested his hands on Charlie's shoulders who had been out with him this morning and his eyes flitted round to check the rest of his kids were all present and accounted for.

Henry saw Harvey sat at the kitchen table, his head resting on his right hand as he swirled his fork around his plate aimlessly in a way that told Henry the eight-year-old was refusing to eat again. Next to him was Peter sat with an empty plate and a colouring book beside him. And running over to him was Angel with her arms open wide ready to embrace her daddy.

Both Henry and Charlie had left early this morning to go to the gym, it was something that they were recently doing together since Charlie was taking a big interest in training and doing it with his dad made him smile and gave them both something to bond over. That meant that they left when Angel was still asleep and whenever Henry left before seeing her in the morning, he knew when he came home she would demand cuddles from him until she was satisfied.

"Daddy!" The four-year-old bypassed round her eldest brother, barely sparing him a glance as her big brown doe eyes were completely locked on Henry. Her arms stretched up towards him and she bounced on the tip of her toes to try and signal what she wanted.

A small whine left her lips as she clawed at Henry's gym shorts until he finally relented and gave her what she wanted, bending down to scoop her up in his arms as Charlie moved to sit at the table.

"There's my Angel, you okay?" Henry pressed a kiss to her cheek, then her nose and then her other cheek just to hear her giggle and squirm in his arms before she circled her arms around his neck so she could kiss his cheek in return. It was no secret to anyone that Angel was a daddy's girl and it made their bond even more special since out of all five kids, Angel was the only girl Henry and (Y/n) had.

"Hmm, mummy said we can go for a walk, a-and to the park... a-and it's movie night tonight!"

Being the toddler she was, Angel had a thing about saying whatever was on her mind and it took a lot of concentration to properly understand every sentence that came past her lips at the speed of light.

"Yep, we'll go out after we've all had dinner Angel." Henry pressed another kiss to her cheek before he set her down to her feet, smiling as she begrudgingly let him go and went back to sit down at the table.

When Henry's head turned to the left, the smile on his lips changed to an even sweeter one and he bit down on his lower lip to stop his smile fro spreading too widely across his features. The rowdy conversations and noises from the kids seemed to mute in his ears when his eyes focused on his wife. She was stood near the kitchen side making sandwiches with one hand and in her other arm rested Briar, their youngest child. The seven-month-old was settled on her hip, drooling on her shoulder as he was just about to doze off to sleep.

That was a sight that never got old in Henry's eyes.

"How've you been this morning?" Henry's words were quiet but he still made (Y/n) jump as she seemed to have been lost in her own world.

A smile tugged at her blushing pink lips when she felt Henry's arms snake around her waist and his chest press up against her back, engulfing both her and Briar, smothering them from view of the rest of their kids. Her shoulder slightly pulled up and her head leaned to the right when Henry buried his face in the crook of her neck. His breaths tickling and fanning against her skin and every kiss pressed to her neck made shivers crawl under her skin.

"Briar's been fussy, Harvey won't eat his lunch and Angel's desperate to go out. But Peter's been fine."

(Y/n) didn't have to tell Henry how she had been, telling him about the kids always gave him a picture of her morning and how it had planned out for her but today hadn't been a bad day. They had fun days, mad days, off days, crazy days, days that were forgotten the moment they all went to sleep, But bad days weren't that common in their household.

"Well someone's starting to do my training exercises almost as good as me, and on boxing he's a natural."

Henry was in training for his new tv show he would be starting in two months' time and while he did spend most of his time in the gym, he thought that taking Charlie with him on the more laid back sessions would help them all. It got Charlie active and out of the house, it meant (Y/n) had one less child to watch and look after and it meant Henry got to spend some quality time with his eldest child.

Charlie's relationship with both his parents was a complicated one.

There was a close bond between them all because he was their first child, he was their first baby and that was something special to the couple. But despite how much Henry tried to be home and be with all the kids, he did work a lot and had to leave for weeks at a time for his job. That meant that (Y/n) was the parent that was always around and with five kids, she was a stay at home mum for the time being to care for them all.

Charlie had a mild case of autism but it was his anger issues that were the main problem. When he got angry he lashed out and with (Y/n) being at home all the time and his main parent to be around, he took his anger out on her. When he was younger it was verbal, he would shout and scream at her or sometmes call her names and none of that phased (Y/n), she could handle his outbursts and episodes very well.

But as he got older, he decided trying to hit or kick her was how he wanted to let his anger out. Doing that strained his relationship with Henry because Henry wouldn't stand for him doing that. He didn't have much of a temper, he was a laid back person but when Charlie hurt (Y/n) it pushed all the wrong buttons for him.

But days like today showed Henry just how close he still was to his eldest child. To be able to video them both doing the same training exercises, competing against each other and just generally enjoying working out together was exhilarating. It gave them a common ground and something they could do together and bond over.

For the last month Henry had taken Charlie with him to training and it had done them all the world of good.

"Wow, he's doing that good huh? Maybe it should be a regular thing, like an after-school activity or something." (Y/n) leaned her head back on Henry's shoulder, moving a plate over to the left signalling to him she had made him something to eat.

"Mum, do you want to see the videos we took? Dad's put some of them online." The enthusiasm in Charlie's voice made (Y/n)'s lips curve into a smile as she turned round in Henry's arms, smiling at Charlie when she saw the grin on his features.

A silent exchange happened between her and Henry, shifting the sleeping baby from her shoulder onto his own before both parents moved to sit with the rest of the kids at the table. (Y/n) placed a plate in front of Charlie before she leaned closer to him so he could show her the video he was so proud of. Henry liked posting little videos on his instagram and he and (Y/n) didn't see a problem with having any of the family in those videos, especially with the way his fans reacted so positively towards them all.

"What's up bud, the way it looks or the way it tastes?" Henry leaned over to his right to be closer to Harvey, wondering why he wasn't eating this time.

In the last year Harvey had started to decline food, he wasn't eating much and he had gotten rather skinny. Sometimes he said he just simply wasn't hungry and other times they could tell his mood made him less likely to eat. And when he was particularly unsettled he became very picky about what he would actually eat. But sitting with him and letting him take his time and encouraging him seemed to help him eat a bit better.

Henry took a bite of his sandwich before he adjusted Briar so he was laying on his lap, curled up against his abdomen instead of leaning on his shoulder. 

"Oi!" (Y/n) rolled her eyes as she hit Henry's arm for being so cheeky. There was nothing wrong with her food, she happened to be rather good at cooking and years of experience with all their fussy children meant she knew exactly the kind of things they would and wouldn't eat.

Harvey cracked a smile, looking up at Henry who pressed his lips together and rolled his eyes towards the ceiling to signal he was in trouble. Henry found that trying to make his son smile and giggle made him relax and then he was more likely to eat.

"I know your mum's not the best cook, but if you don't eat it she'll be offended and I'll get into trouble."

"You're walking on thin ice Cavill, if you don't like my cooking then don't eat it." (Y/n) rose her brows at Henry who simply winked in response before he looked back over to Harvey.

"Take your time bud, but just finish that half of the sandwich for me." Bargaining became a lot of the job with getting Harvey to eat. It was switching up foods at dinner so he would eat at least half his plate or offering him crisps or some sweets if he ate most of his food or even a few bites of food. Sometimes it was saying he could watch tv or they would go out if he managed to eat or else he wasn't motivated and simply wouldn't eat.

The next step with him would be to go to the doctor's and see if they could do anything to help him.

Harvey looked down at his sandwich before he looked back up at Henry and nodded to the bargain.

"Okay, I don't want you to get into trouble daddy." There was a slight joking tone to Harvey's voice and the smile on his lips matched Henry's cheeky smile perfectly. But both boys quickly lowered their heads when they caught sight of (Y/n)'s narrowed eyes and her head shaking in their direction.

They were getting themselves into trouble.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Charlie that's enough! If you can't play nicely then don't play at all." (Y/n)'s voice resonated through the play room, the figure and voice of authority to all three kids playing in there.

Charlie was in a mood because he couldn't go out and play with his friends and playing in with his siblings wasn't the same. They weren't his own age, Harvey was four years younger than Charlie, Peter was five years younger, he didn't want to play with Angel since she was only four and Briar was still a baby. He rowed with his siblings more than he actually played with them.

Walking up behind the sofa Charlie was slouched on, (Y/n) leaned over and took the Wii remote from his hand before turning and passing it down to Angel who was stood beside her. Angel wasn't the child who liked to tell on her siblings, she felt like she was doing something wrong but she did like when either (Y/n) or Henry came in and kept the peace because they made her brothers play fair with her.

She was only four and she couldn't play the Wii games properly but (Y/n) knew her daughter loved trying to play them but it irritated Charlie that she wasn't doing it properly. He was more skilled in all the games because he was older and he had decided if she wasn't going to play properly he would take the remote from her and play for her.

"Mum! I was so close to winning!"

"Angel was playing until you took the remote from her, let her play if she wants to don't take it off her."

"I was playing but you took it off me." Charlie snapped back before he folded his arms across his chest and slouched further down the dark chocolate sofa.

The play room was next to the conservatory near the back garden, it was a room with all the games consoles, a tv, lots of books and colouring for the kids and a sofa and a few cushions and bean bags. There were a few book quotes (Y/n) had painted onto the walls and pictures stuck up that the kids had drawn over the years. It was somewhere they could play other than in their rooms but they all knew if they played together they had to play nice and fair.

"Right Charlie get up. You're not staying in here if you're gonna be like that."

(Y/n) walked round to the front of the sofa and reached down, taking hold of Charlie's upper arm before she tugged him up from the sofa and to his feet. Angel and Peter were playing in here and if Charlie wanted to mess around he could do it somewhere else.

"I wanted to go to Adams! Dad said I could go." Charlie crossed his arms over his chest as if his argument was fair and stood up against (Y/n) but it didn't.

"Dad said yes until I told him this morning that Harvey is sick and Briar is teething. I can't drive you there and leave Harvey sick in bed so you have to stay because no one else can take you or pick you up. Don't argue with me Charlie because it won't work."

Harvey had been sick this morning and he hadn't stopped which meant (Y/n) couldn't even get him to eat anything. He was asleep in bed and (Y/n) couldn't leave him here on his own or get him into the car to take Charlie to his friend's house. Nor did she want to move Briar who was finally settled after being up most of the night because he was teething. Henry knew this and he agreed Charlie couldn't go but because he wasn't here to talk to him Charlie was getting agitated.

He didn't like plans changing or not being able to do something he wanted to and (Y/n) understood but at the same time, there was nothing she could do.

"That's not fair-"

"Charlie go and play football in the garden or go and play in your room or watch tv, I don't care what you do just don't be mean to your sister and don't argue with me. Now come on, out of here."

(Y/n) put her hand to Charlie's shoulder and tried to nudge him in the direction of the door but he flung his arms out at her and pulled away. The look on his face matched Henry's exactly when the actor was angry or portraying a deceitful character but it didn't enamour (Y/n) when Charlie did it.

(Y/n) tried again to get Charlie to move, knowing arguing in front of his siblings wasn't good nor fair but he kept flinging his arms back at her to get her off him.

"Charlie go to your room!"

"No. I want dad, I hate being left with you!"

Charlie wrestled his arms free from (Y/n) when she tried to pull him away from Peter and Angel but his spiteful words caused (Y/n) to falter for a brief moment. Her eyes locked with Charlie's the moment he got his right arm free from her and suddenly curled his hand into a fist before sending it straight into her upper stomach.

A gasp escaped (Y/n)'s lips that felt like all the air in her lungs had ben forced from her body that coiled in on itself. Charlie had hit her before but he had never punched her and he had never done it so powerfully like that before. He knew exactly what he was doing and exactly where to hit her to stun her and hurt her like that. Her upper body curled over and her arms retracted to wrap around her chest as she managed to steady herself on her feet before she stumbled down.

Charlie stood in front of (Y/n), taking ragged breaths with a look of rage in his eyes that was quickly dwindling when he realised what he had done.

"Mum-"

"Out." (Y/n) struggled to verbalise the word that she spoke with a tone of anger but Charlie could hear the pain in her cracked voice. He could see the tears brimming in her eyes and how her features were turning red from her lack of breath and the pain she was in.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Angel said he punched you, let me see."

"Henry it's okay-"

"(Y/n), show me." The sternness in Henry's voice added with the cold, burning rage in his eyes made (Y/n) want to cower away from her husband and wish this situation would just go away. Whenever Charlie tried to hit her or push her or even kick her, she would tell Henry what had happened and how his behaviours were getting out of control.

But this was the first time he had punched her and she didn't want to tell Henry because she knew his reaction would be a very bad one. He hated how Charlie took his anger out on (Y/n) but this was a new level and Charlie wasn't going to come out of it very well.

It hurt Henry more that the moment he came home a teary Angel had ran up to him and told him Charlie had scared her by punching (Y/n). He had to quickly calm down his daughter before finding his wife and the moment he told her what Angel had said, he knew it was true by the defeated yet worried look in (Y/n)'s eyes.

