#like yeah my grades arent too bad but im not getting all A’s so i probably wont get accepted to programs

[hecksupremechips]

Honestly though I think it’s really a bad sign when I look at Shin Tsukimi and literally feel like he’s a self insert 😩

[gales-boyfriend]

dang i am not gonna be able to survive nursing school :/

[trainingdummyrabbit]

okaaaaaay. ranking the library's floors based on how nice it would be to take a nap there. graded by ambiance and comfort. trying not to let too many of my own biases shine through but also no promises. im sleepy. ok 👍

> Lobby/Halls: im counting it because itd be funny. the ambiance is not unlike a hotel hallway; kind of really unsettling in its uniformity and undefinedness, but it Does make you sleepy if youre brave enough to risk it. feels like there'd be a chaser monster in there. and there is, if you count angela, i guess. 5/10 ambience. im pretty sure it is like 60-70% stairs if you look at it, which is deeply funny. where do the stairs go. i guess the better question is where Don't the stairs go. there are also no chairs or Anything; just bookshelves and lamps. its pretty clear you arent supposed to be in there long. dim lighting's pretty nice at least. 3/10 comfort. VERDICT: 4/10. At least it's got presentation.

> Floor of General Works: the vibe is pretty nice, if you can get past feeling like a tree on a prairie. a hawk could swoop in and snatch you or something. the towers of books could be kinda comforting for the right people, though. 4/10 ambiance. this is books. 3/10 comfort. VERDICT: 3.5/10. Don't Fall Off.

> Floor of History: its pretty busy, but the kind of busy where it just kinda turns into comforting background noise. its like the equivalent of having on cafe noises to study or sleep to. less of a "lulling you to sleep" sort of deal and more of a "i am so tired i could literally pass out sitting up." and then you do. might be a little much, but if you can find a nice corner somewhere it might be refreshing. nice little power nap. 7/10 ambiance. not Really the most conducive to taking a nap physically-- best you've got is facedown on the desk. which, honestly, isnt too bad. theyre nice desks. could make yourself a little hidey hole with the books sitting around. just be careful not to let anyone spot you. 7/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7/10. Respectably cozy for a quick pick-me-up.

> Floor of Technological Sciences: the light from the windows is probably jarring as hell, but away from that is pretty nice honestly. a bit uniform for my own liking, but the dim light looks like it'd do wonders. cant imagine how anyone doesn't already get sleepy working in there. 7/10 ambiance. the geaaaarrrsssss.... good luck getting any actual sleep with That nonsense going on 24/7. also i dont think theres a Single non-90 degree angle in the entire floor besides the gears, (which you Really shouldnt be sleeping near,) which i cant imagine does anyone's backs any favors. not a single good desk in sight beyond yesods, and i dont think hed take kindly to sharing this way. also that is the most uncomfortable looking couch i have ever seen. 2/10 comfort. VERDICT: 4.5/10. Almost, buddy. Bring your own pillow. And earplugs.

> Floor of Literature: the little ceiling lights are absolutely Lovely. could argue for it being too bright, but honestly that's an easy fix. its comfy in the way a school library is-- honestly one of the more inviting floors to be on. its practically Begging for a nap tbh. very neat and comfortable. 8/10 ambiance. girl how small is that table???? even with leniency for art style with the size, the chair backs barely reach th edge of the table. looks like youd be ppppretty squished sleeping there. doesn't look like theres many other notable spots to sneak your way into either, so its the table or the floor. one way or another you are waking up as if youve been hit by a truck. 3/10 comfort. VERDICT: 5.5/10. Very polite and comfy, but oh Man is that gonna mess you up later.

> Floor of Art: YEAH BABEY!!!!! very dim but with several soft light sources, the loose and comfortable feel of the place-- this is what its all about honestly. the paintings and such are a nice touch as well. chances are, no ones gonna really bat an eye if they catch you asleep here. it just feels like the place for it. the natural look must be very nice after everything, too. 9/10 ambiance. those floorboards are Going to kill you. cant imagine trying to walk in there without tripping. not a lot of obvious places to set up, but if youre feeling brave you can probably nest up in a pile of books somewhere. on the other hand, theres probably all sorts of little spaces and nooks to tuck into if youre crafty. as someone who would enjoy sleeping in a cabinet, can approve. 6/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7.5/10. He gets a 10/10 in MY heart. Taking that back pain like a CHAMP.

> Floor of Natural Sciences: the same kind of comfort as an old ladys guest room. aka i Wish i could take a nap there. only caveat is the blinding light coming in from pretty much everywhere. its like trying to sleep with an open curtain, but like... all the time. looks like itd smell nice in there, at least. 7/10 ambiance. has actually comfy-looking chairs! seems like thered be a few places you could manage to tuck into comfortably in a corner someplace with a cushion or something. also one of (maybe the only?) floors that actually has carpeting! so no getting woken up by footsteps, or having to sleep on floorboards. 7/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7/10. Probably like sleeping in a sunbeam. Equally disorienting when Tiph inevitably gets at you for slacking off.

> Floor of Language: its kinda scruffy looking, but if youre not bothered by that it looks like it might be pretty comforting actually. i wont explain. lightings pretty nice as long as youre not looking directly out the window. soundscape might not be horrible, its a bit of a coinflip with the industrial look though. caveat? cigarette smoke... 7/10 ambiance. Comfy! Looking! COUCH!!! you Are passing out on that thing whether you want to or not. also you could probably have a nice time tucking up against the windowsill if you can handle the brightness. might even be warm. im kinda surprised actually. 8/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7.5/10. I could swear I've fallen asleep here before. Minus the um. Lava. But you get what I mean.

> Floor of Social Sciences: this place looks like a memory. this is the type of sleep youd get where youre briefly kinda disoriented on where you are for a while. ive gotta imagine the water sounds pretty nice too. and the coffee smells! can you imagine?? theres probably all sorts of small talk going on in the background, just a few people stopping by here and there to exchange pleasantries over a drink. i gotta stop here, i Will just keep going. 10/10 ambiance. i need to bump this up at least a little due to the theme alone. im listening while writing these and the sheer wave of peace it always brings is indescribable. howeverrrrr... return of The Couch. you Cannot convince me that thing is made of any sort of remotely soft material. at least its got pillows. on the other hand, you get good windowsill access (REALLY good windowsill too,) AND bar access. must be nice to find a quiet corner in, too. 8/10 comfort. VERDICT: 9/10. Is anyone honestly surprised. (But still, jeez dude.)

> Floor of Philosophy: the dim lighting AND the ceiling stars??? dude... its a bit quiet, but quiet in the way a classroom is after-hours. a silent sort of welcoming. if youre able, Nothing is going to bother you in there. this is where you go to Rest. 9/10 ambiance. girl there is NOWHERE to sleep. other than like the table. also is that just... water? on the floor? i appreciate the aesthetic deeply, but um. i dont think thats very nap conducive. the floor is probably wood but it looks almost like stone with how its shaped. cant imagine your back would thank you after that one. table's not too bad at least. 6/10 comfort. VERDICT: 7.5/10. The equivalent of passing out in a therapist's office. Hope you're ready for an in-depth personal conversation when you wake up.

> Floor of Religion: this looks like a principals office. cant shake the feeling of mild yet stern disapproval coming from this place. on the other hand, it Does feel Very secure. id imagine thered be at least faint clock ticking-- That has to be pretty nice. if youre the right person, i guess. the occasional ceiling light is pretty nice, but its already pretty bright in there. youll fall asleep in here and either feel like no time has passed at all after several hours or feel like its been an eternity after 5 minutes. no in-between. 5/10 ambiance. there is Nowhere to Sleep. maybe the stairs if youre cool with having to sleep against the railing, but also that Is a tripping hazard, and nobody likes a tripping hazard. has a similar problem to yesods floor, in that everything is Very straight-laced and proper, meaning there is like... nowhere comfortable to sit. other than like one desk and a table or two maybe. 3/10 comfort. VERDICT: 4/10. I'd say you rank better in my heart, but this is honestly about as expected. in conclusion: chesed's floor once again remaining the people's favorite. if you need me ill be tucked into a cubby at netzie's. come get me in like 3 hours or so, i will almost Certainly get stuck up there. ok 👍

[gwiyeounsonyeon]

Everyone(Neuro divergent Writers)

i wanted to share some tips that really helped me with my writers block so hopefully they help someone else who is like me. for the longest time i thought i just forgot how to write but i didn't and i get to see myself improving every day.

this is a pretty long post, its entirely word vomit and i go on a little spiel at the end about ai

Medication.

The biggest and most unexpected thing that helped me was getting medicated for my ADHD. Before taking Adderall, i never thought that my ADHD might be why i was struggling so hard to write and it was the same with everyone else too. Id get family hovering over my shoulder every time i came to them to express my fears about my rapidly declining literacy and writing skill, all saying that if I'm struggling that bad i just need to eat better or go on a walk or get some sunshine, like my brain works like everyone else's.

I was scared at first because id been on Adderall before and it just made me miserable but I'm super determined to continue writing and when i tried it, things started getting better. i found myself actually enjoying my writing process and getting excited to wake up. I'd sit at my desk and write for hours, yeah it would take me a few hours to just write a thousand words but that didn't matter because i was writing.

Changing What I Write On.

I write most of my stuff in google docs, sometimes i dabble with notion but there's too much to customize and i just get carried away. i was reading articles to help improve my basic writing skills because i retained absolutely nothing from school besides one wale fact i learned in science in like grade six and the entire bill nye song.

if you write on a computer or phone, a lot of the times you cant think of something might be because of the blank screen and the flashing cursor. i can come up with a thousand speculations as to why but i know that trying to write on a notebook sometimes makes things go smoother. i know its a hassle transferring that but for lazy writers who don't like reading through their work its actually really helpful for editing.

Changing Where I Write

One of the biggest reasons i gave up on writing was while in school i was a fountain of ideas, constantly writing in my notebook and not paying attention to the teachers.

this is probably the weirdest one but it worked for me. usually i try to find something on youtube like an informative video or a nature documentary, hate all you want but recently i found that asmr works too. find things where there isnt a lot of stuff happening, slow talkers, David Attenborough, one of those roleplay asmr's. hide the video, especially if you have adhd. i found that when i try writing in scilence, i get more bored and overstimulated, and when i write with music too often i get overstimulated. putting on videos like these are a great middle man, its not quiet and the sounds arent too high pitched or repetitive.

ill leave you with a few of the channels i like to use.

penguinz0

theweeklyslap

[ASMR]nara_나라 shes a korean youtuber, i like putting their k-pop idol make up roleplays on. they speak korean and its really nice to put on in the background when im brainstorming ideas.

