#like. i get the Rivals But Also Romantic appeal. i get it

[themetalvirus]

ive seen multiple comics that are just sonic and shadow beating each other until they can't stand up anymore and the caption is like "romance <3" i dotn even care if youre being ironic i still think thats kinda fucked up.

[papaiyatree]

people saying that it's ridiculous for sonadow fans to be "eating good" from the sonic prime ep bc most of the ep was them beating up e/o just don't get it. where do you think the appeal is coming from ?

[absolutebl]

Pit Babe - it's time for a Trash Watch!

I had to. Well, no I didn't, but COME ON. It's like Thailand is negging me. Let's burn rubber, shall we? Burn rubbers...?

The things I had been told going in about this show:

it's about car racing (this bores me)

it stars Pavel (my BL ult bias, he is my icon for a reason)

it started as an omegaverse y-novel but the A/B/O aspects would be stripped from the BL series

it's high heat

(There some chatter about whether point 3 was a mistranslation of something the author said, but don't bother me with trifles.)

Here's a definition of omegaverse:

Omegaverse, also known as A/B/O (alpha/beta/omega), is a subgenre of speculative erotic fiction, and originally a subgenre of erotic slash fan fiction. Its premise is that a dominance hierarchy exists in humans, which are divided into dominant "alphas", neutral "betas", and submissive "omegas".[1] This hierarchy determines how people interact with one another in romantic, erotic and sexual contexts.[2] (Wikipedia)

In my experience and opinion, omegaverse archetypes and tropes are often used to strip out female characters (and The Feminine) and as a tool to excuse extreme hyper-masculine behaviors without a critical feminist lens (leading to lazy characterization). Just as heat is an excuse to get nkd quickly, A/O/B is often an excuse for taboo and dubious consent actions and behaviors. Do I get why writers/readers enjoy it? Yes I do. Do I personally like it? Not particularly. (Although there are always exceptions.)

Putting all that aside, the above represents my foundational knowledge before Pit Babe started.

Oh and that the familiar BL faces appearing in this show were follows:

Pavel Naret (aka Pavel Phoom) from 2 Moons 2 & Coffee Melody - Pavel is a fluent English speaker, a bit of a drama monger, and a motorcycle rider/car-dude, this role suits him

Nut Supanut from Oxygen & Something in My Room - has an amazing voice, his somewhat wooden acting has improved steadily since Oxygen

Pon Thanapon - one of Star Hunter's stable first seen in the Gen Y series (where he stole the appeal of an intended pair), also v good in Make a Wish, I wish he'd get a lead role as he has a likable screen presence

Pop Pataraphol from La Cuisine - he's playing the Alpha rival and I'm not convinced he's suited to this role

Michael Kiettisak from Love Sick, Oxygen, Call it What You Want, Till the World Ends - playing the comic relief this time rather than his usual tortured stoic... huh

All the rest are either fresh faces or older experienced actors. Interesting mix. They must have some money behind this.

And now, get out your marshmallows! The dumpster is on fire! Let's start the roast.

Episode 1 - Platypus, Pickles, Pavel, & other Smoking Hot Problems

This first segment told with a 4 day retrospect, because I decided to do a trash watch only after @aliceisathome said I should.

My initial reaction:

the sheer audacity of Thailand being like "PitBabe is not omegaverse" and then serving "Alpha" to us on a platter in the first sex scene is

how dare

but also

what the actual fuck is going on? what world are we living in where a/b/o is LIVE ACTION ON OUR SCREENS?

we getting heat, knotting & mpreg next?

apparently this is my reality now

I'm not sure what weird quantum time stream I've jumped into but someone was all,

yes the whole world is hella screwed, but also...

Thailand has decided live action mm fanfic is gonna win it the culture wars

and I'm beginning to think they may be right

BL is now the platypus of the film industry

4 days later:

Considering how much chatter this caused there's a part of me that wondered if it was all intentional and a marketing ploy (to say it wasn't omegaverse when obviously it is). In which case... brilliant Machiavellian tactics, production.

But Thai studios are rarely this calculated in their promo. So I think it's all accidental. But it certainly caused a raucous few days on Tumblr.

On a completely different note, Babe's house looks like it started life as a particularly inventive Olive Garden. Or is that just me?

More random thoughts:

Pavel has had work done, why honey? You were the definition of perfect.

The smell thing is great, I love stuff to do with scent and necks. If omegaverse brings this to the table, fine. But...

Being all Alpha perfect butch manly man = I do not like Babe at all, I kinda want him to be brought down a peg. (Woo... pegging!) I never like narratives that glorify the captain of the football team (side eyes Cdrama CEO romances and Love O2O), Babe better have depth and damage (forget the pegging) of some kind or his behavior will get old FAST, faster than he drives (also, forget the pegging idea)

Nut is ideal in the Beta role. I mean, that's Way's character right? We all can see that. If it's not intentional, it's a miscast. I love how soft he is as as screen presence. He's great in this part.

None of the other characters are sticking out to me yet, but I'm prepared to love the side dishes in this, please make them swoon worthy!

I'm glad they didn't hold the Charlie = trickster reveal off, I like knowing he is a double agent up front.

Finally, with respect to an adequate trash watch, I'm in a pickle.

How am I going to drink for this show when there is so much else airing on Frigay? I can't keep track, if I'm drunk.

I need a strategy for this trash fire if the puns and snark are to spout forth! (HA Fourth!)

Controlled burn?

Anygay, see you all next week.

Episode 2 - Side Dish Addiction + Second Lead Syndrome are both infecting me at once

[FYI I gotta have my backup computer to watch this so that's why Imma sometimes be delayed getting the trash out to the curb.]

3 minutes! 3 minutes in and I needed to pause and wax snarkful. (Ouch, bet that hurts. Is waxing snark similar to a Brazilian but for BL? Is that why they all so hairless in The Sign?... I digress, where was I?)

Okay so the subber said Daddy but I don't think that word means what they think it means. Because Way said simply nong paa.

Usually they'll use the English word Daddy (pronounced Dah-deee) for, ya know, Actual Daddies (tm).

Wait wait:

Calling Daddy Actual

(My dumb sci-fi loving arse will see myself out the back before I start drawing Battlestar Galactica = Pit Babe connections. TOO FAR ABL. Too far.)

Look, I like the tension in this show. It's good to set up an unlikeable Alpha dog and then immediately turn him into an underdog, makes him a bit more likable. I still don't like Babe, but now at least I'm on his side.

Charlie = cute but v sus. Fortunately for him, Babe = cute but v thick.

Everyone calls Charlie Babe's dek. Yes sounds a bit like what you think but also means kid/child and SHOULD be translated as boy in this show. Why doesn't the subber get that? They a sub...ber after all. (I'll see myself out.)

Honestly, the script writers might know what they are doing with abo but our eng sub translator sadly does NOT. I'm so glad this is coming now in my BL watching life. When my ear and knowledge of Thai is so much better than it once was. Others much be SO CONFUSED.

Snicker. They just fucking with us, but it's fun to watch the mpeg speculation abound.

File this one under: Thailand's trouble with ESL plurals and also "you should have Pavel helping with these subs" sweethearts.

Production knows entirely what it's doing with this show and its omegaverse shizz (even if the subber doesn't) and I am very much enjoying the online carnage that results.

This dumpster fire continues off screen into the blogosphere and I continue to roast things over it.

Meanwhile, hi Pon! You so adorable! When you gonna lead out a BL for us?

Is Idol Factory stealing all of Star Hunter's talent? Are they the Red Racers of the BL world? These are the questions I ask myself as I watch this.

Is that AGE GAP I smell before me?

Is the 20 yr old college kid meant for the pit boss? Cause you all know I am a slut for age gaps.

Moment of a/b/o: Jeff's fear of touch/heightened personal space would be a plot marker for "baby doesn't want Alphas close cause he smells like an omega" but of course this show it not omegaverse. Not omegaverse at all.

nuh-uh

Linguistic corner!

Lung (sounds a bit like loo) is uncle(ish) it means basically a male relation older than phi. So Alan is the oldest in the crew.

Alan calls Jeff nu (which the subber translated as boy I would have gone with cutie or little one). Nu is a diminutive affectionate term that's technically gender neutral but is most often used by/on cute girls/women. Jeff did NOT like it. Then Alan sort of dodges through pronouns/particles settling on phi for I, ger for you, and ja for a particle. This is interesting because ger & ja kinda lower his age and status into a casual sphere. Not more intimate more equal to jeff... fascinating.

I love the new "Korean" red racer, he drinks my brand of soy milk. He is now my baby snake in the grass.

Get it? Snake.

He and Babe should end up together.

The fight wasn't bad, do both actors have kickbox training in their backgrounds?

Who am I kidding, I care only about Uncle Alan and Nu Jeff now. All others are irrelevant to me.

Also...

WHERE IS A BOY FOR WAY?!!! Or a Daddy. I do not care. (Methinks nether does he.)

