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kaylorrehabcenter · 4 years

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Rating Every Song on Fearless Based on How Gay it is

Hello friends! I still have a few song analyses in the pipeline (and one on Lover the album) but today in honor of Fearless (Taylor’s Edition) being announced and Love Story being released in a few hours I thought I’d do something fun to celebrate!

And you know what? Fuck my usual disclaimer, I am the word of god here. Try and change my mind about any of these. I dare you. (I kid I kid this isn’t that serious and you’re free to disagree <3)

1. Fearless 15/10

Everything about this song is so fucking gay oh my god. This isn’t a fruit, this is a whole ass edible arrangement. As a small rural town Gay (my hometown has a population of less that 4,000 and where I’m living now has a population of 2,500) this uh. Hits.

“And I don't know how it gets better than this/You take my hand and drag me head first, fearless”

Y’ALL

The idea of falling in love with someone who makes you less afraid of your homophobic small town…….it’s getting to me.

“My hands shake, I'm not usually this way but/You pull me in and I'm a little more brave/It's the first kiss, it's flawless, really something/It's fearless”

This is making me emotional, I'll be honest. I see so much of my friends and my experience in high school in this song.

This quote I found on genius is from when the album was released on BMR’s website.

“When I wrote ‘Fearless,’ I wasn’t dating anyone. I wasn’t even in the beginning stages of dating anybody. I really was all by myself out on tour and I got this idea for a song about the best first date. I think sometimes when you’re writing love songs, you don’t write them about what you’re going through at the moment, you write about what you wish you had. So, this song is about the best first date I haven’t had yet.”

This just screams baby Tay writing gay folklore to me, about the gay stories she wish she had. Notice how there are no pronouns in this song??? Fruity I’m telling you.

All that to say. I’m crying because the linear note says “I loved you before I met you” and I want to go listen to Long Story Short and cry now.

2. Fifteen 1/10

Objectively pretty straight as she’s singing about her and Abigail’s dating boys in HS. And Taylor got with a senior guy. Good for her I suppose.

Unless he was one of the shitty ones in which case.

“This is life before you know who you're gonna be”

This however, is a cute line and the whole song makes me warm and nostalgic. You can also hear her crying after the line “and Abigail gave everything she had to a boy who changed his mind” which makes me emo and I’m sure will take on new depth after Abigail’s divorce and hurt me even more.

Other highlights that make me sob include.

“When all you wanted was to be wanted/Wish you could go back and tell yourself what you know now/Back then I swore I was gonna marry him someday/But I realized some bigger dreams of mine”

Bigger dreams of hers indeed :’)

(Also how can you say she’s a gold star lesbian when this song exists. She was obviously dating boys in high school and even if you think she’s a lesbian. Comp het is a hell of a drug kids.)

3. Love Story 8/10

Tried to change the ending indeed.

This is THE Taylor Swift song, and maybe it’s the nostalgia talking but damn I still love it. Written because she wanted to change the ending of Romeo and Juliet (how anyone likes RandJ enough to want to rewrite I have no clue.) and/or because her parents didn’t approve of a guy she was seeing. (according to genius, it would’ve been too early for Joe J so it could possibly be Boys Like Girls frontman, his image did clash with hers and they did release some cute songs together. However if you want my take it’s probably folklore about Emily, take for what you will)

This song has very oft gay vibes with the ‘They don’t approve of our love angle!’ but uses male pronouns so points redacted for that. HOWEVER this is a very early use of ~the male perspective~ in Taylor’s songs and for that it deserves all the love.

“ So I sneak out to the garden to see you/We keep quiet, 'cause we're dead if they knew/So close your eyes/Escape this town for a little while”

More rural town angst!!!

Nothing gets me more than rural town angst.

“Romeo, save me, they're trying to tell me how to feel/This love is difficult, but it's real”

Originally the lyric was “this love is different”. Granted I do not remember the source, i’s just lore implanted into my brain, but make of that what you will.

“"Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone/I love you, and that's all I really know/I talked to your dad, go pick out a white dress/It's a love story, baby, just say "Yes"”

Marry me Juliet from the male perspective :)

Also worth noting. This is Karlie’s (and Kim K’s lmao) favorite Taylor song which. While basic as hell. Makes this cover sad as hell to this former Kaylor. (thanks @swiftgron-get-married for the tears <3)

Also not to make this about a man AGAIN but the secret message is “Some day I’ll find this” AND SHE DID IM CRYING.

4. Hey Stephen 1/10

The one thing Camilla Cabello and I have in common is loving this song, so I have to live with that for the rest of my life.

This song is very painfully straight.

How can you think this woman is a gold star lesbian.

The only noteworthy thing is that this is one of the few songs she confirms who it’s about. The secret message is “Love and Theft” which is the name of a country music duo who went on to open her Fearless tour. Which, does make me side eye this song a little bit.

Still a cute song.

“Hey Stephen, boy, you might have me believing/I don't always have to be alone”

5. White Horse 1/10

Oh look. It’s track five.

You know maybe this is just me being a bitch but in my ranking of track fives this is. Pretty low. Maybe on the bottom.

Like I don’t have a lot to say about it.

She’s going through it over a guy. He was a cheating dickweazel.

“'Cause I'm not your princess, this ain't a fairytale/I'm gonna find someone someday/Who might actually treat me well”

“Try and catch me now, oh/It's too late/To catch me now”

These lines hit though!!

And she found Joe!! Who treats her well!!!! And she isn’t the princess, she’s the prince who dropped her sword and knocked on her door!!! But this time if they come for them she’s ready!!!

Yes I will make every song about Long Story Short <3

6. You Belong With Me 5/10

Ah yes. The other THE Taylor Swift song.

You know. If I went to a high school with a cheerleading squad. And I had a crush on a cheerleader. I would blast this song. So for that it gets a 5/10. Otherwise. Fairly straight and fairly iconic.

7. Breathe 8/10

Well. We know this one is about a woman. (Emily Poe for those not in the know. Ha. A rhyme!) That alone has an 8/10. And it’s the first time she has a featured artist so bonus points for that!

It was nominated for a Grammy and it fucking lost to Jason Mraz. When’s the last time you thought about Jason Mraz.

I will not have Kaylor feels on a fucking Fearless song but damn is it VERY easy.

“Never a clean break, no one here to save me/You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand”

“It's 2 A.M, feeling like I just lost a friend/Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me”

Also this bridge? Goes off. HIGHLY underrated.

8. Tell Me Why 3/10

You know. Maybe this album isn’t as gay as I once thought.

This song does bop though, not as good as her other angry songs on this album. But I can vibe with this you know. Why are you being an asshole mysterious man.

“You could write a book on how to ruin someone's perfect day”

This has to be one of baby Tay’s best burns. Damn.

“Why do you have to make me feel small/So you can feel whole inside?/Why do you have to put down my dreams/So you're the only thing on my mind?”

Men ain’t shit kids. However, bonus points for the shade.

9. You’re not Sorry 1/10

Ok, ok. Maybe this was a foolish endeavor.

Because yet again we have a very straight song. A good song. That was on Taylor’s episode of CSI. But oh dear. Very straight. Gets a measly one point. We started this post off so very very gay but damn. We seem to be nearing the end on a very straight note.

10. The Way I Loved You 20/10

Hey Remember what I said about this album being very straight.

WELL THAT WAS A LIE.

Is this a comphet album or am I projecting.

This is one of my favorite baby gay Taylor songs. Her masterful use of pronouns (he is sensible! And so incredible! And all my single friends are jealous! But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain, when it was two am and I was cursing your name!) makes the other person she’s singing about completely vague, while we know she isn’t happy with whichever guy she’s dating.

Mayhaps an early reaction to PRomances?

Either way this song is so good, truly an underrated gay gem I mean. Look at it.

“Breaking down and coming undone/It's a roller coaster kind of rush/And I never knew I could feel that much/And that's the way I loved you”

AND THE BRIDGE. Do all of her gay songs just have kickass bridges?

“He can't see the smile I'm faking/And my heart's not breaking/'Cause I'm not feeling anything at all/And you were wild and crazy/Just so frustrating/Intoxicating, complicated/Got away by some mistake and now…”

Damn. I’m imaging this with 2020 vocals and fucking ascending.

Also please watch the live performance of it from the Fearless tour. It’s such a damn shame this got cut from the movie and some woman in the front row is wearing a cowboy hat. Everyone is holding up those cameras everyone had to have before smartphones. Taylor is being endearing. It’s a good time.

11. Forever and Always 6/10

Bonus points for the ~drama~ of it all. Added last minute to the album? The iconic throwing of the chair in live performances?? All of it very dramatique and for that we stan.

Still pretty straight.

Also Joe Jonas responded to the song and why do I find his response so damn funny. “It’s part of being a musician, I guess. You write songs about each other.”

This is another song where the idea of Taylor’s grown up vocals on this is………..whew

12. The Best Day 0/10

This gets zero points because it’s about her literal mom.

Still makes me cry.

God bless Andrea Swift indeed

13. Change 13/10

We start the official tracklist with a gay song. We end it with a gay song.

We will ignore that it was originally written for Scott and BMR and instead induct it into the hall of gay pride anthems, as it should be.

“We're getting stronger now, finding things they never found/They might be bigger but we're faster and never scared/You can walk away, say we don't need this/But there's something in your eyes says we can beat this”

“This revolution, the time will come/For us to finally win/And we'll sing hallelujah, we'll sing hallelujah”

The music video is cringe though lol

14. Jump then Fall 10/10

This song is gay because I choose it to be. <3

Like. Picture baby Taylor writing this song and playing it on her guitar to a girl she has a crush on telling her that she’ll protect her and they’ll be safe and in love and happy together. Gah, maybe I’m ~projecting~ but this sweet ass song always gets me and is EASILY in my top five Taylor songs. Super underrated and hecking cute.

“We're on the phone and without a warning/I realize your laugh is the best sound/I have ever heard”

Like. Look at this shit.

“I watch you talk, you didn't notice/I hear the words but all I can think is/We should be together”

Tell me this is about the first time you get a crush on a girl and she’s your best friend and she’s amazing and beautiful and you realize you kinda want to kiss her and you hope she wants to kiss you too.

“I had time to think it oh, over/And all I can say is come closer/Take a deep breath and jump then fall into me”

And she’s the Romeo who's going to protect her!!!!! She’s the knight in shining armor in this song and I love that for her??

“The bottom's gonna drop out from under our feet/I'll catch you, I'll catch you/When people say things that bring you to your knees/I'll catch you/The time is gonna come when you're so mad you could cry/But I'll hold you through the night until you smile”

I won’t divulge into full on analysis here because. This is what this post is about but PLEASE listen to this song more. It’s such a gay little gem.

15. Untouchable 9/10

How does she make a cover sound gay.

It sounds so gay.

“You got to come on, come on, say that we'll be together/Come on, come on, little taste of heaven”

Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay

16. Forever and Always Piano Version 1/10

This song gets 1/10 because I don’t like it. There. I said it.

17. Come in With the Rain 3/10

I can see why this is a bonus track. It doesn’t hit me as much as the other songs on the album.

But damn if I don’t want to scream sing this one driving down a high way.

18. Superstar 7/10

You can’t tell me this song is about a man. I simply won’t entertain the idea.

You cannot prove to me that this song is about a man. There is not a male pronoun in sight.

>:)

19. The Other Side of the Door 6/10

Is this song about having a fight about being in the closet? Probably not. Will my gay little brain make it about that? Yep!

And that, funky little queer pals, is my gay rating of every Fearless song. Like and subscribe, #t3atmidnight

#long post //#fearless the album #gaylor #what do i tag this for it to show up for peope??#gay rating

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unlikelymilkshakedream · 4 years

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A/n: Hello! Really important, before you read this, this was inspired by @negans-lucille-tblr 's Daddys Little Princess one-shot. Please read that before you read this or it won't make sense. She has many more amazing fics so read those as well. Enjoy!

*tw* sexual assault, rape

**Flash forwards 3 weeks after the original story**

It all just started as a typical night, your brothers and dad on a hunt as you sat in the freezing motel room with an involuntary shiver running down your spine.

As you lay on the couch, not able to fall asleep, watching the stupid soap opera on the black and white TV, your mind traveled and you wished it hadn't. It hadn't been long since the night you came home from a party, clearing showing signs you had had sex.

The only problem is, you don't remember it. You do however remember the fury you saw in your fathers eyes when your two brothers brought you home and he saw the state you were in. You were sure he was going to shoot you on the spot. You didnt want him to be mad at you, you hadn't even remembered the sex.

As soon as he saw you, you knew he was doing his best to keep from grabbing a knife and stabbing you. You were more scared than you've ever been in that moment because he's never been mad at you ever. To see him like that had you thinking of an escape plan. He instead decided to get the hell out of dodge.

So there you were laying in your motel room three states over, with the thinnest blanket ever. You hadn't even know you had fallen asleep until the door swung open and the lights flicked on. You covered your head with the blanket and let out an audible groan.

"Y/n? What the hell are you doing?" Your brother sam asked you.

"I was sleeping, turn off the fucking light." The absolute worst way to wake someone up was by turning on the lights.

"Y/n, language. Dean get the lights." Dean walked through the door and turned off the lights.

"Where were you guys anyway? Nothing can be open at this hour." You sat up and rubbed your eyes, stretching your back and your shirt rode up a little. You failed to realize the quickly averted eyes of sam and dean.

"Salt n burn. Quick and easy, sorry to wake you sweetheart, go back to sleep. In fact that goes for all of you." John said as he kissed your head.

"Okay daddy." You yawned as you layed down and fell asleep again.

The next morning you woke up and only sam and dean were there. "Wheres dad?" You asked as you walked into the kitchen, your shirt settling on your hips nicely.

"Coroner's office, they called and said it was urgent." You grabbed a cup of coffee and sat down next to dean.

"And you guys didn't go with him? If its urgent why wouldn't you go?" Sam shrugged.

"He said he wanted us to stay with you until you wake up. Now that your up, we have to go into town. A woman called and said her house was broken into. Figured we check it out for dad." You nodded sipping your coffee. Soon enough sam and dean left you.

"Alone, once again, oh joy." You said to yourself. You decided to take a nice long hot shower. Going to the bathroom, you turn the water on, temperature all the way up. Once your shower was over, you threw on some shorts and a hoodie. You walked out and turned on the TV, watching the film that was on.

As the hours ticked by, you hadn't heard anything from anyone. You called your dad but got no answer, called again and got no answer so decided to call dean. As his voice-mail started to play, you found it incredibly weird that no one was answering. Just then the door burst open and in walked sam and dean.

"Hey y/n, whats up?" Dean asked as he set down food on the table. Sam followed and you sighed relief.

"I called you and dad multiple times. Got no answer. Where were you all day?" You stood and walked to the table annoyed.

"Well we went to the woman's house and looked around. Guess what we found." You looked at him annoyed. "Sulfur." Your nose scrunched up.

"How? I thought dad said there was a ghost not demon." You sat down across from your brothers who were devouring their food.

"Well he must've been wrong because we went to the hospital and saw a pattern. Every victim went to the same house on the old road outside town. Dad decided to go take a look at the house." You swallowed your food.

"Again, why didn't you go with him?"

"We were hungry and he said if he needed anything he'd come get us." You nodded and finished your food. You looked outside seeing the dark sky night.

Just then, your phone buzzed multiple times. You looked at it and saw a text from someone from the school you had gone to 3 weeks prior, the one your dad fled from. It was the only person from there you still had the number of. You look at sam and dean who are looking at you.

"Apparently California has an earthquake. A news app just alerted me." You lied. They both nodded and went back to their food. A second later, the phone buzzed in your hand, not nearly as loud at the previous messages. You look at your phone and see a video from Caleb, the kid you kept the number of.

"Hey I'm gonna use the bathroom." Both of your brothers nodded. They didn't think anything of your behavior. Both of them quickly decided they would never tell a sole what they did, seeing as you didn't know anything. They were going to take the secret to their graves.

Once you got inside the bathroom, you opened the text conversation between you and Caleb. You saw three new texts with a video. The texts confused you.

There's no way this is you, right?

Did you really do that?

Im so sorry you had to see it this way.

You were so confused, you opened the video and saw something you never thought you'd ever see. It was a video of the night of the party, the night your dad took you from the town you were in. You were seen laying on the bed, your eyes closed and you saw the guy above you. You recognized him from the school and hated him instantly.

As the video played, you saw your brothers come into the room and stopped the guy, you were asleep and it was clear he was trying to take advantage of you. You saw your brothers beat the guy and kick him out of the room. You didn't think that much of it, in fact you were proud that they protected you like you knew you would protect them.

You didn't think anything of it and were about to close the video when you saw dean start touching you, in places he shouldn't.

You eyes were glued to the screen as your jaw fell open and all thoughts left your brain, except 'there's no fucking way.' You watched as sam and dean opened your legs, as dean started fingering you and as sam watched. You realized it was from a corner of the room, a security camera possibly.

When you saw dean take his dick out if his pants and move yours down, you felt tears slip down your cheeks. You kept silently begging it not to happen, but then it did. You watched as dean put his cock in your pussy and start fucking you, you saw sam watching and getting hard. You saw dean holding you down. Tears were streaming down your face and everything in you told you to turn it off, but then something even worse happened.

Dean pulled out and came on your stomach, and you saw sam hesitantly come between your legs. "No sammy," you whispered as more tears streamed down your face. You watched as sam started fucking you and moaning, seeing you laying there with no control over what was happening, you felt sick to your stomach. You watched as you started to wake up and dean held you down and you cried even more.

You watched as sam grabbed your thigh, and you looked down at your current thigh, seeing a bruise that looked like someone grabbed you. You had it since that night and then it hit you, sam gave it to you.

At this point, you turned off the video and started pacing, you were having a panic attack as you tried to disbelieve what you had just witnessed. 'There's no way, there's no way, there's no way that just happened.' But it did and you couldn't deny the gut wrenching feeling of the so dark truth you knew.

Just then, you heard a knock on the door, followed by deans voice. "Y/n, you die in there or something?" You froze, dean. The same dean that, no, that raped you. They both, truly raped you. It hit you like a freight train, your brothers, raped you. "Y/n?" He knocked again.

You took a deep breathe and tried to compose you voice. "Y-yeah, give me a sec." You said in the most wobbly, broken voice you had ever heard. You mentally cursed yourself, now he knew something was wrong. "Y/n, open the door. Now." You were shaking at how scared you were of him. "Y/n open the god damn door!" He screamed. You knew sam was next to him and were so scared by both of them. You tried your best to wipe your tears off of your face.

As you opened the door, you saw sam and dean at the threshold, staring at you. It was sam who spoke up.

"Y/n, are you okay? What happned?" He reached for your arm, which you recoiled harshly at, that certainly didn't go unnoticed by either of them. All your effort to stop the tears failed as you looked up at them.

"What did you do to me?" You whispered so quietly, they almost didn't hear you. With tears streaming down your face, you showed them your phone, the video still on your screen. Sam looked like he'd seen a ghost and dean looked like he just shit himself. As dean went to say something, the door to the motel room burst open and in came you father.

"Sam, dean, y/n, let's go. We got a house of demons outside town that need to be killed- whats going on?" He was packing his guns in a hurry but stopped when he saw the three of you frozen to the spot. Both of your brothers looked towards you.

"Nothing daddy, just cramps. Where're the demons?" He walked over to you as sam and dean walked away.

"Baby do you need to stay here? We need your help but if you can't I get it." You shook your head, tears completely gone.

"No daddy, I'm fine I promise, I can help, I want to." You needed to help your father, but you were so scared of sam and dean. He started packing his guns and you went to his truck with him. "Sam, dean follow us, come on sweetheart." As you climbed into his truck, you didn't dare look at sam and dean. They got into the impala silently as you and John left the motel.