(Y/n) slowly pulled up her shirt, revealing the mark in the middle of her stomach near the bottom of her ribs that was turning into a very dark bruise. It had hurt more when it knocked the wind out of her chest, now it was a dull throb that (Y/n) could easily ignore.

But Henry couldn't.

He couldn't ignore the mark he was now seeing on his wife's skin, anyone daring to hurt her would face Henry's wrath but the fact that it was their own son that had hurt her made his skin crawl and his blood boil to the max.

(Y/n) watched the emotions pool in Henry's eyes and swirl around like a whirlpool but a bolt of fear shot through her when she saw Charlie appear in the living room out the corner of her eye. Either way she knew Henry would be arguing with their eldest son and having words with him about this but the fact hge just turned up now was worse because Henry's emotions were bubbling over.

The moment Henry turned his head and locked eyes with his son, Charlie wanted to run but he didn't have the chance before Henry advanced over to him.

Charlie's slender but tall frame jumped when he felt Henry's hand on the back of his neck, dragging him over to stand in front of (Y/n) who had no idea what words were going to fly out her husband's mouth.

"Look what you've done to your mother! What gave you the right to think you could punch her? Well?!" Henry shook his hand to try and get Charlie to speak but all that happened was the eldest boy started to silently cry. Tears drenched his cheeks and he shakily wiped his sleeve under his runny nose. He caught sight of (Y/n)'s bruise before she pulled down her shirt and it made him shiver. He didn't mean to actually hurt her, he lashed out in the moment and he regretted what he did immediately.

But that wasn't enough. He'd done it without even thinking what he was doing or the consequences of his actions. He couldn't go around hurting (Y/n) and Henry certainly couldn't have Charlie thinking he could dare to hurt any of his siblings either.

"You're grounded and you're not going back to that gym again. I won't have you learning to box just to come home and abuse your mum with it. Don't you ever lay a hand on her like that again, now get out of my sight."

Henry let go of Charlie before giving him a rough nudge in the direction of the door, knowing he wouldn't dare argue with him about this even though he was clearly distraught by his punishment.

Charlie loved the gym but Henry wasn't taking him anymore. He wasn't learning to lift weights, get his strength up and he was not learning to box if he was just going to come home and hurt (Y/n) with the skills he had. Henry wouldn't allow that to happen, Charlie was going to have to find another way to let his anger out and he would have to find another activity he enjoyed other than the gym. That couldn't be Charlie and Henry's activity to bond over anymore.

"Henry... the gym, he loved going with you." (Y/n)'s voice was quiet as she buried her face in his chest that was heaving from his laboured breaths. She wrapped her arms round his waist, feeling his arms engulfing her frame and his lips pressing to the top of her head.

"I know, but there's no way he is going back there after doing that to you. He has to stop."

Henry hated that he was the parent that was away at work, the one that was always rushing off or coming back early in the morning or late at night. He hated that he had to leave his family for long periods of time and miss their school events or milestones or just the little achievements they had. But more than that, he hated how (Y/n) was suffering because she was the parent they got mad with because she was always there and saw every good and bad mood they experienced.

He couldn't have Charlie being like that with her again.

[jeonfiles]

better left unsaid - jjk

genre: angst, rebounds

pairings: jungkook x reader (ft. namjoon)

warnings: arguing, alcohol, profanity, break ups, light smut, use of drugs, jungkook is a fucking dick, jungkook has major attachment issues, toxic relationships, oc cries a lot, namjoon has a heart of gold, unrequited love

synopsis: you knew you shouldnt have given him that second chance, not the third or the fourth either. no matter how much you try he always slithers his way underneath your sheets, arms wrapped around you.

word count: 2.7k

music: into your arms, so it ends?, you will fade, thinkin bout you, julia, my insecurities not yours, fuck u, goodluck, my dear i will think of you

note: uhh ive never written a y/n fic so bare with me, if u listen to the music you’ll be able to feel the story a lot more so yeah if u have time u should, not proof read

Light coming through the cracks of the blinds, making you squint your eyes when the daylight beams into your eyes, head resting on the kitchen island Looking up, you saw the clock ticking on the wall, 11:32 am.

You had stayed up till 5 am, waiting for him to come home, but seemingly, he never did. Reaching for your phone, you saw 4 missed calls from the one and only,

Jeon Jungkook, saved in your phone as “Koo <3″, Rows of messages too, all from the same contact.

Koo <3 [05:34 am]

baby pkck me up pleseee

im so wsated

Koo <3 [06.46am]

dont be mad at me jsut pick me up

i dont knw hewere the fuck i am

i love you

Koo <3 [07:31 am]

i got a rde home i’ll be home by 12

i need to talk to someone frsit

im sorry if i woke ypu dont be worried

You took a few moments to collect your thoughts, but there wasn’t much to collect. This whole thing, was a routine by now.

Standing up to make yourself a cup of coffee, you could literally not feel your own backside, you were so sore from the barstool you had been sitting on all night, and it made you groan in pain.

Two coffee cups right beside the kitchen sink, which you couldn’t bring yourself to clean up, because it was from the last time you had coffee together, which was 2 weeks ago.

The inside of the cup had a coffee crust at the top, and both your lip tint marks on the outside.

When you finish your cup of coffee while watching a bad telenovela, you go sit in your favorite chair and pull out a few books from the backpack hanging on the chair next to you, getting ready to get some studying done.

For a few seconds you imagine Jungkook hanging over your shoulder laughing at the way you write your A-s and R-s, or the way you always sign your homework at the bottom of the page.

And when you open them, there’s no one there. The only sound is from the refrigerator, making refrigerator noises.

You had met Jungkook 3 years ago, when you were at college orientation, senior year of high school. He also wanted to attend Yonsei, just like you.

And when he whispered to you about how bored he was, you couldn’t help but giggle, and then you got yelled at.

It was worth it though, because everyone was jealous of you afterwards,the  Jeon Jungkook had talked to you.

Jungkook was an all-rounder as they called it; great physique, intelligent, charismatic and great at sports.

And god, he had a beautiful face, and such a filthy mouth, and it didn’t go long before you gave in to his seductive ways and slept with him. The morning after, he wasn’t in bed with you, and your heart sank.

Luckily, he was in the kitchen making you breakfast.

It was all bliss from there, showering you with love, gifts and kisses for two years, and you even ended up moving in together.

And now? You barely remember what he sounds like, smells like and is like.

A distant memory, just as distant as him.

Your train of thought was suddenly interrupted as you heard 3 knocks on your door. The exact same way he had always knocked when he had forgotten (or lost) his keys.

And even though you should have let him suffer a little, you rushed to the door to open it, and in front of you, was your biggest nightmare.

It was your love, crying his eyes out, bleeding from one of many cuts on his face, looking nearly dead. He collapsed into your arms, and you could only utter a few words, along the lines of:

“How could you do this to us?”

As he was laying curled up in a ball on the couch, face plastered up, ice bag on his knee, wrapped up in a blanket, you realized. this was your que to cry.

So, you did. You cried in silence, sitting across the room from him. You weren’t mad at him for coming home late, or getting in another fight, probably the 5th just these past months, you had gotten used to that by now.

There was a whole other reason that made you cry.

He smelled like Victorias Secret Bombshell, you recognized the scent because it used to be your favorite,  however, now you’ve moved onto something less sweet, and more elegant, like Caroline Herrera.

He smelled like someone who wasn’t you, his girlfriend.

He smelled like another girl.

It didn’t hurt as much as you thought it would. Maybe because the Jungkook that had come home to you that morning wasn’t your Jungkook.

Your Jungkook was varsity jackets, star of the american football team (which your school was known for), selfless and humorous, and he would always take care of you.

Your Jungkook was not ungroomed hair, cigarettes and worsening grades. He was not cold and lifeless, and he would never make you cry.

Despite this, you were carding your fingers though his hair, thumb wiping away the blood on his lips while he was sound asleep as you slowly fell asleep next to him.

Maybe it was time to let him go. 

Maybe.

You woke a few hours later from your phone vibrating.

Kim Namjoon (school) [07:01 pm]

Hey Y/N! Have you started working on the statistics assignment?

If you haven’t, would you be interested in meeting at the library tomorrow? You’re really smart and i’m kinda struggling ://

You [07:03 pm]

i finished it yesterday, but if you buy me coffee i’ll come help you hehe

Kim Namjoon (school) [07:04 pm]

You’re the best, I’ll bring you a machiatto!! :D

Maybe it would be nice for you to get out of the house, even though you hate the thought of it, and you would much rather just swim in your own sorrow.

But you did go out the next day, and you helped Namjoon get a decent grade, enough to pass with good margines, he thanked you by taking you out for ramen at a convenial store not too far away.

You thanked him for the ramen with a trip to the museum, and he thanked you for the museum trip with a picnic in the park at night, which led you to crying over Jungkook in his embrace, telling him every single little detail.

He made you realize it was time to let Jungkook go and make room for new people to enter your life.

You went home that night, and you found Jungkook passed out on the couch, and you could genuienly feel your chest tighten. Soft features which stood out under the moonlight glow, disheveled brown locks which hung down in his eyes.

He was gorgeous, until you saw the credit card on the table next to three bottles of soju and an empty beer can on the floor. And you knew what he had used the credit card for, though you didn’t want to say it out loud.

You cleaned everything up, and you threw the residue of the white powder right in the trash can, and you recycled his bottles and cans before finally, nudging him to wake up.

“Jungkook, wake up.” You spat coldly, or at least you attempted to.

He groaned, rubbing his eyes before opening his eyes, and s huge smile on his face. “Y/N, you’re home!” He reached to kiss you, but you backed away.

“Y/N?” Jungkook questioned, he didn’t quite understand what your intentions were.

“Don’t try anything Jungkook. This was your last chance, and you fucked it up, again.” The room turned ice cold. “I’m getting you help Jungkook, you need help. And then...”

He understood what kind of help you meant, and since he had now sobered up, he agreed, nodding. “And then...?” 

“And then.” Your words were ludged in your throat. “And then I’m leaving you.”

His whole face dropped, smile turned into the frowniest frown you had ever seen, and it was all silent before his lower lip starts trembling, and his eyes start turning glassy.

“It’s alright. Sorry for burdening you.” Was all he could say before tears rushed down his cheeks, and he started shaking.

So you did what you always had done, and you wrapped your arms around him, head resting on your chest as he sobbed.

“Is there anyone else?” he cried out before another wave of sobs hit him.

This exact question made your stomach hurt, and your throat burn. You really had no idea.

Or you did, but you didn’t want to.

You loved Jungkook so much, but you couldn’t be with him in this state. So you did what every rational person would do in this situation.

“Yeah.”

You lied.

“Oh ok. I don’t have the right to be mad do I?”

You shake your head no.

“I love you Y/N. I’m sorry I’m so messed up.”

“It’s ok.” was all he said before he fell asleep in your arms again.

That night you slither your way out of his embrace and you pack your suitcase in the dark, bringing all your essentials, trying to be as quiet as possible so you didn’t wake Jungkook.

Packing enough for two weeks or so, you make the bed and leave your t-shirt “accidentally” in the bathroom, and you make sure all his clothes are folded, and then you sort his pencil case, throwing out old pens and worn out erasers.

You leave a grocery list on the counter, and you tuck him in good under the blankets after you took his jeans and socks off so he could sleep comfortably.

You placed his vitamins and medicine by the refrigerator so he’ll see it when he goes to grab something to eat. 

Puffed up pillows, a pair of sweatpants, t-shirt and underwear is now placed neatly on his bed. Then you walk into the kitchen again, and you see Jungkook still sound asleep, sniffling a little still.

There’s one last thing, and it makes you cry. It makes you sob so loud you cover your mouth and muffle the sound you make. Sinking to the floor, your whole body is in contact with the cold tiles.

Only a year ago you could never imagine yourself even shedding a single tear over something as small as this, but here you were, on the edge of a panic attack.

Two worn out, matching couple mugs still placed by the counter. one if the first things you two had bought together, as well as the necklace hanging around your neck.

Finally, you stopped crying and started cleaning the mugs, lip trembling as you dried them and placed them in the back of the cabinet.

You unhooked your necklace and laid it down on the counter, and the biggest lump formed in your throat.

Actually, there’s a little detail you forget. 

You kiss Jungkook on the forehead and leave a note on the coffee table.

“Dear Jungkook,

If you want to make this up to me (this does not mean a new chance!!) you call the number at the bottom of the page. No matter what happens, I’ll always have room for you in my heart. You even have your own little VIP lobby in there. And - if it’s urgent, call. I still care for you, and I always have. You were the best boyfriend I’ve had, but good things always come to and end, don’t they? Anyways, I’m tired so this letter fucking sucks, but deep down you know how much I love you. Remember to get groceries, shower, get fresh air and study. If I forgot something you can keep it, as long as you call the number and tell them you’re my friend. They’ll help you love. Try and get a part time job too, your student loan and your dad’s money won’t last forever. Good luck Koo. Hwaiting!!