Tingting ASMR another really good youtuber, they make a lot of roleplay videos, some of my favorites are the videos with the wigs. they have a wide variety of videos so its easy to jut click play all and not get overstimulated or annoyed.

Stimuli

things like pressure or fidget toys. i absolutely can not wright unless i have my headphones on, it doesnt matter what i try or if i do something else that usually works, unless i have my headphones i cant do anything.

i personally like hyperX cloud II, i have the wireless ones. theyre light and they have a long lasting battery. theyre on the more expensive side so i apologize but they are worth every penny.

i also sort of like MOVSSOU but i dont use them a lot, they're a Bluetooth headset with a noise cancelling feature that i like to have when i sleep, but i like the pressure, i just dont like the roundness the over ear speakers have. these are still a little expensive but not as bad as the other ones.

i also found that wearing pants inhibits my writing process, as weird as it sounds, its really comfortable to just lounge and write in my underwear.

i know its different for everybody but for neuro divergent people the little things matter the most. pay attention to what you do when you wright; what time of day do you usually write in, where do you write at, what are you wearing, what are you looking at, did you eat, did you shower before. if you need to write these things down and experiment; try writing at a different time, try writing in different clothes or in no clothes. don't be embarrassed about what helps you, as long as you're not hurting yourself or other people it should be completely fine.

Drafts

like a complete moron i forgot about drafting. i didn't really forget, it just seemed pointless, i wasn't writing much so what's the point.

there is a point and its a life changer.

for some people writing is hard or it can become a burden or a chore, especially for people who share their works because theres a lot of pressure. you can say you dont care and you might not but you have to admit its a little daunting trying to figure out if your sentence is legible or not.

next time you write, i want you to stop thinking about everything else. all that matters right now is getting your thoughts on the page, fuck grammar, fuck spelling, it doesnt matter.

how do you write? do you picture the scenario? to the words just come to you? do that. if you picture things when you write just sit back and watch it like a movie, type what you see. don't worry about realism, don't worry whether or not your character has four limbs. just write what comes into your head and when your done take a break. get up and walk around, drink water, eat a snack, move away from your computer or notebook or whatever else and take a breather. when you come back read it out loud, shout it, murmur it, it doesn't matter. edit as you go, if something doesn't sound right rewrite it, if you stumble over your words try to simplify your sentence.

outside help

i really struggle with this because i dont have anyone im confident in sharing this stuff with but if you do ask for help proofreading.

if you're like me and you don't try ai. don't rely on it to do everything for you, that's lazy and youre not really writing.

use it to help simplify your run on sentences or help with grammar, if theres a sentence in your story that needs to be changed but youre blanking get an ai to help rework it.

especially if you struggle with ideas and need help, roleplaying with bots is also a good way to help get ideas organized and help visualize a situation. i know a while ago when i was struggling with feeling pressured and the stress that i felt like i was carrying the brunt of everything and i used character ai to help me visualize ideas and work out storylines i had no idea how to put into words or continue.

especially in areas where im really weak in, like plots and story pllans, ai is really good to help get your jumbled ideas out when you dont have another person to rely on for assistance. not only that but their messages are concise and organized and its less overwhelming sorting through the information.

ive been using

Creative_WritingsE on poe.ai to help me write the story guide and plot lines for the sanji fic im working on.

and i just started playing around with sudowrite to help me edit my drafts and help with my awful grammar and punctuation.

but please remember to be conscious when using ai, if its for writing or drawing. people work hard to develop these skills and get to where they are today and when people come along calling themselves artists or authors when all they did was pay for a program and type a few words into a box that most likely stole work from other people, it feels degrading.

imagine you're in school and you were assigned a project that you are really passionate about and you work really hard on, pouring over it tirelessly. not just for the grade but because its something you genuinely like and it makes you happy. then when you go into school the next day you find out one of your classmates snuck photos of your project and all they did was change how it looked but nothing else and they get the recognition for it. it feels shitty and honestly it takes the joy out of doing the thing you love.

[justablah56]

oh god hi. gothweebcleats here again. i’m finally catching up to the new episodes (still only on 47!! i’m dragging my partner through them) but dear god

(also using canon pronouns rn im a lil put of it LAWL) (also also warning possible sad ahead)

honestly i loved LOVED!!! freddie whipping out taylor’s emotions in hell or high father. like. yeah taylor’s a good fun kid he takes very little seriously and he likes himself and that makes for a charismatic sorta dude that seems like he doesn’t really think much. but god no this kid since day one has been wanting his dad he’s so curious he can barely contain it ‘there’s an empty spot waiting for you where are you’ he loves his mom so so much and she will never be a replacement she will never fill that hole. dad where are you. dad there you are and my first impression of you is terrifying. all i hear is fighting and my friend and i need to be safe we need to get out. my friend left himself behind for you and youre telling me to leave him forever? dude that sucks. no wonder you werent around. i wish i didn’t remember you anymore and that there was a different you here taking care of me

and also thinking abt lincoln. link who loves his dads more than anything. link who thinks knows how important his dads are to his wellbeing, that he wont be safe if his dads arent there. link who grew up and learned his fathers were people too. link growing up and seeing his dad’s mistake firsthand link growing up and seeing that he has to fix his dad’s problem. link knowing his dad cares for him link knowing his dad doesn’t care for him correctly (don’t get me started on grant) link knowing his dad will always love him link knowing his dad will never love him enough.

ykw we’re gonna do the other two as well (as i get closer to current episodes i get Immensely Sadder)

terri marlowe grows up without a dad (there’s an empty spot in my brain; i don’t remember anything before first grade…). a man comes by when she’s 12 and asks for money (we have the same nose (?!) ). her mom yells him out of the house (she never yells, what’s going on??) and they leave the state three weeks later (mom where are we going? … mom??). scary starts at a new middle school somewhere in california (i grew up in illinois). she joins the soccer team (they’re nice enough). her mom gets a boyfriend (ew) and apparently he has the same name as her (double ew!!!). scary wakes up the next morning clinging to a man she doesn’t remember for the sake of hurting a man right in front of her (i want to be mean). she does not spit vitriol during dinner (this chicken is gross..) and she does not warm up to him (i won’t not ever never ever no no no) and he looks like he wants a hug but he goes for a high five instead. scary marlowe has to take a second as her boundaries are respected. scary marlowe hates terry stampler jr with a passion that will never end.

okay so i gotta be real. i’m not.. the biggest oak family fan. henry was my least favorite of the dads and if i look at normal too hard he’ll start looking back and then my eyes will fall out of my head as i try to avoid looking in a mirror. however. normal growing up and his parents (and their friends) liking his sister more. not loving never loving ‘we love you both equally!’ but. normal starts liking citrus candy because his sister doesn’t and that’s all she leaves in the bags that marco brings. normal wearing hero’s hand-me-downs. normal’s mother giving hero the first cookie from the batch every time (even though they aren’t very good anyways). normal’s dad spends, like, every afternoon with hero but it’s totally, like, okay and cool, like, i have homework to do anyways, like, by the time they get back i’ll be snoozing from how hard i was hitting the books haha. normal assuring his parents to put hero first because they will anyways and at least then he doesn’t feel bad about it because now they don’t feel bad about it and see everyone is happy!!! see everyone is having a good time!!! everything is fine nothing is wrong nothing ever will be my parents love me and that’s all that matters

okay i need to finish my partner’s christmas present now i took a break to do this and it’s been. a Hot second. hope u r having a nice weekend aether :) happy holigays

ough oguh ough absolutely eating this up btwwww OK BUT YEAH . taylor in that episode man ,,,, hurt me so much ,,.,..,.,. him just being sad and showing even just a bit of vulnerability and that no , it's not all ok . *I'm* not all ok . ough sobs about Taylor Swift (not that one) forever and ever he is everything to meeee

and linc :( Linc realizing his dependency on his dad's and their failures in raising him ,,,, her realizing that they aren't perfect , they're actually both super fucked up , and as much as they tried not to , they fucked him up too . man ....

waough scary ,, , your whole little analysis here is sososo important to me bcs ough yeah :( scary not knowing her dad as anything other than the one thing that can make her mom yell , and yet attaching to him over Terry . dismissing it bcs cmon he couldn't've been that bad , he must've just had a bad day . I must be remembering it wrong . but really she's just afraid that Terry could be just like him - anyways ,,,. scary makes me so 💥💥💥💥

normal ,, but that's so real like Henry is probably my least favorite of the dads and then normal ,, I cannot look upon him , he is too just like me fr fr /neg . but yeah :( him being upset about being the second choice so he starts to convince himself it's because he wants hero to be the first choice . that it's fine , he likes being second anyways . hes happy to take heros leftover candies , they're his favorites anyways . oh yeah hero can go out with Dad and uncle lark , he has homework he has to be doing anyways . ough normal ,,,,

anywayssss hope you were able to finish your partners present !! hope your weekend was also v good and I wish you happy holigays :3

[appreciatingtokrev]

OKAY SO during the like week or so while you were gone i got really really REALLY fucking deep into my emo punk bands/bandom hyperfixation and oh my god someone please save me

you don't really have to hear too much abt it if youre uninterested atm since ive infodumped abt this to nearly all my irls who'd listen but if u do thatz cool to :) but yeah uh my bandom hyperfixation got/is getting so bad to the point im referencing real events/theories in my band au fic 😭? esp cuz the two ppl surrounding it are in bands that i headcanon on the tokyorev dudes so yeah it worked way too fucking perfect and im here for it!

but lil spoiler its abt a lot of unrequited izakaku<3333 if you remember that one sanzu x mucho breakup fic i wrote before i kinda hinted the arrival of izana coming back into mucho's life so thatz where the angst comes from. its ur good ol 'i'd die for you but i don't really think you know how serious i am about it' dynamic (again, projecting)

but yes. going into the bandom rabbit hole unexpectedly and never being able to look back has been one of the best and the worst things to happen to me /affectionate. like my sleep schedule is at an all time low my grades arent getting any better and my bf is already having problems of his own with HIS boyfriend (who is also sadly my ex. fucked up i know) BUT. staying up all not consuming media and content from these lil fandoms make that lil whole in my heart rn full for just a few hours so- it means a lot to me yk <3

ANYWAYS i love my emo boys pls ask me abt my emo boys. (u dont have to btw im just insane abt them)

oh oh i am definitely listening!! this feels kinda embarassing to say tbh i know like. zero things abt music most of the time i’m just not interested in more than like three songs from a specific artist/band so yeah never hyperfixated or anything. which means taku dear i have no clue what i should even ask you 😭😭 but but but i am listening, feel free to infodump!! i love absorbing new information <3

also. unrequited izakaku :((( <33

[localgardenweed]

Omg I kinda wanna be your friend so bad because:

-I too am a Japan Self-shipper

-I am also a Osomatsu fan and to a lesser extent Toilet Bound Hanako-kun, way of the house husband, Code name kids next door

-You are a great artist!