The ride to the house was silent in johns truck. As you pulled up, he explained that there were five demons inside, the men responsible for majority, you help if you can without getting killed. The entire time you were at the house, you didn't dare be alone or near sam and dean. Fear of them was constant on your mind, but you needed to help your dad so you tried to not think about it.

Sneaking around the back alone, you saw a demon alone watching through a window. You took your chance and threw holy water on it, instantly burning it as it looked towards you. You started fighting the demon and were winning until John, Sam, and dean came around the back after killing the others. Dean and sam took care of the demon as John rushed to you, checking you for wounds.

When sam and dean killed the demon, you kept your gaze on John, not looking at sam and dean, who shared a glance, remembering your encounter with them.

You got back in johns truck as you watched in the rear view mirror as dean got into the impala. John started the truck and you all went back to the motel. Before the trucks engine even died down, you were at the motel door heading straight to the bed. You layed down as the three men entered.

"Y/n? You okay sweetheart?" John asked. You didn't look at anything besides the wall in front of you.

"Yeah, daddy, I'm fine, just tired, gonna go to sleep." You shut your eyes and heard them shuffle around for about 10 minutes. You of course did not see the way sam and dean were looking at each other. Eventually they went to sleep at which point, you got up and started packing your bag, so hurriedly, you for sure grabbed something that wasn't yours. You looked at your phone and decided against it, knowing they could track you from it.. You didn't know where you were going or how you were gonna get there, but you just knew, you had to get away from sam and dean before they try to rape you again. You were guided solely by fear.

You knew you couldn't leave from the front door, you didn't want to be tracked at all and figured someone might see you. You didn't leave a note or anything, you grabbed your bag, and a wad of about five hundred dollars and went to the bathroom. You shut the door, opened the window and climbed out.

You walked across the street to the gas station, looking at a clock seeing it was about 2 am. You looked around hoping for someone or something to get you out of town and away from sam and dean. You could feel the tears streaming down your face and heard a car pull up next to you.

Some blonde guy reached over the seat and opened the door. "Hey, you look like you could use a ride." You looked around one last time, at dads truck, at the impala and at the motel and climbed in. "Yeah, thank you."

You said wiping a stray tear. "Where you heading?" You sniffled.

"Anywhere, I don't care, just anywhere but here." With that the car started up and you drove into the night, feeling a little easier knowing that sam and dean would never find you again. You didn't care if they would be worried or if they thought a monster had got you. You knew now that you were going to be okay, Sam and dean would never see you again.

Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it, again this was inspired by @negans-lucille-tblr 's post so go look at her page, she has amazing fics and is an amazing writer.

#supernatural #spn #sam winchester #dean winchester #john winchester #winchester boys #winchester sister #sam winchester x y/n #sam winchester x reader #dean winchester x female!reader #dean winchester x you #dean winchester x reader #supernatural angst #spn angst #winchester angst #winchester sibling

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kingonafiftymetreroad · 4 years

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Fic Rec Post

Hey everybody! One of my secret santas asked me what my favorite fics are so I decided to make a full blown rec post just for them. These are a little all over the place so I hope you can find something that you enjoy here! ☁️✨

Please make sure to read all tags and warnings before reading a fic. And don’t forget to kudos/comment!

🌙 The Finish Line (Is A Good Place For Us To Start) by LoadedGunn 122k

Louis Tomlinson, one-time Formula 1 World Champion, is looking forward to the 2013 season. He’s got Zayn in his garage and Liam in his ear, he’s got Cowell Racing backing him despite former indiscretions, he’s got experience and the best race car out there. Not to mention he’s the only racer they have, after Oliver dropped out late last year.

It hasn’t occurred to him that Oliver would have to be replaced by February. That is, until he finds himself at a party celebrating Harry Styles leaving Ferrari for Cowell. Harry hotshot Styles, who broke a record last year and is probably looking to make a big splash. Harry Styles, who is talented and somewhat intimidating. Harry Styles, who left Ferrari for reasons unknown and seems kind of lonely and harmless in person. Lonely, harmless, hot as fuck. Whatever.

The first thing Louis does is take him under his wing. From there it’s nine months of slow-burning romance, the past catching up to them, turning into the human puppy pile that is OT5 and a lot of feelings until, of course, reaching the finish line.

🌙 a promise lives within you now by sarcasticfluentry 46k

A Lord of the Rings-inspired Middle Earth AU. Louis is an Elven prince, next in line to become King of Mirkwood, and Harry is the orphaned Human boy who grows up alongside him. They fall in love, but Louis’s obligations to the throne, Harry’s mortality, and impending war threaten to tear them apart.

🌙 if you're for real and not pretend by brownheadedstranger 21k

In which Harry works in a bakery and Louis can't seem to find what he's looking for.

🌙 Into The Blue by zarah5 117k (story is locked, ao3 account required to read)

AU. In which Louis is Harry's scuba instructor and quite happy to provide the requested special treatment, pun fully intended. It can't be all that difficult to convince Harry that they're on the same page, right? Also, Niall and Liam may or may not be dating, and Zayn is surrounded by emotionally stunted idiots. He bears it with dignity.

🌙 Don't Unplug Me Or Shut Me Down by slashter 7k

Louis scowls. "He's a photography student. He works with gorgeous models and probably breaks hearts with his smile. I'm a nerd. I earn my money fixing broken crap, and for some stupid reason, I like it. He wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts, he's cheer captain and I'm on the bleachers, et cetera, et cetera." Louis sighs. "I swear, the coolest thing I've ever done is wear contacts."

Basically, Louis is a self-proclaimed nerd who fixes things and Harry seems too perfect to keep breaking as many things as he does.

🌙 You Are The Blood by sarcasticfluentry 175k

A seventh-year Hogwarts AU in which Niall gets all the girls, Liam goes on a journey of self-discovery, Zayn falls in love, Harry wants something more, and Louis tries to figure out once and for all why he, a Muggleborn, was sorted into Slytherin.

🌙 this must be what all the fuss is about by youcomecrash 3k

"You're sweaty," he mumbles matter-of-factly. Louis opens his eyes and raises his head from between his arms. Harry's just staring up at him with a lazy expression and Louis kind of wants to kiss him to sleep. "That's because it's a hundred degrees in here, babe."

🌙 I Fell From the Sky For You (Like a Shooting Star) [by louserz] by waddupjordan (orphan_account) 8k (This was originally posted on tumblr by @louserz and this person had permission to post it on ao3 for the author. if the original author sees this and wants me to take this off of my rec post please DM me and I will. This fic displays elements of depression and homelessness although it is not tagged that way so please take caution in reading this. I don’t want to accidentally trigger anybody.<3)

Harry owns a bookstore, Louis is homeless, and apparently even shooting stars fall in love.

🌙 Sail Across Me by iwillpaintasongforlou 21k

Harry is a prince that is about to be forced into marriage against his will and running away to sea seems like a much better option. Louis is the captain of the infamous pirate ship The Rogue and he has a thing for helping defenseless creatures. Especially when they're as pretty as this one.

🌙 but maybe im just in love when you wake me up by theonewiththelarrystories 6k

lazy morning sex, prompted by Asher: "like a whole sleepy sunday morning vibe of waking up together and then louis pulling a sleepy harry into a warm bath and louis washing harry all over. a bit of body!worship, louis gently working conditioner into harrys curls and him practically purring. Then louis taking it slow with kisses on harrys neck and gentle touches and then fingering harry until hes whining with his head thrown back against louis’ shoulder little needy noises coming from his perfect fucking lips. and then harrys boneless and content while louis leads him back to their bed and spreads him out face down and rims the fuck out of him until hes screaming and then he fucks him gently and then they cuddle on the couch and harry wears louis’ white sweater and louis calls him ‘sweetheart.’"

🌙 strawberry milk fic by Wankerville 158k (3 parts)

This is a 3 part story. The 1st part was originally written alone and then the author added the rest. You can just read the 1st part (19k), and you’ll still be satisfied without feeling added pressured to read the whole thing. Please read all the tags and warnings for each fic beforehand!

🌙 and we live like legends now by soleilouis 16k girl!direction

harry works at a juice bar, and louis is the cute girl that skates at the park right next door.

🌙 Through Eerie Chaos by MediaWhore 102k (story is locked, ao3 account required to read) @mediawhorefics

For as long as anyone can remember, Old Hillsbridge Manor has always been believed to be haunted. Everyone in the village agrees and keeps a respectful, fearful, distance. New in town after a bad breakup and an internship that led to disappointment rather than a permanent job, Harry Styles figures taking pictures of the decrepit building could be a great new creative project. Or at least a much-needed distraction while he searches for a job and crashes at his parents’ new house. No one warned him about the apparitions though; about the music, the laughter, the people who flicker and vanish when you call after them, the echoes of a past that should be long gone… Harry has never believed in spirits but even he can admit that there’s something weird going on. What starts as mere curiosity evolves into a full-blown investigation and soon enough, Harry finds himself making friends with an aristocrat from the 1920s and struggling with finding the best way to tell him that he’s dead.

The Ghost Hunter AU where Niall lives to prove ghosts are real, Zayn is a skeptical librarian and Harry gets caught up in a century-old mystery and catches feeling in the process.

🌙 jump in the deep end by istajmaal 5k

Louis’s stomach lurches as he closes the last bit of distance, Harry’s nose settling between his arse cheeks and pushing them apart. Harry’s lips brush against the puckered skin around Louis’s hole in a kiss and Louis lets out a whine so high-pitched he barely recognizes it as coming from himself—what if I'm not clean enough, what if Harry hates it, what if Harry pushes me away—but then Harry’s long, wet tongue swoops in a circle around Louis’s rim and Louis feels like all the breath is knocked out of him. He grabs for Harry’s hand, still digging into his thigh, and squeezes over it, until Harry releases his vice grip on Louis’s thigh and laces his fingers through Louis’s.

or, Louis's arse is a sensitive subject, so Harry approaches it gently. With his tongue.

🌙 the wheel breaks the butterfly by embodied 4k girl!direction @aliensingucci

“Out with it, Styles,” Louis groans. Harry’s suddenly regretting this whole thing, and she’s sure she’s beet red now, so she just blurts it out so fast she’s not sure if Louis even understands her right away.

“I’ve never gotten head before.”

AU. harry and louis are roommates. girls' night ends a little differently than usual.

🌙 you flower, you feast by stylinsoncity 18k

He's King of the Underworld, but don't assume Louis has it all. He could stand for some excitement in his monotonous, eternal life and maybe, even.....a soulmate.

(Despite not having a soul.)

And along came "Harry".

🌙 you change, water sea by got2ghost 4k girl!direction (ziam with side larry)

“Zayn wants me to teach her how to make a girl squirt,” Louis says, like it’s the most casual thing in the world. Liam chokes on the water she’d been swigging from her thermos, which makes Louis throw her head back and laugh. Zayn’s brows pinch together and she pats Liam gently on the shoulder, muttering, ‘you okay babes?’

🌙 The Case Of The (Definitely Not Haunted) Styles Mansion by BriaMaria 40k

“So there’s a sense of humor buried beneath all that condescension, huh?” Louis said when he’d stopped laughing.

“It’s not condescension, it’s intelligence. I understand you might not be able to recognize it yourself,” Marcel said, then slapped a hand over his mouth. “Oh god, I’m sorry.”

Louis stepped closer, his eyes on Marcel’s face. “For being an asshat?”

“For being rude,” Marcel said, from beneath his palm.

Louis shifted a half-step closer until he was at the very edge of Marcel’s personal space. It felt like he was nudging at it, asking to be let in. Marcel flushed hot for no reason.

“Lucky for you it takes quite a lot to actually insult me,” Louis said taking one step closer. Too close. Too close.

Marcel met Louis’ eyes. Those blue eyes that reminded Marcel of poetry instead of science, lyrics instead of formulas. They were so pretty he wanted to drown in them.

---

Or the Nancy Drew AU where Marcel is a man of logic, Louis is a private detective who believes in ghosts, and the Styles Mansion is definitely, absolutely, positively *not* haunted.

🌙 You are the Lyrics by TheIfInLife 4k @larryficwriter

or, Harry wears lingerie for the first time and Louis definitely approves.

🌙 Wild at Heart Ain't Hard to Find by QuickedWeen 11k girl!direction @becomeawendybird

Louis and her best friends Niall and Liam always take an annual vacation together. This year Niall has picked Redwater Canyon, a small tourist town where everyone lives like it's the Old West. There are saloons, stagecoaches, and limited access to WiFi.

The town boasts tours, excursions, activities, and the hottest woman Louis has ever seen in the form of the local blacksmith.

🌙 Withdrawal Was the Weeping by QuickedWeen 11k girl!direction

Confined by life and society, Harry spends her Sunday afternoons walking aimlessly about the countryside as it's her only source of freedom. One Sunday she is aided by the most beautiful woman she has ever met, but not everything is as it seems. Was it a trick of the light? Was it Harry's own active imagination? There is nothing to do but try to find her again.

🌙 i must admit i thought i'd like to make you mine by disgruntledkittenface 50k @disgruntledkittenface

Louis fell apart when her ex broke up with her and moved across the country. Just as she’s starting to move on, Zayn comes back to town for their mutual friends’ wedding – with a new girlfriend as her plus one.

Blindsided and scrambling to save face, Louis lets herself get talked into a fake relationship with her new friend Harry. Their arrangement makes Louis feel pathetic and embarrassed, but it’s only going to last a few weeks. She just has to get through the wedding – what could happen?

🌙 tempted by the fruit of another by disgruntledkittenface 3k (zayn/louis/harry)

Zayn didn’t mean to look. And she certainly didn’t mean to watch.

It’s just that Louis and Harry are the worst hosts in the world; they’re in their bedroom, clearly fucking (again), and so loud that Zayn can’t concentrate on her game of Among Us in the living room. Liam has killed her twice. Liam. So she just went down the hallway to make sure their bedroom door was at least closed.

It wasn’t.

Zayn stumbles into a world of possibility when she stays with Harry and Louis for a few weeks.

🌙 I have more favorite fics but they are not included here due to them being deleted from ao3. They’re saved in PDF form both on my laptop and my phone (I go back and read them all the time) so if you’re interested in those you’re welcome to reach out to me and ask privately and I’ll share what I can.

This turned out a lot longer than I had expected. If you read through the whole thing thank you! ✨

#☁️✨#fic rec #masterpost #long post #fic rec masterpost #ls #fav #i plan on adding more fics as i read them too #hope ur able to find something to read ss!#if ur looking for more specific types of fics lmk and ill see what i got :)#fic #larry stylinson #my post #my recs

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gordvendomewhore · 4 years

Text

BULLY OC MEME [CHRIS KATO]

hey!! so i meant to post this uh. MONTHS ago, but...later is better than never LMAOO

if you’ve been following me for awhile, you might’ve heard me mention chris and hollis before!! they are my ocs, and they’re actually from an original story of mine lmao they weren’t made for bully.

this is chris’s template!! hollis’s will be posted right after this!!

also fair warning im not,,, japanese so her japanese dialogue might not be 100% accurate and maybe even cringey but im basing all my info on google translate (ew i know), japanese websites, my friend who speaks the language, and my own experiences with mixing foreign languages into english lmao.

anyway, have fun reading this if you do!! and feel free to ask any questions you might have about chris uwu (photos of her are at the end!!)

[INFO]

Name: Christine Konami Kato (加藤琥波 Kato Konami)

Gender: Female

Pronouns: She/Her

Sexuality: Lesbian

Clique: Non-cliques, but on good terms with the greasers

Personality: Blunt, indifferent, critical, philosophical.

Weapon/fighting style of choice:

- Chris can hold herself in a physical fight, but not well enough to actually win without any major injury (unless it’s against the Nerds, Bullies, or Non-Cliques).

- However, she is incredibly fast and has insanely accurate aim, which fuels her preference for projectile weapons.

- In fights, Chris will run away from her opponent and turn back to throw whatever weapon she has at them; It gives her the advantage of distance.

- Chris doesn’t really care about beating someone else up to the point of them passing out, she just wants to cause chaos and escape without a busted lip.

- While she’ll use any projectile weapon, Chris prefers firecrackers. She’ll also occasionally use marbles.

[DIALOGUE]

Greetings:

- Hey, Hopkins.

- What’s up?

- Nice seeing you around, Jimmy.

Saying Goodbye:

- I gotta go. My girl’s waiting for me.

- Hate to cut the conversation short, but there’s better things I have to do.

- Someone’s calling my name. See you later.

Chasing:

- Idiot, you really think you can outrun me?

- My parents had to run all the way to Japan to escape me, Hopkins!

- Can’t you run any faster? You’re making this too easy, Hopkins!

Out of Breath:

- God...maybe...I should cut back on the cigarettes...

- ちくしょう。。。(Damn it...)

- ...Whatever. There’s better things to do.

Walking around talking to themselves:

- I miss Japan.

- Can’t wait to see this place go down in flames. Metaphorically and literally.

- 彼女はとても可愛い。。。(She’s so cute...)

- Gotta check up on Hollis later.

- I miss おばあちゃん。(I miss grandma.)

- Don’t the jocks have better things to do than hunt me down?

- Do I have my lighter?

- Everyone in this 不浄な地 thinks they’re so great. (Everyone in this shithole thinks they’re so great.) (Note: the direct translation of 不浄な地 is “unclean land.”)

Conversing:

- You hear about Gary’s new pet? Now he has another weasel to go along with that runt, Kowalski.

- I hear Johnny Vincent’s having trouble keeping his relationship together. And his mental stability, but everyone already knows that.

- Ever light a car on fire?

- You hear about Gary’s big, bad plan?

- I’m not an arsonist! It’s not like I burnt down my entire middle school!

- Word on the street says Peanut has it real bad for the boss. Seems like every second in command does.

Conversation Response:

- I hope not.

- You did what?

- Yeah, no.

- Sure.

- Karma’s coming your way.

- Sure, doesn’t sound too bad.

- Mhm, yeah.

Complaining:

- I wish that Northwick kid would stop bothering me.

- Johnny’s just pissed because my girl actually wants me.

- I love Hollis, but I cannot stand another four hours of posing for one of her paintings.

- They couldn’t just take me back with them. They just had to send me to this hellhole.

- God, I need another cigarette.

- The greasers are so clingy.

Unknown/Cut Dialogue:

- Yeah, yeah, my girlfriend will pay you.

- くたばれ！(Fuck off!)

- ...Naked twister?

- Maybe the tooth fairy will give you a few dollars for the teeth I knock out.

- Who knew I’d be coming to you for help, huh?

- Don’t...drink hand soap? I feel like I shouldn’t have to tell you this.

Starting fight with Cliques:

[Bullies]

- Don’t make this any harder for yourself.

- Let’s make this quick, yeah?

- Your mom hit me harder in bed last night!

- Don’t you think you’d look so much cooler in a neck brace?

- ああ, 黙れ. (Oh, just shut up.)

[Preps]

- Pretend I’m daddy’s black card and run faster!

- Let’s see if your blood’s actually blue.

- Inbred freak!

- Boxing rules don’t apply when you can’t even touch me! [Laughs]

- 青鬼! (Blue demon!)

[Greasers]

- Come on, we smoke together, I’m basically one of you!

- I hope your hair products aren’t flammable.

- Is this because I don’t slick my hair back?

- Is this because I don’t wear a leather jacket?

- くたばれ! (Drop dead!)

[Nerds]

- I’ll let you take your glasses off before I break your face.

- You don’t want a repeat of Alexandria, do you?

- Roll that D20; It’ll decide how many of your bones I’m gonna break.

- 弱虫! (Wimp!)

- Maybe you should start taking that saying, “Hit the books,” more literally.

[Jocks]

- You can’t break my spine if you can’t catch me!

- ‘Roid rage alert!

- Work on your cardio, 下衆野郎! (Asshole!)

- You’re supposed to avoid the firecracker, not catch it with your face.

