#listen... there might be a lot of LP

[cosmic-ships]

Things about the ever-mysterious Azie (my oc) because I feel like talking about him! Not a full about or bio or anything just random tid bit stuff!

tw: a mention of emotional/physical abuse but DOESN'T go into any details! just the words are mentioned!

His real name is James Echo. He is the twin sibling of Clara Echo

No one except his sister knows his real name

Got rid of his identity so he technically by government standards "doesn't exist"

Bisexual disaster

Is hackermans (script kiddie turned Blackhat for survival reasons only... so maybe more black/gray hat??)

is running from his sister who is hunting him down (his sister is a private investigator)

Adores foxes, deer, and birds!

Lives off energy drinks (Monster to be exact)

Has leaned into everyone calling him useless/degenerate/bad (which led him too a "very bad" incident that happened 2 years ago that now has his sister hunting him down while also doing her normal job)

Hates his sister due to how they grew up. She was the perfect favourite child and he was always in her shadow.

Hates his parents (mother was emotionally abusive to him and dad was physically abusive)

Has several tattoos, stars by his left eyes, nautical star on his right hand, cherry that on his neck (he loves cherries like you wouldn't believe)

Beauty mark by his right eye

Wouldn't catch that man dead without fingernails painted (either black or blue)

Knows a lot about forest fire safety and forests in general, so much so that he hid for an entire summer as a fire lookout.

His favourite holiday is Valentine's Day just because he can buy chocolate and sweets on sale the day after lol

His favourite colour isn't even Blue despite his apperance. He actually love pink colours :o

Azie loves to listen to various music~! Here is his playlist~!

[excelsior9173]

i have to admit that i often skip ep’s from bands, i prefer diving into the meat of their work and often production/skill is significantly better on the albums.

however! i have spent my morning listening to sleep token and after hearing nazareth and calcutta again i fear i have been depriving myself of some fantastic music. i like one and two, i just never gravitate towards them. that might have to change though, i forgot how good these songs were

[magentas-dystopia]

I don't think I've ever seen a good take on Tumblr about music and this recent fiasco of the majority white userbase floundering to justify not listening to rap/ hip-hop is proof of it. So far You guys literally have pulled:

"rap is too violent for me" (stereotype that's painfully untrue and rooted in anti blackness)

"I'm autistic and rap hurts my brain" (I'm autistic and I know other autistic people who like rap)

"I listen to rap!! (And lists something that isn't rap in the slightest)"

"insert something racist here" (self explanatory)

"does Hamilton count" (I will stab you in a dark alleyway)

Please I beg on my hands and knees for you to listen to expand your musical horizons, go outside your comfort zone. To get a complex and rich understanding of the world, one must view art from people outside Their own fixed walks of life. I've put this gently but also, you don't need to fucking reiterate that "you dont like rap" or "you don't listen to ( insert black artist)" every time you speak on a subculture that you're not a part of. The conversation isn't about you! Move on! I will say that if there are people who WANT to listen to rap/hip-hop there is a plethora of artists to choose from from many different backgrounds that aren't what white media has illustrated it to be.

Some albums I can reccomend off the top of my head:

Saba - Few Good Things

McKinley Dixon - Beloved! Paradise! Jazz?!

Kendrick Lamar - to pimp a butterfly + Good Kid Maad City (2 classics)

Noname - room 25 + Telefone (both great albums)

Little simz - sometimes I might be introvert

A tribe called quest - low end theory

Denzel Curry - Melt my Eyez See your future

Outkast - Aquemini + Stankonia (again, both great albums)

JPEGMAFIA - LP! + All My Heros Are Cornballs (2 fantastic albums also I think he's rlly hot and he's probably my favourite artist ever)

Grouptherapy - I was mature for my age but I was still a child!

The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill (probably one of my favourite albums ever, To Zion still makes me cry a lot ;;)

I will say this over and over again until the cows come home but please for the love of all that is holy, you can't just keep fucking repeating dumb shit on the internet about something you know nothing about.

If you want to engage in new music it's never been more accessible and artists like Denzel Curry and McKinley Dixon even have bandcamps for you to support their music on if you don't like streaming services.

I hope this recent beef of the year has managed to actually make people listen to more black and brown artists. Music is something I'm very passionate about and all of these albums in some way have affected me on a personal level and changed my perspective on life and molded me as a person (and also some just sound really fucking good).

[fueledbysano]

what fragrances I think tokyo revengers characters wear

so if yall wanna smell your mans go sniff this at your local store. also most of these are unisex! u can do ur research and get them for yourself or a similar one!

♱ ft: Mikey, Shinichiro, Izana, Rindou, Sanzu, Ran, Inui, Koko, Taiju.

♱ a/n: just my opinion as a fragrance connoisseur. bc my flight is delayed and I wanted to pass time. also I was in the middle of writing if then chapter 12 when this came in mind so watch out for that too. also, if u want other characters just suggest them. I need something to work on while on the flight anyways.

Mikey - Straight to Heaven by Kilian

you will audibly moan when you get a whiff of this. very mysterious, dark, and elegant. it's sweet, boozy, and very commanding. hell, I think this was made FOR HIM. literally straight out of heaven. and i think it really adds to his attractiveness and vibe. it stays on his skin when you're cuddling after sex. which eventually, lingers on yours too which will stay for hours, reminding you of the intense night you had together.

Shinichiro - TABAC 28 by Le Labo

might have a bit of a bias because I wear Le Labo too but THIS. when I first smelled this, he's the first man that came in mind. it's super musky, has tobacco notes, and overall smells very fresh and comforting. really gives off the good bad boy vibe. he wears an extra spray when you cuddle so it lingers on you too and let the others know that you're his, without speaking a word.

Izana - NAXOS by XerJoff

this scent is so intoxicating, I'm telling you. almost seductive, if you'd ask me. it's bright, sparkly, and warm. it's a little lavender citrusy, dominated by honey, vanilla, and some sweet tobacco. and it's unisex too! much like Izana, it's inviting, unique, and unforgettable. When he leaves, he sprays it to your clothes as a reminder that he's not so far away.

Sanzu - Bergamote 22 by Le Labo

another Le Labo man. LISTEN— he's arguably the most difficult one to assign a particular scent to. I thought of Suavage, Eros, and a lot more very manly scents. While I very much think that he wears those, I think this is his signature scent. Very androgynous, fresh, and expensive. It is fruity and musky in scent. smells like your boyfriend who drives an expensive car and lets you be the passenger princess.

Rindou - Jean Paul Gaultier Ultra Male

it's very bright and sweet— minty, pear-y, a little musky, and vanilla in scent. youthful and fresh. I heard that it is amazing for clubbing, perfect for Rindou who owns the club. he sprays it on you on club dates to note to everyone that you are untouchable and taken by him.

Ran - YSL Y La Parfum

we all know that Ran loves Mont Blanc and YSL. But I think he wears scents from the latter one. Now this man knows his fragrances. He has a big collection and probably wears them in layers too. But when I think of a YSL scent that screams Ran Haitani, it's the LP. It's seductive, sweet, and dark. It's fruity, sage-y, and powdery, in a way that it smells manly. and I read somewhere that this scent attracts the women; but that isn't his goal when he already has you, smugly watching the girls who turn their heads to follow that sexy scent only to discover that his arm is already linked with yours.

Koko - Fucking Fabulous by Tom Ford

Koko is in fact, fucking fabulous. this fragrance is so expensive-smelling (and literally so expensive), which is his brand. and yes, it's a unisex scent. It's lavender, leather, and vanilla in fragrance— a beautifully formulated combination of sweetness and musk which is a masterpiece. I just know that Koko is a fragrance man too and this is his signature. He does not gatekeep and gets you a bottle so you can turn heads together.

Koko - Santal 33 by Le Labo

okay, fine. maybe there is a bias but Le Labo is just the goat when it comes to unisex fragrances which I think would be Inui's preference. I personally wear this scent. It smells like an expensive hotel. it is musky, powdery, and woody in scent. It's comforting, calming, but strong. Inui also dresses well so this really compliments his overall style. when you ride his motorcycle, you always get a whiff of it and Inui could tell from how much you cling onto him and rest your chin on his shoulder. and he thinks it's adorable.

Taiju - Gentle Fluidity Silver by Maison Francis Kurkdjian

SO SEXY. fresh, crisp, and sophisticated. while it may seem like it's a manly scent, it's unisex. people on the internet like to describe it's scent as young, sexy ceo vibes and I couldn't agree more. I think Taiju would go for this instead of smelling like every other mothefucker in the streets. He sprays it in your car too so you are reminded of his presence, and whoever dares to get in it.

[ohsohoney]

When it comes to love you're just as blinded.

Part Three

Eminem x Musician

Summary: It starts with a drunk embarrassing video, it spirals into something a whole lot more.

Note: Ah this took ages to write but I actually really loved it- finally they meet!! Hopefully I got a few things about Detroit right too but I don't live there so lemme know if not! Also I appreciate all the love the last two parts have gotten, means a lot!

Warnings: Some heavier topics surrounding a rough childhood and abuse of substances.

Set in 2014, just after the release of LP 2 || Em’s daughters are renamed here because it felt weird not to and also have different ages– doesn’t affect the story much but just a warning! Rosie's nickname is also Z:)

Masterlist

It was far too early to be up. Especially after the night I’d just had, tossing and turning until I’d eventually passed out from sheer exhaustion. Something I hadn’t quite anticipated after my call with Em, but sleep had seemed near enough impossible once I’d hung up. No real reason as to why, simply that my mind had gone from a dull sluggish buzz to over-fucking-load in a mere matter of seconds.

Thankfully I had a flight to catch which meant that, even though I looked like my mum after another week long bender, I would be able to catch a little sleep before landing in Detroit. 

Detroit. That was the singular thought my tired mind kept pausing on. Stupidly, it felt just like yesterday that Marshall had first bridged that gap between us and phoned me, only it had been weeks since then, during which the most unexpected friendship had blossomed. He’d called again that next day and the timezones separating us had been made all that more obvious, him having not long dropped his daughter off at school whilst I’d been returning from lunch. He never really had given me the real reason as to why he’d gone and gotten in touch again so quickly, only that he’d wanted to double check that I was still down to fly out and work on a song or two. 

It hadn’t phased me. Neither had the next few calls that had followed, nor the texts that I’d found myself composing to him at odd hours of the day. 

We’d spoken about music at first: “Who inspires you?” He’d asked me which had led into a ramble. Something I only ever tended to do with those who knew me best, never having really mastered the whole art of social interaction yet, even after the fame. But he’d let me go on, before I’d eventually spun the question back around on him and listened quietly to a passionate speech about the handful of artists that had transported him out of the tiny room he’d grown up in and into something other.

I mentioned my sister after that. Em had heard her shouting at the tele one evening whilst she’d played some game that always seemed to bring out her most profane language and laughed, asking after the roaring gremlin in the background. I’d told him bits and pieces, added to the story in odd quips and mentions over the passing weeks, enough that most wouldn’t quite catch on to what I’d been avoiding, but Lottie had been around more often than not and the man had quickly worked out that she lived with me. He’d never outright asked me the reason as to why, though I liked to think that he was simply waiting for me to tell him, because this thing that we had, it was all about building trust. And Marshall? He was almost as unforgiving with who he gave that out to as I was. 

Soon enough our calls and Facetimes had become a featured part of my day, one I actually looked forward to. But even saying that, I was still shit scared of meeting him properly.

As much as it might humour him for me to admit it, I was a big fan of his. Had been since I’d first heard Guilty Conscience when it had hit the UK charts. I’d been swallowed whole by the rest of his LP, had even nicked a cd copy of it off a stall down at the market, alongside Aquemini, because I’d liked it so much. In truth, one of my earliest memories even featured the man. It was of my uncle bagging tickets to Em’s first real show down in Notting Hill, his girlfriend at the time’s brother having managed to somehow score a couple on a whim. It had been all they’d talked about for weeks on end.

I’d been around long enough now though– having dived headfirst into the industry before dipping a toe in first– that I knew just how meeting your icons wasn’t all it was chalked up to be. Still, this felt different to us just bumping into one another at some show or a party. And, who was I kidding– it was entirely different. Impossibly so. I’d said it to him then and I’d reiterate it again, he had been the last person I had ever expected to call.

“Passengers boarding the 09:53 flight to Detroit, Michigan please head to Gate B7.”

I sucked in a deep breath at the overhead announcement, figuring that it really was now or never. Two weeks in a big old house working on music with Eminem, I supposed stranger things had to have happened. So instead of lingering on the inane concept, I popped an anti-sickness tablet and dragged my carry-on over towards the gate. 

…

Truth be told, I much would have preferred not having slept on that flight. God, I was still embarrassed, but even so I couldn’t help the muted giggle that bypassed my lips whilst I waited for my luggage to drift on by. 

I was just thankful that I’d had the foresight to wear a hat and sunnies the entire time. Mostly out of habit, yes, but also so that I could keep this whole Detroit trip hush hush, because Marshall really had gone above and beyond to bring me out here and so I didn’t want to reward him with a swarm of unwanted questions. Not that anyone would even add up the notion of me being here and allude that it was down to him. That was probably the most unlikely headline somebody could conjure up.

But back to the whole Flight from Hell. Well, I had the tendency to sometimes be dramatic so not Hell per se, it had just been humiliating. Being shaken awake only to realise you'd been drooling the entire time and the rest of the passengers had already disembarked was more than a tad bit mortifying, especially when the air steward’s eyes had widened a fraction when I’d tried to sort myself out and wake up. 

I wasn’t entirely sure if he’d recognised me, or if it had just been down to the fact that Marshall had put me in First Class— a matter which I had complained about, justifiably— and that I had one of those faces he couldn’t put a name to. But either way, I hoped he wouldn’t expand too much on it.

I caught sight of my suitcase just as it pushed its way through the heavy black flaps on the end of the conveyor belt and so I slid past a man in a bright green Packers jersey to grab at it. And even I had to wince at the sight of the offending article. In all places, really? I wanted to ask. Wrong fucking move there, mate. 

