#like you could delete facebook or snapchat or even instagram

[allthegothihopgirls]

i hate tiktok i hate short-form video content i hate tiktok 'influencers' i hate herd mentality i hate it oh my god

[corrodedcoughin]

hi anna i hope you're doing well <3 i wanted to share a bit about my experience with burn out from your recent post. last year I was attending school and a lot of big moments were happening in my personal life. all of that plus the workload, commute, etc. left me feeling burnt out to the point of severe depression :/ your body is constantly tired and you just feel empty regardless of how your try to surround yourself with good things. could be people or food or music or a show but once you feel utterly wrung out, it's hard to feel much of anything else. i know for me it kind of manifested in unhealthy habits to just kind of quickly get through the day, a shot sleep schedule, and for me to start obsessing over little crap that really wasn't all that important. all my time was being used to work or overthink myself into a panic and it just made me feel completely isolated from family, friends, peers, and i left that term feeling stupid and useless.

the best way i try to go around my burnout is for one, to not push myself through it. yeah it all seems hopeless now but is my problem today gonna be the same in a month? a year? i try to think outside the present moment because sometims you might not even realize you have tunnel vision until you actually get out of the tunnel.

my hobbies are still gonna be there when i want to enjoy them but my body and health are what need to be my first priority. a lot of my hobbies were related to tumblr/ao3 or just being online in general so I decided to quit. for around three months I stayed off my socials and deleted apps like tiktok and instagram and decided to stick to the least attention grabbing apps i like. even then i made an effort to stay off my phone as long as i could. it may sound kinda dumb but lowering screentime actually really does help reduce anxiety and i find i don't miss those apps at all.

and for me my burnout was largely being caused from school and I realized that this wasn't the right path for me at all. so i quit because nothing, no matter how seemingly important, should make me feel so horrible. I mean it's not even sadness or exhaustion it's emptiness. you feel nothing and everything and it aches and you just end up ruining all the good things you have by trying to ignore it and push through.

another thing that helped was finding stuff for me to do in my personal life whether that was getting a new job, cleaning the house, cooking a meal, or finding a new love for movies. I prioritized myself and i feel good. It took me about 6 months but I got there and it's worth it. I don't feel isolated or as exhuasted as before and life feels good again, my hobbies feel good again.

I hope you know you're not alone when it comes to feeling this way and i hope you take care 💌 happy easter or just have a happy april

Hello! I’m going to put a bunch of stuff under a read more but before I do that I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you for taking the time to even notice/read the things i posted and then writing this. I’m so, so glad that you are feeling better now and that you were able to do that for yourself. It sounds like you really figured out what you needed and it worked and knowing that it does work is so reassuring. So just thank you. For being kind to me and to yourself and sharing. I’m so glad you are here and if you ever want to talk be it silly or serious, my dms are always open.

You are so completely right about social media. I’ve had Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat deleted for a couple of years now. Covid pushed me over the edge with them and the relief of not having them there anymore is incredible. I have tiktok but go on it maybe for a week straight then don’t touch it for a few months. Idk it’s not great at holding my interest.

But yeah tumblr has been a bit of a difficulty for me, hence the dropping out for days at a time. Keeping up with things/engaging and needing to do it ‘right’ is so much more mentally straining than you realise until it’s just one more thing to push you over the edge. Even when I wasn’t replying to messages/asks I would be online trying to keep at track of things so I could ‘do my reblogging duty right’ when I eventually did feel good enough mentally to come back and it’s so STUPID. like!!! Nobody cares if I interact with their posts!! Nobody!!! I just internalised and spiralled a bunch of things from other parts of my life into here too!

Work has been really bad for at least six months now and it’s so hard. Then self doubt over looking into Autism and other mental health stuff as well as gender and trying to keep up with the gym and step targets and feeling bad for not being social every single hour of my day like my very extroverted brother has just really pushed me down into a hole. You don’t realise how many things are going on until they smack you over like a wave and then it’s like ‘oh boy, I can’t get up. And I don’t want to because I’ll just be pushed down again’

Eventually I started just taking my car down to the sea and reading a physical book instead of being online. It’s helped. It’s not sorted things but it’s helped.

My hobbies are primarily online too so I have an idea of where you are coming from, won’t say I understand because everyone is different but I get it. The temptation really IS to push through. I actually said to my only coworker ‘I just need to make it to the end of April. Then I can think about getting signed off if I /really/ need to but I won’t. It’ll be fine’ I don’t know why!! The job doesn’t care back!

I won’t bore you with all the details but it’s been Wild and knowing that you got through the other side is genuinely a light at the end of the tunnel. So thank you for sharing your experience. School is so hard, the first time I went I had to leave for mental health reasons or face hospital admission. I mean it when I say I’m so proud of you for making that decision. Truly. I wish you nothing but ease for the next section of your life, you deserve it. I hope you’ve found a new favourite movie or genre or just general joy in the new hobby! Would love to hear more about that or absolutely anything you have to say, your words are very easy to read and hold a lot of happiness in them. Thank you again and good luck with your new job if you have one or the search if you are looking!

[boba-beom]

DING DING DING! congrats! you are correct!

it's one way for me to socialize with you guys because of

(1) how fast you guys are speaking in discord (ngl i kinda feel left out a lot of times) especially with me waking up to find 200-1000 comments that i have to mute the group chat worrying about my phone battery

(2) how i live on the other side of the world so i can't to you guys as much without losing sleep.

other than that, i hope you learn more about me.

also, me only using youtube and tumblr as my social media platforms is because of the bad relationship i had with others social media platforms. i don't use tiktok at all because of the oversaturation and seeing people around me obsessing about tiktok challenges that it turns me off from joining. i also quit instagram because i use to compare myself with others, even with my friend circle. i also have other social medias like snapchat, facebook, and others i couldn't think about but deleted it because i don't use them anymore, while i used to be active on kpop stan twt before the toxicity comes to me but i still own it because it relates to the monthly minecraft event that i watched lmao. so i delete social media to detox myself and delete myself form the internet as best as i could so that people could only find me based on my internet persona.

i am back on instagram but purely so that i could open a portfolio page for the gfx designs i made for my hellsite fics and others...

do you have any leftover questions you want me to answer???

p.s. hope you're having fun with the cloudbusting fic you're planning. ngl i didn't think you'll be doing it for real hehe

-🐝

WHOOP I knew my inkling was right! it wouldn't leave me :>

I understand and I'm sorry about that :< I know the group chat blows up so much and time zones are difficult but we do love having you there when you come on! <3

I have definitely learnt a lot about you , considering we have a google spread with all the hits you gave us collectively hehe I get where you're coming from in terms of social media and I think if that's what helps and is better for you then it that's good, you know? I had a social media detox at one point too with only tumblr being my only social but I've been alright everywhere, I just usually dip after I go on it. sometimes social media isn't for everything so I understand!

no question actually, but I just wanna say that you answering your own anon ask threw me off because that was the only thing that held me back from not suspecting you hehe it was fun nonetheless!

I just can't believe that I was super late to catch on that bee is in beabadoobee T^T things came to pretty late because I was busy with family, friends and packing the past week but literally the other night I managed to give myself time to search, link and piece together these things :> it was fun honestly, really pieced these things at 2AM hehe

OMG so I watched palm springs and it's interesting, I just don't know if I would make a long fic based on the movie, a short scenario from the movie (like when the song comes on, but idk how I would write about that without writing a long fic) or I'll just listen to the song and figure out what scenario to write about, but from listening to it a few times it does sound dreamy. still just gonna think of a scenario :> I'll figure it out ^^

thanks again lissie it was fun getting to interact with you this way! just know that you're very much loved in the gc! and in general, you're amazing and so are your works, it's an acquired taste <3

[jourdynarmstrong]

I enjoyed listening to Max Strossel talk and reading Emma Rathbone’s article. Max offered a lot of insight into how much social media controls us. I really liked when he said “Are we using social media or is social media using us?” It is crazy, and kind of scary, to think of it from that perspective. Rathbone’s article was just fun! Each of the different examples of silly things to do “before the internet”. It took me back to when I was younger. You had to use your imagination and be creative to entertain yourself. It seems so much more rewarding that way.

I think these two sources were meant to be eye-openers about the effect of social media. But, it wasn’t very eye-opening to me. I started figuring these things out on my own about 9 months ago. I was never a social media junkie but I found myself scrolling through Instagram to see the reels (I never jumped on the tik tok band wagon) or refreshing Snapchat to watch people’s stories and I got sick of it. One day, without hesitation, I deleted Instagram and Snapchat. I haven’t gone back. I still have Facebook so that I can stay “relevant” and keep up with family and friends through that app. But, I set my time limit to one hour a day. Sometimes I go over that on days that seem to drag on, but for the most part I try to stick to that limit and stay away from social media as much as possible. It has been refreshing. I read more, and I’m more focused on school, work, and relationships. I feel like I have grown a lot as a person since I deleted those apps, and I’m not just saying that. It is very true.

About a year and a half ago (while I still had Instagram and Snapchat), I travelled to Belgium with my boyfriends family for two weeks. None of us had cell service while there unless we were “home” and connected to WiFi. It was awesome! We talked a lot and spent a lot of quality time together. Again, it was refreshing. Social media wasn’t even an option and we had so much fun. We played games. It was like being a kid again, unaffected, “before the internet”. I’ll share a picture of my boyfriend and his brothers pulling their Grandpa on a rope swing. We all took turns and did this for hours with people ranging from under ten years old to their Grandpa in his 60’s. It was so much fun and I don’t think any of us were even thinking about our phones. We just enjoyed the moment. This is a very fond memory from that trip!

I would say that I have already done things to be more intentional about my social media use. I could definitely still use it less than I do (I’m talking about Facebook), but I am pretty happy with where I am at. Facebook is still social media, but I keep up with people that don’t use other social media and I find a lot of useful information there like articles or job information. I am very glad that I deleted the other apps. I spend my time much more efficiently now. At times when I would usually scroll Instagram, I pull out a book or do homework, or go outside, or play games with friends and family. All things that are much more captivating and rewarding to spend my time doing. I highly recommend it!!!😀

[theresa-of-liechtenstein]

whenever i get sucked into a conversation with someone or other from high school (which is what happened to me this evening) i always wind up answering more questions than i get to ask. for the longest time i thought this must mean i was a horrible self-centered conversationalist but something i realized while i was in the shower is that it genuinely could be because i’m a recluse. i never had social media throughout high school and i was only publicly (aka could be found and recognized) on instagram for a year before i got fed up with it and deleted that account entirely. i never saw the point of the bereal fad, i’m not on facebook, i’m not on snapchat, and i’m definitely, definitely no longer on tiktok (and i only did cosplay videos and the like for a few months on there!) the only social media i have been consistently active on is this one which only has like three active irls (and you know who you are). most people genuinely do not know what i do in my personal life so the only way they can find out is if i happen to appear and they can catch me to ask. and that’s why all my conversations turn into interviews. not because i’m some egoist but i could be that mysterious and elusive. brb going to revel in this 😎😎

[techtired]

How to Spy on iPhone Without Access to Target Phone?

Modern parenting often involves setting boundaries for phone usage, such as screen time limits and ensuring children access age-appropriate content. However, with busy schedules, parents may struggle to monitor their kids' iPhones thoroughly, including checking call logs, reading messages, and tracking their movements. Fortunately, Msafely, a web-based phone monitoring app, simplifies this process by allowing parents to remotely view phone activity and location history from a single dashboard. Msafely lets you spy on iPhones, so you know what kids do on their phones anytime and anywhere. The user-friendly monitoring app, Msafely, offers robust features for tracking call logs, web browsing history, and location without accessing the target device. This helps parents monitor their children's behaviour and whereabouts for timely guidance and safety. This post will explore how to use Msafely to monitor your child's iPhone securely. You'll learn how to track the websites they visit and their location. Let's dive in! What is the Msafely Phone Monitor Solution? Msafely is a powerful phone monitoring tool for secretly monitoring your kids' devices. The parental control application works invisibly, letting you spy on what kids are doing on their phones without them knowing. Moreover, the phone monitoring solution for parents works smoothly on Android and iPhone. Therefore, regardless of whether your child is a phone model, you can monitor their activity anytime through an easy-to-use parental control app. Msafely Phone Monitor Solution Features To understand why Msafely is your best app to spy on kids' iPhones, let us review its features. Phone Activity Tracker for iPhone As more research shows the negative impacts of excessive phone usage, experts recommend supervising and limiting phone use for children. Msafely lets you monitor the app usage, phone calls, and messages on your kid’s phone. 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The Msafely location tracker also has a geo-fencing feature, so you receive alerts whenever your child is not in designated areas. You can contact your child for an explanation and counsel them against visiting such locations whenever you receive such alerts. Social Media App Tracker Cyberbullying and leaking sensitive information are some of the dangers your child is prone to when using social media applications. Moreover, children could be exposed to inappropriate content sent to them by strangers or even their friends through social media applications. By actively monitoring your child’s communication through social media apps using Msafely, you protect them from online dangers. Msafely is a high-quality parental control application offering you valuable assistance so you can effectively protect your child from potential risks associated with social media usage. You can use Msafely to monitor who your child communicates with on social media applications such as Instagram, Snapchat, and Facebook. Further, you can review their posts, comments, likes and replies to social media posts. WhatsApp Tracker for iPhone Msafely lets you monitor your kid's WhatsApp messages effectively. You can view their private and group messages on WhatsApp using the application. You will discover the photos, videos, messages, and documents they share through WhatsApp. The Msafely WhatsApp tracker lets you view their contact list without jailbreak. Once you find your children chatting with suspicious strangers, you can stop them quickly. For instance, you can know when they share sensitive information, such as their current location and home address and warn them against doing so. Screen Time and Schedule Tracker Excessive phone usage could have adverse effects on your child’s health. Moreover, unsupervised kids could spend so much time on their phones and fail to attend to essential assignments. Therefore, as a parent, you need to track their screen time and even set a schedule so they do not use the device at certain times, such as bedtime, school, etc. Msafely is a safe and secure monitoring app with scheduling features. Therefore, you can use Msafely to schedule restrictions and ensure children do not spend excessive time on their digital devices. Installed Apps Tracker Using Msafely, parents can check the applications installed on their kids' iPhones. Typically, the iPhone tracker provides insights such as the app version and download time and comes with blocking features so you can block your kids from potentially harmful applications and games. Discreet Phone Monitoring Application When you start using Msafely, no application or icon is left on the target phone. Thus, your child will not be suspicious that you are monitoring their messages, screen time, or location. You can review their natural conduct and offer guidance and counselling whenever they act differently than expected or visit restricted areas. How To Use Msafely To Spy on iPhone Without Accessing Target Phone You can set up Msafely phone tracking on your iPhone in simple steps. Here are the steps to follow: Step1. Register a Msafely Account Please register for a Msafely account, which is your first step towards accessing their services. Start using your valid email address, which will serve as your primary contact and login credential for the account. Step2. Choose a Suitable Plan and Connect your phone Msafely offers different user plans tailored to suit everyone's needs. Select your ideal user plan and follow the prompts to add your target device. Step3. Start Monitoring You can begin the monitoring with Ase with the target device(s) added and log into the log user dashboard using the email address you registered with. This dashboard is your command centre - where you can view activity logs, set up alerts, and manage your monitoring devices. Conclusion Msafely is the ultimate parental control application for modern-day phone tracking. Parents can actively review their child’s messages on social media applications, call logs, and even location in real-time using the application. The easy-to-use phone monitoring app has a web-based dashboard for secure and easy access anytime and from anywhere. Download your Msafely phone tracking app today and monitor your child’s iPhone usage. Read the full article