I am now captain of the Way Appreciation Society. Let's all find a way... to get him some dick.

Also the BTS stingers are tons of fun. Looks like the set was a blast.

Finally, and I mean this kindly. Why isn't Noh Phouluang in this? He should have been cast as Winner. Bah. I'm biased.

But one should be with Noh.

Episode 3 - Side Dishes Delux

Gayest bridge n Thailand has made its obligatory appearance.

How much do I love uncle & nu? They are SO damn cute. Also nu flustered is the best kind of nu.

I could not care less about Babe and Charlie. Except I do love the smell thing.

Way will break my heart by getting his broken. He is right tho.

Tra la la. I feel like this is a bit like KP 2.0.

Charlie is a such a princess (and ace manipulator). Good thing Babe clearly likes being buttered up.

Babe's backstory was more interesting than I expected, I didn't think we would go so far into the paranormal side of a/b/o. I like it and I hope they lean into it quite a bit more. Make it part of the plot.

Unlike the kissing thing which seems to have been gotten over rather quickly.

I gotta say I'm enjoying the corporate sponsorship jockeying and tension more than I thought I would. I'm curious as to who Jef and Charlie are working for and what their motivation is. The plot itself is keeping me intrigued and that is rare for me with BL.

So no trash talk this ep, I was largely absorbed and entertained. I didn't event need booze. Shocking behavior on my part.

#giveWayaboy2023

Episode 4 - I (who never ship) am shipping the impossible

Here’s the thing. I just want this to be a better story than it is. Right now it’s kind of like a soap opera. I don’t hate lakorn, I really don't. To Sir With Love is a glorious chewing of the diamanté scenery (completed with death glitter). But...

If this is gonna be a soap opera it needs to lean into the messy side more than the tailored high concept side. Support characters and evil needs more screen time.

Instead, right now, I don’t know where I am with this show because it doesn't know where it wants to be. I’m kind of dangling in the middle of a dirty situation. It’s uncomfortable for me, and the show feels uncomfortable for the performers. 

Also... I have questions.

Yes, of course I want to know what Charlie & Jeff are up to. Why can Jeff see the future?

But more importantly I NEED to know why Babe has a flying saucer bed?

That kind of lighting makes nobody look good, especially not at that angle. It’s very traumatic and I’m not wild about the shag rug either. I have concerns about Babe's taste. I guess is what I am saying. 

On a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT note:

There’s absolutely no chemistry to justify this, but I have decided that I am going to personally advocate for, and ship, Way and the interloping not-really-Korean. They are both sort of own-moral-code types. I have tiny crush on Kim, and Nut is the prettiest, and Way is Best Boy so there it is, I would like them to hook up, please & thank you.

#giveWay2Kim2023

Arrow guy is cute, too. Will we get to see him bone?

Is he going to be another one of the adopted alpha super-kid pets?

What the hell, throw Arrow Boy a bone! All hot boys in BLs deserve bones.

Plot thickens.

Hah.

Thickens.

(I am an immature idiot.)

Episode 5 - wait wait way-t, can arrow boy have Way?

Look, BLabies, I didn’t get any screen caps this episode because frankly there wasn’t anything worth capturing.

I guess Charlie really does love Babe? Very dramatic if idiotic saving from the burning car. But Babe has gone to the broken Alpha place of extremely unlikeablability (frankly he was almost there at the start). If I were Charles B Spectacled I would be OUT by now. 

Is that?

NO.

Don't get the plastic bowl.

No white towel sponge bath. Please kill this trope.  

I mean, it's not as bad as singing, but that's because NOTHING is as bad as singing in a Thai BL.

AND the main boys are back together.

I don’t find their relationship or Babe’s lack of senses a particularly interesting aspect of the plot.

Unless, of course, Babe is pregnant and that's why he lost his Alpha sniffer.

BUT I do love the sides.

Jeff = the introvert precog who can’t/wont do people and Alan = the extrovert people person who WANTS but doesn’t understand him. 

Were Jeff and Charlie ALSO raised by Evil Daddy MacEvilPants? 

I liked the way Arrow CEO & Way looked at each other. Way, hon, give up on Babe (he sucks) and get thyself a billionaire bf with great aim and BDE.

On a completely different note, the best thing about this show is the blooper reel. That thing with the green smoothie going down his pants was hilarious!

In conclusion, this was a green smoothie down the pants episode. I was entertained, and it’s probably gonna be good for the plot in retrospect, but it was kind of squishy and unpleasant at the time.

Episode 6 - Are they actually listening to us now? Is Tumblr bugged?

This was a fun ep full of like actual racing and shizz.

Whatever.

Charlie is on the team now. All the teams, apparently.

Can we talk about Jeff and Alan?

The apology scene! Did you hear that Alan dropped to chan/ger? Eeeee!!! So cute. (He equalized their relationship in a soft way.)

Get it with that language play hottie. Next up: lengua play.

Please & thank you. 

Meanwhile, as all of the Internet knows, they went fully in for omegaverse - no bars.

I have to say, one of the greatest typos (or whatever) in existence is enigma instead of omega.

That's where I personally would rank in the omegaverse.

Hello, my gender is... enigma.

 Apparently it's a/b/o and sometimes e!  Also sometimes switch-ee 

Oh I'm very proud of myself with that one.

Funfunfun

Charlie. Babes. When a man asks to be thrown up against the wall. You throw him against that wall.

OMG is that arrow boy looking at Way in the bar?

3 seconds later.

Noooo.

Wait come back.

Noooooo.

That’s what I actually want to watch! 

OMG. Who said nu was the first step to teelak?

I flipping love Alan. 

Ah the boyfriend ep. Thank you, but I still don't trust Charlie.

Poor Way.

But nice crying jag, and I don’t say that often in Thai BL.

Now let him go, Way.

A boy with his arrows is waiting. 

(source)

Note for the future: tumblr has a bug that stops allowing edits after a certain time/number, thus my full trash often occur in 2 segments as a result. Click on the "abl trash watches bl" tag for the full thing if you're reading this and later episodes are missing.

[saccharineomens]

i've been poking at this too long to care how visually appealing it is anymore. My headcanons for the main characters' sexualities, based on canon information! (has no bearing on ships.) Canon speculation below the cut.

marcille (bi): fascinated by romance and loves romance. we only see her show explicit interest in a male (fictional character (General Halleus from the book series she loves)), but i don't think she's fully straight.

falin (aro? ace? lesbian? genderqueer?): falin's only interest in relationships in canon is 'she considered accepting shuro's proposal because she was afraid nobody else would want her, but felt it'd be unfair to him because she had no feelings for him'. i consider whether she's aroace or a lesbian or maybe bi/pan, and she also seems like she might have some genderqueer feelings, based on some of her discomfort with her body and wearing certain types of femme clothing. (Also the fact that she‘s part male dragon.) Since she ends the story going on a journey for herself, it feels like she'll finally get the chance to figure out what she wants.

laios (pan, demi): he hasn't shown explicit interest in men, but similar to marcille, i don't feel he's fully straight. He’s aesthetically attracted to monsters, at the very least, so gender probably doesn’t factor in for him. romance/sex just don’t seem to be much of a high priority to him in general, but he did think his ex-fiance was cute and didn't seem uncomfortable with the idea of marriage (just seemed unhappy with being trapped in his hometown), so i feel like demisexuality fits him well.

About his succubus: He was very noticeably not stopped in his tracks by it like Chilchuck and Marcille, but that could possibly be because it just….looked exactly like Marcille, not an obvious fantasy. He started blushing and stammering heavily when it turned into a monster, which like….this boy is definitely a furry/monsterfucker, if anything, but that doesn’t speak on his attraction to actual humans.

I think it speaks for something that the succubi are able to literally read minds and craft the perfect fantasy for their specific target. And for Laios, it wasn’t just “his friend Marcille”. It was a version of his friend Marcille that wasn’t grossed out by monsters, didn’t think he was weird for wanting to be one, and was able to turn Laios into one. It was a Marcille who understood him at his deepest level that made him become a blushing, stammering mess to rival Chilchuck. Which is why I think he’s Demi, and needs a strong emotional connection with someone before he finds them attractive.

kabru (pan): his special interest is people, and he's bold enough with his sexuality to kiss rin despite not being in a relationship with her. so being pan/bi feels appropriate.

chilchuck (bi): he has a wife, and they were childhood friends, so he's definitely allo. but his comments and behavior towards senshi makes me suspect he might be bi, and just never considered the possibility due to being in a committed relationship.

senshi (gay, ace): this is 90% off of vibes. he keeps to himself in the dungeon and doesn't seem to have any need for social company, he's a complete hermit. Being ace makes sense to me, but so would him just having a low social drive. His succubus was 'a woman he hadn't seen since he was a child', but his journal implies it wasn't a romantic/sexual attraction.

namari (bi/lesbian): she is at the very least attracted to women, given her behavior with kiki, but she does make a point to say that kaka is also attractive to her, and her friends at the bar tease her about Kaka being her “new” boyfriend (implying previous boyfriends).

shuro: the token straight (in love with falin, asked her to marry him). i love you shuro <3 (but i can also see him being into men. there's no evidence to the contrary)

izutsumi: aroace. literally no question. her succubus is her mother.