By the time I finally did make it out of the crowd that had amassed, it had been near enough an hour since I’d landed and so I had a few messages waiting patiently for me.

Messages  The Martian Blacked out GMC parked out front Tap twice on the back window

Then…

Flight ok?

My mouth quirked upwards on its own accord at the quick relay but I was quick to shoot something back.

Messages  Might have passed tf out Woke up and it was just me and the steward there:))) Also tap twice?? Do I look like James Bond to you?

Although I had to Google what the fuck a GMC looked like, I did eventually work my way out of the terminal to spot the sleek SUV sat a way down in the drop off zone. ‘Course he’d have his driver park there, I thought pointlessly to myself as I manoeuvred past a handful of tired faces with a polite smile. Though to him it was probably easier to deal with whatever fine he got plastered with than it would be for me to attempt to find the thing in pickup parking. Not that it would be all that hard, it was huge.

Anyway, by the time I managed to hone in closer on the vehicle I felt my nose scrunch up in slight embarrassment at the thought of having to knock twice, as though I really was some sort of spy or, more than likely, a dodgy dealer. But just as I approached, prepped to knock and give the driver my name, I heard the far side door open and a pair of shoes hit the rough tarmac. 

Jumping back a tad, my head swivelled left to better view the figure who was then rounding the car. My eyes widened at the sight I was met with.

His smirk at my evident shock was ascued by a heavy hood and the brim of a dark cap, but it was there. Stayed there actually, all whilst he easily manoeuvred my luggage from out of my hands and into the boot of his car, whilst I simply stood there stock-still. Eventually, he came to stand before me about an arms length away. I blinked and my gaze skittered over the rest of our surroundings before they finally returned to his tilted head and piercing eyes. His back was turned towards the airport, away from the trio which had since grouped around their suitcases to wait and a handful of people that exited the terminal one or two at a time.

“What, I don’t get no hug?”

The mirthful lilt of his deep voice surprised me and my mouth worked over a plethora of words that couldn’t quite take stage before I was laughing softly into the shoulder of his jacket, his arms coming up to wrap around me. 

It felt oddly surreal to finally meet him, even if I had been so caught off guard by his sudden presence.

In fact, I jolted back at the very thought and thumped his arm, my eyes narrowed even whilst my smile never appeared to falter. “Why are you here?”

His tongue darted out to wet his lower lip, arm moving to cradle the offended limb in sly mocking, before he huffed out a low laugh. “No, hello? No, wow, Marshall, I can’t believe you’re really here!”

My mouth gaped at the teasing tone he took on, much like something I’d heard on one of his songs, and then I was laughing too, shaking my head at his antics. “That’s how we’re playing this?” I quirked a brow, but eventually mimicked, “Wow, Marshall. Gee golly, I just can’t believe that you’re really here!”

Marshall dipped his chin in supposed approval, gentle eyes roaming over my face in a way similar to what I must have done when he’d first arrived. I wondered briefly what he saw but hastily brushed the thought aside. “The American accent still sucks, by the way.” He acknowledged just as he stepped forward to open the passenger side door, surprising me yet again as he slipped by me, “So if you’re goin’ into acting, take note.”

My glare was mocking at best, lacking any real heat as he waited for me to climb inside, it was only once I’d glanced back at him with a thankful smile that he moved to shut the door. I took in a sharp lungful of air at the quiet that then engulfed the car and watched him move around the front of the hood. He was achingly familiar and yet not at the same time. And it was such a strange thought to latch onto that I took the initiative to just take things as they came over the next few weeks, which turned out to work in my favour when he joined me in the car and the engine revved.

“I can’t believe you’re actually here.” I found myself saying as he slowly peeled his way out of the drop off bay. “Thought you said you’d have someone come get me.”

Em simply shook his head whilst I observed how his hands slid around the wheel with an effortless ease. “I said there’d be a car.”

My eyes widened to accentuate my point. “Exactly! There’d be a car! So I just figured a cab or something.”

His eyes flickered over towards me just as we came to a stop at the busy intersection outside the airport, then pulled away to look left and right again. “Well, you should stop figuring then.”

I couldn’t stop the eye roll I gifted him, even as I laughed heartily to myself and took in the comfort of privacy the car offered, as opposed to the flight I’d just been stuck on. It was then, whilst we merged onto the highway and followed into the flow of traffic, that I got the chance to really look at him. 

I was still attempting to get over my evident shock, having expected to meet him much later on, once I’d been dropped off at the house or maybe even a while after that. But it was nice to know that he’d driven all the way here to merely pick me up when he could have just as easily sent someone to do it for him. 

Marshall looked about the same as he had when we’d first phoned in truth, only it was easier now to see all of the minute details he offered the world, those tiny imperfections. 

The slight dip in his chin was much more prominent now what with the way his lips had since pursed in concentration. The skin there was smooth, as though not much time had passed since it had last been seen to by a razor, and it wrinkled only around his eyes when they narrowed into focus. His nose was pointed, whilst simultaneously being both strong and soft. He had eyelashes that I could only envy, dark and long, and freckles light enough to dot both sides of his face.

He must have felt my gaze on him though because he soon chanced a glance back at me with a single raised brow. My eyes slid away from his profile and instead I opted to gesture my chin out towards the tinted windows that encased us. “These legal?” I had wondered, but mostly asked just to steer his mind away from me having been caught staring.

With a short snort, his brow dropped and the beginnings of a smile twitched at the corners of his mouth. “What d’you think?”

I chuckled in retort, having expected that, and then looked away again, out towards the grassy verge that separated the long stretch of road from small grey buildings that littered both sides in the distance. It was my first time in Detroit and I wanted to make the most of it, remember every part.

It was quiet for a while after that, Em having switched on the radio at some point after asking after my flight, the two of us more than content to just let the silence linger around the hum of something so familiar, music.

He pointed things out to me here and there on the journey, nothing of real importance but dropping comments that would either make me hum or laugh loudly. He was a funny fucker even when he didn’t seem to be trying, I figured that was what I liked best about him. 

We drove through Downtown Detroit at one point and I listened intently when he spoke about Ford Field, the home of his favoured Lions, and again when we stopped at a traffic light and he gestured over towards where the Fox Theatre sat. Even during the daylight it drew the eye.

Once we’d rolled away from the inner city and its skyscrapers though I felt myself relax further, pleased by the vast amount of green that I started to see. Most of the time I’d spent in The States often left me confined to the major cities, to their bustling crowds and hectic commutes, mostly because I didn’t have much of a choice in the matter, what with venues and tours, interviews and recording sessions. So this would probably be the first time I’d get to see a slice of the country’s suburbs and it wasn’t all too different from what you’d typically see back home. Not exact sure, but similar in a lot of circumstances. 

It took me a while to realise that Em had been nodding his head along to the radio, following the beat in an exact tempo. The sight had me hiding my grin behind my sleeve but the move captured his attention and he must have seen the growing joy my glazed eyes gave away to when he peered over at me because his forehead furrowed. “What?”

Instantly I shook my head, “Nothing.”

His eyes darted out towards the road, shifting gears before the back of his hand shot out to tap the side of my knee. “What?” He prodded again and I was startled by the easy nature of his touch, remembering then that it was possible now that we weren’t stuck between screens.

I snorted softly, dropping my arm seeing as he’d already caught on to the grin. “Just strange, is all. Being here.”

I watched closely as he gave a slow blink and waited, propping my arm up against the window whilst slumping a little in my seat.

“Good weird, or bad?”

The answer had to have been obvious and yet, I still answered him, “The good kind.”

“Good.” He hummed and my grin softened at his own small smile. It remained there for most of the drive. 

I didn’t know what I had expected to see once we finally did pull up to the house, but it didn’t fail to live up to its owner's accomplishments. It was beautiful, big yes, but beautiful too. Terracotta in colour and with a long gravel driveway. He had trees and flowers around the fenced gate to further keep out any prying eyes, but they were vivid and lush. Pretty to admire. 

Marshall turned towards me once we’d slowed to a stop and I smiled, unbuckling my seatbelt before he huffed a chuckle, turning off the engine and moving to do the same. The door shut behind me once I’d jumped out and I let myself breathe in the change of air. Having been cooped up in the Big Apple for the last few days it was refreshing to be able to actually enjoy it and not just think about all of the heavy city fumes. 

I was quick to snap out of it though when I heard the slight beep that sounded from the back of the car when the boot reopened. “Hey, I can get that.”

Marshall's eyes cut over towards my approaching figure. “So can I.” He tugged the heavy suitcase out with one hand, “See?”

“Mature, Mathers.” I retorted, leaning past him to at least grab my carry on, but he was there too, our hands clutched the handle at the same time, his encasing mine. “I can get it.” I repeated, turning slightly in my stance to lift my brows up at him. 

He was close, thigh pressing into the ledge of the boot whilst his other hand still held onto the door stationed above our heads. “You’re my guest.”

His tone was gruff, low enough for only me to have heard, even though there wasn’t anyone else mulling about. My eyes shifted, flickering back and forth between his own. “Then let your guest get their way.” 

He blew out an amused breath, the weight of it fanned my face and had a few loose strands of hair fluttering. “You’re so fuckin’ stubborn.”

I shifted and his knee knocked against mine. “Here’s the pot calling the kettle black.” I quipped with a growing smile.

There was the slightest shake of his head, his mouth twitched, and then he was leaning in closer. I held my breath. Waiting. For God knows what, when—

He snatched the bag out from under my hand.

“Marshall!” It was almost indignant the yell I made, shocked by the sly move he’d played and the fact that he’d already jumped back to make his way towards the front door before I could even properly react. I heard his bright laughter echo back to mock me.

“Too slow.” Marshall called in turn, shrugging as he shot a smug look over his shoulder. “Lock her up for me?”

The tap he then gave his right trouser pocket evidently had me frowning and so I looked down on impulse, only to spot a set of keys dangling from the belt loop on my jeans. Baffled, my head snapped upwards, just in time to see him laugh and wheel my suitcase inside.

I took a deep breath, then let it go.

“Such a prick.” I muttered to myself, though not unkindly, as I jumped up to grab the boot door and slam it shut, using the fob to then lock the monster truck up.

By the time I made it up the rest of the drive and through the front door I was a little less peeved about the whole thing, which was mostly down to me having been a little humoured by his methods of undermining.

“You treat all your supposed guests like this?” I blew out.

Marshall only greeted my entry with a snort. “Uhuh, that initiation we talked about? Starts here.”

Rolling my eyes, I stepped further into the entryway to observe, making the effort not to gape at the sheer size of it. Because in truth, he could’ve easily fit a half a dozen Harleys in the space between the door and the stairs.

“Where do we start the sacrifice then? Can’t imagine anyone would be all too happy about staining these pretty floors.” My toe skimmed a stark white tile as I said it, peering over at him through my lashes whilst I thought back to an earlier conversation we’d had and the fact that he’d actually remembered. 

“Basement, baby!” 

He used the term in ridicule, to accentuate the gaiety in the back and forth we’d just begun. His hands shot out wide in a gesticulative fashion and so I used the moment to grab at the handle of my suitcase he’d left by the door, thankful that the thing had wheels. I grinned at the small victory.

“You were saying?” I dragged out around a pleased smile.

Marshall shook his head at me, like he actually couldn’t believe I’d attempted to one up him— and managed it. Though he thankfully left it alone. Still, that was probably only due to the fact that he then said, “Want a tour?”

And who was I to deny?

“If you don’t want me getting lost, then yes please.”

He scoffed, but wore the ghost of a smile as he pushed further into the house, leading me this way and that until we finally wandered up another set of stairs onto the second floor.

“Bedrooms are there.” Marshall pointed out to me, hands stretched towards both the halls that lined either side of the staircase. “Mine’s just down here, Z’s too.” He explained further, gesturing towards the two doors on the far right side, Rosie’s bore a bright sign with her name and I was humoured to see that the usual silver handle had been switched out in favour of a neon pink.

He caught my slight smile at the sight of the door and nudged me with his shoulder.

“Quit it.”

I snorted softly, pursing my lips to dampen the grin I wore. “I didn’t say anything! But I do love it.” Honestly it was too cute seeing him all mushy like that, and the fact that he’d gone out of his way to make something like a door handle special for his daughter was endearing.

Marshall grunted out a hum, then took a deliberate step over toward a room a little closer, the door had been left slightly ajar. He pushed it open to reveal a room that could have resembled a hotel room had it not been for the much warmer sense of comfort it offered. I reckoned it was down to the little souvenirs and decorative pieces that had been jotted around the place, like the snowglobe of Big Ben and a little British flag, as well as the articles of clothing which had been laid out on the bed.

My attention caught on those first and I glanced back at Em, who was now leaning against the doorframe, to ask a silent question. The man shrugged the shoulder that wasn’t pressed to the wood and suddenly looked a tad bit sheepish, “Rosie’s idea. Wanted to give you something, like, so you’d feel welcome or some shit.”

I let my fingers brush over the pyjama’s the little girl must have picked out. They were soft and dotted with tiny woodland creatures, bunnies and berries. My heart ached at the lovely gesture, never really having had anyone do something like this for me, let alone someone so small and sweet who had gone out of their way to make me feel welcomed of all things.

“You lucked out with her.” I murmured  and was granted a doting smile when I peered back up at the girl’s father.

“She’s aight.” Marshall reasoned, pushing out a small breath as he took a step further into the bedroom. “Room okay then?”

Smiling, almost a little stupidly, I chuckled in disbelief and took another peer around the room. “It’s perfect, thank you again for this.”

He rolled his eyes at me and made a gah sound, “Say thanks again and I’ll take you to the nearest motel.”

My eyes widened just as my jaw dropped, “A motel, really? Wow, and here I thought we were truly bonding.”

“You know what they say, don’t assume.”

Narrowing my stare into something a bit more intense I waited for him to crack, but he must have been half-alien or something because the man held his own much longer than I did. “You’re such a dick.” I eventually chuckled, shaking my head.