- とんちき！(Meathead!)

[Townies]

- Save your bitching for someone who cares.

- We’re both poor! Shouldn’t there be some form of solidarity?

- ばかげた! (Flunky!)

- Hit me if you can!

- Chase after the preps instead! They can get you free healthcare if you beat it out of them!

Requesting an errand:

- Hey, Jimmy, got a second to spare?

- You owe me, Hopkins. You know that saying, an eye for an eye.

- I have a favor to cash in. Uh-uh-uh, don’t try backing out of this.

Friendly Comments:

- Woah, you look half-decent for once, Hopkins.

- Maybe you can finally get a girlfriend now.

- New wardrobe, huh? Doesn’t look too bad.

- You finally fixed your looks! Now you just gotta fix your personality.

Unfriendly Comments:

- You make me want to light myself on fire.

- It’s cute seeing you follow in your mom’s footsteps, やりまん. (Slut.)

- Don’t even try making eye contact with me.

- [Loud Snickering] Oh, sorry, I wasn’t laughing at you! [Sarcasm]

[EXTRA]

Demanding flowers:

- Come on, you gotta prove you’re worth my time.

- You got something special for me, don’t you, Hopkins?

- Don’t you think it’s time you pay me back for my kindness?

- A little something would be nice...

After receiving flowers:

- Thanks, my girlfriend loves flowers.

- Such a gentleman, James. Too bad I’ve never had a thing for men.

- ...Are these from the Girl’s Dorm?

- It’ll be fun to burn these, thank you.

Before kissing:

(No matter what, Jimmy can’t actually kiss Chris)

- [Bad Japanese Accent] Uh, sorry, no English.

- I’d like to avoid getting cooties if possible, thanks.

- I got a girlfriend, Hopkins.

- Sorry, I’m allergic to boys.

@video-space this is 4 you....

#christine kato #my girl...i love her so much #original character #oc #bully oc #canis canem edit #bully canis canem edit #bully scholarship edition #cce #mine

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petri808 · 4 years

Link

Fandom: Fairy Tail. Rating: Mature. Nalu AU ANGST trigger warning. Based on this post. Just under 10k words

Lucy Heartfilia is diagnosed with a heart defect. Stuck in the hospital waiting on the transplant list, there is only one thing bringing any light to her dreary world; a volunteer named Natsu Dragneel who truly becomes her bittersweet savior.

@uzumaki2810 Here you go, I hope you like it :) Also thank you to the angst queen @doginshoe IM SORRY I FORGOT TO ADD THIS MESSAGE ;-; she beta’d and bore the tears with me to make sure it was a good story :)

~~ ~~ ~~ ~~

It all started back in her last year of middle school when puberty really kicked into overdrive and she developed a well-endowed chest. She assumed the little pricks of pain related to the added weight cause they sure gave her a backache if she pushed herself too hard. Exercise was overly exhausting, so there went any chances of making the cheer squad in high school. Not that Lucy was really interested in sports, but by the start of high school she realized any physical activity needed to be avoided. But she didn’t want to worry her father since it was a random pain that would only surface if she exerted herself; ergo it was her boob’s fault, and she kept the pain to herself.

As time passed, and her high school years carried on, Lucy did her best to ignore the symptoms, even when something new manifested itself. Fatigue… she was studying too hard. Rapid heartbeat… well, there was that cute boy that just walked by. Shortness of breath when she laid down… it’s just from the weight of her chest. Each and every time, Lucy found a rational explanation. She buried her nose in her studies as an outlet, which she really didn’t mind so much. Her favorite thing to do in the world was to write quick fantasy stories she’d make up, and she’d often spend her breaks holed up in the library researching some new topic of dragons or fairies or whatever had caught her attention.

“Ugghhhh,” Lucy flinches as the blinding white light breaks through the surface of her vision. She shields her eyes and slowly opens them but can only manage a tiny squint. Her mind was groggy, and she swore her limbs felt like dead weights. “W-Where am I?”

She hears the muffled sound of her father’s voice calling for a doctor. Why was there a slight ringing in her ear? Something about she’s awake now, hurry? The rest had been too muffled to understand. Had she been asleep? Lucy was completely confused. But the light… the light was so bright!

“Ms. Heartfilia? Ms. Heartfilia, can you hear me?”

It was a strange male voice talking to her. Where did her father go?

“Yes,” she croaks out, flinching as her body is coming out of its slumber and suddenly a sharp pain hits her again. Lucy winces, this was worse than before.

“Ms. Heartfilia, do you know where you are?”

She shakes her head.

“You’re in the hospital, dear.”

Wait! It was her father’s voice again. What did he mean she was in a hospital! Lucy forces herself to open her eyes fully, though, keeping her hand between her face and the overhead lights. “Why am I in a hospital?!”

Lucy hears the doctor's voice again, seemingly at a distance because her viewpoint was limited, speaking to someone. Fainted. Temporary amnesia. Congenital heat disease. Wait what?! “Hey what’s going on?!” she calls out then is hit by another spike of pain. Damn it! “Dad? Hello?!” But it’s like she was being ignored. Birth defect. Advanced case. Surgery. “Someone please talk to me!” Tears prick at the corners of her eyes. “Talk to me!!!” A third, and now the largest stab of pain hits her. Lucy cries out at the pain and curls in on herself. More shouting and the voice returns, hands probing something near her chest, and machines starting to blare out warning beeps.

“Please calm down Ms. Heartfilia, calm down, don’t push yourself too much or the pain will get worse.”

How could this get any worse…

That was 3 years ago, and the sands of time were running low.

Her father had done all he could, dragging her to specialist after specialist, exhausting a chunk of his fortune on doctors from one coast to the other, only to be told Lucy would need a heart transplant or she may not see her twenty-first birthday. The most they could do for her while she waited on the transplant list was implant a ventricular assist device into her body. It gave her a small measure of freedom instead of being tied to a normal transcutaneous machine, but it was still uncomfortable. Her movements were restricted, she had to be careful of catching a cold, and what ended up being the hardest part, was the breast reduction surgery they had her undergo at the same time of the VAD surgery to reduce the weight and strain it added to her heart.

For so long she’d blamed her large breasts for causing all her pains, but now that she knew they weren’t, it was sad to see them go. They were a part of her after all, no matter how much of a headache they could be. For weeks after the surgery, Lucy could barely look at herself in the mirror. She didn’t recognize herself anymore. This youthful woman with tubes sticking out of her stomach which attached to a device around her waist that helped her weakened heart muscles do their job to keep her alive. That had been the diagnosis, a congenital birth defect that weakened her heart muscles, and as she aged, the muscles would continue to deteriorate. Oh, her father was so furious when they were told she didn’t qualify for an artificial heart because death wasn’t imminent.

It hadn’t taken long after completing high school that the depression had surfaced. All of her friends were moving on to college, most to distant campuses so she had no one to talk to. Lucy would hide away in her bedroom for days at a time as the internal struggle mounted. Why continue to go through this pain and struggle… why not just end it quickly and painlessly. It was tempting. From the research she’d done on heart defects, the end wasn’t very pretty. Her only hope was a donor, but people die every day on the transplant list waiting for a heart that never came, just growing weaker and weaker….

At least the VAD had given her two decent years, but her days of being an outpatient at the hospital had come to an end. Even with the device assisting her heart, Lucy’s body was struggling to deal with the strain. The smallest exertions required fuel from her heart to power her body, so even something as minimal as the fatigue of reading a book for too long could trigger an arrythmia or worse, and the pain that may accompany it. She needed to stay in the hospital so that her heart could be constantly monitored and if there was any sudden change, they could address it quickly.

The doctors were doing their best to keep her alive in the hopes a donor would surface. But you never knew when one would become available, and her time was running short. The original prediction of not making it to twenty-one was fast approaching. Frankly, Lucy felt like it was by the luck of the draw and the odds were better at a Las Vegas casino. It was a lonely experience being cooped up in the hospital and thankfully there was one glimmer of happiness amongst the sterile white halls.

“Lucy!”

“Hi Natsu.”

He smirks, “I brought you something.” The young man was bouncing on the balls of his feet with his hands clasped behind his back.

All the volunteers that visited the hospital were kind people, but there was one that made Lucy smile the most. A young man named Natsu Dragneel. She’d told herself at the beginning of her medical odyssey that she wouldn’t let anyone get too close to her, not only for her protection but there’s. The pain of losing someone you care about was an emotion Lucy had borne at the tender age of five when her mother lost her own battle to cancer, and it was a feeling she didn’t wish upon her worst enemy. But this man sure made that promise a tough one to keep.

Natsu’s adoptive mother was a long-time surgery nurse at this hospital, who had had taught him the value of life. It was because of seeing her kindness towards people that spurred his decision to be a volunteer. Even at eighteen years of age he knew that volunteering would be difficult, and five years later, he would admit it never got any easier. Many volunteers eventually burn out, especially when dealing with the terminal patients, but Natsu pushed through, reminding himself it was those very patients that needed their support the most.

“Oh,” she quirks an eyebrow, “what is it?”

“Tada!” he whips out a single yellow rose with pinkish-red tipped petals and hands it to her. “My younger sister showed me how to dye the tips, isn’t it cool!”

Lucy takes the flower, “wow that is really beautiful! The pink even matches your hair.” She lifts it to her nose and picks up on the light rosy fragrance it exuded. “Smells nice too.” She tries to hand it back to Natsu.

“Tch, my hair’s not pink, it’s salmon, and I made it for you,” he smiles, “something to brighten your day.” Natsu then walks over to the small bathroom and fills a cup with water, brings it back and places it on the small windowsill next to her bed. “For the flower.”

“Thank you,” Lucy blushes a little and hands him back the bloom since she couldn’t reach the cup herself. “It was really kind of you to bring me that Natsu.”

“Nah,” he places the flower in the cup for her, “I’d do anything to make you smile.”

It wasn’t every day, but Natsu would come to see her as often as he could. His regular job as a construction worker wasn’t a regular 9 to 5 kind of thing. Some weeks he might work five days straight, while on slower periods like the winter and early spring months it may only be a couple of days a week depending on weather. He’d told her that working with his hands was something he enjoyed immensely, and the company was training him to be a carpenter.

Natsu sure wasn’t what she’d expected of a construction guy. Oh, his hands showed the roughened appearance of someone who worked hard for a living, but she thought they would be these rough and tumble kind of men. Not Natsu, with his goofy and sweet personality. She could only imagine how well such a line of work helped to keep the man in shape. He always wore t-shirts and jeans, but his trim features hidden behind the fabric were easily discernable.

The light of the sun brought the yellow rose to life along with a slight tremor in her heart, not of pain but of adoration. Lucy smiles sweetly at his remark, her eyes crinkling, glinting with a tinge of moisture she had no control over. She didn’t want to admit her growing affection for this man who always said the sweetest things or made the most charming gestures. Natsu was always so compassionate and supportive, while never making it seem like it was just his job as a volunteer to comfort the patients. It was easy to wish that maybe… he was doing it just for her?

Lucy ducks her head, hiding the hint of jealousy coating her cheeks and tone, “I’m sure you make such kind gestures for the other patients too.”

“Oh, no,” Natsu sits beside her and takes her hand, “just you.” He gently lifts her chin, forcing her to face him. She averts her eyes, but he stares forward, softening his glare, almost wanting to chuckle that he’s had such an effect on her. “You’re special to me.”

Of all the patients in this small hospital, Lucy Heartfilia was the one his heart grieved for the most. It wasn’t fair, at only twenty years old, for this beautiful and intelligent woman to be tied to a hospital bed, watching her life flash by in the form of ridges and valley peaks. The first time they had met was two years ago, but back then she would only come in for overnight monitoring’s or check-ups, and after her major surgery, she stayed for a few months during the recovery process. By now, they were friends, but it had taken work on his part to get her to open up to him.

“No, I’m not…” Lucy sucks the corner of her bottom lip in to stifle the tremor.

His tone deepens in a comeback, “Yes, you are.”

Her eyes finally snap to his, and when she sees the determination behind them, reality kicks in. He was telling the truth! Oh, heaven help her. It was cute to dream, but not for it to be real. She feels a sting in her chest and pushes his hands away. “Please don’t,” her voice is barely a whisper, trembling from the stinging pain in her heart and her soul. “I-I shouldn’t be….” ‘This is so wrong… Because I’m dying and he deserves someone better. I shouldn’t have said anything.’ Stupid little daggers of jealousy! She clutches her chest, willing her heart to still, and pain to subside, ‘please go away!’

“Hey, hey!” Natsu immediately switches his concern from being flirty to concerned. “Lucy please calm down, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to upset you!”

“I-It’s okay, I-I’ll be okay.” She fights the tears back with all the strength she can muster. Lucy didn’t want to cry in front of Natsu. “Please, Natsu, I don’t want to get our hopes up l-like that…. If this… If things were different….”

“Shhh,” he cradles her face, “shhh, it’s okay Luce, I feel the same way.”

After a few moments, Lucy lets out a long exhale. “I appreciate it, I really do.” She looks up and cracks a pained smile. “You’re the only thing keeping me going, but I-I just don’t even want to think about not being there for you…”

It was Natsu’s turn to crack. “Please don’t finish that.” He looks down, holding back the urge to cry or show how upset it makes him. “I don’t want to think about that.”

“But it…”

“You don’t know that, no one knows that, and I,” his voice falters, seething with all the will of his soul placed behind it, “I will cling to hope till my dying breath.”

The sudden change in his demeanor, switches Lucy from feeling so self-absorbed in her own thoughts to realize, Natsu has had an effect on her, but she truly had an effect on him too. It hurt even more now that his behaviors weren’t just a rouse to make her happy, and it killed her to think of what he will suffer when she goes.

“I’m sorry, Natsu. I didn’t realize.” She grabs his hand, squeezing it hard. “Natsu I’m sorry. Let’s stop thinking about this then, hmm,” doing her best to keep her tone soft and comforting. “Look at me, Natsu, please, I don’t want to keep fighting with you.”

He sighs, “you’re right. That’s the last thing I wanna do with you.” It was a surprise even to himself that he’d lost his cool, and for the first time the awareness of his growing infatuation became real.

“Good,” she squeezes his hand again. “Hey, um, you know its lunch time, we could eat outside since it’s a nice day…” her voice grows tentative, “if you’ll join me.”

“Lucy Heartfilia, are you asking me out on a date?” He chuckles, ready to put all the sadness behind them. “Because if that’s the case,” the sparkle in his eyes return, “I would be honored.”

For the next couple of months, Natsu and Lucy’s friendship flourishes, as her physical body slowly deteriorates. It was hard, he couldn’t lie, to watch this happen, and if it wasn’t for the strength of his convictions or his plain stubborn attitude about it that kept him upbeat. He knew that she needed him to be her strength, and that fueled his desire to make sure she smiles every day.

Lucy didn’t know, but his mother would keep him updated on her condition. Not that he needed to know all the technical jargon, for he could see it with his own eyes. Lucy herself would tell him just enough information when she needed to, but he never pushed or pried for it, letting it always be on her terms. The cardiomyopathy was getting worse, her heart muscles barely functioning on its own at this point. She had her good days and bad days but walking around wasn’t really an option anymore aside from brief steps for a purpose. It also meant that the muscles in her legs were weakening too. Physical therapy once a week worked with Lucy on light stretches to keep them from completely atrophying, but it was all they could do for her at this point. But no matter how much weight she lost, or that her hair didn’t hold its familiar luster, to Natsu she would always be the same radiant woman he adored.

She’d resigned herself to this fate a lot better than Natsu would have thought a person could do. When he tried to picture himself in her shoes, he was sure he wouldn’t have the strength to keep going, but that was what amazed him even more about her. On her agreeable days, Natsu enjoyed getting her out of her room, even if for brief periods of time. Lunch or dinner in the cafeteria, the grounds of the hospital on a sunny day, or even stargazing when the evening air was warm. He’d bring a wheelchair, and off they’d go, talking about anything or nothing, avoiding the subject of her condition, just giving her a smidge of a normal existence for once.

Lucy opens her eyes at the knock on her door to see a familiar face pop through. “Hey Natsu,” she cracks a pained smile.

“Hey Luce, how ya doin’ today?”

She starts to sit up in the hospital bed, but when it’s clear to Natsu the woman was struggling, he quickly rushes over and assists. “Thanks,” another light smile. “I’m sorry, I’ve been a little sore today.”

“Never apologize to me,” he smiles back warmly. No matter what, he always did his best to appear upbeat for the patients despite his heart literally breaking for them. He places his hand on hers, “so, tell me gorgeous, are ya hungry? We could dinner date in the cafeteria if you’re up to it. My treat,” he winks.

“Stop calling me gorgeous,” Lucy chides the sunny young man, despite the small rosy glow of her cheeks. “I know I’m not, and that’s okay.” With the help of a psychiatrist and over a year of therapy, Lucy had finally accepted her fate and kept moving forward as best she could. If she will die someday, she will die with dignity. Stress wasn’t very good on her heart, so once she made peace with her circumstances, even her physical ailments had benefitted.

“Pfft,” Natsu pretends to be offended, “are you calling me a liar because I know I’m not blind.” His grin growing along with the deepening of red along her cheeks. “Besides, you know I won’t stop no matter how much you complain about it.”

Lucy laughs and her eyes twinkle, “I know, so we’ll keep agreeing to disagree.”

It was in these moments, and why he did what he did, just to see this woman’s eyes light up, that sent his own heart into palpitations. Deep down Natsu knew that the chances of Lucy making it out of this hospital were slim to none, but you’d never know it when he spoke to her. He stifles the urge to sigh. Oh, how he wished the circumstances were different. In a perfect world, Natsu would love nothing more than to walk this woman down the aisle.

He circles the topic back around, “so… dinner, on me?” he teases lightly with a wink. “We can take a trip through pediatrics where there are a few recent arrivals.”

Her gaze lowers as she hides the seventh heaven emotions the young man stirs in her. “I’d like that.”

Natsu squeezes her hand, “I’ll be right back, lemme grab your carriage milady.”

As Lucy waited the few minutes for Natsu to grab a wheelchair, she closes her eyes and does a breathing technique to calm her heart. She hadn’t wanted to show the slight tinges of pain she was getting as they spoke, because she knew it would have worried him. They’d been steadily increasing in frequency lately, and she fought to keep him from discovering that. But she couldn’t help it. Despite her condition, Lucy was still a young woman with an intact mind, she still had desires like any other, and when a handsome young man close to her age flirted with her, of course she would react to it! She did her best not to let these thoughts sink in too deeply and told herself he was merely doing it to make her feel better. It was a lie, but it was the best way to shield herself.

“Ready?” Natsu extends his hand to help Lucy to her feet.

She nods and takes hold, gripping on while he maneuvers her around and onto the chair. It weakened Lucy to where her muscles were slowly losing their strength because her heart was struggling to keep her body oxygenated and functioning properly. With support she could stand for brief periods, but only with support. At least with Natsu, she could put her faith in his hold that he’d never let her fall.

After adjusting the foot plates and making sure Lucy was comfortable, Natsu takes off towards the cafeteria two floors down. He’d already alerted dining when he’d gone out for the chair they were coming down, to prepare a meal within Lucy’s dietary needs. It wasn’t a terribly restrictive diet, but there were some limits, such as no stimulants like caffeine, or anything with a high fat content.

Natsu loved these little dates as he called them. On warm sunny days it may include a stroll outside for some fresh air, or if it was cold and rainy, merely sharing a cup of light hot chocolate in the visitor's lounge in front of the massive floor to ceiling windows. But if Lucy wasn’t feeling well, he was content to sit by her side in her room, talking, telling stories, or doing anything just to cheer her up. Sometimes he would fantasize during these events as if they were simply at home and relaxing like a normal couple.