[starjxsung]

A lot happen last night

It was raining and it was so humid I felt to icky and when I came back from running my errands I just wanted to be in front of my air conditioner and then later that night We had a tornado watch and it just had me anxious all night I had to take a sleeping pill to be able to go to sleep

The second thing that happened was my brother called and said that my sister in law and niece did not like that my brother was sending us pictures of our nephew like it’s understandable when posting on Facebook, instagram, tik tok and stuff like we understand that well my sisters and I my mom on the other hand still doesn’t understand the risks of social media and having kids on their as much as we tell her to not post him on facebook and tik tok it always ends in arguments but other than that my brother has been sending us pictures of my nephew because we live miles away from him we don’t see him all the time so it kind of feels sad that my sister in law and niece don’t want us to see our nephew…

Third I wanted to catch up with this guy who was friends with the guy I was talking to a while back and well it was going good until I asked if anything was new and it ended up with him telling me he was lonely, lonely as he has no girlfriend and I don’t watch stories on Snapchat but his story was just him complaining about women and etc and it bothered me mostly because a while back he tried to flirt with me and then kept asking questions that I didn’t want to answer because I wasn’t comfortable in telling him and then he’ll ask for pictures of me and when we were good we would send selfies but then after he would ask for them and it kinda just made me uncomfortable that I even took him off of him viewing my stories when I’ll post a selfie and I’m thinking of just cutting communication with him

-🩶

OMGGGG I’VE BEEN HEARING ABOUT THE TORNADOS…… are you okay???? That sounds so scary like my coworker was telling me that the tornado sirens kept him up all night and I was like. HUH 😭😭

Also why would they be mad about him sending pics? I totally get posting them on social media and stuff but they just don’t like that he’s texting you pics?? That’s so strange ☹️ I’m sure he has good reasoning but I just don’t get it like at least it’s not anywhere public you know….

EWWWW NOT THE ASKING FOR PICS 🤢🤢 I’m so sorry that happened to you UGH I don’t know why some men are literally incapable of talking to women without asking for pics like you could literally just be random acquaintances that they don’t gaf about and they’ll STILL ask for pics 🫠 I block a guy every time he does that except for when it happened w my ex and I still regret sending him pics SOOOO bad to this day like the fact that those are just on his phone and he probably never deleted them. Kms actually

Anyways you were smart to take him off viewing your stories so that he doesn’t ask for more. I would definitely consider cutting off communication just so that he doesn’t continue making you uncomfortable ☹️ obviously it’s your choice in the end but it’s gross that he would try taking advantage of you like that 🤢 icky behavior

I love you bby take care of yourself!!!!!! I’m literally hugging u so hard rn and kissing u and squeezing you ILYYYYYYY ❤️❤️❤️🩷💞💕💘💘💓💗❣️

[foxbox21212]

Social media makes me so sad. It just feels so sad, cold, and industrial. Especially instagram maybe because of how empty and vain it is in general. People used to do it to express themselves now it feels like girls compete with eachother for guys. And if a girl feels like she has to do that I can guarantee you that guy doesn’t give a fuck about you lol. Then they attract these horrible douche bags and wonder why they’re miserable. Kind of ironic honestly. See it literally all the time though with people I know and influencers. Or they use it even as a popularity contest. Buying up fake followers and bots. Which is honestly sad if you feel like you have to do that. I can’t even stand being on there feels fucking weird to me. I wish I would be that cool to dip off of social media and do my own thing. Perhaps one day. Tbh I kind of already have but haven’t deleted the old stuff yet. Like I could definitely say goodbye to instagram, Snapchat, twitter, and facebook. Tumblr and YT is forever though. I know a few people like that though who don’t have anything they are actually goals.

I knew this girl one time she would only post pictures of clouds on instagram. Stuff like that is interesting to me. Because it’s like, here you are, not giving a f what people think of you. Just out here posting what you love. I like the photography aspect but it’s just hard because lines get blurred. Between what’s real and fake. Girls photoshop 24/7 or even use video editing stuff too. Just so fake now. Or the sexual stuff they try forcing in your face too. Makes me feel sick honestly. I don’t get how people live like that.

Like picture this, we live in times so immodest that people don’t even know what modesty is anymore. It’s like a relic of the past. All they know is take your clothes off for guys and money. You don’t need respect for yourself, no one will ever love you unless you do that is essentially what social media teaches people/children. You will never be smart enough to have an interesting career or career that actually benefits the world, hence take off your clothes. Society is brainwashed. Oh ya also like what 60%? Of young girls have eating disorders now lol. Nothing is real.

[suckmybigtoeoikawa]

Haikyuu boys posting you on their socials

- so like imagine little things they would post on their social media about you

Suna, Kenma, oikawa, atsumu (literally my faves)

************* ***************** *******

Suna

you never get to be left alone he’s always recording you

you could be napping, on your phone, eating something he’s gonna post jt on his stories: twitter, instagram, snapchat, facebook:/

he just loves you so much :(

one time you’ll never forget is this one time when you were napping and he was recording you

you woke up from a cold sweat only to find suna phone right in your face. He sees your eyes open and quickly runs off and even falls on the way.

“SUNA WHAT THE FUCK”

all you hear is him laughing hella hard.

everything was recorded, even him falling

he wants to document everything because he wants to come back and look at the good times you had

he comes up to you something and says “remember this” and proceeds to show you a old picture of you guys in high school

makes your heart melt, you love it so much

but then he shows you a photo of you sleeping and drool coming out your mouth

he posts it on twitter and says “i love her so much :))”

he’s so crazy if you comment under the post he’s gonna tease you even on the post

[your.name] you gotta be kidding me i hate you sm

[Sunnaaa] you weren’t saying that in your sleep… or even last night :/

[your.name] IMMA KILL YOU

the fans are jealous:)

Kenma

Literally everyone knows you guys are dating and if they don’t they must not be on social media :/

all of his fans know who you are and they love to see you

but he usually posts like pictures of you two holding hands or something

or like if your shopping he’ll secretly take a picture of you

if you guys record he video it’s usually funny stuff

like you saying something weird

“what did you say?” Kenma smirks

“i said my ass is falling off” you frown moving your head up from the vegetables you were cutting and stare right into the camera making this face

“delete that shit.”

he posted it anyways and now it’s a running meme

whenever he streams and someone donates to him it plays that sound “mY AsS iS FaLliNg OfF”

other than that you often show up in his insta stories

he likes to keep your personal life private unless you want it out there, he doesn’t mind

y’all basically post pictures that everyone finds sweet

they look at those photos and their like “omg I WANT 👹”

maybe started a hashtag saying “if i don’t have a relationship like kodzuken.. then i don’t want it :/”

Oikawa

probably lots of tik toks 💀

he wants to show off his pretty baby so bad :((

so he’ll post on his instagram pictures of you smiling and looking all pretty

he cherishes them photos stg

the captions of the photos be so cute

little compliments like “she’s so pretty” or like “my beauty” (idk either :/)

the tik tok you guys make are really cute

y’all would probably do this thing we’re you guys do little “vlogs”

like kind of like a what y’all do in a day, and it just shows where y’all go and the cute things you do while a really relaxing song is playing in the back

so cute :(((

but he loves to show you off, another couple where its like if you don’t know you guys are dating then are you really on the internet 🤨

Atsumu

y’all are so fucking childish i swear

literally pranking people with pregnancy scares

he posts on his story you looking pretty most of the time and then when you look the worst bro i swear

the whole world knows what you look like in both

cause one minute it will be a picture of you smiling and posing for the camera, then it’s you on the toilet bro

KILL HIM :)

take his rights away i swear cause he’s crazy

if y’all get into a small disagreement he’ll go to instagram or something and say “y/n’s being mean again :(”

everyone just rolls their eyes, they’re tired for you

y’all have a tik tok page and you mainly run it and you prank him a lot, it’s really cute y’all do a lot of cute things

but atsumu takes that shit to seriously sometimes

you decided to do a tik too prank on your boyfriend, it was the prank where you text him “ you can come over now he left” prank ans Atsumu reaction was.. very dramatic

this dude rlly was hanging onto the window ceil outside your window just to see who would come in and the security cameras caught a very funny photo.

“ATSUMU WHAT THE FUCK”

“YOUR CHEATING ON ME HUH?!”

you had to have a long ass talk with him about why you wouldn’t cheat cause he was being petty

but yeah, really does adore you he find your beautiful in your best and worst and wants to share SOME of it with the world.. cause yk your his.. only a lil bit >:(

****

lemme try to start posting more.. but i’m thinking about doing an event sooo yeah :)

Masterlist

hope you enjoyed it 🤍 Please Like, comment what you think and follow 🤍 have a great day 🤍

[cinnamonest]

All modern genshin boys use 4chan. Except Zhongli ofc

Zhongli uses Facebook and gets caps lock stuck on and can't figure out how to turn it off 😔

They do all use 4chan BUT ALSO you know what I have thoughts on this and I'm subjecting you all to them:

Childe and Venti use Instagram a lot. Venti attention whores on Instagram. All the time. Like posts a selfie with irrelevant comments vaguely implying he had a bad day or something is wrong, but when people ask what he's just like "no no it's nothing" and only finally tells once he has a sufficient amount of attention.

Childe overshares. He's the dude that feels the need to broadcast every moment of his life on insta. Like my dude no one cares. Also abuses Snapchat. So many black screen rants. Updates his story 5 times a day. And it's all whining about having no gf and thus his life is sad.

Xingqiu uses Twitter and he gets into Twitter discourse on a daily basis. Like. Literally the instant there's drama of any kind he's all over it even if it's in a community he has never interacted with before. Enjoys Twitter fights for the sake of it.

Chongyun also uses Twitter but it's the opposite, he's so nice. All he ever does is leave nice comments on people's art and selfies. Also 100% simps for some Twitter egirls. Whites knights for them too. Angel.

Bennett honestly sticks to the mindless entertainment that is TikTok, and has friends on discord. He keeps away from most socials. The last 3 times he joined a social media site someone hacked his accounts.

Diluc uses Reddit no I do not accept criticism. He trauma dumps unintentionally onto random threads. Like "oh yeah my dad liked that game before he died brutally" then continues on as if he didn't just dump that information all over the internet. Shares way too much personal information in general, if anyone he knows irl ever finds his account he's screwed bc you could easily pin it to him by how much information he doesn't hesitate to give out. Is subbed to the standard subs and many many gonewild subs. It cures his loneli™

Albedo also uses Reddit and is literally. The most obnoxious. Bastard. He's one of the pretentious redditors. Have you ever used reddit and left a single short comment with an opinion or idea, or maybe a statement that was not 100% right, and someone responds with a 5 point essay on why you're not only wrong but a complete ignorant buffoon? And it's not even on something important it's like "what brand of this is best" or some bullshit? That's him. Unironically pulls "to be fair you have to have a high IQ to understand Rick and Morty"

Xiao still uses Tumblr. He uses it a lot less now bc he was originally on it for porn. He makes the posts that are just "." But then vents in the tags but like, he makes those posts on an everyday basis when he's sad at 3 am then deletes them the next morning. He's also on 4chan a lot.

Scara uses 4chan the most. Active /pol/ user. Actively takes joy in being as much of an asshole as possible. Takes joy in the suffering of others bc it makes him feel better about his own life.

Xiao is the one posting the greentext stories with the > format, telling of his daily failings. Scara is the guy that leaves super negative comments and has absolutely nothing constructive to say. They have absolutely interacted on multiple occasions. Xiao laments about how he tried and failed to speak more than 2 words to this cute cashier that works at the place he goes to every day (complete with depressed wojak for thread image) and of course Scara is there to be like "ahaha you fucking pussy" when he's literally just as much of an incel shut-in as he is

There's also some dude on the same incel-y threads as them. Lamenting that he's not like the rest of you losers, no he's pretty and tall, but something about his personality drives the foids away?? Why must he suffer so. He shouldn't even be here he says, he's not the type of loser that uses 4chan, but he overshares and regrets it whenever he goes on anything else, blah blah. Scara and Xiao both kinda bully the poor bastard bc how dare he be tall. Anyway, yes Kaeya is a 4chan user

[wendyalas]

The Internet...

used to be a cool and safe place. Maybe not entirely safe. Maybe not safe at all. It’s always been dangerous, addictive, distracting but more so today than ever.