“Get used to it,” He retorted and stepped away to wheel my suitcase further into the room, placing my bag down on the end of the plush bedspread. “You tired? Figured we could grab something to eat once Z’s home if you’re down.” 

It was something I was used to, the whole jumping back and forth between serious and teasing, but I still found it sweet how he would tend to ask after me, simply to make sure that everything was still good.

I hummed in reply and took one last look at the pyjamas I'd been gifted. “I’m good, slept on the flight–”

“And drooled all over them First Class seats.” He butted in, earning himself a short glare which only proved to make him grin. 

I should have known to have kept that shit to myself, fucker would probably lord it over my head forever.

“Uhuh, hilarious.” I deadpanned before continuing on like he hadn’t interrupted, “What’re you thinking of getting?”

The question went unanswered because it was then that the front door sounded, creaking open on its heavy hinges before it rattled closed. I jumped at the unexpected noise whilst Em simply glanced back over his shoulder, “That’ll be her.” He commented, confusing me for a second when he raised his hand and started a countdown on his fingers, “3, 2, 1–”

“Dad!”

I snorted at the precise timing, Marshall already moving towards the door at the call of his name and so I went to follow. It was just as we made it back out onto the hallway’s landing that he paused, “I can keep her occupied for a while if you wanna settle in, take a nap or something.”

It was an offer and a half from any parent to attempt to keep their kid at bay, I mean I’d done it a fair few times with an excitable Lottie over the years, but I waved it off, smiling when the girl’s voice called out again. “Dad?”

Marshall leaned in closer, hand clutching the bannister, and lowered his voice whilst his face got all serious, “Get out whilst you still can.”

Huffing out a mirthful breath, I couldn’t quite hide my smile. “I’m good, I'm actually excited to meet her.”

He paused and observed me for a moment, as though he was trying to see the truth behind that sentiment, which made me unsure. But I hoped he did find the sincerity in my words because it hadn’t been a lie, I was nervous to meet his daughter sure, wanted her to like me and not feel as though I was suddenly imposing on her life, but I had genuinely enjoyed her witty remarks and scathing comments when we had spoken the night before. She reminded me of a little of a younger Lotts. 

Em eventually nodded at me, cheek dimpling ever so in a possible attempt to dampen his reaction, but before I could question it, the man was jogging down the stairs. “Up here, you monster. And what I tell you ‘bout yellin’?”

A familiar face poked its way out of the hall at the bottom of the staircase and the smile that dawned on it was beaming when she spotted her dad. “How are you gonna hear me if I don’t yell?” She replied, squealing when the man swept her up off feet and into a hug, peppering a line of kisses into her hair, “Dad!”

Marshall snorted at the reaction he’d garnered but eventually lowered the girl back down onto her feet, whilst I just stood at the bottom of the stairs watching them with a fond smile. “What?” He said in a put upon voice and ran a hand over the girl’s head, bulging his eyes out wide when Rosie pulled a face. “How was school, kiddo?”

Rosie pushed up onto the balls of her feet before she rocked back, “Good, I ran out to the car quick to get home ‘fore she gets here.”

The smirk the man took on was almost evil and he laughed when he cocked his head out to gesture behind the girl. “Just about managed it.”

A curtain of honey coloured hair swept over her shoulders when the girl twirled around on her heel, eyes widening in sudden surprise to find me standing there. “El!” She called out, a grin breaking across her features before she hurried over to engulf me in a hug too.

Even as surprised as I was by the gesture, I chuckled and lowered myself down to squeeze her back, smiling at Em from over the top of her head. “Hey,” I murmured gently, staying crouched even as we pulled apart, “Thanks for the pjs, they’re probably the best gift I’ve gotten in ages.”

That statement appeared to thrill the girl, who’s eyes twinkled under the soft lights, “I got a matching pair, guessed we could wear them tonight and watch a movie so you’d feel more at home.”

My heart burst at the thought, I was sure of it.

But then Marshall went to speak and I already knew what he’d been prepared to say, so instead of letting him ruin Rosie’s sweet plans, I was quick to jump in, “I’d love that.”

The smile she gave me was award worthy and she turned back to face her dad with that settled. “See, if you had gotten the same ones like I said, you could’ve joined!”

I snorted at the expression that then crossed Em’s face, his head jolting back a tad. 

“You really didn’t get some to match?” I egged the girl on, mouth dropping open in a feigned amount of shock.

We were both met with a disbelieving shake of his head as the man blew out a heavy breath and turned away. “I’ll watch what I want and wear what I want, it’s my house.” He threw back at us as he headed further into the house, murmuring under his breath, “Women.”

Rosie and I shared a conspiratorial grin before we made to follow after him. 

“It’s rude to just dump your friend, Dad.” Rosie commented once we’d wandered into the kitchen to find Em grabbing a couple of bottles out of the fridge, the girl slid onto a stool at the end of the island whilst I bit my cheek to keep from outright laughing.

Her words were met by an unimpressed stare that didn’t appear to phase her as she continued to swing her legs back and forth. The man let the fridge door slip close as he made his way over to join his daughter, handing her a bottle before sliding the other across the counter to me. “You got homework?”

Rosie’s eyes flickered from her dad to me, then back again, “Maybe, but it’s Math.”

“Well, we ain’t goin’ nowhere til it’s done.” Marshall told her with a small shrug, even though I’d seen his eyes widen at the thought of having to deal with numbers and sums. “Get changed and we can start on it, okay?”

The girl emitted a soft sigh but ultimately moved to jump down from off the stool, “You any good at Math, El?”

Biting down on my smirk, I ignored Em’s murmured warning of the girl’s name and answered, “Not bad, I might be a little help.”

“Anything’s better than my Dad’s attempts.”

“Yo, I try.” Marshall was all too quick to quip back in retort, his arms now crossed over his chest as he stared his daughter down with a slight frown.

Rosie’s smile was precious, but her eyes told another story. I knew then that she understood exactly how to keep her dad wrapped around her finger. She was a little menace and I already loved it. “I know, Daddy, my teacher said that my English homework was the best she’d read in a while.”

Em actually seemed to take pride in that and so I guessed he’d had a hand in that homework too. His daughter also appeared to take note of the fact that he was pleased because she hurried off then, calling out over her shoulder once more, “Be back in a sec!”

“Yellin’!” Marshall yelled, defeating the whole purpose of his previous argument, before he sighed and gestured me over towards the seat Rosie had just vacated. “See what I have to put up with?”

Scoffing, I moved to take up the stool whilst he picked up a few stray notes lying on the counter and placed a glass that had been left behind at some point into the sink. “You ain’t seen nothing yet. Wait til she’s thirteen and debating the point of riding a dirtbike to and from school with you.”

Em barked out a real laugh at that as he turned his back on the sink to shoot me a look that said ‘Really?’

I heaved a put upon sigh, fingers toying with the water bottle I’d been gifted. 

“That’s not even the worst of it.” I told him as my mouth worked over a smile, “Before I left she asked if she and a few friends could stay at the house alone whilst I was away, because, and I repeat, ‘If there’s six of us then that basically equates to one whole adult’. I’m still genuinely scared that she went through with it even after I said no, keep checking the security cameras to make sure there isn't a herd of teenagers working their way inside.”

He wore an amused smirk but I noticed there were more than a few questions hiding behind his stare. They’d been there for a while now.

“You can ask.” I eventually said, appreciating the atmosphere his home offered, from the warm walls and the pictures that decorated the place, to the odd bits of mess that made the too large house look lived in.

Em worked his tongue into the curve of his cheek and watched me for a moment, before he eventually settled his forearms against the counter and leaned into it. “Kinda figured you took care of her, even before you mentioned that she was your sister.”

My gaze flickered down to the water droplets that clung to my fingertips, the bottle sweating from the change in temperature. “Yeah. I mean, I’m a lot older than her, so we sort of lived through different shit but I went through a lot as a kid, with like my mum and all the issues she had. When I found out that she was pregnant again it was through this woman who used to work with her at the local greengrocers when I was little. I just remembered thinking that I didn’t want that baby going through the same thing I did.”

My mind flashed back to the memory. Thinking of Annie’s wrinkled face and the relentless rain that had only just begun to let up. She had congratulated me.

“I was sixteen, had long since packed my shit up and left, but I’d never had the money to get too far. So I’d still spot her out and about.” I licked at the corner of my mouth, unwilling to meet his eye. “I went to see her after I’d heard, mostly out of anger. Her new boyfriend had moved in and I remember just being thankful for the fact that my brother had a friend that didn’t mind putting him up. She said she wasn’t using, just fags and the like, a cider here and there. Was surprised to see me, though she expected a big song and dance about the new baby.”

I picked at the water bottle’s label.

“When Lotts was actually born, her dad was locked up proper– facing sixteen years for armed robbery. Mum had her in a ward two months early and ended up leaving her there to go visit him. She was a preemie, tiny, too tiny, you know?” I murmured and could still picture her that small. “Mum she came back that same night mostly for a bed to sleep in, but had already found herself a fix. The nurses must have noticed that something was up, they’d asked to run blood tests and shit, but mum wouldn't have it. Would come and go during visiting hours whilst Lotts was in the NICU. I stayed, only leaving when I had a shift to work, and even then I’d come running straight back.”

Marshall just stood there listening and in truth I was thankful that he hadn’t thought to interrupt me to offer words of comfort or probe deeper. Although his eyes were serious when I finally managed to look over at him, listening intently.

I rubbed my lips together before getting on with it, “I moved back in with her when Lottie was finally able to come home. Ended up taking care of the kid when I was still just a kid myself, only so that she didn’t get tossed into care or fucking overdose on whatever shit mum and whoever else left lying around. It was just the two of us for a while, before my brother, Danny, came back. He’d gotten caught up in something with these older lads on the estate and was still at school, so I worked nights down at this pub under the table to keep up with rent and he’d watch over her for a few hours. It was there that I started performing just for extra cash, like on mic nights and stuff.”

Em squinted and for the first time he opened his mouth to contribute something, “That’s where you got found, right?”

I was sure I hadn’t mentioned that in any of our conversations and so I could only guess that he’d done a little bit of digging on me, the thought made me want to laugh but instead I simply smiled. “Yeah, some scout just happened to be passing through.”

He hummed, taking that in.

“But by the time anything really came about, my brother had long since gone off to join the army and Lottie was seven.” I mentioned, eyes jumping back and forth between him and the bottle I still clung to, “I’d always taken care of her, but then I was suddenly needed elsewhere to make these dreams come true, to make money, to give her a better future.” 

I knew that he could relate to that, to the utter struggle and fear I’d faced, terrified it would all fall through and I’d be left with nothing again.

“I didn’t really have a choice about leaving her though so she stayed with a neighbour at first, then her dad’s aunt who was nice enough to pop round sometimes, she was an older frail woman. I managed to actually land something eventually and started work on an album, but even after that the weight of anxiety had settled and I was working so hard just to keep all of these producers' attention.”

I swallowed thickly at the next flashback that had hastily followed. 

“Shit went down while I was over here in The States.” 

I felt sick each time I thought about it, hardly even dared even attempt to bring it up even to those few that knew. Lotts didn’t really remember any of it though, didn’t recall the hospital scare or my frantic need to make sure that she was okay for weeks after it had happened.

“I flew back that night and managed to sort of work things out. Threw a fucking toaster at my mum’s head I was so angry–” I snorted stupidly, “It missed. But after that I couldn’t trust her. She’d lost any sort of love I’d held for her. That was about five years ago now though, so she’s a bit different. Trying, she says. But Lotts stays with me until the very second I can’t help it.”

Blowing out a shaky breath, I willed my gaze to meet his and was taken back by the intensity of his stare.

“Sounds like a piece of work.” Marshall eventually commented and it honest to God made me laugh, allowing me to fill that hollow in my heart for a second and be grateful for the ease of it, because I really wasn’t too sure if I’d been about ready to cry at his kitchen table. “But I get it.” He added, “I think it’s great what you did for her, too. She probably won’t realise that til later but you should hear it.”

I glanced away, eyes suddenly stinging and tried to smile. “Yeah, well.” I tittered, wiping the corner of my eye discreetly, “She’s staying with her now and it’s got me on edge.”

Marshall moved around the kitchen island to place a careful hand on my shoulder, squeezing slightly before he ended up dragging me into a one armed hug. “You’re tough. Which means she’s gotta be too. I’m sure she’s just doing what kids do and messin’ around with her friends. Remember that’s all I did growing up, anything was better than bein’ in that house.”

A small snort escaped me as we parted, though he stayed near. “Because that’s so reassuring.”

He clucked his tongue and grinned, knocking shoulders with me, “I was a good kid, didn’t do nothin’ bad.”

“Uhuh,” I felt the need to drag out, “The image of an angel, Marshall Mathers.”

“Too fuckin’ right.”

“Dollar!”

It seemed we both jumped at the sudden reappearance of Rosie, who came sweeping into the room with a finger pointed at her father and an armful of school supplies. The skin between my brows pinched in confusion before the man beside me answered her, giving me the explanation I needed.

“For what?”

“You swore.” The girl shot back at him and climbed onto the stool beside me to settle her notebook down as well as a few pages of paper and pens. 

Marshall ended huffing, unable to deny that he had and moved towards the cupboard by the large, sliding glass door. 

“Maybe don’t eavesdrop on conversations. Reckon you owe a dollar for that, girlie.” He’d since grabbed a plastic tub and I was honestly surprised by the sparse amount of notes that were hidden inside it. Em must have spotted my surprise though and equated it to what it meant because he spoke again, “It gets emptied every couple a’ weeks and that monster over there gets to choose what we spend it on.”

Rosie perked up at the mention. “Last time I got him to take me fishing.”

“Fishing?” I wondered, blinking at the revelation. I looked back at Marshall and laughed, “I’m sorry but I can’t imagine you in that scenario.”