“Oh yay, beef barley,” Lucy stirs and lifts a spoonful up before letting it flow back into the bowl. “My fave.” She knew why they gave it to her, but that didn’t make it anymore appetizing. Barley was supposedly good for heart health, and the protein it contained was useful for her body. She crunches up the soda crackers the meal came with and drops them into the soup, letting the pieces soak in.

“I don’t mind it,” Natsu shovels a spoonful into his mouth. He always made it a point to eat the same thing they gave Lucy, so she felt more normal about it. “But if you really don’t want it, I could ask them to make you a sandwich instead.”

“No, no,” she waves her hand, her voice oozing with a sense of longing mixed with frustration, “it’s okay, I’m fine with it. I just would kill to eat a fatty, tasty, slathered in sauce cheeseburger with a side of waffle fries or something you know.”

Natsu snorts a laugh and almost chokes on his food as a mental picture of Lucy chomping down on a burger, with sauce dripping down her chin both amuses and arouses him. “I-I can imagine,” he bangs his chest a couple times to dislodge some liquid that made it down the wrong pipe. “Throw some sriracha sauce on that vision and you just named one of my favorite foods.” Could this woman become any more of his dream girl?!

She giggles, “So, um…” Lucy hesitates for a second. She didn’t want to sound desperate or anything, but loneliness was the quickest way to send her back into a depression and she cherished the time the man spent with her. “How much time are you spending with me today?”

“As long as you’d like,” he winks. “I always do my rounds first and come to you last so I can stay as long as I want to.”

Ugh! The flirty thing again! Lucy wills her body to behave. “Wow, that makes me pretty special, huh?”

“Extremely,” he leans in, letting his gaze grow half-lidded, and his tone mellowing into a soothing cadence. “I’m gonna steal your heart one day Luce, that’s a promise.”

“What?! Pfft,” damn, she can feel the heat rising in her cheeks, “there’s no point in stealing a broken heart sir…” Despite the desire to feel aroused over his comment, it also brought a sense of sadness to her she fought down the urge to let tears rise to the surface. ‘He’s just teasing… he’s just being sweet, trying to make me feel normal… It’s not real Lucy, It’s not real!’ But oh, how she wished it was! Natsu was the perfect man that any woman would kill for. Sweet, strong, handsome, silly, she could go on and on with the list. He was the one ray of sunshine in her dreary world now that she truly was all alone in it. The stress of caring for her had driven her father into his own massive heart attack last year. She had no one, except Natsu.

“I mean it Luce,” he reaches out and takes her hand, letting his thumb sweep over the skin. “Broken or not, I want to steal it and have the person it’s attached to a—ll to myself.”

“Please don’t,” Lucy pulls her hand back. She could feel the tears pooling and if she didn’t stop it now, they’d soon fall. “You know I appreciate it, really I do Natsu.” Lucy looks back up at him and cracks a pained smile. “But you deserve someone who’s not broken.”

The absolute pain measured in Lucy’s eyes, and the sorrow in her voice was like a dagger straight through Natsu’s soul. He could understand her desire of not wanting to believe in miracles or to shield herself from further pain, but that only killed him more. She deserved so much more out of life. Ugh, if only he had a direct line to destiny so he could kick its ass and tell it to leave Lucy in peace! He didn’t want to upset her anymore. “Okay, I’ll stop pushing too hard. But I promise you Luce, one day you will walk out of this hospital a healthy woman, and you can steal my heart instead.”

She sighs, “You can’t promise something like that.”

“I have faith,” Natsu gives her his wide, ear-to-ear grin and a wink. “You’ll see.”

How could she stay upset after seeing that smile of his? That damn ear-to-ear grin that lit up his eyes. The eternal optimist, Natsu Dragneel trying so hard to keep her spirits up. He and that smile may very well be the one thing keeping her going at this point. “Okay, okay,” Lucy chuckles, “I give up, yes it's possible.”

“Woo Hoo!” He pumps his fist in the air in an exaggerated victory, “that’s the spirit! Now eat, so we can go check out the babies!”

Lucy laughs again and nods with a smile, “okay.”

It was harder than she let on to him because she knew how much he enjoyed checking out all the new arrivals, but seeing those babies coming into this world while she would be leaving it shortly was painful. All those hopeful, bright little lives…. They were a bittersweet reminder that a hospital holds two balances; the power to bring life into this world or take it away by not being able to heal a person. She didn’t blame the doctors, for they were doing their best, because sometimes the sands of time runs its course and there is just nothing more they can do. It was simply a part of life, to be born and die, never knowing when the grim reaper would come calling.

“Look, look! I was told three were born yesterday.” Natsu points excitedly as he parks her chair in front of the viewing window of the nursery. He plasters his face against the clear glass. “Two girls and one boy. Awww, one already has some hair!” Turning back to Lucy, “can you see okay, would you like me to help you stand up?”

“Thank you for the offer, but I can see just fine,” Lucy throws on a smile for effect. “They are quite adorable, aren’t they?”

“Are you sure? You know the doctors want you to stand sometimes so that your legs don’t atrophy as quickly. I will gladly bear the weight.”

“Are you saying I’m heavy?!” She was just teasing, but it was the perfect setup to do so.

“What?!” he waves his arms, “n-no way! You’re not heavy, I meant I’m stronger so I can hold you up…”

“So, I’m weak?”

“Wait, what, no!”

Lucy giggles at how much the man was stepping all over his tongue. “I’m just teasing you, Natsu. I know I should, but I’m just a little tired today.” That was partially true.

The man pouts, “so mean Luce,” he whines and throws on the saddest puppy dog expression he can muster, even a sniffle for effect. “But it was an excuse to hold you in my arms.”

Oh, how quickly the tides can turn as his bold little statement sets her face ablaze. He re—ally needed to stop with the flirting, or she was about to have an actual heart attack! “All right,” Lucy groans, “just for a few minutes.” It wasn’t the first time she’s allowed him to help her stand and maintain her balance, but before his little retort, she’d never thought twice about it.

Natsu locks the chair and adjusts the foot plates out of the way so that Lucy can put her feet on the ground. “Just take all the time you need,” his voice grows soft and soothing, “don’t rush.”

She tests her leg strength by pushing with the balls of her feet against the floor, rocking them and applying pressure to warm up the muscles. Brief movements, like getting from the bed to the wheelchair were one thing, standing for a few minutes or walking a few feet were another. It was frustrating and embarrassing, so she avoided it as much as possible, like when going to the bathroom. Lucy didn’t mind when the nurses assisted her with that compromising predicament, but this was embarrassing in a different way.

Once she feels her legs are ready, she holds out her hand which Natsu quickly takes hold of and braces her other on the arm of the chair to push herself up. When she gets to a standing position, Natsu moves around her body, placing an arm around her waist as he gently guides her the two feet to the window. He stays on constant alert, monitoring any change so if her legs decide to buckle, he can catch her. As soon as she reaches the window, Lucy places her hands on the slight ledge of the sill. Natsu then switches his position to stand directly behind her, wrapping both arms around her upper chest to hold her close, but above the tubes in her lower abdomen.

Could he feel how much her body was heating up from the intimate contact? Lucy fought her own emotions to keep from escalating and stressing her heart out, for she was keenly aware of how they would look to anyone passing by. Dear heavens, it was hard to do with his chest pressed up against her back…. She wished they could stay like that forever. ‘Breathe… just breathe, Lucy…. Look at the babies, just focus on the babies…’ That only made it worse.

The babies…. Just a day old. The little angels were like moldable clay. They’ll grow… they’ll change… Will they become teachers or astronauts some day? Oh, look at the one, smiling in his sleep, how precious. Someday, will they make their dreams come true? What will they be like? Good little kids or naughty, friendly, the life of the party or a shy introvert? Like many young girls who dreamt of becoming a mother someday, Lucy had envisioned having a family of her own with the love of her life and the white picket fence. A little girls fantasy. She closes her eyes, praying that Natsu wasn’t paying attention to her. The tears pool behind her eyelids and she stills the desire to sniffle. That fantasy was now dashed like a shipwreck against the shoreline, never to sail the seven seas again. Natsu would have made the perfect husband and father for such a fairytale, and he will one day, just not in her storybook ending.

She’d been so focused on fighting back her emotions, that Lucy hadn’t noticed Natsu’s head was now resting against her shoulder or how his face was curled against the nape.

“It’s okay to cry sometimes Luce.”

His whispered voice, so close to her ear, breaks the dam. Lucy squeezes her eyes tighter and fingertips curl, tensing against the windowsill. Shit, he knew all along. Her knees tremble as the tears flow freely, but she feels his hold tighten around her to keep her from falling. It had been some time since she’d allowed herself to release the pain in this way.

Natsu hadn’t been certain of it until now, but in the last several times they’d come to the pediatric ward, he’d sensed a change in Lucy’s energy. She always wore a smile with a hidden agenda and now he’s confirmed his suspicions. Well, it was his mother really that pointed it out one day when he’d mentioned it to her. The woman was great at understanding human emotions and after years of caring for patients, she’s learned to follow her intuition.

“Lucy was a young woman who may not live to be a mother or have a family of her own, of course it might upset her to see the infants.” His first inclination was to stop bringing the woman to this ward, but his mother gave him a second option. “Help her grieve.” Those three words coming out of his mother’s mouth stunned him briefly. What did she mean to help her grieve?!! “If Lucy has no one to turn to, how can she process what is happening to her. Show her it’s okay to be upset, help her let out the pain before it consumes her.”

“I will hold you for as long as I need to Luce, just let the pain go.”

But it was killing him to do this! Natsu had told his mother that he didn’t think he was strong enough. The woman simply smiled, patted his cheek and said, “I believe in you son. If you truly care, then you’ll have the strength to move mountains for her.” Damn his mother and her intuition, though Natsu realized only a fool couldn’t see how much he was falling for Lucy. He’d sell his soul to a demon to get her a new heart.

Strangely, Lucy’s body wasn’t reacting like she thought it would. Stress usually caused her blood pressure to rise and strain her heart muscles, but that wasn’t happening. She couldn’t stop the tears from flowing like a broken spigot, and maybe that was the best thing, like a release of the pressure that had built up unbeknownst to her. Her hands move from the windowsill to Natsu’s arms, clutching to and resting her head on them. Lucy couldn’t look up, not yet, but she needed to let him know she heard his words, and they meant the world to her.

She would have made an amazing mother, Natsu was sure of it, and it would be a lie to say he’s never thought of or imagined them staring through this viewing window at their own little boy or girl one day. Would the child have Lucy’s beautiful golden waves or chocolate brown eyes? Or maybe take Natsu’s salmon pink hair and onyx eyes. No matter what, the child would be perfect and loved. A child that as the day ticked down on the transplant list was losing hope of ever being born. Crap! Natsu squeezes his eyes closed tight. He couldn’t let her see him struggling with this, but damn if those images didn’t just cut him deep.

Neither of them knew how long they were standing there or even if any of the other hospital staff had noticed. They were in their own little world while time passed them by. It was Lucy who finally let out a small exhale as a last release of all that had struck her today, and with that tension gone, the tears turned into exhaustion. Ever cry so hard and for so long that your body became lethargic? Lucy yawns wide and deep, her eyes growing heavy and clouded, a little lightheaded, ready to go to sleep.

Natsu kisses the crown of her head and without a word, maneuvers her so she can sit back down in her wheelchair. He sets the foot panels in place and helps her feet onto them, then pushes her back to her room. There is a companionable silence, as if all their wordless exchanges had communicated volumes that needed no explanation. Once back in her own room, Natsu helps her onto the bed and set the wheelchair aside.

After helping to re-attach her heart monitors, Natsu checks, “is there anything else I can get you before I go?” She shakes her head. “In that case…”

Lucy motions for him to lean in closer and once he’s close enough, she hesitates briefly then places a kiss on his cheek. “Thank you for everything Natsu.”

His eyes widen, shocked by what she’d just done. “Luce?”

“I just felt like doing it,” she blushes. “Tonight… I don’t know, I just feel so much better and it’s all because of you.” Lucy closes her eyes as a yawn cuts through. They were so tired…

“You are very welcome,” Natsu smiles. He moves to leave, but Lucy grabs his hand and squeezes. When he turns back to look, her eyes are still closed, and there is a slight smile on her face which brings a swelling of his pride. He leans down and kisses the back of her hand. “Rest now, and I will see you again tomorrow.”

Mister Sandman beckoned to Lucy of mystical creatures bathed in glittering stars, calling upon father time to bring peace to a weary soul. She didn’t know why, but though the pull was strong, she fought his dreamy reverie. Today had been the most emotionally charged day in a long time. All the tears Lucy had shed brought a new peace to her spirit, something in this entire experience not even a trained therapist could have given her. The amount of love that Natsu provided, whether platonic or wishful yearnings, calmed her, and pushed away the emptiness she had felt for so long…. So long stuck in this pain. She wanted to relive this day forever, safe in Natsu’s arms, drowning in the pool of his obsidian hues. ‘… to steal his heart…’ Lucy knew she already had, just as he had stolen hers in a way. A sense of warmth floods through her body, shielding her to the cool air-conditioned room. Lucy’s smile widens as her mind slips into the abyss of dreams, of a pink-haired prince who’d finally set her soul free.

“Natsu wake up,” the voice repeats as the person attached to it shakes his sleeping form. “Natsu wake up.”

“Huh?” His clouded mind hears the voice of his mother. “What is it?” He turns his head, his eyes temporarily pin-pointed from the harsh lamp light next to his bed. “Mom, what are you doing in my room?” Natsu pushes himself to a sitting position as his mother takes a seat next to him. With his vision focusing better, he finally notices the moisture clouding his mother’s eyes. “Mom, what is it?!”

She takes his hand, squeezing it tightly with her head slightly lowered in pain. “I-I’m sorry, son, but the hospital just called me…. Your friend, s-she had a massive heart attack.”

By the time his mother had finished the sentence, Natsu had stopped listening to anything she was saying. He knew, the moment she’d said I’m sorry… to wake him up in the middle of the night, it had to be…. All the blood drains from his face and his shoulders slump. He felt dizzy, weak, like all of his strength were stripped away, leaving him an empty shell. He turns his head slowly, the tears already flowing down his cheeks in an endless trickle to meet the woman’s sullen gaze. This wasn’t happening! Not yet! Lucy was fine today! Fine!! He wanted to scream! But his throat was closed up, choking back the sobs that wanted to break free.

“Oh honey,” the woman wraps her arms around her son and pulls him tightly against her chest. “I’m so sorry,” her own tears flowing freely and hitting his face. “Don’t give up hope, they were able to save her, but she’s been placed in a medically induced coma.”

It couldn’t be true! Why weren’t his cries coming out?! Natsu’s voice refused to make a sound and all he could do was weep. It hurt so much! His fists clench at his stiffened sides. This wasn’t fair!

“Let it out son, don’t hold it in,” she coos, doing her best to soothe the pain. “They believe she didn’t suffer because it happened while she was asleep, that should give you a bit of comfort.”

No, it doesn’t! She was still in a coma! He’d almost lost her! And, “I-I never g-got to s-say good... good…” he couldn’t finish it. What if she never woke up again? Natsu’s heart ached at the thought he may never again hear her beautiful laughter or that silly snort she would sometimes make when he teased her. This world was too cruel to do this to a woman who should be in college, starting the next stage of her life. A fit of sobs racks his body, ‘I never got to tell her I love her…’

“Would you like me to drive you there, son?”

“Yes, please mom, i-if you don’t mind.”

“Of course.”

Natsu paused in front of the closed door to Lucy’s new room, unsuccessfully preparing himself for what he knew he would find behind it. On the way to the hospital, his mother had filled in a few more details that tore the man up and brought a wave of guilt flooding over him. Had he caused the heart attack?

The heart monitor alarms had gone off only 30 minutes after he had left her for the evening, and the doctors wasted no time in implementing emergency resuscitative efforts. They deemed it a miracle, but after 10 minutes of herculean efforts they were able to get her heart restarted. Lucy was then moved to the ICU unit and placed on other machines such as a feeding tube and ventilator to keep her alive.

Maybe he shouldn’t have pushed her to see the infants after all. Maybe the crying had stressed her out and neither of them had known it. She seemed perfectly fine when he’d left! Happy, in fact, happier than he’d seen in a long time. Natsu’s fingers absentmindedly trail over the area she had kissed. Lucy was at peace when he’d left. His mom told him her sudden fatigue may have been a sign. Or maybe he clenches his jaw, that kiss was her way of saying goodbye, like she knew something might happen once she’d closed her eyes. The way she’d grabbed his hand when he tried to leave…. “Fuck!” he grits outs as the tears pool in his bloodshot eyes again. “I shouldn’t have left her…”

He pushes the door open and his knees buckle instantly at the sight. Tubes… all the tubes, and monitors, the beeping and lights, bright flashing lights of the stat graphs, subcutaneous fluids hooked to her arms, the drips… slow drips of liquid and medicine flowing into Lucy’s body. He wasn’t ready for it. Her beautiful face partially hidden by the feeding tube running into her mouth and the breathing tubes entering her nostrils. If it wasn’t for his mother standing at his side, Natsu would have collapsed to the floor when his legs lose all their strength and crumple. The woman guides him to a chair placed beside the bed.

“Oh god, Lucy!” The tears pour out and sobs take control of his body. He throws his upper body over hers, clutching desperately to the blanket covering her, and burying his face into its folds. Natsu felt a part of his soul die right then and there. “You don’t deserve this,” his muffled words stolen by the fabric. Why couldn’t they find her a heart?!

“Son,” Natsu feels his mother’s hand resting on his shoulder, but he doesn’t respond. “Son, there’s no telling how long Lucy will stay in this state, so it’s best you say your goodbyes now. They say that people can hear you even if they are in a coma.”

But all he can do is shake his head fervently, denying it to the world and himself that Lucy wouldn’t come out of this. He had hope, damn it! Natsu refused to say goodbye because that meant he’d given up hope Lucy would recover somehow.

The woman seemed to understand her son’s frustration and didn’t push. “Then, just talk to her son, let her know you’re here.”

“Mom, could you… I wanna be alone, please?”

“I’ll come back in an hour to take you home.”

Natsu just nods in response. He hears the door open and close, the click of the lock like the final latch being set on a coffin, sealing them to their fate. He’d known the dangers of giving his heart to Lucy and yet despite what was happening, still had no regrets. She deserved the peace of knowing someone loved her, and if this really was the last moments, Natsu could have that tiny measure of satisfaction knowing he was the one who had provided it to her.

“But you’re not gonna die yet, Luce. You can’t, do you hear me, you can’t! It’s not your time yet, so you need to fight for me please…” Oh, how his heart was shattering into a million pieces as if he was the one with the problem. It fucking hurt! Emotional daggers stabbing him in the chest repeatedly. “You’re stronger than this, Lucy! I know it, you’re gonna wake up from this!”

By the time his mother returns an hour later, the sheer exhaustion had consumed Natsu. She finds him passed out, and it takes a bit of begrudging effort to get him to leave Lucy’s bedside. He was so afraid to leave again in case she passed away, because he didn’t want her to die alone. It was his mother that coaxed him into believing that she wasn’t alone as long as he kept her in his heart.

Day after day, week after week, became a never-ending cycle of zombiesque activity. Natsu’s body was there, trudging through routine, but his mind was broken, battling between keeping hope alive and giving up. He went to work, did his job, then headed to the hospital. It got to where the staff had placed a spare bed in the room, and he practically lived in the ICU with Lucy. He was lucky that his mother was a long-time nurse and he a volunteer with an impeccable standing that the hospital allowed him to bend the visitor hour rules. They knew the woman was alone in this world, so maybe they also felt a sense of duty to become that family for her, because nobody deserved to die alone.