[punksocks]

Sagittarius & Where You Attract Foreigners

*just based on my experiences, please only take what resonates

As someone with Sag Venus I’ve been lucky enough to travel and live in places outside of my hometown. These experiences have had a mix of good and bad, and after many friendships and relationships outside of my culture I have a theory that Sagittarius in your chart can show where you are seen as interesting/attractive to foreigners/people outside of your culture. This is a neutral trait that can go positively or negatively, but I believe it can expand your horizons to look into this! (Also this is for developed placements, as I find underdeveloped Sagittarius placements can be a bit dogmatic and pretty closed off to cultures and philosophies outside of their own)

-Sagittarius Sun: Exuding charm and charisma, you may find that your personality itself is attractive to foreigners. A part of the radiance you exude and the opinions you express may give off a certain flexibility that can be welcome in cultures outside of yourself.

-Sagittarius Moon: The depth of your feelings and the way you handle your emotions with humor and philosophical openness can appeal to foreigners. I think this is one reason this is such a common placement for actors. Many people tend to be able to relate to the feelings you project.

-Sagittarius Mercury: A refreshing wit and a depth that can convey understanding outside of yourself. You may also be able to learn many languages with ease. The way you speak in general is notable to foreigners and attention grabbing. Your sense of humor and the jokes you tell may also hit off better with people from a different cultural background.

-Sagittarius Venus: You move through friendships and relationships by injecting a fiery passion throughout all of them. You broaden people’s horizons by interacting with them and people often say your charismatic. You may find yourself in many friendships and romantic relationships with foreigners. You could also find yourself drawn to artistic influences outside of your cultural background.(Hayao Miyazaki is one of my biggest influences and I am not Japanese)

-Sagittarius Mars: Able to philosophize for ages and to move with passion. You charge through life living on your terms. You may find yourself having rivals and lovers that come from cultures outside of your own. You may also find yourself more physically motivated by influenced outside of your cultural background. (Like getting into Tae Kwon Do even though you’re not Korean and you don’t have many other cultural ties to Korean culture)

-Sagittarius Jupiter: Sagittarius in its exalted position. You may be seen as someone jovial that tends to attract a lot of abundance. You may find yourself learning and growing and feeling abundant while traveling and living outside of your country of origin. Foreigners may be friendly with you in general and see you as generally positive.

-Sagittarius Saturn: You may be someone that experiences deep highs and lows with the lessons Saturn brings. You may do a lot of business with people outside of your cultural background and you may be seen as someone that has a general air of luck and longevity in the success of your strategic moves. You may find that your wins are more celebrated with foreigners/ that you have more luck in your dealings with foreigners.

[worldheadcanons]

Can you do Axis x reader x Allies? They are all fighting for reader's love.

☆ axis vs allies: fighting for your love!

starring. . . gender neutral reader and north italy, germany, japan, america, + china.

author notes; this was super fun, i imagined it to be a sort of otome game scenario with multiple routes. like the protagonist/reader goes on dates with everyone until they choose just one person to be with. i couldn’t fit all the main allies in here, sorry anon! lmk if you want a part two for them or any other characters.

feliciano vargas!

— he knows that his colleagues are also interested in you. he’s not particularly discouraged though because, really, who wouldn’t be? you were attractive, intelligent, thoughtful— the whole package. vargas knows he has his own unique charms, traits that the allies and even the another axis don’t have. feliciano is cute and he knows how to use that to his advantage. alfred is cute too, but in a different way. he doubts the boisterous american could sweep you off your feet like he could.

— in terms of competition he views francis and ludwig as his biggest enemies. feliciano is smart enough to not let anyone ruin his personal relationships, so he doesn’t hold any real ill will towards the two. in fact, it’s because he likes them so much, especially ludwig, that he even considers them to be rivals in the first place. francis is very obviously romantic. he was the one who taught vargas the ropes, after all. however his romance was rather.. mature.. meanwhile, the italian preferred to keep his romance light and playful. ludwig was cute in a stoic way. he couldn’t flirt to save his life, but that was part of his appeal. he would give you a small smile as he tried his best to be romantic and your heart couldn’t help but melt.. yea, those two would be trouble.

— he likes to keep dates vague at first, leaving you unsure of whether or not things are platonic or romantic. unlike francis or arthur he doesn’t come on strong. the first dates are still pretty high class though. dinners at expensive restaurants, trips to private beaches, live music shows— feliciano’s willing to spend every dime on you and he’s not afraid to show it. all the while he’s joking and laughing with you, looking you lovingly in the eyes with the cutest boyish smile you’ve ever seen. he’ll whine and complain sometimes, pouting anytime you tease him. he’s pretty childish but he knows when to pull back so that it’s not annoying. 

— when things get really romantic, you’ll know. he’ll take you to more public places. vargas has many family businesses that he’ll frequent with you. it’s his way of saying you’re closer than you were before. vargas will initiate a lot more pda too, holding your hand more often than not and reveling in the feeling of you leaning on his shoulder. he’s not opposed to cheek kisses either. occasionally he’ll ‘miss’ your cheek and nail a kiss close to your lips, hinting at what he could make happen in the future. what he hoped would happen in the future. 

— eventually things will escalate to a point where he’ll personally ask you if you want to be with him or not. not because feliciano views it as a waste of time if you don’t want to continue on, but because he truly wants to be with you. he can’t stand not knowing anymore and he especially can’t stand not having you all to himself. vargas will be respective of your answer no matter what.. but.. he has a feeling you’ll say yes. 

ludwig beilschmidt!

— he’s not particularly confident of himself in this area. romance was not ludwig’s strong suit. he knows that other countries are interested in you as well, which doesn’t help him feel any better. even feliciano was after you! despite it all, his older brother had encouraged him to try to win you over. so here he was. he would try his best. the german didn’t know it, but he had his own charms. he was stoic and sort of inexperienced but still a polite man. many ladies found this to be charming. in a way, his lack of romantic prowess was his power. 

— his biggest competitors, in his mind, are feliciano and alfred. both for reasons he considers obvious. they’re both rather ‘naturally cute’ men. they had this boyish charm while still being mature. alfred was really funny which only helped his case. feliciano was great at romancing others and while ludwig doesn't know much about alfred’s love life, he figured that it was likely the american was the same way. gah.. just thinking about it makes him frown. he’s been at disadvantages before though, so he’s able to convince himself that things will be fine no matter the outcome. his opinion on the two of them doesn’t change because of the situation. beilschmidt understands that no one can help the way they feel. it’s no one man’s fault that they’re all pursuing the same person. he just wishes he didn’t have to go against vargas, one of his closest friends.

— his first dates are.. regular. but not in a bad way. ludwig spends his days beforehand researching and reading up on things like date etiquette, best cafes to take someone out to, good meals to order, conversation tactics, and more. he doesn’t mind putting in the extra work to catch up with the people he’s up against. he’ll try his best to be romantic the whole time by holding doors and complimenting you whenever the opportunity presents itself. he asks a few questions about you, wanting to get to know you for who you really are. your other suitors may take you out to expensive places but they probably weren’t actively trying to learn about you— at least that’s what the german was betting on. 

— dates will slowly but surely become more tuned to your interests and personality. you like to paint? he’ll invite you out to a nice art bar where you two can create something together. you like to read? he’ll take you to a library-cafe. beilschmidt feels that these dates are the most personal. there’s more pda as he really gets comfortable. it’s mostly limited to hand holding. every so often at the end of dates he’ll ask for a kiss. if you oblige and give him one, you’ll get to see a small smile on his face as he admires you lovingly. he may even bite his lip, clearly whipped for you.

— of course, there’ll come a time where he decides to finally ask about your intentions. he asks a little bit later, not wanting to hold you down or force a decision onto you. with the guidance of his older brother, he’ll find the time to sit you down and ask if you want to date him… like, seriously date him. just him. no matter your answer, he’ll still want to be friends with you. he’s gotten to know you so well, he couldn’t just turn away from you. 

kiku honda!

— he’s whipped for you, though it took him a bit longer than everyone else to realize it. kiku mostly labeled what he was feeling as feelings of admiration. once he notices the the pain in chest as he sees francis trying to serenade you, he realizes that he’s in love. deeply in love. it’s a bit awkward when he comes to you later than the other axis and politely asks if he can take you out sometime. despite the awkwardness, you say yes, with a smile. smiles are good. he knows a thing or two about going out with people so he’s not completely stressed about that. anything he doesn’t know he just researches beforehand, similarly to ludwig.