“Ha ha.” The man said impassively, widening my grin whilst he tugged two dollars out from his back pocket and shovelled them into the jar before he returned it to its rightful place.

“He only caught one.” Rosie piped up, already having written the date in that backwards way the American’s preferred, “It was real cute.”

I raised a brow and shot it Em’s way. “Cute?”

Rosie’s smile was big and bright, “Yeah! He said we had to let it go though ‘cause it was so small.” 

Marshall rolled his eyes and then pointed between the pair of us. “You two keep this whole thing up imma go out to eat by myself. Bunch’a bullies, I swear.”

Rosie and I broke into a fit of giggles at that which only made the man’s expression flatten that much more, he waited for us to get over it before he looked between us and the notebook which had been laid out. “Enjoy Math, I’m gonna go grab a burger.”

“No!” I laughed brightly, spinning on my stool when he started to walk back around the island, “We want food too.”

“Yeah, we’ll start a riot, we're that hungry.” Rosie told him and I couldn’t muffle the rest of my giggles. Marshall merely rolled his eyes for the umpteenth time.

“Math, then we can talk food.” He declared, tickling his daughter’s side as he slid in beside her to get a better look at the worksheet she had. His eyes widened. “They got you using letters now too?”

Rosie’s laughter filled the kitchen and I got a first row ticket to watch her and her dad’s light ribbing as we started in on the first question. The sight of it made my heart swell in truth, it was just so easy to see how much love they held for one another.

[huellitaa]

bee's record player: march edition. 🎀𓂃 ࣪˖

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 !! notice !! ♡

surpriseee <3 wanted to try and add a little of my personal influence to my girlblog since music is literally my entire life & thought it might be funny to show u all what makes up the chaotic glittery mess that is my brain (and because there are almost 1000 of you beautiful people following me whatt?? thank you😭). i've allllways wanted to do smth like this too so, here u go !! 🩷💗

(+ this is a way for me to rant about my interests without being annoying to my friends / moots 😭. to anybody who has listened to me rant or cry or scream or whatever over music ily guys mwa)

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 NEW ARRIVALS

goddess, laufey

♡ released march 6th, 2024

♡ single

♡ running time: 4 minutes 28 seconds

eternal sunshine, ariana grande

♡ released march 8th, 2024

♡ full album / LP

♡ best songs: supernatural, the boy is mine, we can't be friends (wait for your love), intro (end of the world)

♡ running time: 35 minutes 33 seconds

unheard, hozier

♡ released march 22nd, 2024

♡ extended play / EP

♡ best songs: too sweet (i adore this song.)

♡ running time: 13 minutes 59 seconds

super real me, illit

♡ released march 25th, 2024

♡ extended play / EP, debut! ♡

♡ best songs: magnetic, midnight fiction

♡ running time: 9 minutes 36 seconds

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 BEE'S TRACKS: TOP 10

♡ 10. my world, illit

girly girl song!! i've been obsessed with illit's whole super real me album, their debut is soo good oh my gosh. its criminally short but i seem to have listened to it a lot !! 😭

♡ 9. we can't be friends (wait for your love), ariana grande

i have SO MUCH to say about this song but it resonates with me so much in so many different ways and i just. oh my god. ariana i love u so much

♡ 8. we got so much, le sserafim

k so i initially didn't really like this song but... it's grown on me. a lot. since it first came out. um. it's pretty simple honestly and it's just really girly girl it makes me feel like a school girl i love it

♡ 7. this is what makes us girls, lana del rey

girlblogger anthem!! okay confession i did not get into this song until LAST MONTH. i know. it's terrible and i am ashamed i am so sorry. but i have formed such a strong emotional attachment to this song its crazy i adore it

♡ 6. imperfect for you, ariana grande

exposing myself pt.3 i was in a really big depressive slump for like one half or more of this month actually and this song helped me so much i can't 😭 i love you ari

♡ 5. the boy is mine, ariana grande

(are you noticing a pattern here yet) um another ariana grande song no lol um idk what ur talking about haha 🥰 this song is so twerkable im sorry i wasnt a fan at first but im obsessed i need to stop

♡ 4. smart, le sserafim

no words. once again wasn't a huge fan originally but oh my god im obsessed w it now. afrobeat type of songs are, will, and always be top tier and i will die on this hill. (i've been SO OBSESSED with le sserafim lately but i think thats fairly obvious here😭)

♡ 3. eternal sunshine, ariana grande

i adore this song oh my god. its become one of my favs of all time since it came out. this was on loop for HOURS when i first heard it and its such a comfort song for me. it shows her growth so beautifully and there's so much about it i just absolutely adore like i could write a whole essay on this song and still wouldnt be able to express how much i love it

♡ 2. magnetic, illit

illit was bound to pop up here again this month tbh ok so me and my bsf were listening to this on loop the entire time at school a little after it came out like we were sitting in the front row of our class and were still watching the magnetic mv under the desk on her phone. so in love with this song it makes me so happy n feel so cute i ahh <3

♡ 1. supernatural, ariana grande

SUPERNATURAL IS THE SONG EVER. first day it came out i listened to the album and this was on loop constantly for the next week or more. it's made it up to my top 10 fav songs of all time ever and i listen to A LOT of music. this song is my life<333

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 ALBUMS

♡ 1. eternal sunshine, ariana grande

fairly self explanatory. i love u ari. there was soo much ari this month bc ive been a diehard ari stan since i was 8 and have never looked back. since yes and released in january i have been ecstatic about ag7 releasing in march after 4 YEARS of no ari so this was MONUMENTAL for me 😭😭 THE DROUGHT IS OVER ARIANATORS RISE 🩷🩷🩷

♡ 2. super real me, illit

so basically the day this album came out my best friend was spamming me about them and i only listened to them like 2 days after cuz she was annoying me about it and OH MY GOD. i listened to them and then proceeded to loop the whole album for the next 72 hours 💗 and for a debut as well is amazing ily illit girlies

♡ 3. with you-th, twice

so i wasn't much of a fan at first bc they just sounded really similar and bland to me but its grown on me a lot since it came out and i've been listening to it so much throughout the entirety of march. its just so oddly comforting in a way and feels like a hug in music form (+ rush and bloom are the best songs argue with the wall)

♡ 4. easy, le sserafim

self explanatory. i'm obsessed with le sserafim at the moment and this album is everything to me. ass shaking album 10/10

♡ 5. k-12, melanie martinez

i have been revisiting one of my fav albums of all time this month and its as amazing as always. this has been my favourite album of all time since it came out and i will never ever get over k12 🩷 10000/10!!!! <3

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 ARTISTS

♡ TOMORROW X TOGETHER

♡ TWICE

♡ LANA DEL REY

♡ LE SSERAFIM

♡ ARIANA GRANDE

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 SPECIAL MENTIONS

♡ happy 1 year to portals by melanie martinez! oh my god this album helped me through all of 2023 and i went to see her on tour in london for my birthday last november and it was surreal. she's amazing. i adore her and this album (i have it on vinyl hehe) and love it SOO MUCH 💖

♡ expect ordinary things by ariana grande to be high high on my top 10 next month its been on loop for days now im obsessed

♡ there's going to be a LOT in next month's issue seeing as 2 of my all time favs are coming back next month, so prepare for that! so excited ahh <3 (one has already released at the time of writing this. prepare urselves.)

──★ ˙ ̟🎀 EDITOR'S NOTE

this was SO FUN oh my gosh. i am 100% making this a regular thing~ lmk if it was entertaining, improvements needed, artists / albums you'd like me to keep up with etc, or just general comments, ideas, reviews and so on. thank you so much for reading, this was so fun! look forward to next month 💗🫶💖

lots of love 💘

[freddiemercurylegendabovelegends]

Today, on 10th December, 1976 - Queen Story!

'A Day At The Races' album released in UK

🔸FREDDIE MERCURY and KENNY EVERETT REVIEW “A DAY AT THE RACES”

CAPITOL RADIO, LONDON – NOVEMBER 1976

INTRO/ Tie Your Mother Down

Kenny Everett: God you’re noisy, Fred!

Freddie Mercury: That’s one of the softer tracks. [Laughs]

Kenny Everett: That track’s called “Tie Your Mother Down” from the new LP called “A Day At The Races”, which is actually ‘teffifico’ and it’s just out in time for Christmas.

Freddie Mercury: Yes, that’s right.

Kenny Everett: Why tie your mother down?

Freddie Mercury: Well this one in fact is a track written by Brian actually, I dunno why. Maybe he was in one of his vicious moods. I think he’s trying to out do me after “Death On Two Legs” actually.

Kenny Everett: I see.

Freddie Mercury: So if he’s listening, folks…

Kenny Everett: Let’s try a nice gentle lilting one now.

Freddie Mercury: Oh this is the ‘real heavy’ one, yes.

Kenny Everett: That’s right. This is one where you sing by yourself, times 35 or something, isn’t it?

Freddie Mercury: Yes, I’ve multi tracked myself on this one.

Kenny Everett: How many of you are there on this one?

Freddie Mercury: Well… what the next one? “You Take My Breath Away”. This one I did myself, I multi tracked myself. So the others weren’t used on this for the voices. I played piano and basically, I don’t know how we managed to stay this simple you know, with all our over dubs and things. People seem to think that we’re over complexed, and it’s not true. It depends on the individual track really, if it needs it – we do it. So this is pretty sparse actually by Queen and our standards.

Kenny Everett: It still sounds like the choirs of Heaven. So here comes Freddie…plus Freddie, plus Freddie…

YOU TAKE: MY BREATH AWAY

Kenny Everett: Hmmm, another classic there that’ll live forever from the lips of Freddie, “You Take My Breath Away” off the new LP. Which there’s space for in you’re Christmas stocking. Freddie.

Freddie Mercury: Yes dear.

Kenny Everett: We’re going to take a break now. We’re going to play a few of our bits ok, is that alright?

Freddie Mercury: Yes.

Kenny Everett: Smashing, back with another track in a sec.

LONG AWAY

Kenny Everett: [Laughter] Hey guys, the mikes on! That’s “Long Away” by Brian May. He does four tracks on your new LP doesn’t he?

Freddie Mercury: Yes he does…

Kenny Everett: I see, can you proliferate?

Freddie Mercury: Which tracks you mean? That’s one of his and “Tie Your Mother Down” was Brian’s. He’s written a lovely Japanese song, which is at the end of the second side. It’s got Japanese verses…

Kenny Everett: What, actual?

Freddie Mercury: Actual Japanese verses which we had to do, we did a lot of research actually and we had our Japanese interpreter. We flew her over from Japan.

Kenny Everett: Actually you should know Japanese off by heart by now, because you’re always there, aren’t you?

Freddie Mercury: Do you want me to say some of them then? [Recites a verse from “Teo Torriatte”].

Kenny Everett: Oh flan flastic! [Applauds] Flerry good, and now we will split for a commercial break. [Laughs]

Kenny Everett: Right, back to the spiffingest LP ever released. Oh what do you think of the new E.L.O.?

Freddie Mercury: Oh it’s great, I’ve got a copy of that. And I know you keep, I keep hearing more of those tracks on your show than anything else.

Kenny Everett: Well…

Freddie Mercury: So I don’t need to play my album, really [Laughs]

Kenny Everett: And also The Eagles, they’re the three for your Christmas stocking, folks. This is me talking to Freddie Mercury of Queen, who must be a millionaire by now, what Freddie?

Freddie Mercury: Oh…in what way?

Kenny Everett: Financially and commercially, I mean you keep buying these paintings and things.

Freddie Mercury: Yes because I like them. Actually it’s what I’ve been interested in a long while, and now that I’ve got a little bit of money to throw around I thought I might as well go and buy it. So I went to Sotheby’s the other day, and got a few paintings. The dealer’s weren’t pleased at all! [Laughs].

Kenny Everett: Actually, you’ve brought champagne with you, which is very good of you.

Freddie Mercury: But of course dear, it travels with me everywhere.

Kenny Everett: You make Gerald Harper look quite cheap. Thank you for that [Laughs]. Usually when I come in here, the place is full of old dead bottles, you know. And green fly…but we’ve made him look peculiar today. Right, “The Millionaire Waltz” which is the next track on the LP, what’s this?

Freddie Mercury: Well it’s all about John Reid actually.

Kenny Everett: You’re manager, well he’ll love all that.

Freddie Mercury: I might as well…

Kenny Everett: It’s a bit gay and weird and strange, but it grows on you.

Freddie Mercury: It’s very out of the Queen format, really and we thought we’d like to do that on every album. I think I went a bid mad on this one. But it’s turned out alright I think, it makes people laugh sometimes.

Kenny Everett: It’s very jolly, let’s have a listen to it.

THE MILLIONAIRE WALTZ

Freddie Mercury: Ooh, lovely! Actually I’d like to say that Brian did do a very good job on the actual guitars. He’s really taken his guitar orchestration to its limits, I don’t know how he’s ever going to out do that one actually. And John played very good bass on that. I think it’s good and we’re patting ourselves on the back again. I really think it’s worked out well especially from the orchestration point of view. Because he’s really used his guitar in a different sort of way, I know he’s done lots of orchestrations before.

Kenny Everett: He’s probably the world’s greatest guitar technician really, isn’t he?

Freddie Mercury: Oh I’d say that dear, absolutely…[mock aristocratic accent]

Kenny Everett: Yes, pass more champagne…[same accent] [Laughs]

Freddie Mercury: Champagne everybody!

YOU AND I

Freddie Mercury: That’s the end of side one of “A Day At The Races”. That was a track by John Deacon, he’s contribution to this album. His songs are good and are getting better every time actually. I’m getting a bit worried actually.

Kenny Everett: He’s the quiet one.

Freddie Mercury: He’s sort of quiet, lots of people think that. Don’t underestimate him, he’s got a fiery streak underneath all that. I talk so much anyway, he like to let me do all the talking. But once people crack that thin ice, then he’s alright. (You can never stop him talking then).

Kenny Everett: You’re all a very shy bunch really, aren’t you?