He grew obsessed with anything to do with her condition and used the lonely hours to scour the internet for information. Sure, much of the stories about coma patients being able to hear weren’t really solid or verifiable, but any glimmer of possibilities was worth the effort. It couldn’t hurt to try. Whether it was telling her about his day or what was happening in their town, Natsu would keep talking. He bought a kindle and read stories he thought she would like, fantasies of princes saving princesses filled with mythical creatures. He remembered her saying she used to write such stories and wished he had been able to read them.

When he was too tired to read, or his throat was too sore to continue, Natsu wrote her letters. The staff and his family were getting worried about Natsu. So, the hospital’s mental health service counselor had come in one day and spoke to him on the off chance that they could get through to him. While he refused to listen to most of the advice, he found the writing to be helpful. Maybe when Lucy awakens, she could read them. But for now, it was one way he could pour out some of his thoughts in silence.

He was always tired and exhausted, pushing himself through this day-to-day routine, sometimes forgetting to eat. Concerned staff would often pop their heads in to check on him to make sure he had or scolded him when the hours grew late and they knew he needed to work the next day. His bloodshot eyes held dark bags under them, and his mother swore he was losing weight. But he would always push them off saying he was fine.

“No, you are not son. As a mother I am supremely proud to know I raised a son who cares this much, but I don’t want to lose you too.”

“And you’re not, I’m perfectly healthy.”

“You know as well as I stress is harmful to the body.”

Natsu sighs and runs a hand over his face, “mom, I’m fine, I even cut back on work hours to make you happy.”

“And I appreciate the gesture, but you’re still working, just here!”

“Mom, I’m fine! Please, just leave me be, I-I don’t want to fight. I just want… I’m not leaving her. End of discussion.”

His mother sighs, knowing that her stubborn boy would not listen. “Just please, Natsu, eat more, get more sleep, do it for me.”

“Okay, okay, I will.”

“I love you, son.”

“I love you too, mom.”

She kisses his forehead and turns to leave, taking one last look at her boy, and to Lucy. Grandeeney Dragneel pauses with a bittersweet smile as Natsu resumed reading quietly from his Kindle. Somehow, she knew that young girl loved her son back, and it broke her heart to know they were like those star-crossed lovers from a long-lost folktale, never destined to truly be together. She liked Lucy. The girl was smart and sweet, very articulate whenever she visited during her rounds, and her strength through this all was remarkable. Even after being dealt such a cruel hand by fate, she never grew bitter or resentful. Her son couldn’t have fallen for a better girl. Grandeeney slips away quietly before the moisture building in her eyes could be seen by Natsu, bracing against the closed door, and praying for a miracle.

Is this that tunnel people talk about? Lucy wonders as all she could see through her eyelids is the brightest light that seemed just too brilliant to be normal. Her eyes hurt a little from it, but if this was heaven, why is there still pain? She forces her lids open and tries to shield them with her hand that… doesn’t seem to move, huh? But it wasn’t just her arm, her entire body felt heavy. The images filtering in through her vision were blurry, slowly gaining focus as her pupils adjust to the light to see, wait, ceiling tiles? Why does heaven look so much like a hospital?

“Oh good, you’re awake.”

Lucy looks over and sees a doctor standing beside her. “Where am I?” Or more like why am I here?

“Do you remember the heart attack?” She shakes her head. “You’ve been in a coma for two months after you suffered a massive heart attack. But luckily, a local donor came through...” He goes on to explain about the surgery telling her that the transplant surgery went well, her body was accepting the new heart, and while she’ll still be going through three to six months or rehabilitation and monitoring, she was on track to make a full recovery.

“Oh-okay, thank you so much, doctor.” It was a miracle to be alive again with a new heart. But something felt wrong, missing?

“I’ll be back in a couple hours to check on you again Ms. Heartfilia, but if anything feels off in the meantime, be sure to ring the nurses.” He moves to leave, but she stops him.

“Doctor, the donor, can you tell me about them, please?”

The man hesitates for a moment. “Well Ms. Heartfilia, privacy laws don’t allow me to….”

“You don’t have to tell me their name or anything. Please, just a little information. I’d like to know who saved my life.”

The man sighs and takes the seat next to the bed, clearly torn with what he was about to say. “He was a young volunteer at the hospital who tragically fell asleep at the wheel and passed away from a car accident…”

The doctor's voice droned on for another minute as he tried to reassure her that the man didn’t suffer. It was quick and painless from a one-car crash. As if that was supposed to make her feel any better. Lucy didn’t need to be told the name as tears poured down her cheeks, because she knew. She just knew. That was what was missing, for she knew that if she’d had received the new heart, Natsu would have been the one by her side when she’d woken up… unless he could be there. With all the wires attached to her arm, she could barely move them without the sting of the I.V. lines, but she didn’t care. Lucy’s hands cover her lowered face as the tears continue to stream.

“I’m very sorry, Ms. Heartfilia. Would you like me to have someone from mental health support to come see you?”

Lucy shakes her head. She couldn’t speak, she couldn’t even think.

“Mrs. Dragneel would also like to speak to you when you’re up to it.”

More tears and sobs choke out. Oh god that was Natsu’s mom, how could she face Natsu’s mother!

Seeing the woman’s distress, the man nods and squeezes her shoulder, “Again, I’m truly sorry Ms. Heartfilia. We all miss him very much. Please try to get some rest,” and leaves the woman to grieve in her own way.

Her head was spinning. It wasn’t supposed to happen like this! Why was destiny such a malicious bastard to take away the one person she had and leave her in this world all alone? Lucy clasps a hand over her chest, recalling the last conversation, that last night with Natsu. She squeezes her eyes to the pain of the memories… He’d made her so happy… so very happy, and yes, she remembered thinking for the first time since her diagnosis; she didn’t feel alone anymore. Fuck if she didn’t want to just keel over again, but that would mar the beautiful gift that she’s received. Natsu believed with every fiber of his being that she would walk out of here one day and she will live on for him, that’s a promise. “Our heart,” Lucy breathes out… But how ironic that he was right all along. She really did steal his heart in the cruelest of ways…

#nalu #nalu angst #nalu au #natsu dragneel #Lucy heartfilia #fairytail #nalu fan fic #nalu fan fiction #bittersweet ending #story request #uzumaki2810 #natsu x lucy #au modern setting #hospital setting

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uwumessenger · 4 years

Note

I couldn't help but notice your azula pfp! If you watched ATLA can you do hc's or something for the om brothers + diavolo for what nation they'd be and if they can bend and stuff? :0

haha yes i love atla! i think i got carried away doing this one too B)

also this took me FOREVER (kinda) so sorry about that hehe i kinda ended up disregarding the fact that they are literally demons and that they’re all brothers so it’s kinda chaotic??? let’s just pretend that this is an om!avatar au idk skdjnjksdnk

none of the brothers are the avatar but id like to think solomon is and i have nothing to backup that statement but he is for the sake of this post i was gonna make it mc but nah picturing solomon is funnier

Lucifer

a master firebender brah

powerful and similar to azula except he’s more mentally stable so he doesnt lash out or break down like she did at the end of the series

if challenged to an agni kai he’d attack the opponent emotionally then burn them when they’re at their most vulnerable

a literal psychopath but hey we still love the guy

solomon’s firebending teacher

Mammon

from fire nation and can bend similarly to zUKo ¿?

if you combined s3 zuko, sokka, and momo into one person in this au it would be mammon

short tempered and challenges lucifer to an agni kai all the time (but it never actually happens they’d at the most just spar)

acts with asmo at the ember island theater sometimes

and bets on asmo’s pai sho games with satan/levi

diavolo loves him here yes even more than lucifer

burn mark on the back of his left shoulder bc of an agni kai with belphie :0

Levi

can’t bend but is from a water tribe

idk i just get sokka vibes from him

so he is the most skilled swordsman in all the land

stays away from drama/conflict unless he is directly affected

always playing pai sho, usually with satan or asmo

unfortunately never wins a game against them

he also enjoys making up his own games to play and keep himself occupied and shares them with the kids in his water tribe

helps solomon find a waterbender master yeyeet

Satan

an air nomad

mai but make her a man and an airbender

also VERY knowledgeable and uses his air bison to travel all over

bff’s with wan shi tong and spends a lot of time in his library

enjoys playing pai sho with levi and asmo, and is apart of the white lotus

teaches solomon airbending as long as solomon teaches him about his past avatar lives in return

has lots of inventions and often shares them with the others

loves going to the festivals held by all the different kingdoms and will disguise himself (even if he doesnt need to)

Asmo

ah yes another fire nation citizen

the ty lee of the gang

he can bend but he chooses not to so he does all the pressure point stuff instead

only time you’ll really ever see him bend is if he does a show at an event

lives on ember island and doesnt really make an effort to travel elsewhere

so only plays pai sho when either satan or levi visit him

has chronic back pain from carrying all the plays at ember island theater

hes actually really wise and will give solomon good advice when he needs it most

Beel

an earth kingdom kinda guy

iroh and kyoshi vibes (but mostly iroh)

oHMYG OSH YOU GUYS KNOW THE TALE OF IROH IN THE EPISODE “TALES OF BA SING SE” ;;;;wow imagine that but him with lilith i think im crying???

lava bends bc hes cool like that

would definitely be apart of the white lotus

helps steer belphie into the right direction when they cross paths

solomon’s earthbending teacher

opens a cafe in ba sing se and has the best food in the entire world

barbatos works for him

may have eaten a rock or two before

Belphie

fire bender and can do combustion bending omfg

has been in both fire and earth kingdom jail a couple of times

challenged mammon to an agni kai and won but we dont talk about that

it pissed diavolo off so he was dun dun DUN banished!!! uhoh!!1!1!!

but lucifer helps him find shelter

so he shares similar internal conflicts to the ones zuko had

went into a coma bc he did one good thing instead of something malicious

eventually turns good and is let back into the fire nation without any hurt feelings yay

Diavolo

firelord ozai but make him a good person

kinda like the earth king but with a functioning brain

very fun to be around but also powerful so do not fuck with him and his loved ones

pranked lucifer and the entire fire nation once by challenging lucifer to an agni kai and didn’t reveal that it was a prank until the fight was nearly over

everyone hated him for wasting their time but it was entertaining

enjoys tea with beel as they watch levi get his ass handed to him by satan (and later by asmo) in pai sho

Solomon

no one asked for this but

hes a pretty cool avatar

originally from the fire nation so is lowkey influenced by diavolo’s chaotic energy

hes actually good at keeping balance, peace, and order !!

study sessions with satan at wan shi tong’s library

never really insecure or overthinks his role, hes kinda like how kyoshi was

he unites all of the characters and is the reason why they all end up being friends

the end

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milfisolde · 4 years

Text

under read more bc i put too much effort into my ocs and there is A Lot. tw for violent stuff

this will be updated every time i think of something for him!

deviantart link

Rollick

“The Ravenous” ? idk I suck at titles

no accessories

Size reference

why does he have anime hair if hes a fish? because he’s my oc and i say so

I MADE ICONS FOR THE LOCATIONS AND CLASS AND OTHER CHAMPIONS’ ABILITIES AND TUMBLR WONT’T LET ME ADD THEM WITHOUT FUCKING THE WHOLE POST UP

Short crappy bio

A young shark-like Vastaya. Born in Ionia, west of the island Sudaro. He was captured as a child by Bilgewater pirates after straying too close to the surface and being found. Was then put to work on the Slaughter Docks, and trained to hunt in the traditional Serpent Isles manner: “launching themselves at their targets to secure tow-hooks with their bare hands, and beginning to butcher the creatures while they yet lived.”.

I need to update myself on League lore, but I would like him 2 be acquaintances with Nami and Fizz. Also, Rollick would have heard stories about Pyke and would find him really cool. Ideally, he would have Johnny Yong Bosch as his voice actor because I love how he voiced Kung Jin in Mortal Kombat X, but I don’t know how he’d do with a pirate accent lmao.

Kit

Would be classed as a Fighter with the sub-class Diver. At least I think he would.

His kit is basically just a mash-up of multiple champions with extra ingredients. Riot do it themselves, so I'm allowed to, too. Pirate lingo used for most of his abilities and voice lines b/c I'm not creative for naming things.

Passive "Blow the Man Down." : A mash-up of Rengar and Darius' but more complicated. Auto-attacking 3 times in a row, or using abilities, gives his unused abilities 3 different tiers of empowerment. (Like, if you auto-attack 3 times, use W, then Q, his E will have tier 3 empowerment.). Tiers 2 and 3 gives the target bleed when hit by abilities, applying "Blood in the Water." Applying the bleed multiple times makes it stack, tier 2 stacks like two stacks of tier 1 bleed, tier 3 stacks like two stacks of tier 2 bleed. How many times can it stack? Idk. 5? 7? 10?? ok probably not 10 that would be stupid.

2nd passive "Clipper." : Rollick moves faster in the river; this move speed scales with his normal move speed.

Q "Feed the Fish." : Tier 1 is a swipe in an AOE cone with his claws. Tier 2 is a small lunge in a targeted direction with two swipes, one with each hand. Tier 3 is a longer distance lunge with a bite. If tier 3 lands on a moving target (examples: scuttlecrab when it dashes, Ezreal using his E), it will follow the target like Warwick Q/Evelynn E. The bite will also heal him for a small amount.

W "Hook, Line, Sinker." : is like Rengar's Bola Strike with a wider but shorter range for tiers 1 and 2, but he leaps in the targeted direction at tier 3 and if he hits something, covers it with his net and stays on top of them for a short amount of time. Tier 2 spins the target around from they way Rollick throws his net and will turn the opposite direction of the way the target was originally standing. If you're facing Rollick and the tier 2 net hits you, your back is now turned to Rollick.

E "Chase." : Warwick Blood Hunt but either less or more annoying. Cooldown is shorter in duration, but so is its active. The passive part of it only shows paths to champions affected with a bleed, burn or poison DOT effect. (Includes: Rollick's "Blood in the Water", Darius' "Hemorrhage", Brand's "Blaze", Gangplank's "Trial by Fire", Lillia's "Dream Dust", Cassiopeia's "Noxious Poison" and "Debilitating Poison", Twitch's "Deadly Venom", Teemo's "Toxic Shot" and "Noxious Trap", Singed's "Poison Trail", the "Scorch" rune, "Ignite" summoner spell, "Challenging Smite" summoner spell, "Azakana Gaze" from Demonic Embrace, and "Torment" from Liandry's Anguish.

R "Cleave 'Em to the Brisket!" : Similar to Skarner's "Impale". Rollick takes the hooked blade he has on his belt and lunges at the target, stabbing into the enemy champion's chest with his chest to their back, and drags them away. "Cleave 'Em to the Brisket!" can only be used on a champion that has their back turned towards Rollick. It applies a tier 3 "Blood in the Water." upon use. It can yank champions out of Displacement Immunity, but doesn't suppress the target champion entirely, they are still able to use dash and blink abilities, use Thresh's "Dark Passage", recast "Death Sentence" , and use most movement summoner spells ( Flash, Hexflash, Mark/Dash), but if they do, half of their current HP is taken away from the hooked knife being dragged/yanked out of them. If you are 30% HP and you use one of the movement abilities mentioned, you will leave with 15% HP and two stacks of tier 3 bleed. For 5 seconds after using his ult, Rollick uses his knife to attack, gaining increased auto-attack range and his autos apply a tier 1 bleed stack per hit. The enhanced auto-attacks drag his targets towards him because of the hook part in his knife getting caught on them.

Animation ideas

(I used google to find every gif/picture, save for the “dance” one. they have tumblr links bc when writing this tumblr shit itself when i wanted to save it as a draft and i kept it open in a different tab and copy/pasted everything. im sorry some of the gifs are weird aslkfjdjf)

Walking animation is him using his arms and tail to "crawl". imagine the gif has a tail instead of legs

Running animation is the same concept, just with much more effort put into making himself move faster. Moving in the river looks more like he’s swimming rather than crawling. Slowed animation is him dragging himself slowly with his head facing the ground, putting weight on his elbows instead of using his arms completely. Like an army crawl but in pain.

Idle animation is him crossing his arms and resting on his elbows, then looking around and inspecting his claws.

If left in idle animation for more than 15 seconds, he drops down completely and puts his head in his arms and dozes off. Moving after the sleep idle will have him shake his head awake when starting to move.

Death animation is him trying to crawl, being unable to, then collapsing on his side and flopping onto his back.

Taunt animation is him straightening himself then lashing out with his hands and baring his teeth before "biting" the air in the direction he’s standing, voice lines coming out before the bite part.

Joke animation is him chasing his own tail? Maybe he gets tangled in his net after doing it for a second and just struggles there until the animation is interrupted.

Dance is uh. He straightens up and does knife tricks. He doesn’t have legs, doesn’t have a staff like Nami, and just wouldn’t dance like Cassiopeia.

I made the gif using footage from here.

His laugh animation would be him laughing and flopping onto his back, then turning back onto his stomach. All but one of his laughs would be loud and hearty, the one that isn’t would sound like Kung Jin’s laugh.

Voice line ideas

First encounters:

Bilgewater/Bilgewater themed champion:

"Ahoy!" "Ahoy, bucko!" "Ahoy, scallywag."

Multiple champions simultaneously/champions who have a visible partner/partners with them (examples: Kindred, Sejuani, Lulu with Pix, Elise with her Spiderlings, Azir with his Sand Soldiers):

"Ahoy, me hearties."

Pyke:

"Pyke?! I’ve heard stories of you! Though… You’re smaller than I had imagined..." "Hey there, old salt! " "Ahoy, seadog! "

Nami:

"Good to see a friendly face! Shame it’s on the wrong side." "Oh! Little lass! Have you found your stone yet? "

Fizz:

"Little trickster! Where’s your big friend? "

Illaoi:

“Test? Gonna get myself an A-plus-plus! …That’s the good grade, right?

Taunts:

Any champion:

"Scurvy dog! " "AAARRRRGGGGHHHH! "

Bird/bird themed/winged champion:

"Polly want a cracker? "

Tahm Kench:

“The only creature with an appetite bigger than mine” “You put me to shame with that maw of yours! You could fit me in it!”

Abilities/eliminations:

Tier 3 "Feed the Fish.":

(after used on champion wearing armour/with tough skin)

"Ouch… I think I broke a tooth. Good thing I got more. "

(after used on champion with fur/feathers/long hair)

" (violent spitting-out-fluff noises) Blegh! "

Tier 1 and 2 "Hook, Line, Sinker. ":

"Catch! " "Avast, ye! "

Tier 2 "Hook, Line, Sinker. " after turning someone around:

"Bring a spring upon ‘er! " "Broadside! "

Using "Chase. " with a DOT’d champion in range:

"Chum in the water…" " (deep inhale, then a rumbling growl) "

Using "Chase. " with affected champion visible:

"Lookin’ a bit squiffy there…" " (laughter) Yesss… "

Eliminate champion:

"Take a caulk. "

Eliminate champion while using "Cleave ‘Em to the Brisket!" or the enhanced auto-attacks after:

"Hah, keelhauled! " “Taste me steel n’ may the devil take ye!”

“PENTAKILL!”:

"Dead men tell no tales…"

Respawn:

"What a flogging…" "Alright, I’ve fed the fish… Now it’s their turn. "

Pings:

(Danger!):

"Heave to! " "Avast ye! "

(Assist me!):

"All hand hoy! " "All hands on deck! "

(Assist me!) followed up by (On my way!), or vice versa:

"Weigh anchor and hoist the mizzen! "

(Area is warded.):

"They’ve got a lookout. "

(Target champion):

"Thar she blows! " "Sail, ho! " "Savvy? " "Hang ‘em from the Yardarm! "

Miscellaneous:

Allied champion drinks potion or gets healed by another ally when Rollick has missing HP:

"Splice the mainbrace! Please?"

Alone with low HP, no potions or actives available, or sells all items:

"Looks like I’m marooned…"

Healed by ally:

"Feeling shipshape!" "Much obliged." "I’m in your debt." "Thank you!" "Thanks!"