-L/N Y/N <33″

You cringe when you think of the letter’s contents, before you roll out your suitcase out of the front door, whispering a faint “Goodnight Love.” as you close and lock the door behind you.

Standing by the elevator, you cry again. This time, louder, but you still reach for your phone and type out a text to the newly edited contact in your phone.

You [02:13 am]

coming outside now, im a crying mess and im super cold, is your car heated?

sorry for making you wait btw :((

Joonie <3 [02:13 am]

dont worry about the crying part, i’ll hold you. and yeah car is heated, so waiting here wasnt all that bad. you ready for this?

You  [02:14 am]

i have no idea but i cant stay here any longer and i trust you sooo

lets start our new chapter. eh?

4 months later...

He had been good to you, great even.

You had been on expensive dates, picnics, had heart to heart conversations, and he’d been so understanding.

Today, it was your 2 month anniversary, and he had asked you on a magnificent date, which he had planned every second of.

At the end of the day, you told him how you don’t love him. He said it was alright. Namjoon loved you, so much, yet he understood you needed time.

You went to sleep that day, warm in Namjoon’s embrace, wondering how Jungkook was doing. 

You felt bad, but you missed Jungkook.

You were both with someone new now, and you knew he was in good hands with someone stable enough to care for him.

Before your eyes closed shut, you shed a few quiet tears and hoped that you’d fall in love with Namjoon soon, and deep down you knew you would.

[raebayhc]

Girls Night Out

PART TWO!!!

warnings: smut, oral sex (f), fingering, public sex acts, car sex, use of alcohol, manipulation

word count: 2070

summary: you along with your groups of friends decide to have a girls' night for the first time in a while, things get heated and your friends end up taking turns using your body.

series: part 1 (more parts to come)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Finally making your way through the crowd you make it back to the group of girls who had already begun to drink. Mikasa’s hand finds purchase on your waist as she pulls you closer to hand you a drink “it’s fruity, you’ll like it” Mikasa knew you weren’t a heavy drinker but when you did drink you preferred fruitier things, you giggled at the thought of her ordering something so girly with the sole intent on giving it to you. You happily took the drink from her hand giving her a warm smile, taking a sip she watches your reaction as your face lights up “holy shit mik- this is awesome” she takes a sip of her rich colored drink “let me taste” you obliged as you held your glass up for her, she goes to hand you her drink but you decline “no thanks, that stuff tastes like rat poison.. I’m better off with my drink from paradise” you laugh, she lets out a small chuckle at your cuteness “just try it y/n I promise it’s not that bad”.. “Ughhhhhh fiiiiiine only because it’s you mik” you reply hesitantly. You both lift your drinks to the mouth of the other, not breaking eye contact you take a sip, and as does she, almost as if it was planned yall both swallow squint grunt then let out a small cough a visual representation of how yall felt about each other’s drinks “how do you drink this shit?? Bleh” Mikasa spits out “it’s better than the jet fuel you have in this glass” you shiver out.

The night goes on and all of the ladies are around the bar talking, yall somehow landed on your childhood and how yall used to run around outside all day and play in the woods behind your neighborhood. Mikasa continues to tell the story of how yall have matching scars on the same place at the top of your inner thigh from when yall collided bikes one time as if she needed proof she lifted your skirt to look at the scar, a reminder maybe, “see! Told yall it really happened and I have the same exact one too!” she lets your skirt back down and the girls disperse throughout the building, some dancing, some talking to guys for potential hookups. You and mik still at the bar talking. She cuts your sentence short “wait actually let me see your scar again I think it shrunk” without getting confirmation from you she lifts your skirt and underestimating the length it would take for her to reach the scar she overshot and instead of rubbing the scar she rubs the thigh right against one of your folds, a small whimper falls out of your throat, you didn’t mean to let it out it just kind of happened. Your stomach drops, her eyes dart up to your face, a deep blush forming that you can’t control. She cocks an eyebrow at you and slowly begins to move her hand up closer and closer to your sex, your grip on the bar counter becoming tighter “mik what the fuck are you doing” you spit out through gritted teeth. “I haven’t stopped thinking about earlier… yah know when we basically kissed in the theatre, I haven’t gotten you out of my mind since.” her words lit a flame in you, not only because of how seductive they were but because you were definitely attracted to her, you always have been but you would never dare to speak on it.

“I’ve kept this to myself for far too long don’t you think?” she asks, not able to push out any words fearing you would instead release a moan you nod, your eyebrows scrunched on your forehead, your bottom lip tucked between your teeth, eyes glossy, nipples erect and visible through your thin shirt….. She couldn’t help herself. Slipping a finger into your underwear she groans at how wet you already are “all this… for me baby?” she purrs into your ear. “Mik…. we’re at a bar, there are people everywhere… please..” you whine out, she replies with a simple “trust me”, grabbing your jaw and forcing you to face her she grabs her drink opens your mouth and pours it in “spit it out or swallow it and you’ll regret it” you wince and nod your head obediently “good girl” she purrs.

Now basically crumbling under her touch your thighs are shaky, breathing erratic as you can only breath through your nose due to the rich liquid sheltered in your mouth. She positions her fingers to shape a gun, she then points her ‘hand gun’ at you and ‘pulls the trigger’ taking that same position she pushes into you, knowing you would react to this she lets out a loud cough to cover your moan, thank goodness she did. You’re vocal she likes that. Now pushing in and out of you she takes her left hand and grabs your neck then pulls you to kiss, her tongue prodding at your lips signaling you to open for her, the deep liquid flows into her mouth dripping down your chins, she swallows the liquid but remains in contact with your face against her occasionally biting or sucking on your lip. You knew there were definitely going to be marks later but you didn’t care, this was pure bliss and just the thought of Mikasa getting aroused by this was enough to send you over the edge, your vision gone blurry, your body shaking, reaching your climax. You droop your head down breathing heavy, worried she had crossed a line Mikasa lifted your head only to see a blissful fucked out expression, eyes hazy, drool falling down your chin, your mouth in a slight smirk, tears threatening to fall. “Oh, shit” she mumbles now fully aware of the effect you have on her.

Removing her fingers from under your skirt she dips her fingers in your drinks and encourages you to take them in your mouth which you do without a fight, a low groan escapes your lips as you taste the sweet and salty mixture of your juices, her sweat, and your ‘drink from paradise’ on her digits. Pulling her fingers out with a loud ‘pop’ she pulls a napkin from under her drink and wipes them off. Still recovering from the previous climax you sit there catching your breath, Mikasa’s hand finds its way to the small of your back, she leans into your neck giving you small pecks then comes up to your ear and nibbles on it a bit “.... y’know… there’s so much more I want to do to you.. Bee.” your skin shivers at the name she had given you when yall were in the sixth grade after you got chased by a bee into a creek, you hadn’t heard it in years… she really was something.

You only had one drink so you were nowhere near tipsy, sober as can be….. Unfortunately that cant be said for some of the other ladies. Ymir, Sasha, and Hitch were all out of it fortunately enough you, mikasa, and historia were all sober so yall could drive, you decide to take responsibility for hitch and drive her to the barn. You put her arm around your shoulder “shit. Why the fuck are you so heavy hitch, youre tiny” you spit out struggling to support her weight on you as you walk her to the car “h- hey-*hiccup* hey. Im not heavy I just had done a cartwheel sometimes earlier when she asked me to”. Yup. she’s out of if you think, you’re on the road and on the way to Sasha’s family barn when hitch yells at you to pull into an empty parking lot so she can get air a possibly throw up. Y’know the basic drunk shenanigans. You pull over to what seems to be a deserted parking lot with a raccoon and some dead bushes “okay hitch hurry up” “yeah yeah I’m going I’m going” she seems to have sobered up a bit.. *click* the passenger door opens and the car lights come on “hurry up they’re wai-” you’re cut off by the image in front of you. Wearing nothing but her underwear hitch had removed all of her clothing including her bra revealing her numerous piercings including a belly button and nipple piercings, not only that but she had one hand down her panties moving around doing what you assume is masturbating and her other hand squeezing her nipple “mmph please..please.. Help me will you pretty girl?” butterflies filled your stomach “what’re you-”

Hitch climbs halfway in with her hand on the middle console and one of her knees on the passenger seat, grabbing the collar of your shirt she pulls you in for a sloppy kiss, your grip on the wheel loosens as you lose yourself in the kiss, not only that but you notice she doesn’t taste of alcohol, not even the slightest bit. In fact, you remember about a month ago when she said she was gonna stop drinking and when yall were in the club you only saw her with cans of soda when you did happen to catch a peek of her.. Was she- “faking?” your thoughts cut off by her sudden comment “you know you’re really easy to read y/n, I can tell what’s going on in that pretty little brain of yours honey.” “so were you? Faking I mean.” you say in a confused tone as if you were trying to piece it all together yourself “yeahhhhh sorry but I had to get you alone somehow, don’t think I didn’t notice how Mikasa and historia were all over you tonight, it wasn’t rocket science to figure out they probably fucked you..and to be honest I’ve thought about us together. So please… have me?” she takes your hand and shoves it down her panties, black and lacey, you retract your hand and look at her without saying anything. Worried she might have done something wrong she begins “oh my god I got the wrong idea y/n I’m so so sor-” “get in the back” you cut her off.

Climbing in the back she waits on instructions from you, you join her in the back. You position yourself on top of her laying her head on the back door, you scan over her helpless body so small and fragile under your touch, starting by kissing her breasts leaving marks on the sides of them you move down to her torso. Giving sweet and soft kisses occasionally leaving a hickey or two, you make it down to her covered pussy, kissing above the lacey garment you tease her. “Please y/n please please please I can’t” she begs “I got it I got it” you pull her underwear to the side she releases a sigh of relief not long after followed a scream of pleasure as you plunge your face into her sex, lapping up whatever juices are flowing and gently sucking on the bundle of nerves at the top. “N-not so.. fast y/n... I won’t… I won’t last!!” she manages out through broken whimpers and cries, which only encourages you to break her even more, make her cry out an orgasm, make her the best little pet you could ask for. You stick a ring and middle finger inside of her while your mouth focuses on her clit, not that pushes her over the edge. Her mind blanks and all she can see is white, you speed up to enhance her orgasm, you’re then met with the strong bursts of fluid that fall from her. “She’s a squirter huh” you think to yourself hungrily lapping up as many juices as possible, “mmhmm y/n y/n y/n ahh please you’re so-” her body twitches “you’re so amazing mmm”. You remove your fingers and place her panties back where they belong, sitting up adoring her aroused figure you spit out “you think you’d top me huh?” followed by a cheeky grin and a condescending giggle.

The car lights up and a ring echoes “Ymir” flashes on the dashboard “incoming call”...

THE EEENNNDDD pt.2

AHHHHHH IM SO OVERWHELMED BY THE POSITIVITY AND LOVELY FEEDBACK I LOVE YALL AWHHHH!!! I will continue to write and upload for this series!! Thank you for the patience *muah*

[jungxk]

just one (viii)

summary: the only guy on campus who’s track record trumped that of your best friend’s - park jimin - was jeon jungkook. not that that was a problem…until he set his sights on you.

notes: first of all i wanna thank the people who supported me and encouraged me through one of the worst writers blocks of my life. all the messages and comments are the reason why i finally managed to post this. special thanks to @whippedforkook for helping me with the monstrous tagging process as well as giving me so much praise. and also @lonelyending for cheering me on for a literal YEAR bc thats how long i cried over this fic! this story is so special to me. we’re in the home stretch now x

warnings: mentions of illegal drug use and distribution, swearing, brief smut.

genre: drama, romance, humour, college!au

wordcount: 8k

tagging: @cutechim @benz-biarritz @gyukult @bangulin @eatersanonymous @alyssa1926 @skivv1es @a-sucker-for-them-sappy-shit @moonights @jeymuffins @juuneaux @catsukiii @andreaisaac @whatheydontunderstand @sreveles @noruls619 @henryharios @just-a-fuxked-up-kid @befriendswithj @btsbesharam @poemsandpunani @taelha @misosoup-forthesoul @jikooksmut @heart-eyedmf @the-piano-woman @angrysunshine @chaoticpaperfanhoagie @jsungshine @ci-yen @faby-montana @shinypeanutsportshero @jooniestrivia @alucards-s @cynamyngirl @jiminie-angel @myskoova @jkshoneybuns @smokintae @remmykinsff @majinbuwu @jangx2manboongx2 @potatodogs @seul-queen @alpharyth @blenxxxg @plsky @th-singularity @bapbaptothetop @hermiones-enchantment @stomachfilledwithbutterflies @euphorora @supachloe94 @jiminxjimout @ggukkieland @just-another-fic-recs-blog @jalexad​

part i // part ii // part iii // part iv // part v // part vi // part vii // part viii // part ix // part x

x

4 years ago

x

jimin hated yugyeom.

well, maybe hate was a strong word. he just didn't like talking to him, being around him, hearing his name or interacting with him on any level, social or otherwise. he really tried though, since he was one of jungkook's closest friends and still respectfully referred to him as hyung above all else. and if anything, jimin would always have a soft spot for jungkook, the kid he used to coddle when his own brother wasn't around. but having said that, there wasn't really much basis for not liking yugyeom. it was just a gut feeling jimin couldn't explain, a very subtle callousness about him only jimin could pick up on. for the most part he was just like very other mild mannered boy by day and party animal by night, but jimin still ducks when he sees him enter the library.