Freddie Mercury: We are really, actually. I am actually, people don’t seem to realize that. Just because I go around tearing on stage, they think I should go tearing around life, but I’m not really.

Kenny Everett: Good, well done. I’ve said to you once, you must have had a classical up bringing, and you went ‘Ha’! So I dropped that one. [Laughs] But I think you really must have.

Freddie Mercury: I did have in my youth… that’s a couple of years ago. No, when I was about seven years old, I did piano lessons and I did up to grade 4 classical, practical and theory. Then I gave it up, as I basically play by ear really and I can’t sight read at all. So I gave that up and all my playing is done by ear. I can’t read music that well, it takes me a long time.

Kenny Everett: Well how do you work out these amazing harmonies you do?

Freddie Mercury: Well that’s quite easy, yeah. [Laughs] The same as you do! [More laughs] I don’t know, I just have to work at it and after a while you fall into a pattern through experience. I think I’m getting better every year, don’t you?

Kenny Everett: Oh yes.

Freddie Mercury: I learnt a lot from our past albums and things. Seeing how they’re constructed and things, then you use things what you’ve done in the past and work out different things.

Kenny Everett: Oh you’re polishing beautifully, it’s a polished product now. That “You Take My Breath Away”, the harmonies on that are supreme.

Freddie Mercury: They’re nice, I’m very pleased with them.

Kenny Everett: You see – modest. Right, from the polished to…side two. A bit hairy this number, so if you’re a little old lady then please stand back!

WHITE MAN

Kenny Everett: Cor! How did you manage to get such a loud noise on one record?

Freddie Mercury: I don’t know, it’s down to Mike Stone our engineer. We’re very bad in the studio for that actually, the poor engineer has to really suffer because we really want as much level as possible. We keep pushing the phasers up and he keeps looking at the meters and going ‘Oh it’ll never cut’. Then we give him the added task of going over to New York or wherever and saying ‘Make sure that cuts as loud as possible’.

Kenny Everett: Yeah, I should explain for the folks, that if a noise is too loud on a record – the little wobbly groove grundges into the groove next door.

Freddie Mercury: That’s right.

Kenny Everett: Then the record skips…

Freddie Mercury: Yes, it can skip and do all kind of things.

Kenny Everett: So the more noise you put on, the less likelihood you have of…

Freddie Mercury: So if Mary Potts has got a little dance set, then it’ll just go flying off! [Laughs]

Kenny Everett: I must admit, you do get a lot of sound on one little LP.

Freddie Mercury: Yes it’s very difficult to… it’s a very fine dividing line really, because if you want to put in more music – but at the same time you’ve got to make sure you don’t put too much in otherwise it suffers.

Kenny Everett: And you’ve got a genius technician that looks after all of that.

Freddie Mercury: Well Mike Stone is pretty good, yes. That little bugger…

Kenny Everett: Yes… right. [gives out weather report with Freddie laughing and teasing throughout]

Freddie Mercury: What a nice little chap he is. [Laughs]

Kenny Everett: Right here we are in Capitol tower with cuddly Ken and Freddie Mercury, nattering about the new LP. Which also has this track on it.

SOMEBODY TO LOVE

Kenny Everett: So, if you’re planning to but this LP – you get that thrown in as an added goodie. The new number one single in Britain today “Somebody To Love”. Well-done Freddie.

Freddie Mercury: They’ve probably all got their copies by now anyway, so we might as well play something else.

Kenny Everett: Yeah, but the thing is we all had “Sailing” by Rod Stewart and everyone bought it. Then they re-released it and everyone bought it again. Very strange.

Freddie Mercury: Yes, go out and but it again, I’m not complaining. [Laughs]

Kenny Everett: Let’s play a little track off “Sheer Heart Attack” now, because I thought this was one of your tunes, because it’s so wilting.

Freddie Mercury: I thought you’d made a slight mistake earlier on, but this is a track called “Dear Friends”. Taken from our “Sheer Heart Attack” album, it’s written by Brian. I’ve done the vocals on it, but Brian wrote this lovely tune.

Kenny Everett: Well let’s hear this one.

DEAR FRIENDS

Kenny Everett: Very pretty. I didn’t know Brian May wrote that, I thought he was the hairy department.

Freddie Mercury: Yes he does those, he’s very versatile.

Kenny Everett: Ok, this next one is one of yours isn’t it?

Freddie Mercury: Yes, it’s called “Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy”, and it’s in my ‘ragtime’mood that I get a chance to, [Laughs] to do on every album and this time, this is something I’ve come up with this time around.

Kenny Everett: Right, a little frilly number from the pen of Fred.

GOOD OLD-FASHIONED LOVER BOY

Kenny Everett: Right, that was one of Freddie’s tunes. I hear you’re not too pleased with the musical press, Freddie [Laughs] Let’s be outrageous!

Freddie Mercury: It depends, I don’t take much notice to be honest. They can say what they like.

Kenny Everett: I find that they slag everything available, they just don’t say anything nice about anybody.

Freddie Mercury: Not constructive at all. The American press do their homework and the kind of questions they ask you makes much better copy anyway.

Kenny Everett: They pick the good points, and then blazon them all over the place.

Freddie Mercury: It’s more sort of things that are more relevant, I feel anyway. You can tell that they’ve done their homework because they ask you very penetrating questions – which I don’t mind. Because then you know they have some substance because when they write about it, it has much more bearing. But over here, it’s all ‘Why have you stopped wearing black finger nails or whatever…

Kenny Everett: Have you stopped? [Laughs]

Freddie Mercury: Then that’s the review of the album, they haven’t a clue anyway – so [blows a raspberry] to them.

Kenny Everett: Yes [blows a louder raspberry] to them!

Kenny Everett: You keep writing things that are things of beauty that will last forever.

Freddie Mercury: Well I hope so.

Kenny Everett: One day you’re going to come up with an LP that’s going to kill everybody.

Freddie Mercury: I thought we had – this is it!

Kenny Everett: Oh, what have I said! What have I said? [Laughs] I mean just you, I think you’ll come out with the Mercury symphony in E flat or something.

Freddie Mercury: E flat minor actually… well I hope so. There’s time for that I think, I have a lot of ideas bursting to get out.

Kenny Everett: And you’ve got a film…a film?

Freddie Mercury: Yes, we’ve erm [Laughs] He’s no fool this one. He’s a tart, but he’s no fool!

Kenny Everett: I tell you what, let’s go to this one… I’m not a tart – I’m a DJ! [More laughs and teasing from Freddie] Let’s discuss the film after the news and this little track off the new LP “A Day At The Races”, which is dying to dive into you’re Christmas stocking!!

DROWSE

Kenny Everett: That’s a Roger Taylor track, and Roger’s just had a requiem set for his hair – so we’re all in mourning. We’ll be back with some more really great stuff, including their climactic climax to this LP right after the news. So I’ll see you then, right Fred?

Freddie Mercury: Yes dear, see you then.

Kenny Everett: Ok, bye bye ladies and gentlemen.

Kenny Everett: And now here’s Freddie with the weather!

Freddie Mercury: Oh God! He’s just put it in my lap, I can’t believe it! Weather for the Capitol area; It’s dry with long sunny periods, clean spells this evening, cold…

Kenny Everett: CLEAR spells.

Freddie Mercury: Oh, [Laughs] It’s you’re writing! Clear spells – yes that’s right. Clear spells this evening, cold high feel four centigrade…

Kenny Everett: Oh forget it!

Freddie Mercury: Winds light, force two or three… well this is the way you’ve written it. It’s in code, my god! [Laughs] Two or three mostly west to northwest, becoming south to south west later. [More laughs in studio].

Kenny Everett: Are you done?

Freddie Mercury: I’m sure everybody got that.

Kenny Everett: Yeah, I’m sure…

Freddie Mercury: That does it, you wait ‘till you come to the studio next time!

Kenny Everett: Get your calculators out and work out the weather. Right, here it is folks – the climax of this LP “A Day At The Races”, waiting for a place in your Christmas stocking.

TEO TORRIATTE (LET US CLING TOGETHER)

Kenny Everett: That’s the last track off “A Day At The Races”, the new LP by Queen, and if you had your Grundig out, then you should be ashamed of yourself – you’ve just robbed this millionaire of another 18 & 6. [Laughs].

ROCKET MAN – ELTON JOHN

Kenny Everett: Well what was a civilized little gathering, is now turned into chaos with bubbling heaps all over the studio. It’s 3:30 now on the Freddie and Ken show. Any comments on that, because your manager is the same as his isn’t it?

Freddie Mercury: Yes that’s right. In fact I’d like to dedicate that one to a few friends I know; Sharon, Beryl, Phyllis, Serita, Deirdre all the lovely people who’ve all been nice to us this year.

Kenny Everett: All lady friends then?

Freddie Mercury: Yes, they’re all going into my white book. My black books quite full up actually. [Laughs]

Kenny Everett: He says with champagne bubbles coming out of both ears.

BENJAMIN BRITTON TRIBUTE

Kenny Everett: Well I suppose you could call that a golden oldie, as it was written in 1961. Lovely, I like classical stuff don’t you?

Freddie Mercury: I like a bit of Chopin.

Kenny Everett: I’m a Mozart man.

Freddie Mercury: Well there you are then, we differ.

IT’S OVER – ROY ORBISON

Freddie Mercury: ‘It’s Over’! [Freddie & co sing the last line].

Kenny Everett: The masked mouths of the Mercury entourage, and “It’s Over”. Which was written in 1964 and is one of my faves Roy Orbison, who always did a good tune when called upon.

Freddie Mercury: Yes, very good actually. “Pretty Woman” was very good as well.

Kenny Everett: He did a lot of good stuff, I think he’s fab. I tell you what, Roy was good – but you can’t beat ‘old Dusty.

YOU DON’T HAVE TO SAY YOU LOVE ME – DUSTY SPRINGFIELD

Kenny Everett: Round of applause for Dusty Springfield. She’s great, the only thing that’s wrong with Dusty is that she’s not in Britain today. She’s gone off to California the rotter.

Freddie Mercury: I wish she’d come back actually. She’s very good, a very good singer.

Kenny Everett: I think she’s a ‘nana really, as she’s sat over there and not producing some fab stuff.

Freddie Mercury: I don’t know her, but I think she’s a bit scared to go on. She’s scared of what people might think, especially in this country. I think if she did come back, she’d be liked.

Kenny Everett: She’s be adored, there’s millions of people here waiting for her to come back. I’m not sure what’s wrong with her.

Freddie Mercury: I think she’s got stage fright, she needs a bit more encouragement and a bit more confidence.

Kenny Everett: Now we have another one of your oldies.

Freddie Mercury: Oh? Which one is this?

Kenny Everett: “Love Of My Life”, coming up in just a sec.

Freddie Mercury: This tracks called “Love Of My Life” which…

Kenny Everett: Pull yourself together dear! [Laughs]

Freddie Mercury: I’m perfectly in control, and is dedicated to you dear for being so nice to us today and letting us infiltrating your ‘Be Bop Bonanza’ programme.

Kenny Everett: Shucks, ok.

Freddie Mercury: It’s from our “Sheer Heart Attack” Album – oh no, it’s “A Night At The Opera”. God, we’ve made so many I keep forgetting.

Kenny Everett: It’s the previous and it’s a lovely tune, have a listen to this.

LOVE OF MY LIFE

Kenny Everett: [Lot’s of background laughing] ‘Love of my life’…

Freddie Mercury: I can’t hear the damn thing.

Kenny Everett: It’s over now. You should wear headphones.

Freddie Mercury: Oh I hate those things!

Kenny Everett: I know it kinks your hairdo, but they’re handy and you can hear what you’re saying through them. I feel naked without headphones…[More laughing] Right, it’s thirteen minutes to four and we’re going to sing along at the end of this show ladies & gentlemen, we’ve decided to join Bill Grundy in his cell, for doing naughty things on the wireless. We’re going to sing live, the end of “Bohemian Rhapsody”.

Freddie Mercury: So get your vocal chords ready.

Kenny Everett: Yes, because we want you to all join in with us, because it’s nearly Christmas and you can let yourself go. The end of “Bohemian Rhapsody”, if you forget how it goes, it goes like this…

Freddie Mercury: Oh God, you’ve put me in it!

Kenny Everett: I don’t remember that bit. [Laughter]

Freddie Mercury: ‘Nothing really matters to me’ [Sings the line].

BRIGHTON ROCK

Kenny Everett: Great, an old number by Freddie called “Flick Of The Do Dar” or something…

Freddie Mercury: “Brighton Rock” by Brian May.

Kenny Everett: Really? I thought that was one of yours. Right, here we go then “Bohemian Rhapsody”. Never been done before in it’s life – live in a studio. So we hope you’re going to join in. It’s easy, it’s like Vera Lynn isn’t it. All you’ve got to do is catch onto Freddie, because he’s going to sing the first few lines…

Freddie Mercury: I thought we were all…

Kenny Everett: No, no it’s all yours. Ready? [Laughter] Oh dear, he’s just fainted. You’ve got one minute to lead us into “Bohemian Rhapsody” Go!

Freddie Mercury: I don’t know it… ‘Nothing really matters to me’ [Sings]. I thought you were going to play the track.

Kenny Everett: No, I haven’t got it, I was thinking you being a pro…

Freddie Mercury: I can’t do it live, I mean I need the guitar and multi track, with Brian…

Kenny Everett: Now we know the truth folks, Freddie is a lemon. [Laughter] ‘I see a little silhouetteo of a do dar , scaramouche, scaramouche will you do the fandango’ [Sung in a high pitched voice]

Freddie Mercury: Are you expecting me to sing the full track?

Kenny Everett: Oh I can’t be bothered with these live stars…

Freddie Mercury: I don’t think Capitol have the resources of multi tracking anyway.