Social media used to be better back in the day. Going back 20 years ago or so, you could actually make good connections and meet interesting cool people in forums and MySpace, even on Tumblr.

Then Facebook happened, followed by Twitter, then Instagram, Snapchat, etc. Everyone joined in. It seems like people cannot live without it now. Even our parents and grandparents have and cannot live without Facebook. 

I deleted my Facebook around spring/summer of 2020. Perhaps I found the arguments a bit overwhelming. It’s not that I don’t like confrontation, it’s just that I find debating with people who are set on their minds extremely discouraging. I found myself disliking people I used to like and feeling more depressed about the state of the world. I realized the internet was not a safe place to hide from people anymore, because everyone was home all the time, everyone was on the internet... all the time. 

I’m still on the internet all the time. I check my instagram daily. I go on twitter daily. I don’t always engage. Sometimes I just lurk or share funny memes as stories, but I stay away from debates, not because I’m afraid to stand up for my values, but because I find negativity overwhelming. I’m a vulnerable sponge and absorb feelings/vibes easily. I want to feel okay, so that I can function in my every day life.

Before the internet, I found reading to be my safe place. My hiding place. I am glad that it’s a place that it still exists for many. 

You may ask if I ever get FOMO? I thought I would before the pandemic, but haven’t since I left. I found that the real genuine friends, still reached out to me, still communicated via instagram, or text. The people that matter and that I matter to, will personally invite me via text if they want me to be there. 

It’s also nice to have that privacy and not knowing everything about other people. Yes, people still share their lives on instagram but I find it less overwhelming, I also follow people that I want to follow and not feel forced to engaged with family members, high school classmates that I have nothing in common with except disagreements. 

It’s been nice posting here even if it’s just a stream of consciousness journal entry.

[iclaimedtobethebetterbard]

confiding over cuddles

Fandom: Sanders Sides Characters: Logan, Virgil, background Roman & Remus. Rating: Teen & up Relationships: Analogical, both pre-relationship and during the relationship.  Warnings: Language. First scene has mentions of being outed, religious homophobia, the implication of the f-slur having been used (the actual word is never on the page), and could maybe come across as critical of Christianity although I intend it more as critical of the homophobia. All of this is kept vague and not gone into in great detail. In the second scene, there are a couple of lines that are implied to be suggestive, but no other warnings. Word count: 4657

Read on AO3!

My writing masterpost

Starlight Universe masterpost

analogical week 2021 start - previous - here - next - masterpost

Summary: Throughout the years, vulnerability has always been easiest for Virgil and Logan while cuddling.

Notes: Day 3 of Analogical Week 2021! @analogicalweek Yes, I’m posting it a day late, but I technically finished it before midnight last night, lol. Takes place in my Starlight Universe, does not need context to read.  Remus uses he/they pronouns in this universe. 

part 1 - nightmares “Virgil?” Logan said quietly, looking up from the textbook he’d spread open on the floor of Virgil’s dorm room.

Virgil flinched, startled in spite of the soft tone and not too eager for conversation. “What?” he mumbled, dragging his headphones off one ear. He wasn’t actually listening to anything—he’d put them on to avoid conversation—but apparently now they were having a conversation anyway.

“I’m sorry if I am overstepping, but you don’t seem like you’re doing okay.” Logan looked up at him with wide, earnest dark brown eyes. “If there is anything I can do to help, I would really like to.”

Virgil heaved a sigh, considering his options. He hadn’t had time to cancel their normal study session, and when Logan had picked up on his distress at the beginning of the visit, Virgil had insisted it was fine and Logan didn’t have to leave. Logan had taken him at his word and settled in, sprawling on Virgil’s floor while Virgil curled up on his bed and hugged his pillow, avoiding homework and everything else too, to wallow about—well. The reason he would have canceled if he’d had five minutes’ more notice.

On the one hand, it was kind of personal, and Logan was a good enough friend (not a crush, not a crush, not a crush—) that he’d certainly be understanding if Virgil said he didn’t want to talk about it.

On the other hand, Logan had offered to help, and the opportunity to seek comfort from a pretty, thoughtful boy with nice hair and eyes and lips and hands and—but this wasn’t a crush, so none of that mattered, obviously—well, regardless, it was a tempting opportunity.

“Can I talk about it?” Virgil asked in a voice that came out smaller and more vulnerable than he intended.

Logan nodded at once, closing his textbook and climbing to his knees. “Is it okay if I come up there?”

Virgil nodded, patted the space on the bed beside himself, and scooted over to make room. Logan joined him, clambering onto the bed and laying down beside him with a good few inches of space between them, propping his chin up on his elbows. “What’s up?” he asked, focusing all his attention on Virgil.

This close proximity had the unintended side effect of shorting out Virgil’s brain for a solid three seconds. “Uh.” He tore his eyes away from Logan’s face. “I… so I have this friend, right? He used to be my best friend. When we were kids. I haven’t really talked to him at all in a few years.”

Logan nodded.

“So, uh.” Virgil hesitated, fidgeting with his phone. “I guess somebody outed me to him. And he wasn’t okay about it.”

Logan sucked in a concerned hiss of air, half-reaching for Virgil’s shoulder and stopping himself partway through the motion. “Are you okay?”

Virgil nodded on instinct, thought about it, and then shook his head. “He texted me out of the blue about it and offered to pray for me.” His voice shook. “And I—I told him no thanks, I like being gay.” He swiped aimlessly back and forth on his homescreen, opening a folder of apps and then closing it, just so he had something else to focus on than the words he was saying. “He got mad. Called me a—a, a… you know.”

“Oh my god,” Logan murmured in a hushed, horrified tone, and this time he did put his hand on Virgil’s shoulder, squeezing gently. “I’m so sorry, Virgil.”

Virgil let out a little hiccup of a laugh that held no humor but was a way to avoid bursting into tears. He drew the back of his hand across his eyes. “I blocked his number right before you got here,” he mumbled.

Logan nodded. “Good.”

“But he’s been messaging me on Instagram this whole time,” Virgil added with a grimace. “I haven’t been opening them, but…” Right on cue, a notification banner popped up across the top of his screen, previewing a message that contained more of the same stuff he’d been seeing flash across his screen for the last half hour.

“Block him there too,” Logan said instantly. “He doesn’t deserve your time.”

Virgil brushed at the corners of his eyes, swiping away the tears that were threatening to accumulate. “I—I don’t want to open it,” he admitted, voice cracking. “If I open the app, I know I’m going to read all of the messages, and I don’t want to.”

Logan was already shaking his head. “No, don’t read them, oh my god—please don’t read them, please don’t hurt yourself like that.”

“I don’t want to,” Virgil repeated, burying his face in the bedcovers for just a second to hide the tears he couldn’t quite hold back.

Logan’s hand cautiously crept from his shoulder to his back, where it began rubbing soothing circles between his shoulderblades. “Is there any way I can help?” he asked after a moment, his voice almost calm enough to hide his own distress. “I could block him for you, if you want. That way you wouldn’t have to handle the app at all.”

Virgil considered this. He didn’t like the idea of others going through his phone, ever, full stop. But he really didn’t like the idea of opening the Instagram app himself and seeing the little red notification in the corner and inevitably clicking it against all his common sense and scrolling through the messages, reading them over and over again, and maybe trying to reason with the guy about Virgil’s own humanity, even though all that would do was invite a dozen more paragraphs of hurt to read and internalize and argue about, and it would only turn into a vicious cycle of never-ending emotional damage. Not ideal.

And he trusted Logan. He still didn’t like the idea of handing Logan his unlocked phone, but it was a lot less bad than the idea of pretty much anyone else having that access, and it was probably way less bad than trying to do it himself and just hoping he’d somehow have the willpower to leave well enough alone when he knew he didn’t trust himself to do that.

“Can I watch you do it?” he asked, turning his head to the side so he could make suddenly-tired eye contact.

“Of course,” Logan said gently. “Whatever makes you feel most comfortable.”

Virgil worried at his bottom lip with his teeth for a moment, then unlocked the phone with a quick hard press of his thumb and passed it to Logan, wincing slightly.

“Instagram?” Logan asked, finger hovering over the app and waiting for Virgil’s confirmation.

“Yeah,” Virgil said.

Logan opened the app and, waiting at each step for Virgil’s next instruction, blocked the guy without opening any of the messages sitting in Virgil’s DMs. “Does he have any other accounts?”

“I don’t think so,” Virgil mumbled.

“I’m glad. Are there any other methods he has of contacting you that you’d like to block him on?” Logan offered the phone back.

Virgil accepted it gratefully, his shoulders untensing a little. “I guess Snapchat.” He looked up the account and blocked it. “I deleted my Facebook ages ago.” He drummed his fingers on his lips, thinking. “I don’t have a ton of social media, I think that’s everything.”

Logan nodded, visibly relaxing. “Do you need anything? Any kind of support, or anything?”

“I dunno,” Virgil mumbled. He rolled over onto his back. “It just… it sucks.”

“It really does,” Logan agreed.

Virgil forced out a dry chuckle. “Guess I didn’t need that many friends, anyway,” he said, trying hard to make the situation into something amusing. It didn’t particularly work. “It’s not like most people like me, what’s one less?”

“I like you!” Logan protested, his voice much louder than it had been for the last ten minutes. He froze, looking anywhere but Virgil’s face. “I, I like you a lot. You’re a very good friend,” he added, fidgeting with the cuff of his sleeve, his expression flustered.

Virgil set that aside to overthink for ages later. “Uh. Thanks. You—you too,” he managed.

They were both very quiet for a moment, Logan’s fidgeting only increasing as Virgil chewed anxiously on the inside of his cheek.

“Is there anything you need right now?” Logan asked again, just as the tension between them began to become uncomfortable.

Virgil let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “I don’t know… are you busy?”

“Not until my next class, which is at noon tomorrow,” Logan assured him.

“I don’t want to be a bother—”

“I enjoy spending time with you, and you are clearly distressed and I’d like to help if I can,” Logan interrupted, “and you are my friend and I care about you very much, and it is not bothering me to ask whatever you want. If I want to say no, I will.”

Well. He had covered all his bases when it came to anticipating Virgil’s hesitations.

“Would you mind staying for a bit?” Virgil blurted. “To help me keep my mind off it? I—I don’t want to be alone. I think too much.”

Logan’s expression softened into something so tender it almost hurt to look at. “Of course,” he agreed easily. “As long as you like.”

“Thank you,” Virgil whispered.

“Anytime.” Logan fidgeted with his sleeve a bit more, not looking at Virgil. “Um. Would you like to cuddle?” he asked hesitantly after a minute.

Virgil wasn’t sure he’d heard that right. “What?”

“There are several physiological and neurological benefits to—” Logan began, determinedly not looking at Virgil’s face.

“No, I believe you,” Virgil interrupted, and in a surge of daring, added: “Sure.”

Logan blinked, his lips parting slightly in surprise. “Oh! Alright.” He shifted closer, carefully closing the gap between them like he was afraid of doing it wrong, and arranged himself against Virgil’s side with his head on Virgil’s shoulder and his arm draped across Virgil’s chest.

Virgil’s own arm curled around Logan easily, like it was meant to go there. Virgil ignored (mostly) his rapid heartbeat and how soft Logan’s hair was where it brushed against his cheek.

“Do you want to know something totally stupid?” Logan asked.

“Sure,” Virgil said, wondering where this was going.

“I’m scared of the space under my bed.” Logan half chuckled.

Virgil blinked. That had been kind of out of the blue. “What?”

“I’ve tried to rationalize it away. I know it doesn’t make sense.” Logan sounded half amused, like maybe he was trying to cover up some mild embarrassment with humor. “But ever since I was a little kid, it’s scared me. It was worse when I was little, I would have nightmares about it and everything. But it still makes me kind of nervous to just have empty space there. I like to fill it up.”

“That’s fair,” Virgil said. He understood irrational fears. “How come you’re telling me, though? Like, not in a judgemental way,” he added quickly, feeling Logan’s shoulders tense just slightly. “Just wondering where that came from.”

“Ah.” Logan relaxed again. “I am attempting vulnerability. You just shared what seemed like a pretty personal moment with me, and I know that can feel uncomfortable. I am trying to level the playing field a little.”

Virgil couldn’t help but smile. “That’s really sweet, Lo,” he said.

“I am just trying to be a good friend.” Logan shrugged one shoulder, but Virgil could hear the happy note in his voice.

“I was scared of going places by myself when I was little,” Virgil said. “Actually, that came from a nightmare, too.” He laughed a little.

“No, hey!” Logan protested. “Now it’s uneven again!”

“I don’t think that’s how vulnerability works,” Virgil told him, only teasing a little bit. “Friendship isn’t math, it doesn’t have to match on both sides. Besides, I got over that one, mostly. It’s all good.”

Logan nodded slowly in acceptance, rubbing his thumb back and forth across Virgil’s shoulder. “Alright.” He half sat up, but only took his glasses off and reached to put them on the sidetable, then lay back down, cuddling up even more cozily against Virgil once again, making a small noise of content.

“What have you been up to lately?” Virgil asked, his voice hardly above a whisper, because he needed there to be some kind of conversation. Not just to distract himself from the unpleasant stuff of earlier, although that was still a part of it, but also so that he could avoid examining the current situation too hard. Because Logan was just a friend, just a friend, and Virgil couldn’t afford to risk ruining a friendship as wonderful as this one with a big gay crush on his friend.

“Getting used to my new board position in the astronomy club,” Logan said. “And a lot of reading for my classes.”