"fuck," he hisses under his breath, scooping up his laptop to stride behind a book shelf for good measure. because sometimes, contrary to popular belief, jimin wanted to be alone. he didn't want to make small talk or listen to someone tell him about how well they scored on their last paper or complain about their annoying girlfriend. sometimes jimin wanted to have no thoughts and listen to fleetwood mac as per his human rights. which is why he shoves into the first private study room he sees.

and not an empty one at that. there's a girl inside, sitting cross-legged in her chair at a desk with an array of dried up paint tubes and brushes surrounding open sketchbooks. you don't look annoyed or even that phased, just amused as you give him a once over before going back to painting. "on the run from solji?"

jimin blinks, back still pressed against the door. "huh?" he regards you properly. "i'm sorry, have we met before?"

"not really," you admit with a sheepish smile, which is when jimin suddenly realises that you're...attractive. "solji is in my stats class. you hooked up with her last week at some party and she told me about it."

"oh," jimin takes in your plethora of art supplies. "you don't look like a stem student."

there's a glimmer of something in your eyes, and though you hide it well jimin knows he's struck a nerve. "yeah, i get that a lot."

"it's not solji by the way," jimin clarifies. for some reason. "that i'm hiding from. just a bellend i don't have the energy for right now."

you smile. "it's fine. you don't owe me your life story."

"i do when i'm about to impose on your...study time," jimin peers through the window in the door, wincing when yugyeom enters the hallway. "what would it take for you to let me stay in here for a while?"

you pause for a second. "honestly? just be quiet and leave me alone. is that okay?"

jimin perks up, a weight leaving his chest. "perfect, actually."

x

x

x

[jungkook 11:42pm]: why does it say wings on it

[jungkook 11:42pm] where is it flying

[you: 11:43pm] ffs kook

[you: 11:44pm] im still on the toilet can u just hurry up

[you 11:44pm] grab some tampons too pls

[jungkook 11:46pm] fine what size pussy do u wear

[you 11:46pm] i hate u

[jungkook 11:53pm] ???? ? ? well? ????

[you 11:54pm] REGULAR 

jungkook giggles at his phone, already having left the women's sanitary aisle to grab some chocolate. months later and teasing you was still bundles of fun. he knew for a fact that you were sat there with that angry pout on your face, nose crinkled. he had never bought anything like this before, but jungkook had enough brain cells to know that chocolate was another necessity for that time of the month. after grabbing a large hazelnut bar, he pauses beside the oreos before grabbing a packet of those too. just for good measure. he strides to the self checkout - because even he wasn't man enough for the cashier yet - nearly dropping his array of sanitary products and confectionary when somebody calls out his name from behind the queue.

"kook!" the voice is unmistakably yugyeom's, confirmed by the hand that clamps jungkook over the shoulder and swivels him round before he could think about hiding his socially compromising shopping items. it takes a second for yugyeom to notice, doing a double take at the pads atop his small tower of goods. he holds back a laugh, balancing a bottle of gin in one hand while he waves back at some friends to continue. they were clearly making their pit stop before a night out, probably pre's if they still start as late as jungkook remembers. with his hair styled and expensive cologne lingering, jungkook almost forgets he probably looks unrecognisable in his sweats and cotton-fresh hoodie. friday nights weren't for cuddling. still, yugyeom's smile is welcoming and familiar. "got the munchies? and maybe also a uterus?"

"shut up," jungkook grumbles, averting his eyes. he shifts to his other foot uncomfortably. "my friend just needed a favour, that's all."

"uh huh," yugyeom gives him a teasing look. "is this friend the reason why i barely saw you at jin's the other week?"

jungkook blinks back at him. "wait, you were at that party? i had no idea!" a boyish smile breaks over his face. "why didn't you call me? i haven't seen you since-"

"minseok-hyung's new years eve party," yugyeom throws his head back with a laugh. "remember how we ended up on a boat after the ball dropped and-"

"spent all of new years day detained by the coast guard!" jungkook finishes with a mischievous cackle of his own, nearly dropping the tampons in the process. "fuck, that was so much fun! we need to meet up again, i haven't been out with the guys in so long."

"well no wonder," he quips a brow at jungkook's shopping again. "word got out you're a family man but i didn't believe it. until now, that is."

jungkook's smile falls. "what do you mean?"

yugyeom looks at him for a second, confused by jungkook's surprise. yugyeom was never quite as diplomatic as namjoon or yoongi, to put it lightly. and definitely nowhere near as accomodating as jimin. which is why his next words make jungkook's back stiffen. "bro, look at yourself. you got dairy milk in one hand and tampax in the other. on a friday night. the next time i see you i wouldn't be shocked if you had a baby buggy and a mortgage." still, yugyeom throws him an apologetic look. like a mouse caught in a trap. "face it, kook. you're old news."

"what? that's not true," his brows furrow unhappily. "i don't know what you're talking about. it's not like she's my..."

he can't say the word, but it hangs between them like a dead weight.

"yeah, right," the condescending look on yugyeom's face was starting to agitate him. "you totally blanked us at jin's after she showed up. not even just jin's..." he thinks twice about holding his tongue, but as always, decides against it. "i don't know you, jungkook. whoever this new jungkook is. it's been months. you used to hit us up and be independent and spontaneous and wild and now you're just...someone's boyfriend.

"stop fucking saying that," jungkook snaps, all visible signs of friendliness gone.

"why?" a beat. "do you even use a wrap with her anymore?"

jungkook splutters, heat rushing to his ears and hands in a stinging combination of anger and embarrassment. "how is that any of your business? the fuck are you asking me something like that, as if you-"

"thought so," yugyeom looks away from him with a sigh. if anything, yugyeom knew never to overstay his welcome but that clearly backfired tonight. "whatever, jungkook," he looks over his shoulder at him. "guess you're the last one to find out you're officially married."

"you're ridiculous," jungkook scoffs. "all this over condoms? grow up, yugyeom."

"only couples do it raw," yugyeom turns away from him, alcohol in tow as he waves a hand over his shoulder to join his friends like jungkook was nothing but a lost cause. "you would remember that if you still had game."

jungkook stands there, dumbfounded while the group of boys exit the store noisily but he can't hear a thing. the siren that had been itching the back of his mind all this time was suddenly there at full force, right between his eyes. the glaring truth that yugyeom might be right makes his knees buckle. all those rules jungkook once had, all those measures he kept in place to protect his liberty, to prevent this very occurence - where were they? what happened to them? as the sweet and accommodating counterpart to jimin, why had you never complied? though, the blame wasn't on your hands alone. he got complacent, comfortable. lenient. and now without even realising he was here, a scene from a romcom in the middle of the night, with nothing to say for himself but fuck. the realisations wouldn't stop racing, one after another on the conveyer belt of his anxiety.

the photos on his phone; mostly you. time spent, usually with you. the portfolio for his latest photography module also had some resemblance to your interests. charcoal pencils, night drives, orchids. like the ones you always drew on any scrap of paper lying around. now that he thinks about it, he's seen nothing but your orchids for months. and not just that - you wore his clothes sometimes too. his bathroom had your toothbrush, contraceptive pills and coconut shampoo. his closest friends, his hyungs...not one of them was devoid of affection for you. he wasn't even confident that if the choice was presented, they would still pick him over you.

by the time jungkook finishes paying and practically sprints to his truck in a daze, he can hardly keep himself from shaking. he palms the wheel compulsively, he could feel the sweat in his sideburns, hoodie suddenly suffocating him. it smelled of you.

and then, like a final curtain call: was he just your latest fixer-upper project? some good girl wet dream to play out in the wake of your emotionally traumatic past? a slap in the face to seokjin, maybe, and nothing more? when you were done, when he was out of your system, when you knew his taste by heart and had nothing new left to try - would you stay? did you even know how to?

did he?

jungkook starts the engine. he drives to your door, drops your bag of snacks and pads on the porch, and texts you before leaving. he does not go inside.

x

x

x

"you sure you'll be okay with just the boys?"

you scoff at seulgi when she pins you with a worrying look, taking some of her clothes out of her bag to re-fold them just so you had something to do with your hands. jisoo had already left for the long weekend with her family, so there was no one there to fill up the empty space between your awakward reply. you didn't know how to tell the girls that jungkook hadn't contacted you in nearly a month. and even though he was a notable flight risk from the beginning, you couldn't help but feel like there was hostility there. every now and again he'd at least send a nude or have a quick phone call when he was drunk or high at three in the morning, but you hadn't heard a peep from him. you couldn't stand the idea of someone you cared about harbouring comtempt for you, but the fear of reaching out and somehow making the situation worse outweighed it tenfold. 

you look up to see seulgi still staring at you with concern. "of course i'll be fine! they're boys, not piranhas."

"at least piranhas contribute our ecosystem. boys just cause problems for the hell of it," seulgi lays a hand on the crown of your head like a berating big sister, swivelling you to look at her in your fit of giggles. the urge to nestle you under blankets like a baby bird made her chest heave, and you could tell. "i'm serious. if jimin tries anything, call me immediately okay?"

"jimin?" you snort. "out of a room full of delinquents, my ex, and taehyung, you're worried about jimin of all people?"

seulgi wrinkles her nose. "god, when you say it like that its like i'm throwing you to the dogs." she pauses. "something's up with jimin. i don't know what it is, but he's...off."

you tilt your head innocently, remembering the brief interaction you had with hobi at seokjin's party. you had been so caught up in jungkook - or lack thereof - you hadn't thought to press him about it afterwards. in truth, jimin remained as...jimin as ever. if he was acting differently you certainly couldn't tell. "you think so?"

"mmm," she leans on the lip of the open suitcase thoughtfully. "but maybe with jungkook there, he'll behave himself."

you gulp, fiddling with his watch on your wrist anxiously. "maybe."

x

x

x

you nearly yelp when you feel a big hand swivel around your waist, bucking into the kitchen counter reflexively. jungkook always did this before rubbing his boner against your ass, but the light scent of citrus and short squeeze lets you know immediately that its taehyung. hoseok, jimin, namjoon and yoongi were still in the living room playing video games, giving taehyung the perfect opening to intercept you. namjoon and yoongi had insisted that you come over to their place after finding out you'd be alone for the weekend, and you had completely refused before taehyung's coaxing. and of course, jimin's persuasive nudging. even though you felt safe and relaxed here, it felt wrong to be in jungkook's friends' place without him. almost like a breaching of an unspoken boundary.

and clearly, taehyung picked up on your discomfort by the way he stared at you so softly. his back was to the sink, his sillhouette particularly long and lean this evening. "you need to lighten up, princess. you keep looking over your shoulder so much it's making me nervous!"

your visibly droop with a sigh. "i'm sorry tae. i've had a lot on my mind lately, and..."

he claps his hands on your shoulders, teeth peeking through his grin. "you're not doing anything illegal by being here without jungkook."

you wince at his name. "have you always been able to read my mind like this?"

"absolutely," taehyung's brown eyes look so rich up close. "you're allowed to have friends that are also his friends, because - and try to stick with me on this - relationships between people are allowed to be independant from the primary circles they met in. mind boggling concept, i know."

you wack him on the chest until he laughs. "stop making fun of my anxious thought processes! its called mental illness, sherlock! i can't help it!"

his nose scrunches cutely, enjoying your first fiery outburst of the day. "whatever. i call it not getting laid for a month and losing critical thinking abilities from it."

you gape at him indignantly while taehyung roars with laughter. "you're such a dickhead," you hiss through gritted teeth, yanking his hair and jabbing your fingers in his sides the way you would with jimin during a tickle fight. "whores have feelings too, taehyung! whores have feelings too!"

you both fall about with laughter, knocking over half the snacks on the counter in the process which only makes the pair of you laugh even more. it's such childish chaos trying to clean up the mess on the tiny kitchen floor that neither of you notice the front door open, or the gust of metaphorical and literal wind that follows. watching taehyung trying to salvage a bag of broken crisps is just so funny that the presence of an another voice in the living room goes unregistered, as do the footsteps leading up the hallway to the kitchen, so you have no time to brace yourself or properly pull yourself together with you see-

"...jungkook."

yours and taehyung's heads snap to the doorway. jungkook stands there with almost complete lack of emotion on his face to the pair of you kneeling in crumbs and napkins. there's a brief pause where the tension in your eye contact alone was so strong that it felt wrong to breathe. but it is shortlived. jungkook tiptoes over you like spilled milk, reaching for a glass of water. you and taehyung lock eyes while the tap runs in the awkward silence. "hey. you okay?"