Receives shutdown gold:

"Ha-ha! Plundered! " “Bounty taken.”

Flashing away from enemy:

"Blimey! " "Gah!” "Sink me! " " (girly shriek) "

#league of legends #league of legends oc #lol oc #vastaya #vastayan oc #my art #it took me like a week to think of all of this #and write it down/draw it/ collect/make gifs #miki.txt

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darktypeimagines · 5 years

Note

hi there! im a bit new here but i really love your writing a whole lot!! could you maybe possibly do a drabble for piers who has a crush on a fellow musician who makes indie music and also really likes him back and they keep writing songs about eachother until one of them is finally like "oh thats about me" ?

So… uh, I wanted to write actual song verses… but I’m terrible at it, so I spared you the pain of that. I hope you like it, though. 😊 This ended up being slow-burn-y, so sorry if that’s not what you meant.

Definition of a drabble (according to google): “Traditionally, a drabble is a piece of fiction that is exactly 100 words long.” HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! nope. Put it under a read more because it’s much, much longer than my usual posts.

———————————————————————————

It wasn’t often Piers completely and totally fell for someone.

But there was just something captivating about you; the way you carried yourself, the type of music you crafted. The verses clung to him and he caught himself humming the melodies as he went about his day.

He knew he had a problem when he checked his playlist and found he’s listened to one of your songs 50 times in one week. And it was proven when, after catching a glimpse of you at an indie music festival, he felt that familiar electricity overcome him. Head to toe, in his gut, stopping his breath short. But before he could react, you disappeared behind the crowd once more.

He had a problem. He had fallen for someone he had never met. Someone he knew only from sight and song.

Piers ignored the feelings. It was just a crush. It would fade in time.

It did not.

And, what was worse was, without even realizing it, he wrote you into a few poems he jotted down. It was a nighttime habit he had, all the way back from his teenage years. When he was trying to figure out a song, he’d write a poem first, then adapt it.

So, as he laid curled up in bed, Obstagoon cuddled up next to him, he scribbled out his thoughts. The light was dim, as always; he’d put on a lamp, but that’d require waking up his Pokemon. Plus, there was just something about the soft flicker of a half-broken neon sign that felt… right? Probably just nostalgia, growing up in Spikemuth, where everything seemed to be just barely holding on.

As he struggled to read his own scratchings in the unstable light, the realization overcame him. When he started, he wrote vaguely. The poem-turned-song wasn’t supposed to be about anyone specific. But, somehow, someway, his stifled thoughts ended up on paper. And in reading it over, it wasn’t just about you; it was about his feelings for you.

It made him extremely uncomfortable and he didn’t know what to do.

For now, he tucked the notebook away, and finally turned on the light.

Months went by. The two of you kept passing each other by, but never exchanged a single word. While Piers still had feelings for you, they weren’t as suffocating as before. Fortunately for him.

But as he walked through Spikemuth on a chilly autumn day, he heard a familiar voice echo through the metal and concrete alleyways. He could tell he was coming from a radio, probably from inside someone’s house, at full blast. Piers stuck around to listen to the rest of the song in full, feeling increasingly drawn to it as he made out the words. He already missed half of it, but got the gist of the theme: a missed connection, regret for what could have been.

For some reason… He couldn’t shake the feeling it was almost as though the song was describing… him? Was he just imagining it? But then, the music cut to reveal the ending sung as acapella.

And it was you. Your voice. Between feeling that the song was about him, and then suddenly realizing it was your song, he suddenly felt unsteady on his feet. He had the distinct feeling of wanting to run away and run toward the problem at the same time.

He went straight home, and after restlessly trying to figure out what to do, he turned to what he did best: writing music. After several long nights, many hours of lovesick doubt, and one instance of nearly scrapping everything, he finally had something he felt he could release, loosely based on the poem from months before. Normally, it would take far too long for him to work through the all the hoops in order to get it officially released. But, luckily, there was a small concert planned in Spikemuth; he wasn’t originally going to perform, but he could easily change that… Plus, he knew you were already scheduled to perform there.

The night of the concert came. It was rainy, but one of the few benefits of living in Spikemuth was protection from the elements. The rain pattering on the metal above was a familiar sound, but it would soon be drowned out by music.

Despite it being a smaller concert, a few vendors and a food truck showed up. The stalls held both official and unofficial merch, but no one really minded in this city. This wasn’t Wyndon, after all. As the first fan trickled in, picking spots and browsing the pop-up shops, Piers scanned around for you. It seemed like you hadn’t shown up yet.

And, he soon got distracted by his own fans, and wasn’t able to look for you. Before he knew it, the concert was about to begin. He looked up to the stage and his breath hitched as he saw it was you. All he could focus on was you, the spell only tightening its grip as your song began. It was the same one he heard on the radio, but seeing a performance in person is always a different experience.

Time seemed to slow and it was though no one else was around. While he felt the song was about him before, that feeling was magnified now. And finally, at the last line, you made eye contact with him and smiled. With a fluttering heart, he managed to return the smile. That moment, which was likely just that, stretched on longer in his mind. Time snapped back in place, and you exited the stage, where Piers lost sight of you.

His thoughts were cluttered for the rest of the concert. So, when he bought his mic up to the stage and prepared himself, he felt something he hadn’t felt since the very beginning of his music career; nerves. They never really went away, of course, but this was the first time in a long time that he could remember feeling nervous about how people would react. How you would react.

It was a rocky start. He started on the first verses and was a little out of tune. But then he caught a glimpse of you again, all the way in the back, and the words came easily.

He hadn’t meant to stare at you the entire time, but he just couldn’t help it. The song was meant for you, after all.

Overall, the song was an obvious response to yours. Anyone who was paying attention could tell. Similar theming; a lost chance at love. There were even lines that were basically spin offs of yours. But there was one main difference. His song ended on a line that expressed he still had hope they would meet someday. Another chance.

Either it was one of his best songs, or the crowd was super hyped. The cheering continued far after he exited the stage. They were so excited, Piers decided to wait in the musicians’ lobby in an adjacent building rather than rejoining the crowd. It was already an emotional day and he just needed a break. He scrolled through his phone mindlessly, trying to get his mind off of things, but it didn’t help much.

The music quieted, as did the crowd. The last act had finished and it seemed people were heading out. Piers thought about heading home himself, but figured he’d wait just a bit longer. After hearing the door creak, he looked up and stiffened. As what was becoming the usual, your sudden appearance surprised him again.

The two of you stared at each other for a few moments, only the pinging of rain on metal between you.

“Hey… What’re you still here for?” He asked tentatively.

You sat down on the couch beside him. He seemed to tense up. He sat hunched over a bit, fiddling with a black ring on his index finger. He would occasionally glance at you, but not for long.

“You like the concert? I know it wasn’t much, but I hope you liked it.” He paused. “I’m glad you were able to come. Made my day.”

You told him the same, and began gushing about his song. He smiled, holding eye contact with you.

“Yeah, I heard your song on the radio. Took a bit of inspiration an’ made something of my own. Couldn’t help it. What you wrote was just one of those songs that gets you in the heart, you know?”

You knew.

“So…” He sighs, “I s'ppose I may as well ask. Maybe I’m just imagining things, but- you wanna get together? Or at least get to know each other? Dunno if you realized it, but that new song was meant to be about you.”

You had an inkling. But it overjoyed you to hear him say it. He seemed to notice your reaction and grinned. And then, you told him the truth; that YOUR song was also about him!

Piers sat straight up for a moment, then relaxed, still smiling.

“That settles that, then. Guess I was right all along.” He fidgeted a bit with his choker. “So… was that a yes, right?”

Of course it was.

#piers #piers x reader #pokemon #pokemon swsh #pokemon imagines #pokemon sword and shield #x reader #ask #scenario #darktypeimagines

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satanschild01 · 4 years

Text

No All Might? That’s Alright Prt3

Izuku Midoriya Fanfiction

A/N: In all honesty this took me way too long just to finish writing this chapter, but I pushed through so I guess it’s fine. I’ve created a AO3 account recently and I’ve posted all of my previous fanfictions there so if you want to check me out, you can find me as SatansChild

Hope you all stay safe and wear a mask if you can't physically distance.Hope to update soon!

Catch you on the flip side ~ Em

Photo used in this fic was referenced from original picture from anime, I did draw this photo jtlyk

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@random-fandom-girl-24

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Trigger warning: Talk about death

Word Count: 2633

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

After making sure all of the blood was no longer on his uniform, Closing his eyes, Izuku steeled himself to walk into the All Might shrine that was his room. Sure, he still wanted to be a hero, and he admired All Might’s strength, but he couldn’t stand to be surrounded by posters and figurines of a man who couldn’t offer any sort of encouragement to a child who clearly needed it. Izuku pulled some cardboard boxes out from his closet and started filling them with everything All Might. Oboro didn’t make a sound during the time he cleaned out his room, which he was grateful for. Even though he could just feel Oboro wanting to ask questions.

“So what are you going to do about all this stuff?” Oboro asked as Izuku changed his All Might sheets with regular black ones “You seem like such a big fan...it just seems like a waste just to keep it all in boxes.”

Izuku shrugged his shoulders.”I’m not much of a fan anymore.” he lied to mostly himself rather than to Oboro, “I guess I’ll just donate the stuff later.” Once his walls were finally bare, Izuku stuffed the now full boxes to the back of his closet and flopped onto his bed. The room stayed silent for a moment until Izuku broke the ice, “I don’t want to intrude on your personal life…but can you tell me about yourself?” he asked

“Well for the fact that I witnessed and helped you with some pretty deep stuff, it sorta would be rude if I didn’t tell you something about my previous life,” Oboro said cheekily

“H-how long have you been...you know…” Izuku paused not really wanting to complete the question.

“...dead?” Izuku nodded “I was in my second year of high school when I died and I would be 29 by now so...close to 12 years I think?” Izuku sat there on his bed frozen

‘12 years is a long time to be a ghost or spirit to not have passed on, that is if people actually pass onto another place once they die’ Izuku thought to himself

“I was patrolling around Tasomiya Ward with one of my best friends when there was a villain attack...I was working on saving some kids when debris fell on top of me...when I woke up I was like how I am now, I couldn’t find my body anywhere so I just...travelled around…” Oboro seemed to quiet down at mentioning that he never found his body to move onto another life, so Izuku thought of ways to change the current mood of the room.

“So you were a hero in training or something?” he asked, face full of wonder, Oboro hummed in affirmation “What school did you go to?”

“I went to U.A”

“Wait really?!” Izuku exclaimed excitedly, “that's so cool!”

They continued talking and asking questions back and forth, before falling into a comfortable silence. A few minutes past before Izuku took a deep breath

“I...I’m sorry,” Izuku said quietly, slowly curling into himself

"Why would you be sorry kid?" Oboro’s voice was full of confusion. But Izuku only curled in on himself further.

"If it wasn't for me you wouldn't be stuck here." As if anyone wanted to be bound to some stupid Deku...like him. And here he thought it was a whole coincidence that Oboro was with him. But instead, he just took whatever type of freedom he had to begin with.

"Hey, no! Stop that. Izuku that's not true! I'm here because I want to be!" The warmth spread all over him and he couldn't help but lean into it. “I said I'd make a hero out of you and I still plan on it."

Izuku looked up only to see the ceiling of his room, lifting his arm up to the sky and let it just float there (like what every kid does while laying on there bed contemplating on what to do next). "I wish I could see you again."

Oboro hummed. Seeming to think something through. "I don’t think there’s much out there since I was only a second-year when I died, but there could be some photos of me with friends or an article"

Izuku seemed to take that as a challenge as he went to his computer. "What did you choose to be your hero name?"

"Loud Cloud."

After scouring the web for a couple of minutes nothing showed up except for an old article from the Nikkei Shimbun newspaper, reporting the death of hero-in-training Loud Cloud. Izuku quickly exited that site choosing to search for something different. “What’s your full name Oboro?”

“Oh that’s right I didn’t tell you my full name, it is Oboro Shirakumo” Oboro replied

“Oboroshirikumo...oboroshirikumooo….here!” Izuku exclaimed pointing at the monitor’s screen. “This photo was tagged saying ‘Curry eating competition at U.A’s School Festival. Winner Hizashi Yamada from class 2-A!’ it also says the names of the people in the photo are; Shota Aizawa, Hizashi Yamada, and Oboro Shirakumo.”

“Oh, I remember that!” Oboro cried out laughing “The curry was soo spicy I was freaking out because I couldn’t find anything to soothe my burning throat!”

“So that’s you in the back then?” Izuku asked pointing towards a teenager who seems to be freaking out.

Oboro chuckles “Yep, the other two were my best friends!”

“Yamada looks sorta familiar what’s his hero name?” Izukku asked, curious on why the 16-year-old looked so familiar to him

“Unless he changed it before becoming a pro, which he probably would not, his hero name is Present Mic.”

Izuku sputtered “W-wait you were close friends with THE Present Mic?!” Oboro hummed in agreement while Izuku had his miny freak out “

“Oh my god that is socool!Ilistentohisradioshoweveryday,andhe’ssuchanamazinghero,likeevenifheisdeafduetohisquirkhedoesn’tletitbotherhiman-” He stopped hearing the sound of laughter coming around his room and his lamp flickering

"Aw jeez, that’s amazing Hizashi got to get that radio show he wanted." There was a quick blast of warmth flooding around his back and chest resembling a hug. "Well anyway, you should probably head to bed. You have a busy day ahead of you tomorrow and a long way to go before you can have a chance at being accepted into UA!"

"What are you going to do while I sleep?" Izuku asked, eyes slowly drooping.

"I'm going to see how far I can go without being next to you, and have a look around and exploring a bit. No need to worry. I'll make sure to be careful and be here in the morning." He seemed to pick up on his anxieties. Izuku felt warmth as Oboro slowly pet his hair back. "Goodnight, Izuku."

The next morning Izuku woke up to warmth pulsing on his right cheek. "Hey kid it’s time to get up! You have training to do! Up and at ‘em!" Oboro’s voice was overly joyful and Izuku felt very unwilling to get out of bed.

"Mm...just a bit longeeeer." He groaned turning himself over facing away from where he guesses Oboro is standing (floating?).

"Fair warning Izuku my jokes are terrible, everyone at school would always runaway once I started and I haven’t been able to talk to actual people in so long! If spaghetti were to have it’s own action movie, what would it be called?.... Mission im-pasta-ble. What did the pot eat on it’s birthday?....pancakes. What do you call a camel in a drought?....A dry hu- "

Finally, Izuku jerked up, covering his ears. “Okay. Okay, I’m up! No need to finish that.” His face started to burn a light pink across his face, (knowing what the end of the joke was) as he started to kick the blankets off only to turn towards the window and see barely any light outside. "Wha- Oboro!! The sun isn’t even out yet!"

He turned glaring into thin air hoping to make contact with him.

"Yes, it is, Izu. It's just reeeally early in the morning. There is plenty of time for you to get ready and eat before we go out for a morning run!" He was being weirdly energetic about the whole ordeal, but Izuku knew he wouldn't take no for an answer.

Heading to the bathroom, Izuku ran a brush through his wild curly hair and brushed his teeth. Going back to his room, Obroro pipped up. "It's a bit cool outside so I suggest you wear some long sleeves."

The entire way to his closet Izuku muttered incoherent things. In the end, he opted to wear a plain black shorts and a long-sleeved shirt with written kanji saying 'tank-top' with his old dusty sneakers because his red sneakers were still on top of the roof.

Before heading out Izuku ate some toast and an orange. If he got hungry later on their run he could always eat more when they got back. As Izulu started to leave the apartment Izuku tripped over an unmarked box that was just left in front of the door.

"Ooo I wonder what it is!” Oboro seemed quite enthusiastic as Izuku went to open the box revealing his faded red shoes and yellow backpack.

"Wai-how-who found my stuff?" Izuku asked immediately putting the bag by the door and quickly changing between uncomfortable and comfortable shoes.

"I don’t know, when I got back from wandering around the package was just...there."

"Maybe someone found it and found out where I live from my contact info and address was written inside…?” Izuku wondered out loud.

“I guess so,” Oboro said looking to the bright sight of things.

‘But what if it was...All Might. Yeah, I’m glad that I don’t have to go back up there to collect my things but...I don’t want to have to depend on All Might to help me with my own problems.’

“Hey don’t think like that Izu! I know you’re not a huge fan of the guy, but you don’t have to beat yourself down like that. I know you’re better than that” Oboro spoke sternly trying to make a point, but that soon backfired as warmth spread through his body.

“Hold up- could you always hear my thoughts?” Izuku questioned as he started to jog away from the apartment.

“So far I can heat some things. Like your thoughts that way heavily on you emotionally. But it could possibly work to talk to me through your mind. So you don’t look like a freak talking to themselves.” Oboro quickly informs Izuku as to not worry him.

Sighed Izuku. That was true. Though he kept thinking about it as he jogged. As they passed Dagobah Municipal Beach, the sun had started to rise. Taking in a deep breath was the wrong reason as Izuku cringed from the awful smell of garbage. Despite the smell, Izuku took a break, taking a seat at the entrance.

"Oh gross. What is this place?" Oboro asked with a clear sound of disgust in his voice.

"Well," Izuku started."This is Dagobah Municipal Beach Park. It has accumulated trash coming from the sea for years, turning it from a beautiful beach spot into a trash heap for everyone's unwanted or broken belongings." It was really a shame. As a kid, Izuku recalled going to the beach. Lie under a beach umbrella, making sandcastles. But by the time he was tall enough into the water, it was already flooded with trash by then.

"That's terrible." Oboro seemed deeply upset about this actually. It made Izuku want to do something about it. But before Izuku could voice his thoughts Oboro spoke up.

“Hey Izu, could we make a quick visit to a convenience store?”

“Sure...what exactly do you want me to get?” Izuku asked, despite having an idea what Oboro was thinking.

“Well...you’re going to need to get some garbage bags and some gloves.”

Izuku then dashed towards the nearest convenience store with determination in his eyes. A frail-looking lady turned the key to open the doors as he walked by. Causing her to recoil in slight shock, Izuku realized that with his rapid approach he had frightened her. "I'm sorry, ma'am. I'd just come to purchase some garbage bags and some gloves.

The older woman seemed to soften something about his face as she smiled and opened his door. "Sure thing, they’re both in the last aisle on your right."

Before she went inside, Izuku thanked her and smiled back. He quickly found what he was looking for and brought a box of trash bags and a pair of workers gloves onto the counter.

"What's the hurry, son? Why do you need trash bags this early in the morning? You aren't trying to cause trouble are you?" the old woman pointed to Izuku with an accusing finger, and he shook his head quickly.

"Oh no, ma'am! I thought that I could just try and clean the beach up! I passed it while I was on my morning run!" Izuku assured, voicing Oboro’s plan

At this, the elder woman gently smiles while scanning the items. “Wow, is that right?” she said astonished, “ You know how long that place has been a mess? What makes you believe you can do it all by yourself?"

Her words weren't really painful, she was just being realistic. He knew she was right. He certainly had no obligation to clean up the beach. He could have just ignored it and easily went about his day. But he knew if he wanted to be a hero then he would need to start off the roots of how heroes came to be. How they used to work. Heroes in the beginning didn’t do what they did for fame. No. They didn’t care for the recognition they would get. They did it because they just wanted to help.

“That’s the thing, ma’am. I thought that it wouldn’t hurt to try. It’s also a great way to work out, instead of having to buy workout equipment or get a gym membership!” Izuku brightly smiles towards the lady as he handed her the money to buy his items.

“Well, I wish you luck, kid. I’m guessing that you’ll need a place to put the trash you collect.” She stated, Izuku smiling sheepishly at her rubbing the back of his head she continued, “There are two dumpsters in the alley behind the store, they get taken every Monday.”

"Thank you, ma'am!" Izuku said genuinely as he headed for the door. He didn't think too much about how he would dispose of the garbage, so it was good to have one offered.