-You seem fun, funny and friendly!

-I am pretty sure we have the same pronouns lol! I think I have a different preference order though

Reasons why I am unsure and nervous:

-I am just shy

-I have only two friends and haven't made friends in years, I think I have forgotten how

-I have low self confidence and feel like I might be a bad person

-You are a great artist and I should be better at art by now (in general not better than you, I am still at the stage where it is hard to grasp what I am drawing)

-I just realized you are under 18 and I am way older than you. I much rather keep you safe and make sure you feel safe. I honestly, am not sure if it is OK to even write this.

Spinning around the room of my brain rn squealing and jumping up and down. It’s completely fair why you’re a little hesitant, and also like good job being like “maybe its a little unsafe being friends with a minor as a older person” like dont mind interacting i love chatting so dont ever feel you need to block yourself im ok with the casual talk but yeah sometimes i get scared of much older people when we talk like more often and not once in a while IM SCARED OF ADULTS (Basically anyone older than 25) AND IM ALMOST A ADULT THATS SCARY IMMA BE THE VILLAIN I AM THE ENEMY. Ask in 5 to 10 years then we can talk and be besties for life

I have a little sneaking feeling who you are i check who likes and reblogs my stuff its how i keep the dnis out of my space, and dont worry if your art isn’t “as good” as it should be man, it takes time takes work and sometimes it may not work out but that doesn’t mean its shitty or not worth anything, as long as it makes you happy what else matters, improve cause you want to mot cause you should. Everyone starts drawing like for realsies and not just the occasional at different points, i started like taking art seriously like in 3rd grade maybe 1st grade idk blurry but i got alot of years under my belt already and still so much more man. We all have our strengths and weaknesses in art like realism, could never do it. And thats okay

Build up that self confidence, dont feel the need to rush it cause that too takes time! You need to know you’re awesome sauce and if you really feel you’re a bad person, take some time to think and ask why you think you are and how you can fix it, like REALLY think about it not a “i forgot to say thank you to the barista i am a monster” no you just made a mistake and forgot smth you arent horrible you’re fine. If you threw the boiling hot cup of coffee at the barista for using cow milk instead of goat milk thats a problem, fix that, get some help.

Sorry if this like a jumbled mess too i wrote this when i originally got it then came back to it later after brain farting and life busy but now i have finally finished my epic rant i hope this was acceptable sorry if this sucked major ass

[rotting-brains]

rant

had an epiphany recently that a reason im doing so bad in school is that my teachers arent praising me anymore. yes the burnout is the main problem, but i was burnt out in elementary school too, and i still managed to get good grades (and yeah whatever elementary school was easier but it wasnt easier when i was a kid cuz i was a fucking kid yk). id ask my teachers how i did that day everyday after school and then id keep repeating said behaviour as long as they were praising me for it. in middle school, id get praised by teachers without asking sometimes, and then id latch onto those compliments until i got new ones. but now all im getting is insults. teachers telling me i dont care, that im annoying, that its my fault im failing. i dont need to be better if they never give me a chance anyway. every little good thing i do is ignored only to bash me and treat me like ill amount to nothing.

[studyari]

march update

it’s officially midterms time. i thought i would post an update becuase this semester has took SO much out of me. i finished my internship funded by the national science foundation in january, can’t say i made too many ties there since i hardly saw my superiors. BUT i did get to know the metrology lab pretty well and even got their machine working. going into it i did NOT imagine i could accomplish that but i felt so good getting it working! i even made a little overturn training manual and gave it over to them. 

okay so starting this semester i am in my gateway courses. so a bunch of physics courses at one time ugh plus i was taking differential and linear algebra. i got so stressed out with the workload that i had a dream where i crashed into a forest and the airbags went off lol. that same morning i dropped my lab and differential equations. it was just WAYYY too much for me. 

i’m still a full time student so it was clear i was doing too much. hmm okay so i’m in my gateway courses so mathematical physics, classical mechanics, and modern physics. i knew i was going to struggle with classical mechanics because kinematics alone was hard for me to grasp and it’s basically dynamics. i didn’t apply as an engineering major literally because i didn’t want to take dynamics LOL i struggled in statics. Of course im taking the same class just named something else and a lot harder T_T. i also wanted to get some undergrad research experience and work in an electronic materials lab but yeah i’m just tooooo busy it was a good idea though lmao.

okay but honestly mechanics is the hardest class for me, modern physics is my most interesting class, and mathematical isn’t too bad even though i suck at math because our teacher grades us mostly on completion and work shown. the hardest thing about this semester is just the schedule itself. so we have to take all three at the same time for some reason or you wouldn’t be able to register for the class ummm overkill much?! and the schedule is from 10am - 7:30 pm ughhhh. I have to take the bus there so add on a couple hours and then i have to walk to class. ohhh i miss the online/hybrid classes so much lol. by the time i’m in my last class i am literally asleep. don’t worry ive started drinking coffee.

looking on the brighter sides of things i’m being a lot more involved in campus and i’m really liking getting to know my classmates! i am so antisocial and awkward so im surprised. i’ve been going to the women in stem meetings, society of astronomy, nsbe coding workshops, ieee circuits workshops, career fairs, and boba socials just for funsies. i realize school isnt all about good grades and killing yourself for that A. i’ve even had more time to spend with my friends (it is so true what they say about making time not having it lol). almost every other weekend we see each other and have little celebrations, watch movies, have study dates, go to the park, get coffee/boba, go shopping etc. and facetiming my friends back in arizona as well! one of my club advisors told me its actually the b and c students that do better in the job market and isnt that freaking crazy! ever since then ive been reminding myself that being perfect and getting a’s isnt always worth it. i have other life to live too and people wont necessarily fault me for that.

okay as for my grades though i have been bombing every single quiz like a 50 or LESS LMAO. that’s with me studying at least a whole day before. however as of now i have passed every exam so far. so my current grades right now are 90% in modern physics, 98% mathematical physics, 100% classical mechanics (but a lot f the grades arent in yet), and a 99% in linear algebra. See and thats me not killing myself this semester so im super happy i decided to not overdo it, it really doesnt make as much as a difference as i thought lmao clearly.

looking forward to spring break! i was in therapy/behavioral health all last year trying to tackle my anxiety and i would say its been helping. its all about making a choice. i’m also in physical therapy now for the next couple of months and then once summer starts i’ll start going back to therapy again. this post might seem positive but this semester i have never felt more unmotivated or stupid. some days i feel like i cant do this and that everyone else around me is so much more capable. but i know as soon as i give into those thoughts that i’ll end up giving up and i don't want to give up. my boyfriend also has been feeling the same way. 

i also lost my wallet this week soooo all my documentation and identification is gone ugh. i had a full on breakdown but am getting that figured out. i’m going to an applications of black holes seminar tomorrow and i am super excited about that. took my linear algebra exam today too, (WHY IS THAT CLASS SO HARD BTW). i havent yet applied but theres this summer research opportunity happening at the university of toronto (dunlap institute of physics and astrophysics) and i think im going to apply! i really want to travel this year and experience something new!

[astranne]

Hhh just got around to remembering anxious!xiao brainrots so here u go!

For starters, im calling him a nerd. I love ners tropes so much they itch my brain so perfectly. He can probably read off his favorite science/math/history book in the exact words. If your lucky he can even cite the direct sources.

Anxious!Xiao not knowing when he should speak during conversations and just floating in the background or ignoring large groups entirely, if they arent his friends he arent going near them. Double fuck no if theyre anyone that bullies him.

Anxious!Xiao knowing how to kick ass. As in, if someone fucks with him he will lay their ass on the ground immediately. Im a firm believer in Xiao being able to takw someone out easily despite their size. He wont say anything of course after he wins a fight, he doesnt want that type of attention.

Anxious!Xiao only being himself to close friends and people he truly trust because everyone uses him and he believes he isnt worth their time or friendship after they all leave him after they get what they want from him. Xiao getting rlly bad anxiety when they add him to group chats and just lurking in the background until someone speaks to him directly (now theyre wondering when he was added).

Now a few purely indulgent headcanons

I will be a strong believer in Xiao's ear twitching when someone says his name and knowing exactly who it is. Also, Xiao having a pet bird. Dont ask just him with a pet bird. Also Xiao just infodumping about his favorite thing whoever has been unlucky enough to ask.

And for some angst.

Xiao's caregivers only caring about his grades, when they ask about why he has anything lower than a A his anxiety gets worse, his caregivers are probably acutely aware of this man's crippling anxiety but they ignore it, because he has grades and school to take care of. Xiao's siblings picking on him for not having many friends or not going out as much and making fun of him for fidgeting or stuttering when he speaks, or when hes speaking softly they mock his voice so he just clams up (love u xiao i promise 😊).

Xiao getting bullied but the moment they mention any of his younger siblings he decks them in the face and might even give them a black eye, or might even sprain their wrists only Xiao can mess with his younger siblings. (Alternatively, Xiao being the fun big brother to anyone younger than him because he adopts the outcasts of his school)

I feel as though this was longer than usual for some reason. The amount of times i had to retype this because i closed the tumblr app (i write on my phone) and fell asleep halfway because i started writing this at like 5am 🫡 i did get sleep i just love staying up late during the summer

-🪶

ANXIOUS!XIAO- XIAO BRAINROTS- FROM FISCHL ANON, TODAY IS A BLESSED DAY-

xiao is a nerd. yes he is. he is just so smart <3 and he's really proud of it too. also- xiao with glasses- HHHHHH- but like, the round glasses, with very thing metal thingies if you get what i mean,,, and then him just pushing it up and mumbling about homework and uasiudfgjha-

anxious!xiao who has no idea how to interact with anyone, like anyone at all. it makes him super nervous and he'd rather not speak at all if that means he won't embarrass himself. especially if it's a group of strangers- xiao is an introvert.

also, xiao being a badass and no one knowing he is one- i- yeah, he will absolutely destroy someone if he wants. but until he gets to this point... takes a rather long time and this is why he often gets picked on. they all think he's weak, but he is in fact not, he's just the bigger person abt it <3

anxious xiao who has very few friends, maybe one or two and even with them he feels just... so anxious. class chats always end up with him reading but never writing/sending something, not even homework when someone asks. he just can't- he gets too nervous, fearing another situation, where he ends up used and alone. he just doesn't really have trust in humans anymore :(

PLEASE?? xiao with a bird??? that bird's name is alatus and is his one big love. when someone asks if he has a pet, xiao will literally bloom and hhhhhh- just talk about his fav lil birdie.

sobbing rn. this hurts really deep. my heart is bleeding- xiao's family just being assholes and xiao can't do anything about it and they only make it worse- this is why he's always studying so it doesn't get worse. he has the unhealthy mindset of being perfect and it's- not good for him :((

but him still being protective of his family is just <3333 xiao, you're perfect and i love you very much <333

just- xiao, who has problems with social things because he never learned, always feeling pressured thanks to his family but he can't just- stop. he has to continue, so they will be proud, he has to protect his siblings, because who else will??