"um," you're not sure whether to stand up, hug him, look at him, or even face him. "yeah! yeah, i'm fine."

he nods politely. "hyung?"

even taehyung looks visibly uncomfortable. "i'm good."

"cool. see you later," he says, downing the glass impressively fast before leaving the room just as fast as he entered it.

you and taehyung stare at each other again, not understanding why you both feel like kids caught eating cake before dinner. you could feel the sweat pricking at your back from the realisation. jungkook had no idea you'd be here, and given that interaction he'd probably want to leave now. there was always the inkling woven between his radio silence that he was done with you, but you never let yourself take it seriously out of logic. because how could months of passion and tenderness and honesty be undone so irrevocably like that? it didn't make sense. you hadn't changed. you were the same girl he hit on relentlessly and chased against all odds. so what was different now?

"____," taehyung calls your name gently, and it's only then you realise you're already up and trailing after jungkook into the living room. when you walk in he's already putting his shoes on to leave again, barely making eye contact with you while he chats absently to his hyungs so he can look busy. the four boys on the large sofa can only reply wearily, eyes darting between the pair of you like a firework was about to blow to soon. and it was.

you could feel it in your throat, under your breast bone, bubbling up your stomach. "wait, jungkook. um...h-how have you been? i haven't heard from you in-"

"i've been good," he keeps tying and re-tying his laces without looking up. "super busy. you know how it is."

his curtness makes you flinch. this same time last month jungkook used to kiss you senseless before he had both feet in the door. he'd ring the doorbell incessantly like a child and greet you with the biggest, toothiest grin you had ever seen. he'd make fun of your bed head and squeeze your cheeks until you'd snap at him. and now when he looked at you he hated every second of it. your mother had the same look. your eyes start to burn involuntarily. "yeah, i do. how is uni? your final project is due soon, right? what theme did you pick in the end?"

"the one i told you about," he stands up abruptly. "sorry, noona. something came up. i'll see you arou-"

"something came up?" you step closer to him. "something came up the second you saw my face? or did you really just trek all the way to your hyungs' place for a glass of water, jungkook?"

jungkook stiffens, but is determined not to lose face. and it's difficult to do under your big, accusatory eyes and jimin's death stare at his back. the whole room was waiting for his response, so he just shoves his hands in his pockets resolutely. "i needed to see yoongi hyung, but i can come another time."

you fold your arms. "well it's clearly important, and you're here now. so don't let me stop you."

"but you will stop me," jungkook snaps. "that's the problem."

"kook-ah," yoongi warns quietly, but he took one look at your face and knew the damage was done. jimin was already standing up, circling around the back of the sofa towards you. the red lights were all there; your watery eyes, your trembling hands. every breath you took looked difficult for you to complete and only jimin noticed.

"what are you talking about?" you squint. it takes you a second to understand; yoongi's guilty expression, jungkook's indifference. "oh, you're fucking kidding me." your resolve breaks for a second turning away only to glare back at jungkook with so much fire you can hardly stand it. "you're selling again? are you insane, jungkook?"

"see," jungkook's eyes are stony. "i knew you'd get this way."

"what other way am i supposed to get?" his lack of response only infuriates you more. it felt disrespectful. "jungkook, you're not a kid anymore. if you get caught with drugs the consequences are serious! forget the potential jail time, you could get kicked out of university, it would go on your record forever and-"

"stop talking to me like i'm a kid!"

"then stop acting like one!" you hate raising your voice, but it keeps climbing without your approval. "did you think about this for even five minutes? this isn't like just going to juvie like before and being done with it jungkook. your hyungs can't bail you out of everything."

"this is a lot of talk for someone who lapped up those fancy paints without a second thought," jungkook says darkly. his eyes aren't like you remember, his face solemn and near unrecognisable. "or did you think that getting that kind of money overnight is only something that's possible through daddy's credit card?"

dread blooms like a garden inside you. "that's...that's how you bought the paint set?"

"welcome to the real world," he quips. "as if selling overpriced weed to a bunch of pick-me-freshmans is considered a crime against humanity to anyone but you."

"you think that's why i'm yelling at you right now?" your voice was growing hoarse, desperate. "you think that's the problem i have with you being literal drug dealer, jungkook?"

he hates it. the sweltering silence, the judgmental eyes digging into his back, the slow realisation that the tears in your eyes were not at him but for him. jungkook's ears ring enough to make him sway on the spot if his feet weren't planted so firmly on the dingy carpet, this metaphorical ground. he couldn't shake the feeling that his lifestyle was only an issue now because of you, how he never felt a shred of guilt about any of this shit until he met you. and if there was anything that jungkook never responded well to, it was pity. and he could feel it from every person in the room, all people that that once cherished and coddled him until you came along. he swallows, throat dry from the way he couldn't look at you knowing what he was going to say next.

"you're embarrassing yourself, noona. you're not my girlfriend and you never were, so stop acting like it."

cotton. it's very faint, under the layers of conflicting cologne and beer and smoke, but jungkook still smelled of cotton while he spat acid. nobody could speak, even though jungkook never raised his voice let alone a hand to you, it still hit like a slap in the face. it sunk into the walls, your clothes, suddenly every hair on your body felt heavy with it. dirty. the shame came first, the humiliation next. and then the sorrow, the dread, and finally the defeat. you knew the stages well by now, and they were cycling through you like clockwork. how foolish you were, to make the same mistake again. nobody dared to move, everyone but jungkook staring at you in denial and horror. they couldn't believe their eyes when you nod steadily, bowing your head to the floor.

jimin is already slotting himself between you, his jaw tight. "that's enough, kook. just leave already."

"no," you stop him, unnervingly resigned. that single word cuts through all six men with ease. "he's right." you step around jimin, closing the space between you and jungkook. for a brief moment he wonders if you'll actually hit him, but somehow watching you unclasp his watch from your wrist and drop it on the coffee table in front of him is far worse. the sound seems to ring like church bells, definitive and umistakable. "you're right, i'm not your girlfriend. you win jungkook."

they all watch you leave in dismay, listen to the door closing softly behind you. within a second jimin sprints after you, calling your name, leaving everyone else dumbfounded. jungkook's stare could bore a hole into the abandoned watch on the table, still ticking away like nothing changed. like his eyes weren't burning, lightheaded at the realisation that he would never wear a watch again let alone the one he put on you.

x

x

x

to an outsider, you looked like you were coping well considering you just got dumped in front of all your friends. but jimin knew that face. your stony eyes, lips pulled thin as if to seal inside the collapse of a monument. you took the tea he offered, and then his arms, your face finding his chest with ease. muscle memory. his torso was a tad shorter than jungkook's, his heart closer to your mouth as if the steady thumps were asking for a kiss of acknowledgement. every time you close your eyes you could see jungkooks face, hard and unforgiving and nothing like the man you trusted all this time. but it wasn't a new expression; you parents looked at you similarly the last time you saw them. it was the look of someone who had no regrets cutting all ties. and now, jungkook was behind them in a lost list of people who chose to be strangers over loving you.

jimin sighs when you cry into his chest, brushing the back of your head gently. he had been ready for this for months, but he still hated to see you this way. again. it made his bones itch, his skin crawl uncomfortably every time you weeped. the only time he considered violence was when you were crying. but he knew what to do, laying down across the sofa so you could curl up into a ball next him, head on his bicep and face smushed into the crook of his shoulder. you used to cry like this for hours and hours, his arm familiar with the prickle of pins and needles. but it was the only place you felt safe. tucked into jimin's side is where you would always belong, and that truth was more glaringly obvious than ever now.

"lets get something to eat," he offers eventually, hand craddling the crown of your head like a child. jimin's other hand on your hip is warm and heavy when he pats you soothingly. in your episodes, you responded well to touch. "what about thai food?"

"not hungry," you grumble against him.

"we could make something together?" he peers down at your lack of response. "come on, babe. you gotta eat something. you didn't even have breakfast-"

"why am i so stupid?" you whisper, a fresh bout of tears welling up.

jimin rubs your thigh. "it's not your fault."

"yes it is. jungkook gave me plenty of red flags, and i ignored all of them-"

"oh, i meant you being stupid."

you scoff. "cheers."

"what?" jimin cocks a brow when you lift your head to look up at him. he wets his lips and you follow the swipe of his tongue thoughtlessly, distracted enough by his touch and proximity that you take a second to digest his words. "it's not like any of this exactly came as a surprise. you ignored me, remember? wanted to flex your big girl pants."

you pull away from him and sit up, forcibly shutting out the daze that jimin routinely puts you under. "what's wrong with you? can't you be polite and wait for a couple hours before laying into me like a normal person? jesus, jimin."

"so let me get this straight," jimin sits up, watching your back as you sit away from him. "you're mad because i'm not telling you what you want to hear?"

"no," you say, head shaking. "i'm not mad. i'm upset because i came here to be comforted by my friend and you're just making me feel worse."

"what do you want me to say, ____? that i had high hopes from the start?" jimin pushes his hair back, brows now at a sharp incline from frustration. "i told you starting something with jungkook was trouble but you didn't listen. why should i feed your victim complex when all i've done is try to help you?"

"victim complex?" you repeat, standing up slowly. the sudden steadiness of your voice causes jimin to panic.

"not like that. don't take it like that, it's just," he's suddenly before you, his warm hands palming up your arms warmly. "i didn't wanna see you get like this and it happened anyway, is all i'm saying." he sighs when your scowl doesn't let up. "if hobi hyung hadn't have given up so easy, then maybe…maybe this would never have happened. maybe if i had been harsher with him then you would have-"

"what are you talking about?" you ask quietly, searching jimin's face. "give up so easy? what's that supposed to mean?"

he looks away, hands slipping off you. "it's nothing."

"jimin."

he struggles to look at you, tongue in cheek. his lips purse for a moment, pink like roses. he's wearing that navy jumper you like. "look, it's not a big deal. he wasn't supposed to fuck you or anything, just take you out for a while. get your mind off kookie, show you a nice time."

your blood runs cold. "what?"

jimin's expression softens. "it's not as bad as it sounds-"

"really?" your voice is sharp, sharper than he's ever heard it. you recoil as if you had been struck for the second time today. "because it sounds like you asked some guy to keep me occupied like i'm a fucking dog. all because you can't stand the idea of me being within a meter of jungkook-"

he steps in, but you step back. "you know that's not true, _."

"don't i?" you scoff, covering your face in disbelief. "jimin, you've been hellbent against me even looking at the guy since day fucking one."

"because i didn't want you to get hurt!" jimin counters, eyes downcast. "i know, okay? i know how much of a dick it makes me sound, but its not like it hurt you when you had no idea! hoseok broke it off before you even knew about it so why-"

"because it's worse," you turn away from him. "you tried to control me. choose what's best for me because you think you know better than i do. sound familiar?"

his jaw sets, and it's like you can hear the twine snap in his head, the percussion of his heartbeat above yours even though he doesn't close the space between you. jimin stares at you for a long minute before drawing in a thin breath. "fine," he steps in, and you can't look away. "you want me to say it? fine. i'll say it."

suddenly the air is lace thin around you as you stare at him, waiting. jimin looks off somewhere else, somewhere you can't reach. "don't tell me you haven't thought about it, because i know you have. if i have you must have too. and lately its all i can think about - being with you, holding you, being the one who gets to touch you. and yeah, maybe it took having to see you with jungkook for me to realise how much i want all that, i put my hands up. but you have no idea what's it like to watch the person you love most get toyed around with by a time bomb like that. i've seen jungkook go through girls like underwear and i love him, god i love him, but even the idea of you being one of those wasted girls sitting outside a party crying over his sorry ass makes my fucking ears ring."

"j-jimin…" you whisper, but you have nothing to say. your hands shake.

"you deserve more than that, ____. you deserve more than waiting around for booty calls or living up to what the next guy wants. from jungkook, hoseok, anyone. you deserve someone's devotion and yeah, maybe all this time i've been too much of a pussy to give it. maybe all this time i was tiptoeing around my feelings for you because i knew if i admitted to myself that i loved you - if i admitted i was just like every other guy - i'd actually set the bar for something other than disappointment. id actually have to step up, and i didn't know if i could do it. i still don't. but if it has to be someone…it should be me."

suddenly he's holding your hands, calming the tremble that rattles them. his words bunch up together in your ears, the meaning lost amidst your awe. "jimin….jimin what are you saying? where is all this coming from, i don't...i don't understand wh-"

"i'm saying," he cups your face. "choose me." he pulls you in. so, so close. "choose me, not jungkook. not anyone else. me."

and there's a part of you that has already caved. that's already kissing him, melting into his arms like you've wanted to for so, so long. you're falling back onto the couch with him in a fit of giggles, curling back into his chest to hide your watery eyes, asking him why the fuck he took so long. you chat together between teasing kisses, pour your hearts out, maybe cry a little. later you would make tea and order pad thai and watch the office all night and fall asleep together in the living room well past dawn and then-

you close your eyes. "i can't."