Oboro began to laugh as Izuku jogged back towards the beach. "Cheaper than having to buy workout equipment or get a gym membership! Man, how true that is nowadays!”

The first garbage bags were packed very quickly. broken bottles, cans of beer, old and rotting newspaper, all of it was poured into the trash bag. Plastic, paper, glass, etc. Izuku could take them to a recycling center! He was already pumped about this new project when Oboro spoke up.

“Hey, Izu, before you toss that into the bag” placing his hand on Izuku’s making him feel warmth blossom closest to the soda, can packaging he was holding in that hand. “make sure you cut each circle so if they end up in wildlife again then animals won’t get their heads stuck inside.”

Izuku's eyes lit up as he started to tear apart each loop before placing it in one of the bags used for recycling. Soon Izuku had used up a quarter of the box of trash bags gone and only had 6x5 feet rectangle cleared of the beach.

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permanantheadache · 5 years

Photo

It’s officially the 5th where I am! Happy DEH Gift Exchange! @sincerely-us My person was @iellostar Hope you like this!!

The prompts were: evan and connor on a road trip. like, to set the scene: like those aus of people running away and disappearing when they turn 18. And: Connor comes out to his dad and it doesnt go well, he goes to evans and heidi and evan comfort him and its super sweet and cute. And, like....for the art I did the first one, but...I kind of also did fic. Because I was worried that this drawing wasn’t very good. So, I combined the two prompts and made the fic below. It’s also on Ao3

Connor is smiling. It’s a gentle thing, this smile. Warm, happy. It’s Evan’s favorite, even though it’s the rarest.

Evan has been watching this smile form for the past hour. The further they get away from civilization, from all the drama waiting for them back home, the more relaxed Connor gets.

Anxiety and anger and stress leach away from his face, softening the line of his shoulders until he’s practically slumping in his seat.

“You’re staring,” Connor says. It’s not a complaint.

“I have a cute boyfriend,” Evan counters anyway.

Connor rolls his eyes, but his cheeks turn pink. “No, you.”

The road around them is deserted, which is how Evan’s anxiety likes it. This is the main reason he doesn’t protest when Connor takes one hand off the wheel to lace with Evan’s.

Evan pulls their joined hands up to give Connor’s knuckles a kiss.

It’s Heidi’s idea, originally. Long before Connor and Evan are even dating, she suggests that the two of them take a roadtrip, the summer before college. She thinks getting away from the stress of school and work, as well as their peers, might do them a lot of good.

She references Evan’s pin map, the one he abandoned at the beginning of the year--he’s replaced some of the old pins in their spots, as well as adding new pins to places that Connor mentions he’d like to see someday.

Heidi’s pleased that Evan’s retaken up his old habit, but she’s a little too smug about those new pins for his liking.

They have nothing to do with his crush on Connor, mom!

Not…not that he has a crush on Connor.

…

Okay, yes, he’s completely gone on Connor.

Thankfully, as Evan finds out later, Connor reciprocates those feelings!

But that’s a story for another time.

Connor is completely on board with Heidi’s idea, once it’s brought up to him. He’s perfectly happy to spend some time away from his family, especially if Evan’s there. The three of them make a cautious plan that, the month after graduation, Connor and Evan will hit the road.

Heidi, after nearly thirteen years of single-parenthood, is a master at budgeting. She helps them plan out where they’ll stay and the costs. It’s more than a little confusing to both boys, but to Connor especially. He’s shit at math and numbers.

Between their two jobs, and Heidi and Connor’s mother helping, they should be perfectly fine, money-wise, to do what they’d like.

“I wanna go to Bear Mountain,” Connor tells Evan.

Evan blinks, surprised. “I mean, me too, but isn’t hiking more my thing?” His eyes widen and he tries to backtrack. “Not that I think you don’t exercise! I just--”

“Let’s be real, I don’t exercise,” Connor scoffs, cutting Evan’s panic off at the knees. “But it’s in On the Road and you know I’m a hoe for anything to do with books.”

“Yeah, but you’re my hoe.”

“...”

“You know what I meant, asshole!”

They end up having to move up their timeline by a week. Because Larry and Connor get into their worst fight since the beginning of the school year.

The thing is, Connor and Evan have been open about their relationship to Heidi since the very beginning. And they tell Cynthia not long after. Both women are, to put it lightly, overly supportive of their relationship. It’s genuine, but Connor can tell that some of Cynthia’s furver stems from guilt. And because Evan and Connor have been mentally healthier since they became friends.

(They both still have their bad days. Some are worse than others. But, it helps. To not be alone.)

Unfortunately, Cynthia broaches the topic of telling Larry.

And she keeps bringing it up.

It takes two full months of convincing before Connor agrees to tell--if only to stop her nagging him.

Because Connor is a realist, he expresses his doubt to Evan. Larry has never been the most accepting--even about things that most straight, white men at least tolerate.

Connor won’t say that he’s worried, per say. But he’s got a bad feeling in his gut. And his gut is rarely wrong.

Connor has an emergency bag stashed at the Hansen house.

The first time that Connor has a fight with his family, post-becoming-friends with Evan, Connor crawls in through Evan’s bedroom window. It’s the middle of October, and freezing, and Connor has on shorts and a thin shirt. He’s shivering, in rage and because he’s cold.

After Evan gets done shrieking at the potential burglar, he loans Connor some sweats and makes him hot chocolate. He gets down all the spare blankets and make a cocoon in the living room.

Connor spends the night. The sweats are too short, but he wears them anyway. They don’t talk about what drove him to Evan’s house. They watch Food Network in near comfortable silence (though Evan can’t stop the worried look he keeps aiming at Connor, and Connor can’t fully relax until he’s passed out).

Connor crawls through Evan’s bedroom window three more times before Heidi (having caught on after the second time) gives him a spare key and a suggestion that he keep extra clothes in Evan’s closet.

“We’re always happy to have you over,” she tells him gently, closing his hand around the key she’s put in it. She’s smiling, her gentle amusement crinkling her eyes. “Just, maybe use the door?”

And so, there comes to be a small backpack filled with just enough clothes for an overnight visit and something for the next day.

At first.

Over time, the contents of the bag shift, as Connor comes over for impromptu sleepovers--and, as he and Evan became closer friends, more scheduled sleepovers--and switch out the clothes for fresh ones.

Eventually, Evan, kind of tired of how over-full the bag is getting (he keeps tripping over it when he needs something from the back of the closet), cleans out the bottom drawer of his dresser and puts all of Connor’s things in there.

It feels like something permanent, Connor having his own drawer in Evan’s house.

Connor drives, half-blind from the angry tears streaming down his face, until he reaches the familiar street that the Hansens’ reside on. He probably parks crooked.

He doesn’t care.

His hand is shaking as he pulls out his phone.

Connor: Im outisde

Fukc

Im outsidee

He can’t fucking type properly because his hands are shaking and he’s crying too hard and he hates this he hates his dad he hates himself he hates--

“--hey, Con, hey.”

He didn’t hear the car door open. Evan’s blurry figure is beside him, close but not touching. Connor nearly lunges to pull his boyfriend against him, immediately burying his face in Evan’s neck. He desperately needs the contact.

Evan is good at hugs.

(When Connor brings it up, their first month of dating, Evan goes deeply red. But he hugs Connor even more after that, so he counts it as a win.)

He breathes in Evan’s scent, a woodsy floral thing that never fails to send some signal to Connor’s brain that he’s safe . That, paired with the shaky hand running over his hair, practically hard-resets all the tension in his body.

He doesn’t know how long he stands there, curled around Evan’s body, but eventually he finds himself pulling away. “I fucking hate crying,” he grumbles, voice crackly from tears. He scrubs at his face roughly.

Evan pulls Connor’s hands away from his face. He keeps holding them. “C’mon, you can wash your face. And you’re probably dehydrated now, so I’ll get you some water. Otherwise—”

“—otherwise I’m gonna end up with a migraine,” Connor agrees. He’s suddenly exhausted. He allows Evan to lead him inside.

—

Heidi is on the phone when they come in. Her back is to the door, so she doesn’t see them right away. “Yes, Cynthia, of course I’ll look out for him. Yes. As long as he needs to be here. He’s like a son to me.”

Connor can’t hold back the intake of breath at her words--she actually seems to mean them. It makes his chest ache. His eyes burn anew.

Heidi turns at his small noise. Her eyes go wide, and then soften with sadness and affection. “He’s here Cynthia. I’ll have him call you later.” She puts down the phone and immediately gathers him into a hug. “Oh, sweetheart, I’m so sorry.”

Connor crumples in her hold, going limp against her. And, he finds, he is not quite done crying.

There’s a brush of another hand on Connor’s back. “I’ll go get you that water,” Evan says gently. He leaves the two of them alone.

Heidi leads Connor over to sit on the couch. He sits, curling against her like a little kid. She’s patting at his hair. It’s nice.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Connor shrugs. “Did my mom tell you what happened?” he asks, after a moment. His voice is scratchy as hell.

“She said that you and Larry had an argument.”

He scoffs. “That’s putting it lightly.”

She waits for him to go on.

“I just.” He sighs. “You and my mom and Zoe--you guys were all happy when Ev and I got together. I wanted. Part of me just wanted Larry to at least…accept it.” He laughs. It’s not a happy sound. “It’s not like I’ve ever exactly hidden the fact that I’m not super hetero.”

“Sometimes we’re blind to things we don’t want to see,” Heidi says gently.

Evan sits down next to them, placing three cups of water on the coffee table. He takes Connor’s hand again.

Connor chokes on a sob. “I don’t get why the hell it hurts so bad? It’s Larry , I shouldn’t be so cut up about this!”

It’s Evan who speaks, squeezing at their laced hands. “He should’ve been supportive of you. It’s not your fault he’s a--a shitty human being.”

“I don’t want to see him,” Connor confesses. “I don’t--I can’t…”

“Well, you’re staying here, honey,” Heidi says, firm. “As long as you want. Cynthia is sending Zoe over with your stuff in the morning.”

“I’m sorry. I’m shoving all my garbage off on you guys.” He feels like such a burden.

“Hon, we care about you. The people in your life that care, they help carry anything you can’t.”

Connor sits up, rubs at his running nose. Evan hands him a glass of water. He drinks half of it down. “‘M tired,” he says.

“It’s late,” Heidi agrees. “You boys should go ahead and lay down.”

Connor and Evan are still holding hands as they make their way upstairs. They curl up together on Evan’s tiny bed, but neither of them sleep yet.

Evan is tracing circles across Connor’s back with his free hand. His voice is quiet. “How would you feel about leaving this week, instead of next?”

Connor slumps in relief, giving a brief, jerky nod.. “That would actually be perfect.” His hold on Evan tightens. “I don’t…I can’t stay in the same town with him. I think I’ll lose my shit if I see him.”

“Valid. I think I might punch him if I see him.”

“Babe.”

“I’m serious. He hurt you, I hate him.”

They’re driving down to Harriman State Park, their first stop--mainly due to its proximity to Bear Mountain and the Appalachian trail.

It’s sunny, but not hot. It’s the perfect temperature for a hike. At least, according to Evan.

Connor has to sit down on a rock twenty minutes in. He’s sweating buckets and glaring at Evan. Evan is entirely too cheerful. “How are you so upbeat?” Connor whines. He reluctantly accepts an offered water bottle. “Don’t you hate sweating?”

“Of course I do, but when I’m sweating because I’m doing something I enjoy, it doesn’t affect me as much.”

Connor smirks behind his water bottle, giving Evan a raised eyebrow.

“Oh shut the hell up, you know what I meant!”

“Do I?”

“I’m not the one wearing black!”

The sun is just beginning to set when they make camp. Which is something that Connor actually knows how to do.

Those few years in Boy Scouts that Larry forced him to do are actually useful.

Connor scowls. He’s not going to think about Larry. He’s on a trip with his awesome boyfriend and he’s not going to let anyone ruin that. Not even himself.

It’s still early enough in the summer that night time is significantly cooler. It’s the perfect temperature for cuddling. Evan and Connor take full advantage and curl up together.

“Jeezus ,” Connor squeaks, flinching away from the icicles currently assaulting his legs. “Why are your feet so cold?”

A somewhat devious giggle slips out of his boyfriend. “I have p--I have poor circulation?”

“How come I haven’t noticed this before?”

“I usually wear socks at home, but I’m not going to sleep in sweaty socks. That’s gross.”

Connor heaves a long sigh and submits to Evan sticking his freezing toes all over his shins. “You’re lucky I love you.”

Evan hums happily and says, far too seriously, “I love you, too.”

It should be a big moment, them saying those words to each other for the first time. But, Connor likes this better. He likes that they’re calm and pleasantly sleepy from the long drive and difficult hike. His muscles ache in a good way (though he won’t likely feel that way come morning). And he is cuddling with his boyfriend, who loves him.

He snuggles more firmly against Evan and drifts off to sleep.

#Dear Evan Hansen Gift Exchange #iellostar #deh #my fic #tree bros #my art #connor murphy #evan hansen #Heidi Hansen #this is saved in my google docs as 'dear ev hansen why r u so hard to write. this story's shitty but i hope they'll think it's alright' lmao #Present tense #bc that's literally the only way i know how to write lmao #it is 9am on the 5th here so even if its the 4th in most other places im gonna post this rip me #sorry this is dumb and im dumb #stay tuned for the reject drawing!!#which is in my other sketch pad at work! so like tomorrow or something!#im gonna go hide now

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divine-identite · 5 years

Text

So March through July has been most interesting lately -

So, in short, we are going to call these Arcs (like story arcs). There are five of them right now.��

Facts to remember about this person; she’s bisexual, into open relationships, looking for fwb, is on the spectrum, had depression and social anxiety - which is why she smokes.

So I met a coworker who I got along with in march. I thought she was really cool and knowledge, however, I had a strange intuition that something was off with her at the same time. So before all that, I tried inviting her out to some events - concerts and stuff. Cause I thought she was legit cool and whatnot. She says no to this and eventually, in late April she invites me out to see Avengers: endgame; she does so because she works Fridays and Saturdays, and her friends are busy on those holidays. So I pick up, okay, so im just 2nd pick for this event? So I let it go and I buy our tickets and set the date and time. She cant do it because she is a tech and im just PRS. ( i just answer phones).

1st Arc

So on the movie day, I meet her at her place. her place is very lacklustre, she lives in a one-bedroom with no furniture - which is fine. Her roommate lives in the living room with an airbed. It’s all fine to me, I know the struggle is real. She’s nice enough to offer me coffee and scrambled eggs. I take just the coffee. She goes on a smoke break in her room, she's nice enough to close the door for her roommate. I sit on the roommate's bed and how she gets off it is odd as fuck; she kind casually brushes her hands along her arm and wrist before asking me to stand up, and it takes her a while to get up and go. Because shes trying to decide what coat she wants to wear. So finally go off, get a ride up to the mall centre in german town. She starts talking about her stories and stuff - and about one time post-banging some freshmen on her sophomore year. I was thinking okay that’s good on you lol. Now the worst part is she starts leaning her head on me afterwards through the whole ride. We get to the movies afterwards, and there two seats left because her dumbass wanted to take her time getting here. So one guy pointed us to two seats left in the crowd. The theatre was packed so what she did was cling to my arm and lean to my shoulder- again. So after the movies, we go to chipotle, and then to the beer & spirits which I pay. Because her ID is expired, how the fuck do you let your Id expire? so I have to get it. We order a lyft head back and drink at her place and play some games. We both had a good time but I left once I saw the roommate had teased her about being autistic and etc. The shoulder leaning thing had me confused - she told me im an associate.

So I bring up the issue with the shoulder leaning issue. So apparent none of that mattered. I got on her about how people can misinterpret that and she said few to interpret that. She gets upset because I bring this issue to mind like a few days. However, she mentioned one time a guy assumed she leads her on. Again she makes it clear we are associates the whole time.

2nd Arc

Next week May 5th we scheduled to watch the game of thrones at her place. I get off at 10:30 pm on a Sunday, and she doesn't work on a Sunday. I had to buy beer again - because so she meets me at my job. it was quite odd because her excuse for coming was “she was in town and though to drop by”. Nothing wrong with that but it did lead to some speculation. My coworker Gloria kept up asking questions like “Oh did you say hi to her?” “She usually doesn't wear dresses, Kelvin, what do you think?”, “ She doesn't work today here” so yeah it was hinting she knew something. Now after my shift we went to CVS and she offered to buy me snacks and food. She asks if I was sure? Now on this day, I had a sausage, cheese & egg. So I went to her place we had to go into her room since her roommate was sleeping. So she offered popeyes which I took only a wing. I sat by her bed rather than on it because - it felt weird lol. She said I could join her bed rather than sit by it - we are coworkers bruh. She leaves out too. So after smashing like 8- 9 beers I get on her bed because my knees were killing me on that hardwood floor. She comes back like “ It’s about time” so after a while she starts to lean on me again. So the beer takes its toll - and I start to nod off. So while watching Game of Thrones she would ask some questions. So around season 5 she stops it there - tells me to get my things. Escorts me out to the door of her complex. The original plan actually to use a spare bed but she apparently didn't want to do that. So she escorts me outside 4:00 am in the morning, it's cold as fuck in may. She couldn't stay out because is only clothed in a skimpy sundress and she's anaemic and plus she left her house keys in her house. So understandable but still no check-in. Which contradicts with her usually thing because she would always see if I got home. I got home around 6 am had like only 4 hours of sleep and had to go to work lol- I had a slight headache but I was good. I texted her to see if she was okay, said she was fine and that I was doing too much. I just added that hey you were right that I should have eaten something. Now this issue sparks something on her end, this literally causes her to snap off and she literally bans me from coming to her house.

After dropping her shoes off that she sent to my location because she lives in an apartment complex. we go to the gym together because of her social anxiety, now the fun part is after the gym. I found out apparently I had spilt beer on her carpet and pissed over her toilet while drunk, to be fair her bathroom is really dark. The only light is a night light behind you when you use the toilet. She had an emotional connection with that carpet so I sympathized with it and made to right my wrongs. So she asked only for three meals and me to go to the gym with her for a week. I decided a month because I felt bad about the situation. we agreed on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, Friday. Wednesday and Thursday are my days off.

3rd Arc

So off to the gym, some days she goes - some she doesn't - but either way I got continuously. Knowing discipline is necessary for progress. But usually, she is very inconsistent. So one week on Saturday she isn't going- rather than going I just leave it be. She's being too indecisive about the matter. I tell her to just tell me when she would be going and went home. So Tuesday comes up and she comes to work. She follows her usual routine; what's for lunch and etc? she comes up to check up on me and etc. But I wait until her shift after 12:30, now after that - my coworker comes up to ask “” Arent you going to the gym”. her reply, however, was “ No, I didn't do any laundry today. So I don't have any clean clothes to go with” That would’ve been news to tell me. So she leaves without telling me the matter - and leaves me hanging there. Wednesday and Thursday im off, and not once did it cross her mind. To make amends, so I actually have to reach out and confront her on the issues. She owned up to it but said her new meds for her depression. I understood in that second but for that whole three days? I felt that was really considerate tbh. I stopped doing favours because that was massive and just focused on me tbh. That was a huge disrespect to me and my time. So around June, I brought up the issue again to make sure we were clear and realised I had backtracked on it based on her logic on of the issue.