— his biggest competitor for your love, in his opinion, is feliciano. he’s cute, he’s funny— if honda was in your position, he would have folded for the other immediately. he’s a little worried about everyone really because he’s ‘late to the game’, but overall vargas is his biggest threat. things will be okay though, kiku assures himself. he knows he’s cute in his own way. many of his colleagues have commented on the fact that his relaxed expression was a cute one. it was rare for them to see him relaxed as he mostly thought of work related things when he was in their company. for you, however, it wouldn’t be rare to see. honda would make sure of that. 

— the first dates, similarly to yao’s, are formal. they’re not uptight though, as he wants to seem cute to appeal to you as a boyfriend. there’s gift giving here and there, but he mostly focuses on doing things for you. just when you’re too lazy to cook for the night, kiku’s there to pick you up and take you to a luxurious restaurant. anytime you mention something that needs fixing, he’s on it. if he can’t fix it himself, he pays someone to do it in his stead. he insists that it’s normal and that you owe him nothing in return. he just wants to see you prosper, is all. pda is kept to a minimum, seeing as though it takes him a while to even work up the nerve to ask if he can kiss you. when he does finally kiss you, it’s immediately made clear that he’s experienced. nothing too passionate, of course. there’s a certain air of confidence and the kiss has just the right amount of chasteness to keep you wanting more. 

— as things go on the two of you only get closer. his dates shift from formal outings to extremely casual dates. sometimes it’s buying manga and books together, sometimes it’s watching your favorite movies at home. honda’s favorite ‘date’ consists of you two sitting quietly together in the same room doing completely different things. kiku finds this to be extremely romantic. you’re both doing different things but still enjoying each other’s presence. he’ll be doing paperwork and you’ll be sitting with a computer and neither of you are talking but both of you are happy. during times like this, he may even lean over and kiss you on the cheek, commenting on how much he enjoys your company. 

— he’s not afraid to ask you straight-out what you want for yourself and your future. honda doesn’t want to keep you from your version of happiness, even if that happiness is with another man. there’s no doubt that he wants what’s best for you. 

alfred f. jones!

— he’s a bit thrown off that other men are also trying to romance you. from the very beginning he decides that you’re the one who wants to go steady with. alfred is thrown off, but not enough to give up. he knows his worth. he’s a funny guy, people like that. he’s cute too, smart when he wants to be. jones would ask arthur for help but.. he’d be better off asking a math teacher for help in a history class. he didn’t think kirkland was any good with romantic endeavors. he’d just have to wing it and do his best. it’d be fine.. probably.

— the american doesn’t think of anyone as competition really, but he does hate the idea of you going out with francis. i mean, come on! he’s quite literally known for being a romantic! hopefully you’d find his flirting corny or off putting instead of endearing. alfred’s not completely inept when it comes to romance but he’s no hot shot. most of the time when a flirt of his fails, people laugh it off because he’s just so cute while trying to be a flirty guy. he’s a loser, but an attractive one. people also enjoy the fact that he’s a bit chubby. he knows this only because of past experiences. hmm.. he supposes that ivan could pose an issue too. he’s always an issue in some way or another. 

— his beginning dates are very fun! he’s more fond of going to carnivals, finding a drive in movie theater, stargazing, eating at diners, and dancing together than any modern date. lunch dates are fine and all but it’s just so boring to jones. it’s not that he needs a bunch of excitement but he wants these dates to be interesting. he hopes that after each date ends, he’s still on your mind. he doubts the others are taking you out to such cool places. he’s flirty on these dates, trying his hardest to impress you. he’ll hold your hand often on these dates, as physical contact is something he enjoys a lot. alfred doesn’t mind hugs or kisses this early either, especially if you’re dancing. if you’re not enjoying each other then why even go out? after each date he personally escorts you home. he also leaves you with a kiss to your hand, a sign that he still has some sense of politeness despite his eagerness. 

— as things continue you’ll start to notice that he’s taking you to more distinctive places. instead of finding a drive in movie theater in the middle of nowhere, the american will take you to a roller rink he comes to often. the people there will know him and they’ll know you when he brings you in. apparently he talks about you to whoever will listen. it’s flattering albeit embarrassing. a lot of the places you’ll go will be places he enjoys and wants to share with you. alfred’s much softer now and a bit goofier, backing away from the flirty persona he attempted to put on for the first few dates. you’ll often find yourself leaning onto his shoulder as you try to recollect yourself after breaking down from laughter. it’s in these moments that he’ll smile at you, soaking in your happy expression. it’s a gorgeous expression, one he’d like to see all the time. 

— one day jones realizes that he needs to be seriously dating you. he wanted to take you to an animal adoption center as a sort of surprise but he noticed that doing that was sort of a couple thing.. like a serious couple thing. alfred really thinks getting you a pet would be the best thing in the world. the two of you would make the best pet parents in his mind. it would make him a true hero. or close to one. so he swings by your place and directly asks you if you want to be his partner. he doesn’t stall once he realizes what he needs to do. jones believes that it’s best to just go for what you want. you only live once, after all. 

yao wang!

— it’s not his first time courting a lady. he’s experienced. he even believes that he could outdo francis somewhat. only somewhat though. yao’s been around for a long time so he knows what people like and don’t like. it’s not that he’s a super romantic but he’s passionate no matter what, which draws you in. he suspects you have a thing for older men, which he doesn’t mind playing into. he’s aged like fine wine and he’s not afraid to flaunt it. 

— there is no rivals or competition in wang’s mind. why think about the other guys when he can just focus his attention on you and him? if he had to choose, he’d say arthur, maybe. maybe. francis was too much of a try hard for your affections. kirkland was a mature man. he was polite. the british man seemed to know how to treat someone right. however, in the end, yao viewed himself as on top of it all. he refused to let himself get anxious over your other suitors. that’s how people lose. by worrying.

— he’s a calm and quiet pursuer, playing the long game. beginner dates are very formal. wang tries with all his might to impress you but he makes sure to do so in a way that seems effortless. like he could do this everyday. as if to say, ‘dating me will result in the best treatment for you everyday until death’. he could never say it outright, so he let his actions speak for him. he’s no sugar daddy and he never claims to be anything of the sort. he’s just giving you a taste of what your life could be like should you choose to spend it with him. yao also gives you lots of gifts, though he tries to keep them small so you’re not overwhelmed. he adores the face you make whenever you open up a present he’s gotten you. you’re always so happy to received them.. so graceful when you accept them.. he can’t help but want to spoil you. and that’s exactly what he’ll do, if you continue on.

— as you get closer, wang starts to feel younger. his few grey hairs seem to be jet black again. the dates become less formal and more casual for the both of you. often he’ll just invite you over to his house. he spends less time trying to impress you and more time just enjoying you and your company. you’ll start to hold hands, hug, and kiss a lot more now. he loves the feeling of your lips on his cheek. these dates are a lot more loose and fun, often ending with you two giggling as he holds you in his arms. yao likes to dance with you in his home, rocking back and forth with a smile on his face. he’s shown you what the two sides of your relationship would be like. the first side, what was seen by the public— expensive dinners, beautiful clothing for the both of you, and  lovely gifts— and now, the second side, what wasn’t seen by the public. kisses to the forehead, cooking for each other, reading together, and laughing over nothing in particular. 

— after a while wang will invite you over one day and pop the question. no, not marriage, though he does think you’d make a perfect partner.. he’ll ask if you want to start officially dating. he doesn’t know for sure if you’ll say yes, even though he’s used his tried-and-true method of dating on you. yao hopes for the best and prepares for the worst. he hopes for your love.. but he’s prepared to live life as just a friend of yours. boyfriend or otherwise, he’d like to be present in your life.

[lilac-hecox]

Comedy Club AU:

Ian and Anthony are co-owners of The Giggle Hut and have a regular stable of stand up comics that come to perform. The au centers around the group of comedians.

Shayne: Has been in the scene for a long time, struggling for his big break. He lets himself get anxious about performing and it at times affects his ability to pull off a joke in his set, but he's charismatic enough that he's popular and people like when he does costumed character impressions such as The Chosen.

Trevor: A new comedian on the scene and instantly a lot of comparisons to Shayne for no real reason except they are both blonde men. Trevor is a hit right away and it sets up a rivalry of sorts between them. Shayne feels insecure because Trevor is younger and popular and isn't having to work as hard to gain an audience. Trevor really looks up to and admires Shayne but feels intimidated to say anything because he feels frostiness from Shayne.

Amanda: Always doing sets as different characters, very popular because you never know exactly what character you're getting. She also does a lot of audience interactions and friendly heckling while in character. She is best friends with Shayne and the two often work together and pair well on nights at the club. Amanda is extremely fond of the absurdist comedian Angela.

Angela: Very off the wall absurdist comedy. She's extremely relatable and audiences eat her up. She makes jokes that appeal to almost everyone and always references fellow comedians in her jokes which often kills because she riffs on what the audience is familiar with. She has a big honking crush on Amanda but feels she is out of her league both comedy wise and romantically.