"you can," jimin says, so passionately you shudder. his brown eyes are teaming with too much determination and ardour for his own good, and you both know it. its difficult to grapple with how huge a risk he's taking, because jimin never takes risks. it made the whole situation seem dire. "you know you can, ____. it's us. there's no one like us."

you don't know how you're not crying yet. you only have jimin to hold onto, hands balled in his shirt without knowing if you're about to push him away or pull him in forever. "maybe back then. maybe if you'd have said all this before," you feel empty, the beat of your pulse suddenly strong in your fingertips. "but it doesn't matter anymore."

he shakes his head in denial, his determination palpable. "of course it does-"

"i'm in love with him," you say. to jimin. to yourself. to the world, finally. "i'm in love with jungkook." holding jimin's stare isn't as difficult as you thought it'd be. "you know if you'd have done all this a few months ago…if you'd have just...i was always yours without question, jimin. and you knew it." it's his turn to bristle under the strain of your voice. "jungkook isn't perfect. i'll be the first one to admit that. he's made me cry, he fucks up, he makes mistakes. but he's never lied to me. he never made decisions for me. he never passed judgement on what i should or shouldn't do with my life. something that i never thought i wouldn't able to say about you, too."

there's a brief moment where everything stops. neither of you can believe what you just said. jimin watches you, frozen in his place as you take your bag, eyes glittering with tears when he calls for you. suddenly he's the time bomb he feared becoming, the panic in his eyes lighting them up like fire crackers. for the first time in his life, he stumbles over his words, and then his feet when you reach for the door, all composure lost. he was unravelling like a tapestry in front of you, never to be repaired, and he could feel it. "____. ____, please," jimin chokes, his cheeks blotchy. "i wanted to protect you, i was just trying to help. don't go. please don't go. i was trying to help you."

"no. you were trying to have me." you say, closing the door behind you.

x

x

x

you have no idea what time it is when you hear the bell ring incessantly.

it had been hours since you'd returned home from jimin's, but there was no way for you to keep track when your only priority was just keeping yourself afloat. you turned your phone off, drew the curtains, and resolved to alternate between sitting in seulgi and jisoo's rooms until they came back. you didn't know what else to do. when you weren't crying you were hyperventilating, and when that stopped the absence of emotion was so powerful you could barely keep your eyes open. you were exhausted but could not sleep. starving but could not eat. it was a miracle you even made it down the stairs, using what little strength you had to yank it open without even thinking about who could be on the other side in the middle of the fucking night. but at this point, you would gladly take a serial killer over jimin or jungkook.

"taehyung," you breathe when you take in his face, relieved. you must look like absolute shit because he scans your face and winces. 

"jimin told me," he says, the apology in his voice and expression was almost painful to register. "he told me everything. ____, i'm so sorry. i should have told you about the hoseok thing, i just thought it would be worse coming from me, and then i tried to force jimin into confessing but then he didn't because he's jimin, and now-"

"you're only allowed to come inside if you stop apologising," you say weakly, voice haggered from the hours of crying.

taehyung's pouty expression almost makes you smile with how cute he looks, gingerly stepping over the threshhold. "i really am sorry though."

"for what," you say monotonously, closing the door behind him while he takes off his shoes. "my inexplicably terrible taste in men? my uncanny ability to get manipulated by literally anyone who shows me a scrap of affection? or my absolutey shredded-to-shit attachment style thats barely intact let alone functioning healthily? after hoppping between the first two for a few hours i'd personally go for the latter. but whatever."

"please shut up," taehyung sighs, bringing you into his arms before you could have a second thought about it. "you need to amp up the misandry in this context. a lot of this had nothing to do with you and everything to do jimin and jungkook."

you're too tired to open your eyes, snuggling into the softness of taehyung's chest. you’re too exhausted to argue. "where did you learn the word misandry? have you been reading?"

"yeah," you can hear his big, pleased grin. "i know you and the girls have been calling me a himbo behind my back."

"affectionately," you add, peering up at him. he wipes the wetness off your cheeks, moving upstairs to your room with your hand in his. he fetches you a glass of water before putting you into bed like he's paid to do it. taehyung was the cuddliest person you had ever met, but you had rarely seen him dote on anyone. "girls love himbos. it's a compliment."

"not all girls," he mutters when he returns from the bathroom with a glass of water. "drink this, would you? you look so dry it's making me itchy."

you do as he says with a roll of your eyes. "what do you mean?" you finish your water with a big gulp. "jisoo loves dumb guys, what are you talking about?"

taehyung looks away from you, bottom lip rolling up under his teeth so fast you barely catch it. he pulls up your desk chair next to your bed, thinking long and hard before meeting your eyes again. "i don't mean jisoo."

you don't understand at first, but after staring at his face for a long minute your stomach drops. "don't. don't you fucking dare," another beat of silence. you rip the covers off you to scamble to your knees, grab your pillow and hurl it at taehyung's head. "taehyung, please don't tell me that the one remaining, healthy relationship i have with a man has also been shot to shit because i swear to god i'm gonna-"

"it's not a big deal," he says firmly, and he really does mean it. taehyung catches your wrists when you lunge at him, effectively ending your outburst before it can begin. he keeps hold of them while he stares into your eyes, watching the way they fill up with a fresh bout of tears. "i've had a crush on you for a while, so what? it's not anyone's business but mine so don't worry about it."

you try not to scream at him. "how long?"

"...since the start." he shrugs. "it's not like i could have done anything anyway. with jimin around. he’d never have it."

"but...! but..." you splutter, the highlight reel of your friendship suddenly marred before your eyes. "but you let me talk to you about boys! you gave me advice with hobi and jimin and jungkook and...! you encouraged jimin to confess to me. and the whole thing with jisoo?"

he wets his lips guiltily. "jisoo is a nice girl. i like her, but...not like you. i've always liked you."

you shake your head in horror, your face crumpling. bile rose in your throat. "so all of that...playing with my friend like that. was just to get to me?"

"listen to me," taehyung says firmly, gripping your wrists to make you look at him again. he's so close you can feel the warmth of his breath on yours, and you never realised how large taehyung's torso was compared to yours before. he could have smothered you, but he didn't. in all senses. "the way jimin and jungkook handled their feelings is on them, just like how this is on me. it doesn't matter if i'm fucking you or not, you're my friend and i'll always want people to do right by you. and that includes me."

there was nothing else to say, so taehyung wordlessly wipes your face again and fetches you more water before retreating to sleep on the couch downstairs. all the while you sat there in your bed, confused and bewildered and thoughtful. the same bed jungkook fucked you on. the same bed jimin held you in. out of all the men in your life, taehyung was the only one who treated his feelings for you with reverence. there wasn't one interaction you could think of where he made his feelings clear, where he even hinted towards wanting something more. if he hadn't have said anything tonight, in the wake of one of the most emotionally tumultuous days of your life, you would still be in the dark about it all. and that was the scariest part. you didn't know anyone else who hadn't let their feelings for you effect how they treated you. so ultimately, it was possible.

and jimin and jungkook chose not to do that. but taehyung did.

taehyung did.

when you finally pad downstairs after hours of ruminating, jisoo's bedroom door is wide open. and that's who you should be thinking about now - your friend and sister jisoo - as the sky begins to lighten with the signs of morning. you hadn't slept for over twenty four hours, you were hungry and thirsty, delirious from the whirlwind of losing the two most important men in your life in one day. but still, you are drawn to taehyung. taehyung, who never asked anything of you. taehyung, who was as silent as he was selfless this whole time. taehyung who routinely put what he wanted aside in favour of what was best for you. taehyung, who protected you without needing credit or recognition for it. taehyung, taehyung, taehyung, taehyung, taehyung-

"taehyung," you whisper scraping your nails through his hair. his eyes fluttered open, twisting his head to face you as you hovered above him. he could barely see you in the darkness. "taehyung, wake up."

"what is it?" he croaks, sitting up with half-lidded eyes and a yawn. he doesn't know how to read the expression on your face. he swings his legs off the sofa in a sitting position, wearing nothing but his boxers and tee, visibly alarmed. "what happened? are you okay?"

you take his face in your hands and kiss him. 

taehyung stiffens against you, breath drawn thin. you pull away to gauge his expression, desperately searching his eyes in the darkness. for discomfort, disapproval, anything negative at all. the absolute ardour you find instead could knock you down if taehyung didn't reach for your neck, kissing you again. you whine at the feel of his tongue, having no idea where such sudden and intense arousal was coming from. when you pull away with shaky limbs, you climb onto his thick thighs so he can feel your wetness through his boxers. taehyung grunts at the sensation, and again when you kiss him passionately and without abandon. the sweet girl every guy he knew was agonising over, suddenly in his lap. he's barely had his tongue down your throat for ten minutes and you're already rocking into him, his erection betraying his resolve.

it's better than he dreamed. 

"taehyung," you gasp, palming him now. he groans when he pulls away to look at your mouth, glistening with his saliva when you take his hand and guide it down to your arousal. "please."

[emmies-archives]

-Public | Hinata Shoyo- 

fem!reader x sub-timeskip!hinata shoyo 

Warnings: Nsfw, degradation, public sex, masturbation, exhibitionism, voyeurism, punishment, dacryphilia, edging, getting caught, shower sex, implied threesome, 

Summary: Your supposed to pick Hinata up from practice, except he’s made you wait over an hour, and he’s ignored your texts.

WC: 1.7k

A/N: ig im just fuckin thirsty as hell today... also this is unedited bc im lazy, once again, pls ignore typos. 

-Hinata Shoyo-

Light shone into the car with each person that drove by as they left the parking lot you had been sitting in for nearly an hour now. Practice had ended over an hour ago, yet Hinata hadn’t come out of the gym yet.

It was normal for him to run late, but this was getting out of hand. He hadn’t even sent a single text to let you know what was going on.

Reading the last one you sent asking when he was coming out, a sigh left your lips when you noticed. He’d left you on read.

A part of you wanted to leave him at the gym, for him to find his own way back to your shared apartment; but you couldn’t. As badly as he deserved it, you had other plans for him.

This wasn’t the first time Hinata had done this either, sometimes he’d get so caught up in whatever he was doing he’d forget to even check his phone, let alone look at the time. You wanted to cut him some slack, but you had warned him once before.

Glancing at the doors once more, you took a slow breath in. Waiting for him to come out for one more minute. When there was no sign of him still, you turned the car off, heading towards the gym.

Hunting down your boyfriend was the last thing that you wanted to do, you were exhausted already. Your entire day had been draining, and you only wanted to go home and relax. But there you were, pushing the doors open, only to find the gym empty.

“Hello?”

Your voice bounced off the walls, echoing back to you loudly. Looking around, there was nothing showing anyone was still there, except for Hinata’s bag sitting alone across the room.

Just as you were crossing the gym toward the bag he slipped through a door, eyes wide when he noticed you. It took you a second to process that he was in front of you now, you weren’t exactly sure what to say, but you weren’t happy, and he could tell.

“Shoyo.” You narrowed your eyes slightly, crossing your arms over your chest. The simple movement made him drop his eyes as if he were trying to hide from your intense glare.

“Hi, y/n.” His voice was quiet, much quieter than his normal self. Shifting his weight as he spoke, eyes fixed on his bag.

You didn’t say anything else for a moment, not sure if you should even talk. You couldn’t tell if you were more upset at the fact he knew what he did or not. It was one thing to simply forget to send a message, but him purposefully ignoring your texts pissed you off.

“Are you, um.. are you okay?” He asked, slowly looking you in the eyes, a small look of concern sitting on features.

“I think I should be asking you that, Sho.” Tilting your head slightly, you stared at him waiting for him to explain why he took so long.

“I’m okay. I was just about to come meet you.”

That answer made your blood hot, you could barely hold back what you wanted to say in response. Closing your eyes for a moment, you tried calming yourself, even if was only a little.

“Oh, so you did know I was here.” You spoke lowly, holding him in your stare once more. He stiffened when you started walking toward him, eyes wide as your gripped the collar of his shirt, pulling him to look up at you.

“Are you mad-“

“Don’t pretend to be innocent, Sho. I know you read my text I sent nearly an hour ago.” Your lips pulled back into a sneer when he dropped his eyes from yours once more. Letting go of his shirt you took a step back, reading the label on the door from where he came, it was the showers.

Stepping around him he didn’t take his eyes off the floor as you walked to the door and pulled it open.

“Remember what I said last time you did this?” You didn’t even have to say anything else as you stepped into the hallway, he followed behind you quietly. You knew he remembered, but he probably wouldn’t answer on his own.

Hinata usually got quiet when you were upset, not wanting to make anything worse. He really did try to be good; it was just sometimes he got a little distracted.