Queen released 'A Day At The Races' and peaked at No 1 in the UK. In America, issued a week later, it reached No 5 on the US Billboard album chart and became Queen's first American album to achieve Gold status - and subsequently Platinum

Pic: Queen photographed in the Studio on 28th October 1976

📸 Photo by Lichfield Archive

[aurora-daily]

Aurora: “We have this golden opportunity to truly understand each other beyond religions, cultures and how we look, but we choose to fuel our fear against each other”

An interview with AURORA for Hot Press by Riccardo Dwyer (June 24th, 2024)

There’s an ineffable air of Teutonic mysticism surrounding Aurora Aksnes – an Aurora-aura, if you will. Raised in a small municipality near Bergen, Norway, her elfish appearance, rare humour and all-round quirkiness have led some to cast the 27-year-old as a kind of Nordic folklore character turned chart clambering sensation.

Perhaps this hyperborean categorisation is deepened by her appearances on Frozen soundtracks and John Lewis Christmas ads, as well as a fan-made Wiki site which contains enough hyper-linked lore to make the creators of Skyrim blush.

It’s easy to see why Aurora’s attracted so many dedicated Warriors and Weirdos (her affectionate label for her fanbase). In addition to her one-of-a-kind comportment, she’s released three glorious, genre-meandering albums which artfully zero in on some of life’s biggest quandaries – from inner conflicts to questions about a deity.

Her fourth opus, as anyone shrewd enough to spot the mentions of ‘Blood’, ‘Skin’ and ‘Mind’ in the singles leading up to the project will know, suggests a thematic direction towards us, mere Homo Sapiens.

“With every album there’s one specific thing that really inspires and intrigues me,” Aurora acknowledges. “This time, it’s man’s relationship to man. It’s all about your relationship to your own organs, and how you listen to what they’re trying to tell you, especially the heart. I’ve been reading a lot about the history of anatomy and the abilities we give each organ, and how that varies depending on the era and country.”

The title of the LP is at once a statement and an enquiry – a cry for civility in a world seemingly devoid of compassion and a marker of the artist’s own anatomical reflections. It’s probably best to let Aurora explain all that good stuff though. So, then, What Happened To The Heart?

“That is the question,” she nods. “I’ve been thinking about that a lot. I’m very overwhelmed by the state of the world. We have this golden opportunity to truly understand each other beyond religions, cultures and how we look, but we choose to fuel our fear against each other. We’ve been given the chance to be connected more than ever, but we fail to connect in the right places.”

The golden opportunity for connection – the internet, and more specifically social media – is central to the rampant evaporation of love.

“When I was younger and the internet first came about, I remember trying to understand what it could mean for people,” says Aurora. “None of that happened. Porn and gaming happened instead. We haven’t really made it as far as we all might have expected.

“We see and hear each other, but we don’t feel each other with our hearts. We still let these heart-breaking things happen, we’re watching people in Palestine lose their lives for no reason. We should be on a path forward to a peaceful world, but it seems like we’re heading in the opposite direction.”

This, Aurora suggests, is a result of our human tendencies being exploited by the binary overlords.

“We talk into echo chambers in real life, because we surround ourselves with people who are similar to us, so we don’t often get challenged,” she reflects. “Then we have the internet, which is based on algorithms, so we end up in echo chambers there as well. It’s like the world doesn’t want us to learn from anyone else with a different opinion or to interact with people who oppose us, and that’s something that really scares me.”

UNITY AND LOVE

The issue of climate justice also permeates the record. The origins of What Happened To The Heart? are in fact rooted in environmentalism, after a call to change led Aurora to pose the record’s titular question.

“Indigenous leaders of the world joined together and wrote a letter, ‘We Are the Earth’, basically pleading with leaders of the mass-produced world to lead more with their hearts and less with their minds,” she explains. “The way we live is so heartless and cruel. We take whenever we can. And if we’re not forced to apologise or pay for it, we won’t.

“We will gladly let the people of the future pay for what we’re doing now. And we will gladly let someone far away pay for the clothes we wear, or the food we eat. We know that things are wrong, but we still just go along with it. That’s how the world is today. It’s a weird dynamic to live in as a human, because I don’t know what else I can say. It blows my mind to realise how deep our issues lie.”

Aurora is evidently passionate and well-informed. Does she see it as an artist’s responsibility to weigh in on issues of social justice?

“Well, scientists have tried to warn us about global warming for 50 years and nobody has listened,” she points out. “Leaders of the world don’t want to change their ways because it won’t benefit them. They want to have money now and to not have to think about the world later.

“Sadly, it’s come to the point that artists and musicians, as individuals who connect people, have to deliver the important messages. You have to reach out and appeal to the masses, and artists are the best at doing that – at engaging people and riling them up around unity and love, rather than fear and hatred.”

EIGHT BIG THEMES

She acknowledges her own role in what’s often a ‘mass-produced’ music industry.

“You can talk to companies who do things right, or to people who have a minimal carbon footprint,” she says, “but that’s not where your words are needed. It’s good when you’re part of an industry that has a lot to be better in. There’s more room for the things say to make a difference, instead of talking the same shit to people who know it already.”

What Happened To The Heart? holds up sonically too. It’s rife with romantic melodies, expansive synthscapes and arena-ready choruses, punctuated by Aurora’s distinct, soaring vocals – which have drawn comparisons to both Enya and Björk. However, Aurora finds it difficult to assess her own music.

“I don’t really see it when I’m in it,” she says. “I see it later, when I hear it. I don’t like listening to my own music. I would rather eat a baby.”

They must have some tasty infants in Norway, I laugh – the songs really do sound good.

“This album has a huge range,” she admits. “It’s been extremely fun to play around with, because I wanted it to symbolise both lyrically and sonically a process of pain – and the two paths you can choose, self-destruction or self-healing. With humans, it seems that pain often inspires more pain – hurt people hurt people.

“I see all of my music as being a really clear extension of me, and I think that’s really showing in the production. It starts really soft and spiritual, and then it ends on a really hard and human note. It’s going to be fun to sing live. I’m shitting myself with excitement.”

Using that phrase as a gauge of excitement rather than fear is indicative of Aurora’s uniqueness. She goes against the grain in most facets of her artistry, even imposing a Tarantino-style limit on her creative output. Strictly committed to releasing no more than eight albums, the decision tracks back to her early days as a musician.

“I started writing songs when I was about nine,” she says. “Songwriting was beginning to give me a new sense of meaning in life and made me feel better than anything else I had ever touched or let touch me, and I just had a moment thinking, ‘Oh my God, there’s so much I could write about. What do I want to say?’

“I remember taking it really seriously and writing down a map of all the things I want to say, and there were roughly eight big themes that I wanted to approach.

“First up was The Demons. The Warrior was chapter two and then chapter three was God. Now we’re at The Human, but yeah, there’s eight things and I’ve said four of them. It’s going well so far.”

[dustedmagazine]

Listening Post: Gastr Del Sol

Photo by James Crump

Gastr Del Sol was the convergence of two individuals who had not spent their youths like anyone else and were on their way to lives quite unlike most lives. Between 1991 and 1998 David Grubbs and Jim O’Rourke made a sequence of records that simultaneously pointed out what a lot of music listeners were missing and where music might go next if it was really interested in being interesting. Grubbs came from Louisville, Kentucky’s hardcore scene; he played in Squirrel Bait while he was in high school, and took Bastro with him to college. Jim O’Rourke grew up tracking down recordings from the far reaches of every fringe and then setting about making his own place within each method he learned. Before he was out of college, he’d already made connections with Henry Kaiser, Derek Bailey and the folks at Ina GRM. Each was a guy who knew what the other did not, and their collaboration pushed both to make music that they would never make again with anyone else.

Gastr Del Sol began when Grubbs decided to let Bastro get quiet, and made one LP before O’Rourke came aboard. Their first album together, Crookt, Crackt, Or Fly, was assembled from miniaturized poetry, elongated post-punk riffs, frozen improvisation and fluid, texturally-focused compositions. Their last, Camofleur, is a droll pop statement completed just weeks prior to the collapse of the duo’s relationship. The acrimony between them took a couple of decades to die down, but around the same time that they buried the hatchet, a live recording of their final concert surfaced. We Have Dozens Of Titles shuffles together that performance plus every compilation, single, or EP track that Gastr Del Sol released outside their core Drag City discography.

Intro by Bill Meyer

Jonathan Shaw: I have admired Gastr del Sol from a sort of distance. I like “At Night and At Night,” from the terrific Hey Drag Citycomp; I know Upgrade & Afterlife quite well and dearly love “Dry Bones in the Valley...”, the Fahey cover collab with Tony Conrad. The first song on this new-ish record sidles in alongside those wooden textures, but is a more anxious affair. I like that it never quite boils over or takes its propulsive energies to catharsis. It’s sort of a complement to the conversation with the French kid blowing up firecrackers at the track’s close: it can’t quite move forward, in spite of all of the things that want it to.

That’s also a handy metaphor for my relationship to the music. When I have listened to Crookt, Cracked..., I get the sense that these are really, really smart folks, doing some smart stuff, but I haven’t quite connected with and moved into the sounds. They can be forbiddingly remote. So, I am glad for this record, and its invitation to revisit the band’s trajectory.

Bill Meyer: Each record is so different that I can easily see someone liking one and not likening others, and if you held a gun to my head, Upgrade & Afterlife is the one I would name as my favorite. Which makes it all the more interesting that this collection spans their existence from O’Rourke’s first presence (the Teenbeat single — and it’s pretty amazing that they ended up on that label) to the very last concert (that trip is probably when the encounter with the Francophone child occurred, since the concert was in Quebec).

By virtue of its length and timespan, We Have Dozens Of Titles shows more sides of Gastr Del Sol than any other record.

Bryon Hayes: I think that’s one of the band’s traits that I find appealing, that their sound and approach shifted from record to record. “At Night and At Night” was my introduction to the band, and it also seems to encapsulate multiple faces of Gastr Del Sol in a single track: a drone intro, followed by a guitar/poetry passage, and then a dollop of minimalism accompanied by backwards cymbal splashes. I bought Hey Drag City for Pavement, Silver Jews, and Smog but was introduced to some new and intriguing sounds across the whole of the comp. That track, and Gastr Del Sol as a whole, always felt like a riddle or a logic puzzle to me, albeit one that continuously changed, so it wasn’t possible to “solve” it. But I actually like that fact: the thrill of the act of investigating is pure enjoyment itself.

I never did get to experience Gastr Del Sol in a live setting, so those tracks on We Have Dozens of Titles are particularly revelatory for me. I like the more stripped-down setting of “The Seasons Reverse,” for example. Maybe even more than the version on Camofleur. I’d also bet that the field recording of the kids came from Victoriaville. The town is far enough into Quebec that it’s likely there was a language barrier between O’Rourke and the local youth at the time. Also, the drawn-out version of “Blues Subtitled No Sense of Wonder” feels much fuller and richer in the live setting than it does on Camofleur. I’m not saying I dislike that album, but I too would pick Upgrade & Afterlife as my favorite...

Bill Meyer: Because I lived in the same town as Gastr Del Sol, I was fortunate to see them a lot. The concerts were pretty different from one another, and didn’t always sound much like the most recently released record. When they played with John McEntire, things could be more rock-ish, and I have one fond memory of them getting pretty wild with the feedback. Afterwards O’Rourke seemed embarrassed, like he’d lost control and done the wrong thing. There was room for spontaneity, but they were not an improv act. In 1997 they did lock into the two guys with two acoustic guitars thing for a while, probably because they had a fair number of out-of-town gigs in their later years; they didn’t necessarily want to lug a lot of gear around.

Another aspect of living in the same town with them was seeing the other things they had going. O’Rourke could often be seen accompanying someone whose work he championed (ex: Rafael Toral), and they both played with Red Krayola (although O’Rourke bailed for a while and Grubbs kept going), Edith Frost, and Arnold Dreyblatt.

Jonathan Shaw: Never saw the band, and the live material on this comp is what’s impressing me most. Given my proclivities toward their work with acoustic guitars, I am most compelled by “Onion Orange,” which works a space between gentle and tense to very satisfying effect. The repetitive sequence of notes in that initial six-or-so minutes is really engaging; it invites anticipation, flirts with letting that become apprehension. I can imagine that would be even more powerful in a real room, with the players really making the noises in front of you. But even here, via the mp3 I am playing on a device, it’s strong stuff.

Bill Meyer: I still need to a-b that with the original on Grubbs’ solo album.

That album, Banana Cabbage, Potato Lettuce, Onion Orange, seems not to be on Bandcamp, and Table of the Elements is long defunct. I’ll have to pull out my CD and play it. On the original edition, Grubbs plays everything, but O’Rourke recorded two of the album’s three tracks. I remember it being very still, a Grubbs take on Morton Feldman. What you hear in this live performance, Jonathan, is probably what makes me think I like this new version better than the original. There’s a management of tension that probably comes from two people playing it together in real time.

The way that We Have Dozens Of Titles is sequenced, with live tracks littered throughout the collection, makes it easy to forget that we’re hearing a complete set here.

Ian Mathers: There’s a relatively well-known tweet (for those of us that are too online, at least) where a guy who’s only ever seen one movie sees a second and immediately compares it to his only experience. As someone who’s never heard Gastr del Sol before (although they’ve lingered somewhere on my impossibly long “get to this someday” list) and only really knows Jim O’Rourke’s work via his Bad Timing album, I had my own “Getting a lot of ‘Boss Baby’ vibes from this...” moment playing the opening live version of “The Seasons Reverse.” The guitar playing there immediately put me in mind of Bad Timing, which isn’t a bad thing! I was slightly relieved when this compilation pretty immediately shows off different aspects of his and Grubbs’ sound, even in the other live tracks.

And while I did enjoy all of We Have Dozens of Titles, enough so that I’m wondering based on the comments here which of their albums I should check out next, the live tracks do feel like a cut above everything else. I’m probably going to try listening to just them, and while I respect the choice to scatter them throughout this release despite being one show (do we have any idea if they preserved the order of the setlist, or jumbled that up as well as splitting them up?) there is a part of me that wishes it was a separate release. Which is kind of silly, I know — absolutely nothing is stopping me from just playing the live stuff whenever I want, and I’m very glad to have the rest of the material here. My first question for those more knowledgeable: is the album version of “Blues Subtitled No Sense of Wonder” as amazing as the live one here, and should I make that my next stop?