“You’re the Vice President this year, right?” Virgil asked. Almost without thinking about it, he raised his hand to stroke Logan’s hair, which was just as soft against his fingertips as it had felt against his cheek.

Logan let out a soft sigh of content at the touch, nestling his head a little more snugly against Virgil’s shoulder, and coincidentally fucking melting Virgil’s heart into a puddle of goo. This whole not-a-crush thing was getting to be a serious problem.

“Yes, I’m the Vice President,” Logan confirmed. “I was the secretary last year, so I kind of know the ropes, but I have very different responsibilities this time. So that’s been interesting.”

“Tell me about it,” Virgil invited.

Logan did tell him about it, and then he asked Virgil what he’d been up to, and Virgil got to talk about a research project he was helping one of his favorite professors out with, and that led to telling each other stories about their favorite professors and classes (and some of the bad ones, too), and that led to stories about their friends, and Logan was looking up at Virgil with a soft gaze that Virgil could have stared into forever, and he really didn’t know what was up with Logan of all people’s sudden desire to cuddle, but he wasn’t asking questions because this was kind of the best thing that had happened in forever.

When, much later, the conversation slowly died down and Logan’s voice trailed off into a sleepy noise that he stifled against Virgil’s shoulder, scrunching his whole face up into a yawn, Virgil only tugged at the piled-up blanket he was leaning against until it half-covered the pair of them. Maybe the more responsible thing to do would have been to rouse Logan so he could go home to his apartment, but when Logan shifted closer to him and held him a little tighter, his eyes drifting shut, Virgil couldn’t find it in himself to regret it.

And he’d meant for it to only be a brief nap, really he had. He hadn’t planned to drift off himself as well. He could’ve sworn he only closed his eyes for a second or two—but when he opened them, sunlight was streaming through the window, and Logan was still there, still in Virgil’s arms cuddled close against his chest. Logan was wide awake now, but he seemed perfectly content to just lie there and examine Virgil’s face, a funny look in his eyes and a tiny smile on his lips.

“Hi,” Virgil said blearily, blinking at him. Then he processed where they were and what had happened. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I should have woken you up,” he began, half sitting up, his voice coming out a sleepy mumble that probably wasn’t anywhere near intelligible.

“No, it’s fine,” Logan assured him, gently pushing him back down. “I don’t mind.”

Virgil was half of a mind to keep apologizing, but it was very warm and he was still barely awake and Logan was so soft and nice, so all in all it was much easier to just lie there and accept the cuddles.

“Are you doing better?” Logan asked quietly.

It took Virgil a minute to fully remember the events of yesterday and figure out what he was referencing. “Oh. Uh, I guess. Like, it still sucks, but I’m going to be okay, you know? And this is nice, anyway.”

Logan nodded, resting his head on Virgil’s chest as if to listen to his heartbeat. “Yes. This is very nice.”

[4 years later]

part 2 - dreams  “Come to bed,” Logan said. “You have been scrolling through Tumblr for the past twenty-seven minutes, you can do that just as well while snuggling me.”  

“I’ve been attacked,” Virgil said lightly, shutting off his laptop and turning around to face his boyfriend. Logan was sitting in bed in his pajamas, leaning back against the headboard of their bed, a book in his hands and the covers pulled up over his lap. Virgil smiled. “Let me go brush my teeth and then I’ll come cuddle you, babe.”

“Acceptable,” Logan agreed with an answering smile, his eyes flicking up briefly from the pages to meet Virgil’s own.

Virgil brushed his teeth in the little bathroom of the apartment Logan had shared with the twins in the two years since they’d all graduated college. Before reemerging, Virgil changed into the old t-shirt and flannel pajama pants he’d brought with him—he usually stayed overnight on the weekends these days, and this one was no exception.

Roman, sitting at the kitchen table poring over a wad of papers that were probably a script from the local community theatre’s latest production, waved at Virgil as he exited the bathroom. “G’night, Virge,” he called.

“Night, Ro,” Virgil responded, and for good measure, he added, “night, Remus.”

Remus, somewhere out of sight, cackled. “Have fun getting—”

“Shut the fuck up,” Virgil interrupted automatically, without any real bite, making his way back into Logan’s room and shutting the door behind himself.

Logan smiled at the sight of him, pulling back the covers invitingly. Virgil snagged his phone off of Logan’s desk on his way over, climbing into the bed and curling up with his head in Logan’s lap.

Logan let out a small, pleased sigh, resting his hand on Virgil’s shoulder.

“Happy?” Virgil asked, reaching up to touch Logan’s face.

Logan nodded. “Very.”

Virgil chuckled and half sat up so he could reach to kiss Logan, then settled himself back where he’d been and unlocked his phone, scrolling through Tumblr without paying too much attention. Logan’s hand came to rest lightly on the back of his head, and after a moment began stroking his hair.

He turned a page, then after a minute closed the book and set it down.

Virgil looked up. His boyfriend was gazing down at him, face scrunched up just slightly the way it always did when he was thinking hard about something.

“You good?” Virgil asked.

Logan started slightly. “Oh! Yes.” His hand, which had drifted to a stop at the base of Virgil’s skull, resumed gently stroking Virgil’s hair.

“Whatcha thinking about?” Virgil asked.

Logan was quiet for a beat, then met Virgil’s eyes. “Would you like to get married?”

Virgil choked on air. “What?”

“Married,” Logan repeated, a little shy this time. “You and I. Would you be interested in doing that?”

“I—” Virgil found himself at a loss for words. “I don’t know? Maybe?” He sat up, shutting off his phone and setting it on the sidetable. “I’m sorry—are you proposing to me in our pajamas?”

“No,” Logan said emphatically, frowning. “This is not a proposal. This is so we can talk about it ahead of time, so that if you do want it, then you won’t need to be anxious when I do propose.”

Virgil blinked, processing that. “Wow.” He reached over and brushed his thumb lightly across Logan’s cheek. “I love you so much, you know that?”

Logan’s brow smoothed out and his shoulders visibly untensed. “I love you too.” He put his hand over Virgil’s where it rested on his cheek, cradling it tenderly. He closed his eyes. “And you don’t need to have an answer right now. We can have this conversation whenever you like. I just… wanted to bring it up. Because I would like that, if you are also amicable.” He turned his head slightly and pressed a kiss to the palm of Virgil’s hand.

Virgil hooked a finger in the collar of Logan’s pajama shirt and drew him close for a soft kiss. “Come lay down and cuddle me properly, nerd.”

Logan obediently set his book down on the sidetable beside Virgil’s phone, pulled off his glasses, and set those down too. With some shuffling of limbs, the two of them lay down, Virgil curled up in Logan’s arms. To anyone else, Logan would have seemed perfectly relaxed, content to lay there and press the occasional kiss to Virgil’s forehead; but Virgil could sense the slight tension in Logan’s face. He was nervous, even if he was trying hard not to show it.

Virgil’s own thoughts were whirling. Did he want to get married? He’d be lying if he said he hadn’t thought about it. But they were both still so young. Marriage was so big. Even if they’d been dating for more than four years at this point, that was barely more than a blip in the really long run. And what if they found out too late that they disagreed on something important? What if Logan wanted to take out a huge mortgage, or move across the country, or have kids? (Okay, they’d talked about kids, and both felt super hesitant, not-yet-ready at best, about the whole idea. But what if Logan changed his mind?)

(But also… waking up to Logan’s face every morning. Waking up to coffee with Logan and sleepy yawns. Casual touches on the elbow or shoulder or wrist or waist or cheek throughout the day, little reminders of love that were almost thoughtless in their routine. A home that would be just theirs. They could get a pet, if they wanted. They could paint stars on the ceiling or walls. They could cook dinner together every night. They could stay up late watching old TV shows and making snarky commentary back and forth. They could be each other’s home.)

Logan was watching Virgil’s face intently, even as he did his best to play it cool. Virgil met his eyes. “So,” he began, struggling to find the right words for what he wanted to convey. “I—I don’t know what I want. Or. I guess I kind of do. But I’m nervous.”

“We don’t have to,” Logan said quickly. “I mean. Obviously. But I don’t want you to—to feel pressured, or anything, to say anything one way or the other or to have to even say anything at all or—”

“Hey,” Virgil interrupted soothingly as Logan’s voice sped into anxious overdrive. “Hey, it’s okay.”

Logan sucked in a breath. He nodded. “I—sorry.”

Virgil shook his head and leaned across the few inches between them to kiss Logan. “Babe, I just told you I’m nervous. It’s fine if you are too.”

“I’m not nervous—” Logan began. He cut himself off at the wry look Virgil gave him. “I—okay, fine. But it’s not a big deal.”

“Hmm, disagree.”

“But the whole point was so I could support you if you felt—”

“L. Babe. Light of my life. You get nervous when you’re vulnerable. I get it.”

Logan bit his lip and reached for Virgil’s hand. He held it tightly.

Virgil squeezed back and snuggled closer under the covers. “Anyway, uh.” He paused for a second to make sure he knew how he wanted to say it. “I—I still don’t know exactly what I want to say about that idea. But I know the answer is definitely not a no.”

Logan breathed in, not quite sharply enough to be a gasp. “Oh,” he breathed, letting go of Virgil’s hand so he could caress his face.

“Does that make sense?” Virgil asked. “Like, I don’t yet know how or when I want it. But I—I think I want to, eventually, and I really want it to be you.”

“Yeah,” Logan said, his voice coming out a little choked. “Yeah, that—that’s good.”

Virgil half smiled. “Kiss?” he asked.

Logan was reaching for him before he even finished the word, pulling him close and clinging to him as he kissed the breath from Virgil’s lungs like he never wanted to let go. Virgil wrapped his own arm around Logan, holding him just as tightly, and cupped Logan’s face with the hand that was trapped between the two of them.

“I love you,” Virgil whispered as they pulled apart, and now he was choking up a little too.

Logan pressed their foreheads together. “I love you so much.”

They were both quiet for a moment, holding each other close.

“I think it’d be nice to get one of those really fancy coffee machines,” Virgil whispered after a minute. “Someday. For our someday kitchen.” He enjoyed Logan’s sudden intake of breath and the way his eyes widened slightly at the word our. “The kind that can make espresso, and shit,” Virgil went on. “We could try out all different kinds of things. And I wouldn’t tell anybody how much sugar you always put in your coffee.”

“I put a normal amount of sugar in my coffee,” Logan protested, a smile quirking onto his face.

“L, I love you, but that is maybe the least true thing you have ever said in your life.” Virgil snickered.

“Shut up,” Logan whined, pushing lightly at Virgil’s shoulder with an answering grin.

Virgil leaned in and kissed his cheek. “It’s cute.” He hesitated for a beat. “What would you want? In your dream future?”

“You,” Logan responded immediately.

Virgil pressed a hand to his mouth. He absolutely should have seen that one coming, but he hadn’t, and the surprise made the pang of fondness in his chest all the sweeter. “Logan,” he managed after a minute.

Logan only grinned, looking very pleased with himself. “A coffee machine does sound very nice, too, though,” he added. “And space for you to keep an instrument.”

“Oh,” Virgil breathed, lighting up at the idea. “Yeah, that sounds really good. I’d want a library for all your stupid nerdy books.”

Logan put a hand on Virgil’s cheek. “I’d want a kitchen table that we both picked out together.”

Virgil grinned. “A couch to hold you on.”

“A wall full of art that we both like.”

“Windows so there’s light everywhere and you can see the stars at night.”

“A pantry full of our favorite foods.”

“A bed to—”

“Virgil!”

“Whaaat?”

“We were being cute!” Logan smacked his arm lightly. “Remus is a bad influence on you,” he accused, though Virgil could see he was trying not to laugh.

“I mean, probably,” Virgil allowed, grinning. “But maybe I was just going to say a bed to sleep in. And cuddle in. And perfectly innocent things like that. Maybe you’re the one Remus is a bad influence on.”

“I—” Logan struggled for a second, then broke down into snickers.

Virgil grinned, wrapping his arms around Logan’s waist and enjoying the sound of his laughter.

“Were you going to say something like that, though?” Logan asked, composing himself.

“Oh, no, absolutely not.” Virgil snickered. “You were right, I was going to ruin the cutesy vibe we had going on there, one hundred percent. But you’re really cute when you laugh, so no regrets.”

“Hmm,” Logan hummed, leaning closer. “You know when else I’m really cute?”

“When?” Virgil breathed.

“When I’m kissing you,” Logan murmured, and closed the gap between their lips.

Virgil kissed back, eyes fluttering shut and hands sliding a little more securely around Logan’s waist. In his opinion, Logan made a very compelling point.

[achliegh]

Golden

Yeehaw Leo… it's all because this song came on one day (I don’t even really listen to country anymore so it really is fate). Leo is based off that song, each chapter is going to be based off a yeehaw song too.

Characters belong to @lumosinlove

Beta: @the-most-slytherin-hufflepuff & @punkkkkboi

TW/CW: Smut, terrible yeehaw sayings and jokes, injuries, mentions of past death/suicide, minor character death, underage drinking, mentions of past arrests, cringe

Chapter Songs (listening in order is recommended):

Chapter 17:

The plane landed, Finn was the first to turn his phone off airplane mode and suddenly it was blowing up, twitter, Instagram, snapchat, tiktok, even Facebook for chrissakes. He was getting messages from family, friends and even the team. He put his phone on silent when he started getting annoyed glances from other passengers.

Logan was next, not as many notifications but still a lot. Leo had a few but none of them had to do with Finn and Logan. Finn was scrolling furiously through his notifications, getting more and more nervous as he kept scrolling. Then he saw the first twitter notification.

Hacked.

His eyes widened and his heart was pounding, Logan was the person in the middle this time, he grips Logan’s arm tight. Logan looks over to him a bit groggy and confused. Finn is in complete panic. Logan raises an eyebrow asking what's wrong. Finn just shakes his head and shoves his phone in his pocket.