Chanse: MC at the club and often performs mini-sets as musical improv is more his thing, but he does often do some musical comedy at the club, but is also happy to be hosting. Besties with Angela. He also heckles the crowd in a fond but real way. He also uses his sets to throw mini flirtatious jokes at Shayne and Trevor. He has a crush on both of them.

Spencer: Is not at the Hut as much as the other comics, but he performs and kills on the regular. He does a lot of character work and he references the other comedians. Makes an absurd amount of jokes about being gay when he doesn't say one way or another and gives Chanse a shit ton of material to work with in a set devoted to the reasons why Spencer is probably gay.

Tommy: Bartender at the Giggle Hut. He is insanely funny but doesn't think he could perform on stage and Spencer is begging him to try it out. It gets the point where Spencer gets them to set up a mic for Tommy and they banter during one of Spencer's performances and Tommy has the audience crying in laughter.

Pairings/Dynamics:

Shayne/Trevor?? Rivals to lovers type deal?

Shayne/Chanse? Exploration on Shayne's side, maybe happened before he got with Trevor? After? Same time?

Amangela! Two fools who are certain the other doesn't feel the same even though they are obviously crushing on one another.

Spommy: Supportive Spencer and nervous Tommy and mutual respect and flirtation that turns into an actual relationship

Ianthony: BACKGROUND MARRIED CO-OWNER BOSSES OF THE GIGGLE HUT!!!! "our comedian kids are idiots but i love them."

[yestrday]

you've mentioned lumine a few times in academy au drabbles and what-not, but i dont rly know her role 🤔 is she also a yandere (platonic or romantic) to the academy y/n? or is she more so a friend of y/n and helps her brother (and other rivals with the expectation of being paid) with getting closer to y/n

the girls are all part of the harem! lumine and aether are the most popular first years, and a lot of people already look up to thek because of their numerous achievements before and after enrolling to the academy!

they've also got their own charms as well. aether is the gentle, puppy charm who tries to appeal to you with subtle cuteness and trying to help you out whenever you can. (think: aether popping out whenever you're holding too many books or running over to where you are to hold an umbrella over your head)

meanwhile, lumine is more cat-like and reserved. you can feel comfortable knowing that she doesn't hate you, since she's not really outright glaring at you. she relishes in the comfort of silence, but she isn't cheap with her smiles either. (imagine: lumine blankly staring at you till you squirm, before giggling into her palm and wiping away sauce on the corner of your lip. lumine sighing a fond sigh before silently shrugging off her coat and giving it to the soaking wet you).

all the girls have their place in the harem, but boys PLUS girls is a bit too much for me to write and think uo headcanons for at the same time

[shiny-jr]

To the soft yan vil simps, I offer this as tribute so my crops may be blessed and my rolls not shit - we've talked about a darling who continuously tried and failed to confess due to interruptions, but imagine how beyond elated vil would be if they actually succeeded, and not only succeeded, but went the extra mile in making it as romantic as they could

I wonder if he'd appreciate it more if the confession was in private too? Like to him, affirming that his darling cares most about his reaction, and not trying to appeal to a crowd for him, if that makes sense.

Warning: Soft yandere stuff. Gender-neutral reader. Smut? Not really though, just describing smooch scene (can you tell I rarely ever write these kinds of things)?

Characters: Vil Schoenheit.

Summary: Vil finally getting his kiss.

Note: SPEAKING ABOUT SHIT ROLLS. Did y'all know, I hate Cater now? I've literally wished over 120 times on his banner, and he refuses to come home. Apparently everyone else wants to come though. Because in the process of trying to get Halloween Cater, I got my second Halloween Jade, my second SSR Ruggie, my second Halloween Vil, and last night I got my first SSR Azul. Anyways I don't know what came over me but I had the urge to write this.

"Vil... I like you."

There it was. The words he longed to come from your lips, said directly to him. For a moment, he froze. And he never froze. He had expertly handled countless confessions before, all with rejection. And yet here he was, like a deer in the headlights, feeling heat creep up his neck and settle onto his cheeks in the form of a furious blush.

These weren't just any words. Sometimes, an "I like you" could simply be brushed off as something akin to "I enjoy your company" or "I like our current platonic relationship." But this wasn't like that, oh no. You had secluded him purposefully for the sole reason of confessing romantic feelings. It wasn't extravagant, which was fine by him. But your intention was clear, and so were your sincere actions by gifting him a bouquet of dark red roses which you must've picked yourself from the botanical garden, judging by the condition of the blossoms.

Of course, he could've sped up this process by confessing to you himself once he realized you liked him romantically. He realized a few weeks ago. But, he was much too prideful to immediately give in. But he was desperate for your love, so if he had have to wait any longer, well, he just might've gone through with his own confession to you out of desperation.

It took so long to get here though. He had to busy Rook and Epel with tasks so they didn't disturb the moment, make sure everything was just right, but also besides that. He had done so much before this event. Vil allowed Rook to frighten anyone who dared look at you oddly. The dorm leader made sure that all potential rivals stayed away, and he had his loyal huntsman and other discreet options of how to deal with them.

It was a good thing he was seated when you confessed, because his knees felt weak now. If he were standing, he most certainly would've risked toppling over like the first time he wore heels. His heart was beating erratically, and for once he was speechless. His throat felt dry as he gazed down at you, you nervously awaiting a response. Vil had it all planned out in his head. He would elegantly accept your confession, perhaps you'd embrace, and he'd invite you out to dinner. Well, that elegant acceptance was now out the window. He was so shocked, so elated, he knew this confession would happen but still, he couldn't get over it.

A desperate man acts on his needs, and so he did. You noticed the slightest tears appearing in his eyes as he gave out a breathy laugh of disbelief between a joyful smile. The next thing you knew, he practically flung himself at you, his upper body leaning over yours as he shifted in his seat on the wooden bench beside you. In an instant, his lips were on yours. They were soft, sweet, which was probably to be expected. Vil intensified the kiss, his body inching closer to yours so he was practically right up against you. It was as if he were dying, and you were his cure he needed. He tilted his head to angle the kiss just right, while one of his hands rubbed circles on your back, but it was firm enough to keep you in place extremely close to him. His other hand held your cheek, keeping your face in place.

You were beginning to get breathless, in need of oxygen. Vil, as much as he wished to continue, began to need air as well. That's when he pulled away, but you didn't even have enough time to say a word when he dove right back in for another kiss. And a third. And a fourth. And a fifth.

By the time it was over, you were completely dazed and stunned beyond words. There must be red lipsticks stains all over your mouth. Maybe your hair was a bit of a messy because by the third kiss he moved one of his hands to the top of your head, where his fingers played with your hair and his nails carefully scratched your scalp so it sent a shiver down your spine. Not to mention the intense heat caught in your cheeks. Vil finally stopped, but he stayed incredibly close.

The hand that had been on your back, was now on the bench, his fingers just over yours. And that hand that had been cupping your cheek, moved to your chin to tilt your head upwards.

Vil had an intense and pretty blush on his face, his lipstick smeared just a tiny bit. Miraculously, none of the makeup around his eyes had been messed up by the small amount of tears he shed moments ago. He smiled softly, enchanting eyes gazing at you with such obsessive love, as he murmured, "I've waited so long to do that."

[devine-fem]

As someone who likes Damijon as both platonic and romantic…I don’t understand the obsession of certain antis bring up whole age gap thing when it comes to Damian and Jon. It’s getting really old and pissing me off at this point.

I can’t recall a fandom I’ve been in where antis kept bringing up an age gap between two characters.

Idk if I’m talking out of my ass but it sounds like as if antis think the fandom puts Damijon in sexual situations 24/7 when that’s not the case.

Jfc no one is forcing you to ship them if you don’t (it’s not even canon!) but don’t go around accusing the fandom as p*d*s just to make a point. ( I know in fandoms there some weirdos too but it doesn’t make up a whole)

Let the Damijon fandom enjoy whatever crumbles they are getting right now…because it’s really just crumbles at this point.

If those antis also consist of those who are our rival ships (they know who they are) like yall are getting canon content rn from DC if you’re upset with the quality of it speak with your wallet idk…???

Sorry for the rant it’s just for the most part Damijon fandom has been pretty chill (excluding Twitter that’s another can of worms) and I hate the accusations parts of the fandom love to make.

Yeah… people don’t talk about how Jon had to be 11 to Damian’s 13 before he left for space because they only read super sons, they never really look at any other source or think about their ages as more than that because tom taylor said out his mouth that they were 3 years apart when dissing the ship BUT he admits himself to not know their exact ages and that it could be a 2 year age gap.

So I just think of it as two years, and with two years I don’t really care because personally even in my youth I’ve been with people who are two years older with no issue because age alone doesn’t determine whether or not someone is taking advantage of you for obvious reasons. Age gaps are not tangible things, to some people what you consider weird is normal to someone else.