Bill Meyer: If you like the live version of “Blues Subtitled No Sense of Wonder,” you definitely need to check out the studio version. For that reason, I’d point you to Camofleur and then suggest that you work your way backwards through the catalog.

Bryon Hayes: The album version has beautiful vocal harmonies with lyrics that are dryly humorous; the title of the box set is derived from them, actually. The music on the box set version feels fuller and louder than that on the album, the electronics bolder and noisier, accompanied by rich organ tones. Also, that interlude of shouted movie dialogue (or whatever it is), is not in the Camofleur version. Both are appealing, but I enjoy the live version slightly more. If Grubbs sang on the live version, it might be the clear winner for me.

Ian Mathers: Interesting, thanks for the tips! If I’m remembering correctly, there’s no vocals on this collection for at least a while, and I was slightly nonplussed when they came in; not bad, certainly, but it felt slightly out of place with the music. (I was working while listening, which might be the culprit there.) I’ll be interested to A/B the two versions and see what I think.

Bill Meyer: I just drove past the Lyon & Healy building at Lake and Ogden, which prompts the question — what do you make of “The Harp Factory On Lake Street”?

Jonathan Shaw: I sort of like it when there are vocals — in part because of the poetic nature of what’s sung (see “Rebecca Sylvester” on Upgrade & Afterlife), in part because it feels grounding in musical contexts that frequently get very abstract.

Bill Meyer: I like the way you frame that, Jonathan. Grubbs’ words do have a way of anchoring part of the music, bringing a sonic fixedness that contrasts with the music around them, but also introducing an uncertainty of their own because of their sometimes-oblique content.

Roz Milner: I’ve just been lurking this thread. I’m not familiar with this group, although I do like what little Jim O’Rourke’s music I’ve heard (Bad Timing, Happy Days). Any recommendations on where to start with them?

Tim Clarke: I’d start with Camoufleur, which is easily their most accessible album. I have a bit of an uneasy relationship with Gastr Del Sol. I got into them soon after I became obsessed with Jim O’Rourke’s Eureka, but it was quite a shift in tone from that album. I do enjoy Camoufleur a lot, and the album versions of “The Seasons Reverse” and “Blues Subtitled No Sense of Wonder” are, in my opinion, far superior to the live versions on We Have Dozens of Titles.

Gastr Del Sol are quintessentially experimental, in that much of their music sounds so open-ended, as though O’Rourke and Grubbs are constantly wondering what x would sound like played at the same time as y, whether it’s an open, suspended acoustic guitar voicing alongside a sour synthesizer drone, or some piano with some field recordings or samples. Upgrade & Afterlife actually freaks me out! The first time I listened to it after buying it from Rough Trade in London, I couldn’t venture past the opening track as a massive gnarly insect flew in through my open window while I was listening to it on a spring evening. It scared me so much I don’t think I’ve revisited the album since. There are moments on We Have Dozens of Titles that are truly magical, so I think I’ll have to get over my fear and revisit Upgrade & Afterlife after all this time.

Christian Carey: The timing of this release is interesting. David Grubbs was just appointed Distinguished University Professor by CUNY, the highest faculty distinction possible. In addition, he was just awarded the Berlin Prize, and will be in residence there next year. Wonder if the awards might have helped to fund the recording project.

Jonathan Shaw: Distinguished Prof at CUNY — pretty swell. Makes sense. Some of Gastr del Sol’s headiest stuff has the feel of the “experimental,” and in ways that engage the connotations of knowledge and concept in that term (which often gets used lightly and lazily, IMHO). That might have something to do with why I like the live tracks so much. There’s an organic quality to them. Still thorny and challenging music, like the ebbs and flows that make “Dictionary of Handwriting” disorienting and strange. But it’s happening. It’s made, not just thought or assembled.

Jennifer Kelly: Once again, not super immersed in this band, though I had a copy of Crookt, Crackt or Fly at one time, which I can’t find and don’t remember very well, though I’m listening to it on YouTube right now, and the combination of Grubbs’ wandering vocals and aggressive, stabbing guitars seems familiar-ish. So, coming to this a bit cold, though I’ve enjoyed Grubbs’ more recent work with Ryley Walker and Jan St. Werner — and there are definitely some common threads. Nonlinearity, an elastic sense of key and rhythm, a haunted room kind of aesthetic.

I found this track-by-track exposition at the Quietus, which I was trying to read as the songs came up and it’s quite good. I especially liked the paragraphs about “The Bells of St. Mary’s,” written for what sounds like a truly bizarre Christmas comp with Merzbow and Melt Banana on it. Gastr del Sol’s lone concession to the holiday form was sleigh bells, though Grubbs says the main reference was to “I Wanna Be Your Dog” not “Jinglebells.”

Anyway, you might enjoy this.

Tim Clarke: In addition to the Quietus piece, this recent podcast interview is also very enlightening in regard to the history of the band. A rare opportunity to hear Jim O’Rourke chat lightheartedly too.

Having spent more time with the album now, I realize that my listening gets derailed by a couple of Grubbs’ and O’Rourke’s tendencies with this music. The first is when Grubbs does a kind of scat singing that follows the spiky contours of the acoustic guitar parts. And the second is when they retreat into near silence.

Bill Meyer: Near-silence is an O’Rourke strategy to make sure that the volume is set high enough when you get to the loud part.

Christian Carey: I’m curious what connections to later projects people hear in the recording. As TJ mentioned, there are some mannerisms that seem to forecast avant moves by both Grubbs and O’Rourke, with greater assuredness in the idiom. The post-rock vibe is unmistakable, and I am finding the songs with connections to Tortoise et. al. to be the most compelling music-making here.

Bill Meyer: Re: similarities with Tortoise, it’s worth keeping in mind that John McEntire of Tortoise was also a member of Bastro and a key non-member contributor to Gastr Del Sol. Re: the term post-rock, I appreciate the irony that Gastr Del Sol was actually O’Rourke’s entree into rock following years of intense work in improvisation, musique concrete, etc. with people like Henry Kaiser, Eddie Prevost, Christoph Heemann and Illusion of Safety. It was his “I’m almost ready to rock" project.

Ian Mathers: Roz, if you still haven’t settled on a way to check out Gastr del Sol, I was in a similar position to you and honestly, I found this compilation a pretty welcoming (and broad-ranging) introduction! I haven’t moved on to checking out any of their albums yet, but I have played We Have Dozens of Titles a number of times, and while I’m still experiencing it more as a gestalt than I am picking out specific elements (so I’m not sure how I’d answer Christian’s question at the moment, for example), I find the time just slipping away when I do. I was reading Steven Thomas Erlewine’s newsletter recently where he was discussing this collection and he described Gastr del Sol as “music that changes the temperature of the room,” and I keep coming back to that as an apt description of what I’m experiencing.

Bryon Hayes: I read somewhere that Grubbs’ The Plain Where the Palace Stood is his solo album most similar to his work in Gastr Del Sol. I’m listening to that record now and it actually reminds me of the little Bastro that I’ve heard along with parts of The Serpentine Similar.

Bill Meyer: Gastr Del Sol’s existence corresponded with Grubbs’ time at University of Chicago, where he was getting his PhD. I believe it was in poetry, and the words he wrote for the band’s songs reflect that study.

Christian Carey: I've been having fun poring over David Grubbs’ trilogy of books and guessing which stories might be about Gastr del Sol. He's excellent at being covert, but I would be surprised if they weren't featured in some of his writing.

[aphrogeneias]

𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞'𝐬 𝐧𝐨 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐨𝐰 — 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐟𝐢𝐯𝐞

summary: you're running out of time, and eddie is the only one who knows what might save you.

pairing: eddie munson x fem!reader

warnings: angst. hurt/comfort. reader is close to being vecna'd (or is she?)

author's note: i didn't make any changes to this chapter because honestly, i like it the way it is, and it has a lot of sentimental value to me.

series masterlist

5.

He found you hiding under the bleachers a few days later.

Gareth told him he had seen you walking towards the field right before class started, and something in Eddie's heart squeezed. He knew you weren't the type to skip class — trust him, he would know. Not only because he’d been skipping class expertly since middle school, but because, since he’d met you, his eyes were always looking for you in a crowd, his face lighting up whenever he saw you from a distance, just going about your life.

He didn’t want to admit he was too scared of talking to you at school. Eddie used to tell himself it was for your sake, that you probably wouldn’t want to be associated with the freaks and the geeks, but the truth was that he wouldn’t be able to handle the rejection if you were to pretend you didn’t know him. Not that you would ever do that, knowing you the way that he did, rationally, that was ridiculous to even consider, but he let his insecurities get the best of him anytime he saw you.

That all went out of the window when he rushed to the football field, replaying the last conversation you’d had that weekend. Don’t worry about me, you’d told him, but it was impossible not to, not when he couldn’t stop thinking about you and the sad smile you’d given him, the one that would not reach your once lively eyes.

You were sitting on the ground, legs stretched before you, fiddling with the walkman in your hands. It took you a while to recognize his presence as he walked towards your side, slowly lowering himself to sit beside you. Being by your side had always felt right — as someone who was always struggling with his sense of belonging, he never questioned himself when he was with you.

"Munson." You greeted, resting your headphones around your neck. Your smile looked better that day, a sweet grin that almost made all of his worries melt away. 

Mirroring you, he greeted you by your last name. Unsure of where to begin, he started with what was easiest. "What are you listening to?"

Without saying anything, you handed him your headphones, delicately setting them on his head, brushing his long hair out of the way. Eddie tried to ignore the shiver that rose up his spine after feeling your hand run through his hair, even if briefly, but it was hard to concentrate on anything else.

He did, though, and eventually he recognized the voice singing in his ears from his uncle's old records.

"There's a place

Where I can go

When I feel low

When I feel blue…"

"The Beatles?" He felt his lips stretching in a teasing smile — after all this time, he should have expected it. "Really?"

Sighing, you took your headphones back from his outstretched hand, lingering a little where your fingers touched. Pausing the song, you shook your head in disagreement. "You can make fun of whatever you want, just not my favorite song."

"I just thought you were more of a Stones girl, to be honest."

He watched you breathe out a weak laugh, closing your eyes as you struggled to hide your grin, and shrugged, but didn't say anything else. You looked tired, Eddie realized, like you hadn't slept well the night before.

"That's… your favorite song?" He just wanted to keep you talking, in hopes of getting you to tell him something, anything."

"Yeah, I think it's always been. Since I can remember." There was something personal in the way you told him that, like this was something you hadn't told a lot of people. "My dad used to play this record all the time, their first LP. I still remember how the sun was shining through the curtains of our old house when I heard it for the first time, how our living room looked, the way that I kept asking him to play it again and again. I don't remember much from that time, but I do remember this."

Nodding, he took in your words in silence. Not knowing how to react, he blurted out, "You know, Ozzy likes them too."

"Ozzy… Osbourne? The Prince of Darkness?"

"The Beatles are Ozzy's favorite band too. They were his biggest influence, though I don't know what he saw in them, honestly."

Laughing, you elbowed him lightly in the arm. Eddie realized, then, that he'd keep doing whatever he could to distract you. "That's interesting, to say the least."

When you fell silent again, he felt you playing with the threads falling from the hole on his ripped jeans. Without thinking, he reached for your hand, slowly intertwining your fingers, giving you a chance to pull away if you wanted to.

You didn't. 

"Are you okay?" He asked, voice barely a whisper, searching for your eyes.

"Could be worse." There it was, that sad smile again. "I'll feel better if you stay, though."

"For as long as you want, sweetheart."

"Dustin?"

The sudden static noise coming from the walkie in Dustin's hands beside him startled everyone's already rattled nerves in the car. It was Nancy's voice, "Dustin? Anyone? It's urgent."

"Urgent?" Eddie shifted nervously on his seat as the younger boy responded.

Nancy didn't take long to answer. "Is Eddie with you? Where are you?"

Without thinking, he grabbed the walkie from Dustin's grip, hands trembling slightly, "Wheeler? I'm here, we're on our way. Is she… is she okay? Where is she?"

"Good. You need to hurry, we're going in the house. Tell Steve to run. Over."

As Steve stepped on the pedal, probably breaking more than one of Hawkins' traffic laws, Eddie held onto the promise he made you.

He said he would stay, he should never have left in the first place.

[oh-cramity-its-amity]

i know this might not make a lot of sense but i listened to linkin park's new single that released today. and i seriously started crying because i miss chester. i miss chester so much. and i know its been seven years or so but i think about his impact on music and his talent as a vocalist often. i think about his existence, and it messes me up sometimes because damn, life really does go on.

and for the most part when i heard lp was doing music again and being back i was so fucked skeptical and against the idea because... i just don't think bands are good when theres vocalist change. and this new vocalist? oh man she kills it but i cant stop thinking about chester. i know its what he would've wanted and for everyone to move on and for them to make music but i feel almost crushed in a way that its not him.

shes really good tho. like holy shit!! im gonna listen to the new album in november when it drops but i do miss him and YEAH he made me change myself to realize i should live but that doesn't take away the fact that he was struggling mentally and you truly never know what someone is going through on the inside :(.

[cypionate60mg]

hello, do you have other songs recs that have similar vibes like if you can't do it good do it hard?

Sure, here's a sampling. All of these are best listened to with headphones.

That track is from this album by Against All Logic, Nicolas Jaar's side project. Worth listening to all the way through. I prefer the first release from AAL. 2012-2017, that first LP, is a lot groovier and more analog-feeling, with many homages to the sentimental sampling style of old school house. In both releases, Jaar puts different sounds in conversation with each other, looping and cutting them to make these gorgeous sound collages. The result varies. In 2012-2017, he turns these old records into something powerfully nostalgic and sensual. 2017-2019 is a little more jagged and digital, but it has better flow from track to track.