They get off the plane and everything is normal, getting their bags and walking towards the closest exit Finn stops walking, causing Noelle to run into the back of him. They all look outside and notice all the media waiting.

What was going on…

“Noelle, Leo can you guys go out a different door and take a taxi to meet us at the apartment? Call Sirius while you’re on the way.”

“Finn what's going on?” Leo is staring outside for a moment before he meets Finn’s eyes.

“Please just do what I ask, I’ll explain more if you don’t hear anything on the way.” Leo and Noelle share a look and then nod, walking towards the exit that is two doors away, Noelle calling a taxi while Leo calls Sirius.

“Finn?” Logan takes his hand, running his thumb over the freckled man’s knuckles. He is looking at the media and they seem to have noticed them, taking pictures through the glass. The flashes put a spot in his eyes when he blinks. Finn has his jaw set in a way that Logan rarely sees, he is angry. Something isn’t right.

“Keep a hand on me, you know how terrible the press can be.” Finn grips his hand tighter as they walk towards the doors with all the press, hoping Noelle and Leo got out safe. The door opens and the mingled words of shouting reporters who Finn knows are just trying to do their job but it's an annoying job.

“LOGAN! Does Finn know you’ve been cheating on him” A female reporter yelled out from the middle of the pack. Logan snaps his head around and is about to answer before Finn drags him forward.

“Finn, do you know the man in the video!?” A male reporter shouted at them and kept asking more and more questions until Finn couldn’t take it anymore he turned around. The shouting, the flashes, the microphones in his face, it was all too much. He was overwhelmed and shutting down.

“Fuck off!” Before turning back around and walking into the first floor of the parking garage, some of the reporters with just pad and pens followed them through the barriers. He ignores them as he unlocks the vehicle. Logan and Finn toss their bags in before they get in themselves.

“Let me see your phone.” Logan is so thankful for the tinted window in this car. Finn hands him his phone and it already has Logan’s face ID so he unlocks the phone and starts looking through everything on Finn’s twitter that was posted. There was everything from Finn’s own nudes to Logan’s. He felt sick to his stomach as he scrolled, then he saw it.

“They posted the video… The video of me and Leo in the mirror. I didn’t know you saved that on your phone, I thought it was just snapchat.”

“They hacked everything of mine, Lo, Baby… I’m so sorry.” Logan hears the crack in Finn’s voice and just places his hand over Finn’s on the console between them. It was a silent drive home.

When Noelle and Leo reached the apartment the press was outside, luckily they couldn't get into the parking garage or the actual building. They make their way inside and see most of the team already waiting by the door.

“What’s going on?” Leo asks Sirius as he unlocks the door and lets everyone in. James turns on the news but nothing is on but the weather right now, Lily and Celeste are there and go to the kitchen with food they already made. Leo was getting more and more confused.

“Finn was hacked, every account of his on social media has posted pictures of him and Logan but there is one video and we know it’s you.” Sirius watches as Leo’s face pales immediately. “No one else knows though, they are trying to call Logan a cheater and Finn a cuck but no one can figure out who you are.”

“What’s the video?” Leo closes the door behind everyone and moves him and Noelle's bags to line the wall so people don’t trip, he’d move them into his room later.

“A video of you and Logan in a mirror, it’s dark and you don’t show either of your faces but people are going wild for it. It was released on twitter first… then everywhere else.” Leo nods and politely excuses himself to the kitchen to help with whatever because that is his safe space.

A half hour later Logan and Finn stumble in the apartment. Finn says nothing as he walks over to Sirius and just starts apologizing for how he has ruined the team's reputation, while Logan takes a slow seat next to Dumo who doesn’t hesitate to pull him into a supportive hug.

“It’s going to be okay.” Dumo mumbles into Logan’s hair rubbing his hand up and down his back as Logan sniffles. “This could have happened to any of us. Hell, it already happened to Remus and Sirius.”

“Not in the same way.” Logan’s voice is muffled in Dumo’s chest and the older man just holds him tighter. “Maman and Papa are going to kill me…” Logan hands his phone to Dumo and it's already unlocked, messages from his parents are on screen. He takes Logan’s phone and holds it up to where he can see it better. Messages just saying horrible things about Logan and Leo for some reason.

“Logan-”

“Shush! Laisse-moi tranquille!” Dumo sighs and closes Logan’s phone, putting it far away from them on the coffee table as he just holds his son.

“Finn, you did nothing wrong! Stop apologizing!” Sirius pulls Finn into a tight hug and Finn tries to pull out of it but Sirius is much stronger. Holding him there while angry tears threaten to fall from Finn’s eyes. Once he melts into Sirius’ hold he starts talking.

“I just ruined my boys' lives…”

“Finn, this wasn’t you.” Finn doesn’t answer, he just slowly pulls away from Sirius when he hears his phone ringing. It’s Alex, he is supposed to go to his wedding this weekend and Finn is thinking he is going to uninvite him.

“I should take this on the balcony.” Sirius gives him a firm pat on the shoulder, resting his hand for a second to give it a squeeze before Finn brushes him off and walks outside. “Alex.” Finn immediately starts crying at the voice of his brother. “Alex- I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to ruin your wedding.”

“What? Finn, I’m calling to make sure you are okay, this has nothing to do with my wedding.” Finn cries even harder, having to support himself on the railing as his tears drip over the edge. “Finn please talk to me.”

“I don’t know what to say, I ruined their lives, Alex! I ruined the people who I love most. How could I do that?” He squats down keeping one hand on the railing and pressing his forehead to the cold metal of the wall of the balcony.

“Finn, Bud, I know you love to blame everything on yourself but I promise you this is not your fault.” Finn lets out a pained noise as his brother speaks.

“Alex, I was the one who saved the pictures! It’s internet 101!” He takes a deep breath as he starts to become exhausted from crying, no more tears were coming but he felt as though his breathing wouldn’t slow down.

“What? You think I don’t have pictures of my fiancé on my phone?” Finn laughs a tiny bit as his breathing starts to go back to normal. “Finn, you need to take down all your accounts before this gets on the news.”

“I tried, I got locked out of them on the way home when Logan started deleting them as I drove us home.”

“Then I guess you need to get in contact with Twitter and whatever else… Then you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and make up a plan to play the media.” Finn is silent for a moment, thinking about how they have a game this Friday, the day he also leaves for Florida in the middle of the night.

“Play the media… That's probably the smartest thing you’ve ever said.”

“Hey!”

“Love you Alex but I need to talk to Sirius and Remus.” He hangs up the phone and rounds up Logan, Remus and Sirius. Pushing them into Leo’s room. “Okay so… how do we fuck with the media?”

Leo was oddly quiet, Reg noticed and placed a hand on his arm. Smiling a little bit at each other Reg could see just how scared Leo is. He is in his head and it's worrying him. Leo isn’t exactly the best at taking care of his mental health and his stress baking foods he doesn’t even like is definitely a sign.

“Leo, why don’t we go have a smoke?” Leo just shakes his head, Clay is sick right now and Thomas didn’t let him come here because he has been ill since they got back home. “Leo, can we at least sit down?”

“These need to be finished Reg. If you want to go sit then sit.” Reg sighs and decides not to pester him anymore. Going over to sit on the couch. He is brought away from texting Clay to the news loudly playing over the TV.

Leo and everyone else in the kitchen move to behind the couch to look at the screen. He was hoping it wasn’t going to be anything about them and what was posted. He was praying to any God he could think of that it wasn’t them.

His prayers never seem to work.

“Breaking News! Finn O’Hara, winger for the infamous Gryffindor Lions hockey team, has recently had some pictures and a video of him, his boyfriend… and a secret man leak onto the internet. We had reporters at the airport earlier today to see if we could get any statements from the two love birds as they made their way back home. We were trying to get answers but O’Hara and Tremblay seemed to be avoiding answering anything. Here is the footage we got from earlier”

Footage from Finn and Logan walking out of the airport shows up on the screen. Finn looking like thunder, Logan just looking confused. Leo watches Logan snap his head towards the reporter who yelled something at him, he didn’t know what was said because his ears felt like they were full of cotton. Finn leads them further on into the crowd but Finn suddenly turns around and spits a ‘Fuck off’ their way before ducking into the parking garage.

“Tremblay seems to be confused as to what was going on while O’Hara was getting defensive. The question everyone is asking is, who is this mystery man? And will this seemingly perfect relationship fall apart because of him? We have the video that was leaked here and we can only show the top half as the bottom is quite scandalous.”

Then suddenly Leo is on TV, they stick to their word only showing the top half of the video, it was darker than Leo remembers it being. He watches as Logan’s mouth moves but there is no audio… just a caption.

Finn.

The week flies by, Leo is the only person allowed to leave the apartment besides for practice, they had a game tonight against Ravenclaw. They won 2-0. Finn and Logan, of course, were being interviewed. Sat together in their stalls, sweaty and still in all their gear, they were very touchy on camera. Logan had kissed Finn’s cheek a couple of times, Finn’s arm was over Logan and he was watching Logan like he was the most important thing in the room.

“So, everyone wants to know. Who is the man in the video?” A reporter turns her microphone towards Finn who just shrugs and smiles.

“Like you said, he's the man in the video.” This shocks everyone for a minute because the camera flashes again.

“Did you like seeing another man with Logan?”

“I wouldn’t have kept it if I didn’t like it.” Finn flashes his most charming smile.

“Logan, is this a random man or someone you know.”

“I know every inch of them.” He smiles as Finn snickers.

“Are you two in an open relationship?”

“Nope!” They both answer at the same time before sharing a chaste kiss. Logan playfully pushes Finn’s cheek away from him and they start laughing again.

“Are you swingers?” They both start laughing and shaking their heads for the millionth time in this interview.

“Non, our relationship is closed and we aren’t swingers. Sorry you just aren’t our type.” The whole locker room gets a chuckle out of that and Marlene kicks the media out of the room so everyone can change. Logan and Finn get changed and finally feel like an entire house has been lifted off their shoulders. Finn was leaving tonight and Leo was meeting Logan at the Dumias house to watch the kids for the weekend.

It was going well. Hours later after Finn kissed his boys goodbye, Logan at the parking lot at the stadium, and Leo at the apartment after grabbing his bags. Maybe they were more than just a chaste kiss on the lips but it was great.

Leo was on his way over to Logan’s with a little surprise next to him. He waltzed up to the door with a small carrier in his arms. Adele answers the door and smiles at him.

“They already have articles about Logan and Finn posted and they are amazing just wait until you hear- what are you holding?” Leo laughs at her as she lets him in. Not giving anything away he walks into the living room, Adele hot on his heels. He sees Logan on his stomach with Marc sitting on his back playing with a hot wheel car on his shoulder blades. Katie is sitting by his head as he rests his head on his hands as she rambles on about something that Leo didn’t catch.

“Leo’s here! And he has a gift.” Adele announces, all the other kiddo’s get up and scramble over to Leo. Hugging him around his legs. Logan slowly stands, starting to get sore from the game that night, stretching his arms above his head before he spins around to see Leo holding a cardboard carrier that you usually get from pet stores.

“What did you bring me, a pet? I’m not that lonely.” Leo smiles and wraps his arm around Logan after the kids let go of him. The little box started squeaking very quietly, catching the attention of everyone. Leo sees the excited stares he's getting from all the kids and his boyfriend so he decides to open the box.

“Meet Tortilla, I adopted her from a family owned pet store that had a litter recently. She has been handlers since she was a tiny version of herself so she is okay around kids.” He lifts a small chinchilla out of the box. She is small and soft chattering to herself as she takes in her surroundings.

Logan’s face immediately morphs into one of pure amazement and adoration. He slowly reaches towards her. “How did you know?”

“Ma found your middle school Pinterest when she was figuring out what gift to get for the holidays. She bought the cages and food for here and Finn’s place.” He smiles as Logan cuddles her gently to his chest. She seems to have taken to him Immediately, burrowing into his arms.

“I love her, I- Leo I don’t know how to respond.”

“You don’t have too. She is part of the family now, Finn has already met her. She doesn’t like him much.” They both smile at that and the kids are now around Logan looking at Tortilla who is thriving under all the attention. “I’m going to start dinner.” With that Leo takes himself into the kitchen to start cooking. He could hear Logan teaching the kids how to hold her properly and how to play with her safely as Leo cooked. He was cooking up leftovers that Celeste left.

Once they ate Leo went out to the truck to get the cage out to put it in Logan’s room. Setting up her enclosure Adele held Tortilla and Katie and Marc stood around her giving Tortilla little pets every chance they got. They placed her in the enclosure after it was ready for her and let her run around inside for a bit before she went into her little home. Logan corralled everyone to the downstairs living room where they watched a couple of movies together.

Soon enough Katie and Marc had fallen asleep on either side of Leo. Katie was basically in his lap and Marc was trying to squish himself behind Leo’s back. Leo got up once the movie ended and picked up one limp child in each arm. Logan decided to go take Adele to bed while Leo tucked the other two in. Asking if they wanted to share a bed and they said yes. So they stayed in Katie’s room both snuggling together as Leo kisses their foreheads goodnight, flicks on the nightlight that makes shapes on the ceiling and leaves the door open a crack so they don’t feel trapped if they wake up.

They met down on the couch again and sat together, Leo’s arm over the back of the couch with Logan resting his head on his shoulder, both tired but not ready for bed.

“We should call Finn, make sure he is in his hotel room safe.” Leo yawns as he is talking while Logan pulls out his phone and starts a FaceTime call with Finn. He doesn’t answer the first time so they try again, him answering on the first ring.

“You guys interrupted my shower concert! I was jamming out.” Finn is only in a towel still dripping wet, he takes a smaller towel and starts drying his hair while looking at the mirror, his phone set up to lean against it on the counter. Leo and Logan share a look of appreciation at their boy.