Then there’s the fact that neither Jon or Damian have birthdays. Damian was aged up for teen titans which people don’t seem to care about. Among other things like how Jon and Damian are the same age in most other universes… did you know that? Also, people like to say theres a maturity gap but forget that Damian was the immature one that picked fights. Plus, when characters grow up beside each other then it’s less ‘weird’ cause then they are expierencing similar traumas. It’s probably lots smaller then we think.

When I talk about them with a three year age gap then its probably platonic but sometimes romantic, two years then its sometimes platonic or romantic, one year, platonic or romantic and I stay between these because their age can slightly change their dynamic. It’s for fun, its exploring their platonic dynamic if it had elements of romance to it. Its interchangeable to me but for the most parts its two.

They are barbies that I play with at my own free will. They are not real people, they may imitate life but they do not infact replicate it.

So yeah… when they are young I only ever have really seen or interacted with media where J and D have not done more than maybe peck. Its just supposed to be cute and sweet.

Do people not understand the concept of the fact Jon and Damian should not be getting into a serious relationship while they are young or else it would go horribly wrong? Do they not understand that a lot of the ships appeal in the childhood friends TO lovers factor?

It kind of bothers me to be having to put the fact that I l hate Jonjay and like Daminika in my bio so people can get a feel for the type of person I am. And “rival” ships? there’s no rivalry, I don’t feel threatened by other peoples ships at all… especially if they’re canon… unless its like jonjay where the origin of the ship is inherently problematic, substanceless and built on character assassination… but we hate damijon and praise THAT? We say that damijon is worse than that? I’m sorry but jonjay to jon kent is jayroy to roy harper to me.

Twitter is very strange, very very strange people on that app to which this morning I had to uninstall because I KNEW that they would feel threatened by damijons today and hate profusely in response to it.

Although, you guys gotta put that age gap shit to bed…

Dami look 14 here to you? If Damijons are the ones who don’t read comics then how do we know that they are well in their 20s and 30s here. They are both consenting adults in main continuity that can do as they please here. You simply cannot say anything. No arguement can be supported now because now, there is absolutely nothing wrong with it.

There was no point in hate the age gap really in the first place since time was always gonna heal it anyway???

But part of me kind of understands hating it if you experience fandom through twitter which is not a fandom app at all. Damijon stans are annoying and gross on twitter, I get it but not everyone is inherently horrible for obvious reasons.

[salemcantupdate]

So this is my updated shipping and favorites perspective, given my prior one I no longer agree with.

First things first, I believe in big polycule ship, everyone is together and dating. (Sobs in that’s not the case).

But! My favorite ships that isn’t just massive polycule (preface I am a multishipper):

Gale and Astarion, aka, Bloodweave. Listen, it’s all big now, we all know about it. Opposites but the same, walking the same path, they can make each other so much worse or so much better. Hubris vs self preservation, both essentially having the possibility to become a god. Both have been beaten down and belittled by beings far more powerful than them, one knowing the abuse and the other not. Also the manipulative hatefuck to love would be incredible.

Lae’zel and Shadowheart, aka Silverheart. Classic enemies to rivals to lovers. Both have been mislead and brainwashed by evil female goddesses that demanded total obedience, that both people completely dedicated themselves to until they realized everything they knew was a lie. Whats more romantic than fighting and getting bloody and then fighting over who tops?

Wyll and Karlach, (I don’t know their ship name, may I suggest Devilbound?) is one that I’m still kinda iffy about honestly. I’m not sure if I can see them as explicitly dating, but I can see them being best buddies who fuck sometimes. I can see them making a deal like “If neither of us are married in a decade let’s just marry each other.” Like they aren’t actively in love or awed by each other but there is deep respect and they would fight and die for each other. And I also headcanon that if you romance Karlach and then go to Avernus with her, Wyll HAS to join and it’s gone be a weird little polycule thing I don’t CARE.

So, another thing. I really really like a threesome of Karlach, Lae’zel, and Shadowheart. The Ladies. But like, Lae’zel and Shadowheart both immediately love Karlach. Lae’zel being like “You WILL respect her” and Shadowheart like “She could carry me to safety.” Are they not blatantly simping??? Like I think they would hatefuck and then stare at Karlach and be like “We need her too.” Two scary women and then the golden retriever girlfriend.

Wyll and Astarion isn’t one that really calls to me, though I get the appeal. Monster and monster hunter, Wyll being the hero that Astarion always dreamed of saving him so long ago. So on and so forth. I just prefer a Redeemed Durge playing that role for Astarion?? But I definitely get the appeal.

Wyll and Gale, I haven’t seen anything for. I don’t know if anyone ships them. But listen, these two would try and one up each other in wowing and wooing the other, Gale with the weave and Wyll with the stories of old. Imagine Wyll trying to get old and out-of-shape Gale to dance in his physical body. They are both 100% into worshipping their partner, so them worshipping each other would just be so cute to me.

Now, this one really surprised me. But I really like Karlach and Astarion??? Like, cause, OK. If you romance Astarion as Karlach, you can’t actually have sex with him in his first romance scene cause it’ll burn him. This causes Astarion to panic, immediately forced him out of his comfort zone, and also ensures a route in which you never have to have sex with Astarion??? Which I know I wish I could do in a normal route! So lowkey adore those two. Also, they’re literally black cat and golden retriever??? Someone who literally went through Hell and lost all bodily autonomy for so long but still laughs and smiles and has so much hope compared to someone who was beaten to hopelessness. It’s cute! But I also ship this in specifically the asexual way. They kiss and cuddle and bump heads and are adorable, but I can’t really see them having sex. That’s just me though haha.

Durge and Gortash obviously fucked and were so in love with each other in such a horrible twisted way. If Gortash ordered it, Durge would stay their hand. Durge prayed for forgiveness, begged for it, promised, swore, vowed that he would still kill everyone, kill all. But he was in love, he was obsessed, and Gortash may have been able to pull Durge from Bhaal’s grasp, only for Gortash himself to fall to the depths of depravity. I need more fucked up fics for these, with all the gore dirt and blood. I want it to be like the movie Hellraiser.

Durge and Astarion is by far my favorite for “canon” routes. It’s just, Astarion doesn’t feel like he’s a damsel in distress being saved, he doesn’t want that. He wants to be your equal, he wants to help you, and as Durge you are able to save each other from the hunger, from the urge, from the “monster”, from the Father. Both were created to be a tool, to be used, for a singular purpose to serve. And both break free, and then have the choice. Shall they become what they were made to be? What they are destined to be? Or take a shit on destiny and be truly happy?

Now for bear-daddy Halsin. He’s more difficult, as his story isn’t fully explored in the plot of the game and he was mostly added as a proper companion because he was so popular. Which I’m extremely happy about cause I fucking love him. But! Due to this, it’s hard for me to ship him with anyone. I’ve seen some people argue for Kagha or Rath, but I personally disagree. I do like Astarion and him, or a poly with him, Astarion, and Redeemed Durge. Fighting the “beast within” and all that, Halsin in the more metaphorical sense. BUT, let me offer something up as an idea, a concept if you will. Gale and Halsin. NOW, now, let me explain. This isn’t JUST them being my two favorite romance options and me being sad I can’t be with them both. But! Both were young men suddenly thrust upon with a massive amount of responsibility and faith put in them; Halsin becoming a commander and archdruid as an apprentice during the war against Ketheric, Gale with being chosen by Mystra, taught by her, and then becoming her romantic partner. A literal goddess. And I’m one of the people who headcanon that their interactions started when Gale was a teenager. Gale both believes he is the best and deserves to die, Halsin has never once believed in his ability to lead. Also Halsin explicitly notes he will miss the library at the grove, and GUESS WHAT GALE HAS? A library. But like, imagine Gale making a magic teleportation circle thing that goes from his tower to the middle of the forest with a little cabin that Halsin lives in and they can easily travel and visit each other and fbskfhwkfjw. Also, both of them having weird sex scenes (that I absolutely adore). Gale with astral projection and Halsin with bear. I bet Gale is one of the few companions who’d be like “Oh you’re a bear? Chill, not the weirdest sexual experience I’ve had.” Halsin would also smile and nod along and sip tea and Gale goes on his long long rant and then— gah it could be so cute. Cottagecore meets academia. I’m gonna call their ship name CottageAcademia. I will take criticism on that name. I’m dumb.

Speaking of, if I failed to mention, Halsin and Gale are my absolute favorite romance options. Gale makes me giddy every single play through and I break my heart every time I have to say no to him for a different romance (like Astarion). He’s just… I find him so charming and cute and I love him and I GAJDHAKSHQK.

Anyways, npc involved ships. (Also I can’t say anything about Minthara cause I literally don’t know her, never played evil route)

Karlach and Dammon is cute, but, eh? I don’t get much from it personally. I think Karlach and Alfira would be cuter.