If you like the hydraulic sounds of IYCDIGDIH, check out Drexciya, where things go underwater but still remain futurist. This particular track is a good starting comparison, but I highly recommend listening to their entire discography, release by release. I feel like it's important to understand the magical, mysterious way their music entered onto the 90s Detroit scene, one wax pressing at a time. Little vinyl discs with sci-fi art about the African diaspora. Other people explain it better. They crafted a mythos that many people have written about. You could start listening here.

The members of Drexciya had all sorts of side projects too, many of which served as further commentaries on race in the electronic music scene. I'll let you discover those for yourself.

If AAL's 2017-2019 is a stainless steel blade, then Daft Punk's Homework is a fork in a microwave. It still holds up well, if you like a thudding, fuzzy, driving sound. A far cry from the poppy stuff they did later in their career.

Some of Arca's older music, like that from her debut album Xen, might interest you if you're into something a little less tied to rhythm and more spacious. But there are dancier tracks peppered throughout her discography. She's always going to sound incredibly cutting-edge.

If you liked the darkness of early Arca but still want the insistent rhythms of AAL, try this out. A little more industrial. This particular Tzusing album holds a special place in my heart.

And if it was the Lydia Lunch sample in IYCDIGDIH that really captured your attention, then perhaps you'd like to hear more from her.

Happy listening

[explosionshark]

tagged by @theomenroom! thanks carolyn!

Rules: Put your On Repeat playlist on shuffle and post the first ten songs that show up.

"Moon Sign Gemini" by State Faults - been really getting into these guys lately. Chaotic post-hardcore that has really strong melodic moments to break up all the noise. This song is only like a minute long so I always have to listen to it like 4 times in a row, it's so good

"We Know the Score (feat. Pain of Truth)" by Stand Still - maybe my favorite song off the debut Still Standing LP. They're from Long Island, NY and they SOUND like it -- that really strong, melodic hardcore inflected emo that bands like The Movielife and early Brand New. Super fun, very catchy, still aggressive.

"Maybe It's Me" by Four Year Strong - speaking of melodic hardcore! "Easycore" if that term doesn't make you cringe out of your skin. The new FYS album is bold and weird and really, really charming. This song has one of the most infectious riffs of the year, imo. Can't get enough.

"fleahouse" by Static Dress - so everything from 20 years ago is having a comeback and emo-influenced metalcore (or metalcore-influenced emo?) is no exception. Of all the new young bands peddling this brand of nostalgia, I think Static Dress might be doing it the best. Perfect ratio of clean to harsh vox, very melodic but still hard enough to get you headbanging a little. Could have been a Taste of Chaos band in '08, for sure.

"The Joke" by Coheed and Cambria - you know what let's not talk about this one

"You're Part of It" by Ben Quad - been getting really into Ben Quad lately! As well established by now, this has been my emo renaissance year. Ben Quad are a lot more midwest emo influenced, great noodly guitars. This song goes pretty hard. It's got such an incredible build-up, I keep this on repeat sometimes just so I can get to the end again and again

"Puntería (feat. Cardi B)" by Shakira - Absolute certified jam- fun beat, lyrics that make me blush even though i'm not fluent enough to translate everything, makes you bop around every time it comes on. My family's mexican, I'm from a very Latino neighborhood - when there's a new Shakira record, especially one as drama-laden as this, you hear it. Super fun

"Vigilantes" by Angel Sword - FINISH HEAVY METAL. I was fucking obsessed with this record for like all of July and a good chunk of August. Just fun, grimy, greasy trad metal. Jean jacket music, you feel me? The riffs are very bright and melodic and I really love the vocals - kinda rough around the edges in a way that's really charming to me. This song is 100% perfect, wouldn't change anything about it.

"The Peopling of London" by Maritime - got back into this album this year. Fun little indie rock jam from 2011, a band made of guys who used to be in The Promise Ring and the Dismemberment Plan.

"I'm Content With Losing" by Underoath - 20th anniversary tour for They're Only Chasing Safety is this year and I'm soooooo excited. It's been a fun record to revisit, very nostalgic and rewarding now this far away to see HOW big an impact it had on the scene at the time. I mean, that Static Dress song further up the list sounds the way it does BECAUSE of this band (fun fact: they're opening that tour lmao). Anyway, good shit. I love it.

Spotify Playlist Here

tagging @holdsteady, @nataliving, @gothprentiss, @coraniaid, @heated-drama-between-men, @necrotic-biotic , @shewhosleepsalotincemeteries , @trans-gothic , @thanksforthedinosaur , @angrypedestrian

[bubblesandgutz]

Every Record I Own - Day 828: Blasphemy Fallen Angel of Doom

Hey everyone. It's been awhile.

I haven't been home much in 2024 and consequently haven't spent much time with my records. I have a couple of stacks of "recent arrivals" that are actually a few years old at this point, among them the debut album by British Columbia black metal pioneers Blasphemy, Fallen Angel of Doom.

Released in 1990, Fallen Angel of Doom set the template for bestial black metal while also helping influence the bourgeoning second wave of European black metal. Much like their Norwegian peers, Blasphemy's recordings were pretty gnarly, and their private lives were rife with criminal activity. And also like the Norwegians, you're more likely to see their shirts than hear their music in the public sphere.

I'll be honest, I haven't connected with Fallen Angel of Doom, mostly because the recording is fairly impenetrable. Of course, black metal bands have always leaned into raw recordings, but Fallen Angel of Doom is particularly tough because the vocals are so. damn. loud. in the mix. Sometimes that can work (see: Beherit's Drawing Down the Moon or Darkthrone's Panzerfaust), but I struggle with it here. Then again, it took me ages to come around to a lot of the second wave black metal stuff, so I'm willing to be patient.

Given the ugliness and messiness of the Blasphemy LP, I'm a little startled by how often I see Blasphemy shirts at metal shows, particularly in comparison to a lot of far more popular artists. Consequently, I think about Blasphemy a lot in the context of modern politics. Just because you see a political candidate's sign all over town doesn't mean everyone is voting for them. Having a fervent and outspoken fanbase of a candidate or a cause can create the illusion of popularity.

I also think of Blasphemy a lot as a forty-something fan of underground metal. I remember as a young'un feeling like you HAD to like these "quintessential" cult bands. And if you didn't, then you HAD to be outspoken about why you didn't like them. One of the perks of getting older is simply not caring what other folks think about your allegiance to some mythical canon of niche music. I like the idea of Blasphemy more than I like the actual music of Blasphemy, and I have no qualms about being open and honest about it.

And finally, I think about Blasphemy a lot because my record collection is rapidly growing to a point where I really need to weed records out, and I only have so much room for LPs that might grow on me later. I probably spend too much time internally debating whether to scope out new music, listen to an old favorite, listen to a current interest, or try to garner an appreciation for an older record every time I turn on my stereo. Somehow, there's always a little voice in the back of my head that says "you could always give that Blasphemy LP another chance."

So for now, Fallen Angel of Doom stays in the collection.

[doomedandstoned]

New Zealand’s SIDEWINDER Reveal 2nd Single “Prisoner” from upcoming ‘Talons’ LP

~Doomed & Stoned Debuts~

By Billy Goate

It's been just a minute since we released our compilation Doomed and Stoned in New Zealand, which we were honored to have preserved by The National Library of New Zealand. The current of underground heavy rock and metal is still strong in The Land of the Long White Cloud (or if you prefer, Middle Earth).

Our latest discovery is Wellington five-piece heavy rock beast SIDEWINDER, who today air their latest single "Prisoner" from the upcoming LP 'Talons' (2024), an album that has some monumentally heavy moments (wait'll you hear "The Depths"). We've already gotten a taste of the band's bouncy heavy psychedelic groove with the first single "Disarm The King," and the second showcases their swagger even further with soaring melodic lines, crunchy southern sludge riffage, chugging bass, and workhorse drumming.

Jem Tupe is a powerful vocalist, on the order of Laura Donnelly from King Witch. She can really belt it out with ferocity and it meshes really well with the swampy might of the band's hefty, hefty low-end. Sidewinder is taking no prisoners with this one -- a big sound through and through.

"Prisoner has been a staple for us with our live shows for years," says guitarist Ben Sargent. "It was our opener for a while and quickly became a crowd favourite. We did a few things we hadn't tried before with the recording: like the whisper track through the verses. A lot of the lyrical content refers to Tartarus too which tied in with overall themes of the album. Big riffs, dissonant verses, lead breaks and heavy bridge sections – Prisoner's got it all."

"Prisoner was one of those songs that came together naturally and without too much difficulty," adds guitarist Thomas Rousell (yes, we've got two axemen at the ready with Sidewinder). "Ben had a banging riff, we threw in some rolling verses and great melodies, it all came together to make a killer track. The crowd have been hearing this one for quite some time now, but there's some special bits added to the recording that really lift the track to new heights."

Sidewinder's Talons strikes on August 23rd c/o Wyrmwood Records (pre-order here).

Give ear...

Talons by Sidewinder

SOME BUZZ

Since their formation in Wellington back in 2021, NZ heavyweights Sidewinder have always summoned the biggest riffs and most monumental of grooves possible to carve their own path out from the underground.

In a short space of time, they’ve proven themselves to be an integral part of the burgeoning NZ hard rock/stoner scene and this summer they return to the fray with their eagerly anticipated follow-up to their 2022 debut, Vines.

Due for release this August, new studio album Talons is a breathtaking byproduct of their tight, high-energy performances and sold out shows with bands like Orange Goblin and Sasquatch. A swirling tempest of bluesy southern rock and grunge in keeping with the quintet’s heavyset approach to sonic exploration, it draws on influences that span decades, from the hard-driven strut of Kyuss to the spirited sensibilities of Church of Misery.

"We’re really excited for this album,” explains guitarist Ben Sargent. “It’s a lot darker and heavier than our last. There are some monster riffs throughout, some great psych and doom sections and plenty of that eerie, swampy blues thing we do too."

Featuring new vocalist Jem Tupe; guitarists Ben Sargent and Thomas Rousell, bassist Sean Fitzpatrick and drummer Grant Lister, Sidewinder is primed and ready to bring it all home in the most spectacular of fashions, with their, “wall of riff-heavy psych, with lashings of delta-blues.”

Produced by James Goldsmith (Beastwars, End Boss, Planet of the Dead) and mastered by Will Borza (Deftones, Smashing Pumpkins), just one listen to "Prisoner" showcases just how heavier, darker, and more powerful they’ve become.

Follow The Band

Get Their Music

[owmylasagna-blog]

oh nooo i'm sorry you're sick lasagna :( i'm glad your skates came though that's exciting!! i'll still hit you up for some headcanons if you feel like sharing 👀 id love to hear more of your lore for the eds' parents and perhaps bro...

i'm trying to think of my own indulgent headcanon to share that i haven't already told you 🤔 i will say that your use of shania twain in lps made me hc that edd would secretly be a big fan of hers. i know it's kinda ooc but it's really funny to me. he's a sap and her songs can be pretty sappy. there's also a lot of pedal steel in her music which automatically makes me think of him.

oh also will ed and may's wedding be included in lps?

Thanks! I appreciate the message ❤️ I’m so jazzed the skates came! I immediately did a little shimmy around my tiny ass apartment and might take them for a spin on my street once the rain clears up.

Hmmm time to rack my brain for some other headcanons for the Eds’ parents. Let’s see:

I wrote this in like me still but I think Edd’s parents get a divorce once he’s 18. I sort of hint at this but in my mind his folks are more amicable colleagues than romantic partners: not that they don’t care for each other, but they know pretty early on after having Edd that they are more friends than husband and wife. They do a lot of things out of obligation and respectability.

While I imagine most of the parents in the cul-se-sac to know one another (possibly even have grown up together - we love intergenerational beaf), Edd’s parents are an enigma and literally never socialize. This rubs most of their neighbors the wrong way, really pisses off Eddy’s parents, especially his mom, who takes it super personally (and probably rightfully so).

Sort of a popular one, but I also like the idea of Ed and Eddy’s dads being business partners selling used cars. Or actually, Ed’s dad sort of being Eddy’s dad’s superior 👀.

I think Eddy’s parents (I come them Eddy and Carmela, or Lina for short) are middle school sweethearts. Eddy Sr. threw rocks at Lina during 7th grade recess and she beat him with a fence post and the rest is history.

I imagine Ed’s parents having a pretty big age gap, with his dad being like 10 years older than his mom. We all agree Ed’s mom is a miserable housewife, right? And that his dad is a shellshocked vet? Yes?

Okay this is gonna start out sorta dark but stay with me: in college I read this book called Rampage: The Social Roots of School Shootings which informs a lot of my headcanons on Bro. No I don’t think he did anything THAT drastic, but the book outlined more the conditions that cause kids with mental illness to be ignored for the sake up upholding the community appearance if that makes sense? Sweeping concerning behavior under the rug to not raise concern or point fingers at the parents or adults for failing. I sort of see peach creak as a similar town.

@gettingfrilly wrote this too and much more eloquently I might add but I always thought both Bro and Eddy have undiagnosed ADHD.

I could go on but I’ll stop there for everyone’s sake. I get more into Eddy’s family in the next chapters of Ed is Thicker than Mud (;

Hahahaha no I love Edd being a Shania fan 😂 sometimes headcanons that are a little ooc add to the world building. Dude contains multitudes. I also like to imagine Edd’s taste in music being a strange mix of experimental obscure + borderline cheesy (I was just listening to the OST for Xanadu by Olivia Newton-John/ELO that makes me think of Edd for some reason). But I’ve never thought of connecting the pedal steel guitar in Shania Twain’s music with Edd. Maybe he can serenade Eddy… 😛

Yes! The EdMay wedding is meant to be the last chapter *cough* I mean. The thrilling conclusion. Heh. Though I imagine at least 4 more chapters between where I’ve left off and the end of the fic.