“You should drop the towel ginger boy, show us what we are missing.” Leo speaks up smirking when he sees Finn turn red.

“You have kids awake!”

“Non, they are asleep.” Logan adds in as they watch Finn pick up the phone and start walking towards the bed, tossing them so they only see the ceiling. They start booing and Finn laughs as he picks the phone back up now in a pair of Leo’s boxers with fish on them. They have become his favorites.

“I was changing, chill out.” He still has the towel from his hair around his shoulders, he just looks at them for a bit taking in how soft and sweet they look curled up together. “You guys are so fucking cute.” He shares a look with Logan and he knows what’s gonna happen. Leo starts talking about the day as Logan leans up to whisper something in his ear. Finn watched as Leo’s face changed from an innocent smile to a dark blush and a slightly shocked face.

“Bedroom?” Leo nods as Logan winks at the phone and drags the taller man to the bedroom, looking around for a second he grabs a chair and pulls it close to the bed while Leo turns on the light. Finn is excitedly watching his screen as Logan tackles Leo onto the bed.

“Tell me what’s the plannn!” Finn whines over the phone and Logan just looks at him from where he is between Leo’s legs and smirks before diving in for a spicy kiss. Logan shoved his tongue in Leo’s mouth taking control of the kids like he hasn’t ever before. Leo is pliant under him and yanks on his shirt as they make out.

Logan leans back and tugs his shirt over his head trying to toss it over the chair but instead throwing it directly at the phone.

“Hey!” Finn shouts from under the shirt, Leo laughs as Logan leans over to pluck the shirt off him. He blows a kiss at the camera before a shirt hits him in the head covering his eyes.

“Hey!” Leo and Finn both start laughing as Logan tosses the other shirt away from them and stands up on the bed pulling down his pants and shakily taking them off before he lands on his knees and yanks Leo’s sweats down.

“In a rush Lo?” Leo smiles as Logan starts furiously digging through his side table drawer for what Leo was guessing was lube. Tossing random papers and a small book on the floor in the process.

“Kinda, I’ve been wanting to fuck you for months!” Leo smiles as Logan finds the small bottle of lube and kneels between his legs. “This okay?”

“Only if We can start with me riding you.” Logan basically moans at the thought. And pours some lube on his fingers.

“Want to watch while I finger Leo? Finn?”

“Is that even a question that needs an answer?” Logan grabs the phone with his clean hand and turns the camera around so that Finn can watch. Leo has taken it upon himself to grab his own knees and pull them towards his chest, giving Logan more room. Finn and Logan both have the wind knocked out of them at the sight.

Logan slowly presses his finger into Leo and is a little surprised when Leo asks him to push it all the way in. Logan complies and Leo moans flushing dark on his chest and inner thighs. Logan starts to pull out and push in and as he does Leo keeps asking for more.

“Baby be Patient.”

“I’m not good at being patient.” Leo’s face is to the side and his eyes are closed S rushing his brow every once in a while when Logan grazes his prostate. He looks beautiful.

Logan eventually adds another finger and Leo starts rocking back on his hand.

“Look at you~” Finn says over the phone, he’s palming himself through his boxers, he doesn’t want to touch until they get to the main event no matter how bad he wants to.

Leo smiles a little, showing off his dimples. Logan doesn’t think he needs to be prepped much more but he is loving watching Leo rock back on his fingers.

“Lo, I’m ready.” Leo starts to sit up as Logan pulls his fingers out Leo kisses him and flips them over so Leo is straddling Logan. He grabs Logan’s phone from his hand and sets it up on top of the headboard that is secured into the wall instead of the bed. “Can you see?”

“Better than I have in my whole life.” Finn smiles looking red and relaxed. Leo watches as Logan lubes himself up. Wiping his hand on the blanket before he rests his hands on Leo’s thighs, tracing his thumb over Matilda’s face as he watches Leo sink down on him. Both gasping, Leo doesn't hesitate to start moving. Logan’s light grasp on Leo's thighs turns into a hard grip within a few seconds. Leo brings himself up and lets gravity take him back down punching sounds out of him as he goes.

“Leo! Leo! I want to change position!” Logan was begging Leo who had his head tipped back, one hand in his hair the other slowly stroking his cock. He looks down at Logan and nods letting the shorter man take over. Leo pulls off and is positioned on his hands and knees. Logan slips back in him and starts fucking him nice and slow until neither of them can take it anymore. He speeds up both of them moaning quieter than usual so they don’t wake up anyone in the house. Logan is getting close so he reaches around and starts jerking Leo off fast with no real rhythm, his own thrusts getting sloppy.

His orgasm sneaks up on him and he isn’t able to give Leo a warning as he cums into him, fucking Leo through his orgasm he plasters himself across Leo’s back kissing his sweaty shoulder blades as he continues to jerk Leo until he feels as warm wet feeling on his hand. Leo must have warmed him but his ears aren’t working. He pulls out of Leo and they both sit up in time to see Finn cumming so hard it hits his chest.

“That was amazing boys, I wish I was there in person.” They both sleepily nod and share a short kiss before taking the phone and heading to Logan ensuite bathroom which is small but gets the job done. They shower with Finn propped in the corner where the water doesn’t hit, just cleaning each other off and hugging under the spray.

They fall into bed and drift off to sleep with Finn who forgot to plug in his phone. It dies some time during the night, making him sleep in a bit longer than he meant too.

But he wasn’t bothered, because he spent the night with his boys.

His boys that he loves.

They really need to tell Leo they love him… when he gets home.

[let-this-ship-sink-already]

Tearing down the Tomdaya timeline, created by "Spidermaninlove" - Part 2 (2017)

I am not using evidence or "proof", which is OUT THERE, to show that this timeline is only based on the emotions/opinions of its creator and is therefore falsely claimed as a fact. I am using common sense to explain the dynamic between the two co-workers/friends that are Tom Holland and Zendaya.

***

January 28-31, 2017

Tom, Haz, and Jacob post photographs taken in Z’s apartment in NY.  Z snaps the boys playing cards in her apartment.  On 1/29 Tom visits Z on her Covergirl photo shoot.  -> Co-workers/friends hanging out.

When asked on 1/29 why he is in NY, Tom tells a fan he is visiting his girlfriend. -> I looked into this for a bit, because for Tomdaya stans, this is the one moment that gives it all away *dramatic sigh*. The original fan picture is no longer available, so I’m going to add a screenshot posted by Spidermaninlove.

When referring to the girlfriend Tom mentioned, the fan says “There are pictures of her online.“. How would the fan know THAT if Tom mentioned only having a girlfriend? Or did Tom tell him „You can find her online.“, which I doubt. And if the fan believed Zendaya‘s the girlfriend Tom referred to, why wouldn’t he say so? He surely knows Zendaya if he knows about Tom being Spiderman. It’s just a weird encounter and raises more questions than it answers. IF you can take the fans word for it that THAT is what Tom said to him.

They were also spotted by fans outside a theater on 1/29.  -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

On 1/31, Tom is photographed leaving Z’s apartment building with his luggage.

Tom tweets paparazzi photo of himself exiting Z’s apartment building. 

Tom posts a video of himself and Haz at the airport and their departure.  Haz tweets Z thanking her for putting them up and putting up with them over the weekend.  

Tom posts another paparazzi photo of himself leaving Z’s apartment as his profile photo on his Twitter account. 

Note:  Posting paparazzi photos on social media is what Z calls “damage control”. -> Again, no one knows what Zendaya considers damage control. To me it looks like Tom was trying to drop his location before paparazzi could - to give himself control. Also, no one takes their assistant/best friend to go see their girlfriend.  

February 12, 2017

Tom in London for the BAFTAs.  Z congratulates Tom on social media for his Rising Star BAFTA award. -> Co-workers/friends supporting one another. A little side note: At the BAFTA, Tom was seen with Ella Purnell. They were spending the evening together after the ceremony and ended up at a private party at Tom‘s hotel afterwards. Tomdaya shippers seem to ignore that fact.

March 3, 2017

Tom in LA filming a Dell commercial. ->IRRELEVANT INFO

March 4-5, 2017

Z snapped herself with Tom and company at the cinema watching the Spider-man Homecoming trailer, and also at the Cheesecake Factory.  A theater employee said Tom paid for Z’s movie snacks and that the two were playing around while she rang up their purchases. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

March 7, 2017

Tom in LA staying at the London Hotel. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

March 15, 2017

Haz tweeted the boys are back in town with a photo of Tom and Jacob.  Haz also posted a photo of Tom driving in the LA area. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out. IRRELEVANT INFO.

Z snapped, your sick girlfriend really loves you, and immediately deleted the snap. -> Now this is another huge moment for Tomdaya shippers *dramatic sigh*. My opinion: Tom, from what we know, never had a Snapchat, at least not a public one, so why would Zendaya accidentally post a Snapchat she meant to send her boyfriend Tom, who doesn’t even have Snapchat? Making it seem like the Snapchat was for Tom is an ASSUMPTION/INTERPRETATION.

March 19, 2017

Z and Tom spotted together in LA at a restaurant. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out.

March 28, 2017

Tom photographed with fan while he was visiting the set of KC Undercover. -> Co-worker/friends supporting one another.

March 29, 2017

Z liked Tom’s tweet:  Favourite question of the day.  “Is spider-man a sex symbol?  ABSOLUTELY HAHAHA -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

March 30,  2017

Tom with Z at Choreo Carnival -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

April 1, 2017

Tom and Z filmed promos.  Tom plays with Noon on Z’s snap. -> Co-workers/friends working together.

April 2, 2017

Tom and Z filmed Lip Sync Battle (LSB) (aired May 7, 2017).  Z appeared jealous when Chrissy said she wanted to live out her upside-down Spidey kiss fantasy, until John Legend appeared to fulfill Chrissy’s fantasy, and then Z was all smiles.  Z filmed LSB behind the scenes for her app which included lots of adorable interaction between Z and Tom.  -> Jealous Zendaya, all smiles Zendaya and adorable interaction are an INTERPRETATION. Co-workers promoting a movie together.

April 3, 2017

Haz tweeted leaving LA. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

April 22, 2017

Haz tweeted in LA -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

April 23, 2017

Spider-man interview in LA.  Both Tom and Z are interviewed. -> Co-workers working together.

April 25, 2017

Zendaya fan tweeted that she had seen Z several times that week at Tom’s hotel in LA. -> Co-workers/friends working/hanging out together IF truly happened.

May 5, 2017

During the press tour in Brazil, an interviewer asks Tom if he has found his Liz Allan.  Tom’s response was, “Have I found my own Liz Allan?  Uh yeah, I guess so, kind of, I may have, yeah, maybe, sort of.” -> Making this statement about Zendaya is an ASSUMPTION/INTERPRETATION.

May 7, 2017

Z and Tom attend the MTV Movie and TV Awards.  They debuted a new Spider-man trailer, sat together, and appeared to be in their own little world. -> Co-workers promoting a movie together. Appearing to be in their own world is an ASSUMPTION/INTERPRETATION.

May 9, 2017

Tom on the Ellen show. Tom and Z spotted at The Grove in LA where they watched Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2.  They were also seen eating at a restaurant together. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

May 14, 2017

Z takes private jet to Oakland for Mother’s Day.  Tom appears to be in a Snapchat video taken at Z’s grandmother’s house. -> "Appears to" is an ASSUMPTION.

May 28, 2017

Tom back in LA  and appears on Jimmy Kimmel.  -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

Note:  Tom attended a Knicks/Warriors game on January 31, 2016 – before it was announced Z landed a role in Spider-man Homecoming.  He also attended a Lakers game on March 17, 2017.  While on Jimmy Kimmel, it wasn’t the most recent basketball game that Tom attended, but the Warriors (Z’s favorite team) game that he talked about. -> IRRELEVANT INFO. Also, no one knows how many games in between he has attended. Making it about Zendaya is an ASSUMPTION.

May 29, 2017

Haz tweets photo of himself in the California hills.  It appears to be the area where Z likes to hike. -> IRRELEVANT INFO. Making it about Zendaya is an ASSUMPTION.

May 30, 2017

Tom in LA for Facebook Live and Yahoo Movies interviews. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

June 1, 2017

Tom doing Infinity War reshoots with RDJ in LA today.  Posts on IG it’s his birthday and thanks his fans.  He also posts about watching the Baby Driver screening.  Haz tweets a photo of this screening as well.  When asked by interviewers what he did for his birthday, Tom said he was in bed by 9:00 p.m.  -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

Z wishes Tom a happy birthday on IG and Twitter. -> Co-workers/friends supporting one another.

June 2, 2017

Haz tweets he has a free day in LA.  Where is Tom? -> IRRELEVANT INFO. Making it about Tom being with Zendaya is an ASSUMPTION.

Note:  Both Tom and Z were curiously silent on social media on Friday, June 2. -> Making it seem like they were silent due to being together and Haz having a day off is an ASSUMPTION/INTERPRETATION.

June 4, 2017

Z’s niece’s birthday.  There is some speculation as to whether or not Tom can be heard in Deja’s snaps during the party. -> Speculations are speculations.

June 5, 2017

Tom departs LA for Singapore.  Article published in which Z interviews Tom. -> IRRELEVANT INFO/CO-workers promoting a movie together.

June 10, 2017

Tom departs Singapore for Paris. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

June 12-13, 2017

Z and Tom in Paris for press tour.  They were holding hands during an interview. -> Co-workers promoting a movie together. *dramatic sigh* They were holding hands - something that was stated by a french reporter, who, of course, did not take a picture when he had a chance to out them as a couple. A reporter, who surely did not have the intention of creating some buzz around the interview or his work place. (Note the sarcasm.) This encounter is made up. Why would two people, who are believed to hide a relationship, hold hands in a public setting?