ALSO- thank you sm for sending this!!! i totally feel this, tumblr moblie can be a fuckin bitch <33 but please get enough rest, even tho it's summer :)

[thcweasley]

Yours

PAIRING : George Weasley X Y/N

SUMMARY : George getting jealous of his twin brother for being closer to you .

WARNINGS : none? Make out? implying things? hehe

WORDS : 1.7k

A/N: lol this hits too close to home, growing up i was shadowed by heather sister :(  I was going to turn this into smut but im not sure.. cos i never wrote a smut before lol.

“Focus on your work Weasley” Snape smacked George Weasley’s head with the book he was holding, causing the whole class to look at his direction.

George was already an easily distracted person to begin with. but today especially, he got his mind somewhere else.

He was looking at you and his twin brother Fred, giggling while trying to figure out snape’s task. All of his life he never thought that he would feel this much jealously towards the older twin. Sure, sometimes it bothers him a bit that people pay more attention to him, or the fact that people always refers them as “Fred & George”, not “George & Fred”. But he knew it’s a silly thing to be bothered about so he always managed to brush it off.

But not today, Fred had been assigned with you. The girl George met on his last solo trip to honeydukes. It shocked him how he never saw you around before, despite being in the same house and grade. But hes glad that he met you. George didn’t like to be cheesy, but he was so sure that you were made for him. Whenever youre around, he just felt so happy. You’re funny, kind, and on top of all you’re prettiest thing he ever seen. Sadly, for him, other people seems to think that way about you.

He introduced you 2 weeks ago to his brother and friends. You seem to get along great with everyone. He liked that, his brother and friends is everything for him. But he cant help it but feeling a little bit jealous. He didn’t wanna admit it but this jealously is most probably because he was insecure about his feeling for you. Before everything he was sure that you fancy him the same way he fancies you. But now, hes not sure. And he hated it, youre supposed to be his girl.

The class that felt so long was finally over. George quickly stood up, walking towards the common room. he just want to burry his face onto his bed now. He felt an arm linking his. “Hey you” it was you. He let out a big sigh, not knowing how to feel right now.

“Hey, did you have a good time today?” He hated how catty he sounded. Knowing you, he knew you wouldn’t able to tell.

“Yeah it was fun. Your brother is hilarious you know that?” He rolled his eyes, feeling his face getting hot.

“Well yeah hes a clown” George answered shortly. Wanting you both could just drop this conversation. He didn’t like this, being jealous of his twin brother.

“ahah yeah true, youre also funny too you know” You leaned your head onto Georges arm. At this point it was hard for him to not just pulls you into a big hug. “Whats your plan for the rest of the day?” You asked looking up on him.

“Im not sure, probably just sleep” George answered looking down to you. You looked so cute leaning on to him.

“Wanna have a study date? Snape’s test tomorrow right?” George’s ears perked up at the word date.

A smile creeps on his face. “Yeah sure”

“Brilliant! I’ll see you in 2 hours then!” You gave his arm a squeeze before you go. Leaving George all smiley by himself.

2 hours later, George found himself getting ready for his study date. He finally going to make a move on you. Its obvious that you fancy him now right? At least you were the one who refers their study session as a study date.

He tried to look around for Fred but he was nowhere to be found. He feels weird do anything without asking for the older brother’s advice. But it was time to go to meet you at the Library and he didn’t want to make you wait, so he just decided to cross his fingers and hope for the best.

“Hey” George greeted you, big smile on his face. You look up at him from the book you were reading, smiling back at him. “You got a lot of stuff here” He sat down beside you, looking at paper and pens in front of him.

“Oh its not mine” You answered. “So, do you have anything you’re particularly struggling with?”

Whilst you tried your best to explain the things that he was struggling with. George was doing his best to stay focus on what youre saying instead of you. He cant help but admire your face, your cheeks, your lips. He wonders how would it feel like you press his lips against yours.

“Are you listening to me George?” You asked, knowing the answer pretty well.

“Uh yeah, im sorry I got distracted” he blinked.

You brought your hand on to his head, messing with his red hair. “you’ve been a bit distracted these days. didn’t you got smacked on your head earlier today by Snape?” you chuckled a bit running your fingers on the back of his head. “Did it hurt?” You tilted her head closer to him, rubbing the back of his head.

He couldn’t seem to think straight at this point. The fact that youre so close to him right now, he could smell your scent. He took a deep breath trying to be brave and make a move. He put his hand on top of yours, pulling it away from his head. “Y/N..” He started, linking his fingers with yours. “I think I like you”

“Yeah?” You chuckled feeling. your cheeks starting to get warm. “Whats going on George? Why are you suddenly so serious?”

“Well, Im not sure how you feel about me. But I got nothing to lose so here I am. I like you” Surprised by his words, you didn’t say anything. So he thought he could just make a move then. He leaned in closer to you getting you lips closer to each other. Not knowing what to do you just close your eyes. He smiled, taking this as a greenlight to proceed his act. Until all of the sudden-

“Your tea is here!!” Fred walked in, causing them to pull away from each other. “Hey that’s my seat George, do you not see the stuffs on the table?” He said as he sat down filling the gap between You and George.

“Fred what are you doing here?” George asked, clearly  frustrated with the situation.

“That’s not how you greet people, my dear brother” He said handing you the tea he was talking about. “Besides, youre not the only one who got invited to this study group. Right Y/N?” You just nod at him feeling flustered, thinking about what could’ve happened if Fred didn’t just walk in.

The next day, George has been avoiding you since last night. He thought you guys shared the same feeling. But yesterday proved him wrong. He was just another friend to you

Snape’s exam was a group work, being Fred’s partner obviously made you work with him for the exam. You looked so happy, George wishes it was him working with you instead of his twin brother. He hated this so much, it’s ridiculous how jealous he felt towards his twin brother right now.

The exam’s finally over, George saw you coming up to him from the corner of his eyes. “Hey” you greeted him. “Wanna go to Three Broomstick later? I haven’t really seen you all week”

“Who’s coming?” He asked, hoping this time its just the two of you. And everything that he thought about last night wasn’t true.

“Uh everyone. Fred, Lee, Angelina and others im not sure” George snickered. How stupid of him to think that you wanna be alone with him. How stupid of him to think he got a chance with you.

“I think im gonna pass on that” he took a deep breath. “Im tired. Ill see you around” He left you dumb folded, walking away towards his room.

The night comes around. The common room feels empty, his friends had left him for Three Broomstick. George just chilling alone on his bed when he heard someone opened the door.

“George?” You walked towards him, sitting at the end of his bed “Hey, im just.. I just wanna make sure everything is okay”

“Why you here” George answered bitterly. “Arent you suppose to be out with your friends, with my brother?”

“Well yeah but I wanna check up on you. And talk about last night..”

“What do you wanna talk about Y/N?” He took a deep breath. “I already get it, you see me as a friend. If anything, you like Fred more than me. I get it don’t worry. Everyone always picks him over me, im used to it”

“George…” you scotched in closer too him, trying to stop him from rambling all these nonsenses.

“Im not even sure why I thought you like me, he is the better twin. Im just me. I just thought I have a chance with you. Throughout my life, ive always get hands down from my siblings, share with my siblings.” He realised how ridiculous he sounded but it didn’t stop him. “I love how you get along with my friends. But, i just thought, I thought youre my person. Finally someone I can proudly say mine. I thought you feel the same way as I do…” Georges voice was getting quitter when he felt your hand grabbing his. “I like you a lot and I get that you don’t feel the same way. So if youre coming here to explain that i-“

His words were cut off by your lips crashing to his. “You never let me speak Georgie”  You murmured against his lips “I don’t know how you got it all wrong” you kissed his cheek lightly. “I didn’t know you felt that way. George. I like you, im your person. Ive always been“

With a big smile he pulled in for another kiss. He held on to your waist pulling you closer to him, positioning you onto his lap. You threw your and around his neck, deepening the kiss whilst his hands lazily griped your waist.

You can feel something poking between the inner part of your legs. With a slight smile you press your legs more on to him, grinding it against him. Earning a low groan from him.

He held your hips down on him, so both of you can feel more of the friction. His lips travelled to your jaw and to the back of your neck. You could feel his hot breath, sending shivers down your spine as he moved his lips closer to your ears. “Prove it” OKAY SO Let me know if you want a part 2 smut off of this HAHAH.

hehe part 2

this was quite hard to write cos i feel bad for him ahaha. this is loosely based on a true story. but i never got my Y/N :’)

MY OTHER WORKS follow me / send request / talk to me! im lonely (if u send me anonymously maybe click here) my collaborative ford anglia playlist Christmas with the Weasley playlist

[tomdiddlyumptious]

T.H| Thottery

Summary: your doing pottery

Warnings: i guess sexual tension? AND YOUR A WITCHHH- AND A PLANT MOMMY- AND SOULMATES

A/n: its all i could think of when i saw tom in that tank top- and

It was another day in the shop, silence filling the room as you walked around to see the stuff you and tom made, the small store cozy, mostly green and beige everywhere to get a warm mood going.

The room smelled like roses, an incense in your hand as you took your time, slightly bobbing your head to nirvana in the background.

The bell rung letting you know someone was here, you poked your head from the shelves and looked at the door, seeing tom struggle with donuts in his dominant hand while the coffee stood in the other.

“Youre late!” You smiled and he groaned, thanking you when you made your way over to grab the donuts. “Im not late- your just early” he said, watching as you took a donut out and bit into it.