A fucked up ship that I like is Astarion and Raphael. It… yes, I know, it’s terrible, it’s abusive. But it’s juicy, it’s delicious, the best of the poisoned apples. There’s a fic on AO3 that’s just fantastic even though it’s only got two chapters so far, it’s called Palmarosa by thespectaclesofthor

… The Emperor and Gale. LISTEEENNN, it’s just, Gale is the only one ok with mindflayer Tav. And like, Emperor is smart. It’d be funny. Come on.

Another fun fucked up ship that I haven’t seen much of, Minthara and Orin the Red. It’s bad, it’s terrible, it’s so fucked up, but I like it.

Barcus and Wulbren, no, I don’t think it’s healthy. But Barcus clearly loves Wulbren so damned much and I just want the poor stupid gnome to be happy godsdammit all.

Apikusis and Kagha. So, I don’t know if anyone else has spoken to the Druid Apikusis, but she is one of the few druids who is desperately against the rite. And when I spoke to her after, she said she saw the old Kagha in the woman, was desperate that what she saw was true. What if they were girlfriends? Then Kagha fell to the shadow druids, and now that they’re back they can fall back into love? I just see so much possibility in them!

Olly and Rugan got down and dirty after barely surviving the gnolls and I’ll put money on that.

Omeluum and Blurg, they just seem like science husbands. They’re married and I refuse to take criticism on this.

That’s all I can really think of, but for characters I’m just absolutely obsessed with: He Who Was and Abdirak are my favorite npc’s. Gale and Halsin are my favorite companions.

Now, my personal opinion on class/race Tav/Durge romance for each character.

Shadowheart: Selune Cleric for obvious reasons, race I don’t think super matters. But I do like Durge, connect on amnesia. Just figure out how cleric and a Durge works haha.

Lae’zel: Githyanki who defected from the gith and has been living peacefully in hiding until recently (so a class that gives peaceful options) Tav

Astarion: Redeemed Durge, any race any class. I’m personally doing a Drow Spore Druid. But a paladin or cleric could also be super cute.

Gale: Wild Sorcerer / Bard, and I personally prefer gnome? But any race is still fine. Also Tav or Durge work fine to me, he’s gonna be a big simp. Though, I do personally like the idea of you becoming the mindflayer in this route. He would use magic to disguise you and it’d be cute

Wyll: Tiefling Bard… I know it’s the first that’s so specific but come on. He becomes a devil, he loves stories of old, y’all dance together. I think it’s cute. I also prefer Tav here, I just can’t see a circumstance where he looks past the murder of Alfira to romance a Durge.

Karlach: Honestly she’s the one I’m least sure over, other than I like being smaller for her. I also like the idea of a paladin / bard for her?

Halsin: Literally anyone and anything as long as you’re down to fuck a bear.

These are all just my own opinion, added it cause I know sometimes I wanna see what other people think is the best “romance route” for a character.

But that’s the closing! These perspectives might change again, but for now this is my thoughts on everything shipping and romance related (that isn’t explicitly canon).

[department-of-landing-strategies]

Quick thoughts on two person ships that I've seen in the fics I like or read fics for in both HP and RWBY

Percy x Penelope: I like it it's cute. Ginny catching them snogging would probably have a greater impact on canon if Penny was someone the Weasleys had a vocal opinion of.

Percy x Audrey: It's cute in fanfic. In canon though, it suffers from the thing of canon Audrey is just a name.

Percy x Oliver: This fits into so many of my favourite tropes, it's kind of hilarious. I think this was my first Percy ship.

Percy x Marcus: Character I love shipped with a charater that absolutely would go to hell and back for the other is probably the quickest way to get me to ship two characters and Flintley isn't any different. This is my favourite Percy, hands down

Percy x Anyone in Harry's year or Ginny's year: Not getting into specific ships because this is the most common theme of Percy ships that I end up filtering out. Personally, I only see it happening post second wizarding war after both members have left Hogwarts, and I have to be in a really specific mood to read fics for these types of ships. However, depending on who Percy is shipped with, it can be cute

Penelope x Audrey: I love these two together in fanfic and I love the versatility. If you thought Perciver fit a lot of tropes, then this ship can fit more because again canon Audrey is just a name.

Penelope x Fred: I think my enjoyment of this ship heavily depends on how Fred is characterized. These two in a ship read to me as Bookworm x Prankster, and I'm really not a fan of that trope. It absolutely doesn't help that the twins are tied for my least favourite (I don't hate them but I like the other siblings better) of the book series Wesley children.

Oliver x Marcus: I like the ship, and I think it's a good rivals to lovers ship. I'm pretty sure the only reason I've dropped a FlintWood fic is because I didn't vibe with the non-Flintwood ships in the fic

Ruby x Weiss: White Rose I think is partly as popular as it is because of the thing of pair off the spares. However, unlike a lot of couples I've seen with that thing, their canon interactions are. On the other hand, their canon status of getting partnered during initiation does help their cause.

Ruby x Blake: I know I've said it for basically most of the other ships on the list but it's cute. I think I got into this ship with either a Team RWBY poly fic or a Beauty and the Beast retelling that used Ladybug

Ruby x Jaune: I like their friendship and I think a romantic relationship would be fine. I don't really ship it myself but I can see the appeal.

Weiss x Blake: I like it. However, I think it would be better in the later seasons rather than when they were in Beacon.

Weiss x Yang: Freezerburn, my beloved. I know with recent events, it's absolutely not going to be canon, but imma just vibe with their dynamic with fanfic

Weiss x Pyrrha: I think this is my favourite Weiss ship. There's a possibility of one-sided rivalry to lovers while in Beacon, and I think that's my favourite trope the ship could fall into

Weiss x Jaune: Personally prefer a friendship between the two but the volume 9 white knight moments were cute

Blake x Yang: It's cute. I'm glad they got made canon, and I want to see more cute canon moments between the two if the show does somehow get another volume. In the meantime, I will be chilling with fanfic.

Blake x Sun: Like Bumblebee, its cute. I also don't want to see discourse between it and Bumblebee.

Blake x Adam: The exception to my Blake ships that I've read are cute. The stuff I've read have sometimes had this as a past relationship for Blake and it should stay a past relationship.

Yang x Neo: Would be an interesting friendship post s3 but I don't feel comfortable shipping them romantically with recent canon events even with the Neo age discourse I've seen.

[frienderbee]

I NEED MORE APRIL DONNIE AND CASEY PLATONIC FRIEND BUDDY PAL MOMENTS.

LIKE. IMAGINE HOW CHAOTIC THAT TRIO WOULD BE ONCE THEY GOT OVER THEIR FEELINGS.

Donnie and Casey no longer try too hard to appeal to April and suddenly all 3 of them are arguing and insulting one another

It's a lot more lighthearted than the initial arguments between Casey and Donnie but they're all closer so it's suddenly a lot more personal

They are a seriously chaotic trio. Should not be left alone together

April and Donnie are best friends

They are talking shit about you

Casey and Donnie are dating cause caseytello propaganda BABEY

I know I said platonic and then unplatoniced your rivals but I can't picture them as just friends, like either they're trying kill eachother or they're cuddling and shit

Why not both actually

Somehow April has become the permanent 3rd wheel but like they're all cool with it-

Everyone at school thinks her and Casey are dating but neither of them really mind

Donnie likes playing with and styling both the humans hair

April had to put up with Donnie and Casey pining over one another for so long she started wondering if they were somehow more bearable when it was was her they were pining over

April is not interested in relationships at all so her third wheeling constantly is perfect for her, she feels bad sometimes but they assure her they don't mind

Donnie and April study together and she keeps him up to date on all her lessons as it's the closest he can get to experiencing school

Donnie also starts helping tutor Casey sometimes but he rarely stays focused long enough

April and Casey both have a habit of hanging out in the lab when Donnies working for various reasons

Because of this he has an emergency "no humans allowed " sign for when he needs to focus... or when he wants to annoy Casey

Casey and April are already pretty close due to being eachothers only "normal"/school friend

Casey is still a flirt to both of them but makes sure not to overstep with April

It took a while for them to all get so close after April finally sat them down and admitted she doesn't see them romantically but once they started hanging out all together they became inseparable

After a while they all started joking about it every now and then

Donnie and April have sleepovers at her apartment where they watch films together (they both nitpick and point out mistakes as they do)

I'm half asleep and it's 2am I'm out of thoughts but ragghhhhh I miss these three. They're so silly /pos

[fumifooms]

Fleki x Marcille

I dub thee flekille Fourth entry of my “Dunmeshi rarepairs I will birth with my own hands if I have to” series. This one goes really well alongside laicion

Hear me out… Probably one of my most crackpair simply because they never really interact in canon, but it snowballed from me thinking about laicion so many months ago and I genuinely enjoy them a lot on their own now too.