While in Paris, doing separate interviews, Z was lurking on a Tom Holland fan account on Instagram. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

Tom, Haz, Z, and Darnell attend a show together while in Paris. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

June 14, 2017

Z and Tom in Madrid.  Our favorite duo have a “Stealing hearts since…” Twitter war based on photos taken during the press tour in Madrid.  Tom and Z share some loving glances and tender moments while being photographed together in Madrid. -> Co-workers working/promoting a movie together. “Sharing loving glances and tender moments“ is an INTERPRETATION.

June 15, 2017

Tom Will Smith’s Z during the press tour in London.  Several tender moments and heart eyes are exchanged. -> Co-workers working/promoting a movie together. “Tender moments and heart eyes“ is an INTERPRETATION.

June 16, 2017

Tom and Z in a store in London looking at Spider-man merchandise.  Both attend private screening of Spider-man Homecoming in London for Tom’s friends and family. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together/promoting a movie together.

June 17-19, 2017

Tom and Z in Barcelona.  Z snaps Tom singing along with Mario and Z’s duet of Let Me Love You while Z and Tom are sitting in a hotel room together.  Tom catches Z snapping him, jumps down from his perch on the windowsill, and it appears he may have tackled her. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

Tom adopts Z’s YSL leather jacket.  Z snaps Tom wearing the jacket, and calls him a “theif”.  She also snaps Tom several times while singing and dancing in a vehicle they’re both traveling in. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

More tender moments and loving glances are shared during a press tour photo shoot.  -> INTERPRETATIONS.

June 20, 2017

Z in NY on Sway in the Morning.  During the interview, Z mentions she just got off the phone with Tom, and discusses her position on relationships.  “Some things don’t need the validation of the world… It’s up to you if you decide to go public and do things like that… but for me I’d rather just keep it to myself.  Also, people’s opinions and thoughts and stuff and when that gets into a relationship that just makes… you just need two people in a relationship, not millions, so, I’d rather just keep it to myself.” -> Making Zendaya‘s statement about Tom is an ASSUMPTION/INTERPRETATION.

June 24-25, 2017

Spider-man Homecoming cast press tour in NY including Tom and Z.  Several adorable interviews come out during this press tour.  Z and Tom exchange teasing remarks and adoring glances.  -> Co-workers/friends promoting a movie together. „Adorable interviews, adorable glances“ are INTERPRETATIONS.

June 28, 2017

Z and Tom attend the Los Angeles premiere of Spider-man Homecoming and the after party.  -> Wow, really? It‘s as if they are in said movie together and need to promote it? (Note the sarcasm.) Co-workers promoting a movie together.

June 30, 2017

It appears Z dropped off Tom and company at LAX. -> ASSUMPTION. If true, co-workers/friends supporting one another.

July 4, 2017

Z is in Paris and Tom is in LA.  Tom posts a photo of himself, Z, Haz, Jacob and Harry at the Escape Hotel in Los Angeles. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

July 6, 7, 8, 2017

On July 7, Tom, Z, and Haz watch Spider-man Homecoming at a theater in LA.  Z and Tom are photographed by fans wearing matching Spider-man hoodies, that Z bought at Target, at a theater on July 8 where they watched Spider-man Homecoming again. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

Tom goes hot spinning with Z’s mom, Claire, on July 7 at 6 a.m.  Z is there but did not participate.  Z snaps Tom as he’s coming out of the spin class and beams when she sees him.  Tom is spent, but is all smiles for Z. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together. Tom being “all smiles“ for Zendaya is an INTERPRETATION.

July 13, 2017

People.com reported Tom and Z are dating.

Z addresses on Twitter People’s claim that the two are dating but neither she nor Tom deny it. -> Tom and Zendaya are on Twitter a day after and decide to make fun of the article. Spidermaninlove makes the INTERPRETATION that, while they make fun of the article, they both don’t say „No, we are not dating“ and are in fact dating instead.

Tom’s uncle, Paul Holland, retweeted a Tomdaya dating announcement, and in doing so, confirmed their relationship. -> If truly happened, Tom‘s uncle retweeting that, would not be a CONFIRMATION. This piece of „evidence“ raises questions. How do you know Tom‘s uncle and his IG? How do you know whether Tom is close to his uncle? Maybe he thought it was true because he had not been talking to Tom in a while?

July 16, 2017

Tom in LA for the D23 Expo.  Z photographed by fans at a hotel where she is staying in LA. -> Tom and Zendaya are both in LA is the info, I’m guessing? IRRELEVANT.

July 17, 2017

Paparazzi catches Z and Tom together in Tom’s car in LA.  No friends, family, or personal assistants are in the car with them.  It appears Noon is on the backseat.  Z immediately Snapchats the story. 

Note:  Damage control. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together. “Damage control“ is once again an ASSUMPTION.

August 8, 2017

During an interview with Variety, Z denies dating Tom. -> *dramatic sigh*

August 18 - 20 (Weekend)

Tom filming Chaos Walking in Montreal.  Tom MIA during the weekend – Haz spotted and photographed without Tom. -> Putting Tom and Zendaya together because Tom was MIA and Haz was spotted alone is an INTERPRETATION/ASSUMPTION.

Z flew on a private jet to what appears to be Montreal to see Tom for the weekend. -> ASSUMPTION.

September 1, 2017

Z’s birthday.  Tom posts pics from the same Spider-man photo shoot Z used for his birthday post.  Tom states:  “Miss you” and Z replies with “Shawty” and a heart emoji. -> Co-workers/friends supporting one another.

September 21, 2017

Z snaps a scary pic of herself in a KC Undercover statue costume stating, I just tried to call you a billion times.  Tom posts a photo of himself on IG with the caption:  Yours  -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

Analysis:  Are these two posts related?  You be the judge. -> INTERPRETATION.

September 29 - October 1, 2017

Tom was MIA over the weekend and Z was quiet most of the day on Saturday. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

Saturday evening Z snapped two catered courses along with the chef and his assistant who were present in her kitchen.  The snap showed five plates in total on Z’s kitchen island counter.  Darnell had two friends over at Z’s house earlier that day.  They were in Z’s pool and were playing with Noon, but Z wasn’t with them.  When Z snapped the catered food, it appears she is alone with the chef and his assistant.  The chef posted on his IG account both courses that Z snapped plus a dessert, but the second course was slightly different from the one Z posted in that it had meat while the one Z snapped was vegetarian, but otherwise it was the same in presentation and appearance.  Note:  Z is a vegetarian, but Tom isn’t. -> IRRELEVANT INFO. Trying to tie Tom and Zendaya together in this is far fetched and an ASSUMPTION/INTERPRETATION.

Tom wasn’t seen or photographed in Las Vegas this weekend (Haz was in Vegas all weekend for his step-brother’s bachelor party). -> IRRELEVANT INFO. His absence doesn’t put him together with Zendaya.

Harry appeared to be alone in Montreal on Friday night, and to have gone fishing with a Chaos Walking crew member over the weekend. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

On October 1, Tom posts an IG story on an airplane.  The flight is Air Canada 798 non-stop LA to Montreal scheduled departure 11:40 a.m.

Tom photographed arriving in Montreal on the night of October 1, approximately five hours after posting his IG story on the plane (the flight from LA to Montreal takes approximately 5 hours).

Analysis:  Tom spent the weekend in LA with Z. -> Putting Tom and Zendaya together due to his silence, being apart from both Haz and Harry and being on a flight from LA to Montreal is an ASSUMPTION. PS: Stalkerish behavior at its peak.

October 2-11, 2017

10/2 – Z arrived in NY

10/3-10/11 – Z appears on Good Morning America and later attends the Without a Net premiere on 10/3, attends Bruno Mars concert on 10/4, is spotted by fans and paps in NY on 10/5, and snaps what appears to be a photo shoot with her stylist, Law Roach on 10/6.  Z photographed by paps in NY on 10/7 and then disappears until 10/11 when she is photographed at an event in NY.

Note:  NY to Montreal is only 1.5 hours by plane. -> Putting Tom and Zendaya together due to her silence/unknown whereabouts is an ASSUMPTION.

10/7 – Tom in Atlanta for MCU 10th anniversary photo shoot.  It appears he returns to Canada later that night.  Z rumored to be in Atlanta but there is no photographic evidence, and she was not in the published 10th anniversary photo. -> ASSUMPTIONS.

10/8 – Haz stories himself and Harry shopping without Tom. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

10/9 – Monday, Canadian Thanksgiving.  Tom may have had the day off. -> ASSUMPTION.

10/11 – Jetlux, the private jet company Z uses, reposted a photo of Z.  Z is later photographed at an event in NY.  Did she fly Jetlux from Montreal to NY on 10/11?  It would appear so. -> ASSUMPTION. Plus, Stalkerish behavior at its peak.

Haz IG stories the boys (Haz, Harry, and Tom) watching Mean Girls at their house in the Saint-Paulin area in Canada. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

10/12 – Z returns to LA and resumes snapping -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

Analysis:  Z, the queen of Snapchat, did not snap Saturday, 10/7 through Wednesday, 10/11.  Then snap, snap snap, she was back in LA as of Thursday, October 12.  She was in NY on October 2 through 7, and then again on October 11.  But where was she during October 8 through 10?  Frolicking in Canada with her “freind”, perhaps? -> ASSUMPTIONS.

October 31, 2017

Zendaya carves a Spider-man pumpkin for Halloween on her App. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

November 16-28, 2017

11/16 – Tom wraps Chaos Walking and states he is returning home to do nothing with his beautiful Tess and relax until Christmas time.

11/17 – Tom flies to LA

11/18 – Tom spotted at Target near Z’s house.

11/20– Z takes a red eye flight to NY for The Greatest Showman event at Bloomingdale’s.

11/21 – Tom goes spinning with Claire, Z’s mom, while Z is in NY. 

11/23 (Thanksgiving) – Z and Tom spotted together at the cinema.

11/24 – Tom and Z spotted at an In-N-Out. 

11/25 – Kamil snapchats during a belated Thanksgiving get together at Z’s house.  In Kamil’s snap, Z has an arm resting on her chair that appears to be Tom’s. 

-> All of the above: Tom not going home immediately and spending time with Zendaya in LA is what makes Spidermaninlove ASSUME that they are dating, but it’s all just INTERPRETATION. Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

11/26 – Tom and Z posted IG stories and snaps of their trip to the mall.  While they were there, they were spotted by and photographed with many fans.  Posting the trip before the fans did is what Z calls damage control. -> Knowing what „damage control“ is for Zendaya is once again an ASSUMPTION.

In the videos, Z is wearing giraffe earrings.  Tom once called Z a “giraffe of an actress” while she was teasing him about his shoe lifts in his Lip Sync Battle dressing room.  So were these earrings a gift from Tom? -> ASSUMPTION/INTERPRETATION.

11/28 – Z and Tom spotted together at the Cheesecake Factory. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

November 30, 2017

Tom returns to London. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

December 3-7, 2017

12/3 – Z arrives in London for The Greatest Showman press tour. -> IRRELEVANT INFO.

12/5 – It appears to be Tom’s voice calling Darnell, who accompanied Z to London, an “alchie” in Darnell’s IG story while he is purchasing Moet from a vending machine. -> ASSUMPTION.

12/6 – It appears Tom is behind Z in a fan photo taken in London. -> ASSUMPTION.

12/7 – Tom is spotted at Z’s hotel in London and then flies to NY. -> Co-workers/friends hanging out together.

Z arrives in NY for The Greatest Showman press and premiere.

December 8, 2017

Tom attended The Greatest Showman premiere in NY aboard the Queen Mary 2. -> Co-workers/friends supporting one together. Jacob B. was there too.

December 9, 2017

Interviewer, Sean O’Connell, saw Tom in the lobby of the hotel where he was interviewing Z. 

Note:  Tom was staying with Z in her hotel room. -> Co-workers/friends supporting one another. Tom staying in Zendaya‘s hotel room is an ASSUMPTION. Apparently one of Law’s (Zendaya/Tom’s stylist) interns ”confirmed” they shared a hotel room but that could be an interpretation on their part. Were they hanging out together in said room while the intern was there or were they sharing it? There is a difference.

It appears Tom was at Z’s family dinner in NY.  His forehead can be seen seated next to where Z and her dad were sitting. -> ASSUMPTION.

December 12, 2017

Us Weekly reported the following today:

“Tom has met Zendaya’s family and they love him,” a source close to the actress told Us Weekly. “They are still seeing each other, it’s been about a year.”

Though the couple has played coy since the news of their relationship broke earlier this year, they were spotted celebrating the premiere of Zendaya’s second movie ever, The Greatest Showman, at Bobby Van’s Central Park South. An onlooker tells Us that the British actor charmed her parents during the dinner party. -> IRRELEVANT INFO because it’s press.

December 29, 2017 - January 8, 2018

December 29, 2017 – In Haz’s IG story, it appears Tom is packing a carry on bag. -> ASSUMPTION.

Darnell was in New York December 31, 2017 through January 7, 2018.

December 31, 2017 – Noon was with Z’s mom, Claire.  Z FaceTimed with her niece, Marlee, who lives in the LA area.

Analysis:  Z was not in LA on 12/31/17. -> ASSUMPTION.

After December 31, 2017,  Z went virtually ghost on SM.

Tom’s friends, Haz and Tuwaine, were photographed and video recorded at a New Year’s eve party in London.  It appears Tom did not attend. -> ASSUMPTION.

January 1, 2018 – Noon still with Claire

January 6, 2018 – Tom’s uncle, Paul Holland tweeted he saw Tom in the London area today for about one hour.

January 7, 2018 – Z did not attend the Golden Globes

January 8, 2018 – Z is spotted and photographed in London at the airport and returning on a flight to LA.  She was traveling alone (Darnell was not with her).