You and tom shared the shop, yes he had dreams of going to be a actor but he wasnt gonna ditch you. Youve both been best friends since he accidentally tripped you and made you cry in 5th grade, which he begged to do your homework as an apology. But there was always a tension when you both grew up, he sent you letters, well check up letters, if you need help on your homework letters, sometimes a hershy bar glued to it.

You told him your okay all the time and to stop wasting time on you, telling him to go feed his dog or clean his room because you knew he always forgot. You sent letters back too, you both didnt call each other because you liked the old ways and he admires that, he liked that you rode on your skateboard just to see him and ask him hows hes doing, he just felt like you are heaven sent.

“Righttt, well i got some crystals” you smiled at him, setting the donuts on the small white table before grabbing the box of crystals. “Y/n you know i dont like that witch stuff!” He glared at you and placed the coffee down next to the donuts.

“But tommy!” You smacked your lips, bending your knees repeatedly like a child. “They’re so beautiful and they mean something! I even got candles and cardsssss!”

He gave you a blank stare, before looking away “fine” “thank youuuu!” You walked over and he sat in his stool infront of the turntable, you made your way over and set the box in his lap, getting on your knees and opening the box.

“Swear that you wont curse me or this has no bad juju” “i just have to clean them first-“ “Y/N!” He groaned “whatttt!” You poked his leg, “stop being mean to me!”

“Im not being mean to you!” He looked down at you, you let out a hmph and got up, snatching the box before taking it into the backroom where your shared stuff went.

“Im sorry y/n!” He said, looking in the direction of the back room but sighed when he didn’t get an answer, instead of saying something again he got up to go back there, seemed like you went to the bathroom because you disappeared. He grabbed a bucket and filled it with water, then he grabbed a thing of clay that was wrapped in saran wrap to keep it fresh and went back to his turn table.

He set the stuff down, putting his foot on to buttom and watching the small circle turn before lifting his white shirt, revealing his abs right before his black tank top came down.

He heard the box of donuts opening which left a smile on his face, quietly walking over and sneaking behind the shelf before throwint his shirt at you, leaving a groan before you looked back at him, shooting him a glare.

“Can you hold that for me?” “You couldve kept it in the back smarty pants” “i guess i didnt want to this time” he shrugged with a smrik, walking off “your shirt stinks!” You lied, making him laugh and shake his head before sitting down and getting to work.

You looked through google trying to find more research about the crystals before tom called you for help. “Y/nnnnn!” “Yes thomas?” You asked, still looking at your phone.

“I need your helppp!” He said, looking down at the awkward clay bowl, a few lumps here and there in it. “Coming!” You stood and made your way over, wheb you peeked your head out you saw him trying to fix it.

His hair fluffy so his curles hanged over his head, his fingers painted with clay as he gently rubbed the bowl trying to flatten it out.

“What happened?” You asked and he sighed, shrugging “it just isnt working” “it’s probably like that because you didnt put on your lucky apron” you chuckled, grabbbing the both yours and his aprons next to the large green plant.

A loud groan left his lips as his shoulders slumped and rested his eblow on his knee, setting his cheek on his knuckles as he looked at you walking over. “Dont bring any bad spirits in here tom”

“Hey! Im not trying to!” He playfully rolled his eyes, you handed him his apron, small spidermans on it while yours had my little ponys.

“Alrightttt” you muttered, telling him to move his hand, when he did you sat on the leg nearest to you and he instantly wrapped his hand around your waist, watching as you dipped your hands in the water. “Its your turn to wash the aprons” you muttered, he let out a hum and a small laugh before you stepped on the button, letting the water drip from your hands and onto the clay.

“Can you make a heart in the middle?” He whispered, rubbing your side as he watched your hands work. “Whos it for?” You laughed and he shrugged “you” “me?” Your eyebrows furrowed and he squeezed your waist tight “yeah, why not?”

“Uh- i dont know?” You shrugged a bit, stuttering. Trying your hardest to focus but you messed up, a sigh leaving both of your lips as you had to restart.

You put the clay back in a glob, putting your hands around making it tall, a cough left toms lips as he looked away, while you tried your hardest not to laugh. “Y/n fix it” he asked. “I dont know...i kinda like it like this” you said, placing a hand on his knee.

“It looks like a penis” and with that you laughed “no seriously fix itttt!” “Okay okay, only if you let me do a reading on you”

“Y/n i dont like witchery” “but you like harry potter?” “I-its different” “fineee, i only wanted to know what your love life is looking like” you muttered and toms ears perked up. “You can find that out?” “Yeah, but you dont want to soooo-“

“Okay okay! Just fix please!” He lifted the knee that you were sitting on and rubbed your side letting you know he was ready. You chuckled and got to work.

About 5 minutes later you asked for toms hands, he gave them to you willingly and you sat all the way in his lap, tugging his hands forward his head was right in your neck, heavy breathing on your neck as you could help but get a little goosebumps on your neck.

You rocked his hands back and forth “mhm, just like that” you muttered “yeah like this?” He teased, “no your fucking up”. “Fuck off” you both laughed, you let his hands go and let him do it on his own.

“Are you ready for the reading?” You asked, tom sitting infront of you nervously and shirtless, both of your hands clean and creation drying in the back.

“I think so” he shrugged, you lit the sage “this is a cleaner okay, calm down. This is to save me and you from getting possessed”

His jaw dropped as he got up, a loud laugh leaving your lips before you told him your kidding. “Dont play like that y/n!”

You set the crystals out, on the end of the both of your ends of the table. “Y/n we arent transporting to another dimension, right?” He asked, looking at the sage and how professional it looks. “Noo we arent, you want the love reading or not”

“Im gonna shut up” he said and you agreed, telling him it would save the whole world. You shuffled the deck before knocking on it, his eyebrows furrowed as he let out that the sage stinks which made you shoot daggers.

“Alright tom” you let out a deep sigh, looking at the card infront of you. He looked at you confused, then looked at the cards.

“The Fool, High priestess, The Lovers, and death reversed” you looked up at him and lifted your eyebrows “are you resisting something?”

He shrugged “what could I possibly be resisting?”

“Im seeing soulmates, mystery and innocence. Maybe uhhhh something from childhood, someone from childhood”

He felt a cold chill, but made it stay hidden.

“Young, im getting young, you’ve probably walked by your soulmate already, had some type of chatting with them, gotten close to them, maybe some type of physical touch?” You mostly talked to yourself, tapping The Fool card before grabbing the deck, two cards flipping out and landing on tom. You reached over and grabbed them, “The World Reversed and The Star, tom you are holding something back and your spirits are giving you hope, they are hoping you are gonna speak up because you are disappointing them”

“Well im not holding anything back!” He said, panicked. “Do you think or feel like youve passed your soulmate?” You asked, he hesitatingly nodded his head. “That you have touched them?” He nodded again, a large smile on your face.

“Im so excited for youuu!” You danced in your chair, tom grinned a bit, “uhm with these card i feel like they ARE spiritual. Thomas” you glared at him. “And lets check the bottom of the deck”

You looked at the bottom and saw “temperance, i getting that after you do this, weight will be lifted off of your shoulders”

“Uhh okay” he awkwardly smiled, shifting in his seat. You looked at all the cards “lets get into looks”

“Im seeing a lot off y/s/c (your skin color), they might have y/e/c, i see they have a bright smile, y/h/c”

“Y/n?” He asked. You looked up at him and furrowed your eyebrows “why does that describe you?” “Describe me...?” You took it all in, going back and furrowing your eyebrows as you thought about what you said.

“Are you my soulmate?” He asked. “How am I supposed to know that? And uh, soulmates doesnt always mean that we like each other, were just connect platonically” “but what if we arent.......platonic soulmates?” He asked, looking at you.

“Why wouldnt we?” You did a panicked laugh. “I dont know” “do you think we are soulmates?” You asked, putting the cards down. “I mean, we get along really well” he looked away from you, you bit your lip.

“So we are soulmates,” “i guess yeah” he shrugged “platonic soulmates-“ “i-i dont think so” he looked at you, “tom what-“ “i dont wanna be platonic soulmates y/n”

Your eyebrows furrowed “do you like me?” You laughed, and he nodded, “i uh always have” he played with his fingers and looked down at his bare chest. “Why did you tell me sooner?”

“Huh?” He looked up at you. “You were obviously stressing for no reason-“ “do you like me too?”

“Yes” you shrugged, you had to. You noticed your love for him when he sent you your fith letter.

𝑫𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝒚/𝒏,

𝒀𝒐𝒖 𝒉𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝒏𝒐 𝒇𝒖𝒄𝒌𝒊𝒏 𝒊𝒅𝒆𝒂 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒚 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆𝒔 𝒊 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒓𝒆-𝒕𝒓𝒚 𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒔𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒌𝒇𝒖𝒍𝒍. 𝑱𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒓𝒆𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒕𝒉𝒂𝒕 𝒊 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒊 𝒅𝒊𝒅 𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒚 𝒅𝒐𝒈. 𝑨𝒏𝒅 𝒑𝒍𝒆𝒂𝒔𝒆 𝒔𝒕𝒐𝒑 𝒔𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒎𝒆 𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒄𝒐𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒆, 𝒊 𝒂𝒍𝒎𝒐𝒔𝒕 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒎𝒚 𝒑𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒔 𝒚𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒅𝒂𝒚.

𝑳𝒐𝒗𝒆, 𝒕𝒐𝒎𝒎𝒚.

“And you didnt say anything?” “Well i wasnt into spirits and shit like that when i was 15!” You said to him. “So we love each other. Like not platonically but like” he put his first fingers together. “To fast!” You said, and he laughed standing up and leaning over the table and you did the same, his hand came up to your cheek as yours went to the nape of his neck to play with the hairs, he gently pressed his lips on yours, you giggled against his lips and kissed back.

When you both pulled away you pressed your foreheads together, both laughing and pressing each others lips together again “im like 95 percent sure our spirit guides are high fiving each other right now” you muttered. “Yeah?” He asked, kissing the side of your lips. “Yeah” “mhm” “are they like watching us right now?”