Overview of the appeal: Silly prep girl that tries to not be silly x silly troublemaker that is silly on purpose. Could have been cellmates in another life 😍 /j It’s chaos x order, it’s propriety x will tease you specifically to make you uncomfortable, it’s Fleki sticking around Marcille when she gets the opportunity to because she thinks she’s entertaining, it’s her dragging Marcille to a shitty club that would give anyone epileptic a seizure and Marcille being so out of her depth but finding the thrill intriguing… It’s Fleki’s YOLO attitude rubbing on Marcille a bit, encouraging her to stress less and live more, it’s Marcille looking out for Fleki and teaching her to value her health, her friends and stability in life more. It’s banter, where Fleki is bold and amused and Marcille is panicked and horrified, which as they grow to know each other becomes Fleki teasing and Marcille responds with exasperated but fond comebacks. They have big yuri manga with a bad boy girl vibes, they deserve 50k slow burn rivals to lovers fics exploring the deepest emotional lows imaginable, they deserve cute funny bantery ficlets where they try out rollerskating together and Fleki skates face first into a pole and Marcille heals her up. ALSO it’s the mage who always talks about the importance of hair and braids hers neatly x the mage who keeps her hair long but at MOST brushes it every 3 days and looks feral

We see that Fleki looooves casual physical contact which I think suits Marcille well! Since she’s also big on casual & affectionate physical touches. Oversimplifying it, I kinda see Fleki as a more chaotic and less grumpy Izutsumi, which I think pairs really well with Marcille.

Ok, so the meme + below is my romantic flekille & laicion, qpr laimar & flekion vision… Maybe romantic laimar and flekion too idfc. Fleki’s bestie Lycion and Lycion’s boyfriend Laios and Laios’ girlfriend Marcille and Marcille’s girlfriend Fleki… A bond forged by the shared experience of having a feral partner. In my timeline they start hanging out because laicion starts dating and it goes from there, like they keep showing up at the other’s place to come pick their guy up or when laicion meet up in town at an agreed location both come with their bestie so then as Laios and Lycion head off the girlies just stand there awkwardly for a sec together… And it becomes habit enough that they start talking. One time one arrives early at the other’s place to pick up their dog guy so while she waits on Laios and Lycion being done hanging out they just chat and hit it off around the kitchen table. Eventually maybe they all live together, the girls have a qpr situationship with their respective dog boy too and they all snuggle up together on the couch and life is good… I have a couple of other flekille au ideas though.

The one college au I would EAT UP FR. Anything modern for them is so fun for some reason. They could even have a like… y’know ‘that yuri manga where the prep girl thinks the emo girl’s a boy and she’s interested’ thing (googling it The guy she was interested in wasn’t a guy at all is the name), they feel like they’d have that energy… Except that instead of Fleki being dressed all cool she’s dressed in Minions merch or something. Puke colored tie dye. Marcille cringes but also smth about the cringefail allure has her enraptured (jk it’s mostly Fleki being determinedly clingy) Like come on imagine Fleki with the alpaca trampoline hand tattoo, Marcille would be so endeared. They have the vibes ever, I wanna see them hang out and with Lycion and Laios too

Marcille, seeing this disheveled absolute rascal: … I can fix her.

I made a reblog post that goes into Fleki’s drug addiction a lil for the topic of the ship just so it’s easily avoidable if it’s an uncomfortable topic to some, I don’t go into the details though, just on how it might affect their relationship

[punkeropercyjackson]

Also b4 i forget to post this,Gwen and Hobie's dynamic is,in fact,canonically romantic.I love Siblings!Ghost Punk so much but literally nobody on the crew's ever said they're familial or took back Hobie being Miles' romantic rival so textually with Miles' jealousy at their interactions and nobody in-universe saying Gwobie's not a thing they're an unofficial couple.If you see them as strictly platonic due to personal experience then that's totally okay and it's very valid to hate the ship for being yet another case of black boy x white girl but i love Ghostpunk as a t4t romance from personal experience too and you can't be complaining about it if you ship both Ghostflower and Ghostprowler due to your misterpretation that Gwen and Miles are wanted together by the universe rather than defying canon to be together because that implies Miles could only ever truly love white girls and that's far more snowbunny than Hobie falling for a girl who just happens to be white(and mind you,nobody is stopping you from just making Gwen black like i do since i want her to be and Miles said to do my own thing like he does).Queerplatonic relathionships can have romantic tones to them because 'qpp' means 'outside of relathionship norms',not just 'super special strictly platonic bond'.This goes for relathionship anarchy too and Hobie's a canon anarchist and Gwen's a canon trans girl so she inherently exists outside of cisheteronormativity.You can dress up your antiblackness and transmisogyny in fancy language all you want but you're still calling Hobie a predator by implying he's 'taking advantage of Gwen when she's in a really vulnerable place' as if they aren't fucking friends and i'm giving you extra bombastic sideeyes for never saying the same for Miles even though he openly flirted with Gwen the whole movie and instantly got jealous when she just MENTIONED having a guy friend and it would be peak dumbassery of me to call him a bad person for it just like y'all do with Hobie but y'all can get away with it cause Hobie's darker than Miles and punk and therefore 'a threat' and 'not the soft sweet reliable romantic type'.It's also super gross that you guys refuse to let a transfem be loved and seen as appealing without objectification(see the Gwobie hook up allegations that aren't even by actual shippers and the 'Are these your drawings?' meme),especially when she repetadly expresses wanting to because of her insecurities,bad parental situation and social isolation.Google what 'intersectionality' means,i think it'll be a big help and help you not be one of the most annoying mfs on the planet

[plantboiart]

I love looking too deeply into things that were clearly meant to be jokes and not serious in any shape or form. Today on the list: Kian’s relationship with Donna. Under the cut to avoid filling people’s feeds

Now I think most people will agree that Kian’s relationship with his own parents probably wasn’t great. I mean I’m just saying if my parents didn’t give me a last name I probably would just assume they didn’t want me or something. It’s one thing to support your child if they want to change their name but it’s a whole different thing to not even give them the choice to keep the name you gave them.

Now this plays pretty interestingly with Donna considering the fact that she’s without a doubt the best parent we see in the campaign. And we don’t know exactly how old Kian was when he and the others became friends, my personal headcanon is like 12-13, but if you have a child and they make a new friend who’s parents are probably known to be in a cult and also hippies and also didn’t bother naming their child? I’d grab that child so fucking fast and try to treat them as my own. Show them some love and support they wouldn’t get from their own parents.

And so like I find it extremely reasonable to assume that when they were younger Donna probably would have been very caring towards Kian (and obviously Rolan as well but this post isn’t about him). And I find it pretty reasonable to assume that if Kian’s parents were neglectful he would probably have just clung onto that care from an adult because he just needed some fucking paternal support.

But the thing is. I find it very easy to headcanon Kian with some major abandoment issues that honestly even rival Rand’s. Because I mean Rolan left them, Becky left him and he waited for her for fifteen fucking years, we can assume Rand wasn’t exactly emotionally available because he had his own issues (can’t really blame him for that but still), his parents were probably shit, and judging by the fact that Kian is very clearly a huge romantic who literally waited for his high school girlfriend for fifteen years, and yet in his introduction it’s made extremely clear that he doesn’t seem to do like serious relationships anymore? My guess would be that he had a lot failed relationships in his like early twenties and when none of them worked out he eventually just gave up and settled for one night stands.

Now this works alongside something else that is of course very notable about Kian: his looks. Like we don’t know their stats exactly I don’t think but he is canonically extremely attractive and probably has his highest characteristic in appearance. Because he’s a grizzly character. Of course he does (/lh).

But I find it very reasonable to assume that if someone had pretty bad abandonment issues and was extremely attractive and aware of that, it would become very easy for them to assume that people could only want them or care about them for their looks. And if we assume that, we can probably also assume that they would heavily lean into that and use their looks to get even some kind of affection and care from others even if it’s extremely surface level.

And bringing this back to Donna: if we assume that all my reachings in this post are correct (they are not, i am looking too deep into things because it is my favorite hobby) then it really just puts Kian’s relationship with Donna into an entirely new and way sadder light. Because suddenly it’s not just an extremely flirty person flirting with his friend’s mom for fun, but instead someone who’s been lacking any kind of paternal affection for his entire life trying to make himself sexually appealing to the one person he might have received it from because at least that way she’d care for him on some level.

And the thing is I don’t know if Kian would even be like… aware that’s what he’s doing. Or if he’d really just removed any possibility for platonic or familial love from his own life that he couldn’t even recognise that that’s what he really wants.

And maybe it’s even worse that it works. That Donna is attracted to him. That he can get that affection and love from her, someone who probably knew him as a kid, who might have practically raised him, and wouldn’t that just make him even more sure that he’s right? That the only way anyone could ever truly love and care for him is if he makes himself sexually appealing to them?

(Sorry for long post. I am. Thinking about him every second of every minute of every hour of every day of every week of every month of every-)