-> All of the above: Both Tom and Zendaya being silent/with unknown whereabouts is what makes Spidermaninlove ASSUME, that they spend the time together. It’s an INTERPRETATION of events.

2017 is a turning point for shippers. They believe, without solid proof, evidence, whatever, that Tom and Zendaya are dating and it's a fact. No matter what these two individuals do, it's linking them together in some way. It's all just assumptions and interpretations at this point but shippers quickly build a huge following, tricking people into beoieving that Tom and Zendaya are in fact dating.

[iampikachuhearmeroar]

sometime in this last week, or this week coming, my blog has turned/turns 10. god. a decade old. a whole ass chunk of my life i’ve spent on this hellsite. when i began on here, i was a kid. a lost, lonely, depressed and anxious 15/16 year old kid. a kid scared of her future. a kid confused about her future. what to do for uni. to change schools or not??? to do drama/acting at uni or english/philosophy or to move 8hrs away to another regional uni to “escape” her “washed up, dead end hometown” that was so typical of all the pop-punk music that she was listening to at the time.

she was a tad overdramatic, loud, “funny” (as described by her school friends) and terribly forgetful in regards to homework and school assignments. she was angry at the world, most especially the catholic school she was fucking sick and tired of attending. but she was convinced that since she was the so-called “funny girl”, that she simply couldn’t be depressed or anxious. she believed herself unloveable because she didn’t look like a weird mixture of hayley williams and emo-pop queen lights. but now, i no longer believe that i have to look like the women that i looked up to in the ~emo scene~. fuck beauty standards. i am loveable.

in the years since joining tumblr, i’ve managed to get through business college, my undergrad degree and, well, failed out of postgrad due to obvious burnout and health issues amongst other things. although i’ve lost many friends irl and many followers/mutuals online on here. for those who’ve stuck around to see me get through all of this, thank you. to all the friends/casual mutuals that have since deactivated or only followed me for a short time then unfollowed; thank you.

like obviously i was never/have never been a massive popular blog on here, like thebootydiaries or vampireapologist (who has since deactivated a couple of months ago) with tens of thousands of followers. my follower count is still close to the 8,000 range at 7,892. obviously that’s still a lot of people (and of course, porn bots lmao and many, many non-active blogs), enough like one super old post from like 2012 tumblr pointed out, enough for a small to medium sized city or town, or something like that. i don’t know how many people i’ve really reached. i really don’t know how i actually amassed this small army of people.

i am aware though, that on other platforms like snapchat (lmao does anyone even use it anymore in 2021???)/instagram/youtube/tiktok etc, i’d PROBABLY be considered as some type of ~micro influencer (🤮🤮)~. hell, i actually had a bot slide into my notes about being one on here on this hellsite back in 2019. i don’t know if i’ve ever actually ~influenced~ anyone on here with my shitposts (when i started making some) or my personal posts. i don’t know my reach. even though, now, i do occasionally get featured on buzzfeed listicles (although pay me buzzfeed along with the OPs of those original embedded posts), i still don’t know how many people i’ve reached… and even with my very occasional checks of google analytics lmao. on top of this, grappling with the loss of followers at times is much, much easier than it was when i began on here and the first few years following that. i know that my follower count doesn’t determine my worth and stuff.

but over these 10 years, i have grown. i turn 26 this year. back in 2011, 15/16yo me never thought she’d be here. she was partially down the suicidal thoughts hole, with things about ~picturing her funeral and wondering who’d bother to turn up. if only she could pretend to be dead for a day to see who’d give a fuck~ and 16-18yo me was defs down it with her HSC hellscape thoughts in 2012/2013. that 3rd floor tafe/tech women’s bathroom window drop and the thought of scarring her class for life (and that cool dude from catholic school that she crushed on who ended up at tafe with her) with jumping out of it onto the concrete below. instead, she just posted on fb about ~being a failure~ etc which ultimately did lose her a bunch of facebook friends lmao. it was practically the same thing. her mental breakdown after the end of her hsc, where she let her earrings go green and get infected in her ears because “fuck self care, bc what the fuck is it??? i’ll never get better! let me fucking wallow in my self loathing bc it’s the only thing that i’m fucking good at!!!” so i no longer have my ears pierced. oh! it was just all too fucking much!!

i am happier today. i no longer have those semi-suicidal thoughts. hell, i almost died in 2020 from a fucking bowel aneurysm, after my stomach tumour excision surgery. that forced me to put things into perspective. i appreciate the little things . i appreciate the very few friends that i actually have. yes. i’m still depressed and anxious. some days are still shitty and hard. but nowhere as hard and shitty as they were back when i began on here 10 years ago.

how the fuck last 10 years have gone past, with my ass on here; clearing out my blog and caring more about doing that than my uni work (lmao whoops); having made some lifelong friends both internationally (from the US) and long distance domestically in australia, it’s been a long ride; i honestly have no fucking idea. obviously over these past 10 years, i’ve debated with myself over and over and over again whether i should delete/deactivate this account or not. would it make me healthier??? more than likely. but then when i have meltdowns or just inner ramblings i have to get out somewhere, where else to post??? on fb?? obvs not. it’s “attention seeking” or the like on there. no one will read them. no one will resonate. but on here??? even if i got/get one “like” in the notes or one “yo i feel this” response in the tags or replies, it feels like i’ve reached someone??? okay yeah. i know this place IS NOT therapy and i’m not using my followers as amateur (or probs even actual professional) armchair psychologists…. which is a thing i think people need to stop doing internet-wide: but that’s a whole other post that i reblogged a few days ago lmao. i really need to get another therapist, actually lmao.

but it’s the community i’ve found hard to leave. i have what feel like friends, when i’ve never been employed (still as of yet); and when all of my irl friends/acquaintances are working and doing the whole ~adulting~ and ~grown up life~ thing right. it’s also the frenzied rabidness of spite with hating staff’s godawful ideas. the memes. oh the memes. and also the RaWrInG 20s XD emo scene reemergence on here that’s kept me here. the messy petty drama from time to time of big blogs fighting it out.

this place really is bizarre and fun sometimes. and also the fact that i can still hide behind the ridiculous “roaring pikachu” URL that i made all those years ago. i am anonymous. it’s freeing. but on fb it’s all like “WHY WONT YOU ADD A BANNER IMAGE AND TELL US 20 FUN FACTS ABOUT YOU!!!!!???? LET PEOPLE WHO HAVENT SPOKEN TO YOU IN 10 YEARS KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU BECAUSE WE’RE ALL FRIENDS HERE!!!” and the same goes for Corporate Hellscape Facebook™️ (linkedin) but in the professional sense instead. y’all know fuck all about me really. besides my posts. and i love that and live for that. okay yeah. y’all know more about my mental health than my fb feed obvs… which is probably a terribly unfortunate thing. but still.

over the last 10 years then, my superiority complex for being ~so original and intelligent~ or whatever the fuck i had in high school, has all but ebbed away. i’m not that smart just because i went to uni. hell, i literally did NONE of my in-class work and none of my philosophy readings in uni….. so i have fuck all idea of how i got through undergrad like that lmao. i’m not original when so many people can articulate the same thoughts that i have, but like, sometimes better, on a post (even though sometimes/most of the time the Tumblr User Hot Takes Tuesday™️ takes on here are fucking awful lmao). but still. originality is not something i really have anymore. or really had in the first place lmao.

so will i deactivate after these 10 years, like i’ve been saying for so, so long??? i honestly have no idea. but just know. thanks guise. have a nice gpoy selfie day XD. grab your wands. your tardises. grab your war paint. grab your whatever the fuck other fandom specific stuff that was one that hella cringe post from 2011 til 2015 random tumblr. that relic is as old as time itself. just as this mysterious roaring pikachu is for someone whose too loyal to leave this W E B B E D H E L L S I T E that’s just as much of a train wreck as she is. lmao.

[deepdonutkid]

Social media and the Shelby Family

Let’s go from youngest to oldest…

Finn, as said in the first part, is an influencer, who likes to live his life online. He tweets a lot, he has a ton of insta stories and likes to keep his followers updated. Also he follows some trends like trying bubble tee or these weird tik tok dances. Finn even bribed his brothers to try some with him. They refused of course. Tommy said a no and walk right out of the room. John laughed and brushed it off. Arthur tried, but failed hilariously. Good for him, that Finn was teaching him the steps and not filmed the miserable attempt.   Michael did and was actually good… and Ada did quite okay. Well, Polly wasn’t even asked, because Finn already knew her answer was no.

A lot of his pictures online are with his friends, especially Jesaja.  They skate sometimes and film their tricks. (I added this, because I saw a video of Finn’s Actor- Harry Kirton- skating and I thought it also fit Finn) Whenever he is eating something instagramable, he definitely take a picture. Finn also take good selfies, but he only uses funny filters. So no Dog ears or sparkly flowers here!

He answers messages mostly direct, no waiting time, ‘cus this guy doesn’t play games, but as a Gen Z he would definitely be scared of phone calls. Especially if it’s Polly and there are already two missed calls. Then he just freaks out right away.

And to add a little funny extra: Finn tried among us on his phone and he is kinda sus!

His Whatsapp status would be: “my milkshake brings all the bees to my car. Shit… there are bees in my car!”

-.-.-.-.-

Michael is king of selfie. He knows he looks like god’s gift to the women and he plays that card. His phone is filled with all kinds of selfies. Little narcissist, here! Well, he needs to take a picture from every ankle to capture his beauty.

He also posts some stories on insta, but not so often like Finn. Michael keeps it casual. Just a few party pictures with friends or something super cool like new car.  

But as we all know Michael Gray, he likes to play games with da ladies. So sometimes you wouldn’t even get a goodnight from him. If you tease him, he’ll tease back. Probably posts a picture with another woman. She is just a friend, but you’ll not know that. Yes, he can be mean, but if you’ll call him drunk and late at night, that you miss him, he’ll be glad to hear that.

His status would be: “P1 cleaner than your church shoes.” And yes, this is a weeknd lyric from the song starboy

-.-.-.-.-.-

Ada. Yes. I almost forgot her. How could I? She is gorgeous!

Already mentioned in part one… She knows her stuff pretty well. Technology… no problem for this gal right here. Ada can hack into stuff and write codes and programs, but this also made her very aware of data getting misused or stolen from bots. This is why she chose to keep distance from social media. She doesn’t use the gram or snapchat or whatsoever, but she uses secure text messenger and is likely to be found on a super dank meme page and to understand the memes you need the knowledge of years and years internet culture. And Ada talks to Finn and Michael about unprotected data and how they shouldn’t spill so much information about them online.  

But she takes a lot of pictures from her kids, her husband, her cute outfits, her house and garden, their vacations. She doesn’t use a normal cloud and prefers to show you the pictures together. One after one and she’s making a comment to every single one of them. About that she could talk for hours.

Her status would be… well, she wouldn’t have any!

-.-.-.-.-.-

So… John-boy! Here isn’t much to say. He uses Instagram, but it’s a rare thing. John might follow some artist, so he is up to date for new concerts to go to and also some friends, but that’s it. On a good day which happens to be every half year he might post a picture, when he went somewhere. To get a new tattoo or if he went to see a game, probably soccer and rugby. If he gets the chance to travel, he’ll make pictures, but he totally forgets to post them or even show them to his family. He prefers to talk with his brothers about the experience of traveling and not starting a slide show.

What he is talking pictures of? Selfies are rare, but do happen, if they are a special request from a gal… and it’s probably shirtless, ‘cus he has got the body.  Then again, he took pictures, if he was abroad, not on the usual roads, but only a few. While texting he might send a funny meme, if he sees any and thinks of you. And the occasional picture of “Look what I just got”… and it’s a Vinyl or a band shirt. Even though, he answers his family rarely, when he is in Birmingham, he’d be texting with his lady a lot, having this grin on his face, while Ada asks who he is writing to.

His status would be something like: “punk in drublic.” Which is a festival for said genre, but he just finds it funny. Likely to add “Y/N with an emoji of choice”, when he is in a relationship.

-.-.-.-.-.-

Tommy hates social media and refuses to try it for a long time, but Finn uses it so much, that Tommy had a little interest, what’s going on there. His youngest brother had a lot of explaining to do, which probably went like:

T: “How do I tell the person I like the picture?”

F: “There is the comment button.”

T: “No, I mean the… like thing.”

F: “Double tap on the picture, Tom.”

T: “Good, so… what’s next?”

F: “Nothing. What should happen?”

T: *shrug* “So, this is completely useless!” *deletes the app immediately*

And Tommy is also not the guy to answer private messages directly or often. Sometimes you said on read for days with this fellow, because he is super busy and doesn’t have the time to type. If you’re lucky, you get a quick okay. But if it’s important, he’ll call you right away and asks what happened, and if you need any help. With business he always answers straight and don’t like to waste time.

He doesn’t take pictures really. There may be some incidences where he hit the button by mistake. And there some photos of documents, which he need proof of… so he doesn’t have to rip out a page from a book like its 1920s. And all the pictures of his family has been send to him, he just don’t delete them.

His status would be: “Available” or “At work. Only important calls.”

-.-.-.-.-.-

Arthur… well… he has Facebook and uses it like anyone going on forty… really weird boomer mems, that might have been funny ten years ago. He sends them to everyone and they’re so annoyed by it, but he spares Tommy as his time is too important to waste on ‘funny pictures’.

Some gave him an Echo thing, the one with Alexa, you know, and he was so frustrated by it, that he threw the thing against the wall. Arthur couldn’t get past the set-up and got to angry. His family laughed about it, but it’s better this way.

Thanks to Finn and his little videos, Arthur became a meme himself, because his little brother filmed him while Arthur did something ridiculously stupid. That vid went viral. (Unsure what he did exactly)

His status would be: “Hey, there I am using whatsapp!”

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I don’t know what to say about Polly and Freddie… so I leave them out now, but if you have something to add or whatever, feel free to do so!