“I dont wanna freak you out” you bit his bottom lip tugging it. “You wont freak me out i promise” “nahhhh”

[nat-stimmy]

nobody ever suspected anything. i never thought anything was specifically wrong with me. i guess im still in denial over my diagnosis and im ngl it is something i am highly embarrassed of and will go to the grave with this rather than ever tell anybody EXCEPT...if they think im weird, then maybe i will tell them.

i often feel like i have been wrongly diagnosed too. i just feel like i dont have this and im just, severe anxiety is all.

can i just say something though? like its a burden on me, for real. so i was "working" in this little cafe thingy slash idek i was sat on the computer doing these pamphlets and whatnot for them because nobody knew anything on how to make them or something, idk, but i was on a walk with this one woman who works there, she's like this one person who, if something happens, like i cant figure something out, she's the one i should talk to and whatnot. but we were on this walk and i still remember this despite this happening in fucking 2018. sorry for cussing...but she was like, SO SHOCKED when she asked me if i had gone to a special needs classes, and i said no i had never, always went to a normal class and school, had no issues whatsoever with school except for the matter of fact that i fucking hated school and homework, i have never been a fan of it, but the way she was like shocked over it, i was taken aback, i honestly felt insulted. like she thinks im stupid or something? and thats the issue i know people who go to special classes and whatnot arent necessarily stupid but the fact when people judge my knowledge, is what gets to me. she's also make damn sure i know they are kidding and whatnot, when i used to live off being sarcastic due to severe bullying online i developed this sarcastis persona that thankfully toned down eventually. but that really insulted me lmao. was thinking "...excuse me?" i just dont like people being like that to me.

again i apologise but thats just how i be. be working. and i know im gonna possibly get yelled at for saying that but again ik they aint stupid, but thats just what i thought, and unfortunately think, because...judgement. like that. gets to me. but only irl.

sorry for this awkward rant.

i completely understand, don't worry! and dont worry abt cursing i swear all the time JKLFDJKLDSF yeah, i was never in any special ed classes even when i was misdiagnosed as a kid as having ADHD (a rushed diagnosis forced by the school i was going to at the time because they said i'd be kicked out if i didnt get medicated even though i wasnt. doing anything. i was just doing Normal Autistic Kid stuff) actually i was in advanced classes as a kid! i was reading at a college level in like 3rd grade and so i got put in the gifted program and while you and I know that being in special ed isn't anything bad, or indicative of your intelligence, NT people usually don't share that opinion and generally have ableist ideas of the kinds of kids who are in those classes, and honestly i'd have been a little taken aback too as someone who is proud of being autistic since i Don't Fucking Trust Allistics and i tend to assume the worst in scenarios like this

[ultrastellara]

hi i saw that you were taking requests if you aren’t anymore feel free to ignore this!! if you are then can i get a kirishima x bakugou’s sister how would bakugou react thanks and i hope you have a great day!! :)

sorry for my lateness but pls dont worry, i love getting requests! and enjoy the scenario that you wanted , lovely!

DATING KIRISHIMA AS BAKUGOU'S SISTER

kirishima x bakugou's sister reader

fluff , cuteness, & friends to lovers <3

the beginning

i think being bakugou's sister isnt that easy

bakugou wouldnt be the type of sibling to hand you the toy that you desperately wanted

he also seems the type to also make you jealous because of his grades or brag about how his quirk is way more awesome than yours

mistuki and masaru were grateful that they were able to have a daughter, so you were mostly the spoiled child out of the family

you werent snotty or arrogant because bakugou took over that job for you

between you and bakugou, you shared a two year difference

you were the kinder sibling, the one who would give the toy to bakugou

you were also the one who would give your money to bakugou if he forgot his lunch money

now when it he attended UA, you were attending middle school still

you acknowledged that bakugou was childhood friends with midoriya

you remembered all the play dates they had and the moments they shared over all might

you would always try to come into their conversations, trying to make friends with midoriya

midoriya wouldnt talk back much but when he tried to, bakugou would tell you to go away

bakugou really hated the fact that you would tried to be his friend

so he would purposely give excuses or things for you to do or go with

you didnt know he hated the idea with you hanging out with his own best friend

but he simply hated it, because he found you " annoying "

as bakugou attended UA, he would always or sometimes bring home his best friend kirishima

now let me tell you that, kirishima wasnt exactly like midoriya

kirishima would cut bakugou off if he tried telling you to go back to your room

but you just wanted to make friends that's all

kirishima wasnt the type to ignore what you wanted to say

he would actually listen to you and chat with you

" so are you also a fan of all might, kirishima ?" you asked

" hmm not really but crimson riot is my favorite hero!" he said cheerfully

bakugou would always leave the room whenever you two talked

the only time where you didnt talk to kirishima was when bakugou and him would have study sessions in his room

you would stop by once in a while to give them food or drinks

sometimes you'll chat with kirishima but very minimal

you respected him and he respected you too

on days where him and bakugou arent studying they're probably playing games

now during those times you would always stay in bakugou's room just to talk to kirishima about the things you learned in school that day

did bakugou get irritated? yeah

but he wouldnt bother you and kirishima, since he felt okay with you hanging out with his best friend

during their game sessions , you would always be next to kirishima watching him as he played the game

your eyes would be focused on the screen, however once in a while you would look at kirishima and admire his face

you thought no one in the room would notice this small habit

until you caught bakugou giving you a disgusted look

the look of ' stop looking at him you're being so fucking weird '

you would always give him back a happy smile to just piss bakugou off but you didnt stop this habit after that encounter

ever since that encounter of just looking at kirishima, you slowly started to want to see him everyday

it didnt scare or catch bakugou off guard because he only viewed you and kirishima as friends too

kirishima never saw you annoying or stupid like how bakugou did

" hey katsuki, is kirishima coming today?" you ask as you're standing near his doorway

" yeah, what about it dumbie?" he would annoyingly reply

" oh nothing just asking that's all " you would run off to your room and waited for kirishima

the middle

bakugou would be hella honest to kirishima about how you are as his sister

honestly kirishima did see you like the way bakugou did

annoying, clingy, and stupid

until the first day he was able to meet you and get to know you as bakugou's sister

boy was bakugou wrong about you

you werent all the things bakugou had told him, he found you fun and kind

you were fun to talk to about heroes you both admired

your kindness when you would always bring him and bakugou their snack and drinks

those traits of you really did catch him off guard

as he got to learn more about you, he found more things he slowly wished he could spend more time with

your beauty was one of them, you had a bright smile whenever you said hello to him

that cheerful laugh and your adorable blush whenever kirishima would compliment about the outfit you had that day

slowly as time passed, he was finding you more as a person than just the title ' bakugou's sister '

as it hit his third year at being UA, you started to attend UA like your brother

he would usually see you hanging out with your friends in the hallways

it was your first year at UA, you werent like the girl that kirishima knew years ago

you still had that smile and laugh but your personality had expanded beautifully

you would hang out with the bakusquad sometimes

you still had cling onto kirishima talking to him like you usually would

you and kirishima have grown closer and could be best friends too

bakugou didnt really care for you hanging out with kirishima since he realized that no matter what he could do you would always find your ways to the shark boy

your friends at UA were suspicious when you told them that you were friends with kirishima

countless times you would always drag your friend over to you while you would follow around your brother and kirishima

they would hear and see the conversations and many interactions that you and kirishima had

they did think that your bond with him was adorable since he was your upperclassman until later on in the year

they wanted to tell you what they had thought of you and him because let's be real, they were sorta tired of this obliviousness between you and kirishima

" you know y/n, you and kirishima seem pretty close to be best friends" your friend said

" yeah i mean i known him since i was in middle school" you stated

your friend gave you a curious look with a head tilt

" what i meant was that im started to think you might have feelings for him. i know you both dont flirt openly but just the way that he looks at you, it seems like hes giving you the look of ' hey youre cute and maybe you and i could be closer than before "they stated

now that changed your view of kirishima

let's just say your friend mightve been right about you and kirishima

the next following week, whenever you had seen him in the hallways or even just think of kirishima

your heart would always beat rapidly

your cheeks were usually flushed with pink and bits of red

you were always all over the place with the conversations you had with him

things were slowly changing of how you looked at him

you never thought of liking him because you didnt see him as a person for you to end up with

you had an ideal type but

i think your ideal type was the definition of kirishima written all over it

kirishima noticed your small changes in how you talked to him but he didn't think of your blushing too much

he understood that you were going through puberty so maybe it was just a normal thing for girls to do with guys

it wasnt until he heard your friend talking to you about kirishima

" im not sure, i feel like me liking or possibly liking kirishima... i think maybe it wont work out.." your voice was spoken softly

" maybe but you never know until you try. i get that he is a upperclassman and that many girls could be after him but he is your brother's best friend and your best friend too. if you really like him, i think you should go for it. unless hes taken but seeing the times hes been hanging out with you i doubt he has a partner" he heard them saying.

she likes me ? he thought to himself with red hues coming onto his cheeks

he felt bad for dropping in to hear your conversation about him but he couldnt help himself but think more of this

he knew that you were younger than him but he never saw you in a sisterly way

he always looked at you as a person or more specifically a woman

he didnt mind thinking of you liking him however the only part of him that got him wanting to stop having you on his mind was that

how would it work out ?

and how would bakugou react?

he really wanted to talk to you about it but seeing how uncertain you were about these feelings for him, he decided to try to get your attention and see that he too, had possible feelings for you

the pining

ever since he heard that conversation between you and your friend

he would subtlety leave you small hints

sometimes he would ask if he could take your backpack and hold it for you

during the study sessions between him and bakugou, whenever you would come into their dorm room ( with mr aizawa's permission ) he would ask if he could lean against your shoulder when he would get tired from the countless hours of studying

you would always say yes to his offers

you said yes to it because one, you were having crazy feelings for him but two, you thought it was really sweet of him to ask you for these things

you never had any other guy to ask you these offers, kirishima was the first one

as these small interactions started to happen, you caught yourself hearing a conversation between kirishima and bakugou

" you like my sister ?" bakugou asked.

" uhh...what made you think that?" kirishima nervously asked.

you were hiding from the corner away from the hallway where your brother and kirishima stood.

" oi, shitty hair its fucking obvious" he states.

" haha...how did you know ?" Kirishima nervously replied with a fear of look on his face.

" come on you and my sister, i see the way you look at her and the interactions you have with her. i mean im fine with you to date her but shitty hair, if you hurt her feelings or hurt her in anyway i will blast you " bakugou leans in closely to kirishima, giving him a glare.

" so uh most importantly you're okay with me wanting to date your sister ?"

" yeah as long you treat her right shitty hair"

after that conversation with bakugou and kirishima, your face was really red

the confession

kirishima's confession to you was simple

he wanted to tell you when you and him had some alone time away from anyone else

" hey can i talk to you, y/n?" kirishima asks you.

" sure kiri!" you reply back.

kirishima leads you to the hallways where nobody was seen. his face was slowly becoming dark red and he was fidgeting with his hands.

he was nervous. you started to get sorta suspicious of him acting like this but you couldnt jump to conclusions until you heard what he had to tell you.

" you know , im not sure if you know but i wanted to tell you that i think i been liking yo-"

" i know, kiri. " you truthfully told him.