4th Arc

After a while, I agreed to invite her out to the movies. Went to see spider-man: Far away from home, I bought the tickets. We went over the seats and I set the time. So on the fourth, I reach the train station to meet her around 10:00 am, the movie starts at 12:45. She literally tells me to meet her at the theatre though we agreed to the train station, because of its fucking raining. Now the forecast said it would rain - but she chose to dress for the heat tbh. So I let it go and get a ride to the theatre and get there. We are early like its 11:45 pm so we decide to go to Starbucks. So she pulls me aside and asks if she can send lingerie and stuff to my house somewhat nervously (think of a typical anime girl who is fidgetting her fingers nervously) - because it's for when she goes to the gym. Still, quite an odd favour but i accept it. So after the movies, it starts to rain, so I got to CVS and buy an umbrella. Because she's wearing a sundress and if she got any wetter it is porn show. So off we go to across town to the Vape shop because the vape she has, has been burning her throat. So at the shop, the lady shows us how it works and after that she needs ID. She doesn't have ID....still so I had to literally use my ID. After a while, we go eat, and meet her roommate at the firework place. She arm links up with him and tries to get me to join - I literally shoot her down like “Nah im good”. So the roommate introduces us to his friends at her house - and off we go to park. Im literally lacking behind and she comes and checks up behind me multiple times. I state that im okay until we get to the park. Now at the park it's fine until it starts to rain, being the only practical person with common sense - hold up a single umbrella for five people. After 20 minutes of holding this damn thing up, I pass it off before she starts asking me if I want to watch Netflix. I say no, and then I went on my phone to text my friend for a while. Again she asks it before not too long she is leaning my whole thigh with the phone on it. Like you would with a couch armchair. This was no way platonic. After she leaning back on my chest with her back while we watch Netflix and stuff. Im like....you have your roommate there fam why not do this with him lol. After the fireworks, we leave but the large crowds cause her anxiety; she clings to my arm and literally is like “sorry for invading her personal space” ... it's a little too late for all that :T. We head to safeway , use the bathroom and head home.

5th Arc

We were supposed to go to Otakon together - because she invited me out to the invite. So I told Mike, a coworker of mine, I and she are supposed to be going. The whole week is excited about Otakon and stuff - and Saturday tells me “whenever she gets up she’ll let me know when she goes down to the convention centre”. I’m like.... what kind of rude shit is that? but I let it be it is what it is. So Friday comes up I call mike, he is down there and I meet him there. He tells me to call her to figure where she is - because she told him she’d be here 3-4. I called her and phone rings twice before going to voicemail. So she tells me “Oh im just got sick. Just my luck!” now I know this feels like bullshit really. You were super excited about this event - and Mike told me she looked healthy yesterday - again not making any sense really. So rather than just telling me you aren't going to show up at all. And she scheduled this event the whole time tbh.

#ooc: █ ▌❝ Tuning Out... ❞#rant: █ ▌❝ No Angels ❞

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armadil-lo · 7 years

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Hey, im the original annon that started the whole fakes lay low thing.... sorry! Anyways i absolutly love your additions and i never thought it'd get this big. Your tags kill me. I am curious however how do you think the rest of the crew might react when they finally meet Jeremy? Maybe geoff already had him on his radar. Maybe he is apart of funhuas which is a subsidiary of of sorts to the fahc. (1/?)

Maybe he is apart of funhaus which is a rival gang,maybe that was part of the big battle that caused the fakes to go underground.Like FH found and revealed the location of the penthouse the LSPD, because ifthey’re going down damn it so will the fakes. so Jeremy is just trying to getby after his gang is completely destroyed. And sure he wasnt a very big memeberbut he needed that extra cash to pay rent. And no other gang dare touch anyonethat the fakes may have a beef with (2/?)

So that is why he started joining the fights andstuff…. sorry i kinda got off topic… but the fact that ryan is with someonefrom a rival gang the very gang thay got them into this mess gahhhhhh!!!!! Theangest in the fahc would be so intense. (3/3) p.s. I’ve been follwing your blogfor a while so to see my ask be rebloged by another great person and comeacross my dash really made my day thank you for all you’ve added

OMG hello!!! Don’t be sorry, you’ve given birth tosomething wonderful :D Thank you so so much for the kind words omg, I’m sohappy you enjoy what I added!

OOOH I do like the idea of him being part ofFunhaus or another rival gang - I think I’mma go with another random rival gangthough since I like the idea of Funhaus/Fakehaus being on good terms with theFAHC haha :’)

Most of it’s under a read more because this got insanely long oops… Also just gonna tag @shadeofazmeinya and @miss-ingno bc Ifeel like that’s just a given for this AU haha

Jeremy who’s made his living off of undergroundfighting rings finally getting hired to do some grunt work for a crew whosename he actually recognises. He thinks he’s moving up in the world, thinks he’sfinally going to get his big break in crime, actually have a steady cash flow.He never even meets the head honcho of this crew in fact, but he’s only beenworking with them for a short time when he hears the boss just sold out theFakes. He has no idea how that was something a smaller crew like theirs couldeven accomplish, but next thing he knows it’s all over the news how the Fake AHCrew’s official penthouse has been found, how hackers are currently lookinginto the phones and credit cards they left behind, how the LSPD are on a manhunt and they’recertain they’ll be at one of many locations that they’ve now been able to traceback to the crew. And see the thing is, Jeremy always admired the Fakes. Alwayslooked up to them, appreciated what they stood for as a crew. They alwaysseemed so close and it was something Jeremy dreamed about having one day. He’salmost sad that they’ve been taken down by his boss. Scratch that, he isactually kind of upset.

And thenhe learns that the reason his boss fucking did it is because their own gang isgoing under. Only a couple days later and they’re under attack themselves,Jeremy fleeing before things get too intense. There’s a viral clip going aroundof his ex-boss being dragged into a cop car boasting about how “I took down the Fakes before I went down, Idon’t give a shit what you do to me now!” And welp, if Jeremy wasn’t in a rough patchbefore, he sure as hell is now. He goes back to fighting rings and small crimeson the side. It’s all he knows how to do.

Skipping past the rest of the posts that’vealready been made about FAHC going in hiding, Ryan working at Starbucks, Jeremybeing a regular customer there, them falling for each other obviously, etc etcetc…

I imagine it doesn’t take very long afterJeremy finds out Ryan is the Vagabond for Ryan to take Jeremy to the safehouse.Jeremy didn’t run, Jeremy didn’t slam the door in his face. He actually helpedRyan out, even after knowing exactly who he is and what he has done. Ryantrusts him infinitesimally more after that. Ryan is too injured to go back tothe safehouse the day after the return-heist-gone-wrong (I imagine a couplebroken ribs and a bullet graze at the least) and he wakes up to a blanket overtop of him and Jeremy is asleep on the floor beside him and if he hadn’tfallen for him already, boy is that the moment he realises it. Jeremy wakesup and he makes them breakfast and sits by Ryan’s side and Ryan just findshimself spilling everything. What it was like when they got taken down, howtense it’s been in the household for all these months, how fucking ridiculouslyshitty it is to work in Starbucks but that Jeremy is always the best part ofhis day, that this heist felt like it was going to make everything better somehow, like it was just goingto magically solve all their problems and the Fakes would be back on top in notime. How he’s actually quite scared that things will never be that way againafter what happened yesterday. Jeremy listens, and he understands. He knowsthat feeling so, so well. Hope just being shattered in an instant. They spendthe day getting to know each other – actuallygetting to know each other, no veils or masks or secrets anymore. And it’sreally nice.

But then Ryan turns on his latest phone andsees the string of increasingly worried and frantic texts from the others. He finallylets them know he’s okay, which only really increases their panic tenfold aboutwhere he is. Jeremy has been readingover his shoulder (okay so his head is leaning on Ryan’s shoulder actually) andhe asks how far away their tiny base is. Ryan bites his lip and says it’sacross town and immediately starts mumbling about how his motorbike waswrecked, he doesn’t have a car, he walked here from the heist, stealing avehicle now is just impractical probably- and Jeremy interrupts like “Dude. Youdisguised yourself as a citizen for almost a whole fucking year. A shower and a changeof clothes and you could easily just take a taxi.” Ryan protests immediatelythat then the taxi driver will know where their only safehouse left is, towhich Jeremy says, “Then we’ll ask him to stop a block away and I’ll walk youthe rest of the way.”

“…You’re coming?”

“Well I’m guessing you don’t have any moneyon you. And I’m not fucking letting you go alone when you’re hurt like this.”

And if it were anyone else, anyone else, Ryan would probably have toslit their throat for knowing so much. But it’s Jeremy. So that’s that.

Jeremy helps Ryan to the shower (and out ofhis clothes - awkward avoiding looking at his body ensues, because it’s different when he’s not fixing up wounds with Ryan half passed out) and tries to findsome clothes that fit him. He thinks a baggy shirt will do, and the longestpair of sweatpants he owns (which actually belonged to an old friend namedTrevor once upon a time). The clothes cling a little bit, but hugging Ryan’sfigure isn’t a bad thing tbh. Ryan shoves his gear in an old, torn backpack ofJeremy’s and they call a taxi. Ryan tells the driver to go to a street that’s alittle ways away from the safehouse (three blocks actually, just to be careful,plus there’s shortcuts through backalleys and whatnot). Jeremy winces a littlebit at the final cost of the taxi and Ryan feels really bad, he’s known for a while now that money istight for Jeremy, but Li’l J produces what is needed for payment and off theygo, the smaller man helping Ryan walk the rest of the way.

Ryan’s ribs and other wounds are aching bythe time they reach the safehouse but they’re here and they made it and heknocks on the door because he lost his key and it swings open after a secondand Jack is pulling him into a fierce hug. He chokes out a small noise of painbut then hugs her back, albeit a bit awkwardly because he still had one armaround Jeremy for support. Then, from the doorway, Gavin is asking “Who areyou?” And Jack takes a step back and Ryan sees them all crowded behind her now,looking at Jeremy in equal parts confusion, surprise and distrust. Jeremyhimself looks stunned tbh. I mean, c’mon, it’s the Fakes. They’re famous. They were practically his crime idols. Evenif he didn’t know Ryan when he first saw him (or in the many months following)and it took him a second or two to place Jack, he knows Ramsey, and Mogar, andthe Golden Boy. Who in Los Santos doesn’t have their faces burned into theirminds?

So Ryan clears his throat and introduces him.“This is Jeremy. He’s a.. friend.” Jeremy glances over at Ryan and snapshimself out of it to give them a hesitant smile. The Fakes all look fuckingweirded out at that tbfh because since when does Ryan refer to people otherthan them as friends lol? They overlook that for now and pull the both of theminto the safehouse and gather in their little living room around the diningtable and the couch to hound Ryan with questions about what happened to him,where he was, how he got here, if anyone suspects where they are, etc etc.Which Ryan all answers calmly and truthfully, asking them similar questions inreturn and letting Jack hover over his wounds. Jeremy sits by his sideawkwardly through all of this, internally freaking the fuck out that he’s in aroom with the Fake AH Crew and tryinghis best not to pass out, lbr. Also he’s trying to ignore the fact that Geoffhasn’t spoken one word yet and is staring at him with the weirdest look on hisface.

Eventually the questions turn to Jeremy ofcourse. Who are you, how do you know Ryan, what are you doing here, what do youdo for a living. Ryan answers most of these so that he can deflect what heknows Jeremy won’t want to answer more easily, though Jeremy pipes up quietlynow and then. They’re both grateful that the others don’t tell him to leave orthreaten to kill him or anything drastic like that. Until suddenly Geoffinterrupts something Gavin is saying to ask, “You’re not Jeremy Dooley, are you? Rimmy Tim?” Jack sitsup a little straighter at that, face going hard, and the others look at Geoffquestioningly. Jeremy coughs a small laugh, genuinely shocked that Geoff fucking Ramsey actually knows who he is. “Yep, that’s me,” he replies, dazed. He thinksthat this is a good thing for a fleeting moment. He does not know that that is avery, very bad thing.

Geoff immediately leaps up from where he wassitting and slams a fist on the table, fuming in an instant. “I fucking knew it! I’ve had the names, photos and aliasesof all of you fuckers that got away from dayfucking one.” The others are alert in an instant, Jeremy’s blood turningcold at his anger, slowly starting to shake his head, eyes wide. “Are youwired? Who knows we’re here?” Jeremy just starts spluttering nonsense, nothaving a clue what to say. Jack backs away. Ryan looks up at Jeremy with asmall frown. When Jeremy can’t produce a coherent response, Geoff takes a fewsteps closer. “You were with the [gang] when we went down. You assholes fuckingruined us! Look at us! Are you fucking happynow?” Jeremy’s shaking his head frantically now, starting up a whispered chant of ‘no,no, no’ but not able to cut into Geoff practically spitting in his face now. “Weknow exactly how many of you got away, exactlywho you are, and the first fucking thing we’re going to do if we get back ontop is take you and your little buddies out. Rimmy Tim is number seven.”

“He’s about to be number one when I blow hisfucking brains out,” comes Michael’s voice from behind Geoff. Michael may stillbe limping from where cops shot him in the leg, but he was still quick enoughto grab a gun and be pointing it right at Jeremy’s head. Jeremy goes numb andsqueaks out, “I swear, I didn’t-“ Geoff holds up a hand to Michael. Michaeldoesn’t shoot, but he doesn’t put the gun down either. And then Geoff ispicking Jeremy up by the collar and shoving him against the wall. “Are. You.Wired?” Jeremy shakes his head. “Are your friendson their way? To finish up the fucking job their boss started?”

“They’re n- I’m- I didn’t-“

Michael explodes. “Answer the fucking question!”

“N-No. No, nobody’s coming.”

“So whatthen? You found out who Ryan was on your own? Stalked him for however long,finally managed to follow him here? Gonna round them up to kill us all when we’resleeping?”

“Geoff,” Ryan quietly calls from where he’ssitting.

“No,I-I swear, I’d never-“

“You were gonna take us out by yourself?”

“I didn’tknow!” Jeremy cuts in, breathing heavily, absolutely fucking terrified.That makes Geoff pause, his grip loosening a little bit and he squints insuspicion. Michael only takes a small step closer with the pistol. “I swear tofucking God, I didn’t know. I justdid grunt work for them, f-for like two weeks. I don’t even know who was in onit, or where the hell they got the information from, I was sad when you- It felt wrong, it always felt wrong. I haven’t heardfrom anyone else who got out, I didn’t even know anyone else did. I swear, I promise. Please,I didn’t know who Ryan was, I had no fucking idea, not until last night. I’mnot going to tell anyone, I’m not going to do anything, I didn’t know. I didn’t know.” Somewhere in his brokenpleading, Ryan had called Geoff’s name again, and suddenly the older man isripped away from Jeremy and he slumps against the wall a little. Ryan hasgotten up, grabbed Geoff by the shoulder and yanked him away. His expression isgrim and Jeremy has never seen him look this deadly serious. Geoff opens hismouth to protest, but doesn’t. After a moment of tense silence, Ryan speaks up.

“If Jeremy says he didn’t know, then he didn’tknow.”

Nobody in the room speaks after that. Geoffand Ryan stare at each other, Ryan’s hand still on Geoff’s shoulder, Geoffdefiantly setting his jaw. Jeremy glances around the room, sees Michael slowlylowering the gun and staring at Ryan with a bewildered expression, sees Gavinin the corner looking vaguely horrified (he’s kicking himself really, becauseRyan had him look into Jeremy all those months ago didn’t he, but he thoughtnothing of it, only did a surface check. If only he’d looked a little deeper, maybe Ryan wouldn’t have endedup bloody bringing the guy here), sees Jack hovering near Gavin glancing withopen curiosity between Ryan and Jeremy. Because, you see, calling Jeremy afriend is one thing, but the only people Ryan has ever truly trusted in his life as far as the Fakesknow is them. And earning Ryan’strust is not an easy feat to accomplish, either. Really, the fact that Jeremyhas somehow wormed his way into Ryan’s heart enough for the man to totally andcompletely trust him is one thing, but the fact that the others have never heard Ryan breathe so much of aword about him is extremely telling of how much damage these past months have doneto them. Not just as a crew, but as a family.

Eventually, Geoff lets out a long sigh andnods. Whatever facial expression conversation the two of them were having seemsto be over and apparently Ryan trusting that Jeremy isn’t about to stab themall in the back is enough for now. Geoff wordlessly walks into the kitchen andsnags Jack’s arm on the way out, pulling her along with him. “What the fuck,Ryan?” Michael snaps, more out of confusion than genuine anger now. Ryan glaresover at him and Michael mumbles, “wow, okay, fine” before shoving the gun inthe back of his jeans and limping as angrily as possible after Geoff and Jackas well. Ryan’s gaze turns to Gavin, who purses his lips and takes a stepforward. Ryan doesn’t want to talk to him right now though, doesn’t want totalk to any of them really for leaping to conclusions about Jeremy like that, fucking hell, they don’t even know him. Maybe that’s partially hisfault, but shit, when was he meant to bring up that he had a massive crush on aguy while they were meant to be undercover? He looks over at Jeremy now,leaning against the wall, still looking half scared to death, pale as a sheetand shaking. Ryan deflates a little bit at the sight and reaches for him. Jeremyseems to jerk into reality, and looks up at Ryan’s face with wide eyes,standing up and reaching out towards him too. Ryan pulls him in for a hug,cradling him against his chest, careless of how it jostles his ribs. Jeremytakes a few deep breaths and Ryan lightly squeezes him reassuringly. He knows Gavin iswatching, he knows Gavin wants to talk to him. He can’t bring himself to care.He gently pries Jeremy off of him and holds him by the shoulders, leading himback outside. Gavin says his name softly but Ryan ignores him and closes thefront door behind them.

They’re standing on the porch and it’sstarted raining lightly outside and poor Jeremy still looks shell-shocked andRyan just wants to hug the shit out of him. But that would probably hurt themboth so instead he settles for asking, “Are you okay?”

Jeremy looks at him with a tiny frown. “I…”He opens and closes his mouth a few times, not seeming to be able to form thewords. Ryan doesn’t blame him. He knows Geoff – Ramsey – is a terrifying man to have on your bad side. Ryan heardJeremy talking not even a few hours ago about how he had always looked up tothe Fakes – another one of Jeremy’s hopes he supposes has just been shattered.Ryan gives him a sad smile. “Go home, Jeremy. My wallet’s inside. I’ll pay forthe taxi. Go home and try to get some rest. I’ll sort this out.”

Jeremy shakes his head. “What if they don’tbelieve you, Ryan?”

“They will,” he says firmly. He knows he canconvince the others to trust him – but Jeremy doesn’t.

“But what if they don’t? What if they didn’t believe me? Shit, I know theydidn’t. What if they come after me? What if you can’t stop them? I didn’t knowanything about what my boss was doing, Ryan, but they have me on a fucking hit list! I don’t have anywhere to go,Ryan, how am I supposed to go home? Gavin already looked up where I live, Jesus Christ, what if they think I’m-“

Ryan breaks off Jeremy’s ramblings by kissinghim.

They haven’t kissed before, not even comeclose, but it feels like it’s been a long time coming. Ryan presses his lips toJeremy’s and the shorter man melts instantly, tilting his head back andreaching for Ryan, fingers tangling in his shirt. Ryan cups Jeremy’s neck with one hand and the other man leans up on his tip toes as theydeepen the kiss. Jeremy tastes sweet and the air smells like rain and theirbeards scratch together and god, Ryanhas been craving this.

They break apart and Ryan half expects Jeremyto go catatonic, but it’s the complete opposite. Jeremy has stopped shaking,his shoulders have relaxed, and he’s giving Ryan a small smile. Ryan returns itwith a smile of his own. They don’t say anything more. They don’t need toreally. Jeremy trusts Ryan, and Ryan trusts Jeremy.

#fahc #fake ah crew #ragehappy #jeremwood #armadillos can write #this might as well go under my fanfic too #my fanfic #ask #prompt fill #jeremwood coffeeshop fahc au #this is like 6 pages on word fuck me #it is legit 3.1k words #this escalated from headcanon to drabble to practically a fic very quickly omg #thank you so much anon though like you might be the first one who’s ever sent me a bunch of asks wanting to share headcanons before <3 #I appreciate you a lot haha thank you again :')

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