“I hope none of your teammates are here, Sho, or they’re going to hear you whining like a little bitch soon.” Your voice dripped with the anger you felt, but it was steady, scarily calm.

Once you were in the showers, you spun on your heels slowly. In an instant his back was pressed against the cold tile, a small shiver running down his back as your hot breath fanned over his lips.

He didn’t want to look at you, but for some reason he couldn’t tear his eyes from yours. Even as you swiftly pushed down his gym shorts, a venom-soaked saccharine smile pulling at your lips.

He wasn’t sure what to do, or where to put his hands. Was he allowed to touch you? He probably didn’t deserve it, but he wanted to. Especially as your fingers wrapped around his slowly hardening length.

If the look in your eyes wasn’t on the forefront of his thoughts, he would’ve felt the burn of his cheeks at your touch, and gaze.

“You’re already pretty hard, Sho. What were you thinking about that got you so worked up?” You asked sweetly, the tone of your voice harshly contrasting your actions as you gripped his jaw, pulling him closer to your face. “Answer me.”

“Um, I don’t know, you’re just so… I can’t explain it.”

You nearly laughed at his answer, it was almost pathetic how he couldn’t resist you when he disobeyed you. It was like he did it on purpose, just so he could have you like this.

“You don’t know.. well if that’s the case, why don’t you get yourself off, hm? A little slut like you doesn’t even deserve me to touch them. Not after you made me wait as long as I did.” You leaned closer to him, your hand tightening on his neck as you did. Letting your grip on his cock go, raising an eyebrow as you waited for him to listen to you.

Slowly, after shutting his eyes for a moment, he gripped himself. Stroking his cock loosely, the blush deepening on his cheeks as he did. He hated this, he knew he didn’t deserve it but he wanted it to be your hand, desperately wanted to feel your touch again. He listened though, saying anything back to you would only make it worse.

“Awe, look how cute you are. Is it embarrassing touching yourself in front of me?” He whined softly when you pushed closer to him, barely brushing against his length as he sped up his hand. Trying to mimic your expert movements, how you seemed to always make him melt as you touched him.

It was nothing like how you did it though, nothing close to the pleasure he felt when your pretty fingers were wrapped around his aching cock, pumping him just right. His eyes fluttered shut, not being able to look into yours anymore.

“No, no shutting your eyes. I want you to see me watch you pathetically touch yourself, I thought you could do it better, or am I the only one who can make you feel good like that, hm?” You pulled away from him when he opened his eyes again, watching as he changed his pace slowing down once more. Trying to find something that felt similar to what he was searching for.

Tears of frustration were starting to prick his eyes mixing with the embarrassment pooling in his chest. You weren’t surprised when they spilled over, slipping down his cheeks. The satisfied grin on your face only pushing his embarrassed crying further, needy whines slipping from his throat, but he kept stroking himself. Eyes screwing shut once more as he tried to stop the tears from coming.

You were about to say something else, maybe let him stop when you were interrupted. The loud creaking of the door opening sounded once more, followed by loud heavy footsteps.

Hinata’s eyes flew open, and he looked to you with wide eyes, you only smiled and moved closer to him, enough to shield him if needed.

“Hinata! You in here?” A loud voice called out, and you recognized it almost immediately. Not even giving him a chance to respond, Bokuto stepped around the corner. You moved away from Hinata again, giving Bokuto a clear view of him.

“Hey, Bo.” You smiled at the larger man as if there was nothing going on, his wide eyes flicked between you and Hinata several times, trying hard to not look at the redhead’s hand.

“Y/n, what are you doing in here?” Bokuto’s voice was quiet, nearly a whisper when he asked it.

“Teaching Hinata a lesson. You wouldn’t happen to know why he was here so late, would you?” You asked slowly, raising an eyebrow when Bokuto shook his head rapidly, you definitely didn’t believe him. Especially with the blush that spread across his cheeks. “Hm, well you’re free to stay if you want. I’m sure Hinata wouldn’t mind, would you baby?”

Hinata let out a shaky breath, like he had been holding it in since Bokuto arrived. Forcing himself to look at the tall man, barely meeting his eyes. Shaking his head, he didn’t quite trust his voice yet, not with the obvious tent growing in Bokuto’s shorts.

Seeing Hinata with his head tilted against the tile, tears spilling down his cheeks as he gripped his cock, it was something he thought he’d never see. Bokuto could hardly look at you now, there was an edge in the tone of your voice he’d never heard before, it scared him slightly.

Raking your eyes down Hinata’s form, you shook your head slightly, catching his attention once more.

“I didn’t tell you to stop, Shoyo. Show Bokuto just how much of a slut you are, and maybe I’ll think about touching you myself, okay?”

tags: @bummie @beelziee @bunny-xoxo​ @ultimate-astridwriting

[hivequest]

Taking a Risk » Mallek Adalov/Reader

Wordcount: 2.3k words

Warnings: Swearing, fluff, stressed out reader, chillboy Mallek. TYping quirk only used when texting cause I could not be bothered lmao Originally posted on AO3

A/N: One of my favorite things that I’ve written, ever. I love Mallek and he’s for sure one of my favorite Friendsim characters. When I wrote this I was really feeling those Quarantine Woes

You didn't know what you were doing here. You felt out of place in the worst possible ways. It was a weird, squidgy feeling like stepping on wet grass. But not like the fun kind where you were running around in a sprinkler on a hot-as-balls summer day. No, this was the bad kind of wet grass that you stepped on without knowing it was wet. Why weren't you wearing shoes?

This analogy is stupid. The point is, you're feeling bummed out.

And what better way to not have to deal with that than hang out with someone you knew wouldn't push you into talking about all the ways crashing on this planet sucked! The point is, you're on your way to see Mallek. Mallek is absolutely the kind of friend who can tell when you just need to sit down and veg out. You had been so caught up in everyone else's bullshit that you weren't looking after your own damn self. So now you were doing that.

All it took was a quick text, asking Mallek if he had any company. He texted back only a moment later with a no, obviously not. You asked him if he wanted any. Not really. You ask him if you can come over anyway. Obviously.

You smiled at the palmhusk in your, well, palm. You could already feel the chill vibes of your hacker friend. Friend? Was that the right word for it? You didn't know anymore. When you first met there were definitely some sparks there. You could still feel them now and it made weird butterflies flutter around in your stomach. When you slapped his phone out of his hand and he sent you ass over applecart into the slimy depths of sewer water and he saved you, tits out and all.

You shook off the weird wistful feeling of maybe possibly crossing the friendship barrier and told him you'd walk to his hive. You'd been moping in some bookhive, not your usual hang-out spot with Tagora or Tyzias. This was some upper caste bookhive with purple bloods and some indigos and definitely not where you were welcome if the looks you were getting were any indication. They ranged from snooty to downright murderous. Yeesh.

Your phone -palmhusk, stupid troll names- beeped again. You got another text from him and those cheery fucking butterflies were back. God, you had it bad.

yeah were not doing that lmao;

im not going to let my robobuddy walk out in the sun

do you even know what time of day it =

just stay put ive already got your location ill pick you up;

And like a good little friendsimp. You park your ass on a chair and wait. You hadn't released your moping had taken up most of the night. But with the quick look around, yeah, no, this place was nearly empty by now. Just some older bluebloods trying to cram before their Ordeals and get shipped off-planet. Again: Yeesh.

You kept your ears open for the telltale sound of Mallek's limo. It was a sound you were getting used to these days. He always seemed ready to drop whatever coding shit he was working on to come to see you. You tried not to think too hard on what that might mean. No need to get your hopes up now. It's probably just your bad mood making you imagine some context where there's nothing. Yeah.

Damn, that shit hurted.

Just as you were about to add that to the reasons you were considering just screaming your lungs out who cares whose listening? you heard the wonderfully familiar sound of an approaching elongated scuttlebuggy. If that wasn't enough of a clue as to who the ride was for the quiet of the bookhive was very abruptly disturbed by a series of rhythmic beeps.

Holy shit was that the Tetris theme?

You shoved your palmhusk into your hoodie pocket and yanked the hood over your head. Even if the sun was only out a little bit you didn't want it anywhere near your freshly healed skin. You had no kind cowgirl to nurse you back to health right now if you got your asscheeks baked by the flaming death orb. You peeked your head out and even with the blinding light of Alternia's suns you could Mallek had opened the door and was waiting for you.

Aw. No, shit. You're in a bad mood don't get all heart eyes at him. Don't make it weird.

You took a few steps back into the bookhive, ready to make a run for it. You turn to a sitting indigoblood, who is just staring at you disdainfully for keeping the door open. You give her a two-fingered salute. Godspeed young cosmonaut. She gives you a one-fingered salute. Close the door you insufferable bulgebiter. Fair.

Taking a running start, you book it out into the heat of the Alternian sun and dive for the open car door. It's then that you realize he's halfway parked on the sidewalk to lessen the amount of time you'd have to spend in the sun. Aw. That also means that you came barreling like a cannonball at something that was like two feet out of the door. FUck.

Your face meets carpet and you can already feel the rugburn starting to set in. You hear a startled wheezy laugh from above you, a sound you know better than anyone else on this planet. You smile. It's not like you had any dignity to begin with.

You say hello to him as you peel yourself off of the floor of his car.

"Hey, there robobuddy. You stuck the landing this time," He smiles down at you as he reaches over you to shut the door, closing the space out from natural light and leaving you both lit by his colorful LEDs. You shrug and tell him you've been getting a lot of practice landing on your face these days. The look he gives you is still smiling but there's some level of disbelief at the dumbassery that is your whole existence.

"I know you can get yourself into it. Nothing too bad this time, though, right? No drones or broken bones?" He sounds concerned which is nice but he doesn't drown you with his concern. He leans back on the bench of his limo, keeping an eye on you as the vehicle begins to move on its own. You've been staying out of big messes but the little messes are starting to mess with you. He makes a sound of understanding the sounds as it comes from deep in his chest. Whoa. "Believe me, I've been there. Glad you're not cracking under it though."

He smiles and you can see his little fang and you can feel your heart melt a little. And also you're getting a bit teary-eyed and now Mallek looks alarmed. Shit. You try to quickly explain that you're fine, just, alien allergies am I right? He must be using some new air freshener to mask the musty smell of his limo. Since doesn't use it enough. Ha ha?

He isn't buying it.

With a rare show of cerulean prowess, he lifts you up off of the shitty car rug and sets you on the seat beside him. He feels uncomfortable and you can tell. Ah, goddammit you made it weird. You didn't mean to. Fuck. Fuck now you're feeling even worse. You thought you were starting to balance out. You're with Mallek now, shouldn't everything start to quiet down like it always does? Fuck. He doesn't say anything at first, just leans back against the seat and stretches his arms across it, letting you lean on him if you choose to.

...You choose to.

Your head finds itself somewhere between his shoulder and his collarbone, and you just. Shove your face there. Then scream.

To his credit, Mallek doesn't even flinch. He doesn't wince or shy away from you as you let out every bit of anger, sadness, and frustration out against his sweater. He just sits quietly, staring straight at the blacked-out windshield. You get the feeling he's needed to do this more than once.

Screw this planet. Screw everything about it that makes all of your friends suffer. Why can't you just get them away from all this bullshit?! Why do you have to deal with everyone's bullshit! You love them, you do but holy fuck they're looking to you like you can undo all the damage this place has done to them when you've got literally no god damn idea what's happening at any point ever!

And then, just like that, it fades into the background. Your throat hurts. Your head hurts and you think you might be crying. But it feels lighter. Better now that you've gotten some of that aggression out. You aren't like the trolls on Alternia. You can't kill people when you experience an Emotion™. But that doesn't mean you don't get pent up with rage.

Mallek realizes that now. He lets out a breath he didn't realize he was holding and his left hand slowly moves down from the back of the seat the rest against your back. His thumb brushes against your back, the claw drawing little patterns against the fabric of your sweater. His sweater. He tries not to think his sign your chest. This isn't the time.

"Feeling any better?" He asks and you don't know how to answer. You kinda don't want to. But you nod anyways, and you feel some tension leave his body. You knew he was worried about you. You apologize for making him witness your meltdown but he just makes another deep-chested hum. "Nothing to apologize for. I got the feeling you weren't feeling great. I could tell from the texts, you didn't use nearly enough ugly emojis."

You scoff and smack a hand against his chest and once again you hear that wonderful laugh from him. Hey! Your purrbeast emojis are adorable, thank you very much! And you'll not hear another word of it or else you'll send him pictures of rocks and rocks exclusively. No more memes.

"Jokes on you I'm into that shit." You laugh and thump your head against his collarbone. You thank him for being with you when were needed it. And picking you up to make sure you didn't deal with it alone. You don't want to make it weird but...yeah.

He doesn't respond this time, just letting you both enjoy the silence and the comforting sound of the engine. You should almost be at Mallek's apartment by now. It's as you're settling in for the last bit of the drive that you notice that the limo isn't moving. And hasn't been for a while. Your head pops up in confusion and the little GPS display on the back of one of the seats says... yep.