" you know what?" he asks.

" i know you like me" you smiled at him with a chuckle, " it's cute but i accidentally heard you talking to katsuki about me. i apologize for walking in to hear that but-"

you were caught off guard because the next thing you saw that was coming at you. you felt a warm hug and kiss on your forehead by him. you didn't realize he was holding you this close and had kissed you on the forehead. however your cheeks were speaking what your mouth couldn't produce.

" no please y/n, im glad you found out by then. i actually had overheard a conversation between you and your friend about me" he was looking at you with his eyes focused on your eyes," it was cute. really really cute. but since we know how we feel about each other. ill wait for you after i graduate" he states.

your eyes soften as you heard the word 'wait'. you never had experience anything like this especially finding yourself waiting for your brother's best friend to date you after you graduate UA.

" you'll wait for me? are you sure about that, kiri?" you asked him, your hands were softly caressing his cheeks.

"of course. i mean i dont think i want to give myself away to anyone else but you, y/n" he give a reassuring smile before kissing your forehead again.

" let's wait for each other okay?" he hands his pinky finger for you. you take your pinky finger out, both creating a pinky promise.

the dating and reaction of bakugou

after you graduated and became a pro hero like kirishima and your brother, bakugou

you were happily dating the hardening hero, ejiro kirishima

you both had time for each other on the weekends

movie nights would happen, cuddling sessions and sometimes even cooking sessions too

your hands were always held against his and kissed by him too

you were there for him whenever he had insecurities of his quirk

and he was there for you to lean onto when you had moments of your own insecurities too

but you both balanced each other out

your first kiss with him was shared on your half way mark to your first anniversary of dating

then by the full year mark, you both had kissed so much

you often wore his clothes and shared the things you learned from your online classes

he shared his memories at work with his agency and

it felt like the memories you and him shared when you were in middle school

now bakugou, when he first saw you both together once as a couple

as a couple i said not as " friends "

let's say that he was utterly disgusted when he saw his best friend running over to you, kissing you on the forehead

"DISGUSTING! THATS SO FUCKING GROSS JESUS CHRIST !" he had to walk away from the both of you.

he was happy for you and happy for his best friend

but mostly for you, because

he was your older brother and you were his sister but

he didnt ever want to see you hurt from his best friend

sure he bullied you and was a little brat towards you but only he could make you try or feel hurt

if it was someone else like kirishima, he would be hella disappointed in him but also would feel shitty about himself

he doesn't like admiting he cares for you and wants to protect you

but if he can protect you from a far or tell you something to prevent you from getting hurt

that's all he cared for

because from the day he saw you looking at kirishima, he knew that you had to be with his best fiend than anyone else

besides he was ok with you being next to kirishima in the past

and now hes relieved that someday his best friend will be marrying his baby sister

that's all he could care for

[rint4rous]

hogwarts au! oikawa

a/n: wrote this with a bad headache LMAO so if you see mistakes no you didnt <3

yeah help

anyway

oikawa toru

sixth year slytherin

captain of slytherin quidditch team

this one. very popular with the girls.

always gets gifts and confessed to, he turns them all down nicely tho

he flirts with them a little but never goes out with anyone

thanks but no thanks, hes focusing on quidditch

mostly hangs out with hanamaki, matsukawa, and iwaizumi

you, sixth year gryffindor

a chaser for the quidditch team

actually you and oikawa had a bit of a rivalry thing going on

because oikawa was getting good grades AND is good at quidditch

and it doesnt even look like hes trying.

and he lowkey comes off as arrogant sometimes

and youre like i hate geniuses

the two of you met during first year when he tried playfully hitting iwa in the hallway but iwa dodged

and you happen to be speedwalking past and then next thing you know you get slapped???

you stop walking and turn to oikawa

hes like HOLY CRAPDFHJSHJR

“I AM SO SORRY-”

“it’s alright!”

“are you sure??”

“yeah, it was an accident, right? …. unless it wasnt?”

“NO I SWEAR IT WAS AN ACCIDENT”

“i thought so! see you ‘round!”

then you skip away

yeah. yall dont really start competing and shit until you found out your mom and his mom had BEEF??? WHEN THEY WERE IN SCHOOL????

you found that out at the end of first year

“i heard tachibana’s son is in your year. or i guess she’s oikawa now.”

youre like yeah what about it

“my dearest y/n, you’re a smart little girl, okay?”

“so make sure you’re better than that oikawa kid, alright?”

and little innocent you is like “ok”

so start of second year, you study and work extra hard

but here’s perfect little oikawa who always knocks you down to second place

at first youre like. i’ll just work harder!

and he joins quidditch and so do you

so you try hard at that too

you’re not like a sore loser or anything so when slytherin wins you shake his hand with a smile

but by the end of the year you’re just kinda :/ now because you never see him studying or practicing spells so how the fuck is he BETTER THAN YOU AT EVERYTHING!!! ITS NOT FAIR!!!!!

third year you come into school with like not very good feelings abt oikawa

and your mom was on your ass about your grades and you’re like omfggg im TRYING OKAY IM TRYING SO HARD

too bad tho thats when he starts liking you …

middle of third year is when you start expressing those feelings for oikawa out loud

“i hate self-centered geniuses. come back down to earth, will you.”

he heard you say when test results came back

and hes like is she talking abt me? lol nah shes probably talking about stupid ushijima over there

and then he finds out you were in fact talking abt him

hes kinda hurt lol

then when the new term rolls in

and the two of you just start talking shit about each other and start arguing all the time

“what’s the answer, l/n?”

“fairy wings.”

“oh my bad, i didn’t realize she said oikawa, and not l/n.”

“oh sorry, i thought you wouldn’t know the answer so i answered for you! i saved you from embarrassing yourself. you’re welcome~”

your seatmate yaku was holding you down with all his might and HOW IS LITTLE MAN ABLE TO HOLD YOU BACK HIS GRIP IS STRONG BRO

the whole class s ighs here we go AGAIN

the teacher doesnt even bother sending you guys out to hall anymore because this happens so much

you always try to sabotage each other in potions

one time his eyebrows almost burned off after his potion exploded in his face

makki and mattsun like LMFAOWFEHERGUYER

then when the year ends you’re like ranting to your mom like “i hate geniuses. who does he think he is? just because he can beat me at everything?? i’ll show him. i’ll make him eat dirt in the field. i’ll wipe that dumb smirk off his face. i’ll-”

your mom: omg my little baby so full of hate just like her momma

fourth year you’re so determined to beat oikawa at something

he sees you in the library, unprovoked, once and he comes up from behind you like

“aw, is l/n gonna try beating me again this year? you know there’s no point in trying.”

you: hold it in hold it in hold it in YOU’RE MATURE NOW Y/N L/N. YOU SHOULD BE MORE MATURE THAN THIS DIMWIT IN FRONT OF YOU. inhale exhale inhale exhale

“aw, is oikawa gonna try beating ushiwaka in quidditch again this year? you know there’s no point in trying.”

way to be mature

poor oikawa tho you pressed a wrong button so he just leaves silently

you kinda regret it after

so this year goes like the last and so does the next

“arent you tired?? of competing with oikawa all the time??” your friend semi asked you

“kind of”

“then stop?? you dont have to fulfill your mom’s high school revenge lmao”

“ughh eita i know but im too far in”

one time you were out breaking curfew #savage

no but seriously you couldn’t sleep so you thought some fresh air will help, the dorms were super suffocating right now

you were stressed after your mom’s monthly letter

beat oikawa this beat oikawa that

you turn at a corner and you see the man himself, ALSO BREAKING CURFEW

now the both of you are looking at each other like 👁👄👁

“GOD L/N I THOUGHT YOU WERE A TEACHER I NEARLY DIED FROM A HEART ATTACK”

“shush before we both get caught”

“right sorry sorry”

“so what the hell are you doing breaking curfew.”

“what are you doing breaking curfew.”

“i asked you first”

“so?”

“just answer the question, oikawa.”

he looks around, making sure the coast was clear before he motions you over to him and as you walk towards him

you see the door hes standing in front of

he drags you in there and what you see is

a bunch of practice dummies

“yeah i,, practice my spells here at night. contrary to popular belief i’m not a genius like ushiwaka or tobio. i’m flattered you think so, though.”

and youre like he... actually practices?? he is actually human?

“what’s with that look? you wanna join me practice at night?”

“as if-” and then you see the book of spells and you guys aren’t even learning any of this YET. and you are determined not to fall behind oikawa “sure.”

oikawas like pardon?

you: i SAID SURE.

and so now at night you practice spells together

only because you want to beat him as if

the arguing goes down a little because you get caught up in beating each other at who gets to do the spell right first that practice runs super late sometimes and you dont have energy to fight with each other that early

everybodys like ??? huh????

but then you’re back to the usual bs in the afternoon and everybodys like oh okay so the world isnt ending yet

so anyway !! yall are practicing again

you’re pointing your wand at a practice dummy and trying to focus so you dont accidentally do something dumb

"hey why do you hate me so much?”

LITERALLY CATCHES YOU OFF GUARD AND BREAKS YOUR FOCUS

“it’s not because i hit you when we were first years right? it really was an accident i swear-”

“you still remember that?”

“well yeah… because i cant think of any other reason why you don’t like me.”

“um… trying too hard to please my mom, i guess. what about you? why did you try so hard to beat me at everything?” you ask, regaining your focus for the charm

“idk, you never paid attention to me unless i did.”

you scoff, “why? you don’t like me or anything, do you?”

“i do tho??”

he literally said that just before you chanted the spell and you got caught off guard and

“stupefy!”

it almost hits oikawa

oikawa: WHAT DID I DO

you: SHITHEAD DONT SAY THAT WHEN IM ABOUT TO DO SOMETHFIBEFH

“HOW DID THIS EVEN HAPPEN???”

“I DONT KNOW IT WAS FUN COMPETING WITH YOU WHEN WE WERE SECOND YEARS AND IT JUST DID?? I TRIED SO HARD SO I CAN IMPRESS YOU AND I GUESS MY PLAN BACKFIRED BECAUSE I DONT THINK YOU LIKE ME VERY MUCH”

now youre staring at each other and you’re both red

he kinda quiets down “and you’re a better rival than ushijima anyway. i don’t mean any of the stuff i said, i swear. i know you don’t like me but i just needed to let that out or i will go insane.”

and hes just looking down all shy

at this point you actually dont know if you like oikawa or not

i mean??? you spent like 3 years butting heads with this dude

and he liked you the whole time?? hes crazy this man is crazy.

maybe you were just in denial the whole time

because?? you could’ve stopped competing with him at everything

maybe you did enjoy it somehow

he did make your life at school interesting

“let’s go out on a few dates and we’ll see.”

his head just whips up and his eyes like light up and hes so EXCITED

in the time before you officially started dating

you find out from iwaizumi that even tho he smiles at a lot of girls its actually rarely genuine the only girl hes ever seen oikawa smile about genuinely was you

and that his mom actually didnt approve of him playing quidditch at first because he had a bad knee but he pushed for it because he really wanted to

he has like a smug and a flippant demeanor but hes very attentive and super caring !!

hes super passionate and hard working at what he does and

i guess now you finally realize you are falling

it takes five dates until the two of you officially start going out

if you tell third year you that you were dating oikawa she would never believe it but here you are, walking to class with him

when the two of you walked in the classroom talking

like TALKING NORMALLY AND NOT THE USUAL “i will choke you in your sleep” “ooh, kinda k-” “don’t”

it was already sus when the arguing toned down a bit but now that its like. REALLY GONE?? everybody is so confused

LMFAO matsukawa asks like “what happened?? are you guys broken?”

“no???”

“how rude! dearest y/n and i are dating now!”

everybody in this class: see now thats crazy. that is crazy.

makki: maybe we didnt hear him right. say that again oikawa

oikawa: me and y/n are dating.

everybody: oh okay bc we thought you said you and l/n were dat- WAIT SO YOU AND L/N REALLY ARE TOGETHER??? 

you: unfortunately

oikawa: h-hey :((((

everybody: SO WE DONT GOTTA LISTEN TO YALL ARGUE FIRST THING IN THE MORNING??? YOU HAVE TO TREAT THE WHOLE CLASS TO BUTTERBEER I THINK WE DESERVE IT AFTER THESE THREE YEARS OF CONSTANT YELLING

nobody was as SHOCKED as your moms

“y/n, baby, i know i did not just hear you say you’re dating the oikawa kid. repeat that for momma again.”

“i’m dating the oikawa kid.”

like?? MOM THIS WAS TECHNICALLY UR FAULT

“so toru, what did you wanna tell me?”

“i have a girlfriend now! her name is y/n l/n.”

“l/n? surely not THAT l/n’s daughter, right?”

“oh it is that l/n.”

when your families have dinner together for the first time

THE TENSION LMFAO

but they do try hard to get along. they try super hard.

they start getting along because MAN YOU AND OIKAWA WERE SOO CUTE AND THEY WANT YOU TO GET MARRIED AND THEY HAVE TO GET ALONG IF THEY WANT IT TO HAPPEN. THEIR GRANDKIDS ARE GONNA BE SO CUTE!!!

“ma, we haven’t graduated yet-”

your mom, ignoring you: THEYRE GOING TO HAVE THE CUTEST HAIR

oikawa’s mom: AND THEY’RE GOING TO BE SUPER SMART LIKE THEIR PARENTS!

your mom: AND WE’LL BE THE BEST GRANDMAS.

momma oiks: PERIOD!

steals your books from you in the halls so he can carry it for you

you tease each other with pet names and shit???

he’ll try to kiss your cheek in the hall but iwa grabs the back of his robe and pulls him away “you’re gross”

“you’re just jealous iwa!!”

when your houses arent playing each other, he goes to your games and vice versa!

tries to distract you in the field

“hey beautiful”

“toru don’t or i will make iwa knock you off your broom.”

“you're so mean”

so anyways yall r couple goals

"listen well, kindaichi, kunimi, your senior is showing you how to get girls.”

kunimi, without looking up from his book: what are you gonna teach us? accidentally slap the girl and get her to hate you for three years while you secretly pine over her during that time before confessing that you liked her the whole time and you go out on five dates and officially start dating? too much work

oikawa: LISTEN HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT

[littlebabycrybtch]

tbh... we have absolutely FAILED ppl with ea/ting disor.ders so fucking unimaginably bad, especially the visibly underweight ones. and we are still failing them to this day by avoiding valuable education out of discomfort and demonization. its genuinely appalling sometimes, to see just how Dangerously ignorant ppl are about this shit. bros listen 2 me rn. you are not a doctor, and you are Not going cure an ed with your almost laughably ignorant and malicious ‘reverse psychology’ bit where you call someone an ugly skeleton knocking on deaths door whos body needs to be banned from instagram forever, because you’re just ‘so scared theyre gonna die’ or w/e so you can legit pretend they dont exist, holy fucking Shit dude. that shame-and-shun tactic is so unbelievably dangerous. like, if you knew Anything REAL abt these disorders or frankly any mental health issues and cared enough to apply that then you would understand how thats just... pure cruelty. im sorry to be blunt but yeah this isnt a joke, it needs to be said that you are easily going to KILL SOMEONE with that kind of unfiltered uneducated IGNORANCE. it is inexcusably selfish, harmful, and ableist behavior, we have to stop this already.

imo there’s a Lot to be said about the toxicity spiral thats become the pro recovery movement and how much it rejects and speaks over the people its Supposed to support, becoming more about ‘anti symptoms’ than pro anything, but if you are gonna understand Anything new today at least learn this;;; hating yourself at unhealthy is Never ever going to be the key to loving yourself at healthy. being ashamed of yourself FOR being unhealthy, will NOT make you healthier, it’ll make you worse every time. im not tryna be mean but honestly how the actual FUCK do yalls brains work, it is SO wildly damaging to let yourself perpetuate this type of mindset, and then still claim pro recovery or w/e like recovery doesnt have to start at unhealthy??? like itll just happen overnight??? like that’ll help??? like if ppl catch you displaying symptoms of the disorder you LITERALLY HAVE, you arent allowed to talk abt it in any form without intense open negativity towards it and yourself, so ppl know ur definitely totally against it tho and not enabling urself, bc if you dont talk abt ur shame and embarrassment for it that means you arent recovering and need a mob after you??? thats how you think people are gonna get better????

ffs dont try to viciously shame yourself out of bad habits and treat your disorders like taboo, respect and love yourself wholly, the good and the bad, if you want to form better habits!!! ppl NEED to be encouraged to love themselves at unhealthy if they ever want to improve. you are not going to accidentally make them worse by not constantly shaming all their ‘flaws’, they are not MADE of ‘flaws’. by showing support for the mentally ill, you are not fucking supporting their ‘symptoms’, you are a supporting THE FUCKING PERSON EXPERIENCING THEM. and you DESPERATELY NEED TO DO THAT!! there is MORE TO THEM than their symptoms! there are things to COMPLIMENT them on besides their body! its gotten to this point that like. ppl are actually Afraid of just being nice to ppl with eds. they dont even wanna treat them like Humans outside of their disorder, all they see is a disorder. everyone is just SO afraid of ‘enabling’ them by not being vocally against their symptoms that they avoid them like the plague and dont even try to build them up, which is what they fucking need more than anything dude!! 

ppl think refusing to ever let an underweight person feel pretty or love their body where they are at is what they need and will force them to recover, or they think giving them goals like ‘you’ll be so much happier with a bigger body’ and ‘keep going one day you wont look so sick’ is at all different than their own internal dialogue, when the Truth (that people need to fucking know by now!), is that shame with mental health is incredibly dangerous, eds are diverse but theyre most often rooted in starvation as a form of self harm from an unwavering self hatred and feeling of failure or lack of control, one they already have deeply ingrained and will usually feel at Any Size, which is why so many feel unsatisfied and keep going and going till they die. the answer to this problem isnt gonna be inflicting more fucking self hate or pressure. thats gasoline on a fire. you cannot just try and. UNO REVERSE CARD THE ~RULES~ OF THEIR FUCKING MENTAL DISORDER and expect RECOVERY... oh my god dude, please, id laugh out loud if this wasnt so malicious.

listen, if you wanna help, like actually Care about Helping the way you claim the root of your attitude is, you need to make that person feel like they can love themselves, not try to make them ‘realize’ how ‘bad’ they are and how uncomfortable and scared they make you and how Not Allowed their behavior is, bc 1. body dysmorphia is a delusion,,, denial is a common association with addictive/self destructive behaviors,,,, you are going about it wrong if thats the first thing you try to accomplish, and 2. whether you like it or not ‘bad’ is gonna be your first checkpoint! who would be motivated to get better when all you’re doing is giving them an already failing grade and pushing them back??? 

you’re all just... so paralyzed by ignorant fear every time you interact with someone with an ed bc you are so fucking detached from it as a concept, but you wont LEARN how to BEHAVE AROUND THESE PPL! LIKE! and then you claim you act this way ‘because you care'. ok then why do you feel like you dont have to listen or learn??? why dont you see these tactics as needlessly cruel when its explained??? bc oh you cant ‘’’’’trust’’’’ ppl with eds to tell You how to help Them, right??? they’re probably lying, you know better than them ofc. smhhh, every other mental illness community gets to speak for themselves to the ppl without their experiences and therefore the ability to hurt them, sure, but not the sneaky ed people, they created pr.0/a.na/, (the ONLY existing space for encouraging mentally ill ppl in self destructive behaviors, obviously), so they dont know what they need, they have to be Told by Normal people bc their irrational brains are Just Too Broken. (/s)............ like.............?? it is Sooo fuckin prejudiced and disgusting tbh. we gotta do better than this. 

eds are almost completely left out of communities for mental health these days. its seriously so disappointing. if you ACTUALLY ‘care’, then ok you need to swallow your pride and do better, you need to Listen and not let your personal discomforts (genuine triggers excluded!) with their appearance or behaviors get in the way of how humanized and committed your decent treatment of their disorder is. tbr, sometimes you arent just ‘concerned’ about a person, sometimes how you go about your feelings is rooted in your inner urge to validate your own discomforts with them, which means it might end up more about you than about them, which hurts them. i mean for the love of god, these ppl are not ‘irresponsible’ for existing around others with their ~unhealthy bodies~, they are not a walking trigger and cant be treated like one, they arent contagious, they will not benefit mentally from hearing you say you think they should be physically banned from posting selfies or w/e, that isolation WONT prevent eds from ~~~spreading~~~ and will severely harm the person in question, you are not making a heroic decision to try and bully them away to ‘save’ others from ever being around them or save them from being around an “enabling” (supportive recovery/not shameful) community. you are not ‘fixing’ them by making them hate their underweight bodies. you’re LITERALLY just ignorant and prejudiced and ableist, your ideas are actually Very harmful, you are not a savior, you are making it worse, plain and simple. Please just start doing better already, its kind of a life or death situation here