You're already at Mallek's.

But then why is the engine still on? That can't be good for the environment. Do these things even run on gas or is it bugs? Bug gas? Gross.

You notice then that the rumbling is coming from behind you. Like. From where Mallek is sitting. He doesn't look away when you turn to him, just kind of tilting his head to the side with a little bit of a cerulean hue to his cheeks. Oh. Oh, the sound is coming from him. He's purring. That's.

That's adorable.

You feel yourself soften even more when he lifts his arms, silently offering a hug if you want it. Is this platonic? Is this more? You've never had too much trouble identifying what people wanted from you. (Debatable.) If was overtly flushed you could shut it down or divert it to something very much friends only. (Like your every exchange with Zebruh.) But did you even want to do that to your hackerman? You could feel yourself screaming, no, absolutely not. But at the same time, you didn't want things to change. You didn't want to make his issues any worse than they already were. He didn't have too much longer on the planet and you knew it would tear him apart.

But then he turned those blue eyes to you. He looked just as unsure as you were but he was willing to take the risk. He shoved himself so far out of his comfort zone for you and was asking you to be selfish. To want something for yourself and do something for yourself. Not put him or anyone else's wants first. Just your own. And so you did.

You crawled up into his lap, pressed yourself as close to him as you could and clung to him. His arms didn't hesitate to wrap around you and you could feel a shuddering breath from above you.

"We don't have to put a label on this... not yet. Or ever. Either way is chill with me. I just... yeah." He gave up with a little shrug of his shoulders but you knew what he meant. Unless you could find a way to fight fate he was going to go off-world. He was going to leave you and you doubted you'd be able to go with him. You'd probably get gored by a drone for even trying.

But even if it was just for now, just for a moment, you were going to take it. You were going to let yourself have something, have someone who would care for you no matter how long or short your time was. You'd take it. You had stomached some of the most horrible things on this planet but Mallek had always been a constant. And you got the feeling he thought the same way about you.

So, you'd take it. Whatever comes next, you'd take it. You listened to the sound of his purring, in no hurry to move to get inside the apartment. Mallek felt the same.

You exhaled.

You would be okay.

[hotchseyebrows]

it's a matter of seeing

a derek morgan x penelope garcia fic

a/n: hello again beloveds !!! today i present to you Another derek and penelope are kissing for the first time fic. what can i say, it's simply the best. thank you as always to the spectacular @blkantigone for being my supportive and helpful first reader and editor, love youuu! thank all of you for reading (im getting faster between uploads, have you noticed?)

title is from emily l. by marguerite duras. full line is "I don't know if love's a feeling. Sometimes I think it's a matter of seeing. Seeing you."

rating/warnings: gen audiences :) two vague allusions to sex but nothing even close to explicit, its more just in the way it exists in the background and derek is injured but it's superbly minor

read it here on ao3!

Derek steps closer to Penelope. “You had to see me. With your own eyes.”

Penelope rolls her eyes. “Yes, silly goose, that’s the usual way of seeing.”

-

Derek gets hurt on a case, and Penelope worries. He's fine, but she still worries.

word count: 2028

Derek glances at the time on his phone. Almost midnight, though it could be closer to 4 a.m. for how tired the team is tonight. A long case in Colorado kept them away from home for almost two weeks, and all Derek wants is to pet his dog and sleep in his own bed.

“Could this elevator ride be any slower?” Emily groans from where she’s leaning on the wall behind him.

“You know, Prentiss, I could have just gotten a late night taxi or grabbed one of the last trains.” Spencer is rocking back and forth on his heels next to her, a yawn growing on his lips. 

“Nuh uh, kid, I’m getting you home whether you like it or not. I just wish you didn’t need that notebook from your desk tonight.”

“Sorry,” Spencer says, cringing slightly. Derek looks back to see Emily nudge his shoulder with a fond grin. Spencer’s shoulders relax.

“Why are you coming up, Hotch?” Derek asks the man in the opposite corner from Emily.

“Files.” Hotch stays facing the elevator door, only glancing at Derek.

“No way are you planning on staying here and working tonight– Hotch. We’ve been gone for two weeks–” (“Almost two weeks,” says Spencer. Derek waves him off.) “– you should be going home.”

“I’m just grabbing a few things. I’ll get back on this elevator with you.” Hotch glances at the time on his own phone then, unlocking it to open a text message from Jess. Derek sees a picture of smiling Jack for a split second before he looks away. “Jess is already expecting me.”

Derek hums in acknowledgement. He rolls his shoulder as the doors open and they walk towards the bullpen together.

“Shoulder still hurting, Morgan?” Emily asks. The day before they came home, one of the unsubs got the jump on Derek, tackling him to the ground. Emily easily subdued him, but Derek landed funny on a wayward pipe. His shoulder has been bothering him ever since. He nods in response.

“I’ll be fine.” Emily scoffs at him, but says nothing. He will. Eventually.

Spencer holds open the door for Derek. “Here, Morgan. So you don’t aggravate your injury.”

“Hilarious. Ha ha. When’s the stand-up tour? Have you been moonlighting at comedy clubs, pretty boy?”

Spencer sticks his tongue out at him. He quickly pulls it back in his mouth when he catches Hotch looking at him. To their surprise, Hotch cracks a small smile. “Reid has a point, Morgan.” Emily lets out a laugh that is more a cackle than anything.

“Evil. You’re all evil.” He walks through the held open door anyway.

Most of the desk lamps are off, the bullpen empty this late. But his chair is spinning slightly and his light is on. A mop of blonde hair, today a mess of curls with a large sparkly flower pinned at the top, bounces as the chair spins.

“Baby girl, what are you doing here?” Penelope spins to face him, a brilliant smile flashing onto her face immediately. “It’s late. You could have gone home hours ago.”

“Where’s JJ and Rossi?” 

“Already in their cars on the way home. We all needed something from up here first.” She’s standing now, and he steps in front of her. “Don’t avoid my question, Mama,” he says, lightly tapping the tip of her nose.

Her smile falters, worry breaking through. “You got hurt.” Her eyebrows crease as she looks him over.

Derek raises both eyebrows. “Yea, but I’m okay. A little injury.”

The crease does not go away. “You got hurt. I don’t like when you get hurt.” He uses his non injured arm to pull her in for a hug. She wraps him in her arms immediately, her face pressing against his chest. The usual private shiver dances down his spine at the feeling. He rubs a small circle on the middle on her back as the tension bleeds out of her.

“See, baby girl? I’m fine.” Penelope picks up her head and looks at him. “Heart’s still beating. Blood’s still pumping. It’s just a little booboo.” She laughs at his word choice. “I’m okay. Promise.”

“You’re gonna rest at home? Ice it, or heating pad it up, or whatever you need?” He nods. “And you’ll call me if you need my help?”

“I promise.” She pops on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. “You’re cute when you’re worried.”

Penelope tilts her head back and laughs. “I’m always cute, Derek Morgan. Don’t you forget it.” She never looks more beautiful than when she laughs. 

“I won’t,” he says, moving his arm to her waist and walking them both to his desk. Spencer is closing his bag at his desk while Emily leans back in his chair, eyes closed.

“Okay, I’m ready,” says Spencer, nudging the chair with his foot. Emily blinks her eyes open, sitting up. “And I can drive, Emily, you’re more tired than I am.” She opens her mouth to argue, but a yawn comes out instead. She hands Spencer the keys without a word.

“Why are you here, Garcia?” Emily asks.

“Had to see my sweet love in person as soon as you got home.” Derek’s heart flips in his chest. “I worry,” she says simply. Emily nods, giving Derek a long look.

Hotch appears at the top of the stairs next to his office. “I’m leaving.” The unsaid addition of that means you are too rings out from the eyebrow heavy look he gives them all.

Derek grabs the file he needs and a novel his sister sent him from his desk drawer quickly. “Come on baby girl, I’ll walk you out.”

“My very own Prince Charming,” she says as she loops her arm through his.

Spencer starts telling Emily about a Russian film festival coming up in a few weeks as they lead the way to the door. Hotch is close behind, silent but listening. Penelope pulls on Derek a little and they follow. 

She puts her head on his shoulder. On reflex, he kisses the top of her head. Not for the first time, he thinks about how easy it is for her to slot into place in his life. She just fits, no matter where he is or what he’s doing. There she is, a voice on the phone or the person spinning in his desk chair in the middle of the night solely because she needs to see him in person.

He falters as they walk through the glass doors. Penelope only makes it a few steps before she’s looking back at where he’s frozen, mind whirring. Emily is pressing the button to the elevator ahead of them. “Der?” Penelope asks.

“Why are you here?”

She tilts her head. “I told you. I worry.”

“You could have called Penelope. You did call, we talked on the plane.”

Now she blushes. She never blushes. “I had– I had to see for myself. I didn’t want to wait until Monday.”

A realization washes over Derek. “You had to see,” he repeats, a smile growing on his face.

She sways a little on her feet. “Yes, I said that.” The trio at the elevator notices them lingering by the doors, but Hotch stops Spencer from calling out with a knuckle brush to the forearm.

Derek steps closer to Penelope. “You had to see me. With your own eyes.”

Penelope rolls her eyes. “Yes, silly goose, that’s the usual way of seeing.” Derek takes another step, now only an arm’s length away. 

“It’s midnight on a Saturday. And you waited for me here, alone.”

She nods.

“Even though we talked today and you know that I’m okay, that I’ve had worse injuries.”

She nods again.

“Penelope,” he says, voice barely a whisper. He steps impossibly closer. “Why are you here?”

A look of fear settles on Penelope’s face. “Derek–”

“No, it’s alright!” He grabs her hand. “I just need you to say it.”

She softens, something like hope lighting up her eyes. “If you need me to say it, then you already know.”

He releases a loud laugh– the kind of joyous sound that comes unbidden from the bottom of the stomach. Leaning forward, he rests their foreheads together, watching her reaction. When she smiles, he knows for sure. “Yea I do,” he says.

She leans in across the tiny distance between them and presses their lips together. Derek forgets about the lingering ache in his shoulder in favor of this new feeling. He swings an arm around her waist and straightens up, pulling her flush against him. She wraps her arms around his neck, a soft sound humming against his lips. He’s about to slip his tongue into her mouth and carry her off to an empty office when someone clears their throat from across the room.

Penelope pulls back first, automatically hiding her face in Derek’s neck. Emily is hiding a smile behind her hand. Hotch’s eyebrows are raised slightly, the ghost of a smile around his eyes. Spencer makes no attempt to hide his glee, fingers tapping together happily. Derek grins at them. “Can I help you three?”

“Just thought you’d want to carry on somewhere else. And the elevator is here.” Sure enough, Emily has a foot in the elevator door. She shows him her full grin this time. “Not that we weren’t having fun watching the show.” 

He scoffs. “Next time, we’re charging a ticket price.” Penelope giggles.

“Next time?” she whispers.

He nods. “If you want.”

“Yes! Yes. I want. Very much so.” He smiles, a full eye crinkle 1000 watt smile, and interlocks their fingers to lead her to the elevator. She slots in right at his side, putting her head back on his shoulder. 

They stay that way the whole way down and keep their hands together as they walk to the parking lot. Emily makes kissy faces as she and Spencer get into her car. Spencer waves happily. Hotch gives them a soft smile before he disappears around a corner.

Derek pulls her in for another kiss right next to Esther. Just because he can. “Follow me home?” he mutters against her lips. “We don’t have to… tonight. Next time. But I’ll make breakfast.”

She traces a spiral on his upper arm. “Okay. It’s a date.” He kisses the tip of her nose just to hear her giggle.

She gives him one more kiss before gently shoving him in the direction of his car. “The faster you get to your car, the faster we get home.” He blows her a kiss before jogging to where he parked two weeks ago. She catches it and puts it right over her heart.

The streets are almost empty as they drive, and Derek keeps pulling up next to her at stoplights to ask if she comes here often or if she wants to race. By the time they arrive at Derek’s apartment building, it’s almost one a.m. and they are both dead on their feet. Still, they stop to kiss in front of his elevator. They kiss again just inside of his front door and again when he hands her an old shirt to wear to bed. He has the urge to pinch his arm, just to double check that he’s not still asleep on the plane. But no, there she is, brushing her teeth in his bathroom with a spare toothbrush. He's never felt this kind of peace with someone else in his space. She has toothpaste on the corner of her mouth and her eyes are bloodshot from exhaustion. I love you, he thinks.

“What?” she asks. “You’re staring.”

Derek hums, wrapping an arm around her waist. "Do you blame me?" He grabs a tissue and blots away the toothpaste. It's a slight deflection, but it's not the moment for what he's really thinking. She scrunches her nose and smiles.

"No. You have good taste."

"Damn right I do, baby girl. The best taste." 

They don’t kiss much when they lay in Derek’s bed, too tired to do much more than cuddle up together and turn off the lights. But Derek doesn’t mind. He’s already thinking about breakfast.